#12 through 15

[somethingsgottasaveyou]

Mayday Parade // 12 Through 15

[macravishedbymactavish]

| Blog HQ | Series Masterlist | Modern Warfare Masterlist | 18+ MDNI |

Alex's Version

TW for major miscommunication, heavy angst, end of a long term relationship. He wants kids & marriage. GN!Reader, no use of Y/N

"Marriage?" You repeated, making a face like the world alone was venom on your tounge.

The two of you were lounging on the couch, watching some movie he'd always want to see. The protagonists sharing in a passionate kiss, newly engaged.

"You're telling me you wouldn't want that?" He asked, heart sinking as you shook your head. Clearly disinterested in the idea altogether.

"You do?" Call him old fashioned, but he imagined himself one day watching his love walk down the isle. Imagined his house to be filled by small giggles and toys. Imagined he'd be laying in bed alongside his spouse and kids telling bedtime stories in silly voices.

"Yeah. Marriage, a house, kids, the whole shebang." He shrugged, swinging his arm out vaguely. Consciously reminding himself not to make a face during such a topic. "You don't?"

Movie now paused and forgotten, the two of you untangled from one another. Sitting on opposite sides of the couch; your features shaded with pain. Realizing the stark difference between your intentions for this relationship.

His face remained stoic. After years of training, and being within inches of death, and loss he learned to keep his expression neutral.

You'd known and loved him long enough to see right past his walls; you knew his tells.

His eyes shined with a bizzare mixture of hope and pain. Hoping his love for you would be enough as he grieved the loss of the life he planned.

Loving you would just have to be enough.

Every morning he'd remind himself of this, voice still thick from sleep as he whispered the words. Heart swelling when you reciprocated them, pulling him close for a few more minutes in bed.

Loving you with every ounce of his being worked to patch up the cracks in his soul for a handful of months. Pushing down the grief he felt, thinking of all the things he wouldn't get to experience.

For you, he'd give it all up. Loving you would just have to be enough.

Even through the long deployments, and contrasting goals for the future - your relationship grew. Lives became more intertwined. Signing a lease on a new condo, discussing what are dealbreakers in a house.

He even toyed with the idea of asking you to keep him company until forever ends. Even if it would be unofficial.

Loving you was enough.

"So, when are you two going to be chasing your own rugrats around?" His best friend, Nate asked one night. Smile dropping as he got a half hearted shrug in return.

"They don't want that," Alex sighed, taking a swig of his drink to avoid his friends concerned gaze. "The idea of kids, marriage and the old school traditions aren't us."

They aren't you.

Shaking his head, drink now placed on the railing of the deck; Nate scoffed, standing up. "Since when is that not you? That's all you've ever wanted since the day I met you!"

Biting his lip, eyes cast down as Nate ranted on. Baffled at the idea that his friend was giving up dreams he'd had since high school!

"I love them, and relationships are about sacrifice. Give and take. I gave in on the idea because they make me happy. Loving them will have to be enough. It is enough. " Alex fought back, frustration burning in his chest.

"Will have to be enough? Do you hear yourself?" The other man countered, lips pulled back in disgust. "You're losing yourself. That's not give and take. That's give and get nothing in return"

The night ended shortly after that, a bitter goodbye and silent drive home. The skin over his knuckles taut, fading into a stark white as he replayed Nate's words over and over.

He had no right saying any of that. He doesn't know your relationship. He doesn't love you.

"What's going on?" You asked, eyes wide as the door slammed. Eyebrow arching when you got a frustrated grunt in response. Watching as your boyfriend passed by you without a word.

Jaw locking and relaxing, he slowly turned to face you. Pushing down all the pent up emotion as he stepped forward and pulled you into his chest. Holding you tightly, as if your presence alone would soothe his mind. Would remind him of the future you two held.

As if your presence would help him grieve the loss of what could have been.

The coming days and weeks weighed on his heart and mind. The tight embraces, loving words and passing kisses providing temporary relief from the ache within his heart. The seed of doubt that Nate had planted continued growing below the surface. Thick roots growing and constricting, darkening what was once golden.

Thinking of Nate, he realized they hadn't spoken a word since the fight; radio silence for weeks on end wasn't a new occurrence. Radio silence following an argument , however, was.

Maybe he had a point.

Blinking hard, he pushed the thought out of his head. No. Loving you WAS enough.

You were his endgame, marriage or not. Nobody else knew him quite the way you did.

Nobody else would slip their arms around him and bury their face into his back when he was upset and in desperate need of extra love. Nobody would immediately remember where he dropped his keys off last when he had been searching for 10 minutes. Nobody would understand the inside jokes created on sleepless nights.

