#AND I have memory issues that lead to me forgetting what they mean or to use them and people can be rude about that

[theriverbeyond]

Ok so a part of the NtN epilogue that has always bugged me is how Alecto very specifically doesn't know who Harrow is until she bites kisses her and tastes her blood

Which on its own wouldn't necessarily mean much, except that Harrow is shown repeatedly to look almost exactly like Anastasia, and Alecto-in-her-aspect-as-Nona is shown to be very observant and aware of physical features. It's not, like, a vision issue, after waking up Alecto immediately recognizes Pyrrha, and knows the general features of Harrow i.e. "black-eyed infant". And in her aspect as Nona, she is keenly observant of physical features. She waxes poetic about all the little ways Honesty and Pyrrha's red hair differs from Kiriona's, and more than that, she immediately recognizes Kiriona's corpse as the girl from her dream. So why doesn't she recognize Harrow?

The other Lyctors recognize Harrow. The first thing Augustine says upon meeting her is: "Harrowhark the First—ninth saint, then, looking at you I can tell that’s appropriate", and then in the same scene he calls her "Anastasia come again." Mercymorn insults her ("You're not as pretty as Anastasia") but in that insult, she again emphasizes the physical similarity between Harrow and Anastasia. These statements are way more significant when you remember in this scene, Harrow has just woken up after travel through the River, and is still wearing a hospital gown. no black vestments, no Ninth Aesthetics, the only things really "Ninth" about her are her physical features.

And the first thing Alecto does after she realizes that Harrow is Anastasia's blood is to apologize about Samael and reiterate her "vow", which she specifically did not remember until after she remembered Anastasia.

So like. What does this mean? I cannot help but have a feeling that this relates to blood wards being broken by the blood of a relative, the Ninth House being the House of the Sewn Tongue, and the established fact that necromancy can fuck with memory and perception. I guess I had always assumed the original "sewn tongue" referred to Anastasia but like what if it referred to Alecto? And the established blood ward (the Tomb) could only be spoofed by a close relative (because John wouldn't program it to let anyone but himself in), but theoretically what is stopping Anastasia from whipping up a theorem for a blood ward that simply requires any kind of direct genetic link? Why would Alecto have forgotten her vows, how does this relate to Samael, why was she swearing allegiance to Anastasia? If she was made to forget because that vow was a secret, who was it kept secret from (John, presumably), and why, and how will this impact Alecto's motivations and actions in the next book? John seemed happy/relieved to see Alecto when she woke him up via sword-to-the-chest, but the Alecto he put to sleep (presumably) didn't remember her vows to Anastasia, and the Alecto who stabs him does, and what could this mean? How does this all connect to Anastasia's bones being nestled by the Rock on the inside of the tomb? Did Anastasia have a long term plan, or was she just hoping that the next time Alecto woke up that things would be Different? What could she possibly have hoped or assumed would have changed in that interim time? How does this connect to Alecto calling out for Anastasia right before John leads her into the Tomb? What HAPPENED between Anastasia and Alecto, and John, and Samael, and—(I am pulled off stage with a large hook)

[evergreenempress]

hot take for the Black And White Thinking website but you don't have to have a black or white opinion on tone indicators actually. they do in fact have good qualities and bad ones. yes they are another set of rules to memorize for some AND that's the way many neurodivergent people navigate social interaction already. yes some people don't understand or misinterpret them BUT they're largely unintrusive to the actual sentence so if you don't understand one you can... still read the sentence and ignore it. you can acknowledge that they help other people even if they don't help you. you can acknowledge that they are inconvenient or difficult sometimes as well as being helpful. it's okay

[jacaerysgf]

Unexpected Surprise

Summary: While attempting to gain the support of the vale, jeyne arryn has plans of her own for the prince.

r.q: Everyone forgets house Arryn😔🤘🏻 baddies of the vale Can you write something w Jace and an Arryn maybe lady Jayne’s little sister or daughter or something? Not a totally unreasonable alliance !! They have the coolest castle and knights also Ms Aemma Arryn ™️ like hello!! (I’m impatient as hell for more Vale coverage in season 2)

w.c: 900+

c.w: baela and jacaerys are not betrothed, arryn!reader jenye’s daughter, FLUFF, just a very cute fic, drabble, not proofread

a.n: IVE HAD THIS DONE SITTING IN MY DRAFTS FOR NO REASON OMGGGG but with the recent jeyne content i felt inspired to write this !! just something super simple <3 HOPE YOU ENJOY !! LOVE UUUU GUYS

masterlist - requests open

“Im sorry, what my lady?”

“I wish for you to marry my daughter.”

This is not how jacaerys thought this would go. When he arrived in the vale he thought he thought he would have to make simple small talk, present some of the benefits, hells even throw some complements her way in order to convince her. This however had not been in his cards.

“I'm sorry my lady i do not understand.”

“My daughter, y/n remains unmarried, around your age, a sweet girl, agree to wed her and me and my men will bend the knee.”

He blinks. He has no clue what to say to her. Jeyne stands after a moment, “I shall go fetch her.” He watches as one of the guards tries to stop her and tells her he will go retrieve the girl but Jeyne seems determined to go herself and he moves letting her leave. Jacaerys stands awkwardly in the middle of the room unsure of what to do.

He is not too sure he can just flat out agree to a proposal without his mother position, it is not like he is a second son, he is the heir to the queen. The next king, his wife to be the next queen. Yet when he sees you walking into the room, wearing a long dress in your house colors with your mother trialing behind with a pleased look on her face he finds himself wanting to agree to the marriage right away.

You are stunning. Easily the most beautiful women he’s ever seen, sure he hasn’t seen that many women but it doesn’t matter. He watches as you bow and mindlessly nods in acknowledgment, unable to take his eyes off you.

Jeyne looks between the two of you with a satisfied look. “Why don’t you show the prince around?” She gives you a pointed look to which you nod, “Of course i would be happy to.”

He walks over and offers you his arm with a smile on his face and you graceful take it before you begin to walk off with him. Jeyne stays behind and smiles to herself.

“My mother is very forward i apologize to you.” He simply shakes his head, he finds himself look at you instead of the halls he’s supposed to be looking at. “It is not an issue my lady, I rather appreciate it.” You look at him curiously but turn away once you notice he is already looking at you. “Whatever do you mean?”

“Many people speak in riddles, not saying what they mean or truly want, your mother is a rare gem.” You smile at the praise of your mother, “She truly is.”

You lead him outside and begin to tell him about the different plants and different sculptures around the courtyards. He is so charmed by you. The way you light up when you spot something and you begin to tell him of a memory you have, like how your mother scolded you for jumping around in the fountain, or when you almost fell out of one of the window's when you fell asleep.

“You truly love this place.” He can tell. The way you smile at the guards as they walk by or the way you know every detail about everything in the walls. But he sees the way you falter slightly at his words, “Am i wrong?”

You shake your head vigorously, “no no i do, its just i have never been away from here. My mother is a very protective woman, she waves away any suitors, she never even lets me leave the eyrie it is ridiculous!” You realize you're letting your emotions show too much and bow your head, “i am sorry that was out of line.”

He grabs your hands and you look at him with wide eyes. “I understand my lady, my mother is similar, i have truly never traveled to far, i wish to explore, once my mother has her rightful throne i believe i will take the time to see westeros a little bit,” He pauses before he speaks again, scratching the back of his neck sheepishly, “I could take you with me? if that is what you wish my lady.”

He watches as your eyes begin to glow and you beam at him, “truly? oh nothing would make me happier.” He nods and grips your hands tighter, “I shall take you everywhere.”

He does not expect you to throw your hands around his neck and pull him into a hug. He wraps his hands around your lower back, pushing his head into your neck and breathing in your scent. “I will accept your mothers propsal at once. You will fly with me to winterfell.” You pull back and give him an eager look. “Winterfell? Truly?” He nods, “I am to go meet lord cregan stark.”

You can barely contain your excitement at the thought of seeing something that was not the eyrie, especially a place as grand as winterfell.

Jeyne watched you two smile at one another from a window above with a small smile on her face. She does not hear the guard approaching her from behind, “You seem pleased my lady.” She says nothing to him for a moment, simply continuing to stare at the two of you. “Tell my men to ready themselves for war. It seems he will accept my proposal.”

perm jacaerys taglist <3

@tyronesien @itsbookworm987 @cruelworldlana @smurfelle @ireneispunk @hxtd @venmondiese @urmomsgirlfriend1 @aegonswife

[flowery-mess]

Swan Lake

Noah x ballerina reader

I will never forget the way I was feeling at that stage in front of all those people. My parents and siblings in first row, watching me with eyes full of tears and pride. I got the lead role in Swan Lake at the age of 16 which was seen as big accomplishment in ballet world. In that moment I felt happy, proud of myself and stronger than ever. But that didn’t last long.

Just a seconds after the big red curtain was closed and me and other dancers went in the direction of our changing room, I heard my name being called. Screamed, actually.

I turned around to see our trainer speed walking to me. I quickly went over the whole play in my head. What did I do wrong? I couldn’t think of anything, I felt good. She found million reasons to tell me I was a bad choice for playing the lead role, that I’m too fat and I won’t play on the next date.

That was it. That night I told my parents I’m done with ballet and I’m quitting immediately. My mother was ballet dancer too, we talked a lot about how hard it was for me lately, so she agreed with my decision and went to talk to my trainer. I packed my things and never saw that woman again. That felt like a big rock fell off my shoulders. That was 10 years ago.

-

“What are you thinking about?” Noah asked, his hand gently placed on my thigh as we were driving to my family home for Saturday lunch with my family.

“It’s 10 years anniversary of me ending my ballet career. I was thinking about it a lot recently.”

“Thinking about as?” he waited for my response as he didn’t really understand how I feel about it.

“As I miss it, I guess. I was thinking about talking with my mom about it today. Also I looked up some ballet classes in our area. But I don’t know, it was just a silly idea.” I shrugged it off.

I never really talked with Noah about my ballet career. I told him I did ballet for 14 years and quit for mental health issues. I mean, it’s very much known how the ballet industry works, so he understood. I have very mixed feelings about getting back into it at my age, so I haven’t told anyone yet.

I tried to stay healthy and fit, I sometimes go to open dance classes and sometimes I try some ballet steps. I still got it. I am a lucky one, I still have good stretches and I learn steps quickly. I just got bored of doing it only in our living room.

“Really? That’s not a silly idea, it’s actually a really cool idea. Did you find any good places?” I was surprised with Noah’s excitement. He is very supportive of everything I do, but I guess I expected different reaction.

“I like two ballet studios. They have some good teachers and also open classes, just for hobby attendance. One is on Mondays and the other one is on Thursdays, so I can try both and then see which one I like more.”

“Are you signed up already?”

“No, I am not sure Noah. It brings up lot of bad memories, 10 years ago it got me into a really bad place and I’m scared it’s going to be the same this time.” I felt tears coming as I thought of little 13 years old me crying through the whole night, because I was told I’m fat for ballet. That I’m not good enough. That I’m too tall to be a ballerina. That my skin is too pale. That I got in just because of my mother. That I’m never going to make it.

Those memories make me feel little and so vulnerable.

“I’m sure it will be great honey. If you miss it, then you should try it. But it’s your decision, okay? I don’t want to push you into anything. Take your time to think about it, talk with your mom and you will see what’s her opinion on this, right?” he brought his hand that was holding mine in it to his lips and placed small kisses against my palm.

“Thank you.” I shot him a smile which he gladly returned.

-

I loved days like today, spending time with my family. All of them love Noah, so after we have lunch, we are usually both separated and have conversation with someone else. Firstly, I talked to my siblings about college and their new internships, while Noah talked with my dad about new music and their upcoming Europe tour. My dad absolutely loves Bad omens and I am sure he is their biggest fan. When my family visits for shows, he never wants to be in the backstage, watching the show from safe space. He always goes in the crowd, which makes my mum crazy scared every single time.

I used this as a chance to talk to mom about the ballet thing that was going around in my head.

“Mom do you mind coming with me outside for a minute?”

“Of course darling.”

We took our coffees with us as we made our way to the garden and sit on the big couch that my parents had there for my whole life. That thing is going to outlive all of us.

“What is it darling?”

“What do you mean?” I tried to hide my worries, but my mom knows me too well.

“I know when my baby is worried about something. What is it? Is it Noah? Are you sad he’s going to leave for tour soon?”

“Oh no, well, yes that too, but it’s not the first time, that will be okay. It’s something I wanted to talk about especially with you.” I played with the cup in my hands and avoided the topic as long as I could.

“Come on hon, spit it out.”

“I was thinking about getting back into ballet.” I said and kept my eyes low, focused on the green grass. I looked up just because my mom wasn’t saying anything. “What? Are you going to say something? I don’t know what this face means.” I was honestly so confused with the way her face was looking at me. Was she happy about? Sad? I couldn’t tell.

“Well, I was expecting this much sooner than now.”

“What?”

“I always thought you will want to get back to it at some point in your life hon. You loved it. Aside from those ugly things, you loved ballet. I was so angry at that woman who ruined for you.”

“Why did you never say anything?” I was so confused. She was waiting for this for years and never talked about it with me?

“Because it’s your decision, not mine. I didn’t want you to think I was disappointed with you or pushing you back into it. Did you think of where would you start with classes? And would you want to take part in plays again?” She was right. It is just mine decision and with everything she saw me go through I understand she was worried.

