#you know what I love about this particular flag? it had like an explosion on it

[londonspirit]

Paste Magazine: Going back to the fan reaction to Season 1, a second season seemed assured. But then major management and content shifts were happening at WBDiscovery and Max, which delayed the pick-up. When you finally did get the Season 2 order, did you fundamentally change your thoughts about the story you wanted to tell?

David Jenkins: No. I think they’ve been a dream to work with. Every time I’ve made something, there’s been major corporate upheaval and I am starting to think that every time anybody makes something, particularly now, there’s major corporate upheaval. The first season of this television show took place in one era. The second took place in still another era that has since ended. And if there was going to be a third season, it would take place in an entirely new era.Throughout it all, we’ve had the same execs. Suzanna Makkos has been with the show for both of those seasons and they’ve been nothing but supportive. 

In terms of us in the [writers’] room, we just try to mind our own business, and make sure we can pay for everything.

Paste: As the season has progressed, have you been surprised by the audience’s reaction to any particular story lines?

Jenkins: Well, I’m not trying not to be as plugged in as I was in the first season. I’m just trying to let it have its own life. But I love how excited everybody was about Izzy (Con O’Neill) singing. Everyone wants the full “La Vie en Rose” recording from Con, which is beautiful. 

I love that Ed and Stede getting together and having sex was not a titanic explosion. It was more like, “Of course they’re gonna have sex. They’re together, so that beat is gonna happen.” And I love the general acceptance of Buttons (Ewen Bremner) turning into a bird, which is the most ludicrous story point. 

Paste: Our Flag Means Death has such a passionate LGBTQ fandom and that audience has been burnt many times before with promised “ships” that have ended badly, or with the painful “bury your gays” trope. Going into “Mermen,” this fandom was sweating with anxiety, but you gifted them a love letter. Did their expectations feel especially weighty when writing the finale?

Jenkins: It felt like the opposite, and the wind was in our sails. We could fully go into these storylines with all of these different characters and [know] people are invested in all of these relationships. Doing things when we’re writing that excite us and guessing—most of the time, correctly—that fans will love it is a great feeling. The thing we’re trying to do, in the room, is [ask]: do we like it, does it surprise us, and does it feel exciting? And the room has a spectrum of sexualities, so it’s just making sure that, “Hey, we doin’ okay? Does everybody feel good about what we’re putting out there?”

When you have a show, you run the Deathstar, essentially. You’re shooting this beam out into the culture, that if you aren’t paying attention, you could do a lot of damage. I think particularly for this season, that “bury your gays” thing… I didn’t want to end on a downbeat for Ed and Stede. We did that in the first season. I like that there’s a lot of different flavors. It’s even a little melancholy because the Republic of Pirates got blown up. But there’s still more good things.

Paste: In the breaking of the season, how much changed while plotting out the season to the finale?

Jenkins: I wanted to start at the Republic of Pirates this season and end at the Republic of Pirates. And I knew I wanted the Republic of Pirates to be destroyed, ultimately. Within that, we are making a one-hour show on a half hour budget, on a half hour schedule. The questions then become: if we have a bar fight, and you have everyone fight, how big can we make it? And if we have everything blow up, how much can we blow up? Or if we have a fight, how big of a fight and what parts of the fight can you actually show? It’s about making something that felt like it had some heft and size to it. In the room, talking through it, as a showrunner I’m thinking, “Oh, man, we’re gonna put these department heads through hell. They’re gonna have to work so hard.” You already feel bad. 

Paste: That beach battle with Ed, Zheng, and Stede fighting in parallel with the moving cameras was impressive. 

Jenkins: It was the entire team working so well together when everybody’s fried by the end of the season. Like you hand the script to [costume designer] Gypsy Taylor and she sees that she has to come up with 200 English uniforms. She blanches, but then she nails it. And it’s an amazing team across the board. I think we all pull together because we like it. We want it to feel epic.

Paste: Was there much debate about any particular story line for the finale?

Jenkins: In terms of ending this season, it all felt right just in talking through it when we were in the room. It felt pretty intuitive. When you get to the third act of the story, things kind of settle in. There’s gonna be a funeral. We always knew we wanted a wedding at the end of the second season. And I knew that I wanted Stede and Ed to start an inn together. So once you have those beats, it’s kind of locked in. But I wasn’t prepared for the emotional weight that I feel when the crew sails off together and the parents are watching from the inn. It’s just lovely. 

Paste: Speaking of that funeral, Con O’Neill played Izzy’s journey across two seasons so beautifully. When did it come to you that his last words to Ed about just being himself were going to have such an impact?

Jenkins: It’s kind of a strange arc in that I knew we were going to put him through all these things, and I knew he would ultimately die. But I think him becoming a father figure to Ed in the last episode didn’t really dawn on us until we were breaking the last episode. Asking what would this man say to Ed at the end because they’ve been together through everything? He went from a troubled and downtrodden employee to a jilted lover to a discarded employee, to someone that is just trying to find his footing again—no pun intended—to actually becoming this guy’s parental figure on some level. And he’s one person who kind of raised Ed right, because Blackbeard usually kills his parental figures. So, it felt right and it felt like that’s how the mentor dies. The mentor in a story usually dies in the second act and then our hero has to go on and try to do it without them. It felt like the right journey for Izzy and a gratifying one for Condon.

Paste: OFMD doesn’t have a third season pick-up yet, so it’s a difficult feat for writers to thread the needle in a finale that gives audiences closure but also leaves enough story to continue. 

Jenkins: I don’t think it was a very hard thing to do. I think it was more that I felt a responsibility to leave Ed and Stede in a good place, at least for now. It’s not gonna go well. They’re not going to run a business well. Ed’s too much of a talker. Stede can’t focus. It’s gonna be challenging. 

Paste: So you have more stories to tell?

Jenkins: For a third season, I have a clear idea of the way through that so it will be good, big, and interesting. But not too big, Max. 

[wroteonedad]

Interstellar (2014) Is A Barry 63 Film

Barry 63: A man photographed with a pint of lager in his hand, the type of man you would see in your local racist pub with the England flag on one wall and the dartboard across from it.

I have never seen a Christopher Nolan film in my life, I think that is one of the most important first things I have to say on this matter. I know nothing about him or his real niche in film, but I think I'm starting to get it. I watched this film on a whim; I had spent my afternoon browsing videos on YouTube from different people discussing the House Oversight video that has just come out of former U.S Intelligence Official David Grusch vaguely confirming that aliens are real. Before he gets pressed into further questioning and he's all like oh lol I can't talk about that part publicly,,,, as if the guy didn't just tell the entire planet that the U.S are storing 'non human' items and living beings somewhere. Anyway. The point is through these videos, a lot of YouTuber's then began to comment on their fascination with space and the idea of other life on other planets, and this went onto another tangent where Interstellar had been vaguely referenced as a point of reference for interest in the galaxy and further out. I guess this is what originally drew me to wanting to watch the film.

Furthermore, there is a lot about Nolan in the press right now, especially with the recent release of Oppenheimer; a movie I literally could not go and see in the cinema because I would so have an autistic meltdown over *that* atomic bomb scene. I've seen the scene anyway since a wonderful person on TikTok decided to film just that one scene in the cinema and post it online. So I decided to do some delving into Interstellar. My boyfriend told me to the best way to consume the film was to not keep turning the volume up and down (something you need to do a lot) because I would get jumpscared by the sudden loud noises, usually of rockets and space explosions. It was easier to instead turn the subtitles on and really listen because if there's anything about Nolan, it's that he loves to mess around with the sound mixing to the point you have no idea what the characters are even saying just so Nolan can make the film more 'realistic', he doesn't need to. I know for a fact I'm not in space.

The film starts off in a post apocalyptic timeline; the crops are starting to run out, your teachers are encouraging you to run a farm in order to survive while also debunking any theories that working with NASA is a terrible idea while you run for your life wearing goggles and facemasks every time the dust storms begin to rage from afar. Life on Earth is doomed, there isn't much time left and scientists are scrambling to find a way to fix that. Cooper is an ex NASA pilot who spends the early plot tending to his farm and looking after his son Tom* who seems to be failing his classes and Murphy, his daughter who follows the same interest in space and figuring out theories and morse code. Murphy is convinced there is a ghost living in her room, a ghost that knocks particular books off the shelf and as a child she tries to discover what is being communicated to her. Cooper on the other hand is convinced that this is actually a gravitational anomaly.

*did I mention that young Tom is played by our favourite Timoji Chalamat, but I feel like people kind of forget that because this was pre Call Me By Your Name? Slay

One night Cooper and Murphy take off to discover where these anomaly's are coming from, discovering some coordinates that end up taking them to a top secret NASA facility; they are stopped and snatched by some robots. The facility is run by Doctor Brand and it took me a good 5 minutes to realise that it was the Michael Caine. So Doctor Brand reveals to them that he is currently searching for an exoplanet, that a wormhole has opened up by Saturn and that he is organising a group to fly into that wormhole and to discover a planet that humans can move to with the apocalypse riling up in a matter of years. Cooper takes off with Romilly, Doyle and Amelia (Brand's daughter).

On the day of the departure Murphy has a massive strop, begging her father not to go even after he convinces her that he will be back, but she gets even more upset when she learns that even he doesn't know when he will come back.

When the gang get to the other side, they discover three different planets that are orbiting a supermassive black hole (Gargantua). The gang take their craft to the surface of the first planet; it has calm shallow waters and Amelia discovers some debris fairly quickly. She decides to run towards the mountains to collect more data before Cooper realises that those are not mountains, they are tsunami sized waves. It's not a tsunami okay I am just using that for the size reference. Anyway, he makes everyone hurry back to the craft so they can get out of there alive, losing Doyle to the large waves. The craft also nearly gets flooded due to the size of the waves and being thrown all over the place, but it does dry out with little damage over a short period of time. They return back to the base in an hour, which actually turns out to be 23 years in human time due to the time dilation from Gargantua's gravity. Is this sounding simple enough? I am trying to use as little science words as possible even though this is a science fiction film because I always found science so interesting, but yet I was always so bad at it. Back to the plot of the film, during Coopers time on the first planet which is travelling around the supermassive black hole, Murphy begins to work with Doctor Brand in order to help him with the investigation. Iconic considering she wouldn't even speak to her own father when he left.

So the crew (minus Doyle rip girl) travel to the second planet. This one is theoretically the ice age and the gang wake up Dr Mann, a very well respected scientist who has been in a state of cryostasis for however many years. The future looks brighter with this one because it would seem that Mann had collected a lot more data which could suggest this planet is more than capable of being able to contain human life. We've always wanted to live in the ice age on a different galaxy haven't we? But as it turns out Mann was a big fat liar and he faked the data in the hopes that Brand would see it and would send somebody out to rescue him, which clearly didn't happen. At the same time (well not really because of time dilation but you know what I mean) Dr Brand is dying in the hospital and he requested for Murphy to speak to him. When she arrives to see him, Brand also admits he's a big fat stinking liar. He was not even close to the answers for the gravity equation thus meaning he has sent out Murphy's dad and Brand's own daughter on what is basically a suicide mission.

As it turns out after this, Mann becomes even more problematic. He sets up a booby trap in his base and blows up Romilly and then goes out of his way to attempt to kill Cooper. Something very iconic about watching a space dude smack his helmet against another space dudes helmet until suddenly Cooper is running out of air and he is left to die. Except he doesn't the absolute mad lad. I'm starting to think at this point that Cooper might just be one of those people who can never die no matter what obstacle you throw their way.

In the process of Mann trying to hijack the Endurance and make it about him, he manages to blow himself up because he decides to be a bloke and not read any of the instructions or safety steps. Cooper somehow manages to control the now heavily damaged spacecraft. But wait, there's more...

Time is running out swiftly, the rocket no longer has enough fuel for the two to finish the job and they are trying to rack up ways on how they are going to get what they need from the third and final planet. Cooper decides that he is going to execute a fuel burn to be able to reach a speed where the spacecraft would actually arrive to the planet. The problem? Cooper would need to sacrifice his own life in order to carry out the task. The spacecraft detaches and Cooper quite literally falls through a black hole. Being sucked into such a thing, you would die right? RIGHT? No.

Cooper ends up in a five dimensional tesseract where he comes back into contact with Murphy trying to figure out the Morse code or in other lives, trying to get him to convince himself not to go onto this trip into space where the whole operation is ran by a big fat stinking liar. Basically he manages to communicate with Murphy in Morse code in one life while basically being in the walls. Theoretically coming up with the idea that humans have the ability to communicate with people in the past through time-travelling techniques. Does that make sense? Probably not, I think even for me this is all starting to feel a little bit too technological with lots of big words. Cooper manages to communicate what Murphy is looking for so she is able to save the dystopian hell she is living in where humans are now on the verge of being wiped out.

These future beings then transport him close to Saturn where he wakes up at the ripe age of 124 years old. He is taken to see Murphy who is now elderly and in the hospital; she has managed to use the gravity equation to enable human's to safely live on a planet that isn't Earth. She feels satisfied and tells her father to seek out Amelia who is seen on another planet taking off her helmet for the first time, ending on a note where she has found another planet that is capable of human life.

I think it's really cool for a film to actually end on a nice positive note, I feel like any movie that isn't pushed for the child audience usually means that the film will end up being depressing with a horrible ending. It's also weird because I feel like Nolan makes movies that all have over dramatic depressing endings. Especially considering that this movie is marketed to blokes, absolutely nobody else. The people who think Elon Musk is the most amazing man to live are the same people to say this is the best film to ever exist. It is full of loud rocket noises for the Musk wet dream, but I do actually think this is a good movie. I very much enjoyed it and it was a nice introduction to Nolan,,, and no I am not going to watch Oppenheimer in the cinema because I think how loud the movie is will literally kill me off.

[trash-mammall]

eight shows to get to know me

thanks @h3rmitsunited fr tagging :)

IN NO PARTICULAR ORDER

1. BBC MERLIN

i watched this show when it was first airing as a kid, and then returned to it 10 years later. it has completely rewired my brain and absolutely had lasting effects on how i view character and relationship building. it’s made me cry so hard i thought i was going to vomit

2. DIRK GENTLY

i think i first watched this in 2018, and then continued to rewatch it like 5 times, got 8 pages into writing an essay on why it shld be renewed, fell off a bit, and ever since i’m pretty sure every year i’ve fallen back into it. right now i’m off of it, but i miss it and it’s only a matter of time. fundamentally changed my perception of how plot and story can work, how weird you can get with it

3. MYTHBUSTERS

i fully grew up on this show. i haven’t watched it in years but it lingers in the back of my mind and it helped me continue to love science and math even though school sucked. also explosions and weird myths i got to learn about. simply iconic

4. TED LASSO

this one’s a newer one but it very quickly shot into my top shows of all time. it’s so compassionate in its writing and so genuine in its acting and i simply adore it. also i ted is my dad now

5. OUR FLAG MEANS DEATH

this one’s pretty straight forward. beautifully created, emotionally powerful, i can’t wait to see where it goes. i hyperfixated and wrote like 5 fics for it during exam season. i love frenchie the most

6. SCRUBS

another one from my childhood — i don’t remember a Ton from it but the parts that i do i Know this show effected some stuff. also it’s the best hospital drama and i’ll die on that hill (this does not include the final season. fuck the final season)

7. MALCOM IN THE MIDDLE

and ANOTHER one from my childhood. watched this whole show w my family, it’s absolutely iconic. so funny, so loving, probably mentally effected me more than i care to admit or can articulate. i need to rewatch it since i haven’t since i was like 10

8. WHAT WE DO IN THE SHADOWS

this show is a masterpiece in its writing but i love it Particularly for its practical effects, i love them so much. the story and characters are so compelling tho, and even the characters that suck are so unique and personable that you enjoy their screentime regardless, it’s fantastic

this was hard bc i don’t actually watch very much TV but :) welcome to the inside of my brain if anyone has any questions i would love to be enabled to talk more on any and all of these shows

EDIT: honourable mention to camp camp i will not explain further

[mizutori-heiko]

Mizutori’s bakudeku fanfiction master list [complete works]

Really really good writing by these incredible authors. In no particular order! These are all Top!Bakugou and Bottom!Deku. If A/B/O dynamics then it’s Alpha!Bakugou and Omega!Deku. Yes, I have preferences.

Canon World – until 15k

What The Fuck Did You Just Call Me? by reading_raindrop | 8,303 | Izuku starts calling him Bakugou and it pisses the explosive teen off a lot more than he thought it would.

Oh right, you were a little sh*t by SaysiWrites | 5,653 | When Midoriya Izuku gets hit by an age-reversion Quirk, the last thing anyone expected to find out is that Toddler-Izuku is a little shit. Except for one Bakugou Katsuki, who has seen this phase one too many times already. (Bonus+ the entire Little Sh*t (Kidfic) series)

Do Not Disturb by surveycorpsjean | 10,010 | Apply enough force, and something is bound to break.

And Atlas fell by supercrunch | 15,185 | They move in together, after a while. Katsuki joins Best Jeanist and Izuku trains under Gran Torino. They still take comfort in each other every day, curl up in bed and kiss and talk about how life is going. Their live are tumultuous, after all, what with villains and training and rescuing people every week. It’s nice to have something certain. At the end of a day filled with violence and adrenaline, Izuku knows he can come home to someone concrete. It’s perfect. Being a hero is scary and grueling and uncertain, but this part is just right. And then, one day, a child dies in Izuku’s arms.

be loved by bonnia | 5,403 | The kidnapping incident leaves bakugou traumatised about being touched on the back of his neck, and midoriya decides to take matters into his own hands.

Big Protein by Mysecretfanmoments | 13,683 | Bakugou Katsuki has a thriving hero career, an agent to manage his famous attitude, and absolutely zero romantic interest in anyone. With the exception of his favourite health food joint refusing to expand to his city, his life is pretty damn perfect—so why does a viral video revealing Deku's stash of dirty mags involving him and Deku together turn everything upside-down?

Chocolate cake and resin preserved flowers by Anoksun | 11,396 | Izuku loses his memories. Katsuki struggles not to lose Izuku too.

Twin Stars by theperksofbeinglarissa | 8,435 | When Deku saves a woman's life, her quirk is accidentally activated. Her quirk? She reveals a person's soulmate. A star-shaped mark appears on Midoriya's left arm... and on Bakugou's as well. Kirishima is the only one who knows that Bakugou is Midoriya's soulmate, and Bakugou isn't taking the news very well. Can the twin stars of class 1-A work out their differences and find their happy ending?

Unhealthy Fixations by Thesis | 12,522 | Izuku is an adult who knows better than to crush on his childhood bully. AND YET.

Like the Moon by osakakitty | 14,781 | Katsuki Bakugo is having constant, erotic dreams about Izuku Midoriya. He isn’t sure why, but they won’t go away. In order to make them stop, he needs to figure out what Izuku Midoriya means to him.

Worth a Second Shot by cinnabee | 13,080 | Katsuki and Izuku celebrate registering as a Hero Duo together with a big party. What could go wrong?

Like Something Out of A Shoujo Manga by Merrywetherweather | 2,971 | Deku ends up in a rather interesting quirk accident, one that triggers flag events as if he were the protagonist of an otome game.

Canon World – 15k++

Blood Moon by lalazee | 94,860 | The Thank-Fuck-We-Aren’t-Dead Sex had started then, and had never really stopped. Then came the feelings and the fights. The ego, the pride, the jealousy. And then there was Us.

The Way You Used To Do by edema_ruh | 669,463 | During a battle, Midoriya gets hit by a villain whose quirk detaches his soul from his body. Stuck in a ghost-like state, the boy enters a race against time in order to save himself from permanently dying. Much to his luck - or lack of it -, the only person who can see and talk to him in this state is no one other than Kacchan.

Just Like Breathing by MD_Daydreamer | 35,423 | Izuku got engaged. He didn't mind. If that made Uraraka happy, he could do it. He thought his life wouldn't change much.But then, Kacchan went to live in the USA.

briar roses (and hundred years of sleep) by vannral | 15,951 | In which Izuku is hit by a ‘Sleeping Beauty’ Quirk, Class 3-A tries to find his True Love and get them to kiss him, and Katsuki’s very angry about it all.

"what's your type?" by sapphicflower | 20,192 | In order to increase their popularity rankings as up and coming pro heroes, Izuku and Katsuki participate in the most popular late night talk show for hero duos - ‘Heroes Rising!’. They’re killing it, obviously, because they know each other from inside and out. Until one question stumps the two of them: “What is your hero partner’s type?”

and it was Just Right by cinnabee | 23,759 | Katsuki spends two years post-graduation in a furious one-sided competition with his childhood friend and rival's promotional photos - until they finally run into each other, and, well. You shouldn't believe everything you see in magazines. A love story about size differences.

Notice Me, Nerd by useless_donut | 40,000 | Bakugou is in love with Midoriya. He doesn’t hide it, in fact it’s so painfully obvious that the entire class of 3-A has him figured out in a matter of months (days, in some cases). Too bad Midoriya is the most oblivious motherfucker out there, and Bakugou is too damn stubborn to actually ask him out. A love story as witnessed by the class of 3-A.

in your dreams, nerd! by sapphicflower | 37,639 | In a strange and unexpected set of circumstances, Izuku and Katsuki find themselves sharing their dreams together whenever they happen to fall asleep at the same time. Being hopelessly in love with each other, they don’t mind it all that much. What better way to spend time with your crush than in a stupidly vivid dream?

Hear Me by my_name_is_Levi | 22,419 | It wasn’t as if nightmares were uncommon for the freshman class of Yuuei. They’d seen plenty of things, heard and felt and witnessed enough travesty in their lives to last them a lifetime. But Midoriya Izuku was screaming, and no one, not even Bakugo Katsuki could ignore it.

Bridges by supercrunch | 18,018 | Bakugou is signed up for a Calvin Klein modeling gig. The thing is, they really do need the money. And Katsuki's technically the leader of this bunch of morons, so he finds himself taking the job even though his pride will never recover. And even though nobody thought to tell him that he'd be working with his ex-boyfriend. You know, the cute freckled guy from high school who went and broke his heart. So, yeah. This whole situation kind of sucks.

objective truth by mamalade | 15,390 | Izuku gets hit with a truth quirk, as one does. He seems to be handling it well—until Katsuki shows up.

catharsis by dollcewrites | 15,071 | It's been six years since Izuku graduated.It's been six years since he confessed to his childhood friend; his classmate and his inspiration. It's been six years since he deleted Bakugou's number, asked his friends not to mention the name, spent every last effort of his heart turning off the TV and averting his eyes from the newspapers. It's been six, long, long years since he gave up on Katsuki Bakugou ever loving him back.

Here here, my friends and me (You are my familia) by Jeka | 128,832 | Bakugou Katsuki has made a great job of ignoring the fact that he is tragically in love with Deku, someone who could never love him like that and let's face it, he doesn't deserve. Now that he can't ignore it anymore, he has to find a way to keep his childhood friend and move on for his own sake. Or so he had thought, maybe he can have Deku, after all. Izuku has everything he always wanted in life. But suddenly he has to navigate the most important relationship in his life through different eyes.

Canon World – Jealous! 

Hands Off by SaysiWrites | 7,140 | When a new girl at school starts flirting with Bakugou, his friends quickly become invested in the idea of their friend experiencing love - even if he doesn't seem at all interested in her. What they don't see is Midoriya fuming in the background. But how can he get rid of her when they've spent so long keeping their relationship a secret?

