#yes i did have too much caffiene Why do you ask?

[justsomeno1s]

God I love when creators put symbolism in their art.

I love when drawings have subtle bits and pieces to show that the creator cared about what they were making

I love when creations have subtleties and irony and so much fun stuff put together in them!!

Nimona's eye shines, Gravity Falls' various subtle Bill appearances, Omori's color schemes- I just

AAAAAAAAA DGSGSNFMDKALSLFN GOD I LOVE CREATORS WHO LOVE THEIR ART!! FUCK

[lumiereandcogsworth]

☕️✏️🎁🌙🎧

☕- do you regularly consume caffiene? do you find that caffeine helps manage your symptoms or makes them worse? no i never do. i really don’t like the taste of coffee and tea, and i don’t really have regular access to redbull or other energy drinks. the one time i did drink redbull though it was new year’s eve and i was playing monopoly with my siblings and i was just extra hyper and excited to play it LMAO.

✏- do/did you like or dislike school? i did like it, i was one of those autistics who needed to be perfect in school or i would die sjdksj. i had straight As from elementary school through university, and i am not trying to brag there i am trying to show you how much anxiety i have had my entire life🥲 in terms of socializing it was fine. i went to a TINY k-8 (ages 5-14) private school that made making friends incredibly easy. and then in high school (ages 14-18) i was lucky enough to find a great friend group that i felt safe with and i never really ventured outside of them. university i was most isolated, it was a Lot harder to make friends there. i had like basically 3 friends who i split my time between and that was it. which was good because i’m best with one-on-one things. but long story short, no i didn’t hate school as many autistics did. i, like ash from pokemon, wanted to be the very best, like no one ever was.

🎁- what’s your special interest(s)? have you heard of a little film known as live action beauty and the beast (2017) <3 im sort of in love with her <3 that’s honestly my only special interest, my brain has been utterly devoted to that film (and writing fic and building the SHIT outta that canon lore) for six years now and i love it so so much. i think a sub-special interest is like, french royal history. which i only enjoy diving into Because it gives me context and details for my batb 2017 world building. but yes that film IS my entire personality please ask me about it all the time forever :)

🌙- are you a morning person or a night person? absolutely a night person. i love the quiet, i love being the only one awake, i love that there are zero demands from the world. it’s just you and whatever you wanna do. mornings are beautiful and can be very serene but there’s this underlying feeling that i should be Doing something and i absolutely hate that feeling. (writing it like that, that’s probably a result of my life-long anxiety to meet every demand in school to get perfect grades lmao. nighttime was always the one time that nothing was required of me and i relished it. huh. interesting.)

🎧- what symptom(s) of yours is the hardest for you to deal with? sound is a big one, my ears are really sensitive to noise. also crowds and just socializing in general. anything that has to do with people i just,,, hhhhhh. i have no interest in dealing with people, which is a problem considering i’m not a hermit that lives in the mountains. i know some autistic people see socializing as a game they wanna win, like they can recognize the patterns and get really good at talking to people, but for me i just have no desire to bother with it. it’s exhausting. and usually pointless. (what is small talk. also why.) i’m thankful my current living situation is pretty accommodating for me, and day-to-day i don’t have to deal with too much. but noise regulation and socializing are my two kryptonites for sure.

[wizkiddx]

living and reviving II

yep when I said three parts I think I meant 4 oops

summary: an overdue conversation that has to happen - like it or not

warnings: cheating, swearing, pregnancy talk, lots more angst, think thats it?

tomhollandxreader

/////////////////////// prev

So with a new sense of dread and fear and complete and total isolation you uttered three single words before hysterically running away.

“Don’t follow me.”

Not now, not ever.

That had been three weeks ago.

And it still fucking hurt like hell.

It had ended up that Yamna had taken you back to hers, where you had stayed for a couple nights. During that couple of days, Tom had tried. He had tried to apologise, tried to explain, tried to fix things. But it just wasn’t that easy.

Whatever he said, it didn’t take back from the fact that he had in that moment meant it. So no amount of sorrys could ever take that back.

After everyone had realised just how serious their situation was, Tom had moved out of your shared flat - so you could at least be in the place you were comfortable. Afterall the nursery was built in your flat and clearly it was you doing all the baby stuff for the moment. Thankfully Yamna, having been cut loose so without job, offered to move in with you. Which was probably the only thing keeping you going.

Well, that and ben and jerrys ‘phish food’. Honestly the shop must think you’re running some sort of ice cream black market at the rate you’re getting through their tubs.

Everyone kept parroting that it wasn’t good for the baby. Too much ice cream . Too much heavy lifting. Too much stress.

And yes, it probably was. But that was out of your control . The stress and lack of man in the household meant you had to do the heavy lifting of shopping from the car up the stairs. Shopping meaning ice cream, which you only depended on so much because of the stress.

It was a vicious cycle of hell.

Even Yamna, the person you were relying on keeping you sane had started walking on eggshells. It was as though you were literally about to pop, she always had to have at least half an eye on you. You were even banned from locking the toilet door - just in case.

It felt like you were a captive animal, people kept coming to observe you, giving sad looks before gleeing the scene.

You hadn’t been sleeping well either. Of course, being 3 weeks of your due date didn’t help - but neither did the lack of Tom. In fact, for the first time since shit had hit the fan, you had actually been managing to get some decent sleep when Yamna knocked on your bedroom door, quietly calling your name.

“I’m asleep” Groaning, you pulled the covers further over your head, praying to god that she’d leave you alone. But of course that wasn’t happening, she just lightly chuckled before you felt the bed dip - she had perched on the edge… Toms side.

“You never normally sleep talk.”

“I’m never normally this sleep deprived.” She sighed, whilst you still stubbornly kept your eyes closed.

“I’m sorry I woke you…. but this is important.”

“What?” Almost grunting, you threw the covers down looking up at her in anticipation. That was another thing about pregnancy - you were always on high alert, always worried.

“Toms here.”

“Tell him to f off.” Quickly you stopped caring about what your bestmate had to say.

“He’s saying that he’s the little ones dad and that he deserves to be involved and…. and I think I might agree.”

“I deserve a boyfriend who stays loyal to me so clearly neither of us are getting what we want.” You weren’t angry at Yamna and snapping at her wasn’t the answer. And yet you still did it.

“Y/n….I love you and I am completely on your side. I just think that maybe, perhaps, you should at least manage to be civil before baby arrives. Otherwise… thats going to be a lot to deal with all at once.”

It was your turn to sigh, deep and heavy (or at least as deep as the baby let). Most infuriatingly she was right. The conversation had to happen at some point. With a baby there too it would only be even more traumatic.

“He’s here now?” It only dawned on you how broken you actually sounded when the words croaked out of you.

“Yeh hunny… I didn’t let him inside so he’s standing outside the door looking like a dickhead right now.” The image cheered you up a little, enough to sit up in bed and be wrapped in Yamna’s arms. Her actions said it all, she really only meant the best for you and knew how hard this would be. After a moment she leant back. “I almost considered calling the paps so they could get a picture and label him as a groveling dick.”

“You should of.” Of course you didn’t mean it, but the answer had you both laughing. It took a minute to calm down before she changed subject slightly.

“You want me to make myself scarce? I can hide in my room or go to the shops or-“

“Text the guy from the bar - you deserve a night off ‘babysitting Y/n’ duties.”

“I’m not babys-“

“Yes you are. Go out with him and have some fun, I’ll be fine.”

“You sure?”

“Yeh”

That was a bare face lie - but Yamna had been almost too good to you. She really really needed a break. Especially as the current plan was she’d be helping with the newborn too. Right now you wouldn’t have wished a baby on yourself - never mind your best mate.

“Okay, get ready then babe - but do it slowly, leave him waiting outside in the cold for as long as possible.”

“Obviously.” You laughed, hauling yourself out of bed, where she gave you one more encouraging hug before leaving.

After hearing Yamna leave, and brushing your hair and throwing on a new pair of trakkies and hoodie, you slowly walked towards the door. It felt as though impending doom were on the other side and every fibre of you wanted to scream and run the other way. But it just had to happen at some point. Why not now?

With a final sharp exhale, attempting to pull yourself together, you opened the door. Immediately your heart sank, seeing nothing. Had you really been that long? And even so, was a 10 minute wait enough for him to give up? You could already feel the hormonal pregnancy tears starting to spring, when a grunt drew your attention.

What you hadn’t considered was the fact Tom was ready to camp out, sitting on the floor beside your door. Springing to his feet, he seemed shocked you’d actually opened the door - makes two of you. When Yamna left she had told him you were coming, but seeing really is believing.

“Y/n! I-I… I wasn’t sure you were ever going to answer.”

“You and me both.” You replied dryly, still leaning on the door. “Do you er…. do you want to come in?” Again he seemed shocked, as though he wasn’t sure you meant it.

“Is that-that okay?” Shrugging you just nodded, stepping back so he could get in. He did pay half the mortgage afterall.

“You want a drink?” He quickly declined your offer, not vocally but instead rushing past you to the kitchen and turning the kettle on himself.

“Your the pregnant one. Go chill on the sofa, I’ll bring you a cuppa.”

And a bit taken a back by his forcefulness you followed instructions, from the sofa watching how effortlessly he danced round the kitchen. It wasn’t shocking, it was technically his kitchen too. But seeing him there felt so alien, almost transporting you back to much much simpler times. Seemed a lifetime ago.

After a couple of minutes, he rounded the sofa with a hot chocolate in one hand for you (because caffiene is bad for the baby) and a cup of Yorkshire tea in the other.

“So… how have you been?”

“Ate a lot of ben and jerrys” You answered without really answering, except he knew you all too well.

“That bad?” He sighed, scrubbing a hand over his brow “how about the baby?”

“I don’t tend to carry an ultrasound on me but she’s been keeping me up all night kicking - so normal I guess.”

“Thats good” He spoke before realising what he said. “Sorry no I um-I don’t mean it like that!” You all but laughed in the face of his flusteredness, only making the tips of his ears go pinker.

“I assume you had something to say and that you came here for a reason rather than just pity me?”

“I want to make things right Y/n - I-I mean your having my kid.”

“OUR kid”

“ Exactly! And-and I love you too and-“

“Bullshit” You may have murmured it under your breath but you had intended for him to hear.

“Oh come one Y/n, you know that!”

It was like the man was asking to be yelled at.

“Don’t sit there trying to patronise me! I THOUGHT i knew it but then I saw you all over another girl. So yes, I’m calling bullshit.”

“Ugh I… If your not going to even try to hear me out then…”

“Then what Tom? You gonna kick me out. I mean this is your flat after all! Maybe you’d like to dump the mother of your unborn child homeless on the street and forget about us - how’d that sound? I’m sure your fans would blindly applaud you.”

“Listen! Please would you just listen to me.” His voice was loud and tone harsh, making you flinch a little. Not because you were ever worried he’d hurt you - but how this wave of uncomfort shuddered through your body, baby even squirming in discontent. So focused on that you just nodded, shifting back into the sofa.

Tom had noticed your reaction and seeing you seemingly scared of him like that, well it broke his heart. Even more.

“Sorry I didn’t mean to shout, I just…. I really need to try and fix this.” He leaned closer, letting out a thankful breath when you just nodded, as if to say go on.

“I’ve really really missed you… these past couple of weeks I’ve never felt so gulity in my life. Not because of what I did! Well yeh that but-but more how much it hurt you and-“

“Fuck.”

You couldn’t help but let out that little curse of pain as a new wave of pain, which seemed to originate from your lower back, shuddered through you. Tom looked up from where his eyes had been nervously wringing his palms whilst he spoke. Rubbing a hand over your belly you shook your head and motioned for him to continue.

She was just kicking really really hard. Right?

“Uhm yeh so I just wanted to properly tell you everything that happened that night so at least we are on the same page? A-And I’m not going to try and use this an excuse but I had been drinking so-“

Seemingly baby disliked the end of that sentence too, causing another rippling wave to echo through your body, feeling as though a band was pressing tightly round your stomach. With another small curse it forced you to stand up, in the hope that’d ease her. Clearly she was as done with his shit as you were.

“Need a water.” You muttered, already waddling to the kitchen, where you heard Tom follow you immediately - like an inpatient dog.

“Y/n sit down I can-“

He was silenced by you freezing and grabbing his arm tightly - a physical contact he hadn’t been expecting from you.

“Tom… get your phone.” You spoke slowly, still not having dared to have moved an inch - fingers almost white from how tightly you were squeezing his forearm.

“Wha-are you-are you okay?”

