#you have no regard for the feelings of others

[precious-little-scoundrel]

|| Radio ||

Requested plot points? ☑️

Circa: early February 1944

Immediate previous fic: Favorite Escape

Summary: when your hodge podge radio won’t work, who should ya call? Probably the flight engineer

Warnings: usual universe warnings apply, 18+ but nothing very alarming really happens in this one, references to others are made, some potential slut shaming in the beginning if ya squint? perhaps some queer baiting but it’s the Buckies rolling around on the flooor, they’re one massive queer bait lbr, it’s not me. Also. My shit Crystal Radio making descriptions- don’t come for me I haven’t made one and I spent five hours falling down a rabbit hole as to how the guys made them in the camps and at the end of the day I said: screw it! And went with one of the Brit’s scenarios 🍻

Edited only by my tired little eyes, full warning and have mercy 💋

Also, just a note I feel compelled to make- this fic centers around women in the army, in a war, which they’re spending under dire conditions in a POW camp. Yes there is love here, there is also hierarchy and discipline and the enforcement of that does not make one character or another necessarily callous or less loving. They are their ranks first and foremost as all signed up for.

“They’re forging papers, you know.” Maureen broached the topic to Egan one day, late February and when her cheeks were still bruised from Ida’s book.

Bucky paused his tracing of a map, sooty finger trailing along a river with the same incomprehensible name as its twin running parallel, he didn’t know anything about papers or anyone making them and she knew that. “Who?”

“Good ones. Identification, passports.” She enumerated.

“Who?”

“The Poles. The ones with the-“

“-the liquor.” he finished for her, remembrance and condemnation heavy in his wry tone. “The ones you stayed out all night with.”

“Stayed long enough for them to get drunk enough to show me.”she replied, without heat, which was surprising.

“Some grand plan of yours, huh?” He bit back a laugh, it was a fine way to cover her ass for being insubordinate. It was a way he’d likely try if he was in her place.

“No.” she swore instead. “Just luck, I happened to see them. They got careless. Maybe an answer to all Jack’s prayers.”

“Yeah. Anything to give that rosary a break.”

“Yeah.”

“You asked them?”

“What for?”

Bucky regarded her with thinning patience but something kept him from snapping, the feeling of a riddle still to be solved. “For some papers.” he clarified, measured and intent, she knew how much easier that would make their plans for Ida.

Maureen shook her head, glancing down at her twisting hands, “I didn’t want to-“ her mouth twisted too, “-I wanted to ask a superior first.”

Bucky considered that for a moment, slightly touched at her newfound wisdom, “Why not ask Buck?”

She shook her head again, auburn hair curling under her chin just so, even here in the stalag she had some traces of the old charm. “He’s got too much to worry about for me to be bringing in hypotheticals.” she was so upset by something she would not even meet John’s eye and he felt a slice of remorse for how he hadn’t even noticed the ground down change in her since she got here, his drinking buddy and the soft fleshed rival of merry old English days was a gruff and battered and sullen woman; being a red blooded American male, he regretted that dismal change. “And I'm worried about what to bargain with. What can I promise? We haven’t got much and I don’t have— there’s not much anyway, but what we’ve got I didn’t wanna promise. Not without-“ she still hadn’t met his eye, he tracked hers; a furious roving of pale blue back and forth across the floorboards and it made Bucky itch.

“Who signs these papers?” Bucky asked, thinking the logistics through, knowing she’d perk up if he brought them up.

“Haven’t a clue. Maybe they haven’t figured that part out yet. I don’t know. I just know they’ve got papers.”

“Good ones.”

“Yeah.”

“We haven’t got much.” he agreed, clicking his teeth in thought, “What’d you give them for the liquor?”

“They just invited me.”

“Didn’t have to lend a hand or nothin’?” he balked and Maureen threw him a glare that seemed more hurt than rage, and chastened by a voice inside that sounded much like his mama’s, he amended with sheepish humor, “Hell, feel like lending a hand myself these days, if it’d get me a whisky.”

Her gnarled fist curled white in her lap, she managed hoarsely, “They just wanted to talk about home. To someone who hadn’t heard about it a million times before.”

“They got cigarettes?” he asked.

“As most common payment for their booze -they’ve got enough to insulate their shack three deep.”

“Cigarettes won’t cut it then.”

“I’ve been thinking.”-

“Yeah?”

“The radio. I’m the only one who doesn’t think it’s worth the risk but, I know, it doesn’t matter, it’s happening. Gale’s going to keep trying. And if it works-“ she rubbed at her eyes, tired and unsure, “-that’s quite the bargaining chip.”

Bucky nodded slowly, eyes narrowing as his smile grew a touch broader, “News of the outside world.” he was half in agreement, “Buck asked for a week. Been four days.”

“He’s stumped.” Maureen retorted instantly. “And he’ll stay that way and he’ll go nuts and you’ll go die going over the fence and then he’ll have no reason left not to die too.”

Bucky whistled, low and chiding, “You’re full of rainbows today, Candy.”

“You know who he oughta ask.” she shook off the barb. “But he won’t. And I don’t want him risking it for this thing anymore than anyone else, but you all want it so bad, and they’ll shoot us for it if it works or not. I’m not asking her. But you would. Might as well get shot for it working, right? Isn't that what you said yesterday? You know who he should ask.”

Bucky’s keen eyes showed the moment it dawned on him, his eyebrows shot up and his mouth sagged and he ran a weathered hand over his face, “Awww shit, Candy.” came garbled behind his palm. “Ah shit.” he said again with conviction as he shoved the hand into his pocket, wretched acknowledgment of her point clear on his face.

“I didn’t want to suggest it, told Ida it’s a fucking dangerous thing and I’ll never forgive if— but you all—“

Bucky grounded aloud, “Nah, nah she’s -Lu would solve it.” he muttered, shushing her. “Demarco really pummeled you the other day, huh?” he added, and that got her to meet his eye, she looked spooked and a little incensed, “Saw him fuckin’ you up behind B compound but sheesh, s’like he hollowed you out worse than a jacolantern; yer shifty as hell.”

“He-“ Maureen still felt like blanching at the memory of Benny’s terribly correct opinions, his disappointed eyes and his fist full of her flight jacket asking her what in the living fuck was wrong with her besides a concussion, a sick childhood and an ever nauseating jealousy of Buck Cleven’s paternal time and effort, “-he had some admonitions. After…after the other night.”

Bucky hummed, shitty smirk taking up residence on his face, “How ‘bout that.”

“I’m gonna be better.” she muttered and Bucky felt for her, could almost taste the echo of his identical and hollow determination to climb the mountain of bad habits when weak from spuds and pneumonia. He told himself the same every morning and fell into bed condoning his failure every night, like a ritual.

“You’re gonna get us those papers.” he corrected, shoving off the wall to come near her, give her the full Major treatment and maybe a friendly hand, “And you can promise your drinkin’ buddies news from the radio.”

Maureen nodded in understanding, no joy or animation left in her green eyes. She used to enjoy a bit of subterfuge, now she only felt hollow misery at the thought that she'd dragged Lu into this, too. This risk she hated so much and yet no one cared. Lu would be glad to be dragged in, it’s true, she was itching at the chance to be useful and to make Gale proud, it’s how the girl was wired. It’s how most girls were wired, Maureen supposed, desperate to make Gale Cleven approve. Lu’s enthusiasm wouldn’t make the sight of her being made to kneel in the mud and have a bullet put in her head any easier, wouldn’t make Maureen feel any less responsible for it when her lifeless body thudded to the earth.

All that lovely goodness stamped out.

Over a radio.

Bucky’s hand felt too hard and too big on her shoulder. He had gone before the vision cleared, mud and wire and the freezing main square at Ravensbruck fading back to the musty bunk room. Maureen shook herself and stood up to make herself somehow appealing, reamniante some semblance of the cheerful rashness that had led her to the Polish combine in the first place: she found it hard to inspire. She’d like to count that a victory but she knew better, she wasn’t reformed she was just tired.

A washed face and a fake smile and the promise of news from outside would have to be enough to bank all their risks on, it would have to be.

“Crank,” she greeted the man in the hall, flashing him clean, water brushed teeth and her gentlest, freshly soot lined eyes, “I’ve been tasked by Major Egan with an errand, spare a minute to babysit me?”

__________________________________

Bucky finds Buck Cleven in his own bunkroom, Demarco outside on watch and that’s all Bucky needs to know to guess the radio is out and Buck’s working like a fiend yet again to make it work. Sure enough, he’s hunched over the table with it, mittened hands shaking from cold and exhaustion and a sheen of sweat on his forehead despite the paltry sweater he wears.

Bucky walks in and Gale gives him a soft, acknowledging glance before continuing to his work. Bucky takes up his usual place behind Buck’s left shoulder to watch and Buck, being used to it, goes on.

“My little Kriegie Marconi, huh?” Bucky allows the nagging impulse he has felt for weeks while standing in this position to finally exert itself, and his forefinger lifts and swirls in the curling gold strands of hair at the nape of Gale’s neck, his friend almost bolts away but then seems to choose a prey’s tactic and just stills, goes very still and Bucky scritches the scalp beneath his grab in assurance he don’t meant anything by it. He doesn’t think he does, at least.

Gale, wary and with a voice close to mechanized it’s so stilted, inquires with ever-present politeness, “You alright Bucky?”

It’s better than that whole ‘major’ business; getting called Major as if that meant shit anymore. “Yeah, ‘course I am.” Bucky rakes his fingers through the hairs there at the nape of that dainty neck, scritches the scalp with all four of his main ones, and uncovers a white long scar sliding round once he lifts the hairs there. “Why wouldn’t I be? Gonna be a father soon.”

Buck does jerk then, away from his touch and wheeling his chair around to glare at Bucky; it’s an impressively executed little pirouette and John misses the feel of his warm neck and oil soft hair. “Jesus John.” he reprimands.

“We’re gonna get outta here Buck.” John swears, he’s so sure of it because he cannot in all his thinking and predicting ever imagine a scenario where they don’t, and he chooses to think it’s not delusion but a good omen. “Ida’s gonna have that baby and when it’s safe we’ll all meet up.”

Gale is looking at him like he’s his own father again, Bucky knows that look, it always makes him equal parts ashamed and desperate, “Jus’ like that.” Gale mocks in a husky gust.

It’s devastating, and it’s intended to be, and Bucky could bear that with better humor if he could still touch Gale and his hair. “Just like that.”

Gale hums and it’s a mean sorta vocalization that makes Bucky’s heart thud and his skin prickle hot, it’s the kinda noise you kiss off a person, he thinks, but it’s Buck and so he doesn’t know what to do with it. “It’s gonna get you killed.” Buck is saying instead and Bucky lets him, “I know you all think she’s cracked up and maybe she has but it wouldn’t hurt to listen to Kendeigh sometimes when she’s tellin’ ya shit that a five year old could accurately guess, -goddamn it.”

His voice rose to a strong rage by the end and Bucky takes a chair opposite him, sick of standing there like a dumb dog waiting for his scolding to be over. “So what.” Bucky challenges him, “We just wait around and Brady pops out a child and the krauts let us keep it and it’s our new mascot and we all sing zippidy doo da, huh? Huh, Buck?”

Gale’s hands fell away from his face with a slam to the table, a shocking degree of anger showing for a split second and it gave Bucky an odd degree of gratification. “I jus’ want you to find a plan with better odds.”

Bucky sniffed and leaned forward, went in for the kill and Gale was looking at him like he expected it, like it was his turn to play daddy to everyone here and Gale for once was so beaten down he wouldn’t just allow the changing of the guard, he was close to angry at its lateness. It made Bucky’s heart thud.

“I’ve been listening to Kendeigh.” Bucky refuted briefly, “And we’ve got a plan.” Gale gave him a tired look of encouragement to go on, “How long’s it been since you slept? Huh, well, we got a plan. Practically perfect, or it will be, just need the radio.”

“Ain’t giving this away.” Gale said, “Not for anythin’, even useless.”

Bucky patted the table top in easy assurance, if he could have reached Buck’s thigh, he’d have patted that instead, “No, no, don’t need to give it away, just need it to work. So,” he softened his voice and his eyes tightened, “I’m callin’ Lu in.”

Oddly, Gale does not fight it. Not aloud, at least. There’s an anguished look of hate on his face and Bucky mirrors it. It’s for this place and the fucking awful choices they have to choose from every goddamn day.

“You run this by Ida?” is all he asks.

Bucky pops his flaking lips audibly, “What, need us both gangin’ up on you to agree? She’ll sign off. Smith’s an officer. Gotta remember that sometimes, Buck.”

The way his Buck swallows hard and dry contradicts his words, “I do remember that.”

“Really?” Bucky’s mouth gives a soft smile of doubtful incredulity and Gale’s mimics it, mournful but a smirk all the same, “Feel like she should answer to ‘Gale’s Baby’ these days. Lieutenant Smith who?”

Gale scoffs, “Careful now.”

“No really, she’s an officer and she wants to be treated like one. It’ll do her good to have work. Her kinda work.”

“Could get her killed.”

