#⌜i’d be home with you⌟ gen + barrel

[walkeddeath]

☎ barrellllll

Put ☎ in my ask for your muses info in my muses phone:

NAME: ben ₊˚⊹♡

RINGTONE:  decode - paramore

PICTURE: 

LAST TEXT RECEIVED: [ sms :: ben ₊˚⊹♡]  Will do, angel. See you soon.

LAST TEXT SENT: [ sms :: from genbugs iphone] sounds perfect. and just let yourself in when you get here.

[ifbench]

PMD Eternal Shadows Chapter 4: Home Sweet Home

Twig Woodland Outskirts

Light flooded my vision, before fading. Before me, was a dirt path leading into the distance up a sunset-lit hill. The trees were much sparser now, no longer forming solid walls.

“We’re out!” exclaimed Burhalla, as I heard something shatter.

What was that?!

Before I could ask what that was, Saltriv started running down the path, before stopping a few steps away, and turning around, a worried expression on their face. “Come on! I want to see my family again!” they demanded.

I could understand their worry. I’d been through something like that once, though not to this degree.

I shuddered as the memory came back. Listening to the news about how Kyogre and Groudon were rampaging near Hoenn, frantically packing only the necessities before leaving the house, getting lost in the crowd and separated from my family as everyone in Goldenrod evacuated, calling out for help to no avail...If that brawl had made its way to Johto—

“Gen! Come on!” Saltriv’s voice echoed, breaking that train of thought. I had gotten lost in my thoughts again. I needed to focus on the task at hand, that being going with Burhalla and Saltriv.

I ran towards the two, and together, the three of us headed along the path towards the sunset.

No words were spoken for some time. I think we were all just relieved to be out of that place. I know I was.

As we climbed the hill, I started to hear unfamiliar voices, though I couldn’t quite make out what they were saying. I slowed my pace a bit. I looked towards the other two, and they didn’t seem to notice them. Was I just hearing things?

Should I tell the others? Would they believe me? Would it be a good idea to keep this a secret from them after what Burhalla had said?

In the midst of me trying to figure out what to do, I saw a trio of figures emerge over the hilltop. I couldn’t tell what they were from this distance, but Burhalla seemingly could, as his footsteps halted.

“Berry crackers. I’ve been found out,” I heard him mumble under his breath.

The figures continued to approach, and I could now make them out. A Typhlosion, a Meganium, and a Porygon-Z.

There was an audible gasp, and the Meganium came barreling at us with a shout of, “SALTRIV!”

This was probably one of Saltriv’s parents, then.

Saltriv ran off from our group with a similar shout of, “MOM!”

As the two reunited, the Typhlosion approached us. Out of the corner of my vision, I noticed Burhalla’s expression pale.

“Burhalla,” the Typhlosion spoke, briefly glancing at Saltriv, before turning back to the Charmander.

“Hi, dad,” Burhalla responded after a pause.

“I understand what you were doing. Really, I do. And I’m glad that you found Saltriv. But you should have known better! You could have gone missing, or worse!” Burhalla’s father roared at him. “What if you had? What would I do? What would Valorch do? I need to have a stern talk with you once we’re home.”

I stood there awkwardly, all alone, as two contrasting conversations played out near me. I looked back and forth between Saltriv and Burhalla, barely registering the Porygon-Z following the rest of their group down the hill.

“Well, se-se-seems like Burhalla’s fine, and they even brought back Saltriv and this Oshawott! All’s well that en-en-ends well, at least!” the Porygon-Z stuttered, bringing me back to reality as I was finally addressed.

I locked eyes with the Porygon-Z, before they leaned towards me. “So what’s yo-yo-your deal? I’ve nev-ev-ever seen you around town before,” they asked.

“I’m Gen,” I responded, taking note of their...odd speech pattern. I remember learning that Porygon-Zs were unstable. Was that still true in this world?

“Where are you from-om-om? My memory banks indicate the Oshawo-wo-wott family not being common on the Thunder continent,” they continued, their tone changing midway through to a more robotic one.

What now? Do I tell them what I told Saltriv and Burhalla, since the two of them were right there? Would the Porygon-Z be able to tell it was a lie? I didn’t remember if the Porygon line were normal-type or psychic-type. Either way, I needed to decide, and quickly, before anyone got suspicious.

“I don’t remember,” I lied, hoping I made the right choice, or at least the best choice I could at this point.

“You do not recall what lo-lo-location you are from?! That’s ve-ve-very worrying,” the Porygon-Z replied, their tone again switching as they spoke.

The conversation between Burhalla and his father stopped, as did the one between Saltriv and their mother.

"Oh, I'm sorry. I didn't even notice you. I was a bit...caught up," the Meganium said, with a glance towards Saltriv. “You really don’t remember where you’re from? What do you remember?” the Meganium continued, worry seeping into their voice.

“Just my name, and how to do some things,” I parroted back my response to when Burhalla had asked that question, causing the look of worry on the Meganium’s face to worsen.

“I’m not sure if I should believe you. You’re not faking it, trying to pretend to be another amnesiac human sent to save the world?” the Typhlosion interrogated. “There’s been four Pokemon who tried lying about that just this month.”

My confidence shattered with his words. I couldn’t tell the truth now, after what Burhalla had said. Plus, given what the Typhlosion was saying, they definitely wouldn’t believe the truth. I could ponder this more later, though, for now, I had to reply.

“I’m telling the tru-” I began, before I heard Saltriv speak up.

“It’s true. He couldn’t even remember how to use moves,” they defended.

The Typhlosion looked like he wanted to say something, and began to open his mouth, but Burhalla interjected.

“I saw it too. He couldn’t even remember how to use Water Gun. He never mentioned being a human, either,” Burhalla backed up Saltriv and myself. I shot a grateful look towards him, and he nodded silently in response.

“Can’t we talk about this more once we’re in town?” Saltriv pleaded. “I want to see dad again.”

“That sounds like a splen-len-lendid idea! Le-le-let’s go back to the village,” the Porygon-Z spoke, before floating towards the hilltop.

“If we don’t start heading back soon, we won’t return before nightfall,” the Meganium said, before following behind the Porygon-Z alongside Saltriv.

The Typhlosion hesitated for a moment, before starting back up the hill. I did the same, Burhalla walking alongside me once I caught up to him.

“You are telling me the truth, right?” he questioned, turning to me, a look of suspicion on his face. “You’re not another Pokemon doing that for attention?”

“I’m not,” I hastily responded. It was true for one of his questions, at least.

His expression changed to a more neutral one. “Ok. I don’t want to have to deal with more people keeping secrets from me.” He turned back towards the setting sun.

He muttered, “Hopefully dad won’t be too harsh once I’m home.” I decided not to comment.

This lie couldn’t end well.

Soon, we reached the hilltop, and the view beyond became clear. I gawked at what was on the other side.

There was a massive clearing in the middle of an even more massive forest down below. In it, there was what looked like buildings, and tiny specks migrating from place to place. The entire area was shrouded in a light layer of fog. Was this Overcast Village?

I wasn’t left with much time to process it, as the group continued onwards, down the hill, forcing me to follow them, lest I be left behind.

For a while, silence pervaded through the group, as we descended the hill. It wasn’t until we reached the forest that someone spoke up again.

“Where did you find Saltriv, anyways?” the Meganium asked Burhalla, as we walked along the foggy path.

“They were talking with Gen at the end of the dungeon,” Burhalla answered.

“Really? How long had you two been talking?” the Meganium asked, turning towards Saltriv and myself.

“Not for long. I woke up, Saltriv was there, we just introduced ourselves to each other, then Burhalla arrived,” I answered.

“I just woke up there, and Gen was the first person I saw before Burhalla had found us,” Saltriv corroborated.

The Meganium took a moment to take in this information, then continued onwards.

Soon, the trees cleared up, and the path stopped at a wide stone circle covered in fog.

“Welcome to Overcast Village!” Burhalla announced to me.

Overcast Village

It didn’t seem nearly as big as Goldenrod, but what it lacked in size, it made up for in wonder. I walked towards the center of the circle to get a better look at my surroundings. Right to the left of where the path ended was a bulletin board, filled with posters depicting many Pokemon. A Tyrogue was looking over the papers on it. Next to it, was a large tent in the shape of a Kecleon’s head, underneath which was an assortment of boxes guarded by a Torterra. On the other side of the path was some sort of strange box with many mechanisms on it. Heading away from it was a Pokemon with short arms, a V-shaped head, and a wispy tail, carrying what looked to be its pre-evolution on its head. There were many stone roads leading out of the circle, lined with houses that grew progressively fainter the further into the fog they were. Down one road that a Leafeon was walking across, I could barely see another stone circle like the one I currently stood on.

It wasn’t quite like anything I had seen before. There were so many Pokemon here, and yet I felt so alone.

I was jolted out of my thoughts as Burhalla’s father spoke up. “Time to go home,” he stated, before starting down one of the roads.

“Wait, but-” Burhalla began, but the Typhlosion interrupted him before he could finish.

“No ‘buts’. We’re going home, now,” the large fire-type said, before ushering Burhalla down one of the roads. Burhalla turned towards me with an apologetic expression, and before I could protest, he disappeared into the fog.

Now what? Burhalla had offered to help me out, and now he was gone, at least for the time being.

I looked over towards the remaining members of our group. The Porygon-Z was already heading down the road Burhalla and his father went down, leaving just me, Saltriv, and the Meganium, the latter two of which were conversing with the Torterra under the Kecleon-shaped tent. I heard a loud shout of “Saltriv!” from an unfamiliar voice. Was that the Torterra?

Hopefully Saltriv would be willing to help. Otherwise, I was in trouble.

I walked over towards the tent, and pleaded, “Can I stay with you all for the night? I don’t have anywhere to go.”

“Of course! Right, mom?” Saltriv answered almost immediately. I wasn’t expecting a response that quickly.

“We’ll have to discuss it first, but I’ll consider it,” the Meganium responded, causing my expression to fall. “You should have told me soone-”

“They helped heal me when I got poisoned in that dungeon! Please?” Saltriv added.

“Why not?” the voice from before spoke up. I realized it was the Torterra, who was now facing me. “We have enough room, anyways. You helped save Saltriv, we should pay you back somehow.”

“Thanks, dad!” Saltriv exclaimed, their expression full of joy. That Torterra must be their father, then.

“Looks like you can come with us then, Gen,” the Meganium stated, as I felt my mouth form into a smile. I had somewhere to live here now! At least, for tonight. I doubted I’d be able to stay much longer, if I was even still here tomorrow, and didn’t wake up back home.

“Let’s head home. Night is almost upon us.” the Torterra said, exiting the tent. The Meganium started towards a road next to an oddly apple-shaped house. Saltriv and their father followed, and so did I.

We walked down the foggy road for a short while, passing by many Pokemon I did and didn’t recognize, until Saltriv broke the silence. “There’s not as many Pokemon around as I remember.”

“There’s been a lot of disappearances since you’ve been gone. You’ve probably already noticed the Kecleon brothers,” Meganium responded, a twinge of worry noticeable in her voice. “Did Burhalla already tell you about that?”

“He did,” Saltriv answered. “Has it really been months since I...disappeared?”

“Unfortunately, it has been,” Torterra replied. “We can talk more about that tomorrow. Right now, you’re back, and that’s all that matters.”

Eventually, the others stopped, as we came to a house that looked like four massive pumpkins joined together, with gigantic leaves topping two of them, and a tree on top of a third.

“We’re here,” Meganium announced, as the three of them entered a wide doorway, and I quickly followed suit.

Saltriv’s Home

It was quite spacious. To my right, there were entrances to the other rooms. In one corner of the room I was in, on the wall, were several cabinets, with small handles that resembled loops more than anything else. Underneath them was what seemed to be a radio on top of a table, yet no chairs. That’s probably to be expected, though. All the Pokemon that lived here were quadrupedal, and I didn’t know if chairs even existed in this world. The left side of the room held a bookshelf, every shelf filled with a colorful assortment of books, piquing my interest. What kind of literature did Pokemon have? I’d have to check that out later, assuming it was in a language I could read.

“Wait here. I’ll get the guest bed,” Meganium said, before heading into another room, Torterra following after her, leaving me and Saltriv alone.

The silence was quickly broken, as Saltriv spoke up. “You really do have amnesia? You’re not faking it like Burhalla’s dad said?”

“I really do. Barely can remember anything,” I lied, before questioning if I really did need to keep this up. Burhalla was away, I presumably wasn’t in danger anymore, and the topic was right. Plus, Saltriv had memories of that platform, apparently. Maybe if I told them my memories of that place, they’d believe me?

“Not even about being a human or something?” they pressed.

“Nope,” I responded after a few moments. I weighed the odds. At best, Saltriv believes me, doesn’t tell anyone, and can help me get back home. However, it was far more likely that they wouldn’t believe me, especially after what Typhlosion said. Worst case scenario, Saltriv’s family kicks me out, Burhalla is told, and I have no one to help me figure out this world.

“Anything in particular you do remember?” they continued.

“Just my name, and a few other things,” I answered. I couldn’t risk it. It wasn’t worth the potential loss.

“What kinds of things?” they asked.

Before I could get a chance to even think how to respond, Meganium poked her head into the room we were in. “Everything’s all set! This way!” she told us, before turning back around. Saltriv ran after her, and so did I. It wasn’t long before we entered our destination.

It wasn’t nearly as large as the first room of the house, but there was still a great deal within it. On the far side of the room, there were two straw mats, a thin blanket and a pillow beside each. Next to them was a wide, plain-looking box, bursting with an assortment of various items, some I recognized, some I didn’t. Among them was a strange gadget with a screen in the middle, and a glowing blue orb at the top. Was that some kind of Pokedex or something? On the ceiling was an open window, letting the last rays of sunlight for the day shine down upon the left mat.

“Your bed is the one on the right,” Meganium pointed out, as Saltriv rushed into the straw mat on the left, lit by a quickly diminishing amount of sunlight. Those must be the beds, then. They didn’t look very comfortable.

“Get along, you two,” Meganium asked the two of us. “I don’t want a repeat of last time.”

“We will!” Saltriv assured. “He saved my life! Of course we’ll get along!”

“Just making sure,” Meganium clarified, before heading out of the room.

I walked over to the unlit mat, dreading what would come next. I braced myself, then flopped onto the bed of straw, finding it...much more comfortable than I expected. Huh.

“You looked like you’ve never seen a bed before!” I heard Saltriv exclaim in bewilderment. “Haven’t you slept at all since you forgot everything?”

“I haven’t. Waking up in that clearing with you is the first thing I remember,” I lied.

“Weird. You should tell me exactly what you do remember! Or you could write it down in a journal! I think I have a spare one somewhere.”

“Can we do that tomorrow?” I pleaded. “I’m tired.”

“Ok! See you tomorrow!” Saltriv cheerfully replied, pulling their blanket over themself with a vine as they laid their head on a pillow.

As I tucked myself in, I thought over everything that had happened today.

There was whatever had happened on that platform in that psychedelic void. There was that mailbox that I put that paper in. What was the deal with that? There also was that really soft bow, that changed colors. Then my reflection turned into an Oshawott, just like I am now. After that was all those Pokemon with shadowy auras, and that note, telling me to save one. Was Saltriv the one I saved? Who wrote that, anyway? Did that have anything to do with what Burhalla said about “going shadowy”? And then there was that terrifying giant hand coming down for me. I’m not sure if I wanted to know what that was. And somehow Saltriv remembered it all? That place had made even less sense than this world did.

Not that this world made much sense, either. I’m somehow an Oshawott now, just like my reflection on that platform. Pokemon lived in towns here, but there were also wild Pokemon, too? Burhalla also did two Embers one after the other back in Twig Woodland. I was almost certain moves couldn’t be used that quickly after each other. There was also that shattering sound once we exited the dungeon. I still had no clue what that was about. Speaking of mystery dungeons, those also didn’t make any sense at all. Something like that happening naturally was an impossibility with the laws of physics as I remembered them.

At least I met Saltriv and Burhalla. They had offered to help me. Saltriv already was, convincing their family to let me stay the night here. I really needed to thank them once I woke up, and Burhalla, too.

They’ve really been a big help so far, even if they might have suspicions that I’m lying.

Why did I even start that lie, anyways? All it’s caused me is trouble, and I can’t come clean now, or I’ll lose Burhalla’s trust, along with likely the trust of everyone else here.

Would they have believed me if I told the truth, though? With there apparently being Pokemon faking being amnesiac humans, not to mention humans being legends here, they probably wouldn’t.

What was the best thing to do?

Was there even a right answer to that?

Why were there Pokemon pretending to have amnesia, anyways? Why was I an Oshawott? Why was I here at all?!

Gah, why was any of this happening?! Why couldn’t I be back home, where things actually made sense?!

What was happening back home, even? Were my family and friends ok? Did they know where I was? Were they trying to find me right now?

I want to go home. I want to go back to my family. I want to go back to the world I know.

I want to wake up back in my bed, like this all never happened.

My final thought before drifting into sleep was hoping that, somehow, despite all evidence to the contrary, this was all just a bad dream.

=======

Goldenrod City

I heard the gambler curse as the fourth card he flipped over was revealed to be a Voltorb. All 930 coins he won during this game were forfeit. I began to shuffle the cards for the next person in line, when the gambler smashed their fist against the table, causing the Doduo near him to flinch.

“Gimme another go! This time I’ll hit the level 8 jackpot!” he demanded. They never learn, do they?

“You’re back down to level 2,” I told him, as I doled out the cards, making sure to lay out the right amount of multipliers and Voltorbs. After I wrote down the multiplier and voltorb sums at the side of each row, I announced, “Begin!”

I paid little attention to his actions, instead glancing towards the empty table to my right. Gen should have been here for his shift hours ago. Where could he be?

I felt a faint buzz from my pocket. It must be closing time, then. I ignored every expletive the gambler spat at me, as I packed up my belongings and headed out the door. Closing up shop wasn’t my job, anyways.

The moment the door shut behind me, I was confronted by a disheveled mess of a man, eyes widened and eyebrows pulled together.

“Spersua! Have you seen Gen at all? You’re his coworker, right?” he questioned. Right. This was Gen’s father.

“Sorry, sir. He hasn’t turned up today. Something happen?” I asked in turn, raising an eyebrow.

All I received in reply was a cry of anguish, as he ran off.

Ok then. That was odd. Something was seriously up with Gen. Maybe I should leave him a message.

I pulled the rectangle out of my pocket, and sent a quick “U ok?” message to Gen. That should put me at ease for now.

