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haikyuuthots · 3 years

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hi there! i’ve been a follower for awhile but i’m asking this anonymously bc i dont feel like exposing myself lol. but i was wondering if i can get an emergency request. i have been in quarantine for a year (since March 12-so almost a year) because i’m considered a high risk person during the pandemic, and i’ve been quarantined with my parents who can be extremely toxic at times. On top of that, I’m a full time college student and am experiencing burnout and am just overall at an extreme low right now. It’s just pilling on top of one another and is just weighing so heavily on me—i’m not sleeping, i’m barely able to focus and i’m just in such a self-hatred state of mind because of my parents and school. I just feel like its too much at this point and I just want everything to pause for a moment so i can breathe for even just a moment. If it isn’t too much trouble can I just get Ushijima (and/or Sakusa or honestly anyone you want to add) and how they would help out their s/o? thank you so much, your writings make my day brighter so please keep up the good work :)

A/n: Thank u so much for trusting me enough to help u feel better. This is for u love, i know life can be so hard, I truly hope you feel better soon, please if u ever feel comfortable enough to talk, don’t hesitate to message me!❣️i appreciate u, more than u could ever imagine. Thank u! Hope you enjoy this 🤍

Warnings: talk about being sad and stressed, but not very explicit.

Characters: Ushijima Wakatoshi & Sakusa Kiyoomi

For the first time in a while, nothing in the world mattered. - Ushijima Wakatoshi

———————————————————

Life was overwhelming, it truly was. The more you thought about how many issues you had the more stressed you got. The last thing you wanted was to be consumed by this negative energy, you hated it and all you wanted to do was stop feeling this way but the more the days passed the more evident it got that you weren’t feeling like yourself, and your boyfriend was the first to notice your change in attitude. Ushijima was very observant, he rarely ever said much but the minute he realized you were down he wanted to do everything in his power to lift your spirits up. He would do anything to see a genuine smile on your face again.

You were surprised to see you boyfriend when you woke up Tuesday morning, making breakfast in the kitchen usually by this time he’d be gone, training for the majority of the day.

“Toshi? What are you doing?” You asked, a bit confused by the sight in front of you.

“Y/n, love, I’m making you breakfast.” He says lifting up the pan a little, showing you the scrambled eggs.

You giggle a bit, “yeah baby I see that, but I mean what are doing here now? Shouldn’t you be at practice?”

Ushijima lowers the heat on the pan and makes his way over to you, “i asked for today off, I want to be with you.”

You’re looking up at him with a shocked face “w-hat, why?”

He’s cupping your face, looking down at you lovingly “I love you. You don’t have to say anything now, but it’s been hard to ignore how down you’ve been I just want to be here with you, because I will always be with you, no matter what.”

Your vision begins to blur form the tears that are threatening to come out, you roughly wrap your arms around his body, and nuzzle your face into his chest. He holds you tightly, resting his chin on your head.

“I’m just- so tired. I feel like everything is falling apart.” You barely whisper out, tears prickling down your face.

Ushijimas heart breaks at the sound of your voice, but he tries his best to keep a strong tone, for your sake.

“Love, I’m here for you. Today, tomorrow, and every day after that. I won’t ever let you feel this alone.”

He pulls away, slightly wiping your tears, smiling down at you “I made you your favorite, would you like to eat now?”

You smile up at him, before you answer you give him a small peck on the lips “yes. I would love to eat with you.”

Your boyfriend spent the rest of the day by your side. He planned out all your favorite activities, starting with going to the movies, later getting frozen yogurt, and finally going to your favorite pond to feed the ducks. During that entire time you forgot about everything that negatively weighed on you, you were beyond grateful for Ushijima , because for the first time in a while, nothing in the world mattered. He kept his word too, every day he never failed to remind you that he was there and he would always be there, for you, for anything you ever needed.

I’ll be here for you, til’ the end. - Sakusa Kiyoomi

——————————————————

It was 4Am and you rolled over again, looked like it would be another sleepless night. You couldn’t remember when the last time you got a good 8 hours of sleep was. It seemed that the stress of everything going on your life was specifically haunting you at night.

Looking over you see your boyfriends sleeping figure, you sigh thinking about how disappointed he’d be if he saw you awake at this hour. You quietly head over to grab your phone, trying to distract your negative thoughts by watching videos. After 15 minutes youre startled by your boyfriends sleepy voice

“y/n? Why are you up?”

“I can’t sleep, but don’t worry about it, you just go back to sleep oomi.”

You resume your video, watching until a hand begins hovering over the screen and your boyfriend briefly snatches your phone away from your hold

“Oomi, what?” You asked a bit confused,

Sakusa is now sitting up as he turns on the lamp beside your nightstand, he’s more awake now, gently rubbing his eyes

“Baby. What’s wrong?” He asks you,

“N-nothings wrong, I just can’t sleep tonight. But I’m okay.” You try your best to fake a smile, in hopes to not worry your boyfriend, but he knew you like the palm of his hand, he could tell when something was wrong.

Looking at you, more intensely he gently runs his finger under the bags under your eyes “you haven’t been sleeping have you?”

You audibly gasp at his realization, “I-I’m trying too, I am but”

“Why didn’t you tell me?” Concern is laced all over his words

“I-I, just didn’t want to worry you.” You’re looking down as tears start falling down your face

Sakusa is looking at you with soft eyes, immediately he brings your body towards his and engulfs you into a hug. He’s holding you tightly as he speaks

“It’s okay, you’ll be okay.”

You continue crying on him, as you release your built up frustrations. He made it easy to cry, you couldn’t keep wishing things would be different, you’ve been so hard on yourself lately, but Oomi here comforting you was all you needed to help relieve that.

You two stayed in that position for a few minutes before you finally regained your composure, Sakusa holding you the entire time.

Finally pulling away he wipes your tears, looking deeply into your eyes

“I love you, you’re my entire world y/n. And I’ll be here for you, til the end, anytime you need me. Please never forget that”

You smile at his genuine words. Sakusa leans down to connect his lips with yours, kissing you lovingly.

Pulling away, Sakusa finds the remote control turning the tv on. You’re a bit confused by his actions

“Wh-?”

“I won’t fall asleep until you do.” He cuts you off, his eyes still looking at the tv.

“Kiyoomi , don’t do-“

He looks back at you, “I mean it, I’m staying up with you, until you’re asleep.”

And he did, he didn’t sleep until he made sure you did first. Every night after that, he made sure to stay up with you until you slept, not only that but he was very attentive with anything you needed, caring for you, listening to you and reassuring you that you’d be fine. You were beyond thankful for him, because your boyfriend showed you time and time again that he would do absolutely everything to make sure you were aware at the fact that you were never alone.

#haikyuu x reader #haikyuu #haikyuu blog #haikyuu imagines #haikyuu! x reader #haikyuu!!#haikyuu boys #haikyuu x y/n #sakusa kiyoomi x reader #ushijima wakatoshi #ushijima wakatoshi x reader #kiyoomi sakusa #sakusa kiyoomi drabbles #ushijima Wakatoshi drabbles

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catrasredemption-moved · 4 years

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I'm really struggling and hurting with what's going on in the fandom right now as im losing the only comfort i had in quarantine. could you please write something happy post-s5 catradora based on noelle's statement that once Adora realises she's in love with Catra she'd be SO into the reslationship?

((I get you, Nonners <3 *hugs* Again, white af, so I’m going to limit my comments, but - it isn’t all downhill from here. Try not to give up)) (((Disclaimer it’s almost 4am and my sleeping meds are kicking in, so I’m sorry if this isn’t completely coherent)))

Adora had never half-assed anything in her life.

And she’d be damned if she was going to start now, at a time when being fully on her game was more important than ever.

“I just want to do something for her!”

Bow practically had hearts in his eyes. Glimmer was a little less impressed. “I’m pretty sure if you just stayed in bed and napped together all day, she’d be happy.”

“I know, I know.” Adora sighed. “But that’s not - I want to do something good. Like, really show her that I love her.”

“Take a vacation.”

“Glimmer!”

“What? I’m serious,” Glimmer insisted. “If you just like... took an entire week off to do nothing but spend time with her, she’d probably be speechless. Which I would pay to see, by the way.”

Adora frowned, thinking it over. It was true that Catra would probably be floored by Adora taking a week off, no need for She-Ra or anything, just for her.

“I don’t know. Do you think it’s enough? What should we do? What do people do on vacation?”

“You could just travel?” Bow suggested. “You know, get as far from Bright Moon as you can then call Glimmer for a ride back or something when you’re done.”

It was... actually a good idea, Adora thought. They’d spent their whole lives in the Fright Zone wondering what was beyond the Whispering Woods. They could actually see things now. They could see a world full of magic!

The happy thoughts died almost as quickly as they had started. “I... I dunno. I mean, it sounds great, but that would take more than a week, and-”

“Take a month,” Glimmer encouraged. “Take six months, honestly. You guys saved the universe. If anyone’s earned time off, it’s you.”

“That’s a lot of time.”

“And you’ve earned it,” Bow assured her. “Maybe not six months - I mean, you should take six months but I know that would drive you nuts. But take a month. Go places. Spend time together. I think it’d be good for you guys.”

Adora chewed on her thumbnail for a moment before slowly nodding and smiling. “Yeah. Okay.”

This whole thing had started with Catra not feeling like a priority in Adora’s life, after all. A month together would be the perfect way to show Adora she was invested and she cared. Perfect. * * * * * * * * * * * * Catra didn’t get back to Bright Moon that night. “Your cat passed out on my couch,” Mermista informed Adora flatly, turning the screen so Adora could see Catra curled up in a tight ball, sleeping.

“Is she... okay?”

“She’s dumb. Sea Hawk found her almost sick with heat stroke and had to drag her away from the house she was working on.”

Adora’s heart jumped to her throat. “She’s... She’s really trying hard to help with Salineas.”

“And I appreciate it,” Mermista admitted in a rare moment of genuine honesty. “But I’ll appreciate it less if she kills herself in the process. If she’s going to die, I should at least get the first shot.”

“Glimmer can come get her, if you want.”

“Nah, she already feels like hell. She can sleep it off on the couch.”

Adora scrubbed her eyes, smiling weakly. “Thanks, Mermista. Sorry, I guess I should’ve warned you, she gets really intense when she actually puts effort into things.”

“She’s not someone I would’ve pegged for a workaholic. Want me to wake her up to say... I dunno, good night or whatever you guys say to each other?”

“Nah, let her sleep.” Adora wanted Catra home, wanted to talk to her about a vacation, but she was sleeping, and that was more important than anything. She’d been exhausting herself for nearly a month working on Salineas. And while it was earning her some begrudging tolerant will with Mermista (who firmly believed actions were better than any apology Catra could ever say), Adora was worried. A vacation would really do her some good. * * * * * * * * * * * * Glimmer and Adora went to Salineas the next morning to get Catra. They thought it was reasonable to assume she was still sleeping off the heat stroke at the palace.

“Nope, she took off before I woke up,” Mermista said flatly when they found her. “Sea Hawk tried to find her, but he’s not exactly subtle about it, so she probably had plenty of time to hide.”

“Great.” Adora sighed, pinching the bridge of her nose. “I’ll... track her down.”

“Tell her if she’s going to keel over to get out of my kingdom. She can die on Bright Moon’s turf.”

“Tell her not to die,” Glimmer added.

“Yes, and yes.”

Mermista pointed Adora in the direction of where they’d found Catra yesterday. She approached a half built house, quietly climbing up the ladder at the side and finding Catra working on the roofing.

“Seriously?” she asked, resting her arms on the edge of the roof. Catra looked up, surprised.

“What?”

She looked exhausted, her face flushed red. Adora sighed. “Are you coming home any time soon?”

“Yeah, yeah.” She went back to work, distracted. “Sorry, I dunno what happened yesterday.”

“You made yourself sick working in the sun all day.”

“Sea Hawk overreacted.” Catra waved Adora off. “He’s just scared you’d kill him if you found he let me overwork myself.”

“Sooooo you’re admitting it?”

“No, that’s just his logic.”

Adora shook her head. “Come on, take the day off and come home. I wanna talk to you about something.”

“I really need to finish this.”

There was a weird moment where Adora thought she understood how Catra had felt for years. Catra had been working nonstop on Salineas for a month, and Adora was starting to feel a little ignored.

But she also understood Catra’s side. She took a deep breath, hauling herself up onto the roof and crawling over to Catra, gently putting her hand on Catra’s and stopping the hammer. “Hey. I get it, okay? But you’re not responsible for fixing all of Salineas.”

“Actually, I kind of am,” Catra replied bitterly. She was far too warm for it to be comfortable.

“I’m pretty sure Hordak could stand to take a little more responsibility than he has.” Adora couldn’t help but be a bit bitter about that. He had mostly stayed in Dryl, working with Entrapta on tech that would help with the rebuilding process. And that was great and all, but it wasn’t much compared to Catra being out here every day working herself half to death.

Catra let out a long sigh, finally relaxing her hand. “I just... need to do this, Adora. Okay?”

“I get that, but you don’t need to do it at the expense of your own health. And yes, I know I’m a hypocrite. But I’m worried about you.”

“I’m fine.”

“No, you’re not.” Adora squeezed her hand. “And that’s okay. Have you eaten anything?”

“No.” The honesty was nice.

“Did you skip eating because you felt sick?” Catra nodded. “Okay. So... you can leave with me, or Mermista can wash you out to sea so you don’t die in her kingdom.”

Catra looked around, and sighed, finally nodding. “Okay. Let’s go.”

Getting her back to solid ground was a bit dicey, but she held herself up and managed to walk back to the palace without much help.

“She lives,” Mermista said dryly when they arrived back at the palace. Glimmer smiled, although she couldn’t hide her worry.

“You okay?”

“Yeah, I’m fine, I’m fine.” Catra smothered a yawn, scrubbing her eyes.

“Picture of health all right,” Mermista deadpanned. “Look, you built like, an entire neighborhood on your own. Come back when you’re not burning up.”

Glimmer rested a hand on Catra’s shoulder, wincing when she felt the heat radiating off of her. Adora took a moment to whisper, “Thank you for taking care of her,” to Mermista. The princess shrugged.

“Yeah, you know. Whatever.”

Catra was not happy with the teleport back to Bright Moon. Glimmer put them close enough to the bed so she could drop straight onto it, groaning. Good luck, the queen mouthed before disappearing. Adora went to the bathroom, wet a washcloth with cold water, and returned to the bed, resting the cloth on the back of Catra’s neck. She shivered.

“Cold.”

“Yes, because you’re burning hot.” Adora settled in next to her. “So, I had an idea, and I already know you’re going to argue with it, but hear me out.” Catra hummed in affirmation. “I was thinking we should take some time off. You and me. I was thinking traveling, but now I’m thinking maybe go visit Frosta and spend a week in the snow.”

“Oh hell no,” Catra muttered. “I am not going anywhere with snow. That’s where I draw the line.”

“But you’re agreeing to the vacation?”

“I dunno.” Catra raised her head. “When? Can it wait until Salineas is-”

“No.” Adora gently clasped Catra’s face in her hands. “I know this is hard for you, but you can’t hurt yourself trying to fix things. That won’t accomplish anything, and nobody wants to see you hurting, not even Mermista.”

