offbranddragon

[offbranddragon]

Fortunately i have three cats who all rapidly alert to my heart fucking up at all so once the mean one was up my ass i was like "ah, this isn't just a one off i need to do things" and am now getting some of the most hostile cuddles of my life (shes bit me twice)

I neeeeeed to stop having freak health events right as i try to go to sleep

[offbranddragon]

I neeeeeed to stop having freak health events right as i try to go to sleep

[offbranddragon]

Wistful Whispful Rwuckus

(honestly wasnt sure how to write ruckus in uwu speak to make it fit :insert awkward peace sign here:) Pairing: Elf Rook Ingellvar (based on my oc Myris : 3) / Taash

Word count: 1,765 words

Content warnings: None Prompt: Day 5 for the @dragonagekissweek aka Battlefield. Rook has a hell of a time fighting a dragon but gets rewarded plenty!

FT: Honorary Bellara as i did the fight this is based on with her!

This is maybe more silly goofy than intended but we ball, I needed a writing break so I did this <3 Read more to make it prettier on the feed

They were JUST going to fight a dragon, they'd fought dragons before, but this was waaaaay out of control. There was Antaam, fire, weird lizard things trying to bite them; it sucked! It didn't help that the dragon was also being rude and wouldn't stay in line of sight let alone in range for Taash to do much damage to it. So, dealing with the dragon had fallen to both Rook and Bellara while Taash dealt the the Antaam which felt a little unfair.

It didn't take long for the Antaam to be worn down to the point they stopped coming and yet the two elves had done little work on the dragon that soared over head. They weren't missing their shots, they just weren't doing much. Any big spell or neat combo move was out of the question due to distance. This thing also seemed to just be messing with them by swinging just low enough for a nice shot only to throw a fire ball at them.

"Do you think you could, maybe, ask her nicely to leave?" Bellara asked as she tracked the giant mean lizard with her bow. That would be nice, more than nice, but Rook heavily doubted Taash's roaring and growls would do much more than piss it off further. If anyone could talk a dragon out of setting them on fire it wouldn't ever be Taash though, it'd be Bellara but Bellara was not made to negotiate with dragons. She could hardly even negotiate with Assan.

Taash tracked the dragon visually as it did a large circle around them, "We're in her den, her nest, she isn't leaving and wont let us leave either." The dragon hunter called almost casually. It was fascinating really. The three of them were all experts in their own fields in some way and you could always tell that by how they spoke about it. Mid battle with the mechanical ghosts that haunted Arlathan Bellara would be chatting away about what their supposed purpose was as well as her experience with them all while carefully dodging their attacks. Rook was both talking to the dead they fought like petulant children while also joking about their wayward youth in the necropolis. Then there was Taash who sounded both like a talking book as well as a very very passionate hunter, which they were. Rook was enamored with their group to put it lightly but hanging onto words served them ill in battle. Yet something about battle made listening all the more thrilling.

The dragon swooped low enough for both Bellara and Rook to unload shots into it. Necrotic damage was Rook's specialty and helped wear down the beast but, well, it felt like tiny drops in a bucket. This was going to take for ever unless it landed near them. Grounding it manually had already been taken off the table since it was near impossible for the watcher and jumper to do enough damage fast enough without any aid from Taash. Right now Taash's aid was mainly watching it and calling out when it was moving to land as well as circling the archers to protect them. Rook would be lying if they said it wasn't a bit distracting having the dragon hunter circling them, growling lowly under their breath, but there was nothing they could do about it. Fire was raining on them which was a lot more important than any amount of draw they felt to the hunter.

"She's coming down! Back up!" Taash called and they scattered. Bellara slid out of the way before popping up like a little grasshopper, Rook rolled back before scrambling to get out of the way as the damn thing was a little closer than they thought it'd be. The only person remotely prepared for this was Taash who was both out of the way and then engaging with the dragon in a blink. Back and forth the three went with the beast before eventually a well aimed arrow brought it to rest for good. All three were exhausted and a little burnt but it was done, dragon was slayed, they could go home now and tell everyone about the trap the Antaam had set as well as nurse their wounds.