“I think my waters just broke. Get the phone. Now.”

~~~ feedback is really appreciated + would love to know what u think as still in the process of writing so can be guided / helped by asks !!! ~~~

taglist: @maraudersandco @@minejungwoo @sippin-on-tea @thegirlintheswivelchair @lovehollandy12 @hollandlover19 @thefernandasantana @hunnybunimdun @hallecarey1@cedricdiggorysimpp @msmimimerton @hollandfanficlove @pandaxnienke @crossyourpeter @thegirlwiththeimpala @tom-softie @sunwardsss @spiitfiiires @radcloudenthusiast @ladykxxx08 @prancerrparkerr @wildxwidow @arctic-monkcys @ownbauer13 @tomhollandlol @marvelsbitch8 @peterr-parkourr @lizzyclifford13-blog @user1683 @elishi03

[emu-lumberjack]

Don’t Answer the Phone tired Part 3

Damian’s left at the mercy of his brothers, and he really needs to start paying attention.

-----------------------------

Hi guys, I’ve had probably too much caffiene late at night but heres the next part to Don’t Answer the Phone Tired. Some backstory and croissants are in order. I promise next time more Marinette. also as a side note, the Kipo soundtrack is amazing to write too. 

Part one

Part two

Part four

part five

“Since you pricks are insistent on being social, tell me how Gotham is.” Damian asked his brothers, downing a swig of coffee.

“Oh you know dark, gloomy, and full of rouges.” Dick said “But enough about Gotham. Tell us about Paris, specifically a special somebody.”

“No.” The voice he used was cold and curt. “Where do you want to eat.”

“I think there's a bakery nearby.” Jason said with a grin, the exhausted Damian didn’t put two and two together until they were at the door of the Dupain-Cheng bakery. “Shit.” Damian turned around to leave, only for Jason to pick him by his hood and look him straight in the eyes.

“Now listen here Demon spawn. We’re hungry and poor Timmy over there is freezing cold after the nice little ice bath you gave him.” A glance over to Tim saw the poor boy shivering in his still wet clothes. “So we are gonna go in there and grab some nice warm pastries. Unless there's a reason we shouldn’t, but I couldn’t think of one could you?” Damian silently cursed his mother for teaching Jason to be such an ass, more so than he normally was. He kept his mouth shut knowing it would be worse for him to say that this was Marinette's bakery.

The party walked there normal mismatch of aesthetics. The bakery smelled like warm bread and freshly baked cookies. Like Marinette. It was enough for Damian to temporarily relax and let loose a breath he’d been holding for the last hour. This change in demeanor wasn’t missed by Dick but the elder boy chose not to comment.

“Hello and welcome to the Dupain-Cheng Bake…… Oh Damian it’s you. Wait, why aren’t you at school? Is Marinette alright?” Sabine came out from behind the counter, turning off her customer service voice the minute she saw it was Damian.

“Yes Sabine she’s completely fine. In fact she made sure I got up in time.” He motioned with his coffee mug. “A real lifesaver. The reason I’m not there now is because my brothers decided they just needed to come visit me in Paris so my dad called me out for the day.” Sabiene looked at the 3 other men in the room before responding,

“Oh how delightful, you never speak of your family. I was starting to think you just hatched out of an egg somewhere.” A snicker from the boys in the back, “well no matter we must sit down and talk, I’d love to get to know them!” it was then that she noticed Tim in all of his drenched glory, “I can also lend you some of Tom’s old clothes while yours dry.”

“Oh if that wouldn’t be too much of a bother, someone thought they were funny and tried to get me up in a not so polite manner.” He glared at Damian, the latter pointedly ignoring him.

Sabine caught on to his meaning quickly and stifled a laugh “Oh it's no problem at all, they might be a bit big though.”

Ten minutes later they were situated around the table on the upper level, hot coffee in front of Jason, Tim, and Damian while Sabine and Dick both had tea. The boys had chosen different pastries. Dick went with a blueberry scone, Tim who was now sitting in a much too big white shirt and comically oversized pants for his frame had a classic butter croissant and Jason went with a pain au lait. Damian having already eaten just sat sipping his coffee.

“So Ms. Dupain-Cheng..” Dick Began.

“Oh please just call me Sabiene” She interrupted.

“Alright Sabine, Damian’s been less than forthcoming about his time here in Paris, would you be able to fill in some gaps? Like how he and Marinette met.” Damian kicked Dick from underneath the table.

“Oh I’d be happy too! It’s actually a rather cute story. Damian had just moved to Paris and was having trouble making any friends, Marinette had taken note of that and asked me and Tom, he’s my husband you’d meet him but he’s out of town right now, so she asked Tom and me to help make this boy in her class some macaroons to help him get more accustomed to Paris. We thought to remind him of Gotham so we made them Batman and Robin themed. We actually probably have a picture of them around here somewhere.” She mumbled the last bit to herself as Damian steadily slunk down in his chair attempting to hide from looks his brothers would throw his way. “Well anyway the next day they were in class, and since they sat next to each other she tried to offer him the macaroons then, but Damian being Damian didn’t want to take them. Something about not liking sweets. Instead of shying away she just split one in half and asked him to just try that.”

“I can take it from here Sabine.” Damian's voice surprised even him, but the boy knew what was coming next and it would be less embarrassing if he said it.

“Of course, you were there so you probably know it better anyway.”

Three predatory gazes settled on Damian taking note of everything he said to rely to Bruce, Damian took a breath and continued, “I took the half she offered me out of politeness, after all Sabine you and Tom worked very hard on them. They were probably some of the best Macaroons I’d ever had. Marinette left the box between the two of us on our desk and went back to her school work. When she wasn’t looking I took another one, I hadn’t eaten breakfast and it was a very nice gesture.” Damian looked up to see Dick holding his hand over his mouth, concealing a squeal most likely. Todd was looking at him with laughter in his eyes, and even Drake had a shit-eating grin on his face. “Anyway I ended up eating the entire thing, after class Marinette and I started talking more, and eventually we just ended up hanging out outside of class playing video games and the like.”

“Oh my Gosh that is so adorable.” Grayson was the first to speak after Damian finished. “Damian I never knew you could be so… so…”

“Nice?” Tim supplied.

“Yes nice!”

“I’m mainly focusing on the fact that Damian was kind enough to actually have her keep up conversation after the first one.” Jason was looking at Damian incredulously.

“Ah I see his prickly attitude is not a recent development.” Sabine said, taking a sip of her tea.

“That would be an understatement. Although believe it or not he’s actually a lot better then when we first met him.” Dick said politely.

The five of them sat quietly trading stories of Gotham and Paris, Damian firmly keeping them off the topic of him and Marinette. Cups of tea and coffee came and went until a cheerful voice called from the foyer “Mamman I’m home!” Damian immediately sprinted downstairs and tackled Marinette in a bearhug.

“Please never leave me alone with them again.”

She just laughed and said “Was it really that bad Dames?” Tim who had just walked downstairs startled chuckling.

“What’s so funny Drake?” Damian said icily.

“The fact she called you Dames! Last time I think someone tried to do that you had a katana at their throat and they were found hanging upside down from one of the gargoyles at Gotham academy.”

“Did you seriously do that Damian?” Marinette focused her gaze on him.

“Ok in my defense it’s also because he wouldn’t stop coming onto me even though I had said no. I mean he wasn’t even my type.”

“Oh and what is your type then?” She asked.

“Blue hair with gorgeous blue eyes. A complete klutz half the time, while still somehow managing to keep seven layer cakes from falling down. Someone who will draw and sketch to their heart's content, while simultaneously dealing with a dumbass. Also doesn’t hurt if they can make the most beautiful clothes.” He planted a small kiss on Marinette's cheek just to emphasize.

“Seriously, how did you do that.” Tim’s voice cut through the moment, Damian turned towards him annoyed.

“Now that is a story for after lunch. How bout we go grab some sushi and we’ll tell you.”

Not again.

Tag list (I’m assuming if you wanted to be tagged in part two you want to be tagged here, if not: welp you are anyway): 

@ur-average-reader @kristycocopop @k-laconia-bug1 @smolplantmum @dast218 @pirats-pizzacanninibles @acoursedprophetwithasmothie @g-arya @loysydark @mewwitch @itsemeanne @hauntedstudent99 @shippernaturalsanderspjoandscifi @purplesundaze

general writing tag: 

@clumsy-owl-4178

[forever-rogue]

THIS THE DUMBEST MF REQUEST U EVER HEARD BUT IM ON MY PERIOD AND I HAVE TO TAKE MEDS BC CHRONIC CRAMPS ANS ITS GIT SO MUCH MF CAFFIENE AND IM FUCKING TRIPPING RN AND FOR SOME DUMBASS REASON I NEED DIN X READER WHERE READER TAKES MEDS AND GOES BATSHIT CRAZY LITERALLY IM SHAKING SO MUCH WOEOWOW SORRY THIS IS ACTUALLY SOME TH IFN IM ASKING FOR YOURE GRET!!

Hi friend, I hope you’re okay now and feeling better! Din blurb? Din blurb. Enjoy! Thank you @rosetophighlander for providing some much needed inspo!

Mandalorian Masterlist

»»————-　♡　————-««

When it came to your least favorite time of the month, you were normally able to handle it...for the most part. It’d been a routine that you’d been going through for what seemed like eons, but some months were worse than others. This was one of those times; not just one of those times, but also the first time you’d had this much pain around your Mandalorian companion.

The morning had gone fairly well, you’d made sure to stay hydrated and eaten a decent breakfast, along with your small green friend, but why the time the afternoon started, your insides were in utter turmoil. You thought you were doing a fairly good job of keeping a neutral face and hiding it. Until...

“What’s wrong?” Din’s gaze was trained on as you sat in the co-pilot’s seat, hand on your stomach and a contorted look on your face. So much for handling it well...but it was hard when it felt like your innards were being eaten.

“N-nothing,” you lied, biting the inside of your cheek as another wave of cramps rolled over you. You should have known better than to lie to him. He was a trained bounty hunter, years of practice had made it easy for him to read just about anyone.

“Why are you lying?” he asked and you just sigh and let your head flop to the side, letting out an exasperation groan.

“Period,” you finally said through gritted teeth as you pointedly avoided looking at him, “I’m on my period.”

“Oh,” he sounded almost nervous but just awkwardly cleared his throat. He wasn’t inept when it came to a woman’s body, but it had been some time since he’d experienced being with a woman during her time of the month. You just nodded and a waved a hand in his general direction, “is there...”

“No,” you said quietly, hoping that if you remained seated and still that the pain would dull and pass quickly. Din stood up after a few more moments of watching you silently struggled with the waves of pain, disappearing without a word. Maybe you’d scared him off?

But no - he was back within a few minutes, handing you a big glass of water, followed by a few pills that you didn’t recognize. You didn’t even bother to ask what they were, or what their origins were, but you quickly swallowed them and down the glass of water.

“That should help,” he said softly and you nodded, giving him a thankful smile, “maybe you should...take a nap.”

“I’m not tired though,” you insisted, knowing the tiredness that always accompanied this time of month could come later in the afternoon. It always did, like clockwork.

“You’ll...just trust me,” he insisted, nudging his head in the direction of the your shared sleeping space, “you’ll want to sleep. It might be...just take a nap.”

“Oh...kay,” you shrugged and decided to oblige him, slowly clambering out of spot and heading for your cot. You might have been going crazy...but did you already feel better? Din wasn’t normally so cryptic or weird, but you weren’t to question him. Besides, maybe a nap would be nice...

»»————-　♡　————-««

Once you’d slipped into your cot, it took only a few minutes until you gave into the soft pull of sleep. If you’d been awake, it would have surprised you, but instead you were quickly snoring...and loudly.

But then...almost as quickly as you feel asleep, you were wide awake again. Your eyes snapped open as you felt a rush of energy running through your veins...you felt more awake than you possibly ever had. But your pain was gone, instead you felt nothing but pure adrenaline pumping through your body.

“Din,” you almost shouted, as you jumped up and ran to find him. When you didn’t spot him anywhere on your floor, you climbed up the cockpit and found him there, playing with the Child, “Din!”

A small, quiet oh no spilled from his lips as you almost barreled him over in your attempt to sit down in your normal spot. He had hoped this wouldn’t happen, it was a risk he was taking...but alas. Your eyes were wide as you sat down and stared at him, speaking so fast that he wasn’t able to catch more than a word here and there. Part of him wondered if you were even speaking Basic anymore.

“andidon’tevenknowwhatyougavemebutifeelsoalive,” you jumped up again, peeking outside, studying the dying light of day. Maybe you could go out and explore for a awhile. Just as you started walking off again, Din grabbed your arm and keep you from walking away, “what?”

“I think you need to stay inside and sit with me,” he felt bad that you’d had such a reaction to the pills he gave you, but couldn’t deny that he was little amuse, “it’ll pass soon, but I need to keep an eye on you to make sure you don’t hurt yourself.”

“I’ll be fine,” you insisted, bouncing on your heels as he kept you restrained, “I just want to go and explore!”

“Cyare...no, just say with me please,” he insisted softly, “but are you...feeling better?”

“There’s no pain,” you promised, “I just feel so...alive! Have you ever heard colors before? I’m pretty sure I’m can hear them!”

“Kriff,” he sighed lightly to himself.

“What even was that stuff?!” you asked as you pulled free from his hold on you and started to dance around the open space, “I love it! I feel so alive!”

“Painkillers,” he admitted honestly, letting the Child down to try and get you in his arms again so you wouldn’t hurt anyone...namely yourself, “apparently much more potent for someone of your size.”

“We should get more of that stuff! We should go to the market and buy some,” you grabbed his hand and started to dance with him, finding it hard to get the large man to move along with you, “you should take some too! Maker, can you imagine how much we could if we don’t have to sleep and we just play?!”

“You can’t buy this stuff at the market,” in order to give you some reprieve, he gave in and danced with you, letting you guide him around the open space.

“Where then!? We have to go!”

“It’s not exactly...legal,” he confessed the last part quietly, but you were so hyper-aware of everything that you picked up on it. You shrugged it off regardless, “I probably shouldn’t have given it you. I should have known better...”

“No, this is great,” you insisted, stopping and put your hands on his shoulders, “I’ve never felt so...amazing! I feel like I can do anything!”

“Yeah...that’s one of the effects,” he cursed himself silently. He’d just wanted help you and alleviate your pain, instead he’d created a whole different type of problem, “cyare, why don’t you come with me and we can go lie down.”

“But I don’t wanna,” you pouted at him, but he just hung his head, “I just wanna go outside and be with you!”

The last part tugged on his heartstrings a little bit, and while he was glad you weren’t in pain, he didn’t mean to induce all of this either. At least this way you were enjoying yourself; the grin on your face hadn’t faltered once. He weighed his options for a moment before nodding lightly, “alright. We’ll go outside and explore for a little bit, but if and when you start to feel sleepy or anything else, you let me know, yes?”

“Duh,” you promised him, your eyes glowing with excitement as you leaned up and pressed a kiss to his helmet, where his cheek would be, “we’re gonna have so much fun!”

You leaned down and picked up the Child, carefully as you could in your current state, and Din stopped breathing for a moment. He knew you’d never do anything to hurt him, but in your haze, he was mildly concerned. But you were still so gentle with him, making sure he held tightly against your chest before descending the latter to go downstairs.

“Come on, slow poke!” you called to him as he listened to your footsteps running out of the ship. He sighed lightly, almost in amusement as he quickly followed after you.

He had a feeling you weren’t going to be the only exhausted by the time you were coming down from your high. At least he knew better for next time: half dose...or perhaps something more legal...either way, he vowed to make sure to take care of you.

[5-falsehoods-phonated]

This story takes place during the Sanders Asides Are There Healthy Distractions Episodes, suggested by @heavy-metal-papillon . The idea comes from Logan voicing Deciets line when he pops up to grab his hat from Logan, so in this story Deciet and Logan switched places in the episode.

Switching Sides

Summary: Logan wants some time to himself and Janus wants to enjoy a movie with the other sides in peace. They support and respect eachothers wants and needs, agreeing to switch places for movie night. In doing so, they both gained a bit more than they bargained for.

Warnings: none, but if you see any just say something!

Ships: platonic Lociet, past platonic Anciet

WC: 2, 305

Janus adjusted the his tie one final time, giving himself a once over in the mirror. His hair was combed back smartly, hat tucked away safely in his room for the time being. He had gotten the type right this time, and the white embroidered brain logo stood out against the plain black polo. The stiff dark Jean's were a little uncomfortable but the dress shoes fit nicely so he couldn't complain too much. This had to be perfect, even if it was a somewhat casual setting, he couldn't afford to-

"You know you could've just asked."

Yelping, he whirled around to face the real logical side currently sizing him up with a less than impressed expression. "We aren't discussing anything important today, why are you replacing me again?"

Janus sputtered. "I wasn't!"

Logan's eyebrow raised even more. "So my choice of clothing is just that comfortable, right down to the glasses?"

"...yes."

"Janus."

The deceitful side snapped his head up to glare at the other. "Not so loud! You dont know if one of the others would hear!"

Logan cleared his throat. "No one is left in the mind scape currently except us. Even Remus is currently hiding behind the couch. I assure you no one will overhear us, though of course I will call you Deciet if that would make you more comfortable."

Narrowing his eyes, Janus took a careful step back. "Why aren't you angry at me?"

Logan shrugged. "Why are you disguising yourself to simply watch a movie?"