Nobody would be what you are to him. Nobody would be who he is to you.

"What's going on?" You asked him one afternoon, leaning against the doorway as he finished trimming his facial hair. Looking at you in the mirror, eyebrows raised, he shrugged.

"Seriously, you're acting off. I want to make sure you're okay." Biting the inside of his lip, he busied himself with grabbing a towel and drying his face. Making an active effort not to tense up when you rested a hand on his bare shoulder.

Playing the words over in his head, picking apart the sentences for anything that might cause offense he softly began. "I'm not saying you haven't made any sacrifices; you have. So many, and I owe you the world and everything in it."

Lip caught between teeth as he debated dropping the topic. Continuing to love you and the life he currently has, show that he's willing to sacrifice for your relationship too.

"I'm sensing a but, and a loaded one at that." You trailed off, pulling your hand back. Expression saturated with concern.

"But why is marriage the sacrifice you draw the line at? I can accept never raising children together, I can get over my parents not getting grandchildren from me. But marriage? A commitment between us to love the other person until our last breath. The one thing I want more than anything with you." Eyes now squeezed shut, internally cursing for how his voice broke halfway through.

"I've told you, I don't believe in marriage. I love you, I will always love you. Why do we have to bring the law into our relationship for it to be 'official'?" The airquotes around the word, and your calm demeanor broke the roots surrounding his heart. Allowing the internalized grief to spill.

"Because I'm giving up all my aspirations! I want kids, I want grandkids. I want to be married and live out our golden years in whatever house you want. I want to tell people you're my fiance, then my spouse. I'll even take your last name, if you'll give me this one thing." Voice raised, arms out to his sides as he studied your face. Begging, pleading, hoping to find any sort of remorse.

Instead you were unreadable, staring silently at him as he carded fingers through his hair. Shaking his head as he rushed out of the small bathroom. Grabbing his shirt from the foot of your shared bed, ignoring your protests from behind him.

Agony so loud it portrayed itself as anger. Tears streamed down his cheeks as he kept walking. Grabbing his phone and wallet off the counter before you managed to get in front of him.

"What? I don't want to get married to anyone and you leave? What the hell is going on, Alex? This isn't you!"

"It isn't. This life isn't me." He sighed, feeling pathetic. Hands shaking as he mustered up the courage to continue. "You can have the place, I'll find somewhere else and help with rent for the first bit if you need."

His gaze set to the floor, avoiding the pain in your face.

"I thought loving you was enough. And it is, except that we're at a fork in the road. Ending with you stuck in a life you hate, or I lose pieces of myself along the way. It's not fair to either of us, I want you to be happy. I want to continue being happy." He cleared his throat, ignoring how tight it got as he watched tears leave tracks on your cheeks. Lip quivering with sobs you held in your lungs.

Reaching a shaky hand out, you slipped your fingers through his. Clearly relieved when he shifted to hold your hand fully. His other palm resting on your cheek as he pressed a firm kiss to your hair, body shaking as he pulled away.

"I'm going to cool down for an hour; probably hit the gym or go for a run. Then we figure out our arrangements here." He nodded, sliding his thumb over your cheek as you sniffled.

When you nodded in agreement, he dropped your hand and made his way outside. Mind racing as he pulled his phone out of his pocket.

[Man with a Plan]

[Me]: Turns out, you were right.

[Nate]: Shiiiiiiit, I'm omw

General taglist: @bloodonmyhands-1221 @v1naco @bowtruckleninja

Alex Keller taglist: @glitterypirateduck @deadbranch @gcing-back-to-505

[englishsub]

book rec by me

so you want to get back into reading books but have no idea where to start and disdain booktok (if you get me started on this however i will become an unskippable cutscene so that's for another day). understandable. there is so much out there and it is all so overwhelming and you don't even know what you like now that you've been a decade out of the game. again, understandable. it does not have to be scary. i will help you. below i have created some categories that can get you started.

i want to read Literature

literary fiction, with crossover from historical fiction and magical realism

PEACH BLOSSOM SPRING by melissa fu

THE VASTER WILDS by lauren groff

THE FAMILY CHAO by lan samantha chang

OUTER DARK by cormac mccarthy

SEVERANCE by ling ma

LIGHT FROM UNCOMMON STARS by ryka aoki

IDENTITTI by mithu m. sanyal

PIRANESI by susanna clarke

i want to read sci-fi/fantasy that won't break my brain

sci-fi and fantasy that is gentler on the brain cells. easier to grasp magic systems with multiple but not an overwhelming number of overlapping plotlines

