#wrote this in the car and i am hanging by a thread

[petboymart]

lost in the woods (NSFW)

f!reader x snow leopard sakusa + yak ushijima (2x1)

employee notice : i don’t know much about yaks and literally wrote this in my notes app bc i don’t have any wifi, so i couldn’t do any research,, so i based what i know off literally zootopia and assumptions (if i got anything wrong lmk, i’d like to know more abt yaks) also my head rlly hurts rn

this product contains : dubcon (kinda) 2 possessive wild boys, female reader, mention of female genitalia, tiny mention of readers fam, oral (reader receiving), titty sucking!!, fingering

you should really start listening to your father more often, you realize, as you look around and realize that you are not back at the campsite.

“remember to take the map with you, and go with someone when you leave the campsite!” he had warned, and of course you in your prideful glory brushed him off, you could handle going to the bathroom by yourself.

stupid. dumb dumb dummy you thought, internally beating yourself up.

right now you looked around, all the trees looked the same, and your flashlight wasn’t industrial size, and didn’t help with sight. cheap thing it was. it honestly felt like a cliche horror movie. your phone was dead and even if it did work you were in the middle of nowhere with no service. all you had was a bag with toilet paper, pads and tampons, water, a flashlight, a first aid kit and toothbrushes and toothpaste. you suddenly felt scared. you were lost, in the woods of the highlands in the middle of nowhere.

there was the sound of something snapping in the woods around you. you jumped. another snap of a stick on the other side of the woods. you wheeled around, flashing your weak flashlight as if it could protect you.

you heard a growl and whimpered.

“oh god please don’t hurt me.” you squeaked. the bushes rustled, and something took a step out. you screamed, throwing your flashlight.

“ah- ow!” a deep voice exclaimed.

“oh god oh my god please don’t kill me please! i’ll- i’ll hurt you i’ll choke you with a tampon!” you yowled, switching from begging sadness to fiery threats.

“of course you scared her.” a deeper voice called from behind her and you whirled around, falling on your ass as you squealed. the flashlight that had fallen on the ground shined brightly on the two figures, revealing two men.

the first man, who was rubbing his head as he was the one you threw the flashlight at was.. beautiful. he had nice curly black hair and dark eyes. he had two moles above his brow, and his face was set with a deep pout. he also had a pair of fluffy white ears atop his head and a thick spotted tail swishing behind him.

the second man was big, burly with large muscular arms and a broad chest. he had short brown hair that was tinted with what seemed to be the color of moss, and there were a few small flowers in his hair. his eyes were olive green and his face was straight and square. he was so geometric. he had dark floppy ears on his head as well as large horns that had vines and other herbs hanging from them, seemingly tangled in them. they both glared at each other, and then looked down at you. the one with the black hair sighed, the hand that was rubbing his head moved to reach out to you.

“i’m sorry for scaring you, i didn’t mean to. i just saw you were panicked and i wanted to help. i’m sakusa.” he said, his white ears pinned to his head as his face flushed pink.

you took his hand, standing up, still silent in shock. the other man huffed, dragging his foot against the ground.

“i’m ushijima. i also came to help. you’re lost.” he said, the last part wasn’t really a question, it was a statement. that’s when you found your voice again.

“yeah.. i um.. i don’t know where my campsite is.” you murmured, avoiding eye contact with both of them. you could feel their heavy eyes on you, and you held back from squirming.

sakusa stared at you with dilated pupils, you smelled nice. fresh. clean. his nose twitched. he wanted to rub his face against your neck and your face and your entire body. his instincts insisted he take you to his home and lay you in his nest of furs and feathers and keep you there until you smell like him entirely. you could scratch his ears and rub his belly. he could keep your safe and warm with his own body heat. he clenched his fists to tether himself to reality, to control his urges.

ushijima thought you looked like a doe, lost in the woods all alone. you fiddled with your hands, biting your lip nervously. ushijima wanted to bite your lip himself. he wanted to pick you up and carry you away, keep you warm nestled in his arms, the thick hair on his chest perfect for you to nuzzle in. you seemed like you would fit perfectly against him. he could carry you on his shoulders to pick the fruits in the trees, lay you on his back when he was in his animal form and nap with you as you helped take leaves out of his thick coat. he blinked himself out of his dreams as you stared at them both wide eyed.

they glanced at each other, seeming to have a little staring contest before both nodding, begrudgingly.

“we’ll take care of you, sweet one. we’ll keep you safe for the night.” sakusa said in a honey sweet tone, as you carefully nodded. him and ushijima both took one of your hands, and ushijima took your bag. you didn’t know what to say really as they led you to a cave, watching you with sweet eyes.

“there’s no furs or blankets, we’ll keep you warm.” said ushijima as they watched you sit down on the cave floor.

they sat on either side of you, their warm bodies emanating heat. you were still sort of dazed from the whole situation as you laid down. sakusa hugged you from your left, as ushijima did the same from your right. the yak’s large hand squeezed your hip, making your stomach tingle. the snow leopard nuzzled against your neck, purring. the vibrations from his bare chest made your heart thump.

two kind strangers have helped you when you’re lost in the woods and are even keeping you warm. yet all you can do is think with your cunt?! you internally berated yourself. two kind strangers. two insanely attractive large hot strangers. both of whom were pressed against you like there was no room when you were all in fact in a very large cave.

you squeezed your legs together, using all your willpower to try and calm your nether regions, as sakusa’s clawed hand rubbed circles on your stomach, only covered by a thin tank top. you were hot, you were sweaty. you weren’t wearing a bra. you shuffled around in your laid down position, your shorts riding up to reveal more of your thigh and just the slightest glimpse of your ass. black panties. you didn’t notice but the two wild boys.. no, wild men, did. ushijima breathed in sharply, steeling himself. sakusa parted his mouth just slightly, the scent of your hidden treasure making his eyes roll back in his head. the two looked at eachother. they wanted you so bad. they could tell you wanted them too.

slowly, slowly, sakusa used his hand to bring your face to his. ushijima’s hand that was on your hip moved lower, tracing shapes on your shorts. you shivered. the straight faced yak smirked just slightly. you looked at sakusa innocently, plump lips just mocking him with the way they parted to huff out a short breath.

his self control was in shreds. sakusa kissed you, making your lidded eyes fly open in shock as you jumped. you didn’t know what to do, barely comprehending as you kissed back.

sakusa’s catlike tongue poked around your mouth. tasting and rubbing against your tongue, the strange texture of his tongue giving a brand new sensation to you. ushijima wanted your attention too though, as his big hands went up your shirt, his rough palms cupping your breasts. you squealed into sakusa’s mouth as he moved his lips from yours. your lips were puffy and spit slicked and it made sakusa purr. ushijima squeezed your breast’s and you moaned.

“we want you. do you want us?” ushijima said, levelheadedly as if his hands weren’t kneading your tits.

“mm-mhhhm yes oh-!” you said, squeaking. when you said yes, ushijima tugged on your nipple, making you squeak.

sakusa purred. he dragged your shorts off, as you lifted your hips so he could wiggle them off, throwing them somewhere in the cave. ushijima rid you of your shirt. all that was covering you were your panties, and soon those were gone as well. you were laid bare beneath them as they took your body in with glazed eyes.

your breath came short and fast as they observed you, then slowly moved. ushijima kissed your lips, once again cupping your breasts and playing with your now erect nipples.

sakusa lowered himself until he was at the same level as your drooling cunt. he gave a tentative lick and your leg twitched, and he proceeded to bury his nose and mouth into your folds. you squealed into ushijimas open mouth, as the yak swallowed all your moans hungrily. his mouth moved from your lips to your tits as he took your right nipple into his mouth, tugging and rolling the other one between his pointer and thumb. his warm mouth around your nipple made you squirm, as you tangled your hand into his hair and tugged. he groaned. ushijima sucked harshly on your nipple then lazily dragged his tongue over it.

sakusa was deep in your pussy, lost in the taste and scent. he swallowed your juices greedily, pushing his tongue in and out of your throbbing cunt. his nose rubbed against your clit, making you close your legs around his head. that made him feel even better as the feel of your thighs enclosing him, making him stay down there, felt heavenly. his sandpaper tongue twisted and slurped your cunt, before he brought a finger into your pussy too, then another. he pumped in and out of your pussy rhythmically, as he continued to suck and kiss and practically make out with your pussy.

both of them stimulated your most sensitive areas, and soon heat built up in your stomach as you clenched your fists. your moans grew louder as you approached your high.

“‘m gonna cum, ‘m gonna cum-“ you chanted, eyes rolled back. that made ushijima and sakusa work harder, sucking and licking and doing whatever they could to bring your orgasm closer. they succeeded.

“cumming! cumming cumming cumming-“ you repeated as the knot in your stomach snapped and a wave of pleasure crashed into you. you let out a silent scream as your body went rigid, yet you began to twitch as ushijima and sakusa didn’t stop.

“i just cummed- i can’t-“ you started but when you lifted your head you were met with two animalistic stares.

they were not done. this was going to be a long night. you squealed as the overstimulation crossed with a second orgasm. in the dim light of the cave, you could see something thick bulging out of both of their pants.

well, at least you weren’t still lost in the woods.

[unluckyhoneybee]

The Handsome Artist. 9. (Daniel Ricciardo)

The Ricciardos. Danny's family comes to L.A. and Abigail gets the chance to meet them.

MASTERLIST. Moodboards and Playlist.

Previous part: Bug Eyes.

Note: UNCLE DANIEL EVERYBODY. UNCLE. DANIEL. Pic. It's a long chapter.

I was trying to make the thing fit in the pot. The poor plant had been living in a small plastic one, too small for her huge amount of roots. As I put soil on in for the first time, I heard the tubular bells hanging over the shop's door.

"Charlotte! My hands are dirty!"

"I'm on my way!"

I kept singing softly the lyrics of some First Aid Kit song.

"Abi! It's for you!"

I frowned.

"For me?"

"Yes!"

I sighed and washed my hands. I walked to the shop and when I moved the curtain to the side, I gasped.

It had been a week since we all had breakfast together. We had both been busy and it had been impossible to meet again. But there had been some text. Some sweet text and what he called soft flirting.

"Hey"

I smiled.

"Hello, Daniel"

I walked to the counter and Charlotte winked at me.

"I'll be on the back"

She left us alone and Daniel leaned on the opposite side of the counter.

"Good morning" He said on the sweetest voice.

"Good morning, sir. How can I help you?" I said trying to not laugh.

He chuckled.

"Well. I have been told that this is the best plant shop in the whole West Coast."

I rolled my eyes.

"They probably lied"

"It has the prettiest florist, though"

I blushed.

He reached his hand to mine and threaded our fingers together. I smiled and ran my thumb over the rose. It was probably my favorite tattoo of his.

"I need your help"

I looked up at him.

"For what?"

"Three very nice and beautiful ladies are coming to visit me and I need flowers for them"

"Oh."

"One of them is actually this tall." He said gesturing some kid's height.

"Oh! Your niece?"

"She loves flowers and if I get flowers for my mum and Michelle and not for her, she will hate me for life."

I felt my heart melt.

"That's so sweet, Danny" I said with a smile. "Of course I can help."

I let his hand go and took my notebook. He leaned closer to see me write.

"Okay, bouquets? I suppose they won't be able to take a whole plant on its pot on the plane"

"Yep. Bouquets"

"So... For mum. What does she like?"

He bit his lip.

"I don't know?"

I giggled.

"Okay, okay. For Michelle and your niece..."

"Isabelle"

I smiled.

"You know what for them?"

"Isabelle loves daisies."

Daisies for Isabelle.

"What's your mum's name?"

"Grace"

Roses for Grace.

"Why roses?"

"Well, you are her son. You are away. You have a rose in your hand. I'm sure she thinks of you when she sees a rose."

Danny opened his mouth to speak but said nothing. He just nodded and a little smile appeared on his face.

"And for Michelle..." I pinched my lip and looked around the shop. "Tell me what do you like, Danny"

He looked around like me.

"What is that?" He pointed at some purple flowers.

"That? Iris."

"I like that"

Iris for Michelle.

"For when do you want them?"

"Friday"

I nodded and wrote it down.

"Delivery?"

"Can you?"

I nodded.

"Then yes. Delivery, please."

I added that too.

"And... You nephew doesn't like flowers? Or plants?"

He shook his head.

"He likes cars. And dinosaurs."

"Are you like a hundred percent sure?"

"I think so? He loves going to ride dirt bikes with me"

I bit my lip. That's cute.

"I don't want him to feel bad because his sister has something and he doesn't"

He looked at me for long seconds. He was thinking. Deep thinking. I could see his head running. Then his whole face flushed pink and he looked down.

"You are right"

"Am I?"

"Yeah, I think so"

We both chuckled.

How can you miss someone in a week?

"What do I do?"

Oh well, this is new.

"Um... I don't know much about kids. I don't have kids around. But... Maybe I could make something for..."

"Isaac"

"Something for Isaac" I said. "Flowers can be for boys too. I hate when people always say that flowers are girls things."

"Add something for Isaac then" He smiled.

"Fine. I like sunflowers" I said looking up at him.

"Sunflowers then"

"Perfect."

"They arrive at the airport at 10. Long flight. Plus an hour or so till we get home and unpack and everything"

"By 13.00 would be fine?"

He nodded.

"I'll be there."

"Perfect."

We looked at each other and he grabbed my hand.

"I can't wait to see you again. I will be busy these days but I will try to have some time for you"

I clasped my hand over his.

"No, Danny. You family flew from so far to see you. Spend time with them, okay?"

I didn't want him to loose time with them only to give it to me. I would stay in Los Angeles and only the stupid city traffic would separate us. His family would close the world and they won't him in a while again.

He bit his lip.

"Sure?"

"Super sure"

He played with my rings.

"I'll talk to you."

I smiled and nodded.

"Okay."

Was this what you were supposed to feel when falling in love? It didn't felt like this the other times.

"I have work to do. I don't want to, but I have to leave"

I bit my lip.

"No problem."

"Yeah, you are here selling cute plants and I'm on my way to tattoo someone's armpit"

I couldn't help but laugh. He smiled proudly.

"An armpit?"

"A raccoon in an armpit"

"Oh wow" I chuckled. "You better go, I don't want you to be late to such an important appointment"

He rolled his eyes but laughed anyway.

"See you, okay?"

"Of course"

I walked him through the door, where he stopped and turned to me. His brown eyes were so bright today. He looked so happy and beautiful. I couldn't contain myself. I got on my tip toes and pressed a soft kiss on his scratchy cheeck.

Daniel smiled so big and my heart went crazy. He was fast moving and wrapping an arms around my shoulders, he pulled me close and kissed my temple and then my forehead. I closed my eyes for a second and enjoyed the feeling of his cotton t-shirt on the tip of my nose, his perfume and the weight of his arm around my shoulders. How would it all feel somewhere else? How would it feel to be loved by him?

On Friday.

"So... On your way to meet the in-laws?"

"Charlotte, we talked about this" I groaned. She and Molly had been talking nonstop about how I was going to meet, Danny's family.

"What? I like him. His family must be as nice as him. Bad people don't raise a boy like that"

I sighed and put Grace's bouquet on the basket. It was the second one I have done.

"Why do you have notes for two small bouquets?"

"For Isaac and Isabelle. His nephew and niece."

"Ooh kids" She smiled and took some daisies frome the water. "Does he like kids?"

"I think so. At least his sister's kids."

"You would be a good mum."

"Oh my God, Charlotte! I have just met him!"

"He has good genetics!"

I laughed.

"That's what matters. Good genetics."

She pinched my cheek.

"You make a cute couple"

I blushed hard.

"Do we?"

"Yes. You do. I can't wait for it to be official"

We finished the bouquets and looked happy at them. I have to say that I put some extra effort on them.

Charlotte helped me putting them on the back of my truck and I set the GPS with Danny's direction.

"Good luck! Tell them I say hi! And you can obviously invite them over for dinner. All of them, I'll make space"

"Charlotte..."

"Next time they visit, maybe?"

I smiled.

"That's better"

I kissed her goodbye and started driving. I was way more nervous than I should. I was terrified. I was only working, yes. But I was working for him. And I was delivering to his family. People I didn't know. People that I thought it would take longer to meet.

So when after a long drive through the city, I parked outside the house, I was already shaking.

The house was cute, painted in yellow and pretty similar to the others in the street. The pink car was parked outside, next to a big Audi and the cute little vespa. It made me smile. The house didn't suit him at all and the car was way to bright for the street. I was sure his neighbors didn't like him, which was funny.

I parked the closest I could and took the bouquets on the baskets with me. A difficult task, I have to say. I set them around me on the floor and rang.

I heard loud noise on the other side, people laughing and talking and my heart beated so hard. I could feel it on my ears.

The door opened and a woman, not old enough to be Grace, opened. She must be Michelle.

"Hello" She asked confused.

"Um... H-hello. I'm Abigail and I come from Charlotte's garden. Are Grace, Michelle, Isabelle and Isaac here?"

She opened her mouth and a big smile appeared on her face. Yes. She has to be his sister.

"I am Michelle"

"Who is there?"

A woman who looked exactly like Danny appeared. Eyes, hair, nose... Everything.

"She is Abigail and has something for us."

"Oh! What a susprise!"

They were sharing smiles that made me so so nervous. Why?

"I'm Grace"

"Hi Grace"

"Abi?!"

Daniel appeared with a little blonde boy hanging from his back.

I smiled and blushed. He looked so good. So happy and recharged. Better than ever. He was glowing.

"You are here"

I nodded.

A little blonde girl apeared too and I melted when she touched his leg and called him Uncle Dan.

I moved nervously, trying to not be so obvious and show the whole family how much I liked him.

"Um... This one, iris, for Michelle. Roses for Grace" I said clumsily but smiling. If Charlotte sees me...

The two women grabbed their bouquets with big smiles.

"Oh, Abigail, you did them? They are beautiful". Grace exclaimed.

I nodded and felt my cheeks even warmer. I must have watermelon color right now.

"It's super nice. You are so talented." Michelle said.

I looked at Daniel and the look on his eyes made me shake. Love. He smiled and gave me thumbs up.

Then I looked at the cute little girl, who was looking serious at her mum and grandma's flowers and I remember what Danny said. The girls was jealous and wanted flowers too.

"And... Is Isabelle here? I have flowers for her too" I said taking the daisies bouquet from the baskets.

The little girl's mood lighted. She took Danny's hand and he smiled at her.

"Go" Danny told her with a big smile.

The girl was shy, looking at everyone around her and asking silently for approval.

"Go, Isabelle. Abigail brought something for you"

I knelt on the floor and took her mini bouquet. She walked to me.

"Are you Isabelle?"

She nodded.

"And... Do you like daisies? A little bird told me you do"

Daniel left Isaac on the floor and the boy went with his mum. Then he bent his knees too next to the little girl and hugged her protectively. Obviously not because she was in some kind of danger, but for the little girl to feel safe.

"Do you, Isabelle?"

"Yes"

"Yes? So... Do you like this? They are only for you" I said smiling at her.

"Oh wow!" Daniel exclaimed.

My heart was beating so fast. He was looking at me and it was different. It felt good. It felt awesome because this was his family, he had opened it to me.

"Aren't they pretty, Isabelle?"

"So pretty" She smiled.

I reached them to her and she took the smaller bouquet, made for a kid. She laughed happily and turned to her mum.

"Mum!"

"They are super nice. What do we say, Isabelle?" Michelle told her.

"Thank you..."

"Abigail" I told her when I saw she was doubting.

She giggled and turned to Danny, who leaned so she could whisper on his ear.

"She is pretty"

Daniel laughed and blushed, so did I. Everyone had heard.

"She is..." Danny whispered too.

I cleared my throat and got up, turning to take the sunflowers. I looked at Isaac, who was observing from the back.

"And... You must be Isaac"

He nodded.

"Do you like sunflowers?"

He nodded again.

"Well, these are for you then"

"For me?"

"Of course"

He took them and smiled.

"Wow, Isaac. It's the first time you get flowers!"

"Dad and I always get flowers for you and Isabelle" He said happy to his mum.

My heart fluttered and I couldn't avoid smiling. Daniel looked at me and gave a knowing look. A thankful look because the kid was actually happy. Both of them were.

Then Isaac turned to me.

"Thank you, Abigail"

"Oh, you are welcome guys. I'm so happy you like them" I told both kids.

"They are beautiful, Abigail. Daniel told us you worked with plants, but I didn't imagine you would be this talented!"

Wait, what?

Daniel giggled nervously.

"Thank you, Grace. I really appreciate it"

The woman gave me a warm smile and touched my arm.

From the corner of my eye, I saw Danny picking Isabelle.

"Is the shop far?" Michelle asked

"Kind of. But it's no problem"

"Danny said it was by the beach."

"Yes. In Santa Monica."

"Is she a princess?"

I turned a bit when I heard Isabelle.

"She grows plants and talks to little birds, so she must be a princess. A forest princess."

"I think she is. She is really cool, right?"

I looked at them. I felt how the whole attention was on me, even though we were all looking at the little girl.

"She is super cool and pretty."

A little hand touched mine. I looked down at Isaac.

"Do we have to put the flowers in water?"

Grace laughed.

"Yes, if you want them to last many many days"

"Uncle Dan! We need water!"

Daniel left Isabelle on the floor again.

"Yeah? Let's..."

"Isaac, Isabelle. Let's go and get the water. We can ask Mike for help, right?" Michelle said.

Daniel looked at her and smiled a bit.

Soon, the two women had gone with the kids.

Daniel walked to me.

"You must be the best. Really. You are awesome" He said taking my hand. "I-I don't know how to thank you"

"Paying the bill" I joked to make the atmosphere lighter.

He laughed and pulled me for a hug. So tight, so close. I hid on his neck and closed my eyes, wrapping my hands around his waist and feeling his body. I was trembling.

Why do I want to cry?

"Isabelle already likes you"

I smiled. He kissed my head and pushed me a bit.

"Do you want to meet my dad? He is on the backyard with Michael"

I swallowed.

"You don't have to if it's too much."

"I-it's fine. Let's go. So I can say goodbye to the others."

He smiled and took my hand, guiding me through the house. There were photos, loads of them, some books, weights here and there, a couple of big sofas but not much furniture. It wasn't as packed as my little apartment. It felt more like a temporary home.

He brushed his thumb over my knuckle, pulling gently and easing my nerves.

As we got closer, I heard a loud man talking and laughing, the kids and Michael.

"Dan..."

He stopped and looked at me.

"Are you okay?"

What did I even wanted to say? That I was terrified of meeting them all?

"Hey...". He cupped my cheeks. "Stop thinking so much. It's fine. They will love you."

"D-did they know?"

His face went a pale.

"I told them a bit. You are just so nice and awesome. I-I couldn't not do it. Does it bother you?"

It didn't, it just felt weird. He had felt the need to tell his family about me. He thought I was interesting enough.

"No."

"Do you want to go?"

I nodded.

"He is nice. Just like me."

I smiled and squeezed his hand.

"Lovely".

He opened the glass French door and they turned to us.

"Abigail! Nice to see you again"

Michael came closer with his nice smile and good manners.

"Hi, Michael."

Daniel looked at us with a smile. Then he turned to the man. He had gray hair and didn't look much like his son.

"Hey dad. She is my friend Abigail"

I had never been less bothered to be introduced as a friend in my whole life. It felt to soon to be anything else. Too much stuff to know and discover yet.

"Hi, Abigail. The guy here didn't stop talking about you. Now the kids too"

Everyone laughed. He made me smile. How were they so nice? Charlotte was so right. She was always right.

"He is my dad. Joe Ricc!"

I chuckled. Daniel was excited. Nervous but excited, grabbing my hand hard and keeping me so close.

"Nice to meet you, Joe"

"Same thing, Abigail."

I felt a touch on my leg.

"Abigail"

I looked down at Isabelle.

"Where do you grow the plants?"

"Oh! I have a shop, by the beach."

Daniel knelt in front of her.

"She has sooooo many plants in there."

Isabelle was looking at me with bright eyes.

"More daisies?"

"A lot" I told her with a smile.

"Can I go and see it?"

"Of course you can, sweety"

Daniel looked up at me.

"Bring them one day. I'm always there."

"Yes! Please, Uncle Dan!"

Danny kissed her cheek.

"Okay. And then we can go and swim in the sea"

She nodded.

"I'll be waiting"

I didn't spend much time there. Danny and Grace walked me to the door.

"Abigail, it has been a pleasure to meet you. And let me tell you again that the flowers are really beautiful. Thank you very much"

"It was all Danny, I just put them together."

"Nah, that's not true. She is a genius" Daniel said pushing me slightly.

I rolled my eyes.

"I'll text you before going to the shop"

"Yes, please. I don't want to be delivering or gardening or something"

Grace smiled, observing how Danny and I said goodbye.

I got in the truck with a chest full of happiness. A different way of happiness. They were lovely.

On Tuesday.

I pathed around the shop, putting everything in place. Charlotte wasn't here today. She had her weekly poker morning with her friends. Poker and margaritas while I cleaned and let the nerves consume me.

"It's a big step. But you already took the half of it. Think about how he is introducing you as a friend. As Michael. He is taking things slow. Just remember to be yourself."

That's what Jeniffer had said.

The truth is that I was willing to see them again. The kids, Isabelle specially, had taken a little piece of my heart. They were so cute and blonde. So different from Dan. But so energetic and smiley. It was probably a family thing because the vibes they had were awesome.

I heard the tubular bells on the door and I ran to the shop.

Isabelle was standing there with Grace. The little girl saw me and went all shy.

"Hello!" Grace said.

"Hello, girls."

I walked to them.

"How are you? How are you finding the city?"

"Really nice. Right Izzy?"

Isabelle looked at me and nodded.

"Oh honey, what happens?" Grace asked.

The girl hid a bit. Right then, the door opened, Daniel appeared with Isaac on his shoulders. The little boy gasped.

"It's like the jungle"

It made us laugh.

Daniel was looking at me with a smile. He mouthed a hi. He was so freaking cute.

"Hey, mate. I'll leave you on the floor. You are getting big and I'm getting older"

He put Isaac down.

"Good morning"

"Good afternoon, Danny" I corrected him.

His mum gave me a knowing look and touched Isabelle's hair.

"Hey, princess. What's going on? Don't you want to see the plants?" Then she looked at me. "She gets a bit shy sometimes. But she has been talking about visiting you the whole morning"

"Oh, it's okay. I can get shy sometimes too. It's fine. Let's give her time"

Danny POV

Isabelle looked at her with a tiny smile and let mum's hand go. It was a sign of her getting more comfortable.

I looked at Abi and my heart went crazy. This was what I wanted. She was what I needed.

"Abigail"

Isaac called her and she walked to him kneeling on the floor and solving the boy's question.

My mum looked at me.

"What?" I whispered.

"I like her" She whispered on the same way.

I blushed and my mum laughed.

"Hey, do you want to see where the plants grow?"

Isabelle looked with attention trying to hear better what Abigail and Isaac were talking about.

I touched the girl's soft curls and she looked at me. I crouched in front of her.

"Why don't you go with them? You don't need to talk or..."

She wrapped her arms around my neck.

"Do you want me to take you?"

She nodded. I picked her and she wrapped her legs around my body. My mum caressed her cheek.

"Come over here"

We followed Abigail, who had opened a curtain to the back of the door.

"Where do this stairs take?" Isaac asked.

"My home. I live up there"

"That's cool"

Isaac was walking next to her, asking about everything and looking around.

"Here. I call it the nursery. All the baby plants stay here until they are old enough to go out and get a home"

Isaac was trying to see the plants but he wasn't tall enough. Mum tried to go and help him, but Abi was fast enough to get a plastic box for him to use as a step.

"Thank you, Abigail"

Me heart was pounding on my chest. This kids were the most important thing I had. I loved them more than anything. And Abigail had just gone and bonded with them so fast. Even faster than with me. Maybe it's was just my head making things up.

