#(ive been wanting to do that for a while after seeing that one tumblr post)

[isjasz]

[Day 69]

“I’m not going to kill you.”

Kinda from @mochiwrites and @hitheeprithee 's fic ties of string and sand i hate you guys happy day 69 mfs <3

[neil-gaiman]

hey mr gaiman. i saw that this post got revisited and wanted to address it.

i submitted this ask over a year ago on my old account and it was one of the stupidest things i ever did. it was my first tumblr account. id only been really online for a few weeks. i was 13. i was just coming back to school after a global pandemic.

ive been a fan of good omens for years and a fan of yours for longer. i was brought up reading odd and the frost giants and fortunately the milk, and as i got older i fell in love with your norse mythology book, good omens, snow glass apples, the sleeper and the spindle, and more.

i was excited to see one of my favorite authors on tumblr and tried to come up with the most bold and interesting ask i could think of.

i was rude and misinformed and it was a stupid choice of me to send it in with no thought.

but i got feedback. some in the form of kind suggestions. quite a few in the form of death threats and people telling me to kill myself.

while those specific messages were rude and hateful, the point got across. i educated myself to the best of my abilities, and eventually came back online.

not only did i misuse the term queerbaiting but i also implied that you were not an amazing supporter of the queer community. that’s absolutely incorrect. you’ve done so much for us with activism, representation, and overall kindness.

i wanted to address this ask that got so much attention because despite moving accounts i still feel guilt and shame every time i see it, or even when i interact with any of your posts at all. i need to actually address it.

also, i wanted a proper apology to be made. by no means am i now a saint. but im trying to be more thoughtful about thinking before i speak.

whether or not you decide to make a public response to this, i think ill find some peace knowing you’ve received this. ive needed closure on this for a long time.

im overjoyed and thrilled that season two is so close. thank you for tolerating the dumb questions of pretentious kids and thank you for helping to create a world where we can grow to be better than we were.

First of all, and most importantly, I'm really sorry that people were mean to you. That's awful. And nobody should ever have to deal with death threats or online threats and attacks, let alone a thirteen year old.

And secondly, you do not owe me an apology. I figure I have a Tumblr account, people ask things. Mostly they'll get nice replies, occasionally (normally when I'm being asked the same thing over and over) the replies will be terser. There has to be a certain amount of rough and tumble though, and occasionally I'll grab an ask that represents all of the asks I've had on that subject, and try and reply to all of them. That's what happened to you. I was getting tired of being accused of Queerbaiting for the occasional answer about a Season that was not yet released and about which nobody knew anything. And I needed to tell everyone who was doing this that they had to stop now. You had the misfortune to be the representative of all of the other people.

If you are not making mistakes you are not human and you are not learning anything.

(I wish there was tone of voice on the internet.)

And I think you are growing and learning and will make a fantastic adult.

I really hope you enjoy Season 2 when it drops.

[angstywildcats]

it’s been a hot minute since ive read warrior cats so i just wanted to ask what the relationship between ferncloud and brightheart is? and in turn the general premise of your coming surrounding them? im really interested!!

It has been a hot minute since i've touched a book too, anybody is free to correct me but. In canon, they really just were apprentices at the same time.

If you wana pepe silvia it up, it should be noted that the books however included that:

Fernpaw and Ashpaw's mother is killed by the dogs

Swiftpaw would invite Fernpaw (and Ashpaw) to find out what's been out there hunting down Thunderclanners (It should be stated that Swiftpaw, I think, did this for his Warrior name and wanted support. I don't know if there was ever any mentioned other noble cause on saving his Clan or specifically his apprentice denmates)

Brightpaw and Swiftpaw leave, that whole tragedy happens.

Fernpaw is the one to confess to Fireheart (and Cloudtail, I think?) about where the missing Swiftpaw and Brightpaw's whereabouts are. Which, theoretically helps Brightpaw be found in time.

The book never really shows them interacting otherwise, as far as I can remember, but Ferncloud and Brightheart also most likely shared time in the nursery together since they have kittens around the same era... which you never see because that's in between The Prophecies Begin and The New Prophecy, and Whitepaw is an apprentice by then.

Basically I'm making mountains over underdeveloped molehills over side characters, but I think with what's given, there's a lot of emotional exploration to be had over it, while still feeling in-line with canon!

I should say as well, I was all particularly inspired by this because a couple of Warriors videos ('Danse Macabre', 'No one, Everyone, Your mama') both included a shot of Fernpaw watching them leave in the night. It's such a simple thing to include, but there's a lot of weight to seeing your friends the very moment they leave to go on a suicide mission and one of them never coming back! What would have happened if you broke their trust and just told on them to not leave! Is it your fault they died!?

Soooo with all that being said, and my absolute hunger for just... more interpersonal relationships between characters in Warriors (which they fail me for even the main characters), there's a lot of strong potential in this.

With my take on Brightheart and Ferncloud, I just see them as really good or bonded friends who grew up together. They go through a lot through shared trauma, and based on the tidbits of personality given for both of them, I think they also would get along. Fernpaw being timid, Brightpaw being caring for others. In my comic I've added a bit to also imply Brightheart agreed to go with Swiftpaw not only to support him but to do it for Fernpaw/Ashpaw as well. I hesitate to put any further label on it since... well, their children get together romantically so it would add to the tangle of bloodlines, but I def can see it as how some childhood friends have sibling bonds.

For the comic... you will have to see exactly what happens! It's short, chill. Mostly conversational, just like the Shrewpaw/Ferncloud one but i hope it still hits emotional beats. I think something just fun to chew on while I make it is... How would it feel to watch your friends try hunt something that killed your mother, and only one survives, coming out of it extremely shaken. What would seeing her again feel like.

Perhaps I have talked to much, but I actually planned to do an extension of this comic where it timeskips further on where all the apprentices, grown up, visit Swiftpaw's grave.... but I decided against this because. 1. This is already a lot of work to do this many pages. 2. It's gonna be pretty long already, and I do not like making extremely long posts on tumblr. 3. I found a different way to end the comic I preferred.

Here's the script. Perhaps maybe I'll touch on it another while but admittedly after this I may be tired of exploring the Dog Incident for a bit.

Thank you for being so kind and inquiring! It's very fun, I enjoyed explaining this.

[antiradqueerguy]

coming to your inbox because i like your vibe and have literally no other safe place to rant abt this. sorry if this bugs you delete this if you want but im debating leaving the radqueer community because of ciel/hbki. ive already been wanting to leave for a while, but the thought of leaving has been triggering my ocd and ive not been sure what to do. but after i saw that guy running around and seeing how obviously horrible he is, and how people still somehow like him, i think im going to go through and just delete my blog or ditch it ive seen him talk about abusing his girlfriend on so many different blogs of his and then i go to look at hers and she is so obviously trauma bonded to him, and its so triggering. it makes me sick how shes admitted to not enjoying how he treats her, but says his treatment is okay because its "consensual" but i really dont believe its consensual. and i know its not my business but i literally cant avoid them in this community. ive blocked them so many times but every time they both get termed, i see them again, and get triggered. ive thought about reaching out to opphie, but every time someone does, ciel is alerted and he starts harassing the person reaching out. maybe i just have a savior complex but seeing the way they are together makes me feel sick. i see myself in her and i feel guilty for not being able to help. one of my friends even watched her change her name on a dime in her discord server just because ciel suggested it. its scary that the community just lets ciel get away with everything. i mean didnt he even admit to *graping* her? and people are okay with it because the victim swears up and down that its consensual? it doesnt make it any better that antis treat him like hes just some edgy kid. yeah its true that he is one, but there are also very very VERY clear signs that he is actually a harmful person and that he is actually hurting someone. opphie even posted a list of a bunch of horrible things hes done, and it looked like a cry for help to me, but radqueers were reblogging saying things like "couple goals" and "this is so romantic" i dont know anymore what to do. i know i have to leave that community but i wish there was a way to make other radqueers realize that ciel is not a good person to have in the community. if they want to beat the pro-abuse allegations, they NEED to point out actual abusers like ciel.

TW: using images from ciels past and current accounts and mentions of r4pe

with ciel he avoids everything to do with him and taking accountability for his action, (EH HEM, his past use of ableist slurs towards people)

me personally i believe that ciel is a abuser. he has had a history of abuse and I've documented AS MUCH as i possibly can. i will not let him escape this and his HISTORY of abuse.

to the people who don't know what nonnie is talking about with ciel admitting to r4ping opphie heres a pic

Now ciel has a cult following, his boot licker fans love him, like hmm idk this

he is invincible, unless his connection to tumblr and discord is cut off his fans will continue to protect him and glorify his abusive behavior

#ciel is a abuser get his ass canned

edit: also HIII CIELLL i know you will eventually read this since you have commented on posts made by antis talking about you before, so howdy doo!!!

[copiousloverofcopia]

🐀 COPIA FIC MASTER LIST🐀

These are all the fanfiction AO3 links to Copia related content, both as Cardinal and Papa. Please see pinned post on Tumblr for other Papa content!

If you don't see something you are interested in please feel free to send an ask when open as well as commission me through the heart mug site. Link in pinned post!

Multi-Chapter Works:

⛧  The Cardinal’s Prime Mover (COMPLETE) >>> Copia & OC Sister Rosalia Sister Rosalia is a young Sister of Sin in the Church of Satan who is a dutiful and average girl until she falls for the Cardinal... hard. (NSFW-Romance/Pregnancy Loss/Sex w/the intention of pregnancy/Angst) Copia x Rosalia Sequel Snippets (Mini sequels to the Papas in Love stories): 🜏 Late Night Serenade It's been a long night for Prime Mover Lia, up all night with the baby. When Copia awakens to join her, they share a sweet moment together. (SFW-Fluff/Romance/Comfort/Daddy Copia) 🜏 Birthday Candles Prime Mover Lia's birthday is around the corner and Copia is struggling to come up with the perfect gift. Lia only has one thing she desperately wants in mind. (NSFW-Birthday/Romance/Fluff/Sex w/the intention of pregnancy) 🜏 The Major Leagues Sister Imperator has Copia doing another wild promotion event for Ghost, this time it's the opening pitch for the White Sox. Will his Prime Mover Lia help him gain the confidence he needs to go through with it. (NSFW-Ghaseball/Breeding Kink/Romance)

⛧ Death & Flowers (IN PROGRESS) >>> Copia & OC Sister of Sin Ollie It hadn't been serious, it never was with him. While Papa was suave and Ollie enjoyed their time together it wasn't meant to be. She knew it wasn't something meant to last…something permanent but—here she was. It was only one missed pill and life forever changed. (Romance/Comfort/Unexpected Romance/Pregnancy/Death) ⛧ The Red Dress (COMPLETE) >>> Corrupt Copia & OC Celeste Celeste is a stagehand at a local arena when her night goes south after a Ghost concert leaving her cornered by ghouls. Her life changes forever when she is told that she is to play a crucial role in the destiny of Papa Emeritus IV, and that the gimmick is real. (Dubious consent/Breeding Kink/Pregnancy/Violence/Dark Romance) ⛧ Something Blue (IN PROGRESS) >>> Copia & OC Astrid Sister of Sin Astrid is anything but excited for Cardinal Copia to return home from tour. As his assistant, she leads a life of monotony and boredom from which she longs for more. When the Cardinal returns, anointed as Papa Emeritus IV, she is faced with an unwanted and unavoidable situation predicated on her family's position within the church. Will Astrid rise to what has been asked of her or will she destroy everything and leave it all behind? (Romance/Comfort/Unexpected Romance/Angst)