"Because I-well in case...just in case something comes up that....hes using this to distract himself and that's sort of like lying to yourself so it stands to reason i would want to be there." Satisfied with jus excuse he glared at the other, daring him to argue.

But Logan simply nodded. "I've been meaning to get more work done anyway and would rather do that than watch Roman rig the vote multiple times only to complain about the plot of the movie he picked out. Straighten the tie and be careful."

"Just...just like that? You don't even care?"

"I require time to....gather my thoughts, after the more recent dilemmas Thomas seems insistant on making harder than they should be. Peace and quiet would be nice right now and if you're willing to take my place then I wont argue." Nodding more to himself, Logan reached out to hand him a thermos. "Caffiene helps stave off the inevitable headache. I highly recommend it."

Dumbfounded, Janjs could only clutch the thermos go his chest as he watched the logical trait walk back to his room and quietly shut the door behind him. Something he couldn't quite identify tugged in his chest but he brushed it off quickly and sunk down to the apartment below.

Patton was the first to notice him as he settled down stiffly on the couch, waving excitedly and almost spilling what looked like cocoa all over the floor in the process. Nodding he looked up as Roman began to speak.

"Finally! Now that we have our resident nerd here we can vote." Janus watched curiously as little slips of paper were passed around, narrowing his eyes at the clump that Roman hid in his sleeve but decided not to say anything. He looked over as Thomas cleared his throat, taking the paper offered to him with an excited smile which he quickly dropped in favor of Logans usual impassive expression. He didnt expect to win the vote, but maybe since it was movie night they'd watch all the suggested films to make it fair. He didnt really know how this was supposed to work, Remus and....well, nobody ever watched movies together in the part of the mind he resided in.

Quickly jotting down his selection he waited rather impatiently for the rest to finish, gripping the paper tightly as a hat was passed around.

Wait.

He could only stare as the collection hat got to him. How had they gotten his hat? When did they even get it?....How often did they sneak into his room without him knowing? He wanted so badly to yell, take his hat and sink out, but that wasnt who he was right now.

"Hey L, you good?"

His head snapped up so fast he felt his neck creak. Virgil had never....not for a long time....that tone of voice wasn't for him. Virgil stayed with the "light sides" now, he only showed concern for them. Swallowing around the lump in his throat he reluctantly handed the hat back to Thomas to give back to Roman.

"I'm adequate thank you."

His hand shook slightly as he raised the thermos of coffee to his lips, but if Virgil noticed he didn't say anything.

Swinging his attention back to the current conversation he caught Pattons response to whatever had been said. "...voted for Frozen Roman but I'm still rooting for-"

"Oh my gosh! One hundred percent of the votes went to Frozen!"

He scowled as Patton cheered. "No, fu - falsehood, I did not vote for Frozen!"

"You didn't get a vote because you didnt wear a onesie!"

Taking a preemptive swig of coffee, he mumbled out, "I don't wear those anymore, they're too childish."

"No onesie, no vote, like our founding fathers believed!"

Janus snorted quietly, covering it up with an exasperated sigh as he settled more into couch. While the movie was being set up he glared again at the stolen hat on the floor, bringing out his phone discreetly.

Dee: I know I don't have much right to ask you this, but might I request a favor?

Logan: I assure you it's fine. What do you need?

Surprised at the quick response he continued to type, glancing up every now and again to be sure no one noticed his silence.

Dee: Roman stole my hat somehow, I was wondering if it would be possible cor you to get it back? I know you don't like shifting but I'm not sure how discreet it would be for me to try and get it as you.

Logan: It isn't that I don't like it, I'm just not equipped to be good at it. It does not make logical sense to disguise oneself, therefore I am at a disadvantage when it comes to such things. However, I can replicate your scales if I may have permission to 'raid your wardrobe' so to speak. Only with your permission of course.

Dee: Thank you and it's fine. Just dont go snooping around. You may not like what you find.

Logan: I will not. I have no reason to do anything other than procur clothing and so that is all I will do.

Sighing in relief, Janus settled back somewhat comfortably to watch the movie, letting the other sides' idle chatter wash over him.

----

"Fear will be your enemy."

Janus snuck a glance at Virgil at this line, glancing back away quickly at the look of panic that flashed across the anxious sides face. He wondered if Virgil would ever open up about his true nature....though perhaps until things truly calmed down it was for the best he remained determined to be closed off.

----

He nearly jumped out of his skin as Remus popped up suddenly behind him, clapping his hands at the prospect of Anna and Elsa's parents dying at sea, seemingly completely naked and comfortable enough to showcase go the entire living room. Janus shot him a warning look as Remus peered at him curiously, thanking God that for once Remus seemed content to keep his mouth shut.

----

"Wait, Hans is tricking Anna making her believe hes in love with her, but shes not around...why make that face?" He had watched the movie before of course but now that he had people to discuss it with that weren't making sexual innuendos every other sentence he felt much more comfortable speaking out.

"Yeah your right...."

Janus promptly turned out the rest of Roman's sentence, discreetly entering the date into his phone that Roman had admitted he was right in something, even if he didnt know who he was speaking to.

----

"Do you think this place has a lavatory?"

"Ice toilet!" Patton giggled.

"Or a bed?" Roman countered.

"Ice bed!"

"This place sounds awful." His nature made his blood run colder than normal anyway and the thought of sleeping on a freezing cold bed on top of a mountain surrounded by walls of ice made him very much wish he had in fact worn his onesie.

----

Janus chugged another mouthful of coffee in irritation. "You meddled with the vote to ensure we would watch this and yet you're the one constantly making fun of it."

"Look, this is how I show my love!"

Janus rolled his eyes and settled back into the couch wondering if Roman showed his love this way with the others just as much as he did with his beloved disney films.

----

Janus watched as Virgil voiced his thoughts on the matter that had made them all plan this movie night in the first place. A familiar kind of second hand hurt tugged in his chest while the others' thoughts spiraled further and further, unconsciously blanketing the room with an ever more suffocating blanket of anxiety. He watched as Roman grimaced from across the room, Patton fidgeting in place and gripping his mug ever harder and Thomas dragging fingers through messy hair as Virgil only continued talking faster and faster, becoming more and more worked up as the literal word vomit consumed any rational thoughts left in the room.

"Thomas, Virgil?" He waited calmly as Thomas peeked out from his hands and Virgils panicked face snapped towards him. Pushing down the old familiarity he continued on. "Please do me a favor and name me five things that you can see."

"Staircase." Thomas sighed.

"Impending doom." Virgil quickly countered.

"Olaf."

"A future without friends."

"Lamp!"

"Blinds."

"Pants."

"Now four things you can feel."

"Pants."

"A bad feeling."

"The couch."

"Wall."

"Hair."

"Three you can hear." He smiled in relief as Virgil began to participate more, visibly calming as his mind was brought back to the present.

"Olaf."

"The fan."

"The ice machine for some reason."

Thomas really needed to fix his appliances. "Two things can smell."

"Clean shirt."

"The deodorant Thomas put on because....he was gonna go out tonight."

"And one thing you can taste."

"A sour taste in my mouth probably leftover from those reheated tai noodle leftovers."

Both variably more calm, Janus tried gently explaining the technique he had used, though he knew they both already knew it seemed like a good idea to remind them that they were allowed to use the technique whenever they needed it.

"Thank you, Logan." Thomas breathed out as he leaned forward tiredly.

Janus smiled, going to take another swig of his dwindling coffee when he caught site of a figure dressed in black and yellow on the stairs, nobody having noticed his presence yet.

Allowing himself a smirk behind the thermos, he responded. "No problem. Just your cool teacher being his cool self."

He smiled slightly wider as he heard a quiet scoff from the figure, just loud enough that he could hear it. He hoped Logan didn't think he was making fun of him, this was a rare day where he hadn't lied once around the others.

----

Logan settled quietly on the stairs til the end of the movie, seeming content to join them quietly until Roman brought Janus' hat back out.

After they had discussed the movie's ending, with Virgils anxious thoughts still persisting, he realized they needed to do something else that more actively distracted them all from the situation. As Roman brought out his hat to vote on another activity Logan stepped in quickly, Virgil hissing at him much to Janus' amusement while Logan snatched his hat back without a glance in his direction.

"I was looking for this! Don't touch my shit!" Janus bit his lip hard to keep from busting out laughing at the reality of Logan swearing at Roman for him, a warm feeling enveloping him as the others continued with whatever conversgion they had moved on to. His focus came back as the ending of some kind of Frozen fix it fanfiction was being discussed, making it very hard not to feel smug as his suggested was acted upon and Thomas definitely seemed happier than he had previously. Not being needed for whatever ridiculous story was sure go come out he sunk back down into the mind scape, startling slightly when he appeared right next to Logan who was currently fixing a spare tie as he left Janus' room.

"Ah, you're back. I left your hat on the bedside where I assume it was taken in the first place. I'm the future know that with a little concentration we are able to keep certain sides out of our rooms. I would suggest you utilize this to prevent future thievery."

Janus shook off his disguise and held out the stolen tie. "Thank you...for letting me, well you didn't have to allow me to ho in your stead. I....appreciate the trust."

"Keep it." Logan gestured to the tie before turning away. "Just in case."

Janjs watched in confusion as Logan returned to his room to lock himself away again, finally sighing and turning to his own. Smiling a little he laid the tie carefully in a drawer before plunking his hat back on his head, shoulders sagging in relief at the familiarity.

It was nice to pretend to be someone else and talk with fake friends. But maybe, in allowing himself vulnerability, he had found himself another real one.

This work is also available on AO3!

[normallee]

Furious Coffae || Tasmyn and Norma

TIMING: Current LOCATION: Coffee Plus PARTIES: @tasmyn-pearce and @normallee SUMMARY: Norma goes to get her “caffiene hit” as she’s told people do and makes new friends with a certain spriggan.

Coffee was such a human invention. They were so bland and boring, of course they were tired all the time. As much as Tasmyn hated to admit it though, it was wicked delicious. She had over time become very intrigued how different countries across Europe made coffee. She liked the fancy sweet ones the best. And the iced ones. And while she didn’t need coffee to keep her energy up, she did have one nearly every day. Today, when she arrived at Coffee Plus she noticed that the line was impossibly long. She sighed heavily as she got into the back of the line. If she hadn’t already set her heart on having a nice iced caramel frappuccino today she would have just left. Reluctantly, she decided that she would have to just wait for her turn to order. After all, that’s what humans expected people to do in situations like this.

Coffee culture seemed like a cult to Norma. She rather enjoyed cults, they brought so much controversy with them. They were such easy feeding grounds. While she wasn’t currently looking for a platform to work her magic, unfortunately, she was looking to blend in with mortals and they all seemed to enjoy this Coffee Plus location. She was no stranger to the dark, bitter liquid, it had been around for centuries now, but the pervasiveness of these cafes with complicated orders were a relatively new phenomenon that she didn’t fully understand. However,if she wanted to appear human, what better way than with a status symbol in the form of a small paper cup? As Norma walked directly to the counter, she wondered if any actual essence of a man named Joe was in the beverage she was about to order. That made it sound much more appealing to her. “One cup of Joe, please. Not John, he sounds less pleasant,” she told the cashier.

As Tasmyn patiently waited her turn she spotted a rather lovely looking woman walk into the cafe, ignore the line completely, and walk right up to the corner to place her order. She was both wildly impressed and disappointed in herself for not thinking to do such a thing herself. Sure, humans got controlling over their coffee. But for the most part, Tasmyn had always found them to be quite passive. She was quite curious to see how this was going to go, so she abandoned her spot in line and moved closer to the woman who had, very specifically, ordered some Joe. “Have you ever tried the blended iced coffees? They take all the bitterness out and replace it with sweetness!” She offered, offhandedly to the other woman. Admittedly, she was hoping to hop in on the swift ordering, but she wouldn’t be disappointed if that didn’t end up happening.

Norma was startled that someone else in the shop had spoken to her that was not an employee. And in a pleasant tone at that! So often humans were groggy and grumpy while waiting in cafes. In fact, most of the people standing behind them were exactly that and were grumbling as well. “A blended ice coffee? No I haven’t!” Norma turned to the cashier and said, “I would like one of those! Oh, actually, two of those. For the suggestion.” Norma gave the brunette a smile. “I’m Norma, it’s nice to meet you.” Before she could get a reply, another customer came up to them. “Um, excuse you,” the blonde behind her said. She looked rather perturbed. Norma couldn’t figure out why. Maybe she was a John fan. “Oh yes, I apologize, I should have said excuse me. Excuse me! Thank you!” Norma told her. She turned back to her newest colleague. “You don’t know her, right?”

Tasmyn had a good feeling about this woman. Not only did she take her suggestion with a smile, but she had also ordered her a drink as well. Finally, a human in this town who got it. Or, well, at least a not-fae. She had been mistakenly presuming all people who weren’t fae were human in this town, and rather quickly she was discovering how not true those assumptions were. “You’ll love it! Unless you don’t like sweet things. But? Who doesn’t like sweet things? I haven’t ever met someone who said ‘no thank you, that’s too sweet!’” To think she had almost decided not to come into the cafe today. “I’m Tasmyn! You have such a lovely name, Norma.” She huffed in slight annoyance when the woman who had previously been first in line said something to her new friend, Norma. “What’s that expression you american’s love? You snooze, you lose? You can get your coffee next.” People were so rude sometimes. “No, very thankfully I do not know that woman.”

Norma wasn’t sure how she felt about sweet things, at least not sweet coffee. It seemed a bit like an oxymoron. But she was certain she would find out! “It’s very nice to meet you, Tasmyn! I enjoy your clever comebacks and I’m very glad you don’t associate with this woman.” Norma leaned in to whisper, though not very quietly, “She seems very angry.” The blonde gave an offended huff and it delighted Norma, truly. “Here is my payment, cash man. Please take it and bring us the coffee,” she said, turning back to the cashier who seemed flustered, but ultimately decided it was best to just go with the flow and not argue with her.

“Hey, what’s going on up there?!” a man a little farther back questioned. A few others chimed in and Norma could feel the anger and hostility brewing within them, deep and dark like the liquid pouring out from the metal machines nearby. She wanted to drink it down and feel it filling her with energy. “These two cleary don’t know what a line is,” the blonde snipped back, eyes glaring daggers into them both. It brought a smile to Norma’s face. It was nowhere near as satisfying as using her powers properly, it wasn’t the full unfiltered chaos she craved. But maybe, she could reach out. It was right there, right at her finger tips. The strife and anguish she could stir up so easily. Her hand hovered in front of her, daring her to touch the blonde and whisper in her ear. But she stopped, clenched her hand and dropped it away, pulling Tasmyn along with her instead to wait for the coffee, away from temptation. “I heard it comes out over here. We should follow the silly hu-- I mean, the rules. Just the rules.”

For the first time ever, Tasmyn was genuinely surprised that she didn’t sense any fae in this woman. But she had such a good energy about her, and everything she was saying made perfect sense to her. Yet, she wasn’t fae. There was no way she could be human… could she? Were humans capable of being this awesome? Unlikely. Especially when she saw her listening to the people in line complain. She was just as entertaining as Tasmyn was. Which made sense, the people in line were clearly just embarrassed they didn’t think to do this themselves. Without hesitation, she followed Norma as she pulled her along away from the register. “Have you never been here before?” Tasmyn shrugged at her second comment, “Rules are so boring. So constricting.” Maybe it was because she felt empowered by skipping the line, or maybe it was the mushrooms calling her name in the distance, but she decided to take the next drink that was placed down on the counter for pick up. The barista placed it down, announced a large mocha latte for ‘Megan’, and Tasmyn just swooped in and collected it off the counter and brought the hot beverage to her lips. “Oooh, that’s better than I thought it was going to be!” She announced to her new friend with a smile.

“No, I haven’t! I have been to Coffee Plus Plus, though! They’re far slower over there. The service here is so speedy! I very much enjoy it more.” Norma could feel the ire of everyone in line growing. God it was delicious, if only she could stir the pot a little bit more. Her head snapped back to Tasmyn as she mentioned rules. “Oh yes, they are. But it’s fun to watch them bend and break as it were. But I do try my best to be a law abiding citizen and American. For the record!” Her lips pursed in a moment of confusion. Norma had lived far too long to care too much about committing things to memory, it turned out most facts were in fact useless, but she was fairly certain her new friend was named Tasmyn. She had recalled that correctly, hadn’t she? Megan sounded similar to a point. Maybe she had heard it incorrectly. “Is your name also Megan? Or does it just not matter what name you give them?” Before awaiting a proper answer, the barista called out a drink for a “Karen.” Norma did the exact same as Tasmyn and grabbed the drink in question with a quick thanks. She took a sip and… “Ugh,” she exclaimed, making a face as the bitterness and artificial flavors met her tongue. “Is this a cherry flavored coffee? Gross! Who does that?” Norma put the cup back down on the counter and slid it back to the barista. “Please try again, thank you.” From the side, a woman with a rather unfortunate haircut practically screeched. “That was mine!” she said, huffing and puffing. “Do you think steam could actually come out of her ears?” she asked Tasmyn in what she thought might be a whisper.

