#-that is typically worn by the gender of what they were assigned at birth?

[aethersspacetime]

Being trans and also feminine is so odd sometimes, like yes I'm a man, yes I'm also wearing a push up bra and a top that shows of my boobs if I'm going to be forced to have them until I cam get top sugery I'm going to use them as accsessories

[wxlfbites]

A Werewolfs Guide to Terminology - an update

Authors Note: Below is an ever developing glossary which will be used by a new, yet familiar, branch of the nonhuman community known as the were community. For all those who wish to distance or no longer associate themselves with the current alterhuman, otherkin and therian communities, respectively, this glossary provides ways of describing one's experiences and identities that are more reminiscent of the "old days". While terms used within all of these communities will be listed here, you'll notice they're written a bit differently, to distinguish between "new" and "old" variations. Any and all questions about terminology are welcome. Any terms coined by individual Were's may not appear in any official Were community glossary unless it proves to be a useful, popular term; we want to avoid as much micro-labeling, excessive coining and term hoarding as possible.

A

Animality - the experience or state of being an animal.

Awereness - when one comes to understand their nonhumanity/animality; they become "awere".

Alt.Horror.Werewolves (AHWW) - a usenet group created in 1992 to discuss werewolves and the werewolf genre, it became the birthplace of The Were Community when others began discussing their experiences with nonhuman identity.

C

Calling - feeling drawn to something, someone or someplace as part of ones nonhumanity, this could be used for a nebulous experience that one might not be able to label otherwise, a placeholder while one is discovering what an experience means to them, or a standalone label : "I feel the call of x" or "I'm having a strong calling toward x".

Clinical Zoanthropy - a psychological condition wherein one experiences delusions of being, transforming into or having previously transformed into a nonhuman animal.

D

Daemon - a thoughtform representation of someone's subconscious, inner thoughts, or soul which is given a name, animal form, gender and, in most cases, sentience.

Daemian - one who has a daemon.

Drop - to no longer identify as or with a specific identity for whatever reason; typically seen in the context of voluntary identities.

F

Flicker - one who experiences a nebulous or temporary identity which is often brought on by the consumption of some source material; the thing one identifies as : "my x-flicker" or "I'm flickering as x".

G

Gear - accessories, including jewelry, clothing, taxidermy, etc. worn to express and connect to ones nonhumanity and/or relieve species dysphoria.

Greymuzzle - an older, well respected member of the were community who has been active for several years; equivalent to an elder.

H

Hearted - the strong connection one feels to something nonhuman which may include an affinity for, relation to, resonance or familiarity with; the thing one feels a connection with : "I am x-hearted".

Howl - an organized gathering of Were's, typically in a physical location.

L

Link - a nonhuman identity that is voluntarily chosen or created; the thing one voluntarily identifies as or with : "my x-link" or "I link to/as/with x".

M

Mundane -  indicating those who are not part of any nonhuman community and do not consider themselves to be nonhuman in anyway, particularly those who do not know of these communities or who do not believe in them.

N

Nonhuman - someone who identifies as something other than human.

Nonhumanity - the experience or state of being nonhuman.

P

Pack - a tightly knit group of Were's who communicate regularly and function as a chosen family; may or may not have ranks.

Polywere - a Were whose identity is that of multiple separate species at once.

S

Shifting - when one feels more like their nonhuman identity at any given moment; refer to part two of this glossary.

Species Dysphoria - a type of bodily dysphoria (i.e. anxiety, distress, dissatisfaction) arising from the perception that ones body is of the wrong species.

T

Transspecies - one who identifies as a species that is different from the one they are assigned at birth; typically used only by those who are also transgender, experience species dysphoria and desire body modifications which may resemble medical transitioning to resemble their species more on a physical level.

The Were Community - the overall population who identify themselves as Were's.

W

Were - one who identifies as nonhuman, specifically as some creature or animal; this can be a physical, spiritual, psychological or mixed-belief identity : "I am a Were" or "I am a Were-x".

Werefeels - the feeling of being closer to or reminded of one's nonhumanity; sometimes triggered by an image, item or sensation.

Weresona - a character created by a Were member of the furry fandom, based on their nonhuman characteristics; for use in furry circles.

Part Two - Shifting

Astral Shift - a shift where one takes on the form of a nonhuman creature within the astral plane

Aura Shift - when one's aura changes to reflect their nonhumanity.

Berserker Shift - when one's animality takes over, characterized by loss of control or an altered state of consciousness.

Bilocation Shift - a shift where one's spirit leaves their body and takes on the form of a nonhuman creature.

Cameo Shift - a shift of any kind that is not representative of one's established nonhuman identity.

Dream Shift - a shift experienced in an unconscious state or dream, where one takes on the form and/or mentality of a nonhuman creature.

Mental Shift - when one experiences what they believe to resemble the mentality and cognitive processes of a specific nonhuman creature.

Phantom Shift - when one experiences non-corporeal body parts associated with a nonhuman creature.

Sensory Shift - when one experiences heightened or altered senses that they feel resembles that of a nonhuman creature.

Transformation - a physical shift which is acknowledged by the one experiencing it to be a hallucination.

[faemytho]

If you're not too busy, I need some LGBTQ+ related advice. I was talking to someone earlier today, and I mentioned the topic of transgender people. I gave an example of "just because someone has the chest and (other parts) of a female doesn't automatically make them a woman", but they said it didn't make sense. They're older than me, so they know what a transvestite is, and they told me their work involves understanding brain development, but they only think of this as an opinion, (1/2)

(2/2)not an identity. I don't want to accuse them of being a t**f, but I don't know how to prove my point without simply calling it intuition. As someone who was a she/her but isn't anymore, do you know how to/if you can help me/anyone else that can have this problem? 

