#you cant handle photography

[knxfesck]

It's very interesting to see anti-AI discourse among artists because it really proves that a large subsection of people think that art in any form other than The Noble Anime Fanart And Adjacent Work or The Tortured Suffering is simply not worth making and that artists that dont fit neatly into these categories are lazy, fake, underqualified etc. "AI is bad because it steals labor" and yet you just told someone to lower their commission prices because you don't think their art is good enough for them to be paid minimum wage. Hm.

[dualitysdownfall]

im legally obligated to do a big dramatic sigh every time i remember that i have to get up early for school tomorrow

[leonsrailway]

hello my love! been thinking about creepy stalker leon lately <3 maybe vendetta leon! he's damaged mentally and he can't stop himself from being fixated on you. like he corners you somewhere and dubious consent things proceed. IN PUBLIC WOULD BE HOT, but they don't get caught. for a fem! reader

ive been watching you.

AHHHHH first request ate tf up. something about vendetta leon makes me blush. i hope u like!!!

MINORS DO NOT INTERACT. NSFW UNDER THE CUT

CW: smut 18+, p in v, fingering, oral (f! receiving), dubcon, semi-public sex, stalking, obsession, masturbation, leon being a creepy perv, age gap (reader is like 22), noncon photography, choking, size kink if u squint and tilt ur head

fem! reader

divider: @leonsdolly

hes not a weirdo. really! he never meant for it to go this far.

it was a random day last august when he wandered into the restaurant you worked at. but as soon as you came to his table and introduced yourself with that pretty little smile and those big doe eyes, he knew he'd been in trouble. after a short pause, he turned his charm on and started a conversation with you.

then he found himself back the next day. and the next.

he swore the only reason he showed up was for the coffee, which was the laziest excuse he could muster considering the coffee was from K-Cups, but you didnt seem to mind. every time you worked, you found your eyes glancing to his booth hoping to see his dark hair poking over the top of the booth in front of him. he could see the way your eyes lit up when you saw him, he just hoped you didnt notice the way his cock twitched when his eyes locked with yours.

during your small talk at his table, even after he learned you were half his age, he could only ever think about the way his large, rough hands would feel running all along your body, from your pretty tits, to your waist, to your thighs, to your- oh shit, what were you saying?

"you with me, Mr. Kennedy?" fuck, he loved when he heard his name leave your lips. "uh, yeah, sorry. long night. what were you saying?"

"did you want your regular?" you were smirking, almost mocking how distracted he was.

"yea, add something for yourself pretty lady, come sit with me on your break?"

leon had been a regular of your months. he looked to be in his late 30s-early 40s, and you'd be lying if you said his little nickname didnt make your knees a little weak.

"as much as id love to, Mr. Kennedy, i cant today. but i can definitely get that order in for you" you reluctantly deny his request.

he didnt appreciate that.

-

after a week of discreetly following you home after your shifts, he'd learned your routines. what time you shower in the evening, what time you have dinner, what time you touch yourself when everyone else falls asleep...

leon invested in some binoculars from the local nerd store and even found a little bush he could hide in perfectly angled to show him your bedroom. he even bought himself a new camera so he could take pictures of you when you look your best, oblivious.

when you had gone off to work one day, he snuck in right as you left. he's not sure what possessed him to do this, he used to be such a good guy. he wanted to protect and serve and... now look at him, rummaging in some 20 somethings underwear drawer.

-

you slam the register shut after counting your money for that night, it had been a long one. full of old men, not leon, telling you to "smile for them" or snapping at you for a refill of their sweet teas. everyone else had gone home for the night, and you were just about to lock up. your body ached, you felt like falling on the nearest flat surface and knocking out for the week.

until you heard the bell ding.

"we're close-" you were cut off by yourself when you saw who walked in, "oh, hey Mr. Kennedy."

theres his girl. "hey honey, you alright? you look tired" he approached you from behind.

"its been a long day, but nothing i can't handle. i was actually just about to lock up the restaurant... so.." you trail off, hoping he may get the hint that you just want to go home.

"well good thing i came in, huh?" he laughs, and so do you, but you didnt find it too funny. he was starting to stand a little bit too close to you for your comfort, even though you trusted him.

"i guess" you say, blushing when he gives you a look that made you almost rip off his shirt right then and there. but you cant, thats wrong, what would your parents think?

"you look pretty, angel" leon says, tilting your head up to look up at him. god, he was tall, and his one hand could cover your whole face.

"t-thank you Mr. Ke-"

"Leon. call me Leon"

"thank you, leon" you reply, crossing your arms, tensing up. you knew you shouldn't be feeling this way, it isn't professional.

he couldnt hold himself back anymore. whether it was the way your big pretty eyes looked up at him like a trap, or the way his hand was finally grazing your soft skin, something made him bold enough to kiss you.

"Le- Leon... we can't" you made out between kisses, as much as you were denying him, you were still kissing him back, that kept him going.

"we can't? that's too bad..." he mutters in your ear, breath fanning against your neck as his fingers wandered below your waistband, "because im gonna do it anyway"

you squirmed against him but you couldn't deny the way you mewled in his ear when he grazed your clit through the thin fabric of your panties. he laughed meanly in your ear before putting his free hand around your throat and gently squeezing when he applies the slightest pressure to your clothes clit, making you moan, "i knew you'd like that". he lays you down in a booth in the empty restaurant.

"p-lease... fuck" you tugged at his shirt, shyly asking for more. he laughs at the change in your charcter from only a moment ago, before ultimately complying with your silent request. he rips your clothes off and leaves a trail of sloppy, wet kisses from your neck, to your tits, to your stomach, and finally down to your pussy.

he gazes up at you with the hungriest eyes youve ever seen, glazed over and half lidded yet so focused on you. he makes out with your cunt, his nose bumping into your clit as he slips his tongue in and out of your hole, making lewd, borderline pornographic sounds. you were a wreck, writhing under him and grinding your hips into his face as he moaned incoherent praises into you, the vibrations making you soak his face more than you knew you could.

he eventually sticks two fingers into you as he sucks on your puffy, neglected clit, and once he curls his fingers to the spot that makes you jolt, he keeps on hitting that spot again and again and again until you cum in his mouth. he doesnt stop then, using his tongue to clean up your mess until you're pushing him away, a stupid cocky grin plastered on his wet lips.

you didn't realize you were taking his belt off until his cock was in front of you. he was big, leaking precum from his pretty pink tip and his eyes were piercing yours as he pumped himself a few times before lining himself with your entrance, the two of you gasping in tandem as he bottomed out inside of you.

tears pricked at your eyes as he began to move, the pain and pleasure and overstimulation from your last orgasm all combining and making a cocktail of sensations you've never experienced before. your head lolled to the side and you squeezed your eyes shut while leon rocked you into next year, until he just almost cuts off your airway and forces you to face him and look in his eyes as he drills into you like a jackhammer.

"ah-ah-ah-f-uuuck, Lee!" you moaned into his neck as you scratched pretty red lines down his back, making him grit his teeth to keep from letting out a whine he'd only heard when cumming in the panties he stole from your room

"i know pretty girl, feels good doesn't it?" he lets up on your throat, not that you could catch your breath at the rate he was plowing you. "y-yes- i'm cumming, oh my god im cumming" your eyes roll into the back of your head and you draw blood from biting your lip.

"go ahead princess, im right there with you" he grunts, slightly angling to hit you impossibly deeper, which was your final straw, you let out a string of curses and chants of his name as you cream his cock, he spills his load inside of you. not that you're that angry, his warm cum spilling out of you felt so nice you couldn't dare be angry.

the two of you catch your breath in silence until leon snaps a photo of your leaky cunt, both of your cum spilling onto your thighs.

[thebruno65]

Sato defence thread

I know nobody gaf about her, but the few that do despise her ass, so I made up my mind and decided to write a defence post abt her. So, without further ado... Why Sato is a more complex character than you think:

For starters, who in the world is Sato? That's probably a question 90% of all Dangan fans ask when they see me talking about her. So ill give a little background information to inform you/remind you who she is.

Sato is a minor character whom was introduced in Danganronpa 2, Chapter's 2 motive, Twilight Syndrome Murder Case as Girl E. She is known to be friends with Mikan, Hiyoko, Ibuki and most importantly, Mahiru.

But what she is more known for is being the culprit of Natsumi Kuzuryu's murder, the little sister of Fuyuhiko Kuzuryu. And its what most people point to when criticizing Sato and her behaviour towards her, most of the time saying Sato was fully in the wrong.

But I'm here to prove, or at least try to, that while murder wasn't the way to handle it, Sato had all the right to behave the way she did towards her. But before I start, I just want to clarify that I don't hate Natsumi, but it doesn't excuse her behaviour towards Sato and Mahiru.

When people blame Sato, they usually go ahead and say that her motive is weak as hell, saying that she is a generic, heartless yandere whose only reasoning is "I love Mahiru!" But that just isn't true, she has much more complexity and issues that people dismiss:

People have kind of forgotten that, despite Natsumi's and Hajime's conversation that showed a weaker side of her character, she was still not an angel. Its shown in the anime that she constantly bullied both Sato and Mahiru, and this is very clearly backed up in episode 3 where she intentionally provokes Sato to start a fight over with her. I mean, there is no way she didn't intend that.

Plus, this bullying can be dated to as far back as the photography club, I'm guessing that's like, around a year or more. So it isn't a recent thing she could just ´ignore´ like most people say, because I'm genuinely sick and tired of people saying that, like, if they met before hopes peak, then I can guarantee you that she has probably tried that before and ultimately fail. Either because Natsumi doesn't stop herself, or she genuinely cant mentally drown her our.

EVEN THEN, this is still not everything she has done, because there is still one more, pretty major thing Natsumi has done constantly to both, threatening to kill them. Ok, before anyone goes ahead and says something like "But those threats are empty! She didn't actually mean it, she is just mad". Put yourself in Sato's shoes first:

Imagine the daughter of one of, if not the biggest Yakuza clan in Japan says she will kill you to your face. I don't know about you all but id be shitting my pants and leave the country if I ever heard that. Not to mention she is also threating my best friend?

And its not like she just based it off of a simple word, she quite literally has physical evidence to prove that Natsumi, in her eyes, does not fuck around. I'm talking about the scar she gave her back in the photography club. After Natsumi and Sato had a fight, its said some men went ahead and scarred her arm.

In general the scar serves as a great way to remind Sato that "if you don't protect Mahiru, they might do something to her, they have done it to you before"

(BONUS)

Please note that, while I may have come as extremely harsh and rude on Natsumi's behalf, this is not a hate post. She is in fact a great character too, and I highly recommend checking this thread that explores her character in great detail. https://x.com/CHISALOVEBOT/status/1735610111245095022

Now, another reason as to how people misinterpret Sato and her motive is her relationship with Mahiru, her best friend. Now I'm not going to argue that she wasn't the reason to why Sato did what she did, in fact, Id argue its her biggest and most important reason for her. But what I'm trying to argue here is that it wasn't (just) because of "love"

I don't know about you all, but i find it very clear to me that Sato is not mentally stable, and this is most prominently shown when she shares her scenes with Mahiru, and how being with her has affected her psychologically.

lets talk about their first scene together, in which sato says, and I quote: "Mahiru, you're the hope of everyone in the Photography Club." At first glance, this sentence seems completely normal, but if you analyse just a little bit more, you will realize something odd... who the fuck unironically says this?

Even if its true that they are an Ultimate, one of the best at what they do. Going to extremes to say "hope" is... a bit overdue, especially speaking for everyone in the photography club. As seeing how the other reserve course students reacted when Mahiru came over, (though I do have to add it was because of Natsumi's comment) were not too sure if she truly meant everyone, or even anyone at all.

But, we can still tie this to her mentality of Mahiru, how? Well, when I said who unironically thinks this, there was an answer, and that my friends, is Nagito Komaeda.

