uppercuts-and-undercuts - Tumblr blog

[uppercuts-and-undercuts]

cotton candy 💙🤍💗 cr. major scale 

[uppercuts-and-undercuts]

Ah, fine literature.

[uppercuts-and-undercuts]

HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO BREATH

 bonus:

[uppercuts-and-undercuts]

You ever feel like people misunderstand what you say on purpose, just because they don't want to admit you're right?

[uppercuts-and-undercuts]

my only advice to all the girls out there is to wear weird shit. just do it

[uppercuts-and-undercuts]

Just remember. There is no such thing as a fake geek girl. There are only fake geek boys. Science fiction was invented by a woman.

[uppercuts-and-undercuts]

Why don’t I keep sleeping for a little while longer and forget all this foolishness. – Franz Kafka

[uppercuts-and-undercuts]

This had me fucking screaming at 2 am

[uppercuts-and-undercuts]

yall ever just yearn? ever get filled with the most profound sense of longing for something you cant understand? yall ever crave? ever have an unexplainable ache?

[uppercuts-and-undercuts]

𝙼𝚊𝚛𝚌𝚑 𝟻, 𝟷𝟿𝟸𝟸 𝚃𝚑𝚎 𝙳𝚒𝚊𝚛𝚒𝚎𝚜 𝙾𝚏 𝙵𝚛𝚊𝚗𝚣 𝙺𝚊𝚏𝚔𝚊, 𝟷𝟿𝟷𝟺-𝟷𝟿𝟸𝟹

[uppercuts-and-undercuts]

WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK

[uppercuts-and-undercuts]

OH LOOK, THE FACTS PEOPLE LIKE TO IGNORE ARE THERE IN FUCKING PRINT.

Antis and the Russos: TONY IS SELFISH AND ARROGANT! THAT'S WHY HE TOLD EVERYONE HE WAS IRON MAN!

The real reason he told everyone directly from the Iron Man novelization:

RDJ got it. He understood Tony Stark inside and out. He was clearly the one only who did...

[uppercuts-and-undercuts]

i was thinking this morning about how i categorize fanfic authors that i enjoy like AKC breeds and decided to share my rubric with you:

the specialist: this author has a favorite kink or trope and has written 80% of the content in that tag. you know exactly what you’re getting. they have A Brand™️. no matter what other traits they display, dedicated rare pair authors belong here.

the chocolate box: essentially the exact opposite. this author will try anything once. they have 80+ works in the fandom with no discernible pattern. the shortest one is 268 words and the longest is well over 100k. this breed of author may or may not be related to:

the renaissance fan: they’ve written three things in your fandom: your favorite fic, your notp, and a bizarre crossover with a show you’ve never heard of. you hit “expand fandoms list” on their author page and have to scroll down twice to reach the bottom. whenever you curse the fact that you can’t legally commission fic writers, this is the author you’re thinking about.

the horn dog: they’re here for one thing and one thing only. if someone’s dick is not in another character’s mouth within 500 words, they apologize for it in the author’s notes. they have one (1) g-rated fic.

the rookie: this writer is usually young, new to fandom, or just got a beta-reader for the first time. their fics are a little all over the place, quality-wise, but you’re excited whenever their name pops up because their unique voice gets stronger every time. you feel a personal investment in their development, like you’re an old man reading the local high school sports page and saying “this kid’s the one to watch.”

the live streamer: the most prolific author in the fandom. their works are all over the front page when you sort by kudos. you have no idea how they generate this much work, and have seriously wondered if they have access to an extra-dimensional time portal. their stories are usually un-beta’d and the characterization varies wildly, but their best works are inspired and you’ve read them 30 times.

the cryptid: this one comes out of nowhere every two years, drops the best fanfic you’ve ever read, and disappears. fifteen months after you left a three paragraph comment about how they changed your life, you get a message in your inbox that just says “thanks.”

the novelist: we talk about “filing off the serial numbers” when someone reworks their most popular story to pitch it as an original novel; this author somehow does the reverse. their fics are excellent, usually long-reaching multi-chapter AUs that have almost nothing to do with the on-screen characters except their names. i’d like to extend my personal thanks to this breed of author because it’s the closest i get to reading an actual book.

the reunion tour: this author wrote some of the most popular works in the fandom, but either moved on to k-pop or burned out when canon took a turn for the worse. they put out one new thing a year, often an old draft that’s been haunting them from under the floorboards. their last six author’s notes all say they never thought they’d write this pairing again and “this will probably be the last time.”

who did i miss?

[uppercuts-and-undercuts]

Therapists aren’t people who you “pay to pretend to care about you”, therapists are people you pay to teach you how to care for yourself

[uppercuts-and-undercuts]

Sherlock Holmes (2009) dir. Guy Ritchie

[uppercuts-and-undercuts]

The Diaries Of Franz Kafka 1914-1923

[uppercuts-and-undercuts]

character in a fight scene: *restrains their opponent by pinning them against the wall by their wrists*

me: