#(didnt you read the bottle i gave you? it makes the person forget how they got knocked out)

[musubiki]

Mochi and Lime can get one revenge kiss. As a treat.

Coco and Oscar like, why you making such a big deal out of this? It’s only a kiss (says the two with marginally more experience and better(ish) understanding of their romantic feelings)

coco and oscar being completely normal human beings watching these two soap opera ass people try to be in love

BUT i just had a thought about the revenge kiss: if lime were to pull the same shit on mochi with the knock-out medicine, after he pulls away from the kiss giving her a smirk and a wink and a "That's payback for last time." while holding up the bottle of medicine, and not realizing that while the secondary effect didnt work on him (magic res), it DOES work on her so when she knocks out and wakes up shes like "Huh? Did I fall asleep? What happened?"

[shotosprincess]

♡ dating the bnha boys — hcs

｡･:*:･-: ✧ :,｡･:*:･ﾟ☆ ｡･:*:･-: ✧ :,｡･:*:･ﾟ☆

➪ shoto todoroki

pls you’ve prolly been terrified of him for a while prior bc of how ?? talented ?? the mf is ??

but mans prolly saved you at some point and there was this lingering stare you two shared before he left you at recovery girls’ office; were you reading too far into things ?

spoiler alert: you weren’t.

anYWAYS-

he’s the kind of boyfriend to tenderly brush your hair for you and attempt to learn how to tie and braid your hair up in cute ,, simple designs !!

he’d always be ready with little things you’re constantly forgetting; extra snacks,, water,, a fully charged portable charger ,, trust me when i say that man is pREPARED- after all ,, he needs to be ready with everything to take care of his little sweetheart ,, does he not ?

ONLY TWO POINTS IN AND IM ALREADY CRYING BC I LOVE HIM SM BYE BYE BYE

at some point he’d find you sitting on the roof by yourself late at night,, only to stay with you and let you fall asleep on his chest as he drapes a blanket over you and heats it up a lil with his quirk

OKAY YOU CANNOT TELL ME THAT THAT MAN WOULDNT HOLD THE DOOR OPEN FOR YOU AT ALL TIMES AND WOULD SOMETIMES EVEN GET LOWKEYHIGHKEY KINDA SAD WHEN YOU DONT LET HIM

prolly bc he just wants to prove to you that he can be useful

pls just let the man know he’s useful and important he never shows it directly but he needs the reassurance—

he’d give you a warm massage w his quirk whenever you’re in pain :”)

HIDES AND PROTECTS YOU FROM MINETA BC HE KNOWS DAMN WELL WHAT THAT LITTLE SHIT FANTASIZES ABOUT

loves heating//cooling things for you ,, like instant noodles or ice packs !!

surprises you w jewelry that have his initials on them !!

GIVES THE BEST CUDDLES I SWEAR

would hold an umbrella for u while you loop your arm into his as the two of you walk home through the light rain :”)

cries into your chest sometimes after youve fallen asleep bc it’s late nights like these when he reflects on just how lucky of a guy he is to have you— it’s hard for him to articulate it directly ,, but when he does fully open up to you ab it ,, you end up crying too .

WOULD 110% MAKE THE TWO OF YOU YOUR OWN PERSONAL LIL ICE RINK AND TEACH YOU HOW TO SKATE // DO FUN FIGURE SKATING DUOS WITH YOU

➪ katsuki bakugou

prolly got with you initially bc of a dare ( and he nEVER passes up a dare ) ,, but eventually those feelings started to become real and honestly ? it kinda scared the shit outta him . he didn’t know why ,, but for some reason he didnt actually want to leave .

OKAY LARA JEAN AND PETER MF KAVINSKY TYPE BEAT ( ˘ ³˘)♥︎ HIT US WITH THE FAKE RELATIONSHIP TO REAL RELATIONSHIP TROPE YESYESYES

teasingly-mean nicknames = his love language . enough said .

AGGRESSIVE !! KISSES !! ALL !! THE DAMN !! TIME !!

makes you wear his hoodie whenever you show even the sLIGHTEST hint at being cold

he just rly wants to see you in his clothes

he’s so clueless on how to do this whole boyfriend thing ,, but he’s definitely trying bc it’s for you :”)

watches and tries so desperately to copy all the cute couples in the movies you guys watch together

“ roses...do you want roses ? “ “ what ? “ “ the guy in the movie gave her roses...do you want roses too ? “

but at the end of the day you just appreciate him for who he is and that’s more than enough for you :”)

PLS DENKI AND KIRI ARE CONSTANTLY SHOCKED AT HOW MUCH HE’S TRYING FOR YOU

will take any and every opportunity to show off his strength and quirk to you <3

now we all know this man gets jealous hella easily ,, and its no different w relationships :”) he’d constantly make it a point to hold you extra close to him in public ,, show you off on social media and call you by a nickname//petname whenever possible just to reiterate to ppl the fact that you’re his and he’s yours

WOULD LET YOU SIT ON HIS LAP AND DO HIS EYELINER AT 2AM PURELY BC YOU GOT BORED

pls i could rly see myself doing that i wont lie

honestly sometimes he forgets himself and his temper gets a little out of hand ,, but the second he sees his feral reflection in your fearful eyes,, he pulls you to his chest and apologizes profusely :”))

➪ denki kaminari

MF PROLLY GOT WITH YOU BC OF A RIGGED GAME OF SPIN THE BOTTLE AT MINA’S PLACE I CANNOT SEE ANYTH HAPPENING OTHERWISE

one tiny kiss turned into two ,, which turned into three ,, and before you knew it ,, the both of you were spilling out the pent up feelings you had for one another all this time—

mina never shuts up ab it ,, she’s so proud of her matchmaking skills

when the power goes out during a storm ,, he holds onto you tight and plays w your hair as he uses his quirk to turn things back on ,,, “ shhh it’s ok,, i’m here “

will do anything and everything to make you smile <3

he has a lil album in his camera roll with all his favourite pictures of you ,, which is practically just all of them tbh ♡´･ᴗ･`♡

HE LOVES SHOWING YOU OFF IN THE MOST WHOLESOME WAY POSSIBLE !!

super energetic n bubbly but at the end of your dates he passes out right away in your arms

you make sure to wrap him up in blankets and give him an overload of kisses after he’s rly asleep though

will work embarrassingly hard to win you stuffed animals at the fair !! it doesn’t always work ,, but it’s cute nontheless <3

some of the staff and children at the fairs get pissed off but oh well ,,, what you do for love

pls he prolly makes you lil bento boxes for lunch every now and then ( ESPECIALLY DURING EXAM WEEK ) w tiny notes and designs taped on them

constantly calls you “ shawty “ lowkey un ironically and dice rolls in ur direction whenever he sees you ,,, you just end up laughing and playfully punching him

I JUST KNOW HE DOES THE F BOY LIP BITE FACE CONSTANTLY

ITS AN ADDICTION FOR HIM I SWEAR

SUPER CLINGY BUT IN THE CUTEST WAY AAAA

LIL STICKY NOTE LOVE LETTERS FROM HIM IN YOUR LOCKER EVERY !! MF !! DAY !!!

you both agreed that at home cozy netflix dates w microwave popcorn and fuzzy blankets >>> movie theatre dates

110% made a playlist for you at some point when he crushed on you from afar and shared it w you after you started dating

he made a collaborative playlist for yall AND multiple playlists of songs that remind him of you afterwards

pls i just kNOW this man’s love language is making playlists

theyre prolly all categorized by mood or smth too w the cutest covers ever pls

➪ ejirou kirishima

you initially met him bc he was hella upset and alone this one time and you were the only one to notice and be there for him bc he ran away from everyone else to hide the “ uNmanLy “ tears :”))

takes you w him on his lil gym visits ,, hypes you up with every little thing u accomplish !!

constantly teasing bakugou with how he’s able to pull you and how lucky he is to have you

bakugou gets hella annoyed most of the time and just blasts him away-

idk bro i just feel like kiri prolly calls you “ adorable “ alot i wont lie-

LOVES HAND HOLDING,, takes any opportunity to hold ur hand and trace lil casual patterns across your knuckles w his thumb

sometimes he’ll even draw lil hearts on your hand

play fighting but sometimes the two of you get too carried away and he actually loses half of the time-

LATE NIGHT GAME NIGHTS WITH HIM AND THE BAKUSQUAD,, he loves being on the team against you so he can get all competitive

OK HEAR ME OUT;;;; DANCE BATTLES W HIM AS YOUR PARTNER AGAINST RANDOM PPL AT PARTIES

mans gets hella insecure ab himself sometimes ,, so he loves doing lil things for you !! opening a can ,, pulling the blanket over you ,, zipping up your jacket <33

STOP WAIT THATS SO CUTE BYE I WANT THAT

lets you dye his hair—THATS HOW MUCH HE TRUSTS YOU BYE

pls yall prolly aggressively play wii sports and just dance against one another on a regular basis;; it’s literally your thing and you cannot tell me otherwise ahjdjfj

pls i just KNOW this man’s an overly passionate wii player

will wrap his arms around your waist and hug u from behind as you make breakfast

WOULD WEAR MATCHING EARRINGS W YOU IF ITS FOR YOU

slow dances in the living room at midnight w you !!

eventually as you spent more time together ,,, you were able to change his idea of “ manliness “ ,, and he was able to realize that manliness is not equivalent to stoicism and that expressing ur feelings is still totally manly and totally valid !! <33

[og-danny-dorito]

[ 𝐋𝐢𝐭𝐭𝐥𝐞 𝐓𝐫𝐚𝐜𝐞𝐬 𝐎𝐟 𝐓𝐡𝐞𝐦𝐬𝐞𝐥𝐯𝐞𝐬 𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐋𝐎𝐕 𝐋𝐞𝐚𝐯𝐞 𝐁𝐞𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐝 ]

v v hard to explain this concept but basically it's what pieces of them they leave behind with you that would make it known that they live with you/come to your house often. the only people not included is the blonde dude bc i didnt really think his character was around long enough to mention and all for one because hes stinky. enjoy!!

𝐃𝐚𝐛𝐢:

- black hair dye stains on your bathroom sink

- the lingering scent of weed and cigarettes in your bedroom

- stolen hoodies on your couch for convenience

- takeout boxes with his name on them that you've most definitely eaten from

- an extra pair of shoes that he could wear for taking a smoke outside since he almost ruined yours last time

- a half finished beer bottle on the kitchen counter that he'll take a sip from and then promptly pour down the sink next time he comes over

𝐒𝐡𝐢𝐠𝐚𝐫𝐚𝐤𝐢:

- his nintendo switch that he keeps "forgetting" to take back to his place (its just an excuse to come back over even though he doesn't need one)

- anti-dandruff shampoo and conditioner on his ledge of the shower

- the scrunchies/bracelets he gave back on the coffee table so he could steal other ones of different colors

- fast food wrappers near the foot of your couch

- scented lotion you told him you liked on him for his skin

- a card for kurogiri's bar so you could come get him if you needed help and couldn't contact him

𝐓𝐰𝐢𝐜𝐞:

- dirty undershirts and sweatpants in your clothes hamper

- the smell of cigarettes and musk on your couch, bed, and blankets

- a razor and some shaving cream on your bathroom sink's ledge for when he needs to shave at your place

- the cologne you bought him on your dresser that he wears when ya'll go out

- a pack of cigarettes on the nightstand for "emergencies"

- some mugs he put in the freezer so ya'll could have something cold to drink the beers he brought out of

- a few extra towels he brought when ya'll first started sort of living together cause he thought it would annoy you if he used up your clean towels

- not really in your house but i thought i should mention it: theres a few photobooth pictures of y'all in his wallet

𝐌𝐚𝐠𝐧𝐞:

- a few dresses/nice blouses in your closet that she put there in case of surprise dates

- a few things of expensive lip balm that she thought you would like

- a written note that says "don't forget to eat today <3" on a container of food she packed for your lunch

- a list of movies on a piece of paper on the counter that the two of you could watch next time you meet up

- some rubber bands under the couch that she lost because she keeps having to tie her hair up

- old mascara in a drawer in the kitchen that she can't use anymore but you never threw away

𝐓𝐨𝐠𝐚:

- stickers. EVERYWHERE. mostly lisa frank and cute ones she got off etzy

- sticky notes on your bedroom wall and fridge with encouraging notes on them so you'll be motivated to get through the day

- scrunchies that she gives you to wear with each outfit so you're never under-accessorized

- smiley faces with little fangs all over your notebook pages along with little doodles of y'all holding hands

- a framed polaroid of y'all's first date

- a cook book with stars next to the recipes she wants to try out with you next

- some cat-themed utensils that she thought were cute

- "how to raise a child" books since she's trying to convince you to adopt a cat with her

𝐒𝐩𝐢𝐧𝐧𝐞𝐫:

- his laptop and headphone set

- some extra blankets on the couch because he likes to be warm at all times (he is technically reptillian so it makes sense)

- a small dent in the bed since he literally doesn't move from there if he doesn't have to

- a few scratch marks on the floor in the kitchen where he fell and accidentally scuffed the ground with his talons

- the armor plates for his gear that he was fixing at your place because you had the very specific tool he needed

- an extra pair of keys to his place on the key rack

- a five dollar bill with a frowny face sticky note because he lost a bet

- so many hoodies. so many. its a problem.

𝐊𝐮𝐫𝐨𝐠𝐢𝐫𝐢:

- a dress shirt in your closet that he left that you've designated as your personal nightshirt for when you miss him

- his "special pillow" he brought from home since yours were hurting his neck

- a bottle of expensive wine above the sink for special occasions

- a few potted plants that he got you in your living room to "spruce up the space"

- some books on your nightstand that he likes to read you to bed to

- a printed list of places to go eat out at (he's old don't @ him)

- expensive matching pajama sets that ya'll rarely ever wear

- a list of people to call on the fridge if anything were to happen to you and he wasn't there

𝐌𝐫. 𝐂𝐨𝐦𝐩𝐫𝐞𝐬𝐬:

- a vase of red and orange roses on your kitchen table that he bought you last time he visited

- a bunch of really expensive jewelry he bought (NOT stole this ain't dabi) in your dresser

- some fairy lights the two of you set up in your little backyard dining area since he said it didn't feel romantic enough

- a magic book he bought for you on a shelf in your room after you kept asking him how his tricks worked

- a handwritten note from him saying "you look stunning, darling <3" on your mirror in his fancy ass handwriting

- a pair of red gloves sitting on the kitchen table that he forgot on his way out this morning

[ 𝐓𝐡𝐚𝐧𝐤 𝐘𝐨𝐮 𝐅𝐨𝐫 𝐑𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐢𝐧𝐠! 𝐑𝐞𝐛𝐥𝐨𝐠𝐬 𝐀𝐫𝐞 𝐆𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐭𝐥𝐲 𝐀𝐩𝐩𝐫𝐞𝐜𝐢𝐚𝐭𝐞𝐝 :) ]

[chemicallady]

Daddy is home

Greg Sanders x Reader

A/N: Thank you everyone for reading this. If you want some fluff with just a little sadness, you're in the right place.

Couple: Greg Sanders/Female!Reader

Category: Mostly fluff with a little piece of angst. Family slice of life for Greggo.

Content Warning: none

Summary:  Reader is use to feel Greg absence.... but what about is own children? And Greg? What's more important? His job or his family?

*****

You are use to feel Greg absence, almost every night and, sometimes, even for days. It wasn't a big deal when you two started to see each other. You were a grad student, looking for a PhD out of town - searching for a new experience- and he was a lab tech at the crime lab in Vegas. Your relationship had worked for 5 years while you were in Salt Lake City, even if you constantly missed him so much and viceversa. He spent a lot of utahns weekends at your apartment and you came back in Nevada for every break.

After your PhD graduation you came back to Vegas and he proposed to you. It was an hard time, Warrick was dead, he had printed is first book on Vegas history and you just settled down at UNLV. You had lived togheter two months and then he proposed. Of course you said yes and the two of you had a small cerimony at the Eclipse, Catherine's casinó. It was an intimate cerimony, with your friends and co workes and relatives from Norway and (your hometown/country.)

You had worked hard on your post doc as a teaching assistant and a researcher and he has continued his job as a csi. You have always prefered working at night the days you didnt have any class, in order to be awake when he came back home in the morning.

It worked since you discovered that you were pregnant. Both of you were so excited to become parents, it has always been something that you desire, having your own kids. Start a family.

After Bjorn birth, by the way, everything changed. You have started to work in the morning and sleeping at night in order to provide the best standard of living for your son. And, after two years and half, Jodie came to the world, complicating thing but coloring your life even more.

You constantly miss Greg, of course. You miss your youth with him, the mornings spent in making love with jazz music in the background before a lazy afternoons sleeping in his arms. The days he came to the University after job to pick you up.

But both of you love your family.

It's stil working.

Because you love him and Greg loves you more than anything.

More than that, he is born to be a dad. He was scared as hell, but he perfect fits that role.

Even more, he is methodical.

He is really good in keeping job separating from his personal life, even if his coworkers are his family. And yours as well.

☆

...But is hard for kids to understand why dad is never home. Especially for Bjorn, who is the eldest. He has started to notice this situation in the last weeks and you have been scared of this moment since you gave birth to him.

《 Why daddy can't come today?》

You look at your baby boy, feeling really sorry for the whole situation. It is his first baseball match with the pre school team as a player in the field from the first minute and it means a lot to him.

Bjorn's really smart for his age, he understand that his parents jobs are important because is a duty... But is natural that he feels so betrayed. He is still too young to even imagine how demanding is Greg's job.

《Because daddy has a case》, you try to explain with a soft voce, caressing his blonde hair with two fingers. He seems totaly like his father in this moment. 《He has to catch this big bad guy and-》

《Why uncle Nick is not catching him for daddy? Just for today! 》

《Because they work togheter, sweetheart... you know that. We already talk about daddy's job...》

Not in a specific way, of course. Greg is more like a super hero to Bjorn.... he is too innocent and young to know how cruel and horrible could be the world sometimes.

《It's not fair. He never came to see me play》

《That's not fair... you know that daddy is so sad for this... he ask me to shot everything so he can see it as long as he will be home!》

That doesn't help.

《And I'll be already in bed》 he snuffles, before running in his room, nearly cry.

You don't know how to manage this. Both of Greg and you are really indipendent.... that's why your wedding is so strong, because you don't need the other around one all the time.

But for Bjorn is different. He needs his daddy as he needs you. Most of that, he wants to make Greg proud of him, shows him how he has improved thanks also to their weekend practices on Sundays.

You are still thinking about a solution, but Jo start to cry from her playbox.

You have to speak with your husband and decide what tell to Bjorn, togheter.

He deserves a good explanation.

☆

It's late when Greg comes home.

He is surprised when he notice that the kitchen lights are still turned on. You are sitting at the table, looking at your laptop as you can't really see it.

《 y/n, baby?》, he calls you, waking you up from your thoughts. 《Are you ok? It's like 3 in the morning, sweetie.》

《Yeah, I was looking over some notes from next week semenary when I realised how late it was, I decided to wait for you to come back.》

《Thanks, after a couple of double shifts, I really need to speak with my wife》, he says with a smile, before kisses your lips and take a sits next to you. 《I've missed home in those last two days.》

《Have you slept a little?》, you ask worried. When a case is so demanding, the team works till they are exhausted. 《Did you have a propel meal?》

《...I ate two sandwiches Dr Robbins' wife made for us.》

《....there is some roast left. I'm gonna warm it for you and then I'll put you in the bed at least for nine hours, bright man》

He laughts a little. 《Yes ma'am.》

You stand up, caressing his hair, after place a kiss on his head. 《Tell me about the cause. Was that bad?》

《More like a nightmare....》

He starts talking about the brutal abductions he was working on those last days. In the meanwhile you are cooking for him. You open a good bottle of wine your father sent to you last week and prepare a couple of fine glasses. Is not a problem for you when Greg talks about his job. For some unknown reasons, it grows on you during the years togheter. You also have helped the team sometimes with you competences. It's quite normal for the two of you speaking about your day. It helps to split away the stress and find always your connection. And is always reliving for you see that even if the job is so demanding physically and emotionally, Greg can totaly handle it. Not only. He loves is job. Even in dark days like this one.

