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sulkysnape · 3 months

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PART 2 IS ON DA WAY

Severus Snape x Reader

Word Count: 5454

Warning: Mentions of abuse

A/N: Prepare for some angst. I found out about a month ago that it has been five years since I joined Tumblr. I appreciate everyone who has enjoyed my writing and can't wait for more :) Now here's a long one-shot with a possible part 2 ???

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Y/N’s life has always been quite ordinary. She lived a normal life, with normal parents, and normal friends. Nothing exciting or sporadic occurred throughout her life growing up. Her mother and father were both magic and loved each other dearly. Y/N was the perfect child. She learned quickly, did what she was told, and never broke a sweat. – On the inside however; Y/N was a mess. She lacked focus, was constantly tired, and enjoyed doing nothing.

As she went through her period of education at Hogwarts, she adapted very quickly. She met a large group of friends, excelled in most of her classes, and even joined the quidditch team. For the first time in her life, Y/N finally felt capable… – until her 7th year.

Elias Malfoy was a snarky, 7th year Slytherin. Every step he took was always taken with pride. Y/N found it charming. He seduced Y/N easily with his masked charm and pep. Y/N absolutely adored Elias and instantly planned a life with him. Elias spent the majority of his time pulling pranks with his cousin Lucius which began Y/N’s insecurities. Although Elias made time for Y/N and proved that he loved her, Y/N still yearned to have his full attention.

As many days turned to many months, Y/N’s aspiration for more love grew. She and Elias had bought a house together, talked about children, and even argued like an old couple, and yet Y/N still only saw Elias fifty percent of the time. The feeling of being lost began to flood Y/N’s thoughts once again for the first time in two years. She decided there was only one thing left to do, and began to make her escape from loneliness; as a dainty band with sparkly diamonds tripped her on the way out, she was even more lost.

Y/N shared glances with the same cocky boy she met two years ago. She was at a loss for words as she stared at the sparkling ring. Elias brought his charm from the past out once again, as he apologized to Y/N for neglecting her. The persuasion in his voice swooned Y/N instantly, as he nodded her head through tears and slipped the band on.

The wedding was simple; just like everything else in her life. She smiled ear to ear for hundreds of photos and hugged dozens of guests, whom she did not recognize for the most part. As she stood next to Elias and watched her guests leave the venue, she thought to herself about what it would be like to have a not perfect life. – The ending of her and Elias’ “honeymoon phase”, unfortunately gave her the answer to that question.

It started with heated arguments that ended in breaking a piece of furniture. It would startle Y/N, but not affect her as it’s just a piece of material. As those types of arguments became too comfortable, Elias would then begin to push and shove Y/N around. The cycle continued which ended in her quickly covering the bruises for the public eye.

She thought about leaving him several times, but never worked up the guts to actually do it. Elias warned her about what would happen if she thought about leaving. He did not want to be a divorced man. He enjoyed Y/N’s presence for public approval and power. She just so happened to also make actions that lead to undesirable consequences. Y/N was terrified of Elias’ threats. She felt stupid for falling in love with a man who was advanced at disguising his true self. So instead, she remained a prisoner.

Throughout the crazy, yet ordinary life Y/N lived, there was one thing that inspired her most: muggle studies. She enjoyed learning about all of the cool gadgets and tools muggles used and spent her days reading all about it.

She used this escapism to eventually score a position at her alma-mater as a muggle studies professor. Y/N loved her job. Her students enjoyed her personality and she loved the desire to learn. Y/N was known as the tiny professor with a constant smile, and it was nothing but the truth. Y/N made it her mission to not let her one negative attribute affect her personality, so in turn she became the happiest human to exist.

When she began her job, she made it her mission to befriend most of the staff. She heard about the numerous events that occurred the last two years, and now Sirius Black has escaped from Azkaban, so she really did not want to make any enemies. Y/N quickly became friends with McGonagall. They drank tea together in the evenings, and talked about their days in the great hall during feasts. She made her rounds through most of the staff and successfully befriended them all. The only person she had not spoken to was the gloomy potions professor that spent his days in the dungeons.

One afternoon, Y/N made her way down to the dungeons to see what the professor did all day. She poked her head through the doorway of his classroom and noticed him sitting on a stool, brewing a potion. She leaned closer to get a better view and accidentally nudged the door, causing it to creak slightly, gaining the potion master’s attention.