My mum touched my arm and pushed me so I could take Isabelle closer. I did. My arm brushed Abigail's and I felt my breath hitching on my chest.

Izzy was looking at her with big eyes. She already adored her.

"Where are the daisies?"

Abi smiled.

"Right here, sweety." Abi reach her hand to another box and took two daisies. "One for Isabelle..." With so much care, she put the flower on Izzie's hair. "And another one for Isaac" She put it on his shirt. Both kids shared a happy look.

"Look how pretty you look! And you little man? So distinguish." I told them. They were so so happy, and so was I.

When they warmed up a bit, they started following Abigail around. I couldn't even have a moment alone with her. Mum had linked her arm around mine and we were both quietly observing them.

"Dan"

I looked down at her.

"How are you?"

"I'm happy to have you all here"

"Not about that."

I sighed.

"I'm good, mum."

She kissed my shoulder.

"It's just... I see you looking at her and the kids and... Is she what you want?"

I looked at Abigail. She was making them laugh with a cactus. I didn't even know what she said, but happiness washed over me.

"She is, mum"

"You should invite her for the barbecue."

I bit my lip.

"Maybe she... I don't know if she'd wants"

"It's fine. That's why you have to do it. If I do it she will say yes only to please me. Go and ask her."

She pushed me. I took a deep breath and walked to her.

"Hey"

She smiled at me. A beautiful and genuine smile. She has happy with them.

"Abigail!" Izzy made grabby hands at her and Abi picked her.

Oh man, I'm going to faint. With my niece on her hip, Abigail turned to me.

"Did you want something?"

I bit my lip and looked at my mum. She gave me thumbs up and I felt like a kid again.

"We are having a barbecue and I was wondering if you wanted to come. On Thursday."

She opened her mouth to speak but didn't say anything.

She doesn't want. It's okay. It's soon. We are not even together.

But she looked at Izzy. The little girl touched Abi's curls.

"I think I want to go" Abi said with a little smile.

"Oh, t-that's amazing"

She blushed.

"I like your earrings" Izzy touched one of them, making us laugh.

"Do you?"

"Uncle Dan will buy me tons of earrings when I'm older."

"You have to win them first!" I told her.

Abigail looked at me with bright eyes.

"What are you going to buy me then?" Isaac asked.

"A dirt bike, mate. I promised"

"Over my dead body!"

My mum exclaimed. It made Abigail laugh.

Oh shit. I wasn't ready for all of this.

"Maybe a normal bike" She suggested.

"Mum said I can have one!"

On Thursday.

"So she is coming" Mike asked when we were setting the barbecue.

"She is, mate"

"And how are you?"

"Nervous as hell"

Mike chuckled. Blake and him where the ones who knew almost everything about me. They knew me so well.

"They already like her, Dan"

"I know. It's just... Do you think it's too soon?"

"No, not really. She is your friend. Blake and I are friends. Lewis is your friend. You have invited your friends to a barbecue with your family. It's fine. And... They get to know her this way, don't they? I saw her at Piarles that night. She is shy. It took her more than ten minutes to start a conversation with me or Blake. Let her warm with them. Let her open. What's the other option? Go to Australia on July and introduce her as your girlfriend. I think this is better. For her, the most"

I looked at him open mouthed. He was a mentalist or something.

"How are you like that?"

He shrugged.

"I read minds"

"I knew it."

We laughed.

"She looked happy the other day" He added.

"She was. And when we went to the shop? Radiant, mate. She was awesome with the kids."

He smiled.

"I can already see you married"

I rolled my eyes and laughed.

"I would like the past Danny, the one who didn't even want to talk to her, to see this Danny"

"Yeah, lucky I have you babysitting me"

"Lucky she appeared on the shop, idiot" He hit the back of my head and laughed.

"Uncle Dan"

We turned when Isabelle called me. She was wearing a nice flower skirt and a little white shirt. Her her was up. Half up, just like Abi did hers.

"Wow, princess. You look fantastic."

"You really do, Izzy." Mike added.

He was like a brother to me, so he was almost a part of the family.

"Do I look good? Abigail is coming to the party and she is really pretty. I want her to like my clothes" She touched her skirt. "I think she will like the skirt because it has lots of flowers."

I bit my lip and Michael looked at me.

"Of course she will, Izzy. You look so soooo pretty. And Abigail will definitely love your skirt."

She walked to me and touched my face.

"Is Abigail your girlfriend? Isaac says she isn't. But I like her a lot."

I took a deep breath and looked at Mike. He made a sign for me to answer.

"She is not my girlfriend, Izzy. But she is a really special friend, okay?"

She nodded and pouted a bit.

"Hey, no sad faces, okay? I want my girl happy today." I touched her little nose.

"Okay"

"A hug and a kiss, c'mon"

She hugged me and kissed my cheek.

"Now, go and tell Isaac to come out and play with Uncle Dan."

They were leaving tomorrow pretty early so I wanted to make the most time with them.

"Mate..." Mike said once she left.

"I'm not the only one who adores her"

"She is easy to like. I think she is good for you"

I smiled.

"You always had a good eye with this things"

"Trust me then. And don't fuck it"

I nodded. He came and hugged me hard.

We heard the door bell and my heart skipped a beat.

I walked there too. I found Dad at the door, he was already talking to her. She looked so perfect and beautiful. Her long skirt moved with the wind and her hair fell in waves. She had pulled the half of it on a bun, just like Izzy.

It's happening fast. So fast.

Blake appeared behind her and said hi, she moved then to the side to let him in and looked at me.

Go, Danny. Go.

I took a deep breath and walked to her.

"Hi, Danny. I-I brought this sweets. They are this little cakes they do in a bakery close to the shop. They are super tiny and have fruit."

"That's amazing"

I leaned and kissed her cheek. And suddenly...

Abigail's POV.

"Abigail!" Isaac came running with a little car on his hand. "Look!"

Still with Danny's hand on my waist, I leaned a bit "It's so cool"

He smiled. "It's like Uncle Dan's. But in red. Not pink."

"I prefer the red one"

"Oh!"

I looked at Daniel, who was faking being offended but smiling even though.

"Sorry, Daniel. His is waaay cooler."

Isaac chuckled.

"Hey, little man!"

Blake called him and he went with him.

Daniel smiled at me.

"Someone is waiting for you, you know? I fear I'm not the one who likes you the most anymore."

"O-oh Danny"

"C'mon. I'm excited to have you here. Lewis will come soon, too"

I smiled and nodded.

He took me to the backyard, where Grace and Michelle were having some drinks while Michael and now Joe were putting the first pieces on the barbecue. Joe had been more than nice welcoming me at the door. Now both women smiled brightly.

"Hey, Abigail! Welcome!"

Michelle gave me a hug.

"Hi, Michelle. Thank you."

Grace came too and gave me another hug.

"You look amazing. Someone is going to get really happy. The skirt it's beautiful"

"Oh thank you."

I wondered where she would be. Isabelle.

"Yeah. Where is she?" Daniel asked as if he could read my mind.

On the corner of my eye. I saw the curtain moving. Isabelle was looking from the glass door.

"Hey, princess. Why are you hiding there?" Daniel said finding her too. "Come here and say hi"

She walked slowly and I smiled.

"Hey, Isabelle. How are you? You look really pretty today" I said smiling.

She blushed hard and grabbed her mum's hand.

"Izzy wanted to wear her flowers skirt because she was sure you would like it" Michelle told me.

Oh.

I felt Danny's hand on my waist, his fingers tightening his grasp. It felt heavy and warm. It fitted perfectly on me.

"I love it. What a coincidence I'm wearing flowers too" I said moving my skirt a bit.

"I like your skirt too."

"Thank you, Izzy. Can I call you that?"

She smiled.

"Can I call you Abi? Uncle Dan calls you Abi"

I nodded. Abi was only for special people. Molly, Charlotte and Danny were the only ones calling me that. But this kids were so sweet.

"Of course you can"

"Yes!"

"Can I call you Abi too?"

"Of course you can, Isaac"

Grace fixed his hair.

"You should go and help Grandpa with food."

The kid ran to him.

Izzy was still looking at me and Danny, who hadn't moved his hand from my waist.

"Uncle Dan and I always play horses. He is the horse and I am the animals princess."

"Oh wow."

"Do you want to?" Danny asked her.

Soon I was sitting with Michelle and Grace looking at Danny running with Isabelle on his back and Isaac around him. My heart was beating fast. I couldn't avoid it. I had a really pretty guy who was also good with kids willing to date me. How had I done this?

"He wants to be a dad so bad." Grace told me.

"Mum, don't scare her"

It was as if, even when Daniel had introduced me as a friend, they all knew more.

"Um... It's fine, Michelle." I swallowed. "I didn't imagine him to be this close with them."

"He may be far away, but has always worried about them. He wants the kids to feel them close"

"It must be hard" I half whispered.

Grace nodded.

"It is. He is my little boy and he is away. So far. But he is happy now. He has a good life. And he loves Perth too. So... I still have a little hope." She had a nostalgic smile while she looked at his son and grandchildren playing.

"He has good people here. He has lots of friends. Daniel is the social butterfly." Michelle added. "That makes it easier. He has Michael and Blake, who we are sure that take good care of him. He works with Lewis who is an amazing professional. And yeah, now he has you."

I looked at her. What does it mean?

"Now it's you scaring her!"

I giggled and blushed.

"What I mean is that... Well, I don't even know. You seem like a fantastic girl, Abigail. That's the kind of people I want around my little brother"

I chuckled.

"Okay, it makes sense." I answered. "He makes it easy. He has always been good to me."

"How did you meet?"

"I got a tattoo"

"Oh!" Grace exclaimed. "He was nice to you, right?"

"Yes! Yes, of course he was. He was super respectful."

Daniel had gave a really really nice first impression. From the first time we met, to the two hours I spent half naked on the studio.

"Fine. I raised him for that" She winked at me and I giggled.

"Don't worry about that. He is so nice. Really."

She reached for my hand and squeezed it.

"I remembered when he was a teen. He was loke 15 or 16 and wanting nothing more than to go to Europe and learn from some guy. He was so convinced he was good enough."

"Mum made him finish high school first" Michelle said laughing.

"Well, I wanted him to have something instead of the tattoo thing if it didn't work."

"It did, mum. It worked!"

Daniel exclaimed from were he was playing with the kids.

"And I'm happy for you!"

We laughed. I looked at Grace and she looked at me. I couldn't read what she was thinking of. But she hadn't let my hand go yet.

"He is a bit of an idiot. I hope you can manage that."

I giggled.

"He's fine."

"Nah, he is not. He is like another kid." Michelle said.

I observed him with a smile. I still felt overwhelmed sometimes thinking about it. About his energy and personality, much bigger than mine. But it wasn't the same anymore. I started to like his way of being. To enjoy it. I had stopped comparing us so much.

"Oh jeez. I need a beer." He said leaving Isabelle on the floor.

Isabelle went to her mum and took a big sip from her water. Meanwhile, Isaac went to Joe and asked about the barbecue.

"I'm getting old"

"You are not, Uncle Dan. Grandpa is old, not you" The boy said.

"Hey!" Joe started tickling Isaac and kid fell laughing to the ground.

I noticed how Danny had his mum's looks but dad's personality.

He came with two bottles of beer and sat next to me.

"Thanks"

"No problem" He smiled.

He was flustered and slightly sweating because of the games with the kids, but he looked perfect. The sun had made the freckles over his nose a bit darker and he hadn't shaved in this days. Plus, his curls were getting longer and longer.

He caught me staring and I looked away. I heard him chuckle softly before dropping his arm around the back of my chair. Smooth.

I saw Michelle rolle her eyes with a smile.

"Has Abi told you she is a botanist?"

The two women gasped.

"What is a botanist?" Isaac found this more interesting than the barbecue and had left Michael, Blake and Joe to it.

"It's a scientific that studies plants." Grace explained and I nodded.

"I only studied because Charlotte made me do it, though"

"Oh, look. Something else you have in common." Michelle said.

"Have they told you how they made me go through those years of high school? They made me sweat and spend long nights studying"

"That's not true. He spent those years getting himself in problems and partying." Grace added.

"I can confirm that. He was the loud weirdo who was always in detention." Michael said.

"I was a weirdo too. But I didn't got myself in problems. I was always studying."

"Studying plants?" Isaac asked.

"Yes."

"That's what you have to do." Michelle warned his son.

He chuckled and looked at Daniel.

"But riding dirt bikes is funnier!"

"No it's not!" Grace insisted.

They were all so fun. Charlotte would definitely like them.

"I prefer growing plants" Izzy added.

I smiled at her.

"Charlotte is your aunt, right?" Grace asked.

"She is."

"Danny told me, I hope you have no problem with it."

"Oh no, don't worry."

Daniel tightened his arm around me and I sighed in pleasure. I wanted to lean closer to him and lay my head on his shoulder. I felt welcomed and loved by the family.

"I'm so happy you are here" Danny whispered in my ear when the conversation drifted to something else.

When I turned, my nose brushed his for a second. I swallowed hard.

"I'm happy you asked me to come"

"I wanted to here. I really wanted you here."

I threaded my fingers with his and he smiled while looking down. It felt huge for me, these words, the actions. Everything. I wanted to feel loved and it that moment I was.

"Uncle Dan!" Izzy made grabby hands, but Dan was already holding Isaac.

"Hey, can you?"

I nodded and put Izzy on my lap, you got comfortable and started talking nonstop.

The day went like that, the Ricciardos being awesome, loving and caring; Lewis, Blake and Michael treating me as a long time friend; and Daniel... Oh Daniel. He was more than perfect. So so perfect. Almost unbelievable. Because when you hadn't been treated nicely, that kind of affection felt strange.

I learnt that they had a farm. Joe had a wine business, which he owned the 80% and Danny the 20%. It was a surprise, but it suited him.

My time to go arrived and Lewis decided to tag along so I could drop him at his flat. I had no problem with it.

But when I was saying my goodbyes and wishing them a good fly home, a pair of blue eyes looked at me full of tears. Oh no, don't cry or I'll cry too.

Then she sobbed and everyone looked down at her.

"Isabelle..."

"I don't want her to leave"

Daniel picked her on his arms and wrapped her tight in a hug. I caressed her back.

"Isabelle..."

"Izzy, sweety. She has to go home and take care of all the plants." Michelle tried to calm her down, but she was sobbing on Danny's neck.

I felt so bad.

"I don't want to leave, I want to stay here!"

Daniel closed his eyes and took a deep breath. When he opened them, they were watery.

Oh no. Oh. Fuck. No.

"Izzy hey. Isabelle. Look at me" He said.

The little girl looked at him.

"You know when my birthday is, right?"

"The one. On July."

"That's right" Daniel smiled. "And you know what else?"

She shook her head.

"I will go home for my birthday."

"You are coming to Perth?!" Isaac asked happy.

It was short of a surprise for everyone. They all gasped and smiled.

"I will go to celebrate my birthday with you. It was a surprise, but I suppose it isn't anymore."

Isabelle touched his nose and frowned.

"How much time?"

"Till I go? Not even two months."

Izzy nodded but she was still pouting.

"Can Abi come?"

I blushed hard and they all looked at me.

Daniel gave me a look. A no pressure look.

"I don't know if I can, Izzy. I have to take care of my plants. But I will give Uncle Dan some seeds so you can grow your own at home"

She dried her tears.

"I'll miss you, Abi."

"I'll miss you too, sweety."

She opened her arms for me to hug her, which I did. She was still on Danny's arms so it was a bit difficult.

When she pulled back, she hid on Danny's neck again. Her little body was shaking because she had started crying again. Danny kissed her cheek.

Isaac touched my leg and asked for a hug too.

"See you soon, Isaac"

He smiled.

"Bye bye"

"I'll walk you to the car." Danny said to Lewis and me.

Still with Izzy on his arms, he went outise with us. Lewis gave us some space.

"I'll talk to you." He said.

"Of course. Call me if you need me." I whispered.

He nodded. Maybe he missed them and didn't want to be alone. Maybe it was enough with Mike and Blake. But I wanted to at least offer it.

"Okay. See you soon."

I got on my tip toes and kissed his cheek.

Izzy looked up and pressed her head on Danny's cheek.

"See you soon, Izzy"

"Say bye to Abi."

"Bye bye, Abi.

I told them goodbue from the car again and once we were away, Lewis spoke.

"What a day, huh?"

"What a day, yes"

Here it is. Some fluff after today's shitty race.

Next part: Dew on the Vine.

[creaturecosmo]

TW: angst, depression, death mention (past), Steve Needs A Hug And Some Damn Therapy

Note: I wrote this in early 2023 on twt and wanted to add it here as well! It's heavily inspire by the song "Numb Little Bug" by Em Beihold, as you'll see by the initial dialogue.

Steve and Robin laying on the hood of his car car by the quarry and Steve says, "Do you ever get a little bit tired of life, like you're not really happy but- but you don't wanna die. Like you're hanging by a thread but you gotta survive?"

"Yeah, you gotta survive." Robin counts the stars as she adds, "It's kinda like your body's in the room but you're not really... there."

"Or you have empathy but you don't really care. Like you're fresh out of love-"

"But it's in the air!" she huffs.

Steve sighs, voice soft and hesitant as he says, "Am I past repair?"

Robin sits up on her elbows, heartbreak in her wide eyes and soft frown. "Steve..."

"I just-" Steve sits up, throwing his hands in the air. "I don't care anymore, Robs! I can't! I keep slapping bandaids on gaping bullet wounds and I'm starting to run out of bandaids and having to use dirty clothes." He buries his face in his hands.

After a heavy sigh, he continues, "The people I love are dying, Robin. And I haven't done a damn thing to save them and I'm starting to wonder if I'm only making everything worse. If I should just... quit while I'm ahead."

Looking to the starry sky, he laughs wetly. "But that would make me psycho." He looks to his soulmate with a wry smile. "Wouldn't it. And we don't have time for that."

Tears drip down Robin's freckled cheeks. She's gorgeous in the moonlight, though the sorrow hallows something in Steve's chest.

"Steve-"

"Steve, Robin? Come in, Steve and Robin!" Dustin's voice crackles over the radio on the ground.

Steve looks away, wiping at his face and sighing. The emotions go back in their box and he gives his favorite person a sardonic smile.

"Duty calls, Rob."

[sinagwrites]

days of the past future

Dear future self,

How are you? If you're reading this, I hope you're still alive. I'm not okay and I haven't slept for 2 days straight. Jade's sleeping pills aren't helping me at all. I have tons of reviewers with me right now. I still don't have friends, I still have my curfew (lola's been so disappointed at me for coming home 5 minutes late from my curfew), I still have grades to maintain, and a mom to thank. Screw the traffic in Mendiola, she thinks I'm lying and cut my classes because of that 1D event that I told her about. Mom told me not to mind it over Skype, but you know her, she's disappointed too. I kind'a wish I went there instead if I knew she'd react this way. I'm barely hanging by a thread, trying my best to survive and there are days when I can't seem to compose myself.

I hope you're now waking up to the sound of the dogs barking in your vet clinic... video-calling Josh about how Manila is compared to Denmark. I hope your car enjoys the traffic of Manila knowing that lola's waiting for you at home.

I'll do my best to give that life to you, I promise. I hope you're smiling while you're reading this and telling yourself that you're finally okay. I wrote this email as a reminder that I need to strive harder so I won't fail you... so you can live.

Dear old self,

I'm sorry it took a while for me to compose the perfect words to reply. I was stuck between the lines, wondering if you would be condescending or patronizing me but I found my ink to write back.

I know you believe that it's not a good habit to look back in the past so you tried to dig for goals of where I will be in the future. I am sorry to disappoint you but things didn't go as you planned.

I haven't slept in two days because I had tons of work to do. I work 8 hours a day at home and does podcasts at night hoping I could help people like you. I know how much you loved to write and most days, if not everyday, I still do.

One direction went on hiatus a few months after you wrote that email. You cried a bucket of tears but no worries, you're okay after.

At 18, you decided to be independent and move out of the house instead of going to Europe. You didn't graduate and granny was disappointed... but no worries, you worked your way up and proved them wrong. They trust your decisions now and mom's proud of who you became.

You don't own a coffee shop... but you met a friend who brews coffee for you and she's great. Yes, you're right. You finally learned the art of making friends.

You didn't become a vet but you have dogs now. They feel so warm, love to cuddle, and the other one's turning two next month.

You didn't end up with Josh. He's still in Italy, finishing his studies with Ash, and I wanna pat you a good job for letting him go. He's happy now.

You fell in love a lot of times and got hurt, mentally, physically, emotionally but learned. You're currently dating a man filled with tattoos. I know, I know, you hate men with tattoos... but trust me, he's okay.

It all made sense to me now. I can vividly remember you writing that letter with the intention of looking back at it one day and so I can tell you that you made it... and guess what? You did. You survived... and somehow deep inside, I know that's all you ever wanted.

PS: I hope you can hug lolo before leaving the hospital for work at September 2022.

I know it may not change things, but I still hope you do.

I guess the only thing that has not changed is the fact the I still hate spoilers and I hope you don't hate me.

[tojikai]

(My very detailed rant on the latest chapter of PM. I apologize again for the length, I wrote an entire essay)

So it wasnt just a kiss, a simple peck on the lips that Satoru would be shocked about and regret later it was a full on makeout session, and he still had the audacity to reassure Y/n he never cheated. Disgusting.

I really love the way you described the car scene with Satoru and Rie, it made me feel like I was supposed to understand Rie, to pick her side after listening to how she felt at the beginning. But all it did was make me hate her and Satoru more. For one, Rie is desperate, she didn't describe what she found enticing about Satoru, she just described the look in his eyes and how it made her feel. She wants attention and affection from anyone that will give it to her. I dont think she feels guilty because she took Satoru away from Y/n. But, infact its the opposite. I think she feels guilty because she feels no remorse for the damage she has caused.

And Satoru, I hate him even more. The way he so easily got lost in Rie's "charm" angered me to no end. FIVE YEARS in a relationship with Y/n and when a simple high school crush shows up, he's head over heels for her and forgetting about Y/n.

In situations like these, where Satoru childishly succumbed to his feelings. I feel like its better to listen to your brain instead of your heart. Asking questions like…

"Do I see a future with this person" "Am I going to regret what im doing" "Is it really worth it"

Because in the end, he did regret it. Filled with nothing but guilt, and his relationship with his bestfriends are hanging by a thread.

Rie being so immensely hurt by the truth of the situation coming out of Shoko and Suguru's mouths is insane to me. I understand sometimes that some people don't understand the issue of a situation until it's told to their face. But, she literally asks why they care so much about Y/n and not her. Acting as though shes not the bad guy

She tries so hard to be the good girl in this situation, and the hero for Satoru, but all shes really doing is making everything worse. In all honesty, Rie is like a side character that doesn't really matter in the story but was placed there for us to hate.

I usually try to see everyones pov in a story before I downright hate them, but reading Rie's side of the story, and her overflowing jealousy over Y/n, she has no good side to her. There is nothing for me to sympathize about with her.

ESPECIALLY, with the way she continuously reminds us about her growing insecurity of Satoru leaving her for Y/n. I just can't feel bad for her. Because in the end she put herself in this situation. She chose to kiss someone who has a girlfriend. She chose to date that same cheater.

I'm not saying anyone should have to go through this, but again, that brings me back to my "think with your brain instead of your heart"

The argument Rie and Satoru had in their car -albeit horrible for me to do- had me smiling. They are already tearing apart and I loved watching it.

When Satoru brought up why he was mad to Rie, and her excuse was "i didn't even know about it" was so annoying. No one asked if you knew that Y/n was aware of the kiss. This is about why you told a person feeling pain over something you caused, would want to hear about their past relationship that they were trying to heal from, as soon as waking up from a traumatic experience. STOP PLAYING THE VICTIM

OMG JAW DROPPED THE AUDACITY OF THIS GIRL (im writing all of this as im reading) SHE HAD THE AUDACITY TO SAY THAT Y/N WAS PURPOSELY HARMING HERSELF TO GET SATORU'S ATTENTION Are you insane. After observing everything that Shoko and Suguru have done for Y/n up until this point you described her as being kind, and then you say this. STOP TRYING TO BLAME Y/N Y/N ISNT THE ISSUE HERE SHE HAS DONE NOTHING TO YOU GUYS STOP MAKING IT SEEM LIKE IT

I understand you're hurt and insecure, but bringing someone who has done nothing wrong into an argument between you and Satoru is so horrible. You have every right to feel the way you do, but putting the blame on Y/n instead of questioning Satoru is irrational

If Y/n does get with someone at the end of this. I hope its after a few years or months. I just need a time skip. She needs time to heal. To find the person she was before the heartbreak, to find the Y/n before Satoru. She just needs to learn to live without Satoru, and I wish the best for her.

She definitely needs that vacation

oooh wow, i see your point. but Rie isn't really just there for you guys to hate, she and satoru embodies what i always say, "strong feelings or emotions can be blinding," her actions and words are driven by it, which connects to what you said, "think with the brain and not the heart," i love that. our heart or feelings is something out of our control, so we shouldn't trust it so much. following it can lead to a lot of things that we might regret later on. and you're right !! yn definitely needs a vacation after all of that :')) this is a great take !!

[batsandbugs]

prompt: Marinette waking Damian up at 2:26 am because they ran out of food so an impromptu night on the town/mcdonald run and he's 'moody' the entire time and yeah

Heh... this has been in my inbox forever, kinda forgot about, and then I didn't have a good idea. Then I had a stroke of inspiration and wrote it all at once. It's not exactly what was asked for, but I'm pretty happy with it. So, uh sorry @animeshitpostinng... enjoy I guess!

Or you can read it here on ao3!

Late Night Bagel Adventures

Damian emerges from sleep to a small hand pushing against his shoulder. He inches away from it and buries deeper into the warm covers, chasing the fading ebb of unconsciousness.

"~Damian~ ~Damian~" Marinette calls in a sing-songy voice.

He groans, rolling over and cracking open one eye. His fiance's face is lit by the faint light coming from the doorway. Her eyes are big and pleading and he immediately knows he is not going back to sleep any time soon.

"What?" he mumbles.

"There's no food in the fridge. Or cupboards."

He resists the urge to shoot her a death glare. "Darling we moved in this morning. We are going shopping tomorrow."

She tilts her head and pouts. "But I'm hungry now."

The foggy grip of sleep disappears entirely - he blames years of awareness training for the light switch controlling his state of consciousness - and he pushes himself up on one arm. "So go order something delivered."

"But it's a waste of money."

He sighs. "Marinette, dearest, you are an internationally famed designer. I am the son of a billionaire. We can spare the extra cash to have someone bring us food at-" he glances over at the digital clock on his bedside table "-two-fifteen in the morning."

"I want a Dani's Bagel."

Admittedly, Dani's was open twenty-four hours a day, so that was not an all too unreasonable request. Except Dani's did not do delivery. And with every bagel made to order, it really was best if you ate them right away.

"Walmart?" he asks, hoping against hope such a compromise would satisfy.

"Not as close as Dani's," she responds with absolute ruthlessness. "Plus I'm craving a cheddar jalapeno bagel, with salmon and cream cheese and capers."

Damian screws up his nose. He loves this woman, but sometimes she comes up with the oddest food combinations. He groans, flopping back onto the bed. "You could go yourself?"

"Pleeeease," Marinette begs, with a hopeful smile. "I don't wanna be alone."

He revels in the heated blankets for one last moment, before throwing off the covers and rolling to his feet. "Fine, fine. But I will not change clothes." He clicks on the lamp and searches for his glasses. He does not have the patience to put back in his contacts.

"Yeah, neither am I," says Marinette, bounding off the bed. She grabs a giant hoodie - one of his - and slips it on over her tank top. Blue sleep pants with little spools of thread and sewing needles cover her legs. "But you should grab a jacket, it's kinda chilly."

