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#with me when i just try to ask them nicely to please use tone indicators like please its not that hard but you dont care because it doesn't
pearlymel · 2 months
Note
Hiii!!
Love your work!! If you’re available, could you please write hc’s of Jing Yuan, Natasha, Kafka, Boothill, Jiaoqiu (OOC is fine!!), Sampo, Gallagher, March 7th, and/or Serval with a reader with low blood sugar? Huge self-indulgent comfort ask, but it might resonate with a lot of other people!
My DM’s are open if you ever would like to learn some major symptoms of blood sugar drops. You absolutely do not have to do all of these characters, just giving you some ideas! Have a wonderful day/night!! ☺️💕
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Synopsis: headcanons of the hsr character and reader with a low blood sugar.
Includes: Boothill, Jiaoqiu (might be ooc), Jing yuan, Gallagher, and March 7th.
Notes: i didn't add all of them because i usually write up to 5 characters or so (gonna create my rules sometime this week). But thank you for the request, lovey! I had so much fun writing this, i love writing and exploring new things :) i hope it was to your expectations, and sorry if the symptoms were inaccurate (google was my help i was too shy to dm.)
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↳ BOOTHILL.
—we all should agree that this man is a caring lover, although i see him as the type to forget that you're not like him. You're not metal and scraps like him, and that you're a human being who needs a lil extra care.
—he doesn't think much of it when you first tell him that you tend to have low blood sugar, he even asks random strangers at bars he goes to about this sickness.
Boothill loves all types of fun to do with you, and tonight, you suggested you both dance.
Seeing the hint of a smile gracing your lips when you try hiding it by pressing your face on shoulder, Boothill grins. And he makes no attempt to hide his delight, he tightens his grip on your frame, holding you carefully but firmly against his chest.
"Well now, ain't I a lucky devil," he drawls, the evident sarcasm was in his tone, "Looks like I'm gettin' the chance to dance with a lovely person who shares my love for tryin' new things. I must be doin' somethin' right."
Silly, you think. "You were simply just you. And i love being with you."
Boothill grins, his eyes softening at the edges as he gazes down at you.
"Well now, ain't that a sweet thing to say," he replies, his voice gruff yet affectionate. "I ain't used to hearin' such sweet talk, to be honest." He pauses for a beat, his grip on you tightening ever so slightly.
"But hearin' it from you, it's nice," he continued before pulling you a bit closer against him.
You laugh along with him, bringing your hand to brush your fingertips along his hair, your other hand over the metallic surface of his chest before you slow your movements, you feel dizzy. No, it's not from how much you both were spinning, you both were going slow and careful.
It doesn't go unnoticed by him with the shift in your demeanor, a subtle change in your movements that indicates something is amiss.
"You okay there, darlin'?" he asks, his brow furrowing as he looks down at you. He can feel something amiss with you physically.
"Lightheaded." You mumble, holding onto him. "You... You have uhm.. anything sweet i can take?" He gives you a nod, "Reach into my pocket, I'm sure there's a candy sitting there," he explains, guiding your hand to his pocket, taking it calmly.
You give him a small smile when you reach for his side pocket to grab the singular wrapped candy.
Your fingers fumbles with the wrapper before you pop it in your mouth, sucking on the strawberry flavoured candy while resting your cheek on his shoulder.
"Doin' a little better there?"
"Yeah, thanks my hero."
"Don't you go gettin' all sweet on me now," he mutters with that of gruffness, though he smiles. "You're the one who's supposed to keep me from goin' all soft."
↳ GALLAGHER.
—Oh he's ready 24/7 whenever the situation calls for it. He takes this very seriously and will make sure no funny jokes were made about it, because they're certainly not funny to him and he will kick ass if anyone makes it harder on you than it should be.
What a sight for sore eyes. Truly. And no, he's not talking about the view, he's glancing back at you where you sat while looking up at the skies, your head titled as if you're so immersed.
"Anything on your mind?" He was the first to speak as he approaches you, "A lot of things.. clouding my head." You half shrug, watching him as he takes a seat next to you with a can of some carbonated drink on his side, and you hear the slight hiss of it when he open it with his finger. The carbonated drink fizzes a little between his finger and thumb as he pops the tab open, taking a small sip from it before turning his attention back to you.
His crimson eyes were on the direction you were trying to look at but he can't find what's so interesting about tonight's sky.
“I'm willing to stay here all night and listen.” He reassures you.
"Mhm," you stare blankly ahead now, almost zoning out, and you don't notice how sweaty you're starting to feel, or how your heart starts racing.
Gallagher's eyes narrow as he notices your almost zombie like look of a thousand yard stare. The way you look unmoving and not even acknowledging him.
He doesn't say anything and just hands you his drink, gently tapping the can on your arm to bring back your attention. You don't hesitate to grab it, taking small fast sips.
"Careful," he helps you straighten your back, drinking while slouching isn't exactly good.
You sigh when you hold the can with both hands now, letting it rest on your lap, "Thank you—"
"When was the last time you ate today?" He gently cuts you off.
"Earlier."
“And can you confirm that ‘earlier’ wasn’t hours ago?” He asked, his voice now firm but he tries to stay calm.
"I'm sleepy." You brush his question off instead, looking at him while blinking slowly as you lean to rest your head on the side of his shoulder. Gallagher watches you, letting out a soft scoff at how you tried to change the subject. He knew he wasn’t going to get an answer from you, but he also wasn’t going to let you just avoid the problem either.
"We're having dinner after your little nap, deal?"
↳ MARCH 7TH.
—March.. panics when she finds out for the first time. She asks you if you were okay, if you wanted anything, even when you try to reassure her that you felt fine at times, she wouldn't be convinced until you stay under her watch. She bugs Dan Heng to tell her all the possible symptoms so she wouldn't panic more than she should.
Today, you were March's model for photography, well you always are her model because she says you're the best fit for it.
She lets you try out fun clothes and you shyly and awkwardly try to pose in front of the camera at first, but then you immediately gain the confidence after a few more clicks. Smiling and posing while trying out all the fun combinations of colours and clothes.
She looked at you, wearing clothes she had picked out for you. You looked absolutely beautiful.
The enthusiastic girl was blushing a lot as she kept taking pictures of you, giggling behind the camera even.
"March, mind if i sit down for a bit?" You hated to stop her from her enthusiasm, but you feel lightheaded almost. And you were sure it's not from the flashes.
March immediately stopped taking photos and set her camera down when you asked.
She placed a gentle hand onto your forehead, seeing if you had a fever first. "Are you feeling sick?"
"No, don't panic. I just feel lightheaded. Do you have anything sweet i can take?"
Okay, she is prepared for this, "You're low on blood sugar, are you?" She asked, concerned. March then grabbed a small candy—a lollipop, to be exact—from the camera case and offered it out to you.
"And you came prepared." You try teasing, and she nodded with a light laugh. It was a nice-looking sweet lemon-flavored lolliop.
"I carry them with me just in case!" She replied, You both sit down together, she takes out another lollipop for herself so you wouldn't feel left out.
"We can take pictures while eating these lollipops."
March nodded in agreement with your idea, she was happy that you even said that, it meant taking pictures together for an hour now wasn't boring you out.
Then, she pulled out her camera again, a grin forming on her face, "That's a good idea! Alright, on the count of three—" she pulls the lollipop out, posing as if kissing the candy while you smile widely as the camera clicks on both of you.
↳ JIAOQIU.
—sooo, he's a healer. Then that means we all can agree that he's the attentive lover, and strictly cares about your health and diet, but i feel like he'd be playful about it at times.
You don't remember sleeping for so long when you woke up rather confused, shuffling around the blankets and sitting up on the bed while rubbing your head.
Your fault for skipping breakfast and going straight into your work or chores for today.
You fail to notice at first the pink haired figure next to you, sitting beside the bed so silently that it makes you gasp when you turn around to see him.
He was holding a spoonful of some red liquid that you're sure is spicy concoction. He looks at you expectantly, a hint of mischief behind his closed eyes.
“Say ahh,” he says quietly, enjoying the moment. But you almost try not to laugh.
"What happened exactly?" You ask him, refusing to still take that.. extremely dark red soup. It was so dark you can almost smell the spice in the air.
"Someone forgot to eat their meal i prepared earlier," he hums, still trying to pry his spoon closer to your lips, "so i had to find myself misfortune in the of finding you almost unconscious. You're lucky i was carrying some sweet herbs with me." And you frown at his next words, you want to apologize for how he must've been worried.
As if sensing your next words, he smiles, "none of that. Now, open up." He offers you the spoonful again but you pull your face away.
"Are you sure you're not trying to kill me next?"
Jiaoqiu pretends to pout. His fox ears prick and he gives you a slight pout, "You're so dramatic," he says, his tail flicking with amusement. He holds up the spoon again, still waiting for you to open your mouth.
"My soup will fix your blood sugar. Trust me, it's a secret recipe," Jiaoqiu says with a sly smirk.
"What if it tastes bad?" You regret the words leaving your mouth, because he opens his eyes and stares at you with an almost hurt expression. You take the spoonful in your mouth without another complaint, and he hums in approval while closing back his eyes.
The flavours almost explode in your mouth, it.. wasn't spicy at all. It was rather sweet and savoury.
"You tricked me, it's not spicy at all."
"I never said it was spicy, though." He tilts his head, feigning innocence and confusion.
Despite his antics, you instantly feel better, although he doesn't allow you to feed yourself, he'll do it for you.
↳ JING YUAN.
—This man would spoil you rotten. You're feeling unwell? He would love to take the day off and just look after you, although there is a doctor on the side in case anything gets serious. You're simply tired not because of your low sugar levels, but just because you were? He would gladly invite you in his arms or simply sit next to you while you both chat nonstop about eachother's days if that's what will make you feel better.
You were panting when you decided to train alone in the training grounds, Yanqing offered to train with you but you insisted that you needed that full concentration.
After a while, you do feel exhausted and worn out. The spear dropping from your hands as you bend a bit to rest your hands on your knees to catch some breath.
"Now, now, if you want to get stronger, you'll also need a break." Jing Yuan's call for you is what makes you huff out a chuckle. In his hands is what looked to be a bowl of fruits with a water bottle on the other.
"i wanted to build some muscle." You tell him when he gives you that look whenever you start training alone. It's not that he's against your wishes of wanting to be stronger for your own good, but he wishes Yanqing was atleast there to watch you.
"And, I'm not a baby." You roll your eyes playfully and he lets out a deep laugh. "Eat up." You take the orange first, but he was quick to take it from your hands to peel it for you, so you take the grape instead.
You as well take the bottle, gulping down almost the whole thing. Water has never tasted this good.
"You're not a baby, but you drool like one." You almost glare at his words and he only grins while wiping the excess water and fruit juice off the corner of your lips with his thumb. "That was mean, General." You raise both of your eyebrows at him, he only pats your head back, pulling you in with his arm to just hold you.
"when the time comes, you'll be strong enough to protect me."
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» The devil’s coming but only to worship me_.
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Heyo guys, gals, and nonbinary pals! I'm Donatello, but I more commonly go by Don. I'm your average ninja mutant turtle teen with a penchant for violence and chaotic shenanigans. I'm just a silly guy, don't be afraid to hang around! You can slide something into my inbox while you're at it, I won't mind !
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OC MASTERPOST (Last updated: July 1st)
SONA REFERENCE SHEET
TMNT:FF TURTLE REFERENCES
PRONOUNS PAGE
400 FOLLOWER DTIYS
THE GANG!!!
#atomic bomb [⚛️🧪] - @atomic-rattz (BEST BRO 🗣🗣🗣)
#Nebula [⭐️♠️]- @splatting-stampede (Nee-chan!!!)
#insufferable twink 🧡 - @rawcherrycake (my beloveth.. <3)
Other moots!
#eepy tello 💤 - @mrsleepytello (annoying star-gremlin /aff)
#cassette tape 📼 - @cin3maa (THE LIL SIS EVER‼️‼️)
#Glitter Gloop [🫐✨] - @heaven-is-a-bedroom (Silly-Billy big bro :3)
EXTRA TAGS
#my art - for my art, duh
#purple.txt [👾] - me when I yap
#swords vs tech - my rivalry with @ceruleanterrapin (he's cool guys I swear)
#villain au - anything related to my villain arc! hehhehehe
#cyan.txt [🧬] - My oc DNA's talking tag (he took over my blog once)
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ADDITIONAL INFO UNDER CUT (PLEASE READ)
MY ART REQUESTS ARE CLOSED!!
Please don’t ask if my requests or commissions are open. They aren’t. And I don’t plan to open them any time soon. I’m a self-indulgent artist who draws what he wants, and I’d like to keep it that way.
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INTERESTS Feel free to talk to me about these things!
Splatoon and the Splatoon Manga (aka coroika). It's my favorite video game EVER and I am more than ready to gush about it.
Pokemon. I'm not as well versed in the earlier games, but I do know quite a bit of it!
Legend of Zelda. Specifically BoTW, TotK, TP, and SS.
Kirby. I am I HUGE fan of the eldritch horrors in this game.
Haikyuu, SpyxFamily, Kuroko no Basket, Dungeon Meshi, and Kusuriya no Hitorigoto.
Vocaloid and J-pop. It's all I listen to, actually.
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BOUNDARIES
Tcest, incest, and proshippers DNI
I make suggestive jokes (I'm a teen. What dost thou expect of me), but I won't be drawing NFSW, nor will I accept me or other minors being sexualized. We are not child molesters.
Please be nice! I'm not exactly the best at wording things (tone indicators save my life), but I will never, EVER be mean to someone on purpose (unless they deserve it. Then I'll go ham). While interacting on my blog, please refrain from being toxic. Some thoughts are better left to yourself
NO STEALING MY ART!! I don't know why you'd want to steal it in the first place (it sucks ass), but don't do it anyways. You can use it as long as you give credit.
I don't do commissions, but I take requests! If I see something in my ask box I like, I'll draw it. So, if you have any ideas, feel free to share them! I like having motivation boosters.
Don't.... don't try to flirt with me........ I'm taken....... I won't accept... guys please..... I know I'm hot but like.... please........ I'm also a minor....... guys..... 😞
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EXTRA INFO ABOUT ME!!! IF YOU EVEN CARE!!!
16 years old
5'4"
INTP / 5w4 / 548
I ate a roly poly once (I was fIVE-)
During covid I chose suicide, now I choose homicide :)
I may be a Donnie but I am warning you, I am very. Very dumb
AuDHD (I just say I'm autistic tho because it's funnier)
Chaotic evil
Literally just a cat in a turtle body
Will Bite /threat
Keeps getting adopted by people for some reason
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Yyyyyeeahhhhh that's about it, remember to be nice and have fun and shit. Stay silly gang!!!!
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still-fatemeh · 20 days
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Come love, make me better than I was.
Come teach me a kinder way to say my own name.
Fyodor Dostoevsky X reader
(A little old fyodor fic of mine that's been rotting in my drafts for sooo long. The reader has a name and a vague physical description but feel free to ignore them if you want. I just do this because I hate writing the word y/n, that's all. It's ooc and kinda pointless. So yeah... the new chapter is gonna come out and people might hate him even more so might as well get this over with. Not proofread.)
"You love him despite the burden of Atlas resting on his shoulders,
And he loves you despite the death still clinging to your lips,
and the blood drying at its corners. What a pair you make."
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"I have an idea of… how I’m going to make it up to you." He paused a moment, and smirked at her.
"Though… you’ll have to do me a small favour first."
"A favour, hm? Well... It depends. It depends on what you want me to do for you, but I'll accept. I'll humour you this time and accept without asking what it is." Anna's tone was amused, the amusement bleeding into her gaze as she looked up at him from her book.
"So, what is it that you want from me?"
Fyodor laughed again, and leaned forward as he spoke.
"You seem very confident that you would be willing to do what I ask, though I haven’t even told you what it is… And you don't appear trusting at all..."
He looked her up and down, his smirk growing bigger.
"I think I’ll let you stay in ignorance, just so I can see the look on your face when you realise what you agreed to…"
Anna shot him an unamused glare, mentally face-palming at his smug yet childish antics.
"Now, of course you'd do that, why am I even surprised?" The lady spoke out with a tone that indicated she was used to this, a little bit disappointed but still used to it, as she let out an audible sigh.
Fyodor couldn’t keep a straight face any longer.
"That is… precisely why I’m doing it. I just want to see your face when you realise you agreed to something extremely humiliating. You know me too well, you shouldn’t be surprised at this point."
Fyodor couldn’t hold back a laugh any longer, and started to snicker.
"Trusting you is always a mistake." She said, trying to fight off the genuine smile creeping up her lips.
It was a nice change of pace seeing fyodor laugh, it's been long since she saw him even smile. It didn't matter if it costed her a bit of her dignity to fulfill his favour. It didn't matter if it was something slightly humiliating. She was willing to make that sacrifice, but he didn't have to know that.
"Please, do enlighten me with what it might be, or you'll have to spend the night in your office. Your choice." She mused with a faux cheery tone and set the book down on the coffee table next to her, a bit to hide her anticipation.
Fyodor chuckled once again when he sensed her dread. He was amused that she was so willing to fulfil his favour, without even knowing what it is.
"So you’re fine with something humiliating happening to you, as long as you're think you might be pleasing me? Interesting…"
Fyodor thought for a minute, then decided to tell her what he had in mind.
"I’m assuming you remember what a ‘maid’ is?"
Thirty seconds of awkward silence later...
She was sending daggers his way with her stare.
"No, fyodor. No. Not that weird shit again..."
She was taken aback by his request but not surprised. She was surprised he could say that with a straight face.
"Do you know how weird that is? My dignity doesn't allow me to do that again. I wasn't born into a long line of noble blood for you to dress me up as a japanese servant whenever you're feeling bored."
He'd coaxed her into doing it before, she wasn't going to do that again. That you could tell from the venomous stare she was sending his way.
Fyodor couldn’t hold back another snicker anymore. He knew how she felt, but he couldn’t help how amusing he found it.
"Oh come now, it would be fun! Not for you, of course." Fyodor grinned, as he started to speak again. "I just want to see you look ridiculous as a maid. I don’t think that’s too much to ask." He feigned a look of self-righteousness, bringing the wine glass to his lips to conceal that devilish self-satisfactied grin of his.
"I'd like to see you dressed as a clown too, darling." She gave him a forced smile, batting her eyelashes with false innocence. "Fedya, darling, that's mortifying. Ask something else. You're supposed to be making it up to me that you forgot our anniversary."
Fyodor smiled a thin smile, and leaned back in his seat.
"I did not forget the date, sweetheart. It was simply bad timing. And I'm sitting here with you now, honoring you wishes. So I'd appreciate it if you stopped complaining about it."
His smirk grew a bit, as he thought of another idea.
"Though, I certainly do have another request for you."
"Oh, you..." Anna smiled, shaking her head with faux disappointment.
"Oh come now, I’m sure this one will be easy for you to fulfill... Come closer, sweetheart. I've missed your warmth..."
She blinked a few times, her expression shining with amusement. "Whatever you say, darling..."
She let loose of her hair that was up in a braided bun, before walking up to him. She nudged herself between his knees, planting a kiss on his jawline.
"Now is that close enough for your liking, sir?" Her voice came out as an amused purr.
Fyodor grinned, seeing her give in so easily and let her hair down. Though there was a slight hint of amusement, he genuinely appreciated her willingness to humour him.
"Yes… Very much so."
He ran his fingers through her hair, a deep exhale left his lips that signalled both his satisfaction and serenity. Her eyes fluttered shut as well, that seemed to be relaxing for her too.
But apparently, she couldn't, by any means, get rid of the inevitable dread that found its way to her stomach whenever he acted that nice.
So she asked.
"Though, I may have to ask, what's with this sudden burst of affection? Is there something that you're not telling me?"
Fyodor seemed to hesitate with his answer for a second.
"Nothing at all… it’s just… I do find it amusing to see you submit and humour my wishes…"
He frowned and hesitated, before saying something else.
"Is that alright? Am I getting too excessive… too demanding?"
"No, not at all..."
Anna mumbles under her breath, turning her torse around so her chest brushed, her gaze easing once she found his.
"To be honest... I revel in this affection."
She spoke out softly.
"Only because it comes from you."
She said, her gaze as soft and tender as a spring breeze. She pressed a chaste peck to his cheek, a red mark coloring his pale face.
He turned his head and looked down at Anna as she leaned in closer to him. His face was now a bright red, but he didn’t even care. His eyes locked with hers as his heart rate accelerated.
Oh how hard it was to hide this much fondness... Even a demon like him couldn't.
He smiled, and returned her kiss with a soft one on her forehead.
"Your affection is well received…" He said softly, before pausing to give her another kiss on the cheek.
"…And returned. I… don’t deserve to be treated this kindly, not after what I have done…"
Her gaze softened as she looked at him, softened with a hint melancholy in them.
"I... myself am also far from a saint. It's not rotten work for me. I love you, remember?"
Anna spoke as she fixed his collar and brushed back his hair, just like she always did. As if the words she said were mundane things, that she could say at any time. He could ask her for her heart and she'd give it to him, whole.
Oh, what a waste of precious devotion...
Fyodor looked at her affectionately, it reminded him of the times she would brush back his hair before bed. He couldn’t contain the smile that spread across his face as he saw her like this once again.
He wasn't too far gone...
Was he?
"I…" He said, then stopped himself. It would've been laughably pathetic if he continued talking like that, but...
"Anna dear, would you… still love me that much? If I kept pushing things too… too far?"
His lady dodged his eyes, her eyes focused on the collar of his shirt.
His white shirt, stained with red droplets of blood. Once again.
She sighed.
"Fyodor dostoevsky,"
Full name, it didn't take a genius to figure out she was getting fussy.
"Why are you even... asking me such questions?"
Fyodor was startled when she said his full name, he wasn't used to her speaking to him like he was a kid and was going to get in trouble for something.
"Why am I...?" He echoed her question with his expression shifting into a grimace, as he pondered for a moment.
"...How far can I push things until I've taken it too far?" He clarified.
"It depends on you. It depends on how much you're willing to forgive yourself for. The further you're willing to go for the sake of your plans, for the the greater good, the more you're going to lose yourself."
She said, her face downcast.
"I'm a lost cause, but listen... Dearest, for every crime, there is punishment. You know better, right?"
Her tone was firm but filled with something warm, akin to affection.
Fyodor thought about what she said, and sighed at her words. She was right, of course. But... that was the cost of getting what he wanted. It would be worth it.
"I’m well aware, dear…"
Fyodor shifted his gaze to the floor. He knew that he was already falling deep down the slope, and his thoughts and mind were becoming corrupt and twisted. But that wouldn’t matter, not in the end.
Anna observed his expression with an arched brow and leaned closer. She was still sitting on his lap, her hair loose. This showed that this was far from a serious conversation but his heart said otherwise. The closer she was, the heavier her words weighed on his heart.
"I hope your awareness spreads to more than one category."
She mumbled, still not not looking him in the eyes.
"Don't lose yourself in empty promises. Or else the promised land will be where you'll... finally be buried."
Anna's words ended with a deep sigh, it wasn't one of disappointment but one to indicate she was trying to unwind.
He listened to her words. She sounded like a priestess trying to warn a guilty man of his inevitable fate, but unable to due to the seal of confession. He wanted to tell her that he understood, and he would never lose himself. But he knew that that would be a complete lie. The man he used to be had died a long time ago, a long long time ago…
"And what if that’s the only way for me to achieve my final goal?" He asked softly, finally looking at her again.
"Would you still stand by me? Or… would you walk away for my own good? Would it be for the sake of that promise?"
"I..."
She gulped, looking down, it was hard to swallow the guilt.
"I think I've told you that the promise... isn't the reason I've stayed. It... never was. I... would walk with you to hell itself... Because I... know I wouldn't be able to stop you if you go too far."
Fyodor noticed the sarrow on his lady’s face, she had no idea just how true her words really were. He couldn’t hold back a chuckle, albeit it was a rather painful one.
"If you really mean that… then you’re just as corrupt as I am…"
"Yes,"
She muttered.
"Yes, I am..."
Another sigh escaped her lips as she got off his lap, sitting down next to him, she began braiding her hair again.
He watched with nothing, absolutely nothing, behind those eyes as she went to sit down next to him.
"You sound… regretful." Fyodor said as he kept glancing down at his lap.
"I'm... not regretful."
She dismissed, trying to look like she's busy interlacing the three strands of white hair as the weight of her words became more evident on her face.
"So... Are we still... celebrating our anniversary?" She spoke with uncertainty while putting her hair up, she sounded lost, it was unfamiliar to his ears.
Anna was still braiding her hair like she used to. It was almost nostalgic for him. He didn’t know if it meant anything, but he knew that it was reassuring.
"Yes… I think we should. We can spend the rest of the night together… I’ll make it up to you for forgetting about it earlier." He said with a neutral tone of voice. It was rare for him to be sincere, at least when it wasn’t a part of his plans.
"That's a relief... You've been so busy with work, you've barely caught a wink of sleep."
It was rare fedya came to bed at night, no matter how much she wished he would. curling into his side always helped her rest easier. his presence is a calming one, maybe only to her.
Fyodor sighed and nodded, rubbing his forehead as he looked away.
"We’re both stretched pretty thin aren’t we?" His words came out as a tired admission and Anna gave him another sweet smile. "Perhaps we should go to bed, hm?"
Fyodor thought about what she said, before a smile spread across his face.
It was nice to be wanted, to have her actually want him to stay next to her.
"Yes… I'm pretty exhausted." Fyodor agreed, slowly rising up to his feet and starting to walk to the bedroom with her.
"It's a pleasant surprise for you to actually admit it, sir." She noted with a faint smirk.
The new hideout was barely furnished, it was nothing, not nearly as comfortable as a hotel room. Other than a few chairs and paper files neatly placed on top of one another, there wasn't anything else in the room. His office in the basement was the most busy, littered with wires. His monitors were the only source of illumination in that room.
Their bedroom was no exception, a bed, an armoire and a bookshelf, nothing more.
It was a new hide out every few months. He would've felt ashamed, if it wasn't for her overwhelmingly sweet compliance. she was his bride for God's sake.
Fyodor took a seat on their bed, and watched as she reached for her towel. He was silent for a moment, until he faintly spoke.
"I do agree that I should sleep… it’s just, my thoughts never rest…"
"I know dear, I know..." Anna whispered, observing him with a hint of concern in her eyes, which was a rarity.
He sighed, before looking over at the corner of the room. It was dimly lit, as it was the only corner with a lamp present, and he shifted his gaze towards where his shadow was being projected. Though he spoke softly, he sounded tired as he spoke.
…"Do you mind if I tell you something…?"
..."Go on."
She slowly looked in his direction, her eyes already questioning the exhaustion in his tone.
Fyodor slowly sighed, he took his time to gather his thoughts before he spoke.
"The only time my mind actually… stops thinking…"
He paused for a moment, as if considering whether or not continuing with that admission was a good choice.
"…Is when I sleep next to you."
Fyodor looked at her, his own face bearing an unexpected amount of vulnerability in it. The last time he had felt this bare… was a really long time ago.
Anna's face had surprise in it for a moment, before her lips curved into a coy smile. It was something she never expected she'd hear him say. The traces of surprise melted into a look of affection. It was rare of him to be like this, fyodor could tell that colour rushed to her cheeks despite the dim lighting of the room.
She walked towards their bed and... plastered her hand right on his forehead, checking for a fever.
"The last time you were talking like this, you had pneumonia... Are you well, darling?"
She said, dead serious as she pressed the back of her hand to his chest, trying to detect a rise of body temperature.
Fyodor was visibly surprised for a moment when she pressed her hand to his forehead, checking his temperature. He thought she was going to give a flirty remark on his behavior… And instead she was acting like a mother checking on her child. Not going to lie, it was embarrassing.
"I-I'm quite fine…" Fyodor reassured her with an awkward expression, his cheeks were slightly red, which he quickly hid by averting his gaze. He found it a little amusing that she thought he had some sort of infection, that it was the only reason why he could admit his feelings of vulnerability to her.
"You also said that last time. 'Mister perfectly fine'..."
Her brows furrowed slightly, concern visible in her expression. Fyodor had a long history of disregarding his own health for the sake of his scheming, anna had, unfortunately, had to grow used to it.
She let out a quiet sigh when she didn't find any signs of severe illness, maybe he was just weary.
"I don't know when to believe you, fedya... I never know."
Anna plopped down on the bed next to him, her eyes focused on the ceiling.
