#wolf 359 headcanon

[spaceradio]

hephaestus sleepover!

[commsroom]

as an extension of how hera reads as trans to me, hera/eiffel resonates with me specifically as a relationship between a trans woman and a cis man. loving hera requires eiffel to decentralize his own perspective in a way that ties into both his overall character arc and the themes of the show.

pop culture is baked into the dna of wolf 359, into eiffel’s worldview, and in how it builds off of a sci-fi savvy audience’s assumptions: common character types, plot beats, or dynamics, why would a real person behave this way? how would a real person react to that? eiffel is the “everyman” who assumes himself to be the default. hera is the “AI who is more human than a lot of humans,” but it doesn’t feel patronizing because it isn’t a learned or moral quality; she is a fundamentally human person who is routinely dehumanized and internalizes that.

eiffel/hera as a romance is compelling to me because there is a narrative precedent for some guy/AI or robot woman relationships in a way i think mirrors some attitudes about trans women: it’s a male power fantasy about a subclass of women, or it’s a cautionary tale, or it’s a deconstruction of a power fantasy that criticizes the way men treat women as subservient, as property. but what does that pop culture landscape mean in the context of desire? If you are a regular person, attracted to a regular person, who really does care for you and wants to do right by you, but is deeply saturated in these expectations? how do you navigate that?

I think that, in itself, is an aspect of communication worth exploring. sometimes you won’t get it. sometimes you can’t. and that’s not irreconcilable, either. it’s something wolf 359 is keenly aware of, and, crucially, always sides with hera on. eiffel screws up. he says insensitive things without meaning to. often, hera will call him out on it, and he will defer to her. in the one case where he notably doesn’t, the show calls attention to it and makes him reflect. it’s not a coincidence that the opening of shut up and listen has eiffel being particularly dismissive of hera - the microaggression of separating her from “men and women” and the insistence on using his preferred title over hers. there are things eiffel has just never considered before, and caring for hera the way he does means he has to consider them. he's never met someone like hera, but media has given him a lot of preconceptions about what people like her might be like.

there’s a whole other discussion to be had about the gender dynamics of wolf 359, even in the ways the show tries to avoid directly addressing them, and how sexual autonomy in particular can’t fully be disentangled from explorations of AI women. i don’t think eiffel fully recognizes what comments like “wind-up girl” imply, and the show is not prepared to reconcile with it, but it’s interesting to me. in the context of transness (and also considering hera’s disability, two things i think need to be discussed together), i think it’s worth discussing how hera’s self image is at odds with the way people perceive her, her disconnect from physicality, how she can’t be touched by conventional means, and the ways in which eiffel and hera manage to bridge that gap.

even the desire for embodiment, and the autonomy and type of intimacy that comes with it, means something different when it’s something she has to fight for, to acquire, to become accustomed to, rather than a circumstance of her birth. i suppose the reason i don’t care for half measures in discussions re: hera and embodiment is also because, to me, it is in many ways symbolically a discussion about medical transition, and the social fear of what’s “lost” in transition, whether or not those things were even desired in the first place.

hera’s relationship with eiffel is unquestionably the most supportive and equal one she has, but there are still privileges, freedoms, and abilities he has that she doesn’t, and he forgets that sometimes. he will never share her experiences, but he can choose to defer to her, to unlearn his pop culture biases and instead recognize the real person in front of him, and to use his own privilege as a shield to advocate for her. the point, to me - what’s meaningful about it - is that love isn’t about inherent understanding, it’s about willingness to listen, and to communicate. and that’s very much at the heart of the show.

[harpoonsandmusicals]

It’s pride month, have my random queer w359 headcanons!

Hera is trans. Obviously. Sexuality wise, I don’t think she’s really met enough people to tell for certain. Her feelings for Maxwell were very strong, were they romantic? Does she really know what that means? She’s working on that one.

Eiffel is aromantic bisexual and completely clueless about that fact. He fully believes romance was made up for the movies and that all dudes find other men a little hot. He is painfully cisgender.