Y/N looked at the man with wide eyes and said “sorry…”

The man looked at her for a moment and then proceeded to stir the bubbling liquid in his cauldron.

“May I help you?” The man finally spoke with a monotone voice.

Y/N inched closer to initiate the conversation better, “I was just stopping by to see what you do down here all day.”

The man scoffed to himself, “and now you see it is nothing special.”

Y/N gave the professor a confused look, and pulled out a stool next to him. The potions master eyed the young professor with a look of surprise; as though he did not expect her to want to further the conversation. Y/N looked into the cauldron and then met his gaze.

“That is absolutely not true.” she said, “I think what you’re doing is incredibly fascinating.”

The man poured a few drops of a green gooey liquid and continued to act as if he was in shock, causing Y/N to speak again.

“Can you teach me?” She looked at him with a sparkle in her eyes.

The simple question caused the man to choke out a laugh, assuming she was mocking him. Why would a bubbly, beautiful girl like this woman ever want to spend time with him after hours?

“You just had to say no…” the girl spoke again; more distant this time.

The professor regretted his actions quickly and chimed in, “No, no” He spoke, “I was just not expecting a question of that sort.”

Y/N looked at the man more intently this time; examining the features on his face. He had wrinkles in the corners of his eyes that matched the wrinkles on his forehead; most likely caused by stress of some sort. His mouth was imprinted as a permanent frown, marking him as a very unhappy or sad man in her eyes. He seemed like a man who felt as though he was unworthy of kindness, which instantly made her connect with him more. She knew what it felt like to think negatively of herself daily, due to other people’s actions.

She moved her stool closer to the professor and made eye contact once more.

“I’m available anytime after hours,” she smiled, “My name’s Y/N by the way.”

She stuck out her hand and the man stared at it as though she was holding a decapitated head. He slowly raised his arm and grasped the small hand that belonged to the equally small professor, now known as Y/N.

“Severus.” He spoke simply.

She continued to watch him brew as they sat in silence. She recognized that he was nervous and decided to respect that, and wait for him to become more comfortable. After about an hour, Y/N had finally begun to gain Severus’ trust. He explained what he was brewing and defined each ingredient he added and Y/N listened intently. By the end of the night, the two agreed that they would meet every Wednesday, to begin their brewing lessons.

And that's exactly what they did. Every Wednesday for weeks, Y/N would end her school day, go to her chambers to change clothes and eat a snack, and then by six oclock, she would make her way to the cold dungeon.

Severus began to trust Y/N more and more each visit. He enjoyed her company. Y/N was a very happy human being. He never saw her without a smile on her face and a warm greeting. Severus was not the kind of man to enjoy the personality that Y/N had. In fact, he despised that type of personality due to most of his students. But when it came to Y/N, she was an exception that he could not explain.

Each visit was always something new. Severus picked out the most interesting potions to brew that completely fascinated Y/N. She listened intently, each time Severus explained the directions and always had a question ready. Severus adored that she was so interested in what he did best. He spent his days with insufferable students who did not care less about the proper way to brew Murtlap Essence. Y/N was like a breath of fresh air. He had never met anyone in his life who genuinely cared about his actual interests.

The two professor’s once a week meetings quickly turned into twice a week meetings after the first month of incredible memories. Y/N did not expect Severus to be the person she spent her free time with. In fact, Severus was the last person she would have imagined. Severus intimidated her when they first “met”. He did not speak and he always had an emotionless stare. During the first week of her new position, Severus acted as though she did not exist, and now one month later, she would consider Severus as the only person she could trust.

As their brewing classes continued, so did their friendship. Severus now joined in on Y/N and McGonagall’s conversations during feasts, which surprised Minerva instantly. He even joined in on their tea time in the lounge during some afternoons. Severus began to care for Y/N greatly. He looked forward to seeing her turn the corner every morning with her happy smile on her face, almost bursting from excitement of whatever story she had that morning. He would even catch himself making excuses for extra brewing days, just so he could learn more about her fascinating life.

One evening, Severus was restocking his inventory for his lesson the next day, when Dumbledore quietly appeared in the doorframe, startling Severus.

“Good evening Albus.” Severus spoke with a frustrated tone, assuming he was going to request him to do something.

“Good evening indeed, Severus.” The old headmaster spoke.

