#(anyways i think he deserves to put on a favorite album and ramble about its concept story before carefree dancing to it)

[familiaanteomnia]

not me thinking about how gabriel is- a) really skilled and resourceful b) possible prodigy regarding his power *given how young he was/that his answer strongly impacted his future* yet- he undoubtedly never went to school, didn’t have much socialization until he gets out on his own *even then it’s pretty limited i’d say*.... he doesn’t own a car however he knows how to drive one, he doesn’t obviously own a boat but he knows how to steer one etc yet he lacks in knowing movies, pop culture etc most likely (doesn’t seem to own even a basic cellphone or tv etc) probably grew up without all of it and then found himself enamoured with music/books more anyways

[27-royal-teas]

Ok i know that probably like, none of you listen to arrows in action but they just released their debut LP today so i decided to ramble about them a bit because they deserve it and if no ones gonna create fan content for them i will.

First of all theyre a florida formed pop punk band (in my opinion, it floats more to alternative/pop) and now apparently they are located in tennessee. There are four guys- victor viramontes,  the singer, jesse frimmel, the drummer, and matthew fowler, the guitarist. 

Im gonna talk about the song that got me into them. It’s called All The Ways I Could Die. during science class i mostly just listen to music because my teacher never gives us any useful information and that was the song that came up in my queue. obviously you dont care about this information but i feel as though it needed to be shared. Anyway, the song’s chorus goes like ‘i just can’t wait to go sit in my room/contemplate all the ways i could die/ self sabotage is an old friend of mine/ and self care just inst worth the time’. 

Pretty depressing, right? But the whole thing is that music, it’s a form of connection, and the thing about arrows in action songs is that they feel so personal. Like, they feel like something you can shout in the rain and out the back of a car, scream at the top of your lungs and feel every word, spin-in-the-summer, fall in the grass. Also, im not sure who’s the songwriter (80% sure that it’s victor) (it is, i just checked) but the lyrics are REALLY FUCKING GOOD. like, maybe not pete wentz good, but nobody’s pete wentz, and they are REALLY GOOD for their first LP. since i started listening to them, I havent found a single song i dislike. Like, they really are so good. 

AND!!! I WANT TO TALK ABOUT THEIR HOOKS!!! One thing thats very consistent in their music is the sound and also the hooks. Theyve got this clear, clean sound, and im honestly very surprised that they havent been signed to a label by now since they have such consistently good music (and since they’ve been making music since 2017). And every single hook is good. listen to ‘Entropy’ off the new album. It is CRUNCHY. It is CLEAN. Its what i call tasty, like running your tongue on the flat metal of a refrigerated kitchen knife (not that id ever do that, of course). Like, it feels sharp and cold but slightly jagged. i could talk about it for hours. Also the high note in Put You Through Me literally makes me ascend. 

Also, audience engagement. If you look through the comment sections of their music videos, most of the comments have been liked by the band. Ive sent them art i did for The Credits and Head In The Clouds and Checking in and they’ve replied. They communicate with their audience which really does hammer in the connection aspect- connection with the audience, connection with their art, connection with the music. also theyre just really nice dudes in general like. yeah theyre just cool

Another thing i think is kind of interesting is that their producer is dan swank! I fucking love dan swank! he worked with all time low (one of my favorites) for a really long time, and ive seen him on some of their acoustic music videos from 2021 (hes the guy playing piano and doing backup vocals with alex). Hes good!!! I didnt realize that he produced music, so this was a really cool thing to find out. Worlds collide

So, yeah. Arrows in action, man. They’re great, and you should check them out. They’re like all time low but toned down, but it wouldn’t work to compare them to another band because they’re this new, beautiful thing, and they are so good, and i am going to stop talking about them now. Anyway yes go listen immediately and STREAM BUILT TO LAST 

[i-think-i-luv-ya]

Gunshot - KARD M/V Review Rant

I’m at it again with another so called review, when in reality its just a whole essay on my thoughts of my favorite artist’s comebacks, aka a rant lol. If you haven’t seen Gunshot, GO WATCH IT! I promise it’s amazing and this is one of their best songs/videos/comebacks etc. I have attached the video so no excuses! Also this is a lot of spoilers so don’t read this first it will ruin the shock and awe that is this video. And putting the “keep reading” to contain said spoilers and so ya’ll who don’t wanna read this don’t have to scroll endlessly to reach the end of my rambling.

