#(as if i'm not already struggling with how to stay within the word count with all the example dialogue that i've collected so far lmao)

[airenyah]

i keep seeing gifs from our dining table on my dash bur unfortunately my brain refuses to let me watch anything at all that isn't a gmmtv series until i've finished writing my thesis

[hd-junglebook]

Its Always Been You

Part 4 / Word Count 5816

Masterlist

Summary: And so, the trip to Michigan begins with a little surprise guest.

In the dim glow of his bedroom, Jack's world felt like it was crumbling around him. The shadows danced across the walls, mirroring the chaos within his mind.  Jack's hands trembled as he held the phone to his ear, his breathing uneven and his heart racing.

"Luke, I don't know what to do with myself," Jack's voice trembled, a mix of anguish and vulnerability. His eyes were glassy with unshed tears, and his free hand clenched into a tight fist.  

"I've acted like a complete fool all week. Y/n hates me. I'm feeling… I'm feeling things I never felt before for y/n, and I think I've finally lost my mind."

Luke's harsh tone cut through the silence, his confusion evident. "Jack, what the hell are you talking about?" There was a rustling sound on the other end of the line, as if Luke was sitting up in bed, suddenly alert.

Jack's pacing resumed, his frustration palpable. He ran his fingers through his disheveled hair, his footsteps heavy against the carpeted floor.

The room felt suffocating, the walls closing in on him as he struggled to contain his emotions.

"I told y/n I knew how she felt about me, and then I broke her heart. She left me all alone for three days. Jesus, I just saw her locking lips with some loser in the hallway. It's taking everything in me not to go out there and drag him outside."

"Jack…" Luke barely got out before he was interrupted again.

Before Luke could respond, Jack's voice rose again, defiant and emotional. "I'm not done." He halted his pacing, standing in front of his dresser where a picture of y/n and him sat.

It was from the night of his draft party, a snapshot of happier times. Jack's fingers traced the edges of the frame, his eyes fixated on y/n's smiling face. The photograph seemed to mock him, a cruel reminder of what he had thrown away.

He thought back to that night, his emotions, how he begged her to leave her life behind and move to New Jersey. The memory was vivid, the excitement and hope he felt then now replaced by a crushing sense of regret.

The scent of her perfume, the warmth of her hand in his, the sparkle in her eyes—it all came flooding back, intensifying the ache in his chest.

Rustling came through the speaker of Jack's phone. "I ruined us, Luke. I've ruined the best thing I've ever had." Jack's voice cracked, a single tear escaping and rolling down his cheek.

"Dude, it's almost 12am, and you're babbling about something everyone and their mom knew already. How long did you think you could fight your feelings?" Luke's tone softened, a mix of exasperation and concern.

"I don't know, Luke." Jack stayed still for a moment, his shoulders slumped in defeat. The door of their apartment closed, and he hung up on Luke when he heard footsteps approaching.

Jack perked up, holding his breath as he listened to them get closer. His heart raced, a glimmer of hope sparking in his chest.

Another door closed, leading Jack to swing open his door. Y/n had already closed her door, the click of her lock reverberating through the silent apartment.

Jack's hand hovered over her doorknob, his fingers trembling. He wanted to knock, to apologize, to pour his heart out, but fear and uncertainty held him back.

…

The sound of her alarm woke her from her restless sleep, the shrill beeping cutting through the stillness of the early morning. Her eyes opened slowly, adjusting to the darkness around her.

The room was bathed in a deep, melancholic blue, the shadows clinging to the corners and casting an air of despair. The curtains, a soft, sheer fabric, billowed gently in the breeze from the slightly open window, allowing a sliver of pale moonlight to penetrate the gloom.

"Here we go again," she mumbled groggily, her voice heavy with exhaustion and resignation. The words felt thick on her tongue.

She sat up in her bed, allowing the blanket to fall in a heap on her waist. The sheets, once a comforting embrace, now felt suffocating, tangled around her legs like the thoughts that consumed her mind.

y/n looked around the room with despair, her gaze lingering on the familiar objects that held countless memories—the framed photographs on the dresser, the stack of well-worn books on the nightstand, the discarded clothing strewn across the floor.

Y/n sighed again, the sound echoing in the emptiness of the room. She pushed the blanket off of herself fully, the cool air of the apartment sending a shiver down her spine.

Her steps were light as she dressed herself, opting for comfort over style for the plane ride back to Michigan. She pulled on a soft, oversized sweater, the fabric enveloping her like a comforting hug, and a pair of well-worn leggings that had seen better days.

As she moved about the room, gathering her belongings, the floorboards creaked beneath her feet, the sound amplified by the silence that hung heavy in the air. The scent of stale coffee and the lingering aroma of chocolate chip cookies wafted through the apartment.

Jack's door opened across from her room, his yawning loud against the stark silence of the world outside their little apartment. The sound made her flinch, her body tensing as she braced herself for the inevitable encounter.

She could hear his footsteps, the shuffling of his feet against the hardwood floor, and the rustling of his clothing as he moved about his room.

Y/n rolled her eyes, not ready to interact with Jack just yet. The thought of facing him, of seeing the guilt and regret in his eyes, made her stomach churn. She focused on the task at hand, pulling her suitcase up to the door, the wheels squeaking against the floor.

Her eyes landed on the corkboard that hung on the wall beside the door, the pictures of their innocent smiles and young faces causing her heart to break even more.

In one picture, they were grinning broadly, their arms wrapped around each other's waists as they posed in front of a sunset on the beach. In another, they were dressed in formal attire, attending a friend's wedding, their eyes sparkling with happiness and love.

Y/n's fingers traced the edges of the photographs, the glossy paper cool beneath her touch. A lump formed in her throat as she studied each image. She could feel the sting of tears behind her eyes, the emotions she had been trying so hard to suppress threatening to spill over.

She pulled the door open, rushing past the open bathroom where Jack stood in the mirror, his toothbrush dangling from his mouth and a look of surprise etched on his face.

Y/n moved with the speed of a cheetah, her feet pounding against the floor as she made a beeline for the safety of the kitchen.

Just as she thought she had escaped the awkwardness, the front door jingled, keys rattling against the metal knob like a mischievous poltergeist trying to gain entry.

Y/N stood frozen in place, her body rigid with shock as the door to the apartment swung open. The sudden intrusion had caught her completely off guard, and she felt as if she had been turned to stone, unable to move or speak.

As she watched, a tuft of blonde hair bounced into view, the golden locks reminding her of the fairy tale character Goldilocks. But this was no innocent child stumbling upon a bear's cottage; this was a full-grown woman barging into her home uninvited.

"Daphne? What the hell are you doing here?" Y/N managed to choke out, her voice rising in pitch with each word until it reached a near-shriek. The disbelief and anger dripped from her tongue like bitter honey, leaving a foul taste in her mouth.

Jack's girlfriend fully entered the apartment, dragging a garishly pink suitcase behind her. It was as if she had packed her entire life into that one piece of luggage, ready to move in and stake her claim.

The suitcase was so bright it hurt Y/N's eyes, a beacon of chaos signaling the impending doom that was about to unfold.

From the corner of her eye, Y/N saw Jack emerge from the bathroom, toothbrush still dangling from his mouth. White foam dripped down his chin, making him look like a rabid dog caught in the act.

His eyes widened as he took in the scene before him, darting back and forth between the two women as if trying to comprehend the gravity of the situation he had found himself in.

Daphne's gaze flicked between Jack and Y/N, her initial smile slowly fading as realization dawned on her face. "We planned this months ago, silly," she said, her voice dripping with false sweetness.

"Non-refundable ticket. We talked about this, Jack. It's only been three months; you can't get rid of me that easily."

She let out a laugh that sounded more like a witch's cackle, her eyes gleaming with a hint of mischief and something darker, more possessive. It was clear that she had no intention of leaving, no matter how unwelcome her presence might be.

Y/N felt her heart sink into her stomach, a wave of nausea washing over her as the reality of the situation hit her like a ton of bricks. Daphne was here, in their home, and it seemed that Jack had been keeping even more secrets than she had realized.

The air in the apartment suddenly felt thick and suffocating, the tension so palpable you could cut it with a knife. Y/N's mind raced with a million questions, a million accusations, but she couldn't seem to form the words.

All she could do was stand there, frozen in place, as the world she had built with Jack came crashing down around her like a house of cards.

Jack let out a heavy sigh, his hand rubbing the front of his scalp as if trying to erase the memory of ever agreeing to this disastrous plan. His face scrunched up like he had just bitten into a particularly sour lemon, the bitterness of the situation leaving a foul taste in his mouth.

He glanced sheepishly at Y/N, his eyes darting between the two women like a puppy who had been caught chewing on his owner's favorite pair of shoes.

"Can you give us a sec? Please?" he pleaded, his voice barely above a whisper, as if he were afraid that speaking any louder would cause the fragile peace to shatter.

Y/N scoffed, her arms crossing over her chest as she fixed Jack with a withering stare. "No, we have to leave soon, and if I don't have my coffee, I just might jump off the plane dealing with you both," she retorted, her voice dripping with sarcasm.

Her eyebrows rose so high they nearly disappeared into her hairline, the thought of being trapped on a plane with these two making her seriously consider grabbing a parachute and taking her chances with gravity.

Jack's face reddened, his frustration bubbling to the surface. "We need privacy though!" he said, his voice tinged with annoyance.

He threw his hands up in the air, as if he were trying to physically push away the awkwardness that had settled over the room like a thick fog. "Could you give us some time?"

Y/N let out a humorless laugh, the sound harsh and grating in the tense silence of the apartment. "Oh, you need privacy? That's rich, coming from the guy who couldn't even bother to tell his best friend that his girlfriend was coming to visit."

She shook her head, her eyes narrowing as she fixed Jack with a look that could have melted steel. "You know what? Fine. You two lovebirds enjoy your little reunion. I'll be in my room, packing my bags and booking a one-way ticket to anywhere but here."

With that, she spun on her heel and stalked off towards her bedroom, her footsteps echoing like gunshots in the stillness of the apartment. She could feel Daphne's eyes boring into her back, could sense the smug satisfaction radiating off the other woman in waves.

But Y/N refused to let it get to her, refused to let the hurt and betrayal show on her face. She had always prided herself on being strong, on being able to handle whatever life threw her way. And she sure as hell wasn't going to let Jack or his girlfriend see her crumble.

As she reached her bedroom door, Y/N paused, her hand resting on the knob. For a moment, she was tempted to turn back, to march right up to Jack and demand an explanation.

But she knew that it would be pointless, knew that whatever he had to say would only make the pain worse.

So instead, she took a deep breath and stepped inside, slamming the door behind her with a resounding thud. And as she sank down onto her bed, her head in her hands and her heart in pieces, Y/N couldn't help but wonder how everything had gone so wrong, so fast.

…

Y/N walked back out into the living room, Daphne turned to her with an expression of exaggerated surprise. Her eyes were wide, and a cute smile was plastered on her face, the kind of smile that made you want to pinch her cheeks but also question the sincerity behind it.

"This is your best friend, right? She's a lot shorter than I remember," Daphne said, her voice dripping with false sweetness. It was clear that she was trying to get under Y/N's skin, to establish her dominance in the situation.

Y/N couldn't help but scoff, her eyes rolling so far back in her head that she nearly caught a glimpse of her own brain. "And you're the EX-girlfriend, right?" she retorted, putting extra emphasis on the "ex" part. Two could play at this game, and Y/N wasn't about to let Daphne win.

Jack let out a groan, his head falling back in frustration. "God, just my luck," he grumbled, his eyes rolling so hard they nearly got stuck in the back of his head.

He knew that he was in for a long and uncomfortable conversation with Daphne, and the thought of it made him want to crawl into a hole and never come out.

Y/N took a deep breath grabbing her coffee, the warm liquid providing a momentary comfort before made her way back out to the kitchen. Y/N grasped the cold metal handle, the chill sending a shiver down her spine.

"Let's go before I change my mind," she said, her voice flat and emotionless. She didn't want to give Jack or Daphne the satisfaction of seeing how much this situation was affecting her, didn't want to let them see the cracks in her carefully constructed façade.

…

The journey to the airport had been a tense affair, with Y/N pointedly ignoring Jack's attempts at conversation and Daphne chattering away obliviously in the background.

Y/N could feel Jack's eyes on her, his gaze heavy with unspoken apologies and explanations, but she refused to meet his eye, focusing instead on the passing scenery outside the car window.

they made their way through the bustling terminal, Jack tried once more to pull Y/N aside, his hand gently grasping her elbow. "Y/N, please, can we just talk about this?" he pleaded, his voice low and urgent.

Y/N yanked her arm away, her eyes flashing with barely contained anger. "There's nothing to talk about, Jack," she hissed, her voice sharp as a knife. "You made your choice, and now we all have to live with the consequences."

Jack's face fell, his shoulders slumping in defeat. "It's not like that, Y/N. If you would just let me explain..."

But Y/N cut him off with a bitter laugh, her head shaking in disbelief. "Explain what, Jack? How you don’t like me? How you play this stupid hot and cold game with me? No, I think I've heard enough explanations to last a lifetime."

She turned to walk away, but Jack's hand shot out once more, his fingers wrapping around her wrist. "Please, Y/N," he whispered, his eyes shining with unshed tears. "I never meant to hurt you. You have to believe that."

For a moment, Y/N wavered, her resolve crumbling in the face of Jack's obvious distress. But then she caught sight of Daphne waiting impatiently by the gate, her foot tapping, and her arms crossed, and the anger came rushing back in full force.

"I don't have to believe anything, Jack," she said, her voice cold and distant. "You made your bed, and now you have to lie in it. I just want to forget about all of this and move on with my life. So please, just leave me alone."

With that, she wrenched her arm from his grasp and strode towards the gate, her head held high and her heart shattered into a million pieces.

The seating arrangement on the plane felt like a cruel joke, a twisted game of fate that had placed Y/N in the middle of the very chaos she had been trying to escape.

She found herself sandwiched between Jack and Daphne, her body pressed against the cool glass of the window as if she could somehow merge with the clouds and drift away from the awkwardness that permeated the air.

Jack sat rigidly in the middle seat, his body a tense barrier between Y/N and Daphne. Y/N could feel the heat of his skin, could smell the familiar scent of his cologne, and it made her heart ache with a longing she couldn't quite suppress.

On Jack's other side, Daphne slept peacefully, her head lolling against his shoulder and her soft snores filling the space between them. She seemed blissfully unaware of the silent war raging within Y/N's mind, the turmoil that threatened to consume her from the inside out.

Y/N's foot tapped incessantly against the floor, a nervous habit that betrayed the inner chaos she was desperately trying to conceal. Each tap was like a metronome, counting down the seconds until she could escape the confines of the plane and the suffocating proximity to Jack.

She could feel his eyes on her once more, could sense the weight of his gaze boring into the side of her head. But she refused to look at him. Instead, she focused on the clouds outside the window, on the endless expanse of blue sky that stretched out before her.

Y/N was lost in thought, her mind a whirlwind of emotions and memories, when Jack's hand suddenly shot out, startling her back to reality. Before she could react, he had shoved a headphone into her ear, ignoring the sputtered questions and the look of indignation that flashed across her face.

His fingers brushed against her skin, sending a jolt of electricity through her body. It was a reminder of the connection they once shared, the easy intimacy that had defined their friendship for so many years. Y/N's breath caught in her throat, her heart racing as she tried to process the unexpected gesture.

As the familiar opening credits of her favorite episode of Game of Thrones filled her ear, Y/N's eyes widened in surprise. She glanced at Jack, searching his face for an explanation, but he steadfastly refused to meet her gaze.

His eyes remained fixed on the screen in front of him, as if the answers to all of life's questions could be found in the flickering images.

Y/N couldn't help but steal glances at Jack, her eyes tracing the contours of his face, the curve of his jaw, the way his lashes cast shadows on his cheeks.

Each glance was a silent question, a plea for him to acknowledge the unspoken words that hung between them. But Jack remained stoic, his attention unwavering, as if he had erected an impenetrable wall around himself.

Even as she tried to immerse herself in the show, Y/N couldn't shake the awareness of Jack's presence beside her. The warmth of his body seemed to seep into her skin, igniting a longing that she had tried so hard to suppress.

She could feel the rise and fall of his chest, could hear the soft whisper of his breath, and it made her heart ache with a bittersweet mixture of love and loss.

Beside her, Jack remained a silent presence, his body so close and yet so far away. Y/N couldn't help but wonder what he was thinking, what he was feeling.

…

Y/N stepped out of the airport, the crisp Michigan air filling her lungs and invigorating her senses. She took a deep breath, savoring the familiar scent of pine and freshly cut grass that always seemed to linger in the air.

The sun peeked through the scattered clouds, casting a warm glow on her surroundings and making the world seem a little brighter, a little more hopeful.

She scanned the crowd of people waiting outside the terminal, her eyes searching for a familiar face. And then, like a beacon in the chaos, she spotted him.

There, leaning against a sleek black car, was Luke. A grin spread across his face as he caught sight of her, his eyes crinkling at the corners in the way that had always made her heart skip a beat. "Y/N!" he called out, pushing himself off the car and striding towards her with open arms.

Without hesitation, Y/N dropped her bags and ran to meet him halfway. She threw her arms around his neck, feeling the solid warmth of his body as he wrapped his arms around her waist, lifting her off the ground in a spirited hug. For a moment, the world seemed to fall away, and all that mattered was the comfort and familiarity of Luke's embrace.

"I missed you so much," Y/N mumbled into his shoulder, her voice muffled by the fabric of his shirt. She breathed in the scent of him, a mixture of cologne and something uniquely Luke, and felt a wave of nostalgia wash over her.

Luke chuckled, the sound rumbling through his chest and vibrating against her own. "I missed you too, shorty. It's good to have you back."

He set her back down on the ground, but kept his arms around her, as if he was afraid she might disappear if he let go. Y/N couldn't help but smile up at him, feeling a sense of warmth and belonging that she hadn't felt in a long time.

Behind them, the sound of footsteps on the pavement broke the spell. Y/N turned to see Jack and Daphne approaching, their faces a mixture of exhaustion and something else, something harder to define. Jack's eyes met hers for a brief moment, a flash of emotion passing between them before he looked away, his jaw clenching.

Luke's arms tightened around Y/N, a silent show of support and protection. "Hey Jack, Daphne," he said, his voice carefully neutral. "Glad you could make it."

Daphne smiled, the expression not quite reaching her eyes. "Thanks for picking us up, Luke. It's been a long flight."

Y/N could feel the tension crackling in the air, the unspoken words and unresolved issues hanging between them like a thick fog. But for now, she pushed them aside, focusing instead on the feeling of Luke's arms around her and the promise of a few days away from the chaos of her life in New Jersey.

Jack moved forward, his arms open wide and a grin plastered on his face, Y/N felt a flicker of hesitation. There was something about his expression that seemed forced, as if he was trying too hard to appear casual and unaffected by the tension that hung thick in the air.

But before Jack could reach them, Luke's hand shot out, smacking the side of his head with a resounding thwack. The sound echoed through the parking lot, drawing the attention of a few curious onlookers. Jack stumbled back, a bewildered look on his face as he rubbed the spot where Luke's hand had made contact.

"Ow, what was that for?" Jack asked, his voice a mix of surprise and mock indignation. His brows furrowed as he looked at Luke, trying to decipher the reason behind the sudden attack. Y/N could see the gears turning in his head, the confusion and hurt flickering behind his eyes.

Luke lowered his voice, his tone stern yet laced with underlying concern. He leaned in closer to Jack, his eyes locked on his brother's, as if he was trying to convey a message that went beyond words.

"For being an idiot and for bringing her here. Did you forget about what you said on the phone?"

Y/N felt her heart skip a beat, her mind racing with the implications of Luke's words. What had Jack said on the phone? What secrets had he been keeping from her, even as he tried to bridge the gap between them?

Jack's face flushed with guilt, the color rising in his cheeks like a crimson tide. His eyes darted to Y/N, then back to Luke, a silent plea for understanding.

For a moment, no one spoke. Y/N could feel Daphne's eyes on her, could sense the other woman's curiosity and suspicion. But she refused to meet her gaze.

Finally, Luke broke the silence, his voice cutting through the tension like a knife. "Come on," Luke said, releasing Y/N and grabbing her bags. "Mom's waiting at home with lunch. She's been cooking up a storm all morning."

Y/N grinned, the thought of Luke's mother's cooking making her mouth water. "Lead the way," she said, falling into step beside him as they made their way to the car.

As they walked, Y/N could feel Jack's eyes on her back, could sense the weight of his gaze boring into her. But she refused to look back, refused to acknowledge the part of her that still longed for his touch, his presence, his love.

Instead, she focused on the warmth of Luke's hand in hers, on the promise of a few days of respite and healing. And as they drove away from the airport, the skyline of Detroit rising up in the distance, Y/N couldn't help but feel a flicker of hope igniting in her chest.

