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#working through resentment and coming out friends again
starsinthesky5 · 2 days
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why do you like me so much then? || joe burrow x reader
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description: why do you like him so much? everything you said made him sound like a lackluster boyfriend, so why did you like him so much?
a/n: this is either really bad, chaotic, all over the place, or just yapping. sorry. the fact that this was supposed to be a blurb?? yeah. i cannot write blurbs LOL.
thanks to @joeyb1989 and my anons for giving me inspo for this! and to joe with that sexy, bratty eyebrow raise that I can never move on from
word count: 9.2 k
warnings: angstttt, smutttt, fluff
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3 hours. That's how long it took you to get ready tonight.
You spent an uncharacteristic amount of time carefully positioning each strand of your hair, ensuring that each piece was perfectly curled and set. You made sure every piece of jewelry from your delicate necklaces to your sparkling earrings and bracelets, all of which were gifted by your boyfriend, shimmered in the warm light and reflected a soft glow. Each stroke of makeup had to look flawless to complete the look, your eye shadow blending in seamlessly as you perfected your small winged eyeliner. The silk sage green slip-on dress you wore–with a delicate lace trim–fit your body like a glove; highlighting every aspect of your beautiful figure perfectly. 
You looked amazing and you felt amazing for the first time in a long time. The past few weeks had been filled with strangeness and ambiguity and you were in desperate need of a change of pace. The strangeness came from how you and Joe had been a bit distant from each other lately, which was uncommon for you two. You were constantly attached at the hip, utterly fixated on each other to the point where the mere thought of being apart would lead to a state of misery and endless complaining. But this past month, you couldn’t be more disconnected from each other. Joe had been so wrapped up with football training this past month to the point where it felt like you two barely saw each other, and that didn't sit well with either of you. You always used to make so much time for each other no matter what, but recently it felt like you two stopped trying.
Every time you thought of planning something to do together such as a little lunch date at your favorite cafe, or a relaxed hike around the park, even just ordering takeout and eating together on the couch while watching a movie, it would always get moved or put off till the next week because Joe had something come up. Either it was more training (which was understandable), more brand shoots (somewhat understandable), or even because he wanted to hang out with the guys--completely not understandable. 
You were never the kind of girlfriend who would keep her boyfriend away from his friends, especially because you actually really liked Joe's friends and greatly appreciated the support they gave him, but when he started using them as an excuse to pass on spending time with you, that's when you became a bit bitter. You were the most understanding person when it came to the things Joe had going on in his life. You knew that he had a lot on his plate and couldn't always be fully present for you, but he always tried his best to be. Or at least he used to. 
Passing on training and brand-related work was hard, but passing on hanging out with his friends once or twice so he could go through with the plans he made with his girlfriend was fairly easy. 
It should be easy, right?
But Joe didn’t do that. He instead moved your plans to hang out with them, and that hurt. He said that you could do the lunch date, hike, or takeout food & movie evening later on, but that 'later' rarely came around. He would just get swamped with more things and you'd be so focused on your work that you couldn't bother to bring up the subject again. 
Joe noticed your increased irritation as well, but he just never said anything because he didn’t feel like it was anything serious, just you in a mood. He wasn't sure what made you so resentful all of a sudden, but he knew better than to argue with you about your sudden mood swings, especially because he knew there could be over 100 reasons for them and didn't really want to set you off even more by pointing it out. 
What Joe did notice was that you two hadn't had much one-on-one time like that recently–completely oblivious to the fact that's exactly why you were so bitter–so he decided to take the first step and offer to take you to dinner at the end of the week. You were so excited when he proposed the idea of going to dinner on Friday, looking forward to spending some much-needed quality time with the person you loved the most. He told you that he'd take you to this new steakhouse in Downtown Cincinnati and then he'd take you down to the banks so you two could lay against the grassy field and look up at the stars together, something you used to do every weekend during the off-season but something had slowly fizzled out as time went by and your weekends became a bit more intense. 
"Every star in the universe reminds me of how much I love you. You’re not just a part of my world; you are the center of my galaxy, and everything else revolves around the love we share," is what he told you the first time you went stargazing. Those special words have stuck with you ever since, especially the part about how you’re the center of his galaxy, but lately, it started to feel like the center of his galaxy had shifted to something other than you. You couldn't figure out when things shifted; those genuine, pacifying moments you two shared became scarily rare. In the back of your mind, you felt like you were losing him. Even though you weren't, it just felt like it, and that was the worst feeling out of them all. Nothing you did or he did made that thought go away. What you didn't or he didn't do is what made it worse. 
You were determined to use this date as a way to move things back on track in your relationship, hopefully even talking about how off things had been lately, so that’s why you dedicated an unusual three hours to primping and preparing. Despite your efforts to achieve perfection, Joe’s love for you was unwavering, regardless of your appearance. He adored your natural beauty, free of makeup, and cherished your tousled, messy hair. He found you just as enchanting in your old gray sweats and one of his worn-out college t-shirts that made you look oh-so tiny. You knew how indifferent he was to perfection, but you wanted everything to be excellent tonight, even if he didn't need it to be. You needed this. 
You were filled with anticipation as you imagined walking into the restaurant with him, the warmth of his hand in yours. You could almost taste the first sip of wine, feel the soft buzz it would bring, and sense the rush of emotions as you immerse yourself in the familiar and comforting bubble of your love for each other. You needed to feel that again so badly.
You took one final look in the mirror, "Damn, I look good. He’s going to love this," you whispered to yourself as your eyes navigated up and down your figure before giving yourself a small nod of approval and exiting the bathroom. You grabbed your white chanel handbag which was one of the many birthday gifts he had gotten you last month and made your way out of the shared bedroom and down the stairs, a big smile on your face as you were expecting an adorable, dressed, and ready Joe awaiting your arrival. But as you reached the last few steps, your smile dropped as you were met with the exact opposite. 
You were met with a Joe dressed in gray sweatpants and an old LSU tee whose back was facing you while he was sitting on the couch, had his headset on, and was playing video games on the TV. 
"Today is Friday, right?" you whispered to yourself as you pulled your phone to read the date, which showed that it was in fact Friday and you weren't crazy.
"Joe?" you called out as you slipped your phone back into your bag, slowly walking down the couple of steps you had left with a look of sheer confusion on your face. He didn't hear you, but you heard him.
"Aye, man. What the fuck?" he said loudly as he started aggressively pushing the buttons on his game controller. "How the hell did you get to level 10 when it's only been a week since the last time we played?".
His friends. He was playing with his friends. 
"Of course," you scoffed as you walked over to the living room where he was, throwing your handbag onto the dining table before calling out for him again. "Joe?.... Joeeeee?" you said louder from behind him, but he still didn't look back at you. 
"He has to be fucking ignoring me. There is no way his headset is this soundproof," you thought to yourself as you shook your head and walked around the couch to come into his view. 
Joe looked over and saw you walking towards him, his eyes giving you a quick once-over before settling on your soft eyes which had a slow burning fire behind them. "You look nice," he mumbled to you before looking back at the TV. While he may not have looked directly at you, his words were genuine–he couldn't help but admire your alluring beauty.
“....Thanks...,” you replied with a dubious tone. “Did you forget that it’s Friday?” you asked him as you looked over at the screen and then back down to him, no response yet again. 
“No, don’t go that way,” he warned his friends through the headset, completely ignoring what you just asked him.
“You’ve got to be kidding me,” you thought to yourself again.
“Joe? Hellooo?” you called out again but waved your hands for him to see you from the corner of his eye, which he did but didn’t say anything. You were becoming increasingly annoyed with his lack of attention towards you, especially since you knew he could see you and see that you were trying to get his attention. 
"Do you need something?" he finally asked as he moved one side of his headset off his ear, still too focused on the game and his friends to focus in on your conversation. 
"Do I need something? Yes, I fucking need something. I need my boyfriend to go on our date with me which he promised to take me on," you thought to yourself, wanting nothing more than to scream into a pillow.
"Baby, it's Friday," you took a deep breath and said, crossing your arms as you tried to prevent yourself from flipping out on him.
"Yeah, I know," he softly laughed, putting the headset back on again and going back to the game, not even bothering to wait and listen if you had anything else to say, which you did.
You were absolutely dumbfounded by his actions; it was clear that he was intentionally overlooking you. Joe knew you wouldn't bother him like this without a good reason, especially during his video game time with his high school buddies, so his behavior was completely unjustified. 
"Did he forget?" you thought to yourself, feeling your heart break a little at the thought. There was no way he forgot, right? He was the one who planned this date, how could he forget?
Your expression softened as you asked him, "Did you forget?". You didn't really want to hear his response because deep down, you already knew the answer. Admitting it meant that he actually forgot about you.
But you didn't need to hear his response because there was no response. 
You looked back and forth between him and the TV, seeing how he was practically looking right through you and pretending as if you weren’t standing there in the most date-night outfit ever. Joe was oblivious sometimes, but he wasn’t that oblivious.  
“Fuck this,” you mumbled, deciding to take matters into your own hands since he wasn't listening and didn't look like he was planning on listening. You walked over to the TV, grabbed the plug from the outlet behind it, and yanked it so hard that you could've pulled out the entire electrical system in the wall. 
"Y/N, what the hell?" you heard from behind you, as well as the sound of Joe taking his headset off and throwing it down onto the couch. 
"Oh, so now you acknowledge my presence?" you rolled your eyes and sighed heavily. 
"What the hell is that supposed to mean?" he asked you, his eyebrows furrowed as if he was genuinely confused. 
"What do you think? I called out your name like 4 times and got no response. Then when I actually got your attention, or I thought I did, you didn't even answer my question fully and brushed me off like I was just some girl," you said as you walked closer to him, the built-up bitterness inside of you begging to be released. 
"You're not just some girl," he shook his head. "You're my girlfri-," he began to say before you interrupted him. 
"Oh yeah? Then act like I am. I asked you a question and you completely ignored it and ignored me," you grumbled as you gave him a look that he instantly knew meant you were genuinely pissed off. 
"What do you mean? I did answer your question," he shrugged. 
"Fucking barely? I told you it was Friday and was hoping that would ring a bell but it didn't, and then I asked you if you forgot but you had already put your dumb fucking headset on and either didn't hear me or didn't want to hear me," you snarled, rolling your shoulders back as the tension in your body increased and put a strain on your upper body. 
"Ohhh, it's Friday? So what?" he sarcastically laughed while shaking his hands, then stood up and practically towered over you. You hated when he did this whenever you two got into a little disagreement, it felt like he was showing the power he had over you and made you feel 10 times smaller. 
"Are you serious?" you asked, feeling the heat rising in your cheeks and your eyes beginning to well up with tears. It wasn't sadness that caused the tears, but a deep sense of anger. 
"What did I forget hmm? Because I'm pretty sure that I already did the laundry, cleaned up the kitchen from lunch, ordered the groceries, and watered your plants outside," he asked, the bratty tone in his voice making you want to scream into a pillow and then proceed to hit him with said pillow. 
You felt your bottom lip tremble as your entire body felt a wave of sadness overpower the anger you were feeling. 
He really forgot. 
He didn't forget to do all the other things that weren’t that big of a deal, but what he did forget was the most important thing.
"Our...our date, Joe?" you choked out, feeling a tear fall from your eye it felt like the world went silent. "Our fucking date," you said again, this time with more anger in your voice, wiping the tear trail from your cheek. So much for your flawless makeup. 
Joe's heart immediately sank at the mention of the word 'date.' He had completely forgotten about the plans you had made, the plans he had made. How could he have forgotten something like this? He knew how important this date was; it was the first time in a long time that you two got to spend alone time together away from everything. Even though he never said it, he felt awful that each time you tried to plan something together, it was pushed back for some reason and never thought about again. 
His eyes softened as he realized why you were mad, "Y/N, I'm so sorry...I forgot," he said. 
You remained quiet for a few seconds, trying to calm yourself by taking a few deep breaths but that wasn't really working. "I shouldn't be surprised you forgot, you know? I've been practically invisible to you this past month," you scoffed, a few more tears falling from your eyes unknowingly. 
"Invisible?" Joe questioned, a bit taken aback by your harsh response. Yeah, he had been spending less time with you lately, but in no way were you invisible to him. 
"Yeah, invisible. It's like I'm just not here. You've been basically avoiding spending time with me and the one time you offer to plan something, you conveniently forget. Spare me, Joe," you shook your head and said. 
"Woah, I wouldn't say I'm avoiding spending time with you?" he said as he took a step closer to you. "I've been busy, you know I've been busy,".
"I get that, but what about those times when you ditched doing something with me so you could do something with the guys? I understand if it’s because of training and stuff but getting ditched for your friends? That hurts. Especially when we already had plans but you moved them and little old me always went along with it because I didn't want to rock the boat," you cried, your tears breaking through and free-falling down your cheeks now. 
"Rock the boat? What are you...what are you even talking about?" he threw his hands in the air and asked. "What the hell is she talking about? I know we've been spending less time together, but in no way is the boat being rocked. We're fine?" he thought to himself. 
"Here you go with the oblivious act," you laughed through the tears in amusement. "Un. fucking. believable. You always do this whenever you’re in the wrong, and frankly, I’m sick of it. You're acting as if I haven't been visibly miserable the past few weeks. Oh, wait. That's just it, how would you know? I'm invisible to you," you said, your voice a little louder as the anger was once again taking over. 
"Look, I don't know what the fuck I did but I don't understand why you're blowing up over this," Joe said, his hand moving to scratch the back of his neck. 
"That's just it. It's mostly what you didn't do. You didn't bother to reschedule our plans, you didn't bother to check in on me to see if I was really okay with you moving our plans, and you didn't fucking remember we were supposed to go out tonight," you yelled, your breaths becoming shorter as you felt yourself turning red from slight distress. You felt awful for yelling at him, but all of the emotions you had built up this past month were coming out at once and it was not going to be pretty. 
Joe stood in silence, his eyes fixed on you as you continued to express your disappointment with his recent behavior as your boyfriend. He felt a sense of unease as he realized the impact of his actions on your emotions. He knew he was in the wrong, but he was hoping you understood how hectic his schedule was and how that prevented him from giving his all to you recently. 
You always understood. And if you didn't, you talked to him about it. But this time you didn't do either of those things, and that made him a little upset. Communication was a big part of your relationship and although it had been pretty off this past month, he thought you would’ve said something to him if you felt this bad about everything. 
"You know, instead of yelling at me about all of this, why didn't you just talk to me about it in the first place?" he asked, now feeling a bit irritated himself. "If you felt so 'invisible' why didn't you tell me right then and there?". 
"Are you really blaming me for this?" you said, looking at him in disbelief. It was unbelievable that he was trying to ignore your feelings, especially when you rarely blew up on him like this so that should tell him that you were really hurt by all of this.
"I never…I never said that," he said while sucking his bottom lip in. "All I'm saying is that we didn't need to have this big argument about it if you just talked to me about how you were feeling before,".
"That still wouldn't change the fact that you forgot about tonight," you snapped, placing your hands on your hips. When your hands touched the smooth, silky fabric of your dress, it seemed to emphasize every curve of your body, catching Joe's gaze for a moment. He felt a flutter of excitement in his stomach as he admired your figure once more, taking in every detail of your stunning appearance a bit closer than he did before. "You still haven't given me a reason," you added.
Joe's frustration was growing as he felt increasingly annoyed by your words, despite his understanding that he had made a mistake. Instead of fixing the issue, your yelling was only aggravating the situation. "You know what? Fine. I forgot. Whoops. My bad," he retorted in a tone that was both monotonous and bratty. He went quiet for a moment, thinking of a devious plan to make you even more annoyed. 
But why did he enjoy making you feel irritated? Because he liked seeing you get all hot and bothered because of him. "I forgot because I was having a great time with my friends and lost track of time. I guess they were more interesting than you," he said smugly.
He knew he was being an absolute dick right now, but part of him was having fun watching you get heated over this and wanted to see you get more flustered. “Is it bad that I think she looks hot as fuck right now?” he thought to himself. 
"God, your fucking attitude pisses me off sometimes," you yelled. As you shook your head, you couldn't help but feel another wave of anger towards him, even though looking around, you realized that the issue at hand was frankly trivial. It wasn't the specific problem–forgetting about the date–that got to you, but rather the underlying feeling of frustration and disappointment that had built inside of you for the past month. Tonight was just the final blow that tipped you over the edge.  
Despite your irritating behavior and petty bickering, Joe was really turned on right now. Something about seeing that fire in your eyes, hearing that fire in your voice just got him going. You were taking charge, and he loved that even if he was pissed that you were arguing with him about something that didn’t need to be this big of a deal. You were putting him in his place and he liked that about you. He liked that you weren’t afraid to call him out on his bullshit. 
His eyes traced a slow, calculated path from your legs, to the graceful curves of your body, to the gentle contours of your breasts, then up to the curve of your neck, before finally meeting your captivatingly beautiful face. He couldn't resist the temptation to admire your compelling appearance, making it even more challenging for him to focus on the petty argument you were having. He felt bad that you got all dressed up for a date that wasn’t happening, but he did enjoy seeing your precious cheeks turn red out of anger, seeing your body tense up in a way that was practically begging for him to relieve it. 
He licked his plump lips as his eyes flashed to a darker shade of blue before saying, "Then why do you like me so much?". 
Your breath caught in your throat as you were trapped by the intense gaze in his eyes. Those dangerous, smoldering, bedroom eyes always seemed to have an irresistible effect on you. The words that followed, said in a tone that ignited a wildfire within you, made you feel an almost overwhelming urge to drop to your knees in front of him. “No, No, No. I’m mad at him. It doesn’t matter how much I would love for him to take away my ability to walk right now. Keep it together,” you thought to yourself, feeling butterflies flutter through your stomach. 
You remained quiet and continued to stare at him, watching him raise his eyebrows in the brattiest way possible as a result of how he easily silenced your bitching and moaning and because of how you had absolutely no response for him. 
“What’s wrong?” he asked as he leaned over and whispered in your ear, his husky voice sending shivers down your spine. “Cat got your tongue?”. 
“I’m not playing this game with you right now,” you rolled your eyes and snapped, starting to back up and walk away before you felt his warm hand wrap around your wrist and pull you right back to him.
A playful smirk danced across his lips as he pulled you into his embrace, immediately planting a trail of soft, teasing kisses along your neck, successfully redirecting your attention.
“Joe,” you whispered, trying to get out of his hold but struggling because of how he was holding you so tightly and pressing kisses all along your neck—your favorite spot to be kissed. “Oh fuck,” you lightly whimpered, feeling him nip and bite at your skin as he wrapped his hand around your neck and gently squeezed it. 
“Hm? Why do you like me so much then?” he mumbled as he dropped wet kisses up to your ear. “If I’m such a horrible boyfriend, why don’t you just leave?”.
“Fuck, Joe,” you accidentally moaned, feeling him start to suck on your favorite spot which made a pang of arousal shoot up your spine.  “So much for trying to keep it together,” you thought to yourself. “This has to be a massive ego boost for him,”. 
It definitely was. He took pride in knowing that he could so easily make you forget about your anger towards him by simply doing what he did best, skillfully and attentively worshiping every inch of your body.
“Hm,” he laughed against you. “I guess that’s why you don’t leave,” 
“You’re being a brat,” you said a few seconds later as you threaded your fingers through his frosted tips, pushing his head closer to your neck. Your actions are a complete juxtaposition to the words that came from your mouth. You were mad at him, but you weren’t acting like it. The sounds leaving your lips, your needy touch, it was all the complete opposite of what you were saying.
“No, you’re being a brat,” he said as he moved out of your neck and looked into your firey eyes. 
He had some nerve to be calling you a brat right now. You weren’t the one that had been ignoring him tonight or the one that had been brushing him off all month. “Go fuck yourself, Joe,” you spat out, the bitterness evident in your words, but it seemed to have little effect on him.
“How about you fuck me instead?” he boldly said while giving you the same tempting, inviting eyebrow raise again. 
“If he looks at me like that again, I swear to god I’m going to end up pregnant. Fuck. Why does he have to look at me like that when I’m trying to be mad at him,” you thought to yourself. Gradually, the intense anger, sadness, and constant irritation towards him turned into strong feelings of fierce desire, urgent need, and passionate emotion.
As you stood face to face, a noticeable tension filled the air, the heat rising as if a fire had been torched between you. His passionate gaze reached into you, sending jolts of electricity through the space. It felt as though he was silently expressing that he had the power to make you forget everything, if only you would allow him to.
And god you wanted him to. 
You quickly reduced the space between you both and smashed your lips against his, his hands dropping down to your waist and holding you tightly as a smirk rose on his lips. “Told you. This is why you don’t leave,” he whispered in between the messy kiss as you wrapped your arms around his neck and brought him in closer, completely melting under his fervent touch. 
“Shut up,” you smirked as you trailed kisses along his jaw before he pulled your lips back to his, both of your bodies calling each other’s names as you got lost in each other. 
He moves his big hands down to your ass, giving each cheek a gentle squeeze before whispering, “Jump,” in between the kiss. You do as he says, jumping and wrapping your legs around his middle as he holds you tightly, walking towards the stairs and taking you straight to the bedroom, all without breaking the restless kiss.
A few minutes later, you’re both naked and lying on the bed as Joe spends a bit more time peppering kisses along your neck, your neediness getting more and more vocal as he refuses to do the thing you actually need him to do. 
“Joe, please,” you whimpered as you felt his nose brush against your jaw while he sucked on a spot on your neck, your body squirming under his large frame.
“You can’t be mad at me like that and expect me to give you what you want so easily,” he smirks after he moves from your neck and looks into your eyes with mischievous intent. 
“Fuck you,” you scoffed while tilting your head to the side and refusing to look at him.
“Oh you will, all in due time, baby,” he whispered in your ear, then gently lifted you up in a tender embrace and sat down on the edge of the bed.
Straight across from the mirror. 
“What’re you doing?” you ask him as he sets you in his lap, both of you facing the mirror.
“You see that, Y/N?” he asks as he points to you in the mirror. “That’s you,” he adds as he continues to look up and starts to press wet kisses around your shoulder. His hand snakes around your waist, rubbing your belly with his long fingers as they start to navigate down to your thigh. 
“I know,” you sigh, tilting your head to the side as his kisses get closer to your neck.
“You’re not invisible, baby,” he says as he plants kisses in a path up to your ear as his fingers move down to your core aching core. “You’re right here,” he whispers, a moan escaping your lips as you feel his fingers slide against your wet heat. 
“Joe,” you whimper tipping your head back and closing your eyes, the feeling of his hot body underneath you combined with the feeling of his long fingers at the place where you need him the most becoming too much for you.
“I see you, Y/N,” he whispers in your ear, the tip of his cold nose pressed against it. “I always see you, I always hear you. You’re not invisible,” he says before pressing a kiss to the corner of your ear, then pressing his fingers against your sensitive clit. 
“Ah, Joe,” you moaned, feeling a jolt of pleasure rip through your body. Before you can move your head back forward to say something, you feel his fingers dip inside your core with no warning, earning another sound of pleasure from your lips. “Fuck,” you moaned as you practically melted into his embrace even more. 
His fingers begin to pump in and out of your core, more soft groans and whimpers falling from your lips as he drops slow, hot kisses around your face. “Fuck, you’re so tight,” he rasps as he drops his head down to your shoulder again, spending more time cherishing that part of your body. 
The sensation of his skillful fingers stretching you out and filling you makes you want to forget about everything that happened. Joe always had the ability to make you forget your worries and tensions in an instant, but this might have been a new record. 
“Joe, please…I..,” you whimper, grinding your hips against his as your body begs for more.
"Hmm, it's not that easy, baby," he says with a smirk, his voice oozing with cockiness. You can sense the power he holds over you, and it's clear that he finds it entertaining. He is fully aware of the effect he has on you and revels in it. You hated that he could easily get you like this, but you loved it so fucking much. 
His fingers continue to thrust in and out of your core, his touch becoming hotter by the second as you feel yourself inch closer to your release. “You don’t sound like you’re mad at me,” he said as he used his other hand to push your head forward so that you were looking in the mirror again. 
“Fuck,” you moaned when you saw his captivating dark blue eyes at the same time as you felt his fingers hit the spot inside of you. “I…I’m so…mad at you,” you struggled to get out, a whimper squeezing in between your words. 
“Sure,” he chuckled as he rested his chin on your shoulder, increasing the pace of his fingers.
You watched as his fingers disappeared in and out of your dripping heat, faint sounds of your wetness filling the room as you slowly moved your eyes back up to meet his. The look he had told you a number of things; he was horny as hell (just like you), he was enjoying seeing you struggle like this, and he was genuinely sorry about everything. 
The apologetic twinkle in his eyes produced a profound and intense emotion within you, igniting a powerful and overwhelming feeling. He was fully aware of his mistake and this was his way of expressing it to you. “Joe,” you screamed as you felt the band in your stomach tighten, your body gently trembling above him as you felt overwhelming pleasure coursing through your veins. 
“Look at you, you’re right there, Y/N. Not hidden, not transparent, and certainly not fucking invisible. Especially not to me,” he whispered in your ear, his husky, raspy voice being the final thing you needed to tip right over the edge.
You feel an intense, deep, and warm feeling pool in your belly, you were so so so painfully close. But just to your surprise, Joe suddenly pulls his fingers out of your core, earning a dissatisfied shriek from your lips. “What the fuck, Joe,” you panted, your core pulsing at the tension that was still there, the tension you thought he’d release for you.  
“Told you,” he smirked as he looked into your eyes through the mirror. “Not easy,”, a soft kiss landing on your shoulder before you feel yourself being lifted up again, turned around, and pushed down to the bed a little roughly. 
“Go. Fuck. Yourself.” you groaned at him a few seconds later, your eyes having that fire in them that he so desperately loved. 
“That’s your job, baby,” he winked as he kneeled down on the bed, hovering over you. “But, I’ll be nice for a little bit and help you out,”. 
You’re about to open your mouth to say something, but before you can, he smashes his lips against yours and rests the head of his hard cock at the entrance of your core. “You want me to give you attention? Here you go,” he mumbles a few seconds later with a cocky grin, and then you feel him push into you with a roughness that drove you wild.
“Ah, Joe,” a guttural moan escaping your lips as you scrunch your nose, your legs instinctively wrapping around him. He was wasting no time with you, and you loved that. 
A jolt of pleasure rips through your body again as he starts to move inside of you, his movements so thorough and intense but rough at the same time. His hand firmly grasps your waist, communicating a sense of possession and intimacy, making it clear to you that you belong entirely to him. 
His body was telling you that you weren’t losing him, that you could never lose him. You could never lose him because he would never let you, he’d never let go of you. 
“Fuck, Y/N,” he moaned as he felt your hands travel to his hair, gently tugging on the strands as you rested your lips on his neck. He begins to snap his hips against yours hard, every thrust sending you further back into the bed and making you forget about everything that ever bothered you in your entire life. 
“Joe…fuck, I’m…,” you panted. “Fuck,” you trailed off.
“I know, baby. I know,” he smiled.
He continues to thrust into you and sets a pace that makes you feel like you’re practically flying through the clouds. It feels euphoric the way he knows exactly how to send your body to its pleasure, almost other-worldly. He was just so good at it. 
The way he was worshipping your body, basically fucking the anger out of you was something your brain couldn’t comprehend. He was the only person who was capable of doing this to you, getting you so frustrated, hot, and bothered, and then having you completely and utterly raw the next second–emotionally and physically. 
Joe was aware that your anger towards him and his recent behavior stemmed from genuine pain. He deeply regretted causing you this pain and slapped himself mentally, repeatedly, for making you feel invisible, even for a second. You were the center of his galaxy, and he needed you to know that you still were and nothing had changed. 
He moves his lips back to yours, capturing them in an intimate kiss that stifles your moans. The delicious feeling of his cock filling you up and his lips against yours is all you could have ever wanted. The way he was moving against you was creating a haze in your brain, almost like a lavender haze. 
The haze surrounded you, signaling that you were immersed in a love that consumed every part of you. 
Joe consumed every part of you. He was the lavender haze, and you wanted to stay in that haze for as long as humanly possible. 
Even though you were mad at him, you couldn’t stay mad at him. He loved you and you knew that, and now he was showing you that he did. This was his way of reassuring you that he was right here with you. 
“Baby,” he moaned, feeling himself get lost in the pleasure you were bringing him. “You feel so fucking good,” he groaned. 
“Joe, my god,” you whimpered, feeling your already built-up release getting stronger again. “I’m so close,” you whined, feeling him somehow quicken his pace. You looked down at him, watching how he roughly pounded into your wet heat and how his muscular body was glowing in the soft light of your bedroom. 
“Cum for me, baby. I know you’re there,” he moaned in your ear before dropping his head to your neck. 
“Ah,” you whimper, feeling your body start to tremble again, you were just seconds away from letting go. 
One particular hard, well-placed thrust later, you were screaming his name as you pushed your head back into the pillow to brace yourself for your orgasm. You felt like a dam had just burst, and the pressure built against it was finally free. Wave after wave of pleasure rips through your body as Joe keeps hammering into you and each time you feel your high come down, it shoots right back up because of his movements. The feeling of your walls wrapping around him, squeezing and hugging his cock made him smile, almost as much as the sound of his name leaving your lips like a sacred chant. 
“Joe,” you whispered, feeling yourself finally come down from your peak. You looked down and saw that he was still moving inside of you, trying to reach his own peak. “Joe,” you said again as you threaded your hands into his hair and lifted his head, “Flip us,”. 
He looked at your glossed-over eyes with his tired ones, a dirty smirk forming on his lips at the idea of what you were asking him to do. “Okay,” he winked, wrapping his big hands around your torso and easily flipping you over all in one go. Despite how tired he was physically, he could never be too tired for you.
“He’s so fucking strong. Fucking hell,” you thought to yourself as you straddled his waist, taking in his tousled golden curls, his thick muscular chest which was coated with a thin layer of sweat, and then his large cock–which was practically calling for you. 
You grabbed his erection, guiding the tip between your drenched folds as you saw his face contort in pleasure and a hiss leaving his lips–he was close. You lifted your hips from his and sat up on your knees before lining up his cock with your core and sinking straight down onto it.  “Oh, fuck,” he moaned as he closed his eyes, his hands landing right on your ass with a light ‘slap’. 
You leaned forward and placed your hands on his pecs, sliding up and down his cock at the same pace he was pounding into you. “Yeah,” you whispered as you felt yourself feel a shock of pleasure coarse through your vein, just as Joe felt coursing inside of him. 
“Y/N, baby,” he groaned, “You feel so good, fuck,” he said while digging his head back into the pillow, having the time of his life watching you take over and ride him into oblivion. 
“I know,” you said to him with a cocky grin which made him raise his eyebrows again, the same way he did earlier. 
It was that same bratty, sexy, that made you think ‘get me pregnant right the fuck now’ eyebrow raise. 
“Fuck,” you moaned after you saw him raise his eyebrows and his cock hit that spot inside of you. 
“That’s my girl,” he grinned, feeling his ego shoot up because even though you were in ‘control’, he was still, actually in control. Especially over you, and it was so obvious. 
You continued to slide up and down his length, occasionally moving back and forth as his moans got louder and his grip on you got tighter. His eyes were fixated on your breasts that were bouncing up and down right in his view, his hands were stuck to your ass and were kneading your plush skin, and his hips were starting to thrust up into you. 
“I’m close, fuck,” he moaned as he felt your walls tighten around him–you were close too, again. 
“O- oh, fuck,” you whimpered while falling forward, your chest pressed against his. “Joe, you’re so fucking…,” you trailed off as a moan interrupted your sentence. “I’m gonna cum,” you whispered against his swollen, plump lips.
“Y- yeah, me too,” he panted, snapping his hips into yours harder. A few seconds later, your bodies moved against each other in perfect harmony for the final time as both of your releases hit at the same time, both of you feeling like your breaths had just been taken away by the intensity of your orgasms. 
“Joe,” you screamed, feeling your high hit you again like a ton of bricks, stars filling your eyes as your second release soaked your lower halves as you felt Joe’s cock twitch inside of you.  
“Fuck, Y/N…oh my god,” he rasped as he shot hot spurts of cum inside your wet, hot cunt, slowly thrusting whatever came out back into your core. His hands were gripping your hips now, so incredibly tightly that you were sure they would leave a small bruise. You looked down and saw how his nose was scrunched up, how his bottom lip was stuck between his teeth, and how his eyes were filled with love, regret, and admiration towards you. 
A couple of minutes later, you were both lying next to each other, trying to catch your breath and make sense of everything that happened in the past hour or so. Joe turned his head to the side to look at you, taking note of how you were biting away at your bottom lip–something you did when you were anxious.
You were in fact anxious. Your argument was bad, and whatever happened on this bed was amazing, but where did it actually get you? Yeah, you were much calmer and in your senses (kind of?) for the most part, but you had hardly talked about the reason you two even got to this point. 
Joe, with a mix of feelings, let out a deep, heartfelt sigh. He gently put his arm around your bare shoulder, pulling you close to his warm chest. Amid your overwhelming confusion, he became your safe haven even though he was the reason you were confused in the first place.
You felt the gentle touch of his lips as he pressed a tender kiss to your forehead. He then rested his mouth and nose against it, inhaling your natural fragrance. This simple act brought him a unique sense of comfort that no one else, not even his friends, could provide. It was this deep connection that made him realize the need to apologize to you. You were right, you were always right.