-

(here’s a good post that debunks the ‘gender is in the brain’ myth)

Note that I am not a professional, nor do I claim to speak for all trans people, but I am a trans person and I have a lot of experience with other trans people (I think I can count on one hand the amount of cisgender friends I have). So here’s my essay. Clowning in the notes will get you blocked on sight.

Also I’m not typically an advice blog but sure, I can answer this. Your friend actually is spouting t**f rhetoric, but that doesn’t necessarily make them a t**f. They probably genuinely do not understand the difference between sex and gender. So let me tell you, there’s a huge difference.

Gender as it pertains to our biological sex is a social construct. In other words, “sex=gender” is an incorrect formula. It’s not true.

As far as gender identity is concerned, it’s important to stress the fact that feeling an inherent sense of ‘this is incorrect’ when a trans person’s gender is associated with their birth sex.... is not an opinion. It’s not a choice a trans person just decides to make, nor is it a choice they even can make.

Thinking from this standpoint through a logical lens, if trans people could choose their genders, they likely would not exist as “trans people” if they could just choose to be cisgender. So why do so many trans people exist if it’s all just “a choice”? Do they choose to be part of an oppressed group that has no set in stone protections (in America) so they can make themselves targets of discrimination so they can wallow in self-pity about how they’ve reached rock bottom because of how discriminated against they’ve been? Why would they do that, that’s stupid. That is what makes no sense to me. It’s illogical, so why would people choose to do it?

Because it’s not a choice. Sex and gender identity are not the same; they are far from it. It has been proven before and it can be proven again.You can’t chose your sex, and you can’t choose your gender identity either.

A personal experience of mine, I used to know a trans person who encountered a xenogender label they absolutely adored. It catered directly to their special interest, they said it was a fantastic label with a beautiful flag and a beautiful definition... but it wasn’t their gender. They wanted so badly to identify as this gender but they couldn’t, because it just didn’t match their gender identity. “It’s not me, no matter how badly I want it to be.” It would be just as bad as forcing themself (a trans person) to identify as the same gender as their assigned sex at birth. It wasn’t them.

And that was that. I’ve actually encountered several labels like that myself; where I just loved them to death but I couldn’t identify as them because they weren’t me. Because it would feel wrong if I just decided, “you know what? Fuck it! I’ll use this label!” It would feel just as bad as being forced to be a gender I am not.

Would I benefit from identifying as a man? The answer is yes, I would! We live in a patriarchal society, I would reap a ton of benefits by identifying as and presenting as a man. But I don’t, because the idea of being male is inherently incorrect to me. I can’t choose it, even if I wanted to.

I love the female label. I love feminine things. I love them a lot, but I don’t love them when they’re used to refer to me. I can’t force myself to be female, nor would I want to, because it’s not what fits; it’s incorrect. It’s incongruent with me.

Here’s a roughly paraphrased transcription from one of my textbooks:

Biological sexes are the genitals and sex characteristics one is born with (when those sex characteristics may not fully match up as entirely of the male sex or entirely of the female sex, that person is considered intersex). Gender identity is defined as one's innate, inner sense of being male, female, something other, or something in-between. Gender expression is how one chooses to present themselves to themselves or others, which includes their appearance, dress, mannerisms, and speech patterns. Gender expression and gender identity do not have to match.

Here’s something you can choose: Gender expression. Dressing in drag, for example! Let’s break this down.

Transvestism is the practice of dressing in a manner traditionally associated with the opposite sex. (Why do we associate clothes with specific sexes? Why have we given specific clothes a sex assignment? Clothes are clothes; they can be worn by anyone regardless of sex and it’s not going to change someone’s sex. If women can wear pants and suits, why can’t men wear skirts? It’s actually the misogyny and toxic masculinity, but that’s a whole other rabbit hole).

Your appearance, your clothes, your personality, and even the way you talk, those are all things you can consciously influence and change. Expression is something you can change, but gender identity is not. An identified woman in a suit is still a woman. An identified man in a dress is still a man.

Food for thought. An intersex person exists, and stands before you. How do you answer the question, “What’s their gender?”. It cannot be answered by applying the “sex=gender” formula. Their sex is intersex; they are not completely, entirely, or just male or female. If one is supposed to go off of biological sex, how then do you determine their gender?

Logically? The “sex=gender” formula holds no weight. It just simply isn���t true. Another example. We insist on giving non-human characters genders, even when there is no biological component to go off of.

Wall-E and Eve, for example. They may be male and female coded respectively, but they don’t have any biological sex; they’re robots! How then does the “sex=gender” formula hold up? There’s no “sex” variable to equal the “gender” variable. So then it stands to reason by this formula that as robots, they have no gender, yet we insist on calling Wall-E a boy, and Eve a girl. Why would we do that if we, hypothetically, intend to uphold the “sex=gender” formula? They have no sex, so why would we call them male or female?

Because “sex=gender” is not true. What parts you were born with do not define whatever gender you may end up being.

There is a desperate need to differentiate between the female-sex, the female-gender, the male-sex, and the male-gender. They are not co-dependent; and they can exist without “matching up”. They don’t even have to exist in a person at all; take me, I’m trans-nonbinary person and I use a ton of xenogenders, but male and female? Those aren’t me. Would identifying as one of those make my life easier? Sure would! But I refuse to live as someone I’m not; I can’t live as someone I’m not.

