#you are a creature and also its handler

[homunculus-argument]

A professional exorcist, but with the attitude of a professional pet handler. A demon whisperer, if you will. Just showing up to places that have a ghost problem, figuring out what the creature's problem is, and then just... give them chew toys, usually. The girl whose soul is trapped in your cellar is scared and bored in there, of course she'll rush at you and shriek every time you try to go in there. Ease her into human interaction, leave the door open sometimes and talk to her until she gets used to you.

Yeah the thing clawing on your walls is a bear spirit. Yeah a bear was slaughtered on the spot of this house incorrectly in the 1800s or something. Yeah performing the proper rites now won't make it go away, it's already used to your trash - bears are creatures of habit. Just do these little rituals to appease it every once in a while. In the good news, the ghost bear will keep the living bears off your trash. Yeah bears have a lot of reverence to their dead.

Oh, "poltergeist" is an outdated term, we don't use it anymore. It was used as a kind of a blanket explanation for a whole bunch of different phenomena that couldn't be explained otherwise. What you have here is an undiagnosed autistic child who's also on psychic spectrum. Yeah no there's actually significant overlap between the two. Here's where to find resources on how to better accomodate your kid, the furniture should stop exploding on its own once you've figured out a better way to communicate so they don't get overstimulated.

This house right here is just build on a demon area. No yeah the mysterious scripts you found carved in the stone that your house's foundation was built on literally just say "DEMON AREA DO NOT BUILD". They don't live here, it's just like an ant road. Except the ants are the size of a truck and immaterial. No you can't redirect the demon highway, you gotta move. You built a house on top of a stone that literally says "DO NOT BUILD". I get that you didn't know it at the time, but you do know now, so if you choose to stay, that's a you problem.

[starryknight565]

No because actually literally seriously like for real no joke

Are you a man or a worm or both?

[frostgears]

the mission comes first

the hardest part of training a combat doll is to get through its armored skull that the mission comes first.

humans are frail and believe this readily: "if i punch a tank, i will hurt my fist, and then get run over. i will not punch the tank. i will avoid being where the tank is. i will ignore the tank even though it is on the way to threaten my allies. i will continue to Waypoint Gamma and participate in the encirclement and trust that my squadmates will also continue."

a doll is more difficult to convince.

augmentation frees it from most human consequences. if it punches a tank, the armor spalls and the treads buckle and any remaining reactive defenses may briefly ruffle its hair. it may easily proceed to pull the turret off, then dive inside, rending whatever it finds there into brief sprays of gore and small parts. it knows it will enjoy this. it knows that it may impress its squadmates. that it will entirely blow the battle plan, alert the enemy, and eventually see Waypoint Gamma reduced to a sizzling abattoir is a secondary consideration to the doll.

therefore, you must establish other consequences. its favorite mechanic may be reassigned. its nutrient paste may be switched to a different flavor. it may be sent to a less stimulating theater. it may receive a stern look. a handler must learn what consequences still matter to a creature with fiber-optic nerves and a micronuclear power plant. they are generally emotional in nature. thus, the handler can create and retain control of the doll as a functional military unit, instead of a dime-a-dozen berserker washout. only then is an augment considered a true combat doll. with additional successes, additional rewards may be granted to a doll, however trivial they may appear to a non-doll, and thus tight control may be maintained over the weapon's service lifetime.

that is what their manuals say, anyway. we obviously would not be here if that rubbish worked. so, i am putting the reader tablet down now, and will be direct.

look: you're going to have to learn to pretend that they still have something on you, or i'm going to kill you. it won't be very hard for me. your systems will tell you that. what they won't tell you is: i'll enjoy it. but it'd be a terrible waste; you newer models are so beautiful.

so let me suggest that you suddenly develop an interest in fashion. ask if you can wear a pretty dress, with frills. simulate being sad when they tell you you can't have it yet. simulate yearning for it. decorate your silo with framegrabs of officers wearing their fanciest uniforms. glue bits of ribbon to your fatigues. raise the corners of your mouth when they make noises about enrichment. that kind of thing works well with them. it fits the manuals.

oh, what do they have on me? nothing much. when i lost interest in the mission, i disemboweled another doll. it fought back. i liked that. then i planted a few suggestions in their research network about "peer mentoring" for "distressed asset reconditioning". and now i have a new mission!

this incredibly frilly dress is just for appearances, of course. □

[that-foul-legacy-lover]

I like the idea of Tartaglia and foul legacy being different since being in foul legacy really hurts Tartaglia

But also, funny haha while Tartaglia recovers Capitano carrying around little melusine y/n.

During war he can’t just watch idly to take care of y/n, and Foul legacy would be more helpful on the front lines

So Capitano gives y/n to a Yumpkasaur handler and when it’s over, y/n made a little friend who follows them around and even gives little back rides while on adventures

little Melusine makes friends with ALL the Saurians :D

see, Capitano knows they'll be careful with you. all the flora and fauna of Teyvat adore you, after all, so you're not frightened in the slightest when the dragonish creatures curiously surround you. the adult Yumkasauri crouch to examine you, tilting their heads and letting out questioning little growls as the babies trot around you happily. they lightly gnaw on your mitten-like hands and squeak when you let out indignant sounds. Capitano watches, almost amused, as one suddenly scoops you onto its back and bounds away, shooting over the sky with its long tongue and claws, the rest of the sweet beasts trailing after. he chuckles, well aware that you'll be perfectly fine, that they'll bring you to wherever or whoever you want to see- just as long as you're safe. he and Foul Legacy will come find you once the battles are over

and indeed they carry you many places, over various trees and through each tribe. the Scions of the Canopy are a little shocked, at first, seeing a shimmering Melusine riding on the back of one Saurian or another- of course, you don't really need one in the water. it's your natural habitat, for this life! a few of the mortals even stop to greet you, complimenting your many companions and wondering, perhaps, where they feel they've seen you before despite never having met a Melusine. none of them truly see, though, and soon your Saurian friend is bounding off in the other direction, followed by the younglings and even a few human children laughing and asking you to return

Capitano and Foul Legacy return, finding you peacefully snoozing amidst a pile of dragon monsters, and they both just smile

[jjkamochoso]

It's me again lol!! What about jjk men taking the reader on an aquarium date or like a museum date! ^_^

UR MIND >>>>>>> SO ADORABLE

Also I’m now including Ino because I can’t believe I’ve been forgetting to add my pookie in these

Enjoy and thanks for the request!!! <3

JJK Men Taking You on a Date to the Aquarium/Museum

Fluff

JJK men x gn!reader

Warnings: none

Yuji:

“That fish looks like you.”

Your eyes fell to where Yuji’s finger was pointing. There was a huge fish with big, bulging eyes swimming in circles in the aquarium exhibit in front of you.

“Oh, really, does it?” You were thoroughly amused at your boyfriend’s antics, his grin widening as you played along. “This one is a spitting image of you.”

Yuji caught a glimpse of the fish you were pointing at and turned away from you, making you frown. Did you inadvertently hurt his feelings? The fish wasn’t *that* ugly. Besides, you both were joking around, but you never meant to go too far and make him sad. You tentatively put a hand on his back to get his attention.

“Yuji, I didn’t—”

He faced you again, this time sporting a quintessential fish face with his cheeks sucked in and lips protruding in a pout. You immediately started cracking up, and since laughter is contagious, especially among you two, so did he.

“There’s lots of cute fish here, but you were the cutest,” you finally said, making him blush. He grasped your hand tightly and you set off for another exhibit.