Since moving to town, Tasmyn had a hard time finding people with a similar outlook on life. But Norma seemed to get it. “Well, I’m not a citizen nor an American, but I suppose there's nothing wrong with trying to abide by the laws.” Asshe took another sip of her stolen drink, she could hear a woman, presumably Megan, complaining to one of the employees. “Yes! She just took my coffee, the one I paid for. Now I’m going to be late for work!” It made Tasmyn chuckle a little, the human reliance on coffee being their own downfall was quite entertaining. “No, I’m Tasmyn not Megan. But, I don’t think it matters what name you give them? Well, it does as in that’s the name they’ll call out when your drink is ready, but you can tell them your name is anything.” It was becoming clear that not only the customers were mad at the pair of them, but the employees were looking furious too now. Maybe because now they had to re-make the drinks knowing they weren’t getting more money for doing so. Tasmyn sipped again on Megan's drink, noticing that the new drinks coming out weren’t just being placed on the counter in front of them, but held until the actual customer came to claim them. “Oooh! That would be fun! But, I’ve never seen that happen before. Is that something hum- uh, people do?”

Somehow Norma felt as if it should be obvious to her that Tasmyn was not an American but, as it was, she still had no idea how borders worked or why or what they even were anymore. “Interesting. Where are you from? See I’ve been told following the law is the best way to stay out of trouble. Which is obviously something I liked to do.” That was untrue. But for the sake of her safety, she had to try at least. She started tapping her foot while waiting for a non-disgusting coffee, the supposed Megan and Karen glaring at her. Norma simply smiled and gave them a small “polite” wave. It seemed to incense them more. Wonderful. “Someone should really tell them that names are irrelevant in that case. They are very hung up on this.” Norma craned her neck to see if the disgruntled employees were making her new non disgusting drink. She couldn’t tell. But she could tell they were all flustered and grumpy. Her head tilted as she heard a similar tick to her own. The small slip of “hum” before swapping words. Was this simple social mirroring that most humans were prone to? Or did it mean something else? “I have never seen it literally happen to a human, no. Not naturally.Not without a little assistance.” She decided to test the waters, see how it landed. Likely this was not another fury she was speaking to, but there were plenty of options in between.

“Cornwall.” Tasmyn replied simply, her attention turning to the second part of Norma’s statement. “One could argue we’re about to get in trouble right now though. Which, honestly I don’t mind. Trouble is fun sometimes.” Usually Taz was the person in the room most uneducated about human politeness, but she was wondering if maybe she had met her match. “That’s because people are too reliant on their caffeine. So they don’t like us for creating a barrier to it. Because they think these drinks belong to them just because they paid for them. Which is an insane way to think about things.” As she looked around she saw a few of the baristas talking to some woman who was dressed slightly nicer than the other employees but still had a name tag on. Maybe the boss, hmmm… interesting. She presumed they were discussing her and Norma. “Assistance?” Her ears perked up and she returned her attention to her partner in coffee crime. “What kind of assistance?” There was a small smirk that spread across her lips. This woman wasn’t fae, but maybe she wasn’t exactly a human either. “Because, that would make this day far more entertaining…”

Norma nodded, searching her mind for where Cornwall was or could be. It sounded vaguely European, but then again, so did most American locations. Considering how settlement and colonization worked. She considered most of the old names superior but then again, she hardly remembered those anyway. Her head shot towards her new friend at the mention of trouble. “We are?” Her lips pursed as she tried to determine how to proceed. Part of her thought about running away, avoid trouble, but then again, she wasn’t alone in this. Surely between the two of them, they could pass the blame or cause enough confusion to get out of this. Maybe.

“Oh, I see. That makes sense. Though I do suppose a fair exchange of currency for goods is to be expected. Though it seems to be occurring with or without their expected timeliness.” Which, speaking of, she assumed it was her turn fairly soon, but just in case, she started waving at the baristas. Who, at this point, ignored her. How rude. “It looks like you have to wait your turn after all,” the Karen lady snipped. And as if on some sort of cue, the name Norma was called and she swept in to grab her drink. “It seems I do! This is much better, good job, coffee person. This effort is far superior to last time. You should always do this instead.” The barista looked confused but shrugged and went back to steaming milk, surely to take her advice while this Karen steamed herself. “Yes, assistance,” she assured. “I was thinking along the lines of a little… magic,” she added with a smirk. “You know, if one was skilled in that sort of thing. Perhaps?” It was a shame she couldn’t tap into her own store of powers. But it was worth asking if her new found friend was capable of causing enough chaos for them both.

“Just a little bit.” Tasmyn said with a slight shrug of her shoulders. Breaking rules never bothered her, mostly because they usually seemed like stupid ways to make life more difficult than it needed to be. When she heard the bitter coffee woman talk, she turned around towards her and sighed, “Waiting is so stupid. If you just grabbed any drink you could’ve been well on your way to where you need to go by now.” As she turned back she smiled widely at the fact that Norma seemed to be enjoying her coffee suggestion. “Isn’t it so wonderful! Much better than just normal coffee. Normal is boring anyways.” Not long after, the barista placed down Tasmyn’s cup and called out her name. Happily, she snatched it up off the counter and took a big sip of it. “Magic?” She replied, eyes wide and her tone in a soft whisper. She couldn’t tell if this was some sort of test or not. Was she a hunter trying to trap her? Fortunately, the truth wouldn’t really get her into any trouble here. “I’m not personally magically inclined.” Now she was slightly disappointed, it would have been hilarious to see her friend make steam come out of these rude peoples ears. “We should go try to befriend someone who is skilled in magic. That would be fun!”

“Oh yes, it’s wonderful! Definitely better than nor--” Norma’s eyes went wide as she realized what she was about to say. “I mean, there’s nothing wrong with being normal, though, of course. In fact, I consider myself to be perfectly normal. I mean, look at me!” she said, gesturing to herself with a nervous laugh. True, she hated having to be a boring basic human, but it was the safest way. So proving her normalcy and leaning into it was vital to her survival, like it or not. She took another long sip of her drink, hoping it could give her a moment to collect herself, be “normal” again. At least coffee was normal, right? She was well on her way with that alone. “You’re not?” she asked back, a little shocked that the very odd and fun woman she was talking to was somehow not inclined to magic. It seemed unfathomable. She couldn’t possibly be just a human, could she? They weren’t capable of this sort of chaos on their own. “That’s a shame, but yes, we should! I used to know many people who were knee deep in the dark arts. Light, too, but those were less fun. I’m a little bit unable to tap into my own source of power in this town. If you follow.” This was more than she should be telling any stranger, true, but it seemed a risk worth taking. And if things went wrong, well, she was exceptionally hard to kill.

“Normal is a bit boring for my tastes.” Tasmyn responded matter-of-factly. She’d never understand the human fascination with being just like everyone else. Maybe her attempts to live in human towns and try to not draw all that much attention to herself would be easier if she just gave in and tried to be normal. But that simply wasn’t how she wanted to live her life. Generally, Taz was a rather trusting fae. She believed that people were often telling the truth, and maybe that was because she herself couldn’t do anything except tell the truth. While she knew Deirdre had warned her to be careful for hunters, she made the choice to trust her new coffee friend. “I can… do some things that some people might call magic. But, that regrettably does not include making steam come out of human’s heads.” She wasn’t entirely sure what it meant to not be able to access her power in this town. Were there beings that couldn’t do magic in certain places? Or was there some anti-magic hex surrounding the town? “I don’t follow. But it sounds like a very intriguing story!” While she loved making friends of all kinds, mystical and powerful friends were her favorite to make.

It was boring for her tastes, too, but there was no way she would be able to announce that here. “It can be very exciting sometimes, I’m sure,” Norma said, not sure if she was trying hard to convince her new friend or herself. It would be alright. She wouldn’t have to keep up this charade forever, surely. Demons got bored eventually. They’d lift those bounties someday, right? Norma took a sip of her coffee and tired to ignore the sinking feeling brewing her belly at the thought. There was no doubt in her mind, however, that Tasmyn was supernaturally inclined. Though not a witch. “You seem to have a natural talent for chaos, magic or otherwise. It’s quite impressive.” Norma supposed that new furies were made all the time, it was entirely possible this was a new one she didn’t know of. Human was out of the question, she knew that much. It might be safe to test the waters a little further. “It’s a very long story. One that I don’t know all the ins and out of just yet. Maybe I’ll explain it to you sometime later.” Norma could already feel some of her facade slipping just knowing she was talking to someone who was likely not human. Perhaps that was a mistake, considering they were still surrounded. With a sigh, Norma sipped her coffee and decided it needed something extra. She looked over behind the counter and saw those fun pumps of liquid there. She reached over and pumped one right into her drink, despite the barista’s protests. It couldn’t hurt, right? She took a sip and… ‘Ugh, not good. Can you fix this?” she said, handing her drink over to the barista. “Get. Out!” he shouted “Both of you! Out!” Norma looked around for who he could be talking to. Did he mean her? And her new friend? “Well that’s rather rude!” She remarked, snatching her drink back. And the one sitting at the counter.

Tasmyn smiled at the compliment. Or at least she took the comment about chaos as a complement. “Thank you. You’ve got quite the talent for it too.” While she had found a handful of friends in town who were willing to do wild and possibly irresponsible things with her, the fact that this total stranger was so open to it all was refreshing. They didn’t know each other, yet they seemed to understand each other, at least a little bit. “I would very much like to hear that story sometime later.” Was that a way of making future plans? She hoped so, she wanted to be friends with Norma. Tasmyn gaped a little when she saw Norma reach over the counter and put a pump of flavoring into her drink. Sure, nothing they had done in there today had been orthodox coffee shop behavior, but this was ingenious. Create your own flavors. Mix and match. She was about to do the same thing, going for a different flavor though since the one Norma picked didn’t seem to be great. But then the barista spoke. “What? Excuse us. We are customers. The customer is always right. I work at a restaurant, so I know that!” In defiance, she reached over the counter and put a big pump of raspberry flavor into her drink. They were just trying to enjoy their experience. Then the person from before, maybe the manager approached them. “Ladies. I need you both to leave or we will be forced to call the cops.” That struck a bit of worry into Tasmyn’s stomach. The cops? That seemed like an over exaggeration. She turned to her partner in alleged coffee crime, “What should we do?” She asked in a whisper.

“Thank you!” Norma replied instinctively. “I mean, I’m not that chaotic. I’m simply a normal human. Just a human,” she said quickly, trying to cover her slip up, making sure that the last part of her speech was the loudest. Just in case anyone was listening. “I would very much like to tell it to you! Just not here. In the open. I don’t think Megan would full appreciate it.” That said, she was having a grand time with her new friend. Up until a very forceful woman came up to them and asked them to leave. Norma froze a moment before realizing what the consequences of this could really be. Tasmyn whispered to her but here was no question in her mind what she had to do. “The cops? Oh no, I’m a law abiding American citizen! No cops, no thank you! Goodbye!” Norma scooped up as many coffee cups as she could carry from the counter before turning to book it. “Thank you, coffee people! Bye! Nice meeting you Tasmyn! Let’s meet again soon!”

[jowritesthingss]

A (Demi)Boy and His Demon: One

Fandom: Sanders Sides

Pairing(s): LoSleep (Logic | Logan + Sleep | Remy)

Rating: Teen

Content Warning(s): lots of swearing, religion mention, demons mention, drugs mention (just once in passing), one sex joke (a la Remus)

Length: 2,584 words

Brief Summary: Sleep-deprived writer Remy accidentally summons a serious-and-seriously-fed-up demon named Logan. One. In Which Remy Does Something Even Stupider than Summoning a Demon

Fic Masterlist!

*

“Hello,” the person standing in front of Remy said, staring disapprovingly down at him through their glasses.

Remy looked the dude up and down once, twice. (‘Dude’? He wasn’t sure if they were a dude so nah, they’ll stick with ‘person’ moving forward.)

The person standing next to his table was a tall, thin brunette, with no-nonsense rectangular glasses and a no-nonsense expression on their face to match. They were admittedly well-equipped in the looks department—that is to say, they were most definitely hot, Remy’s bi little heart skipped a beat—even if their fashion sense was seemingly nonexistent. They had on a plain black collared shirt, jeans, and what looked like a name tag of sorts—so maybe they were a new barista at the café then? Although Emile hadn’t mentioned any new hires.

“Uh. Can I help you?” Remy asked, arching a perfectly-trimmed eyebrow.

“I believe that I should be the one asking that of you,” the person returned, and...were they glaring at Remy? As much as Remy understood the wrath foodservice workers felt towards particularly Karen-like customers, they really didn’t think the current situation warranted it.

“I’m good right now, actually,” Remy dismissed, hoping the weirdo would get the message, “but thanks for asking. I guess.” They looked back down at their writing again, shuffling the paper with the summoning circle to the side and focusing back in on their laptop.

After a few moments of typing, though, Remy became aware of the shadow that still fell over his keyboard. He glanced up to see the person still staring intently at him—only this time they were closer than ever, standing right at his left shoulder.

“Uh, babe.” Remy wasn’t feeling so nice anymore, and they let the irritation seep into their voice. Remy was on a deadline. Remy had no time for nosy strangers. “Ever heard of personal space?”

“No,” the weirdo responded, and Remy honestly couldn’t tell if they were being serious or sarcastic. It seemed they were being serious, though, when their brow wrinkled in confusion. “You are the one who summoned me, are you not?”

“I...don’t think so?” Remy wracked their brain, trying to recall if there was anything he’d done that might make a barista feel obligated to come check on him. Were they really that much of a pathetic gay? Was it really so obvious that he hadn’t slept in like two days and desperately needed yet another refill of iced coffee? “Yeah, like...I really don’t think I did.”

“And yet you are the one with my summoning circle written down,” the person insisted, gesturing down at the sheet of looseleaf paper, and—wait, what?

“I’m sorry, what?” Remy gaped.

Now that they were closer, Remy could read the name tag on the other person’s—no, the demon’s?—chest, which read “Supreme Lord of Dark Knowledge”, with Logan neatly written in parentheses beneath it.

‘Supreme Lord’ Logan picked up the piece of paper that Remy had aimlessly scribbled a summoning circle upon at random, for use as a reference in designing his own. A few faint droplets of his blood were spattered across it from the papercut. They looked Remy in the eye, and it occurred to Remy that the person’s—Logan’s—eyes were oddly maroon and almost glow-y.

“I am a demon,” Logan said, leaning in to Remy, so close they could practically kiss him, “and you are the one who summoned me. So how may I help you? What is your purpose behind summoning me?”

Remy stared.

Logan returned his gaze, obstinately inching yet closer. Eventually they were getting way too much into Remy’s personal space, rude, so he caved and let Logan win the unspoken battle of wills, yanking their head back almost violently.

Remy started to laugh.

“Oh my god,” they said, gasping for breath. “I haven’t reached the hallucination stage of sleep-deprived caffienation this quickly before.”

“—I. Uh. Pardon?” Perhaps realizing just how uncomfortably close the two were, Logan backed up a respectful distance before looking down at him, confused.

“I’ve gotta say, you’re the most realistic hallucination I’ve had since I tried LSD that one time back in high school.” Remy wiped a tear from the corner of his eye. They looked Logan up and down a bit more appreciatively, now that he knew that they were a product of his own imagination. “Damn, my mind knows how to appeal to my...well, everything. You’re pretty hot.”

“It is hot in hell, yes. So naturally my temperature runs higher.” Every time Remy thought it not possible, Logan became even more perplexed. “Excuse me—if I might request clarification for a moment here. You think that I am not real?”

Logan reached out a hand and closed it securely around Remy’s wrist where it lay on the keyboard of his laptop, his hand steadily pressing the “p” button on the forgotten word document that was chapter seventy. “I can assure you that I very much am not a product of your imagination.”

Remy swore.

“What the fuck,” he said, not caring as his voice gradually grew louder, “what the fuck.” They jerked their arm away from Logan, accidentally knocking over his precious iced coffee, and they swore again as they raced to pick up his laptop and his notes to save them from a watery death.