I should get home soon. The sun was setting.

I walked down the street from the game corner, past a telephone pole adorned with a poster of a familiar visage.

I stopped, doing a double take. Yep, that was Gen alright, or at least a picture of him. And on a missing poster, too.

Well, this sucked.

Nothing I could do anything about, though.

I began to continue towards home, before a patch of blue caught my eye. A pristine blue bow, lying on the ground. I immediately nabbed it. It was unbelievably soft, more than anything I’ve felt before. I didn’t want to let go of it.

I’ll keep it. It was my favorite color, so no way was I giving it up. Maybe I could sew it on to my shirt collar or something. I bet that would look stylish.

Whoever lost it wasn’t my problem.

Hopefully Gen would turn up soon. Managing Voltorb Flip all by myself was exhausting.

Plus, I did miss him a bit.

[lunarosewood23]

28 Days of Love #2: Familial

A next gen story. Talk of adoption. Post Endwalker: Charibert and Yotsuyu have a Conversation:tm:.

AKA: How to ask your partner of over 5 years if she wants kids while trying to not admit that you’ve gotten attached to a darling little girl that barreled head first into your legs at work. A guide by Charibert Cross.

Or: An excuse to finally finish an old FFXIVWrite prompt from 2021...

Previous post!

Prompt List!

~~~

Charibert sighed as he walked into the cottage he shared with Yotsuyu and sank to the floor as he thumped his head against the door. The day may not have been long, but by the Fury...

That little girl who bolted to him of all gods damned people, even though his sister was right there, begging to not be taken away again.

He sighed as he clasped his hands in prayer, asking for guidance and strength to talk to his partner about possibly taking her in, even if just for a short time. 

He must’ve sat there for longer than he planned when he felt slightly chilly hands gently unclasp his only to intertwine their fingers, her nails a simple red compared to the softer pink with lighter star rubies that his own were.

“I’m glad to see you home, but did something happen that caused you to be home so early?” Yotsuyu asked.

He opened his mouth to speak but realized that a lump had formed in his throat. Where was he even supposed to begin with this?

Ugh he wished he had poked Raven for help about this...

"There was...I’m not entirely sure where to begin really."

Yotsuyu gave him a small smile as she stood before holding her hands out for him to take, marveling at the way the purple and white of her skirt moved. "How about at the beginning, perhaps over tea? I was about to brew some for myself when I saw you by the door."

"That would be wonderful, thank you." He replied as he took her hands. "May I try the blend your parents sent?"

"I had been thinking the same. They sent a jasmine tea earlier this sennight that I enjoy." She offered.

He smiled as she set to work with the kettle, watching her for a second before walking up to her and wrapping his arms around her shoulders, his embrace warm but loose to where she could shrug him off if she wished.

"I love you."

"I love you too my dear." She replied, leaning into his embrace and breathing him in, the smell of fire and incense. She knew something was wrong and she turned to look at him properly. "Nervous is not a good look for you huǒ hè, what happened today?"

Charibert took a breath as he hugged her tighter. "Raven had asked me to help with a possible arson case. We did a sweep through of the area and while taking a break...it turned out there was a survivor. A child, barely four summers."

"Oh no..." She breathed as she reached up to gently rub his back. "She is a little older than you were, correct?"

He nodded slowly as they sat down. "I want to help her. However I don't want to do so if that's not something you want to do as well. My heart may be hurting for her but I don’t want to spring this on you without warning."

She blinked but soon let out a sigh. She knew he was attached already just from what she knew of his background.

"That's quite a few words for saying you wish to adopt the girl." She mused.

She couldn’t help but softly giggle at the shocked expression on his face that she knows he will deny making.

"N-not adopt her! I..." He tried to say, but he knew she knew he wasn't fooling her. "I'd like to, if nothing else, allow her to stay here until we find relatives or a better home for her. But as I said, if you don’t want to then that's the end of it. I promise."

He looked away from her, he knew he was making a mess of this. He should've known better.

There are many reasons I shouldn't be around children, this being one, minor as it is compared to my horrific war crimes. The second I get attached I will be told no and I won't make her take a responsibility she didn't ask for.

"Chari, darling, breathe." Yotsuyu commands softly in her lovely voice as she takes one of his hands to hold soothingly. When he does she smiles at him. "If I may be honest with you, I don't know if I'm actually ready for parenting. Babysitting our nieces and nephews is one thing, but actually raising a child...it is not something I believe I am capable of, considering everything."

"I understand. Believe me, I'm terrified as well. But if that's how you feel I won't-" He replied seriously as his face fell but she put a finger to his lips.

"Let me finish huǒ hè." She chided. "I do not believe I am capable of being a parent. However, I wouldn't be opposed to keeping her here temporarily. I can tell you are already attached to her, and something tells me she is already attached to you."

His eyes went wide, and she's charmed by how she's able to render him speechless. "Where is she?"

"At Raven’s. I told her I needed to talk to you first. As I said, I refuse to just drop something like this in your lap without warning. She said that she's due to have her child any day now, and...the girl kind of ran full speed at me and knocked me down."

"Well at least you weren't wearing your heeled sabotends today..." Yotsuyu muttered more to herself.

"Hey!" He yelped, though it came out more as a laugh.

"Am I wrong?" She shot back with a laugh. He pouted and she pressed a kiss to his cheek. "Let me change and get a coat."

[sporesmoldandfungi]

Magic - The Client

Author’s Note : Thank you all for liking and reblogging the story so far, it really means a lot! I’ve been writing this series since March 2021, which is why I’m pumping out chapters like crazy and it’s nice to see people enjoying it. I’m going to upload a masterlist as well as start requests for one shots. Thank you again so much!

Word Count : 2438

The next week was filled with remodeling, repainting and moving into the firehouse. as well as filming a promotional commercial. They also hired a receptionist named Janine. She was a short but self assured woman. She had a thick New York accent, and large circular glasses that always sat on her nose, so she could gaze at you judgingly without the glass barrier.

It was a cool fall morning, it was also the calmest day they have had since signing the lease of the firehouse. Peter was assisting in hanging the sign for their business outside the firehouse and Egon sat on the edge of Janine's desk, typing on his calculator.

Genevieve came downstairs, her hair in a messy ponytail and wearing a pair of overalls. She smiled at Janine and went to stand by Egon. "Whatcha doing?"

"Trying to figure out a pricing policy that would allow us to get out of debt as well as make a profit." he said, still looking down.

"That's heavy."

"You could say that."

The two stayed silent only for a moment or so, then it was broken by the sound of a car entering the garage.

Genevieve stood up and ran to Peter, "Is that the car?"

"If you could call it that." he scoffed.

Ray rolled down the driver's seat window and stuck his head out, "Gen! Grab the tool box, I'm gonna need help fixing the old girl."

Genevieve nodded and ran into the back office to grab the tool box. Peter looked offended that Ray didn't ask him to assist in fixing the car, but deep down, he knew he didn't want to. Genevieve returned about less than a minute later, opened the roof of the car, and bent down to begin working.

Peter began to walk over to his office, which was placed directly behind Janine's desk. He stopped when he watched Egon sneaking glances at Genevieve's bent figure over the hood of the car. He walked over to him with a smug grin, popping himself next to Egon.

"Sightseeing is my favorite part of New York, Egon. You took it a step forward, you have discovered beauty in our own home." Peter said, motioning to Genevieve's behind.

"I don't know what you're implying, Peter." Egon replied, staring down at his calculator.

"You don't have to lie to me, I know you two have the hots for each other." he said. When Peter noticed he wasn't getting Egon's attention, he grabbed his head, pulling it up to look at Genevieve. "Can't say I blame you, no man can resist that look."

Egon closed his eyes as Peter held his head up to look ahead. He hated that Peter caught him staring, he was not objectifying her the way Peter currently was. He only hoped Genevieve couldn't hear Peter's lude comments.

Janine groaned loudly, slamming her hands on her desk in frustration. Egon took this as his ticket out. He pushed out of Peter's grasp, walking over to assist Janine. Peter took one last look, then finally retreated back to his office.

There were a few minutes of quiet, busy work. No one paid any attention to the woman who stepped through the firehouse's large doors. She called out to someone as she walked in, and looked around strangely as she heard no response. She looked forward and let out a sigh of relief when she saw Janine, filing her nails at the reception desk.

"Excuse me, this is the Ghostbusters office, right?" the woman said.

Janine put down her nail file, looking up at the woman. She had long, curly brunette hair. She tightly held a purple shawl around her, looking around for the strange men she remembered from their commercial. "It is, can I help you?"

"Well I don't have an appointment, but I'd like to talk to someone, you see-"

Before the woman could finish, Peter barreled out of his office, "I'm Peter Venkman, may I help you?"

"I don't know what I have to say may sound a bit unusual." she explained.

Peter laughed, "That's all we get day in day out around this place, ms.?"

"Barrett, Dana Barrett."

Peter led the woman upstairs. Janine walked over and tapped on Genevieve's shoulder, which in turn made her jump and bump her head on the roof of the car.

"Sorry, but there's a woman upstairs with Peter. A customer figured she needs someone to save her from Peter's pervy advances" she explained.

"Yeah, probably. Thank you, Janine!" she smiled. She slid off the hood of the car and ushered for Ray to follow. She rubbed her head as she walked upstairs with Ray, the pain from hitting her head becoming more noticeable with each step. Egon was already examining the woman when they reached the second floor. There were wires attached to her temples, connected to a TV that showed a thermal reading of her head. Peter sat across from her, no doubt trying to impress her by being her knight in shining armor.

"Oh good, Ms. Barrett, these were my other colleagues I mentioned, Dr. Raymond Stanz and Dr. Genevieve Stratford." Peter said.

"Hello", Dana said, waving awkwardly.

Ray gave her a smile before leaving to grab a soda from their fridge. Genevieve returned her awkward wave, sitting on the couch, rubbing her head.

"Now Ms. Barrett, where were we?" Peter said, resuming the conversation.

"So, this voice said 'Zuul' and I slammed the refrigerator door, that was three days ago and I haven't been back to my apartment since."

"You don't normally see that kind of behavior out of household appliance. What do you think, Egon?" Peter asked.

Egon turned to Peter, blinding him with a flashlight, "She's telling the truth, or at least she thinks she is." he said, turning off the light when he noticed Peter waving his hand in front of his eyes.

"Well of course I'm telling the truth! Who would make up a story like that?" she exclaimed.

"Some who are looking for attention, others just wackos who wander off the street." Peter smirked.

Ray spoke up, "You know what it could be? Past life experience intruding on present time."

Egon walked over and grabbed a box of Cheez-its and joined Genevieve on the couch. "Could be erased memories stored in a collective conscious. I wouldn't rule out clairvoyance or telepathic contact either."

Dana laughed under her breath, "I'm sorry, I don't believe in any of that."

"That's alright, I don't either." Peter said, and the rest of the Ghostbusters looked at him skeptically. "But there are some things we do.. standard procedures in a case like this that often bring us results."

"I could go down to hall of records and check out the structural details in the building. Maybe the building itself has a history of psychic turbulence." Ray offered.

"I could look up the name 'Zuul' in unusual literature." Egon suggested.

"Spate's Catalog?" Genevieve asked.

Egon turned to her, smiling at her. She read his mind. He offered her some Cheez-It. "Tobin's Spirit Guide."

"Tell you what, I'll take back Ms. Barrett to her apartment and check her out", Peter said confidently. Genevieve scoffed and Peter corrected himself, "I'll check out Ms. Barrett's apartment, okay?"

Peter led Dana, who reluctantly followed him. The two left soon after, leaving Ray, Egon, and Genevieve alone. Egon looked over at Genevieve, who was rubbing her head still.

"Are you alright?" he asked concerningly.

She turned, taking her hand off her head when she saw that Egon noticed. "I'm fine, just a little headache."

"She's lying, she hit her head on the hood of the car." Ray called out from the kitchen.

"Traitor!" she called out to him. Genevieve turned back to Egon. "I'm fine really."

He looked at her, "I should probably give you a routine concussion inspection. Stay there." He left, walking into the back lab. Ray walked over to the couch, plopping next to Genevieve. They waited awkwardly for Egon to return. He came back in a minute or two, a flashlight and other medical tools in hand.

He kneeled in front of her, putting on a stethoscope. He placed the small circular disk on her mid-chest, blushing when he realized how awkward the placement was. He then moved on to her blood pressure, then to her temperature.

Ray smiled, looking at the two. "Looks like you're giving her a routine physical rather than checking for a concussion."

"Right." Egon said, putting down the thermometer, then picking up a small flashlight, waving it in front of her eyes. "Are you feeling any nausea?"

"Nope. I think I would know if I had a concussion, I've had several." she laughed, awkwardly standing up. She turned to face Egon, looking down at him. "Uh, thank you, for the check up, Dr. Spengler. I'm gonna go lay down a bit."

Ray and Egon watched as she walked back into the living quarters, shutting the door quietly. Ray turned to Egon, smiling widely. "What was that all about, Dr. Spengler? When I will be receiving one of those doting examinations. You know, I remember a distinct time where Peter exhibited signs of a concussion and he didn't get this kind of treatment."

"That's because he was drunk, Raymond." Egon said, cleaning up his materials.

Ray could sense Egon was embarrassed and there was no way he was going to talk to him about Genevieve. "Well, I'm going to try to finish up the car downstairs, you alright up here?"

"Yes, I'll be fine." Egon said, walking back into the lab.

He sighed deeply. Why is everyone catching onto his stupid, schoolboy crush? That's twice in one day that he was called out for showing too much public affection for Genevieve. It's funny to think how he and Genevieve started out, his past self would be shaking his head at Egon's romantic feelings for Genevieve. When they first met five years ago, he immediately felt nothing for her. Sure, he always saw that she was physically attractive, but he didn't fully fall in love with all of her until the next year. She was shy and reserved when she began assisting him, but she was always kind to him. While others would dismiss his weird comments and ignore him when he info-dumped, she always paid attention and showed interest in what he was explaining. That was the first spark for him. Then the extra time she would spend organizing his files was another spark. The two coffees she picked up every morning for the two to share before his morning lectures. Another spark. The scarf she knitted and gifted him when winter hit. Full fire.

Who wouldn't fall for a woman like Genevieve? She captivated almost every man she met. And yet, she rejected each one. It gave Egon this silent hope that there was some attraction she had for him as well. She wasn't slick when she stared at him, he always caught her out of the corner of his eye. Maybe the root of all the teasing from their friends came from the frustration that they both like each other and are not actively trying to do anything about it.

Egon shook his head, trying to erase the thoughts from his brain, instead, turning his attention to perfecting the equipment he built for their business. After all, they had their first client, they would need proper tools soon. He tinkered for a while. Then, once he finished, he left the lab, grabbing his copy of Tobin's Spirit Guide and sat at the dining table, eagerly scouring the book for any trace of the word that Dana Barrett had mentioned earlier, Zuul.

It was dark when Peter returned. In his hands he held two large bags of Chinese food and a 6-pack of soda. He placed them on the table loudly, making Egon put down his book. Peter looked over his shoulders, shouting, "Chow time, boys! Get it while it's hot."

He sat himself down, tearing apart one of the white bags, grabbing a take-out box and chopsticks. He ate loudly as he waited for the other two to join them. Ray comes upstairs shortly after, his gray sweatshirt covered in oil stains. He seemed pleased, so they assumed his work on the car was successful. Ray and Peter ate in silence, the occasional conversation springing up and then dying soon after.

About ten minutes later, Genevieve emerged from the bedroom. Her ponytail was now messy and barely held together, and she switched her overalls for gray sweats and a white tank top. She sat next to Egon, opening the other bag of food, handing him a box and chopsticks, silently telling him to eat. He smiled to himself as he picked up the box, quickly digging in. She ate very slowly, her head resting on her hand, and her eyes barely staying open.

Peter spoke with food in his mouth, "I'm gonna need to borrow some of that petty cash. We should take her out, we don't want to lose her." he said, referring to Dana.

"This magnificent feast", Ray said, motioning to the take-out, "Is the last of the petty cash."

Egon looked over at Genevieve, who was on the verge of falling asleep again. He took the chopsticks out her hand and she opened her eyes slightly and then leaned on his shoulder. Ray and Peter smirked at Egon, silently praising him as they continued eating.

From downstairs, they could hear the phone ring and Janine answer it. Ray's ears perked as he heard Janine's growing excitement in her voice. She yelled, "We got one!" and pushed a button that set off the firehouse's alarm. Genevieve's head snapped up and she looked to Ray.

"A call!" he said, leaping up, repeating the phrase as he slid down the firepole.

Peter followed, chopsticks in his mouth and carrying his takeout box. Egon helped Genevieve stand up, and watched her slide down the pole, following soon after. The four quickly got dressed into their work uniforms, beige coveralls that had name tags with their respected names on it. The coveralls were fitted with elbow and knee pads, patches with their company photo, and a tube that would allow them to use the bathroom in their suit without peeing their pants. That idea was a joke from Peter that Ray took too seriously.

Genevieve rushed to the car, but admired Ray's handiwork for a moment before piling into the back with Egon. Ray drove the car out of the firehouse to their first real ghost site, The Sedgewick Hotel.

[tsarisfanfiction]

Dolphin Watching

Fandom: Thunderbirds Rating: Gen Genre: Family Characters: Scott, Gordon

So this is a response to @flashfictionfridayofficial and their weekly prompt “sunny delight”.  This one clocks in at 994 words, according to MSWord.

I skipped last week, I know, but I’m back - and for once, my FFF entry seems to actually be fluffy!  When’s the last time I wrote some pure fluff..?  Been a little while.  Still, here’s some wee!Military Bros.

“Scotty!”

The teenager had all of half a second’s warning before a dripping blond head barrelled into his bare chest, getting his skin wet in the process.  Arms wrapped around him tightly enough to force the breath from his lungs as he took a steadying step backwards.

“Easy,” he laughed, putting his unoccupied hand on a small shoulder and coaxing his younger brother to let go.  “What’s the rush?”

Amber eyes peaked out from underneath water-mussed hair, glittering with excitement as Gordon stepped back. He was bouncing where he stood, too much energy to possibly be contained within his tiny body.

“You’ve been gone ages,” his brother accused him, but any attempts at a pout were ruined by the wide grin he couldn’t contain.

“I was gone half an hour,” Scott corrected, ruffling the wet hair fondly.  “I thought that was only ‘ages’ in Alan-speak these days.”

Gordon shrugged off the tease, bouncing even higher.  “There are dolphins, Scotty!”  Small, also-wet hands, grabbed his empty one and yanked at him impatiently.  Smiling fondly, Scott let his younger brother drag him across the sandy beach towards the water’s edge, only putting his heels in when they reached the rest of the family.

“Give me a moment,” he told Gordon, towing the blond over to where John was sheltering under a parasol with a book.  “Save some for me,” he warned, passing over the reason he’d left the beach in the first place.

“You’d better be quick, then,” John commented, but dutifully stashed them with him in the shade.  The ice pops had been Dad’s idea, but Alan had demanded all of their father’s attention, leaving Scott to make the run.  The youngest three hadn’t been told about the planned treat, but where Virgil or Alan would have dived straight in, it seemed that Gordon was still more interested in a more literal diving so spoiling the surprise for him wasn’t much of a problem.

Well aware that he was about to be dragged into the ocean himself, Scott also dropped his wallet into John’s care and kicked off his sandals before giving in to the demands of the blond still holding his hand captive.

“They’ll be gone, Scott!” Gordon insisted.  “Come on!”

“I’m coming, fish,” Scott promised.  “Lead the way.”

He was almost pulled over by the energetic child, and narrowly avoided a face-full of sand by utilising forwards momentum and enough speed to keep his feet underneath him.  The water’s edge wasn’t far from where John was sat, and they sped past both Virgil, perched on a protruding rock with sketchbook in hand, and then Alan and Dad, who were splashing around in the shallows.

“Don’t go too deep, boys!” Dad called out as they passed, and Scott made a noise of acknowledgement even as he was yanked into the waves by his brother.

