MINORS DNI // she/her // 30 // neurospicy // plural // sapphic // demiromantic // DMs open to mutuals 😊
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Contrary to popular belief the biggest beginner's roadblock to art isn't even technical skill it's frustration tolerance, especially in the age of social media. It hurts and the frustration is endless but you must build the frustration tolerance equivalent to a roach's capacity to survive a nuclear explosion. That's how you build on the technical skill. Throw that "won't even start because I'm afraid it won't be perfect" shit out the window. Just do it. Just start. Good luck.
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In this world it is so rare, to witness another human being who cares about you, actually treat you like who you really are instead of just someone else you seem like to them. When you find it, cherish it.
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If you could like forcefem one fictional character from any media. Who would you forcefem?
(Or you can forcemasc, if that is more your preference)
#I like your answer#I'm gonna forcefem Avatar Kuruk#because from those flashbacks about him in the Kyoshi novels#it really felt like he needed to know about other options for how to gender#and then maybe he'd have been much happier before his life turned so tragic
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Hi speaking of medical literacy for trans people, transfems pls check out the website Transfeminine Science, especially their introductory article on feminizing HRT
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Doesn't matter how comfortable you get. Doesn't matter how scared you get. Doesn't matter how many years you expect things to stay the same. Life never stops being sudden, wild, and exciting.
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current vibe
This blog is a mature space. If you're a minor, I promise you won't get anything out of staying here.
I'm a trans woman, she/her. Sapphic, lesbian, gay as fuck, demiromantic, cuddly, extremely neurodivergent, and a fused plural system. On some level, I identify as alien, princess, fey, puppy, and wolf.
I've spent most of my life surviving through a series of unfortunate events--you'd never believe how many and how rough--but I've since found a real family who have helped me begin to recover. I'm somewhat disabled by various physical and mental consequences of what I've been through. Still, I fight to find myself. I hope to become someone who I can consider a real artist, and to study and research psychology. Stuck in IT for now, but I have my hobbies.
Currently taken romantically. I've thought of myself as poly for a long time, but now... I've found someone really special
#about myself#announcement#status update#trauma#complex ptsd#plurality#disassociative identity disorder#transgender#trans woman#transfeminine#trans femme#trans feminine#trans fem#transfem#lesbian#sapphic#puppygirl#wolf girl#puppy gf#disabled#demiromantic#found family#artist#fey#fae#neurodivergent
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It hurts to have instincts that tell me that a person or space that I am enticed by, isn't safe.
It hurts to somewhat dismiss those instincts and ignore my gut because I want to give folks as many chances as possible.
It hurts to have to constantly feel and process my very worst instincts telling me that this will end poorly every single time, in accordance with my worst instincts also telling me that everything is more dangerous the less people I have.
It hurts to think I've just made a mistake and hurt someone as I barely notice that they are taking everything I do and say in bad faith and looking for any excuse, however flimsy, to make me feel bad, abandon me, and turn everyone else against me.
It hurts when people I trusted and call friends take the bait and throw me out, in favor of a manipulator.
It hurts when a handful of those same ex-friends come to me long after everything was said and done, and tell me that I was right and that their decision to not trust me resulted in the destruction of the space we'd cultivated. Too late to undo any of the damage.
It hurts to know that no matter how much wisdom, experience, knowledge, and expertise I gather, most people treat me like the village idiot just because I don't have an interest in exerting power forcefully on others.
It hurts when my worst instincts telling me that this will end poorly every single time get proven more and more right as this cycle happens over and over again with no end in sight.
It hurts when my worst instincts telling me that everything is more dangerous the less people I have, persist in the aftermath.
It hurts when I realize that I will not get to experience my full self and reclaim my childhood until I've built a healthier community from scratch through hard work, after fending for myself up till that point.
It hurts to know that I still don't fully understand how to commit once and for all to being a bitch--a decision that I *know* would help me to only spend my time with better people--as I don't know how to keep myself safe if I act like that.
It feels better when I remember that I finally have someone, anyone, who broke this losing streak and stuck by me.