Catra looked ready to argue, but something in her expression flickered. “You’re willing to take time off just to do nothing?”

“Not nothing. To spend time with you. We can hold each other accountable. You keep me strapped down, and I’ll lie on top of you to make sure you don’t run off to Salineas.”

Tears slowly filled Catra’s eyes, and Adora panicked for a moment before Catra spoke. “You’d... really take time off to spend time with me?”

“Of course.” Adora kissed her gently. “I love you, Catra. And I know we’ve been through a lot and done a lot that doesn’t really... support that, and I want to prove it now. And I want to take care of you.”

The moment of silence between them was comfortable. The same silence they could have spent hours in at one point in their lives. “I love you too,” Catra finally murmured. “Maybe taking some off to spend together wouldn’t be so bad. If only to see you try and relax.”

“Ha. Ha.” Adora grabbed the washcloth and began gently wiping Catra’s face. “Glimmer gave us a month, but I’m pretty sure she’ll be happy if we want to take more. Let’s start with getting you better, then we can figure out what we want to do from there. Okay?”

“Yeah.” Catra snuggled into Adora’s chest, taking a deep breath. “That sounds good.”

It had worked. Adora couldn’t believe it. “So uh... I’m doing this relationship thing pretty good, huh?”

Catra snorted, reaching up to push her face away. “Get over yourself.”

#catradora #catradora fic #Mystery Person #Sam Answers #askbox fic

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monsterlibrarian · 2 years

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Title: Any Way the Wind Blows

Author: Rainbow Rowell

Genre: fantasy

Source: district library

Rating: ❤️ ❤️ ❤️ ❤️ ❤️

Comments: for as concerned as i was after reading the second book, this one made me feel like i swallowed the sun. i read the first half yesterday (or two days ago? 4am is funny like that) and it was so good i spent the rest of the evening just absolutely thrilled about everything. columbo appeared on tv when i wasn’t expecting and i gasped. i enjoyed my dinner enchiladas more than any meal in years. felt like i was a yellow balloon, or some sort of fizzy lemon drink. incomparable. the long wait in between books really heightened the relief of this one. it’ll be bad for my summer reading challenge since i won’t want to read anything else ‘til i’m done absorbing this one, though. i couldn’t stop reading the second half, just setting it down and picking it back up all day long. i went directly to sleep after finishing it so i could think about it all night, and even now when i woke up at 4am i reread the last part (after the sword and cake illustration) twice. maybe i’ll do a full series reread while i’ve still got this one checked out… but enough of that, i’ve gotta talk about actual literary stuff. plot and characters and all that. difficult without spoiling the biggest turns of the book, so excuse the vagueness. some REALLY great character growth for just about all the main characters. the ending was kind of abrupt and brought some new information for the characters to deal with (though the reader already knew at this point), and i feel like the impact of that specifically wasn’t fully shown, and combined with the open-ended narration from the last time we see the antagonist of this book, it made me feel like things weren’t fully resolved. rereading the end helped me find an interpretation on where simon stood with his wings that i liked, but not much else really settled. it almost feels like setting up for a sequel, but this is clearly labeled as a trilogy and i don’t think there’s enough that these characters could go through to further their growth to make another book about. they’re like 95% done, just give them two more minutes in the oven please. one more chapter to not end things quite so suddenly. the epilogue is solely an agatha point of view, so the last time we see the rest of the characters seems like it just cuts off. i get having an open ending and leaving things to the interpretation of the audience, and i value that especially as an alternative to a far-future epilogue, but there were just so many things i wanted more clearly explained. plot thread potential spoilers in order of importance to me: what about the other people claiming to be chosen ones? what happened with this antagonist, his narration implied there was more going on? what’s up with simon’s magic (the bubble pop especially)? what’s the plan with simon’s wings (<- made up my own answer to this one with the power of willful interpretation)? how do lady ruth (& jamie) fit into everything going forward? ok, the last one is more like it’s hard to imagine things in this new shape especially given that there’s not much to base it off of, but the rest are legitimate core plot involved questions that i think are kind of important to leave just hanging like that. speaking of, i’ve been writing this so backward i haven’t talked about the actual full plot yet. i think of it as sort of three tiers based on time spent and overall relevance to the central conflict: simon & baz relationship, chosen one/simon’s magic/simon’s other relationships, penelope/shepard/agatha plots. simon & baz is the only plot i think had actual full closure to the degree i’d stamp and file as done, but abrupt endings aside i think that all the plots were good arcs that furthered the story, gave space for character growth, and complemented the previous books. i found it a little cliche that everyone was shown paired with a potential romantic partner at the end, but that’s an opportunity the value of an open ending to shine. low stakes suggested futures. oops, tumblr has informed me i’ve rambled too much for one paragraph. i’ll try to wrap up in the next block.

i enjoyed the dynamic of the main antagonist with simon, and the way their conflict reflected some of simon’s self-doubt. i liked that agatha got her own plot instead of being dismissed as unnecessary after no longer being with simon. i think penny’s got some internal biases to work out about her overall treatment of normals, but her plot did a great job of taking her out of her comfort zone without sacrificing her competency. if you still can’t tell, i really enjoyed this book and the time i spent with it. since it’s the third of the trilogy, i can now recommend reading both this book individually and the rest of the series to accompany it. this hardcover is a 580-page beast two inches thick, but that just means there’s more to like. i really had a great time.

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messymessyml · 3 years

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Sometimes a premonition is destined to happen

Hi all,

This is the craziest thing I’ve written in a long while and the strangest part about it is that my top three oddest pieces of writing have all had a Greek Mythology worldbuild. It’s what the ancient Greeks would have wanted.

This is my Secret Santa 2020 gift for @bunathebunny and my prompts were ‘Percy Jackson AU’, ‘turning into cats’, ‘no soulmate AU’, ‘Jason x Luka’, and ‘Stephanie x Marinette’. There were a few other requested ‘fors’ and ‘against’s’ I was able to include here, but I have to say, this was the most reader-specific thing I think I’ve ever tailored. I hope you like it!

FYI: “~~” indicate POV changes, and while I ended up breaking this into chapters, this is essentially a oneshot. I curse when Jason is the narrator since I can’t see Jason as Jason without it so if that’s not your thing be forewarned. This is also cross posted on AO3.

@maribat-secret-santa-2020

Chapter 1

The camp was noisy, with people’s inner songs reaching out to the treeline in a mess of chaotic synergy. Word had arrived that Artemis and her hunters had just reached the outer edges of the barrier around the camp and the camp-goers who were not busy with sentry duties or away from camp were frantically working to put the finishing touches on the new lodgehouse erected for Artemis’s feast. Artemis was one of the more frequent godly visitors to Camp Half-Blood, but it was rare that she deigned to make the visit official, much preferring to conceal herself as another half-blood or a visiting instructor under a different guise. As son of Apollo, Luka was aware of a more mischievous side of his father’s twin sister, and the grating cacophony of sound combined with the foreboding feeling he felt down to his bones stemming from this impending visit was just on the edge of overwhelming for him.

Finding a quiet area was relatively easy, all told, though his senses tried to disagree with him as they quailed from the near sensory overload all he had to do was move to the outskirts of the lake as he followed a very familiar and well worn path. As Luka approached his boyfriend’s House, that marrow-ache he always felt from prophesy tightened in tandem with the relief that enveloped him as blessed silence cloaked him in it's comforting embrace. It seemed that the adventures of today wouldn’t be as easy to dodge as he’d hoped, but it was comforting to know that his boyfriend would be along with him for the ride.

Jason was having a no-good gods-be-damned day.

He’d been woken by Emma and Darcy who had managed to get into what appeared to be no holds barred fight to the death a four in the fucking morning. Emma, the eastern screech owl he’d found a few years before making his way to Camp Half-Blood, was hooting up a storm and fluffed to Elysium while Darcy, the mustard-bellied snake Luka had given him about a year and a half into their relationship lunged at Emma’s clawed legs with his teeth extended. Suffice to say, he wasn’t happy to wake up like that, and it served them both right that they were now separated on either ends of his lodge by a verifiable army of skeletal mice. It made a sort of macabre justice to see them cornered and policed by their own undead meals as he had left his lodge after breaking up the fight.

He was currently in the mess hall grabbing food, but it wasn’t much of an improvement over his living quarters. The raucous environment grated on his ears after a less than full night’s sleep and the fact that it was mostly the higher pitches of the girls making most of the noise didn’t help matters. The porridge he’d grabbed was looking less appetizing by the minute.

He’d just decided to give up on his breakfast when Jason heard a familiar voice call out “Hey bozo, whatcha up to this fine morning!” at the same moment another body hit his side. Jason faintly registered the girl who hit him let out an “oops'' as this action pushed his hand into his spoon and sent mush into his face. Miraculously, not a drop landed on the perpetrator, which gave Jason enough of a clue to know the identity of both the girl hanging from his shoulders as well as the girl still approaching from behind him.

“What. The. Fuck.”, Jason deadpanned. Taking a napkin from the center of the table, he did his best to wipe up the mess even with his tag-along making the stretch all that more difficult.

“Aww, don’t be like that, Jay. Marinette didn’t mean to do it, you know that.” Saying that, Stephanie slid on to the bench on his other side, leaving Marinette to cage him in from the right.

“Sorry, Jason. Next time I’ll check my landing!” Marinette added with a cheeky little grin.

The nerve. Jason couldn’t really say this minor level of chaos was out of the norm for his friends, but after his early wake-up call Marinette’s clumsiness wasn’t appreciated.

“Why the fuck are you two so energetic today? For that matter, why are all the girls acting like Eros came for a visit?” Jason asked.

Marinette piped up stating, “Artemis and her hunt are set to arrive today! Steph and I aren’t on sentry duty so we won’t get to join the welcoming party, but that just means everyone who isn’t on duty can join Artemis on her hunt later today!”

“I think she’s looking to recruit some new huntresses, and after her last visit to the Amazons, this is the next spot scheduled.” Stephanie confided. “Obviously everyone only means all the girls, so that’s why you’re hearing mostly girls talking about Artemis’s visit.”

“Knowing your luck, you’ll be offered a spot and rope Steph here into joining too.” Jason directed to Marinette with a raised eyebrow.

“I may have luck on my side, but I doubt Steph or I will actually join.” Marinette responded, continuing over his head with a smile, “I’m too happy with you to give all this up.”

Jason could see Steph smile from the corner of his eye as he wiped the last of the oatmeal from his face as she replied, “Babe you and me both.”

“Not that this isn’t exactly what I want to hear before eight in the fucking morning, but I need to get back to my cabin; I left Emma and Darcy in time-out and I need to re-up the power behind the undead mice keeping them away from each other.” Jason reluctantly got out.

“Ha, what the fuck? I thought those two got along, did they decide to wake you up, Mister Grumpypants?” Stephanie teased him even as Marinette relinquished her vice hold and scooted to the side to let him up.

“Sure as the Underworld, they decided 4AM was the best time for it. I swear, good ole pops must have remembered I existed for once and decided to have E and D play messenger or somethin’.” Jason grumbled as he got up and grabbed his tray.

“Don’t be a stranger! You won’t like the consequences, Jay!” Stephanie called out.

“Yeah-yeah-yeah, I got it. See you guys.” Jason said as he waved over his shoulder and dropped his bowl off at the clean up station on the way out.

Jason made his way back home, not in a hurry to arrive but not making any stops on the way. His father didn’t do him any favors in the PR department, and most camp-goers avoided him on principle. It wasn’t like there were many demigods with Hades as a father, and most avoided children of the Big Three out of practicality if not fear. Jason soon found himself entering his cabin, pleasantly surprised to see his boyfriend Luka calmly sitting waiting for him on the bed, gently strumming his guitar. Less pleasantly, it seemed his broken concentration at breakfast cost him a few skeleton mice enforcers whose bones were strewn across the floor and a clear path of destruction was shown leading from the corners each animal were previously penned into to the center of the room. He couldn’t see any blood and it looked like Luka had been able to calm them down as Emma and Darcy were now perched on his shoulder and leg, respectively, but it didn’t take a genius to see that they both weren’t done fighting.

“Hey love, I didn’t expect to see you until later today, what had you up so early?” Jason queried.

Giving one last strum to his instrument, Luka pulled a hand away to capture Emma in one hand, preventing her from diving down to the snake anklet just visible from under Luka’s pant leg. Darcy seemed content to stay where he was curled around Luka’s warmth. Sometimes it was eerie watching his boyfriend’s knack for precognition in action. Mostly, it got him hot.

“There were too many conflicting songs near Apollo’s cabin this morning so I woke up early. I came over here for some peace and to see you.” Luka calmly replied.

Nodding, Jason moved over to the washbasin, washing his face and hands, a simple “wait a sec” enough for the time being. He wanted to hug his boyfriend, gods dammit, but he didn’t want to do it with porridge on his body.

“Marinette struck again.” Jason complained, “She managed to land on me without me hearing her or her shadow reaching me first and got me covered in my breakfast. Not a drop landed on her, Luka! Luck shouldn’t be that powerful, babe.”

Luka’s eyes twinkled as he grinned and said, “What did you expect, mon beau, she is the daughter of Tyche.”

“The minute she and Steph got together it seemed they were a match made specifically to punish me. I swear, if Steph uses her powers on me one more time to rig another prank in her girlfriends favor, I will fill her bed with dancing bones.” he said as emphatically (read: dramatically) as he could.

“Sounds like a plan.” Luka full-out grinned, hardly able to get the words out. Once he’d gotten a bit of a handle on his response, Luka continued, “What do you say about joining me on our date a little early? Since we’re both up, let’s try to get to the river fort a little early; we might be able to watch the hunt from that vantage without incurring Artemis’s wrath.”

“Ugh, yeah, lemme just…” Jason said as he pulled power from the ground, focused on the mice bones scattered around his cabin. Commanding the dead to do his bidding wasn’t all that hard, but he wanted to make sure both Emma and Darcy stayed away from each other so he also instructed the shadows to form a barricade, making sure that the shadows understood that they needed to remain opaque and in between his companions while he was gone. That done, he turned to Luka and caught the tail end of his softened expression which never failed to soften his own brow in return.

“Ready, love?” Jason asked.

“With you? Always.” Luka replied.

Chapter 2

Jason found himself following after Luka as he moved through the forest like he belonged. Most of the time, he found himself bringing up the rear as it was easier for him to keep in contact with the shadows a step or two away from his child-of-the-sun boyfriend. Jason felt more secure being able to keep in touch with his shadows as they acted as an early warning system for any ambush. His time on the run while he made his way to Camp Half-Blood gave him a healthy dose of fear for the unknown and a respect for the utility of his powers to keep himself and others safe. With how distracted people had been that morning, there was no telling what might have slipped past the sentries divided attention.

Luka was up ahead, likely channeling the song of the forest as he usually did on these hiking dates of theirs. Today’s melody was a bit more playful, with individual notes that rang out loudly every few chords. With one last set of instructions to the shadows, Jason left them and pulled abreast of his boyfriend.

“Were you able to eat before you made your way to my cabin, Luka? I didn’t see you in the mess hall.” Jason began.