Maybe, just maybe, this trip would be the start of something new, a chance to leave behind the pain and heartache of the past and find a way forward, one step at a time. And with Luke by her side, and the love of her family to guide her, Y/N knew that anything was possible.

…

Lukes’s car pulled up to the familiar two-story house, Y/N felt a wave of nostalgia wash over her. The red brick facade, the white wooden porch, the sprawling oak tree in the front yard - every detail was exactly as she remembered.

She stepped out of the car, the warm breeze caressing her face and tousling her hair. The scent of freshly cut grass filled the air, a sweet perfume that brought back memories of lazy afternoons spent lounging in the sun and late-night conversations under the stars.

Y/N took a deep breath, letting the peace and tranquility of the moment settle over her like a comforting blanket. For the first time in days, she felt the knots of tension in her shoulders begin to loosen, the weight of her worries and fears slowly melting away.

Beside her, Jack and Daphne were unloading their bags from the trunk, their voices a low murmur against the backdrop of chirping birds and rustling leaves. Y/N hesitated for a moment, her eyes lingering on Jack's face, taking in the lines of stress and fatigue that creased his brow.

In that moment, she made a decision. She was tired of being angry, tired of holding onto the hurt and betrayal that had consumed her for so long. Life was too short to waste on grudges and resentment, too precious to let slip away in a haze of bitterness and regret.

With a determined set to her jaw, Y/N strode over to Jack, her steps purposeful and sure. He looked up as she approached, his eyes widening in surprise and a flicker of hope.

"Hey," she said, her voice soft but steady. "I just wanted to say... I'm sorry for the way I've been acting. I know things have been tough lately, but I don't want to keep dwelling on the past. You're my best friend, Jack, and that's never going to change."

Jack's face softened, his eyes shining with a mix of relief and gratitude. "Y/N, I..." he started, his voice thick with emotion. "I'm sorry too. For everything. I never meant to hurt you, and I know I have a lot to make up for. But I'm willing to do whatever it takes to earn your trust again."

Y/N felt a lump form in her throat, the sincerity in Jack's words tugging at her heartstrings. She reached out and took his hand, giving it a gentle squeeze.

"I know," she said, a small smile tugging at the corners of her lips. "let's just focus on enjoying this trip and being there for each other, okay?"

Jack nodded, his own smile breaking through the clouds of tension that had hung over them for so long. "Okay," he said, his voice filled with a tentative hope. "That sounds perfect."

Together, they made their way up the porch steps, their hands still intertwined. Y/N could feel the warmth of Jack's skin against her own.

"Welcome back, sweetheart," Ellen said, her voice warm and rich like honey. "We've missed you so much."

Y/N felt tears prick at the corners of her eyes. “I've missed you too," she said, her voice muffled against the older woman's shoulder. "It's so good to be home."

…

Luke led Daphne and Y/N up the stairs, their footsteps echoing on the hardwood, Jack seized the opportunity to pull his mother aside. His heart raced, palms sweaty as he glanced nervously between her and the staircase, his body practically vibrating with anxiety.

Ellen's brows furrowed, her maternal instincts kicking into high gear as she sensed her son's distress. She placed a gentle hand on his arm, her touch a silent invitation to share his troubles.

"Jack, honey, what's wrong?" she asked, her voice soft and filled with concern. "You look like you've seen a ghost."

Jack swallowed hard, his Adam's apple bobbing in his throat. He ran a shaky hand through his hair, his eyes darting around the room as if searching for an escape. But there was none to be found, and he knew that he owed his mother the truth.

With a heavy sigh, he guided her to the couch, his movements stiff and awkward. They sat down, the worn cushions sinking beneath their weight, and for a moment, neither of them spoke.

Finally, Jack broke the silence, his voice barely above a whisper. "Mom, I... I messed up. Y/N and I, we had a fight. A big one. And I don't know how to fix it."

Ellen's eyes widened, a flicker of disappointment crossing her face. But she remained silent, allowing her son to continue.

"I didn't tell her about Daphne, and she found out in the worst way possible. And now... now she can barely look at me. I don't know what to do, Mom. I can't lose her."

Jack's voice cracked, the tears he had been holding back for so long finally spilling over. He buried his face in his hands, his shoulders shaking with the force of his sobs.

Ellen's heart ached for her son, for the pain and regret that radiated off him in waves. She reached out and pulled him into a hug, her arms wrapping around him like a protective cocoon.

"Oh, Jack," she murmured, her voice filled with a mix of sympathy and gentle chastisement. "I know it's hard, but you have to be honest with the people you love. Secrets have a way of coming out, and they always hurt more in the end."

Jack nodded, his face still buried in his mother's shoulder. "I know," he said, his voice muffled by the fabric of her shirt.

"I just... I didn't want to hurt her. But I ended up doing exactly that." Ellen pulled back, her hands coming up to cup Jack's face. She looked him in the eye, her gaze filled with a wisdom born of years of love and experience.

"Do you remember the time that boy was bothering Y/N in school?" she asked, her voice soft and reminiscent. "You came home with a black eye and a split lip, but you were so proud of yourself for defending her."

Jack's lips twitched, a hint of a smile breaking through the tears. "Yeah, I remember. She was so upset, but I just wanted to make her feel safe."

Ellen nodded, her own smile mirroring her son's. "You brought her back here, to this very house. And you let her lay her head on your lap, and you caressed her hair until she fell asleep. Do you remember what I told you then?"

Jack's brow furrowed, his mind stretching back to that distant memory. "You said... you said that love is the most pure thing you can feel."

Ellen nodded, a knowing smile playing at the corners of her lips. "And I see it in you, Jack. When you look at her. You love her, don't you?"

Jack took a deep breath, his shoulders straightening his heart skipping a beat at his mother's words. He had always known, deep down, that his feelings for Y/N went beyond friendship. But to hear it spoken aloud, to have his deepest secret laid bare... it was both terrifying and exhilarating.

"I... I don't know what to say, Mom," he stammered, his cheeks flushing with a mix of embarrassment and longing. "Y/N and I, we're just friends. And besides, Daphne...” He trailed off, his eyes flickering towards the staircase where his ex-girlfriend had disappeared just moments before.

Ellen sighed "Jack, honey, the longer you wait, the harder it's going to be. Sooner or later, you're going to decide whether you want to be with her in that way or let her go and find love in someone else.”

Jack stood up, his heart lighter than it had been in days. He hugged his mother one last time, breathing in the comforting scent of her perfume. "You're right, Mom. I need to be honest with myself, and with Y/N. But... but I can't do it now. Not with Daphne here. It wouldn't be fair to anyone."

"Ellen patted his cheek, her touch a silent benediction. "I understand, sweetheart. But don't wait too long, okay?

…

Tag List <3

@favsrachz @jacktoria4ever @bunbunbl0gs @ivy-34 @rebelatbay @bxtchopolis

[wave2tyun]

pillow talk

pairing: taehyun x reader

genre: suggestive?? it's nothing explicit but i wouldn't call it fluff either cause it's just a makeout sbdsbshd

summary: more taehyun brainrot (i'm insane.)

warnings: none<3

word count: 0.6k

a/n: here it is, just as promised!!!!😼😼💖 sorry if it seems like i've been spamming lately- i'm gonna go back to uni in less than a week so i'm kinda trying to make the most out of my free time until then sadbahjb cause i don't know how active i'll be after that :( also this is completely off topic but i JUST found out the game burger shop 3 has been released.........it's downloading right as i'm typing this.....guess i might be busy over the next few hours

his hands were all over you- coming from cradling your hips to stroking down the skin of your thighs, gently gripping the muscle as he further immersed himself in the feeling of your lips on his. he couldn’t get enough of it- having you tangled up in his sheets every night, with no other priority on his mind besides losing yourself in your warm embrace.

parting slightly, you lingered with your lips hanging open, still touching against his, yet not returning to closing the space.

“wanna go slow?”

taehyun’s eyes were still closed as he heavily exhaled, answering you.

“don’t be a tease, sweetheart”

but he waited patiently, caressing the curves of your hips, hair already a ruffled mess. your fingertips traced the outline of his lips slowly, in an almost tantalizing manner.

switching to lean in closer, you pressed a peck so quick it could barely be called a kiss before you nibbled on his lower lip, provoking him further with your tongue as you lightly brushed it over his lips, yet not turning to do anything more.

“just kiss me” he groaned, at which you let out a small laugh.

taehyun felt his cheeks go red, it wasn’t usual for him to act with such transparent greed. his desire was beginning to feel insatiable- it was a struggle to contain it.

“you’re too impatient-” you began to mutter, but taehyun reconnected his lips with yours, kissing you right through your words.

that tenderness of yours- it was such sweet agony feeling you touch him so slow, teasing the fiery longing burning within him. who would have thought that a mere two centimeters could be so maddening?

now that he had convinced you to give in again, he cupped your face, holding you close. his lips moved against yours in a slower rhythm than before, taking his time to feel you, to pleasure you, careful so that you wouldn’t pull away again and leave him hot and heavy chasing after you. he turned further into a mess the more you bit his lips, the more your tongue glided past his, the more he felt the heat of your mouth.

out of breath, you pressed your forehead to his for a few moments before moving to graze his jawline with your lips. you dipped your head down to reach his neck, all while your left hand caressed the skin along his nape, switching between lightly scratching with your nails against his scalp, and tugging at his hair.

the more you nipped at his neck, the more he felt himself becoming slightly feverish; low hums and soft praises escaping whenever you took your time biting down a certain spot.

“fuck- do that again” the words escaped in a mellow tone.

“do you like it?” you asked teasingly, pausing your movements.

“don’t stop” he pleaded urgently. it’s not just that he wanted more- he needed more. he needed to feel you closer, to feel the heat from your lips completely coating his body, settling and nibbling on his bare skin.

“keep going, baby” he urged you on.

his chest heaved underneath you, and you could feel his heart thump in expectation. he couldn’t just stay still, his fingers were brushing over the expanse of your back, roaming around your shoulder blades then down your spine, and coming to settle on your waist underneath your shirt. in a mixture of desire and anticipation, he threw his hair back, releasing a soft sigh- no matter how much your lips brushed over his, no matter how many times you explored his body, he could never cease craving more of your touch.

taglist: @huekalover3000

[blazewrites-smut]

Kinktober Day 6: Overstimulation | TFA Blurr

Day 6: Overstimulation (TFA Blurr)

Interfacing with Blurr was no easy feat. You may be asking why. Why is it not easy? Was he not a good lover?

He was a wonderful lover, he made you feel amazing. Except for when he got too into it. He could make you overstimulated easily due to his fast pace and the fact he could go incredible speeds. This was like one of those scenarios. Currently you had Blurr below you, riding him as he laid beneath you. His servos ran along your thighs while he garbled nonsense as his hips roughly and quickly thrust up into you desperately. He wanted you so badly and wanted to overload within your heated valve.

You moan from the feeling of having overloaded a few times already. Your valve ached from overstimulation and you struggled to stay upright while your mech eagerly thrusts inside of you. "B-Blurr!" You gasp. "Slow down." You beg to him.

"I'msorryY/N,I can'tslowdown!" He speaks quickly as he holds you closer to him as he thrusts hard up into you and grind down onto his lap as his lengthy spike hit your chamber over and over, making you vocally express your pleasure each time. He felt so good, his spike speared you open and thrusts eagerly.

"Blurr, please! I'm begging you, slow down!" You cry out, your spike is grabbed by Blurr and quickly jerked off as he can feel you get close to your end once again. You've lost count but Blurr was enjoying this. It was a pleasure to watch you go insane from his fragging. Seeing you get all worked up and pleasured by him. He loved watching you. Your expressions, your cure little spike bobbing and twitching as each overload left you shaking and throbbing.

It was worth it though. Spending very little time on his own pleasure, and focusing on yours. Blurr enjoyed watching you overload each time. Your pleasure was his. And even as you finished yet another overload, he didn't stop. You never said the safe word, meaning you were far from being done. Your valve was so deliciously tight and the way it throbbed and clenched as each overload left you drooling and begging for more.

Oh how he loved you~

(Sorry for another short one, I promise they will be longer in the next couple ones to come.)

[thedamselzelda]

Italian Dreams Ripped At The Seams

Author Chat: The first "chapter" of whatever I'm going to name this series. I'm not entirely sure yet, haven't settled on a name. BUT I have been DYING to post and get the ball rolling. I am in nursing school and I am writing almost everyday when I get home. the ideas are within my notes app, it's just the struggle of sitting down to do it.

Featuring: DarkEra! Dazai Osamu

Summary: Silence, it's something to fear in an already unstable world. In yours, it could mean anything. Your thoughts race as you think to yourself what the silence, the lack of communication, could actually mean, especially when that silence is caused by Dazai.

word count: 3k, fem!reader, pm!reader, sfw (light cursing), reader is occasionally called "Izanami" a nickname given to her bc of her ability (I'll let you try to figure that one out, until then stay tuned), reader is described as having violet eyes bc of her father (mentioned within this chapter) warnings: mentioned of self-harm, suicide attempt

The ceiling of the Italian Villa’s on-suite bathroom was one that could rival the Sistine Chapel ceiling, or at least, you think so. You’d never actually been or had even thought about it while living your life in Yokohama. Perhaps, now with your excruciatingly long stay in Italy, you would find yourself wandering into the building to admire another country’s history and artwork. 

But that is not why you were staring at the ceiling, instead you were mulling through your thoughts of the past week or so. The shortened phone calls, now completely devoid of them, between you and… well he wasn’t exactly your boyfriend. Or was he? You two had openly expressed your feelings, you two fucked around without a care, but was he even exclusively yours?

You scrunched your nose at the thought. That wasn’t exactly the part that irked you. What bothered you was that he had abruptly stopped calling and sending his sweet letters to you six months into your “study abroad” trip that Mori had all but shoved you out for. He was always honest with you, and you with him, so what would change his perception of you now? Was he tired of you? Was he simply that bothered by your leave that distance does not, in fact, make the heart grow fonder?

You splashed more water onto your chest, resting in the warm bath, hoping it would alleviate the migraine that had accumulated while working today. Your last phone call with him wasn’t long enough. It was so short you could remember every syllable that fell from his lips.

“Mori gave him the Silver Oracle, but of course I told him I’d help him even without it.”

“Well, you’re his friend. Did he not believe you?” You brushed your hair, hoping the smell of formaldehyde had been washed away with your evening shower.

“You know he did, but I could still hear some reservations when I spoke to him. Also, you really gotta talk to him about his ‘no killing’ policy.”

You breathe out a laugh, “Look, he’s been wanting me to read those books for the longest. His mantra is his. I’m just gonna let him do him.”

Dazai sighed, knowing far too well that even if your friendship with Oda rivaled that of his, not even you could persuade him. “Oh, I also had to work with your fath- I mean, Hirotsu. I tossed him my game and he totally fucked up my win streak.”

Your eyebrow twitched at hearing the intentional mess up. “Osamu, just commit to the bit next time. Also, why would you even toss your game to him.”

 Dazai chucked on the other side of the receiver, “I had work to do.”

“Oh yes, big mister executive had to go clean up my father’s mess. I see.”

You didn’t hear anything from him for a moment. You knew he was smiling, but it was a solemn one. He knew how much you wanted to be executive. You were born into the mafia, he wasn’t. While it wasn’t technically a birthright, the two of you felt like it was meant to be yours. Pushing back to the previous topic, you spoke again.

“Tell Oda that I’m looking forward to getting a letter from him. He didn’t pick up the phone the last time I called, but it sounds like he’s quite busy with whatever Mori has tasked him with.”

Dazai hummed to you in response, picking his next words carefully. Slipping into rough Italian, as if he couldn’t let anyone know, and spoke, “I’m worried about him.”

Your mouth curled into a frown, placing the brush down on the vanity. You picked your phone up, taking it off speaker, and placing it to your ear.

“How so?” you reply back, your Italian just as rough.

“He’s…” You could tell Dazai hadn’t had as much experience in the language, having only learned it to speak with you while you were in Italy. It was much more help than he could realize, as you were barely able to converse with your mentor, with your native tongue being Japanese and only knowing basic English. Dazai attempted to keep speaking, “He’s up against a skill rival to his. I just don’t foresee any outcome with this group going well.”

You hum back to him this time, unsure of what to say. You had heard through your contacts about this rival group, Mimic. Now, they had taken Ango, one of Dazai’s friends, your acquaintance. You knew dealing with any foreign group such as this always resulted in death, something you were intimately familiar with, so the thought didn’t plague you too much. Rather, the tone of Dazai’s voice and his words meant that it was Oda who could be the one at the center.

You cease speaking Italian, “I’m sure, whatever the outcome, the four of us will end up at Bar Lupin, clinking our drinks together and laughing about all of this in…” You think to yourself how much longer this sentence is, “three and a half years?”

Dazai puffs into the receiver, whining, “That’s too far from now. I’m gonna have to tell Mori I require a much-needed vacation to Italy real soon.”

You laugh, flopping down onto your down bed with satin sheets, “I would like that very much.”

The two of you fall silent, your eyes growing heavier and heavier. The silence was common toward the end of your phone calls. Sometimes, you could swear he would stay on just to hear the sound of your soft breathing. You would have, if that insomniac would ever fall asleep. 

“Bella, you can go to sleep. You’ll get my letter tomorrow. Just imagine I’m reading it to you.”

“It’s not the saammme.” You groan, throwing your arm over your eyes. “I get why Mori would send me here but fuck for four years?! I would serve the organization better if I was there!”

Dazai was silent, almost as if he didn’t want to agree or disagree with your statement.

“He said it was to hone your ability now that he couldn’t focus on you anymore, so I suppose it’s for the Mafia’s benefit more so than yours. You know where I stand regardless.”

“I know.” You voice was light, emphasizing your feelings.

“I’ll be the one that picks you up from the airport, though. I’ll even sweep you up and spin you around if it gives you something to look forward to.”

You roll over, smiling into your pillow.

“You’re definitely going to be dreaming about that now.” He laughs, possibly daydreaming about it already himself.

You chuckle, smothering your flushed face.

“Get some rest, cara mia. I’ll talk to you again in a few days.” His voice was soothing and low in tone, as if he knew his voice was lulling you to sleep.

“Talk to you soon, mon cher.” You sleepily say, waiting for him to end the call-but he doesn’t. You knew he was waiting for you to fall asleep, your eyes closing until you found yourself opening them again in the morning.

You open your eyes once more gazing upon the painted ceiling above you. It had been a week since then, placing you back into your thoughts on why he hadn’t called, written, or at least attempted to contact you in some other form. Even Oda and Mori hadn’t spoken to you. Which placed you in even more confusing thoughts. Surely, you thought to yourself, surely Mori wasn’t eliminating you from the Mafia. If that were the case, you would have already been killed and disposed of, and the mistress of the Villa, nor your mentor were acting anything out of the normal.

You gaze down, pinching the bridge of your nose. Any more thinking on this topic and surely your head would explode, which would be an invited reprieve at this particular moment. Your eyes dance down to the water, noticing your scar, which was deformed by the refracting water. One on your arm, you reached over to touch, remembering how you and Dazai had taken a knife across your arms hoping for it to be a beautiful double suicide, but alas, Mori found the two of you. He stitched up Dazai, forcing you to stitch up your own wound. You could feel a tear breech and slide down your cheek.

The great Izanami does not cry.

You grab onto the porcelain tub, pressing yourself deeper into the water, forcing your neck, then your face into the water. You open your eyes underneath the water, holding yourself there. Perhaps, if Dazai is done with you-if Oda is done with you-then maybe this is how you should go. You release some air from your lungs, allowing you to sink further under the water. You release your hands from the sides, submerging them, too.

Your lungs begin to burn, screaming for you to go up for air, but you refuse. You blink as you hear a garbled voice within the bathroom. If it is the mistress, there was nothing she could do to stop you. One touch and she would be gone. She knew the rule when it came to you. You blink again, seeing a dark outlined figure standing above the tub. You think to yourself, maybe it is him. However, if it is, he would have already pulled you up. So, it couldn’t be.

You find yourself gasping at fresh air as someone pulls you up from behind, their small hands snaking under your arms.

“Honestly, could you please not kill yourself? I’ve invested too much into you.”

You blink as your eyes burned slightly from the water falling from your lashes. A hand towel is handed to you, and you wipe your face roughly before looking behind you.

“Thank you, Elise.” Mori says sweetly to the girl. She rolls her eyes at you, annoyed that she had to soak her dress to retrieve you.

“What are you doing here?” You say in a harsh tone, irritated that he has interrupted yet another attempt.

“I can come and go as I please, since I am the one funding this education of yours.” His voice returns to the irritated, tired tone that he always uses with you. He’s taken a seat at the chair beside the tub, placing a medium navy-blue box tied in gold ribbon on the side table along with a tan file folder.

“I haven’t heard from you in a week. So, I ask again, what are you doing here?” You become irritated by his intrusion, and deviation from your original question.

You sit up within the tub, not caring for his gaze upon you. He was your technical guardian after all, and you knew his interest in young girls. However, you were unbothered by his now as you neared adulthood, his interest had wavered in you increasingly. The only thing that bound the two of you now was his ownership of you and your ability.

