#you've given the kid dysphoria

[secondbeatsongs]

rereading The Voyage of the Dawn Treader, and the dragon chapter is really like. wow. you fucked up a weird asshole of a kid is what you've done. look at him. he's got dysphoria.

[religion-is-a-mental-illness]

The really crucial point that we're not grappling with at all is, even the diagnosis of gender dysphoria itself, whatever you want to call it - we've got the World Health Organization calling it "gender incongruence," we've got the DSM calling it "gender dysphoria," in the past it was gender identity disorder - you've really got to look at, is this even real?

Is this-- as far as I'm concerned it is a culture-bound syndrome that appeared at this time and in this place, and because it's in the symptom pool-- I love Edward Shorter's concept of the "symptom pool," which is the pool of legitimate mental health diagnoses that exist in any culture, in any time.

And so, what you have is a bunch of unhappy people, people who are in a state of distress and mental fragility, and what they do, they select a diagnosis from the symptom pool of their time. Right now, they can select gender dysphoria and then they apply that to their lives, and it feels very real, and it feels very-- it feels totally legitimate to them.

But then they go, and they show up at gender clinics and they've given themselves this diagnosis. And the madness is the fact that in gender clinics, nobody questions the diagnosis. Even though it is as culture-bound in my opinion as like if we had the epidemic of multiple personality disorder in the 1980s and 1990s. That was, it spread like wildfire. It just, it was an epidemic. And then it disappeared, because it was based entirely on something completely nonsensical that had no science and no evidence to it.

The same thing is happening now. Gender identity ideology, this whole trans rights movement, has created a culture-bound syndrome of gender dysphoria and people, unhappy people are just applying that label to their lives. But it's not necessarily-- it's not real in the sense that, you know, cancer is real, or diabetes is real. And yet, we're treating it with this harsh, brutal medical pathway that is as extreme as cancer treatment, and that-- Really, I think a focus on what exactly the diagnosis is, is absolutely essential to avoid misdiagnosis. To avoid all of these kids, maybe they're autistic and they're interpreting the difficulties with autism as a sign that they're transgender.

--

Full video:

[nordictwin]

Hi I just read your post about your IWATA Stratos Kids AU and I was wondering if you had any further developments for that because I adore the concept

Yes yes yes, let me tell you all about it!

Sorry this took a little while, but there was a lot more to type out, once I really got going.

So I don't know if you've read any of my other info-dumps in the reblogs of the OG post, but to recap on that: none of the Stratos-Helios kids know Sol is also aware of the timeloops. They get so caught up in protecting Sol's happiness, they forget to consider "if we remember, does Sol remember too?", while Sol has been so used to being alone with this, they don't really think the others might know as well.

The only one fully in the loop is Sym, and Sym thinks the entire situation is too hilarious to let anyone know. And then Congruence also rather quickly catches on, and she's of a similar mindset.

Now, further developments:

The Stratos Kids:

Marz: in my mind, Marz will always be Marz - no matter the situation. But Marz in this AU is very aware that, although words don't mean anything to her, they sure do mean a lot to the people around her. So while still brutally honest, and with her memories of past politics, this is a Marz who's just a little bit softer around the edges. Better at using her words, better at using her leadership skills to help on a much wider scale than just further her own interests. Much to Eudicot's delight, this Marz - while she'll still complain and whine about any sort of work - still contributes to the colony. Particularly, she becomes quite the little helper and organizer around the offices. What they don't realize, however, is that she's also quite good at listening, and she never stops paying attention - meaning she picks up a lot more secrets than they realize.

Tang: like Marz, Tangent has also been given a serious reality check as to her attitude and actions. Particularly how her words impact her relationship with Dys, and how it will end if she doesn't change. Cue extreme mutual hovering and clinginess (which the adults chalk up to the two bonding after the crash), as well as an increased effort to communicate with help from Tammy and Marz. Aside from this, Tang has also wisened up to Instance not really being an ideal role-model, instead turning to Professor Hal and Congruence for guidance on more matters - not just academia. She also gets a lot more respect for both Dys and Cal, relying heavily on the data they can bring back to the labs, and she even dares to venture out on a few expeditions herself.

Dys: he's a matched pair with Tang after the crash, getting hit particularly hard with the memories of lives where they reconcile. And with Tang actively reaching out to him, actually trying to understand him, well... he feels like he owes it to her to return the gesture. This is a Dys who's suddenly become aware that what happened with their mom was wrong, but that people do care what happens to him. He bonds with Tang over engineering and being uncomfortable in their own bodies, but without letting that dysphoria define their actions. They're a unit, and with their combined intelligence - Tang's book-smarts and Dys' knowledge about Vertumna - they're a force to be reckoned with. Dys in this context is better at taking care of himself, but he also reminds Tang to do the same, and it becomes common to see the two napping together in the sunlight. Sometimes the two of them, but often all of the Stratos Kids join in, with Sol right there in the middle of the pile.

Nemmie: oh boy, Anemone. Like Marz, Nemmie will always be Nemmie. But this Nemmie has all of the trauma of her past lives to deal with, and at first? Not great. It manifests in separation anxiety and a near self-destructive need to protect. This is where her friendship with Cal and Tammy proves so extremely valuable, because their combined efforts serve to ground her and keep her fears an anxieties in check. Once out in the open about their memories, and apologies have been made for past rifts, she and Cal (and sometimes Dys) eventually get to discuss their different points of view and why they follow their different beliefs. It's through these chats that both come to a conclusion that neither of them is right or wrong, that it's all about balance - the world isn't black and white, it's grey. For Nemmie, this means she has a much clearer understanding of what and who she's fighting for. She splits her time between the Garrison, athletics, and - surprisingly - the medical wing. Because fighting is all fine and good, but what use is it, if she can't help those who have already been hurt? And isn't it better that, if she's already out fighting and someone gets hurt, she can be there to help them? That's right - it's Paladin Nemmie time, Vertumna's first combat medic. (Of course, the end goal is as little fighting as possible, but with Helios on the way... she'd rather be prepared for anything).

Cal: make way for Vertumna's newest master of agriculture and xeno-botany. Cal is here to stop the famine and possibly help Tang with the shimmer or so help him. If the boy was a good farmer before, he's leveled up considerably now that he's got knowledge of past lives. Much to Noctiluscent's fury, this boy is neck and neck with them in the duel of "feed the humans vs. starve the humans", if not a few steps ahead even. He teams up with Tang, Dys and Tammy to create new food solutions and contingency plans, should anything fail. His parents and Sol's all worry he'll burn out, but fortunately he's got his chats with Nemmie and regular nap-sessions with the other kids to keep him from destroying his own body. And whenever Sol is in need of anything, he'll gladly drop everything to come help them.

Tammy: perhaps the one who benefits the most from remembering her past lives is, surprisingly, our very own Aspartame. Sick and tired of having always been afraid, Tammy finds a new strength in her many new memories. Oh, she still loves the babies, still loves caring for the kids and dreams of motherhood. But her new mindset has her going "why can't I be both mother and brave?", resulting in a new interest in health and medicine. Studying intensely under Antecedent's watchful eye in the kitchen, Tirah's patient teachings in the medlab and enduring Professor Instance's harsh criticism, Tammy eventually grows to be a brilliant doctor in her own right, despite her learning difficulties. It helps that she knows it's working early on. Her efforts with Tang and Dys, helping them communicate and care for their bodies properly and watching the results, is a massive confidence boost, and eventually even Instance must acknowledge her skills.