《Poor girls....》, is the only thing you can say, while you're watching your husband eat like he was starving. 《No one deserve this kind of fate...》

《Think at the parents 》, he observes, moving his elbows quickly. 《If someone would have done something like that on Jodie, I'd went mad.》

You stop thinking about the case immediately.

《Sorry for the unhappy connection.... but if you are not too tired, we need to speak about our boy.》

Greg looks at you surprised. 《What about him? Bad day?》

《Yes》, you answer, surprising him even more. Bjorn is really talented in sports, unlike his father. 《He played 10 minutes than he had an argument with the coach and spent the rest of the afternoon warming the bench.》

This is unusual. Bjorn is a good lad. Always smiley and obedient at preschool. Teachers love him because he is so good and he knows a lot about science and stuff even if he is four. Mom is an academic, a college professor and daddy is a scientist. How could be different? He is also responsible and he always take serious the baseball trainings. That's the first time he disobey this much.

《What happened y/n? Oh, no. Let me guess.》 You look him cover his own face with a hand. 《He is mad at me, isn't he?》

《Yep babe, he is really mad at you. And at me as well. By now, I think he is mad at the world because you didn't come today.... I explained him that's not your fault, but...》

Greg sighs 《But it is my fault. When he born I swore to God that I'd be a good father even if my job is.... the 70% of my life.》

《But you are》, you say with a stubborn tone in your voice. 《You are a good father. It was just and unfortunate Saturday. He have never missed a game before. You'd be there if it wasn't for the case. 》

《I know but he deserves more than all those 'if' statements. 》 You look at him, feeling the heaviness of this thoughts. 《I should stay in the lab.》 He finally says and you realise a long sigh. This is not going to be an happy conversation, not with your regretting husband weak moment. 《The moment I met you, I knew you were the one. I wanted to start a family before changing job, work on field. It was a stupid decision. If I continued to work as DNA tech we would have more money and more time to spend all togheter.》

《.... I throught we were out with 'if' statements.》

《Y/n, honey-》

《Don't you dare 'honey' me, Greg Sanders.》 You stop him. You keep his hand in yours and smile. 《You are an amazing father. One day, when he will be older and wiser, he will understand. Now is easy to handle the situation. If you spend a day with him, he'll forget about it. Is just a kid, G.》

Greg seems not satisfied. He feels like an idiot, not thing about how mad is son would be noticed his absence. But he also trust your judgement. He always says that you are an amazing mom and even more, the best of wives.

So he smiles back.

《Maybe you are right.》

《Maybe?》, you ask with an ironical tone. He stand up and comes near to you. He offers his hand and you keep it, staning on your feet.

《Sorry Dr Sanders》, he replies, while you are wrapping your arm on his neck. 《You're completely right y/n. I'm already planning an afternoon, just for boys.》

《He'll love it》, you reassure him, before asking for another kiss, with more passion. You both find a good arrangement so you can clean the kitchen and try to sleep at least three hours.

.....or maybe do something more interesting with you husband, who seems to have plans, looking the way he is lifting the t-shirt of your pijama....

You are use to feel Greg absence, that's true.

But when he comes back, well.... that's the moment you realise how much you actually have missed him. And how much you love him and be loved in return.

○Fin○

[lnarizakis]

a two-player game (2 lives left!) | k. kenma

masterlist

2 lives left! | a two-player game: kozume kenma x f! reader 

STATISTICS

PLAYER ONE: KOZUME KENMA.

SHOCK: — — — — — 5/5

OBLIVIOUSNESS: — — — 3/5

ADVICE-GIVING: — — — — 4/5

FRIENDLINESS: — — — 3/5

IN LOVE: — — — — — 5/5

PLAYER TWO: (L/N) (Y/N).

SHOCK: — 1/5

OBLIVIOUSNESS: — — — — 4/5

ADVICE-GIVING: — — — 3/5

FRIENDLINESS: — — — — — 5/5

IN LOVE: — — — — — 5/5

(U/N): hello? u still there?

(U/N): hellooooo

(U/N): afk much? haha

(U/N): u didnt finish what u were sYing\

Kenma stared at his screen, wondering what he should say. His mind wandered, thinking about the fact that (Y/N) was somewhere out there, in the comforts of her own home, sitting and playing the same game he was playing. He thought about how she was probably sitting cross-legged, or slouched, or her back completely straight as she probably wore headphones over her ears, or earbuds tucked in the confines of her ears, or blasted the game soundtrack through the speakers of her computer. Kenma sighed, as he slouched back in his chair. A blush crept over his face. He was talking to his crush over a video game. It was practically like texting her. Kenma began to type once more.

applepi: yea im still here

applepi: so abt my crush

No, no, no! What was he doing? He couldn’t possibly tell his crush about his crush! Why? Why would he do that?! He immediately typed in a “never mind.” Despite some protests from the other person, the two pretended to forget that ever happened.

—

All throughout the weekend, Kenma sulked and sulked. There was no particular reason, but he just felt so uncomfortable knowing that he told his crush that he had a crush on someone. There was also the factor that (Y/N) didn’t seem quite interested in what he had to say about his predicament, unlike past times where he could talk about anything he wanted and she would gladly contribute all she had to offer to help the poor boy out.

And so the terrible weekend had ended. It was a nice break for Kenma, being away from everything and everyone; he immersed himself in the virtual world as he let go of all of his worries. But now he had to face reality once more - he had to face (Y/N), the terrible final boss. He had so many more enemies he had to defeat (his teammates, according to Kenma), but the powerful weapon of ignoring them always beat them in the end.

He wanted to stay in his bad mood for the entire school day. It was his plan, and it was a really good plan, but (Y/N) just had to ruin it.

Kenma sat at his desk in his classroom that morning they returned from the weekend. He stared at the nothingness that lay before him on his desk until he heard the sweet sound of (Y/N)’s voice when she came through the door to the classroom. He heard her laugh as she greeted those around her a good morning. He relished in the music as she walked towards her desk.

“Good morning, Kenma-kun!” (Y/N) chirped, as she sat down. Kenma jumped at the sudden words, and he felt warmth everywhere, especially in his cheeks. He smiled at the sound of her greeting, and said one back. God, no one could make him feel the way she makes him feel when he’s around her. He took a deep breath, knowing that his unrequited love consumed his whole heart. Ah, if he were only as smooth as Kuroo was and knew his way with words.

10 DAMAGE TAKEN!

Kenma frowned; from a mile away, one could tell he was clearly in a bad mood. He hung his head down low, as he was reminded of (Y/N)’s date last weekend.

“Kenma-kun, are you okay? Is there something wrong?” (Y/N) asked, her voice laced with concern. Her eyes studied his face, discontentment written all over it. She wondered what she should do; if only she could consult applepi in this situation. The setter faced (Y/N) and he smiled.

“Ah, it’s nothing, (Y/N)-san, please don’t worry,” he murmured, hoping that she would get the feeling that he would like to be left alone.

10 DAMAGE TAKEN!

And so for the rest of the time they sat next to each other during class, (Y/N) thought about everything that applepi had advised her to do with every problem that she had:

(U/N): help!!! i cant decide between buying a sword or a dagger from this shopkeeper

applepi: hm get a sword bc u will get more gold out of the enemy

—

(U/N): theres this one friend i have & i feel like she rlly hates me??/?

applepi: are you only focusing on the small details?

applepi: look at the big picture & notice her behavior around u,

applepi: is it different from when shes around other ppl?

—

(U/N): do u think its weird that talking to u feels like an escape from reality?

applepi: no i feel the same.

applepi: i think that talking to someone u barely know is a good way to let loose bc they dont know who u r

—

(U/N): how do you get rid of the feeling of missing someone?

applepi: i talk to them thru text as if they were sitting right next to me

applepi: like how im talking to u right now

...

(Y/N) looked down at her notes to see that she had written nothing compared to all the complicated words written on the blackboard. She had been staring at the blackboard daydreaming about how she had fallen in love with her internet best friend. (Y/N) thought it was silly, really; it was stupid how she had fallen in love over text on a screen. But those words, all of those words that some guy out there named “applepi” had accompanied her throughout her best and her worst times. She could stay up all night to see them up as well, fighting away enemies to clear the level. From in-game items to wise words of advice, (Y/N) owed so much to this person.

And Kenma had no idea that his crush liked him back.

+1 OBLIVIOUSNESS!

—

(Y/N) was a very friendly person; everybody in the volleyball club could see that. It seemed to Kenma, of course, that (Y/N) was the friendliest with Kuroo Tetsuro, the captain. All throughout practice they would constantly make jokes with each other, teasing and pushing each other around. It hurt Kenma; it really did. But (Y/N) did not know that.

In fact, after that dreaded date over the weekend, (Y/N) and Kuroo promised to each other that they would not go out on a second date. They realized that they were better off as friends, for Kuroo could sense in (Y/N)’s eyes and her words that she had the ability to break Kenma out of his shell, even further than Hinata had done. She also told off Kuroo, telling him that she couldn’t date someone who had such weird bed-head hair, much to his disdain. He couldn’t get rid of it! And besides… she already had someone in her heart.

But the point of the matter is: Kenma was taking this completely the wrong way. He watched with jealous eyes as Kuroo and (Y/N) shared playful banter. Her beautiful laugh rang in Kenma’s ears for all the wrong reasons.

10 DAMAGE TAKEN!

As they practiced serving, Kuroo used this as an opportunity to try out his jump serves. He was consistent, but the one time he hit it into the net, (Y/N), who was watching for stray balls, called out to him, teased him to no end. The other teammates laughed on, especially Haiba Lev, whose serves were just as bad. Kenma mentally cursed at Kuroo, for stealing away (Y/N). He could never possibly curse at him for real; everyone would be in shock at his sudden outburst and ask him what was wrong. (Y/N) would ask him what was wrong. And if that happened… he would freeze up and definitely lose another life.

10 DAMAGE TAKEN!

When they began practicing receiving, Taketora called out to Yaku to try out Karasuno’s libero’s “Rolling Thunder,” or whatever it was called, to which Kuroo made a sarcastic remark that Yaku could never pull off something as flashy as that. (Y/N) laughed, despite not knowing what the “Rolling Thunder” move was. Once again, Kenma mentally told off Kuroo to stop saying funny things that (Y/N) could laugh at. His jokes were the ones that made (Y/N) laugh; he knows this because she laughed at all the jokes he made over their chat in their video game.

10 DAMAGE TAKEN!

During their water break, Kuroo and (Y/N) played a little chasing game as she playfully refused to hand him his water bottle. She tossed his bottle to Taketora, who then threw it to Fukunaga, handing it over to Yaku. Kuroo chased the libero around, who passed it on to Inuoka. He gave a hearty laugh as he tossed it to Lev. Silly, clumsy Lev called out to Kenma as the tall boy threw it to Kenma, who with his slow reaction did not catch it in time. The lid of the bottle flew open, and water poured out everywhere. Everyone else watched in shock, but the initial shock passed by them as they all began laughing.

Kenma thought they were all laughing at him.

10 DAMAGE TAKEN!

The same ordeals continued even after the water break, and after a millennia later, the practice ended. Kenma, along with everyone else, helped clean up after practice. They also cleaned up the little water spill, which (Y/N) thanked Kenma for helping clean up.

Kenma changed his clothes in the club room. He was the only one inside, as Kuroo and (Y/N) were outside waiting for him. He could hear their laughter through the doors. Then they suddenly went silent. Kenma groaned, knowing that they were probably making out or something, as he buttoned his uniform back up.

10 DAMAGE TAKEN!

He opened the door, and to his surprise, Kuroo and (Y/N) were actually not exploring each others’ mouths with their tongues. Instead, he opened the door to see a smirking Kuroo and a very, very flustered (Y/N). She gasped slightly when she caught sight of Kenma and she turned her flustered face away from his prying eyes. Poor Kenma thought that he had accidentally caught them making out and they pulled away right as he opened the door.

10 DAMAGE TAKEN!

And so he walked away, leaving them in the dust.

10 DAMAGE TAKEN!

He thought he heard her call out, “Kenma-kun, wait!”

10 DAMAGE TAKEN!

1 LIFE LEFT! FINAL LIFE!

—

hello! thank you for reading! next part is the last part, so please comment if you want me to tag you on the last part! whatchu guys think so far? lemme know! i also take requests too........... B)

taglist (comment/ask to be added!): @i-bitch-you-bitch @cadememe @animefan7420 (wont let me tag u :( !!!!) @issalilmessy

[macklives]

hey so this is gonna be a long-ish one. ive decided its been far too long since i did a session, and we did so many i can often forget what happened. i started in july and im pretty sure its been more than half a year now since this whole blog happened. and in that time, we’ve gone through 88 sessions and i want to know if i remember the relevant plot points and what we got up to in the last few sessions. a refresh/reminder if you would.

so i hereby commence my own little recap of act 5 because yeah no, its too much to do a recap of everything and i have andrew for that after every few acts. but i wanna refresh my mind on act 5 for now. so here we go.

1. alternia.. fucked up place. but its a place the trolls live on so what are we gonna do about it? overthrow the government? seems about right, lets do that with the next troll that gets introduced and if its not kanaya idk what andrew is doing by not having introduced the best troll yet. why the long wait? it was the second introduced? i honestly expected it to go in order when i first read act 5, because first we had karkat talk to jade which was the first new piece dialogue in the comic besides the main kids, but then we had kanaya with rose, which was followed by tavros, then terezi (iirc). so id assume we were following that order but nope karkat got fully introduced, then this random fucking juggalo called gamzee made its way into the comic. imagine my surprise.

2. theres been terminology throughout act 5, that i do not fucking know and will not remember and probably never will. like tf is a perigee again? i made a doc somewhere ill probably find it.

3. karkat’s introduction... short but very sweet. and by sweet i mean we got to know the depths of the angry edge lord. and by depths i mean karkat got angry at gamzee for typing in a way that he didnt like so he yapped like a chihuahua. nah, but seriously, i do like karkat tho, hes growing on me but only bc hes a bitch baby and his whole personality makes me want to mock him so thats the reason im not that annoyed and think hes funny, and the most harmless troll. even more so than tavros. and thats saying something. 7.5/10 bc im generous.

4. then gamzee... the high juggalo troll who has the worst typing quirk imo, i cannot for the life of me read it. but hes chill, i actually really like gamzee. hes funny and the least problematic as of right now. 8.5/10.

5. terezi’s introduction next i think. she likes playing as a lawyer with her stuffed dragons, ie by roleplay, shes blind, can see through licking, and she likes eating chalk, maybe its even nutritious. shes good. 9/10. 

6. uhh in the process of these intros, there are teams being made? karkat joins gamzee and terezi in, i THINK, the red team?? bc terezi likes red?? could be wrong, i dont remember the teams except that its red/blue to represent sollux’s duality in those colors. terezi then tries recruiting AC but AC is like lol sorry i have to ask this friend of mine who has authority over me for some goddamn reason and terezi goes yuck tf i hate that guy................... yeah thats all we have on the teams. pretty sure sollux had smth to do with karkat about the making of the leaders, and they did the “i hate me” and the “no i hate me more than u hate u” or whatever the fuck that was. they got embarrassed afterwards and deleted their messages. im pretty sure they have no messages because everything ends up being mutually deleted so their logs are actually empty. ngl, kinda enjoyed their convos, made me appreciate their characters. i hope we get more because its good content. i also dont know what order this whole thing is in, who contacted who first? couldnt tell you. ill remember later on. and since im basing this off from memory alone, gotta deal with what i remember. uhhhh so yeah. we havent met all characters yet so the teams have not been officially decided but we got the bases, which is that.

7. god i found it, and the only thing im looking at right now is the terminology list i made and what the fuck?? what the fuck?? you miss a few weeks and suddenly the word nubslurping comes up and you forget what the fuck youre reading.

8. im PRETTY SURE aradia is seen after that whole team fiasco?? or its sollux... maybe. wait. its sollux, right. i just knew someone gets introduced mid way through is all. actually, someone gets introduced after every 20 pages. i have no idea. but ik aradia and sollux go hand in hand.

9. oh shit. OH SHIT! RIGHT! I REMEMBER! so this occurs in the latest session i did, and not the beginning of act 5, but AG and aradia team up, right?? and sollux fucking gets manipulated by them and ??? idk??? they make him find the game, reprogram it and then make him believe its going to end the world (which in hindsight is true, but anyways) so he refuses to play it which was AG’s plan all along so she steps up and becomes leader in his place. but aradia says sollux will still play the game no matter what, but she never went through with the plan for AG but it was apart of a prophecy? that sollux wouldnt be the leader at all? that he’d still play? but it had to go according to plan so it could succeed??? we just dont know why yet. anyways, point being, she still cares for sollux since she did it for him rather than for AG. and thats what i recall. god tf i forgot about that whole drama until writing down “sollux and aradia go hand in hand” which gave me violent flashbacks to the memory.

10. oh and id give aradia 9/10 and sollux 7/10. i do like sollux but if i put him higher than karkat, id get crucified. so im keeping them around the same.

11. man i really like sollux and aradia tho, i may have put him at 7, but i really like their dynamic and i really hope they make up and aradia explains herself about AG. because from one side it looks shitty. and while sollux is rude and never makes up his mind, he apologized to aradia after going off, and that was the only time ive seen him be sincere, so im pretty sure he cares for her to some extent. and i think its somewhat mutual? considering the whole “did it for him” thing. man, i see potential because i actually like both their characters. theyre well written. may not have the best personalities, but i appreciate well written characters and homestuck has the best ones ive seen in a while.

12. oh shit, hell yeah, the more i write, the more im connecting the dots and remembering. however, the more i write, the more i want to just make an analogy post but thats not for now. jesus christ its not all about analogies, mack, this is a recap. but.. how does andrew do it? to not go off track??? hard. telling ya.

13. anyways, didnt we break the fourth wall at some point and have the demon gods or whatever the fuck speak to us in third person for the first time in the comic, after having only gone into second person narrative, right after we were introduced to sollux and his “virus”? the uh, the phrase “the demon was already here” was said, or something along those lines. first line in homestuck to give me the creeps ngl and i appreciate it bc it gives me motivation to know what the fuck its about. its cool bc you have no idea where its going and it sure doesnt have anything to do with the current plot, since the trolls’ session/game doesnt have fucking demons so im curious as to what the fuck that was about. and if i really have to make a theory, i feel it has something to do with aradia’s voices in her head which also connect to the gods rose heard when she started disregarding rules and told dave to look at derse without listening to music bc it was as if he was purposely blocking away their calls. like holy shit, that gave me the shivers. while i do want to know more about wtf happens after act 4, trolls are taking priority right now. just like we did with the intermission. no discussing the kids unless necessary. treat this as its own separate comic. and THEN we can connect.

14. ANYWAYS, tavros’ intro???? that comes afterwards?? with the fiduspawn that made me gag a little on the inside? yep. remember that. fuck that lol. -1/10 but tavros himself is MAYBE a 6/10? i wish we explored his character more in his intro bc right now he just looks like a character made only to be a victim rather than have any depth and i feel thats robbing someone of their full potential. give me more personality andrew, rather than a quivering boy who falls prey to bitches. im expecting more throughout the comic honestly and i hope he gets growth so hes not looked as a “victim” but rather his own character. he is still sweet, and i like him because i want to protect him, but id rather have more info, you know what i mean?

15. oh hell. kanaya had a chainsaw at some point. that made me happy. and didnt she cut off tavros’ legs?? and he got robot ones? and some creepy dude was looking and we called him saggy tits bc hes sagittarius? right? neat. that did happen. pretty sure saggy tits is ACs friend that tells her what to do. the more u know. OH and they all have colored blood similar to their text colors lol. that i remember... so tavros has brown, terezi has blueish green, um. karkat has grey the loser. and apparently it forms a rainbow which is nice. rainbow is good.