One Off Works:

Whiskers The Cardinal's little ratto wakes you up... (NSFW-Romance/Vaginal Sex/Fluff) The Monstrance Clock is Ticking You've been invited to help Papa III and Cardinal Copia with a very pressing matter. (NSFW- Three-way w/Terzo, Breeding Kink, Sex w/the intention of pregnancy) Sweet Taste of You Copia has been begging you since the moment it began to let him, today you decide to let him get a taste... (NSFW-Lactation Kink) The Souvenir You had never felt more excited. Attending a ritual was something you had been dreaming about since you first heard Mary on a Cross, now some years ago, faintly playing over the speakers at the record store. Fast forward and here you were, against the odds, somehow managing to get a spot at the rail. (NSFW-Three-way with Cirrus, Breeding Kink) My Lioness Cirrus has grown close to the Cardinal now Papa. Now as they return home from the tour she is left to deal with her feelings and her Papa's request. (NSFW- Part 1/2/Copia x Cirrus/Breeding Kink/Sex w/the intention of pregnancy) His Pride and Joy Cirrus has grown close to the Cardinal now Papa. Now as they return home from the tour she is left to deal with her feelings and her Papa's request. (SFW-Part 2/2/Copia x Cirrus/Pregnancy/Fluff) Candy Wrappers It's Halloween night at the Abbey, Papa IV/Copia decides to spend it sharing his love of horror films with ghoulette Cumulus and a sister of sin. The 3 decide to watch John Carpenter's HALLOWEEN and pig out on candy while it storms outside. (SFW-Fluff/Halloween/feat. Cumulus Ghoulette) What Would I Do Without You You aren't feeling well so your beloved Papa Emeritus IV comes to care for you. (SFW-Fluff/Romance/Comfort) Well Read Copia returns to the Abbey as Papa IV. No longer the Cardinal that you befriended in the library. Now you like awake at night your mind set on him when you decide to do something. (NSFW-Romance/Fluff/Love Confession) The Burning Ones Cardinal Copia is in love with a Sister of Sin he has known the majority of his life and now on the precipice of being Papa he must chose between her and possibly losing the Papacy. (NSFW-Older Sister of Sin/Romance/Fluff) On a Pale White Horse You've entered your second trimester and the need to have your Papa in the most carnal of ways is growing--there's just one catch his nerves. (NSFW-Romance/Pregnancy/Lactation Kink) They Come At Night The Cardinal has been sneaking out at night, tonight you find out where he goes. (NSFW-Three-way with Terzo/Vampire Terzo/Dracopia/Blood/Resurrected Terzo/Dark Romance/Period Sex) The Show Papa Emeritus IV has returned from tour and now you and Dew are to put on a show. (NSFW-Copia likes to watch/Feat. Dewdrop-Sodo Fire Ghoul) The Quiet Ones Papa Emeritus IV has hit the height of his heat cycle and is despite for a hole to fill when there's a knock at his door. (NSFW heat cycle/Copia x Rain ghoul) Too Small Couch A night spent cuddling and binge watching your favorite shower with your lovers, Cardinal Copia and Papa Emeritus III. (SFW-Hanging w/Terzo/Fluff/Comfort/Humor/Non-Gendered reader)

Open Road You've been dating Cardinal Copia for a bit now and after learning about your love for motorcycles he decides to surprise you with a ride. (NSFW-Motorcycle ride/Romance/Fluff) Ghex on the Beach Papa Emeritus IV has finally returned home from tour and heading straight back into his Papal duties when he tells you to pack up you're going to the beach. (NSFW-Chapter 13 theme/Romance/Fluff) According to Plan Papa Emeritus IV plans to pop the question to you, but nothing is going right. (SFW-Proposal/Angst/Romance/Fluff/Humor) Mending Wounds Copia and his Prime Mover have reached the moment where consummation of their relationship must take place, but the couple must deal with the unhealed wounds of her past. (NSFW-Mentions of SA/Comfort/Fluff/Angst) Papa's Blanket Fort Copia surprises you with yet another thing he never kid as a kid, something you planned to fix---right here right now. (NSFW-Humor/Fluff/Comfort) The Promise Cardinal Copia and you have been dating some time now, both of you nervous to take things to the next level until a bit of serendipity finds you both alone together. (NSFW-Romance/Fluff/Loss of Virginity) The Keyhole After staying up to do paperwork for Sister Imperator, you head back to the sibling dorms in the dark of night. When a noise catches your attention, you can't help but let your curiosity get the best of you and go to investigate finding the noise and a light peering from the keyhole coming from inside Papa Emeritus IV's office. As you discover the source of the mysterious sound, things change forever. (NSFW-Voyeurism/Romance) Okie Dokie Your shy Cardinal invites you to meet in your favorite spot of the chapel, deciding tonight is the night he commits to you in an act of carnal pleasure. (NSFW-Romance/Fluff/Chapel Sex/Virgin Copia) The Cherry Stem Your recent break up and late-night depression sends you into a hole in the wall bar when you meet a man who is intrigued by the trick you can do with a cherry stem. (NSFW-Romance/indoctrination of a new Sister of Sin/Public sex) The Fires of Indignation You are excited but ever so anxious as the time when you become Copia's Prime Mover draws near. One night when you forget your notes for your part of the ceremonies you are confronted with a grudge held against the Emeritus family bloodline. (NSFW-Violence/Feat. Alpha Ghoul/Mentions of Pregnancy/Blood/Revenge) Jesus He Knows Me Father DeFroque is a pious leader of the church who spends some quality time worshiping his true lord of Easter Eve. (NSFW-MFM/Degradation/Oral/Priest kink/Facial/Blasphemy Kink) As A Man Would Cardinal Copia has fallen hard for a Sister of Sin but keeps his distance knowing that he hides something about himself that will keep them apart forever. (SFW-Angst/Romance/Hurt/Copia is Death) Inspiration When your Cardinal invites you to meet him in the main hall of the Abbey wearing nothing but your nightgown and a smile, you are in for a night of pleasure. (NSFW-Romance/Public sex) Now We Wait Copia has something he has been wanting to talk with you about and now is the perfect time. (NSFW-Romance/Breeding kink/Sex w/the intention of pregnancy/Copia POV)

All Just For Show Papa Emeritus IV has reached the final show of the Re Imperatour and you know what's coming next... (NSFW-Angst/Hurt/Comfort/Violence) For Us Copia has had something on his mind, and you are determined to find out what it is. (NSFW- Romance/Breeding Kink/Sex w/the intention of pregnancy/Transmasc reader/Angst) Unwind Being a sibling of sin is hard...especially when dealing with the wrath of Sister Imperator. Copia helps you find a way to relax. (NSFW-Romance/AFAB Reader/Vaginal Sex/Anal Sex/Anal fingering) Gentle Sin Copia has been keeping his feelings for you secret for so long. What happens when you confess you are feeling them too? (NSFW-Romance/Love Confessions/Copia POV/Angst) And Then It Hit Him You have news for your husband, Cardinal Copia on the brink of his ascension to the Papacy, but will he stop long enough to listen? (SFW- Romance/Fluff/Pregnancy) Rush You know exactly how you ended up here and exactly how much trouble you'll get into if caught...but that's not stopping you and Cardinal Copia from consummating your feelings. (NSFW-Rushed Sex/Vaginal Sex/Confession booth/Cardinal Copia)

Copia One Off Works Featuring Other's OCs):

Something Within Your Eyes (feat. OC of @sistersaccharine) Sister of Sin Saccharine is elated to learn that Papa Copia has invited her to meet with him tonight at the stroke of midnight which just happens to be her birthday. (SFW-Romance/Fluff/Love confession/Dancing) This Night Was Made For Us (feat. OC of @sistersaccharine) Sister of Sin Saccharine has big plans for her first Lupercalia celebrations with her lover Papa Emeritus IV... Little does she know he has a surprise of his own. (NSFW-Romance/Proposal/Valentine's Day/Lupercalia/Fluff) Stay With Me...Forever (feat. OC of @sistersaccharine) The day has finally come for Sister Saccharine to marry Copia. Won't you be our ghuest at the wedding? (NSFW-Romance/Wedding/Fluff)

Selfless (feat. OC of @vampghoulette) Caldera, an hardworking and selfless Ghoulette begins to feel anxious about the upcoming Re-Impera tour. Knowing Copia's time is coming to and end she struggles during preparations for the tour. As she tries to help Copia and Aether find out how she's feeling and help ease her concerns in more ways than one. (NSFW-Spit roasting/Angst/Three-way/Comfort/Body Issues/OC Ghoulette) A Whisper of a Thrill (feat. OC of @a-tired-sparrow) Deacon Via is the head of the Human, Ghoul, and Other Anomalies Resources Department at the Ministry. Their everyone's go to person and a frequent confidant and of Papa Emeritus IV. While they have never told Copia about their affections, an unexpected phone call and a meeting changes Via's life. (NSFW-Love confession/Nonbinary character/Romance/Fluff) Not Another Sleepless Night (feat. OC of @a-tired-sparrow) Deacon Via and Papa Emeritus the IV have been enjoying an intense romance until the beginning of the Imperatour threatens to destroy what they've built when Via can't let go of their work back home to leave with Copia on tour. (NSFW-Romance/Angst/Nonbinary character/Tour bus sex/Fluff)

⚠️COPIIA-Unrelated/Non-related AU⚠️

As the Night Settled In (Spin off from Let There Be Night) Copia pulls an all nighter after becoming Cardinal and gets some much-needed release when he gets back to his lover. (NSFW-Romance/MFM/Established relationship/UNRELATED/NON-RELATED AU)

Thank you for reading!

May he walk with you in Darkness, leading you from the Light

⛧ PM Ren

[pixiel]

hi! ive been using the old tumblr dashboard style you made and recently like in the past few days its been glitching... my reblogged posts don't show up on my dashboard and when i click on the posts in my archive and click to view it on my blog it glitches and reloads and kinda freaks out and then my blog only shows original posts i made...

i checked on a different browser and on my phone to make sure it wasn't a problem on my end and i reinstalled the style with the latest update. I'm not sure if this is fixable but i wanted to bring it to your attention.

thank you! <3

Hello! This is something that's physically impossible for Old Tumblr Dashboard to do! All my code does is move things (the sidebar to create a header, some menu items, etc) around on the screen, it cannot force your page to reload or hide any posts.