Fyodor’s eyes followed her gaze as she looked up at the ceiling. He took a deep breath, as he felt the calmness of exhaustion wash over him. It was a nice feeling indeed, even if he felt that he didn’t necessarily deserve it. This quiet moment they were having was one that they both truly needed…
"Maybe that’s the point… for you to never know." Fyodor said softly, as he chuckled quietly to himself. He looked over at her, his eyes lingering over her.
Her upper lip twitched in mild annoyance as he said that.
"You know darling, you should praise me more for keeping up with all of your mind games." Sarcasm was evident in her tone as she sat up on the bed, giving him a look of amusement.
"You worry me too much..." She admitted, a bit hesitantly.
Fyodor noticed the sarcasm in her tone, as he gave her a playful roll of his eyes.
"Well, forgive me for trying to make your day interesting." Fyodor said jokingly, before taking time to actually praise her. It was a rare occasion indeed where he did." But yes, I suppose you should be applauded for keeping up."
"Oh, please..."
Umi huffed in response to his sarcastic remark. "That's the least I can do. After all... I do find your mind games entertaining."
She got off their bed, reaching down to grab her towel again.
Fyodor’s smile grew, and his eyes followed her as she stood up off of the bed and reached for her towel. The way she smiled was quite endearing, and a part of him felt the urge to compliment her on it… but then he decided against it, as he thought it would be odd if he did.
"Now isn’t that a nice thing to hear?" Fyodor teased, as he laid back down on their bed. Still not wanting to fall asleep just yet.
She merely shook her head at his teasing as she walked towards the bathroom, though she didn't seem bothered at all.
"Fine, sir. just sleep. I'll be back soon."
A small smile from her and the bathroom closes shut.
The light from the bathroom was kind of bothersome, it disturbed his eyes and robbed the room of its peacefulness. The sound of water from the shower came a bit later, but it was comforting in its own way. He could hear the soft sound of water as she began to take a shower. He looked at the bathroom, before averting his gaze elsewhere as he thought about the conversation that they had just had. It was funny… just minutes ago he was admitting that he felt the closest to calmness when he slept next to her, and now she was taking a shower.
Fyodor sighed, before shifting around on the bed, slowly beginning to rest his eyes as the sound of water washed away.
The bathroom door slowly creaked open after sometime. He could hear anna stifling a curse at how loud the goddamn door was. Funny, she probably thought he had fallen asleep, hence she was tip toeing to the closet to get her clothes, careful not to wake him up. He stayed still though, not wanting to give away the fact that he was in fact awake.
He laid in a relaxed way, his eyes still closed, as he waited for her to grab her things as she tried not to make too much noise. Anna gently lifted the covers and slipped under them, right next to him. She couldn't resist the urge to lean in and press a kiss to his cheek.
Fyodor’s body stiffened at the unexpected contact from her. He hadn’t been expecting it, as he never expected her to give him a kiss of her own accord… but it felt nice indeed.
Her hair was still damp and the long-sleeved blue dress had given its place to a loose fitting night dress, which was far comfier.
And she felt him smiling while at it.
"Sorry, did I wake you up?"
She whispered apologetically.
He let out a long breath as he heard her apologies, as he quickly shook his head.
"Mm… no, no…" Fyodor muttered back, as he turned to face her and opened his eyes. When his eyes settled on her, he had a smile on his face.
"So you were awake, huh?" She asked calmly, propping her chin on his chest as she lies down on top of him.
"That doesn't justify the fact that you didn't even bother to change your shirt, fedya..." Another mindless complaint. She twirled a strand of his hair around her finger as she waited for him to speak.
He slowly brought her even closer to him. He enjoyed these moments, these peaceful moments with her where they could let their guards down. A part of him wanted this night to last forever, if only it actually could…
"I... just couldn’t stop thinking about what we spoke of earlier… how I couldn’t rest when I’m not next to you." Fyodor said simply, not even bothering to lie.
Her lips curved into a smile, a smile that fyodor could feel its absolute sincerity in the darkness of the room.
"I'll be here whenever you need warmth. Whatever I can give, is all yours."
After a few moments of her tender gaze, her smile morphed into something more teasing.
"I'll ask again, what's with you acting all sweet tonight? I feel like you're bribing me..."
Fyodor felt her play with his hair, and it felt like a pleasant sensation, one that he didn’t get too often. He had to stifle a chuckle at how her initial smile turned into a teasing one, that’s how he knew her so well. A smile on her face was almost always either genuine or fake, and Fyodor could always tell which one it was. He couldn’t help but appreciate how much of herself she was willing to share with him, even if that meant playing this little teasing game of hers. He smirked when she mentioned him acting sweet.
"So you caught on… I am trying to bribe you." Fyodor said, playfully.
"Oh... Are you? I wonder why..." She said, pulling lightly on the single strand of his hair that she was twirling around her finger.
"Are you going to let yourself get captured for the sake of some information again and then die by their hands again?" Anna asked, her eyes losing that gleam of playfulness in them.
Fyodor shifted around in their bed, as he sighed once more, and looked down at the small strand of his hair in her finger.
"I know you despise it whenever I do that…" Fyodor stated softly.
"I..."
Her eyes flickered up to his violet ones as she gulped. But she eventually ate her words, the complaints dying on her tongue. He did listen, but didn't care. Anna sometimes forgot she was in no position to criticise him for his plans, she had no say in that regard, her complaints didn't matter to him.
"Please… don’t apologize…" Fyodor whispered, tone deceivingly soft. He never liked seeing her upset.
"My worries are needless, right? I apologise." Her tone and vocabulary changed quickly. She shifted herself, getting off his chest and lying down on her side of the bed.
Anna let out a soft sigh, not bothering to turn around and face him.
The topic of his reckless behavior was a sensitive one for her, especially when he chose to disregard her worries for the sake of his own gains. He knew that she couldn’t do anything about it, and she knew that too. That’s why she would give up so easily. But she made these complaints anyway, because she couldn’t stand to see him put himself in danger. Her heart was always in the right place… But he didn’t need her worries, he never did.
"I just..."
"If I don't apologise, you'll tell me that I'm giving you an attitude, meddling with the things I don't understand." She whispered, trying not to come off as agitated.
She paused, deciding against saying thr words she wanted to say.
Fyodor listened to her words, as his gaze stayed on her back. He knew that the slightest bit of sarcasm would immediately get her to back off, the fact that she cared so much about his safety made her rather easy to pick apart and put down.
"You really do give me an attitude often, do you know that…" Fyodor mumbled, a small smirk formed on his lips as he thought to himself about how easily he could get a reaction out of her. He wasn’t proud of the fact that he liked making her worry... Okay, maybe just a tiny bit...
Her shadowy figure inhaled air, her chest rising and falling with an audible sigh.
"Whatever you say, dearest." Her voice was firm yet somber at the same time.
Eventually, Anna shifted in bed, now facing him.
"Guess I can be the plush toy that helps you ease your thoughts and fall asleep, hm?" She muttered, her whisper is a bittersweet symphony. But her eyes aren't bittersweet as she reached out to twirl a strand of his hair around her finger and watched with familiarity as his slick hair falls back into place, not even curling one bit.
Those whispers from her made his heart beat faster. She'd never said anything but the truth to him, but in this case, fyodor thought it was a little bit of an exaggeration on her part. She had been a lot more useful than that.
"Why yes, you have been of good use of helping me fall asleep. You’re very comfortable… and quite pleasing to look at, especially when you decide to lay closer to me." Fyodor teased as he looked down at her hand, watching as she fiddled with his hair.
She pulled at the strand, hard enough to make him wince.
"Oh... Am I now?"
She asked playfully, tilting her head to the side.
"I wonder... what could possibly make you think that way?"
She mumbled, arching her brow with faux wonder.
He had to keep himself from letting out a groan as she pulled at his hair so abruptly. Her tone seemed amused, in a way that he could barely pick up on. It was so subtle that he couldn’t tell if it was her genuine tone, or if she was just masking her actual feelings.
“Your beauty, of course…” He looked into her eyes as he spoke his response in a calm and casual tone, unphased by the tug she just gave him.
That wasn't the answer she wanted to hear, but she didn't let her face drop, she was grateful for his flattery and gave him a weak smile. Ruining the peace of the moment wasn't an option, she was enjoying it as well. Fyodor allowing himself to rest like this was a rare sight.
So she leaned in to kiss him while whispering:"I appreciate your sweet talk, darling..."
Part of him found her willingness to play along with him even though she could tell he was deflecting to be quite commendable, her ability to hold her ground and pretend was impressive. He smiled softly as he kissed her back, before whispering. "What if it was genuine this time?" Fyodor looked into her eyes, giving her a suggestive smirk as he watched her reaction closely, wondering how she would take that.
Anna went still for a second, eyes wide in momentary surprise. Then she let out a soft sigh before reaching out to undo the buttons on his shirt, the same one he wore to work that he hadn't bothered to take off.
"So you caught on this quick, huh?" She mumbled, her lips twitching into a coy smile.
"Can't say I'm surprised..."
She said, the smile lingering.
"So you really think you’re just a plush toy to help me fall asleep? Do you really think you’re that useless to me?"
Ah...
She had to stop herself from rolling her eyes at him. She sighed internally.
Of course, it was a matter of usefulness to him...
"No... I really don't."
But she brushed it all aside as she got down to the last button of his shirt, he sat up a bit and she slid it off of his shoulders, easing him out of it. The undershirt was much better, japan's humid weather was really bothersome.
"You know me by now…" He said, as he shifted around, trying to pull her closer to him.
.
.
.
40 notes · View notes
goatskickin · 2 years
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Some time ago, @namelesslibertad​ asked me how one would add tights to an outfit. 
And truly, it is not difficult at all to do, so I’ve made a little tutorial!
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First, we will need a mesh to work with. I am using Bloom’s quite ancient elder skirt, separated from this seasons outfit.
It’s a nice little mesh! However, if it were going to truly be a part of an Outerwear outfit, we should have some leg coverage, no?
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Once you have your clothing item in question in Bodyshop, and you have opened it in your Projects folder, we need to pay attention to the images files we have in front of us.
1 and 2 we don’t need to look at. This mesh is separated into groups, and the very first group is the boots. It’s the boots only and not the legs, so we do not need to mess with it.
If you want to know more about mesh groups aka subsets, @whattheskell​‘s tutorial HERE is essential. 
3 and 4 are what we want to look at. They are the TEXTURE of the legs and also the ALPHA of the legs. I’ll be saying the word ‘alpha’ a lot here, so if you do not know what that means: as mentioned in my tutorial about retexturing clay hair, the ‘alpha’ texture indicates where the texture should exist.
White means, “yes, texture”
Black means “no texture exists here”
Grey is in-between. Grey is what we want to work with; it’s how you can make sheer and semi-sheer tights.
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Now you might be saying, “How did you know that the image file with the skirt texture would also have the legs available, you know, the place where tights go?”.
Well, totally optional step; you can go ahead and export the UV map (with a program like UVMapper) to find this out. The lower half of the texture contains the legs. @digisims2​ explains this a little more right here. 
Please know that even TS3 and TS4 conversions, while being mapped very differently from TS2 meshes, will still have a base ‘body’ map in one of the images files. 
ALSO! When you open a clothing texture, you’re going to be limited to 1-4ish texture files to work with. So, you can just guess which one has the legs and undo undo if you are not correct. One of them has to have the legs texture! 
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Moving on!
The skirt texture: that’s where the tights texture has to go.
If you are putting tights on an outfit, you can really just fill in with one color and it looks fine! Most tights are just one color. You can get fancy if you want.
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Now for the alpha - you’re going to fill in 2 rectangles of white, grey or black here. The whiter, the more opaque. The blacker, the less opaque.
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If you’re totally lost - grab a UV map. You can see pretty clearly what is legs and what is feet.
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Clean it up, if you like! ‘
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Fully remove the feet even, if you’re worried that the tights will end up somewhere they should not.
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For the purposes of demonstration, let’s fill that all in with the brightest white you got.
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See? Tights! But very dark, very floodfill tights.
If you were going for leggings and if you had a nice texture, that all white alpha would be great! But, we are talking about hose, here.
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Also - we haven’t quite gotten all that we need covered. That white bit there is the sim’s skin. Not fashion.
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Let’s try a bigger section of alpha and a light grey this time.
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You may have to play around with the grey scale to get the right result.
Also, I’d highly recommend you test your project on skintones S1-S4 to make sure that the alpha you choose works for light and dark tones. It also helps to catch mistakes.
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This is a little better! The full leg is covered, and they are more sheer.
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You can go ahead and copy and save this UV map if you like, if you don’t want to mess around with SimPE or UVMapper or any of that jazz. Really does help if you’re lost about what goes where.
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See?
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Sinfully ugly texture though, haha.
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Not grandma’s best look - but helpful for explaining.
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Alright, let’s fill in that texture with something nice, a deep burgundy. 
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Oh, lovely! A little sheer but not too much.
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Hooray!
Let me know if you have any questions!
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urfavdarkskinn · 2 years
Text
Why Not
Jack Harlow x F! Brown reader
 Summary: Jack Harlow and his ‘close friend’ decide to do Golden Globes elevator but put a little twist to it 
 warning: kissing, small makeout session 
Note: I know Jack has nothing to do with tv shows but let’s just imagine that you and him were one of the main artists in some imaginary reality show 
You were currently one your phone, texting Urban about a show that the two of you had been watching while getting your makeup done. 
Your hair was finished a while ago so the woman doing your makeup was just about finished. 
You had been asked to attend the Golden Globes and literally had no clue what the directors had you being dressed in, so you prayed to God that it looked good on you. 
“Soo I heard that you’re Jack Harlow’s date for the evening.” One of the makeup artists, that you now knew as Nina, said. 
 You smiled slightly and spoke, “Yes but only because neither of us have dates and we’re friends so...” 
 She laughed slightly and shook her head, “Sure, let’s just ignore the way you two literally eye fuck each other every time you guys make eye contact.” 
 You gasped dramatically, “We do not!”
“Oh please that is such a lie! Even if it’s not eye fucking, the way he stares at you tells me that he likes you way more than a friend.” Nina said, while finishing your makeup. 
You raise your eyebrows before shaking your head slightly, trying not to mess up the makeup, 
“I wish! You’re really out here leading me on like this,” You say, with a fake hurt tone. 
 She scoffs while rolling her eyes playfully, “Trust me. When he sees you in your dress, he might literally pass out from being so in love.” 
 She pauses, putting her hands down, “On the side note, I’m done with your makeup so let’s get your dress!”  
 You quickly get up and follow behind her while she finds your dress. “Here it is. You ready to look like a goddess?” She asks with an excited smile. 
 You chuckle nervously, “Let’s hope so!” 
She quickly helps you into the tight, but beautiful, dress before you look at yourself in the mirror. 
It was a long, dark brown dress, that had a slit from your hip, down. 
The dress accentuated your torso and outlined your curves so nicely and you were so glad that the whole look came together. 
 You looked over and grabbed your phone when it buzzed and had seen that Jack sent you a message. 
It read, ‘I’m here, come outside’.
You sent back a thumbs up before quickly sliding on your heels and thanking the people that helped you with everything. 
They quickly ushered you out to make sure you weren’t late and you waved to them before walking out of the building. 
 You quickly moved your eyes around the area and saw Jack, leaning on his car, in a brown suit that looked amazing on him. 
 You two were practically matching and when he looked up, you swore your heart stopped.  
 There was just something about the way he looked at you and scanned your body that made you feel weak. 
 You quickly shook off the feeling and walked over to him with a smile. “Hi.” You spoke softly, your smile widening from his shocked reaction. 
 “Hey.” He paused, seemingly out of breath, “You look absolutely amazing.”
“Thanks, you look pretty good yourself.” You said while he stood up and opened the back door for you. 
 He laughed at your response and sat himself next to you while his driver started going to the ceremony. 
 The closer you got, the more nervous you were starting to feel and this had you starting to mess with your fingers, getting Jack’s attention. 
 He softly grabs your hands and looks at you, “Don’t be nervous, you got this.”
 You smiled at him softly and all of a sudden you felt the car stop, indicating that you had arrived. 
 You took a deep breath and looked over to Jack, “You ready?” you asked with a small smile. 
He nodded with a smile and moved to open the door before grabbing your hand and pulling you out with him. 
 The two of you moved to walk toward the carpet and were instantly met with flashes. 
You and Jack smiled, his hand never leaving your waist the whole time. 
Once you finally got out of the hoard of photographers and saying hello to everyone, you two met up with Urban. 
“Hey man!” Urban spoke with a smile while doing his handshake with Jack.
 “You two look great, the matching is on point!” He said making the three of you laugh. 
 “You look good to man, the gray fits with the hair.” Jack said with a smile. 
 “Shit thank you dude,” Urban said, wiping fake tears. 
 “Oh! I forgot to mention, one of the directors told me that they want the three of us to do that elevator thing that introduces us in a way.” He said. 
 Your eyebrows raised and you smiled. You loved the tiny skits people would do for the elevator scene. 
 “When do we need to go?” You said with excitement. 
 Urban looked at his watch and his eyebrows raised, “right now actually, follow me.” He turned around and we walked with him. 
 I looked up at Jack with a big smile, “what should we do for our skit? There are so many options!” 
 Jack smirked slightly, “I have an idea but it’ll be a surprise for you baby.” 
Your heart melted at the nickname and you nodded playfully rolling your eyes, “ugh fine then, don’t tell me.” 
He chuckled and his hand squeezed your hip, your heart practically leaping out of your chest. 
You finally came to the room and there were people there, waiting for you three. 
“Hey you guys thank you for being here!” One man said, shaking all of your hands. 
“So this is really easy you can do anything you want for this skit, it’s supposed to be funny so just go with it! Just listen to me saying ‘action’ because after that the doors will open, showing the three of you. Alright? Okay good!” 
The man clapped his hands making the three of you go inside the elevator.
Once the doors closed Urban asked, “So what are we gonna do?” 
You shrugged your shoulders while Jack grinned and whispered in Urban’s ear making him laugh. 
“That’s pretty good man!” Urban said with a laugh. 
“Yep and you know what to do?” Jack asked making Urban nod. 
Jack turned back to you and asked, “Do you trust me?” 
You raised and eyebrow and slowly nodded. 
He walked forward until your back was against the wall, and you had to look up at him. 
You heard the man yell “Action!” And Jack leaned down placing his lips onto yours. 
Your eyebrows went up but you quickly kissed him back, your hands moving up to his hair. 
His right hand moved to your backside while the left moved to the underside of your thigh. 
He lifted your leg up, and moved his body somehow closer to you. 
You almost forgot where you were before Jack pulled away, grabbing your hand and taking you out of the elevator. 
When the shooting ended, they let you see the video. 
You watched as the doors opened, showing you and Jack in a heated makeout session while Urban moved from the side of the elevator and rolled his eyes. 
He shook his head while looking at the two of you before walking out of the elevator. Soon after, the two of you followed him and the video ended. 
The three of you laughed, it was pretty good for three people that weren’t really known for doing these things. 
 “You could be an actor Urban, that was amazing.” You said, laughing. 
 “That’s what I’m saying!” He said. 
You three walked out of the room after saying good bye to everyone. 
“I hope you know I loved that skit.” Jack said, smirking at you. 
You shyly looked down but looked up again when feeling Jacks movement stop. 
He grabbed your hips and pulled you to him, kissing your lips. 
You smiled into the kiss, putting your hands on the side of his face. He slowly pulled back, his face a few inches away from yours. 
“Would you wanna.. you know, be my girl?” He asked, searching your eyes for an answer. 
You smiled and shrugged, “Yea sure why not.” He laughed and kissed you again. 
note: This took like months to publish I had zero hope for this story but I finally finished it. This isn’t proofread at all so sorry if somethings incorrect here
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plaquerat · 2 months
Text
i can't help but feel like ive been ruined. i spent so many nights begging someone i was in love with to not kill themself, to not abandon me, to please please love me back. i was forced to swallow my religious trauma because any way i processed it was Wrong and if i prayed more, if i shut up about saints, if i believed harder that god was truly good i could help the person i was obsessed with. i stopped watching or reading things i liked because one time the person made a joke making fun of a piece of media that's known to be bad and if you do that that's the same as endorsing what that piece of media is about and that would take this person away from me.
i helped make a server with someone after we left a larger one. we brought people we knew in. i invited a few people from a dead one i was in for the same piece of media. it would be nice, i thought, if we could all hang out and post art and have fun in a smaller, safer space. i liked a character that was very unpopular in the fanbase. the movie for this piece of media came out recently. there was a really awful joke made about this character in it. it made me feel gross and it felt like something that character wouldn't say or do. it was a gag comedy piece, and i've been into comic books before. i was used to being able to go "hm, that's uncool. i don't like how the character was written in this, and i don't think it's really indicative or how the character is." this apparently isn't normal and i, a csa victim who was just barely piecing together my abuse, was made to feel like i was evil and a supporter of the very thing i was so hurt by. tone indicators blew up around the time this server was active. i had a very hard time with them, and i have a history of being talked down to and infantilized. i asked people not to use them with me, and explicitly said why. i got off work that night and got a dm from someone i considered a friend at the time telling me how shitty and ableist i am for feeling that way. that if i feel like im being infantilized, then it means i think anyone who needs them is a fucking idiot. i never said that at all. when i got upset over how i was being talked to i got told that see? this is why someone like YOU needs them? because im actually stupid and need to have my hand held and told how stupid i am. anything i did from this point was obviously malicious. if i liked anything i was stupid. if i posted that character i was still so attached to i was into pedophilia. that person i was so obsessed with was in here for a while and after they cut me off completely i wanted to wipe the server. it was pretty dead anyway. i wanted it done quietly. one of my supposed friends was besties with that person in here who loved to accuse me of horrible things. they told them and they drove me out because if i deleted a server they posted in once a month that was bad and wrong and who cares about anything involving me. so i left.
i was invited into a server by someone i was mutuals with. it was nice. people in there were friendly and some were actually excited to see me. the owner was someone who very much did have issues, but we all did. occasionally id say things without thinking and get nipped. oh my bad haha! ill try harder. and i did. there were five vent channels and one was angry and involving things that upset us morally. i got really ovsessed with looking at accounts that posted things, triggering myself over and over. this was normal and good, the server owner believed. this person accused people of pedophilia on a fandom poll for voting on a character they liked and not this person's personal choice. my one irl friend's mom died when i was at work. on my break, i posted about it in shock, asking for support. when i got off work, i was being accused of making the server owner attempt suicide. when i floated the idea of commissions before moving, the server owner accused me of stealing customers from them. they had closed theirs earlier that day, after all. i couldnt post about anything if they had mentioned it to me. that was theft and i needed to credit them for everything. when i got into ghost, i said i liked how people would sexualize the papas. it was good, i thought, that older characters were being seen as attractive. the sevrer owner accused me of incest then, because my character i had made for ghost was related to these characters. i felt weird and gross talking about it with them around after that. i was told that at one point when i offhandedly mentiomed having a crush on someone, the server owner was convinced i meant them. in the end, the server owner cut the entire group off, and it turned out he was abusive to a lot of us. but people mentioned i seemed to get a very large chunk of it.
in tthe leadup to the ghost movie, i was so, so scared. i didn't know why. some horrible, evil part of my brain was telling me it was going to turn out copia was a pedophile. that was insane. that wouldn't happen, that's disgusting and evil and completely against what ghost is. but it had happened before with a character i liked. and what was one more comfort stolen away from me, an ontologically evil person. it didn't happen. obviously, it didn't and i was relieved. i still feel insane for even thinking it.
im trying to do better these days. i dont go out of my way to look at things that will trigger me if i can help it. im supposed to get into therapy more regularly now that ive moved again. most people i talk to now are supportive of me, understand that im kind of a freak and someone who has some very abnormal beliefs— and that its okay for me to have them. im not hurting people by worshipping lucifer. im not bad and wrong for being interested in saints and rituals. i know people that have had fears like mine because of similar events. im writing more than i used to, im talking about weirder ideas more. there is still fear, and there will be until i can have a decent way to work on it.
i really feel like a lot of this didn't need to happen in the first place, though. most things probably dont need to happen. they just do and im a very fundamentally messed up person for it now. oh well i guess. eventually ill stop crying before sleeping and immediately upon waking up.
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deeksblye · 1 year
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This is my very first time writing a fanfic and it's also my first time writing in english so please be nice :) I hope you guys enjoy reading it as much as I enjoyed writing it.
This dialogue is happening after episode 15S14 "The Other Shoe"
"Family is all that matters"
As they were leaving the boxe gym Kensi called Rosa, as promised, and told her that everything was fine and they were picking her up in 30 minutes.
As the three of them were entering the house Deeks cheerfully asked what they wanted for dinner.
"Ok so which one of my famous fancy dishes you ladies want today?"
"I actually was thinking about ordering some take out. It's been a very long day, we deserve it." Kensi responded.
"That sounds amazing. What about tacos, or chinese?" Deeks paused for a bit and then added enthusiastically: "Or we could order Rosa's favourite pizza."
Kensi looked thrilled about any of the options, which wasn't a surprise, but Rosa didn't seem to care. Actually it was at that moment that they realized that she had been oddly quiet ever since they picked her up.
"Hey Rose, is everything ok?" Deeks asked in a sweeter tone.
"Oh yes don't worry, I'm fine."
Kensi looked at Deeks with concern in her eyes and then asked "Are you sure? Cause you've been quiet ever since we picked you up."
"AND you didn't show any excitement when I mentioned your favourite pizza, which is definitely an indicator that something is off with you today." Then he added carefully "Come on sweetheart, talk to us. What's going on?"
"I'm just worried. First that woman showed up here covered in blood, and then that men was at the door and Kensi sent me to my room, but I saw that you were grabbing a gun." She said this last part redirecting her attention to Kensi.
The concern and fear in her voice as she spoke were impossible to hide which filled Kensi and Deeks with concern and angst for putting Rosa in that position. After everything she went through she deserved to have a normal and happy life. That was all they wanted for her, and they were doing everything in their power to grant her that, but some days like today they felt like they failed.
Kensi tried her best to calm her down right away "Oh no Rosa, you don't have to worry about that sweetie. That woman wasn't dangerous, we've known her for a few years and she just needed our help. About the men that showed up this afternoon…" Kensi paused for a few seconds, thinking carefully about her next words. "You were never in danger bacause I would never let that men get to you Rosa. Never. You will always be safe with us sweetheart."
"We will always do everything in our power to protect you, to make sure you're safe." Deeks added, his words were filled with love and compression.
Rosa turned her back to them and sat on the couch in a failed attempt to hide the tears that had started to form in her eyes. Kensi and Deeks followed her right away and sat with her, one in each of her sides.
"What else is concerning you?" Kensi asked.
Rosa paused for a few seconds while looking down and then finally let it out. "I know I'm safe around you two. It's not just me I'm worried about, I'm scared for you. I know your job is very dangerous and I don't want anything to happen to you two." She said it all very fast trying to control her emotions but at this point that task became impossible. Rosa started to cry, big tears rolling down her cheeks. Between sobs and looking at them she finally said "You're all I have, and I've already lost everything once. I can't lose you. I just can't."
Kensi and Deeks looked horrified for a few seconds, not knowing what to do or say. Finally Kensi wrapped her arm around Rosa's shoulders while Deeks grabbed her hand and gently touched her knee.
"Rosa baby… Nothing will happen to us, we're always very careful and we know how to take care of us. Besides, we're always looking out for each other." Kensi said in a lower tone, almost whispering.
Deeks finally looked less shocked and spoke "And, in the very unlikely hypothesis that something happens to both of us, you won't be alone. There are a lot of people that love and care for you like my mom and Julia, Callen and Sam. God even admiral Kilbride likes to spend time with you, and that's a huge thing coming from him."
"Exactly sweetheart, you have a family now. Deeks and I aren't the only ones looking out for you. You'll never be alone again Rosa, never. Do you understand?"
Rosa finally calmed down and dried the tears in her face using her sleeves and said with a weak smile "Yes, I know that. Thank you for calming me down."
This was all she needed to hear, she needed to know that she wasn't alone, she never would have to be alone and scared like before ever again, and in that moment she felt at peace.
Rosa laid her head in Kensi's shoulder who responded by holding her thight. Deeks held Rosa's hand and gently rubbed her back. She squeezed his and back in response.
They stayed like this for a few minutes, no one said anything bacuse there was no need. That room was filled with love and in that moment they felt like nothing else mattered. After a while Rosa spoke in a calm voice.
"I think I deserve that pizza now." And she finally showed her beautiful smile.
Kensi and Deeks smiled at her and Kensi gently kissed Rosa's head.
This was definitely all that mattered. Family was all that mattered.