Sol: Sol is just out here living their best life. Seriously, things have never been this easy, it's awesome! Sure, they got knocked out before they could fix the shields this time, but they're not really feeling up for being an engineer this time around, and anyways it seems like things are going fine? Better than fine, things are great! They don't recall Tang and Dys getting along this well, Tammy went and got cotton candy with them this life, and they're always invited to nap-piles. It's awesome! .......Sol may be a little oblivious this time around, but who can blame them? They've been through a lot, they deserve a nice break from being the hero.

The Helios Kids:

Vace: coming in as a close second to who benefits the most remembering past lives, we've got Vace. Vace, by all means, is still an asshole. He's still an angry kid with a lot of issues, but the memories have tempered that. This is a Vace who comes to Vertumna with a LOT of reality checks pre-installed, and he's a lot more questioning of the actions of the government he's supposed to serve - he just knows not to ask them where someone can hear. He's not quite a human-supremacist anymore. Like Nemmie, it comes down to wanting to protect people, but he's still very unsure of the why and what he's fighting for, and for countless lives all he's really had was the xenos. But he's had his eyes opened to humans being as capable of being monsters as the animals on Vertumna, and yes, that includes himself. He steers as clear of Nemmie as he can, especially once its out in the open that the Stratos kids also know their past lives, and he's got a not-quite-friendship with Rex and Nomi. The end result for him is, if Nemmie's a paladin-like soldier, as more of a fighter or a guardian, with some knowledge about engineering after somehow befriending Dys and Tang while on guard duty during their expeditions to the Ridge.

Rex: Rex is and always will be a good, happy boy. In all honesty, out of all the kids, Rex is the one who changes the least from his knowledge of the past lives. Well, there's one major change: Vace never broke Rex's arm and isn't actively going after him and Nomi-Nomi, but they're not the best of friends. By all means, Rex wants to be friends, but Vace has given enough hints that he's afraid of himself and his past behavior to truly befriend Rex. This all means that Rex is living a life getting beaten up a lot less, which honestly suits him just fine. Instead he's already well on his way to becoming a brilliant caretaker by the time the Heliopause lands, and while he still works construction and opens his bar, he's also seen with the little kids much more early on... and he may be a tad bit attached at the hip with Sol.

Nomi-Nomi: is the textbook definition of "jack of all trades, master of none - but better than a master of none"... well, except art and writing, they're an absolute master at that, but they latched on to all the different things they tried in their past lives and decides to get better at them - heck, they decide to try many more things, and by the time the Heliopause crashes, Nomi's one of the go-to people for smaller issues that need fixing. They like fixing things and exploring with Dys, they like assisting Tang and Cal in the lab and gardens, they like helping out in the kitchen - Nomi-Nomi just likes helping in general. With Marz's help, they make a case for the arts becoming an important part of the colony, and if they tear up a little every time Sol praises them with that genuine wonder in their eyes (as they have so many times before), well... that's just Nomi-Nomi being their usual emotional self.

Bonus - the Gardeners:

Sym: Sym is having the time of his eternal life. No, seriously, this is the most fun he's had in aeons. First the new species landing upon the planet - fascinating! Then the little ones - Dysthymia and Tangent - sneaking outside of the walls, seeking him out and speaking of knowing past lives - curious! And they wish to protect their precious friend. Sure, they want their new home to be safe, but specifically this one friend, because apparently they deserve the world, and they don't know the others remember their past lives - admirable and adorable, like little hopeyes protecting their flock! And then that very same friend comes outside the walls and seeks him out too, and wouldn't you know it, they also remember their past lives? But don't tell Dys and the others, nobody knows about them having this knowledge. Oh - oh no. This is isn't just interesting - it's hilarious, and he is invested. And suddenly there are all these little ones following him around at various times, and he's going to protect these kids with his life now. Noctilucent and the Overseer can come at him if they dare. (He's pretty sure brilliant little Tang and Cal could hack into the Array and stop them from trying, anyways.)

Noctilucent: Noct isn't having a good time. They're having the worst time ever, in fact. Sym better wipe that damn smirk off of his face, because they're at their limit - they want these parasites off of Vertumna, and they want them gone now. But the young parasites attach themselves to Sym like fungi, and then the kid with white and black fur on her head suddenly finds him and starts asking all these questions about the planet that are honestly rather engaging, and would they mind if she brought another friend to ask more questions later, and well... they suppose these little things are rather adorable, in their tenacity. .....oh, for the love of the ancients, stop smirking Sym!

[gsirvitor]

To be trans just means to identify with the gender identity not associated most often with your sex. There is no need to transition to be trans. No one who actually has gender dysphoria can grow out of it. Anyone who “stops having gender dysphoria” simply never had it in the first place. No one under 18 can legally get GRS in the US. Puberty blockers aren’t a bad thing. Hormone blockers being used to preform chemical castration isn’t a valid reason to be against using them to treat gender dysphoria. No one is mutilating children, both because GRS is not used to treat children and GRS isn’t mutilation. Puberty blockers reduce the risk of suicide in trans kids. There no reason to ban their use in trans kids. Helping trans kids isn’t an “attack on children”. You’re fucking evil and your worldview is going to result in the completely preventable suicides of countless innocent children. People like you will be responsible for north deaths than the Nashville shooter ever could have been. I hope you get kidnapped, then raped and tortured. Something like having all your nails ripped out. Then all your fingers frozen/burned off. Then having all of your teeth ripped out while having each nerve pulled and poked. Maybe a little waterboarding. Someone like you who genuinely believes that causing kids to commit suicide is okay / wants to pass legislation that causes kids to commit suicide deserves nothing less.

Trans means across, beyond, through, on the other side of, to go beyond," meaning you cannot be Trans without going from one state to another, this means you cannot be Trans without going through a Transition.

I don't make the rules with language, I simply enforce them.

Eleven studies have been conducted looking at whether gender dysphoria persists throughout childhood. On average 80-94% of children grow out of their Dysphoria and do not continue into adulthood believing they were born into the wrong body.

Claiming they never had Dysphoria because them growing out of it goes against your narrative doesn't prove they never had it, it only proves you're desperate enough to slander children.

No, many children in the US have gotten surgery to lop off their breasts, or have been given puberty blockers and so on.

In fact the Boston children's hospital has been attacked over their willingness to perform these surgeries on children, just because Right wing states are just now banning this does not mean it didn't happen.

Anything used to chemically castrate prisoners should go nowhere near a child.

If you're digging a cavity in your crotch and lining it with stomach lining to mimic a vagina, I'm sorry, that's not a vagina, that's a wound trying to close, stop dilating and accept you've irreversibly mutilated yourself, let the wound heal.

Actually, suicide rates neither drop or rise before or after the use of puberty blockers, it's a steady 41-52% suicide rate regardless of what we do, so I'll not be pressured into letting you have access to children over the hollow threat of suicide.

There's every reason to ban the use of these drugs, one, it'll allow children to develop normally.