#rant post#vent post#community#community building#transmisogyny#trans experience#transfem experience#witch hunts#trauma#social horror#social trauma#isolation#abuse victim#abuse#exile#feminism#trans feminism#intersectional feminism#womanhood#trans womanhood#feminine experience
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It deeply worries me how far every community and large group that I've found so far has descended into toleration of bullying and/or lack of accountability. Not only doing nothing about it, but resisting anyone who disagrees with that status quo, because their feelings stress them out too much. Their fucking feelings. Aren't our feelings supposed to matter?
It's not community or friendship if my feelings about unresolved bullying and lack of accountability are so stressful that you've decided your own conscience is my fault and my unwanted, abusive pressure. Y'all have no fucking clue anymore what friendship and community are. This world is sick and completely lost.
#personal rant#vent post#I'm not adding tags because this post isn't exactly constructive enough for me to want it found a bunch
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Video

literally my exact thoughts lmaooooo
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“Imagine you were a girl, forced to live in a male body? And if you tried to change your body, a lot of powerful people would get really mad about it, and actively try to stop you? Wouldn’t that be fucked up? Wouldn’t that suck? Hi I’m Rod Sterling. Tonight we’ll experience the existential horror of:
- The Trans Woman”

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I'm getting really sick of being manipulated, used, and thrown away. Girls, please do not ever date above your economic class unless it's somebody who goes out of their way to build equity (i.e. pay you) without you even asking them too. And if they suddenly just decide that they've spent on you too much and need to complain at you about it and cut back, even though you never even asked them to do any of that in the first place, do not continue the romantic relationship. Honestly they're probably not even gonna be a decent friend at that point.
Whether your differences are economic, racial, sexual, etc., a healthy relationship is one in which all parties study their inherent power dynamics and voluntarily stay dedicated to equity.
#vent post#rant post#feminism#trans feminism#intersectional feminism#dating#relationships#relationship equity#power dynamics
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I'm gonna second butterscotch. I can also really enjoy various fruit flavorings, but the quality and taste of them cam vary wildly.
Girl cock?
More like girl talk.
Please talk with me I’m lonely.
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*sanity check for the queer and neurodivergent communities*
Expressing your feelings is not pressure. Opening up to someone close to you about how you feel about being told no is not manipulation.
Friendship and especially romance do entitle you to being heard. If someone doubles down on the notion that they can shamelessly switch off their duty to listen to you at their own whim, even if you're having a mental health crisis and they're your partner, then they're not actually your friend. They're just using you to get friendship out of you. Don't you always listen to them? Aren't you always doing your best to be there for them when they need help? If they don't do the same, they're abusive. And being abusive often comes with them getting on top of the issue and making sure that you think you're abusive before you have a chance to process things.
I thought we wanted to help transfems feel less like taking up space is wrong, didn't we? Don't we want to help me and my sisters to feel like we're actually allowed to speak? To express ourselves?
So then stop turning around and telling us that we're manipulative simply because we have feelings. It just shows me that you're comfortable with manipulating us to stay closed up inside our shells, constantly terrified of offending absolutely any other creature in our presence. I know that some of you actually want that--you want us docile, kept in line, working hard to be your fucktoy, objectified. I know for some that is a valid kink, but most of us are trying to have equal and equitable relationships, and to treat someone this way without communicating it and receiving enthusiastic consent, is abusive.
And stop pretending we deserve to be written off as evil and thrown away the instant we make a single mistake. Nobody has a perfect record in the journey of learning to be better.
I see this way too often--treating us like abusers for simply having feelings, kicking us out of spaces even if we've already learned from that one experience how to be more perfect--even inside the trans community, and it makes me sick. This is why transfems often can't find any fully reliable allies besides our own kind. Most people are fully comfortable not only allowing our constant mistreatment to continue, but delighting in it themselves.
After how much I've been through, I deserve to be pampered for life simply for continuing to not turn hateful and violent. I should be worshipped for my sage wisdom. And unlike many of y'all, no matter how much I deserve something, I refuse to receive it without enthusiastic consent. Do me a favor and really think about that.
#abuse culture#manipulation#transgender pride#transfem pride#transgender#transfem#trans woman#trans womanhood#transmisogyny#rant post
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