dearestdem1

[dearestdem1]

sitting here in chemistry class staring at the front camera just thinking. why am I ugly? if I looked like my mother, would I find it easier to accept how I look? would it be easier looking in a mirror if my mother had been accepting and not judgemental growing up? would I be more successful if I was more conventionally attractive? If I had a button nose? Bigger eyes? Rosier lips? If my face wasn't round? If I had a stronger jaw? would it be easier to look at myself if I looked the complete opposite of what I look like now?

[dearestdem1]

I think that the most important part about Colm Fahey's character is the one that people ignore, and that is that Colm completely fucked Jesper up. He is a loving father, he wants nothing but the very best for his son, he has faced awful loss and is incredibly patient, even when he doesn't have to be. And he still ruined Jesper. His own fears and grief was projected onto his son. The love he held for Jesper is what ruined him. People forget that yes, Aditi's loss was horrific for Jesper, it destroyed him and set him on a destructive path, but Colm is the one that kept him walking on that path, instead of turning him around. Jesper doesn't hate being Zowa because of his mother's death, he hates it because of Colm's influence. He didn't feel safe to come home when his gambling got bad. Jesper and his father are very, very much the Ted Lasso conversation of; "Thank you, and fuck you."

We love Colm. Jesper loves Colm. I love Colm, so so much. He still ruined his son.

[dearestdem1]

I do not know you very well or at all but I love you <3

oh god I have the urge to write fanfiction for fandoms that are long dead

[dearestdem1]

Thank so so much for tagging me!!

my taste is very mainstream so don't judge me 💔

1. Lavender Sunflower- Tory Lanez

2. Good Looking - Suki Waterhouse

3. 505- Arctic Monkeys

4. Blue- Billie Eilish

5. Love Me Not- Ravyn Lenae

6. Sports Car- Tate Mcrae

7. Nurse's Office- Melanie Martinez

8. Derniere Danse- Indila

9. Ma Meillure Ennemie

10. Busy Woman- Sabrina Carpenter

There are so many more songs I love, but these are the ones that have been stuck in my head the past week.

no pressure tags- @the-angry-acrobat @fallout-frog love you guys!!!

got tagged by @seeking-elsewhither to put my on repeat playlist on shuffle and give the first 10 songs YAY!

re-enchanted world john mark mcmillan

tear in my heart twenty one pilots

terminals relient k

sahara relient k

unhaunted john mark mcmillan

cuckoo! neon horse

burn out bright switchfoot

عنوان إقامتي ayman kafrouny

which to bury; us or the hatchet? relient k

all i have sarah sparks

tagging... @in-echoes-forever @thatfriendlyanon @ghosts-and-blue-sweaters @sunflower-chai :3

[dearestdem1]

every time something goes wrong in my life, I stop and think: what would Kaz do?

I just lost all my friends in one day, so I think, how would Kaz feel? Would he allow himself to think about it or would he just not care?

I feel like my life is pointless, so I think, would Kaz even stop to care or would he throw himself into building new empires and burning them down?

I'm in love, so I think, if Inej didn't exist, would Kaz ever consider the possibility of falling in love? Or would he forever just be Dirtyhands, Bastard of the Barrel?

Kaz's existence doesn't eclipse mine, and neither will he ever be anything apart from ink on paper realistically, but it's always fun to think about what my favourite Ketterdam criminal would be up to.

[dearestdem1]

you're so sweet:((

oh my god. im a loser.

[dearestdem1]

oh god I have the urge to write fanfiction for fandoms that are long dead

[dearestdem1]

I laughed way too hard at ts

jesper: when i go to jail, i'm changing my name to 'mitochondria' because-

inej: mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell. yes, we get it

nina: that's genius!

wylan: is no one else going to bring up the fact that he said 'when', and not 'if'?

[dearestdem1]

i love pathetic n submissive men <3

[dearestdem1]

oh my god. im a loser.

[dearestdem1]

HEY GIRL!!!

So like, just wanted you to know that ur profile looks AMAZING!! I think it looks so cool especially ur pfp n stuff idk just wanted to give compliments n shit hope you didnt get annoyed 😭😭

AWWWWW thank you so much thats so sweet!!!!

of course you didn't annoy me, thank you so much :D

[dearestdem1]

why do I have to lose one to have another?

[dearestdem1]

it's the time of day when I post emo stuff on tumblr

[dearestdem1]

my heart still drops when I see your name btw.

i miss you so much but I fucking hate myself for it.

it's hard missing the one thing who hurt you so much you can't breathe.

and its hard hating yourself for it.

[dearestdem1]

friendship breakups are so weird, like what do you mean we were best friends for a whole year and now you act like I don't exist? Wdym I poured my entire heart out to you and you're so much happier without me? What do you mean we have matching rings and bracelets and now you post stories hanging out without me? wdym you're happy when I cry? wdym you hate me when I used to love you with all my heart just a few months ago? Wdym I have no friends now and you guys are having the time of your lives? wdym I still miss you and hate myself for it and you guys are happier than ever?

weird.

[dearestdem1]

why am I lowkey a pushover......

[dearestdem1]

I feel like people should learn to accept that one person's canon is not the same for every other person.

For example, you could ship Nina and Hanne while your friend ships Nina and Matthias. You can be a fan of one while accepting or missing the other. That's just how it should be. There's no need to be rigid about one ship or another- Everyone has a right to like what they want.