"Uh-huh," he grunts, slipping his phone and wallet into his pocket. He grabs another hoodie and slips it on. Marinette beams and bounces out of the room. He trudges behind her. How she contained so much energy after spending the whole day moving in, he had no clue.

By the time he reaches the front entryway, Marinette already tying her laces on and her purse hanging off her shoulder. She's put on a beanie on her head, appropriate considering it is New Jersey in November. She offers him one and he shoves it on his head, not wanting to even contemplate the mess his hair might be after being asleep.

He slips on his own shoes and catches the car keys when Marinette throws them over to him. Locking their new apartment behind they journey out into the night, heading down the hall to the elevator.

Marinette hugs his arm on the way down, laying her head on his shoulder. "Thanks, Dames," she says softly.

"Tt. Yeah, yeah," he mutters, kissing the top of her head. The things he does for love.

They hurry quickly from the warmly lit lobby to the cold dark car. The heater turns the space toasty warm in a matter of seconds and then they are coasting down the street. Dani's is thankfully close by. Damian may not have been thrilled about being dragged from his warm bed and much-deserved sleep, but the sound of food is appealing.

Here in the outer edges of Gotham - not even passing into Gotham proper, they would have to cross the bridge - the city is calm and normal. Just another late night on the town; a few cars passing by, only a handful of lights on in the windows above, all green stoplights, and the faint sound of a siren in the distance. Meanwhile the city proper looms in the distance, bright shining lights against a dark starless sky.

The ride passes in companionable silence, and soon enough they pull into a parking lot next to a small strip retail space. Dani's Bagels sits on the corner edge lit up in cream and purple. Marinette smiles brightly at him as he turns off the car and practically scrambles out of her seat. He follows far more sedately and enters behind her as the bell above the door rings.

"Welcome to Dani's!" calls a voice far too cheerful for two-thirty in the morning. Despite the dim overhead lights, Damian can still hear them buzzing. Even the soft music in the background grates like nails grating on a chalkboard. Admittedly, the store smells delicious, like fresh-baked bread and basil, but all Damian wants is to pull up his hoodie and close the drawstring around his face.

"Heya Litzy!" Marinette calls back. Damian resists the childish urge to stick out his tongue. He is a grown, twenty-six-year-old man, and his fiance is hungry, so endure he must. He fought against aliens, endured torture at the hands of allies and enemies alike, and pushed his body to extreme limits. A late-night food run is nothing.

But he really wants to be at home, curled up around Marinette's space heater warmth, and asleep.

"Hey, mon cher you want your normal?" Marinette asks him.

"Mm-hmm." She knows his order, it never changes. Unlike Marinette who tries a new creation every time she comes in.

She kisses his cheek. "Go take a seat on the couch, I'll order for us."

"Great." He slips away and heads over to their normal haunt, a corner couch in the back. The leather is worn and faded and Damian settles into the side with a contented sigh. He wishes he could turn off how his brain immediately searches for danger and potential weapons and avenues of defense and attack, but it does. And although his body is begging him to go back to sleep, he is far too alert to even doze.

Marinette joins him a few minutes later, curling into his side and laying her head on his shoulder. "Wait," he says. "I forgot to give you my card."

She rolls her eyes. "Damian I'm an internationally famed designer," she repeats back with a teasing smile. "I'm sure I can spare the cash to grab us bagels. Besides, it was my idea for a food run. Your chivalry is noted and lovely, but unneeded."

He grumbles, but since the food is already paid for, he will refrain from pushing.

They settle in quiet, Damian fully appreciative that there is no one here but them. Marinette draws lines on the back of his hand with her finger. Sizzling oil pops in the background as their bagels cook.

Damian almost smiles at the normalcy of it all. This kind of life he could never have imagined for himself ten or even five years ago, but now? Living outside the city proper, with his fiance, in their own apartment, both still in the hero game but with their own lives taking importance? It was not a dream come true, because he never could have imagined to dream of a chance so sweet and so desired in the first place.

Lost in his thoughts he did not hear the worker call out their order, and so the loss of heat from Marinette leaving his side jolts him back to the real world. His mind fog clears as Marinette returns, slipping off her shoes and sitting cross-legged on the couch holding two baskets with their bagels prepared hot and steaming.

"One asiago bagel with plain cream cheese," she says handing him his basket. "And one cheddar and jalapeno bagel with jalapeno flavored cream cheese, salmon, and capers." She grins delightedly, sinking her mouth into a big bite.

"You have terrible taste," he grumbles, taking a bit of his own. Warm bread and gooey cheese and cool cream cheese hit his taste buds and he sighs in delight. Damn, no one else does a bagel like Dani's.

"I don't know," Marinette says, munching on her monstrosity. "I think I have pretty good taste. I picked you, didn't I?"

"Eh, a debatable decision."

She swats his arm. "Stop it, you. I picked our apartment?"

"Arguably also debatable. I still say it is too much space for only the two of us. With four rooms? An office, your workroom, and our bedroom are plenty. We hardly want to encourage anyone to stay over. The manor is close enough."

Marinette shrugs. "Oh, I thought we could use it for something other than a guest bedroom."

"Like what? A movie room?" He takes another bite of his bagel.

"How about a regular bedroom?"

Damian pauses. "Are we getting a roommate? I have no wish for a roommate. We moved out of the manor to have our own space." They would have moved out two years ago when Damian finished his Master's degree, but a serious injury placed his father out of commission, and it was far easier to run vigilante operations out of the cave while living close by.

"Eh, you could call it a roommate. We'll do a lot more late-night snack runs too." Marinette turns to grab something from her purse.

Damian finds himself confused, what in the world could she be talking about?

She hands him a small object, and Damian's befuddled mind takes a second to work out what it is.

"Marinette?" he croaks out.

"Yep," she says calmly.

"We are not getting a roommate."

"Nope," she says popping the p.

"We are having a baby," he says shakily, looking at the positive pregnancy test he holds in his hand.

Marinette holds back a smile and looks at him with wide eyes. "I mean, yeah kinda. If you want a baby?" she asks.

His heartbeat shoots through the roof, and Damian is pretty sure he stopped breathing. His brain can barely handle the number of thoughts swirling through it, and under all of it, there is one thrumming line humming. A baby, we are having a baby.

"I- I yeah. I-," he looks up from the test and to Marinette; his love, and the light of his world, and smiles. "If, if you-"

"Oh yeah," she laughs, her smile splitting her face, as suddenly all her energy this morning finally makes sense. "Yeah, I really want a baby. I know we've only mentioned it in passing, and the wedding is two months away, and we just moved to our own space. But... yeah. I really want them."

"Okay," he says still finding it hard to breathe properly.

"Okay," she says back, and if he lives another fifty years - not likely with his chosen lifestyle, but regardless - he will never find a more beautiful sight than her smile - a mix of overwhelmed joy and utter relief. His eyes dart down to Marinette's stomach, hidden in the folds of his hoodie and his hands twitch before he can stop them. Marinette though reads him like a book - as she always has - and grabs his hands, bringing them to her stomach.

"I'm not showing yet. I think I'm only about six weeks along, my period's pretty regular so I was concerned when it didn't show up. At first, I thought it could be related to... you know, our nightly activities. But nothing had happened. So," she shrugs, "I bought a test. Actually, I bought three tests. All of them positive."

He slowly rubs his thumb over the soft, well-worn fabric. "Anybody else know?" he asks.

Marinette snorts, shaking her head with a fond grin. "Damian, who else was I going to tell first?"

He shrugs his shoulders. "Whoever you want. Your mother?"

She leans in and captures his mouth with a soft kiss. "No, you silly. There was no one else I was going to tell first." She pauses, tilting her head with a chagrined look. "Well, that's not entirely true. I guess my doctor knew before you did. I scheduled an appointment for Wednesday."

Damian shakes his head. It did not count. "Can I come?"

She giggles, "Yes you can come. You can be involved in everything. It's our baby." She snuggles a bit closer, and he presses a kiss to the top of her head.

"Our baby," he muses, still hardly believing it.

The bell rings above the door, breaking the two of them out of their private cocoon. A group of young adults walk in, clearly looking for a snack after a long night of dancing at a club or party or another event. Their loud arguing is enough to intrude on Damian's hazy sense of contentment, and he turns to Marinette.

"You want to head home?" he asks. Already questions form in his head. Will it be a boy or a girl? One baby or maybe more like twins or triplets? What color were they going to paint the nursery? How long would Marinette stay out in the field? Instinctively, he wants to wrap her in blankets and not let her out of the house, but that was a one-way ticket to an ass-kicking, so he tampered it down.

Marinette shoves the last bite of her bagel into her mouth, while his bagel sits half-eaten and cold after being forgotten in the announcement's excitement. "Yeah," she says. "I'm tired."

"Oh really, whyever might that be?" he teases rising from the couch and offering her his hand. She follows, and even though her hair is a mess and she's wearing pajamas, with not a scrap of makeup or refinement in sight, she remains an absolute beauty to behold. "Perhaps after spending half the day trekking our belongings across town and up five floors, waking up your poor fiance, and begging for food at two in the morning, one might just be a little tired?"

"Don't forget the pregnancy announcement," she adds, as they place their baskets on the counter.

"I am not forgetting anytime soon." They walk out of the store, and he unlocks the car, opens Marinette's door, and closes it once she's settled in the passenger seat. He looks into the night before taking a deep breath of cold air, before climbing in himself.

"So..." Marinette smiles. "Good enough reason for a late-night snack run?"

"The best, I think." He turns on the car and relishes in the warm heat pouring from the vents. "You are going to end up being an absolute menace with your cravings?"

"Oh without a doubt," she says without a hint of sympathy. "Maman's stories from her pregnancy are horrid. She ate everything from mint chocolate cookies, to pickles straight out of the jar, to just wasabi on a cracker." Then she winces. "On the other hand, her morning sickness was awful, and had horribly swollen feet and basically didn't get out of bed for the latter half of her pregnancy. Which was longer than normal because I was two weeks late."

His chest aches in sympathy, and he looks at her belly. "You will end up driving your mother and I up a wall before the end of this, won't you little one." He glances up, Marinette's eyes shine with unshed tears and a blissful smile on her face. "But it hardly matters because then you will be here, and we will love you regardless."

Marinette leans across the dash and catches his lips with hers, and its sweetness and warmth and everything Damian scorned for most of life. It took years and so much effort to slowly work around to the idea he could have it too, and when he found it with Marinette he grabbed onto it with two hands and refused to let go.

It was the best decision he'd ever made.

She pulls back from the kiss and touches her forehead to his. "Love you, Damian." She runs a hand over her stomach. "We'll be fine, right?"

He grabs her other hand and places a kiss upon it. "We will do our best which is all we can do. Worst-case scenario we can assure ourselves whatever we do, it can not possibly be as bad as my childhood."

Marinette does a half-laugh, half-groan at his comment. "Your mother's not allowed anywhere near them," she states, with a fierce protectiveness in her voice. Marinette always expressed extreme dismay for the trauma of his childhood and blamed the fault upon his mother. Damian, no matter how much he insisted he had grown past those hurts, had never been able to convince her to anything more than curt civility with Talia.

He tried not to linger on the warmth flaring in his chest every time Marinette defends him. Even against things he was fully capable of defending himself from.

"I do not think we will have much of a say, on that end of things." He already obtained assurances the League would stay far away from his wedding, but the birth of a child might spur them into action. "But we will remain vigilant regardless." He pauses. "When shall we tell the others?"

She pulls back from him, as he puts the car into motion. "I figured I could call my parents today, or well later tonight after they're through the morning rush at the store. And then we're headed to the Manor in two days for family dinner, and most everyone's supposed to be there, so we could tell them then. And after we can announce it to our friends on our socials. We'll survive the press hounding for a few days, but then it'll be the weekend, and something new will come up to distract them."

"You sure you want to tell the press before the wedding?"

She nods her head. "Yeah, my stomach should still be mostly flat even by then, but I'll alter the dress just to make sure, but if even a single person hints or slips they'll be on us like sharks with blood."

"Fair," says Damian, turning down the street to their apartment building. "But for now it is just us."

Marinette reaches for his other hand, and leans her head, catching the edge of his shoulder and sighing. "Yeah just the three of us."

Three of us.

Damian has never liked the sound of anything more.

0-0-0-0-0-0

Thanks for reading, if you like what I do reblogs, likes, and asks feed my soul, and if you feel you can spare a couple extra dollars visit my kofi account here. Thanks for reading!

[iwonderifthatisart]

so, uh, this gif set by @originaltimetravelkid inspired me and i wrote a little drabble while i was on a teams conference (who needs work, am i right?)

(read on ao3)

„Shit.“

„What?“

There is a pause.

“Kinda horny right now.”

Daniel looks up and catches sight of Johnny spitting onto the ground. He's dirty and bloody but there's intensity in his eyes and—

“What?”

“Huh?” Johnny's eyes snap up. Looks like his brain caught up to his mouth.

“What you said. About—” Daniel gestures around, chest still heaving from the fight. “—feeling horny? Why are you feeling horny?”

“Aren’t you?”

“You—we—there was nothing—” Daniel gives up.

The tilt in Johnny's head is the only sign that shows he might regret letting that slip, but he just stalks past Daniel to get to the car. Daniel can do nothing but follow. “Johnny.”

Johnny doesn’t open the car door, though, just flops heavily against it. He groans, shakes his head. “It's just. It's karate, man!”

Daniel is reeling. “How in the world does karate lead to being horny?”

Now Johnny looks like Daniel is the crazy one. “Okay, are you serious? You never got horny while doing karate?”

“Am I— Are you serious? And stop saying horny.”

“Like, it's obviously not all the time,” Johnny continues. “But, uh. Just when you’re sparring, it's the adrenaline, the concentration.” He wipes his nose and points back to the garage. “And, y’know, whatever this shit was.”

It's ridiculous. Ridiculous! Of course Daniel has never been turned on by fighting, that would be insane. Like, what? Sure, his heartrate kicks up and he’s dizzy but his senses are sharpened and there's that single-minded focus on the next move, how to block a punch, how to throw one. And that fight just then? To be completely tuned in to Johnny's actions next to him, fighting against the same enemy, the rush that comes with it, looking into his eyes and seeing the same fire—

“You’re thinking about it.” Johnny sounds insufferably smug.

Daniel isn't horny for karate, no that’s—he’s crazy for even considering it.

“I know what's going on in that head.”

“No, you don’t.”

“Yeah, no. You’re thinking about getting off. That shit got you hot.”

Absolutely ridiculous.

“Shut the fuck up,” Daniel says, and there's heat in it but he doesn’t know what kind of heat and that makes him angry for some reason. “You're just, you're weird, Johnny! Who gets horny for karate?”

Johnny takes a step forward, eyes on Daniel and he looks like he wants to eat him up. It's then that Daniel remembers the thrill of fighting Johnny in high school, when he wasn’t paralyzed by fear; he remembers Amanda's laugh as Daniel made her put on a gi and how she looked when he taught her a few basic moves. How the air changed when she got the hang of it and they really went for it, how the dojo mats felt under his sweaty skin as she sighed into his mouth—

He kind of realizes that the feeling is oddly similar to how he feels when he goes for a casual-but-not-so-casual sparring session with Johnny after a few beers. The straining muscles, the banter, the electric atmosphere in the air.

Huh.

Johnny smirks, a little dangerous. “I’m not the only weird one here, am I?”

Daniel sways, looks at Johnny's lips, smeared with blood. “Shut up,” he hisses and grabs the front of his shirt pulls him close. The kiss is harsh, rough and not very good. Their noses knock together awkwardly. Johnny winces but doesn’t stop and then he tilts his head and it lights up and gets good.

How’s that for horny, how’s that, asshole!

Johnny groans as Daniel pushes him against the car, threads his hands through his hair. Johnny’s not far behind and his tongue is slick and hot in Daniel's mouth and it's so good, what the fuck.

“What the fuck,” he says out loud this time and Johnny laughs breathlessly and gropes Daniel's ass, hard, and yeah ok.

Maybe karate makes him horny.

Just a little.

[sgtbradfords]

I just had an idea and I don’t think anyone wrote about it yet 🙈

SE2E12 when Lucy takes down that guy at the speed dating place

Any chance you would write something on that?

Lucy shutting down, nayla and Harper not being able to help her and having to call Tim to come and help

This turned out really cute and I am kinda happy with how it turned out... I hope you enjoy anon! :)

Lucy Chen thought they would be going to a bar or a club for her first girl’s night out with Nyla Harper and Angela Lopez. But no, what the two officers had planned was so much worse.

Speed dating.

As soon as she read the white words on the hideous pink sign, her fight or flight response kicked in. She wanted to run but knowing her two friends, they would never allow that. She tried talking her way out of it, didn’t work. So, she took the only option left, being to rope them into their own scheme.

‘Trust your judgement.’ They said. ‘Control the environment.’

‘Bullshit.’ Lucy thought as she took a seat, a sip of liquid courage coursing through her veins.

The night had started off decent, easily picking out the creeps to be vague to and actively ignoring the weirdos who sent a shiver down her spine. Though, she was not much better, as she came off a little too forward with the men that sat down in the seat across from her.

The buzzer sounded, announcing the end of the night as she and the last prospect, Isaiah stood. He told her he had a good evening, to which she off-handedly agreed. She heard him before she could see him as he reached out, pulling at the loose thread on her sweater.

She reacted instantly, his hands were moving towards her and all she could think about was the last time a set of unwanted hands approached her.

Lucy had him on the floor with his hands secured behind his back in eight seconds flat, Nyla and Angela running over when Lucy laid him out.

“Hey.” Nyla told her placing a hand on her shoulder, bringing her out of her daze. “You’re ok. It’s alright.”

She could hear the shrieks of people being startled around her, Angela’s voice foggy as she spoke to the man she just laid out. Her breathing increased rapidly, adrenaline coursing through her veins as her heart pounded in her chest.

Lucy never heard the question that Nyla was asking as she pulled out of the hold the other woman had on her arm. Her body moved on it’s own accord, her feet carrying her quickly, returning her to the car she had vacated not even an hour earlier, pulling on the handle of the car, sitting down in the passenger seat before she hit the automatic lock button, locking the doors.

“Hey, Chen?” said Nyla as she knocked on the window.

Lucy took a shaky breath to steady herself, focusing on grounding her mind.

“Lucy?” Angela asked as she pulled on the handle of the locked door, hitting the button of her car, unlocking it.

Lucy’s right hand hovered over the switch panel, pressing the button to lock the doors back.

Angela hit it again, only for the occupant of the vehicle to lock it back.

“Seriously. What do we do?” she asked looking over the top of the vehicle.

Nyla pulled out her phone, her thumb scrolling on the screen before pressing the glass, moving the phone to her ear. “Hey. You busy? Yes, I know you’re off duty. We’ve kinda got a situation. I mean kinda like you’ll find out when you get here. We’re in the pay by the hour parking lot on 42nd street. You can’t miss us.” She said before ending the call, placing the phone back into the back pocket of her jeans. “Well, this has been an experience.”

“He on his way?”

Nyla nodded, leaning back on the car. “Relax, she’s not going to budge.”

Angela glanced into the car, standing between the car and the one next to it, keeping an eye on the woman sitting in the passenger seat.

“You meet anyone interesting?”

Nyla snorted, telling Angela about the guy who got up and ran from the table holding a hand to his mouth, and the one she thoroughly grossed out, telling her the stories she had told them.

“What about you?” Angela had just asked when a familiar truck pulled in off the road.

Tim Bradford pulled his truck into the parking lot, stopping at the automated machine to pay for parking, grabbing his ticket before pulling up behind the car he knew all too well. He put the vehicle in park, pressing the button to roll down the passenger side window. “I’m not going to be your DD Harper.”

Nyla walked over to the truck, resting her arms on the sill of the window. “We may have done something stupid.”

“Define stupid.”

Angela walked over, joining Nyla as she looked at the driver guiltily. “I may have pushed Lucy too hard.”

Tim’s face dropped, concern quickly taking over before he could mask the emotion. “What did you do?” he asked as he unbuckled, opening the door of the truck.

Angela shared a look with Nyla, “We may have gone speed dating.”

Tim stared her as he rounded the truck. “You what?”

“She agreed, after some encouragement and bribing.”

“Speed dating.” Tim said as he ran a hand over his face. “What happened?”

“She had a loose string on her shirt and one of the imbeciles tried to pull it without telling her.” Nyla began telling him.

“Then she laid him out. It was impressive really.”

“Not the point Angela. Listen, we tried to calm her down, but she ran out of there and locked herself in the car.”

Sighing Tim moved towards the driver’s side of the car. “Unlock the car.”

Angela hit the button, Tim opening the door simultaneously, getting in behind the wheel before he pulled the door close.

Lucy stared ahead as the vehicle shook, her training officer sliding into the seat next to her, his chest against the steering wheel as his left-hand moved to his side, fumbling with the buttons on the side of the seat.

“How the hell does Ang drive like this?” he grumbled as the seat began sliding all the way back, his long legs slowly unfolding. “So, what happened boot?”

Lucy held a hand to her face, her elbow resting in-between the glass of the window and the door as she continued staring ahead, watching the things moving around the outside world of the vehicle.

“You’re uncharacteristically quiet.”

“Are you here as my boss or as my friend?” She asked, moving her hand down from her face as she began to wring her fingers.

Tim thought for a second, hesitating before answering. “Friend.” They were friends and they were coworkers but somehow, they were also more than that, their working chemistry setting the base of their friendship outside the four sides of the shop.

“I thought I was ready.” She sighed.

“For?” he asked, raising an eyebrow.

“Something more.”

Tim nodded. “It’s only been two months boot. Your recovery isn’t something that will fix itself overnight.”

Lucy somberly let out a lone laugh. “Like hell it will! I’m tired Tim. I’m tired of the pity, I’m tired of the looks, tired of it all. I just want to put it behind me, live a normal life.”

“I know.” He whispered. “But neither one of us has a time machine Chen.”

“Tim, it wasn’t-“

“Don’t. Don’t say it wasn’t my fault. I’m the one who- I almost lost you Lucy.” He told her, his voice cracking at the admission.

“We talked about this the other night. What happened was neither here nor there and both of us are going to have to move on from it sooner or later.”

Tim knew that his rookie was growing restless, the outcome of those twenty-four hours still eating away at her. “I think… what you need, is to find an outlet.”

“An outlet.” She stated, turning her head to face him.

“Something that takes the stress off, where your thoughts disappear and I don’t mean paintball, something a little more strenuous.”

Lucy snorted, rolling her eyes. “Isn’t that what sex is for?”

“That’s not a healthy outlet.”

“And what, Officer Bradford, is your healthy outlet?”

“I have a few, one of them being running.” He told her shrugging. “I try, every day, to run. In the morning, in the evening, doesn’t matter. If you hold onto the shit that we see on the job, you’re going to implode.”

She nodded. “So, what would you suggest?”

“Everyone’s different, you just have to find something that works for you.”

Lucy mulled over his words, silence enveloping the car before she took the opportunity to speak. “Thank you.”

“I would say anytime Chen but you’re making me miss Thursday night football.”

Lucy shoved his shoulder. “I’m sorry for ruining your Thursday with my insecurities.”

Tim flashed her a smile. “We all have our days boot. I do have to say that I wouldn’t mind seeing the video of you putting this guy in his place though.”

“What, so you can critique me?”

“No, so I can see you laying this guy out on his ass.” He said with pride in his voice. “Then critique you.”

A knock sounded on the driver side window. “If you two are done with whatever this is,” Angela said, gesturing between the two “we would like to get out of here.”

“Find an outlet boot.” He said as he pulled the handle of the door, his tall frame exiting the car. “You three text me when you get home.”

“Awwwe look Ang, I think he’s worried.” Nyla teased as Tim walked back towards his waiting truck, the man raising his right hand up the air as he flashed his middle finger.

It took several days and shifts to find what he was talking about, but as she wrapped her hands in tape, a bag of sand hanging in front of her, she took the advice given to her to heart. Lucy couldn’t help the smile that overtook her as she replayed the conversation that followed the disaster that was the other night as she began hitting the swaying bag. ‘Find an outlet boot.’

“Bring your elbow up.” A voice spoke from a few feet behind her causing her to jump.

“Giving boxing advice now are we Officer Bradford?”

Tim shrugged off the bag on his shoulder, letting it fall to the ground. “No but, I would rather you hit the bag properly than have a bummed wrist tomorrow and us get into a shootout.”

Lucy jabbed the bag. “Sounds like advice to me.”

He rolled his eyes. “Do you want my help or not?”

She stopped the swaying bag, grasping it with both hands. “Fine.”

Tim stepped closer, moving into her line of sight as he stood next to the bag. He began critiquing her, Lucy adjusting her stance and positioning countless times as he began placed a pair of boxing pads on his hands. “Enough with the bag. Hit me boot.”

“What?” she said in astonishment. “I’m not-“

“You will Chen, hit me.”

Lucy took a swing at him, missing him as he ducked. “Again.” He ordered.

She forcefully swung her right arm, her throw landing on the soft padding. “Good. Again.”

They kept it up, Tim counteracting her throws and punches, throwing in his own punches that she successfully blocked for the most part.

“See? Outlet.” He told her as he pulled a bottle of water from his bag, taking a sip.

Lucy began unwrapping her wrists, wading the tape into a ball. “Thanks, Tim.”

“You’ve got a mean right hook but your uppercut could use some work. We’ll meet back here in two days boot.” He told her, gathering his bag, moving towards the door.

“Don’t I spend enough time with you already?”

Tim turned around, smirking. “Two days boot.”

Lucy sighed, turning around mumbling under her breath. “He’s lucky I like him.”

“Heard that!” he yelled as the door closed.

[dtrhwithalex]

TV | Leverage (Season 1, Rewatch)

Rewatch of the first season of TNT's LEVERAGE (2008-2012), created by John Rogers and Chris Downey together with Dean Devlin and his production company Electric Entertainment.

In anticipation of the show's reboot / revival / sequel LEVERAGE: REDEMPTION coming to IMDbTV on 09 July this year, I am rewatching the original 77 episodes and writing about my favourite moments and things from each episode, season by season.

(Just a note, this first season was aired out of order, so the dates won't actually form a chronology, since I'm going with the intended order rather than the one they were aired in.)

101: THE NIGERIAN JOB

D: DEAN DEVLIN. W: JOHN ROGERS & CHRIS DOWNEY. Original Air Date: 07 December 2008.

I have lost count of how many times I have seen this episode (or any episodes of this show to be completely honest), but it holds up every single time. It is one of my favourite, if not the favourite TV pilot episode I have ever seen.

The way this pilot sets up who the main characters are and what the core of this show is, is simply perfect. The introduction of Nate at the bar being approached by Dubenich, then the intercut between him convincing Nate to do the job and the actual job happening -- just wonderful. The same goes for the individual introductions of the other players. Nate's comment about Parker ("no, but Parker is insane") which plants a thread for the rest of the show already, the flashbacks of each character to exemplify who they and what their talents are, combined with the episode then showing you those talents and what Nate can do with them -- which is, of course, his talent -- sets up this whole show so well.

So many seeds that come to fruition throughout the show are already planted right here. Nate's mentoring of Parker to become his eventual successor as Mastermind ("Haircuts, Parker, count the haircuts" -- "I would've missed that"), Eliot's role as protector, the iconic overhead shots and the gloating, the alternate revenue streams, "Hardison dies in Plan M" -- it's all already right here in this episode. A brilliant piece of writing. Hats off to Rogers and Downey, no questions asked.

Rewatching this episode made me think of what this show is about, in its essence. Yes, it is about standing up for those who can't do so themselves, taking on the bigger bad, showing how corrupt and terrible the world can be, but also how much good there is to still find in the world. But also, this show is about a lonely man being actively bullied into the family he didn't know he needed or wanted, but will eventually come to realise is the one thing, the only thing that is keeping him alive. LEVERAGE is the story of a man and his crusade to avenge the death of his child, but is is very much also the story of a man who finds a reason to keep getting up every morning in the four people who are on this crusade with him. And this pilot episode already holds the seed and the potential of all of that. And that is why this show is to this day still my favourite show of all time, because it is utterly perfect in every way.