Your friend should also probably come to terms with the fact that there are 7 billion people on this planet. The odds of all 7 billion+ of us fitting into one of two categories? Statistically, very unrealistic. We are unique individual people, with our own experiences and our own thoughts and beliefs. Why wouldn’t our genders adhere to our individuality? Even our biological sexes don’t adhere to a binary; they live on a spectrum, and anything within that spectrum isn’t entirely male or entirely female! Our sexes are as individual as each of us.

My experiences with my body, and my gender, are going to be different than anyone else who may even use the same label as I do! That’s just how it is. Our sex does not define our gender. Our gender identities cannot be chosen. We are who we are, and that in itself is pretty unique.

[youreawizardharr]

Cradlesona Event: School Days AU

[the image used can be sourced here.]

Welcome to Milreth

Name: Milreth Academy

Location: Central Quarter

Emblem: Two Staffs Clashing

Motto: "Ever Progressing."

Headmaster: William Latton

Academy Hours: 7:30 a.m - 4:30 p.m

Office Hours: 6:20 a.m - 6:20 p.m

Lunch Hour: 12:30 p.m - 1:15 p.m

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My piece for the Cradlesona AU event

Tagging: @lovingsiriusoswald

The uniform below can be found right here.

The uniform Eirene has worn since she attended Milreth Academy as a first year student. She always wears the jacket during class hours, and takes it off during breaks.

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"Hold fast to dreams,

For if dreams die

Life is a broken-winged bird,

That cannot fly."

Basic Information

Name: Eirene Beverly Chapman

Age: 20

Date of Birth: July 9th

Bloodtype: AB

Gender: Female

Height: 5'3"

Weight: 127lbs

Occupation(s): The Classicists

Affiliation(s): Milreth Academy

Alignment: Neutral Good

Item(s): a lanyard with her student ID

Academic Information

Year at Milreth Academy: Second Year

Academic Club: House of Arts

Choice of Course: Art & Design

Major: Fine & Studio Arts

Degree Needed: Master's Degree

The Overview: The coursework of a studio and fine art degree typically focuses on the branch of art students choose, such as painting, sculpture, illustration, animation or performance.

Favorite Subject(s):

Reading

History

Literature

Language Arts

Least Favorite Subject(s):

Mathematics

Science

Grade Point Average: 3.8

Academic Credits: 390

Studying Habits:

Eirene prefers a quiet enviroment to study for exams, complete homework or class assignments, practicing with drawing on paper, painting illustrations.

She sometimes organizes study sessions for upcoming exams or class projects (to which she deems important for social interactions, boosts friendships, and helps others in areas they have a harder time with). Eirene usually studies with almost everyone, but studies with Harr and Loki mostly.

Eirene has an exceptional memory, so she doesn't have to write down everything she needs to do or to get.

Her sleep schedule varies at nighttime, mostly because of projects, assignments, writing essays, or exams.

She makes sure to eat healthier snacks.

Student History:

Eirene received a perfect attendance award for never missing a day, or being marked as tardy for being late to class.

A painting she did of the garden in the Civic Center was auctioned at a museum for an extremely high price.

She has wrote several short stories which were published and sold at bookstores across the Central Quarter.

Student Life:

Eirene doesn't have much of a social life, meaning she isn't the partying type, and likes to spend her time wisely by being productive than some of her friends.

She loves going to Milreth's enormous library, but avoids the cafe because it gets overly crowded during exam days.

Eirene enjoys taking long walks or jogging along Milreth's huge courtyard.

Whenever inspiration strikes, she loves drawing, writing, or painting whatever it is that catches her interest. Eirene usually submits these pieces for classes.

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Relationships

Harr Silver ;

Harr is a third year student at Milreth Academy. However, he and Eirene are taking two completely different courses. With Eirene having chosen art & design, majoring in fine and studio art, where as he's taking a course on engineering, majoring in architecture. The two are constantly busy, but always find the time to spend together.

Eirene leans forward, continuing to run the tips of her fingers through black tresses. "Hey, Harr?" Her inquiry is murmurered, but the man in question hears her, humming to confirm he heard her. "Want to come over for a study session? You can bring Loki along, if you feel uncomfortable being alone with me." Harr opens his visible eye, staring up at his girlfriend of two years. "W-What do you need help with?" He looks away from her, a blush blossoming onto his face. "Are you having problems with math again, Eirene?"

She stops playing with his hair to stroke his reddening cheek. "You know I've never been particularly talented with mathematics, Harr. But you seem to have no issues with figuring out complicated math problems, am I right?"

The third year student sat up, shifting to address his lover. "I can help you in areas you have the most trouble with. If I have issues with drawing and maping things out, I know you will help me. We balance eachoth--- Eirene cuts him off, pressing her lips against his. Pulling away, she smiles happily. "You know I'll do anything for you, right, Harr?"

Loki Genetta ;

Loki is a first year student at Milreth Academy. He decided to take a course on business, majoring in business management & administration, minoring business sales. Loki wanted to take a course on business, so that he can work closely with Harr. Hoping that, when the two of them graduate, they can open up their own business in Cradle.

Eirene and Loki always hang out together on weekends or through group study sessions. If Harr is too busy, Loki will help Eirene with her standardized homework, and even allows her to practice drawing illustrations of him and watch her paint them, afterward.

Loki procrastinates completing his work alot of the time, making Harr lecture him about the importance of his education and that working hard will pay off once he graduates, even reminding Loki about them opening their own business in the Central Quarter, which inspires Loki to complete his work.