Gordon might be eight years younger than him, but he was already at least as strong a swimmer as Scott. There was no hesitation in his strokes as he quickly left his depth and struck out, leaving Scott to follow on behind. The water was calm, waves barely higher than the natural swell of the shimmering ocean, but he kept half an eye on it anyway, just in case.

There was a reason Gordon wasn’t allowed to go far by himself, even if he was a powerful swimmer.

“There!”  His brother stopped, treading water with such ease he might as well have been standing still on land.  Scott pulled up next to him and followed the pointing finger just in time to see the promised dolphin leap out of the water.

Promised dolphins, that should have been, because it was quickly followed by another, and then another, and then what had to be an entire pod of them playing around, just out of reach of swimmers from the shore.

“Dolphins!” his brother repeated, breathlessly.  Scott understood his awe – Gordon had only ever seen dolphins on television or in aquariums.  He’d never seen them in the wild.

Nor had Scott.

“Dolphins,” he agreed, watching with wide eyes as one leaped higher than the others, before seamlessly darting back under the surface.  Beside him, Gordon gasped.

“They’re beautiful,” his brother whispered.  “Aren’t they, Scotty?”

“They are, fish,” he murmured, glancing across at his captivated brother for a split second before finding his own attention caught by the creatures as well.

Together, they watched the pod race through the waves, up and down and around playfully.  Silver-blue bodies flickered in the sunlight, a sunny delight to behold.

Scott could have watched them for hours.  Gordon wanted to, if he knew his brother at all.  Unfortunately, treading water was tiring, even for a nine year old with seemingly unlimited energy, let alone his less-water-inclined big brother, and after a few minutes Scott began to feel the early warning burn in his legs.

“Say bye to the dolphins, Gordon,” he coaxed.  “We’ve got to get back to the shallows.”  If he said shore, he’d never get his brother away.

“Just a little longer?” his brother wheedled, eyes never leaving the playing dolphins.  “Please, Scotty?”

“I’d love to,” Scott admitted, “but I can’t tread water much longer and we’re too far out for me if I cramp.”

Gordon whined, but water safety had been well and truly drummed into his little brother by his swimming coaches.

“You need to practice more,” he complained.  Still, he obediently waved at the dolphins.  “Bye, dolphins!  I’ll see you again, I promise!”  The creatures didn’t respond, had never appeared to notice them at all, but it seemed to satisfy Gordon, who turned away and headed back to shore.

Scott followed, feeling a little bad that he’d had to cut Gordon’s fun short and already prepared to be dragged swimming once they got home to up his endurance.

In the meantime, he had an ice pop or few waiting for him – as long as John hadn’t let the vultures in already.

[sergeantsporks]

Can You Die of a Broken Heart?

Teen

Gen

When Nari said "the order will rip your soul to pieces," Douxie thought she meant literally. Turns out, they can do it figuratively AND literally.

Ao3

Series: I Can Make RotT So Much Worse

Based on this post by @spellcasterdouxie

“Why don’t we try to get a little information out of him, first?”

Douxie’s head jerked up. He couldn’t betray his friends—but if they were interrogating him, it meant they wouldn’t have Nari for just that much longer.

Bellroc rolled their eyes. “What information could he possibly have?”

Skrael shrugged. “A secret weapon? An idea left behind by Merlin? I think we should take a look around inside of that stupid, stupid head of his. Since he’s around, anyway.” His hands glowed with magic. “You made a mistake, wizard. You put your soul in the body of another. That makes it… vulnerable. Exposed.”

Magic pulsed out of Skrael’s hand, striking Douxie’s head. At first, it seemed like nothing had happened. Then hundreds and hundreds of glowing strands erupted from his head, stretching out.

Bellroc’s eyes seemed to light with a cruel glow. “Memories…” they hissed, reaching out.

When their hand touched a glowing strand, it erupted into a scene Douxie knew well—a lecture from Merlin. Over something he’d broken, of course.

“Useless,” Bellroc growled. They seized the glowing thread, and with a flick of their wrist, it snapped off.

Douxie felt a tug in his gut, and an overwhelming feeling of something being… missing. He’d just seen the memory—and he knew there was something that he’d remembered before, but it was gone, and no matter how he tried, he couldn’t find it.

The order tore through memories like a wildfire, pulling up and discarding them. Planning the subway trap with the other guardians of arcadia—gone. Krel’s designs for the amulet—Bellroc and Skrael watched for a bit, then ripped those away, too. The empty pit in Douxie’s stomach grew wider and wider, and the missing memories left him with a spinning head. It didn’t hurt, per se, it was just… disorienting. He knew he should feel upset—but it was hard to feel upset over losing something you didn’t remember having.

“Remember when I told you magic is mastery over life?”

Douxie lifted his head. “N-no,” he gasped, trying to pull back, “That’s—that’s—don’t—please—”

“My, Hisirdoux, what a life you’ve lived.”

Bellroc grabbed one of his horns and yanked him up. “What a pathetic life you’ve lived.”

“What a wizard you’ve become.”

“P-please—”

Skrael seemed to take special delight in ripping that one away.

“N—” Douxie’s heart hurt, but he didn’t know why, he just knew that he’d lost something, something important to him.

“A wizard does not make mistakes. He makes unexpected—”

Douxie screamed as the Order ripped through memories, until he wasn’t sure why they were important anymore.

A gentle purr—nothing but stone.

Smiles and laughs—a circular room

Moments with his student—train tracks and darkness.

A being made of ice tilted his head up, sharp claws tracing his face but not breaking skin. “Have you ever heard the Egyptian’s theory on the soul? They believed it was made of several parts. One was the ren—the name. But it was more than the name—it was memories.”

His head was spinning, and spinning, and he couldn’t remember anything but this room of stone and darkness. He managed a guttural moan—he wanted someone, needed someone so badly it hurt, but he couldn’t remember who—

The ice being jerked on one of his horns. “Your memories are an important part of you, wizard.”

Wizard? What…?

“Experience makes you who you are—without your memories, you’re just a sad, sad husk.”

A fire being spat. “Enough. We have spent long enough on this creature. Return it to its body. Without its memories, it would not even know to attack us.”

“I’d rather not take the risk.” The ice being leaned back. “When you see its soul…”

“We’ll get Nari back. But he… he will not go home.”

What… he was too tired, too sick, too lonely to figure out what they were talking about.

And then the two beings started chanting, and the world dissolved into pain, soul-crushing pain.

At least, he’d thought it was soul-crushing. Until he felt himself tearing out of his body, and the ice and fire being grabbed hold of his soul and pulled.

Turned out, there was a feeling worse than soul-crushing.

Soul ripping.

They tore at his being, and even though he was out of a body, he somehow still felt it, in every fiber of his being, that horrible, horrible tearing sensation, like taffy that had been pulled just a little too far.

Some instinct, some nagging voice in the back of his head screamed at him to end it! End the spell now, before they destroy you!

And he didn’t know what that meant, he didn’t know what spell, but maybe the little voice in the back of his head took over because he was waking up in a completely new place, in a body that was different, but felt… more familiar.

“Wha—huh—I—”

“Douxie!” A cat barreled into him, and he instinctively hugged it. It just felt… right, but he didn’t know why.

Some kid with scars on his face stared him meaningfully in the eye. “Douxie, do you know where they are?! Where’s the order, where do they have Nari?”

That sure was a lot of words that probably meant something. He shook his head. “I—I’m sorry—I really am—but—who’s Douxie?”

Xxx

“I can lock onto Nari. We’ll get her.”

Jim glanced back at the vacant Douxie, who was patting Archie, apparently with no clue of who he was. “We might need his magic.”

“We can’t take him along like this! It would be murder!” Claire twisted around to look at him, shaking his head. “Besides, I… I don’t know if he remembers how to do magic. Jim, what if we lost him?!”

Jim brushed her cheek with one hand. “Hey… look at me. Look at me. If there’s one thing I’ve learned about Douxie, it’s that he always finds a way to come back. He died, remember? And he still came back to us. He’ll get better.”

“He doesn’t remember who he is, who we are! What if he can’t come back?!”

“Then we’ll find a way to bring him back. We’ll find a spell, or Krel will be able to invent something—we won’t leave him like this. I promise.”

Xxx

Douxie—apparently that was his name. That’s what they kept telling him. He didn’t know. All he knew was the last hour of his life—the last horrible, painful hour of his life.

He hadn’t known it was so bad—not until he came here, where there was light, and everything was soft and kind, instead of harsh and painful.

And there was Archie, the cat.

Jim and Claire approached. “We’re heading out,” Jim said quietly to Archie.

Archie jumped up with a hiss. “Douxie’s not going. He needs to recover.”

“We weren’t planning on it,” Claire soothed, “No taking Douxie into dangerous situations right now. Promise.”

Archie leapt into Douxie’s lap. “I’m staying with him.”

“But what if we need—”

“Douxie needs me more. Go.”

Claire and Jim exchanged a glance, then left without a word. Archie snuggled down further in Douxie’s lap. Douxie absentmindedly stroked the cat. “Who’s your owner?”

“I don’t have one.”

“Then… who takes care of you?”

Archie gave him a look that was just so deeply sad it made Douxie want to cry, although he wasn’t sure why. “I… have a friend. My familiar.”

Douxie settled back, petting him. “What happened to him? Why isn’t he here?”

Archie started to shake a little bit. “He… didn’t come back from a fight.”

Douxie gave the cat a little squeeze. “I’m sorry.” They sat in silence, then, “Tell me about him?”

And Archie did.

He told Douxie about a wizard. About all of the adventures they’d shared. All of the hardships they’d endured—but all of the good times they’d had, too. He told him about a strict master who’d eventually given his own life for his apprentice. About how his familiar had taught Claire magic. How he’d saved the world, at the cost of his own life—then had come back from the dead.

He told him about how strong the wizard was. How brave. How kind. How clever, even if sometimes his “cleverness” backfired in his face.

Douxie’s heart ached for the cat and his familiar. It was obvious how much Archie had loved his wizard—and he’d lost him. Would have to live without him. “I’m sorry,” he said again, “He sounded…”

Archie buried himself in Douxie’s jacket. “Yes. I have to believe…”

“Believe what?”

“I have to believe that he’ll come back.” Archie twisted out, his eyes desperately searching Douxie’s. “That you’ll come back.”

An eerie sense of familiarity swept over him, the worst déjà vu.

Those stories.

They were… his stories?

He was the wizard?

What had the order done to him?!

Tears for his lost life sprang up in his eyes, and he hugged Archie, mind whirling in a thousand directions at once. It was like the Order was shredding his soul all over again—he’d had a whole life, 900 years of it, and it had been taken away. He didn’t know who he was—the only thing he had was stories of who he’d used to be, echoes of friendships he used to have. And now? What was he supposed to do?

“Douxie?” Archie asked quietly.

“I want to be him. I want to be him again, I want to be your familiar, I want to be Douxie again.” He scrubbed at his eyes. “There has to be some way to get back the memories they took, please—I… I don’t want to lose you.”

Archie purred. “Memories or not, you will always be my familiar. Nothing will change that. You won’t lose me.” He tilted his head at Douxie. “I know the world might be ending soon and all, but… how would you feel about going on a different adventure?”

“What?”

“I don’t know if we can get your memories back, Douxie. But we can certainly make new ones.”

[forestwhisper3]

                       =========================

It was all I could do to keep myself from gaping.

Gen, or Riley (and the sheer disbelief I felt at this couldn't be emphasized enough), didn't look that much older than I was, which was probably the most surreal part. When Ash had met him in the anime there had been a pretty big age difference, but...Ash was still a kid. For Riley to be close to our ages right now should have meant that Ash would have to have been well past ten when they'd first met in the show.

Yeah, I knew it was a decision made by the producers in order to keep it geared towards children, but now that I was here- or more that now that I was here and I knew none of us would be ten forever -It suddenly hit me just how much things were going to change with an older Ash going to those regions.

Hoo, boy...

All of this sort of passed through my mind in the time it took Riley to turn to me, curiosity plain as day on his face.

"Can you really understand him?"

"Y-Yeah."

"Hmm..."

I jerked back in surprise when he suddenly stepped forward and put a hand on my head. "Hey! What're you-"

"I knew it. You have Aura."

I had what now?!

He must have seen my utter shock and mistaken it for confusion, because he stepped back and smiled. "Aura. It's a latent power that all humans have, but the amount varies and not many people train it to where they can...uh..."

He paused and seemed to really notice what he was saying- and probably the fact that he was saying it to who he probably thought was a normal six-year-old girl.

"It's...kind of like a pokemon move," he amended, somewhat awkwardly. "Only we can use it too, and if you have enough, you can use it to talk to certain pokemon, like Riolu and Lucario."

I...was starting to get the feeling that kid Riley didn't have a lot of children his own age to hang out with.

I suppose it was lucky for him that I wasn't a typical little girl then.

"Actually...that's not why I can understand him."

He blinked in confusion. "What?

I fidgeted, wondering if I should really be admitting this when I'd literally only just told my family earlier today. Then again, this was Riley, who- despite being the slightly awkward duck he was at the moment -would grow up to be pretty much a modern-day knight in all but name. I could trust him, right? I was pretty sure I could.

Besides, I really wanted to hear more about aura- and the fact that I had it.

"Well...I can understand all pokemon. Not just aura using ones," I clarified.

His eyes widened. "How?"

"The pokemon in the forest near my home taught me," I explained, pointedly not mentioning the fact that I'd had to repeatedly sneak away for them to do so. "I asked them to."

"You...asked them to?"

"They were surprisingly agreeable about it."

Riley gave a sort of pause, then turned to look at Riolu, who only gave a sort of half shrug and nodded.

"You'd be surprised at how many humans don't think to do that," he said. "To be fair, it depends a lot on the kind of person who asks, but if we think they're alright then we don't have a problem with it."

"And you didn't tell me this before why?"

"Because you didn't ask."

Riley gave Riolu the stink eye, and the action was so unexpected that drew a laugh out of me.

Of course, that was more or less when Stoutland came barreling into the courtyard we were in, hackles raised and snarl fully in place as he came to a stop between me and Riolu.

"Were it not for your kind's noble history as well as the fact that you are still a pup yourself, I would have already attacked without hesitation or regret. Now, young aura wielder, tell me why you thought it was a good idea to take off with a member of my pack without warning?"

[cocomaxley]

Love and Loss

@ao719 and I wrote this little drabble for @neotericthemis's birthday!

Sri, you and your reblogs are the best!! We wish you the happiest of birthdays!

xoxo,

Anitah and Gen 💜🖤💜🖤

Summary: Zoey Day suffers a loss and her loved ones do their best to comfort her.

It was a dark, gloomy day, matching the mood of the group of people gathered around the freshly dug earth. Thomas wrapped his arms around Zoey, trying to comfort her as she quietly sobbed. This was a side of his stepdaughter that he didn’t often see. She was a happy girl that could only see the good in any situation.

Luz sat next to her sister; she looked around at the gathered faces, seeing them all look sadly at Zoey. I don’t understand. It was a fish. A goldfish. I eat cracker versions of them. Honestly, I’m surprised it lived this long. It had a long life for a goldfish. She glanced next to her at Zoey who had a tear running down her cheek. She musta’ been really attached to little Nemo ... I think that was his name. I can try to win her another one at the carnival next week. They give goldfish out like candy at those things. I wonder what they do with all the extra ones... Although she didn’t quite get the whole funeral for a fish, Luz placed a hand on her sister’s shoulder and squeezed it, reminding her that she wasn’t alone.

Zoey wiped her eyes before addressing everyone. “I’d just like to thank you all for being here today. To say that my heart is broken doesn’t even come close to what I’m feeling. But having all of you here, supporting me, it has helped me get through this really difficult time.”

Zoey tried to keep her composure as she knelt down and threw a flower into the grave. “I’ll miss you...so much.”

Zoey burst into tears once again; everyone around her murmured soft words of encouragement and condolences. She wasn’t sure how long she was sitting on the grass. Her clothes were wet, but she didn’t care. Thomas knelt down next to her. “Zoey, let’s go, honey. We will come back tomorrow, ok?”

The group made their way towards the Mendez-Day home. Levi leaned towards Alma and whispered, “Why are we attending a gold fish’s funeral? And why did I think it was a good idea to wear my only suit for this?”

Alma shushed him, trying her hardest to stop from laughing. “No one told you to wear the suit. You made that big boy decision all by yourself.”

Before they could open the door, Luz came barreling out onto the porch yelling, “GUESS WHAT, ZOE? DAD SAID WE COULD GET A PUPPY!”

Thomas looked at his daughter in shock. “No, I didn-”

He stopped midway through his sentence looking at his stepdaughter’s hopeful eyes and melted. “I sure did say that…”

Tara was standing at the doorway as Luz skipped up to her and gave her a high five. Everyone heard Tara snort before she burst into laughter. “Sucker.”

******

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[nellie-elizabeth]

Queliot Fic Recs - Master Post (March 11, 2020)

Hi everyone! I’ve been meaning to do this for a while, but now that we’re staring down the barrel of the show’s official ending, I thought I’d finally take the time to post a master fic rec list!

A couple of notes:

This is by no means comprehensive; I’m sure I’m forgetting several lovely fics, and will be updating this list as I remember/find more.

This list will not include WIPs (the only exception being where I rec a completed story that is part of a series, and mention that sequel(s) are still in progress). I will add the WIPs I’m reading once they are complete!

I am open to suggestions from others, so please reblog and add your own recommendations! I would love to add to this and make it a one-stop-shop resource for people looking for something new to read.

When I know the tumblr handle of the author, I have included it. But in several cases I don’t know the author’s tumblr, if they have one - if you have this information to fill in, please let me know and I will update the master post. (Also, if you notice any broken links or mistakes - I did my best, but this thing is hefty and I’m sure there are errors!)

This took me… forever to put together, so if you find it useful, please reblog - and more importantly, please leave comments & kudos on the stories you read!

Link to the Google Doc, if that’s easier for you to read.

https://docs.google.com/document/d/1sIUMZcIcpnZ1_9T3o7dkqUaqEw0miwNTfTuZjvjGto4/edit?usp=sharing

Hefty rec list under the cut.

Season Three Gapfillers/Deviations from Canon

These stories usually deal with the aftermath of the mosaic in some way. Many of them were written before the revelations of 4x05, but some were written later, and either comply with canon, or deviate from it from that point.

shipping it by Mizzy (@mizzy2k). Mature. 16,344 words. The Muntjac “ships” Queliot and is trying to help them along. What else can I say? There’s angst, there’s love, it’s silly and it’s sincere.

Sense Memories by mtothedestiel (@summersteve). Explicit. 2,616 words. This is an ABO fic, which is not something I would typically read. But I love this author so much that I decided to give it a try. The thing I like about it is the idea of the mosaic timeline leaving a tangible, physical impact on Quentin and Eliot, and how they might deal with the fallout in this more extreme scenario. If ABO isn’t for you, though, proceed with caution.

throw your shadow over me by peacefrog (@lizardkingeliot). Explicit. 8,187 words. Okay I’m going to recommend basically everything peacefrog has written, but this one is probably my favorite. It’s a super angst-y sex scene between Quentin and Eliot during season three, where Eliot believes this is his last chance to be with Quentin, and is basically dreading the emotional fallout even while it’s happening.

i start spinning (slipping out of time) by peacefrog (@lizardkingeliot). Teen. 2,570 words. Before Eliot goes to Margo to discuss the god-killing bullet, he and Quentin have a conversation about Quentin’s choice to stay at Blackspire. Features a heartbreaking memory of their life together at the mosaic, and just generally gorgeous canon-compliant angst.

Promises by Rizandace (@Nellie-Elizabeth). Explicit. 7,751 words. Eliot and Quentin have it out about Quentin’s decision to stay in Blackspire, and hash out their feelings for each other. This one is canon-divergent (and is probably the one-shot I am the most proud of!)

Overthinking It by Rizandace (@Nellie-Elizabeth). Teen. 3,581 words. Eliot finds out about the abyss key, and it prompts a discussion about Quentin and Eliot’s relationship.

Honey You’re On Fire, Let Me Help by sirfoxheart (@sirfoxheart). Explicit. 5,857 words. Quentin accidentally picks up the abyss key… Eliot finds him and does what he can to distract him. This is hot, of course, but also so desperately full of feeling and love. As the summary implies, there is a good deal of depression and talk of suicide in this story, so take care.

Can’t Let Go by sirfoxheart (@sirfoxheart). Explicit. 5,384 words. UGH. This is what SHOULD have happened after Eliot and Quentin remember the mosaic time-line. This is so satisfying and gave me some catharsis in the aftermath of the direction the story has taken in canon.