Well, since children can't be Trans, then yes, trying to Trans them is an attack on them.

My worldview has been the same one that has helped children lead normal and healthy lives, time tested too, strange that the supposed epidemic of mass suicide never became a threat until your ideological movement wanted access to kids.

Oh no, I'm gonna be responsible for every Trans suicide going forward? That's fine, if you want to blame me go ahead, I'll still sleep quite soundly.

And there you go, all the goodwill out the window, I would never wish rape, torture and death upon anyone, you're mentally ill, get some professional help.

[acearohippo]

I dunno if you've talked about this but what do you think about LiXuan being parents? Would they want kids? :3c

What do I think?? WHAT DO I THINK??? You do not know the can of worms you've just dashed onto the concrete.

Umm... Hmm... I guess there can be an mpreg warning?? *wavey hands* and, perhaps, a mild case of body dysphoria??? you'll see when you get to Tang Xuan's section.

But for now:

Li Ling ABSOLUTELY wants kids. He thought he didn't, then he was forced to volunteer at an elementary school after school program and was suddenly gripped with the intense desire to see a bunch of mini hims running around. He wants an ARMY'S WORTH of his own children.

Not babies though, man's terrified of babies. He's the type of parent that really excels at parenting once their kid enters school. Before that? Lost™, Confused™, Perpetually-in-an-Extistential-Crisis™™™. And once the kid hits the teenage years, they're practically ready and solid enough to tussle and throw hands with, so he goes from stern but nurturing and doting to "these hands rated e for everyone who don't CATCH THEY ATTITUDE". He gets along SO WELL with children, too, that while people are shocked at first on how enthusiasticly he wants to be a father, they realised rather quickly that it makes a lot of sense given how into it he gets when playing with children and how he has a permanent spot as a substitute teacher (which he did the work to get credentials for) at several local elementary schools.

As for Tang Xuan, I guess we have unlocked a Personal Backstory Headcannon. Many of you know that I have Tang Xuan's gender as intersex. What y'all don't know is I don't headcannon him as trans. It's a very long and drawn out backstory, but the gist is that Tang Xuan was raised a little boy, hit puberty, grew boobs and started getting (sporadicly) periods, which had people around him trying to "be progressive" and call him by feminine pronouns and Mei, and that caused a bit of an identity crisis. It's less that he transitioned and more that he had to really hammer it down to his folks and peers (at the time) that he wasn't a girl and the new additions didn't change his perception. And then he became an esper and that took way more precedence over trying to define who he was to others. This leaves our boy in a very strange sort of limbo. He loves his body and takes care of it. Sometimes he wears compression clothes to mask most of the curves, but that's mostly due to his active lifestyle, rather than any dysphoria or discomfort. But, growing up after reaching puberty, there were a lot of... Let's say dated remarks on his changes. Lots of "oh good, you can have babies!" And "now you'll be able to be a real woman". You know, nothing inherently wrong nor demeaning, just misplaced platitudes that didn't factor in how he might feel.

Does he want kids? Yeah, sure, it'd be nice in a decade or so. But does he want to have them? He's not sure. The idea doesn't entirely ick him, but he also doesn't feel comfortable "playing into the role" that others assigned for him. He could adopt but he knows he'd want a child or two that came from half of his genes.

All this to say, that LiXuan will be having their own kids, but not after some heavy discussion and planning. It helps that, once Tang Xuan gets pregnant, he is forced into solitude to be doted on by Li Ling and their families and closest friends. So when they do emerge in society, it causes mass confusion and the focus is more on "WHERE DID THIS BABY COME FROM???" rather than "TANG XUAN WAS PREGNANT???"

And, yes, they're both solid parents. Definitely awkward and young, making very common and- usually non life-threatening- mistakes. Yes they were those parents that shipped their toddlers off to daycare just so they can get a break from them. No shame there, they need it. Li Ling is that parent educators wish took disciplining more seriously (if no one ends up in the hospital, s'all good yeah?) and Tang Xuan is that parent educators think isn't invested enough in their kid (he's still a model, on top of being a high ranking union officer. hours are wild and free time is sporadic).

They both have to take up family counseling once their kids become teenagers because oh boy, karma is a b#tch and their kids- of course- have the worst of both of their personalities x10 due to raging teenage hormones.

But you know what? Their kids grow up well enough, knowing they are loved and will always have a safe space within their dads' arms (and extra arms) and once the hormones settle as they become adults and go through uni and enter the workforce, Li Ling and Tang Xuan are pleased to see that their kids still talk to them and seek them out for advice or randomly drop by to hang out (and steal their leftovers and tupperware). All that hard work pays off.

They, later on, decide to become foster parents so they can still impact a child's life without needing to relive the horrors of raising them from birth to graduation.

[thefirstknife]

@aislinavalbane

Aislin. Hello. I would talk to you like adults that we are, but you have made your essay statement and blocked everyone who may disagree with you, despite openly saying that you welcome people "tearing it apart." I will be as brief as possible and focus on a few points only so I will not be tearing it apart. You're lucky that way.

You've given me no choice but to post this in the tag so all of D2 Tumblr will know your shit.

First of all, I don't think you've read The Callout Post(TM) with adequate reading comprehension or perhaps you've read it and didn't fully understand the issues with things me and another user brought up. Reminder.

But let's move past that one. In your essay, you have stated the following:

If there was someone I was interacting with who showed they were racist, bigoted, transphobic, or even fascist (I see that last one being used quite a bit and I don’t think you all are using that in the correct context, but I digress) then I would simply stop interacting with them and block them.

Really? Okay, so you didn't notice any of the bigotry in the actual post that you claim you've read. Maybe I just wasn't pedantic enough. But by the Traveler, can I be pedantic. Thank you for giving me the chance.

Transphobia 1 (anti-puberty blockers and gender affirming healthcare for trans people and youth in particular, paired with the "REEEE" which is often used as an ableist shortcut to mock autistic people, for good measure.) Transphobia 2 (reblogging a post celebrating the ban on trans women in sport and specifically being rude to one particular trans woman for no reason other than pure and utter hatred, calling trans women "men," anti-puberty blockers.) Transphobia 3 (supposed "gotcha" over how kids should not be allowed to express gender dysphoria when they're young because minors can't buy guns. Stay classy at the time of yet another mass shooting that happened in your country where elementary school children have been killed.) Transphobia 4 (just one of the posts supporting Gina Carano, a known transphobe that I have written about in my original post. Just as an addition, here's some stuff about Gina Carano being antisemitic. Ice in the tags noting that Gina was the only good actress in Star Wars. Really? The antisemitic transphobe?)

Is this enough proof of transphobia or do you need more? Is there a specific number of transphobic beliefs your friend has to agree with and spread around for you to acknowledge she's transphobic?

Homophobia (literally for no reason saying that people calling characters like Din, Luke or Han gay is "the stupidest crap she's ever heard." Why are these headcanons bothering her? Answer quickly. Here's Mark Hamill, Luke's actor, affirming people's HCs about Luke being gay if they so desire.)

Asking if supporting Attack on Titan makes her a Nazi (yes.)