Surfaces by surveycorpsjean | 25,225 | Katsuki has a new girlfriend, but something isn't right. As impossible as it is, Izuku can't help but wonder what it'd be like to be called Katsuki's girl.

Green-Eyed Beast by SecretKiwi | 4,721 | Everyone wants a piece of Katsuki Bakugou, but they should beware of the Green-eyed beast always lurking close behind him.

Green with Envy by Sol_Morales707 | 2,611 | Izuku Midoriya is not as innocent and pure as everyone thinks he is. The truth was he was very jealous and willing to do anything for a certain blonde.

Happy Camper by Arysa | 7,074 | Wanting a break from the stress of dealing with the rookie Pro Hero grind, a handful of students from Class A decide to go on a camping trip. Izuku's excited to relax and catch up with everyone, especially Kacchan. But, well, Kacchan's... Kacchan. And dating Kirishima.

How to stop time: kiss by Teddingtons | 31,693 | Deku finally asks Uraraka out. Everyone's supportive except Bakugou who can't even look him in the eye. Deku seeks him out after and is hit with truth.

What I Deserve by s_the_queen | 16,671 | When Izuku starts dating a student in General Studies, everyone is happy for him. She's super sweet and really caring. But something doesn't sit right with Katsuki.

Deku's Already Fucking Taken by asdfjkl129 | 20,704 | 5 times people don't realize that Deku is already in a very happy relationship and try their hand at asking him out, and then in Bakugou's unique and special style, get very firmly corrected, +1 time where no correction is needed.

His by sister_elric | 6,206 | Izuku would like to consider himself a pretty level headed individual. Sure, he had the occasional tunnel vision, especially when it came to training. And hero work. And Kacchan. But, overall, Midoriya felt as though he typically kept his cool. Well, maybe that was a stretch. But, at the very least he could understand his own emotions. So, it surprised even him when an unfamiliar emotion coursed through him as a first year approached his boyfriend, Katsuki.

Down the Red Line by MinervaHope | 7,804 | Izuku has been able to see the red strings of fate since birth. It's no surprise that his is connected to Katsuki.

Canon World – Fake Relationship Goes Wrong

how he should’ve known (and how it turned out) by vannral | 43,918 | In which Katsuki and Izuku pretend to be a couple to avoid journalists, the plan backfires magnificently because of course it does, and the act goes on. Includes feelings, pining, domestic fluff and jealousy.

Vicious by feelslikefire | 105,173 | Midoriya and Bakugou wind up in the very last position either of them thought they'd be in: Hero Partners. It's not fun, but they learn to cope. Their first big assignment together takes them undercover to infiltrate a cult, but the situation turns out far more sinister than they first thought.

What I can never tell you by Mikacrispy | 27,067 | After living in the US for 5 years, Izuku returns to take care of a concussed Bakugou who believes they're engaged. Now, Izuku has to pretend he's in a relationship with the man he's loved for most of his life, knowing that it's just a matter of time until Katsuki gets better and realizes it's all a lie.

Not-Dating by MiraChaDoodles | 14,290 | Katsuki takes Deku on a not-date to save his career, only to find himself wishing it were real.

we'll do the things that lovers do by ethereals | 29,544 | Izuku gets an invitation to Shouto's wedding and Katsuki is PISSED that he asks Kirishima to be his date (also he wasn't even fucking invited

Canon World – Friends With Benefits (?) 

Four Times Bakugou Katsuki Doesn't Intend to Sleep With Midoriya Izuku (And the One Time that He Does) by fallingraine85 | 17,601 | He hadn’t planned for any of this. He isn’t about to go delving into the ball of yarn that is Midoriya Izuku’s heart; he isn’t equipped to try and untangle and make sense of it all. He isn’t about to try to analyze how he’s feeling about all of this, either.... How many times can you repeat the same mistake?

We Wear Chains on the Weekend by surveycorpsjean | 35,086 | Well, in a day of revelations, it turns out that Izuku isn't as vanilla as Katsuki previously thought. Unfortunately, that fascinating discovery is overshadowed by Izuku's dumbassery, because he has zero concept of aftercare."Don't go to anyone else," Katsuki says, because screw it. He can do a better job anyways. Or; Katsuki finds Izuku on a bad drop.

Just for Now by Shiro_Kabocha | 48,135 | Katsuki's parents are out of town over a school break and to keep him from getting up to any shenanigans, they ask Izuku to house sit with him. What are two teenaged boys to do when left alone to their own devices? (Bonus+ the entire Just for Love series)

safe in the darkness by yoonskisses | 20,855 | Izuku and Katsuki had been meeting up secretly for months, with absolutely no feelings involved. Or so Katsuki thought at least. The dorm gossip about Ochaco and Izuku's new relationship seemed to set a spanner in the works for their arrangement.

Alternative Universe – No Quirks

Bluebird by EtherealBeing | 53,108 | Dialing a wrong number was no unusual occurrence. Everyone did it once in a while, and Katsuki was well aware of that fact. However, possessing this knowledge made it no less aggravating for him to discover — a full two minutes into his rant about his day — that he’d been venting his frustrations to a complete stranger. As if that wasn't enough, said stranger was also inexplicably determined to hear his story to its end.

Someone Borrowed by mynameis152 | 138,996 | It felt like hours that he stared at Izuku, coming to terms with the fact that a man, his childhood best friend, whom he hadn’t seen since their senior year of high school, was there in front of his very eyes. Then his brows furrowed and his jaw clenched before he uttered through gritted teeth the very name Izuku had longed to hear for years. “Deku.”

Dark Side of the Sun by Synnie | 51,598 | Staying up too late playing video games, Kirishima wasn't expecting to get an urgent call begging for help. Next thing he knew, he was letting his classmate Izuku Midoriya take refuge in his apartment - without consulting his always angry roommate.

Manage Me by Justaperson1718 | 10,756 | Izuku becomes Katsuki’s model agent.

Don't Set Your Drink Down by Crandberrycrush | 88,424 | With sudden clarity Izuku realized he had broken the first rule of going out. Never leave your drink unattended.

Livewire by pretty_rekless | 18,160 | Per Ochako's request, Izuku downloads a gay dating app in hopes to finally find a partner. Except every single one of his leads keep ghosting him or standing him up... That is until one hot, fiery blond enters the chat. Grindr/Tinder AU fic.

Drinking Watermelon by warschach | 8,906 | Katsuki works as a camp counselor, and Izuku is a boy made of summer heat and sunlight.

Precious Pet by Mikacrispy | 6,379 | When broke college student Midoriya Izuku found a job that offered lodging, food, and good pay for four hours of work each day, he thought it was too good to be true. But he called anyway. Turns out all he has to do is to be the spoiled little puppy of a rich businessman.

Our Eleven Summers by Dark_Mage_Ayumu | 34,472 | The first time Katsuki met Izuku was when he was eight. For the next eleven years, Izuku changed his life, and no one even knew. Their relationship was something they shared in secret.

sticky note crushes by ladyofsnails | 3,239 | Katsuki hates his roommate. The green-haired, freckled, artsy son of a bitch with his dumb pun t-shirts and paint-stained hands he can’t fucking keep to himself. Katsuki can’t leave a single assignment or paper out in his room because that idiot will just grab anything to draw on it. He’s like a shark that can’t stop swimming else it’ll die – he can’t stop drawing. Ever.

Don't Play Pretend by SweetSide | 10,103 | Actor AU: Deku and Bakugou get the leading roles for an upcoming TV Drama. They weren’t aware that they would be working with each other for who knows how long. It would’ve been completely fine if they weren’t exes.

97.6 FM by jamjars | 32,249 | Izuku can’t stop listening to the radio host with the deep voice who sounds like he’s stuck in 2010. It’s a harmless crush. That is until he starts calling into the show under the pseudonym Deku.

Read {between} Your Lines by greatcloudninja | 52,252 | Midoriya Izuku, up-and-coming actor, has finally hit his big break (...), Bakugou Katsuki, who has been acting for over twenty years.However, Bakugou seems to have it out for Izuku, leading to tension both on and off set. When some incriminating photos surface, the studio suggests (...): having Bakugou and Midoriya fake a relationship to get ahead of the rumors. 

I’m not looking for somebody with some superhuman gifts by PassingShadow | 5,522 | Izuku is a professional cuddler and Katsuki is his new client that’s just a little rough around the edges, and needs a natural healing touch.

Alternative Universe – Quirkless Deku

A Good Old-Fashioned Tattoo AU by lalazee | 14,437 | After their paths had split, Bakugou & Deku meet again as adults. While Bakugou begins to repent for the kid he used to be, he also starts to prove himself as he the man he is now.

Call Me a Safe Bet (I'm Betting I'm Not) by WTTTD | 10,803 | He wished he had some sort of heads up before seeing Deku again for the first time after nearly two years, looking like the essence of a lazy Sunday, smiling and surrounded with brand new, adoring friends. It was a little fitting that Katsuki burned for him so badly. (Support Department Deku)

In Which Kacchan Has a Ruff Time by OneshotPrincess | 14,511 | Bakugou Katsuki gets quirked into a dog, gets adopted by an unknowing Izuku and generally has a very rough few days full of realizations

While You Were Sleeping by Belkacaramelka (annabelleg) | 71,197 | The one where quirkless fanboy Midoriya Izuku rescues Pro Hero Todoroki Shouto, gets mistaken as his fiancé while he is in a coma, and gets caught up in the most unlikely fake engagement... until his childhood enemy and Todoroki's classmate Bakugou Katsuki tries to catch him out, and they both end up discovering a lot more about each other than they'd expected.

Let Me Assist You Personally by Seeress | 32,806 | Izuku is long-suffering Personal Assistant to #1 Pro Hero Dynamight.Dynamight can't keep a PA to save his career. They all quit crying after a few days weeks. Enter, Izuku—with enough money problems to brave the jaws of the cranky beast. Childhood friend turned glorified paid slave. Somehow it all works out. ‘Kill them with kindness’, his mom had told him once. If that were true, Bakugou Katsuki would be stone-cold dead by now.

Smile For The Camera by kurokonekokilled | 19,179 | Midnight has a cam site, home to millions of users, but one catches Katsuki's eye when he goes scrolled through it in search for something to help him release a little stress. A live stream and the best orgasm of his life later, his wallet is lighter, and he might be almost as obsessed with this Deku guy as the cam boy is with him.

Just Like The Comics by brichibi | 24,935 | Where Izuku works at a comic book shop because that’s as close to a hero as he’s gonna get, and Katsuki plays the part of heroic ex-boyfriend who is good at everything except winning Izuku back... maybe

Alternative Universe – Quirks

Get on my Level by Mikacrispy | 92,273 | Bakugou Katsuki is a Pro Hero whose boss demands him to take an intern. Midoriya Izuku is a UA student who needs an internship. When the two of them are put together, they learn about what it truly means to be a Hero and what it means to be in love.

A/B/O – Secret! Baby

Home by Emerald2402 | 87,214 | Midoriya Izuku left Japan in a rush, moving to America without a word to anyone else. But then almost 11 years later he arrives back Home and Bakugou Katsuki's Alpha is furious. Fuck that, Bakugou is furious, because Midoriya Izuku, an omega he tasted one time, has been keeping a very big, very blonde haired, green eyed secret.

Those Under the Same Stars by PerpetuallyPerturbed | 325,553 | When Katsuki Bakugo left Izuku Midoriya five years ago, he thought it was for forever. He put aside dreams and wishes of the omega to focus on his career. He was going to be the best hero, after all. He couldn't have an omega getting in his way. So when he's stopped on the streets one day by a pup begging for help for his mom, he isn't prepared to face what he gave up, and what the consequences of his actions were. (Quirkless Deku)

A/B/O – Quirks

Mark Me. Make Me Yours. by decadentbynature | 10,062 | Midoriya is the only Omega at UA and he's been hiding it well but there's one issue that threatens to expose him: his attraction to an Alpha, Bakugo. After being told to give some paperwork to Bakugo, Midoriya lets him into his dorm room and is immediately overwhelmed by his scent. Unable to help himself, he gives in to his urges, only to be discovered by Bakugo but instead of becoming enraged, Bakugo decides to give Midoriya exactly what he wants

Claim Me by ScientificallySinful (VampireGaaraCheesepuffs) | 114,449 | Being an Alpha has nothing to do with Katsuki's success as a Pro-Hero, the same way Deku's Omega status hasn't kept him from becoming Number Two. Secondary gender doesn't mean anything nowadays and “mating” is an antiquated practice. So when Izuku, his rival, asks Katsuki to Claim him in the middle of the night, there is only one logical thing to say. “What the fuck?”

Change of Plans by Mikacrispy | 185,965 | Alpha Pro Hero Bakugou Katsuki never planned to get married to some random omega but what he wants isn't an option anymore. One for All wielder Midoriya Izuku has suffered injustice too many times and doesn't plan in allowing his secondary gender to dictate how he must live his life. Falling in love was never in the plans.

Going Feral For You by ANGIE_fic | 17,977 | Bakugou has an aggression problem that might have to do with his Alpha. His job is on the line because of it. So what do you do with a pent up Alpha? Yes.Rut. (Quirkless Izuku)

i live for you, i long for you by jeonjeonggukkkkkie | 19,165 | The five times Izuku hinted he wants Katsuki to spend his next heat with him, and the one time Katsuki took the hint.

Baby's First Bloom by ContraryBee | 44,945 | Izuku blooms for Katsuki one warm day in their third year of middle school. What follows is both boys learning about themselves, their bond, and the society they live in.

As Fate Would Have It by ScientificallySinful (VampireGaaraCheesepuffs) | 88,737 | Katsuki Bakugo had plenty of reasons why he wasn't mated yet, not that he was going to explain why to just anyone. But now, Ground Zero was running out of time. If he didn't find someone soon, he'd lose his position as a Pro-Hero and he'd never get to be #1. So, when he finds out there's a male Omega recently arrested for prostitution that's headed to prison if he too doesn't get a mate…well it must be fate. (Quirkless Izuku)

A/B/O – No Quirks

Gravity by warschach | 71,477 | Izuku is back in his hometown and plenty hasn't changed much from the 8 years he was gone. Except, Katsuki Bakugou, the alpha king of their small town. He's hotter- because that's fair, right, God? -, stronger, a now-famous pro fighter, and noticeably nicer this round.Not that he cares, pfft. (Fine, he cares.)

Nine Months by greatcloudninja | 23,303 | Omega Midoriya Izuku connects with Alpha Bakugou Katsuki through an online singles ad. Izuku pays Katsuki to help him with his heat, ending up pregnant in the process. What follows is a pregnancy filled with ups and downs, but whatever hurdles come their way, they can make it through together.

The long dark by Ominous-Anonymous (Ominonymous) | 13,289 | He could have been really dangerous. He could be a fucking murderer for all he knew. But Izuku Midoriya, ever the reckless daredevil, was not thinking of that when he got into a car with a complete stranger. Completely ignoring the part where his mother always taught him to never gets into cars with alphas he didn't know...

[scrollsfromarebornrealm]

The rambling continues.  Here’s Estinien.

Alright.  I’m not gonna lie.  I’m a dragoon fangirl.  I love them.  Square Enix has done them dirty I feel not gonna lie but that’s an entirely different rant.  I met @autumnslance​ over Unorthodox.  Much of my FFXIV fanfiction to a degree is dragoon based.  Estinien is a hot mess not gonna lie, but he’s a hot mess that has fucking amazing character development and he’s good looking too shut up what of it?

Honestly, one of the reasons why I like Estinien so much is that he’s relatable to me.  I know how it feels to have that singular drive, that pure focus on just one thing--and then picking up the pieces when it gets blown all to hell.  In my case it was a slow burn leading to an explosion, and I wasn’t possessed by a vengeful dragon spirit.  I also grew up in a highly religious culture.

And it’s not just me.  I’m pretty sure a lot of people can relate to Estinien in some way--that same thing.  A drive, a purpose, and when it’s gone, what the fuck do you do now?  How do you handle realizing everything you worked for, the goal--it was fucked up?  You were fucked up?  And now you have to unfuck yourself and find something that gives you purpose once more?  For people who were in the military or still are, that’s an even bigger connection--Estinien is a solider that’s trying to find his way in a time of relative peace.

I won’t lie, I’m very tempted to revisit the fic that was helping me dive into his head in the first place (before it got derailed by the lore of him visiting spots on his journey and getting the Trueblood armor HAHAHAHAHA) but I digress.

Now in the beginning of it all?  Especially doing the dragoon questline? I wanted to beat the fucking brakes off this man.  I did not sign up for godsdamned elezen angst with a flavor of First Brood and parental anguish motherfucker pull your head out of your ass for a moment and THINK, PLEASE.  USE THE BRAIN.

(side note.  I will fight anyone who says we didn’t get possessed by Haldrath’s spirit in that questline.  My flag is planted on that hill, do not @ me.  I possibly pissed off some G’raha fans tonight with my opinions, I have no qualms about this.) (:P)

Another thing about Estinien? He’s pragmatic.  Yes he was sniping at Ysayle the whole fucking time (Riven was very close to killing two elezen and leaving their bodies buried underneath a bush in Moghome) but when push came to absolute shove?  He was right by your side.  Granted, there’s a lot of leeway to suggest he might have had issues dealing with your revelations following Nidhogg’s defeat in the Aery and the subsequent truths that followed, but he was there.  He was willing to stand by your side when Aymeric decided to try and make dear daddy see sweet logic and reason, during an event that when finally exposed, pretty much is the trigger for a major cultural shift for his country and people.

*blows out breath*

Now.  There are some things that honestly do annoy me somewhat when it comes to the fanon on him.  One of them?  He’s not a himbo.  He’s not.  This man was the head of the Knight Dragoon Order in Ishgard.  He may have avoided having anything to do with the nobility and politics, but due to that simple fact of being the Azure Dragoon, he needed to have an awareness of the political arena in the city.  If he didn’t, how the hell could he be an effective leader for the Order?  I admit we don’t have any backstory or lore, so it’s up for interpretation, this is solely mine, but again, we’re taking about Ishgard.  You do not take any fucking type of leadership position in that particular city without at least knowing who or what you’re going to be dealing with and how to effectively do so.

Also. I’m pointing this out.

That is the look of a man who is having A Moment.  Estinien coming out of nowhere with seemingly the most random thing, yet I feel it says a lot.  Fourchanut is already grappling with seeing his children pretty much excel as skilled fighters against unimaginable horrors, then he just gets a brick to the face in realizing in that instant that his son can do the same in the political arena.  Probably felt his age briefly too there.  (SSSHH LET ME HAVE THIS)

Estinien could have said anything else.  Anything else!  Considering he views Alphy like a baby brother, he would have been well within his rights to burn Fouchanut’s ears off.  Instead, he goes with what probably was a major aspect of Alphy’s life possibly in Sharlayan--being trained to possibly assume his father’s seat on the Forum.  And the lore up to Endwalker pretty much pegs Fourchanut as a major power player, if not the biggest one, among the Ninety-Nine.

Estinien doesn’t understand the void in patch 6.1, but after Y’shtola breaks it down for him, he’s onboard.  He doesn’t get the finer details but that’s okay, he knows his strength is in taking his spear and violently killing what needs to be killed.  When it was revealed Meteion was the major villain after all, and the other Scions are boggling over what to do, it’s Estinien who goes ‘alright, she’s the big bad.  How do we stop her?’

And yes, the money thing, I dragged his ass too for it, but canonically?  Military.  He was a knight.  He never had to worry for food, or a roof over his head, or even clothing!  All of that was probably put on a tab and paid for him.

(This is probably the point where I would derail onto him with Riven but best to just end my rambling here, I could keep going on)

Estinien is a hot mess, but he’s a functional, pulling himself together hot mess flavored with First Brood draconic aether.  We’re not even going to go into how his connection/synthesis with Nidhogg’s changed him, I’m just going to leave the fact that he’s basically adopted Nidhogg’s role as brother/uncle to the rest of the living children/grandchildren of Midgardsormr AND THEY’RE ROLLING WITH IT.  (Save for Dragon Dad, we don’t know his opinion on the matter but considering he’s been quiet...eeehh maybe?)

[cerastes]

Among many things in Darknight’s Memoir, I love how the themes, and their effect on the cast, get touched upon in a manner that isn’t entirely explicit but isn’t as crystal clear as you’d expect.

For example, at one point, W was entirely willing to blow herself up to take out the enemy. She didn’t particularly want to, but she was going to do it if it came to it and if she had no other way out. When Ines understandably asks her “are you serious?”, W simply answers “well, if there’s no other way out of this, a kill is a kill, right?”. Contrast this with her attitude later, where her demeanor is as playful and caustic as we’ve come to expect from her, but her decisions, however, her courses of action, change entirely. No more thrill-seeking by riding the Catastrophe’s wind, no more gambles, no more unnecessary risks, she’s come to put a value on her own life beyond being a mercenary in the endless war game of the Kazdel barrenlands, she’s got a mission, something she less needs to accomplish and more that she wants to accomplish.

And that’s an important narrative thread in Darknight’s Memoir: To want. Sarkaz mercenaries, by and large, fight for the next paycheck more than anything, to get by, a client that pays is a good enough client. W herself initially came to Hoederer with the intent on killing him and claiming the bounty on his head. Seeing her prey firsthand and noticing she can’t kill him, she joins him instead. And that’s just natural: Why take on a foe that will likely injure you irreparably or even kill you? Better join up, and go for bigger fish. There’s literally no stakes in that fight. There’s nothing beyond the paycheck, but that also means there’s nothing except the paycheck: You can take it, but you can also leave it. The longer lived Sarkaz know when to take and when to live.

W, at this point, Wanted Nothing. Just being able to go through the motions, through whatever fights came next, was good enough. One of the first scenes we are treated to involves W throwing a team of her own mercenary corps under the bus to make it out alive. As a reader, our first reaction most likely is “wow, what a bastard”, but then you see Hoederer and Ines’ reaction, and it’s simply “oh, yeah, that happens”. It’s completely normal. That just happens in Kazdel and among Sarkaz, it’s the norm. That’s not to say it isn’t appalling, but in the context of Kazdel, that’s just another day in the job.

There’s no Want. Or technically speaking, there’s a very superficial, utilitarian, soulless Want: The next day, the next paycheck, the next meal, the next fight. Who cares about whatever the trillion of ‘noble’ Sarkaz clans are fighting for or peddle? They have their flags and their sigils and their plastic speeches, but they are all the same: The same warriors, the same traitors, the same devils. Whichever pays you, it’s all the same.

That changes when W meets Theresa. The full breadth of their dynamic is not explored in Darknights’ Memoir, but it’s made very clear that seeing the King of Kazdel, the sovereign of all Sarkaz, the noblest of nobles herself, Theresa, hunched over clumsily trying to fix a janky door, had an effect on W. Well, that, and their subsequent dialogue. Theresa was likely the first Sarkaz W met that wasn’t at least romancing a few ways to kill her, that simply wanted to know her name, and a little more about her. To us, Theresa showed the barest of cordialities with a kind demeanor, but to W, it was likely something that sent her brain into a blue screen of death state. She took an interest in Theresa, unlike she ever did with any other Sarkaz, or noble, or even any other person, and she observed her and served her.

And that there is when a pivotal change occurs: Want.