16. i dont remember anything else actually

17. wait no i do. AG appeared. shes a petty bully. idk what to say about her. we didnt get that much, except that she hates tavros but is okay with aradia. she also looks like a bottle opener. actually, i think she teamed with aradia to gain leadership rather than to “be friends”. and while that is similar to how karkat did it, meaning the gain, the motivation and how they earned it is entirely different. kinda seeing a trend tho. the leaders of the red/blue teams are both characters who wanted the role, but never had it to begin with. only to win their way into the position. but rather than ask non-stop like karkat did, AG manipulated others so she could be successful. not too sure if she also used aradia for that, or is actually motivated to become friends since they were “past enemies” and she needed a rebound. pretty sure its somewhat both. while AG did mostly use aradia to speak with sollux, what she doesnt know is that aradia is a bad bitch who never even thought about AG and only followed through with the plan bc she had a plan of her own. i guess we’ll look into that later. i lowkey want to know their history.

18. OH AC!!! she appeared for a second as well. love her. shes amazing. 9.5/10. and you may ask yourself, why am i saying “i love this character” but none of them are 10/10?? weellllll its because, and i cant stress this enough, 10/10 belongs to kanaya, i dont make the rules. im waiting for her introduction, shes my favorite and its obvious. sorry.

19. oh huh seems i forgot about the term “lusus”. which.. is.. their parents but not really, its these fucking weird ass creatures that the trolls fought in a cave or something as a child. i dont fucking know. terezi hatched hers and it died? gamzee’s also died but his goat sea dad was never really there to begin with so while it is sad, its more sad that gamzee never saw him? um.. karkat killed his own by exploding his computer bc sollux said dont run the virus and karkat said u cant tell me what to do and did it anyways. so thats on him. but apparently theyre supposed to die, to become prototyped during the game, right? yeah. i remember now.

20. thats.. about it? idk anything else, nothing is coming back to me apart from the shit above. huh.... im surprised how quickly things do come back to you the moment you rant about the plot tho.... handy trick.

cool. neat. fun. this took me too long. but im glad i remember a little bit.

[ellana-ravenwood]

Salt, Tequila, Lemon - Jason Todd x Reader

Please read this intro, thank you very much :  

So. I posted this yesterday, but after a bug on the Tumblr app on my phone it got deleted. I’m super bummed out because it had over 200 notes and quite a few feedbacks that I never got to read because it was accidentally deleted...If the people that took the time to comment things on the story could take a bit more time to write a little comment again and give me their feedbacks, and also if the people that liked and reblog could do it once more...i’d appreciate the hell out of you <3.  So reposting it (thanks god I always have back ups of all my stories now). Written in twenty minutes during my break at work. Bam. Hope you’ll like it :

Also, since Tumblr’s new guidelines and enforcement of it, I DON’T really appear in searches anymore, so the only way for this story to be seen by others than those who follow me is to reblog it. So if you wanna, you can show your support for my writing by doing just that. Thanks very much. You can find my masterlist here : @ella-ravenwood-archives

_________________________________________________

Ok. So. Grandma’s remedy against heartbreak ? Oh, right. 

Salt. Tequila. Lemon. 

Got it. Licking the back of your hand to make the salt stick to it, you pour yourself a massive shot of “To-Kill-Ya” in your coffee mug, not even caring about the fact that there is still some remnant of your cappuccino from last night in it. 

You focus on the sound the liquid makes as it fills your cup. Makes you think about something else. Good. Yup. This was totally gonna help right now. 

“Cheers”, you exclaim to yourself, your empty apartment echoing your voice. 

Salt. 

Wincing. Stingy. Salt on its own is gross. 

Tequila. 

More wincing. Oh my god, it burns. The coffee that was still at the bottom of the cup is an oddly nice touch. 

Lemon. 

The last of the Wincing. 

You spit the piece of lemon you just bit into in the trash and…miss. The yellow fruit falls with a little flat sound on the floor, and you honestly can’t bother to pick it up. Your apartment is a mess anyway, so you just stare at it angrily and pour yourself another drink. 

Salt. Tequila. Lemon. 

You gulp the last of the citrus and shiver. Miss the trash again. 

Damn. This was good. 

Well, actually, it was disgusting. 

You didn’t like strong alcohol and what the Hell ?! Why did you leave a bit of coffee in your cup ? Now that the aftertaste was kicking in, it was actually really gross. If the tequila itself didn’t make you wanna throw up, the stale coffee taste nearly did. Oh, and the salt and lemon combination was as awful as ever. 

You really didn’t like salt, tequila, or lemon. 

But it was still good. 

Because thanks to all this immediate awfulness, you could slowly feel yourself drift into “haze land”, and forget about your worries. 

Forget that your boyfriend of two years just cheated on you with some random woman you worked with. Woman that, by the way, he met at the Christmas “end of the year” party from you work you invited him to…You gave him free champagne and mise-en-bouche and all your love, and he broke your heart. 

It wasn’t your thing, to drink your sorrow away. And it wasn’t your thing either to wallow because of a man…But you genuinely thought he was “the one” (oh what a mistake you would soon realize that was). 

He was always so nice, treating you like a princess. He complimented you daily, and never forgot an important date. He was affectionate, not to an annoying point. He was the perfectamount of affectionate. He was a gentleman and seemed to love you and yet, he betrayed you. 

If a man like him, that was nothing short but sweet and passionate with you, cheated on you, then did that mean you couldn’t trust anyone ? 

Because in your eyes right now, he was perfect. Albeit said eyes were slightly clouded by a a few tequila shots. 

You were downing a fourth drink starting to slowly sob when…

There’s very few things that can get you out of a drunk state in seconds. 

An extremely cold shower could do the trick, for instance. Brings you back to your senses a bit you know ? You wouldn’t magically be sober, but you’d get a clearer mind. Or someone giving you shocking news ! Or like, an event so incredible that your body just forgets how drunk it is for a minute. 

And this event, for you, came at the perfect time. 

Right when you were entering your “sad drunk” phase, which was between the “lol alcohol does NOTHING to me” phase where you downed most of your drinks, and the “dancing on the bar’s counter” phase (a few more drinks and you would have a one woman dance party in your living room, acting as if you were on a bar’s counter and that your name was suddenly “Britney”).

Right when you were about to wallow times a thousand, and cry, and yell “whyyyyyyy ?!” to the sky, arms in the air (drama queen). 

Years later, looking back on that particular event, you’ll start to realize that Destiny HAS to exist. Because come on, it was just too perfect a timing to be a simple coincidence. 

You were about to swallow up your fifth drink, launching yourself head first into the “sad phase” when an ear shattering noise rang all around your apartment. 

Broken glass. 

It was the sound of broken glass. Heightened to the max by your drunkness. You turned on your stool, and…there he was. 

It was a guy. That you were sure of because he had no boobs and too much pecs. And that guy…well that guy just flew right through your window, destroying it. How rude. 

There was glass everywhere. 

How much did a window cost ? Probably a fortune. 

You wondered briefly if you could just use aluminium foil and tape the shit up. There was nothing of value to steal in your apartment anyway, and if aluminium foil could keep meals warm, it definitely worked with a house too right ? 

You sobered up quite a bit, but you were also very drunk when this event happened, so your mind was still in that cloudy weird phase where your priorities were…interesting. 

You worried more about the broken window at first, than about that guy who just launched through it. 

A guy. 

Not just any guy. 

You saw that guy before. 

He was one of those night vigilante your crazy hometown was filled with…RED HOOD !! 

“Thick thighs”, is the first thing you thought right after you recognized him (priorities). 

The second thing you thought was that you needed another drink, and so you downed what was your fifth one, but with that crazy thing happening ended up being on the same level as if it was a second one. You were tipsy, but not “drunk” anymore. 

The third thing that came to your mind was…Is he still alive ? 

No cause, he was like, just laying there, on your living room’s floor, not moving. 

“…Outch.” 

Oh. He spoke. 

So he ain’t dead. Good, means you can have another drink then, you don’t need a clear mind to call an ambulance or something. 

Oddly enough, in your half-drunk half-sober state, this sounded completely reasonable. Nevermind if Red Hood had some internal bleeding or something. He talked. He was probably fine. 

A minute passed, and you just sat there, sipping up your tequila in between taking a pinch of salt and biting into a piece of lemon. 

Salt, tequila, lemon. Great remedy against heartbreaks. 

Wait, were you heartbroken ? Really ? You couldn’t really recall that fact now. But, yeah…it was the reason why you were drinking right ? Because right now, all you could think about was the fact that this Red hood guy had abs for days…

This unforeseen event sobered you up quite a bit, but the two shots you just took kinda brought you back to the same state than you were before.

Well. Not quite. You were drunk as hell again, but seemed to have avoided the “sad phase”. Instead, Red Hood bursting quite literally through your window took you to another road. 

The : “Cool, I got a drinking buddy phase”. Well, taking for granted he didn’t have any internal bleeding and wouldn’t die while biting into a lemon wedge. 

“Tough day ?” 

You ask him, as he slowly sits up and shakes his head, trying to regain his senses. He looks towards you and seem surprised (or at least you think he is, because he wears a mask so…kinda hard to tell). 

************

Jason definitely thought he was alone in this place, because no sane person would just sit there, not saying anything, as someone simply jumped through their window. Nope, most people would just freak out. Scream. 

He knows, because it’s not the first time he falls through a window during a night on duty. And every single time it happened, people freaked out. Screamed. Threw stuffs at him, or hid away begging for their life to be spared. 

And yet here you were, half a bottle of tequila in front of you, surrounded by lemon wedges you bit into, and table salt all over your hand, just staring at him curiously. And did you just say : “tough day” ?  

Well, Jason guessed the empty half of the bottle was why you were so chilled about it all. He sat up, and slowly got back to his feet. 

Usually, going through a window meant the end of the night for him. He’d go back to one of his secret stash, patch himself up and get some rest. Most of the time, he fell through windows because someone pushed him or threw him there…Though today, he just embarrassingly missed a step and fell by himself. 

Of course, no one would ever now he tripped while jumping from one building to another (you lived on the last floor) and went careening into your home (and life). Nope, the official story would be that he fought a fierce enemy and was thrown into that window. Finding fake villains name was easy, given how truly ridiculous some could be. 

Tim and Damian were still after the “Illusive Blue Man” that he totally made up that one time he walked into a poll and had a huge black eye that he couldn’t quite explain…Oh man, he had to stop telling such elaborate lies and just say “I fought with a few guys last night” without more explanation. 

But he couldn’t help it. And those kids believed everything he said, it was too tempting…But for now, this wasn’t the issue. Nope. 

He did a quick check of his body and knew he wasn’t really hurt (thanks “dad” for the amazing body armor ugh ?), so he was planning on leaving that poor girl’s house and send a mystery check in the mail to pay for the damage (money stolen from a certain Bruce Wayne of course, as if he would pay himself). 

Yup. He was just gonna stand up, and go on his way and…somehow, he found himself sitting on the stool opposite side of this mysterious girl, and now she was peppering salt on his hand ? 

“Salt”, she says, and she has a cute drunk voice. Jason almost forgets he just went through a window a few minutes ago. 

“Tequila”, she continues, downing her drink and pointing at the one she poured him. He doesn’t even care the she poured it in a cereal bowl that she didn’t even seem to have clean…He drunk worst things in worst recipient. He turns away to take off his mask and so that she can’t see his face, and “bottom’s up”. 

“Lemon !” she finishes, biting into the sour fruit and spitting it in the direction of the trashcan but missing completely. The lemon wedge goes to lost itself amongst his fallen brothers…

Jason bites into his own lemons, and spits it. Right into the garbage. 

There’s a slight pause, where she just stares at the trashcan, and then at Jason, back to the trashcan, and then turns to him again and simply says : 

“Wow.” 

************

So. This was surreal. 

Here you were. In your home. Taking tequila shots. With…Red Hood. 

One of Gotham’s night vigilante. The most violent one. But the dude seemed chilled. He was holding his liquor really well. 

And now you were talking about your broken heart, telling him the story as if he’d been your friend for years. And he was listening. Intently. And reacting to what you were saying. It had been a LONG time, since you had this kind of talk with anyone, and despite the fact you were drunk, you still noticed how nice it felt to have someone to talk to. Someone that genuinely listened. 

“And then he slept with her !” you say angrily. 

“Nooooooo !?!” 

“Yes, he did ! He slept with…with…what was her name…”

“Nicole. From accounting.” 

“Right, Nicole from accounting ! That bitch ! She always just…counts and shit ! And he slept with her ! Nicole from accounting ! Whom he met thanks to me, by the way ! At a partyyyy !! At my wooooork !!” 

“What an ass.” 

“Right ?! Oh but he had such a good ass though…Quite firm. But whenever he wore jeans, it was super flat.” 

“So, not such a good ass in the end then ?” 

“I guess not. You have a good ass. Popping right out in this outfit of yours.” 

Red Hood chuckles, and the sound of his laughter makes you forget that you just said something incredibly embarrassing. His voice is…nice. Deep. Manly. You like it. You wanna make him chuckle some more, so you say, hoping : 

“And it looks very firm. Not just quite firm.” 

It works. He snorts and it’s very cute. Oh wow. He can be sexy and cute. Full package. You smile a bit dreamily. 

For a second, he’s lost in that smile of yours, and there’s a silence installing itself in the room. A comfortable one. That you break : 

“Ok. So now, he’s not that perfect anymore ! He got no ass ! Penalty points ! I never notice how un-assed he was before…” 

Jason smiles and damn. He’s hot. 

Somewhere along the way, he stopped turning his face away from you whenever he took a shot, and just ended up taking his helmet off. He was probably hoping that you’d black out or something, so you wouldn’t remember his face (or he just didn’t care). 

In any case, you were pretty sure you never saw him before. His face kinda reminded you of an old memory. Of someone you saw somewhere long ago, when you were a kid…Which wasn’t really a big help right ? 

Right. You had no idea who he was. And in your drunken state, probably couldn’t piece anything together anyway. So even if you did know who he could be, you wouldn’t know in the end anyway…Makes perfect sense right ?

What you knew was : he’s hot. 

This white streak in his hair did something to you that you couldn’t explain. And that jawline ? You would love to get cut on that bitch.  It could actually cut a bitch, you were sure of it. Those blue eyes ? You’ve never seen someone with such blue eyes. And did you mention to yourself how muscular he was ? Because man you only saw guys like this in magazines ! 

But beyond his handsome features, he seemed like a nice guy. Like he was listening to you, a total stranger. And this realization suddenly raised your guard up. 

You also thought that your ex-cheating-boyfriend was a nice guy. And come to think of it, who the hell just barge in someone’s home like that, and actually stay to drink tequila shots ?! Wait but…in your guts…it’s not like with your ex. 

You don’t think he’s a nice guy. You know he is. 

************

There’s a visible shift in your mood, after this realization. So far, you talked to him about your broken heart freely, and he listened. 

Oddly enough, no words that came out of your (perfect) mouth bored him. Jason wasn’t sure wether it was the alcohol or not, but you captivated him. 

But in a split second, and without him knowing why, your features changed. You were now frowning. Like an unhappy little kid. It was kinda cute, but he didn’t like it because…why were you frowning ? 

He tries to lighten up the mood and says : 

“Well here you go. See, you didn’t loose the perfect guy, his ass was flat in jeans. Can’t work with that, can you ? I bet we can find other flaws. Make you realize he actually was a looser.”  

Your guard is up, but you can’t help but smile a bit, plus you were frowning just now because you realized you just knew you could trust that total stranger, and it was so weird…. 

Besides, no harm in indulging this, because you’re pretty sure it’ll make you feel better to try and see the bad side of your ex-boyfriend, not just his good ones. No one was perfect. And so, still a bit careful, you say : 

“Well…He never got any of my Tv shows or movie references.” 

“Well, here’s a point to take off of his “perfectness”. Doesn’t get pop culture references. Deal breaker.” 

“Yeah…Yeah you’re right. It is. He also used to hate when I made jokes. I like puns ya know ? Terrible ones. Well, he was always embarrassed whenever I made them in public.” 

“Ashamed of his girlfriend, doesn’t sound very gentlemanly, right ?” 

“Yeah. It doesn’t. Maybe he wasn’t such a perfect gentleman…He also used to not want to go out with me if I didn’t wear any make-up and was dressed just casually.” 

“What you mean, he never just went out with you ?” 

“We only went out on dates. I had to dress up. I could be casual home though…” 

“Well goodie, the man let you be yourself when you were home. Big deal. To be honest, sounds like a douchey move.” 

“That was kinda douchey…I never cared what he looked like.” 

And it’s true. For you, physical appearance wasn’t everything. And sure you thought your ex was hot and all, but only because you liked his personality too. You liked his jokes, you were never ashamed of anything he said. 

And right now, sure that stranger that bursted through your window was hot, but the reason you felt like you could tell him things was because he just made you comfortable by his mere aura. Because he gave you such a good vibe. 

You never were fully about appearances. It was always just a bonus for you…So it never occurred to you why your ex would only hang out in public with you if you were pampered. Like he used to hate when you just wore hoodies and no make-up, even if you didn’t need make-up to be beautiful. 

Comes to think of it, he was very much about appearances…Uh. Interesting. You never realized that before. 

You turn to Red Hood, and the look on your face says it all. You’re slowly realizing maybe you didn’t just lost “the one”. The vigilante says : 

“Ok, so : no ass, no humor apparently, doesn’t get pop culture references, and was kind of a jerk when it came to going out with you…” 

“He did tell me often that I was beautiful though. Including when I just woke up from a night out, and was awful looking.”

“Yeah, but he never went out with you looking like that. He shouldn’t feel ashamed of hanging out with you looking like that. Just like he shouldn’t feel embarrassed when you joke. He can be exasperated, like if you really make bad puns, sure. And he can think it’s unfunny…But embarrassed ? No.” 

“I guess…I never thought about it.” 

“Well let me tell you, as someone who does not know neither you nor him personally, he sounds like a bit of a jerk. Let’s not forget he cheated as well. Like, that’s not something good people do. Especially not with…Nicole from accounting.” 

“Nicole from accounting…Yeah. They’re together now though.” 

“So ? He should’ve broken up with you if he realized he liked her. That’s the right thing to do. Trust me on that, I put villains behind bars for a living, I know what’s right or wrong.” 

“I heard you kill criminals.” 

“Used to. I used to kill criminals, I had issues. I’ll tell you one day if you wanna. It’s a real tear jerker story. With clowns and crowbars. And I’m telling you that because I’m drunk, right now. Also, if we want to be specific, I don’t actually make a living out of putting villains behind bars. Like, I don’t get paid or anything…” 

Jason finds himself ranting about anything that comes to his mind, and though he hears himself claim it’s because of the alcohol he’s saying all this, he realizes maybe there’s something else making him want to talk. 

You. A total stranger he walked upon. Or rather, went-through-the-window upon.  Who didn’t freak out when he went through said window. And instead, invited him over to have tequila shots. 

Because, according to your grandmother, the best remedy to…basically any problems in life, was “salt, tequila, lemon”. 

“She was a wise woman.” 

He says, and you turn to him, clearly not understanding what he was talking about. 

“Who ?” 

“Your grandma. For saying that salt, tequila and lemon was a great remedy against heartbreaks and all.” 

“Oh. Yeah. I wouldn’t know, I never met her. She died before I was born.” 

“Well what she passed on to your parents is great.” 

“What ?”

“Well, that “salt, tequila and lemon” thing, I assume she said that to your mom or dad, and then they said that to you, and then it became your grandma’s advice. Right ?” 

“…Nah. It’s an excuse I made up. Whenever I need to justify something, I just say “like my grandma said, ain’t no shame in eating an entire tub of ice cream if you want to”, and then people are just like “oh yeah, cool”, because when you say the word “grandma”, then it gives a perspective to your words ya know ?” 

Jason had no idea what you were on about, but he loved it. You seemed to be very smart. And witty. And funny. The hell did that guy cheated on you for ? And why was he ashamed of going out in public with you when you weren’t dressed up ?! 

You currently wore “Hello Kitty” pyjamas, had absolutely no make up on, and your hair was a mess, and he thought you looked gorgeous.

