#wtaf that song is HOW OLD???

[albumbirthdays]

happy birthday baby you're a haunted house! (october 26, 2018)

[nmakii]

‘Can I ask you to do something about Alastor×reader? About y/n being a modern girl (2023-2024), and she often has strange gestures or words towards Alastor. One time she talked to him in modern language, making him confused and very curious. (You can expand the situation as you like, sorry my English is not very good)’

NEW IS ALWAYS BETTER!

— alastor x modern!reader (platonic or romantic!)

— alastor calls reader “good girl” so mostly fem!coded

— I WROTE THIS AND THEN IT GOT DELETED I MIGHT KMS.

alastor gets slangs that are common such as LOL, WTF, IDK but doesn’t get some that aren’t as common like LMFAO, IDRC, or WTAF since they’re just making them longer, so it’s quite useless…

he also doesn’t quite get shortcuts for words. one time you left him a note “lol brb rq imma b back in like 20 min. j gon pick smt up” most of it was honestly gibberish to him, but at the very least, he understood you’ll be back in 20 minutes.

gets really angry when you say things like “stop reaching, gooner. you’re just pissed that you’re a beta.” because; one, you’re blatantly disrespecting the radio demon and telling him to shut up. and two, he doesn’t get what any of that meant. what’s a gooner?

also gets annoyed often when you start singing songs like “i’m the alpha, i’m the leader” or “sticking out your gyatt for the rizzler” because, it’s a reflection on modern society and how music quality in modern times have plummeted significantly.

what happened to those beautiful songs such as “the man i love”? has it been replaced by this rizzler nonsense??? honestly, you’re giving alastor more and more reasons to dislike modernity… you’re lucky he finds your company enjoyable

in a desperate attempt to connect with you, he asked angel about your humor, hoping he’d understand. alastor knows that if anything, velvette would know. but, he’d rather get beaten by lucifer than ask the vees for help…

sadly for him, angel is just as confused. although, he at least knew what this alpha bullshit was, vaguely explaining furries and the alpha-beta-omegaverse to him…

you were in the hotel den, scrolling on social media as alastor walked in. “s/o, be a dear and fetch me some chicken breasts from the butcher, would you? i’d like to prepare something for tonight’s dinner.” alastor smiled

“hmm… nah. go do it yourself, furry” you giggled brattishly. “hahah… what did you call me?” alastor asked sternly, his face now close with yours, antlers increasing only slightly in size. “ah…” you stuttered.

alastor was never this mad when you said stuff like that, what was so different today? maybe he was in a bad mood? “ah… ill get it…” you conceded, using your hands to lightly push alastor away, lest he decides you’ll be for dinner…………

alastor snickered before patting you on the head. “good girl. don’t call me that again, this old dog can still learn new tricks, y’know?” he teasingly sang out. “huh?” you asked. “did you learn what a furry is?” you bit your lip, holding back your laughter.

“indeed, i did. horrifying that you’d think i would indulge in such hobbies…” he sighed, looking a little uncomfortable through his stressed smile. “what..? i don’t think you’re a furry, alastor. it’s not that deep. furry is just something that i used to laugh about with my friends back on earth.” you shallowly laughed, copying his actions by rubbing his hair.

he has to admit, that little mistranslation was a little funny looking back on it. but, he is a little disheartened that he got you scared over nothing. you were just having your fun and he got all pissed off. he’d definitely try to instead ask you about your slang as to prevent such a thing again…

[bbyjackie]

𝐒𝐎𝐂𝐈𝐀𝐋𝐒 𝐀𝐒... 𝐁𝐀𝐑𝐁𝐈𝐄 𝐖𝐈𝐓𝐇 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐒𝐓𝐑𝐀𝐖𝐇𝐀𝐓𝐒 — ♡

one piece social media feat: strawhats special appearance: whitebeard pirates, heart pirates, kid pirates

》 in honour of barbie!! (+ oppenheimer)

♡ liked by nefertari_vivi, ace and 10.4k others

_ynln: barbie girls in the new world 🎀💄

[music: Beauty And A Beat - Justin Bieber, Nicki Minaj ♫]

tagged: p1rateking_luffy, lovenami, theroronoa.zoro, nicorobin, nefertari_vivi, sogekingg.usopp, blackleg.sanji, jinbe, ilovecottoncandychopper, S0U1K1NGBR00K, FRAAANKY

FRAAANKY: LETS GOOOOOOOOO 🔥🔥

nefertari_vivi: so happy to meet up with you guys again!! 💕

↳ _ynln: we missed u!

↳ lovenami: lets do it again!

↳ blackleg.sanji: YOU WERE SO BEAUTIFUL VIVI 💞💘❣️💕🥰😍

lovenami: we look so good omg ‼️

ace: CAN'T BELIEVE WE RAN INTO EACHOTHER

↳ _ynln: EEE IM SO GLAD YOU JOINED US!!

↳ p1rateking_luffy: HEHE IT WAS SO FUNNY WHEN U FELL ASLEEP ACE 😂

sogekingg.usopp: BEST DRESSED CREW IN THE NEW WORLD

trafalgar_d.law: it looked like you all copied doflamingo's style

↳ _ynln: PLEASE DELETE THIS B4 HE SEES IT I DONT WANT TO DIE🙏🙏

↳ p1rateking_luffy: HEHAHHA TRA GUY YOURE RIGHT

↳ doflamingo_: Looking good @_ynln

↳ _ynln: you're old enough to be my dad 😐

↳ doflamingo_: Add a dy to that

↳ theroronoa.zoro: more like you should dy off 😭😭 (liked by trafalgar_d.law, _ynln, sogekingg.usopp)

CAPTAIN.KIIIID: fire song choice (liked by _ynln, theroronoa.zoro)

♡ liked by marco_o, iampops and 14.3k others

ace: ran into these losers 😪

tagged: _ynln, p1rateking_luffy

marco_o: so when you said you couldn't do cleaning duty, you were out watching barbie

↳ ace: And I'm bad like the Barbie (Barbie) I'm a doll, but I still wanna party (party) Pink 'Vette like I'm ready to bend (bend) I'm a ten, so I pull in a Ken

↳ marco_o: you need to be put down

_ynln: omg i made it on THE FIRE FIST ACE'S ig?! 🫢🫢

↳ ace: YOU WERE LITERALLY IN THE LAST PHOTO DUMP

↳ _ynln: NO WAY YOU POST ME IN THE SAME DUMP AS LUFFY AND EXPECT ME TO BE OKAY W THAT 🤨🤨

↳ ace: mb you're the no.1 fr 😌🤞

p1rateking_luffy: LERS DO A MOVIE NIGHT AGUIB WIEH SABU TOO

↳ saaaa_bo: real, if that's what you were trying to say

iampops: Sons, let's go watch barbie together

↳ ace: pops i ain't even gonna lie, there's no way we can bring you to the theatre and not have the marines after us 😭😭

↳ _ynln: ace YOU'RE the liability, i literally ran into the marines and they were offering me DOUBLE your bounty to turn you in

↳ lovenami: AND YOU DIDN'T DO IT?

♡ liked by nojiko.ko, blackleg.sanji and 6.9k others

lovenami: glad this fit is boutta be on my new bounty poster 🤞

tagged: p1rateking_luffy, _ynln, nicorobin, nefertari_vivi

_ynln: nami nahh 💀 we were running for our LIVES

↳ themarineofficial: my mum told me to chase after my dreams (liked by _ynln, FRAAANKY, theroronoa.zoro)

↳ sogekingg.usopp: WHO TF HACKED INTO THE OFFICIAL MARINE IG LMFAOO 😭😭

↳ lovenami: scariest notification

trafalgar_d.law: luffy? more like goofy. why's he trying to rizz up the camera man like that

p1rateking_luffy: Tra guy what does rizz mean

↳ trafalgar_d.law: RIZZ: Another word for spitting game/how good you are with pulling and sustaining bitches. [Urban Dictionary]

↳ p1rateking_luffy: I GOT THAT ILLEGAL RIZZ 🤪🤪😇🙏🔥🔥

↳ _ynln: LUFFY WHAT

↳ lovenami: ?!!

↳ jinbe: ?

↳ trafalgar_d.law: wtaf

↳ p1rateking_luffy: Ace told me to say it :((

↳ saaaa_bo: ACE STOP RUINING LUFFY'S DIGITAL FOOTPRINT

↳ ace: GUYS OMG DONT HATE ON ME TBF HE PULLED HANCOCK AND SHES LIKE 30

blackleg.sanji: MY BEAUTIFUL GODDESSES IN ONE FRAME HOW DID I EVER GET THIS LUCKY TO BE BORN INTO THIS LIFE 💓💖💘🧡💕💖💗❤️

↳ p1rateking_luffy: I'm in the photo too!

↳ blackleg.sanji: sadly.

↳ _ynln: 😭

♡ liked by sogekingg.usopp, BONBONBONCLAY and 12.7k others

p1rateking_luffy: Last nighT was fun

tagged: ace, theroronoa.zoro, _ynln, blackleg.sanji

ace: WHAT WERE YOU DOING TO ME?

↳ _ynln: dude you were GONE 😭

↳ p1rateking_luffy: HAAHGAHA DID YIUO SEE THE THINGFW WE DFEW ON YOURE FACE

↳ trafalgar_d.law: ever feel bad about yourself? think about luffy's spelling (liked by saaaa_bo)

lovenami: WHAT WERE YOU GUYS DOING TO YN AND ZORO IN THE SECOND PHOTO

↳ lovenami: WAIT WHEN WAS THE PHOTO EVEN TAKEN?

↳ p1rateking_luffy: Ryght after the marnjnes follqweod you g0uys instead

↳ sogekingg.usopp: aint no way i was fighting for life and these rats were having the time of their life 🫤🫤

↳ _ynln: 😝

↳ p1rateking_luffy: 😝

♡ liked by killerrr, SOU1K1NGBR00K and 10.1k others

_ynln: strawhats take on oppenheimer next 🖤

tagged: p1rateking_luffy, lovenami, theroronoa.zoro, nicorobin, nefertari_vivi, sogekingg.usopp, blackleg.sanji, jinbe, ilovecottoncandychopper, S0U1K1NGBR00K, FRAAANKY

themarinesofficial: strawhat ladies and roronoa zoro i will need to arrest you for stealing my heart ❤️

↳ _ynln: LMFAO UM IM CRYING??!!

↳ nicorobin: This is slightly uncomfortable

↳ CAPTAIN.KIIIID: LMFAO THE WAY ZORO IS INCLUDED AHHAA

↳ blackleg.sanji: BACK OFF FROM THEM 🫵

↳ theroronoa.zoro: just crucify me again

sogekingg.usopp: OKAY BUT FR WHO HACKED INTO THEIR ACC 😭😭

↳ FRAAANKY: nah people in the marines just getting bored fr

ace: YOOO LETS MEET UP (liked by _ynln)

↳ p1rateking_luffy: @saaaa_bo COME TOO

[marsdreamworld]

Electric Love - CL16 x reader

mars’ notes: First off, wtaf??? i’m so so so happy that you guys liked my lando blurb that much, i was half distracted and incredibly anxious when i wrote it, so the fact that so many people like it is absolutely insane to me jnfruncr - anyways, here’s a cute little (not so little) Charles fic i had bouncing around in my head :) thank you @love-belle for listening to me ramble!! please please lmk what you think, any and all feedback is greatly appreciated <333

summary: 4 times Charles almost told you he loved you, and the one time he did.

warnings: none!! super fluffy (again)

———————————————————-

The first time Charles almost let those three precious words slip from his lips was during an unassuming pasta date the two of you had planned. You had gone to the grocery store earlier in the day, and had remembered the old, silver unused pasta maker that was stashed in the back of yours and Charles’ kitchen cabinet, and decided that it seemed like a good day to finally teach your boyfriend how to properly cook the Italian staple. You’d come home in a flurry of excitement, bags dangling from your arms and a bright smile on your face, stating that you were going to teach him how to cook so well that he’d rival Yuki Tsunoda, teasing that maybe that way he’d be able to get Pierre over to his house for a dinner date as well. He’d smiled, grabbed the bags from your hands and set them down on the kitchen counter, before winding his arms around you and kissing you softly, telling you that he missed you and couldn’t wait.