Yes, i know, i seem crazy comparing Nagito and Sato, but think about it, they both have this support over hope, with both reminding the other ultimates that they are the "hope" of the world. Don't believe me? then look at this line said by Sato only a few seconds after the first one:

So in the end, she is not only referring to the photography club, she is also referring to the entire world. Now you could argue that she means this logically as once she graduates, her photos would probably spread around the world. But the fact that this comes right after her line about "hope" may have it signify otherwise.

Though this isn't the only comparison you can actually make between the two, as I've recently discovered that their views on the reserve course and talent are pretty darn similar too! Of course they show this in different ways.

What do I mean by this? We all know Nagito's certain distain for non-talented people right? and how only those can be born with a talent? What if i told you, this also is the case for Sato, only of course, to a lesser extent.

During the fight with Natsumi, Sato states that since the main course didn't scout her, she should give up since she had no talent and that she should "know her place" You guys see what I'm talking about?

Sato saying to know her place pretty much means she knows her role in the overall school of the academy, she is only there to support the Ultimates, be a stepping stone.

(BONUS)

Ok but like I generally find the idea of a conversation between Nagito and Sato be pretty hilarious, with Nagito going over the usual reserve shit and Sato's like "Ok that was pretty rude, you could have toned it down a little... But you're not wrong either."

Sato's sprites:

Anyways, back to my point. But then, why does Sato act like this, Is there a reason for it? And that's where good ol' Hopes Peak Academy comes in:

Its no secret that Hopes Peak does not care for its reserve course students, seeing as they just swooped both Natsu's and Sato's deaths under the rug.

Another thing that they like to do is remind them of this nonstop, where as would be with Main Course students like Nagito 24/7, Juzo when Hajime confronts him. Or other, more indirect forms.

These guys clearly think of talent and hope being the priority, then the rest after it. And Sato is a victim of this type of mentality, she puts down Natsumi and her wish constantly because she's thinking the way hopes peak wants everyone else to think. She praises Mahiru and calls her "her hope" because she is meant to be a stepping stone for the Main Course.

Now here comes a little bit of theorizing, but it will make sense trust me: This mentality has been driven so far into her brain, that it seems like a lot of the actions she takes, she always excuses it as "what Mahiru wants"

for example, every time she's arguing Natsumi, she always goes ahead and claims if she does something to Mahiru, she will not let her get away with it. Notice how its always Mahiru and not her? She quite literally cares for Mahiru's safety over her own.

(BONUS)

Can I just please gush about the genius way they made the Natsumi and Sato conflict work so well with their beliefs? Like they are quite literally the humanization of what the one of them thinks of the other:

Natsumi hates people that seem to have given up and not try to join the Main Course. Sato is someone who represents that by putting down others for them to 'give up'.

Sato hates people that don't know their place and think they can do more than what they can chew. Natsumi is someone who is openly stating to trying to join the main course as the 'Ultimate Little sister'

But, you may be wondering, "well if she cares so much about Mahiru, then what about the others? She never mentions Mikan, Hiyoko nor Ibuki in any way"

And here's were her motive becomes more complex, as I personally believe that her personality around Mahiru is more than just a Nagito complex. I'm going to throw the idea that Mahiru is pretty much the only thing from keeping Sato from quite literally existing. Yeah, depressing, right? But hear me out:

When I tell you that her first anime appearance wasn't when she slammed Hajime's desk, then what do you think it is? I bet almost none of you would have said this scene right here.

FYI, this scene plays right before Natsumi talks to Hajime about always looking out of the Main Course. (Special Thanks to @kousaka-erena for telling me abt this scene btw)

But, how does this scene signify my extremely absurd comment? You may ask. Well, lets take away our attention from Sato for a bit to look at the rest of the reserve students around her.

Notice how all of them seem to be having a conversation, or at least be with another student? Even though we cant confirm that all of these people are friends, per say. We can confirm that they are at least able to talk with one another.

Now look back at Sato, none of them are even looking at her direction, they don't even care about her. Not to mention that this is not a one off thing, she is never even seen interacting with any of the reserve course students aside from the other two.

In fact, I'm going to throw around the idea that the reserve course might actually hate her, or at least have some sort of distain. Probably from the fact that she's friends with an Ultimate.

The students are probably jealous by the fact she is able to talk to someone from the Main course. So in return, they don't talk to her out of jealousy, which in turn probably makes her time away from Mahiru extremely difficult for her.

The worst thing is that I would have glossed over this if it weren't for the fact she was in THAT position. While you could argue they did this with a writing perspective, so that they don't reveal her face until their reveal.

But if it really were the case, then why did they opt to specifically do it like this? Wouldn't it have been actually easier to just animate her with her back towards the screen talking to other students? So I believe they they had a little more in mind when drawing her here.

But, what about her other Main Course friends, Wouldn't you also count them in? Here's the thing though, apart from the Twilight Syndrome Murder Case game, do we ever see them interact? I mean, none of the 3 never seemed to really go ahead and visit her when they had the chance.

Sure, they are still seen together in the game, but how close are they really to each other? To be honest, Mikan, Hiyoko, Ibuki and Sato only seem to be friends because of proximity with Mahiru more than anything else. So I doubt Sato would have strong feelings for them either.

Like sure, she probably still respects them because they are still ultimates and all, and I'm sure she still considers them closer than anyone else, but just not by much.

And I think this loneliness also overall leaks its way into her treatment of Mahiru, with the way she feels the need to protect her at all costs, to praising her to none ends, to even hiding vital information from her:

When I'm talking about the ladder, I'm referring to Sato's and Mahiru's final scene together, which is infamously know as the retcon of Mahiru's involvement in TSMC, while I personally don't mind the retcon as much as others, Its still a blow to Mahiru's character and what she stands for in DR2.

But, lets put that aside, as were not here to talk about that. Lets instead talk about how this scene, despite not being great for Mahiru's character, is brilliant for Sato and how much she is willing to go to protect her.

So, we know how in the original TSMC, Sato immediately confesses her crime to Mahiru after being confronted. And while I can still see this in character, I much prefer her other interpretation.

In were, instead of confessing at all, she constantly hides the fact she murdered Natsumi and even reminds her how 'horrible' she was to the both of them.

Now, why do I generally find this better than the original? Because it shows you how fare she is willing to go to protect her, going as far as to hide the truth from her. The reason she does this is so that she doesn't get herself involved in it.

She even shows her the scar the Yakuza left her in her arm to gain pity and convince her to just leave the case alone. That's because she needs to protect her, just like she said before this scene.

Now of course you can always argue that Mahiru already knew about this and she just didn't tell her, but what's important is Sato herself couldn't know this, so she tried her best to not get her involved.

So, she is willing to go as far as to do this, for what? Well, I believe this goes back to the fact that Mahiru is her only true friend. She acts overprotective and obsessive over her because she doesn't want to lose her, she is afraid to.

As I've said before, Mahiru is the only thing she has left, its her only hope. So in return, she will do anything it takes for her to keep Mahiru by her side.

Now obviously, you can also deduce it to being, love, or something else. In fact, its been heavily implied that Sato is a Lesbian with the way she talks to Mahiru sometimes. But i personally found it to be this as there's just much more evidence supporting it.

(BONUS)

One thing that I also want to mention, but didn't find anywhere to fit this in, is when right after Mahiru leaves, her expression changes from a happy smile to a frown.

Which makes me thing she has also hidden her own emotions from her, maybe to not have her worry about her as she was probably told from Mahiru how her life at home is. Or it could also be that she hates lying to her. It can be anything really.

But, while this may be a lot, there is still one last push to try and convince you that she isn't your typical Cold, Heartless yandere you see the fandom depict her as: And that is she never intended to hurt Natsumi in the first place.

"But, you were literally just talking about her motives, what do you mean she didn't intend to kill her?" While yes, I did go ahead and explain her motives, I never said outright that it was to justify the death of Natsu.

In the motive, Sato says to Mahiru that she tried talking it out with Natsumi, but after another death threat from her yet again, Sato succumbed to her anger, and in a FIT OF RAGE, she strangled Natsumi to unconsciousness.

After calming down, she realised what she has done. In a state of fear and panic of the possibility of Natsumi waking up and having her send men to kill her and possibly do something to Mahiru, she kills her.

When people blame Sato, they usually say something along the lines of "omg! Sato is so dumb, why did she do that to Natsumi? Doesn't she know that the Yakuza would kill her?" And I can bet 10 bucks that these are the same guys that don't play the games.

Sato quite literally states she wasn't in her right mind when she strangled Natsumi. She was overcome by built up anger from years of bullying from her. Having those feelings closed up for so long will only make them come back stronger.

To be honest, its kind of weird to see this as Mondo Owada had a similar outcome with his murder, as he killed Chihiro in a state of anger. But one of them is regarded as sympathetic and the other a demon.

Of course its not the same, as Sato crime has two main differences that separate her from Mondo's crime. The first one being that Sato didn't kill her victim in her fit of rage, it was after.

And yeah, Sato killed her in her state of panic, which is actually pretty similar to both Sayaka Maizono's and Leon Kuwata's motive, both being scared and in a panic that they didn't think rationally and did some dumb moves.

I can see Sato in the same light as the other two, as the three of them were put in a situation where if they don't do something, a worse thing could happen to them. So thinking fast, they resorted to murder.

And the second reason, is that Mondo showed remorse for his actions, while Sato didn't... Or is at least what you'd expect from the outside. Because in my opinion, she is remorseful about her actions, she just doesn't show them.

A great example of this is the scene right after Mahiru leaves, in which Hajime confronts Sato about Natsumi. She starts of smug and states that she probably killed herself. Bur after Hajime states that she hadn't given up, her expression changes to an odd one you wouldn't expect.

Her face turn blue and she starts to state that he is wrong while she grabs and shakes her head in what seems to be in distress. So answer me this, would a person who is cold and heartless react like this?

Sure, you could argue that she is acting like this because she got caught and knows what's gonna happen to her. But I don't think that's the case, as we have seen her breaking down in that fashion before.

I'm referring to day 4, in which we see when Fuyuhiko kills Sato. She starts screaming for forgiveness while running away. And I don't know how to explain it or if its just me, but they feel different for some reason.

Like the one we see in Danganronpa 3 has more depth and a different reason for it. What do I mean by this? Well, this is purely a theory, but when sato started saying "You're wrong" she wasn't talking to Hajime, she was talking to herself.

She is trying to convince herself that she was right on killing Natsumi, trying to convince herself she did the right thing. That she's protecting Mahiru, but deep down, she probably regrets taking the life of another.

So in conclusion, Sato is more than just a 2-dimensional character with a complex motive. But since she isn't given a lot of screen time, she sadly gets thrown aside by the fandom. Which is something that I wish to change.

And that's everything I have that I can convince you all. If your opinion has changed about her, for the better or for the worse, then I'm glad I was able to change it!

If you guys have any criticism, like I yap too much or my points may not make sense, feel free to speak out and tell me, its my first time doing one of these and I'm open to change.

And if you liked my post, then feel free to follow me! I wont promise to make threads like these constantly, but I talk about Danganronpa a lot!

Uhh anyways, Sato is peak, the student council is peak, sato should join the student council and kiss every women in there, platonically and romantically. (Kisato my beloved)

[dropthedemiurge]

I shit you not, I shed tears and my heart hurts because of Boston this episode 🥲

He tried so hard. He tried his best. He never wanted to ditch Nick since they first met, he kept placating and leading him on and manipulating because he didn't want to lose Nick, no matter what status.

He was always honest with himself and with Nick, and that's why he could never say grand lies about loving forever, one and only. But he did his damn best to make Nick happy and feel loved, even when he was shocked and hesitant about his long "boyfriend duties list", he tried to fulfill everything. And he enjoyed spending time with Nick.

He admitted himself it's the first time he allows someone to be his boyfriend, binds himself to someone with the meaningful title and promises to do his best for all the time they've got left, because he knows he can't promise forever.