“Baby?” he asked you, causing you to look up at him with your tired eyes.
“Y- yeah?” you rasped, your voice scratchy from the activities you were partaking in just a few minutes ago. 
“I’m so, and I mean so fucking sorry for what I did,” he sighed. “I really didn’t mean to make you feel invisible or ignored this past month, you don’t deserve that. I’m sorry that I haven’t been giving you the attention you deserve lately, especially because you do so much for me, more than anyone ever has or ever will,” he sniffled, his eyes welling with tears. 
“Joe,” you pouted, moving your hand to cup his soft cheek and rubbing your thumb under his eye, seeing how glossy his eyes got all of a sudden. “It’s okay, I promise,”.
“It’s not, Y/N,” he said with another gentle kiss to your forehead. “I told you that you were the center of my galaxy, and you are. I hate that I made you feel like you weren’t anymore, that’s so fucked up. I should’ve talked to you about all of this and shouldn’t have expected you to say something first. I was the one that needed to get myself straight and I’m so sorry that I let things get to this point,”.
You felt his hand moving in gentle, soothing circles on your back, providing a comforting and secure touch. In his arms, your worries and tensions seemed to melt away in two distinct ways: the intimacy you shared in the bedroom, and the reassuring feeling of his current actions.
“I just felt like I was losing you,” you admitted. “I was scared that we were drifting apart and I just-,”.
“No,” he interrupted. “You’re not losing me, baby. You’re never going to lose me,” he softly said as he moved his hands into your hair. “I’m not gonna let that happen, not now and not in 15 years when we’re middle-aged and have two kids running around and are arguing about who has to drive the kids to school the next morning,” he smiled.
A soft chuckle left your lips as you imagined what he was saying, an image of your promising future with Joe filled your mind–and it was oh-so sweet. “Obviously you. I need beauty sleep,” you chuckled. 
“Noted,” he smiled as he pulled you closer to him as if you weren’t already stuck to him like glue. He opened his mouth to say something again, and the tone of his voice knew that what he was about to say could easily make you cry,  “I don't think I could find the right words to describe the depth of my love for you. What I feel for you overpowers any other emotion I've ever experienced. It's as if my soul has finally found its missing piece in you. I will choose you, again and again, without hesitation. No one else can make me feel the way you do. You mean everything to me. When I look at you, I see my life partner, my best friend, my everything. You have the unique ability to improve every aspect of my life–every laugh becomes brighter, and every tough day feels more manageable because you're there for me. You have given me a type of love that I never thought possible, and I'll forever treasure the way you've positively impacted my life. My love for you is something I'll wholeheartedly protect because no one else will ever have my heart the way you do. From the moment we met, I felt something unique about you. I've never loved anyone the way I love you, and I know I never will. You're my heart, my soul, and the person I want to spend the rest of my life with. No one else will ever come close to producing the feelings I have for you, and I'll always do everything in my power to ensure you feel as cherished and adored as you deserve.” he said while playing with your messy hair. 
You felt tears falling from your eyes after he finished talking, you didn’t even realize when you started crying, but you were. “Wait, I didn’t mean to make you cry,” he softly said as he leaned down and cleaned up your tears by placing kisses on each droplet. “I’m sorry, baby,” he said, his softness so adorable and genuine. 
“It’s okay, Joey,” you grinned, a few sniffles coming from your nose. “I’m crying because of how much I love you. What you said…that means a lot,”. 
“I mean it, Y/N. I’m genuinely so sorry for tonight, for this past month, for all of it. You are always number 1 for me and I need to show you that more from now on. I don’t deserve you at all, but I have you, and I won’t overlook something as valuable as you or not take advantage of the fact that you, this amazingly sweet, sexy, empathetic, down-to-earth, incredibly genuine, kindhearted, funny & sometimes slightly boring…” he started to say before you interrupted him.
“Ouch,” you giggled as you patted his chest, earning a soft chuckle from him.  
“...boring but unpredictable, loving, insanely beautiful, and charismatic girl has my heart in her hands,” he finished saying. “I love you, Y/N. I need to do better for you, and from this moment on I will. You deserve to be loved with 150% effort and I’m going to make sure you do. The guys can wait. I’ve spent enough time with them for them to go a couple of weeks, even months without seeing me. It’s you and me now and forever,” he said to you, his soft, loving eyes acting as a mirror to his soul–which showed his genuine and raw intentions and were exactly as he was describing to you. 
“I love you, Joe,” you smiled as you felt him brush his lips against your lips before planting a deep, passionate kiss to them. 
“Time to get things back on track,” he said a few seconds later, sitting up on the bed and bringing you with him. “It’s too late for our dinner reservation but I’m going to get it shifted to tomorrow. Tonight we’re going to the banks for some stargazing and a late-night picnic. We can pick up some pizza and ice cream from that place by the stadium on our way,” he nodded, talking you through the plan as if he had thought about this deeply, but he didn’t. He was coming up with all this on the fly. “Then tomorrow morning after we wake up, we can go on a little hike in that part by my parent’s house in Athens. It’ll be a drive but we can hike around there since it’s so pretty this time of the year and see my parents, maybe even get lunch with them at our favorite cafe over there before heading back home for dinner tomorrow night. On Sunday, it’s a full lazy day inside. We’re going to stay in our pajamas all day, do a Twilight movie marathon because I remember you saying you want me to watch them with you, order food to the house for lunch and dinner, maybe even bake some cookies or something, and then spend the rest of the day in bed. Preferably with no clothes,” he grinned. 
You were left speechless as you looked at him, impressed by how effortlessly he had drafted these plans without considering his own weekend schedule. The sight of him thinking on the spot filled you with affection, and your heart swelled with a mix of emotions. 
You leap forward and wrap your arms around his neck as you smother his face with gentle kisses, “I loveeeeee youuuuuuuuu,” you giggle, feeling him wrap his arms around your waist and hearing his soft chuckles in your ear. 
“I love you too, baby. You’re the shining force at the center of my galaxy, the light that everything else revolves around. Like the planets drawn to their sun, my life is pulled by your existence, and I know that for us to thrive, our orbit needs to be steady. Every moment with you is a delicate balance of love, trust, and effort–each one keeping us aligned, making sure our world doesn’t drift apart. I’ll protect that balance, making sure that no matter what forces try to interfere, we stay on track, always revolving around the core of what we’ve built together," he says to you, his heartfelt words, his embrace, the genuine look in his eyes all making you fall deeper in love with him.
"This is why I like you so much," you grin as you meet his baby blues, answering his question from earlier.
"What do you mean?" he asks you, licking his lips as he uses his hand to move his hair back.
"I like you because you're the most thoughtful, raw, incredibly well-spoken, smartest, nerdiest, most adorable and manly, genuine person I've ever met in my entire existence. You make me mad sometimes, but you also know exactly how to fix what you did and make everything even better than it was before. You're always making an effort to fix things. Yeah, you can be a dick, asshole, and oblivious idiot sometimes...,".
"Hey!" he gasps, acting like he was offended over what you said.
"But you're my obvious idiot and I love you for everything you are. You love me, like really love me and I know that and you never fail to make me know that. Also because you're like super sexy and I can't get enough of you and that damn eyebrow raise," you giggled.
"Oh, you like that?" he asked, giving you that eyebrow raise again.
"Do that again and we're staying in this bed the rest of the night," you smiled at him and said. "I might even end up pregnant by the end of it,".
Joe was stunned at your words, "Damn, so you really like that," he slowly nodded with a smirk.
"Really may be an understatement. Just know that you don't want to be inside my brain whenever you do that eyebrow raise," you winked. "I don't think we have enough anti-horny spray to get rid of the thoughts in my head,".
"Being perpetually horny is good for the soul, babe. Embrace it," Joe smiled as he leaned in and slowly kissed you in a way that made your toes curl and your body light on fire.
He fell back down against the pillows and brought you down with him. "Joe," you said in between the kiss, "We have to go," you smiled.
"Another round won't hurt," he said while giving you the eyebrow raise again, now knowing what it did to you.
You rolled your eyes, "Fuck, you're going to use that every damn time from now on, aren't you?".
"Maaaybe," he grinned as he brought you back down to his soft lips.
–The End–
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emmabirb8 · 10 hours
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I've been thinking about this for days now and man, Stanley Pines had a raw fucking deal.
He was doomed for a life of turmoil from the start. Not only did he suffer emotional (and implied physical) abuse from his father from childhood, he was kicked out of his own home at 17 for a legitimate mistake that he never intended to affect his brother's future. He struggled on the streets for ten years feeling like he'd lost his best friend when he and Ford stopped talking during that time, AND THEN received a metaphorical slap in the face when he found out that Ford did not in fact call him out to Gravity Falls to reconcile -- he only wanted a way to protect his research.
THEN, after rightfully getting his feelings hurt and reacting in anger to Ford making clear what his intentions really were, he lost his brother, the one person he'd felt closest to throughout his life, through the portal. He was left with only a third of the required information to reactivate the portal just for the chance to get Ford back -- it was never guaranteed that Ford would even be alive, let alone be able to be located and returned to his home dimension.
But Stanley fucking Pines is no quitter. He stayed focused and worked his ass off learning concepts he had absolutely no education or experience in, all the while blaming himself and hating himself and pushing through the worst kind of heartache every goddamn day for 30 years for that chance. (And honestly, God bless Mabel for betting it all on her Grunkle and allowing him that chance when the time finally came.) And it fucking worked. Just like that, he got his brother back. All that hard work and grief was worth it.
And then he was greeted with an angry outburst and a punch to the face.
This man went through hell and back for his brother, and he was met with a knee-jerk reaction and confirmation that Stanford still seemingly resented him for his past mistakes. Like, I understand Ford's perspective and where he was coming from at the time, but damn it, Stan did NOT deserve that.
He didn't end up getting a proper hug from his brother either until after Bill had been defeated, and by that time, he didn't even know who Stanford was because, once again, he sacrificed everything to save his family. (He was under the impression that his memories would be lost forever and STILL chose to do it).
I am positively beside myself over this man. And this doesn't even touch on the things he did for people outside his family. (Like, he could have easily holed himself up in the shack alone during Weirdmaggedon, but instead, he took in anyone who needed shelter, offered his food supply, and provided a safe place, I'M SORRY BUT FORD WOULD NEVERRRR)
Stanley Pines deserved better. Stanley Pines deserves the whole entire WORLD. He has the biggest heart out of ANYONE and Ford is damn lucky to have him as his brother.
STANLEY PINES MY BELOVED AAAAOOOOOUUUUGGHHHHH
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fira211 · 2 years
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I don't know how it would work, I don't know where the idea came from. But I'm rereading the Abhorsen series and I had a rare pair thought:
Disreputable Dog/Mogget enemies to friends to lovers (though almost certainly ace rep or something mystic like Good Omens angel/demon feelings sex and not bodily sex [not that GO body sex fic isn't also delightful but I digress])
Also, Good Omens/Old Kingdom crossover in general but I would love for Aziraphele and Mogget to be friends (library cat) and Crowley and the Dog to be friends (chaos twins)
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auragasmics · 3 months
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HIS PATIENCE IS MY VIRTUE!
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∞ ₒ ˚ ° 𐐪𐑂 ♡ 𐐪𐑂 ° ˚ ₒ synopsis! with work piling up and stress reaching its boiling point, Nanami needs a break. And when his pretty assistant suggests a trip up to Kyoto for the hot springs, he’s taking the chance to spoil you, love you, and turn his 3-year spout of patience into your virtue!
∞ ₒ ˚ ° 𐐪𐑂 ♡ 𐐪𐑂 ° ˚ ₒ pairings! assistant!fem!reader x sex therapist!nanami kento
∞ ₒ ˚ ° 𐐪𐑂 ♡ 𐐪𐑂 ° ˚ ₒ cw! 17.3k, pwp, age gap (reader is 26, nanami is 28), use of petnames, use of alcohol, splashes of fluff, (if you squint), solo play (male), voice kink, features a conversation with gojo satoru, cumshot,, handjob, oral(f.receiving), hand job, p in v, unprotected, sensation play(heavy), biting, doggystyle, prone bone, cowgirl, slow sex, needy!nanami, Nanami has a sir kink, implied aftercare
∞ ₒ ˚ ° 𐐪𐑂 ♡ 𐐪𐑂 ° ˚ ₒ xoxo, chris! yessss it’s done! 17.3k of filth and it’s all dedicated to my man! thanks to my lovely friend and beta-reader @n3vr-f0und ! this could not have been possible without you! this goes out to all the nanami girlies, i love our man!
tags: @lalunanymph @4-leafed
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He’s asleep again.
Through the slivered crack of his office, your eyes dwell upon Nanami’s slumbering form, casted beneath the glowing embers of daylight. He relied on his folded arms for a makeshift pillow, uncaring of the tousled golden strands of hair that lay waste about the top of the waxy oak desk. 
He’s definitely sleeping—and has been for a while.
You couldn’t help but let out a sigh, the breath fueled by concern. You could’ve warned him every morning at the start of the workday and every night right before rush hour began, during rush hour, but he never listened.  
For the three years you’ve been under his employment, there was always a single trend that never seems to hint at change: Nanami never knows what exhaustion is until he’s caught in its grasp with heavy eyelids and a slack jaw of yawns. 
And there’s one extra detail you know about Nanami is that he hates working overtime—but does it anyway. 
Originally when you first joined his side, you thought the job of a sex therapist was an easier task than most; he’d have an easy job; listening and finding a solution for others. After just one day of work with him, such a brazen thought was put to rest. Since that day, you’ve rewritten a new script in your mind, one free of judgment and assumption, because in turn, the job of a sex therapist was not easy. 
And for a sex therapist like Nanami who lacked compassion for himself, empathy and compassion for his clients claimed all his time. His days were spent in appointments and his nights were spent in books, nose-deep in pages of delegated knowledge searching for a solution. That was the role Nanami took on, the role of being a compassionate problem solver.
Compassion comes at a price, and his compassion costs him every ounce of his livelihood. Taking on a role that would reap no inherent benefits meant Nanami was always giving from an empty cup, using his blood, sweat, and tears to refill every drop he’d given away. 
He rebukes his efforts, truly. Yet, such innate dislike had never once interfered with his determination. 
It’s written all over his face once he’s done with a meeting, it’s draining work. It drains him of all his physical, emotional, and psychological energy, but he still wears a smile as a mask in time for the next session. 
If eyes can tell a story, then Nanami’s oak brown hues scream out a soliloquy that falls on deaf ears. Inside bleeds out and his story tells of a man who wishes to give up his life for the mundane. To spend his days basking beneath the sun, using the purest white sands as a mattress for his dream life.
Such a shame that the man’s only wish has yet come to pass.
For now, he’s come to terms with it, filling the pit of ever-growing resentment with work. 
It’s exactly why he’d be in and out of meetings with clients, spending late nights on the phone. Some days you even come into work to find him asleep in his office with papers scattered about his desk. 
His philosophy was simple, if he couldn’t enjoy the deepest desire to the fullest, the least he could do was help those struggling with the same reality. 
But as you watch him from the sidelines, a question plaques your mind: when will it end?
It’s redundant, but the question puzzles you every day. It rules over your mind even now as you scan over his sleeping figure. Standing along the door’s trim, you couldn’t help but admire how precious Nanami appears under such temperate conditions. 
Quiet steps deliver you just inches from him, granting you to play the role of a jury to a trial of a self-committed crime. 
Yet, the criminal in question glows beneath the ebbing light, his skin drinking in the rich hues of pink, gold, orange, and purple. His uniform binds him to his crime, his white sleeves rolled up to his elbows and his black slacks melding within his leather seat. 
Though he committed a crime, there’s one detail that turns this prisoner into a charmer; and that’s the way he wears sleeps. The heft of his slumber can be narrowed to a point, down to his pursed lips, such pink velvety plush begging for a kiss of life.
Pity stains your heart like ink to a scroll, and it’s bleeding through in a passing heat. No fiber in your being could allow you to leave him alone, not when nothing but four lonesome walls and pestering neighbors await you.  
Pity carries a weight over its residents, and you were no different. It’s because of how heavy pity is that your hand breaks away from your side, reaching out to curl a loose lock of blonde strands around your finger. Even his hair’s soft, lacing around your skin like the finest silk. Now that you've captured a clearer picture of him, you can’t help softening your gaze over Nanami.
Was Nanami always this attractive? Even in his sleep, he possesses skills to lure you into a trance. Such smooth fair skin, a sculpted jaw clenched in sleep, his cheekbones perched high, and the dark rings beneath his eyes add a shameful appeal to him.
Trailing along his form, you’re stuck at how the burly swell of his arms tests his white dress shirt, the cotton fabric choking at the seams. His shirt just barely hides his broad shoulders, carrying the careful cuts of muscle that rise with every breath he takes. 
“If only you would share your stress with me, Nanami,” the words whispered out into the tepid air. 
Your hand falls from his distressed bed of hair, the back of your hand dusting past the fishnet stockings beneath your red cocktail dress. The time’s come to wake him up….and hope that he’s as docile as ever.
A deep breath takes you far, your hand resting along his shoulder. It’s rigid, thick muscles that refuse to conform to your touch. The lump in your throat bloats up and you ease his shoulder to rock beneath your hand.  
 “...Nanami…Nanami, sir…,” you coo, “You’ve gotta wake up. I’m sure this desk isn’t as comfy as your bed.”
A low grumble acts as a response, Nanami shuffling about his makeshift pillow. His hands hide beneath his cheek, his laxed palms curling up into loose fists as he struggles to sit up.
As a courtesy—or more so out of nervousness; you step away from him with your hands behind your back, allowing Nanami to grasp his hazy surroundings alone. 
“Wha…What happened?” He rasps lowly, his words served with sleep’s baritone curl.
“Um...Sir?”
“Huh? Oh, did I fall asleep here again? That’s the third time this–hold on…” Nanami trails off, his raspy voice breaking through the air.
He’s hazy and those clouded hazel hues trickle onto you as he shifts towards you, his black leather chair swiveling under him. 
“Oh…what’re you still doing here? It’s way past the end of your shift, Sweetheart.”
Nanami watches you bite at that delicate lip of yours, supple plush taking on the jagged impressions. That mindless tick melds into a blooming pout, a decoy for the words that toss his groggy mind off guard. 
“Nanami, sir, I can’t watch you do this to yourself anymore!” 
He’s dumbfounded, a rare state for him, but only you alone manage to pull Nanami into a place of confusion. A hand of his drifts to the back of his neck, itching at the sparse hairs of his undercut, trying to make sense of your outburst.
“And what exactly am I doing to myself?”
“This!” You point to his body, “This, in fact, is the third time this week you’ve slept in your office. And it’s been at least ten times this month! You’re tired, and you need a real break.”
Gawking is all Nanami can do. It comes at the price of a complete loss for words, but in some strange way, he’s intrigued by your outcry. Him needing a break? Of course, he needed a break, but he’s interested to hear what you perceive to be this “break”.
“A vacation is what you think I need?”
“I know a vacation is what you need…but I can’t force it on you,” you sigh, taking wandering steps that land you into the grand armchair sitting opposite to him.
With you seated before him, Nanami shudders beneath the stress of containing himself. 
Oh, he hates it when you get mad—but loves it all at the same time. It’s a parallel that consumes him, hating how anger sews along your precious features—while relishing it all the same. 
It’s the woe of taking every word you say seriously while admiring those plump lips bearing a firm purse and your finely plucked brows knit a harsh crease into your face.  
 And when you do get upset—whether it be at a client, the printer…or in rare cases, him. And when you get like this at him, he knows that a lecture can’t be too far off.
“Sir, you’ve got to take better care of yourself! You can hide it from the clients, but you can’t hide it from me. But…I think I have a solution!”
“Which is?” He contemplates with a brow quirked.
Resting his chin along the back of his knuckles, Nanami relies on the strength of his propped arm for support as he delves into your mind. 
He knows the expression he’s giving isn’t kind—dull eyes that reek of disinterest. And all the while, maybe it is disinterest because he’s all too aware of what he needs. But your intentions are pure, that much he knows. In the face of pure intentions, who was he to deny your presentation?
You drop your attention to Nanami’s desk, prompting him to follow suit. He studies your manicured finger carefully dragging along the wide calendar laid atop the waxy surface.
“This weekend from Friday to Sunday, you’ll be all free! I know you like to have at least one client a day, but I pushed some days around and managed to—”
“You were planning this…weren’t you?” Nanami hints sharply, his lungs prepping to bore a longing sigh.
To feign innocence, you shrug your shoulders. You hide your motives well, but the small smile around your eyes tells Nanami all he needs to know. 
“No comment, buuut, why not take advantage of this?” 
Out comes that sigh brewing in his chest. “All right…What do you recommend I do with all the magical free time? Pick up a hobby? Start a garden? Tell me, Darling.”
Nanami’s sights carry to your own, his eyes pivoting over your face deep in thought. Something about you working so hard on his behalf brings about a warmth to flutter in Nanami’s chest. As to how he’s been blessed with you is a mystery he thanks the heavens for every day. And you look so cut–
“Got it!” you snap, “Onsen. I think you need an onsen for the entire weekend. The hot water and minerals will do your body, mind, and spirit justice!”
Nanami tilts his head at the thought, “Hmm, the onsen? Like out in Kyoto?” 
“Mhm, I hear those are really nice!”
“Hm, okay then…”
Nanami swiftly dips into his back pocket for his wallet. He flips the thick bundle of leather open, pinching at his card with a single digit and his thumb. 
He places a matte black card in front of you, rattling off the steps to make your wish come true. “Go ahead and book the room and two tickets for the train tomorrow at nine, and—”
“Hold on, hold on! Are you inviting me to come along too?”
Nanami merely shrugs at your sweet naivete, “Naturally. I’m sure you’d want to come along too…unless I’m stepping over a boundary. I never asked if you had prior engagements or even a partner at home. But…if you could join me, I think the break would be good for you too.”
Your hands wave the infamous white flag of surrender, shooting down Nanami’s suggestions with a flustered chuckle, “Oh no no…just me at home! But um…yeah, I’ve never been to one. I’d love to come along. But for tomorrow…I’d have to start planning right away!”
“We could…do it together. I have my laptop right in my bag,” his shoulder nudging towards the side of his desk. “I know it’s last minute, so the least I could do is offer some help.”
Nanami struggles to hide the grin that teases his lips when you agree, taming his excitement with a guttural grunt of his throat. 
Three whole days with you, the pretty assistant he’s been plotting on since the day he hired you.
As rambles fall from your mouth, Nanami’s absorbed into thoughts of you, while supporting your thoughts with nods and gentle hums. He hasn’t been so outward with his growing affection towards you at all, that simply wasn’t his style. 
But has he tried?
Of course, by taking you out to high-class restaurants for lunch and dinner, buying you flowers every week (and blaming it on some client with a crush for you), he’s even found a way to secretly link your account to his so that not a dollar of your hard-earned money would enter the cruel economy. Why if Nanami could go as far as to pay your rent, he’d do it without any questions asked.
And now he has the chance to take you out of the city for three whole days?
Nanami wasn’t sparing a single penny, not when it came to booking that private villa with its own hot spring bath, the best seats on the bullet train, and even planning some excursions to explore Kyoto. 
“…Nanami…Sir?” 
The call of his name brings him back into the present and on your face wearing a giddy grin.
“Mm…so sorry, is everything alright?”
“Yup! We’re all set for this weekend!” you cheer, clapping your hands softly at the confirmation prompt on the laptop on the screen.
“Oh good! Well then, let’s break for tonight! Be at the station by eight-thirty, okay?” Nanami passing on a stern stare to you.
“I got it, but that’s so early!” 
“It’s a two-and-a-half-hour ride, we’ll be getting there right around lunch and with plenty of daylight to spare. Stop complaining and go home…I’ll see you tomorrow,” Nanami huffs out.
His eyes follow you as you lazily pull yourself out of the chair, your hands smoothing down the back of your dress. The steps you take are slow and saucy, leaving Nanami to bite down on his bottom lip. 
Such a tease and you weren’t doing it on purpose. You’re just yourself and that’s exactly what Nanami can’t get enough of.
You turn back to Nanami when you pull the door just enough to slip your body through, your lips curling into a fine smile.
“Have a good night…Sir. See you tomorrow!”
“Have a g-good…Have a good night!” Nanami rushes out, giving you a limp wave before the shutting door leaves him alone with his thoughts.
An exhausted sigh rips out from his chest as he leans back into his chair, his hand racing to palm his face. 
And in between the gaps of his thick fingers, Nanami’s eyes darted down to a familiar but embarrassing scene.
His cock twitching in his pants.
He couldn’t help it, hearing his name matched with the weighty title of sir sent his mind on a rampage. You calling him sir? And it just so happens to sound so melodic rolling off your tongue?
It already wasn’t normal for someone in his position to be head over heels for his assistant—but he was. It wasn’t normal for Nanami to give in to such silly whims—but he’s going to.
Before thinking it over, Nanami’s hand drops from his face and down to his lap, squeezing at the curious curve rising beneath the black fabric of his slacks.
“...maybe just one can’t hurt…right?”
A rhetorical question, he’s already tugging at the tiny zipper, pulling the slip of metal down its jagged path to its post. He switches over to fiddling with his pants button, yanking the thin button through its slit and tugging his pants down his legs with his briefs in tow. 
There’s a risk that some of those sinful moans will evade his resolve; it’s just his luck that his dress shirt’s objecting to the view of everything past his waist.  Yanking the shirt up towards his awaiting mouth, Nanami bites down on the white cotton as hard as he can.
He doesn’t hesitate to envelop his length in a fist, strumming up and down all eight inches of his pudgy tanned girth. It’s been a while but Nanami still knows what gets him going—a couple squeezes, focusing on his sweet spot, tracing that one swollen vein ruched along the heavy underside of his cock, all the turning cogs that bring him to ruin.
As he’s taking the time to swipe at the weeping bellhead, a thought pops into his head that he can’t ignore. 
He can’t help but wonder what would you think of his dick? A sinfully precarious thought, he knows, but that doesn’t mean he can’t think about it nonetheless. 
He’s no stranger to the concept either. Especially when he takes to the bars some evenings, his ears pick up all the talk of drunk girls gossiping about how “pretty” their boyfriends’ dicks are. It’s so vulgar then but now…he’s craving to hear your thoughts more than anything.
What would you have to say about his size, his length, the way his cock sits with a curve that defies gravity? Suddenly, he’s choreographing a scene in his head, picturing you on your knees, patiently waiting for him to rip down his briefs and expose himself to you. 
At the thought, he’s picking up a slow pace. His taut fist lazily drags up his shaft and down to the base, utilizing a deathly grip that sends shivers down his spine. 
Just for this special occasion, he pulls his shirt from his clenched teeth for a moment to curl over his thighs. Through the pucker of his lips, Nanami sends a thick spool of spit to dance over the flushed head of his cock, the soapy pool dribbling down his length. 
His hand meets the trail of spit gradually, his thumb back to swiping along his now glossy underside. 
“Oh fuck…” he hisses, writhing in his seat at the new sensation claiming his being. Just stroking himself was decent but stroking himself when he’s dripping like this makes for a new cadence to be found. 
Why, it’s so much better that he’s eagerly picking up the pace, his fist sent to swivel up and down his endlessly hardening cock, squeezing at the tip whenever he saw fit. 
His eyes risk exiting the scene, fluttering back with the mean strides he weaves. Just to his dismay, a flickering light pairs annoyingly well with the vibrations of a call cursed Nanami’s chance at relief.
He usually isn’t this careless, picking up the phone call without identifying the caller.
“Hello?” He drones into the microphone. 
And it’s just his luck that it’s you.
“Hi, Sir! I had a question…”
Sir. Three letters, a single syllable, and the key to Nanami’s lustful demise. If only you knew the filthy hold that ghastly word held over him.
Just by hearing your sweet voice utter such a word, lawless pangs laid waste to Nanami’s fisted cock in sinful bliss. Was this some form of karmic reward? To hear your voice right before indulging in himself had to be some prize.
He’s forced to bite down the groans in his throat and trade his cries for coherent words. “Wha…What’s wrong, Sweetheart? You just left the office.”
“Oh, I know!” He can hear the pout in your voice, those plump lips pushed out for everyone but him to see. “It’s just that I was thinking…nine is just so early! And our tickets are good for all day. Can weeee leave just a little later?”
Nanami wants to listen to your pleas, he truly does, but he has to deal with something new befalling him: his body’s blatant betrayal.
His hand’s moving on its own, choking the fat girth of his cock all the way up to the tip, viciously squeezing the pink crown into nasty pale hues. Even at a time when he’s meant to be serious, his body’s adamant on milking itself dry. But must he be so slow yet unforgiving to himself like this?
“…Sir? Hello? Did the call drop?”
“No! I’m still here…” Nanami’s sudden outburst breaks the silence.
He pins the phone between his ear and shoulder, relying on his two hands to ease the relentless pit boiling at his core.
He had to find some way to get that sinful title rolling off your tongue again. So what could be brought up to keep your voice purring?
“So…since my suggestion is too early, what do you have in mind…Honey?”
“Glad you asked, Sir!”
One. 
He’s pulling on his cock with a heavy drag, only for all his efforts to be spat out in glossy tears of precum. He’s making a mess of himself, the glassy rivulets trickling down his ghostly knuckles. He’s nowhere near the sacrums of nirvana but the display he’s forced to bear witness to hints at an early arrival. 
“Uh-huh, go on.” he’s mumbling between gritted teeth. He’s losing temperance over his breaths. 
“…and we’d still have plenty of time to explore the town, Sir.”
Two.
Now, Nanami’s getting the best of himself, purposely focusing on the head of his cock in short yet quick pumps. He’s extra keen on how sensitive he is too, pitting his thumb to curve right along the against his sweet spot.
He’s so close, shamefully closer than before. He knows that if he keeps on swiping at his underside like this, he’ll be binded to an explosive fate any minute. 
“I know you like to be punctual but please, Sir?”
Oh…now you’re begging him. That’s three.
The thick gush of white splatters all over Nanami’s heaving stomach, his chiseled abs glistening in a hot, opal tinge. 
Before he can even afford to echo the bliss ripping through his body, Nanami yanks the phone from his ear and presses the microphone against his chest to muffle any pathetic whimpers that slip him by. 
The poor man, fair skin licked by a familiar fleeting heat and flinching in his seat by the cold wash that follows. He can’t remember the last time he’s let go like that, but the splattered canvas he’s reduced himself to tells him exactly what intuition would scream at him. 
He’s just about ready to clean up but something feels…off. There’s just something he can’t put his finger on—
The phone call. 
He panics, rushing to press the phone to his ear.
What was the last time you said? Something about please si—
“H-Hey, hey…you don’t have to beg me. Do me a favor, ‘kay? Just text me what time you want to meet at the station and I’ll be there.”
“Okay! Well then…get home safe and I’ll see you tomorrow…sir.”
Four.
It’s a punch in the gut this time because while he thought he’s been milked dry, Nanami’s eyes shoot apart at a bewildering sight: He’s still cumming.
His twitching cock’s forcing out a timid stream of white that’s dripping down his black slacks and running off onto the floor beneath him. 
Nanami’s husky voice is washed in grief, the desire to cry out against the bliss of overstimulation dances on his tongue—but he has to send you off first.
With as mellow of a tone as he can rally, Nanami sends you his final thoughts.
“You too. Get home safe and see you tomorrow.”
The call ends and Nanami’s seething behind gritted teeth. 
“Fuuuck,” he cursed to himself, his soiled hand still gripped around his twitching length. He wants to move, clean himself up, and get home to prepare for tomorrow, but fatigue’s already batting behind his eyelids. 
Slouching back in his chair, Nanami finally allows his lungs to catch some air, his heaving chest stabilizing at last. 
He’s a mess, the chair’s a mess, and even the floor too, but he isn’t focused on such miniscule details that nothing a good cleaning couldn’t take care of. Fresh off his orgasm, Nanami’s back to thinking about you and the weekend ahead. 
The gears in his head are clicking and he’s thinking that maybe—just maybe, he’s earned the opportunity of a lifetime to do the one thing that’s been on his list for the last three years: to make you his girlfriend.
He can’t take it anymore, being in the office acting like he’s so standoffish when he truly wants nothing more than your presence. Your smile starts his day, your care for his well-being motivates him, and your kind words fill his heart in ways he can’t even describe.
He hasn’t regarded you as his assistant these past three years, more like his girlfriend who isn’t aware of his full-fledged commitment.
It’s so pathetic, he knows. But thanks to you, finally…Nanami’s goal was within reach. All he had to do was chase it. 
Nanami’s sentiments only grew during the night and into the next day: Friday, the day he’s set to journey off with you. 
∞ ₒ ˚ ° 𐐪𐑂 ♡ 𐐪𐑂 ° ˚ ₒ ∞ 𐐪𐑂 ♡ 𐐪𐑂 ∞ ₒ ˚ ° 𐐪𐑂 ♡ 𐐪𐑂 ° ˚ ₒ ∞
It’s been a blur since Nanami’s woke up—he’s been busy packing, cleaning his apartment, and standing in front of the mirror deciding which suit he should don for the day.
 As the clock struck two, bags gathered by the door and a plain black suit with a white button-down dresses his body. He’s forgoing a tie for the weekend too, a few undone buttons present the dips of his collarbone prepared to bear the day’s breeze. 