I've heard some people having similar issues with Dashboard Unfucker too. If you're not using dashboard unfucker as well, then it sounds to me like something else might be causing these problems for everyone!

After some quick testing, I can recreate these issues WHILE UBLOCK ORIGIN is turned on. I turned off all of my addons and tested each one by one, if I turn Ublock off and on again I can see my reblogged post being hidden.

Anyone who has been having weird glitching test out firefox with Ublock Origin or any other filter list/adblock/etc turned off. Edit: Or do the below. I don't know if this will fix the issues people were having with Dashboard Unfucker but it might!

After testing out what might be the cause, I believe it might be one of the filters applied, everything seemed to work again when I removed it; ww​w.​tum​blr.​com##div.W45iW.KYCZY.rZlUD:nth-of-type(1)

So click on Ublock Origin, click the three cogwheels on the bottom right, go into My Filters, and see if you have that or something similar flagged to be blocked by Ublock Origin. If you don't, remove all filters that have https://w​ww​.​tu​mblr​.co​m written above/next to them and start fresh.

If that doesn't fix it, I'd definitely recommend turning literally every extension/add-on off and seeing if you still have the issue - even extensions that are unrelated to Tumblr, every single one! If you still have issues with Tumblr after that definitely contact Tumblr support tumblr.com/support

If you don't have any issues, turn each extension/add-on back on one by one until you find whatever one is causing problems!

[shankschewtoy]

hihihi! this is my very first request as i have just recently made an account in tumblr and ive been reading youe content for little while now. i really love them 💕💕💕💕

could i request for swapped au where the worst gen trio(?) see reader-san getting angry for the first time?

their haki explodes everywhere as they stared at the person who triggered them with so much hatred and literally almost knocks everyone out with how strong their haki is. over all, it's your choice. thank you!!!!! ☺️☺️☺️

a/n - I’ve gotten a couple other requests that are very similar but then I forgot to post this :’) aww tysm anon! You’re so sweet 💜😭

Warnings ⚠️ - daily reminder that I bully kid, g/n reader

Stunned

Kid

- It was a pretty normal day for the guy, just tinkering with some newer projects, and watching one piece

- He’s a happy man if he gets to do these two things lmao

- This scene was a bit different than others, it was thrilling, suspenseful, everything you’d want in an action/adventure series

- You were fighting a villain that Kid really despised, he thought she was so annoyingly irritating (no I don’t understand kid)

- Honestly, you personally didn’t like this woman either, sadistic, god awful, horrible taste in fashion, annoying devil fruit ability, and she also had this tone of voice that made you want to strangle her to death everytime you heard her

- “Aw y/n don’t be a stranger! We’ve known each other for so long now.. So I’d consider us as friends!” She had this fake smile that made you want to punch her teeth out

- You almost gagged at her words, friends? You were far from that

- “Can’t Oda just fucking kill her off..?” Kid muttered to himself, almost reaching for the tv remote in order to fast forward the scene

- He stopped right before he pressed the fast forward button because he saw you twirling your scythe around, like you always did before you got serious in fighting

- You rushed towards the woman, clashing, weapons scraping each other’s weapons

- The woman laughed, holding her hand out, and causing your scythe to fly out of your hands

- “Repel..!” The woman said with a giggle, slamming her baseball bat into your head, sending you flying towards a rock

- Kid looked angry, worried, but also so enraged he could punch through a wall

- “JUST FUCKING DIE-!” -kid

- You grumbled something under your breath, struggling to recover from the hard hit to your head

- The woman dragged her bat across the rocky ground, the metal screeching noise echoing through your ears

- “Maybe we can’t be friends.. After all, I can’t be friends with someone who’s so weak.” She said with a disgusted look on her face, stopping when she was around 10 meters away from you

- Something snapped when she said that to you, what did she call you? “Weak”?

- You grabbed your scythe, and you slammed the bottom of it onto the ground, a wave of haki flowing out of your body, your eyes almost glowing with fury

- The woman faltered, falling onto her butt in such a pathetic way that children would laugh if they saw it

- You slowly walked towards the woman, your eyes wide with rage, your irises trailing with your powerful aura

- “Wait! Please! I’m sorry! I didn’t mean anything I said!” The woman pleaded, standing on her knees and holding her hands together as if she was praying to a god

- You simply looked at her with a pitiful look, “Who’s the weak one?” You asked her, putting your scythe’s blade to her neck before you finally eliminated her

- this long battle was finally over, Karen, the repelling magnet was finally dead, killed by you, the crimson reaper

- “LET’S FUCKING GO! FINALLY!” Kid yelled, slamming his hammer into the table as he kept cheering your name at the top of his lungs

- The neighbors filed a complaint and called the police because they thought Kid was either high on some shit, or just fucking psychotic

- “Uh does a Eustass Kid live here? The neighbors were complaining that this house was too loud, and suspicion of drugs was reported.” The officer said as Kid looked down with an irritated look on his face

- “I don’t do drugs, I was just watching tv.”

- the officers were lowkey scared of him, so they left him alone

- “FUCK YOU KAREN!” He flipped a middle aged blondie off with an angry look on his face

- “See?! I told you! He’s dangerous!” The woman cried to the police

- The officers didn’t want anything to do with Kid, so they immediately tried to calm the Karen down

- “God, I can’t even watch one piece without her loud ass complaining about stupid shit.”

- The Karen has repeatedly informed the police about Kid, and they’re too scared to do anything about him 👍

Law

- The enemy you were fighting was starting to get annoying, why was he so fucking talkative?

- You needed this guy to just shut up before you literally exploded

- “Hehe! Can’t get me can ya? Awww.. You getting tired~?”

- You were about to drop kick this man into oblivion

- Your attacks were getting quicker, faster, was it your anger towards this guy?

- The man ended up slicing your shoulder with his blade, the steel digging into your skin, smearing blood all over the side of your face

- You grunted, grabbing your shoulder to try and stop the blood from pouring out

- the man laughed, twirling his blades around in his fingers while cackling

- His laugh was so goddamn loud, could he just shut up?

- Something snapped

- You clenched your bloodstained fist, shaking it quickly, the blood dripping off your knuckles

- The man still laughed, looking at you like you were just a silly act in a play, a comedic commercial

- Haki surrounded you, that same color, the color of the king

- Your fists were clad in haki now, your eyes wide open with such rage

- Law was sitting on the edge of his seat, hands clutching his knees

- He’s never seen you like this, he didn’t even know your haki was this strong

- he was stunned, he couldn’t even move, when was the last time he blinked?

- your aura caught the enemy’s attention now, it made him freeze up, chills down his spine as all the hair on his body stood up

- He was frozen, his eyes wide, sweat dripping down his forehead

- You slowly walked towards him, the enemies that were on the battlefield were knocked out from your haki

- The man was visibly shaking in his boots, struggling to even maintain eye contact with you as you stopped right in front of him

- “Not so talkative anymore are we?” You asked in a smooth sounding voice, holding your fist close to you as you twirled your scythe in the other hand

- You didn’t even wield your weapon, you slammed your hardened fist through his face, sending him flying into his own frightened soldiers

- They created a pile, a lump of pitiful enemies

- You didn’t even waste your time dealing with them, you took the blood that was splattered across your fists, and sent that blood flying towards the men

- That blood turned into a shuriken, slicing through the men, leaving them screaming as your aura settled back down

- Law dropped his cup of tea, his face purely shocked

- oh god he loved you even more now if that was even possible

- This moment would be replayed every single time he felt like he wasn’t gonna make it through the day

- It’s his hype up video :D

- every single time he watches it, he gets more stunned 💀

- he’s a deer in the headlights pretty much

- he’s that one guy on Reddit who’s arguing with people named “justarandomguywithamustache” or something weird like that

- he gets pissed off when people don’t agree with him or understand what he’s saying

- Law ends up thinking everyone’s just really fucking stupid lmao

- he 100% stays up until 2am arguing with people about the grim details of your abilities in that specific fight

Luffy

- He usually watches one piece as he’s eating something, never before has he watched tv without meat in front of him

- this is an intense scene, you were getting irritated with how many enemies were surrounding you

- Their grubby hands were clawing at your scythe like they were animals

- “LUFFY! I SAID TO NOT FUCKING LEAVE YOUR SHOES BY THE DOOR!” - Zoro tripped over his shoes

- “SHHHHHHH-!” -Luffy

- he’s 100% in the zone right now, he’s not even taking a bite of his food, he’s just intently focusing on this fight

- You immediately kicked aside two of them, slamming both of your fists into two others’ faces

- Feeling their noses crack underneath your fists was such a disgusting feeling

- The scene slowed every time you landed hits on the surrounding pirates

- One desperately tried rushing towards you, throwing three bombs, the fuses about to reach their end

- Child’s play for the crimson reaper

- You dodged nonchalantly, letting the three bombs whip past your hair, exploding behind you like every other fight scene

- “YEAH Y/N!!!” -Luffy was bouncing in his seat, his heals tapping against the ground with anticipation

- The man who threw the bombs was absolutely stunned, frozen

- Haki enveloped your scythe, but suddenly, an enormous fist that was covered in haki slammed into your cheek, sending you flying backwards before you could even react

- “WHAT?! NO-! NONONO- Y/N GET BACK UP!” -Luffy

- You groaned, vision slightly blurred from the impact of the punch

- The pirates who punched you looked intimidating to say the least, his eyes dark, an intense exchange of eye contact between you two

- You were angry, you were just about to finish the fight, and then some asshole just had to come and punch you in the face?

- He rushed forward again, raising his fist like the time before, but this time, haki surged out from you

- Your aura was being sent out in pulses of frightening, chilling power

- The man hesitated, stopping his advance as his henchmen around them started collapsing from the sheer force of your indomitable willpower

- “The color.. Of the king?” the man asked with stunned eyes, his fingers were shaking with worry

- “Try it, try to punch me again.” You said with a dark look in your wide open eyes, you looked down on this pirate with the most disdain in your face

- He screamed, throwing his fist at your face before you simply punched him first, using your scythe to force him into the air

- You jumped off the ground, raising your scythe above you and slamming it into the pirate, sending him flying back down, through the ground

- You won, that was an understatement..

- Luffy was amazed, sparkles in his eyes, “SEE?! I knew it! He never stood a chance!”

- “Sabo did you see it?! Now do you see why y/n’s so cool?!”

- “Wait wait wait- SEE?! It’s slo-no that means it’s super powerful and cool! And oh- look at her cape! It changed to a different shade of red!”