~~~~~

Post-Season Four Fix-Its

These stories maintain the canon of season four, and continue on from there. They generally involve bringing Quentin back from the dead.

What Matter Where by achray. Explicit. 28,782 words. Eliot becomes Prince Consort of the Underworld. He gets to be with Q when he’s back home, though. This is almost tough to read, because my brain doesn’t want to accept any half-happy endings, any reality where Eliot can’t spend all of his time by Quentin’s side. But on the other hand… Eliot has to make a big, big sacrifice to bring Quentin back, and you definitely feel the gravitas of that.

life ain’t fair (so i guess we’d better cheat) by micksgotkicks (@lovelyquentin). Teen. 1,137 words. This is more of a pre-fix-it. Eliot rages against the heavens for taking Quentin from him, and resolves to get him back. Short and painful. Cathartic.

Being Alive by miss_whimsy (@bambiesque). Gen. 7,022 words. Eliot sends the letter to Quentin with the magical stamp. And when that doesn’t work, he sends a bunch more. This is one of the very few fics on this list that has any connection to season five canon, which I’m not watching. I did watch 5x03, however, and this fic is borne out of Eliot Waugh never giving up - the way we all know it should have gone.

What kind of man (loves like this)? by destielpasta (@queliotpasta). Explicit. 3,160 words. Eliot and Quentin go out dancing. This fic has a certain quality about it that’s difficult to describe - I could just really feel their love for each other jump off the page, specifically in how badly they clearly want to care for each other. This fic also straddles the line between categories - the author describes it as a “fix-it” and it does deal with Quentin’s resurrection in a more immediate way, but the subject matter itself is much more about the aftermath, rather than the actual “bringing Q back from the dead” part.

You’re a Story (I Can Follow) by Page161of180. Mature. 19,695 words. I think everyone’s read this, but how could I not include it? This technically isn’t a fix-it, because it was written before the season four finale confirmed the theory of Quentin’s death. This author, like the collective fandom, assumed that death would be temporary… and thus, this is the story of Eliot being the Orpheus to Quentin’s Eurydice. It is stunning - a gold standard in writing intense grief with a happy ending. Eliot is undone by Quentin’s death here, and has to fight through obstacle after obstacle to get him back - the biggest one being, his own lack of self-worth. There’s also a somewhat-connected sequel/prequel called And Remember What You Were Before (Not Rated, 6,998 words), which is completely worth the read.

(like a perfect picture) in a broken frame by PanBoleyn (@eidetictelekinetic). Not Rated. 20,631 words. Another resurrection/fix-it fic… Really great group dynamics as everyone works on bringing Quentin back, but also a focus on Eliot’s despair. Kind of your standard fix-it, exactly what the characters should have tried to do, in a world where canon hadn’t betrayed us so badly.

life fades (but you remain) by peacefrog (@lizardkingeliot). Explicit. 62,735. Stunning. STUNNING. Eliot finds a way to get Quentin back, but it comes at a cost. The two of them have to work it out. This features some incredibly good angst with a happy ending, scorching sex, a really intriguing OC in an early chapter, and some nice screen-time for the lovely Alice Quinn, to boot.

as it was by peacefrog (@lizardkingeliot). Mature. 3,913 words. Short and sweet - Penny-40 leads Quentin to where he needs to go, and that’s back home to Eliot.

In the Woods Somewhere by pineapplecrushface (@pineapplecrushface). Explicit. 15,528 words. This is the most creative take on a fix-it I’ve seen! The summary outlines the premise best: “Alice being unable to wipe younger Quentin's memory during the timeshare spell had a ripple effect.” Eliot is so desperate for Quentin in this one, and Quentin, from the afterlife, is having to work out how he feels and where he wants to be.

In Which We Grieve by portraitofemmy (@portraitofemmy). Teen. 3,413 words. I hesitate to call this a “fix-it” really, since Quentin doesn’t come back to life. But despite that, he and Eliot make it work. This is sad, but cathartic too.

(this is not a) Temporary Love by rizcriz (@sadlittlenerdking). Teen. 20,684 words. A fix-it that includes some intense mosaic feels too, as Margo and Eliot read over some letters/notes written during the mosaic timeline. I also like this one for how the rest of the gang finally notices how sick and worn-down Quentin is, and forces Q and Eliot to take a mental health vacation once Quentin is back in the land of the living!

~~~~~

Post-Season Four/Post-Possession - Not Fix-Its

These stories take place after the events of season four, or, in some cases, after an imagined ending of season four (written before the series finale aired), ignoring season five canon. They are not fix-its in the sense that either a) they ignore Quentin’s death in canon and proceed like it never happened, or b) Quentin’s resurrection happened “off-screen” and is not the focus of the story. These fics often deal with the aftermath, both physical and psychological, of Eliot’s possession. They also usually deal with Quentin and Eliot’s reconciliation after the events of seasons three and four, and sometimes continue through their time as an established couple.

your body (your heart) in his hands by Allegria23 (@allegria23). Explicit. 18,636 words. This fic follows Eliot and Quentin into their future. I’m recommending it specifically for the way it deals with Quentin’s discipline - I’ve never seen a fic tackle the subject in quite this way, and with so much care and gentleness. If you are not a fan of kid!fic, don’t be put off by the premise - Eliot and Quentin are great fathers with amazing kids in this future universe, but the focus really does remain on their romance. This story is part of a series called second time around which is all worth a read, especially the latest part, entitled The Special Dish. The whole series really embodies the romance of effort, and how putting in the time to nurture and grow a relationship is what makes it work.

Be still my foolish heart (i’m almost me again) by Butterfly (@butterflydm). Explicit. 3,754 words. A birthday fic for Quentin - he’s a little overwhelmed by the party held in his honor. He sneaks off to be alone, Eliot follows him, and Q tells Eliot about his discipline.

Living Room, NY by cartographies (@honeybabydichotomy). Teen. 11,254 words. Eliot goes to therapy. I’m recc’ing this specifically for Eliot’s rambling confession of love to Quentin in chapter two. The whole thing is lovely, but that part really knocked me the fuck out.

Imagine being loved by me. by destielpasta (@queliotpasta). Explicit. 11,225 words. Holy moly. This is a top-tier fave for me. It’s about sex, it’s about love, it’s about working through a relationship after trauma. Eliot is touch-starved but can’t be touched - so Quentin and Eliot must get creative.

Yes and Yes and Maybe Yes by hetrez (@hetrez). Mature. 5,542 words. The author describes this as “consent porn, with feelings,” and that’s a pretty good descriptor. Quentin has PTSD because of the Monster, and Eliot’s touch can be triggering for him. They work together to get through it. This is hot, yes, but it’s hot specifically because of how badly Eliot wants to take care of Quentin and make him feel safe.

The Dreamers by hetrez (@hetrez). Teen. 10,143 words. Post-possession, Quentin and Eliot are together but things aren’t smooth sailing. The scene from this story that always sticks in my head is Quentin asking Eliot if he wants to have a family again, like they did before with Arielle and Teddy - and Eliot’s horrifically wrong-footed response: “You’ll get a wife again and we’ll have another baby.” As might be predicted, Quentin doesn’t take that very well… and this story is at least partially working out where they stand, what they both want.

The Drum Beats Out of Time by HMGFanfic (@hmgfanfic). Mature. 68,605 words. This series features two stories: Suitcase of Memories and I Fall Behind. Both are amazing, but I Fall Behind in particular is one of my top-tier favorite fics in the whole fandom. This fic does not pull its punches in terms of the effects of Eliot’s possession, and it makes things really rough for Quentin and Eliot’s relationship. Quentin does a reckless thing, Eliot panics, they hash it out - but it’s not easy, and it’s not so clear-cut. These fics also features glimpses of their life together at the mosaic, and a lovely epilogue that shows how they’ve made progress and are still healing as a couple.

the right time and place by impossibletruths (@impossibletruths). Teen. 3,675 words. Eliot trying to propose to Quentin. It’s sweet and fluffy and good for the soul.

hearts like houses by impossibletruths (@impossibletruths). Explicit. 11,888 words. Quentin and Eliot celebrate Eliot’s birthday, post-possession. They get away for a trip, to try and put their worries behind them. This story is full of so much intimacy and gentleness that it just melts my whole heart.

five times my writing was better than the magicians by micksgotkicks (@lovelyquentin). Teen. 6,019 words. These are just… soft. It’s five different short fics, all with slight variations on the simple concept of Quentin and Eliot reuniting post-possession. There’s no intensive deep-dive, nothing too grim or challenging. It’s just the two of them finding their way to each other again and again. Very healing to read, in light of canon’s (inferior) version of reality.

struck from a great height by mtothedestiel (@summersteve). Explicit. 4,517 words. “Life affirming sex” is the most telling tag on this thing. Post-possession, Eliot and Quentin find their way into each other’s arms. Really hot sex, lots of feelings… everything we deserved at the end of the Monster story-line.

And So Lift Your Spirits by OrchardsinSnow (@orchardsinsnow). Explicit. 3,437 words. This was one of the first fics I remember reading in the aftermath of my desperate post-season four feelings, and it hit the spot in the best way. Eliot’s POV - he loves Quentin, but has doubts that he’s actually deserving of something so wonderful, that Quentin could really reciprocate and want to stay. Quentin finds an insanely hot, insanely romantic way to reassure him.

Ten Twenty-Eight by Page161of180. Not Rated. 5,974 words. This is slice-of-life about Quentin Coldwater and how he’s spent Eliot’s birthday, October 28, over the years. It’s told through notes from the Library branch of the Underworld, with added comments from Alice and Penny. It’s weird, but rewarding. I love the record-keeping aspect. This author has a real gift for outsider POV, and this is one of my favorites!

Nights and Mornings by Page161of180. Mature. 6,734 words. Two connected stories, in the aftermath of possession. Quentin doesn’t die, but he does still get back together with Alice, a la 4x12. These stories deal with Eliot’s thoughts on that, and… spoiler… Quentin/Alice is just not meant to be. Quentin makes a different choice.

The Honor of Your Presence by Page161of180. Mature. 18,117 words. Quentin and Eliot get married, and we hear the story from three different POVs… Todd, Rafe, and Marina 23. Random? Yes. Brilliant? Also yes. I love how each POV has a different and distinct literary style. And how even the people who aren’t closest to Quentin and Eliot can see how insanely in love they are with each other.

The Wanting Then, the Needing Now by Page161of180. Not rated. 3,799 words. Alice’s POV, as Eliot is saved from possession, and Quentin falls apart. Basically, Alice realizes where Quentin really belongs. I love the way this author does justice to Quentin’s love for Alice - it’s not a footnote, it’s not an insignificant blip. It’s real, and that doesn’t invalidate the fact that Quentin chooses Eliot. This has a much longer sequel which is also very good - but that story is more Alice-centric and not really focused on Queliot as much, even though they definitely play a part.

Lay Me Down (Pockets Full of Stones) by PanBoleyn (@eidetictelekinetic). Not Rated. 10,024 words. Post-possession, Eliot realizes how badly Quentin has been dealing with things. He’s angry at their friends for not keeping a better eye out - but all that matters right now is finding Quentin and making sure he’s alright. I love this story for how messy their reunion is - how all of their feelings just come spilling out of them without finesse.

(one kiss) it all comes down to this by PanBoleyn (@eidetictelekinetic). Not Rated. 6,391 words. True Love’s Kiss… the boys need to talk about their feelings, and a curse forces the issue. This is so entirely my jam.

box of chocolates by peacefrog (@lizardkingeliot). Mature. 9,256 words. This short series begins with the Teen-rated for love (if it finds you worthy) and features Eliot asking Quentin to be his valentine. Because Quentin and Eliot are… Quentin and Eliot, it still takes them a little while to get their shit together, after that.

when lips and skin remember by peacefrog (@lizardkingeliot). Explicit. 6,163 words. This is for the monthly prompt challenge - “blindfolds” and features Quentin helping Eliot through some sensory issues, post-Monster possession.

an end (but the start of all things that are left to do) by peacefrog (@lizardkingeliot). Explicit. 2,388 words. Birthday smut! Q is alive and gets a blowjob, as the universe requires.

the one with the dog by portraitofemmy (@portraitofemmy). Explicit. 80,517 words. If you haven’t already read this series, what are you waiting for?? It is IDEAL for soothing the soul. Eliot and Quentin deal with the aftermath of their trauma, both physical and mental. They hang out at the condo in New York, they take care of an adorable dog named Lady Desdemona, they have lots of hot sex of course. They heal. Every single one of the twelve stories in this series is worth reading, but my favorites are probably (this is) the beat of my heart (Explicit, 11,700 words), Five Card Draw (Explicit, 3,531 words), all the way home I’ll be warm (Explicit, 15,640 words), and Come What May (Teen, 3,352 words).

5 Scenes from a Road Trip by portraitofemmy (@portraitofemmy). Explicit. 16,218 words. In the aftermath of season four (sans Quentin’s death), the boys need a change of scenery to begin healing and finding their way back to one another. I love how this fic shows their closeness, and how the boundaries of their relationship often defy description. They love each other beyond sex, beyond conventional romance - although they achieve those things, too, as they definitely deserve.

did you know my baby loves me? by portraitofemmy (@portraitofemmy). Explicit. 7,776 words. Quentin tops Eliot on his birthday. What it says on the tin. But as always with this author, even something that should be ostensibly a PWP is filled with so much feeling and love that you could just drown in it.

To Learn to Be Again by portraitofemmy (@portraitofemmy). Explicit. 18,295 words. “I don’t think- I can’t be anyone’s boyfriend right now, Eliot.” Eliot loves Quentin, Quentin loves Eliot, but that’s not always enough to give them a happily ever after. Quentin goes to therapy, deals with his trauma and his mental health, and Eliot is right there beside him with no expectations. This is so, so lovely and every ounce of their happiness feels earned and all the more precious for the pain that’s mixed up with it.

do not go gentle by portraitofemmy (@portraitofemmy). Explicit. 10,260 words. This is almost a fix-it, in that Quentin imagines the events of 4x13, but they don’t actually happen. So be warned if any depiction of Quentin’s death is a trigger for you. I love the way this story deals with the Alice of it all, and also the way Quentin and Eliot talk through their situation and find a way back to each other once again. (Also shower sex happens). This author has written multiple versions of this same reconciliation, but each one is so lovely and I’ll never get sick of it.

the strange act of living by propinquitous (@propinquitous). Explicit. 13,632 words. So there are a lot of fics out there that deal with the aftermath of Eliot’s possession of course. A lot of fics that feature Eliot and Quentin slowly, painfully, finding a way to reconcile. This one holds a special place in my heart for this particular moment, where Quentin walks past Eliot without saying anything, grabs a muffin from the counter, and leaves the room. Later, Q finds Eliot crying in the shower, and Eliot asks him why he just left, taking the food Eliot had made for him, and then ignoring him. That one moment has stuck with me ever since I read the fic, and I keep coming back to it. In all, this captures a very specific kind of hurt that both Quentin and Eliot are feeling, and gets them on the path to healing. Gorgeous.

the safety of others by propinquitous (@propinquitous). Teen. 8,122 words. Quentin doesn’t die in 4x13, but he does get injured. And Eliot keeps vigil. This is - so powerful. I don’t even know how to describe it. Just read it, please.

Magic Curses by Rizandace (@Nellie-Elizabeth). Explicit. 134,886 words. This series includes six stories, each dealing with Quentin and Eliot’s relationship as they undergo external threats from creative and somewhat evil magical curses. It’s my attempt to write in some more hurt/comfort to the fandom, and also to indulge in some established-relationship goodness! The first story, Lover’s Touch (Explicit, 24,781 words), is summarized thusly: “Q gets cursed, and Alice can’t help. Magic forces Q and Eliot to cuddle and talk about their feelings.”

Coming Home by rizcriz (@sadlittlenerdking). Not Rated. 2,958 words. Short and sweet. The author succinctly describes this as: “Eliot gets to be brave.” And he does. He says the thing he wants to say to Quentin, and Q eventually believes him.

Enough by SabbyStarlight. Teen. 2,746 words. This was written just before 4x13 came out. If only if only this is how it had gone instead… basically just Quentin and Eliot talking about their feelings, negotiating their relationship.

Boyfriend by sirfoxheart (@sirfoxheart). Teen. 6,727 words. Quentin is sensitive about the fact that Eliot isn’t introducing him as his boyfriend. This is just… the sweetest. I love that there’s some jealousy and insecurity, but it’s a manageable, reasonable type - Eliot and Quentin are able to talk about it and get past this small bump in the road.

Hunger by sirfoxheart (@sirfoxheart). Explicit. 4,327 words. Quentin gets a birthday blowjob. The end. :)

~~~~~

Mosaic Timeline

These stories are ones that take place almost or entirely within the mosaic timeline - both in keeping with, and in deviation from, what we see in 3x05.

help me hold onto you by ameliajessica (@ameliajessica). Explicit. 14,768 words. This one will hurt your heart, but it’s so rewarding. Featuring Eliot being ridiculously turned on by talking about feelings during sex… and Quentin loving Eliot while grieving for Arielle.