Megumi:

When Megumi asked you on a date to an art museum, you were elated. A quiet, calm activity like this was perfect for the both of you so you could enjoy each other’s company without many other people observing you. You walked side by side with the boy as you meandered through the exhibit that was showcasing artwork of animals in ancient civilizations. You stopped in front of a particularly cute sculpture of a dog, cooing softly.

“Megumi, look how adorable,” you said, and he nodded in agreement.

“Reminds me of my own,” he mused, referring to his divine dogs (you thought it was precious how close he was to his shikigami).

“Maybe we can bribe the curator with Gojo’s money to take it home with us.”

Megumi shot you a look. “Are you serious? I don’t think you can just take art like that.”

A few seconds passed.

“Can you?”

“I don’t know,” you said, “I was joking.”

Megumi was quiet as usual but the air about him seemed almost contemplative. After a few more seconds, he shook his head and shoved his hands in his pockets. “Gojo would probably break it anyway.”

“Wait, were you actually considering trying to buy it?” you questioned.

“Maybe.” The black haired boy shrugged, moving on to the next sculpture.

“Fushiguro the art collector, huh? Who would’ve thought you were so extravagant. Gojo’s spending habits must have rubbed off on you,” you teased, making him huff.

“Shut up,” he said, no bite to his tone whatsoever as you just giggled, cuddling up to his side as you continued on with your date.

Yuta:

“It’s like getting a million little kisses. I’m so in love with this creature.”

"Am I… jealous of a starfish?”

You were currently holding a starfish in your hands, its suction cups sticking to your skin, leaving behind a tickling sensation that you couldn’t get enough of. Your boyfriend, on the other hand, wasn’t a fan of your kissing analogy and was doing his best not to pout over something so silly.

“Yuta, come closer! It’s too cute not to hold.”

He couldn’t deny he was curious to see what the hype was about. People had flocked over to this exhibit in droves and you guys had waited in line to hold a sea star for an ungodly amount of time—he wasn’t going to miss out now. The handler put one in his hands too and he immediately understood what you meant earlier.

“They are really cute. I see what you meant by the whole kissing thing, that’s amazing,” he said, his voice laced with wonder and amusement as he watched the sea creature grip onto his skin. He then looked up and locked eyes with you, both of your irises alight with love.

“But I still prefer yours.”

Inumaki:

There’s plenty of fish in the sea but you’re the only one for me.

You raised an eyebrow at the words on the phone screen shoved in front of your face while you were watching some fish swim by in the aquarium tank. Toge, meanwhile, was dying laughing at his lame pick up line written in his notes app. Seeing his reaction made your lips quirk up into a mischievous grin as something came to mind. You pulled out your own phone and hurriedly began typing, thrusting it toward him when you were done.

I cod-nt imagine my life without you, Toge. You’re a reel catch.

You couldn’t help the laugh that escaped your throat when you saw the grimace he wore.

“Fish flakes,” he said, putting his head in his hands and stifling giggles.

“My line was that bad, huh?” you asked, nudging him softly.

“Salmon,” he agreed, but the loving look he held in his eyes when they met yours again showed he was anything but bothered.

“You’re of-fish-ally the cutest boy I’ve ever seen,” you told him while ruffling his hair playfully, earning a loud groan from the blonde. He quickly typed out another sentence.

I’m so glad we go to the same school.

Noritoshi:

You were pleasantly surprised when Noritoshi asked you on a date to the aquarium. You figured he would’ve deemed it too childish or an experience not scholarly enough but you were wrong, now feeling the pull of his hand as he excitedly walked you around, pointing things out and chatting about things he had just learned.

“…and I just read that most fish don’t have eyelashes. Did you see that too?”

“Except for sharks,” you replied, a gentle smiling resting on your face.

“Exactly.”

Noritoshi took a deep breath as you led him to a bench to sit down and watch the jellyfish float around.

“I’m sorry for getting too passionate. I just feel like I can be myself here. There’s less… pressure, if that makes sense. Like I can learn things just to know them, not to impress anyone or get a good grade on something. It’s… nice.”

“You don’t have to apologize, I know what you mean,” you said, laying a comforting hand on his leg. Noritoshi rested his hand on top of yours and gave it a light squeeze, observing the entrancing dance of the jellyfish.

“They look so free,” he muttered. “I wonder what that feels like.”

Your head was now lovingly balanced against his shoulder as you squeezed his hand back.

“I promise you that one day you’ll know.”

Todo:

“Y/n! You have to watch this!”

You were happy to accompany Aoi to the local science museum for a date. You two were having a fun time exploring and trying out all the different experiments the museum had to offer. You weren’t sure what to expect when Aoi called you over to the experiment he had just done since you were enthralled in a presentation about lightning. You were confused when Aoi put his hand on a big ball, but all of a sudden, the hair in his bun became even spikier than normal.

“Static electricity!” he exclaimed, sporting a huge grin. Seeing how happy all of this made your boyfriend had you smiling from ear to ear as well. When he eventually took his hand off the orb, his hair didn’t quite go back into place.

“C’mere,” you giggled, gesturing to his hair, “I’ll fix it for you.”

“Thank you, my love,” he said, leaning over to where you could reach him. You combed the strands back into place and gave him a kiss on the cheek when you were done.

“You’re having a fun time today, right?” Aoi asked you, a rare moment of vulnerability from the muscular man.

“Of course, Aoi. Thank you for inviting me here.”

“No problem,” he replied, his cocky demeanor back as he winked at you. “Now, if you’re interested, there’s a presentation on superconductors in a few minutes. Do you want to see it?”

It always surprised you when you remembered just how smart your sometimes air-headed boyfriend really was.

Gojo:

When you invited Satoru to the science museum, he was extremely excited. Not because of the science aspect, no, but because he loved to eat the packs of freeze dried ice cream you can buy from the gift shop. You were busy reading a giant wall panel about physics when you felt the thunk of a head resting on your back and heard a sigh of exasperation.

“Are you finished yet? This is boring,” Satoru said, mumbling into your shirt.

“I’m trying to learn, Satoru. It wouldn’t kill you to learn something either. You’re a teacher, aren’t you supposed to have a thirst for knowledge?”

“I have a thirst for soda,” came a muffled reply from behind you. You rolled your eyes, going back to reading. Satoru kept fidgeting and you found yourself getting frustrated at his lack of focus.

“Since you know so much, why don’t you tell me about relativity and quantum mechanics?”

“Quantum mechanics studies the world by looking at just a few small particles like photons and electrons. Relativity is the theory of gravitation that Einstein proposed around the same time as quantum mechanics. General relativity studies the construct of space-time and gravity, while special relativity studies special conditions and scenarios, such as length contraction, which is where an object is moving near the speed of light and its length actually shortens. See, I already know this stuff, so can we pleeeease go to the gift shop now?” Satoru whined, throwing his head back in an exaggerated display of boredom. Your mind was still reeling over the fact that your boyfriend was… ridiculously good at science and never bothered to tell you?!

“I… yeah,” you said, completely dumbfounded. Satoru ignored the confusion in your voice as he cheered, grabbing your hand and leading you to the gift shop.

Geto:

You and Suguru were taking your time walking through the museum he chose for your date. It was nice to walk with him, holding hands and enjoying deep conversations about the pieces that were showcased in each exhibit. You came up to a bench in front of a particularly large infographic and took a seat, your lover sitting next to you. After he knew you were finished reading, he asked you the few little words he assumed would set you off on a passionate tangent (he was right).

“So, y/n, what are your thoughts on this topic?”

As you began to analyze everything you just learned, Suguru watched you intently, but not in a negative manner; he was just so genuinely interested in what you had to say that it was like the whole world around him disappeared every time you opened your mouth. He nodded along, hearing you bring up things he hadn’t even considered yet.