“Layin’ in her bunk could do that.”

Gale grunts, its sounds like an agreement.

“So I say Lieutenant Smith gets put on radio detail. Like her goddamn job description suggests. Huh, yeah?”

“Yeah.” Gale lets out a shaky agreement.

“Aaaaand,” Bucky draws it out as he rises again and saunters over to Buck who is ready for him and loose this time, “how bout I go back to bein’ the one you’re frettin’ ‘bout all the time. Got me almost jealous of the girl. How ‘bout I do. Huh?”

Gale’s scoff is fond as anything as he looks up at John with cheerful derision, “And you ‘bout to be a father? Make me an old man? Fuck no, ya looney.”

“Alright.” Bucky concedes with hands up in surrender before lurching forward and grasping Gale’s rickety chair back by its wobbly spokes and hefting it partially off the ground, beautiful and outraged prude of an occupant still seated in it, “Then I’ll play daddy and put you to bed, how ‘bout that.”

“John Egan for fucks sake-“ Gale’s fists pounded on the meat of his shoulders and his outraged protests wafted against Bucky’s neck and his jabbing knees collided with the meat of his thighs and Bucky hadn’t felt so close to him or so happy to be alive since England.

“Major sir, the hell is goin’ on?” Demarco’s tame inquiry from the safety of the doorway made them both lose their grapple and they collided together onto the floor, bunk bed barely missed by their heads and the hapless chair mixed up between their limbs.

Bucky grinned, hip sore from his fall and kidneys suffering from Buck’s trapped elbow there, “Puttin’ Goldilocks to bed.” he replied.

DeMarco processed that and the scene before him with grave sobriety before saluting lazily and turning to go, “Right on, sir.”

John did his best to rise up without further pinching Gale who was indeed trapped beside him and beneath him, chair legs wound between a lanky human leg in a puzzle that Bucky realized might take some caution to untangle without harm. Strangely, Buck wasn’t moving, he was just looking up at him like a cat would their clumsy master who has done somethin’ stupid which was a surprise to neither. It was so innocuous a look and so nostalgic, it winded Bucky with the realization he hadn’t seen it in ages, just as he hadn’t felt his boney ribs against his own and the feel of his elegant hands yanking him around in a fight. This miserable place really was stomping out the glow in the best people.

“Ya know Buck,” he ventured, clearing his throat for extra casualness, “I’ve missed you.” When Gale only kept looking up at him, perfect porcelain face with its unsettling scars and wary eyes without a lick of storm in them, John Egan grabbed his shovel and dug his own grave a little deeper, drug a finger down his cheek. “Missed all this.”

Bucky didn’t know what he meant by “this” but it felt safer and worse all at once, since he did miss Buck but he and Buck never used to hang out on floors with a chair as chaperone. Mercifully, Buck neither points that out nor moves away, acting very much like he needed to heaped on the floor with Bucky and a stray chair every bit as much as John did. Like it’s doing him good.

“And you couldn’t’ve jus’ said.” Gale murmurs with the softest eye roll of the century and Bucky feels like beaming and it must show in his face so strong and bright after a sunless winter that after a flash Gale’s cheeks flame from it and he averts his eyes.

“I dunno Buck, could I?” Egan asks one blushing cheek and Gale hasn’t got a good reply for that, so they just lay there on the floor.

“Go on now, get off me.” Gale doesn’t shove at him, he presses his hand to John’s forehead like he would a dog and John goes, obedient as one.

———————————————————————-

They found Lu with Murph and Benny and Brady, measuring out what seemed to be lot lines between Love Shack #9 and the next combine, boot scuffed perimeters already visible in the light snow and drawn in a decently tidy rectangle. There were guards loitering nearby, nosey as always with their cigarettes and their antsy dogs anytime someone did something out there besides piss or pace or stare at the fence.

“What’s all this?” Bucky inquired cheerfully, coming up to them with Gale, bundled and shivering behind him.

Benny looked up from tilling a furrow with his boot, right where Lu’s mittened finger pointed out. “It’s for the garden. S’posed to be spring before long.”

“A Chicago man oughta know better, Benny.” Egan snarked.

“Need us?”

Bucky sniffed, a casual set to his body that belied his quest, “Just the little one.”

Smith promptly looked startled, then eager. “All well Majors?”

“Need your advice on the color of my cufflinks with this suit.” Bucky extended his arm and beckoned her, “C’mon back in for a minute. One of you too, need a watch to go with the cufflinks.”

———————————————————————

With Benny on guard, Brady and Kendeigh having excavated the radio’s shell from the floorboard and table leg in which it resided, the Buckies stood over Smith’s small frame as she sat at the table and inspected the simplistic device with keen eyed appreciation for the construct.

“It’s really marvelous.” she assured Cleven, running her fingers over the carefully coiled wire and precarious pin.

Gale didn’t even crack a smile. “What’s wrong with it?” he asked instead.

She shook her head, a frown gathering. “Never made one-“ she cautioned.

“-but you get the idea.”

“Yes sir, I do.”

“So what’s wrong.”

Lu ran her fingers over the wire, again and again, the dusty metal not insulated, just bare copper, likely stripped from somewhere. It reminded her of early days as a cadet when they threw chicken wire mixed with hydraulic lines at herself and her fellow rookie engineers and told them to sort it, testing to see if they knew which was which. It had been so rudimentary she had wanted to laugh until she realized others were being flunked.

This was so basic she was stumped.

“Take your time, Lu.” Bucky spoke up after a burdened pause during which she could almost feel Major Cleven breathing down her neck.

“Candy, can I try with the headphone?” she asked at last, frustrated and out of her element, just a few months out of a plane and she had already lost her touch.

Maureen passed it over and Lu pressed it to her ear, not to discern what was quite obviously radio silence, but to imagine the whole process in reverse, track it down the cord all the way to the base, each possible breakdown of the conduction.

She fingered the ramshackle diode with burgeoning suspicion. “What’s your crystal?”

“That’s just…lead.” Cleven muttered.

“From?”

“Ground pencils.” Bucky supplied cheerfully.

Smith bit her lip, “We need sulfur added. Lead won’t conduct on its own.” She figured Cleven knew that, the grim and unmoving set of his mouth suggested so.

“Just- sulfur?” Maureen asked.

“If I had sulfur we could add it to the lead dust, ignite it and-“ Smith grinned at Kendeigh, knowing that she alone may have shared her enjoyment of a small conflagration from time to time, “burn it down and you’ve got something close enough to Galena. Just need a pinch of it should work.”

Bucky shoved his hands in his pockets and surveyed the mostly morose room. All except for the two girls grinning at each other over the hypothetical of a little chemistry experiment in a highly flammable wooden combine.

“We’ve got sandy soil.” Buck’s contemplative drawl spoke up, “Dunno if we could extract enough pure sulfur.”

Maureen stared back at Egan instead, “Other sectors have gotten portions of kits, chemistry kits, radio kits, they’ve been smuggled in with all sorts of stuff. Inside of a violin, oat bags. Nothing to fully build something. They might have sulfur. I could make inquiries and- well, Jack could pick it up next time the band goes over C compound to entertain the poor Aussie bastards.”

“How do you kno- nevermind, actually. Nevermind.” Bucky broke off, “Alright. Sure, why not. Ya sure that’s it?” he asked Lu once more.

She gave a helpless little shrug. “Gotta be. Or the wire’s dirty. Where’d it come from anyway?”

Gale gave Bucky a long suffering look as Bucky seemed to swell a couple inches and bounce back on his heels at the mention of his scrounging prowess. “The lamp.” he nodded above them all.

Jack Brady scoffed, short, clipped, betrayed, “That why it cuts out all the time? Strobed us so bad last night -thought the room was possessed.”

“Sacrifices Jack, sacrifices.”

———————————————————

Benny had hauled in enough water buckets to elicit some negative attention from the guards, and when the inspection came the inmates of the Love Shack insisted the drenched floors and table of the Majors’ barracks were due to sanitation post regurgitation. At night, with only one stolen torch light from Combine 15 to illuminate the endeavor, a basin of water beneath a smaller bowl in which lay their precious and recently procured ingredients, a science experiment began. The Majors and Ida gathered round, all looking as ghastly and spectral in the light of the flashlight as Brady’s fake ghost. It held the thrill of a bonfire night except for the stakes, which all in the room did their best not to dwell on.

“Zippo, Candy.” Lu gave the word and Maureen, with only the protection of Ida’s bent aviators to keep from a scorched cornea, flicked on her lighter and set the mixed powders ablaze.

It flamed up high and smelly, making Benny gag and mutter something about Meatball’s gas to a tittering Brady, and then died down to a yellow smoking ember.

“We should let it sit.” Lu surmised with a squeeze to Maureen’s only somewhat singed hand, her big dark eyes surveying the burnt bowl and their smoking experiment with glittery excitement at the possibility of success, “Let it cool, settle, maybe strain it. Can you get me a net? Oh Candy come now, get me a strainer?” she begged with a laugh as Maureen rolled her eyes at the idea of yet another trip to the Stalag Market for the most random items imaginable. If they hoped to not be suspicious, they’d need better lies or more money.

“How about cheesecloth?” Kendeigh tried not to grin indulgently- and failed- in the face of Lu and having recently been allowed to set something on fire

Lu kissed her cheek. “Cheesecloth would be perfect.”

In the end, cheesecloth did indeed prove perfect, and amongst the burnt dust of the combined minerals was a gritty little pinch full of the needed crystals. Or so Lu said, Gale agreed but the crease between his brows hadn’t lifted for two days; Bucky’s fingers had begun to twitch in antsy need to manually smooth them out. He imagined Maureen felt the same but she hadn’t said, uncharacteristically forbearant now she had some job to keep her sane. Even if it was playing fetch for Lu.

—————————————————————

“Well, this is it.” Gale muttered when the watch had been set once more, Murph and Hambone on the steps, Crank inside, Brady at the door, Benny at the window. Even Major Clark had joined them in the barracks for this final try and Lu’s cheeks were maroon from the attention even as her deft hands steadily pressed her concoction beneath its intended rod.

“Pass me the pliers, sir?” She asked and for a moment, the teacher became the apprentice and Gale fetched her the stalag forged tool, rudimentary like everything here yet the gripped and pulled and lifted same as the pliers back home. “You could check your look in this wire’s reflection.” She complimented Gale’s buffing of the copper wire.

He shrugged in turn. “Didn't wanna leave anythin’ to chance. That it?” he asked as her hands stalled and she surveyed her work.

Lu nodded solemnly. “Yes sir.”

Gale picked up the headphone from in front of him on the table like it was a gun he was about to bring to his head. “Here.” He extended it to her instead, “S’right, it was your job, you should be the first. Cmon.”

Despite her voiceless protest he pressed the headphones into her hands and Lu, never knowing how to disobey an officer, folded immediately.

For a good ten seconds everyone in the room held their breath as Smith pressed the headphone to her ear and gently wiggled the clothespin along the wire, searching and tuning, her face holding that old peaceful concentration they hadn’t seen since the last mission. She was at home with her mind tuned to another dimension. The pilots in the room knew that look, that was the look of someone at home with something that terrified them all the same, the gut swooping feeling of clearing the take off and sledding along the tops of the clouds. Wrong and strange and utterly incomparable to others, it was the closest to home one’s mind could be. Lu belonged somewhere on those electric currents and searching them out was like finding oneself again.

Then at last, Lu’s eyes sharpened out of their dreamy haze of concentration and she said, gentle as always, “It’s the BBC sir.”

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@gamechangershow @el-shab-hussein @ibtisam-d @riding-with-the-wild-hunt @fairuzfakhira @fallahsart @sayruq @humanvoreture @kaapstadgirly @sar-soor @dimostheniskapa @plomegranate @commissions4aid-international @nabulsi27 @stil-macher @soon-palestine @communitythings @palestinegenocide @ghost-and-a-half @annoyingloudmicrowavecultist @feluka-blog-blog @toughknit @timetravellingkitty @briarhips @dirhwangdaseul @shesnake @akajustmerry @himejoshikaeya @camgirlproject @rhubarbspring @schoolhater @transmutationisms @feluka @fiqriahfadzil @irhabiya @wellwaterhysteria @aristotel @ankle-beez @lonniemachin @dykesbat @watermotif @vakarians-babe @determinate-negation @brutaliakent @shehzadi @sivavakkiyar @communistkenobi @biconicfinn

Hand in hand we can do a lot. 🙏🇵🇸✌🏻❤️

Best regards.