Severus watched as the man walked around the supply closet, stopping every so often to read a label on a bottle. Severus continued to restock as he waited for the headmaster to continue with his request.

“I see you’ve been spending quite some time with Ms Y/L/N lately.” Dumbledore spoke finally.

“She’s interested in brewing.” Severus stately simply.

“Ah…” Dumbledore spoke softly, continuing to scan the room.

Severus furrowed his brows, confused as to why Albus was asking about Y/N.

“If you two are…-” Dumbledore began to speak, but was quickly interrupted by Severus.

“If you are insinuating that Ms Y/L/N and I are seeing each other romantically, you are incredibly wrong.” Severus spoke firmly, but his voice had a hint of skepticism, which confused him.

Albus matched Severus’ furrowed expression and tilted his head, “My apologies,” He began, “I was told wrong.”

Severus quickly gave Dumbledore his full attention at that moment.

“Told?...” He stared at the old man.

“Professors talk Severus,” Dumbledore spoke, “It was under my impression that you two had an admiration for each other.”

“Well, I advise you to tell whoever is speaking, to confirm insinuations before spreading lies.” Severus spoke firmly.

Dumbledore took his response as a signal to leave. He apologized to the potions master and made his exit.

Severus continued to stock his supplies as he thought about what the Headmaster said. ‘Shared admirations’? That statement was far from the truth. Yes, he enjoyed Y/N’s company and cared for her deeply, but there was no way he thought of Y/N in the way Dumbledore thought. He continued to think more about the way he thought of Y/N. Was there a spark of attraction towards her? Could he actually have a heart big enough to care for another human being? He thought about this possibility for the entirety of his restocking process, until he decided to shove the thoughts aside in fear of not reading the situation right.

The next school day went by in a flash. Y/N had a pretty easy day, with long note taking and well behaved students. She went through her day waiting anxiously for her brewing lesson with Severus later that evening. She chatted with Severus and McGonagall at lunch, slightly concerned due to Severus acting slightly off. She could not pinpoint the direct issue, but realized he seemed a little spaced out. She decided on leaving him be, as she also did not like to be bothered when having a ‘moment’. She finished her day strong by cleaning her classroom and organizing her lesson plans. She made her way back to her chambers around five and changed into some comfortable pants and a warm jumper. She made herself a cup of warm tea and ate a leftover pumpkin pastie from their trip to Hogsmeade the other day. By the time she was finished, it was almost six oclock, so she made her way down to Severus’ office.

The walk to the dungeons was one of Y/N’s favorites. The change in temperature is pretty quick once you reach the last flight of stairs to the dungeon. The corridor to Severus’ classroom was long and gloomy. The architecture on the walls were finely chiseled into detailed textures. Walking into Severus’ classroom, the lighting remains dark and gloomy, besides the handful of floating candles in the sky. The classroom was fairly large, with multiple desks and an elevated area, where Severus brews his potions. A decent sized supply closet was located in one corner of the room and directly across was a gargoyle statue. There were high windows that surrounded the classroom, covered in greenish brown moss. The windows gave no light due to the fact that the classroom was underwater.

Y/N walked into Severus’ classroom and quickly noticed him laying out ingredients on the table. She watched him organize the vials and containers, noticing he still seemed a little spaced out.

“What are we making today?” She asked, trying to distract him from whatever he was thinking about.

Severus turned to look at Y/N, softening his gaze as he spoke, “Amortentia.”

Y/N sat down on her usual stool and Severus did the same.

“Amor is a Roman god of love, and the word ‘Amour’ in French means ‘Love’.” Severus began to speak.

“‘Tentia’, is also Latin for ‘held’... This spell is the most powerful love potion to exist. Most underestimate this potion, but it is not a lighthearted mixture.” He explained.

“I don’t think love should ever be underestimated.” Y/N chimed in, causing Severus to look at her with a little more intent.

Severus began to show her the steps to brewing the potion. He measured out the Ashwinder egg, rose thorn, peppermint, powdered moonstone, and pearl dust equally, and explained to Y/N the proper way of brewing them. She stirred the mixture until a visible steam rose from the cauldron. The two waited in silence until Severus motioned that the potion was ready.