Phew, that's a lot of tough topics to go through. Let's take a break with something light. Here's her anti-Crow post that's actually related to Destiny where she keeps calling him Uldren and saying she hasn't done any quests "helping Uldren" and she doesn't want Bungie to force her to side with him. As far as I know, you support Crow. This is a minor nitpick, but I am being pedantic after all.

Xentari is currently doing the same as you, supporting Ice-6 and claiming there's no bigotry involved anywhere and you're all a nice little support group who support other bigots. And I thought you all just support each other no matter what, but Xentari answered an ask tonight and this was reblogged by one of you who made a sideblog specifically to engage with this discourse and be transphobic. Transphobia in the tags, Xentari liked the reply so I will assume she agrees with the transphobic reply and transphobic tags. This person, whichever one of you it is, has called trans women "men" before and was already transphobic before.

Xentari has been particularly bothersome and outright stalking one of my friends despite my friend not wanting to interact with them. Xentari said my friend is "hiding behind the block button." Curious. Aislin, you're doing the same. This will be a tough one for Xentari to parse through: on one hand, hiding behind a block button is bad, but on the other hand her bestie is doing it too.

Extremely suspicious that both Xentari and you went to dig out stuff posted by trans people, with you, Aislin, specifically not just clipping bits of text but also implying the text wasn't AI generated. And then defending yourself by saying you wrote the person "claimed" it was AI generated. It being AI generated isn't a claim. It's a fact. OP didn't claim anything, he stated a fact. The text is AI generated.

You don't find it funny, whatever. It's not your place to police trans and LGBT+ people about which jokes they will make about themselves. You don't care about that at all. You only care about a post making fun of Cayde because falsely accusing Cayde, a fictional character, of sexism is worse than your friends supporting human rights being taken away.

Your next point I want to address:

Post to donation sites for those who have the means to and may like to contribute to.  Especially for those in the US and Ukraine, cause things are crazy and scary right now all around and backing organizations and people who want to make a real difference and help people is far more helpful than going after random blogs on Tumblr.

Oh things are scary in the US right now? I see you're pro-choice so I will assume you are referring to that.

The person you're willing to die on the hill for is not.

Anti-abortion 1 Anti-abortion 2 Anti-abortion 3 Anti-abortion 4

For as long as you support people who actively made this happen by voting against abortion, you are at fault for what is happening. Whatever little posts and statements you're making about being pro-choice are futile for as long as you're coddling people who want human rights being taken away and chalking it up to "different opinions." This is what "different opinions" on human rights have done. Really "crazy and scary."

Don't fucking dare say that you can still be friends with people who have "different opinions" when those "opinions" are literally about whether or not human beings should have bodily autonomy and the right to choose. Human rights are not an opinion. You cannot be friends with people over this. Different opinions are about what's your favourite colour, not whether or not millions of people will die because your bestie is voting for their rights to be taken away.

I hope I have provided you with sufficient evidence at least for transphobia and anti-abortion stuff. You have explicitly stated that you will stop interacting with and block people who support any kind of bigotry and I believe I have given enough links and explanations and links for further reading to prove this.

If you still can't see transphobia, you are a transphobe.

I will wait with bated breath to see you publicly denounce your friendship with transphobes and transphobe supporters that you are currently very friendly with. As per your own admission that you will.

I also hope that you are hardcore donating to those organisations since you've spent a lot of time coddling people who are responsible for this happening to your country. Links to these organisations that Bungie promoted, for your ease of access:

URGE

Religious Coalition for Reproductive Choice

NARAL Pro-Choice America Foundation

In Your Own Voice

Trans Lifeline (hope you have a huge donation to this one in particular given the scope of transphobia exhibited by your (hopefully former) friends)

[uncanny-tranny]

hey im 18 and grew up in a very sheltered, religious, homophobic and transphobic household. i always knew i was attracted to women (i was born a female) and thought i was attracted to guys too. but now that im out of the house and living my own life, ive begun to reevaluate a lot about myself and have come to the realization that im only attracted to guys because i want to be one myself. but im honestly so new to the discovery that ive really overwhelmed myself. and i was just wondering, if youre comfortable, if you could tell the ups and downs of realizing youre trans yourself? if not thats ok!! im literally such a baby to this all i grew up having no access to knowing anything abt this and now im just. desperate to understand haha

Hi, and I hope you're all good! I've definitely been where you've been, and sometimes it takes years to truly come to grips with all the nuances of who you are - so where you are now is a beautiful thing.

For me, the positives of realizing my transness was when I could say, "so that's why I feel this way! That's what my feelings meant!" For years, I thought everybody felt upset/discomfort about being a certain gender (this was my dysphoria, but I digress). It was weird, to me, to find out that people felt comfortable in the social roles they were given, and at the time it was just social roles because we were kids. I felt so much peace as a young teen when I found out what it meant to be trans. I thought, "this is what I've been trying to say!" It freed me. And don't get me started about when I took the plunge to start being true to myself in transition! That's a feeling you can't do justice to to describe with words alone. When I could transition how I wanted, I felt so much peace, like a soft wave washing over my feet.

I think the cons came down to the anguish of being physically and socially unable to live up to the expectations which my family and society at large expected of me. I wanted to be loved, but I learned that sometimes I had to sacrifice other people's love in order for me to live happily and to even live in the first place. It can be lonely to be trans, I won't sugar-coat this. But this loneliness changed me. The fear I feel about being trans has changed me. It isn't always safe or happy to be trans, but this isn't your or my fault. Social stigma and undue hatred for trans people is not trans peoples faults. I won't say that you'll be stronger for anything you experience, per se, but I will say you can grow for the better. I think these negative experiences I have had have made me more compassionate, even if it was a source of trauma.

Being trans is a beautiful thing, and it's beautiful to be you. It may be hard, but you are worth fighting for. I know right now might be scary, but please take it from somebody who was right were you are: life can always get more peaceful. You won't always be where you are now, and I hope one day, you will be right where you want to be. This life is yours, I hope you are able to live for you. I wish you love and peace

[authoralexharvey]

🍀 - What thoughts or emotions that didn’t make sense to your past self make sense now that you know you’re queer? & 🧡 - How has the way you presented yourself (ex. Clothing, hairstyle, etc.) changed since you realized you were queer? pls!!

Hey Andi!! These are great questions ^^

🍀- What thoughts or emotions that didn't make sense to your past self make sense now that you know you're queer?

Sooo I'm kinda conflicted how to answer this one. I was heavily sheltered as a child. Like, I had homeschooling centers I went to, but in a group of like. Ten kids max there's not a whole lot you talk about that isn't video games. It's not until I went to public school in seventh grade that I even knew what being gay was or that it was an option. And it's not even like I was I'm a homophobic environment, either. I just had such little interaction with other kids, especially of my AG, that I didn't have a chance to feel those feelings, let alone explore them.

Anyway. Middle school. I pretty much realized I had Queer Emotions (at least in terms of sexuality) at the same time that I was in an environment where people could help me understand that.

Gender was a little,,, weirder.

I was always considered a tomboy, to be honest. All my friends were men and we all played video games or make believe in the yard. My barbie phase lasted like... 6 months and typically involved brutal scenarios and storytelling when I had it. Aside from my presentation, I was never ever "stereotypically feminine". And like. I didn't have much of a need to question things as a child. Once I hit puberty, it got weirder. I'm not binary transgender, but it's like the moment puberty hit my body no longer made sense to me. For the longest time, I attributed it to it being puberty and NO ONE being happy to be in that phase of life etc.