“I found two studios near our home that look good. They have weekly open classes that I was thinking about. But I wanted to talk with you first about it.”

Then we fell into long dialogue about everything connected with be going back into ballet. My mom gave me a courage to at least try it. She said my eyes lit up when I talked about the good memories I had from my child age. She also told me that I am more mature than I was back then and even if I don’t think I can handle it, I can. And she was right.

I’m a grown woman now, I can handle myself and protect myself. It’s also just open class for everyone who wants to try ballet, there will be no judgement.

-

“I’m going to try it.” We left my parents house later than expected, so it was dark outside when we were driving back.

“The open classes? Did you talk with your mom about it?”

“Yes and she said I should give it a chance. So I guess I won’t be home on Monday evening.”

“Can I go watch you?” Noah asked.

“What?” I returned him a question, not knowing what he meant.

“I mean I never saw you do your ballet thing and you will be wearing those ballet outfits and I’m sure that will be hot.” He said as if it was obvious fact that I should’ve known.

“You’re not being serious right now, are you?” I tried to hold my laugh in at his innocent clueless face.

“Well I’m not, but I would really like to see your little ballet outfit for sure.” He turned his face to you so you could see his smirk.

“Sure, watch the road you perv.”

-

It had already been a month since I started going to open classes in the studio I chose after the first week. I chose the one closer to our home, their dance rooms were bigger and more modern and our teacher was a lovely girl, possibly my age.

And it felt amazing. It felt like I was alive again. Don’t get me wrong I loved my life with Noah, my work and everything, but this felt like the missing piece.

While I was changing into my clothes after today’s class, our teacher Molly came to talk to me.

“Listen Y/N, I know you said you have bad experience and memories with professional ballet, but we have few spots open in our semi professional group and I thought you’d be great candidate. I see you’re learning faster than anyone in your class and I’m scared you would get bored after a while. There will be auditions, but I can get a word in for you and see if you could skip them. Just think about it and let me know as soon as you decide please.”

That night I came running home to share that news with Noah.

“WHERE ARE YOU?” I screamed just seconds after I opened the door.

“Studio.”

When I opened the door Noah turned in his chair to face me.

“Did I do something?” he looked scared.

“What?”

“Why are you screaming and running, I’m scared I did something.” You let out a chuckle at his words.

“No, but I got news. Great news.”

“Let me hear them.”  I walked over to him and sat in his lap.

“I just got offered a place in semi professional group at the studio. Without auditions, Molly wants me there.”

“Honey that’s great news! That’s amazing news!” he stood up with me in his arms and spined us around.

“So you think I should accept that offer?”

“You haven’t already?”

“No, I wanted to think about it.”

“Judging by your reaction, there’s nothing to think about.” He smiled into our kiss.

“I guess I’m back on track then.” I kissed him back.

-

Long story short, I accepted Molly’s offer and started with my new group. I had classes 4 times a week, which was bit hard to get used to, but after while it was okay.

Noah left for tour, so at least I got something to do with my free time.

Noah leaving was also good for another reason. There is time difference between us, so we usually text each other or have short calls, so my worries are easy to hide.

Last week Molly told us that our group will be playing Swan Lake few months from now on, which brought back some memories. Semi professional groups still play in midsized theatre, I joined them when there wasn’t any, so I expected some play to come soon, but not this one.

I had mixed feelings about it, thinking if I want to play or if I just pass this one. Applications are closing in three days and I still haven’t applied for any role, which was weird for Molly.

She asked me about it after last class, so I told her about my ballet history, how Swan Lake basically ruined it for me. Molly is very positive person, so she told me something that got stuck in my head. She said I could take it as an opportunity and change Swan Lake from something bad to something really good in my life.

Truth is, I am thinking about applying for Odette/Odile, but I haven’t told anyone yet.

-

“Okay that’s enough love, what is going on?” Noah asked through the phone and I saw his forehead wrinkles were making his worried face. It’s scary how well he knows me, but with tomorrow being the last day for applications I needed to tell him.

“Our group is going to play Swan Lake in a few months and I don’t know if I should apply or not. It’s the play that made me quit.”

“Looks like it’s your second chance to make the best out of it. Listen, you were worried about even getting into ballet again and look at you now! I know you’re worried now, but wouldn’t you regret not even trying it?” I felt like I was on the phone with Molly right now.

“I know, I was thinking about applying for the lead role, I did it back then too. But maybe I should do other role?”

“Oh no love, if anyone is supposed to be the lead role in this play, it’s you.”

“You have to say this, you’re my boyfriend Noah.”

“Well wouldn’t you be the same if I was in your position? That’s what you do for your partner. You know how many songs would be forgotten and never released if you didn’t support me? There is lot of them I thought weren’t good enough, but you made me finish them. I may don’t understand ballet, but I understand you and I know you would regret not applying. So you get your ass up right now and fill what ever you need to fill and send it to Molly or I’m going to do it.”

And he was right, I would regret it. But I still couldn’t believe myself when I saw ‘send’ on my screen after I applied for Odette/Odile.

-

Molly informed me that me and 5 other girls applied for the same role, so there will be two rounds of auditions, first one starting on Monday, which gives me 6 days to prepare for it. Noah is also coming back home on Monday, so I’m happy I will share the outcome with him. Either we will celebrate or he will make me his comfort food and I’m happy with both options.

-

I spend the last 6 days going over the choreography for the first round of auditions. Everyday after work I went straight home and practiced. Last night I didn’t get a chance to talk with Noah, because he was already on his way back to the states. I at least talked to my mom this morning.

“Y/N you’re next.” I heard Molly from the ballet room.

-

“I’m homeee.” I heard Noahs voice that I missed so much. I left the pans on low heat and left kitchen to meet Noah in the living room.

I didn’t waste any time and went straight in for a kiss.

“Missed me much?” he managed to say between our kisses.

“Very much.” I looked at his face, tired face, and held it in my hands “Hi love.”

“Hi.” He leaned his forehead against mine as we enjoyed bit of silence and each other’s presence after month and two weeks apart.

“How was the flight?” I broke the silence, took his hand and led him into our kitchen to finish dinner.

“It was okay. I slept most of the time, but I’m still very tired. And I need a shower.”

“You can go take a shower now, it will take few more minutes until it’s done.” I pointed to the food.

“Okay.” Noah got up, left kiss on my nose and went to get shower. That’s what I thought at least. On his way to our bathroom, he realized I didn’t tell him about the audition.

“Y/N? Wasn’t the audition today?” it was, but I wanted to tell him about the result over dinner.

“It was, but I wanted to tell you later.” I tried to hide the smile on my face.

“You got through to the second audition, didn’t you?” he caught your smile and immediately knew the answer. “I guess we can celebrate right now in the shower huh? Are you going to join me?”

-

“So girls, I want to thank you for participating in this audition. It was hard to decide, but in the end, we agreed on one name. And it’s you, Y/N. We were amazed by your performance and we feel like your experience with this play could help us to make the best of it. Congratulations!” Molly gave me a hug and whispered in my ear that she knew it was going to be me from the beginning.

Noah and my mom said the same. My mom made sure she put date of the premiere in hers and dad’s calendar so they wouldn’t miss it. Noah also made sure to clear that day months in advance and welcomed me home with a flower and dinner as a celebration.

-

Breathe in, breathe out. And repeat. I stood in backstage already in my costume. I saw Noah and my parents in the first row as the rest of the room filled with strangers. Strangers that are going to be watching me in a few minutes.

“Are you ready Y/N? How are you feeling?” I felt Molly’s hand on my shoulder.

“I’m nervous, but also excited. I haven’t preformed for over decade, so I hope I don’t panic.”

“You’ll be great. We did lot of work, all of you will do great tonight.”

She then went to talk to other girls and I felt my phone buzz in my hand. It was Noah.

“Don’t be nervous, we’re very excited to see you shine tonight. You’ll kill it babe, I love you.” Oh my sweet Noah. Supportive as always.

-

I stood still in my pose as the curtain was closing. I let out a big breath I didn’t even realised I was holding in when the curtain was fully closed. I turned around to see my friends and in that moment we realized we just finished our premiere of the Swan Lake. And it was perfect. We did group hug, with Molly joining us. It was completely different than 10 years ago. This night was full of support and love.

I went to change into my normal clothes and then to meet Noah and my parents.

My dad and Noah both had bouquets in their hands and my mom had tears in her eyes. She was also the first one to pull me into a hug.

“I’m so proud of you Y/N, you can’t even imagine. You grew up into a beautiful woman and you just showed me how strong you are.”

“Thank you, mom, I couldn’t have done this without you.”

Then it was my dad who pulled me into strong hug. My dad didn’t show emotions a lot, so I appreciated him coming tonight.

I really wanted to literally jump into Noah’s arms, but I kept calm in front of my parents. They said their goodbyes and left, because they have long road ahead of them.

As soon as they left the parking lot I turned to Noah and attacked him with hugs and kisses.

“Slow down baby, let me congratulate you and give you this beautiful flower.” It really was beautiful bouquet. Noah always got me beautiful flowers.

“How was it? Did you like it?” I was interested in Noah’s opinion, because it was his first ballet play he saw.

“It was beautiful! You were amazing! I know you can stretch your legs right, but I didn’t know you can stretch them like this.” I didn’t know if I should slap his arm for his stupid comment or laugh at him as he was trying to show me what he meant and trying to do the pose he was referring to.

“Okay ballerina I get it!” I laugh and stopped him from what he was doing before he got himself injured.

“Do you want to go out for dinner and drinks? Or go home and order something? You must be hungry.” We intertwined our hands and Noah led me to his car. He was right, I didn’t eat much today, because of the nerves.

“I think I want to go home, order something to eat, have a glass of wine, have hot bubble bath and then my back could use a massage…”

“I will give you massage only if you let me join you in the bath.” Of course he wouldn’t miss that chance.

“Deal. Let’s get home.” Noah started his car and took my hand in his.

“I love you and I’m so proud of you. I’m getting tickets to every show and I’m making the guys come with me.”

“Okay.” I laughed, but I knew he was serious. I’m sure that at the next show I’m going to see the core of BO crew in the front row.

“But I’m serious, I love you.”

“I love you too Noah, thank you for being by my side for all of this.”

“Always.”

[sherifftillman]

Happy to Help

Pairing: Keys x f!Reader Genre: smut (18+, minors DNI) Word count: 3.7k Summary: Forgetting you'd spoken to customer support from your favourite game leads to something getting sent to the wrong person. A/N: Listen, I know there's a set-up for potentially more. I would like to write potentially more. But nothing puts a writer off more than demands for a part 2, okay? For now, enjoy my first ever Keys fic. :)

Welcome to Free City Customer Support. We appreciate your patience. Connecting you to a member of our team…

Keys: Hi there! What seems to be the problem today?

You: hi, my screen is like. frozen dead. can't do anything, can't click anything. can't alt-tab out, can't ctrl-alt-delete. but i made a lot of progress between save points and idk if it can still be salvaged

Keys: Oof, yeah, that's the worst. Hopefully we can get you back up and running. Real quick, are you sure it's not your internet? I mean, you seem like you know your way around a computer, just worth double-checking, if it's your network then there's not a lot I can do.

You: yeah, sorry, should have added that. everything else that connects to my internet is working. i have an error message if that helps?

Keys: Yes! That's amazing! Can you send me it, please?

You: it says "error 72816: attempting patch repair"

You: there was a spinning buffering wheel in the corner but it gave up the ghost about twenty minutes ago.

Keys: Interesting. I don't remember making that error message, let alone what would trigger it. Are you sure that's what it says? No typos?

You: you wound me.

You: jk jk sorry this is a Very Professional Customer Support Exchange. no, definitely no typos.

Keys: Hahaha, don't worry, I've read far worse messages from people today, that made me laugh!

Keys: This is a little unorthodox but I'm wracking my brain here and I can't think of another solution. If I give you my work phone number, would you text me a photo of your screen?

Keys: Usually, I'd ask for an email of a screenshot, but, well…

You: yeah sure, whatever gets me out of this purgatory.

Keys: Super appreciate your patience here. My number is: 

Keys: [redacted]

Keys: Okay, got it, deleted the message with my number so it won't show up in chat history, in case you're wondering. Data protection and all.

You: the professional techie guy with the techie-ass nickname being cautious about cyber security? groundbreaking.

Keys: Haha! You got me there!

Keys: Oh! Wait! Are you registered as a beta tester?

You: no?? i didn't know that was a thing??

Keys: Yeah, all ours are internal and I don't recognise your username in our database, now that I've pulled it up. I think you must have just slipped through the cracks, let me look into the code of our new test area and see if I can boot you back out.

You: ooh, are you gonna come bursting in through my door with a swat team to erase my memory, too?

Keys: I'm just a "professional techie guy" here, not a Man In Black, haha. 

Keys: Hey, I see you!

Keys: In this code, I mean.

Keys: It's showing up that there's an unauthorized player.

Keys: That's what I meant.

You: well yeah, didn't think you were in my walls or anything

Keys: Just making sure! Didn't want you really thinking I was stalking you or anything.

Keys: Still don't remember making that error message, but that's another mystery, I guess.

You: ooh, maybe the game's becoming sentient and it's outgrowing us all!

Keys: There's that imagination again!

Keys: I'm gonna reset your position to your safehouse, hopefully also keeping your progress intact? If this doesn't work then a hard reboot is unfortunately the only other way.

You: you're a doll.