Minkowski’s gender is a little masc and spicy but mostly cis as well. She read a book on how to support your trans coworkers and it honestly made her worse and more awkward instead of helping. She’s aware that she’s bi but trying not to think about it. Being ok with other people being bi is not the same as being ok with herself being bi

Hilbert sold his gender and sexuality to clear space in his brain for more science

Lovelace is very very lesbian and also the only one of the crew who is actually engaged with the queer community. She went from her very queer original crew to these disasters and is having a terrible time trying to figure out how to explain what aro is to Eiffel. Her gender is lesbian. She’s probably cis but I can see reading her as trans too

[topayitfoward]

Doug Eiffel would cry to Hera for hours about a tummy ache btw

[flame-cat]

doug eiffel has adhd.

he doesnt know it. he doesnt know it for most of his life, anyway. he knows he has trouble focusing and sitting still, knows that if a topic doesn't interest him he tunes out immediately. he knows that just like he knows hes capable of working on fine-tuning a satelite dish for 9 hours straight in the hot sun and only noticing how long its been when he nearly falls off the roof because hes dizzy from heat exhaustion.

these are just quirks of his. little things. things that made kate go "oh, doug," and ruffle his hair. that made anne point and laugh at how silly her dad is.

once.

anyway. he doesnt know it, and its not relevant. so he doesnt find out.

until...

"officer eiffel. officer eiffel!"

"gah! hera! for gods sakes, warn a guy before you send him into cardiac arrest!"

"i... did warn you. ive been trying to get your attention for the past... 30 minutes."

"you... have?"

"i have. i understand youre hyperfixating, but commander minkowski really needs you to report to the bridge."

"yeah, yeah, in a min... wait. im what-now?"

"uh... hyperfixating?"

"okay, yeah, that. what the hell does that mean? if youre making up words to insult me now, youve gotta at least tell me what they mean!"

"... eiffel, do you not know what hyperfixating is?"

"uh, yeah? kinda what i just said?"

"um. well. hyperfocus is an intense form of mental concentration or visualization that focuses consciousness on a subject, topic, or task. in some individuals, various subjects or topics may also include daydreams, concepts, fiction, the imagination, and other objects of the mind."

"okay, webster's, now can we get the normal people explanation?"

"you were really, really focused. to the point where it was like nothing else around you existed."

"oh. i mean, i guess? but what makes it 'hyper?'"

"well, people dont normally focus that intently on a task or topic. its generally a behavior exhibited by those on the adhd or autism spectrum."

"... huh?"

"officer eiffel, youre aware that you have combined type adhd, yes?"

"... what?"

"oh boy. um, hang on, commander, this might be a minute..."

[hephaestuscrew]

I'm a big fan of the way that Gabriel Urbina often includes details within the Wolf 359 scripts that can't be directly translated into audio, for example: the "tears silently streaming down [Minkowski's] face" in Ep31 Securité; Eiffel being "wrapped up in a blanket" when telling Lovelace about his traumatic experience of feeling like he was turning into Minkowski in Ep32 Controlled Demolition; the way "Hera and Eiffel stand together, his arm around her shoulder" when confronting Pryce in the finale; the idea that Eiffel "salutes" Minkowski after his speech to her before the memory wipe... These details make reading the scripts an even more rewarding experience. 

But I do think there's an interesting question here about to what extent these details are canon. After all, when changes have been made in the dialogue between the script and the final recording, I only consider the dialogue that actually ended up in the episode to be canon, although the version in the script might still provide interesting insights. But with details in the scripts that are inherently not audible - and therefore never intended to be literally included in the episode itself - should we consider them to be canon, or bonus content, or Word of God, or simply a tool used in the recording process? 

I know that it is possible to have an entirely full experience of the show without ever reading a single bit of the scripts. The scripts are placed in the 'Extras' area of the show website. 

Obviously the primary purpose of the non-auditory script details is to inform the actors in their performances, and perhaps provide some considerations for sound design. When I read the scripts, I can often feel how the non-auditory script directions are reflected in the feel of the voice acting. 

But once I've noticed these script directions, I also can't help having them feed into my experience of the scene when listening, in a way that enriches the experience beyond purely the audio, and informs my understanding of these moments. The script directions tell us more about what the writer was envisioning for a scene.

I love sharing the script directions that feel significant to me, and when I do so, I feel like I'm sharing something more significant than a behind-the-scenes tidbit. I feel like I'm sharing further knowledge of what happened in that scene. The script directions feel like a true part of the show to me, more so than the comments the writers and actors have made in Q&As. To me, these non-auditory bits of the scripts feel like canon, but a slightly lesser form of canon than the episodes themselves. But I don't know if I can fully justify this view. I'd be interested to hear other people's thoughts.

[sashasparrow]

nobody understands that i'm referencing something when i say "details, please" in w359 voice so instead i just sound mean. worth it tho.