[aloeveratarot]

what you don't see about yourself

pick a card ᡣ𐭩

note: this is just a short general reading so if anything does not seem to resonate please simply let it go. feedback and requests are very welcome.

extended reading is on my patreon ᡣ𐭩

pile 1:

two of wands, lover, prostitute

you may lack confidence in your love life ~ you may believe that you are not worthy enough or good enough to maintain a romantic connection. i'm getting the sense that for a majority this is tied into self-worth, body image or just low self-esteem. however, others can effortlessly imagine you in a loving relationship, capable of being loved and deservingly so. they see you for all the good you have to offer ~ especially in regards to your love life. other people can see how you can make another person fulfilled romantically ~ you're attractive inside and out. i believe all you truly lack is confidence in yourself.

pile 2:

nine of swords, virgin, guide

you may not realise that you tend to take on more than you can chew at times. you might often spread yourself thin yet refuse to realise you want (and even need) to take a few steps back for your own sake. others see that you are in need of some rest, relaxation and self care. some of you may even need to hear that you should seek out guidance from a professional or simply start listening to the advice of others and their concerns. right now, your needs should come first and you should start by validating your own feelings rather than ignoring them.

pile 3:

nine of pentacles, five of swords, damsel

you don't see that you are capable of achieving anything in life ~ you are in a fortunate disposition where you can succeed in any path. however, you likely place limits on how far your abilities can extend, which is just simply false. you may feel stuck and even indecisive but the world is your oyster and i get the sense that no matter what doors open for you, you'll be able to support yourself in the end. you tend to completely underestimate your skills and abilities ~ if you were to allow yourself to take a step forward you may prove to yourself that you are far more competent than you once thought.

[the-one-and-only-elita]

One thing that I absolutely love about TFOne's writing is that it manages to avoid a lot of the heavier criticism I've seen regarding MegOp's hero/villain dynamic over the years (trust me, the mid-2010s TF discourse was crazy)

*Spoilers Below*

First of all, the narrative benefits so much from the main 4 cast members all being a part of the same exploited mining class. So many takes on MegOp have Orion being of a higher status (an archivist, a cop, etc) while Megatron is much lower down on the social latter (a miner, a gladiator, often in the context of being a slave).

I've seen many people be put off by this, because it feels as if Megs is being villianized for being rightfully angry at the system that deeply harmed and exploited him, while Orion/Optimus is praised for taking a more pacifistic stance despite him not suffering as much from or in some ways even benefiting from the system he claims to oppose. I don't find their dynamic to be as simple as that, and I do find these takes to be a bit reductive, but I do very much see where they are coming from.

I am definitely one of those people who's very frustrated with the way pacifism is hailed as the one true path of morality, and the inherent implication that taking any sort of revenge on the people who abused/exploited you makes you just as bad as them. Also, Marvel's particular brand of demonizing any form of radical political action, despite the system clearly being broken and corrupt, but being completely unwilling to offer any other alternatives to meaningfully change things for the better.

When looking at what I described above its pretty easy to see how a lot of versions of MegOp's hero/villain dynamic unfortunately fits into that trope. Bringing it back to TFOne, you can see how Op and Meg coming from the same political/social status subverts this. The existence of Elita and Bee only further illustrates that out of the 4 people of the mining class who were all deceived, exploited, and literally mutilated in the same way it is only D-16 that completely loses himself to his rage, even to the point where he loses compassion for his own companions and disregarding the safety of the other miners (when he decides to "tears everything down" and Elita exclaims he's going to "kill everyone").

What I think I love most about the characterization in TFOne is that Orion is the radical one. Not only that, but he is praised by Elita and by extension the narrative for it. He is constantly challenging authority, and is the first to have the suspicion that their society is structured in an unjust way.

Meanwhile D-16, to be frank, is kind of a bootlicker. He fully believed in the system and that Sentinal Prime, as someone with power, had the right to decided "what was best" for those who are weaker/lesser (I wish I had the specific quote from D-16 to support this, but the movie's still in theaters). It illustrate that D-16 already held certain fascistic ideals, and that he and Orion already have fundamentally opposing moral/political values, it simply hasn't been of any consequence yet. It shows that their eventual falling out was inevitable, even if they had decided to rebuild Cybertron together.

It should also be noted that D-16's feelings of anger and betrayal do not necessarily have anything to do with the unjust system itself, but that said unjust system was predicated on a lie. Hence his fixation on deception in the post-credits scene and him naming his faction the Decepticons. Meanwhile, when Orion learns the truth he's just sort of like "yeah, I always kinda knew something was up" because again, he understood on some level that their system was predicated on injustice.

Even D-16's obsession with Megatronus Prime, while initially an endearing aspect of his character, is also an indicator of the questionably large amount of value he puts on one's strength. It foreshadows the "might makes right" ideology that the decepticons follow, and is a key part of their ideological characterization across continuities.

Instead of the narrative we often see in Transformers media were Optimus is idolized by the narrative for being more moderate and Megatron is villiainized for being radical (or so people often claim), it is instead Optimus who is rewarded and praised by the narrative for being radical, and Megatron who is villainized and punished by the narrative for holding potentially fascistic values.

I do agree with some criticism I've seen that the whole thing with killing Sentinel and D-16's final turn into villainy felt a bit rushed and more than a little cliche, but I also understand it both had a limited runtime and that it is ultimately a family film meant to be accessible to children. More importantly though, I think the movie set the groundwork early on that, no matter how this final act played out, D-16 was always going to turn to darkness, and Orion would not have been able to stop him.

Its perfectly tragic, the way all MegOp should be, while also feeling really well thought out from a thematic standpoint. I love it.

[retroaria]

boyfriend rin headcannon queen?

a/n: holy shit how have i gone this long without making rin bf headcanons??? thank you anon im gonna give you a kith 💋

˚｡⋆❀˖° BOYFRIEND RIN ˚｡⋆❀˖°

❀ Itoshi Rin x gn!reader | all characters aged up 18+ | SFW

BLUE LOCK M.LIST | requests are open! | enjoy 🐢 -aria

pre-boyfriend!rin who is much less intimidated by his feelings for you than people may expect. he understands how he feels and he accepts it, but no way in hell is he telling you about them. he tries to push them down as far as he can for as long as he can. doesn’t want the distraction and is a little insecure about how he’ll be as a boyfriend.

pre-boyfriend!rin who goes out of his way to introduce himself to you, help you out with stuff, get things for you that you need, but not without complaining (as if he isn’t giddy at the thought of just being around you). “Seriously, you can’t do this on your own? If you’re going to hurt yourself doing it then just let me handle it.”

pre-boyfriend!rin who gets jealous and possessive as if you’re already his partner. tries to get your attention on him instead of others without showing how he’s feeling. always makes it a little too obvious though, especially when he literally grabs your arm and pulls you away. “That guy’s a loser, just stay with me and he won’t bother you.”

pre-boyfriend!rin who invites you to hang out just to sit and talk in his room, invites you to his games and practices, gets defensive about introducing you to his teammates, and proceeds to act as if all that isn’t couple level interaction. rin finds solace in the thin line he walks between acting like you best friend and acting like your boyfriend. he likes the way he gets to act in regards to you without actually having to explain himself or his feelings. however, the thought that you aren’t actually his and could be taken from him at any time is enough to push him past his comfort zone and lead to his confession.

pre-boyfriend!rin who lets his feelings build up to an unbearable point and only then does he confess to you. his confession comes off a little passive aggressive. he isn’t sure how to explain how he feels without saying that you did this to him or you did that to him and he had no other choice but to fall in love with you. he unintentionally rambles on during his confession, drawing it out a bit too much because he isn’t sure when to stop, and he could honestly go on forever about how much and how deeply he feels for you. slowly but surely his tone becomes more affectionate and he shuts up in a moment of embarrassment awaiting your response.

boyfriend!rin who so quickly loses the tough guy act once you guys start dating. the beginning stages of physical touch and intimacy hit him like a semi truck and he can’t help but melt into a puddle any time he gets to be in your arms. he slugs over to you after practice and games, still sweaty and heaving, and plops himself over your shoulders. tries his best not to put all his weight on you but just enough for him to feel cradled. he swears laying in bed with you is some kind of mind control ritual that you perform on him because how else could you get him to so easily open up and share a piece of his mind with you? the stillness of the night, the softness of the sheets, the comforter, and your skin against his; it makes him feel so safe he doesn’t even let the words that come out of his mouth process in his brain first.

boyfriend!rin who takes you on very sweet and simple dates. likes sitting by the water with you, walking along the beach or at the park. he likes aimlessly kicking a soccer ball around with you in his backyard while you guys talk. dates with him feel more like hangouts, but sometimes he does like to put in a little extra effort to make it something special.

boyfriend!rin who has absolutely no wandering eye or intentions of being with anyone else. remember how difficult it was for him to just be with you? nah, no way is he doing that again. plus he’s got the best partner in the world so it’s not like he would ever want to risk that. because of this he would let you have a lot of say in his appearance. his haircuts, his clothes, even the body wash and cologne he wears. obviously he still wouldn’t let you choose something that he doesn’t like, but he wants you to like all of it too and he doesn’t mind catering to your preferences on him. you’re the only person he’s trying to impress and he wants you to feel confident about that.

boyfriend!rin who secretly wants everyone to know you’re his but also doesn’t want to make a spectacle out of you. he tells his teammates about you, occasionally will post about you, and he comments on all your posts. I can’t imagine him doing a hard launch, but he’s not afraid to mention in interviews or in conversation that he is in fact taken and in love.

boyfriend!rin who greatly appreciates the advice and support that you give him. he’s got some issues he needs to work through, and he feels so lucky to have you by his side. not judging him or scolding him for acting the way he does, but instead teaching him love in new ways and guiding him towards better understanding of others and behavior. he really starts taking things more seriously when you’re around, specifically in regards to separating his attitude on the field and off the field. he holds you like water in his hands and he wants that to help him learn how to show others and himself that same tenderness when necessary.

boyfriend!rin who is very possessive but not over protective. he lets you go out and dress up and look hot for the whole world to see. he trusts you with his whole heart and the idea of someone trying to hit on you while he isn’t there doesn’t scare him. he does hate when people hit on you while he is there though, it makes his blood boil. he goes into predator mode and literally forces you to cling to him like you’re his cub. he’s definitely the type to fight with other guys in your instagram comment section, would stop after you tell him that it’s kind of embarrassing though lol. god forbid someone from a rival team makes a comment after seeing you at one of his games, he’s literally devouring them on the pitch and then probably trying to beat the shit out of them after.

boyfriend!rin who purposely puts things on the highest shelves in your shared apartment so that you have no other choice but to ask him for help. he reaches up and grabs whatever you need, handing it to you with the stupidest smirk on his face.

boyfriend!rin who always needs to have some point of contact with you when you’re together. he isn’t big on pda at all and would cringe if you tried to be excessive about it, but he will admit he just needs your hand in his almost all of the time. if not that then he’ll opt for placing his hand on your lower back or on your thigh.

boyfriend!rin who is so whipped that he looks through your socials and his personal pictures of you multiple times a day when he’s away for games. he genuinely gets homesick for you and hates the feeling. calls you when he wakes up in the mornings and before he goes to bed at night, and of course is texting you throughout the day. he’s not a gimmicky guy but he loves getting you little souvenirs from the different countries he visits. his gifts are always tasteful and he knows what you like so don’t worry.

boyfriend!rin who is the best gift giver! he’s so doting and attentive that he knows you like the back of his hand and never fails to surprise you with items, trips, events, etc. that you absolutely love.

boyfriend!rin who is super freaking awesome and cute and im only writing this bc i feel weird ending the post on something random lol. all hail rin itoshi. the rin stans have convinced me!!

LOOOOORD forgive me i know it’s been like a week since my last official post but im a working woman, a single mom who works two jobs who loves her kids and never stops with gentle hands and the heart of a fighter im a survivor bro yall wouldn’t understand. anyways im trying to get back on my regular posting schedule bc i have so many requests to fulfill so stay tuned aria nation - peace out ✌️

[aniimoni]

Do you have a Lamb reference for your COTL Lamb design + do they have a name and what's their personality like? (asking because I wanna draw them)

AHHHHH I’m taking this as an opportunity to gush about my lamb, if you don’t mind anon.

First things first:

There you go, HtK AU updated ref, all nice and pretty (Hello Balls, don’t mind this)

Now, as for your other questions:

My lamb doesn’t have a name! They are mostly referred to as “Lamb”, “Holy Lamb”, plus some other nicknames. They DID have a name, but they’ve grown detached from it due to godhood getting the best of them (more on that laterrrr)

PERSONALITY!!!!! Boy do they have a personality. I would say that pre-final battle they were VERY animated. Like- look at this:

It was difficult for them to adapt this “non-chalant” manner that was expected of them. They have always been an expressive, genuine, and “chalant” being.

But of course,, uhhhhhh…….. “lore stuff” happened.

After that, they’re more cold towards their followers (though they will put an act up sometimes), with some exceptions, of course (cough disciples cough cough)

They also develop a temper problem.

Which may or may not be mostly reserved for someone special 😇

It just really depends on which lamb we’re looking at.

Pre-Final Battle: animated, expressive, genuine, “chalant”

Post-Final Battle: mostly cold/distant (with exceptions), in-genuine, situationally temperamental

Honestly, I am REALLY glad you sent this ask because I got to talk about my lamb EVEN MOREEEEEE!!!! I’m pretty proud of how far I’ve come regarding the way that I draw them.

(btw, person who sent an ask asking more questions about the keloid: I’m working on it, I promise!!! Thank youuuuu!!!!)