But it's not enough for Nick, who might be into red flags and who thought he could handle an open relationship but realized after all that he couldn't. It's not his fault but there was something he didn't notice or appreciate, thinking all the time spent with Boston was a waste.

Boston's one and only true passion that he knows for certain he wants to have in his life, who pushed with it despite anything, something that never leaves or betrays him, that makes him feel good and proud, unlike his friends - photography.

Photos are Boston's creations, that's the biggest way how he expresses love. He can't say it, he never had surroundings that embraced being gentle and encouraging and saying love words. Boston is confident with taking photos, he puts his heart in it and gives them to the very few people who he cares about in his life.

It's a shame that those people don't speak his language. Shame that they can't look past who Boston is as a person, aren't willing to accept, and can't ever think he might be enough, that his ways of loving might be enough.

Nick returns him THE Photo that Boston always used to indicate his feelings and clearly cherishes, as he rejects him and his boyfriend dream on New Year.

Friends accept the Photo that he sends from USA to congratulate them, yet they don't seem impressed, neither they accept Boston back as their friend or try to mend relationship with him themselves.

Excuse me, why all I think about how it's so unfair to leave BostonNick as the only couple without happy ending and to tell Boston that he should always stay alone because no one wants to put up with him as a person - who separates sexual desires with emotions and struggles with communication - or patiently work through adjusting their love and life together?

I wasn't even rooting for Boston in the beginning of the show, BUT! Hell, to me even Top and Mew have more potential problems living together - with their rules, with Mew's superiority games - and less feelings than Boston and Nick.

What I want to say? Neo Trai is THE motherfluffer who brilliantly played both happy enamoured slutty Boston and his heartbreak, hurt and forced solitude in just one final episode.

I cant. ಥ_ಥ

[cloudcutter]

smile for the camera - p.sunghoon

chapter 11 - new project

“your outfits!” you cried at the same time sunoo pointed to jungwon and yelled, “your hair!” a silence settled for a brief moment before the three of you dissolved into laughter, sunghoon and jay smiling fondly.

“your outfits look great, guys. maybe i’ll have to incorporate you into some group shots together,” you mused with a wide smile.

“anyway, wonie, what’s with your hair?” sunoo asked, leaving you to begin setting up. as jungwon explained how he was bored of his red hair with jay listening quietly beside them, sunghoon found his way towards you.

“hey pretty. need help?” he asked, kneeling down beside you. you flashed him a quick smile and nodded.

“yeah. set that light up over there for me, will you?” you asked. he nodded and did as he was told as you fiddled with your camera. he watched with a small smile as you took test shots, adjusting the lighting as you went (at least he thought. he knew nothing about photography.)

“alright!” you said, clapping your hands together, drawing everyone’s attention to you. “sunoo first. i’m gonna probably add in everyone else, just because y’all have cool outfits that kind of match in my head for this shoot. so feel free to… i dunno, frolick around?” jay laughed at this, which caused your grin to widen.

“i’m gonna go get waters for everyone since someone forgot,” jungwon announced. “jay is coming with me. and sunghoon—“

“sunghoon is staying right here,” the dark haired boy quipped, causing your younger friend to roll his eyes.

“fine. jay and i will go get drinks and snacks. be right back!” jungwon and jay set off, jungwon happily chatting as jay listened contentedly by his side. sunghoon settled in the grass as you directed sunoo to the spot you wanted the pictures taken. he watched on as you smiled encouragingly as sunoo put on a bright smile for the camera, posing every few seconds. he noticed your attention to detail and the way you’d reach out to smooth a wrinkle in his shirt or curl a piece of hair back towards his face.

“hey, lover boy. you look ridiculous.”

sunghoon was snapped out of his gaze by jay, standing next to a snickering jungwon. “i was just watching,” he mumbled, running his hand through his hair. jungwon flashed him a knowing smile.

“she’s good, isn’t she?” he asked. it was clear jungwon was proud to be her friend. sunghoon nodded, fixing his gaze back on the girl in question.

jungwon seemed to take this as an invitation to continue bragging about his friend, which sunghoon did not mind.

“she’s been taking pictures for as long as i can remember. i’m sure her and soobin have been doing it for even longer than any of us probably realize. she’s just really passionate about it,” jungwon explained. he snickered against casting a sly gaze towards the older boy. “i feel bad for whoever she ends up with because i have no clue if she’ll ever like anything more than photography.”

“you cant judge her for that when you’re the same with dance,” jay scolded, nudging jungwon and causing him to laugh and agree.

“wonie! quit chatting and get over here! i need my two cuties in one picture!” your voice interrupted the boys and jungwon grinned brightly. he abandoned his older classmates almost immediately, bounding over to you and sunoo, who was talking excitedly.

“were you guys talking shit?” you asked, suspicious of jungwon’s wide grin.

“no, no! just sunghoon’s stupid pining, that’s it!” jungwon shook his head as he spoke, making you giggle. sunoo let out a groan.

“god, he’s so embarrassing. if he ever makes you uncomfortable, please let me or any of his friends know and we will set him straight,” he said, shooting a glare to his clueless friend who rolled his eyes in response. you offered him a small smile, shaking your head.

“oh, i can handle him. don’t worry. i get free drinks out of this deal so it’s okay,” you assured him. sunoo raised an eyebrow.

“i know he has an ego and i won’t disagree he needs to be taken down several notches,” he started. he paused and you both cast a quick glance over at jay and sunghoon, the latter who was laying in the grass, laughing at something jay had said. “but something tells me he’s being for real when he says he likes you. and he is my friend. so i don’t wanna see him too hurt. so don’t lead him on too strongly, yeah?”

sunoo’s words caught you off guard. you had assumed he was just joking around. but if sunoo said something, did that mean maybe he wasn’t?

before you could press farther, jay’s voice interrupted. “hey, are we almost done? i’m hungry. my dad gave me money to treat everyone to dinner.”

you resumed your shoot, directing sunoo and jungwon around before finally inviting sunghoon and jay over.

“sunghoon, c’mere,” you murmurered, waving him over. his dimple pressed into his cheek as he smiled, trotting over to you. he opened his mouth to say something snarky when you reached out to smooth the collar of his jacket, busying yourself with fixing the small flaws in his appearance.

his breath hitched in his throat. you were so close to him right now. he wanted to tease you but he chose instead to relish in the small, focused smile on your face as you fixed his hair.

“all good! sorry, just wanted to make sure everything was perfect. back to your position,” you ordered teasingly and he gave you a mock salute, still unable to find his voice.

“are you blushing?” sunoo hissed when sunghoon rejoined the group. the taller boy shook his head defiantly.

“nope. definitely not. let’s hurry this up please, i’m starving.”

previous | masterlist | next

smile for the camera: in which you don’t believe sunghoon could have feelings for you so you challenge him to prove it before you both graduate.

a/n: i always am so scared to post written chapters bc what if my writing sucks LMAO but here is a chapter that despite my nervousness to post, i am pretty proud of! trying to keep the rivals/enemies thing going as long as i originally wanted but if u couldn’t tell both y/n AND the author (me) are starting to crack and can’t help but like hoon … enjoy <3

ALSO SO OFF TOPIC FROM ENHA BUT HOW ARE WE FEELING ABOUT TXT COMEBACK BC SOOBIN HAS ME GOING INSANE I ADORE HIM

tag list: @yenqa @sungookie @lomzy5 5 @lilactangerine @aki1e @lunakua @blossomnct @dimplewonie @diestheticu @viagumi i @nobodyshallenter @judeduartewannbe @beebop-uwu @marcelinesakura @bwljules @flower0930 @adajoemaya @simp4sim @tobiosbbyghorl @calumsfringe @moonlighthoon

[spookyserenades]

I’VE NEVER WANTED TO PUNCH SOMEONE IN THE SKULL MORE-

but I wanna punch u in like a loving way ya know 🥹🥺🙈🙊🙉😭

i-

ok i didnt have time to talk abt last chapter, but honestly all u have to know is that i loved every single word, every punctuation mark, every period, every space-

omg this chapter was wild i cant-

yoongi and y/n, I’ve never met a couple whose good and bad at communication at the same time i cant- no cause like him writing a song for her bc of her, when he played it i imaged Butterfly for some reason, the melody is so beautiful on the piano 🥺🥹 omg not him with his shirt off at the b-ball court. He rlly flexing huh, yeah sure ur too HOT 🥵 omg she got a vision, LIKE HER MOM! Will this be a reoccurring theme with her? Oooo. OMG THAT FIRST KISS WAS SO SWEET WHEN IT SORT OF CAME FULL CIRCLE WITH YOONGI ASKING HER TO KISS HIM! AND THEN HIM ASKING FOR MORE OMG ITS SO HOT WTF I KNOW I SHOULDNT BE THIS HORNY YET BUT UR WRITING IS JUST 🤌🏼 💋 THEY ARE IN LOOOOVE FR LIKE WE KNEW THEY BOTH HEAD OVER HEELS, SO HEAD OVER HEELS THEY COULDNT GET SLEEP FOR WEEKS/DAYS~ OH MAN SECRET RELATIONSHIP YEAH WELL-

omg wtf yeah secret relationship went down the drain lol. Either hobi’s hearing is super good and he’s near the room or everyone heard y/n fucking whining into yoongis mouth dam. Or he saw that quick kiss in her room omg ur cliffhangers dana drive me INSANE! Hobi is such a tease too! Now him teasing her for her heart palpitations poor girl cant handle all the handsome men around her like same girlie pop-I do wonder how this will effect the hybrids dynamics with each other and her 🤔

omg jinnies b day he deserves the world. Not him feeding her, he KNEW what he was doing and in FRONT of everyone too 😏 him warming up her hands with his breath i cant- and then going to take cooking class in February. HIM SAYING HE DOESNT WANT TO GO WITH ANYONE ELSE BUT HERRRR 😭 him saying lets go home bc home is smth he never truly haddd and he feels safe mow eeek😭😭😭😭

Omg not tae driving the way home- KNOWING THE WAY HOOOME. No cause like you can tell they probably all know the way home by heart bc they cherish her and the house sm its means so much to them i cant i actually had to stop reading after that line bc i got so emotional. Omg tae is taking his photography seriously 🥰 im so glad hes really delving into his passion! Omg their ID’s lol they must be so cute and funny 😆

ofc jimin is a responsible cutie we love, cant wait to see more scenes with him later~ but him saying y/n looks good in any photo ✋ stop sir u are such a charmer i cant- eeeeeek

omg joonie so cute. He cares for her sm and he’s the type of person to not beat around the bush. He cares and wants her to be straightforward when shes upset 😭 eeeek

omg the scene with jk- i LOVE BANTER SM and their scenes always crack me up. Jk’s dialogue is so fun! No not her giving the puppy dog eyes 🥺 and it not working… or maybe it did 😏 omg and her being bold with that KISS ON THE CHEEK- i was imagining jk when he gets surprised or zones out 😲 its so funny 😂 omg y/n has W Rizz for sure~

omg ben already predicted this my mans was just waiting for her to catch up- its so good to see him again I love y/n’s friends. Him lifting her up but also humoring her is SO what i would do if my friend was in a similar situation! Like Y/N GIRLIE POP I ARE THE IT GIRL U GOT NOTHIN TO WORRY ABT!

THANK YOU SM FOR THIS UPDATE I LOVE U SM DANA!!!!! KEEP UP THE GOOD WORK!!! Remember, make sure to take care of urself first and foremost! 😤 Love you byeeee~

FDJSKAFHDSAF I GIVE YOU PERMISSION TO PUNCH MY SKULL LMAO!! I'm so so happy that you loved the last two chapters, there was SO much that went down, I can't wait to chat about them hehehe 💜

SO fhdjsaf you're right on the money with Yoongi and MC not knowing how to communicate with each other for SHIT. Like I think they rely on telepathy or vibes too much, neither of them are mind readers... so much of their conflict these past two chapters could have been resolved if they just sat down and talked calmly about things for an hour or so!!! 💀BUT stop it right now Butterfly is one of my favorite BTS songs, so so gorgeous on the piano, and I could imagine a very similar melody that Yoongi would write for MC being something like that too. 🦋

HNNNNGGGFF Yoongi all sweaty on the court without his shirt.... damp long hair....teasing MC the whole way UGH I just know that I'd be drooling! 🥵And with that vision WHEW I'm so happy I could incorporate that into MC's character finally, I will say that this is something that will begin to happen more frequently for MC-- ever since she has been diving more into her spirituality and practices, her psychic abilities have been getting stronger.