Severus slowly leaned in toward the bubble cauldron in front of him. He did not choose today's brew randomly. He spent his whole night prior, thinking about what Dumbledore said in his supply closet. He struggled with deciding what his true feelings were, so the best solution was to ask for Amortentia’s help. He held his breath as he inched closer to the cauldron. Once he was close enough, he inhaled slowly, breathing in every fume from the mixture. A sweet smell of vanilla hit his nostrils. The potent waves of spices were instantly recognizable with the memory of Y/N’s daily entrances to the Great Hall. Each time she took her seat next to Severus, the same spicy vanilla scent intruded his nose. As he inhaled the fumes again, he smelled a hint of lemon and honey. The same lemon and honey scent that came from Y/N’s breath due to her tea obsession. He thought about the combination of smells he recognized and thought of every possibility, but they all led back to Y/N. It would make sense that he had a sense of attraction toward Y/N. They are together most of the time and she is a very likable person.

“I don’t think we did it right,” Y/N spoke, interrupting his thoughts.

She leaned in and inhaled the fumes, but could not understand why she did not smell anything. She continued to try and smell something, but there was no use. Severus was confused as well, being that seconds ago, he most certainly smelled something.

“Are you ill? Could your sinuses be clogged?” Severus questioned.

“I’m healthier than ever.” Y/N replied.

She proceeded to sniff the steam flowing out of the cauldron, but accomplished nothing. Severus thought of all the possibilities for the potion not working for Y/N, but he had never heard of such a case.

“I think it might be in your head.” Severus said jokingly, not realizing Y/N was becoming frustrated.

“Obviously I’m not.” She said sternly, “I think you measured out the wrong ingredients. Do you smell anything?”

Severus hesitated. He obviously could not tell her what he truly smelled. Especially if he did not know if she felt the same way.

“Umm…” He stopped for a moment, “I did.”

Y/N scoffed to herself, causing Severus to sigh in relief that she did not question what he smelled.

“Oh well, we can try again tomorrow.” She groaned to herself as she began to clean up.

They cleaned their supplies in silence with casual comments here and there. Once everything was in order, they said their goodbye in a more awkward manner than usual. Y/N grabbed her things and walked out of the door to head to her chambers.

She thought about the potion error as she walked the hallways. They have never messed up a potion in the past, so why did they mess up today? She remembered Severus’ spaced out mood that occurred all day and questioned whether that was the reason they had an error. She went through the steps they took while brewing in her head and then replayed the memory of her smelling the potion in her head. ‘She did smell nothing right?’ She thought carefully about her senses at that moment and recalled what she smelled. Spicy cinnamon and nutmeg with a hint of herbal, woodsy tones was the first scent that hit her nose. This was a smell that was always in the air, so she knew it was nothing special. The next scent that was in the air was the smell of parchment and old books. It smelled fresh, yet aged. She thought about any other memories and could not recall anymore. They must have made a mistake. As she approached her chamber’s door, she was on her fourth round of analyzing the scents she smelled. As she turned the door handle and pushed open the door, she instantly froze. The cinnamon and nutmeg mixture that she believed was a constant smell, was unconsciously revealed to her as the smell of Absinthe. Anytime Severus walked past her, the same Absinthe smell would burn her nostrils. The parchment and old book smell was also a consistent smell with Severus. Y/N always enjoyed that smell, but never really pinpointed that it belonged to Severus. She stood in her doorway as she went through shock. She could not have an attraction toward Severus. She was a married woman. Yes, her marriage was nothing, but a piece of paper at this point, but that was not her worry. If Elias were to ever find out she was trying to move on, she would never see the light of day. Elias was a scary man when he was angry. Y/N did not want to see what he was capable of if she disobeyed his threats, and she especially did not want Severus to also experience those consequences.

She quickly entered her chambers and thought about her realization. She thought of all the possibilities, but concluded that the only right answer was to ignore her newly developed attraction.

Y/N spent the next few days avoiding Severus. Their last encounter was quite awkward and after thinking about her epiphany, her “suppressed” feelings began to grow. Severus acknowledged her avoidance. He was afraid that he might have made Y/N uncomfortable, and did not want to overstep boundaries. They lived their lives as though it was Y/N’s first week at Hogwarts; complete strangers. Y/N did not enjoy the unwanted silent treatment that she was giving Severus. She knew that she was doing it to protect him and herself, but he was the only person she wanted to speak to. Elias visited the castle a few times during their mutual “break”. He complained to Y/N that she was away too long. She tried to explain to him that she could not just leave whenever she wanted, but there was no point in explaining things to him. They argued numerous times during his visit; loud enough to cause shared glances by whoever was in the hallway, but not loud enough to create worry. Elias left a few bruises on clothed areas of Y/N’s body, which was no surprise to her. Elias made her idea of her self-worth plummet. Compliments never escaped his mouth; only deep rooted insults and verbal abuse. She feared sleeping at night; worried Elias would finally decide to rid her from his life permanently. She wished every day that she could escape the nightmare that was their marriage, but of course, that would never happen.