“Why are you so nice ?” 

Your question takes him by surprise, and for a few seconds he doesn’t register it and just says : “ugh ?” 

“To me. Why are you so nice to me ? Is it the alcohol ? Does it make you nice ? Or are you just nice to every stranger ? Every girl you destroy the windows of ? Or are you like my ex ? You seem nice, but then you go off and cheat on your girl simply because you like another girl and you’re too cowardly to break up with your current girl ?” 

Jason hiccups slightly, and says : 

“No, I’m not nice to any girl I met. I’m actually usually kind of a jerk, too “brutally honest”. But you…I don’t know. You give me good feelings. Oh and here’s to add on his flaws list. “Coward”. Can’t even break up with a girl, has to wait to get caught red-handed and break her heart. Cooooward. Bad flaw. Kind of guy who runs in the face of danger, instead of standing by you.” 

It’s probably the fact that he said “you give me good feelings” that spurs this in you. That gives you a new clearer perspective on things. 

“My heart wasn’t broken.”

It’s a shock, to you. This realization. This sudden feeling jumping in your face. You…are not heartbroken. You’re mad. You’re frustrated. You feel betrayed. You feel a crazy burning anger towards your ex for toying around with you like that. For not having the balls to just break up, after spending two years together. 

He was suppose to know you. To be your friend. Things could have turned out better. He could have just come up to you, say the truth, and…You were pretty sure you’d still be friend. Because he really was a great guy. 

He really was all the good thing you though about him. He made a mistake, an unforgivable one in your book. But he was a great guy. 

He was just…not your great guy. Not anymore at least. 

And you realized, there, quite drunk, that…It was ok.  

Your heart wasn’t broken.  

Your heart wasn’t broken. 

Your pride was. Your trust was. But your heart ? …Maybe you weren’t completely in love with him. You were best friends, yes, but love ? Maybe it wasn’t love…

Your heart wasn’t broken. 

“My heart isn’t broken.” 

You tell Red hood, looking at him right in his wonderful ocean blue eyes. And he looks right back at you, and just nods. Just like that. And then he pours you one last tequila shot. 

Because like your grandma would say : “When you make great discovery about yourself…Salt, tequila, lemon”. 

************

It took you only a few hours with him to realize that you weren’t in love with your ex, and that was kinda scary. Because this realization didn’t come from nowhere. 

Nope. 

But when he said that your ex broke your heart, you felt obligated to tell him that no. No your heart wasn’t broken. You were sad and angry, yes, but not heartbroken. For you, in that moment, it was important for this total stranger to know you weren’t actually in love. 

Hell, you didn’t even know yourself you weren’t that in love before you talked to him. It just came as a sudden, yet utterly true revelation. 

Because, and this wasn’t the alcohol speaking…You felt incredibly attracted to that guy. To Red Hood. Not just because of the white streak in his hair, and the eyes, and smile, and voice, and abs, and thick thighs. That too, sure, but not only…Nope. 

Nope. Not because of this. 

But because he had a tough day (he said so himself, explaining to you how he went through the window…he was fighting a super-villain when he got flung through your window, tough tough time ahem), and yet he sat with a crazy lady that peppered salt on his hand and practically forced him to take a tequila shot…

Because you could see in his eyes, and felt in your guts that he didn’t have an easy life…and yet he took a break from whatever he was doing to just sit with you and listen to you. He didn’t even make sense, that you trusted those feelings so fiercely. And yet, you did. Because he listened to you. 

He saw you were struggling and he stayed. And though you felt you couldn’t trust anyone at that time…You oddly felt like he was ok. 

Like he wouldn’t be the kind of guy to cheat, or run in the face of danger, leaving you all alone to fight off demons. 

In a few short hours, you fell for this guy more than you ever fell for your ex. 

What did that say about you uh ? …That was pretty pathetic…

************

Jason didn’t think that you were pathetic at all. 

On the contrary. If he went to seat with you, and drink with you, is because he was instantly mesmerized by you. 

And though he didn’t know at first why, now he was sure of it. 

It’s because you didn’t freak out. And something told him it wasn’t only because you were a bit drunk (he fell in drunk people’s home before…none reacted like you). 

Nope. It was because you were special. He just knew it. Special in every way. Funny. Beautiful. Genuinely listening to him when he was speaking. 

He peppered his own problems within your story, as you told him. And you listened. Hell, even referenced a few things he said early on, way later, while you were crazy drunk. You listened. 

You gave a total stranger that seemed to have a tough day some salt. And tequila. And lemons. 

And then you cared. You asked him a thousand times if he was ok, and he basically had to take off his armor to prove it so (to your eyes’ greatest pleasure…mm mm mm those muscles). 

Captivated. He was captivated by you. It was strange, and though he knew it was because you were special, he still was unclear as to why his feelings were that strong. 

For someone he just met. And barely knew. And only knew while drunk. 

You were just…Special. 

************

It was surreal. The all thing. 

What started as a night where you planned on wallowing your pain and drinking…ended up changing your life. 

And no one could convince you that it wasn’t Fate. Because what were the odds that Red Hood would fall through YOUR window after tripping (yeah you didn’t buy that “fighting super-villains thing” at all) ?

What were the odds of his timing being so perfect, arriving just before you started to cry ? Because there was no doubt in your mind that if he had come a few seconds later, he wouldn’t have stayed. 

He would have found a crying mess, and maybe he would have tried to confort you but…You wouldn’t have answered. In your “sad phase”, you only cry and whine. He would have eventually left. And the wonderful talk you’d just have, would never have happened. 

But instead. He came right before your lips touch that fatal shot of tequila that would have brought you into the “sad phase”. And took your drunkness down a notch. Rerouted your evening. 

You weren’t wallowing anymore, you were ranting. 

Sharing your anger and frustration. 

And he helped you realize that your ex wasn’t that perfect…That maybe it was just not meant to be…After all, he cheated on you. 

Uh. What a shame. You didn’t even know his name…”Red Hood”…

You wished you knew his name. 

************

The morning lights were rising, and the bottle of tequila was long gone. 

There were still salt and lemons though. For some reason, you decided to buy the entire grocery store’s stock of lemons. 

Red Hood stood up, and said he had to go. 

He was nice about it. Said it was a pleasure to have spend the night with you. You both laughed about the innuendos that ensued. 

You were exactly on the same page. And he understood all your joke referencing to pop culture… 

But it was time for him to go. And he apparently had no intention of telling you his real name. He didn’t hint either at ever coming back to see you again. 

And there was that. Just a nice night, spend talking to a genuine friend that you’ll never see again. 

A genuine friend that you didn’t even know a few hours before. 

Maybe it was the alcohol speaking. Maybe not. 

And even if you ended up never seeing him again, this evening truly changed your life…At least, it saved you from a heartbreak. Made you realize it wasn’t that.

Though, now, as he climbs out of the window again (he couldn’t possibly use the front door), you feel like the actual heartbreak is starting. 

Grandma’s remedy against heartbreak ? Right. 

Salt, tequila, lemon…

But the tequila is all gone. 

“I’ll send someone to fix that window…Sorry again about that. …Bye.” are his last words, and then he’s out. 

And the tequila is all gone. 

************

… 

…

…

…

Days pass by in a blur. 

Salt. Tequila. Lemon. 

Ugh. But you don’t want to this time. You don’t want to get drunk to forget. 

You don’t want to forget him. And you know it’s ridiculous to get that worked up over a guy you met one night and that will never come back. That you didn’t even know the name of. 

This entire night was weird anyway. 

Getting drunk with a dangerous night vigilante. Pouring your heart out to him, and him doing the same. The hell were you even thinking ? 

Salt. Tequila. Lemon. 

That would be a good idea to do this right now, because man…your heart hurt. More than when you discovered your ex sleeping with Nicole. From accounting. But you can’t resolve yourself to drink. To forget. Nope. Instead you…

*Knock knock knock*. 

Uh ? You take a quick look at your clock in the kitchen.10 pm. Who the hell is coming at 10 pm ?! It can only be bad news. Especially in Gotham…You peep into the eyehole and…

WHAT ?! 

You open your door quickly, and… 

“Told you I’d send someone to fix your window.” 

It’s him. It’s Red hood. But in…civilian clothes. 

His ass doesn’t look flat in jeans. 

He’s holding a window wrapped in cardboard, and there’s a toolbox at his feet. 

“Yeah, you did…come in.” 

************

Jason Todd. 

That’s his name. And connections are fast to be made in your brain. Jason Todd. Bruce Wayne’s adopted son. That supposedly died…ten years ago. 

And is Red Hood now. Oh. It makes sense. Even his little “killing criminals” thing while Batman never killed. You easily put two and two together. 

Red Hood. Jason Todd. Bruce Wayne. 

Wow. Can’t believe you never guessed that before. Of course Bruce Wayne is Batman. He’s got the motive, the means, the excuses…It’s so obvious. And yet, you never realized. And no one else in Gotham ever realized. 

Jason Todd. 

Now you know his name. 

And he’s fixing your window. Nobody ever fixed windows for you before (even those who broke it).

Um. To add to the “perfect man” list : “Handy”. 

Jason Todd.  

He quickly works the window up, and then he turns to you. While he was working you talked, as if you knew each other for years. Joking around. Like old friends. Like old extremely good and close friends. 

It fits. It clicks. It’s natural. You and him, him and you. 

Barely knowing each others, and yet knowing each others the best. 

Jason. Todd. 

He turns to you now, and with a smirk, he says : 

“Ya know, my grandma always say that when something good happens to you, you need to celebrate. And I feel like this, right now, you and I, though I have no idea what we’re doing and where it’s going…Well it’s still something to celebrate. And she always says, my grandma, that to celebrate perfectly you need…” 

You smile. 

Yeah. You don’t know where this thing between you two is going, but you do know that you never met someone who so fully understood you. 

And in such a short span of time. And you know you’re not mistaking. It’s a feeling too strong to be a mistake. 

He came back to fix your window for god’s sake. And trusted you enough to tell you his actual name. Without a second thought. Which meant everything. Especially since from all the hint he let slip through last time you saw each others, about his father, well…let’s just say telling people his real name wasn’t really something he was used to. 

But it just works. It fits. It clicks. It’s not like with your ex, because you don’t think you know it does. It just does. The fact that you say those next few words in perfect sync finishes to convince you : 

(“…And she always says, my grandma, that to celebrate perfectly you need…”) 

“Salt, tequila, and lemons.” 

______________________________________________

I’m so mad the Tumblr app crashed and I deleted the original post...Y’all were great and reblogged the hell out of it ! Which is why it got so many notes in such a short span of times. And feedbacks. I haven’t had that many feedbacks on a story in a long time. So just one last time and I won’t bother you with that again : Please, if you enjoyed this story, don’t hesitate to reblog it and share it with others. People who don’t follow me can’t really find my stories anymore so...you’re a big help by spreading them. It’s always very encouraging. 

And if you got the time, feedbacks are always hella appreciated and always make my day a little brighter <3. 

[the-settingsun]

We're all gonna die - Edward Nygma x reader. Songfic

Please listen to the song as you read.

Quick songfic about my dear Eddie. Because he needs to be protected. My precisious baby boy. Feel free to request and give feedback I'd appreciate it. Also I dont proofread so point out any mistakes to me.

Gif credit to the owner.

Warnings : Blood, mentions of abuse, injuries.

The evil it spread like a fever ahead

,,What can be lost but never found?" Your boyfriend yelled at you while he took another bottle of alcohol and drank it in one go. The thunder encouraged him to put down the bottle on the small wooden table beside the window. He slowly started approaching you, you were expecting him to insult you again and his words schocked you. He wiped his nose with his hand and smirked ,,Do you like riddles?" He fake frowned ,,Or just the riddle man?". You froze, he found out about Eddie. Only man who treat you right. The GCPD was a pretty small after all. You knew what was this man infront of you capable of. ,,Please dont hurt him" you whispered looking down at your bare legs. ,,Honey, you know its for your own good" he purred into your ear. ,, Please stop" you said as quietly as possible. There was no point in fighting him, he always got what he wanted.

It was night when you died, my firefly.

After he was done with you he left like always. Broken glass, broken furniture and broken bones.

You didnt feel anything, your body wasnt yours anymore, your mind was black. But oh the floor the cold floor that make your skin crawl. Was is the floor or the blood? No one can tell. Cold, as the raging storm outside. The thunders couldnt be heard anymore but the lightning helped you see, always for a split second.

What could I have said to raise you from the dead?

Oh could I be the sky on the Fourth of July?

As you watched the same picture appear before you for hours you gave up. The pain was not worth it. It was time to move on, past the small ligh provided by your eyes that got already used to the dark. You were ready to see the light. It was silence, you cried softly as you slowly pulled your hand from the wound caused by the glass shards.With the very last strenght you had you managed to reach broken table, with one leg missing. Your whole body weight was now relying on it. The crimson shined for a brief moment, another lightning. You fell again getting tiny pieces of wood stuck in your already bloody arm. The pain kicked in as you tried to reach the phone. Every step you took was followed by lightning, displaying the silluettes of broken window on the floor beneath your feet. You reached the phone and pushed yourself against the wall. Looking at your wound and bloody hands putting pressure on it. You sensed you had last few moment infrotn of you. And so you dialed the number

Edward Nygma

1234567891011

Call

Text

Well you do enough talk

The moment you heard the dial tone you broke down. There was so much you didnt do in life, you wanted to

tell Edward everything, have amazing dates, help your daughter with her boyfriends, cry during your son's wedding. But now it was all gone in the clouds. ,, Hello this is Ed.Im sorry I cant currently talk leave a message" you put the phone down on the ground anf sighted.

My little hawk, why do you cry?

,

,Ed? Are you th-there?" Your lips slowly moved ,, (Y/N) is that you? Whats wrong? Where are you? Are you hurt" Ed spoke quickly through the screen. ,,Im home, I dont have much time, I-I-I think I-I'll die Ed. Im afraid" you heard him curse quietly,the some rumbling and door opening. Meanwhile you tried to adjust your position but your hand couldnt support you. So you sat there against cabinet slowly bleeding, looking at the ceiling above, clutching your stomach. You couldnt make out anything from the call except : Jim, help and Ed's panicking voice ,,(Y/N) talk to me please)"

Tell me what did you learn from the Tillamook burn?

Or the Fourth of July?

You glanced at the clock, it was past midnight. ,,Ed can you believe it? I made it to another day" you chuckled and hissed in pain right after. ,,(Y/N) please hang on, Im coming, the ambulance is coming, you are gonna make it" This time it wasnt his typical panic voice. Ed was crying. You blinked and more tears fell down on you sleeves.

,,Ed, Im sorry"

We're all gonna die

You heard him sight,,No, (Y/N) there is nothing to be sorry for. Its all my fault" he said and his voice broke ,,I should have seen it, I should have protected you" he let out a sob and began crying and sobbin more. ,,Eddie? I-I, you're right I should have told someone. But please dont blame yourself. Dont" you whined and put your hand over your mouth. You focused so much on your sobs you couldnt hear Ed. ,,-I cant lose you (Y/N), you are the only one that ever accepted me" he went silent. Or was it you?

Sitting at the bed with the halo at your head

Was it all a disguise, like Junior High

Where everything was fiction, future, and prediction

Now, where am I?

My fading supply

It was all too much, everything too fast and too slow at the same time.

Your cries overpowered the sound of now returned thunders as you heard cars going by below your window. ,,It hurts" you screamed in pain as you moved your arn away to overlook the injury again. ,,We're almost there (Y/N) just hold on."

,,Did you actually mean it?" Once again you asked but now with smile on your face. ,,Or is it just faded memory?" Remembering events of last weekend when you two attended police ball, he pretended to be your ,,scary" boyfriend infront of bunch of arrogant officers. Ed cleared his throath and gulped

,, The ball?" there was silence. You knew you couldnt stand up so you carefully started sliding yourself closer to the floor. ,,I did, you (Y/N) are the most beautiful, trustworthy and inteligent person I know" you stopped, only youd neck was now againt the cabinet. ,,Funny I thought you were just bluffing"

Did you get enough love, my little dove

Why do you cry?

,,What happened (Y/N) I thought you two were happy" you went silent letting the thunder be answer. You used your free habd to push yourself away from the cabinet. Now you were just laying there ,,I thought so too Ed. I loved him I did. I told myself" he kept silent you presumed he was close. Despite thunders you heard a train on the other line. The train station. He wasn't gonna make it. There wasnt enough time for him to hold you in his arms. ,,I love you Ed" you whispered loud enough for it to be heard. He took a deep breath. You messed up, but he deserves to know.

,,I love you so much (Y/N), now you cant leave here alone. I-I cant make it withouth you"

And I'm sorry I left, but it was for the best

Though it never felt right

My little Versailles

,,Isnt it funny? I was always too scred to tell you and now" you coughed and gasped for air ,,we cant be together anyways. Maybe we could be another tragic pair of lovers like in the books" you softly laughted before you strated coughing again. It was blood, but at your state there wasnt place around there wasnt blood. ,,(Y/N) It was me who bought you the flowers not officer-" you stopped him ,,I always knew, the wws this little voice in my head that i-i-it was y-you." You winced as breathed. Last minutes.

The hospital asked should the body be cast

Before I say goodbye, my star in the sky

Such a funny thought to wrap you up in cloth

Do you find it all right, my dragonfly?

,, Eddie, we both know how is it going to end. I just do-do-ont want you to blame yourse-lf" you both inhales sharply. You because speaking makes you weaker and Ed because he was having a war with himself right now.,,No" you were silent. ,,No, there will not be anything I'd have to regret!" He yelled and cried at the same time. Poor Eddie, you knew how vulnerable he was. ,,If I die" I dont want you to visit me. ,, I wouldnt want you to dwell on the past. I'll be a dead end. Literally" you giggled a little before Ed screamed through the phone ,,FOR GODS SAKE (Y/N) YOU ARE DYING. STOP JOKING ABOUT IT."

,,Sorry, sorry. I am serious. Do-Do not attend my funereal, dont bring me flowers, dont get involved in the case." whispering you wiped your tears for the first time.

,,Why (Y/N)? So am I supposed to forget about you? If you are telling truth and you do love which I certainly hope you do. You are the love of my life (Y/N)." Once again the muffled cried from the other side of the phone were drown out by the now stronger storm. ,,Because I would break you"

Shall we look at the moon, my little loon

Why do you cry?

,,Tell me a-a-a ridd-d-riddle Edd-Eddi-Ed" you sighted as you felt your breath slowing down every minute. ,,What are the three words that are said too much, but not enough"

,,I love you"

,,So do I"

Silence.

Make the most of your life, while it is rife

,,H-H-El-Hell-Hello?" You coughed so hard your head raised from the ground only to fall back there.

,, Im here (Y/N), Jim is here. You are here. Im not losing you now."

He hanged up.

While it is light

The front door opened and the lights turned off. It shocked your body and you gasped. A figure was kneeling next to you. It was Edward Nygma. The one you loved.

Well you do enough talk

,,I wanted to grow old with you

(Y/N). I still want to. Dont.leave.me" Ed held you tighter and put his hand on your cheek and as he slowly sobbed. Hie glasses were wet from his tears and rain. He was a shaking mess. You looked into his eyes. And smiled.

My little hawk, why do you cry?

Tell me what did you learn from the Tillamook burn?

Or the Fourth of July?

We're all gonna die

You lifted up the hanf that was on your wound. Ed quickly put it back, applying the pressuee back. Being confused and still pouring his soul out through tears. You sturggled and released yourself from his grip. You hand was now cupping his cheek. With every little strenght you had you barely leaned forward and pecked edwards lips he was just starring at you, knowing its the end. With that, he pressed you towards him harder and frantically held you thinking you could disappear in every second. With that the ambulance arrived and...