You: AHHHH IT WORKED I'M BACK AND I STILL GOT A SICK ASS BIKE WAITING FOR ME IN MY GARAGE

You: THANK YOU SO MUCH AHHHHHH

Keys: Pleasure's all mine, glad I could help. Please reach out if it happens again! Or if you have any other issues!

You: will do. so long, techie guy. thanks for everything!

Keys: Happy playing!

— — — —

It's been a relatively quiet Friday evening for you. Nobody's made any plans to go out, and you're unsure yourself whether you have the energy to. You've pretty much spent your whole day gaming, so you should probably fill your social battery a little, but do you really want to go to a bar by yourself?

You glance over at your phone and smirk at it. There is that guy you've been talking to… Maybe you'll send him something to spice the night up.

Once you've done your hair and make-up to add to the whole look, you find your cutest set of underwear, put it on and take a couple of selfies until there's one you're especially pleased with. Your muscle memory has you tapping three message contacts down, where he always is since you've been texting friends all day, and sending the photo on autopilot with the message: Hey, you.

You giggle with delight when your phone chimes almost immediately after - you've really got this guy whipped, huh - but are surprised to see you've apparently forgotten who else you texted today.

[8:23pm] Keys: OH

[8:23pm] Keys: OH NO

[8:23pm] Keys: I think

[8:23pm] Keys: You've sent this

[8:24pm] Keys: To the wrong person

[8:24pm] Keys: I'm so sorry I saw that!

[8:25pm] You: that's okay, i don't mind that you saw it. :)

[8:25pm] You: besides, burning the midnight oil, still being at your work phone?! don't they have out of hours customer service?

[8:29pm] Keys: I… Might have lied about this being my work phone. I normally have one, but it's getting fixed so I thought I would get away with saying it was a work line to help you out.

[8:30pm] You: and then i went and accidentally sent you an unsolicited lewd. sorry.

[8:36pm] Keys: It was just a shock, is all!

[8:38pm] You: well, since we're both here, and since you haven't deleted the photo yet despite how quickly you deleted your number from the chat log earlier, *and* how long it's taking you to reply, what do you think?

[8:40pm] Keys: Oh god, you're so right, I'm so sorry, I'll delete it now.

[8:40pm] You: don't!

[8:40pm] You: like i said, i want your feedback on it now.

[8:41pm] Keys: Oh! Well, it's very nice.

[8:41pm] You: nice?! ouuuuch.

[8:42pm] Keys: What do you mean? Nice is a compliment!

[8:43pm] You: yeah, from your grandma when you've given her a birthday card. c'mon, i can take it. tell me what you REALLY think. :)

[8:50pm] Keys: I… I think you're very attractive.

[8:51pm] You: there you go! it's super adorable that you're stammering over text, btw.

[9:01pm] Keys: [image attached]

[9:01pm] Keys: It felt weirdly unbalanced that you at least didn't know what I looked like, too.

[9:02pm] You: well damn, no wonder they call you keys, because you are just my *type!*

[9:02pm] You: get it?

[9:03pm] Keys: …That was cheesy as hell.

[9:03pm] Keys: But I like cheese :]

[9:03pm] You: oh yeah? give me your cheesiest pick-up line 

[9:13pm] Keys: Are you made of copper and tellurium? Because you're CuTe!

[9:13pm] You: i award that 🧀🧀🧀/5. you could be cheesier.

[9:19pm] Keys: Okay, fine.

[9:20pm] Keys: Are you Google? Because you have everything I'm searching for.

[9:22pm] You: 🧀🧀🧀🧀. are YOU google because i'm feeling lucky. ultimate cheese has no comeback. c'mon, you're so close.

[9:26pm] Keys: Oof, okay, give me a sec.

[9:28pm] Keys: Although really you should never use Google if you can help it, they already datamine so much information out of you that the less you use any Google product, the safer you are. I use DuckDuckGo myself, but you should really do your own research when it comes to cybersecurity rather than just blindly trust someone, even if they are a professional.

[9:28pm] You: keys.

[9:29pm] Keys: Right. Sorry.

[9:38pm] Keys: If you were a grade, you'd be A+, because I want to take you home and show you to my parents.

[9:39pm] You: okay, that wins. maximum cheese for keys 🧀🧀🧀🧀🧀

[9:39pm] You: next ranking category: 🌶️ 

[9:39pm] You: let's see what you got, hot stuff

[9:45pm] Keys: What?! I can't just send you stuff like that! That's so forward!

[9:46pm] You: keys you've seen my tits

[9:46pm] You: i think we're past that

[9:55pm] Keys: Accidentally!

[9:55pm] You: and all the time you spend scrolling back up to it is "accidental", too?

[9:56pm] Keys: …How could you tell?

[9:57pm] You: every now and then you take a little bit longer between messages. just assuming you're scrolling up lol

[9:56pm] You: like i keep saying. i don't mind at all. you don't have to be shy around me

[9:58pm] Keys: Well, since all my cards are apparently on the table so obviously…

[9:58pm] Keys: Do you work at Subway? Because you just gave me a foot-long.

[9:59pm] You: ????? talk about 0-60! also i think that deserves negative 🌶️ for the psychic damage it caused me to read

[10:00pm] Keys: You just turned my software into hardware.

[10:00pm] You: what happened to "that's so forward", eh?

[10:01pm] You: but, credit where it's due, 🌶️🌶️. normally a 🌶️ but from you it's like a 2.5/5

[10:01pm] Keys: Your outfit would look great on my bedroom floor.

[10:01pm] You: oh

[10:02pm] You: oh my god

[10:02pm] You: oh you sweet boy, you're googling them, aren't you

[10:02pm] You: or whatever you use instead

[10:04pm] Keys: Some of us need the extra help! We're not all as smooth as you.

[10:04pm] You: sure you are, baby, you just need to get comfortable

[10:05pm] Keys: But I'm already on my bed!

[10:05pm] You: not just in that way! try taking something off

[10:06pm] You: and then send me proof 😇

[10:11pm] Keys: [image attached]

[10:11pm] Keys: ;]

[10:12pm] You: taking off your glasses doesn't count, dork!

[10:12pm] Keys: [image attached]

[10:12pm] Keys: like this?

[10:13pm] You: holy fuck

[10:13pm] You: hi you're hot

[10:14pm] Keys: Hahaha, thank you? I still don't feel any more charismatic, though!

[10:15pm] You: well, going back to your line about being like a good grade you wanna take home… does that maybe mean you also want to pin me up on the fridge?

[10:18pm] Keys: Well, the fridge isn't very sturdy. I think I'd rather do that against the wall.

[10:18pm] You: okay now *that’s* hot

[10:18pm] You: and what would you do with me once you'd pinned me to the wall? 

[10:24pm] Keys: I'm not very good at all of the imaginative talk stuff that sounds sexy. Even using the word seems like the total opposite of what I'm trying to do.

[10:25pm] You: not at all, sometimes bluntness is the sexiest thing of all.

[10:29pm] Keys: Well, I'd really like to kiss you. All over, actually. 

[10:29pm] You: *all* over?

[10:31pm] Keys: Yeah. The way you were posing made your neck look amazing.

[10:32pm] Keys: Oh god, now I sound like a vampire

[10:34pm] You: i promise you don't, that was my intention when i took it lol. besides, vampires are sexy as hell. i'd love it if you kissed my neck

[10:34pm] You: would you touch me?

[10:35pm] Keys: Wouldn't I be holding you against the wall?

[10:36pm] You: true, but there's other ways. like, you could put your leg between mine to keep me in place

[10:37pm] You: mmm, and then i could grind against your thigh while you keep this little promise of kissing and touching me *all over*

[10:37pm] You: does that sound good?

[10:41pm] Keys: Oh god yes

[10:43pm] You: and then that leaves my hands free to touch you, too. i wanna play connect the dots with those cute little moles of yours

[10:47pm] Keys: Oh my god

[10:48pm] Keys: that made me want to trace them myself for some reason and that felt so good

[10:49pm] You: you're touching yourself AND not paying attention to grammar anymore? for lil ol' me?

[10:49pm] You: that deserves a reward, i think 

[10:51pm] You: [image attached]

[10:51pm] You: i seem to have lost my bra, come over and help me find it?

[10:58pm] Keys: holy shit 

[10:58pm] Keys: can i just say what i'm thinking and then you can tell me if i'm going to far 

[10:59pm] You: i think you mean *too, nerd boy, but yes, i'd love that

[11:06pm] Keys: sorry typing is getting difficult at the moment

[11:11pm] Keys: i want to hold them so bad. they look amazing, especially with your nipples so hard

[11:11pm] You: when you say typing is difficult, are you touching yourself right now?

[11:12pm] You: because now i'm playing with my nipples and wishing it was you

[11:13pm] You: tell me, baby. you want me to rub them? squeeze them? you wanna come over and suck on them?

[11:17pm] Keys: i want to feel them get hard. want to touch them while i kiss you

[11:17pm] You: attaboy! i knew you had it in you

[11:19pm] You: they're so sensitive now. and humping my pillow as if it’s your leg isn't enough, can i touch myself for you, please?

[11:23pm] Keys: oh god yes please do

[11:23pm] You: are you okay to call? i have a feeling both of us are getting preoccupied now

Your phone lights up with the name "Keys Freecity" and you immediately put it on speaker, letting the phone rest on your pillow next to you. "Well, hey there."

"Uh, hi." His voice is shaking and his breath is hitching.

"You know, you never told me if you were touching yourself or not," you point out.

"I - I am," he stammers out, and you purr back.

"God, I wish I was there to do that for you. Or at least to watch. I bet you look so fucking good right now. What are you thinking about, then, huh?"

"I was, uh… Thinking, about… The way you look up in those photos… And…" He falters out, but you hear the faintest groan, still.

"Aw, you want me to suck you off, baby?" You tease. "Thinking about me looking up at you? My lips wrapped around your cock? Mmm, I bet it's so big I can barely fit, huh?"

"I… I mean, it's not the sandwich I promised earlier, but… It's definitely bigger than… Average," Keys explains, and you don't hold back on the moan that hearing that news elicits from you.

You still laugh softly at his joke. "Yeah, I could tell, baby. Fuck, when are you coming over and splitting me in half already?"

"God, I wish I could," he replies in a strained voice. “Also, it’s really - hot when y- you call me that.”

"Yeah? And how do you like it, baby? You wanna fuck me on my back, so you can keep watching me as you play with me? Or you wanna be the one to lay there and take it while I bounce on your dick? Or d- do you wanna just - bend me over and - fuck me senseless, huh?" As you finally give into temptation, sliding your hand beneath your panties and finally giving your clit the attention it's been craving for far too long, your breath hitches and your voice gets weaker.

“Oh, god, I… All of it, god, please, I don’t care, just want you,” he groans through the phone.

“I want you too, baby, you sound so good,” you croon sultrily, rubbing yourself in faster, tighter circles. “Are you close, hm? Gonna cum for me? I wanna hear you get off so bad.”

“Wanna - wanna get off for yo- with you, want you, please,” he whines.

“Mmm, tell me one more time, baby. What are you thinking of now?” You ask as you sink a finger inside of you. “Thinking of fucking me, yet?”

“Mm - mm-hm,” Keys whimpers. “You - You on top of me, talking like that and - and riding me, treating my cock so good.”

“I’d treat you so good, baby," you groan, adding another finger. "And you'd fill me up, wouldn't you? Fuck me - oh, right there," you whine as you curl your fingers to hit just the right spot. "Oh god, Keys, need you inside me."

Something about you saying his name short-circuits his brain. You just about hear his strained string of moans and profanities through the phone, picturing in your head how that sweet face of his must look - eyes glassing over, lips slightly parted, chest heaving. Maybe you’d fuck him with his glasses on. Maybe they’d be clouded over, knocked askew on his face as you bounced up and down on his dick. “Did you just come for me, baby?” you coo, your shoulders tensing and toes curling as you feel your own release building.

"Mm-hm, yeah, made - made a real mess of myself, shit," he half-laughs with exhaustion.

“That’s my good boy,” you smile dazedly, your core convulsing around your fingers. "Want me to cum for you, too?"

"Oh, shit, you haven- where are my - God, fuck, yes, let me hear you s… Say my name," his voice shakes with the effort he's trying to exude confidence into his tone, betrayed by the immediate, "please," that rolls off his tongue.

Closing your eyes, imagining that look on his face again, pressing your phone flush against your ear as if it pulls him closer to you, you finally leg out an, "Oh, god, Keys!" before finally feeling yourself gush down your fingers, past your hand, even. Breathing heavily, you pant, "Shit, baby, I think you made me squirt."

"Is that a good thing?" he asks meekly.

"Very. You doing good, now?"

"Very!" He repeats back to you, breathlessly, making you laugh. "Sorry I was so… Pathetic, I guess. God," his voice muffles as though he's rubbing his face while he talks. "But it did sound like you were into it a little," he points out with a lilt in his voice.

You grin, "I sure did, but if you wanted to do it again, but more… Confidently, I'd be more than happy to do that again. If you wanted."

"I've never really done… Any of that before, like, at all," he starts, and you interrupt him with a laugh.

"Yeah, no shit, Mr Subway!"

"Ah, like I said, that's not entirely untrue," he laughs awkwardly. "But I've especially never done anything with a total stranger, much less someone I helped through work, um, they can't - you wo- please, don't -"

"You mean this isn't standard practice for Free City customer support?" You tease sarcastically, before adding in a serious tone, "I won't tell a soul. Besides, I like having you as my dirty little secret."