Elias left on a Friday. Y/N was so thankful. She decided to relieve some stress by going to The Three Broomsticks. She bundled up and made her journey to Hogsmeade. She arrived at the pub around eight oclock, and quickly ordered a shot of fire whiskey. She threw the burning liquid to the back of her throat and then motioned for another, followed by a glass of Daisyroot Draught. She sat at the bar alone with her thoughts…just how she liked it. An hour went by and Y/N was feeling warm inside as she was on her third glass of her favorite draught.

Just as she was about to motion for the barman to get her another shot of fire whiskey, the door to the pub swung open and was quickly covered by a large figure that was head to toe in loose, black cloth. Y/N instantly knew who it was that entered the pub, and the person quickly recognized her as well. Y/N gave Severus a soft smile, inferring that she was not upset with him. Severus took this as an invitation to join her at the bar. He studied her movements and expression for several moments to make sure she was still not upset with him.

“How have you been?” She broke the silence.

“The same as usual.” Severus replied.

He motioned for the barman to replace their empty mugs with a fresh draught, along with a shot of firewhiskey for the both of them. The two sipped on their drinks and chatted every so often about their work day.

The clock eventually hit 10 O’clock and the barman made the decision to cut Y/N off for the night. She was noticeably intoxicated and both Severus and the barman knew that she did not need more.

“Walk me home?” Y/N turned to Severus.

He nodded his head and helped her gain her balance from standing up. He watched her carefully as she made her way to the coat rack to grab her yellow jacket. She slowly pushed her arms through the sleeves of her jacket, then turned to Severus to signal him to leave.

The two walked quietly, side by side toward the castle. Small sighs of breath that escaped from each other’s mouths every so often, was the only thing heard.

“Do you have plans for the holidays?” Y/N broke the silence.

“If you call reading and grading work ‘plans’...then yes.”

Y/N giggled to herself and looked up at the stars. Severus watched as her eyes darted towards different constellations.

“I believe I'm staying here too…” she began, “Maybe I can join you one night?”

Severus’ mouth formed a small smile as he made eye contact with Y/N.

“I would enjoy that.” He grinned, holding the castle door open for her.

Y/N walked forward and made her way down the long corridor. She blushed to herself as she noticed Severus catching up to her. The voice inside of her head scolded her as she turned towards Severus. He looked at her once more as he opened his mouth to speak.

“Would you like some tea?”

The rose color returned to Y/N’s cheeks as he nodded her head yes. The two turned towards Severus’ quarters and walked in silence down the long corridor. Severus held the door to his chambers open for Y/N once more and watched as she walked inside. He shut the door behind him and made his way to the tiny kitchen to brew some tea.

Y/N walked around the cold room and examined his living area. The walls were all stone; completely bare with the exception of two windows, fully submerged under the green lake. He lacked interior design, making the small room feel very cold and wet. He had two small, black sofas, each with matching pillows. Two, large bookshelves stood against the walls across from the sofas, with a stone fireplace in between. His kitchen looked similar to hers. It was very small, but had all of the necessities. He had a small table a few feet away from the kitchen, with two chairs placed on opposite ends.

The sound of the kettle whistling broke Y/N from her thoughts. She watched as Severus moved the kettle from the burner and pulled out two mugs. Y/N walked over to one of the couches and sat down. She watched as Severus poured each of them a cup of tea and stirred in a few spoonfuls of sugar. He carried them over to the couches and carefully sat them down on the coffee table. Severus took a seat on the other side of the couch and sipped on his tea. Y/N followed his lead as she sipped from the mug. The sweet floral taste of oolong tea flooded her taste buds.

“Is there a reason you’re not going home for the holidays?” Severus interrupted the silence.

Y/N looked up from her tea as her eyes met with Severus’ onyx eyes.