“I suppose you were going about your days here in the villa, wondering what the outcome was with Mimic, since I suppose he told you a bit about the issue.”

Mori was visibly irritated, testing to see how much Dazai told you via your late-night calls. The two of you knew it was very risky to converse about such delicate matters, regardless of what form they were put into. However, you longed to be home, so Dazai had frequently indulged you.

“I just know Oda was involved. That’s all.” You tone was steady, you had lied to Mori countless times before, this time was evidently no different.

He arched his eyebrow, studying your face. “It doesn’t matter now. It’s resolved anyway. We got the permit.”

He closed his eyes in thought. You in turn began to study him, curious as to why he would come to the villa just to inform you of the Port Mafia’s success.

“That can’t be the only reason you’re here.” You turn in the tub, your legs folding into your chest as you cock your head. “To what to I truly owe this intrusion, Mori?”

He slowly opened his eyes to look at you. His eyes darted between your violet ones, formulating his next words. “Sakunosuke Oda unfortunately passed during the fight against Mimic.”

Your eyes widen as you lean forward. You breathe out the only word that can formulate against your thoughts. A broken, “No,” escaping your lips.

Mori closes his eyes once more, leaning his head forward slightly, “And Dazai has disappeared. We do not know his whereabouts.”

“What?!” You spring up from the tub, water splashing about the floor and onto Elise and Mori. Elise groans, reaching for a bigger towel and tossing it to you. You wrap it around your body, attempting to create your next sentence against your pounding headache. “No, he… he would have said something. He would have contacted me. He wouldn’t…”

Your words trailed off as if they couldn’t follow your thoughts.

“Therefore, I came here because you needed to be informed of your new position. Or rather, the one you will take on once you finish here in Italy.”

You could barely hear him over your last conversation with Dazai playing out once more in your head.

"I’ll talk to you again in a few days… You’ll get my letter tomorrow.”

You hadn’t actually received the letter, which is what triggered your incessant thoughts. You had gone up to the mistress, day after day, asking if the letter had arrived, yet nothing came.

“While I am completely optimistic that Dazai will return.” Your eyes narrowed, anger seething from your gritted teeth. “I am leaving his executive position open for his return. In the meantime, you will assume a specially made executive position, and I have the documents to a club and a casino I would like for you to have control over to start with.”

He tapped to the file next to the navy-blue box.

“What’s the box for then?” Your eyes glance to the beautifully decorated box, curious to what could be contained within it.

“Dazai passed it to me a few days before he left, wanted me to send it to you. Instead, I thought it would soften the blow of the pervious news.” His hand fanned over the box in a presenting motion. “It’s been screened of course. Couldn’t have a defected member sending you something that would cause my newest executive to defect too.”

He gave a sly smile. He knew of your relationship with Dazai, but he also knew you feared a life without the Mafia more.

You sneered at him, “Why would I want that from a defected member?”

Your words were merely show, something to appease Mori since you had just been given your prize, however, it wasn’t for all your hard work of the past years. Rather, it was desperation on Mori’s part to hold you closer within his clutches.

“My, my… I didn’t expect you to be so cold when it comes to Dazai.” Mori stood chuckling but leaving the box behind anyway.

He began to walk toward the closed bathroom door, Elise opening it to escape the humid air within the room. He turned on his heel, however, before breeching back into your private room.

“I expect greatness from you, Izanami. Do not fail me.” It echoed within your head as more of an order, rather than a statement.

You emit a low growl at the name, hating to hear it from him of all Mafia members.

He smiled, pleased by your response, and closed the door behind him.

You wait for a moment, listening for the next click of the door being closed. Once you heard the faint noise of Mori’s departure, you scrambled, nearly slipping, from the tub. You grabbed the plush robe from the chair, donning it instead of the towel you had been holding up. Once you had tied the robe, you tear the gold ribbon from the box, haphazardly letting it flutter to the floor. Your hands hesitate with the lid. What if he knew he was leaving? What if…?

You sit down in the chair, placing the heavy midnight box within your lap. You take a deep breath, lifting the lid and placing it upon the file. Your fingers gingerly graze the gray tissue covering the contents, trembling. You notice a splash of darkness appearing on the gray paper. You harshly rub the remaining tears from your cheeks.

Why are you so afraid to look? To see the last thing he’s left you? Because it’s the last. There is no more Dazai. He’s dead as far as the, now, executive you are concerned, but the young girl in you? The one who’s lost the one person on this God-forsaken earth that could touch you without consequence? She was afraid.

You began to peel back the tissue paper, first noticing the maroon color peeking out within the box. Your finger grazed upon the soft material as you remove the right covering paper. Your fingers go to touch your lips, a small choking gasp escaping through them as your tears now forcefully fall from your eyes. It was a scarf he had bought because you had remarked how it complemented his eyes, yet he could never bring himself to wear it, stating it reminded him too much of Mori. You attempted to pick it up from within the box, but you discovered the additional contents that had been wrapped within. Three books, all too familiar to you shifted underneath the scarf. You could hear yourself begin to sob as you picked up the last remaining things of Oda’s clutching the items to your chest. You pressed your face into the scarf, hoping to find some comfort, smelling burnt gunpowder and a faint woody scent, reminiscent of him. 

You could barely see through your tears, almost missing the final present that graced you.

In Italian, evident that he attempted way too many times to write the note, Happy Birthday, Bella. All my love. ~O <3

~ next

If I forgot to tag anything, or forgot to mention anything in the warnings, please let me know! I'm still just trying to figure all this out after using Wattpad for so long.

Thank you to everyone who reads this though! Hope you enjoy and look forward to what's to come!

[imagine-a-life-like-this]

Step 4 : Date Other People (B.C)

Word Count : 4.9k

Warnings : swearing, food mention, being stood up, hurt, like a lot of hurt, like honestly so much hurt (i'm sorry), briefest mention of sex, again they're both idiots (happy ending i promise)

Being with Chan was easy. It was effortless. Like she was born to be by his side. Being in love can feel like that sometimes. Like you’re born to be with that person, to love that person. No matter what they do, no matter how far away, the love never fades. An unconditional love; that’s the kind of love she has for Chan.

            So why was she sat across from someone else enjoying a romantic dinner? Listening to him drone on and on about a story she stopped listening to five minutes ago. Counting the seconds as they pass, wondering when the date would come to an end. She couldn’t even remember his name, knowing him from class but nothing more. She’s not even sure she’s seen him outside class before this, as if he only existed within those four walls. Like an NPC.

            It was never going to go anywhere and she knew that from the moment he asked her out. He wasn’t the one she wanted to be sat across from. She knows who she wants to sit across from, knows who she wants to listen to talk about his day, but she can’t have him.

            Bang Chan. Her best friend. Someone she never meant to fall in love with. Her feelings were never meant to grow passed platonic love. But it was impossible not to fall in love with Chan.

            From day one she knew he was going to be special to her. Come sit with me. Waving her over with his dimpled smile, taking her under his wing like they’d known each other forever. She leaned on him and he let her, holding her up whenever she couldn’t do it herself. He was just so kind, so smart, so giving. Just so wonderfully Chan.

            She should have known she was going to fall in love with him. Should have known he was never going to be just a friend. But she deluded herself into thinking that she could stay by his side and never want something more than friendship. Deluded herself into thinking she would never fall in love with someone so perfect.

            “Did you want dessert?” The guy asked her, pulling her away from her thoughts. She noticed him looking through the dessert menu, glancing up at her every once in a while.

            He was handsome, there was no denying that. Tall and muscular with a face that looked like it was carved by the gods. She could tell that he was kind by the way he’s treated her on the date, and even before. Girls were envious when he asked her out, and she could see why. He was a well desired man, and rightfully so.

            But he wasn’t Chan.

            “I’m actually really full.” She answered him politely, hoping he’d get the hint that she just wanted to go home. It was obvious that she wasn’t interested, and she knew that. She knew that everyone could see that he was having more fun than she was, and it had nothing to do with him as a person. Had her heart not already belonged to someone else, she could see herself liking him.

            But he wasn’t Chan. No one would ever measure up.

            “Really? You barely touched your dinner.” He chuckled, placing the menu on the table. She just awkwardly shrugged her shoulders, faking the nicest smile she could. He was a nice guy, a really nice guy, but she just couldn’t stop thinking about Chan. “I’ll pay the bill and drive you home.” He knew.

~

            Chan wasn’t home when she walked through the door to their shared apartment, not that she expected him to be. He told her that he’s had more inspiration than usual, holing himself up in his rented studio just off campus for hours on end.

            It never occurred to her that he was lying to her. That he was struggling to write anything that wasn’t related to her. All the songs he’s written in the passed month sounded the same. About a boy in love with his best friend, watching her fall in love with someone else. Longing for her to look at him just once, see the love he’s willing to give. Watching her slowly slip through his fingers, too scared to hold on, scared to hold her back.

            He knew she would be getting home from yet another date. She would kick her shoes off, have a shower, wash off any remnants of the date she just had, change into shorts and a t-shirt she would steal from his closet, and wait for him. How he wishes she would just go to bed. Seeing her curled up on the couch, reading a book or watching a movie, wearing his t-shirt, had him dreaming of a universe where she was his. A universe where he could walk over to where she was sitting and wrap his arms around her, pressing kisses to her face as he softly tells her how much he loves her.

            But she’s not his. Not the way that he’s hers. His heart, his soul, everything that he is belongs to her. “Go home hyung. Confess to her and make her your girlfriend already.” Changbin looked at him, his arms crossed over his chest.

            “She went on another date today.” Changbin’s arms fell to his sides as he watched his friend crumble in front of him. How were his two friends so unaware of the other’s obvious feelings? Everyone around them could see how in love with each other they are, but both of them are blind.

            “Is it a second date?” Changbin knew the answer already. Y/n had gained a reputation over the passed month. Known for her many first dates but never a second. Friends knew it was due to her feelings for Chan, but strangers, onlookers, anyone that didn’t know her, wondered if there was something wrong with her. If she was stuck up, felt like no one was good enough for her.

            “No.” It was the obvious answer. An answer everyone knew. No one would be good enough for a second date. No one but Chan.

            “Then you still have a chance.” Changbin clapped him on the shoulder as he spoke, giving his friend an encouraging smile. But Chan just shook his head.

            “I’d rather keep our friendship the way it is.”

~

            “I heard the new guy wants to ask you out.” Lisa giggled, bumping her shoulder against Y/n’s. Y/n looked towards the desk where Seokmin was handing another group of teenagers their bowling shoes. The girls he was helping started giggling when he smiled at them.

            The bowling alley she worked at got busier once word got around about the cute new guy working the front desk. Wait times escalated more and more each day. Going from 10 minutes to over an hour, but no one minded waiting when Seokmin stood at the front counter.

            They’ve been working together less than two weeks, speaking barely 10 words to each other within that time. She found it near impossible that he’d be thinking about asking her out, especially with the reputation she gained trying to get over Chan. He heard it, she knows that. Everyone heard it. It didn’t bother her as much as she thought it would. Reputations come and go, and this one will disappear one day too.

            “He’s cute, he’s smart, he’s nice, he’s funny. What more could you want in a guy?” Rose chimed in, throwing her arm across Y/n’s shoulders, but she quickly shrugged her off. Seokmin was perfect in theory, but he’s not Chan.

            He’s just another guy that would be a failed distraction. Another guy she could fall for had she not fallen for her best friend. And she knows she’ll have to let go of the love she has for him, knows he’ll fall for a perfect girl, someone that will make him feel what he makes her feel. Maybe by then someone else would have come along, swept her off her feet before she even realized it.

            It’s possible that it could be Seokmin. With his perfect smile and contagious laugh. But it’s not the right time. Not while Chan is still single. Not while her heart is hanging onto the slim chance that Chan could love her too.

            “If you think he’s so great, why don’t you go for it?” Seokmin looked towards them, shooting them his infamous smile that had hundreds of other girls falling at his feet. But she just turned away, continuing to pretend she was busy behind the food counter despite not a single person ordering.

            “Because he can’t stop talking about you.” Rose teased. “Maybe he’ll be the one to get that second date.”

            “Oh please. Everyone knows the only guy that will ever get a second date with her is Chan.”

            “What do you want, Jungkook?” Y/n asked. He leaned on the counter as he tried out yet another pick up line on her, something he started doing just to annoy her. “Either order something to eat or go back to work.”

            “So harsh baby. I’ll just get my usual.”

            “You’re lucky I like you or I would have gotten you fired weeks ago.” She said with a chuckle before shouting his order to the chef in the kitchen.

            “You know that Hoseok is soft for him. He’d never fire Jungkook.” Lisa laughed. “Lucky bastard.” Jungkook shot the three a wink before asking if they could deliver the food to the bar for him when it’s ready.

~

            “Oh before I forget. Y/n, I need you to pick up some extra shifts until I can hire some new staff. Seokmin needs some help at the counter.” Hoseok said as Y/n was grabbing her things to leave. “It’ll probably only be a week or two.”

            “Yeah that’s no problem. I could use the extra cash anyway.”

            “All those first dates putting you out?” He joked.

            “Bold of you to assume I pay on the first date.” She winked at him before leaving, Jungkook waiting outside the front door for her.

            “Either you need to grab your shit faster or get someone else to drive you home.” Jungkook teased. “I have a life outside of you, you know.” Despite his teasing words, he still opened the passenger side door for her just as he always did. Allowed her to pick the music and listened to her sing all the songs off key, just like he always did.

            “Do you think I’ll ever get over Chan?” They were sat outside her apartment building. She could see the lights on in the apartment she shares with Chan, meaning not only was he home, he was awake. Jungkook glanced over to her, seeing the distant look in her eyes, and immediately knew that her feelings were drowning her.

            Everyone talks about the beauty of love. The soft glances and lovesick smiles. Date nights that end with a goodnight kiss. Whispered promises of forever and collages of memories posted everywhere. Lingering touches that bring butterflies and calm at the same time. Kisses that leave you breathless and begging for more. Love is addicting.

            But it’s not always beautiful. It’s pain. It’s suffocating. Like thinking you’re lost at sea only to see an island not too far, but too far out of reach. Almost close enough to touch, but then waves take you farther away and then it’s gone. Left for someone else to find.

            It’s watching the one you love, fall in love with someone else. Feeling the ache become a dull pain that you learn to ignore. Wanting to scream your declaration of love at the top of your lungs, but nothing comes out.

            “What if he loves you too?” She looks at Jungkook and he wipes away her tears. It’s a question she’s wondered for weeks, months. Kept awake at night, tossing and turning, knowing the answer was in the next room over. All the what ifs and maybes cross her mind.

            Maybe his newest love song was written for her. Maybe he dreams of holding her too. Maybe he looks at her and sees forever. And it all boils down to one question. What if he loves you too?

            “What if he doesn’t?”

~

            “Hungry?” Chan asked as she shuffled into the kitchen the next morning. Her hair was stuck up in a million different directions thanks to the tossing and turning that kept her up all night. But he found it endearing, wanting nothing more than for her to wrap her arms around him as he smooths her hair, pressing his lips to the top of her head when he’s finished. But friends don’t do that.

            “Starving.” She smiled at him and his entire world stopped for a second. He loved when she smiled at him, allowing him to believe it was a smile just for him. “Hoseok needs me to work some extra shifts for a week or two. So I’ll be home late.”

            Chan had heard of the cute new guy at her work. How seemingly perfect he was. How busy it had gotten because of him. Overheard Lisa talking to her friends about how all the girls at the bowling alley, workers, and customer alike, were fawning over him. And he wonders if Y/n is one of them.

            It plagued his mind, took over his writing. The very idea of her giggling while talking to him, tucking hair behind her ear as she smiles at him. He’s been waiting for her to come home, a lovesick smile on her face as she talks about the cute new guy at her job. Maybe that will give him the kick in the ass that he needs to leave his feelings behind.

            “Call if you need me to pick you up.” He answered her, placing a plate of food in front of her. “Eat fast or you’ll be late.”

~

            She stood behind the counter next to Seokmin. Her smile was bright and beautiful; the same smile she gives Chan every morning when he cooks her breakfast. The same smile he deluded himself into thinking was meant just for him, but he can see now that her smile was never meant for him.

            Over the week working alongside Seokmin, she got to know him. Talk to him, laugh with him. He really was perfect in theory, someone that wouldn’t have a hard time stealing someone’s heart. As they helped customers together, he would make her laugh. Make it feel like they were just friends hanging out, the hours passing by so quickly.

            She watched as girls fawned over him, batting their eyelashes, flipping their hair, begging for his attention. He would shoot them his infamous smile, hand them their shoes, and move on to the next group of giggling girls. It was entertaining.

            Her smile faltered for just a second when her eyes met her best friend’s, before she regained her composure, smiling at him like she smiled at the others. She tried to ignore his arm wrapped around the girl beside him. Tried to ignore her lovesick smile as she looked at Chan, leaning into his touch.

            She tried her best to treat them like every other customer, like her heart wasn’t breaking, like she wasn’t holding back her tears. “Hey, you okay? You look sick.” Seokmin asked as Chan walked away with his date.

            It was bound to happen. But she had hoped she had more time. More time to find someone to distract her from her feelings for him. More time to fall for someone else. More time to prepare herself for the inevitable heartbreak of seeing him fall for someone that wasn’t her.

            She wonders if all those late nights at the studio, were lies. If he was with her, holding her in his arms, kissing her, fucking her. Were all the love songs he’s shown her recently about this girl he never told her about? “I just need to use the bathroom. I’ll be right back.”

            Jungkook watched her from the bar as she made her way to the bathroom, a distant look in her eyes. And he knew why. He could see Chan from where he stood. Watching as he helped the girl put her shoes on. “Go help her, you idiot.” Taehyung pushed him out of the bar and towards the employee bathroom. “This is your chance.”

            He shook his head because he knew he didn’t stand a chance against Chan. Even in a world where Chan was taken, she would never look at him. But he wasn’t going to let her cry alone in a shitty employee bathroom. He wasn’t going to watch as she tried to keep herself together as if she wasn’t hurting. He would sit in that bathroom with her, lend her his shoulder, and allow her to hurt.

            “Y/n.” He said softly after knocking on the door. “I know you’re not peeing. Just let me in.” The door opened just a crack and he could see the tears she allowed to fall in the safety of the locked bathroom. He pushed his way in, locking the door behind him, before taking her into his arms.

            “Why did he have to bring her here?” She whispered between her sobs. Jungkook wondered the same thing. And he began to think he had Chan all wrong. Maybe he didn’t return Y/n’s feelings after all.

            “Grab your stuff. I’ll take you home now. Hoseok will understand.” He didn’t give her a chance to protest, holding her face in his hands, wiping away her tears with his thumbs. And as she looks up at him, her nose red, tears still welling up in her eyes, her lips jutted out in the cutest pout, he wonders how Chan couldn’t be in love with her.

            “Can I stay with you?” How could he say no?

~

            Chan drove the girl home, wishing her a goodnight as she slowly took her seatbelt off, asking if he’d like to go upstairs with her. An offer he politely declined. She nodded, taking the clear hint that he wasn’t interested in her.

            It was obvious in the way he looked at the girl behind the counter at the bowling alley. In the way he watched as she left under the arm of another guy, a distance in his eyes for the rest of the night. He tried to seem interested, smiling at her, paying for everything. But he didn’t look at her. Not the way he looked at his best friend.

            “You shouldn’t agree to go out with someone if you have feelings for someone else. It’s not fair to anyone involved.” She told him with a sad smile and got out of his car without waiting for a reply.

            She was right. Chan knew that. But when she approached him with a hopeful look in her eyes, asking him to go bowling with her that night, he felt like it was an opportunity handed to him on a golden platter. An opportunity to see the guy that could possibly steal Y/n’s heart. An opportunity to find someone to help him move on.

            But instead he watched as she left with Jungkook, holding onto him like he was her lifeline. Changbin had been telling him that maybe the reason she never agrees to a second date is because she’s waiting for the one she likes to ask her out, giving Chan false hope that maybe it was him. Maybe she had been waiting for him to ask her out this whole time.

            Then he walked into his still empty apartment, a text from Y/n saying she was staying with Jungkook for the night, and his world crumbled around him. Maybe it was Jungkook she was waiting for this entire time. And how was he supposed to compete with him?

~

            “You feeling better?” Seokmin asked when she got to work the following day. She gave him a small nod, apologizing for leaving him alone the night before. “Jungkook explained everything to me when he got in earlier.”

            “Everything?”

            “Yeah. How the two of you went out to eat before work and you ate something bad.” Jungkook, forever her life saver.

            “Right. Still, I’ll make it up to you. Name your price.” Seokmin pretended to think for a minute, rubbing his chin as if he had a beard. She giggled to herself at his antics, thinking that he really was cute.

            With her hope of being with Chan completely crushed, she allowed herself to focus on Seokmin instead. How handsome he truly was. Remembering all the times he’s made her laugh over the week of getting to really know him. Maybe he really was the one she needed the entire time. The one to help her move on from Chan. “You have tomorrow off, right?” He asked after some time, and she nodded is response. “Go on a date with me.”