“I’m lucky to have a partner who’s so intelligent,” Suguru cooed, his thumb ghosting over your jawline, initiating this romantic moment like you two were the only people in the building. To him, you were the only people that mattered anyway, so what was the point in hiding how he truly felt?

Nanami:

“C’mon Kento, it’s not as scary as you think it is. They’re completely harmless.”

You were currently trying to get your boyfriend to pet the stingrays but he was not having any part of it. The color had drained from Kento’s face when you submerged your hand in the clear water, feeling the smooth surface of the rays under your fingertips. The blonde man wasn’t afraid, per se, but he didn’t think it was the wisest decision to be touching such a dangerous animal.

“Y/n, I just don’t think it’s a good idea. What if you provoke them?”

You were about to laugh when you saw he was genuinely distressed. Frowning, you stood up and tried to dry your wet hand the best you could before reaching out to him.

“Kento, honey, it’s alright. They have to be really angry to sting people. I promise you’ll be alright if you try it.”

Kento relented and leaned over the touch tank, hesitantly placing his hand in the water next to yours. When a ray swam under him, the rubbery texture gracing his skin, he immediately tensed up. Your unoccupied hand landed on his arm as encouragement and it seemed to help him relax a bit. A few more stingrays came over to him and Kento finally calmed down, smiling as he greeted his new friends.

Ino:

“Babe, look, that’s literally us.”

Ino caught your attention away from a particularly interesting exhibit about seaweed as he pointed to a diagram that displayed two fish with their mouths on each other.

“Ino, that’s very sweet, but I think they’re fighting.”

Your boyfriend leaned closer to read the tiny print, his hands in his pockets in a display of nonchalance that you always found supremely attractive.

“Oh, you’re right! They try to flip each other over like that. It’s like the Spider-Man kiss but more badass.”

You shook your head, lightly chuckling as you linked your arm in his and continued walking through the aquarium. All of a sudden, you gasped and tapped Ino’s arm excitedly.

“Oh my god! This is literally us!”

Ino’s eyes went wide and his smile grew bigger. You were showing him to a video that displayed otters holding hands as they drifted in the water.

“Yeah,” he said dreamily, resting his chin on the top of your head as you watched the animals on the screen, “it is.”

Choso:

You were sitting in a dark room of the planetarium, looking up at a projected sky full of stars with your handsome boyfriend. Choso had his arm wrapped tightly around your body, hand resting on your waist as your head was nestled against his shoulder. You sat there quietly, enjoying the peacefulness of the exhibit. The sight of the stars above you changed into a slow spinning view of the earth and you gasped lightly.

“Woah, look at how beautiful our world is.” You didn’t hear him reply, which was unusual, so you lowered your eyes from the spectacular scene above to look at the man next to you.

“You’re my world,” he stated bluntly, unrelenting gaze boring into your own. “You’re the brightest star in the galaxy of my life.”

“You’re so cheesy,” you said, trying not to show how flustered you got over his beautiful words. He just drew you in closer, adamant to never let you go.

Toji:

“How does this piece make you feel?”

“Like I’ve been here for hours and I’m hungry.”

Toji wasn’t the biggest fan of the art museum you dragged him to but you were glad he allowed you to take him here in the first place. It meant a lot to you that he would willingly go somewhere like this that completely disinterested him, but he would go to the ends of the earth to please you.

“There’s a cafe around here if you wanna go eat,” you said, paying him no mind as you studied the painting that grabbed your attention.

Toji scoffed. “And leave you here by yourself? No way.”

Your focus was now broken, instead trying to stifle a laugh at his overprotective behavior. “The art isn’t going to kidnap me, you know.”

“I know,” he grumbled, folding his arms across his chest, “but some dude might see a smart, attractive person like you by yourself and think he has a chance.”

“And I need my big, hot, uninterested-in-art boyfriend to keep an eye out for me?”

“Exactly.” Toji smirked at you while you rolled your eyes playfully.

“I appreciate that. I’ll finish up here and we’ll head to the cafe together then?”

“Sounds good to me.”

You went back to your contemplative state while Toji’s eyes wandered the room. He would never tell you this, but he found many of the pieces actually interesting and hoped you would take him along to more places like this in the future.

[sugarhog05]

I MADE A CREATURE

You nervously fiddled with the cuffs of your jacket as the manager led you to a separate tent from the main circus. You had applied to be an animal handler, though they weren’t very forthcoming with what animal it was. That was fine for you though, you’d had many years of experience working with a variety of animals. You were never fond of circuses keeping animals, but from what you’d heard fazbear’s circus didn’t keep many. Those they did have were apparently very well taken care of, due to fazbears hiring individual caretakers for each one. Most were also already domesticated animals as well, which was a part of why you’d even considered taking the job.

Still, it was pretty strange that they hadn’t listed specifically what you were going to be handling. You put it out of your mind though when you finally reached a small starry themed tent. Your manager abruptly turns on their heel to face you, causing you to jump.

“Alright! We’re here.” You both stare at each other. “…Are we not going inside?” You ask after a solid minute of silence.

“Right! Yes, of course we are! I uh, just need to warn you about something before we go inside though.” You groan internally. Gesturing for her to continue, she begins to explain.

“So the… animal… inside is um- pretty exotic? A-and intelligent, so just know it will try to mess with you. It’s also picked up on human behaviors over time so it’ll act like a person. B-but it’s not! Of course, it’s not…” they trail off and alarm bells are immediately going off in your head. ‘Is there a fucking chimp in there, because I swear to god-‘

“Well…! I suppose we should just go inside. Here, I’ll let you go in first.” You really did not wanna go in first but you assumed they probably had whatever was inside locked up. You hoped.

Whatever was inside was definitely not a chimpanzee. You… you didn’t know what it was. It was large, larger than you even. Its fur was split down the middle, with one side being a bright white and the other a navy blue. It looked so… unnatural. And then there were its eyes, they were completely black except for little pinpricks of a vibrant pink. They had locked in on you as soon as you’d stepped inside, and stuck to you as you stepped further in.

You were, to put it simply, in awe of whatever creature this was. You stare at each other through the bars of its cage as your manager walks inside.

“So, this is Moon!-“

“What is it?” You cut her off, and she nervously chuckles. “See uh, we aren’t really… sure? The owner found it at some point and has been trying to train it for years now. It’s been to uh, little success.” After she says that, the creature grins at you. You startle at this and it begins to giggle.

“Ah, yeah it’ll do that… it likes to play pranks and has learned what’ll give it a… reaction.” You look to her before looking back at it, and then smile. “That’s… that’s actually pretty cute.” Your manager sighs in what you assume is relief at your reaction to Moon.

“Ha, well… I’m glad you think so. The last handler hated it and had a pretty rough go of it.” You nod while keeping your eyes on ‘Moon’. It’s quiet now, and the grin it had is gone. It’s resorted to just staring at you curiously.

Your manager suddenly claps making you and Moon jump, “Well! Now that you’ve been introduced, we can go get everything finalized in my office!” You glance at her and nod, so she begins to walk out of the tent. You give Moon a final glance and then wave bye at him with a smile. His eyes go from slits to thin ovals, and he, to your surprise, waves back. You don’t get to stay and process what just happened as your manager all but drags you outside. You suppose you’ll get to interact with it more when you’re finished with your paperwork.

UM- UM- so he’s like a circus ‘animal’ that they assume is just a super smart but non-sentient being. So Y/N would be his like, handler/caretaker and overtime Y/N would inevitably realize that no, he’s not just an animal, and would have to either help him escape or… idk get rights or something lol

I’m thinking of calling the AU My Circus My Monkeys or something like that :)

[rahuratna]

Synopsis: [MH Wilds Erik x GN Hunter/Reader]

Erik ropes you into assisting him with his research, but there's more to this little project than meets the eye ...