“Bitch,” Remy hissed at the iced coffee that now steadily inched its way across the table. They then looked up at Logan. “You made me spill my coffee,” he accused. “What the hell, man?”

The supposed demon raised an eyebrow, snapping his fingers, and Remy’s coffee slid back into his cup and righted itself again, good as new, what the fuck. “I do believe that we just established that I am in fact a demon and not a man.”

Shit, shit, yeah, right. “All right, then what are your pronouns?” Remy asked. He wanted to rip them to shreds, yeah, but all the better to not misgender them as he did so.

“Gender does not work for demons as it does for humans,” Logan informed him, “however, in your language, xe/xem/xyr pronouns are particularly...satisfactory...for me.”

“Cool.” Remy nodded. “I’m Remy, they/them and he/him.” He paused. “Okay, like, back to business—what the hell?”

“Yes, that is where I come from.” Logan nodded, and was xe serious or was xe patronizing Remy? They were pretty sure xe was patronizing him.

“Okay.” Remy glared up at xem. “Then like...can you go back already?”

Logan let out a long-suffering sigh, pushing xyr glasses up on the bridge of xyr nose. “Tell me what deal you would like to make, and then yes, I will gladly depart from this ridiculous world.”

“I’ll remind you that you’re the one who appeared in this ‘ridiculous world’ out of literal fucking nowhere,” Remy snarked, half under their breath.

“And I shall remind you that you are the one who summoned me,” Logan snapped. Xe scrutinized Remy carefully. “Although I must say, I was not expecting the likes of you to be intelligent enough to summon me at all, much less as unintentionally as it appears to have been.”

“Hey! Watch what you’re sayin—nope, never mind that.” Remy exhaled loudly, exasperated. “Just tell me how to get rid of you already.”

“Very well.” Logan pushed xyr glasses up on the bridge of xyr nose. “It is quite simple, really. In order to break our connection, all you must do is destroy the summoning circle that initially began the connection. In order to do that you must—”

“Oh, really?” Remy relaxed, shoulders lowering slightly. Nice and easy. That was good. “That’s easy.” He grabbed the paper in both hands and started to tear.

“Wait, no! No, not like that, you are going to—” Logan leapt on top of Remy, knocking them and their chair to the ground.

But it was too late. Remy had already ripped the paper—and, consequently, the summoning circle—in half.

A snapping, burning feeling coursed through Remy’s body as he crashed to the ground, hard.

The torn halves of the paper fluttered to the ground around Remy and Logan as they lay on the floor, disoriented, Logan on top of Remy, Logan’s face in Remy’s neck and Remy with their vision impaired by Logan’s hair.

Remy spat out a mouthful of Logan’s hair, shoving xem off of him. “What the fuck?” he exclaimed once more, not unlike a broken record.

“I should be asking the same of you,” Logan spat, straightening xemself up and adjusting xyr glasses, and holy hell, if Remy had thought xe was glaring before, it was about fifty times worse now. “You are supposed to burn the circle and destroy it, you half-wit. By merely breaking the circle as you did you didn’t release me, you bound me to you for life.”

“Well, like, how was I supposed to know that?” Remy shot back through clenched teeth, trying to stave back the anger and panic churning in the pit of his stomach.

“I was just about to tell you that,” Logan seethed, and shitshitshit, abort mission, maybe Remy should back off, maybe angering the supposed demon wasn’t a good idea, xyr eyes were literally shining with literal fire and xyr hair was starting to float up and that couldn’t be good—

“Hey now! What’s going on here?”

Remy and Logan looked up to see Emile standing in front of them, short and chubby and blond and arms crossed and wearing his bright purple apron and scary-calm, which was somehow even more terrifying than the literal demon, even as he was practically an angel (not literally—or at least, Remy didn’t think it was literal—god, please tell them it wasn’t literal).

“Why don’t we take whatever this is to the back?” Emile asked the two of them, only it really wasn’t a question.

Oh, yeah. They were in the middle of a busy coffee shop full of witnesses, weren’t they.

Remy shoved themself to their feet and hastily grabbed his things, while Logan righted the chair xe had knocked over when xe took Remy down. Then, meekly and not unlike scolded children, Remy and Logan followed Emile to the employee break room. And boy, Remy was not looking forward to the conversation that no doubt would ensue.

-

“...So you’re saying you’re a demon,” Emile said slowly, eyes wide as he stared at Logan.

“Indeed.” Logan waved xyr hand and extinguished the indigo flames that had previously been dancing across xyr palm.

“Ooh ooh ooh! Like Bill Cipher?” Emile asked excitedly.

Remy lowered their face into their hands.

“Like—ah, yes, of course,” responded Logan the actual literal fucking demon, “although I personally prefer to take a more humanesque appearance on the rare occasions that I am summoned. I find it is more calming for the humans that summon me.” Xe tilted xyr head, looking curiously at Emile. “You’ve met Cipher?”

“I—” Emile gasped, eyes practically starry, and hell, could this get any worse for Remy. “He’s real? I knew it!”

The bell jingled back out in the shop, then not two seconds later the employee door swung open, and hell, this could get worse for Remy.

Remus stepped through the door, eyes bright with mischievous delight and clad in a hideous combination of jeans, some obscure band tee, and an honest-to-god camouflage-patterned tutu. “I heard through the grapevine that some major shit is going down.”

Remy glared half-heartedly at Emile. “You did not text him.”

Emile laughed awkwardly, scratching at the back of his neck.

“Babe,” Remy groaned. “You didn’t.”

“He did!” Remus garbled out, grinning wider than the Joker. “So our dear little Remsykins has a boyfriend now?”

“Not a boy,” Logan said, while at the same time, Remy groaned, “Not my boyfriend.”

“Details.” Remus waved Remy off, although he at least had the decency to ask Logan xyr pronouns before opening his mouth to continue harassing the two of them with questions.

Remy held up a hand. “Uh, nope. I’m dealing with enough bullshit right now, babe, and I’m still mad at you for falling so far behind on art. None of your weird questions about, like, fucking demons or eternal torture or whatever, please.”

Remus’ mouth clacked shut loudly, and he looked rather put-off. Then what Remy had said fully sank in. “Wait, demons? As in, demons existing? For reals?”

Remy turned to Logan, despairing, and thankfully xe seemed to get the message, stepping in.

“Indeed they are, as you put it, ‘for reals’,” Logan affirmed. “I’ll give you...ah, I believe humans still say the ‘Spark Notes’ version of our present circumstance. In researching for their comic, Remy inadvertently copied down my summoning circle. When he got a paper-cut, blood got onto the circle, and he spoke the incantation—” Logan turned to look at Remy, “—which, by the way how on earth did you manage to accidentally say the summoning incantation?”

“I didn’t,” Remy said, furrowing his eyebrows.

“Did you say anything at all?” Logan asked.

Remy thought back. “Uh, I think I said...‘goddammit’?”

“Ah.” Logan blinked. “Yes, well, that isn’t the traditional incantation, but...it suffices.”

Remy threw up their hands, walking away from Logan, Remus, and Emile and glaring mightily at the overly cheery coffee-themed wallpaper. “What the fuck,” he said to no one in particular for the umpteenth time. It was rapidly becoming his favorite phrase.

“Incantations aside, I was summoned,” Logan continued, as if xe had never been interrupted in the first place, “whereupon your friend panicked and accidentally bound me to them for the rest of their life.”

Remus cackled, delighted. “Damn, Remsykinsies, haven’t you gotten yourself into a mess!”

“I don’t. Want. To think about it,” Remy seethed, turning back around to face him and the others again. “I’d much rather we focus on how you should really be leaving to go finish up chapter sixty-five already, thank you very much.”

“Like I’d miss out on watching you humiliate yourself?” Remus was getting the last of the giggles out of his system. “Fat chance.” He swiped a tear of mirth out of the corner of his eye before he continued to speak. “Anyhow, so you’re telling me that demons actually exist in this world, and I’m not one of them?” he asked, his tone mildly indignant. “Rude.”

“And thank god for that,” Remy muttered under their breath, collapsing onto the overstuffed pink couch in the break room. Even if Logan didn’t kill them and steal their soul or some shit, Remus simply being Remus was about to do him in. “The moment you become a demon is the moment the world burns.”

“Exactly!” Remus grinned at him, and how did his teeth look sharper than that of the actual demon in the room? Maybe Remus really wasn’t human after all.

“Eh, whatever! Moving on!” Remus rounded on Logan, expression alight with all the fires of hell, and Remy was really having a difficult time remembering who, exactly, the demon was in this scenario. “I just want to know—are you a demon in the sheets?”

Remy lowered his head into his arms and screamed.

(That night, as Remy and Logan awkwardly lay on opposing sides of Remy’s bed, resolutely refusing to face each other, Logan would ask how on earth could it be possible for xem to not be a demon in the sheets, as xe is a demon everywhere xe goes, and Remy would fall off the bed.)

.

.

.

Prologue || One || Two || Three || Four || Five || Six

*

Chapter two should be up either Friday or Saturday, and if not then def by next Wednesday. Also btw if you haven’t figured it out by now, Remy’s a demiboy who uses he/they pronouns in this, and Logan uses xe/xem/xyr, although as a demon human concepts of gender don’t really apply. ^^

Want to be added onto any of my taglists? Shoot me an ask or a message here or via my other social media!

[disabled-queen-hc-blog]

Autistic John who isn't very verbal? He speaks with very few words. People think he is speaking like a baby but it's just how he talks. He can communicate ideas perfectly but people make fun of him still ...

Freddie sighed, finger running over the stanza he was struggling with. “This won’t do. It’ll be too cluttered, don’t you think? But I like this bass line,” he said with a frown, scanning the sheet music for an idea of how to fix the song that was becoming more messier and headache inducing by the minute. 

John stooped behind Freddie to take a look at what he was struggling with. The answer seemed to come easy to him since he smiled, pointing as he talked. “Is okay, Freddie. Guitar and bass too much here. Move bass line here,” he pointed further down the sheet, “And it maybe sound better.” he finished with a firm nod. 

Freddie’s eyebrows furrowed trying to imagine in his head what it’d sound like. He tapped his chin, mumbling, “That could work...”

Roger, who sat opposite to Freddie shook his head. “Wait, if your bass line gets simpler there, I’ll have to change my drumline too or I’ll sound insane,” he said, pointing vaguely to the area in question. 

“Roger change his eighths to fourths and he not sound crazy then,” John said, once again all too easily. 

The three of them stared at the papers, constructing the sounds in their heads before they all gave the affirmative. It’d work. They could tweak it in the recording booth if needed. 

“Sounds alright to me! Now where’s Brian? He needs to look this over,” Roger said, spinning in his chair to find the guitarist. 

Brian was by the door, putting on his coat and scarf. “I’m going out to get some coffee that doesn’t taste like shit. You all want anything?” he asked, glancing at that infernal coffee maker. If they wanted to bang this song out at once, they’d need some proper caffienation that didn’t taste like liquid tar. 

“Oh, yes. Get me a dark roast, please!” Roger called out.

“I’m good, love,” Freddie said, distracted with rewrites.

“John can have espresso instead?” John asked, his eye bags a testament to how much caffeine he needed to get through this session.

Brian shot them all finger guns before escaping outside into the bitter cold. John plopped himself down next to Freddie, yawning loudly. 

As Freddie scribbled, he mumbled, “This is actually quite brilliant, Deacy.”

John gave him a sleepy smile, mumbling back, “I am smart.”

♚

“Looks like someone had a fun time at the discotheque last night,” Roger said in a sing song voice poking the exhausted bassist’s side. John squeaked but continued to fiddle with his bass on the floor.

“I did. Dance til ‘4,” John said, his lips forming a small smile. He liked to dance, what could he say? Maybe he wasn’t the best around, but it was fun and no one bothered him. Very few things could beat that.

Roger smirked as he tightened some screws on his drum kit. “Mhm. Danced. Alright. I know you were chatting up some birds. Getting a little too knackered, huh? I know you, Deacy. Not so innocent!” Roger said, pointing a playful finger at him.

John blushed, nearly popping on of his strings, having forgot he was even tuning it. “Did not! Not go to disco to talk. Go for dance only.” he said, his face serious. It softened, going coy when he added, “Go for drink too...”

Not last night though. He had to choose between being tired or tired and hungover. He had one beer before cutting himself off. With how Roger was tuning his drums, he thanked god he did. 

Roger winked and snorted, saying in a clearly sarcastic voice, “Sure thing, John.”

John threw his pick square into Roger’s forehead, earning himself a feigned look of shock from the blond. “John not go to disco to flirt!” he yelled, knowing Roger was kidding but refusing to miss an opportunity to pelt him with things.

Roger hid behind his bass drum, peeking his head out to say, “Sure,” before hiding behind it again. John threw his string pack at him, missing.

“Am not cheeky like Roger!”

“Mhm...”

“Am not!”

“Uh-huh.”

John was about to take off his shoe when Freddie caught the both of them not warming up. 

♚

John clung to Freddie’s side, looking down at his lap. 

If I don’t look at them, they won’t ask me any questions. If I don’t look, they’ll leave me alone.

“So what are the plans for this upcoming album?” the interviewer asked, leaning the microphone towards Freddie.

Freddie shook some hair out of his face, smiling as he spoke, “Well, we don’t want to spoil anything but we are going big. It’ll be like nothing we’ve done before and certainly nothing you’ve ever heard,”

The man nodded, shooting out another question. “And the creative process? How’s it been like?”

John’s stomach dropped when the mic landed right in front of his mouth. His eyes went wide, immediately looking to the older besides him in a panic.

Brian laughed, trying to diffuse the awkwardness that was rising and tried to answer the question in place of John. The interviewer interrupted him though, saying, “Why don’t we let John speak. He hasn’t said a peep!”

John’s brain went blank, his heart thundering in his chest.

This was always the worst part.

John had no issues speaking around the boys. They understood. They never made fun of him. 

The rest of the world never gave him that dignity. 

People said he was talking like a baby on purpose. That he knew better.

And to be fair, he did know better. John could form sentences that many would deem “normal” enough but it hurt. It was mentally and physically taxing having to formulate the right syntax and words. Even then, he wasn’t very good at it. He never was.

Which is why he chose to stay quiet during interviews. He didn’t want to embarrass himself and more importantly, the band. Up until, perhaps, just now, he was seen as just the quiet and shy one. Not the stupid one. 

When he opened his mouth though, he wasn’t sure if he’d stay the cute quiet one for much longer.

“C- Uh, T-The process..have..been..has been um..very-” John went ghostly pale as he stammered, his color only coming back when Roger let out a gigantic guffaw.

“John, how hung over are you?” he asked, his teeth showing in a big grin. While his lips said teasing, his eyes said something different. Something along the lines of, “I’ve got you.”

John let out a sigh of relief, murmuring back to Roger, “Very.”

The interviewer chuckled, patting John’s shoulder. “To be young again!” he said, swiftly moving on to another question and another member. 

Once it wrapped up, John nearly flopped onto the floor. He never wanted that to happen again. He knew it would though. Interviewers wanted to be polite and include him. It was understandable but terrifying. But at least he survived this round relatively unscathed. That was all he could ask for.

As everyone dispersed, decompressing from all that talking, John walked up to Brian, who was guzzling down water because he was actually hungover and said, “Thank you Bri for try and help.” Brian gave him a side hug and a wave off. It’s no big deal, he mouthed as he rubbed his temple.

John went up to Roger next, giving him a bear hug, something a little out of character for him. “Thank you Roger for help me. I maybe pass out if you don’t,” he said, a shake in his voice as he remembered the gripping fear he felt some minutes ago. 

Roger hugged back gently at first, perhaps shaken up himself by the situation but he quickly returned to his usual self, giving John a squeeze and pulling away. “The nerve of that guy, huh? A man can’t have the wine flu in peace these days?” Roger laughed as he spoke. It got a giggle out of John, saying, “John guess not,”

The two snickered amongst themselves until Freddie rounded them up to get back in the van.

“I say this is grounds for some pizza, darlings!” Freddie said with a flamboyant clap, turning around to march out the door of the building.

“Pizza not in budget,” John said meekly.

Freddie turned back to face them, winking. “It’s on me,” he said as he held up a wallet.

Roger squinted before screaming, “That’s my wallet, you bugger!”

“John wants the works pizza then.”

“Absolutely not!”

“Vegetarian pizza sounds nice right about now.”

“I buy Bri veggie pizza.”

“Not with my money, you gits!”

“Two veggie pizza.”

“Aw, that’s so considerate of you, Deacy.”

“Is no one listening to me?”

“John is not.”

[love-elizabeth-the-3rd-blog]

How would the rfa members react to being handcuffed to MC

Jumin:

Well, this was odd

Of course, he liked it actually, he got to keep MC close to him and he’d always be able to look after her being by her side and all, yes

But he had to go into work, he had a few meetings and it seemed like it just wouldn’t unlock

He called someone in to try and get the handcuffs off, but unfortunately or fortunately it did not seem to work out

Seems MC is coming with him to work today

So he and MC went to the C&R building

Jumin acted like everything was normal, keeping his composure, but MC was flustered

the employees gave confused looks when they eventually noticed the cuffs

Jumin walked into the meeting, “Hello everyone, this is my wife, she will be joining us today due to circumstances.” Oh god Jumin

They weren’t discussing confidential matters but since it was his wife it probably was okay

Jaehae was first pleasantly surprised to see MC at the office since it was quite unexpected, when she was about to ask why- she noticed the handcuffs, Jumin was in a hurry though, so MC didn’t have much of a chance to explain.

Just que them walking past a very confused Jaehae

Yoosung

Oh god

oh god oh god

his face went red when he realized he couldnt get the thing off