You were too full of excitement to wait any longer, turning on the old radio in the corner of the kitchen, the sound of an old 1950s love song filling the space whilst Charles got two glasses and a bottle of red wine from the rack in the living room. Once your glasses were full and your hands had been washed, you’d dragged him over to the kitchen counter and thrust a “kiss the cook” apron into his hands, instructing him to put it on so he wouldn’t get flour all over himself. He’d asked whether you had a matching one, to which you replied that you’d done this far too many times to spill any flour and that your outfit would be ruined with it. He’d let his eye roam your figure, taking in the sweatshirt you’d stolen from him yesterday, claiming it smelt like him, along with the cute giraffe print pyjama bottoms you adored so much; your hair clipped back messily, sleeves pulled up to your elbows, and Charles swore he’d never seen anything as beautiful.

He was elbow deep in dough before he knew it, hands sticky with egg yolk and flour, the substance sticking to his skin despite how hard he was trying to pull it off. You were standing next to him, your own ball of dough perfectly rolled and kneaded, hands free of any lingering blobs of dough. A piece of hair had fallen into your face, and you’d used your shoulder to attempt to push it back behind your ear again, huffing when it returned to block your vision. Something had just felt so right - he could imagine doing this after a hectic race weekend, coming home to you making a fresh batch of pasta to go with his favourite white sauce, love songs in the background and wine glass in hand. He thought of you standing at this very kitchen counter, flour smudged on your face as you taught a mini version of you how to knead dough, and how to use the pasta machine that he knew was going to come very close to sucking in his fingers.

“Charlie? You ok, my love? Pasta isn’t that hard to make, baby, you just need more flour.”

You’d looked over to catch him staring at you, cheeks red and eyes glazed, and it took everything in him to not spit out how much he loved you. He wanted to scream it from the rooftops, post it on every social media platform, say it over and over until your heart was beating as fast as his was. He watched as you leaned over, sprinkling more flour onto his hands, and all he could do was smile.

————————-

The second time Charles almost confessed the inner workings of his heart was during a race weekend - Spa, to be exact. Spa was a race that was heavy with memories, good and bad. Antoine’s ghost still lingered at every corner, and the cheers of the 2019 crowd still rang in his ears during his track walk. It was a weekend that stirred up a plethora of emotions, contrasting and deep, and it weighed on him. He’d made it a point to leave flowers for his friend every year, joining Pierre alongside the track when they went to pay their respects. This would be the first time you would be by his side, at your insistence. He’d told you countless times that it was he was perfectly fine with just Pierre for company, that you didn’t have to drag yourself out there with him and get soaked, but you wouldn’t back down.

“I don’t care whether it’s storming or if people are passing out from the heat, Charles Leclerc, I’m coming with you, whether you like it or not. You’ve gone through enough on your own, and I’m not letting you do it again, not while I’m here.”

He’d stood in silence, gaping at you until your expression faltered and your hands fell from their resting place on your hips. You were halfway through stammering an apology, explaining that you just didn’t want him to be going through that alone, that you were always there for him when he surged forward and kissed you, hands cradling your face.

He was so overwhelmed in that moment, thoughts of Antoine floating through his head, a tiny voice in the back of his head telling him that it could be his turn this weekend, that he’d never get to tell you how he feels. He pulled back, thumbs brushing over your delicate cheeks, lips forming the words, when suddenly,

“Charles! You have a press conference in 5! Get a move on!”

Fred’s voice broke through the bubble, and you both jumped, startled by the shout. A weight settled in his chest, Charles desperately looking back at you, hoping that what he didn’t have a chance to say was evident in his eyes. You smiled back at him as if to say “me too”, and that was the end of that.

————————-

The third time was during family dinner. His mother had invited the two of you, along with Arthur, Lorenzo and their respective partners, over to her cosy house in Monaco for an evening meal. You had spent the last thirty minutes stressing over whether or not you looked good enough to meet “the woman who gave birth to the prince of Monaco” and thirty minutes before that stressing over which wine to take, if any. Once a good enough Chardonnay had been chosen (a 20 year old bottle you had been gifted by your boss and had deemed too fancy to just open over a plate of pasta at home), and your hair curled and make up painted to perfection, you turned to look at Charles, smiling, shooting him a “What’s cookin’, good lookin’?” and he couldn’t help but laugh.

The drive to his mother’s house was fairly uneventful, with him humming along to a French song playing on the radio, one hand on the wheel and the other situated on your thigh, slipping in between the slit of cherry red, silk dress you had chosen for the occasion. The windows were down, the wind whipping through your hair, and you were smiling and singing along with him, a pretty picture of contentment.

You had calmed down by the time the two of you had reached the front door, confident enough to greet his mother with a hug and a kiss to the cheek, laughing when she said that you looked “absolutely amazing, chèrie”. You had bantered with his brothers, giving as good as you got, helped set the table and pick the music, and had even taken over Arthur’s babysitting duties, spending time playing dolls with his little nieces. Looking at how well you fit in with his family made Charles’ heart beat out of his chest. He felt a hand on his arm, and turned to see his Maman standing next to him, a light smile on her lips.

“She’s the one, my boy.” she said, and all Charles could do was nod in agreement, quietly saying the words,

“I think I love her, maman.”

Pascale simply smiled, and turned to walk back to the kitchen.

————————

He actually got through the first word and a half the fourth time. It seemed like whenever Charles actually got the opportunity to tell you he loved you, something or the other interrupted him, and this time was no exception. He never thought he would end up here, in a dingy club bathroom, wine stain on his brand new white shirt, and you standing by the sink laughing at him.

He had just won the Australian GP, Carlos coming in a close second, and Daniel stealing the third step of the podium. The season had started well for the team, and in natural Ferrari fashion, they had all gotten dressed up and found their way to the nearest club. Drinks flowed, partners were found and dragged to the dance floor, sweaty bodies pressed so close that it was hard to figure out who was who. He had been walking back from the bar, his and your drinks in hand, making his way back to his fellow drivers and you in a pretty black dress you’d picked out earlier in the day, when someone had bumped into him, wine spilling and staining his shirt. You’d turned at the noise that escaped his throat, an embarrassingly high-pitched squeal, and had kept a straight face for all of three seconds before you were laughing.

You’d taken the now empty glasses from his hands, set them down on the table and looped your arm through his, pulling him in the direction of the bathrooms.

“You know, now might not be the best time for a quickie, mon ètoile, my shirt is soaked.”

You had simply looked back at him, and told him that that was “even more reason to get that shirt off him”, your tone insinuating that you wouldn’t be doing anything of the sort. Once in the bathroom, the door locked and lights on, you’d beelined for the tissues, soaking them in a little water and soap before turning back to him with a determined look in your eyes. Instructing him to hold still, you’d taken to trying to scrub the stain out, armed with tissue that was on the verge of disintegrating. He knew the stain wasn’t going to budge, a voice that sounded like his mother’s telling him that he’d need hydrogen peroxide or vinegar at the very least, but he let you grip his shirt regardless, perching himself on the lip of the sink and pulling you closer to stand in between his legs. His eyes roved over your face, taking in the slight crease in between your eyebrows, and your teeth biting at your lower lip. There was something so endearing about the way you looked trying to rub something as stubborn as a wine stain out of his clothes that made him want to never let you go.

Tell her now, you idiot, who cares if you’re in a club bathroom, it’ll make for an interesting story to tell your kids later, he thought to himself.

“Ma chèrie?”, he waited for you to look up from his shirt before continuing, “I lo-“

“Charles! Did you manage to get that wine out yet? We’re waiting to order the next round of shots, mate, hurry up!”

The banging on the door, combined with his teammate’s voice, had interrupted him, the moment well and truly over. He grumbled to himself, something about never having a moment of peace, before looking up at you, nodding his head towards the direction of the door.

There was always next time.

————————-

It had been a quiet moment, just you and him somewhere on the coast of Monaco, yacht rocking with the waves, peaceful. The day had started the way it usually did, the sun streaming into his eyes as you curled into his side, screwing your eyes shut in a vain effort to try and sleep a little longer. He’d kissed you, slow and soft, before whispering a hushed good morning, smiling when he got a sleepy mumble in response. He’d pushed himself up to lean against the headboard, with you whining as he jostled you, only quieting down when he pulled you back into the warmth of his arms. The two of you had stayed there for another half an hour, drifting in and out of consciousness before your stomach rumbled, effectively declaring that it was time to get out of bed and start working on breakfast. Charles knew you didn’t usually like to eat in the mornings, claiming that it made you feel slightly nauseous, but that you were an absolute sucker for a good cup of coffee and waffles, so he set out to make exactly that whilst you were in the shower.

It was not going well, to say the least. He’d even pulled up a waffle recipe on his phone, specifying to Google that he needed one that was beginner friendly. It had started out well, with him grabbing all the ingredients listed, even going so far as to grab the measuring cups you used when you baked the vanilla cookies he loved so much; and then he actually had to start putting everything together. He’d ended up cracking the first egg with far too much force, causing it to spill all over his hand, with slivers of the shell ending up in the bowl below. Once he had fished out the infuriatingly small pieces out of the egg mixture and added the milk, he got to work measuring out the flour, only to misjudge how heavy the bag was, and spilling it all over the counter and himself. He was stood stock still, face stuck in disbelief when you had walked in, freezing as you took in the scene unfolding in your kitchen.

“Oh, my love” was all you’d managed to get out, before you were making your way over to him, brushing your thumb across his cheek and saying “You’ve got a little something there.”

Once the breakfast disaster was cleaned, and you had taken over to make edible waffles, the two of you had migrated to the living room, curling up on the couch under your favourite fluffy blanket, armed with snacks to start a movie marathon. Sundays during summer break were reserved for snacking on salted caramel ice cream and brain-rotting romcoms, and it was tradition for you and Charles to bicker over which movie was put on first. Charles knew he would give in after the first minute of arguing, when you pulled out the big guns and flashed a sweet smile at him, and today was no different. He was glad it was no different.

The day had passed in a haze of kisses, sweet fruit and good wine. The weather was beautiful, wonderfully warm with a light breeze, and Charles had stated that it was the perfect night for a picnic under the stars on his yacht, ushering you in the direction of your room, telling you to get dressed. He grabbed a few more bottles of the wine you had been loving in the last couple of days, cutting up fruits and cubes of cheese for your impromptu picnic, before packing it all up into a small basket you could take with you. You’d come out of the bedroom in a white summer dress, and Charles felt his heart stop at the sight of you. You looked ethereal, like his own personal angel, and he told you as much, before gently taking hold of your hand and leading you to his car, picnic basket in hand.

You had been out on the water for an hour or so when you had leaned into Charles, your head resting on his shoulder, arms wrapped around his. He’d looked down at you and smiled, all dimples and warmth, before leaning down and kissing you softly, his lips just brushing over yours. You’d settled in and were sharing your second bottle of wine, looking up at the stars and talking about everything and nothing, the topic of your conversation ranging from who could find the most constellations to new recipes you wanted to try out the next time you had the chance. Charles was watching you ramble about a new cake recipe that you’d seen (or was it pie? He was hardly paying attention, too caught up in the way your eyes lit up and the way your cheeks flushed) when he just blurted it out.