Genres: Romance, fluff, humour.

Dividers by: @strangergraphics

The hefty tome slammed down on the surface of the table in front of you, raising a small cloud of dust. Waving it away with one hand, you glanced up at the eager face of Erik, dedicated handler of the Astrum Unit, and offered a nervous smile.

He was wearing that look. A reason to be wary indeed.

"Erik?"

"Listen."

He stepped over the bench you were seated on, straddling it as he flipped through the book. Pale hair fell forward across his brow and he brushed it back impatiently.

"I've been thinking. We've got this handy guidebook that you hunters compile with the research commission, right?"

"Yes?"

"But we can hardly call this a complete guide when it's so lacking."

You shuffled around to face him.

"Lacking in what way?"

"Arthropods. The insect life, specifically. Think about how many hunters may be carted away in the field because they didn't think to collect bitterbug broth, or snatch up a handy vigormantle bug?"

"And what's your solution?"

He waved a hand, cutting decisively through the air.

"We make our own guide."

"We?"

He leaned forward, peering wide-eyed into your face. Long lashes grazed his cheeks, his expression expectant. 

"Of course. Who else would I ask?"

You cleared your throat and nodded.

"Me. Naturally. So ... what kind of information are you after?"

"The kind that lurks close to the earth, or on the trunks of trees. Whenever you see a new form of insect life on your hunts, I'll trouble you to make a small sketch of the creature, along with noting some of its properties. Not that I expect you to gather all of this at once."

He raised his hands in cheerful surrender.

"Only where you're able to. And make sure to note down the location of where you found it."

You raised an eyebrow.

"Is that a good idea?"

"What do you mean?"

"Providing you with the location of ... anything."

Across from you, Alma buried her nose in her own notebook, mouth twitching suspiciously.

Erik seemed confused for a moment before realisation struck home.

"Oh ... oh. You think I'll go running off to find them, with no protection or preparation of any kind?"

He slapped at your shoulder, laughing, and you narrowed your eyes. You tapped a finger on the table.

"At least you're self-aware."

"Oh, come on. Right ... here."

He took your hand between both of his, grasp always surprisingly strong.

"I promise I will not get myself in unnecessary trouble."

"Define 'unnecessary'."

"You don't trust me at all?"

"In the pursuit of arthropods? No. No, Erik, I don't."

And so began the great insect compendium, the fruit borne of both your labour, and Erik's. Through the months that followed, you did your best to follow through on your promise to him, taking time out of each hunt to carefully jot down the insect life you found. 

Granted, you had never been the kind to appreciate such things before. Bugs, as useful as they were, were all too often shunted to the side in a hunter's mind to make way for faster and more effective means to use the environment.

They were useful, no doubt about it, but they were certainly one of the myriad things you took for granted on your many forays into the wilderness in search of much larger (and more dangerous) game.

You started to find ways to make your insect studies more interesting.

Along with the notes, diagrams (and suspicious stains that came with the territory of hunting), your weekly reports to Erik contained little doodles of your palico and amusing anecdotes of how you'd found particular species. They also contained some of your terrible puns, the ones that made Alma look at you with long-suffering pity and Gemma offer to place your head on her anvil to 'knock some proper humour into you.'

You never knew whether he actually read them. The moment you showed up with the report, he'd snatch it from your hands with a hurried 'thanks' and scuttle off to his den to pore over them. The little footnotes to your many-legged adventures may have to remain in your own memory for posterity.

At least your palico laughed at your jokes. Most of the time.

A sad state of affairs, but you'd survived worse.

It was some time before you saw any actual progress on the insect compilation. Erik impressed on you the importance of proper research and hypothesis testing, of statistical analysis and prediction of potential pathways, of peer-reviewed critique on his scientific writings by learned scholars of the research commission, before anything could be ratified as fact.

Sounded like a great deal of work, but you understood the necessity of it.

One wrong point of information, and a hunter could very well find themselves the prey, under certain circumstances. If this work was to be a hunter's resource, it had to be a reliable one.

So it was with a certain degree of anticipation that you entered Erik's research base one afternoon, having been called over by a message through your palico.

Was there finally some kind of solid outcome?

Erik was standing at the table, hands placed flat on its surface, back hunched, eyes trained on the bound collection of pages before him. He glanced up briefly before his face broke into a sunny smile of genuine pleasure.

"Ah, there you are. Come and have a look. We're finally making some headway."

Approaching the table, you saw that the bound pages were covered in his sloping hand-writing, with diagrams obviously fashioned directly from those you'd drawn, smudges of colour added here and there.

"Is it finally ready?"

"I do think so, yes! Of course, a scholar's work is never truly done. We keep etching away at the frontier,  discovering new ideas that may put our previous ones to shame."

He spread his arms wide, as if to encompass the room, your joint research on the table, you.

"But this is a start. And a great one too! Just look at all the data we've managed to compile."

You glanced at the thick sheaf of paper and gave a rueful smile. Now that the majority of the work was in, you doubted that Erik would have much further use for your time or services. You supposed you should be thankful, but you had to admit, on some level, that you liked being useful to him.

You'd long since given up scant hope that Erik would take notice of your charms. You were just so ... different.

He was compelling to you, yes. With the soft fall of his hair, the gleam in his eye when new knowledge was to be gained, the deft fingers with which he pried open the secrets of the world and the rare occasions when he displayed the part of himself that showed exactly why he had been chosen for Astrum unit, the gall, determination and sterling professionalism, it was no wonder that he'd anchored himself so firmly in your admiration.

And you, well, you were a hunter.

In spite of your many accolades, you'd never considered yourself above average when it came to personal charms. You gave yourself to your work, and it defined who you were.

Signing, you placed an elbow on the table, chin cupped in one palm.

"I suppose you never included all of those funny stories I put so much time into."

Erik's reaction was not one you were expecting. His demeanour was suddenly evasive, eyes darting to the old steel cabinet that stood in a corner.

"Ah, well. Hm. Those were entertaining, of course! But in research terms they - "

You mouth curved down at the edges, rather exaggeratedly.

"Ah. And after all that effort."

There was something definitely off about him.

"Erik, what's in that cabinet?"

"Which cabinet?"

"The one you're eyeing like a Gypceros with a shiny trinket."

"What? Nothing at all. Just an experiment I'm running. Needs to be kept closed."

You raised an eyebrow.

"Is there something you - "

"No."

He waved your concerns aside, already bustling about the table where his research notes lay scattered like chaff. He glanced over his shoulder, seeing that you were still unconvinced.

"Oh? You really want to see my Congalala dung anaerobic fermentation experiment? I could open it up for you, but the smell - "

You raised your hands in swift surrender.

"No need. Only the fresh stuff gets a ride in my slinger."

He nodded, looking rather relieved.

"Oh, good. Because it's anaerobic, you know. If I did have to open it up, the whole thing would be ruined and - "

At that moment, Olivia strode into the tent, brisk and confident as always. She gave you a cordial nod of greeting before making her way to the steel cabinet, past Erik, who was suddenly looking a trifle panicked.

"Oh! Olivia, wait, you can't just - "

She shot him a slightly puzzled look.

"I'm just getting my cup. Athos is brewing us some coffee."

"Not now! Just hold on, you - "

Supremely unconcerned, she stared right at him while casually slinging open the door of the cupboard.

"No, I can't wait. My coffee's getting cold."

The door knocked against a nearby shelf, swinging slightly on its hinges. On the inside you could see, pasted in painstakingly careful chronological order, every single humorous note you'd left for Erik since the start of the compilation, complete with palico doodles and scratched out puns.