Augh god, anon, there’s just so much I could tell you about my lamb- but I will spare all of you. Though now i’m wondering who exactly is behind this 🤨 Anyhow, this was very sweet! Don’t feel pressured to draw my lamb 🫶🏼 You got me to actually go through with my plan to redraw the reference page I had lol

[bruhnze]

PLAYING FOR KEEPS

CHAPTER 1 – United in Manchester (Ona Batlle x Lucy Bronze)

Summary: Ona Batlle has had a crush on Lucy Bronze for a little while now… how will it go when she joins Barça? A 10 chapter series.

Warnings: Slow burn, angst, fluff, smut. All the things, but I give this as a complete warning for the whole series. Not every chapter involves all the warnings :).

Wordcount: the series is around 50k words (10 chapters)

Note: no Spanish or Catalan is used for continuity purposes, probably most team dialogue you just have to imagine it being not in english xx.

Summer 2023

Ona closed her final suitcase, her last belongings packed away. Most of her things had already made the journey to her new apartment in Barcelona, leaving her with only a few essentials like a couple of shirts, a pair of jeans and her toothbrush.

Tomorrow marked the official farewell to Manchester United, a place that had been her home for the past few years. Although the team had already celebrated her departure with a party, this final day felt like the true goodbye. After tomorrow, she would close the chapter on her England adventure and return to her beloved Catalonia to begin a new journey with FC Barcelona. Joining Barça again was a dream come true, as she regarded it as the best football club in the world. Despite her excitement for the future, there was also a little sadness with leaving behind Manchester and all the memories she had made there. It made the farewell bittersweet, goodbyes were never easy.

As Ona gathered the last of her things for her hand luggage tomorrow, her gaze fell on her small, worn diary. This little book had been her loyal companion through the highs and lows of her Manchester adventure. Unlike her other personal items that been shipped off in boxes, this diary was something she couldn’t part with like that. It had been her friend during tough times and a place to celebrate her victories. Every page was filled with a piece of her journey, from the rivalries to the moments of joy she had shared with new people she had met.

Flipping through the final pages, Ona’s eyes lingered on the section at the back of the booklet she had dedicated to players she admired and when she’d played them. One of who was Lucy Bronze. She had always felt a special kind of feeling towards the defender, she was drawn to her. And with Lucy now becoming her teammate at Barça, Ona felt a surge of excitement at the thought of finally sharing the pitch with her idol on the same side.

This part of her diary held memories of their past encounters, it described Ona’s admiring for Lucy’s talent and her growing ambition to be just as great as her, or maybe even greater, although she didn’t know if that was possible.

19 January 2020 – WSL – Manchester City 3-0 Manchester United“This match was tough. I tried my best to contain, but Manchester City was relentless. I remember one moment vividly—Lucy managed to slip past us and set up a goal with such ease. It was a harsh lesson in what it means to be at the top. Even though it stung, I couldn’t help but admire her skill. I wish to be as good of a right back as her”

13 February 2021 – WSL – Manchester City 3-0 Manchester United ‘’We faced City again, and it felt like déjà vu. Lucy seemed to be everywhere at once, and despite our best efforts, we couldn’t turn the tide. Losing like this for the second time was hard, but it only strengthened my resolve.” 9 October 2021 – WSL – Manchester City 2-2 Manchester United“This game was a nail-biter. We managed to hold City to a draw. Lucy made a brilliant run just after half time, but we managed to recover in time. Walking off the pitch, I felt a mix of pride and respect. Lucy’s talent was undeniable, and this game was a reminder of just how high I had to reach. We shook hands and she said ‘good game’ to me.” 24 February 2022 – She Believes Cup – England 0-1 Spain “Beating England was a sweet victory, but Lucy’s presence on the pitch was undeniable. Her leadership pushed us to our limits, I noticed how she figured our play out, and directed her players, but luckily we were scored a goal. This game was a turning point for me, a chance to measure myself against the best and it was an important step for Spain.” 13 March 2022 – WSL – Manchester United 1-0 Manchester City“Finally, we got the win we’d been chasing with United. I intercepted a pass from Lucy, leading to the goal that secured our victory. It was a moment of personal victory, knowing that I had finally gotten the better of one of my greatest rivals. Although she as a player is still better then me, our team was better this time.” 20 July 2022 – UEFA Women’s Euro 2022 – England 2-1 Spain“We came close, but England clinched the win, it was a tough loss. Seeing Lucy lift the trophy was a powerful reminder of the heights I aspired to. It was a tough pill to swallow, but England’s success was a testament to the dedication and skill required to reach the top. I vow to come back stronger with Spain, I believe we will come back stronger.” 20 August 2023 – FIFA Women’s World Cup 2023 – Spain 1-0 England“Winning the World Cup was incredible, but I couldn’t help but feel for Lucy. Seeing her disappointment was a stark reminder of how fleeting triumphs can be and how hard it is to stay at the top. It also highlighted the thin line between success and heartbreak. It made me even more excited to join her at Barça and hopefully share many successes together. I walked after her to comfort her when I saw her tears, she walked away at first and I didn’t know if it was my place to consolidate her, but I felt the urge to do it and in the end I feel like she got cheered up a little. I can’t wait to spend more time together when we play for the same team. She said she was excited for me to join too. We even saw eachother inside again, in the tunnel, there we had another quick conversation, she was already analyzing the game in her head, she told me I had an amazing game. I thanked her and then we hugged. She thanked me for coming after her, and then she laughed and told me to go celebrate.”

As Ona closed the diary, she felt a profound sense of gratitude, each little reflection told a story of growth, rivalry and respect. She was filled with a mix of excitement and anticipation. She was about to join a team that included Lucy Bronze, a player she had always admired from afar. The prospect of working alongside her idol, and now also her teammate, was both thrilling and daunting. She couldn’t wait to maybe even become friends with the English defender.

Recently, during last winter, Ona had met Lucy Bronze off the field, at the wedding of their mutual friend Lucy Staniforth. It was a different experience entirely - Lucy turned out to be even kinder and more down-to-earth than Ona had imagined. Their day together was filled with laughter, personal anecdotes and even some dancing, breaking down the barriers of their on-pitch rivalry.

Despite the connection they shared that day, Ona had hesitated to reach out to Lucy afterward, doubting whether the English defender would welcome the contact. Stani had reassured her that Lucy would have appreciated it, but Ona’s lingering uncertainty had held her back.

She was just another stranger to Lucy right, they only knew eachother vaguely from being rivals, Lucy didn’t know, and didn’t need to know, how much Ona looked up to her. Especially with their coming colleagueship for the same team, it would be a little unprofessional, and not to speak of the fact it was embarrassing.

…

Ona took a deep breath and looked around her very-soon-to-be-former training ground, she allowed herself a moment to appreciate her journey. The rivalries here, the victories, the defeats - they had all shaped her, preparing her for this new step ahead. Finally she had build enough experience to play for Barça’s first team with a big contract this time.

The cool Manchester air was heavy with nostalgia as she walked towards the building one last time. The crisp morning light filtered through the clouds, casting a soft, almost melancholic glow over the pitch.

As Ona moved into the busy locker room, memories of her time here flooded back, each one a bittersweet reminder of her impending departure.

Preparing for her final practice session, Ona's mind drifted back to a series of encounters that had come to define her time in England. Her time in England had been transformative. She had arrived in Manchester with a mix of excitement and dread, eager to prove herself in a new league and a new country. The transition had been challenging—the climate, the culture, the language—all required adjustments. Yet, as the months rolled by, Ona had found herself adapting and thriving. Manchester, with its gray skies, had become a part of her journey in ways she hadn’t expected.

One of the best things about her time here had been the friendships she’d built. The locker room, once an intimidating place, had turned into a second home. As Ona walked by the familiar lockers, she felt a little tug in her chest, knowing she’d soon leave it behind.

Lucy Staniforth sauntered over with a smile, but a hint of sadness. "So, last practice, huh? You ready for it?"

Ona gave a small laugh, even though her throat tightened. "I think so? It’s weird, though. Feels like I just got here, and now it’s already over."

Lucy nodded, her arm slipping around Ona’s shoulder as they sat down together. "It’s going to be so strange without you. You’ve gotta keep in touch, yeah?"

"Of course," Ona said, smiling. "And you’re always welcome to visit, you know that."

Just then, Mary Earps wandered over, her face showing how much she’d miss her too. "Onita!!!" Mary said, with a raised voice, drawing attention from the whole team. "You better invite me to sunny Barcelona at least once."

Ona pulled Mary into a tight hug, laughing. "Ofcourse."

Although the team had already held a goodbye party last week, they gathered around Ona one by one again, each declaring how much they were going to miss the tiny Spaniard and asking to be invited to her house or a fc Barcelona match when to opportunity was there.

…

The next morning, the reality of her move finally hit, but instead of feeling nervous, Ona was filled with excitement. A new life in Barcelona was waiting!

The club had set up a beautiful, modern apartment for her close to the training facilities. Her family had already sent her photos of all her things neatly unpacked. Everything looked perfect, but with one thing still missing—herself, and ofcourse her little dog Coco.

Ona felt a twinge of sadness as she checked Coco in for the flight. She hated that he had to travel in the hold, away from her, but she knew the flight wasn’t too long and they would soon be walking the sunny streets of Barcelona together.

During the flight Ona gazed out the window. She watched the familiar English countryside fade away and not much longer then two hours, the vibrant colors of Spain came into view, the bright sun shining down on the city below. The lively atmosphere of Barcelona, so different from Manchester’s gray skies, felt like a warm welcome.

When she had landed and gathered all her belongings and Coco, Ona’s heart skipped a beat as she spotted her family waiting for her. Her brother was holding a colorful sign that read “Welcome home Ona!”, but it was her mother’s open arms that she rushed into first.

Hugging her mother tightly, Ona felt a wave of relief and happiness wash over her. She had missed this—missed the warmth and comfort of her mother’s embrace, the real feeling of being home. Her father and brother joined the hug, and for a moment, everything felt perfect.

As they drove to her new apartment, Ona couldn’t help but smile as she looked out at the familiar sights of her beloved city. This was it, her dream was finally coming true. She had faced the challenges of living in England, grown as a player, and now she was back in Barcelona, ready to play football she had always dreamed of.

Surrounded by her family and with Coco by her side, Ona knew she was exactly where she was meant to be.

…

After a drive which wasn’t supposed to take this long, but with all the traffic in the streets of Barcelona, it did, Ona and her parents finally arrived at her new apartment. Her brother had already said goodbye after their greeting in the airport.

The moment she stepped inside, she felt happy. Her belongings already unpacked, made the place feel like home. The afternoon was spent in the company of her parents, laughing together and talking about the exciting time laid ahead.

They had ordered some local food, paella ofcourse, to celebrate her return to Spain. And as the sun dipped below the horizon, they sat around the small kitchen table, enjoying their first meal in her new home.

Ona’s mother fussed over her, making sure everything was in its place, while her father admired the view from the balcony. Ona ensured them for the hundred time she would be okay and they could go.

Finally Ona’s parents began to gather their things, preparing to leave. Her mother, with a warm smile and a kiss on her forehead, reminded Ona that she was just a call away. After a few more hugs and goodbyes, they were gone and the apartment fell into a peaceful quiet.

Ona was exhausted, the day’s events catching up to her all at once. All she wanted to do was crawl into bed and sleep, but there was one last thing she had to do: taking Coco for a walk.

She grabbed his leash and headed outside. The night air was refreshing against her skin. The neighborhood was peaceful, with only the sound of distant traffic and an occasional passerby.

Suddenly, she heard someone call out, "Ona? Ona Batlle!?"

Assuming it was a fan, Ona turned around with a kind smile.

But her smile grew wider with surprise when she saw Lucy Bronze standing just a few steps away, a dog by her side.

"Ona! I didn’t expect to see you here," Lucy said, her face lighting up with recognition. "I mean, I knew we’d run into each other soon, but not like this."

"Lucy! What are you doing here?" Ona asked, still wrapping her head around the coincidence.

"I live here," Lucy replied with a playful chuckle, joking. "I play for Barça, remember?"

Ona laughed, the initial tension melting away. "ahh, ofcourse," she chuckled and pointed to the building she had just left. "wait, you mean in that building?"

"Yeah," Lucy confirmed with a warm smile, finally reaching her. "are we hugging?"

Ona smiled back ‘’ofcourse, we’re teammates now’’, nodding as she stepped into the embrace. "Nice to see you again" she said softly as they pulled back, "I wasn’t expecting to see a familiar face so soon."

"When did you get back here?" Lucy asked, knowing Ona had a history with Barcelona but also recalling their brief encounter in July, when Ona had come down to the club to officially sign her contract.

"Today, just a few hours ago. My parents picked me up from the airport and we had dinner together before they headed out, they just left actually."

"Oh, you must be exhausted," Lucy said, sympathy lacing her voice.

"Yeah, I’m sure I’ll crash as soon as I hit the bed, but Coco needed a walk first." Ona chuckled. The dog looking up as he heard his name.