“I love you.”

You had stopped midway through your sentence, words suddenly sticking to the inside your throat as you gazed up at him. He was looking at you with glazed eyes, the stars reflected in them, and panicking because what if you didn’t say it back? What if he had misread the situation so badly and had ended up ruining a perfectly good day because he couldn’t keep his thoughts to himself like-

“I love you too.”

And just like that, the breath was knocked out of his chest. You loved him. Him, Charles Leclerc, you loved him. He wanted to hear those words every single day, every morning when he woke up, every night before he went to sleep, every day for the rest of his life.

“Say it again”, he begged, needing to make sure you were really saying that you loved him, and this wasn’t just some sick, twisted dream, a figment of his imagination. You repeated it in hushed whisper, again and again, watching as the dimpled smile you had come to adore grew on his face, before pushing yourself up and kissing him again.

Yes, today had been the perfect day.

[baguettelord]

Journeys in 2007

Y'all a friend of mine found some archived version of an old fanfic forum I was on in 2007 and I just need to share the entire EXPERIENCE that was re-reading fanfics I wrote at age 12.

I did not even have the internet at home until the year after, which means I was posting them from my school.

Come with me on this cringeful journey of Stargate Atlantis nerdism.

This response to a review: "thanx! ur mi 4th reviewer! u rok! i haven\'t red N E of urs, but i wil!" (seriously wtaf)

"we hat your guts"

"I never used to be a good person", she explained. (LMFAO??)

A scene with John spinning on a desk chair faster and faster while debating with Rodney and Radek whether the insane looking pink-afro super-powered terrible OC was attractive.

John getting shrunk by ancient tech, being sneezed on, washing the snot off in Ronon's glass of water, falling in tomato sauce, throwing crumbs at people.

In that same fic, trashing Weir's desk, running across Rodney's laptop keyboard writing swearwords while bored.

A spicy scene between Carson and the crazy OC character who had zero foundation of any kind of relationship or chemistry, but which was surprisingly one of the least cringe things my 12 year old brain came up with

Carson putting his hand over Rodney's mouth to shut him up and Rodney licking him - in the middle of a debriefing.

Going to a random planet in search of an unshrinking device for John, interrupting a wraith attack, helping an injured person lying in the road when a RANDOM man with crackhead NPC energy runs out of an alleyway, conks Carson on the head with a frypan, knocking him out and then runs off - and then the team including the smitten OC character leave unconscious Carson in the middle of the road to follow the sound of a crying baby????? WHAT ??? LOL???

"galleons of water"

Michael the wraith with mind reading abilities that can sense ancients for no explicable reason, and sensing that there's a romantic attachment between Carson and random OC. For no plot reasons whatsoever. It is never explained.

Pink hair OC then summonS GHOSTS TO FIGHT HIM? ?? ???

The ghosts kill him.

Then LUCIUS LAVIN APPEARS FROM BEHIND A TREE AND STARTS HITTING ON EVERYONE

There is no explanation for this - he is just there.

"I'm mentally linked to all nearby people with the ancient gene, so if I die, you all will die too." followed immediately by "SHOOT AT ME, ITS THE ONLY WAY" ????????????????????????????????what

This same character (pink haired OC) flying a puddle jumper directly up into the air, opening the hatch, backflipping out, landing on the roof of another puddle jumper and then remote detonating the original one in a kamikaze esque attack that somehow chain reactions into blowing up 5 hive ships.

Everyone fainting aLL THE TIME? Seriously I counted 5 people getting knocked out and at least a dozen faining from exhaustion / heat stroke / illness / etc. OVER FOUR FANFIC. JUST FOUR.

The worst part is that this is over 4 fics and is a REWRITE of the first ever fanfic I wrote. The original had an ABBA song for every chapter (I now cannot un-associate ABBA and Stargate Atlantis - thanks brain), the OC played the violin, could teleport, could turn into a horse sized hot pink space snow leopard that laid eggs, and also involved at some point a random series of inexplicable crossovers with Star Wars, Star Trek and Back To The Future. For no reason. Literally none.

I also wrote a couple of fic prompt / challenges which were kinda crazy

John wants to learn to surf and then Rodney gets captured by whales

Love triangle between Carson, Cadman and an OC.

Ancient device zaps everyone into being children and they have to travel the earth to meet up and figure out how to undo it.

I cry laughed tonight from this rediscovery. I have no idea what I was on at age 12 but apparently I thought it was a good time??

No wonder everyone thought I was weird LOL

[groovygrumpygoose]

Recap of the last few months:

Grandpa got diagnosed with cancer

Partner told me they loved me for the first time

Got dumped while I was at their home in another state

(Those three things happened in the same week?)

Visited my family and saw my brothers for the first time in a year!

Went back to therapy

Made up with a friend that my (now) ex convinced me to hate and have problems with

Met a sweet girl, started talking to her! She’s in an open relationship!! Yay no feelings 🎉🎉

Filing a no contact order against a friend from last semester for stalking and harassment??

Met an even SWEETER girl, god this one makes me flustered and excited and she makes me love life. She had the same birthday as my ex??

Other grandpa gets diagnosed with dementia

Childhood friend dies of fent OD at 17 years old while I live at the opposite end of the country

Homesick!

Sweet girl in an open relationship tells me she’s falling for me 🥺😬 god she’s so cute

Ex keeps randomly texting me about unnecessary and entirely arbitrary bullshit while also telling me to NOT text them ever (make up your fucking mind??)

Childhood friend dies in car crash

Sweet girl says sweet things and wants to go on a date!! Wants to FaceTime!!

Ghosts me before we FaceTime?? Still is the first one to watch my stories on Snapchat?? Has me on her private stories???

Made new friends!!

Visited parents

Went on a date with such a kind girl, oh my gosh I like her!!

I’m like that one Kalii song- I got hoes in different area codes😎

Uhhhh my little boyfriend (the girl I am not dating who is in an open relationship) was actually using me to cheat on her gf??

Who tf is her girlfriend??

Almost had a cishet white boyfriend??🤢🤢

Girlfriend found, let me talk to her bestie because she needs to know regardless of how shitty of a gf she is to this girl.

6 hr. FaceTime with girl’s bestie, we are besties now?? FUCK THAT CHEATER

Everything she told me about her gf was a LIE and she’s actually the sweetest, most amazingly kind woman???

More new friends!! These ones are from little miss cheater, thanks boo🫶

Sick as a dog.

Wtaf just happened.

[stardustinthesky]

i hate it when netflix gets an old show and puts it up on their site and you realize they’ve replaced all the songs you grew up with and loved with new ones and someone kindly uploads bits and pieces of the show on YT with the original songs and people go like ‘not the right song lmao’ and i’m like bitch i was there when it first aired and i still have the vhs lemme teach you the right ways

[criticallyacclaimedstranger]

Frankie baby for the character ask game.

Frankie babyyyyyyyyyyy thank you @floraandfrost!

favorite thing about them

I mean everything? His softness, his loyalty, his sensitivity, how he just becomes fed up at the end and ready to kill every motherfucker standing between him and getting back to Jay home. His patchy beard. His shuffle. His tumtum. The grey in his lovely hair. His shoulders. Everything.

least favorite thing about them

He needs to get better friends, or just learn to say no once in a while. Also the coke thing. Wtaf Frankie?

favorite line

Everything that comes out of his beautiful mouth when he's flying the helicopter.

brOTP

Benny shouts out his name first when he runs up to the crashed heli, instead of his brother's. I think Frankie hangs out with Benny a lot.

OTP

I mean come on. JAY.

nOTP

I'm not really into pairing up the TF guys romantically. I think military camaraderie in itself is so interesting: the dynamics, the honor code, the hegemonic masculinity, I myself don't need to add romance to it to make it fascinating/worthwhile, if you know what I mean? I don't judge anyone for doing it, however, but I myself just don't derive anything from it.

random headcanon

We all know Frankie Big Dick Morales is a pussy eating champion, and here's why.

unpopular opinion

I'm drawing a blank here. I'm sure I have one?

song i associate with them

You know, it's weird, I always had long playlists for my fics and characters in my previous fandom, but now it's like... nope. No songs. None whatsoever. Frankie is musicless. It's probably because I've been listening to the same decades-old songs for the past 15 years and using the same songs for different characters in different fandoms feels wrong.

favorite picture of them

I can't do favourites like that. All pictures are good in different ways. Plus I don't save photos, so I don't even have a gallery to fall back on. Here's a random gif that makes my heart go rroo ka do ka do goong ka do ka roo ka doong doong

[1ddiscourseoftheday]

Fri 15 Nov

Louis played Children in Need looking alarmingly good, like idk if that's just his go to television look or what but holy fuck!! THE OUTFIT. THE HAIR. LOUIS! AND on top of that they showed footage of him playing football and being cute and smiley and sweaty with children in the background while he sang WMI sounding amazing AND posted pics of him with not one stuffed bear but two, small and large.... It's just a lot ok? An interview came out today with pretty familiar-at-this-point promo answers... except for one, perhaps the most thought provoking take on the WMI lyrics yet: according to the magazine's obviously very well proofread transcription the lyrics are a message between himself and 'Andrew'!! Well that's definitely a new one. Also today, in a more coherent interview, Louis told us that the least laddy thing about him is his openness about his feelings, which we knew, and that he often just says whatever random ass thing pops into his head in interviews and later is like wtaf why did I say that, which we also knew but which some fanalysts need to be reminded of periodically I think, so thanks for that.

Flames is out and it's, pardon me for saying so but damn, really, FIRE!! Zayn truly has the voice of an angel and that's a fact. There's a lyric video up which is a good thing because the song has been mysteriously removed from Spotify in a bunch of places including the US, though hopefully that's not going to last long? Very weird!

Did Watermelon Sugar come out today? Well apparently not. Yesterday links were found on Harry's site, other very strong signs and sigils were spotted, promoting release is nigh hysteria but ultimately we were left hanging! The links were removed, no announcement materialized. I guess Harry's too busy thinking up things to send the fans at this week's most happening hotspot, the camped out line at the SNL studio. He has sent thus far: hot chocolate and pizza which I'm sure was very appreciated, Ben Winston (probably slightly less appreciated) so Harry could facetime them (okay that part is amazing), and cherries and watermelon for maximum confusion but also, thank goodness, hot chocolate and coffee because brrr. Meanwhile Howard Stern sent people out to try to get sound bites to make fun of the fans with but gave up when the fans wouldn't bite, the line were mistaken for Gwen Stefani fans (or maybe vice versa), they were mistaken for Pokemon enthusiasts... how the hell many different lines of people are camped out on this block?? It sounds crowded. Packed in like sheep on Harry's sweater vest speaking of which he wore another sheepy sweater vest today! One lil lamb this time. That gucci campaign was truly giving us a message about the future of fashion I guess, we just didn't see... I look forward to the chicken themed clothing.

Niall posted pics of him and Louis together in Mexico! A 'NTMY lyrics explained' video is up and when I tell you it does not have any surprises.... well I guess I was surprised by how entertaining the experience of watching Niall struggle to say, "so the line nice to meet ya is about... meeting someone" and "when I say she disappeared... it was like... I would turn around and she would have, you know, disappeared" for like four minutes was. Idk I guess I just like to see him sweat SORRY NIALL

Liam announced a small show for his album release, sold out the small album release show, was papped in London with Maya ("girlfriend Maya, 18 years old", according to the tabloids), and cheered up some sick children at a charity event.