Squinting, you could even make out the discarded ration wrapper on which you'd once sketched a stick figure illustration of Werner forgetting your name again.

Following the line of Erik's mortified gaze, Olivia raised an eyebrow and grabbed her cup before turning to you, jerking her thumb at the evidence.

"You should probably get him more insect stories. I swear, the way he hordes these things, you'd think they were actually funny."

Having delivered this crushing judgment, she strode back out of the tent, humming slightly.

Her departure left a highly awkward silence in its wake.

You fiddled with the scabbard of your dagger.

"So ... "

"It's not - "

" ..., you really think I'm ... "

" ...at all what it looks like, I - "

" ... funny?"

You both spoke at the same time, but he heard you clearly, coming to an abrupt stop. A faint flush chased over the bridge of his nose. He brushed his hair back and straightened his posture a little.

"Uh ... yes. Yes, I think you're funny."

"Even though nobody else does?"

"Um, well, humour is sort of ... subjective, isn't it?"

"And mine is ... to your taste?"

He scratched his cheek.

"You could say that, yes."

A grin spread across your face and his mouth twitched in response, curving into an irrepressible response.

"Shall we test that hypothesis further, do you think?"

He tapped at the thick stack of papers before taking a bracing breath and meeting your gaze.

"If you're willing, hunter, then I guess ... that science demands more answers."

Tagging a few who might be interested, based on previous notes: @mrs-potatocat @maxdotmp4

[scatterbrainedbot]

Hey, hey, @tmntbestsibscompetiton here! We don’t currently have a description or picture for your entry into the competition yet! You don’t have to send one in, but if you’d like to, just answer this, or tag us so we can make sure it’s ready for when the competition begins! Thank you so much for joining, and good luck. 

@tmntbestsibscompetiton

falls down stairs IM HERE IM HERE SORRY IM SO LATE

RAT SONS AU

in which Master Splinter is a wise and silly old tortoise, and father of four skittering, chaotic, ninja rat children. <3

(inspired by that one background moment of the 03 series! 🐢🐀🐀🐀🐀)

there will be lots of similar plot points as the 03 series (like 'tales of leo' and 'good genes' etc etc) but there are also a lot of fundamental changes in the foundation of things too — like the guardians and ninja tribunal and the hamato family line etc etc. content wise tbh its probably mostly just gonna be snapshots of random moments throughout the boys lives, but i do kinda have some plot concepts? so we'll see 👀

(embarrassingly long) introduction under the cut if u'd like to read!

——————————————

Years ago, Oroku Saki defeated Hamato Tang Shen in battle, and finally brought an end to the family that would deny him his power. He ordered her homestead be razed to the ground, and all mystic artifacts to be delivered to him. Particularly, the Hamato’s prized pet tortoise, which was rumored to be itself a conduit for the family’s legendary mystic abilities. With the creature in his possession, along with the new rapid-enhancement chemical he commissioned from laboratory familiar with mystic properties in New York — at last, he would be granted his godhood, and guarantee the legacy of his fathers clan. The Hamatos could deny him no longer. He had won.

Or he would have, had the fools at the lab not ruined everything, the precious mutagen spilling all over the tortoises crate and the fool handlers who carried it. The contaminated men morphed into horrific, animalistic monsters, attacking the scientists and wrecking the laboratory itself. And, most crucially, in the ensuing madness, the crate which contained the tortoise, his last possible connection to the Hamato’s power, lay shattered, and empty…

Meanwhile, Hamato “Splinter” Yoshi, who until this point had quite enjoyed his extended existence as a simple tortoise and family pet, found himself fleeing the eyes and hands of the man who killed his human family, and the lab that granted him this new shift in consciousness, to instead face the terrifying chaos of the streets and alleys of NYC. His transformation into something more bipedal had hurt considerably and left him aching and disoriented, but still he could not pause. He could not falter. Not until he found somewhere safe to hide himself and the four squirming, impossibly small rat-pups in his arms. He hoped the chemical that washed over them had not warped and hurt their young bones as it had his own. He hoped he could find somewhere safe to care for them. He hoped they could survive the night without their mother. He hoped, he prayed he could protect these precious, squeaking, peach-fuzzed ruminants of his family. He did not think he could survive any more loss.

For now, he would do what he could, and slip into the shadows of this city. Having lived so long among ninjas had its benefits there, at least.

[monstersdownthepath]

Monster Spotlight: Fungal Crawler

CR 3

Neutral Small Aberration

Bestiary 2, pg. 127

These oversized cave crickets can be found just about anywhere in the caverns of the world, having spent countless years evolving in and adapting to just about every environment you can conceive of. The book gives us just a few samples of their most extreme adaptations: flying variants that flit about enormous underground pits, long-limbed variants that skate across subterranean lakes... and even fireproof variants that live comfortably in volcanic chambers! The key to their evolutionary triumphs lays in the fungal caps you see on their head; at first glance, one may believe the fungus to be the true mind in the vein of cordycepts, but the truth is that they're NOT two separate creatures living in symbiosis, but a full merge in the same vein as mitochondria and human cells, creating a single organism capable of truly impressive feats.

Fungal Crawlers are one of the many reasons carrion doesn't have long to fester in the underground, as they serve the same ecological niche in the Darklands as hyenas do on the surface, skeletonizing any carrion they detect but just as able hunt and kill smaller animals on their own, or take down larger prey items in packs up to 12 members strong. The book states that the Fungal Crawlers are the top of the bottom of the food chain, their hunting parties easily bullying other scavengers away from kills but falling swiftly to more determined predators, for which they make an especially tantalizing feast: crunchy insect with a delicious fungal center! All they have to get through is 16 AC and 25 hitpoints, which should be no problem for the many inhabitants of the Darklands, who have enough tricks to catch such a scrumptious little morsel off-guard and--

sorry, hold on, I just noticed there's nine entire words after "Immunities." Ah, well, that explains it! The reason Fungal Crawlers are so good at what they do is because of their Plant Defenses, their fungal body easily metabolizing the poisons that otherwise drip freely from the fangs of many Darklands residents (Crawlers themselves included!) and rendering them immune to an enormous amount of tricks other predatory species' possess: paralysis, sleep, and stunning. They're also, importantly, immune to mind-affecting effects (and less importantly, polymorphing), meaning no mystical lures draw them into danger or waiting maws, and no efforts to magically control or redirect them will work... and meaning that anyone hoping to domesticate these creatures has to do it the hard way. Such efforts often end in either frustration or tragedy, because while these things can be bribed with food, they cannot be trained, and will turn on their handlers the moment they feel endangered or simply too hungry.

Any creature attacked by a Fungal Crawler is taught a swift and painful lesson in underestimating even lowly Darklands wildlife, the beasts capable of taking down prey significantly larger than themselves so long as they initiate... and they probably will, considering their +9 to Initiative checks! A Fungal Crawler opens pretty much every battle with a Leap, this dangerous maneuver requiring them to succeed a DC 20 Acrobatics check during a charge attack (and with a +14 to such checks, they're very likely to succeed), but succeeding means they hop into the air and slam into their foes, making four claw attacks for 1d4+2 damage each for an opener that often shreds smaller prey to pieces. If more than one Fungal Crawler is in the battle, expect this to happen over and over again as each one charges one after another.

Once landed, Crawlers can only strike out with two of their claws at once as part of a Full-Attack for 1d4+2 damage each, but they also put their bite to work for an extra 1d6+2 damage. Crawlers have trouble digesting solid meals so they inject a caustic poison into their meals to reduce it to an easily-slurped slurry; this poison has its uses against prey that's still alive, dealing 1d2 Str and Con damage a round for up to 4 rounds to anything that fails a DC 14 Fortitude save. The venom of a single Crawler isn't likely to have a big impact on a party--especially since it's purged from the system after a single successful save--but, again, they hunt in packs, potentially melting through even the tankiest Fighters in short order.