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tenebraevesper · 2 years
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Sonic Cyber Revolution, Entry 17: The Challenge
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''Movin' at speed of sound (make tracks!)! Quickest hedgehog around! Got ourselves a situation; stuck in a new location without any explanation! No time for relaxation!''
– Gotta Go Fast by Sonic X
xXxXxXx
Sonic stretched his arms, placing them behind his head as he leaned against the couch, an empty bowl of cereal on the coffee table before him. It was morning, and him and Lucas decided to spend it by just chilling and watching TV, although Sonic was already making plans for the day. He felt that there was still a lot to do, a lot to explore, and the events from the past days made him even more eager to jump into the next adventure.
''Honestly, I'm really glad that we're not having to worry about Neos City getting destroyed. It looks like thing are returning to normal,'' Lucas noted as the news report came on. Sonic wagged his finger, giving Lucas a smug grin.
''I think this is only the calm before the storm,'' he replied. ''I'm sure the next adventure is already waiting ahead for us.''
''I gotta be honest, I was hoping to spend a day without excitement,'' Lucas replied. Sonic tilted his head.
''But, you were doing so well the past days,'' he said, elbowing Lucas. ''Com'n, it'll be fun to find something new to do.''
''You never run out of energy, do you?'' Lucas remarked, furrowing a brow, with Sonic just grinning back at him. ''You know, you could ask some of our other friends to join you. I'm sure they can keep up better with you than I do or are more willing to go on an adventure.''
''Probably, but I want you to participate as well. After all, you were my first friend I made here, and my partner,'' Sonic replied. Lucas smiled.
''I appreciate that sentiment,'' he said, briefly glancing at the news, which featured a segment on the popularity of the Buddy Bots. ''Looks like the Tamago Corporation really made a hit product.''
''It is kind of weird, though, seeing another ARNav as a robot,'' Sonic noted, as Midorikawa showed off Kero in his Buddy Bot form. The frog ARNav had a very similar appearance to his regular form, but there was a metallic shine to his body and his eyes looked empty, the only thing indicating that the Buddy Bot was controlled being the glow inside them.
''Well, unlike Irregulars, normal ARNavs cannot survive for too long outside AR Fields, so this is necessary for them to be at places where there are no AR Fields,'' Lucas noted, falling silent for a moment. ''I still wonder why that is so, though.''
''I kind of already accepted that this is how I am and that there's not much to think about it,'' Sonic replied, shrugging nonchalantly, then added in an encouraging tone, ''But, don't let that stop you from investigating.''
''You're just trying to get me out of the house,'' Lucas noted, folding his arms across his chest.
''Me? Oh, no, no… I would never force you out of your comfort zone,'' Sonic said, feigning innocence, then grinned mischievously. ''Did it work?''
Lucas sighed. ''Yeah, it did.''
''Nice,'' Sonic responded in a chipper tone, getting up. ''How about we go for a run around the city to see what's going on?''
''I guess we could,'' Lucas responded, shrugging, startled when Sonic just grabbed both of their bowls, zooming past him to place them in the dishwasher and sped back, placing his hand on his hip and tapping with his food on the ground impatiently.
''So, what are we waiting for?'' Sonic asked, with Lucas just rolling his eyes and following the blue hedgehog. ''Also, we could go for lunch later. Your treat!''
xXx
''Hey, you two! Looks like you're still hard at work.'' Warren and Tails looked up from their respective monitors, turning to Warren's mother as she entered the workshop, carrying a tray of cookies and drinks. ''I brought you two some snacks, since you two were both gone immediately after breakfast.''
''Thanks, Mrs. Taylor,'' Tails said, grabbing a mint chocolate chip cookie from the tray and eating it. Warren's mother then placed the tray on the desk next to the computer.
''Please, Tails, just call me Joanne or Jo for short. I had told you already that there's no need for formality and you told me to call you by your nickname as well,'' Joanne replied.
''Yeah, you did,'' Tails replied, smiling sheepishly, before grabbing another handful of mint chocolate chip cookies. His tails flicked as the cookie melted in his mouth. As for Joanne, she crossed her arms, tilting her head.
''It is still strange to see an ARNav eating food like this,'' she commented. Warren and Tails exchanged glances, both knowing what was going through the other's mind.
''Well, Tails is a special kind of ARNav,'' Warren said, turning to his mother. ''Some ARNavs don't need food and sleep, some apparently do. Tails is part of the other group.''
''Admittedly, you did tell me that when you introduced Tails to me,'' Joanne said, furrowing a brow as she eyed Tails, who gave her a nervous look, trying to hide it with a smile. Suddenly, Joanne hugged the twin-tailed fox, nuzzling his cheek. ''But you forgot to say just how cute he is! Absolutely adorable!''
''Hehe, thanks!'' Tails responded as Joanne let go of him. He had already forgotten just how fond Warren's mother was of him, a sudden memory of her gushing over his cuteness flashing in his mind when Warren introduced him to his parents.
''Not to mention, someone who also appreciates my cooking,'' Joanne added. ''If you want more mint chocolate chip cookies, just tell me and I'll make another batch.''
''Sure,'' Tails replied happily, imagining the small mountain of his favorite cookies lying before him. His tails flicked again and he turned to Joanne. ''Thank you for the food, Jo!''
''It's no problem,'' Joanna replied, turning her gaze to the computer. ''So, what are you two doing, if I may know?''
''Oh, we're just analyzing some data files and making a compilation for two of our friends,'' Warren replied.
''You mean Lucas and Sonic?''
''Actually, their names are Shadow and Touka,'' Tails replied. ''We kind of became friends with them recently.''
''I see,'' Joanne said. ''Well, then I won't bother you two anymore. Good luck with your work.''
''Thanks Mum!'' Warren replied as Joanne left the workshop, with him and Tails exchanging glances. ''Going by her reaction, if you wanted, you could weaponize your cuteness.''
''That's not actually a bad idea. I never thought that something like 'cuteness' could be used as a weapon,'' Tails replied, half-joking, only to remember something. ''Although, I think there was something Minami mentioned about using crocodile tears and a sob story to get out of trouble she caused for herself.''
''Minami is a complete menace, but I'm sure she would love to teach you how to do that,'' Warren replied wryly, remembering the story as well.
Minami had gloated to them how she had dragged Makoto into exploring an abandoned house, only for the two getting caught by a patrolling policeman right at the entrance. The moment the two realized they were in deep trouble, Minami broke out into tears, making up a story how she was distraught by the death of her pet cat who had to be put down just a day ago and still felt its spirit looming around, and she thought she saw it at the abandoned house. Makoto, who had quickly caught on her plan and pretended he was just worried about her and tried to stop her from going, noted how the policeman didn't seem to believe them at first, but he did appear to be moved by Minami's tears and story, and let them go with a warning to not do that again. The kicker? Minami never had a pet cat, since her father was allergic to cat hair.
Tails laughed, him and Warren continuing with their work. It was quite fascinating to sift through all the data they had found, especially since Shadow had told them that the computers were supposed to be wiped clean. Whoever did the cleaning apparently didn't do a good job, as there were still hidden files in the systems, some encrypted, but it wasn't anything he and Warren couldn't break through. However, there was something on Tails mind that had nothing to do with the task at hand.
''You know, it's really nice to see that your family has accepted me,'' he said, turning his gaze towards Warren.
''Well, you saw how Mum reacted to you, so there was no need for any convincing. As for Dad, he said that he was happy to see that I had met someone who shares the same interest as I do,'' Warren replied in an assuring tone. ''Honestly, it's a no-brainer that you would find a place here.''
''Right…'' Tails muttered, a grim memory of the kitsune ARNavs bullying him flashing in his mind, only to be quickly replaced by the memory of Sonic becoming very fond of him and pretty much adopting him as his ''little bro''. Tails then smiled, giving Warren a confident look. ''I wouldn't have it any other way.''
xXx
''Phew, we have finally managed to find it,'' Lily said as she and Knuckles entered a clearing, looking ahead of them. ''I'm surprised we haven't tried to visit Starlight Lake earlier, especially since it's one of Infinity Forest's more well-known places.''
''Are you already tired? The hike wasn't that long,'' Knuckles asked her, but Lily shook her head.
''No, I'm just relieved that we found it and… huh? Who's that?'' Lily looked over at the other side of the lake, spotting a figure sitting under a tree and squinting. Knuckles followed her gaze.
''Obviously, it is another visitor,'' he replied in a matter-of-fact tone. Lily placed her hands on her hips, looking at her partner.
''I had figured that much,'' she said. ''However, I don't think it's another human. Let's get closer.''
''Do your really want to disturb them?'' Knuckles asked, only for him to follow Lily as he walked away.
''We're just going to make ourselves known. If they want privacy, we'll go away,'' Lily replied as she walked around the lake towards the figure, with Knuckles dutifully following her. It didn't take Lily too long to realize that the figure wasn't indeed not a human, but actually someone she was familiar, with, even if only thanks to a certain video game.
''Uh, hello?'' Lily greeted the very large and burly anthropomorphic cat. The majority of his body fur was purple with dark violet stripes, and a striped pattern ran up his arms and long tail. White fur covered his chest, torso, muzzle, and inner ears, and he had black eyes with pale yellow sclera. He was wearing yellow gloves, sandals, and a matching belt with a gold buckle, and he was holding a fishing rod in his hands, clearly focused on fishing. Sitting next to him was a green frog with orange stripes. The cat glanced at them, a somewhat curious look on his expression.
''Hello,'' he said, waiting for a response.
''My name is Lily and this is Knuckles,'' Lily quickly introduced them.
''My name is Big and this is Froggy, my best friend,'' Big the Cat said, gesturing at the frog next to him. There was a moment of silence, with Lily and Knuckles exchanging a glance, well aware of what was on their partner's mind. There was no other explanation for Big and Froggy's appearance other than both being ARNavs. However, since there were no AR Fields anywhere close to Starlight Lake, this meant that the two had to be Irregulars. Non-aggressive ones, but Irregulars nontheless.
''So, what are you doing here?'' Lily asked curiously.
''Fishing,'' Big replied. Knuckles turned to Lily with a raised eyebrow, with Lily rolling her eyes as she understood his message, that being that it was obvious what Big was doing. Knuckles then turned to Big.
''Are there any fishes biting?'' he asked, deciding to keep the conversation going.
''Sometimes they do, sometimes they don't. It is always a surprise,'' Big replied, still staring ahead at the calm lake, before turning to the two. ''Do you want to join? I have spare fishing rods.''
Lily and Knuckles exchanged brief glances, then shrugged. They didn't really have anything else to do and they were curious about Big and Froggy, so they didn't mind staying here for a bit longer.
''Sure,'' Lily said as she and Knuckles sat next to him on the other side, with data particles appearing in Big's hands, forming into a pair of fishing rods and giving them to the two.
''Do you know how to fish?'' Big asked the two.
''Unfortunately, I haven't had the opportunity to hone that particular skill,'' Knuckles replied.
''Neither did I,'' Lily said.
''Don't worry, I'll teach you,'' Big told them.
xXx
''This is going to make a great addition to our room,'' Minami said happily, skipping along as she was holding a bag with cute decorations, like wall stickers in the shape of hearts and stars. ''I had been postponing the redecoration for ages. However, now that I have someone with an eye for detail and good taste when it comes to internal decoration, I can finally get things done.''
''Thank you for the compliment,'' Amy replied. ''However, your decoration choices weren't bad either. Although, I still don't understand what the plush tarantulas are for. I thought you were going for a cute aesthetic.''
''Oh, I wanted to plant those in strategic places to scare away anyone who might decide to snoop around my stuff,'' Minami explained. Amy gave her a sheepish smile.
''I guess I should've figured that one out,'' she said. While living with Minami, she had quickly learned that the teenager was incredibly fond of cute things, her room being filled with a bright and pastel color palette, yet at the same time, she had an incredible fascination with weird topics, like the occult and supernatural, urban legends, stories about cryptids, and so on. Sometimes, Amy felt like she was talking to a different person depending on the topic. Minami herself maintained a happy-go-lucky attitude, which could quickly change to being more cunning.
''So, your innocent self is just a facade, or am I missing something?'' Amy had asked her.
''Actually, this is who I am,'' Minami replied, winking at her. ''I have accepted that I have a light and a dark side, and I'm not letting anyone tell me how am I supposed to behave. If someone doesn't like me the way I am, then I don't care.''
Amy did appreciate that bit of wisdom, having to deal with constantly being shunned for her own intuitive abilities, with the rude comments really hurting her. After meeting Minami, she slowly started to work on accepting who she was, especially since Minami loved her fortunetelling skills and having fun speculating on what the fortune meant.
The two were currently walking through Erekiteru, passing by many humans and strange-looking ARNavs, at least until it clicked that they were looking at the new Buddy Bots, that had been finally made accessible to the public after constant advertisement.
''The Buddy Bots really took off, didn't they?'' Amy commented as they walked past an ARNav inside a Buddy Bot talking to their partner, glancing at Minami.
''I'm not surprised,'' she said. ''I'm sure ARNavs all over Neos City are relieved that they have a body they can inhabit without the fear of basically being deleted if an AR Field is shut down and they cannot reach another in time.''
''It really makes me feel sorry for them,'' Amy said, giving Minami a troubled look. ''All you have to do is be at a wrong place at a wrong time and you're erased out of existence.''
''True, but at the same time, you have to worry about being hunted down because you just exist,'' Minami noted, with Amy nodding, aware that Minami was referring to her existence as an Irregular. If anyone else outside her friend group learned that, she knew that she would've had to deal with the Hunters. Thanks to the modified AR Visor, she didn't have to worry that much, even sometimes forgetting what she was truly capable of.
xXx
Silver stuck his tongue out, focused on levitating the gardening tools with his psychokinesis. Considering how the botanical garden would need constant maintainence depending on the plant, there was always some kind of work to do. Makoto had told him how plants could also suffer from diseases and parasites and that if they spotted a rotting plant or strange growth, they needed to make sure it wouldn't spread. Silver was very eager to learn as much as possible, especially since he was working on growing his own small garden in a patch behind Makoto's house. Whether he would ever be able to take this knowledge to the future, he had no idea.
''I don't have any way to return,'' Silver muttered under his breath as he tried to untangle a garden hose with his psychokinesis. ''I don't even have any clue about the whereabouts of Ignis Infernalis, despite being thrown into the exact time where I should find some information.''
''Silver?''
''Aagh!'' Silver was startled, throwing all the tools up, causing them to fall on him. He was lucky the shears didn't land on him.
''Silver, are you all right?'' Makoto ran up to him, untangling him from the garden hose and helping him up.
''I'm fine,'' Silver replied, trying to sound as nonchalant as possible. ''You just surprised me, that's all.''
''Are you sure that there isn't something troubling you?'' Makoto asked. ''You have that look.''
''I guess I have to accept that I'm really bad at hiding how I feel,'' Silver replied dryly.
''It also helps that I know you well enough to figure out whenever there is something bothering you,'' Makoto replied, helping Silver pick the tools up. ''But, yeah, you aren't exactly the best at lying.'' A wry smile formed on his lips when he saw the downcast gaze Silver gave him. ''So, what's bothering you?''
''I was thinking about the future,'' Silver replied, a despair forming on his expression. Makoto gave him a sympathetic look. ''I should be searching for Ignis Infernalis, but I have no idea where it is or how it formed. What if the future gets destroyed because I failed in my mission? What if I miss something and the flames spread before they can be stopped? What if I'm the catalyst for the apocalypse?!''
''Silver, calm down,'' Makoto said, kneeling down to be at Silver's height. The panicked hedgehog looked at him. ''Take a deep breath in, then out.'' Silver did as he was told, but it did little to calm his racing heart. ''Listen, I understand that this is all very scary for you.''
''It-It's not! I'm just worried…'' Silver tried to defend himself, but it was obvious that Makoto wasn't buying any of this. He hated to admit it, but he lived with the fear of failure and it was eating him inside out. Silver sighed and sat down on the grass, with Makoto sitting next to him. Silver stared at the grass, stroking it with his hand. It was quite soft and he liked the scent. ''I wish I had some kind of answer for this, but I don't. Every time I think about what might happened in the future, be it next year, next month, next week, tomorrow, or even in the next hour; I feel as if I'm supposed to do something to prevent it from happening. But, I don't know what is going to happen. It's so frustrating!''
''I understand,'' Makoto replied, sympathetic to his plight and wondering how he could cheer him up. He hummed, looking up at the sky, only to smile as he leaned back on the grass. ''You know, Silver, the fear you feel is something I need to deal with every day.''
''Really?'' Silver asked, giving him a puzzling look.
''Yeah. For example, I often think what might happen if I cross the street at the wrong time and a car hits me. It is something that I can prevent by being careful, but a car might just speed through the red light and run me over,'' Makoto replied. ''However, while I will keep that possibility in mind, I still won't let it stop me from crossing the street.''
''I see, but I think that trying to prevent the apocalypse from happening is a much bigger deal,'' Silver replied. Makoto sat up, giving him an encouraging smile.
''I agree that it is, but what I want to say is that you shouldn't let your fears take over you. It will happen, one way or another, and while we don't know when, we know it will. The most we can do is prepare for it,'' he replied. ''You had already told me and the rest of Team Neos about it, so we can keep an eye out in case something strange happens. We also have Chaos Surge in case things get really bad.''
''You're right,'' Silver agreed, smiling back. ''I can rely on you and Sonic and the others for this. After all, we had already managed to stop one disaster from happening.'' He then crossed his legs, leaning forward and placing his head on his hands. ''There is something else that is bothering me, though. Remember those crystals we saw at Infinity Forest and later at Codex? We never learned what they were, besides the fact that they burned me and then shattered.''
''Honestly, I don't know. Those crystals are gone, and while we could ask Warren and Tails whether they know anything, I doubt that they have any useful information,'' Makoto replied. Silver gave him a look of concern.
''Is it possible that those crystals may have been a clue?'' he asked. ''I know that I'm sounding like a broken record, but I was still hoping to find something, anything that would indicate the presence of that flame.''
''I wish I knew,'' Makoto replied, with the two falling silent. After a minute or so passed, Silver looked up at his partner, a tiny smile forming on his lips.
''There really isn't any use in panicking over something I cannot control,'' he said. Makoto nodded in response, with Silver then getting up. ''Then, I will focus on the now. Com'n, we still need to bring those tools to the other side of Eden.''
''I'm right behind you!'' Makoto replied, getting up.
xXx
There was a knock on the hatch door, drawing Touka and Shadow's attention, who were in the middle of playing a video game, with Touka being the one who held the controller. The hatch then opened, with Kisaki climbing up.
''Hey, you two. Mind if I join you?'' she asked, a bright smile on her expression.
''Sure,'' Touka replied, shrugging as she paused the video game. ''Do you need anything?''
''I just wanted to check on how you two are doing,'' Kisaki replied, leaning against the couch and glancing at the computer. ''What video game are you playing?''
''It's called Sonic Adventure 2. Minami sent it along with a few other and told us that it is important that we play through them,'' Touka explained. She had to admit that, after getting over the initial weirdness that was seeing Shadow as one of the main characters in the game, they had a short debate on whether they would play through the Hero Story or the Dark Story first, with Shadow insisting on the Dark Story; for obvious reasons.
''I see…'' Kisaki hummed, before she realized something, raising an eyebrow as she looked at the two. ''Uh, who is Minami?''
''She is a fellow teammate,'' Shadow replied curtly, sitting cross-legged on Touka's bed.
''A fellow teammate…?'' It took Kisaki a moment for the words to sink in, but when they did, a wide smile spread across her expression. ''Don't tell me that you have found more friends besides Lucas and Sonic.''
''I'm not sure whether we can refer to them as our 'friends'. We're not that close,'' Shadow replied, grumbling under his breath, ''Even if that Hedgehog insists on it.''
''I guess it really doesn't matter how you call them as long as you get along,'' Kisaki noted. ''I had been worried about how you'd adjust to the situation, especially you, Shadow, and I wanted to give both of you some space. I'm really happy that you had found someone you can hang out with, and if you want to invite them over, you have my permission.''
''Honestly, I have no idea if that's ever going to happen,'' Touka said, while Shadow just glared back at Kisaki. Admittedly, while he did get along with the rest of Team Neos, especially Sonic, that still didn't mean he was all buddy-buddy with them.
''Well, if it does, I'd really like to get to know them. Lucas and Sonic appeared to be really nice,'' Kisaki replied, with her gaze falling. ''Also, I hope you two aren't mad at me for what happened…''
''Don't worry, we aren't mad at you,'' Touka replied, smirking. ''After all, if you hadn't taken me in, I wouldn't have reunited with Shadow.''
''Besides, what done is done. I'm not going to hold a grudge over this,'' Shadow added. Kisaki sighed in relief.
''That's good to hear,'' she said, glancing at the watch on her wrist. ''I'll have to go now to work, or else… Ah, right, I almost forgot to ask, do you two know about the Buddy Bots?''
''You mean those robots ARNavs can inhabit? Yeah, we saw a couple of them yesterday at the Solar Stadium,'' Touka replied. ''Why are you asking?''
''Well, the Tamago Corporation had been quite generous and donated a bunch of them to the hospital I work at for both the children and staff who are there,'' Kisaki replied, a teasing grin forming on her lips. ''I suppose you don't need one, Shadow.''
''I'm an Irregular, why would I need a robotic body?'' Shadow asked her in a deadpan tone, his eyes narrowing. Kisaki shrugged, trying to maintain an innocent look on her expression.
''You could consider it an upgrade,'' Touka said, grinning as she gave Shadow a knowing look. The latter just glared at her, his arms folded across his chest.
''That's not going to happen,'' Shadow replied, well aware that Touka was just teasing him. A smirk then formed on his lips. ''Besides, I'm certain that the one who needs an upgrade.''
''What is that supposed to mean?'' Touka felt a mix of confusion and irritation, her eyes narrowing as she stared at her little brother.
''I'm not saying anything. Figure it out by yourself,'' Shadow responded. Touka stared at him, wondering if he was mocking her.
''I will just leave you two then to your video game,'' Kisaki said, drawing their attention. ''Bye!''
As she exited through the hatch, she could hear the two responding, followed by Touka continuing the earlier conversation. She smiled, feeling glad that things have returned to being somewhat normal.
xXx
''Excuse me, Doctor, but I'm not really sure whether the announcement is completely necessary,'' Ferra said. She and Metal Sonic had been called to the Egg Base for a meeting. There, Eggman gave her a brief summary of his plans, and while Ferra understood fairly well what he was planning to do, she still was confused by a certain part of it. Eggman furrowed a brow as he looked at her. ''I mean, if you already want to take over Starpoint Area, wouldn't it be better to continue working from the shadows and leave everyone puzzled about what is going on.''
''It appears that you clearly don't understand my aesthetic,'' Eggman replied. ''It is out of utmost importance that everyone learns to fear the name Dr. Eggman.''
''It also seems to act as an ego boost,'' Ferra snarked, her comment making Orbot and Cubot, who were on the computers, snort in amusement, before quickly collecting themselves and focusing on their work when they saw Eggman glaring at them. Eggman then turned to Ferra.
''You are not wrong about that, but you had clearly missed the most important aspect of it,'' he said. Ferra had a feeling that he was talking down to her, but ignored it. After all, this was her life now. ''By announcing the Eggman Empire as an independent presence, I will draw attention away from the Tamago Corporation. No one will even suspect that it has any involvement in this plan, and I can continue using it as a cover as long as necessary.''
''Okay, I get it,'' Ferra replied. ''So, when do Metal and Sonic and I get to go out and do our part?''
''Soon enough,'' Eggman replied, only for the door behind them to suddenly open, with two figures walking inside. ''Finally! Do you have the program?''
''We do, Doctor.''
Ferra observed as one fo the figures, a 15-year-old teenage boy with brown eyes that had a slight red tint to them, and messy brown hair, walking up to Eggman, giving him an USB stick. He was wearing a black and purple light jacket with the sleeves rolled up to his elbows, a light blue and grey T-shirt and grey jeans. On the top of his head was a pair of sunglasses, the frames being greyish-green and the glasses being light green. He appeared to be quite confident, if not even cocky, judging by the grin on his lips.
Metal Sonic, on the other hand, set his gaze on the teenager's partner. The Irregular was a crystalline, anthropomorphic hedgehog in appearance, with no mouth, nose or even feet. Instead, his legs ended in a purplish mist. His eyes had a reddish-pink sclera and lime green irises, while his quills were bushy and ended in white tips. His hands and gloves were crystalline like his arms, with the fingers ending in white-tipped claws.
''Good,'' Eggman said, sounding quite pleased. ''Soon, we'll be able to set my plan into motion.''
While he walked back over to the main computer, the teenager and his partner turned to Ferra and Metal Sonic, who just glared back. They weren't happy to see the two, nor that they had to work with them as fellow Enforcers.
''Ferra Ahearn and Metal Sonic, I presume.'' The teenager and his crystalline partner walked (or floated, in the latter's case) up to the two. ''The name is Toshiro Miwa, and this is Mephiles the Dark.''
''But, you already know that,'' Mephiles added. ''After all, we had corresponded before.''
''I know that you two were the ones who set us up to release Shadow,'' Ferra growled, glaring daggers at the two. ''Why? He almost destroyed Starpoint Area.''
''Too bad he didn't,'' Mephiles replied.
''What are you two talking about?'' Ferra hissed. ''Did you two seriously want Shadow to blow up the entirety of Neos City?''
''What do you think?'' Toshiro asked back instead of answering. Ferra shivered, stunned by his calm and surprisingly nonchalant tone. It was clear to her that these two were dangerous, but she had to wonder just how far did this rabbit hole go.
''Fine. Why did you tell me and Metal to awaken Shadow?'' Ferra asked. ''How do you even know about him?''
''You two consider yourselves Sonic and Lucas' rivals, correct?'' Mephiles asked. Ferra and Metal Sonic nodded. ''The same goes for me and Toshiro and Shadow and Touka. Our goal is to destroy both of them, but not before we make them suffer as much as possible.''
''You still haven't told us why you'd do that,'' Ferra noted.
''So we could ruin the surprise?'' Toshiro asked, smirking deviously.
''What surprise?'' Ferra asked, now agitated. Neither Toshiro nor Mephiles answered, as their attention was drawn to Eggman, who had managed to hack into every device accessible in Neos City.
''Everything is ready, Boss. You have full access to all broadcasting devices across Neos City,'' Orbot said.
''Splendid! Now, I can finally set my plan into motion,'' Eggman said, pressing a button.
xXx
''I can't believe they didn't have any chili dogs for sale,'' Sonic grumbled, holding a half-eaten calzone in his hand. He and Lucas were sitting on a bench, having lunch. ''What has this world come to?''
Lucas laughed, almost chocking on his own calzone. ''Out of all things to get upset about, you complain about food.''
''Why wouldn't I? I'm sure that you would also be annoyed if you learned that they sold out your favorite potato chips,'' Sonic replied.
''Yeah, you're right about that,'' Lucas agreed, nodding along. However, their moment of fun didn't last, as the holographic screen on the nearby building, that would usually show the time and temperature, started crackling and glitching, being replaced by a video feed of a bald man in a red jacket, bushy mustache and blue glasses.
''Attention, citizens of Neos City! My name is Dr. Eggman, the world's greatest scientist, and soon to be the world's greatest ruler! You have been chosen to witness the beginning of the greatest empire of all time! My virus has already taken over every single robot in this city, and anyone who dares to oppose me will meet their demise! Therefore, don't bother with any kind of resistance!''
The video feed then glitched again and was shut down. Lucas and Sonic, who had gotten up, stared at the broadcast in shock, then exchanged glances. However, before either of them could say anything, the Buddy Bots that were close by suddenly started to attack the people close to them, their eyes now glowing a haunting red.