There is now Want. W No Longer Wants Nothing. She wants to see Theresa interact with others, she wants to see her alone, she wants to see how she does this and that, she wants to see her ideals through, she wants to actually believe in what she has to offer, because for the first time, it’s not a paycheck on the other side of the table that’s motivating her, it’s being able to see someone sincerely working towards a noble goal without ulterior motives and without betrayal, someone who actually believes what she preaches. Not long before this particular cutscene, Hoerderer mentions having killed someone that was trying to assassinate him, a guy he knew and that called him his friend, that even said he’d love for him to marry his daughter. This is the Sarkaz Normal. Literally everything is meaningless to the Sarkaz, even camaradeire. Not on Babel, not on that landship. W might as well have seen paradise in Babel, and in Theresa, a Messiah.

And, see, this is what I love about Darknights’ Memoirs: W doesn’t suddenly turn soft. W doesn’t do a 180. W supports the lofty goals of Theresa in the ways she knows, no doubt dyed by Theresa’s colors, but nonetheless using the skills and temperament that comes natural to her. W was born and nurtured by the battlefield, it’d make no sense for her to suddenly discard all of it, but the colors of Theresa are evident from this point on, even after Theresa’s passing.

W never becomes any less ruthless to her enemies, but there’s clearly a change to the melody of her percussive explosives. It’s no longer about the next battlefield, it’s no longer about the next paycheck, no, every move, from there on, has one clear objective: Kill Theresis, for having Theresa killed.

Now, revenge is nice and cold, but there’s a difference in how she’s going about this: As Hoederer mentions he wants out of this sordid lifestyle, W’s first reaction is to lament the loss of a capable hand, but to otherwise tell him that, if he’s getting out, he might as well Take This Specific Route She Knows Is Safest. It’s not the first farewell she’s given her blessing to: In this very conversation, Hoederer muses that W’s turned soft for letting Flamebringer leave without repercussions. While W’s Sarkaz ended up directly killing Scout’s team, Ines herself outright says to Scout that W didn’t have the heart to kill her old Babel ally (and this is an important distinction: Remember that W is loyal to Babel, not Rhodes Island), with W likely half counting on The Ghost of Babel to be able to make it out with his considerable skills (although if we recall what Scout had to say in Operational Intelligence, he seems to have been pretty aware he was going to die one way or another, and accepted this; his lack of regrets make more sense when you consider he IS the reason why RI was able to rescue Doctor at all, thanks to his deal with W so she’d let Rhodes Island pass). W, at this point of Want, is at that point where she’s not losing any sleep if she has to off someone so her cover in Reunion is believable and isn’t blown, but if she can avoid killing RI Operators, she’ll try and take that road (such as her not killing Adnachiel). Obviously, it’s not exactly the most altruistic or heroic of attitudes, but it’s about as good as it gets for, again, someone who used to believe that using her own teammates as cannon fodder to cover her retreat was perfectly normal and expected, even.

Recall the talk Ines and Hoerderer had about flags. Hoerderer says he’d rather forget about their flag, because it’s an empty symbol, and there’s no real flag for him to believe for... Instead, he believes in the flagpole: You could take that to be a very pure representation of Kazdel as a concept, as this eternal, meaningless warzone, where meaningless people wage meaningless conflict for meaningless rewards, create meaningless bonds and ultimately die a meaningless death: The very same man that throws his arm around you, calls you his friend, and tells you to marry his daughter will take a contract on your head the next day. It’s just the flagpole. It’s meaningless. It holds nothing but useless air. A flagpole with no flag is representative of something that has no meaning and no essence, a lone flagpole is exactly that: An ode to being devoid of, bereft of what should be there, but isn’t.

In many ways, as you may have noticed, Hoederer is meant to be a foil to W, and this is no exception: W has a flag, and again, it’s extremely telling that W’s affiliation as an Operator is not Rhodes Island or Kazdel, it’s Babel.

If we can consider Kazdel to mean more than just a physical location, if we can consider Kazdel to represent that meaningless, cruel, harsh style of life and way of death, then so we can consider Babel to be more than simply “Rhodes Island before Rhodes Island”, we can consider Babel to mean the ideology of Theresa, that style of life and way of death, full of meaning, with a clear objective, with a rocky path well worth the bloody trek.

If whenever Hoederer talks about about wanting to “leave Kazdel” as wanting to leave this sordid lifestyle behind once and for all, then thus, W being a part of Babel, despite her contact with Rhodes Island’s Kal’tsit, despite her undercover status as Theresis’ representative of the Sarkaz in Reunion, despite all affiliations, then that means something. And it’s changed her to some degree, sure, but the important change here is not W as a person, but rather, what W chooses to do with what she is and what she can do, successfully breaking out of the endless cycle of meaningless, vapid warfare, participating in it only in order to eventually crush it. Whereas W initially joined Hoederer because she saw herself outgunned, W is actively going against Theresis, even if she is more outgunned than ever, because now she has something she Wants. She could very easily submit to Theresis, but that’s what the past, Want-less W would do, not the current W, driven by Babel.

Because maybe, that’s all that the Sarkaz needed: Not something to believe, because words are cheap and nobles have those a dime a dozen, but someone to believe in. And not just anybody, but someone that can actually promise you more than a meaningless battle the next three weeks, and then deliver with their actions.

Maybe all they need is to Want.

Because sometimes, many times, Wanting is what breaks the stagnant cycle, but do not underestimate how easy it is to forget to Want... Or to never have learned to Want, in the case of the Sarkaz.

[silkylious]

Tsunami (Bakugo Katsuki x Fem!Reader)

Bakugo x fem reader

warnings: swearing, angst, fluff

A/N: Ahhhh this is my first post on tumblr, i hope you like some bittersweet  goodness w angry boi. constructive criticism is much appreciated!

Love.

Such a complex, convoluted emotion that many people find themselves falling helplessly victim to. Of course, there are the cheesy scenes in romantic movies that exaggerate and almost drain all meaning from the prickly feeling; sharing a sweet kiss while basking in the cool caresses of dewdrops, or having a dim-lit home dinner -scenes which drove his gag reflex reeling, he simply couldn’t understand the appeal of mushing faces with someone when he had better things to do, to achieve. He was going to be the number one, dammit, he didn’t have time to waste on cuddling and doing “couple-y shit” with some extra. That’s not to say he’d never had a crush, or found some girls attractive, hot even, but he kept in mind all his “crushes” (he loathes that word with a burning passion) were merely fueled by his hormonal mind, driven by pure sexual attraction. Nothing more, nothing less. So, he never sought out relationships.

And that was enough for him to keep his peace, unhindered and undisturbed on his desolate little boat, one that he was rowing tirelessly towards his end goal, with no waves and no turbulences daring to stand in his way of firmly grasping that number one spot.  

Until a tsunami came crashing in, pummeling him off his safe cruise.

That tsunami was you.

He really should have seen the signs -no that’s not right, he definitely noticed the red flags raising in his peripherals, he should have acknowledged them. It started out as small, barely existent ripples, something to break the monotony of his journey and rock his boat gently. You’d always greet him with that stupidly bright smile, the one that made him feel uncomfortable, skittish (though he hadn’t realized why yet), the one that surely made the sun writhe in boiling jealousy. No matter what time of the day it was, how early in the morning or how deep into the night, you always seemed to make it a point to address him with that unhinged, cheeky grin. He’d reply with a curt nod, or a faint grunt if you caught him on a good day, wanting desperately to ignore the brewing sensation inside him.

“Hey, Bakugo! Did ya sleep well?”

He never replied to the tedious question, refusing to give into the one-sided small talk. That didn’t stop you from resuming your daily routine of pestering him about his training progress or babbling about some movie he couldn’t care less about. He didn’t pay an inkling of attention to the stream of word vomit pouring out of your mouth, no, he much rather zoned in on the way your lips move languidly, still upholding that infuriating smile, the way stray follicles fell over your neck, having escaped from the usual updo you were sporting. His concentration faded in and out of the single-sided conversation, managing to scrap together bits and pieces of whatever you were droning on about. Though he never made any effort in reciprocating your enthusiasm, he never shut you down either (like he would most people), and that was incentive enough for you to keep coming back. To keep talking his ear off with a cluelessly precious smile.

Looking back, he probably should have stopped it there, but he didn’t, he couldn’t help but revel unconsciously in your optimism, though he’d be buried six feet underground before he admitted that. It looked all too peaceful, he didn’t mind the soft stir in his boat, and he was more than content to leave it at that. But then you had to go and push your luck.

You were infinitely aware that he treated you… differently, to say the least, your classmates were also painfully conscious of his strangely tamed and, dare I say, docile way he acted around you, everyone with eyes could see it, except him apparently. Even if he was agonizingly oblivious to his own feelings, yours too, your heart couldn’t help but accelerate whenever he displayed a rare act of kindness towards you. One time in particular, he scolded you for overworking yourself while tending to your wounds, his words lacking the usual bite, none the wiser to the chest palpitations he was effortlessly causing. You couldn’t take it, you had to test your luck. You desired to be closer to him, for him to view as more than a nuisance, you wanted to be more than just acquaintances. With caution thrown to the wind, you embarked on a mission to befriend the Bakugo Katsuki.

That’s when the small ripples that would gingerly sway him turned more rigorous; they evolved into waves, ones he needed to smoothly ride if he didn’t want to fall victim to their ferocity.

He became much more aware of your stature in his lifestyle, how could he not? You’d made it a goal to sit with him during lunch, to share with him your bento box, to talk to him at any given moment. And it was then that he discovered a new part of you, one that was hidden behind your tactful persona. It became a common spectacle during lunch, you two hurling remarks at each other, yours more calculated and sarcastic while his were loud and fiery (in true Bakugo fashion), though the competitive grin stretching his lips, wrinkling the corners of his ruby hues gave away his enjoyment. Bakugo could never get over your quick wit, the speed at which you replied to him with your own quips almost gave him whiplash every time, if he didn’t know better he’d think you were regurgitating pre-written comebacks. It took a bit of coaxing at first, but eventually he gave into your petty bickering (all you had to do was mention Deku this and half-n-half bastard that), and then before he knew it, it was part of his routine, but can you blame him? He was presented with a challenge, of course he’d step up to the plate!

Your waves threatened his quaint, little sail, he had to learn to surf them if he didn’t want to topple over. And so, he did, after all, Bakugo Katsuki never backed down from a challenge.

Your comradery only strengthened from there. You trained together, him pushing your limits with his abysmal power and sheer instinct, you pushing his with precise movements and surprising agility. You strangely complemented each other, both in fighting styles and general attitude. He (aggressively) helped you with your academic shortcomings, and though his methods of teaching were very questionable, they proved to be fruitful as your grades had spiked significantly from his (torturous) aid. You’d grown impossibly closer, spending every waking moment together or thinking about each other. Katsuki didn’t know when it became a habit to anticipate your “goodnight” text, or when just the sight of your face made his anger practically dissipate into thin air.

“So, do you wanna come over to study, I’m kinda struggling with algebra,” You sighed sheepishly, scratching at the back of your head.

“No.” came the blunt response.

“Aw, c’mon, don’t be such a meanie!” You jutted your bottom lip out much like how a kid throwing a tantrum would, his eyes couldn’t help but flicker down to the childish pout, when suddenly it turned into a poorly constrained grin. You had an idea. “Well, whatever, I was gonna order takeout from a new place down the road, I heard they have pretty spicy ramen there, but I guess I’ll order for one,”

You watched with mild amusement and well-concealed affection as his fiery eyes seemed to light up at the mention of spicy food. “Fine, dumbass, but I’m only doing this ‘cuz your sorry ass would fail without me,”

“Mhmm, sure thing, Bakugo,” You practically sang, a teasing lilt to your voice.

Bakugo.

That didn’t sound right at this point. Words left him before his brain could even process what he said, what he was insinuating.

“Katsuki.” He mumbled firmly. Your eyes widened a fraction, giving away your surprise.

“W-What?”

“Call me Katsuki,” It came out more assuredly this time, his glare directed forward as you both walked to your destination, missing the soft smile adorning your lips and the affection oozing out of your gaze.

“Sure thing, Katsuki.” His own lips curled into a faint smile, a tiny tug at the corners of his lips.

A push-and-pull rhythm was created between you; your waves pulling him in, only for his skillful hands and sails to conquer them. It was an endless tug of war, neither of you seemed to mind it, it blanketed you both in a sheen of serenity.

The calm before the storm.

It was merely an innocent question, a teasing inquiry at most, directed at him by his electric blonde friend. “So, man, when are you gonna ask (last name) out? Y’know if you don’t ask her soon, someone else will,”

Katsuki could have sworn he switched quirks with the dunce faced idiot, because at that moment his mind fully short-circuited. Him? And (name)? What would even give him that idea? Sure, she was cute and all -wait, cute?? What the actual fuck? His lack of response and the pinkish tint that spread from his cheekbones to the bridge of his nose seemed to get a rise out of Kaminari, because within seconds his head was thrown back, his laughter catching the attention of their red-haired friend. “Yo, man, what’re you laughing at?”

With that, Bakugo seemed to snap out of his trance, sharp eyes snapping between his self-proclaimed friends. His mouth opened, ready to deliver a curt response, something along the lines of “Fucking nothing!” or “Mind your own business, Shitty Hair!” but the other blonde beat him to the punch, loudly bellowing out,

“Bakugo has a crush on (last name)!”

Bakugo wasn’t pleased to say the least, his hand darting out, flexing a lethal explosion that Kaminari barely dodged. Bakugo’s eyes were wide with unadulterated rage, though he really couldn’t tell at who, nor did he care, he was seeing red at that moment and that’s all he could focus on. Before he can aim another strike towards his cowering friend, Kirishima looped his arms around Bakugo’s shoulders, activating his quirk to prepare for the barrage of oncoming explosions that were sure to come his way. “Dude, stop! You’re being super unmanly right now!”

Realizing there’s no point struggling against his friends hold, Bakugo’s figure suddenly slackened, Kirishima very cautiously relinquishing his grip on his friend. Burning rage, confusion, uncertainty and self-deprecation began to settle in Bakugo’s mind all at once, a million questions stampeding his thoughts. He didn’t like that, he hated not being in control, he hated not knowing what was wrong, especially with himself. With a furious shout of “FUCK OFF!” to dispel some of the anger bristling within him, the ash blonde stomped out of the nearly empty classroom, leaving his two friends to share looks of bewilderment.

And that’s when a tidal wave, a tsunami of emotions quaked his lonely ship, flipping it and hurling him off the deck into the freezing cold, wave riddled ocean, leaving him to sink deeper and flail around in a futile attempt at staying afloat.

The coming days, one thing haunted Katsuki like the plague, despite trying his hardest to avoid overthinking, you just seemed to carve your way into his subconscious. Everything reminded him of you, and he absolutely despised it. When had he gotten so distracted? When had his schedule morphed to make room for your presence in his life? When had he began to await seeing you, hearing your obnoxiously sweet voice? When had he gotten so weak? He didn’t need anyone, no one but himself, that’s all he needed to reach the top. If that was true, then why were his days getting more and more bleak as he actively shunned you out, avoided looking you in the eyes and subsequently being blissfully unaware of the look of hurt in your eyes. He knew he wasn’t being fair to you, but he couldn’t help it, he had to put some distance between you.

And so, he kept struggling against the currents, which only made him sink deeper, and deeper. Even so, he kept wrestling with the tides, hoping he’d make it out alive and free.

His absence in your life made you fidgety, but you brushed it off as him having a less than pleasant day, he’d surely go back to normal, right? Wrong. Things continued as they are, you wanted to give him space and all, but it didn’t help that it seemed he was only circumventing you. You wanted to be patient for him, and you were. But even the most patient of people, the most peaceful of saints, had their tipping points.

“I don’t understand you, Katsuki, we were good not even a week ago and now you’re completely avoiding me!”

“So what if I was, huh?! Are you saying that I need you or some shit?! Are you looking down on me, thinking you’re all high and mighty, that you could be the one to befriend the “pitiful lonely guy”?! Are you saying I’m weak, is that it, huh?! I’m not fucking weak, (name), I don’t need you or anyone for that matter, stop tryna coddle me, I don’t need your shitty friendship!”

Ouch, that hurt. He knew he was spouting so much bullshit straight through his teeth, it didn’t even make sense but that was how his self-defense mechanism works. When in doubt, push people you love away in fear of vulnerability. He knew he was being a major asshole, but nothing would’ve prepared him for the look of unbridled hurt and betrayal in your eyes, tears silently carving valleys on your flushed cheeks. Your quivering lip suppressed a wretched sob, before opening to utter a few heartbroken words.

“I see. Sorry I was such a nuisance for you, Bakugo,”

Bakugo, double ouch. That one stung. Hard. He’d never heard your voice so broken, so raw and meek. He walked home alone that day, already regretting everything he said, already missing your bubbly self.

A drift shook both of you away from each other. Your concerned classmates could only watch in silenced misery as you both hurdled yourselves into hero work and training, doing anything it takes to stay distracted. Bakugo thought that at least there would be one upside to arise from this situation, he could focus more on his dreams, he had more time than ever, he can totally utilize this to his advantage. Or so he thought. You infiltrated every crevice in his mind, all he could think about, day in and day out, was you. He’s always prided himself in being self-disciplined and focused, but right now he was anything but. You weren’t fairing any better. Your optimism was missed in the classroom, you forced a smile to reassure your friends, but that was about all you could muster. It seemed there was no end to the spiral the pair of you were sucked into until something happened. Something big happened.

He was kidnapped. Bakugo was kidnapped.

It seemed like a wake-up call to both of you. You could have lost him; he could have lost you. Bakugo realized, strapped to that chair, with the grey-haired, handy man holding a picture of you from the sports festival while babbling some vague threats, that he wanted to protect you, protect what he loved. He loved you. And he had to be better for you. He also realized that he wanted to go back to you. Dammit, he still didn’t apologize for what he said! He needed to return.

He no longer fought against the tide, he didn’t want to, and he wasn’t going to. And with his fruitless squirming against the current coming to an end, he began to rise to the surface, the gradually heating waters holding him afloat.

His return was a giant relief, you wanted to jump into his arms the moment he was saved, but you knew better. He needed time to think, to sort out his thoughts. Though you didn’t expect that he would sort out his thoughts with his fists. With Midoriya. Actually, scratch that, it was a very Bakugo thing to do.

That night you couldn’t sleep, sitting on the U.A. dorms Alliance stairs with a steaming mug of tea between your clutches. Your eyes, which had been transfixed on the constellations lining the night sky, blinked downward when you heard two pairs of footfalls approaching. You instantly recognized the two boys, beaten and battered.

“(name)...?”

His abnormally scratchy voice greeted you, you didn’t have to strain your ears to conclude that he’d been crying. Your stares were riddled with unspoken words, unvoiced feelings, leaving a pregnant tension in the air. A haggard throat-clearing cut through the quiet.

“I’ll leave you two alone,” And with that, the one-for-all user excused himself into the dormitory.

Katsuki shifted his weight, clearly uncomfortable. He knew what he needed to say he just couldn’t find the will to swallow the lump in his throat and say it.

“Hey, umm-”

Before he can get another syllable out, a force collided with him, shaky arms circling his broad shoulders, mindful of the bruises that littered his porcelain skin. Eyes blown wide; he couldn’t fathom the words that were uttered into his chest.

“I love you, Katsuki. I love you.” A sniff followed the heartfelt words, he felt some tears brimming his own lids.

Carefully bringing his arms around you, wrapping them securely around your waist. Katsuki drifted and swayed on your waves, surfing them skillfully, fully abandoning his past ways, no longer would he scuffle with the ebb and flow of the waters that only hoped of propelling him forward towards his goal. His red gems drifted to the sky, mapping out the stars much like a lost sailor would in search of guidance, though he was anything but lost in that very moment.

His lids dropped, thoroughly fatigued from the day’s events, before his head followed suit, descending and placing feather-like kiss on your head, his strong arms keeping you nestled as close as possible against his chest, a quiet murmur with powerful words left his lips,

“I love you, too. I’m sorry.”

[nite-shay]

Surprise! (Kirishima Eijirou x Reader)

Funny little idea I had. Reader finds out she is prego and wants to surprise her hubby with the news :)

A/N: Nothing really. Charters are aged up. Female pronouns used. 

Hope you enjoy it and sorry for typos, grammar and spelling errors! :)

************

You were practically floating through your local market store's aisles, humming has you picked up items on your list.

Today was a beautiful day. The birds were singing, the sun was shining, and nothing could ruin your mood.

Not even the grumpy old lady blocking our path, complaining to a stock boy about ketchup prices could bring you down!

Any why might you ask? 

Because today you got the best news in the world.

A few days ago, you went to your local clinic. You'd been feeling rather tired here lately and even a bit nauseous. You honestly thought nothing of it and just figured you had a stomach bug that'd been going around.

Image your surprise when the nurse on the other end of the phone informed you that you were not sick, just pregnant. 

It took a few seconds for the information to process, but the moment it does. Oh boy! You screamed and cried in pure joy to the poor, probably now partially deaf nurse on the other end.

After many thank yous and a few apologies, you practically hung up on the women wanting to call your husband imminently. 

You tried him on his cell and on his desk, but he must have been out on patrol. Meaning you wouldn't hear from him until much much later in the day

Damn. 

That burst your bubble, but that just gave a chance to be... well, creative in your news delivery method. You'd spent the last few hours researching and watching videos in the theme of 'Surprising the father baby announcements.'

And boy, oh boy, did you get some ideas! Too many ideas! But you settled on one method in particular. 

You smiled as you made your way over to the produce section.

Ah-ha! There's an item on your shopping list.

You reached out and grabbed two bags of baby carrots before tossing them into your cart. 

It would be a night your husband would never forget!

Later that night...

Let me start off by saying this. You love your husband. Very very much.

Your husband, Kirishima Eijirou, is the most wonderful man on the planet. He is an amazing and loving husband. He is also an amazing hero. Ranked one of the best in Japan and one of the friendliest.  The man is a literal saint who against all odds befriended Bakugou for goodness sake! You love him more than life itself.

Your husband is a lot of things but currently, you can only think of one way to describe your husband. In the words of the blonde explosive best friend, 'he has rocks for brains'.

Bless your husband's heart some days, he can be denser than his skin in his unbreakable form.

You expected him to overlook some of the food you made, BUT NOT EVERY FUCKING THING!

You made a spread of baby-related foods that could give a buffet restaurant a run for their money. You had it all, baby carrots, baby spinach, baby artichokes, baby corn, baby back ribs, fingerling potatoes, a cornish hen, deviled eggs, popcorn shrimp, you had it all! Hell, you even dropped a 'bun in the oven reference'. Twice! 

But did he see the pattern? 

Nope!

His only response was to stare/drool at the food and said, 'wow hun, if I'd known you be making this much food, I'd have invited Amajiki and Togata over'. Later on, he commented on how Fatgum would be jealous of the amazing food he's going to have for lunch tomorrow'.

While you appreciate the comments on your cooking. You could have strangled at that moment. 

Dense. Very dense.

You chanted in your head while he pigged out, 'I love the father of my child, and I will not beat him over the head with chicken' over and over for most of dinner.

As the night continued, you realized after watching both 'Boss Baby' and 'Storks' that you would have to take drastic measures to get it through his thick skull. 