"Am I keeping you? I can take another route?" Lucy offered.

"No, not at all," Ona shook her head, her smile widening. "I’m glad I ran into someone familiar before training next week. Even though I used to play for Barça and I know a few girls from nationals, it still feels like a new beginning, honestly I’m a bit nervous."

..

They chatted for a while, sharing stories about moving clubs, discussing their excitement for the season to start again and even the world cup made a brief appearance, but Lucy assured Ona that she didn’t hold a grudge about that, chuckling that England would beat them next time.

Both dogs seemed to get along well too, happily trotting beside each other as their owners talked. The conversation flowed easily, much like it had the last times they had met. It was comforting for Ona to find a familiar face in the new place, especially someone she admired so much and it helped a lot that Lucy was being so nice to her.

Ona couldn’t help the fact that she had considered that Lucy might not be warm towards her, given that they were both playing for the same position. Something which could come with a bit of rivalry within teams if players were both eager for a starting position. She didn’t get any of those vibes off of the English defender, but maybe that was yet to come, she hoped not.

As they said their goodbyes in the building’s lobby and headed back to their respective apartments, Ona couldn’t help but feel a spark of excitement. Not only was she living her dream, but she also had a friend and teammate just a few doors down, with who she had just exchanged phone numbers to carpool next week.

When Ona finally shut her apartment door, she still wore the smile on her face, she had had a good day. A perfect day.

She tucked Coco into his bed and as she crawled under her own blankets, she still couldn’t stop smiling. This new chapter in her life was already off to an incredible start.

…

The next week, on a bright august morning, Ona and Lucy set off together for the FC Barcelona training ground, the sun casting a golden glow over the city. During the drive they chatted and Ona tried to ease her worries about fitting in with both her new and the familiar teammates. Lucy, with her easygoing and kind nature, reassured Ona that it would be like coming home for her.

Upon arriving at the club, the day was a whirlwind of medical tests and introductions. Ona was welcomed back into the fold by familiar faces. She saw Aitana, her national camp roomie, as they were both having their bike test at the same time. She hugged her and Bonmatí said she was very excited to see Ona back and couldn’t wait to play with her again.

Alexia, Jana, Salma and also some players she didn’t yet know, like Keira, Caroline and Esmee, everyone was kind and even though the medical examinations were thorough and took up most of the morning, she had had a good time.

The few nerves that Ona had started the day with were long forgotten as her first day of work went by.

..

By the end of the day, Lucy and Ona drove back together, sharing their impressions of the day. Ona had barely seen her neighbor around at the club, but she hadn’t expected Lucy to stay around holding her hand either. And after all it hadn’t really been necessary , she knew most off the girls there maybe even better then Lucy so it would’ve been weird. But she did feel really comfy near Lucy and was definitely eager to become friends with her.

The long hours had been exhausting, but the mood in the car was great. They reflected on the promising start to the season, discussing training plans and their hopes for the future. The drive back was filled with laughter and mutual encouragement, reinforcing the feeling that this new chapter was going to be an exciting adventure. Already planning out all the trophies they would win, all of them ofcourse.

..

The week had gone better than Ona could’ve imagined. Joining a new team was always a mix of excitement and nerves, but Ona was settling in well. Her developing friendship with Lucy helped a big part in that. They quickly fell into a rhythm, driving together whenever their schedules matched up. It was comforting to have someone to talk to during the rides—Lucy’s calm and laid-back demeanor put Ona at ease. They even walked their dogs together, sometimes by chance when they bumped into each other outside, and other times when one of them texted to arrange it. Those small moments of connection gave a spark to Ona’s days.

The training sessions were intense, but Ona was also starting to find her place within the team. Over the course of the week, she had formed a tight-knit group with Salma, Vicky, Bruna, Jana, Patri, and Pina. It came naturally—they joked around, supported each other through drills and even helped each other out with little things like advice on new drills or finding the best spots for post-training snacks.

This Saturday morning’s session was typical pre-season work: sharp, focused and designed to get them all in peak condition. The mood was upbeat, everyone knowing they’d have the afternoon off once they were done. Lucy had texted Ona earlier, suggesting they grab lunch together after training and Ona had agreed, excited about spending more time with her new friend.

As they finished the session, the group drifted towards the locker room, still chatting animatedly. The conversation quickly turned to lunch plans, with Vicky and Salma leading the charge.

“There’s this rooftop restaurant in the city that has the best views,” Vicky said, her eyes lighting up. “You guys have to come. The food’s amazing.”

Salma nodded enthusiastically. “And the vibe is so chill. Especially on a day like this.”

Ona was about to say yes when she felt a gentle nudge at her side. She turned to see Lucy, who was freshly showered and ready to go. “Hey, chauffeur, ready to go?” Lucy asked with a teasing smile.

Ona smiled back, feeling a bit torn. “I’d love to go with you guys another time, but I’m carpooling with Lucy.”

Vicky wasn’t going to let her friend off the hook so easily. “Why don’t you join us after you drop Lucy off?” she suggested, not missing a beat.

Lucy, responded with a grin. “I was actually going to buy Ona lunch for driving me to training, but if you’d rather go with them, we can always reschedule.”

Vicky waved off the idea with a laugh. “Lucy, you can join too, you’re a cool old person.”

Salma chuckled, adding, “Yeah, sure Lucy can join.”

Lucy raised an eyebrow, pretending to be offended. “Old? I’m not old.” She huffed.

The whole group standing around bursted out in a chuckle.

Ona quickly jumped in, without having control she called out to defend the older player. “Lucy’s not old.”

With a smile, Lucy draped an arm around Ona’s shoulder. “See? I’m not old,” she said, pulling Ona a little closer. The gesture was casual, but it made Ona feel warm inside.

The rest of the group laughed, the teasing and banter making the decision easy. Vicky grinned. “Alright, so it’s settled. We’re all going.”

Lucy nodded, still smiling. “Sounds like a plan.”

As they all headed out of the locker room together walking to the parking lot. Ona turned to Lucy, ´´sure it´s allright?’’, ‘’I don’t want to bother you, we can go another time for lunch together?’’.

Lucy looked at Ona curiously, ‘’do you not want me there? It’s cool if you just want to with your friends, I just-‘’ she smiled awkwardly, ‘’thought it could be fun?’’.

Ona shook her head, ‘’no, no’’ she put her hand on Lucy’s lower arm, ‘’I would really like for you to come’’.

‘’Sure?’’ Lucy asked, ‘’you can just drop me off at home if-

‘’No’’ Ona shook her head, ‘’I just thought-‘’.

Salma and Vicky called out from Ona’s car ‘’Ey, can you open the car Ona?’’.

Ona looked up annoyed, ‘’why? what are you two doing?’’.

‘’Patri and Pina said we could drive with you’’ Vicky said proudly.

Ona internally groaned, she would’ve rather sat alone with Lucy, but she didn’t show her discontentment and just clicked open the car.

‘’I really like you joining the lunch’’ she quickly said to Lucy on more time before they made it to the car too.

…

The lunch was great, Ona couldn’t help but glance at Lucy every once in a while, especially when she laughed at one of her own jokes. She normally didn’t like people that did that, but with Lucy it was so cute, so innocent. She wanted to watch her laugh for hours.

Lucy had paid for the lunch of everyone, Ona hadn’t expected it, no one had. But she had been gone for a second and when they’d asked for the bill the waiter had told it had been paid. Then Lucy had confessed she’d already paid.

After dropping Salma off they were now at Vicky’s place. ‘’Thanks Ona, and thank you Lucy, you’re a G’’ Vicky said before closing the car door, ‘’see you next week’’.

‘’Bye Vicky’’, Lucy called out as Ona stayed silent.

She drove off again, now headed to their apartment block, about a twenty minute drive.

‘’You good?’’. Lucy said, turning the music down a little, ‘’you seem very far away in thoughts’’.

Ona blinked, ‘’uhm, oh, yeah, no’’.

Lucy chuckled, ‘’tired?’’.

‘’Yes,’’ Ona nodded, happy with the excuse easily offered to her, ‘’a bit tired’’.

‘’Ah, maybe a nap when you’re home then’’.

 ‘’Maybe, but I have to walk Coco first’’.

‘’Ah, Narla also has to go on a walk, maybe we can walk together?’’.

Ona smiled, but quickly put her face in neutral again, trying to stay casual. ‘’Mhm, okay.’’

‘’If you’re too tired it is fine too,’’ Lucy said, ‘’don’t feel pressured’’.

‘’No, no’’ Ona said, momentarily glancing over to face Lucy, ‘’I would like to walk together’’.

‘’Good, I like walking them together.’’

‘’Yeah me too, they seem to like eachother.’’ Ona said, a little blush creeping up her cheeks.

‘’Mhm.’’ Lucy chuckled, ‘’becoming besties like their moms’’.

...

Masterlist: Playing for keeps

[fandomxo00]

Ok but imagine:

You find X-24 and the children, bringing them to safety.

You had joined in on the mission later on, helping control x-24, you had been transferred after the incident with Laura. Who since your accident had been able to escape along with several other children. But tonight, you had done it, you had found the kids, stopped the Alkali minions. You didn't know much about X-24 when you were put on him, but you knew that he was completely brainwashed. You didn't have much time to get to know him, try to get to trust you. You knew that under Alkali's control that there was no way you could stop him. But if you could escape, ween him off of green serum that enhanced his abilities but made him easily manipulated. He trusted the people in the lab and with his inhibitions numbed. X-24 or you've deemed James didn't have control over himself, he had no confidence in making any decisions on his own. They whipped him into the perfect solider.

You started visited him when he was in his room, he was locked away when he wasn't on the serum. Usually verily locked down so no one but Dr. Rice and Pierce had access to him. You were well regarded here, from the beginning, you'd been going underground. All the side-tracks, all the little things that would go wrong were from you. It came from an overall plan to free the young mutant children and others who were controlled by Transigen. They would give him a simple command and he knew how to follow through. He had trigger words that while he was on the serum, had him easily bending to their will and become a killing machine.

It tore at you the way they treated him like a dog. James is severely abused and when you'd visit him. All you would do is offer him a Snickers bar and ask him if he wanted you to read. He always silently took the chocolate bar and whispered, "Yes". It was routine that you established with him. Then one day you slid a note in with the snickers bar, it was a simple joke. 'Why was the broom late for school? It over-swept.' You heard him huff out his nose, as you watched a small smile quirk as his mouth before falling. He could read. Then the next time you swept in a different one, "I'm working on getting you and others out of here." You heard a scoff before he crushed the paper in his hand before throwing it back through the bars.

"Don't care." His dark voice grumbled. You stared over at X-24, trying to fill in the gaps that they wouldn't tell you. You weren't exactly sure how he came to be but only he would know. But you were learning that he wasn't a robot or emotionless. He could react, feel and think for himself. The number of different medications and drugs they had him on numbed him to a point where he truly became brainwashed. Then you got in control of his medications, coming into his cell every morning. He noticed something changed, no one else could, it wasn't their business to know what he took. You knew that you'd gotten him on lower doses, planning to ween him off the substance. You knew the green serum would be nearly impossible to wean him off of while they still wanted to use him.

One day, he'd already been sat up in bed when you rolled around, a tired dazed look on his face as his eyes focused on you. You tried not to look into his eyes, they were very dark in nature but shown a mossy green. James' hand placed over wrist as you went to hand him his medication. His eyes gazed into yours as he dipped his chin in acknowledged, your smiled over at him before dropping the pills in his hand. Your other hand slipping a note into his hand resting as his side. He clasped his hand shoving the note into his pocket before swallowing back the pills as you moved to hand him the water.

He was very drugged up when Dr. Rice got ahold of him, pushing you to the side to take full control. Making him murder The Wolverine and though he was feral enough to kill all on his own accord, he wouldn't have done that. You watched as he hesitated, or slowly moved, he didn't want to do it. James had no autonomy over himself, and you planned on giving that back to him. So when he woke up in a farmhouse, with you trying to poke a needle into his arms, let's just say he was surprised. Throwing himself off the table and sweeping behind you, wrapping his arm around your neck. Your hand coming to his forearm, "James-it's me." You squeaked. "Please."

When he looked down at you, he instantly relaxed, "I'm sorry." He croaked, his hands coming to your shoulders as he groaned. Pain was written all over his face.

"You need to lay down, your coming off alot of drugs all at once."

"You saved me." James replied, as you stared over at him, heaving out a breath.

"That was the plan."

"But you got the kids out, I could've just died." You've never heard him speak this much, the rawness in his voice told you that he didn't talk much. Something you picked up from the beginning, you almost wondered if they controlled by a computer. But he some autonomy in his body and it had been easier because you started sooner. "You came back for me."

"You didn't deserve to be treated that way." You breathed, shrugging. Your hand coming to his shoulder to push him back on to the table. "They are getting a bed ready for you, but for now rest." James' hand came up to yours, holding on tightly as breathed heavily. There was a heavy weight in his hand settling on him as his temples began to pound.