flustered as heck as he nervously laughs to Mc

He has to go to school!

tries fruitlessly to get the thing off before weeping

what is he going to do??

He calls Seven for help who then proceeds to tease him about it

You what? Hahaha! Seven laughed over the phone

I had no idea you were into that!

Shut up it’s not like that! Yoosung shouted, flustered as hell

Mc giggled

Oooh hi Mc! Seems you two lovers are in a tight spot hey?

Obviously none of his advice was helpful

So in the end, they went to yoosung’s school together

Yeah no he’s never going to live this one down

Zen:

Oh boy

This man

I mean he kind of likes it actually, quite kinky

No focus Zen, no time for thoughts like that

feels himself getting hot anyway

he kind of lifts his hand and looks at it curiously

Why wasn’t it unlocking???

He had rehearsals today, so this was not good, no matter how much he liked it

he frantically tried all sorts of comical ways to try and get it off

But also made sure Mc’s wrist didn’t hurt from it

Winded up bring Mc with him to rehearsals as the rest of the cast tried to help him with this situation

Had his head in his hand, face red out of embarressment

Very happy this gave him the excuse to bring Mc with though

Jaehae:

Um...

Where did these cuffs even come from?

How did this happen?

Apologizes to Mc and tries to figure out how to get them off

Inspects it at it seems to be jammed so it wont unlock

Sighs and panics since she has to go to work

also brisk walks around the apartment trying to unlock the cuffs with all sorts of things, comically dragging an amused Mc around as she did so

Let me tell you being dragged a caffienated Jaehae was quite an experience

she winded up having to race to work anyway since nothing was working and she had to be there in time

Apologizes to Mc and begs her to bare with her

Jumin arrives and greets Jaehae like he usually does, by about to give her work right off the bat, “Assitant Kang-” he’s surprised to see MC though and his eyes widen a little with curiousity

“Oh, MC, I wasn’t expecting you to be here. How are yo-” he then noticed the cuffs and bound Mc and jaehae together

He looked back up at them as Mc smiled adorably and Jaehae trying to hide her embarrassment, her eyes closed and her brows knitted “I apologize Mr Han, we seem to be in a bit of a... situation.”

“I see. Well please have these documents done, and make sure MC is comfortable during her visit.” He then walks off as if this was a normal thing

though honestly he was silently laughing to himself

Seven:

Of course this would happen

It’s all fun and games and now look where it’s gotten you too

He’s actually genuinely worried now, this thing seems to be jammed

Don’t worry! I Seven Zero Seven, shall use my genuis skills to get out of this mess!

Kind of doesn’t want to, this is hilarious

Fidgets around as you’re kind of yanked with his movements when he tries to find something to get you two free

it doesnt work but he gets a new idea

Oops~ he yanks you to him so you fall into his arms

“Sorry Mc, I need this hand to work.” he smirks as you just lay on his lap as he taps on the computer

loves playfully dragging you around

[ayyoitsalex]

Chapter 9 - Yes Chef!

Ooh! It's finally my turn to talk! We've never formally met, you've only read about me. Well anyway, my names Elizabeth Brooke Ryan. I go by a few names that my friends and family have come up with, so just pick one of those. Those names are; Elizabeth, Liz, Lizzy, Beth, Eliza, E.B., E.R, E., E. Ry, Ryan, and I think that's it. As you already know I'm youngest of my Ryan family siblings, I'm five foot five, blonde hair, green eyes, and I wear glasses. I didn't do sports like my siblings when I was in high school, I found a different kind of skill that I was good at. Instead I would learn cooking and baking at different rec centers and take classes wherever I could. I just found the whole thing so interesting, and it just came so natural. Despite my reputation as a picky eater. Hey I'm working on it! At this point I'd like to consider myself the best cook in my family. My siblings love being my taste testers and always have been ever since I made my first batch of cookies with mom when I was like..eight. Even though theres a pretty significant age gap between us, we're all close. I'm not any closer to one sibling more than another, I love them all equally. They all took time to take care of me growing up and in different ways. I study at a culinary school in San Diego, and my parents were gracious enough to pay for my entire tuition, but I do work at a restaurant for experience and y'know ya girl needs some spending money. I work at kind of a fancy-ish french restaurant, but I only do prep work. So I'm cutting lots of onions, carrots, potatoes, and crushing a whole mess of garlic. My dream is really to be a chef at a restaurant I love. Simple I know, but I'm a simple person. A lot of people think cooking is a chore or a hassle, but it's something I do that makes me happy and makes me feel creative and special. I live in a small-ish apartment near the school so on occasion I'll walk to school and work, but sometimes I'll feel weird walking around toting around a briefcase looking bag of knives. When I made the decision to go to culinary school it wasn't until I'd already done a year at a traditional college. I wasn't passionate about anything I was taking, and nothing seemed to make me want to dedicate my life to it. It was a real internal struggle since I didn't wanna feel like I was disappointing my parents in going an unconventional route. Though when I did finally tell them they were supportive. I don't know why I expected anything else from them, they're the best! Word got to my siblings on my decision and they all chipped in together to buy me my knives to show their support as well. They were Henckel knives that I'd walk by in Sur la Table all the time and just pine for. Can you say #Blessed ? -ALARM- I struggled underneath the covers trying to find my way out. When I finally emerged I turned the blaring alarm off, and made my way to the bathroom. I did my business and splashed some cold water on my face to wake me up a little bit more. "Alexa, play THE LIST!" I smiled turning to my reflection in the mirror. C'est La Vie began playing and I danced around my apartment probably looking like an idiot. Though what did I care I lived alone. "Say you will say you won't, say you'll do what I don't!" I continued singing probably off-key, dancing my way into the kitchen to make breakfast. Opening the fridge I examined the miriad of leftovers populating the shelves. First things first, i popped open a monster energy. I shook the caffiene through as I took the first sip. "C'est la vie!" I smiled hitting it right on time. -Knock knock- I skipped over to the door and looked through the peep hole. I unlocked the door welcoming inside my two best friends James and Rebecca. James walked in also holding the hand of his son. We usually walk to school together, but today they were early. "Healthy breakfast you got there." James laughed pointing to my energy drink. "It's just a warm up. I was going to have a real breakfast." "That and maybe put on some pants there." Rebecca said. "I'm wearing shorts! I wouldn't have answered the door pants-less I'm not a heathen Rebecca." Though I could see how I did look pantless with my big t-shirt covering my shorts. "Anyway, what're you guys doin here so early. We don't leave for another like..half hour." "I was actually going to ask if I could use your shower cause they were doin some stuff over at my building and the waters out.." Rebecca said pushing her index fingers together. "Well let me go first. And since I'm doing you this favor you make us breakfast then!" "Okay deal. See James look at how nice our friend Elizabeth is. That's why she's my best friend not you" "I can't help that my roommates had the bathrooms occupied when you came over. Get cookin there." I heard Rebecca rummaging through my cabinets for pans while I walked over to the bathroom to take a shower. The good thing about having friends in culinary school is that you can always rely on someone to cook. When I came out the cloud of steam flowed into the apartment. "Jeez you must take some hot showers." Rebecca said plating an omlette. I shrugged my shoulders, still drying my hair. "Okay I did my part. SHOWER!" She picked up her bag and practically ran to the shower. I sat down with James and his son, eating the omlette with what looked to be cut up portions of leftovers. I washed up the dishes and made final checks before we all made our way out of my place. I slinged my bag over my shoulder and picked up my knife kit on our way out the door. We talked about random things on our way to school, but not before making a quick stop for James. He dropped his son off at day-care which also was conveniently close to the school. "I really don't know how you do the whole single dad thing." Rebecca said. "What do you mean?" He said while replying to texts. "I mean I can barely take care of myself let alone another person, and ALONE." "Well he's not alone Becks. He's got us." I smiled. "Aha thanks Liz. But yeah I've got help but I just wanna do as much on my own as I can without burdening anyone else." "You're one of the strongest people I know James." Rebecca said before taking the last sip of her coffee. We made our way onto campus before parting ways to head to our classes. "Meet for lunch!" Rebecca shouted. Both James and I gave her the thumbs up. i walked into my first class of the day which was baking. I learned a lot of my baking knowledge from not only my mom but also my aunt Camryn. Along with her wedding planning business she has her own baking business on the side. She wasn't always my nicest teacher to me, but I did learn a lot. I buttoned up my chef's jacket and sat down in the lecture hall to watch a demonstration. I paid attention as best I could taking whatever notes I felt would help me the most later. This isn't like a typical lecture with slides,  it's literally a projection of someone making a dish. When it was finished the class went into the test kitchen to see if we could recreate it. I did fairly well on my recreation but just a few plating issues kept me from a perfect score. Still an A none the less with room for improvement. I checked the clock. I walked over to the cafeteria where Rebecca was already there waiting with her second coffee of the day. Though what can I expect from someone that considers themself a sommelier of coffee. "How was baking class?" Rebecca asked a little shakily. I'm assuming it's from all the caffiene she's had in such a short amount of time. "I made the pastry fine, but I just had plating issues. My coulis wasn't as thick as I wanted and it started streaking on the plate. So I got docked points, but still an A." I shrugged trying not to think about it too much. "Well that's good." "What's good?" James asked walking over to us carrying a tray. "Liz got an A in baking today, but she's mad about her coulis." "Oh bummer. Cookie?" He offered. I smirked taking it. "Ha nothing a cookie couldn't solve." "Okay rude you didn't offer me one." "Excuse me where are my manners, Rebecca would you also like a cookie?" "Hold the sarcasm with that one." Rebecca said reaching over. "But yes I would." I took a bite laughing at their exchange. "*SPITS JAMES!" I rubbed a napkin on my tongue. Both of them looking at me crazy. "THESE ARE RAISIN!" "...and?" James said slowly taking a bite for himself. "WHO LIKES OATMEAL RAISIN COOKIES!?" I fumed passing it back to him. Rebecca's eyes grew wide. "You would like raisins!" Rebecca huffed. "C'mon Elizabeth, let's get real food." We stuck our tongues out while James laughed to himself. Moving through the lunch line, Rebecca and I grabbed food onto our trays to forget the trauma of the raisin trying to be a chocolate chip. What sick bastard decided cookies needed raisins?! I settled on a chicken sandwich with polenta fries, while Rebecca got a skirt steak salad with chipotle dressing. Perks of going to a culinary school is you get food normally not thought of in regular college. "I can't believe you did that to me. I THOUGHT WE WERE FRIENDS!" I took a hard bite into my sandwich. He just shrugged his shoulders before taking another bite of that monstrosity of a dessert. When we finished lunch it was time for me to head to my cooking basics class. The class I'm probably best at. Like my baking class we start off watching a demo of a dish being made and then are asked to recreate. I like this one in particular cause we get to eat whatever we make. I'm not so much a sweet tooth person so that's why this one takes rank over desserts. Also this way I usually don't have to make dinner. We were making pan roasted chicken, braised swiss chard, roasted parsnips, and carmelized cipollini onions. It's a dish I could make in my sleep. When I got into the kitchen it was time for business. I didn't hear anyone, I wasn't talking, the only thing I was doing was cooking. I finished somewhere in the middle of the class, and brought my dish up to be judged. My professor cut into my chicken and I hoped to fuck it wasn't raw. He picked the piece up on the fork and I saw BOOM right on the money. He took bits from around the plate onto a single bite. "Very good Elizabeth. Another good days work. You can enjoy your dish if you want or leave it to another student." FUCK THAT. I brought my plate back to my station and started eating. I did the dishes at my station when I got done, and packed up my knives. James and Rebecca were waiting outside my class as we were all going to work right afterwards. James is a waiter at the restaurant, and Rebecca works the bar. They're both a little older than I am, and I'm only twenty. I met them both pretty randomly when sitting alone in the cafeteria. Rebecca sat down at my table and just introduced herself to me. Complete opposite of my own personality, and then right after James did the same. I guess they could tell I was new or something and needed friends. Since then we've all just hung out, and they even helped me get the job at the restaurant. "Looked good whatever you were eating." Rebecca said. "Oh so good. I love having a class where you eat what you make." "Aha I remember those classes. Enjoy them now." James warned. "Aw James don't scare her!" Rebecca laughed. "I'm just sayin! I can't eat my accounting homework." Way to bring down my mood James. "Well whatever, let's get to work." We walked off campus and rode the bus. I made it to my station of unchopped vegetables and got right into it. "Hey Elizabeth." Our head chef greeted me. "Hi!" I smiled looking up from my pile of carrots. "I'm also gonna need you to break down those romaine hearts. We got tableside Caesars going tonight." "Ooh fun. Are you guys making the dressing from scratch?" "Yeah actually, you ever done it?" He asked inspecting the various stations. "Just at home, it was okay." "Aha hard to believe this is your first year at culinary." What can I say? Humble brag. "Well I'll leave you to get back to work." "Alright, bye chef!" I don't even think I know our head chef's real name. I just call him chef. I set my knife down for a minute to shake the feeling back into my hands. The pile of carrots slowly began to dwindle down, so I shifted my focus to the romaine hearts. After washing and spinning them I broke them down for salad. I brought the bowls to the trolleys for the table side service. I stood at the front of the kitchen just imagining what it'd be like. "Alright on order! Four covers!" I said pretending to read a ticket. I heard laughs behind me and immediately I turned around shook. A few of the line cooks had seen me. "Aw..she's playing pretend." One of them said walking past me. "How cute..thinks she's an actual chef." Another chef smirked attempting to pinch my cheek. I pulled my face away, trying to be as stone face as possible as they walked by. Inside I was dying. I was so embarrassed. I ran back into the walk-in fridge to cool off. I took a few deep breaths to collect myself. The head chef walked in, and jumped back surprised to see me in there. "Whoa! I didn't expect to see anyone in here." "Oh..um I was just..never mind I don't know what I was doing." "You okay?" He asked looking me in the eyes. "Yeah yeah just..nothing." I tried to walk past him back into the kitchen. He held his arm out blocking my way. "Hey tell me what's wrong." He leaned up against the door. "No one can hear what we're talking about it's okay. What you say will be between us, and I can tell you're a little rattled about something." "*sigh well..alright. I was at the front of the pass with no one in the kitchen and I kinda like pretended I was calling out orders..y'know like a real head chef. Then I guess some of the line cooks saw me and kinda..made fun of me for pretending." "Mm I see. So lemme ask you something. What's your goal from all this?" "What? To be a head chef." "So what if you imagine yourself in that role and some people see? You can see yourself doing that, and that's what matters. Those chefs are probably just content working the line and never getting better. They probably stopped learning a long time ago. You're dreaming bigger. You've got something Elizabeth and I'm not just saying that." I nodded my head. "Now walk back in there like you belong in there." He pointed me back into the kitchen. I pulled my shoulders back and walked confidently back in. I found the chefs that passed by me. They smirked at me again, mocking the motions I was doing earlier. "I will be a head chef one day, and a damn good one. So FUCK YOU!" The head chef covered his mouth laughing as I returned to my station. I must've said it pretty loud since I could hear both James and Rebecca laughing their ass off. Good thing we hadn't opened for dinner yet!

[dine-on-nervine]

1. Would you have sex with the last person you text messaged? I have had sex with the last person I messaged.

2. You talked to an ex today, correct? Nope.

3. Have you taken someones virginity? This has happened twice.

4. Is trust a big issue for you? Without it, what do you have?

5. Did you hang out with the person you like recently? It’s bveen a week as of yesterday since I’ve seen her.

6. What are you excited for? Seeing her and my folks (together!) in two weeks.

7. What happened tonight? Tonight is still several hours away so I don’t have an answer.

8. Do you think it’s disgusting when girls get really wasted? I think it’s disgusting when anyone gets really wasted.

9. Is confidence cute? Hella.

10. What is the last beverage you had? Icewater.

11. How many people of the opposite sex do you fully trust? One for sure, several gets a “mostly”.

12. Do you own a pair of skinny jeans? Nooo, straight male here.

13. What are you gonna do Saturday night? Yesterday was Saturday and I did nothing at all.

14. What are you going to spend money on next? Gas up the car for the week.

15. Are you going out with the last person you kissed? Yes, yes I am, thank you for asking, I most certainly am.

16. Do you think you’ll change in the next 3 months? What defects or deficiencies do you see you want me to address?

17. Who do you feel most comfortable talking to about anything? Wayne.

18. The last time you felt broken? Hmm, it’s been awhile, so let’s say last year.

19. Have you had sex today? Only with myself.

20. Are you starting to realize anything? This survey was a straight list of 92 questions, and I have had to highlight, bold, and enter on everything. That takes a lot of work.

21. Are you in a good mood? I am. I haven’t had to face customers yet.

22. Would you ever want to swim with sharks? As a resident of the top of the food chain, I don’t see why I’d want to.