The kiss. THE KISS!!! I'VE BEEN DYING TO WRITE SOME ROMANCE FOREVER NOW MY GOODNESS IT TOOK 13 CHAPTERS!! I just feel like Yoongi is such a 0 to 100 kind of guy when it comes to kisses, sweet and tender to begin with, then BAM super passionate and intense. I really really loved writing that scene, I'd say that Yoongi was truly desperate and yearning for MC for so long that he couldn't help but beg for more hnnnnngggg. But now they have to tip toe around for a little bit until they figure out how to tell the others, which turns into MORE yearning and AH I wanna chew on my drywall!!!! 👹

djkafdakfdask I'm excited to continue off where we left off! You know I always gotta leave you all on a cliffhanger. I wonder how MC is going to dodge Hoseok's questioning, and we don't know if he heard those two making out (he shouldn't have been able to, the music room is soundproofed...) or was perceptive to how weird MC and Yoongi were being with each other. I also feel like if Hoseok heard them, some of the others would as well, and I can think of a few (Namjoon, Tae, Seokjin for ex.) that would probably bust down that door!!! But also your theory of Hoseok possibly catching their kiss in the hallway is something that could have happened eeeee. Also I love teasing Hoseok as well he raises my blood pressure... poor MC can't even hide her heartrate from them!

UGH Jinnie's birthday he's such a sweet darling, I love that he was able to go out somewhere yummy to eat and spend time with everyone. I also really love when he feeds MC... it's so hot to me idk why like yes PLS grab my face and stare at me and treat me like a princess Jin!!! Always making sure she's warm, wanting to go to the cooking class with just her, and feeling truly at home with her and in their house I CAN'T He's just such a love. 😍

Tae baby... just like Jin, he knows where home is now and AH they're just all getting so close. You're so right, they really cherish her so so much. Tae and his photography too is so fun to write about, it's nice that he gets to express himself creatively and the other hybrids let him take their ID pictures was a sweet hidden moment that I'm happy you noticed!

Definitely more Jimin on the way!! It's been the Yoongi show for a bit, but that's just how I've planned these few chapters. Don't worry, each of them will get their turns to be the stars, which I'm super excited about in the future! Charmer Libra Jimin is my Roman Empire, totally more of a flirt and a romantic as time goes on. Joon UGH!! My little wolf, he's warmed up so much to MC, and he's very straightforward and stern like you said-- ever since the Incident, he seems to be very concerned about weather or not MC is feeling upset.

HA I love writing MC and Jeongguk's interactions, they're both such little shits and you can tell when they get on each other's nerves, but it's less antagonistic these days and more playful. He totally called her out for pouting, and while it might work for some of the others, it doesn't on him LOL. But she got him back with that kiss, huh? I bet she's been dying to do that for months...

I'm PSYCHED you mentioned Ben. He's my favorite side character to write, and it's nice that MC is able to confide in him about any of her worries. You're right, he totally caught onto her having crushes on all of them (it's probably dead obvious to him) But ahh it makes me so happy that you love him as well!! I agree, I'd probably act the same way towards MC if I were Ben-- teasing her but trying to encourage as well. 🫣

FDJAKSFH THANK YOU FOR READING AND SENDING ME SO MANY LOVELY COMMENTS!!! As always I look forward to what you have to say about updates, and I love you sm as well! Hope you had lovely holidays and a fun new year my sweets! 😘💜

[ellerevelle]

hello again

Its been an eternity. I had to login with my yahoo email. My YAHOO. email. 

I’ve been sitting in the same position, at my computer, slouched over watching netflix for hours now. Not accomplishing a damn thing except panic. I’ve been enjoying the program I’m watching but continually keep checking my phone. As one does. 

I check Instagram to look for that little red message notification indicating a new DM. Its not obsessive, but I do feel relieved to see someone is there. I’ve been alone in my room, day in day out, for what feels like months now. I go to work, I go out dancing occasionally, but all in all, I’m lazing in my bedroom. Its basically my studio apartment, despite living in a 4 bedroom rented house. 

I’m here to journal. Because my life needs an entire overhaul. I really wonder whats wrong with me. Today I examined a LinkedIn job listing for, upon reading the details, is like- THE job. THE DREAM JOB. And I have no qualifications. 

If I had even remotely TRIED. AT ALL. the last, oh I dont know, TEN YEARS OF MY LIFE to do anything actually photography work related, I’d be maybe closer to qualified. But despite talking like I’m an artist, despite going to goddamn art school, despite telling myself or others I meet “yea I’m a photographer,” ... it has to be what you DO. As a VERB. And my cameras literally, absolutely, are coated in dust. I havent handled them in over a year. Probably more. 

What is wrong with me. I read the job description, I even took a screenshot of the listing for when it goes down, because I want to dream about it. Study it. But it says at the top of the list “at least 5 years of experience.” My last five years? have been bullshit. I’ve just gotten fatter and lazier and probably less mentally healthy. I mean, I’m barfing my thoughts on Tumblr again, I’m probably not okay. I’m here feeling like I’ve squandered my fucking years, that my life needs a genuine total overhaul. I am not mentally healthy. 

Why. Am. I. Afraid. To. Move.

Not move away, but literally MOVE. Work out, create, explore my city, meet people, even pick up a new book. I’m afraid to move. 

I need to clean my car. Its gotten out of hand. She doesnt deserve it. I feel like everything I SING about loving, I’ve stopped living up to. I talk about going on road trips ALL THE TIME. I feel like by letting my car fall into terrible disarray, I’m betraying myself. If I were to try to take a road trip, I’d have to do so much work. SO much work. Its so cluttered, the trunk is full of old clothes and weird concert souvenirs and random tupperware and literal trash. I need to vacuum it, I need to dust it, I need to clean the glass. I need to empty the entire thing out. I am afraid to do the work. I am unmotivated to do the work. 

Want to know what I’m thinking about why:

I want someone to care. 

I feel like I dont exist anymore. Like... no ones asking my any questions, no ones noticing me out there doing anything, I dont feel witnessed, I dont matter. So its really difficult to find motivation to do something that no one cares about. Which I dont mean to sound like the cliche “if you cant instagram it, did it really happen?” “if the tree falls in the woods but no one was there to see it, did it make a sound?” 

Its a vicious cycle, I observe, because in not doing the thing I think no one sees or cares about, the thing I CARE ABOUT definitely never happens and, therefore, doesnt exist to be cared about or seen at all. 

If I threw a party and nobody showed up, and quit throwing parties, then NO ONE would show up. Wayne Gretski “You miss 100% of the shots you dont take” la la la blah yes I know. 

Its so fucking scary. I feel so goddamn freaked out. I feel so obvious. Everyone wants to be loved and noticed, obviously. I’m in part afraid of no one caring, but also I’ve become so egotistical in a way- that if I AM seen, I want to be seen right. I want the right people around me. 

I’ve been dissappinted about people I’ve met or who has noticed me in this town. Again, ego, but like... I dont get hit on here. And those who DO, are AWFUL. I drive home after a night out and think - THAT guy? thought he had it to ask me for my number?

Not to sound cruel. But I’m talking like, total like... icky dudes. Or just blah dudes. 

I sparkle, and I want to share it with somebody ... whats a better way to say “with somebody who matters”? Because that sounds horrible. I dont see myself as some queen diva champion, but I just... have a lot and have lived a very interesting life, and I feel like its just kindof. Stopped. 

I hear some voices say that inspiration is bullshit. waiting for inspiration is an excuse. but like. 

what... how... HOW? How to just go and do things anyway when theres SO MANY THINGS THAT CAN DISSAPOINT YOU. SO MANY THINGS THAT CAN DRAIN YOU. SO MANY THINGS THAT CAN HURT YOU. SO MANY THINGS THAT CAN LEAD YOU ASTRAY. 

So in lieu of this fear, I’ve done nothing. I miss feeling fearless. 

I’ve felt happiness lately going to kpop shows. When the artist looks at me. Not a sexy look or even a real look, but I still feel seen. Your eyeballs, You this Artist I care about, has seen my face. Has felt my presence in the crowd. And I like to delusionaly think that matters. I know in a woo woo way, everyones energy matters, but I’m in my head really BELIEVING that my presence is special. So when I go out, or try to meet new people, and just get met with duds or nothing at all - I feel like it was a waste. Or, worse, that I’m the joke. And that I’m crazy for thinking I’m special at all. 

So. I need to clean my car. I need to get in shape. I need to dust off my cameras. I need to USE them. I need to play piano. I need to shred my magazines and make collage art again. I need to go out into nature and get attuned to the sunset and stars again. I need to even like, update my goddamn facebook page, and instagram and delete emails and FIX MY FUCKING LINKEDIN PROFILE BUT I’M SCARED. and lazy. And I want to have somebody to impress, but NOBODY. CARES. So why bother? But I genuinely feel like I’m disappearing! talking in circles. 

By not doing things for myself out of fear, I’m essentially proving the world right. By not existing, I dont exist. 

Why am I so scared? I mean, theres the Mom card. I’ve been aching to call her more than usual lately. This year I’ve felt the physical, tangible craving to call her. She died in 20...15? 2015. August of 2015. 

And I never knew what being loved like that felt like until it was gone. She knew me, she saw everything. And she thought I was the most special, just for existing. She had 5+ miscarriages after having my older brother. She didnt think she was gonna have another baby. Let alone a little girl. Then she got the call, that the pregnancy stuck, that I was gonna be her daughter. The doctors literally SEWED HER CERVIX SHUT to keep me up there long enough. I was still born a month early, but I was her treasure. She wanted me SO BADLY. 

I still dont know if her death was an accident or intentional, and I’m afraid to ask. I dont even know if my father would tell me the truth, he may need to believe it was an accident. But she was deeply depressed and addicted to hydrocodone, and she was found dead on our living room floor, all alone, on the day of her’s and my father’s 35th wedding anniversary. He was in the hospital at the time, he’d broken his shin bone weeks prior and has bad bones so he was in a rehab place. She was home alone, encouraged by him to just stay in and enjoy the house, and that they’d celebrate their anniversary another weekend. He sent her a bouquet of roses that she’d never see. They sat on our doorstep while she laid inside on the floor. It was devestating. Well, duh, thats an understatement. 

When I was going to therapy (I stopped over COVID and havent gone back) my therapist asked me “would it make anything different for you, if you knew?” and at first I answered No. But even the next day I was honest with myself and truly, it would make a huge fucking difference. Knowing if it was a mistake, too much wine, took an extra hydrocodone, got woozy and passed out, maybe hit her head, or maybe a heart thing. That would change everything, if she didnt WANT to leave us. If it was just a fluke. That’d make a very big difference. 

I’ve gotten over a lot since then and the layers of growth and wisdom I’ve developed is indescribable. I’m deeply proud of myself and who I am inside. But thats what makes me angry and sad right now. Why have I become such a blob? Surely I miss her love, even though it was so broken the last five years of her life with her severe depression. I forgive that, and I think she’d forgive me for being too young to understand and fight harder for her. Our hometown doesnt have shit in the way of Mental Health services. She needed worlds more help, and I couldve fought harder for her. Alas, I think she would be upset with me for thinking this way. She’d express “we’re the parents, its not on you to parent your own parents.” 