"I can't help but feel a little bad for her, " Bellara lamented as she helped heal their wounds for travel. She was always compassionate to what ever creatures she found and it was sweet even if said creature wanted to kill them.

"Hey, at least the Antaam couldn't blight her. " Taash said trying to be supportive. Even if they'd left her then the Antaam would have made something of her or terrorized her enough she kept chasing people out for them to take. It wasn't a full mercy because it was her and them still , but it at least made it feel better in some odd way. It still sucked but a lot of stuff sucked right now.

"Even if she tried to roast us she was still pretty cool," Rook commented, a bit unsure as to what to say. They were a watcher, watchers weren't exactly made to kill dragons let alone see them. It was luck they were well trained with a bow but their training wasn't ever meant to go against something like that. Picking off the angry skeleton or vengeful spirit from a safe distance had been the purpose of their arrows, their hand well trained and steady to hit those delicate weak points. Now they'd found a new purpose but Rook still felt like they were just winging it. Taash and Bellara were way more skilled at fighting living things that were made of flesh and meat. They also did so with respect when it was called for while Rook just felt...weird. In the Necropolis you reburied what ever woke up if you could or got someone to deal with laying the spirit to rest and then just...moved on. It wasn't really significant, it just happened, and while the dead were honored they were still often dealt with like unruly kids or chaotic animals messing stuff up. It was something light and funny usually and sometimes sad but nothing too lingering. Rook still knew and felt a need to give rites to what ever they fought of course, but they just weren't good at it. Emmrich was much better, much more dedicated to being a watcher, Rook was just a helper and felt a lot better doing basically anything else but last rites.

A harsh slap at their back that nearly sent them into the mud pulled them out of their own head. Taash always nearly took the tiny elf off their feet as if unaware of their own strength. Rook knew the opposite was true which just made it seem like some weird tease or assertion of dominance, but it did help ground them sometimes even if Taash didn't know that. Bellara had wandered off to check out some of the abandoned treasure, leaving the dragon hunter and the watcher to stand and wait for her. It was fine, Rook didn't really mind given nothing was trying to kill them and the weather was nice enough.

"You did good," Taash awkwardly praised as they crossed their arms.

"Thanks?" Rook was unsure if this was a genuine compliment or just a simple nice gesture. The whole fight they were running around like a chicken with its head cut off, just barely avoiding fire ball after fire ball. They knew they looked stupid. They always looked stupid. It was fine, Taash didn't have to be nice to cheer them up about it.

Taash cleared their throat, a light blush on their face, "Pretty killer shot at the end."

Rook blinked, "Are you...."

"No! That was a sick fight! You were hot!" Taash rambled out sounding offended. Rook had heard some Qunari were really 'into' fighting dragons and stuff, they wouldnt fault Taash for being amped up from the adrenaline if that was the case but it apparently wasn't. Taash was into them?? And their stupid running around?? What at all about Rook during that fight did it for them right now?? They were pretty sure they'd tripped at least twice over their own feet and had nearly dropped their bow a few times. Nothing about that said 'hot and sexy'.

"I mean, i did get set on fire a few times." Rook joked, the joke practically making itself. Taash loudly groaned which only fueled more laughter. A fit of rabid giggles was interrupted by the harsh shoving of lips onto another. Taash grabbed the odd collar of rooks armor, lifting them to their toes as they forcefully crashed their mouths together. It was sooty and they both smelled of smoke and sweat, Taash a bit more than Rook did, but it was exhilarating even if Rook was still laughing a bit. Fiery kisses were still something they were getting used to as well as spontaneous ones, but Rook liked it. Taash's lips were full and soft with a little bit of roughness at the edges where they chewed them sometimes, they were divine if plagued by a hunger Rook was often unprepared for.