"Loki, have you completed your homework?" Harr inquired the pink haired teen, scrubbing a filthy dish with a soapy sponge. "Have you even started your class project? You know, your paper is due next week." Loki silently toys around with his unfinished dinner, causing the tips of the fork to scrap against the glass. "Eirene is writing my paper. And before you start nagging, she offered to write it for me. She said she wanted to practice writing, so I agreed in exchange for doing her math homework for her. I hate writing, you know that. I believe this is fair."

Harr rinces the plate once he finished scrubbing, setting it down in the dish rack. "Your education is important. I've told you this countless times. Both of you should be doing the work yourselves, so that you can learn to accomplish in areas you're weak in." The third year student grabs another plate to scrub. "Do you want to open up a business with me once you graduate from the academy?" Loki stood up from the table to scrap leftover food into the trash with his fork. "I do want to open up a business with you, Harr. I thought this course would be fun, but it's not fun. There's too much work involved." A sigh escapes from Harr. "Loki, you have to work for what you want. Life isn't going to hand everything to you. If you want to open up a business with me, work hard to achieve it. I will support your dream."

Loki ran up the stairs to his room, the sound of the door slamming shut echoing throughout the house. Harr returns to washing the rest of the dishes, making a mental note to lecture Eirene at a later date.

Seth Hyde ;

Seth is a third year student at Milreth Academy. He decided to take a course in art & design, majoring in fashion & apparel design. He wants to be a fashionista, and expand his experience in the fashion industry of Cradle. Seth is confident in his ability to design fashion wear for women.

Eirene and Seth met by accident one afternoon (during break, to be more precise), becoming good friends with one another.

"You made a mistake." Eirene pointed out, gesturing toward the mistake Seth made. The man let out a shriek when he noticed the mistake. "How can this be?! I was certain I drew the curves correctly!" Smiling, Eirene takes the artbook from him, using her own pencil to erase the mistake and correct it. "No worries." She handed the drawing book back to him. "My name is Eirene Chapman."

He grins, placing the artbook down beside him. "My name is Seth Hyde. Want to be friends, Eirene? We can bond over artwork."

The two of them mostly hang out during breaks, sharing their drawing techniques, offering advice about improving styles, etc. Seth and Eirene brainstorm color palettes, and Seth watches Eirene paint his designs.

Jonah Clemence ;

Jonah is a third year student of Milreth Academy. He decided to take a course in art & design, majoring in drama & theater art. He's confident with his performances on the stage, and wants to be a famous, talented actor of Cradle. Eirene met Jonah when she was tasked to help set the stage for an upcoming event the academy planned for.

"This goes against my aesthetics." Jonah remarked, taking Eirene's artwork and throwing it on the floor of the stage. "Make it better." The second year student kept her mouth shut, feeling her eyes sting with unshed tears. Seth came up besides Eirene, picking up the scenery illustration she made. "What do you know about aesthetics, Cling of Hearts? I believe Ei did a fantastic job painting this piece. Do you know how many hours she's worked on it?" The fashion designer scolded the young actor. "Do you?"

The Queen of Hearts scoffed, regarding Seth with disdain. "No, but I don't care. Everything has to be perfect for this play, since I have the lead role. Second best is not an option."

Eirene forces a smile, reaching down to pick up an opened can of paint. "You think my work is second best? I put my heart into everything I draw, paint, and write. If you wanted someone better, then you shouldn't have wasted your time asking for MY help." She dumps all the paint on Jonah, throwing the can off to the side once there's nothing left, storming off the stage, leaving a shocked Seth and an angry Jonah behind.

[arethesewritingtips]

Writing Trans Male Characters (from the perspective of a trans boy)

Okay, so for this to work, it’s going to get a little weird.  I have to talk about my personal experiences and talk about things that I don’t experience.  My experience is not “one size fits all,” and this will mostly apply to trans boys.  If you can twist it to fit trans girls accurately, go right ahead, but I would still advise consulting a trans girl first.  This could also work for non-binary characters if you want it to.

To start, I will be talking about trans acronyms.

FTM - Female to Male (trans boy)

MTF - Male to Female (trans girl)

AFAB - Assigned Female At Birth

AMAB - Assigned Male At Birth

AGAB - Assigned Gender At Birth

With that out of the way, coming out as trans is never easy, no matter how supportive your friends are.  It’s best if you have your characters asking their friends for their opinions before going ahead and just coming out to ensure that they won’t be left in the dust (though, sometimes that will still happen.  I lost everyone when I came out.  Of course, that doesn’t always happen, but it is something that can really happen, so it is not totally unbelievable if this happens.

IT IS NORMAL TO HAVE DOUBTS ABOUT YOUR GENDER!! I start T in a little over a month and my name is legally changed. My family has been referring to me by my preferred (i guess now legal) name for five years and I’ve been out at school for four, going on five, and I still have my moments where I breakdown and I just want to retract everything I’ve said and just pretend to live as a girl and just deal with it because that would be easier than dealing with the internal struggle I have.

Now for how some trans boys **MIGHT** act:

They might look at boys to see how they walk. Personally, I don’t know how to copy it so I just walk normally, but I know a lot of trans guy who do follow to the best of their ability how some guys might act.

Binders: personally, my family was pretty accepting and always makes sure that my binders are being used correctly. I have a friend who had to gethis friend to sneak a binder into school for him so he could take it home. He kept it hidden between books so his parents wouldn’t find it. When they ultimately did, they threw it out. One of my best friends doesn’t wear a binder. His chest is extremely flat and doesn’t feel the need to wear one.