Tomorrow, you'd bring out the big guns!

Maybe you should get Mina involved…

The next day…

"Hey, Red! Wow, what's with all the food?" Fatgum shouted as he watched the redhead placed another container on the table.

"(Y/N) went overboard last night and made a feast! We had a lot of leftovers, so I brought some of them in. Want some?"

"You bet I do! I love her cooking! You really lucked out!"

"Yeah, I did! I have no idea why she made so much food, but I'm ain't complaining!" He flagged over Amajiki, who just walked into the breakroom. "Hey, Amajiki! Join us!"

"T-thanks…." He shuffled over and eyed the spread of food on the table. "Um… Kirishima… was yesterday a special day or something for the two of you?"

"No, I don't th-WAIT" Kirishima had a moment of panic before checking his phone. "Nope. Our anniversary isn't for another few months, and her birthday was last month." He sighed in relief. "Man, Jiki, you can't do that to me. You bout gave me a heart attack." He took a bite of food. "Why'd ya ask anyways?"

"Well… it's just… this is a lot of food... And very...v-very… specific food that doesn't seem to go together, in a traditional sense…" The quiet man commented.

"What do ya mean?" 

Fatgum took a second look at the food before his eyes went wide. "I-I think I see where you're going with this Sun.." He put down his bowl while his redhead appearance just looked cluelessly between the two. "So Red, what happened last night?"

"Nothing really. I came home, and she made this awesome food, we ate, watched a few movies and then went to bed." He shrugged his shoulders.

"Did she say anything about her day, or did she seem like she wanted to talk to you about something?"

"No. I mean, she said she had an awesome day but didn't really say what was so awesome about it. She looked great! Like… I don't know, she just… had this.. glow? Yeah, that's the word. She just seemed to be glowing! I mean, I'm not saying she wasn't attractive before! She's drop-dead gorgeous, but I don't know, here recently she's just been…. Wow…" Kirishima's features softened as he thought of his wife while Fat and Amajiki looked at each other. The older man's eyes lit up while the younger dark hair man gave a half-smile. 

"H-has she been feeling ok?" Amajiki pressed.

"Yea-" He paused for a moment. "Well, she did say she wasn't feeling too good the other day and that she went to the doctor... She didn't say what they said, though.." He crossed his arms while he thought back. "Now that I think about it, she really didn't eat much last night, and I could have sworn I heard her throwing up this morning... But she  just brushed it off when I asked about it…"

"Did she say what she thought was w-wrong?"

"No, she didn't. I even asked her if she wanted me to stay home with her today, but she said she'd be fine. She did promise me she'd take it easy." He almost jumped up. "You guys don't think she's getting sick, do you? I know there's been a stomach bug going around…"

"Oh, it sounds like she got bitten by a bug, alright!" Fat couldn't keep it in any longer as he gave the redhead a wide smile.

"Seriously? What do we do? Wouldn't the doctors have found out if she did? Do you think it was poisonous?!?!" Kirishima jumped up like he was ready to take off back home to tend to his 'sick' wife.

"Easy Red." Fat roared with laughter. "She'll be fine, but she's going to be feeling the effects of this for the next…. I'd say nine-ish months…."

"Huh?" 

"Kirishima, I think you r-really need to go home and talk to your wife…" Amajiki interjected while Fat wiped the tears from his eyes, trying to control his laughter. Which he was failing at btw. 

"Come on, guys! I'm freaking out here! Is (Y/N) ok?" The hero pleased with them trying to get a straight answer.

"Eijirou?" Every head in the room twisted in your direction as you stood in the doorway. 

"(Y/N)! You're here! Are you ok? You haven't seen any weird spiders or anything around, right?" Kirishima rushed over to you as you made your way into the breakroom. You'd heard Fatgum laughing from down the hall and figured your husband was too far away. 

"Spiders? Wait, what?"

"Fatgum thinks you might have been bitten by a bug! How are you feeling? Do you need a doctor?"

"Honey. Sweetie. I'm fine, I've already talked to the doctor." You chuckled as you tried to soothe your frazzled husband. 

"You have? That's great! What did they say?"

"Well…" You trailed off. This wasn't going as planned. Your plan was to visit him in his office and surprise him with the little gift bag in your hand; from there, you hopped, he'd get the picture. The top item was a cute little 'I'm a riot' Red Riot baby onesie you in the merch store down the street. The next was a mini-set of red baby crocs. If he didn't get it at that point across, your last resort was the medical report from the doctor's office, showing that you were, in fact, pregnant. You made sure to highlight it, just to be safe. 

"I'm afraid you're just going to have to be blunt about it (Y/N). He's really not getting it. Congratulations btw the way!" Fatgum was chuckling slightly still as he scratched the back of his head sheepishly.

"S-sorry if we mess anything up…" Amajiki mumbled apologetically.

"Thanks! And don't worry about Amajiki, it's fine! This works out better anyway!" You smiled over at the two before turning your attention back to the love of your life. 

"Congratulations? Wait, what don't I get? Babe, please tell me what's going on". The worry in his eyes nearly broke your heart. 

"Honey" You grabbed his face with both hands and made him look you right in the eyes. "I'm pregnant."

His body stilled, and his eyes were wide. He just stood there staring at you for the longest time; you swear you could almost see the little hamster in his head go flying off its wheel and pinball around his skull.

"Eiji? Did you hear me?" No response. He didn't even seem to be breathing. "I think I might have broken him." You glanced over to the older man in yellow before returning to those crimson orbs.

You were honestly starting to get worried at this point. Was he just shocked? Was he happy... or... did he not want it? Finally, though, he seems to come back to his senses. 

Blink. Blink Blink. Deep breath in. Blink. Blink. Deep breath out.

"Y-Your…..preg...p-pregnant….."

"Yes. I'm pregnant." You choked a little up as it finally seemed to sink into that thick lovable skull of his. However, his expression didn't waver, and you still couldn't tell whether he was happy or not. 

"I'm… going to be a dad?" You could feel him start to tremble beneath your hands.

On no.. he doesn't... 

Your eyes started to water, but you try to keep your smile in place. "Y-yes. You are..".

"I'm going to be a… dad?" It was taking everything you had not to break down then and there

But then.. it happened. 

You watched as his face lit up with the biggest grin you had ever seen. His eyes glistened with tears until they streamed down his cheeks. "I'M GOING TO BE A DAD!!!!" Your pretty everyone on the whole floor heard his declaration, and before you knew it, you were being dragged into a tight hug and swung around the room. 

For the next hour, the two of you laughed, cried, and went around the ENTIRE building so your husband could tell everyone the news.  Afterward, you showed him your little gifts, and that caused another trip around the building so he could show off the baby items and, much to your embarrassment, the test results. 

Fatgum quickly realized that nothing else on the planet would get the red headed hero to focus on work right now, so he let him have the day off to celebrate.

After a round of visiting and phone calls to friends and family, the two of you were finally home. The moment the two of you were in your home, he pulled you to your bedroom for the most intense cuddle section you had ever had. 

"I'm... going to be a dad…" He whispered while gently rubbing your belly where.

"Yes. Yes, you are." You couldn't help but grin and give him a slow sweet kiss, which he gladly returned. 

"God, I love you so much…"

"I love you too. "

"Promise me one thing…"  Suddenly his gaze narrowed as he looked you in the eyes with a serious expression. 

"Anything…" You shifted, a little nervous in his abrupt mood change.

"If... If.." He swallowed hard. 

"What's wrong, sweetie?" Now you were worried. 

"If I'm ever that stupidly dense again, please, PLEASE, knock some sense into me!" You burst into a fit of laughter while he just pokes his lip out in a pout. "I'm serious! Get someone, anyone to knock me into next week! Tetsu, Bakugou, Hell call Midoriya! After everything I missed, I deserve a Detroit smash upside the head!"

Thanks for the read! If you want see the other stuff I’ve done, click the link bellow!

MasterList

[maandags]

Requests are open!!! *does an excited hoppy dance* oh my goodness the excitement. May I suggest a) something with Matt Holt, perhaps in an au with some sort of power (like a demigod or witch or ATLA au, etc.) or b) something for HTTYD with no pairing and plenty of dragon presence! Bonding/interacting with dragons, etc. Thankyouthankyouthankyou you are such an amazingly skilled author and making requests like this is a very special privilege. Thank you for sharing your writing :)

it’s Capture the Flag day at Camp Halfblood, and nobody lets you forget it.

of course, the nervous jitters get to you, as well. you’re not immune, even though you’ve never been a particular lover of the game. but it’s Camp tradition, and Camp Halfblood is your home, so you’ll fuck up your friends (and not-so-friends) every once in a while to keep things interesting. sure.

it’s Hephaestus, Demeter, Ares,  Apollo -- that’s you -- against Athena, Aphrodite, Hermes, and Dionysus. you’re not worried about Dionysus’ kids -- their heart isn’t in the game, and it’s easy to tell. Athena and Hermes are the ones who will pose an actual problem, you suspect. 

as you get ready, fingers making quick work of the straps on your breastplate, swinging your quiver over your shoulder (holding blunt-tipped arrows -- so they’ll still hurt like a bitch, but won’t do serious damage); strapping on your bracer, then pulling on your leather glove. you reach for your helmet, fighting the urge to roll your eyes at the red plume sticking out of it. it’s tradition, Y/N.

“you think you’re gonna win today, L/N?”

you squint up at the boy decked out in full Capture the Flag regalia, a sword at his side and a knife strapped to his thigh, brown hair mussed and glasses slightly askew on his nose. “half your team aren’t fighters, Matt. not like you and I am.” you lean back, cross your arms. “let’s just say I’m not disliking my chances, here.”

Matt shakes his head with a grin. “we’re going to crush you.”

“HOLT!” both of you whip around to the source of the voice -- it belongs to a tall Hermes kid, one of the only campers older than Matt and you, standing with his hands on his hips, glaring intensely at his teammate. “stop fraternizing with the enemy!”

Matt snickers, then bows. “well. I guess duty calls. I’ll see you after we win the game.”

“you’re so full of shit.”

“I love you, too.”

as he turns, you shout after him, “I’ve got an arrow with your name on it, Holt!”

the team captains convene -- Matt’s sister Pidge, on one side, and an Ares kid named Tyler on yours. the flags are hidden, everyone moves to their side of the creek. as you walk, Tyler and Keith, a Hephaestus kid, go through the battle plan one more time. you’ve heard it countless times before, so you listen with one ear. 

Tyler points to you. “Y/N, up in the trees. slow ‘em down as much as you can.”

“always, boss.”

“don’t get distracted by brown-haired sons of Athena,” Keith quips with a grin.

without missing a beat, you reply, “as long as you don’t get distracted by blue-eyed sons of Aphrodite, fuckwad.” Keith goes red and shoves his middle finger in your face, so you respond in kind.

“guys,” Tyler says, sounding both annoyed and tired and resigned, “focus, please.”

some obscene gestures and mouthed insults later, you’re stationed up in your tree, standing on a sturdy branch, bow at the ready, an arrow nocked. (special arrows. Keith helped out with this; you’ve got some stinkbombs, some explosive arrows, some sticky ones... they’re nasty. you can’t wait to use them.) you’ve tied yourself to the tree by your waist, having made the mistake of not doing so in the past and paying the price with bruises and cuts.

the horn sounds. the game’s begun.

border duty isn’t the most exciting part of the game. if you were a close-range fighter, you would have killed to be in the scouting group, or the flag-capturing group. but you’re not, so a spot up in the trees it is.

after a couple minutes, you spot the group of campers charged with capturing the actual flag leap over the creek like cheetahs, splitting up into two groups immediately after crossing over into the other side. despite everything, your heart rate speeds up, just a bit. your grip on the nocked arrow tightens. 

then, out of the depths of the forest in front of you, three campers race towards your side of the creek. trying to go fast, while also being quiet. heh. not if you have anything to say about it.

you bring your bow up to your face and aim, loosing it almost immediately. elegantly. effortlessly, as Matt would say. it sinks into the earth in front of the nearest camper with a dull thud, and a split second later it explodes, sending dirt and loose branches and leaves everywhere. 

before the three campers can do anything to react, you’ve let loose another arrow. this one, when it explodes, poofs out a cloud of thick red smoke, which rises high above the treetops. could just as well have been a flare. stealth mission? not so much.

but you’ve given yourself away, now. not that it matters much, now. worth it. 

“FUCK YOU, Y/N!” that’s Lance. son of Aphrodite, one of the few who is actually invested in the game. (a little too invested, in your opinion.) 

you blow him a kiss, send him a wave. “I love you, too!”

Lance yanks his fellow campers up, shakes his fist up at you. “you play dirty!”

“I’ve been here for eleven years, Lance. I deserve to play a little dirty.”

at that, Lance laughs. you narrow your eyes. “eleven years, huh?” he grins. “still can’t recognise a simple distraction?”

“what are you –” you cut yourself off, cursing, whirling around, only just managing to spot a head of brown hair zipping through the trees. 

before you realise you’re doing it, you’ve already drawn another arrow. this time, as you pull it back, you breathe out, relaxing, concentrating on the tiny shifts of movement you can still see through the trees. behind you, Lance is still shouting – “he’s gone, Y/N, we’ve outsmarted you, just admit it, you’re gonna lose –” but you drown him out. 

you let the arrow fly, and a whole second later there’s the unmistakable “augh!” of someone who just ate shit. (tangling arrow: its impact triggers the uncoiling of a spool of iron thread, hopelessly tangling the target’s legs.) 

you throw Lance a glance over your shoulder. he throws up his hand. “for the GODS’ SAKES, Y/N.” 

“do not,” you say, lips curling into a grin when you spot your group of flag-catchers, three strong, approaching from the other side of the river, the silver Athena banner rippling between them, “underestimate a child of Apollo.” 

Keith and Tyler are being chased by a growing group of blue-plumed campers, but you know it’s no use; those two are fast bastards. for the fun of it, you send another exploding arrow towards the pursuers’ ankles. the dull pop! and consequent yelps make you grin.

Keith takes a final leap over the creek and skids to a halt on the other side. the banner shifts in his hand, from silver to blood-red. 

he holds it above his head, and you let out a loud whoop before sticking two fingers in your mouth and letting out an insanely loud, piercing whistle.

the game is over. you’ve won.

you descend from your tree, dropping the last five feet to the ground, shaking your head at the mob of campers who’ve hoisted Keith and Tyler upon their shoulders and are jumping up and down. you cross your arms.

“fucking eh. I really thought we had you this time.” 

an arm drapes itself around your shoulders, and you grin, shooting a glance up at your boyfriend. “I told you I had an arrow with your name on it.” 

“you did. I’ll outrun you eventually.” Matt dips down, presses a kiss to your cheek. 

“pfft. good luck with that. you almost fooled me this time, though,” you add, poking his side. “almost.” you look down at his red-streaked legs. his knees are also scraped and slightly bloody, but his eyes are twinkling with mirth. “sorry about your ankles.”

he sighs. “yeah. I think I’ll need someone to carry me back to camp.” 

you shake your head again with a chuckle, leaning your head on his shoulder. “you’re so full of shit.”

[backtothestart02]

Just Best Friends - 6/? | westallen fanfiction

A/N: This chap’s a little shorter, but the end of the angst is just around the corner! And the following chaps should be back to normal length. I hope you enjoy. :)

...

Chapter 6 -

Barry sped straight home after his…interlude with Iris.

More like an explosion, he thought. Interlude was putting it nicely.

He had done pretty well keeping Joe out of the loop so far, at least as far as the cheating was concerned. He’d come up with one excuse after another that surprisingly the older man had bought. It even got to the point where they could hang out, watch movies, whatever, and Joe wouldn’t question him about what happened just a few weeks ago the night Iris almost slept over.

And while he didn’t know if he’d be spilling that particular news tonight, he wouldn’t be surprised if it came up. He supposed to was his own fault Iris found out he was the Flash. He really shouldn’t have let her kiss him, and he shouldn’t have kissed her back. But even after Linda had totally rocked his world, and he’d still been bitter at Iris, due to their conversation, he found he couldn’t resist Iris even if he tried, even if she didn’t realize who she was really kissing.

He should’ve known the familiarity of his kissing style would’ve been a red flag.

Did that mean he was predictable and so would be a boring kisser if they had gotten together?

He supposed he’d never know now. Now that Iris knew he was the Flash, she wouldn’t be kissing him in or out of the suit ever again.

But Joe needed to know that she knew. It was late. Past 11. But Barry couldn’t wait until morning. He’d probably get an earful from the man, but he knew it was what he deserved. He also needed advice on what to do next, and he knew he’d get it. That was the important part. The outcome. He could deal with Iris the next day. If she didn’t go home immediately and tell Eddie, of course. That would be even more problematic, given Eddie’s opinion of the Flash in the past.

He tried not to think about that.

Finally arriving in the house, he sped to the top of the stairs and started calling for Joe. He flung open his bedroom door, expecting to find him in bed, but he wasn’t there.

“Joe?”

“I’m down here, Barry.”

Barry sped downstairs and found Joe walking out of the kitchen. He frowned.

“What are you still doing up?”

Joe took a sip out of the coffee mug he was holding.

“I woke up hungry, so I decided to come down for a snack and some warm milk.”

“Oh.”

Joe’s brows furrowed together.

“Why are you in your Flash suit? Out patrolling?”

“Uh…no. I…went to see Iris actually.”

His eyes widened. It was clear he didn’t know what was going on, but he sensed something was wrong.

“Barry…”

He took a deep breath.

“She knows I’m the Flash, Joe.”

“What?!” He nearly dropped his mug. Carefully, he set it down. “You told her?”

“No!” Barry took a few steps back. “Of course not! I told you I wouldn’t!”

“Then, how? How do you know that she knows? Were you not…vibrating your voice?”

“No, I was! I’m always careful.”

Joe was clearly aggravated.

“What aren’t you telling me, Barry? How does Iris know?”

“She pushed my cowl back when we were… When we…” He froze.

“When you were what?” he demanded.

Barry gulped. “When we were kissing,” he said timidly.

Joe’s eyes widened again.

“Oh.”

“Yeah…”

“I didn’t know you two were…as the Flash, I mean.”

“We weren’t! She left a message on her blog, saying she wanted to meet. I thought she wanted to talk, not…make out.”

“You made out?” Joe scrunched up his nose. He had not been prepared for this discussion, clearly.

“…yeah.” Barry held his breath. “Sorry. It’d just been so long since-”

“Wait, since? You’ve made out with her before? As, as…Barry?”

Barry’s mouth ran dry. Before he could recover to say another word, the front door slammed open, and in walked Iris.

“Oh, good,” she said bitterly. “I’ve caught you red-handed.”

She looked Barry up and down, and he had a nasty feeling she was not checking him out.

“Iris!” he said, shocked and unnerved. She wasn’t supposed to be here. “What are you doing here?”

“Demanding answers!” She came in and shut the door behind her. Barry tensed. Joe watched her warily. “From both of you.”

Barry gulped, and Iris sat down.

“Go on. I’m waiting.”

“I think I deserve some answers first,” Joe said, approaching her.

Iris narrowed her eyebrows.

“That’s ballsy. You two have been keeping this secret from me, since when? Months? Almost a year? What have I possibly not told you?”

“How about when you and Barry made out?”

Her eyes shot daggers at Barry, who only made a slight attempt to avoid her gaze.

“Well, aren’t you full of surprises tonight,” she spat.

“You can’t tell Eddie I’m the Flash, Iris.” Barry stepped forward.

“Why not? I’m already keeping one lie from him. I’m not keeping another.”

“That was your choice. I told you to tell him.”

She got to her feet. “He would’ve broken up with me if I had!”

“Wait,” Joe interjected. “Eddie doesn’t know you cheated on him with Barry?” Iris’ lips thinned. “I need to sit down.”

Joe pulled out a chair at the table. It screeched, but he didn’t take notice of it. His head fell in his hand as he fought to process all the information he’d just been given.

“Listen, I didn’t come here to talk about…that. I came to talk about the fact that my best friend has been lying to me for months. How long have you known, Dad? Since the beginning?”

“Just about,” Barry answered for him reluctantly.

Iris’ eyes shot daggers at her supposed best friend.

“He just wanted you to be safe, Iris. That’s why we didn’t tell you. But believe me…I wanted to. You were the first person I wanted to tell!”

“Wait, wait, wait.” She held up her hands. “Let me get this straight.” She looked at her dad. “You told him not to tell me?”

“Didn’t you hear what I said, Iris?” Barry tried to step between them. “He just wanted to keep you safe! He thought you knowing could’ve put you in danger.”

“Bullshit.” She looked around Barry towards her father again. “If I had known, instead of being in the way, I could’ve been prepared to be out of the way, helping you guys put the bad guys away instead of some…damsel in distress every time a damn meta came to attack the Flash.”

“I thought of that, Iris,” Joe finally said. “Of course I did! Every time you wrote about the Flash on your blog, and-”

“This isn’t just about that, Dad!” she finally admitted. “You knew how Barry felt about me for God knows how long, and you didn’t tell me that either!”

Barry and Joe were both shell-shocked she’d brought that up. She didn’t want to talk about the cheating, but she wanted to talk about…that?

“That wasn’t his secret to tell, Iris,” Barry said.

Joe nodded. “Exactly. I would’ve never-”

“And you,” Iris directed her next accusation at Barry. “You waited fifteen years to tell me how you felt. You waited until I was in a relationship!”

Barry couldn’t look at her. His head fell, and his shoulders slumped. All he could do was nod.

“I…I know.”

“You want to know why I didn’t leave Eddie for you? Because of that! You have no care in the world about what telling me something like that would do to me. I was fine before you told me. Eddie and I were fine. We were better than fine. We were perfect. And now…” She shook her head. “Now everything is wrong, and he doesn’t know why. And I can’t tell him!”

Joe and Barry stayed silent, not knowing what to say.

“God, I can’t even look at you two.”

She turned to leave, and Barry finally summoned the strength to say something and take a few steps toward her.

“Iris, wait.”

Her hand on the doorknob, she turned to look at him.

“Don’t worry, Barry. I won’t tell Eddie you’re the Flash.” She glanced over at Joe. “At least not tonight.”

She swung the door opened, stepped outside, and closed the door tightly behind her. Barry waited until he heard her car start and then speed down the block before turning to Joe.

“What do we do?”

…

Still shaking with rage, Iris took the long way home, hoping beyond hope that by the time she reached the outside door at Eddie’s apartment building, at least she would be visibly under control. For the most part, it worked. She focused on Eddie and how much she loved him, and their little life together. And how one day it could be something even more beautiful and promising…if she could just get her act together and forget about that night with Barry, which had only been renewed by her brief making out with the Flash tonight.

Barry was the Flash.

How had she not seen it? And that ridiculous little crush she’d developed on the scarlet speedster, the streak, she’d actually developed on Barry? They were one and the same. It was unnerving, and it would take her even longer to digest that than the fact that she was still so turned on around him. In fact, she’d been willing to bet that if it had been just her dad in the room tonight, she’d have been slightly bit calmer.

But only slightly.

Because truly, she had every right to be upset, and she couldn’t wait to see what both men did to make it up to her.

But the rest of tonight was about Eddie. As it should have always been from the beginning.

Pulling the keys from the ignition, she got out of the car, and walked up to the building. The outside door was still unlocked, as per usual, so she easily got inside. Needing to use the key on their actual apartment door was no problem this time, because she had the key with her. She opened the door easily after turning the key in the lock and stepped inside.