"You suck," Taash said as they pulled apart, still holding Rook on their toes. The elf maybe weighed as much a nug, maybe less, so they were happily dangling, a cheeky smile on their face.

"And you still kissed me!" Rook said, sticking their tongue out. Taash just rolled their eyes before dropping them back onto their feet, Rook teetering slightly as the stabilized themselves. They'd touch on that when they got back to the lighthouse, Antaam could be lurking waiting or something else might have noticed the dragon had been defeated. Now was not the time to tease someone who could throw them where they pleased and do as they wished with practically zero effort.

A little flutter of a kiss was placed to their cheek, a cheery voice following it, "And now I kissed you too! Post fight kisses are good even if we are a little gross." Bellara quickly stood on her toes and gave Taash a similar kiss, the Qunari leaning down so she could reach them better. Rook couldn't disagree with her, they were a good morale boost even if they didn't really get time for it often. What was going on between Rook and Taash was a lot different than morale boosting cheek kisses but Bellara didn't need to know that. That woman had enough fuel for her current novel as is.

[offbranddragon]

chinese qipao by 芷嫣定制，春蕾旗袍定制

[offbranddragon]

Mean mugging people with papa!

Looking at people with disgust with papa!

Some Myris lore below!

Myris canonly views Emmrich as the dad they never had. They less look up to him and more view him as a solid voice of judgement that has no real reason to baby them like Myrna and Vorgoth do. Emmrich is one of the few people Myris genuinely feels connected to as well as comfortable around and they deeply value the bond they have with him.

They push for Emmrich and Taash to learn about each other mostly because both of them are Myris' favorite people and they want them to get along and are scared they'll lose one of them :c

Myris frequently likes to curl up in Emmrichs room while he's writing letters and sleeps in random corners on the floor. Emmrich is the only reason Myris doesn't entirely abandon the watchers once the game ends and still makes frequent visits to the necropolis.

[offbranddragon]

Some Emmrich spam for today! If you wanna use feel free without any credits but a like would be appreciated!

Bonus because IK people want pictures of her and this was the only good one:

[offbranddragon]

Taking various companions to the blackthorn manner today, will edit with anything of note!

Note 1: The braziers have text on them that i never noticed that says " JKLLD SDAF APOWE" aka complete fucking gibberish

Note 2: the skeletons in the entry way have their mouths open. Also the curtains by them aren't actually connected to anything they are just clipped slightly into the wall and have a gap between them and the wall they are visually supposed to be hanging from. Purple curtains are properly set up and look actually attached though are just clipping into the stone work too just better

Note 3: Not sure what the candelabra is supposed to be but its some masked person holding two daggers. Others are a woman holding part of it up and appears to be a mermaid (Images below) Note 4: The candles are scented (?) like Myrrn which is apparently an embalming resin. (i think i spelled that correctly). This was discovered in a conversation between Neve and Emmrich. Note 5: theres a journal that has writing on it but im on console so i cant fucking read it Note 6: the glowing of the trapped spirit skeleton is, for some reason, centered on its crotch. The words around it seem to also be gibberish just like the braziers though each set of words appears to be different.

Note 7: for some reason one of the skeletons floor writing is on top of a corpse

Note 8: theres a card set on a table that looks like the loading screen card art from DA:I (Images below)

Knife dude Candelabra

Mermaid Candelabra

Cards on table

[offbranddragon]

either i mistranslated a grave or it says "From Heath We Rise"

i think its missing a letter unless im stupid

[offbranddragon]

Flora and Fauna 🌿

[offbranddragon]

MUNDAY  ASKS !