Hair cuts: my friend’s parents wouldn’t let him cut his hair, so he cut it himself. My parents were hesitant to let me do it, thinking I’d regret it, but it was before I was out. I know tons of people (I was an admin on an trans boy account on instagram and a lot of people DMed us about how to do it so when I say a lot of people, usually I’m referring of that) who would just tuck their hair under a hat. One of my friends shaves his head every two weeks and keeps it as short as possible, meanwhile I can go up to six months without cutting my hair. It all depends on how your character and their parents are.

Clothing: we tend to go for the boys’ clothes if we are allowed to. Aside from the occasional female fit shirt I have that still fit and I couldnt bear to get rid of, I only wear boys clothes (jeans, underwear, and sports bras being acceptions due to gym class, periods, and hips), as do all of my other trans guy friends. I am the most feminine out of all of us t b h.

Makeup: a lot of trans guys prefer not to wear makeup, but some will contour their face to look more masculine. I really love clear lip gloss or red lipstick. I haven’t worn it a year and a half, but personally, I love it. I also know some guys (including myself) who just use concealer on pimples or dark circles or something.

Interests: I have never really been one for sports and being asthmatic and not being able to wear a binder during gym, everything turns it off to me. I also don’t really like video games. I know maybe three trans guys who actually like sports (obviously more than three in the whole world do, but I’m just saying that I know personally). All of them like video games except for me. Some of them have more traditionally female interests: i.e. k-pop, art, one direction, etc, but that doesn’t make any of us less than male. Once again, depends on your character. It is 100% okay to have them being into jewelry and still being male. One of my friends for the longest time had a phone case with pink flowers. After he came out. Because he liked it. There is nothing wrong with that.

Interests pt. 2: now, something that has happened to me (in the past and recently) is my parents shut down what I’m into and gave me shit for it, saying it isn’t typically masculine, so there is a lot of pressure to be in the box. I purchased some earrings worn by cismale k-pop idols and my parents were judging me really hard. The first time it happened, I stopped doing nearly everything I could think of that could be categorized as “feminine” to appease my parents. I know a lot of trans guys (myself included) who really do try to force ourselves to be into things just because it’s labeled as “male.” There is so much pressure like that.

As long as your character has some sort of disconnect between their AGAB, they are valid as trans people.

That’s all I can really think of for now, but if you have questions or don’t think I answered anything in enough detail, message me either here or on instagram @ arethesewritingtips and I may make a part two.

[rapeculturerealities]

You might not know Sarah Baartman’s face, but you know her body.

Sarah Baartman — also known as Saartjie or the “Hottentot Venus” — was born in the late 18th century in the Eastern Cape (part of modern-day South Africa). She was brought to the UK with a ship surgeon who profited from exhibiting Sarah for the entertainment of the British public because of her steatopygia. This meant that she had excess fatty tissue around her hip and bottom area, spectacular enough to warrant her, well — a spectacle. She subsequently spent most of her adult life being exhibited as a caged freak-show attraction both in London and Paris, where she died and was displayed even in death up until the late ‘70s.

There are many details about the life of Sarah Baartman that are still either unknown or unconfirmed. This includes her birth name, her cause of death, and the extent of any agency she may or may not have had in the events of her adult life. A lot of us won’t even have even heard of her, yet her story bears a troubling resemblance to the experiences of generations of black women down the line. Sarah Baartman’s reality as an attraction to behold, gawk at, and prod at manifests itself today in every hyper-sexualized fetishist remark veiled as a compliment, and every depiction of my big black ass as either comedic fodder or the accessory of the moment.

Sarah’s story has always resonated with me as a young black woman with a pretty shapely behind. As a teenager especially, I was no Sarah Baartman, but I still turned heads. My developing body was the pink elephant in the room, creating tension that was exacerbated by my being both the youngest and the only girl in my family. Lewd comments from men on the street old enough to be my father went hand in hand with warnings and admonishments from relatives to not wear that skirt, or sit like that, or dance too provocatively. This seems to be a shared experience among black women growing up, and this hyper-sexualized lens from which the black female body is viewed is a major factor in how we are treated.

Sarah Baartman was one of many Khoi women who were visited by European scientists and coerced into undressing and displaying themselves to satisfy Europeans’ perverse curiosities. These scientists carried back with them the image of these women as primitive and sexually insatiable. This misconception has managed to trickle right down to the mouth-breathing creep at the bar who leers at us with suggestive confessions of “never having been with a black girl before,’’ then adopts this picture of our sexuality as primal, serving to further dehumanize and assign us the role of entertainer.

Charles Matthews, a comedian who lived in London at the time of Sarah’s station there, recorded his observations of visitors who came to view her. “One pinched her; one gentleman poked her with his cane; one lady employed her parasol to ascertain that all was, as she called it, ‘nattral,” he wrote. Documented interactions like these further justify the fury we feel when white people tug at our hair and paint their faces black on Halloween.

The white gaze of the black body, regardless of gender, has always been and is still very much entrenched in the idea of entertainment. What were minstrel shows without the large drawn-on lips and charcoal black skin? How much funnier is it when the loud and gobby black female character we’re encouraged to poke fun at in any comedic TV show is fat and often dark-skinned? This sense of awe over the black form reduces us to being spectacles rather than human beings, something you’d see in a museum, a freak show in Sarah Baartman’s case. When black people set boundaries on our bodies, asking white people not to touch our hair or ask about our skin color, what we’re trying to get across to people is that our bodies were not made for white entertainment.