“Eddie?” she called out, when she didn’t see him in the living room or kitchen.

There was no response, but she could hear something being moved around in their bedroom. She tried not to focus on the fact that he’d deliberately ignored her and strutted with purpose into the adjoining room.

“Eddie, I…called for you.” She frowned, her face scrunching up together. There was an open suitcase on the bed, and Eddie was…filling it.

“Oh, sorry,” he said, sarcastically. “I couldn’t hear you.”

She doubted that, but let it slide.

“It’s alright.” She started to approach him to lean in for a kiss, but he sidestepped her. “Why are you packing? Are we going on vacation?”

She could use a good vacation honestly. A place away from Barry and her dad and the Flash. Just her and Eddie, a place to reconnect. Her boss probably wouldn’t admit the last minute calling in for several days off, but he would just have to deal. He depended on her too much for Flash business to just be let go on a last minute such as this.

Unfortunately, it was not what Eddie had in mind.

“Nope,” he said, pulling out some more clothes from his dresser drawer. “How was your fuck?”

She stilled, remembering now the reason she’d left their home a couple hours prior.

“I…uh…couldn’t go through with it,” she said, hoping that would put him at ease.

“Aww, that’s too bad,” he said, not sounding like he felt that way at all. It kind of stung for Iris actually. “I hope you’re not expecting getting any from me anymore tonight. I’m kind of tapped out, honestly.”

“No, I…I wasn’t.”

“Good. Because I’m on my way out anyway.”

She’d had enough of this. She needed answers and fast. Was he leaving her? What was going on?

“Eddie, stop.”

She grabbed his wrist, which surprisingly made him come to a stop.

“What?” he asked, impatiently. “I have to go in-”

“Go where? And why am I not coming with you? What’s going on?”

He pursed his lips, then inevitably decided he was indeed going to give her an explanation.

“I didn’t like the way you left tonight to go fuck someone else, Iris.”

“Eddie, I-”

He held up his hand to stop her speech.

“I know, I know. I gave you permission, and it’s great that you didn’t go through with it for whatever reason.”

“Because I love you,” she said, thinking how that sounded like a pretty damn good reason and way better than the actual one.

“Right,” he said, and it sounded like he didn’t buy it. Was it possible he doubted her feelings for him now? She’d been so careful… And she did still love him. Right?

“Well, whatever the reason, the fact that you intended to go out and do it in the first place really rubbed me the wrong way. I was really hoping you’d just stay, because really, did I sound like I wanted you to go when I gave you permission to?”

She thought about it for a second, recalled the memory and then hung her head glumly.

“No.”

And she’d known it at the time. She’d just been so desperate to get Barry out of her system that she figured sex with anyone else she was attracted to would work just as well. Little did she know, Barry was…

Well, forget that.

“But you went anyway.”

She sighed. “Eddie-”

He moved away from her to continue packing.

“There’s a convention in Star City that I’ve been wanting to attend for quite some time. It’s a week long, and it starts tomorrow morning at 8am sharp. I have to leave like…10 minutes ago if I want to get there on time.”

Iris frowned.

“How come you never told me about it?”

He shrugged. “Something has been feeling off between us recently, so I wanted to focus on us. I wasn’t gonna go. I got approval from Singh earlier this week, just in case I changed my mind, but until you left tonight, I hadn’t planned to actually leave.” He paused and took a breath. “I just…I think we need some time apart.”

Her jaw dropped.

“Are you breaking up with me?”

He stilled, then came to her, grasping her hands in his own.

“No. No. I am not breaking up with you.”

She couldn’t figure out if she was relieved or not by that re-assurance.

“But, we’ve been spending a lot of time together, Iris. A lot. And I’ve loved it, but I don’t think it’s been good for…you.”

“Eddie, that’s not-”

“Plus, I do still think you need to work things out with Barry.”

She sighed. “That’s not gonna happen. We got into another fight tonight. That’s why I was gone so long. Actually, with my dad too.”

Eddie frowned, his entire demeanor shifting.

“Do you want to-”

She waved him off.

“No, I don’t want to talk about it.” She took a breath. “I’m sorry, but it won’t help.” She licked her lips. “I’m just telling you because what I need right now is to be away from them, not trying to work things out. I need space from them, not you.”

She tried to encircle his neck, but after a moment he grabbed her hands and brought them back down by her sides. She frowned.

“That may be the case, Iris, but a week is a long time. Maybe in a few days you’ll feel differently.”

“Eddie.”

He zipped up his suitcase, now fully packed. He grabbed a hold of the handle and heaved it off the bed.

“If you still want to be in this relationship when I get back-”

“Of course I will. How can you even-”

“If you still want to be in it,” he said again. “And we’re still having problems after I’ve been back a few days, maybe we can…go to couple’s counseling, or something.”

She was reluctant to respond to that.

“You think we need it?”

He tried not to sigh.

“I hope we don’t. But if you fix things with your dad and Barry and we’re still having problems, I think it’s our only option left. Other than breaking up, of course.”

“I would never want to break up with you, Eddie. Never.”

“And I don’t want to break up with you either, Iris. But something’s gone wrong. I can feel it.”

She sighed, taking the cheek kiss he initiated as he walked past her.

“I’ll be back in a week.”

“I love you!” she called out to him, but he was already halfway out the door and didn’t respond.

She blew a lock out of her face and fell onto their made-up bed.

“Damn it.”

…

Back at the West house, Barry had replaced Joe’s mug of milk with one of vodka and gotten himself a glass to boot. Then he sat down at the table with a weary-looking Joe and took a long gulp of the alcoholic beverage.

“I really wish I could get drunk.”

Joe took a swig of his own.

“I’m not going to with this amount, but uh…you still can’t, huh?”

Barry shook his head.

“Cisco and Caitlin have been working on a concoction since last fall, but so far their greatest masterpiece only lasts a few seconds, tops.”

Joe gripped his shoulder.

“You’ll get there, son.”

Barry forced a smile.

“I know.”

Joe set the mug down, then let his head fall into his hands again.

“Uggggh.”

Barry looked at him pathetically.

“I’m sorry, Joe. I should’ve been more…more careful…or something. I don’t know.”

Joe shook his head, still covered by his hands.

“No, it’s not your fault.” He lifted his face, still weary-looking for the whole situation. “She would’ve found out eventually. And she’s probably right, you know?”

“Yeah?”

Joe nodded. “Maybe she would’ve been safer knowing what was going on instead of being out of the loop.”

“I did try to tell you something along those lines…”

“I know, I know.” Joe waved him off. “Guess you were right then too.”

“What about Eddie?”

“I don’t think we need to worry about him. At least not for another week.”

Barry’s brows furrowed.

“You don’t think Iris will tell him first thing in the morning?”

Joe took another gulp.

“Not if he’s gone before she can.”

“I don’t…understand. He’s leaving her?”

Barry’s heart started to race.

Joe shook his head.

“Not her. Central City.”

The dots started to connect.

“For the next week, you mean?”

Joe nodded.

“At least, I’m guessing. There’s a police convention this coming week that I overheard him asking Singh off for. He wasn’t certain he was going, but it was a possibility.”

“So, he might not be going.”

“I’d say it’s fairly certain he is. It’s one he’s been looking forward to for a while.”

“Iris didn’t seem to know anything about it.”

Joe reached for the bottle of vodka.

“That’s none of our business.”

Barry slumped in his chair.

“Right.” He paused. “There is…something else you should know.”

“Oh, no.” He set the bottle down. “What now?”

Barry reached around the hack of his head to scratch awkwardly at his neck.

“Someone else knows I’m the Flash too…as of tonight.”

“Who?”

He winced. “Linda.”

“Another reporter,” Joe deadpanned. “That’s great…just…just great.”

“She does sports, Joe. I really don’t think we have anything to worry about. I made her promise not to tell anyway, and she agreed. Though she was mostly in shock about it.”

“Understandable.”

“I’ll talk to her tomorrow, make sure we’re still on the same page.”

“I thought you two weren’t even dating anymore!”

“We’re not. But uh…we ran into each other at the bar last night, and one thing led to another and-”

“Stop. Stop right there.” He held up a hand. “I already know way more about your love life tonight than I ever needed to.”

Barry swallowed and reaching for his glass again, finishing the contents.

“Right,” he said, wiping his mouth. “No more details. Got it.”

Joe sighed and leaned back in his chair.

“It does sound like you’ve got that situation under control though.”

“I do.”

“Should we try going to bed then? It looks like we’re both on empty, and there’s really nothing we can do about Iris anymore tonight?”

“Okay.” He tilted his head. “And tomorrow?”

“If Eddie really is leaving tonight, I say we give her a couple days to digest everything.”

Barry nodded. “Okay, and then what? We talk to her?”

“You talk to her.”

He frowned.

“Why just me?”

“She likes you better.”

He wanted to laugh.

“Joe, I don’t thi-”

“Trust me. She may not be a fan of you now, but I’m the one that forced you not to say anything. It may be slight, but she does like you better.”

Barry collected the glasses and deposited them in the sink. Then he put the remaining vodka away.

“Okay,” he said. “In a few days, I’ll talk to her.”

[redrobinhoods]

illicit affairs | Chapter 3, Tokyo Smoke

AO3 Link | 4,500 words (approx) | Chapter 1, Chapter 2, /end

Chapter Summary: Riyo and Fox come to terms with the limits and definition of their relationship

Riyo woke up first.

It took her a moment to remember where the weight on her torso was coming from. She hadn’t slept with another being in her bed in many years, but the last thing she remembered from last night was closing her eyes and focusing on the steady heartbeat of the man holding her. Now she found herself laying on her side with a warm body before her. She didn’t dare shift her position for fear of waking him up, but dropped her head to her chest to look down at her torso. Fox’s arms still crossed around her waist, but his forehead now lay against her chest. She took a few moments to take in the sight.

She’d dated before, back on Pantora, but dating on Pantora and dating on Coruscant were entirely different beasts. She’d been afraid that on Coruscant others would only see her for her position, and so far she’d been right in her assumptions. But Fox was different. He had seen her as a person first and a politician second, and perhaps the latter only because of the bounds of his command. She’d been worried that she may have taken advantage of him in the hospital and in her room when she’d pulled him down into her arms. But now, with his arms still wrapped around her waist in sleep, she felt at ease. She’d never considered dating one of the clones before, certainly not one belonging to the Coruscant Guard. They were supposed to be loyal only to the Republic. Then again, so was she, in a way. Loyalty to the Republic and to her people were supposed to come before all else in her life. That was the vow she had made. But this, this felt right.

She brought one hand over and lay it across his neck, feeling the raised scar tissue underneath her touch. She found herself running her fingers over one in particular, large and ragged. It had to have nearly claimed his life. She could imagine Fox lying prone on the ground as one of the other guardsmen tried to stem the flow of blood from the commander’s neck. The image scared her. She’d known that the Coruscant Guard were all flesh and blood underneath their armor, but knowing that was different than holding it in your hands.

“Some petty thief.” He muttered sleepily. “Didn’t expect them to lunge towards me.”

“Did it hurt?” She continued running her fingers over it, trying to picture the scene in her head.

“For a moment, before shock set in. I lost a lot of blood.” He said it so casually that it hurt her.

“When you saved my life, did that hurt?” The thought had been bouncing around in her head ever seen she’d glanced back at his body in the museum.

He brought one arm up so that he could lay a hand on her hips. He began tracing slow circles in the satin. “Like hell. I almost wish it had been worse so I could’ve passed out.” He looked up to see the despair on her face. “I’d do it again in a heartbeat, for you.”

“I don’t want you to be in pain because of me, Fox.” She moved her hand up from his neck and cupped his jaw, running her thumb over his cheekbones.

“It’s what I was made for, Riyo. We clones were born to die for the Republic. I’ve always been fine with that. Or I was, until last night.”

“And what happened last night?” She prodded. He pushed himself up so that his head lay on the pillow next to hers.

“Well, you see-.”

“Fox, Fox come in!” His commlink beeped from across the room. Fox sighed and pressed his forehead against Riyo’s.

“I think you should answer that.” She said, closing her eyes and leaning back against him.

“Fox, this is urgent. I know you can hear me. If you don’t answer in the next ten seconds I’m sending someone in there, Fox.”

Fox sighed again, then untangled himself from the blankets as he rose, leaving her feeling cold in his absence. “What is it, Thire?”

“Got our bounty hunter to crack. Bounty was placed by Lor Hano, a Trade Federation officer. The same one we had flagged as a potential Separatist sympathizer. He has a home on Coruscant and it’s my understanding that he’s still in town. I’m sending you the address and a squad. I suggest the boys bring the senator back to the office so they can swap shifts. Stone can keep an eye on her in the meantime.”

“Copy that, Thire.” He turned off the comm and turned back to Riyo, who was watching him from under the blankets. “Riyo, I’m sorry.”

“I understand.” She smiled up at him. “But we’re finishing this conversation later.”

“Gladly.” He took a moment to push his hair back from his face before starting to assemble his armor over his body. She sat up as she watched him pull it on, putting the pieces together with ease and familiarity; his fingers barely touching the plastoid except to press the seams together. Her eyes followed the flex of his body under the blacks, she couldn’t believe that she had been pressed against that same body just moments ago. She felt a sadness rising in her chest as he prepared to leave her.

“Fox, don’t die for me.” She begged once he had finished the rapid assembly.

He checked over his armor fitting one last time before walking over to her bed and sitting down beside her. He took her face in his hands and pressed a dry kiss to her forehead. Drawing back, he took a moment to look over her body before returning his gaze to her eyes. “I won’t lie to you and tell you that I’ll be fine, but I want you to know that if I had the choice of who I will die for, I would choose you.”

She looked at him in astonishment as she realized that this is how it would always be for them, if there ever was a them. She’d have to watch him leave every day, not knowing if he would come back to her alive. But yet, she couldn’t ask him to not go. She wondered how he felt to leave her.

“Fox, I think that I lo-.” He placed a finger over his lips before she could finish.

“Don’t say that now, wait until I get back and you have a clear head.” She pushed his hand away, holding it tight in hers.

“I have a clear head now, Fox. I’ve had a clear head for the past four days.” He shook his head, the look in his eyes begging her to stop. She didn’t. “At the museum, in the Natural Formations room when you were talking about forests and fresh air and then you almost died but you’ve barely lived and I want you to experience life. I don’t know how to put that feeling into other words than ‘I love you’. I know that it’s selfish of me to say this now, and you don’t have to love me back, but I really, really want to fall in love with you, Fox.”

He closed his eyes as a shudder ran down his body. A look of pain ran across his features and Riyo suddenly felt horrible for the timing of her confession. Fox had been right, it was torture to say this now rather than later, when she had him in her arms, safe.

“This is Lieutenant Bravo, Commander Fox we’re ready for you.”

Fox looked down to the commlink on his glove, then back at Riyo’s face. He gently withdrew his hand from hers and ran it over her collarbones, smoothing back her unbrushed hair. “I think that I would like to fall in love with you as well, Riyo.”

Before she could react, he was sweeping out of her room and she heard the front door close behind him. She was alone.

---

Riyo felt hollow as she walked through the Senate halls with her escort. It was late morning and many of the senators were already sealed away inside their offices, making the building feel as empty as she did. Her escort left her at the Guard office doors, waiting to make sure that she entered before they retired to the barracks. Commander Stone met her in the main office space, looking far more awake than she did.

"Senator Chuchi.”

“Commander Stone. A pleasure to see you again.” She smiled at the commander then looked around the office. It was quiet at the moment, many of those in the room were sleeping at their desks. Stone didn’t seem to mind, and she assumed that they must’ve been up all night.

“The pleasure is all mine. I am glad to see you under these circumstances, and I know that we will all be relieved when you are no longer under threat. Come, I’ve taken over monitoring the comms from my office. Thire was summoned by the Chancellor.” He waved her over and she followed him into a small room not unlike Fox’s. She took a seat in the chair opposite Stone and turned her attention to the computer terminal that sat against the wall. The program running on the screen was displaying the name and vital signs of each man next to the soundwaves coming from each comm on the channel. She found Fox, or CC-1010, with ease.

“This is Bravo, kitchen is clear.”

“Fox, living spaces clear.”

A crash came through Scout’s comm and his rectangle lit up. “Target located: second level, first room left. Assistance required.”

“Coming, Scout. Hang in there.”

Riyo watched in mild fascination as the terminal lit up with sound of their footfalls as the other troopers ran to assist.

“This is Commander Fox of the Coruscant Guard, Lor Hano you are under arrest for treachery against the Republic and the sedition of violence against a Republic Senator.” There was a click of handcuffs and Riyo couldn’t stop a smile from spreading across her face. “Scout, search the bedroom. Kilo, the office. The rest of you, pick a room and report to me when finished.”

The six soundwaves all synched up into footsteps and some vital signs fell back to resting levels as the adrenaline rush faded. She watched Fox’s soundwave blinking twice with the sound of both his and Hano’s footfalls. Then all the lights blinked and vanished.

“Stone?” She turned to see Stone pulling up his own comm.

“Kilo? Kilo can you hear me? Bravo, are you there? Repeat, Bravo, are you there? Fox?”

“Commander Stone!” Jek ran in, looking like he’d just woken up. He probably had. “Commander, there’s been an explosion. Ten south two east. Fire suppression team is engaging.”

“Suspected cause?”

“Hotwired thermal detonators to destroy evidence, sir. It came from the home of a Trade Federation officer we’ve been watching.” Riyo decided that he’d definitely just woken up or had just arrived at the office. She hadn’t seen him in the initial scan of the room. Then she realized what he was saying and she reached up to cover her mouth, stifling the cry rising in her throat.

“I’m going on-site. Stay here with Senator Chuchi.” Stone grabbed his helmet and blew past them, slamming the door behind him. Jek moved to take the commander’s seat across from her. He took in her expression.

“Fox is there, isn’t he?”

She nodded.

Jek reached across the desk to set a hand on Riyo’s shoulder. “I’m sure they’ll be alright, Senator. Unless he’s the one that triggered the blast, he’ll be okay. We’ve all been caught in these situations before. He’ll be pretty bruised up, but he’ll be okay.” He watched her expression for a minute before he spoke again, his voice barely a whisper. “You love him, don’t you?”

“I don’t know. Maybe? I think so.” She hiccupped. Jek rose and walked over to her side. He stood behind her and began rubbing her back as she tried to steady her breathing to match his. Once she had settled down, Jek disappeared for a moment and reappeared with a pile of face tissue, which she gladly accepted. They sat in silence afterwards; across the desk from one another with Riyo squeezing Jek’s hand. If it hurt, he didn’t say anything.

“Senator?” The door to Stone’s office slide open to reveal Commander Thire, fully armored and helmeted.

“Is he-?” She fell silent as Thire raised his hand in a ‘stop’ motion.

“They’re all fine. Hano manually set off the detonators. None of our men were incapacitated. It appears that you are free to resume your routine without the protection of the Coruscant Guard.” She wished that he’d taken off his helmet so that she could read his expression. Maybe it was as blank as his voice.

“Thank you, Commander Thire, for all you and the Guard have done for me.” She rose and extended her hand. After a moment’s hesitation, he took it and gave her the most formal handshake she had ever had, and as a senator she was accustomed to them.

“It’s our duty, Senator Chuchi.”

“You didn’t come here to tell the Senator that she’s free to go, did you, sir?” Jek asked. He looked puzzled, and Riyo wondered if her gut feeling about the commander acting strangely formal was shared by Jek.

“The Chancellor requests your presence, Senator. I am to escort you to his office. Jek, go get some rest.” His voice softened when addressing his brother. Jek looked like he was about to argue, then thought better of it.

She followed Thire out of the office and into the halls of the Senate. It was still empty. She took advantage of the stillness to take a long look at the clone beside her without worry of bumping into another senator or representative. At first glance he seemed fine, but on closer inspection she noticed the slight shaking in his legs and how his fingers twitched.

“Commander, are you okay?” He didn’t respond, keeping his gaze forward. “Thire?” She prodded.

“Lor Hano is dead. He was standing under the detonator when it went off.” He didn’t turn to face her as he spoke.

“But you said that he’s the one that set it off, why wouldn’t he detonate it after he was out of the building?” She couldn’t read his body language; she could always read the clone’s body language.

“I don’t know. Fox is fine.”

“Wasn’t Commander Fox escorting Hano when the explosion went off?”

Thire’s head cocked slightly towards her. “Yes, I suppose he was thrown clear of the debris.” He spoke like he was trying to remember a dream. Riyo was close to tearing the helmet off his head when they arrived at the door to the Chancellor’s office. The two Red Guardsmen at the doors let them in, and she followed Thire to the room with the Chancellor’s desk.

“Senator Chuchi, it is a pleasure to see you.” The Chancellor swept over to greet her.

“Supreme Chancellor, the pleasure is all mine.” She took his outstretched hands and he gave them a reassuring squeeze as he escorted her to one of the lovely couches that circled his desk. She looked back to see Thire standing at attention in the doorway. When she turned back, she noticed the line of red and white standing at parade rest on her left. Each guardsman was covered in a layer of fine dust, some were stained with ash, but all of them stood completely still. She could’ve believed they were statues if it wasn’t for the subtle rise and fall of their shoulders. Fox was the furthest from her and her heart leapt at the sight.

“It is a pity that Lor Hano will not be brought to justice. However, I’m sure that a great burden has been lifted from your shoulders, Senator.” The Chancellor said as he seated himself opposite her.

“Actually, Your Excellency, the burden was lifted earlier this week by the presence of the Coruscant Guard. You should be very proud of their commitment to duty.”

“Oh, I am, Senator. I was just commending Commander Fox on his actions. I couldn’t ask for a more loyal commanding officer. He has never let me down.” Palpatine smiled fondly at the guardsmen, and Riyo felt a little more at ease. “If you will excuse me, Senator, I’m afraid that I must be going. It appears that I am needed elsewhere at this moment.”

“Of course, Your Excellency.” She bowed her head as he rose and took his leave from the room, Thire following close behind.

“Relax. You’re dismissed.” Fox said, at least, it must’ve been Fox. She turned back to the line of clones to see them come back to life. A few terse nods were given to her as the five men left the room, leaving her with Commander Fox. He raised his head slightly in her direction, and she took that as the sign for her to make the next move.

“Commander, would you mind escorting me to my office?”

“Of course not, Senator.” He said, moving to her side. They didn’t speak again until they were out of sight from the Red Guards at the Chancellor’s door.

“Are you okay?” She asked once they were away from all ears.

“A bit bruised, potentially concussed. I think I was thrown clear of the worst of the blast.”

“You think?”

“I don’t remember. I was at the foot of the stairs then Stone was pulling me out of the rubble.” He looked down to see the worry on her face. “It’s just a concussion, Riyo. We clones recover from them much faster than humans thanks to the Kaminii. I did lose my blaster though. Must’ve been knocked right out of the holster.”

Having arrived at Riyo’s office, she ushered Fox in before her, making sure that the door locked behind them. By the time she turned around, Fox had taken off his helmet and lain it on her desk, where he at perched on the edge looking over her.

“We never finished our conversation earlier.” She said, moving across the room to him.

“What a pity I can’t remember that conversation, I must’ve taken a harder hit to the head than I initially thought.” He smirked at her worried look that quickly hardened into frustrated amusement.