[migleefulmoments]

The speculation that the tinhats have been tossing around the last couple of days (Darren ghost-writing music for big pop artists) is exactly how their new “facts” get added to their list. They spend a few days making up some BS and then later they will refer back to it as if it’s a proven fact.

Anonymous said: What is this new nonsense about Darren ghostwriting for Mariah Carey and others? What did I miss? Are they high?

Anonymous said: Oh Abby, when will the lies stop? You're making up bullshit about Darren ghostwriting songs now? Where did this come up from? Must have been from the drinks you and your friend had the other night. A drunken conversation of 'What if's and How about's' that will keep your little coven hanging on to your every word for weeks. You're a liar, Abby. You have mental issues. You need help. At least this is fairly harmless, I mean, you're not saying anything Anti-Mia, but still you're lying. Ugh.

Anonymous said: Did the tinhats seriously imply that maybe Darren wrote Taylor Swift’s “Out of the Woods” song? And then when someone pointed out that Taylor writes her own songs (including that one) they decided that Darren used the phrase “out of the woods” because he relates to that song. Sometimes I think they have reached the pinnacle of insanity and then they make these absurd reaches out of nowhere. They truly do believe that the entire world revolves around Darren.

Anonymous said: "I have always wondered how D got out of his record contract and this just might be an explanation." Ok I can't make sense of what the heck she's even trying to say in the rest of this post but Naya, Kevin and Amber were all dropped by their label (I think it was Columbia) because execs didn't expect their albums to make enough money. I suspect the same happened to Darren. I really doubt that there's anything more to it than that.

1. This IS EXACTLY HOW batshitcrazy cc lies get turned into facts.  Roughedreconteur is nuts- their posts are always insane with tangents that nobody else would ever imagine.  Abby used to disagree with them as they don’t seem to actually like Darren but lately, they are coming in with things that don’t offend her and she plays along, pretending that Rouged’s nutjob ideas are valid- it’s the US media pretending that when Trump makes a statement that is an outright lie it’s ok to repeat it likes it true or makes sense instead of calling him out. This time Abby really got swept up in the idea that Darren said on his Text message that he was almost “out of the woods”. Those of us who live in reality know that “out of the woods” is a commonly used saying that many people use to contact they are almost done with the worst of it- whether that is an illness “Dr, is he out of the woods yet?” or work-related projects like Darren did or just like what Trump thinks is happening now that McConnell already said he was “lock-step with Trump” because he doesn’t understand that he has already been impeached and that won’t go away, ever or literally you are coming home from a hike and you almost “out of the woods"ba-dum-pa. It wasn’t a reference to Taylor Swift’s song.  Taylor does actually write her music, she started out as a writer when she was 15. Ironically, one of the tinhatters mentioned that Darren went to a Taylor Swift concert and her mom hugged him- that may have happened but I know for sure he went to a T.Swift concert and Taylor was walking down the aisle from her outer stage back to mainstage and she saw him and hugged him and I know this becuase I was there. This is the sum total of the evidence they going on to arrive at “Darren wrote ‘Out Of The Woods” and was referencing it.  

2. One only needs to spend 4 min with Wikipedia to realize that Taylor and Jack Antanoff wrote the damn song- not Darren Criss. 

3 Taylor’s Label was Big Machine Record, not Columbia

4. I am also pretty sure that Columbia dropped Darren’s album because they believed it wasn’t commercially viable.  Record labels don’t care if the singers like their albums. Lots of people have had music they didn’t like released anyway.  Record labels are out to make money and they will do whatever they can to recoup expenses they spent on making the album but putting out a nonviable album is even more expensive and sometimes they cut their loses.  Darren certainly didn’t have the power to shelf his own album or to cut some drug deal with the company to ghostwrite to what? Pay them back for the expense or to Ghostwrite until he’s paid off some arbitrary debt? But as you pointed out- the Taylor and Mariah weren’t on Columbia when Darren was (Mariah was at some point) 

5. As for how they got to Mariah Carey- Darren sang Mariah Carey on Lip Sync Battle and “he has no known connection to her” and according to Abby and Rouged, people always sing songs connected to them (I don’t watch it much but I’m pretty sure that isn’t true). It looks to me like Darren was slotted into a show that was clearly just a Mariah tribute. I suspect it had to do with timing and nothing more. Lots of people battle someone they are connected to but that isn’t a requirement. Rouged claimed the star he battled was LA Reid (It was Jermaine Dupri). Jermaine co-wrote and produced many of Mariah's biggest hits although Heartbreaker written by Mariah and Jay-Z and produced by DJ Clue.  Rouged argued that LA Reid is connected to Mariah Carey (he was- he was her label head for many years).  When someone pointed out that it was Jermaine, not LA Reid, Rouged’s excuse was she can’t tell the difference between LA Reid (who is 63 years old), Jermaine Dupri (who is quite short and 47 years old), and P Diddy (who is 50). Dude, those 3 men look nothing alike. 

6. Nobody even mentioned Rouged’s nonsense about how Ryan Murphy wanted to get song rights quickly so he had the cast themselves work their magic to obtain those rights  WTAF? I am quite sure that the process for obtaining rights was something the legal department did and it wasn’t like Ryan called up the singer and asked- it would have been something official done through their representatives.  Clearly, Chris Martin said “no” so we know they had input but it still wasn’t Ryan called Chris and Chris said “no” but later he said “yes” and that was that- no legal papers were signed.

7. Abby claims there us a “Mia figure’ in Royalties, not sure what the hell that means  

8. Abby and Flowers are trying to make Mariah’s butterfly thing and Chris’s Butterfly IGs into something so Abby claimed Chris posted a pic of himself in front of the butterfly mural “before the battle”. Well, yes he did...it’s dated August 2018 which is before Darren’s Jan 24, 2019, Lip Syn Battle...on that, she isn’t wrong LOL.  

This is honestly one of the most harebrained theories I’ve read to date as it relies entirely on multiple things that aren’t even real  

The actual posts under a cut because they are looong 

rougedraconteur asked: Whenever something really strange happens like the “cough hacking “cough” of an ENTIRE site to the point of shutting it down, that has had only minimal action from a questionable enterprise that has failed in most ways and has had at least one party sending desperate signals and the other acting like they had cut them off already, that means something, but probably not exactly what it looks like on its face. I think D’s response, saying HE, not WE, is “almost out of the woods,” is telling.

ajw720 answered: Look at that song again. Look how specific some of it is. Lying on your couch. The feel of your necklace around my neck. You put on the brakes too soon, 20 stitches in a hospital room. All the wolves, the ice and snow of being frozen out, attacked by the enchanted forest itself and caught by vines just when you had almost made it to the ocean. You get there, and find…yourself. Or just someone like you? The mirror image, what that journey made you into, or something else, more real?

So, I think it is possible that “Royalties” may spoof some very famous “songwriters.” That IS the premise, and D has set him and an M type “just ugh” up as a “songwriting team.” One that is, in THAT clip, not so great, and in fact terrible. But, D is in deep with the professional songwriters guild. THAT, is fact. But why, exactly? Is he “ghostwriting” for someone famous for writing ALL their own songs? Mariah just got into their Hall of Fame, gossip is she wrote nothing much, all ghosted.

So, Royalties? Will it make fun of that type power pop star? Will they be credited, or “ghosted” so the star gets all or most of the credit? Mariah is not the only power pop star D has been associated with, in strange but oddly significant ways. It is very telling that most celebs on Lip Sync Battle compete against a former co-star, “significant other,” or old pal. Not D, and that meant something. L.A. Reid has a long connection with Mariah. To the public, D has no connection with either.

So, when you do a Mariah tribute on a show as kitschy popular with superfans of celebs as Lip Synch Battle, you would OF COURSE pick L.A. Reid, who is a power producer of more than a little questionable reputation and no real entertainer on his own, really, but well connected as her long-time producer/rumored former lover/long time cheerleader and friend. And D. Who is WHAT to them both, exactly? That whole thing NEVER made sense, except that D BECAME Mariah, and stole that show. Hmmmm…

Who else does D know that is a huge star that writes their own songs? In fact, is known for that, even critically praised, well above her singing abilities? Tay/lor. He was at one of her concerts, and was greeted in the crowd by her mom. He has been behind her in another venue, they have crossed paths. At this point, she has certainly been managed, or managed herself, much better than Bieber, her male counterpart. IF she has ghostwriters, they would be well-hidden and tightly secured.

**************************************************

Hello @rougedraconteur. Cough, cough, hack indeed.  I will never believe some random person went and deleted posts and blocked people from a band’s SM that most people have never heard of. In my opinion, inside job, meant to send a direct message, which to us is unclear, but the recipient received it, of that i have no question (I have wondered if D has tried to withhold the new EP, nothing else much makes sense especially in light of his brother seemingly struggling to pay the bills).

Really interesting on the song reference in the tweet “once I’m out of the woods”, I have never heard that song, but wow, how close is this to what i perceive as reality? This could BE D and now that i understand the reference, just like i think he wrote the tweets from NYE  when he said “and here we are now, I made it, we made it. I’ve been looking forward to to this for a long time…the Soaring Twenties…seeing clearly in 2020”, I am starting to lean he wrote these tweets that indicated he was “tending to some other obligations” (which include a fake wedding, endless promotion for Swiller, Fashion Shows, Family Honeymoon in the Philippines, TB commercials and other endless adds, and promoting SK). Far too smart for the Jumping Jackass or PBB. And well, in combination, an interesting series of tweets.

For those other who don’t know the song:

Looking at it now It all seems so simple We were lying on your couch I remember You took a Polaroid of us Then discovered (then discovered) The rest of the world was black and white But we were in screaming color And I remember thinking

Are we out of the woods yet? Are we out of the woods yet? Are we out of the woods yet? Are we out of the woods? Are we in the clear yet? Are we in the clear yet? Are we in the clear yet? In the clear yet, good

Are we out of the woods yet? Are we out of the woods yet? Are we out of the woods yet? Are we out of the woods? Are we in the clear yet? Are we in the clear yet? Are we in the clear yet? In the clear yet, good

Are we out of the woods

Looking at it now Last December (last December) We were built to fall apart Then fall back together (back together) Ooh your necklace hanging from my neck The night we couldn’t quite forget When we decided (we decided) to move the furniture so we could dance Baby, like we stood a chance Two paper airplanes flying, flying, flying And I remember thinking

Are we out of the woods yet? Are we out of the woods yet? Are we out of the woods yet? Are we out of the woods? Are we in the clear yet? Are we in the clear yet? Are we in the clear yet? In the clear yet, good

Are we out of the woods yet? Are we out of the woods yet? Are we out of the woods yet? Are we out of the woods? Are we in the clear yet? Are we in the clear yet? Are we in the clear yet? In the clear yet, good

Are we out of the woods?

Remember when you hit the brakes too soon Twenty stitches in a hospital room When you started crying baby, I did too But when the sun came up I was looking at you Remember when we couldn’t take the heat I walked out, I said, I’m setting you free But the monsters turned out to be just trees When the sun came up you were looking at me

You were looking at me

Oh! You were looking at me

Are we out of the woods yet? Are we out of the woods yet? Are we out of the woods yet? Are we out of the woods? (I remember) Are we in the clear yet? Are we in the clear yet? Are we in the clear yet? Are we in the clear yet? (Oh, I remember)Are we out of the woods yet? Are we out of the woods yet? Are we out of the woods yet? Are we out of the woods? Are we in the clear yet? Are we in the clear yet? Are we in the clear yet? In the clear yet, good

Dare I hope that perhaps D is really optimistic about the year ahead?  Because add in the HW stuff (on 2 most anticipated queer shows of 2020 lists, the reference to SB being leaked, what we know about the other characters, what we don’t know about Raymond, and the otherwise silence about the show), things are, shall we say, interesting.