If black bodies were seen as inherently sexual, then emulating blackness has been a way white women have played with their sexuality while remaining safe in their whiteness. We keep seeing white women in the public eye monopolizing the black female body to gain them cool points (see Miley Cyrus circa 2013 and Rachel “Transracial” Dolezal who, after being outed for pretending to be black for most of her adult life, has written a book, and is now the topic of a Netflix documentary, which can only serve to give her even more publicity.) White women in the public eye who go so far as to surgically enhance their bodies to adopt typical black features like large lips and big butts tend to become the poster girls for the “body of the moment.” Everyone wants “Kim Kardashian ass” because her body is an amalgam of the erogenous features of the black woman, but without all that “black.”

This is especially interesting considering the infamous #BreakTheInternet Paper photoshoot where, in an Inception-like multi-layered recreation, Kim Kardashian stood in as the subject of a series of images that originally cast black women in a highly fetishized light (one that photographer Jean-Paul Goude has reinforced with previous works and comments.) Long before Kim’s time, the images in question have often been likened to our very own Sarah Baartman. We can’t ignore Kim’s role as the modern Sarah, this time using her body to exploit modern society as opposed to society doing the reverse. But 10 points to whoever can guess the main difference between Kim and Sarah. Her privilege in being able to cherry pick the aspects of the black female form that enable her to commandeer her universal appeal so successfully (the butt, the lips, the racial ambiguity) puts her at an advantage that no black women are welcome to.

For those without Kim’s figure, there was the bustle, which was all the rage in 19th-century women’s fashion. These huge structures (often accompanied with padding) were worn as a way of accentuating the female figure and enhancing the posterior. This means that during Sarah Baartman’s time as a freak-show attraction, the very women gawking at the natural curves on her body would likely have been enhancing their own bodies to look like hers. The difference is that while these women were seen as fashionable for their manipulated forms, black women like Sarah were being treated like freaks. It seems like a black woman’s body is only desirable (not to be confused with fetishized) when a white woman is wearing it.

One of the saddest things about Sarah Baartman’s existence, besides her enslavement and objectification, is the absence of her voice in her own narrative. Everything we know about her has been recounted by the scientists, captors, and audience members who benefited from her circumstances. Her duty was to be seen and not heard. That’s still the expectation for black women today — think about how quickly white audiences rejected the political turn Beyonce’s music took. The booty-shaking, female empowering Beyonce with her universal themes of overcoming heartbreak was actually black all of a sudden, and this made people uncomfortable.

It is this attempt to silence black women that concerns me most. As troubling as Sarah’s story is, there are plenty of black women out there who enjoy being exhibited, whether they are models, dancers, or any other type of performer. The freedom we’re asking for involves being able to express ourselves and control our bodies without attracting harassment and ridicule.

Sarah Baartman was only returned home to be buried in 2002 — more than 80 years after her death. If there’s one thing we can take from her story, it should be the reminder that every inch of the black female body — her skin, her butt, her voice — belongs to the black woman herself. It is not your costume nor your plaything. It is her being.

[yourflygirlslittlegenital]

Transgender Day of Remembrance - Some thoughts

Well, some years ago I organised a Tdor demonstration in Berlin, Brandenburger Tor, legally, with fuckin cop protection (what an irony) and today it is also time to remember some things which are always coming between us activists.

If I want to talk about my discrimination experiences, it is always hard to find a language. I know which words are wrong and I also know which definitions are bad and wrong. This is a result of my discrimination experiences. And I want to use this.

So I don´t use the words “trans” and “cis” and “inter” anymore. My experience is that people assosiate the “right” things with them, the things that the media tells them - mentally disturbed ugly men who want to become women by starting to cloth and style different, strange gay people in coloured bad choosen outfits dancing with unicorns in worn out hillybilly 80s discotheques. Sometimes even I am associate this. You know, all this is not my style. It´s not my life nor what I want to become. I fley the “lgbtiq*” community because I made just worse and worse experiences there. Exploitations (of the discrimination and “outsider” experiences and “identity”), exclusions, foreign determination and other forms of hierarchies and disrespect seemed common there, the music was shite and boring and the “artists” mostly untalented, uninspiring and really bad in what they did.

I never enjoyed these “queer parties” doesn´t matter if it were these typical “homo parties” with terrible 80s sound and German pop folk music or these black leather and whip parties where half of the crowd was having these exaggerated kajal & mascare “designs” while praying for some catholic punishment and ketamine in front of some always the same sounding heavy dark electro/dark techno that was yet banned out of the real club discos for several years nor these “lalalala i am a sweet pink riotgrrrl with a guitar” singsangsong concerts with always the same riffs, paroles and attitudes. “We” weren´t really accepted there ... hell no. Worst were these hippsterish feminist parties where half of the crowd was wearing these boring “don´t beat me” glasses which I am calling “career glasses” where you have to discuss anything about what you “may” do and what not including to define yourself while boring nasal voiced radio music is played in the background and no action is allowed because this is attended to be “unqueer” and therefor ... sexistic and patriarchal.

Anyhow, my taste in music and style was always (made) a problem in these scenes and to different to them and their collective taste in these seemed always to be the evidence of a crime. So I quit these scenes. And their language.

Also my experience is that feminists never really show distance from “cuntists” which disguise themselves as “(terf-) feminists” just to exclude and mock other women for this or that physical attribute, a very sick and ugly form of repeating mistakes you suffered from yourself before. These cuntists, as also the big and never really overcome reference to the cunt as the “core of all feminine” in feminism passed finally to bring me far away from this little sweet pseudoposition called feminism. And I think its more a form of a mask/identity nowadays than a real position. Because most things regarding stereotype genders are nowadays so clear that no one needs to build an ideology or position around it. Sure, this is also a result of the painful process of mass mind assignment and the bourgeoise education technics, but sorry, I can´t take anyone playing the fulltime macho/machista OR feminist serious. Both positions are quite too exaggerated, dumb and unhuman because so many evil shit has taken place in the last time in the name of feminism (also, especially against wrong assigned, inter and trans and other disadvantaged ppl.) while beeing/acting as a macho / machista is a selfevident thing to be wrong, stupid and to avoid for thousands of reasons.