Anyways. I feel like my Father is loving me how he knows how. He’s great for sweet support, but not great with life advice. He’s the least ambitious man I know since he retired. He HATED work, but suffered and sacrificed infinitely for us anyway to keep our lives afloat, and for that I’ll be forever grateful. But since he got to leave work and came into family money, he doesnt do much unless he HAS to. He’s a music man, but hasnt played guitar or written songs or done anything creative in decades. He let it burn out. I respect him, I love him for him and try not to be disappointed about his choices but... its just difficult to express my feelings to him about these things. He’s like “Josie, dont worry I have money, you’ll never be in trouble.” And I just... I believe him but I dont believe him? I dont want to buckle into that. I feel like I need to earn that privelege. I cant just ask, I’m not a trust fund kid. Cant just be like DADDY I WANT TO GO TO MIAMI CAN I HAVE TEN GRAND? Like, no! First of all He’d never say yes to that hahaha. I’ve definitely lied (*white lied) to my family to sound more put together and “worthy” than I actually probably am. I talk about my job like its a bigger deal than it is, when in reality I’m only making $15 an hour and I’m late every single day. 

Fuck, speaking of. I was supposed to take a shower about 6 hours ago, but its 11:30pm and I have to go to bed and still havent gotten clean. Its been too many days. I’m gross. 

See!? my life needs a fucking overhaul. WHY AM I STRUGGLING TO TAKE A FUCKING SHOWER. 

I am broken dude. wtf. 

I feel more motivated to take care of myself WHEN I FEEL LIKE SOMEBODY GIVES A SHIT WHO I AM! Somebody to wash my hair for, dress up for. Even though truth is, I absolutely do it for me. I go out to a concert to be seen, sure, but when I’m getting ready, I LOVE my reflection. I love hanging out with music on and expressing artistry with makeup or clothing styling. I do it because IIIIII like it. And then out in the world, at least if no one else likes it, at least I do?

But it still requires an invitation out. Someone saying “hey come meet us at this bar!” or a great concert I want to see and SHOW UP for. TURN UP for. 

How do I do these things, how do I give a shit about showing up, if theres no invitation? if theres no obvious purpose other than just doing the thing?

I fear by existing out there, youre inviting critique. If i carry a camera around, people will ask to see. And what if I suck!!! What if theyre like “oh my god who the fuck does she think she is, carrying that nice ass big ass camera and her photos are so mediocre.” 

I dont want to be a joke. 

Sometimes I go into massive panic attacks getting dressed to go out because I feel like, too old and fat or the wrong genre to pull anything off and if I go out like... it’ll be the “who does she think she is.” 

fuck. 

fuck fuck fuck. I need to wash my face. I need to brush my teeth. 

I need to get a FUCKING LIFE. 

I want that Hybe America job. Content Preditor, they mushed together the words pre- and editor to make PREDITOR. How sexy could that be! 

The job description describes who I wish I was. Prepared, experienced, creative, multitasking, able to improvise, team leader, good with new people, passionate about the music industry. 

I havent taken any vitamins today. the EASIEST thing to do. because I hate walking into the kitchen to get water. 

Thats a WHOLE OTHER CAN OF WORMS. my living situation. this post is already too long. I’ve already procrastinated showering for far too long. I’ve already watched... lets see... NINE episodes, 40 minutes each. 

I need help. Talk more tomorrow. Or, yknow, six more years or however long the previous gap between my posts have been. 

[kifu]

Heya thank you so much for the art advice earlier! I was wondering if you had any specific suggestions for programs and/or brushes (you know specifically for someone whose only fine art experience has been in pencil and charcoal 😭) .

I’m currently using iArtbook because it’s free. I know Procreate is probably the most popular program but I’m literally -$300+ in my bank account right now, so that isn’t a current option 😅.

However I do believe you can upload brushes to the iArtBook app, honestly I’m not sure, I haven’t tried but you can edit the brushes in a very similar fashion to Adobe Photoshop. So I’m assuming you can also download and upload brushes. I actually really like this program because it has a similar feel to Adobe programs and as a Photographer I’m very experienced with Adobe (I have an Adobe Cloud Account).

In all honesty I’ve never been a good illustrator (since my main focus in my fine arts education was always photography) , but I find the activity meditative and I’m ALWAYS looking to improve.

(Also I was gonna DM you but cant so sorry for the long question 😅)

Yo, it's all good. No apology necessary.

I can only suggest what I know. I've never used Procreate, and I've never even heard of iArtbook. I'm also one of those that absolutely will torrent my art program of choice. And have.

A long, long time ago (like probably thirteen years), I got a copy of Corel (Coral? Idek anymore) free with the purchase of my Wacom bamboo tablet. I didn't know what I was doing yet and I hated it. My laptop hated it. It was very heavy and lagged big time.

I switch to Gimp, which is legally free and open source. I used Gimp for years with zero problems. You can import a lot of Photoshop brushes into Gimp without issue. Compared to Photoshop and Paint Studio, it's incredibly underpowered. Looking back at the art I made, however, I was not poorly off.

From Gimp, wanting more, I then switched to Photoshop CS5. It was incredibly easy to find and install. Personally, I say screw Adobe, since their current model is subscription based. I hate that. I used PS for yearsssssss, up until last year, I believe. It wasn't too heavy for my laptop to handle unless I used too big of a brush. It allowed me to expand my knowledge of digital art programs. It has way more to offer than I'll ever use. But as i mentioned before, the natural art brushes are ... okay, and the blending tool is awful. I learned to NOT ever use the blending tool because of PS.

Throughout time in my PS years, I switched from a Wacom Bamboo tablet to a Huion pen tablet (three different ones) to a Huion Kamvas 16 Pro tablet. With my family's help, I put money towards improving my art by way of hardware, and each tablet became significantly better. A good tablet will help TREMENDOUSLY, but by no means does anyone *need* to splurge on a screen tablet like the Kamvas series. I recommend Huion. It's hard to go wrong with them. In case that ever tickles your fancy.

Like, I'm pulling examples of art I've done with these programs and tablets, specifically unshaded pieces, to show that the software and hardware doesn't necessarily make the piece.

Now, I'm using Clip Studio Paint because it comes with so many native traditional brushes. Again, the company switched or threatened to switch to a subscription pay, so I have no qualms in resorting to circumventing their purchase page.

I will say, I think I love Clip Studio more than I ever did Photoshop. The brushes are just ... perfect.

Like this. This isn't pencil and paper! It's the pencil brush that comes with Clip Studio. It draws JUST like a pencil and I feel like I'm in my natural element when I get to use it.

If you do decide to use PS, or a program that is PS brush compatible, I'll have to find that set of brushes that works similarly to these.

These pictures both used one of the pencil brushes from that set in PS. The horse was painted with a watercolor wash brush; the human with a chalk brush. It's nowhere near as versatile as what can be used in Clip, though.

But I'm sure you could find many brushes through dA and gumroad to use until you find the one that works for you, too!

[transboykirito]

I have my oc brain rot rn so I apologize if this doesn’t help much but i’ll include some sao related stuff for them

nikki n tomo the ocs i was talking abt earlier, they have matching earrings!! They each have one Orange (like the fruit) charm earring that they wear on matching sides bc i got the idea from a webtoon ive been reading (cheriecrush)

they also!!!! Have promise rings, but they wear it on a string tied around their neck like a necklace, and nikki fidgets with it alot when she’s nervous

this is kinda cringe but its an old idea we never changed, but tomo calls nikki stupid names like “strawberry” because she gets really flustered and when she does her face turns red uhm uhm

OK HERES SOME SAO RELATED one of the v first things i drew for them was nikki sleepinf on tomos chest, and what happened was earlier they like. yk sao teauma oh no pvpers O H N O O I COULDNT SAVE MY TEAM and (yes, this was infact copied from kirito and asuna, we were like 14/15 when we vvv first started them) but i think iirc nikki asked tomo to stay the night because his presence comforted her and she really didnt wanna be on her own, especially because of how much guilt she felt because she couldnt do the final blows on the pvpers to save her friends and tomo had too (she never ever made that mistake again)

Uhh

they went back to her apartment and i don’t remember but to lighten the mood and shit before she went to bed tomo put fucking frog legs and unknown mysterious meat in her bed 💀 it was a prank kirito would pull and based off that one scene in s1

Anyway they slept in the same bed, tomo couldnt fall asleep and nikki ended up hugging him while she slept n it was a cute thing i need to redraw it

i missed so many details, this was so long ago 😭😭

nikki was the party leader for her team, it was Nikki, Maemi, Tomo, and 2 other people i never named or drew, not in the sao universe anyway, nikki and tomo are the only survivors from that team but thankfully, Kiyoko her irl friend survived the game :D

nikki would nag tomo and the others all the time to make sure they had their healing items and antidotes and such, because tomo was a very forgetful person and def would be dead if he didnt have nikki around 💀 not because he cant handle himself but because he’s fucking stupid

i cannot remember if i said rhis but tomo is a very memey golden retriever type boy and if you mixed Kirito and Klein together i think LMAO

I have an oc named selka who i completely ripped off of selka from alicization bc i was too lazu to make up a new name and design HOWEVER!!!!!!!!! SHE BECAME HER OWN CHARACTER AND I DID GIVE HER HER OWN DESIGN n shes a sweetie i love hee to bits shes rllt into photography, and very academically smart, she takes care of everyone before herself all though she is very snarky sometimes, she like wearing this lacey blouse with slightly puffy sleeves

I have a lesbian oc who looks like fluttershy. I didnt mean for her to look like fluttershy and ngl i’m kinda :( abr ir but its ok shes pretty and her name is Eliana and shes a doctor and i love her

i love all of them <3 i love hearing about peoples ocs please ramble to me whenever i genuinely love hearing about them!!!!!

[fehfwert]

May I offer you some Goose.

[tatakaebomb]

Spoilt rotten

ꕥ Pairing : Boyf’s bestf suna x reader

ꕥ Synopsis : Stop getting so impatient when your boyfriends bestfriend is around! Greedy girls never have the best of luck.

ꕥ Word count : 2.4K

ꕥ A/N : dw, there’s also still some atsumu action here too

ꕥ TW : fingering, cheating, vouyerism, panty stealing, unconsented photography, non con (?), dub con, dacryphilia, enemies smut, ass spanking, ass play, finger sucking, dom! Suna, dom! sub!, sub! reader, hate sex, pet names, perversion, intrusion, mentions of oral, orgasm denial, cream pie, squirting, size kink, creaming, sex, SMUT LOL, suna is an ass hole, probs more just hate sex suna, 18+

"Why is he here tsumu."

"Calm down, we gotta do our chemistry work together."

"Your girlfriends a bitch."

"Suna what the fuck-"

And thats where chaos started, shouting, arguing, finger pointing, its without a doubt that the man standing infront of you was one of your least favourable people on the planet, however it doesn't help that he was your boyfriends bestfriend.

"Tsumu tell him to leave!" You whine, foot planted on the ground as your eyes angrily peer at the smug face wiped over Suna Rintaro's face. He was nothing but a nightmare, always ruining the minimal time you and Atsumu have together, and it doesn't help that hes never sorry for it. Sometimes you think Atsumu enjoys hanging out with Suna more than he does his girlfriend - and the way he seems to act never disproves it.

"Well y/n...its raining out, I told him he could stay the night..." Atsumu meekly speaks, voice small in fear of your reaction.

Its times like this where you consider breaking up with your boyfriend, he can be so dense sometimes its painful. Can he not see you dont like him? Whys he letting him interrupt your quality time together?

"Suna. Can I speak to you...alone..." Following your command, atsumu leaves the room, almost glad Suna is the one getting into shit and not him.

It was a dull silence, your furious stare peering straight at the dark haired man slouched infront of you. Hands slumped in his pockets and blank, bored expression planted on him. "Why cant you just leave him alone?"

"What do you mean leave him alone? I dont swing like th-"

"Not in that way! Your always coming here, taking 'tsumu away, whether it be volleyball or work. Im so done with you!" Voice heightened and finger wagged in his face, you were angry to say the least. But he didn't seem to care, as always he was too bothered in his phone to actually give a shit about your words. It was hopeless, you almost came to the conclusion of actually breaking up with atsumu.