On R/oyalties, a/k/a the show that is used to pay out every user/leach in his life (SK, RR, PBB, Algorithm Winners, etc), my understanding, and it is limited, is that they are in fact writing songs for popular, mainstream artists. Unclear if they are named songwriters or if they will be “ghosting” for people and based on the fact that the first artist is played by CT, I would venture to guess that they talent isn’t that amazing, so yes in many ways, making fun of the talent and pointing out that behind most of these mainstream acts are writers we never know or see.

On D himself ghosting, quite possible right?  It could explain a lot.  Including, if he bought it, being pushed to buy a $3 million home for his beard (which could possible be an agreed upon pay out). I have always wondered how D got out of his record contract and this just might be an explanation. Perhaps he agreed that instead of releasing his own music that was not authentically him, he agreed to write music for other artists that may or may not include the above reference individuals?  No question, his spot on Lip Sync Battle was odd if there is no association to MC and yes, she has a clear and obvious connection to to L.A.  This is no question, something to think about and ponder.  He is an incredibly talented songwriter who, to date, has not released, that we are aware of, a ton of material. It would make sense if he is writing for others and I would guess ghosting would pay well.  You definitely made me think.  

mmack062. 1Just a quick correction, it was Jermaine Dupri (Janet Jackson’s former fiance) not LA Reid on LSB with D.

ajw720 Thanks @mmack0621!

flowersintheattic254 Only 2 things spring to mind here. 1. Was the run of butterfly posts from C prior to and after D’s lipsynch performance so maybe he has ghost written for MK and 2. Once ‘he’s out of the woods’. It may be a reference to a TS song, but considering the location for the sham was in the woods I would like to hope he’s near to escaping and out of the woods soon 😉.

ajw720  @flowersintheattic254 perhaps a double meaning then?

C posted this before the battle.

rougedraconteur. I like this, and I like Tay/lor, although that is a recent development, on my part,  but I think she is coming more into her own with more near total control over HER mammoth “overnight” breakout career than she ever had before. Remind you of somebody? Getting there, anyway. And yeah, some folks have to write under another name, for various reasons.

Butterfly IS a Mari/ah Car/ey Trademark, but it is for Tay, too.  She posted a giant butterfly on a wall in Nashville with her most recent album.  Not saying we are right, in either case or with the connections, but I believe you should look at everything and how it might connect, as a possible piece of this puzzle.  Mar/iah was recently inducted into Songwriters Hall of Fame, as a recent piece of gossip I saw stated, though she was unqualified for it.  Ghostwriters who CAN’T be revealed because the celeb and management won’t allow it, as detremental to the Big Star who is a MoneyMaker.

Can anyone verify that D’s old roomie Je/ff Jerni/gan, who went with D to Ka/tyPer/ry’s western bday party, around 2012 or 2013 maybe, during THOSE years, was with ASCAP in some “official” capacity, and that his sister worked in a big-sounding job with F/ox At that time? Connections.  I know JJ has moved on now, but D has always been involved with ASCAP and recognized as a SONGWRITER, even by Gl/ee and RIB, and hung around with other songwriters and big pop stars kind of above his pay grade at the time, if you get my drift.

Think of the swiftie songs both D AND C have sung or lipsynced to in their online posts.  They connect to at least some of her stuff in SOME way.  And that’s a fact.

ajw720 Just adding a few significant facts.  The Human EP was released on my birthday in 2010 (July 20) a few months prior to rocketing to stardom, seemingly giving him an even bigger platform to have his music heard.  Since that time, D has released very few original songs (almost 10 years) even though we know he was signed to a record deal with Columbia for several years and he has told us that he wrote and recorded many songs for an eventual album that was never released.  He even spent an entire summer in the UK writing songs  with people like B/runo M/ars.  And Columbia funded a summer tour to test his songs and popularity. A tour that sold out. So what has D released?

1 Solo EP with 4 original songs, one of which he claimed was written many years ago when he 1st performed it (untrue written during LU) and 1 of which he has given his brother credit for writing the chorus.

1 EP with his brother with 4 original songs, which he claims were mainly written by his brother

1 SK show back in 2011

2 original songs performed on G/lee

And 4 or 5 songs for the LU tour, none of which were released (I don’t count IDM as that wasn’t specifically written for the tour and only performed once).  And ONE of those songs was “ghostwritten” by wa/tsky (either Pheromones or PPG)

The songs he wrote for R/oyalties yet to be released

In 10 years, he has released FOUR solo tunes, FOUR, despite being signed to a huge contract. FOUR, on an indy label.  And I believe he only released them because he was forced by contract as he owed it to the Jumping Jackass (hence the name H/omework, a chore that has to be done).  And a total of, not including R/oyalties, maybe 30 including a musical for his theater group that was performed 9 years ago.  Where has all his music gone?  Now, I am certain he is holding back on solo tunes because he does not want them associated with PBB.  But still, it is a least worth questioning.

[dawnie1988]

SPN Episode 4 Thoughts...

So, not quite what I was expecting at all, given all the images we were given of that fight scene, but a damn solid episode regardless. And let's take a moment to really praise and appreciate that opening scene because hot damn! Incredible fight montage, love the way it slowed down in different spots to really emphasize the moves, just textbook definition badassery and hats off to Mr. Ackles for it 👏👏👏

However, although it plays along into my endgame theory that we'll end up with a bit of a season 5 revisit where that old prophecy of one brother must kill the other must finally be fulfilled, I'm just not too sure what it all means, so in general the whole thing kind of freaked me out. Though I have since seen a very interesting theory in regards to it being Sam's connection to Chuck from the bullet and him being able to see all of Chuck's other versions/stories of them. We shall see...

I honestly kind of thought I was gonna be disappointed by it not being the more action centered episode I was envisioning, but then I forgot how much I miss just a good ol' case of the week episode. The brothers doing what they do, even if it was a bummer case, them having to take the kid out like that, the kid turning himself over so he couldn't hurt anyone else anymore, Jensen's song so perfectly playing in the background! But if that wasn't enough, the line from the kid's father, about how they don't know what it's like to be a parent who would do anything for their kid? They do know!! They know very well!!! Uhhgg, gut punch.

Dean's eating his feelings. Big time. Sames. 'Nuff said bout that.

Sammy is all kinds of jaded right now and it's hurting my heart 😞 It's bad enough to see him in pain, but to see him losing hope like this? Yup, hurts big time. But can we please applaude that end car scene? Sam confessing to just being tired and not ok, big brother Dean worrying over him like he does best, giving out the pep talk, man. Good, strong stuff, the entire scene. Jared was freakin' killing me. You could see it, feel it, that he's currently just done. Incredibly relatable for a lot of us, I know. Plus, I don't know if it was intentional or purely coincidental, but to me the whole thing was giving off major AKF vibes, which played very well.....even if I am just imaging it.

However, as great as all that stuff was, we've gotta address the other biggie. Because just as I felt episode 3 was Rowena's episode, I feel pretty comfortable in saying that this was totally Becky's episode.

Cuz I mean, just wow! Talk about an incredible, never saw it coming turnabout! I've never liked Becky, which I think is a pretty common though amongst most fans. Like, I can understand and appreciate what they were going for with her, a tease to the obsessive fans and whatnot, plus, if I'm not mistaken - but don't quote me on this - they also started that before they all really, truly understood just what the fandom had grown into and what it meant to so many. But still, she was obnoxious and annoying as shit to me. (Although I have always enjoyed the moments between her and Chuck) And by the time we got to the forced marriage, love spell, basically date rape thing with her and Sam it was like yup, screw Time For A Wedding, it was Time For Becky To Leave And Never Return. So, imagine my surprise when she pops up in this episode and was *gasp* one of us??!!

Again, always do love the moments and chemistry between her and Chuck, but I was kind of losing my mind a little. Every time she opened her mouth to tell Chuck about here life makeover and what she's turned and channeled her love of SPN and the boys into, and especially all the stuff she told Chuck about writing and fan fiction being real writing......I felt like every word she spoke I was like 'yup....yup.....yes!.....Preach. On. It. Sister.'

That whole monologue, in particular, felt like such a mini love letter to not just the fans but especially to all you kick ass writers who don't get nearly enough credit.

So can we just make it official and agree we are all Becky in this episode? Good? Good.

Again everything with those two was pretty golden. I loved all the 'wink-wink-nudge-nudge' to the camera and the fans moments, like Chuck insisting that the Leviathans were freaking cool. Lol. I just love the way they can appreciate their missteps and aren't afraid to call themselves out on it.

But then shit got real. Jensen had said there'd be a moment where Rob would be his sweet, good natured self before changing into something more sinister in a heartbeat, and whoo nelly he wasn't kidding! It's absolutely wild to me that kind, soft spoken Rob is even capable of making such a change but damn if he didn't give me the full on heebie jeebies. And then the other big moment: Becky's husband comes home and he freakin' dusted him! Like, full on, Thanos Snapped his ass and dusted him!

I literally had to pause for a moment because I was having a 'holy shit!' moment. And then we hear hers kids coming in and it was like no, surely he's not gonna......AND THEN HE DID!!! Again, actually had to pause for a moment. And then this line of ' Oh don't worry they're not dead, they're just gone.' .......I'm sorry, but WTAF does that mean?! Are they in another universe? Are they in some kind of in between world like The Empty? Or they stuck on a mountain top in the Himalayas?? I repeat: WHAT DOES THAT MEAN???

Then he dusted her and again, I never thought I'd be anything but thrilled to see her go but God damn, that was rough and I felt genuinely sad for her.

So yeah, big, heavy episode. I feel like I should give more attention to all the Sam and Dean moments, especially that final scene of theirs, but if I get into it more it's gonna mess my head up big time. But it was, hands down, one of the best, strongest, most emotionally impactful Winchester Broment ever and hats off to both guys for slaying it.

In conclusion, I have never been more terrified of Chuck.

Special Shoutouts: Benny! Another moment I had to pause on cuz I could instantly hear, even through the time zone differences, the screaming of several of you on here over that.

And also, MVP goes to Toby the Beaver. My mind will not be changed on that. Ever. Deal With It.

[florenceisnottrash]

10 reasons to stan N.Flying

Members: Kwangjin, Seunghyub (leader), Chahun, Jaehyun (my personal bias), Hoeseung.

Lastest comeback : Hot Potato (this is a whole ass bop I tell you)

Agency: FNC

Members in suit (because it is important information):

1- They love their new maknae

We often see a period of awkwardness between the old members and new ones. It’s understandable too, when you’ve been training for years with the same people and someone new comes, the bond might not be as strong. But it’s a totally different game for N.flying. The bond the 5 of them have could pratically pass as if they’ve been together since debut! They adopted him right away, even Jaehyun... who lost his title of maknae (and is still salty about it ;) )

And on to of that, the members can’t get enough of Hoesung cuteness! Neither can I.

I love caring dads

They love him... Even though they used him as bait in “The real” MV 

2-  Their MV’s are pure genius.

Seriously, who comes out with those ideas?? I could watch their MV’s all day, they never fail tomake me laugh! They’re just so hilarious my lungs still hurt. And can we talk about the plot twit in “The real” or the concept of “Hot potato”! What’s make me the happiest is knowing they found their sound and the type of songs they want to make! They seem to be having so much fun with this concept.

Some gifs of their mvs.

I find hoesung face on this one the FUNNIEST. My fav part of the mv.