It's not until like. My junior year of high school that I knew what being trans was? Let alone being nonbinary. But once I learned about those concepts it was a pretty neat transition of "oh okay that makes sense. That's what I am"... just been a matter of OTHET people accepting this about me.

On the whole, though, like I said I was ignorant for a lot of my life and tended to have realizations and understanding at almost the exact same time. I'd say I had more "Ah that makes sense" moments about my neurodivergency, if I'm being completely honest.

🧡 how has the way you've presented yourself changed since you realized you were queer?

A couple of different ways. I HATED skirts and dresses as a teen, and as an older kid I think. I really had a very lengthy and awkward ugly duckling phase and was dealing with a lot of dysphoria and dysmorphia (thanks, eating disorder)... I still don't like skirts or dresses, tbh, but take the approach of "my aim is to be hot however that feels on a given day" now that I like. Feel better about myself. I also wore a lot of baggy clothes as a kid and whatnot and wear less of that now that I feel less of a need to "hide" myself, I think. Also also, I lean way more masculine now that I'm in environments where I can do that. My default outfit is a t-shirt and jeans with a MTV button up shirt I have (that is too tight to button up BUT looks great open)... I'm actually wearing that tomorrow for pride.

I don't know I think in general I avoided things as a kid for discomfort reasons and now that I'm no longer so uncomfortable, I feel better about dressing more fem or whatever. That said, 85% I'm going for as neutral or masculine as possible.

[amygdala-suzanna]

I'm gonna rant about my identity, trauma, girlfriends, Life Is Strange, and Gwen Stacy for a bit.

"nerdy middle-class trans-lesbian white-girl" is probably like the most inoffensive label someone could have. It probably even sounds fragile to a lot of people. But that is what I am.

I'm definitely not normal though, people often find my interests disturbing when I'm allowed to go on about them. Unhinged sadistic demons and gothic fantasy blade-wielding blood-covered warriors are certainly my favorite kind of characters to present myself as when given the opportunity to roleplay. My heart rate doubles when my girlfriend describes how they'd allow me to bite down on their neck. I love horror, being scared and being scary, and it's not pleasant to most, but that is what I like.

The thing that comforts me about being discomforting like that is that there's nothing for me to prove to anyone. Those close to me can just smile and laugh at my absurdity. Even better if they find it exciting. But, all my life with my parents I always feel like I have to prove something to them in order to justify asking for anything. This has carried over to my love life. I really struggle with asking my partners for anything. I developed a habit of avoiding confrontation with my parents by simply doing things based on my presumptions and hoping they'll be okay. It's pretty bad.

At four years old I had the displeasure of learning what I was. This was traumatizing, because I knew I was inside. In my dreams as a kid I always saw myself as a girl. When I learned that I was born a boy because of my body something broke inside me and I have been in and out of dissociation ever since. There used to be four alters in our system. The one that played the role of "boy" was evicted from the system some time in the 10th grade when we realized that there was serious gender dysphoria with the three other feminine alters inside and the masculine body. Sam fucking killed him and I'm glad she did.

When I came out to the then-girlfriend, she rejected me, hard. I had to spend like 4 hours on a phone call with her convincing her that I was the same person, unaware that I was lying to her more and more with every minute that passed. Because we were not the same, not remotely.

That relationship ended poorly. I still hate her for stealing my life for those 3 years. I hate that my experience playing Life Is Strange was with her, and I hated that she made me feel bad about wanting Max to kiss Chloe. Fuck her. I pored over so much Pricefield fanart that night and it made stronger impacts on my memory than anything you've ever done for me.

When I came out to my parents, of course, I had to prove it to them. They didn't believe me for the first two years, of course, they had to send me to a therapist who just told them exactly what I told them two years prior. Then they didn't believe her either and sent me to another one who came to the same conclusion. Guess fucking what, dad, I'm a woman and I always have been. Don't ever fucking say that you "lost" your son, you never had one, it was just a stupid fucking alter playing make-believe because it thought it had no other choice until Andrew told me he had a trans friend.

Fuck.

Watching the new Spiderverse recently and seeing Gwen's arc with her dad hit it perfectly for me. "Wow, look at this trans teenage girl who loves punk rock and lives in a world purveyed by a living watercolor painting that feels like a dream of color and melancholy and identity. She's just like me for real." I'm probably just like 90% of the other trans women seeing this in the theater in thinking that. I wonder how many other saw that aesthetic and were viscerally reminded of the overall aesthetic of Life Is Strange. Guess what, that's another story about a nerdy white girl with a savior complex trying to prove herself to everyone while just trying to be in love.

Teen white girls with identity crises and issues about proving themselves are not in short supply in American fiction by any means, but fuck it still hurts my heart seeing Gwen's dad come around to listening to her. I know my dad eventually came around just the same, but he didn't do it in a way that didn't hurt. I just wish it didn't hurt me and make be bitter and never want to go back home.

It would be really nice if I got to be the teenage girl I always wanted to be. I suppose that's what I'm doing now, in college. With the girlfriends and dates and all. It still hurts that Brynn decided she doesn't want to date a poly girl. I love her so much and I even enjoyed spending time with her family. I know we are still great friends, but that space between us does still make me sad. I'm grateful for Lil asking to be girlfriends just in time for Brynn to decide that, and Lil is really sweet and makes me really happy, but the sadness isn't gonna go away soon, I feel.

Melancholy helps get the emotions out at least. I think probably like two people will read this post until this point. Maybe Acorn if anyone. If you are here, you're a real friend, I knew I could count on you to pay attention to my stupid vent posts. Weird to find out here that Brynn isn't dating me anymore, isn't it. Oh well.

[justanotherfanwriter]

Just saw your new ask and I just... Had to process it all.

Like, your so right! The fandom dose mostly zero into the traumatic junk, wich I still appreciate but these are teenagers. Hormonal, sweaty, teenagers.

So it would just add to all the drama when their dealing with it all.

And the poor girls! I'm sure you have heard of the McClintock effect, so all these poor lady's need to deal with figuring out how to get back home and to get though the pain.

I can just totally imagine Gus and Hunter freaking out and running back and forth while all the girls are just on the couch, with chips, watching TV.

And honestly, I don't think Hunter would even know this happens to lady's. So when he just notices multiple piles of blood while taking out the trash, he freaks.

and It gose to a point with him confronting and pressing everyone about it until Camila has to set him and Gus down for the conversation.

Let alone finding out girls younger than them, have to deal with such pain each month? Gus and him are on there hands and knees, worshipping the girls by now.

( plus Hunters still trying to get over the thought of Willow in a little too revealing dress.)

Anon, okay, stay with me because omg you've given me so much more to think about:

Right off the bat, while I think what you're saying is totally likely, I feel it would be funnier if Hunter knew what a period was because he's a smart kid, and I'm assuming he knows anatomy and basic biology, but he doesn't actually know what a period is. I hardly doubt a coven scout would want to talk to their technical child-superior about their pms lmao, so, he's aware of it, but in a "damn, that's insane, anyway, moving on..." kind of way.