Still strumming, Luka responded, “No, I had a feeling that we should stay together today and try to get to the fort by the waterfall as quickly as possible. It feels like one of those omen-filled days.”

Small chills went down his spine as Jason digested that information. The fort was pretty far away from the residences and probably the furthest training ground in Camp Half-Blood. They would sometimes go to it on their days off since the location was hardly ever visited so he hadn’t thought much when the spot was originally proposed, but Luka’s intuition was never to be taken lightly. Even though they’d been walking for an hour or so, talking or enjoying each other’s presence, there was still a way to go to reach the fort. Time to get a move on, then.

“In that case, babe, let’s get moving.” saying that, he placed his hand on Luka’s hand holding the guitar, making eye contact, and after a gentle squeeze he let go.

Luka knew that the music would have helped, but he was weak. They’d been dating for over three years at this point and friends for almost five and he was still weak to those eyes. Sometimes Jason seemed to reach inside his chest and squeeze his heart to pulp, the only thing left the breath in his lungs calling him to sing. Sing his feelings and leave all else to the wayside.

It meant he wasn’t paying attention to where he was going.

It meant he didn’t feel fate grab hold.

Jason with laser focus on the path ahead and him with his head in the clouds, it meant they stumbled upon the hunt in progress without realizing it.

Chaos. Stephanie couldn’t have stopped the trainwreck that just happened to save her life. Unfortunately, her friend’s lives might be at stake at this point, so that just wasn’t gonna cut it. Time for damage control.

Stephanie and Marinette had joined the hunt after Artemis called for volunteers for the day stating that a training session was in order. They’d been tracking the golden buck that was the star of the hunt for almost two hours at this point and it was getting close to midday. The sun was shining almost directly down on the buck as it paused in a clearing where the animal trail intersected with one of the paths more commonly used by camp-goers. Stephanie and Marinette were shadowing Artemis while Artemis’s third-in-command waved three other girls to fan out to surround the clearing, both groups moving in tandem to corner the buck and lead him on a chase to the river. The purpose of the training exercise was to learn how to pursue large prey and tactically block all escape rather than a simple kill the buck, otherwise their team of demigods and goddesses would have finished the hunt over an hour ago.

Unfortunately, it seemed her dumbass friends didn’t get the memo and stumbled directly on the clearing, obscured from view until they were directly in the sunlight. As they came into view, the buck stiffened and the game was up; the buck’s nostrils flared and the animal ran in the exact opposite direction as intended, straight for Artemis.

Artemis swiftly shifted from the red-haired youth she had chosen for the hunt to a body with an Amazonian stature, her hair shifting to a sleek brown and her features shaping into an adult countenance. The buck, startled, reared up and attempted to hit the goddess, hooves aimed to cut and bruise. Artemis swiftly moved around the buck’s shoulder, pulled a knife from its sheath at the base of her spine and slit the buck's throat as it’s feet came down, spasming as it fell to the ground.

Sternly, moving to face her friends, Artemis’s booming voice could be heard: “What nonsense goes here? Who are you to dare ruin this hunt?”

Stephanie bit her tongue to avoid speaking on their behalf. Her own powers beat with Artemis’s thirst to mete out her comeuppance on the boys.

Her eyes cut from Artemis’s back to Jason’s as he straightened his spine and stepped further into the clearing to state: “Apologies, Artemis, we didn’t intend to interrupt your hunt. I was hiding myself and my partner in the shadows to avoid startling your prey, but it seems luck wasn’t on our side today.”

“Son of Hades…” Artemis said thoughtfully. “Your father has been kind to my children lately. I may be lenient on your punishment because of this. However,” here, Steph could see Artemis’s head tilt to fully view Luka, “Apollo has been quite impertinent lately. You, I do not feel so kind toward. You, I may turn into a boar for today’s hunt and I might not guarantee your safe return to humanity.”

The threat hung in the air. Stephanie so badly wanted to intervene. Perhaps...her eyes cut to Marinette’s and a moment passed between the two. Darting her gaze to Jason’s, she mouthed the word ‘luck’ and ‘Tyche’ to her girlfriend, hoping Marinette would be able to pick up her plan.

“Artemis,” Stephanie spoke. “Perhaps a middle-ground would be satisfactory. Marinette over there is the daughter of Tyche and I am the daughter of Nemesis; perhaps she could help you verify their claim about luck and I could propose a suitable punishment?”

Artemis half-turned around to view her as she contemplated the offer, her eyes piercing as their color shifted with her thoughts. Stephanie could feel her breath catch in her throat as she waited for Artemis’s response.

“Hmm, I suppose you all are still young, perhaps my usual punishments for men who interrupt a hunt can be bent.” Artemis’s gaze turned in Marinette’s direction. “What say you, daughter of Tyche? Are your powers strong enough to judge their statement true?”

Stephanie could see her girlfriend straighten her spine and tuck her chin determinedly before she replied, “Yes, I can do that.”

“And you will answer truthfully? You know I will know if you lie.” Artemis warned.

“Yes.” Marinette swore.

“Hmm. Very well, show me your skills.”

Marinette stepped forward, circling around the fallen buck and towards the boys. Jason was leaning just the slightest bit forward, while Luka seemed at ease. Stephanie’s eyes caught Luka’s and the amount of Zen in them was calming. Hopefully, he was calm because he had foreseen this gamble pay off. Stephanie could see Marinette’s hand raise to face their friends and a light pink glow started to emit from her hands, forming the Greek words for ‘ominous end’ over Jason’s head and ‘bright mayhem’ over Luka’s. Below, a timer formed, showing Luka’s current luck to have started at sunrise that morning, while Jason’s was marked in years, days, and hours. It wasn’t clear from what Stephanie could see whether Jason’s timer was moving backward or forward. It gave her chills either way.

Marinette’s voice rang out with her verdict: “Their luck was at fault today. It appears the Muses found these two to be fun to play with. Chance was at play.”

Shaking herself out of it, Stephanie stepped forward and pulled that sense of vengeance and judgement to the forefront of her mind as she spoke, “Since the hunt was not interrupted maliciously and was due to bad luck shared between the two, a shared punishment would be best. I propose the boy’s take the place of the buck in the hunt, but ask that they fall to no harm and their punishment ends at sundown. Do you agree this punishment is fitting, Artemis?”

A mirthful chuckle left the goddess’s lips while a yelp exited Jason’s. Stephanie kept her eyes on the goddess’s; the boys were on their own if Stephanie let on she wasn’t as impartial as she wished to appear to be to the goddess.

“If a time limit is what’s called for, daughter of Nemesis, then so be it.” Artemis said. “I agree to your proposed punishment and am willing to ensure no permanent harm befalls them so long as they stay within the boundaries of Camp Half-Blood, but if we only have until sundown, they’d better work hard to keep the hunt challenging. You two won’t be prey animals, oh no, let’s see what predator’s you’ll be.”

Artemis didn’t wait to hear from any of the campers present, including the boys, waving her hands in their direction even as Jason opened his mouth to argue. Jason’s comically open mouth shifted along with the rest of his body into the form of a mountain lion, leaving a large cat with a panting mouth in his place. Luka’s form shifted to that of a European lynx, even that unflappable friend of hers looking ungainly and awkward from the suddenness of the change.

Both boy’s clothes and bags had disappeared in the shift and Stephanie couldn’t help hoping that they’d return with the boy’s human forms when they were changed back at sundown. She shuddered at the thought of leading two whining toddlers back to camp in nothing but their birthday suits, and if Luka lost that guitar he wouldn’t be able to play for her anniversary dinner with Marinette. There’s no way she’d be able to propose to Marinette without Luka’s musical help. Stephanie sent a prayer for continued good luck towards her soon-to-be mother-in-law, stepping back as Artemis said, “Let the hunt recommence!”

Chapter 3

This was worse than any stint he’d pulled in the Underworld. He’d lost Luka a while back when another hunting party found them. Luka had bounded for the trees and he’d headed in the direction of the river. His powers weren’t working in this form and it bit him pretty deep as it felt like an entire sense of his was missing. Since he’d ‘woken’ back up from his near perma-death after his mom had died and learned to access his control over the shadows and bones around him, he’d come to rely on them pretty heavily without realizing it.

That was probably why he’d gotten Luka and himself into this mess in the first place; he didn’t realize that the clearing was entirely devoid of shadows and it was too close to midsummer for the clearing to allow him to hide in the shadows like he was used to. He’d managed to escape the hunting party on his tail but he was worried for his partner; moving in a new body and effectively becoming prey wasn’t exactly a walk in the park.

Luka could tell that this series of events was what his intuition was telling him would happen when he woke up this morning. All told, it wasn’t the worst thing he’d ever gotten himself into, and it was kinda cool to be able to leap from tree to tree and traverse the forest at this pace. It seems like most of the hunters had moved towards the river, as he hadn’t encountered any other hunters after losing his tail near the cliff face further inland. He was currently making his way towards the fort, figuring Jason would manage to follow the river to their intended destination without too much worry. For now, he’d enjoy this new body and feel the new rhythm he could feel through his paws and his nose while he waited for sundown.

Fuck.

Fuckity fuck fuck.

Claws were not for him. Whoever (read: himself and most definitely Steph) got him into this mess, they’d pay. That was the fourth hunting party he’d encountered and the second time he’d had to cross the river and backtrack to hide his tracks and he was sooo not down for the feel of wet fur. This just went to show how feathers and scales were so much better and why Emma and Darcy were the only pets for him; he could tell he wouldn’t want to pet an animal with fur for months after this.

Currently, he was hiding in a tree, taking a page out of his boyfriend’s book and hiding in the trees rather than at ground level. He could see Marinette and another girl from a different hunting party conversing about 10 yards away; there was no way he was getting down or giving away his position anywhere near where Artemis’s party could be found. That psycho goddess had it out for him, lenient his ass.

Marinette could tell Jason was hiding in that tree, the water puddle slowly forming underneath him was a dead giveaway. She loved the goofball too much to actually hunt him though which was about the only bit of luck he’d seen today (she could tell). Honestly, he’d have been caught at least seven times by now if she hadn’t miraculously shifted the tides of luck surrounding him or redirected other hunters like she was doing now. Mirabelle was a nice girl, but a little too vicious to let her in on the game she was playing, so she was focused on sending her off on a wild goose (or cat) chase as soon as possible.

“If we pincer attack, we can pin him down. “ a branch broke off from Jason’s direction and fell on the ground, causing Marinette to pause and do her best not to glare and give away the game. “...does that makes sense?”

“Yeah, I think the best bet would be for me to go down and try to pick up the trail, and run him back to you. Sounds good?” Mirabelle said.

“Yep, let’s do this!” Marinette sweetly smiled in reply.

Mirabelle nodded, turned, and Marinette watched her go, waiting until she was out of earshot to say, “You are the absolute worst human-in-cat-form I have ever seen.”

Marinette marched over to Jason, seeing him freeze and look her dead in the eye. It wasn’t exactly easy to tell what Jason wanted to say, but she could fill in the gaps for him.

“You, monsieur, are going to give yourself away at this rate. I’d like to keep you in one piece if it’s all the same to you, so here’s what you’re going to do: head inland and away from the river. We were driving our prey towards the river to trap it, so any hunting party worth their salt will be crawling along the riverbed. You are going to head to the fort upstream and hide; not many other camp-goers go there as frequently as you and Luka do and it’s your best chance to stay out of Artemis’s sight. Stephanie and I will continue to run interference, but you are acting like a teenager going through a growth spurt with how clumsy you’ve been, and that’s saying something coming from me!”

The big cat scoffed at her, but leapt to the next tree, struggling a bit to land gracefully but not with too much trouble and continued on like that further inland as directed. Marinette didn’t watch for too long; she had a job to do.

Luka ends up outpacing most of the hunters he’s encountered, but one is hot on his tail, following him at forest level as he makes his way through rocky outcrops to the fort. He’s not sure if it’s an official member of the hunt or another camp-goer, but he tries his best to wind his way around boulders and choose outcroppings that blend in with his fur color to avoid his pursuer.

Taking a small break, he waits in the shadow of an outcropping, watching. His pursuer is good; that he can tell, and he doesn’t want to lead them directly into the fort and make it even hard on him and Jason to get through this debacle. It seems, it’s time to call for help.

“Apollo, hear me please. Your companions the Muses have struck a game between Artemis and I, and I need your help. Grant me aid avoiding my pursuer.”

“Luka, son of mine.” Apollo’s amused tone filtered through his mind. “You’ve gotten yourself trapped by one of Artemis’s hunter’s I see. Very well, I will help you this once, but I will be joining as a spectator for this one. Artemis’s main trouble is with me, after all, and I’d like to see her face when she realizes you’re under my direct protection.”

Soon after, a flash of light appeared, blinding his pursuer, and Luka moved onward while she was distracted.

It was close to sundown, and Jason was finally in reach of the fort by the waterfall. After his encounter with Marinette, he’d seen evidence that Stephanie was also redirecting heat away from his passage through the forest, but it was still slow going. His bulk had almost ratted him out more than a few times, and he’d taken to any groundcover he could when possible as it was almost impossible for him to figure out how to move through the trees without sound. He was stealthy enough on two legs to give assassins a run for their money, but put him on four legs and he was worse than a toddler was at stealth. He hadn’t seen Artemis since the beginning, but knowing his normally catastrophic luck, that was only due to Marinette’s aid.

Crawling forward, he inched his way around the watering hole below the waterfall in the direction of the fort, when suddenly an arrow passed in front of his paw and hit the stump he was crouched by….Clearly, Marinette’s blessing was wearing thin. Taking his chances, Jason bolted.

Arrows pelted behind him, and the aim they held was mocking in its accuracy. Just close enough to scare but not close enough to injure. The direction they came from was just as confusing as they seemed to originate from the water.

Diving behind another tree, this time close enough to the fort to see his boyfriend peering from the battlements, he peered out in the direction of the water to see none other than Artemis hovering in place, this time in a blended form that combined the youthfulness and agelessness of the two forms he encountered her in earlier. She was also holding a really fucking scary recurve bow, so there’s that.

“Come out and play, kitties. You know you know a good hunt is part of your deal with me.” Artemis crooned.

Jason wasn’t fucking moving, dying was not part of the deal. Unfortunately, it seems his slow arrival also allowed Artemis to set up an ambush as two women lept at him from the shadows (the traitors, he was going to train so much to overcome this dependency he’s built on them), forcing him to emerge. Jason kept his eyes pinned to Artemis, even as he heard others leave their hiding places to encircle the clearing at the base of the waterfall.

He was trapped.

Luka watched as his boyfriend was driven into the open. He was also being ushered out of the protection of the fort and into the open himself.

“Now would be a good time, dad.” he whispered his prayer.

Marinette was about to lose the game she’d decided to play, and she was NOT happy. Nothing she could really do about it; she could see that the balance of luck and fortune were too stable to shift.

She was so focused on trying to parse the threads of fate that she almost missed the flash of light that signaled Apollo’s arrival. Marinette did see Artemis whirling around to glare at the newcomer, though, a bright man in a Hawaiian shirt and chacos. Apparently, being a deity did not automatically give you god-tier fashion sense.