Hi! Hello! Thank you for continuing reading! Lolol my Taemin 2KIDZ review actually got notes which was surprising, so hope you guys like this. I have a lot to say so here we go...

So first I wanna start on the meaning of the song. On his VLIVE BM said the song is about verbal abuse and how detrimental it can be to your mental health. Considering many pop songs, especially kpop, are all very cheery and upbeat I applaud them for covering such a serious topic in a way that’s not sad and slow. PLUS BM is creating new merch called healers where everything will be donated to an organization that fights against bullying (including homophobia and racism) which is incredible so be sure to check that out when it’s dropped. 

So on that note I wanna get into the song itself. Let’s start with lyrics. The song starts with the words “LOVE damn 4 letters” like what a perfect way to start a song. Also the way they blend a lot more English into this song is something I love as a non-Korean speaker. Plus the parts in English are so powerful? Well so are the Korean lyrics. Like KARD you guys just went hard with this whole song. The chorus is literally “You words are like a gunshot, I’m bleeding love”. Just wow. That definitely describes verbal abuse perfectly, especially coming from those you love because it’s those cruel words from loved ones that hurt the most. I mean “the words you spit out kill me like bullets”, how else is there to describe that pain because it fucking sucks. Other lyrics that just show the words are coming from the one you love: “As long as you love me, the good or the ugly, everything is okay” as well as “I won’t surrender my darling”.  And this relationship is obviously toxic with words like “Selfish I will never be enough even when I pour out all of myself” and “It’s like you control me, without you I’m lonely” and “So far you’ve concealed the true color” and “Without you dying slowly”. And they clearly have had enough with this abuse with lyrics like “Need to drag myself out of there, remove you from my life, take off the tag you” and “They hit me like a gunshot, I’ve bled enough”. 

Now into the sound of the song. It has all the classic KARD elements: it has a powerful sound with the instrumentals, it’s faced paced, it’s something you can dance to, and it has that chorus that slows down then just picks up again. But this song just sounds very different than anything they’ve released before? Not in a bad way, since this is probably one of their best songs. Between the lyrics, the vocals, and the overall sound where the music just doesn’t completely take over like in some of their other songs. Don’t get me wrong I love songs like BOMB BOMB, but it was very loud and a lot happening in the song at once. Which isn’t a bad thing, cuz that’s like the perfect club song. But with this song (and the whole album really) it shows them refining their sound. Also they had a lot more involvement with this song, especially BM who did everything from lyrics to producing which probably has a lot to do with it. The music itself just goes perfectly with the vocals. Just the flow is really nice, and the beat is fun, and them gun shots really just add to it. And can we talk about that breakdown when BM is like “1 shot, 2 shot, 3 shot, 4″? Like what??!! Those sirens and everything just ramps up just before it ends, like yaasssss. 

Now the music video! It starts with Jiwoo zipping up a body bag...which just sets the tone for the video cuz it’s like ok this is how it starts lets see how tf we got here. Then you find out at the end it Jiwoo zipping up the body bag of...well Jiwoo lol like WHAT THE FUCK?! (I’ll get into this here in a sec). Anyway in terms of the video it also has some classic KARD elements like the choreography that’s very intense and dramatic, the bright colors, the flashes and lasers, some crazy stuff happening, and some really cool props and visuals (not just the members lol). Other common stuff is the piles of technology surrounding them, especially J.seph. Like in Red Moon, there’s cameras and old televisions around them. This time the video starts with them being surrounded by cameras and J.seph has a pile of old computer monitors. There may be some meaning with this, but I don’t get it but think it’s an interesting theme. Perhaps its an analogy for them being constantly watched and put on every screen, like showing a darker side of being a celebrity (also will get into this in a minute when I talk about interesting interpretations and theories). 