He chuckles, "Oh, yeah?"

"Yeah. Maybe the next time you're feeling up to it, we can video call."

"N-Next time?!"

You hurriedly add, "If you wanted, you sounded like you did, if this is the first and last, that's totally -"

"No! I mean, yeah! I mean… If that's… Cool," he stammers.

You smile, "It's very cool. Just gotta be a little more confident. Isn't there something you do when you need that extra boost? Like, surely in the game you gotta be a little more self-assured around trolls and hackers and shit, right?"

He groans, "I was hoping you wouldn't ask about that."

Grinning wickedly, you poke further. "Well, now I have to know. Who are you in the game? Have I ever seen you?"

"I… I play a cop," he admits, sounding as though he'd rather the ground swallowed him whole. "It's usually me and my buddy, and he's - he's a rabbit."

You light up. "Shut the fuck up, you're Dirty Stripper Cop?!"

"Oh god, the players call me that, too?! It's bad enough that Mouser does," he groans in despair.

"No, this is perfect. You just let me know when you’re ready to bring… Dirty Stripper Cop to our little talks, and I’ll be waiting,” you bite back a laugh as you repeat his character’s nickname in the hopes that he’ll still take your offer seriously.

A moment of silence exists between the two of you before he pipes up, “...And what if I still want to talk to you, without… All of this? I mean, if that’s all you want, then I guess, but… I dunno, you still seem really cool, and you made me laugh today, even at work when it felt weird in my cheeks to start smiling. But if this is all you want with -”

The rest of his words get drowned out as you move your phone away from its position to look at your dating app notifications. Keys has apparently not been your only option tonight. And you’ve never been one to commit. But something tells you that this was the best offer you’re getting. And the next one will be. As will the one after that, and that’s not even set in stone, yet. But you’re hoping to guarantee it.

As you return your headset to your ear, he’s still rambling. You cut him off with a simple, “Keys.” He shuts up quickly, and you continue, “I - I meant it. I wanna talk to you again. Maybe more than just this, I dunno, I’m bad at this sorta stuff. But… You’re cute. In more ways than one. And if you wanna keep talking, I’ll try. But that’s all I can promise.”

“That’s enough for me! I’ll, um, I’ll text you in the morning, then? Or is that too soon?”

“I honestly wish I could tell you,” you admit sadly. You hope it gets through to him that your reservations aren’t on his part.

Thankfully for you, he doesn’t seem so keen to give up. “Alright! Well, I suppose I got some cleaning up to do before I get some shut-eye. Um, so I’ll talk to you, tomorrow… At some point. Um, goodnight!”

“Goodnight, baby.”

[fanderstuckin2018]

Another one!!

A PsychoAnalysis of Virgil Sanders’ Playlist

There is an EXTREME theme in most of Virgil's songs of growing apart from someone. Like I'm talking heavy themes of a messy falling out, and I think we all know what its referencing. But I'll save that to the end. Here's the songs analysis!

Theres a lot of emotions connected with the collapse of a relationship, and its demonstrated so in SO MANY of his songs, so I'll color-code it to make sense. Blue is sadness and regret, red is anger and frustration, yellow is relief. Keep in mind that these arent all the songs, just the ones that most support my theory/analysis.

Sally's Song: talks about being unable to be with someone romantically because of the lack of acknowledgement towards the singer. "What will become of my dear friend? Where will his actions lead us then?" It's mournful of the loss of connection that the singer once had with the subject of the song, like they're longing for it back. Yes ik this song was maybe just added because he likes Nightmare Before Christmas, but it fits into this theme quite well...

It Ends Tonight: Talking about ending a relationship, cutting someone off very messily. "Maybe it's best you leave me alone", "Now I'm on my own side/It's better than being on your side". Despite being more heated, I'd say this can also be a song of relief due to the lyric "a weight is lifted from my chest". ALSO the "darkness turns to light" lyric can directly reference Virgil, and how he essentially "transformed" from being a Dark Side to a Light Side over the course of his character arc.

I'd Hate to Be You When People Find Out What This Song is About: bro this one is RIPE with themes of fall out, as well as regret. The singer seems to have had a hand in this messy breakup or fall out with the subject of the song, and seems resentful of themself for it. "When I asked you/Believe me/You never let go/But I let go". They are conscious of their role in ruining this relationship, and seem to place most of the blame on themselves for it. "And now you're trying desperately/But I'm tongue tied and terrified of what I'll say" implies that they seem to want to get back with whoever they pushed away, but are too afraid of repeating the past to actually reconcile.

A Decade Under the Influence: this song seems to be about friend group issues. There's hints of good memories "You kept still until the long drive home/You slept safe and close to the window", and yet theres the underlying anxiety of "I got a bad feeling about this". Then there's the whole "To hell with you and all your friends" that repeats consistently throughout the song, as well as the lyric "I thought it through and my worst brings out the best in you" making me believe that the singer was probably the butt of the jokes or the most "replaceable" one within the friend group. I hesitate to categorize this song as "angry or frustrated" because it sounds more anxious and paranoid, but can also fall under relief with the context we have of Virgil's story; relief that he doesn't feel that way anymore.

I'm Not Okay: okay I get it this song was put on his playlist cause "haha Virgil emo" but I'm serious it also falls under this theme quite directly. And yes, its regret out of everything. "I never want to let you down/Or have you go, it's better off this way"; despite the singer not wanting their subject to be cut out of their life, its obvious they know its beneficial for both parties. There's a bit of relief as well as regret. I think this can also go along with Influence's themes of being the scapegoat of a friend group, because of the lyrics "forget about the dirty looks" and "You sing the words but don't know what it means/To be a joke".

Thnks Fr th Mmrs: Okay this one is my personal fav, I think Fallout Boy slaps. Anywasy, this song can be both heatedly passionate and relief, but I believe it better fits under relief. It seems like this event that happened is far enough in the past that the singer has come to terms with it. Specifically with the line "One night and one more time/Thanks for the memories/Even though they weren't so great". This can also be taken as sarcastically rather than genuine, and I think both fit Virgil's character well. The singer understands that what has happened has happened, and there's no way to change the past "I'm looking forward to the future." However, they still feel weighed down because of it "And this crystal ball/It's always cloudy except for/When you look into the past."

Ignorance: AAHHH THIS ONE IS MY ALL TIME FAV THANK YOU VIRGIL FOR INTRODUCING ME TO PARAMORE. Ahem. Okay. So I referenced this song in like my first post to this blog, but I think it's VERY obvious what Side this song refers to. I mean, take a guess: "Where's your gavel? Your jury?/What's my offense this time?", "The same tricks that, that once fooled me/They won't get you anywhere/I'm not the same kid from your memory", "Ignorance is your new best friend". Yeah this song is aimed towards Deceit/Janus 100%. This is a very anger-powered song and its clear that the singer holds immense hatred towards the subject. Deceit I believe is the best contender for this because of the entirety of SvS ("Where's your gavel? Your jury?"), and also because "ignorance" is something very intertwined to Deceit's character and his motivations. When we first meet him, one ofthe first things he says as himself is "what you don't know can't hurt you," which is a different way of saying "ignorance is bliss." Thus, "ignorance is your best friend". There's also references to the singer's past relationship with the subject, and it can be inferred that it was positive in some aspects, but ended up being toxic and repressing to them, thus why they left; "Yeah, we used to stick together/We wrote our names in blood/But I guess you can't accept that the change is good." I could go on and on about this song, but I think I've made my point.

The Ice is Getting Thinner: hooh boy. This one makes me sad. This song is about a relationship slowly dying, but both parties holding on to the relationship without really trying to salvage it. It seems that "change" was once again the reason for this drifting apart ("We're not the same, dear, as we used to be/The seasons have changed and so have we".) It's longing, just like Sally's Song, longing for how things used to be, even if what "used to be" wasn't healthy or beneficial for both parties; "it saddens me to say/But we both know, well, it's true/That the ice was getting thinner/Under me and you." It sounds almost like they are coming to a realization and acceptance of this.

OKAY SONG ANALYSIS DONE, HOW DOES THIS RELATE TO VIRGIL??

Well I think thats obvious. He's being eat up by these swarming emotions that surround his leaving of the Dark Sides. The fact that these make up 8 out of the 20 songs (and many more can be connected back to this theme of relationship fallout!) shows that it's been on his mind for a long time. If we go off of the implications of these songs, it seems that Virgil himself realizes that his leaving the Dark Sides was seen as some sort of betrayal, no matter the circumstances. He blames himself, he blames Janus, he's angry about their fall out but he also is relieved by it. No matter what happened, I believe that these feelings are going to come to a head one way or another. He needs to confront his past, and it seems that he wants to, but is also held back by his own anxiety over the situation (and his anxiety in general.) There's so much tension between him and Deceit/Janus specifically that is just bubbling beneath the surface that probably is going to erupt some time in the future and will drive a rift even further between the Light and Dark sides. In what way? I don't know....

~

hope you enjoyed :) virgil's playlist is my favorite out of all of the sides' and thats partially because I was an emo when it released HAHAH. I'm thinking of doing deceit's next, cause hes my fav character, and i just think its fitting lol. i also might redo roman's psychoanalysis bc i literally did that last night at midnight and I wanna add more evidence and direct quotes. im a nerd...i like writing essays XD

@thatsthat24 what do u think man did i do a good job 👀

[elvenbeard]

During his time working at Arasaka, Vince lives in a company-issued apartment, obviously, and so far, for VP purposes and such, I've always gone to the Corpo-Plaza apartment for that. I thought, maybe it is a little too fancy, but then again, the view isn't all that great, it's not that high up, and it doesn't even have a bathtub, so, it works xD

I feel like it would kinda fit that Arasaka has their employees close by (iirc, the Counterintel agents gotta be "on call" basically 24/7 in case of an emergency, so even Charter Hill would be pretty far away, Wellsprings might work still, but yes). Also, you have Arasaka Tower right in front of your window and only very flimsy shutters, so you can always be reminded of your work duties and loyalties basically from the comfort of your living room XD

Anyway though, I wondered, how would Vince get to work every day? I don't see him having a car at the time, cause I imagine parking in City Center to be hellish and/or expensive af. Delamain would work, but when Vince still lived in Charter Hill, he and his friends used the metro to get around most times, so I think he might go back to that. So I tried it out, since there's a station nearby, and the closest stop to Arasaka Tower is Memorial Park. The walking to and from the stations also takes up some time though, and so the fastest and most direct way is actually just walking directly xD

So I walked his way to work, and *the shortest* most direct way on foot between Corpo-Plaza apartment and entrance of Arasaka Tower is through the 2023 memorial site. And idk. I love that on multiple levels.

Obviously, it's not gonna be the shortest way for everyone, but imagining that visitors and others who are able to walk to work have to go through the memorial to get in sends a super strong message imo (one of shifting the blame away from themselves completely, as you do as a big evil corporation). Level-design-wise it's *chef's kiss*, too. And storytelling-wise that gives me a whole bunch of new ideas for Vince's and Johnny's already-strained relationship as well xD Like, for a couple of years, twice a day often, Vince has listened to how these vile terrosists killed millions of innocents with their actions, and how Arasaka will never forget about that, etc etc. And then, of all possible people it's *the* terrorist that gets stuck in his head because Arasaka took the "never forgetting" a little too far on too many unethical levels.

With that in mind I feel like all the interactions with Vince and Johnny that revolve around the "terrorist" thing in the beginning have a much stronger impact. If Vince hadn't had that daily walk to work (or if he had had a different background altogether), there really would only be the information Viktor gives on Johnny post-Konpeki-heist. While that works, too, it's not a super deeply ingrained conviction V has, just something their trusted Ripper told them and they just accept as truth (not that Vik would lie, but you get my meaning).

But with Vince, Johnny would actually have to claw his way through years of subtle brainwashing to have Vince stop calling him a terrorist without a purpose deeper than causing death and destruction. And idk... I sometimes just love how little headcanons that start out with no big thoughts behind them ("Where would he live? well, Corpo Plaza apartment maybe, cause that means I don't have to build my own scene for this lil VP idea") lead to bigger and bigger ideas and work really well with what the game provides already xD

[cardinalone-ao3]

June 20 - discover

@hinnymicrofic

A/N: So uhhh, this was new for me. Another scene I’ve always pictured for them in the summer after the war. I think it would be extremely difficult for both Harry and Ginny to actually talk for a while, which would lead to other issues. I think the vision of Harry dead, on top of everything else, would haunt her quite a bit. She was mentally prepared for the possibility/likelihood of it happening following their DH kiss, but facing the reality (and then him coming back) would make it hard for her to reconcile him being alive.

Content warnings: mature/nsfw themes; referencing (consensual) sexual activity; underage

Under the cut because of the tags:

_____________________________________________

He slept in the Burrow’s attic a lot that first summer after the war, usually when staying at Hogwarts was too much for him. Plus, Ron insisted they be together as much as possible - he supposed months on the run together and everything that happened during the Battle made him want to keep an eye on everyone. He didn’t blame him.

He found out rather quickly that “together” certainly had its limits. For example, he definitely didn’t want to stay together in Ron’s room, what with the sound of Ron and Hermione doing that. No amount of privacy charms could make him forget those noises.

So, the thankfully now ghoul-free attic it was. Which was how he found himself one early July evening, staring out the small half-moon window watching the thunderstorm. The loud bangs of thunder and lightning were less scary than what awaited him once he closed his eyes.