3- Multitalented leader

-Leader     

- Sings    

- raps  

- plays the piano   

- so cool  

- the father of my kids

-plays the guitar     

- so freaking handsome god       

- cares for his members

Do you what other evidence to prove that Seunghyub is a perfect human being??? I have plenty up my sleeve! 

But for now, please enjoy the work of art that is Seunghyub.

CAN

YOU

STOP

4- This particular hairstyle

Graceful.

There’s nothing left to say.

Kwangjin, the next l’Oréal model.

5- They have the prettiest lightstick

Before stanning intensively N.Flying, I was convinced Monsta x, VIXX and Seventeen had the prettiest lightstick. I remember saying “When I’ll be rich, I’ll buy 30 of each and proudly expose them in my room”. Well, now I can live my dream life of having 90 lightsticks with N.flying official lightstick! The best about this is that’s it’s completely free and easy to replicate! How cool is that?!

Have a look at the work of art N.Flying provided us! Make sure to get one and support N.Flying!

And my hard-working babies making it!

LOOK AT HOW HAPPY THEY ARE JUST TO MAKE US HAPPY. PLEASE STAN I BEG.

6- They have weird ass hidden talents

-Chahun literally feels no pain while doing his weird foot trick where he folds his toes and walk on them. It’s disgusting but hey, a talent is a talent.

- Jaehyun can make a X with his face muscles.

- Kwangjin has a body that could melt icebergs. yes it’s a talent

7- If you go out with Jaehyun, you go out with at least 3 different Jaes

sexy Jae (because let’s be honest, he’s the sexiest when he plays the drums)

Cool Jae

wtaf is going on Jae

No boring moments garanteed! 

8- They have an awesome choreo for “The real”

“The best choreos of k-pop” are often the ones of BTS such as “Fire” or Seventeen and even VIXX. But N.Flying caught us off guard with the release of the official dance to “The real”. If this isn’t art. tell me what it is.

Dance version of The real is here.

Can your faves dance this well??? I DONT THINK SO

10- They trust each other

This makes me crack up every fucking time.

While they were backstage during show champion, they were given a mission where Jaehyun had to question the members about various things such as��“what is you biggest complex” or “what would you do if you won the lotto”. One question asked was “If you were a girl, which member would you date”/ “Which member would you introduce to your sister”.

Kwangjin, Seunghyub and Chahun immediately said : Absolutely no one.

The whole video is here.

And when Chahun finally chose someone... this happens

BONUS #1 - N.flying wearing leather jackets

Chahun

Seunghyub

Jaehyun

Kwangjin

I don’t have any of Hoeseung :(

BONUS #2 - Cute Hoeseung

KYAAAAA ~

hehe

Stan N.flying, stan talent.  - God, 2018

[drunklander]

Drunj!Der Yells About Outlander

Thoughts on Ep. 313

Ermagherd guys, Droughtlander. It’s here. But it’s here with Hamilton stuck in our heads, cheesetastic secksi times and the knowledge that the beginning of next season is probs the most like the oh-so-high-up-on-that-pedestal-S1A than anything else in the series. (In a strange new place! Trying to build a home! Except this time they’re doing it together! With the kiddos! Plus a doggo! *grabby hands*)

I know I’ve been on the *cough* less than positive *cough* side of things a lot this season. And last season, if we’re being honest. And I was going to apologize for that, but honestly, I’m not sorry. That’s just how I fan. I flail about what I love, I rant about what I don’t. I’m *very* aware that’s not everyone’s cup of tea and that I’m the sort of fan the cast and crew shit on in interviews and on twitter. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

But I enjoyed the finale for what it was. I squee’ed! I yelled things at the teevee! I side-eyed like whoa! So basically the same-ish reaction I’ve had to most of the episodes.

(I never bothered doing a full S2 rewatch, but I might do one for S3 just to see if it flows any better when watched all in one go, but I have a feeling it’ll still feel more like individual units than a cohesive whole.)

Anywho, beer-fueled nonsense that offers nothing of substance under the cut.

Finding more and more that I miss the old-style title cards.

Hard pass on doing this VO twice, tbh. Like we know obvi she’s not going to die. Just have it be where it plays out in the story.

Ok but all I can think about when the carriage stops and the crowd of people walk by is the part in The Mummy when they’re all like zombified and chanting Im-Ho-Tep.

I was just about to snark on Claire apparently having a change of clothes in the damn carriage but alas, we didn’t have to headcanon that she went and changed somewhere. No snarking for me.

Although for fucking serious? She changed back into the same damn outfit?! Ffs. Let the damn woman wear a different dress.

Aw, Fergus lets his wife come with him and doesn’t leave her behind in the woods with Willie. (I heart Marsali.)

“I’ll gut you” is apparently Young Ian’s go-to threat. It’s cute he already has a signature murder-style. Now you just need a rad serial killer name, dude. Take the hiatus to think about it.

This whole thing with Claire and Geillis is like ♬ I know, you know that I’m not telling the truth. ♬

I love that the Army/Navy rivalry spans both time and country.

But for real. Lord John in this scene is my goddamn everything. Sorry, Captain Babyface. I like you, but I need my dude out of those handcuffs and LJG is fucking *bringing it* right now. Can Jamie keep the handcuffs though? They might come in handy once he’s back on the Artemis... ;)

Ok but the final lingering shot of the pining face. Why. It was such a great scene. Lord John helping his buddy. Jamie being like yep, I still get in trouble, thanks for the assist. A nice goodbye. And it could have just ended there and been perfect, but nah, gotta smack everyone over the head with 1000% commitment to my least favorite trope.

#GetJohnABoyfriend2k18

Ah a “why are you here” callback to ep. 111.

For real though, Geillis is fucking nuts. Claire knows Geillis is fucking nuts. Claire knows Geillis has Young Ian. WHY ARE YOU LIKE HAVING CASUAL STORY TIME WITH HER, CLAIRE! DON’T TELL HER THINGS!

CLAIRE WHY ARE YOU TELLING GEILLIS ABOUT GOING BACK TO THE FUTURE! WHY ARE YOU TELLING HER ABOUT BREE! THIS IS A TERRIBLE IDEA! STOP SHARING THINGS WITH PSYCHOPATHS!

Also, we’re just casually talking about time travel in front of Hercules? I mean, I guess since he’s enslaved, no one gives a shit what he hears because it’s not like he can do anything?

“He was one of my favorites.” She’s fucking nuts but I still do love Geillis.

*zones out through discussions about the mechanics of time travel*

Did you really think you *weren’t* going to get locked in, Claire? YOU KNOW WHAT GEILLIS HAS DONE, YOU WERE CLEARLY GOING TO BE LOCKED IN. BREAK THE FUCKING WINDOW OR SOMETHING IF YOU WANT TO GET OUT.

I get that this is a parallel to the pilot when Claire’s watching the dancers at Craigh na Dun with Frank from the grass, but part of me is still wicked uncomfortable that they’re again using Black people as basically set dressing. I know it’s in the book, I wasn’t a fan of it there either.

How I think of Margaret during her Visions R Us office hours, basically.

Man, they really committed to this damn rabbit and bird thing. Maybe it’s some folks’ jam, but it never really struck a chord for me and the more they kept bringing it up, the more it makes me roll my eyes. Maybe because birds and rabbits were never a thing with Jamie and Claire? So it just seemed wicked random and kind of forced? Whatevs.

Hated Margaret channeling Bree in the book, hate it here.

This whole thing is so much weirder in the book, but just because they made it less weird for the show doesn’t make it good.

Like if we’re getting an exposition dump from Archibald about the prophecy, we really don’t need the weird Bree thing about someone coming to get her.

Yi Tien Cho channeling Inigo Montoya is kind of my everything. “I’m Yi Tien Cho. You are not worthy of this woman. Prepare to die.”

Petition for Rihanna’s “We Found Love” to be Yi Tien Cho and Margaret’s wedding song.

Omg so much explaining what we’ve already all figured out. We need to headcanon like 75% of Jamie and Claire’s reconciliation, but let’s spell out 2378235 different ways what Geillis’ plan is. (Maybe it wasn’t that many ways. But we’re doing a fuckton of exposition dumping in this episode.)

Ok seriously. The guy with the alligator head drinking chicken blood. Ugh. We got white savior stuff last week, but at least Temeraire had a part in the plot and got some agency at the end? Still problematic, but (maybe?) as minimally problematic as it could be if it was going to be included? This is literally just a backdrop for a conversation with Margaret. Blergh...

And then they have them carry off Archibald Campbell as Yi Tien Cho and Margaret look on in horror and omfg this is not good.

(ETA -- In which Roxane Gay says it better than I could: “It’s all very colonial fever dream, not so vaguely racist, and I honestly forced myself to let it go so I could continue with the episode.”)

“We lost Faith. We will not lose Brianna.” This line sure would have hit home a little harder had we actually seen Jamie give a crap about Bree at any point during the season. In the moment it works, but looking over the whole season *weakly gestures, tired of wishing things had been done differently*.

The goodbye kiss just in case though hits me in the feels. 

Well isn’t Geillis telling Claire “a life for a life” a nice perversion of Claire telling Jamie that he owed her a life in season two.

And then Jamie grabs her hand all gently and I have feelings about the two of them at the stones/pool, guys.

Why does dead!Geillis look super fake? I have questions.

Slash Young Ian is gathering up jewels or something, right? Before he runs out of the cave? He’s like picking shit up off the ground...

Still could have done without the bones in Joe’s office bit, tbh. But whatever.

I know she’s like a bit traumatized, but Claire holding a bloody machete is my aesthetic.

Awwww, lookit that lil family. *heart eyes*

Omg but the stuff on the ship is the eye of the storm. Like the episode is the storm. And the sex is the eye. Because in the eye of the hurricane, there is quiet. For just a moment. GET IT?! GET IT GUYS?! OK FINE I’LL JUST KEEP SINGING HAMILTON OVER HERE BY MYSELF.

I’m way too proud of myself for this tweet though:

“Surprised I dinna have a full head of white hair, after all I’ve suffered these past few months.” ONE LAST WTF, JAMIE *SIDE-EYE* FOR THE ROAD! (I know Jamie has been through some shit. But literally ever since Claire showed back up, he’s managed to make almost everything about him so even though it’s a little joke, this line is just icing on the omfg, you’re killing me Smalls cake.)

#TeamClairesVeryFineSkin

I for real thought this wasn’t going to make it into the show. I didn’t think the quickie in ep. 309 was going to make it either. Glad they both did.

Claire being like yep, I can remedy the I’m still wearing clothes situation, stat, is my everything.

It’s so cheesy, guys. I love cheese.

Jamie’s bangs though, guys. Can we get the man a new wig haircut before next season?

Omg, that ass grab. That ass grab is my everything. Idk why. But omg. RIP me.

They def have made the sex a little less explicit this year. Except for the rape that they decided to shoot like a softcore porn, wtaf. But like, that doesn’t matter? It’s never been about the amount of skin showing? It’s about showing the two characters being wicked into each other, because if they weren’t then going through all the shit they go through wouldn’t be worth it? I’m *rull* glad that the show has finally realized that that’s an important thing to actually have on screen instead of condescendingly telling us that it doesn’t matter or we should headcanon it like they did all last year.

Ok, here for Claire going full mama bear at Young Ian, but girl. How much doctoring do you really thing you’re going to be able to do in this exact moment if you go up on deck.

Slash, what was she waiting for the whole time everyone else, including the two people she was with, was clearing the deck? I know, I need to just go with it, but this is silly.

