whiskerwands

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*At a Ravenclaw party*

*Lily and Sirius talking in the corner*

Lily: “What are you drinking?”

Sirius: “The blood of my enemies”

*Remus from the middle of absolutely nowhere*

“It’s kool aid”

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Say it louder for the people in the back!

I’m just going to say this. I’ll say it until people finally listen to me. Peter was not a scared goody goody who wasn’t down to get in trouble or do things that affected his health. He was a marauder. He smoked. He liked fights. He liked doing dumb things that would cause him a broken bone. He was the first of the four to have his first kiss but he didn’t have a real relationship with anyone until his fifth or sixth year because before he just liked to have his little flings until he finally found someone who he truly liked. He talked back a lot to anyone who gave him a reason to.

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Sirius Black was 5,11 and the shortest marauder (aside from peter)

Every one claps politely.

There’s no back talk.

Because it is a fact.

remus towered over him

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Spending all my time reading silly little fics about a bunch of dead gay wizards.

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We love our two feminist icons 🥳

McGonagall: You are violating the dress code.

Sirius, dressed in girl's uniform to make a point: Why is that?

Sirius: I'm not wearing a tank top, you can't see my shoulders, my skirt is long enough and I have shorts underneath!

Sirius: iS iT BecAUSe mY KneECapS aRE diStrAcTinG tHe BoYS!!

McGonagall:

McGonagall: Your sweater says "fuck".

Sirius: oh

[whiskerwands]

…

james, age 16 : you shouldn't smoke remus, that shit's going to kill you

remus : then make sure i have a nice funeral will you

remus, age 21 : *lighting a cigarette, looking at james and lily potter's grave*

[whiskerwands]

A cozy afternoon

People liked to think that James Potter was perfect. Everyone except the Marauders of course. He understood though. Perhaps it was how he effortlessly scored goals in quidditch, or how even though his hair was messy it looked perfect, or perhaps how the room buzzed with excitement whenever he entered. James knew he wasn’t perfect. The Marauders knew he was flawed, and James was glad for it.

To James, nearly everything was perfect. The way the air smelled after a rainstorm. No matter how many worms there were. Chocolate mint ice cream. Lily and him. Or even now, how Sirius was mercilessly wrestling Peter to the ground next to the gryffindor fine fabric couch.

James grinned, his back pressing into the couch, his hand wrapped around Lily’s figure as he cheered the pair on. Lily hand loseley held a leather book she had borrowed from Remus. Though now she was intently focused on the fight. Remus stood at the kitchen counter behind the couch, pouring a blue drink into three cups. Marlene sat in a wooden chair that she pulled out from a small game table, laughing and yelling obscenities at the pair. James laughed as he and Lily raised their feet off the ground as Sirius and Peter tumbled beneath them.

He tilted his head to look at Lily beside him. He grinned when he was met with a smile. She turned away, her cheeks flushed as she shook with silent laughter at the pair's antics.

Peter learched backward away from Sirius, his back hitting the edge of the couch as he jutted his feet out, kicking haphazardly in Sirius’ direction.

An affronted look had carved into Sirius’ face as he crossed his arms. “That’s not fair. I literally can’t do anything.”

Peter grinned, his cheeks flushed, “Exactly.”

Remus scoffed lightly, a smile bright on his face. He walked over to them, three cups in hand.

“Thank you.” Lily smiled, taking the glass cup from Remus. He nodded gently and turned to walk towards Mary and Marlene.

“Remus, James tell him that he’s being stupid!” Sirius groaned.

James laughed, “Seems to me that he beat you fair and square.” He teased.

Sirius gasped comically, a look of pure betrayal on his face. Sirius turned to look at Remus.

“Remus!” Sirius groaned.

The prefect turned to look from Sirius to Peter’s still kicking form. He grinned as he shrugged lightly.

Sirius learched backwards. “I have been betrayed!”

Peter laughed, never stopping his kicking.

Sirius rolled his eyes, “Fine. I’ll let you win this time. Only because I pity the long streak of defeats you have.”