EMILY WILDE'S ENCYCLOPAEDIA OF FAERIES by heather fawcett

KINGS OF THE WYLD by nicholas eames

THE JASMINE THRONE by tasha suri

THE CITY OF BRASS by s.a. chakraborty

A RIVER ENCHANTED by rebecca ross

JUNIPER AND THORN by ava reid

BLACK SUN by rebecca roanhorse

THE FINAL STRIFE by saara el-arifi

THE BONE SHARD DAUGHTER by andrea stewart

i want to read sci-fi/fantasy that forces me to lock the fuck in

i would not recommend picking these up as your first foray back into books after many years of not reading recreationally, but i'm not your mom.

THE SPEAR CUTS THROUGH WATER by simon jimenez

JADE CITY by fonda lee

THE FIFTH SEASON by n.k. jemisin

THE RAGE OF DRAGONS by evan winter

A MEMORY CALLED EMPIRE by arkady martine

GIDEON THE NINTH by tamsyn muir

THE ART OF PROPHECY by wesley chu

THE GRACE OF KINGS by ken liu

horrify me!

there is far more to the horror literary canon than stephen king and dean koontz, i promise. consider looking up warnings for these.

TENDER IS THE FLESH by agustina bazterrica

THE RUINS by scott smith

CONFESSIONS by kanae minato

EPISODE THIRTEEN by craig dilouie

REPRIEVE by james han mattson

MARY by nat cassidy

DEAD SILENCE by s.a. barnes

AUDITION by ryu murakami

THE SALT GROWS HEAVY by cassandra khaw

don't care, i want romance

some of these feature crossover genres, like fantasy and horror.

VAMPIRES OF EL NORTE by isabel cañas

DAUGHTER OF THE MOON GODDESS by sue lynn tan

SEVEN DAYS IN JUNE by tia williams

HAPPY PLACE by emily henry

ONE DARK WINDOW by rachel gillig

i want QUEER romance

again, a mix of historical, fantasy, and contemporary crossover genres.

WE COULD BE SO GOOD by cat sebastian

IN MEMORIAM by alice winn

MOST ARDENTLY by gabe cole novoa

A STRANGE AND STUBBORN ENDURANCE by foz meadows

A MARVELLOUS LIGHT by freya marske

THE EMPEROR AND THE ENDLESS PALACE by justinian huang

SPELL BOUND by f.t. lukens

SORRY, BRO by taleen voskuni

ONE LAST STOP by casey mcquiston

DELILAH GREEN DOESN'T CARE by ashley herring blake

i haven't felt anything since i read percy jackson/the hunger games in middle school/high school

adventure is still out there.

SCYTHE by neil shusterman

WE HUNT THE FLAME by hafsah faizal

SIX OF CROWS by leigh bardugo

GEARBREAKERS by zoe hana mikuta

i'll read anything that's not straight or white

many books in the above categories fit this, but here's even more, across a variety of genres.

LAST NIGHT AT THE TELEGRAPH CLUB by malinda lo

BABEL by r.f. kuang

WHEN THE RECKONING COMES by latanya mcqueen

THE UNBROKEN by c.l. clark

IF YOU'LL HAVE ME (graphic novel) by eunnie

LEGEND OF THE WHITE SNAKE by sher lee

THIS IS HOW YOU LOSE THE TIME WAR by amal el-mohtar and max gladstone

SHE WHO BECAME THE SUN by shelley parker-chan

"all ya books suck"

like any other genre or book age group, there are duds and there are standouts. ya is not special in this regard. try some of these!

DIVINE RIVALS by rebecca ross

STRIKE THE ZITHER by joan he

THE RED PALACE by june hur

A STUDY IN DROWNING by ava reid

EMPIRE OF SAND by tasha suri

LEGENDBORN by tracy deonn

i check out and read a lot of these books for free via my local library by using the libby app (you can even add your friends' library cards to gain access to libraries in places you don't live). when i'm feeling like reading via audiobook, i use libro fm!

look, no one HAS TO read diversely. no one is going to be reverse fahrenheit 451'd and locked in a room with no fanfic and only books and not let out until they work their way through the entire literary canon. but reading, and reading widely, and reading diversely, is what teaches people to form their own opinions and question the things they are told. it's why they hang up stuff like "READ READ READ!!" in grade school classrooms.

we live under systems that increasingly benefit from going unquestioned. no, of course reading ASSASSIN'S APPRENTICE by robin hobb is not going to dismantle these systems tomorrow, nor probably even in our lifetimes. but doing it will help set up a world capable of doing it in the future. and until further notice, we are all part of this wretched world. might as well read a good story while we're here.

anyway, i'm reading THE WEST PASSAGE by jared pechaček and the new cmq book this week.