But there’s peril racing through Nanami’s mind, and has been since the previous night: he has no clue how to act or even go about courting you into being his girlfriend by the end of the hot springs trip. All he knows up to this point is subtlety—and subtlety is not an option in his arsenal. 
The field of romance is a realm he’s barely pillaged through except for a few flings that led to nothing. You’re too different for his typical approach. He needs his message to come out clearer than glass, and for those kinds of results—he’s turning to one…annoying person for advice.
As Nanami reaches into his pocket, he can taste regret staining his tongue. And as he’s clicking onto that damned contact, he’s cursing himself for even thinking of turning to this man for advice.
And when the line connects, he’s kissing his teeth at the sound of his nickname falling from the lips of one…Gojo Satoru.
“Nanamin! You rarely call me these days! I miss you y’know,” the smooth voice trumpets out into his ear. 
Huffing out the last bit of his pride, Nanami sighs into the phone, “Ah well…um, Gojo…I need some…help.”
“With?”
“A woman. My assistant, to be precise. We’re going out of town for the weekend and—”
“Nanami? Going on a trip? I must’ve died. And with a lady? I’m in an alternate universe now,” Gojo teases. “So, what do you need help with, I’m a little lost.”
Nanami drops himself on the edge of his sofa, the taupe leather dipping beneath his weight. He brings a hand to the back of his neck, rubbing at his tensed skin. 
“She’s my assistant but…Gojo…I really want her to be my girlfriend. I have for the past three years. But my hints are too subtle and this is my best chance to finally be honest with her. I just don’t want to mess up. We’re going out to Kyoto
“Three years? You’ve always been patient, but this is extreme, Nanami. And the hot springs…you planning on—”
“Stop it right there. Just…tell me what you’d do.”
Nanami stares at his phone as the line goes silent, waiting for Gojo to say something—anything, really. 
“Nanami, now I can’t help you too much, I’m not the relationship type. But just think about it like this, if you’ve had your eye on her for three years…and she’s been working with you for three years, obviously there’s something she likes about you too. This is so cliche and I’m cringing at the thought but…be your—”
“No.” Nanami immediately shuts down. 
“Yes, and let me explain. Don’t try to be some guy you’re not, women pick up on that too easily, especially since you guys are going out on this trip. Be yourself and when the time comes, tell her how you’ve felt. And no matter what happens, just be proud that you were honest with yourself, okay?”
“Yeah…that works.”
“Good!” Gojo cheers, “Now go have fun and bring some condoms! You never know what’s—”
“Goodbye, Gojo,” and just like that, Nanami’s thumb isn't hesitant to end the call with a click. 
“Just be myself…” he’s mulling over. While it’s sad to say that Nanami already knew that, he was hoping for something a little more out of Gojo. But himself is all he can be, then that’s exactly how he’ll act. 
Slotting his phone back into his pocket, Nanami catches a glimpse of the time from the face of his watch.
3:00 P.M.
He had just an hour to himself before sitting on a two-hour train with you. But before that reality could be realised, He had a few errands to knock off his list.
The next time Nanami checks his watch, he’s leaning against a white tiled column in Tokyo station. 
And the time is…3:45. 
Those that surround are others caught up in their own lives—teenagers dressed in uniform, businessmen in their suits chasing the next transfer, and families strolling out the exits; all the people and not a single one knew the nerves that ambush his calm mind. 
Not a single one knew of the havoc crashing through his body at the reality he’s set to enter. He did all he could to prepare, yet he can’t comprehend that he’s the last piece to the puzzle. Everything’s in line like dominoes, and all he had to do was strike the porcelain trail down.
And something about that, such ease, nothing about that sits right in Nanami’s mind. 
Until the winning move falls right into his unexpecting lap. 
“Oh! Nanami! Hi, sorry for making you wait! This station is just big, thankfully I just followed my gut and found you here,” the familiar voice rings in his ear.
He looks up to find your starry eyes already set on him from a few paces away. Nanami’s staring at you, hard. He’s never seen you in anything that wasn’t professional wear, that’s the excuse that plays in his mind over and over like a broken record. 
You, in that silk yellow blouse that grants so much cleavage thanks to its low-cut neck. And the pleated light gray skirt around your waist is just so short, just one mishap and it’s all over.
Amidst all his leering, Nanami almost allows himself to forget manners. He meets you just halfway, wearing a soft smirk as he reaches for your bag.
“Here, allow me.”
“Oh! Thank you so much, Sir—"
It’s that damned word again. The letters rolling off your tongue bring a haunting memory from yesterday back into Nanami’s mind. He clenches the leather strap of your carry-on ever so tightly, gradually collecting himself before speaking. 
“Hey Darling, you can drop the ‘sir’, okay? We’re on vacation after all. Nanami works just fine, or even…Kento works, if you want.”
He’s enlightened by the smile you put on your face, the peaks of your cheeks polished beneath the station’s fluorescent lights. 
“Oh, sorry about that! ‘m just so used to the honorifics. But…alright then, Nanami. Is my bag too heavy for you?”
“No, no, it’s really not heavy at all. But we should get to the platform, though,” Nanami tokens with his head towards the destined path. “Are you ready?”
A kind smile grew across your glistening lips as you leaned towards Nanami, your hands softly clapping with approval. “Lead the way then, I’m right here.”
And Nanami does just that. He spins right on the heel of his shoe and walks with occupied hands, a tepid stare of his path ahead, his mind swirling with thoughts of you, and you at his side. 
The station’s loud, loud with chatter, giggles, running feet, and warbling notifications on the intercom, and as all this goes on around him, Nanami can’t help but be absorbed into his own world. A world that included you. 
Every so often, he steals a glance at you, his wistful eye watching you marvel at the station’s lively atmosphere. But all he can think about in his world is you; you and your beauty. He’s enamored at your mindless antics, the way your lashes flutter with each blink, the way your lips twist up–he’s even stuck over. But looking at you wasn’t enough, not when there’s this wall between you two. 
It’s invisible to everyone but him. It’s one that he can look over, one that he can easily topple over with a sigh, but it’s one that he can’t fathom to crack without a proper plan.
The wall of silence—Nanami’s greatest ally turned enemy. 
He isn’t used to this: sharing his intimate time like this. If he’s not holed up in his office, he’s out on his own tending to errands or matters of business. His usual standoffish method stands no chance today if he aims to woo you.
So, he went to the first thing you both had in common for the moment: emotion. 
“So…” Nanami begins as he scours his mind for the words. “Are you…excited?” 
You extend a kind look to him, soft eyes that pair well with your smile. “Of course I am! I’ve never been to a hot spring before, but I’ve heard so much about them and how good they’re supposed to be. I can’t wait for that hot water to hit my skin! How about you, Nanami?” 
“Me?” He echoes with an arched brow. “Well…guess I’m excited too. Breaks are something I always want to take, but I never seem to act on them. The second I give it some thought, I’m already calculating missed opportunities and risks. I appreciate you pushing for this, Honey. Just make sure you have fun for me, okay?”
“For you?” Maybe you weren’t supposed to catch that slip-up, but being with Nanami like this was already fulfilling you beyond words. For him to be walking beside you, holding your luggage like it's nothing but a feather, it’s all too much for your mind to contain. 
Moving dates around to have the weekend available worked in your favor. Three whole days tucked up beside Nanami, waking up with him, exploring Kyoto together, and even bathing together clouds your imagination with sinful thoughts. 
He hides the full extent of his figure beneath suffocating suits, but you know all too well that Nanami’s physique is on par with the gods themselves. With his arms, back, and thighs banded with muscle, his developed chest taut with contour, and his big hands teeming with veins, your eyes were ready for it all. 
And if the weekend ends with you bent over to help relieve all the pent-up stress he talks about in sessions, it would all be for a promising cause.
“Aww, Nanami…then let’s have fun together. But if I–Oh look, here we are! And the train’s boarding too, should we board? Looks like we’ll have to look for seats too,” your voice carrying a dull sigh.
“It’s fine, I think I can see two seats right there,” Nanami directs with a tilt of his chin. 
He leads the way once more, urging you to board the train in front of him. The seats he took note of. You slip inside first, taking the window seat just as Nanami saw in his head.
Before he could join you, Nanami marks his spot with a small white plastic bag on his seat before loading the suitcases into the overhead bin and grabbing it again before sitting beside you.
Tugging the bag open, he reveals two sandwiches inside.  “Oh, I stopped by the bakery on my way here and grabbed sandwiches. I um…I noticed what you like on yours, so…here you are.”
Trying to still his trembling grip, Nanami carefully places the tightly bundled sandwich into your awaiting hands. 
“Aw, thank you so much! You really didn’t have to! I was just gonna wait until we got to Kyoto to eat!”
The smile that consumes your face is contagious, prompting Nanami to hide his own grin behind a clamped hand. 
“It’s a long ride and I have a feeling you might have missed breakfast, so…hope you like it, Sweetheart.”
Nanami’s hope of gawking at you is cut short when you catch his leering sights. 
The heat of embarrassment crackles beneath his skin, something he knows he can’t hide from you. 
Rather, he adjusts himself, pushing his glasses up against the bridge of his nose with an excuse fumbling out from his lips. 
“Sorry. I was just, uh–”
“Y’know, I was wondering,” you swiftly suggest a new subject, “…what do you look like without your glasses?”
Quirking up a brow, Nanami finds himself turning towards you amidst the cloud of blush claiming his cheeks. “Curious?”
“Very. But if they’re prescription, then please just ignore–”
“They’re not. They’ll more like sunglasses, but here, I have nothing to hide.”
At your implied request, Nanami’s glasses sit squeezed between his grip as he pulls them off his face. He’s met with your awestruck face—widened eyes and gaping lips.
“Scary, huh? I bet I look…uh…Sweetheart?”
“Nanami…you look so…different?”
“Is that a good thing?” 
“Mhm,” you nod, “I’m gonna sound old here but you look so handsome! And your eyes, they’re like brown with a dash of green?! That’s so pretty!”
He’s handsome??? That’s a word Nanami never expected to hear fall from your lips. And you’re keeping those doe eyes pinned on him and only him too.  Now how is he going to play this off? Hide his entire face behind his palm? Or maybe he should get up altogether and try to calm down…
“Oh…thank you, Darling. Um…I’m gonna go use the bathroom, alright? Be right back.”
Nanami doesn’t get the chance to hear you reply, not when he’s dead-set on returning to you. Just his luck that the bathroom is at the end of the cabin—and unoccupied.
He nearly throws himself inside, slamming the door shut behind him. Beneath his feet, he can feel the train’s latent drags over the tracks, officially beginning the long ride to Kyoto. 
Nanami leans against the white sink, grasping the thick porcelain rim with a bruising grip. He’s met with the slender mirror tucked between the chamber’s corner, and just as he knew it—he’s red. From the tips of his ears down to his cheeks, it’s all pink…and seems to only grow richer. 
That was…pathetic. A few words of kindness—no, a compliment from you about the qualities he already knows about himself places him in this sweating, breathless rut. 
He’s pathetic. If that’s all it took for him to crack, how could he be allowed to think about sleeping in the same bed as you or even bathe with you? This was the place to shake out all those nerves, all those second thoughts haunting his mind, because after this moment, Nanami would no longer be alone. Because at this moment, Nanami is staring at his last moments as a bachelor before he’s married off to the idea of being yours. 
He reaches out for the handle, granting cold water to shoot out of the facet. 
A few chilly splashes contrast the heat and he’s back to staring back at his fair-skinned reflection. 
‘A calm mind keeps a sound body’, that’s the mantra that plays in his head as he tends to his suit, tugging at the sleeve cuffs gently before exiting the bathroom and walking back to his seat. Upon finding you again, he finds you peering out the window of the passing landscape, the city slowly fading out into the countryside’s green pastures. 
He notices your fidgeting fingers, nervously linking around each other. Of course, you felt something and his jetting to the bathroom only made things worse. 
“I’m back,” he utters for your ears to hear. 
Tilting your head back against the black leather, your eyes find Nanami’s, his unfiltered mossy hues falling onto your own.
“Feel better?” Your soft voice greets him. 
Sheepishly, Nanami nods as he drops back into his seat. “Yeah, I just needed a moment.”
You shift closer to Nanami, resting your arms along the armrest between your bodies. “Did I…say something wrong?”
That’s when Nanami’s heart drops straight to the soles of his feet. He’s tossed into a state of sheer panic, raking his mind for some makeshift apology to soothe your worries. So many things he could say, but he’s settled for something he would prefer to hear: the raw and honest truth, no matter how pitiful it may seem. 
A sigh breaks out of Nanami’s chest and into the air. He resorts to squeezing at the bridge of his nose to assemble his mind. “No, no, never that, Honey! It’s just that I’m not used to getting compliments…at all, really. And I get so red, it’s all just embarrassing to me.”
You perch your chin within your open palm, a faint smile gathering on your lips. “That’s so cute, Nanami! Well, since you’re not used to ‘em, I’ll give them to you. Because…you really are handsome…sir.”
Oh, you must be doing this on purpose, pushing all his buttons to get a reaction. He can’t even hide his grin anymore, not that he wants to, you’re getting a rise out of him—and he’s loving every single moment.
He’s loving it so much that he can’t help but join you, levering his neck to give you his attention. He’s doing so with a rare smile, one that leaves the peaks of his cheeks brimmed. 
“Oh, but that’s not your job…that’s mine. How could I have forgotten to tell you just how beautiful you look? Yellow looks really nice against your skin, Sweetheart.”
Nanami catches himself in the moment, how he’s moving closer to your beaming visage. He allows his sights to shift from between your eyes and down to your lips before taking in a harrowing breath. 
There’s only one thought in his mind…this was going to be an interesting ride. 
∞ ₒ ˚ ° 𐐪𐑂 ♡ 𐐪𐑂 ° ˚ ₒ ∞ 𐐪𐑂 ♡ 𐐪𐑂 ∞ ₒ ˚ ° 𐐪𐑂 ♡ 𐐪𐑂 ° ˚ ₒ ∞
“C’mon! The villa’s just around the corner!” You point, turning around to gauge Nanami’s awareness. 
“Slow down! I’m right behind you!” he chuckles, tucking the luggage beneath his arms. 
Two and a half hours, that’s all it took for Nanami to break the ice of workplace formality with you. Since his outbreak on the train—and your affirming words; he’s found himself floating on a cloud. 
Now he’s trudging up some stairs behind you all the way up to the villa, secluded from the outside world. 
Since arriving in Kyoto, Nanami’s been taken away by the historic landscape of the area. Lush green trees stand tall amongst bushes and shrubs, and blooming flowers surround the quiet town at every corner.
The only unfortunate fact about the town was that everything closed at six on Fridays, and the train ride got you both here at six thirty. Which meant no nighttime browsing, no dinner, and room service was about to close.
But it’s a fact that Nanami’s willing to dismiss the moment he stood at the villa door with you at his side. 
He’s dipping his hand into his pocket for the key, pressing the gold-plated metal through the slot. “Here we are, go on ahead,” Nanami grins, his hand pushing the door open for you.
“Nanami,” you coo, “You go in first, you’ve been lugging those bags up here.”
“No, it’s fine. You know the saying, Sweetheart, ladies first,” He smirks.
What Nanami didn’t anticipate was how close you were, your body flush against his own. And your eyes, they’re lingering on his own as you slip past him, pulling a breathless gasp from his lungs. 
“Well…if you insist. I’m gonna go shower first then, meet you in the water, Nanami.”
“O-Okay,” he stutters out dumbly, his eyes left to hinge on your disappearing figure. 
There’s another fact that Nanami’s taken note of since the train ride, how casual you’ve become with him so quickly. The fact brought him back to his phone call with Gojo and all that was shared.
It has Nanami mulling over what Gojo said, you already have some kind of feelings toward him. The train ride provided him with enough evidence, but logic tells him not to assume anything further. 
And maybe you did feel the same way about him that he’s felt about you for the past three years. Tonight he was willing to put all that to the test, and he only hopes the results come out in his favor. 
Dragging the bags inside, Nanami shuts the doors behind him, only to take in the villa with a scanning glare. 
Takami mats replace the hardwood floor he’s become used to, with white walls surrounding him. The living room is quaint, with a black sofa against the wall with two armchairs joining the assembly. Just past the living room is a deck that looks out over the town, with a pool of steaming water just past a few steps. 
“Nanamiiii?” You sing from around the corner, breaking his focus with ease.
“Yes, Sweetheart?” He’s chuckling to himself. God, if his last name sounds this good, how would his first name roll off that tongue of yours?
He walked towards the source of your voice, only for him to be greeted with the scene of you standing in the middle of the hallway with nothing but a towel wrapped around your body. 
To ground himself fast, Nanami clears his throat and keeps his eyes pinned on you. And only your eyes. 
“Is the shower off or something?”
“Oh no, nothing like that. There’s soap, towels, toothbrushes, and toothpaste, the bathroom’s great. I was thinking, should we order something? Maybe some hot sake and snacks? 
“Get whatever you want,” he shrugs, taking a hand through his hair.  I’ll have some too, so don't wait for me. I’m gonna go shower too, so go ahead and soak.”
You give Nanami one of your smiles before walking past him—just in time to give him some words of encouragement. 
“Don’t take too long, it’s gonna get lonely without you.”
Nanami stands in the doorway of the bathroom, taking one more glimpse at you with his head shaking. 
“I won’t.
The next time Nanami gets to see you is after his shower, a brief ten minutes that’s synonymous with an eternity. He leaves the bathroom with nothing but a towel around his waist, his hair weighted by water and his mind running on mischievous fumes. 
Finally, he has you all alone with no outside noise to impede on his slice of heaven. He’s strolling down the hallway with his head held high, exuding the sheer heat of confidence off his slicked skin.
Who knew that the moment he caught a view of you, all his hard work would be swept up under the rug and replaced by naive awe?  
Nanami swears to himself that he’ll look away, but it’s a promise bound to be broken because he simply can’t find elsewhere to rest his sore eyes except on you. You and the gentle curves of your glistening body perched along the ring of rocks compassing the private hot spring. Beside you is a small bowl that floats, holding what he can safely assume to be the hot sake you wanted. 
He doesn’t quite get what’s so amusing about the scene either, but there’s something about observing you participate in the mundane task of peering out over the settling town made Nanami’s cheek swell with a rousing heat.  
A part of him almost doesn’t want to distract you—but his imagination was painting him too many scenes that needed his hand to unfold. 
Biting the innards of his cheek, Nanami gathers what’s left of his ebbing confidence to walk down the deck steps, the wood creaking beneath his every step. 
“How’s the water?” Nanami’s question breaks the silence. 
His voice coaxes you to meet him with a welcoming grin, “It’s so nice! And the sake got here too, it’s not too sweet and it’s still warm, just for you.”
Nanami stands at the pool’s edge, his hand encircling his hidden waist. “Yeah, y’know I’m not even much of a drinker, but I’ll try my hand at it tonight.”
He’s still got your regard, the two of you trapped in a trance until he notices your gaze wavering further along his body. Down his bulging chest bejeweled by water droplets,  the carefully sculpted contours of his abdomen, down to the fluffy white towel hanging around his hips. 
“Well…,” you purr, “Aren’t you coming in, Nanami?”
Slowly, Nanami lowers himself into the steamy bath, his foot settling onto the shallow bottom. The misty water splits around him as Nanami introduces himself. The water comes up no further than his mid-thigh, but the moment he sits down, he’s pulled into an embrace that captures most of his chest.  And yet, he can’t hide the sigh of relief that trumpets out his mouth, his head dropping back between his shoulder blades.
“Oh wow,” he pants, “Feels so good.”
“Right, and with a little sake…” you push the wobbling bowl to swim across the pool towards him, “You’ll feel even better.”
“Really?” Nanami smirks as the sake enters his realm. He’s quick to pour himself a cup, filling the stout ceramic cup to the brim. 
“If you want some more…gotta come a little closer, Sweetheart,” he teases as he brings the rim of the cup to his lips. 
“Guess I could go for a little more,” you give into him with a chuckle, rising from your spot with a hand clipped to the overlapping layers of your towel. 
Slow, sweeping steps cut through the water as Nanami gawks at your bearing silhouette. That pesky towel clings to your body, but all it does is complement your curves—those very curves that sit nuzzled to his side as you sit beside him. 
“How’s this? Close enough?” you press, your head lolling against the rocky edge to face Nanami’s flushed face. 
“I’ll take it,” Nanami snickers as he works himself to pour your cup. “Here, should we make a toast?”
“To what? A vacation?” you question with your cup in hand. 
“Hmm…” Nanami weighs, “To…us. And this long-awaited vacation.”
“To us, then” you cheer as your cup rings against Nanami’s.
He’s back to eyeing you; there’s a grin working onto your lips as you push down the sweet liquor, one that brings a liberating wave to wash over Nanami’s mind. He wishes he could see you like this all time, relaxed and free from the stresses of the world. 
A moment of silence falls over the scene, allowing you and Nanami to simply bask in each other’s presence. The sake’s finally settled in his system too, leaving him with a faint haze over his mind. He places his empty cup back onto the wobbling bowl before shifting towards you, his eyelids resting at half-mast. 
“Y’know, I’m really happy you agreed to come with me, Dollface,” he sighs happily, “ I like seeing you calm like this.”
“I could say the same thing to you, I don’t think I’ve seen you smile so much,” you return fondly. 
“But I’m only smiling this much because of you.”
“Pfft, what did I do?” You push off—but Nanami catches the disbelief in your voice with a squint. 
That’s when Nanami's eyes shoot toward your own. He isn’t playing around either, not with the courage coursing through his veins. Was this the moment he’s been waiting three years for? And if it was, would he ruin it by saying too much? So much doubt, so much second thoughts cloud his mind—but when he opens his mouth to speak, it’s all rooted from the depths of his heart.
“So much. You’ve done so much, all your time and care have never gone unnoticed. A-and…I …have so much I wish to tell you, but…I’ll be honest, I’m nervous.”
“Nanami? It’s okay, I’m right here and I’m here to listen.” You aimed to soothe him, your hand breaking through the water to lay against his chest. 
Oh, how he wishes you wouldn’t have done that. His heart’s already throbbing up to his ears, and with you finally laying a hand on him, he might burst right there. But the tranquil aria of your voice brings Nanami back down into his body and a clear mind. 
He clips his bottom lips between his teeth, using the sharp pain to calm the heartbeat you had complete access to. “Doll, I can’t…I can’t keep this up. I’ve um…always…always wanted to tell you that since the day you walked into my office…I knew I wanted to be yours.”
“But I mean…” There’s the logical churning in Nanami’s brain when he enters a space of realism—where he analyses everything down to the letter without regard for how cold it may roll off his tongue. 
And that includes an analysis of himself.
“And I know, what sane woman would wanna be with a man like me? I don’t express much emotion, I’m too technical and I overwork myself. But I promise to be—”
“Kento?” you interrupt, rapping the tips of your fingers against his chest. 
“Yeah?” He sulks with a frown. 
The hand you keep at his chest creeps up to his inflamed features, that same heat meddling in with your palm as you cup his cheek. A gentle turn pits Nanami to face you head-on, but to ease his rushing mind,  you give him a smile paired with the softest of tones.
“Any sane woman might not, but you’re grouping me in a category that doesn’t suit me. I don’t mind for my man to be a thinker, a hard worker. And if he has some trouble expressing himself, it’s okay. I have patience…just like you do.”
Nanami’s hiking a brow at your remarks, “So…you’ve known this entire time?”
“Known is a strong word. But Nanami, we’ve been working together for the past three years. How could I not fall for you when you treat me so kindly? All those lunch and dinner dates, the random gifts that pop up on my desk. I mean, playing it off on clients is sweet and all but the office doesn’t open until ten and the mailman doesn’t reach us until twelve. Still…the effort was sweet.”
“God, I feel so childish!” Nanami groans as he screws his eyes shut to avert your gaze. “Guess I shouldn’t have been so nervous, huh?”
“Yeah but, think of it like this,” you try to shed some light on his woes. “Three years have passed and we know each other better, down to our habits too. I think we were better off waiting rather than jumping in when we first met.”
“But that only leaves one question…” Nanami whispers to himself. He opens his eyes again and finds you as his refuge. Space isn’t a stranger in his mind, not when he’s barely a few inches away from your visage. When he finally gathers his thoughts, the words spill from Nanami’s lips without another second pass. 
“Will you…be my girlfriend, Angel?”
Nanami can hear you swallow down that lump in your throat.  Nerves, that’s the one thing he did calculate for. He’s throwing a relationship on you, without asking if you were anywhere near ready for the commitment. 
But he’s hoping. Nanami’s hoping and praying to any god that exists that you’ll grant him this one selfish wish. 
“Y’know, if we do this, things can’t go back to how they used to be…ever again.”
“I know,” Nanami hums as he brings his thumb to brush along the crest of your cheek.
“A-And, we’ll have to talk about things moving forward.”
“That’s fine with me.”
“But…what if we’re making a mistake?”
Nanami catches your chin with between his thumb and index finger, compelling you to look up into his eyes. They’re gentle, free of their usual cold stare, and superseded by a blossoming twinkle. He’s capturing you in a trance that’s leaving you breathless; breathless and at Nanami’s every whim. 
“If this is a mistake, then I’ll do anything to prove to you that it’s not. There’s no mistake here, that much I know. Whatever you want, whatever it takes…I’ll do it if it means we can be together.”
A pout pushes out onto your lips, touched by Nanami’s dedication and devotion to you. 
“Okay…but what about right now? This isn’t going to end in only a kiss.” 
“Mmm, call it consummating the relationship,” Nanami suggests under his gravitation beneath tension’s heat towards you. His eyes hang low and pin right onto your lips, hinged at the fated words speaking through the air. 
“Well then…guess I’m all yours, Kento. Yes, I wanna be your girlfriend—”
“That’s all I needed to hear.” That truly is all Nanami needs to hear because he didn’t even grant your monologue its deserved spotlight before his lips are sinking against your own. 
He has half a mind to call it the kiss of life, a weight lifting off his shoulders the moment he delves into his long-awaited bliss. It’s as he’s imagined—no, better than that. The soft plush of your lips entices him, pulling him into a game of chase. You pull back and he’s right there for more, and when you push he’s taking it all with a pathetic whimper seeping from behind his clashing teeth.
It isn’t long before his hands dip back into the water for the treasure he’s calling your hips. Hidden behind that towel, but it’s no match for him when he’s holding you now, so close that not even a drop of water could invade. 
And if Nanami had the strength to find the words, he would. But he’s using every ounce of his strength to fight against the water to have you closer. He’s guiding you right onto his lap, your body smothering against his as you straddle him. 
“Can I…take this towel off?” He quizzes between a breath—and he smirks when you conjure up a feverish nod. 
Like a feather in the wind, Nanami’s using a delicate touch to peel away the wall, his eyes growing at the sight of your bare skin in reach. It’s a reward when he yanks the thick cloth from beneath you and off into the dark abyss behind him. 
And now that Nanami’s finally got his hands on you, no force in the universe could move him. 
You’re so soft in his palms, with skin so supple he’s almost afraid of what his touch could do to you. Even with all those precautions, his faith is an unwavering one. You’re too cute for him to abstain from such bliss, especially with three long years of patience behind his belt. 
He simply has to get his hands on you, all over you until he’s become acquainted with every crease, crevice, and curve your body has to offer.
“Let me give you a quick lesson on something, Baby. I think you’ll like it too,” he hums, pulling away from this kiss.
“Oh?” you entertain, tilting your head at Nanami’s new persona. He’s grinning, his smile so wide that you swear it has to be a figment of your imagination. But the way his hands glide across your skin pulls out a vivid reminder in the form of a helpless whimper. 
 “Go ahead, show me everything you know.”
“Erogenous zones. The places where you get extra sensitive. I wanna see how many I can find. Like…right here.” He tends to your breast first, his vast palms carefully skimming along the delicate skin. He’s cupping your tits in his care, using his girth fingers to knead into the pillowy plush.
“How does that feel, Sweetheart?”
Oh, aren’t you the cutest, pulling back from the steady stream of kisses to watch how intentful Nanami is with his words. The hands you brace onto his shoulder pick up a dangerous grip when his fingers feather at your nipples, pinching the dormant buds awake. 
With this newfound audience, Nanami can’t help but perform now. He’s taken to the valley of your chest, his lips simmering against your skin as he sketches the grounds for his act in fluttering pecks. Bit by bit, he’s planting his path, nipping at your skin until his lips brush against your nipple.  
You pinch at your lip again, praying that it grounds you from what Nanami has in store. “Feel so…so good, Ken,” you whine with setting eyes. 
He doesn’t get his way without hearing your mouth, a delicate chirp that melts into a moan. As your eyes crack open once more, he’s sure to meet you with gentle olive irises. 
“That’s my girl. Too pretty to hide when I’m merely teasing you. I’ve got all night with you, remember?”
That’s as much as a reminder to himself too, he has all night, two days, and the rest of his days to explore you. But already he’s missed out on so much time, so he hopes you’ll excuse him for the rush now.
The rush of his back finally traveling past your tweaked ties and down to l the small of your back, his burly hands dressing your delicate body like a corset. If he remembers from his days back in university, the back is a special place. It’s where your spine can be found, where your curves take shape, but there’s something else here that Nanami can’t quite put his finger on.
Until he does.
His fingers dust right over the divots in your back, those two dimples waiting for attention. He remembers now, the insane levels of sensitivity hidden in plain sight. He doesn’t want to give away his ruse, but for all you know, he’s merely inches away from grabbing onto your ass.
So he does it, delicately allowing a few fingers to slip past the water and sink into the pert plump flesh, leaving only his thumbs to fill out those precious jewels of your lower back. The pads of his thumbs lay teasing strides as a ploy until he’s located those hidden cords of nerves. 
He can’t wait anymore, softly pulsing his thumbs against the dips, solely for his ears to be graced by the prettiest of chords: your heavy gasps drumming into the air.
“This is an overlooked one. Known as the lumbar, but it’s simply your lower back. By using a liiiitle pressure like this—”
“Kennn…h-hold on, that’s so…Ohmy–!” 
That’s the gasp he’s looking for, the satisfaction parading itself somewhere deep inside Nanami. The jolt wrecking through your body only brought you right into his hands and pinned against his chest.  His lips take to your ears for his own bliss, hiding a sadist smirk behind his encouraging words. 
“Now, now, those nasty words don’t suit you, Angel. Can’t you find anything else to say with that pretty mouth of yours?”
“B-But, I—“
Another slip along your back dimples sends you reeling against Nanami, your head dropping to fill the crook of his neck.
“Nanami! That’s …t-too mmuch for me,” your plea falling on deaf ears.
“Oh Baby, did you forget who I am? The body…this body….your body…there’s so many ways to touch you, tease you, make you cum without getting remotely close to your pussy…’nd I’m just getting started.”
Nanami veers himself enough for his eyes to be cast upon you, his hazel hues scanning over your fucked out face; those eyes fluttering at half-mast, your lips broken fleeing hot pants chest. He can’t help but soothe the pain with pleasure, painting the flustered tips of your ear in deft pecks.
“You just so happen to land yourself a sex therapist for a man.”
It’s a truth that Nanami doesn’t let you absorb, not while he’s playing with you like this. His thumbs taunt your lower back and his hands strapped along your ass pull your hips into transit, rutting against him for a sliver of relief. 
But Nanami’s grown so desperate that he’s slouching—permitting his back to slip against the bath’s wall if it meant he could plug your pleas with his bulge. 
And wasn’t his theory proved right on the first try?
Because the second his hips curl right up under you, he’s gasping at how the lips of your cunt drag against the drenched towel—and along his poor cock. So much fervor, so much passion is driving your hips to rock like this, forcing the towel to lick at your clit.
But…that’s his new job. A new task that comes with his promotion—and one that he’s dying to commence. 
“Ken,” his name highlighted behind your moans.
He gets the chance to watch you reach out for him, your hands lacing around the nape of his neck and pulling him close. So close that your foreheads rest against each other and all you can do is dress each other’s mouth with aimless pants. 
“You want more, don’t you?” He chuckles. 
And you could respond, but you allow your lips to deliver the message to him loud and clear. Back to that familiar cadence, your lips falling into a dance made for you. But when your tongue dips into his mouth for the first time, Nanami swears he could cum right then and there. 
Your tongue, velvety and so kind, traces along his own—riding up along every curve and back down to his bottom lip. 
“Fuck,” is all Nanami can mutter…because…fuck. Such a dirty word, but his mind’s running on nothing but the lust clouding his core, and rushing to bully his cock with relentless pangs. 
“Kento…is that?...” you giggle, breaking from his lips when something hard perks up between your legs. 
“That’s what you do to me, Baby. ‘m so hard already, waiting for you to be mine.”
“Aww, but I am yours, Honey,” you avow, raking your nails along the deep chisels of his back. Against his lips, you whisper such a lulling coo that pulls at Nanami’s restraint, using the exact words he didn’t need to hear. 
“So…what are you waiting for?”
Nanami kisses his teeth, sparking a devious grin to claim his mouth.
“Part three of this lesson.”
A hand of his snakes between your bodies, twisting and tugging his towel out from under him until he’s free. 
“Another erogenous zone, huh? Can I…try to find yours?” 
Nanami could never deny you, who was he to start now of all times? He decides to help you out by laying a grip around your wrist, leading your hand down between your bodies
When your hand laces around his pudgy length, he’s gritting his teeth at your bestowing grip. So loose but cradles his cock with such care he could almost shed a tear. 