Ok this is the only time we needed to see this/hear this VO. Beautifully shot. The Faith music is gorgeous, but like I’m not reading anything into it like she’s watching over them or anything. More just like Claire’s in a liminal state between alive and dead like she was when Faith died.

Dude, kiss your wife when you’re both on the surface and it’s been established she’s alive. (I mean, it’s super sweet, but SWIM, JAMMF, SWIM!)

All snark aside, there’s something a little beautiful about Claire spending half the season basically drowning, unable to really save herself and no one else around who cares enough to save her. And now here she is again, literally drowning and unable to save herself, but this time there’s a handy ginger around to lend a hand. Because she’s not alone anymore. And I have feelings. So many feelings. All the feelings. Feelings.

As they’re floating on their scrap of wood, let me take the obligatory detour into the 20 year old grumble that there was definitely enough room on the door for Jack too. WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK, ROSE.

The thought of crawling around in the sand in wet clothes gives me hives.

“I told you I’d never leave you again.” ilu, claire bear.

Ok but they’re both so sad that the ship went down and everyone’s dead and stuff and it’s moving and yay for hugs, but like. You know nothing about where you are? Why jump to the worst case scenario? The beach is literally littered with stuff from the ship? You made it so other people might have too? Also, clearly all of the important people lived because otherwise this whole half of the season was pointless?

That being said, these two are really good at making their faces show feelings.

It’s really not a strange question to ask where you are, Jamie. You were in a shipwreck. GPS isn’t a thing. I’d say it’s a pretty normal question to have, bro.

OK BUT LOOK AT CLAIRE’S FACE WHEN SHE SAYS AMERICA HERE COMPARED TO HOW SHE WAS FEELING THE LAST TIME SHE ARRIVED THERE. EVERYTHING IS OK NOW, CLAIRE! I HAVE FEELINGS ABOUT THE FRASERS GETTING TO FINALLY START A LIFE TOGETHER, GUYS.

Literaloling over the rando family just walking away like yeah, uh, you guys do you.

fin.

[homosociallyyours]

hi! 5,6 and 23 please for the song ask

THANKS!!

5) three songs you wish you could forget (because listening to them hurts)“Those Three Days” by Lucinda Williams--if you’ve always been the one who gets broken up with, this song is a real knife twister“On Eagles Wings” (Catholic hymn that has featured in basically every funeral in my family and which can often get me teary) “Wild World” by Cat Stevens--it makes me think of my mom.**I actually love these songs and only wish I could forget them bc they always give me emotions**

6) three songs you wish you could erase from history (because they’re terrible)“Summer Girls” by LFO--still remember hearing this song for the first time and thinking “wow, this is a REALLY long sprite commercial?”“Elusive Butterfly” by Bob Lind--Honestly the most horrifically stalkerish song? It used to play at one of my old jobs and every time I would listen and wonder how the fuck it was ok to sing about standing outside someone’s window breathing heavily bc you love them. “Watching You Sleep” by Bleu--another fuckin stalker anthem! “watching you sleep/right outside your window/inches away from sleeping with you.” These are lyrics written in 2003 (!!) that I also had to listen to at work and WTAF?? The only good that came from this song is that my ex and I used to change sleep to pee/poop and joke about going to the bathroom together. Otherwise this nightmare song can burn. 

23)  three songs that never fail to get you pumped up“Kate” by Ben Folds Five--one of the first songs I felt this way about, still a BOP! Would definitely put it on a wake up playlist. “Keep On Livin” by Le Tigre--for the days when getting pumped means finding the energy to keep going even tho shit is difficult. An pro-queer, anti-suicide anthem. “Steal My Girl” by One Direction--as if it weren’t enough that Louis Tomlinson write this absolute bop to celebrate his undying love for Harry Styles, it also happens to have the kind of infectious rhythm and catchy lyrics that make me wanna dance. It’s a gem, and when people don’t love it I’m honestly like ???!!?

These were so fun! If anyone wants to send me more I’m down! 

[aconitewolfsbane]

Steven Universe Reactions-The Movie

Long post is long. Movie length even. So I’ll put this one under a cut so it doesn’t take up all of your dash...

- IGN: Too Many Curtains. 7/10. - I can barely hear BlueD... - Well, it seems that they finally understand that he’s not he’s mother, so that’s good. - How big is that book?! - Shit, I paused at a bad moment. White had an ‘o’ face for half-a-second there... *shudders* - BOY BABY BOY! But BIGGER! Now with added NECK! - Friends? Steven, buddy, pal... They’re your family. Your weird, messed-up family, but still family. - Happy giggly Bloop! So precious. My daughter. - Diamond song! - He’s way creeped out. - “That’s great. Good job, keep it up. Bye.” *Whoosh* He could not get out of there fast enough. - CONNIE! - He just wants to be an independent little man. - SMOOCH! CONVERSE SMOOCH! She broke him. He’s gone. We’ve lost him. - He’s in LOOVVVEE! - That’s an old photo. - *forms bubble* *rolls down stairs* LMTO! I legit cackled! - CAT!STEVEN! No longer a kitten, but a fully grown kitty! - “You’re the boss.” “Heck yes, I am!” Go Pearl! w00t!

- Lion is not amused. - The chest is open! What was in there? We’d better find out at some point... - She was waiting for him. “I save you a seat.” - “Hey, any idea what Amethyst is up to?” “I have every idea what everyone is up to.” Garnet, that’s kinda creepy. Is she watching people shag? - That’s what a warp pad looks like from below. Huh. I was expecting it to be pointier, but still fairly close to what I’d imagined. *shrugs* - Cool sibs secret handshake. - BABY AME! - Also, if Amethyst can call them a family, so can Steven. - Aww! He even healed the flower that he picked. So sweet, so pure. Too good for this world. - Everything changes, kiddo. When the Fire Nation attacks. - Pearl’s feet... *squees* We’ve never seen her this relaxed. - Amethyst needed to be picked up. She has short legs. - Wait... pause. When they finished the song, like two seconds ago, they were on another hill looking over at the temple hill. But, now they’re behind the temple... Is that a hint of a small time-skip, a larger one, or just an error? - The discordant music from the promo... Still unsettling... - She heard. She just doesn’t care. - That’s very old-timey Disney... - She flicked Pearl’s nose?! Bitch is asking for it... Amethyst doesn’t even get to do that. (Well, not in public anyway. *eyebrows wiggle*) - Holy shit... I need a moment...

- Damn. That was intense. - Steven had to do it. But he’ll still feel guilty about it later. - “Holy sh--- she really got everybody?” Greg nearly swore. #LetGregSayShit2k19 - Well, Greg just had a small heart attack. - “I just have no idea what’s going on.” “Well son, now you know how I feel almost all the time.” Not helpful, no. But kinda reassuring. - Pearl’s the first one back?! But she usually takes the longest? Her coming back before Amethyst is weird... - That’s... new... - Oh no... She thinks that Greg’s her new owner... This is so bizarre... - RUBY! - SAPPHIRE! - Cold... Saffy, that’s cold, even for you... - AMETHYST! Wait... Baby Ame? - He’s uncomfortable. Because he’s a good guy. A lot of guys would get... gross, having a totally devoted female-presenting servant... Greg’s not like that. He’s a good bloke. - Spinel...

- Level of understanding: WTAF?! - Shake the ruby. lol. Poor Ruby. - She’s confused. - “She’s not going anywhere with you.” “We’re going.” “Never mind.” - Bismuth: “I thought you said she was just trying to kill you?” Lapis: “Wow. Quick turnaround.” Peridot: “No kidding. It took me months to stop trying to kill Steven.” Bismuth: “I’d say it took me a day, day and a half.” Lapis: “I’m still on the fence.” *All laugh* Ah, memories. Horrible traumatic memories. - “I could have lost all my character development!” Peri’s genre savvy. - She’s annoying now. - Motivational speaker Bismuth! - Happy Lappy!

- Lookit these dorks. Love ‘em. - Yeah, that’s is messed up. They’re not even singing... I’m scared. - Spinel, you missed your cue. Song’s over girl. - “Well, what do we have that’s deadly and dangerous lying around?” That’s ironic, coming from her... - The chicken is far too dangerous, as anyone who’s played a Zelda game would know. - LMTO! Peridot, never change! -He’s too sweet to hurt them... - “Hyjinks will ensure.” Oh boy. Strap in, this is gonna get wild. - “My scaffolding! My precious scaffolding!” Poor Bismuth. - She’s falling for her, geddit? - The Heaven and Earth beetles, oh no! So tiny! Save them! - Ruby!Garnet and Sapphire!Garnet! - BUBBLEGUM!GARNET - She doesn’t recognise him... - Did Pearl insist on driving him? Oh boy... - “Can you watch Garnet?” “Sure, but it looks like she’s doing a pretty good job watching herself.” Daww... She’s so cute!

- Peedee’s in a suit for some reason. That boy is middle-aged before his time... - Onion was just at the fry shop. Now he’s at Funland? - On the rollercoaster now? - The donut shop too?! How fast can that kid move?! I mean, he’s faster than Lion’s warps! Seriously, how?! What even is Onion?! - That’s Vidalia’s house, so it’s probably Onion again... - Lion’s so cute. - Oh, baby Ame is there, good. - She’s so broken... - She still likes eating, so that’s a good sign. - Well, he’s banned again. - LMTO! I kinda feel bad for Ronaldo now. - She remembered their handshake! Progress! Sweet beautiful progress! - AMETHYST! She’s BACK!

- Ame’s face! LMTO! - Let her keep running. It’ll buy some time at least... - That’s bad. That’s very bad. Extreme levels of not good. Superbad. - *deadpans* “Yo, I’m back, you dip.” LMTO! - Yes, because all of the most important test scans should be run on the popcorn setting. - Boy’s gonna give himself a hernia. - “What is that clod thinking?!” “Yeah! Lift with your legs!” - God, she even made rock and roll sound fancy...

- “Who’s here for the show?!” *random yells* “Who’s here cause it’s the end of the world?!” *more yells* One random guy: “Wait, what?!” - There’s a jasper in the crowd, but it’s not our Jasper. Gem’s in wrong location. - Everyone just relocated. Greg, Pearl, Garnet and Spinel were all in the front row. Now they’re second row. - Sadie and Amethyst song! - The Cool Kids are on board with this. They don’t know what’s going on, but it’s cool. - She’s not even looking? Holy crap... That’s major. Pearl’s moved on that far? Wow. Or is it because she’s simply forgotten about Pink/Rose? - STEG! - Poor Buck, blown off stage. That was rude of Steg. - She’s remembering! - Amethyst made bedroom eyes at Pearl. Be still my shippy heart. - PEARLMETHSYT! - OPAL! - She speaks! She sings! *squeals* We’d hopal’d for so long, and we were not disappointed! - Uh oh... Power fail...

- Another one that was built to make Pink happy... and failed because she couldn't be happy with what she already had. - Poor Spinel... - She’s back.

- LMTO! Garnet, you’re so precious! - Connie’s back! - *toilet flushes* *Greg steps out* *everyone points a weapon at him* “Alright, alright, I’ll wash my hands!” *walks back in* LMTO! Poor Greg. - Poor Connie walked in halfway through the movie, and has no idea what’s happening. - This is bad. Oh boy...

- Garnet’s back! - Garnet had a pompadour at some point?! They’d better show that in a flash back at some point... - True kinda love! - ALEXANDRITE! - Save CatSteven! Good catch Kiki! - Greg! Holy shit! - She sliced the fucking car in fucking half! Holy fuck, Connie’s a badass! That’s my girl! Pearl’d be so damned proud! - Onion toppled over! LMTO! - Go Steven. - She made him bleed?! Bitch has gotta... be redeemed, most likely.