“I just prefer to stay here.” She answered with an unconfident voice.

“I, as well.” Severus retorted as he made himself more comfortable.

Y/N studied his movements as she thought back to their last brewing session. She battled with her internal voice about choosing her happiness over her fear. She thought of a possible life with Severus numerous times over the course of the last few weeks. She imagined herself moving her belongings from her “shared” home with Elias and never returning. As she laid out all of the positives, only one thing was stopping her. Y/N knew the second she tried to leave her unwanted marriage, Elias would quickly put a stop to it. Divorce was an unacceptable subject in his family. Elias would ruin his image if he were to be a divorced man.

Y/N knew it was impossible to leave her husband, but the handful of fire-whiskey shots shouted at her to ignore that risk and admire Severus’ features instead. She watched as he gazed at her respectfully. She inched herself across the couch to sit closer to him.

“I’m sorry I gave you the silent treatment.” Y/N finally murmured.

Severus regained his attention back to the young professor, but chose not to speak.

“I panicked after our brewing session.” She started again, “I realized on my walk home…the potion was not made wrong.”

“Is that so?” Severus responded, waiting for more.

“I thought I smelled nothing…truly.” She began explaining herself, “And then I realized, the reason I smelled nothing was because I was so used to smelling you.”

Severus remained silent as Y/N hid her flushed face. She began to panic as she noticed he was not speaking.

“I apologize if I made things uncomfortable…” She stuttered, “I wasn’t sure if I should say anything at all, but-”

He did not allow her to finish, swallowing her words with the press of his lips against hers. She stiffened in response to his touch, nerves flooding in. She focused her mind on what was happening. His mouth was pained, but gentle with traces of sadness. Warmth consumed her and she leaned into the kiss as Severus’ lips quickly became irresistible.

Severus’ mind was engulfed with thousands of thoughts. He did not know he had the confidence to kiss the woman in front of him and did not expect for her to kiss him back. Her lips were soft, almost like silk. Her warm breath tickled his nose as he ran his fingers through her tangled hair, deepening the kiss. Her lips tasted of spicy cinnamon from the fire-whiskey she drank prior. Her chest pressed against his as he nudged his nose against hers. Her breaths began to get louder as he noticed her kisses becoming hesitant.

Y/N deepened the kiss, breathing in Severus’ scent to take it all in one last time. She squeezed her eyes shut as she tried to force herself to remember this moment. She felt Severus’ hands slip from her hair as she pulled herself away, hiding her face. Her eyes remained closed as she caught her breath and thought about what to say.

“I-I’m sorry…” She stuttered, “We can’t do this.”

Severus furrowed his eyebrows, “And why is that?”

Y/N’s anxiety heightened as she pondered about what she was going to say. She created every possible story, but decided the best thing to do was to tell the truth, without telling him everything.

She met his gaze and took another breath, “We can’t do this because…” Second thoughts attempted to take over, “I’m married.”

Severus sat back and regained his thoughts for a moment. He did not understand. He has known Y/N for a very long time now, and he has never once heard of her being married. She never spoke about it and neither did the professors around the castle. The room was still spinning from the numerous drinks before, which made comprehending this information even more difficult. The more he understood, the more angry he became at himself. Did he have the wrong intentions? Y/N admitted to smelling him from the amortentia, but he did not know if she truly wanted him to kiss her.

His eyes regained focus as he noticed Y/N standing up from the couch. He re-entered reality and quickly focused his attention on the small professor standing in front of him.

“I’m so sorry.” She began, “I really should have said something sooner.”

Before he could get another word out, she disappeared in front of him as she drunkenly walked to the door. He attempted to speak, but had no idea what to say. His eyes watched as the door to his chambers closed behind Y/N, leaving him in silence.

226 notes · View notes

sulkysnape · 3 months

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Guardian

It was a normal rainy day on Spinners End. Y/n slowly walked down the street under her light yellow umbrella with a bag full of groceries they needed for the house. She breathed in the wonderful scent of the freshly fallen rain and the plants surrounding her. After several minutes of walking she finally reached the front door of her brick house.

Y/n hurried in as she tried to escape the rain, throwing off her rain boots and putting down her umbrella and laying it in the corner to dry. She walked to the kitchen and began to put the milk and eggs she bought into the refrigerator.

“A little wet out there?” A voice appeared, startling y/n.