Also this video gave me suicide squad vibes. Like Jiwoo with them pony tails and the way her makeup was done resembled Harley Quinn. And idk BM gave me Joker vibes (may be due to the coloring of his teeth), BUT he also gave me Harley vibes with the blue and pink coloring of his blonde hair (which is just an amazing look for him). Then BM was just covering everything in black, Jiwoo is just fucking shit up, Somin is ready to cut a bitch, and J.seph is burning shit up as usual (just like BOMB BOMB, so another parallel). Everyone looked good in this video...like they are all such great visuals. Somin looked like a queen as always with the jewelry and everything (they always do that and she looks stunning). Jiwoo pulls of that outfit with those threads everywhere, like that would drive me crazy yet she looks amazing. Blonde BM is truly a look. And J.seph? I think this was the best he’s looked in any video...maybe its the dark hair and clothes paired with those light contacts that just make his eyes stand out. Idk but looks good, all of them! Even with all those slashes to their faces! Also this video is a lot less sexualized, especially with the girls but that’s a whole other topic for another day.

So we know this song is about verbal abuse. I talked about how it could be from someone you love. Obviously the cuts on their faces are caused by the words and pain inflicted on them, until eventually its more than just lashes but a full on gunshot killing them completely. An interesting theory I read is this is a song to their fans, or really people just leaving hate comments. Again you can draw from the cameras and screens how their whole life is recorded, and how they are trying their best pouring their heart and soul into their music when they get all this hate and criticism. So these “shots” hurt the most when it comes from their fans. Also going with this concept, Jiwoo shooting herself could be killing who she is to be who they want her to be. Although there’s so many interpretations, especially to the ending. Like it could be her killing the weaker and darker part of herself (like the part of herself willing to put up with the abuse out of love), so by killing that part of her she is free. BUT, could this “winner” be that dark part of herself killing who she used to be? This could also be killing that pain, but by embracing it and letting it morph you into something darker like a person embracing that evil and using it to make themselves stronger and protect themselves. OR she is causing this pain on herself, it’s her own words are the insecurities and lack of love to herself that is affecting her until she ends up just killing herself (not literally but figuratively). Idk so many ideas and interpretations to the ending alone. Plus we have them all just spreading this darkness and anger (like BM literally painting everything black, which is symbolic into spreading darkness). But ya this video was amazing, the visuals were stunning and the song is just great.

The rest of the album (all 2 songs...hope they release more) was just as incredible. Hold On is a farewell to J.seph who will be enlisting soon, and omg that made me cry. So J.seph you better keep your promise and return soon because we’ll be holding on and waiting for you babe! This song was also really slow (at least for a KARD song) which just shows you they can be diverse in their music. Plus just the contrast of the verses (which are just super powerful) with the chorus (which is very melodic) was great. And with AH EE YAH, like that was so nice to listen to and its a cool mix between old music with that beat it starts with, to newer music especially with the way they rap. So, shows they have a lot of influences and it also shows a different side to KARD. 

Overall I think it’s a great comeback (idk what else they have planned but hoping for some new stuff because I’ve missed them so much). Please go show support and stream Gunshot and listen to the mini album! They are so talented and deserve so much more recognition. They have such hope with this comeback, but yet they still are like “we’re never gonna be number 1″ and that just breaks my heart. So show your support, hopefully they can get a win this year or just something big happen for them because they deserve it!! So that is the end of my rant...back to watching this video for the 100th time we go!! 

[interesting-blog-name]

Frank Ocean - Blonde Review

All my time listening to rap, whenever Frank Ocean was featured on a track, everyone commenting on the song would praise him extremely highly, and honestly, I never saw the hype. The verses he’d write weren’t that good, in my eyes, but he’d have this mythical aura whenever someone talked about him, like he was the perfect singer, God’s musical gift to Earth. I never looked into his music that much, because I was too busy getting my ears blown out at age 15 from bass-boosted angry rap to look into what I assumed was an average R&B singer, a genre I didn’t have much knowledge on. So, as an introduction, I picked up Blonde.

I’m going to have somewhat of a hard time reviewing this one, and I feel like it’s because, to me, this album doesn’t really need to be written about. For Blonde to work, you have to let yourself be submerged by it, by the wonderful production mixed with Frank’s always-on-point singing; let yourself be carried by how the tracks progress, let the emotions drown you. My mistake in my first listen was that I pulled up Genius to read the lyrics while listening, and only in my second listen did I realize that’s not how it works. As Shawn Cee said when listening to Frank’s Moon River cover: “You don’t listen to Frank Ocean lyrics, you feel them.”.

Way before I thought about playing this album, I downloaded Nights and Pink + White in my phone, and - like any other song I get even a little bit attached to - played the shit out of those two tracks. This was a big mistake of my part, as when I listened to them in the context of the album, I was way too familiar to them. This is something I’ll try to overcome, this instant attachment and overplaying of tracks, where I play the same 10 songs for weeks, and then grow tired of them; I’ll try to substitute this habit with just trying to open myself up to new music, and letting the albums I’ve already listen to have a bigger effect on me when I replay them, due to me not growing tired of them from listening to them over and over. Anyway, I’m rambling.

Blonde is great at what it does, and that’s all that really matters: it is the definition of an emotional rollercoaster. The progression in the tracks is marvelous, whether it’s the beautiful closing verse over the violins in Self Control, the classic beat switch in Nights, the subtle change from synth-heaven to acoustic guitar in White Ferrari, or the voyage that is Seigfried (by the way, why is the song misspelled, couldn’t someone have looked the guy’s name up? Just a pet-peeve of mine). Frank’s vocals are so controlled and precise, they seem to just hit the perfect spot in the brain, and he and his team had this in mind; the tracks are built around his voice, the instrumentals are simplistic and at the same time beautiful, toned down, but crucial and memorable. The organ played by James Blake in Solo and Godspeed (easily the most gospel-influenced and gentle track here), the guitars in Ivy, the piano in Good Guy, they are all finely crafted in an intentionally lowkey fashion. That’s not to mention the instances where Frank’s voice becomes an instrument itself, being dowsed in effects in tracks like the just-mentioned Good Guy, the weird, distorted closing to Ivy, the high-pitched first leg of Nikes, and most notably and well-executed in my opinion, the gorgeously melancholic shorter track Close To You, where Frank sounds like he’s shapeshifted into a depressed microwave, and I mean it in the best way possible.

The impassioned scenes Frank recalls are very powerful, graced by his invested singing and simple, relatable style of songwriting. He seems to convey his feelings and memories in such an effortless, but amazing manner, that when he’s speaking of loves and summers that won’t come back, you can’t help but feel an urge to cry (or maybe I’m just too emotional). Ivy’s and Skyline To’s nostalgic tone (“That’s a pretty fucking fast year flew by, that’s a pretty long third gear in this car”), Solo’s and Nights’ wonderful, memorable choruses (“There’s a bull and a matador dueling in the sky. Inhale, in Hell, there’s Heaven.”), the rejection of the American dream in Seigfried (“Maybe I should move, settle down, two kids and a swimming pool. I’m not brave! I’d rather live outside”), stick to the listener the very first listen, and make this album more than just gorgeous melodies and strong-ass vocals.

There really isn’t much for me to say about Nights that hasn’t been said. Working brilliantly as the divisor between the two parts of the album, “Blond” and “Blonde”, the morning and the evening of the album; this song deserves all the praise it has gotten along the years, and the worst thing I can say about it is it is so addictive I almost got sick of it. The beat switch is legendary, the difference between the two parts makes the song memorable, and Frank’s vocals and flow are, of course, on point.

I can’t help but love what Frank does in Blonde, but it does have a few setbacks. Pretty Sweet is a chaotic definitive transition into the second leg of the album (separated by the beat switch in Nights) that I think could have been executed much better, as Frank’s vocal inflections in this song are probably the worst of the album, and the beginning distortion in the song is not a very welcome change of pace, and just ends up feeling out of place. The track Skyline To is not so special either, and I’m afraid I’ve grown out of Pink + White, as it doesn’t bring me the same feelings it once did when I first listened to it; that’s obviously my fault, but still, I don’t feel the song, as beautiful as Beyoncé backing vocals are, and as uplifting and nice it is on its own, shines so bright within the context of the entire album; not only that, but it also ends very abruptly, which is unfortunate.

My biggest problem with the record has to be Futura Free, however. I have very mixed feelings towards it, because in one hand, I enjoy the fresh beat drop and how the album offers it right at the last track, bringing some very standout excitement to the song, but I just can’t understand why Frank would put a 4-minute long interview with his friends, separated from the song by 32 seconds of pure silence. I appreciate all the interludes’ sense of nostalgia, the small little glimpses into Frank’s more personal life (especially with the very nice Buddy Ross sample present in all of them), but surely this interview could have been shortened and separated from the song it’s attached to. I know the album being exactly one hour long is a big deal to it, and it’s probably very difficult to round up that time perfectly without stretching some songs somehow, but surely there was space for at least a two-minute song to replace two minutes of the interview, which is mainly comprised of background noise between the chatter anyway.

Despite that, the album has way more highs than lows. The Andre 3000 verse has to be the best in the album, switching up the meanings in Solo, and even in its less memorable moments, Blonde displays an admirable elegance that will keep me coming back to it, an elegance that is displayed upfront in tracks such as Godspeed, where Frank sings a breakup song of unconditional support appreciation for his ex, for a very nice change of pace.

Overall, the production is meticulously calculated, Frank gives his best performance, it is personal, powerful, touching, and you have to be in the mood for it to work. Sit back and enjoy the experience.

 FAVORITE TRACKS: Self Control, Nights, Solo (Reprise), Close To You, White Ferrari, Seigfried, Godspeed

LEAST FAVORITE TRACK: Pretty Sweet

 8.1/10

“In the wake of a hurricane. Dark skin of a summer shade. Nosedive into flood lines. Tall tower of milk crates.”

[skiesofthesketchy]

Space + Time

4:05 am.

I can’t sleep. How can I when my mind is spinning like a carnival ride. Only this ride isn’t fun. It feels like I’m holding on for dear life.

I blame him. Why did he have to kiss me? Everything was fine before. No- everything was perfect.

He was my best friend. The person I hit up to get food with me in the middle of the night. The person I share all my new music obsessions with. The person I go to when my life gets too overwhelming.

But no. One drunken night and everything has changed.

“Come here,” he said. So I wobbled over to him on the swingset outside. The noise from the party inside ceasing with the door slamming shut. “How’s my favorite girl?” he asked.

“Drunk as fuck,” I laughed, plopping onto the swing next to him and almost spilling my drink. “What are you doing out here by yourself?”

“Just thinking.”

“About what?” I offered him my red solo cup and he took a sip.

“Look up Y/N. Look at all the stars.”

“Yeah. They’re beautiful aren’t they?”

“There are millions out there. No, billions! We can only see a tiny, tiny, stupidly tiny fraction of a fraction of what’s out there. The universe is infinite and constantly expanding at the same time. Like bitch, what?? How can something that’s infinite be expanding? That’s wack as fuck. It’s just insane.”

“Wow. You’re really high, huh?”

“And drunk but shhhh... listen. We are literally out here on a fucking rock floating in the middle of space and ya know, it’s a huge fucking rock but compared to everything, it’s not even a speck of dust.”

“I hope this epiphany you’re having leads to aliens.”

“Oh, there is no way in hell we are the only planet with life but that’s a conversation for a different time.”

“Then where are you going with this one, bud?”

“What I’m saying is nothing matters.”

“Nothing matters?”

“Nothing matters. But that’s what makes everything matter a hundred times more.”

“What do you mean?”

“What I’m saying is that everything we do, everything that we are, is all gonna disappear one day. Like yeah, we’re gonna die one day but it’s more than that. Thousands of years after we die, Earth is gonna be wiped out by the sun exploding or some shit, and it will be like this planet never existed. Its history, every soul that ever lived here over the millions of years Earth has been able to sustain life, everything. It will all just... be gone.”

“I guess so.”

“It’s just a matter of time. And time... time is all we have. It’s the only thing that is certain in this fucked up little world we live in.”

“We live and we die. That’s all we know.”

“Exactly. And we don’t know when we’re gonna die. It could be tomorrow. It could be 50 years from now. There is no way of possibly knowing. So why don’t we live like that?”

“Live like what?”

“Like we could die at any moment. Why are we so caught up in shit that doesn’t matter? Caught up in working for a better future for ourselves when you might not even live long enough to see it. We need to be living in the moment, because right now is all we have. That’s what matters.”

“Well, fuck. You’re right.” Silence washed over us, the light squeak of the swings the only thing you could hear. “Ya know, I wasn’t expecting to be this enlightened when I walked out here,” I laughed.

“Life is short, Y/N.”

“That it is.”

“That’s why I have to tell you something.”

“Okay. What is it?” I turned to him.

“I’m in love with you.”

And suddenly, he was kissing me.

4:39 am.

I’m so angry at him.

I love him so much, but as a friend. I have never seen him as anything more. I never let myself think of him differently because things were perfect as they were and I didn’t want to fuck any of it up by catching feelings.

But look. He went and fucked it all up.

“We’re friends,” I said.

“Best friends. But I’m not gonna waste my life away hiding how I feel. I’m in love with you, Y/N.”

“No, you’re not. You’re drunk. And high. You’re fucked up.”

“I am. But, it’s true. I love you. I have for a long time now.”

“Stop saying that. Please, stop saying that.”

“What else do you want me to say?”

“I’m sorry. I can’t do this right now.”

“Y/N, wait!”

That was just last night. No texts or calls all day. We were both so fucked up but this is not something you can just forget the next morning as you deal with your hangover. Everything has changed.

I got up annoyed at my inability to fall asleep and trudged to my closet, grabbing an oversized sweater. I slid on my sandals and reached for my favorite hat. My favorite band’s album cover was stitched into it and memories of that concert flooded back to me. I went with the very person I’m struggling to get off my mind. He bought that hat for me because I didn’t have the money for it.

“I can’t let you buy me a hat,” I said.

“Nonsense.” Ignoring my whines, I watched him pay for it without a second thought, smiling when he placed it upon my messy hair. “It looks good on you.”

I huffed at the memory, putting the hat on anyway. Can things ever go back to the way they were? I swung my small backpack over my shoulder and headed out my front door. Maybe a walk would help clear my thoughts.

It was chilly on this early morning. The soft breeze had me walking with my arms tucked into my sweater. Birds chirped happily, the atmosphere holding a certain peace to it. Maybe everything will work out. Maybe it will all be okay.

5:21 am.

I finally made it to my favorite park. The familiar trees and the way their leaves fluttered in the wind reminded me of home. I didn’t necessarily have this destination in mind, I sort of just wound up here. My mind was off in space.

Maybe instead of being angry at him, I should be thinking about whether I love him the way he loves me. I know I can’t pretend he never kissed me, or said all that he said. We can’t go back to how things were. Maybe I do love him... or maybe I don’t. All I know is that I’m terrified of losing him. The only thing that scares me more is breaking his heart.

Let’s say we start dating. It’s amazing. Until one day it isn’t. He deserves the world. More than that, even. All the stars in the sky, from here to the outskirts of the galaxy. What if I’m not enough? I want to be enough.

“I think I’m thinking too much,” I mumble. I climbed the playground to sit upon the monkey bars, the cold metal burning my skin. Watching the early morning joggers and the start of people’s morning commute, I felt my stupid head begin to clear.

Life is simple. We humans like to get caught up in stupid things that don’t matter, just like he said. But it really is just... simple.

Do what makes you happy. Be with people who make you happy.

Being with him makes me happy.

5:46 am.

“Y/N? What are you doing here?” My head jerked to the direction I heard the familiar voice from. Of course, it’s him.

“Nothing.” I looked away not being able to hold eye contact with him. “Just hangin.” He climbed up to sit next to me on the monkey bars. “What are you doing here?”

“Well, I came here to think but it looks like you already took my thinking spot.”

“We can sit and think together.” Silence bloomed between us and I felt his breathing match my own.

“I was thinking about thinking about you.”

I finally grasped the courage to look at him. “Me too.”

“Y/N... I’m sorry. Part of me wishes that the other night never happened.” He looked down, sadness written across his face. All I wanted to do was hug him tight and never let go.

“You don’t need to be sorry.”

“The reason I had never told you how I felt is because I was scared of losing you.”

“You’re not going to lose me.” His eyes met mine gleaming with hope. The sparkle in them only resembling beauty. “I love you more than anything and you know that. I’m just... confused,” I sighed.

“I understand.” A long silence pursued once again. “If you never want to talk to me again, I understand that too.”

“Hey, you know I don’t want that.”