A small noise alerted him and Ginny poked her head inside the room, then upon seeing him, she entered and closed the door softly behind her. They hadn’t talked much, not really. Not about the important stuff he said he would, like horcruxes and pensieve memories. It was still too hard, too guilt-ridden.

She was wearing a soft, oversized Harpies shirt and short cotton shorts, her hair tied up in some loose bun. In a word: beautiful. Captivating would have also been appropriate.

Her face was set, determined, eyes blazing. Whatever she intended, he knew he didn’t stand a chance. She slowly walked over and sat on the bed.

Vaguely realizing he hadn’t said anything yet, he attempted to say something, but she quickly shushed him with a finger to his lips. His skin tingled underneath.

Another flash of lightning lit up her face and he caught the hint of fear and grief behind her eyes. It hurt every time he saw the grief there, knowing his part in it. He reached a hand to hers and she caught it and clung onto it.

“You’re alive,” she breathed softly. A fresh wave of guilt for the things he’d done and still couldn’t talk about washed over him. He rubbed a small circle across her hand with his thumb and nodded.

She gave a brief jerk of her head more in affirmation to herself, and he wasn’t sure she believed him. Her face set again and the determined look was back. “I need you to show me.”

“What?” He asked, utterly confused for a moment. He studied her face, the flicker of nervous uncertainty masked by resolve and a flash of something that looked like desire made her meaning clear. His stomach dropped. What she was suggesting was preposterous, potentially disastrous.

“Show me,” she insisted, bringing his hand to her chest, settling it over her heart. He could feel the beating of it and his stomach calmed, then he felt the swell of her breasts and his mind short-circuited. Her eyes were almost pleading, and he knew there was no miscommunication about what she was implying.

She didn’t wait for him to respond as she snaked her hand around the back of his head and pulled him to her, their lips crashing together. It was the tonic he somehow forgot he lived on.

He’d never quite appreciated just how soft her lips were before, and how wonderful it felt to kiss her. His other hand snaked up to her hair and it took everything he had to not succumb willingly and completely to her.

He begrudgingly broke off to make sure, but her look silenced him.

“Every…,” she sniffed and took a deep breath to try and compose herself, “every time I close my eyes you’re dead. And I…I need to know that this you …the one I can touch…isn’t. I need you to show me, Harry.”

He looked in her eyes, studying the golden flecks in her chocolate brown for any sign of doubt, but found none. He understood it deeply, the need to discern nightmares from reality.

“I’m not…I haven’t,” he took a deep breath, steadying himself. “I’ve never done this before…”

She gave a small smile. “Me either.” She then rested her forehead against his, like she always used to do after a particularly enjoyable snog, and he surrendered.

Their lips were on each other again quickly. Strikes of lightning and thunder continued, masking their first time together. Time full of reverence and proof. Time spent together wholly - to drive away ghosts, to discover who they were now and who they could possibly be again.

[jetiisyandereclones]

Hey! First of all, absolutely love your writing and art, it never fails to make me smile when you post.

I don’t know how to type this without sounding awkward, but I had a random platonic yandere/reader idea inspired by your yandere clone family au that I just wanted to get out of my system and figured you might enjoy.

I started thinking about Arla Fett (Jango’s older sister) in this universe. 

In case you aren’t familiar with her character here’s a quick summary: After the murder of her’s and Jango’s parents she was enslaved by the Death Watch and eventually developed an extremely damaging case Stockholm syndrome. She would act as an assassin for the death watch before being arrested. Later on a Jedi general-turned mandolorian by the name of Bardin Jussik would try to help Arla heal from her trauma but after she begged him to help her forget about it entirely, Bardin simply wiped her memory using the force. The two then fell in love and would have settled down (had order 66 not occurred).

So, then I got to thinking: what if these events happened a few years sooner so that Arla and Bardin were already settled down during the war. And how would the yandere clones react to not only having a blood related sister, but a Jedi brother-in-law, and their likely force sensitive teenager aka reader.

Let’s say the war ends and the various clone battalions are rounding up their respective Jedi but the group formerly run by Bardin Jussik wind up having trouble tracking down their long lost general who left abruptly during the war due to his issues with the Jedi council’s leadership and the republic’s approach to the war. 

They get to the point that TBB get called in to help find him.

Even after some time passes, Jussik doesn’t seem to be anywhere and most assume he’s dead as there is literally no trace of him anywhere. TBB eventually refocus their efforts on to other troublesome Jedi (Such as Kanan, Ezra, Vera Sai, and Nazra) who have at least been seen alive and well in the past decade.

Their efforts to track down the Ghost crew lead them back to Lothal since it’s a planet the Ghost returns to regularly. 

The rest of the batch spreads out to search for clues while Hunter brings the Marauder to a refuel station bc the busy marketplace gives him a headache and he just needs a little rest from constantly tracking. 

He gets there and he’s met with reader working the station who’s about three or four years older than Omega. As Hunter asks them to just refuel the ship he can’t help but notice the teen is sort of staring him down.

Expecting some kind of anti-clone sentiment or getting called sub-human he simply asks

“What never seen a clone before?”

Reader looks at him confused and Hunter suddenly remembers that Lothal never had any part in the war and most people on the planet couldn’t care less who he or his brothers were, especially now that the war was over.

Suddenly, almost like they can read his thoughts, reader starts looking embarrassed and apologetic.

“I’m not sure what that’s supposed to mean but…yeah I guess I have been pretty rude just staring huh?” Reader holds up a hand in front of Hunter’s face and closes one of their eyes so that they can only see the non-tattooed side of his face. “It’s just- my buir used to show me holos of my ba’vodu and I swear you look just like him. I’m probably just imagining it.”

Hunter is taken aback by the comment and is suddenly very interested in learning more about this barely paid refueling station attendant’s family. He figures the kid’s dad and uncle are deserters like Cut Laquane. Reader’s additions of some mando’a into their sentences only seems to cement his theory.

The two have a friendly conversation and Hunter finds himself amused by reader’s wide-eyed curiosity about the world outside of Lothal as it’s very reminiscent of when he first met Omega. 

Meanwhile reader is just thrilled that this starship captain is willing to answer all of their questions about his adventures across the galaxy ( Hunter leaves out the whole capturing and lovingly imprisoning all of the Jedi of course). 

Reader grew up on a farm with barely any contact with anybody aside from their parents (the other kids on Lothal find reader creepy for some reason) so speaking with Hunter is a breath of fresh air.

Reader rambles on about how boring life on the farm is and how they were lucky their parents even let them get a job in town since they’re so overprotective.

Reader winds up feeling guilty for making Hunter uncomfortable at first due to them staring at him and then info dumping on him. Eventually reader offers to pay for the Marauder’s fuel as an apology for wasting the man’s time.  

Hunter and reader wind up talking for so long that the rest of the batch come looking for their leader, only to find him lightly bickering with a kid about how it’s not necessary for them to pay for his fuel for simply looking at him a little too long.

Hunter suddenly remembers he has a duty and mission to complete and goes into leader mode, discussing with the others on where they should land the ship for the night so they have a place to stay.

Reader casually offers the empty field on their family’s farm since they wouldn’t have to pay for it like the ship docking spots in town. Reader also mentions harvest season just passed and their father has a tendency to cook an excess of food. 

Wrecker is sold on the idea immediately upon the offer of free food and begs his brothers to take up the offer.

Hunter, Tech, Echo, and Crosshair are made suspicious by the generosity and Crosshair is the one to ask what the catch is.

Reader simply made the offer in hopes of learning more about these strange off-worlders and decides to (naively) strike a deal.

“No catches, no fees. All is ask is each of you give me your best stories from your travels across the galaxy. Deal?”

The batch takes them up on their offer and soon find themselves following the kid home. As they travel, the batch all start noticing things. All of them had been around force sensitive children for some time now and had learned about the small habits that  most force sensitives had. Maybe reader answers any questions they have before the batch can even ask them. Almost like they read the batch’s minds. The batch quickly notice that reader’s reflexes are just a little too fast for a normal person. None of them really need the confirmation but Tech discretely uses a scanner to check reader’s medicloroan count and it’s a higher amount than most.

By the time the Marauder is nearing reader’s farm the entire batch knows they’re taking this kindhearted and naive little force sensitive back with them to Kamino. Now they just need to decide if they need to “take care of” reader’s family before they go.

They land and reader runs up to the house where their very confused mother is waiting in the front yard. Every member of the batch is stunned when they get a good look at reader’s mother. The woman quite literally looks exactly like an adult version of Omega. It’s almost frightening.

Reader’s mother doesn’t entirely know how to feel about the strangers (given she got her memories about the clone war wiped it’s likely she doesn’t realize they’re clones. Let alone clones of her brother)

Reader’s mother introduces herself as Arla Jussik-Fett. At the same time, Bardin steps out of the house and upon seeing the clones, freezes. 

Now, Lothal is an isolated planet, far from the republic. (Exactly the reason he chose to live there)

So Bardin had only heard whispers and warped rumors about what the clones had been doing. As far as he knew, Jedi and force sensitives found by clones were never seen again. Of course Bardin is going to assume they came to kill him and his family.

He never stopped carrying his lightsaber out of cautiousness and already has his hand on it out of instinct.

Reader notices their dad standing close-by and waved him over. 

“Buir! You’ll agree with me! Mom doesn’t agree but don’t you think these guys look like ba’vodu Jango?”  

All hell breaks loose after that.

 Clone force 99 is #shook and Bardin runs to stand between his family and the clones.

“Cyar’ika, ad’ika, go inside and lock the door.” He order, activating his lightsaber. 

Reader is VERY scared by the sudden tenseness that’s taken over. Bardin and Arla share a look and Arla quickly takes reader inside.

Bardin and the Bad Batch take a long few minutes to size one another up. After some time Bardin finally speaks.

“We will give you all one chance to turn around and walk away.”

Crosshair pops a toothpick in his mouth and takes a moment to scan the area.

“We?”

“We.” Bardin nods.

Just then the shot of a sniper rifle rings out. The end of the toothpick in Crosshair’s mouth splinters and is left charred as a blaster bolt just grazes the tip of it. The bolt doesn’t hurt a hair on the clone’s head, but is definitely WAY too close for comfort.

The batch quickly trace the origin of the shot to the front-facing window in the second story of the house where Arla is standing with a rifle pointed down at them.

Arla, despite having lived a fairly quiet and domestic life the past few years, is still a dead on shot. She was a very successful assassin for the Death Watch after all. 

Hitting the toothpick was a warning shot. Crosshair would have dropped had it not been.

“My riduur is right.” Arla shouts down from the open window. “He’s not really the one you need to be worried about.” 

Both Bardin and Arla lived difficult lives and as a result were very particular about security and protecting their home. They wanted to make it so their ad’ika could maintain their innocence. Unfortunately this resulted in reader being extremely sheltered and completely banned from learning how to use their force powers.

After a lot of struggle, Bardin and Arla manage to escape with reader by the skin of their teeth. 

So, TBB return to Kamino to share their strange news. 

They bring the name Arla Fett up to the Alpha clones and they’re vaguely aware of the name as Jango had mentioned her fondly once or twice.

The news quietly spreads around Kamino as a rumor. Some clones are absolutely enthralled by the concept of a new addition to the family. Others are cautious upon finding out Arla was once part of the Death Watch and are against the idea of bringing someone like her near their Jedi.

Some shinnies make the joke that the Fett genetics must give them a type since Arla herself married a Jedi just like so many of her brother’s clones. 

A few of the clones wonder if Arla shares their yandere tendencies. Some clones are already referring to her as Ori’vod Arla and joking about how they wonder if Bardin Jussik is good enough for their big sis. And then some clones just don’t care.

Meanwhile the squad once run by Bardin Jussik is ecstatic to find out their precious general was alive after all. WITH A WIFE NO LESS! Suffice to say they are stoked.

The news about Bardin and Arla’s force sensitive kid is far less widespread or just gets overshadowed.

Since Bardin is off the grid the clones have no idea where he would go. They ask around the Jedi on Kamino but Bardin was never very friendly with any of them. So they instead decide to see what they can find about Arla. Thanks to Emperor Vader the clones are given access to Arla’s arrest records and the subsequent psychiatric treatments she received while in prison. 

When it’s revealed that Arla was essentially enslavement by the Death Watch and used as a soldier it’s like a switch is flipped. Every last clone on Kamino suddenly realizes that the Death Watch did to Arla exactly what the Republic did to them. She really is their sister. A kindred spirit.

Cue the most quietly chaotic custody battle in history with various clone groups and individuals trying to figure out who gets to bring their dear sister and her Jedi husband home to Kamino.

It doesn’t really matter who does it bc the second she’s there she won’t be leaving. With the combined power of the entirety of Kamino it doesn’t take long to find the Jussik-Fett family.

And when they find out about reader? Their ori’vod’s precious ad’ika who’s force sensitive?!

Every single clone is obsessed and wants to be the best uncle.

Every. Single. Clone. 

(I have no idea how that would work out but I feel like the clones would find a way to organize it without completely overwhelming their ori’vod’s dear ad’ika)

Reader’s little family of three suddenly gets much MUCH bigger.

I can see Bardin Jussik being absolutely miserable after being wrangled onto Kamino. (He is absolutely not going without one hell of a fight. He is dragged in kicking and screaming)

The guy left the Jedi order in favor of a mandalorian lifestyle bc he hated the rigidity and hypocrisy of the Jedi. He hated how he couldn’t use his abilities to help more people just because the republic said he wasn’t allowed. Being constantly surrounded by the various Jedi artifacts spread around Kamino would most likely make him feel even more trapped than the bars of the cell that he was kept in before he finally calmed down and stopped biting any clone who would come near.