🌈 — name(s) & pronouns 🎈 — gender and/or sexuality 🎂 — age and/or birthday 🕗 — time zone 💕 — single or taken? ⭐️ — sun, moon, & rising signs, if known 💭 — MBTI and/or enneagram, if known ❓ — three adjectives that describe you ❤️ — what are some of your best qualities? 💔 — what are some of your worst qualities? ✨ — what would you change about yourself, if anything? 💘 — what and/or who do you consider near and dear to you? 🚗 — what vehicle(s) do you drive? ✈️ — ever traveled anywhere interesting? ⌨️ — what operating system(s) do you use? 📱 — mobile or desktop version of tumblr? 🖥 — favorite platform besides tumblr? 🎮 — favorite video game(s)? 🖱 — any cool devices/tool(s) of the trade? (i.e. type of mouse, monitor, keyboard, tablet, etc) 💍 — any piercings? 💎 — want any (more) piercings? 🖊 — any tattoos? 🔏 — want any (more) tattoos? 🎄 — favorite holiday(s)? 🍝 — favorite food(s)? 🍦 — favorite ice cream flavor(s)? 🍰 — favorite sweet(s)/dessert(s)? 🐶 — any pets? 😍 — celebrity crush(es)? 😊 — any career desires? 📚 — if you’re in college, what’s your level (undergrad, grad, phd, etc) and/or degree program? 😖 — what annoys you? 🎶 — favorite song at the moment? 📕 — favorite book/series? 🧶 — any non-writing hobbies/interests? 📺 — favorite movie(s) and/or tv show(s)? 📇 — does your url have a meaning? if so, what is it? ✏️ — how long have you been roleplaying on tumblr? ✍️ — what other platforms have you roleplayed on? 🗒 — what is/are your favorite genre(s)/theme(s) to write? 🤔 — what genre(s)/theme(s) do you struggle to write the most? 😁 — what’s your favorite part about being part of the rpc? 😤 — what do you dislike the most about being part of the rpc? 💻 — how many friends have you made in the rpc? feel free to tag a few of them! 🎧 — do you write while listening to music/podcasts/videos/etc, or do you need total silence? 🤗 — are there any rpc mutuals that you’d like to meet irl? 😀 — are there any rpc mutuals that you’ve met irl before? 💖 — what was one of the greatest/happiest moments you’ve had in the rpc? 🖤 — what was one of the worst/most depressing moments you’ve had in the rpc? 😳 — what was your most embarrassing moment in the rpc? 🎁 — what have you accomplished in the rpc that you’re proud of? 🫂 — how many friends are in your irl friend group(s)? 🎉 — what are some of your favorite things to do with your irl friends? 😗 — what are some of your favorite things to do when you have some time to yourself? 💯 — share three random facts about yourself that your mutuals may not know about you.

[offbranddragon]

Wistful Whispful Rwuckus

(honestly wasnt sure how to write ruckus in uwu speak to make it fit :insert awkward peace sign here:) Pairing: Elf Rook Ingellvar (based on my oc Myris : 3) / Taash

Word count: 1,765 words

Content warnings: None Prompt: Day 5 for the @dragonagekissweek aka Battlefield. Rook has a hell of a time fighting a dragon but gets rewarded plenty!

FT: Honorary Bellara as i did the fight this is based on with her!

This is maybe more silly goofy than intended but we ball, I needed a writing break so I did this <3 Read more to make it prettier on the feed

They were JUST going to fight a dragon, they'd fought dragons before, but this was waaaaay out of control. There was Antaam, fire, weird lizard things trying to bite them; it sucked! It didn't help that the dragon was also being rude and wouldn't stay in line of sight let alone in range for Taash to do much damage to it. So, dealing with the dragon had fallen to both Rook and Bellara while Taash dealt the the Antaam which felt a little unfair.

It didn't take long for the Antaam to be worn down to the point they stopped coming and yet the two elves had done little work on the dragon that soared over head. They weren't missing their shots, they just weren't doing much. Any big spell or neat combo move was out of the question due to distance. This thing also seemed to just be messing with them by swinging just low enough for a nice shot only to throw a fire ball at them.