            “Okay.” She answered with no hesitation.

~

            Chan was the one to answer the door when Seokmin came to pick her up. Seokmin greeted him with a wide smile, holding out his hand to introduce himself, but Chan just stared at him, realizing his nightmare was coming true.

            He had convinced himself that she was dating Jungkook, but seeing Seokmin standing in his doorway, his world began to crumble all over again. The seemingly perfect new guy that everyone was fawning over stood in front of him, introducing himself as if he wasn’t the talk of the campus. As if Chan hadn’t spent hours pouring over all his social media hoping to find a flaw in him. Hoping to find a reason his best friend should never go out with him, but there wasn’t one.

            “You didn’t have to come all the way up.” Y/n giggled as she shook her head.

            “I’m a gentleman, Y/n.” She quickly slipped her shoes on, turning to Chan, and telling him she’d see him later, trying not to make it obvious that it still hurt to look at him. That it was that girl’s face she saw whenever she looked at him.

            But all that Chan saw was the smile she gave Seokmin. A smile she no longer gives Chan. The same smile he’s written far too many songs about. And in this moment, he writes another one in his mind. About the smile that gave him comfort now causing him pain.

~

            He took her on a picnic. Of all the first dates she’s been on in the passed few weeks, not a single person put in as much effort as he did. All the food was homemade, recipes he asked Jungkook for so he knew she’d like it.

            He listened to her talk, looking at her like she was the most beautiful thing he’s ever seen. Asked questions that really made her think, giving his own answers, having small debates over their differing opinions, but it was all in good fun, ending in a fit of laughter every single time.

            There was no awkward silence, no uncomfortable moments between them. Like this is how it was meant to be; the two of them being like this. It was the most fun she had had on a date in a long time.

            But Seokmin could see the distance in her eyes. He could tell that every smile wasn’t meant for him. She didn’t want to be here with him, and her reputation crossed his mind. They had her all wrong. She wasn’t stuck up, she was in love.

            She tried her best to focus on Seokmin, trying not to let her mind drift to Chan and whatever he might be doing at the moment. She made the move to hold his hand while he walked her home, lacing their fingers together, and smiling at him as if he was the one she wanted to be with this whole time. “This was a lot of fun.” She told him once they were outside of her building.

            “Would you want to go out again?” He knew the answer. He knew she was going to say no. Reject him like she rejected everyone else. Because the one she wanted to be with was waiting for her upstairs. It was easy for Seokmin to put the pieces together, recognizing Chan from the bowling alley. The night Y/n left early, after seeing him there with another girl. She wasn’t sick, she was heartbroken.

            “I’d really like that, Seokmin.” She surprised him with her answer, agreeing to a second date. “Text me the details.” He nodded, letting go of her hand, and watching her disappear into her building.

~

            A few days later, Y/n was sat on the couch, periodically looking at her phone as the minutes passed. Seokmin was supposed to pick her up ten minutes ago, but he was nowhere to be seen. She scrolled through their conversation, hoping that maybe she got the time wrong. Maybe she was actually supposed to meet him at the restaurant and she was the one that was late.

            But there, clear as day, he told her he would pick her up at 6. And she finally came to terms with the fact that she was being stood up. She finally agreed to a second date, finally found someone that could take her mind off her feelings for Chan, and he stood her up, leaving her heart in the hands of her best friend once again.

            “Aren’t you supposed to be on a date?” She turned around, seeing Chan at the door with a bag from the convenience store in his hand. He slipped his shoes off and walked to where she was. She was sat on the couch, clearly dressed up for a fancy dinner, waiting for someone that wasn’t him.

            “He stood me up.” She whispered. Chan couldn’t believe the words he was hearing, anger flowing through his veins. How could anyone do this to her? Seokmin had the girl Chan was in love with in his hands, and he let her go.

            “Give me a minute.” Chan said, disappearing into his room before emerging minutes later dressed in a suit. She looked up at him confused as he stood in front of her, holding out his hand for her to take. “No point letting that dress go to waste.” He explained with a smile, and she slid her hand into his, allowing him to pull her off the couch. “Been a while since we went out to dinner together.”

            “Yeah.” She agreed almost breathlessly. Chan hadn’t let go of her hand, lacing their fingers together instead as they walked to his car. He opened her door for her, placing his hand above her head to make sure she wouldn’t hurt herself. And she allowed herself to imagine this is what a date with Chan would be like. Allowed herself to pretend that this was a date, that Chan wanted to go out with her.

~

            The air surrounding them felt different. They had gone out to dinner together many times during their years as friends, but none were as fancy as this. A candle was lit in the middle of the table, soft, romantic music was playing, and everyone around them were clearly couples. She felt like they stood out, like everyone could tell they were nothing more than just friends.

            But when she excused herself to the bathroom after ordering, an older lady stood at the sink beside the one she was using, and she smiled at her. “You and your boyfriend remind me of when my husband and I were young and newly in love.” She said.

            “Pardon?”

            “He looks at you like you’re the only thing he wants to see for the rest of his life. It’s the same look my husband gave me on our wedding day. Hold on tightly to him. You’ll never find a love like that anywhere else.” She patted the back of her hand before exiting the bathroom, returning to her husband. Did Chan really look at her like that? Was she just blind this entire time? Were all these first dates just holding her back from being with the one she loved?

            “You feeling okay? You were gone for a while.” And then she saw it. Behind the concern, she saw it. He looked at her with love. The same way she’s always looked at him. Love. Longing. Forever. She saw it all in his eyes.

            “Yeah. I’m good.” She smiled, placing her hand on top of his. He turned his hand so he could hold hers, returning the smile she gave him. And it was like no words needed to be said. Everything was in their eyes. All the feelings they hid, the confessions left unspoken, were in their eyes.

~

            After dinner, they decided to take a walk, enjoying the nice night. Chan placed his jacket on her shoulders before grabbing her hand, slowly swinging their arms back and forth as they walked. The silence was comfortable as everything seemingly fell into place.

            “So, do I get a second date?”

back to masterlist

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[crazyk-imagine]

Backup and Retired Agents

Pairing: Kai Holman x Female!reader

Characters: Female!reader, Jane Tenant, Kai Holman, Lucy Tara, Jesse Boone, Ernie Malik

Warnings: Fluff, classic ncis hawaii things, mentions of murders, weapons use, reader making stupid decisions, Kai being a simp, angst, fluff, reader running into danger, Jane shipping reader and Kai, Jesse and Lucy being siblings, Ernie being an icon

Word Count: 2,453

A/N: I tried finding ncis: hawaii fics and uh- nothing came up so, here we are

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

You lean against the wall, pulling out your phone to call the one person you know can help.

"This is Tenant," she says, walking past her teams desks.

"Hey, girly."

She tilts her head, taking in your hushed tone. "You don't sound fine, everything okay?"

"Oh, yeah. I get into town for a brief meeting and then I'm being held down because some assholes want to-" You duck further into your hiding spot at the sound of footsteps. "Kill me."

Her shoulders tense up as she heads straight for the teams meeting room, already spotting them. "Where are you?" She places her phone on the table with everyone listening in, confused about their boss’s attitude. She gestures to Ernie to track the call.

"Abandoned mansion, I think?" You groan and grab your gun. "Jay, if anything happens-"

"Nothing's going to happen. We're going to find you."

"Not before they find me. I'm gonna have to split." You hang up and slowly step down the stairs. "Ernie?"

"I got her location but you're not going to like it."

"Why?"

"Isn't that where the drug dealers were?" Lucy chimes in.

"What is she doing there?"

"Based on the timeline of where the phone has been within the last two days, I'd say this is a kidnapping."

She sighs, knowing as soon as she saw that last name, she should have called you.

-

"Jesse, Lucy, you two take the front. Kai with me." Jane carefully steps ahead, searching all blind spots.

Kai grunts as his back hits the wall, bringing his arm up to elbow the guy punching his stomach.

Jane pulls the attacker off him and takes him down, giving Kai a few seconds to catch his breath.

In a team effort, they’re able to knock the man unconscious.

"We need to keep moving, we've checked every other room except the-"

The grunting and groaning of fighting drew the two into the kitchen.

You slide into the hallway, landing at her feet. You pull the emergency knife out of your boot and chuck it in the attacker's direction. "Tenant, get down."

She ducks as she and Kai pull you out of the doorway.

"Someone needs to go around back so we can catch this son of a bitch," you order the two.

"I'll go around back, you two stay here," Jane speaks to the two of you.

"I got nowhere else to go!" As soon as she rounds the corner, you look over your shoulder. "You cover me," you tell him.

He shakes his head. "I'm not letting you out of my sight."

"Keep sight on my back then." You charge into the kitchen and tackle down to the main guy who grabbed you from the airport.

Kai pushes himself off the ground, following you. He wonders how someone as risky as you could know someone as collected as his boss.

As soon as you're pushed out of the way, he grabs the guy and brings his elbow up before digging it into his back and then raising his knee to aim for his ribs.

Kai is kicked away, landing on his back, staring up at the ceiling while trying to catch his breath before he can help you.

You jump onto the guy’s back, wrapping your elbow around his neck.

You’re thrown over his shoulder and he set his boot on your neck. You struggle to keep the weight off you, kicking your feet the more you lose air.

"Freeze NCIS."

You don’t think you’ve ever been as excited to hear someone being arrested more than in this moment.

He removes his foot and places his hands on the back of your head.

"You plan on getting up any time soon?"

You shrug, "nah. I like the ground, it's my friend."

Lucy and Jesse glance at one another.

Kai holds his hand out for you to take.

"If I must." You grab his hand and misstep, gripping his hand tighter as his other arm wraps around your waist. "Woah, little lightheaded, thanks, cutie." You turn to your longest friend and ex-coworker. "Jay, we have a lot to talk about."

"Damn, right we do."

-

You two walk down the hallway, to the front door. "If it makes you feel better, I'm only here to see you and save my family. "

"What do you mean?" She wonders if you know what happened to him.

"He got involved in drug running, wanted out once he met his girl. They didn't like that, especially when they knew his sister was in the navy and had connections to take them down. I came down when they called, and said they needed my help. What's a sister to do other than come back from an early vacation to save them."

"Then you got grabbed and called me."

"Yeah."

"What else can you tell us about the people who grabbed you?"

You glance around the room, checking over each of her teammates. "They were assholes, " You blurt out.

Everyone but Jane tried to cover up their humor.

"Anything that can help us find the rest of the crew."

" Yeah, actually." You reach into your pocket. "This was in the trunk where they kindly shoved me."

"This matches the stuff we found a few days ago," Jesse adds. "Why was your brother involved in this?"

"He's an idiot and needed the money. Everybody knew he couldn't hold a job. Mom was hard on him once dad left and it was just her. He got into trouble, I was the one who saved him and was someone he looked up to."

"He wanted out and the boss wasn't happy. So, someone knew he called you and what happened then?" Jane asks.

"He disappeared," you tell them, not divulging into any more detail than that.

"You find him?"

"No." You run your hand over your face. "That's why I came here in person."

"We can help you."

"I don't want you or your team to get in trouble."

"You called to help and that's what you're getting."

You purse your lips. "And you all agree to this?"

"Anywhere Tenant goes, we go," Jesse tells you.

You let out a nervous breath. "Okay."

-

You should have listened; you should've stayed put when Jane told you to.

But you don't regret your decision though because going in and getting your brother's daughter is worth getting a fist in the gut, maybe you'll say this after (if you make it out).

-

Jane calls for you in the ear comm, "Pinstripe, what's your position? Hey, pinstripe. What's your position?" She sighs, "does anyone have eyes on her?"

Ernie calls Jesse, "uh- guys."

"What's going on Ernie? We're a little busy right now, we lost her."

"Yeah, thing is, her brother isn't there."

"What do you mean?"

"He's been dead since he tried getting out of, well, this."

"Then why is she here? Why drag us into it?"

"They killed his girlfriend when she got to the island and have been blackmailing her because they have his daughter."

"She never told us he had a kid."

"That's because he didn't want anyone to know in case this would happen. They were both trying to prevent the girl from getting involved. She thought she could save them both but when they killed his girlfriend, she knew it was only a matter of time before they came for her."

"Why not go for his sister?"

"At the time she was deployed but since then, she’s put in a notice for an early retirement and cleaned out her savings so-"

"They could run."

"Or put her up for adoption while she sacrifices her life for the family."

"Does Tenant know?"

"You were the first person I called because everyone else's phone is off... and I was hoping you would answer."

"Okay, anything else before we go in?"

"Nope, go save the day."

"Tenant?" He calls for her through the comm.

"What is it?"

"She's in there for her niece, her brother's been dead for the last four months. They killed his girlfriend two days ago."

"She's-" she sighs, "how many in there?"

"Four total, two hostages."

"On my count. Jesse, you go through the front. Lucy, side way. Kai, you're with me."

The two make their way round the back and slowly step towards the open back door and enter the room.

Jesse and Lucy have the two in cuffs by the time you noticed back up arrived.

You groan as another punch lands on your stomach.

Kai and Jane step behind him. "Hands up, NCIS.”

The guy doesn’t move.

“Drop your weapon and put your hands behind your head."

You're grabbed and held close to him, the cold metal pressed against your head. "Drop it or she dies, like her brother."

You clench your jaw at the words.

"You've already taken the family, isn't this enough?" Kai asks, taking a small step forward.

The guy hold you stretches his arm out, giving the two the opportunity to shoot him.

Jane steps towards the man and kicks his gun away before checking his pulse.

You stare up at the ceiling.

Jane gestures for Kai to stay with you while she checks on the others.

"You okay?"

"Just peachy, almost died twice but peachy keen."

"Yeah, but just think you're still here to see your niece grow up."

"I mean, yeah."

"That's something to look forward to."

The corners of your lips twitch, "you're right."

-

"You should have been honest."

"I could handle it."

"You almost died, twice."

"Maybe that was a distraction."

"I know how you work."

"You would have gotten my letter about my death plan."

"That's not funny."

"It's not meant to be but it does mean, I only trust you."

"And I appreciate the sentiment behind that, but this is about your life. You almost died today and lied to me."

"I did, I'm sorry about that but you understand why I did it."

"I do but that doesn't make it right. I want you to talk to me and trust that I can help you."

"I do, believe me, I do." You rub your hands over your face, "I just- I didn't want your family to lose you because you're there for them. I didn't- I didn't want to be the reason you died if you helped me."

She reaches across the table, holding your hand. "It would have been my choice and not your fault. You know we work together because we have each other's backs."

"I," you sniff. "I don't know what to say."

"We can start off with thank you and then... I can ask what's going on with you and Kai?"

You wipe the corner of your eyes before furrowing your brows. "What?"

"Kind of tall, perfect for you. You called him cutie, I think?"

"The one that pulled me up. He's adorable but not ready for a girl."

Jane purses her lips, tilting her head. "He is and I think he likes you."

"What makes you say that?"

She smirks, raining a brow. "He's staring at you from his desk."

You glance over your shoulder and watch as he quickly busies himself with fake paperwork before turning back towards you, catching your gaze, and turning away again. You sigh and move in the chair, turning back towards Jane. "He's not going to want to get with a single aunt."

"Never judge a book by its cover."

You roll your eyes, "I'm pretty sure I was the one who said that to you."

"And how does it feel to have your words thrown back in your face?"

"Not nice at all." You leave her to finish her paperwork and whatnot, deciding it's time to get your new life started. You grab the car seat and start walking down the walkway, stopping when your name is called. "Yes?"

"Wh- are you heading home now?"

"Actually, to a hotel, at least, until I find a home for us," you gesture to the sleeping girl.

"Right, right. Uh- well, did- did you have any plans for dinner?"

"Not particularly. Why? You offering?" You ask jokingly.

"I mean, if you really want to."

"Okay, before I say yes or no. I have one thing to say, and you need to listen."

"Okay."

"Do you really want to go out with me? Even if it's just for dinner because my life has changed, and I don't want to drag you into this."

"Hey, hey. I know things have changed for you but just because you're going to be taking on the role of a guardian, for a little girl who is lucky by the way, doesn't scare me."

The corner of your lips twitch, "good answer. I'm afraid we're going to need to do an at home dinner."

"That's fine by me."

"Hey," Jane sticks her head out of the door. "Alex and Julie are home right now, I told them I'm sending you over just for the night until you figure something out."

You narrow your eyes to her. "Convenient."

"Very, see you later. Kai?"

"Yes, ma'am?"

"Keep them safe."

He glances at you and gives his attention back to her. "Of course."

"That's what I like to hear."

-

You two share a nice meal together while figuring out how to take care of a growing baby. "I can see why my mom sent you two over."

You turn to Alex, "what makes you say that?"

"For one, the house has a happy vibe to it and what better place to have a first date than with her homemade spies."

"You tell her everything?"

He shrugs, "maybe, maybe not."

"You can't bargain with me, kid. I worked with your mother."

"Fine but don't expect me to keep quiet about this."

"I know we're going to have a long chat in the morning."

-

You gently close the door behind you, not wanting to wake up your niece. "Tonight was fun," you put your hands in your back pockets.

"It was."

"This suddenly feels awkward," you chuckle.

"A little but I think this was- today was crazy but I'm happy to have met you."

"Thanks for lifting me up when you did."

"It was no big deal."

You take a deep breath, "I guess I'll see you at some point tomorrow?"

He nods, "definitely."

The longer you stare, the bigger the smile stretches across both your lips.

You lean in, giving him a hug. "Take care and get home safe, okay?"

"Always."

You pull back and peck him on the lips before making your way back into the house.

You lean against the door, tracing your lips. "Oh god. Oh god. Oh god!"

"Well, that was adorable."

"Shut up, Jay." 

[prettyboybuckley]

20 Questions for Fic Writers

tagged by @saybiwithme @bi-buckrights @zainclaw

How many works do you have on ao3?

160

What's your total ao3 word count?

1,070,239

What fandoms do you write for?

I've mostly written for 9-1-1, though I started off with Shameless (6 fics) and I have written some for Teen Wolf (5 fics). There's one 9-1-1 crossover with Schitt's Creek.

Top five fics by kudos:

parents always yelling (telling us to get our acts together)

i just want something to hold on to (and a little of that human touch)

I will come to you (even in my sleep)

open up again (i believe in second chances)

exes and the oh's

Do you respond to comments?

Always, even if it takes me months. I actually just caught up again (there's still a bunch to go, but right now the oldest is 17 days ago instead of 250 days...). It's just a rule I have for myself, and even with the backlog I've kept it up so far, so I'm not going to stop doing it now.

What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

I'm not a big fan of angsty endings, I generally try to at least make it a hopeful ending or, in the case of the college au, use an epilogue to fix things.

But I guess sunny skies & summer highs qualifies as an angsty ending simply because of the cliffhanger (and yes, there is still going to be a continuation, I'm working on it 🙈).

What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

Choosing one out of 160 is really hard, but I think tell me, will you stay or will you run away is definitely one that deserves a mention here, because it already has a happy ending and then the epilogue just makes it even better 🥰

Do you get hate on fics?

Not commented on the fic itself, no. I've had some people talk shit about my fics on twitter, though, and not even vaguely but calling me by (user)name.

Do you write smut?

Is grass green? Yeah, I write smut 🤭 Thanks to two times kinktober, I have 95 explicit fics, by far the most used rating for my fics.

Craziest crossover:

let's have some fun tonight is my 9-1-1/Schitt's Creek crossover fic for 9-1-1 Rarepair Week, and my only crossover fic

Have you ever had a fic stolen?

My head over feet Buddie valentine's two-parter got posted as one chapter in Wattpad work with over 30 fics once. Filed a DMCA and Wattpad took it down within two hours.

Have you ever had a fic translated?

Two of my fics have been translated into Russian afaik, one on ao3 and one on Ficbook

Have you ever cowritten a fic before?

Nope. It may be a nice challenge for the future? Not sure who I'd do it with.

All time favourite ship?

Gotta go for Buddie on that one, lol. Especially if you look at my writing history. But I often tend to hyperfixate on one ship at a time (current reading obsession is McDanno)

What's a wip you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

Buck's POV of if love is art then you might be my masterpiece. I really want to, but at this point it's been two years since the original so I don't know if it'd be worth it either. (I know not everyone was happy about how I ended it, but I doubt any of them are still waiting for more). Writing a different POV of the same fic takes an amount of planning that my brain just really struggles with. And I could pick up where the last chapter (before the epilogue) picks up, but I think that way there would be some crucial information about Buck missing.

What are your writing strengths?

I've been told quite a lot of times that I am good at keeping characters, well, in character, even when putting them in partial or complete AU's. Of course, what is in character or not is subjective, but I do always challenge myself to work as much of the canon backstory and personality into who they are in the AU as possible.

And I like to think I'm pretty good at writing smut.

What are your writing weaknesses?

I'm terrible at pacing, which multiple of my long fics prove. It'll be drawn out first and then suddenly rushing. And being ESL I do struggle with things like sentence structure and grammar pretty regularly still.