But he wouldn’t exactly have a chance to escape, especially not with his wife and child! The man would rather die than leave his family alone with the obsessed clones.

I can see him assisting in escapes, but not going with whoever gets loose. He always makes sure he won’t be tied back to the jailbreak so he and his family don’t get in trouble or separated as a punishment. 

(The clones quickly figure out the best way to keep him from trying anything is threatening to take his wife and reader away)

Arla would probably be conflicted about the situation. While she knows being imprisoned on Kamino is supposed to be terrible, she’s happy to be given a second chance at being a sister to Jango. Even if she knows the clones aren’t exactly him (mentally and emotionally that is). She has been in an abusive hostage situation before (Death Watch) but for some reason to her, this time it’s different…? The clones don’t burn a brand into her back like the Death Watch did. They don’t give her scars, don’t chain her up. They never hurt her. They are soft and loving, looking UP to her for guidance and making sure SHE is comfortable being called ori’vod and acting as an older sister to all of them. Many clones go to her for parenting advice and sometimes just to excitedly talk about their day or ask about hers. 

Arla’s mental health has been cracked from a young age. The clones somewhat use this to their advantage. Arla knows that what the clones are doing to the Jedi is wrong, but she also doesn’t entirely see the harm in it?

So many of the families living on Kamino are happy and healthy and everyone cares about one another. And Arla knows that as long as she stays, she’ll be surrounded by family and friends and love. She wouldn’t have to worry about armored soldiers bursting through the door and gunning down her family in front of her. Not again.

She knows Bardin is dissatisfied, and restless and she feels terrible for wanting to stay, but as long as she stays on Kamino, she knows her family is safe.

Reader starts off ecstatic. FINALLY having friends and family who understand them, and mentors willing to help them use the force properly. But before long they start feeling trapped again. Reader realizes they may have traded one prison for another. Lothal for Kamino. They still find themselves wanting to explore the stars. Reader eventually approaches ba’vodu Hunter and asks him if they can come along on the batch’s next expedition.

Hunter flat out says no. The Alphas are strictly against it. Reader asks around and literally every clone on Kamino says no to letting reader come along off world. It’s too dangerous out there for a naive little one like reader! They’re too sweet! Too innocent! (They are also literally getting close to being 18 and very much not a child anymore)

And reader finally realizes the mess they accidentally brought upon themself. 

one day they defeatedly walk up to Hunter, take a seat next to him, tiredly leaning their head on his shoulder.

“Remember that deal we made when we first met? And you promised to give me your best story about one of your adventures? I’m ready to hear it now…”

I’d love to know your thoughts on this! I’d love to know what you think would go differently. This wound up being a lot longer than I thought it would but I figured you might find it interesting! 

Your work is amazing, I think it’s SUPER creative. Please don’t forget to take care of yourself and have an amazing day!

I actually love this.

I dont have a whole lot.more to add except jango fett is still alive in my au. So that would make things extra interesting for aarla.

Also, Bardin and Vera would vibe. She orchestrates a majority of the successful escapes from kamino, and is glad to have his help.

[constantlymisspelled]

Tarre Vizsla - Fan Canon

It’s of no coincidence to me that the Modern Star Wars lore would have us believe that Manda’lor Vizsla’s time occurs 1051 BBY as it simply proves that they haven’t even bothered to open a wiki article on Mandalorians to fact-check themselves.

At the time of 1051 BBY, old Star Wars lore had claimed that as the era of Manda’lor the Uniter, who had saved their home from being completely destroyed by the suspected biological weapon, the water based Blue Shadow Virus. Considering how much of Mandalore was destroyed at that time, and that in the era of Manda’lor the Uniter, the Republic had recovered from the virus and had begun to heal, the fact Mandalore was so targeted creates the notion that the virus was some kind of ill-fated bio weapon. The truth of that is unknown, but what is known is that the time of 1051 BBY was a bad time to be a Mandalorian. Only a tenth of the population survived, and that is the conservative estimate. Even if one removes Manda’lor the Uniter, the existence of the Blue Shadow Virus at this time (which is a canon occurrence in the Clone Wars as well) weakens the idea of Manda’lor Vizsla occurring so late in history, so they must be from an earlier time.

Skip back to the era of the Sacking of the Jedi Temple, and you have a whole new problem. Tarre Vizsla can’t have existed before this time, simply because the wars leading up to the Sacking were between the Republic, and both Mandalore, and the Sith (with Mandalore being the focus of the Republic, and the Sith the focus of the Jedi - roughly speaking, although conflict was had between all factions during this tremulous period) and that creates issues, with Manda’lor Vizsla being both a Mandalorian and a Jedi. Considering that is literally what they are best known for being.

That puts them occurring at a time before 1051 BBY, but after 3760 BBY, and that is a great deal of time to cover.

But why must Tarre Vizsla have existed before 1051, you ask? Well… you see, the Republic and the Jedi committed this terrible war crime called ‘orbitally bombarding a currently peaceful populace that you had a standing truce with out of fear that they might, perhaps, maybe, feel like attacking you first.’ Great job, guys, now the Mandalorians can never forgive, and never forget. If they weren’t going to attack you before, well they sure are now!

Mind you, the Mandalorians of the Crusades and Neo Crusades and perhaps even earlier, had been pretty fucked up, but the point of Manda’lor the Uniter was that they fixed a great deal of that. As should have Tarre Vizsla, if they were born before this event - which, they had to have been, to even exist wearing armour. That means the Republic and the Jedi annihalated a currently unarmed, peaceable culture out of their own fear for actions that the living, at that time (1000 years difference between the events of Knights of the Old Republic games and the destruction of Mandalore - that is a long ass time, even for generational memory) hadn’t even witnessed.

So, between 3000-1000 BBY… that’s well over 2000 years that Tarre Vizsla could have existed in. Hell, there were multiple orders of Mandalorian Jedi in that time, surely they were a part of at least one of them. Additionally, the darksabre was donated, by old Clan Vizsla, to the Temple, after Tarre died.

That means, considering that no other mention of the darksabre in Mandalorian history exists outside of Tarre Vizsla, with the next wielder literally being Tor Vizsla, the creator of modern Death Watch himself, that means that the Jedi Temple was broken into after the Dral Haran (the burning of Mandalore and its once arable worlds) and frankly, as much as I find considering someone leader by right of fancy sword, I can not blame the Vizslas for stealing it back.

Not after such a betrayal. I’m sure Tarre Vizsla is furious that their weapon is now ‘the sign of Kings,’ but I don’t think they mind that it was robbed from the Temple. Nothing justifies the near eradication of a people out of fear. That’s the point. It is even the point of Jaster Mereel’s break from the ideals of the Mandalorians of old. This concept is what the Clan Wars are about - why should a Jedi relic decide the Mandalorian future.

Now, that doesn’t mean that modern Mandalorians aren’t ill-informed - they probably are. Many Mandalorians have probably been grasping at straws to justify their existence and way of life to each other after the Dral Haran. That doesn’t mean we can ignore that it is a lie. The darksabre isn’t the sign of kings, the leadership is.

[any additional thoughts on this topic? Feel free to spam me down below, or link me to someone who has discussed it before. I think it’s a major hole in much of the writing, but that’s just my nerd ass talking.]

[rumblebat]

The poll was fair so here is your precious Kidd x reader! Please read the CW before reading! 💋 word count: 9,455

❗ CW | mention of mental health issues, alcohol abuse, language, s*xual abuse

please do not repost or rewrite my fanfictions, just reblog/request/share them instead! i appreciate your visit!

You and the rest of the pirates arrived at a small town, each house was covered in snow. The warm feeling this gave you was nostalgic. This was your home. This was your island. Nothing has changed since you left all those years ago.

Kidd glared over at you, noticing your joyous face. He looked away quickly before your eyes can meet his. Killer stepped in front of the captain, getting your full attention.

"If you don't mind," The large blonde started, "I know of a small pasta restaurant in this town. We can all go." He tried to hide the excitement in his voice. It worked, but only a little. Kidd started at him, slowly rolling his eyes, and waved him off.

"Fine, I don't give a damn, this is [y/n]'s home anyway. If any of you idiots decide to mess around and fuck stuff up without my say so. I'll personally hunt you down a kill you. Got it?!" The men nodded and quickly made their way into the village. Each of them had a list of supplies to search for.

As for you, Killer, and Kidd; made your way through the town, getting small stuff on the way to the restaurant. You and Killer shared a few laughs here and there. Your eyes glittered happily as the lights grew brighter with every shop you looked into. The village you stayed at was small, but each mason and tier that housed each shop brought back many memories for you. You would tell the large men behind you the meaning and the stories of each shop. Kidd, not seeming so interested in the stories at all, softened his expression. Noting how happy this makes you, returning to where you came from.

Killer would slightly cut you off from time to time to ask you small questions. Kidd didn't seem to like that; "Hey!" He scolded softly, startling you and shutting the blonde up, "I get that you're interested in the stories [y/n] is sayin', but let them at least finish it, huh?.." This shocked not only Killer but you. Since when was he so interested, let alone polite when it comes to others? Ah, you're his crewmate. That's why. "Hey!" He shouted at you, waving his hand in your face, "Are you going to continue or what? I'm starting to get hungry here!"

You shook yourself out of your thoughts and nodded, smiling warmly at him, "Ah, sorry cap'n!" He blinked and looked to the side, slightly blushing in anger. "Whatever..just keep fucking talking, shrimp!" You nodded your head and turned around leading them to the restaurant. Pointing to shops, answering Killer's questions, and telling nostalgia-filled stories until something stopped you in your tracks.

Killer stopped a few inches behind you, the same with Kidd. You felt your whole body go cold. The only thing you honestly hoped to not see here were your ex-crewmates. The memories of your old captain and you having a slight fling were lost in the deepest part of your mind. You wanted to forget all that... Foreplay that eventually leads to other things, thinking of it made your stomach do flips. Of course, at the time you were okay with it, but eventually, you started to understand that he would spread lies and gossip about your privacy to the other men. Leading them to ask you to come and warm their beds. In short, you had enough of the slander and were seeing yourself off but was stopped. Your captain, drunker than days, came to you.

"What's wrong with ya? I thought we talked about you leaving the crew and me. You're not going anywhere, right?" He hissed softly, trying to act as worried and sad as possible. You gritted your teeth and took a few steps back, "I don't want to be here anymore. I'm tired of being treated like a slave! I'm a pirate, not a person to pass around!" You growled in anger. Your captain was not pleased with this at all. The guilt tripping didn't seem to work, and he quickly noticed that minus his drunken state. Quickly, he grabbed ahold of your shirt, slamming you to the wall and onto the floor. You were too stunned to act, your breath quickly left your lungs.

'This can't end this way, I can't die like this! I can't die like this!!" You spat in his face, thrashing as much as you can trying to break free of his grip. He straddled you, his weight almost seeming like it was too much for you to handle. He quickly grabbed both of your wrists with one of his hands but failed. You took that as a chance to quickly grabbed the bottle he had and smash it against his head. Sending the man to fall on his side. You laid there for a few seconds to catch your breath, then quickly hopped to your feet and headed for the upper deck. The crewmates were too distracted by the noise and ran to the room where the unconscious captain lay. Your running start was enough for you to grab a small dingy off the side of the boat, drop down into the sea, and hastily paddle away. But of course, the men saw what had happened and quickly started to fire everything they had at you. You paddled as much as you could, all this noise could attract a starving beast, but before you were in the clear. A canon ball managed to nick your dingy and send you flying. What a way to go, huh?

Everything after that seemed so fuzzy, all you remembered was being dragged out of the water and loud talking. When you opened your eyes, you were greeted by a loud, flaming redhead. Later down the line, he became your new captain; after heavy trust exercises of course.

(but back to the story)

Your eyes met your old captain. He glared at you but soon did a double take. "Weeell~" He purred, "If it isn't my old crewmate, how is everything [y/n]?~" He strolled over to you, not minding the men behind you. "What 'cha doing back here? Did you miss us?" You didn't say anything. "Not talking? Are you scared or something? We all honestly thought you died...frankly, everyone in the village thought you died. At least that's what we told them.~" You gritted your teeth, anger started to bubble in your chest. Before you could say anything, two hands were placed on each of your shoulders.

"Killer, I don't know about you, but it seems like these assholes are giving our crewmate a hard time," Kidd smirked mischievously, Killer did nothing but give a slow nod. "Hey, if I were you...I'd take your lousy crew and leave." Kidd glared down at the old captain, who only laughed and stepped closer. This caused the two men to pull you back behind them.

"And what if I don't?" Your old captain mocked. Kidd's eye twitched in annoyance. "No worries then," Kidd began, "I'll just have to sick my men on you...and your pathetic crew. Killer, why don't you give this man a small taste of what the Kidd Pirates can do."

Killer's heavy footsteps crunched on the snow-covered pavement. Kidd turned around and placed you under his arm, leading you back to the ship. "Let Killer handle those idiots. Those fools picked the wrong crew to mess with." You didn't say anything but looked over your shoulder, seeing a glistening spray of blood on the fresh snow. Quickly, you turned your head. "Now...tell me why you just stopped talking? What the hell did those guys do to you?" You blinked, slightly grabbing ahold of your shirt, and let out a shaky breath. Soon, once you managed to mustard up the courage. You told your captain all of it, everything, and every last detail. This wasn't the story he necessarily wanted to hear from you or his crewmate.