Links:
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#Sonic Cyber Revolution (Masterlist)
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spacedykez · 2 years
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moss's boundaries
gendered terms: any and all are fine unless specified otherwise and it is usually safe to assume I'm fine with anything, however do NOT refer to me with the word "woman." any other feminine terms are fine and percieving me as feminine is fine, just that word in specific, thank you.
do not refer to me as your parent. even as a joke. it makes me very uncomfortable and i do not like it. i am not your mom/dad/parent, even jokingly. don't refer to me as such
this isn't a hard boundary, but if you can please try to use tone indicators!! this mostly applies to when you're making a joke that could easily be interpreted as hate/negativity. i won't block you over not using tone indicators, and i can usually tell when you're joking (i'm usually joking or being silly! i joke around a lot too)! just use good judgement :D i do not reblog fundraisers, aid posts, politics, or news. Ever. I do not want to talk about politics (i mean, I guess I would have a polite discussion, maybe, if you were nice about it? My views are basically all human beings deserve human rights which. absolutely radical, right? /sar. apparently it is in today’s world). but anyways no i don’t want to talk about politics and i would feel bad reblogging some aid posts but not others + i couldn’t donate anyways (minor, and all) so i will reblog none. and don’t ask me to
playful flirting is fine with me!! in fact, it is encouraged. i will commit to bits with you at a moment's notice. similarly, lighthearted sex jokes are totally fine. but do NOT send me nsfw/explicit things EVER. i'm pretty sure the one time this happened it was a bot but just. in case.
this hasn't ever come up online, but don't tease me about forgetting things. if I make the joke, it's fine to laugh about it, but don't make it a big thing and don't be mean about it. and don't try to purposefully mess with me by lying about something I did or didn't do. just. do not be mean about me forgetting things.
you can 100% make content based on any of my fics/ideas!! and please do tag me in them so i can see what you make?
like/reblog sprees of my posts are not only accepted but encouraged!! please leave me some deranged tags maybe? i welcome deranged asks and reblogs. or not-deranged asks and reblogs. just asks and reblogs in general really. please interact with me. all likes, reblogs, asks, and tags are a-ok!! tag me in things!! tag me in otters!! i love being tagged in things!!
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fluffymiyaa · 5 months
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Waste The Night
Painting!Gojo x Painter!reader x Painting!Geto
Summary: In a haunting twist of fate, your tragic painting suddenly springs to life, its sorrowful characters and somber scenes manifesting before your eyes.
3 4 5
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You decide to start your morning by making breakfast. Just a simple omelet and a nice, hot cup of coffee. You eat it quietly, enjoying your morning routine as you watch TV. Then suddenly, there's a knock at your door. You furrow your brow, wondering who could be visiting your house this early in the morning.
You quickly finish up your nearly-done omelette and rush to the window, trying to discreetly peek outside. Your eyes widen in shock, and your body starts shaking when you see the police car parked outside your house. The sight sends a wave of fear and confusion coursing through you.
What? What's going on? What happened? What did i do?
Your mind races with a thousand questions as you approach the door, each step heavy with apprehension. What could have prompted the police to come to your house? You rack your brain, trying to recall if you've done anything that might warrant their attention, but nothing comes to mind. Your pulse quickens as you reach for the doorknob, your hand trembling slightly. With a mixture of fear and determination, you twist the knob and swing the door open, bracing yourself for whatever awaits on the other side.
You face the two police officers, their stern expressions sending a shiver down your spine. Your heart races as you try to maintain your composure.
"...can I help you, sir?" you manage to stammer out, your voice trembling with apprehension.
"Ms. L/N Y/N, correct?" One of them addresses you, his tone serious and probing.
"Y-yes, that's me..." you reply, the words barely escaping your lips as you struggle to keep your voice steady.
The two police officers glance at each other, a silent exchange passing between them. One of them retrieves something from behind his back, and your eyes widen as he holds up your phone. How could you not have realized your phone was missing? Your furrow your brow in confusion, wondering how they came to possess it.
"Huh...yes, that's mine...but how?" you manage to ask, your voice tinged with uncertainty and concern.
"Miss, please come with us to the police station." one of the officers replies, his tone firm yet respectful.
"What? No! I didn't even do anything!" you protest, your heart racing as panic begins to set in.
The officers sigh, their expressions sympathetic yet resolute as they try to maintain control of the situation. They show you a picture of a familiar old man - your manager.
"Do you know this man?" they ask, their eyes searching yours for any sign of recognition.
You gulp, feeling a lump form in your throat as you nod in acknowledgment.
"Yes...he's my manager." you admit, your voice barely above a whisper.
The officers nod, their demeanor becoming more serious as they continue to speak.
"He was found dead in the hallway just 50 meters from here. There was a long, sharp cut on his neck, indicating that someone had slashed his throat. Based on the condition of the body, it is estimated that the incident occurred in the middle of the night or early morning, as the body was still quite warm when it was discovered. We have called an ambulance to take him to the hospital, and we are currently trying to contact his family, including you." they explain, their words weighing heavily on you.
"So what I'm saying is, miss, you are the first suspect in this case. The last time the victim had contact was with you." they conclude, their gaze unwavering as they hold up your phone as evidence.
Your mind races with disbelief and fear as you try to process the gravity of the situation unfolding before you.
You freeze in place, a wave of shock washing over you, followed by a surge of panic that leaves you sweating and trembling. Your breath comes in ragged gasps, and tears threaten to spill from your eyes as you struggle to comprehend the situation unfolding before you.
"W-wait, there must be a misunderstanding! I-I didn't have the phone with me! Someone must have stolen it from me! Please, you need to trust me! I'm innocent! Somebody must have framed me!" you stammer, your voice trembling with desperation and fear.
The officers exchange a glance, their expressions unreadable as they listen to your frantic pleas. Yet, despite your protests, their demeanor remains stoic and unwavering, their duty to uphold the law evident in their unwavering resolve.
"Save that explanation at the police station, miss," one of the officers responds sternly, his tone leaving no room for argument.
With a heavy heart and a sense of dread gnawing at your insides, you nod weakly, realizing that you have no choice but to comply. The weight of the situation presses down on you like a suffocating blanket, leaving you feeling helpless and vulnerable.
You take a deep breath and follow the officers as they lead you towards their patrol car, your mind racing with unanswered questions and fears of what may await you at the police station.
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Your gaze shifts to the handcuffs encircling your wrist, a stark contrast against the soft fabric of your pajamas. These hands, once so adept at wielding a paintbrush with grace and precision, now rendered powerless and confined.
Alone in this sterile white room, the silence weighs heavily upon you, broken only by the rhythmic whirring of the fan above. Each breath feels labored, as if the air itself has grown thick with uncertainty and fear.
The door creaks open. A figure steps into the room, their footsteps echoing against the sterile white walls.
It's a detective, clad in a crisp suit with a stern expression etched onto his face. His presence alone sends a shiver down your spine, amplifying the feeling of unease that has settled over you like a suffocating fog.
"Miss Y/n, good morning" he says, gesturing towards the lone chair positioned in the center of the room.
Oh yeah what a good morning
You comply silently, the handcuffs rattling as you move, a constant reminder of your current predicament. Sitting down, you feel small and vulnerable under the detective's scrutinizing gaze.
He takes a seat across from you, opening a file with your name written on it in bold letters. His eyes flicker over the contents before fixing on you once more.
"We have some questions for you regarding the events of last night," he begins, his voice firm yet measured.
You nod slowly, your heart hammering in your chest as the gravity of the situation sinks in. This is far from the peaceful morning you had envisioned, and you can't shake the feeling that your life is about to change in ways you never imagined.
"Where were you last night?"
The officer's gaze remains fixed on you, probing for any signs of deception or evasion in your responses. You swallow hard, the weight of his scrutiny bearing down on you like a heavy burden.
"I was sleeping, in my room." you reply, betraying the nervousness that grips you.
He nods slowly, jotting down notes on a pad of paper as you speak. The scratching sound seems to echo loudly in the otherwise quiet room.
"How do you feel about him being your manager?" he inquires, his tone measured yet insistent.
You hesitate, searching for the right words to convey the mix of emotions swirling within you. "He... uhm, he's good at his job," you finally manage, the words sounding hollow even to your own ears.
The furrow in the officer's brow deepens as he continues to study you intently. "Ms. L/n, does your manager ever mistreat you?" he presses, his voice taking on a more serious undertone.
Your mind races, recalling the countless arguments and disagreements that have punctuated your working relationship with the now-deceased manager. "Well... it's just normal arguments," you offer hesitantly, attempting to downplay the significance of your conflicts.
But the officer doesn't seem convinced, his scrutiny unwavering. "Do you have any feelings of hatred towards him?" he probes further, his gaze piercing through your defenses.
Your heart pounds in your chest as you grapple with the weight of his question. "N-no... not at all," you stammer, though a nagging doubt lingers at the back of your mind.
"Ms. L/n, I need you to answer the question truthfully," the officer presses, his tone firm yet not unkind.
Your hands tremble slightly as you respond, the weight of the interrogation bearing down on you.
"I do" you admit
The officer's gaze remains steady, his eyes searching yours for any hint of deception. "Do you know if he engaged in inappropriate behavior, such as harassment towards someone else?" he asks, his voice soft yet probing.
You shift uncomfortably in your seat, struggling to find the right words amidst the chaos of your thoughts. "W-well, he has a bad temper," you offer tentatively. "I think he may have had a lot of enemies."
"Enemies, huh? Does that include you, miss?" the officer inquires, his voice taking on a more serious tone.
Your heart pounds in your chest as you meet his gaze, the weight of his question hanging heavy in the air. "No!" you exclaim, a surge of frustration and desperation rising within you. "I told you, I have nothing to do with this! Somebody else must be trying to frame me!"
The officer raises a hand in a calming gesture, his expression remaining composed despite your outburst. "Please, Ms. L/n, I understand that this is a difficult situation, but I need you to remain calm and lower your voice." he advises, adjusting his glasses with a practiced motion.
You take a deep breath, attempting to steady your nerves as you nod in acknowledgment. Despite your fear and uncertainty, you know that maintaining your composure is crucial if you hope to convince the officer of your innocence.
"Do you perhaps know somebody else who harbors ill feelings towards your manager?" the officer probes further.
Your mind races as you consider the question, recalling the various individuals who had clashed with your manager over the years. "Uh... I have some people in mind," you admit hesitantly, careful not to implicate anyone unfairly.
The officer nods, gesturing for you to continue. "Can you say their names?" he prompts, his voice calm yet insistent.
You take a deep breath, steeling yourself before naming those who had openly expressed their dislike for your manager and had been heard saying disparaging remarks about him.
"Are any of them aware of your security password?" the officer inquires, his brow furrowing in thought.
"Hm... Miko? She's one of the closest to me," you respond, your mind racing as you try to recall if you had ever shared your password with her. "But I never thought she's the one who stole my phone..."
The officer nods, jotting down notes in his book before closing it. He rises from his chair, his posture professional yet empathetic. "I think that's it for today. You can go home," he informs you, his voice carrying a sense of finality. "But you must remember, you're still a suspect. The police will continue to monitor you."
As he walks towards the door, he pauses, turning back to face you with a somber expression. "Oh, and I think you might need a lawyer." he adds, his words hanging heavily in the air as he exits the room, leaving you alone with your thoughts and the weight of uncertainty pressing down upon you.
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As you step back into your house, a wave of exhaustion washes over you, leaving your body feeling heavy and your limbs weak. You can hardly muster the energy to move, let alone eat. Your appetite seems to have vanished, replaced by a gnawing feeling of anxiety that weighs heavily on your mind.
Collapsing onto the nearest chair, you curl up into a ball, seeking solace in the silence of your empty house. The minutes tick by slowly, each passing moment adding to the weight of the burden you carry. You glance at the clock, its hands seemingly frozen in time, mocking your sense of helplessness as they stubbornly refuse to move.
As you sit there, the weight of the situation pressing heavily on your shoulders, you feel a surge of panic rising within you. The thought of finding a lawyer seems like an impossible task, especially considering the overwhelming number of options and the uncertainty of who you can trust. The exorbitant costs associated with legal representation only add to your distress, leaving you feeling trapped and helpless.
Tears well up in your eyes as you struggle to comprehend why this is happening to you. You've always tried to live your life with integrity and honesty, yet now you find yourself thrust into a nightmare of accusations and suspicion. It feels unfair, unjust, as if the world is conspiring against you for reasons beyond your understanding.
You bite your lip, trying to stifle the sobs that threaten to escape your throat. The weight of uncertainty and fear bears down on you, making it difficult to see a way out of this predicament.
"What should i do..? Why is this happening to me?"
You cry until exhaustion overwhelms you, and you don't even notice as you drift into sleep, your head resting on the table. Once you slowly wake up, your body jolting in panic as you glance at the clock.
"Shit, how long have I been asleep?"
It's already 3 pm. Feeling too restless to eat, you grab a pudding from the fridge and quickly devour it. Then, you make your way upstairs to your studio.
As you enter the room, your eyes land on the paintings of Suguru and Satoru on their canvases. You long for their comforting presence right now. Absentmindedly, you pick up a brush and examine it, lost in thought.
Suddenly, a light bulb seems to illuminate above your head. An idea forms in your mind.
"Wait, if I can't find a lawyer, maybe I can just make one?"
You chuckle at the absurdity of the thought, imagining crafting your own lawyer from brush, paint, and canvas.
But then you pause, considering the idea more seriously.
"...I mean, it's not a bad idea. And I wouldn't have to pay him or anything, right?"
Lost in contemplation, you sit in silence, the idea lingering in your mind as a potential solution to your current predicament.
"God..im gonna get real in jail if they find out it's a fake lawyer."
Your hand slowly dances on the canvas, skillfully shaping the figure as you contemplate what personality to imbue him with.
With each stroke of the brush, you pour your passion and determination into creating this imaginary legal representative. Despite the absurdity of the situation, your focus is unwavering. After all, you refuse to entertain the thought of ending up in jail.
As the painting begins to take form, you infuse it with characteristics that you believe a trustworthy lawyer should possess: intelligence, confidence, and a hint of charisma. With each brushstroke, you mold him into the ideal representation of legal expertise and competence.
In your mind, this painted lawyer becomes more than just a creation on canvas. He becomes your lifeline, your protector against the unjust accusations looming over you. And as you continue to paint, you feel a sense of empowerment wash over you, knowing that you are taking control of your own destiny, one brushstroke at a time. You drop your brush and let out a satisfied groan as you admire your creation. The image of the lawyer stares back at you from the canvas, exuding an aura of confidence and intelligence.
"Ah..i end up making him good looking. Well, what's the harm anyway." you mumble to yourself, a faint smile playing on your lips.
Stretching your tired muscles, you take a moment to appreciate the sense of accomplishment that comes with bringing your idea to life. Despite the unconventional circumstances, you can't help but feel a sense of pride in your artwork.
With a deep breath, you remind yourself that desperate times call for creative solutions. And if your painted lawyer can help you navigate through this legal ordeal, then his good looks are just an added bonus.
Feeling a surge of determination, you gather your resolve to face whatever challenges lie ahead, knowing that you now have a unique ally on your side, even if he exists only in paint and imagination.
"Now the problem is..i don't know when he's gonna become real!" You cried out, frustration evident in your voice.
"Please please become real in the morning till evening! Not in the night please please please!" You beg in front of your painting, your desperation palpable.
What a scene it must be, if somebody else were to find you in this position—on your knees, pleading with a two-dimensional figure. They would undoubtedly be puzzled, perhaps even weirded out by the sight.
But you don't care about appearances right now. All that matters is finding a way to ensure your painted lawyer materializes at a time that's most advantageous for you. So you continue to beseech, your words echoing in the quiet of your studio, hoping against hope that somehow, your plea will be heard and answered.
"What are you doing?" You hear someone's voice, and as you turn around, you see Suguru looking at you with a puzzled expression, while Satoru regards you with a mixture of concern and pity.
"Oh no..is she losing her mind?" Satoru expresses his worry, his brow furrowing.
"I think she is." Suguru agrees, his tone tinged with a hint of amusement.
You flush with embarrassment, realizing how bizarre your actions must appear to them. But you don't know how to explain yourself, especially considering the circumstances. All you can do is hope they won't judge you too harshly for your desperate attempt to summon a painted lawyer to aid in your defense.
You quickly get up, trying to conceal the painting behind your body, although it's barely covered.
"You guys are surprising me! Don't show up like that!" you exclaim, feeling caught off guard.
"And so are you. Besides, why are you hiding it behind you? The canvas is way bigger than you." Suguru remarks, his eyes glinting mischievously.
Satoru takes hold of your wrist, his expression one of curiosity mixed with concern.
"What are you trying to hide from me?" he asks, his tone gentle yet probing.
You glance between them, feeling a flush of embarrassment creeping up your neck. How do you explain the bizarre situation you've found yourself in?
Satoru gently pushes you aside to get a better look at the canvas. His eyes widen in surprise as he takes in the figure of another man painted on the canvas. A pang of unease and hurt tightens his chest.
Suguru narrows his eyes, studying the scene with intensity.
"What's the meaning of this? Explain." he demands, his tone icy.
"Are you cheating on us? Are we not good enough for you?" Satoru's voice trembles with a mix of hurt and confusion as he confronts you.
You feel a lump form in your throat as you try to find the words to explain
"Wait, no! I can explain! Please, hear me out! I-I need him!" you plead desperately, feeling the weight of guilt and fear pressing down on you.
"You don't need us anymore?" Satoru's voice cracks with hurt and confusion.
"N-no! T-that's not it! P-please, I just..." Your throat feels dry, your breaths coming in shallow gasps as you struggle to speak. It's all too much, the overwhelming weight of everything that's happened crashing down only in one day.
You break down into sobs, unable to contain the flood of emotions any longer.
Satoru and Suguru rush to your side, their faces filled with concern and apology as they try to comfort you.
"I'm sorry, y/n... Please, just take a breath," Satoru says, squeezing your hands tightly in his.
"Hey, calm down." Suguru murmurs soothingly, gently stroking your cheek in an attempt to calm your trembling.
"Let's talk about this calmly," Suguru interjects, his voice steady despite the tension in the room. He takes a step closer, his eyes soft with concern. "Y/n, we're here for you. Just explain to us what's going on."
Satoru nods, his expression a mix of worry and understanding. "Yeah, we're not going anywhere. You can tell us anything."
You take a shaky breath, trying to compose yourself enough to explain. "I... I made him because... because I didn't know what else to do. I'm in trouble, guys. The police came to my house today... they think I had something to do with my manager's death."
Suguru and Satoru freeze in dread as news of the police's arrival sinks in, a heavy silence enveloping the room. That night, driven by uncontrollable impulses, they acted rashly, blinded by a desire for vengeance. Unbeknownst to them, their actions inadvertently shifted blame onto you, leaving you to bear the weight of their mistake.
As tears continue to stream down your face, they exchange guilt-ridden glances, debating if they should tell you or not.
"Wait a second, Y/n." Suguru interjects, his voice tinged with urgency.
They step away from you, huddling in a corner, frustration evident on Satoru's face.
"What are we going to do?" he mutters in frustration, his mind racing for a solution.
Suguru closes his eyes, grappling with the weight of their actions.
"This is on me. I should have been more professional, ive been doing this for years but my recklessness led to this. I dont know what makes me so uncontrolled that night." he admits, a heavy sigh escaping his lips.
Because it was you.
Satoru look at you who still slump down on the cold floor. He cant seeing you like this it hurts him.
And so Suguru, he put you in danger and he was behind all of this.
"It's not just your fault. We did this to protect her, but we've only made things worse." he insists, his voice filled with remorse.
"We need to clean this for real this time." Suguru agrees, determination flickering in his eyes. Satoru turns to you, resolve in his gaze.
"I'm going to tell her," he declares.
"Wait what?"
Satoru turns back to you, steeling himself for the inevitable confession.
"Y/n... we..." Satoru begins hesitantly, but Suguru interrupts, his voice strained with uncertainty.
"Satoru, don't." Suguru stopped him.
"But i can't lie to her!"
Suguru exhales heavily, rubbing the bridge of his nose in frustration, his eyes filled with remorse.
"Fine."
With a heavy heart, they turn to you, their expressions fraught with sorrow.
"W-what is it?"
"Y/n... we're the one who killed your manager" Satoru confesses, the weight of his words hanging heavily in the air.
The revelation hits you like a sledgehammer, sending shockwaves through your entire being, leaving you feeling as though the ground has been pulled out from beneath you.
"H-huh?"
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Ik this isnt make sense, lets just pretend theres no cctv or they managed to avoid them im literally so dumb😮‍💨
Thanks for the notes, reblogs make me feel more appreaciated<3
Tags: @ceramic-raven @beastofthetrees @r0ckst4rjk @gothiccwhore666 @barryatsumu
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WELCOME ABOARD THE TRAIN!!
>> Greetings, passengers! I'm Donatello, your humble train captain (though you can just call me Don)!! Your safety and enjoyment is my number one concern, so please make sure you keep all of your belongings secure and be mindful of other passengers!
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⚠️ DNI ⚠️
tcest, incest, proshippers, racists, homophobes, transphobes, ableists, misogynists, and any other mean weirdos
Art requests: CLOSED!!
Please don’t ask if my requests or commissions are open. They aren’t. And I don’t plan to open them any time soon. I’m a self-indulgent artist who draws what he wants, and I’d like to keep it that way.
Rules when boarding the train
I make suggestive jokes (I'm a teen. What dost thou expect of me), but I won't be drawing NFSW, nor will I accept me or other minors being sexualized. We are not child molesters.
Please be nice! I'm not exactly the best at wording things (tone indicators save my life), but I will never, EVER be mean to someone on purpose (unless they deserve it. Then I'll go ham). While interacting on my blog, please refrain from being toxic. Some thoughts are better left to yourself
NO STEALING MY ART!! I don't know why you'd want to steal it in the first place (it sucks ass), but don't do it anyways. You can use it as long as you give credit.
I don't do commissions, but I take requests! If I see something in my ask box I like, I'll draw it. So, if you have any ideas, feel free to share them! I like having motivation boosters.
Don't.... don't try to flirt with me........ I'm taken....... I won't accept... guys please..... I know I'm hot but like.... please........ I'm also a minor....... guys..... 😞
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Look upon the conductor's wonderous glory!! ✨ The conductor's fav jammy jams!! 🎶 What to call the conductor!! 🐠 The conductor's original turtle iteration!! 🦈 The conductor's beloved silly characters!! 🫧
The conductor's family!!
#atomic bomb [⚛️🧪] - @atomic-rattz (Lil bro!!)
#Nebula [⭐️♠️]- @splatting-stampede (Big sis!!)
#insufferable twink 🧡 - @rawcherrycake (Mi esposo <333)
#cassette tape 📼 - @cin3maa (Lil sis!!)
#Glitter Gloop [🫐✨] - @sourfunstrips (Big bro!!)
#eepy tello 💤 - @mrsleepytello (Lil sib!!)
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saintlike78 · 3 years
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Tough love [Poly Marauders]
A/N: Thank you so much for all the love on my previous poly Marauders, it really means a lot! I’ve just been obsessing over poly Marauders fics recently and it had inspired me so much, so I really hope you love this as much as I do. Feedback is always appreciated!
Pairings: Poly! Marauders x Fem! Non-Gryffindor! Reader
Words: 3.3k
Summary: Your “newly” established poly relationship with the three Marauders has you feeling many emotions. Sirius has always been one for though love and doesn’t often let his emotions show. In the start of your relationship, you have a hard time reading him and you think he doesn’t really like you and only is in the relationship because he wants to be the two other Marauders and you’re the catch/con that comes along.
Warnings: NSFW 16+, vaginal sex, oral (male receiving), fingering, unprotected sex, mention of cum, praise kink, degradation, one singular spank, polyamorous relationship, soft dom! Remus, soft dom! James, dom! Sirius, Sirius being mean, mention of food, light angst to fluff, as always let me know if I missed anything.'
The sun was shining brightly through the windows of the great hall. You were sitting at the Gryffindor table with your three new boyfriends. Remus and Sirius were across from you and James beside you, with a hand on your thigh, never wanting to not be touching you. Your right foot was between Remus’, him also not wanting to not be touching you. You had let your left foot be free so you could be touching Sirius as well, but he didn’t take. Looking under the table, being as subtle as possible, you saw James’ shoe-covered feet, one of them touching the side of Remus’ foot and the other one between Sirius’ but moved in a way so yours wouldn’t reach his. You looked up at the table again and saw that Sirius was holding Remus’ hand on top of the table.
Your three boys were laughing and talking, as they normally did, and you tried to keep a smile on your face and keep up with the conversation, but you couldn’t help the way your stomach dropped slightly at the thought that Sirius didn’t want to touch you.
“What do you think, Bunny?” Remus asked, all of their eyes suddenly on you.
You looked up and looked between their faces.
“Huh?”
Remus let out a small laugh, “I just said that because the weather is so nice, we could go to the lake after class and asked what you thought about the idea, but you were too busy being in bunny world huh?”
“Oh yeah, that sounds nice,” you answered with a small smile. You looked down at your plate again and started to pick at your food, not feeling particularly hungry anymore.
Remus looked at you in a confused manner and looked between James and Sirius, who both shrugged their shoulders.
“Alright, lake after class it is,” James announced with a grin.
______________________________
Holding onto Remus’ hand, you were all making your way towards the castle entrance, after having enjoyed all of the late afternoon at the lake, getting as much sun as possible.
Making your way up the stairs towards Gryffindor tower and Remus not letting go of your hand indicated that they wanted you to join them in their dorm room, which you did with no complaints.
As you made it to their room the door was shut firmly behind all of you and the boys didn’t waste time finding one of their beds to place you on and make hasty work of removing the minimal amount of clothes you were wearing.
You could feel arousal starting to churn in your belly as James kneeled at the foot of the bed and removed your lace panties. Remus had moved behind you and laid you on his chest as he removed your bra. He didn’t waste any time placing his hands on your breasts, as soon as they were freed, kneading them and making you let out a needy whine.
“A desperate little thing, aren’t you?” Sirius asked rhetorically as he ran a finger through your soaked folds.
James placed a finger at your entrance, slowly circling it, gathering your arousal before slowly letting it enter you. You let out a small gasp at the intrusion.
“Such a good girl,” James cooed, thrusting his finger in and out of you slowly before adding a second finger.
You moaned and grabbed Remus’ right wrist as he moved it to your throat.
“She’s no good girl... she’s just a desperate whore who’s only good for one thing, but not even that,” Sirius scoffed out as his thumb started to circle your clit.
Your eyes snapped up to look at his face, your stomach dropped, and you could feel light tears starting to gather in your eyes at the mean comment.
You wanted to be good for him and for him to like you as much as James and Remus did, but you felt like an imposter of some kind and that Sirius just wanted the part with you to be over.
Sirius felt your stare and removed his gaze from your clit which he was working his finger on. As soon as he met your eye you looked back at James, scared that Sirius would be annoyed at you for looking at him.
James picked up the speed of his fingers. The lewd squelching sounds filling the room, causing you to blush.
“Aww, are you feeling shy? You’re absolutely pathetic,” Sirius mocked, the first part faking pity and the second almost like you were being scolded.
James removed his fingers and stood at the foot of the bed.
“Alright darling, up you get,” he said and helped you up on your knees in front of him.
He leaned down and kissed you while cradling the back of your neck to keep you in place. Your hands found their way to his t-shirt covered chest and slowly worked their way up in his hair.
After some time, you pulled apart and looked behind you to observe your two other lovers.
Remus’ clothes had been removed and Sirius was lying beside him as they lazily made out. Sirius had Remus’ cock in hand and stroked it slowly, causing you to whine at the sight.
James chuckled slightly at your small whine, “what’s wrong darling? You want to be a part of it?”
You turned your head back towards James and nodded. He chuckled again and helped you turn your body fully towards the two boys.
Behind you, James made haste work of removing his own clothes and cleared his throat to gain the attention of the two others.
“Our darling is feeling a little left out,” James said as the two boys broke apart and looked towards you, “what is it you want to do pretty girl?”
You looked at Sirius who just rolled his eyes, so you quickly looked over to Remus. James had placed his hands on your shoulders for encouragement.
“Uhm... can I pl-please suck your cocks sirs?” You said almost in a whisper, your cheeks burning red with embarrassment from the question you had asked.
“Of course, you can, bunny, especially when you ask so nicely,” Remus replied and motioned for you to come closer to him in his seated form.
You settled between his legs and slowly took over for Sirius by grabbing Remus at his base and stroking just like Sirius had.
You leaned down and took his tip in your mouth, circling it with your tongue. Just as you were about to take more, a harsh slap was landed on your ass causing you to jolt forward and gag around Remus.
“Come on, get to it!” Sirius said as he sat down beside Remus again.
You quickly recovered and started bobbing your head up and down on Remus’ cock, not wanting Sirius to be more dissatisfied with you.
As you were working your mouth on Remus, you felt James rub his tip through your folds before slowly pushing in.
You moaned around Remus at the stretch and Remus groaned as he feels the vibrations on him.
James set a steady rhythm while holding your hips in a bruising grip.
You could tell by Remus’ increased breathing and the small twitch of his cock in your mouth that he was close. Probably due to Sirius having worked him up prior to you sucking him off.
“That’s it bunny, take it all,” Remus groaned out as he emptied himself in your mouth. You kept sucking, making sure to get every last drop.
You pulled off of him and out of instinct let your tongue fall out of your mouth to show that you had indeed swallowed everything.
“There’s a good bunny,” Remus said while caressing your cheek, making you lean more into his touch as your mouth hung open and moans spilling out.