‘Cause my baby’s sweet as can be by destielpasta (@queliotpasta). Teen. 645 words. Tiny fic - maybe the shortest one on the list. Quentin and Eliot are bad at talking about their feelings. Who’s surprised?

flowing all this time by mtothedestiel (@summersteve). Explicit. 5,488 words. This is one of those fics where Arielle isn’t an obstacle for the boys… but rather, Eliot is an obstacle for Quentin and Arielle, in a way. It has some bittersweet moments, but I love how much Eliot loves Quentin here. This is also (spoiler) the rare fic where Arielle chooses to leave, rather than dying.

a cure i know (that soothes the soul) by peacefrog (@lizardkingeliot). Explicit. 4,857 words. Little snippets of Quentin and Eliot’s life through the years at the mosaic. Recc’ing especially for middle-aged Queliot, which we see all too little of in this fandom!

measure in love by portraitofemmy (@portraitofemmy). Explicit. 51,827 words. This is a series about Quentin, Eliot, and Arielle’s lives together at the mosaic. I don’t know if the author plans to write more in this series or not, but each one can stand alone. I am particularly enamored with The Ways We Fit Together (Explicit, 11,661 words), which is summarized succinctly as “sex and love in the mosaic timeline”, and You Steer My Heart (Explicit, 25,217 words), which follows Eliot’s mindset as he watches Quentin and Arielle fall in love with each other, while Quentin and Eliot continue to love each other as well. It’s stunning, and probably my favorite take on the three of them and their polyamorous relationship. This series has everything - the best combination of smut and feelings you could hope for.

Running All This Time by Rizandace (@Nellie-Elizabeth). Explicit. 179,478 words.The story of the mosaic timeline, built on the foundation of love and communication. To my knowledge, the only completed mosaic long-fic in the fandom thus far! Includes Fillorian nonsense, a quest within a quest, plenty of sex, lots of hurt/comfort, a different take on Arielle, and happy endings for everyone.

Reciprocal by Rizandace (@Nellie-Elizabeth). Teen. 8,259. Eliot is an idiot about his feelings (what else is new?), and he tries to make things better in the worst possible way. This fic imagines a world where Eliot and Quentin find happiness together without Arielle as a part of their romantic/sexual lives.

my heart is thrilled by the still of your hand by sirfoxheart (@sirfoxheart). Explicit. 9,586 words. This is the porn-iest version of “Quentin and Eliot don’t know how to talk about their feelings.” Basically, the boys keep jerking off next to each other in bed, and they don’t talk about it because they’re IDIOTS.

you know that’s my love (bursting loud from inside) by sirfoxheart (@sirfoxheart). Explicit. 11,904 words. Another fic where Arielle decides to leave. Eliot is so good at taking care of his family.

tomorrow past tonight by vegansheilseitan. Explicit. 7,676 words. Okay - if you’re only going to read one gap-filler for 3x05, that’s basically just the missing sex scene and nothing else, make it this one. It’s hot, and it’s aching with everything Quentin and Eliot aren’t saying to each other. This is one of my absolute favorites.

~~~~~

Brakebills Alternate Universe / Season One

These stories are generally, but not always, pure relationship fics where the plot concerns of canon (i.e. the Beast, and time loops) do not exist, and instead Quentin and Eliot get to be magical grad students together, and fall in love.

Every Blessed Thing by achray. Explicit. 7,795 words. Quentin turns himself invisible. This fic is complex in how Alice and Quentin’s relationship is portrayed, and the resolution isn’t clear-cut. I really like this characterization of both Quentin and Eliot.

saturate the atmosphere (wake me from a dream) by Allegria23 (@allegria23). Explicit. 7,394 words. This is some good ol’ sexy times with a healthy dash of feelings. Eliot involuntarily levitates them while Quentin’s giving him a blowjob, so… that’s honestly all you need to know about this one. Go give it a read.

i feel it in my body, know it in my mind by ameliajessica (@ameliajessica). Mature. 11,817 words. Let’s pretend that this is what happened in 1x03, okay? Kady doesn’t interrupt when Eliot pours Q a drink, and sex ensues. I love how flabbergasted Eliot is by everything that happens - especially his reaction to the news that Quentin isn’t straight, and isn’t going to be squeamish at the thought of sleeping with a man. So hot, so cute.

if being him is who you are / say it loud say you know you are by ameliajessica (@ameliajessica). Mature. 5,293 words. Okay, holy shit. Mike’s POV - he decides that he and Eliot should have a threesome with Quentin, so Eliot can get it out of his system. Uh. Yeah, that backfires. Poor Mike. But also - the sex in this is the epitome of tenderness and love. Eliot is so careful with Quentin, so awed and desperate and shaky at the chance to be with him. There is a sequel in the works, too, so watch out for that!

Hedonism for Beginners by ceeainthereforthat (@ceeainthereforthat). Explicit. 20,730 words. A series of filthy sex, basically. Eliot is teaching Quentin about what he likes in bed. I don’t know if the series is abandoned or not, but in any case, each of these works on its own as a PWP but with a deep undercurrent of feelings.

Something Good by HMGFanfic (@hmgfanfic). Teen. 162,260 words. The Gold Standard slow-burn rom-com AU! Seriously, I know everyone’s read this, but if you haven’t for some reason… please do. The slow-burn is so slow you’ll be tearing your hair out by the end, but it’s all worth it when you get to the catharsis. How oblivious can Quentin be about Eliot’s feelings? This fic asks and answers that question, and the answer is - very. There are also two fics that accompany the main story: Someone Good (Eliot’s POV of the main story) and Somewhere Good (future one-shots of Quentin and Eliot’s life together). Both are on hiatus but the author plans to return to them. You can read the existing chapter of each without feeling like anything is unfinished, though.

Not Always Folly by HMGFanfic (@hmgfanfic). Explicit. 262,583 words. Another amazing romantic… comedy? but this one is from Eliot’s POV and is in some ways more a character study of Eliot Waugh than it is simply a romance. Although the romance… you guys… the pining levels are off the charts. Eliot ends up hurting Quentin, and really everyone else he cares about, in this story, but he puts in the work to make it right. I admire this fic for diving deep into Eliot’s psyche while also delivering on an amazing slow-burn of a different sort. Bonus points for Alice and Eliot getting to be friends like they deserve!

Be kind by longnationalnightmare. Explicit. 10,069 words. It’s the highest kudo’d fic in the fandom! I assume that means you’ve all read it? This is a PWP, but I love it specifically for how much Eliot loses his usual control when he’s with Quentin.

to be unbroken or be brave again. by milominderbinder (@disasterbiquentin). Teen. 14,135 words. Hey, it’s a 10 Things I Hate About You AU! Kind of! Josh asks Quentin to pretend to date Eliot to cheer him up after a breakup, so that Margo will go out with Josh. But Q tells Eliot what’s up right away - so they’re fake dating but real feelings happen. Super cheesy, of course, but it hits the spot!

in the world full wrong (you’re the thing that’s right) by Mizzy (@Mizzy2k). Explicit. 5,307 words. Eliot tries to hook up with Quentin Coldwater and gets more than he bargained for. I love this for how matter-of-fact Quentin is, about the fact that Eliot wants to seduce him… and then hpw he ends up doing some seducing of his own.

If You Haven’t Yet by OrchardsinSnow (@orchardsinsnow). Explicit. 5,828 words. Obviously we all love confident Eliot Waugh totally rocking Quentin’s world… but I have a soft spot for oddly confident Quentin who really knows what he’s doing, and this fic has the perfect blend of both dynamics. The best part is Quentin slowly and methodically undressing Eliot and not letting him help. It’s… whew. *fans self*

the heat that drives the light by peacefrog (@lizardkingeliot). Explicit. 9,296 words. Quentin and Eliot have an antagonistic relationship, until Eliot realizes Quentin might be what he’s looking for in a sexual partner. Sub Eliot, new-to-being-a-Dom Quentin. Super hot.

it started out with a kiss (how did it end up like this) by portraitofemmy (@portraitofemmy). Explicit. 7,896 words. In the aftermath of a bad breakup, Quentin and Eliot find their way to each other. This is super amazing all on its own, but the author is also working on a sequel that I’m really enjoying thus far. Either story could probably be read without the other, too.

the bridge between us by portraitofemmy (@portraitofemmy). Explicit. 16,201 words. Dom Eliot, Sub Quentin. Quentin and Eliot navigate their BDSM sex life, but also their feelings. Eliot is so tender and soft with Q, and Q learns to take care of Eliot in return. This is one of my absolute favorites from this author. Also, as a note, there’s a “prequel” to this fic called paint it red (Explicit, 7,197 words) that could totally be read as a separate piece, but is worth checking out as the origin story of how these two got together and started shaping their dynamics, sexual and otherwise.

(Everyone Has) That Drawer by ProofOfConcept and wilddragonflying. Explicit. 5,782 words. Eliot finds Quentin’s stash of sex toys. It’s enough to get him to finally act on their mutual, unspoken attraction. Hot!

Wake Me Up by rizcriz (@sadlittlenerdking). Not Rated. 4,000 words. Quentin has sleep apnea, but Eliot doesn’t know that… and he gets a little - alarmed. This is objectively an odd premise, but it’s incredibly sweet. rizcriz has about a million stories and I’ve read a lot of them, but I’m a fan of the ones like this, that take a specific concept and run with it, sort of like slice-of-life. Check out more of their work, though, I can’t possibly put them all on the list!

Migraine Mastery by SabbyStarlight. Not rated. 2,012 words. Short and sweet - Quentin has a migraine and Eliot helps.

Between Friends by sirfoxheart (@sirfoxheart). Explicit. 15,019 words. This is the quintessential (Quentin-sential?) Brakebills get-together fic. It’s a party, Quentin and Eliot end up going to bed together… both of them are a little uncertain about what this means, but they work it out. Recc’ing for the hot sex, but even more for the “wake up in the middle of the night to have a tender round two without talking about what it means” sex.

Sex Magic by sirfoxheart (@sirfoxheart). Explicit. 42,006 words. Uhh… what it says on the tin. Every one of these is scorching, but my favorite is probably the first one: How Easy You Are To Need.

All Of You A Verb In Perfect View by sirfoxheart (@sirfoxheart). Explicit. 6,398 words. PWP where Eliot distracts Quentin while he tries to do his homework.

You Can Devastate Me by sirfoxheart (@sirfoxheart). Explicit. 9,018 words. Marqueliot sex scene - Quentin and Eliot are a couple, but Margo is running the show. Just… hot, but of course Eliot’s love for Quentin still permeates the whole piece. So much tenderness, with so much filth.

~~~~~

Alternate Universe (No Magic)

So many of these seem so completely random in premise, but they’re all amazing!

Our Sublime Refrain by destielpasta (@queliotpasta) and mtothedestiel (@summersteve). Explicit. 233,929 words. It’s 1836, Eliot is a pianist. This one is Marqueliot, y’all, and let me tell you - it is a journey. If you are somewhat put off by the idea of an AU so far removed from canon, about a topic you know very little about… please give this a try. I was a little hesitant too, but I promise it will not disappoint.

Pretty Good Year by Hth (@spiders-hth-is-an-outlier). Explicit. 175,728 words. I’m not going to lie - this is a difficult fic for me. It’s stunning, but getting through it was an incredibly emotional, challenging journey. While many fics in this fandom deal with Quentin’s mental illness, I’ve never seen a fic talk about it quite like this one. That’s not to put you off from trying it if you haven’t already - this is one of the most achingly real stories I’ve ever read, and it will reward you for giving it a chance.

opening doors by impossibletruths (@impossibletruths). Mature. 52,230 words. Quentin is a playwright! Eliot is an associate director who used to act! This is a slow-ish burn, and the worldbuilding of the characters in a theatrical setting is so fun!

couch party verse by marcel. Mature. 33,725 words. These two stories feature Quentin, Eliot, and the rest of the gang at a non-magical grad school. The thing I love about these stories is how slow and realistic the escalation of the relationship feels. It’s not a hot hookup right away - they clearly like each other, but circumstances sometimes get in the way, and there’s also no big rush to the finish line. This is a softer, gentler universe that still has its own realism and trauma, too. I hope the author chooses to add to it someday!

Saltwater by mtothedestiel (@summersteve). Explicit. 35,560 words. It’s a pirate AU! What more could you possibly need to know? I love how all of the characters and locations are cleverly repurposed here - the Whitespire and Our Lady Underground are ships, Quentin is a ship’s doctor, Eliot is a captain, etc. And the slowburn between Quentin and Eliot is masterful. This is actually a series - part one is complete, and part two is in progress.

A (Gingerbread) House that we can Build by mtothedestiel (@summersteve), with art by eliotsvests (surprisegents). Explicit. 28,189 words. I am not a cheesy Christmas movie person, and I am not a kid!fic person. So I thought this might not be the story for me, at first. But I’m so glad I clicked on it - this is a story about second chances, and finding happiness when you aren’t even looking for it. And I love the way little Teddy is written here. He’s got all the sweetness of Quentin Coldwater’s son, without tilting over into being saccharine. This is just the right amount of sweet if you want to put yourself back in the holiday spirit.

I’ll Follow My Secret Heart by OrchardsinSnow (@orchardsinsnow). Mature. 17,613 words. I don’t really know how to describe this one… it’s weird! It’s a meet cute, Eliot gets in an accident, there’s a blizzard, bed (floor) sharing so as to prevent freezing to death, Eliot is kinda famous and Quentin doesn’t know. All I can say is, this is precious, and odd, and I got totally swept up in the world.

I Need You So Much Closer by OrchardsinSnow (@orchardsinsnow). Explicit. 14,436 words. I love this story. Eliot is a musician, he and Quentin are exes from years ago, who fell apart because of Eliot’s alcoholism. But he’s sober now, and he’s touring where Quentin lives - so they reconnect. Eliot calls Quentin the “smoke show love of [his] life” at one point in this fic, and that phrase just… stuck with me in the best way. Don’t miss the mini-sequel, You Need Me So Much Closer (Explicit, 3,874 words), either. I really hope the author writes more in this universe!

Experimentation by portraitofemmy (@portraitofemmy). Explicit. 4,812 words. PWP where Eliot meets Quentin at a sex shop and Eliot teaches him what he’s into. Hot hot hot.

(i just might) remember that night by portraitofemmy (@portraitofemmy). Explicit. 4,732 words. This might be crack, I don’t know. There are dick pics, and it’s silly, but also Quentin and Eliot feel this amazing connection to each other right off the bat, and that is honestly my jam.

and if tomorrow it’s all over (at least we had it for a moment) by sirfoxheart (@sirfoxheart). Explicit. 45,461 words. Quentin and Eliot were a couple in high school, but they haven’t seen each other in years. They run into each other again at Julia’s wedding, and everything comes rushing back. I like the fact that this fic features very little (if any) angst. The idea is that these two people missed out on their chance to be together, but they haven’t been desperately pining for years. But once they’re back in a room together… their connection is undeniable. Also, the sex is great.

hold me like a (liar) lover does by sirfoxheart (@sirfoxheart) with art by Doomkitty25. Explicit. 80,812 words. A holiday fic! Fake dating! Mutual pining! So tropey and excellent. Really hot sex, as is the norm for this author! Warning for Alice being something of a villain in this piece, although there’s a potential reconciliation implied right at the end. I love this fic for going beyond just the romance, and also telling a story about Quentin and Eliot’s careers, and what they want out of their lives - in terms of romance, yes, but in terms of their work lives as well.