'I give up-' you sigh, arms flailing as you move to sit on the couch. Hands cupping your face in frustration and agony. It was only when suna could see you were visibly upset he seemed to care...or so you thought. 'This is pointless.'

'Do you mind not sitting on my jacket? I don't want your tears on it.'

'Wh- as if I'd ever shed a tear on you rintaro.'

The glint in his eyes went unmissed by you, but truth be told suna loved seeing you like this. Fiesty, talking back. He loved your sharp mouth witty tongue, but was always so confused on why you settled for atsumu, he was nothing but goofy - and annoying -.

He never revealed the truth, the real reason why he loved staying around you so much, as if he would - to be caught preying on his bestfriends girlfriend? To be caught stealing her dirty panties from his laundry basket and rubbing his cock with it, imagining it's her on her knees for him and NOT for atsumu. He deserves you, he craves you, needs you even...but hell if he would let you know this. Without a fight anyways...

'Get up.' He ordered, hand grabbing onto your wrist as he dragged you off the couch, your legs instinctively wobbling upwards and hands fallen flat on his chest.

'Fuck! Ouch- atleast handle me with care.'

'What, are you a box or something' he chuckles, your eyes rolling at his pathetic attempt at a joke 'I wonder how atsumu got lucky with a girl like you y/n, you sure do put people in their place...'

'What? The fuck are you on about?'

'Don't blush too hard, just saying...' lips move to mutter closer against your ear, his thumb rubbing circles into your weak wrist as your chests were so close, so close to touching. 'You still got a nasty ass tongue on you'

'You fucking dick-'

'Speak like that a fucking gain ill have to put you in your place-'

'Or what...'

'Such a fucking slut I swear I'll-'

The tension in the room was instantly cut by atsumu calling out your names, your hands ripped apart from his touch as you both walked forth into the bedroom, only to see him laid on the bed flicking through the television.

'Movie?'

-

Muffled noises of a random horror film was played in the background, you, however, were too focused on how you managed to get planted between suna and atsumu, the glare of sunas phone too distracting to watch a film, but you didn't wanna upset atsumu, after all he already seems stressed enough from your prior argument, you wouldn't wanna upset him more would you?

The clock next to you showed 1am. The room was dark, lights turned off and the streets outside were silent, it felt like the film had been playing forever, the stupid animation of some creepy dolls killing humans, what a waste of time.

'Tsumu...' you whisper, lips moving to tap at his neck, fingers clawing lower between his thighs, your teeth clasping the skin of his neck, denting dark purple circles into him. 'Need you so bad...'

If suna isn't gonna leave, your not gonna give up your sex life for him.

'Not now y/n...' he mutters, pulling you into his lap and mumbling against your lips, erection digging right into your slit.

A disappointed whine escaped your mouth as you turned around to face the TV, atsumu's arms hugging you closer to his body. The flick of your eye showed you suna wasn't half interested, his phone tossed to a side as he watched the film, hands cupped behind his head and eyes almost asleep.

It wasn't until you felt atsumu's fingers crawl between your legs that you tensed up again, his head leaning forth on your shoulder to kiss your cheek, lips curling towards your ears as he spoke as quietly as he could 'gotta be quiet then...'

His digits wasted no time massaging your clit through your panties, slow agonising circles that had your breathing drop and legs close together, your fingers clawing onto his arm as you tried your best to focus on the film, Suna next to you still not noticing.

You almost rode him from how good he felt, tip nudging at your g spot as he finally pushed his fingers inside you, rubbing you how you like. His grip on your waist tightening, pulling you closer to him.

'Yes...yes like that...' a silent whine left your lips as you kept trying to reach your climax, the pace of his fingers increasing, thumb rubbing circles right into your soft spot, your body almost numb from him, it's been so long you swear you felt like you could fuck him for hours.

'This films shit. Imma sleep.' Suna interrupted, Atsumus action halting to a stop. You felt like crying, you were so so close, Suna probably knew that too.

'Ah..okay. Well maybe we should sleep then' He speaks, placing you on the bed next to Suna and getting up to turn the television off. You angrily throw the covers over your head and drift off to sleep, upset and disappointed.

-

The clock showed 3am. You wouldn’t stop tossing and turning, no matter what you couldn’t fall asleep. Atsumu’s back faced towards you as Suna was laying upright, soft snores escaping your boyfriends mouth.

‘Quit moving-‘ suna whispered, eyes flickering open to look at you as you slumped your head against your pillow, peering at his messy form. Hair draped over his sleepy, cat like eyes and long hands gently nudging your exposed thigh.

‘Fuck off.’

‘Cant sleep?’

‘What do you think.’

‘Just fucking sleep-‘ was his last words before pulling the duvet over his head and attempting to fall back asleep.

The clock was ticking but you were wide awake, silently you dragged yourself out of bed, waddling downstairs into the kitchen for some water.

Goosebumps trembled up your legs at the feeling of being so exposed, shorts showing the lower curve of your ass and your white tank top hardly protecting anything, glasses nudged up on your nose so you could see what you were doing.

Filling up a glass of water, you drank it all, the droplets of water dripping down your top and collecting at your boobs, but you couldn’t care, you felt like an insomniac.

‘Since you woke me up, the least you could do is get me a glass’

The voice behind you startled you, Suna stood at the doorway, sweatpants hung at his hips as he stretches his back, legs nearing towards you as he leans over you to snatch a glass from the cupboard.

‘Didn’t you sleep?’

‘No, you wouldn’t stop fucking moving’

‘Well there’s just not enough room in the bed for the three of us’

‘True, you should’ve went home’ he nonchalantly speaks, taking a sip from his glass of water and setting it on the desk. Standing infront of your smaller figure, the reflection of the moonlight really bringing out your eyes.

‘I’ve had it up to here with you suna! Just fuck off god the only reason I fucking speak to you is cause your always around fucking MY BOYF-‘

‘You speak too much.’ He says, pushing his fingers deep down your throat, so far you were gagging, finger nails gripping at his wrist to let you go. He wouldn’t though, instead he pushed you closer to the worktop, spinning you round and slamming you face first with the cold marble.

‘G-get off of me’

‘Fuck no- you think you deserve it? Interrupting my sleep? Shouting at me? Swearing at me?’

‘Of course you deserve it you pr- AH’ Your retaliation earnt you a harsh slap to your ass, back arched even closer down, tits spewing out of your top, cold nipples erect from the glass.

The skin of your ass was flushed red, his fingers moving to grip at your skin, tweezing it, long fingers dragged lower and lower towards your entrance, examining how you try your hardest to close your thighs, but the grip between your legs prevents that.

‘Your such a brat, don’t think I didn’t notice miya fingering you earlier, you that desperate?’ He tugs your hair, your back arched and eyes tilted to meet his.

‘A-ah I don’t know what your talking about.’

‘Don’t fucking lie. Did you even cum?’

‘…’

‘Such a brat hm? Fine. Gonna be like that, I’ll make sure your crying to cum at the end of the night’ dragging your lips into his, he spits down your throat, drool lathering at the edges of your mouth as his tongue swirls down your throat. Large cock prodding from behind you, his free hand moving to palm at himself, gathering the slick from your cunt as his pre-cum earning a whine from you.

‘Ah- suna…’

‘Want me to fuck this pretty pussy hm? Fuck it better than your precious boyfriend ever could? You want that?’ He mocks

‘Y-yes yes ah- please…’

It didn’t take much protesting until he pushes inside of you, your lip bitten down harshly in an attempt to not scream, he was so big. Long vein struck all through his cock, nudging at your tight walls. Small thrusts of his hips had you almost going feral, the lewd noises filling up the hollow walls of the kitchen.

Your ass shook against his thighs, slamming and haltering by his hips, sharp slaps sent to your core as he kept playing with you. His cock felt so good, prodding you so well, he was almost made for you.

‘Feels so good baby…’

‘Gotta keep it down princess, don’t want miya hearing do ya? Or do ya…?’

‘NO- no no ill- fuck yeah- keep quiet…’

‘Good girl…’ he kept going, your tits violently shaking under you, thighs trembling and slick pooling at your stomach, the knot was tightening and you were so close to cumming. Red marks on your ass defining his hand print, your sore lips being dragged into another sloppy kiss as you came closer and closer to your end.

‘Gn’ cum’

‘Yeah?’

‘Yeah yeah…fuck…’

It was then he pulled out, a sharp gasp sent from your mouth as you eagerly try your best to thrust back onto his cock, his large hand moving to push on your ass, preventing you from moving.

‘Ya gotta earn it doll? Whose the better fucker, me? Or your boyfriend ?’

‘Y-you’ you meekly whisper, body to weak to respond

‘What’s that?’

‘You, you baby please- need you so bad please..’

‘And what do you need me to do princess?’

‘Make me cum, wanna cum so much on your cock please, wanna milk you so bad please daddy please…’ you were so close to crying, tears brimming the water line of your eyes. You felt so deprived, you needed him to fuck you again.

‘Fine baby… go for it.’

He slammed deep inside you, your eyes falling to the back of your head as you cried a moan, hips jolting at an inhumane pace inside your tight pussy, you were milking him out, clenching around him so well he almost forgot what he was doing, your cum spurting over his cock, your body weakly moaning as you wailed a loud cry. He finished soon after, warm spurts of white leaked inside of you.

‘F-fuck..’ he lowly groaned, pulling himself out of you and admiring what a mess he’s made inside of your pretty pussy.

Turning your head around you were faced with the flash of his camera, capturing your exposed, fucked out face. And zooming into the mess he’s made in your pussy, his fingers plunging inside to make sure you don’t drop any.

‘What are you doing?!’

‘Sending this to atsumu, ya don’t think he deserves a girlfriend who would cheat on him, do ya princess?’

[townslore]

you know i've seen many different takes on what goro can do after.. all that, as a job. continuing to study law, or psychology, or philosophy, and even picking up stuff like photography. those are all valid options and i really like some of them!!!!

but no one can tear my silly little headcanon of him working in daycare away from me

i have a lot of reasons behind it: while i dont think he'd want to raise own children, i still think that seeing them makes him happy, since their outlook on the world isnt tainted—and he can do whatever he can to make sure it stays that way, when hes working at a kindergarten with several groups of children. they remind him of himself from way back when. and, well. i wanna work in daycare, so i can add some of my reasoning too. i just think it'd make him happy. yes, working with kids can be tiring at times, they can be little shits, im not denying that. but at the end of the day, they're just kids, and i will never understand anyone whos purposefully mean to them. i dont think he'd be mean or annoyed with kids. he'd first be awkward for sure. and cant really deny them anything cause saying no to them is really hard cause like! you dont wanna make them cry!!! but i dont think he'd be bad with them.

i've actually seen a few instances of this in fanfics i've read and it! makes me rlly happy! like, him talking to a kid that got lost in a big store and searching for their mom. stuff like that. i wish it was explored more, tho i think a lot of people probably dont share this view on him and suspect hes either bad at handling them or just.. mean to them.

that is. about it. excuse me for wanting to talk about this i just!!!! i only talked about this like ONCE and it was on one instagram story so i. needed to get that out of my system lol.

[f1nalboys]

K, P & V for Randy for the NSFW thing!

RANDY <3 heheh thank you for this >:)

nsfw headcanon prompt

K - Kissing (what parts of their body do they like having kissed? what parts of their partner do they enjoy kissing? do they like leaving marks / having marks left on them?) 

randy my beloved is SUCH a sucker for hand kisses. like if you and he are holding hands and then you kiss his knuckles hes MELTING!!!!! also i hc randy as chubby bc i can and im right so kissing his love handles >>>> im shaking.... he loves kissing his partners neck chest and stoamch, leaving bite marks and hickies behind hehe. big fan of marking and LOVES when you mark him, especially somewhere that he cant hide it >:)

P - Photography (are cameras allowed in the bedroom? do they send nudes? do they ask for nudes? would they ever record themselves having sex / being caught up in a sexual act?) 

hmmmm okay so idk if he would ever take photos of himself and then send to you unprompted but if you were ever like hey ;) let me see you he'd be running to the bathroom. LOVES IT when you send photos of yourself at inopportune times (say hes at work in a meeting and he opens his phone up to see a photo of you completely naked. he'd be excusing himself to the bathroom to jerk off lol) hes also okay with the idea of recording the two of you together but only if its mostly focused on you.