“You were talking about being born to die, I believe.” She raised her hand to his face, freezing midair as she took in the tiny cuts around the top of his blacks from the debris.

“Oh, yes. I don’t think I want to die. But I can’t remember the reason.” He took her hand from the air and brought it into his lap, where he held between his gloved palms.

“Is your reason a woman, perhaps?” She ventured. Two could play this game.

“Come to think of it, yes. I think I may have accidentally caught feelings for her when she was giving me the full-body pat down. Not to mention ordering me around like a shiny.”

“Are you a shiny, Commander Fox?”

“In love, very much so.” He cringed slightly after the words left his mouth, eliciting an amused smile from her. He stood up and took her face in his hands, tracing over the green arcs with his thumbs. “May I?”

She nodded fervently, forgetting how to speak. She tilted her head back as he leaned down, closing her eyes when she felt his lips begin to brush against hers. The kiss was softer than she had thought to be possible. His fingers traced over her cheeks as he moved his lips against hers, the motions restrained and calm. Her arms wrapped around his hips and pulled his body to hers. It felt so good to hold him. He pulled away all too soon. She ran her tongue around the inside of her lips after they had parted, tasting the remains of smoke and shattered drywall from the explosion that he had left on her.

“Damn.” She whispered, locking her hands behind his hips, refusing to let him pull back all the way. “I’m going to need you to do that again.”

“I’m at your service, Senator Chuchi.” He said, leaning down and finding her lips again. She fought back the urge to pull him in harder as she relaxed against him, parting her lips and letting him push deeper into her, imagining the same gentle kisses in a very different scene.

“Titles will only take us to a dark place, Commander Fox.” She purred into his mouth as he pressed his forehead to hers to take a shuddering breath.

Fox didn’t respond. He pulled her back against the desk, seating himself on the wood and pulling her onto his lap after him, wrapping his arms around her waist. He bent down and began to press the same soft kisses against her neck. She let out a deep sigh and wrapped her arms around him, running one hand through his hair. Still gentle, she was certain that he wouldn’t leave a mark. She considered asking him to bite her, or suck against the soft skin of her neck, but decided that was best saved for another occasion with another wardrobe. She couldn’t be walking around the Senate with bite marks and bruises on her neck. Someone would notice. One day, she’d dress in a high-collared shirt and let him mark her.

“I should be the one kissing you.” She sighed.

“No.” She could feel his lips move across her skin as he spoke. “You did enough last night. It’s my turn now.” He planted his lips in the crook of her neck and pulled her tighter against him. She let out a quiet moan, trying to consider where they were. She wondered how far they could get before it became too much or they were interrupted.

It turned out to be the latter, as she was startled a few seconds later by a hard knock on the door. She pressed against Fox’s shoulders, separating him from her skin.

“One moment, please.” She called.

“Senator Chuchi, your presence is requested in the Cantham House.” Said the person outside the door.

“Tell Senator Organa that I will be there shortly.” She called back. Once the footsteps had faded, she turned back to her companion. “Fox, I-.”

“Duty calls, Riyo.” He planted one quick kiss against her lips and helped her off the desk. “I understand. But we’re finishing this later.”

“My place? As soon as you can get away.” She begged.

“I’ll be there.” He promised.

---

“Where do you think you’re going?” Stone looked over the datapad he was holding to Fox’s bed, where he sat pulling on running shoes that he’d stolen long ago from undercover ops.

“I’m going out for a run.” Fox said, gesturing to the shoes.

“Are you sure that you’re not sneaking out to go back to your office?” Stone scoffed. “Thire, tell Fox he’s crazy.”

“Fox.” Fox paused to look across the room at Thire, who had been trying to sleep. "When you stand up, will you pass me the, uh, kriff, I can’t think straight.”

“Yeah, I can.” Fox tightened the shoe then walked over to the small sink the commanders shared. He filled up a nearby glass with water and grabbed the bottle on the shelf labeled ‘headache’ in bright red.

“Thank you, Fox.” Said Thire as he took the offered objects.

“I think you’re allergic to the Chancellor, Thire.” Stone teased. “You get a headache every time he calls on you.”

“The Chancellor is actually a telepathic Umbaran and he’s controlling you.” Fox shook his finger at Thire in mock agreement with Stone.

“The Chancellor is a wonderful man, you two are just old and calloused.” Thire groaned.

“He’s controlling everything, even now, he moves to destroy the Republic.” Fox shook his head at Thire as he walked backward towards the door.

“I will arrest you for treason, Fox. Go to work already.” Stone was close enough to give Fox a final shove out of the door.

There was nobody in the barracks halls to question Fox. Not that they would, he was their commanding officer and it was well known that he liked to masquerade as a civilian jogger. The light jacket he wore, also stolen from undercover ops, covered up the Republic symbol on his blacks. Of course they had a gym in the barracks, but Fox preferred the feeling of the city air on his face rather than the stale air of the track. In the past, he’d often ended his run at the Senate building, sleeping the rest of the night in his office. But now, this presented him with the perfect opportunity to meet Riyo.

She met him in the speeder lot of her apartment complex. He’d pulled the hood down as he approached and enjoyed watching the look on her face change from apprehension to joy as she ran to his arms. Her hair was down, and he ran his fingers through it as he held her to his chest.

“You scared me, Fox.” She laughed.

“Sorry, I thought this was more subtle.” He rested his head on the top of hers. Her hair smelled amazing, and he wished that he could’ve named the scent or even begun to describe it.

“Come.” She pulled back and grabbed his hand, leading him to her apartment. “How did you get away?” She asked as she turned to lock the door.

“The boys think I’m sleeping at the office.”

“Well then, let’s keep it that way.” She turned back to him and unzipped the running jacket, slipping it off his shoulders and hanging it on a waiting hook. He gasped a little as she placed her hands on his chest and she drew back quickly.

“It’s okay, it’s okay. Just a bruise. You gotta go easy on me tonight.” He pulled her back in, minding the ache across his body. “It’ll be much easier once we get the blacks off and you can see them.”

She laughed, reaching up to brush a loose strand of hair away from his face. “Is that really your best bedroom talk, Commander?”

“Probably.” He chuckled as he looked down at her. She was beautiful, and she was his. “I thought you said that titles would take us to a dark place?”

“Yes, but I plan on kissing every bruise on your body tonight.” She brought her hand down from his brow to rest it under his jaw, stroking his cheeks as he had stroked hers.

“Mm. That does sound nice.” He closed his eyes and leaned into the gesture, letting all of the day’s tension drain out of him. The apprehension of last night was gone, replaced by hard resolve. He had sworn an oath- a decision that he had had no control over- to the Republic, to protect the Republic, to die for the Republic. And he would keep that oath, loyal to his last breath. Because the Republic wasn’t the Chancellor or the Senate building, it was the people. Riyo was the Republic, and he would ruin himself a million times for her.

[deadlyanddelicate]

Could you maybe do something like Adam and Ronan hanging out with Blue and Gansey near the beginning of their relationship and Ronan marvelling at how he actually gets to hold Adam's hand now and it feels too good to be true 🥺

dear anon... i’m so sorry. this spiralled from the intended 500 words of cute hand holding to 2500 words of group dynamics. i have no excuse. hopefully there is still enough hand-holding to fit the bill 😅

since this got long-ish, you can also find it over at my AO3 if you prefer to read there!

and at every table, i’ll save you a seat

adam/ronan, fluff, 2.5k. takes place after the main events of trk but before the trk epilogue.

“I’m just saying, if he starts shit, I’m gonna walk out. I don’t need that drama in my life right now.” Ronan huffed, pacing back and forth on the sidewalk, hands shoved deep into his leather jacket pockets. His breath condensed in the cold early December air. “Noted,” Adam replied, with the patient tone of someone who had heard the threat before and was not particularly concerned.

Ronan glowered - not at Adam or at anyone in particular, he just glowered. He did mean it. He couldn’t be fighting with Gansey right now, he just couldn’t.

Technically, they were already in a fight. This was new: historically, it was Adam and Ronan snarking at each other until one of them snapped, much to Gansey’s great exasperation; or Adam and Gansey waging cold war at each other until Ronan got tired of it and did something purposefully outrageous just so they’d get mad at him and forget whatever argument they were having. It usually wasn’t Ronan and Gansey. But then Ronan had dropped out of school.

The argument that had followed hadn’t been big and explosive, but rather drawn out into instalments: interrupted before things could get too bad and then picked up again at a different time, with Gansey pleading and needling and insisting graduation was mere months away. Ronan had endured a week of this before dealing with it the only way he could conceive of: by moving himself out of Monmouth and back into the Barns, which had been the plan anyway.

Adam had been a quiet bystander in this. He did not approve of Ronan dropping out, and it was clear in the tight line of his mouth when Ronan had told him. But he had always been good at picking his battles, and he had clearly decided not to fight Ronan’s for him. “Are you sure?” he had asked, looking at Ronan with narrowed blue eyes that, as usual, saw far too much. “Yeah,” Ronan had replied. In all honesty, he hadn’t exactly thought it through, because he could not think it through right now - but that was exactly why he was dropping out. He couldn’t be around people. He couldn’t be expected to function and show up and act like an engaged student and study for exams after– everything. So he said again, “Yeah.” And Adam had nodded, and that had been that.

Of course Gansey, correctly guessing that Adam would disapprove of anyone giving up on education, had tried to gain access to his – recently increased - leverage, but his efforts had fallen flat as far as Ronan could tell.

“But you must realise it’s a mistake”, he’d said on the only occasion Ronan had been witness to, one time when he’d arrived early to pick Adam up from work. “Don’t tell me you agree with him!”

“I don’t, but it’s his mistake to make,” Adam had replied, his annoyance clear even from Ronan’s sightless spot around  the corner of Boyd’s main entrance. “Leave him alone, Gansey. Just because your friends want different things from you doesn’t mean they’re not your friends anymore.”

God, but Ronan loved him.

There had been a long pause filled with Gansey’s chastised silence. This wasn’t solely about Ronan’s choices, and they all knew it.

After that, Gansey’s tactical maneuvers had stopped, but Ronan still hadn’t really spoken to him since dropping out, which was less a hostile decision and more due to Ronan not being in school and refusing to answer his phone. When he left the Barns, it was to spend the night at St. Agnes or go for a long drive with Adam, who knew better than to try to play peacemaker on those occasions.

But now it was Gansey’s birthday, and Blue had summoned them at Nino’s, and apparently would never ever speak to him again if he did not show up. So, whatever, fine. It’s not like Ronan would ever miss Gansey’s birthday anyway. He wasn’t that shitty of a  friend. He just didn’t want any drama.

“I’m just saying he needs to lay off,” he added, defensive.

“Fine,” Adam rolled his eyes. “Now are you gonna stop being a big baby?” he held out his hand for Ronan to take. “We’ve been out here for ages. Let’s go inside, I’m cold.”

“Now who’s being a big baby,” Ronan shot back, but took Adam’s hand anyway. He couldn’t help the little electric thrill that went through him at the sensation of skin on skin. It had been almost a month now since he and Adam had gotten together, since their first kiss on Ronan’s birthday, and he still wasn’t used to the idea of this being offered so casually, like something he could just have. Because he could just have it now.

They walked into Nino’s to see Blue waving at them energetically to signal her position. There was no need for it, of course, because she was sitting at the same booth they always sat in. “God, so dramatic,” Ronan moaned, rolling his eyes dramatically. “Ain’t that the truth,” Adam commented, his lips tilting into a smirk. Ronan gave his hand a little squeeze.

Blue, satisfied with her flagging-down antics, had sat back down, and now was placidly nestled into Gansey’s side, looking like one of those small angry birds who puff up and tuck their head into their body until they’re perfectly round. On Gansey’s other side, perusing the menu intently as if it didn’t have the same 12 choices as always, was Henry Cheng, his hair looking like an abstract painting and his t-shirt screaming out a Kylie Minogue logo.

And Gansey himself looked… the same as usual, which was to say, it was both impossible to tell and impossible to forget that he had died and been resuscitated in the past month. He also looked anxious. That, Ronan mused, was also usual. He just didn’t usually look anxious about greeting Ronan, and Ronan wasn’t sure he liked that. He chewed on his lip, then gave Gansey a reluctant half smile and hoped it didn’t look like too much of a snarl. Gansey also gave a half smile that looked like a gastritis grimace.

Progress.

“Hey y’all,” Adam greeted. “Hi Blue. Cheng,” he nodded. Then he turned towards Gansey, starting to raise his right fist reflexively; he paused, looked briefly down at where his left hand was joined with Ronan’s, then seemed to make a split-second decision and raised that hand instead, curling his fingers into a fist around Ronan’s, making it so they both fist-bumped Gansey at once. It was embarrassing and looked silly and awkward, but somehow, afterwards, Ronan didn’t feel quite so tentative, and Gansey’s grimace was more and more reminiscent of a smile.

“Very fucking clever,” he muttered in Adam’s ear as they slid into the booth.

“I know, right?” Adam replied with a cheery smile. “I should be a counsellor or something.”

Ronan shoved his shoulder into Adam’s good-naturedly. Adam jostled him right back. Neither let go of the other’s hand.

Immediately, they were pulled into conversation by Blue and required to arbitrate a discussion between her and Henry on whether reality shows were morally bankrupt or a fascinating social experiment. Adam, who had never watched a reality show, sided with Blue out of principle. Gansey, who for very different reasons had also never watched a reality show, was discreetly trying to pull Ronan’s focus with an entreating look; Ronan, warily, let him.

“How have you been, Lynch?” Gansey asked.

Ronan shrugged. “How have you been?”Gansey looked for a moment like he was going to lose his patience. Instead, his face cracked in a different direction, an almost melancholy expression coloring it. “Alright. Adjusting, I suppose. To… everything.”

Everything being “dying and coming back to life as a patchwork tangle of ley line forest”.

“That’s rough, man.” Ronan raised his glass sympathetically, and Gansey tilted his own back.

“You must also be… adjusting. To everything.”

Everything being losing his mother, losing Cabeswater, and almost dying himself.

The undercurrent of things unsaid, hovering just under the surface, was too much; Ronan was going to scream.

But then Gansey did the unexpected.

“I’m sorry,” he said. Ronan choked on his drink a little.

“I shouldn’t have hassled you about school. I just…” Gansey waved a vague hand.

“Think you know better than everyone?” Ronan supplied dryly. Damn, maybe Parrish was rubbing off on him.

Gansey tilted his head. “Perhaps. I made a few bad calls. I, uh. I may have sold Monmouth Manufacturing to get Child to let you stay in school.”

The words were like an ice pick in Ronan’s heart. He felt Adam’s hand tighten around his, despite the fact he was ostensibly still listening to Blue. Adam knew, then. Ronan could only imagine that argument.

“Dick. You did what?”, he rasped. “I never, ever asked you to do anything like that, you colossal fucking-”“I know, I know,” Gansey said, raising a placating hand. “It was stupid. I was maybe not thinking straight. Bit concerned with my own impending death. It’s alright. I managed to buy it back.”

The storm cloud threatening to explode in Ronan’s chest dispelled. Monmouth was safe. Monmouth, with its tall windows and its dusty floors and its walls that held a thousand stories of insomnia and grief and laughter and companionship and fights and friendship. Brotherhood.

“Good,” he said, a little hoarsely. “You love that place.”

“I do,” Gansey admitted wistfully. “It’s just been a little… well. Different. Now that it is just me, I mean. I don’t see you at school, and I don’t see you at ho– at Monmouth. And it’s a big place, and I suppose maybe I was – there is a chance that I perhaps might have been a little afraid of being… well. Lonely. I guess.”

Well. That was a low blow. Or maybe it only felt like one because Ronan had not stopped to think about that and was caught unawares now – but he was gonna go with low blow anyway. It seemed wrong for Gansey – Gansey, of all people – to be lonely. He had always been the one collecting lonely people, the glue holding them all together. Ronan had spent so much time worried about losing Gansey’s friendship, so it was a baffling change of pace for Gansey to miss him.

It made him feel a little bad, but he also knew he was doing the right thing. He needed to be at home right now - his real home, his childhood home, to process everything. And Gansey had other people now – he had Blue and he had Henry, and Ronan had Adam – well, he’d had Adam before, in a manner of speaking, but it was different now. They were both following their own paths. But it didn’t mean Ronan couldn’t be there for him.

“You can still text me, you know,” he said as casually as he could.

Gansey glared at him. “I have been.”“Really?” Ronan said even more casually, scratching at his stubble. He shrugged. “Try again,” he added, more sincerely, holding Gansey’s gaze.

Gansey gave him a small, earnest smile. “I will.”

And just like that, things were okay again. Ronan leaned over the table to give Gansey an amicable punch in the shoulder, but had to raise his right hand, still entwined with Adam’s, to reach forward. It didn’t occur to him that their joined hands were visibly resting above the table until Gansey’s eyes shot down to them and quickly away, his expression doing something complicated but not displeased. He nodded, that little unguarded smile still on his face. Approval, perhaps. Ronan had not asked for it nor did he need it – but it was still nice.

Not as nice as actually getting to hold Adam’s hand though. Now that he’d been reminded of it, he couldn’t stop focusing on it – the warmth, the contact of thumb crossed over thumb, his fingertips brushing over Adam’s still slightly chapped knuckles, the way Adam’s calluses were familiar to him now in a way he’d never expected to know outside of a dream.

Adam – who by this point was wryly arguing with Henry over whether there was even a point to a student council when everyone on it was part of the 1%, to Henry’s impassioned retorts that there are more issues than just classism, Parrish – absently shifted his hand so it was resting palm up on the table, an open invitation, a gentle suggestion to readjust. Ronan followed in kind, resting the back of his hand against Adam’s palm. Adam wrapped his long fingers around the side of Ronan’s palm – Ronan closed his fingers over Adam’s.

He felt warm all over. He took a sip of his iced tea but couldn’t hide the small, private smile playing on his lips, nor could he stop staring at their hands crisscrossed over each other’s on top of the table.

And then he was rudely snapped out of it by Blue’s teasing Awww, cute.

Ronan raised his head slowly, making sure to narrow his eyes menacingly despite the distinct heat he could feel on his cheeks.

Blue was staring at their hands, an unrepentant grin on her face. She met Ronan’s eyes without a trace of concern, taking a big, leisurely gulp of her tea.

“You got somethin’ to say, Sargent?” he asked pleasantly.

“Yeah,” she replied defiantly. “I said you guys are cute.”

This was all new terrain. Ronan had never been teased for being in a relationship, but he’d also never been in a relationship, and hell – he’d all but avoided thinking about the mere idea of a relationship until last year.

Then Adam pressed his leg against Ronan’s under the table, a private show of support, a quiet reminder that it wasn’t Adam and Ronan, but Adam-and-Ronan. It was such a small thing, but it meant so much. Less than a year ago, Ronan had been sitting in this same booth, watching Adam hold hands with Blue and feeling like he’d swallowed his own heart and it was slowly poisoning him from the inside.

And now, it was Adam-and-Ronan.

He tilted his chin haughtily. “Maybe we fucking are, Sargent”.

Blue scrunched up her nose, her expression going from teasing to earnest. “Yeah, you are. It’s nice to see you looking like that for a change.”

Ronan raised an eyebrow. “Cute?”

Blue leaned her chin on her hand. “Happy.”

Oh.

Well, how about that.

Ronan exhaled loudly from his nose and threw himself back against the headrest of the booth; but he also extended a leg under the table so he could knock into Blue’s tiny booted foot. She bumped his boot right back.

At his side, Adam leaned into him lightly, shoulder pressed warmly to shoulder, his head tilted in a way that suggested he might soon be resting it against Ronan’s temple, as he sometimes did when he was tired after a long shift.

Yeah. Ronan supposed that, all considered, he was pretty happy.

[prorevenge]

Wonder Twin Powers Activate

Our teacher was almost sixty, dressed in bright colors(usually pink) and would speak like she was a politician in EVERY past life. This woman was HORRIBLE but I wasn't fully aware of how at first. I know that she could be curt and liked making jokes that seemed kind of rude but at the time, I just thought it was adult humor. At this point, I had few friends but people left alone because I was considered too crazy to mess with but this teacher treated me like I was adorable, also assumed it was because she was an old lady. Bro had chosen to sit next to me, which he usually tried knowing I could answer any questions if he struggled. I had finished the paperwork early and Matt was still working on it. I told him to let me know if he needed anything as I started reading a book. I usually zone out when I read so I fell asleep on accident and my brother didn't want to wake me up so he asked the teacher. A. Single. Question. She, instead of helping an answering the question, started berating him, talking down to him. He said nevermind but she didn't like that one bit as her voice got LOUDER. He kept trying to say nevermind until I was woken up by the teacher as she LOUDLY announced to the class how worthless my brother was and what an idiot he was and anything she could say until it finally registered what was happening and I stood up with an "Excuse me?" The class goes dead quiet as the teacher says "Sit down, honey" and continues to say things, now saying my brother was obviously cheating off my homework at home and how he planned to ride my coattails to pass school. My brother is really sensitive but I have never seen him cry in public because if he doesn't value your opinion, then who cares but this woman was shredding him to me and in front of his friends who DIDN'T KNOW he had a learning disability. I let loose, insulting her beyond measure even climbing over my desk to get in her face, the teacher actually being MY height. I wasn't going to attack an adult but man, I considered it and she KNEW it. She tried to hold her confidence, saying I should take my seat or she'd fail me and give me attention and I dared her to. I told my bro to get up and that we were going to the office, the teacher demanding we take our seats and actually grabbed him. I pushed her and told her and said I knew we'd be sent to the principal's anyway. On our way and waiting in the office, Bro confesses to me that she, even though he told her on the first day had been harassing him NONSTOP and the help I was giving him at home was basically the only education he was getting on the subject and the reason he didn't say anything before because he didn't want me to stop thinking he was cool. I became LIVID.

By this point, when the secretary saw me coming she KNEW I had done something. Surprisingly enough, admin was on good terms with my family because of the bullying issues that I had previously reported and gotten into fights over and it actually ended with my dad and the principal at the time becoming friends- his name Mr. Green and he went to became superintendent so whenever I was in the office, he was called as well to meet with the principal and my parents.

I relayed all of the info to the adults, Bro being pretty much too traumatized to respond. The principal tried to defend her stating Bro was overly sensitive but Mr. Green was NOT having it. They called her in and without letting anyone get a word in, she went on a tirade stating I had attacked her and she wanted the "demon twins" out of her class because we're nothing but trouble. This raised flags with the principal now because she had apparently BRAGGED to other staff about how she basically didn't have to teach me and I didn't bother her at all. They began filing kids in who witnessed everything, the bruise on Bro's arm now turning purple and skin slightly cut from where her manicure dug into him. Safe to say I didn't see her after that but I always felt like that wasn't good enough but my mom had mental health issues and my dad didn't want to stress her out.

Oh. But its not over, my vengeful ladies and gentlemen. I got a surprise I NEVER thought possible, time for revenge.

Fast forward a few years, my mom's mental health is getting unreasonable for a house of children and my siblings are split to live with grandparents. Me and oldest Sis go to live with my mom's mom in the next state over and Bro decided to stay with Grandma in state because of his friends.