- He was such a fanboy

- He needed to scream into a pillow from how hyped up he was right now

- Sabo and ace were so confused and had to sit through Luffy’s long episode of fanboying over you lmao

- He’s that one kid at school that thinks you solo every verse

- Luffy will hold true to that for as long as he lives 🫡

a/n - I love combat stuff 😭 I wrote this in hc form because it was just a bit easier for me :) I hope you enjoy anon! So sorry to the other anons who requested something similar to this- it took me a while :’)

[wygolvillage]

a new year's resolution

well, as of 2024 i’ve decided i will no longer be posting on tumblr... this shouldnt be the hugest surprise since ive been pretty critical of staff, the over-monetization of the website, the site culture, and the user experience for the past year and gradually reducing my time spent scrolling the ol’ dashboard- ive even mentioned my intent to eventually leave; well, that eventually is now! gradually ive found myself analyzing the effect that using tumblr for 7+ years has had on me, and the effects of social media in general.

ive never had to write a goodbye letter like this before. while ive joined and left several online platforms over the years, its always been a gradual fade in interest rather than a conscious decision to stop. never have i used a platform as long as ive used tumblr, over 1/3 of my life. ive grown up with tumblr, for better or worse. how do you write a goodbye for that? i guess ill have to try my best. because as important as tumblr was for me, ive recognized the way its hurt me too.

finding other avenues of online self-expression particularly has made me think a lot about this. when i edit my website i feel accomplished, happy, and content, feeling i have put something of myself out into the world, my seed to grow and garden to tend. when i scroll through tumblr i feel as if my brain is mostly idle, and when i do emotionally respond its often out of anger or annoyance, because anger = engagement and social media sites like tumblr WANT engagement. particularly because i have OCD ive found myself upset by certain aspects of tumblr discourse culture, as well- it is basically the Scrupulosity Website and much of the way i react to and interact with media has been colored by my years spent absorbing the viewpoints of said Scrupulosity Website! i even used to look up discourse topics on tumblr just to anger myself on purpose, which is a dangerous road to go down, to build up Enemies and Factions in your mind- this is how discourse culture works. the culture of tumblr teaches you to see the world in black and white, and to feel like youre always in danger of compromising your moral purity or being attacked by the morally impure. If You Don’t Reblog This You Are A Bad Person. even as someone who nowadays tries to stay away from discourse entirely, its still there in the back of my mind, because the way we interact on this website is colored by this. when im online i dont actually want to be angry all the time! in fact i like putting my effort towards more positive stuff. but additionally: tumblr made me unhappy but it also made me an addict

and yeah social media addiction sounds like a silly boomer thing to complain about but one thing i noticed when i started trying to curb my time spent on tumblr was that opening the site was damn near compulsive. we all know those “open tumblr, close tumblr, open tumblr again immediately after” memes but that did describe my behavior pretty accurately. the draw and allure of social media feeds is powerful, if i accidentally click the youtubes short tab ill find myself a half hour later scrolling through random shit i don't care about and asking well how the hell did i get here? i dont even like that stuff! tumblr is no different no matter how much the site tries to coast on the reputation of being the last social media that's a “remnant of the old web” and “has no algorithm”. i like my chronological dash but it is equally as addicting to scroll through the thousands of people ive followed over the years, as it is to scroll through the algorithmic feeds of youtube shorts, because that's just social media!

and kicking addiction is pretty damn hard. before 2023, i made two separate attempts at reducing my tumblr usage and both fell through within a week due to that addiction. for reference this current bought of thoughts about reducing my tumblr usage and making my online/irl balance more healthy, around the start of 2023 when i began working on my website and its taken me an entire year to wean myself off of the hellsite, bit by bit. theres a point where it stopped being a conscious act, and even as i was carefully whittling down how often i use tumblr with extensions like leechblock i still had that compulsion go off multiple times every day, its a really strange feeling. but now that ive found so many more ways to express myself online, i just feel more whole now... i guess what im saying is that when i post on tumblr my first instinct is to complain or wallow about something, when i post on my own handmade blog on my website i always want to talk about things that excite me or make me happy! and its been such a tangible change in the way i think and act and im certain its because of the way social media and tumblr have their own “societal expectations” and structure that is built to feed on this negativity loop.

and a lot of the biggest shifts happened when i began immersing myself in the ideals of the web revival, while creating my own website. finding things that genuinely interested me and niches i want to occupy made me so much happier. i know we make a lot of jokes about having mutuals we never talk to that mean the world to us and i do think that is indicative of something. like, when i post on a forum full of strangers i am engaging with more “face to face” (or the digital equivalent) communication than i do with years-long mutuals. how genuine are these connections, this dashboard, the enjoyment i got from that meme post ill forget in 10 minutes? (not to say that i don’t genuinely care abt my followers and mutuals. ykwim?) i can still get all the things i enjoy out of tumblr in a more curated form via rss feeds; ive been so much more proud of what i post and create and code on my website. what am i here for? i gradually realized that i am losing absolutely nothing when i “miss out” or block tumblr on my phone or what have you.

since starting working on my neocities site ive felt so much creative drive. ive created whole interactive essays and worlds and games and writings and so many things i could never host on social media. my website is a place of my very own, and ive been learning the value of focusing on what i put out into the net compared to what i take from it. its made me feel so much more fulfilled when i spend time online.

and let's not forget about staff. i have broader issues with how automattic in particular has gone about running the site. the ads only took up more and more of the dashboard, and every month it felt like there was some new paid feature doomed to never take off. all while the user experience gradually degraded. using the site without browser extensions to fix the ui and block the ads and tumblr live and all the other shit they threw all over the place makes it look like its ridden with viruses, and i think the fact that its become so normalized to feel like we have to stay in spaces that become increasingly hostile to us, even while the internet is so vast, is really strange (i mean, i also thought that way at first). but Anyway. so much time and effort was spent on features no one liked or wanted in some desperate attempt to get a little extra money, while staff members get in public fights with users who complain about getting monetization shoved down their throat. its so openly pathetic. the merch store had mostly mediocre designs and the digital tumblrmart is absolutely full of useless digital goods with free alternatives. considering this is a userbase that gladly donates to other sites donation drives for hosting costs (i.e. ao3, wikipedia, internet archive), i am shocked that staff never considered the obvious answer of a fucking donation drive once a year or so! the ceo telling people with concerns about the ads being unsafe for epilepsy to “just pay the ad free subscription” is one of the most disgusting things ive ever heard from someone officially representing such a platform. do not be fooled by the reputation tumblr has cultivated: all that it cares about is making money from you. tumblr is “in danger” because it can't turn a profit- because a profit is all they care about!

so why stay here when im happier elsewhere, apart from the addictive compulsion? that's what ive been thinking through for nearly a year, realizing that i have no reason to, and that weaning myself off of the addiction is in my best interest. i can create and blog and have fun online and connect with others and follow other peoples work all without the need for tumblr anymore! and i think id be all the healthier for it.

over the past year ive truly fallen in love with the internet again and ive loved putting myself out there, unrestrained in ways i havent felt since i was very young. but nonetheless ive learned a lot on tumblr, ive had some of the worst and best experiences of my online life, and i dont doubt that i would be a much different person if i had never been a tumblr user for as long as i was. but i had to break out of this shell eventually.

i keep going over this wondering how i can express every feeling in my head, how i can word everything just a little better, how i can make the perfect goodbye. but i think this will have to suffice.

you can still keep up with me online here:

-explore my website: i keep it consistently updated and im always adding new things and writing new posts on my blog! you can even speak to me directly on the site! if you sign my guestbook or use my chatbox ill try to respond :) if theres anything on this list you do id like it to be this one! i worked hard on it! you can even send me chat messages on my homepage! just keep in mind it may not display everything right on most mobile browsers, but it should be mostly navigable...

you can also subscribe to my rss feed. if you don't know what rss is, it allows you to use a feed reader to keep up with updates from sites all over the internet! my rss feed will notify you whenever ive made a new post on my blog or made an interesting edit on my site id like you to take a peek at :0 convenient, right?

you can also email me at wygolvillage@gmail.com to message me directly. if you prefer im also “wygolvillage” on discord

thank you and happy new years :) thanks for seeing me off as i sail to a new sunrise <3

[raccoonfallsharder]

When I saw the first guardians film in middle school, my love of our favorite raccoon began. Finding a community of Rocket lovers after keeping it silently inside for so long is special (in a way I can't articulate without sounding goofy bc it's an anthropomorphic raccoon we're talking about here). I graduate from college this weekend and want to thank you for your stories getting me through hard times and motivationless days. It's given me a knew way to enjoy the movies I've watched so many times :) What was the media that got you super into Rocket and inspired your fiction writing? Much love!!

first and foremost, i want to congratulate you. school is not easy, and i swear it gets harder and feels more high-pressure/high-stakes every year. i hope that your time at college has given you more learning experiences than all-nighters, more opportunities than stressors, and more joy than hardship. and i hope that you are able to take everything you’ve earned and enjoy your freedom from university surrounded by good people, with plenty of time and resources to do the things you love. if you haven’t yet, please take time to sit and breathe and really soak up the fact that you did this. be proud of yourself. you fucken deserve it.

secondly, i read this while walking to the parking garage at 11pm after helping at an event for my college students (i work at a university) and i had to sit in my car and wait till i stopped tearing up so i could drive home. this truly made me so happy and im so glad my silly stories made things even just a little easier for you. ♡

so, my falling in love with rocket was a process. (cue me narrating this for three paragraphs like a schoolgirl with her first crush)

when we first saw rocket’s back in gotg1 i was like, oh. he’s in so much pain. between that + his fucken sarcasm, i complained afterward that the movie would’ve been so much better if he was the main character (lol). i started lazily dabbling in comics content then. i hadn’t been big into marvel comics before (more of a dc/image comics kid) but rocket and groot were becoming my faves. i loved gotg2. so much more focus on rocket, and yondu’s arc had me bawling like a baby. gotg2 made me like gotg1 more, which is part of how i judge the quality of a narrative series tbh (and why i think series are so hard to make). when the first gotg3 trailer came out and it was clear this was rocket’s story, i was obsessed. i didnt watch any additional trailers or read any more comics — rare for me. i wanted to go in completely blank. then i went back to the theatre to rewatch it three additional times (i have never before gone to see a movie more than once in the theatre). i was like… almost bursting with love for this stupid raccoon at this point.

then i got around to reading his grounded comic arc, and it was like — the dam burst. i hadn’t written fanfiction since 2017ish, and hadn’t been on tumblr since 2016, but i was like — i have to write about this fucken raccoon. i need to take care of him lol.

so when you ask what media - i guess all of it? in increments? because of course now ive watched most of his various cartoon incarnations, read probably 70% of the comics content, halfway through a stream of the 2021 game, have one of the novels (sitting on the tbr pile) and frankly the love just continues to grow.

now that ive taken up thirty-two years of your life, i just want to say im so glad you found this fandom and this community. he may be an anthropomorphic raccoon but he’s meaningful to people, in so many ways. im so very very glad that he could be that for you, and that you’re here.

congrats again, nonnie. i hope post-graduation life rewards you with supportive people who love and understand you, with joyful new experiences, good health, and everything you need to live happily and fully.