She giggled as she watched Severus lean in the doorframe, nice and toasty in his black t-shirt and black ‘comfy’ pants.

“Just a tad” She smiled as she continued to put away the groceries “so what have you been up to?”

“Just reading over a few potions books and watching the rain from the window” He smiled softly.

Once y/n was finally done putting away her groceries, she joined Severus in their sitting room. As she walked over to Severus’ warm, tan armchair, she pushed away some old potions books, tissues, and pillows and placed herself onto Severus’s lap.

“I missed you..” She whispered squeezing closer to his body.

“I missed you too love..” He squeezed her back.

The two remained that way for hours. Just listening to the rain hitting the shingles on the roof soon putting y/n into a deep sleep.

When she woke up, she was alone. She looked around the room to check where Severus was, but he was nowhere to be seen. She walked to the kitchen to fix herself some coffee. As she grabbed her favorite mug to pour the coffee into, a voice startled her once more.

“Why aren’t you using the cream?” Severus questioned her as he sat at the small kitchen table.

“You usually use it more, and there’s only a small bit left” y/n answered.

She joined Severus at the table and began to sip her black coffee. After several moments of silence, a noise overcame the household; the doorbell.

Y/n quickly got up and made her way towards the front door. She opened the door, revealing her sister on the other side. The two exchanged hugs and walked to the kitchen. Instead of Severus greeting y/n’s sister when she walked in, Severus was once again nowhere to be found. Y/n furrowed her eyebrows as she looked around, but decided not to question it. The two sat at the table and began to talk.

“We should go out y/n.” Her sister spoke as she held onto one of y/n’s hands “it would be good for you”

y/n sighed and shook her head “I haven’t been in the mood lately” she replied.

“How about just for some tea? It will be fun” She insisted.

The two sat in silence for several seconds as y/n began to think. Finally, she sighed once more and nodded “I just have to run upstairs for a second.”

Y/n took her coffee to the sink and then proceeded to go upstairs. She walked into the bedroom, revealing Severus in the rocking chair reading a book.

“I didn’t want to interrupt” He explained.

“Me and Sophia are going out for tea if that’s ok” Y/n informed him.

Severus gave her a soft smile and nodded “have fun love”.

The car ride to the tea shop was not very long. In fact it was just down the road. As the two sisters walked inside the shop to order their tea, y/n was startled as she bumped into someone on accident.

“I am so sorry” A male voice spoke as y/n regained her balance.

“No no it’s absolutely fine” She smiled.

“I’m Oliver” The young, handsome man introduced himself “After bumping into you I believe it’s only right for me to buy you tea”

Y/n smiled “I’m y/n” as the two walked towards the counter to order.

After ordering their tea, y/n invited Oliver to join her and her sister to sit and chat. Before coming to the cafe, y/n expected them to be there for only a half hour, but that soon turned into over an hour.

An hour and a half later the 3 finally stood up, preparing to part ways.

“It was nice meeting you y/n” the young man smiled. “We should do this again sometime”

“And you, Oliver” She smiled back, shaking his hand “I think that would be fun”

The two exchanged numbers and finally parted ways.