[ask-shane]

your asks astonish me, but i realized theres only.. like.. 5 types of asks u get. so basically this is what i think ur ask box looks like rn:

anon1: haiii shane! luv u!

anon2: shane i hate you you look like you never shower you stink so much you filthy rat

anon3: shane ur so ugly i love you. ur such a cutie patootie. ur so pathetic. ur like the physicla embodiment of a wet paper bag. i luv u.

anon4: hi u have a nice ass :3

anon5: shane help my toilet exploded

basically what im tryin to say is that you dont get paid enough for this

i actually laughed out loud reading this.

you think i get paid for this? i wish i were… i’m not. i actually think my paycheck gets deducted whenever i log into this blog.

[gendrsoup]

when the headcannon you thought was canon compliant is actually directly contracting canon due to a tiny detail mentioned on a piece of paper shown in maybe 3 scenes 😔

[whump-on-a-string]

Based on that Ask about if it's Parish who usually patches up my blorbos. The answer is Yes.

Parish has been dealing with Dallan's tendency to run into unfortunate shenanigans for the past 10 or so years. Dallan would probably have died a long time ago if he weren't pals with/working for a very good elven doctor. Poor dude's got Chronic Whumpee Disease.

ANYWAYS. What really started it was a dinner party Dr. Parish and a half-elf friend attended at Mr. Richard's greathouse. Dallan was just the lil resident servant boy cinnamon roll who took their coats & stuff. The head maid wasn't a fan of how the half-elf friend was critiquing her methods of keeping her staff busy so she tried to play a bit of a prank on him by messing with his food that backfired horrendously and nearly killed Wolf (and littol babby Dallan by proxy because Wolf was sharing his snacks because look at him. He was just so smol and helpful and looked like he needed a lil treat 🥺)

Doctor Parish was furious.

[ducktracy]

i drew this in 2022 but never posted it for some reason. quick scribbly redraws of characters from Eliza Past... reference drawings are from when i was about 15 and 12 respectively. i liked cats

..................and still do since my girl Tyson is also technically a cat. slowly breaking the mold of how i draw my cat characters

[jamethinks]

I have a hard time hating Donovan because as much of an asshole he is to his son, that man has done nothing wrong in my eyes. I know the goal is to keep him as a mystery and a sort of looming threat but I’m not really threatened by the unknown.

He’s a dick to Damian but it’s never made clear why. The best assumption would be that he’s rich and therefore neglectful but that doesn’t seem to be the case with all the other kids at Eden. He just comes off as paranoid for again no particular reason. The most we know is that he thinks that everyone is inherently a bunch of liars which is a nice contrast to the main cast of characters and based on that odd conversation with Twilight we know that he extends this belief even to his own family. Unfortunately, I have a hard time hating him even for that because I’m the end Damian is like 6 and it just seems to logically insane to view a child as a potential opp that I can’t take it seriously. Also he never extended that kind of suspicion to Demetrius so I dunno maybe Damian is the problem.

As for his politics, they are effectively nonexistent. Only information that we know is that he maybe possibly would be interested in starting the war again but at the same time that’s not how war works. My best understanding is that he is trying to be re-elected to start the war again but if that’s the case then why would anyone vote for him? No context is given as to why he lost the last re-election (and that’s me assuming he lost and it’s not a case of term limits) or what the general public thinks of him. There was that one scene where Millie blamed him for the death of her father so maybe the gp isn’t too fond of him but it’s also never said why. As much as I am anti war I do know war is a nuanced issue so I can’t really say if I’m against Donovan without know why he is interested in the war. He didn’t even start the war also what even is the war. It’s constantly referenced but I don’t even know what they’re talking about. The timeline is so vague and confusing.

I’m nitpicking again but it’s really confusing. I get the upset about losing family to the war but wars are far too political and complicated for me to just side with anyone. Like I feel bad for veterans in general but also a lot of them are cold blooded murderers and rapists who proudly dedicated their lives to furthering white supremacy and engaging in neocolonialism so I can only feel so bad before I just say womp womp and move on. Brainwashing does seem to be an issue in Ostania but again like meh. They specifically said Ostania isn’t a socialist state which was the core of the conflict between East and West Germany and it’s the socialist/communist beliefs that caused the most harm in East German but if that not the case here then what is actually going on.