But all you do is lug your lax fist up and down, singly to tease Nanami of what could come to pass. And you do it all without failing to keep your sights aligned with his own. So, just this once he’s letting you take the reins. 
“Go on, I’ll even give you extra points if you know how to handle it.” His hands float back up to your hips and he finally relaxes—his body stills, his mind blanks, and Nanami inhales a breath what he deems to be tranquility at its finest.
He’s resting in your care, closing his eyes and allowing himself to feel everything—every beat of his heart, the waves crashing against his chest, the stirring of nerves brewing in his stomach. 
That alone grows, its futile persistence slowly consuming Nanami. He’s touched himself so many times before, but it all fails to compare when he has you working on his behalf. It’s more than he can handle.  
And he’s too keen on hiding it either, Nanami’s head lolling back when your hand gains fervency. Your wrist works sloppy twirls around the belled crown of his cock that coaxes a livid heat to rip through his nerves. 
“J-Just like that, niiice ‘nd slow…g-get the tip too—fuck!” 
Your lips cling to his exposed bobbing Adam’s apple, littering his skin with kisses and taunts. 
“Aww, so sensitive, Ken. And ‘m only touching you exactly how you want me to,”
“Fu-fuuuck, that’s…d-don’t squeeze down like that o-or–!” He’s barely huffing out. His chest’s struggling to keep up, relying on labored breaths to feed his lungs what bits of air he gathers.
Only a few minutes into the relationship, Nanami’s already pushed to the edge, his body teetering the dangerous line of pain and pleasure. It feels so good to have you touch him, but the heft of his impending high has him seeing stars each time he blinks. It’s a line of pain and bliss that has tears welling in Nanami’s eyes, his broken mind split on an outcome that dooms him either way.
“Ha-Hah! Baby, please! I don’t wanna cum yet, slow down!” He’s sobbing with hands clipping to your waist. His nails sink into your plushy skin, marking you with a bruising belt of crimson crescents. 
“But you’re so close, Ken!”
“I know, I know, but I can’t cum before you do, Angel. Wouldn’t feel right to me.”
His hand finds a new hold along your wrist, pulling your worked hand through the water and pressing along the bulging ripples of his chest. 
“Besides…All that sake’s got me craving something so sweet. Think you can help me out with that, Honey?”
“Mm-hm…’course, Ken.”
“Good.” He hums as his gaze falls over the salacious scene’s background: the wooden deck. He’s also keen on calling the towel he freed from you back into play, tugging the soaked cotton towel across the deck. 
Patting his hand atop the deck, Nanami ushers you to join his next lesson, “C’mon. Bend over and keep that pretty ass in the air for me, alright?”
If there’s something Nanami knows about you, it’s your ear for direction. Every task, every favor, and anything he’s asked of you during the past three years was always completed beyond expectation.
And this was no different. 
The arch you take on is nothing short of heavenly, your face hidden behind the blossoming spread of your ass. “Beautiful,” he ponders aloud, his wandering hands rowing along the luscious junctures of your curves. “I still need your help, Darling. Spread yourself fr’ me.”
He oversees the hesitancy that claims you, your trembling hands reaching around the globes of your ass. Ever so gently you pull yourself apart before him, only for a whimper to bring all your hard work crumbling down. 
“But Ken…that’s so—fuck!”
Obiviously you’re nervous, he’s asked you to reveal yourself like it’s something so easy. As his newfound position entitles, he’s supposed to ease your woes, not enforce more than what the world already dishes out. That’s why Nanami takes a thumb right over your clit, drawing loose rings around the timid bud. He’s so painstakingly slow too, ensuring that every nerve is caught beneath his tantric trance. 
“That’s so what, Baby? You don’t have to be nervous with me, just wanna make you feel good.” And that’s a sworn promise of his, the kiss he places onto your ass brandishes it as such. 
“Take your time, ‘m right here.”
Words have power, and he’s witnessing the magic with naked eyes. Your hands, once trembling and timid, now pries yourself apart for Nanami’s sake. 
“How’s that?” you press, tilting your head to find Nanami’s hidden silhouette. 
“Perfect. So pretty too, Baby. Oh, look at how cute your clit is! Mmm, I know you’re sweet too, aren’t you, Darling?”
What else had to be said, Nanami’s really taken a liking to your pussy, the way your clit drinks up his touch with jaunty throbs. He can’t ignore that blatant fact that you’re dripping into his impressions. He could take some credit for the sticky mess unfolding between your legs, but he’s more interested in furthering his role.
So it’s no wonder when Nanami can feel himself drawing nearer, his heavy eyes guiding him to meet your splayed cunt within mere inches. 
“Tell me, y’know that this cute clit of yours is another one of those erogenous zones ‘m teaching you about, right?” He breathes out against your bare cunt. 
“Y-Yeah…” you huff, biting at your lip. 
“Good girl. Let me see how long it takes to make a mess out of you.”
A man starved, that’s all Nanami is as he falls victim to your displayed cunt. He nurses you with a pout, granting him the exclusivity of tending to your clit. He places a soft kiss as a foundation, melting all your woes beneath his supple curves of a ruined grin.
He seals the spry bulb between his lips, his purling jaw working to bring your clit to its blushing bulbous swell. 
He’s allowing his tongue to slip onto the scene, the slicked palette pedaling kind, short strokes to the pink pearl. His heavy tongue drifts along the raw nerves softly, curling just at your swelling hood to tease. 
Between a thin stare, Nanami’s thinking of how cute it is that your plump clit dances along with his tongue. It takes two to dance and Nanami couldn’t have asked for a finer partner. Whenever he takes the time to twirl, swirl, and nudge at you, he’s met with a grand pirouette that laces around his tongue. 
“Fuck!” the curse ripping from your puffy lips. It feels good, that much he knows thanks to your melodies. But if only you knew the discipline it’s taking Nanami from not burying himself between the fat mounds of your cunt. 
You’re like silk against his slicked muscle, those soft folds of yours sewed along his curled tongue. He can’t even begin to account for how many times he’s traced at the pulsing hem of your folds, nipped at your fluttering hole, even the number of kisses he’s tongued out of your clit, all to pull out that saccharine stream of ambrosia from your slit. So sweet, so sticky, exactly what he needs to soothe his mind from the edge it sits on. 
He hears your cries too, your sobs, the whimpers, and the need to cum blended with each word. Nanami wants to soothe you too, feed your numbed mind kind words of reassurance. But greed’s got the better of him, the sin staining his very tongue as he indulges in your honey. 
But when he catches the way your hands dig into the plush of your ass, he’s wincing at the sight.  
He’s also keen to that hand of yours drifting dangerously close to his canvas. He’s aware of your game and allows for that stubborn digit of yours to nip at your slit. 
Those subtle pulses lead to you sinking in a little deeper, a certain detail he can’t let slip for too long.
“Am I not enough for you, Honey?” Go on, show me how you touch yourself.”
His chocolate hues break wide at how greedily your puffy hole envelopes your finger, swallowing each sloppy stride you pump into your core. But that’s all it is—cheap, sloppy work.
Somehow and someway, your body’s enjoying it, the addition of your finger bringing shivers to rake across your skin. 
And while Nanami isn’t a jealous man, he’s resenting that touch of yours with a nasty sneer. 
He could shy away, let his mouth help guide you through that high begging to crash through your body. You’re working so hard—but Nanami works harder. 
The longest finger he has pecks at your busy hole. He doesn’t think much of it at first—until he catches your hole latching onto his teasing scheme. Before he can go on about how much of a mess you’ve made out of yourself, a dumbfounded awe strikes him. He’s able to attest to it, how his digit is being suckered inside you. 
“Oh fu—knew you still needed my help…but we can work together too.” He’s chuckling to conceal that crack in his voice. 
It’s a slow, wet draw that has you stretching, gasping to be stuffed by the oblivious girth of his finger. But it’s so wet that your pussy and your mouth have to squeal out against his deepening reach. 
“K-Kennn, fuck! Right there!” You gasp, yielding your endeavors at Nanami’s introduction. 
“Now I didn’t say to stop, Angel. Keep going, pretend like I’m not even here.”
And he means every word, he’s waiting for you to pick that sloppy pace, one that he challenges with the slow drags of his own. You lack the grace he strives for, the same grace that brings him right to your sweet spot without fail.
“O-ooh shit, Kento!” Your hips jerk from his ministrations, but he isn’t letting your sobs distract him from such a discovery. 
“Hm? Is that your spot, Honey? Right here?” He taunts, sending his ruined digit to thrash against the stiffening bundle of nerves.
“‘M so close, Ken! Plea-Please don’t stop!”
Don’t stop? Don’t stop? He had no plans of stopping, yet your body seems to cry out against your compelling demands. Why, Nanami wants to bring about the lush high you deserve, whereas your hips suddenly picked up such a nasty habit of jerking away from his mouth has him thinking otherwise. 
“I told you already, you don’t have to beg me. It’s right there, hm? Let it all out for me.”
He tags a hand at your rebelling hips and pulls you right onto his coiled tongue, where defeat lies along the horizon. He relies on his lips,  now plump and plush, to tack onto the sputtering bulb of your clit and melt away all that prudish tension with a kiss. 
Such a kiss allows him to trace over your spry hood, to roll out the glossy pearl in riveting tides. And when paired with his pummeling finger, Nanami can only count the seconds it takes for your body to crumble.
Nanami draws him back exclusively to watch your beautiful demise. He keeps his hand at your hips, kneading at the grip he used to restrain you out of pity. It’s an honor for him to be by your side, aiding you through what he deems to be a perilous high. 
He’s so endowed to your allure, that Nanami can’t keep his thoughts all to himself—no, he utterly has a duty to share all he’s thinking with you, even how pretty you look in the face of ecstasy. 
“Look at you, wanted to cum ‘nd I did it all for you…give it to me, c’mon, Angel.”
Your hand can still be found in his, clutching at his palm through every tremor, every sob, and the heavy sacrifice of your breath. He’s right there with you, decorating your skin with soiled pecks until your breath is caught and steady.  
“Good?” He checks, his hand skimming along your skin. 
“Oh, Ken…th-that was really good!” 
“Well then…can you give me one more?”
That’s when you finally turn around to face him, gems of water adorning his body. Your eyes hinge on a particular sight though, his cock standing up at a slight curve.
Tan with the pretty cream hues of his shaft that contrast his own skin—and the blushing pink tip of his cock by miles. Vibrant veins line his every inch, lacing around his girth without fail. The underside’s heavy too, defined by the contours that flush out his cock. And of course the tip’s fat, what else did you expect, the blushing pink heart that tops him off pecks at you, his cock primed by tease. 
Nanami’s touched by how quick he’s got your attention, and he plans of keeping your time well-spent. That’s why he’s swift to bestow a coddling grip around his, feeding himself with a few lazy pumps for your explicit viewing pleasure. 
“But…I forgot to bring condoms—didn’t think we’d get this far. We don’t have to–”
“No,” you grin, passing a sinister glint back to Nanami, “It’s fine.”
Oaths spill from his lips the moment you grant him such a blessing. He’s already nuzzled against you, preparing his fragile mind with what lies beyond your hole. 
“Oh, you got so wet for me, fuck,” the words he’s mumbling aren’t even made for your ears—he’s raving straight to your pussy. He’s dragging his slicked tip through your folds, up and down, tracing at your slit with lazy nips. His prodding bellhead comes to smother your tight hole in messy kisses, lathering up a rich foamy web that’s waiting to be destroyed. 
“I’ll be gentle, so be nice to yourself too ‘nd don’t rush,” Nanami hums as he hunches over your body. 
He’s keeping his hips loose as he sends his cock eight inches deep. Eight inches that he’s chosen to feed to you through kind snaps of his hips. Your puffy entrance suckles at the slit of his cock, drinking up every drop of his precum before he’s hidden inside your walls.
“Fuh–Angel, t-that’s just th-the tip, al-alright? Got a litt-ttle more to go,” He gasps. But that’s to serve as a reminder to him that he has more to go–which means Nanami has to grasp onto his composure for just a little while longer.
The urge’s there, but why rush when you feel so good right here? Warming up his tip with silky pulses that test Nanami’s resolve. The hands he’s chained to your hips grow heavy, bearing a harsh grip once he’s glued his hips to the thick plush of your ass.
“Gonna move now, Angel. Tell me if it’s too much right now, ‘kay?”
Nanami’s so ingrained with your suckling heat that he almost doesn’t want to pull out. If you keep squeezing him like that too, he knows he could in a matter of minutes. 
But then a thought laps through his mind—he’s wearing a rare honor of delving into your pussy bare. 
And that’s a chance he’s not willing to risk.
Slowly, his hips reel from you, stealing back those girthy inches from your greedy walls. He darts his eyes down to the sight, his cock bore with your slick. So messy what a few minutes can do, and it’s left him with a fixture for sore eyes. 
Creamy, thick, and yet…it’s not enough. No, it’s not enough for Nanami, he needs you creaming a nice cloudy ring around the base of his cock.
Since that’s the task he’s chasing, Nanami doesn’t hesitate to seal himself back into you, finding a kind rhythm to alleviate your walls to his bulling girth. Every roll of his hips brings him closer to his goal, you’re easing up around him. He’s almost inspired by your resolve to take him to feed you just a little more of a tempo, his hips catching wind of your welcoming advances.
Your voice breaks his concentration. “Ken?” 
“Ye-yeah, Honey?”
“M-More…I can take it, Baby.”
He had no business hearing that fall from your lips, that request only makes Nanami throb. He’s all for it now, reeling his hips back until the very tip of his cock threatens to leave you. The filthy rut he’s fallen into reads through your ass, towing hypnotic waves to ripple through your skin. 
You feel so good around him, your satin-like walls snuggling his girth. He can feel you working at his own demise, all that squeezing feeding the knot in his stomach. Oh, how he wants to cum, to paint you in his seed—but that’s not an honor yet deserved, not while your orgasm has yet to present itself. 
He’s so hellbent on being so kind to you that every bit of his body acts in accordance towards his wish. The thick head he delivers to, the girth of his cock keeps your greedy walls at bay, and the swell of his heavy balls babies your clit with light taps of rapture. 
He’s almost forgotten where you two were—outside with neighbors under a kilometer away. But who’s Nanami to stop those delicious moans from leaving your mouth? You’re singing him a song of  how well he’s pleasing you, how deep he sends his cock to reach. He’s been busy at your sweet spot for sometime, painting the nerves in his scent, in his kisses, and in his fervor. 
“That’s it, stay with me. Y’re taking me so damn good too, Angel. Squeezing down on me like that…
“Fuck, Ken..I-my legs…can’t keep them up anymore…”
Before Nanami can even offer some advice, your body’s already given up the hope of support. Your legs stretch out along the towel, forcing you to lay on your tummy. 
“Hm, don’t worry about it, just lay there all pretty and take this dick, okay?”
Of course, Nanami’s found a solution, as he always does. This solution prompts him to trap you beneath his world when planting the flat of his hands beside your head, his hunkering body stretching over you. He slots his chest along your back, leaving his hips to break away from you. 
All your curves, all your breaths, all your whimpers and your moans were his own when he’s this close. He can feel everything, even the way your walls flutter around him with this newfound angle. 
He gives you time to adjust while he gets to explore you, his eyes searching for where to lay his artwork. 
Right there, along your shoulder, he’s already imagining all the kisses and bites claiming your soft skin. 
“Tell me…” he mutters between a trail of pecks along your shoulder. “You know what I love about you?”
“N-No…what’s that?” you quiz, levering your chin back to find Nanami hard at work. 
His earthy hues fall prey to your gaze. He’s compelled to abandon his work to favor you, the answer to your question dribbling from his mouth. 
“Oh, what do I love about my sweet baby? It’s how vocal you are, always telling me what’s on your mind. Just like right now…” he smirks, “Even though I can’t see, you always seem to tell me  how deep I am…and how much deeper I can go. Just…liiike this…”
A lazy drive of his hips sends his cock to deliver a wispy kiss right to your cervix, coaxing your tummy to cave in against the towel.
“Oooh shit! Ken! Fuck!!”, your gaping mouth mewls.
Nanami simply grins at how fast your hands ball up the towel between your fists, he’s proven right. Not that he cares all that much, bearing the privilege of hearing your sweet cry is all the reward he needs. 
“Oh I know, Baby, I know,” his voice carrying a suave chord, “I’m gonna be nice, fuck you right too.”
A man of his word he is, Nanami Kento. 
“KenKenKen! ‘M gonna fucking cum again!” you sob, bucking your hips up against him.
“Again? That’s my girl. Gonna cum on my dick, right? I’ll make it a good one too, don’t you worry!”
He’s working on your behalf, grinding his hips along the swell of your ass. He can’t go any deeper than this, but he’ll admit that he’s neglected your sweet spot for quite some time now, Blame it on the feverish heat subscribing to his body, but he’s ready to focus his all onto you.
That includes kissing at your sweet spot with the head of his cock. Rolling his hips ever so carefully, sketching along those inflamed nerves with buttery pecks, he’s ready to make you cum—hard. Harder than what any toy, your fingers, and any man ever could.
Though, it’s when he slips up and finds your cervix—that’s what brings about your downfall. His ill-minded finding brought about deep-rooted tremors to wreck your core, capturing your entire body with a hellish wrath. Your walls clench at Nanami, cursing him for being such a fate before you.
Yet, all he can do is cheer you on, chuckling at how his efforts brought him to a place of bliss. 
“That’s it, cream all on me, Baby. Fuck, trying to make me cum too, aren’t you?”
“Ken, I-I—ohmygod!”
“Shhh, I got you, Sweetheart,” he’s humming along your cheek, “Come back down to me…we’re not done yet.”
“We’re not??!”
Nanami hides the sly grin on his face as he turns back to the awaiting pool of water behind you both.
“Of course not. We came all the way out here, did you think I wasn’t going to take you in the water too, Baby?”
“Ken…I…I don’t think I can cum anymore!” 
“Oh yes, you can! You didn’t even squirt for me yet! But if you don’t do it tonight, I’ll make you squirt tomorrow.”
Selfish, so utterly selfish of him to try and pull another round out of you, but his tempered patience challenges this rare spout of excitement. For in simply a few hours, Nanami’s become addicted to you—your lips, your body, your moans, even watching you cum at his hand, he’s addicted to it all.
“One…one more, ‘kay?” you wager, a look of your glossy doe eyes consuming his sights.
“Okay! That—”
“But…” you swiftly intervene, your weary hand searching for rest along his thigh. 
Nanami’s eyes follow your lithe hand, tracking the lazy path it takes up his body. He’s still waiting to hear the rest of your deal, but how can he when your hand trails up his thigh, curving up around the base of his cock and up towards his flexing abdomen. 
“Ken, baby?” The melodic call of his name breaks the trance, Nanami’s sights meeting your own.
“Y-Yeah?”
Nanami’s eyes light up at the smile adorning your face.
“I wanna ride you. It’s the least I can do for makin’ you work on your vacation.”
He’s gawking at you. Dumbly too. His mouth surrenders to that gap and he merely stares at you. That’s all he can do to distract himself from the mind-numbing rush of blood filling out every inch of his cock. 
Because thanks to you…he’s painfully hard again too. 
“Aww, you like that idea? You’re already making a mess, Ken.”
He looks down. You’re right. All this excitement has him dripping aimlessly, the back of your thigh covered in patchy drops of his precum. 
But he can’t bring himself to move, not when he’s caught between a place of utter embarrassment and pitiful arousal. Should he apologize? Should he wipe it off?
As you crawl back onto your hands and knees, suddenly his cock’s sitting homely between the soft, thick globes of your ass, Nanami doesn’t know where he found the restraint to not paint your skin white right then and there.
And you have all the confidence to taunt him now too? Taking advantage of his dumbstruck silence to roll your hips against him, stroking his weeping cock ever so slowly.
“C’mon, Ken, I’m waiting. Don’t you wanna go back in the water and relax…with me? We can all that fun we’ve been talking about too.”
He’s stuck on the sight. Up and down, you’re dragging back on his cock, leaving the white-hot tip raw and aching; leaving those portly veins to bloat and flourish along his length; leaving the spill of precum to dangerous tread behind the lines of milky white. 
“Fuck” Nanami’s voice rattles out at last. “I might—no, if we do…I'm so sorry…Sweetheart, I’m sorry but I’m not gonna last long!”
“That’s okay,” you coo, “We can go nice and slow just to calm you down.”
Shamefully, Nanami nods at your assurance. As to how you ended up with a hand over him is shameful—but a well-played card. 
Slowly, he descends back into the haze of steam, the water welcoming his body once more. He sits himself at the bottom of the pool, the water coming up just above his navel. 
In the corner of his eye, Nanami carefully watches as you slip back onto the water and crawl into his sprawled lap to straddle him. Your arms drape along his broad shoulders and he’s already reaching for your hips with hungry hands.
Your forehead presses up against his own, sealing  Nanami in a spell he couldn’t imagine breaking from.
“Gonna go slow, okay?” You whisper, your hips drifting above the pink crown of his cock. 
Though he’s been buried to the hilt of your heat, it’s still foreign to Nanami’s mind what it means to have you split over him. He doesn’t know that to have your pretty pussy split and sputtering dumb means to carve your walls into his shape, his size, to mold you around every single detail that comes with a man of his caliber. 
And that upright curve he’s donning too. 
The sweltering gush that your walls paint Nanami behind has him reeling beyond comparison. He’s so desperate too, the urge to snap you down to his tensed thighs teases the very hands he keeps pinned to your luring hips.
But he can’t forget that it’s an effort you make to accommodate him, laggardly drowning your poor hole beneath the sinful weight of his length. 
Taking him like this, it’s overwhelming to have something so thick, so hot, and stupidly twitching out of sheer excitement fill you like it’s easy. 
Yet, you do it anyway with that cute break between your lips, gasping like something so shocking has your attention. You do it with furrowed brows, confounded as to how you’ve ended up gaping around his fat cock out of the kindness of your heart.
It’s all so shrewd, but your sacrifice makes everything worthwhile once Nanami’s immersed in your spitting cunt once more. 
He’s right back to relish how your walls pamper every bit of his cock in those flirting embraces. He’s right back to gritting his teeth, finding it in himself to bear that persuasive hold you’ve laid before him. 
Nanami has it in him to cry out, to rattle off hymns of how well that sloppy pussy of yours got him—but all he can conjure up is the will to pin a sloppy kiss on your lips. 
His mind might be fleeting, but Nanami’s learning you too are a woman of your word; slow is an understatement for the mesmerizing toll your hips adopt. It’s a mesmerizing toll that’s slow enough to have the likes of Nanami—a man of rigid logic—gasping for air. 
You’re still squeezing him, but it’s more aligned with your intentions now rather than the nerve of taking him on like before. It’s all so tedious, having your hips roll all the way to the top,  dangling at the tip, only for your walls to lather up the fat pink bulb in gummy kisses. 
All the teasing has his cock threatening to slip out, cursing your cunt in twitching for stealing back the shared bliss. 
“Oh fuck—Wha…What are you doing to me, Angel?” He’s whimpering against your lips, and your smirk catches every single word. 
You feign innocence with him, pressing a merciful peck onto his quivering frown. “What are you talking about, Honey? I’m taking my sweet time with you, just like I said I was.”
That’s what you say, but Nanami’s aware that there’s more to your claim than what meets his ear. If you were really taking your sweet time with him, why is he spiraling down this pit of ravishing piety? 
You’re drawing out whimpers he himself never heard before, his jaw slacked by the sudden song on his heart. You’re only riding him, but can you feel how every bit of his body surrenders to you? You’re following through on your word, yet here Nanami is, chasing after your swiveling hips with mindless bucks of his own. 
You’re too clever at having him dance in your palm, and that’s something Nanami can’t help but plot against. He isn’t one to challenge the powers that be—but something about this moment taunts the very chemistry of his psyche.
He has to even the playing field, though, in his current state of writhing and plight, all he has is his hands.
For his ruse to taste success, Nanami’s hands can be found bound to a particular parlour of your back—the lumbar, or…your lower back. He’s sure you’ve forgotten about his speech from earlier, but he meant every word. For what he possessed in his hands was both the power and knowledge to have you cum without any real need for penetration.
And while that holds true…he does have you on his cock right now, working so hard to relieve him. He’s musing over the idea, hungry to see  how hard you’d cum if he picks up his teasing.
His thumbs slot themselves back along those dimples he’s grown fond of, his sinking digits shattering the powerful strides of your hips. 
“Oh—You’re back to that again?!” You jolt, your hips seized by his mischievous ploy. 
Nanami’s drinking in your exasperation with a smirk. “Told you, there’s so many ways to make you cum. 
He’s bracing for the torturous words you have in store for his brash rebuttal.  That’s the fate he’s anticipated to befall him. 
He wasn’t, however, prepared for your encircling arms to pull him closer, your bodies simmering against one another. He didn’t anticipate the kisses you’d place at his gaping lips, gentle and sweet. And there’s no possible way that Nanami could have orchestrated the words set to leave your lips.
“Oh yeah? Then let’s cum together, Ken.”
“Are…you close?” he whispers softly.
“Mhm,” you nod, “And I know you are too.”
Nanami’s taken aback by your tentative nature. You know his habits, mannerisms, and now how dangerously close he was to spilling in your womb. He had the strength to press you up along the pool walk to finish himself off, but where’s the fun in such bold novelties?
Because if he did follow through on that thought, he’d be missing out on bearing witness to your eyes screwing shut when you drop your hips a little too hard, bringing his cock right back to your sweet spot.
“K-Ken, I’m–!” That’s all he needs to hear, not when your face paints him a clear picture. With your eyes rolling back into your skull, your forehead sunken along the crook of his neck, and that breathless sob warming his skin—you were right at your peak.  
It doesn’t help his cause that you get all the more sensitive, that minor mistake throwing your whole body into the heat of chaos. You’re ruining him in flittering clenches, pulling every ounce of Nanami’s strength to the surface of his skin. 
He’s seeing stars in his eyes, white patches seizing his vision as your poor pussy stutters around him. He knows what’s due to follow—that all-powerful weight that pins him down and forces that tragic cycle to crash down on Nanami. 
His legs are subdued by a trifling rip of nerve, rendering Nanami’s reprisal futile. He’s going to cum, that’s the pill he has to swallow. But he can’t begin to fathom that he’s going to cum inside you. 
Sure, it’s a thought he’s paid some time too—every day for the last three years. But now that he’s faced with that want, he can’t help but rebuke it completely. 
He’s reaching between your bodies to grab at his cock, wedging himself from your heat with a sob. You were so good to him, even better around him and now he’s forced to bear his orgasm alone while your own courses through your veins. 
“‘m…c-cum—cumming! Fuck, ‘m gonna cum, Baby!” He seethes, clenching his jaw when his overworked body is faced with the lone choice of release. A release that has opal hues spitting from his twitching slit, thick ropes of white staining the water. 
He’s devastated by a hitching breath that leaves his stomach caved and his burly chest shuddering for air. Nanami’s head is sent to roll, dropping back as he’s doing his best to hold back that woeful moan. 
And he’s still going, still tainting the water with his definition of healing. The hot spring was healing, but your pussy was the epitome of rejuvenation. 
“Hey,” Nanami’s hitching voice rasps as he strokes the small of your back, “Still with me?”
All you can deliver is a sheepish nod, your arms still clinging to Nanami for support. And he’s got you, his hands cradling your delicate body through the reeling fatigue that comes after such bliss. 
He’s exhausted, worked raw and to the bone, but Nanami still finds the energy to pull both you and himself out of the water and into the bedroom. 
With just the indirect rays of light from the hallway, Nanami gently lays you to rest upon the vast face of the bed. You look so peaceful like this, nodding off with a faint grin plastered to your puffy lips. He finds himself inclined towards you, hovering above you as he dusts the back of his hand past your cheeks.
“Sweetheart,” he coos, “You did so good for me, so proud of you! I’ll take care of the rest, don’t worry–”
“Ken?” your hoarse voice croaks out. 
Nanami immediately gives in to you, concern dressing his face with knitted brows. “Yes, Sweetheart?”
Your hand creeps towards his own, your fingers weaving around his own. He can tell you have a question on your mind, it’s begging to come out too. 
“It’s okay, tell me what’s wrong.”
“Well…can I still come to work Monday?”
Nanami’s eyes soften as he peers over to you. Even in this darkness, he can make out the frown playing at your lips. His hand comes to soothe all your worries, cupping your cheek with his thumb and stroking the highs of your cheek. 
“Of course, Baby. You can come in, leave early, whatever you want.”
“So then…can I still work with you?” 
That question troubles Nanami, striking him inaudible as he cautiously considers his answer. If he had things his way, Nanami wanted you to go shopping, to spoil yourself with spa days and classy cafes. He wanted you to enjoy the bliss of free time, while he worked to ensure all your dreams could come true. 
But then again, he didn’t have it his way. 
He has you to consider now, and if working with him brought you joy, who was he to ruin that?”
“Well…I want you to go have fun, go shopping, go to the spa. But that’s what I want. I also love having you at the office with me too so…if that’s something you really want, then…”
“It is! Now that we’ve figured that much out…let’s go.”
You make an attempt to stand, only for Nanami to catch your trembling body within his care. “Um..where are we going?” He asks, draping an arm around your waist.
“To shower. I may be tired, but I think I can handle a shower with you…and only a shower, Kento.”
“That’s fine by me. But, since you’re up…we should also plan out what we’re doing tomorrow. I was thinking we leave here at 9:30 and—”
“Kennn,” you draw out, “It’s vacation. Let things happen, okay?”
He muses at your words, “Let things…happen, you say?” 
Let things happen? That’s the kind of advice he prefers to steer clear of. And yet, it’s gotten Nanami to achieve his wildest dream—turning his pretty assistant into his girlfriend. He steals one more glance at you, a look that fetches a smile to grace his timid features. 
“Then, we’ll let things happen, won’t we, Darling?”
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mimicmimikyuwrites · 7 months
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Jealousy - Lucifer (Hazbin Hotel) x Fem!Sinner!Reader SMUT
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Summary: Lucifer's jealousy emerges when your Ex from when you were alive enters the hotel in search of you. Lucifer makes sure to claim you as his.
Contents/Possible Warnings: P in V sex, dom!Lucifer, cream pie, Lucifer being possessive, marking, unprotected sex, degradation (it happens like once), SMUT, MDNI
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A typical day in Hell was far from calm, so whenever a peaceful moment occurred, even a small one, you made sure to savor it, appreciating it for what it was. For example, you intended to let the wonderful moment you were currently in last for as long as you possibly could. You had been watching a movie in your room in the hotel, but by now your attention had turned away from the movie in question and onto Lucifer. The king of Hell had snuggled up closer to you than he already had been, his head resting on your shoulder as he watched the show.
The simple gesture made you melt, and you couldn't resist gently turning his face to look at you. Lucifer looked at you curiously, waiting for your next move. You placed a gentle kiss on his cheek, enjoying the smile it brought to his face.
"Hmm, that was nice, but I think you missed, love." He leaned in, closing the gap between you two, kissing you lovingly. You moved to deepen the kiss and— a knock came at the door. You parted from the kiss and looked towards your room door as Lucifer let out a disappointed sigh. "I'll make sure to give you as many kisses as you want later, alright?" You whispered to him, giving him a quick kiss on the cheek before standing up and answering the door.
"(Y/N)!" Charlie exclaimed in excitement. "The hotel has a new guest! They said that they know you. You two must've been friends before! Come on, let's go see them!" Without warning, Charlie eagerly grabbed you by the hand, pulling you through the hallways of the hotel and towards the main lobby.
In the lobby, you saw them. The fucker you had hoped would never die purely so you would never have to see them again. Yet, here they were in all of their trashy, shit glory. "Hi." You said with a fake smile, trying to remain civil and hold back the resentment that had since been dormant.
"(Y/N)! Baby!" Your ex grinned, approaching you with wide, open arms. "I'm so glad I found you after all these years. It took some asking around, but we're together again!" They wrapped their arms around you, squeezing you tight enough that it felt like you might suffocate.
"Woah, haha! Hands off, please!" Lucifer appeared next to you, poking at your ex with his cane, annoyance seeping into his forced, polite tone. They finally released you, glaring at Lucifer as he stepped between the two of you.
"And just who the hell are you?" Your ex questioned, watching as Lucifer wrapped an arm around your waist, pulling you close to his side. "I feel like I should be asking you that question." Your boyfriend replied snidely, any attempt to be polite despite the situation now far gone.
"Alrighty!" Charlie said with a nervous laugh, wishing that she had gathered more information about her hotel's newest guest and their relationship with you before allowing them to see you. "Let's all just relax, and maybe (Y/N) can introduce the two of you to eachother."
You let out a sigh. You loved how sweet Charlie was taking in any sinner, you really did, but sometimes it did more harm than good, usually to no fault of her own. You motioned to your ex, "Lucifer, this is my ex." Then you motioned to your boyfriend, "This is Lucifer. King of Hell...And my boyfriend." The last part felt almost weird to say, the surrealness of dating the Hell's king and the man sometimes known as the devil himself finally setting in.
Your ex only laughed in response, earning an angry, growling-like noise from Lucifer. You grabbed his hand, squeezing it in an attempt to calm him down which only partially worked.
"There's no way this little guy is Hell's king! He's so fucking short. I really thought you had better standards in who you date, babe."