23. Are your eyes the same color as your dad’s? Nope, he’s got blue eyes. Also, adopted.

24. What do you want right this second? Not sure I want anything at this moment but more time.

25. What would you say if the person you love/like kissed another girl/boy? Honestly depends upon who it is. Context matters.

26. Is your current hair color your natural hair color? Yes.

27. Would you be able to date someone who doesn’t make you laugh? It’d never get that far.

28. What was the last thing that made you laugh? http://www.blacktwittercomedy.com/post/175671888939

29. Do you really, truly miss someone right now? Really and for true.

30. Does everyone deserve a second chance? Some things are too egregious.

31. Honestly, do you hate the last boy you were talking to? I think I said hello to the guy in the next room, so ... not hate but really have no liking for. I was awaken this morning by several minutes of retching in the bathroom by his sorry ass. The fuck did he eat, Friday’s pizza which is still on top of the stove on Sunday?

32. Does the person you have feelings for right now, know you do? She’s been apprised of the situation and reacts accordingly.

33. Are you one of those people who never drinks soda? I wish I were. But I’m one of those people who loves sugar and caffiene.

34. Listening to? No music right now, just the usual chip fans (not really hearing the tinnitus right now) and the bike bell when I get a new text.

35. Do you ever write in pencil anymore? Whenever the thing I want to write may require correction.

36. Do you know where the last person you kissed is? She’s texted a minute ago so it appears to be at home (or for a couple more hours) doing some reading/research/Tumblring.

37. Do you believe in love at first sight? This happens.

38. Who did you last call? Days ago called Cara to leave a message with some information.

39. Who was the last person you danced with? Geez, that was a couple years ago... AnnaMae at a casino.

40. Why did you kiss the last person you kissed? Because she’s magically delicious and I had to leave her shack.

41. When was the last time you ate a cupcake? Some time in the last week someone brought a tray.

42. Did you hug/kiss one of your parents today? They live 4.5 hours away so no. Gimme a crack at it on the 19th.

43. Ever embarrass yourself in front of a crush? This is more the rule than the exception.

44. Do you tan in the nude? I do though I haven’t purposely tanned in years.

45. If you could, would you take back your last kiss? No, I’d multiply it.

46. Did you talk to someone until you fell asleep last night? Other than myself, no. I did send a lengthy text (basically a book review) right before I went to sleep so that might in a way qualify.

47. Who was the last person to call you? Cara. Was hoping it’d be work to ask me in this morning but...

48. Do you sing in the shower? I really try not to.

49. Do you dance in the car? When the groove hits me. But I mostly play classical in the car, so I might be playing air-piano/harpsichord or air-violin.

50. Ever used a bow and arrow? Yes, archery is cool. My aim isn’t too bad.

51. Last time you got a portrait taken by a photographer? Gee wow, the 1990s.

52. Do you think musicals are cheesy? By and large.

53. Is Christmas stressful? By and large.

54. Ever eat a pierogi? Yes, I am sure I have. And peroshkis too.

55. Favorite type of fruit pie? Cherry.

56. Occupations you wanted to be when you were a kid? Bra fitter for a midrange department store.

57. Do you believe in ghosts? Spirits exist but they do not wear sheets.

58. Ever have a Deja-vu feeling? Frequently.

59. Take a vitamin daily? Nope.

60. Wear slippers? Nope.

61. Wear a bath robe? Nope. I own one but haven’t put it on in years.

62. What do you wear to bed? Not a stitch.

63. First concert? Freedom Jam

64. Wal-Mart, Target or Kmart? Target. Fewer freaks in front of and behind the register.

65. Nike or Adidas? They’re shoes.

66. Cheetos Or Fritos? Fritos since I don’t eat Cheetos.

67. Peanuts or Sunflower seeds? Peanuts. Sunflower seeds give me flashbacks from summer camp.

68. Favorite Taylor Swift song? There’s more than one, when it comes right down to it?

69. Ever take dance lessons? Nope.

70. Is there a profession you picture your future spouse doing? Pharmacy tech. Pill pusher.

71. Can you curl your tongue? Yes, I can.

72. Ever won a spelling bee? Yes, I have.

73. Have you ever cried because you were so happy? Once. Because I was getting out of a situation that made me suicidal.

74. What is your favorite book? I don’t have one.

75. Do you study better with or without music? With, and it has to be something that can fade to the background like classical or Muzak.

76. Regularly burn incense? Yeah.

77. Ever been in love? Boy howdy, have I!

78. Who would you like to see in concert? Depeche Mode for my 5th time. Just not playing ‘Spirit’.

79. What was the last concert you saw? Not sure if it was Depeche Mode or Blue Man Group.

80. Hot tea or cold tea? Good either way. Need some hot Scottish breakfast right now.

81. Tea or coffee? Tea.

82. Favorite type of cookie? Chocolate chip, peanut butter, toffee, but I will eat pretty much anything.

83. Can you swim well? I swim pretty okay, just out of practice.

84. Can you hold your breath without holding your nose? Yes.

85. Are you patient? I try to be.

86. DJ or band, at a wedding? DJ so the music will be worthwhile.

87. Ever won a contest? Just did that the other day.

88. Ever have plastic surgery? Nah, I’m staying my natural imperfect self.

89. Which are better black or green olives? Depends upon what you’re doing with them. I prefer green olives.

90. Opinions on sex before marriage? Right before the ceremony could be fun. Oh wait. Yes, please, you shouldn’t buy the loaf before you’ve tasted the slices.

91. Best room for a fireplace? One where you can have a chimney. Livingroom is great, and I’ve seen houses with them in the bedrooms but that’s pretty posh.

92. Do you want to get married Eventually maybe.

Why’d you stop short of 100?

[hgfstreamchats]

Cool Cat Saves the Kids

Lusey: it was a fun little party ^^ thenightetc: Thank you for hosting! Starscreamapillar: Thank you for hosting. thenightetc: And goodnight. Knock Out: Of course! Knock Out: Goodnight, everyone. thenightetc: Ratties! Knock Out: Hello there, night human! thebes: My goodness how cute! thebes: Also, hello! Knock Out: Hello, thebes human! thenightetc: They're so... small. thenightetc: I need 20 of these righ tnow. Knock Out: So, do they have tiny little human hands or do you all have oversized rat hands? How does that work? thenightetc: Neither, they have tiny racoon hands. thebes: precisely Knock Out: I feel educated. caffienatedconfetti: I WAS IN THE BATH WHEN I HEARD THE NEWS OF COOL CAT Knock Out: You heard right! caffienatedconfetti: I GOT HERE AS QUICKLY AS I COULD

caffienatedconfetti: what is this thenightetc: Art. caffienatedconfetti: this is insanity, rats don't eat in tiny chairs thenightetc: So I hear we're in for a treat! Knock Out: Some might call it that. caffienatedconfetti: daddy derek's demon spawn caffienatedconfetti: in this house, we call it Daddy Derek's Unholy Demon Offspring Knock Out: I'd just like to take this opportunity to point out that the stream doors are now locked. caffienatedconfetti: poor child thebes: What auses me most is how some por soul had to go shopping for fursuit-ized clothes thebes: fursuit-sized thenightetc: Or make them, I mean why not caffienatedconfetti: why did he have to rop children into this caffienatedconfetti: they didn't ask for this caffienatedconfetti: kILL IT WITH FIRE thebes: pity the child actors thebes: for they have crap agents caffienatedconfetti: it's a PRINTED SIGN, why would it need finishing touches thenightetc: They should have made it an animated cat. caffienatedconfetti: YOU'RE NOT HOLDING ANYTHING caffienatedconfetti: he is absolutely gonna murder her thebes: they didn't have teh budget for animation. They did, however, apparently have a fursuit lying around thenightetc: Look at those cold, dead eyes caffienatedconfetti: BWOOP! STALKER ALERT! caffienatedconfetti: i sense sarcasm caffienatedconfetti: o lord caffienatedconfetti: why the laugh caffienatedconfetti: the laugh wasn't needed caffienatedconfetti: that sounds like a scam you idiot thenightetc: SURE. caffienatedconfetti: ...ewwwww Knock Out: Cool Cat is a fountain of bad advice. caffienatedconfetti: eeeewaWWWW caffienatedconfetti: EEW thenightetc: uhhhhhhhh thebes: Just listen to this organic, flowing dialogue. Flawless, I tell you caffienatedconfetti: i feel unclean thenightetc: Do her parents know about her "friend" caffienatedconfetti: why this caffienatedconfetti: his name is BUTCH caffienatedconfetti: BUTCH thenightetc: Well, don't just sit there!  Run him down! caffienatedconfetti: well, at least his name isn't Chad caffienatedconfetti: how can he be school president, he's a thirty year old man in a cat suit thebes: You know what really gets me about this failure fiesta? it's an adaptation. caffienatedconfetti: .....daddy? thenightetc: Ain't no rule that says a thirty year old man in a cat suit can't be school president! Knock Out: Does your society normally let people like this near schools? caffienatedconfetti: the best part is soon approaching caffienatedconfetti: watch the background caffienatedconfetti: closely thebes: We don't want to but they have to do it in front of witnesses before we can stop them caffienatedconfetti: side note, why are they brooklyn caffienatedconfetti: why this caffienatedconfetti: you can build a sandcastle WITH YOUR HANDS caffienatedconfetti: seriously watch the background, this is gonna be great thenightetc: shut up you're like twelve caffienatedconfetti: ....EW caffienatedconfetti: EW caffienatedconfetti: watch closely caffienatedconfetti: WATCH caffienatedconfetti: did you see Knock Out: Best character in the movie. caffienatedconfetti: the guy walked out of his house, saw cool cat, and backed up slowly thenightetc: ...I didn't see, what happened? thenightetc: Oh! caffienatedconfetti: WHEN NO ONE IS LOOKING thenightetc: "but if you're trying to impress someone, feel free to do whatever" thebes: So many bad ideas at once caffienatedconfetti: YOU HAVE SOMETHING SPECIAL INSIDE YOU thenightetc: Is it a xenomorph caffienatedconfetti: oh my god it's daddy derek Knock Out: I like how they didn't eat any of it. thenightetc: PFFFFFFFFFF caffienatedconfetti: hOO0OHOO  MY LORD caffienatedconfetti: NO caffienatedconfetti: THEIR LAST NAME IS LITERALLY CAT caffienatedconfetti: HIS WIFE IS A CAT thenightetc: His "wife"?  A cat. Knock Out: """""Wife""""" caffienatedconfetti: EWEWEWEW caffienatedconfetti: end my life thebes: Daddy Derek has absolutely no problems with implying he had biological offspring with a giant cat thenightetc: I mean, now we have Bojack Horseman, so in a way this is just ahead of its time caffienatedconfetti: or he's just a very kinky *** thenightetc: He has a "cool cat is the coolest" sign on his bed caffienatedconfetti: IGNORE HIM caffienatedconfetti: IGNORE HIM Knock Out: He makes *me* look modest. Starscreamapillar: The slag is this? caffienatedconfetti: sin caffienatedconfetti: ohwait caffienatedconfetti: i forgot caffienatedconfetti: it's Daddy Derek's Demon Spawn Knock Out: Too late to back out now, Starscream. Knock Out: Also, hello. caffienatedconfetti: the cat's voice is almost as unpleasant as yours Starscreamapillar: Ha. caffienatedconfetti: NICE EDITING, NERD caffienatedconfetti: TELL YOUR PARENTS YOU IDIOT thenightetc: And they can tell HIS parents all about how their kid's a little criminal Knock Out: Or whatever those people are to you. caffienatedconfetti: he's not a criminjal he's just an afy caffienatedconfetti: aft thenightetc: Vandalism, though! caffienatedconfetti: he's like 10 Starscreamapillar: Are you certain? caffienatedconfetti: his name is 'Butch' caffienatedconfetti: and he has a chubby baby face thenightetc: DOG thenightetc: It's a dog! thenightetc: TWO dogs! caffienatedconfetti: DOG caffienatedconfetti: aww the dog is gone caffienatedconfetti: """"FUNHOUSE""" Starscreamapillar: I do not want to go to the funhouse. caffienatedconfetti: it's code for "sex dungeon" thenightetc: "mom and dad" wait who's this guy, then caffienatedconfetti: daddy derek thenightetc: Oh gosh, they're in the same frame.  They DID spring for two costumes! thebes: btw, they only had the one costume for Cool Cat, so they had to splitscreen this bit caffienatedconfetti: ooo caffienatedconfetti: so they DID have just one costume thenightetc: ...What. caffienatedconfetti: OW thenightetc: Are you serious, because that's hilarious caffienatedconfetti: OW Starscreamapillar: That phone does not date this at all. thebes: yeah, after they shot all the col cat scenes they went back and swapped out the t-shirt for a dress and badly applied lipstick caffienatedconfetti: it's not real lipstick caffienatedconfetti: they're cloth lips Starscreamapillar: Does he have a shirt with himself on it? thebes: I know, but they look they crap regardless thenightetc: can't relate caffienatedconfetti: he has many shirts with himself on them thebes: look like crap, meant thenightetc: God, that bathroom is HUGE caffienatedconfetti: nice edit, nerd caffienatedconfetti: sexismmmm thebes: clearly someone thinks human women can't compare to perfect cat housewives caffienatedconfetti: nice typing, nerd Starscreamapillar: Cool Cat loves to wear your skin. Knock Out: Hah! thenightetc: My eye keeps being drawn by that "Cool cat loves you!" sign caffienatedconfetti: Cool Cats wants to be inside you thenightetc: Did they cover up the Apple logo with the Cool Cat sticker caffienatedconfetti: probs thebes: MUSICAL NUMBER ENGAGE thenightetc: Actually, I can see why Apple wouldn't want to be associated with this caffienatedconfetti: no one wants to be assosiacted with this Starscreamapillar: Eploding from the inside out was in fact, less painful than this musical number. Knock Out: He's swinging that guitar around like he's trying to fend off a swarm of bees. caffienatedconfetti: remove the bees thenightetc: oh no Starscreamapillar: . . . . Knock Out: ... caffienatedconfetti: got nothing, huh? caffienatedconfetti: i've seen starscream dance, he ain't much better thenightetc: This music is familiar caffienatedconfetti: admittedly, he didn't have horrible greenscreens Starscreamapillar: An alternate perhaps, but not me. thenightetc: I mean, not while he's singing, but Knock Out: That's a base libel on Starscream. caffienatedconfetti: https://img00.deviantart.net/94c9/i/2012/352/2/0/tfp___starscream_dancing_by_flyscream-d5oes9l.png Starscreamapillar: Ah yes, the slender alternate. caffienatedconfetti: ohhh are you boxyverse? Starscreamapillar: No, I believe my universe is called 'Tyran' in the multiverse. caffienatedconfetti: tyran... hm thenightetc: Ahhhh. caffienatedconfetti: not much into the transformers multiverse, haven't watched any of the shows or read the comis in a while thenightetc: What if they just left him in that greeenscrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrwhat caffienatedconfetti: oh my god are you bayverse Knock Out: Somebody save those cars. caffienatedconfetti: please tell me you're not bayverse caffienatedconfetti: it's all that comes up when i google it Starscreamapillar: Sometimes it is referred to Bayverse, yes. caffienatedconfetti: OH MY GOD] caffienatedconfetti: HAHAHAHA caffienatedconfetti: did they add in screaming children thenightetc: I feel like this story has gone wildly off the rails caffienatedconfetti: also, forgot to add, my urge to sass starscream has never been stronger thebes: it had rais? caffienatedconfetti: knowing that he's is from the world of Face Eating Prime Knock Out: This story could't have less to do with anything. caffienatedconfetti: jesus the bayverse bots look like someone upended a truckload of car and plane parts into a bipedal shape Starscreamapillar: Weirder things have occured than Prime's killing sprees and collection of ripped off faces. caffienatedconfetti: it's been forever since i saw the movie caffienatedconfetti: i only saw the first one caffienatedconfetti: ohohoOHOHOHO MY GOD YOU HAVE TEETH, THEY LOOK LIKE GOPHER TEETH caffienatedconfetti: to be fair, the others aren't much better Starscreamapillar: Because your own teeth are surely so much more sensible. caffienatedconfetti: at least mine are straight, nerd thenightetc: So is the bullying plotline coming back, or is this just about how "great" Cool Cat is now caffienatedconfetti: noonoooONONONO EW caffienatedconfetti: EWEWWEWEWW caffienatedconfetti: EWEEWW thebes: SO WE NOW KNOW SOMEONE SAT DOWN AND WROTE THAT FOR A KIDS MOVIE caffienatedconfetti: specifically, daddy derek wrote it thenightetc: Oh, you know!  Just a little something for the parents. caffienatedconfetti: my mom gave me a bayverse optimus toy by mistake Starscreamapillar: The bully returns? caffienatedconfetti: i buried it in the mud where it belongs lol caffienatedconfetti: nice grammar nerd Starscreamapillar: The cat could just stand up, and kick the bully in the face. caffienatedconfetti: he is a thirty year old man in a cat suit, i'm pretty sure he can overpower a small chubby 12 year old thenightetc: PFFF Starscreamapillar: Lies on the internet? Who ever heard of such a thing. thenightetc: Surely not. thenightetc: And if he were a real cat that size, he could just eat the bully thenightetc: Or like, half of him.  Leave the rest on his parents' porch caffienatedconfetti: yes caffienatedconfetti: accuracy caffienatedconfetti: oh lord he has eyebrows caffienatedconfetti: BEAT HIS ***\ caffienatedconfetti: i can't stay guys, gotta go take the dogs out and get to bed thenightetc: Now that you've drawn my attention to those lips I can't look away.  :( caffienatedconfetti: lol caffienatedconfetti: night yall caffienatedconfetti: starscream, do something about those teeth thenightetc: He's going to call him WHAT Starscreamapillar: Get slagged. caffienatedconfetti: love you too! thenightetc: Goodnight caffienatedconfetti: night@ Knock Out: Good night, caffienated human! caffienatedconfetti: knockout can give you beauty tips ehehhehe thenightetc: Fish swim upstream to spawn.  So... thenightetc: Is this poem about a fish orgy Knock Out: I like his broad daylight bedtime Starscreamapillar: Their neighbours must hate this weirdo in a cat costume screaming in the backyard all day about fish. Knock Out: A lot of "friends." thenightetc: They just have a fire extinguisher mounted in the corner thenightetc: In the hall thenightetc: Haha, it falls over thenightetc: And now it's mysteriously back upright Knock Out: Oh Unicron, no! thenightetc: How Do You Do Fellow Teens thebes: It just keeps GOING Starscreamapillar: How long is this nightmare? Knock Out: The ride never ends. thenightetc: "Hey, this costume doesn't have any teeth.  Do we really need a tooth-brushing scene?"  "Just fake it, it'll be fine" thenightetc: Oh, oh! thenightetc: Is this the one that ends with the bully getting run over? Starscreamapillar: He loves to eat babies. thenightetc: Eat him, Cool CAt! Starscreamapillar: So they take him away. thenightetc: "where are your parents, kid" Knock Out: Wasn't the human who played the shady police man a porn star? thenightetc: What's shady about arresting some child who you didn't see committing any crimes? Starscreamapillar: He didn't arrest him, he just placed him in his car, and took him away. Probably to the 'Funhouse' thenightetc: Lucky stick? Starscreamapillar: The traditional treasure poking stick. thebes: this special runs off of wrong ideas Starscreamapillar: Maybe they find a corpse. thenightetc: Ha! Knock Out: "Fat time?" Starscreamapillar: Tell me that bully shoots himself. Knock Out: Or shoots Cool Cat. thenightetc: That would be a hilarious twist Starscreamapillar: Yes, handle that evidence with your bare hands. thenightetc: I'm sure a random gun somebody threw in the bushes wasn't used in a crime or anything, come on. thenightetc: Isn't it a bit unfair for an adult to enter a contest for children Knock Out: Incredibly so. Starscreamapillar: To be fair, he seems developmentaly challenged. thenightetc: "Violence solves everything" Starscreamapillar: Primus, there's more... thenightetc: Uh oh Knock Out: No, but we can't sign off without watching this. thenightetc: Uhhhh Starscreamapillar: Excellent. Knock Out: And there you have it. thenightetc: A happy ending Starscreamapillar: I shall never rest easily again. Knock Out: Mission accomplished. thebes: that was several times too long for that plot Starscreamapillar: Thank you for hosting this evening's nightmare fuel, I cannot say why I kee coming back. Until next time. thenightetc: Goodnight! Knock Out: Good night, everyone! thenightetc: You do spoil us with these. thebes: good night!