I decided to go to a public school, not wanting to enjoy a repeat of bullies that were bailed out by their entitled parents. I decided I was going to read and talk to no one to avoid fights but that actually got me a lot of friends, including our football team's HULK, a 6'3" linebacker who bonded with me over our shared love of books and even came over to help my arthritic grandmother with anything at the drop of a hat.

One day, we had a substitute teacher that everyone did not like who seemed vaguely familiar to me in a haunted sort of way but it had nothing to do with Lord of the Rings or comics so I couldn't care less. I was only in this class because I had caught pneumonia the year before and I have a serious immune deficiency AND my dad passed away so I was out of school over the allotted absence time and had to repeat two classes(still only had four classes my senior year so I nailed it). The sub was hanging around more and more when it finally hit me.

IT WAS MY MIDDLE SCHOOL TEACHER.

Apparently, she had gotten remarried and went to Japan on a teaching program which she bragged about constantly when she tried to connect to me while I was reading manga in her class. I didn't know if she had recognized me at first but it was clear by the way she was singling me out after a bit she had. I was going to ignore it thinking she was only a sub when we got news that our prev. teacher was going to be gone for a while because she was having complications with her pregnancy and this teacher was now our permanent teacher for the rest of the year.

The class hated her, half of which deciding not to do work out of blatant protest.

Not me. I finished everything at the start of class, ASAP so I could go about ignoring her- something she HATED but tried to turn in her favor often. She would even try to give me book recommendations, bash something she saw me reading or even give out spoilers.

It was only after one classmate who turned around and said "this class is stupid, I don't want to be here" and I responded with "You do know if you DO the work you WON'T have to be here AGAIN NEXT YEAR?" and she used it as an opportunity to attack that it hit me. Time for some revenge.

I spoke to the guy after class, apologizing for snapping which he understood and then asked if he wanted tutoring and to help with revenge as I explained why. Apparently, this teacher had been going after him in class like my Bro too. SHE DIDN'T LEARN.

I continued to pay her no attention in class but also took the time to offer my fellow students assistance, which she hated, telling me to get back in my seat or to not talk to the other students because if they didn't understand it when she said it, they probably wouldn't understand the material at all. One of the male student's friends in the class had been let in on the plan and had left their phone on to record anything in class of her going after students.

At this school, each year had their own Assistant Principal and I learned what day the AP for this year(technically I was a junior so sophomore), a cool dude was coming in to observe class with other admins. JUDGEMENT DAY. The lesson the teacher was going through was Protagonist VS. Antagonist. How fitting.

She was going over the nursery rhyme, Little Miss Muffet. I finished the worksheet almost right away and I glanced at the stunned looks on one of the admin's faces who saw me write quickly and open a book and the AP actually snickered and leaned over to say "She does that a lot."

The teacher was talking about what was on the projector and realized quickly that the admins were not happy because half the class was not listening or paying attention. She then went to her usual target, me who she had seated front row; it was the closest seat to both her projector and desk so yeah, I knew she was singling me out.

Teacher: "You're reading in my class while I'm trying to teach, sweetie."

Me: "Yeah, I'm done with work."

Teacher: "Yes, but I'm still in the middle of the lesson." Me: "...Okay? Go ahead." Teacher: "I'd like you to pay attention." Me: "Why? I'm already done."

Teacher: "Yes, but the rest of the class isn't." Me: "Then what are you waiting for? I'm done, I'm not going to sit here doing nothing." Teacher: *flustered but grabs my worksheet* "Alright then, let's see your work." *looks it over before getting this huge grin on her face* "You put that the spider is the protagonist but that's wrong, Little Miss Muffet is the protagonist."

She then geared up to start a speech about the importance of listening to her when I said-

"Actually, I don't think she is. I wrote why if you'd read past the first sentence."

Teacher: "No, that's wrong." Me: "I don't think it is. The story goes "Little Miss Muffet, sat on a tuffet, eating her curds and whey; along came a spider who sat down beside her, and frightened Miss Muffet away." Based on that, all it says the spider definitively did was sit next to her, it didn't say he shouted "boo!" or attacked her. She could have just went "Ah! Spider!" and ran for it. Sounds more like she made a snap judgement based on appearance."

The class is speechless.

Teacher: *composing herself* "Well, it's still wrong. For this lesson, it's wrong."

Me: "Is it though?" I can see her jaw clenching, pissed. "The questions on these worksheets say to write who you THINK is the protagonist and antagonist and explain why. So technically, its a matter of perspective and the only way to get it wrong is to not meet the paragraph requirement."

The class echoes with "OOOOOOH's and some snickering.

Teacher: "Oh, if you think you're smart enough. Why don't YOU teach the class?"

I was initially going to turn her down, only making my point for her to LEAVE ME ALONE when my classmates started volunteering me. The male student even saying "I'm going to have to ask her to explain it all again later anyways and you get mad when she tries to help us so let her teach us."

I was glad the class rallied behind me but NO. I was not prepped for it. I improv'd on the white board, turning off the projection and even using comic book examples to explain the differences until the AP chuckled and called the joke(they're not actually supposed to say anything during observation), asking me to take a seat. The teacher was angry and continued to single me out until the end of class when she asked me to stay after to speak with her. The male student lingered in the doorway with his friend to stop the AP just outside, out of view stating they wanted to talk to him. They stopped him just in time for him to hear the teacher SHRIEK at me, accusing me of ruining her life and trying to ruin it AGAIN while slinging all sorts of insults at me.

The AP stormed in and she turned paper white. The other students followed saying they wanted to show him the recordings we took of her insulting kids in class and how the only reason kids were working now was because I spoke to them because the teacher would stop the ENTIRE class and make us do nothing for full periods saying we'd be too stupid to understand the lesson so why teach if we weren't going to respect her anyway. From there we went to the office and listed how she had been attacking other students and I told her how she taught at my middle school. He told me I could go back to class as he discussed it with the other APs and our Principal and I passed the teacher in the hallway and said "By the way, my brother says hi."

I went home, called him up and told him about it and he just sat there chuckling and going "Oh my god" repeatedly for about twenty minutes.

She was still there the next day but she did not say a WORD to me for the rest of the semester and the next semester, we were all put into different classes, learning that they allowed her to finish the semester on the promise to leave me alone but that she would NOT be coming back.

I managed to get the same teacher fired. TWICE.

And guess what? I write books now so, how's that for a twist?

(source) story by (/u/awkwardbirdnoise)

[nerdypisces160]

Pietro Maximoff - Soulmate AU

Pairing: Pietro Maximoff x Avengers!Reader

Warnings: fluff, angst, swearing

Word Count: 4,561 words (I finally made a long one!)

Summary: Y/N has been with the Avengers for six short months. She is a mutant with the power of telekinesis. She mastered her powers long ago, but occasionally she over does it. This can lead to her body practically shutting down on herself. How far will she go to save her soulmate?

*****

When people talked about soulmates they all said that the world just made sense. It seemed as if everything finally had a plan or purpose to it. There was no physical mark that showed if a person found their soumate; it was just a mental connection that joined the two. Nowadays soulmates aren't as common as they once were, but that didn't stop some from finding theirs. Even without having a soulmate people learned to live happily, but when someone did find them it seemed that everyone could feel their powerful emotions and connection. The ones that do find their soulmate recount that they were going about on a normal day. Nothing ever stands out, so when Y/N was out on a mission with the team she didn't expect to find her soulmate.

*****

Storming the newest Hydra base, Y/N was flying past Natasha and Clint swiping away the enemies. They all continued to fight taking out anyone they could. Y/N chuckled to herself seeing Cap drag a body behind him. "What are you laughing about kid?" Tony asked. "Nothing much, just watching Cap drag around some garbage," Y/N replied. Flying past with the rest of the Avengers Y/N made a small force field around her body in order to tackle down the approaching Hydra agents. "Shit!" Tony exclaimed. "Language," Cap countered. Y/N stifled her laughter hearing Cap's response. After her brief pause Y/N continued to fight along side with Thor. "Yeah. I think we lost the element of surprise," Clint said. Y/N rolled here eyes and growled, "Really Clint what told you that? Was it the fucking guns?" Of course hearing her language Tony then mentioned that Cap said 'language.'

Tired of hearing the bickering between her team mates she ignored them all. All at once Hydra agents surrounded her believing they could take her down; this made her smirk. Once they surrounded her, she began to concentrate on their weapons. She absorbed the energy from them that way they were useless. The agents all looked around confused on why their weapons weren't firing. Absorbing all that energy gave Y/N a tingling sensation in her fingers and up her arms. Using all the newly absorbed energy Y/N punched the ground creating an explosion that killed the surrounding Hydra scum. With her fist still connected to the ground, Y/N felt an unfamiliar presence. She tried to tune into the presence from the distance, but it was moving too fast. Noticing that it was heading towards Clint's location Y/N took off in his direction.

Just before Clint fired an arrow at the bunker Y/N hid behind a nearby tree. "What do you need kid?" Clint asked. "Figured you could use the help old man," she smirked. He began to grumble, "Old man my ass." Before Clint could fire his second arrow a force took both him and Y/N out. The force of the fall had knocked the wind out of her, so she wasn't able to get up for a few seconds. Though she did hear a foreign accented voice say, "You didn't see that coming." Finally getting up Y/N felt a strong wind push her back down. Growling, Y/N got back up only to have Clint fall on her. "What is your problem?" she growled. "Kinda got hit Y/N," he grunted. Natasha quickly ran over to the two. While Nat was assessing Clint, Y/N put a shield around them. Quickly the Hulk took down the attacking bunker.

Soon after the bunker was destroyed and Stark got the shield down Y/N flew over into the Hydra facility. As Tony went to download the files Y/N went throughout the building taking out anyone and everyone that crossed her path. Out of no where Y/N was grabbed and pushed against the wall. "What do you think you are doing?" a mysterious voice asked. Looking up Y/N saw clear, crystal blue eyes. Both parties' eyes widened realizing what they were to each other. All the rumors were true when people say things start to fit together. They were stuck in their own world, sadly it ended quicker then either would care to admit. All at once a young woman with brown hair put her hand on Y/N's soulmate's shoulder. Before Y/N could blink they were gone.

Back on the quinjet Y/N didn't know what to think about the situation. She wasn't ready to admit that her soulmate was with Hydra, in the end she decided that she wasn't going to tell anyone. Lots of people don't have soulmates, so what is the worse that could happen with ignoring hers. Once back at Headquarters, Y/N walked with Steve and Maria listening to them talk about the twins. Just hearing his name, Pietro, practically made her knees weak. Steve seemed to notice this because he stopped. "Are you okay Y/N?" Steve asked. "Yeah just a little tired. I guess I overworked myself," she said. He slowly nodded his head knowing occasionally Y/N overworked herself in the field. "I'm actually going to go rest," Y/N said. Before she could walk away Steve yelled out to her, "Don't forget about the party." "Do I have to go?" Y/N moaned. This caused Steve to smile to himself, "Yes if I have to go, you have to." "Fine," she grumbled. Y/N went to her room to shower and rest.

*****

Only one person in the world could love partying so much and that was playboy philanthropist Tony Stark. Only he would want to have a party a few days after a mission. Since that particular mission all Y/N could think about was Pietro. He wouldn't escape her mind, she thought about how things could be different for the two of them. Most of the time she imagined that he wasn't Hydra and that she wasn't an Avenger. All Y/N wanted was to have met her soulmate in the most boring way possible. Since that last mission Y/N had started behaving differently as well. She began to withdraw from her friends and started spending more time in the gym. None of her team mates really knew what was wrong with her, but one had a sneaking suspicion.

Once Y/N made it down to the party she went straight to the bar; her hope was that she could finally get her mind off Pietro. "What can I get for you ma'am?" the bartender asked. "Let me get a single malt neat," Y/N ordered. Whilst sitting at the bar, Y/N watched her team mates. Rhodey was standing by a group of women telling them one of his many War Machine stories. Natasha was making her way behind the bar. Steve and Thor were talking to an older gentleman. By the looks of it Thor was going to give the man some of his Asgardian mead. Giggling to herself, Y/N was excited to see the man's reaction to such a strong alcohol. All at once Bruce walked up to the bar where Natasha was now pouring drinks. "How did a nice girl like you wind up working in a dump like this?" Bruce asked. While making a drink for him, Natasha responded, "Fella done me wrong." "You got a lousy taste in men kid," he commented. Leaning forward she started to speak again, "He's not so bad. Well, he has a temper. Deep down he's all fluff. Fact is, he's not like anybody I've ever known. All my friends are fighters. And here comes this guy, spends his life avoiding the fights because he knows he'll win." Bruce, flabbergasted by what Nat said only replies with, "Sounds amazing." Taking a sip of her drink Nat admits, "He's also a huge dork. Chicks dig that." Bruce looked down sheepishly and embarrassed. She then suddenly asked him a question, "So what do you think should I fight this, or run with it?" Confused on how to respond, Bruce stutters his answer," Run with it, right? Or, did he... was he...? What did he do that was so wrong to you?" Leaning even closer Nat begins to whisper to Bruce, "Not a damn thing. But never say never." With that final statement Nat walked away.

"Is it easy to ignore your soulmate like that?" Y/N asked Bruce suddenly. Stuck in his head, Bruce was startled by the question. "I'm not good for her, the universe messed up our connection," Bruce responded. Unhappy with his answer Y/N stood up and began to yell at him, "That's bullshit and you know it! You two were put together for a reason! You shouldn't fight fate!" Realizing what she had said Y/N swiftly apologized to Bruce and ran off to her room. Once alone Y/N began to freak out. She now realized how important soulmates are.

All at once Y/N stood up and began packing her bags. She decided she needed to find her soulmate, but she couldn't do it as an Avenger. After all her essentials were packed she could hear a knock at her door, it was Clint. Not wanting anyone to know she was leaving Y/N used her powers to make everything look normal. It was very advanced, but she knew the risk was worth it. Once Y/N knew everything looked normal she invited Clint in. "What can I do for you Clint?" she asked. "What no 'old man'?" he joked. It was at this time Y/N wished her friends didn't know her so well. "Sorry old man I am too  far in my head right now," she responded. He seemed skeptical about her response, but didn't mention it. "Well we have a meeting in the morning. Looks like we have another threat ready to make us go 'extinct'," Clint said. Nodding her head, Y/N showed Clint the door and told him goodbye. Right when he was gone Y/N stopped using her powers. She felt horrible for leaving her team, but she needed to find her soulmate, her Pietro.

Getting away unnoticed was quite simple for Y/N. She was able to get to the records without raising any red flags. Once in the records, Y/N was able to look up all the information on the twins that she could. This led Y/N to return to her room where she found a wormhole that would allow her to travel to Sokovia. Being there gave Y/N a funny feeling. It was her body reacting to being in her soulmate's birthplace. All she had to do now was wait until fate brought the two together again.

*****

Y/N was late for the team meeting the next day, and no one could find her. It was uncommon for Y/N to be late. Due to her being relatively new she didn't like making a bad impression. Clint being the only one that was suspicious of her recent behavior went to her room to search. For hours he searched her room looking for clues on why she left. No one else on the team searched for Y/N; they were all too worried about Ultron. After having no success he decided to go to the one place he could truly be alone --- the vents. Once he was situated up there  he looked down in Y/N's room. "God damn it, that smart ass kid," he cursed. Clint was right in thinking that Y/N would leave a clue. She left it only where he would notice it. She left a letter addressed to him in the top corner of her bedroom, she painted it the same color of her walls so it would blend. Y/N remembered when Clint told her that he could see better from a distance. Finally retrieving the letter, Clint went back to the vents to read it.

Dear Clint,

I knew if anyone would understand and come looking for me it would be you. Last night I knew you didn't believe me, and I love that you didn't ask. I didn't want to leave you guys, you all are my family. I needed to leave though because I found my soulmate. The problem is I'm not sure I can handle who he is, and if I can't accept him then who am I? I'm a horrible person who is going to throw away the strongest connection a person can find in their life. Please don't tell anyone and don't bother looking for me. I need to find these answers on my own. If I can find the right answers then I'll be back, but if not then this is goodbye. I hope this isn't the end of our family. I appreciate and love you all.

Love, Y/N

*****

Shortly after arriving in Sokovia, Y/N could tell that Pietro wasn't there, but something in her told her not to worry. She knew that it wouldn't be long before they reconnected. While waiting Y/N got to discover Sokovia. She realized that the people there were very close knit. It was a small and peaceful community. When Y/N read the file on Pietro she read of how his and his sister's parents died. She could almost understand why he chose to join Hydra.

It seemed that today was finally the day Y/N had been looking forward to; it was the day her and Pietro would reunite. Waking up that morning Y/N felt a tight feeling in her chest. The thing was she wasn't sure whether it was a good feeling or bad. Leaving her small single bedroom apartment she went into the capital, Novi Grad. Not long after getting into the capital she noticed shadows fly above her. When she looked up she seen many robots preparing to land. Seconds later the ground under her feet began to rumble almost like an earthquake. Once the rumbling stopped she noticed that the area she was on was rising higher than the surrounding areas. It wasn't long before Y/N began to hear the citizen's cries for help. Naturally her body went into protective mode. She knew that she needed to kill the weird robots that were flying around not even five minutes ago.

At first Y/N made a portal that way she could evacuate citizens to safety. When the people around her were safe she started to chase down the robots. Killing them was easy, she was able to just rip them apart with her powers. Going further into the capital Y/N made sure to help anyone she passed. It wasn't until she was on the edge that she noticed she wasn't alone, a helicarrier flew pass her. While helping out Y/N completely forgot the Avengers would come out. Following the helicarrier, Y/N found Steve and Natasha having a conversation at the edge of the now floating capital.

"I'm not leaving this rock with one civilian on it," Steve ordered. "I didn't say we should leave. There's worse ways to go. Where else am I gonna get a view like this?" Natasha professed. "You know I would never let you all go, even if that meant going back in time and killing myself over it," Y/N confessed to the two. Both, not expecting Y/N, turn around to face her. Neither knew what to say, it was only a few short days ago that she had abandoned them. Breaking out of her trance first, Natasha stormed towards Y/N. Expecting to be slapped or punched Y/N closed her eyes and braced herself. Instead of a slap or punch Natasha threw her arms around Y/N and squeezed her tightly. "Where the hell did you go?" Nat whispered in Y/N's ear. Squeezing her back just as hard Y/N explained, "I needed to find my happiness, just like you and Bruce." Letting each other go Natasha just nodded to Y/N. Looking behind Y/N, Nat noticed the new recruit focused on Y/N. "Looks like you might get that chance. Go and be quick," Nat advised. While Nat and Y/N were in their bubble Nick Fury was talking about bringing the helicarriers out of retirement. Once Nat walked back to Steve, Y/N walked over to Pietro.

"I never though we would actually be together especially since you are with SHIELD," confessed Pietro. "At least it wasn't Hydra!" Y/N joked. Her comment made him chuckle. Hearing his deep, sexy chuckle made Y/N realize how connected they were. Even though this was only their second conversation she could see their whole future together. Noticing that Y/N was stuck in her head daydreaming Pietro stepped closer and put his hands on her hips. "Are you alright sweetheart?" he asked. Coming out of her daze Y/N responded, "I'm fine, just ready for this to be over." "I'll protect you don't worry," Pietro promised. Feeling the heat of the moment the two began to lean in closer, slowly their lips were inching closer and closer together. "Hey you two lets save the world first then you two can go off and make little mutant babies!" Natasha interrupted. Embarrassed, the two look away and nod, each took off in opposite directions.

Now that Fury and Rhodes were there, they were able to get more of the citizens out of Sokovia. All the Avengers both new and old converged onto the Vibranium core. Then Thor yelled out to Ultron, "Is that the best you can do?" In response Ultron summoned an army full of robots. "For fucks sake Thor you had to ask," Y/N gritted out. Then all of the robots started to attack. Everyone fought valiantly against the robots. Suddenly the robots started to retreat. Too distracted thinking of a way to save Sokovia Y/N didn't hear the new plan. It wasn't until she felt a warm tingle on her shoulder that she refocused. "Sweetheart, you need to get on the boats,"Pietro advised. "I'm not leaving Pietro, I am here to help all the people I possibly can," she asserted. Before Pietro could respond Wanda, his twin sister, spoke up, "Go make sure everyone is on the boats, I am protecting the core for now. Both of you go. Just come back when everyone is safe." Without a word to either of them Y/N took off to look for any stranded citizens. "You have a brave soulmate," Wanda commented. "Yeah she is," Pietro agreed.

Luckily not a lot of people were left on Sokovia. The Avengers were able to get everyone on the boats, or so they thought. Y/N was walking behind Clint and Natasha when they all made it to the lifeboats. Once there, they heard a woman calling out to her brother. "Ma'am what's wrong?" Y/N asked. "Costel? We were in the market. Costel?!" the woman replied worriedly. When Y/N turned around she noticed that Clint was already gone. "God damn that old man," she whispered to herself. Taking off Y/N went to find Clint. Eventually she found him, but the sight in front of her was one she would never forget.

Y/N watched as Pietro stood like a statue for a few brief seconds before dropping down on the ground. Not having time to grieve, Y/N ran down to Pietro's body. Checking for a pulse she was lucky to find a small but weak pulse. Quickly she flipped Pietro onto his back and put her hands over some of the many bullet wounds he had. She began to focus on his wounds. She imagined them all closing and his blood being restored. She pictured him completely healthy with all his abilities intact. As she continued to slowly heal Pietro, Clint crawled over to the two. "Y/N you need to stop. This is too much for you," Clint said. "Would you give up on Laura?" she questioned through gritted teeth. "No," he admitted. "Then let me do this for him," she begged. Now understanding Y/N, Clint stood up and picked up Costel. Going back to concentrating Y/N didn't even hear Cap come up behind her. It wasn't until he shook her shoulder that she broke concentration. "Y/N we need to go now," Cap ordered. Looking down, Y/N took notice that many of Pietro's wounds were closed and that his breathing was stronger. "Understood Cap, just grab Pietro for me," she said. He nodded and leaned down to pick up Pietro. Once was Pietro was picked up, Y/N looked up at the two. It wasn't until that very moment that Y/N realized how much she had drained herself.

While healing Pietro's wounds Y/N was giving him her own life source. Y/N had never healed wounds that severe, and it was staring to show. She could feel her life slipping through her fingers. There was a subtle pounding in her ears where her blood pumped. Her vision began to go hazy and she felt her heart beat fewer and further times apart. The last thing she seen was a dark clothed blob, she could only assume was Clint, run to her and pick her up. By the time he secured her in his arms she had already closed her eyes and began to welcome the light.

*****

The room that Y/N was in was quiet all that could be heard was the heart monitor, and even that was slow and low. After Clint had picked up Y/N both Steve and him ran off to the life boats. As far as the other team members were aware Pietro was dead and Y/N was alive and healthy. Once the four were on the lifeboats the remaining members of the team surrounded them. No one knew what to say. Clint explained to them that Pietro was Y/N's soulmate, and that she knew that she would most likely die to save him. After the city was blown up Vision flew down to save Wanda. By the time he brought her to the lifeboat she was awake and conscious. Once she was on the boat she went straight to her brother's body. She held him close to her and cried into his neck. Suddenly everyone heard and watched as Pietro began to cough heavily. "Why are you crying sister?" he asked hoarsely. At first Wanda was completely shocked because she watched Pietro die. "H-how are you alive?" she stuttered. "I can answer that for both of you," Clint interrupted. The twins watched Clint as he stepped to the side and revealed Y/N's pale and lifeless like body. "She wanted to make sure that you survived this. It was a lot on her body, and we aren't sure she will make it out of this one," Clint said solemnly. To say Pietro was devastated was an understatement. He had barely gotten to know Y/N, and now she might not come back to him at all.