“Artemis, dearest, what’s this I hear about a grudge against my son and his partner? I thought you left the animal transformations back in the Hellenistic period.” Apollo drawled.

“You! I can’t believe you have the audacity to show up now of all times! Where have you been?” Artemis yelled.

“Sometimes a god has to go on vacation too; you — of all of us — leave Olympus the most, dearest, so I assumed you’d understand.”

“Sometimes?! Sometimes doesn’t happen midway through a war council when you’ve promised to share a prophecy pertinent to the fight at hand! Ares about had my head about wasting the council’s time on petty matters because you flaked out to — where, Tahiti???”

“What can I say? Sometimes the sun in this hemisphere just isn’t it. I’ve got to share the light with everyone.”

“Apollo, you — !” screeching, Artemis brought her bow to bear on Apollo, shooting faster than even the demi-gods present could see.

Apollo was shifting around, using the last rays of the day’s light to bend away from her arrows, periodically reminding her “This is Camp Half-Blood, dearest.” and “You don’t want to hit one of your precious hunters, do you?”

Giving one last yell of frustration, Artemis released her quiver and lowered her bow and arrow, pinched her brow and said through gritted teeth, “Apollo, you insufferable child. You. Are. Coming. To. Olympus. With. Me.”

With a brief glance at the sky and a one-handed vice grip on Apollos bicep, Artemis stated, “A fine hunt, your debt is repaid.” Then she waived her hand towards the big cats seemingly frozen in place and teleported away.

Stephanie was closest to Jason and saw as his form crumpled to the ground, shifting back into human form. Stephanie ran to help him up even with the shadows swarming around him as his powers returned in a sudden influx. She grabbed him and hoisted him up onto his feet, keeping her hands firm and grounding while he readjusted to his normal form again.

Stephanie just thanked the gods that her friends weren’t naked after returning to normal.

“You two need to stop getting into so much trouble; you’re lucky Marinette and I were there to help.” Stephanie commented, finally releasing her hold on Jason to let him stand under his own power.

“Yeah, fuck you too.” Jason growled out.

Luka picked himself off the ground, checking his guitar for any damage. He saw Marinette approach from the corner of his eye with her palm facing him, granting him good fortune, so he wasn’t too surprised that he couldn’t find any damage to his instrument on close inspection.

Luka glanced up at her and said, “Thank you, Melody. This day would have turned out much worse without your help.”

Marinette just smiled softly at him in return. “Let’s go home.”

#Jason Todd x Luka Couffaine #Stephanie Brown x Marinette Dupain-Cheng #maribat #maribat-secret-santa-2020 #gift fic #secret santa #fanfic #ML x DC #percy jackson crossover #mlb x dc

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stumped-on-bennington · 5 years

Text

The Star and the Moon

pairing: Brian x reader(they/them)

Summery: Queen is on location writing for their next album ‘A Night at the Opera’ when some mysterious things start happening.

word count: 3,137

warnings: light swearing

A/N: this is more of an experimental type of thing, I don’t really know what I’m doing. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

It had only been about 3 days since the band had arrived in the middle of nowhere to record their next album “A Night at the Opera”. It was late in the night, or rather early in the morning, when John had gone running through the small house him and the rest of the band had been sharing. Running into 3 separate rooms he spouted just about the same thing with only minor differences: “You have to wake up! I discovered something and everyone has to come see it!” Nearly 20 minutes later all 4 men were standing in the very small downstairs bedroom that John had taken up.

“Right, what is it, why are we awake before the sun is even up, John?” Roger said, eyes heavy and voice full of anger.

“So, ugh..” John had started, but stopped.

“What?” Roger spat. John only stood there, regretting that he hadn’t waited till morning when everyone had woken up.

“Just tell us, John.” Brian said, also very tired and annoyed but more patient than Roger.

“Well, I kind of discovered something and I wanted to make sure I wasn’t going crazy.” John said sheepishly. He then proceeded to take out one of the notebooks he had been using to write songs. Each page had the familiar handwriting that they could easily pick out as John’s, but in the margins there was another handwriting. While John’s was slightly messy and more casual, the second person’s writing was more elegant, for lack of better words; It flowed beautify. While Freddie, Brian, and Roger looked at the pages full of the mystery writers criticisms of Johns songs, John stood across from them, looking at the 3 men nervously.

“You woke us up for this?” Freddie said, looking up from the notebook.

“What do you mean ‘for this’?” John said, visibly shaken up, “This writing came out of nowhere and I'm pretty sure it's none of yours. Honestly I'm a little freaked out about this.”

“Darling, I'm sure it’s one of ours, you obviously have just been up for too long. Go to sleep and we all can worry about this later today, OK?”

“Oh… ok. You’re probably right, I'm just a little delirious. I’m sorry guys, I just wasn’t thinking properly, I-I just-”

“Dear, it's alright. We’re going to bed now, you should too.”

“Alright” John said as the rest of his band filed out of his small room. Freddie had to be right. It wasn’t unusual for him to have one of his band mates go over his songs and write suggestions for him. But he just couldn’t shake the feeling that something was off. He wanted to solve the mystery of who had been writing in his notebook. It was cursive, so it couldn’t have been his or Roger’s. It also wasn’t as large as Freddie’s nor as small as Brian’s, it was somewhere in the middle; perfect. As much as he wanted to stay up to try and figure this whole thing out, he had nearly been awake for 20 hours and he couldn’t deny his body the restful call to sleep any longer. Regretfully so, John fell asleep, leaving the mystery to be solved the next morning.

The next morning everyone but John had practically forgotten about the small meeting they had last night. The only thing they could recall was being woken up by john for about half an hour at 4AM. John was still asleep when Brian was sitting at the breakfast bar, working on one of his songs. About midway though he decided to walk only about 3 feet away to poor himself more coffee, taking him only a few seconds to do so. When he had turned back to his sheet of paper he noticed a small note to the side of what he had written. He had no idea where it had come from as it wasn’t his writing. The small message was a tip about a line he had written and how the mystery writer though it should be changed. Brian was a little taken aback. No one had been in the kitchen and there was no way someone could have read what he had written and made notes in the time it took him to poor his coffee.

As confused as he was, Brian followed the notes advice, switching the line, and finished writing the song. After reading it over he felt that the changed line made the song a lot better. Just as Brian had finished up, Roger came stomping into the kitchen.

“Alright, real funny, Bri. Why have you been going through my songs?” Roger said, waving a piece of paper in front of Brian’s face. Brian took the paper and saw the same mysterious writing on Roger’s song that had appeared on his own.

“This isn’t from me.” Brian said, handing back the paper to Roger.

“Oh yeah, then who else would have written such a snarky comment on my work, huh?”

“What is with all the yelling?” Freddie said, joining the other two.

“Brian is criticizing my work and he won’t say it to my face, and on top of that he won’t admit that he did it!” Roger was practically yelling at this point.

“Let me see.” Freddie said, reading over the song and than over the comment at the bottom. The note said ‘it’s a bit shit, and also kinda weird.’ Freddie couldn’t help but let out a laugh, “Well, whoever wrote this isn’t wrong.”

“Give me that.” Roger said, snatching back his song, “ I want to know who wrote this!” Just as Roger had said that, John walked in holding several of his notebooks, “Oh good, you’re all here, perfect.” John set down his note books and opened each one to different pages, each one had the mystery writing. “So I thought it over and compared it to each of your handwriting and it just can’t be any of yours nor can it be mine.”

“Do you think it could be someone working here? The owner or someone?” Roger suggested.

“I don’t think so, notes appeared on my song in a matter of seconds and there was no one around to do it. Even if there was someone in here, they would have had to been reading over my shoulder the whole time in order to write such constructive notes.” Brian then proceeded to show his song to the rest of his band.

For the next hour or so the 4 men gathered all the song they had written while at the farm. On every single page there was the mysterious handwriting. Each note was rather helpful and constructive, apart from some that just flat out called some of their songs shit. The band was stumped.

“I have an idea.” Brian said, standing up from his seat. The 3 other men watched him as he grabbed a new piece of paper and proceeded to write on it. “I was think that since all the notes have been helpful and otherwise truthful, we could write down asking it a question, and if were lucky whoever, or whatever, is leaving these will respond.”

Brian set the piece of paper down on the counter. In Brian’s handwriting it said ‘Who is leaving these notes?’ Brian then proceeded to turn around, facing the opposite way. Freddie, Roger, and John followed suit, turning around. The 4 men stood there for almost a minute. They wanted to turn around and find the writing answering the question, but at the same time they wanted to turn around and find nothing. They also didn’t want to turn around at all, just to leave the paper, leave the farm, and never have to worry about about any of this ever again.

Letting out a sigh, Roger was the first to turn around. All he did was let out a slight laugh. The 3 other men turned to see what it was.

Roger grabbed the paper and showed to the other “There’s nothing here.” Roger just laughed. “We must look like bloody lunatics, trying to get a response from literally nothing.” Eventually the other men joined in, laughing and feeling slightly relieved that nothing had happened. They were just about to go back to writing music when they heard a jar fall over where just had just been standing. They didn’t really think anything of it, they had just been standing there, so one of them must had nudged it. Roger went to set it back up right when he looked at the paper once more.

All the color had faded from Roger’s face as he help the paper in his shaky hand. Slowly turning back around he use all the strength he had to croak out the tiniest of words “..Guys..?” The 3 men turned around to see what it was, looking over Roger’s shoulder to look at the paper. Right below Brian’s handwriting was a regretfully familiar cursive. It read ‘I am. My name’s Y/N.’ The 4 men felt dizzy. They didn’t know what to make of this. While Freddie, John, and Roger stood in silence, Brian quickly regained his wits and sat back down at the table, scribbling down another question.

‘How are you doing this?’

Before Brian could even set down his pen, a response was already being bleed onto the page. All Brian could do was stare on, mesmerized.

‘I don’t really know. Whenever I tried to interact with you or others before they never seemed to notice me, so I figured my writing would go unnoticed as well, but for some reason everyone can see what I write.’

While Brian was continuing his strange conversation, Freddie said aloud “Dear lord, Brian is talk to a demon.” but it was if no one was listening to him, everyone now in their own little world with thousands of thoughts and questions running through their minds.

Brian pressed on with this new found entity.

‘What are you exactly? A demon? A ghost?’

‘I don’t know. I don’t have any memories of having a life or dying, and I don’t have an urge to do harm. I just kind of awoke one day, here. I watched people and animals come and go, building erected, changed. I don’t know who or what I am, the only thing I knew from the moment I awoke was my name. Y/N.’

Brian was a little confused by this. He didn’t know what to do next. He wanted to ask more questions, but he didn't know what to ask. He didn't feel scared or frightened, he didn't know what he was feeling.

While Brian was trying to think of what to do next Roger quickly grabbed the paper and pen , reading over the small conversation and than scribbling down his own question.

‘If you’re not a demon, then why did you say those things about my song, its great’

‘Well, it is kind of strange, isn’t it? Why would you say such sexual things about an inanimate object?’

By this point Roger was so upset that he just dropped his pen and stormed out of the kitchen. Freddie was a still a little shocked, but was not about to start writing to some unknown entity, so he followed Roger to make sure he didn't completely destroy the farm.

John slowly walk over to Brian.

“So..?” John asked.

“So what?” , Brian looked over to the shorter man.

“So, what do we do about this.. Thing? How do we get rid of it?”

“Get rid of it? Thing? John, this isn't some object or force, it's a person, I can feel it. And furthermore why would we get rid of them? They've done nothing wrong, in fact they have been nothing but helpful!”

“Christ, Brian. Sorry, I didn't mean any offense, I just thought that-”

“Brian! John! Come quickly, Roger has locked himself in the cupboard and wont come out until we all say his song is good.” Freddie had said quickly before running back to where Roger had locked himself up.

“Come on Roger, enough of this!” Brian said towards the large cupboard near the recording room.

“No! Not until everyone apologizes for saying my song was bad!” Roger yelled from inside, slightly muffled by the large wooden doors.

“What kind of cupboard has a lock on the inside?” John asked, ready to just walk away.

“Come on, lets just apologize and get back to work, OK?” Freddie said, motioning for the 3 of them to all say sorry at the same time.

The 3 men, in unison, said “sorry”. They expected Roger to almost instantly unlock the cupboard and step out, but instead he shouted from inside once more.

“I want them to say it too” Roger shouted.

Everyone stood in silence for a second. They all knew what Roger meant, but were apprehensive at first to do anything. Just as Brian was going to reach for some paper a nearby radio switched on, filling the room with a loud screeching sound before settling down to a low static hum. Then a small, soft voice echoed from the radio.

“I’m sorry.”

Roger unlocked the cupboard, slowly stepping out. “W-what?” he said.

“I’m sorry; for saying your song was bad.” the voice said again.

“Y/N, is that you?” Brian asked

“Yes, I'm glad this worked. I was worried that the radio would burst into flames or explode.” said Y/N, a low hum hanging over their voice.

The 4 men spent hours talking to this mysterious invisible person. Freddie warmed up to them, as if hearing their voice helped him to trust that they weren’t going to do any harm to him or his friends.

Long after the sun had set Brian was the only one left by the radio. The 3 other men had one by one gone to bed, leaving Brian and Y/N by themselves.

“Brian, do you like stars?” Y/N asked.

“I do actually. Before I was in this band I went to school for astrophysics, I even taught at a school for a while. I really like space and learning about all the advancements in technology that are being made that are expanding our knowledge of our universe.” Brian had lit up upon discussing this topic with his new friend. He talked on and on about space and how he wanted to go back one day to finish his PhD.

“Sorry, I’ve been talking from a while and didn't even give you a chance to talk.” Brian said, realizing he had been talking for quite some time.

“It’s alright, I like hearing you talk about something you’re so very passionate about.” Y/N said.

A pink hue spreed upon Brian’s face, quickly he changed the subject. “What about you, Y/N? Do you like the stars? Have any favorite ones?”

“My favorite star is Polaris, the north star. But out of all the things that can be seen in the night sky, my favorite is the moon. No matter what phase it is in, no matter whether it is visible or not, it is always there.”

Brian felt a special connection to Y/N. something he had never felt with any other person before in his life.

Everyday Brian would talk to Y/N, the rest of the band would as well, but it seemed no matter where he was, Brian had a radio by his side. He would play songs to Y/N before anyone else. They were always the first and last person Brian would talk to every day. Brian had grown so attached that he feared the day he would have to leave. Brian tried to push back his fears, but before he knew it, the day had come that he and the rest of his band had to pack their bags and go back to their homes, presenting the album to their producer.

With all the bands bags packed in the car that was waiting to take them back, Brian was standing a with a small handheld radio in his hands a few feet away.

“Y/N, do you think you could come with us? Come tour the world with us and help us write more music?” Brian asked the small radio, since he could not see Y/N he had grown accustomed to talking to the radio, as if Y/N was trapped inside it.

“I don't know, Brian. I would love to go with you, but I don't know if I can leave. I've never tried to leave before, but I don't know what would happen if I did.” They could not be seen, but from the sound in their voice it was eminent that Y/N had tears in their eyes.

“If-” Brian paused for a second, fighting back his own tears, “if I never hear you again, promise me that you'll never forget me.” Brian looked up from the radio, look forward, as if he could tell Y/N was standing there right in front of him.