Ask Me, I Won’t Say No by vegansheilseitan. Explicit. 22,616 words. A… pub trivia AU? Which is a thing I didn’t know I needed? Mostly this is about widower!Quentin, with a kid, meeting Eliot Waugh. They fall in love. The sex in this is incendiary, but the growing relationship between these two is what really makes it worth the read.

~~~~~

Alternate Universe (With Magic)

These stories feature roughly the same worldbuilding as the show’s canon, but the character’s journeys deviate significantly. Maybe Quentin and Eliot don’t meet at Brakebills, or their journey to getting there is different in some other way!

fire and life by everytuesday. Teen. 7,060 words. This is a high school AU, where Eliot discovers his magic, and accidentally kills his father. Quentin helps him to bury the body. It’s a little bit dark, obviously, given that description… so take care.

First Year by peacefrog (@lizardkingeliot). Mature. 11,957 words. Quentin is a Brakebills student, who also happens to be a sylph from Fillory. He has wings, and Eliot is more than a little intrigued. The author may have plans to write a sequel!

push me (further than i thought i could go) by peacefrog (@lizardkingeliot). Explicit. 15,036 words. Quentin and Eliot meet at a game of Push, and then have their own private contest later on. Mostly recommending this one for the sex, but also for Confident Quentin Coldwater, and for the fact that no matter the circumstances, these boys are gone for each other pretty much right away.

Hedges, Bitch by portraitofemmy (@portraitofemmy). Explicit. 56,568 words. This series has four works, the longest “main” story of which, theón kai andrón, is another personal favorite of mine. It features Eliot as the leader of a coven of hedge witches, and Quentin as a magical novice who didn’t make it into Brakebills. I love the dynamic between Quentin and Eliot in these stories, as they fall naturally into a dom/sub relationship, but Eliot works to make sure the power differential between them doesn’t adversely affect things, either on the job, or in their personal lives. Eliot is just so soft for Quentin in these stories, while also admiring him and depending on him as the gang gets themselves caught up in a dangerous threat to hedges all over the world.

~~~~~

Fillory/Royalty

These stories are sometimes canon deviations, and usually deal with Eliot as the High King, and his relationship with Quentin from there.

oh this is us, this is love and this is where I sleep by buckybunnyteeth. Explicit. 4,360 words. Quentin is jealous of Idri! Eliot is way, way too delighted about it. Really hot. I probably shouldn’t be as charmed by jealous!Quentin as I am. But this is amazing.

Make a list of things you need by longnationalnightmare. Explicit. 10,264 words. Eliot and Quentin are getting married, but Eliot’s okay with keeping it platonic. Quentin… is not. Hot, hot, hot.

i’d be the last shred of truth (in the lost myth of true love) by milominderbinder (@disasterbiquentin), with art by gilestel. Eliot and Margo are made the High Kings of Fillory, and then later Eliot meets a cute Brakebills professor Quentin Coldwater, who is staying at Whitespire for research. There’s a truth curse! Eliot is set to marry Idri, but uh-oh, feelings happen! Tropey as hell, super cute.

and this is the map of my heart by peacefrog (@lizardkingeliot). Explicit. 14,033 words. Eliot is High King, and he is expected to marry. Quentin magnanimously offers himself for the position, and of course there’s angst about that. And scorching hot sex. And Eliot struggling to be emotionally vulnerable. One of my absolute favorites from the author.

whitespire by peacefrog (@lizardkingeliot). Explicit. 1,529 words. Eliot sits on his throne, Quentin drops to his knees and calls him “Your Majesty.” So… yeah. Yum.

~~~~~

Brian and Nigel

This is an area where more content needs to exist! Send me a note if there are some I’ve missed.

A Little Disguised, or a Little Mistaken by Page161of180. Mature. 17,807 words. Brian and Nigel find each other, and fall in love. This is gorgeous. Quentin and Eliot are recognizably themselves, but also just different enough that when their real selves start poking through the memory wipe, you can feel the change coming. Another story where canon comes along and steals happiness right out from under them. They were so close!

Shine Through My Memory by PanBoleyn (@eidetictelekinetic). Mature. 61,311 words. This one starts as a fic about Brian and Nigel meeting and falling in love… and then the Monster still possesses Nigel/Eliot, and the events of season four continue from there. But with memories of Brian and Nigel’s love in Quentin’s head, things play out a little differently. We follow the story all the way through to Eliot getting saved by Margo and Quentin, and the reconciliation/reunion afterwards. This fic has a little of everything, and it’s really the only re-telling of season four I’ve seen that covers the canon plot while adding something new and unique to the story!

Reaching in the Dark by sirfoxheart (@sirfoxheart). Mature. 53,040 words. Eliot remembers who he is, but Quentin thinks he’s Brian. Eliot and Alice work together to protect Quentin from the Monster. This is so complex and difficult and sad and challenging, and when you reach the end, you’ll feel so frustrated about how close they were to figuring their shit out. But ultimately, canon comes back to snatch that happy ending away.

~~~~~

Other

The few fics that I couldn’t categorize neatly into any of the above sections.

So It May As Well Be Me by achray. Explicit. 14,596 words. There was only one bed. Trapped in a closet. Sex pollen. Sex magic rituals. Every fanfic trope becomes manifest. Quentin seems oblivious; Eliot is freaking out. This is just the epitome of fun.

our place in the family of things by greywash, with art by yourtinseltinkerbell (@yourtinseltinkerbell). Explicit. 208,582 words. This is sort of a Brakebills AU, I suppose, but it takes place after Eliot has graduated. Quentin comes to visit over the holidays. So here’s the thing about greywash’s prose - they are stunning. They are dense, and complex, and almost hard to read - but I mean that as the highest compliment. This story, and really all of this author’s work, rewards careful study. This story has so, so much to offer. So if you haven’t given it a shot, or you’re intimidated by the length, please give it a try. Featuring Eliot’s complex relationship with his mother, with religion, with his sexuality, with Quentin, with Margo. Featuring a story of queer love that transcends time and convention. Featuring some excellent worldbuilding, especially as concerns Quentin’s family, and Eliot’s career. Featuring beautiful accompanying artwork. Featuring a proposal scene that knocked me the fuck out. Featuring love, in every way.

To Give You Hope and a Future by Page161of180. Not rated. 4,374 words. I couldn’t put this in the fix-it category, or in the mosaic category, or really even in the post-season four category. It’s all and none of those things. Eliot, in the aftermath of Quentin’s death, goes to the mosaic and talks to old man Quentin, who is grieving his husband. This is sad, y’all. But cathartic, too.

Cheat Day by peacefrog (@lizardkingeliot). Explicit. 1,624 words. Set during season four. Quentin misses Eliot, and does something sad and dangerous. Short and… well, sweet is the wrong word. This one will punch you right in the gut.

Movement by pineapplecrushface (@pineapplecrushface). Explicit. 17,036 words. These are three stories that are only loosely connected in that they are about sex, and introspection. They fit into lots of categories - parts of them take place in Eliot’s happy place, parts at the mosaic, parts in the aftermath of possession. All three stories in the series are scorching hot and full of so much feeling. I really admire how they weave through time, following the changing dynamics through the events of canon in a really unique way.

darkness, welcoming by portraitofemmy (@portraitofemmy). Explicit. 17,748 words. I almost put this in the Alternate Universe (With Magic) section, but this is not the same world as canon. Eliot is a vampire! He saves Quentin’s life and then… uh… well, they fall in love, and there’s some blood play. Eliot is super smitten, and it’s precious. Also really hot.

What Was and What Will Be by ProofOfConcept and wilddragonflying. Mature. 35,996 words. This is part mosaic-fic, part post-possession fic… it’s basically just another story of these two idiots being so bad at communication, but finally getting it right. A really satisfying journey, encompassing so many elements of what we all wished for in canon. I especially loved the long and difficult conversation they have during their reunion. The line that really punched me in the gut was: “fuck you for saying ‘I love you’ for the first goddamn time when you’re breaking up with me.”

kiss me harder, you’re better than you know by propinquitous (@propinquitous). Explicit. 4,633 words. This could easily take place in a nebulous post-season-four world, but it exists in its own little bubble and could really slot into any given universe. It deals with Quentin’s depression in a really direct, really devastating way, but also features Eliot being there for Quentin as best as he can. As the tags say, “not the healthiest of coping mechanisms.” But it’s filled with so much tenderness I can hardly stand it.

To Feel the Same by Rizandace (@Nellie-Elizabeth). Teen. 1,725 words. A small gap-filler at the end of the “I think you should probably hug me right now” scene in 2x01.

[thundercakes22]

where the love light please

Rating: Gen 

Fandom: Captain America 

Ship: Sam Wilson/Steve Rogers 

Words: 858

Read on AO3 here

Gift for @xnovamore​ through @samstevesmallgifts​

Prompt: SamSteve + Christmastime

I tried to work the kids and the dancing in there too! Hope you like it! 

Another strong wind rattles the shutters, making Sam look out the window. The snow seems to have picked up over the past hour, making him optimistic for a white Christmas. He sees more than a few lopsided snowmen in his future. 

“Looks like the sleds will be put to good use,” he calls over his shoulder, towards the kitchen. 

“Mmhmm,” the response is garbled and unclear. Sam rolls his eyes. 

“There better be enough cookies left to take to my mom’s tomorrow, Steve.” He can almost see the guilty hunch of Steve’s shoulders as the snap of closing tupperware sounds. 

Sam huffs a laugh and squats to readjust the gift under the tree, turning it this way and that to find the best angle to illuminate the metallic wrapping paper. He catches Figaro, the girls’ moody cat, eyeing the tree from his perch on the back of the couch. 

“Don’t even think about it,” Sam warns, shooing the little beast from the room. 

He straightens, taking a step back to admire the view. Steve thinks rearranging the furniture was going overboard, but Sam’s superior eye knows that a tree in the northwest corner means optimal lighting on Christmas morning. So they had to shift the couches and rewire the entertainment center, big whoop. It’s their first Christmas all in one house, of course Sam’s going all out. It would all be worth it to see the looks on the kid’s faces. 

He’s always loved Christmas. Loved the lights and the music and the time with his family. More than anything, he’s loved making it a magical time for his girls. It’s always worked out well for them before. Six years ago, Alex and Xela’s adoption was finalized on December 13th. The year after that, Figaro wandered in through the kitchen window the week after Thanksgiving and never left. And last year, Sam met his fiancé at a mutual friend’s white elephant party. This season was special to him. Sacred. And he was going to make this one perfect for his new family and their new home. 

Sam checks the other decorations in the room, glancing over the garland around the bannister, the stockings on the mantle and the mistletoe hanging in the doorway. He sighs, satisfied. Everything’s in its place for the three eight year olds who would come barreling down the stairs in just a few hours. 

Behind him, there’s the scratch of his father’s old record player and Leslie Odom Jr’s warm voice begins to croon. Strong arms wrap around him from behind and Steve’s eternally warm chest presses against Sam’s back.

I’ll be home for Christmas

You can count on me 

Sam sighs again, letting the music wash over him. “You think they’ll like it?”

Steve’s chin settles on his shoulder. “Without a doubt.” His arms tighten around Sam’s middle. “Paige is just thrilled to have a real tree this year and I’m sure Alex and Xela already know what you’re like.” 

Sam thwacks Steve’s hands where they're crossed over his stomach. He’s not that bad. Just a bit… exuberant. “I just want this to be perfect for them. Between the move, and wedding planning, and the busy season at the store. I haven’t spent as much time with them as I’d like lately. There’s been so much change in so little time. I want this to be easy for them. I want to start making memories together.” His eyes flick around the room, checking again that everything is set just right. 

Steve tugs on Sam’s hip, spinning him around, and bringing their joined hands to the air by his shoulder. The other slides around Sam’s waist, pulling him close to slowly sway from side to side. Sam instinctively reaches for Steve’s shoulder and laughs.

“Oh ho, look at you!”

“I got moves,” Steve grins, puffing out his chest. 

“Mmm,” Sam hums. “And why have I never seen them before?” He smirks, tilting his head to look Steve in the eye.

“Gotta keep something in the holster.” Steve pivots on one heel, spinning them in an easy, if only slightly awkward turn. “Keep you on your toes.”

“That you do, love.” Sam leans into his embrace, letting Steve lead them in a slow box step. 

“You don’t have to worry,” Steve whispers in his ear. “The kids know. How much you love them, that these changes are just as much about them as us. That we’re a family now. They know, Sam. And that’s because of you. The way you love us. The way you’ve steered us all through this year. You’re an incredible father.” 

Sam blinks back grateful tears. “So are you,” he whispers into Steve’s neck. He can feel the heat rise in his fiancé’s face. It’s a title Steve’s been hesitant to take on, but could never deny. He’s the only father Paige has ever known, the rest is just technicalities. It was the first thing Sam loved about Steve, the way he loves that little girl. 

Steve’s fingers twist in the soft cotton at the small of Sam’s back. 

“Merry Christmas, Sam.” 

“Merry Christmas, Steve.

If only in my dreams

[dragonturtle2]

My greatest apprehensions for the new My Little Pony movie & generation.

Today MLP Generation 5 has been made available on Netflix, and on Saturday I’ll be seeing it with my friends in the Milwaukee Bronies. I’ve had an uneasy feeling about it, and finally putting much of that into words was helpful. It was certainly interesting, and I’d like to share it with other people. I’ve done so with only a few, but I want to put this out there before anyone thinks my opinion is contaminated by either seeing the movie, or something getting spoiled. Tomorrow I may be relieved, let down, or just impressed that I managed to predict so much. Something I’ve definitely kept in mind is that with Generation 4’s premieres, finales, and own movie, the trailers were always cut unimpressively (IMHO). So I tended to be pleasantly surprised with pretty much everything I watch from G4, when I even bothered looking at the trailers. So I’ll be quite happy to be proven wrong this Saturday. Now…

They certainly didn’t intend to be flipping off everything Gen 4 established. No creator ever tries that when they’re brought into a franchise in the payroll of the IP owners. But for their society to regress to this point of segregation? The only thought process I can think of for this bizarre departure are A) The new show staff threw their hands up on matching anything with G4... or B) they came up with a totally fresh setting and timeline, and then some exec or analyst at Hasbro said “Heck no, you are GOING to connect this with our previous money-printing machine. Got it?” And that level of mandated storytelling doesn’t fill me with confidence.

I’ve heard at least one comparison to the Sequel Trilogy, which I expected. True, there’s some notable superficial similarities. It’s decades(?) later, the original heroes are spoken of as myths, for various reasons the world is in trouble, and our protagonist is a disciple-slash-fangirl of what the previous heroes fought for. But this is way more drastic and bizarre of a development.

The conflict in the Sequel Trilogy for the galaxy at large is that the Empire has returned, but rebranded. A new set of new jerks wanted power, teamed up with some of the old jerks, got a bunch of big guns, and held the galaxy hostage. That’s something that just happens in repeated strokes of history. It’s the re-drawing of a bunch of borders. The only moral failing there is being lax with fascists.

Having the Sequel Trilogy retread a plot also isn’t as weird as the My Little Pony franchise. The Force Awakens was made decades after the OT concluded, and the previous Prequel Trilogy took a really different direction and wasn’t received well. Then the franchise got completely new owners. So going back to its roots to start things out was a logical move. It’s only been THREE YEARS between these different shows of MLP, so the repetition doesn’t have much charm. Although repetition may not be the right word, since the setup for this show’s racial dilemma is way more extreme.

Equestria for some reason has gone through a jaw-dropping morale decay. Not only have they embraced division they were fighting against in seasons 8 & 9, they’ve regressed to the level of segregation before Equestria was FOUNDED. The Star Wars equivalent of that would be not only everyone fighting the First Order, they also suddenly don’t allow Wookies and other aliens to drink from the water fountains. Like, how the heck did that turn into a problem?

If the only progress undone from Gen 4 were the relationships with the non-ponies introduced later, that would actually make more sense. Social equality has reactionary backlash, which often occurs immediately after landmark victories. Ponies were the ones that held the most power on the world stage (some kinds more than others in Equestria).

But the WAY bigger issue isn’t internal logic and retcons. I learned long ago to set aside any expectation of a reward or pandering for my years-long commitment to a toy franchise. It’s the potential mishandling of the topic of racism, and I worry we’ve already on shaky ground. The morale of “segregation is bad” feels like bottom of the barrel, kind of copout way of tackling racism. At least, it does for settings that are extremely modern like Generation 5 clearly is. Segregation of people by ethnicity, by rule of law, has fully shifted to obsolesce in the cultural landscape of first world countries. Not even the most deranged lunatics in our government like Boebert or Greene advocate for it (not yet anyway). Stories about segregation can still be done really well of course, but it can’t just be about wiping it off the lawbooks and solving everything. It needs look at why people do this in the first place, who fights for it as the status quo, and what social structures and habits keep the thing in place despite the efforts of good people.

Of course, we still HAVE segregation in society. Not legally, but de facto thanks to economic status and civic planning. And not just physical separation, but grotesque imbalances of power and means. Look at job opportunities, home ownership, insurance evaluations, scrutiny by police, investment in local schools, etc. In G4 it was pretty clear that WAY more unicorns got to live in the lap of luxury or centers of commerce and education. Earth ponies were more spread out, rural, and based on an agrarian existence to feed the country. It’s not that G4 did much with it, but that kind of setup is way closer to modern day inequality, and would be a more fertile bed for those kind of stories. Admittedly, the Pegasi city in the trailer looked absolutely LOADED, so maybe we do have that element in store.

What the trailers and press releases are saying feels weak even as just a segregation story. The ponies separating makes segregation look like a bunch of people moving out like feuding roommates… instead of being put in place by a group of people with WAY more power and money than everyone else. Segregation is portrayed as a mutual agreement, not exploitation. My worry is that they’re going to go to Pocahontas routes, and make the root of racism a select few rich figureheads spreading lies. And undoubtedly, rich people in the private and public sector DO profit off of ignorance and violence, and divert attention from real problems. But when white people in America were treating everyone as subhuman, it wasn’t FEAR that was driving it (at least, not exclusively). For one, it was profit and sheer convenience. Manual labor and the least desirable tasks could be foisted on to ‘lesser’ peoples, and they wouldn’t even require a humane wage. Even if there hadn’t been those empirical benefits, discrimination also brought the sadistic sense of self-importance that comes from standing on someone else’s neck. The imaginary structures of racism let people feel comfortable about their place in the universe.

I wouldn’t call Zecora’s introductory episode all that nuanced, but it was definitely more accurate to real life than the (hopefully hypothetical) scenario I described above. In Bridle Gossip, it’s extremely apparent that the Pony majority of Ponyville are the ones acting like tools, and singling out Zecora for being different. They are the ones obligated to apologize to HER. (Even though it’s of course awkward that they wrote Zecora as a rhyming witch doctor, when she’s meant to represent an African person. It might not be so bad if she wasn’t the ONLY Zebra, and the only creature coded that way.)

Companies and studios will gladly tell their audiences to sympathize with victimized individuals and populations of oppression, and hate the individual acts done upon them. But then they’ll get cagey about making some members of the audience feel any kind of guilt, from distantly benefitting from that system; or maybe even subtlety being part of one. It’s not good for the bottom line to name a civilian population for taking any racist, oppressive or outright murderous actions. No, it’s a single evil dictator (or CEO, or general) and their gaggle of cronies, who just needs to be overthrown. We see this toothless crud play out over and over because corporate entities are either A) that naive, or B) scared of some losers with megaphones losing their minds over the suggestion of self-examination. Some people are SO fragile at the idea of self-examination, or guilt. Because it goes back to having an identity, an innocent and sympathetic self-image.