Remus and Sirius maneuvered so Sirius could sit in front of you and get his turn.
You didn’t wait for instruction you simply put your head down towards his bright red cock and put it in your mouth. You could taste the salty pre-cum and used your tongue to spread it down his shaft.
Behind you, you could feel James’ thrusts picking up speed and becoming sloppier, which meant he was close. James found your clit with one hand and drew fast circles on it, wanting you to finish before him.
You moaned loudly at the feeling and gagged slightly when you felt Sirius’ head meet the back of your throat.
Sirius scoffed, “come on we’ve taught you better than that, you really are useless.”
“Sirius,” Remus said firmly, almost as a warning, him knowing that you weren’t so good at degradation if it wasn’t paired with praise.
“What? She just needs to learn, it’s not that hard,” Sirius fired back, talking like you weren’t even there.
You could feel your orgasm building, the burn in your stomach also starting to gather from trying to hold it until you were told otherwise.
“You’re doing so well darling, cum for us,” James said between grunts as his own orgasm approached.
You didn’t need to be told twice. Your orgasm hit you, making you shake slightly and gag around Sirius again.
Your cunt squeezed and fluttered around James, prompting his own release.
You felt the warmth of his cum painting your insides and he rode it out slowly thrusting in you.
You grabbed Sirius’ thigh to ground yourself, but it was quickly slapped off.
“Did I say you could touch me with anything other than your mouth?” Sirius said, his tone feigning anger, but you took it as real anger and withdrew your hand back on the mattress and opted for the sheets to grab.
James pulled out and you could feel your mixed releases slowly run down your thighs.
Not long after Sirius started to grunt and moan softly. His release hit your tongue with no warning, but you still swallowed despite the slight gag you produced from it hitting the back of your throat.
Remus pulled you off of Sirius and wrapped his arms around you.
“You did so well, taking us all so well,” Remus said lowly in your ear.
“I’m going to lay you here and I’ll be right back to clean you up, alright?” Remus asked, even though it was more of a statement than a question.
You just nodded and were placed down on the mattress again as Remus got up to get his wand and a glass of water.
James went to gather clothes for all of you.
Remus returned and muttered a cleaning charm on all of you and handed you a glass of water, which you chugged and handed the glass back to Remus, who looked at you adoringly.
James returned with four shirts, three pairs of boxers, and a pair of clean panties that you had left with them for these situations.
You all quickly got dressed and you laid back down beside Sirius looking at him.
You didn’t actually meet his eyes and therefore missed the loving way he was staring at you, absolutely enchanted by you.
Out of instinct, you reached a hand up to caress his cheek, which you would normally do with James and Remus, but before you could make it to his face your hand halted and slightly twitched as you brought it back towards your chest.
You sat up quickly, not wanting to be in Sirius’ personal space.
“Uhm I just realized I forgot my wand in my own dorm, so I’ll just go get it and be right back,” you said quickly as you got out of bed and put back on the trousers you had been wearing to the lake.
“You don’t just want to get it tomorrow?” Sirius asked. You still didn’t meet his eye, not wanting to anger him.
“No, I’ll just get it now, that way I’ll also let you get a bit of a breather,” you said and dashed out of the room before any one of them could say anything more.
The three boys were left confused, and all looked between each other and the door you just left through.
“What the hell did she mean by that?” Sirius asked, sitting up on the bed.
“I’m not sure... maybe she needs a break from us?” James suggested.
“No, she usually wants to be close to us when we’re done and she said she would give us a break from her,” Remus pointed out, his brows knit together in confusion.
“You were quite mean towards her today, Pads,” Remus continued.
“She can handle it; she knows I don’t mean it,” Sirius replied.
“But does she really? You’ve been teasing her lately by not being affectionate towards her, what if she’s taking it as you being serious,” Remus stated.
“How long have you been doing this to her?” James asked all the attention now on Sirius.
“I don’t know, maybe a week or two, but it’s just because she gets all clingy when she’s needy and I want her to cling to me,” Sirius answered like he had been collecting data.
“But it hasn’t been working obviously, since she’s been clinging to James and me... Sirius, she probably thinks you’re mad at her or something,” Remus said with a sigh.
“She doesn’t know that this is your way of asking for affection! She needs reassurance,” James scolded lightly.
Sirius looked down at his hands, guilt bubbled up from deep inside.
“Well, I didn’t know, I thought she would tell me if it got to be too much,” Sirius said with a sad sigh.
“If she thinks you’re mad at her, I don’t think she’ll come back tonight... let’s check the map,” Remus said, already getting the map from his bedside table.
He set the map on the bed in front of Sirius and sat beside him, James on the other side.
Sirius muttered, “I solemnly swear that I’m up to no good.”
The map revealed itself and they all searched for you around the castle.
You weren’t in or near your own common room, neither were you close to Gryffindor tower.
“There!” James nearly shouted and pointed to your name in the astronomy tower.
“Alright let’s go,” Remus said, and the three boys left their room forgetting that they were only in boxers and a t-shirt.
You hadn’t forgotten your wand in your common room, it was tucked away in your bag that lay on the floor of the boy’s dorm.
You sat and looked at the view of the grounds as you sat with your legs dangling off the edge of the astronomy tower. You often came here to think or to just clear your head, it was peaceful.
You couldn’t help but think about what you were going to do. You obviously loved all three boys, but it broke your heart to think that maybe Sirius didn’t feel the same and you didn’t want to force him to be with you just because you wanted to be with him and the two others as well. You hadn’t noticed the tears until you felt one hit your hands. You especially hadn’t noticed the rushed footsteps that echoed up the stairwell, too lost in your thoughts.
The three boys stopped at the top of the stairs and looked out your figure sitting on the edge. You hadn’t turned around, so they knew you hadn’t heard them, even though they were panting and weren’t being particularly quiet.
“Puppy, are you okay?” Sirius’ voice startled you and you quickly tried to wipe away your tears with your hands.
The three boys made their way over to you. You thought that they would sit beside you, but instead, Sirius hooked his hands under your arms lifting you up and making you stand. You didn’t turn around like he expected you to, so he gripped both your arms and turned you around.
Sirius’ heart dropped when he noticed your red eyes and tear-stained cheeks. He placed a gentle hand on your cheek and caressing it softly and angling your face, so you were forced to look at his face.
“Why didn’t you come back to the room, pup?” He asked softly giving you a gentle smile.
Your heart fluttered at the gentleness and care he was showing, but you didn’t want to get too excited and having it ripped away from you.
“Oh, uhm I just thought that maybe you needed some space and just wanted to be you, boys, alone,” you said quietly looking between the three of them as James and Remus came to stand on either side of you.
“Why would we need space from you? We love spending time with you,” James asked, the confused tone evident in his voice.
Your cheeks were burning red with embarrassment, not wanting to air out your insecurities.
“What’s wrong, puppy? You can tell us,” Sirius urged.
You let out a nervous breath and tried to avoid his eyes, but when you looked away from Sirius you would be looking at either James or Remus, so there was nowhere to look but down.
“I-I just feel l-like that I’m in the way of you guys’ relationship,” you breathed out, still looking down, “I know you want to be with Remus and James and that I’m kinda just there as well, but I don’t want to force you to be with me as well if you don’t want to,” you mumbled the last part quietly aimed towards Sirius, but the three boys heard you loud and clear.
Sirius was quick to grab your face and make you look up into his eyes.
“That is absolute nonsense, of course, I want to be with you! What would make you think that I wouldn’t?” Sirius rushed out, not letting go of your face.
“Uhm… you don’t really like touching me and you haven’t really talked to me for about two weeks, and you call me pathetic and useless,” you say quietly, your voice breaking as tears start forming in your eyes.
“oh puppy,” Sirius said sadly as he realized how much his teasing had affected you.
“I’m so sorry, I love you so much and I want to be with you just as much as I want to be with these two idiots,” Sirius said, which earned him a swat at the back of his head by Remus and a swat on his arm from James.
“I didn’t mean to make you feel like I didn’t want to be with you… I just wanted to tease you so you would be clingier towards me,” Sirius admitted.
You cocked your head to the side slightly, confused by his statement.
“Yeah… Sirius has a weird way of showing affection and an even weirder way of letting us know that he wants affection,” Remus said with a light chuckle. “But we all love you and we all want to be with you, puppy,” you had never seen Sirius look so… well…serious, about anything ever.
You leaned up to press a kiss to his lips, a small part of you still afraid he would turn away. Your concerns were soon gone when he met you halfway and connected your lips in a loving kiss. You couldn’t help but smile into the kiss and wrap your arms around Sirius’ torso, him doing the same and holding your body close to his.
You broke the kiss and giggled when Sirius followed your lips whining for another kiss. You turned your head and kissed both Remus and James as well as you could, still in Sirius’ arms as he refused to ease his grip on you.
“Again, I’m so sorry, our beautiful girl, I’ll never ever make you doubt my love for you again,” Sirius stated and reconnected your lips.
4K notes · View notes
starlightxsvt · 3 years
Text
3 dates | c.sc
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pairing ➳ badboy!Seungcheol x female!reader
genre ➳ badboy au, romance, some fluff, angst, bad attempt at humour, gets spicy at the end.
word count ➳ 12.4k+ (i have NO idea how this became so long so strap in for a ride)
warnings ➳ cursing, mentions of killing, mentions criminal activities, slight violence(non explicit), smoking, ma man Seungcheol ain't your typical badboy, self doubt, blackmailing, reader does all sorts of risky things cuz she's a SIMP, blood(nothing explicit), kissing, marking, some breast worshipping, grinding, reader is horny lol. (Please lemme know if I forgot anything.)
synopsis ➳ after one fateful encounter with him you cannot get him out of your head. so you opt to do some crazy things to catch his attention and even snag a few dates with him. only trouble is he isn't the type to stay after the whole disposition is over.
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Swirling the third drink in your hand you heave yet another depressed sigh. You are so tired that you feel like you can just slump on the counter and pass out. Maybe it wasn't a good idea to stop for a drink, you alcohol riddled brain thinks.
The plans you had with Katelyn was cancelled last moment; she called to tell you that her thesis submission date was moved forward and so she couldn't hang out with you tonight. You're in the middle of an existential crisis quite literally, the too many part time jobs yet still lack of money and copious amounts of study getting to you. Staring hard at your drink you contemplate if it is worth giving up on college and your dream of becoming an arts major. It sure feels tempting right now, the long hours at the diner and not enough sleep at night proving to be the worst nuisance.
Sighing you put down your drink. It's still early, you should go home and try to catch up on the much needed sleep. You really had no intention of grabbing a drink tonight; you have morning classes tomorrow but you made a last moment decision to stop for a drink on your way back home. You didn't take your usual route to home today, and while trudging through the streets tiredly you came across this bar called Seventeen's. You've heard stories about this place, how it is the home to local gangs and how it's bad people's turf and what not. Your curiosity, probably too much of that made you get inside for a drink even though all the bones in your body ached. The inside is what you expected, nowhere near fancy but dingy, just decent enough. The people inside didn't look friendly and if the chains and tattoos on them gave any indication you'd say the rumours are true; this is the turf of gangs. The drinks taste decent, not the best but not the worst and from the overall look of this place you don't really have a reason to come back.
You're about to stand up from your stool when a large, clammy hand grabs your wrist out of nowhere, making you jump. "Hey sexy, sit down. Let me buy you a drink," the owner of the hand, a large, tattooed middle aged man slurs making your nose scrunch out of disgust. You're wearing nothing that can be called sexy; a plain cardigan and jeans and the way he looks you up and down makes you want to poke his eyes out.
You really shouldn't have come here. Clenching your jaw, you meet his eyes, "What makes you think I'm interested to have a drink with you?"
"Oh come on, why would you be here then, lookin' all nice? Just sit down," the man drawls, an ugly smile on his face. He still hasn't let go of your wrist and it's making you impatient. Looks like you're gonna have to kick his balls tonight. Maybe the self defense classes didn't completely go to waste.
"Get your disgusting hands off me while I'm being nice, sleazeball," you hiss at him, trying to get his hand off. The man stands up growling, "What did you say you bitch?" You're preparing to break his nose when out of nowhere a punch lands on his face that sends him tumbling to the ground. The attacker gets on top of him and twists his arm and you can literally hear a bone snap.
Shit.
"I think she said she is not interested," the man hisses, landing yet another another hit on his face before kicking his groin and getting up. When he turns around and his eyes meet yours, your heart skips a few beats and you almost The man is drop dead gorgeous, someone you would not expect to see here but probably on the cover of a high end magazine. His blond hair is long, crossing the nape of his neck as well as some covering his forehead. What takes your breath away the most is his eyes, the most beautiful pair you've ever seen. They seem to have their own galaxies in them, so deep and mesmerising and decorated with lashes long enough to make you jealous. His dress up, black jacket and jeans, immediately tells you what he is; a gang member.
"You should get home, lady," He speaks in a no nonsense tone, his face cold as ice. But you're offended. "Excuse me? Who are you calling lady? You make it sound like I'm old." You puff your cheeks and cross your arms, trying to appear intimidating. "Besides I had the situation under control, you didn't need to butt in." The man keeps looking at you with that no nonsense look, his features displaying annoyance if you are right and he's clearly not intimidated. The dude on the floor grunts and makes an effort to get up, only to be kicked by your saviour once more. "Hey Mingyu, get him out of here. What was this piece of trash doing here anyway?" The man orders to someone before turning to look at you, "Do you live far?"
"Uh- no, a ten minutes walk from here maybe," you reply unsurely, surprised at his question. The blond haired man nods before grabbing your wrist, "I'll walk you home. Hurry up, lady." You have a feeling he's purposely calling you that and though you start following him out of the bar, you make grunts of protest.
"Oh yeah, why? Trying to find out my address? So you can come later and hurt me like that guy?" You would not be this brazen if it wasn't for the alcohol in your system, after all the man next you isn't a friendly one if the rumours are true. The man raises a brow at you, "Did you do something that requires me to beat you up?" You hiccup at his serious tone. Does he not get a joke? He lets go of your hand now that you're at a safe distance from the bar but still stays close enough to you as your steps are rather stumbling and messy. You aren't fully drunk but your body is tired and feels like will shut down any second.
You really need some sleep.
"You know I'm not that drunk. You don't have to walk me home." You complain. "I'm walking you home because this isn't a nice place you should be alone at night. What happened earlier could happen again." He says not looking at you. "Mhmm," you keep on trudging behind him, "Thank you so much for your kind gesture, sir." You mock him but he doesn't reply, staring straight ahead, completely ignoring you as he walks quietly. In silence you two walk the rest of the path, before finally stopping as your apartment comes into view. At this point it feels like your bones will break and you will plop down on the concrete any second, but you manage to keep standing. "Well, thanks for walking me home." You shift your weight from one foot to another. "And for helping me back there." He shrugs coolly, a bored expression on his face. He's turning to walk away when you call, "Hey- I didn't get your name."
"What do you need it for?" He side glances at you. You shrug, "I don't know. You helped me so I thought it'd be nice to know your name." "You don't need to. Go inside, lady." He says, his tone final and starts marching away. You wait a couple moments before yelling, "Asshole!" and quickly rushing inside your building, partly afraid he's gonna come back.
You won't be surprised if you get killed tonight.
-
"So you are telling me Choi Seungcheol walked you home?" Katelyn screams in your ear, jolting up from her seat, earning glares from other people at the library in the process. "That's his name?" You whisper-yell, grabbing her hand to pull her back down. "I'm guessing from the blond hair you said," Katelyn shrugs. "Uh huh." You mean back in your chair, "He was hot though."
"Is that seriously all you have to say?" Katelyn whines exasperatedly. "No, I mean, if it wasn't for the way he dresses or talks I would have thought he's a model or something." You murmur.
"Are you sure he didn't hurt you?" Katelyn questions. "Hell no!" You frown. "He saved me from that creepy old dude. I was surprised too. I wish I didn't drink so much, I could have gotten a better look at his face," you sigh. "Seriously?" Katelyn raises a brow at you.
"Girl, you should have seen him. His aura and the way he carried himself was...so hot." You grin to yourself. Katelyn watches you like you've grown two heads. "Are you trying to tell me you have a crush on that gangster?" You smile sheepishly, "Maybe, I mean it's harmless. He was broody yet charming and I'm a girl so.... Also, it's not like he likes me too and is gonna come running whenever I ask him to bang me." You mutter.
"Oh he's gonna break your bones and bang your skull against a wall. That's what he's gonna do."
"Come on! Maybe he isn't so bad. Maybe the rumours are just rumours. Maybe he just looks intimidating and dresses up like that and people thinks he's a gangster." "Really? His name is on every bad thing that happens around here. From illegal racing to murders. Do you know that people say he has killed too?" "Like I said, rumours," you shrug being your stubborn self. Katelyn holds her hands up in surrender, "You know what? It doesn't matter. I'm glad you're alive so let's just put this behind us, shall we?" You don't reply but wiggle your brows at her, a conspirational look on your face. "Oh no, don't look at me like that," Katelyn warns. "Let's go to that bar tonight. Please?" You give her your best puppy eyes. "What are you? Fucking crazy? You wanna get killed?" She whisper-yells, scowling at you. "No. I just wanna take another look at him. Without the alcohol in my system you know. Besides, the place isn't that bad." You reply.
"Well then get killed by yourself. I'm not coming with you."
"I'll help you with your papers for the rest of the semester."
"Shit."
-
"Well, looks like your wish won't be coming true," Katelyn muses chugging down her fourth glass as you keep playing with your first one. It's nearing an hour since you've come to the bar and there has been no sign of the man you desperately seek. The place is exactly like it was the other day, filled with people who you wouldn't want to mess with.
Yet here you are.
"Let's call it a night," Katelyn sighs. "We're just wasting our time." You know that too but you don't want to leave; not just yet. You are well aware that this is just pathetic but you've this crazy urge to see that man once again. You don't know why you feel this way; you never felt like this before. Why are thinking yourself to death about a complete stranger? Has some kind of spell been casted on you?
"Yeah, let's get going," you murmur half heartedly. You help your friend stand up as she's a little wobbly on her feet and together you make your way through the door. "Should we call a cab?" You ask Katelyn. She shakes her head no and you nod, you arms wrapped around hers to support her in case she looses her balance. You start stepping away from the bar and towards the road to her place until a noise from behind makes you stop in your tracks.
"Did you hear that?" You ask, whipping your head behind. There's no one around and the street is mostly dark other than the light flashing from the name of the bar. You hear the sound once again and this time you can locate where it's coming from. There's an abandoned playground at the back of the bar and you've a feeling that's the source.
Katelyn hisses as she sees you step towards there. "What are you doing!"
"Didn't you hear that?"
"Yes I did. That's why I say we leave!" You ignore her and cautiously keep on stepping forward, mentally cursing yourself for wearing heels. Katelyn follows behind you murmuring all kinds of warnings. "You know curiosity killed the cat, right?" She whispers.
You roll your eyes, "Well I'm not a cat. Just- be quiet. It can be nothing." You both move past the bar gingerly and towards the playground at the back. There are old gallons of oil and abandoned materials just around the corner and you two quickly hide among them. It takes you a while to get adjusted to the low light after you poke your head up from the hiding spot.
You're eyes fix on him immediately. His blond hair makes him easily recognisable amid the darkness. There is a few more people around him, all kicking something in the ground. Not something, but someone. The man lying on the ground groans in pain and you realize this is what you both heard. "Shit," You hear Katelyn curse from beside you. "We need to get going." Instead of replying, you keep your eyes trained on the scene unfolding, holding your breath. You're tranced. Seungcheol lands continuous punched on the guy laying below him and after a moment his writhing frame seems to stop moving as it falls limp.
Fuck.
"You know in movies this is the part where people get caught." Katelyn whispers, her voice hoarse and her hand clutching yours in a tugging motion. "Uh-huh. But I can't seem to move. I wonder if he's... really dead." You whisper back. "Are you fucking crazy!" She hisses. "You wanna witness murder?"
Before you can reply you hear a sound that echoes through the empty field and it takes a second for you two to realise that it came from any one of you two. You don't have the time to figure out who made it as you both are crawling away from the playground without looking back, head crouched low to avoid being seen. You don't know if they heard that or if they're coming behind you, you both just keep scrambling, moving until you're past the corner. As soon as possible you both get on your feet and run like the grim reaper is chasing you, stopping only when you are far enough from the bar.
"I am never listening to you again!" Katelyn yells.
-
It's been a good few days since your near death experience and you somehow find yourself in front of that bar once again. You and Katelyn have not brought up that incident after that night. You made yourself believe that it was over and came to a conclusion that it is better to forget that man and leave all of it behind, no matter how much your heart disagreed. But it's easier said than done; you may not mention him out loud but in the back of your mind you think of him. He's like a ghost, haunting you all the time, plagueing your thoughts when you go to bed at night. It felt like he was ever existent and there was an itch in your heart that drove you insane.
Maybe that's why your subconscious brought you here, in front of Seventeen's, once again. You were on your way back home from library and you thought you took your usual route, until you realized you were standing in front of that place. But what is even terrifying is that the man haunting your mind stands in front of the entrance of the bar and you blink a few times to make sure you are not hallucinating. He's leaned against the entrance door, cigarette between his lips and from his pocket he fetches a lighter to light the poison in his mouth.
Damn, lighting up a cigarette never looked this sexy.
He hasn't seen you yet and you contemplate running the other way. That's the sensible thing to do but you, not being a sensible person, start walking towards him. Your footsteps make him look up and notice you and like the last time, there is no expression on his face. It's the same bored yet handsome face except now in daylight you can take a better look at him and this time, you notice a little mole on the left of his face, by his nose. Realising he's gonna stay silent you decide to speak, "Hi... It's me... Do you remember me?" Wow. That's such an intelligent thing to ask.
With the monotoned yet serious expression on his face, he goes, "Why won't I? I don't have Alzheimer's."
So he can joke.
You laugh, an awkward, probably exaggerated laugh. "What are you doing here? Did you not learn your lesson last time?" He cuts to the chase, his voice brassy and deep, almost threatening. You want to roll your eyes. "Who are you to say? I can be wherever I want whenever I want, thank you very much." "Well then, have fun getting in trouble like last time." He's nonchalant as he blows a smoke right past you and stands up straight, turning away. "Wait!" You almost grab his hand, desperate to stop him.
What is wrong with you? Your subconscious slaps her forehead. What are you holding him back for? To say 'hello sir, I think you're hot, can you please put your dick inside me'? Seungcheol turns his head back, his eyebrow cocked up.
Why do you find everything about him so attractive?
"Um...I know your name, Seungcheol." You speak, trying to sound intimidating, like knowing his name gives you some power over him. There's something definitely wrong with you which is why you don't want him to leave just yet and which is why you're stalling time. But it seems to have done the job as he pulls the cigarette out of his mouth and turns towards you, an annoyed look on his face. "How do you know that?" The timbre of his tone is deep and it rakes shivers down your spine. "Well, you've built quite a reputation for yourself so it isn't hard to get your name." You shrug coolly. "Well, if you know so much about my reputation, you should know what I'm capable of." His lone is low, almost threating as he starts to take slow steps towards you making you step back out of reflex.
Maybe this wasn't such a good idea. Maybe you will also end up like the curious cat.
"Oh yes, I know. People have got a lot to say about you," you try to sound unfazed, not meeting his eyes that you feel are burning holes on your face. "What are you doing here, lady?" he asks slowly, pausing between each word and glaring at you as he continues to step forward. You can feel his patience thinning.
"I swear to God if you call me that-"
"What are you doing here?" This time his tone is scary, too scary. It makes you lose the ability to speak for a second as his dark gaze bores into you. He has backed you up against the wall behind you and you swallow. Right, what are you doing here? It probably has something to do with a very hot individual and his insanely attractive aura. Scratch that you are a hundred percent sure it has something to do with the blond haired, enticing man in front of you. He's driving you mad and you need to get your fill of him.
"Go out with me," you state and you are sure you've never spoken words more stupid than that. Internally, you cringe and pray that the ground below you would open and take you straight to the fiery pits.
This is the first time you see some sort of expression come across his face; surprise. He looks utterly shocked and somewhat confused. His mouth opens just a little and he squints at you, "What?"
There's no going back now.
"Go out with me. Let's go on three dates." you say once more, looking him in the eye. He seems to appear even more surprised, a dumbstruck look sitting on his face. He observes you quietly for a while and you can feel the gears in his head shifting. You wonder what he's gonna say next. Or maybe he won't say anything but bang your head on the wall and leave you to die alone. "I'm sorry I'm not following," he looks genuinely perplexed. "I want to go on three dates with you. They say after three dates you can figure out whether you like that person or not and I think I like you so..."
I think I like you.
The biggest understatement of the year.
Seungcheol tilts his head, an amused expression on his face as he studies you, those sharp eyes of his settling on yours, "What is your deal, sweetheart?" He crosses his arms, a brow raised. Sweetheart? That's new. And definitely better than lady. You can't deny how hearing him call you that makes your insides melt. "Nothing. I just want to date you," you shrug, trying to keep your wits together. His proximity is driving you wild; you can sniff a faint smell of cologne and cigarette, him being inches away from you. This time he laughs loudly, a mocking laugh you'd say. "Who sent you?"
Oh my god.
You roll your eyes. "Nobody sent me! Do I look like I'm a gang member or something?" "Then I don't see a reason why you'd want to date me," He states, throwing a challenging look at you.
"What if I said I have a thing for bad boys?"
He snorts. "You don't look the type to date bad boys," he mocks. "Who are you to say that?" You cross your arms. "I want to date you because I think you're hot, okay?" You can not believe you just said that. Looks like you don't have control over your mouth anymore. Warmth spreads throughout your face like a forest fire.
Seungcheol narrows his eyes on you, his tongue poking his cheek as he stands in front of you as if trying to read your mind. After a beat he sighs before looking at you, his eyes becoming darker than usual and his gaze unforgiving. "Hey. Does it look like I'm playing house here? Do you have any idea about the shit I do? The dirty work I do? I don't care if you have a fucking fetish or whatever but this is the last time I'm warning you. I don't want to see you around again. If I see you here once more, you're in fucking trouble," he spits and starts stomping away. His tone is serious and you know very well he is not joking, which is why you use your last resort. You're embarrassed at yourself for being so desperate but at the same time you feel shameless. It has almost turned into a game at this point, you want to make him surrender. That's right, you want him to give in. "You shouldn't be like that with me. I saw you, a few days ago. That night, when you and your friends were beating up that guy...in the playground," you casually stroll to come stand right behind him.
You can't believe you are blackmailing a gangster. Your death must be near.
Seungcheol whips his head back, his eyes glaring at you and you can almost see fire in them. Finally, you got his attention.
"My friend also saw it, we both did. You killed him, didn't you? Me and my friend witnessed a murder. What do you say? Should we go to the station?" You can see his jaw clench and you can't hold back a victorious smirk. Moments pass by as your words hang in the air and the tension between you gets thicker. Yet once more he surprises you, breaking the silence with a chuckle, "Well I killed one person, what makes you think I can't take care of another?"
You swallow.
"Well, my friend already knows so if I go missing you can be sure that the cops will come to you first." You throw back at him.
When did you get so wreckless?
Seungcheol stares at you for a few more seconds before shrugging and moving his hand dismissively, "Well then go tell the cops. I don't give a shit." He starts walking back to the bar leaving you starstruck. He stops and turns towards you before opening the door, "Also, I meant it. I hope I don't see you around. Otherwise I may just have to hurt that pretty face."
-
You don't show up after that.
Mostly because you are embarasssed.
It's been a good while after your last encounter with Seungcheol and you didn't go to the police, obviously. Because you don't have evidence and from what you've heard Seungcheol is pretty influential around here and you don't need to go to an extent to get on his bad side. You're definitely gonna end up dead if you do so, which you don't want just yet.
Classes have just finished and you and Katelyn step out of the classroom together, walking through the hallways and into the main campus. She rambles on about some bad sushi she ate yesterday while your mind remains preoccupied. Maybe you need to get laid. Maybe that'll make you forget about Seungcheol. You just need good dick that's probably why you were so desperate for him.
That's just a stupid lie.
You don't realise Katelyn is calling you until she shakes you by the shoulder and you snap back into reality. You notice her face is as pale as a ghost and following her line of sight your eyes stop on him.
Him. Seungcheol.
What?
You double take, blinking furiously to confirm your vision. He's standing there, in the parking area of your uni, leaned against a convertible Ferrari, a cigarette between his lips. He looks relaxed, like he does this regularly. Students whisper in each others ear while gawking at him curiously. "What did you do!" Katelyn yells. "Nothing!" You hiss back.