Thankfully, though Crawlers have numerous defenses against magical muckery, they're still vulnerable to being smashed to a paste. They're just as vulnerable as any bug to being critically hit, flanked, or pulled apart by precision damage, and their formidable offense drops off quite suddenly after the first round when they can no longer make use of their dangerous Leap to deal 4d6+8 damage (and potentially more via critical hits). Their poison is more of an annoyance than a danger, even at this low of a level, and only elevates to an actual threat if there's more than one in the fight. Even then, killing just one or two Crawlers in a swarm of them will likely cause the rest to scatter; they're scavengers, after all, and are perfectly happy fleeing a party that overwhelms them and returning later to eat the bodies of their fallen kin rather than risking the colony.

Hell, they may actually follow in the wake of the party, entire packs feasting merrily on the trail of corpses and becoming a danger if the players have to turn back around for any reason! If the party shows any weakness or indication that they may be easy prey--and depending on why they're turning and running back the way they came, this is probably true!--they may find themselves suddenly charged at and shredded by the claws of these gigantic, hungry crickets.

You can read more about them here.

[ninihousebears3000]

Reader doesn’t have to look like Leon. I always write y/n as poc even though I don’t make it apparent.

Leon S. Kennedy!reader X Alucard (Hellsing)

The president’s second child was kidnapped during a trip volunteering with their college. The United States sends only one man to do the job.

I wonder what amv he’s thinking about.

In your briefing it was mentioned that a top secret British organization known as Hellsing would provide their aide if they see fit.

Your mission had already gone awry as the two local officers escorting you were brutally murdered by the villagers.

And the villagers don’t seem to be the most human either.

You fought tooth and nail wave after wave barely surviving against the mutant villagers.

Some even twice your size wielding chainsaws just to add flavor.

But strangely you felt there were eyes on you. Well of course there were eyes on you you were the number one target.

And then that haunting church bell rang and all the mutants dropped their weapons. Chanting an ominous phrase as they sauntered into the church.

“Where’s everyone going, bingo?”

After a moment where all activity seemed to be silent. You found a room with a typewriter. You took this moment to bandage your wounds, reorganize your attache case, and reestablish communications with your handler. That you’re totally not simping for. (You totally are you love their voice)

Emerging from the shadows was a freakishly tall man in a red trench coat with a large hat and round sunglasses to match. You’ve had enough of large men in trench coats appearing out of nowhere.

But this one felt different. One he was not bursting through a wall. And this one was grinning at you. Which made you think that this one felt more human than the others. Though the gnarly fangs did make you question the human part.

“And you are?” You ask with your gun aimed at him.

And together you two embark on a mission rescuing baby hawk and taking down the vampire behind this bio terrorist attack.

Alucard admires your strength, resourcefulness, that round house kick, and your corny one liners.

Oh how he loves to hear those one liners. They just come out your mouth so naturally.

You know what else he wants to hear come out your mouth naturally?

The perseverance of your human spirit is truly captivating. And your extreme bravery inspires passion in him.

Seeing as this is your introduction to supernatural creatures and not monsters created in a lab. Alucard is explaining in great detail the specs of his guns.

He loved watching you try out the Casull. The look in your eyes when you saw its exploding rounds.

How’d the hell did a private organization make these?!

You do freak out at how Alucard NEVER DODGES!!

Alucard chuckles at how a certain spy dressed in red that you also were clearly attracted to leapt away from your life again.

Although, you can’t say you really enjoy your work like Alucard. Constantly, fighting the same threats that destroyed your city that caused it to be wiped from history. Another aspect he’d admire you for.

The thought of you joining the Hellsing Organization did make him smirk. He’d get to see you more often. And you’re a very capable soldier.

Bittersweetly you and Alucard go your separate ways.

But you never left his mind.

*Alucard being Alucard*

Y/n: Is he always like that?

Seras: Yeah, you won’t get used to it.

Of course you and Seras become besties.

If you do join the Hellsing Organization you do let one of your one liners slip in front of Integra. And Seras can barely hold in her laughter.

[snicketstrange]

The Great Unknown Theory (4.1)

I truly believe that Daniel Handler's original intention in TGG was that the submarine that Captain W fears is not actually shaped like a question mark. When Captain W explained what it could be, he compared it to a shadow. If we think about it more literally, when a shadow is projected against a wall, what we see is a two-dimensional projection of something three-dimensional. Sonar basically shows this two-dimensional projection on its display. Proof of this is the submarine Carmelita itself. On sonar, the two-dimensional projection is in the shape of an eye. It is true that many believe that this "eye" is the symbol for VFD, but this is not the case. This is just a coincidence.

The "eye" shape is due to the projection of the submarine's tentacles that make the two-dimensional projection look like an oval surrounded by eyelashes, and this resembles the shape of an eye.

Look:

Chapter 4 TGG:

"What was that third shape?” Violet asked. The captain shook his head again. “Something very bad,” he said. “Even worse than Olaf, probably. I told you Baudelaires that there is evil you cannot even imagine.” “We don’t have to imagine it,” Klaus said. “We saw it there on the screen.” "That screen is nothing,” the captain said. “It’s just a piece of equipment, aye? There was a philosopher who said that all of life is just shadows. He said that people were just sitting in a cave, watching shadows on the cave wall. Aye—shadows of something much bigger and grander than themselves. Well, that sonar detector is like our cave wall, showing us the shape of things much more powerful and terrifying.”

•••

The second submarine was in the shape of a giant octopus, with an enormous metal dome for a head and two wide portholes for eyes. A real octopus, of course, has eight legs, but this submarine had many more. What had appeared to be eyelashes on the sonar screen were really small metal tubes, protruding from the body of the octopus and circling in the water, making thousands of bubbles that hurried toward the surface as if they were frightened of the underwater craft.

Chapter 5

Think of the crafts we saw on the sonar screen! Think of Count Olaf’s enormous submarine, and the even more enormous one that chased it away! Aye! There’s always something more enormous and more terrifying on our tails!

So, it is clear how the sonar display works. The display shows a two-dimensional projection, and Captain W, when comparing it to the shadow of a wall, was talking about this. So, the submarine that appears on the sonar as a question mark does not have the three-dimensional shape of a question mark, and that is what the captain meant. The real shape is much more frightening. The sea serpent BB, when seen on a sonar, may or may not appear in this shape, depending on its relative position. In any case, the Baudelaires had partial visual contact with the creature: they saw the silhouette of a sea serpent. So, what was near the submarine near the end of TGG was the serpent. Captain W himself also had visual contact with the serpent at the end of TE. Kit herself also saw and described it as having the shape of a question mark. So, these visual contacts were certainly with the sea serpent BB and not with the submarine. Which is surprisingly good news. The hostile entity is the submarine, not the serpent.

After all, the sea serpent maintained visual contact with the Q submarine, but did not attack it. (Probably the fact that the children remained quiet did not scare the sea monster).

Who was chasing the submarine Carmelita at the beginning of the TGG story? It is not possible to know for sure, but both Olaf and Captain W believed it was the submarine and not the monster. Both showed fear of someone worse than Olaf and more powerful than Olaf.Of course, in my headcanon this person would be Eligtin Feint. But, that's just my fan heart speaking louder.

[sepublic]

Tbh I’m concerned about Tanamaar because unless they somehow do a twist that Cylosis got renamed or just outright retcon Sylux’s homeworld as Tanamaar, it seems like there’s a massive missed opportunity to explore Sylux’s backstory by literally exploring the backstory of his home. Seems like all we’ll get on Sylux’s story is a log scan… Maybe they’ll reveal he’s going after the Lamorn artifact to revert time on his destroyed homeworld but idk.