Marlene started a slow golf clap in Peter’s direction. Mary laughed, joining in, soon followed by James who nudged Lily to join.

Peter stood up, a crooked grin on his face as he bent down to supply a messy bow.

He plopped down on the empty space on the couch next to James, sighing contently.

Marlene narrowed her eyes, jokingly. “I hope you both know that I expect you to clean up the popcorn you knocked over.”

Peter grinned a sly grin, looking at the blonde, “I say that the loser should be forced to pick it up.”

“What?” Sirius exclaimed, appalled, “I wasn’t aware of any stakes in this fight! I demand a re-match!”

Peter sighed, his hand mockingly rubbing his chin, “I deny your proposition.”

Remus rolled his eyes as he bent down to quickly pick up the popcorn off the floor.

“Ah Remus my savior!” Sirius sung.

Peter looked to the side at Lily and James. “Did I do good?” He grinned.

James smiled, shrugging in a teasing manner. Lily nudged her elbow hard into James’ chest.

“Ow! I’m joking!” he rubbed his ribs.

“Well I think you did exceptionally well Peter.” Lily smiled kindly.

Peter grinned broadly, looking at Sirius. “Ha!”

James smiled, squeezing Lily’s shoulder, as the room burst out laughing again.

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A drunk wearwolf and three idiots

Sirius: “But if you get drunk then your time of the month won’t be so bad!”

Remus: “But then I’ll have the worst hangover, added with the whole werewolf thing.”

James: “Then we can brew you a hangover potion!”

Peter: “I think this is a great idea.”

This led to a very drunk werewolf tripping over nothing in the shrieking shack and barreling into a confused stag, effectively launching a tiny rat halfway across the room while a large black dog excitedly ran around in circles around the wolf. Needless to say, everyone was in pain the next day. Peter ended up telling Lily(She already knew about Remus’ furry little problem) what happened and she ended up having to sneak into the hospital wing to hand Remus a hangover potion because James and Sirius were too knocked out to do anything.

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The Marauders and Minnie's wife

Not edited sorry!

I will die on the hill that minerva mcgonagall had a cottage girl wife that she never told anyone about because no one ever asked her. They lived in a cottage in rural England. 

When Minnie went off to Hogwarts every year, the pair exchanged letters almost every other day, but Minnie being the genius she is, figured out a way to talk to her every so often, not just send letters. Every single letter was kept in a small box in Minnie’s classroom and whenever she was feeling homesick she would go through every single one.

 Minnie’s wife had never gone to Hogwarts because she was a squib but she completely supported Minnie’s passion for teaching.

            Even though Hogwarts can make whatever food Minnie wants she always longs for her wife’s baked goods. They also have 3 cats. And one dog. One ginger, one ragdoll, one black and white spotted one and they had the most joyous golden retriever. 

A hot summer before 6th year the Marauders being canonically extremely smart, decided to find and visit their favorite teacher for fun. When they found her house they were shocked to see that instead of their strict yet lovable teacher there was a short little woman with a pleated dress and flowers in her hair.

“Moony?” James started cautiously.

“Maybe we messed up the address-”

Remus spun around to Sirius, “I did not mess up.”

“Maybe-”

“Are you looking for someone?” Her voice was soft and cheerful.

The boys turn slowly to look at the woman. Sirius sauntered forward. “Yes actually you don’t happen to know a ‘Minnie’ do you?”

She cocked her head to the side, her brows drawn in thought.

“Minerva mcgonagall.” Remus corrected, sheepishly.

If you asked any of the marauders they would have told you that the woman’s eyes lit up at the mention of the name.

“Oh! Yes she lives here! How do you know her?”

“She’s our teacher. I’m James. Though she may have called me the best quidditch player Hogwarts has ever seen.” James grinned. “This is Sirius potter, the tall one is Remus Lupin and he’s Peter pettigrew.” Yes James introduced Sirius as a potter to everyone after his disownment.

The woman grinned, “Oh how wonderful, yes she’s told me a lot about you! Please come in!”