Thoughts on dialogue in another language?

As long as there is some kind of translation provided somewhere I like it, but I'm not so quick to use it myself. Not beyond a few Spanish words here and there (generally pet names between Eddie and his family we've seen on the show or the occasional curse word when I feel it fits better than an English one, but I usually need to employ help from Spanish-speaking friends for those).

First fandom you wrote in?

Shameless! I binged that right before I started 9-1-1 and combined with the creative writing minor I was doing, it was actually what got me back into writing in general and what made me write my first ever fic.

Favorite fic you've written?

My in your arms i feel safe-series (which I always lovingly refer to as the ace kink fic) is definitely one of my favorites simply because of how personal it is to me and for the reason behind me writing it in the first place.

Other strong contenders are i would've loved you forever (it's never enough but i wanted it to be) and i'm begging you, come home to me (Teen Wolf, Thiam)

tagging @monsterrae1 @rogerzsteven @loserdiaz @watchyourbuck

[chaotic--nat]

Can I have Ian Malcolm x reader where they both stay awake with each other after nightmares and fluff smut ensues,?

Ian Malcolm x Reader !

content: smut, fem!reader, fuck idk Ian body worship era, og jurassic park Ian, scientist reader, implied relationship

small summary: you and Ian had an eventful night after he gave you an on-hands demonstration of chaos theory

word count: 504

You and Ian were both respected scientists and as you worked together on numerous experiments, an all nighter in either one’s lab was destined to happen; luckily you were prepared with blankets, coffee, and various snacks! You enjoyed working with Ian because he always managed to keep you on your feet, his charming ways always had you surprised..especially this evening! Although you were an experimental psychologist and Ian was a chaos theorist, your work with him always made sense, which is why you're currently struggling to find the words to explain what predicament you're in, maybe he just left you speechless..

It all started with you sitting beside Ian as he showed you how chaos theory worked with water, his coarse hands delicately held yours as he poured the water in your hand. You did your best to pay attention as his hands played with yours, his hands were so gentle as he guided yours to make the water move around. As he moved your hand around, you couldn’t help but giggle at the thought of his fingers just making you a mess.. just the thought of Ian pleasing you and fucking you just with his fingers made you needy.. you weren’t sure if your fantasies were obvious but you were sure snapped back into reality from your dirty thoughts when Ian dried your hand up! 

As he did, he couldn’t help but ask “Did I lose you there? You started turnin’ all glass eyed.” He let out a small chuckle and you quickly nodded and laughed “yes I'm okay! I just had a few thoughts..for our next..experiment-! Though it’s a rather embarrassing idea” Ian couldn’t help but look at you with such an intrigued facial expression,, his face, his lovely, handsome face. His eyes were beautiful, you could stare and melt into them almost instantly! He leaned forward with a small chuckle to give you a quick peck on the lips “please, enlighten me dear. I'm sure it’s not embarrassing.” You couldn’t find a way to bring yourself to tell him that such a small thing gave you such a horny idea! 

He could tell by the way your cheeks flushed that there was no way in hell you were going to say anything.. Within an instant, Ian leaned forward and gently kissed your cheek, as he pulled away with a smirk he stated “if you’re so interested in something being studied, then my god, give me the opportunity..to study every inch of your body..” before you could process his question,, well statement, he had already pulled you into a sloppy kiss. You couldn’t help but whine as his movements, only encouraging him more to fuck you right this moment. Ian grabs you by your waist and sets you down on a nearby table and he instantly wipes the table clean, your brain was getting fuzzy already so all you could do was giggle..I think Ian enjoyed that too much, making your pretty little head go all fuzzy…!

author’s note: lmfao this took me too long to post, my wife helped me write this, I'll probably continue it later 💃🏻

[marvel-ous-m]

20 Questions for Writers!

I was tagged by @devondespresso @pearynice and @spicysix!

1. How many works do you have on AO3?

I have 15! 14 in Stranger Things, and one abandoned Marvel fic that I don’t have the strength to admit is really abandoned. 

2. What's your total AO3 word count?

158,993! Over 100,000 of that was in the last 6 months, which is absolutely wild for my lizard brain to comprehend. (Writing, it's free therapy).

3. What fandoms do you write for?

Stranger Things! Like I said above, I used to write for Marvel, but most of my interest in the MCU went out the window after Multiverse of Madness. (Don’t worry, I still love you Spiderman <3) 

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

Eddie Munson’s Guide for How to Adopt a Jock in Four Easy Steps

Closer to Fine

Something’s In My Mine (and I’m Focused On You) 

Summer Child

Don’t Cry Over Spilled Tang (Steve Learns to Cry)

5. Do you respond to comments?

Yes! As much as I can! I’ve been taking a little impromptu break from comment responses but I loveee getting to interact with comments, it brings so much joy to my life!

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

I tend to stay pretty firmly in the happy ending cap, but I think that Tonight, Tonight is my saddest/angstiest ending. 

7. What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

Oh man, I’m gonna give this to Summer Child (linked above). It was a birthday gift to myself, and even if it’s kinda unrealistic to suddenly have all of Steve’s problems fixed within 2,500 words, I needed some tooth-rotting fluff. 

8. Do you get hate on fics?

I have in the past, but I really don’t in the Stranger Things fandom! 

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

Not reallllly. I have quite a few fade to black moments in fics though. I might have some smut in an upcoming fic, but I personally don’t love adding smut to a story focused on plot unless it advances the plot. Just a personal preference thing!! 

10. Do you write crossovers?

No (?)- I’m not opposed, and I seriously LOVE reading Spiderman-Stranger Things crossovers, but I haven’t written anything yet. If inspiration strikes though, I’d be down. 

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Not that I know of. 

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

Not that I’m aware of, but I’d totally love this!

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

My friend and I had a notebook in middle school that we would pass back and forth and write Supernatural reader insert in-

Uhhhh I mean no. 

14. What's your all-time favourite ship?

Steddie <3 

15. What's a WIP you want to finish but doubt you will?

This award goes to Why Can’t This Be Love (my Marvel fic). Everything else I’ve written that has been posted will be or has been completed!

16. What are your writing strengths?

I think characterization and dialogue are my strengths, with the obvious caveat that my fics tend to be AU or canon divergence, so my characterization is certainly not spot-on to what you see in the show, but I think that I’m good at it for the story that I’m writing. 

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

Pacing and descriptors. I definitely have some moments where I’m like “I need to get this over with, this does not need to be so descriptive” but I get attached to the little world I’ve written and struggle to delete whatever is getting in the way. 

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic?

Oooo. Personally I think it depends, but I tend to lean towards no unless you have someone who can speak that language consulting with you. 

19. First fandom you wrote for?

Doctor Who (and I am embarrassed to admit that I wrote it on a typewriter and gave it to my 6th grade teacher to show her I was good at writing). 

20. Favorite fic you've written?

Something’s In My Mind is my favorite child and probably will be for always. I love those funky little guys <3 <3 

Some people I'm challenging! No stress tags, apologies if you've already been tagged and/or have already completed this 20 questions game. (Also if you haven't been tagged but would like to partake, this is your informal invitation to do so!!) @hairstevington @klausinamarink @hellfireloserclub

[dracwife]

reverence.

ship: a taste of the divine -> dracula/ambroży

word count: 735

summary: the count shows his guest to the library for the first time.

"Have you read them all?"

He looks down at Ambroży who looks on in childlike wonder, and the other almost smiles as he continues his lead, engulfed in the mass of his cape which sways slightly as they stop walking before settling against his form. 

"But of course," he goads, lips curling into a smirk, "Many times."

Ambroży's expression glows in admiration -- he peers around the rest of the library in awe; There must be thousands of books here, more than he, no, more than any human could read in a lifetime.

Ah, Ambroży chides himself, but therein lies the difference.

He is reminded as the man next to him extends a deathly pale hand from deep within his bundled cloak, and gestures welcomingly towards the sprawling walls of texts that surely he must do something with his time alone in that castle.

"Consider it yours as much as it is mine," the words roll off of the Count's tongue with a reverent hospitality. Ever cordial, he motions Ambroży forward in front of himself and the scholar wastes no time in scouring the shelves, eye-level first, then above, soaking in every volume's title, the scent of ancient parchment and fading ink, with leather bindings and he takes particular care with every book he pulls from its place, frightened perhaps for the first time since stepping foot here in this castle not of any creature or consequence but that maybe, if he is not so gentle he may shatter the illusion and awake from a dream, a dream he is so sure he must be in, lest he truly find himself in an unending sea of tales and poetry, of science and astronomy and every other possible thing he could ever wish to learn of, and beyond that too. 

The other figure, the taller of the two reaches just above where Ambroży struggles to pull a tome from its place and easily slips it down, blowing gently the dust off opposite of where they face and gladly then into the hands of the eagerly awaiting poet, who thanks him with a rosy-cheeked sheepish grin.

The Count breathes an airy chuckle, nearly silent and gone unnoticed at all by his guest. He cannot remember the last time any person has been so truly and genuinely joyous to be in his presence, and with this one in particular there seemed to be not even the slightest sign of fear nor contempt in the way the hunters and naïve villagers held such deeply hateful emotions close to their hearts, the fear of the children dared by their friends to visit that darkly looming castle upon the horizon -- just pure curiosity. It nearly enthralls him. It has been so long since he has kept such good company, he forgets how charming humans can be in their own right if given the chance. Many other thoughts snake their way into his mind, and as it fills with contemplations, he bows his head just slightly, "I shall leave you to it, then."

Ambroży is snapped from his awe at the silvery smoothness of his host's voice. 

"I shall be just down the hall, if you need anything. I will return to escort you to your room, when you are ready."

He turns and begins his trek, but stops short at Ambroży's voice one last time, who has finally allowed his body to catch up to his mind as he quickly questions the Count.

"How will you know when I'm ready?"

"Just call for me. I assure you I will hear it."

Ambroży nods, already losing himself to thought again, but snaps back one last time:

"Count Dracula?"

"If you will be staying here, I must insist you call me by my given name: Just Vlad will do."

"Thank you, again, Vlad."

He hums; Never has his name sounded so sweet. Grins with a gentle admiring, much in the same way his guest had looked nearly minutes before.

"I don't understand why they say the things they do about you."

The vampire's brows furrow, but not in misunderstanding. He knows all too well what the villagers say about him. Rather, he is left feeling…strange by the remark. A feeling he knows, but seems so distant. Melancholic, perhaps.

Centuries in isolation will do that, he supposes.

"I will be in my study," he rushes towards the door, cloak once again flowing freely behind him in an almost hypnotic wave. Ambroży watches as he leaves, and wonders if the fabric is as soft as it looks. If perhaps it is warm, too. Then he smiles.

He could very much get used to being here.

[analogwriting]

Not the American Average

Sabo x gn!reader

word count: 4k

a/n: disclaimer; i tried my hardest to keep it vague enough to keep it gender neutral. lemme know if i fucked up lmao.

also i was listening to an old middle school playlist when ntaa by asking alexandria played (an old fave of mine, still goes hard btw). and i instantly thought of sabo mostly bc he's british n so is danny (lead singer) and the whole song is just about him fuckin' an american girl (for the first time, i'm pretty sure). ANYWAY i could go on about the lore but this is my first time posting my smut so don't judge me too hard. i also wrote this, in, like, two hours n im v sleep deprived. okie imma stop ramblin' now (idk if you can see it but the bolded is the lyrics of the song)

On a night after heavy drinking, Sabo finds himself stumbling to a hotel with someone he’d been eyeing at the bar all week. He was currently in this town on a mission. With how much he’d had to drink, he couldn’t even recall the mission right now - not that it mattered, it was over with anyway. He was just enjoying the last few nights he had here before he had to move on to the next one.

“One, two, three…four! Here we are,” he said, fumbling with his keys. A giggle escapes from your lips as you hang on his arm. You watched him struggle for a moment before taking them from him and successfully opening the door. He stared at you for a moment, once again, your words ringing in his head. When he had finally built up the courage to seek you out, you had surprised him with all the obscenities you had whispered in his ear. Even church grandmothers’ would’ve fainted at your words - however it had only made his own heart race.

In your drunken conversation, you had told him he could do whatever he wanted. That you could see the feral side of him that he kept deep down within him. That you wanted him to bring it out and use it against you. And he had taken you up on it. It all seemed too good to be true. 

Sure, he’s had people say things like that before, but none of them ever stuck through with their words and there was always a hint of hesitation. However, the way you said it? There was a certain tone of your voice that he couldn’t say no to.

He felt like it was a dream. “All the things that you said, was it all in my head?” he mumbled to himself. “Huh?” You turned to look at him and he just smiled, sliding his arms around your waist as he kissed you hard.

He could hear a gasp fall from your lips accompanied by a loud moan. You were just as excited as he was.“Come on, baby…” He kissed at your neck, causing you to moan a little louder. He felt as your hands gripped his sleeves. “Keep it down.” He brought a gloved hand up and traced your jawline before going over your bottom lip.. “Honey, hush your lips.” You pushed forward, kissing him hard and pushing him into the threshold of the dingy hotel room he had been staying in these last few days.

A low chuckle escaped from him as you immediately began to tear off his clothing. He closed the door behind him, doing the same to you. Clothes training from the backdoor, to the bedroom. You two were on a mission and nothing was stopping you, not even undressing. Your lips barely left one another, constant contact was established. An addiction already seemed to be starting to form - which could be dangerous.

Sabo realizes something, chuckling softly. “I’ve been watching you the last few nights and I don’t even know your name,” he purred against your neck as he started to attack it once more. He kissed and bit at your flesh, feeling himself growing harder every time you let out a whine.

Oh, how he loved the way you reacted to his touches. You seemed to melt against him, your body molding perfectly with his. The only regret he had now was not doing this with you sooner.

He watched you as a coy look spread across your face. “Mm, we can do introductions later. Easier for you to degrade me if you don’t know.” You winked at him, and he felt his heart racing. How the hell were you so fucking perfect? You were like an answer to his dreams. Excitement filled his chest and he kissed you hard, gripping your hips roughly. When you gasped, he used this opportunity to let his tongue explore the insides of your mouth.

After a moment, he pulled away, leaving both of you panting. “Give me all you got - make this night worth my time.” 

You laugh, and by golly, it’s the most beautiful sound he’s ever heard. It’s what drew his attention to you in the first place. He had been in mid conversation with someone when he heard it the first time. His head snapped over so quickly that his colleague was concerned he’d break it. “How about you make this worth my time,” you teased, tugging on his hair to kiss him once more and he groaned against you. Fuck, you and that tongue of yours.

You drove him wild, making him all kinds of excited. He’s never felt so alive. Never had a hookup who met his own energy. He might just have to take you with him if everything went well enough. His cause always needed more people and you seemed competent enough. Or maybe he’d just keep you around as his little whore.

He already knew that he was going to love every moment of this. “What I would give to live this night again,” he mumbled against you once more, his hands trailing down your arms before grabbing your wrists and pinning them above your head as he pushed you against the wall. You gasped, looking at him with a mix of surprise and excitement. “We haven’t even gotten to the good parts yet,” you purred, licking your lips as you took him in. The hungry look in your eyes was going to drive him over the edge.

“I knew when I first saw you…” He trailed off, kissing at your jaw and nearing your ear, nipping it lightly. “You’d fuck like a whore.” He felt you shiver against him. You were loving this just as much as he was. “Mmm, only for those who I think have promise.” Oh, such sharp wit.

He watched you for a moment, grinning. Fuck, you were breathtaking. He didn’t know if he just wanted to sit and look at you or absolutely devour you. There was just something about you that made it hard for him to think straight. He dove back in, releasing your hands. They immediately found their way around his neck. He felt you tug his hair and he let out a growl.

He buried his face in your neck, covering you with hickies. Your little mewls and moans made him so painfully hard. His teeth grazed your skin before he bit down, rather hard, on your shoulder. You cried out, not from pain, but from absolute pleasure. He felt you move your hand, getting ready to cover your mouth when he stopped you. He pinned your wrist above your head, clicking his tongue.

“Oh, absolutely not. I hope they hear you scream for more.” 

He watched in amusement as you squirmed beneath him, your face turning red. But he could also see the excitement in your eyes and, for a moment, he could’ve swore he could hear your heart racing. He kissed you again, moving to your jaw, your neck, your chest. He trailed his kisses down, down.

As he moved lower, he was eventually on his own knees, looking up at you. The lust filled look in your eyes easily kept him going. He was going to make sure you screamed with pleasure. He loved hearing the sounds you made. In one quick movement, he had one of your legs over his shoulder, kissing your inner thigh. He felt you shiver underneath his touch.

He grinned, feeling his own excitement growing. As much as he wanted to pin you to the bed and absolutely ravage you, he was having fun toying with you like this. “Your thighs were made for cheeks to graze.” He bit your inner thigh, causing you to squeak out another moan in surprise. He trailed his lips along your inner thigh, moving closer and closer to your own arousal. The smell was intoxicating. You were like a beast in heat.

So was he.

The featherlight touches were making you squirm and mewl, something he was quite enjoying. You were riled up. “Please,” you begged. He felt his own heart race and he grinned. “We can’t rush these things.” He was honestly just enjoying the show. He stopped short of finally giving you what you wanted, causing you to whine.

He licked his lips, looking at you. He studied your face, admiring your lust blown pupils. “My lips will be your poison.”

He pulled away, removing your leg off of his shoulder which earned a confused look from you. He stood back up, kissing you again before he flipped you around. He pressed into your body, feeling you up and down. You gasped as the cool wall touched your bare skin. He felt as you shivered against him. “Oh, my apologies, didn’t mean to make you so cold.” 

Suddenly, he bent you over, admiring your ass. He licked his lips, groping at you roughly, causing you to moan loudly and press into his touches. Your desperation was evident and he wanted to drive you absolutely insane. He was going to fine dine on this bodacious ass of yours.

He didn’t give you time to process exactly what was happening before he spread your cheeks and dove right in.

It wasn’t long before he felt you shaking, using all your strength and concentration to keep standing but you were sinking lower and lower. He watched as your nails dug into the wall and you threw your head back as you cried out with your climax. At least your first one - he planned on pulling out as many as he could tonight. He pulled away, watching in pride as you slowly slumped to your knees. “They bring you to your knees, huh?” You looked at him over your shoulder, panting heavily. The look in your eye made him grin. You were far from done and that’s exactly what he was going to hope for.

He stands up, looking down at you. You moved to stand and he held out a hand to stop you. His own throbbing cock was in your face now. “Get down. It’s almost over. The first act, at least.” He was so painfully hard and in desperate need of release. “Ah, come on now…” 

You looked up at him through your lashes and he let out a small growl, taking a fistful of your hair and tugging it roughly. Your eyes rolled back and you moaned loudly, gripping onto his thigh to steady yourself. “Take it all the way,” he crooned.

You didn’t need to be told twice. You took him into your hand, pressing a kiss to the head of his cock before pressing a few down his shaft. Watching you practically worship his cock…it almost sent him over the edge and you hadn’t even done anything yet. 

A smile spreads across your face and you look at him with a lust fueled gaze. He felt his own body heat up and his brain short circuits for a moment. He didn’t have time to recover as you gobbled down his cock with ease. His eyes widened and his head fell back as he moaned loudly. Fuck, you felt so perfect. Your mouth was warm - throat tight. He might get addicted to you, honestly.

Then you started to absolutely go to town on his cock like some professional. As if your only job in life was to suck his cock. His head was spinning and he could already feel himself ready to finish. Were you trying to embarrass him by finishing him off quickly?

Before he could stop you to try and regain his composure, he came hard down your throat. His own voice filled the small room as he moaned along with his release. He looked down, watching you down every drop like it was the first meal you’d had in days. He was panting, his head falling back as he closed his eyes - just enjoying the feel of post climax. His whole entire body was buzzing, but he wasn’t done yet either.

Oh no. He was far from it.

Yanking you by your hair, he pulls you off of him with an audible ‘pop’. The noise resonated with his ears. He liked that noise. You hummed, looking up at him with a half lidded look that only furthered his hunger for you. He pulls you up on your feet, crashing his lips with yours. The both of you making animalistic groans against each other. He could feel your heart racing right along with his. His arms moved around your waist and he squeezed, causing you to squirm against him. “Sir,” you whined and he felt something within him snap.

“You stupid fucking whore, don’t you know how crazy you drive me?” he purred against your lips and you only answered with a breathless giggle. Even with his obscene words, you seemed to relish in them. Fuck, you were perfect.

He sat on the bed, looking up at you as you still stood. You leaned down to kiss him again, softer this time. In a way that caused his heart to race in a different kind of way. Butterflies gathering in his stomach. Oh, this was dangerous.

“And after all of all my dreaming being only you…” He leaned back as a lazy smile spread across his face, admiring your body. His eyes scanned every inch of you, burning you into his mind - you gave him a couple of poses. “You’re standing there…”

He licked his teeth, looking up at you. The gaze you were giving him caused his heart to jump into his throat. It was full of excitement and lust. He could tell you were barely holding back. He could only imagine what you were thinking right now. Oh, what he would give to be able to peek into that slutty mind of yours.