We're all gonna die

We're all gonna die

We're all gonna die

We're all gonna die

We're all gonna die

We're all gonna die

We're all gonna die

Name : (Y/N) (L/N)

Date of death : 4th of july

[rvnjun]

nct 2018 reacts | their idol crush gets made fun of by an mc

warnings: idk if this is a warning but the reader gets made fun of for their looks sometimes genre: angst but all fluffy paring: nct x fem!reader a/n: I didn't add gifs because i'm lazy and my computer crashes when I try adding more than 9 gifs to a post

taeil

Taeil would be playing with his hands, he was very nervous, it wasn't easy being on the same show as the person you've been crushing on forever. His ears would perk up when he heard your name mentioned. “You look like a frog trying to walk on two legs,” the mc said while watching your dancing. Immediately he felt his heart drop. He looked at your expression and felt his anger boil, it was obvious that you were hurt. “Hey, dancing isn't easy, you should try it,” Taeil spoke quietly while looking at his hands. He looked up to see you smiling brightly at him

taeyong

“How can a leader be so quiet and reserved? Shouldn't it be you to peak up and not your members?” the host asked after another membered explained the album and not you. “Well actually during comebacks someone gets assigned to remember what to say about the album, its not always the leader,” Taeyong defended. He could tell you seemed hurt and he didn't like seeing his biggest crush offended. The host nodded in response, he didn't expect Taeyong to defended you like that, he was intimidated. Once the camera were off you'd go over and thank him for sticking up for you.

johnny

“I literally didn't know that you were in this comeback. Where were you in the mv and where are your lines?” the host asked while looking at you. Truth be told, you didn't know why you didn't get many lines nor why you didn't have much screen time. “I really don't know,” you mumbled while looking at the water bottle in front of you. Johnny nodded his head, he knew what it was like to work so hard for something and have it still be out of your reach. The hosts laughed “Apparently there is something very wrong with you,” he said while trying to move on to the next topic. Johnny rolled his eyes, he placed a reassuring hand over yours and gave you a calming smile. “Don't listen to him, okay? Even though you don't have many lines this comeback you shine brighter than your members,” he encouraged. You nodded your head and tried to calm your beating heart. Johnny's words really helped you and you made sure that you needed to hank him the next time you saw him

yuta

“If we are talking about looks here than Y/N is definitely at the bottom,” the mc said while laughing along with the others. Your eyes widened, you were surprised to hear his words. Yuta was too, he had always had a crush on you and thought of you as the most beautiful women he had ever met. “No, Y/N would be at the top,” Yuta corrected while sending the mc a deathly glare. You giggled and sent a smirk over to mc. Yuta couldn't help but laugh at your new found confidence

ten

Your Korean wasn't the best and you'd be the first person to admit it. Despite knowing about your lack of Korean speaking skills you didn't like being made fun of for them. However making fun of your speaking seemed to be what every host did, it was their favorite thing. Ten had noticed this, throughout the entirety of filming the host would reoccurringly laugh at how you said things or when you forgot a word. By the end of filming Ten noticed that you weren't speaking as much, he would feel extremely bad so he approached you and said. “Y/N dont listen to them, its not easy learning another language. I bet none of them can speak 2 languages (or more).” You smiled at his words, he had a point. “Thanks, Ten,” you said with a charming smile. Ten would nod and decide to help you for the rest of filming, he didnt care if the fans noticed

doyoung

“And you are the main vocalist? How in the world did that happen?” the host asked after listening to you singing your favorite song on your new album. You were clearly taken back by his statement, you had been called a terrible vocalist before but always by angi fans, never by a host. “And you are the main host? How in the world did that happen?” Doyoung sasssed back while sending the host a glare. You giggled at him causing his heart to flutter. The host simply looked at the floor and burned red in embarrassment while everyone laughed at him

kun

Kun was standing next to you while your members talked about your new song and the highlight parts. He was already extremely nervous because of this comeback and being next to his crush made his nerves 10x worse. “I keep forgetting your not a 6 membered group and that there is 7 of you,” the host said while gesturing to you. You had taken a hiatus because of health problems and this was your first comeback back. Kun couldn't control his expression, his faced formed into confusion before it went to pure anger. Once the camera were off and you guys were leaving Kun leaned over and whispered in your ear “Don't listen to him Y/N. Sometimes I forget you aren't a solo artist because you shine so much compared to your members,” he winked at you before walking away. You brought your hand up to your heart and tried to control its rapid beating

jaehyun

Jaehyun awkwardly rubbed the back of his neck while the host started asking questions about his personal life. When his ideal type was mentioned the host brought up if any of the other girls on the show matched his ideal type. Truthfully, he wanted to answer yes and mention you but of course he knew that he couldn't do that. “Well I can tell you this, it isnt Y/N,” the host added while making everyone laugh except for you and Jaehyun. Jaehyun could tell from your expression that you were hurt, being made fun of for your looks was a recurring thing for you on variety shows. “Actually, I was going to say Y/N is the closest person to my ideal type,” he said making your cheeks turn crimson

winwin

Winwin didn't know what to say or do, all he knew was that he wanted to stick up for you. He looked at the hosts before choosing to not speak up yet and instead say something later. Once the filming was over you were mentally and physically exhausted. “Y/N? Id like to apologize for not sticking up for you earlier, I should have said something,” he said with an apologetic smile. You shook your head “Its okay Winwin, im glad you said something now,” you said making him feel much better, like a weight had been lifted from his shoulders. “Uh, here is my number. Call if you need anything,” Winwin said before rushing away to his managers

jungwoo

Jungwoo took a bite of the ice cream and continued to walk with a skip in his step. Today was a good day, the sun was shining, he got ice cream, and he was able to film a show with his idol crush. “You know Y/N, I wouldn't eat on camera if I were you, you look like a donkey,” the mc said while they changed the cameras out. “Oh,,,okay,” you said while tossing the cone away. You felt sick to your stomach, why hasn't someone told you the truth before.”Y/N,” Jungwoo mumbled while walking next to you. You looked away, embarrassed to be called a donkey while in the presence of Jungwoo. “Don't listen to him, you look perfectly fine, stunning actually,” he said with a cheeky grin. You giggled at his words and thank him. Jungwoo placed a short but sweet kiss on your cheek

lucas

You followed close behind Lucas, he tall stature and broad shoulders helped shield you from the harsh winds. He had told you to stay behind him, that he could lead the way back and you felt bad. You wanted to be able to help out more but you were already sick due to the lack of food and the freezing rain. Byungman had insisted that you and Lucas go and find some wood but what eh didn't realize that a huge storm was going to hit. Now you two were stuck in it while trying to get back to base camp. After what felt like hours you were completely worn out, and it was noticeable. Your fever had raised and you kept coughing. Once you got back Lucas was beyond worried for you “Y/N you're so useless right now and you're literally the ugliest thing i've ever seen,” one of the guests on the show said while laughing. Lucas scrunched his face up in confusion “She is sick, id like to see you try and walk 2 miles in this storm while sick. I think she still looks beautiful,” Lcas said while giving yo a soft smile.

mark

“Y/N you look like a lifeless corpse,” the host said with a laugh while pointing at your makeupless face. You looked at him with wide eyes and hid yourself behind your hands. “Im sorry, let me go apply my makeup,” you said while turning around and returning to your room. “Y/N I think you look even more stunning, if that's possible,” he smoothly flirted without realizing. The hosts were surprised by his words, just like you. “Oh my, thank you Mark,” you giggled while removing your hands from your face with a new found confidence causing Mark to smile proudly.

renjun

You sat in the chair and played with your fingers while you waited to be called back on set. Biting your lip you did your best to hide back the tears but it was really hard. No one liked getting made fun of for their looks, especially not in front of their crush. You looked up and wiped your tears when you heard someone in front of you cough. “Hey Y/N,” Renjun said while he looked down at you. “Hello Renjun,” you simply said before looking back down. You tried to hold them back but they kept falling.”Y/N don't listen to them, you're a beautiful girl, there literally isnt a single flaw on you,” Renjuns words took you by surprise. You looked up at him with light pink cheeks. Renun sighed and cupped your face in his hands before wiping your tears with his thumb. “I mean it”

jeno

Jeno held the microphone tighter than usual, his eyes were burning holes into the camera and his poster was picture perfect. “Y/N, you read the wrong line, who invited you to be the guess mc?” the other mc asked while staring at you. Jeno furrowed his eyebrows and looked over at you. You lightly laughed and tried to keep a smile. Once the camera were off you rushed away so you could cry. “Y/N!” Jeno called out while reaching for your hand. You stopped in your tracks and looked at him with a wry smile. “Don't listen to him, you did great,” he said sending an eruption of butterflies in your stomach

haechan

Haechan scoffed at the hosts joke. “Its not cool to make fun of someone for something they cant control,” he said while sending him a sharp glare. The host looked back at Haechan “What did you just say to me?” he asked, testing the younger boy. “I said dont make fun of someone for something they cant control,” Haechan snapped back. You watched from Haechan side with a glint in your eyes. No one had ever stuck up for you like that. “Thank you haechan, I mean it,” you mumbled to him before leaning up and placing a soft kiss on his cheek. Haechan watched in awe as you walked ahead, his hand went up to the spot where your lips once were and he beamed

jaemin

You yelped slightly as you slipped on the floor, your hand reached out for something to hold onto so you wouldn't fall. Grabbing Jaemins forearm tightly you caught your balance. You sent Jaemin an apologetic smile, he had been helping you out all day. “Wow Y/N, dont you think Jaemin is tired of taking care of you, its like he is babysitting,” the host started to laugh at his own joke, others joined in. You stopped and looked over at him. Jaemin didnt mind taking care of you, you were his biggest crush and he liked having you cling to him. “Please dont put words in my mouth, I dont mind it at all,” he said with giving you a soft smile

chenle

The host stared at your beat red face, you were in the middle of trying to think of a reply but couldn't come up with anything. Instead you opted to sutter out a incomprehensible “yes.” The host rolled his eyes at you before looking at the producer “Why did you invite her, she can't even answer a simple question. How are you a idol?” he tried to play it off as funny but you were very much hurt by it. You knew you were shy and awkward and you did your best to get over it. “I think her shyness makes her even more cuter,” Chenle piped up out of nowhere. You sent Chenle a thankful smile, no one had ever stuck up for you like that, especially not a cute boy

jisung

Jisung watched in awe as your body moved to the beat perfectly, he was completely mesmerized by your dancing. Once you were done you smiled proudly, you had noticed the way Jisung was looking at you and it made you feel all giddy inside. “And you call yourself a dancer?” the mc asked while giving you a sharp stare. Jisungs eyes widened, he didnt even know what came over him when he spoke “No offense but she is the most amazing dancer id ever seen.” Once Jisung realized what he said he glanced over at you and saw you giving him the biggest heart eyes he had ever seen, he put his hand up to his mouth and tried to hide his growing smile

[imaginativemarvel]

Sexual Tension - Bucky Barnes x Reader - Chapter 6

Summary: (Y/N) transfers to a new university only to find out her new teacher is a hot jackass. Heated words are tossed back and forth but it ends up making them gravitate even closer.

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Reader!

Word count: 2.2K

Warning: little different than usual, lots of curse words and lots of fighting but it’s petty cute fights and shows how close they are and how much they love each other, ok?????/?/?/?/?/?/ thanks !!!

A/N: THE LAST CHAPTER DIDNT LET ME TAG HALF OF THE TAGS SO PLEASE CHECK AND SEE IF YOU READ IT !! (:

more notes lol: WAS going to do a horrible angst fic, THEN was going to do a loki soulmate one, NOW IM UPDATING SEXUAL TENSION Also request are open! I’m open to anything as long as it’s not morally wrong but YK I’m open to a lot of things !! (;

Masterlist ♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡

The last thing you expected was spending you day off with your professor. You didn’t necessarily complain about it though, you both completely cancelled any plans for the day and just hung out around your apartment. At first it was fun and games, until you both fought like 5 year olds and almost burned the whole building down.

“I wanted to make us breakfast! I’m not good at this stuff!” Your hands raise in the air for defense against the laughing man across from you.

“You didn’t have to tell me that! I already knew!” He pointed to the pan on the stove before bending over in laughter.

“I’m sorry! This didn’t goes as planned!” You dragged your hands to the side of your head in frustration while eyeing down your now crying guest and burnt eggs. He finally stopped laughing before covering his smile with his hands and pointing at the ‘food’.

“Did you come to that conclusion from the fact that everything was just on fire?”

You had to admit, you were a bit grumpy but maybe it was leftover mood from when he took your whole queen sized bed from you earlier that morning.

“I swear to god James if you don’t give me at least 5% of my bed, I’m making you sleep on the floor!” Half of your body was falling off the bed, if it weren’t for his grip on your waist, you’d be on the cold hard ground.

“Just make me your mattress, babe.” His arms pulled you to the point where your whole body was laying on top of his, and he wasn’t the definition of comfortable, or at least not in the position.

“FOR FUCKS SAKES JAMES!”

You had to admit, you have no idea what put you both in such a childish mood. It may have made the day funnier but overall it was you both just bickering over stupid, petty things like an old couple on a hot summer day.

“I thought you said you were going to do the dishes for me.” Your arms rested on your hips as you focused your gaze at the man. He didn’t move an inch, he was too fixated on playing the video game you offered him an hour earlier.

“I thought you said that since I’m your guest you would do them?” His eyes didn’t leave the screen, he was too busy trying to win the round.

“Well, you fucking thought wrong, pretty boy.” A smile played on your lips as you threw the towel at his head, covering his eyes and making him lose.

“Seriously?? I would have won the trophy!”

Although it was funny to see him whine and do your chores, the aftermath was horrible. You hated it and boy did he enjoy ever second of it.

“How dare you do that to me!” You dramatically tossed the controller onto the group before ripping the blanket off of Bucky and pulling it over your head in despair.

“It’s a game, (Y/N), besides you made me lose not even 30 minutes ago by tossing a dirty rag in my face.” You felt his arms tug the thick blanket surrounding you but you wouldn’t budge. You refused to move until he apologized for doing something so horrible to you.

“It’s not just a game! You hit me with a red shell as soon as I was going to cross the finish line! I would have been first! It’s not fair!” Your knees touched your chest as you complained in a kid-like fashion.

“Aw come here, let me comfort you.” His arms found your hips hidden beneath the covers before lifting your body and pulling you into his lap.

“Not until you say sorry!” His hands found the opening of the blanket and tugged on it until he found your face. Your head poked out in disgust before crawling back to the other side of the couch.

“Jesus Christ, (Y/N). It’s Mario Kart. Also are you going to completely avoid the fact that there were 4 rounds and you beat me in every round but the last one because I hit you with that shell? Overall you still won!” He was laughing as he tried to pull you back towards him by your feet.

“Say sorry!”

The asshole never said sorry. Yeah, so what if you won, but 4-0 is so much better than 3-1. You weren’t going to let him have it. So what did you do? Tried your best to annoy him.

“Can you please stop!” His hands were holding his head. He was trying to read this forum for his job while it was silent in the room, but you wouldn’t let him have it. Well, not until he apologize to you. You stopped for a moment before staring at him with a smirk, taking a sip from the straw in your drink.

He smiled in a sigh of relief from the silence you gave him. "Thank you!”

“99 bottles of beer on the wall! 99 bottles of beer! Take one down, pass it around! 98 bottles of beer on the wall!” Off-key, man was your tone so off-key, but who cared? Well, clearly he did. That’s really all you needed though. While singing the song loudly, a smile played on your lips.

”(Y/N)!“ After that whole fiasco, it led you and him to your currently clingy and youthful mood. It was a silent hour of just cuddling on your couch with legs intertwined. You both were scrolling down multiple social media pages on your cellular devices without speaking a word. The silence eventually killed him, so he tried to start a civil conversation. Of course, it turned out to be just another stupid arguement.

"Did you watch the news today?” His face was inches from yours, his hot breath hitting your lips. The side of your mouth tugged up, giving him a smirk.

“Was it about you apologizing for cheating in Mario kart?” You shifted your body, wrapping your arms around his neck and pulling him closer.

“No, I didn’t even chea-“ Small wrinkles formed as he furrowed his eyebrows in confusion and defense.

“Then I don’t care, go fuck yourself.” Letting go of your close hold on him, only to ignore whatever he was saying to continue scrolling over old photos on Facebook.

His hand snatched the device from your hand and stared at the thing that was taking your attention away from him. He made a face of anger, confusion and a pinch of jealousy. It was a photo of you and a guy, he seemed around the same age as you. Dark brown hair, green eyes and gripping hands around your waist. You both were smiling to your hearts content with arms linking around each other.

“Who the fuck is he?” His wrist turned, allowing you to see the familiar photo.

“Oh god, James. You sure will be the death of me.” You grabbed the phone and clicked the tag on the 'mysterious’ man in the photo, his profile soon popped up. “Scott Lang, he’s my cousin.”

“Sure he is!” His arm slide under your back before pulling you closer to him in a dominant and overprotective way. “I know how you have a thing for men who are tall, with dark hair and light eyes!”

“Bloody hell, James. That’s my cousin! You know what, to prove it to you, I’ll call him right now!” You exited out of Facebook before clicking your contacts and typing in his name.

“How will I know if it’s actually him?”

“Dude, I’ll let you see the contact photo and name.”

“Don’t you dude me.” You rolled your eyes before clicking Scotts contact and practically shoving the device in his face.

“Look, look. Scott Lang. Cousin! And….. dialing!”

While the phone started to ring, you hit speaker and lifted it between you and Bucky so he could hear the conversation. It rung a few more times before a click was heard and a familiar voice came through.

“(Y/N)?”

“Hey Scotty!” A huge smile was spread onto your face as you heard the voice of your favorite cousin.

“Oh hey, (Y/N). Wow, I haven’t talked to you in ages! Sure is reassuring to hear your voice.”

“Yeah, I was thinking the same thing! I was just wanting to ask a quick question!”

“Oh yeah? Ask away.” Scott was always so open to things, that’s why you loved him so much.

“We’re first cousins, right? Like my mom and your dad are siblings, right?” A giggle escaped your lips before you quickly covered your mouth with a hand.

“Uh…. yeah? Did you forget or something?” The confusion in his voice was noticeable, and man did you find that hilarious.

“Oh no, I was just looking at old photos and someone happened to see the photo of us two and claimed you were my boyfriend, or significant other or something.”

“Oh, yikes. No, we’re cousins, if that… person is listening.” His award tone rung through the phone, you sure did miss how awkward he is.

“Oh he is, thanks Scotty! By the way, we gotta meet up soon. I miss you a lot, bud. Talk to you later?”

The call soon ended with small goodbyes. You lifted yourself from the couch before eyeing down the embarrassed James. You took your leg and placed it over his body and straddled him.

“Men who are tall, with dark hair and light eyes, huh? I’ll give you that. I’m a sucker for anything, though.” The same smirk from before was visible on your lips, you leaned your body down to where your faces were centimeters apart.

“Don’t act like I don’t know what type of men you like, just compare the similarities between me and Jacob Mcevoy and you’ll have it all down. I don’t know why but you act like every man with those characteristics are gods most beautiful creations.”

“James McAvoy. It’s not that hard you know? But… do you want to know what’s truly beautiful?” You poked your finger against his chest as he let out a small chuckle. His hands lifted to your sides before slowly caressing your skin and settling at your hips.

“Oh lord, don’t be cheesy and say it’s me.” He gave you a cheeky smile while a tint of pink rises to his face.

“Good because was going to say Tom Hiddleston. Tall, oh boy is he tall. Dark-ish hair, depends on what movie your watching, and his beautiful blue eyes. What I’d give just to be in the same room as that man.” You dramatically sat up and set your hands on his chest lightly. Your eyes were wide with a sparkling sensation, obviously trying to tick off the man beneath you. His whole smile dropped, you could feel his irritation radiate off his skin.

“At this point I should just go talk to myself in the mirror instead of talking to you, it’s the only way I can have a intelligent conversation, I mean clearly I’m more attracted than Jacob Mcevoy or Ron Littleston.”

“Littleston is probably the most ironic name you could give him.” You chuckled at your own little innuendo before continuing. “And go ahead, I don’t care what you think!”

“Oh really?” The grip on your waist was still there and getting harder by the second. Within seconds he pulled you back down to his body with a playful look.

“Yeah, I find it hard to relate with people who pronounce the 'g’ in lasagna.”