"Fuck you." You hissed, anger bubbling up inside of you as you felt yourself slipping into your more demonic form. "He's certainly better than you ever were." By now the other inhabitants of the hotel had gathered around, some more entertained than anything, while others, particularly Vaggie, were preparing for the brawl that was surely about to happen.
"Woah! Look at the time." Charlie intervened. "It's getting pretty late, why don't we all start heading to bed?" You responded only by turning around and heading towards your room, in desperate need of calming yourself down. Lucifer followed behind you, the walk to your room quiet with no words spoken.
You opened your door, nearly throwing it open in your still-present anger, before flopping down onto the bed with a loud, frustrated groan. You looked to the side, taking notice of the way Lucifer refused to look at you, his arms crossed.
"Honey?" No answer. "Love?" No answer, yet again. "Luci?" That did the trick. He always melted whenever you called him that.
"Your ex is fucking annoying."
You let out a small chuckle at his bluntness, a smile making its way onto your face. "They are, Luci. That's why they're my ex." You sat up, pulling him down onto the bed with you, kissing him, causing both of you to relax, some built-up tension leaving.
"You're all mine, aren't you?" He questioned, already knowing your answer. "Mine to love. Mine to claim." His mouth moved to your neck, sharp teeth grazing the skin, and you let out a soft moan as he began to nibble and kiss at the skin, his teeth leaving a mark you were sure he'd take pride in.
Your head fell to the side, giving him more access to your neck as you took his hat off, throwing it to the side, your fingers running through his hair as he continued to mark you.
"I'm going to ruin you for anyone else. You'll only ever want me." He whispered, lips returning to yours in a fervent kiss. Your lips remained locked together, only occasionally parting for a few seconds so you could help rid each other of the clothes that separated you from what you both craved.
He moved between your legs, the tip of his hardened cock teasing at your wet entrance. Usually, you two would've done more before the main act, but you two were more than ready to indulge in the other right now.
"Don't be a tease, Lucifer." You purred, spreading your legs wider. "Can't you feel how wet I am? How ready I am for you to fuck me senseless?"
He smirked before finally slipping in, biting his lip to prevent an almost embarrassingly loud moan that threatened to surface at the way you felt wrapped around him. He has been in heaven before, and he could say with confidence that being deep inside of you felt better than anything his former home could've offered him.
He began to thrust, his pace starting slow, still teasing you. He wanted you to beg, and you already knew it.
"Faster, harder, please, Lucifer—" You pleaded, giving in to what he wanted from you. "I know you want to pound me into this bed, Lucifer—Ah! Fuck!—" His pace sped up, and the sound of hips meeting yours in rapid succession filled the room. "Fuckfuckfuck–yes!"
"You always feel so fucking good." He growled, wings slipping out as he lost himself in the ecstasy that was your pussy. You ran your fingers through the red and white feathers, and he let out a pleasured whine at the feeling. His wings had always been sensitive.
"Fuck me—Let them all know I'm yours!" You cried out, losing yourself in the feeling of his cock fucking you with quick, deep strokes. You gripped the sheets in your hands, back arching as he angled himself just right, hitting your sweet spot head on.
"Mine. Mine to ruin, mine to fuck, and mine to fill up. All mine." His hands found yours, pinning them down against the bed as he began to fuck you even harder, his climax nearing. You wrapped your legs around his waist, pulling him in closer.
"I'm gonna cum–You're going to make me cum so hard–"
"Then fucking do it." He demanded with a growl. "Cum around my cock like the little slut you are for me." You came around him, cunt spasming as your orgasm coursed through you. Lucifer's wings fluttered as he followed you soon after, filling you up with his hot cum.
You pulled him down into a sweet kiss once your climax subsided, cupping his face in your hands. God, you loved him more than anything. The kiss ended after a good moment, leaving you both to bask in your shared, post-coital bliss.
"You lost a few feathers," You observed with a giggle, holding one up. He chuckled warmly, lying beside you. You rested your head on his chest, enjoying the peacefulness of the moment. You'd have to deal with your ex in the morning, but for now, you were both satisfied with knowing that you were entirely Lucifer's, and that's how you'd always want it to be.
4K notes · View notes
luveline · 2 months
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I absolutely adore your Spencer x Hotch!sister fics! <3 Can we possibly see the dynamics if it were switched? A Hotch x Spencer's Older Sister fic, pretty please? But no worries if not! Thank you, hope you have a good day!
Was Spencer’s sister always this shy? Hotch can’t remember (and he can’t stop himself from flirting, just a little). fem, 1.4k
“Reid?” Hotch asks. 
Spencer grins at his phone. 
“Reid.” Hotch clears his throat. “Spencer.” 
Spencer puts his phone down on the desk, but he doesn’t seem to have heard Hotch either way. When he realises Hotch is standing by his desk, he perks up. “Hotch, can I ask a favour?” 
Hotch had been about to ask Spencer a favour, but it’s fine. “Sure.” 
“Uh, my sister is supposed to meet me for lunch in half an hour, but she doesn’t really like restaurants and I’m– me. Do you think she could come to the office?” he asks. 
“Sure, Reid. That’s fine, she just needs a visitor card.” 
Hotch can’t remember the last time he saw you. Probably when Reid first started tailing Gideon a few years ago, when you’d made the trip from Vegas to Quantico to see how he was settling. It was a brief introduction, and, while you may possess a few more practical graces than your brother, you were far shyer at the time. You didn’t mind shaking Hotch’s hand, but you struggled to maintain eye contact after. 
You don’t look much like your brother for reasons he’s never cared to ask, as Hotch has never placed much value on how family comes about. He doubts Spencer does either. But you stay in Vegas with your mother, and Spencer sees you three times a year. Birthdays and Christmas. And today, apparently. 
“What’s the occasion?” Hotch asks. 
Spencer smiles again. “I think she’s gonna move here, with me.” 
“Yeah?” Hotch isn’t the prying boss, but he’s a nosy friend. “Everything okay?” 
“Things are great, I mean.” Spencer has the expression of someone deciding what they can and can’t say. Eventually his eyes clear, and Hotch feels satisfied at the realisation that trust has settled tightly between them. “When I decided my mom needed help, Y/N, she hated that, and maybe she resented me, but– I used to worry she hated me, but she doesn’t.” 
“I don’t think she could,” Hotch says easily. 
Spencer nods. Whether he agrees is up for debate, though. “If t’s finally hit her that mom’s sick forever, so she’s feeling out her options.” 
“That must be a hard thing to realise.” 
“Yeah. But things really are great, she’s here now, her stuff is coming tomorrow, and– and maybe she’ll stay for a while.” 
Hotch likes excitement on Reid (when it doesn’t impede their most important work, that is). Truthfully, there’s so much to worry about that Hotch can’t admit to worrying about Reid as much in recent years, and yet he’s relieved to hear that there will be more Reid’s in a hundred mile radius. 
“I’m glad,” Hotch says honestly. “She’s more than welcome here. If she can cope with the photographs in the conference room, the round table is all yours.” 
Hotch retreats to his office and forgets about it for a while, submerged in his own lunch and a certain seven year old’s birthday planning. Jack wants a clown, and a cake with Cars, and he really wants a bounce house. Which is great, but Jack decided he wanted the bounce house last night, and his party is at the end of the week. Hotch makes a bunch of phone calls and finally gets to take a victory lap forty five minutes later. 
He steps out of his office, enticed by the sound of laughter. Spencer laughs like he’s surprised ninety percent of the time, and yours is no different. It’s clear to the listening ear who taught Spencer how to laugh. 
“I love it, I don’t ever want to hear a bad word about it,” you say through peels of it, a breathy, smiley warmth to you as a chair creaks from within the conference room, “and I mean that. Please don’t tell me any facts.” 
“I know so many you’d like to hear!” 
“I don’t doubt it, but please, as a favour? You can tell me about everything else.” 
“Processed cheeses–”
Hotch turns the corner as you put down a sandwich. “Okay, fine. I’m done, are you happy?” you ask, your smile fading into a more polite one as you meet Hotch’s eyes. 
“I didn’t get to say anything.” 
“Some things are better left unsaid,” Hotch says. He doesn’t interrupt, only says it into the quiet, and he doesn’t bother with fanfare. It’s just to alert Spencer of his presence. “Y/N,” Hotch adds, “hello. It’s good to see you.” 
He’s alarmed by your reaction —your eyes widen in your seat, hands hidden beneath your thighs, and your lips part ever so slightly. “Agent Hotchner,” you say softly, almost weakly. 
He’s not that intimidating, is he?
“I’m sorry to interrupt,” he says. 
“You’re not interrupting, I was just telling her about the dangers of processed cheese. They’re so irregularly salty that the sodium has to be marked as a cause of heart disease on FDA approved packaging for the service industry,” Spencer says. 
“I’m sure some every now and then won’t hurt,” Hotch says, attempting to offer you a friendly smile. “Spencer tells me you’re staying here for a while, that’s great. How are you liking the weather? It must be a change from Nevada?” 
You look peculiarly hot. “It’s different,” you agree.
Voices ring from the bullpen. 
Spencer stands up. You stand with him, but Spencer says, “Sorry, is that Morgan? He said I have to go and get him when you’re here.” 
“Spencer–”
Spencer’s already leaving. “He threatened me, actually,” he’s saying, more to himself than either of you as he departs. 
You wring your hands. 
Hotch worries his brows are giving him away. You’re acting strangely, but maybe he’s too much. He is a special agent, sometimes the other parents at Jack’s school get antsy around him like they’re worried he can tell they haven’t paid their last parking fine. Maybe you’ve a secret crime you’ve committed. 
He watches you more closely, to your flustering. 
No crime, Hotch thinks, but a secret. Even from Spencer. 
“So how’s your day, Agent Hotchner?” you ask softly. 
It’s actually quite sweet, the way you say it. Your nerves are cute. 
“Busy.” The expected answer. “I’ve been trying to plan a birthday party between paperwork.” 
“For Jack?” 
He smiles with more gentleness. “Yes, for Jack.” 
“He was, um, a newborn, when we last met. Just a couple of weeks old, I think. How old is he turning now?” 
“Seven.” 
You breathe out. “Wow. Seven years.” 
Seven years, and your crush on him remains. That’s what he’d forgotten —when you visited Spencer at the time, even Gideon had mentioned your frazzled, almost dizzy disposition whenever Hotch was around. And Gideon tended to focus narrowly on work at work, so Hotch had known he wasn’t making it up. 
At the time it had been cute, but awkward too, and infeasible. He’d been dedicatedly married and in love with his Haley. And if he weren’t, your age gap might’ve been a little non-functioning, Hotch well into his thirties, and you a fresh twenty-five. 
Today you’re older, and more beautiful. Something about you has shifted, a blossoming into your features, and Hotch actually has the ability to notice it now. 
Your Spencer’s sister, he remembers suddenly. Probably not a woman he should flirt with, some subtle compliment lost on his tongue. 
“You look the same,” you say. 
He laughs. “That’s kind and untrue. I’m getting old.” 
The look you give him then is a shock and a pit, long the long forgotten twist of butterflies. “No,” you say, looking down at your hands, “I wouldn’t say that.” 
“What would you say?” he asks. 
You’re saved —poor girl, he doesn’t know what he was thinking, you can barely hold your head up— as Morgan bounds up the stairs and into the conference room. He gathers you for a hug as though he knows you better than he does, and Hotch loses sight of your face. 
Unknown to him and unseen, Morgan’s greeting is white noise. Why does he talk like that? you think to yourself desperately. He’s asking you all those questions with this weight to them, and he’s so calm! I’m going back to Vegas. 
“How long are you staying?” Morgan asks. 
You laugh weakly and accidentally catch Hotch’s eye, who smiles at you nicely. 
“Oh, I don’t know. A couple of weeks, maybe.” 
Longer, if you have reason. 
1K notes · View notes
anashins · 10 months
Text
Five Times a Day
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Pairing: Jaehyun x You
Genre: angst, romance, smut
Word Count: 3.7k
Summary: After Jaehyun's ex drops the fact that they have once done it five times a day, you are eager to keep this record up.
A/N: Retroactive jealousy is real and this is me processing this problem. Maybe some of you can relate - remember: We're in this together and are stronger than our insecurities!
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You sipped on your smoothie, barely listening to your friends who were excitedly talking across each other. Under usual circumstances, you would have been able to enjoy this gathering among you girls, but today… not at all. 
In fact, you were in a sulk. And it was all because of a guest from a past you had deemed forgotten already.
“By the way…” Said guest suddenly turned to you with a feigned, overly sweet smile. “How is Jaehyun?”
You rolled your eyes, refusing to look into the face of the girl who had just asked you this question. You had known she would eventually come up with this topic. After all, your boyfriend, Jaehyun, was her ex boyfriend. Justifiably his ex, though!
She had gone behind his back and cheated on him with his friend. It had been you who had mended his broken heart with no ulterior motives in the beginning, but after that cruel woman had moved away, it had evolved into something that the both of you had underestimated.
You had given him time, treated him with nothing other than patience and understanding, until one day, he had been able to move on with you who had no intention of hurting him in the same manner ever again.
“He’s perfectly fine, we’re so happy,” was your equally overly sweet reply.
Your best friend’s nudge into your side with her elbow pulled you out of your sulking attitude as she was silently begging you to get a grip of yourself. You just shrugged, reminding her that you had only tagged along because you were nosy and wanted to boast, and that you had no intention of being friendly. You just couldn’t have missed this opportunity to see how she was doing, no matter how much you resented her.
Jaehyun’s ex had been in your friend group back then and was now in the city for a few days, so everyone had accepted her invitation to meet up to reminisce about the old times - including you and your big ego. You slowly regretted it, even though you had only come to brag to her how much happier he was with you. It was just so exhausting to be fake-friendly.
But to prove to your best friend that you were ready to compromise, you added sharply with triumph in your voice, “We live together now.”
“Oh, I’m so happy for you!” the ex’s voice echoed through the café as she clapped into her hands. “I also have a new boyfriend with whom I live with!”
The other girls congratulated her, but you couldn’t bring yourself to do so as well. All you could think of was whether that guy was also a poor soul she would soon destroy. That was until she mentioned something else that only you could probably hear.
“Now that we live together, we do it like five times a day.” She chuckled, lowered her voice and leaned in to you. “Jaehyun has been able to do just as much. Say, does he still live up to it? You must for sure know.”
You resented her so much.
____
First
You woke up way before Jaehyun when the sun shone right into your face as you had forgotten to pull the curtains together the night before.
It was almost 7 in the morning, and soon, your alarm would go off so that you would only see each other again later that evening when you came back home from work. You were determined to beat the clock before that would happen.
With much caution, you lifted the blanket and crawled under the duvet to Jaehyun’s side of the bed. He only groaned when you accidentally leaned on his shin, but you were still able to settle on his legs under the blanket without waking him up fully. 
You reached out your hand and stroked the small mound under his pajama bottoms. It didn’t take long for that mound to turn into a firm bulge and for Jaehyun to react to your stroking with his thighs moving against your palm.
You didn't know whether he was awake yet or not from under the covers, but you liked the thought of this exact uncertainty. To push this act further, you hooked your fingers into the waistband of his bottoms and dragged the fabric downwards to the point where you could get a hold of his member and pull it out entirely.
Your fingers wrapped around Jaehyun’s length and you started moving them along his shaft until it stood nearly parallelly to his stomach. Sitting yourself up to be able to tug your own panties down, you shuffled forwards and guided his tip to your entrance.
When you slowly sank down onto him, you heard a loud moan from the other side of the blanket that was still covering you. Tight hands gripping onto your bum when you had taken him in fully, confirmed to you that your boyfriend was now awake - and ready for whatever was to come.
“Good morning,” you whispered, your head now peeking out from under the duvet.
Your boyfriend was still lying on his back with his eyes closed, but you still perceived his sensual and exciting expression as he licked over his lips and groggily fluttered his lids open.
With a grin, Jaehyun greeted you hoarsely, “‘morning.”
Your palms were placed flat onto his chest as the blanket slipped over your shoulders along your back and revealed your upper body that was only covered in your silken top. To Jaehyun, this was a sight he couldn’t get enough of, jolting him entirely awake now.
You put your weight on your forearms, just enough for you to lift your hips and come down at him again. Not much later, your moans filled the entire room, sunlight dancing across your skins on whichever part was currently in the right angle as you bobbed up and down on him.
Your back arched, your hair falling over your shoulder blades in long, silken streaks as the strands simultaneously moved to the rhythm you applied to Jaehyun’s groin. Not much later, your skin was glistening with sweat and you fell limply on your boyfriend’s chest as you had run out of strength.
Putting his arms around you, Jaehyun hurried you along until you bit into his shoulder to suppress your scream as you shook in his embrace. Shortly after, when you slowly calmed down, it was his turn. With his fingers entangled in your hair, he whispered sweet nothings into your ear, faltering between every syllable as he came.
You had never doubted that Jaehyun loved you very much. You had been very sure that he loved you even more than when he was the happiest with his ex-girlfriend.
But now, you weren’t quite so sure anymore. 
Not even when he took his time and risked being late to work just to cuddle with you in the aftermath.
____
Second
“What are you doing here?”
Jaehyun looked at you with very much surprise from across his desk when you closed the door behind you. You had visited him a few times at his workplace already, to bring him food or quickly say hello when you had been in the neighborhood - but never with such an intention.
The fabric of your trenchcoat felt cold on your skin as you wore nothing underneath other than the lingerie that you had actually wanted to save for your anniversary celebration. But until then, you had decided, you would buy a new set and use this one for this certain occasion.
Jaehyun couldn’t believe his eyes when you opened the coat’s belt across your waist and flashed him the sexiest set of red underwear that he had hopefully ever seen in his life. You physically watched his jaw drop and him taking off and then putting on again his glasses just to make sure that what he was currently witnessing was, indeed, real.
“Today is not my birthday, right?” You saw him gulp as his Adam’s apple moved along his neck, and you had to suppress a chuckle catching him so off guard. “Then I must be dreaming.”
“You’re not,” you answered and approached him in your heels that were also new. “Today is just your lucky day.”
“Then can every day be my lucky day?”
When you stood right in front of him after he had come forward from his seat, you let the trenchcoat slide down your shoulders, revealing the new bra fully, and your boyfriend couldn’t take his eyes off of you once again. 
“You are so beautiful,” he whispered before his head disappeared between your breasts. “I can’t get enough of you.”
“Then show me,” you challenged him. “Show me how much you want me. Right here and now.”
… and not her, you added silently in your mind, but pushed this intrusive thought right aside, because you wanted to live in this moment with Jaehyun and no one else.
“Very well,” he agreed and helped you take off the trenchcoat.
You were allowed to keep wearing your lingerie when Jaehyun grabbed you by your buttocks and placed your legs around either side of his hips just so that he could carry you. With one swift motion, he had turned you to his desk and kept you in place with one arm while the other reached out and threw everything in his reach from the desk onto the floor. 
Then, he placed you on the surface and parted your thighs with his hips. The moment he loosened his tie was the moment you lost it too, because, once again, it hit you out of nowhere how perfect your boyfriend was and that you actually shouldn’t care who had been with before and what he had done with that person.
Jaehyun was all yours when he slipped his fingers into your lace panties and pushed them into you to collect the fluids inside of you as you had gotten so wet already. He was all yours, when he dragged his hand along your folds and caused you to shudder with this motion only as they reached your clit. 
And he was also all yours when you couldn’t bear it for much longer and put your heels up on either side right on top of the desk to give him better access to enter you.
You were laying flat on the surface with your elbows propped up for support so that you could watch him thrust right into you. Jaehyun’s hair swung with each push and grew damp over time on the tips that touched his sweaty forehead. His fingers were still buried into your upper thighs so that no thrust would go astray, and when he looked up, you encountered this hungry look in his eyes.
He was long not done, and you only hoped that his short lunch break was enough for what he had still in store for you.
And as you were finally letting yourself go too, lying back down on the desk and moaning his name just loud enough to not to travel to the other offices, you wondered if he had done something like this before just by the way he knew what to do and how to enjoy it.
____
Third
You had set up a fancy dinner for Jaehyun later that evening. After having surprised him at his office, you had gone straight back to your own workplace and finished earlier to buy and prepare his favorite food.
By the time he was home, you had the appetizer and steak with side dishes ready, and even though you had been in a hurry to fix dinner, you were pretty impressed with how everything had turned out. After all, today, everything had to be perfect for this mission.
“Are you sure it’s not my birthday or another important date that I forgot about?”
Jaehyun raised a brow when he saw that you had set up the whole atmosphere with fancy crockery, cutlery and even lightened up candles. Usually, on weekdays, when you both had to work, you just threw something easy and light together and ate on the couch in front of the TV.
“Can’t I just do something nice for my boyfriend when I have the day off?”
“I mean… I’m not complaining. But this is the third nice thing you’re doing for me today. What did I do to deserve this?”
You put your hands around his neck and shook your head. “You’re just being you. Isn’t that enough.”
You got on your tiptoes to kiss him and were already looking forward to serving him dessert. And with “dessert” you didn’t mean ice cream or cake, because you had not prepared such. With “dessert” you meant having Jaehyun right under you at your mercy not even an hour later.
“Stop, stop!” Jaehyun breathed and stretched out his hand to gently lay it on the top of your head.
With a slurping sound, you let go of him and looked up to your boyfriend who was spread out on the couch underneath you. 
“You don’t like it?” you worried, because Jaehyun actually never said no to getting head. Again, you wondered what you did wrong and if he had ever said no to his ex. You bet not.
He cupped your face and softly pulled you up to him so that you were now hovering over his chest. “That’s not what I mean,” he grinned and kissed your smudged lips. “You did so much for me today, let me do something for you too.”
Not much later, you were a writhing, whiny mess, legs locked between Jaehyun’s head while he licked you like you were his literal dessert after this feast. You had cum twice in a row already and were thinking that if he wouldn’t stop now, you wouldn’t have much energy for the real deal soon.
“Already out of breath?” 
“Please… I just want you inside of me,” you begged.
“Very well.”
He took you on all fours from behind this time, fingers entangled in your hair and pulling you back every now and then to either kiss you or groan lewd words into your ear that made you blush slightly. In no way would one assume your boyfriend had this side to him if one were to meet him on the streets. 
How lucky you were. 
And other girls before that too, apparently.
But again, you pushed that thought aside when Jaehyun smacked your cheek and you let out a shriek that blended with your orgasm in the exact same moment. Pain and pleasure became indistinguishable, and that made it even more exciting as you experienced a high that only seldomly occurred. 
When you laid with your sweaty bodies chest to chest, you came to the conclusion that it probably truly didn’t matter what had ever been before you when the present was so beautiful. 
You didn’t want your insecurities to get the better of you, but your boyfriend was so perfect that you constantly wondered if one day, he would have enough of you if you couldn’t give the best like he deserved.
____
Fourth
“No.”
Your heart sank and you directly pulled your dressing gown close again. Underneath it, you wore a negligee that only rarely got put into use, but for the fourth time today, you wanted to present it to Jaehyun when he returned from the bathroom.
You only had two more times to go, you assumed you could get it done right now.
Your disappointment and shock were very visibly written all over your face though, and immediately, your boyfriend started to apologize.
“Look…” He seated himself next to you on the bed and looked at you with apologetic eyes. “Don’t beat yourself up over this! I really appreciate everything you did today, but it was a long day overall for me and I have to get up early again tomorrow. I just can’t keep up anymore today. It was great three times, but I’m physically at my end too and I really need to sleep soon.”
You didn’t want to say it. You truly didn’t. But your impulsive part had gotten the upper hand as all your feelings that you had been suppressing throughout the day boiled down to this one sentence,
“I bet you didn’t say that to your ex when you did it five times a day.”
For an unusually long time, Jaehyun stayed quiet and you feared that you had sabotaged your relationship at this point. 
“I knew there was something up with you,” he eventually said. “You shouldn’t have gone to that gathering, even though the other girls are still friends with her.”
“But I did, because I’m nosy and foolish.” You paused. “Are you mad now?”
“Yes.” Your heart dropped, but before you could defend yourself, Jaehyun continued, “I’m mad because you have let her confuse and make you question our relationship based on… what?”
Ruefully, you confessed, “She said that you had sex five times a day.” You sensed how he repressed laughter that was deeper than usual, so he wasn’t making fun. “What is it? Is it not true?”
Honestly, perhaps you should have asked Jaehyun before reacting blindly out of impulse, because after all, this cheating girl was a liar. But sadly, he dismissed your glimpse of hope.
“We did.” Jaehyun’s head dropped at the same moment as your heart. “This is true.”
“Oh…” 
You knew the person you should be angry at was yourself, not Jaehyun or his ex. You hadn’t been romantically involved at that time, it had nothing, absolutely nothing to do with you. But you couldn’t help but to compare yourself to her over and over again. 
What was wrong with you? Why couldn’t you just switch this off? Why was there no button connected to your feelings?
Something warm suddenly touched your hand, and it was Jaehyun’s, taking yours into his. You didn’t dare to look up, that was how ashamed you felt for yourself. 
“It was only one time,” he started calmly. “There was a snowstorm outside, so it was dangerous for her to go home. She stayed an entire day and night, that was when it happened. And do you know why it happened?”
You shrugged. You were unsure whether you actually wanted to know all the details to feed your insecurities even more.
“Don’t worry, the answer won’t be as you expect.” Jaehyun squeezed your hands and continued with a patient, tender tone, “The reason wasn’t because I found her more beautiful or hotter than you. Believe me, you are the only one for me. I cannot even look at other women and not think ‘Wow, I got the most beautiful girl out of all the girls in the world. She’s so perfect, I’m so lucky!’” Your cheeks were burning, but you kept listening diligently. “The reason was because we literally had nothing to talk about.”
Now, you lifted your head and faced your boyfriend who encouragingly smiled at you. He was sincere, you saw it clearly in his eyes. “What do you mean?”
“I mean that whenever we spent so much time with each other, we never had something to talk about. We had absolutely no common interests or topics of which we felt the need to engage in. The only attraction we had was a physical one, so when we were forced to stay with each other so long, there was nothing else that we could do.”
Jaehyun let go of your fingers and wrapped his hands around your waist instead to pull you into his warm lap, and you let him.
"Absolutely nothing?” you wanted to make sure. This indeed surprised you.
He chuckled ironically. “Yes, absolutely nothing.”
“But we always talk non stop.”
“I know.” You felt his full lips pressing into your cheek and smiled. “We are not only physically connected, but emotionally as well. Isn’t that beautiful? Do you know how much that is worth and that some people seek for a connection like ours an entire lifetime? I enjoy physical contact with you just as much as our conversations and laughter. There is no need to fill a void, because there is none in the first place.”
You had never thought that Jaehyun felt like that and it touched your heart very deeply. “When I heard her saying this, I was worried you would soon be bored with me if I couldn’t keep up.”
“No, don’t ever think that!” Jaehyun drew you close to his chest and you laid your head on his shoulder. “Our love came unexpectedly for each of us, and I think we both had to learn that the right love was calm and steady, not these highs and lows with many fights. This is how it’s supposed to be, don’t let it make you feel unsure because you’re not used to it too. We’re here now, we shouldn’t look back.”
Hearing this from him set your mind at ease. It made many things better that were here temporarily, but you were also aware that in order to fight any doubts you were holding against your relationship, you had to fight your inner demons first. 
It couldn’t be done in a day, but you would work hard, taking one step at a time and just believe in your boyfriend who assured you every day in many ways that his feelings were true and unwavering, no matter how big the demon had grown at this point. 
“I love you, Jaehyun.”
“Of course I love you too.” He chuckled. “You make me laugh, you defend me, you fight me, you challenge me, and whenever I’m at my wit’s end, you bring me back to life. This is worth so much more and there is no one else I can ever imagine being with again. To me, you’re perfect.”
“Funny,” you whispered as you felt him pressing a kiss onto your parting. “I always think that about you too.”
There was no need for a fourth or fifth time.
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princessbrunette · 4 months
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dbf!rafe thought he was doing a pretty good job at pretending he didn’t care too much about you. but it was coming to the late afternoon, and he’d driven past you wandering around town on your own wearing one of those stupid little mini skirts you’re crazy about and he had to do his duty and command you come with him. for your safety of course. he’d hate if some sick older guy got his hands on you.
“get in. c’mon.” he’s already acting irritable with you and it only spurs you on to act mischievous.
“why so glum, hm?” you pout, letting a small giggle slip through as you fasten your belt — the friend of your fathers glancing around the area briefly to see if anyone had seen his bosses daughter climb into his car before zipping off.
“what’d i tell you last time i saw you just— just walking around asking for trouble?” he berates and he’s not even sure why he’s so wound up. you just got him so pent up and touchy that he always found himself being this way with you.
“asking for trouble? mr cameron i was just hanging out.” you laugh, stretching your legs and going to rest your feet on his dashboard. he shoves your legs off, sending you a scalding glare.
“in that little skirt? yeah i wasn’t born yesterday, alright— you were probably off meeting guys.” he grumbles and you turn your head to him, heart fluttering at the jealous tone he had failed to conceal.
“oh no, not hanging out with guys my own age… that would be the most awful thing in the world, right?” you sark, and he resents the way he can hear the pretty smile in your voice without even turning his attention away from the road. he huffs out a scoff, shaking his head as he pulls up to the traffic light.
“told your old man i’d look out for you, right so — so i am just telling you that you shouldn’t be wandering around meeting guys dressed like a hooker. i know how guys brains work, okay — i am a guy. s’why i’m taking your ass home where you can’t get into any of that shit.” he rants, and before you can complain about him calling you a hooker your attention is caught by his promise to bring you home and you shoot up in your seat.
“no, please. just— anywhere else. not home.” you suddenly sound serious, and he nearly misses the stoplight turning green to glance at you in confusion.
“and why the hell not?” he drawls and suddenly you’re a lot more quiet. he raises his eyebrows waiting for a response.
“i’m fighting with my parents. i just… i don’t want to see them yet.” you sigh, staring at your manicure in your lap. as much as he wanted to teach you a lesson and drag you back into the house to your father, he knew what it was like to have a rocky relationship with his parents. because of this he sighs after his slight hesitation and turns in the direction away from your house.
“ah… shit, alright fine. the fuck do you wanna go then? gotta drop you somewhere, alright?” he relents and you beam.
“really? thanks mr cameron.” your elated expression calms itself into a pur as you lean across the gear stick and press a kiss to his cheek. he clenches his jaw.
“watch it.”
to this you respond with a giggle and he relaxes a little, knowing he had a little more time with you.
“where do you wanna go then? haven’t got all day, kid m’not a fuckin’ taxi.”
“hmm, your place?” you’re quick with your answer, almost like you had it planned. he’d given in a few times, let you have your way with him even though he knew it put his career on the line — and he told himself and you that this could go on no longer.
he huffs out a laugh, scratching at his cheek and shaking his head, choosing to ignore the suggestion. your bottom lip curls over at this, frowning a little.
“raaafe.” you whine and he resists an eye roll.
“what you’re — you’re serious about that shit?”
“mhm… i missed you…” you coo, and he feels your warm body lean across the centre console again, a clawed hand finding his thigh as you speak into his ear. “c’mon dad.” you groan and he feels a hot rush of blood fly through him at the nickname. god you were sick.
“don’t fuckin’ call me that.” he turns into his driveway at tannyhill, parking up infront of the house haphazardly before turning off the car and not making any move to get out.
“just wanna play a little bit.” you complain, kissing down his white shirt leaving lipgloss prints that he’d soon complain about down the expensive material as he watches you with parted lips, feeling your hot breath fan over his hardening crotch.
“well if you’re gonna suck me off just fuckin’ do it alright. don’t wanna hear that shrill ass little voice unless you’re tellin’ me how good that shit tastes. c’mon.”
you couldn’t help but obey.
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cosmicjoke · 11 months
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You know what gets me too about Levi?
He's just such a sweetheart. He really, really is.
He has such a tough, intimidating exterior. He is tough and intimidating, forged that way from a life of hardship. But his heart is as gentle as they come.
The last shot of him, handing out candy to all those little kids. The way he saved Ramzi from that angry mob. The way he worked with Historia to relocate all the children from the Underground above, to give them better lives.
Levi's compassion toward children is demonstrated again and again, and really exemplifies his compassion overall. People that treat children kindly, that are so aware of children and their worth, and acknowledge them and their worth, are the most genuinely good people.
And when you think about Levi's own childhood, the brutality and loneliness and poverty of it, it makes his kindness and compassion toward them all the more remarkable. His own, deprived childhood could have turned him callous and cruel, unable to care for others out of the desperation to survive himself, but it didn't. Instead, Levi remained and remains exceptionally kind and caring. He remains more deeply compassionate and generous and selfless than anyone.
That last shot of him handing out candy to those children, helping them to regain even a semblance of a normal childhood, to experience some of the joy and innocence of childhood again, after the trauma of what they've been through, exemplifies who Levi is best of all. He isn't wallowing in self-pity, or lamenting on what he's lost (and he's lost more than anyone). He isn't feeling sorry for himself for losing his mobility, or being scarred and disfigured. He isn't drowning in his grief or despair over the friends and family he's lost. He isn't embittered or negative, he isn't angry or cynical. He isn't self-absorbed, or wrapped up in resentment that others have what he never did.
No, instead, he's out there, on the ground, bringing light into the lives of children who still have a chance to escape that darkness that consumed his own childhood, and the vast majority of his adulthood too. He's out there doing his best to protect them from that despair, to give them a chance at a happy childhood.