Gus would know too, but that's because he's been friends with Willow for a while now, and when you're that close with someone, you start to know what's up. Like, when I was younger, my little brothers' fukcin knew when I was on my period. '

Anyway, I envision it going one of two ways:

1 --> it ends up being like that Modern Family Skit where all the girls get their period at the same time, and Gus realizes what's going on and has to inform Hunter why everyone's so emotional. (Here's a link: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1AkjhcImkPs&ab_channel=ABC)

2 --> Hunter starts noticing something weird. Like a bloody stain on a bed sheet while he's helping Ms. Camila, or more abnormal trash in the trash can, or the way the girls discretely talk to each other, and he's 99% convinced they're colluding against him and Gus. And then one day, he's just like, oh shit, "Captain, is your butt bleeding!?!"

And poor Willow sinks to the ground mortified in the local Aldi's because she's bled through her dress while Amity rips Hunter a new one, and Luz goes into protective friend mode to get Willow out of the store without further embarrassment.

When Gus (cause I think it's just so funny if Gus explains things to Hunter #brobesties) finally explains why Willow is pissed off at him, I think that's when Hunter's like, "oh shit, and they get that every month??"

(((like srsly there is just something so funny about a 12 yr old being a 16 yr old's life coach)))

And then cue, every month the boys freaking out, and the girls chilling on the couch like you said because that's funny as hell.

also also also:

I love when ppl h/c hunter as trans ftm. I'm like perf, awesome, love the rep.

So anyway, wouldn't it be just fucking heartbreaking if Hunter slowly reveals to the others that no one taught him what a period was? Like, every month, he just thinks he's chosen to suffer, and the girls to teach their friend what no adult was kind enough to teach him?? Or like, let's say Hunter figures out what a period is (because, like I said before, he's probably too smart not to), but he's still under the general assumption that you have to suffer through your period, and the girls introduce him to heating pads and pain killers, chocolate, and just "absolutely go crazy me-days." And sure, the dysphoria may kick in a little, but it still feels nice being accepted and not so alone anymore.

And then there's Gus, who's just a 12 yr old, so still a lil stupid when it comes to developing bodies, and he's just like, "guys! I can't wait to get my first period so we can all be in this together!" And they gotta break it to him, which ends up being a very dark day at the Noceda household.

((also lol if Willow wore anything revealing, I think he'd be the embodiment of "I am looking respectfully" and his proper guard etiquette would kick in))

[erigold13261]

Hello, I am back again. I know you might be tired of these long winding asks, and I apologize. However, I cannot contain the Category Autism Event Level 7 TM in my mind, or I will explode. (Also, I wish you get that job you've been wanting to get <3 <3)

Here we go again into Crossover Land.

I just realized this. Haibara Yu's kanji name is 灰原雄、and the kanji that represents his given name is 雄, which not only means "brave", but also "male." As in the biological male. And... I like to imagine little Yu choosing the kanji bc he was a Real Boy. Older Yu thinks it was silly of him to do so. (But likes his name anyway.) (Also Yu is an androgynous name, so they might have just changed the kanji to represent who he was.)

Speaking of which, Yu was the first binary trans kid Gwen had ever known. And vice versa. Imagine the shock and joy when they find out that.

Yu was stealth trans until very recently.

Idk how Yu and Gwen found out, perhaps they were both going into the doctor's office for their hormones? (Yes Gwen started Estrogen while in Nueva York. No note has not gotten notes dad's consent.) (Maybe they wouldn't allow that to happen, but Gwen's body dysphoria was pretty bad.)

Commence a "Spider-Man Pointing at Each Other" or a "Spider-Woman and Ash-Man Pointing at Each Other" meme moment.

After a few days, Gwen gives Yu a friendship bracelet. A pink, blue, and white one.

Yu does not know what it means. And thinks that Gwen here has a crush on him, and wants him to wear her colors. But doesn't she like Miles????

Gwen realizes Yu is mistaking something drastically.

She picks up her phone, and points at the trans flag.

Yu did not know the trans flag, and gets more confused.

Gwen starts to frantically point at the trans flag more, to no avail.

He calls for Peni.

Peni comes and explains the misunderstanding.

Now Yu and Gwen wear matching friendship bracelets. T4T friendship for the win!

Well, now more people wanted friendship pride flag bracelets.

So Gwen (Yu, and Miles too) decide to make a bunch of them. A bi one (Miles), a gay man one (Satoru and later Ganke), an AroAce one (Nanami), a nonbinary one (Suguru), two agender ones, (Noir and Shoko), a genderqueer one (Margo), a genderfluid one (Peter Porker), two rainbow pride ones (Peni and Hobie). (I want to know Pav and Gayatri's queer HCs bc they made them one too)

Team bonding hurray!

Another less happy HC.

I wondered why in this world, Japan isn't known for its robotics or technology, and instead J-1, Vandelay, and that UK robotics company are.

Perhaps in this world, Japan fell behind after the economic collapse of the 1990s.

And instead maybe, they are known for people. Powered individuals. (JJK canon explains how sorcerers and cursed spirits are far more common in Japan than in other areas of the world.)

This is why the Gojo clan are rich. And Satoru is the first one in 400 years to be born with blues powerset.

This makes him important. As an asset. As a way to get on top of the food chain.

Then they need to control the boy.

They did just that. Control his friends, the places that he goes to. Every single move so that he can be on top.

It didn't work. Now the boy was hanging out with that Ripoff (Suguru), and that Freak (sorry Shoko).

(Shoko's healing is a good asset though. Might as well have them get married for more blood.) (HC that Shoko has a parent with an object head, making them less valid in that world)

Satoru even was in love with that Ripoff! How dare him! And even Shoko was in a scheme of... what?

Now he was useless, at least with that mindset.

Then Miguel and Olivia came in. Promised to help the boy and others control their powers.

They did not want Satoru or any of them around anymore. They agreed.

Yu was already friends with Nanami, but only heard of Satoru and Suguru before. As he was about to leave his home, he found a bus coming to him.

There was the SaSiSu three, and Nanami.

Yu is confused, but he leaves anyway.

But why weren't they having any luggage? Wearing their school uniforms? And sleeping?

(Olivia wanted them in full shape. An heir of the infamous Gojo clan was going to be an important asset that shouldn't be chipped or cracked.)

... sorry for this HC. I think it's pretty dark.

And a quicker one.

After Hobie realizes that Satoru was in a screwed-up home life, they decide to be a bit nicer to blues.

They know what it is like to be mistreated. And it understands that being a rich person does not equal happiness. (Something that Cyril knows too.)

Taught him music he was never allowed to listen to.

Now Satoru gets taught the drums from Gwen.

Blue loves it!

... sorry for the ask dump. (Might return for more haha/hj) Have a nice day/night!

Lol, don’t apologize! They are actually really fun to read (and now I am getting tiktoks with JJK references in them that I can kinda sorta understand lol)

Also thanks for the luck on my job! Hopefully I get it too (at the moment of writing this I am still waiting for a call back, will call back myself tomorrow afternoon if I don’t get one in the morning).

Anyway! Time to answer!

-Yu’s kanji: That makes me think of nonbinary people who name themselves after nouns for some reason. I don’t know why, but it’s a nice thing to think about since it was/is a name that makes them happy, and I’m glad to hear even if older Yu thinks it’s a little silly, he is still happy with his choice in name!