NOW if we're talking ghostface randy???? cameras everywhere even if you dont know about it (ESPECIALLY if you dont know about it hehe) he's constantly sending photos of himself to you adn expects just as many if not more of yourself. makes home made sex tapes all the time especially if you two are roleplaying <3

V - Voyeurism (do they like to watch, or are they more hands on? are they more of an exhibitionist?) 

cuck randy. enough said <3

[atlabeth]

10 things i hate about you part 4 - jj maybank x fem!reader

PART 3 | MASTERLIST | PART 5

a/n: damn i really cant put things out on a decent schedule huh? im so sorry this is coming out 3 weeks later lol hope it doesnt suck

warning(s): some very vague photography talk bc i didnt feel like doing hella research, y/n is an asshole, topper is an asshole, y/n hates jj some more but also doesnt, everyone has a fuuuun time

wc: 3.5k

“So, how is it going with the shrew?” Pope took a couple water bottles and a beer can out of the fridge, tossing the extra waters to John B and Kie and the can to JJ. “Is it everything you’ve ever dreamed of?”

JJ frowned as he caught the can and cracked it open. “The hell’s a shrew?”

Pope stopped in the middle of the room and stared at him. “Y’know, ‘The Taming of the Shrew’?” He was met with a blank look. “It’s Shakespeare, she’s like the shrew— you know what, nevermind. What’s it like trying to get with Sarah Cameron’s sister?”

“I would also like to know,” John B spoke up as he propped his feet up against the table. “I have another tutor session with Sarah tomorrow before school, and I gotta know how my chances are looking.”

Kiara snorted. “Ten dollars that she still hates him and nothing is ever going to happen.”

“Ever the pessimist, Kie,” JJ sighed with a shake of his head. “I’ll have you know that things are actually going pretty well! I hung out with her last Friday and watched as she keyed Topper’s car, then I got her number. I don’t know why everyone’s so scared of her — she’s not that bad.”

“That’s why people are scared of her,” Pope said. “Because she keyed the car of one of the richest guys on this island with no fear of repercussions.”

“She’s one of the richest girls on the island,” John B defended. “If she’s taking down kooks, that means we don’t have to.” He then looked back to JJ, eyes almost sparkling with hope. “So? Did you get a date with her?”

JJ pursed his lips. “That would still be a no.”

John B groaned as Pope and Kiara exchanged unsurprised looks. “Does anyone wanna give me my ten dollars?” she asked with a self-satisfied smile.

“Shut up, Kie.” John B sat up, now fully concentrated on the matter at hand. “What did you do with her? Did you even ask her out?”

“Of course I asked her out, man! I’ve asked out like, three times now.” JJ rolled his eyes and took a swig from his can. “She’s said no every time. I guess she’s not into surfing.”

“Surfing?” Pope couldn’t help his own bewildered laugh. “Man, do you even know her?”

“Oh, I wasn’t aware that you knew her,” JJ retorted. “Please, Almighty Heyward, do tell.”

He rolled his eyes. “I don’t know her know her, but she’s in the running for valedictorian — smart people at this school are at least aware of each other. So trust me when I say she’s not a surfer bro like you. If you want her to tolerate you, then your best bet is getting into photography.”

“Photography?” JJ ran a hand through his hair and let himself fall back into the sofa. “I mean, she was taking pictures on the track the first time I talked to her. But are you sure that there isn’t anything else she’s really into? I don’t know shit about pictures.”

John B sighed. “I can always ask Sarah what she knows about her. I’m pretty sure she’ll help us with whatever if it means she gets a free pass to date.”

Kiara grinned at JJ. “Better start saving up for a camera, J.”

~~~~~~~~

johnny boy: i am very sorry to report that photography’s your best bet

johnny boy: sarah told me that it’s her number one thing, unless you’re looking to get into feminist literature

johnny boy: also you need to stop smoking. she hates it

goddamn

idk how im gonna handle this whole shitshow without weed lmao

you’re lucky that i like you so much and that topper is paying me a lot because this is really pushing it

johnny boy: i know and i will never stop thanking you

looks like i’m off to bullshit my way into her photo class!

And bullshit he did.

His guidance counselor was so desperate for him to get any kind of boost to his GPA that when he brought up the idea of adding a class to his already lacking schedule, he swore that she could’ve cried.

And that was how JJ found himself searching up how to take pictures and how to sound smart about photography on his phone ten minutes before the class began, leaning up against his locker with a determination not often seen in relation to school.

It was also how he found himself in another unwanted confrontation with Topper Thornton. JJ was unable to hold back an eye roll when he saw the kook walking towards him, and he was 99% sure he knew what this conversation was going to be about.

“Hey, asshole. You got anything to say about what happened last Friday, or do you just wanna start with paying me back for what happened to my car?”

Knew it. JJ glared at him. “Look, it wasn’t my fault. You’ve told me how horrible she is, so shouldn’t you have been expecting something like this? I mean, you’re the one that provoked her.”

Topper’s lip curled upwards. “You really got a thing for pushing your limits, huh, pogue? I’m paying you to take this girl out, not fuck up everything in the process.”

“Do you want to get with Sarah or not?” Topper kept his sharp gaze on JJ, but he didn’t back down. “You said it yourself — I’m the only one that can deal with her. So back the fuck off, and let me do my thing.”

“You’re this close, okay?” Topper held his pointer finger and his thumb so close together they were almost touching. “You’re this close to making me throw this whole thing out the window just so I can fuck you over.”

“Ooh.” JJ grimaced and shook his head. “Sarah doesn’t like violent guys, Top. I doubt she’d like you any more if you start beating up on poor, innocent pogues.”

Dealing with Topper Thornton was almost made worth it by seeing how angry JJ could make him, and this time he got his reward in the form of a clenched jaw and a glare surrounded in daggers. “I wanna see results soon, Maybank. My patience is really wearing thin with you.”

“Trust me. I want to be done with this as soon as possible too — dealing with you is exhausting.”

Topper huffed and walked off, causing JJ to chuckle at the abrupt end to their lovely conversation. It was too easy.

~~~~~~~~

The first thing you spotted when you walked into your classroom was the shock of blonde hair growing ever the more familiar. But along with the blue eyes came the usual downwards twist of your lips, and you purposely walked past him as you shrugged off your bag.

“Damn, Cameron,” JJ called as you went past. “You’re really gonna ignore me after all we went through together?”

“We didn’t go through anything together,” you responded curtly. You then took a seat and turned to him. “Now, what the hell are you doing here? I don’t know much about you, but I do know that JJ Maybank is not a photographer.”

He shrugged and leaned back in his chair. “Needed an extra class, wanted some extra appreciation for the arts. Not everything’s about you, Cameron.”

You rolled your eyes and turned your attention to the front as your teacher walked in, already beginning her daily tirade.

“Welcome back, everybody. I trust that you all had a good weekend?” Ms. Newman pushed the door shut and made her way through the room before taking a seat on the edge of her own desk. “Anyone wanna share?”

Nobody in the class raised their hand, and she sighed. “Okay, that’s about what I expected. I guess we’ll start with introducing our new students — JJ Maybank and Alicia Hawthorne.” She gestured to where JJ sat and then towards a dark-haired girl in the back. “They’re both new to this class, but I know that you’re both going to have a great time here.”

“A hundred percent,” JJ said, causing you to scoff when he gave a thumbs up that was just a little too eager. He responded by turning towards you and holding his pointer finger over his mouth in a ‘sh’ motion, and you just shook your head and crossed your arms. This kid was truly unbearable.

Ms. Newman chuckled and clapped her hands together as she moved over to her laptop, addressing the class once more after opening it. “Glad to hear that, JJ, because we’re starting off today strong. Those of you that have been in my class before know that I like doing three big projects, one at the beginning, middle, and end of the year — it’s the best way to see your progression as artists, and two of them technically count as your midterm and your final. Two birds with one stone.”

You sighed and leaned your head against your hand, already used to this lecture. You’ve had the good luck of being with Ms. Newman since your freshman year — by now, you could probably recite her project speech by heart.

“Our first project for this year is something a bit different from past years in that it’s going to take a bit longer than usual.” She taps the touchpad a couple of times and her screen is showing on the projector, showing a Google Doc with a whole list of instructions that you can’t force yourself to read. You might like photography, but the only reason you’re in this class is because it’s a requirement for yearbook. It’s stupidly easy, and you know that you’ll be able to handle whatever this project involves with your eyes closed and get an A doing it.

“A good portion of you are seniors, and I know that most of you probably want to get out of here as soon as you can. But high school is something that you’re going to miss once you leave, and you don’t want to move so fast that you don’t focus on any of it. The idea of this project is to make you slow down, to appreciate every day that passes while you’re still in the high school bubble.”

You rolled your eyes. The sooner you were off this island and 2000 miles away, the better.

“So your assignment for this first project is simple, but I hope it makes you think a little bit. Every day, starting today and ending on the first day of next month, you’ll take a picture. It can be of whatever you want, any part of your life, there just has to be a picture for every day of the month. At the end, you’ll put all your pictures together and present it, connecting it with an overarching story. It can be about what those pictures mean to you, what you were going through during that month — you can do anything you want, as long as it connects to you.”

You barely tip your head up as you look around the room, trying to gauge the reactions of the class. Most of them look annoyed, some of them look like they’re about to fall asleep, and JJ is looking at you. You give him your best glare then turn your attention back to the board.

“I recognize that a lot of you are busy with other classes, so I’m going to give the rest of the class to think up ideas and maybe get started with your planning. I’ll leave this up for reference, and feel free to ask any questions if you have them.” She smiles at the class, an expression that is not shared, and nods. “I’m looking forward to seeing what you all come up with!”

You were in the middle of taking out a notebook and a pencil to get started on some ideas when you hear Ms. Newman say your name, and your head perks up. “Could you come over here for just a moment? Oh, and you too, JJ.”

“...Sure.” You didn’t really have a choice, but any situation with you and JJ was enough to make you wary. You set your pencil on the table then walked over to her desk, JJ joining you a second later.

“As I’m sure you know, JJ is new to this class. We don’t exactly have enough funding at this school for the arts to have more than one level, so that means beginners and more advanced students have to work together in the same class.” Ms. Newman clasped her hands together and offered the two of you a slight smile. “I don’t mean any offense, but she is a lot more experienced than you, JJ. And because this project is a long-term one, I thought that it would be nice for the two of you to work together. You can sort of teach JJ the ropes of using a camera, make sure that he’s actually doing the right thing.”

It was a physical effort to keep your jaw off the ground, but you weren’t able to stop your eyes from widening. In your peripherals, you could see JJ grinning. “I think that’s a great idea, teach.”

“I, um— I don’t?” You placed your hands on the table and chuckled mirthlessly. “Full offense, but I have so many better things that I could do than teach him how to do something in a class he signed up for.”

“Watch your mouth,” Ms. Newman said with a pointed look at you. “You’re one of my most talented students, and that kind of talent could be used to help others find their passion instead of stewing in your own bitterness. JJ is someone that wants to learn, and you’re someone that can help him.”

You continued with your deadpan expression and she sighed once again. “If you do this for me, then I will give you a glowing recommendation for college.”

“I’ve already been accepted to UCLA,” you responded dryly.

“I’ll give you extra credit on this project.”

“I don’t need it.”

And for the first time in you think your entire high school career, Ms. Newman actually looks annoyed. “...I’ll lend you the good camera for the whole year.”

Your eyebrows shoot up. “The Canon R5?”