Once y/n arrived home, she went inside to tell Severus of her new friend. The couple sat in the sitting room and y/n told him everything Oliver told her as Severus listened and smiled.

~~~

Weeks went by and y/n and Oliver met up every Tuesday for tea. After every meet, Oliver always walked y/n home to make sure she made it safe and y/n went inside to tell Severus of their chats.

One Tuesday night, Oliver and y/n were walking home like usual. As they reached the front door of her brick house, Y/n turned to give Oliver a smile and a goodbye, but as she turned she noticed a weird look on his face.

“Is everything alright?” She asked.

Oliver smiled and nodded his head “Everything is great actually.” He moved closer to move a piece of hair that was flying in the wind.

Out of nowhere, Oliver took her by surprise. Instead of backing up after fixing her hair, Oliver moved in closer, planting a kiss right onto y/n’s lips. Of course this took her by surprise, but y/n was unable to move away. Was she enjoying this?

After several seconds, Oliver finally pulled away from the kiss leaving y/n with her mouth wide open.

“I’ll see you next Tuesday” Oliver smiled as he turned to walk home.

y/n slowly backed up and walked into her home. She usually told Severus everything about their meets, but could she tell him this? Y/n didn’t think she wanted to kiss Oliver, but the second he did it she had a happy feeling in her chest. Did she have feelings for this boy?

“How was it?” A voice interrupted her thoughts.

Y/n whipped around quickly, looking at her husband standing on the stair steps.

“I-It was fun” She smiled.

Her mind was racing, but quickly stopped as something caught her eye. Severus had a suitcase.

“W-what is that for?...” She pointed at the suitcase.

“You know what it’s for y/n” He looked at her softly.

“No. No Severus you can’t leave” She walked towards him. “You cannot leave me Severus”

Her husband picked up bis suitcase and walked down the rest of the staircase, placing it at the bottom as he walked towards her.

“It’s time y/n. I was here for a reason. It’s time for you to let go” He looked into her glossy eyes.

“I can’t let go Severus. I’m- I’m not ready” Tears threatened to spew down her cheeks.

He placed his hands on each side of her body “Yes you are love. I know how you feel about Oliver. He’s making you happy now.”

“It’s only been a year..” She whispered.

Severus pulled her in for a long, warm hug.

“I know love, but I’ve stayed longer than I should have. I just needed to make sure you would be okay with out me. I trust Oliver. I like him. I know he will treat you the way you need to be treated” He whispered to y/n “I have to go. It’s going to hurt, but one day it won’t feel like this anymore.”

The tears finally came. Y/n understood Severus needed to leave, but she had become so used to him she almost forgot he passed away a year ago. Her friends and family had become worried for her. Ever since Severus appeared in their home on Spinners End, y/n no longer went outside unless she needed to and barely spoke to anyone. Instead she spent her time in her home with her dead husband.

After several moments of crying and hugging onto Severus tightly, she slowly released him from her grasp. She backed up and looked at the man she fell in love with 6 years ago. The man who opened up to her and let her in. The man who sacrificed his life to save an entire wizarding world. The man who she loved with all her heart.

“I’m going to let you go..” She whispered, a tear falling from her eye.

Severus was tearing up now too. He walked towards her one last time and cupped her cheeks.

“No matter what. Even if you can’t see me. I will always be watching over you and protecting you. I love you unconditionally always my love.” He spoke as he placed a kiss onto her forehead.

Y/n watched as her husband slowly backed up and picked up his luggage and walked to the door. As he opened the door, he looked back one more time and gave y/n a smile.

“It’s ok for you to love him like you loved me. I will be ok” He said for the last time as he walked out the door.

Y/n stood there in shock for several moments, tears spewing down her cheeks. She slowly walked to the sitting room and grabbed the box of tissues she pushed to the side months ago. She knew all this time she had been talking to herself, pretending Severus was still there to hold her, but now it seemed impossible to picture him holding her.

She curled into a ball in her arm chair and continued to cry until she fell asleep, knowing once she woke up in the morning, Severus would not be there to tell her good morning.

A/N: I tried to write this in a way that you guys would be surprised and not know he was dead all along until the end, but i’m not sure if i wrote it good enough. Feedback would be fantastic(: I’m sorry for the angst

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sulkysnape · 2 years

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severus snape most definitely smoked cigarettes. cigars even. that man’s days were full of wretched little shits; he hAd to take the edge off every 30 minutes.

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sulkysnape · 2 years

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Snape Quote Alphabet Chain

~me first~

A: “Ah yes… HArrY PoTTer… Our new… celebrity…”

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sulkysnape · 2 years

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sevvy headcanons

- Sev was diagnosed with OCD at a young age. He is extremely organized.

– He is always worried about smelling bad, so he brews “perfume” to make him smell good.

– When he is alone at night, he enjoys cooking a yummy dinner while singing along to the songs on the radio.

– Sev invites McGonagall over every Friday to play card games and talk about their week.

– He often prefers baths because soaking in warm water helps his long-term aching body.

– His wand often gets damaged during his tasks for Voldemort or Dumbledore, so he constantly sands his wand where parts of it chipped.

– He and Remus made a truce when he returned to teach, and would frequently grab drinks at a local pub in Hogsmeade.

– One of Sev’s life aspirations was to write his own potions book. He created outlines, but never went further because he didn’t believe it could happen.

– (During the Philosophers Stone era) Before Sev saw Harry for the first time, he revisited the flower bracelets that he & Lily made when they were children. He keeps them inside of a book to preserve them.

————

Part 2?? xx

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