'Easy.’ You thought to yourself.

“Um, excuse me. Aren’t you the one who pronounces bologna like buh-log-nuh?”

'Damnit! Never mind.’ You thought giggling to yourself, overlooking this whole situation and seeing how dumb you both were. It’s like you guys were made for each other.

“Touché!”

“So we’re even, right?” “Mhmm”

Your face found its way to the crook of his neck while you let out the approving hum. His hands ran up to the top of your back and to the bottom while your hands massaged his scalp by playing with his hair.

“Good, because I may or may not have been invited to a family dinner in a few days and I’m bringing you as my date so they’ll stop bugging me about Dolores.” You lifted your head before staring into his eyes.

“Aw! Are you, James Buchanan Barnes, asking me out?”

“You know what? I’ll take it back! I’m sure Dolores would love to come with me.” He began to sit up and lifted you off of him, before he had the chance you pushed him back down and sat in the same position as before.

“There is no way in hell I’d let you go with Dolores, I’d feel too bad!” His hands found his way back to your bottom and back.

“So, you’ll go with me right? You’ll have to dress up all fancy, if you don’t have anything like that I can buy you something.” His tone went from joking to serious, you knew your best option was to go with him. You were always there for him, you would always support him. If that meant possibly embarrassing yourself in front of his entire family; then so be it. If you’re going to be an embarrassing mess then you’ll be his embarrassing mess.

“No. I have this dress I got for my last birthday that’ll work. So yeah, I’ll go. Anything for you, James.” Your comment made his teeth shine. You couldn’t help it, as much as you both fought and bickered, you loved him too much. You’d never want to put him in harms way.

“Thank you, (Y/N).”

♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡ Sexual Tension Tags- @dinorapreira @mariah-notcarey17 @irepeldirt @lloeppky @buckybisexualbarnesofthe107th @modestlyconfused @g0back2bed @grunge-crybabies @crybabyscum @misscherryberry @httperrornicole @astronominalfarts @ktrivia @socialheartbreak @softwhispers @catbunbun @mmauricee @learisa @21hamstreet @evakhlr @ginger-wayward-assbutt @peachyhoneyy @bellastellaluna @crazy4thewinbros @satans-knitting-club @curlyexpat @bunnymother93 @thewinterbro @marvel-fanfiction @walkingtravesty97 @brokenanxiety @jessevans - [DID I FORGET YOU? Let me know! Want to be tagged? Let me know! Crossed off names are ones that Tumblr didn’t let me tag!]

[chickenfetus]

ALL!!!! (also the gemini sqUAD LOL)

im gonna enjoy a nice cup of water while doing this bc idk a tea (update i didnt drink water at all and now im dying of thirst,, also undercut bc many)

1: Golden mornings or peachy sunsets?

i dont wake up early enough to see the sunrise and when i do i never manage to take pics bc of school so peachy sunsets

2: Sugar cones or waffle cones?

idk what a sugar cone is but i like waffle cones!!! havent eaten ice cream with a cone in forever though,, i rarely eat ice cream now

3: Do you wear scarves often? do you have a favorite?

listen…. its about 33 degrees everyday but even if im in a colder country i dont wear scarves

4: How long do you lay in bed before you finally get up?

this depends?? on how motivated im feeling lmao never more than 10 minutes though because if i lay awake for that long ill just fall back asleep

5: Is there a food you’ve never had but always wanted to try?

i dont think so?? im bad at trying new things especially food

6: What does your umbrella look like?

i dont.. go outside often and whenever i do i take public transport so basically everythings sheltered so i never had a need for umbrellas

7: Do you listen to ASMR?

ive only listened to one everybody please listen to this gift

8: Rain storms or a light drizzle?

both, preferably when im indoors

9: What’s a little thing in life that you love?

hm??????????? my tags lmao 

UPDATE: i also really like reading other people’s tags and their rambles that is all

10: Favorite color aesthetic?

does the word aesthetic make this question any different from a normal favourite colour question???? if it doesnt then sky blue 

11: Wobbly lines or using a ruler?

in this house we draw lines with no ruler like men (but also because even if i did use a ruler it wouldnt be like… straight idk i cant use rulers

12:  Bright colorful living room or neutral cozy living room?

neutral cozy living room but i also love basking in sunlight 

13: Do you have any candles? what scents are they?

im not a big fan of heavy smelling products so i dont own any candles

14: Have you ever rode a horse?

i dont think so??????? ive seen horses before though

15: Do you have glasses?

without my glasses i wouldnt be able to read these questions lmao and . .. theyre also a result of watching pokemon too closely to the tv at a young age… its been like 10 years since i got glasses

16: What’s a language you’d like to speak?

japanese i tried speaking it but i got 2 embarrassed to say anything properly while i was in japan (i cant even speak english properly to a friend whyd i think i could speak another language to a stranger beats me) 

17: What’s your favorite season and favorite month in that season?

my singaporean no season ass: ? but autumn and november (is this cutting it too close to winter? idk my seasons)

18: Do you have a favorite pair of socks?

hm not really i just wear blue ankle socks a lot but my friend did give me a pair of pokemon and gudetama socks before and i adore those although i lost the gudetama ones in the uk last year she got me another pair whatd i do to deserve her?

19: Favorite Ghibli and/or disney movie

m .. um? big. hero 6?????? 

20: Disney, Dreamworks, or Pixar?

my dumb ass didnt know they were different

21: What snacks do you usually get at the theater?

i rarely go and watch movies anymore but when i did watch a lot of movies with my friend at the theater we’d get afternoon shows and sneak mcdonalds in lmao

22: What’s an underrated video game/ movie/ show you love and think it needs more recognition?

how about band? day6 i only ever play pokemon + sif + bandori so i cant say much and i rarely watch movies and a show? if its an anime id say the one i mentioned before in my one text post 

23: Would you fill your house with plants if you had a green thumb?

not really rip 

24; All plants are great but do you have a favorite?

HM mmmmmm there was this one but i forgot the name lmao pass

25: Do you have a favorite type of art style? (eg: soft looking, no to little color, sketches, crisp and clean, minimalist, pixel art etc.)

when im the … audience? what do u call it???? i like seeing all kinda of art styles!!! everyone has their own unique art style and i love it all :o

for ME,, , ive been doing art for 6 years maybe and i still cant do shit

26: What would you do if someone gave you flowers?

i would die straight up die thats such a soft concept i cant imagine myself receiving flowers thats 2 sweet oh my god wtf id combust??? i prefer leaves though is that weird i picked some nice leaves recently and im gonna give those to my friends

27: Do you like nicknames?

giving and having nicknames is my favorite past time

28: Do you still watch shows you watched when you were a kid? even from time to time?

pokemon lmao thank u 4 not ending it…. the animation has only improved and im so proud to have been watching it since the start pokemon is my special thing i love it so much!! an interest that never died down, with an anime that stays super like idk to my preference? i tried watching the new digimon stuff but i just couldnt :^( im glad they made ash stay the main character 

29: Do you still like old memes? (tell the truth)

never forget dat boi

30: Favorite Halloween costume you dressed up as? (if you don’t celebrate halloween have you ever cosplayed or would you like to? who did you cosplay as?)

we dont celebrate halloween and i would never cosplay, big shoutout to cosplayers though!!! they put in so much effort and just, respect!!!!! 

i dont know if this is an actual memory because i dont remember well but when i was younger i thiNK? i had to dress up as a swan thing i have no clue i dont even remember the performance but i might have had to ?? and dance??? or act i dont remember everythings fuzzy but i dressed up a swan once? in kindergarten ????? 

31:  Are you a fashionable person?

i have the worst fashion sense and even though jeans are nice once again the weather here doesnt allow me to be as fashionable as i can be

32: Do you like watching holiday movies?

not realyyy??? the jack frost (rip) movie was ncie????

33:  Cookies or brownies?

i live 4 chocolate chip cookies but too much is . . not preferable

34: Do you blow in the cold air just to see your breath?

no i hate breathing in & out from my mouth

35: Do you find the crickets chirping outside your window relaxing?

WELL from the great cockroach ordeal last night id probably die bc we live in an apartment building so the only way id be hearing crickets would be if they were in the ROOM 

36: Do you like cobblestone streets?

my only knowledge of cobblestone is from minecraft so idk

37:  How often do you doodle?

when school was still relevant i would doodle as soon as i picked up a pencil lmao i try not to anymore bc i doodled on my math assignment and forgot to fucking erase it and my math teacher called me out

38: When was the last time you blew bubbles?

a year ago?? i dont remember but i do remember when i was younger id try and blow bubbles at the void deck do yall kno what that is its just a space near the lift lobby anyway i swallowed the soap thing idk u know how ur supposed to blow? well i sucked the soap in yum

39: What’s your favorite random piece of decor in your house and room?

in my room its the bed and in the house its the water bottle that contains water

40: Do you bite your fingernails off or clip them more often?

i………………………… i dont actualy kno how to clip my nails and my mum would kill me if i tried but i dont bite my nails either

41: Any birthmarks?

not that i know of

42: Thoughts on freckles?

ive never actually seen someone with freckles in public before but theyre good stuff i gueess?? i dont actually have an opinion on them? everyone says theyre cute and all but im just ??? not that i hate freckles tho if u have freckles? thats cool! 

43: First video game you ever played?

pokemon pearl?? either that or megaman on my ps3 OR the bomb square guy????? idk the game name but.. ya

44: what type of bird do you hear most often outside your door?

i dont know what the bird species are but theyre small black birds not crows idk

45: Do you use gifs/ memes a lot when replying to people?

memes yes gifs no bc im not lame like jen

46: Thoughts on spring?

no comment?? i mean? its nice??????? i guess ??? if we had a spring

47: Ideal temperature outside?

oh boy 20 degrees would be enough for me but its never gotten that low before sunny island’s life

48: Cloudy, partly cloudy, or clear skies?

i like clear skies when its bright! but not too sunny and not too warm!!!!! clouds are nice to look at too though

49: How often do you hear airplanes outside?

yeah we live near an airport i dont think anybody uses????

50: Do you enjoy windy days?

windy days are my SHIT back in school our basketball court was open spaced and whenevr wind blew we could feel it man thats the life right there but i hate windy days when im sitting at home bc it flows the curtains rigth into my face i like the feel of the wind and the smell of fresh air but… curtains in my face? not 2 great so rip i close all the windows lmao

okay thank u so much 4 asking falen i love you and wow this was a lot

[oldblogpinklimes]

Mother’s Day

Since I can’t draw today for some reason, here is one of those rare moments were I actually write something. Enjoy!

Damian is holding Liam’s hand, always cold but he likes it that way. They walking on a path through a forest. Its a lovely day, with the sun bright and the air feeling fresher than before. Damian is happy that a day like this feels so wonderful and everything in this woods look so beautiful. As much as it was a pleasant sight, his heart felt heavy as they got closer to their location. At least, Damian wasn’t alone this time, he has Liam with him. Even so, just thinking made him feel as if it was his fault, is his fault. He could tried better, he could of unfroze his mind and actually do something to stop it. He could of- “Damian, are you ok?” Liam asked. Damian shake his head and gave a small smile to Liam, squeezing his small hand. “Sorry, got lost in thought for a second.” “I’m here, you aren’t alone this time”, Liam said reassuringly, rubs the back of Damian’s hand, “Are you ready?” “Yes” He said in a shaky breath. He closed his eye and breathed deeply, opening it again.

I’m coming, Mom.

Damian and Liam kept walking until they saw flowers. Many flowers of different colors and shapes. Good thing it still revealed enough sunlight and rain to keep the flowers beautiful. There was a tombstone, with a photo and a candles around it. “Maria ‘Mary’ Cath-Rosa. Born 1964, Died 2008. Mother and wife, to which your life will never be forgotten.” Damian read, looking down on the grave.

He slowly kneels down, having his hands on his legs. Liam kneels too, looking sadly to Damian. His face was blank, in a distant thought. As much as Liam was always afraid to ask him about it, he wanted to know what happened. It might not be the best moment to ask him, but its never the best moment, he guessed. 

He grabs Damian’s hand and keeps rubbing the back of the palm. He dared and asked “How did your mother died? I know you don’t like talking about it, but I’m interested to know.” 

Damian looked at him with a sad eye then back at the grave. He gave out a sigh, trying to mentally prepare himself, even if he knows it will fail.

“Remember when I told you I met this old lady at a McDonalds once and she made hilarious puns? Well, that old lady was my mother. I was still homeless when I was 22, just trying my best to survive in the cold of December. I didnt have a lot of money and the only thing I could buy were some sad fries. The lady in the line was generous to buy me food and it was very kind of her, then we sat down to talk. We talked for a long time, it was strange that she was being very kind to me. At random moment, she said my name, when I havent even told her what my name was. She told me she was my mom and obviously at first, I didnt believe it. I was raised in an orphanage and I was always told all my life that my parents left for being a freak of nature. She said she and my dad have been looking for me for years, ever since I was taken away from them.” 

Damian grabs the photo, a picture of a tall blond man with green eyes and a small woman with black hair, brown light skin and hazel eyes. They were holding a small baby with a hazel eyes and pink hair. They look very happy. Damian smiles at the picture, his eye getting watery.

“I was going to live with her, get to know my mom better and she was going to help me. I finally had a family, even if it was just her. I could finally know where I came from and everything. Until...” He puts the photo down and he sniffles, one tear falling. “Some men grabbed us and took us to this obscure place. They told us they worked for the government and they been watching me for days now. They were going to make experiments on me and on my mother, to figure out what I really was. They made surgeries on me, opening my stomach to see my insides and opening my chest were my heart is. Made me do this mental tests, exercises from hell and endurance tests, involving from using tasers and more. They checked her DNA, asked her many questions if she had powers or if she did some kind of deal with someone, but she said to all of them no. I wasn’t allowed to even see her and she was forced to see me suffer all those things until she spilled out all she knew about my whole being. Like her, I was clueless too. I dont know how long we were there, but felt like hell...”

Damian looks at his hands, shaking. The memories were flowing hard, from the sound of gunshots to her voice. His eye started glowing bright in anger and hatred of that day.

“I tried to escape, Liam. I tried to fucking escape and I couldn’t. I was so close on doing it and if it wasn’t for me being impatient, she would of been alive with us. She would still be with us and not fucking dead because of me. I calculated everything, every single moment of a guard making its rounds and mapping the place and fucking everything. I was this fucking close. We could of escaped, we could of fucking escape and... I couldn’t save her, Liam.” Tears come down like a river, hugging himself for the unbearable pain he was feeling in his heart and on his left eye.

Liam frowns and hugs Damian, receiving a hug back. Damian sobs, as he continues. “She was on my arms, Liam. I was holding her and protecting her close to me and they snatched her off from me and pined me down. They made me watch as they called her ‘The witch that gave birth to a monster.’ I can still remember her words, saying to be good and to never forget who I was. She was still worried about me, even when she was about to die in front of me, even when she tried to reassure that things were going to be ok, knowing it wasn’t going to be. They shot her, in the head and her blood was on me. It was on me, Liam, those fuckers didn’t give two shit about it.” Damian said with a cracking voice, sobbing on his boyfriend’s shoulder. Liam started tearing a bit and hugged Damian very close. 

They were like this for an hour, Liam reassuring and letting Damian sob all he wanted, letting those deep feelings out. After Damian was done, Damian separate himself from Liam and cleaned his eye. He whines a bit, his left eye giving him a lot of pain. Liam took out Damian’s bottle of pills, taking out two tablets. Damian grabs them and shallows, hoping the pain will subside. Liam rubs his back and leans to his shoulder, still reassuring. Damian sniffs and closes his eye. He sighs, breathing a slight bit. Liam thinks a bit, now hooking his arm around Damian’s. “Your mom would be very proud of you”, he said, “for becoming a better man, a better person. She believed in you, even if she didn’t knew her own son well. She was a good woman.”

Damian opens his eye and looks at Liam, then back at the grave. Damian would be very happy to believe that. 

“Yeah...”

Damian stands out and grabs a few flowers, the white ones. He puts them on top of the grave. He helps Liam stand up and he hugs him, still looking at the grave.

“Even if I cant see the place we are, you chose a nice place for her to rest, Damian. Its quiet and peaceful, its really nice.”  Liam said.

“Yeah, a nice place for her to rest.” He said. 

He looks down at Liam. “Do you want to eat some ice cream?”

Liam smiled widely and nods. “Yeah, lets go eat some ice cream.”

Damian looks at the grave and smiles.

“Happy Mother’s Day, Mom.”

Both start walking away from the grave. As the grave is now off their view, a green soul with a white center appears and takes on a spirit form. A small woman, on her early 40s, smiling with a soft look in her eyes. Tears come out of her eyes and puts her hands to her heart.

She said, in a soft voice.

“I’ll always be proud of you, Damian. Thank you.”

[allofbeercom]

After the Circus by Patrick Modiano – extract

Read an exclusive extract from the Nobel prize winners mysterious, romantic classic set on Parisian streets filled with dreamy unease and quiet menace now available to English readers in a new translation by Mark Polizzotti

I was eighteen, and the man whose face I dont recall was typing up my legal status, address, and supposed student enrollment as fast as I could state them. He asked how I spent my free time.

I paused for a few seconds.

I go to movies and bookstores.

You dont just go to movies and bookstores.

He cited the name of a café. No matter how often I repeated that Id never set foot in the place, I could tell he didnt believe me. Finally, he contented himself with typing the following:

I go to movies and bookstores. I have never been to the Café de la Tournelle, at number 61 on the quay of that name.

Then more questions about my activities and my parents. Yes, I took literature courses at the university. There was no danger in telling him that lie: I really had enrolled in the program, but only to prolong my draft deferment. As for my parents, they were both abroad and I had no idea when theyd return, if ever.

Then he mentioned the names of a man and a woman and asked if I knew them. I answered no. He told me to think very carefully. If I didnt tell the truth, there could be serious consequences. The threat was delivered in a calm, indifferent voice. No, really, I didnt know those two individuals. He typed my answer, then handed me the sheet, at the bottom of which was written: Seen and agreed to. I didnt bother looking over my deposition and signed with a ballpoint pen that was lying on the desk.

Before leaving, I asked why Id had to submit to that interrogation.

Your name was in someones address book.

But he didnt say who that someone was.

Well be in touch if we need you again.

He saw me to the door of his office. In the hallway, on the leather bench, sat a girl of about twenty-two.

Youre next, he said to the girl.

She stood up. We exchanged glances. Through the door that hed left ajar, I saw her sit down in the same chair that Id occupied a moment earlier.

* * *

I found myself back on the quay. It was around five in the afternoon. I walked toward the Pont Saint-Michel, thinking that I might wait for the girl to come out after her interrogation. But I couldnt just loiter about police head-quarters. I decided to bide my time in the café on the corner of Boulevard du Palais, where it meets the quay. And what if she had gone in the opposite direction, toward the Pont-Neuf ? The thought never occurred to me.

I was seated near the window, my eyes fixed on the Quai des Orfèvres. Her interrogation lasted much longer than mine. Night had already fallen when I saw her walking toward the café.

As she was passing by, I tapped on the window with the back of my hand. She looked at me in surprise, then came inside to join me.

She sat down at my table as if we knew each other and had made a date. She was the first to speak.

Did they ask you a lot of questions?

My name was in someones address book.

Do you know who?

They wouldnt tell me. But maybe you can shed some light.

She knitted her brow.

Shed light on what?

I figured your name must have been in that address book, too, and they were questioning you about the same thing.

No. With me, it was just to give evidence.

She seemed preoccupied. It felt like she was slowly forgetting I was there. I kept silent. Then she smiled. She asked how old I was. I said twenty-one, making myself three years older: legal age, at the time.

Do you have a job?

I deal in used books, I said randomly, in a tone I tried to make convincing.

She looked at my face, no doubt wondering if she could trust me.

Will you do me a favor? she asked.

* * *

At Place du Châtelet, she wanted to take the metro. It was rush hour. We stood squeezed together near the doors. At every station, the riders getting off pushed us onto the platform. Then we got back on with the new passengers. She leaned her head on my shoulder and said with a smile that no one could find us in this crowd.