This is what I mean when I call Levi the most selfless character. Because he is. He doesn't begrudge others having what he was always denied. Rather, he does all he can to ensure they never experience the deprivation he did. He does all he can to give them what he was so cruelly robbed of.
And all this after he's already given everything. When he owes no one anything.
He really is an absolute sweetheart. He's just the sweetest man.
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toxicanonymity · 11 months
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Midnight Snack.
3.4k slasher!Joel x f!reader
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slasher Joel masterlist | spotify SUMMARY: Joel has dinner with his Mom, then visits you. A/N: Shoutout to @iamasaddie for the master list mood board magnets, @gasolinerainbowpuddles for the edit and divider, fridge magnet anon ask, @thesummerpetrichor , anyone I'm forgetting?  WARNINGS: I8+ dubcon unsafe p in v, creampie, light somnophilia, choking, lewd degradation, home intrusion, manual restraint, spitting, toxic parental issues, angst/insecurity, changes POV, NO Y/N.  
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“I said I’m good, Ma,” Joel grumbles as his mom puts another heaping spatula of casserole on his plate anyway. He sighs and pushes it around with his fork. 
“What’s got ya down, hun?”  
“Nothin’.”
“It’s a girl, ain’t it?” She smiles. “Knew it. Last time ya were here, ya had that glow," she nods, then registers his sullen face again.  "It's okay, hun. Whatever it is, you'll work it out.". 
He hasn't stopped thinking about you since he was there. When he drives, when he showers, when he goes to bed, when he jacks off—he sees the desire in your eyes when you’re pinned against the counter. He sees your dripping hole stretched around his fist. He thinks about you every time he uses his wrench. Still smells like your filthy cunt. 
"Tell me 'bout her,” his mom urges. 
“Can't,” Joel mumbles. “Don’t got a girl.” 
His mom looks at him knowingly. She always sees right through him. He doesn’t like how close they are, but in a way, she’s his only friend.  He fails to suppress a little smile, then looks down shyly at his plate and finally takes a bite.  
She asks,  “How’d ya meet?” 
Joel gives her a half-serious cautionary look and keeps chewing. 
“Work?” his mom prods. 
Joel swallows, nods, and takes a sip of milk. “Gave'r a ride.”
Two rides, really. Although you took the second one all on your own. And damn, it was good. He shifts in his seat. 
“Well, great,” his mom lights up. “When ya gonna see her again?” She dabs her mouth with a cloth napkin and stands up. 
“I dunno, Ma. . .She’s too good for me.”
She huffs, adjusts her glasses, then walks over. She playfully whips him on the shoulder with the fabric napkin, then puts her finger in his face. “Don’t you ever say that. No one’s too good for my boy.” She takes his glass to the kitchen and pours him some more milk, then sits back down at the table. 
“already left me once,” Joel grumbles.
His Mom’s face falls, then sours.  
“Then she’s not worth your time." She scoffs. Or anyone else’s." 
“She’s different, Ma," he mutters deadpan, then quieter, he adds, "Sometimes I think she likes me," with the slightest lift of his brow.  
Mrs. Miller's eyebrows shoot all the way up. "Well, she should!"
"'mixed signals." He’s saying too much, but he can’t stop. It’s not like he has anyone else to talk to.
"Bring'er for dinner," she suggests.
"Ain't like that," he sulks. "We don't-" He cuts himself off and sighs, sitting back in his chair. He puts his napkin on his plate. "Shouldn't'a mentioned it," he mumbles. 
His mom reaches across the table for his hand, and he gives it to her.  He looks at the delicate, paper-thin skin covering the veins on her hand. It makes him sad. He wants to bring a girl home. He wants to make his Mom happy. He doesn't come by enough.  She must be so lonely.  And he's the one who. . .no, his father deserved it, he reminds himself for the millionth time in his life. He didn’t love them, his mom said. Resentment begins to overtake his guilt. He doesn’t want to feel sorry for her. He steels himself and decides to feel nothing. 
"Look at me, Joel."  She looks him in the eye. "You're not gonna get a wife like this, honey." Joel swallows and looks down. She continues, "Don't be a quitter. She's yours if you want her." Don’t be a quitter. 
The buzzer for the laundry goes off. Mrs. Miller starts to head to the laundry room, but Joel stops her. "Feel like a loser when ya do my laundry." 
She shakes her head in disapproval and starts clearing the table instead. "My son. . .” she picks up both their plates. ". . .Is not a loser." 
Joel finishes his laundry, watches some tv with her while she knits, then pulls himself away.  His Mom sends him on his way with an old tupperware of casserole. "Go get her," she tells him with a wink.
—-
He wants to make a move.  He wants to fuck you again, but he isn’t sure how.  How do people do it? He doesn't know how to ask you out, or what you'd do together. Every time he thinks about it, he feels stupid, but he does wanna see you.  He wants to be inside you. He wants to make you purr, little sex kitten. 
At this hour, you’re probably out whoring, but he might as well drive by while he’s close.  All your lights are off, but your car is there. Hmm. He can't bring himself to go home. Don’t be a quitter.  He sits in his car at the end of your street. Last time he came over, it went pretty well. You wanted him to fuck you, and he did.  You wanted more, and he gave you more. Then he left before you could leave him. 
He feels like you’re special, but he really only knows a few things about you. Most importantly, you like the danger, you want the thrill, you want his dick, and you sure can take a cock. 
The only thing he can think to do is give you more of what he knows you want. Even if you're asleep, you'll be purring for it as soon as he drags you out of bed and pins you on the floor.  He pictures a knife at your throat. Not a big one, just his switchblade. 
He gets out of his car and adjusts his balls, spreading his feet for a moment. Then he starts walking to your house.  After a few seconds, he goes back to his car for the casserole. Maybe you'll have a midnight snack after he stuffs you full of his cock. He rolls his eyes at himself. That’s stupid. 
—-
There's a lamp with a dying bulb barely flickering on your back patio with a couple of moths fluttering wildly around it. Joel looks into your dark kitchen and scowls at his reflection in the glass. He holds the Tupperware under his elbow and picks the lock with ease. After stepping into your kitchen, he quietly slides the door shut behind him. His boots thud stickily as he takes his first steps on the linoleum. Do you ever mop? He holds his switchblade open in the air.  He’s headed toward the hall where he expects your bedroom is.  He inches through the kitchen--between the counter on his left and the stove on his right, until he gets to your fridge.  
The surface of the fridge is peppered with magnets--souvenirs, letters of the alphabet, bottle openers. It's silly. But a piece of paper catches his eye and he stops dead in his tracks.  It's pinned to the fridge by a "J," and an "X" and an "O." He blinks and squints, but his eyes don't deceive him. It's his drawing of you, legs spread wide open. His chest flutters looking at his sketch of your cunt hung proudly on your fridge. His dick twitches, and he inhales sharply. His mouth is watering.  He dips the tip of his thick pinky between his lips and dribbles a string of saliva on the paper, right between your legs. He tilts his head and admires the way your graphite cunt glistens.
You want him. You really want him. His body relaxes. He closes and pockets his switchblade.  He opens the fridge as quietly as possible and puts the casserole on the top shelf, pausing to survey the scant contents. Mostly condiments. Takeout containers. Beer. Expired orange juice. He closes the fridge. 
The microwave is hanging down from a cabinet to his left. He steps in front of it and bends his knees enough to push back his hair in the reflection. He stands up again, squares his shoulders, then prowls in silence to your bedroom. 
---
The door is open. Of course it is. You want him.  His boots are quieter on your carpet.  He approaches the foot of your bed but doesn't get closer. You're occupying less than half the bed.  You're just as pretty in your sleep. All bundled up. He knew that already. He gets harder, recalling the time he woke you up with his cock inside you. God, you're sexy. How'd he get so lucky that a hot little slut like you wants him so bad?
He goes to the other side of your bed. His side. There’s a chair full of dirty clothes. He sits down on them and takes off his boots.  He stands up again and lowers the zipper of his jumpsuit, pressing down on his bulge to get the zipper over it without snagging. Then he peels the sleeves off and brings it down over his ass and meaty thighs. He lets it pool at his feet and steps out of it. 
He's left wearing a blue soft wash t-shirt, lighter blue striped boxers, and white socks with holes. He takes those socks off too. He approaches your bed, lifts the covers with care, and sees what you're wearing.  You're wearing the shirt–he recognizes its condition.  God damn, you really do want him.  
Joel gradually lets his weight onto your mattress as he slips under the covers. His heart races and his forehead is damp.  His cock is so hard just from being close to you. He lies there perfectly still on his side for a moment, watching your back as you breathe. Then he scoots forward, inch by inch, until his leg hair brushes your bare legs and you jerk in your sleep. 
"Shhh. It's just me," he whispers as he wraps his hulking arm over you.  He spoons you and lightly presses his hard cock against your ass. You moan in your sleep and push back, then he moans. 
You jerk in your sleep again, but this time you don't relax. You startle awake.  You gasp and whimper. Your limbs thrash, and his arm tightens around you. You squeal, and his massive hand covers your mouth.   He wasn't expecting your feisty side, kitten. He came to give you what you want. 
Why don’t you want him anymore?
-----you-----
Pure instinct kicks in when you wake up with someone in your bed. Your heart is pounding, you thrash and  kick with all your might trying to get away. He covers your mouth and repeats “It’s me, sweetheart. God damn.” He sounds confused and irritated at your reaction. His voice is familiar, but it takes you a moment to place it, despite thinking about him all the time in waking life.  It's like your subconscious hasn't caught up with reality, and can you blame it? 
"Would you stop? Damn," he pants, getting more irritated as you continue to struggle and his arm tightens more, compressing your chest.  What did he expect breaking into your house and getting into your bed?
You feel his hard dick press against your loose sleep shorts and get butterflies in your core, even as you continue struggling. He backs up for a moment and the pull of his arm forces you onto your back.  He pins you with his left forearm on your chest and aggressively yanks down your shorts then kicks them all the way off before getting between your legs. His hard cock lays against your clit, separated only by his boxers, and you're throbbing. Your efforts to free yourself get weaker and weaker until you’re just lying there, staring up at him, your chest getting sore under his arm. 
“What are you doing here?” you ask. He doesn’t answer, just breathes heavily. 
He’s scowling down at you with a fine mist of perspiration along his hairline. He presses his cock against your mound again. Over a long moment of silence, an electric charge passes between your eyes and his.  He slightly tilts his head and looks at your mouth. You reach for the back of his neck and feel the cold sweat under your palm as you pull him down, drawing his face to yours. 
Your mouths meet but don't seal, and you find your lips reaching for his, wanting something to hold, something to suck–but he devours you without granting you any bit of control. You whimper as he kisses you hungrily, hard cock throbbing against your aching clit. He kisses you sloppily, biting your lower lip, dragging his tongue across it to the corner where he pauses and presses his teeth into your cheek and grunts with a slow thrust against you. Then he drags his lips and tongue down your jaw as you tilt your chin up.
He latches onto your neck with an "mm" and his hips begin to grind his thick erection against you at a slow rhythm. He grunts and his breath is humid with a moan against your neck before he latches onto it again. You feel the delicate skin bruising under his mouth while your pussy is gushing wet. You tilt your hips and wrap a leg around him. He groans at your slick, throbbing cunt against his cock. 
He murmurs into your neck, “God damn, you’re a slut for my cock,” then chuckles. “Aren’t ya, kitten?”
He lifts his pelvis off you to massage your cunt aggressively with his hand. You whine and he gives a low whistle.  Then he urgently takes his boxers down and you help him, curling a toe into the waistband once his boxers get down to his thighs.  You drag your foot down between his legs to his feet, taking his boxers with you. . He kicks them off the rest of the way. Before he lays his hips back into you, you reach for his balls, longing to feel the heft of them. It sends a bolt of desire through you. Fuck. 
"What's wrong with you?" You ask, but you're really asking yourself.  You’re asking yourself why you've got this sicko in your bed, someone unhinged enough to break into your house not once but twice and all you want is his cock. 
"Me?" He asks. "the fuck is wrong with you?" He wraps a hand around your throat. “Playin’ games with me,” he growls bitterly. “Ya want it, ya don't, ya want it–” you cough under his grip as he reads your eyes, then he whispers, "want it" with a small nod, and takes his hand away.
He notches his tip at your entrance then breathes, "don't ya?--uggghh" As he shoves into you. “Want it, you’ll get it,” he pants as his cock parts your walls. His cock spreads you wide open as he gives you his full length, and you gasp as he bottoms out. He withdraws a few inches and hangs his head to watch you swallow him back up.  
"God damn," he murmurs.  "Forgot how tight ya were before."  Your clit twitches at the thought of the wrench. 
Then his eyes come to your chest and the ripped shirt he gave you. He moans at the sight of your nipple poking through one of the slashes and he covers it with his mouth as he fucks you.  His wide tongue drags under your nipple and wets the curled edges of the slash in the shirt before his lips seal around your nipple.  He brings his hips back and pushes into you again, sucking and moaning into your tit. Your eyes fixate on his triceps nearly bursting out of his sleeves and that’s the first time it hits you that he was already in sleepwear. He undressed and got in bed with you. God, he’s weird. And you. You're. . . You don't know, but your hands are gliding on their own over his muscular back, feeling him flex as he pounds you. 
You find your fingers curling under the bottom hem of his shirt and he reaches one hand behind his back to help you remove it. You can't see much, but when the angle shifts, the moonlight catches enough to tell you his body has really been through it. When his head dips to your neck again you watch his hulking back muscles and see lines whiter than his skin. At least a dozen, overlapping lashes. You run your hand over it and the slight change in texture makes you wince with the confirmation. No telling how old they are. 
On his front, there’s a short straight line near his shoulder and a longer, thinner one on his side, curving around near his v muscle. Your thumb drifts to that one. Joel shivers at the touch, then slams his hips into you harder. You quickly abandon it, sliding your hand up his side, then to his pec. A wicked smile spreads across half his face as your hand runs across his chest. "Y'ain't scared, are ya?" He asks, breathing heavily with his cock dragging heavily in your dripping wet cunt. 
“No.” You thumb his nipple. 
He lowers himself and lets the weight of his middle onto you with a sigh, still railing his length into you. You wrap both legs around him, and he breathes "yeah, mmmgg baby, yeah" as he fucks you deeper. 
Your nipples go fully erect. "Fuck," he breathes when he feels them.  He grinds against your clit as he fucks you, and you feel a climax looming. The thought crosses your mind whether he's going to kill you one of these days and your chest erupts in goosebumps. Your face feels cold. 
As though reading your mind, he says, “don’t whore around on me” He reads your eyes then adds, "n' you'll be fine," with a small nod, a brief smile, and harsh thrust. 
You can't help but crack a smile at the absurdity of it.  The implied monogamy–on your side, at least. When he registers your amusement, his smile fades into a scowl and his eyes turn black. He grabs your jaw, squeezes it open, and spits in your mouth.  He grabs your hand off his chest and pins both your wrists harshly above you, holding them there with one massive hand as he fucks you harder, angrier. He looks down where your bodies meet, and he watches you take his cock again, breathing heavily, sighing and moaning.
Eventually his sour mood subsides, replaced by renewed marvel at your body. "Sure can take a dick." Your hips lift into him, seeking more pressure for your clit, near the edge.  "Didn't bring my wrench." He glances around your bedroom.  You moan at the thought of him shoving something inside you. Your walls twitch, and the deep groan that leaves his mouth is too much.  You grab his ass and pull him deeper using your hands and your legs.
"Fuck, Joel," you breathe, and a new softness spreads across his face. 
His mouth falls open and he whispers, "yeah, sweetheart." You bite your lip and groan as a huge orgasm seizes you. "Yeah," he whispers and his eyes map your face as your walls clench around him. "oh fuck," he pants as you cum on his cock.  "Fuck," he breathes again, "fuckin love this cunt," he looks you in the eye.  "Ohhhh," he groans and begins to pulse inside you. He lowers his face to your neck again and you keep cumming, your body jerking into his. "Yeah, fuck," he manages into your neck as his balls empty into you. "Mmmmm" he thrusts slowly one more time like he can hardly stand the pleasure. 
He pushes himself back up to look at you and shudders as you squeeze him with an aftershock.
"'s'okay," he whispers and brushes your temple with his thumb. “ruin ya in the mornin'” In the morning? He wants to stay over? "God you're hot," he chuckles, cock still inside you. After a long moment of silence, he slides his cock out of you and you wince at the void. He lays on his stomach and drapes his arm over you. Your heart races and you can only hope he doesn’t feel it. You don’t want him in your bed right now. He's a novelty and he has to stay that way. Yeah it was fun, it’s been fun. It’s fun. You have his stupid drawing on your fridge, like a wild memory, a souvenir. But this. . . this is unsettling.  
You can't get attached to this sicko. But you know better than to try to make him leave.  He gets that look in his eye sometimes, and you just don’t know.  You take deep breaths and try to plot how you’ll get out of this in the morning. You can say you have to work. Yeah, you’ll say you have to work.  Eventually, you drift off under the weight of his arm. 
------
Thank you so much for reading and engaging! Love you guys.
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ddarker-dreams · 4 months
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what would make the husband rotation genuinely mad and would they act when theyre mad?? bad vibes for everyone
upsetting chrollo is an arduous endeavor.
he values control, whether it be over himself or others. creating the troupe would've been impossible if he was easily agitated. ironically, by muting his emotions for so long, he's set himself up for failure. when they do escape the fortress he built to contain them, they're wild. their repression drained any civility chrollo pretends to have.
regarding what it takes to get to this point... a third party revealing his criminal affiliations to you would do the trick. especially if the evidence they provide is irrefutable. chrollo isn't naïve, he's always been aware of the possibility. it'd be different if your efforts unmasked his identity. sure, he wouldn't be ecstatic, but he'd feel a hint of pride over your sleuthing capabilities. he almost considers it your right, in a weird way.
this sentiment doesn't extend to another's interference. they've inserted themselves into your relationship and warped your opinion of him. it's a violation, an intrusion. chrollo comes off as unusually detached when this information reaches him. he would've preferred you confront him, so he could control the narrative and do immediate damage control. with that plan dashed, his anger will simmer, until it can scald the one who tainted your perfectly fine relationship.
gojo satoru wants to be the center of your universe.
he's selfish, he isn't content with anything less than you in your entirety. he wants to be your partner, your best friend, your rival and confidant. he's cool with your friends and family (wow thanks gojo), since he knows that ultimately, you're both close in a way few can understand. shoko tells him at point blank that he's overdependent on you. he's aware, he just doesn't care to fix it. he's shameless enough to admit it as much without remorse.
for this reason, should someone capable of exerting influence over you stumble onto the scene, he would not be happy. megumi (kid or teen) remarks that he gets this 'creepy look', like he's pretending to be human. if he released a mere tendril of the cursed energy writhing inside him, it'd be enough to render most sorcerers comatose. his vibes become that abominable.
whether it be a former mentor, childhood friend, or some other role he can't fulfill for you himself — he wants to create as much distance between them and you as possible. fortunately for him, simply being himself is enough to repel most people. gojo inserts himself into your conversations until this person catches the hint. after knowing him for so long, you've grown immune to his questionable boundary crossing. he'll keep at it until they're scared off.
scaramouche gets angry with you for making him fall in love.
had his chest cavity not been empty, he would've clawed his heart out to avoid this harrowing feeling. the timidity, the vulnerability, oh, how he loathes it; loathes you for the spell you've placed him under! this resentment is, in truth, mostly directed at himself. shouldn't he have learned his lesson by now? how many times must he be chewed up and spit out before he stops wandering into the maw of emotional connection? he resolves himself to kill this... whatever it is you both share, before he's dragged through disappointment once again. he'll work himself up into a frenzy, all righteous anger and crackling bitterness—
—then your eyes light up at the sight of him, his name a warm exclamation on your tongue. in an instant, he's pacified, like he'd undergone a lobotomy. what a lovesick fool he is. you won't even let him fester in his negativity, you keep flitting about, earning his undivided attention. it's embarrassing how giddy he is around you (though he hides it beneath snark and condescension). when the interaction ends, he's left torn on what to do. all he knows is that he's running out of excuses to make this your fault.
blade's fury could slice through stars if you were ever hurt.
his mara is voracious until he returns every ounce of your pain tenfold. it's a scene from hell; rivers of blood, shredded limbs, piles of corpses tall enough to be mistaken for towers. in the heat of battle, he occasionally forgets where he is or why he's even doing this. then, all it takes is his mind's eye flashing the image of your face contorted in pain for his mania to blaze anew. you're precious. kind, warm, bestowing care upon him that he hadn't experienced in centuries. annihilation awaited anyone or anything that threatened you. he thinks death is too good for them, but it's the punishment he delivers best.
this explosive rage isn't finite. once his sword is deprived of living prey, he's forced to endure silence. entropy. an all-pervasive thought that you'd be better off with another. he never understood why you blessed him of all people with your affection. upon wiping his weapon clean, his reflection greets him. he scarcely looks human. drenched in viscera, eyes bloodshot and crazed. is this the man you love? what would you think, if you could see him now?
he almost wishes the fury would return. it's preferable to the hollowness he now faces.
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alexlwrites · 8 months
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from my notes app:
Just picture it: Yoongi who just... never had a crush. Sure, he has felt attraction that sometimes evolved into something more through dates or other encounters. But a crush? Feet kicking, face blushing, giddy giggles? No, he couldn't say he ever experienced that.
Until you.
Until you showed up, a new manager at the company, and left him shaking in his disconcertingly large boots. You were bright, witty, charismatic and hard working and he stood there, arms hanging by his side awkwardly like a damn emoji, hovering around you unsure about what to do, what to say, how to act.
It was so frustrating! He never felt this way before and at 30 years old he felt as if he was going through a late puberty: voice cracking when he tried talking to you, waking up sweating from a dream way too realistic, poorly timed boners when he saw you walking around the office with skin tight pencil skirts.
His so called friend weren't making it any easier for him: Yoongi had officially become the butt of every joke as the members collectively regressed back to the 5th grade, murmuring everytime you showed up "here comes your wife, hyung, here comes Mrs. Suga".
Thankfully, you seemed unaware of their jabs, even as yoongi's pale cheeks blushed fiercely at the name.
He didn't know whether to be greatful or resentful for your obliviousness. On one side, you didn’t seem to hear the constant on going teasing from the other 6 raccoons he shared a band with, which saved yoongi from the swift death at the pearly hands of embarrassment, ripping his dramatic soul from his even more dramatic body.
On the other hand, you couldn’t seem to take a hint! He tried all of his best moves: standing there silently next to you, offering you a single tangerine, playing the guitar when you walked in whilst offering absolutely no explanation or context, even wearing his most scandalous, whorish outfit: a white tshirt that showed his collarbones instead of his usual 37 layers of clothing.
He didn't know how to make it any more obvious! Should he just take you against the wall of his studio (he totally should!, his lower brain unhelpfully provided as you once again strutted past him leaving him sniffing after your perfume like the fucking dog he was)?
He even tried asking his friends for advice, the lowest form of humiliation possible: Jungkook offered only baby oil and told him to lose a couple buttons. Hoseok made him couple matching beaded bracelets. And Namjoon, scorpio venus horndog, told him to actually go through with the wall taking idea.
Funnily enough, Jin was the one with the most plausible idea: give her a gift, bake her something! Homemade goods would show her how much you care.
So there he was, at thirty years old, holding onto a plate of cookies like a lifeline, cold sweating in front of your office, ready to flee the building and suck up those cookies like a hungry Kirby and mop in his own lameness like the international grammy nominee celebrity he was.
And then you opened the door and his body just reacted on his own, thrusting the plate towards you silently as his eyes screamed pure panic.
"For me?" You asked and he just nodded "Thank you so much, you are so sweet!"
Yoongi felt his lips curving and even without a mirror he could tell he had a dumbstruck smile on his face.
"What's the occasion?"
Ask her out, he urged himself. Tell her how you feel, how you can't stop thinking about her face, how her smile fuled his daydreams and her perfume haunts his days, bleeding into his psyche and sinking its claws into his heart, turning every song he wrote into a proclamation of adoration and lust, tell her how...
"Hm, for all y-your hard wo-work" he sputtered, mentally face palming himself at his own words.
Bugger.
Bugger it all to hell.
(Part 2>>>)
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ham1lton · 5 months
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─── WE CAN’T BE FRIENDS (WAIT FOR YOUR LOVE)
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pairing: max verstappen x driver!reader
warnings: 18+ content - [oral f. receiving]. mentions of injuries. slight mention of cheating. toxic relationships. a lot of flashbacks, be prepared.
summary: you both grew up together as fellow drivers and the relationship always toed the line from friendship until something more. until a bad accident on the track damages your relationship beyond repair.
author’s note: remember this is an au so things may not be 100% accurate to real life events. don’t be surprised if anyone is acting ooc.
want to be updated when i post? join my taglist!
part one | part two | part three.
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[ we can’t be friends / but i’d like to just pretend ]
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FIFTEEN YEARS AGO.
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sometimes you feel like the loneliest girl in the world.
you sit down on the damp grass and start to play around with the green strands as a means of distracting yourself.
as the only girl in your current group, the boys would barely want to co-exist with you. let alone spend precious play time entertaining someone like you.
this meant that a lot of the time, you were alone. when you told your father at nine years old, that you wanted to be a formula one driver one day, he patted your head and smiled benignly at you.
“you can do whatever you’d like kiddo. just be prepared for the weight that comes with it.”
the weight would never feel as heavy as it did when you were excluded from the group.
you’d already exhausted all your entertainment options. you looked across the field to see all the boys playing with each other, roughhousing and kicking a football about. you had finished your book, you hadn’t been allowed an ipod until you were at least sixteen as your mother had warned and now you were bored.
until someone came and sat next to you.
you look up to see a boy that you knew vaguely. the one that had just beat you to narrowly win the go karting race. he looks at you and smiles, sheepishly.
“is it okay if i sit here?”
you nod. you didn’t have the luxury to turn away company. his arm was bruised, as you look at the motley of blue and purple on his fair skin. he sees you looking and hides it, laughing awkwardly.
“it’s nothing. the guys are just rough. that’s why i’m here.”
“i’m y/n.”
“i know.” he says. when you look at him blankly. he stammers again. “i know, i know because we race together a lot. i’m max. i’m not a stalker. i don’t think so anyways.”
“i didn’t believe you were. i just didn’t think you’d know who i was.”
“you’re really good. i always have to keep a look out for the competition.”
“thanks.” it was something about his matter of fact statement that made the warmth spread through your body. if the best thought you were good, that had to mean something right? maybe the sacrifices were worth it.
“no problem.”
you didn’t say anything else after that, but you knew you’d found a kindred spirit within him. the loneliness didn’t seem so lonely when he was there.
SEVEN YEARS AGO.
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“hey maneater.” a tall guy with dark hair leaned over and grinned boyishly at you. “saw that race, you were good.”
“i try.” you smile, chagrined. you hated parties. you hated clubs. you hated anything that put you in the path of men like this. the ones that were oily and greasy and would slip out of your grasp whenever you wanted them.
ever since you had started racing actual cars, and beating records that had been in place for years. the media had given you a nickname, ‘maneater’. max had laughed when he saw the news spread and when you jokingly tried to bite him, you both ignored the shiver that went through his body.
he had already started your dream. he had been a rookie driver for about a year when you still were working your way up. a small part of you resented him. was he simply the better driver or was he deemed so by everyone else?
max comes up to you, face flushed with laughter and alcohol as he he wraps an arm around your waist and buries his face in your neck.
“y/n. i’m tired.”
thankful for the distraction, you mouth a pretend apology to the random man and move your position to a more comfortable one. max always smelt the same, you couldn’t pinpoint the smell but it was always something so undeniably max that it took everything not to intertwine you both together.
“i did tell you to cool it with the drinks.”
“but i won. i deserve to celebrate.”
“sure you do.” you hum, stroking a hand through his slightly sweaty hair. “tomorrow you won’t think this is much of a celebration though.”
he turns up to look at you. eyes wide as he looks at you, as if he’s seeing you for the first time. you smile down at him.
“it’s always a celebration when you’re here.”
“is that so?”
he nods. settling his head down on your exposed thigh as your dress had slightly rode up.
“if you win more races, that’ll just give us an excuse to celebrate more huh?”
FOUR YEARS AGO.
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you had finally made it. you were going to be a formula one driver. you had done every stage of celebratory measures. you cried in happiness for your baby self. you called all your family members up, you called your friends and you called max. max insisted on sending a massive bouquet of flowers and a cake around. even though now technically you’d be rivals, he said it wouldn’t change anything.
you swore it wouldn’t either.
SIX MONTHS AGO.
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it had been at the abu dhabi grand prix when the incident happened. it started as how every race did. you arrived, you prepped for the race, you interacted with fans and followed whatever inane social media trend your team made you do. you did your pre-race rituals, and listened to your playlist.
the race shouldn’t have been too difficult. you were feeling confident. when you signed a little girl’s poster for you, it made you more excited to go out on the track and make history again.
when max gets competitive, he gets nasty. you knew that. you had always known that. so when you’re leading the race and a car comes hurtling towards you and causing a collision that sent your car spinning off the track, you had a sickly feeling in the pit of your stomach that it was him.
so after you woke up in hospital, as your parents spoke to the doctors. you went through your social media, seeing the crash splashed everywhere. it was trending on three social media sites. the photos of your unconscious body being wrangled from the car by paramedics had been posted by many big figures with prayers. for you.
(“ladies and gentlemen, this is a dark day for motorsport. our hearts go out to y/n and her family.”)
your father came in, his mouth set in a firm line. he looked at you and his eyes were sad.
“hey kiddo. you’re awake. i’m glad.” he smoothed some hair away from your face. you knew he was hiding something from you but you weren’t sure if you should press.“the doctor said you’re going to have to sit out this season. possibly the next too. the crash left you with too many internal injuries. you’re going to need more time to recover.”
you couldn’t move. you couldn’t breathe. you could only listen to the static of the small television in your room. the sound of your heartbeat and the sound of your dreams cracking in half.
“no.”
“no? honey, you can’t. the doctor won’t be able to sign you off.” your mother places a warm hand on yours. “i’m sorry but we need to focus on getting you better. you’re lucky you didn’t die.”
“if i can’t race, i might as well be dead.” you want to scream. to cry. to punch something. to punch someone. “no. you can’t stop me. i’ll drag myself in the seat if i have to.”
“your team has already signed you off honey.” your mother looks upset at your face. “they said to focus on getting stronger again. you’ll bounce back.”
“NO!” you screamed. “i’ve worked my whole life for this shit and he took it away from me? no. no! no, no, no, no.”
you start to sob. your whole body curls in on itself as tears flow uncontrollably down your cheeks. your parents attempt to console you but what use is it? you’ve lost your first love.
you don’t even notice max standing behind the door.
SIX YEARS AGO.
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you find yourself in the awkward position of being max’s date at some charity gala. you find this demeaning but max says it’s a chance to get your name and face out there. interact with the higher ups or something along those lines. he very clearly didn’t acknowledge your introverted tendencies when he said that.
the dress that you bought, hangs loosely around your legs. it’s cinched in at your middle to give the illusion of an hourglass figure. your body has been hardened by all the workouts and you desperately needed a night to dress up. yet, when you get the wrong sort of attention, you start to regret it.
(“you haven’t gotten a boyfriend yet honey. are you not into guys?” your mother had asked one night, as she helped you peel vegetables. your mother had never been a tactful person, but still, you spit out the carrot piece that you had been chewing on in shock.
“no! i mean i am. i am. i’m just, i’m focusing on me.”)
the truth was that you were in love with your best friend and it could never happen. he had a girlfriend for starters, you were attempting to claw your way into a man’s club and you knew that meant you couldn’t date any of the guys without the media hyper focusing on it.
you could imagine all the headlines if you’d threw caution to the wind and dated max. they’d all go after you and not after him. you thought for a moment if you could handle it. you knew you couldn’t.
you wanted max but you doubted it was mutual. you wanted max but it’d never happen, it could never happen. as long as you wanted a career, you couldn’t have the guy.
he walks up to you, grinning as he turns to the bartender and orders your favourite.
“what are you smiling about?”
“nothing. just, happy you’re here.” he hands you your drink and clinks them together. “i missed you.”
“i’m here. i’m always here.”
“so? i miss you even when you’re here. i think about when you won’t be here and i get upset. i’m thinking of glueing us together.”
“wouldn’t be very helpful when we drive our cars.”
“we’ll figure something out.” he takes a sip of his glass. thinking to himself for a moment. you wish for a moment you can read his thoughts. is he thinking about you? about the dress in his favourite colour? the fact you hired a makeup artist for tonight? that you spent hours on your hair? is he thinking about her?
“wanna ditch?”
“huh?” you ask confused. “we can’t. you said that this was important.”
“i spoke to everyone worth speaking to.” he shrugs. “we can stay if you’d like.”
“no, no. let’s go.”
he smiles at you, eyes crinkly and you want to kiss him so badly but you don’t. you can’t.
you leave the room together. giggling like kids as you attempt to sneak out. no one notices, or if they do, they pretend not to. when he reaches for your hand, you wrap yours around it.
as a shy, precocious child, when max had effectively taken you under his wing, you’d do whatever he’d ask. even as an adult, you’d do the same. when he kissed you in his hotel room that night, you kissed him back.