[bwicblog]

AH: ⋛⋋ it ⋌⋚ AH: ⋛⋋ is ⋌⋚ AH: ⋛⋋ TIME!!! ⋌⋚ AH: ⋛⋋ https://youtu.be/Woeao_ZLlR8?t=31 ⋌⋚

AH: ⋛⋋ ur welcome ⋌⋚

MN: thE fuck did .I just walk into

AH: ⋛⋋ magic. ⋌⋚

MN: that looks lEss likE magic and morE likE somEonE nEEds to lay off thE mEad

TT: shouldn'T you be busy (\/)rushing on your besT friend bird boy TT: lololoplololololololololo

AH: ⋛⋋ um???? excuse u???? ⋌⋚

AH: ⋛⋋ i dont have a crush on caelon thats dumb ⋌⋚

TT: you TT: heard TT: me TT: nerd TT: bird

TT: youre dumb

AH: ⋛⋋ ur dumb >:v ⋌⋚

TT: no you

AH: ⋛⋋ also MN u wouldnt recognize magic if it was right in front of ur nose ⋌⋚

AH: ⋛⋋ http://taimatrolls.tumblr.com/post/139073378698/edward-glock40-hands-finally-this-meme-gets-an ⋌⋚

MN: .I. rEcognizE thE magic of intErnEt mEmEs

AA: omgggg, that shit is classic.

AH: ⋛⋋ hell yeah!!! ⋌⋚

AH: ⋛⋋ finally. ⋌⋚

AH: ⋛⋋ someone who understands tru beauty ⋌⋚

AH: ⋛⋋ ;v; ⋌⋚

AA: y. only one flaw: therne's, like, zerno birnbs, dude.

AA: so lemme ftfy.

AA: https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=-TcLxlkc2pA

AH: ⋛⋋ dyhfcjfkg ⋌⋚

AH: ⋛⋋ lmao ron ⋌⋚

AH: ⋛⋋ like if u cry every time ⋌⋚

TC: Lemme smaaaaash

AH: ⋛⋋ no ron ;< ⋌⋚

AH: ⋛⋋ go find becky :/// ⋌⋚

AH: ⋛⋋ http://taimatrolls.tumblr.com/post/133649685023 ⋌⋚

TC: You wa~t sum fuk?

TT: This is The dumbesT sTuff ive seen and i've seen rikkin in person

AH: ⋛⋋ i guess u havent seen urself in the mirror lately then lmaooo ⋌⋚

TT: yeah i have and i am beauTiful

AH: ⋛⋋ (=v=) ⋌⋚

TT: even when i am asleep on sTarla's (\/)ou(\/)h i look fanTasTi(\/)

AH: ⋛⋋ so u dont mind if i post those snaps here then ⋌⋚

AH: ⋛⋋ (ov~) ⋌⋚

TT: i mean sure, i am jusT hoping ThaT you donT geT Too jealous

AH: ⋛⋋ why would i get jealous??????? ⋌⋚

TC: After~oo~ drama - ! love !t

TT: be(\/)ause i goT To be (\/)loser To sTarla Than you were able To geT To (\/)aelon duh

MN: oh .MY. god thE mEmE magic is too strong MN: no .I.m out .I. haVE to kick somEonEs ass byE

AH: ⋛⋋ ???? ⋌⋚

TC: OOOOOOHHHH

AH: ⋛⋋ what u cuddled her? ⋌⋚

AH: ⋛⋋ big deal ⋌⋚

AH: ⋛⋋ ive known her for sweeps n shes kinda cuddly to me too nerd lol ⋌⋚

AH: ⋛⋋ besides, why would i be jealous of u when i got a face like this just saying http://68.media.tumblr.com/40772c20bdf201449fb18ddc8d14d4de/tumblr_oatnerlI131sjachbo2_400.png ⋌⋚

TC: The gree~ o~e has a po!~t, they're adorable

AA: !!

AA: !!!!!!

TT: and i am adorable Too i am jusT Trying to find my phone

AA: omg, arne you the kid frnom the alley?? >:}

AH: ⋛⋋ (~vo) ⋌⋚

AH: ⋛⋋ ... ok first of im not a kid just bc im short!! im almost 8 ⋌⋚

TC: A small l!ttle w!ggler

AH: ⋛⋋ second of all idk??? who r u??? ⋌⋚

AH: ⋛⋋ ur just jealous im younger but still more beautiful ⋌⋚

AA: i am supern fucking wounded you obvs did not google my shit. like, supern supern wounded. like, knife thrnough the pumpbiscuit wounded.

TT: http://i.imgur.com/PoQgD4B.png TT: yeah i am sorry buT There is more Than one horse in This (\/)uTe ra(\/)e okay TT: and i am in The lead

AH: ⋛⋋ ???? ⋌⋚

AA: ~// HELLO CITICINS!!! \~ AA: ~// THE SPARK IN THE NIGHT HAS RETURNED AGAIN!!! \~

AA: ~// (Hi! Who are all of you? :D) \~

TC: Who the fuck

AH: ⋛⋋ i still win taskur get lost bye ⋌⋚

AA: siparna!! duh. AA: unless yrn anothern fluff topped grneenie. in which case, _lmao._

AH: ⋛⋋ and uhhh??? i mean i meet a lot of ppl in the alley- ⋌⋚

AH: ⋛⋋ OH ⋌⋚

AH: ⋛⋋ ITS U ⋌⋚

AH: ⋛⋋ :DDD :D :DD ⋌⋚

TT: hey (\/)an you guys shuT The fu(\/)k up and pay aTTenTion To me

AH: ⋛⋋ no ⋌⋚

AA: ~//I PAY ATTENTION WHEN I WANT TO PAY ATTENTION!!!\~

AH: ⋛⋋ and my name is rikkin uvu ⋌⋚

AA:~//Cool I'm Tallow :D \~

AA:~//Does anyone here like Supertroll\~

TT: i haTe all of you

AA: ~//Wildfire spots his newest archenemy\ ~ AA: ~// The likes of which can almost be compared to the aquatic atrocity \ ~

AA: see, i know a rmiccin, so I was like: nnnn that is T Ö T E S not the name, and AA: uH. >:}

AA: dnw, tt, i think the pupa likes you.

ID: let's pay even less attention to tt and pay attention to me.

TC: H! S!para

AA: ~//I'm not a pupa I'm 6 shut up\ ~

AH: ⋛⋋ omg ⋌⋚

TC: Go away Hadea~

ID: hmmm.... nah.

MD: Dude no that's still pupa age. AA: ~//Who asked you!!! >:C \ ~

AH: ⋛⋋ brb i gotta check on the food ⋌⋚

TT: ki(\/)ks dirT everywhere

TC: Gasps

AA: SDLKosdfhsdfkjf;sdf jldfskjlkjlkjlJ AA: sdlkjFSDLkAHAHAAHHHH AA: ~//THE VILLAIN HAS TRIED TO CUT OFF MY LINE TO MY ALLYS!!\ ~ AA: ~//THIS IS WHAT I MUST DEAL WITH IN MY HEROIC PURSUITS!!!\ ~ MD: Or you could try not playing dumb wriggler games in public chats MD: That works too

TT: (\/)hill

AA: arne we all rnoleplaying now?? AA: bc i'm outies, holy shit.

ID: as a guy wearing fairy wings right now.

TC: I roleplay that ! have a soda

ID: i can say you're all losers.

AA: ~//What \~ MD: What

TC: !s th!s how you do !t

AA: ... did you make a hat forn yrn lusus??

ID: no, asshole is getting enough love. people keep fucking feeding him.

AA: and n, n, you gotta say I DUMP THE CAN ON TC'S HEAD AA: duh.

ID: instead of me. it's a fucking travesty.

AA: they'rne feeding him and yrn not stealing the food??

AA: ~// Why are you a fairy? \ MD: Why are you wearing the wings in PUBLIC???

AA: wtf, it's like yrn not hungrny at all. f a K e.

ID: i don't eat hay sip.

ID: i'm fae as fuck right now.

ID: peeps keep asking me to make them wings though lol.

MD: Tallow I think we should lea:ve AA: ~// Why??? >:C \ MD: Because you're too little to hear about this AA: ~//AM NOT!!! \

TC: ! stop AA from dump!~g the ca~ o~ my head a~d the~ dump !t o~ the!r head

TC: Yay, we're roleplay!~g!

AA: ~// Wait what??? D: \ MD: Not you, dumbass.

AA: fucking success. see, we'rne prnos now. AA: beeteedubs, I totes meant TT. wtf all you peeps got TS for??

MD: Was any of that actual words.

TC: Do~'t make fu~ of S!para

MD: I'm not. MD: I'm asking what language Sipara is speaking.

ID: sip get to the faire already. =>:I

AD: oO hiiiii~ Oo

AD: oO it's looking very red in here today~ Oo

AA: I'm like an hourn out, fuck offffffff.

ID: red is best so.

AD: oO well red is very pretty so! Oo

AA: come out and fight these cullbait fucking drniverns so they'll stop drniving like they'rne petting theirn goddamn lusus with both hands, and, like, we will be therne S Ö Ö N E R. >:}

ID: tell them the fucking fairy prince will have their heads. =:P

AD: oO pfffft what Oo

AD: oO are you a fairy princess now Oo

ID: prince.

AA: n idk, ad, but you can lrnn2rnead orn stfungtfo, ikwim.

AA: >:P

AD: oO well i'd love to learn to read Oo AD: oO but i don't think you sound like a very good teacher! Oo

AD: oO but my sincere apologies for dishonoring the fairy prince Oo

AA: girnl, i am the best schoolfeed evern, soz. >:} AA: and yyy, good, will shout out abt the fairny prnince next time someone rnefuses to pass.

AA: strnike F E A RN in theirn H E A RN T S.

ID: on it.

AD: oO yes of course Oo AD: oO you cannot pass through this Oo AD: oO the court of the fairy prince Oo AD: oO who is really very scary! Oo

AD: oO may his sparkly powder sprinkles spell your demise Oo

ID: i feel like i'm being mocked. =:P

AD: oO of course not sir fae Oo

ID: good. because like. having fins is just as weird as having wings.

AD: oO hehe Oo AD: oO if you say so~ Oo

ID: totes did. is anyone here actually at the fair yet.

AA: phern is at the fairn alrneady, he got therne, like. yesternday?? AA: bc he does not believe in nornmal shit like S L E E P I N G.

AD: oO i just got here! Oo

ID: i'm having a hard time finding him. but then i haven't looked at a map. because stalls are distracting.

AA: his boytoy might be therne too, idefk. >:} uhh. prnobs the mossball.

AA: .. idk anyone else.

AA: call him!! AA: orn go chill with bubbles. strnangern dangern, whassat.

ID: i am having my stranger danger meter filled already, no bubbles needed.

SS: (I want it on record that texting and driving is, like, extra terrifying when its on a vehicle that definitely requires both hands to steer.) SS: (And on a totes unrelated note, I think Sipa might be anglin to kill us both! (\quq/) )

ID: what a way to go tho sip. i guesss i should call pheres. see what my getup is going to be.

AD: oO did you at least remember to wear your helmet Oo

TC: Psst Hadea~, what w!ll you be wear!~g there? ! wa~t to f!~d you so ! ca~ stuff po!so~ !vy dow~ your sh!rt

ID: that's implying i'll be wearing a shirt!

TC: Oh that makes th!~gs so much eas!er!

ID: =:P just enjoy the fucking faire and try to have fun for once.

ID: without hurting someone.

ID: you fucking weirdo.

TC: God ~o

AA: W E H A V E A R R I V E D.

ID: finally.

AA: don't sass me, brnah. therne was trnaffic. AA: and lal squalling in my flaps, A N D on my phone. AA: did you know he texted me to say, i was going2fast??

AA: like, stfu, stop starning at the speedometern and look at yrn damn phone. >:P

ID: i am all sass. i am the s a s s i e s t.

AA: n, soz, p surne that goes to prnisma.

ID: prisma isn't here to defend the crown so i rule. =>:P

AA: wherne you at, anyway?? AA: turns out i totes lied, btw, phern was off doing goth shit and not at his booth at A L L.

ID: no fucking wonder i couldn't find him. i'm at the shopping area.

SA: someone said my name.

SA: I woke up from my nap specifically becauseof this.

SA: I'm joking, my clairvoaynce is not that strong.

ID: are you at the fair yet?

AA: but is yrn clairavoyance??

AA: >:P

ID: i hope you didn't nap through your stop.

AA: .. how the fuck did you nap aftern drninking coffee??

AA: cappachino. w/e.

ID: maybe caffeine doesn't afect prisma too.

AA: i think he fell asleep again. so, like, obvs it doesn't. >:}

AA: orn else he needs to pourn morne down his chute.

SA: Sorry, I was unpacking. I am at my hotel now, actually.

SA: The caffiene only worked for so long.

SA: I will... change soon, and then I will go to the fair.

SA: Yes?

AA: yyyyyyyy.

[ayyoitsalex]

Chapter 4 - Perks of Being Caffeinated

Moving all the way out to North Carolina hasn't exactly been the easiest thing in the world, and even though Sophia is here too it's just not the same. We go to rival schools, and that here means a whole lot. North Carolina and Duke are the biggest rivals in the state, with some people taking it to extreme lengths. When I got off the plane in Raleigh, I was wearing my Duke cheerleader shirt, and someone wearing a UNC sweater literally just stared and gave me the finger. Like what the actual fuck am I right? It's not all bad, I got set up in a pretty sizable dorm suite. Albeit I share with three other girls. Two bedrooms, a bathroom, a living room, and a kitchen. It sure beats the hell out of some of the dorms I saw when I toured here last year. Now I bet you're even wondering why I even chose Duke. Valid question, and yes while I did receive offers from other school for athletic scholarship as well, Duke was the farthest away. It's not that I didn't want to be close to my family, I just saw it as the biggest leap out of my comfort zone. And I did feel a certain connection when mom told me that my grandma was accepted here, though she didn't finish since she got pregnant with mom. I'd been named after my grandma, so I felt some kind of responsibility to make sure I made her proud despite not having known her. -First Day- The sound of girls arguing outside the bathroom had become a typical sight in the mornings. I heard my three other roommates; Becca, Rachel, and Erika all with first day jitters and desiring to look their best. I on the other hand could not give one less fuck. I had an eight thirty class, and I was determined to go in comfy clothes. I sprayed dry shampoo in my hair, and ran a brush through the tangled mess growing from the top of my head. Once I looked somewhat presentable, I put on some yoga pants and a tank top and picked up some breakfast on the way to class. "See you guys later." I said, picking up my keys on my way  out the door. I locked the door behind me, throwing on my sunglasses to complete my ensemble. I left early enough that i could stop by the Devil's Brew. It's the local coffee shop by campus that I've come to love. Had to get my early caffiene fix so I could be a person in front of a class today if need be. I came up to the counter and said; "Yeah, hi can I get a large blue devil latte?" "Can I get a name please?" The barista asked. "Natalie." "Ah that's my sister's name." Useless small talk is like the bane of my existence before I've had my morning coffee. I literally hate everyone and everything until I'm fueled up. Though I  was a good girl and smiled back at the barista. Waiting on my caffiene is the absolute worst, but it's all made better when I hear my name called. The warmth of the coffee cup against my hands almost warms up my heart so I'm not a fucking asshole to the rest of the world. I cheerfully now made my way across campus to my first class. I took a seat in the middle of the pack of students as we awaited the beginning of our lecture. I wasn't quite sure what I wanted to major in just yet, so for the most part I was just taking general education classes. First up, sociology. "Welcome to Soc 101, I'm going to be your professor." The teacher stood up at the white board, proceeding to write; Mrs. Bradley in big letters. "And first off I'd like to say I wil not be allowing drinking or eating within my class, so young lady if you will." I groaned internally, but stood up slowly and went on to throw away my cup of what was four dollars and fifty cents. "Thank you, and your name please dear?" "Natalie. Natalie Ryan." "Well let's just mark you as here." The way she spoke was oddly nice but at the same time felt a tad condescending. Whatever, I remembered what my mom told me before I left for school. DO NOT GIVE YOUR TEACHERS ATTITUDE, SABRINA CANNOT SAVE YOU HERE. Class went by pretty quick, and I walked by the trash where my lonely coffee was slowly dying. I wept a little inside for the loss of caffiene. I moved forward, and just settled on a pepsi from the machine. I had a cheer meeting next, followed by a gymnastics practice. For only doing this for a year and a half now, I honestly feel incredible. Also the leotards make me feel sexy, not to sound weird or anything. Getting back to the dorm, it was finally quiet with everyone either taking some kind of nap or glued to some kind of screen. I walked into my room and saw Becca sitting at the desk with her headphones on. We waved at one another, but she was clearly too busy for a conversation. I let her be, and got on my laptop. Nathan and Selena were both online, so I messaged them both. "Heyyy!" It took a minute for both of them to respond. "Hey Nat!" Nathan replied. "Yola Natty, how's the first day?" "Eh it was alright, just school." "Have you guys talked to mom and dad today?" "Nah not yet. I have practice soon." "How's being back at Stanford with Sam? YOU GUYS SEXING YET LOL?!" "OMG STOP ITTTTT LOL. SAMS LITERALLY RIGHT HERE." "JESUSSSS WHY AM I IN THIS CONVERSATION WITH MY SISTERS?!" "LOL sorry just figured I'd ask. And hey atleast if you did she can't get you pregnant. AHEM NATHANIEL DO NOT IMPREGNATE KELSEY." "I hate you guys so much rn." I could feel that Nathan wasn't having it, so I let off. "Anyway, I'll text you guys. I'm going to practice." "Bye twinnnn! Throw the things! xD" -Nathan has signed off- "Omg lol. Bye Nathan. I gotta go too. I have a shift at the library." "Alright fiiiine. Leave me!" "Overdramatic much? lol I'll text you." "Kbyeeee love you." "Love you too." -Selena has signed off- I sat up in bed, and Becca finally set down her headphones. "You wanna grab some food?" Becca asked, stretching her arms out. "I'm thinking of pizza." "Yeah I'm down. We gonna bring Rachel and Erika?" "I don't know. Maybe haha. YOU BITCHES WANT SOME PIZZA WITH ME AND NAT?" "YES!" They both yelled back. "Answer your question? C'mon let's go." I threw on my leather jacket and gallavanted with my roommates. It was fun walking around the streets of the city. It was just so much different from what I was used to. We got a table at the restaurant, and naturally I scanned the place for eye candy. Sadly if you're wondering at this point I am not still dating Wes. Wes and I both decided it was going to be hard for both of us to continue being in a relationship. It was mutally agreed, and I have no ill feelings toward him. Just as sadly everyone was pretty fuckin ugly, so color me disappointed. "What're we having tonight ladies?" We all looked at one another and mutually agreed on half pepperoni and half supreme. "One large with half supreme and half pepperoni please?" I spoke for the group. "Alright, I'll send this right in." "Thank you." We all replied. “I still don’t understand why we couldn’t get hawaiian..” Rachel moped slightly.  “Because no one likes pineapples on pizza Rachel!” Erika snapped. “I do...” Rachel hung her head for a moment, but it quickly passed. A few minutes after waiting, a basket of breadsticks and wings came to our  table, and we all looked at one another confused.

"Um..excuse me we didn't order these.." Becca said awkwardly. "These are from that table of gentlemen over there." They waved over at us smiling like a bunch of drooling dogs. Right now I'm not really in the market for a boyfriend. I'm more into window shopping and admiring. Y'know like any broke college student. Our pizza arrived a bit after and we all mowed down dinner. Gotta love the athletes metabolism am I right? Eat pretty much anything in sight. When we paid the bill, I noticed the group of boys following behind us. They sped up to catch up with us. "Hey hope you enjoyed dinner." One of them flashed a toothy grin. "Yeah it was great, thank you for sending us that stuff." Erika loved humoring people. "Well how about we all hang out? It's still early." I looked down at my watch that read eight-thirty. "Mm..I don't think so...I have an early day tomorrow." I pulled on Becca to get back to the dorm. "No wait." One of them grabbed my arm, pulling me back. "I think you all might owe us a little." "Oh yeah? For what a couple of pieces of bread and some chicken?" I scoffed. He gripped my arm tighter. I pulled slightly, and he wasn't getting the signal. "You really need to let go of my arm. Or I'm not gonna be responsible for what happens." "What's that-" BAM! My foot soared up right in between his legs, I think I might've heard a crack as his voice went up a few octaves. "When a lady says no. You take it as such." He laid there in a fetal position on the ground as the rest of them dispersed. I rolled my eyes as we walked back laughing as to what just happened. Some people just don't get the message, and if it means I gotta break some balls to get it across then so be it. I fairly warned him. If this is any signs of things to come in my new life here, I'm not sure what to think.