At the Gare du Nord metro stop, we were carried along in the flood of travelers heading for the commuter trains. We crossed through the train station lobby, and in the checkroom she opened a locker and pulled out a black leather suitcase.

I carried the suitcase, which was rather heavy. It occurred to me that it contained more than just clothes. The metro again, same line but in the opposite direction. This time we found seats. We got off at Cité.

At the end of the Pont-Neuf, we waited for the light to turn red. I was feeling increasingly anxious. I wondered how Grabley would greet us when we arrived at the apartment. Shouldnt I tell her about Grabley, so that his presence there wouldnt catch her off guard?

We walked past the Hôtel des Monnaies. I heard the clock on the Institut de France chime nine p.m.

Are you sure no one will mind if I come to your place? she asked.

Nope. No one.

There were no lights in the apartment windows facing the quay. Had Grabley gone to his room, on the courtyard side? Normally he parked his car in the middle of the little square that forms a recess between the Hôtel des Monnaies and the Institut, but it wasnt there.

I opened the door on the fourth floor and we walked through the foyer. We entered the room that had served as my fathers office. Light fell from a naked bulb dangling from the ceiling. No furniture left, except for an old couch with dark red leaf patterns.

I set the suitcase down next to the couch. She went to the window.

You have a nice view . . .

To the left was one end of the Pont des Arts and the Louvre. Directly in front, the tip of Ile de la Cité and the small Vert-Galant park.

We sat on the couch. She looked around her and seemed amazed by the sparseness of the room.

Are you moving out?

I told her that, unfortunately, we had to vacate the premises in a month. My father had gone to Switzerland to live out his days.

Why Switzerland?

It really was too long a story for that evening. I shrugged. Grabley would be back any minute. How would he react when he saw the girl and her suitcase? I was afraid he would call my father in Switzerland, and that the latter, in a last gasp of parental dignity, would try to play the noble paterfamilias, lecture me about my studies and endangered future. But he was wasting his time.

Im tired . . .

I suggested she lie down on the couch. She hadnt removed her raincoat. I remembered that the heating no longer worked.

Are you hungry? I can go get something from the kitchen . . .

She sat on the couch, legs folded under her, resting on her heels.

Dont go to any trouble. Maybe just something to drink . . .

The light in the foyer had gone off. The bow window in the wide front hall leading to the kitchen lit the room with pale glimmers, as if there were a full moon out. Grabley had left the light on in the kitchen. In front of the old dumbwaiter stood an ironing board on which I recognized the trousers of his glen plaid suit. He ironed his own shirts and other clothes. On the folding table, where I sometimes took my meals with him, was an empty yogurt jar, a banana peel, and a packet of instant coffee. He must have eaten in. I found two yogurts, a slice of salmon, some fruit, and a bottle of whiskey three-quarters empty. When I returned, she was reading one of the magazines that Grabley had let pile up for several weeks on the office mantelpiece, risqué periodicals, as he called them, for which he had a great fondness.

I set the tray down in front of us, on the floor.

She had left the magazine open next to her and I could make out the black-and-white photo of a naked woman, seen from behind, hair tied in a ponytail, left leg extended, right leg bent, her knee resting on a mattress.

Interesting reading matter youve got . . .

No, those arent mine . . . They belong to a friend of my fathers.

She bit into an apple and poured herself some whiskey.

What have you got in that suitcase? I asked.

Oh, nothing much . . . Some personal effects . . .

It was heavy. I thought it was stuffed with gold bricks.

She gave me a sheepish smile. She explained that she lived in a house not far from Paris, near Saint-Leu-la-Forêt, but the owners had come back unexpectedly last night. She preferred to leave, as she didnt really get along with them. Tomorrow she would go to a hotel, until she could find a permanent place to live.

You can stay here as long as you like.

I was sure that Grabley, after his initial surprise, would have no objections. As for my father, what he thought no longer mattered.

Are you getting sleepy?

I intended to give her the upstairs bedroom. I would sleep on the office couch.

I led the way, suitcase in hand, up the small inner staircase to the fifth floor. The room was as sparsely furnished as the office. A bed shoved against the back wall. The nightstand and bedside lamp were gone. I switched on the fluorescent lights in the two display cases, on either side of the fireplace, where my father kept his collection of chess pieces, although these had disappeared, along with the small Chinese armoire and the fake Monticelli canvas that had left a discoloration on the sky-blue paneling. I had consigned those three objects to an antiques dealer, a certain DellAversano, for him to sell.

Is this your room? she asked.

Yes.

I had set the suitcase in front of the fireplace. She went to the window, like before, in the office.

If you look all the way to the right, I told her, you can see the statue of Henri IV and the Tour Saint-Jacques.

She gazed distractedly at the rows of books between the two windows. Then she lay down on the bed and removed her shoes with a casual flick of her foot. She asked where I was going to sleep.

Downstairs on the couch.

Stay here, she said. I dont mind.

She had kept on her raincoat. I turned off the lights in the display cases. I lay down next to her.

Doesnt it feel cold to you?

She moved closer and gently rested her head on my shoulder. Lights and shadows shaped like window grates slid across the walls and ceiling.

Whats that? she asked.

The tour boat passing by.

* * *

<img class="gu-image" itemprop="contentUrl" alt="The" cafe aux deux magots in the saint germain district in 1960. the rue de rennes in the background, on the left. FRANCE – JANUARY 01: The cafe AUX DEUX MAGOTS in the Saint Germain district in 1960. The rue de Rennes in the background, on the left. (Photo by Keystone-France/Gamma-Keystone via Getty Images)” src=”https://i.guim.co.uk/img/media/fcfee192d71e0a16e7c185fc0366fd431d4f7db2/0_0_3508_2339/master/3508.jpg?w=300&q=85&auto=format&sharp=10&s=f330ada83013e1a7d2d29fafec406923″/>

Photograph: Gamma-Keystone via Getty Images

I awoke with a start. The front door had slammed.

She was lying against me, nude inside her raincoat. It was seven in the morning. I heard Grableys footsteps. He was making a phone call in the office. His voice grew louder and louder, as if he was arguing with someone. Then he left the office and went into his room.

She woke up as well and asked what time it was. She told me she had to be going. She had left some belongings in the house in Saint-Leu-la-Forêt and wanted to collect them as soon as possible.

I offered her breakfast. There was still some instant coffee in the kitchen and one of the boxes of Choco BN biscuits that Grabley always bought. When I returned to the fifth floor with the tray, she was in the large bathroom. She emerged, dressed in her black skirt and pullover sweater.

She said she would call me early that afternoon. She didnt have any paper on which to jot down my number. I took a book from the shelves and tore out the flyleaf, on which I wrote my name, address, and phone number: DANTON 55-61. She folded the paper in four and shoved it in one of her raincoat pockets. Then her lips brushed mine and she said in a low voice that she was grateful and was looking forward to seeing me again.

She walked along the quay toward the Pont des Arts.

I stood at the window for a few minutes, watching her distant silhouette cross the bridge.

I stashed the suitcase in the storage closet at the top of the stairs. I laid it flat on the floor. It was locked. I lay down again and breathed in her scent from the hollow of one of the pillows. She would eventually tell me why theyd questioned her yesterday afternoon. I tried to recall the names of the two people the detective had mentioned, asking whether I knew them. One of them sounded something like Beaufort or Bousquet. In whose address book had they found my name? Was he just trying to get information about my father? Hed asked which foreign country my father had gone to. I had covered his tracks by answering Belgium.

The week before, I had accompanied my father to the Gare de Lyon. He was wearing his old navy blue overcoat and his only luggage was a leather bag. We were early, and we waited for the Geneva train in the large restaurant on the upper level, from which we overlooked the lobby and railway tracks. Was it the late afternoon light? The golden hue on the ceiling? The chandeliers that shone down on us? My father suddenly seemed old and tired, like someone who has been playing cat and mouse for far too long and is about to give up.

The only book he brought with him for the trip was called The Hunt. He had recommended it to me several times, because the author mentioned our apartment, where hed lived twenty years earlier. What a strange coincidence . . . Hadnt my fathers life, in certain periods, resembled a hunt in which he was the prey? But so far, hed managed to elude his captors.

We were facing each other over our coffee. He was smoking, cigarette dangling from the corner of his lips. He talked about my schooling and my future. As he saw it, it was all well and good to want to write novels, as I intended, but it was safer to earn a few diplomas. I kept quiet, listening to him. Words like diplomas, stable situation, profession sounded odd in his mouth. He pronounced them with respect and a kind of nostalgia. After a while, he fell silent, exhaled a cloud of smoke, and shrugged.

We didnt exchange another word until he climbed onto the train and leaned out the lowered window. I had remained on the platform.

Grabley will live with you in the apartment. Afterward, well make a determination. Youll have to rent someplace else.

But he had said it without any conviction. The train for Geneva lurched forward, and at that moment it felt as if I were seeing that face and that navy blue coat pull away forever.

At around nine oclock, I went down to the fourth floor. I had heard Grableys footsteps. He was sitting on the office couch in his plaid bathrobe. Next to him was a tray carrying a cup of tea and a Choco BN. He hadnt shaved and his features were drawn.

Good morning, Obligado . . .

He called me by that nickname because of a friendly wager wed had. One evening, we had arranged to meet in front of a cinema on Avenue de la Grande-Armée. He had told me to get off at the Obligado metro stop. The stop was really called Argentine, but he refused to believe it. We had made a bet, which Id won.

I only got two hours sleep last night. I made my rounds.

He stroked his blond mustache and squinted.

Same places as usual?

The very ones.

His rounds invariably started at eight oclock at the Café des Deux Magots, where he had an aperitif. Then he crossed over to the Right Bank and stopped at Place Pigalle. He stayed in that neighborhood until dawn.

And what about you, Obligado?

I put a girlfriend up last night.

Does your father know?

No.

You should ask him if its all right. Im sure Ill be getting a call.

He imitated my father when he wanted to appear serious and responsible, but it rang even less true than the original.

And what sort of young lady is she?

His face took on the unctuous expression with which he suggested, every Sunday morning, that I go to Mass with him.

First of all, shes not a young lady.

Is she pretty?

I saw on his face the smug, flattering smile of the traveling salesman in some random station bar who over a beer tells you how he got lucky.

My girlfriend last night wasnt too bad either . . .

His tone became aggressive, as if we were suddenly in competition. I no longer remember what I felt at the time, with that seated man, in the empty office that looked as if it had been vacated at a moments notice, its furniture and paintings pawned or repossessed. He was my fathers stand-in, his factotum. They had met when very young on a beach on the Atlantic coast, and my father had corrupted this petty bourgeois Frenchman. For thirty years, Grabley had lived in his shadow. The only habit he retained from his childhood and good upbringing was to attend Mass every Sunday.

Will you introduce me to your girlfriend?

He gave me a complicit wink.

We could even go out together, if you like . . . Im fond of young couples.

I pictured us, her and me, in Grableys car as it crossed over the Seine and headed toward Pigalle. A young couple. One evening Id accompanied him to the Deux Magots, before he headed off on his usual rounds. We were sitting near the windows. I had been surprised to see him greet in passing a couple of about twenty-five: the woman blonde and very graceful, the man dark and overly elegant. He had even gone to talk to them, standing next to their table, while I watched from my seat. Their age and appearance marked such a sharp contrast with Grableys old-world manners that I wondered what fluke could have brought them together. The man seemed amused by what Grabley was saying, but the woman was more detached. Taking his leave, Grabley had shaken the mans hand and given the woman a ceremonious nod. When we left, he introduced them to me, but Ive forgotten their names. Then hed told me that the young man was a very useful contact and that hed met him during his rounds in Pigalle.

You seem pensive, Obligado . . . Are you in love?

He had gotten up and was standing in front of me, hands in the pockets of his bathrobe.

I need to spend all day at the office. I have to sift through the paperwork from seventy-three and move it out.

That was an office my father had rented on Boulevard Haussmann. I often used to go meet him there at the end of the afternoon. A corner room with a very high ceiling. Daylight entered through four French windows overlooking the boulevard and Rue de lArcade. Filing cabinets against the walls and a massive desk with an assortment of inkwells, blotters, and a writing case.

What did he do there? Each time, I would find him on the telephone. After thirty years, I happened across an envelope, on the back of which was printed the name of an ore refining company, the Société Civile dEtudes et Traitements de Minerais, 73 Boulevard Haussmann, Paris 8.

You and your girlfriend can come pick me up at seventy-three. Well go have dinner together . . .

I dont think shes free this evening.

He seemed disappointed. He lit a cigarette.

Well, anyway, call me at seventy-three to let me know your plans . . . Id love to meet her . . .

I was thinking I had to keep a bit of distance, or else wed have him on our backs nonstop. But Ive never been very good at saying no.

This is an extract from After the Circus by Patrick Modiano, published on 21 January by Yale University Press at £10.99. Visit the Guardian Bookshop to preorder it for £8.79.

from All Of Beer http://allofbeer.com/after-the-circus-by-patrick-modiano-extract/

[ayatanskywalker4u]

NO ONE CAN BLAME YOU FOR WALKING AWAY

Does the story end when we go? Does love die if the pages stop turning? I hope so because Im in pain. How do u tell someone "you cheated 1st"? I slept with two women and the other I still love. I read her tumblr page when she wasnt looking, its not like i was the greatest guy. She said stuff like i said mean things. I know i did. Like a kid throwing a tantrum because i dreamed of a future. You know, having kids a house, maybe a dog. If i didnt love her why risk going to jail to save her life? Her father threatened to call the cops on me when i banged on the door yelling and crying shouting "SHES DYING" it was raining that night like some movie and me running through it. We were always there for eachother whether it was a prayer or a hand. I asked her to marry me and she said yes, that was somewhere in the middle.

Theres a lot that happened, some NSFW stuff that happened to her. I could see it breaking her. And when we finally met again she was laughing about some of the graphic content. She told me the old her was dead, like she was just looking past me. Like the night she was dying from an overdose. She didnt see the man that loves her. She only saw what she wanted to see.

When the ambulance took her away i met her the next day in the hospital ward. I will always remember this because as i turned away from her hand i felt her standing there almost begging me not to leave. I had to go, i joined the military.

What went through my mind during that moment was does she love me, then why didnt she call me before the pills? And she's slept with other men to boot. But i was always there even if it made me mad.

There was this other girl, Ebony. She was pretty but so was Ashley. I wanted to try getting back at her for running around. And no i didnt go to bed with Ebony after Ashley's incident. Not right after. I still shouldnt have. "He who touches a women divored commiteth adultery." The same goes for man. I sinned against my very heart which was Ashley and now she hates me.

Im not the type to go get a new dog when we have to put down o'l yeller. When my dog Ginger died i never replaced her. Can you replace a son or a daughter, a father or mother? Can you replace the person you almost lost your life for? I guess the question is should you though. I hate sounding like im giving up on what i believe in. I love ginger and i believe in a better place.

I stayed gone to military training until 2010. Ashley called in the beginning to see if i was alright. I was still mad at her. Was she sleeping with others even though i wasnt around even Ebony? Lol no but ebony was sleeping against me and Ashley even stalked her to find out for me. I thought she was manipulating my emotions. That was the beginning of our downfall. I called her, Ashley, right around my graduation. I was outside of a hotel the privates threw a party at. I missed her and decided to go outside and call her. She was with some other man sadly. Probably doing some NSFW with him as my heart breaks. She laughed at me over the phone, like hey Ash come on its OB. Im still here. I graduated but the woman i love left me.

After the military i called her every now and again. She wouldnt pick up most of the time. I joined the conservation corps and just decided to wait until she asked me to come over. My heart was racing when she asked to talk, funny enough i believe i quit there right beforehand.

We talked about a lot of stuff. Mainly she talked about the guy and the NSFW stuff. All while looking off in the distance just smiling and giggling about how he made her scream and broke the cheap Walmart bed. I was getting upset. Holding my tongue. But when she told me her father touched her, thats when i cracked. I laughed at her pain because it seemed like she was ignoring mine. I missed her forever and a day and she was just, idk she was something, a happy i wouldnt call happy. I spent the night i think, even tried to pull a night with her but its like she just hated me. The last time i recalled ever seeing her was the hospital. She must have held the hospital and ebony against me.

Fast forward to the next day she drops me off at my house. As i stare at her wondering whats going on in her head, probably the dudes equipment, she reaches out and tries to hug me. I pushed her hands away, like she just wanted me to feel like everything was going to be alright. She only wanted to chase tail. Like all those moments over the years we were together didnt matter. I know she was talkin to someone else, i felt like i couldnt "satisfy" her anymore in a way. She definitely didnt like my moves the night before. I watched her get back in the car and drive off.

Some years passed and we lost the house. I overdosed on i think excedrin. That was the night she wouldnt pick up her phone. Funny enough that bottle wasnt enough to finish the job. The cycle of wanting to die when you lose a love like a dog, pig, cow, man women, whatever its hard to kill unless you have hope.

I gathered my senses and decided to leave california for Minnesota. The week prior was bad though. I started hallucinating and i heard voices. I started developing schizophrenia, and destroyed my mothers house due to it. Back to the following week im leaving for Minnesota and Tony tells me he has a gun he wants to sell. I figure i'd buy it when i get paid. You guessed it, im looking to make the job quick. Ashley didnt love me anymore. She wont miss me anyways. I Know how to pull an M9 apart blind folded and put it back together within seconds. I know the central nervous system is what you aim for. Its in the back of the skull at the nape of the neck. You'd leave this world in seconds. I know it sounds grim but come on, its better than commiting adultery against my heart. Who wants to live and suffer at the same time?

Tony saw me brandishing the piece and hid it from me i was crying about what i had done to everyone.

Tony ended up ditching me in Minnesota, luckily it wasnt my first time eating out of a trash can. Home is where you make it. Some people at the shelter became my friends and we played guitars together. But i wasnt as good with the guitar as i am now.

Salvation army was my first job in Minnesota, i was just happy again. I grew my hair out and styled it down, not like Prince and less greasy. After work id go get a drink. I worked that job for about two months i know because my birthday had passed and i believe i turned 25.

2015 came down and i still was asking god what now. I was skinny and handsome playing the guitar with a job. There were women who'd look and stare and some thought i was full of myself. The truth is i just wanted to be able to hold ashley if she ever fell in my arms. I was kinda muscly. I always told myself that one day her legs will fail but id be ready, the muscles werent just for show.

I hit on a few women but i never chased. Id go to the library every now and again to read. And then it hit me, even though i had no cell phone i could use the computers, Ashley was the 1st thing on my mind. I called, i dont think she answered but messaged back. She sounded angry. She was pregnant is what she was. Little did i know. All said and done she left me feeling more empty than i had planned. I started getting angry at God, "if you control everything and move everything, why are you moving me toward Ashley? She doesnt even see the love anymore or remember the sacrifices."

The train to the mall was coming by soon. I went to the liquor store with a plan. Buy as much fireball whiskey as i can consume and jump off of the mall of america. The train was sluggish, probably because i had been drinking. I fell into a doze just before the last stop, "The Mall of America". I woke up and walked slowly, tipsy, toward the elevators to the 6th floor. I heard a voices as i walked to the ledge. I turned around to see if anyone was watching me, my back against the guard rail. I climbed on top and looked down, liquor really did help. I turned my head up and told God "you want my life? You can have it". I let go of my hands back toward the earth and fell asleep.

When i woke up it was about 2 weeks later. My vision was blurry but i made out my mom crying on my chest. I slowly reached and touched her scalp. She didnt know i woke up. Short lived, i went back to sleep. Not just my mom was there but my sister too. They drove from California. How did they find me with no ID?

I stayed in that hospital for 3 months, due to my injuries and placed in the psych ward. My family visited me every few months. All that was going through my head is 'I'm alive" it took me a while to figure out how to use my legs being one has nerve damage now. But i started walking before my bones could fully fuse. The nurses told me to stop.