[ghoulangerlee]

Fic authors self rec! When you get this, reply with your favorite five fics that you've written, then pass on to at least five other writers (if you’d like). Let’s spread the self-love 💗

hello, hi thank you so much for thinking of me with this <3 ive been down in the dumps about my writing recently for absolutely no reason whatsoever!

but anyway, onto the meat of the ask <3

you share not the blood of our, our, ours / eventual Copia&Polyghouls / wip is one that I'm going to rec all the time. because its like the reason i started writing for the ghost fandom LMAO. i wanted to see something like this and so i wrote it. its at 70k, the touring hasn't even actually started and probably won't start til we hit maybe 100k but I'm so PROUD of this one <3

ill split in two to stay the same / aether/dew/mountain / completed

another one that became so very important to me. written for a friend as part of an exchange. its my first finished multichapter fic in forever.

baby even though you just want to live / copia&polyghouls / complete

i love the trope of dying and coming back wrong and learning how to love again. this came about because of a tumblr post i saw once and im glad i wrote the thing bc it birthed the second part:

maybe you do have a lot to give / copia&polyghouls / completed

same premise as the above fic but the first part is told from the ghouls povs after reviving copia while this one is told from copia's pov as he learns how to be alive again. its such an interesting thing to explore. i need to write the third part haha

either born in hell of heaven sent / copia/dew / completed / smut

so this is smut but its like. look i have an ongoing headcanon based around copia dew and aether being in a committed relationship with each other and i occasionally write fic reflecting that. this one is my fav one because i love the banter :)

thank you so much for this btw, because sometimes i guess i do need to sit down and think about why i love writing and why my own works mean so much to me and this allowed me to do that haha. <3

[answrs]

Readmores And You - A Really Great Tumblr Feature!

(this is technically directed at stuff I've seen in a specific tag because of the content of said tag makes it more likely to spoiler things, but it applies to anyone likely learning the ins and outs of a new site. speaking of which, hello! welcome to tumblr!) (this got. longer than anticipated. apologies, I get bogged down in trying to make things as clear as possible. ^^")

I've seen this a lot recently in the VC tags especially, where the post goes something to the effect of "tw bloody animal!" then like six periods and the images of whatever dead thing the post is about.

I recognize this is probably being carried over from some other website (...reddit probably? maybe insta?) but please. I appreciate y'all so much for trying to do what you're doing. but this method of hiding pictures isn't effective on tumblr, but there is an infinitely better option!

"but why? it works fine on other sites?" firstly, a few extra lines typically don't even take up enough space on mobile (let alone desktop) to hide your pics, so even at a glance anyone is likely still seeing at least the top half of whichever picture you posted before even noticing the trigger warning on top. second, because you have to scroll all the way past the images at the bottom of your post anyway to get to the next one on your dash/in the tag/etc. so if someone comes across your post and the trigger warning is applicable as something they want to avoid, unless they have access to a keyboard to use a keybind shortcut that ive been here 12 years and still cant remember, they can't see any other posts after it without either having to scroll through the pics or outright block you. which is... not the most ideal of options I would say.

"but what else am I supposed to do then!?" I hear you ask.

READMORES!

tumblr has a wonderful feature known as a "readmore" that's built into the site! it creates a break in your post, which hides any content - be it words, images, whatever - that you place underneath it, not showing it unless the person viewing it clicks on the words "keep reading" (formerly "read more" - hence the name :D).

Cool, how do I do that?

on mobile you can place one by tapping an empty line and clicking the grey squiggle icon from the selection that allow you to insert an image/vid/link

which will place a squiggly line into the post you're making:

(desktop uses the same icon, it's just in a more compact row of icons.)

you can drag it around after placing it too, just like photos. (note: mobile can get finicky with this and it's usually just easier to remove it -click the big red X- and add it in the new place you want it.)

EDIT: some of the versions of mobile editor are broken and don't show the icons. to add it in manually type ":readmore:" (with the colons, but not the quotation marks) on its own line. Thank you for the reminder, LovingTogetic!

this is also a nice way to keep your blog tidy and not swamped in long and/or spoilery posts (say if you're posting 5k word fics, or extensive meta, or gushing over the ending of the latest game or TV show most people probably haven't seen yet)! it's not required, obviously, but it's generally considered a common courtesy for others that will be seeing your post cross their dashboard.

finally, an example of the readmore in action:

(ta-da!)

have fun out there y'all, I hope this is helpful ^^

as an aside (I wasn't sure where to put this but under the break seemed appropriate), you may also see a lot of personal/vent posts be fully under readmores as well, even if the post is only a sentence or two long. this is mostly so followers don't necessarily see it unless they specifically click, but there's a more frustrating history to it becoming a thing: when a post is reblogged, any content above the break is permanently frozen as it existed at the time, but anything under it will reflect edits made to the post. while not common, a certain type of user sometimes browse the various "do not rb" tags and will purposefully reblog personal posts in order to upset and distress the users. putting those things under a readmore make it so even if that happens, the text can be deleted from all iterations of the post. recently the site rolled out an option to lock a post to reblogs, but you gotta mess with the settings and it's mostly a habit after a decade here dealing with the nonsense.

[glitchysquidd]

Obviously don't have much context other than all that has been shown on tumblr but I wanted to get this cleared for me. I keep seeing people talk about how Melo should of kept it private but isn't Kazachi a Public Figure, he makes a living off of voice acting and twitch streaming a very public thing. He should of been called out publicly no matter how popular he is right? I'm really sorry if this comes off aggressive or idiotic, I have a problem with that and I really do mean this with genuine confusion and frustration, I feel like Melo had the right to publicly bring up not good actions done in private by a person who's job it is to be a role model and need to have sway on peoples thoughts and feelings to make a living? Am I not understanding this correctly? /gen

This is gonna be the last question I answer because I just want to move on from it but this is a completely valid question.

Yes Melo had the right as a person entirely, but it did not have to be taken to the internet. We were all friends and I thought Melo was mine?

But I guess they see me as a racist.

Same with Kaz.

Kaz said the N word in the context he was reading an offensive meme, he's POC a person of color. Doesn't make it right still I know, he apologized to melo in dms as a friend for saying it.

He said it once, still okay? No.

But not a reason to bring it to the internet.

Melo and Kaz were friends.

Melo brought it up to me and I very stupidly said with complete arrogance that basically

"yeah he makes racist jokes and is casually racist all the time!"

He doesn't.

That... is my fault, for spreading misinformation to a friend of mine about another friend.

I'm wrong for that.

I'm bad for that.

And I said that

"The n word doesn't matter its just a word"

That was arrogant of me as well. It's not just a word, it carries meaning behind it and you guys helped tell me that.

I've grown up in NY in a pretty small town.

I've grown up thinking, it's just a word because it used to make me uncomfortable bc so many people said it. I was told to grow up, get thicker skin, and that I'd be fine because it's just a word people like using. Everone says it in my town, doesn't matter your race they all say it.

I thought it was normal so I said what I said to melo, without realizing others have different experiences and others know it's bad.

I didn't know that.

But Melo didn't talk to me as a friend that I was in the wrong, we were good friends, we drew together, we laughed at stuff, we vented to each other. I thought Melo would tell me if I did something bad or wrong, or something that made them uncomfortable but they didn't...

Maybe they thought I'd yell at them?

I'm not sure...

But we were friends.

And I was even planning on asking to hang out with them until this happened. Because I hadn't done so in alil while.

This is something we could have talked about together. And I'm sorry they were to scared to talk to me as a friend and just blocked me and posted it.

No one seems to just correct friends on behaviors or things they say anymore.

It's the internet now.

They just block and post it online.

I understand if the situation were hurtful, like physically or mentally.

Maybe this had been bothering them for awhile but.. I thought they'd tell me if ive done something wrong.

I've had alot of friends this year find out I'm not growing up in a great place and they are correcting me on certain things that are okay to say or do. And I'm becoming a better person because of it.

At the end of the day I'm just an young idiot.

barely a adult honestly.

I literally know barely anything, school doesn't teach it, my parents don't either.

So my friends teach me.

I'm trying to still learn my rights from wrongs.

And Kaz in his own way is sorta too?

I don't know much personal info about him but yeah.

I don't know the environment he's grown up in but I know he's had friends pressure him to say it before or at least tell him to multiple times.

And I know he came to me upset after it happened, he felt bad, and uncomfortable with himself.

He never meant it in a malicious way or with malicious intent.

Btw you're not idiotic or anything, this question is out of genuine confusion.

I appreciate it.

Edit: it also ends up involving everone close to each other. I've had my brother receive a message and even a friend of mine from others.

I don't know if others had the same issue but it's making more problems than solutions...

[mygloviesme]

cool about it. || myg

no. 1: tell myself one day i'll forget about it

predebut/debut!yoongi x female idol

summary: kanako is an established idol with a growing career and a secret relationship with a producer from her label, haneul. when she’s asked to work with yoongi and rm to create a track for her, she gains unexpected feelings for a certain upcoming rapper. with her increasing fame, her controlling boyfriend, a set of six boys who seem to have grown an attachment to her, and a new boy who’d give her the world, how will she figure out a way to balance it all?

(definitely inspired by boygenius)

word count: 2.9k

genre: ANGST, friends(?) to lovers, slow burn

overall warnings: toxic relationship (not w/myg), verbal abuse, mentions of alcohol, heated making out

notes: this is my first body of work ive ever posted on tumblr. as you can see from the warnings, it’s pretty heavy and that theme will linger for a while. i wrote this while recovering from an abusive relationship i was trying to heal from and never intended to publish it but i feel I’m in a better place to continue it. I hope you guys like it. not a rough draft but definitely feels like it lmao.

inspo song: cool about it by boygenius

JANUARY 17TH, 2012, 5:12 PM.

The air was thin, dry, and coated with frost. The tip of my nose kissed with a small blush from the biting cold, I attempted to warm it up by pressing my palm to it. Of course it’s no use, as the weather doesn’t spare anyone. I bring both hands to my coat pockets and walk towards the building doors, one street lamp after another. There’s a slight flurry today but I try to romanticize it rather than hate it like I usually do. I’m the stereotypical person who gets hit with S.A.D every year as the daylight gets shorter by month and windows get frostier by day. I bring my hand up to the door handle, opening it swiftly to get inside the heated structure. 

It’s mid evening so I still have work to do. I head towards the studio where I’m expected, and of course, late. Bang PD had told me I would be working with some trainees/idols-to-be. I signed both of them on as producers, but I think by next year I’ll be rounding them up for a group. 

The man had a tendency to be cryptic, so whatever he knew about this supposed new K-pop group he was forming, I had no idea. I take a deep breath before opening the door to the studio. I never liked meeting new people and first impressions were something I had an unusual amount of anxiety for. I plant a smile on my face and twist the knob, seeing three bodies sitting casually on individual chairs, turning around. 

“Ah, Kanako,” Bang PD stands up, and I bow quickly. I haven’t yet met the eyes of the two boys sitting on the other chairs, and I wait for an introduction. 

“This is Kanako, you two. Kanako, this is Suga and RM.” He says, and my head follows where he points his fingers. They smile sheepishly, obviously as anxious as I was which made me feel slightly better. We bow as a group quickly and I let out a small huhaha that’s meant to be a laugh but it sounds more like a sigh. Bang PD’s hand floats over my back, leading me to the chair behind the boys. The distance is sort of awkward. 