102: THE HOMECOMING JOB

D: DEAN DEVLIN. W: JOHN ROGERS. Original Air Date: 09 December 2008.

I absolutely love how John Rogers was like okay first episode, some greedy asshole who does whatever he wants for his own gain, we'll take him down a notch. Episode two? Hmm, oh yeah, the government is completely corrupt, filled with rich greedy assholes who do whatever they want for their own gain and always get away with it. Not on my watch (I love him very much, thank you).

This episode, once again, so good. The re-introduction of every character in this new reality of Nate's crusade is just as brilliantly done as the original introduction of them all. Sophie at an audition (love the John Rogers cameo here) completely butchering it once again, Eliot beating up some thug, Parker stealing valuable art, and Hardison doing what he does best: creating a beautiful office-slash-home space for the team, putting his all into their backstories, the equipment, the behind-the-scenes workings of what they need to get the job done. My man.

The message of this particular episode is also just something I am very fond of. The rehab facility doctor's words in the beginning, and then in the end again -- "people don't just show up to help. that's not the way the world works" -- as well as Nate's ultimate answer to her, "so change the world." That right here is the message of this show. It's already right here, all up in your face, episode two.

I completely adore what this episode does for the character dynamics already. The detail Hardison puts into the other's backstories, the interactions around the conference table, Eliot sharing his knowledge, Nate explaining the money laundering scam, the whole thing about laws being in a wooden box, Sophie elaborating why she knew Congressman Jenkins was lying to her -- they don't just work together, they already start giving the others insight into their talents and their knowledge and share that. It's beautiful. I especially adore the shot of them at the end, everyone leaning against the car while watching Corporal Perry and the other veterans debating what to do with the money. They are already so comfortable and at ease with each other, leaning into each other's spaces. They're family. You can see it here already.

Absolutely fantastic episode. For a long time, whenever I thought about The Homecoming Job, I somehow associated a more negative emotion with it than with other episodes, but I don't quite know why, because this is a brilliant episode and I love watching it.

103: THE WEDDING JOB

D: JONATHAN FRAKES. W: CHRIS DOWNEY. Original Air Date: 13 January 2009.

We love Jonathan Frakes in this house and every single time his name shows up with the director tag on this show, I know that I will enjoy every last second of the episode I am about to watch. Frakes directed the hell outta this thing. The Wedding Job is an absolutely excellent episode. Dan Lauria as our main baddie Nicky Moscone is perfect casting and there are so many great comedic beats in the scenes with him and Nate. Everyone, generally, is so weirded out by Priest!Nate, but Moscone just takes the weirdness in stride. This episode holds a very special place in my heart because it contains the introduction of my favourite FBI duo -- McSweeten (McSweetheart, as we call him) and Taggert. I adore these two bumbling fools so much, and I am so glad they kept being brought back, because they are both just so lovely. McSweetheart especially is very dear to me because of the D.B. Cooper Job from the last season (where, I ask, do I start my McSweetheart for Leverage: Redemption campaign?). Overall just such an excellent episode, really. So many great moments between our main characters--Sophie and Nate and their little "relationship" problem, Hardison and Eliot talking about marriage, Parker pretending she was waiting in the screening room to have sex with Hardison, Hardison appreciating Eliot's cooking. I also absolutely adore the beginning, the four of them convincing Nate that Teresa is definitely the type of client they take on. And Nate's resigned "Yeah, okay, yeah. Let's go rob Nicky Moscone. A guy who kills people and lives in our city. Yeah, let's go do that" as if they weren't going to go above and beyond any of that in the five years they will spend together on this crusade of his. You're so precious, Nathan. Of course, the ending of this episode is beyond brilliant, and lives both in my heart and my head rent free. It is such a magnificent found family moment. Getting Teresa the restaurant back, the news footage regarding Ray's appeal, and of course, Eliot cooking for them all, and them celebrating together, all of them. It is such a beautiful moment.

104: THE SNOW JOB

D: TONY BILL. W: ALBERT KIM. Original Air Date: 27 January 2009.

I adore what the client says to Nate in the beginning of the episode: "You work hard, you play by the rules, but when you need help, you really need help? They let you hang. They let you hang and it's your kid who pays the price." This show hammers home its message so many times in such great character moments and it makes watching these brilliant people take on these greedy bastards and robbing them for all they've got that much sweeter. It is such a satisfying thing to watch. Especially because they're all so damn good at this.

This is a great episode but it is infinitely funnier if you know and speak German, because it makes the scenes between Sophie and Eliot absolutely hysterical. And the delivery of the line that Ute Ausgartner says when she discovers they replaced her with Sophie is just wrong enough to crack you up.

Again some wonderfully brilliant comedic beats -- the Frakes cameo in the hospital waiting room, Parker casually hanging off the ski lift, Hardison and Eliot arguing over who puts dye in the dead body, Eliot carrying off a pissed of Parker, and so many more.

This episode also, for the first time, really gives insight into Nate's drinking problem. We had the one moment in The Homecoming Job, but this episode starts to explore it more in depths. And something that I've always appreciated about this show is that it never glorifies the drinking, but Nate is also never vilified for it. It is a fact of Nate's life and they explore different aspects of it, and everything is done with such care (which does not surprise me one bit since this is John Rogers' show).

The ending of this episode is also, once again, so beautiful and nicely done. It is just so incredibly satisfying to watch these greedy bastards get what's coming to them, and to see the clients be compensated beyond anything they'd ask for.

105: THE MILE HIGH JOB

D: ROB MINKOFF. W: AMY BERG. Original Air Date: 20 January 2009.

Another fantastic episode (you will realise that I will say this about every single of the 77 episodes this show has)! Amy Berg wrote some excellent stuff for this show, and this episode is one of them. Always a lot of great character relationship moments, and absolutely brilliant comedic beats.

I am very fond of the fact that here, in the early days, we have the whole team present around the table during the client meeting. We see all their reactions and inputs here already, and not later when Nate or Hardison (usually) relays the information of their next job to the rest of the gang. It's a very lovely moment.

I am also very fond of the entire recon bit at the GenoGrow office. Sophie's French rave-girl act, the others having to climb stairs, Hardison's absence, the cut from Parker's bomb to the microwave at the HQ, Nate, Eliot and Parker yelling "Oh it's right behind us, it's chasing us!" and grabbing Sophie on the way out, meanwhile the security guys completely buying it. Absolutely brilliant, all the way through.

Both Hardison's adventure at GenoGrow as well as the others on the plane contain so many great comedic moments. Hardison's Spanish maintenance guy act, his interactions with both Cheryl and Steve (talking into the cupboard? His fake meeting and getting Steve to take a dive? The whole birthday thing? A+ all around. Amy Berg, everyone) and of course the reaction he has to the plane safely landing on the highway ("lord I was so scared, I wanna cry and call my momma" I love him so much, y'all). I also have big feelings about Nate's pep talk to Hardison, "you can do this, I trust you ... the only guy I can count on in a situation like this." Sir, I am experiencing an emotion alright.

The sequences on the plane are of course also absolutely fantastic. Nate and Sophie's domestic, Parker's day job and her interactions with Marissa, Eliot being a big softie who holds Marissa's hand all the way up to the in-flight bar and hugs the woman he sat down next to when they safely land (womaniser, big softie. tomayto, tomahto). Also big shoutout to the fake names Nate and Sophie have. We love our DOCTOR WHO references in this show. I love these nerds very much, thank you.

106: THE TWO HORSE JOB

D: CRAIG R. BAXLEY. W: MELISSA GLENN & JESSICA RIEDER (GRASL). Original Air Date: 16 December 2008.

This episode also holds a very special place in my heart because it contains the introduction of our dearly beloved antagonist, Mr Jim Sterling, the absolutely amazing Mark Sheppard. We love Sterling in this house, yessir (again, where do I have to address my Jim Sterling For Leverage: Redemption campaign to?). Every moment he is in is fantastic, but I especially adore the conversation he has with Nate at the race track (especially the "Nathan Ford is a common criminal" -- "Common. That's just hurtful" bit of it).

This, of course, is an episode by our wonder twins, Glenn and Rieder (now Grasl), which they ended up naming the in-universe safe company after. Always fantastic work when the two of them are involved. Some amazing character moments again here.

We get to see some of Eliot's backstory with Aimee which in turn gives us two fantastic moments with him and the women of the team. I love his interaction with Sophie at the racetrack: "I like Aimee, I do. I mean it, I like you both, Eliot. I just, I don't know what comes of chasing the past, you know." -- "Well Sophie, sweetie, I don't think you and Nate get to serve me that particular meal." Just fantastic moment between these two, who I like to call The Conference of Mom Friends whenever they are in scenes together. The other interaction is with Parker in the car: "We need you to do this. I need you to do this." I adore Eliot and Parker's relationship and this already is a very early glimpse at the dynamic they develop which will eventually lead to beautiful moments like that in the ice cave in The Long Way Down Job in season four.

I also love how it is Hardison and Parker's discussion about horses that ultimately reminds Nate of the Lost Heir con. Aldis' delivery of "Wilbur loved Mr Ed! He loved him like a second cousin twice removed" is absolutely brilliant. Unsurprisingly, however, my favourite interaction of this episode is the one Eliot has with Aimee at the end: "You're never gonna be the kind to settle down, but I'm glad you found a family." -- "Th-those guys?" Yes, Eliot, those guys. You might not know it just yet, but that is absolutely your family, and the fact that an outsider already comments on it this early is simply perfect. My deepest gratitude to you, wonder twins.

107: THE BANK SHOT JOB

D: DEAN DEVLIN. W: AMY BERG. Original Air Date: 30 December 2008.

Amy Berg on the typewriter once again (typewriter? Alex what are you talking about this was 2008...)! I really like this episode a whole lot. An excellent one for Nate/Sophie, as well as Hardison/Parker. I have a huge soft spot for my crime children pretending to be law enforcement. Any combination of them is good, but Parker and Hardison as FBI agents especially is just exquisite.

This episode is also just fantastic for illustrating some of the small town criminal activity that happens from the top down. Judge Roy's entire bit about how "these little people" will do and say whatever he tells them to do and that, because he is the law in the town, he gets to decide what is actually true and what is not. To then have Hardison fake security footage and them turning the story against Judge Roy is of course poetic justice. I adore the moment when the bank manager Frank decides that sticking with the false facts these random people have come up with is the better choice than having the judge remain in charge.

I also really love the interaction Derrick has with Sophie and then later with Parker, as well as the moment of uncertainty in-between. His "I don't know what to do with that" when Sophie tells him she's a thief is so funny and so good. The turn of "but they're criminals....then again" when he looks out of the window on the way to Parker is also just a nice moment to illustrate exactly what Parker then later says, "sometimes bad guys are the only good guys you get." Ethics and justice are such muddy concepts and especially in situations like Derrick is currently in, there is no way of knowing who is actually good, who is bad, and who is just trying their best. It is a lovely moment and once again, one of those great instances of "important message within character moment" that this show does so well.

Of course, I am also very fond of Hardison's mention of DOCTOR WHO, his "Geek power baby, stay strong" line, Eliot's fight scene with the crack dealers ("stay in the car!"), Hardison's bullshitting the demands at the bank (Hall & Oates!) and, of course, last but not least, the return of my favourite FBI fools, McSweetheart and Taggert, getting yet another win laid in their lap by the Leverage crew. This episode is filled to the brim with greatness.

108: THE MIRACLE JOB

D: ARVIN BROWN. W: CHRISTINE BOYLAN. Original Air Date: 23 December 2008.

An absolutely excellent Nate-centric episode! We finally get a bit more of a view into Nate's past, aside from the ever-present flashback to Sam's death at the hospital. I really like the relationship of Nate and Father Paul, which I think is very interesting and so well done. Through Paul we get another side of Nate, which may have stayed hidden otherwise. I am also very fond of how Maggie is introduced here. She doesn't get a voice yet, but we learn about her through Nate, Sophie and also Paul, and I quite like that. It sets up expectations for her appearance in the finale, which is really intriguing.

This episode has so many great comedic beats as well, and I barely even know where to begin. From the team's inability to deal with Sophie's acting talents (or lack thereof) to the whole "It's not Santa" gag, the amazing faces Sophie pulls when the mark tells her about Bibletopia, Hardison's "God will smite us" thing -- there is just too much good stuff in this episode.

One of my favourite interactions in this episode was on the construction site, after Grant takes what he thinks are his meds.

Sophie: What is that you just took? Grant: Xanax. For my nerves. Parker: Actually caffeine. With a dash of dextroamphetamine. Eliot: You have him speed? Hardison, shrugging: He beat up a priest!

The look Eliot gives them then with a half-shrug, an expression which cannot be described as anything but "aight, fair enough" -- just absolutely excellent.

What I also really loved about this episode, is that we get to see more of the HQ than just the conference room. We have the team meeting in Nate's office, we see Sophie picking through her mail, Hardison making space so he can build fake Saint Nick statues. Added to that, the team is setting into such a nice familiarity with each other. Eliot brings Sophie a cup of coffee to the meeting in Nate's office. The fact that they all do get mail at the office. This is their space. I love it so much.

What this episode also gives us, is a first instance of the con possibly going side-ways because of how convincing it is. I adore that their possible downfall will never be incompetence, but rather over-competence. They are so good at what they do that sometimes their talent comes to bite them in the ass. We see this again, a bit different, in The Juror #6 Job.

The ending of this episode is very dear to me. It is a very lovely moment between Nate and Paul, but also Nate and the team. It creates such a beautiful moment of intimacy between these characters, which I think is done with extreme care, and it shows. This episode also very nicely sets up a nice sort of grounded-ness for the next episode, which I think the subject matter really deserves and needs.

109: THE STORK JOB

D: MARC ROSKIN. W: ALBERT KIM. Original Air Date: 06 January 2009.

This one and the next episode are excellent Parker-centric plots and this one in particular also has some wonderful Parker/Hardison content. Nate, also, is just very good in this episode as well. Keeping the tone the last episode established especially toward the end, this episode has such a nice grounded-ness to it. Nate's first meeting with the client is so careful in a way, and we don't always see that. Generally, Nate is careful and considerate in this episode, I think. Even when Parker goes rogue, he is so good with Parker (I attribute the brashness entirely to his director role here). It meant so much that he doesn't shoot down the idea of coming back for the other orphans, he knows how important this is to Parker (and Hardison).

With this episode we learn that both Parker and Hardison have grown up in the foster system. I really adore the conversation they have at the van after they find out about the orphanage -- Hardison telling Parker about his Nana, Parker's fear that foster system will be cruel to those children, Hardison's "I like how you turned out" -- it is such a lovely and meaningful moment. This and the "we're a team" / "a little more than a team" moments are such great instances that highlight the importance of these characters and their relationships in this show. It isn't just some crime procedural where every characters is replaceable at any given moment -- this show is about people, and about these specific people.

On a lighter note, I also really adore Nate and Sophie's dynamic in this. How they coach Parker and Eliot individually but at the same time, while also arguing about Sophie conning Nate back in the day, is just brilliant. Their "delightful banter" as Hardison calls it, is so good, and I absolutely love that Nate figures out the way to con Irina is the same way he would have to con Sophie. It's just too good.

David S. Lee as Nicholas is also incredibly good, although since watching THE LIBRARIANS I always expect him to swoon over a blonde and call her Duchess any minute.

110: THE JUROR #6 JOB

D: JONATHAN FRAKES. W: REBECCA KIRSCH. Original Air Date: 10 February 2009.

The lighter of the two Parker-centric episodes, but a brilliant one nonetheless. This episode also brings us the introduction of Peggy played by the lovely Lisa Schurga. We love Peggy in this house and, once again, I ask: where do I address my Peggy For Leverage: Redemption campaign to?

This episode is great for many different reasons, one of course being that Hardison is so good at what he does, that Parker's alias has to go to jury duty. What a talent, we absolutely have no choice but to stan. I love him so much. Other fantastic things that make this episode absolutely excellent are

- Nate's "there is not some evil conspiracy lurking behind the curtain of every routine civic activity" speech which he then has to retract,

- Sophie teaching Parker about persuasion with the help of Eliot who is absolutely precious in this interaction,

- Eliot's friend Donnie, who poses as another employee from the company Sophie pretends to be from, who then turns out to be Scottish,

- Nate and Sophie sending the kids off to work at the door, with a briefcase and handshake for Hardison and a snack and high-five for Parker,

and Hardison's entire act as a lawyer. He is so good. Of course his stalling is brilliant, but the turn-around once he has to actually try and win the trial? A masterpiece. I love how he tears the doctor apart for his drunken airplane misconducts, but what takes the cake by miles is of course his closing statement. He is just, so good, and such a goodhearted, wonderful person. I love how he directly addressed Parker. Hardison is full of sunshine and I love. him. so. much.

And I would be remiss not to mention how incredibly fond I am of the rest of the team watching the feed of the jury room from the HQ with such proud looks on their faces as Parker leads the other jury members and they vote in favour of the plaintiff. This is their girl and she's done so well. What a brilliant episode. My love to Becky Kirsch, honestly.

111: THE 12-STEP JOB

D: ROD HARDY. W: AMY BERG & CHRIS DOWNEY. Original Air Date: 03 February 2009.

Another episode, another instance of me asking the question: Where do I address my Hurley for Leverage: Redemption campaign to? We love Hurley! Drew Powell is absolutely fantastic, I adore him. Also huge shoutout to Joseph LoDuca for that absolute banger of a song that plays during the intro and the credits.

This episode has some fantastic Eliot/Hardison moments that are very dear to me. The two of them looking for Hurley and fighting over Hardison's slushy spill is just lovely. The whole car bomb sequence is also just completely brilliant. It's such a step in their relationship and I love it so much. The moment of "D'you want me to kick it?" / "God, I'm gon' die" is a wonderful comedic beat in this tense situation, but it is the bit after that I really adore. Hardison figuring out how to trick the bomb and then,

Eliot: What's our margin of error here? Hardison: 'bout half a second. Eliot: Run the ba-bag of bricks by me again? Hardison: Are you ready? Eliot: No.

I am just, so fond of these two. Also the fact that Eliot's hand shakes when he reaches for the cables and waits for Hardison's signal always puts me all up in my feelings about him. I also of course adore the scene at the rehab facility with Hardison's "I'm with him. No, I am with him. See, he thinks the flirting makes me jealous, but it doesn't. But if you was like Brad Pitt or Denzel or somebody, oh girl it would be on." It love it so much.

Nate, of course, is also just great in this episode. His entire experience in rehab is another wonderful insight into his character, his issues, how he sees himself and so on. The hallucination of Sterling says so much about him. I think this also very nicely sets up how Nate behaves in the finale double episode.

I also really want to mention Parker here, because Parker in rehab is also something I am very fond of. I love the moment where she pickpockets the Koreans searching for Hurley and then so innocently comes to Nate to confess what she's done and tells him in this tiny voice "I didn't meant to, it was just instinct." I love her so much. And her, at the end of the episode, skipping along and then running toward her people, jumping on Eliot while tossing her stuff at Nate, and then going to hug Hardison, is such a lovely moment. I love how the three of them then walk toward the car arm in arm, too. I love these kids.

112: THE FIRST DAVID JOB

D: DEAN DEVLIN. W: JOHN ROGERS. Original Air Date: 17 February 2009.

First half of the first finale! I gotta say I really love the David Jobs very much. It is such a fantastic first finale. I really adore how the opening of this episode is mirrored in the opening of the second half.

Given the set-up of the previous episode, I really like how for a first time watcher, this opening sequence very much looks like Nate is completely off the rails doing his own thing getting revenge on the man who, basically, killed his son. It isn't until Blackpoole introduces Nate to 'Portia' and we see Sophie turn around that it becomes clear that we're on the con, which I think is done very nicely. Only then giving the viewer the "how we got here" part is just great.

This episode of course also brings us, finally, Maggie (yes, I'll ask again: where do I address my Maggie For Leverage: Redemption campaign to?). I absolutely love how she is introduced here as Eliot's date. I also love how absolutely terrified Eliot looks once he realises that she isn't just anyone, but Nate's ex-wife. Maggie is such an excellent character, and I adore her. I also am very appreciative that this episode holds the singular moment of jealousy Sophie has toward Maggie. After her momentary outburst as Maggie tells Nate she hasn't stopped caring about him, we never see it again. Even better, once Maggie learns about Nate's crew, Sophie and her even become friends. And it is lovely.

We also have some great Parker/Hardison moments in this episode as well. I adore Parker and her enthusiasm for their "little naked man" and Hardison being weirded out about it (and turning the little David around so Parker can change in private). I, of course, absolutely love the kiss (and Eliot's grinning question at Sophie who of the two of them Parker had kissed) and then the theft of the First David. Hardison is so in awe of Parker and it is a sight to behold.

I also quite enjoy the "downfall" in this episode. Sterling showing up (we love the bastard), the fight between Eliot and Mr Quinn, the conversation about Sophie conning them on the roof, and then of course the final confrontations on that same roof as well as the HQ. This whole thing of "and then I asked myself, what would Parker do?" / "but then I thought, what would Hardison do?" is just brilliant and lovely. It shows how far they have all come throughout this first season and how much they have learned from each other already. I am very fond of it.

I am sad about the offices being blown up, though. As much as I love both McRory's pub and Nate's apartment in Boston, as well as the Brewpub in Portland, I've always really liked the LA offices as well. It was their first home and it was lovely. I am however very happy that Old Nate made it out unscathed.

113: THE SECOND DAVID JOB

D: DEAN DEVLIN. W: JOHN ROGERS & CHRIS DOWNEY. Original Air Date: 24 February 2009.

And the last episode! As I've said above, I adore how this opening sequence mirrors that of The First David Job. Similarly, I also love how until Sophie notices Parker's laser pointer and Eliot sees Hardison, as a viewer you assume they are on the job together, which is again the reversal of the first half of the finale. Just lovely storytelling, I adore it. Speaking of mirrors, the scene in the MC Hammer mansion where Nate inconspicuously manages to get them all thinking about the con together and putting their differences aside once more, also mirrors one of my favourite scenes from the first episode of season two, where the team does the same to Nate.

This episode on the whole I also just marvellous. Eliot's awkward date with Maggie, Nate finally telling Maggie about Blackpoole's involvement (or lack thereof) in Sam's death, the team involving Maggie in the planning of the con and her, precious as she is, questioning Nate's ability to just get people to do what he wants -- it is all just so good. I love Maggie on the con, too. Sophie coaching her, how good Maggie is at it immediately. Just lovely.

Then, of course, the entirety of the con from the moment Nate shows up at the museum. Sterling hurrying all over the place trying to figure out what Nate's plan is, finding out about the mummy, the release of the gas, the evacuation, the David statue replicas, them finally getting in and finding Nate alone in the exhibit room. I adore that shot of him leaning against the display case with the two Davids still inside, only highlighted from the open hatch in the roof. It is such a beautiful shot. I really enjoy Nate and Sterling's dynamic here, too. And I am very happy that Maggie gets to punch Blackpoole just like Nate got to in the episode before. They both deserve to give this man hell.

The ending of this episode and therefore this season always has me in all of my emotions. If I didn't know there would be more after this, I would just go lie down and weep for a while after watching it. The trademark overhead walkaway shot is of course a must, but the fact that they stop, that all of them hesitate, thinking about turning around, thinking about changing their minds. And then it cuts to black, and if this had been it, we would've never known! Ah, what a show, what a first season. I am completely in love with this show, as pretty much everyone knows, but I just -- this show is so damn good. It gets me every single time. Every time.

[image taken from the electricnow website]

[captain-josslett]

Broken Melody - Part One

Part One, Part Two, Part Three, Part Four, Part Five, Part Six, Part Seven, Part Eight, Part Nine, Part Ten, Part Eleven,

Summary: Grammy Award winning Emma Danvers is the first to say she has a pretty good life. But what happens when it implodes around her and it looks like things will never be the same again?

Words: 10k+

Warnings: None... yet...

Pairings: Emma Danvers x Lena Luthor (Eventual)

Right! I wrote the beginning of this fic months ago. It’s going to get angsty so be ready. But the purpose of the first part is to introduce this version of B!D, a well known singer in a grammy award winning band. I honestly had a great time writing this first part!

Thank you for reading and let me know if you wanna be tagged or any general feedback will be greatly appreciated.

For @thewitchandtheassassin​, @natasha-danvers​, @life-is-hella-unfair​, @finleyfray​, @supergirl-writingz​,

The screeching of Emma Danver’s alarm makes her hazel green eyes shoot open. Normally on a Saturday she wouldn’t have her alarm set and would laze in bed. Especially when she is home from her latest world tour. However, today was going to be a day filled with the Superfriends, and she can’t wait!

Emma had mentioned at the latest game night that she wanted to check out a beach over an hour away from the city and how they could make a day of it. Kara, her Supergirl sister, instantly accepted the idea while bouncing up and down with excitement. Mostly everyone else agreed, happy to know the summer sun would be in full force that day.

Well they still had to persuade a few people, mainly Lena and Alex. But when Emma and Kara both knelt in front of the women with their identical Danvers pouts they were forcibly won over.

Emma smiles as she stretches and runs her hands through her wavy blonde hair. She quickly gets out of bed and opens her curtains. Sighing happily and just enjoying the sunshine blazing into her penthouse bedroom. Emma can totally see how Kara gets her Supergirl powers from the sun, how it recharges her and makes her the Woman of Steel.

After a few more minutes Emma turns and grabs her phone. While making her way to her ensuite she messages the group chat.

Emma: Gooooooodd Mmmoooorrrrnnnniiiinnnngggg!!! How’s everyone? Seriously can’t wait for today!

After having a quick shower Emma wanders back into her room and decides what to wear. She puts on her turquoise surf bikini with her tight black surfing shorts. She wears her blue jean shorts over the top, and a white tank top. She finishes her outfit off with her many bracelets, her apple watch and a layered necklace that has a star, sun and swan pendant. Symbolising each of the Danvers sisters. Alex is the star, Kara is the sun and Emma is the swan.

Swan became one of Emma’s nicknames in school due to there being a lot of Emma’s in the class. Her friends joked she was a swan princess due to doing ballet when she had asked them to come to a recital. Which they did and were in awe, but you know. Emma happily accepted the nickname, taking it as a compliment. Emma smiles as she looks at her ballet shoes strung over her mirror. ‘Another thing I need to get back into.’ Emma thinks wistfully. She still loves dancing, especially the latin styles like samba and tango. But she doesn’t have the time.

As she draws her attention to her reflection she definitely looks like a surfer chick, lean, toned and sun kissed. Which she was happily going for. She’s been dying to surf for ages but just hasn’t had the time. Her band had recently returned from a sell out world tour. And sadly most of the places they played at didn’t have beaches or the right surf. She felt sorry for her neglected surfboard in the back of the tour bus.

Her phone pings drawing her attention away from her musings. Emma laughs when she sees a few messages have already been sent.

Kara: Good morning sunshine! I’m sssoooooo excited too! Did you need me to bring anything else? I got all the food ready!

Kelly: Of course you’d have the food Kara!

Kelly: And good morning Emma! Shall I bring my swimsuit? Anyone going for a swim?

Kara: Ooo I am! And I think Emma is going to surf?

James: Why are you guys texting this early? I could have had at least another hour or more of sleep.

Alex: I agree with James… Emma, I hate you.

Emma chuckles at Alex’s message while she gets a bag ready with a change of clothes.

Emma: Love you too Alex!

Kara: Ahem… What about me?!

Emma: Love you too Kara!

Alex: You love me more though right?

Emma: No I love you both the same!

Kara: *Wink Wink*

Alex: Hey!

Nia: What am I just decoration?

Emma: No of course not Nia! I love you too!

James: What about me?