"You're an angel." You blushed at his raw voice muttering the compliment, looking away feel slightly uncomfortable but he squeezed your hand before letting go. Your hand came to his chest, rubbing the firm muscle as his eyes fluttered shut. His eyes resting as his hand relaxed, you moved the blanket back over him, leaving him be for the time remaining.

tags: @ohtobemare @jessjessmarvelandhp @chronicallybubbly @delicateholland @bubblegumholland @mega-kittyglitter-1

[sharedramblings]

I think Larissa would be the biggest tease if she caught on that you're also attracted to her while you haven't yet realized that she knew, relishing on your every hitch breath, reddened cheeks, and flustered face.

So one time when she needs to check if she has to touch up, but doesn't feel like going to the comfort room, she turns to you who already has your trusty compact mirror in hand, already doing the same thing.

"Can I borrow that, darling?" She asked, blue eyes looking at your hand before meeting with yours.

"Here." You said, offering the mirror to her.

What you expected her to do was to take the mirror, but when Larissa instead adjusted your hand so she could see her reflection properly, your eyebrows shot up in silent query.

She paid you no mind and leaned closer, turning her face here and there to inspect her make up, humming to herself. The sudden closeness had your breath catching in your throat, and with such proximity, she heard it clearly, one corner of her lips curving upwards at your reaction.

Within the first few seconds, she already knew she doesn't need any touch up, but she continued checking a bit more just to mess with you, her soft and warm hands not letting yours go.

You simply watched her then, unable to think of what to do other than that. Appreciating how close she is, how you can feel her warmth, how her breath hits your skin every now and then. Eyes roaming her face, taking in every feature of hers, thinking just how unbelievably gorgeous the woman in front of you is. And how you would kiss her if you could. And how you would want her to kiss you, please. And how addicting this small space between you two is, dreaming this be your reality all the time.

So lost in thought that you didn't realize Larissa is staring at you. When your eyes meet, you can't help but feel like you were caught doing something you shouldn't, and the knowing glimmer in her eyes doesn't help your case at all.

"Do I still look presentable?" She asked, batting her eyes at you. Teasing smile on her red painted lips. Head tilted a bit to the right.

You blushed, her unrelenting actions causing an onslaught of emotions.

"Yes," you managed to meek out, voice higher than you wanted.

"And my lipstick? Do I need to reapply it?" Your eyes immediately flicked down to her lips, feeling your cheeks get hotter. You gulp as you feel your throat start to dry, and with your focus trained on her mouth that you've been desperately wanting to feel, you failed to notice how Larissa followed the action.

You felt like combusting, and you really hope she couldn't see how flushed this is all making you feel (you knew she could, it's impossible with the little distance you two have). Her hand was still cupping the back of yours, and you have no idea if it's grounding you or adding fuel to the fire.

"No," you answered after what felt like a long time, the tension distorting your sense of time, "your lips look lovely."

You wet your lips as you realize what you said, adding the first thing you thought of as you panic. "I meant..." taking a deep breath to stabilize your trembling voice, you look her in the eye again, "...you know, the coverage is amazing, as always."

You cringed at yourself, but the low chuckle Larissa let out made up for it (almost).

"Of course," she stated.

Not trusting yourself to take anymore of this any longer, you move to keep the mirror inside your bag, the bustle on the cafe coming back to your senses.

"Shall we head out?" Larissa offered, softly taking you in one more time.

You nod and regard her with a sheepish smile she finds adorable, "Work's calling us back."

As you two walk towards her car, your hand can't help but seek her warmth, taking every chance you could to touch her even just for a few seconds under the guise of poorly believable excuses, ready to slip off your tongue to justify it to anyone who dares point it out. While she waits for you to officially make a move, Larissa would enjoy every bit of this in the meantime.

[kcthelazyartist]

Something of note is the ‘MCGUCKET’ code on thisisnotawebsite.com and how the song  further confirms that Fiddleford is the reason for Bill not getting Ford in the end. This could either be just plot related [As Fidds leads to his downfall] but is more likely in a romantic sense as it references the singer not being married due to the other. 

This could be just making fun of Fidds or be from Fidds’ perspective, but as Fidds won in the end and Bill lost Ford this is unlikely. Instead, it's likely Bill showing his frustration at Fidds getting in between him and Ford.

This could also imply two things, Fidds being too wary and perspective got in the way of everything, or Ford had feelings for Fidds instead of Bill.

In regards to Ford changing the story from ‘A Tale of Two Stans’ to ‘The Last Mabelcorn,’ when Ford was pushed through the portal queer people were about 4-6 years away from being legalised and it was very looked down upon. Of course when he first arrives home he is unaware of the current state of queer politics and is going to assume it will be the same as when he left. 

This could be an explanation as to why he changed the position to something less intimate. Alongside the wording used around him saying he’s glad he's friends with F with the ‘…’ before explaining that Fidds would be terrifying as an enemy, as well as Bill constantly mentioning ‘the hillbilly’ and putting him above Ford’s own father, his feelings towards Fiddleford are very suspicious.

Another suspicious thing on his end is that he writes literal pages about gifts he is given by Fiddleford and Bill at one point [The squash, the gloves and snowglobe, the axolotl…]

@hugenthusiast recently made a post discussing the line, ‘Go back to your doting family and a life of fear and compromise,’ and the queer undertones and comphet feel around the phrase. I would like to expand on this idea and how queer the context actually is.

Starting off with the line directly after, “I weep not for our failed partnership, but for the golden opportunity thrown away! To think I considered him a friend! I know my true friend. It is my Muse.’ This line adds more context that makes the line they pointed at that much more queer, Ford telling Fidds to go back to his family then saying he isnt crying over their partnership but something else makes it sound like a breakup. Ford then compares his friendship to Bill’s, whom he has a queer relationship with.

Combining this with the full page rant and how he was willing to tell Fiddleford about his muse even after years of manipulation and it just feels like a breakup. Ford throwing away the ring also adds to this as it mimics people throwing away things related to their ex and another thing that mimics a breakup is Ford calling Fidds names.

Now going back to the line @hugenthusiast points out, whilst fear and compromise in this context is supposed to be about the portal it is a bit of a double-sided phrase as compromise can mean making do with less than ideal circumstances and being married to someone you have no interest in absolutely fits that, and the fear of outing was very real during this period of time.

‘Doting family’ is also interesting as mixed with the second half of that line it seems as though taking away the fear and compromise would alter his relationship with his family, whom later turn their backs on him, showing how rocky their relationship is and his family's bias’ as they don't even try to help him. I feel like this mixed with how he chooses not to go back really says something, ford calls his family doting yet he doesn't return to them?

[captain-hawks]

SOMEDAY WAS ALWAYS JUST RIGHT HERE.

hajime iwaizumi x f!reader

wc: 3.4k tags: 18+ only, friends to lovers, pining, feels, smut, grinding, fingering, unprotected p in v, praise kink, protective iwa -> requested

“I hate this place,” Iwaizumi grumbles when your group slows to a stop on the sidewalk, the neon purple sign above the entrance of the club washing his face in a vivid hue that only serves to further highlight his displeasure.

“Well, Iwa-chan,” Oikawa elbows him in the ribs, “when it’s your birthday, we’ll all stand in a room looking annoyed with our arms crossed watching paint dry or something.” 

He pats him on the shoulder before striding ahead, following Makki and Mattsun inside. 

It’s been almost six months since the five of you have all gotten together, thanks to the demands of full-time jobs in different cities. 

You missed this. 

You missed them. 

Iwaizumi turns to you, like you’ll be his saving grace with some off-the-cuff excuse to get the hell out of Dodge before the other three notice you’re gone. 

(But you missed him the most, this you know for certain.)

“Oh no,” you tell him. “I spent too much time getting ready to bail now.”

(Though the idea of fucking off with Iwa to some dimly-lit diner with sticky, decades-old menus and watered down soda like you used to when you were teenagers is wholly tempting—)

He sighs but follows you in all the same, albeit the slightly begrudging drag of his feet as he mutters, “I feel like I should have started drinking before we got here.”

Truth be told, if it wasn’t Makki’s birthday, you also wouldn’t really want to spend your only night in town here of all places. But without much of a choice in the matter, and with Oikawa’s none-too-subtle encouragement regarding a certain something last week, you’ve decided to make the most of it—although you’re still not going to get your hopes up. 

—

Oikawa: sooo Oikawa: you said you were going shopping today for something to wear this weekend Oikawa: did you find anything

>>>: [image sent] >>>: Pick a color. I’ve been to ten stores. I’m over it.

Oikawa: well i’m partial to blue  Oikawa: but iwa-chan will loooove the black dress ;)

>>>: TOORU

Oikawa: :)

>>>: You swore yourself to secrecy >>>: Please don’t say anything

Oikawa: i’m just saying Oikawa: maybe show him what he’s been missing out on~ Oikawa: absence makes the dick grow harder!

>>>: I’m blocking your number

—

You’ve been friends with the boys since your days at Aoba Johsai, and you’ve maintained an impressively solid track record at keeping your feelings for Iwaizumi buried under lock and key for just as long. 

That is—until you made the horrid mistake of drunkenly bemoaning your unrequited pining to Oikawa last time you saw them all for a reunion party at Mattsun’s place. A party which happened to include Iwaizumi’s on-again off-again girlfriend. 

(They’re now very much off, permanently. As of the last two months, intel courtesy of the nosey brunette who has now decided to make your mockery of a love life his latest charity case.)

Now, Oikawa falls into step beside you, Iwaizumi shooting him a suspicious glance before he shoos him off toward where Makki and Mattsun are already leaning over the bartop to order drinks. 

“I told you black was the way to go,” Oikawa murmurs under his breath in a singsong voice, appraising your outfit with a satisfied smirk. 

“And I still don’t think dressing nice is suddenly going to make him decide he’s in love with me,” you whisper back in annoyance.

“First of all, he’s been in love with you since high school. Second, he hasn’t stopped looking at you since we picked you up.”

You blink at him several times, chest swelling with warmth and dumbfounded confusion, but any chance of a retort dies on your lips when Iwaizumi returns to your side. 

“You said you didn’t wanna drink tonight, right?” he asks, holding up a glass of what appears to be soda. 

He’s always had a habit of listening to you. 

Oikawa looks infuriatingly smug when he throws a glance back at you from behind him, wiggling his eyebrows for emphasis. 

“Thanks,” you smile, fingertips incidentally brushing against his when he hands you the cup.

He nods, something soft flickering across his face for a brief moment, though it disappears when Oikawa starts shouting your names from afar like a scorned lover. 

You try not to overthink the way his hand gently hovers against your lower back when the two of you make your way through the throng of people to find the table your friends have claimed, or the way his thigh briefly presses up against yours when you slide into the booth.

–

“This feels counterproductive,” you yell over the music to Oikawa as he drags you out onto the dance floor twenty minutes later, a few paces behind a very loud and equally inebriated Makki. Mattsun’s off getting more drinks. “Iwa will die before he comes over here.”

Oikawa’s hands hover over your hips, though there’s nothing suggestive about the touch as he casually urges you to follow the rhythm he’s already moving to. “You really have no idea, do you?”

You huff in annoyance, letting your limbs loosen up as you sway. “He’s not into me, Tooru. I don’t know what you think you’ve been seeing, but you’re wrong.”

He looks like he wants to argue, but Makki sidles up beside you with a flushed face and a pair of heart-shaped sunglasses on his head that he definitely didn’t walk in with, hands grabbing both of your arms as he pulls you deeper into the crowd. 

A tall man eventually edges his way between where you’re dancing beside Oikawa, an uninvited hand falling against your hip as he leans into your space and says loud enough for you to hear over the music, “That dress looks gorgeous on you, but it would look even better on the floor.”

You blink at him, body cringing with discomfort at the sleazy look on his face and the way his hand has begun to slip lower toward your backside. While you’re not opposed to dancing with strangers to get your mind off of the man who’s probably still sullenly scrolling through his phone at the table, something about this guy’s presumptuous touch sends you reeling with discomfort. 

Intending to catch Oikawa or Makki’s attention, you quickly turn, only to bump right into Iwaizumi.

His jaw is firmly set, eyes brimming with something dark as he pulls you against him, and the knot of anxiety in your chest immediately loosens at the feeling of his body heat sinking into yours.

“You good?” he asks quietly.

You nod, unconsciously pressing even closer to him, and he tightens the arm that’s wrapped around you a fraction. 

“What the hell, man?” The guy glares at Iwaizumi, like he’s ruined his chances with you. 

“You wanna dance with this guy?” The question is a warm huff of air against the shell of your ear. 

“Absolutely not,” you tell him, eyeing the creep warily.

“She’s not interested, man,” Iwaizumi replies. 

“What, you her boyfriend or something?” The guy sneers, clearly attempting to save face now. “Wouldn’t have known any better with all the guys she’s over here dancing with.”

Iwaizumi shifts forward, fist clenched. “What the fu—“

“Oooookay, time to fuck off now!” Oikawa interrupts, smoothly stepping in between the two men. 

The man looks like he wants to argue more, but Matsukawa moves to stand next to Oikawa, arms crossed, and it quickly becomes a moot point as he sulks off in defeat. 