Ms. Newman nodded, allowing a small smile at what she saw as a success.

With a huff of your own, you finally conceded. “Fine. I’ll do it. But bribery won’t work on me for anything else, okay?”

JJ held out his hand with another grin. “Looking forward to working with you, partner.”

With a roll of your eyes and an indignant scoff, you walked back to your seat. JJ shrugged and looked at Ms. Newman. “For the record, I think this is going to go great.”

~~~~~~~~

“Hey— can you slow down?”

You don’t even cast a glance behind you at the sound of JJ’s voice, and after a second he’s keeping pace with you through the hallways. The lingering threat of a partnership with JJ Maybank had been hanging over your head since you sat back down after the conversation, and you’re pretty sure the only reason JJ didn’t try to talk to you afterwards was because he didn’t want to cause a scene.

But now the day was over, and you weren’t as fortunate.

“What do you want?” you asked, making no effort to shield your annoyance.

“I think it’s pretty obvious what I want,” he responded. “We’re partners for this project, whether you like it or not. And since I have no idea how to use a camera, and you’re basically an expert…” JJ held up the camera already strapped around his neck, and you recognized it as one of the starters provided by the school for photography students. “Come on. You can spare an hour or two on a nature path or something, right?”

“I could, but I don’t necessarily want to.”

JJ sighed and he held his arm out in front of you, effectively stopping you in place but also earning him a sharp glare. “Come on, Cameron. What happened to all that soul-searching and deep talking on Friday? Do you really hate me that much?”

You continue to hold his gaze for precisely fifteen more seconds before you crack. “Fine,” you say pointedly. “But because I’m doing this for free, you’re going to get the barest basics that there are.”

You can see the tension in JJ’s shoulders dissolve and he grins. “You don’t hate me! I knew it” He claps you on the back and starts forward before stopping and turning partially towards you. “But uh— you should probably lead the way.”

The amount of times you’ve rolled your eyes around JJ Maybank has got to be unhealthy, but you do it once more as you start to walk again. “Don’t push your limits.”

He held up his hands in defense. “Are you gonna at least tell me where we’re going?”

You cast a small glance at him out of the corner of your eye. “Keep up and you’ll see.”

You spend the ten minutes that it takes to walk down to the track then over towards the woods to explain the bare basics you’re willing to give him, and to JJ’s credit, you think that he actually listens. Once you arrive at your destination, you spread your arms out to gesture at the woods around you.

“Welcome to the road barely off the beaten path,” you announce, twirling in a small circle as JJ stands a few feet behind you. “Cross country uses this for practice all the time, but the trees provide some decent lighting for some decent pictures.” You look right at him and give him a sarcastic smile. “Perfect for a decent guy.”

He returns your expression with a genuine smile and touches his hand to his heart. “I’m honored that you think so highly of me, Cameron. Now—” You’ve never been so scared for a camera as you are when JJ holds it up to his eye, and you’re more thankful for neck straps than ever. “—you wanna pose and be my first picture for this project?”

And that destroys any magic that had been created by his ever so slight interest in photography, and you answer his question with a glare. He responds by snapping a picture, and you roll your eyes and turn away.

“Perfect.” He grins and holds the camera up so you can see, but you barely even bother as you stick your hands in the pockets of your jacket. JJ sighs and puts the camera down so it’s hanging from his neck again, and he takes a few quick paces to catch up to you. “Are you like this with every person who tries to be nice to you?”

“Just the ones that annoy me.”

“Oh,” he nods. “So literally everyone annoys you.”

“Just about,” you agree. By now the two of you are walking down the path, JJ trailing slightly behind you as he badgers you with questions.

“Well, I don’t know if you could tell by the whole ‘asking you out and trying to get to know you’ thing, but I don’t want to be one of those people.” You stop in place as you turn on your heel and face him, crossing your arms in the process.

“Really?” you ask, slightly bemused.

“Yeah, really.” JJ runs his hand through his hair and shrugs. “I don’t know what it’s gonna take to get off of the list of people you hate, but I’m gonna try my hardest. Because you’re worth it, Cameron. I know that for a fact.”

That leaves you stunned. You’re not even able to think up some kind of witty retort as he starts walking away, and right before the path turns he faces you again. “Same place, same thing, tomorrow after school?”

It takes you a second, but you nod. “I guess.”

JJ smiles and nods as well, taking a few steps backwards as he maintains eye contact with you. “Cool. I’ll see you then, Cameron.”

You’re not even sure how long you stand there like an idiot, just trying to process what happened. By the time that you’re walking back to the school, you’re only really sure of one thing.

JJ Maybank is not who you thought he was. And maybe that’s a good thing.

~~~~~~~~

weird blonde kid: btw my friends and i are throwing a kegger at the boneyard on friday and it’s gonna be huge

weird blonde kid: you should definitely go with me

weird blonde kid: you’ll get so much street cred

you really don’t give up, do you?

i don’t need street cred

weird blonde kid: already told you that you’re worth it

weird blonde kid: i'm in it for the long game baby

weird blonde kid: so is that a yes?

no

weird blonde kid: then is is it a nooooo

no

weird blonde kid: i’ll see you at 9:30 then 😛

-

perm tags: @dv0412 @siriuslyslyslytherin @maruchan77 @simonsbluee @kwyloz

obx: @pogueslandia

ttihay: @maybankbby @gabiatthedisco @the-romanian-is-bae @obx-pogues-4-life @oliviajaegerswhore @chaoticjjmaybank @its-simply-fanfiction @80strashbag @sinnerluh @shephard17895 @onlyangel-444 @silverbyeol @miniiminie

[actualbird]

hey here are some assorted marius/luke ideas that swam around in my head today

wc: 1.3k

contents: 2 of these r kindaaaa smut ideas (and they r marked in the subheader) but i dont put anything detailed explicit, read at ur own risk and choice ig

luke pearce's love language is beating up everybody in stellis who even looks at marius wrong

sorta comedy fic where everybody marius even offhandedly mentions is giving him a hardtime mysteriously ends up in the hospital like, the day after he brings it up.

nobodys dead! but after that person recovers, they keep a wide wide berth from marius, shudders to even think of crossing him again lest that terrifying red eyed force of nature comes back for them and finishes the job.

and marius is like Yeah, Okay, I Think I Know Who's Doing This because luke isnt subtle LMAO. marius is endeared that luke responds to his flirting by blushing and leaving the room immediately but anytime marius is like "ugggghhh, [insert poor shmuck] is really on my ass," luke's expression goes dark. next day, the said poor shmuck in the hospital from both shoulders dislocated, like luke is leaving injured dickbags on marius' doorstep much like a cat would do but this cat is a tad unhinged.

marius eventually confronts luke like "babe, i really appreciate it, but also stop, and can we kiss?" and then they kiss and luke promises to hurt ppl a little bit less.

.....just a smidge.

-

(kinda smut) au where marius is a model and luke is a photographer

comedy that turns into smut maybe because i cant stop thinking about SR Dreams Of Thebes. i want sexy hot model marius and every single photoshoot hes ever done has had him in some state of undress. when he accepts jobs hes like "can my tits be out? even just slightly?" and if hes told no hes like "awwww, boring! thanks for the offer but i'll pass."

luke is the photographer and hes a very good photographer that marius has worked with a LOT. because mc handles the projects luke does and is friends with marius and a lot of her projects just so happen to need a slutty mcthot, so they collab very often.

theyve worked together so much to the point that luke seems to be used to marius being Like That (gorgeous and on display and making bedroom eyes RIGHT AT LUKE and luke has to always remind him "eyes on the camera, not on me!") and marius is like WHYYYY WHYYYY DOESNT HOT PHOTOGRAPHER LUKE PEARCE SUCCUMB TO MY NUBILE CHARMSSSSS

he complains to mc and shes like there there ya big baby. and she pointedly does not tell marius that whenever a shot finishes up, luke goes home IMMEDIATELY, as he is very flustered. it's honestly impressive how unaffected luke makes himself seem because once marius is getting dressed luke is like "I HAVE TO GO" and mc has a suspicion that luke, er, lets out his frustrations the moment he gets home.

she does not tell marius because this is very entertaining. but also because these two are idiots and if theyre gonna get together, they should be the ones doing the work. shes setting up the situations already, the least they could do is actually talk smh

eventually they do talk. but in a convoluted setup where marius asks luke to do a, er, private photoshoot for him. cue sensual photography at marius' art studio (he still paints in this au) where marius starts off fully clothed!! but after every 10 pics hes like okay lets take this off and this off and thiiiiiissss

luke pearce: //horny grip

and then they bang about it

-

(kinda smut) marius: should i be turned on by that? probably not. will that stop me? definitely not.

smut fic. luke very viciously dispatches a person who tried to hurt marius and marius is like "well mark me down as scared and horny" and they bang about it----wait, hold up. i can do this. in my bodyguard au verse. penning THAT down in my possible extras fics HAHA.

but yeah luke is like "WAIT, WHY??? WHY IS THIS WHAT GETS U HOT AND BOTHERED??? (in addition to literally everything else that gets you hot and bothered, it's a very long list, like, luke could just be stretching in the morning and marius wants to pounce)." marius like "why r u complaining, u get my hot bod, i get ur hot bod, this is a win win situation" and honestly! luke cant argue with that!

and so they bang about it

-

it is nacho lucky day

comedy fic AGAIN sorta recycled from a fic i was writing for a prev fandom. marius is off to a movie date with luke when he gets kidnapped which, worrying!

but these kidnappers are hugely incompetent and marius is hugely just sorry for them and tries to tell them "guys, really, let me go. i can see you're not actually up for this and also, uh, not great at it! and i can help you guys out a little bit. but you should deffo let me go because i was on my way to a date and you do not wanna make my boyfriend mad. SERIOUSLY. IM TRYING TO SAVE YOU GUYS."

and the kidnappers r like nope not happening.

cue Luke Pearce Raven swooping in, knives blazing, and marius is like "BABE, NO, STOP, THEY DIDNT HURT ME AT ALL AND ALSO THEYRE STUPID" and luke is like "oh okay!" //drops the terrified kidnapper who he was holding up against the wall by his collar. luke whisks marius off to their date after a stern "dont you dare do that again" to the kidnappers.

and then marius and luke go get their nachos and watch that stupid movie together

-

can we get some neko and dog boys in here? can we PLEASE get some neko and boys in here?

crack treated seriously, comedy, everything is normal but for some whatever reason, marius and luke wake up one day with some new parts. marius has got kitty ears and a tail, luke has got fluffy pointed dog ears and tail.

they are not dating, still pining in this fic, and luke is in agony because every time marius talks to him or even LOOKS AT HIM, luke cant stop his tail from wagging vigorously. at some point, luke just turns to look at his butt and scolds his tail "can you PLEASE STOP GIVING ME AWAY????"

the tail does not listen

marius is mostly unaffected because hes always been an attention whore and whatever emotions the new parts give away were already pretty obvious. he is a bit embarrassed tho that his ears perk up WAYYYY too excited whenever luke walks into a room like. come on, hes tryna be SEXY ALOOF.

actually, to add onto the comedy, mc curiously brings a laser pointer to hq and is like. "huh, i wonder if this will work on you guys."

marius: psssshhhh, i doubt it

luke: yeah, the new parts havent given us any behavioral changes or anything so---

mc: //turns on the laser pointer

marius and luke: //IMMEDIATELY BOLT TO THE FUCKING WALL TO PAP PAP PAP IT

the chaos leads to luke and marius colliding, resulting in them on a heap on the floor, marius on top of luke. theyre having a moment, eyes dart to each others' lips and---

laser pointer at the wall, marius frigging SCRAMBLES TO CATCH IT. luke very softly whining because NOOOOO, COME BACK, I LOVE YOUUUUUUUUU

they get their acts together soon tho and they still have the animal parts and when they cuddle, luke's tail is wagging and marius' tail is swishing contentedly and is marius purring? oh god thats so cute luke is going to die

-

i have a lot of thoughts