“Baby, oh the things that I could do.”

“Then do them.” His eyes widened as you moved to crawl into his lap and straddle him. Your arms found their way around his neck and you kissed him again, hungrier than the last. His hands rested on your hips, growling as you grinded into his lap. You were just trying to drive him mad, weren’t you?

“You seem to be trapped in your own head. Just act. Don’t think about it. I said anything, remember?” 

He stared at you in disbelief. How were you already able to call him out so easily? It's like you saw right through him. Most people didn’t pay any mind to him. Didn’t notice just how in his own head he was. He was constantly thinking, hardly able to just…stop doing that.

A laugh escaped him and he shook his head. “Oh, I’m just relishing in the thought of absolutely ravaging you.”

“How about you make that thought a reality?” You kissed him again, causing his whole body to melt into you as you grinded into him again. He let out another growl, pinning you to the bed as he started to kiss and bite at your neck again. You squirm underneath him, letting out moans and pressing against him.

His hand travelled down your side and your own breathing hitched with anticipation. 

Suddenly, he pulled away, moving to sit against the wall as he grabbed a drink off the nightstand. Probably from pregaming earlier. He leaned back with a lazy smile on his face. “Back to the wall with a drink in my hand?” He downed what was in the cup, tossing it to the side as he grinned widely. “Let the show begin.”

You looked at him, surely not knowing exactly what he meant by that. That was okay - you would soon enough.

“Stand.” You obeyed like an obedient animal, standing immediately.  “Turn.” You did. “Back it up, baby, ride.” He leaned forward to wrap his arms around your waist and pull you over his lap. “Ride.” You leaned your head back, working your way onto his cock. “Riiiide,” he groaned slowly as you took him fully. It took some work, but you were able to take all of him in one go.

You’re so tight and so perfect. He almost couldn’t take it. He pulled you back to him, his mouth next to your ear. He’d never felt so good inside of someone. Hell, most of the time, people couldn’t take all of him. Or they’d end up just finishing from the penetration alone and be done. “You know, one step too late…” He chuckled softly, his thoughts trailing off as a new one formed. He was panting and not exactly speaking coherently. He was so excited and so extremely turned on that he couldn’t think straight. “And I never told you…that I can’t take another disappointment…” You started moving your hips, immediately driving him insane. He grabbed a fistful of your hair, pulling it roughly.

You cried out, head falling back on his shoulder. “Are you saying you’re disappointed, sir,” you panted, relentless in your movements as you looked at him out of the corner of your eye. A small chuckle escaped with a shake of his head. “Far from it, but hopefully you can keep up with me.” Usually, people tapped out after the first round. Or even after barely beginning. It was all so…disappointing. He bit onto your shoulder, squeezing your hip. A moan escaped from you. “This is only the first round, after all.”

You looked at him, not ceasing your movements. A grin spread across your face as you looked back at him. “Let’s see if you can keep up with me.” That was the second time you used his own words against him almost immediately.

He blinked, but wasn’t able to be shocked for too long before he groaned. You worked his cock like a pro but with your mouth and riding him. Were you actually like a whore like he had teased?

“Let’s see if you can keep that attitude.”

“I think I remember saying I’m at your disposal.”

Fuck, you really knew what to say, didn’t you? You knew just what to say to drive him absolutely wild. “That you did,” he mumbled, placing a hand at the back of your neck as you leaned forward to really start working him.

He moved quickly. Next thing you knew, you were being pushed into the bed with him absolutely drilling into you. An animalistic growl ripped from his throat as he finally wasn’t able to hold back anymore. He felt like an animal in heat and you were the only cure to that. It was a complete turn of personality from just moments ago. He had felt something finally snap and that was it.

He pistoned his hips in and out of you, slapping your ass and groping your thighs. 

As you continued to moan and mewl under him, he realized you kept calling him ‘sir.’. Then it dawned on him that you didn’t know his name. Both of you were panting and groaning loudly, helplessly gripping at each other. He moved his hand to the back of your head as he grabbed a fistful of your hair and pulled you up flush with his body. “Breathing and grasping…” He chuckled breathlessly against you. You cried out in absolute bliss, your eyes rolling back with pleasure.

“All leads to another messy ending…just how I like.” He kissed you. That’s exactly what he wanted. Another messy ending. An ending he wanted. Sometimes, he never even finished, but you had already milked one out of him tonight and he knew you were about to milk another.

He pushed you back down into the bed, feeling his own movements growing more sporadic as the coil in his stomach tightened. Then he felt you clench around him as you came with a cry. It sent him over the edge once more. With one last, very hard, thrust, he came hard inside of you - filling you up and then some. You let out a long whine as he did so, music to his ears.

Oh yeah. He was absolutely keeping you around.

“Mmm…” His mind was spinning and he felt himself already ready for another round. “Think you can still go?” His adrenaline was running wild and the beast not quite sated.

He slowly pulled out of you, watching as his own seed leaked from you. He sat on the bed, panting heavily, letting you catch your breath and choose whether or not you could go on. He watched you for a long moment. Your post climax face, your heavy panting. He just hoped that you’d be able to go again, but this was honestly the longest anyone has ever lasted.

“If you’re too exhausted-” He was cut off as he felt your hands on his chest. His eyes widened as he looked at you, gasping as you pushed him down and straddled him. You had a feral look in your eye that made his heart race. “Who said I was too exhausted?” You licked your lips, leaning down to look at him with a half lidded, lust filled expression. “I believe we had said we would go all night, no?” The purr to your voice…fuck. He might just fall in love with you at this rate.

He pulled you into another sloppy kiss. “How shall I take you next?” he asked, panting heavily. 

“With your back against the wall? With your face buried in the pillow?” He grinned at you, wondering just how many different ways he’d be able to take you tonight.

A hum came from you, one that seemed to be thinking. “We can just see where things take us, yeah? I’m sure we’ll end up doing both anyway.” You grinned at him and by golly, he was absolutely sold. Your smile, your moans, the way you spoke to him, everything about you…it’s like you were made for him.

He silently thanked whatever the hell it was out there that looked over the world for granting him you. He suddenly felt your hand around his cock as you started to stroke it and he groaned, his own eyes rolling back. “I could die by your cock and I’d be happy,” you purred, looking up at him through your eyelashes.

“Die by my cock, huh?” He trailed his hands up your sides, one of them around your neck as he squeezed lightly. Will I see you cold? Will I feel you heartless?” You just smiled coyly at him, stroking him faster and causing him to lose his focus. He was having a hard time holding his calm demeanor together. 

It wasn’t long before he had you in his arms, pinned up against the wall as he railed up into you. You were desperately clawing and scratching at his back. He was pretty sure you might have broken his skin, but he gladly welcomed the light sting. Something to remember the night by.

Once more the room was filled with the sound of skin slapping skin and both of your moans. He didn’t feel sorry for any of the neighbors, he wanted people to hear just how good of a fuck you were. It gave him a thrill. He didn’t plan on letting you go now that he’s had you.

He slammed into you. “You stupid.” Again. “Fuckin’.” Again. “Bitch.” With each thrust, you cried out, your eyes rolling into the back of your head. He paused for a moment as you cried out, knowing he could get a little carried away, but you looked at him as if you were absolutely wasted. He supposed you were probably cock drunk.

“Fuckin’ bitch, did I say you could stop?” you slurred at him. His eyes widened and he felt his heart race once more as he started back up again. Hearing you call him such names really riled him up.

He knew after tonight he was taking you away with him.

[honey-beann]

Ruiner, Ruination (RK900 X Reader)

Chapter 8: An Uneasy Aftermath - Constellations and Well-Paired Colors

Series Masterlist

Chapter Synopsis:

Part 1 of a multiple part special in which Reader and Nines struggle to manage their concern for one another now that their respective injuries have forced them both to realize how destructible the other truly is.

This chapter includes a realization, a promise, a shower, some sharing, a minor wardrobe malfunction, and a great deal of longing and overthinking from both our beloved reader and everyone's favorite android.

AKA - Reader and Nines each contemplate how the other makes them feel, and struggle to reach the necessary conclusions afterward.

Word Count: 5,863

"Detective, I can assure you that while I appreciate your concern, there is really no reason for you to supervise me. My systems are entirely operational, including those involving the temporary parts installed earlier today."

You rolled your eyes at your partner while he attempted to persuade you to go home for the fifth time in three minutes as you stood in his kitchen, inspecting the pristine surface of the counter there with what was almost awe.

Of course, you hadn't expected your android partner's apartment to be dirty by any means, there was almost no reason for it to be given the fact that he didn't eat, drink, or sleep, but even so, this was just absurd.

There wasn't even a speck of dust anywhere, the cabinets were stocked with easy to grab nutritional food sources (likely so he could ensure you always had breakfast should you forget to eat it in the mornings before work), and the fridge was sparkling clean despite the thirium drinks found within, which you were almost certain Nines must have been gifted. He didn't strike you as a man who chose to consume literally anything, android beverages or media alike, for pleasure.

Still, even despite your fairly apparent surprise, you willed yourself to turn around and cross your arms at your partner before replying to his previous persuasions.

"Nines, you put me down as your emergency contact, let them call me, watched as I embarrassed myself after thinking that something terrible had happened to you, and then you revealed that you had weaseled your way into my personal health files weeks ago like it was a totally normal thing to do. No matter what you say to me, I'm not going anywhere, because I'll be damned if you don't learn some kind of lesson by being forced to have me babysit you for the night."

Nines gave a hum in response, a slight smirk pulling at the corners of his mouth as he shrugged and turned to make his way toward the living room,

"Whatever you say, Detective, but I don't think I loathe your presence quite enough to view it as punishment. You are getting there, though."

You scoffed at that and followed him into the next room, fighting the urge to gape at the cleanliness of this one as well as you watched your partner move to take a seat in an armchair nearby, one long leg crossing over the other as a hand moved to rest upon his knee in a way that had you staring at his fingers for what you imagined was far too long before you finally caught yourself and looked away, cheeks dusted a light pink as you cleared your throat.

"Well even if I wanted to, we both know I can’t just leave. You heard the technician, Nines, someone needs to stay with you for at least the next six hours to observe you and make sure there are no negative reactions to the temporary parts she had to install while you wait for the new ones to be manufactured and shipped out. That temporary circulatory pump is a huge concern, and you need to be careful not to overwhelm it so you don't risk damaging your thirium pump. She already told you how serious it could be if you aren't careful, especially in these first few hours as your systems get used to the less functional temporary parts." 

Nines all but rolled his eyes at your words as he leaned further back against the chair, watching you intently as he did so,

"The chances of me becoming overwhelmed, be it physically or emotionally, are incredibly slim, Detective. I was not built to experience such things."

"You also weren't built with temporary parts meant for an entirely different and non-military model of android, Nines."

You countered easily, choosing that moment to start looking around the living room rather than just stand in its doorway.

Carefully, as if afraid you might create a mess in the area simply by virtue of being there, you made your way over to a wall fitted with a large fireplace, and opened your mouth to comment on how dramatic it looked all decked out in black wrought iron, when you suddenly caught sight of the mirror that rested on the mantle and halted before you could say a single word.

In all your eagerness to bring Nines home and get him to let up on his insistence that your presence was unwarranted, you had completely forgotten about all the blue blood that decorated you and your clothing.

It stained your white button up, made dark marks on your brown pants, and was sprayed in disorganized spatters across your neck, cheeks, forehead, and hair.

But the most notable stain of all was the nearly perfect handprint, devoid of any fingerprints, that was wrapped around your right wrist.

You stared at that handprint, hands shaking slightly at your sides as you swallowed thickly, trying to keep the sound of a bullet hitting strong plastic out of your mind as you fought off the tears that sprang to your eyes at the memory.

Just this morning you had celebrated the fresh absence of your sling,

And only three hours afterward you had been hovering above your partner’s body, struggling to stop the blue blood from seeping out of the open bullet wound just below where his ribs would have been located if he’d had any.

And now you were standing in that same partner's apartment at 4:00pm, staring at the way that his blood covered your clothing and bare skin.

Everything had happened so fast, and you felt your mind reel as you tried your best to keep up with the events that had occurred throughout the day thus far.

Your vision grew cloudy as you stood there, swaying slightly in front of the fireplace, staring deep into your own reflection unblinkingly.

That is, until you felt a familiar hand graze the sleeve along your right wrist, instantly bringing you back to Earth.

There, standing at your side, was Nines, perfectly healthy and glancing down at you with what almost appeared to be worry.

"There is a shower in the bathroom down the hall, the second door on your right. You're welcome to use it."

You took a brief moment to consider how the hell your partner had figured out your inner thoughts so easily before brushing off the confusion and turning to face him better, offering him a small and slightly fragile smile,

"That would be great, but I don't really know how much good it would do me. When I checked earlier the only spare clothing in my trunk was a pair of jeans, which means I won't have a shirt to replace this one..."

You trailed off as you looked down towards that handprint once more, though you snapped back to attention immediately when Nines spoke up,

"If it is any consolation, Detective, I do not believe the blue blood present on your shirt will be visible for much longer."

You sighed in response, trying not to look too uncomfortable at his attempt to provide some semblance of comfort as you spoke,

"I know but... there's just something about it being there, even if I can't see it, that just doesn't sit right with me."

Nines was silent for a moment before he gave a sudden and rather sharp nod at your words.

"I will see what I can do. In the meantime, though, I really must insist that you take a shower. The longer thirium remains on the skin, the harder it becomes to scrub off."

You shuddered slightly at the thought of not being able to get your partner's blood off of you, and gave an almost immediate nod of agreement,

"Okay, yeah, then I should definitely shower, but you've gotta promise me you won't just leave while I'm in there."

Nines' lips curled upward ever so slightly at your words, amused by your persistent concern for his well-being but plenty willing to give in to your foolish requests if it meant you becoming more relaxed.

He hummed,

"I promise, Detective. Is that all?"

You considered his question for a few seconds before giving a slow and thoughtful nod in response, 

"Yeah, I think so. Anything I should know about the bathroom?"

Nines replied immediately, without requiring even a single moment of contemplation,

"The lock is on the door handle, the fan is to the left of the light switch, and you can lower the blinds to the window by pressing the button beside them, though I'm sure you aren't nearly tall enough for anyone to see anything indecent from the parking lot. In addition to this, you can find shampoo, conditioner, body wash, and most other common hygiene products beneath the sink. Feel free to utilize anything you find there. When you exit the shower, you should find two towels hung up to your right. Both are clean, though I do utilize the black one for myself when necessary, so be aware of that if the idea of using a towel I have used in the past causes you any discomfort."

Surprised by the sudden influx information, you spent a moment blinking rapidly before remembering that you were probably supposed to give some form of response to that,

"Oh okay, uh, thanks for letting me know. I'll see you after?"

Nines gave a hum of what you assumed was agreement before he began to walk toward the hallway he had mentioned you could find the bathroom in previously.

He pushed open the door to said bathroom and flicked on the light in two extremely fluid motions before continuing down the hall until he reached a closed door at the very end.

Said door opened to reveal a quick glance at a bed donning a soft looking black comforter and many plush looking gray silk covered pillows before Nines stepped in, his large form obscuring your view of the space as he made his way over to what you assumed was his closet towards a wall that you could not see from the angle you were standing at.

You watched for a few more moments after Nines walked out of view before you snapped yourself out of it and stepped onto the cool white tile of the bathroom, shutting the door quietly behind you as you took in the space.

Shining white tiles with dark green accents covered the floor, and a similarly green backsplash was present in the area between the gold faucet sink and the gold trimmed mirror, both of which shone brilliantly as they caught the light, clearly very rarely used, and kept pristine despite that.

God, you were beginning to wonder if Nines might be even more of an eerily neat guy than you'd previously thought.

Deeming that consideration far too unimportant to dwell on further, you squatted down to better reach the cabinet beneath the sink, opening it to find a rather large number of toiletries stashed beneath.

Multiple rolls of toilet paper stacked neatly, a few bottles of shaving cream, a metal razor handle with disposable single blades, two bamboo hair brushes, a few packaged toothbrushes with different bottles of toothpaste standing beside them, some dental floss, a large bottle of mouthwash, dry shampoo, deodorant, and a container with different sorted sections containing things like hair ties, tweezers, scrunchies, barrettes, bobby pins, a sewing kit, and even menstrual products within its designated cubbies.

But what caught your attention above all else was the actual showering supplies, which consisted of your favorite bar of body wash, a biodegradable mesh soap bar bag, your favorite shampoo and conditioner, the exact scent of shaving cream from the very same brand that you always used at home, and the body scrub that went along with it.

You stared at these products for a while, taken aback at the idea that Nines had somehow figured out what you liked and purchased these things for you to have at his home should you ever need them, only to brush the idea off immediately, your cheeks burning at the thought.

Of course he hadn't done all this just for you, at best he had figured out what you used and assumed it was typical for all other humans as well, leading him to buy these things in case someone ever needed to take a shower at his place (excluding himself, of course).

You stood, shower supplies in hand, and placed them on the counter of the sink for a few moments as you moved to turn the water on, taking note of the two towels, one black and one green, that hung from the rungs. 

'Both are clean, though I do utilize the black one for myself when necessary, so be aware of that if the idea of using a towel I have used before causes you any discomfort.'

Is what Nines had told you earlier on, and you swallowed thickly at the idea of sharing a towel with your partner before shaking your head in embarrassment, desperate to rid yourself of the thought as you picked up your supplies once more, placing them down carefully where they belonged in the shower before beginning the process of stripping down, trying not to pay attention to the blue blood all over your clothes and body as you did so.

And then, after giving the temperature of the water one final check, you stepped in, giving an unintentional and almost surprising sigh of relief as you did so.

The water was hot and soothing against your tense muscles, and for just a few moments, you allowed yourself time to bask in that comfort despite the stressors awaiting you back out in the real world.

Meanwhile, unbeknownst to you, as you began the process of scrubbing semi-dried blue blood off of your skin, Nines was exiting the master suite, having laid a white button up across his neat black comforter to await your need for it.

The shirt would likely be rather large on you, given that it was one of his, but since you claimed to have a pair of your own jeans in the car, he was confident that your outfit wouldn't be so excessively unfitted that it would look unkempt.

He sighed and looked toward his wrist to check his watch, a rather human habit he’d developed despite his constant ability to know the time at a moment’s notice without the use of a device that attached to his body.

It was 4:35 now, and you had only been in the shower for around five minutes.

He glanced towards the bathroom door, the dull slap of water hitting tile the only sound emanating from your general vicinity.

He then looked at the door to his apartment, considering his options.

He had made a promise not to leave, and intended to keep it, but even so, he knew it made almost no sense to wait for you to exit the shower just for him to go down and get you your jeans anyway, and it wasn't as if you could do so yourself without new pants to wear down to the parking lot below.

Plus, he had only promised not to leave, and you had neglected to define exactly what "leaving" entailed.

Nines gave a subtle smirk at that, deciding that with that logic, you had no ground to stand on as long as he didn't actually leave the property, which he had absolutely no intention of doing in the process of collecting your spare pair of jeans.

So, with that, the android made a beeline for the front door, grabbing both his house keys as well as your car keys before he stepped out into the hallway and locked his front door behind him.

He took the steps slowly and at his leisure, though he notably went two at a time the entire way down until he reached the entrance to his apartment complex, which allowed him access to the gated parking area.

Once outside, it was easy to unlock your car and locate your pants within the trunk before shutting and locking everything all over again, your jeans slung over his forearm the same way that his shirt had been previously as he leaned against your car and looked up toward his apartment, where he was shocked to see that you hadn't bothered with closing the blinds at the window that looked into the shower.

Thankfully, he had been right about the pane being too high up on the wall to reveal anything one might consider intimate, but even still, Nines found himself staring as you ran adept fingers through your hair, rinsing the shampoo from it with your eyes peacefully shut against the consistent barrage of water raining down from the shower head above.

He continued to watch in an almost curious manner for a few more moments before realizing you were likely close to finishing, a fact which caused him to move a bit faster up the stairs during his return to the apartment, unlocking the door with ease before stepping back inside and closing the door swiftly and silently behind him.

Nines listened closely, hearing the familiar sound of water on tile as he made his way down the hall and over to his bed to set your jeans down alongside his button up.

There.

You would likely be done any minute now, and when you were, you could -

Nines’ inner thoughts were cut off by the sound of your phone ringing from somewhere across the apartment, and as he focused more on the noise emanating from the device in order to find it, he felt his brow wrinkle in curiosity.

Where could you have left that?

As Nines began what would be a very short and simple search for your cell phone, you were finishing up in the shower, fighting back a shiver as you lightly ran the soap bag containing your favorite bar soap across your torso, the unfamiliar texture tickling your skin in an unexpected manner.

The perception of yet another foreign sensation had you thinking back to all of the other unfamiliar feelings you’d experienced lately, though one in particular seemed stuck at the front of your mind.