"For a captain to take advantage of his crewmate like that, is sickening...I'm calling my men back." He stood up in a huff and turned, stomping out of the room and onto the main deck. He yelled out loudly to each of his men. "Alright!! Now that I have your attention. Imma need every last one of you to find a certain captain that resides on this island. Killer is already scaring him. If you find Killer, have him lead you to the body. Beat him to the brink of death, find the rest of his crew, and do the same! And hey, if they manage to try and bribe you with any treasure. Take it and kill them!! He hurt one of us, it's time for a little bit of payback, yeah?" The men he managed to gather from his grew cheered and race off to savagely hunt. Heat and Wire were left, placing all the supplies they found in the storage room.

"Imma need you two to go with Killer and destroy that man's ship. Burn it and don't leave a damn trace, got it?" Heat nods his head, sending off a wave before he leaves. "Wire...make sure they have it done in a good time. I want to leave this damn place before it causes us more trouble." The tall man nods and follows Heat. Kidd looks back at you, his face was still annoyed and pissed as ever, but he softened it as much as he can.

"What happened, wasn't right. That man is paying for what he did. Now that you're here and on my crew. I'll keep you safe, I'm sure you can handle yourself," He sat down beside you, sighing softly as he relaxed, "but sometimes... it's okay to let other people handle something. Take care of yourself for a bit alright? I don't need you moping around and such in my sight! Take care of yourself, damn it!! And that's an order!.." He barked loudly. Slowly, shifting his gaze over to you. Seeing your slight nod pained him for some reason. "Damn it all...man-" He growled lowly and pulled you into his arm. Shocking you, but soon you melted into the hug and softly cried into it. "Your health of all kinds is important to us...don't feel bad about anything. You're safer now, please...please.." He nuzzled into your neck, "Just take as long as you need. You're a pirate...but you're also one of us, now and forever."

========================================

thank you all so much for coming! I always appreciate the support for my silly little stories!~ this one took a bit out of me, but I love my punk boy so much!~ I hope you all enjoyed it, see you next time with Mr. Mihawk!~ 🍷✨

twitter

wattpad

[wellnoe]

I would like to know more about Scott relationship with his dad and mom? Is there anything about his mom that we know of? Does Scott remember her? And how do Alex and Scott differ in their attachment to their father? Too many questions but I never considered it.

hello!!!

last question first: alex had a much less fraught relationship with corsair than scott did. this is largely because scott and corsair have different views on violence and what it means to lead a team (uncanny x-men #154-155) and because scott's childhood was horrible, and he desperately wished to be rescued from it by a parent. learning that corsair was out there, just not willing to come to save him, is devastating to him (uncanny x-men #155, uncanny x-men #391). alex has to engage with both these things less.

also i feel their introduction to corsair plays a role. scott's introduction to corsair as his father was drawn out and hectic, colored by the fact that corsair, jean, and ororo were keeping the fact that corsair was scott's dad a secret from him and that scott learned this after corsair crash-landed on the x-men's lawn, bringing a bunch of murderous aliens with him. meanwhile alex's introduction to the idea that corsair is his dad is this:

[uncanny x-men #158, id in ALT]

much less tense!

anyway these days scott and his dad are on more consistently better terms. my impression is this can be partially traced to the greg rucka cyclops (2014) mini, which i have read very little of.

stuff about scott's mom: we know very little. her name was katherine ann. she was sexually assaulted once the shi'ar captured her and corsair, and subsequently killed to punish corsair (classic x-men #15). she's consistently portrayed as the one who gave scott and alex the parachute. the extent to which scott remembers his childhood pre-crash varies, but the consensus is not a lot. uncanny x-men #144 (one of my FAVORITE issues) reads to me as if this is the first time he's really held on to a solid memory of the crash?

in uncanny x-men #154 he cannot fully recognize his mother's face, though he does describe her as 'familiar'. he does the same when he sees an image of her as he's dying in uncanny x-men #175:

the most we get of katherine is probably in prelude to schism #3. in this issue, scott describes katherine helping him as he goes through medical tests to determine the source of his headaches. he says he sometimes forgets what her face looks like. he also says he still thinks of her when things get tough. he ends the issue by saying leading requires never letting go, a phrase he repeats throughout the issue in relation to katherine.

[ventiswampwater]

Bo and Lester Sinclair

AHHHHHHH, the stinky men themselves 🦍 + 🐀!!!

disclaimer: imo, any situation in which u "date" either of these two men would have to be predicated on some absolute tomfuckery and a hostage-type situation. LMAO. I see no other conceivable world where you'd just........run into them and have a normal ass relationship jhfdsjhfjdshjsdf they are so deeply ABNORMAL. so warnings for stockholm syndrome/dubcon headcanons below!!

once again under the cut bc a bitch truly does TALK

feel free to send me a character of ur choice for headcanons and I'll give u 3 pros and 3 cons of dating them. if ur so inclined!!!!

boseph

sidenote: I've been on a sabbatical from Him™ recently. he's been on the backburner. I've been hoovering down DIFFERENT fictional shlong. HAPPILY. so tell me why I was scrollin thru these gifs of him goin yum yum there he IS HIIIIII BABY hehehehe muy deliciosio. ?????? so fuckin embarrassing!!!!!!!!!!

ANYWAY.

3 PROS

dick game is fucking immaculate. I HATE to fuckin say it. literally crying screaming THROWING TF UP. bc come on. I'd LOVE. more than anything. to tell u with CONFIDENCE that it's subpar. but I'd be fuckin lying to u AND myself. and the gods would smite my fuckin ass from existence. so yeah. it's good. u know. the kinda dick game where he absolutely does not care if this feels good 4 u. and it's mean and awful............but somehow it's makin u astral project into 328798329832 different galaxies. it's SUCH a fuckin shame. smh.

despite being a FAKE ASS LARPING "mechanic", I genuinely do think he's handy and knows his way around vehicles/how to fix things. he's very much a car guy. <-this is also a CON. have u met a CAR GUY before??? immediate no. but I'm considering it a pro. bc u will definitely have to bring him sweet tea down to his stupid shop one summer afternoon. and the garage doors will be wide open and he'll be blasting korn or slipknot or some shit. and he'll be workin on a car engine in a slutty wifebeater with a slutty lil rag tucked into his slutty lil belt loop. and he'll be sweaty and covered in grease and annoying. he'll complain about how ur interrupting his work. and then u get banged on the hood of the car bc he's a skank. so it's a pro.

I just feel like he smells G O O D. like. AS MUCH as I call him stinky. I unfortunately think he consistently smells good. like. the kinda smell that makes ur brain go ooga booga cavewoman-mode and forget ur basic motor functions. sigh sigh SMH

3 CONS

EVERYTHING I HAVE EVER WRITTEN FOR THIS LOSER

MEAN dom (this is also. regrettably. a pro)

it would be SO fun to peg him. u will never peg him.

mommy issues out the fuckin WAZOO. daddy issues too. every issue in the fuckin book. get ready 2 be seen less as a person and more as a weird conglomeration mishmash projected fantasy-nightmare. he's dedicated his whole adult life to maintaining a murdertown in his beloved mama's memory. his mother also fucking hated him. he's very aware of that. recreates and sexualizes his trauma to feel better about all that. yikes!!!!!!!!!! YIKES!!!!!!!!!!

lester

3 PROS

full of boundless enthusiasm!! genuinely interested in what u have to say!! will happily talk to u for hours about whatever dumb shit u have boppin around ur brain!! most ppl are usually unsettled by him (honestly, for valid reasons LMAO. I mean. he IS leading u to certain doom in his big bro's helltown), so having someone around who doesn't treat him like an oddity has him BUZZING.

he's a v strange but thoughtful gift-giver. I definitely see him as the kinda guy to randomly give u weird lil trinkets. like here u go. he whittled down this wood into the shape of a catfish for u. he's coming over to present u with a bizarre taxidermied raccoon w/a frilled dress and tiara. both the dress and tiara are made of recycled chip bags and six-pack rings. u love it

I feel like he makes a MEAN gumbo. u wouldn't even know it's made of lizard tails and alligator eyeballs. unless he told u. which he will. w/a huge grin while ur mid-mouthful

3 CONS

actually LITERALLY stinky. like. RANCID. DIS-COS-TANG. I'm not discounting the fact that he takes baths in like. a metal tub in his backyard w/dial soap. from time to time. but come on. he's a bit putrid. a bit foul.

I v much feel that he hasn't navigated a lot (if any) normal adult relationships. so get ready for some pie-in-the-sky goofy affection that skews pretty immature. he means well, but there's a lot of cognitive dissonance and general weirdness there. he's hardly been shown any good representations on how relationships should work, so his interpretation is...................boyish. and strange

I.........feel like he's clingy. just. smthn about him. as happy-go-lucky as he might appear, he's v liable of getting his feelings hurt if he feels like ur pulling away/losing interest in him. all the sinclair boys are pretty DEEPLY maladjusted lmao. I could see him being the type of personality to sulk around. he's the baby of the family after all. just a lil guy (affectionate) (derogatory)

[scleracentipede]

I'd love more info about the individual system members! I also think a full list of ND headcanons for your Jon and Eddie would be cool too! Again, no pressure and thanks so much!!

tysm for clarifying! imma post some art about the different Scarecrow system members today so I’ll list some ND headcanons for ya now ☺️

Putting under a read more cos this got long!

Scarecrow

Scarecrow, as you know, I headcanon as having DID and by extension CPTSD because lets be real their childhood was horrid

He struggles alot with dissocaitive amensia and would probably say that is the part of his mental health he finds the most 'disabling'

He's spent a lot of his life dissociating from any strong emotion be that positive or negative and can barely remember happy moments let alone sad one (e.g., he can't remember getting his doctorate etc.) followed closely by their frequent flashbacks which manifest as bodily feeling flashbacks rather then actual memories.

Thier autistic and very unashamed of it.

Suprisingly were diagnosed in childhood despite the general neglect they faced but this was not a positive thing for them (see their Granny tried to 'fix it')

He never really therefore had like an autism discovery like some later diagnosed people and his response to being autistic was just kind of "Okay then."

He is not very 'good' with social stuff and gets overstimmed extremely easily leading to alot of angry outbursts that others precieve as 'temper tantrums' but he's geniunely in agony from the sensory inputs around him and the response is actually porpotional to what he's experiencing. (Wild right? Autistic people's 'irrational' responses might actually be rational to their experiences /sarcasm)

They are all stimming all the time because otherwise they'll scream but the way they stim varies between the alters in their system and isn't always the safest stim (what I mean by this is some of their stims cause them bodily harm but I don't like calling those 'bad' because that's very shaming)

Alot of people around them assume they don't experience empathy and there's definitely times where they have low empathy but they also experience very intense empathy to people their close to, to animals, and objects they just can't communicate this externally

Thier empathy for objects is very strong and why they fix so many items they find (that art piece 'Can't Help Myself' by Sun Yuang and Peng Yu left them catatonic with an intense grief and empathy for like a week)

He gets very focused on things and overall struggles to take care of himself any meaningful way without support. Like he will forget to eat or clean himself till he gets very stick from it without prompting and support

He likely needs a carer to help but doesn't have one and has to rely on his few friends when their free to keep him alive which does not help with his feelings of guilt and he'll often push people away so their not 'burdened' by him and so they don't feel bad for leaving him to rot.

In reality, his friends do not find it a burden at all and actually enjoy his company when he lets them.

He helps them all much more then he realises but he's stubborn like an ox and won't here it (e.g., helping him gives Jervis a schedule and routine that helps him remember more grounded and Jons company makes him very happy)

He has alot of support needs that often go unmet but he is loved and not a failure for that

Not ND but disability related is they definitely have physical health issues too

Specifically Ehlers-Dahlos Syndrome (like me!) and Marfan Syndrome

They have alot of joint pain, dizziness, nausea, and fatigue that contributes them get overstimmed quicker

They self medicate for this alot becuase they cannot afford how expensive healthcare is in Gotham so are usually a little stoned but that does help get less overstimmed so win-win

He's great to have as a friend to because he always baby apsrin (incase his heart plays up), nausea meds, and weed on him.

Edward

Edward has been misdiagnosed and rediagnosed so many times at this point hes skeptical about what actually applies to him so tends to just say hes neurodivergent if asked

As a child he was just labelled as 'petulant know it all' and got told he 'could be great if he'd just apply himself' in school

He's been diagnosed with the following over the years: basically every cluster b personality disorder depending on the doctor, autism, ADHD, autism and adhd, dyspraxia, brief psychotic disorder, OCD etc.