“But I screwed everything up. Threw our whole friendship out the window just because I caught feelings. Feelings I’ve tried so hard to shake because I knew that you wouldn’t like me the same way and that everything would just explode in my face and we’d never see eachother again. I’ve ruined the best thing I’ve ever had,” he rambled. “I’m sorry Y/N. I’m sorry that I love you. And I’m sorry that I can’t take it back.”

And suddenly, I was kissing him.

Every emotion I’ve felt over the last thirty-something hours took over me. I kissed him with all my anger, confusion, and... love.

Who am I kidding? I love this boy in front of me. Everything about him. I love his stupid jokes and the way he hums and taps his fingers when he’s happy. I love the way he thinks and observes the world around him. I love the way he listens to me and smiles making me feel like everything is going to be okay. I love who I am when I’m with him. How nothing else matters. I love him and he loves me. What am I so afraid of?

“Hey,” I said, breaking the kiss. “I think I love you too.”

The biggest smile I’ve ever seen took over his face. “Really?” he asked.

I laughed. “Yes,” I replied. “I’m in love with you.” Our lips met once more. All of my past emotions were replaced by pure happiness. I was so confused before, but now it feels like this was meant to be. Like the stars have aligned and are smiling down on us. Like the universe stopped for one second to recognize this moment and remember it forever, even when we all turn to dust and flutter away into nothingness.

6:04 am.

“Do you want to go grab breakfast?” he asked. “I want to take my girlfriend out for some waffles.”

“Girlfriend? You never asked me to be your girlfriend,” I teased.

“Oh, fuck,” he mumbled. “Um. Y/N, will you be my girlfriend?” He looked genuinely afraid that I would say no.

“Of course.”

“Whew. I got nervous for a second.” We laughed as he helped me down from the playground.

“And yes. Waffles sound perfect.” He grabbed my hand, kissing my knuckles.

“Can we take a nap afterwards? I didn’t sleep much last night,” he spoke with a sheepish laugh.

“Oh, you’re telling me.”

*** Who did you imagine when reading this? 

*** Let me know what you think! :)

[howaminotinthestrokesyet]

Second Impressions: GNR 30 Years Later

Below I have written reviews of how I feel about each major album by the band now.

Chinese Democracy

Upon its release, I had tried listening to it, but never really committed to the whole thing. I remember a friend saying that this album was the greatest thing ever, and he meant it not as an exaggeration. Some things stood out as I went through some of the tracks that I had merely glanced over 12 years ago. This is an album that is filled with moments, where it is really good. Yet, the problem is that there are also many more moments, where the album is not so good. There seems to be an overriding sense of rambling. I have never made such a comparison before, but the songs seem to go nowhere again and again. There is an apparent lack of structure to the songs making their lyrics quite an issue because you are just waiting for something to happen, but it never does. Many of the tracks almost feel like they belong in a musical, where the singer is also pushing the plot along as he speaks to the audience. Some songs you do not even have any sort of chorus as the only thing comes in the mere mention of the name of the song in passing in a couple of lines. The beginning and ending of certain tracks are very good, but the middle part, which should be a great hook almost never delivers that catchy middle part like in the song “Rocket Queen.” You never get that great middle part to sing along with, which is also very disappointing. As for the comparison to industrial rock or Nine Inch Nails, I can see no such similarity. I would probably put this music closer to early 2000’s generic, cookie cutter, corporate rock along the lines of maybe Blink-182 or something like that. Finally, I do see where people criticize the production or the sound of the record because you can tell that it is slightly less than professional throughout the record.

The Spaghetti Incident

I never really listened to this album when it first came out. Finally, I gave the entire record my full attention a couple of days ago. One thing people may or may not realize was that this album represented no original material, but only covers. Yet, the selections do seem a bit odd since only a couple of the tracks are instantly recognizable. One of the faults of The Spaghetti Incident comes in the fact that band members most likely Slash and Duff chose the most obscure deep cut punk tracks for it. My guess would be that “Since I Don’t Have You” and “Hair of the Dog” were selected by Axl Rose. Some of the covers are very good like Johnny Thunders, but unfortunately the album seems dominated by punk tracks that are boring, repetitive, and not very catchy. I will say that the album should not be ignored completely because “Since I Don’t Have You” stands out as a very accomplished cover song. You should probably check it out anyway just to hear more songs with Duff singing. Now, another reason for possibly including so many punk covers came in the fact that Axl only sang on a couple of the tracks. In an interview, Slash spoke about how enjoyable it was to make this album. His statement seems to run counter to what has been noted as a very contentious band relationship following the Use Your Illusion Tour. I am thinking that Rose did not spend too much time in the studio working with the other band members for this record.