They then went on to talk until it was dark outside. 

Minnie was off doing order business so she came home late. She was taken aback to see her 4 favorite students and her wife all seated and laughing as they held a warm mug of butter bear in their hands. 

After that day the marauders made it a point to visit Minnie and her wife a bit more often, even writing her letters when they went to hogwarts. Regrettably, their visits became scarce when the four got involved in the war and eventually she would never see 2 of the 4 boys ever again. 

After THE halloween, Remus visited Minnie’s wife. The moment he stepped in he was swept into a warm hug. He could tell she was devastated. Her eyes were puffy and she looked tired.

“Where’s Minnie?” His voice lacked its usual warmness. 

She pitied the boy. When she looked at him she wanted to cry. He had lost everything. 

“She’s cleaning up some of the remains of the war.” She answered softly.

The pair talked for a bit until she asked him what his plan was.

“I don’t know, but you probably won't see me again for a while. That’s why I’m here. I wanted to say goodbye.”

After that interaction he didn’t see her for 12 years. When he came back it was because he was scared. He was afraid that now that Sirius was out of Azkaban he would look for both Minnie and her wife. He had warned them. While Minnie put up protective spells, her wife couldn’t help but feel that the story didn’t add up. 

Both she and Remus were right.

One night when Minnie had gone away to teach, she heard a knock on her door. 

She didn’t know how to feel when she opened the door to find Sirius Black Potter’s gaunt face smiling at her.

“If you ask me to leave I will.” He had simply said.

Her brows furrowed, “No come in please.”

He explained everything while she tended to his wounds and fed him until he was ready to leave.

Her heart once again broke a few years later when she was told by her wife that Sirius had died in an Order fight. Soon after, she was mad. She was mad that Liberation only came with his death. He deserved so much more. He deserved to be free when he was alive.

A few years later she had received yet another knock on her door. She opened it not expecting to see three 16 year olds staring at her. One had flaming red hair and freckles littered across his face. One had bushy brown hair and tanned skin. But it was the final one that made her breath catch. A boy with tanned skin and unruly hair stared at her. She felt her eyes well up as she remembered a boy who she once knew who looked exactly like him. All the same except the eyes.

“You look just like your father Harry.”

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Minnie and Sirius being besties

Sirius: *Trying to distract Minnie while James sets up a prank*

Minerva: “No Mr Black I will not go to hogsmeade with you.”

Sirius: “You do know that no one can resist my charm right Minnie?” *flexes*

Minerva: *Stares blankly*

Sirius: *grins that sirius black grin*

Minerva: "Where’s the rest of you?"

Sirius: *Grins widder*

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This 100% happened.

Lily, answering the phone: Hello

James: It's James.

Lily, sighing: What did he do this time?

James: No, it's me, it's James.

Lily, sighing: What did you do this time?

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Masterlist

Marauders

The Marauders and Minnie's wife

A drunk werewolf and three idiots

A cozy afternoon

Jily:

-James quoting shakespeare to Lily <3

Sirius Black:

-Distracting Minnie while James sets up a prank

Remus Lupin:

James Potter:

Marlene McKinnon:

Harry Potter

Tom Riddle:

Marvel

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James quoting shakespear to Lily <3

James standing on a common room table half drunk during a gryffindor party: “My Lilypad!

*Lily in a corner talking to Mary, her face scarlet, matching her hair.* 

James: “Where art thou my Lilyflower?”

*Lily facepalms while Mary snickers.*

James: “But soft!” *Stumbles on the table. His glass of firewhisky tipping slightly.* “What light through yonder window breaks?”

*Crowd cheering*

*Marauders laughing while urging James to continue*

Lily: *Peeking through her fingers.*

James: “It is the East, and Lilyflower is the sun!”

Mary laughing: “Did James Potter, pureblood gryffindor just quote muggle literature for you?”

Lily: *Groans.* "Toerag."

Unknown to Mary a small smile was unfurling onto Lily’s lips. However much Lily would later deny, the butterflies she felt in her stomach when James looked at her that night were like fireworks <3