[crossguild]

things about lovelace that are canon:

went to west point

played basketball in high school and college

basketball career cut short because of a car accident that shattered her knee

deployed in iraq

born & raised in brooklyn, NY

broke her wrist trying (unsuccessfully) rescue mason fisher in an asteroid shower

brilliant tactician, has problems with authority

described as 'both a workaholic and a prankster'

dad is a district judge, her mom was a marine

both a career military woman and a staunch liberal

the only thing about lovelace the fandom seems to talk about:

lesbian

also she's very hot

... like listen. my point here isn't that no one should headcanon her as a lesbian (i do most of the time as well!) or find her hot (i also do this), it's that it's just very obviously something primarily white fandoms do to characters of color, to project their own non-canon experience onto them rather than relating to the character on the things that are explicitly canon about them. it's also highkey fetishistic when all people can talk about with her is how she's a lesbian and they find her hot.

like, non-polish fans can relate to minkowski's desire to be taken seriously and fit in, which are things she actually has. people who aren't white men from texas are capable of relating to eiffel's self esteem and impulse control issues, which he actually has. people who aren't AIs are capable of sympathizing with hera's struggles with anxiety and disability, and extrapolate on her experiences on her terms, without projecting their own. what is it like to be a disembodied voice whose best option for 'friend' still doesn't hold you in high enough regard to not call you derogatory nicknames?

why are white fans so deeply incapable of taking isabel sofia lovelace as a character in her own right and analyzing her as she is without projecting their own experiences onto her?? why do i never hear anyone talk about how her relationship with her dad and her mom might have influenced both her decision to join the military and her political views? or about like. fucking literally anything about her that isn't predicated on their attraction to her? can we get maybe a mention of the all-but-diagnosed ptsd? that's a rhetorical question. we know why.

[theonlymadmanonmars]

If I had a nickel for Everytime I kinned a podcast character With identity issues and A missing arm I'd have two nickels which isn't a lot but it's weird that it happened twice.

[vertical-suns]

april 7, 1987

a one-shot i wrote regarding the fact that warren kepler's official playlist contains themes of poverty and abandonment.

(tw: child abandonment, mentions of child kidnapping)

It is April 7, 1987, and Warren James Kepler is walking home from school. 

He has the same red backpack he wore in kindergarten, and he struggles to zip it up every day, but Mrs. Szyack helps him. There’s a hole worn into the bottom right corner of the bag where his plastic folders have dug into it. “Plastic is good,” his mother had said in that way of hers, like she was trying to be gruff but couldn’t quite cross the line. “It will last you a long time. Worth the investment.” 

Warren didn’t know what ‘investment’ meant, but he had pulled apart the yellowed pages of their dictionary to find out. 

The definition hadn’t helped much. 

There’s an old, stained patch on the upper right side of his backpack, a good few inches above the water bottle compartment on the side– or, where it should have been, if the frayed edges were anything to go off of. The stain had been there since the day he had gotten his backpack, and it would stay there until the day he outgrew it. 

Though, that was approximately 734 days ago, when the straps had to be detached and given an extra strip of fabric, leftover scraps from a blue t-shirt that was simply unfit to be worn anymore. 

The backpack has a streak of yellow on it, now, across one of the straps, made as Warren had pulled it off of its hook on the wall. It matched the yellow smudged across his fingertips, the yellow of the paint slowly drying on a wrinkled page that Warren held with too much caution. Sunflowers– or as close as he could get to sunflowers– were pressed onto the printer paper, petals indented with his fingerprints. It wasn’t as neat as Jen’s, or as colorful as Mikey’s, but it was his.

It is April 7, 1987, and Warren James Kepler is 9 years and 11 months old. 

Warren only knows this because his father had lowered the calendar on the fridge, and shown him a magic trick– with only a flip of a page, it was his birthday. 10. The big double digits. Warren had asked Santa for a new backpack, and had received a letter back that he wouldn’t just get any backpack– he’d get a new, bright red, stain-free backpack. Under one condition: that he turned ten years old, and behaved well for his parents until then. 

Every night, Warren unfolded the note, reread it, neatly folded it, and slid it back underneath his pillow. 

Every day, Warren picked up the broom and dustpan from the corner, and swept until he was certain he didn’t miss a single spot. 

Every evening, his mother and father trailed in crumbs and dirt and dust and complained about how filthy their apartment was. A sharp, biting comment about James Kepler’s salary. A snide retort about Anne Kepler’s housekeeping. Then, one of two things would happen. 

A bout of silence would fall. His parents would sigh, remember he was there, and the topic would switch to his day. The short stories he read in class– had he gotten to speak aloud today? What was this of the Great Chicago Fire– they had never heard of it, he should tell them! Settle around the dining table. Talk until Mom set dinner in front of them. On Fridays? Warm, cooked food. Fridays were Warren’s favorite. 

What were his times tables? What’s 9 times 5? Good! Don’t lean your elbows on the table, Warren. Dot the crumbs off the side of your face. What else did you learn? Guide him to the bathroom. Make sure he brushed his teeth, washed his face, showered, shampooed, dried off. Help him into bed. Tuck him in. Kiss his forehead. Goodnight. 

The second option was worse. Comments evolved into rants evolved into shouts. Warren slunk away those days, tucking himself in the dark corner between the fridge and the cabinets if he couldn’t make it to his room in time. Fall asleep there. Wake up with a painful ache in his neck, dust bunnies on his clothes. Watch Mom leave his room in the morning, yawning and rubbing the crust out of her eyes from sleep. 

It is April 7, 1987, and Warren James Kepler is almost home. 

The walk home is as safe as can be for a nine-year-old in the South Side of Chicago. 

His classmate walked the first block with him a few months ago. Warren hasn’t seen him anywhere since, other than the side of a milk carton. David Hart. H and K were close enough in the alphabet that Kepler had always ended up at the same table as him. Now, Amy Grintz sat at David’s seat. 

It had only been left open for a few days. 

His parents always turned that side of the milk carton away from him. 

Kepler always turned it back. He liked reading. He liked the pictures. He liked getting to know as much as he could. Memorizing it. “Last seen a block from Washington Elementary. Please contact if you have any information.” He tried calling, once. Mentioned that David wore a green coat with a white stripe down the sleeves. Told them that David's favorite color was orange, that he wanted to be an astronaut one day. 

They told him not to call that number again if he didn’t have anything serious to say. 

It is April 7, 1987, and Warren James Kepler opens the door to his family’s apartment. 

They have what his mother irritably calls a “popcorn ceiling,” huffing and puffing at how the “dirt just catches on every inch of it!” Warren has never seen the problem– he thought popcorn was a good thing, even if the ceiling doesn’t look much like it. 

The paint is chipped and yellowing at the edges, like the bill stuck to their fridge. A lot of things are chipped: the floorboards right at the entrance, a rug thrown over it to cover it up. The left side of Warren’s seat at the dining table. The corner of their countertop. Warren likes them. Likes running his hands along them, feeling the difference in texture. They’re comforting. A reminder that this is his family’s apartment, not the Wise’s or the Brandt’s. Kepler’s. Anne, James, and Warren Kepler’s. 

It’s a Tuesday. On Tuesdays, his mom has an early morning shift, and comes home, puts the TV on, and is asleep on the couch by the time Warren gets there. 

The TV is not on. In fact, it’s not even there. There’s a square of clean floor where it once was. Where the couch was. Where the bookshelf was. 

There’s not a single piece of paper on the fridge. Warren glances down at the sunflowers in his hands. There’s not a magnet on the fridge– not even the yellow one that Warren had wanted to use to pin his artwork up. 

The paper slips out of his hands, floats gracelessly to the floor, and lands face down. 

Warren steps forward, and his sneakered foot almost catches on the chip in the hardwood. There’s no rug to protect him, but he manages to stay upright, anyways. He walks to his parents room. He checks the closet. Another dark square where the bed had been and the dust couldn’t settle. His room. 

His room. 

He checks the closet. He pinches himself, hard, then takes his right hand and settles it over his forearm, twists until it’s bright red and he can’t help his eyes from watering. 

He doesn’t wake up. 

The laundry room. The bathroom. Behind the shower curtain, below the sink. The space between the fridge and the cabinets. He opens every drawer. Every cabinet. He steps outside– they had left the doormat out in the hall. He can hear the grittiness of the straw, reads the 'Welcome!’ upside-down, and bursts into tears. 

It was April 7, 1987, and now it is April 7, 2003. 

Though, you wouldn’t know that if you walked into Major Kepler’s office. 

The date is scratched out on the calendar. The picture frames on his desk are turned down. There’s a piece of electrical tape over the corner of his computer. There’s a half empty bottle of whiskey on the desk, and every piece of paperwork that day is signed as the eighth. 

It was April 7, 1987, and it never will be again.

[officer-achilles]

I think Dr. Hilbert perpetually smells like antiseptic whereas Minkowski smells virtually like nothing or perhaps nothing with a hint of peppermint shampoo or something. Eiffel canonically has stinky guy syndrome (which I think is less a hygiene issue and more just how he is). Hera cannot have a smell unless you count the smell of the Hephaestus itself.

Keppler smells like expensive cologne with a dumb pretentious name like 'Whiskey on the Rocks' or some shit. Jacobi smells faintly like cheap axe deodorant. Maxwell smells like cherry blossom body mist from Bath and Body Works.