[walkeddeath]

Ship meme: gen & barrel

who is more likely to hurt the other? tbh gen but not physically, cause there's always the super fun chance they'll just kinda vanish without a word (it wouldn't be intentional or something she wants to do but ya know it might happen) who is emotionally stronger? i feel it's equal here! who is physically stronger? ngl gen but she rarely advertises it who is more likely to break a bone? gen again and probably whilst doing something incredibly stupid. who knows best what to say to upset the other? maybe gen? the likelihood of it happening is low but they can be incredibly cruel if necessary. who is most likely to apologise first after an argument? they apologize at the same time like the exact same time. who treats who’s wounds more often?  gen treats barrel's more often i do feel this to be true. they'll let him treat theirs even if it's unecessary tho. who is in constant need of comfort? i'm saying barrel for this despite gen being a complainer. who gets more jealous?  this might be another equal thing but also gen will deny any jealousy accusations thrown her way SO. who’s most likely to walk out on the other?  I JUST DONT SEE IT HAPPENING IM SORRY unless it's some dumbass attempt to protect the other. who will propose?  gen would fake propose with an onion ring who has the most difficult parents? this goes to barrel bcs gen's dads are the absolute fucking best and they'd both want to adopt him so who initiates hand-holding when they’re out in public?  immediately goes to gen and i can pull up my meta abt gen and holding hands this will always go to them no matter what! who comes up for the other all the time?  i'd say him with them who hogs the blankets?  gen no contest. who gets more sad?  probs barrel who is better at cheering the other up?  again i think it's an equal thing but i also think gen is maybe like 1% better at it. who’s the one that playfully slaps the other all the time after they make silly jokes? this goes to gen ! who is more streetwise? tbqh it's barrel who is more wise? gen but they very rarely show it who’s the shyest?  barrel and this is actually canon who boasts about the other more?  ohhh gen is a chronic partner boaster like very much so. who sits on who’s lap? i mean he could try sitting on their lap but it'd look silly.

[mlovesstories]

Feeling the Burn Part 7 (FINAL)

Warnings: panic attacks, cussing, emotions

Words: 2200

AN: FINAL CHAPTER, PEOPLE! 

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Danneel followed Jensen into their bedroom.  

“Baby?” She caught up to him and pulled at his arm to turn him around.  Finally seeing his face, she noted the dark circles and puffy eyes.  “I’m sorry it was hard,” she pulled him into her.  “It’s okay.”

“I had a panic attack, and I-” he stopped.  “I’m so tired.” Danneel rubbed his back.  She stayed quiet for a moment.  

“It’s okay.  No worries.” She felt his muscles stiffen.  “Breathe,” Danneel whispered.  “You’re here with me, and I love you.  What do you see right now?” She backed up from him to look at his face.  “Jensen?”

“Umm.  You, the wood floor, the bed, the fan, and the door.”

“Good boy,” she smiled. Danneel interlaced her fingers with his and guided him to the bed. “Sit down,” she gently stood over him as he lowered himself to a seated position on the bed.

“I-“ he tried to explain himself.  “I need to go to the brewery for the meeting with the investors-”

“Shh. Gino can take care of it.  Let me help you. No talking, okay?” She looked up at him and smiled. “Let me do it. You relax.” Danneel undressed Jensen and retrieved his pajamas for him.

“I can do it,” he whispered.

“You can, but you won’t.” Danneel changed his clothes as he sat there. Standing up to pull his pajama bottoms on, he hugged her again. “Go take a nap, babe.” His wife pulled back the blankets and walked to her closet. He saw her walk back with an old teddy bear with its nose ripped off. “Here, Mr. Teddy will help.” Blankly he laid himself down.

“I don’t need it,” he tried to refuse.

“Yes, you do. I’ll put him right here for you. Rest,” Danneel put the bear in her place on the bed. “Sleep.” She kissed his nose and left the room.  

_________

Jensen walked down the stairs at ten in the evening after his nap.  At the same time, YN walked inside with her FBBC employee tshirt on.  

“How come you’re home so late? Weren’t you here when I came home?” Jensen ran a hand over his tired and groggy face.  

“Someone called out.  Had to waitress tonight.” She threw her bag against the wall and followed Jesen into the living room where they crashed on the couch.  “You okay?”

“Yeah. I think so.  How’d you do serving?”

“I’ve been doing it on and off.  I know the menu and all that.  It was fine.”

“You have?” Jensen looked to her.

“Yeah. You’re deflecting.  You’re really tired.” YN observed his body language. “Panic attack, I’m guessing.”

“How did you know?”

“You were tired.  You never get tired.  And it’s really hard. At least sometimes.” YN shrugged.  

“Yeah. I needed to sleep.”  

“It’s okay.  Sometimes that’s a good thing.”

“I cried, and it’s exhausting.  I don’t cry.” Jensen dismissed her.

“Jensen.” YN caught his attention.  “Crying isn’t bad and you know it.  I’m not having this conversation with you.  Glad you’re okay though.”  YN hugged Jensen’s side.  

“Sorry.  I wonder where Dee went.” Jensen looked around him.  

“Padalecki house.  She and Gen were going to do a craft or bake or something.”  YN stated.  

“Maybe they made me pie,” Jensen grinned.  

“Selfish, much?” YN giggled.  

“You should go to bed.” Jensen told her.  He felt her relax against him.  

“It’s Friday!  I’m fine.”

“You’re falling asleep against me, I can feel you.”

“Can we watch a movie?  I know you’re going to be up a while.”

“Yeah, fine.  Braveheart?” Jensen suggested a movie.  

“That makes me nauseated. Let’s watch something funny. Minions?”

“Ugh.  Fine.” Jensen playfully rolled his eyes.  “Get it on the screen.  I’ll make some popcorn.”  Jensen stood up and left the room.  

—————

“Bed, both of you,” Danneel nudged the two on the couch. YN startled awake. Jensen felt YN move away from him.

“Huh?”

“Bed. Come on.” Danneel put her hands out to help YN and Jensen off the couch.

“Good night,” YN walked up the stairs.

————

Jared was sitting at the kitchen island when YN entered.

“Hey Pads,” she sighed.

“Morning, we’re going for a run, you wanna go?”

“Yes, she’s going. Get changed and brush your teeth,” Jensen answered for her. She narrowed her eyes at him. “You make me go to therapy, I want you to get your energy out. I’d say fair trade,” he devilishly smiled.

“Come on, Jensen,” YN whined.

“I’ve seen you getting anxious. I know your counselor told you it would be good for you. Come on, get your stuff. 2 minutes.”

“Whatever,” YN turned and trudged up the stairs.

The two grown men chuckled.

“Let’s go!” Jensen yelled up the stairs. YN came barreling down.

“Do I have to?” YN groaned sarcastically.

“Yes,” the boys answered in unison. She grinned.

________

“I gotta walk and take a break, I haven’t ran in a while,” YN huffed.  She slowed on the trail.  

“Nuh uh.  We’ll slow down.  We gotta keep going though,” Jared stated.

“I haven’t run hundreds of miles like you two.” YN defended herself.  

“Yeah, me too.’ Jensen slowed.  

“Come on, bud,” Jared encouraged.  

“No, I can’t.” Jensen’s breath quickened.  Jared, ahead of the other two, didn’t stop but asked them to keep going.  

“Jared, stop.”  YN called.  The tallest one turned around.  “Jensen!” He ran to his friend who was grabbing at his own chest.  

“Panic attack,” YN told Jared.  “Had one yesterday.”

“Okay, buddy.” Jared said calmly. “Give me your jacket, YN.” YN pulled the piece of clothing from around the waist and lied it down and put it against a tree.  Jared slowly helped Jensen lean against it so that the shirt was like a barrier between his head and the bark of the tree.  

“Ughnf.” Jensen stated.  

“I know.  Feel the dirt.  Squeeze my hand,” Jared prompted.  YN watched as Jensen grabbed the granules around him.  “Ground yourself,  No, don’t close your eyes.  Look at YN.  Tell me how she’s feeling.”  YN took her cue to smile.

“She’s happy.”

“Good.”

YN made a silly face, and Jensen laughed.  

After a few minutes of resting and help from YN and Jared, they pulled him up off the ground.  Jared dusted Jensen off.

“Okay, let’s go.” Jensen started running ahead of them.  

“No, dude.  We’re walking. Don’t act all tough.” Jared caught up with him.  

“Sorry.”

When they arrived back at the Ackles’ home, Danneel saw Jensen’s face.  She looked to Jared, and he nodded.  

“Go take a shower, babe.”

“I- I, I can’t.” His hip hit the corner of the table and lost his footing.  He caught himself before he fell.

“Come on. “ Jared put his shoulder under Jensen’s armpit and guided him to a downstairs bathroom and sat him on the toilet lid.  

“What happened?” Danneel walked to YN.  

“Panic attack on the trail.  He will be okay.”

“I know, it just makes me sad that he is going through that.”

“Dee?” Jared walked back into the kitchen.

“Yeah?”

“I think he needs to sit for a second, but he’ll need help cleaning up.  He’s out of it, but he’s okay.  Can I grab a shower upstairs?”

“Yeah. ‘Course.” Danneel passed Jared and kissed him on the cheek.  “Thank you.”

As she left, Jared looked over to YN.  

“You gonna be okay?”

“Yep, I’ll be fine.  I’m going to go clean up in my room.” YN shrugged.  “See ya in a few.”

The two walked to their respective showers.  

“Jensen, I’m going to help you,” Danneel started to undress him.  He moved his foot out of the way, scaring her, making her fall on her rear.  “JENSEN!  You almost kicked me!”

“I can’t… I don’t know what’s going on with me!” Danneel slowly stood up and watched Jensen’s facial expression.  She opened her arms and pulled his head and neck against her abs to hug him.  She felt him relax against her.  

“Breathe.”

“I’m sorry.”

“You’re fine.” Danneel backed away and lifted his shirt, pulling it over his head. When he was ready, she guided him into the shower and sat him on the in-shower seat.  Danneel washed his hair and body, rinsing him off after.  “There, all done.”

After everyone had showered, they all got comfortable on the couches in the movie room.  

“Hey,” YN whispered.  

“What?” Jensen looked at her.  

“Feel better?”

“Yeah, thanks.”

“Good.” YN leaned against his shoulder.  Before the movie started, she fell asleep.  

“Looks like we tired her out,” Jared looked past Jensen and Danneel to YN in the last recliner.

“It was good for her.  Let’s enjoy the movie, she’ll be fine there.” Danneel smiled.  

________

YN woke up lying over on the console of the recliner.  She walked into the kitchen, seeing the sunlight flooding the room.  

“Morning, sweetheart. It’s Noon.”

“Hey, Jens.” YN smiled.  “You awake?” She giggled.

“Sort of.  Slept really good last night.”

“Come here,” she wrapped her arms around him.  “Glad you slept well.”

“I’m sorry.  I didn’t mean to freak out yesterday.”

“Stop it.  You don’t get to apologize for stuff like this.  It isn’t your fault, and you know it.”

“You’re too smart, you know that?”

“Shut up and drink some coffee.” YN offered a cup to him.  Jensen nodded.  

YN’s phone rang.  They both jumped.  

“Yeah?” YN answered.

“Hello, sister.”

“Kenyan?” She gasped. Jensen turned to her immediately.  He walked so that he was standing next to her.  “How did you get this number?”

“The brewery is a nice place.  Not very secure though.  Let’s just say I should be the head of the HR department.  Got lots of information in here.  Your application is terrible though.”

“I was fifteen and a half when I did it, not exactly an award-winning speech was needed for the job, asshole.”

Jensen grabbed his phone to call the police when he heard where the half-brother was.  YN grabbed his wrist and shook her head at him.  He narrowed his eyes at her, curious.  

“He’s not there, he’s just messing with me,” she wrote on a napkin.  

“What’s it like to be rich?” Kenyan scoffed.  

“I am not rich, and just because someone may have money does not mean they are jerks.  What do you want, Kenyan?”

“Just to let you know that I know about the video.  And… your new dad should have burned.”

Jensen tightened his jaw.

“Shut up, Kenyan.”

“You better call 911. It looks like the storage room might have a little damage.”

Kenyan hung up.

YN gasped for air. Jensen pulled her into a hug while calling the police, telling them what had happened. The original investigator told them to meet him at the brewery, it had been, indeed, damaged.

—————-

“No.”

“I need to go.” YN stopped her foot. “He tried to kill you!”

“He thought it was you. You are not going with me. Stay at the house. I called Jared and Gen. They are coming over to be here with you and Dee. I need to go. I’ll be back in a few hours,” he stepped toward her. “I love you.” After quickly kissing the top of her head, he put a jacket over his shoulder and left.

“Ass.”

“He’s just trying to protect you,” Danneel said.

“I can do it myself.”

“You’re used to doing it on your own. But you aren’t going to.”

“Whatever.” YN started to ascend the stairs.

“Don’t you dare think about sneaking out either!” Danneel yelled after her.

“With three wardens, how could I?!” YN shouted back.

“Ugh.” Danneel groaned. “Come on, baby,” she whispered sadly.

———-

Jensen arrived back home in the late evening.  

“Hey, everybody,” he smiled and threw his keys on the entry table.  

“Did they get him,” YN stood from where the group was sitting in the living room to stand facing Jensen.  

“Yeah, they did.  He was hiding on the property. They tracked him by his boot prints or something.”

In relief, YN reached for Jensen and squeezed him tightly.

“Hey, it’s okay.  It always was.” Jensen reassured her.  

“This,” she yanked up his long-sleeved henley, “proves that it wasn’t.” YN pointed to his scars.  

“Okay, okay,” he calmed her.  YN backed away when Danneel walked over and side-hugged her husband.  

“How’s the storage room?”

“No real damage.  Weird that Kenyan would say that.  Maybe a few scratches.  He carved his name into the building, that’s all we could see.” Jensen shrugged.  

“I’m sorry,” YN whispered and started to turn back toward the couches.  Danneel stepped in front of her.  YN stopped and looked down.  

“It’s not your fault.  Just because you’re related to him doesn’t mean you are to blame.  Now that we know everyone is safe, why don’t you take a bath and go to bed, huh?”

“I’ll try.” YN said with a sigh and waited until Danneel moved out of the way and then ascended the stairs to her room.  

After she left, Gen asked if Jensen was okay.  He sat down across from Gen and Jared.  

“Yeah.  I just don’t get it.  He plays mind games… why?  She hasn’t done anything.  The brewery is fine though.”

Danneel sat next to him on the couch and looped her fingers into his.  

“Some people are shitheads,” Jared affirmed and took a sip of his beer.  

“Yeah…” Jensen sighed. He wrapped an arm around Danneel and leaned against her.  “I’m tired.”

________

“Hey,” Jensen nudged YN. “Wake up.”

YN sat up on the couch in the brewery breakroom.  

“Huh?” She wiped her eyes.

“Why are you sleeping here, kid? And who’s Kenyan?”

It was all a dream.  

FEELING THE BURN

@supraveng​

@do-as-i-please​

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[kykyonthemoon]

A Trip to the Countryside

Dragon Raja Fanfic

Paring: Chisei Gen x Lyris (MC)

Summary: Chisei took Lyris to his hometown and spent a the day together.

(From Chisei Gen’s in game messages.)

Word count: 1800+

This work is a part of Allies  - a series based on in game text messages, letters or moments by Allies themselves.

For @soul-dancer-lyris~ Hope you enjoy the story~

----------

Read more of my DR fanfic here: x

or on AO3: x

-------------------------------

The rain came and left in a haste, leaving a lingering smell of wet ground, mixed with roasted sweet potatoes.

The smell made Lyris hungry. Following the aroma, she found a small vending cart by a corner of Tokyo street. It was not her first time trying roasted sweet potatos, but the first time trying one from a cart. It was more delicious than she had expected! The warm roasted sweet potato made Lyris happy, especially in this kind of weather.

She decided to share that little happiness with someone, so she took out her phone in one hand, the other still held onto the bag of roasted sweet potatoes.

“Chisei Gen! Chisei Gen! Listen!”

The reply came almost immediately after the message was sent.

“What’s wrong? What happened?”

Lyris giggled to herself, or her gemini – the one that was floating around her. Chisei Gen replied so fast! He must have thought something had happened to her. That meant, he cared.

“Oh, nothing. There’s just someone selling delicious roasted sweet potatoes by Kabukicho!”

“Oh? Is there anything strange about that?”

“It’s different from where I came from. They sell roasted sweet potatoes in ovens made out of remodeled oil barrels.”

“You sound like some kind of expert.” Chisei seemed to be more relaxed with his reply. “I guess you like to eat roasted sweet potatoes.”

“I want to tell you about this because it’s so rare to see it.”

Lyris found a seat by the riverside while waaiting for Chisei’s reply. She sat down on a bench and gazed at the other part of the city, across the river. It was nighttime. All the city lights turned into stars. She thought of what Chisei would be doing at that moment, and felt thankful for his replies to her messages, despite the busy life of the High Patriarch.

“Have you done much traveling?” He asked.

“Yes, I like to travel outside the country when I have time.”

Lyris loved traveling. That was why she appeared in Tokyo, while she was supposed to stay in Cassell and do her essay. She thought a change of air would be nice. And another reason was that she wanted to see Chisei Gen.

“I admire that kind of life. I travel for business, but it’s mostly just to handle local affairs. I’m also quite busy with work, so I don’t have much time to take a vacation.”

Lyris let out a sigh as she was reading his text. Chisei was always, always busy. He seemed to work all the time when his eyes were open! She doubted he would actually rest at night. That guy was the man of work. He breathed in work.

But he had once or twice talked about his dream. Surprisingly, it was not becoming the most successful person in the world; nor bringing his clan to the most glorious days. He only wanted to be a sunscreen vendor, living his life freely somewhere in a French beach…

How could a High Patriarch, the Emperor of all Hydras have such a thought? People would laugh at his dream, and tell him to snap back to reality. But Lyris did not. She listened carefully to all his thoughts. To her, it was brave of Chisei to have that dream, and to keep it alive inside his heart even though the world told him to let go.

Lyris enjoyed another roasted sweet potato from the bag as they exchanged messages about how Chisei missed the beach in France. Her gemini sat beside her, teasing her for wanting to be there with him.

“This beach sounds like your first love. No wonder you’re so obsessed with it.” Lyris replied lightheartedly, with a snickering emote.