He personally finds AuDHD and OCD to be the most accurate and isn't sure what name you can give to his mood swings but he is relucantly willing to acknowledge that his emotional response seems inappropriate to situations

His complusions can be very dangerous and have lead to him being quite injured though with age he's got better at redirecting himself to do less harm to himself or reducing how much he needs to do something

He's found additional coping strategies like wearing gloves all the time to reduce his contamination fears that have been super helpful too

He's very fidgety and struggles to sit still and is often heard mumbling and talking to himself as a form of stimming (which one of Scarecrow's system finds very soothing actually like a particularly clever hyperlexic white noise machine)

His coordination isn't the best which frustrates him when he's trying to build his puzzles and leads to him relucantly, so very relucantly, asking for assistance from Echo and Query or in what he sees as the worse case scenario Jervis Tetch if its something more technical

He has hypergraphia and is always drawing and writing on things often feeling like his brain is too full and he needs to get it out

He struggles with some auditory halluncinations and occasional visual ones if he's spiralling (not going to share what because it can be triggering to people with hallucinations to read about)

He struggles alot with body image issues constantly trying to look 'perfect' so he seems more in controll then he feels as he's is terrfied of people realising how much of a fraud his confident exterior is

His weight flucuatates alot with the different medication he takes for his mental health and with his hrt which causes him some distress

Basically any change he cannot control upsets him

More physical disability headcanons: He actually needs his cane as he struggles with fibromyalgia and POTS so needs it to help relieve leg pain and for balance

He does water aerobics as a gentle excercise that helps with his pain (he thinks Scarecrow would benefit from it but he refuses to go with him - it would be so nice on his joints!)

Edward actually experiences alot more low empathy then Scarecrow and had to teach himself sympathy because he did not understand others at all when they were upset or happy

He's quite touch avoidant and isn't sure why (probably trauma Edward) because he often feels like he is so desparate to be hugged that he has been hollowed out with a melon bawler

In addition he often feels very nervous around other men especailly when they get aloud or drunk (once again trauma) so often ends up with closer friendships with the women in his life like Echo Query or the Gotham Sirens who often joke that he is their diversity man hire.

I hope you enjoyed my ramblings!

[alexandermanes]

hi. hello, if you haven’t seen good omens’ last season (and you want to) you can sit this one out (or come back to it later i don’t know)

are they gone? good. so

*lights up a metaphorical cigarette* how are we feeling about that finale, huh?

well, i certainly do have thoughts about it.

let’s start with the elephant in the room shall we? was it in character for them to act like they did in the last 10 minutes? yes

let’s start with crowley. upon hearing the earth-shattering news that he and aziraphale might have not been communicating properly in the last six thousand years, what does he do? he thinks about it and flips out a little, cue to the rash little confession that was rudely (not really!) interrupted. and evidently, it’s par for the course that it was interrupted by the worst possible news he could have ever received. (well…)

because really, who could have thought that aziraphale would refuse to run away with him again? who would've thought aziraphale would choose heaven again? actually, at any other opportunity aziraphale might've not (i’m pretty sure) refused his proposal. but crowley's timing couldn’t have been worse. anyways, it hits the nail on the head of their issues.

because faced with an opportunity he couldn’t miss, of course, aziraphale chose what he believed was the right thing, though, as usual, his overall well-being came in second. and to even ask crowley to go to heaven with him, to restore heaven and be restored as angel is such naivety. such naivety of aziraphale to think crowley would accept that, regardless of his feelings towards aziraphale himself. which is pretty much in character. crowley doesn’t believe it to be possible: to restore heaven, to make it better. and what’s more is that he feels as though he was wronged (he was) and isn't willing to forgive and forget (he shouldn’t be, not in this case). where aziraphale is all about being good and doing good, crowley is all about self preservation.

where aziraphale is all about seing the best in everyone, crowley would doubt his own shadow if possible. so, that means that he can't ask crowley to put (blind or otherwise) faith in the place that cast him down for asking questions (!!!). but if aziraphale was even to have considered crowley could put his personal feelings towards heaven aside in the name of doing the right thing, crowley wouldn't. he didn't.

because crowley doesn't owe heaven a thing. more than that, he doesn't trust the angels in charge. he doesn't need them, neither does aziraphale. he'd said it as much.

but to aziraphale this is isn't about needing heaven necessarily, it's about what heaven should stand for. the metatron puts all sorts of ideas in his head about making a difference and, fundamentally, i refuse to believe that this is him striving for power, since never in six thousand years has he shown any interest in leading or climbing up the celestial business ladder.

so improving heaven it is. besides kindess and positivity, aziraphale cares about his comfort. he really does care about humans and the earth (he wouldn't have bothered with stopping the armageddon otherwise) but, he also likes the comfort and simple pleasures that the planet provides. he doesn't strike me as the kind of guy that would overthrow gabriel, or the metatron, for that matter, just so that he can rule over heaven and earth (and possibly hell). he wants to help, even if does inconvenience him a bit. which comes back to the issue: crowley doesn't see things the same way he does. crowley cares about the earth and the humans that inhabit it, that much is obvious, but he does care a lot more about himself. more accurately, he cares about keeping himself alive and preferably out of harm's way. the whole issue with gabriel shows us that much. it's also fair to point out that maybe he was more than a little insistent about keeping gabriel away from them since it was gabriel that showed up on aziraphale's doorway naked and devoid of any memories, and not any other angel who hadn't told aziraphale!crowley to shut-up-and-die-already.

he is also self-aware enough that he knows his feelings towards aziraphale aren't purely platonic. so, faced with the possibility that he had wasted time in not telling aziraphale how he really feels, he also wants to be away from anything that might, at best, be nuisance and, at worst, put them in danger. “we're a team, a group. a group of the two of us, and we've spent our existence pretending we aren't"

to me it also indicates that, not only is he conscious about his feelings towards aziraphale, he believes aziraphale might reciprocate them (which he does, though, based on solid evidence, i.e his living experience, crowley isn't 100% confident about it). and, even though, he is heaving and terrified of being vulnerable (and rejected!), crowley, in a very i-better-say-my-piece-now-or-i'll-forever-be-silent way makes his little speech. bravely so.

"just be an us. you and me. what do you say?"

this is mostly stream of conscioussness, so i forgot to mention that despite being all about self-preservation, crowley makes a very generous exception for aziraphale. he will do the impossible as long as he can keep aziraphale safe. it goes without saying that he won't do or let anything jeopardize the precious, peaceful, fragile existence he had carved out for himself, unless he has to.

"come with me. to heaven, i'll run it, you'll be my second in command", says aziraphale it makes me insane that this rift that is spreading now in their relationship isn't due to any emotional confusion (not in any way that matters); this is about them operating in a different framework and not being able to translate it to the other one. crowley wants to be safe and run away with aziraphale, aziraphale wants to do good and have crowley by his side. neither of them is willing to give that up. and even if i think crowley is in the right, that heaven can't be fixed and it's not up to aziraphale to fix it, if they talked, if they communicated this wouldn't be such a huge issue.

"you can't leave this bookshop", you can't leave me

"oh, crowley. nothing lasts forever", it's time for a change, will you come with me?

"no. no, i suppose it doesn't", so much for being honest about my feelings and what i want

(crowley putting his sunglasses back on, hiding his eyes that are beacon of emotion was such a powerful move btw) where aziraphale had hope, crowley's withered and died.

"crowley, come back! come to heaven, work with me. we can be together."

now, this part kills me because aziraphale says it with such hope, it's hard for me to even think of it as being a temptation (even if it sounds like one). it's clear that aziraphale isn't rejecting crowley as a romantic prospect, but he is rejecting his proposal. and, as stated before, crowley isn't interested in his either.

"angels. doing good."

the first time i watched this scene it felt like a punch to the gut. it felt like that probably because i'd heard it the same way crowley did: i want you, but only if you're something other than what you are. because you see, even if crowley was restored as an angel, he would still be fundamentally crowley, but he wouldn't be a demon. nevertheless, being a demon is also a fundamental part of who he is. i-don't-know-how-many-thousands-of-years since the fall and six thousand years living as a demon, of course it's part of who he is. plus, crowley sees himself as irredeemable, and theoretically, in the eyes of god and the angels, he is. there's no saving him, and even if there was, he wouldn't be interested in it.

but in saying that, aziraphale hadn't meant he would only want crowley if he wasn't a demon. he meant that being an angel would make crowley happy. if we are to believe that they had met when both were still angels, having witnessed crowley's delight in helping create the universe, he thought being an angel made him happy. he already knows with bone-deep certainty that crowley is good, he has witnessed it for thousands of years. therefore, 1 + 1 = 2: crowley being an angel in heaven with aziraphale would make him happy again. heaven could be a good place again with the both of them restoring it side by side.

"i need you!"

there's so much to unpack there, i don't think i have the ability to make it justice.

crowley's hesitance also is so interesting. for all intents and purposes he has already rejected aziraphale's proposal, so why does he linger? if you ask me, it's almost like he is either waiting for aziraphale to convince him into acquiescence, or he hopes aziraphale will change his mind. how, you ask me? i don't know.

"i don't think you understand what i'm offering you", i'm offering you my love, a chance at doing the right thing, i'm offering you happiness again

"i understand. and i understand a whole lot better than you do." you can't fix something that can't be fixed.

"then, there's nothing more to say"

and the irony is: there were so many things left unsaid that needed to be said. and yet...

"you idiot, we could've been us."

and that's the thing, isn't it? crowley doesn't need themto be in any way other than what they are. well, with the added tones of romance and wine-and-dining, of course. but, he just wants them to be, together. outside of the restraints of heaven and hell.

god, and the kiss. the awful, dreaded kiss that i saw from a mile away. it was so revolting and visceral in its suplication. it was beautiful, it was horrible. i think it's a work of art, i hate it so much. crowley grappling aziraphale by his lapels, aziraphale not knowing whether to bring him closer or push him away, the sheer duration of the kiss, the devastation in their eyes afterwards... jesus christ.

the kiss was done out of sheer desperation on crowley's part, and i don't really know what was going through his head tbh. i don't know if he thought the kiss was supposed to mend the rift they essentially created between themselves or if it was his well-if-it's-my-last-chance-to-do-it moment. i'm leaning towards the first option though; crowley thought the kiss might've convinced aziraphale to change his mind, but instead...

"i forgive you", a final temptation you have applied on me.

"don't bother", i gues we don't want the same things after all.

i don't think holy water or hellfire could've burned them this much.

and then: aziraphale hesitates and for a singular moment there i was convinced he was going after crowley and apologize, confess. but then, of course, he didn't.

it's funny, i didn't think a man could have made so many facial expressions in the span of ten seconds (devastation, hurt, anger, sorrow, sobriety) and yet, michael sheen is a master at his craft. well, after all was said and done (literally), crowley still waited, aziraphale still hesitated. our very own orpheus and eurydice.

what a tragedy. in conclusion, i'm unwell.

[noihavenosanitythanksforasking]

so I finished link click s2 yesterday and i'm losing my mind

So imma ramble

alrigh so when powers are activated, the user's eyes turn a different color. cxc's/whoever he is possessing(?) turn gold, Li Tianchen's turn red, (I assume smth happens to tianxi's eyes too, but it could just be that she needs to have her eyes closed as thats the only way we see her. Though it could be that her eyes turn milky like Qiao Ling's do after tianxi's death). Anyways so when lu guang activates his power his eyes turn blue. But allegedly, he's been going into the past over and over again to try and save cxc. This is confusing to me. If Lu Guang has been through this timeline multiple times over and over, would he not know whats going on already? Even if things do change every timeline, after going through a certain amount of times an incredible amount of time, its easily plausible that the changes that would occur wouldn't be too hard to predict. Like Lu Guang said multiple times in season 1(i forget where) time has these node things which i think of as like check points in time. The way the explanation made sense in my head was almost like some sort of binary code. The Node either happens or not. So with this reasoning if lu guang when through the time line enough times to create every possible combination of these happened or it didn't happen moments, he would be able to "predict" the future. (that would also mean that lu guang is suuuper old because there are so many of these checkpoints that could happen in 4 years) Anyways, at this point im not sure what i believe about lu guang's ability anymore. If he's gone through the timeline so many times, couldn't he just have the knowledge of whats going to happen in each photo through his connection with cxc? His eyes turn blue, and we see flashes of the photo, but how do we know that its not just his memories from a past timeline.

Speaking of memories from a past timeline. Does qiao ling have all Lu guangs memories? That wouldn't make sense at all and if she doesn't why did she see the one of cxc dying? Was it because it was particularly traumatic? Why that particular one because allegedly cxc has died multiple times.

also-

my current theory about the death thing is that the node isn't necessarily for one person, but just a death in general. For example, in this timeline, Li tianxi died and cxc lived. but if cxc died would tianxi also die? in the scene where cxc is trying to talk emma out of unaliving herself, lu guang gets all surprised that it seems to be working(also side note, talk about trauma. give the boy hope and snatch it away) but she ends up dying anyways. What if the only way to save someone from dying in the past is to kill someone else. So if emma lives, cxc would have to die. And bc cxc is a self sacrificial idiot I could see him doing that to save someone else, possibly on accent but i could see on purpose too. (Lu Guang ofc wouldn't let him do this cause he's in love with him but i digress)

Which leads me me to another idea, which is the scene where Lu Guang gets stabbed right.

He was not expecting that from what I can tell. But he accepted it. Almost like he was thinking that maybe him dying in this time line would save cxc from death. It didn't work, bc he survived but still. Lu Guang getting stabbed must have been a node he hadn't come across before, which means that he had to go in blind for the entirety of season 2. This contradicts my Lu Guang power theory but that wasn't a super strong theory anyways so idk.

One of my main questions is why the hell wouldn't lu guang just do smth about tianchen before it becomes a problem. Even if he didn't come across the node of him getting stabbed before, he would still know whats going on to some extent and be able stop it right? Unless my idea about cxc sacrificing himself was the real main issue. (which will make me cry if thats true i will not survive)

Also last side note, where did lu guang originally come from? If he just popped up in their lives because he was trying to save cxc, how did they meet originally?

simple answer: he's god.

idk if any of that made sense.