- He’s BAACCCKKKK! - “You can’t just make everything better by singing some stupid song!” She’s new around these parts. She’ll learn. She’ll learn... - Once again, Steven’s at the bottom of a huge crater, not even hurt. Diamond boy. - Crap, the injector’s damaged... That’s not good at all... - OH FUCK!

- Thank the stars for bubbles... - “Steven? Steven, where are you?!” Look... look down. - She’s still taller than him! - *van drives into crater; pulls to a stop* *doors open; gems and Greg burst out* I don’t know why I found that so funny, but I did. - Lookit Pearl. She’s so proud! - “Looks like I’ve got a lot of kissing to do.” *starts kissing ground* *patches of grass spring up* “Should we give him a hand?” “We should probably get him some water. Stayin’ hydrated is very important when it comes to smooching.” *said whilst looking towards Connie* Garnet sees Converse in the future. - Random space grandma attack! Prepare for cheek pinches in 3... 2... 1...

- BlueD: “Knock knock, Steven.” YellowD: “It’s us.” WhiteD: “The Diamonds.” Yeah, no, really? Wow, I had no fucking idea... Such shock. Very wow. - “Are we interrupting... something?” “Uh, yeah. No. It’s over. We’re done.” - “What is that smell?” “I don’t smell anything.” *mutters* “That’s cause you live here...” Pretty much every parent has had this exact conversation with their teenager at some point. - He’s not able to deal with this right now. He’s had a hell of a day. - Grandma guilt level: OVER 9000! - “My Diamond-sss.” *forms three diamond shapes with her stretchy arms* LMTO! That’s precious! - Nothing to you, maybe? - Also, Yellow D laughed! Wow. - “Since the Earth is so disgusting...” White, you... caught us at a bad time, is all. - Also... basically: “I’m sorry, but your planet smells like ass. We’re leaving.” - Garnet’s little head shake. “I did... not see that coming.” - He’s twice Nanafua’s size now! Tiny grandma... - Amethyst’s the crane! - Grand finale time! - That was awesome! - Left some unanswered questions though...

TL;DR: Pink Diamond was worse than we thought; Steven is getting real tired of this shit; resetting Pearl is creepy as fuck, never do it; Greg is best dude, no arguments; baby Amethyst was so cute, but also deeply unsettling...; no matter what, Ruby and Sapphire will ALWAYS fall in love, no exceptions; Bismuth is a great motivational speaker; Connie is a fucking badass, OMG; you can fix everything by singing some stupid song; Earth confirmed to smell like ass; giant space goddesses want you to clean your room young man; dressing up for a big Broadway-style show will undo all your most recent trauma (Your results may very).

[saggy-tare-ious]

The Signs I Know - Sag POV

aries - my 11 year old bro is an aries and we argue like there’s no fuckin tomorrow. he annoys me so fucking much. he gets angry a far bit. very defensive. if i joke around about his appearance or how he does something will jump down my throat and yell. needs to chill out. doesn’t always take a joke. depends on his mood. he LOVES history like holy shit. when he was younger would run around and get into everything. doesn’t really move as much now HAHAH. isn’t interested in sports. sensitive. is awkward? stands weirdly and doesn’t look people in the eye. looks up a lot. plays xbox a lot. changes his interests so much. loves everything to do with world war 1 and 2. freaks me out a bit. wants to be in the army himself. has big fits. can get violent. he also has to have the last fucking word. like even if it’s a grunt or a random nose. does. my. fucking. head. in. IS NOSY ASF. so clingy with my mum. wants a hug all the fucking time. will piss me off then 10 minutes later will come into my room and tell me he loves me. fuck off. i also know this aries guy and he is a massive fuckboy. maybe a good friend but is scum when it comes to a relationship.

taurus - ik two taurus. the first one is so stubborn and is such a fuckin asshole honestly. we dated for like 2 weeks, kill me. he eats so much no joke. goes to the canteen every. fucking. day. he loaded. doesn’t share...... sometimes he does tho. he will go to the canteen and come back with like 3 meat pies 4 sausage rolls a bag of lollies a soda and a chocolate milk and won’t fucking share. most of the time he doesn’t eat all of his food so instead of giving to me or others he throws it at our leo ranga friend HAHAHAH bless him. he’s so uptight. he’s like that homophobe dad. he talks shit so much. and when he gets caught will throw anyone under the bus if if they didn’t do shit just to get himself out of it. jealous. the other taurus ik is a girl and do not like her. she makes me cringe so so so much. she sings 24/7. it’s not like she’s bad it’s just we are in fucking mATHS. jesUS. she said one time that she is a white girl with A BLACK GIRLS BOOTY like wtaf. girl you ain’t shit. it’s also like she mistakes sc as musically. no one wants to see you lip sing to some shitty radio song....... ok ok ok she’s not all bad she is actually quite smart and a good singer just needs to sTop.

gemini - ik quite a biiiit of gemini’s. all the gemini guys ik are HUGE flirts. one of them is one of my best guy friends and honestly has a new girl each week. we get along so fucking easy. is a trouble maker at school with his other guy friends. does the most stupidest and funniest shit they do anything to annoy the teacher in some way. the aries fuckboy is apart of his group. he lets people walk all of him especially if they are a love interest. forgives too easily but will be mad for fucking ages and then forgive them. funny asf. doesn’t do too good at school is dropping out next year. but he is very smart just doesn’t try. i have another gemini bff but she is very possessive in a relationship. will do and drop everyone for her partner. her current realtionship is toxic. both good people buttttt she is too obsessed. she is adorable and get real good grades. very hardworking and tries her best. funny. parties 24/7. alcoholic. serious but not at the same time. reaaal good at writing. said she wanted to be a journalist. says she’s a vegan HHAHAH

cancer - another one of my guy friends is cancer and he is moody asfffff. so many stereotypes in this post HAHAH. but it’s fucking true. he can be such a fucking asshole. cold one minute hit the next. he is like an angry dad. he is cold and doesn’t speak too much. but he’s funny. would fuck. star wars obsessed and does nothing with his life but play xbox. doesn’t care too much about school. found out he likes me tho he doesn’t show it too much. but he has said to me that he hates it when the other guys in our group touch me etc so i guess he’s protective ? he copies other guys style and hair ? literally tried to be this guy at our school until someone called him out on it. reaalll good at guitar.

leo - ik two stone head, beautiful, would fuck leo’s and a ranga leo WHO IS HILARIOUS ASF. bless him too bits. the ranga is also in my group along with the cancer and taurus. he tries to be liked by everyone and does what everyone tells him to do just to be funny. will bully and abuse other people just to be funny and to be liked. he thinks he will be this big youtuber. he honestly changes how he is so much around his ‘friends’ who tell him to do the most stupidest shit just they don’t bully him. he is creative and good at art. doesn’t take his job serious at all. i mean it’s a fast food restaurant. but anyways he doesn’t take it serious. doesn’t get angry too much but when he does it’s scary. talks shit. two faced. pride is easily hurt.

virgo - she is a perfectionist honestly. doesn’t cross out or white out anything bc it will look messy. does drama and music. good at art. real good grades. kind of a serious person ? don’t know her too much.

libra - is the mum of the group like holy shit. an alcoholic mum more like it. will talk to a guy for a week then drop them bc she got bored. gets a lot of guys bet then doesn’t at the same time ? responsible af but parties all the time. so much like a mum. love her but then hate her. no where in between.

scorpio - my mum is a scorp. we argue all the fucking time. will talk for ages at the lady at the cash register. is STUCK IN THE FUCKING PAST. brings up everything from the past can’t get over it. like stfu i don’t want to hear it. real negative. complains all the time. judgement. acts like she does everything in the house. she doesn’t. also acts like my brother and i are 3 and are hard to look after. even tho we do everything she asks to do and practically stay in our rooms all the time. she has no friends. says she doesn’t need them. trust issues. gives out second chances even tho she says she doesn’t. needs to chill tf out. my scorpio guy friend is touchy asf. needs to know what a personal bubble is. judgmental asf. laughs at evrythiiiiing. we talk about people we hate together in maths.

sagittarius - i knooow soo manyyy sags. my dad included and i love him to bits. we hardly fight unlike my bro and mum, still love them thooo. he complains the whole time when going shopping probably the only time where i want to kick his head in. funny asf too bless him. afl fanatic. loves sports. real short. like 5”6. my two bff are sags one is sporty asf and sensitive the other parties all the time is quite distant ? the sporty one is honestly so fucking weird never met someone like her. hard to put her to words. she falls in ‘love’ easily too. well crushes easily. she literally fell in love with a guy at our school who she never talked to b he was real good at guitar. she’s veryyyh sensitive. need to be careful of what i say. she annoys me so fucking much. we argue a lot too. but i love her. the party animal one is adorable and kind of responsible? she’s like scared of getting in trouble and will avoid it at all costs. funny and sarcastic. stone head. plays netball. tried to go vegan. good ass eyebrows. they both do actually.

capricorn - dated 2 of them. both funny. one is now a massive stone head. kind of a drop kick now tbh. the other is so so so funny and sporty asf. real jealous. said he’s loved me since he was in yr 7. he’s a year older. but we’ve hardly ever spoke ? HAHAHAH we’ve had a convo here and there but i hardly know anything about him. would ask me out all time. i finally gave in when i was in yr 8. it could’ve actually lasted longer then it did. he isn’t a bad guy. but me being a sag freaked out and dumped him after 4 days HAHAHHA. he is cringy online. loveesss his lil sister.

aquarius - we talked not dated and i like him so much i even considered if i loved him. ew cringe ik. maybe i’ll do a post just for him ? HAHA i must find out his time of birth 🤔 anywaysss he is weird, like it’s like he tries to weird or different. again cliches ik. watches so much documentaries. can’t swallow pills. belives meat and pills will kill us. thanks to documentaries. said he was a vegan for a day. good at sports. has a job with the leo and takes it seriously. horNY ASF. will ask for nudes even after you say no. just want someone to fuck. funny kind of? Hahha. has like social anxiety. looks depressed all the time. won’t talk to anyone unless you do. but then again he doesn’t look interested the whole time and makes you feel like shit and says he doesn’t care about what you say bc it’s boring him ? but yet tells me borin ass things idc about either but i listen and look interested ? HAHAH KILL ME. doesnt try too much in school unless he has no friends in that class. good at maths. says he doesn’t care all the time. SO FUCKING SENSITIVE AND A CRY BABY

pisces - my bff is a pisces and i love her to bits. we would never admit this to each other tho. she laughs a lot, which i like bc she laughs at everything i say and do. sensitive. popular. social. literally cannot go a week without going somewhere. hates to be by herself. doesnt try at school which pisses me off so much as i’m a try hard who gets straight a’s HAHAH. i often wonder wtf she will do with her life. good at art. creative. good music taste and style. we have the SAME humour. every guy loves her ass. can’t order her own food. has been diagnosed with depression when she was younger. it’s hard for to get things car both question if she has dyslexia. my best guy friend is also a pisces. he is real fucking sensitive. lost a shit ton of weight. i wonder daily if he eats. looks depressed asf. will let you speak. puts up with my questions about life and tries to answer them the best he can. we talk about whatever tbh. found out he likes me. wouldn’t go there. he is like a brother. bless him. used to be a big fucking asshole but has grown up a bit. has random knowledge about random things. on his phone and listening to music all the time. plays the bass. honestly reminds me of dan howell and suga.

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first post. just getting into astrology. well i’ve known about astrology and my chart for about 3 years but only now am i actually ‘delving into it’ ? don’t expect much HAHAH