Kelly: And me!

Emma: Yes James and Kelly I love you both too.

Lena: Do you love me?

Emma pauses before she responds to Lena’s text. Honestly, she’s had a crush on her since the moment they met. But Lena is way out of Emma’s league. A CEO dating a musician and artist like Emma wouldn’t work. She’s not clever or brave like Kara or Alex.

Once when Lena had met her for lunch, Lena had explained what being a CEO entailed. Emma’s mind melted; it was so complex. Lena just laughed at her exasperated expression trying to figure it all out. “And that, my darling, is why you are an artist and I am a CEO.” Emma practically melted at Lena’s smile from across the table.

But that’s one of the things she loves about Lena, her passion for her work and drive for making the world a better place. And her smile. To Emma, Lena’s smile lights up the whole room.

Sighing Emma looks back down at her phone.

Emma: I love you the most… *Delete*

Emma: Yea I love you too. :)

‘Somewhat truthful…’ Emma thinks as she puts her phone in her pocket, grabbings her backpack, guitar case and placing it by the door. Kneeling on her sofa she pulls her surfboard up from behind, giving it a quick hug. Excitement surges through her veins at the thought of surfing the waves.

‘Rao I hope the waves are good today!’ Emma wishes as she swings the board around and accidentally knocks her recent Grammy on the floor. “Shoot!” Emma yelps and quickly drops her surfboard to pick up the award. Emma sighs in relief when she turns it over in her hands, seeing it wasn’t broken. Out of all her awards, this year's Grammy meant the most to her. The album had been a real breakthrough moment for her and the band, Axis, and they swept away the competition. Emma remembers the feeling of pride and honour when their name was called. How she and the rest of the band rushed to the stage in unison and linked arms as each said a thank you.

Emma carefully places the Grammy down and picks up her surfboard. Grabbing the rest of her stuff she locks the door behind her and takes the elevator down to her beloved yellow VW beetle. Which she affectionately calls the ‘bug’. Emma puts her stuff in the car and carefully straps the board onto the roof rack before getting into the driver's seat.

Taking her phone out she sends Lena and Kara a quick message to say she’s on her way to pick them up. Alex and Kelly are picking up Sam. Who did try and persuade Ruby to come but now as a teenager, Ruby has better things to do then hang out with her Mom and her Mom’s friends. James is giving J'onn, Nia and Brainy a ride.

Emma quickly plugs in her phone and chooses to blare out her playlist of her favourite songs. As she pulls out of the underground parking garage she starts singing and making dramatic hand movements as she dances along. Not caring if people see her.

Soon she’s outside Lena’s apartment building and as she turns the music down Lena Luthor herself was exiting the building. Emma’s mouth drops open with how beautiful Lena looks. And how different she looks too! Gone were the suits and smart wear of a CEO. Instead Lena was wearing a thigh length red patterned skirt that matched her red lips with a black crop top. To finish the look off she wore a black bowler hat.

When Lena opens the passenger door Emma quickly closes her mouth.

“Hi Em!” Lena smiles brightly at the blonde and leans over to place a kiss on Emma’s cheek. Making the blonde blush and causing her brain short circuits.

“Hi Lee!” Emma says more high pitched than normal.

Lena grins at her in amusement. ‘Rao I could get lost in those green eyes.’

“Er, Em… We gonna go?” Lena teases causing Emma to jump and pull away from the pavement. “So, how has your week been?”

“Fine. Got a commission to complete before Thursday but I’m almost done. I actually have to thank you, it's the lovely couple we met at the recent gala we went to.”

Whenever Emma is back in the city Lena always invites her to the gala’s. Surprisingly Emma finds she enjoys them, especially when it's one of Lena’s charity events. Lena and Emma are both thrilled to find Emma has a talent in being able to persuade the rich attendees to donate their money. Even from those who have never donated before. “It’s the Danvers charms!” Emma would laugh and wink at Lena when the raven haired women would be dumbfounded at the cheque in her hand from a rival.

“Mr and Mrs Green?” Lena asks, remembering how the couple were enthralled with Emma’s work as an artist and musician. Their donation had been one of the biggest of that night. ‘No surprise there.’ Lena smirks.

“Yea them.” Emma nods while concentrating on driving. She does love the city life but driving through it can be such a pain.

“What did they ask for?” Lena inquires while picking at a loose thread in her skirt.

“Mainly a seascape of a view they had back in the UK. Thatchers rock… I think.” To be honest Emma had been surprised by the Green’s enthusiasm when she showed them her portfolio. How they were willing to wait for Emma’s tour to finish before getting their commission. It had been made easier that there was a reference to work on. Even though she has never been to that part of the UK. Mainly the cities dotting around the island. And even though Emma doesn’t need the money she enjoys doing something different. Her art gives her another escape.

“What style are you doing it in?” Lena asks as she bobs her head along with Emma to the music. Something she’s never done before until getting rides with Emma. Something about the blonde’s carefree attitude rubbing off on her.

“I’m using oil this time. I think it works better with the layering and it can really make the sea look like it’s moving you know? Well… If I get it right.” Emma realises she started to ramble and quickly cuts herself off. Certain Lena wouldn’t want to hear the techniques Emma has been using. “If all goes to plan the painting should look different with the different lighting of the day.”

“I am sure you will darling.” Lena smiles widely at her.

Emma smiles back. Feeling butterflies zoom round her stomach at the term of endearment.

“Thanks Lee.” Emma taps her thumbs to the beat while they wait for a light to turn green.

“How-”

“How’d-”

They both stop when they realise they both started talking.

“You go.” Emma motions Lena to continue.

“How’s everything going with the band?”

“It’s going really, really well! We are already writing songs for the next album. But we’ve also really benefited having this time off too.” Emma grins thinking of the other band members. 

In some ways they’ve become another little family to her. The four other guys were already formed and were looking for a female influence. Emma saw the flyer and thought ‘why not!’ before calling them and doing an audition. The guys were blown away by her voice and talent. Unanimously they agreed she can become a member of the band and ultimately making her the lead singer. That was over eight years ago when Emma was eighteen and Axis were well known in certain areas of America but when Emma joined their popularity skyrocketed. 

However fame didn’t matter to Emma, but she loves performing and writing music. Especially when she gets fan messages about how her songs have helped someone get through a difficult time and gave them hope. She always makes sure to save those messages.

“Sounds exciting.” Lena agrees, nodding her head.

“Speaking of deals.” Emma pauses to concentrate on the traffic. “How’d the deal with the Japanese go?”

Even though Emma wasn’t looking at Lena she could feel the big eye roll the raven haired beauty did.

“That good huh?” Emma jokes but feels for the CEO.

“Honestly it was a nightmare. They kept going around in circles and I’m just getting over the migraine!” Lena dramatically rubs her forehead. Which Emma misses from looking at the road.

“Ah no.” Emma frowns as she quickly looks at Lena. “Are you sure you’re okay to come to the beach?”

“Yes I’m fine.” Lena smirks at Emma’s concern.

“Okay, I am glad you’re coming.” Emma smiles brightly back.

Lena raises an eyebrow. “Did I have a choice?” Lena teases.

“Yes! But it would have made me very sad if you hadn’t.” Emma pouts dramatically and pulls off her best puppy dog eyes.

“And that’s why I said yes.” Lena chuckles at how adorable Emma looks.

Soon they pull up to Kara’s building and she’s already waiting outside. Piles of bags by her feet. Both Lena and Emma laugh at the sight. “Joys of being Supergirl I guess!” Emma jokes about Kara’s metabolism.

As she parks Emma can’t help but remember the day Kara became a part of the Danvers family.

Emma had taken to the alien quicker then Alex, especially as there was only a year age difference between the two blondes. She also found she became the bridge between Alex and Kara. Over time the three learned how to live with the new dynamic and would soon enjoy each other's company. Kara and Alex would laugh when little Emma would cheerfully yell that they were the three musketeers as they played with wooden swords or practically any activity that involved the three of them. Even making hot chocolate together.

When Kara became Supergirl Emma almost had a fit. She’d been in New York for a sold out week of gigs when she had seen the news in the early hours of the morning. Frantically she called Kara to see if she was okay and getting even more frantic when she realised Alex had been on the plane too. The two sisters were eventually able to calm her down after a lot of sobbing and panic from her end. When Emma returned to National City she held onto her sisters a lot tighter that day. Eventually the three ended up falling asleep together on the sofa. Emma in the middle of the two as they wrapped their arms around each other.

Emma’s musings were interrupted when Kara slammed the car boot down hard. Causing the car to bounce.

“Careful Kara!” Emma yells, knowing full well her sister would hear her.

“Sorry little one! I’m just so excited!” Kara squeals as she opens the backseat door before leaping in.

“Hey I’m only a year younger than you!” Emma frowns into the rear view mirror to glare at her sister. Who just sticks her tongue back at her while clicking in her seat belt.

They continue the hour long drive to the beach, chatting and singing along to Emma’s playlist. Lena watches on in amazement as Kara sings the melody and Emma does some beautiful harmonies around her. They all laugh and cheer when Queen’s ‘Bohemian Rhapsody’ comes on.

“Come on Lena! Join in!” Emma yells while she puts the volume right up. So Lena does. When the rock part of the song comes on all three of them dance and headbang along. Lena laughs as she feels so carefree. She pauses when Emma starts singing passionately to the next verse.

So you think you can stop me and spit in my eye So you think you can love me and leave me to die Oh, baby, can’t do this to me, baby Just gotta get out, just gotta get right outta here

Honestly she could listen to Emma’s voice for hours. Which is probably why she secretly went to as many of Emma’s gigs as possible. But every time she would go to reveal herself to Emma she would back peddle and leave. Knowing that someone as talented as Emma was way out of her league. Her pride for her friend as she watched with the Superfriends at Kara’s apartment as Axis won Grammy after Grammy, award after award. How they screamed with joy and hugged each other after each announcement. Plus Lena thought someone as pure and happy as Emma wouldn’t do well with someone broken like Lena. So she keeps her feelings to herself and tries to be content with being Emma’s friend.

Lena’s heart warms as she remembers meeting Emma for the first time over 3 years ago. She had been at one of her first game nights with the Superfriends when a knock sounded on Kara’s door. Everyone had looked at each other in surprise as no one was missing. Lena watched Kara bounce towards the door and as she opened it a continuous scream of surprise and happiness escaped Kara’s mouth. This caused Alex to rush over in response and suddenly scream as well. The two sisters practically tackled the blonde beauty out into the hallway where they fell into a laughing heap. Kara kissed the blonde’s head over and over while Alex held onto her like a koala bear and kissed her cheek over and over.

Finally they untangled and Kara dragged the other blonde into her apartment. Excitedly introducing everyone to her little sister, Emma. The Superfriends each individually greeted the newcomer and when it came to Lena’s turn Emma had stepped forward and gave her an affectionate hug. Laughing that Kara has told Emma so much about her that she feels she already knows Lena well. When Emma stepped away from the hug they both ignored the warm feelings racing around their bodies. Lena had to agree as both the Danvers sister’s spoke of Emma fondly and how proud they were of Emma’s success. Lena hadn’t told anyone this but she bought all of Emma's music to listen to it after Kara gushed about her sister. She instantly fell in love with the voice coming through the speakers.

Kara soon asked why Emma was in National City and Emma excitedly revealed that Axis was moving to National City. Lena again ignored the feeling of excitement that shot through her. And again Emma was tackled to the floor as both Alex and Kara leapt towards her in celebration.

“Lena?” Kara’s voice breaks through her thinking and Lena turns to look back at her best friend. Listening intently as Kara excitedly explains a new prototype Brainy is designing to help Kara not be so affected by Kryptonite.

“Maybe I can help with it?” Lena offers kindly.

Kara’s smile brightens up even more. “That would be swell!”

Lena gives Kara a small smile before turning back to the front. To be honest it still stings that Kara didn’t tell her Supergirl secret to the CEO. It had been two years after Emma had moved back to National City when Lena and Kara were having lunch but Kara was being called away. Again. Lena couldn’t stop herself and blurted out she knew Kara’s secret. She will never forget how Kara’s face fell and the promise of talking about it after she’s finished. Lena’s face grew cold as her walls shot up. She told Kara not to bother and stormed out of the restaurant to her penthouse apartment. She refused to see anyone or answer her phone. Allowing her past hurts and hatred to simmer and boil.

That was until a knock sounded on her door. She chose to ignore it but the knocking persisted.

“Come on Lena, please open the door. Let’s talk about this.” Emma’s muffled voice sounded through the door.

“Why should I?” Lena spits out as she draws closer, crossing her arms tightly over her chest.

“Because you shouldn’t be alone right now.”

Lena scoffs. “And why not?”

“Because you’ll allow your demons to lie to you and it will eat you up.” Emma had experience with this herself.

Tears fill Lena’s eyes and against the screaming in her head she reaches out and opens the door.

“Hey you.” Emma gives Lena a small smile before stepping into the apartment. Placing the takeout bags on the floor and pulling Lena into a tight hug. Allowing Lena to break down as she sobs into Emma’s shoulder. All her past hurts rushing forward and spewing out.

After she was spent Emma gently led her to the sofa and reheated the food. Making sure Lena ate. They talked long into the night and when Lena started rubbing her eyes from exhaustion Emma helped her get ready for bed. As Lena slid between the sheets Emma leaned down to give her a goodnight hug. But stopped when Lena wouldn't let her go. “Stay.” Lena whispered. So Emma grabbed a pair of her spare clothes she left for times like this and got in next to her. Lena shifted over to her and rested her head on Emma’s shoulder. Emma wrapped her arms around Lena and held her close. They don’t say anything more but drift into a peaceful sleep.

“We’re here!” Emma sings out, causing Lena to jump slightly. They pull into a car park right next to the beach.

“Oh wow!! Look at the sea! It’s so beautiful!” Kara gasps as she presses herself against the window and like an excited child she unbuckles and races towards the beach. Having already spotted Alex, Kelly and Sam setting up.

Emma snorts at her sister’s behaviour while she unbuckles her seatbelt.

“Er… She will help us with the food? Right?” Lena looks back at the overflow of food bags in the back of the bug.

“Yea as soon as she realises she will shoot back up here.” Emma chuckles while getting out of the car. And Kara did just that as Emma went to pay for a parking ticket she watched Kara race back up to them, in human speed. “Glad to see you helping.” Emma raises an eyebrow at her sister as Kara reaches the bug.

“Sorry! I just got really excited! It’s so beautiful here!” Kara bounces like a puppy.

“Now you understand why I dragged you here instead of going to the beach at NC?” Emma says while carefully unstrapping her board before lowering it and leaning it up against the bug.

“Yes, yes.” Kara keeps her eyes on the beach.

“Hey.” Emma smirks at her distracted sister.

“Yea?” Kara tears her eyes away to look at Emma. Smiling when Emma opens are arms and they hug. “Haven’t been able to give you one yet.” Emma says in her ear. Kara buries her face into Emma’s neck, enjoying the warmth and feeling of home whenever she hugs her sisters.

The car door closing makes them break apart. “Okay I think that’s everything.” Lena says while looking at the small mountain of bags.

“Thanks Lena!” Kara sings as she grabs half of the bags before Emma can tell her to only take a few. Hopefully no one will question how a slim woman can carry that much weight. Lena catches Emma’s eye and they both roll their eyes at each other.

“Jink!” Emma yells causing Lena to do another eye roll. Before Emma can reach down for her stuff Lena steps forward.

“Can I have a hug too?”

“Sure you can Lee.” Emma opens her arms wide and Lena almost tackles her with her enthusiasm. They both sigh happily as they hold onto each other a bit longer than necessary. Emma breaks the hug and steps back, grabbing her backpack, placing a few food bags on her shoulders picking up her guitar, and securing her surfboard under her arm. “Oh Lee don’t take that many, Kara will come up and get the last few.”

“Okay.” Lena nods while swinging a food bag on each of her shoulders and they start walking towards the beach. “Kara is right though, it’s really beautiful here.”

Emma smiles at her, happy Lena approves. The sand was a beautiful white which made the sea clear and looked like a gorgeous turquoise and teal. The richness of the colours makes Emma want to weep with happiness. They could pretend like they were in the Caribbean or on the Hawaiian islands.

“Hey Peanut!” Alex yells as Emma approaches her.

Peanut has always been Alex’s nickname for Emma since their parents told three year old Alex she was going to be a big sister. Alex had been fascinated about it all and when her Mom had told her the baby was the size of a peanut the name stuck. Even when Emma grew and was the size of tennis ball Alex would still refer to the baby as Peanut.

“Hey sis!” Emma yells back, dumping her stuff on one of the picnic blankets. Alex comes over and pulls Emma into a tight hug, quickly followed by Kelly and Sam. “Been a long time Sam, how are you?”

“I know I’m sorry!” Sam says as she takes a step back. “Life’s been hectic!”

“Oh don’t I know it.” Emma laughs. “Maybe you can ask your boss to allow you to have a life?” Emma teases while giving Lena a pointed look.

“Not my problem she wants to work longer hours then she is contracted!” Lena places her hands on her hips.

“Maybe she’s following her boss's example? And maybe the boss needs to cut down too? Maybe relax a bit?” Emma stalks towards her crush.

“Maybe-” Lena stops what she was going to say and tilts her head as she watches Emma approach. A smirk on her face. “What are you doing?”

Suddenly Emma reaches out and starts tickling Lena who laughs loudly and tries to swat the blonde away.

“Lena! She’s ticklish too!” Alex snickers as she goes through the food bags.

“Traitor!” Emma yells as Lena starts her own assault. The two women fall to the sand in fits of giggles as they wrestle. Before Emma can gain the upper hand Lena straddles her and continues tickling her. “No! Lena!” Emma kicks out trying to shift the woman on top of her. But Lena was not budging. “Argh! I surrender! Please!” Emma wheezes.

“I win?" Lena stops and gazes down at Emma triumphantly.

“You win.” Emma coughs and when Lena moves off her she instantly misses the feeling of Lena’s weight on top of her.

“Are you ladies done or are you going to help?” Alex raises her eyebrow at them as they catch their breath.

“Yes ma'am.” Emma salutes before getting up, rubbing the sand off herself and reaching out to help Lena up. They smirk at each other and set to work getting the rest of the blankets and chairs out for the Superfriends.

Soon the other group arrives and they all sit chatting and relaxing. The men start setting the BBQ up, insisting they can do it, much to the amusement of the women as they try to do it without looking at the instructions.

Alex, Kara and Emma smile at each other as they share a look before giggling. The Danvers sisters have barbecuing in the great outdoors down to an art. But if it keeps the men happy they stay quiet. Sighing Emma turns away from the entertainment and looks out to sea, watching the waves and the surfers riding them.

Alex shuffles up to her, resting her head on Emma’s shoulder. “You can go if you want.”

Emma rests the side of her head on her sister’s. “I know, but the waves aren’t quite right yet.”

“Okay.” Alex wraps her arms around Emma, who returns the gesture and holds onto Alex. Emma moves her head and kisses Alex’s head before resting her own on Alex’s again.

Alex smiles and kisses Emma’s hand that's holding her close. At first Alex wasn’t too keen on the idea of coming to the beach, too much work to do at the DEO and an hour travelling seems like an eternity. But Alex is glad she came. They sit content.

“How can you tell if the waves are not right?” Brainy asks, having left J'onn and James to sort out the BBQ.

Emma looks up at him. “I don’t know, you just can. It’s a feeling.” Emma runs a hand through her hair trying to think of a better way to explain it. “Like when you are out there you know a big wave is coming, the wave. You just got to be patient and take the moment when it comes.”

Brainy tilts his head at her. “I think I understand.”

“Well I’m glad you did.” Alex snorts and yelps when Emma playfully slaps her bare arm.

“Oh come on I didn’t slap you that hard!” Emma laughs but rubs her sister’s arm.

“Anyone wanna play rounders?” Lena asks the group as she picks up one of her bags. She pulls out a rounders bat, which is shorter than a baseball bat, and ball.

“Rounders?” Kara asks, confused. “Don’t you mean baseball?”

“No, I mean rounders, it’s what we played at my boarding school. It’s the game that baseball came from. The first known account of it was in 1744 with the Tudors.” Half of the group look at Lena blankly, while the other half look interested and know who the Tudors are. “Basically you still have four bases, home runs etc. The bowler must do underarm, though we can do overarm…” Lena pauses. “It’s just different okay?”

“Sounds good to me!” Sam leaps to her feet and starts setting the four bases up. Everyone else follows suit and splits into teams, Lena and Sam being the captains of each team. On Lena’s team is Kara, James, Alex and Emma versus Sam’s team which has Kelly, J'onn, Brainy and Nia.

After a coin toss Lena’s team bats first with Sam being the bowler, or pitcher, as Alex yells out.

“And can we make a rule of no powers? We don’t want the ball getting batted into space!” Sam jokes as she jogs to bowler base.

“Sounds fair.” Kara says looking at J'onn who nods in agreement. She gets into position to bat. She hits the ball no problem and starts to run, but she hits the ball too high and Brainy is already waiting to catch it.

“Out!” Sam yells as Brainy holds the ball in his hand, causing Kara to skid to a halt. She turns and walks back to the team, kicking the sand as she goes.

“Hard luck sis.” Alex rubs Kara’s back when she comes back to the line up. Pouting all the way. Emma gives her a hug and kisses her cheek.

“You’ll do it next time.” Emma reassures her.

They watch James get into position and hit quite a good ball. He manages to get to third base before having to stop when Nia catches the ball while on 4th base.

Lena is the next to go and Emma can’t help but watch as she sways her hips getting ready to strike. Her ball goes low and far. She sprints off and her team screams and cheers when she manages to do a home run.

“Nicely done Lee!” Emma holds her hand out to high five the out of breath CEO.

“Thanks.” Lena smiles brightly at the blonde while holding onto her hand longer than necessary.

Alex is up next, feeling the pressure of going after Lena’s home run.

“You got this babe!” Kelly smiles from the 2nd base. Alex smiles back at her before readying herself. She misses the first ball.

“Strike 1!”

Huffing Alex gets back into position again. And misses.

“Strike two!”

“You got this Al!” Emma claps and encourages her sister.

Taking a deep breath Alex readies herself and watches the ball. She manages to hit it and sprints to 2nd base.

“Nice to see you Alex!” Kelly teases the red head causing Alex to gently shove her girlfriend.

“Right you’re up Emma!” Sam calls as she catches the ball.

Emma picks the bat up, wiping the sand off it and stands in position. Noticing the opponents are standing mainly to the left, Emma decides to trick them. When Sam throws the ball she quickly turns her body and whacks the ball to the right side of the field far away from the group. She runs half the way and seeing Brainy is still running to the ball she walks the rest of the way, dancing and blowing kisses. She starts sprinting the last few feet as the ball is being thrown towards Nia. The team celebrates her home run and they play a few more rounds, having a few collisions and lots of laughter. They have two more goes each and swap over. Lena takes over as the bowler. “Pitcher!” Alex yells as she runs to man 2nd base.

The new batting team does just as well and Sam’s team are one point behind. J’onn is up as the last batter, it’s all on him. If he gets a home run Sam’s team has won the game. Emma watches the ball carefully as Lena throws it and in a split second it's coming right at her. She reaches out her hand and catches it. Everyone stares dumbfoundead before yelling in surprise and either excitement from winning or groans for losing.

Emma’s team crowd her and she laughs at the attention.

“Emma?” A voice says behind her.

Emma’s head shoots round and she smiles when she sees her bandmates standing there.

“Guys?” She rushes towards them. Emma had told them of her plans and had invited them to join. They had said they were busy so it's a huge surprise to Emma that they stood in front of her. “What are you doing here?”

“We are… Wanted to talk to you.” Jack, the guitarist and other singer, says before he looks at the Superfriends behind Emma, watching them intently. “Alone.”

“Sure.” Emma shrugs, she turns back to Lena and throws her the ball. Emma walks with her bandmates along the beach until they are far enough away. Though Emma is sure Kara can still hear them. “So, whats up? Everything okay?”

“Er… So about that-” Danny, the drummer, starts but rubs his neck. Feeling very awkward. Frankie, the keyboardist, doesn’t make eye contact with Emma and shuffles his feet in the sand.

Mick interrupts. “We want to leave the band.”

Emma’s mind screeches to a halt. “Leave? All of you?”

“Yea Em. Just with Jack getting engaged, Frankie’s Dad being ill and Danny’s baby is due. We just don’t have the same drive like you do.” Mick looks sadly at her. “We are a great team, but it’s just not the same. After moving to National City we realised we want to settle, have families, the whole white picket fence thing.”

Emma places her hands on her hips, biting her lips to stop the tears threatening to fall. “What about the new album? We’ve already written most of the songs.”

“You don’t need us Em. You are the front runner and can do this with anyone.” Jack tries to reassure her.

“But they won’t be you.” Emma’s heart starts to break when she looks at the finality in each of their eyes. “And… And nothing I can say will change your minds?”

Her four bandmates shake their heads.

“Okay.” Emma looks up at the sky, taking a deep breath before looking back at the men in front of her. “Well, can we do a farewell tour?”

“Sounds like a good plan.” Danny smiles sadly at her and the other three nod.

“Can we give you a hug?” Jack asks quietly, hating seeing Emma so defeated.

Emma nods and they go in for a long group hug. But as the tears start to spill Emma breaks the hug and rushes back to the Superfriends. Ignoring any questions, she throws off her clothes and jewellery and grabs her board. Sprinting to the surf and diving into the sea.

She paddles quickly, still hearing voices, most likely Kara and Alex, calling after her. But she drowns it out by duck diving under a wave as it rolls over her and she resurfaces. Emma continues further out past the swell where she can stop and just lie there. Letting the board bob as she gazes at the horizon. Emma allows her tears to fall. Her face distorts with her disappointment and hurt.

‘What am I going to do?’ Emma thinks. She gets why the guys want to leave. Knowing this would happen one day. Or at least a break, but it still hurts. ‘Since when did it change for them?’ Emma stays like this for a while, lost in her own thoughts.

Some time later splashing behind her makes her turn her head and she sits up. A wet laugh breaks through her lips when she sees Kara and Alex balancing on a paddle board trying to reach her. Alex particularly looks like how a cat would look in this situation. On her knees and very tense having come to a very deep part of the beach. Alex doesn’t like not being able to touch the bottom, or see it. Kara is using the paddle, obviously using a bit of her super strength with how quickly they are going.

“What you laughing at?” Alex snaps.

“Nothing.” Emma smiles sadly at her while wiping the tears from her face. She swings her legs around and places them either side of the board. When the paddle board comes alongside Emma’s, Kara moves to sit down. Causing Alex to shriek as the board rocks dangerously. Emma reaches out and steadies it while trying not to laugh.

“Sorry Alex!” Kara apologises before turning her attention to Emma. “You okay?”

Immediately Emma’s smile drops and her eyes fill with tears again. She furiously rubs her eyes to stop them. “Yea fine.”

“No you’re not.” Alex sighs, hating seeing her sister look so unhappy.

“Guessing you heard?” Emma looks at Kara who nods sadly. Crinkle on her forehead evident of her concern. Emma looks down at her hands, not able to look at her sisters anymore. “I just… I get why…” Emma exhales deeply. “It just hurts you know. We are so in sync with each other and I honestly can’t imagine having to restart all that again.”

“But you will.” Alex reaches out and touches Emma’s linked hands. “Because your voice, your music needs to be heard Em.”

“Yea it's one of my favourite sounds, like ever.” Kara agrees. “But you know you will always have us, right?”

Emma nods, allowing a few more tears to fall.

Alex reaches out and wipes the tears from Emma’s cheeks. “And yes it sucks right in this moment but you will get through this. We will both help you through this.”

“Totally.” Kara agrees.

“Thanks.” Somehow Alex manages to hug Emma without falling in and Kara joins them.

Right on queue Kara’s stomach rumbles. “Oh and lunch is ready.”