-Yu and Gwen: Oh wow, yeah! That is true! Gwen is just surrounded by a bunch of trans people who aren’t really binary trans. Didn’t even notice that till now! Neat!

But I can see the two bonding over that. Like it is nice to be surrounded by all kinds of queer people, but sometimes you want someone in an even more similar spot as you. I definitely think if Yu meets Remi he will be even more happy to meet another ftm trans person. Which might make Gwen feel left out a little, but I can see her finding out Tatiana is a trans woman, or even meeting Zimelu and just trying to get to know them and their experiences.

Honestly Gwen and Yu looking up to Tatiana and Neon J as elder binary trans individuals is a nice idea for me to think about. Even though those two don’t really flaunt their transness, they would definitely be willing to talk about it to make Gwen and Yu feel better about their own experiences.

-Stealth trans: Oh yeah, Yu and Neon J could probably have a really good conversation about their experiences as being stealth trans. Like Neon J literally only came out publicly for his kids’ sake as they were getting harassment from interviewers. Yu (hopefully) came out on his own to be more open about his transness but would still probably benefit from hearing about Neon’s experiences. I think Tatiana was never stealth, but also never fully flaunted it. She would tell people if they ask but wouldn’t just be telling without provocation.

-Hormones: I think you would definitely need parental consent at Gwen’s age. Well also Yu’s age, I think you said he would be 15-16. So I can see Yu getting parental consent and being able to go get hormones, but Gwen really wouldn’t. Jess would definitely have fought for Gwen to get them, but it would be shut down because Gwen isn’t emancipated and it could cause problems for Nueva York to give hormones.

Maybe Gwen could get puberty blockers at the very least without parental consent, like that would have been the compromise of Jess pushing for hormones. Though Gwen would definitely be given the proper clothes, accessories, other social transitioning options for note to have even if note couldn’t have hormones.

I can see Gwen talking with a nurse at the Nueva York doctor’s office and Yu overhears and wants to ask or talk to Gwen maybe (would Yu understand enough English at this point if he only knew Japanese?). Maybe he sees Gwen in some trans flag outfit or with a pin of some sort and that’s how he realizes. 

I don’t think Gwen could have been the one to figure it out because Yu was stealth (maybe note had an idea just from experience) but I do think Yu would be the one to figure it out in whatever way he does because Gwen is a bit more open about her transness than Yu is (at least at the moment she is more open about it).

-Point Meme: Yeah, if they both wear trans flags at one point, that would definitely be how they find out and react lol.

-Bracelet: For once Gwen is glad to have been forced into Nueva York’s arts-and-craft room (also I should probably read ahead because I could combine points like this and the last one, but I like reading asks point by point lol).

-Crush?: (okay yeah I need to read the next few points lol, so like this one point encompasses  the rest of the points until the break in paragraph)

OOOOH! So Yu doesn’t know what the trans flag is! Okay! So that wouldn’t be how they found out! Interesting!

Well, however they found out, Yu thinking Gwen has a crush on him because he doesn’t understand is kinda cute. Maybe he thinks her and Miles are just friends (or maybe he knows a bit about polyamory, probably not the word for it, and thinks this is some kind of relationship like that).

Imagine him going to Nanami for advice as to what to do and his aroace ass is of absolutely no help to Yu lol. 

Yu ends up letting Gwen know he thinks she has a crush on him and she so panicked (not in a bad way because maybe she could like Yu, but Yu was right that she likes Miles right now and that is who she wants). So it’s like 10 minutes of charades and maybe Gwen saying colors in different languages or trying to say something but all she knows is like 1 year of Spanish and a few words in French or something, so she is just being even more confusing to Yu.

So she quickly leaves and drags in Peni. Gwen is super embarrassed, but Yu probably laughs at the whole situation (Peni is definitely laughing) and it’s a fun story everyone ends up finding out about. Suguru or Satoru just screaming “rosa” and “azul” to be brats and embarrass Gwen a bit when she walks by, causing a small fight between them and Hobie who (although also found the situation hilarious) is willing to fight on behalf of Gwen lol.

Anyway, once all of that is settled, you better believe the group spent a ton of time pleading for computer time so they could look up flag colors and identities to make sure all these bracelets are accurate and in the right order!

Also, I don’t have any queer headcanons for Gayatri and Pavitr that are set in stone. I do like T4T or Bi4Bi, but honestly what if they were both aroace and together. Maybe one is aroace and the other is something else. I don’t know why I want one to be aroace, or at least asexual, but I do lol. I mean heck, I wouldn’t even mind he/him butch lesbian Pav and BiAce Gayatri. I want these two to be weird in their identities but also totally super confident and happy in themselves. So yeah, nothing concrete with these two, but they love each other and are weird but happy.

-Power/Tech Japan:

I will be honest before reading ALL of these points, the reason Japan doesn’t have a big robotics company in this AU (at the moment) is just because I haven’t found the right media to fill it. Honestly, Vandelay could have easily been in Japan, someone on one of my HFR posts said they personally saw Vandelay Tech as Japanese, while I personally saw it as in California for some reason. So it could have been a Japanese industry, but just how I saw it, it was put in the United States lol. (now I shall read the rest of the points :3)

There very much could be a robotics company in Japan (there’s definitely SOME, but maybe not to the level as the main 3), but I actually like the idea that some places just give birth to stronger powered individuals! I always wanted to think about how some places give different abilities, different elementals, different bodies (like object heads). Like I think South Africa is a place that has a lot of powerful people or that Korea might have more people with light based powers. So Japan being a place where more powerful people are from is something that could absolutely happen!

I can also see the Gojo clan being rich because of this. That is something I haven’t explored all that much is how powered individuals do tend to have more influence and say in the world around them. So families with very useful powers are definitely going to be using those privileges to get an upper hand in life.

Poor Satoru though. Having blues life be fully controlled is awful. I’m glad blue was able to find time to become friends with Suguru and Shoko (even if they did end up doing a scheme that probably irreparably damaged someone because of overhealing, draining power, and matter manipulation).

Shoko and Satoru potentially being in an arranged marriage would have been such a cool story line to look at. Maybe the Gojo family didn’t have any better option at their disposal so they would have been willing to overlook Shoko’s object-headed parent because of its power, but after the scheme went wrong and showed just how far Satory strayed from the family path, the family would have never wanted that girl’s blood in the family bloodline.

Once the scheme was brought to light (and probably brought bad recognition to the Gojo family), you better believe the family was willing to pay Miguel to take Satoru and try to “fix” blue into being a better kid that would follow orders. Nueva York absolutely got a big donation from the family to make sure this happened (also I just imagine Olivia having to contain her excitement at the thought of studying these powers and then Miguel had to contain his excitement when he realized how much money was being donated to Nueva York).

I wonder if Yu and Nanami tried talking with the SaSiSu three on the ride to Nueva York. I can imagine the three not being very talkative to anyone outside the three of them at that moment. Everything went wrong for them and they were now being shipped to who-knows-where. Definitely not the most happy ride any of them have had.

(also don’t apologize, it’s all good! Trust me, I have had more dark headcanons as well as people sending me in way darker stuff. So you’re all good!)