We all take a seat and Bang PD clears his throat, shuffling with some papers. 

“So, this is going to be a slight trial run. We’re in the midst of your new album,” PD-nim faces me, “And I thought it might be good to have some new minds create a track for you. We had a song brainstorming, Kanako.” He says and passes me the paper with lyrics on it. The song title is Full Moon. 

I read the lyrics and they’re more sensual than I expected. I assumed that’s what was happening with this album as I expressed I wanted to steer away from the whole ‘girl next door’ facade I had going on. I had already been named South Korea’s little sister, so the implications and expectations people had of me was something I felt rubbing off on myself. I couldn’t let myself fall into that, I knew that much. 

As I get done reading the lyrics I nod, “This is great. You got a beat for me?” I say confidently. 

Suga, which I assume that’s his stage name, turns around and presses a few keys before clicking on a track. The beat is almost mystical, like a foggy night. There’s a guitar that flutters throughout the song and I find myself humming the lyrics, trying to place them where I think they belong. 

RM smiles as he hears me, “That’s how we were thinking it’d go too.” I reply with a grin and we all bob our heads as I sing. There’s a few blanks that I couldn’t figure out, but I love the overall feeling the song is. 

“We thought of putting a rap verse in,” Suga says. “Of course.” I reply, since every K-pop song seems to have a rap verse. 

“We thought the rapper should be female, just to fit the sensuality of it.” Bang PD says and I let out a small laugh. Sensuality. That seems to be all it is, most of the time. I’ll explain later.

My lips part slightly to release a small sigh, and I fiddle with my fingers, moving up to itch the back of my neck. “How about you, Suga?” I ask. The boy turns around in his spinny chair, his posture curved. “Uh,” He looks to Bang PD, “I don’t see why not.” PD-nim nods slowly, almost thinking to himself.

“That…could work.” he mumbles and gestures towards me. “Why don’t you go inside there and we’ll see how it all works out.” And I nod, heading into the recording room. 

JANUARY 17TH, 2012, 8:52 PM. It’s been nearly four hours we’ve been in the studio, and I lay back in my chair as Yoongi finishes his verse. “I think that one was it.” he says through the mic. Everyone looks towards me, “What do you think, Kanako? Was that it?” PD-nim asks, as if I was the one demanding we be here for nearly four hours. Yoongi, whose name I learned by RM and his casual calling of him, was the one assuring us we needed to do one take after the other. But for some reason, he only asked me to do very little takes when it came to my verses.

“Y-Yes, that was great. I think it’s good to call it a night.” I say, and RM gives the go to Yoongi which has him entering back into the studio. There is a subtle curiosity I get when looking at Yoongi, his mysterious and quiet demeanor made me want to know more. Is that too soon to think? I shouldn’t even have those thoughts. 

His rapping was undeniably good and it made me want to hear it over and over again. And over and over and over and over. Fuck. 

Everyone picks up their things and I reach for my coat until Yoongi grabs it for me. 

“Oh, thank you.” I smile and our fingertips graze each others as he passes my coat to me, causing a small hiccup in my stomach. We all bow to each other goodbye and I head out to my dorm, seeing the two boys heading into the other direction where the trainees' dorms were. I feel a sense of excitement, hoping I get to work with them again. With him again. 

I hear a voice behind me that makes me jump, “Hi honey.” the voice says. I turn around to see another producer, except this one was my boyfriend. I look around quickly to make sure the boys and Bang PD were out of sight before swinging my arms around him. I snuggle my face in his neck, trying to keep my balance since I’m on my tip-toes. I can smell his Calvin Klein cologne that’s been stuck on him since I’ve known him. It’s almost his natural scent at this point. 

I’ve been dating Haneul for nine months, all months being an absolute secret. He was the one who urged me to keep us a secret, and I obeyed. I wanted him, needed him, to the point I’d do anything for him. As long as I was his I would do anything. Most days I would only think of him, how can I please him, how can I make him happy? How could I change myself to be the girl of his-

“I heard you were recording with Yoongi and Namjoon today.” He says, his embrace loosening. His body morphs back from leaning down to hug me, to standing straight up. He towers over me, looking me in the eyes. I can already sense what he’s feeling. He’s not controlling, he’s just worried. (I know what it looks like.) 

I look down to my shoes, “Yes but it was just working. Nothing weird.” I whisper. His hand trails to my chin, lifting it softly. “Are you lying?” He asks. (He’s not usually like this, he’s just protective.)

“No, Haneul. I promise. I only want you.” I say as I meet his eyes nervously. I feel his fingers let go of my chin and he smiles. “I love hearing you say that.” He says. I attempt to laugh to break the tension but it doesn’t help. Sometimes he makes my stomach drop in a way I can’t explain, in a way where if I really thought about it, I’m sure it’d make me feel horrible. (What else is he going to think when you’re alone in a room with three men, it’s not his fault. It’s yours. Why did you wear this skirt today? Why did you thank Yoongi for giving you your coat? Wrong. Wrong. Wrong.)

Haneul reaches down to peck my cheek, trailing kisses down my jaw and neck. My eyesight gets cloudy and I manage to forget about that pit in my stomach. It’s just us. Just him and me, forever. And he wants me right now. That’s all I need. For someone to want me like I want him. His lips graze my collarbone before sucking for a moment and letting go. “Just wanted to remind you.” He teases, and I smile. (This is good. I deserve this.) 

My hand travels to my collarbone where the slight pinkness of a hickey lies, “Hopefully this doesn’t get any worse.” I joke. His eyes darken, “Maybe it’ll give those boys a reminder that you’re mine.” He says. (He still thinks something happened. He was in a bad relationship before me, he just needs to heal. I promise.)

“I should go. Someone might see.” I say before snaking my hand to caress his. He interlocks our fingers and gives me a soft smile. He slowly moves his fingers up to my face once again, this time planting his lips on mine. It’s aggressive, heated, making me inch a little backwards so I’ve almost met the wall. He’s always like this. Gripping my hair so he can control the way my head moves, moving so quickly I can barely keep up. He loves control. He feeds off of it. I know he likes that he towers over me, that he can lift me up or bring me down whenever he’d like. 

In more ways than one. 

NOVEMBER 12th, 2011, 8:23.

My birthday is slowly coming to an end. I have friends and a few people from the company who came to celebrate my birthday with me and we all sit at the restaurant, picking at the crumbs left while bursting with laughter. Everyone is of age to drink but I’ve settled happily with a fizzy sprite, attempting to enjoy the company of others. 

The whole time we’ve been at this restaurant I’ve been glancing at my phone, checking the time and texting Haneul when he’d come. Although we’re a secret, people only assume we’re just good friends. You and Haneul work great together. Was Haneul the producer behind that amazing song? Oh Kanako, you both are a dream team! They all say. But even with how good of a friend, boyfriend, whatever it is, he has yet to show up to my eighteenth birthday party. He told me he’d come, he told me had a gift for me, he told me he’d be here with me. 

He knows how hard it’s been for me to celebrate my birthday ever since my mothers death, how lonely and debilitating this day could be. How ever since recently I’ve refused to even talk about my birthday. Up until her death, I’d only spend it with her. She’d bake me the same German chocolate cake, give me the same kiss on the cheek, the same hug after I had blown out the candles. It was only ever us in our own little bubble. 

But now it’s been bursted. I’m reminded why I never do it. Even sitting at a table full of my friends they still feel like strangers. Nothing can compare to her. I though Haneul being here would make it easier, but he still hasn-

“Kanako! I’m here!” A voice says from across the room. My cheeks flush and my eyes widen. He wobbles over to our table, clutching a bottle in his hand. The hand that should be carrying my gift. Everyone at the table quiets and the silence is deafening. No one knows why he’s acting this way, why he made it such an announcement that he’s arrived. That he’s my boyfriend. 

But I know one thing for sure, he’s fucking drunk.

I sit up and clasp my hands together, “Okay everyone, I think it’s time to wrap up. I have rehearsal tomorrow.” I say quickly. Everyone's a little dumbfounded before muttering to themselves, awkwardly picking up their things. Some give me a quick hug and a happy birthday, others simply wave and exit the restaurant. This is so embarrassing. 

Haneul watches as all the guests leave. I refuse to make eye contact with him, fiddling with my wallet to place a good size of cash to pay for the dinner. He grabs my wrist, “Baby don’t do that, let me pay. It’s the least I can d-do.” He slurs, and the strong scent of alcohol lingers on his lips. And the perfume I'm choosing to ignore. I jerk my wrist away and look at him with venom in my words. 

“Don’t even touch me.” 

“Kanako…”

“Where were you?” I ask simply. 

He straightens his posture, his eyes glistening with something I’ve never seen before. “Don’t make me feel more like shit than I already do.” He says and hangs his head. 

“I’m not trying to.” I respond, placing my hand on top of his. He pulls it away, “No, you’re trying to make me feel fucking guilty. You always do.” He says and I shake my head in confusion and shock. “Haneul, you missed my birthday party. How is this my fault?” I scoff. He lifts his finger to point at me, his eyes hazy and his mouth ready to hurt, ready to see me crumble. 

“You always make me feel like a shitty boyfriend! If you don’t like it then don’t fucking be with me, alright?” He spits. How can he say this? I part my lips, ready to speak, but he’s quick to shut me up. 

“This is me Kanako,” His face gets closer to me, his breath caressing my face. His voice is almost a whimper, a plea. Like a child. “Who the fuck are you?” He breathes. I inch my face away from him in disbelief. 

I feel tears well in my eyes and scoot beside the table to escape him. “Yeah Kanako, leave! Go fuck some other guy.” He yells from our table and I hang my head in an attempt to hide my face. Anyone could recognize me, any worker could tell the tabloids what happened tonight. My twenty-three year old boyfriend yelled at me. Kanako, in a rocky relationship with her producer, leaves the restaurant in tears. I can see the headlines now. They flash in my head and I breathe heavily and push the doors to meet with the chilly autumn air. 

I speed walk away, not wanting Haneul to catch up with me, to make this any worse. I feel a burning shame in my chest, a heated embarrassment arises in my stomach ready to release itself in the form of chunky liquid. Instead I hide in an alleyway, falling to my knees and covering my mouth to muffle my sobs. This is the worst I’ve felt ever since my mother died. This feeling, this is so much bigger than me. It hurts my heart, it pains my stomach and all I want to do is to evaporate. 

I don’t have a single thought besides to hide my cries. Besides replaying the moment in my head over again, still smelling the soju on his lips and that fucking perfume. It has to be the end of us, right? This has to be my final straw. I can’t handle this any longer. The public shaming, the drunk insults, the control. My sobs sound loud and sharp, like a cat who’s been cornered. I hide my face in my palms, hearing footsteps beside me.

A single finger gently caresses my hand, and I uncover my eyes. “Haneul..please..” I choke out, unable to catch my breath. He crouches in front of me before taking me in his arms, my hands float on his back, knowing if I touch him, it’s me inviting him back. 