“Uh oh the monsters coming.” Emma smirks as she looks at her alien sister.

“Race ya?!” Kara jumps to her feet making the board rock dangerously and had Emma not been holding Alex the red head would have fallen in. After making sure her sisters were okay Emma waves them off.

“Nah, you go on ahead, I’ll be right behind you.”

Emma watches her sisters go, hoping Kara has enough control not to cause Alex to fall in too far from the beach. She keeps her eyes fixed on them, slowly following in case Alex needed her. But when they reach the shore Emma lets out the breath she didn’t realise she was holding. Emma chuckles when Kara returns the paddle board they borrowed to get to her.

Shaking her head Emma starts slowly paddling into the swell and waits, her board moving with the ocean. Suddenly she feels a shift. Emma lies on her stomach and starts paddling hard. She smiles as her board gets picked up by the huge wave. Whooping as her board flies through the tube, she reaches out and skims her hand along the break. She comes out the other end and using the momentum turns her board, shooting her closer to the beach. Until finally her board slows down and she jumps off, wading the short distance to the shore.

“Hey!” A surfer approaches her, smiling flirtatiously. His brunette hair slicked back from the sea.

“Hi.” Emma responds while picking up her board.

“That was a sweet wave you just did!” His enthusiasm makes Emma smile.

“Thanks, kind of wish it went on forever.” She admits, cause really there was nothing like going through the tube of a wave. The colours and sounds were breathtaking.

“Ah man I know right?!” He laughs. “So, I was wondering if I could have your number?”

“EMMA!” She turns to look at Kara who is waving her arms about wildly. Most likely due to Alex saying she can’t eat until Emma joins them.

“Thank you but I’m kind of not available. Sorry.”

“No worries at all.” He looks slightly disappointed but still smiles.

“EMMAAAAAA!!!”

Emma laughs at how Kara’s yells got even louder. “Well I better go, don’t want my sister getting any more hangry.” Emma starts to walk back to the group.

“It was a pleasure meeting you, Emma.” He calls after her.

Emma swings round but continues walking backwards. “You too.” She turns back around, smiling and shaking her head.

As soon as Emma gets near, Kara is loading her plate up at top, human, speed. Emma chuckles at the sight and digs the end of her board into the sand before taking the leash off and flopping onto the picnic blanket.

“Who was that?” Kelly asked across from her. Lena pretends she isn’t listening in as she gets some food.

“Oh just some guy congratulating me on my sweet wave.” Emma imitates the guy's accent which makes them laugh.

“And he wanted her number!” Kara teases while she sits next to Emma.

Whistles and ooo’s sound around the group. Alex watches bemused as Lena purses her lips before going back to a neutral expression.

“So where’s the number?” Sam asks excitedly, not missing Lena’s rigid posture.

“Meh, not my type.” Emma tries to play it off cooly while she grabs her top and shorts to change into again. Not minding that they will get a bit damp as the sun is out in full blaze. She also applies her suncream handing it around and reminding everyone to keep it topped up.

“Since when has hunky surfer boy not been your type?” Kara asks confused as she focuses on the surfer. “Honestly I could grate cheese on his abs!”

“Kara!” Emma laughs loudly while she dishes up a plate of food.

“You also said you weren’t available,” Kara presses on, missing the looks Alex was giving her. “Who's the lucky guy or gal?” Emma had come out as bisexual when she was a young teenager. Her Mom and sister’s supported her and Emma was glad she could do the same for Alex when she came out to her. Alex had even flown out specially to where Emma was gigging to tell her. At first Emma was really worried when Alex avoided eye contact and was nervously fidgeting in her seat. When Alex finally blurted it out Emma held her sister close. Saying how proud she was of her and her love for her sister hadn’t changed.

“No one, I just wanted to get him off my back.” Emma says nonchalantly but inside she was freaking out. She’d said it because yes she wasn’t available because her heart belonged to Lena.

Kelly gives Alex a look and watches as Emma settles in-between Lena and Kara under the umbrella they were sitting under. Alex doesn’t miss how much closer Emma sits to Lena than her sister.

The Superfriends continue talking and when everyone has finished eating they split off to do their own thing. Alex and Kelly go for a walk, mainly to come up with a plan to get Emma and Lena together. While Kara, J'onn, Sam, Nia, Brainy and James play volleyball. Girls and against boys. “Original.” Emma mutters causing Lena to snort.

Lena and Emma opt to stay with everyones stuff. Lena is happy to sit back against the pile and read a book she’s been wanting to read for months but never had the chance.

Emma sighs as she looks at her guitar case. Twiddling her thumbs for a moment she draws her knees to her chest and watches the waves. But not feeling quite ready to get back in.

After half an hour Lena puts her book down and focuses on Emma. “Something on your mind?” Lena asks, nudging her shoulder into Emma, causing the blonde to sway.

“Guessing Kara told you?” Emma keeps her eyes fixed in front of her.

“Yes, she was relaying what was being said.” Lena says apologetically.

“It’s okay. Makes it easier in a way.” Sighing heavily Emma turns to look at Lena. Who is watching her with concern. “I just don’t know what to do. I need to look for new bandmates, but that just seems so daunting. Can I really go through that all again?” Emma runs her hands through her hair. Huffing she looks back into emerald eyes. “Okay if we don’t talk about it? Just enjoy what we have right now?”

“And what do we have?”

“Great company, good food and a wonderful view.” Emma motions to the beach around them.

“Yea, I can do that.” Lena keeps her eyes on Emma.

“Go back to your book Lee. I’ll be fine.” Emma tries to smile reassuringly.

Lena doesn’t buy it but starts reading again. She watches Emma from the corner of her eye as she shuffles over to her guitar case, opening it and pulling the guitar out, making sure it is in tune.

Emma gets her songbook out of her case, opening the page to a song she had started writing. Making sure she doesn’t hit Lena with her guitar Emma settles back down. Grabbing her phone she hits record and starts plucking. Softly singing to herself.

Tell me somethin', girl Are you happy in this modern world? Or do you need more? Is there somethin' else you're searchin' for?

Emma pauses as she remembers a chorus of a song she’s been working on. She quickly flips to that page and moves her fingers to find the chords. She continues to play. Not realising her soft singing has steadily got louder.

I'm falling

Emma sees Lena in her mind as she sings. Her pain at falling for her friend and not having the courage to take it deeper.

In all the good times I find myself Longin' for change And in the bad times I fear myself

Sighing Emma looks at the sea before turning her head slightly to look at the raven haired beauty. Whose focus is on the book in front of her. Returning her attention to her notebook Emma keeps playing and singing.

I'm off the deep end, watch as I dive in I'll never meet the ground Crash through the surface, where they can't hurt us We're far from the shallow now

Lifting her head she focuses on the sea again.

In the shallow, shallow

In the shallow, shallow In the shallow, shallow We're far from the shallow now.

Emma pauses and stops the recording. Running a hand through her hair which starts getting more wavy from getting wet.

“Wow Em.” Lena breathes out.

Emma turns to Lena who put the book next to her. “You like that?”

“Yes, seriously… I don’t have the words.”

“Thanks, it’s not really finished. It needs another verse…” Emma goes through her notebook but comes up empty. Replaying the first verse Emma closes her eyes to figure out the words for the second verse.

Tell me something, boy

“What rhymes with boy?” Emma mutters to herself. “Toy? No… Void?”

Aren't you tired tryin' to fill that void?

Emma sighs as she remembers friends she has lost due to depression and addiction. Knowing how hard it is to feel whole and get out of the pit.

Or do you need more? Ain't it hard keeping it so hardcore?

She sings through the bridge and the chorus again, making sure it all fits. But to her horror she realises she stopped the recording.

“Crap!” Looking down her phone wasn’t where she left it. Instead it's in Lena’s hand.

“I could see you didn’t press record so I did it for you.” Lena answers Emma’s questioning gaze as she presses the button to stop the recording.

“Thanks Lee.” Emma takes her phone and grabs her pen, listening to the recording and writing the song out in full with the chords.

Lena watches Emma. “Do you usually write songs that quickly?” Lena asks, fascinated.

Emma laughs in response. “No, not usually. I guess I was more inspired.” She shrugs, placing her guitar back in the case with her notebook. She shuffles back over to Lena. “Can I?”

Lena looks up and nods, letting Emma lean down, resting her head in Lena’s lap. They do this quite often and it always makes Lena’s heart skip a beat. Slowly she puts her book down beside her and runs a hand through Emma’s hair. Looking at the view and doing what Emma said, enjoying the moment.

Time passes on and Emma watches the group playing volleyball. Kelly and Alex have joined them, Kelly staying with the girls while Alex went over to the boys side. Emma smirks when Kara would not so sneakily use her powers to gain an advantage.

But Emma’s attention diverted back to the sea, the tide was coming in and the swell had gotten bigger. Turning her head to look up at Lena Emma pauses. Her eyes linger on Lena’s chest before taking in her profile. ‘Rao she’s so beautiful.’

“Okay if I catch a few more waves?” Emma asks, finding her voice.

Looking down Lena smiles. “Sure.”

“Thanks Lee.” Emma sits up and presses a kiss to Lena’s cheek. As Emma takes her clothes off she grabs her board and runs to the surf. Lena touches her flushed cheek and smiles softly.

Soon the volleyball group end their game, the boys team winning by a few points. They head back to their set up, laughing at how both J'onn and Kara leapt for the ball, only to miss it completely.

“Hi Lena!” Kara says while sitting next to her best friend. “How's the book?”

“It’s…” Lena looks down at the book and realises she’s only got through part of the first chapter. Her attention had mainly been watching Emma surf. “Slow.”

“Ah I hate it when that happens!” Kara hands Lena a drink while they sit and watch Emma. Who had just gone through another tube, much to the excitement of the surfers watching in the shallows. “I don’t know how she makes it look so easy!”

“It’s one of her many talents.” Lena agrees, though there is always a feeling of anxiety whenever anyone she cares for is in any body of water.

“Totally.” Kara says before sighing sadly.

“Kara?” Lena asks concerned for the Super.

“I just… She’s worked so hard. I know she will come back from this, but when Alex and I got to her she… She just looked so broken.” Kara sighs again. Worry filling her eyes as she watches her sister.

“She didn’t want to talk about it. But said how daunting it is to find new bandmates. Which I can understand.” Lena knows how hard it is to make friends in general.

“Yea it’s not the easiest of processes. She needs to click with them, for them to become in sync with each other and then get on with them. How they managed to drive around in that tour bus all over America and later the world is beyond me!” Kara says with wide eyes, she had joined Emma for a few gigs and thankfully the venues weren’t too far from each other. But Kara found the journey long and boring.

“Kara, anything slower then you flying is beyond you!” Lena's teasing causes Kara to laugh loudly.

“True!”

They continue watching Emma who attempts a few aerial tricks. The spray of the sea flying high above her. “She wrote a really beautiful song just now.”

“Really?” Kara perks up and Lena nods. “Think she’ll play it for us?”

“Maybe.” Lena hopes Emma does. She really wants to hear it again.

While Emma still surfs the Superfriends play UNO. Laughing at how competitive Alex is getting and only getting calmed down when Kelly gives her a gentle kiss. 

As the sun starts to slowly descend Emma finally gets out of the sea. Waving goodbye to a group of surfers she had been talking to.

She notices a fire has been built in the centre of the Superfriends circle and a few of them are roasting marshmallows.

Emma’s body is completely shattered but she smiles at the feeling. Making a note to come back here as much as she can. Even if the weather isn’t perfect like today.

The Superfriends greet her while she grabs her stuff to change. Alex stands and uses one of the blankets to block anyone’s view of Emma. Kara joins in and goes to the other side. Emma scoffs knowing full well she can change without showing anything and there has been no paparazzi bothering her.

Finally dry and feeling much warmer Emma sits next to Lena and places her head on her shoulder. She can’t help but yawn and let her eyes drift.

“Tired Em?” Alex teases from across the circle and smiles at Lena whose cheeks are tinged with red.

“Uhmm.” Emma confirms. “Do we have any more food?” She asks, keeping her eyes closed. “Or has Kara eaten it all?”

“Hey!” Kara swats Emma playfully but causes Emma to jump and glare at her. “Sorry! Did I hurt you?” Kara asks, panicked.

“No, I was just surprised.” Emma sighs before resting her head back on Lena’s shoulder.

“Well I did see a pizza place as we drove in. Maybe we can order?” Nia asks.

“Sounds like a good plan to me!” Emma gives a thumbs up. Pizza is one of her favourite foods.

With the joys of technology the friends order and half an hour later a pizza boy with a mountainful of pizza boxes comes towards them. They thank him and dig in. Emma grabs Lena and her pizza, two cans of soda and some salad left over from lunch.

“M’lady.” Emma holds out the cans which Lena takes. “I got some salad too.” Emma places the container in front of Lena.

“Thank you Em.” Lena says touched that Emma thought about her. She opens the lid and wonders how she can eat it. Looking up she sees Emma holding out a knife and fork for her and she smiles.

“You may need this.”

Lena grins back thanking her and takes the cutlery from the blonde.

Emma happily munches away at the pizza, rolling her eyes when the debate about Hawaiian pizza is brought up.

“Personally I don’t see anything wrong with it.” Sam defends laughing at Brainy’s stunned face.

“But to have a fruit on a savoury dish… it just does not compute.”

“Brainy.” Emma gets the alien’s attention. “Have you actually tried it?”

“No I have not.” He looks appalled that Emma would ask that.

“Then how’d you know if it doesn’t work?” Emma tilts her head.

After a moment of thinking Brainy nods. “Fair point.”

“Next game night I will order one and you can try it!” Sam says happily while winking at Emma, who smiles back.

“Just keep it away from me.” Alex says, shivering at the thought.

“Sorry to change the subject, buuutttt, Emma.” Kara says making Emma freeze while her last pizza slice was near her lips. She lowers it slightly while looking at her sister, who is beaming from ear to ear.

“Yea?”

“I saw you working on a song, wanna share it?”

All the Superfriends turn to look at Emma expectantly. Always appreciative of hearing anything Emma is working on. Taking a deep breath she lowers the slice back to the box and wipes her hands on a napkin.

“Peanut, you don’t have too.” Alex says glaring at Kara. Emma would do anything to make her sisters happy, Alex knew this. So did Kara. And yes, they would both exploit it sometimes.

“No, it’s okay. Would be great to get everyone's opinion.” Emma grabs her guitar and notebook. Reminding herself of the chords. “So… This… Well…” Sighing heavily, Emma closes her eyes to control her nerves. “I kind of imagine this as a duet, but with, well, the band breaking up. I may have to rethink it a bit.” Emma focuses on the fire in front of her, feeling too embarrassed to look at anyone.

She starts playing the chords and sings. Allowing the music to wash over and for her voice to carry with the wind. Emma adds the new verse but as she nears the end she feels her emotions take over, her frustration at her situation and the need to release it. She improvises. Closing her eyes and allowing herself to go with it.

Whoa-oh-ah-oh-ahh

Emma belts out, slamming her fingers into the guitar strings as she increases in passion and volume.

I'm off the deep end, watch as I dive in I'll never meet the ground Crash through the surface, where they can't hurt us We're far from the shallow now

A smile graces Emma’s face as she lifts her head.

In the shallow, shallow In the shallow, shallow

Emma softens her voice, allowing the natural end of the song to take place.

In the shallow, shallow We're far from the shallow now.

Emma allows the last chord to hold longer than necessary. She keeps her eyes closed and waits.

A huge roar around her causes her to jump and open her eyes. A crowd has gathered round the group and are applauding her. The Superfriends all clap wildly too, Alex wipes tears from her face and Kara beams as brightly as the sun. Emma turns to look at Lena and her smile is as bright, if not brighter then Kara’s. Her green eyes simmering with tears. Emma watches as one falls and she gently reaches out and wipes it away with her thumb.

She then acknowledges the crowd with a small wave and thanks them with a bow of her head. They soon disperse, returning to their own groups and Emma sighs in relief.

“So, was the song okay?” Emma asks while picking at a chipped bit of wood on the base of her guitar.

“Okay?” Alex's voice booms causing Emma to quickly look at her sister. Alex’s eyes are wide. “Okay? Em that song… Wow I don’t have the words!”

“That’s what Lena said.” Emma smiles at the two women.

“Well it’s true.” Lena grins back, nudging her shoulder into the blonde’s.

The other Superfriends nod and agree.

“It really moved me.” Sam says smiling at Emma who blushes in response.

“Yes.” Brainy adds. “Very- touching.” Nia smiles at him. Emma grins too, happy Brainy was able to express himself.

Emma plays a few more well known songs and the Superfriends join in. But as the sun dips slowly into the horizon Emma stops and hands the guitar to James who continues playing. Not as well as Emma but enough.

Emma heads back towards the surf, wading in up to below her knees. Taking deep breaths she watches the colours change, memorising the rich reds, oranges and yellows. Lena comes and stands next to her. They watch in comfortable silence and Lena links her fingers with Emma’s. They smile softly to each other before watching the sun dip under the horizon.

(Part Two)

[suituuup]

pieces - chapter five

Five years ago, Chloe dropped off the face of the Earth. Beca didn't expect to see her again dancing in a strip club, out of all places.

rated: E (drug use and emotional abuse)

ao3 link

*

As the rest of the day ticked by, Beca kept replaying the events at Sarah’s coffee shop over and over, unable to pinpoint what she could have said to make Chloe bolt like that. She managed to focus on her tasks at hand over the afternoon and headed home around 6, groaning as soon as she stepped inside when she remembered she had promised Sarah to cook her dinner. 

She pondered on canceling for half a minute because all she felt like doing was taking a long shower and eating pizza in bed, but she already felt guilty about a lot of things these past couple of days. 

So she took a quick shower instead and put on some comfy jeans and a plaid shirt, tossing her blow-dried hair in a messy bun atop her head. With one of her favorite blues records playing throughout her home, Beca set to work to make creamy salmon pasta with spinach, nursing a much-needed glass of wine as she cooked. 

“Babe?” 

“In the kitchen,” Beca called out over the music, lowering the heat on the boiling water and dropping a handful of spaghetti in. She smiled as Sarah brushed a kiss to her cheek. “Hey.” 

“Hello you,” Sarah murmured, squeezing her hip as she walked past her to set a bottle of wine on the counter. “Smells delicious.” 

“Hopefully it tastes good, too.” Not that Beca was worried; she had been making this dish for a few years. “Wine?” 

Sarah hopped onto the counter next, humming. “Yes, please.” 

Beca opened the fridge and took the bottle out, reaching on the tip of her toes (shhh) for a glass in the cabinet over her head. She poured some wine in and handed it to Sarah. “Sorry I disappeared earlier.”

After Chloe had left, Beca wasn’t in the mood to eat or finish her coffee, leaving a $20 on the table on her way out. 

“Was that the friend you told me about yesterday?” 

Beca puffed out a sigh. “Yeah. She’s…” It’s complicated, Beca was about to say, but she figured she owed Sarah some details after what happened at her workplace. “She’s in a bad place. And I wanna help her, but she doesn’t seem to want any help. I don’t know what to do anymore.” 

Sarah covered Beca’s hand with her own, the pad of her thumb stroking her skin back and forth. “Has it been a long time since you last saw each other?” 

“Over six years. We fell out of touch about five years ago. Well, she cut us all out of her life nearly overnight.” 

Sarah tilted her head to the side. “Us?” 

“The Bellas, from college. Chloe and I were co-captains.” Beca swallowed around the lump forming in her throat as a wave of nostalgia hit her with full force. “She just… she was my best friend.” 

“I’m sorry, baby. Maybe give her some time and she’ll come around?” 

Beca doubted that, but she nodded anyway. “Yeah, maybe.” She shook her head, squeezing Sarah’s hand as she mustered a smile. “Enough about me. How was your day?” 

As the next week ticked by, Beca started to lose hope. In true Beca Mitchell fashion, she threw herself into work to avoid dealing with her emotions, staying at the office until midnight most days. 

A knock on her open-door one night made her jolt. She had lost herself in the view and her own thoughts, unaware someone was still at the office. 

Beca spun her chair around to face the door, finding Luke in the doorway. “Why are you here so late?” 

“I could ask you the same thing,” Luke pointed out, inviting himself in. He set a sheet of paper in front of Beca, then plopped down in the seat on the other side of her desk. “This is incredible. You’ve got to record it.” 

Beca glanced down at her own handwriting, heavily regretting showing Luke that song she wrote a few days ago. “I don’t know, man.” 

“What?” Luke asked, incredulous. “Becky, you haven’t been able to write a lyric for the past three years and now that you’ve got a platinum record worthy song, you don’t want to use it?”

Beca nibbled on the inside of her cheek. “It feels too personal, I’m not sure I feel like sharing it with the world.” She glared at him next. “And stop calling me Becky, this is getting old.” 

“I’m serious, this might be your best work yet,” Luke insisted. “Think about it?”

“I will. Now get out of my office,” Beca muttered.

“You got it, Becky,” Luke teased, easily catching the stress ball Beca tossed at his head, chuckling at her poor attempt. “You should go home and get some sleep.” 

“Yeah. Night.” 

“Goodnight.” 

*

It turned out Sarah had been right. 

When Beca wasn’t expecting it anymore, Chloe called. And she sounded like Chloe. Hope flared within her once more, but she tried not to let it engulf her whole being. While Chloe reaching out was an enormous step, Beca threaded carefully, knowing a lot could happen in five days. 

She wished she had been wrong, but as it pushed 1 pm that Thursday afternoon, it was pretty clear Chloe wouldn’t show. Beca didn’t have her phone number or any other way to contact her. Her heart felt heavy as she headed back to BMLJ for her meeting with Jesse regarding his movie score, and her head was too full of thoughts to completely focus on work. 

“Earth to Beca.” 

Beca hummed, snapping out of her daze. Jesse was staring at her in a mix of concern and curiosity. “Sorry.” 

“Do you wanna do this another time?” 

“No, no,” Beca insisted, straightening up. “I’m okay.” She hated how well Jesse knew her, and heaved a sigh when he gave her that look. “It’s Chloe.” 

“Chloe Beale?” Jesse asked. “She’s in New York?” 

“Yeah. I found her a couple of weeks ago. She’s a stripper at some hyped club in Times Square.” 

“Holy shit, seriously?” 

Beca proceeded to tell him everything over the next ten minutes, Jesse hanging onto every word. “Am I stupid? Trying so hard to help someone who clearly doesn’t want to be helped?” 

“No, you’re not stupid. You’re a softie under that tough exterior and you care deeply about the people you love. Especially Chloe. I was in the front row, remember?” 

Beca grimaced, some of that decade-old guilt surfacing. “Dude…” 

“It’s fine. I’m definitely over all of that, but we both know Chloe is too important for you to just give up. And from how you described her, and that phone call? It sounds like she still cares, but she lost herself along the way and is now in so deep she has trouble coming back on her own. Maybe she just needs to hear that asking for help isn’t giving up, but rather refusing to give up.” 

Those words echoed deep within Beca, and she found herself nodding, filled with newfound energy to fight for this. “I need to go by the club. Tonight. Her boss might kick me out if I show up inside, but maybe I can wait by the back door?” 

“I’ll come with you.” 

“You don’t have to, man. It might be hours before we see her.” 

“That guy sounds creepy, you shouldn’t go on your own.” 

Beca sighed. “Okay, fine. I’ll pick you up around ten.” 

*

Beca felt like they were on a stake-out as they waited in her car hours later, parked across the back alley of the club. Winter had definitely settled in in NYC and waiting in the cold for hours in freezing temperatures didn’t seem like a great plan. 

She texted back and forth with Aubrey, who once more offered to come down, but Beca was concerned Chloe might think they were ambushing her. 

It was pushing midnight by the time a familiar figure stepped out of the building through the side door. Chloe was on her own. 

Beca slapped Jesse’s arm to wake him up. “She’s here.” 

They both stepped out of the car and crossed the street when it was clear, Beca telling Jesse to wait by the corner as she tentatively approached Chloe, slipping her gloved hands inside the pockets of her dark grey wool trench coat. 

She was smoking a cigarette, clad in her glitter dress under an open fleece jacket. Her gaze flickered to Beca when she spotted her, her posture turning rigid. “What are you doing here?” 

There was no bite to her tone but soft curiosity, which reassured Beca further. 

“Can we talk?” 

Chloe glanced over her shoulder towards the door as she nibbled on her lower lip. “Five minutes, then I have to go back inside.”

She met Beca on the other side of the alley, the orange glow of the lamp post over their heads allowing Beca to trace her features. “You didn’t show earlier.” 

Chloe dragged on her cigarette. “I changed my mind.”

“Is that the truth or did someone tell you not to?” She wasn’t dumb; after meeting Chloe’s boss and knowing she was his favorite, she had an inkling the two were somehow involved. And that guy just gave off a crazy possessive vibe. Chloe’s silence was her answer. “Chlo…” 

“It’s more complicated than you think,” Chloe murmured, licking her lips. 

“Then explain it to me,” she demanded, a desperate edge to her tone. 

“Why are you doing this?” Chloe croaked out. “Why won’t you leave me alone?” 

Her question took Beca by surprise, and her mouth moved wordlessly for a few beats. “Because I care about you. And you’re not okay, Chlo. I want to help.” 

“Beca…” 

She thought back on Jesse’s words. “Asking for help is not giving up, Chloe. It’s refusing to give up. And I’m here. You just have to say the word, I’ve got you.” 

Chloe shook her head, closing her eyes briefly. “I’m not--” Her eyes were filled with so much sadness when they found Beca’s that Beca had to remind herself to breathe. “I’m not worth it.” 

Those four words felt like a knife lodging itself inside Beca’s heart. They stole all the air from her lungs and brought tears to her eyes. “What?” She whispered, her voice nowhere within reach as a huge lump formed in her throat. “That’s not true,” she said, with more forcefulness this time around. “It’s not, you hear me?” 

Chloe kept shaking her head. “You don’t know me anymore.” 

“Maybe I don’t know this version of you, but I know Chloe Beale is still in there, somewhere. I heard her on the phone the other day, remember? And I can see her now, under all those layers of sadness and lack of self-worth triggered by outside factors. I know her soul hasn’t changed, deep down. It couldn’t have, because you are the purest, kindest human being there is, and that has to still be somewhere in there.” 

“I’m broken, Bec,” Chloe cried, her eyes filled to the rim with tears threatening to spill over. “I’m a crack addict. I don’t--” A sob spilled from her throat. “I spend all my money on coke and all I know how to do anymore is show my breasts for money.” 

A tear rolled down Beca’s cheek as she reached for Chloe’s hand. “Then I’ll help put you back together. Piece by piece, for however long it takes. Whatever it takes, Chlo. I promise.” 

“Chloe?” 

Both their heads snapped towards the open door, where Marco stood. His features hardened when he saw Beca there, and Beca released Chloe’s hand, looking over her shoulder towards Jesse, who made his way over. 

“What is she doing here?” He spat out as he climbed down the set of steps. 

Chloe visibly swallowed, her fear radiating off her. “She’s just leaving.” 

“No, I’m not,” Beca stated, loud and clear as her eyes shone fiercely. “I’m not going anywhere without Chloe.” 

“You fucking homewrecker,” he muttered, crossing the alley in quick strides. Chloe stepped in front of Beca, as though to shield her with her own body. The anger swirling in his eyes shot a chill down Beca’s spine. “Move, Chloe.” 

Chloe shook her head. “You should go back inside, Marco. Please don’t make a scene, it’s not worth it.” 

Beca had never understood the expression ‘to see red’ until now; until she witnessed Marco backhanding Chloe with so much force she staggered back with a cry. 

Unparalleled rage filled her, the kind of rage she couldn’t control. She stepped forward and raised her fist, clocking him in the face with a mean right hook. She wasn’t sure if the cracking sound came from her knuckle or his nose breaking, the pain in her hand muffled by the adrenaline coursing through her veins. 