After i gained disability and got placed in housing, i bought a game to occupy my time. No more work outs, no more running, just me trying to forget the reasons i gave up on life. A couple months to about a year later my mother asks if i want to leave the housing and save the disability money. I said yes to that. I didnt know they'd take me back to california on my birthday. It was a nostalgic drive.

I picked up a walking routine and decided talking to ashley was always going to end with her thinking about my faults. I stopped calling her for probably 4-5 years no messages, nothing.

One day my mom asks if i want to go for a ride and talk. We drove until we reached the on ramp she passes me her phone with a picture of Ashley holding a baby. It was Zipporah. What should i have felt? If ashley is dead why did ashley hold onto the dream? And share it with someone who just left her holding the bag. I couldnt believe it after how hard we tried to bring her into this world.

But i cant chase Ashley anymore, i cant even run, literally.

I didnt know if she was married or not to the dude all i know is his ass wasnt in any pictures with the baby. Ive done some searchin around, he was some dead beat who'd prey on women revealing there weak sides on the internet instead of reality. Yeah I never liked virtual dating. That or the websites. Why do for me what i can do myself?

Even after zipporah was in my view i was a happy mad. Happy that Ashley finally got her family minus the father. But mad at the whoremonger man who just left her. I was a little sore with Ashley for hiding it.

Its been a a year and a couple months after the pictures were seen. I started forcing the thought of Ashley out. I wanted her to disappear, me or her, but mainly me. She wants to chase body parts thats on her. But Im broken now. I still love her and sure some might say less than before but i say im just skeptical now. Besides what good is seeing me broken going to do for her? Idk if she'd just laugh at me again. I kinda wish she would, so i can take these feelings and curse the day she ever earned my love.

Whats the point in arguing though. We were so happy until people stepped in and sabotaged our emotions. You hate me for cheating, laughing at what happened between the father and you and walking away. When i should have stayed. I forgave all the crap in the past. But im almost done.

The doctors told me i dont have much time left after my jumping act. I messed up my innards pretty good. The alcohol relaxed the impact though. I dont want to tell my mother, she'd flip over what im talking about. I think i can close the book on this life well too.

Even though i didnt get to help raise the dreams we shared i learned you still held onto dead things just to keep the dream alive. Ashley is alive in there somewhere, only ashley would name that baby zipporah.

I can leave happy.

[ocenitram]

Babysitting My Mom

Emma couldn't believe the humiliation she has to go through today she was us to  parts of  her life being humiliating by now ever since this new problem arose from nowhere, but what Regina is doing to her is embarrassing enough on its own, "Come on Emmy you can do it make a poopy on the potty for nana Gina I know you can do it," Emma's face head it up as she heard the women encouraged her to use the potty it wouldn't have been so embarrassing if she was on a toilet but no she had to sit on a pink plastic potty in the middle of her former enemy now step-grandmother office. That wasn't the worst of it the worst of it was Emma knowing that she would end up back in her diapers a stack of changing supplies were waiting for her on Regina's desk. "If you can't make a poopy what about a pee-pee?' Regina tried to switch tactics to get her Sep-granddaughter to use the potty like a big girl. "Emmy will you go pee-pee for M&Ms unky Henry use to go potty for M&Ms." Regina took out a bag of M&Ms and showed them to Emma. Emma looked at Regina and the bag of chocolatey goodness and she tried to push however nothing came out she just looked at her step-grandmother and shook her head no. She just really didnt have to go. Okay sweetie lets get you diapered up and down for nap we'll tell mommy what a good little girl you were for sitting on the potty." Regina took Emma by hand and lead the savior to the stack of changing supplies Emma shyly took Regina's hand and followed as she was getting changed "I dont really take naps," was all Emma managed to say after such on embarrassing ordeal. Regina just smiled she knew that Emma was trying to get out of her nap. "Tell you what baby girl I'll teleport you to my home and you can watch some tv okay?" Emma looked at Regina to try and see if she was lying when she couldn't find ant trace of fibs she nodded "okay nana," Emma agreed with a wave of Regina's hand Emma had been teleported to her tummy mat with the Tv on in some babyish channel for Emma to watch.

Emma was in a trance as the tv character sang silly songs and did funny things she then heard the door to the house open immediately she knew who it was it had to be Henry he was the only other person who had keys to Regina's home. Dont get her wrong she loves her uncle/son. She just dint like the way he babysat her hew as going to maker take a nap and maker potty on her diapees so Emma did what another baby would and hid from her babysitter 'surely Regina was behind this that sneaky nana' thought  Emma from her hiding spot as Henry entered "Emmy am home," Henry loved both his mothers but he saw Emma more of sister now niece type of figure considering everything they've been it was nice to see his birth mommy get a happy ending most people thought it meant for Emma to have a love but Emma's happy ending was with her mommy and daddy and bubba. Emma kept quite in her hiding spot which caused Henry to look for her it seems The Henry had received Charmings traits of finding the people he loves "There you are baby come on its nap time." Henry picked Emma up and carried her to the nursery that was set up for her in Regina's home Henry had never been so thankful to magic, If it was not for magic putting the baby down for a nap would had been more difficult. Henry laid Emma in her Crib turned on the mobile and gave her a warm bottle and of course Henry read from his book. As Emma heard the story and drank from her baba her eyelids were getting heavier impossible to keep open and eventually she fell asleep.

In the middle of her nap her thumb had enter her mouth and like a real baby she had messed and peed herself. Emma just sleeps soundly and comfortable knowing that her family was there to help her and willingly give her what she needed it was a wonderful dream. "Emmy wakey-wakey," Henrys gentle and soft voice came which caused Emma to be excited as she woke from her nap "Henwy!" she lisped in excitement forgetting that her thumb was in her mouth. "Come on baby lets get you feed and then changed sniff sniff on second thought lets change your diapey and then we feed you." Henry had planed on feeding Emma first but the smell entering his nose told him that was a bad idea all Emma did was smile and giggle like a cheeky baby "Oh you find that funny come here little miss," Henry cooed as he took Emma to her changing table and even thou Emma was being a wiggle rascal Henry managed to change the big babies diaper "okay Emmy its launch time then bath time," Henry took Emma to the kitchen and strapped her in a highchair. He tied a bib around  Emma neck. Henry brought out some of the baby food and some desert for Emmy. Emmy behaved her self at launch she ate every bite including the desert although she behaved some of her food ended up on her bib and all over her face. Henry chuckled at the baby and cleaned her up. He freed Emm from the highchair and took her to the bathroom.

As they were walking to the bathroom Emma couldn't believe that her biologically son turned uncle would baby her and how much of a good job he was doing, it made her wonder why she claimed she didn't like him babysitting her. "Henry when did our roles switch when did you become the adult and when did I became the child ?" Emma knew the anwser to her question but that was a story for another day she just wanted to see how Henry would handle a question like that "Oh don't you worry about silly stuff baby," Henry ruffled Emma's hair and placed her in the warm bath tub. Henry gave Emma some bath toys to distract her as he bathed her and Emma played with the toys she had fun and she was enjoying herself. She even smiled when henry had ruffled her hair, it was the feeling of love that she had been denied in her actual childhood.  Henry finished bathing Emma and changed her into her pink frozen  pajamas. He first slid the pants that gave her an obvious diaper  buldge  "Okay arms up baby," Henry cooed as he tickled her sides causing Emma to laugh and giggle  Emma did as she was told and lifted her arms. there we go no lets get the baby ready for playtime taking Emma back to the living room she was placed in her playpen with a bunch of toys  and she played with all of them she put some of them on her mouth and Henry had taking them out of her mouth and placed a pacifier instead, whish Emma suck contently. Soon enough like any other baby Emma got bored with her toys and she started to wail like a little girl Henry however was ready "Look Emmy Elsa," he pointed at the tv and that did it Emma looked at the tv and waved at Elsa. "Hi Elsa," Emma yelled that on top of her lungs. "Why she no hear me she no like me?" Emma was tearing up she was thinking that her friend no longer wanted to be her friend. Henry wasn't sure what to sat specially since  his mother was in little space at the moment, "Ah she's on a secret mission and if she talks to you then she gets caught and they lose." Henry fibbed to her, usually he wouldn't do that and usually it wouldn't work thanks to her so called superpower, but since she seemed to be little she accepted and watch the movie in peace. Once the movie was over henry saw that Emma had once again falling a sleep and that was a good thing since it was almost past Emma's bed time He carried her to her nursery and tucked her in, "good night baby." He whispered kissing her on the forehead then he went back to the living book and read a book.   

[inspired-birth-co-blog]

For the ‘Wanderlust’ Parent

So, if you’ve been following me for awhile, or if you are a friend or family member of mine, you would probably know by now that I love to travel. Sione (my husband) has been a man who loves staying in his comfort zone, slowly, I have warmed him to the idea of travelling and exploring the world. (This has been a real effort for me because if you know my husband, he has a real chill personality, so like his personality, he is actually one to just want to “chill” and relax at home, or fishing, or kick it at the local beach. *Boring* So… because he is married to me and has lived with me for awhile now, he has grown to love travelling as much as I have :D *winning!*

So with that in mind, we have made it an annual thing for our little family to always travel every year to create the best memories for our children (annnd to give ourselves a bit of a break from reality, because lets face it, we love rewarding ourselves when we work hard ;) *Chocolate included*

We have travelled since our babies have been, well, babies. We have been blessed to see the likes of Samoa, Hawaii, Bali - Indonesia, New Caledonia, Vanuatu, Whitsundays and constant visits to NZ & Interstate trips to Syd & Melb. Oh and how could I forget Camping! We love camping!

I looooove looking back on our photos of a holiday. It motivates us more to make use of the time we have with each other and to switch away from everything and everyone and just enjoy the culture, the surroundings and of course the food!

Sooo.. I wanted to put together a few things I do to organise myself when travelling with kids. (Because seriously, sometimes even travelling can feel like a chore rather than an actual holiday) So I wanted to share my secrets on how I actually genuinely enjoy a good holiday with my children. 

Yep here come the bullet points, to break it down for ya’ll. (In no particular order)

- Lists! ALWAYS write out a list. From the day you book to the hour before you board the plane/ship - Check that list!. Write a list of all things you need to pack, get done, clean, organise, purchase before going away. Nothing like being on holiday and stressing that you didn’t pack something important or didnt organise a sitter for your pet at home. 

- Dose your kids up with immunity boosters. Yep, from vitamins B,C,D (If you feel like, try the whole alphabet) I have some great herbal meds and supplements that I rely heavily on that has ALWAYS come through for me. Why dose the kids up you ask? Well, the last thing you want whilst on holiday is a sick kid, or an extra extra sick kid for that matter, where you have to visit the hospital countless times (I have learnt this the hard way unfortunately) When you see me travelling, no lies, I pack my whole medicine cupboard. I’m a bit of a natural med freak so I pack my essential oils, herbal concoctions, supplements and probiotics. Of course, I have the handy back up of panadol. (when its’ really needed). The oils I use are amazing, and carry such a strong effect on all of us. Applying on specific parts of the body for specific oils make such a difference! Boosting the immunity helps the immune system tackle whatever is coming its way. So if you’re prepared, then once you are giving your children all the best things to make the immune system strong, their little bodies can overcome anything. 

- And with that note of sickness and children. I ALWAYS book travel insurance, I head to ‘compare the market’ and flick through travel insurers that suit us the best (depending on where we are travelling) Travel insurance has given me so much sense of security and a sense of comfort knowing I have a back up IF something was to go wrong. So don’t pass up on travel insurance, especially if you have kids. Better to be safe, than sorry.

- Pack that front pack!  I carried my son in my front pack EVERYWHERE. To the point where I would feel drops of sweat dropping onto my belly from my chest. It saved my life though. The carrier I had supported my lower and upper back and gave me two hands to do things with. So on top of carrying suitcases, checking in at the counter and going to the toilet, I actually lost kilo’s from exercising with my son strapped to my chest and having nowhere to go. (I did this with my son until he was 2 and a half, then I gave it up, as he obviously was getting too big for it, I was in denial that he was growing out of it, that’s how much I loved it!) ~ {We had the Ergo Baby which not only fit me, but also fit my Tongan husband}

- Now I’m still learning with this one, but learn how to pack light. I feel it so necessary to pack my children’s whole wardrobe in a suitcase. After going away on a week cruise, I am NEVER packing the way I pack again. Strictly, an outfit per day. And if for whatever reason, your kid decides to rub chocolate on their shirt or poop through to their pants, then use a piece of clothing you have packed. Its’ not the end of the world, because you know what, it takes 45mins tops, to wash clothing and dry clothing at the hotel you are staying in or at the local laundromat. And then taaa-daaahh you have clean clothes for your kids for the next day. If you’re travelling to an island, even better, your kids are going to live in their swim suit (TRUST ME) so pack light! I plan an outfit a day, with a back up jacket and long pants with a pair of socks, if it gets chilly. (depending where you’re travelling) I just find that on some trips, I come back with clothes that my children didn’t wear. Waste of space. So learn to pack light.

- Hotels. I have always found it necessary to book the best hotels wherever we travel too. I think having a good nights sleep in a clean, airy room is always winning for me. Also consider, existing health concerns, like asthma and being stuck in a dusty room, where you’ll know a asthma attack is brewing. (Trust me, been there, done that) So read the reviews, research and study it, and I mean thoroughly, research and read all reviews on a hotel before booking. People will give their honest opinion on a room. Whether it was dirty upon arrival, dusty, musty, appliances not working, air con not working etc.. You need to be in the loop. I look on all known websites to compare the prices on the room of our liking and if you can, (this is a bonus and I always look out for this) try and book a room where it comes with breakfast included! This is the best, not only do you save money on your daily budget (more on that in my next bullet point) but you also get to feed your kids in the one location without stressing out on finding a place to eat early in the morning while the kids are moaning that they’re hungry. Its also financially better for you if the breakfast is buffet ;) 

- My fave. Keeping to a daily budget on spending. Sooo, on every trip we go on, I have a daily spend for the 4 of us - this includes, food and drinks. It’s good to calculate this way before actually going on the holiday as you have a fair idea on how much you would actually spend per day. If you know the currency exchange rates and know the prices of food (roughly) at the destination, then you’re in luck, budgeting will be so very easy! This is where my bullet point 1 comes into play as well, with keeping a list, I have a list on my phone on how much I will spend, and on what I will spend on. Say for example we plan to check out the markets - I will have cost for petrol or taxi/uber fee, cost for shopping and most importantly cost for lunch and drinks (I try to buy a bulk amount of water and keep refrigerated in hotel fridge - good way of saving money, check if hotel has a water filter, just pack empty bottles for the kids. I also pack my own snacks in check in luggage - packets of chips, sultanas, nuts, muesli bars etc, this helps with hungry hungry children during the day) - we have never had a problem with taking snacks via our check in luggage. Make sure you declare all food, depending on where you’re travelling too.

- Find a trustworthy Children’s club at the destination. A lot of resorts hold a kids club and Cruiselines hold a great kids club too. The kids club was so much more than just dropping your kid off and saying ‘See you never”, the children have the best interaction with their leaders and other kids. The activities are educational, fun and exciting and during the time the kids are in their club, mum & dad (yes, us,) get to reconnect and enjoy a beverage by the water and actually feel human again. Some destinations, will not have a kids club available, and hey that’s okay! A day out is more than enough to exhaust the child out or to add many stories for the child to tell their friends back home. Make sure you plan an agenda on things to do for the kids. Make note of what is around the surrounding areas, organise a budget for activities for the kids and read reviews on what it’s like (ie, theme parks, pools, beaches etc) You can actually find a lot of pages on Facebook and Google on a certain destination and read up on all the tips you need to know about a certain place. The information is endless. 

- Entering a third world country.  So we have been fortunate enough to travel to the pacific islands and to Bali Indonesia. These places are considered third world purely because of hygienic and economic reasons. Upon leaving Australia to Samoa, I packed a separate bag for hygienic purposes - Sanitizers, alcohol wipes, mosquito repellent, insect lotions, like seriously, the works! I went all out. So once we arrived there, I was on top of it. I would spray the kids down three hourly, apply lotions day and night, give them hand sanitizer before eating anything or even in the in-between moments and I would dose them up on probiotics from the food they would eat on a daily. I would have them keep a bottle of water in the bathroom, and have, not just the kids (but all of us) brush our teeth with bottled water, drink only bottled water and wash hands with bottled water. I did the same with Bali and stopped the kids from eating any type of food that needed to be washed by water - apples, strawberries, salads etc.. I was super strict and boy am I glad, my kids and I enjoyed a holiday where we didn’t have any nasty tummy bugs on both trips. Hmm you must be thinking, I’m one of THOSE mums, well, yeah I am lol and I’m super okay with that. It seems like a lot, and a major worry to be on top of things like this, but I’m one of those paranoid mothers, who just needs to avoid any nasties coming our way, especially my children. I cannot stand feeling helpless when they’re sick. So how I justify it, is if I could prevent any sickness from entering my family, I know that I’ve done my job as a mother. 

- Now less serious stuff. It’s always a great idea to pack electronics for the kids to remain occupied on the plane. Fill the iPad or laptop with your kids favourite movies and shows. I almost always, pay the extra for in flight entertainment as it’s easier for me to just hop on board and be given an iPad as oppose to actually taking ours as it’s another thing to look after. I like to pack activity books and colouring in books for my kids. Stickers are great! You can utilise these as a reward. And snacks! Snacks always work a treat for us! 

- Also, I’m not sure if you all experience this but my children (and myself included - im probably the worst to get this) sore blocked ears. It is excruciating! I pack honey sucking lollipops for my kids (you can purchase these from Flannerys Health Food store) and also carry on essential oils. I use Melaleuca (Tea Tree Oil) on the muscle behind the ear that leads down to the neck. I massage in a downward stroke on both sides as this relieves the tension that is building up to the blockage of the ear. I also sniff the oil which helps with a potential headache from the ear blocking. This oil is my saviour! (Insert hallelujah hands emoji ;) and for those who receive nausea whilst flying, peppermint oil! Rub on tummy and I sniff this as well, and it helps settle the nauseas feeling. For babies I would rub oil under feet as the nerves under the feet connect to our sensory organs, this includes the ears. And for tummy, just an oil rubbing on the tummy.

- Check this out, I came across an article about Plane Pals. A plane pal is an inflatable foot rest that you can take on board and use for children of all ages. I mean, come on, how uncomfortable is it having your child sleeping on our laps with their neck/head scrunched up in so many angles, just to get comfortable. Not forgetting how uncomfortable we are for having our children’s limbs all over us if they’re asleep on the seat beside us. The plane pal helps create like a recliner effect where the kids can lie down without annoying the person beside them. I LOVE IT!! How amazing is this creation, I only wish I knew about this product when we travelled to Hawaii on a 9hr flight. :-/ {www.planepal.com.au} 

Now - Lastly, book and choose your holidays wisely. Nothing like booking a holiday with specials for flights to find out accommodation, transportation, exchange rate is through the roof! You cannot justify a holiday that cost $300 return per passenger to then book $5000 accommodation  and still counting on how much spending money you are planning on taking. This just wouldn’t be fair to you, your children and the whole reason of wanting to go on a holiday. For me, and for many others, i find, a great holiday is a place where the flights are cheap, the food is cheap and basically all rounder the whole trip is cheap. Let’s be real, we want value for our money. The best way to have a ‘cheap’ holiday, is to do so much research on the place you’re going too. Find what works for you and your family. (selling point) If you haven’t done so already, check out a cruise line and book it. The value for your money is incredible! 

Now I hope most of the things I have mentioned in this post are either helpful or informative. You can take what you want from it, as you are the one who knows your child and what works for your family. You also need to think about what works for you as a parent. Now, it sounds like hard work, but what part of parenting isn’t?! And what part of travelling does not consist of hard work? To create a good holiday, we need to be informed, be aware and be open minded for what’s to come (this includes a tantrum on a plane) 

Let’s be honest though, we are never really looking forward to the journey there and back, but whatever you can do to make it comfortable for all, you would want to get your hands on those tips, and it is my pleasure to share with you all, what works for us. 

From one parent to another - just relax. After all, you are on holiday! 

 Shana x