Without even realizing what you were doing, you allowed your thoughts to wander aimlessly to the way that Nines' hands had gently cradled your hips as he’d lifted you up to the ladder earlier that morning, and how similar the memory of those hands felt to the water that was now caressing your skin, causing light blue liquid to spill down the drain as it washed away the blue blood that had stubbornly remained despite your persistent scrubbing.

Suddenly, broken out of your reverie by a slight temperature shift in the water, you startled, cheeks hot with embarrassment when you realized what you’d been thinking of. 

God, what was up with you lately?

You had been thinking about Nines almost nonstop, particularly when it came to your more physical interactions, like when he had helped you in and out of your dress for the gala a few weeks back, or when you had grazed his neck at the same aforementioned event and received a rather surprising reaction from him in response.

But even still, despite the memories of the other physical moments that had occurred between the two of you, the recollected feeling of his strong hands gripping powerfully onto your hips as he’d lifted you up with an almost practiced ease had your mind reeling and your heart racing for reasons you were fairly certain you didn't want to consider further.

And even though you tried to convince yourself that these reactions were completely normal, you still found that guilt was getting the better of you.

This was Nines you were thinking about, the cold, stubborn, and calculating military model android that you called your partner, who, despite others’ perceptions of him, felt a great deal of responsibility and worry for your well-being, as well as the well-beings of many more on top of that.

You thought back to when he had been shot earlier that morning, how he had comforted you even while he was so seriously injured and in pain, and the fact that he had done so as if it were the only possible option.

In Nine's mind, ensuring your safety, be it emotional or physical, was of the utmost importance, even when his personal safety was at risk, and as much as he would likely deny that verbally, his actions spoke volumes.

Nines had been willing to endure what most would consider to be an immense agony with a straight face just to make you feel less worried for him,

And here you were, in his bathroom, unable to stop yourself from thinking of the way his hands had felt as they’d wrapped easily around your hips, his torso just inches behind your back while he’d lifted you mere moments later, that usual air of confidence somehow both annoying and reassuring all at once as he’d done so.

Fuck, you really needed to get a grip.

Grabbing the shower valve dial in a manner that could only be described as aggressive, you held back a squeak as you forced the temperature down further, dousing yourself in much colder water in an effort to end your unwelcome thoughts.

Just moments later though, you failed to hold back a second squeak at the sound of knuckles rapping thrice against the wooden door, before Nines' voice followed shortly thereafter,

"Detective, please come out at your earliest convenience. There is something that requires your immediate attention."

At those words, you found yourself cursing under your breath before reaching to turn the water off entirely, grabbing for a towel and wrapping it around yourself all the while.

Hurriedly, and with an almost impressive level of speed considering how slippery your environment was, you stepped out of the shower and onto the mat below before allowing your feet to press against the cool tile as you made your way over to the door, previously worn clothing forgotten in a heap below the towel rack as you reached to unlock and open it, allowing a gust of steam to exit the bathroom and pour out into the hallway instead.

There, standing against the wall opposite the bathroom, stood Nines, and you watched as his eyes scanned the length of your body before halting suddenly, as if he realized too late how that may have looked.

You chose to ignore it.

"What's going on?"

You all but panted out, tightening your towel dress around your chest and ensuring it was secure even as you spoke, suddenly far more aware of your lack of clothing now that Nines was watching you.

"You received a phone call regarding a case nearby. Our presence has been requested at the scene due to the state of the victim and the proximity of the crime in comparison to our current location."

Your eyes widened as Nines spoke, and you struggled to form a response as you realized what he was saying,

"Wait, but we were supposed to be taken off of the page list for the night after what happened earlier today. Was this some kind of mistake?"

Nines shrugged his shoulders,

"I am unable to discern the level of intent that was had by dispatch when they requested our support at the scene. I simply stated we would arrive as soon as is feasible."

You gawked at your partner's words, crossing your arms over the exposed skin of your chest as you gave him a look that could only be described as pure exasperation,

"Your technician said you needed to take at least the rest of the night off, why wouldn’t you just say that we're unavailable?"

Nines gave a dismissive hum, his hand moving in a manner that suggested the dilemma you had brought up was of very little importance.

"I saw no reason to turn down the case, as all that would do is delay the inevitable."

You scoffed, adjusting your towel again to ensure it was firmly tucked into itself before you placed a hand on your hip,

"And what exactly is the inevitable in this situation? That you blow a fuse trying to interrogate a suspect because you refuse to just take it easy until your new parts come in?"

Nines shook his head, replying as if your question had been far more sincere than it actually was,

"No Detective, the inevitable is that the department sends in someone else in our stead, they neglect to solve the case, and we are left to deal with the mess that they made in the process of their failure."

You rolled your eyes, but gave a relenting sigh that your partner knew meant you no longer had any hope of not joining him at the scene,

"There are literally three other people in the android crimes division, Nines, how much mess could they possibly make?"

The android in question gave you a rather pointed look and took a step back before gesturing toward his room,

"I am confident that I don't need to answer that question for you, Detective. Now, if you're finished in the bathroom, you're more than welcome to use the bedroom at the end of the hall to change. I took it upon myself to collect your jeans and find you a shirt while you freshened up."

You glared at your partner before begrudgingly agreeing, briefly heading back into the bathroom to grab the clothing you had abandoned on the floor previously to ensure that you would have undergarments to wear, since you severely doubted Nines' ability to procure those for you.

With that, you started making your way down the hall, taking note of the way that the android was quick to follow. 

"You broke your promise about leaving you know."

You stated matter of factly as you passed the threshold to the master bedroom, trying not to look as in awe of the large space as you actually were when you turned to face your partner, who tilted his head slightly in response to your words,

"On the contrary, Detective, I was actually very careful to keep it. I neglected to leave the property, and therefore did not leave in any meaningful sense of the word."

You rolled your eyes and placed a hand on the door, preparing to shut it in order to give yourself some privacy,

"Whatever you say, Nines. Is there anything else you need, or can I get changed now?"

Nines shook his head,

“No, there is nothing else that I require, Detective. I’ll wait here in the hallway in case there’s anything you may need.”

You gave a slight nod and muttered a soft "Thanks", before you closed the door, sighing gently while stepping back to sit at the edge of the large California King sized bed, the black comforter that covered it feeling slightly cool against your skin as you began to dry your hair to the best of your ability.

After finishing up with that, you stood and prepared to get dressed, even though the shirt Nines had provided would clearly be big on you.

You started with your undergarments before moving on to your pants, stepping into the familiar clothing with ease before you tugged the large white button up Nines had given you over your head, immediately noting just how soft the fabric felt against your skin, and how despite it clearly being clean, it still had that faint smell that reminded you so thoroughly of your partner.

Turning, you looked in the mirror, letting out a quiet chuckle at the sight of yourself in Nines' shirt, the sleeves hanging well past your hands in a way that made you look like a child playing dress up again.

You shook your head at the situation you’d found yourself in, tucking the front of the shirt into your jeans before threading your belt through the loops, doing your best to look as professional as possible despite your lackluster clothing options.

You were just about to glance toward the mirror and look at your reflection one final time when a set of three firm knocks on the door brought your attention elsewhere.

"You can come in!"

You shouted back, hearing the gentle click of the door opening just a few moments later as Nines slowly stepped into the bedroom, his gaze falling to your new clothing immediately.

Laughing a bit, you held your arms out and gave a slow spin,

"How do I look? Do android tailored shirts suit me?"

You asked sarcastically, watching as Nines cocked a brow and stepped forward, his gaze flitting across your form as he fully took in the sight of you, before finally, he opened his mouth to speak,

"The clothing is plenty suitable as long as you feel comfortable wearing it."

You rolled your eyes a bit at that, shrugging as you pushed the sleeves up towards your elbows messily, crinkling the fabric in disorganized patterns that had both sleeves falling back down towards your wrists unevenly as a result.

Nines all but scoffed at your actions,

"And how do you intend to inspect a crime scene with your sleeves getting in the way, Detective?"

You shrugged dismissively as you began to search for some sort of hair tie in the pocket of your jeans

"Eh, I'll roll them up on the drive over."

You grinned to yourself as you found an elastic in your back pocket, preparing to turn toward your partner to finish your conversation when you felt a light tug at the fabric of your sleeve, which had begun to dangle off your hand once more.

Surprised, you looked toward your left arm, where the sensation was coming from, only to find that Nines was holding it between two sets of fingertips, seemingly contemplating the fabric before he looked up at you expectantly,

"May I, Little Mouse?"

You blanched at the now familiar nickname before regaining your composure and nodding slowly, barely resisting the urge to sigh in exasperation,

"If you really think you have to, then sure, but I can do it myself, you know."

You clarified quietly, your voice sounding more than just a little breathless as you spoke.

"I believe you're perfectly capable, if that's what you're worried about, Detective. I simply believe my assistance might speed up the process for us both."

Not sure how to reply, you just nodded silently, ignoring the quickening pace of your heart as your partner stepped forward, now much closer as he lifted your hand up to his shoulder so he could roll the fabric of your borrowed shirt sleeve up your arm in tight and even folds. He continued with this until finally, he reached the area just above your elbow and stopped, using the button tab to hold the sleeve in place before he gestured for your right arm, placing your hand similarly upon his shoulder before he began the process once more.

You watched closely all the while, feeling almost in awe of Nines as you studied the way his face looked up close, counting the constellations of freckles that dotted his artificial flesh, and taking note of the way that his jaw shifted as he concentrated heavily on the task at hand, completely unaware of your watchful gaze as he worked.

However, what you were entirely unaware of yourself, was just how focused on you the android truly was.

Despite his consistent perfection when it came to the task at hand, his mind was much more occupied with the way you looked in his clothing.

His shirt, that had been tailored explicitly for him and no one else.

He had never considered before that something made solely for him could look so right on someone else, much less his smaller human partner, but even so, he found himself enamored by the way your fingers had wrapped around the sleeves as they had dangled below your hands, and the way the shirt seemed to flutter about your body even after you had tucked the front of it into your jeans.

But above all else, his mind was stuck on how well the color of the fabric looked against your skin despite its neutral tones, as if you had been the person made to wear it all along.

He broke himself out of his internal reverie just as he began buttoning the second sleeve in place, his artificial breaths that he hadn't consciously chosen to pause starting up once more as he rooted himself firmly in reality again.

Despite him clearly being finished, the two of you remained in that position for just a little while longer, him with his fingers brushing gently against the skin of your arm, and you with your hand holding loosely to his shoulder, your faces suddenly seeming much closer than just seconds before as he lowered his gaze from your sleeve in order to meet your eyes, the intensity of his piercing gray/blues shocking you for a moment before you managed to regain your composure, clearing your throat lightly as you lowered your hand from his shoulder hesitantly, your gaze slowly dropping away from his and instead moving to the mirror to the right of you, where you found your reflections staring back, unyielding in their persistent attention.

Suddenly though, you watched as Nines' LED briefly circled yellow just seconds before your phone gave it's familiar notifying chirp of a work page, causing you to groan and look around for it, only to have Nines give a subtle smirk and roll of his eyes before pulling it out of his pocket and handing it to you with only a silent quirk of his brow that nearly made you want to punch that slightly smug look off his face.

He always found amusement in how easily you lost things or sometimes even outright forgot them, leaving him to remember their importance and carry them on his person in order to ensure the two of you remained at "peak efficiency".

You, on the other hand, were not nearly as big a fan of how often he'd been right regarding your persistent forgetfulness, even when you were actively trying to remember everything that you needed.

Sighing, you reached over to take your phone from your partner, mumbling out an annoyed “Thanks.” before you checked your most recent work notification and frowned, glancing up at the android standing before you,

"Are you sure you want to do this? We can just call out."

Nines didn't even seem to give your question any thought before he simply nodded and pulled your car keys from his pocket, spinning them around on his index finger casually,

"I'm sure, Detective. Is there anything else you need before we go?"

Letting out yet another sigh of pure exasperation, you shook your head, barely resisting the urge to roll your eyes as you replied,

"Nope, nothing else. Let's get this night over with."

AO3 Link

Series Masterlist

[lovelyleclercs]

Chapter Three- In Denial

Arthur Leclerc x Sofia Sine

-> Arthur finally learns the truth about Sofia's illness.

warnings- this chapter is a bit brutal, I'm not going to lie. Mentions of cancer, fainting, puking, Herve's passing, angry Arthur, crying, if you have read the original version of this story, you already know

word count: 2948

Sofia laid in bed, staring at her ceiling as she tried to build up some courage to get herself out of bed. It had been 7 days since her first treatment, and she was feeling the worst that she had felt all week. No matter what she tried to do to get more energy in her system to do even the simplest things, nothing seemed to be working.

As she glanced over at the clock, she noticed that it was nearly 8pm. She had gotten a text from Arthur earlier that day, asking if she would like to come out with him for dinner that night. Sofia had agreed, thinking that she would be strong enough to do so within a few hours time- she was very, very wrong.

Sofia grabbed her phone to send a text to Arthur, however as she was typing the message, she heard a snippet of his voice coming from downstairs. Sofia turned her focus to the conversation happening between Arthur and Charlotte, hoping that she would be able to understand what the two of them were saying to each other.

“She told me at like noon that she wanted to go out to dinner with me.. It’s the first time she has agreed to do anything in nearly a week..”

“I know Arthur, but she is really sick right now and I just don’t think it is a good idea for her to go out tonight. It’s not safe for her…”“What do you mean it’s not safe?”

“Arthur, it isn’t my place to tell you what’s going on with her. She is going through a lot right now and she is scared, sick and hurting. You need to understand that the best thing for her right now is to stay at home.”

“Well can I spend some time with her upstairs in her room then?”

Charlotte nodded, knowing that Arthur would go up there regardless. “That’s fine. I’m not sure if she is awake or not though.”

Without another word, Arthur made his way up to Sofia’s room, knocking on the door gently. “Sof? It’s me… Charlotte said that going out tonight wasn’t a good idea.. So I figured I could just hang with you here tonight? We could watch a movie?”

Sofia looked over at the door, knowing that a very clueless Arthur was standing on the other side, dying to see her with his own two eyes. “Come in”

When Arthur walked in, he closed the door behind him and made his way over to Sofia’s bed, sitting down on the edge of it as he looked up at her with worried eyes. “Sof? Are you ok? Charlotte was just saying some things that made me worried… What’s going on?”

Sofia couldn’t look him in the eyes at that moment. “Arthur I-”“I’m your best friend, Sof. You can tell me anything… I’m really worried about you… please…”

“How about we watch a movie? Ok? I’m really tired…”Arthur looked at Sofia, noticing how exhausted she was just from their small exchange. While he wanted answers, he also didn’t want to put Sofia through anything else as it was obvious to him she had been having a rough week. With a hesitant nod, Arthur climbed into bed and opened his arms for Sofia, allowing her to cuddle up to him, resting her head on his chest. “I promise… I will tell you eventually.. It’s just a hard thing for me to process and telling you would make it all so… real. You know?”

Arthur nodded and rubbed Sofia’s back gently, his eyes never leaving the TV screen as he listened to her talk. “I know, Sof. It’s just hard because I know you’re struggling and I can’t help you if I don’t know what is going on.. But part of me thinks that’s why you don’t want to tell me what’s going on.”

Sofia stared at the wall across from her as she pressed her head closer to Arthur’s chest, allowing her to listen to his heartbeat closely. “I’m sorry, Art, I know it’s not an easy thing for you to understand…”

“Let’s just watch the movie, ok? You will tell me when you want to, and that is ok. For now, lets just drop it before we get upset with each other”

Sofia nodded and pulled the comforter over the two of them, her attention turning towards the TV where ‘The Age of Adaline’ played. It was one of Sofia’s absolute favorite movies and one that Arthur had grown to love as well.

As Sofia watched Adaline sit in a diner with her daughter, she couldn’t help but notice how heavy her eyes had begun to feel. Even just the smallest conversation with Arthur had taken everything out of her, leaving her weak and exhausted. She felt her body relax against Arthur’s, her exhaustion slowly taking over her as she drifted asleep. Arthur knew better than to try and leave now. If Sofia fell asleep on him, he was spending the night at her house, no questions asked. It was sort of a mutual agreement the pair had made a few years back.

“You’re getting tired, Art. Maybe I should go home…” Sofia said as she played with Arthur’s hair a bit, trying to move her legs out from underneath his head. It had only been two days since Herve’s passing and Sofia hadn’t left Arthur’s side since. The two of them had spent the past 48 hours hidden up in his bedroom with little to no sleep as they both mourned the loss of Herve. They had turned on a random movie for some background noise and Arthur had laid in Sofia’s lap, crying the pain away as he thought of his father again.

“Please… don’t leave me. Stay here…” Arthur begged, his hand squeezing Sofia’s tightly as a few more tears slid down his cheek.

Sofia looked down into his eyes, wiping a few tears off of his cheek as she nodded, agreeing to stay by his side. “Ok, ok. I’m not going anywhere, Art. I’m right here” she whispered

Arthur sat up and laid down, Sofia following suit to allow Arthur to cuddle up to her. As she laid on her back with Arthur cuddled into her side, she gently rubbed his back. “I love you, Art. We will get through this, I promise. One step at a time.”

Arthur nodded, wiping a few of his tears away as he finally calmed himself down. “Can we make a promise to each other?” he whispered, his voice still shaky from crying.

“Of course, what is it?”“If one of us is going through a hard time, we stay the night with each other? I feel like I sleep so much better when you’re around”

Sofia smiled a little, knowing that she also always seemed to sleep a bit better with the comfort of Arthur being near. “Of course, Art. I love that idea..”

Arthur held his pinky finger up to Sofia, indicating that he wanted to seal the promise. Sofia locked her finger with Arthur’s and smiled. “I get to break your pinky if you break it!”

Sudden movement from Sofia snapped Arthur out of his thoughts, all of his attention turning towards her as he watched her make her way to the bathroom. “Sof?” he asked, but received no response in return.

Arthur got out of bed and made his way over to Sofia, just in time to catch her as she had become too weak to stand. “Oh my god, Sof… Are you ok?” he asked as he held onto Sofia as tightly as he could.

Sofia laid her head back against his shoulder, her eyes closed as she gave him a gentle nod. All of the commotion caused Charles and Charlotte to appear out of their room. “What is going on out here?” Charlotte mumbled as she rubbed her eyes, still half asleep.

“Arthur.. I need to talk to you.. In my room please..” Sofia said as she looked over at Charles and Charlotte, indicating that it was time to tell Arthur the truth. Hiding it from him was becoming too much, and she couldn’t keep pretending like she was ok anymore. Charlotte gave her a small, reassuring nod before heading back into her room with Charles.

“Sof, you just practically fainted in my arms, you can’t just act like everything is ok, we need to get you to the hospital or something!”

“Art, please. Can I please just speak to you in my room…” Sofia pleaded, looking into his eyes as she squeezed his hand tightly. After a few moments, Arthur had finally given her a small nod and helped her walk back into her room.

Sofia sat down on her bed and motioned Arthur to come sit down beside her. When Arthur was situated in his spot on the bed, Sofia took a deep breath. No part of this conversation was going to be easy. She knew that. But it needed to happen. She grabbed Arthur’s hand and looked up at him, tears already forming in her eyes. “I’ve been avoiding telling you for weeks because I.. I don't want you to drop everything to take care of me.”

“You’re stalling, Sof. What is going on..”

“I’m sick, Arthur. I have cancer…”

Arthur’s heart sank. He had already lost his father to this horrible illness, and now he had to watch Sofia go through the same thing? “How long have you known..”

Sofia looked down, knowing that answering his question would only upset him more. She could lie to him, tell him that she only found out yesterday, but she knew that the truth would get out eventually and it would cause an even bigger uproar.

“How long, Sofia?!” Arthur asked, practically shouting at that point.

“Since the beginning of January at the doctor's visit I had when you were in Ibiza” Sofia said quietly, her eyes unable to meet his.

“You’ve known for over a month? And you decided not to tell me!?” Arthur shouted, looking at Sofia in complete disbelief. How could she keep this from him for so long??

Sofia looked up at him, tears falling down her cheeks. She was too weak to fight back, too weak to explain to him that she was sorry, and too weak to even get up to hug him and promise him that everything was going to be ok.

“Unbelievable! All this time I thought I did something wrong! Everytime you canceled on me I was convinced that I had said something to you that ruined our friendship, instead you were sitting at home fighting off cancer???”

As Sofia stared at him some more, wanting to say a million things but having no energy to do so, Arthur finally had enough and decided to grab his phone off of the bed before making his way to the door.

“Arthur… please…”

Before Sofia could say anything else, Arthur had walked out the door, making it obvious that he was in no mood to continue the conversation. Arthur made his way downstairs, being stopped by Charles just as he was about to walk out the door. “Mate, where are you going? It’s like.. 3am you shouldn’t be going out there this late”

Arthur looked over at Charles with tears in his eyes. “Did you know about this?”

“Know about what?”

