meownikaa

[meownikaa]

Motylki aktywne na grudzień, styczeń 2024/25 reblog!

chce wiedzenie kogo obserwować..

[meownikaa]

why nothing sad happens in my life so I can cvt myself for it ;-;

[meownikaa]

literally hes so me?? I've been trying to find someone just like my abuser too, but I can't find anyone like him anywhere. Maybe I shouldn't let him go? Maybe he did what was right, and I was dumb to think that it would be better if I tried to leave him. Like when someone acts slightly like him, then I'm starting to get attached, but when i realise that they will never be him, I just leave. I just wish he would come back cus I can't find any way to deal with my trauma, and I just want to make it worse. And nobody understands me cus they think that it's so easy to let someone who ruined you go. But it's not, and the worst part is that I don't want to let him go. I just want to find someone who I could abuse like he did to me. I want to watch someone cry because of me like I cried because of him. (ren is so me omg)

[meownikaa]

guess who got sa'ed again bc of their stupidity

[meownikaa]

I cant process it. I can't process that my rapists and trafickers and sexual abusers are suppossd to be behind bars, they are supposed to be locked up. I cant process that, because it was like they had the riggt to do it to me, that they did nothing wrong, that they were using my body because they were allowed to, that i didn't own myself. That i was an object they used because they had the right to use it. I will never process that they are supposed to have consequences. They aren't supposed to live freely and enjoy their life, they are supposed to be in prison for what they have done, done to me! But no, i cant process that, because how can hard against be have consequences? Im worthless, i have no worth, whatever people do to me can not have consequences, because i deserved it, because they had the right to. It cant have consequences because it was done against ME, and we all know i have no worth, no value.

[meownikaa]

99% people I know csnt fucking understand that ;-;

[meownikaa]

like she's mad at me, but I dont understand why? Like I told her about my trauma, and she acts like it happened to her, and it's giving her panic attacks cus she's overthinking about it. But it happened to ME, so I should be the one who is idk sad about it? But I moved on, and I don't really care about it that much anymore, but she do and it's making me crazy cus it happened to ME not her wtf do she doesn't have problems of her own? Like I get that she can get worried about me, but to stop texting to me because I moved on, and I can live with this? Absolutely lame

[meownikaa]

im not saying therapy isnt working im just saying putting my hands around her throat n strangling her to death would speed my recovery up a lot fucking faster

[meownikaa]

Having no empathy really just makes me feel like I can’t ever connect with anyone truly

[meownikaa]

My APSD traits she showing up a lot lately

[meownikaa]

jebac falszywe suki

[meownikaa]

geografie mam w sercu

[meownikaa]

hey fun fact did you know that if you're on the schizophrenia spectrum, have psychosis, have psychotic symptoms or traits, etc, that you're loved and your symptoms and traits should not be vilainized or seen as evil or ugly?

[meownikaa]

[meownikaa]

[meownikaa]

wow what a pretty boy...he would look beautiful writhing in pain and crying in agony

[meownikaa]

Haha yeah guys we’re so bungou-back haha….