“is this okay?” he whispers, as his hand was on the zipper on the back of your dress. you nod and kiss him again. he groans as you press yourself down on him.
you step out of your dress, as he plays with the waistband of your panties. he smooths his thumb against the exposed skin as you stand in front of him. he leans in and kisses your hip.
“is this for me?” he looks at your matching lingerie set. you don’t know what to say. it was to make you feel sexy but he’s doing that for you now with the way his eyes darken as they look at you.
“do you want it to be for you?” he nods and you grin. “it’s always for you.”
“lie down.”
“why?”
“i want to eat you out. lie down, please.”
something in the way he sounded in that moment made you immediately listen. he sounded desperate. desperate for you.
losing your virginity to the man you’re in love with was never in the plan, but as you lie against the pillows as his face sits between your legs, you don’t care. you almost sing for him as he goes down on you. he presses his ring finger and middle finger in slowly and you shake as your legs lock in on his head.
the aftershocks tremble through your body as he crawls up and kisses you. smoothing his free hand against your skin.
“what about your girlfriend?” he shoots you a side-eye.
“now you ask?” he grins as you giggle. “we’re not together anymore. i never thought she was really for me. i don’t know. i think i compare every girl to you.”
you freeze. he kisses you goodnight and falls asleep but how could you sleep knowing that?
a week later, they’re back together and you try to swallow the hot tears that threaten to show. you channel all the energy into the race and place higher than him.
deserved.
yet, it still doesn’t get rid of the pain in your stomach when he posts her on his instagram with the caption - “my greatest prize.”
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Rumours - Lando Norris
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<word count - 7287> |part 1 - Nerd|
"Hey, I managed to get your wood pieces cut up yesterday. Don't worry, I did them the right size this time," Lando told you, sitting down opposite you at your table in the library. The two of you had been meeting quite often, now exchanging your ends of the deal you had made due to your maths test results. 
"Thank you. Don't forget that you still have to sand them and glue them, yeah?" you double checked, knowing that he had remembered but would pretend to forget to do it. Lando had been trying to wriggle out of his half of the deal, but you weren't letting him. 
"Yes ma'am," he said with feigned formality, saluting you. "And I want my maths done. We hand it in today, yes?" he asked, also knowing that you had already done it. Lando had seen you doing it the other day, and had to keep his friends from seeing him smile at you. 
He knew they'd make fun of him for being your friend, so he often found himself sneaking off to come and see you in the library. It wasn't that he was ashamed of being your friend, he just didn't want to face the backlash from his friends. 
Plus, he hadn't forgotten the hurt written all over your face when Max had made those comments about you nearly a week prior now, and he couldn't let you go through that again. He didn't know why, he had harboured a soft spot for you. 
Maybe it was because you weren't outwardly trying to flirt with him, maybe it was because you treated him normally, maybe it was because he liked you more than he liked everyone else. He found your sassiness endearing, and a welcome surprise. 
"Of course, but you're still going to learn how to solve quadratics at some point, you know that, right?" you told him, pushing the papers that were his homework over the desk and towards him. You had gotten pretty much perfect at plagiarising his handwriting so the teacher wouldn't be able to tell it was actually you doing the work. 
You and Lando had agreed that you were allowed to get a few of the harder questions wrong, just so it didn't seem like he had become a random genius overnight. He didn't want an expectation to be put on him once he actually had to do his own homework again, so he was fine with you messing up sometimes. 
"You'll teach me, I know you will," he smirked, and he was completely right. You would teach him, just like you had been pretty much all of his other subjects. You helped him with everything at this point, and he was more than grateful - even if he would never tell you that. 
The friendship that the two of you had formed was quick, to say the least. This time a week ago, you would have avoided Lando Norris at all times. He was cocky, arrogant and a downright dick. But now? He was lovely. 
Those short, daily meetings to check in on the progress that you were making on your ends of the deal were some of your favourite parts of the day - and they were his too. It was nice for both of you to just let loose and have a little giggle, even if you were meant to be being silent in the library. 
Neither of you really knew how you had become friends, you just sort of... had. After you had opened your results together, it was just how you were. It wasn't some slow and steady thing, it was more like an instant connection, and immediate understanding of each other. 
"You're right, I will. I need you to be better than Max," you said, still not liking Lando's best friend after the far from tasteful comments he had made about you. Lando had said that Max had apologised to him for it, but he had never directly apologised to you. 
Lando completely understood the resentment. If anything, he encouraged it. He hadn't helped, he knew that, but at least he had apologised. He tried to get Max to say sorry to you, but he had always refused. "I will be. How that idiot is in top set is beyond me," he quietly chuckled so that the librarian wouldn't tell you to be quiet. 
"You and me both," you agreed, just looking at him. He had always been handsome, even when you thought he was a massive dick. But now? He was even more handsome. That happened a lot of the time, really. 
If someone has a good personality, their looks are suddenly elevated by the tenfold. If they're a complete and utter arsewipe? Then they could be the most dashing guy in the world yet they'll look average at best. 
Now, looking at Lando, you thought he was gorgeous. If only you knew how he saw you. He had never really paid you much notice, not until now. Not until you had been stuck on the bus together. You were pretty at a glance, but the more he looked at you, the more he truly believed you were the prettiest girl in school.
Anyway, now wasn't the time for admiring each other's good looks. The pair of you had maths next period, and you didn't want to be seen together again. Lando was pretty sure that no comments would be made if you walked in at the same time, but he understood why you didn't want to run the risk again.
He'd go and find Max to walk with him, and you'd get to maths first like you always did. Bidding Lando farewell, you took yourself through the corridors of your school and down to the maths row. All of the classrooms were identical, save from a few student-made posters messily blue-tacked onto the walls.
Your teacher smiled as you walked in, not surprised to see you in early in the slightest. Eventually, everyone filtered in, Lando sending you a small smile as he walked behind Max to their seats on the back row. 
All of you had your books out and were ready to start, but your teacher didn't make any headway on actually starting the lesson. "OK everybody, before we begin today, I do have a few changes to the seating plan," she said, earning a chorus of groans from the class. 
You weren't so bothered, though. Anyone would've been better than sitting between the wall and one of Lando's dumb friends. Well, maybe anyone apart from Max, but you didn't think your teacher would do that to you. 
"We'll start with Max, can you swap with Lilly on the front row, please?" she asked as Max huffed, clearly not impressed with being put on the front row. Lando also wasn't overly enamoured at the swap, since he certainly didn't want to sit with Lilly. 
She had always flirted with him, and he didn't need even more of it for 5 hours a week. But, he was thankfully put out of his misery. "And since you have been absolutely smashing your work as of recent, Lando, you can come and sit next to Y/N. I think she could be a good influence on you," she said, and you had to stop a big, goofy smile from spreading across your face. 
Lando had been doing well since you had been doing most of his work, but you didn't even care. You were just grateful that you'd get to spend more time with him. Max watched with a disgustingly mischievous smirk on his face. "Miss, are you sure that's a good idea? You remember what happened last ti-" he started, and your teacher's face instantly turned thunderous. 
But, before she could get so much as a word in, Lando pipped her to the post. "Max, drop it." he sternly said, sending daggers at his friend as the class let out a series of 'ooos' and 'get told, Max!'. 
Lando paid no mind to them, since he had seen the way your face had dropped as soon as Max had opened his mouth, and he hated the way his friend made you feel. "Max go and stand outside," your teacher instructed, and Max stood with a sigh and took himself out of the classroom.
She read out a few more seat changes, then put the starter activities up on the whiteboard. They were just some simple equations, so you got them rattled out and finished within a minute. Your teacher walked outside, obviously to talk to Max and probably give him a detention.  
"Hey, you OK?" Lando whispered, still scribbling down his working out for some of the sums. Honestly, you were just grateful that Lando had stood up for you and stopped Max from saying something more than hurtful about you.
"Yeah, thanks for that," you nodded, flashing him a small smile. Lando was going to protest and ask again, but he didn't want to push you. If you said you were fine, he'd believe you. "Plus the three, not minus," you prompted, pointing at the line of working out on his page. 
"Shit, course. Thank you," he softly chuckled, changing the numbers on the paper. He was slightly annoyed at himself for making such a dumb error, but he was glad that you were there to correct him. He found himself completely agreeing with your teacher: you really were a good influence on him. 
You made him want to work harder, you made that competitive fire burn brighter within him. You had pushed him to get an A the first time, and after that, he had wanted more and more because the pay off of hard work was so refreshing to feel. He was used to average grades at best, but now the disappointment was something that didn't sit right with him. 
Your teacher walked back in shortly after, with Max in tow. He packed his stuff up and hurriedly made his way back out of the classroom, undoubtedly to detention. The rest of the lesson went by without a hitch, and it was nice to be pretty much forced to sit with Lando. 
You'd spend time with him either way, of course, but it was nice for the two of you to get a couple of extra hours a week that you wouldn't have to spend being quiet as mice in the library. The bell rang, signalling the end of the day as you all flooded out of the doors and out of the front gates.
You were waiting at the bus stop for your bus, and you saw Lando and his friends waiting too. You couldn't make out the words you were saying over the slight gusts of wind and the music in your ears, but you could hear witterings of your name. 
"I stuck up for her because Max was being a knob, she didn't do anything," you heard Lando protest, his voice slightly raised. He sounded... angry? You looked out of the corner of your eye to see some of them prodding at him, stupid grins plastered on their faces. 
They were clearly teasing him, and it was pretty obvious that Max had told them how Lando had stuck up for you during maths. In some ways, you felt bad. The only reason he had said anything was because he knew how upset you were the first time around, and he felt so guilty that he had let it slide. 
"She's over there, go ask her out," another one one jibed, pushing him in your direction. Lando's face looked dejected, since he knew that it wasn't easy to get his friends to shut up. They'd keep going until he said something that they wanted to hear. 
"I'm not asking her out, OK?" he sighed, just as the bus rolled up to the stop. 
Just like everyday, your bus driver had the same, dead inside expression on his face and he clearly wanted to be anywhere but driving that goddamn bus. He didn't even bother looking at your pass as you took yourself back to your seat in the corner. 
It was one of the unspoken rules of the bus: everyone had their seats, you never moved, never differed from the norm. The older you were, the further back you sat. The year 7s had to sit at the front, and they'd be met with yells and arguments from everyone else if they didn't.
Lando's friends scrambled to the other seats on the back row, leaving the one next to you free. It was obvious that it was on purpose, so he kept his mouth shut as he sat next to you. It wasn't that he was sitting next to you, no. That was never the problem.
The problem was that he was really worried that they would start to pick on you now that they had it in their heads that he liked you. Well, he did like you, as more than a friend. That much was clear to him right now. But he didn't want you to face the brunt of his friends teasing because he did in fact like you. 
It was just a stupid little crush, that was it. Nothing serious. Nothing serious at all. Did his heart flutter whenever you smiled at him? Yes. Did he feel volts of electricity when your hands accidentally brushed together? Yes. Was his day instantly made better when he talked to you? Yes.
But it was nothing serious. 
He just laughed along mindlessly to his friend's jokes, not really paying attention. Eventually, the bus trundled to a halt so that you could get off. Shuffling past Lando, you walked as quickly as you could so that his friends hopefully wouldn't notice.
"Hey Lando, this is your stop, right?" Max piped up, pointing at you getting off the bus. "Not going to see if she's better than last time? I'm sure she's had some practice."
Lando refused to stay anything, his face like stone as he let you peacefully get off the bus. "Was she seriously that bad that you really don't want more?" another one of his friends added. 
"I knew you guys were dicks but you're really taking the piss," he mumbled, suddenly getting out of his seat and swiftly striding down the aisle of the bus. "Stop, please," he said to the bus driver, who pulled over as Lando hopped off the bus and ran down the pavement to where you were. 
"Hey, sorry. I couldn't deal with them being complete twats," he said, stuffing his hands in his pockets and standing beside you on the pavement. For some reason, he couldn't meet your eyes, his fixed on the floor beneath his feet.
"I get it, don't worry," you agreed, not really sure what to do. Inviting him back to your house was completely off the table, but you didn't just want to walk away and leave him there by himself. "Is your mum coming to get you or...?"
"Yeah, I'll send her a text," he nodded, pulling his phone out of his blazer pocket. He shot a quick text to his mum, and she responded within a few seconds, saying that she was setting off as soon as she could.
Lando noticed that you made no move to leave and go home, instead you stayed by his side. You both stayed silent, unsure of what to say. It hadn't been this awkward between you since the bus ride the week before, and even that felt more comfortable than this did. 
"Just... do me a favour and ignore what they're saying, yeah? It's just them trying to be funny, don't pay any mind to it," Lando said, hoping that you weren't bothered by what his friends were saying. The last thing he wanted was for you to be upset by what they were saying, since he valued your feelings a lot more than he thought he ought to. 
He also highly valued your opinion of him more then he deemed necessary. He didn't want you thinking ill of him, or of his choice in friends. He didn't want you thinking that he was like them, or that he would say things like that. He didn't want you thinking that he didn't care.
Because he did. More than he'd ever care to admit. 
"Yeah, sure," you nodded, not fully convinced. Any time you'd ever been seen with Lando in school by other people that weren't the library lot, you were chastised for it. Yes, it had only been twice, but that was enough to convince you that being around Lando inherently meant that you were going to be hassled. 
Of course, you didn't want it to be like that. Life would be so much easier if you were allowed to just be his friend, and nothing else. You'd help him with maths and whatever other subjects he needed, you could sit together in class without having the mick taken out of you, and you could just enjoy his company. 
Lando could tell that you weren't swayed by his words, and he didn't blame you. His friends would likely make comments for the remainder of the year, and he'd just have to take it in his stride. 
Soon enough, Lando's mum pulled up at the bus stop, getting out of the car to come and greet you. "Y/N, it's lovely to see you again," she beamed, and the smile on her face was enough to quell the worries and slight annoyance that you felt at that moment. 
"Likewise," you nodded, spotting the same scarf around her neck that she let you borrow when the picked you up the week prior. 
"How has your day been, sweetheart?" she asked, even though her motherly instincts could instantly tell that something was wrong. She had also clocked how Lando would barely make eye contact with her or you, and he was fidgeting with his fingers. 
"Good, yeah. Lando now sits with me in maths, so that's... fun." you trailed off, looking for the right word to describe it. Lando sitting with you wasn't the problem, it was the consequences of it. 
"Then I'm sure you can keep helping him out with getting those A's," she smiled. "Now Lando and I have to dash, dinner is nearly ready." 
"Sure, it was nice to see you again. Lando, I'll see you tomorrow," you mustered up one last small smile, before turning and starting the short walk off to your house. Lando clambered into the car next to his mum as she began the drive home. 
"What happened, Lando?" she asked her son, not having the patience to wait any longer to find out what was bothering the both of you. He stayed silent, just staring at the road ahead as she glanced at him. 
He knew her silence meant she was waiting for an answer, and he also knew that lying to her would get him absolutely nowhere. "Just my friends being di- they're being idiots." he corrected himself, his mum chuckling at the slip up. 
"What have they done? Did they say something about Y/N again?" she pushed, waiting for Lando to cave and tell her everything. It never took her long for him to crack and pour out his soul to her, but it would take a bit of prompting. 
"It's just because I've been moved to sit next to her in maths, and after last week they all think I have a crush on her and stuff," he mumbled. And there were those pesky motherly instincts again. 
"So you don't have a crush on her?"
"That's not the point," he rushed, wanting to brush over the tricky topic of his feelings for you as quickly as he could. "The point is is that the comments they make are too far and it upsets her. She says it doesn't but I know it does," he sighed, his mum giving him some more silence to continue if he wanted to.
"I try to get them to stop but they just keep going and it's getting on my nerves." he complained, slumping back against the passenger seat of the car. 
"You've got to try and ignore them, Lando. I know it's not easy when they're being nasty, but it's the best you can do. If you're not affected by it, then they might stop and then it'll be better for both you and her." she said, fully knowing it was easier said than done. 
Lando was strong, she recognised that, but he was already getting worn down by the teasing from his friends. "Yeah, sure," he reluctantly agreed, trying to take his mind off of the whole situation. 
He contemplated texting you to see if you were alright, but that was when he realised he didn't have your actual phone number. He had your Instagram and Snapchat, but not your number. He felt like he was supposed to have it, but he never really thought to ask you.
Maybe he would tomorrow, if he saw you again. He had to tell you about his plans for your DT project anyway, and he had some science stuff that he needed help with as well. 
The next morning, Lando was on the bus as it rolled past your stop. You weren't stood there with your headphones in, shivering because of the biting cold like you usually were. The bus driver didn't even think twice as to why you weren't there, but Lando did.
Thankfully, his friends didn't notice your absence, or how bothered he was by it. He hoped you'd be in school, since he didn't want to go through maths without you. Also, he was wanting to come to the library. It was part of his routine now, and he didn't want to break it. 
He didn't see you in first or second period, but he didn't have any classes with you until later. Going to the library at break, he didn't find you in your corner table, and he really was thinking that you weren't in school today. 
Meanwhile, however, Lando was completely oblivious to the rumours that were spreading about the two of you. The more tame ones were that you both had crushes on each other, and the much worse ones made your skin crawl. 
It was basically all just what Max had said to you last week, complete with the high-pitched, borderline pornographic moans. But it wasn't just him saying it. It was nearly everyone you walked past from your year, all because of how popular Lando was and how notable you weren't in the social hierarchy. 
It was driving you crazy, comment after comment from people who you had never even spoken too. Constant taunts of his name, over and over and over. You tried to hide in all the places you thought possible: the toilets, spare classrooms, corners that no one was usually in. 
Yet you couldn't escape the seemingly unavoidable torment, all because your bus broke down a week ago. You couldn't tell whether you were upset or pissed off, the emotions all swirling together in a maelstrom in your mind. 
You knew Lando would have gone to the library to look for you, but you didn't want to risk even being near him. It was at the point where you were even dreading maths, your favourite hour of the day, just because you'd have to sit with Lando.
The whole experience was so jarring, since one minute you were happily able to mind your own business, but now? You were the center of attention for all the wrong reasons. 
Finally, it was lunch, and you swiftly strode past the canteen where everyone was eating lunch. They'd all be occupied for a short while, so you'd finally be able to find some solace. You also had some of Lando's maths homework to do, even if that was one of the last things you wanted to be doing right now.
Lando was sat with his friends while you walked past, all of them looking and pointing. It was at this point where he started to realise what was going on, and he was catching wind of all the rumours that were being spread about the two of you. 
Guilt sat heavy in the pit of his stomach, the feeling of complete helplessness weighing him down. He gave it a few minutes before saying he was going to the toilet, and none of his friends actually caught on to what he was doing. 
He walked towards the bathrooms, before ducking out of sight and darting up the stairs to the library. There weren't many people in there as his eyes scanned the surroundings. There were the usual people that occupied the room, and you - sitting in the corner, furiously scribbling away at that familiar, crumpled sheet of his maths homework.
For a moment, he just stood there and watched you. You kept crossing things out and punching numbers aggressively into your calculator. This was a far cry from your calm disposition, and it worried him. You had obviously heard the comments, and he knew that people would be saying things to you directly. 
He walked over, pulling out the chair in front of you and sitting down. You eyes flicked up, before focusing back down on the pages on the table. "Go away, Lando," you whispered, the sharp tone of your voice catching him off guard.
He didn't have chance to respond before you chimed in again. "I don't want to be seen with you, so please leave me alone."
Now that hurt. 
You didn't want to be seen with him. This would upset anyone, so he wasn't surprised that you weren't happy about it, but completely ceasing all contact and interaction with him was painful for him. He didn't want to be isolated from you all because the kids in your year were bored and had nothing better to do other than spread lies. 
"No one will come in here, it doesn't matter," he replied, leaning forward and resting his elbows on the table. You still had your eyes focused on his homework, your pencil still moving over the paper. 
"And if they do, they'll just say even more shit and I don't want it," you rushed, a single tear falling onto the page and staining it. You wiped them away, trying to stop more from falling from your eyes. 
Lando's heart did nothing short of break as he sat there, feeling completely powerless. He didn't know how to comfort you in this situation, he didn't know how to help, how to make it better. He hated that he was the root cause of all your upset.
"They won't, I'll make sure they won't," he rambled, needing you to believe him. You both knew it was a lie, and he'd never be able to stop the constant teasing for you. He wished he could, but that was simply all it was. A wish.
"Please just leave me alone." you whispered, thrusting the crumpled, tear-stained sheet of maths homework towards him. "And don't worry about my DT stuff, I'll do it myself." you mumbled as Lando just sat there for bit. 
You didn't look at him, just down at the wood of the table. He didn't know what to say, how to get you to believe him. With a resigned sigh, he pushed back from the table, picking up his homework. He folded it and tucked it into his blazer pocket, stepping away from you.
"I still want to be your friend, despite what they're all saying. And I hope I can be," he told you, before walking away and out of the library. He had never felt so unsettled after a conversation ever, and now he felt so down and dejected. 
Mindlessly making his way back to his friends in the canteen, all that he could hear were your words echoing in his head. Sitting back at the table, his friends' attention all turned to him. "That took you awhile." 
"You and Y/N go for a quickie?" someone else laughed, all of his friends bursting out in fits of laughter. Lando just sat there, face like thunder. God, he was getting pissed off. You were upset, his friends were being horrendous, and he had had enough. 
"Will you lot just fucking shut up? Your jokes are tasteless and downright childish. It's not funny, I don't feel like laughing and neither does Y/N, so just drop it and find something else to obsess over." he snapped, and they all just looked at him. 
For a short moment, he thought they were just going to bite their tongues and sit there. Maybe, the normally cool, calm and collected Lando losing his cool was just what they needed to mature for a moment and reflect on how other people felt, not just what seemed humourous at the time. 
But, reality was far crueler than that. "God is she really that bad? Why do you keep going back if you keep getting disappointed?" That was his final straw. 
"Fuck all of you, honestly," he spat, slinging his bag over his shoulder and walking off. It would only be a few minutes before the bell went anyway, so Lando took himself off to maths. As he arrived at the room, he found that the door was locked. 
Peering through the window, he saw you, sat there in your seat with a few tears trickling down your cheeks. Your teacher knelt down in front of you, balancing by holding onto the desk. Her face had sympathy written all over it, and it was clear that you were talking about what was happening. 
You kept wiping the tears away, but more stubbornly made their way out of your eyes. He felt like the convalescence was eating him alive from the inside and out. He wished he could take it away, make everything in your life as perfect as it should have been, but he couldn't.
Lando couldn't take watching you any longer, so he lifted his hand and wrapped his fist against the wood of the door. Your teacher stood and let him in, before pulling him over to the side. You still wouldn't look at him. "I know we've just moved you, but would it be alright if I moved you back onto the back row?" she asked.
He said nothing, just nodding and begrudgingly going to sit in his new seat. You didn't even want to sit with him. Lando pulled his phone out of his pocket, not caring if your teacher got mad. She noticed, but didn't say anything. "Lando phone away when people start coming in, please."
He put it away as soon as he asked his mum if she could pick him up, since he didn't feel like getting the bus. She responded with a swift 'yes', and he put his phone away as instructed. 
The end of the day couldn't come quick enough as maths droned on and he was finally able to escape. As he walked past the bus stop, he noticed that you weren't there. He figured you had done the same thing as him: asking one of your parents to pick you up to avoid the treacherous bus journey.
Wordlessly, Lando climbed into his mum's car as she looked at her son's face. For the first time ever, she couldn't tell how he was feeling. His face was completely blank, practically unemotional. She had never been this worried about Lando. 
"Sweetheart, what-" she started, before noticing the tears brimming up in his eyes. She would have pulled over, but she didn't want anyone from school seeing. "Darling what's wrong?" she asked, still reluctantly driving. 
"They just... they just won't stop." he said, his voice cracking with the words. "I just want them to leave me alone, leave her alone. She doesn't even want to be my friend anymore, I had to get moved away from her in maths, and it's just all shit," he rambled, a few tears rolling down his reddened cheeks.
"Oh, Lando..." she softly said, her heart breaking at the sight of his tears. He was never one to cry, or get overly emotional about stuff. He was a typical teenage boy in many aspects, and his emotions were no exception. He liked to keep things to himself, only letting is feelings show when they were hitting him in overwhelming bouts.
"Does she think you're saying things about her?" she asked, not wanting to upset him even more. 
"No, I don't think so. She just said she doesn't want to be seen near me when I went to go see her in the library like I normally do, and she was crying before maths to our teacher." he explained, and she was at a complete loss on what to do. "The stuff they say to her is just... God it's awful..." he mumbled, wiping away his tears. 
"Sweetheart I know this is probably the last thing you want to hear right now, but is that Y/N walking home?" she asked, and the question caught him off guard. Funnily enough, he looked out the window to see you trudging home. 
You had your hands stuffed in your pockets with your headphones plugged in your ears, your breath appearing like mist in front of you. That was when it dawned on him that your parents hadn't come to pick you up, you had taken it upon yourself to make the nearly hour long walk home in the freezing winter temperatures. 
"Yeah. Yeah it is," he confirmed, suddenly conflicted. His mum would obviously want to give you a ride, and he did too. He didn't want you walking home in the biting cold, but he also didn't think he could take seeing you upset, or you seeing him upset. 
But his heart won out. "Can we take her home, please?" he quietly asked, and his mum nodded, pulling over onto the pavement so that she could get out to talk to you. Lando got out to hop in the back, wanting to give you the front seat with his mum. 
"Y/N? Sweetheart? Do you need a ride?" she asked, approaching you as you pulled your headphones out of your ears. She could see the redness around your eyes, undoubtedly from crying.
"No, no. But thank you," you weakly smiled, the pained expression on your face making it impossible for her to just let you go.
"Lando told me about what's been happening. I understand why you don't want to be near him right now, but there's no one around, I will get you home and warm as quickly as possible." she reassured, hell bent on not leaving until she had you in the car. 
"OK," you agreed, walking to the car and getting in the front seat. Lando had already cranked up the heating and put the heated seats on for you, the leather warming underneath you. You knew he was on the backseat, but you refused to acknowledge him. 
Deep down, you knew you were being unnecessarily harsh towards Lando. He hadn't done anything wrong, and he had tried to be there for you in the best way he knew possible. Thankfully, he knew you weren't pushing him away because of him directly, it was because of what being around him brought you. 
He was sure that you still liked him, and he didn't take this personally. Yet it didn't stop him longing for you to be his friend again, to banter and joke with you and to just spend time with you like he used to. 
From his bag, he pulled out that same navy sweater and handed it to you, and you accepted it with a small smile in the rear view mirror. Your fingertips brushed against his as your fists closed around the fabric, the cold of your hands stinging his skin. 
You shrugged your coat off of your shoulders, pulling the jumper over your head. It was still too big on you, the sleeves stopping up to your knuckles. If you were standing, it would hand down to the tops of your thighs.
The drive to your house was silent, the only sound being the heating flowing through the vents as well as the occasional ticks of the indicators. After a short while of driving, you pulled up outside of your house.
Lando waited in the car as his mum escorted you to the door, a warm expression on her face. "Come here," she quietly said, opening her arms out to you. Without a second thought, you let herself fall into her embrace, softly shaking with silent sobs. 
"I know it's hard darling, I know it is," she whispered to you, one hand reaching up to stroke your hair. "It'll get better, I promise." she tried to reassure. 
For Lando, it was one of the worst scenes he had to bear witness to. He had seen you crying more than he had seen you smile as of recent, and it was killing him inside. He wanted to get out of the car and hug you as well, but he didn't want to run the risk of upsetting you even more.
Once you were settled in the house, his mum finished the drive home and let him have some piece. In his room, he sat at his desk, just mindlessly staring into space. You were all he could think about, and he couldn't shake you off. 
The sight of your tear-stained face was clouding his mind like an early-morning fog that he couldn't blow away. His eyes fell upon your pieces of wood for your DT project on his desk, as well as the maths homework he wouldn't be able to give you to finish. 
At this point, the deal didn't matter. Sure, you still had 3 weeks of homework of his to do, and he still had to do your workshop stuff for another week, but that was the least of his concerns. But he still wanted to do it for you. 
Lando had skipped dinner, not feeling hungry enough to go downstairs to eat. He also didn't feel like being held to people's questions and talks about what everyone had been up to in the day. He just needed some time alone. 
Just before he was going to take himself to an early bed, there was a knock at his bedroom door. "Yeah?" he called out, the door opening to reveal his mum.
"How are you doing?" she asked, entering and coming to sit next to him on the edge of his bed. 
"I'm... fine," he lied, not wanting to delve into the complexity of his feelings. He didn't want to have to voice his deeper rooted mindset on you. He couldn't tell if he was upset that now you'd never consider being anything more than his friend, or if he was more saddened by the fact that you didn't even want to be his friend anymore. 
He had been grappling with his feelings for the past couple of days, shocked at how quickly they had settled into his mind. Lando had never developed such a strong admiration for anyone in his entire life - even if every crush he had ever had was based off of purely superficial factors. 
But you weren't like that. Yes, he thought you were one of the prettiest girls he had ever laid his eyes upon, but it wasn't the driving motive for his feelings. He liked your personality, your humour, how goddamn smart you were. 
Seeing you thrive in the environment you worked best in was so fulfilling to him, and it was one of the many reasons he held you so dear to him. Yet he didn't know what to do about his feelings. He didn't want to ruin your friendship by telling you, but he didn't want to miss the opportunity to have something real with you. 
You were special to him, oh so special. He liked the idea of you as his girlfriend. Walking you to class, studying together, getting to sit together whenever you wanted and the comments wouldn't get to you because you'd be his. Maybe you'd even be able to sneak in a few kisses when no one was looking. 
Despite being the most sought-after boy in highschool, and the closest thing to an american 'jock' that a british secondary school had to offer, he still hadn't really delved into anything relationship-wise. No kisses for the sake of it, nothing. Hell, even Max had kissed a girl at a party once, but Lando never had.
"I'm really proud of you, you know," she said, wrapping an arm around his shoulders and tugging him closer to her. "You did the right thing today, even if it wasn't the most pleasant option for you," she continued. 
"I know you want her to be your friend again, but you've just got to give her time. People will forget about it and move onto someone else soon enough, but you've just got to wait it out and be there for her when she wants you, which she will. You're both very overwhelmed and neither of you know what to do, but it'll all work out." she reassured, kissing him on top of his curly locks.
"It doesn't bother me what they say to me, it's the fact that she's so upset by it... that's what makes it worse," he quietly admitted, leaning into his mum's comforting embrace. They sat there for a while, just hugging. 
"You need to get some sleep, sweetheart. You've just got tomorrow then all weekend, yeah? We can do whatever you want, with whoever." she told him, wanting to make his weekend as good as possible. 
"I've got homework to do," he sighed, thinking over all the assignments that he wouldn't be able to have your help with. Glancing back over at the desk, he saw the remnants of your DT project sitting there, his mind now set on doing this for you. 
"You can do it on Sunday," she told him, trying to sway him into just having fun for a day. She wanted to cheer her son up after the shitty few days that he had gone through, and he deserved a bit of respite. 
"But I want to finish off Y/N's project... I promised..." he whispered, the words tugging at his mum's heart strings. She had never seen her son so attached to someone, so desperate to please them and make them happy. 
She was proud of him, proud of the man he was becoming. It was obvious how much he cared for you, and she really hoped that you'd allow him back in again, than you'd allow him to be your friend and maybe more again. 
"How about you ask dad to help you with it on Sunday? Make it really special?" she suggested, and she noticed the slight light sparking in his eyes at the idea. 
"Yeah, I think I'll do that," he nodded, already running through the different possibilities of what he could do on your project to make it best in the class. He may have been struggling, but it wasn't going to stop him from trying to make you happy.
No matter what anyone said, how they made him feel, how they forced you to push him away, he'd always try for you. You made him a better version of himself, a version that worked hard and cared about more than just getting through school and being cool while doing it. 
You made him care about his grades, how he spoke to people, his actions. You made him better. You made him want to be better. For you. All of it was for you. 
A/N - I know, I've not posted anything in a week, I am sorry. I have been working on this one all week, and I have started the next part for y'all. Something about writing highschool Lando just hits different. It would be the same if I did Charles, Carlos, Max etc, but they would be in a british highschool because that's what I know best. Anyways, have a wonderful day/night, love y'all! 💖🤓
tag list: @anvi-sarai @robotchickenmerp @cheriladycl01
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themultifanshipper · 4 days
Note
hatesex with Daniel Riccardo x reader 🟠 reader is a sister of either max or Norris lol whatever works for you but they're at a party then Daniel and reader get to a huge argument max/Lando told them to settle it privately so they went to the guest room to talk it out and I guess you know where the story goes from here (reader getting absolutely railed by Daniel)
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It’s hard to make a name for yourself in motorsports when your last name is already famous, in the form of a three time formula one world champion.
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Warnings: driver!reader, Verstappen!reader, bickering, Daniel is a real dick in this one guys, but so is reader, rancid vibes, smut, PinV sex, rough sex, kinda dubious consent at first, choking, y’all know the drill, basically fighting and fucking at the same time, it's something
(Also I forgot to put the first prompt in the fic but it's the viiibe)
You'd trailed behind him, following his every step (with a few years difference) and at the age of 21 you were starting your second year driving for VCARB.
You had met Daniel back when he and Max were teammates, and you immediately disliked him.
He flirted with everything that had a pulse, and he'd jokingly made a pass at you, and you'd gone straight to tell your brother.