“Sofia’s cancer diagnosis”

Charles looked at Arthur and nodded hesitantly. “I found out by accident. I wasn’t supposed to know”

Arthur just shook his head and let out a sarcastic laugh. “I’m so pissed off I could fucking punch something” he mumbled as he rested his elbows on the counter and put his face in his hands. “This isn’t fucking fair!” Arthur yelled as he began crying into his hands.

Charles sat down beside Arthur and rubbed his back a little. “I know. I don’t know how this is happening to another person we love and care about.. But it is.”

“She is twenty fucking years old, Charles. It’s not fair. She’s too young for this… she doesn’t deserve this.. I can’t lose her too.. Fuck!!” Arthur cried, allowing himself to completely break down in Charles’ arms. Arthur was never typically a vulnerable guy, but right now he needed comfort more than ever.

Just as Charles was about to say something, Sofia appeared in the doorway of the kitchen, her own face filled with tears as she watched Arthur fall apart. She had done this to him, she was the reasoning behind his pain- and she felt absolutely horrible for it. “A-art i-im sorry…” she whispered, looking at him from across the kitchen.

“Why… why didn’t you just tell me…” Arthur asked quietly as he lifted his head up and made eye contact with Sofia.

Sofia sniffled and took a few steps closer to him. “You start your first season of F2 soon.. I didn’t want you to drop everything for me…”

“Sofia, you are my best friend.. If something is wrong with you, I want to know about it!”

Sofia nodded a little “I know, Art. You are my best friend, and by far one of the most important people in my life. That’s why I was scared to tell you. I didn’t want you to treat me differently, I didn’t want you to worry, but most of all I didn’t want you to be reminded of everything you had to go through with papa.”

Arthur looked down at the floor, not knowing what else to say to her.“My intentions were never to hurt you, Art. I was only trying to protect you, but clearly I’ve done the one thing I didn’t want to do, and for that I’m sorry.”

There were a few moments of silence, neither Sofia or Arthur knowing what to say next. After thinking that their conversation was over, Sofia turned around and started making her way towards the kitchen door, only to be stopped by Arthur’s voice suddenly filling the room.

“You helped me so much when papa died, Sof. I want nothing more than to be able to help you through the hardest moment of your life.. To help you heal and get better, to help you through this horrible illness.. To help you feel comfortable and safe.. But I can’t do that if you aren’t honest with me. I’d be lying if I said I wasn't hurt right now.. I understand why you wanted to keep it from me but it doesn’t make it any easier to process…” Arthur said as he got up and made his way over to Sofia. When he reached her, he grabbed both of her hands gently and started rubbing small circles on the backs of her hands. “I want to know everything from here on out, ok. Every appointment, every update, everytime you feel gross, whenever you need comfort, whenever you want company.. All of it, Sof. I want to know about it all. Please…”

“Art, you have to foc-”

“Don’t even say I have to focus on racing right now. You quit your dream job to be by my side 24/7 when papa was sick. You gave up everything just to make sure that I wasn’t alone. I'd give up racing in a heartbeat if it meant that you didn’t have to go through this alone.”

At that point, Sofia had run out of things to say. There was no use in arguing the matter with Arthur- he was set on making sure he was by her side every step of the way. “My next treatment is in two days. Each treatment is about three hours long, after that I come home and rest until the next one.”

“I’ll be there. I promise. For now though, let's head back up to bed. You’re exhausted, and honestly so am I.”

With a quick nod, Sofia slowly started to make her way back to her room. She had used pretty much all of the energy she had to come downstairs in the first place, so she was pretty much worn out. Arthur obviously didn’t fail to notice how much Sofia had been struggling and in one quick swoop, he lifted her up into his arms. “I’ve got you, Sof” he whispered before placing a gentle kiss on her forehead.

Sofia laid her head on Arthur’s shoulder and wrapped her arms around his neck to secure herself a bit better as Arthur carried her up to her room. Arthur very gently placed her down into her bed and pulled the covers up over her.

“Is that good? Do you need anything else?”

Sofia shook her head and held her arms open for him. “Remember our promise?”

Arthur smiled a little and nodded before climbing into the other side of the bed, allowing Sofia to cuddle up to him as she wanted.

“Thank you” Sofia said quietly as she laid her head on Arthur’s chest.

“For what?”

“You had every right to walk out those doors today. To leave me in the dust and on my own to get through this. You were mad at me and at the universe, yet you chose to stay here and support me.”

Arthur rubbed Sofia’s back gently and sighed. “Sof, I could never leave you to fight this alone. Never. So don’t thank me.”

Sofia nodded and cuddled into him a bit more. “Get some sleep, Art. We need it..”

Arthur pulled the blankets over the two of them and turned out the light that was on next to him. “Goodnight, Sof.”

“Goodnight, Art.”

Chapter Four

taglist: @hammickk @Cl16msc47 @majkaftorek @04ashely16 @itsrogersstufff @polyjuiceslytherin @lizziebitch33 @viktorie16

[luna-writes-stuff]

Day 8: Forever Winter, Logan Howlett

Song link

Fanfic, fem!mutant(not specified)!Reader

Brief angst, hurt/comfort

Word count: 2632

Tw: Not proofread! Mention/description of concussions, descriptions of dizziness. References to combat. Mentions of loss (younger students). Self-blaming, drinking/alcohol. Use of painkillers (pills).

Summary: After a rough mission, you lost a handful of students. Trying to sleep off your concussion, Logan retreats to the kitchen, coping in his own ways. You encounter him late at night, and remember him that there is no need for him to deal with this alone.

“He says he doesn't believe anything much he hears these days He says, "Why fall in love, just so you can watch it go away?".”

The flight back to the mansion was quiet. It had been a difficult mission for the entire group. Only half of the people you’ve left with made it back on the plane. You kept telling yourself that the risks were made clear; it had been a dangerous mission and everyone knew it. Everyone who left agreed on the terms. This was their decision.

Yet, it hurt. You were lucky enough to make it back with just a handful of scratches and bruises. And a light concussion, but that was not what your mind was on at the moment.

As your eyes struggled to stay open, they remained trained on the man in front of you. He was staring at his lap, silent remorse laced within his features. Logan never did share his worries or concerns vocally. He suffered in silence. And where others wouldn’t notice, you did. You were one of the only ones. And each time you tried to comfort him, he would walk away.

“He spends most of his nights wishing it was how it used to be He spends most of his flights getting pulled down by gravity.”

As the plane landed with a light thud, he had stood up almost immediately, already making way to the door, even though the machines had yet to turn off. Though dizzy and tired, you followed him immediately. Logan had been your partner for two years now, and your closest friends several years before that; you were not to leave him alone at this time.

As you stumbled over to him, white spots took over momentarily, but after blinking at the floor twice, they lessened. A hand was placed upon your shoulder, gaining your interest. Looking up slowly, you tried to show him a reassuring smile.

“Don’t do stupid things.” Logan uttered, slowly retreating his hands as you regained your balance.

“Don’t steal my words.” You returned, holding onto Scott’s chair as the engines finally turned off. 

Mere seconds later, the door opened, and Logan gently grabbed your arm. You would have wondered why he hadn’t run off yet, but you shook the thought off as sudden weightlessness took over.

Perhaps he had been right to escort you down the stairs at least.

“I call just checkin' up on him He's up, 3 AM pacin' He says, "It's not just a phase I'm in" My voice comes out beggin'.”

The second your body had hit your mattress, Logan had left again. You figured he would have, but it didn’t lessen the pain. Regardless of that, you had fallen asleep quite quickly, and quite easily. It wasn’t until two hours later that you would wake up.

For a school filled with teenagers, 3 AM was surprisingly quiet. No secret whispers, or rushed footsteps. Complete and utter silence. Yet, you could not bring yourself to fall back asleep.

Your head was still pounding, though less severe than before. Rising from your spot, you stretched your arms, hissing at the sore muscles.

You could really go for some good tea now. 

“All this time I didn't know You were breakin' down I'd fall to pieces on the floor If you weren't around.”

Stumbling down the stairs gently, doing your best not to wake any students, you reached the ground floor. The light in the kitchen was still on, as it often was. Though the children did not barge into the kitchen quite often, the professor was still kind enough to leave something on for them. 

And it was a guiding light for you in the darker hall. At the moment, it was only convenient for you.

As you sneaked into the room, you were relieved to find no one at the tables. You had just woken up from a difficult mission; you were not going to rant about it any time soon. Yet, your silent prayers went unheard as you turned towards the fridge, coming face to face with Logan, who was downing - what appeared to be - his third beer.

A startled yelp escaped you, your hand shooting towards your heart in reflex. The man merely stared at you, an amused smirk spreading across his face.

“That scary, huh?” He remarked.

You simply rolled your eyes at him, lowering your hands whilst you grabbed a bottle from the fridge. 

“Terrifying.” You spoke sarcastically.

“Too young to know it gets better I'll be summer sun for you forever Forever winter if you go.”

As you seated yourself on one of the bar stools, you reached for the small box of medicines, snatching paracetamol from it. Logan sat down next to you, staring at your hands.

“Still in pain?” He offered, breaking the piece into two bits as you handed him the medicine.

“Unless the lights are offending your eyes as well, I figured one more wouldn’t hurt.”

Wordlessly, he nodded, now observing your movements. At first, you considered it to be because of your earlier scare to the group, but even from your focused looks on your glass, you knew something else was plaguing his mind. And you feared you knew exactly what that was. 

Turning your head slightly, you gave him a smile. Hoping to somehow still soothe some of his worries. You knew your attempts would be futile, but you tried nonetheless. The only thing you got in return was a tight-lipped smile. Sighing at the smile, you set down your glass, now turning to face him completely.

“He seems fine most of the time, forcing smiles and neverminds His laugh is a symphony, when the lights go out, it's hard to breathe.”

“There was nothing you could have done, Logan.” You tried to offer in sympathy. The grin from his lips fell, and he was about to speak up. You stopped him before he could, holding up a hand to silently halt him.

“Don’t lie to me, please.”

And just like that, the words died on his lips. Sometimes you could curse yourself for knowing him so well. You ran a hand through your hair, your eyes falling upon your lap, before rising to meet his once more.

“Words will not make up for this loss, I know,” You began. “But they knew what they were running into. We all did. We knew the risks, and we were prepared to die for it. We should respect their wishes instead of pressing the matter further and further.” Your hand came to rest on top of him. A silent gesture of comfort. “We are not built for all that grief.”

“I pull at every thread, tryna solve the puzzles in his head Live my life scared to death he'll decide to leave instead.”

A moment of silence filled the air before Logan decided to speak up: “They were only kids. They weren’t ready.”

Frowning upon the words, you pulled your hand back, swallowing thickly. He was right; they were young. You hated that they decided to sit in that plane before it even took even. You remembered the arguments you had held with several student about the matter. You tried to get a couple to pull out, but your attempts remained futile.

You were blaming yourself before it had even happened. Logan always blamed himself after the blow. You understood his pain.

But no words could correct what happened, or even properly formulate the events. 

Nights like these were the worst.

“I call just checkin' up on him He's up, 5 AM wasted Long gone, not even listening My voice comes out screamin'.”

“The second you got slammed into that wall, I should have pulled them out of there,” Logan went on, referring to the cause of your earlier concussion. “But I stood there. And I stared.”

“Before you ran in and carried me out of there.” You filled in, rubbing your sore shoulder as the images flew past you. “You made a decision right in your eyes, at that exact moment. If you had left me there, you’d be sitting here with just as much remorse.”

A pained silence took over as you doubted your next words. “We don’t get to make it out of these missions without regrets and hauntings.”

His hand reached for his pocket, already pulling out a cigar he had stacked away for later. At the sight, you squint your eyes together, slapping his hand. 

“Will you stop that?”

“I don’t get to smoke?” He grumbled.

“No.” Came your simple answer. “We don’t get to drink and smoke this away.”

“We? No. I do.” He replied, standing up and opening a window on the other side of the room.

“All this time I didn't know You were breakin' down I'd fall to pieces on the floor If you weren't around.”

Brief anger flooded through you, and you shot up from your chair. Too swift for your head to process its movements. White dots covered your vision, your hand immediately grasping the corners of the kitchen island. Your knees buckled briefly, but you were able to remain your posture, now focused on the floor, instead of on your boyfriend, who had already rushed towards you.

A hand came into contact with your back. Gently, but firmly. You did not look up, but you knew he was next to you. Tears began to gather in your eyes as you kept staring at the floor.

“This is difficult for me too, okay?” You mumbled out, now nearly scared to look up. “But I will not sit by while you use self destructive coping mechanisms for grief.”

“I know,” Logan uttered, his hand now grasping your waist as he turned you around slowly, letting you adjust to the room and its lights again.

Giving up on fighting, you let your head fall forward, resting against his chest. You were too tired for all of this. If he were to smoke his worries away, so be it. You’d scold him for it later. When you weren’t on the verge of passing out again.

“Too young to know it gets better I'll be summer sun for you forever Forever winter if you go.”

“You okay now?” He asked, his free hand running to the back of your head, slowly pushing your hair back.

“I don’t want to fight over this, Logan.” You sighed. “This is no matter to be fought about. I just…”

Your words trailed off, fatigue settling into your features. You really could do with a couple hours of rest. You shouldn’t have left your bed.

“I just don’t want you to think you are alone in this.” Finally, your head raised, and your eyes met Logan’s. 

“You don’t need to hide in the kitchen at night to deal with this on your own. I am right beside you. Just call.”

His eyes softened at your words, the hint of a sympathetic smile gracing his features. What was he to say now? Simply let all of it slip out? Or just the pieces he knew you’d be able to help with? How were words to solve this ordeal?

“If I was standin' there in your apartment I'd take that bomb in your head and disarm it I'd say I love you even at your darkest And please don't go.”

Your hand gently touched his, lingering on your waist as well. And as simple as that touch, everything began spilling out.

“I don’t know what I’d do without you,” He whispered. Silently, quietly. As if he was scared others would hear him through the halls. 

“The kids, losing them…” He halted briefly, tucking your head under his chin. “It’s a pain you can’t even describe, but the loss of someone you know. Someone you’re close to.”

A deep sigh filled the air, and for a moment, you could swear his grip on your body tightened. Very short, and very light, but you knew it was there.

“When your body hit that wall today, there was a moment I thought I saw the life slip out of you. If there is anything beside our losses today that will haunt me, it is that memory.”

“I didn't know You were breakin' down I'd fall to pieces on the floor If you weren't around.”

The terrifying chill of a silent response flew through the air, and Logan could not even begin to describe how much he hated it. And thus, he parted from you, one hand still entwined with yours, though more loosely now.

“I have been through worse.” You tried to reassure, hoping to somehow lift that burden off his shoulders.

“And that worries me,” The man rejected. “Where will you draw the line?”

Staring into his eyes, it was now your turn to squeeze his hand. “Where you will.”

Whether he should or should not have taken peace with that, he truly could not tell in that exact moment. But it seemed as if your fatigue had slipped into him. He could start an entire debate on those mere words, but neither of you had the energy to follow up to them.

So he spoke the only words that would make sense to the both of you.

“Come to bed?”

“Too young to know it gets better I'll be summer sun for you forever Forever winter if you go.”

The walk back to your room had been longer than you thought the journey to the kitchen had been. Perhaps because the grief now lay heavier on your mind. Or the fact that Logan had just confessed everything in that room and you left him with a “I have been through worse”.

But the walk was not dreadful. 

It was the moment your body slid under the covers again that filled you with anxiety. Logan hadn’t spoken since that whole ordeal in the kitchen. But now, you could not decipher him. It was difficult to tell if he was mad or not.

Through the little cracks between the curtains, moonlight luminated the room. Not enough for you to make out every detail, but enough for you to notice Logan was changing into more comfortable clothes.

Heat rushed to your face, as you turned around. You’ve seen him in a lot less than just pants, but the sight never failed to make you flustered.

“I'll be your summer sun forever At 3 AM pacin' All this time I didn't know At 5 AM wasted.”

Seconds later, the bed dipped beside you, letting you know your boyfriend had finally joined you. You did not dare to utter another word, silently wishing you could fall asleep instantly.

But then his hands found your waist, and before you could say anything about it, he had pulled your figure into his. A long sigh escaped from his mouth, before he planted a short, but firm kiss on the top of your head.

“I still love you, bub.” He mumbled, placing your back against his chest as his legs entangled with yours.

The sheer relief that sentence brought you, could not even be written down. It was that moment of peace and solitude after a test where so much anxiety and doubt went into.

It was all okay.

“I'd be in pieces on the floor. Forever winter if you go. He says he doesn't believe anything much he hears these days.”

“I love you too.” You whispered back, grabbing one of his hands and bringing it up to your lips, placing a chaste kiss to it.

“Talk to me, next time.” You continued, nestling against his chest. 

A low hum vibrated through his chest as he held you closer, his breath now fanning over your neck.

“I promise.”

“I say, "Believe in one thing, I won't go away".”

—

Taglist: @eerie-inn

I changed the request slightly to fit the story more. Still hope you like it!

[staytinyville]

Lee Know

PLEASE REFER TO MASTERLIST TO GET FULL TAROT READING EXPERIENCE

↣ Summary: When your life suddenly takes a turn, and you're faced with large changes, you question if you’re ready for them. Lee Know is there to tell you it’s what you’ve been waiting for.

↣ Characters/Pairing: Lee Minho x gn!Reader

↣ Genre: fluff

↣ AU/Trope info: 9th member!au, idol!au, pre-debut!Lee Know, pre-debut!reader

↣ Word Count: 624

↣ Warnings: None

↣ A/N: We read nth member AUs here. There are a couple throughout the event. It did come out a bit smaller than I was hoping, but having a full story for each card isn’t the point. It’s just something fun to read while getting a tarot reading. 

JUDGMENT

Judgment, Rebirth, Inner Calling, Absolution

This is your moment to prepare yourself for something bigger. You have been reborn like a phoenix and are now ready to experience your spiritual awakening. You are meant to embrace the new you and forget the past.

This is a card that is meant to tell you that you need to make life changing decisions but not with your head rather with your heart. You know things are going to be different from here on out but you need to let yourself feel those moments that will ultimately lead you to a better time.

You’re reaching the point in your life that is meant to take you higher than you are meant to be. It’s a place that the universe has ready for you after you realized that the things you’ve done in the past will only stay in the past. It’s also a card that brings you to share your struggles with other like minded people. Make sure you have those close to you in order to grow and come out of your shell.

XX JUDGMENT

You watched over the replay of the last performance you did with the other boys. You also looked for the replies that came with each video of you. While you got the same amount of hate as the other boys, you didn’t seem to have many fans compared to the others. Your lips pulled together as you began to worry that you wouldn’t make it as far as the others. 

“You okay?” Someone asked you as they came to sit next to you on the couch. 

You gave Minho a smile in acknowledgment, setting your phone back down before turning to the TV screen in the room. Watching the performance pass by your eyes, you sighed to yourself. 

“Should I do this?” You asked Minho.

“What do you mean?” He frowned, looking at you oddly. 

Minho tried just as hard as you, if not harder. But he was someone who already had something under his belt to push him forward. Heck, he was a back-up dancer for BTS. All of the boys had something that made them stand out in a crowd, which made you feel like you were someone who easily blended in. Someone who wouldn’t be noticed in the group. 

“Should I continue with this whole idol thing?” You said. 

“Isn't this what you've always wanted?” Minho quickly spoke up. “You always talk about it.”

You were someone who was passionate about what you wanted. It’s what he found appealing about you. You demanded people to notice your presence in the room with how powerful you were in everything. You might have had trouble doing certain crafts, but you would try your hardest to find the perfect spot within it. 

“It's my dream more than anything.” You told him honestly. “It's what I want to do with myself.”

“Then why are you doubting?” He asked you.

“Because I'm scared of the changes that come with it.” You admitted. “They are inevitable–I know that for a fact, but I worry that they'll be too much for me.”

Here you were, not even a debuted idol yet, and already you're thinking of yourself negatively. Finding out where the problem was has always been the first step to overcoming your insecurities. You knew what it was that was making you doubt yourself, and you wanted to squash them down before you even got the chance to go out as an idol. 

“If you go into this thinking that it will be your downfall.” Minho told you. “This is your dream, and you know every consequence that will come from it. You've done your research, you're not going into this blind.”

“You have all of us going in with you. You're not alone in whatever you struggle with in the future. We are in this together at this point.” He finished. 

You turned to him, tears welling in your eyes as you understood that things were going to go the way they needed to. You had made it this far in your adventure into the idol world. You were going to struggle–you knew that much. It was what came with this kind of career. 

It wasn’t like you weren’t going into the whole thing blind. The changes that were going to come into your life were something you prepared for. You were someone who thought deeper into things than others. All those nights spent trying to reach that perfect performance each time was going to be worth it for you. The moment you debut with the others, everything was going to fall into place for you.

And just like Minho said, you weren’t going to allow yourself to go through it alone. You now had 8 other boys who were willing to share your struggles. 

“Thanks, Minho.”

Tags : @cultofdionysusnet , @sandsofire , @k-vanity