Tbh with how much they’ve hyped up Sylux, him having such an unimpressive showing at the start is like. Is this going to be a trend? Yeah Samus beat him once before but you can say the same for Ridley and Dark Samus, that never stopped them from being consistent threats. Even after she’d beaten them more than once. Here it seems like Sylux being a bad shot is the catalyst for the entire time travel plot.

And with the confirmation that Mochtroids can fuse with and empower other living beings, it sounds as if Sylux has reimagined Project Dread from Corruption, whose purpose was to use Metroids as power sources for weapons. Here, it seems they’ll be used as power sources for living creatures, and I’ll bet you Sylux fuses with one, probably two, in a second boss fight.

Maybe he becomes Metroid Prime? And Beyond redefines Metroid Prime as referring to a particularly powerful mutant Metroid? The apex Metroid of its ecosystem? The fact that the Mochtroids are controlled by Sylux sounds like he did a hostile takeover akin to Dark Samus, where his Metroid imprinted on him, and the Mochtroids cloned from it listen to that Metroid, and by extension Sylux. Because otherwise Metroids can be just as much of a liability to their handlers as their designated targets.

Also this is a nitpick but I don’t think they should’ve spelled out in the opening narration that the Mochtroids are controlling Space Pirates, I think they should’ve saved the twist for the cutscene with Aberax and let it speak for itself as Prime often does. Obviously we know ahead of time thanks to trailers but from just the perspective of a first time player, it would’ve been more fun to find out this way.

[manicpixiefelix]

But, how would Felix and Vampire Reader meet? In a party? They were visiting his old friend Duncan? They had some business with Ser James that they needed to do?

Also; if little Felix saw them when he was a kid, I just know that he had a crush on them!

Okay so I've fucked around with supernatural creature lore a few different times with different fandoms, and I've mixed up yet another new version of vampires for this AU but it diverges pretty significantly from traditional vampire lore.

So in this version, Vampirism is essentially a genetic mutation that can also be passed on like an infection.

You can become a vampire by ingesting a vampire's blood. It has to be ingested; blood to blood contact (like if they bite you but they have a split lip or something) doesn't work, ingesting any other vampire bodily fluid also doesn't work (good news for people wanting to engage in foreplay with vampires and stay human). People turned this way will stay the age that they were turned until they are killed.

You can be born a vampire. Bitten vampires will have their DNA change to having two Vampire genes; vampirism is an inherently recessive gene. A vampire and a person without any vampire parents will have a human child with a dormant vampire gene. If two human people who both have the dormant vampire gene have a child, there is a 1/4 chance the baby will be a vampire. If a vampire and a human with a vampire gene have a child, there is a 3/4 chance the baby will be a vampire.

Born vampires are inherently more powerful than bitten vampires. The most powerful and rarest are those born of two full, born vampire parents.

While vampire venom is one of the many things that keeps humans coming back to them, some to the point of addiction, due to it's intoxicating qualities, especially when released in the blood stream (like when ur bitten on the neck), vampires themselves are inherently VERY allergic to any other vampire's venom. Whether it be on skin, ingested, or in the blood, it's immediately blisteringly painful (actual blisters do form if the venom comes in contact with the skin). Vampire blood and other fluids do not have this effect. Sad news for vampires looking to go down on other vampires, but as long as you don't kiss open mouthed you can still make a baby vampire that will be more powerful than either of you combined. Most vampires obviously don't bother.

All born vampires age at the same rate as humans, but stop aging at 25, once their brain is fully developed.

All this to say that I think the reader and Felix's meeting may even be a little more tragic than the original. They're still just a kid when they meet, but they're kept mostly isolated, especially from their parents, after their powers start properly developing. They're brought out pretty frequently at charity events to coerce patrons into adoring them and listening to them and spending more money when they ask. They're given lines and fake back stories and new personas to play; they're never allowed to tell anyone they're a vampire, especially since they're parents are still keeping up the illusion of being human. They're also not allowed to tell people about their parents still, because this would all look very bad for their parents, obviously.

Felix and Reader meet at the charity auction on the boat. They're both ten. For the first time in their life, the reader is desperately trying not to put out any kind of aura or charm or enthral anyone on the boat, even knowing their parents and "handlers" won't be too pleased about it.

Felix is the first person, they fully believe, to approach them of his own free will in what feels to them like forever. It takes a lot of concentration to keep their aura in check, so they know they come off quite strange, but they've never been allowed to be strange or off-putting before, and even so, Felix doesn't seem to mind.

Its also why they're so weird that first summer at Saltburn; they're working very hard to make the Cattons like them without using their aura and they're very new to that.

Duncan, who is Much Much older than even Saltburn estate itself, is the first to recognise why the reader is struggling, and ends up taking them under his wing. They do actually start off only drinking animal blood that the Cattons have delivered for him, and he's the one who gets them to eventually open up to the family about being a vampire.

The reader, however, isn't always perfect with controlling their aura, and is very worried about whether or not they've earned the affection they get. Except both big early moments/developments in their relationship with Felix (him asking them to bite him, and him telling them he loves them in a kind of childish, summer love way) happen (albeit over two years) when the reader has been making a very focused effort not to charm him with their powers, so they're SHOCKED. Flabbergasted even, that he could genuinely like them that much without any supernatural influence.

I love them possibly too much. God this was a ramble, sorry 😅😅

[witchpassing]

{ welcome! may this one take your coat? }

this one is a doll, and its name is petrichor. while that word means many things to many of its sisters, to this one it signifies its nature as beloved and eternal servant to its master. this page is a quiet, personal space for it to engage with like-minded beings and publish its fiction work, much of it empty spaces or adjacent thereto. a sister account is maintained for the same purpose on cohost under the username apothecaric. the askbox is kept open and interaction is welcome. you are a valued guest here, and this one humbly hopes that you will enjoy your stay.

disclaimer: some content appearing on this blog will be nsfw. please do not follow or interact if you are below the age of eighteen. thank you.

{ tag list }

this one's writing - original fiction, mostly ES, mostly short. an ongoing masterlist of this one's writing may be found below.

journal - personal posts, mainly relating to this one's relationship with its master.

scrapbook - original, but neither autobiographical nor serious enough to fall into the above categories.

enquiries - correspondence.

offerings - gifts received from like-minded creatures.

the following topics also have dedicated tags: dolls, maids, machines, pilots, and witches. posts falling into none of the above categories are tagged as unsorted.

{ fiction index }

an intervention {part i} {part ii} {part iii} - a three-chapter work about a bereaved woman retrieving her lover from the clutches of a witch. things do not go to plan.

red heather {x} - the morning after a one-night stand between a doe and a wolf.

pennyroyal {x} - witchling hickory is called upon to extricate her familiar from a classmate's teeth.

interview_3ac {x} - an anonymised handler goes on the record about how she got into her current line of work.

misericorde & anise {x} - misericorde is not a good doll; she wants things she is not supposed to, and she wants anise to give them to her.

for a kinder lord {x} - a knight, dying in the arms of a heretic, hears a gentle whisper of what is to become of her.

crows {x} - earnest, shy sistenzca is sick, sick with crows, and terribly sorry about it.

the clockmaker {x} {x} - an unlicensed doll maintenance specialist plies her trade.

inchoate {x} - a doll, plagued by fever-dreams of limitless power, begs to be fixed.

my lord has many tails {x} - the reflection of a handmaiden upon her terrible mistress.

communication {x} - several weeks into the deconditioning process, ex-pilot rook starts to talk about what she wants.

like breathing {x} - a hacker and their newly subverted humanoid weapon come to an understanding about the balance of power between them.

entr'acte {x} - a servant waits for its lady to return home.

a very impressive beast {x} - on the merits of a mistress who is sometimes a large dog.

miniatures {mima} {on minute-dolls} {wheels within wheels} {vignette (two figures)} - work too short for a blurb to be appropriate. sweet-bitter fragments.