“Lyris, you must be joking! What do you mean, first love?”

A finger tapped on the phone screen repeatedly, Lyris was thinking of what to reply next. But another message came:

“Speaking of which, actually, I didn’t grow up in Tokyo.”

“Oh, really?” Lyris quickly replied.

“When I was a child, I lived in a small mountain village… But what about you, Lyris? Where did you grow up?”

“I’ve been in the city since I was born. I’ve never lived in the countryside.”

Lyris replied, but she wished she had lived in the countryside too. She wanted to know Chisei more, and to know about the life he had lived long before becoming the High Patriarch who only knew work.

Lyris stared at the phone screen. She took notice of the three dots popping up next to Chisei’s avatar, indicating that he was typing something. But long minutes passed by, the dots kept appearing and disappearing. She grew nervous. Would Chisei prefer girls from the countryside than city girls, like her?

But his next message was something she could not expect, “Would you like to go and see the village I lived in? The scenery is quite nice.”

Lyris was sent to the clouds! She stood up from the seat, with her phone held close to chest, and she started dancing around with her gemini.

“Is he asking me out? He must be asking me out!”

Lyris beamed and danced, ignoring the curious eyes of the passerby. She kept dancing until her gemini reminded that she had not replied to Chisei yet.

“Oops! How could I almost forget?!”

And she hastily sent him a message, “Of course! I’d love to!”

That night, Lyris danced with her gemini gleefully all the way back home.

 ***

 On a sunny morning, Lyris dressed in her favorite blue floral dress that matched her eyes color and waited patiently by Tokyo street. With every car came in sight, she tip-toed, gazing at it with a fluttering heart.

Chisei arrived at last. He was wearing casual outfit; a white shirt and dark pants, black shoes, and even a pair of glasses. He was completely different from the every-day-High-Patriarch-Chisei-Gen. And that made Lyris’ heart beat too fast! As if it could jump right out of her chest and fall into Chisei’s hand when he stood there, reaching a hand out towards her. She could not help but sneak glances at him all the way to his hometown. Chisei caught her a few times. He only turned away and smiled to himself, which made her heart flutter even more.

Katori Town was not far from Tokyo. Lyris was excited, and a bit nervous. It was her first time being here, and she was with Chisei!

The view was very different from the city. Lyris took a deep breath, inhaling the fresh air and the fragrance of grass. This place, it was beautiful, and it belonged to the young Chisei. Lyris turned around to look at him. His eyes spoke nostalgia, and she was thankful he had taken her to this place with him.

They decided to take a stroll in the forest. Lyris had so many things to ask, but she wanted Chisei to speak first, to open up first about his childhood.

“When I was a child, I lived here, in this village with green forests, flowing streams and hanging stoves in wooden houses. In the summers, I practiced holding my breath in the streams, and watched the fish swam past my eyes. In the snowy winters, I chiseled holes in the ice to catch fish, which I’d then cook into a soup… Those early years were the happiest in my life.”

They reached a small wooden house which seemed to be abandoned for so long. It was locked. Chisei gazed at it with an unspoken sadness in his eyes.

“Is this… your old house?” Lyris softly asked.

“Yeah.”

“I assume that you don’t want to come in…”

Chisei turned to look at Lyris. Though his face showed no emotion, his hazel eyes betrayed him.

“I’m sorry, Lyris… But I’m afraid that once I unlock the doors, memories of the place would escape… The good ones, and even the bad ones…”

“We don’t have to go in if you don’t want to,” said Lyris. She was worried about him. “When we talked on the phone, and on the way coming here, I thought you only had good memories of this place… But it seems like I was wrong.”

Chisei looked down on the ground, advoiding her eyes. He must have done it wrong. He should not be so emotional and weak in front of Lyris. She did not come here for a sad Chisei, did she?

But Chisei would never know, Lyris felt utterly happy that he had shown her another side of his. She took his hand and said, “If you have bad memories about this place, how about creating good ones to replace them?”

Chisei seemed surprised. “Replace the bad memories?”

“Yes! You just told me about catching fish in the streams, and cooking soup,… That sounds really fun! I haven’t done anything like that before. I want Chisei to teach me how to hold my breath, catch fish and use hanging stoves! So when I think about this place, my mind will be fillied with memories of Chisei! And Chisei will remember the memories with me as a part of this place too!”

Was it a faint blush she caught on his face? Chisei smiled softly as she gazed down on her beautiful face.

“Lyris, you know that it will take a lot of time to learn all of those, right?”

“No problem! You just need to bring me here again and again and again, until I learn all!”

Chisei’s smile turned into a big grin. “I’ll take you here as many times as you want.”

When he saw her beam, he thought it was even more radiant than the most beautiful sunrise on the mountain that he could remember. That day, Chisei took Lyris to the streams and they caught lots of fish. They made soup and roasted sweet potatoes together when the sun set. Chisei had never met a beautiful city girl who was willing to get her dress dirty and do all the hard work she was not familiar with.

By the end of the day, they both sat down on the hill looking up at the stars. Lyris, though exhausted, still kept a smile on her face.

“I’ve never had this much fun... Thank you, Chisei Gen.”

Chisei looked at her and smiled, without saying anything. Lyris had to ask out of curiosity.

“Why are you staring at me?”

“You have dirt… on your face.”

“Huh?!” Lyris tried to brush off the dirt on her face sheepishly. Chisei always liked beautiful girls. How could she let him see her being ugly, even for just a moment?

“Don’t worry.” Chisei said softly. The wind messed with his hair as he placed a hand on her face, a finger caressed her cheek. “You’re still the most beautiful girl I’ve ever laid my eyes on.”

-The end-

[thejakeformerlyknownasprince]

Why do you think Tobias is so popular and Jake so unpopular among the fans?

I mean, assuming we can trust the results of the probably-unrepresentative sample in that poll... I have a couple of guesses.

First of all, Tobias is, in many ways, the most classic SF hero on the whole team.  As @derinthemadscientist puts it:

One of my favourite things about Tobias is how he’s made of pretty much every cheesy heroic stereotype ever and still turns out to be Just Some Guy on the team. Neglected orphan? Check. Finds out his father is a mysterious hero/alien/mythological being who grants him magical powers and leaves him with a destiny to save the world? Check. Birth, life and grand destiny planned out by somebody who might as well be a god? Check. Incredibly beautiful and physically capable warrior girl love interest? Check. Loses something important for awhile, learns some valuable lessons, has it magically restored by his patron god figure? Check. Granted mysterious knowledge from an ancestor and/or patron god figure to help him on his quest? Both do!  I love Tobias. I love Tobias’ incredibly cheesy past and the fact that it does not matter in the slightest. (X)

I think that a lot of us started reading SF in the first place because we love crap like “you are the only human descendant of an ancient alien warrior bloodline” and “you are a savior figure to an entire species.”  Add to that Tobias growing up disadvantaged and underestimated, and then finding out about his destiny?  He is THE classic (and Classical) hero, in many regards.

Secondly, there’s Tobias’s dysmorphia.  He spends pretty much the entire series feeling as though he doesn’t fully “fit” in his body, regardless of which body he happens to be using.  There are advantages in his mind to hawkness, and humanness, and eventually to andaliteness, but none of those forms is fully him.  His journey throughout the series is less about him choosing one or the other, and instead about him learning to love himself in all his pluripotent ever-changing uniqueness.  He ultimately chooses not to choose, remaining hawk because it also allows him to be human and andalite and hork-bajir as well for limited periods of time, and all of those become a part of who he is.

Therefore, it’s no surprise that trans readers see themselves in Tobias.  In the kid who has to actively fight to keep a form that isn’t what he was assigned at birth.  In the kid who can fulfill the fantasy of simply changing one’s body to match one’s identity, in a story where even that change offers no easy answers.  In the kid who defies definition — “half human, half hawk, half andalite... unique to the universe” — and embraces the entire spectrum of possibilities instead (MM3).  Tobias confounds people like Taylor who think in absolutes.  He makes no attempt to apologize to the andalites like Gonrod who are appalled at his very existence.  In the world of Animorphs, Tobias is heroic specifically because of his many-faceted identity and ever-changing body.

Third, there’s Tobias’s very Millennial sense of humor.  He’s technically a Gen X-er, so he’s ahead of the curve, but his cheerfully nihilistic outlook fits really well with New Sincerity.  The weird specific brand of humor (“I’d die for you”/“then perish”; “when you’re dead inside but still hella cute”; etc) that’s all the rage on the internet right now aligns really well with Tobias’s fatalistic, absurdist, self-deprecating, unapologetically dorky sense of humor.

Tobias is the one to lean into Marco’s “roadkill” quips with descriptions of regurgitating squirrel bones (#35), the first person to comment on the weird optics of entering a single bathroom stall with Jake (#16) or sitting as a bird on top of a police car (#23).  He’s the guy who intends to “be sarcastic untilfurther notice” out of protest over turning into a dolphin (#15).  He makes constant jokes about impressing the other birds with his barrel rolls (#51), wristwatches (#3), and thieving skills (#21).  Tobias doesn’t care about looking cool when he could instead get a good laugh out of being uncool (#29).  He’s so contemporary, he’s practically anachronistic.

Fourth, there’s the woobie factor.  In a series that is super-mean to all six of its protagonists, Tobias is nevertheless the one that could arguably benefit the most from a warm hug and a soothing cup of tea.  He is criminally underloved for pretty much his entire life, and he gets beat to hell throughout the war.  Although the others all have some combination of stressful antebellum circumstances (Marco) or hellish loneliness during the war itself (Ax), Tobias gets maybe the worst of both worlds.  That appeals to the fan sensibility that wants to rush in and help him, whether through hurt-comfort fan fiction or simply through declaring that Tobias’s guardians might not appreciate him BUT WE DO, BY GUM!  Tobias is the kind of character that demands that one love him and care for him, simply because he needs it so badly.

In the process, Tobias draws attention to the “found family” aspect of the Animorphs maybe more than any other character.  Elfangor literally tells him “Go to your friends... they are your family now” (gee thanks, deadbeat dad!) which drives home the fact that Tobias needs a family.  He finds one, in Ax especially, but all of the others as well.  As Rachel points out, he was a stranger when they walked through that construction site together, but he’s undeniably part of their ultra-codependent little unit within a few months of joining the team (#20).  I’m a sucker for a found-family dynamic, as I think most people are, and Tobias in many ways forms the fulcrum for the Animorphs family.

Anyway, Jake is none of that.  He’s too serious for his own good, a classic Mom Friend who isn’t particularly good at picking up on humor.  He’s quite privileged at the start of the series, the only one living with a nuclear family in a suburban McMansion.  Applegate repeatedly draws attention to the ways that he isn’t aware of gender or race or class, because he has the privilege to ignore those things.  He’s also an atypical hero in the sense that he’s an academically and socially mediocre dumb jock, one who has exactly zero extraordinary skills and who achieves greatness only through hard work and nearly-infinite trial and error.  If Tobias is almost perfectly positioned to appeal to the current zeitgeist, Jake is in many ways Tobias’s exact opposite.

[antiques-for-geeks]

Game Review : Space Raiders

Sinclair ZX81 / Sinclair Research/Psion/Mikro-Gen / 1982 / Originally £3.95

Ladies and gentlemen, we give you the golden age of cover art.

Good artists borrow, great artists steal. A comment that is often associated with the late Steve Jobs about his appropriating the GUI concept from Xerox PARC in the 1980s. It’s not an unromantic ideal - the young upstart company taking a technology from another, bigger organisation that had gold on its hands but didn’t know it.

Except Steve Jobs didn’t come up with the quote. He said as much in Triumph of the Nerds when interviewed. He didn’t claim to be the father of the modern GUI either; he just happened to see the potential of putting a low(er)-cost computer in the hands of the public that had a GUI.

The early days of the computing revolution were a kleptomaniac’s dream; intellectual property was respected, however it was done very much in a homage sense, rather than a paying-a-licencing-fee-and-doing-an-official-conversion sense.

Bedroom coders everywhere were getting in on the action, developing home versions of popular arcade titles, safe in the knowledge that Atari, Taito or Namco would not send the lawyers after them. After all, this was the early 1980s. Most of the time these companies didn’t know the kids were making these clones in the first place.

So, enter Space Raiders published by Sinclair Research. No prizes for guessing which arcade machine is being ripped-off here. It seems rather pointless to go through the gameplay; it’s so famous after 40 years of public consciousness that going through the mechanics of the game would seem a waste of time.

Let battle commence!

This version does not deviate too far from the golden formula. Some features are missing, like the bonus saucer craft that you can shoot. That said, alien ships come down the screen, and you with your moving gun must defend. Clear the screen and it continues. Over and over and over until they finally manage to land or you lose all of your lives.

Or get bored and unplug the computer.

Or stand up, knock the desk causing the memory expansion on your ZX81 to wiggle and the machine to promptly crash.

So, with the game being so ubiquitous, it’s difficult to stand out without ‘ruining’ the pure Space Invaders experience. Also, at the time there was little need to; this game would come at a time when recreating the arcade was impossible on home machinery - the Atari 2600 might have been the reference hardware for the home in the US, but even that could not hope to live up to the experience you’d get shoving small change into arcade machines. Though you could get some distance to replicating the feel by turning the lights off, have your younger brother spit out his half-eaten sweets on the floor near the machine to make the carpet nice and sticky and get your Mum to shout at you “This is a cafe, not a change machine. If you want change for those bloody machines you’ll have to buy something you little prick. They should bring back conscription. You’d learn some proper respect!” each time you ventured from the gloom into the kitchen.

Your shot is the upper case I, the alien bomb is the *. Interestingly neither you nor your foe can fire again until the projectiles hit their mark or whizz off the screen.

While released by Sinclair in 1982, the game is actually the older Space Invaders coded by Mikro-Gen in 1981. That release had the usual (for the time) monochrome packaging and was not available on shop shelves as games would come to be. The Sinclair release sees the title packaged with another, Bomber, a Blitz variant on the B-side of the cassette. Sinclair seemed to have worked with Psion (later of Organiser fame), who developed the ZX Spectrum version of Space Raiders to bring a similar game to the ZX81 at the same time. Shame that Psion did little more than just recycle an old title.

Buying it today

There are two versions - the ZX81 and Spectrum. The covers are more or less identical, so it’d be easy to get the two mixed up if you were not too careful.

The Spectrum version seems to be the more prevalent on auction sites. The ZX81 version reviewed here was not produced in as great numbers and so commands a higher price. Prices do vary from £10 to £50 depending on condition and how gullible the seller thinks people are. Expect to be able to get it for the lower end of these two figures at the present time.

Note that there is a cartridge version for the Spectrum. These are quite rare and can cost around the £60 mark. If you end up with that, well done. Now you just need to find a ZX Interface 2 so you can play it.

Commentariat

Tim : I’m going to be straight with you. This was the first game that I ever played, so my opinion of the game is really tinted. Back when I first got my ZX81, I absolutely loved it and played it for hours and hours. One particularly epic game was played at the end of the day with the prospect of bed-time looming. I made it count, going further than ever before; my parents, failing to understand the seismic nature of what they had just seen, sent me to bed instead of cracking open the champagne.

Playing it again, I can’t pretend it’s not a disappointment; it certainly isn’t how I remember it, but in these situations, it never is...

Graphically it’s not impressive, even for the ZX81; the coders could really have got more out of the hardware especially as game requires a 16k expansion in order to play the game. That said, it certainly plays well enough. It is harder than other Space Invaders clones out there, but it kind of has to be to ensure you get your money’s worth, which probably says more about the higher quality of the opposition than anything else.

The hardness kept me coming back for more when I first had it, but given that it was this, Bomber or the ICL “Fun to Learn” educational series tape that my folks had bought me in the vain hope I’d learn geography from the computer, it was an easy market to please. Now, it can grip me enough to play it, but the longevity isn’t there.

So is there much to recommend it today? Sadly no. A trip down memory lane, but not a particularly good one.

Pop : Ah, gaming on the ZX81… a tricky proposition on the painful and unresponsive keyboard. If you’ve never experienced it, try to imagine using the buttons on your microwave to play your PS4. Luckily this game of space invaders can be enjoyed at a slow pace! I can’t honestly remember if it was this or another invaders clone I played back in the day, but it’s barely passable fodder for the ‘81. Space Invaders is already a simple game, so leaving out stuff like the saucer is and the invaders speeding up as they get fewer is criminal. At least the bunkers are all present and correct. Still, I’d have happily played this back in may games-starved youth. If you’re going to (re)visit the machine today, check out something like 3D Defender or even better 3D Monster Maze...

Meat : Really, have we reached the bottom of the barrel this quickly? In some ways I jest, but really you’d only want to play this for nostalgia’s sake. Given that it needs a 16k expansion to run, I’d want to have something far better than this. Even for the time. It’s not that the aliens don’t traverse the screen properly sometimes. It’s not the missing saucer bonus alien. It’s not the absence of sound (which I can forgive - you can’t magic up sound from a machine with no ability to generate it). It’s not the lack of bitmap graphics. It’s just that in 16k you’d expect them to do something half decent. Like redefine a character set. For heaven’s sake, they could squeeze a game of chess into 1k at the same time, so I expect better here.

There is so little recommend this today. A couple of goes and the fun is exhausted. Unless you are a collector, save your money and head for better titles on the machine. If you really must have a Space Invaders clone from the era, try Avenger for the Vic 20. Hell, even the dull Atari 2600 Space Invaders cart is better than this.

Score card

Presentation 6/10

At a time when a photocopied inlay with a dour pencil drawing was the norm, the cover was incredibly stylish and smart. Seriously, look at it!

Originality 2/10

Sadly it can’t score highly here. Even in 1982 Space Invaders clones were ‘me too’ products.

Graphics 2/10

Uses the inbuilt graphics character set - plenty of scope (and memory) to do something else, even without a bitmap display.

Hookability 7/10

Plays well and draws you in quickly and effectively.

Sound N/A

The ZX81 has no sound output so unsurprisingly, neither does the game.

Lastability 3/10

While it hooks you in, at the end of the day it’s still ‘just’ Space Invaders. While tough, the missing features means there isn’t the depth to bring you back too often.

Value for Money 5/10

Will give you a fair amount of fun, even with its’ drawbacks. Plus there is a second game - Bomber - on side B.

Overall 4/10

You will get some fun out of it on your ZX81 but if you’re emulating, it’s not really worth the effort, sadly. Nostalgia will only get you so far. If you must play Space Invaders on a ZX81, try QS Invaders.