It has been a few days since that dreadful mission and Y/N was still not awake yet. While she has been in a coma she had had many visitors, most of the time it was the twins. Pietro would sit next to her bed for hours. He would move her hair from her face and gently caress her face. When he was alone with her he would cry and beg her to wake up, but nothing ever happened. When Wanda visited Y/N she often was conflicted about her feelings. On one hand Wanda was grateful that Y/N saved her twin brother's life, but on the other hand Wanda was upset because she could see and feel her brother's pain. Another person that was greatly affected by Y/N's coma was Clint. He felt guilty for Pietro having to come save him. He appreciated that Pietro kept Clint alive, but he wished that Pietro would have never been injured in the first place. Clint was ready for Y/N to finally wake up because he had a surprise for her.

It was the first time that Clint has been able to visit Y/N. He came to visit everyone at the tower but mostly the twins and Y/N. Once he got there he requested that he could visit her alone. For awhile he just sat there and watched as Y/N took steady breaths. After a while he stood up and made his way next to Y/N. He sat down next to her and held her hand. "Kid you need to wake up. If you can't do it for me then do it for Pietro. He is a mess without you," Clint confessed. "It's funny how whipped he is already," Clint joked in hope for some reaction from Y/N. He looked down at the hand he was holding. "Besides you need to meet your godson," he added. As he expected he didn't get a response back. Giving up on waiting, Clint stood and made his way to the door. Guess he'll have to try again another day.

"Do I get to know my godson's name at least?" Y/N asked sarcastically. Clint couldn't believe his ears, he turned so fast he almost gave himself whiplash. "Nathaniel Pietro Barton," Clint whispered. "Good name and even better choice of godmother," Y/N admitted. Clint didn't know what to do. He figured he should inform the team that Y/N was now awake. "Are you going to just stand there or are you going to get Bruce?" Y/N asked sarcastically. "Uhm actually Bruce is gone, he left during the whole Sokovia incident," Clint confessed. Y/N looked down almost ashamed, "Oh how is Nat doing?" Clint just shrugged, "You know how she gets with her feelings." "Yeah you're right. Do you mind getting a doctor for me?" Y/N asked. Clint simply nodded his head and made his way out the door with a large smile on his face.

"Well Miss. L/N everything looks good, but you need to rest for the next few weeks that way your powers can regenerate," the doctor explained. Nodding her head Y/N agreed, "Understood Doc, I'll rest for the next few weeks." Once the examination was over the doctor bid Y/N a goodbye and left the room. Before the door could completely close Y/N heard a strong whoosh, next to her stood Pietro. "Took you long enough Speedy," Y/N teased. "I was stuck waiting for Sleeping Beauty to wake up," he joked. His joke brought both of them into a giggle fit. When both calmed down they realized how close they had gotten. Pietro brought his hand up to Y/N's face. Slowly he traced her bottom lip with his thumb. "Can I kiss you?" he asked softly. "Please," she whispered. Finally their lips met in a slow yet passionate kiss, both conveying the worry they had for each other. When the kiss finally ended they both caught their breath and slowly opened their eyes. "Please don't scare me like that again Sleeping Beauty,"Pietro pleaded. "Never again my Prince, never again," Y/N confirmed.

*****

Hello my lovelies, I know it has been a LONG time since I have written anything. Recently I have had more inspiration. Hopefully I will update more often. I look forward to putting out more stories.  

[cjrae]

Dueling Fairytales. Or: Why Lucifer won’t take a Queen.

One of the most popular fan theories is that Chloe will become the Queen of Hell. The appeal is strong on the surface as it does several things;

- It codifies Lucifer and Chloe’s relationship into a formalized, wedded partnership as King and Queen.

- It answers the question “What will happen to Lucifer and Chloe when she eventually dies?”

- It elevates Chloe to a seemingly exalted position, which is coded as a reward.

The trouble with this theory is that if Chloe became the Queen of Hell, that would undermine the major themes of the narrative. To emphasize my point, let me pose a question.

Is the story telling us that Chloe needs to become worthy of Lucifer or that Lucifer needs to become worthy of Chloe?

Actually, let’s flesh this question out a bit more.

Does Chloe need to go through trials that test her commitment to kindness in the face of abuse to be elevated to a higher status in order to receive Lucifer as her reward? Or does Lucifer need to learn restraint, a higher degree of empathy and to be on the receiving end of kindness in order to grow up so that he can learn, not only to give and receive love, but the responsibility that comes with a duty of care?

If these sound like two completely different stories, you’re absolutely right. The first one is Cinderella, the second is Beauty and the Beast. And in regards to the question of the Queen of Hell, they’re both relevant because these two tales are dueling in Season Four with the introduction of Eve.

The Cinderella Story

Cinderella; a girl who has no control over her life, serving a cruel family that takes advantage of her and erases her identity in service of the family’s needs, but whose kindness, compassion and empathy in the face of grief win her friends that help her escape her prison and find freedom.

Fits Eve to a tee, doesn’t it? She’s highly empathic, makes friends at the drop of a hat, even with people who are inclined to dislike her - i.e. Ella and Chloe. She’s kind, but not stupid. She only needs one look at a situation with all the actors in the room before she can pick out what’s going on between Lucifer and Chloe.

What makes Eve’s story highly compelling is watching her abuse her virtues attempting to fulfill the themes of her own story, which ultimately causes her to fail.

The central theme of Cinderella’s story is her commitment to kindness in the face of her family’s abuse. The one thing the Cinderella cannot be, if she is to succeed, is selfish; to allow it would be to invite that poison into her own psyche. That isn’t to say that the Cinderella is doomed to be a doormat either. She rebels by going to the ball (or in Eve’s case, to Earth). However, there is a difference between standing up for yourself, acknowledging your own needs to be valid and worthy of consideration versus prioritizing your needs over the needs of others, irregardless of what they feel.

Which is exactly what Eve does. Her pursuit of Lucifer is highly selfish.

Lucifer is telling Eve “no” in multiple ways, including verbal at the end of 4x04. He doesn’t desire a relationship with her, he’s trying to work through something very painful and he’s not in a good place right now. He is in love with someone else and Eve knows it.

Unfortunately, what Lucifer wants is irrelevant. Eve wants him and she intends to have him because Lucifer is her second chance - Adam couldn’t love her because he was remained in love with Lilith, but this time will be different. This time Eve thinks she can win. So she pushes him into showing her his Devil face and pours balm on the wound inflicted by Chloe when she kisses it.

What Lucifer misses in that moment is that Eve’s easy acceptance of him as the Devil is a giant red flag in and of itself.

The Virtuous Daughter

The Beauty; the member of her materialistic family who prizes practicality, hard work, and making the best of any situation in the face of ruin. The one who will sacrifice herself without hesitation to protect the ones she loves, who puts her needs last.

Chloe is a homicide detective instead of the virtuous, youngest daughter, but the Beauty is often characterized by her devotion to duty - filial duty in particular. Sure enough, who is Chloe emulating? Her beloved father, the cop killed in the line of duty.

Beauty and the Beast is a more interactive tale between the lovers than Cinderella. It is through cohabitation with the Beast and learning about each other that the Beast learns to put others’ needs above his own, rising above his former self absorption while the Beauty learns to accept the goodness within the Beast, not only for his attempts to do better, but for who he is as the Beast.

This is literally the story of Season 4 - of Chloe coming to terms with Lucifer being the Devil and reconciling the fact that she is in love someone she’s been told is the personification of evil.  It takes her the entire season to fall in love with the Devil as opposed to the Lost Prince (echoing the earliest written versions), who she’s been in love with since Season 2, and it comes in stages.

- 4x02, the ax scene when she realizes that Lucifer’s love for her is genuine, soothing her fear that, once again, like with Pierce, she’s been used as a pawn in a game she had no idea was being played.

- 4x05, when she throws herself between Lucifer and the anticipated explosion. The moment they both realize Chloe would sacrifice herself to protect the Devil. 

- 4x07, when Lucifer chooses justice over punishment and brings Tiernan into the station, sacrificing his own need for vengeance and proving to Chloe that the Devil is a good man. Chloe is still bifurcating Lucifer, but she acknowledges that he is both angel and Devil in that critical scene on the balcony. 

- 4x09, the traditional recognition of the Beast and the Prince as the same person, when Chloe realizes that his Devil form is a manifestation of Lucifer’s declared self-hatred.

Chloe’s love is not a redemptive object the way Eve wants her love for Lucifer to be. The transformation from Beast to man requires Lucifer to understand and forgive himself - Chloe can’t do it for him. Chloe’s acceptance can serve as a guide on that path, but Lucifer must do the work himself. He clings blindly to the idea that Chloe’s acceptance will either save or condemn him in a single moment - and when he attempts to force the issue he’s unable to accept Chloe’s “I don’t know” as an answer. 

The Prince Of Darkness

Lucifer ends up caught in the middle of these two stories as each of them casts him in a very different role.  The show frames Lucifer’s struggle between these two opposing visions of who he is as good and evil, but there’s something to be said for the idea that Lucifer would simply like to know which story he’s in, thank you very much!

Is he Eve’s Prince? A static, perfect figure that she will receive as a reward - her vehicle of escape and self-actualization?

Or is he Chloe’s Lost Prince? A man, trapped in a form not his own, battling his own worst impulses in order to regain the original identity he has lost?

And, in a twist, each woman assigns qualities of the other tale to their version of Lucifer - Eve’s Prince is a bestial version - Lucifer as he was in the Beginning. Primal, impulsive and living entirely in the moment with no care for the consequences of his actions. Chloe’s Lost Prince, however, is more of a tragic figure; sundered from himself, split into two - Prince and Beast.

The Beast is a protagonist of his own tale, but both as the Beast and as the Prince he is an object of rescue, which is not something Lucifer needs or wants from Chloe. Lucifer has no desire to be saved - it’s a concept that we’ve watched him actively reject before, when Amenadiel suggests that the return of his wings means he’s been forgiven. Chloe’s role in the tale is to learn to accept the Beast, letting go of the Lost Prince. 

As the Cinderella’s Prince, he’s simply an object, not a man. Lucifer’s role as Eve’s Prince is a vehicle to elevate her to an exalted position that will remove her from the prison she’s lived in most of her life to a place where she will be loved.

It’s only after Lucifer rejects both Eve and Chloe’s objectified visions of him that he’s able to look at himself and get to the core of what has been torturing him since, arguably, the beginning of time. He is neither Prince - instead he is a man in nearly unspeakable pain as he sits in Linda’s office, knuckles white as he finally identifies and articulates the problem - his self hatred.

The King and Queen of Hell

Both Cinderella and the Beauty share the traditional raising of status, but in Lucifer’s case it’s worth asking - is becoming the Queen of Hell a good thing?

I would argue that question actually has nothing to do with either Chloe or Eve and everything to do with Lucifer himself and why he became the King of Hell.

Both Cinderella’s prince and the Beast’s royal status are their original identity. But in Lucifer’s case, becoming the King of Hell is the curse from his Father. However you interpret God’s motive for punishing his son, the bottom line is that Hell is somewhere that Lucifer hates. It is not, nor has it ever been, home to him. It’s not a place that he is proud of, nor does he relish the work he does there. He has enough pride to do the job to the best of his ability, but we know he’s delegated out as much as he could, even if Lucifer’s hands are far from clean.

In short, Hell is nowhere that Lucifer wants to be. He certainly doesn’t want anyone that he actually cares about to be there either.

Eve, however, needs Lucifer to be the King of Hell. The first half of 4x07 is, from Eve’s perspective, the high point of their relationship. Lucifer is the most intimate he’s ever been with Eve when they’re lying in bed after punishing Julian.

Of course Eve wants that back - enough that she’s willing to listen to Kinley when he tells her that, if she wants Lucifer to love her, she needs to convince him to go back to Hell. As much as Eve recognizes that Lucifer doesn’t want to rule Hell, it’s where he could “be a King again,” which is exactly how he was acting when he was closest to Eve. And, of course, ruling Hell would be different “with a Queen by his side.”

So she, once again, succumbs to selfishness - and is called on it by Chloe in the wake of it’s consequences. “How could you be so selfish?! Naive!”

Eve had already lost Lucifer, but her attempt to force her ascension to become Lucifer’s Queen only crystallizes that they’re not right for each other, as she’s faced with losing Lucifer’s friendship and respect. He would have to be the one to elevate her to that exalted position and he’d already told her “I don’t like who I am with you!” rejecting the role of Prince to Eve’s Cinderella.

Lucifer’s desire to be his own man, aligns much more closely with Chloe’s desires. Chloe has no need for pomp and circumstance. She’s always been the practical member of this partnership - sensible shoes, boring sedans, Costco runs and reading a bedtime story to Trixie. There is room in her life for desire, but Lucifer’s presence is enough to fulfill that.

In fact, in the moment when Chloe tells Lucifer she loves him and begs him not to leave, she is finally asking for something for herself. The Beauty has learned to allow herself a healthy dose of desire rather than a complete devotion to duty while Lucifer, as the Beast, has learned the value of love, empathy and a duty of care. Chloe and Lucifer have transformed each other into better, more complete versions of themselves.

Presumably, if Hell can be faced and fought in Season 5 and Lucifer released from the burden of the throne, then having the “curse” lifted might allow him to leave the Devil in the past and simply be Lucifer Morningstar, the identity he’s fought for since the pilot.

But, of course, if that happens, then Lucifer will no longer be the King of Hell. Therefore, he has no need for a Queen.

And They All Lived Happily Ever After? 

The time for despair has passed - neither Lucifer nor Chloe can afford it. Instead, they (and we) are awaiting the reversal; the change in the status quo that will give them the opportunity to challenge Lucifer’s fate. If they are successful, then there may in fact be a new Queen of Hell, if Lilith comes into play.

But if she appears, she will likely not be Lucifer’s Queen, but a new ruler come to usurp the throne.

Long live the Queen.

[annakie]

An Annotated Mass Effect Playthrough, Part Eight

List of Posts: 0 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9

I accidentally messed up the numbering on part Seven’s link to post six, so if you missed post six (or yesterday’s part seven), the numbering up there is correct.

Wherein we get back out into the galaxy, explore, help some people, and kill some others!

So now that we have Liara, it’s time to really dig into the galaxy.  We have a few people we talked to on the CItadel who need help, and maybe we’ll stumble into a few more things along the way.

First of all, let’s check out the galaxy map...

Hey wait a sec, what’s this?

Petra Nebula!?  Oh hey, another new addition by the ME1 Recalibrated mod.

Gorgeous map, only one system available.

Heeeey we recognize this place, we’ll get to go there in.... two games!

Can’t land there (or anywhere in the system) but it’s cool that it exists! There are a couple of other neat little things in the system I didn’t screenshot so that you can have a cool new experience yourself if you decide to use the mod on your next playthrough.

What I really miss from ME3, by the way, is the % markers which note when you’ve fully explored a system or if there’s more stuff to find there.

Anyway, my PLAN had been to take a screenshot of each planet or spacecraft before I entered it to help orient the playthrough better, and then the non-screenshotting couple of hours happened, so we lost some of that along the way, sorry.  

Still, let’s see what kind of trouble we can get ourselves into.

I love this planet.  The lava juuuuust below the surface, peeking out.  Just some of the coolest terrain in the game.

What a great view, let’s get a little clo--

OOPS.

I meant to do that.

Wide open spaces with no fears of a thresher maw living in the lava! ...I hope?

Ah, here’s our objective, a distress signal being sent from this location, let’s see if we can help...

FUCKING GETH AMBUSH.

Aw yeah, jumping over those explosives like a pro!

...most of the time.

Well this planet was a bust.  Let’s see if we can actually help someone.

Another planet, scanned a few things, not sure what we’re doing here but hey, I found a lone building!

Ah yes, a prefab which is totally different from all the prefabs we’ll enter because the creates are stacked in a different configuration.

Honestly they should have put one of these prefabs in ME3 for Old Times Sake. (The ones that actually look like homes/labs/whatever make so much more sense.)

Annnd we’re being attacked.  Not sure why, but here we go!

Awww yeah, Throw!  And Ash and Kaidan managing to be useful I think?

Except they let a guy slip by us, but luckily there’s a convenient explosive nearby.  That got ‘em.

OK back to facing forward OH FUCK A KROGAN.

Kaidan’s biotics and my shotgun, a favorite combination.  Now stay down!

Sweet, level up!

And that fight’s over, time to explore this pla...

Whew, thanks Kaidan.

This guy thought he could sneak past me.  Well me, my shotgun and my 20 shield strength sure showed him.

ME1 combat is so... messy though.  I mean, I honestly still enjoy it, but I’m in the camp that agrees combat gets better every game, Andromeda included.  Of course, I just REALLY LOVE Vanguarding in ME3... charging into a group of enemies, hitting Nova, spamming charge again praying that I’ll find a good target to charge to in time.  ME1 combat is basically all just... spam abilities from cover and hope your companions are doing something useful.  Being a Vanguard is more about style over substance in ME here.  I mean you do get some really useful abilities, but your shotgun isn’t that much use unless things get too close.

Which, you know, they do pretty often.

Anyway, remember... I WILL DESTROY YOU!!!

FUCK I hadn’t been back to the Citadel to pick up Nassana Dantius’ quest yet.  Let’s just reload the quicksave from outside and we’ll... come back and do this the right way later and see the entire quest.

I do this more often than I care to admit.

Also no screenshot for this but... I also found Wrex’s personal quest planet and recognized it only when I saw the building, since it’s in a pretty memorable location.  Still, grabbed everything else off the planet so it’ll be quick when it’s time to go back and do that quest.

Well let’s go back to poking around the galaxy.

Message coming in.  Patching it through.

Ah, yeah, hey Hackett.  What’s that?  You’ve got some dirty work you need me to do for you?  Cool, be right there.

Before the ME2 DLC Arrival came out, Hackett was one of Mass Effect’s biggest mysteries.  Who is this guy?  Why is he telling us to do things?  Does he have some secret agenda?  Why is he so sketchy?  Our Shepards seemed to trust him but WOW he sure did send us on some touchy missions.  Speculation was all over the place on what he looked like and what he was really doing.

Turns out, he’s just a pretty cool guy who wants you to take on all the secret spy missions the Alliance doesn’t want to take credit for.

I wish I’d saved it, but just a week or two ago I saw a pretty great post circulating about Hackett.  He IS the guy that’s going to make sure a job gets done, even if he’s not going to do it himself.  He’s the back-room Admiral with the squeaky clean image up front.  He’s the Gus Fring of the Alliance.

Also getting Lance Riddick to voice him was great.  Just a real authoritative, steady guy who you actually want to trust.  

And it turns out he looks basically exactly like most people thought, but maybe with a few more scars. (I mean, he really looks a lot like Lance Riddick, tbh)  But we don’t know that yet.  For now, let the mystery be.

Time to actually go help someone.

Ah yeah, Chairman Burns, we do negotiate with terrorists, in this case.  But they needed negotiating with.

Maxing out the Paragon-meter is worth it for moments like this.  These guys have probably suffered and it’s no surprise that no one has really listened.  Sounds like a lot about the galaxy hasn’t changed since we got out there.

This is also an excellent moment for Kaidan.

Being able to let Kaidan reason with them is fantastic.  Although he probably ultimately doesn’t make a difference mechanics wise, it’d be nice if maybe the check is easier if he’s here.  I don’t know.  But Kaidan knows, even if he’s one of the “lucky” ones who “only” gets migraines.  

One of the grossest posts I’ve seen about Kaidan are people who argue she shouldn’t be on the team because of his implants and since he has a “disability”.  Or that it’s “kinder” to sacrifice him on Virmire.  That’s some real gross ablism you’ve got there.  

Anyway, I love being able to keep this situation under control. Burns actually comes through if you do, even if those guys probably go to prison for awhile for terrorism.  Better than being dead.

Time for... another planet!

Again, didn’t take a screencap of this one but... there’s a missing survey team? I must have picked this quest up in the elevators, because normally you get it on Noveria.  Anyway,  Let’s go find them on Trebin, I’m sure they just can’t broadcast anymore or something.  It’s cool

FUCK. SHIT SHIT SHIT.  FUCK!!!

I probably could have actually used Warp or Throw or even Barrier there but... too late now!  We lived!

I was all ready to blame this on Cerberus, but creepily, there’s no explanation for who huskified them or why.   I’m still going to blame Cerberus, seems like something they’d do.

Well, time to move on.

Honestly, I can’t believe anyone who says ME1 isn’t beautiful.

And driving the Mako is FUN in places like this!

Oh there’s a camp up ahead, we’re here to find the remaining crew of a crashed ship for our new friend in the Citadel Tower.  

Again, no footage/screenshot but eventually you find where the mercenaries tracked down Willem (the brother) and killed them.  Shit.  We were too late.  I actually tear up sometimes telling Garoth that his brother died.  They held out for awhile, too, but we were too late.

It would have been nice if, say, if the very first thing we did after leaving the Citadel was to come here, we could have saved him, but I guess this quest is another way of Bioware telling us that sometimes, there’s just nothing you can do to change things.

One more quest this update, then we’re stopping back off at the Citadel next.

Presrop, one of the most well-known of the sidequest planets. (OKok, technically it’s a moon.)

One of my favorite landing sequences, just because the stars make it so... dramatic.

I mean DAMN.

Klendagon's most striking feature is, of course, the Great Rift valley that stretches across the southern hemisphere. What is most fascinating about the Rift is that it does not appear to be natural. The geological record suggests it is the result of a "glancing blow" by a mass accelerator round of unimaginable destructive power. This occurred some thirty-seven million years ago.

It took a solid three minutes of Flycam flying to get that closeup shot, btw.  I actually flew all the way in the first time I came here, and didn’t take screenshots.  Took about six minutes.  The updated texture is impressive.

Well, Hackett sent us here, let’s deal with Major Kyle.

Being nice and non-threatening gets you into places.

I’ll admit, before I came in here, I decided to cheat in enough paragon points to max out Paragon already.  For me personally, I’m trying to make sure this is an “ultimate” playthrough, a save file I can just use over and over from here on out.  I want everything to import into ME3 the first time around with all the plot flags set how I want them without messing with Gibbed’s Savegame Editor, so making sure I can convince everyone how I want them to is important.  So hey, Major Kyle, stand down.

I don’t think I’ve ever played as a Ruthless Shepard in ME1, or if I have, it’s been so long I’ve forgotten how it goes.  But he was the commanding officer at the battle of Torfan, and your CO if you’re Ruthless.  He’s also a reminder of how serious PTSD can be, and what it can do to a person.  

I also love this tidbit from the Wiki, which I didn’t know since I’d never done these particular choices before:

(In Mass Effect 2)  If Martin Burns was not saved in 2183, a news report on the Citadel will announce that Kyle is trying to form an all-biotic community as the reparations were not given to L2 biotics and they have become even more alienated from galactic society.

I really liked that if you reason with him, he doesn’t give you any trouble and turns himself in like he says.

Hey, this negotiation thing is easy when you’re the best person in the galaxy at it!!