"Then why is he here!"
"I don't know!"
Your eyes meet with Seungcheol's and a smirk spreads across his face making you shiver. He stands up straight and tilts his head, an indication for you to come closer to him. "Fuck, he's here for me," you mumble. "Of course he's here for you, dumbass," Katelyn snaps. "Well, if I don't return, you know who killed me." You sigh starting to walk towards him. "Wait- you're going with him?" She asks incredulously.
"Don't worry. I'll keep my phone on. I don't think he's gonna murder me, I mean there are so many witnesses." You inhale deeply, leaving behind a lost looking Katelyn.
Seungcheol says nothing as you stand right in front of him raising an inquisitive brow but he only holds open the door for you to get in. Deciding to follow him you enter the car quietly and a wave of gasps go through the crowd.
There's gonna be talk about this tomorrow.
Seungcheol, still smirking victoriously for some reason rounds the car and gets inside and within seconds you're hitting the road. There's a thick silence for a while, which feels like ages to you. You're overwhelmed, bewildered to say anything; your poor brain still processing what is happening. You're nervous, jittery as you fiddle with you bag and look out on your side, for some reason scared to look at him.
What if he really kills you? He wouldn't, right?
"You're awfully quiet," Seungcheol says matter of factly as he spares you a glance while driving.
"I'm... processing."
"What are you, a robot?"
"Why are you doing this?" You question instead.
"Doing what?"
"Okay, you know very well what I mean. Why are you picking me up from uni all of a sudden? How do you even know I'm a student there?" "I have resources and...you didn't protest at all. You came along nicely," Seungcheol raised a brow at you, a cocky smile on his lips. You don't answer but continue to stare at him, trying to pin him down with your gaze. He finally sighs and pulls the car to a stop by the side of the road, the sudden brake making you slightly jerk in your seat. "I've decided to give you those 3 dates. That's why," He is calm, unreadable and you wonder if this is a prank. Then again, he has no reason to prank you, does he? "Really?" Your voice comes out breathy. "Yes. I thought I'd give you a taste of how it feels to be with someone like me. I can scare people without physically hurting them you know," He says in a menacing tone.
"So what? You're taking me to an underground fight or something?" You question. "Nah, we're keeping it simple today." He smirks as he starts the car again and turns on the radio, an indication that he doesn't want to converse anymore.
Shamelessly you take a good look at Seungcheol; he's dressed in another jacket today paired with a black tee underneath. Today, you notice he has upped his accessory game, his fingers full of rings and chains dangling from his neck. But what catches your attention is a tattoo, something like a dragon and words written in a language you don't understand, peeking from underneath his sleeve. You almost ask about it but decide it'll probably be too much and he wouldn't answer you anyway.
As you do so, in the back of your mind you think you should have dressed better, something cuter, more appropriate for a date rather than a plain blouse and jeans. But then again who knew Choi Seungcheol was gonna show up out of the blue. You're gnawing at your lower lip, lost in your thoughts when the car is pulled to a halt and you realize your ride is over. You're parked in front of a diner called Lacy's and from the vibe that the place is giving, you can tell that this is place where people like him hang out. You raise a questioning brow at Seungcheol who says, "I know it doesn't look fancy but trust me I has some of the best food I've ever eaten." Taking his words for now you quickly type out a text to Katelyn letting her know you're in one piece and get out of the car.
Once you're seated you look around the place which is relatively empty except some men playing pool at the far end. You watch Seungcheol who has gone to the reception booth to place your orders; his posture relaxed as he leans against the counter and talks to the girl standing there. They seem to know each other because their chat takes longer than it should and the girl has a shy, almost flirty smile on her face.
He probably fucks her.
You shake the thought off your head as the gangster comes back and sits in front of you. There's silence for a second as you wonder if you should just ask the questions that run free around your mind. "Are the rumours true?" You blurt out. He's raises a brow.
"About you. You know..."
"Do you want them to be true?" He asks back. "I don't...know," you reply. "Well, I think it depends on each person. If you want it to be true it is true, if you don't it isn't," he shrugs, leaning back in his chair. "Why don't you just give me a straight answer?" you snap. He smirks as if he's having fun but doesn't reply, watching you with his arms crossed. You roll your your eyes, blowing out an exasperated breath. "You know, I haven't seen one like you. Willingly hanging out with dangerous people, going to dangerous places. You say you saw me kill someone yet you're here. You're almost desperate to get in trouble," he observes. "I'm not desperate to get in trouble. I just...I'm just- attracted to you alright?" This is so embarrassing. You need to shut your mouth. "You've been on my mind ever since that night. I wanna see exactly how deep I'm into you." You bite your lip.
That's enough. You will boost his ego through the roof like this.
Seungcheol studies you for a bit before grinning cockily, "Well, if you didn't know, I am trouble baby. Just you being with me might end you up in a mess." Before you can reply, your food is served, that same girl from the booth setting down your plates and looking at Seungcheol for a bit too long with that same stupid smile which he returns. You don't know why but you feel jealous, jealous of whatever these two share, whatever she has with him.
You've lost your mind at this point. You're on a high that is Seungcheol. He has made you forget your morals, made you completely lose your mind. Or maybe you've been too good all your life and seeing him brought out that crazy, thrill seeking part of yourself.
Silently you dig into your food and as Seungcheol said, the food is really good. This is one of the best meatloaf you've ever had and you can't help but moan. Seungcheol watches you with an amused smile before popping a fry in his mouth.
"What's your major?" Seungcheol asks out of the blue.
"Uh- sociology."
"Mmhmm."
You're about to ask him what he studied in college but you assume he probably never went to one so you seal your lips. You wonder what his background is and who his parents are but you don't want to get too personal on the first day. So you ask something else, "How old are you?" He laughs out loud before he deadpans, "Thirty five." "What!" You almost choke.
There's no way he's-
"Why? What did you expect?"
"I... I don't know! A few years older than me? You're kidding right? You don't look thirty five." He has to be bluffing. "And how old would you be?" "You shouldn't ask a woman her age," you try to make a point. "Don't you have any manners?" He smirks,"I don't, sweetheart. To answer your question, I'm twenty eight."
Uh huh.
"Well, I'm twenty one," you mutter under your breath. You don't know if he hears it because he doesn't give any reaction, busy twirling a fry in sauce. The rest of your meal is full of silence as you wonder if your date will end like this; dry and boring. He's awfully silent and seems to be lost in thoughts as he doesn't engage in a conversation. You're about to take your last bite when the silence is broken by him.
"What did you see that night?" He leans over, his elbows resting on the table as he suddenly regards you with a sombre look, his earlier cockiness vanished. His eyes have once again gone dark and his demeanor says he's not being superficial right now. You're caught off guard as you cough loudly, reaching for your glass to take a sip of water. "What?"
"You heard me. What did you see that night? Exactly how much did you see?" He repeats. You're confused. You thought he didn't care about it. He said it didn't matter. So why is he bringing it up now? You've worked hard to push that night in the deepest part of your brain, pretending it didn't happen.
And then suddenly it clicks.
"You!" You point an accusatory finger at him as you catch on to his plan. "You've agreed to go out with me so that you can find out what I saw that night!" Seungcheol groans, rubbing the bridge of his nose. "Ugh, just fucking tell me!" He snaps, annoyed that you've found out his little scheme. You scoff, "I thought you said you didn't care? Besides it's not like I'm going to tell the police." He rolls his eyes and leans back into the couch. "Just tell me and let me go."
You're baffled. His actions didn't make any sense and you actually thought he had no other intentions behind dating you but holy shit this sneaky bastard. "You sly little asshole!" You hiss at him. "Call me that once more and you'll regret it." He threatens. You roll your eyes sagging back into your seat, "Whatever." Then an idea hits you. "You know what, I'll tell you exactly how much I saw that night." You have Seungcheol's full attention now as he stares intensely at you, waiting for your next words. "On our third date. When this whole deal is over, I'll tell you. But in return you'll have to keep your promise and take me out on two more dates."
"Oh fucking hell," he groans rubbing his face in frustration. His state makes you smirk and you feel accomplished.
Choi Seungcheol is stressed because of you.
What a day to be alive.
You murmur, "Besides this isn't even a proper date. This was more like an interrogation. But I'll go easy on you and won't make you redo this date." You give him a sweet smile and he sees red. You can literally see fury blaze in his eyes. "Whatever!" He yells and abruptly stands up. "I don't have time for this. Your stupid play date is over. I'm dropping you home."
Before you can reply, he's marching towards the door. You've to admit this wasn't the best date but at least you've trapped Choi Seungcheol.
-
It has been a good week after your so called date at the diner and you haven't heard from him. You expected him to call or text you since he was gracious enough to ask for your number but he didn't. You now realize it was a mistake to not get his number; you had asked him for his when he took yours but being the prick he is he denied to hand over his number to you. You should have forced him to, you sigh. As you sit in the library the ping of your mobile distracts you from your racing thoughts as you realize you have a message. Picking the device up you tap on the notification. Even though it was from an unknown number, you have no trouble figuring out who it is from. A smile graces your lips as you read the words over again.
I'll pick you up from your house tomorrow evening at six.
That's all it says and that is good enough to send a thrum of excitement throughout your body.
-
You have not held back in dressing up today and you realize it's been a long time since you've dolled up yourself. A long before the clock strikes 6 you are ready; dressed in a cute pastel top and a matching skirt. You've also went ahead and applied makeup, not too much but just enough to maybe catch his eye. Maybe.
You wonder what he has planned for today.
A text from Seungcheol saying he's here has you flying out of your apartment as fast as your feet can carry your desperate self to see him. He stands in front of your apartment with his convertible, dressed in a white jacket that matched his pants. You take a deep breath before walking towards him, trying to calm all your nerves down.
"You know I expected to hear from you earlier. I've been waiting all week," you voice makes his head turn around to meet your eyes as you are skipping towards him with a teasing smile in your face. "I've been busy," he shrugs coolly, his eyes going over your whole body, from your legs to your face. He doesn't hide that he's taking a good look at you, in fact does it unashamedly.
You wonder if he likes what he sees.
Someone dressed up today," he comments. "Too bad we aren't going to a place where you can show off your pretty clothes." You frown, "Where are we going?" Seungcheol holds open the door, a mischievous smile on his face. "I've decided to grant your wish." With a confused face you get inside the car, the gears in your head running. What does he mean?
"I'm taking you to an underground fighting ring," he says with smirk as he reaches for something behind his seat. He pulls out a large hoodie and tosses it towards you, "Put this on. Otherwise you are going to attract a lot of attention and you don't want that." You gulp, taking the hoodie and putting it on you. You're slightly embarrassed. You were so excited to try this outfit but it's not like you knew he was taking you to a fight club. Hell you would have dressed like a guy if you knew. You shrug on the hoodie and it falls almost to your knees but it's huge and comfy and most importantly it smells like him. There's a hint of cologne, nothing too strong; a subtle, expensive scent that makes you want to take a deeper sniff. You wonder if you can keep this with you.
Stop it, pervert.
Seungcheol's voice pulls you out of your haze, "You can take it off later. Just wear it until we're out of there," he says and brings the engine to life.
Then you actually think about it. Underground fighting ring? Holy shit. You were only kidding when you mentioned it. Admittedly, you're shocked, somewhat horrified. Everyone knows it isn't the best place to be at especially for someone like you who never had such an experience. Seungcheol must have seen your expression because the smile on his face gets bigger, "Why? You not up for it?" His voice is teasing.
He's challenging you.
Oh well.
"Of course I'm up for it," you square your shoulders, keeping your voice cool. "Bring it on."
-
Seungcheol leads you into a bar and then through a door at the back that leads down to a lot of stairs, reaching a place similar to an underground parking lot. Quietly you follow Seungcheol, staying as close to him as possible, your bodies occasionally touching. He leads you to a pair of double doors and from the other side you can hear men shouting and chanting.
This is it, I guess.
Seungcheol throws one more smile at you before pushing open the doors as you scramble to follow him closely. The sight that greets you something you only see in movies. There's a boxing ring where two people are throwing punches at each other and surrounding them from all sides is a wild, loud and excited crowd. They continue to cheer loudly as the two men in the ring continue to box and you hear their grunts and groans.
Holy shit.
Swallowing your eyes meet Seungcheol's who is regarding you with curiosity. "What do you think?" He has to speak loudly for you to hear over the screaming throng. "Uh... It's loud," you say dumbly as you try to think of a reply. But it's too loud for you to even think properly as you take in your unfamiliar surroundings. You see a tall man approaching towards you and out of reflex you shuffle closer to Seungcheol until you realize it's his friend. The guy from the first night. He and Seungcheol grin at each other, patting their backs as they talk close to each others ears. You gawk at them curiously and realize they must be talking about you because his friend takes curious glances at you occasionally. His friend is tall, really tall and well built but unlike his body his face is sweet and puppy like, almost cute. When he grins his canines pop up just like a puppy and you wonder if all his friends are good looking.
After he's done chatting with his friend Seungcheol pulls you close and says, "This is my friend. Mingyu. Always stay near him, you hear me? Don't stray away unless you wanna get hurt." His eyes are stern as he pins you down with his stare but you have other thoughts running in your head.
"What do you mean? Where are you going?" You yell over the noise.
He just smirks at you and starts taking his jacket off. "About time you see how we do it around here." His tone is cocky as he hands his jacket to you, "Hold this for me. And stay close to him."
Giving a look at Mingyu Seungcheol starts walking away towards a door that you're guessing is the changing room.
He's gonna fight.
"Wait- but-" Mingyu stops you with a hand on your shoulder and offers you a kind smile. "It's fine. Just stay with me." He then ushers you towards the crowd, spotting a place where you can get a good look at the ring. "Do you guys do this often?" You look up at Mingyu. He smiles sheepishly, "Not me. I tried a few times and I always end up beaten to a pulp. But hyung does this often, he's really good."
"Uh huh, I'm sure he is," you smile dryly. "This is your first time watching a fight, no?" "Definitely." He grins, "Watch carefully then. It's really fun."
You have your doubts on how watching people beat each other up can be fun but you don't comment anything, instead chew on your lip anxiously. Seungcheol really didn't have to go this far? What if he gets hurt badly? Is he trying to impress you?
Don't flatter yourself, your subconscious rolls her eyes.
As the loud cheering that had died down ensues again, your train of thoughts are halted as you see Seungcheol in shorts and his hands covered in boxing gloves, step into the ring. You can't help but ogle at his naked torso, his finely defined and chiseled muscles. He has the perfect body, not too bulky, not too lean just the right amount that gives you a hard time taking your eyes off him. He seems to have noticed your gaze because the second your eyes meet, he throws a haughty, knowing smirk at you. Embarrassed you avert your gaze elsewhere.
His opponent is a muscular man who's growling and banging his chest with his fists, a gesture of intimidation, you suppose. You are definitely intimidated and you wonder if Seungcheol can actually win against him.
The fight starts with a whistle and in mere seconds they are on to each other, throwing punches left and right. Your eyes have a hard time keeping up with them and their fast reflexes and your hands fly to your mouth as a punch lands on Seungcheol's face, followed by repeated blows as Seungcheol falls back. There's a moment of silence as he wipes his bottom lip and you realize there's a cut.
He tilts his neck, popping the bones and glaring at the other man before launching himself on top of his opponent. The next moments are a blurry mess, Seungcheol beating the guy repeatedly until he ends up on the floor but he doesn't stop there. Seungcheol ends it with a sharp jab to his spine and you have no doubt the other man has broken bones with the ways he howls in pain. The match comes to an end like that as the people cheer wildly while Seungcheol steps down from the stage. Mingyu grins at you happily as if what you witnessed was just a regular occurrence, something you should be cheerful about. Shaking your head at the situation, you let out a deflated sigh.
Their life is really so different than yours.
-
Seungcheol seems to be in a very good mood after the fight as he buys you both some sandwiches and drinks from a deli after you both step out of the bar. You both sit down at a park nearby to eat and watch the night sky. "You know, I thought you were gonna lose," you speak after taking a few bites of the sandwich. Seungcheol scoffs, "You underestimate me, sweetheart. I've been doing this for a long time."
"Do you enjoy it?" You ask quietly, focused on peeling the wrapper from your food. You feel Seungcheol's stare on you. "Yes. Why? Are you scared already?"
"No. I was just... curious. Your definition and my definition of fun is totally different." You murmur. "Of course. What did you think? I go to the mall and shop and watch movies with my friends when I'm bored?" His tone is sarcastic. You bite your lip. "No I didn't. It's just...I feels different now that I have experienced it first hand." Seungcheol offers nothing more, taking a sip of his coke and leaning back into the bench. A silence stretches between the both of except the rustling of the wrapper of your food. "How long have you been doing this?" You blurt out. He frowns at you and you don't expect him to answer but he surprises you.
"For a long time."
He doesn't offer anymore and you don't have the heart to prod him for an actual answer. "And how long do you plan on doing this?"
"What?"
"I mean... don't you have any other plans. Like...do you wanna keep doing what you are doing for the rest of your life? Don't you wanna like... settle down maybe?" Your voice is soft as if you are talking to a child. Seungcheol looks annoyed. He doesn't speak for a while as he stares at the ground, a frown etched to his face. You're about to take back your question when he replies, "I really don't think you understand. I've been trying to tell you that my life is completely disparate to yours. So I don't think like you. I don't have plans like you but neither am I expected to follow a certain pattern like you. I can do whatever the fuck I want, ___. So don't look at me like you pity me. I'm the last person here that should be pitied. " His tone is sharp and it makes you feel bad, like a sensation of needles pricking your heart. "I didn't mean it like that. I'm sorry," You whisper, feeling timid as you look down at your lap. He mutters, "Don't go poking your nose in other people's business. Specially people like me."
He's right. You shouldn't have asked that. You are not close enough to ask things like that. After that there is a silence, this time, an awkward one. There's palpable tension in the air and you feel jittery. Should you just ask him to take you home?
It's still early and truth be told, you don't want to leave him just yet. You only have one more date to go and judging by his reaction, he is in no way interested in a relationship. You heave out a long sigh. You knew very well what you were getting into, yet you couldn't stop yourself. Seungcheol is like a poison, the sweetest one, the one that has you addicted and unable to let go, no matter how much it hurts.
This is a fucking mess.
"Let's get going. I have plans," Seungcheol announces, standing up. You want to protest but you feel like you have ruined the mood, so you follow him mutely to his car.
The drive to your house is awfully quiet, to the point you want to scream out of frustration. Seungcheol seems to be lost in his head as he makes no move to talk. It's like you are alone, but you're not and it's worse, the air full of tension. Soon you have reached your house and he stops the car but keeps the engine rolling, indicating his rush. He keeps still and stares ahead while gripping the steering wheel as you step out of the car in silence. "Thanks for dropping me home," you say lamely, your voice meek. You turn around to walk away but his voice stops you in your tracks.
"I promised you three dates and I will keep my word. I expect you to keep yours, ___. I hope you will tell me what I want to hear when we meet next time." His tone is sharp with an edge of threat and you barely get to nod before he drives away.
It's not until you're inside your apartment that you realize you still have his hoodie on. Quickly fishing out your phone you type out a text.
I'm sorry, I forgot to return your hoodie.
After a while, his reply comes.
Keep it.
-
You watch Katelyn as she fills her lunch tray with food before walking over and taking a seat opposite to you. She looks extra radiant today, which probably has something to do with the way she's dressed; a bright colourful outfit which undoubtedly she put a lot of time into considering. She has a date, with a guy she has been talking to for the last few weeks. It reminds you of your pitiful situation and you sigh, trying to shrug off those thoughts.
It has been a good couple weeks since you last saw Seungcheol and you have not exchanged a word after that night. In the back of your mind you wonder if he is even alive. You want to message him, you really want to because you are going crazy but after how your last date ended, you can't bring yourself to. You are scared, exactly of what, you can't put your finger into.
The entire situation you have put yourself into is fucking scary. They say you become sure of your feelings after three dates but it did not take that much for you. You already are very certain about your feelings for him and how deep they run exactly and you also know that in the end you will be left scarred. He would never be yours. He has probably forgotten about you or decided that it is not worth another date to figure out what you saw that night.
You let a desperate, pitiable sigh.
"I know you are hiding things from me but I understand that you are not ready to talk yet. But I want you to know I am here for you okay?" Katelyn's voice makes you blink your way out of your thoughts. She squeezes your hand tightly and gives you a reassuring smile and you're left feeling guilty.
"I ...I will tell you. Soon. Just give me a bit more time," you whisper. She nods in understanding. A grateful smile touches your lips as her words make you emotional. Then there's a ping from your phone letting you know there's a message. Without giving it much thought you open the device and your eyes go wide.
I'll take you out for dinner tomorrow night. Wear something formal.
-
You wait outside your apartment for Seungcheol. Your day has passed by in a flurry of excitement and nerves as you carefully picked your outfit and did your hair and makeup. A soft baby pink dress that stopped just above you knees adorns you as your hair rests just above your neck in a loose bun.
You are fiddling with your fingers as you think about how this night is gonna end and wether you will ever see him again when a car screech that grabs your attention.
Seungcheol's convertible has taken a stop in front of you and you see the man getting out the vehicle and take big steps towards you.
You're mesmerized.
Perhaps there is not enough word in this world to describe his looks or perhaps you've simple lost the ability to speak; either way, you just stand and stare, drinking the godly man that stands in front of you. He looks delectable, completely flawless and agonizingly gorgeous in his sharp black suit and pants, with a silk black shirt underneath, the top couple buttons undone that reveals a beautiful porcelain skin. His hairstyle completes the look, parted to one side in a sleek way and showing his forehead and oh god is it sexy. You realize you have a forehead kink, if there is anything as such.
If you weren't in love with him before you are now.
He looks ravishing, and you wonder why it isn't illegal to look this good. It should be because you have completely lost control over yourself. Nothing exists in your world except for him and you feel paralyzed, unable to do anything but drink him in. You wonder if you are even worthy to stand beside him.
"____?" Seungcheol calls you, snapping his fingers in front of your eyes. He must have been calling you while you were eye fucking him. "Oh! Um, hi." You're flustered. "You- you look really, really nice." It isn't enough but it's what you can get past your lips. A knowing smirk kisses his lips before he teases, "Well, you look really, really nice too." Motioning you to his car he says, "Shall we? We'll be late for our reservation."
"Yeah, of course," you say, hurrying over to his car, embarasssed at your foolery. Seungcheol must have noticed you ogling him like that. But you don't really care when he looks like that. It is his fault for looking so devilishly handsome and idly you wonder if he did that on purpose. If he's deliberately teasing with, trying to make you the most miserable before letting you go with a slap of reality to your face. Pushing away those plagueing thoughts, you sit up straight and clear your throat as Seungcheol comes to sit beside you and brings the engine to life.
A decently long and quiet (except for the music from the radio) but not quite uncomfortable car ride later, Seungcheol stops in front of a really fancy and expensive looking restaurant just by the sea. You did not except him to take you to a high end restaurant, otherwise you would have put some more effort in your looks.
Feeling slightly out of place you quietly follow Seungcheol into the beautiful European styled building after he hands his keys to a valet. The interior is dripping with polished furnitures and extravagant chandeliers and marble floors as guests dressed elegantly have their dinner. As you look around the place in awe Seungcheol talks to the receptionist who then guides you towards a staircase that leads to a pair of large double doors decorated with gold which then, opens to a large balcony. In the middle of it sits a table with two chairs and an unceremonious gasp escapes your mouth as you realize this is where you will be having dinner.
The man from earlier takes his leave as Seungcheol helps you sit down before taking a seat for himself while you take in everything, overwhelmed with all your surroundings. Why did he put so much effort for a lousy and fake date?
"What do you think?" He asks with a smirk as he rests one of his elbows on the table.
"I'm overwhelmed," you reply quietly, honestly. He chuckles, "Well this place has really good food and a fantastic view so I thought it wouldn't bad for our last date."
Last date.
"It's really beautiful. I don't know why you did this but thank you, really," you murmur, eyes on the satin table cloth with intricate golden lining. Everything about this place is so pretty.
"Well, I decided it would be beneficial for me to extract words from you if you are wooed," his words have a teasing tone to it and his demeanor is completely different from last time, giving you a whiplash but you are not sure if he's fully joking. Before you can say that you are definitely wooed, a waiter appears to take your order and you leave the duty of ordering to Seungcheol since he seems to frequent this place. Prior to his leave, the waiter pours you Seungcheol's champagne of choice and then, you two are alone once more.
Reaching for the flute, you quickly gulp down the champagne to soothe your dry throat and to calm all your nerves.
Over dinner you talk about your uni and your parents back home and the farm they own. While Seungcheol mostly keeps quiet he doesn't ignore you but listens carefully, occasionally passing glances your way or commenting. He does not offer anything about him, which you expected and you don't ask any questions about him either. Instead you try your best to keep his interest in your words despite the lack of it from his side.
After a hearty meal of poached lobsters and wagyu beefs and creamy soups comes dessert; a chocolate orange mousse with spiced fruits and yogurt sorbet. You start eating your dessert in silence, the occasional crashing of waves filling the complete lack of sounds.
This location is truly magnificent and breathtaking, almost having a feel like you're in a fancy resort in a luxurious tropical island. It is undoubtedly the most beautiful place you have ever been, let alone have dinner at and you wonder if you would ever have the chance to visit some place like this had you not met Seungcheol. The man in question, continues eating quietly, seemingly lost in his thoughts. He looks lovely as always, if not more and you try to burn this image in your mind for you to look back at later. You want to ask him so many question, you want to tell him so many things but you're scared. Sacred if you do so this moment will break, scared it will annoy him and end your final date all too early. So you bite your tongue and finish your food as he does and after your plates are cleared away, you are served another expensive champagne as an end to your luxurious dinner.
Even though Seungcheol doesn't say anything, you assume it is time to spill the beans, to say what he has been wanting to hear from the beginning. You have teased him enough and it is time you give him what he deserves. Taking a deep breath, you open your mouth. "Me and Katelyn heard noises from the playground that night so we decided to check. It was pretty dark and we were tipsy but I recognized you and you were... beating someone up. We stayed there and watched until one of us accidentally made some noise. We were scared that you heard us so we ran. That's all that happened."
You have Seungcheol's full attention now as he listens cautiously, his sharp eyes trained on you. Gulping, you clench your hands together underneath the table, waiting for his reaction. There seems to be an eternity of silence as Seungcheol simply stares at you as if he's debating whether your words are true or not. It's torturous, awfully agonizing and when you can't bear it anymore you're about to speak but he beats you to it.
"I didn't kill him." His voice is quiet. You let out a breath you didn't realize you were holding. Somewhere in the back of your mind you believed it, you believed he wouldn't be cruel enough to kill someone just like that and as soon as he speaks those words you believe him, without a doubt, without a second of delay.
"I believe you." You whisper, holding his gaze. "That asshole deserved what he got. He shouldn't even be alive but I let him go. He's in a hospital now, if you are wondering." You nod quietly. It's scary how much you believe him, how much you trust him even though he is pretty much a stranger.
There's a moment of silence as you bask in his presence before he speaks, "____, men like me, we aren't the nicest people. But we are needed, the cops need us around. People like me do the dirty works for people like you so y'all don't face troubles. We do things in an unconventional way but that's just who we are. We aren't as bad as the rumours say but we definitely aren't someone you should be with." You open your mouth to protest but his sharp gaze makes you stop. "If you have not understood it yet, let me say it out loud. I am trouble. People like me is always bad news. Whatever we did until now, I hope you forget. That's the best, ____ trust me. I think we both got what we wanted so let's call it a night." Just like that, he stands up, not waiting for your reply.
You gawk at him, baffled as he pays the bill and starts walking away. Tears burn the back of your eyes and you bite your lip to hold them back. The ending that you had expected has taken place but you are having a hard time accepting it. Your subconscious reminds you that you deliberately got yourself into this even though you saw this coming. So there is no one to blame for it but you. Grabbing your purse, you stomp your way out of the restaurant and towards Seungcheol's car.
Seungcheol barely acknowledges you as you both get in the car and he presses the key to the ignition. You are fuming in your seat, his words and the way he dismissed you cutting you deep. His words come to you, I think we both got what we wanted. You want to laugh. How can he possibly think that? Is he really so stupid or is he deliberately ignoring your interest in him? You want to smack his perfect face, curse and scream at him but all you can do is sit still with your arms crossed as steam comes out of your head. Is he really not curious about your feelings? Does he possess none for you? Does these few days with you mean nothing to him? You have so many unanswered questions. Leaning back into your seat, you close your eyes and let out a frustrated sigh.