-Hobie lightens up:

Oh definitely. Once Hobie realizes that Satoru isn’t just a spoiled rich kid, they absolutely start trying to be nicer (not to say that the two still don’t bicker and fight a little bit, but nothing like what it initially was in the beginning).

Speaking of Cyril, I wonder if Hobie ends up talking to Cyril and telling him about Satoru Gojo. I can see Cyril knowing a bit of that family, maybe his mom knew them personally or something. She is a very famous singer with a voice similar to Gayatri, which is a very strong power to have. Perhaps there could be a neat little connection there somehow.

Anyway, Hobie and Gwen teaching Satoru rock and metal music is something I really like! Especially if Hobie shows Satoru some Ex-Jay music that is in Japanese. Imagine the three singing in Japanese to rock songs! That would be really fun! (Gwen doesn’t understand what she is singing and Hobie knows the gist of what it is singing. Satoru would know exactly what is being said and loves that blue is able to actually experience something with others that blue can fully understand without having to translate).

I wonder what instrument Satoru would like the best. I can imagine blue knowing how to play a more classical instrument because of blues family, so maybe something less traditional would be to blues liking. (for some reason I see Satoru in the middle of a room just dancing and shaking maracas around and it is very funny to me)

______________________________________

That’s all I have for now! thanks for the info dump! It’s always fun reading stuff like this! And honestly this is the perfect propaganda to push me into watching this show lol! Once I get time I honestly really do want to watch the show. It’s obviously not going to be exactly like this since this is an AU, but just seeing stuff on tiktok and your explanation of canon is starting to be enough for me to want to see what the show is really about! :3

You have a good day/night as well!

[autigender-culture-is]

Hey, uh, sorry if this is a lot but I've been struggling with my identity lately (I'm an autistic queer person but my issue is gender rn).

(tw: probably transphobia or internalized transphobia? Not intentional tho)

I've always IDed as my AGAB for a number of reasons... When I was little, I didn't really get gender and didn't care whether I was dressed as a pirate or a princess and I played with all the different 'gendered' toys, but kids are just like that and it's dumb to put weight onto it. Then there was the whole chr/stian thing that got put onto me, and believe me when I say they did not accept trans/enby people and wouldn't acknowledge intersex people. When I was chr/stian I spent a long time believing in the gender binary and rationalising trans people in a transmed/truscum way... Then I grew up and I left and I discovered that I'm m-spec, and now I'm GNC. It wasn't until a few years ago I found out gender can be a 'feeling'. The idea of people being gender fluid or agender is perplexing to me because I'm pretty sure you need a frame of reference for binary genders to understand those.

So, I've been thinking about gender lately and wondering if it's possible to not be cis when you've always IDed as your AGAB? I have no idea about gender as a feeling, what it's supposed to 'feel' like - or how you can feel dysphoria or euphoria for gender. Gender as a social construct might impact the aesthetics I use on any given day but 'my' gender doesn't (I kind of alternate between masculine punk looks, feminine kawaii and neutral goth looks). So... Main question:

Do I need to understand gender or have a coherent explanation of my own to ID as autigender and use multiple pronouns? I feel like I'd need a 'good enough' reason to change my identifiers and I feel like I don't have one.

Nah, you don’t need to understand your gender at all. In fact, that’s one of the biggest defining autigender experiences! And one’s pronouns don’t have anything to do with gender! Anyone can use any pronouns. You don’t need any reason other than “This makes sense for me and makes me feel good.”

[therapy101]

I've recently seen a number of posts that suggested that many symptoms of ASD, BPD, and ADHD may overlap between 2 (or all 3) of the disorders - emotion dysregulation, poor social cues, lack of and hyper-focus, rejection sensitive dysphoria, etc. I'd be curious to hear more about the differences and similarities between these disorders - and also a bit about how the lines are drawn (or what you think of that process); I know you've talked about depression/anxiety and bipolar/psychosis before.

huh. those are not three diagnoses I would have put together, so I need to think about this one a little so this might be a little ramble-y. 

it’s important to keep in mind that there is a lot of overlap among mental health diagnoses broadly. this is partially because of the flaws in the diagnostic system, which requires us to make distinct divisions between phenomena where the division may be way more murky than that. so overlaps between a given set of diagnoses isn’t necessarily meaningful- it could just mean that those diagnoses incorporate very common and often shared symptoms (like anxiety, depression, isolation, etc). there’s also a lot of comorbidity across essentially all mental health disorders, and again, that’s not necessarily meaningful (meaning, it doesn’t mean that a given set of disorders are more connected than average, since they’re all really connected). 

so I get the connection between ASD (autism spectrum disorder, for those who may not know) and ADHD (attention-deficit hyperactivity disorder)- both neurodevelopmental, more often focused on kids (ADHD sometimes goes away during development, ASD does not), often includes hyper focus on a limited number of highly valued topics/activities, behavioral/structural accommodations are often helpful, etc. at the same time, ADHD is conceptualized to have a fairly specific neurobiological mechanism (dysfunctional reward processing, which primarily impacts the frontal lobe), while ASD has a more complex and widespread set of mechanisms that impacts movement, speech, sensory processes, and many other processes. ASD includes a much broader array of symptoms in comparison to ADHD.  So although they have some overlap, on the whole I don’t necessarily think they’re more related than average. 

I’m having a harder time understanding how BPD (borderline personality disorder) fits in. BPD is also developmental, but more environmentally based (adverse childhood experiences) vs. neurologically based (like ASD and ADHD). It also develops much later- ASD exists from birth or develops very early, and ADHD is typically present by age 7 or so, while BPD typically develops during adolescence and teenage years. BPD does often include executive functioning impairments, like ADHD (and to some extent ASD), but the most key impairments are different (BPD = emotion regulation, ADHD = reward processing, ASD = social cognition). At the same time, impulse control can be impaired in all three, and like you said, both emotion regulation and social cognition can be impaired across those disorders. Although- in ADHD we wouldn’t expect that social cognition is directly impaired- it’s more that people with ADHD often struggle to pay attention to all important social information and integrate that into behavior (basically, it’s a result of inattentiveness rather than a direct lack of ability/understanding). 

Rejection sensitivity/rejection sensitive dysphoria is a concept that’s been around for several decades at least, and mostly discussed in relationship to personality disorders including BPD but also histrionic personality disorder and dependent personality disorder, and some in relationship to depression. That said, it’s not exactly in the BPD criteria- although you can see how it is likely related to frantic efforts to avoid real or imagined abandonment, and feelings of emptiness. I can’t find any research that has studied ADHD or ASD in connection with rejection sensitivity, although there is some pop psych stuff on that out there. 

On the whole, I tend to think that ASD and ADHD are two of the better, more clear, and more empirically-founded diagnoses. Neither are perfect- especially because the diagnoses were formulated before we really understood the neurobiology/neuropsychology behind them- but in general they’re relatively strong. At the same time, there are diagnostic disparities in both (both are disproportionately diagnosed in boys/men) that need to be resolved- probably at least as much through better training and specific training in gender differences and other issues of cultural competency than through changes in the diagnostic criteria. BPD is a more flawed diagnosis, but does seem to capture something specific than is different from other mood, trauma, or personality disorders. 

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