If you have any information that can help please share I am confused 🤔

Anyways here’s a tiny Yor

[2009kidcore]

Old AMV from 2014

[werewolf-transgenderism]

FINISHED MY CONFERENCE PAPER WITH EXACTLY 49 HOURS TO GO BEFORE I PRESENT IT.

[puhpandas]

I change how I feel about Gregory and Tony's relationship ten thousand times a day

[littlesilentrebel]

what happens to a demigods belongings once they die?

do they get burned with them? are they sent back to their family, if they have one? do the siblings take them? do these children have wills?

what about the kids with no demigod siblings? are no families? what then?

are there belongings that were once children of zeus and poseidon, still in their cabin for percy and thalia to find?

[macravishedbymactavish]

Various COD Characters x GN!Reader Angst

| Blog HQ | 18+ MDNI | Taglist Open | No use of "Y/N" |

Inspired by 12 Through 15 by Mayday Parade

Series TW for heavy angst, relationships ending (the COD character ending things). Specific warnings will be included for each version

I // Soap's Version

TW for heavy angst, allusions to cheating (reader cheats), ending of long term relationship.

II // Alex's Version

TW for major miscommunication, heavy angst, end of a long term relationship. He wants kids & marriage.

[coralsweep]

Orokapi eventually returns back to Tatsuno Yoriko her family.

500 words, gen, No Archive Warnings Apply. Written for Day 3 of @aftergodweek under the prompts for Tatsuno Yoriko and Minami Akio.

Yako retains unfamiliar permissions to the rest of those under Ahu'az.

700 words, gen, No Archive Warnings Apply. Written for Day 4 of After God week under the prompt IPO (gods).

[triangle-strategy-notes]

Quahaug Concept Art

Quahaug's concept/reference art! Translation notes and image id under the cut.

Translation notes:

"OP sort of powerset" was literally translated as something like "cheat-like." I feel like OP is the more common English term for that sort of thing, so that's what I used, but some of the meaning was probably lost there.

"Older-tween-ish" was specifically a reference to a particular middle school year for children who are about 12-13 years old. Since grades and names of grades vary a lot from country to country, I just went with "older tween."

ID:

[Image id: Several images displaying different parts of 2 pages of the Triangle Strategy artbook, with both the original Japanese as well as versions with English translations. There are several disclaimers noting that the translator doesn't speak Japanese, and that there are likely many mistakes.

On one page, there is a large colored version of Quahaug's canon portrait, along with a smaller, uncolored version. There is an illustrator's note at the bottom that translates to read, "'Manipulating time' is an OP sort of powerset, so though he looks like a child, I aimed to create a look for him that conveyed a sense of unknowable power. (Tatsuaki Urushibara)".

On the second page, there are many drawings of Quahaug, including a closer bust-up portrait in which he's compared to Lyla, with an arrow and label reading, "Mother." There's also several notes that explain the construction of his costume. The costume is labeled as a Greek "phelonion" (a priest's outfit with no real sleeves, just draping fabric). There is a small drawing of this version, with an arrow leading to another drawing that does have sleeves, with the note, "If you can't display this in pixels, use this one." There are several notes that explain how this draping cloth should be considered his everyday clothes, while the ceremonial decoration that goes around his neck is placed over it. There is a close up of the ceremonial dressing's fastenings underneath the metal decoration. Some more notes highlight details on his staff, emphasizing the hourglass on top and the small wheel to the side that can be turned to flip the hourglass. A larger piece of text underneath one fullbody drawing reads, "Character Who Manipulates Time."

On the second half of the second page, there are drawings of some beta designs for Quahaug. He looks much more punk-ish. On one bust-up portrait, there are the captions, "The burden of the time demon caused some of his hair to go gray…." and "All-natural highlighted tips." On the same portrait, he is snapping his fingers, and there's a note that reads, "Manipulating time is as easy as snapping your fingers. You just have to want it or whatever." A speech bubble near his head reads, "I don't think of Anna as a mother." A caption pointing to some green markings on his arm reads, "Demonic time seal on body." In a fullbody drawing of his beta design (which is made up mostly of chains that barely cover him as well as a long roughed-up cloak, there is the note, "Almost naked cloak."

At the bottom of the second page, there is another note that reads, "Initially when we hadn't quite figured out the setting, we had an idea for a more older-tween-ish character as displayed here, but after discussing it with the producers and Mr. Ikushima, we went with his current form. As a boy who manipulates time, I placed an hourglass at the tip of his staff, and his face resembles that of his mother, Lyla. (Tatsuaki Irushibara)". /end id]

[zazter-den]

If one more baby* likes my fics I'm gonna start breathing into a paper bag