“I promise.”

It was almost if Brian could actually hear them, not from the radio, but from the surrounding area.

“Come on, Bri! We have to get going now!” Rodger called after Brian.

Before leaving, Brian quickly placed one of his guitar picks on the ground and stood back up.

“Good bye, Y/N. I'll never forget you.” Before Y/N could respond, Brian shut off the radio and made his way to the car. Shortly after the car sped away with the band and Brian inside.

Several months had gone by, none of the men had forgotten the mysterious Y/N. It was late and the men had just finished one of their shows. Trying to cool down away from all the cheering fans and the press, Brian made his way onto the roof of the venue. There he saw a figure of someone he felt that he knew. Their white clothes appearing to glow in the moonlight. Slowly making his way over, he stood next to them.

“I Believe this belongs to you.” they said, holding out their hand, in the center of their palm was Brian’s guitar pick, the one he left that day on the farm months ago.

Brian smiled. “You can keep it, as long as you promise never to leave my side.”

“Deal” Y/N said, wrapping their arms around Brian’s neck, while he wrapped his arms around their waist.

From that day on, Brian was always the brightest person in the room to Y/N. And every once in a while Y/N would be gone for some time, only to reappear a short while later, but no matter whether they could be seen or not, everyone knew they were always there by Brian’s side.

#Brian May #Brian May x reader #they/them #they/them reader #Queen #queen fanfiction #Brian may imagine #Bohemian Rhapsody #bohrhap #Gwilym Lee #John Deacon #Joe mazzello #Roger Taylor #Ben Hardy #Freddie Mercury #Rami Malek #70s Brian May

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motherbearof03 · 5 years

Note

Writing Prompt. Pansy x Neville #14. It’s 4am # 17 And now you’re naked. Okay. # 29 If you think you’re getting out of this easily, you’re sadly mistaken. Please and thank you. 😊

So you may have been looking for smut, but my muse won’t allow me to put Pansy with anyone but Harry anymore. However, I think you’ll like this. It made me laugh the whole time I was writing it! As soon as I can think up a title, I’ll post it on AO3. Thank you for the prompt! This was great fun. Who’s next?

*********

The conch shell charmed to let her know if students were in the hallway woke Pansy before she heard the knock on the door. Tightening the belt of her dressing gown, she opened it to see two small First Years standing there, eyes wide.

“P-professor Parkinson, there’s a man on the grounds outside our rooms,” said the one.

“And he’s starkers,” added the other. She whispered the last word like it was a swear and the first nodded in agreement.

“Ladies, have you been watching Netflix again?” asked Pansy, biting her lip to keep from smiling at the child.

Hogwarts had changed a lot since she was a student and Muggle internet was now available in the common rooms and the online entertainment network was available to the students; with logins and passwords appropriate to their ages to restrict the younger ones from accessing more adult programming. But brilliant witches and wizards that they were, most of them figured out a way around the restrictions.

“No! Well, yes, but we’re not making this up!” The first speaker said. “Come look!”

Suppressing a sigh and refraining from asking the girls why they were awake at such an hour to begin with, but wondering not for the first time what possessed her to agree to fill in for Hannah Abbott, now Longbottom, while she took a short maternity leave, Pansy again tightened the knot on her dressing gown. Silken fabrics were aesthetically pleasing but not very practical.

As she followed the girls down the hallway, she muttered to herself,

“Filling in for the school nurse isn’t hard, Hannah said.”

“I’ll stay home with the kids, Harry said.”

“It will be fun to be back at school as an adult, Hermione said.”

Hannah was right. So far all she’d had to deal with was scrapes and bruises, stomach aches, sore throats, headaches and menstrual cramps. Those were all things she could handle. There had been one arm broken in two places from a particularly rough Quidditch game, but Hannah was still in the castle in her and Neville’s rooms so she was able to come and cast the healing spell while Pansy got to hold the baby. But all that did was make her miss her son and daughter. And yes, it was fun to be there as an adult and relive the good memories, but no one had warned her how needy and prone to exaggeration First Years could be. She snorted silently. A naked man outside their window indeed!

“Flibbertygibbet,” she said and the portrait swung open to enter one of the First and Second Year Girls’ Common Room.

Students were still sorted into Houses for points and Quidditch teams but dorms had been rearranged by ages, mixing the four houses, with a prefect and professor assigned to each group. Headmistress McGonagall had found the co-mingling of houses had resulted in less unfriendly competition and bullying. The two girls led the way to the window that looked out over the grounds with the greenhouses in the distance. Sure enough, she could see a male figure, walking slowly toward the castle. It was still too dark to discern his face but Pansy knew it had to be a professor or an older student. The wards were too strong to allow anyone else onto the grounds without permission. But as the clouds moved in the sky to reveal the nearly full moon, light shone down on him and she gasped. More from recognition of the person than to his state of undress although that did puzzle her as well.

“See,” said the one girl. “Starkers.”

Again, the word was whispered.

“Girls, you stay here,” Pansy ordered, and apparated from where she stood to the other side of the castle wall, walking briskly toward the man; who continued his slow progress. Now she could see he was limping a little. Having heard the crack of her apparition, he raised his head and drew to a halt, seeing her approach.

“Neville,” she hissed, although there was no one around to hear her if she had shouted. “What are you doing?”

“Pansy.” He had the grace too look embarrassed.

She tightened her dressing gown belt again, thinking she was transfiguring it into something more practical as soon as whatever this was was over and planted her hands on her hips in her best Molly Weasley imitation.

“It’s 4 a.m. And you’re naked!”

“Yeah, erm, we were up with the baby and when she finally went to sleep I couldn’t so I decided to go down to the greenhouses, but then I must fallen asleep while I was mixing fertilizer and it –”

“Exploded!” Pansy finished his sentence as she got a good look at his skin. His eyebrows were singed and there were burns on his face, hands and forearms. She assumed his robes had caught fire and that’s why he was undressed.

“I thought I could get back in the castle without anyone seeing me,” he told her.

As she looked him over for additional wounds, she realized quiet Professor Longbottom was a right fine specimen. The muscles on his chest and abs were ever more defined than Harry’s, she thought, and being an Auror he kept quite fit. She wondered if he’d been hiding this behind his robes all those years at school as well.

“Right then, let’s get you up to the infirmary and treat those burns. But first –” she transfigured the handkerchief in her pocket to a towel for him to wrap around his waist.

As they fell in step beside each other walking back to the castle, Pansy looked at him from corner of her eye and said with a smirk,

“But if you think you’re getting out this easily, you’re sadly mistaken. Two First Years saw you and by breakfast it will be all over the castle.”

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welovekpopscenarios · 6 years

Text

Encounter (Daehyun x Reader)

Admin: Candi Request/Idea: How can Daehyun resist going back to the woods after encountering the most beautiful thing he has ever seen? Fandom: B.A.P Member/reader: Daehyun x Reader Genre: Angst, Horror, Smut Warnings: Gore Words: 2k Authors note: I finally did it, please go easy on me since I am a bit rusty but I still hope you enjoy it! I decided to write for B.A.P finally.

When Daehyun first stepped foot into the forest he didn’t know what powers it held, he didn’t know that he’ll be drawn to it like a moth to a flame and he would have no clue as to why he wanted to go in deeper into it. The first time he visited the forest was with his friends, Yongguk had the great idea of letting loose and having a few drinks in the forest with a fire. Everyone seemed to be into the idea, so they drove deep into it where no one could find them, there was no phone service, they completely disappeared.

“What if we get attacked?” Jongup played with his fingers and looked down.

“By who?” Daehyun scoffed.

“Or by what?” Youngjae added, trying to scare Jongup.

Yongguk laughed and reassured Jongup that they’ll be fine. As time went on and the drinks were starting to take away every bit of sensibility that the boys have left they decided to call it a night. Camping wasn’t on the agenda, but everyone was quite intoxicated, so they slept in the truck. As they got in, Daehyun couldn’t shake the feeling of someone staring at him, he kept looking around but eventually he blamed it on the alcohol. He got into the truck and got the window seat, he rested his head on the window and admired the shadows that the moon painted on the soil. His eyes shifted and caught a glimpse of something between the trees.

“Guys! Look there, between the trees!” He screamed out and pointed.

“What?” Himchan scrunched his eyebrows. “You’re just drunk, you’re fine.”

Daehyun could have sworn he saw something, it appeared to be a human figure. His mind was racing with questions, but he calmed himself down and ended up convincing himself it was just his imagination. Throughout the night Daehyun kept waking up, he felt like he was being watched but he promised himself he won’t freak out. He got out of the car quietly, looked at his phone, still no service.

“It’s only 4am, I just want to go home.” He whispered to himself. He took a short stroll around the woods, not straying too far from the car. He looked up and could see the sky full of stars and the moon shining through the branches of the old trees. He was breathing in the fresh air, the smell of the fire still lingered in the air.

“Hello?” Daehyun left his trance as he heard a branch break on the floor, as if someone stepped on it. “Probably some animal.” He breathed out and turned back around. He froze, he could clearly see a human standing right between the trees. The person got closer to him until he could make out that it was indeed a woman. She was wearing fur that covered her most intimate areas and had strange marks on her face but she was the most beautiful thing he has ever seen. Daehyun still couldn’t move, it was like someone cast a spell on him, he was in a state of complete paralysis. She got close and caressed his face, his heart was racing, he wanted to scream and run but it was no use. Her mouth opened wide, tearing the sides of it to the point of blood gushing out, her teeth were sharp and stained with blood.

“Daehyun! Daehyun!” Yongguk shouts out. Daehyun wakes up, sweating and panting. “What the fuck happened? What did you dream about?” “What?” Daehyun wiped his forehead, sweat dripping down his cheek. “I-I swear it was not…” The dream felt so real he didn’t know whether it happened or not but after thinking about what happened he presumed it was only a nightmare.

“Are we ready to go home?” Yongguk asks and everyone hums in agreement.

On the way home, Daehyun was pretty quiet, he couldn’t wrap his mind around the fact that it was only a dream yet it all felt so real. The group stopped to grab some food but Daehyun couldn’t stomach anything at that moment, his mind was invaded with thoughts of the witch from the forest.

They arrived back home by afternoon, everyone dropped their bags and found the nearest spot to rest and all sighed out in unison, the lack of sleep was getting to them and they were all hungover on top of that.

“I’m gonna go for a nap, don’t know about you guys.” Zelo announced. Everyone seemed to scatter off but Daehyun, he stayed on the couch and fell asleep there.

He was walking through the forest, searching for the beautiful witch he encountered last night. The air was so fresh, wind so warm and trees so vibrantly green.

“Yo wake up it’s 9am we have practice.” Yongguk wakes up Daehyun.

“I slept here all night?”

“Looks like it. Come on, the management is going to kill us if we’re not there practicing.”

They hurried down and spent most of the day practicing for their upcoming concert.

“Man what’s wrong with you?” Himchan sits down next to Daehyun and asks. Daehyun has been pretty distracted all day, he wasn’t managing to follow the new routine like he always did.

“I just, I can’t stop thinking about my dream. It felt so real, I’m almost sure it was real.” Daehyun answered to Himchan and unfortunately Himchan didn’t know how to help him.

After about a week Daehyun was slowly starting to go insane, all he could think of was the being he saw in the forest. He sat down on the couch and searched for his phone in his pocket, he felt something and took it out, it looked like pieces of wood with weird markings on them. Those were the same jeans he wore during the camping trip. He needed to go back and prove to himself that what he saw wasn’t real but how was he going to explain it to the guys? “I’m going to the woods by myself to prove that the witch I saw wasn’t real!” That’s insane. He needed a plan and needed to come up with it fast before he went insane.

“Hey guys so I was thinking, the camping trip was really fun right?” He starts.

“Right.” The group responds.

“Why don’t we go again this weekend? The weather is meant to be really nice and we need to relax before our show.” He stands there for a minute before the group all agree and decide that it’s a good idea.

Finally, the weekend is here after what it felt like forever. Daehyun wakes everyone up and hurries them to get to the car. They took off quite early in the morning, he’d have plenty of time to explore the woods and look for the breathtaking woman he knew he saw. Once they got there he dropped all of his stuff and legged it into the woods while he told the others he’s gone exploring. Hours went by and he found nothing, he finally gave up and started heading back to their site. When he finally came back everyone was relieved to see he was safe, he was gone for hours and they started to get worried about him. Daehyun sat down looking disappointed as ever and accepted the fact that everything was just a dream. For the rest of the night they all sat around the fire, sipping beer and singing songs, eventually everyone fell asleep.

Daehyun woke up and looked around, everyone was still asleep, he checked his phone and it said it was 4am. He went to the car to get some water.

“Guys?” He heard the rustling of leaves behind him. “Is anyone there?”

“You came back.” A soft voice spoke to him, he instantly froze and told himself it was just a dream. He felt a hand on his back, it travelled to his chest and turned him around.

“I’m Y/N. I haven’t stopped thinking about you ever since you came into the forest the first time.”

“Who are you?”

“Do you not remember me?”

Of course, Daehyun remembered you, he couldn’t stop thinking about you.

“You came back because of me, didn’t you?”

“What’s going on?” Daehyun stood there breathless, confused as to whether it was a dream or not.

“Come with me.” You dragged him deep into the woods, not saying a word. He had a lot of questions, but he didn’t know which one to ask first, it’s like the lost his tongue. The deeper he went in the more his anxiety went up, he was being dragged by a stranger deep into the woods but for some reason, he couldn’t stop. It was like he was under a spell and he enjoyed every minute of it, he didn’t want this trance to end. The woods got so thick it was hard to avoid trees but after walking for a while he noticed a little cave which he assumed was where you were all this time. You both went in and he sat down on one of the chairs in the cave.

“Why am I so attracted to you? Why did I feel the need to come back here?” He asked and you made your way over to him, put your hand in his pocket and took out the wooden pieces with marks on them.

“This lured you back to me. I needed you to come back.”

“Why?”

“You’ll see.” You smile at him and make him feel at home while you go off into a room that was separated by hanging leaves and feathers.

“What did I just get myself into? I should leave” Daehyun was scared and wanted to go back to the group but no matter how much he tried to convince himself to leave he just couldn’t. He sat in the chair until you came out, his jaw dropped, and he was instantly drawn to you. You stood naked right in front of him, waiting for him to get closer.

“See, I’m a witch and I lure people in.” You whisper in his ear while his fingers get tangled in your hair.

“Oh yeah?” He says breathlessly, standing over you. You can feel his warmth on your skin. You press his lips against his and push into him, he lifts you up and brings you into the other room where he slowly lies you down on the bed that was covered in different furs. He kisses your neck and nibbles on it while his hand massages your breast and plays with your nipple. You moan out his name and he lowers himself to your folds and runs his tongue through them. He slipped two fingers into you and started pumping bringing you closer to an orgasm, you pulled him up before you got the chance to cum. You got on top of him and slipped his throbbing cock into you making both of you moan. He kissed your chest while you bounced up and down his dick edging both of you closer and closer.

“I lure people in here because I feed off them.” You moan out.