So I am doing my activism just with a bunch of friends who have the same or similar claims, ideas and fights - we are all aware of the fact that the word “trans” f.e. is not only poisoned by the media and nothing to take or even be proud of - it is yet wrong and derrogative in its meaning.

Take the chemistry of old greek language - if two things are “cis”, it means they are on the same side while “trans” means in f.e. a molecule that the second thing is “on the other side”. There is also ortho (next side), para (two sides away) and so on. But only cis means “both together”. Yet this shows how stupid it is to repeat calling yourself (a) “trans” / “transgender” / “transsexual” while not having any serious problem with the shape of your body. Accepting the word “trans” means accepting the ideology of the “right” and the “wrong” body and therefor the theory that you and you body (in general) would be a problem that has to be treaten as a problem. Fuck that.

This is f.e. one thing why I am not connecting really with most other activists anymore. Another is that many/most are believing in strange and often stupid things like that society would just reject them and their existance and human rights for beeing mistaken while ignoring the psychodynamics of power.

I am also fed up with activists who believe in a peaceful revolution for their rights and acceptance - as if Stonewall Riot and all the other important and necessary processes would ever have happened just in a painless and peaceful way - Come back to reality and fight with us, pls!!

Another thing is that we live in a state of permanent oppression, including violence, stigmatisation and taking away our life quality with that. You can hide from seeing this, but anyhow - I don´t want to lie about that any longer.

The media is a bullshit - this is why I don´t read newspapers anymore. All the propaganda and stigmatising articles about the “strange beings who change their gender and where born as a man” and so on, you find em everywhere and in every of these shitpapers, so I will run or find my own press or die without knowing perfectly what is going on. This culture is not my culture, it is cutting away my experience, it is cutting away my life, my style, my knowledge, my ideas and my sexuality - while sexualising me and my sisters in a stupid, ugly and unsuppotably exploitative manner.

I say fuck you to a culture, society that is defining itself as an integrative, democratic dialogue culture while it is in reality a fucked up senseless powerplay and projection of some bunch of poison-filled, stressed and greed controlled human shit disguised in either sexy dresses or boring suits told to be sexy and/or neutral. I am not a part of this and I will never be.

Every nation that has laws which force me to be described as “male” in official documents for being born with a penis can suck my dixk and suffocate. So I don´t want to be part of any state, group or collective that is going with the actual madness of genitalistic assignments - I want to fight for having a place without gender assignments - not at birth nor ever! No fucking laws no fucking “she was born as a man” articles, slander and wikipedia mockings! I am fighting for a place with clean without all walls and media full of this privilegued repressive hatespeech propaganda.

This fight is not a fight for human rights, a bit of respect or beeing heard - I want to fight for having my own territory free of cops, genitalistic media, ugly fetishistic chasers and doctors who shall tell me who to be and what to do and how to hate my body by law and claiming that reproduction is the essential thing in life while justifying laws which demand the permanent castration or other forms of mutilation of my body just to be accepted as a woman. I want to kill all people who are and were involved in this. And never again live in a society that justifies them and their work while telling anyone in the media they would be “experts” about what and who I am while I would be a “transperson”. No. Fuck yea.

Still looking for people having the same in mind. And in their guts. Sorry, you peaceful feminist and queer community embracing activists... but your “riot” is not mine.

I am just still living for revenge. And for a change. Not a repeat of the same walls, prejudices and clichees under the sign of “diversity” “rainbow something” or collective “lgbtiq harmony”. I am just a woman. Not LGFUILHSDLUKADZBKub and not even proud to be a woman. My rainbow -flag is a burning authority with a choped down head -flag, my diversity is the diversity of anyone. Not I am special - everyone is. So I refuse to be categorised as “a little bit different”. Fuck that. Don´t make me a stupid fool. All these representations of “queer” and all the other mainstream “deviant sexuality” bullshit just makes me vomit. I want to break down the walls - not to tighten them.

Also I want to tell my pain and fight to anywhere and not just to find it in a “rainbow corner” of some special nice magazine or in a “safe space”, so I don´t exclude from the mass and the people who don´t want to listen. It is a political,. necessary and social thing, just as the election of any government, the Arab Spring or the next 20 Mio trade of the Coca Cola Company is. And I have the impression that many other activists see this different. These are some reasons why I stopped to interact in ordinary activism. I know that I am not alone with that. But mostly no one is talking about it.

Today I dared to. My last suicide attempt is 8 years ago. I almost passed to die. And wake up in a hospital 3 days later. Especially the sexual herrassment and abuse of the psychotherapists I was forced to communicate with regulary just to be able to juristically change my legal name took away the most power I needed to survive in a world full of genitalistic hate, prejudice and normative propaganda of a culture that is defining itself by excluding, killing and ignoring us and our ancient sisters and brothers and their knowledge, language and experiences. Will they also iradicate us and our words and images? Like our ancestors?

This is what and why I am fighting. At the moment it still seems to be a real small minority within a small minority fight. But I don´t give up now anymore. Read more about our small activist group in

http://antigenitalistischeoffensive2013.tumblr.com/post/64452337251/about-genitalism-and-our-mission

&

https://stopgenitalism.tumblr.com

[heart-of-real]

                                              Inner gender

     1.   https://www.quotev.com/quiz/6202119/What-Is-Your-Gender

What Is Your Gender?