You were 15.
It didn't go down well, at all.
On both sides. Max was furious at him for flirting with you, and Daniel was furious at you for snitching given that he had no idea Max was your brother.
You'd always been a hot-headed child. Using your mouth before your brain was your biggest flaw.
Then Daniel moved to Renault and you didn't see him again much after that.
But you vowed that if he was still in F1 by the time you got there, you would make his life a living hell.
And it was just your luck, Perez got fired at the beginning of 2023, Yuki was promoted, and your teammate Nyck was dropped mid season. Which meant that through some kind of fucked up twist of fate, Daniel Ricciardo was now your teammate. And to make matters worse, Redbull's circus pony also had the seat the year after.
You were the Verstappen project 2.0, and Daniel was a deeply resentful motherfucker.
Forget Senna and Prost, forget Brocedes, forget the old Verstappen-Ricciardo rivalry.
There was a new Verstappen in town, and she was worse than the last.
More aggressive, more petty, more youthful, and more talented (although Max would disagree with that last one).
Daniel didn't stand a fucking chance.
You'd even tried to buy each other out of the team, unsuccessfully.
But you did have one thing over him, and he didn’t even know it yet. Max was retiring after his 4th title, and you had been given his seat.
Max of course was good friends with Daniel, which made social situations quite awkward sometimes.
Like the party you were currently at.
You had won the last race, in Australia of all places, and there was a two week break during which Lewis (coming off the high of a p2 in a shitbox of a Mercedes) decided to throw a massive party in his penthouse.
Lewis knew how to throw a party, no one could deny that, but he seriously needed to be more careful what kind of scum he let through his front door.
That was your alcohol addled mind talking as you spotted Daniel walk in, stupid shirt open showing his stupid toned chest and stupid pants accentuating his slutty waist and stupid thick thighs…
That was also the alcohol talking.
Somehow you both ended up in the same circle on the patio along with a few other drivers.
The conversation inevitably steered towards Daniel's future in F1 given that he didn't yet have a contract for the 2025 season.
“So how does it feel being outperformed by not one, but two Verstappens in your career?”
You knew the question was petty and stupid and could only lead to another one of your regularly scheduled shouting matches, but you didn't give a shit.
He stopped mid-sentence and narrowed his eyes at you.
“And, how does it feel that you're in a backmarker team 14 years into your career, being overshadowed by someone in their second year?”
The silence was palpable, the other drivers were sipping their drinks and pretending they weren't listening.
Daniel was staring at you as if he couldn't believe you would dare start this shit in front of the others.
But you were drunk and loose lipped and right now you were capable of saying anything to rile him up.
Such as-
“And, hear me out, wouldn't it be funny if I got the Redbull seat before you do? And I didn’t even have to suck Christian's dick to get it!”
The fact that you were getting the other seat next year hadn't been revealed to the public yet, or the other drivers, or Daniel.
The words hit the group like a freight train, and you almost regretted opening your mouth, but the look on Daniel's face made it entirely worth it.
His nostrils flared and he slowly got up, didn't say a single word, and went back inside.
 The circle let out a collective breath.
“No comeback” you sighed, disappointed, downing the rest of your glass.
Lando, who was sitting next to you stared at you “Is it true about the Redbull seat?”
You smirked at him.
“Maybeee”
You stood up, brushed yourself off and followed Daniel inside, with the intention of getting another drink, when you were stopped in the hallway by your brother.
“What the fuck did you say to Daniel?” he hissed as he pushed you into the kitchen. “He’s angrily ranting about Christian and I just know you have something to do with it!”
You crossed your arms defiantly and stared at the neck of his polo shirt, avoiding his eyes.
“I might have mentioned something about him being washed and not being considered for next year’s Redbull's seat…” you shrugged “He's only angry because it's true”
Daniel chose that exact moment to walk into the kitchen, and when his eyes landed on you he scoffed.
“Getting scolded by your big brother now? Must be hard living in his shadow”
Once again, your mouth reacted quicker than your brain.
“That's rich coming from Redbull's talentless cash cow”
“You only just turned 21 and you're already drinking so much everything out of your mouth is bullshit-”
“Okay, that's it!” Max yelled.
He slammed his drink down next to yours on the counter and dragged you to the nearest guest room, motioning for Daniel to follow you.
“You two are actually driving me up the wall with this shit! I don't know why you hate each other so much but I am sick of the constant bickering. You are not coming out of this room until you find some way to get along!”
He slammed the door shut on his way out and you and Daniel were left in silence.
You just stared at each other, full of contempt.
“I hate you”
“Oh, I know! You’ve made that abundantly clear!”
Silence once again fell upon you because neither of you had anything constructive or remotely helpful to say, so you sat down on the bed and picked at your nails.
He just scoffed again and started pacing around the room.
You didn’t know how long the silence lasted, but it felt like it stretched on for at least ten good minutes before you decided you’d had enough.
You stood up abruptly, planning on storming out of there without a word, your brother be damned, when you stopped by Daniel speaking up before you’d even made it halfway across the room.
“Is true about the RedBull seat?”
You realized for the first time how shitty his situation actually was. And it probably wasn’t made any better by your constant insulting him. And breaking the news to him like that, in front of everyone was probably humiliating, and quite frankly a very shitty thing to-
“Because if it is you definitely don’t deserve it. It should go to a driver that’s earned it with experience, not Max’s second rate bitch of a sister”
Okay, never mind then.
You turned around to face him. “What the fuck is your problem?”
“My problem” he started, pushing himself off the wall he’d been leaning against “is that you don’t deserve that seat, I do.”
“Well despite you sucking Christian’s dick for a decade, he doesn’t agree.”
Daniel stepped towards you, towering over your frame menacingly but you continued “I’ve scored double the points in the first half of this season that you scored in your entire time at this team, so whether you like it or not, I’ll be taking Max’s seat next year.”
He growled and leaned down so that there was barely an inch between your faces. “Say that again, I dare you.”
“Which part? The part about me being better than you? Or the part about how you’ve been bending over for any team boss that’ll have you? It’s not exactl- mmf!”
He’d grabbed your neck and crashed his lips to yours, silencing the onslaught of painful truths he couldn’t accept.
You reflexively grabbed a handful of his shirt and pulled him closer, other hand weaving into his hair and pulling, making him grunt as he easily slipped his tongue into your eager mouth.
Fuck it felt good. It had been a while since you’d been able to find a random person who didn’t know who you were to have sex with, so you were slightly pent up. You could feel your body temperature rising as you started getting breathless, and Daniel bit your bottom lip.
You suddenly realised where you were and pushed him backwards roughly.
"I won in Australia"
“Fuck you” he panted.
“Never” you spat at him before attempting to walk past but he intercepted you and pushed you roughly onto the bed.
“Fuck you, fuck your trophy and fuck this fucking dress”
He took advantage of your disorientation to climb on himself and turn you over, hiking your hips up and shoving your dress up. 
“The fuck are you-“  you were interrupted by your panties being dragged down unceremoniously.
You gasped as a finger came to dip between your folds to feel the dampness that had pooled there. “Daniel don’t you fucking dare-“
“Pretty fucking wet for someone who claims to hate me” he slipped a finger in easily pumping it and out a couple of times before adding a second.
“I do hate you, and if you think anything you could possibly do will change that then you’re even more delusional than I thought” you managed to say through gritted teeth as he added a third, before undoing his belt and pushing his pants down just enough to get his hard cock out.
He popped the tip inside and slowly, inch by inch, slip into your tight heat.
I took everything you had in you to not make a sound, you refused to give him the satisfaction.
When he nudged your cervix you shuddered, but your lips stayed firmly sealed.
“Say the word and I’ll stop, sweetheart” he said, voice cracking with how good your walls felt around him, he’d waited for this moment for a long time.
You didn’t make a sound though, and he chuckled as he pulled out halfway.
“Thought so”
He thrusted back in roughly, making you choke on a moan as he continued at a relentless pace and his hips slapped against yours.
You whined quietly and he leaned over you, hips never faltering, to whisper in your ear “what was that beautiful? I didn’t quite catch it…”
After a particularly hard thrust you moaned properly for the first time and he laughed.
“Fuck you” you spat and his hand went to wrap into your hair to pull your head back as he mouthed at your neck.
“I am fucking you, and you’re going to come on my cock. Because even if you get the seat, I’ll get the satisfaction of knowing I have something Max doesn’t. This sweet fucking pussy, drooling helplessly around my cock while he’s in the other room.”
Each thrust was harder than the last, and your eyes were rolling back into your skull as you tried to maintain some sort of control.
But you were failing miserably, Daniel somehow hitting all the perfect spots as your legs gave out and you were forced to lay flat on the bed while Daniel pushed your head down into the pillows and he bullied his cock into your weeping cunt mercilessly.
“Daniel, fuck!” you whimpered, you high quickly approaching after the change of angle “Shit, I’m gonna…”
You were right on the edge, but Daniel pulled out suddenly, ripping your orgasm from your grasp.
“What-!”
He turned you over and pressed you into the mattress by your neck and shoved his cock back into you before you could protest further.
“I want to see you come undone on my cock, see your pretty face as you lose control.”
You gave him the most hate-filled look you could muster, but it quickly slipped away when he hooked one of your legs over his shoulder to deepen the angle.
Small whimpers escaped you despite you biting your lip to keep quiet.
That displeased Daniel greatly, so he grabbed your jaw and leaned over you.
“Open.”
He was so forceful you had no choice but to comply and he shoved two fingers in your mouth and pressed down on your tongue to stop you from concealing your noises.
“Wanna hear you baby, I want Max to hear how his precious little sister is actually a whore. How Christians new driver is fucking ruined on my cock. How despite how much you think you hate me, you’re going to scream my name while I fill you up.”
Your hands were scratching down his back at this point, only encouraging him to go harder, and your abandoned high quickly came back full force.
You moans got higher in pitch and Daniel used his other hand to rub messy circles over your puffy clit, essentially throwing you over the edge as your orgasm knocked the wind out of you.
Your cunt spasmed and clenched around Daniel and there wasn’t much he could do to hold off his own high as he came inside you, head falling to the crook of your neck as his hips finally grinded to a halt.
He didn’t move for a while as you both lay there catching your breaths, slowly coming to terms with what you’d just done.
“Max is going to fucking kill you” you said, and he snorted before pulled out.
“Oh please, Max is in love with me. Besides, who’s gonna tell him? You?” he raised a cocky eyebrow as you pursed your lips.
He was right, you sure as hell weren’t going to tell your brother about this.
“Whatever, you’re paying for my plan B. I’ll send you the bill.”
He just chuckled as you quickly got to your feet to pull your dress down and straighten yourself up in front of the large mirror in the corner (God, Lewis was a freak) before going off to find a bathroom to clean yourself up properly in.
In the corridor, you ran into Max, who crossed his arms and blocked your path.
“Well? Did you two sort it out?”
“No” you growled and he sighed dejectedly.
You didn’t have time for this though, you could feel Daniel’s cum leaking out of you and running down your leg, so you pushed Max out of the way and rushed to the nearest bathroom.
Unbeknownst to you, Daniel came out of the bedroom right after, and just as Max looked at him he was still putting his belt back on.
It didn’t take a genius to guess what that meant, Max saw red as Daniel froze, the older man noticing him a beat too late.
Well, so much for keeping it on the down low…
The rest of the season was going to be interesting…
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hazelfoureyes · 12 days
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A Doe in Fall (Part 9)
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⟢HumanAlastor x FemaleBurlesquerReader - A Doe in Fall
A burlesquer with a penchant for conning men, you find your latest game interrupted when your next mark saves you from an aggressive fan— by killing him. The chance encounter left you curious, still half convinced you could complete your normal chase. Unbeknownst to you, you were the one being tracked.
Part 1 - Pretty in Red smut💦 Part 2 - Liar smut💦 Part 3 - A Tragedy smut💦 Part 4 - Enough Part 5 - Too Much Part 6 - Learning smut💦 Part 7 - Recognition smut💦 Part 8 - Trust sexual 🥵 Part 9 - Shiny Things 📍 Part 10 - Good Deeds
Part 9 - Shiny Things
Ephi moves in, and Ruth reads you like an open book.
「Warnings/Promises: HumanAlastor x Fem! BurlesqueReader, Reference to domestic abuse of non-reader character, fucks, crows, swans, emotions be emotioning, so many birds, I don’t think reader is Aromantic I think she’s just stubborn, Cliff diving is just a joke do not follow people off cliffs, everyone is kicking reader’s ass in some way, my apologies to parts of Texas but not Texas as a whole」
Long time no see ! My head wasn’t in the right space for this story, and my head was also literally not doing well. But! Reading glasses helped since I’m writing on my phone like 7 inches from my face. the goal is Wednesday updates~ there’s about four parts already written so we’ve got a month of runway 👌🏼 Wednesday mornings are ‘God, That’s Good’ by @macabr3-barbi3 and nights are ADIF!
🎶 last time on A Doe In Fall 🎶 : you came home from your first week staying officially at Alastor’s to find your estranged sister waiting on your stoop.
this isn’t sexy but just like minors come on, MDNI? This blog is a sex shop
It’s not that you hated your sister, it’s that you resented her. You could love someone and not like them an ounce… but unfortunately when she left so did your familial love. Which meant all that held you together now was distrust and an obligation to a dead woman. 
“So things didn’t pan out up north?” You waved her into your apartment, agitation apparent in even the gesture of your arm. 
“It’s peachy! Just need to lay low a bit.” She said it with a chipper voice while looking around your apartment like she paid for it. “Wow you weren’t lying about the no money, huh? Talk about a shoebox.”
Charming. 
“Well, Ephi, you’re welcome to leave.” While you didn’t understand the name it wasn’t your business to question what someone asked to be called. Especially considering your own dual identity. You may have disliked the woman but human decency still hung to the bones of the relationship you called your sisterhood.
An obnoxious chuckle, “Nah it’ll do! Just the one single bed?”
“Why would I have more than one bed?”
A deep sigh from her, “Still last to be picked by the fellas, sis?” Her hand passed over your dresses hanging in the open closet, “The ugly duckling was always your favorite story.”
The fine hairs rose on the back of your neck, a cat’s hackles moving as the anger bristled through your body. You opened your mouth to shout all the ways you were not the ugly one in the room, hand already in the air to direct her attention to the dried, hanging flowers covering the far wall. How many people threw flowers at her feet? How many proposals were shouted to her? Wedding rings slipped off fingers and into pockets for her? 
The air in your lungs went flat as a small fire of embarrassment rose in your gut.
How could she so quickly reduce you to a little girl again? Taking the bait for a fight you couldn’t win, because she wasn’t listening to anything but her own voice. Biting the inside of your cheek, your hand fell back to your side.
“You can take it. I’ll just be by for clothes now and then. Been staying with a friend closer to work.” Flipping through your mind you tried to catalog your valuables. What did you absolutely need to not turn up missing?
Ephi sat on the bed and crossed her legs in her best imitation of a lady. “Staying with Mister Fancy Pants?” A smile that reminded you of your childhood. A smile that said, “I won’t tell mom!” Right before turning and running to your mother’s ear.
“No.” 
A giggle two octaves above her usual tone, “Sure, okay! No skin off my back.”
You took your time to gather the items you had forgotten first, then the items you didn’t want her to have. Unsure how exactly to tell Alastor why a week into sharing his home officially you were already redecorating, you left that for your future self to figure out. The first item was obvious.
An angel statue your mother kept on her nightstand. You wrapped it in some newspaper, trying not to look in her direction. 
Your sister chased dick like most people chased liberty. Something she shared with your mother. Which was her right, but it rubbed you the wrong way how she would always forget everyone else in her life when she had a man to call her own. A fair weather friend, at that. 
“How’s Howard?” The dick that took her away so many years ago.
She abandoned the lady act and rummaged through your cabinets, “Who’s that?”
Right.
A gold coin on a necklace. You slipped it inside a sock. 
“So, then, who is the man of the hour?”
Ephi began opening the dresser drawers, poking here and there. “Whaddya mean! I am an independent woman.”
You weren’t sure that had ever been true. While your mother had drilled it into your skull to never place yourself in the need of a man, she always seemed to throw her heart (and house keys and purse strings…) at the feet of any man willing to love her. 
“Love” her. 
There was no love in any of that. A common problem of confusing love with any and all intense emotions affected your mother and many others.
Slashed furniture is not adoration. Breaking windows is not a love language. Bruises are not affection.
Your hands ran down the bag’s shapeless sides. Without thinking, you smiled. Adoration. Love languages. Affection. You had them and the knowledge of their secrets all to yourself. 
Secrets you didn’t need slipping out. Secrets your sister couldn’t hold to save her life, or yours for that matter. You hurried around the room grabbing knick-knacks and photos and jewelry. Alastor would be at work soon, you wondered if you should call to warn him. This time not about a hot headed flatfoot but a nosey sibling.
You’d tell him later. No reason to talk to Brenda again. Quickly your leather bag got full and heavy. What was supposed to be a casual foray into sharing a home already turning into a full on move. 
Everything you needed and a few things no one ever would, because damn would Ephi pawn them the very second she needed something, were safely zipped away. Any plans to relax at home before work were abandoned and you just marched to the door. 
A random memory flashed behind your eyes,  washing Alastor’s hair in the tub until the water ran clear. Why now? The only memory shared in your apartment. And it was an awful one. But, it had Alastor. That gave it value. 
“Hey, if any men come by looking for me you just don’t answer, okay?” You forced your face to relax, to show the sincerity you worked so hard to keep to yourself, “Please, Ephi.”
Her smile widened past unnaturally white teeth, no money for a room but clearly cash for peroxide tooth gel, “Ooh, why? Little sister make some enemies?”
Why couldn’t she just fucking agree?
“My job sometimes attracts crazies. I don’t tell them where I live but occasionally they figure it out. They’ve gotten violent before so…just don’t answer the buzzer. They’ll say they’re damn near anyone to get you to let them up.” You stopped the nervous twisting of your bag’s handle, “Boyfriend, boss, detective. They've tried it all.”
“Aww, sis. Look at you.” She leaned her full figure against the open door frame, arm raised up like a pin up. Ephi was always effortlessly enchanting when her mouth was closed. “Stalkers? Mama would be so proud. Finally learning how to catch a man’s attention.”
The tears that stung your eyes were inspired partly by anger and partly by pain. They came so suddenly you could only laugh in response. 
“Lovely to see your new name hasn’t changed you, Ephi. I’ll be back occasionally. Don’t steal anything, no strangers over. Spare key is in the bowl by the door.” 
“Oh hey!” 
You turned back.
“I do need some cash. Until I find work.”
The numbness blanketed you with a chill. 
“I’ve got like, three bucks. Is that fine?”
Why did you ask that? You knew she could very well say it wasn’t fine and you’d be obligated to offer to get more. Atleast, that’s what you’d have done when you were younger. How easily you both slipped into old roles. Or perhaps she never grew out of hers. 
She mulled it over, “Yeah that’ll be fine.” Her hand came out and waited for the bills.
An open palm waiting for your money.
You pulled the folded bills from your wallet and set them in her hand without touching her skin. 
“Thanks sis!” She turned and closed the door before you could reply.
✦ .  ⁺   . ✦ .  ⁺   . ✦ .  ⁺   . ✦ .  ⁺   . ✦
The other dancers shot you a look when your bag jingled and clanked as it hit the floor, you wincing as you remembered the ceramic figurine.
“You…. going somewhere, hun? The detective got you on something?”
A quick shake of your head. You hadn’t considered the optics. Luckily it was early enough the room wasn’t very busy. A few select missing women would have pried for more information. Your hands fidgeted, unsure what to do. On the way in you saw some newer talent getting their feet on stage, maybe watch them? Too early for make up. 
A loving voice from Ruth, always a savior, “Cigarette?”
You melted at the offer. Alastor wasn’t a fan of the smell so you were slyly cutting back. 
She popped a sun bleached folding chair open and set it in between you both as a footrest. So many broken and ruined chairs littered the sides of the dingy roof, you were shocked she found a good one on her first try.
“Alright, tell me what happened with that detective. Do I need to go rough up a city employee?” Ruth leaned back and settled into her chair with a creak and a whine of the wood.
You needed a second, eyes flitting around as she handed her cigarette for you to take a drag. What could you say? What did she already know? You’d not spoken about it since she helped shoo him away but the appearance of half your belongings haphazardly stuffed into a bag clearly had her alarms going off. 
“So remember the guy who came by for me? Tall handsome one.”
She nodded enthusiastically, “Yes! Of course. Don’t forget a name like his. Or face.” She whistled like a crude man trying to get a woman’s attention in the most annoying way.
“The detective thinks he did something to Tommy. That he was jealous. Which is ridiculous-,” you felt a nervous energy slip down your arms. 
An abrupt laugh, “That string bean couldn’t open a heavy window. He didn’t do shit to Tommy. What a stupid thing to say.”
Did she notice how much you’d been holding your breath? A deep sigh as you let it go. “Exactly! He doesn’t even know about what happened that night with that guy and Tommy’s arrangement; it’s too mortifying. Anyway, the detective has been hounding me about it. I don’t wanna cause trouble.” You ashed the cigarette and held it out for her, “Stuff is still new with him and me, so I didn’t tell the detective his details or work anything. Why would I? So he can harass him too?” The words all tumbled out so quickly. A faucet turned too far to the left.
“Fair.” A few passes back and forth in what you hoped was a comfortable silence and not an indication she was piecing together things you needed to remain unlinked. Finally, “Didn’t realize you two were still seeing each other. Longest one you’ve kept for awhile now.”
Looking up, you marveled at the view of the open sky. Not a cloud in sight. A smile crept across your face, the heat of the sun warming you from the inside out. The slightest chill to the air warning you of Fall. “Yeah.”
She asked what made him so special and you didn’t know where to start. “The obvious,” you began. “He’s so-,”
“Clever.” “Handsome.”
You’d spoken at the same time, her attempt at soothsaying failing miserably.
“Clever, Ruth. He’s very clever. Handsome men are a dime a dozen. But he’s sharp as a tack.” She rolled her eyes and waved her hand around for you to go on. You let your mind toss out the shiniest examples. “He’s so skilled. He knows how to hunt and take apart animals. He can fish. Cooks like a dream. He knows how to clean clothes well and how to use a washing board.” 
“Useful.” She mused. That isn’t what you meant. You weren’t trying to list off his features like a new appliance. It was just— impressive. He was well rounded.
“And he’s terribly kind. He’s always,” how to say it delicately, “going out of his way to help others solve their problems.” That seemed accurate and vague enough. You chuckled to yourself, remembering him at the kitchen table, “His face lights up so bright when he’s talking about his hobbies. Like, I can see his soul glittering behind his eyes and suddenly I’m just as interested in whatever he’s talking about as he is.” You let your eyes close around the mental image of his surprised face every time you complimented him. But they shot open when she began giggling, “What?”
“You’re in looooove,” her foot kicked yours, “I know that look. Head over heels already. Talking about him like he made the fucking stars.”
Wide eyed and stunned, was it written on your face so plainly? “Oh don’t say that. It makes me so uncomfortable. We’re just enjoying each other's company.” When she moved to give you the cigarette again you didn’t take it. “All I was saying was—,” fuck, what were you saying? That he was special? “He’s a very nice person to spend my limited time with. It’s a finite resource and all.”
With a shrug she took another puff, “What’s to be uncomfortable about? Falling in love is a wonderful thing, hun.”
Was it? Honestly, had she ever considered how much damage came with loving someone? It was putting your heart outside your body. Letting someone else carry it around and just praying they didn’t hurt you, or get hurt, or go off and die and take your heart with them. Why would anyone willingly do such a silly thing?
“Cheesy. And kind of creepy. Falling? How do I get back up if things go south?”
You’d successfully avoided emotional attachment to nearly every lover you’d taken. The way women seemed to get struck down dumb by any old John or Jane just wasn’t appealing. Love was for fools. The weak. The dependent.
Or, so you had whispered to yourself as you pretended to not be home when suitors came knocking, as you avoided ringing phones, as you apologized and slid out of restaurant seats after awkward dinners. 
“If you fall hard enough, you don’t get back up.” She said it like it was a good thing. “You’ll love them forever, even if you hate em.”
That was the problem, too. How could she not hear that as she said it? All loss of control of your own heart and emotions was simply bad. People do irrational things for love.
You shivered, “That sounds absolutely horrid, Ruth.”
“Aah,” she dismissed you with a raspberry blown between her lips, “For the right man, you’ll find yourself enjoying the trip down!” 
“Nah, I’m not fan of heights. No dick is worth that.”
“Is that all men are to you? Sex?” She guffawed, taken aback by your comment. Which was odd, given it was Ruth. 
But, Yes.
Well. No . But — he wasn't a man. He was something different. The exception to the rule. Alastor was different.
Or, fine. 
Yes, he was a man. 
No, you didn’t see them as just sex. It was easier to say people were just pleasure and not stop to think about life any other way. Things got complicated when you added another person. Life became sloppy and uncontainable. If you stopped and considered the lives behind the people you used to lead on and let go before things got too difficult, you’d just wound yourself. It was easier to stop at sex.
When you could. Which you could, before. When sex was a token you traded back and forth with someone. But Alastor didn’t accept that currency. You couldn’t hand him your body and get brief but lovely companionship back. Your value had to lie elsewhere, the things you set before him and the wonders he had to offer were much richer in their worth than what you’d ever had before. 
Sometimes it felt like you slid him a penny and he handed you a quarter. You found yourself scrounging up the petty coins of your worth and trying to save them up for him. Practicing your makeup, learning how he liked his coffee, remembering all of the things he said he hated and loved. Attempting to stop smoking. Every act was another shiny offering for him. 
A crow scrounging the park grounds for glittering trash. Not very swan-like, you thought.
“You really don’t think you’re falling for him?” Ruth put out the cigarette in the coffee can beside her. As you turned to argue with her you saw her face full of amusement and incredulousness. It was rhetorical.
The argument withered and you could only pout, everyone that day seeming to catch your tongue, “I don’t wanna think about it. I’ll get scared and run away. He’ll figure out how little I have to give eventually. If anything more is gonna happen, it’ll happen. I’ll just… let it. Why ruin it with… saying childish things.”
“You’re naive but that’s okay. Enjoy the honeymoon stage while you can.”
Your eyes rolled, “What if he doesn’t feel the same? Why embarrass myself.” When you sighed the weight of just how heavy and true that sentiment was resonated in your stomach. Telling him you were falling in love? Alastor was a killer. His passion was singular. What good was a dame to him? No, worse than worthless. A liability. A witness. A weak point in the walls he so carefully crafted. If he knew you were in love with him he’d just end things sooner than they would have naturally.
“Dontcha wanna know if he’s a waste of that precious time, then?”
You cackled, choking on your spit. Alastor? He was the most worthwhile thing you’d ever encountered. Time with him suddenly had …. Value. That fucking word again. But time with him, it was slow enough to be deep and rich, but so fleeting you already felt a mourning mood for how much closer you were to the end.
You could only shake your head, “Wait, Ruth, didn’t you get divorced?”
“Shhh that doesn’t count!” She rose and stretched her long arms up to the sun and then out to the horizon, “Plus that’s how I know what I’m talking about! After the honeymoon phase? You’ll be arguing about laundry and wishing you were strangers again. Fighting about children and lawncare.”
As your finger nervously came to your mouth, teeth cutting into the nail, you considered how if Alastor complained about laundry and you could argue back with the comfort of knowing neither would simply leave, that’d be….nice. The safety of being honest without the fear of the other person giving up on you. Was that love? 
And did that matter at all? 
You’d thought earlier you knew the answers but now, when someone else said it, you got scared of those words. 
Ruth must have put a spell on you. As you and a bevy of others danced in line on stage, arms over shoulders and legs kicking high enough to show cheek and jiggle the soft skin of your thighs and stomach, you felt butterflies in your gut. Alastor would be picking you up in a matter of hours. 
A few men sent you drinks, which you repaid with a wink and a kiss blown across the bar before downing the liquor. It was the usual routine. You hadn’t felt nerves to see Alastor quite like that since sheepishly picking out “comfortable” shoes.
Alastor’s eyes widened when he took the bag from you, not noticing your attempts to avoid making eye contact. He let out a chuckle, his best attempt at stifling the joking question, “Already moving in?”
He realized quickly enough that wasn’t a good joke. Not when he finally looked up and saw your stare was distant. 
“Everything okay, dear?” He walked to open your door for you, and you nodded a thank you and an affirmative.
Should you rip off the band aid? Should you just say it and see what happens? 
When you turned to look at him and blurt out a confession, you were stopped by the profile of his face. What a gentle face. A lovely jaw. Even his bones were better than other people’s. What were you doing in this man’s car? What little pieces of glittering trash were you about to toss at him on a random Friday night?
No, in the books you read, confessions were always grande affairs. Fireworks and dinner parties and passionate kisses in rain storms.
You’d have to put a little effort into this. His brows rose as he clocked your staring. Eyes on the road, smirk pulled to the right, his hand came to rest on your thigh.
He deserved something much better than whatever you had to offer. Something unlike yourself entirely. 
The drive home, and yes you let yourself linger on the word instead of shoo it away, you watched a deer jump across the dirt road just past the bridge. 
“The bucks chase the does. It’s part of their mating ritual. I guess it’s not unlike the ‘playing hard to get’ some women like. The longer the chase, the prouder the buck to snag his prize.”
You laughed, “Women don’t like it, I don’t think. Well, some do I am sure but… If we don’t do that then people think we’re easy. We need plausible deniability. If people learn we put out we can claim we didn’t really want to and save some face.”
Alastor grimaced, “Gross.”
Unseen, you nodded and turned to watch the buck leap after its doe. 
“Kind of funny, you chased me down, didn’t you?” Alastor’s comment pulled you back to him.
“Oh yes. That makes you my doe.” Your arm came to rest against the car door, the trees slowly rolling by in the darkness. “Reminds me of the small freckles across your shoulders.”
“My mighty buck!” He fawned, in jest, pretending to collapse into your lap. You shoved him back up and behind the wheel proper. “Well given the chance, I’d chase you for miles.” His hand flexed on your leg.
“To Texas?” You asked. Your usual end point.
“Further.”
“How far?”
“There is no limit. I’d … run right off a cliff, head first, if you were waiting at the bottom.” He took his hand back, needing both to hold the wheel. What he said hit him harder than he had intended. Was it too much? A tad too dramatic? A nervous clearing of his throat, followed by an awkward laugh to put more space between him and the confession. 
The idea of you making Alastor chase you was ridiculous. You enjoyed the games you played with others, but you were never meant to be caught. If you wanted that, you’d just…give yourself. As you had done with him. Only him. The first and last person you ever wanted to give yourself over to in any sense. “And if I just… lied down and let you catch me? Would that make me a poorly earned prize?”
“Nope! That’d make me a lucky duck. And make you quite smart, if I do say so myself.” A wink. “Why run from such a catch like me?”
You landed a smack on his arm, light and playful. 
A truly comfortable silence settled in, just the sound of the car trembling over the rough road. The newest model Ford was still as loud as the last, but luckily you were far from others. 
The words had lingered like smoke, and you felt the need to address them.  
“Don’t actually do that though. If I run off a cliff or something stupid, don’t you dare follow me.”
Alastor just laughed, wasn’t that what you were doing for him already? Diving into hell for some inexplicable reason after Alastor. He wasn’t expressing some lack of self preservation, he was merely letting you know he’d reciprocate the fall. You hadn’t made him run after you, but instead seemed to just….rest your neck between his canines. And trust. 
If you were to go to heaven, he wasn’t sure what he’d do. It was too late to redeem his soul now. How far was heaven from hell, anyways? If the devil survived the plummet perhaps he could scale the walls of his enclosure and breach the gates.
Though, as he thought about the idea of heaven, he considered how happy his mother would be to meet you. To take you from her would be as cruel as heaven taking you from him. 
Maybe he could make a plea. To just be able to see you from below. 
But if the knowledge you were happy and safe was all he had, he’d be a richer man in hell than he’d ever been on earth. It’d be enough. 
He’d just need to broadcast his radio waves a little further for your listening pleasure.
⋅˚₊‧ ଳ⋆Masterlist.ೃ࿔*:・
˖ ݁𖥔.Summoning the Horny Little Deer Cult.𖥔 ݁ ˖
@eris-norwega @reath-solia @catticora , @angelicribbons , @xalygatorx
@cxrsedwxrlds , @nonetheartist , @tsunaki , @janchei , @moonmark98
, @readergirlstuff , @berry-demon , @chirimeimei , @fairyv-ice , @olive-frog ,
@thonethatflies620 , @tiredkiwiii , @ilikemyteawithmilk , @whateverlololo , @psipies
@howabouticallyou , @roxxie-wolf , @fizzled-phoenix , @star-kujo-platinum
, @a-case-of-attachment , @multifandomfanatic02 @watereddownmilk , @bontensbabygirl @smoky000
@hoebihoeshi , @pansexual-opera-house , @polytheatrix , @lorddiabigmommymilkers , @backinthefkingbuildingagain
@harley2223-blog , @poinappel , @midnightnoiserose , @spookieroz , @missmidorima ,
@ivebeenthearchersstuff , @downbadforfictionalppl , @xx-all-purpose-nerd-xx , @sleepylittledemon , @aether-th3-enby
@dontfuckbutimfab @breathlessaura , @aperfectidiot , @certainlygay , @jth12
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