“What?” Daehyun stopped and fear clearly made an appearance in his eyes. You kept moving your hips making it hard for him to concentrate. Before he got the chance to react you grabbed the dagger that was on the table next to the bed and stabbed him straight through the chest. Blood splattered everywhere, it wasn’t long before you were covered in it and he was taking his last breaths.

“I’m sorry sweetheart, you were one of the prettier ones.” You rest your hand on his cheek and kiss him while he was on his last breath.

“We need to go back and report this to the police.” Jongup panics.

“We can’t just leave without him.”

The whole group starts arguing about what to do. Daehyun has been missing since this morning and it was 3pm already, they needed to go back to their dorms and inform the agency of Daehyuns disappearance.

“Idol Jung Dae hyun missing since last weekend, the group went to the woods to camp and he went missing that night. There have been no leads so far and no one knows his whereabouts. His bandmates decided to cancel all of their upcoming shows until he’s found. If anyone has any information, please contact your local police station.”

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miraclehope1829 · 7 years

Text

BTS Imagine - Back Hugs

Namjoon (RM)

Namjoon had a deadline tomorrow, and you knew how stressed he has been over meeting this deadline. He would stay up all night, drink an unreasonable amount of coffee. Sometimes he would even skip meals because he had locked himself up in the studio. You were definitely worried about him but you knew that nagging him about taking better care of himself would only cause him more trouble. So you’ve been quietly sitting in this studio for the whole day now, just watching him work. Occasionally bringing him water and some light snack to support him.

It was around 2am when you were half sleep when there were some noises from Namjoon’s desk. It was obvious that he was already at his breaking down but you knew he is really close because you’ve been silently observing his progress. He abruptly stands up causing some of his possessions to tumble. Looking very stressed and enraged, he stomped to the door which was next to the sofa you were sitting on. He swings open the as abruptly as he had gotten up from his desk. You knew he was too close to give up now so intuitively you launched yourself at him, grabbing him from behind.

“Namjoon, I know you’re tired and stressful, but you still have 15 hours left I know you will be able to finish it. I believe in you. But your body needs to rest, I’m sure that a short nap will improve everything. Let’s rest together, I will wake you up later. I promse!” You tell him in a soft voice while locking him a back-hug. Although it took some persuading, he eventually agreed. You dimmed the light down in the studio and Namjoon lay his head down onto your lap. He soon drifted off to sleep with your humming and when he woke up he was energised again.

Seokjin (Jin)

You’ve spend the past week on researching and writing the report for your presentation for work that you had panda eyes. Seokjin has been giving you his full support but sometimes it was not distracting than helpful. And this was one of those times.

You been concentrating on finishing this report tonight so you can take your time in preparing for the presentation in 5 days time. However you were someone that gets distracted very easily, breaking away from your work from the slightest of sounds, which Seokjin wasn’t helping by coming in and out of the room in short intervals of time. He didn’t have bad intentions because you brought in water, fruits and little snacks that would encourage you to work harder but those little encouragement was what stopped you from working hard.

This time when he had walked in with a bowl of tiny M&Ms, you signed out in frustration. Walking to you then placing the bowl next to you and putting a hand on your shoulder. “Y/N what’s wrong? Is everything okay?” You didn’t say anything but you may have showed an angry facial expression even though you actually didn’t feel that way. When he turned around, you were scared. You grabbed his wrist then pulled him into a back hug. “What’s wrong? I thought you’re thirsty so I was going to get you some water.” You couldn’t help but chuckle.

Yoongi (Suga)

Yoongi was someone that really liked his sleep and hated if someone would interpret it, even as his girlfriend you were no exception. Unlike your boyfriend who can sleep in any given time or place, your sleep schedule was irregular and on top of that you’re an night owl. You would be doing a range of different things each night from watching movies, dramas, work or playing games. And most of the time, it would wake Yoongi up in one way or another. As your relationship progressed, you’ve picked up on signs that show your boyfriend might be getting annoyed, and you would move outside before he gets angry.

Tonight, you were playing a game that the boys introduced you to because Yoongi is the only one in the group that isn’t interested in games. Somehow, you must have woken him up while you were playing but you didn’t notice because you were too focused on the game. You were missing all the signs that him starting to get annoyed as you continued to play the game. At one point, he even got up and creeped up to you telling you to stop playing or go somewhere else. Which you told him to wait, that was a bad decision and you knew but you didn’t realise it until it had already left your mouth.

It was too late when you had noticed because he was already heading to the door. Even though Yoongi was angry but he couldn’t physically do anything about it because he had a soft spot for you. Seeing him walk away scared you because he had never done it before. In a flash, you had gotten up and held him tight in your back embrace. “I’m sorry I won’t play anymore, please don’t leave.” Yoongi softly patted your hands that was locked you in place indicating that he wasn’t mad.

Hoseok (Jhope)

Hoseok is an amazing boyfriend that loves you with all his heart and you guys have been maintaining a stable relationship for a little over a year now. your personalities match very well together so any issues would be resolved before there is any arguments. However sometimes your boyfriend can be a little over clingy and protective when he’s feeling insecure, perhaps due to a bad experience in the past.

Starting from last week, you’ve been planning a surprise with your brother because your 2 year anniversary from when you and Hoseok was approaching. You actually just wanted an excuse to surprise him. But Hoseok has been worried about you coming home late and a little suspicious of your constant texting but you shaking him off when he asked about it. When he confronted you about seeing you with a random guy and wouldn’t answer, scared that it would ruin the surprise. (He knows that you have a brother but he has never seen him.)

“Why won’t you tell me what’s going on?” He yelled while still trying to stay calm when you told him it was just your brother and he has nothing to worry about. “If he’s your boyfriend then why can’t you tell me what you guys were doing.” Fed up with your silence, he turned around and storm out of the bedroom heading towards the front door. You wouldn’t let what was meant to be a joyful event to be a disaster, potentially ending your relationship with the best man. Clasping him from the back and gluing yourself to it, explaining everything from start to now. Even though the surprise was ruined, it was better to save the best thing in your life.

Jimin

You were quite the popular girl but not just because you were pretty but due to your kind and caring personality. You got along with your colleagues, has a close group of friends and an amazing boyfriend that loves you a lot. However your life is never just sunshine and rainbows. You were currently in an argument with Jimin over something that you didn’t think wasn’t important.

Just hours before, you attended company dinner where they had asked you to bring a partner or friend to which you obviously invited Jimin because your co-workers have been dying to know who this lucky guy is. But also at the dinner was a colleague that has made it obvious that he’s interested in you. You told Jimin about it and reassured that you’ve been avoiding him but it was difficult at a company dinner and he constantly followed you around. You tried to be nice at a social gathering which Jimin mistakes as flirting which lead to the argument right now.

“I wasn’t flirting with him. How many times do I have to say it?” Yelling back the frustrated Jimin. He didn’t reply, scared that he will say something hurtful. “I’ve told you that I’m avoiding him and there’s no way that I would like him. I even brought you to the dinner so everyone would know I have a boyfriend. What more can I do?” Tears on the verge of falling. Jimin stood up and headed to the door “I need to go cool down.” But you didn’t want to let him go, leaving right now wouldn’t solve the problem. You let yourself be buried into his back, holding him back preventing him to leave. “I rejected him tonight! I told him I have a boyfriend that I can’t live without so please don’t go.” Jimin realized that he had overreacted when he left your tears soaking his back. He turned around, and buried into each other’s embrace.

Taehyung (V)

Your boyfriend had a habit of playing games until very late into the night, you’ve accustomed too. Most of the time you would let him mind his own business because he is capable of making his own decision. However, there are times where Taehyung would spend hours on end in front of the screen even though he fully knows of the jam-pack schedule that he has the next day. In those situations, you would try to persuade him to finish early.

However just a few days ago, Taehyung had become newly obsessed with a new game which he has been playing nonstop. You didn’t care much because you were already used to it. It wasn’t until waking up at 4am in the morning to your boyfriends gaming antics. He becomes really loud when he gets immersed into the game but it doesn’t normally wake you. You sat up leaning against the headboard facing towards the light from the screen quietly observing your boyfriend, which he noticed fairly quickly.

“Did I wake you up Y/N?” Even though you shook your head, Taehyung was worried about you not getting enough sleep. “I think I will go outside to play, I don’t want to disturb your sleep.” As he started to pack up his laptop and other gaming equipment to move outside, you thought that you’ve been feeling a little neglected with his constant gaming that you’ve been sleeping in an empty cold bed. Without thinking and before Taehyung could leave the room, you wrapped your arms around his wrist. “You can stay here, I want to stay with you. You can continue playing, I can sit quietly.” He smiled at your clinginess as he agreed. You sat on Taehyung’s lap as he continued to play, slowly drifting back to sleep.

Jungkook

Unlike your boyfriend, you didn’t play games on a day to day basis. You would enjoy playing some games from time to time or when you were bored on public. In the end, you’d rather watch Jungkook play games than actually playing it yourself. However recently because of Taehyung’s new obsession with a game, your bunny boyfriend has also started to play more than his usual amount.

You guys were in the living room, he was playing games while you read the book that you’ve been slowly working through. You liked to ramble about what you’re reading while normally Jungkook would listen to you attentively even if he would be doing something else. Contrary to the other days, Jungkook wasn’t paying much attention to your usual rambling which at first you didn’t mind because you knew that he was concentrating on the game. but when after he finished a game and he still didn’t answer your questions, you got impatient.

“Jungkook, I asked what you wanted to eat for dinner. Are you not answering?” To your surprise, instead of answering, he started a new game. Angry, you took the remote control out of his hand. He became annoyed that you interrupted his newly started game, that he got up from the couch. Realising that you may have gotten your impatience got the better of you. A back-hug was the only way you can tell him effectively that you were sorry. You held into him tightly. “I’m sorry too, let’s go cook dinner.” As Jungkook dragged you towards the kitchen while you still held onto him tightly.

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georgialouisea · 7 years

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What Coffee is for.

Characters -Dean x Reader, Sam, Zoey (ofc) Word Count - 1500 Warnings - Minor character death, preganncy, fluff. A/N - Written for @thing-you-do-with-that-thing and @like-a-bag-of-potatoes ’ 12 Days of Christmas Challenge. Prompt - Wishing on a star.

“Momma, when will we be home?”

“Soon baby.”

“You said that ages ago.” Your 6-year-old daughter whined, looking over at Dean you couldn’t help the eye roll.

“Sweetie, it will be soon, how about we stop off at the store and get some chocolate milk and cookies for before bed if it’s okay with Mommy.”

“Yeah….” You sighed. “As long as we get wine.” Whispering to Dean.

“I’m with Y/N,” Sam announced.

“I’m pretty sure it’s a well-known fact after dealing with my parents and my aunts and uncles I need wine.”

“Don’t know what you’re talking about they were lovely,” Sam smirked, turning around you shot him a look.

“So chocolate milk and cookies?” Dean asked again glancing in the mirror.

“Yes please!” Zoey beamed from her seat, the pink fluffy blanket covering most of her body.

“Try and get some sleep sweetie.” You urged, it was 7pm and you still had another 2 hours of driving left.

“Okay, I’ll try.”

“Good girl.” Dean smiled at you, glancing in the mirror at Zoey again.

Resting your head against the cool window you couldn’t help the smile on your face. 7 years ago you didn’t think you’d be here when you woke up in the middle of the night to gunshots downstairs. Your boyfriend lay dead downstairs, when two men burst through your bedroom door with guns aimed at you, taking in the sight you blacked out.

Hours later you woke up in hospital, the same two men at your side, the shorter of the two with lighter hair had claimed to be your husband so they could stay with you.

After freaking out and being sedated by a nurse you woke up hours later, thankful that you were still slightly loopy when they explained everything to you, how your boyfriend was killed by a spirit and they were hunters posing as FBI agents.

“Sam, Dean… you need to tell the Doctor I’m pregnant.” You informed them before closing your eyes.

You didn’t know what to believe but you did know your boyfriend was dead and you were pregnant.

Sam and Dean had no idea if the spirit would return and try to kill you too, so they kept you away from the house and instead offered you a hotel room, the room adjoining housed the Winchesters, yet one slept in their room as the other sat watch over you from a chair in the corner.

A bond quickly formed between you and the Winchesters. You didn’t want to go home after how Adam died, instead, you moved out and sold the house for much less than it was worth. Sam and Dean offered you a room in the bunker which you accepted.

Both of them were with you through every step of your pregnancy, somewhere along the line you and Dean became more than friends, you couldn’t pinpoint when it happened but you realised at 4am one day as Dean sat behind you massaging your back trying to help with the pain.

“Dean?”

“Yeah?”

“You don’t have to do this.”

“I want to.”

“Come here a second.” You patted the empty space on the bed before you.

“Sure, you okay?”

“Yeah, I’m good, I just want to talk.”

“Ominous.”

“No, Dean I love you.” Blurting out you slapped your hands over your mouth.

“I love you too.” Dean’s brow furrowed.

“As in I’m in love with you…” You clarified for yourself.

“Y/N.”

“I know it’s four in the morning, I’m hormonal as hell and in pain but I mean it.”

“You’re serious?”

“Yes I am, but if you want to ignore it then that’s fine.”

“No, of course, I don’t want to ignore it, I love you too.”

“You do?”

“Yes.” He leaned forward kissing you, his hands cupping your face. Pulling back you hissed as a new pain hit you. “Still hurts?”

“Yeah.” Sighing you burrowed your head into your pillow.

“Lay down on your side, I’ll stay up all morning if I have to but you’re getting some sleep,” Dean promised, his hands finding the spot on your back which needed the most attention before he began massaging again.

From that morning on you and Dean were joined at the hip. He stayed with you all throughout Zoey’s birth which had been hell on earth for everyone involved.

Adam was put on the birth certificate as Zoey’s Father, writing his name with such pride and sorrow, knowing that night he died protecting you and Zoey from the spirit.

With Dean now your boyfriend he took to raising Zoey so easily, despite your protests that he didn’t have to.

6 years flew by, her first steps, her first words (which were ‘dada’ much to Dean’s amusement) to her first days at preschool.

Now you were here a few days before Christmas driving home from your parents with a trunk full of presents. Dean pulled into the local store, Zoey stirred as Dean shut the door.

“Are we home?”

“No baby, we’re at the store.”

“Is Daddy getting food?” She asked.

“Yeah, he’ll be back soon.”

“Okay.” She yawned

“Baby, you see all those stars?” You watched her look out the window.

“Can I make a wish?”

“Sure can, which one you wishing on?”

“That one, the biggest one.”

“Go ahead.” Smiling as you watched her, Sam looked down at his niece watching her bow her head and whisper something before sitting back up and blowing a kiss to the star.

“What did you wish for baby?” You asked knowing she wouldn’t tell you.

“If I tell you it won’t come true.” Pouting she folded her arms across her chest.

“How about you tell me?” Sam asked.

“Promise not to tell?”

“Promise.” Sam held out his pinky to her.

“Okay.” Nodding she took Sam’s pinky and wrapped hers around it. Sam listened to her as she whispered in his ear, his eyes widened before he bit his lip smiling.

“Good wish?” You asked Sam.

“Such a good wish.” Sam winked at you. Opening your mouth to ask more about her secret wish you were interrupted by Dean opening the door and handing you a few bags.