Demi(gender)

Based on the answers you have selected, the gender that could suit you is demi(gender). Being demi(gender) means that you identify with the sex you were given at birth, but not on a strong level. This means that you could identify as male or female, but how strongly differs from person to person. Being demi(gender) means that you are a demigirl, or demiboy. Depending on how you feel about your gender, you could use a variety of pronouns. Depending also on how strongly you feel towards your gender, you might choose to use the male or female pronouns.

     2.   http://www.playbuzz.com/gregs/what-gender-should-you-actually-be

What Gender Should You Actually Be?  

Female

No matter what gender you were born, you sure think like a female! You have a big heart, an open mind and you don't mind making the harsh decisions for the betterment of the people around you. You are creative, emotional, spiritual and gifted in every area you choose to explore. Like the great Beyoncé once said - girls run the world!

     3.   http://quizdoo.com/what-is-your-true-gender-mix/?r=5q188

What Is Your True Gender Mix

You are 50% Male and 50% Female. You are an even balance of masculinity and femininity. You are strong and confident and equally compassionate and in touch with your emotions.

     4.   https://www.allthetests.com/quiz33/quiz/1473010602/Which-Gender-Are-You

Which Gender Are You? - Test results 

You are: An ultra-feminine! You are definitely in touch with your feminine side. All things ''girly'' are your domain from shopping to romantic movies. You look and act like a true lady. 

     5.   https://www.arealme.com/what-is-my-true-gender-quiz/en/

Mental Gender Distribution Female Tendency ratio: 68.0% ♂: 32.0% ♀: 68.0%

     6.   https://www.blogthings.com/whatgenderisyourbrainquiz/results/?result=73

Your Brain is 73% Female, 27% Male 

Your brain leans female You think with your heart, not your head Sweet and considerate, you are a giver But you're tough enough not to let anyone take advantage of you! 

     7.   https://www.idrlabs.com/gender/test.php

Gender Role Test

Your scores:  Masculine 19%  Feminine 64% Masculine: Very Low Feminine: Average This makes you Typically Feminine.

      8.   http://www.selectsmart.com/FREE/freeResults.php

Your Complete Results:

Female : Your inner self is the base female. Your optimism is sometimes misconstrued as idealism. (90%)     Male : Your inner self is the base male. You're decisive and enjoy being active. (10%)    

     9. http://www.playbuzz.com/keirabutler10/what-gender-is-your-soul#eightieth

What Gender Is Your Soul? 

50% Feminine, 50% Masculine

Your soul is a pleasant balance of masculine and feminine energy. This means that not only are you able to provide others with emotional support, but you also feel valued when your achievements are recognized and appreciated. Thanks to your unique ability to maintain the harmony between the genders, you’re able to handle life’s ups and downs efficiently and are great to have around during times of crisis. Not only that but, you’re capable of mature love that is fulfilling and passionate! You really are the best of both worlds!

     10.   http://home.earthlink.net/~ralsobrook/mlfemale.htm

Are you male or female? 15 - 28: Congratulations, you are a female.

     11.   ttps://www.quotev.com/quiz/6616241/What-is-your-gender-identity

What is your gender Identity?

Demigirl/Demiboy Being either a demigirl/demiboy mean you're okay with the sex you were assigned at birth, but not strongly. i.e, you can be feel more like the opposite gender, but not strongly enough to want to be the opposite gender. You might be right in the middle.

     12.   http://www.thefemininewoman.com/are-you-masculine-feminine-or-neutral-a-quiz/

What is your sexual essence – Masculine, Feminine or Neutral?

Scores :   A 11   B 2   C 2 If you answered mostly As, your sexual essence is more feminine. If you answered mostly Bs, your sexual essence is more masculine. If you answered mostly Cs, your sexual essence is more neutral. If you have 12 or more As, then you are highly feminine at your core. If you have 12 or more Bs, then you are highly masculine at your core.

     13.   http://www.funquizcards.com/quiz/fun/result.php?quizid=158&optno=1

Are you more feminine or masculine? You are more feminine than masculine.

     14. https://www.quotev.com/quiz/411287/Is-your-personality-more-masculine-or-feminine-in-nature

Is your personality more masculine or feminine in nature?

Feminine Congratulations ! You're feminine. You probably prefer passive activity over rough and/or brutal ones. You like the pretty side of life and enjoy being a gentle flower. Don't be ashamed that society sees you as weak. You have a power that your masculine twin could never possess. you're not mindless! 

   15.   https://www.blogthings.com/areyoumasculineorfemininequiz/results/?result=68

You Are 68% Feminine, 32% Masculine 

You are in touch with your feminine side. Sensitive, intuitive, and caring are all words that describe you. You tend to go with how you feel. You trust your intuition. And you're just masculine enough to relate to both men and women. 

   16.   http://www.playbuzz.com/samanthajones11/are-you-subconsciously-transgender#eightieth

Are You Subconsciously Transgender? 

33.3% Trans, 33.3% Female, 33.3% Male

You're subconsciously an even split of male, female and trans! You're a unique and complex individual who has masculine and feminine sides and has struggled with their gender identity. You're male, female and everything in between! You don't fit into the boxes that society tries to put us all in and you're bored with the old, worn out labels of gender and sexuality. You're a truly queer personality with a unique perspective on life, gender, and sexuality. Be proud of your differences and never let anyone else tell you to be something that you're not!