"Do you think you could, maybe, ask her nicely to leave?" Bellara asked as she tracked the giant mean lizard with her bow. That would be nice, more than nice, but Rook heavily doubted Taash's roaring and growls would do much more than piss it off further. If anyone could talk a dragon out of setting them on fire it wouldn't ever be Taash though, it'd be Bellara but Bellara was not made to negotiate with dragons. She could hardly even negotiate with Assan.

Taash tracked the dragon visually as it did a large circle around them, "We're in her den, her nest, she isn't leaving and wont let us leave either." The dragon hunter called almost casually. It was fascinating really. The three of them were all experts in their own fields in some way and you could always tell that by how they spoke about it. Mid battle with the mechanical ghosts that haunted Arlathan Bellara would be chatting away about what their supposed purpose was as well as her experience with them all while carefully dodging their attacks. Rook was both talking to the dead they fought like petulant children while also joking about their wayward youth in the necropolis. Then there was Taash who sounded both like a talking book as well as a very very passionate hunter, which they were. Rook was enamored with their group to put it lightly but hanging onto words served them ill in battle. Yet something about battle made listening all the more thrilling.

The dragon swooped low enough for both Bellara and Rook to unload shots into it. Necrotic damage was Rook's specialty and helped wear down the beast but, well, it felt like tiny drops in a bucket. This was going to take for ever unless it landed near them. Grounding it manually had already been taken off the table since it was near impossible for the watcher and jumper to do enough damage fast enough without any aid from Taash. Right now Taash's aid was mainly watching it and calling out when it was moving to land as well as circling the archers to protect them. Rook would be lying if they said it wasn't a bit distracting having the dragon hunter circling them, growling lowly under their breath, but there was nothing they could do about it. Fire was raining on them which was a lot more important than any amount of draw they felt to the hunter.

"She's coming down! Back up!" Taash called and they scattered. Bellara slid out of the way before popping up like a little grasshopper, Rook rolled back before scrambling to get out of the way as the damn thing was a little closer than they thought it'd be. The only person remotely prepared for this was Taash who was both out of the way and then engaging with the dragon in a blink. Back and forth the three went with the beast before eventually a well aimed arrow brought it to rest for good. All three were exhausted and a little burnt but it was done, dragon was slayed, they could go home now and tell everyone about the trap the Antaam had set as well as nurse their wounds.

"I can't help but feel a little bad for her, " Bellara lamented as she helped heal their wounds for travel. She was always compassionate to what ever creatures she found and it was sweet even if said creature wanted to kill them.

"Hey, at least the Antaam couldn't blight her. " Taash said trying to be supportive. Even if they'd left her then the Antaam would have made something of her or terrorized her enough she kept chasing people out for them to take. It wasn't a full mercy because it was her and them still , but it at least made it feel better in some odd way. It still sucked but a lot of stuff sucked right now.

"Even if she tried to roast us she was still pretty cool," Rook commented, a bit unsure as to what to say. They were a watcher, watchers weren't exactly made to kill dragons let alone see them. It was luck they were well trained with a bow but their training wasn't ever meant to go against something like that. Picking off the angry skeleton or vengeful spirit from a safe distance had been the purpose of their arrows, their hand well trained and steady to hit those delicate weak points. Now they'd found a new purpose but Rook still felt like they were just winging it. Taash and Bellara were way more skilled at fighting living things that were made of flesh and meat. They also did so with respect when it was called for while Rook just felt...weird. In the Necropolis you reburied what ever woke up if you could or got someone to deal with laying the spirit to rest and then just...moved on. It wasn't really significant, it just happened, and while the dead were honored they were still often dealt with like unruly kids or chaotic animals messing stuff up. It was something light and funny usually and sometimes sad but nothing too lingering. Rook still knew and felt a need to give rites to what ever they fought of course, but they just weren't good at it. Emmrich was much better, much more dedicated to being a watcher, Rook was just a helper and felt a lot better doing basically anything else but last rites.