Marco stumbled a few steps backward with a grunt, his eyes screwed shut as he covered his nose with his hand. But Beca wasn’t done, taking advantage of his dizzy state and stepping forward to knee him in the balls as hard as she could so he couldn’t walk until they were all safely inside the car. 

“You guys get into the car,” Jesse ushered them, keeping an eye on Marco as he doubled over in pain. 

“Chloe, come on,” Beca coaxed urgently, grabbing her hand and pulling. To her surprise, Chloe didn’t fight her. She seemed absolutely shell-shocked, even once they reached the car, as though her legs were carrying her on their own accord and her brain was miles behind. “Get inside, Chlo.” 

Jesse jogged over a few seconds later and slid behind the wheel without Beca having to ask him, and she climbed in the backseat beside Chloe, relief washing over as the doors locked behind them and the car pulled onto the road towards safety. 

[seanfalco]

To Hurt | Nathan Young x Reader

Wrote this sometime last year when I was having a bad night, but then talked myself out of posting it. Went back to it tonight bc I’m back in the same place and finished it. Figured maybe it might help someone else feel better too.

A vent piece in a similar vein as Comfort.

word count: 1.1k

warning(s): language, depictions of self harm

You wanted to hurt.

You wanted to hurt as badly on the outside as you did inside. That thought hadn’t surfaced in a long while, not since you’d left your stepmum’s, so the fact that it did now scared you.

It scared you a lot.

But It would be so easy. Hurting yourself. You’d done it before, many times, in so many different ways.

Jumping up, you balled your hand into a fist as you faced the bedroom wall and punched as hard as you could.

It only took a moment of anger, a moment of frustration and it was over... but the pain that traveled up your arm seemed to shock you awake.

Oh, it hurt worse than you’d thought.

Already your hand was beginning to swell, throbbing hard enough to bring fresh tears to your eyes and you shook your hand, a choked sob escaping your lips. Shit, did you break it? You couldn’t move your fingers.

“[y/n]? Th’fuck was that noise?” Nathan’s voice called from the other room and you just stood there, pressing your back to the wall and sliding to the ground. The apartment was small, you knew he’d find you soon.

How were you supposed to explain this?

Raising your eyes you stared at the crack in the wall where your fist had just made contact. You were probably gunna lose your safety deposit for that.

“[y/n]? Oh, Jesus!” Nathan exclaimed as his eyes went from the hole in the wall to the steadily darkening black and purple bruises covering your knuckles. Crouching in front of you he winced as he took your hand to get a closer look before his eyes flicked back to your tear stained face, your makeup no doubt a mess.

“What happened?” he asked, though it was pretty clear what happened.

With a sniffle, you shrugged halfheartedly, unable to quite make your voice work. When you didn’t answer, merely averting your eyes ashamedly, Nathan let out a long breath.

“I’ll get some ice,” he muttered, leaving you with your guilt, the empty pit inside you threatening to swallow you whole. He was only gone a minute, back with a baggie of ice and a towel and you couldn’t stomach the worry lurking behind his green eyes as he wrapped the towel round your hand, to hold the ice bag in place.

Pressing his back against the wall next to you, he drew his knees up to his chest and you felt his hand brush your non injured one. Letting him thread his fingers with yours you felt another wave of self loathing coming and you almost wrenched your hand away, instead squeezing his fingers hard, desperately holding onto him.

“Why’d you do that?” Nathan asked, watching you from the corner of his eye, his head pressed back against the wall as he worried his lip with his teeth.

“I wanted to hurt,” you murmured softly. “We don’t all get blackout drunk when we hate ourselves.”

At your words, Nathan grimaced and you felt shame wash through you, a stray tear falling down your cheek. “I’m sorry…” you muttered, shaking your head, sniffling thickly. “Are y’mad about the wall?”

Nathan turned to gape at you incredulously. “No! God, no! Fuck th’wall, who cares bout that? We’ll hang a poster or somethin’ over it. I’m worried bout you. I’ve never seen yeh like this before,” he exclaimed, shakily.

“Don’t you ever just feel like you’re not good enough?” you whispered, your voice cracking.

Silence stretched and Nathan nodded, leaning against you. “Are y’kiddin’? I always feel that way.” He swallowed and turned to face you. “But you… you’re the best damn thing t’ever happen t’me, and I think you’re better than good enough. I wouldn’t trade you for all the money or--or booze, or blowjobs in th’world! I’m serious!” he exclaimed, picking up speed. “An, y’know how much I love all those things.”

For a moment you nearly cracked a smile, but Nathan caught it.

“Next time you feel like this, tell me an’ I’ll distract you. Or we’ll go out an’ break something or vandalize something instead. Fuck, we could even steal your stepsister’s car again and crash it, just for th’hell of it. But yeh don’t hafta do this alone. That’s why I’m here, yeah?”

Oh no, you thought, here come the fuckin’ waterworks, but Nathan was quick to pull you into his lap, and he didn’t care if you got his shirt wet from crying against his chest. He merely began to murmur all his favourite things about you into your ear, each thing cheesier than the last til he got you to finally laugh, even if it was a watery one.

“There, see,” he murmured looking rather proud of himself, “I’ll earn my keep yet.”

“Thank you,” you managed to sniffle and Nathan wiped the last few stray tears from your cheeks before pressing a kiss to your forehead.

“‘Course, like I said, that’s what I’m here for, love.”

Flexing your hand, you grimaced at the sting, pulling the ice bag from it. At least you could move it; it seemed less likely that it was broken now.

“What am I s’posed t’tell people bout this? It’s not exactly… subtle,” you sighed, already regretting your actions and Nathan grinned slightly.

“We’ll tell em… you got in a fistfight with a mugger and that you won.”

Though you looked skeptical you felt somewhat lighter, buoyed by Nathan’s easy grin and his jokes.

“C’mon, I think its time for a proper snuggle,” he exclaimed and you didn’t argue, letting him carry you to the bed before folding you into his arms.

“I meant it when I said you’re th’best thing t’ever happen t’me, y’know?” he murmured, taking your face between his hands. “I don’t wanna lose you... you know what I mean?” he asked, giving you a pointed look, as if saying it aloud might make it happen and once more white hot shame washed through you.

“I know, I’m sorry,” you whispered, clutching at his shirt with your good hand.

“Please don’t do that again?” he insisted, his eyes seeking yours, all trace of amusement gone, and you nodded.

“I won’t, I promise.”

Hearing the sincerity in your voice, Nathan seemed to relax, pressing his lips to your forehead before tilting your chin up to kiss your lips.

“Good, cause I don’t think the wall’ll hold up if you hit it again. You’re too strong,” he teased. “It’s be like kapow! and then turn into rubble or somethin’, and then we’d hafta share one big open flat with th’neighbors, and I don’t know about you [y/n], but I don’t think I’d like that. There goes all our privacy!”

When he got you to laugh, really laugh, a proud smile stole across his face, his expression lighting up hopefully as he watched you.

“Hey Nathan,” you murmured, as your giggles finally died down.

“Yeah?”

“I love you.”

“I love you, too.”

[surviving---not---living]

What the fuck do I do?...

**tw emotional/physical abuse mentions**

posted this on reddit with different ages and such so he wont find it but he doesnt use tumblr so I wanted to post here to see if yall had some suggestions as well any help would be greatly appreciated or to just know someone read would also be enough... with that said I'll paste the post.

to start I'm 23f and the fiance is 38m

I have an idea of what i should do i just sincerely dont want to i dont want to leave him homeless and without money or a job...

but the last few months have me scared and confused...

(during arguments he let's me write down what's happening when I hear something that stands out to me in Hope's itll help me fix my behaviour i got from my parents so ive been able to write down exact wording on some things said) theres just so much going on...

to preface this hes never been physically abusive to me and thankfully it's not there yet. in his defense though i was raised very incorrectly due to shit parents and I have a lot of mental issues that cause self sabotage, delusional thinking- meaning If I personally believe something it usually takes a small war to get my mind to recognize im actually wrong, as well as terrible memory so if I do acknowledge I've done something wrong more often than not my head forgets what happened or what i even did wrong if anything and the next time it inevitably happens again I have no information to pull from to tell me what I did was wrong or why. so basically I'm kind of a fuck up, I'm doing my best to fix my shit but yeah my fiance has been dealing with all of that for 4 years now.

(*some minorly important issues

•he's been interrupting me not letting me finish what I'm saying and just outright changing the topic since we first got together, although wrong of me I started doing that as well because i saw no other way to be able to speak to him except even when I'm doing the exact same shit hes doing it seems like hes the only allowed to be upset.

•we were in an open relationship except he didnt follow the rules we agreed to one time and that broke my trust I had for him. we said no coworkers, we said only people we were both interested in we said no one that's taken and yet all of those got broken over an ugly bitch. and I still get shit for bringing it up to this day.

•he said that until I start prefacing all of my conversations with him he wont count any attempt I've made at talking to him about my problems. so basically everything I've tried talking to him about doesnt fucking matter and it doesnt fucking count. not even when I tried telling him 3 separate times I'm feeling suicidal to top it off everytime i mentioned it, it ended in an argument.

•he told me he got suicidal thoughts for the first time in 10 years due to me and honestly I didnt know how to fucking respond to that. it made me sad yeah but where was the care I needed when I brought up the same thing? where was his give a fuck hes supposed to show if he actually cares about me??

•he says he interrupts me because what I have to say is either false, not grounded in reality, or they're excuses. except he has little to no way of knowing any of that is true unless he hears me all the way out I could be agreeing with him and he still interrupts and gets pissed.

•I believe hes a hypocrite but he says nah hes only doing this because I'm doing bad.

•hes said multiple times that i wont see any improvement in him until he sees I've got my shit together. even though hes the one that caused the first problems in this relationship I'm supposed to be the first one to fix my shit? instead of both of us working on our shit together??? and when I ask those questions he responds with yes you are supposed to be the first one to fix your shit because I'm at the end of my rope and I wont take this anymore.)

but on to why I've been scared. this person told me he used to be abusive with an equally abusive ex for many reasons and after splitting up he vowed to never do that again and never end up like they did.

fast forward to our relationship and well a few months ago he told me he wanted to hit me and made it a point to say he wasnt going to but he really wanted to.

he said that because we were both in my car and he wanted to leave with the car except I wasnt going to get out of MY car so he started yelling, i got scared and left later on he told me that was the first time hes ever wanted to hit me and I should think about what it is I did to get him to that point. after that I left it alone for a month because things got a bit better and then came the next time he said he wanted to hit me. now I dont remember the reason for him saying it the second time but I wasnt going to let that slip as easily as the first so I spoke up about it and what he had to say about me telling him it made me scared of him to know he wanted to hit me was " well if you Weren't a coward, normally when someone says they want to hit you it's a signal that you're doing something so wrong that they want to hit you." and me knowing him i knew this was one of those times he just wasnt going to budge.

so on to the next argument.

he told me I'm the one who thrust those thoughts into him, that I'm the reason they ever came to be, I'm why the exist in the first place. and he doesnt seem to understand when I say that no I'm not the reason your head wants to hurt me they exist there because of your last relationship letting that be an option. he also said he keeps the option of abuse in his head with a line in front of it to remind him to never pass that line and he doesn't understand that keeping that idea in his head at all is not a good thing because now the option is available whether you want to take it or not and

he. just. kept. arguing. and defending.

now on to the last argument.

he says he wants me to stop putting him in a position to do all the thinking and decision making for me, when I've asked him multiple times to stop doing that because I want to do shit for myself and all he keeps saying is show me that you can actually think for yourself and I'll stop needing to do that. like motherfucker at least give me the time to make decisions or thoughts.

I know it's not his fault that I take longer to process things but he knows this fact and keeps expecting me to already have a response half a second later to something I'm barely registering 5 seconds after it happened and again yes I know its something I have to work on and I am but atm it's still an existing issue.

hes trying to call thinking for me and making decisions for me "a gift" (the exact context for him saying this wasnt written down as I was too upset at the audacity of that claim.)

he wants me to show overwhelming efforts to fix my fucked behavioral issues but the efforts I'm putting in atm dont matter to him and that hes hanging on a single thread hes no longer willing to take anything but Absolute compliance(yes he used the actual words absolute compliance) if he doesnt see me losing sleep to figure out and fix my shit he wont be convinced I'm trying. he ended that segment with him saying hes not using these words to control or manipulate me. he says this is a requirement a yes or no and he wont make his decision on whether he wants to break up with me until I say yes or no to his absolute compliance. he said his decision is solely based on my answer and If i say yes i dont get to back off or get out of it.

I also wrote down a quote he said that was just so arrogant i couldnt leave it out.

"You sit before an artisan of problem solving." -my fiance

soo haha yeahh the last argument happened right before going to bed and I started typing this as soon as I got up and finished my hygiene stuff.

I'm pretty sure if he had never told me he'd wanted to hit me this wouldn't be such a difficult thing to answer... I love him and I have no idea if I should pick him and risk any form of my safety or just let him leave me.. he has no job, no money, and no family to go to.. I know he doesnt care about being homeless but I do care..I fucking love him and I dont want that for him not even for a day... as shitty as he and I can both be I still dont believe that's what he deserves... if he ever finds this hell be even more pissed that I'm even concerned about what he'll do if he leaves.. he always told me to not care and that if I ever do want to leave him to not worry about that and just get it over with sooner.. thing is I dont want to leave I just want my baby back... the one that didnt yell or didnt want to hit me at all... I want our old relationship back.. I guess I want to know if that's even possible at this point. any words from anyone would be really nice right now.. if only to just feel like someone's talking to me.. my fiance is literally the only person I talk to and the closest thing to a friend I have. and i dont tell my parents any of what's happening because they're stressed enough so I've been basically alone for 4 years with no one but my fiance to talk to..

granted it's my fault I havent made other friends but I've been so stressed recently that I havent done much about it for many reasons..

update: he just finished telling me that hes only had half a burger in the last 3 days, (due to stress) he just wanted to let me know that apparently.

[carmenxjulia]

I put together a transcript of the 2 hour Q&A Interview the Carmen Sandiego Discord did with Showrunner Duane Capizzi. All of the questions were submitted by server members. You can read everything below the break!

Duane Capizzi:

Hi there!

Am I in? Is this thing on?

PizzaHorse:

Hi, welcome!

Yep, you're in the right place!

Duane Capizzi:

Sorry I'm late, I was wandering around some empty Discord hallways looking for the right room haha

PizzaHorse:

No worries. Let's get started!

Who is your favorite character?

Duane Capizzi:

Moose Boy!

KIDDING!

Alright, how to NOT get myself in trouble if my answer isn't "Carmen" haha.

But really, they are ALL my babies.

So I know it's going to sound like a cop out to some that I can't pick just one. But hmm, some for instances...

I love that she's so morally evolved at such a young age; her ability to always take the high road and never lower herself; her drive and conviction and dedication. Her ability to kick serious booty and look good while doing it. Her progressive values, her fashion sense. I could go on and on. But then there's Shadowsan and his arc; Chase and his. Julia, who's every bit as strong as Carmen but shows it in different ways. The Cleaners don't get enough love.

I'll close that question with an anecdote about The Cleaners ...

I love that all our characters are embraced and that everyone seems to have favorites. Our sound engineer Marcel is a pretty serious guy: he has a serious job that takes high levels of focus and attention. He's always deeply focused and not prone to small talk. Anyway, we were in the middle of our first or second sound mix, and he suddenly stops in the middle and turns around to face us. I'm thinking, "uh oh, we're giving too many notes." That's when I notice he's freeze framed the Cleaners. He says "I really like these guys." Then he turns around, hits play and gets back to work.

PizzaHorse:

What was the biggest challenge for coming up with new stories and plot for the reboot?

Duane Capizzi:

THE biggest? Sigh. I'm not sure I could come up with just one. Plotting is always challenging and we had the brain trust of the room, our trusty white board, and writer assistant to keep the threads of the ongoing storyline together. I think the single biggest ONGOING challenge was tracking which character knew what at any given time.

The caper part was challenging - coming up with new capers and keeping them interesting and fresh. But, it was the characters and their interactions that kept things fresh and interesting. Another museum heist? That's okay - Chase is on the case and he gets to interact with "X" this time (for instance).

There were also some episodes - Duke of Vermeer and Crackle Goes Kiwi come to mind - where there was SO MUCH SET UP needed to get the payoffs to work. I was really worried about too much talk/too much detail. Very "Swiss watch!" It took a lot of work to make sure it all clicked and was clear - hopefully it seems effortless on screen but I can't say there wasn't some sweat and the occasional tear (mostly from me - I'm a big cry baby

But really, what made it fun was that we had so many buckets to draw from: sometimes a story germ initially began with a character idea; sometimes it was inspired by global location; sometimes it was a clever way to update or reimagine an idea from old Carmen lore. Usually, it was some combination of all of the above!

PizzaHorse:

What was your favorite scene to write?

Duane Capizzi:

I think we have a theme here! "How can I pick just one ...?"

As a film buff, I got to indulge in some serious fan nerdery on this show: I got to write spy movies, yakuza movies, spaghetti neo-westerns (though turning it on its head: spaghetti westerns usually involve REVENGE and because of Carmen's character make up, this was sort of anti-revenge).

Is writing coming up with the idea or typing it? Haha. An "if a tree falls in the forest" question. The writing team and I had so many cathartic "that's how it goes" in the room. But on my own, writing the Pilot, was a very inspiring time for me: I remember laughing out loud the moment I thought of Chase falling on his own car (in part because of doing my spin on "that trope" that we've seen in so many hard boiled movies recently). But also how emotional I got when I imagined the simple but potent image of Black Sheep deciding to take her destiny into her own hands and walk that long corridor to the Faculty who we were about to meet for the first time.

I think I've cited this in another interview, but there was a period where I was completely immersed in Chase's arc and the scene where he would crack the location of VILE island ... by listening to Julia in a dream ... was a big one for me. It revealed he was finally open to admitting he needed Julia more than he would ever admit - yet, it was his own subconscious speaking.

The next morning, after cracking that scene, I bumped into Raf Petardi (voice of Chase) ... at the supermarket! It was very strange and hilarious

PizzaHorse:

Did you scrap any lengthy or funny scenes that you would be able to share?

Duane Capizzi:

With few exceptions, most scene cuts are done at the script stage so that the story board team doesn't waste effort over boarding. A variety of trims to any script are common, but they are usually for the better

The easier question to answer might be scenes were part of our "wish list" at writer room stage, but never made it to story or script. I hesitate to go too deep here (in the event that we might ever do more Carmen episodes in this canon - I'm not giving up hope). And there were cases where things we wanted to do earlier in the series wound up getting nixed or not fitting for whatever reason, but we got them in later - USUALLY FOR THE BETTER. So there's sort of a reverse Murphy's Law/rule of good fortune somehow in these things. But some fun things that didn't make it into the show, that leap to mind were: a Bollywood dance sequence (!). A Vegas caper involving Brunt wanting to steal an Elvis jumpsuit against the backdrop of an Elvis impersonator convention. We also thought it would be neat to get Maelstrom imprisoned so that Julia could interrogate him and he would play mind games with her - very Lector/Clarice!

PizzaHorse:

Were there any different treatments of Carmen you pitched before settling on the one we ended up with?

Duane Capizzi:

I was one of several "pitches" that I'm sure HMH heard before running with my version. But I can honestly say I've never pitched anything as fully formed: the take on Carmen felt so right to me, and clearly HMH and by extension Netflix agreed

I'll answer your question with an anecdote: I had the entire Pilot pretty well worked out, and pitched it in the first meeting. But one key thing that changed (much for the better!), simply because it wouldn't have fit without slogging things down ...

In my Pilot pitch, Black Sheep's escape on the boat was off screen: we see Shadowsan corner her, then we cut away. The rest of the Faculty show up to find SS's broken sword on the rocks, and are led to believe BS killed him (!). In the present, Crackle points his weapon at Carmen and prepares to pull the trigger. We know that Chase is on the way and may rescue her. The compartment door opens to reveal - not Chase - but Shadowsan! Big surprise! Then we cut back to BS's escape and find out what really transpired etc etc.

Crazy, right? SS would have been hanging out with the gang in season 1; we might not have gotten to 203 with his back story, since his sword was broken and he couldn't return it. Just one of those magical things where "things work out" the way they are supposed to. THAT SAID, it made for a heckuva pitch

PizzaHorse:

Are there any characters that ended up taking a direction you didn't initially anticipate?

Duane Capizzi:

GRAY.

I didn't know we'd make him amnesiac when I wrote the Pilot, that was something we came up with in our first week Writer Room.

And even then, when it became clear he'd be a key piece of the bigger puzzle, we didn't know how exactly (mostly the Season 4 stuff).

We did get very deep with a version where 404 ended with his protective streak for Carmen kicking into high gear, and they would be fighting off Vile Guards back to back in perfect tandem. Then, having chosen Carmen over VILE, it was Carmen who actually orchestrates Gray going "off grid" so that VILE can never find him again. Funny, I know that is arguably the version of Gray's arc that many fans might have preferred seeing. But in the tradition of spy thrillers and film noir, and for a lone wolf character like Carmen who is focused on her life mission and not romance, we stand behind where we went with him. We felt it was so much more compelling ... and truly more emotional that he totally has a get out of jail free card when he sacrifices everything (including his life, potentially) to save Carmen.

when she needs him most!

I know I made some controversial comments about Gray "not being good enough for Carmen" and I'd like to clarify that I meant, until that final episode. What he did was so selfless and heroic. Is there hope for them in the future? Who knows?! But I do hope we get to explore that one day

I'm sure Gray is living off the grid somewhere now, inspired by Carmen's selfless good and thinking of her from time to time.

PizzaHorse:

You mentioned in the interview with Alicyn that Carmen is a love story, but you were cut off before you could finish discussing. Could you elaborate on your answer now?

Duane Capizzi:

Ugh, yes! Sorry about that. I actually answered that privately for someone so will cut and paste that response here. Let's see if it works.

Something we never said in the show, but something I imparted to the creative team was: Carmen Sandiego is (among other things) a LOVE STORY, where every character in our ensemble is in love with Carmen in one way or another. Even if they don't know it! That love can take different forms: we see how spurned by Carmen Coach Brunt feels and why she retaliates so excessively. Chase eventually comes to realize that he too loves Carmen, even if he wasn't initially aware of it haha. One of the most moving things to me about the series is how all of the different factions come to Carmen's rescue at the end when she's not "in her right mind," without knowing the others are there too. It's a massive group effort to bring back the Carmen they love. But we weren't looking for a fairy tale ending for Carmen with ANYone - Carmen's a classic lone wolf anti-hero, that goes with the territory. At least at this stage in her journey.

PizzaHorse:

Were there other locations that you wanted to feature in the show that didn't make it?

Duane Capizzi:

I think we managed to cover a lot of ground and "cadence" between different countries/cultures/continents was important to us. Many "iconic" locations of course, and it would have been nice to explore some lesser known locations if we had more episodes.

One that we almost did was Niagara Falls, Canada - actually literally going to the Falls and doing a big hydro-electric caper, where Player could actually get into the field with Carmen and the team.

But ultimately, we wound up bringing Player into the fold the way we did and wound up stronger as a result. It made his "first face to face" with Carmen even more impactful, IMO.

PizzaHorse:

Were there any changes in production between the first half and the second half of the series?

Duane Capizzi:

Well, there was that Covid thing

But while it was no doubt a colossal undertaking to get the entire staff transitioned to work from home (animators! and their equipment!), we managed to make up for lost time WITHOUT a dip in animation quality. My fedora's off to our amazing team at Wildbrain for pulling it off!

We did lose some staff between orders, but that is a natural part of production unfortunately. Namely, one of our episodic directors Kenny Park, our first storyboard artist Dennis Crawford, and our story editor May Chan were among those who moved on to other shows during the break. But, as hard as their shoes were to fill, fill them we did!

PizzaHorse:

What is your favorite season?

Duane Capizzi:

Easy. Hands down, Season 3.

(crickets)

KIDDING!

Again, another "they're all my babies" answer (and yes, I love Season 3 equally

It's hard, because really when you step back I'm sure you'll agree it's a series, with stand alone capers; but it's really all ONE BIG MOVIE.

Season 3 is like the scherzo of a symphony: the shortest movement of four, and the one that tees up the big finale.

That's my hoity toity answer but I'm going to put to rest all of the various theories on what happened with season 3. It was a combination of two things: Netflix's desire to experiment with different ways of "dropping" seasons, and their desire to do a holiday themed drop (in this case Halloween, naturally). It became our challenge to come up with a theme (easy enough: masks), and the bigger challenge to serve their need while not interrupting our ongoing narrative. A challenge to be sure, but a challenge met. I think the biggest bump was perception: it was a short season and I know that was disappointing to many. But, by design.

So, Season 3 = an essential part of the whole. I don't think there's a wasted episode, and it gets everyone into position for the big finish. I can't pick a favorite season - you can't make me

PizzaHorse:

Were there any characters you had wanted to give more time to but couldn't due to time/plot restraints?

Duane Capizzi:

Well, there's the "what was on the white board" answer but hopefully some of those ideas will see the light of day in some way, shape or form some day. I think if we had more episodes, we would have shaken up the internal dynamic of VILE a bit more (as hinted at Brunt's displeasure with Maelstrom for leaving her hanging out to dry at end of 405 - a seed we planted "just in case," as some have noted). And we had more scenes in mind with Chase's partnering with Carmen for the first time that we had to cut to the bone because of what little room we had in that otherwise packed episode (worry not: it's mostly more gags, more embellishment, more twists and turns - but the important stuff is there). Mostly, and I don't think it would have been right for Season 4 but I hope to tell in the future, I think there's an interesting history between Shadowsan and Lady Dokuso - possibly tragic - that I would love to explore one day. (She was a cameo in Duke of Vermeer at the dinner party BTW, I'm not sure if anyone noticed. And we built a bigger role for her out of that)

PizzaHorse:

What are some pre-2000/nostalgic Carmen references you snuck into the show? Do you have a favorite reference that was included?

Duane Capizzi:

Doing that was so much fun! I'd say roughly 60% of the characters were from previous iterations of Carmen, though often in name only. We had fun reimagining most everyone to make them more relevant or updated or giving them a more colorful personality for starters.

"Suhara" was Carmen's Japanese mentor when she worked at the ACME Agency in a flashback episode in the 90's series, for instance. I don't think I need to spell out how we turned that one inside out

And Tigress was also one episode only: she was a "rival thief" to Carmen, but revealed to be an ACME agent in disguise - a persona created solely to bait Carmen. It was really cool of course, but it seemed like untapped potential so we made her an ACTUAL Vile Thief.

My own internal rule was to make sure the references/easter eggs wouldn't confuse anyone - they were there for those who were in the loop and window dressing. The one and only time i broke that rule was Dark Carmen's line from 407: "I do it for the mental gymnastics." It was one of the most absurd lines from the 90's series (IMO) and i was determined to have it come out of Dark Carmen's mouth. I'm sure it left some 7 year olds scratching their heads

aside from that, the key references were the music: I still tingle at how we worked the Rockapella theme into the Interactive Special; and the 90's main title theme (composed by Mozart!), in our Vienna episode ("They're playing my song"). If you wanted Rockapella or Carmen as a bad guy, well ... be careful what you wish for!

PizzaHorse:

Was there any improvised content from recording sessions that made it into any episodes?

Duane Capizzi:

Yes! Not much, because a lot of it would have pushed us into TV-MA haha

Mostly Mary Elizabeth - Coach Brunt has a POTTY MOUTH!

Mikey and Abby usually riffed their banter WAY beyond what was on the written page and had us in stitches. Some bits definitely made it in! But mostly there was too much or it would get off point (hmmm, much like my interview answers maybe? haha)

Sharon Muthu did rise to Pun Goddess status with "Mask and you shall receive." And Raf pitched me "Chasse means hunt in French" after one session and I said: "I'm going to write that in." I don't think he believed me. You can't say I'm not a straight shooter.