Lovelace smells pretty neutral at almost all times, and will occasionally smell like shea butter shampoo or conditioner but that's about it.

Mr. Cutter smells faintly of clean medical equipment but with expensive cologne slathered on top of it to obscure the medical smell. Also he smells faintly like plastic, think fresh out the box Barbie Doll.

Pryce does not smell like anything. She dealt with her sweat glands ages ago and thus does not worry about body odor. If she smells, it is the scent of science.

Rachel Young smells like coffee and expensive perfume (gifted to her by Mr. Cutter).

[woof359]

Doing a relisten and I’m fascinated to hear that Doug’s crate was Bolted to the Floor TM and yet he thinks it got ejected into space. Like of all the crates that’s the only one that should be still there.

I have a theory that they had to seal off the storage room permanently because it couldn’t be repressurized with a canon hole in the wall. So they watched A LOT of cargo get dumped into space, Santa letters included, but they can’t redo an inventory of what didn’t fly out into space in a room without oxygen. They’d do a space walk about it and Renee being the only one who’d really care to do that, is so inebriated during this fiasco that they probably don’t actually go in to see what’s left.

His box is bolted down. It’s still there.

And what is in it: The sound of a beating heart? Freezing cold? Emphasis on Reserved? Hmm.

As I remember we never come back to box 953, (I’m also right now years old and realizing that number is 359 backwards…) but it gives a little foreshadowing I feel, knowing about Eiffel’s refreeze adventure down the line. And that could be all it is, just another instance of the station being weird…

But with the existence of Hilbert’s room, I feel that what Goddard Futuristics left for Eiffel might be more significant. It’s something that like the chair, might be intended for Eiffel being alone. Then again, it’s not meant to be opened.

What thing with a beating heart should he never open?

[imreallyonthishellsite]

characters who are black bc I said so

just so yall know I'm using black as an umbrella term, if any yall want to chime in with different ethnicities you are welcome too 💜🤎.

☆The Warner Siblings - Animaniacs

☆Saiki Kusuo & Aiura Mikoto - TDLOSK

☆Tanjiro & Nezuko Kamado & all of the Hashira no exceptions - Demon Slayer

☆Cuphead, Mugman, King Dice- Cuphead game/show

☆Izuku Midoriya, Mina Ashido, Snipe, Miriko, Oboro Shirakumo, Rody, Hatsume Mei, Aizawa Shouta- My Hero Academia

☆Noe Archiviste, Dante - Case Study of Vanitas

☆Douglas Eiffel, Isabel Lovelace, Renee Minkowski, Jacobi, and Maxwell - Wolf 359

☆Sans & Papyrus Skeleton - Undertale

☆Izumi Curtis - Fullmetal Alchemist

☆Pinkie Pie, Twilight Sparkle, Fluttershy, Rarity, Sweetie Bell, Sunset Shimmer, Luna, Celestia - My Little Pony

☆Gideon Nav, Harrowhawk Nonegemius - The Locked Tomb

☆Sonic, Shadow, Tails, Knuckles, Blaze, Amy, Silver, Rouge - Sonic Franchise

☆Percy Jackson, Annabeth Chase, Grover Underwood, Grace siblings, Di Angelo siblings, Magus Chase, Rachel Elizabeth Dare, Anubis, Paul Blofis - Riordanverse

☆Afton Family - Five Nights at Freddy

☆Jason Todd, Clark Kent, Koriandr, Rachel Roth, Stephanie Brown - DC Universe

☆Pines Siblings - Gravity Falls

☆Hamato Siblings - Rise of The Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles

☆Ralsei, Kris, Noelle, Susie, Lancer, Joxter - Deltarune

☆Blossom, Bubbles, and Buttercup - The Powerpuff Girls

☆Brozone, Poppy, Funk Trolls, Brab, just most of the trolls in general- Trolls DreamWorks

☆Onyx - Trollz 2005

☆E. Aster Bunnymund - rotg

btw if if I get any type of racist comments on this or complaints abt "blackwashing" you can smd 😊, I'm not fighting with yall over headcanons alright

[harpoonsandmusicals]

This came out months ago and yet I’ve seen nobody talk about it?!?

PUPPET EIFFEL AND HILBERT GUYS!!!

[topayitfoward]

W359 Fandom you make me want to sob and cry and pull at my hair with the HEADCANONS. WITH THE INTERPRETATIONS. IM SICK!!!! PUT YOUR ELECTRONICS AWAY!!!!

[yourfaveisafearavatar]

Daniel Jacobi from Wolf 359 is an Avatar of The Desolation.