“I’m sorry, I-I’ll change. I promise, Kanako.” He says. My hands float there for a little while longer, my head buried in the nape of his neck, my cries much quieter and defeated this time. 

But, I touch him. I hug him back. I hold his cold, yet warm body in my hands. 

And I stay, for the apology. 

JANUARY 12TH, 2012, 9:15PM

We stay like this for a little, him devouring my mouth and his hand with a fistful of my hair. He moans into my lips and uses his other hand to press me into the wall. His tongue demands entrance and I let him, but my mind is still scared we’ll get caught. Haneul seems to mind much less than I do. 

His hand that was previously in my hair travels to my chest, torso, and then my skirt.

“N-No, not here.” I breathe. My eyes plead with him, but he has sin in his eyes. A part of me likes that he’s so eager to touch me, but another part…

“O-Oh, sorry!” A voice from the hall is heard. Haneul moves his hands away from me and we part our bodies, looking over to see who it was.

I see a familiar figure walking briskly, his back facing towards us. 

Yoongi?

click here to read more of this story!

an: the first chapter of cool about it. hope you liked it and thank you for reading!

[cutieeeszn]

Hobby’s to pick up:

Okay, if I’m being honest. I am very inconsistent with my hobbies. I end up dropping them all. But having hobbies and activities really help you in multiple ways. Finding new friends, learning new things, disengaging from electronics. (I see y’all) so here are a few hobbies to look into. Some of them ive tried/been trying to get into. And these are the ones I’m most consistent with. :)))

Crochet

Crochet or knitting is so calming. And really not that expensive. It’s simple to learn. And you can do it over playing some music. Let me know if there’s any crochet tutorial accounts you’d love to know!

Drawing

- ah. This one is simple. Many tutorials available. I’d say, begin with finding out your art style. Experiment. Go crazy. You can trace some drawings first, as practice. Slowly move on to actually drawing. And remember, be creative. Finding your own art style is so important and influences how good your drawing may come out.

Learning a new language

This one is fun. Duolingo…my best friend right now. I’m doing French. It’s a beautiful language, and after a while of learning French. (3 weeks) when I’m listening to songs I can understand some parts. I also find it so entertaining comparing them to English words and how they link. 21 days forms a habit. So, doing duolingo. Kind of an habit now.

Embroidery

Again, calming. It’s beautiful to see how the images end up. And it’s more fun when you draw your own images. Really cheap I believe, varying from where you’re from. But making pillows, frames and little pieces is so lovely with embroidery.

Writing/ Poetry

This one is good and interesting as a hobby, personality trait. And for your mind. Training your brain to express its thoughts in different words, sequences and hidden under other meanings. Is so beautiful.

Digital scrapbooking

My instagram is filled with these. Actually, I only have one post. But it’s a digital scrapbook. Using CANVA and 17v28 to make these scrapbooks are so fun. Not messy, and so easy.

Dancing

Not only does it look snazzy. Dancing has so many health benefits. Hip Hop to ballet to jazz. Now I think about it, I miss being a dancer.

Reading

Be a book warm, have no shame about it. Really. Let me know if you want some book recommendations. Books take you into another world, let you view things. It’s trust beautiful when you find the right kinda book.

Creating a tumblr blog

I just started this. It’s fun though. That’s all I can say.

Fashion Designing

I sewed a shift dress. Well, kind of. It’s so fun making clothes. Although, fashion design was a school subject. It’s very fun to do. You can remake clothes at home. Turn an old skirt into a shirt. Go crazy. (Btw, when you take classes you start noticing fashion design features in your clothes. I noticed seam allowances, overlocking.)

Learning to play an instrument

I’m guilty of picking and dropping instruments. Currently, it’s guitar for me. I was really good at clarinet, and eh and piano. But now, I’m going back to guitar. Learning and instrument has many benefits. Study wise, talent wise, im pretty sure mentally too!

Normal Scrap Booking

Same thing as digitally. Just pulls you away from the screen ;)

Photography.

Capture those moments. Cherish them. Post them. Print them. Annotate them. Write about them. Just capture them.

Sincerely,

bliss5tar.

[elderberries-and-honey]

hey idk if youve answered this but whats ur writing process like? im think of doing a story like decades challenge but ive never anything outside of gameplay really. also how far in advance do you plan is it like this gen or gens in the future? sorry for rambling

Hello! First, you don't ever have to apologize for rambling to me; I love a good ramble! And second, if you're wanting to do the decades challenge, I suggest going for it! It has really helped me find a medium to channel my love for writing and learn history along the way.

To answer your second question of how far in advance I plan, I do plan multiple generations at once. I have a basic outline from 1890 to the mid 1920's already planned out, and this includes Ozzy, Atticus and future children and most of the side characters as well like Beth, Millie and Valerie.

As for my process, it's a little more in-depth and I use a website called Milanote for note taking and tracking birthdays and Google Docs for a bigger spreadsheet and writing the story.

Sometimes I have the full scene already written out in advance, but most of the time, it will be few sentences to get the juices flowing or something I wrote down at a different time. I write small things all the time, like little pieces of dialogue, or a good prose that I don't want to forget.

I personally need to see what the scene will look like before I write it out. Mostly because if I write something, and then can't find a pose for it, I get frustrated. So I shoot the scene first, edit the photos, put them into a Tumblr draft, and then finish the writing with the photos there for me to look at. Lately, I've been taking a few photos and then the rest of the scene comes to me while I'm shooting, so I stop taking photos and write it down before I forget.

Anyway, once all the photos are taken and the first draft is finished, I copy and paste what I've just written into my Google Docs. From there, I let it do it's grammar / spell check thing (mostly because I have it set to British-English so I want to catch American spellings of things and change them for me), reread it and put it back into the draft on Tumblr.

After that, I read the scene outloud back to myself. This helps me catch any weird grammar errors that the computer missed, or any repetitive use of a word & then I replace them (I have an extension that looks for synonms for me). I also just feel reading it outloud back to yourself, helps you read it like it's a story vs you just like...saying what's happening, if that makes sense? Like if I'm finding myself bored just by saying it outloud, it will probably be boring to read.

I do this multiple times over before I decide I'm satisfied, and I usually do it one more time before I publish the post. After I like what I've written, I copy and paste that back into my Google Doc because I consider this "my hard copy".

There is also a lot more organization that goes into it than just this, so if you want to know how I organize things, I'd be happy to explain that as well. It's a lot of spreadsheets and notetaking, but you don't have to do that if you don't want to.

And, this is just what works for me, I can't stress that enough! Other people write the scene before they shoot, and that's perfectly fine too. My process has changed overtime and it's taken a bit of trial and error, but this is just what feels the most natural for me.

I hope this helps somewhat and isn't too overwhelming. You can always do more gameplay than writing if that's what works for you, or build a story with gameplay. So don't let this scare or intimidate you! Either way, good luck with your decades challenge!

[kasshole69]

truly, madly, deeply - 2

Pairing: Wanda Maximoff x Reader, Wanda Maximoff x Natasha Romanoff, (eventual) Natasha Romanoff x Reader, (eventual) Wanda Maximoff x Natasha Romanoff x Reader

Summary: You’d been living a good life, well as good as it could get with how full of lies it was. Why? It was the only way to get by when you were an unmated omega with an uneasy past. That's all flipped on its head when you see a matching soul mark on two certain avenger, leaving your lies to crumble right in front of your face.

A/N: okay so now this is where stuff happens lol. i crossposted this on ao3 under the name kasshole and it felt like it got really big just overnight so ill probably post there first (also im not very good at using tumblr) whoop whoop anyways on to the chapter!

chapter 1 chapter 3 ao3

Your two friends rushed you to the hospital as fast as they possibly could. What the hell happened? Yeah, lately you hadn’t been feeling good, but when did it get so bad that you were passing out? Brooke carried you into the hospital doors, and a couple nurses rushed over to ask what happened.

“We don’t know! She was having trouble walking this morning, and then doubled over in pain and completely passed out.” Lexi explains, and Brooke gently sets you down on a bed that a nurse had gotten ready.

One of the nurses had paged a doctor, who made their way over to ask a few questions. “How long has she been feeling pain?”

Lexi shrugs empathetically. “We aren’t entirely sure, but she’s been missing work every now and again these past 3 month. It just never seemed this bad.”

“Alright. We are going to take her back to do a few tests and see what’s happening. One of the nurses can lead the two of you to the room she’ll be staying in,” the doctor said before taking two nurses with him further into the hospital.

After about 2 hours, a nurse came back to your room for the time being, pushed your unconscious self in your bed, and hooked up an IV and heart monitor to your body. She stated that the doctor would be coming in after he got the test results.

You looked terrible. Lexi and Brooke had seen you sick before but never to this extent. Your skin was as pale as paper with deep purple bags under your eyes. It genuinely looked like you were on death’s doorstep. Little did they know that you were.

The doctor entered the room with a solemn look. It was hard to reach a conclusion with you still being asleep, but all the tests lead to one answer. Touch Deprivation, common in omegas who have unknowingly met their soulmates or have lost their soulmates. Without proper care it will only get worse, eventually turning fatal.

“Seeing as you stated that she has been in pain for about 3 months and hasn’t gotten much physical contact in that time, we don’t have a lot of options. Do you know if she’s come into contact with her soulmate? Looking at her medical records, it doesn’t seem like she has met them yet,” the doctor explained, giving Lexi and Brooke a hopeful look. If you had met them, all they needed to do was find them and they could start the recovery process.

Lexi and Brooke felt a sense of dread overcome them. Was this because you knew who your soulmates were? Did they unknowingly help you nearly kill yourself?

“As far as I know she hasn’t met them, but she does know who they are,” Lexi says in a small voice, feeling like she is betraying your trust.

“She does? Is there a reason she is avoiding them? If they are abusive we will keep a close eye on them while they are here.”

Lexi looks down at her feet. “It’s not that. She just… she didn’t want to meet them. Her reasoning made sense at the time but now…”

The doctor frowns. “Well, do you know who her soulmate is?” —————————— You could feel yourself starting to wake, but moving felt like such a hassle. Honestly, you can’t remember the last time you weren’t woken up by an outside source; whether that be your alarm, your roommates, or like more recently; searing pain. It feels like it’s been ages since you’ve been this comfortable; covered in a warm blanket, laying on a warm pillow with deft hands lightly combing through your hair. Wait, hands?

Before you’ve completely processed that thought, you're instinctively pushing yourself and the assailant off opposite sides of the twin sized bed. You hear them let out a yelp, clearly not expecting to be thrown off, and you hit the ground hard. Sitting up, you take in your surroundings and realize you’re in a… hospital? You follow the cord of the IV in your arm to the connected bag and blaring heart monitor right next to it. You can hear your attacker get up, looking around to find you. You back up, heart racing, before they finally face you, and you see one of the last faces you were wanting to see.

Wanda Maximoff.