“What did I miss?”

“Zoey made a wish on a star.”

“What did you wish for baby?”

“Can’t tell you, Uncle Sammy knows.”

“Well okay then.” Dean shrugged before pulling out of the car park and began the 15-minute drive home. “We’ll have to do milk and cookies tomorrow sweetie, it’s late now but we can watch Christmas films tomorrow.”

“Okay, Daddy.” She yawned.

“God we did good.” Dean winked at you.

“Yup.” Nodding you smiled when Dean’s hand found yours.

“Mommy?”

“Yes, sweetie?” You asked turning around to face her, she had her eyes shut and her stuffed unicorn held close to her chest.

“Now you and Daddy are married are you going to have another baby?” She questioned innocently.

“What makes you ask sweetie?”

“Joe’s mommy and Daddy got married and they’re having a baby.”

“Wow.”

“Will you?” She asked again.

“Maybe, we’ll see what happens, sweetie.” Dean glanced at you as he spoke.

“One guess as to what her W-I-S-H was.” Sam whispered as Zoey fell asleep again just as Dean pulled into the garage.

“Oh…” You looked at Sam wide-eyed.

“Yeah, you two have some things to discuss, I can put her to bed if you want and watch her tomorrow,” Sam whispered getting Zoey out of her seat and settling her in his arms.

“That would be great Sam.” Dean accepted the offer of some alone time with you.

“If there’s going to be some niece or nephew making I need some warning.” He warned raising a brow at Dean. “I’m putting her to sleep.”

“Thanks, Sammy,” Dean spoke as he began to unload the trunk to hide Zoey’s presents for Santa to bring.

“So…”

“So…” Dean echoed.

“What do you think?”

“About another kid?”

“Yes.”

“Y/N, I’ve wanted another kid since Zoey was two, I’d love to have another baby with you, hell I’d love to have five more with you.”

“You’re serious?”

“Deadly.”

“Oh my God!” You squealed launching yourself into his arms. “So we have two options for tonight, wrap presents or make a baby …. Both of which involve locking our door.”

“I know which one I’m going for.”

“Oh yeah?”

“Hells yeah.”

5 hours later you woke up in an awkward angle surrounded by ribbons, tape and wrapping paper.

“Dean?” You whispered shaking his shoulder a little.

“Yeah?”

“We fell asleep.”

“I know but we have all day to finish the presents and starting expanding the family, we can have a few more minutes in bed.” Dean wrapped his arms around you pulling you closer to him.

“We need to use Sam’s babysitting service more often.” Yawning you cuddled further into Dean’s chest, sweeping your leg down the end of the bed you kicked all the wrapping supplies off the end of the bed. “It can wait till tomorrow, hey Dean if we’re this tired with one kid we’ll be even more tired with two.”

“That’s what coffee is for baby.” Dean kissed your forehead. “That’s what coffee is for.”

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Forever Taglist - @mega-loser1298 @smalltowndivaj @roxyspearing @ginamsmith @donnaintx @emoryhemsworth

Dean Taglist - @akshi8278 @awesomestperson22 @spn-dean-and-sam-winchester @michellethetvaddict @dramaqueenrolf

SPN Pond Taglist- @dr-dean @thing-you-do-with-that-thing @nichelle-my-belle @leatherwhiskeycoffeeplaid @notnaturalanahi @impala-dreamer @deathtonormalcy56 @samsgoddess @spn-fan-girl-173 @deansleather @curliesallovertheplace @whywhydoyouwantmetosaymyname @waywardjoy @mrswhozeewhatsis @imadeangirl-butimsamcurious @kayteonline @supernatural-jackles @wevegotworktodo @jpadjackles @quiddy-writes @babypieandwhiskey @deantbh @deanwinchesterforpromqueen @memariana91 @plaidstiel-wormstache @teamfreewill-imagine @fandommaniacx @revwinchester @castieltrash1 @supernaturalyobessed @ruined-by-destiel @winchester-writes @faith-in-dean @winchestersmolder @bennyyh @clueless-gold @deanwinchesterxreader @winchester-family-business @4401lnc @teamfreewill92 @just-another-winchester @canadianjelly

@mrswhozeewhatsis Taglist Dean - @thinkwritexpress-official @itsemmyb @ezauraemmaline @charliesbackbitches @crzcorgi @ellen-reincarnated1967 @littlegreenplasticsoldier @gryffindorable713 @deerlululucy @walkingencyclopediaoffandom @growleytria @thegleegeneration @samtomydeanwinchester @sis-tafics @amaranthinecastiel @fandommaniacx @meganwinchester1999 @kittenofdoomage @samanddeanwinchester67 @ferferelli @iridianuniverse @the-morning-star-falls @ackleslaugh @fangirling-instead-of-working @eyes-of-a-disney-princess @kayteonline @spnsimpleman @mamaimpala @winchesterfiesta @sleep-silent-angel @gadreelsforbiddenfruit @trenchcoats-and-bees @jencharlan @skybinx-blog @thebunkerismyhome @feelmyroarrrr @beachy2014 @fandom-book-nerd @tia58 @sams-little-toy @deansleather @faegal04 @sunriserose1023 @saving-things-hunting-family @winchesterswoonathon @jotink78 @lucifer-in-leather @i-dont-know-how-to-write @everyday-supernatural-af @notnaturalanahi @howmanytuesdaysdidyouhave @babypieandwhiskey @besslincoln-bruh @shelovesallthethings @girl-with-a-fandom-fettish @hexparker @atwistoffate @evilskank-inthemegacoven @there-must-be-a-lock

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sinangoral2017-blog · 7 years

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[07.29.17] i recognize that i am ridiculously behind on writing this post, so for those of you who have still been keeping along, i am very sorry! i can explain! let’s rewind.

the in-limbo period of time that i had in between japan and iceland was chaotic, to say the least. consumed with fixing things around the house (our ac broke so i had to readjust the fan unit outside), visiting mom at work, and gearing up for iceland, i got really busy. i was always hoping to write about my downtime in minnesota because, after all, it would’ve been one of the highlights of the summer (I LOVE MINNESOTA). ultimately, i just never had the chance.

in either case, wifi in iceland turned out to be far more limited than i had originally predicted. since i slept in my car most of the nights (more on that later), the only wifi i had access to was when i was filling up at a gas station. even those connections were weak, so the prospect of uploading any text entries, let alone photographs, were minimal. i was sad to admit to myself that the trip couldn’t be shared with you all as i lived it. instead, it had to be relayed after the fact upon my return to the states.

now that things have calmed down a bit and i’m living a slow and sleepy minnesota life, i can take some time to update you and share with you some of the trip’s highlights. though it’s pretty difficult to walk you through 11 days in iceland in one post, i’ll try to do my best.

it makes sense to start with the disappointing email i received from a mycology professor upon taxiing to my gate in iceland, saying that he had decided to take a last minute vacation and couldn’t meet up with me. understandably, these sorts of things happen, but i was pretty bummed that one of my connections had to back out. luckily, my other connections (who were a married couple at the iceland academy of the arts) and i were to meet towards the end of my trip, so in a matter of minutes, i was a free bird with no agenda. as such, i landed in iceland with a certain restlessness that, for some reason, urged me to just hit the road as quickly as i could.

my shuttle bus from the airport to my rental car location was 6 hours late, so i had to bum around the airport. i know – first world problems – but with that agitation that was boiling inside of me to just get rolling, i started to go nuts. nonetheless, several hours later, a sweetheart girl, who couldn’t be more than 19 years old, picked me up. she insisted on carrying my duffel bag and backpack. i could tell that she could tell that i felt a little weird about it. seemingly reciting a speech that she likely gave to many idiotic american males before me, she explained to me how iceland is one of the most feminist, forward-looking, and optimistic countries. as we drove off in the 14 passenger van and she slam-shifted the burly van’s gear shift, i couldn’t help but notice that she was enjoying my slight surprise.

well, i picked up my rental car (a five-speed fiat panda that was a joke compared to my female friend’s bus), bought a map, and hit the road, traveling north towards reykjavik. the only plan i had decided on was to drive through reykjavik and ignore the city, promising myself that i’d spend ample time there upon my return. and so, i kept driving north on the ring road (highway number 1), taking my time, stopping every couple of kilometers or so to soak up the scenery. i took about an hour to stop at a “bonus,” which was the equivalent of a small-sized costco, to pick up sandwich meats, bread, and preservable food. i had heard the horror stories about the food prices in iceland, so i made it a goal to live off of my own concoctions for at least the first six days.

since i knew i would be living out of the panda for the majority of my eleven day trip, i made it a goal to compartmentalize the car into different zones. blame it on my architectural brain, or occasional obsession with specificity, but i had to get comfortable in the car.

the front passenger seat was dedicated to brushing my teeth, trimming my beard, making coffee, and changing clothes, while the driver’s seat was for… driving. nothing too weird up in the first half of the panda.

the rear seat was dedicated for sleeping, but only sort of. since my rather large body didn’t fit easily back there, i would sleep on my left side and swing my legs up through the center console and rest them in the passenger seat. when i’d get tired of this position in the middle of the night, i’d switch sides and sleep on my right side. strangely enough, it felt too awkward to let my feet rest in the driver’s seat when i was in this position, but after the third or fourth night, i found it pretty comfortable to hang my foot off the gear lever if i parked the car in first, third, or fifth. the miserable techniques of an aspiring architect.

the rear hatch was dedicated solely to food, as i ate out of a ‘kitchen’ that i built in the trunk of the panda. two cardboard boxes housed all the plastic cutlery, toilet paper, and rolls of paper towels that i had stolen from the airport. after all, i had to do something productive with my 6+ hours, and i had made the mistake of finishing my book on the plane. i kept all my deli meats, cheeses, jelly, and spreads inside high quality ziploc bags inside an equally heavy duty plastic bag, which i hung from the exterior rear windshield wiper of the panda. this way, i could prevent insect buildup. in addition, the weather was pretty cold overall, so i took advantage of the icy rain and cold wind while i drove and slept to naturally refrigerate my food. with the exception of some dirt that entered the bag on the eastern parts of iceland, this technique worked out pretty well for me.

to compliment my weird program divisions inside the panda, i developed a strict routine of eating, resting, refilling fuel, and begging for free hot water for my french press that i had brought along. strangely enough, it was through this chronology that i was able to tell what time of the day it was, since the all-day brightness was so disorienting. all in all, i charted my travels, favorite locations, and quirky experiences on the aforementioned map, notating for myself as many things as i could recall from the day. i’m hoping to pin up this map on my apartment’s wall when i return to pittsburgh.

i’m going to sound stupid if i try to describe what i saw - it was just too beautiful. color was surreal, mostly because the abundant grays made everything else feel so saturated and accented. while i’ll let the photographs speak for themselves (there’s just no way i can try to explain how beautiful iceland’s landscapes actually are), i’ll share with you two existential moments that i had along my travels, which adequately color the trip for what it was. the first involves a bunch of multicolored sheep at 4am, and the second involves a hitchhiker that i met along the road.

after around the fifth night, having a full night’s rest became a great difficulty, and i started to have lucid dreams as i fell in and out of sleep. this particular night, i woke up to find that what i had thought was an ingenious plan to hang black tshirts from my rollup windows to block sunlight was actually a horrible decision. a zillion mosquitos were in my car. not 10, not 100. a bagilion. just like the horror movies. i had idiotically parked near a marsh/swamp for the night, and all the stupid insects had crawled through the gaps in the windows. here’s an excerpt from an email i wrote to an important friend about the event, which adequately captures my inner turmoil:

despite the success of this leg of the trip with camping inside the car, last night was a disaster. i woke up to ten thousand mosquitoes inside the panda at 445a because i'm an idiot and fool and i left the windows open because i'm an idiot and fool. i knew nothing else than to drive like a madman with windows down for two hours to get rid of them, eventually ending up in little town. weather is overwhelmingly foggy and don’t want to drive because it's a bit unsafe. i can't see these ****ing suicidal sheep that come out of god's **s onto the road and baaaaaa and bleep around. and the farmers spray paint their butts to know whose is whose so i just see these little pink and blue and red butts galloping towards and away from me through the fog. it's slightly poetic but also so maddening. and i guess, at this point, i break down, knowing that this hell is sent from the gods and that they're rightfully directed at me. ***k ***k ***k stupid sheep ***k.

i don’t think i can look at sheep in the same way, to be honest.

several days later, on a random impulse, i decided to pickup a hitchhiker that i found just outside of hella, iceland. jeanne, who turned out to be a total sweetheart, was french-canadian. we stuck together for the whole day, visited a couple of waterfalls, and talked about the weirdest stuff. later, we stopped by the side of the road and pet some random horses. wouldn’t you? it’s amazing how comfortable you can get with someone you don’t know and know you likely won’t see again, simply in light of the fact that you are both blank slates to each other. you have nothing to lose. so those several hours we spent together were really nice.

my time with jeanne also made me realize how lonely a solo traveler can feel in iceland. again – first world problems – but a reality for me, nonetheless. iceland, no matter how grateful i was for the experience, should’ve been absorbed with someone else, at the very least. it was just too beautiful and esoteric to have been lived through alone. i find that relaying my experiences with my mom and minnesota friends has become quite difficult, because the picturesque scenery i’m trying to depict seem exaggerated. and as cathartic and uplifting as iceland was for my health, i wish i had shared that with someone else as well.

when i finally finished the long loop around iceland, i had three to four days to soak up reykjavik, so i checked in at the cheapest hostel i could find and explored the city by foot. i had great beer, good grocery-store food, and occasional splurges on drip coffee. it was during this time that the married couple i was scheduled to meet informed me of a sudden family emergency – one which forced them to fly out of the country last minute.

this brings me to the guilt that i felt about missing out on my mycology connections in iceland, despite how much it was out of my control. i keep asking myself: what if i had planned for just one more resource? was three really enough? of course, i know that these things happen, and that i should learn from this, but an underlying sense of embarrassment still resides. originally, i had hoped to visit japan and iceland to soak up 50% of research and knowledge from both, but i’m now realizing how naïve that was. iceland, in the end, turned out to compliment japan as a therapeutic release from my everyday worries – something that arguably is extremely important, especially as i delve into my fifth and final year of school – but also something which admittedly steers away from the original thesis-based proposal i had put forward to carnegie mellon.

i was lucky enough to fly through boston, both on my way to and from iceland, and see several important people in my life. i stayed with nick, who was my best friend and roommate at grinnell college before i transferred. though i wasn’t able to see the wonderful temple rea, i got to annoy his awesome sister, walton, for an afternoon. i even got to see the handsome and well-dressed kyle wing in the city, which was a blast. the rest of my time was spent soaking up the boston public library, perusing random bookstores, and gawking at MIT’s media lab and campus. ultimately, boston was a wonderful reprise for me as i get ready to return to pittsburgh.

i have spend quite some time wondering if i should keep this blog going or not. i likely will for thesis, but i’m not sure if i’ll start a new one or just continue on this platform. more on that after i talk with my advisers on the matter. i think i need a springboard for thoughts, i just don’t know if i should start over or not.

nonetheless, i’m so incredibly grateful for the opportunities i’ve had throughout this summer to travel, learn, and live. i still cannot believe how this fantasy became a reality, so to my donors, department, university, and mom’s patience, thank you.