Iwaizumi lets you go, though his shoulder remains pressed against yours. 

“Iwa-chan, how nice of you to join us,” Oikawa coos, ruffling his hair for good measure. 

Iwaizumi slaps his hand away, glaring. “Well since none of you know how to spot creeps before they become a problem.”

Oikawa offers him a patronizing smile, “We’re not all equipped to be the definition of scary dog privilege like you are.”

Pinching the bridge of his nose, Iwaizumi grumbles something under his breath before putting his arm around your shoulder and steering you away from the other three. 

“Thanks, Hajime, but I do still want to dan—“

“I know,” he replies, coming to a stop and turning you to face him. 

“So what are you—”

Your words die a spectacular death at the shallow bridge between your tongue and your teeth as Iwaizumi lifts your arms and places them around his neck, moving his own hands to your waist. 

And this time, when the vivid overhead lights wash over him, his expression is soft. 

“We’re dancing,” he says, like it’s the most obvious thing in the world. 

Like his fingers aren’t a burning hot brand against the curve of your hips. 

“You hate dancing,” you reply dumbly. 

The corner of Iwaizumi’s mouth tilts upward a little. “Yeah, I do.”

The crowd around you moves with vigor, laughing and grinding and shouting over the thrumming, pulsing music. But Iwaizumi’s hand just gently slides to your wrist, and he slowly guides you outward into a full-body spin, his eyes sweeping down your form. 

When you find yourself back in your original position, albeit a bit closer than before, he adds, “But I can be convinced.”

Your heart swells. 

You’ve always been attracted to Iwaizumi, endlessly fond of his dark, messy brown hair and perpetual scowl. But the years have been more than kind to him, his boyish teenage features of days long past now cut into something solid and achingly handsome in a way that leaves your gut churning with heat every time you look at him. He’s taller, and broader—though you try not to let yourself dwell on the second point much for the sake of your own sanity. 

And now he’s looking at you expectantly with his stupidly attractive face, a challenge flashing in his eyes as he waits for you to move. 

So you do. 

For a partner that claims to hate this, Iwaizumi doesn’t miss a beat when you start to move, falling into sync with the rhythm of your body. And all you can think is how the way he holds you, the steady pressure of his hands on your waist—it’s nothing like how it was with Oikawa. 

It’s borderline possessive.

Almost.

It’s a battle in and of itself to resist the urge to let your hand slide to the nape of his neck, to card your fingers through the soft, shorter hair at the back of his head. 

Your insides feel raw, flammable. 

Doused in years worth of longing and desire that have soaked you to the bone, left you shivering with want, pliant and porous with need.

And the audible hitch in Iwaizumi’s breath as you spin and place your back to his front is the match. 

The space between your bodies closes as you lean back into him, as he pulls you in. The aftershocks of his touch spiderweb across your nervous system without mercy. 

You press back into him, harder. The beat of the music overheard is lost to you, drowned out by the blood that rushes in your ears as his grip on you tightens.

“You gonna move?” he teases, voice a little rough. “‘Cause I still don’t know what the hell I’m doing.”

Your legs bend at the knee as you drop your body down just enough, ass brushing his thighs, before rolling back up against him. His fingers flex, and he curses hoarsely under his breath.

So you do it again.

Iwaizumi’s mouth is hot when it lands just behind your earlobe, less of a kiss and more of a labored exhale. You shudder at the sensation all the same, and he turns just enough to drag his nose down the side of your neck.

“Hajime,” you gasp.

He lets out a sound that sounds like a broken off laugh, low and abrupt and a little incredulous.

Turning your head, your lips nearly meet, the layer of saliva coating yours prickling against the warmth of his breath that breaches the gap. 

Iwaizumi, as it turns out, is a quick study.

He drags your hips in a rolling motion, rocking forward into you, mouth finding purchase where your neck and shoulder meet. And he does kiss you this time, a hot, slick brand against your skin, your neck, one that sinks in deeper as you breathe out his name again with need punctuating each syllable. 

You’re dizzy on your feet.

And he’s ridiculously hard against you.

Giving in to an urge that spans years beyond this moment, you reach back, dragging your fingers through his hair from the front. You can feel the way he shudders against you. 

“I think I’m done dancing,” you breathe out. 

He doesn’t misunderstand your meaning.

You text Oikawa to let him know you’re heading out, both to save time and to avoid being on the receiving end of what you can only assume will be his most smug look yet.

The taxi ride back to Iwaizumi’s apartment is quiet, but his pinky rests against yours in the middle of the leather backseat. 

He helps you out of your heels as you step through the doorway, his fingers lingering against your ankles as he slips open the buckles.

And you’re sixteen again, biting the inside of your cheek as Iwaizumi kneels in front of you at the run-down local roller rink and tightens the laces on your skates.

He gets you a cold glass of water.

You’re nineteen again, hiccuping and sobbing at two o’clock in the morning on the ugly orange couch at Oikawa and Iwaizumi’s place as the latter mumbles choice words about your ex-boyfriend under his breath. He grabs your wrist to steady the cup of water you’ve nearly spilled twice.

He leads you into his bedroom.

You’re twenty four and you’re hundreds of miles away in a one-bedroom apartment that still doesn’t feel like home. And Iwaizumi’s rolling his eyes fondly on the other side of the phone screen as he takes you for a tour of his new place, making a dramatic grand gesture to show you exactly where he put the omamori you’d sent him via post—on his nightstand beside the bed. 

It’s still there now, nestled beside a pair of reading glasses and tube of chapstick.

And when he settles down on the edge of the bed and looks at you with his palms flat on either side of him and face tilted with a smile—

—your face feels hot, and you choke out a sob that feels equal parts pathetic and cathartic as you stand there before him.

Iwaizumi pulls you into his arms, and his voice is strained as he says, “I didn’t want to hold you back.”

It suddenly makes sense now, the subtle, distant change in him after you received your scholarship letter what feels like a lifetime ago.

“And if I said I want to stay this time?”

You hate your job. 

Your lease is nearly up.

He cups your face in both of his hands, his low, rough tone betraying his steady gaze. “Do you?”

You smile, and his thumb strokes away the next tear that trails down your cheek.

“I missed you,” you whisper.

The shape of his lips mirrors your own. “I miss you all the time.”

And when his mouth finally finds yours, when he cups the back of your head and parts the seam of your lips with his tongue while you straddle his lap, as you both go tumbling backward against the mattress—this feels like home. 

–

“Is it too late for me to tell you how good you looked in this tonight?” Iwaizumi says from where he’s lying beneath you as you tug off your dress, his hands finding a home against your bare sides.

You shiver at the sensation, tossing the black material to join his shirt and pants on the floor. 

He watches it fall. “...I guess it does look better there tho—”

“Don’t you dare.”

He grins, surging up to kiss you, hands deftly flicking open the hinge of your bra as his mouth slots against yours. You nip at his bottom lip, taking it between your teeth, and he groans, drawing an equally needy whine out of you as he cups your bare breast and drags his thumb over your pebbled nipple. 

A little embarrassed by the desperation in your tone, you inhale sharply, and he presses an open mouthed kiss to the corner of your lips as he rasps, “No, I wanna hear you.”

He dips his head down, mouth closing over one of your nipples, and your body arches into his as pleasure dances down your spine. You moan.

“Good girl,” he murmurs, dragging his mouth from your sternum to your collarbone before hotly kissing his way up the side of your neck.

You’re helpless to stop the whimper that leaves you at his whispered praise, and he knows it—you feel him smile against the curve of your jaw. 

When he slides off your underwear, and as you hook a finger in his boxers in turn, you nearly expect him to crawl forward, to lay you flat on your back. But he pulls you back into his lap instead, groaning softly over how wet you are as he slides two fingers through your slick, dripping folds. 

It’s so intimate—rocking back down onto the length of his fingers as he stretches you open, as his chest rises and falls while he watches you tremble. He kisses you hard, the sounds of your moans echoing in the back of his throat as his tongue scrapes against your teeth, fingers slipping and plunging against your plush inner walls. 

And for all that he’s rendered you hopelessly drunk on his touch, he’s equally as affected, his forehead dropping against your shoulder when you finally wrap your hands around his shaft. Iwaizumi lets out a shuddering breath, taking your skin between his teeth.  There’s a breathless conversation that passes between the two of you, his eyes briefly darting toward his nightstand in question, but the matter is settled on other terms.

Iwaizumi’s eyes burn into yours as he grasps your hips and eases you down onto his thick cock, fingers digging in when you keen at the stretch. Your cunt spasms, slick walls eagerly taking each inch until he’s bottomed out inside of you, his mouth pressed to yours as he rasps again, even softer this time, “Good girl.”

You find yourself worried for a moment that in this position, your trembling legs won’t find purchase in this molten sea of pleasure, but the firm pressure of Iwaizumi’s hands on your hips is a stark reminder of how very observant he is. He guides your body upward, enough that the head of his cock rubs against your aching entrance, and then rolls his hips as he drags you back down. 

“Hajime,” you whimper, rocking your throbbing clit against him once he’s buried to the hilt.

“Keep saying my name like that, and I’m not gonna last,” he groans, voice like gravel, cock now thrusting in and out of you repeatedly. 

Reaching up, you card your fingers through his hair and pull, bringing your mouth to his as you exhale against his lips, “Hajime.”

He cups the back of your head, licking his way into your mouth and deepening the kiss before reaching down to drag his thumb over your swollen clit. The coil in your abdomen trembles with the need for release as you feel yourself start to go up in flames faster than you ever could have anticipated.

“Let me hear you come,” he breathes out, eyes locked on yours.

The pleasure cresting inside of you explodes.

You cry out, every muscle in your body going taut as your climax stretches you open wide. And Iwaizumi kisses you hard, fucking you through it until you’re whimpering from overstimulation. He pulls out of you, the base of his cock rubbing against your sensitive clit and soaking wet folds as he rapidly strokes himself, gasping when you replace his hand with your own. Hot ropes of cum splatter between your bodies as his hips jerk upward into your touch, his mouth halfway slotted against yours as he breathes hard and fast. 

You don’t bother going back to your hotel that night.

(You’ll take the afternoon train back.)

–

Months later, home is tangled up in these sheets that smell like his body wash and your shampoo.

It’s quiet mornings on the couch and laughter in the kitchen.

It’s slow dancing in the living room and kissing under the string lights on the tiny balcony. 

Home is here, with Hajime, the reassuring warmth of his fingers threaded into yours.

[rosettyller]

i can't stop thinking about this conversation it's insane. that "i-it was - ".

[crushribbons]

Totally adore your work. Birdie was too good. I have to request anything jealous, pining seb in your style 🥹 pretty, pretty pls, gah

omg please don't enable me like thiiiisss (always enable me like this ily xx) NSFW (18+ onlyyyy)

--

"Prewett. Who is that witch over there, at the Minister's table?"

Prewett turned his head over his shoulder. "The one on his left?"

"Don't look right at her," Sebastian grumbled, reaching across the expanse of white linen between Leander and him and pulling his co-worker back to face him by the jacket. The witch glanced up and caught sight of the commotion at the table in front of hers. Her brow furrowed. "Fuck, she's beautiful."

A middle-aged witch seated to his right gave a disapproving "tsk!" and Sebastian rolled his eyes. He couldn't countenance the Ministry holding these infernal luncheons in the poshest London restaurants at all, let alone being forced to attend them and sit amongst people he avoided like the plague in the hallways. His stiff collar, that Anne had insisted on starching for the occasion, dug into the bottom of his chin. Prewett suppressed a chuckle at Sebastian's rudeness.

"That's his daughter, Sallow, didn't you know? There's a fun Sunday evening dinner for you." A shudder passed through Sebastian at the thought of making niceties with the oaf he technically worked for, as the Minister rarely deigned to dirty his fingernails down in the R.C.M.C. and thought its employees less-deserving of Ministry resources than the stiff-necked desk jockies of other departments. But for her...For her, he thought, he could choke down a dry pot roast and smile whenever he needed to. She had resumed her conversation with the woman across from her, and her laughter was sweeter than the perfumed air wafting through the restaurant.

Images of what he'd like to do to her, preferably on top of her father's ostentatious desk, flashed through his mind and he smirked despite himself. He could almost hear her moans, greedy, and feel her claw into his neck. The impropriety of his thoughts sent a guilty flush through him when he stared at the picture-perfect socialite with a smile on her face and a...

Goddamned diamond on her finger.

When she lifted her left hand to fan herself after a particularly joyous peal of laughter, Sebastian's knuckles whitened around his knife. That jealous streak, that'll be the death of you one day, his sister's voice echoed in his head. Pain shot up his temple as he ground his teeth together. She was spoken for? Taken from him as soon as he'd found her?

The man on the other side of her then put his arm around the back of her chair and leaned too close to her, sullying her with his proximity, and whispered something in her ear that made her giggle behind the hand that covered her mouth. The diamond sparkled when the sunlight hit it. Sebastian wasn't listening to a word that Prewett prattled at him. She should be blushing pink like that for him, for him alone, crying out his name as he brought her to the brink of tears as many times as he could with just his tongue.