She looks at you with a shocked, concerned expression, saying something you don’t pay any attention to because of the fact that one of your godforsaken soulmates is right in front of you, and has been coddling you in this tiny bed for God knows how long. Right as you’re about to say something, the door to the room flies open. Three nurses and a doctor, all with frantic expressions burst into the room, taking in the scene until they see you sitting on the ground. Once they spot you their tension seems to dissipate, and the doctor takes a step towards you.

“Oh, thank goodness. It was just a false alarm,” presumably referring to the still blaring heart monitor. “Glad to see you're finally awake, Kass,” the doctor says, helping you up from the ground while a nurse went around the two of you to turn off the heart monitor.

“What happened?”

“You were brought here by your roommates yesterday morning when you passed out,” the doctor answered.

Passed out? You hardly remembered yesterday morning, it felt more like trying to remember a dream than something that actually happened. And this happened yesterday? If this happened yesterday then-

“I have work! Do they know I’m-“

“From my knowledge, your roommates have contacted your workplace and have been handling everything you might have missed.” Hearing that, you let out a relieved sigh. Lexi and Brooke are handling things for you and you couldn’t be happier. God, you had no idea what you would do if you were alone.

The doctor takes out their clipboard full of important-looking papers. “Now to get on to exactly why you're here. After you were brought here, we ran some tests while you were unconscious. From the results and the testimony from your roommates, we deduced that you are suffering from touch deprivation, which can be fatal in some cases.”

Shit. This was the last thing you expected it to be. You know for a fact you hadn’t accidentally met one of your soulmates before today and seeing as you spent so much time with Lexi and Brooke, this never seemed like a possibility. How did this happen? Was it a mental thing?

The doctor continued saying, “Seeing as the pain got so bad that you had passed out from it, along with the fact that your roommates said this had been going on for at least 3 months, without having gotten any treatment this was becoming fatal rather quickly. If we weren’t able to find one of your soulmates so fast, we wouldn’t have been able to do much for you.”

You had looked at Wanda, who was looking rather timid and was unable to make eye contact with you, not at all looking like the fierce and unforgiving alpha the media painted her to be.

This was all too much, you had nearly died and for what? For your freedom? Look at where that got you, the exact place you didn’t want to be. You put your head in your hands, trying to fight back the tears threatening to spill from your eyes. Everything was going to change now, you would have to move in with the Avengers, probably quit your job with how far the compound was from the city. You hated this, being unable to control the changes that were being thrust upon you.

The doctor must’ve been able to sense your distressed pheromones telling you, “You have been making stellar progress as you’ve been asleep, you certainly aren’t in as much pain as before, correct?” You looked back up and slowly nodded. “Fantastic, the steps to recovery are rather simple, you and Wanda will be staying here for another day or so, or until the pain is completely gone. The two of you will need to make physical contact as much as possible, whatever form that takes is up to the two of you. Also scenting is known to ease the pain as well, or marking, which is known to relieve the pain immediately.”

“Um, I think I’ll just stick to physical contact, thanks. Is there anything else?” you asked, hoping to get a second to process everything.

“Not at the moment, some nurses will come back in shortly to do a check up and bring some food. Is there anything you need from me?”

“Nope,” you quickly stated. God, how you just wanted some peace and quiet, already feeling a headache start to fester but now you questioned whether it came from your annoyance or from your recent diagnosis.

“Alright, I’ll come back later to check and see how things are going. If you need anything let one of the nurses know,” the doctor said before him and the rest of the nurses left the room, leaving just you and Wanda alone once again.

The two of you stared at each other for a long minute, seeing who would break the ice. You were giving the alpha a cold stare, clearly making her uncomfortable seeing as she was giving you the same timid look whilst anxiously shifting her feet. You quickly got bored of the intimidation, turning around in the bed to lay down facing away from her. You hear her move but don’t realize how close she is until you can feel the bed dip from her taking a seat right next to you.

You freeze up, stopping yourself from wanting to move closer since the painful tingling was starting to come back and she was the only thing that would relieve the pain.

Wanda takes a deep breath before softly saying, “I’m sorry this is happening to you.”

Sorry? Why is she sorry? You both know she played no part in this happening to you. She doesn’t even know you, so why the hell should she care?

“Yeah,” you state coldly. You do not want to talk to her, you don’t even want to think about her. There were so many thoughts swirling through your head right now. Thoughts about why Wanda is here. Why did she come and help you? What’s in it for her? Thoughts that just keep contradicting each other. One part of you wants to get as far from Wanda as possible, while the stupid omega part of you wants her to get impossibly close because she just smells so good and having her hold you felt unbelievably nice. You had too much pride to just give in like that though, so even though it hurt you didn’t move.

She speaks again, “I’m glad you're getting better. We were all worried about you.”

“Why?” you say in the same tone as before.

“What?” Wanda asks, clearly confused.

“Why were you worried? Why do you care?” you say as you sit up to face her. You stare at her confused expression with a scowl.

“I- um, because you're my soulmate?” she says, even more confused than you. You knew she was going to say something along those lines and it did nothing but piss you off.

“So? You don’t know me! I could be a criminal! A murderer or, or, something! Why would you save someone you don’t even know?” you nearly yell at her. It pissed you off to no end. Why would she help someone let themselves get to this point? Someone who wouldn’t even take themselves to the doctor so as to not damage their pride.

Wanda’s face scrunches up in anger and comes back at you with the same amount of force, “What difference does any of that make? I would’ve helped you whether you were my soulmate or not, but it’s because you are that I was able to help you! Not only that, but it’s kind of in my biology to want to help you!”

“I don’t want your help!”

That seemed to have struck a nerve in Wanda because her face didn’t hold anymore anger, replaced with sadness as she seemed to shrink in on herself. Looking at you with confusion and grief, “Why?”

“Because I don’t know you! You might be fine with helping whoever, but I’m not fine with whoever helping me, especially not with the kind treatment I need!”

If your first statement didn’t hurt Wanda, this one certainly did. She looked down, fiddling with her hands. She looked like a kicked puppy. Maybe it was the omega side of you that was making you feel this way but, you couldn’t help feeling guilty looking at her. You could understand why she was upset to an extent, not only was it just pure instinct that made her want to care for you, but helping people was what she did for a living.

“Sorry, I just-“

“No, it’s okay. I understand,” she says as she looks up at you with a solemn smile.

Before either of you can say anything else, a nurse comes in with a tray of food. Wanda had moved to a chair near your bed so as to not be in the way of the nurse. She gives you the usual check up, making sure everything looks normal and noting the amount of pain you are in and giving you some medication to help the recovery process go a little bit faster. The nurse asks if you need anything and leaves you to your meal. It’s just a bowl of chicken noodle soup and a chocolate chip cookie, which you are glad for since you weren’t super hungry when you woke up. Although, this was a much more difficult task than it should be. You can hardly pick up a spoonful of the soup without your hand viscously shaking. Just as you're about to give up and just eat your cookie, Wanda moves to get up before sitting right back down.

You look at her with furrowed brows and ask, “What?”

She looks back up at you, “Oh-um, I was wondering if you wanted some help?”

You really don’t want to say yes, you want to be able to feed yourself without anyone's help. But you know you need to eat and that you can’t finish this soup on your own. You look back down at your bowl of soup and let out a small, “Yes.”

It’s easy to tell that she didn’t expect for you to say yes by the way she looks so pleasantly surprised. She comes over and sits on the side of the bed like before but slightly closer. You can tell she is trying to hide her smile but she is failing terribly. She grabs a bowl and leans in close, grabbing a spoonful of soup and guiding it to your mouth. You hadn’t been doted on like this since you were a child. Wanda was clearly enjoying this much more than you were, wiping the sides of your mouth with a napkin each time some soup dribbled out. While you weren’t enjoying this as much as Wanda seemed to have been, it admittedly felt nice. It was hard not to smile back at her when she looked so happy to be doing this and when you did her smile increased tenfold.

As you finished up the last of the soup you could feel yourself become drowsy but you knew you wouldn’t be able to fall asleep with the constant prickling on your skin. You watched Wanda take the bowl and clean up a little whilst you eat your cookie.

A flood of questions you did not know the answer to started coming back. Why was she cleaning up after you? What was in it for her? Why’d she look so happy when she was helping you? Why’d it feel so nice to have her help you? Could someone who felt so much enjoyment from helping you be that bad?

Would it really be that bad to let her help you?

It was so hard to find an answer to that question, feeling like the only reason your mind wants you near her is because of your genetics, not your actual feelings. You did not know Wanda Maximoff and from what the media thinks for her she does not seem like someone you’d want to be around. But if she was going to hurt you wouldn’t she have already? God. You felt like you had an angel on one shoulder and the devil on the other with your conflicting thoughts and questions about Wanda, and you couldn’t tell if the thoughts rooting for Wanda were from the angel or the devil.

Before you can start any more debate with yourself, Wanda turns back to you with a smile on her face and hands on her hips, looking proud to have helped. It took all of your willpower not to match her goofy grin. Wanda is about to say something before you let out a big yawn, closing your eyes and covering your mouth. She lets out a small giggle and you give her the stink eye.

“What’s so funny?”

“Sorry, I just- you're really cute when you yawn,” Wanda says with a giggle and smile.

That makes your face heat up a hundred degrees. As to not cause yourself any more embarrassment, you lay down in bed and face the opposite direction.

Wanda lets out a sigh before saying, “You're probably tired so you should get some rest and I’ll just stay in this chair. If you start feeling any pain again let me know.”

You can hear the chair scrape against the floor as Wanda takes a seat again. You can feel your eyes start to droop and desperately want to go to sleep but know from previous experiences that sleeping when it felt like someone was constantly pinching you all over your body was going to be a difficult task.

You were probably tossing and turning for 20 minutes before Wanda asked, “Are you okay?”

You let out a huff and start to grind your teeth. It’s not like you want to be in pain but how are you supposed to feel comfortable laying with someone you hardly know? Did you feel uncomfortable when you woke up though? She was so gentle when combing through your hair and she just smelt so-

“Kass?”

You look back at Wanda standing over you now looking at you with a soft but concerned expression. It feels as if the longer you look at her the more you want to be close to her, the more you want to be surrounded by her delicious scent. Without saying a word you turn back over and scoot further away from her, leaving enough space for her to slip into the bed behind you. When she doesn’t seem to get the hint, you look back at her and see her still standing there now looking confused with a small pout on her face. It is so hard to not smile at the cute expression she’s making, so you quickly turn back around and say, “Come on.”

Wanda then slips into the bed beside you and wraps her arms around you. You slightly maneuver yourself to get comfortable before stating, “Okay, some ground rules. No unnecessary touching and no scenting. Got it?”

“Got it. Anything else?” Wanda asks.

“Um, can you comb my hair with your fingers again? It, um, it felt nice.”

You can hear the smile in Wanda’s voice when she replies with, “Of course, sweetheart.”

Wanda’s fingers in your hair, her warmth and her scent fill your heart with such a warm sensation you can’t help but smile as you close your eyes and succumb to sleep faster than you’d ever had before.