Use Your Illusion

This album came out when I was in high school. During that time, I could only afford one of the albums, so I chose II because it had more songs on it that I wanted to listen to at the time. Upon listening to the two albums once again, my initial reaction to the albums had been correct. The problem with much of these two albums comes in the fact that there really exists a lot of filler meaning songs that one could possibly press the skip button. II did have a couple of songs that I never really considered as ones to remember previously including “14 Years” and “Get in the Ring.” This new insight goes to show you that as a listener it is never a good idea to completely pass on tracks that did not find their way to the radio. One interesting observation that I could make about a majority of the tracks was that you can slowly see the shift from what we had heard on Appetite For Destruction and what people will eventually hear on Chinese Democracy. The songs on Use Your Illusion do start to become a bit more pop-centric and nontraditional as the lyric structure began to completely change itself. One of the words that best describes those other songs that did not quite hit the mark was that they tended to ramble without any kind of true chorus or a proper bridge. The song simply does not go anywhere. “14 Years” for me seems to hit the mark, where you can hear the influence of Izzy Stradlin in that particular song. He is listed on other tracks as contributing, but I truly believe that this is the only one that he actually plays a large part in its creation. The other band members are listed as writers on a lot of other songs, but I think Rose had much more to do with the direction of those tracks. I have said this before that Stradlin probably had mentally checked out of the band by this time thinking something had to change soon.

GN’R Lies

As I listen to GN’R Lies once again, I began to realize that back in the early 1990’s when I first heard it I never knew the first four tracks were covers. In a way, this changes one’s outlook on an album when you do realize that half the album does not represent new songs. As I think on this album, I am reminded that some journalists called the band out for being too sentimental on this album. I find that very hard to believe since one track made people believe that Axl was singing about killing his girlfriend, while another one is highlighted with racial and homophobic slurs. The song “Patience” simply took on a life of its own with this album because it is the only thing that people remember about it. The presence of the track is no surprise because the band included on the first album, “Sweet Child O’ Mine.” I had always considered this more of an EP instead of a regular album, even back in high school. The band had never really intended for this to be a full-fledged release like Appetite For Destruction. Over the years, GNR may have gotten a little more credit for this album then probably they deserved since four of the songs had actually been released previously. This fact is something to keep in mind when you start to go through the entire catalog of the band. if you look at every record up to Chinese Democracy, they had one really creative period. They had one really good period that seems to really dominate everything they did for at least 10 years. If you look at anything that was written after that the songs either take on the quality of being average or do not exist at all. The reason for this probably had to do with Axel or being addicted to drugs, or both.

Appetite For Destruction

Finally, we come to the grand opus, which I also go into detail in my next article reassessing the musical legacy of the band. After listening to it again, my love and admiration for this album back in six grade seemed spot on. Listening to it again, I am reminded that perhaps people have undersold how good this album actually is from beginning to end. There does not exist a dud of a song anywhere on this album. I thought it would be “Anything Goes,” but that song represents good quality as well. Back in the day, I never listened to “Rocket Queen,” but now it has emerged as one of my favorite songs on the album. We have seen this before with other bands, where they tend to struggle in what is labeled a sophomore slump in creating a similar album to the first one. Here, I am not talking in terms of sound, but in terms of quality. Alan McGee of Creation Records once said that most decent songwriters can make one good album, but the truly great ones can only make two. Perhaps, there was a bit of truth to that statement. The problem became for Guns N’ Roses and their fans was how in the hell did they make such a great album, then spent the rest of the time with nothing but drama, average music, and silence. Once one gets past the sense of disappointment that the band could never replicate the excellence of this album, you are caught up in this dumbfounding question on how the hell a mentally unhinged singer and three heroin addicts, and an alcoholic made the greatest debut rock album ever? I guess when looking back upon the legacy of this album you have to thank the Heavenly Father above for its very existence because they should have never been able to make this album. Yet, they did, and when it comes to GNR that will have to be enough.