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adventurousobservations · 6 years

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Spring into the rest of the year.

1st March is what we usually refer to as the first day of Spring, but due to adverse weather conditions, Spring has been postponed in the UK until further notice. For me, the weather conditions closely mimic my recent mental state. It’s a blizzard, and the madness won’t end. Snow keeps piling up and the winds keep blowing. Being in my second year of my university course, the work keeps piling up, and my other responsibilities keep howling at me for attention. Starting the year with 2 exams, 2 assignments due almost immediately after, and then shortly after that 4 deadlines within 4 weeks, as well as materials to revise and lectures and labs to attend, it all just got a little bit too overwhelming. And by a little, I mean a lot. It seemed impossible. And even when one thing was complete and I would bask in my success, it wasn’t long before I felt crushed by the weight of the next thing to come.

It was an endless cycle of assignments and resposibilities and pressures, with me trying to make my way through whilst also pretty sure that it would never end. People would tell me “Don’t stress” and I just thought “What else am I suposed to do?” Definitely not the right mindset, and I knew that, but I didn’t know how to get out of it. I kept being told to take care of myself, to do things for me, and to just keep working through all the deadlines, to take it one step at a time and that everything would be okay. But I never felt okay. I kept thinking that if I took time out “for me” then I would fall behind, then I would get even more stressed trying to catch up. I thought that my steady pace through those deadlines wasn’t steady enough, and that no matter how hard I tried it would never be enough. I was stuck in a toxic trap of negative thoughts that fed other negative thoughts, my positivity screaming at me to be let out but I thought I didn’t know how. I felt completely alone. I was surrounded by loving, supporting family and friends, but I felt like I was trapped in a stone cell that was impenetrable to any positivity.

It was my birthday and I woke up at 4am. My head full of thoughts of complete frustration and overwhelming sorrow that I couldn’t do it anymore. I checked my phone and saw the texts wishing me happy birthday, but still felt disconnected. I didn’t see the point anymore. Through it all, I knew that I loved what I was learning. But it didn’t feel like enough to get through the stress and the chaos in my mind. In that moment I thought to myself that I needed to reach out for help. So I went next door and got into bed with my mum, and cried to her for about an hour while she kindly listened and then suggested things that I might do. I still felt overwhelmed, but at least I didn’t feel so alone. I then got a phone call from my boyfriend to say happy birthday, and he also kindly listened and then suggested things that I might do. I didn’t feel like I could cope with university that day, and since it was my birthday anyway I gave myself the day off. And as my friends noticed that I wasn’t in university, they asked if I was okay, and shared advice as I told them what was wrong.

I was frustrated with myself for allowing myself to stay in such a frustrated, negative, stressful and intoxiacting mindset for so long. But the contrast from that to the next step, knowing I wasn’t alone, that I was capable of doing anything I set my mind to, that just because something is hard doesn’t mean it is impossible. To go from the snowstorm of negativity to the spring of positive living. It’s not even a complete process yet, but the transformation is already a dramatic significance for me.

So as I continue to turn it all around and see positive, I decided to make March my month of me. Not by being selfish and making everyone realise that the whole world revolves around me, but by doing things that build me up, give me passion and purpose, and just make my soul feel good. So despite the dreary cold outside, and despite the continuous mountain of snowy school work that continues to pile on top of me, I am making my effort to bring in the spring, and then spring into the rest of the year. I have no doubt that there will be more pitfalls on my path, but I am determined to make my way through and out the other side, learning and loving along the way.

Day 1: I found a recipe for a homemade body scrub (which works magnificently and you should all try it https://www.onegoodthingbyjillee.com/how-to-make-exfoliating-scrub-for-silky-smooth-legs) which is so cliche, but I had found that even showering was becoming dificult because I didn’t enjoy the boring routine of it. So doing something different to take care of my body was a small step forward.

Day 2 (today): I wrote about what’s been on my mind so that other people know what’s been on my mind/can not feel alone about what might be on their mind/just because I enjoy writing what’s on my mind and haven’t done it in a while.

#march #love #doyou #bekindtoyou #loveyourself #mental health #seepositive

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adamwilliaminglis · 6 years

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Recovery.

Some, or perhaps, all know I have been recovering from two surgeries. Confined to bed rest and a ridiculous quantity of tablets every day.

I won't share which medications if I haven't already: (See, Memory Loss, in a moment.) But its 32 pills a day. 8 tablets in four stages. The last stage keeps me awake until 4am. I wake at 7am.

They call this period of drugged-out-your-mind semi-consciousness ‘Recovery’.

The trouble with medication designed to intercept and alter signals from parts of my body, namely my sciatic nerve, and my spine, is that my desire to remain mentally active is putting tension on the whole system.

Yes, this is stupid, why don't I just sleep for three weeks?

Well, because the tablets have charged me with an almost electrifying sense of creativity.

I'm a writer. This cannot be ignored.

For everything else there is going on in life, I am trying to become this vision of myself, first and foremost. I get this right, I build the rest upon it. I'm not talking about financial matters here, in that regard I am sound with my primary job and grateful for that fact. It changes nothing with this situation I find myself in, though.

When 'Lucid', I'm more active on Twitter than I have ever been, I've decided, at some point, that this is important to me. I have no justification for that right now because as I write this, I feel an intense sense of dread about it.

I have made something like 145 new followers, give or take, in the last week (I had 130 to start with, and dropping.) I have spoken with the new ones. All of them. Some briefly; a quick, but sincere 'Hi, thanks for following me, etc.,' and some I have become friendly with, sharing personal feelings, and, god help them, writing.

Which let's face it, might as well be my still beating heart.

When that creativity wanes, which I fear is when the drugs begin to ease off, I still have the desire to connect, but now it's more emotional.

I'm wearing that same heart, but this time it's a version I didn't even want visible, out in the open. Unprotected, for some reason. Who put it there? Why are my words all over the place?

It's like I've butchered my personal thoughts in the twitter abattoir, covering everyone in viscera, and I can't understand why can't I remember. I remember the words; the people; the conversations. I just don't understand why they are out there.

I noticed that some friends of mine are getting sick of me talking.

I am getting messages ignored entirely, and I understand why. The Impact, or rather, the fucking price I am paying, is my ridiculous emotional metronome.

A lot of this is in my head. My short-term memory is shot. I am repeating myself, asking for validation, overly worrying about responses being pitched at the right level. Worrying if I am offending people I care about by being a needy little bitch about everything.

I have cried three times this week at absolutely nothing.

Once because I couldn't count the tablets out into containers for the day, (I can't be trusted to self-service during the day because if my mind has deteriorated, I will incorrectly dose. It happened one day, I spent the whole night high as a kite in the way that isn't fun. I woke up hallucinating, albeit, too briefly to tell the surgeon right away. Later, I did. I got new drugs, and I've handed responsibility to my wife.

[For a frame of reference, I have cried three times in the last 15 years.] Once was at a Clint Mansell gig as he played "Together we will live forever" from The Fountain (Darren Aronofsky movie soundtrack.) I will cry every time. There is nothing wrong with being upset about things like that, though, I don't think its a problem being emotional. For some, it's catharsis.

It's just not me. I'm about as stoic as they come. Now I just freak out that I've done something wrong.

I'm not designed for this sort of dumbing down and am deeply frustrated by the fact that my IQ, or whatever you want to call it, has been turned down to 3, and my EQ ramped up to 11.

This is an abnormal function for me.

I'm loving art, writing, writers. New friends. Old ones. And music. My god, the music. I put headphones on today, and it was the end of any hope I had to be reasonable. I felt this intense wave of sadness.

I feel it for people I don't know and their gofundme to buy a bed for their house because they don't want a second-hand one. Too fucking right you don't, nor should you have to. I feel it for people I wouldn't even see, usually, and I feel it with a higher intensity than I have ever experienced, and it has ruined something, while simultaneously improving my character.

Somewhere between these extremes is a happy medium. I don't want to go back to full sober, cold, guarded, quick to react, slow to calm. Sharp. I don't want this overflow of emotion either.

I want the creativity, but am terrified I am going to recover, and it be missing.

#Recovery Medication Twitter

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findingkaraskye · 7 years

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V: Anxiety - Part 2

I’ve been going back and forth in my mind about sharing this part of my anxiety, just because it touches on a very personal...person and their effect on me. I won’t mention the name, some people might know exactly who it is, some people might have a clue, some won’t even know.

To begin though, I want to stress that I am doing my best and trying my absolute hardest to not put the blame on this person. I don’t want to put blame on someone else for my anxiety, but it’s hard when they became a part of it. Hm... blame. I should do a follow up post after this one about the factor of blame and how much it affects me as well.

This part of my anxiety has to do with disclosure of emotions and things that one might normally keep to themselves. It’s sharing parts of yourself that terrify you, and the sharing terrifies you more. And I know I’m sharing a lot on this blog, but just know that even typing each word in each post scares the hell out of me. There are moments when I just want to stop what I’m doing and delete this entire thing. But I won’t. I think I’ve shared enough for people to deserve more. Though I don’t owe anyone anything.

Where to start... I met this person a while ago. Seven years ago I think? In those seven years we fell out of touch. He went away to school or something, and I was here in Virginia graduating high school and going to university. And then in October, we ran into each other once more at a bar. I recognized him. I wasn’t sure if I should say anything. To be honest, I was out that night meeting with another guy who had been asking me on dates for weeks and weeks, and I decided to just finally hang out with him and invite a group of friends so that I wouldn’t feel weird with him alone. But this old friend caught my eye. And I yelled out his name, and said hi. And the rest... well, long story short: in our second beginning when we exchanged numbers at the bar and continued to text and snapchat, and when we hung out the first two times, I decided that I hated him. I thought he was immature even though he was older than me. I thought he was insensitive, and I thought he was selfish. The first time he kissed me, I didn’t kiss him back, and he was hurt, and I literally said, “what makes you think I would even want to kiss you?” But a couple months after October, I was out at bars with other people, but I couldn’t stop thinking about him. And then it all started. Us together.

I have a knack for unfortunately never listening to my best friend’s instincts. I’ll name names now. Rebekah, my best friend, has always had this amazing instinct about people. Almost all the other guys I’ve briefly dated she’s said she had a bad feeling about, and literally EVERY TIME she was right. And she hadn’t even met this guy yet, she heard his voice at her end of the phone when he was in my car, and she already didn’t like him. I wish I had listened.

Anyway, he was someone I fell for too quickly I think. I still beat myself up about this. After we began dating, I think he immediately stopped doing the things he did to get me in the first place. I loved going out and enjoying moments with friends and exploring, He never wanted to go. Unless it was his friends. I love, LOVE doing the whole movie thing, going to a movie theater, getting the tickets, and watching the movie, leaving afterwards to discuss it. He never wanted to go to the movies. He never took me. All our time was spent at his house. He never wanted to come to mine, when I would drive 20 minutes to his as soon as he wanted to see me. All we did was lay around in bed, watch tv, eat, and lay back around. Not much being said, just on our phones. One time, I decided to bring a book with me to pass the time. It was a beautiful book, and I cried finishing the last chapter, and he judged me. He told me I was crazy for crying. I’ve always been a person who strongly shares my emotions. Crying, laughing, smiling, anything else. And he wanted me to tone it down. The first time I had a panic attack at his house, it was 3am. We were sleeping, and I woke up suddenly with that huge rush of anxiety, and got off the bed, sat on the floor and cried. He eventually woke up and told me to just stop crying and go to sleep. Gave me a small hug. I didn’t expect him to know how to deal with my panic attack, but in the back of my mind, all I could think was... that’s it? I couldn’t stop crying, and I decided to leave. At 4am, I drove the 20 minutes back home to take a hot shower, get into my own bed, and sleep alone. There were small moments when he could be sweet. Opening doors for me, cooking for me, bringing me my favorite flowers on my birthday, showing up to my work to surprise me with a birthday present, and playing with my brothers. But outside of that, I don't know why I stayed. One night, we were out getting ready to go to the bars with his friends, and another friend called him on his phone. He was on the phone for the longest time. But I got so hurt when I heard him say, “yeah, I’m out with Kara...she’s just this girl I’ve been talking to.” It hurt so much hearing this. Another time, we got into an argument when I asked him to clarify whether we were really together or not, because he was confusing me. He told me, “we’re dating, but we’re not together.” And I thought I could wait it through to really be together with him. When we were out, everyone regarded us as boyfriend and girlfriend. He would tell other girls at bars who hit on him that he had a girlfriend, so I did the same when other guys spoke to me. I loved showing him off on Snapchat, or to friends. He never did the same with me. One time, he pretended to break up with me while I was having a really hard weekend full of my dark moments, and I cried and cried. Until he admitted that he was just joking and that I was crazy for thinking it was real. He called me crazy so much, I started to believe it. When I think about it now, I wasn’t happy, but I still believed we could make it. I wish I hadn’t stayed for so long.

Obviously I’ve shared some stuff on here already about how I’ve grown up with a tough life. Dad going to jail, being depressed at an early age, and there’s so much more. The first guy I loved ended up dying last year. And all these things, I slowly revealed and shared with this guy. I told him that my dad wasn’t really my dad, but that I have a biological father who isn’t around much anymore. And I told him that it had been hard thinking of my dad as a dad presently. He told me not to take it too hard. I told him about the first guy I loved passing away, he told me to move on. He took my depression and anxiety as a way to get drugs (medication). He tried to tell me that I only had depression and anxiety because I read sad books and poems and listened to depressing music (which I really don’t think I do). He misinterpreted my super empathy for music and art and books, as something wrong with me. And it just hurt so much that I shared the deepest parts of myself with him, only for him to hurt me with one last argument and never speak to me again.

The sad thing is... there was one day I woke from a nap at his house, and he was sitting next to me on his laptop, sending out emails for a job. And I watched him and thought, “I could really love this guy.” Wow, I was so dumb.

I now know that it was all emotional abuse. I wish I had known it wouldn’t work with the crazy-calling and his unwillingness to commit. I wish we hadn’t gotten so many other people involved. I thought his parents were amazing. I loved playing with his nephews. He hung out with my family so much. But everything behind the facade was filled with so many negative emotions.

The point of this post isn’t about him. It’s about sharing personal parts of myself. I shared some of the deepest parts of myself that I had kept hidden away, because these are things I’m so afraid to reveal, because I feel like they will push people away. And I revealed these things, and he had nothing for me. And it really, truly hurt. I’ve shared some of those deep things in this post. And this entire blog is one of those deep things. I had always been terrified of sharing with others that I was depressed, and the things I do to myself with depression.

My anxiety lies within the disclosure of myself. It is so scary to share those parts of yourself that you’re afraid of, it’s scary to think of the effects it will have on others. I hope whoever reads this knows... It takes everything in me whenever I write these posts. It’s terrifying to type each word. Ugh, I’m starting to cry, so I’ll end this off here. But there is true anxiety and fear in sharing personal information. And it really sucks when you share it with someone you cared for...just to have them brush it off.

#depression #healing #mental healing #anxiety #relationships #disclosure #fear

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