It feels like in the blink of an eye the drive to your place is over as Seungcheol halts his car in front of your apartment. He does not utter a single word, doesn't even spare a glance at you while patiently waiting for you to get out of the car.
Asshole.
You inhale deeply, trying your best to gather yourself together as you take off your seatbelt and turn towards him.
"Seungcheol?" Few seconds pass before he looks at you. Words are stuck in your throat. When your eyes meet his, you become mute, overwhelmed with emotions as your words die in your tongue. He keeps staring at you, not opening his mouth but waiting for you to speak. "Is this goodbye?" Your voice breaks.
"I believe we don't have any reason to see each other. We both got what we wanted," He says without batting an eye. You're left bemused, one step away from landing a slap on his face. How dare he say that?
"Do you really believe that?" Your words come out as an accusation. "I wanted to go out with you because I thought I have feelings for you! And I do! And my feelings have only increased since I first saw you. I want to see you again, Seungcheol. You may have gotten what you wanted but I didn't." Your fades into a whisper as tears burn the back of your eyes.
Seungcheol stays quiet, staring ahead, his brows knitted as if he's annoyed. "I promised you three dates, ____. And I gave you that. It's over. Your feelings? You'll get over them. It's better to be in pain for a while that be with someone like me."
"You can't say that! I get to decide for myself!"
"____," he sighs, rubbing his temples. "I'm a bad man. You should leave while you still have a good image of me. You'll get hurt because of me and I've caused enough pain to enough people. Just...go. Just forget me." You stare at him as frustrated tears roll down your cheeks. He doesn't meet your gaze but turns his head the other way. You are angry, infuriated and heart broken all at a time. Clenching your fists you inhale a shaky breath before reaching for him.
Before you can chicken out, you tilt his face towards you and quickly press your lips against his. Seungcheol seems to be shocked as a small gasp leaves his mouth but you don't let him push you away. Instead one of your hands come to rest on his thigh as he other cups his face to keep his mouth against yours. You kiss him with all you have left, pouring in every bit of passion and love for him as your tongues intertwine. By the time you are both breathless, Seungcheol gently pushes you back and peers into your eyes. "That's all I can give you, ____." He says, his voice the softest you have heard. You are broken into a million pieces and as much as your heart wants to cling to him, you suddenly feel tired, deflated like a popped balloon. Your emotions have drained you out and left nothing and right now, breathing almost seems too painful for you. Taciturnly, you grab your purse and step out the convertible. You hear another door shut behind you but you don't look back as your heavy steps carry you to the entrance of your building. When you are about to enter your apartment, you accumulate all your strength and courage to spare one final glance at him.
Turning around you see Seungcheol standing by his car, hands in his pockets, simply watching you. Even though your eyes are locked on each other, you don't see any emotion in them. He looks like the same expressionless, mysterious man you saw the first day. The man you fell in love with. Taking in his gorgeous features one last time, you bite your lip and turn away, forcing yourself to walk inside your apartment building.
Your chapter with Seungcheol ends here.
Epilogue
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A/N : Okay so idk why this fucking app is being like this but it says I reached the maximum of 250 blocks but I thought tum1r didn't have a word limit?? Anyway so I've decided to break it up and put the rest of the fic in another post. Please click epilogue to read that.
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wri0thesley · 3 years
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nat something about toji drives me absolutely feral, can i have a scenario or something where he meets reader at a bar and they have a steamy one night stand i don’t know i just want this beeg beefy dilf to absolutely ruin my puthy (fem reader please!)
anon, i really hope you have a corruption kink
Favourite (So Far) - Toji x Fem!Reader (5k)
Toji sees you sitting alone at a bar; all quiet and soft and unsure, and absolutely begging to be ruined - and he decides he can help with that.
warnings: afab reader, fem pronouns. not sfw, mentions of murder. corruption kink, virgin reader, dacryphilia, fingering, coming inside, dirty talk. 
Toji normally doesn’t bother lingering after he’s held up his end of the bargain, but the money is burning a hole in his pocket and the minute he’d left the body of the man he’d been hired to kill locked in the back office of the bar, he’d remembered you.
He estimates he’s got a good half an hour before anyone realises the man is dead. If they’d wanted him to clear up after himself, they should have written it in the contract – still, with how awkward you’d looked and how your eyes kept darting about the place, Toji is pretty sure he’ll have you away from the bar and with his arm around your waist in . . . ooh, ten minutes? Fifteen, at a push.
He knows your type.
You’re uncomfortable, watching your friends go off and flirt and dance – pulling at your skirt (you’re uncomfortable in that, too), tugging your thin shirt up to cover your chest, ordering something non-alcoholic and looking morosely at it. Your eyes avoiding when men try and catch your gaze, your posture tensing – he’s pretty certain that you do not want to be here, and Toji is going to offer you an alternative that he thinks you might prefer.
You don’t notice him until he’s right beside you (people never do), leaning in against your ear, one of his arms slapping on the bar beside you, caging you in on your barstool. You start, moving back, blinking your pretty eyes at him in clear surprise, your mouth a soft ‘o’ – ah. Toji can tell you’re the kind of girl who isn’t used to male attention, who doesn’t think that you’re anything special. Shy. Probably untouched-- he’s grinning at you, and he doesn’t miss the little swallow, the flash of interest in your eyes (girls like you always like the idea of getting involved in something a little dangerous)--
“Can I buy you a drink, sweetheart?”
The voice is rough and low and dark, startling you from your reverie. Your friends have all, indeed, long gone – after sighing at you that you’re no fun, that they shouldn’t have asked you to come out with them anyway – you’re surprised by the man it belongs to, all raven hair and piercing green eyes and a scar on his lip that your eyes can’t help but trace the line of – how does somebody end up with a scar like that?
“Oh,” you bluster, feeling embarrassed and unsure by the way he’s looking at you, the easy way he throws out the pet name, the casual authority he’s emanating by how you’ve been caged. “I’m-- I don’t really--”
He chuckles.
“Me neither,” he says. “Lemme get you somethin’ soft, then--”
It would be easier, he thinks, if you had agreed – if you’d been softened a little bit by the buzz of alcohol. Still, he knows that what he gives off is heady enough that you’ll come with him anyway – he doesn’t drink himself, so he’s not exactly going to blame you for wanting to keep your wits about you. Smart thing, for all of how vulnerable you look in a short skirt and high heels and a low-cut top. He’s ordered something for you before you can refute – you can’t deny to yourself that it’s nice. It’s nice to have someone be interested in you. It’s nice, too, that said someone is rugged and six foot something with corded veins and muscle in thick biceps and forearms.
You’re staring at him, and Toji allows it, letting his own gaze crawl across your pretty face, your body, the way the cheap lights of this dive are picking out the shine in your eyes and the gloss of your lipstick.
“What’s a cute little thing like you doin’ on her own somewhere like this?” He asks you, lifting the glass to his lips. You try not to stare at them, though your stomach is twisting. You shrug, awkwardly.
“I got dragged here by some friends,” you say, inclining your head towards the dance-floor, where your friends are very much living up to their earlier assertion that they were going to have a wild time and if you weren’t going to join in, then you could just wallow in your misery.
“Ah,” he raises his eyebrows, eyes briefly brushing over where you’d indicated before returning to you. Something about the way that those eyes are pinning you like a butterfly to a cork board makes you squirm, heat curling in your lower belly. Nobody has ever looked at you like that before. This man is staring at you like he wants to take you apart, and it’s exhilarating. “You not the dancin’ sort, huh?” Another swallow. The bob in his throat is mesmerising. “Can’t blame ya. Pretty thing like you’s probably inundated with attention the minute y’get out there--”
You laugh, softly, heat rising to your cheeks. Toji can’t help but think how cute that is – you’re so obviously unaware of yourself. When he gets you on your back, he knows you’ll have that certain kind of naivety that never fails to get him hard and aching in his pants; wide eyes and bitten lips and breath dying in your throat at the touch of his teeth and hands and cock.
“Nothing like that,” you say, “I just--”
Your eyes catch something. Toji looks too, as you’re interrupted by a pretty girl tottering up to you both in an even shorter skirt and even higher heels. Her eyes linger on Toji, a fraction too long, before she turns to you and pouts and says your name, making you wince. There’s a whining tone to her voice.
She’s complaining that someone’s spilt a drink over her, and Toji sees now that her expensive-looking shirt is stained dark brown. He hadn’t noticed the scent of beer wafting from her because of the overall air of the bar is absolutely saturated in it, but now that she’s right there . . . he wrinkles his nose.
“You have to come home with me, nobody else will,” she tugs on your arm. “And you said you weren’t having fun anyway, so you can always stay there, but I need to change out of this--”
There’s a world-weary quality in your eyes. Something that suggests to Toji that you’re used to being the designated person to take care of your friends, to dropping things to clean up after them – those big eyes and the downturn of your mouth and the softness of your voice all suggest to him that maybe part of the reason you’re so demure, so . . . innocent . . . is because you haven’t had a chance to explore anything else.
Toji drapes a thick arm around your shoulders. You jump at the contact – but almost as if it’s against your will, you nestle into him. Closer to him. A prey animal knows when it’s being protected, after all – even if it doesn’t know, yet, that he’s the predator.
“We’re a bit busy here,” he says, keeping his tone affable with a knife-sharp edge. The girl opens her mouth, as if she’s going to protest – but Toji grins, his eyes darkening, his mouth tilting to show just a little bit too much teeth. He lets himself draw himself up a little taller, so that his breadth and his height and the taut muscles beneath his tight shirt are unarguable. Your friend falters, shoots you a look, and then shrugs.
“F-fine,” she says, “I’ll go on my own--”
She walks away, pouting, storm clouds rising off of her. You’re trembling imperceptibly (adorable) – he thinks this might be the first time you’ve ignored one of your friends. Eager to please little thing, he supposes – the kind of person who wants to be liked and will do almost anything to keep it that way, with big doe eyes and a trembling lip and your chest thrust out unconsciously.
Oh, he will ruin you, and you’ll thank him for it afterwards.
“Sorry if I’m oversteppin’ my boundaries there,” he says to you, and you look at him with your eyes big and wide and wet your lips, his cock giving an answering throb. You breathe very softly;
“N-no, thank you, it’s . . . it’s nice to not have to deal with them, for once--”
Toji leans further into you, his arm not leaving your shoulders – close enough that his breath tickles the shell of your ear, and your brain short-circuits at a handsome older man leaning so close and intimately to you.
“You don’t wanna stay here, though, do ya?” His other hand is suddenly on your leg, calloused fingertips brushing the soft skin of your thigh. Your heart skips a beat, your body reacting – threads of heat sewing themselves into knots between your thighs. “You wanna split?”
His eyes do not stray to the clock behind the bar, but he estimates it’s been about eleven minutes. Longer than he was expecting, but – as you bite your lip and stand up, letting his fingertips drag dangerously close to the part of you between your legs, Toji decides it’s worth it.
His place is nothing special. For a man as well-paid as he is, you’d expect something a little classier, maybe – but for a man with the kind of profession Toji Fushiguro has, he doesn’t spend much time in it. He’s too busy travelling to care about it beyond anything other than a place to crash, eat, and bring home his conquests. And you don’t seem disgusted by it as he pushes you roughly into the room, arm locking around your waist, mouth dipping to taste you – so Toji doesn’t worry about it too much.
You’re still trembling against him, your entire body thrumming with energy that you’re not used to – but that all works to his advantage. It works to the advantage of directing you into his room, until your back hits the bed with a soft ‘whoomph’ of air and Toji is kneeling over you, your eyes big and wide and blown as they look up at him.
You’d been so easy to convince back here. You’d made a couple of quiet whispers about how you shouldn’t, the way that good girls like you do – but his fingers had cupped your cheek and his body had pressed against yours and he’d smiled that dangerous knife-edge smile and you’d been putty in his hands, trembling kneed and so very adaptable as you’d walked beside him with your breath unsteady in your chest at your own daring.
Now, though, with a man’s bed behind you and a man’s cock digging into your stomach where he has you caged underneath him, things are beginning to feel far more real. You take another shuddering breath, not meeting his eyes as you whisper;
“I—I haven’t--”
Oh, fuck. If you knew what those little words did to him – if you could have heard the monster roaring in his chest at how excited he was that he’d not only get to utterly ruin you, but to get to be the first one to do it . . . He’d let himself hope, based on your way of holding yourself all demure and prim, that you’d be a virgin, but to hear it from your own lips with your skin rapidly heating up under the confession.
“That’s alright, sweetheart,” Toji practically coos at you, as his big fingers go to your shirt, tugging it off with expert precision. “I ain’t gonna break you—”
(Well. Not in any way you aren’t going to beg for.)
Breath caught in your throat as your bra is unclipped, the lacy garment dropped onto the floor. His own shirt follows – you can barely stop yourself ogling him, the firm abdominal muscles, the scars across his pectorals. You can tell, based on how many scars he’s bearing, just how dangerous the man above you must be.
The one like a starburst is a bullet scar, you’re pretty sure. The one wrapping around his side is too big to be anything but a knife or a sword – this is a man involved in something dangerous, something shady – and even that isn’t enough to get you to ask him to stop.
Staring down at your newly exposed breasts, Toji can’t resist leaning in; sucking one of your nipples into his mouth, dragging his teeth across the sensitive bud, lapping at it until your back arches and you whimper so prettily that it goes straight through him and straight to his cock. The wet kisses trail back up to your neck, blunt teeth tugging at your skin, sucking quickly stinging bruise marks into the skin so that everybody will know what this cute little virgin was up to last night--
A rough tug to your earlobe makes you moan. A nip to your lower lip makes you practically mewl. And his rough fingertips pushing up your skirt to your waist, letting his fingers dig into your plush thighs so hard that there’s no way you won’t be marked with fingerprints tomorrow – that makes you whine.
“You like bein’ pushed around a little bit, cutie?” The pet name, again, has blood rushing to your face and heat rushing to between your legs. You’re suddenly so very aware of how slick you are, how your underwear is clinging to the folds of your sex. How much of that is his fingers and how much of it is his voice and how much of it is how exposed you are in front of him, you don’t know – but you bite your lip and avert your gaze, and this just seems to spur him on. Both of you know the answer: yes. Yes, you do like being pushed around a little bit--
“These are soaking wet,” he tells you, as the matching lacy underwear to your bra is peeled off of you. He readjusts himself, grabbing your thigh and pressing your knee against your chest so that he can move his hips between your two legs as well as get a proper look at what you’ve been hiding beneath the tiny skirt – he lets out a low whistle, those green eyes greedily drinking you in like you’re a painting hung in an art gallery. “Well, look at you. Ain’t you a sight for sore eyes?”
He sees how the compliment makes you squirm at the same time as it makes your cute little hole, exposed thanks to the stretch of your leg, flutter around nothing. He might break you if he doesn’t prepare you properly; you’re so small, and it’s been a real long time since he bedded a virgin--
One of his fingers drags through your slick with no preamble, brushing your fluttering hole, and the noise catches in your throat – halfway between a whimper and a soft sigh, a noise that does not serve to do anything but make him repeat the motion, gathering your glimmering arousal on the same thick digit. He brings it to his mouth, tongue darting out to taste you.
“Mm, you should taste yourself,” he says to you, eyes glinting. “You���re like honey, sweetheart--” Toji doesn’t wait for you to say yes or no. His finger pushes past your lips, so you’re forced to taste yourself on his fingertips, brushing over your tongue. His eyes focus very deeply on you, like you’re the only thing in his orbit worth paying attention to. “Why don’t you give my finger a suck, darlin’? You’ll want it as wet as you can get it--”
Not that you’re not plenty wet enough. But there’s something so endearing about the feel of your tongue hesitantly licking at him, the shine of your eyes. If he wasn’t hard enough to cut diamonds, he would have you suck his cock first, if only to see those pretty lips wrapped around his shaft and to hear you choke a little bit, to see your makeup go runny and messy and ruined--
“Atta girl,” he says, roughly, pulling his finger out (the trail of drool sends another of those throbs of heat through him). The finger drags over your slit again, parting the plump lips – and then, he’s pushing his finger inside you, your walls pulsing around him. You’re so fucking tight. He knows you weren’t lying about being a virgin – the gasp that dies in your throat, the hand that tangles in his bedsheets, the little lift of your hips to help him along – all of those are things that are entirely sensation responses, not in the least calculated, and Toji loves that.
The finger pumps in and out of you, helped along by your slick, until he can press another alongside it and scissor them gently, stretching out your channel in preparation for what you’re going to take in a matter of minutes. Your teeth keep digging into your bottom lip, as if you’re afraid to make too much of a noise – he chuckles as he brushes your swollen clit with his thumb.
“C’mon,” he growls, “don’t hold out on me. Lemme hear you--”
Oh, you’re so embarrassed – but you’re also, he can tell, the kind of girl who can’t resist an order. You let your mouth relax, drop open – and next time his thumb rubs firmly across your clit, the noise is caught only by the ceiling above you both. He makes some little noise of praise that you can’t fully discern, because now he’s started pulling forth your pleasure he doesn’t want to stop. Three fingers. His thumb, toying with your clit, rubbing firm circles with it as he feels your channel clench and quiver around his fingers. He rubs at the textured spot on your inner walls and you groan, your other hand gripping his forearm, your brow forming sweat. Your hips are circling, needy, in search of more stimulation.
“You gonna come for me, sweetheart?” Toji asks you, his voice like cigarettes and leather. “C’mon. Let me see-- let me feel your pretty cunt clench--”
Something about the dirty words pushes you over the edge and you tumble down a dark hole, fireworks exploding inside of you, stars bursting into being behind your eyelids as pleasure washes over you in great waves. You soak Toji’s fingers, your walls sucking him in deeper and deeper.
Your breath comes in great pants, the aftershocks of your orgasm still gently rippling through you even as Toji pulls his fingers out of you. You look up at the man as he adjusts himself with his other hand, as if in a haze – and as if in a haze, when he roughly pushes those three fingers back into your mouth, you suckle on them with your mind and thoughts all misty. All you can think about is him. That’s what he wanted, anyway – cute little demure virgin, cock drunk even without him fucking you properly – he breaks girls like you on the regular, but you might be one of his favourites.
He tugs down his pants enough to reveal his flushed cock, curving to lay against his stomach, hard and leaking precome from a reddened tip. Your eyes widen (he always loves that moment), as you realise why he took pains to prepare you with his fingers.
“Whaddya think?” He asks you, teasing, wrapping his fist around the shaft. Even his big hands around it do nothing to make it look smaller, and you barely realise that you’re staring until he slaps your thighs with it, streaking his own wetness all over you. “You’ll give a man a complex, sweetheart--”
“I-I don’t have much to compare it to,” you say, desperately, heated and needy even though you literally just came. You want him inside you. You never thought you’d be so easily broken down into wanting to be fucked, but here you are – something primal inside of you is awoken by the size of his cock and the glitter in his eyes and the sculpted muscle, and you want to be desecrated. “Y-you look big--”
He laughs at that. Yeah, you definitely don’t have much to compare it to if that’s your take-away. Still. It’s cute, how you’ve spread your legs a little wider, how you’re not hiding the fact you’re looking at him like he’s some kind of angel who’s finally granted you a taste of the celestial city.
“I feel big too,” he tells you, with a smirk that rattles you to your core. “Wanna find out?”
When you nod, he grins – those big hands take a hold of your thighs, pressing both of your knees to your chest this time. He takes a moment to enjoy you in this position – those wide eyes, the lewd splay of your legs revealing the glimpse of your cunt still tantalisingly shining with the remnants of your orgasm. You squirm under his hungry gaze, exposed – and that does nothing to quell the hunger that seems to be thrumming through Toji, with every clench and wriggle.
“Good,” he tells you, rubbing his cock through the mess you’ve made of yourself, making sure the head nudges your clit and he can see the way you shiver. “You’re bein’ such a good girl for me--”
He catches on your entrance and you let out a keen. With your knees pressed to your chest, you’re unable to get a grip on Toji’s shoulders, and you have to console yourself with fisting the bedsheets beneath you (rumpled even before you’d ended up there).
The position he’s got you in means that you feel every ridge of his cock, every vein, every throb – inch by inch, as he sheaths himself slowly inside you. He can’t help but watch as your jaw goes slack, as your eyes cloud with the feeling of him entering you – as tears bead in the corner of your eyes at the burn and stretch--
Oh, fuck, the tears. He wonders if you feel the way that his cock seems to harden at that, at how pretty you look all glassy-eyed and helpless and trying to take him. He’s maybe two thirds in and almost at the limit of forward motion, but you whimper, letting your head fall back--
“P-please,” you say, “I—I can take it--”
He laughs, low and dangerous. He leans in, brushes his lips over your sweat slicked forehead. His tone is syrupy sweet when he speaks, as he angles his hips just so that he sinks another aching inch into the sweet kiss of your tight cunt.
“Oh, I know you will, sweetheart,” he murmurs, sounding almost like a threat. His eyes flash downwards, to see how tightly you’re clinging to him – how big his cock looks, disappearing into your slick sex. How the glistening ring of your need coats him. Just a bit further – watching himself claim you is almost hypnotic.
He wants to see you on your hands and knees, watch his cock stretch you out that way. He wants to see you gag and choke and drool around his cock, wants to see your small hands wrap around him, wants to have you in every position until you’re so fucked silly you can barely move--
But for now, he hilts inside of you, his balls slapping against your slick skin. His face splits into a smile as his eyes travel back up, to the bulge in your stomach that he knows is from just how big his cock is, to your thighs trembling even with him keeping them prone against you. You’re so cute. The tears have spilled past the rim of your eyelids now, wetting your cheeks – they’re so maddeningly sexy, on your pretty face. He’s not going to last half as long as he wants to, he doesn’t think – not when you’ve been driving him to distraction since the moment he laid eyes on you.
He can barely remember he killed a man less than an hour ago.
That’s old news, unimportant compared to how your walls flutter around him as he pulls out. Unimportant compared to the arch of your back, the rock of your breasts, the great gasps of air.
He’s not a kind man, but he doesn’t go out of his way to be an asshole to his conquests – so he lets you get used to the rolling rhythm of his hips, slowly. He doesn’t piston his hips in and out of you, not at first. He lets the slow drag of his cock on your sensitive inner walls make you shiver, make you gasp and moan and whimper. And only after he’s earned the light hump of your hips against his, searching for the sensation yourself, does he let himself fuck you the way he wants to.
He wants to record the moan-squeak-whimper of surprise as he begins to pump his hips in earnest. It’s a noise he’s heard before, but coming from your pretty mouth it seems all the more potent. His hips jerk into you and out of you, the noise of skin slapping against skin very loud in the bedroom. The slick noises of his cock driving in and out of your tight cunt would be shaming if it didn’t feel so good, if you didn’t get a shock of want every time his body ground against your clit on the inner thrust.
You lose track of time, with the dangerous man you met at the bar bent over you. He mouths greedily at your lips, seeming to treasure every noise you make and swallow it down his throat like a sweet candy – he bites at your neck, at your throat, the grip on your thighs never faltering for a moment. You can do nothing but let yourself be folded in half, and let him fuck you like an animal.
That seems right. He’s rutting into you deep and hungrily, almost feral in his enjoyment of your body. He drops one of your legs suddenly, letting it hit the mattress, readjusting his hips so that one of his hands can dive between you and--
He’s playing with your clit again. The pads of his fingers are rough, and you wonder if he handles a gun like the one that gave him that starburst scar. You wonder how dangerous these fingers are, the ones that were buried inside you and are now coaxing your poor, swollen clit to another orgasm.
“Come on, baby girl,” he growls, pressing harder, making your thighs jump with tension. “Wanna feel you come with my cock buried in that pretty little cunt--”
You whimper, throwing your head to the side and letting a cry out into the pillow like a mewl. Toji would be mad that you’d stifled the cute little noise, if the sight of you submissively showing him your neck (one of your softest parts) hadn’t scratched an itch for dominance inside of him – and if the feel of your body clenching and pulsating around his cock wasn’t currently finally pushing him over the edge, making him judder his hips against you as he shoots rope after rope of his come directly inside of you.
Your shoulders are heaving with the effort of the orgasm that’s still ricocheting through you, your toes curling, your body clenching and soaking Toji’s cock with your orgasm. You don’t even realise he’s come inside of you until he pulls out slightly and you wince at the feel of that same come, his load far too thick and full to not have a bit of it trickling out of your stretched hole. Toji admires the look of it; darkened from his persistent thrusts, your syrupy slick mixing with the thick pearly white of his seed.
“Y-you came inside me,” you say, your voice half-clogged with the tears that are still glistening on your cheeks (a low pulse of heat in his groin. His refractory period has always been short – and with a cute little thing like you in his bed, who can blame him for wanting to fuck you again almost immediately?). “I—I don’t even know your name--”
Oh, shit. He’d quite forgotten. He knows yours from the girl in the bar (that already feels like a lifetime ago). He can hear the uncertainty in your voice, the kind of confusion that seems to say ‘good girls don’t do this, I would never do this, who is this stranger wearing my skin with a man’s come making their thighs sticky?’. It’s part of the process of breaking that Toji loves so much.)
“Sure did, darlin’,” he says, absent-mindedly scooping some of the come that’s oozed out of you and pressing it back inside. He wins a whimper for that, one that’s definitely not ‘stop’. “You’re still so sensitive.”
If you notice he doesn’t give you his name in response to your question, you don’t say anything. As his fingers gently circle your entrance again, as his hand brushes your thigh and you shiver, he sees that you unconsciously spread your legs even further apart for his explorations. Oh, you’re so cute.
One lone finger, gently grazing your clit, makes your hips jerk, your voice break in a way that’s all needy. You look at Toji through those tear-darkened eyes, your lips bitten to puffiness, your lipstick and mascara and eyeliner all messed up on your face from crying and biting your lip and drooling. Adorable. Girls like you always look best like this, their polish scuffed when Toji’s taken them to bed and stripped away all of their defences.
Girls like you, Toji always manages to get to move their hips against his ministrations. He always manages to have them gasp, whimper, break--
You’re not the first one in his bed, and you probably won’t be the last. But as he grins at you and asks;
“Well, sweetheart. I’ll give you a choice. Y’wanna take a shower and I’ll call you a cab or somethin’ and you can head off home? Or,” he drops his voice low, drags his eyes over your prone form, brushes his lips over your stomach. They flutter against the soft skin, his breath a hot wash that makes goose flesh prickle all over you. “Y’wanna spend the night?”
And you bite your lip before nodding, nervously running your hand through his hair, your body near trembling with need--
Well. As he asks that and you answer, he really does think you might be his favourite one ever.
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scuttling · 3 years
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(Not So) Casual Friday
Fandom: Criminal Minds Pairings: Aaron Hotchner/Female Reader Word Count: 4,456 Tags: 18+, NSFW, Dad Bod Hotch (it's not a main component but he very much has the tummy here), Pining, Accidentally admitting attraction, Embarrassment, A little angst, Oral sex, Protected sex Summary: Your best friend Derek finds out about your feelings for Hotch and teases you mercilessly. You can manage it, though, until the first ever Casual Friday, when Hotch shows up to work in a black polo and jeans and you kind of ruin everything. Or maybe you don't? *Requested by anon Link to A03 or read below! “Okay, girlie, today’s the day,” Derek says when you set your bag and coffee cup on your desk on Monday morning. You shoot your best friend a tired smile and wonder for the—you’ve worked at the BAU for almost two years, so it’s probably the 500th time—for the 500th time why he has to be such a morning person when you would prefer not to have a conversation until at least 10 AM.
“Today’s the day for what?” you sigh, asking out of obligation, because it’s obvious that’s what he’s waiting for; he smiles, picks up your coffee and hands it to you, which must mean you sound bitchy. You take a grateful sip, close your eyes and exhale through your nose.
“For you to admit to me that you’re in love with Hotch.”
You spit out your coffee—only all over yourself, which is great, wouldn’t want to inconvenience Derek at all—and then cough so hard he has to thump on your back to help clear your airway.
It draws some attention; Hotch comes out of his office, takes a look at the two of you and probably regrets hiring the both of you, then walks down the stairs to make sure you’re okay.
“What happened? You’re wet,” he says a bit gruffly, looking at the coffee all over your chest and sleeves. You glare over at Derek, who’s clearly trying not to laugh.
“Derek made me spill my coffee.” You grab a handful of tissues off your desk and pat at the wet spot, trying to soak up the worst of it, but it’s not salvageable. You’ll have to change your shirt.
“And then you… choked on it?” Hotch asks, to clarify. Derek does laugh at that; the things Hotch is saying happen to have dual meanings, slightly sexual, and now that Derek knows—thinks he knows—about your thing for Hotch, it’s clear he finds it all so hilarious. He’s a twelve year old boy in a grown man’s body.