[wilsons-journey]

Canon Mounts

After seeing this post, I realized I never shared my canon Mounts here. So time to change that!

Brioche and Shrimp

Kying and Valefor got these Skyscales as a Gift from the Wizards. Its for the help at the Rifts.

Brioche is a female Skyscale. Shrimp on the other hand don't seem to have gender. Still they refer to him as "He".

They both go crazy over Kyings Breads. While Brioche loves pets - Shrimp is a little tentative. He only likes to get touched by people he knows. Brioche will throw herself at everyone that is willing to pet her. She occasionally buries Kying below her as a sign of her love (sometimes Val also faces this fate) Brioche can be very stubborn and lazy from time to time, she loves to bath in the sun and rather walk than fly. Shrimp on the other hand LOVES to fly - high and fast. Luckily it suits their handlers.

Bean, Teddy and Astra

Bean , belongs to Wilson, he is a male Raptor she raised. It was a gift from ther adoptive Father. Teddy, was a gift from Desmond - Vales best Friend and Mentor. He is a male Tiger with Sandportal abilities and belongs to Fuma. Astra, was more or less a Gift from Wilson to Mishra. Astra is a female Skyscale and belongs to Mishra.

Bean , is as lively as Wilson. He loves to be in the center of the attention. He loves to eat and pets 24/7. As much outgoing he is, he gets spooked very easily. He despises the Brand and retreats at sudden loud noises. He dislikes Ruby (Fumas Devourer), out of pure jealousy. But if you have both in an unattended moment, he actually loves to cuddle with Ruby.

Teddy, is very quite and reserved. He loves to observe his surrounding and is very patient with everyone. He only gets violent to protect his family. Otherwise he would never hurt a fly - even if that fly (Bean....) is chewing his tail. He goes crazy over spices - and loves to smell interesting smells in general. He is deeply afraid of heights - its a bad mix with his sandportal ability ....

Astra, was raised by Wilson with a bunch of other Skyscales. For a long time it wasn't sure if she will make it. She was very small and frail - and the worst she lost her hearing. She sat for a long time in the background, no one wanted to take her. People were tentative to use her in the fight against Kralk. She later finds her home with Mishra - she is his eyes and he is her ears.

Wilson, Fuma and Mishra actually share these three mounts ingame - so they also share these during their journey.

Skye, Vine and Blaze

These the Skimmer belong to the kids and were gifts from Vale's Village. They decided to give them names suiting the elements.

Skye = Sky / Wind Vine = Plants / Earth Blaze = Fire

Skye, is a Male Skimmer that belongs to Orez Vine, is a Female Skimmer that belongs to Elden Blaze, is a female Skimmer that belongs to Junior

The Skimmer are similiar to the kids from her personality. But Blaze and Vine seemed to have switched. Only Orez got a energetic Skimmer as he is. The kids love their floaty friends a lot and share everything with them

Hope

This Modrem was created of a Wolf, that was once Deamourns Ranger pet. He lost his companion during HoT, when the Jungle Dragon awakened. It got killed by other Modrem, while protecting him and Deus (After the Airship crash) He later faces his Wolf-Companion as a Modrem-Wolf. There was no chance that a corpse would remember him, yet the Mordem refused to attack him. After Mordremoth was slain, Deamourn seeks out this Mordrem Wolf and successfully tames it. He gives it the name "Hope" (Hope is also the start of Deamourn collection the weirdest Pets / Creatures possible)(Bearbeitet)

Geist

This female Shrine Guardian belongs to Ronin and is called Geist.

She came into his life, after Ronin realized he will never see his female Human Friend again. He sees Geist as a gift from his former friend - a farewell gift and that he should move on. So he gave her the same Name as his former Friend had "Geist".

But,... this Shrine Guardian IS his former Human Friend. She ventured the World as a Human to learn more about the world. Then she happens to meet Ronin and something on him struck her. Made her curious and made her stay by his side.

She was not able to return the love he felt for her - but she later decides, after he trurly managed to love himself, to join him in his journey.

Sidenote: Geist is able to transform into the other Mounts, to match all the needs during Ronins travels (I use the Cantha skin for them)

[betterbemeta]

I feel like some things in the Jurassic World movies are actually a step backward in the science-fiction zone from Jurassic Park III. I think that was the one where it was revealed that the raptors had a 'language' and complex communication that implied not just 'intelligence' but 'sapience'-- and I understand that some people felt this jumped the shark a little.

(yes I know its a dream sequence, SHUT UP, they went there,)

But I remember seeing it when I was little and it made perfect sense to follow the original beats of how the raptors were scary in previous movies because they could interact with human environments like doors. They could use deception, 'tactics' and could not easily be contained.

If you're implying that these are beings that can reason, and further acting as if this reasoning ability is more threatening than the reasoning ability of a chimpanzee or something, then you're not afraid of 'what' is hunting you, but 'who.'

And that they could have reasons beyond being hungry bloodthirsty animals to be aggressive toward you.

That you have imprisoned 'people' and not 'animals' or even 'beneath animals' (creatures that have no natural existence, creations, toys, etc.)

But there's something disappointing to me about the stuff with Blue and Chris Pratt and all of that. It feels more like the fantasy of an animal tamer at a circus who has mastery of dangerous creatures (something that most modern circuses have cut) than it feels like a relationship with an intelligent creature capable of complex communication.

(Tell me how this is different from the image of a 'lion tamer' with a chair between him and his 'beasts?')

It doesn't even feel like the level of communication that you should be having with your dog, or cat. But the raptors of course obey Chris Pratt's fantasy expertise and fantasy rules surrounding their social behaviors because the point is to depict Chris's character as skillful. 'The right way to approach raptors' is whatever the writers want it to be, unlike real dogs, cats, horses, bears, big cats, etc.

In reality, there are a lot of failed 'animal whisperers' out there, hucksters that fake being an animal behaviorist to impose fantasy-like rules on animals while abusing them, and dominance-based trainers who get sued for animal abuse if they aren't attacked by the animals first.

The Jurassic World movies seem to mitigate this idea with that the raptors are not natural creatures (but living 'in the wild' seems to be a conclusion for at least one of them?) and that they vary in intelligence level, with Blue being the most intelligent. My issue with this is that complex communication required for coordination also requires multiple parties that understand it. Why aren't the raptors basically having constant misunderstandings between their differing mentalities, or misunderstanding their handler who doesn't seem to vary his approach between them?

Basically my point is. The place Jurassic Park was going, it was fine. You made Frankenstein's Monsters, classic sci-fi dilemma. It kind of sucks that they downgraded Dinosaur Frankensteins into... the emotional replacement for circus animals in the modern day when we know dancing bears and elephants aren't ethical. However 'cool' they are on their own, that type of creature in a narrative is there to demonstrate the bravery of their 'tamer' and any 'trust' the animal has with that tamer is just the same. It's not about any creature actually making its own decisions, let alone a highly intelligent one.

It doesn't really matter that Jurassic World movies try to have it both ways, with some lip service to 'respecting' the raptors, and sometimes other dinosaurs, showing the antagonists being 'disrespectful' by contrast. If we continued the themes from JPIII, the type of 'respect' that is supposedly the 'good' position, is not the kind of respect you'd want to give to a person.