A harsh slap at their back that nearly sent them into the mud pulled them out of their own head. Taash always nearly took the tiny elf off their feet as if unaware of their own strength. Rook knew the opposite was true which just made it seem like some weird tease or assertion of dominance, but it did help ground them sometimes even if Taash didn't know that. Bellara had wandered off to check out some of the abandoned treasure, leaving the dragon hunter and the watcher to stand and wait for her. It was fine, Rook didn't really mind given nothing was trying to kill them and the weather was nice enough.

"You did good," Taash awkwardly praised as they crossed their arms.

"Thanks?" Rook was unsure if this was a genuine compliment or just a simple nice gesture. The whole fight they were running around like a chicken with its head cut off, just barely avoiding fire ball after fire ball. They knew they looked stupid. They always looked stupid. It was fine, Taash didn't have to be nice to cheer them up about it.

Taash cleared their throat, a light blush on their face, "Pretty killer shot at the end."

Rook blinked, "Are you...."

"No! That was a sick fight! You were hot!" Taash rambled out sounding offended. Rook had heard some Qunari were really 'into' fighting dragons and stuff, they wouldnt fault Taash for being amped up from the adrenaline if that was the case but it apparently wasn't. Taash was into them?? And their stupid running around?? What at all about Rook during that fight did it for them right now?? They were pretty sure they'd tripped at least twice over their own feet and had nearly dropped their bow a few times. Nothing about that said 'hot and sexy'.

"I mean, i did get set on fire a few times." Rook joked, the joke practically making itself. Taash loudly groaned which only fueled more laughter. A fit of rabid giggles was interrupted by the harsh shoving of lips onto another. Taash grabbed the odd collar of rooks armor, lifting them to their toes as they forcefully crashed their mouths together. It was sooty and they both smelled of smoke and sweat, Taash a bit more than Rook did, but it was exhilarating even if Rook was still laughing a bit. Fiery kisses were still something they were getting used to as well as spontaneous ones, but Rook liked it. Taash's lips were full and soft with a little bit of roughness at the edges where they chewed them sometimes, they were divine if plagued by a hunger Rook was often unprepared for.

"You suck," Taash said as they pulled apart, still holding Rook on their toes. The elf maybe weighed as much a nug, maybe less, so they were happily dangling, a cheeky smile on their face.

"And you still kissed me!" Rook said, sticking their tongue out. Taash just rolled their eyes before dropping them back onto their feet, Rook teetering slightly as the stabilized themselves. They'd touch on that when they got back to the lighthouse, Antaam could be lurking waiting or something else might have noticed the dragon had been defeated. Now was not the time to tease someone who could throw them where they pleased and do as they wished with practically zero effort.

A little flutter of a kiss was placed to their cheek, a cheery voice following it, "And now I kissed you too! Post fight kisses are good even if we are a little gross." Bellara quickly stood on her toes and gave Taash a similar kiss, the Qunari leaning down so she could reach them better. Rook couldn't disagree with her, they were a good morale boost even if they didn't really get time for it often. What was going on between Rook and Taash was a lot different than morale boosting cheek kisses but Bellara didn't need to know that. That woman had enough fuel for her current novel as is.

[offbranddragon]

violence and death and dying and blood and guts and gore and violence and viscera and fuck you fuck you fuck you fuck you fuck you fuck you

[offbranddragon]

[offbranddragon]

don’t unfollow me okay. i’m going to make a really good post one of these days. just wait.

[offbranddragon]

Love ships where its like some guy with autism and his special interest is his wife

[offbranddragon]

If you don't constantly rep your wife are you even a wife guy?? Do you even support her wack ass wizardry??? What about her cursing people?? How can you be a wife guy if you don't even support her cursing people????

@evilmememagic

[offbranddragon]

Everyone, I present to you: my wife

Look, if you ever find yourself reading some of the odd shit I write on here and asking yourself 'what the fuck is wrong with her? why is she like this?' the easy explanation is usual that I was grown in a lab and they only let me out very recently when the guild slashed funding for homunculus research, OR it was because of the curse, even odds between those two explanations a solid 90% of the time