“Okay, I didn’t spill, I spit,” you correct, looking up at them, and Derek makes an exaggerated face of disapproval.
“Should have swallowed,” he says, trying to sound serious, and you shoot him an irritated look and reach out to slap him in the chest. Asshole.
“Do you need help getting cleaned up?” Hotch’s expression is kind, sweet, but you’d sooner die than have him blot coffee off of your boobs. It would be mortifying, especially in front of Derek.
“No, no, I think I’m okay. Thanks,” you add with a soft smile, and then you reach up and pull your sweater over your head, unzip your go bag, and search for another top.
For some reason, Hotch has a coughing fit scarily similar to the one you just had, and you turn to pat his back like Derek did for you.
“Are you alright?” you ask, looking up into his face, and he nods despite his watering eyes.
“Fine,” he croaks, and he leaves as quickly as he came. You sigh, because it’s not even nine and your day has already been so weird.
You’re wearing a tank top, and thankfully the coffee didn’t get through to that layer, so it’s quick and easy to throw another lightweight sweater over top of it; you ball up the wet one, shove it in the dirty clothes portion of your bag, zip it up and stash it under your desk. Derek looks like he’s having the best day of his life.
“You realize you just undressed in front of Hotch,” he says with a tone you don’t appreciate. You roll your eyes.
“I did not. I had a tank top on underneath.” You almost always wear an undershirt, because you’ve been a cop long enough to know that sometimes your clothes get torn or messed up in the line of duty, and you’re not trying to offer a free show while taking down an unsub. Derek wiggles his eyebrows, points at your chest.
“Yeah, one that put those little boobies on display. His eyes bulged out of his head like a cartoon character.” This time, you punch him in the arm, hard. It’s too goddamn early for this.
“Can you please shut up already? I don’t have a thing for Hotch.”
“Ah, I didn’t say you had a thing, I said you’re in love with him. And I have evidence; lots of it.” You tip your head back, groan, wondering what you did to deserve a best friend who is also such a pain in the ass, and it’s that moment that Hotch chooses to rejoin you; he looks a little flushed, probably from the coughing earlier.
“Uh. We have a case; I know not everyone is here yet, but you can head up to the briefing room, I’ll grab the others when they arrive.”
“Sure thing, sir,” you say easily, grabbing your tablet and what’s left of your coffee; you gesture for Derek and he follows, laughing and shaking his head. “Okay, what is it now? I’m so glad you find me entertaining today.”
“‘Sure thing, sir,’” he says with a high, breathy voice you assume is supposed to mimic yours. “You want his dick so bad.” You narrow your eyes at him as you head upstairs.
“Uh, because I was being respectful? I know that’s a foreign concept for you, the world’s biggest asshole, but you don’t have to read anything into it.” You take your usual seats at the table, pull up the note-taking app on your tablet, and Derek sits back, crosses his arms behind his head.
“Well you’re not calling me ‘sir’, and I’m the sexiest piece in the office, so it’s hard not to read into it.” You look over at him, elbow on the table, chin in the palm of your hand.
“Sexy is subjective, and you don’t do it for me, sorry to break it to you.” He scoffs, laughs, and you laugh too because you both know you see each other as brother and sister, buddies, and fellow former cops, and absolutely nothing else.
“Yeah, I get it, only Hotch does it for you; he’s not my type, but I can see how a young lady like yourself could be drawn to his brooding exterior.”
“I’m not drawn to his exterior!” you practically growl, and then you’re joined by Spencer and JJ.
“Good morning. What’s going on with you two?” JJ asks, loading up the monitors for the debriefing, her eyebrows raised.
“She’s in love with Hotch,” Derek says completely nonchalantly, and you rest your head on the table, on top of your forearms, and sigh.
“She’s what?” JJ’s whole face lights up, and you seriously regret everything.
“I’m not in love with anybody!” you mumble against your arms, and then you sit up, because you’re clearly going to have to defend yourself. “And I’d appreciate it if you quit saying that I am.”
“I told you I have evidence,” Derek reminds you, leaning back in his chair a little. One swift kick would have him toppling ass over tea kettle, but you’re too nice, even when he’s actively trying to ruin your life. “Shall I go over it while we wait?”
“I’ll be an objective third party,” Spencer says with a brief smile, and you sigh, wave your hand toward Derek.
“Alright, let’s hear it. I’m sure I have a perfectly reasonable explanation for whatever evidence you might think you have.” He grins like this is the moment he’s been waiting for, and you feel a little stupid for encouraging this.
“For one, you always look at him. When I’m delivering a profile, I notice you watching the locals, making sure they understand what we’re going over, since you're the queen of analyzing the micro expressions. But when Hotch is delivering a profile, your eyes are on him the whole time. Same goes for discussing theories on the jet; anyone else, and you’ve got your face in your tablet, scribbling notes, but you always look at him when he speaks.”
Your cheeks get hot. He’s a captivating speaker, is all, with that deep, velvety voice, and you can learn a lot from him, so you pay attention. That’s just being smart.
“Second, you tense when he gets close to you: not like you don’t want him to touch you, but like you’re halfway to jumping him already and trying to control it. I could probably put my hand in your pocket and you wouldn't even flinch, but if he leans over you to point at something you look like you’re about to cream your pants.”
“I have seen that, actually,” JJ offers, and you look over at her, betrayed. Sure, you get a whiff of his clean, crisp cologne, or feel the heat of him at your back, and your body reacts, reminds you that this is your boss and you’re at work and you can’t get turned on by the way he smells, but that’s actually a good thing, not an indicator of feelings or anything.
“Third, there’s something up with you and the gray suits. I can literally tell that he’s wearing one before I even see him, all because of the look on your face. It’s like you’re drunk on the gray suit.”
“Okay, that’s not true,” you say with a roll of your eyes—the gray suits are god tier, but there’s no way you’re that obvious—but it’s Spencer who speaks up, this time.
“You know, I have noticed that. Your pupils tend to be more dilated when his suit is gray or blue than when it’s black.” Fuck. You sigh.
“He barely ever wears the blue. It looks so good on him,” you murmur, and then you snap your eyes shut, cover your face with your hands. “Fuck. This is so embarrassing.”
“To be fair, we are profilers,” Derek says, leaning in to pat your back. “But also to be fair, he’s been a profiler longer than any of us, so if we know, he definitely knows.”
“Not helping, Derek,” you grind out, and then you’re joined by the rest of the team. Penelope takes the seat next to you, leans in with a worried tone of voice.
“Is everything okay?”
“She’s having a small crisis, but she’ll be fine,” JJ says with a smile, and you don’t miss the way Hotch looks you over when she says it, concern in his eyes. “Alright, so we’re headed to Arkansas…”
Later that morning, when you’ve been given your instructions—yours are heading to the crime scene with Emily and Derek—Hotch pulls you out into the hall, rests a gentle hand on your arm.
“Are you alright? JJ mentioned you were having a crisis earlier. This is the first time I’ve been able to get you alone, and I wanted to check on you.” You take a deep breath, look up at him, so handsome in a black suit, white shirt, green tie—he almost never wears a green tie, and you absently think it brings out the more golden tones of his eyes—and smile softly.
“Yeah, I’m fine. It’s really nothing. Personal stuff, and I’m dealing with it.” If by ‘dealing with it’ you mean you’ve been repressing it, shoving it down day in and day out until your feelings are choking you, then yeah, you’re dealing with it. “Thanks for checking, though, that’s kind of you.”
“Of course. I’m here to help in any way I can, if you need me.” Good god, do you need him, emotionally, physically, but that’s fantasy, and this, what he’s offering, is rooted in reality. Good things do happen, but not to you.
“Thanks.” Your voice is weak to your own ears, and he swallows, nods; you see Derek hovering by the door, waiting for you, and you pull away to join him, plastering a smile on your face. You don’t talk about it again until Friday, and at that point it’s extremely unavoidable.
It’s Casual Friday, newly implemented by the bureau as a way to boost morale, and while it doesn’t really excite you, because you’re fairly casual anyway, others take full advantage of it. Others, including Hotch.
He shows up to work wearing a black polo and dark jeans, his usual watch. It’s easily the most simplistic, basic outfit a man could decide to wear on Casual Friday, but this isn’t just a man, it’s Aaron fucking Hotchner, and so naturally, you lose your damn mind.
It wouldn’t be so bad if the damn polo didn’t fit him perfectly, tight across his shoulders and chest and the little tummy he has that makes you want to be under him so badly, your stomachs pressed together while he thrusts inside you, holding you tightly, his strong thighs working against yours…
“Hello, are you alive in there?” Emily asks, waving her hand in front of your face; the two of you, along with Derek, are in Penelope’s office for lunch while Rossi, Reid, and JJ are out of the office for a seminar. You blink, shake away your thoughts and hope and pray they don’t come back—but they’ll come back, they always do.
“She’s just short circuiting because of Hotch’s Casual Friday look,” Morgan says with a wink, sitting backward in his seat. “She’s been drooling so much I’ve had to follow her around with a mop to clean up after her.” You push your wheeled chair away from them with a groan, needing space and air and, potentially, a brain transplant. You’ve gotten nothing done all day long.
“Can you blame me? The man comes in here everyday, buttoned up tight, looking incredible in a suit and tie, and then he shows up in that black polo, all snug and hot and delicious, and you expect me not to freak out? You guys are lucky I didn’t pass out.” You’re met with silence, and you blink, confused, at your friends, but they’re all just kind of staring with looks of barely concealed humor. “What? It’s not like it’s a secret that I want to climb him like a tree.”
“Pretty sure it was a secret to him,” Penelope says, looking shocked, and you whip around in your chair to see Hotch standing in the doorway, wide-eyed and a little flushed.
“Oh my god. I’m so sorry. I, uh—” He raises a hand, waves you off.
“It’s okay. No harm done; thank you, for the, uh. Compliment.” He steps forward, hands a manila folder to Penelope. “Thanks for taking care of these,” he says softly, and then, unsurprisingly, he gets the hell out of there. You wish you could disappear off the face of the Earth.
“Fuck, holy fuck,” you mutter when he’s gone, leaning forward with your head in your hands. “That’s it, I’m quitting. It’s been nice knowing you guys.”
“Okay, don’t be dramatic,” Derek says, and you look up to glare at him; he’s the one that started all this in the first place. You were fine, feelings tamped down and suppressed, until he brought it up and then told everyone you know.
“Don’t tell me not to be dramatic, Derek! This is all your fault. You never respect my boundaries, you never know when to just let me be, you always have to pick and pick until you wear me down. Maybe I had a reason for wanting to keep my feelings private, did you ever think of that?”
“I know you're upset,” Emily begins softly, because there’s some pretty thick tension between you and Derek now, but you stand up, push your chair across the room, and shake your head.
“I’m not upset, I’m fucking humiliated. I’m going home; let him know I’m sick, will you?” You exhale deeply, storm upstairs and grab your stuff and drive home with tears in your eyes. You’ve never been so embarrassed in your life, and add that to the absolute heartbreak you’re feeling? You’re just happy you make it to your apartment, so you can break down with cheesecake and a sappy, romantic comedy with a happy ending: those perfect, fictional worlds are pretty much the only place one is guaranteed. You are, as planned, hunkered down on the sofa in your softest pajamas, watching You’ve Got Mail and eating the center out of an entire cheesecake with a spoon when there’s a knock at your door. You groan, pick up your cheesecake tin, and walk over to it, fully expecting it to be Derek come to beg for forgiveness for ruining your life, so it’s no surprise you drop your dessert on the floor when it’s actually Hotch on the other side.
He looks down at the tin, then up at your face, cracks the barest hint of a smile.
“I thought you were sick; I brought soup,” he says, holding up a paper bag, and your heart thumps in your chest. You wipe a hand over your face, because you haven’t been exactly neat in your heartache cheesecake consumption, and then you kick the tin across the floor and invite him in, closing the door behind him.
“I thought it was obvious that I wasn’t actually sick, just… really embarrassed,” you say when he turns back to look at you. “I can’t believe you heard all that stuff I said… I’m really sorry I made you uncomfortable.” You take the bag from his hand and invite him to follow you into the kitchen, where you set it on the counter, lean against it. He comes close, but not so close you can’t function, which is good; your comfy pajamas are shorts and a loose tank top, so you feel a little exposed already.
“You didn’t make me uncomfortable,” he says softly, and you frown, must have heard him wrong. He presses his fingertips against the counter, as if for support. “You didn’t make me uncomfortable. It was… unexpected,” he explains, “very unexpected, but I’m not uncomfortable.”
You flush hot, and you can feel the bad decision part of your brain switching on, warning bells ringing in your head.
Whatever you do next has the potential to be extremely stupid, and you would like to avoid that at all costs; you love your job, after all, despite how physically and emotionally exhausting it can be, and you love your team. Time to think with your upstairs brain only.
“That makes me feel a little better,” you say truthfully, and despite the pep talk you just gave yourself, you move closer to him like there’s an invisible magnetic force between you; you would imagine a guy like Hotch would step back, keep his distance, but he only cranes his neck a little so he can look down at you more easily.
God, he’s tall. And he smells good, and his face is perfect, and that goddamn polo...
“Good, I’m glad. I don’t want you to feel bad about this. I’m not uncomfortable, it’s not… it’s not unwanted.” You swallow audibly, looking up at him, wondering if he knows what he’s saying, what it sounds like.
“It’s not?” you ask, and it comes out breathy; he takes a small step closer to you, brushes his fingers over your arm, peers into your eyes.
“No, it’s not. I’ve been thinking of you, too; I know you know you’re beautiful, but you’re also so smart, and strong-willed, and a force to be reckoned with. I’m proud to have you on my team, and I’d be proud… to have you climb me like a tree.” He smiles again, just the barest hint of one, and you put your arms around him and pull him closer for a kiss.
One long, slow, perfect kiss turns into another, then another, and he presses your back against the counter, his hands on your face and your hands on his thick waist; you hum into the kiss, revel in the feel of his lips on yours, his tongue sweeping past them, and when you pull back for air it feels like there’s only one question that needs to be asked.
“Bedroom?” you breathe, and he nods, and you take his hand and pull him in that direction, pausing to kiss him several times before you get there. “You don’t happen to have a condom, do you?” you ask, breathless, guiding him to the bed, and he frowns, shakes his head.
“I didn’t want to seem presumptuous.” You grin at that, lean forward and kiss him, your fingers in his hair.
“I find it so hot that you even say presumptuous. I might have one here somewhere.” You open your nightstand, move around books and toys until you find a couple; you flip them over, checking to see if they’re expired, and offer him a couple options. “They’re still good, surprisingly. You can, uh. Choose the one that would work best.”
He looks them over, picks one and hands back the rest, and you throw them back in the drawer and slide into his lap, wrap your arms around his shoulders.
“I’ve wanted you for so long,” he says, holding your waist as you look down at him, completely in awe that this is happening. “But I want to clarify: if you’re looking for something casual, I don’t think we should go any further.” You inhale softly, surprised by his straightforwardness, and you lean in, kiss him slowly.
“I don’t want casual. I want to be with you.” His eyes are so brilliant, dark in the dim light of your bedroom, and he nods, presses his lips to yours and slides his hands beneath your top, guides it over your head. Then they move to your shorts, slipping them gently off your hips, and you stand so he can push them to the ground.
You’re both breathing heavily, a little rough, and you step between his legs, kiss him again, run your hands down his chest, closing your eyes with a sigh because you finally get to feel him after a year of just imagining what it would be like. After a beat, you open your eyes, look into his, smile.
“Really grateful for Casual Friday,” you whisper. “Otherwise you might never have found out I’m kind of in love with you.” You ease the polo over his head, drop it on the ground and encourage him to stand so you can take off his pants; he does, but before you can drop to your knees as planned, he takes your face in his hands, presses one soft kiss against your mouth.
“I’m more than kind of in love with you.” Oh, if that isn’t the greatest sentence your ears have ever heard… You wrap your arms around his neck, kiss a little more, forgetting that you planned to finish undressing him; when you remember, you make quick work of it, then have him lay back against the bed and settle between his legs.
You put your mouth on him because you want to, more than anything, and his hand drops to your hair, caressing you while you suck slowly, deeply, holding him with one hand and pressing against his stomach with the other. His moans are soft and gorgeous, his body tense beneath your hand, and you’d do this all night, but he murmurs your name, coaxes you up, puts his hands on your back as you settle against him.
“You’re so incredible. I never would have imagined I’d get this, get you,” he breathes, skimming his hands over your sides and hips, and you kiss softly, steamy and sweet.
“Me neither.” You lean up, make space for him to roll on the condom, and then press him inside; your breath hitches, and so does his, and you lay on top of him, chest to chest, stomach to stomach, arms around each other tightly while you move. “Hmm. Aaron,” you sigh, hair falling around him, and he groans, digs his fingertips into your hips.
“Sounds so perfect coming out of your mouth.” You smile, but it slips away when he surges up to kiss you, leans up so he’s sitting with you in his lap. He slides a broad hand up your back, wraps it around the nape of your neck, and pumps his hips up as you sink down, eliciting a series of soft, eager moans from the both of you.
“Feels like I’ve waited so long; I’ve never wanted someone as badly as I wanted you,” you tell him, chest heaving, and he brings you to him for a kiss, something a little rougher, less refined. He’s getting close.
“Never. You make me feel so much.” You reach back against his leg for support, work harder to bring him off, and when he comes he crushes his mouth against yours, delicious and more uncontrolled than you’ve ever seen him. He chants your name, so soft and sweet rolling off of his tongue, and then gets you on your back so he can press deeply inside.
You feel so incredibly full, panting beneath him, your hands on his waist and your feet on the backs of his thighs; his perfect face is inches from yours, all shallow breaths and decadent, passionate kisses, and when you climax you pull him closer, sigh, unravel completely in his embrace.
Maybe good things do happen after all. You hold each other and talk for a while, after a quick pitstop to the restroom, and then your stomach growls—understandably, since the only thing to fill it since lunch was that stupid cheesecake—and Hotch orders takeout on his phone from bed; god bless technology.
There’s a knock at the door twenty minutes later, and you know that’s quick for your favorite Thai place, but you’re not complaining because you’re officially starving. He offers to grab it, throws on his boxers and heads for the living room; after a few minutes, you wonder what’s taking so long, pull on your robe and go to check on him.
Hotch is talking to Derek, who is standing in your living room with a piece of cheesecake and a shit eating grin.
“I came with a peace offering, but now I think I’ll wait for a, ‘Thank you, Derek,’” he says, and you roll your eyes, stalk over and take the cheesecake out of his hands. You give it to Hotch, lean up to kiss Derek on the cheek, and push him toward the door.
“Thank you, Derek. Go away, Derek,” you say with a smile of your own, and he raises his palms and retreats down the hall, laughing as he goes.
This is just one more thing he’ll tease you mercilessly about, but this time the benefits outweigh the costs. Taglist ❤️: @arsonhotchner @mrsh0tchner @ssahotchie @sleepyreaderreads @mintphoenix @meghannnnnn @disgruntledchowchow @azenpal @g-l-pierce @my-rosegold-soul @ssamorganhotchner
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ayamturd · 3 years
Text
late│technoblade
summary: three times you said i love you, and the one time technoblade says it back
prompt: “I’d do anything for you, whether or not you ask me to”
warnings: fluff and major angst, blood and death descriptions, dsmp spoilers
pairing: in-game romantic!technoblade
a/n: this is my entry for @burntcilantro​‘s 500 writing event!! much love and congratulatory to min, they’re an amazing writer and an even better person (they’re so nice, give them the support they deserve)
also i separated some of the dsmp events and spaced them out (so there’s more time between for plot purposes lol)
wc: (2.0k) - m.list
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“Why are you so stupid?”
You were sat on top of a chest, holding one leg with your arms while the other was currently being wrapped by Technoblade. While you giggled at his insult, you winced once he tightened the gauze on your ankle with a glare. 
“It’s not funny, y/n.” He leaned down to bite off the rest of the wrapping, finishing the fold as you huffed at his seriousness.
“I told you to watch the house, not climb onto the roof and play a fun game of risk. What were you thinking?”
His stare was heavy and made you feel little as he looked down at you. The tone of the room changed as you lost the humor in the situation, his concern overpowered by the anger laced in his voice.
“I just wanted to help,” you stated, turning your face away, discouraged, with your arms crossed. “You’ve been getting the all the resources lately and haven’t let me even step off the damn property.”
Looking down, you fiddled with your fingers as to avoid his gaze. “I wanted to try and fix the wood panelings that have been leaking, that’s all.” 
The silence was harsh, and you swallowed deeply at how uncomfortably stiff the air became. Technoblade opened his mouth to speak but quickly closed it shut with no words to voice.
With a shaky breath, you gripped the edge of the wood and slowly lowered yourself onto your foot; you didn’t plan on staying here just so he couldn’t say anything more. Technoblade was quick to steady his arms around you in case you fell, but you immediately pushed his hand away aggressively and stood with all your weight on your healthy foot.
Arms out to balance, as you tried to take the first step on your bad foot, you crumpled into your self with a yelp from the pain and collapsed. Ready as always, Techno caught you from behind and guided you to the nearest chair. 
You flinched from the small movement but sighed once sitting again. Techno crouched in front of you to check how you physically were, but your eyes were closed shut as you tried to collect your breathing. 
“Y/n,” Techno call out. Calming yourself down, you opened your eyes to meet his; he was much more sincere before, his face soft as he spoke gently to you. 
“Hey, I’m sorry.” Looking down, Technoblade paused as to gather his thoughts before explaining himself further. 
“I know I’ve been overbearing since the attempted execution,” you reached a hand towards his cheek when he mentioned the recent event, which he leaned into as he continued with closed eyes, “but please know it’s from a place of concern. I just- I don’t want anything to happen to you. I can’t let anything happen to you. I-I…”
“I know. Trust me, I know.” You spoke for him as you pulled him into your chest, hugging his large frame as best as you could. He relaxed into your hold with a sigh of relief. 
“I love you, Techno.” You kissed the top of his head, and he only burrowed himself deeper into the hug.
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“I’m so sorry, love.”
Technoblade was hunched over on the front lawn, hands on his head while trembling from the overwhelming pain of the voices. He whimpered at your words, indicating he heard you to some extent.
He had come home, alone, and fell to his knees at the sight of you when you opened the door. Immediately, you had rushed over to him and skid to your own knees to comfort him, but he grunted from your attempts to touch him; even when under the influence, he was still conscious enough to fear for your own safety relative to the blind rage of the voices. 
You had tried talking to him, attempted to get him to give you any context to what was causing his anger, which he answered with snarling growls in return. “Tommy… left… betrayed. Chose government.” 
While broken into murmured words, you understood instantly and tried to bring him back in spite needing to quench your own anger from Tommy’s departure. You rested your palms into the snow, lowering your head as much as possible to meet his bowed head. 
You peered up at him despite his own eyes screwed shut from the unbearable chaos that roared within his head, and called out to him as softly as you could. It was a stretch, but you hoped you could soothe him down by talking.
“Hey bubs, just listen to my voice, alright? You hear me now yes? You can understand what I’m saying?” Patiently waiting, you watched him closely until he gave the smallest nod, fists still pushed against his skull and twisting from the ache. 
“That’s good, that’s really good, love. You hear my voice, now listen to my words.” Slowly, you leaned close enough to whisper to him directly. 
“I’m here, okay? I’m so sorry about Tommy, I know how much you cared for him. I still care for him too, and I know it hurts right now, but rest assured I’m still here. I’m here Techno, and I’m never leaving you.”
With clenched teeth, he let out a sob at your declaration and pushed his head against you. You took his permission to touch him promptly, gripping him with as much strength as you could carry so he felt stable and secure. 
You squeezed him, desperate to ground him from slipping further, and rocked the both of you. He released a shuttered breath, and you kissed his skin gently.
“I love you, you know? I will always be here and I’ll always love you, no matter what.”
He clutched you with his entire being, your words and presence more than he could ever ask and want. 
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“Why do you have to be too reckless for your own good?”
You grinned widely at his words, smile almost sadistic as you glanced at him with your arms propped on the axe you carried above your shoulders. 
“What ever could you mean?” Despite the roll of his eyes, he did nothing to hide his own amusement to your eagerness to the upcoming destruction you were to bring. He chuckled, his deep laughter making you smile more softly to how genuine he was as you walked besides him. Hand raised to wave his rocket launcher, he focused ahead proud. 
“We’re quite the pair, aren’t we?” Turning to look at you again, you stared at him adoringly and smirked slightly while bashful to his confident manner. “We are indeed.”
It became relatively silent as you walked through the layered snow, feet crunching from your steady pace. You continued to take random glances at him, Technoblade doing the same until you both heard a loud groan. 
“My god, you two are insufferable, I can’t deal with this right now.” Dream sneered at you specifically, as if you were the cause for his own discomfort, and walked through you both.
“I’ll meet you guys there instead, but hurry.” Swiftly, he pulled out an ender pearl and threw it a few yards ahead towards the portal, his figure disappearing altogether. 
You stared in disbelief from his actions until a cough interrupted your thoughts once more. “You know what,” Phil avoided looking at you both, his hands tapping together awkwardly as he walked ahead as well but turned to address you while moving backwards. 
“I’ll see you guys there too, just, be sure to be quick?” You both nodded wordlessly, and he took his leave in fast haste. 
Standing there alone, you risked another glance at him and met his eyes, laughing loudly at the circumstances. 
Technoblade held a hand to his face, body shaking from his laughter while you were endlessly giggling, holding your stomach from the pain. Eventually, your fits faded with large smiles, and you faced him with a shake of your head. 
“I didn’t realize we’d be one of those couples.” Technoblade sighed, though you could tell it was for play, and nodded. “A shame really, I never thought this day would come.” 
You giggled again, and chose to move closer, tilting your head upwards at him with a sweet beam while leaning onto your axe. He gave you a small smile in return, however his faded immediately after. 
Lifting his open hand, he cupped your cheek and bent down to kiss your forehead, touching yours together after with his eyes closed. “Promise me you’ll be safe? I trust you to protect yourself, but for me, stay safe when things start to go bad?”
While you knew it was impossible to guarantee you’d stay away from the majority of the danger, you knew better than to leave his concern unanswered and open. 
“I promise,” you murmured, “for you, I promise.”
He pulled you against his chest this time, engulfing you completely and holding the back of your head earnestly to his heart. 
“I love you,” you voiced, your words muffled into his armor and coat. He hummed while looking ahead, his eyes trained on the glowing portal that called towards him. This was a war he refused to leave with mercy, the price of your peaceful lives together on the line. 
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“No…”
There was too much blood. The thick liquid stained every surface and soaked through his coat that he pushed against your wound. 
Internally panicking from your tight expressions of discomfort, Technoblade desperately searched through his inventory for something, anything, that could heal or at the very least help you. He was forced to face the reality that he used all his potions during the midst of battle and combat. He couldn’t do anything. 
“Why, why why,” he snarled, his eyes clouding with an outset of tears he couldn’t care for. “Why are you so stupid.” His voice caught in his throat from his conflicted emotions and he tightened his hold on the fabric pushed against your stomach; the pain had faded at this point, and you were numb to the constant pressure he tried to hold. 
“I’m so sorry, love. I lied.” Your voice was light and strained, but Technoblade refused to accept the situation for what it was. He turned to a perched crow, screaming at it to get Phil and scaring it away with a slash of his sword, before tucking his head down in an almost silent plea. 
“Why do you have to be too reckless for your own good?” he whispered. Though he tried to be delicate, he couldn’t help how tight he held your hand. 
“I’d do anything for you, whether or not you ask me to.” You gave a tired grin as your eyes began to droop, hand tightening on his, however incredibly weak in comparison. 
“I asked you to be safe,” he cried, body stricken with grief as he abandoned his hold on your stomach and instead shakily held your face, your own blood smearing against your skin from his callous fingers. “I needed you safe.”
You placed a hand over his, using all your strength to relish in his touch and kissing the inner of his palm. “Yet you needed my love more.” 
He choked out a sob from your admittance, and pulled you into his chest, your body limp, as he rocked you slightly. “I’ll always be there for you, and love you more than I could for my own safety.”
The ruins echoed the wails of a tormented heart on the broken landscape of a haunted battlefield that called for death and devastation. The smoke and clouds of destruction reigned above, and despite the final end to the corrupted nation that was built on nothing but lies and deceit after a helpless man’s death, Technoblade couldn’t bring himself to care. 
“I love you,” he uttered, the words he struggled for oh so long to express finally free from its cage. “I love you, y/n. I love you so much.”
His words fell on deaf ears, and he screamed in agony at the truth that laid before him.
He was too late.
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