That should be his diamond on her finger, his thumb running across the back of her hand, his mouth planting deliberate pecks of affection across her cherubic cheeks. He imagined asking her to be his while he fucked her, and she responded with much more enthusiasm than the demure ascent she'd no doubt given to the sap draped over her: Yes, yes, yes!

Her eyes fell on him, and he straightened immediately. He wanted her to find him acceptable, attractive, anything for her to toss a careless smile in his direction. She lingered, just for a moment, regarding him over the top of her glass. Sebastian couldn't have pulled himself away from her gaze if he had tried.

It was probably his imagination; it was growing more and more treacherous by the second, but he could have sworn that he saw her glance to either side to ensure no one was looking then mouth to him,

"Cloakroom. Now."

The words "Excuse me" weren't even out of Sebastian's mouth before he had risen to his feet with a clatter of silver and porcelain and begun making his way towards the mercifully unattended cloakroom.

[aloeveratarot]

what is your feminine archetype?

pick a card reading ᡣ𐭩

note: this is just a short general reading so if anything does not seem to resonate please simply let it go. feedback and requests are very welcome.

extended reading is on my patreon ᡣ𐭩

pile 1:

page of cups, mother, prostitute, goddess of the moon

to whoever picked this pile, your feminine energy is quite prominent and versatile ~ you suit multiple archetypes simply because you are very feminine! the first archetype is the mother ~ you may have very strong maternal instincts and a highly developed intuition. you have a great capacity to love unconditionally and nurture others. you may be quite in tune with your emotions and sensitive to the emotions of others. your femininity gives major princess vibes ~ sweet, curious, alluring and a tad bit mysterious. there's also another energy that i'm picking up on, which is hard to explain ~ it's giving sugar baby vibes, like you'd easily get paid just for your companionship honestly (O-O｡) ~ and you probably are physically beautiful as the cherry on top. you can be a home away from home for some people. you may easily attract people who find deep comfort in you. other people tend to feel safe and relaxed in your presence.

pile 2:

king of wands, damsel, angel, first chakra

your feminine archetype is angelic ~ you give off a soft, ethereal and possibly even a coquette vibe, you seem to have an otherworldly energy. you may also have this deer-like, bambi vibe of innocence and gentleness. although this may give the wrong impression of a helpless damsel due to the softly hyper feminine energy. you may capture the attention of men a lot because of this too ~ inspiring the masculine to provide for you, especially with regard to stability, security, protection and passion. however, you are capable of your own independence too ~ i think that this feminine archetype inherently invokes this damsel in distress narrative in romantic settings!

pile 3:

queen of cups, servant, don juan, the sun

your femininity is best described as delightful and pleasing ~ not to say you're a people pleaser but you seem to embody the most positive expressions of femininity and are a shining example of it too. you may be quite traditional and are highly developed emotionally ~ compassion, caring, sensitive and nurturing. i also get the sense that their is a cuteness and light-heartedness about you that others may adore ~ i can best describe this as aegyo. on another note, as your femininity is in a way all encompassing, it tends to naturally bring to light and inspires intense s*xual interest ~ in a way that is for the enjoyment, fun and leisure of romantic union. i apologise that i could not quite allocate a specific archetype but i hope that made sense ♡

[paper-mario-wiki]

I feel like I've ended up in the same spot as so transmasc before me: I have a lovely cis boyfriend who loves my tits which I love for him, but I am getting dysphoric to the point I wanna lift my lips and show a lil teeth when I see his hands coming towards them. Feels bad because they are his favorite and we haven't been fucking as much because as soon as he starts touching me I am out of it™ and get all in my head and freeze up. Any advice?

good god, brother. i am utterly baffled at why you have elected me as the strategist for this problem, and i'm even more confused as to why you have chosen to go into as much detail as you have.

but.

if i were to give you some advice on this

i'd say that you should consider a conversation with your partner about the long-term plan for the relationship. a "relationship" is two lives that are connected, right? and your life is not one where you're gonna have boobs for the rest of it (or at least based on what you've told me i would assume, should you have your way, those bad boys are gettin lopped off at some point), therefore it's pertinent that it be brought up, because it concerns your life, therefore it concerns the relationship, therefore it concerns him, yes?

now, the first and most obvious thing to start with out the gate is the boundary, made clear and concise: the hills are now closed, off limits to tourists. all discussions regarding this come next. make it clear that it's about something quite core to your identity, and something that does in fact cause physical pain (a panic response from the nervous system is pain homie).

this brings some followup questions (and remember, this isn't an interrogation, it's a dialogue to share): how does he feel about this? if he's against, why? for that matter, how much does it bother him? is there something he doesn't understand about your discomfort? is there some concern he has about your financial or bodily well-being with regards to the procedure? is it because it's vital to his attraction to you as a partner? if that's the case, would their removal be a deal-breaker?

now keep in mind, these question can be brought up whether or not you've got immediate plans to engage in the aforementioned lopping-off of your aforementioned Bad Boys, because the actual point of this dialectical exercise is to create a simple, easy to navigate, easy to understand conversation, which will set a foundation for further negotiations-- should you learn something new about each other, or yourselves, or the relationship as a whole.

either way, i do not think that letting it keep happening and keeping it to yourself is a good idea. i can understand feeling guilty about withholding some physical and emotional gratification you could give "easily" to this person you care dearly for, but trust me when i say that it's not the way to let it be. not just because it's unfair to your partner to secretly grow to resent them for a reason you don't want to vocalize, but to yourself as well.

you may not know it, but by keeping it to yourself you're slowly building up a resentment. that frustration actually shows up pretty clearly in your message. and even if what you're frustrated about is only that particular activity, that activity is irrevocably tied to another person. specifically, a person that you consider to be a pretty central pillar in your life. if that resentment grows, it can evolve into anger, hatred, fear, paranoia, and all sorts of nasty things. and even aside from the emotional and psychological damage that can do, it can grow into a physiological issue, where your brain wears out more and more due to the growing emotional distress ripping through your neurons with all sorts of "emergency" chemicals. like i said, the panic response is a physical pain, even if your body doesn't feel like it "hurts".

so. to summarize.

ABSOLUTELY bring it up. if you don't, it could become damaging to your relationship, and also your actual real life physical brain.

when you do bring it up, remember that the goals are to set a boundary, and to reach an understanding through mutual conversation. it's a dialogue, not a lecture.

when you reach an understanding, figure out if the relationship needs to be renegotiated in some way. that usually means new boundaries, or expectations. or maybe nothing! though surely your boyfriend can find more things to love about you.

that's as best as i can muster. you don't have to follow it, but hopefully it'll at least give you some ideas you can use.

[hollowed-theory-hall]

ok since we’re discussing harry’s appearance and you’ve already clarified what you think he looks like from the neck down, now i’m wondering about his face. obviously, the books provide quite a generous description of him — green eyes, black, messy hair, etc — but i’m more curious about whether you envision him as having delicate features? is his face longer and more masculine or a bit more rounded and doll-like? would he be described as being attractive? handsome? beautiful?

since he’s a carbon copy of james, i’d assume that he genuinely is an attractive boy/man, but since we, as readers, see things so much more from his obviously subjective perspective, we also can’t get a very good feel of these things because harry himself isn’t interested in them. and, well, he is quite oblivious to other’s attentions in general.

i’m just curious what your perception of him is from canon, since i’ve seen so so many variations of his character in fanfictions.

Hi 👋,

(Anon is referring to this post regarding Harry's height and physique)

So, we actually have a ton of little details about Harry's facial features in the books. And, contrary to what many characters say, he isn't really a carbon copy of James, especially if he removes his glasses because some of his prominent facial features are described to be Lily's.

Harry is a kid who has his father’s hair, height, and glasses, so when people look at him from afar he looks like his dad. But if you look at him closely, or he removes his glasses, their faces share similarities, sure, but they are nowhere near as similar as you thought they were a moment ago when he had his glasses on. Like, that's how I see it, and the books support this:

It was as though he was looking at himself but with deliberate mistakes.

(OotP)

Harry is one of these kids who's a pretty equal mix of both their parents in his face. So, if he stood next to James, anyone looking would say they look really similar. If he stood next to Lily, they'd say he looked really similar to her (especially without his glasses).

Harry is mentioned to have his mother’s eyes, not just in color, but also in shape:

it was one of the girls from the lake edge. She had thick, dark red hair that fell to her shoulders and startlingly green almond-shaped eyes — Harry’s eyes.

(OotP)

So, Harry has green almond-shaped eyes like Lily. Almond-shaped eyes look something like this, apparently:

We also have details regarding Harry's nose. Since his nose is more similar to Lily's than James', at least, I think so:

his [James] nose was slightly longer than Harry’s

(OotP)

I imagine Harry to have a more button-shaped nose since it's what I imagine for Lily (James has a straighter nose in my mind). I don't have any quotes for the nose shape though, so it's just my headcanon.

What is canon is that Harry's nose is smaller than James' and Ron's.

As for other features of his face:

but they had the same thin face, same mouth, same eyebrows. James’s hair stuck up at the back exactly as Harry’s did, his hands could have been Harry’s

(OotP)

And Harry is consistently described with a thin face:

Harry had a thin face, knobbly knees, black hair, and bright green eyes

(PS)

So, from these two quotes, we can compose the rest of Harry's face shape (sorta). So Harry has a thin face, thin faces usually look more elongated. I assume his jaw is sharper than Lily's since he takes after James there.

We know his mouth and eyebrows are shaped like James', but I couldn't locate other quotes that were more specific, I take it to state his lips are on the thinner side, and his eyebrows are more masculine in shape since it's what I assume about James' appearance.

Now, I know some of the fandom headcanons Harry as not white, but I personally don't think it's the case in the books. JKR mentions very clearly when a character isn't white, with the expectation that any character that isn't given an ethnicity would be assumed white. It's how she writes, and you can say what you will about that, but it's not what I'm talking about. Additionally, contrary to popular belief, Harry's skin color is mentioned in the books to be white and pale (so is Hermione's actually).

I found a few quotes that outright mention Harry being pale, and therefore, white (this isn't an exhaustive list):

“Harry, dear, are you sure you’re all right?” said Mrs. Weasley in a worried voice, as they walked around the unkempt patch of grass in the middle of Grimmauld Place. “You look ever so pale... Are you sure you slept this morning? You go upstairs to bed right now, and you can have a couple of hours’ sleep before dinner, all right?”

(OotP)

“Are — are you sure you’re okay, Harry? You’re still very pale...”

(OotP)

Their eyes met over the basin, each pale face lit with that strange, green light. Harry did not speak. Was this why he had been invited along — so that he could force-feed Dumbledore a potion that might cause him unendurable pain? “You remember,” said Dumbledore, “the condition on which I brought you with me?”

(HBP)

Both Harry and Dumbledore are mentioned to be pale-skinned.

The word "pale" is used by JKR to describe skin quite often, and even when someone is "pale" when they are scared or stressed, it's because their skin is pale. I haven't seen her use the word for any of the dark-skinned characters (Like Dean Thomas, who was shown to be scared on occasion, but never described as "pale"). Besides being described as "pale", Harry's face is described as white on occasion as well:

Harry had gone very white. As soon as he found his voice he said, “Blown up? You told me they died in a car crash!”

(PS)

Breathing very fast, he turned slowly back to the mirror. There he was, reflected in it, white and scared-looking

(PS)

And considering Tom, who is repeatedly described as very pale and white, says:

We even look something alike ...

(CoS)

It's clear Harry looks very English, and therefore, very white. I'd go further and say he's likely quite pale considering how often he is mentioned to be pale + his resemblance to Tom. You can obviously headcanon whatever you want, I'm not stopping you, I'm just saying what the canon is.

I'd note that in general, Harry is pretty handsome and good-looking. In books 5 and 6, he's mentioned to be of interest to many girls, among them the good-looking and popular ones (even if he doesn't realize they are good-looking). Being the Boy Who Lived, rich, and famous gets some of this attention too, yes, but Hermione tells him the fact he is hot helps. Which it does:

“Oh, come on, Harry,” said Hermione, suddenly impatient. “It’s not Quidditch that’s popular, it’s you! You’ve never been more interesting, and frankly, you’ve never been more fanciable.” [...] “And it doesn’t hurt that you’ve grown about a foot over the summer either,” Hermione finished, ignoring Ron.

(HBP)

I know she just mentions he's tall (Ron is there, after all), but the implication is that he's hot and has no idea.

Besides, both James and Lily are described as good-looking by various characters, JKR said of James: "James was reasonably good looking, though not as good looking as Sirius" and considering Sirius is one of the most attractive characters in the series, this is one hell of a compliment. As Harry is a decent mix of both their features, he is likely good-looking. He probably looks pretty cute as a tiny, scrawny kid with bright eyes, and he grows to be more handsome and attractive as he grows. Like, I don't think that many girls would be interested in him in 6th year if he wasn't also handsome, so Hermione is right. Harry isn't as smoking hot as Sirius or Tom Riddle, but he is still very good-looking.