PizzaHorse:

If you could get more season, would you do it, and what type of story would you tell?

Duane Capizzi:

Well if that hasn't been clear so far, ABSOLUTELY

There have been discussions of course. It's up to the powers that be at this point. I will say this: the beauty and tradition so far has been that every iteration has been its own thing. I definitely think there are more "different canon" versions of Carmen that can be had and be a part of this wonderful tradition. After all, there were many naysayers for our version when it was first announced.

I will also say that if we don't get to tell any more stories in this canon with these characters, we've left a perfect gem that will stand the test of time. I would rather go out on a high note than overstay our welcome.

All that said, we worked within the allotted episodes given, ended it as we wished, but left the door open for other stories. I'd love to do an expansion and a deepening: pick up where we left off; find out what happened in those two years; and proceed to do the equivalent of Godfather II or Better Call Saul as related to the amazing originals they followed.

Let's hope! Keep putting good vibes out there!

PizzaHorse:

If you could pick a character on Carmen Sandiego who'd you switch places with for a day (you get to control their life and they get to control yours) who would you pick, and why?

Duane Capizzi:

Okay, THIS is difficult. So you're going Freaky Friday on me?

on a Sunday?

Hmmm, I know Ivy would get along with my cat ... but then I'd have to hang out with Zack!

That's the trick: I can't pick my favorites cuz I couldn't hang out with them!

(not that I have favorites - they're all my babies haha)

Okay, I have one: ROUNDABOUT. I could fill Shadowsan's seat - how cool is that? Then, I could enact all my evil fantasies - but still have a get out of jail free card cuz he'd be sitting at my desk!

(cut to Duane being brain wiped - D'oh!)

PizzaHorse:

Who are two characters who don't really interact in the show that you think could be good friends or work really well together?

Duane Capizzi:

Hmmmm. Okay, now I'm going to give you quick and sassy answers. Gray and Julia! They'd be so cute banding together to rescue captive Carmen (for instance). And they could also duke it out and maybe settle things between themselves re: shipping controversies instead of dragging me into it

PizzaHorse:

The FINAL QUESTION. Have you learned anything super impactful while working on the show?

Duane Capizzi:

Aside from Iceland's terrifically low crime rate?

I think I have learned to never underestimate how meaningful characters can be to fans. Social media has obviously brought us a lot closer to our fan base in more immediate ways: it's been really gratifying to hear/see/read feedback and not be writing things in a vacuum. It's been gratifying to see that ideas that were meaningful to myself and the creative team on Carmen that were crafted with care, have also resonated with our fan base. THANK YOU TO EVERYONE who has traveled on this journey with us - for embracing Carmen's world view, and her friends and foes alike. Take care everyone! Stay safe! This has been fun, thanks for having me!

PizzaHorse:

HUGE thank you to Duane Capizzi: for being here today.

Thank you everyone for watching and reacting!

Duane Capizzi:

Okay, gotta run - just gotta find the door

Anyway, really: THIS HAS BEEN AMAZING. I speak for everyone involved in the creation and production of Carmen: it has been an amazing and inspiring series and we're elated to see it connect with such a CREATIVE, TALENTED and INTELLIGENT fan base. Take care everyone! Until next crime...

[moral-turpitudes]

Mending Hearts:

Trigger Warnings: Angst, Blood, Mentions/Descriptions of War and PTSD, Lil bit of Fluff and stuff.

Word Count: 3,296

Characters: Arthur Shelby x Reader

+ Ada, John, Finn, and Polly.

Request: (I got this super detailed request on my Wattpad: @jetblackheartsx but I loved it so much I wanted to post it on here :) For the sake of this one, it’s taking place around the first season-ish where Billy Kimber has become the Peaky Blinders’ current headache.

Paraphrased: “...Reader is new to Small Heath and makes friends with Ada. One day she invites reader to come to one of her brothers mansions. As they drive out there she tells reader about her family, and upon arrival they find blood and two men around the corner. They check to see if they’re alive and Ada calls an ambulance while reader figures out how to save them. After she manages to save them, the ambulance crew arrives and takes them to the hospital and the reader brings Ada home. The next day Ada and Arthur come to thank her and bring her flowers. Then Arthur asks the reader if she’d like to come for dinner one night to meet the rest of the Shelby family. Reader blushes and agrees to meet them after a couple days in order for them to recuperate. When there, she meets Finn who is sweet and charming, and then she’s led to the drawing room of the mansion where she meets Polly and John. And as typical Shelby’s they are a bit flirtatious and so as she sits down with them she wonders what on earth the future could hold.” 

Requested by: Wattpad Reader

Y/n walked out of her apartment ready to meet her new friend Ada and her family. She had just moved to Small Heath a week prior and it wasn’t long before she’d gotten herself in a rut. She had just been rejected from a seamstress job, roaming the dark colored town and heading towards the Garrison to drink away her current feelings. When she arrived, she saw a brunette standing at the bar with a disgruntled look on her face. She smiled and walked towards her, not paying any mind to the ogling stares from the groups of men drunkenly hanging around during the day.

“What will you have miss?” The bartender asked.

“Oh, just a bottle of whiskey....thank you.” She said as he handed her a shot glass and a bottle. She slipped him the cash and he smiled as he went to tend to the other customers.

“You don’t sound like you’re from here...what’s your name?” Ada asked, staring at her glass of wine as Y/n took a seat.

“Y/n...and you’re right...I’m not from here. Just moved from London.” She said.

“Well...welcome to Small Heath then, Y/n. I’m Ada...Ada Shelby.” She said hesitantly.

“What brings you here?” She asked.

“Planning to drink away my sadness for the night, it’s lonely here. Job rejections and such...” Y/n said before taking a shot.

“I see...well I may be able to help you out with that if you’d like. I have some pull in this town.” Ada said winking.

“Really? You’d help me out? You barely know me.” She said taking another shot.

“I know...I just want to help for a change. You seem nice so I’m willing to take the chance. And....let’s just say my family is always looking for ways to expand their business. What do you do exactly?” She asked.

“Well I was a nurse back in London for a couple years, but then I got sent out to help in the war, stitching soldiers, mending wounds, repairing uniforms, things like that.” She said nonchalantly. She never opened up much about her experience, seeing wounded soldiers everyday, but she managed to integrate back into civilian life just fine, but it was the nights when she’d sit at home alone that worried her the most.

“Oh really? All of my brothers except for my youngest got sent to France...I’m glad they and you got back. It’s changed them though...” She said sipping her wine.

“War does that, yeah.” Y/n said looking down at her third shot. Remembering all the men she saw and helped mend.

“Are you wanting to drink that whole thing?” Ada asked smirking.

“Only if you‘d want to help me.” She said, pushing the bottle towards Ada.

They continued on like that for the day, becoming best friends by the end of the night.

“You...you’d like my brothers. Maybe I’ll let you meet them tomorrow?” She asked, slurring her words a bit. Y/n could see the poor woman was desperate for some kind of human interaction that wasn’t with her family, so she smiled, agreeing to meet them and looking forward to hanging out with her again.

“I’ll pick you up at noon tomorrow. What’s your address?” Ada asked.

Y/n wrote it down quickly, hoping it was legible in her current state.

“I’ll have my driver take you back, here come with me.” She said taking her arm as they both hobbled out. She paid no mind to the men whistling at them as they walked to the car.

Once in, Y/n looked around hazily and drunkenly talked with Ada as they both watched the dreary night blow by them as the driver made his way to her apartment, Ada only slightly more sober than her, helping her to her door.

“Noon tomorrow alright? Thanks for keeping me company tonight. You’re a good friend Y/n.” She said before giving Y/n a hug. Y/n smiled and waved her off, quickly going inside and heading for her scarcely furnished bedroom.

During the war she learned to live with next to nothing, as she constantly had to share stuff with her nurse mates and only had a few clothing items She could bring. Necessities were pretty much it for her, keeping her style in both clothing and furnishings to a minimum.

The next day, Y/n awoke with an all-too-familiar headache and so she took a quick shower and put on a white dress-shirt and beige skirt. Tying her hair up into a tight bun with a ribbon and some pins, just as she did years ago. It had to be done so often that she did it out of habit now.

Grabbing her coat, she walked out, seeing Ada parked outside.

“Hey Y/n! Nice to see you! How are you feeling?” She asked, her sunglasses hiding her own tired look.

“Hungover, but I’ve been through worse.” She said smirking. Ada laughed and continued on, driving down the road.

“So tell me about this family of yours? They have a business I may be of use to you said?” Y/n asked.

Ada gulped and smiled, trying to hide the uneasiness in her voice as she spoke.

“Well, they’re pretty well known here as am I. The Shelbys that is....my brothers mainly...are known as the Peaky Blinders...rigging the books, going to horse races, taking bets, smuggling drugs, weapons, the lot...” Ada paused, waiting for y/n’s reaction.

“Oh my...You know I think I’ve heard of them before, they got in quite the scuffle in London about a year ago.” Y/n said.

“Does that scare you? What my family does?” She asked, knowing many of her friends left her due to her status.

“Not really. They sound quite interesting. That or I’m insane...” Y/n said jokingly.

“Well Y/n you might be. But in that case I think you’ll fit right in.” She said.

“I don’t mean to barge in or anything though, to their business that is, I don’t want to seem desperate for a job...” Y/n said, fiddling nervously with her hands as they pulled into her brother Thomas’ driveway.

“They don’t mind. I’ve already talked with them. Tommy needs a new nurse and a seamstress if I’m honest. The bastard gets in dangerous fights and rips holes in almost all his suits at some point. Not to mention, the old nurse almost gave him an overdose of morphine once because she couldn’t see the dosage markers.” She said chuckling.

“Oh my. Well I’d be glad to help, thanks for putting a word in for me.” Y/n said before getting out of Ada’s car.

“No problem.” She said smiling and leading her into Thomas’ estate.

As they walked along the hallway, Y/n saw a trail of blood and Ada gasped.

“Walk to the side of it.” Y/n said sternly, walking down the long hall and towards the kitchen. The blood was fresh and a dark crimson, the light glinting off it as it led down into the cellar.

Groaning was heard from two dark haired men. Ada suddenly screamed and ran away from her to call an ambulance.

“Hello! Yes come to Thomas Shelby’s estate quickly. He’s been hurt again and so has Arthur.” Y/n heard her say urgently from upstairs.

Without thinking, Y/n carefully dodged the blood and ran towards them, seeing the man with blue eyes drifting in and out.

“Hey, stay with me. Focus on my voice. I’m going to put pressure on your abdomen okay?” He nodded and looked at her from bloodied eyes, he’d been beaten and stabbed badly.

“What’s your name aye?” Y/n asked as he winced.

“Thomas...Thomas Shelby.” He said quietly.

“Ada get me a first aid kit! Now!” She yelled from the cellar loudly, causing the other man to cover his ears as he bled from his arm profusely.

Ada came running down, a look of fear and disgust as she got blood on her heels.

“Here, I found some whiskey, a needle and thread, and some pliers. Oh and the former nurses morphine.” She said handing her the box with all of it and the bottle of whiskey.

“Ada I know you don’t want to do this but I’m going to need you to wrap your brothers arm in gauze and squeeze it. Talk to him. Don’t let him fade out.” Y/n ordered. Ada shakily went over to her brother Arthur and did as instructed.

“Oi! Ada who’s that?” He asked, panting as he held his hand over his stomach which was also bleeding.

“Sh-she’s my new friend, the one I told you about. I figured she’d be able to be of some use.” She said sloppily wrapping the gauze and squeezing his arm as he yelled out.

“Thomas? Hey. Hey! No don’t look up look at me.” Y/n said shaking her head a bit as she looked on the syringe and loaded the correct amount of morphine into it, administering it carefully into his arm. She could feel his eyes on her as she poured whiskey in the wound. His eyes opened wide and he bit his lip trying not to scream as she worked.

“A piece of the knife broke off and I have to extract it, bite down on this.” She said, putting his loose tie in his mouth.

She cleaned her hands with whiskey and then carefully extracted the piece of metal from his wound, causing it to bleed more. Then she quickly threaded the needle and put pressure on him to stop the bleeding before stitching him up just as she was instructed in the medical ward.

It seemed as if it took her forever but really it only took her about 10 minutes.

Ada gagged as she held the now saturated gauze, watching Y/n put the final touches on Tommy’s gauze before wiping the blood from his face and putting ointment on the cuts near his eye.

Thomas watched her as she ran towards Arthur who was losing blood more quickly. She didn’t think, just acted, as she undid Arthur’s belt causing Ada to give her a questioning look.

“Tourniquet.” She said sharply before yanking the remainder of it from under him.

“You did great Ada. Put his tie in his mouth now please.“ Y/n said, and Ada did as instructed.

“So I hear your names Arthur. Keep your eyes on me. I’m going to tie this alright? Bite down.” Y/n said as he weakly bit down.

He groaned and she saw tears escape his eyes as he looked at her, frantic and nervous as he was losing blood rapidly.

Y/n averted her gaze and pulled the belt as tight as she could, getting the bleeding under control gradually as she assessed his wounds.

He was stabbed like Tommy but not as deeply and not with a piece of metal embedded in his side, as his arm was what took the brunt of it.

Y/n unwrapped the gauze and flushed both wounds out as he yelled through the tie. Ada walked over to Tommy after she saw Y/n had Arthur under control and asked him about what happened, Y/n listening in as she worked.

“Kimber’s men...they came in here after we got back from the races. It was just me and Arthur here as we were going to go to the shop. They came here to get me Ada. They came here to kill me after what went down.” He said weakly.

“Well they failed miserably.” Ada said half smiling. Tommy took his sisters hand and held it as she watched Y/n work, waiting for the ambulance.

Y/n got the bleeding in his arm to fully stop for now and so she administered another correct dose of morphine and then stitched Arthur’s arm up and wrapped it, doing the same to the wound on his stomach, blushing a bit as his eyes caught hers as she shyly checked him out, his abs prominent as he tensed up from the pain.

As Y/n finished cleaning him up, he looked up at her and smiled weakly.

“Where did you learn all this? You’re a way better nurse than that old hag... isn’t she Tommy?” He said looking over at him. Tommy’s blue eyes darted over to him as he nodded, he itched to get back to business, to hunt down Kimber’s men, but he knew he couldn’t right now, no matter how much he wanted to.

“I uh...was sent off to France during the war. I helped take care of the soldiers.” She said hesitantly, remembering one of the nights when she had to rush into the field and help one of the men near the tunnels. He had the shakes and was doubled over in pain from the heat and an injury he had came into the infirmary for a few days prior.

Her heart raced as she remembered trying to help him out of the tunnel as a bomb went off near one of the trenches they were stumbling towards, killing the other soldiers near them instantly. The dirt, debris, and blood of her fellow nurses and soldiers raining down on her as she hit the ground, her ears ringing for what felt like forever as the man helped her hide despite his shaky and weakened state. He had brought her down near a dirt hole that was much less deep compared to the other trenches, urging her to hide as he looked around for more bombs. She tried her best to help him when he came back, giving him her canteen and helping him cool off as they hid. But he later died in front of her as he succumbed to the shock and from sepsis due to the injury he had gotten.

She sat there with tears in her eyes, snapping back to reality at Arthur’s voice as she remembered hiding with the mans corpse until sunrise.

“Y/n are you alright?” He asked. He must’ve said something before but she hadn’t heard him due to her flashing back to that night.

“Oh! Right, sorry. I just have memories...I’m sure you both know what that’s like...” She said, as he nodded and took her hand. She wiped her tears away as she heard the ambulance blaring in the distance and immediately went to help Tommy and Arthur up and out of the cellar, desperately shoving the memories away to focus.

After they’re swept off to the hospital, Y/n looked as Ada watched them leave, leaving her to clean up the mess scattered through Tommy’s house.

“Here I can help Ada. I’m great with washing blood out of things.” Y/n said smirking.

“You have a morbid sense of humor, truly.” Ada said as they both worked their way down to the cellar, cleaning every inch of the flooring with mops, soap, a pail of water, and some bleach.

When all was done, it was around 5pm, and Y/n could tell Ada was tired. Y/n was used to the stress and violence keeping her going, but Ada on the other hand was worried and exhausted.

“Here I’ll take you home. I’ll drive and then walk home.” She said.

“Oh no I’ll have a driver come pick you up, no friend of mine will be walking alone.” She said.

“Alright, well I’ll still drive you home though, no use tiring yourself more than you already are.” She said patting Ada on the back as she grabbed the keys.

“I guess. Just don’t speed too much.” She said jokingly.

“No promises.” Y/n said and then got in the car, driving off to Ada’s lavish apartment.

By the time they got there, a car was waiting for her and so she said her goodbyes and received a million thanks from Ada, and then tiredly got in the car and headed home, watching the lavish building fade into the night.

The next day she awoke to a loud knock on her door, and so she sprung up and slipped on a robe as her hair fell down around her shoulders. She sighed as she took in her tired appearance, but nevertheless walked to the door.

She was greeted with a tall man hiding behind a bright bouquet of flowers and a smiling Ada.

“Put the flowers down you doofus. She can’t see your face.” She said before forcing him to give Y/n the flowers. Once she placed them inside, she saw it was Arthur.

“Oi, hiya Y/n. We just wanted to say thank you. You uh saved my brother and I‘s lives back there and I wanted to tell you in person.” He said as he looked at his fresh bandage on his arm.

Y/n blushed as she glanced at him and the flowers.

“It was no problem really.” She said looking at him again as she blushed slightly.

“I know you’ve been through a lot, but would you like to come over to meet the rest of the family for dinner in a couple days? They’re keeping Tommy over In the hospital for a day or two so that they can get some things sorted and make sure he doesn’t run out like he did in the past.” He said smirking to Ada who rolled her eyes at the memory.

“Sure! I’d love to meet my new colleagues and....patients...should the need arise.” She said.

“Alright I’ll see you at Thomas’ estate then.”

“Sounds like a plan. Ada will you be there?” Y/n asked.

“Of course! I’ll pick you up at noon.” She said.

“Alright, see you both very soon.” Y/n said before closing the door, blushing like a madwoman as she took in what just happened. She smelled the flowers before bringing them to her table near the window, finally having a bit of color to brighten up the place.

A few days had passed and she got ready in her long green dress, putting her hair up as she looked in the mirror. She added makeup and then heard Ada’s car as if on cue.

She quickly pulled on her coat and dashed out the door, excited to meet the rest of the notorious Shelby family.

Upon entering, Ada introduced Y/n to her youngest brother Finn, who politely greeted her and directed her to the others.

They were all in the drawing room, discussing what happened when Ada and Y/n walked in.

“There she is! The woman of the hour!” Arthur said excitedly, pointing at Y/n, causing her to blush.

Polly and their other brother John came over and hugged her. Polly telling her how grateful they are for Y/n being their new nurse, and John eyeing her up and down and winking as she walked past him, advancing towards Arthur to give him a hug. John frowned, wondering why she’d go for someone that wasn’t him, but he soon sat back down, wiping the expression off his face when Polly came near.

“How are you doing Tommy?” Y/n asked making her way over to him, patting him lightly on the shoulder.

He put his hand over hers and looked up at her smiling slightly.

“I’m doing better. Thanks to you of course.” He said and she smiled.

“Hey I was there too you know!” Ada said slumping down in her seat by John and Polly.

“You did great too, holding my arm and all Ada. But nothing beats a badass military nurse aye?” Arthur asked winking at Y/n as he raised his glass.

“I’ll drink to that.” Y/n said, smiling and raising her glass at him as she took in her new friends and colleagues.

She never thought she’d end up here but she knew it was where she was meant to be. Coming from nothing in London, to finding some semblance of a normal life in Small Heath, eager to leave some parts of the past behind but reluctant to let go of others. She knew that this was better than where she had been before. And that despite her brief flirtatious interactions with the tall, short-haired man, she couldn’t shake the feeling that maybe he wanted something more, and that maybe it was fate that she’d moved here after all, but only time can tell.

Tag List:

@flysafepapi, @inglourious-imagines, @peakysabrina, @blinder-secrets, @ta-ka-shi-ma

[arsonistslut]

Suddenly...Liu woke up. His face didn't feel like it was burning anymore, and the sunshine that flowed into his room was starkly different from the darkness of the room he was just attacked in. It wasn't just that, though, everything around him seemed to be in a sort of dreamy haze. He was about to stand when his brother burst in the room. Liu nearly jumped out of his skin, quickly realizing that the scars that riddled Jeff's body before were totally gone. Was everything from before just a dream?

"Wake up, bro! You're gonna be late for school!"

All he could do was just stare at Jeff, confusion riddling his face.

"You alright, man?"

"..Y-Yeah, I'm fine!"

Liu rushed out of his bed and began preparing for school as his brother waited downstairs, rushing down as well once he was ready and walking into the kitchen, expecting the same wordless room where his parents usually were in the morning. Carla looked over at her son and smiled as she ruffled his hair.

"Good morning, you two!"

"Mornin' mama!"

Liu thought something was deeply wrong. His brother was never this jovial, and their parents barely ever talked to them in the slightest, and that was for 15 years! Was..was that all a bad dream? Was all that Sully shit a bad dream, was Jeff getting set on fire a bad dream? When him and his brother got to the school bus, Jeff sat next to one of the other kids, and Natalie sat next to Liu.

"Hi, handsome!~"

"Hey, Nat! How are you?"

Liu was thankful that at least she didn't change.

"I'm doing really well, my dad's recently gotten arrested, so now I'm living with my grandma, she's a sweetheart!"

"O-Oh, that's great!"

"Hey, did you hear about Jeff's new girlfriend?"

"No, he never told me! What's her name?"

"Cassie! I'm gonna be honest, those two are the cutest. They're such sweethearts, they're practically made for each other!"

"That's wonderful!"

Liu then looked outside the window..he couldn't help but wonder how he'd just realized this, but it was such a beautiful day outside! The birds were singing, the flowers were blooming, days like this came practically once every century in New Orleans. Maybe everything from before really was just a bad dream.

A delighted giggle came from Sully as he watched Liu go about his day in the world he'd so carefully crafted for him in his head.

"Finally safe..safe from the horrors that would taint your pure soul."

Nina boredly flipped through the late night channels, sighing as she wasn't able to find anything that interested her. It was far past her bedtime, and her eyelids were getting heavy, so when a particularly eye-catching news report showed up, it grabbed her attention right away.

"And now, we turn to New Orleans, which has been the site of a brutal massacre tonight, as 7 people have been recently found brutally murdered over the course of an hour. Police are not releasing any names of the victims, but they have apprehended a suspect who they believe is the killer, 17 year old Jeffrey Woods was recently arrested after having set the house of Bruce and Aurora Arkansas on fire. The lone survivors of this horrible night are reportedly one individual, along with the daughter of Bruce and Aurora. Liu Woods, Jeffrey's brother, has gone missing, if you have any information regarding where he may be, please contact the police. We do have footage of Jeffrey's arrest, but be warned, it may disturb some viewers."

The TV then showed footage of a group of police officers surround a pale teenager, his whole body caked in blood. Jeffrey shrugged and laid his knife down on the ground, placing his hands behind his head and allowing the police to arrest him. As he was led to the back of a cruiser, Jeff looked into the camera.

"You win some, you lose some, I guess."

The TV then cut back to the clearly shaken reporter.

"We'll provide more information as it comes to us. IN other news.."

Nina shut her TV off, a wide smile growing on her face. She couldn't quite place her finger on it, but she related to Jeff. What was keeping someone like her from going on a rampage like that...? Snatching her laptop off her desk, Nina quickly logged onto 4-Chan and started a thread. She pondered over what to call it, then typed in an adequate name.

"Jeff's Killers."

Chapter 19: "Nothing but pure evil"

"Jeffrey..do you feel even the slightest bit of guilt for your actions?"

Woods had shown no shame throughout his trial. No guilt or remorse for his actions. He sure as shit wanted to, but when the judge asked him that question, he couldn't restrain the smile that came to his face as he remembered how good it felt to plunge his knife into his father's head, how good it felt to snap Troy's neck, how good it felt to drop that match. Besides, wasn't Zalgo right? This was going to keep happening until he died.

"I don't. They all deserved what they got. Besides, I didn't have any other choice."

Silence followed his words. Some gasped, some began to sob, some just laughed in amazement, but most of the courthouse was silent.

"Jeffrey Woods..you are nothing but pure evil. This court finds you guilty of all charges, and sentences you to death."

The judge forced back tears and pointed toward the door.

"Get him out of here.."

Woods was led away by a pair of policemen, and the courtroom cheered as he was led away.

"And then, my sentence got reduced to life in prison, and now..here we are, doctor."

"I see.."

Dr. Oborn wrote down more notes in his clipboard, before looking back up at his patient.

"Doc..can I ask you a question?"

"Of course, Jeffrey."

"...Was that judge right? A-Am I just..evil?"

"While murder is a horrific crime, and many people do seem to see you as nothing more than a psycho who killed for fun, I've spoken with you for over a year now, and I don't believe you to be evil. After what you've told me, I now know that your condition was likely caused by the trauma you referred to earlier."

"..Doc, I.."

Jeff let out a burst of relieved laughter, almost tearing up from joy at the doctor's words.

"You h-have no fuckin' clue how much that means to me! I..I thought I was a lost cause for the longest time..I-I mean, people don't feel happy when they kill someone, y'know?"

"You're not a lost cause, by any means. We've made incredible progress today, and I believe that you will be able to comfortably integrate back into society soon enough. Although, I am confused by one thing."

"What?"

"..How did you know about the things that happened after your hospitalization?"

"Zalgo showed me."

"Zalgo? Who is that?"

"Zalgo is the reason I believe in the afterlife. Apparently, it's a medical miracle I even survived the incident at the party, let alone heal so quickly that my body's now one big lump of scar tissue. Zalgo helped me to survive."

"This is the first time you've mentioned this.."

"Demon."

"Demon to me. You have previously stated your beliefs in Leveyan Satanism, so is this a sort of..representation of the devil?"

"No, the devil isn't real. Zalgo is. Look, can we t-talk about something else?"

Dr. Oborn placed one of his hands on Jeffrey's shoulder, growing concerned due to his growing..worry, almost.

"Is everything alright, son?"

"I...didn't get a lot of sleep last night."

"Nightmares, again?"

"No, I saw things, doctor..I've seen how this world will end."

"You've seen the apocalypse, you say?"

Jeffrey then just shook his head, something he feared he would do suddenly worming it's way into his brain unannounced.

"Jeff..are you having intrusive thoughts?"

"I..I don't want to hurt you, you don't deserve it.."

"Nothing will happen to me, son. I'll be just fine!"

"You..you sure?"

"I'm positive."

"Thank you, doctor.."

"Of course-"

Dr. Oborn was pleasantly surprised when Jeff reached across the table and hugged him, but didn't hesitate in hugging his patient back.

Chapter 20: A new terror

"Listen, man, I know what I saw! Some lanky motherfucker was running around my backyard, and wearing a white hoodie! They didn't catch Jeff The Killer, he's still fucking running-"

Carlos Kennedy changed the channel of his radio, confused as to how someone could genuinely believe that it was a good idea to log onto a radio show, ramble about how you believed a convicted killer was still able to run around your backyard, and think you'll be taken seriously. His attention to that was quickly interrupted by seeing a person lying near the road, face down. The good Samaritan quickly stopped his car and got out, rushing over to the seemingly unconscious person that was lying in a ditch.

"Hello?! A-Are you-"

A knife to Carlos's throat quickly cut him off, blood spraying out of his wound. The girl who stabbed him lifted his corpse off the decoy, a teenager in a white hoodie and a somewhat poorly made, but nonetheless effectively scary Jeff The Killer mask.

"Good work, Jethro."

"All I did was sit here, but thanks, Nina."

This was the first recorded murder committed by Jeff's Killers, after a year of just being a bunch of teenagers hanging out in an abandoned house where a bunch of patricide took place.