#AND THEYRE GRADED. IS THERE NO PEACE.

[transxfiles]

girl i just spent ~3 hours completing a math packet of 5 questions...............................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................

[calware]

JOHN: that's kind of a weird question, but sure, i'll answer, haha.

JOHN: it's kind of funny, when i was a kid it really confused me when dirk would talk about "ante diulivan terminology" and all that. that stuff seemed so important to me when i was younger, like if someone was gay or what ever, but it really doesn't matter after all this time has passed. being a god for hundreds of years really puts stuff into perspective, i guess. JOHN: but my identity has definitely changed since i was that age. JOHN: back then, manhood always felt like an inevitability. i was going to become a man, like my dad, like every other boy does. and i was okay with that, in the same way we're all okay with breathing. like, what else is there to do? we don't question it. JOHN: so it took me a REALLY long time to really get that it wasn't that way, and that there were no inevitabilities. like my whole life i'm on this path walking toward a destination, but after walking it for a hundred years, it starts dawning on you that there is no destination on that path. JOHN: just the journey. JOHN: you can't see it but i am making a very wise expression right now. JOHN: not to be confused with harry anderson, a very different wise guy who has stood the test of time. JOHN: just wanted you to know that. JOHN: any way, after that, i started to understand that i could do things on my own terms. i'm not bound to masculinity, or anything at all really. JOHN: i don't know if it has something to do with my classpect, but i like to imagine it's like the breeze. it just does its own thing, traveling regardless of any path. it's freeing. JOHN: so i don't care what you call me, really. JOHN: for gender stuff, i mean. i'm still not attracted to guys. JOHN: but i don't care if you call me straight or a lesbian? so i guess i don't really care about that either. JOHN: it's more complicated than that, but i'm not going to get into it when none of it is really accurate to me anyway. JOHN: like i said, it doesn't feel important anymore.

[microwavetoaster-selfships]

Send me good wishes yall. I'm going to try and work on some late work when I get home but I'm chronically bad at doing that without an energy drink but I'm not ready for the impending doom of selling my soul to energy drinks so I can function

Uuhhhhhhhhh I accidentally went on a tangent and there's a whole vent in the tags oopsies

[denkies]

Infodumping in my mutuals dms as a form of affection, like a cat bumping their head against you <3

[mashpotatoe]

im a white jew, i was born in israel,

ive lived there all my life and was brought up in an environment that fosters racism driven by nationalism, nationalism driven by racism.

in israel, they teach you jews and muslims (though usually, they just say arabs) have always been enemies, the same way the US deems the entire middle east as a inherent war zone, ridding them of the responsibility for perpetuating war in thst region.

they tell you "were the fair and humane side who strives for peace! its the arabs who never accept the offer!"

i remember the first time i began doubting that sentiment was in fourth grade, when we were having a discussion in class about the character of Saul from the Torah. the teacher was talking about how Saul, the first monarch of the Kingdom of Israel, used to fight the Philistines, and when she added that the Philistines were the natural enemy of the Israelites, she asked the class what group of people is their modern equivalent to which everyone very eagerly replied "Arabs!" and nevermind that there in that same class sat two arab boys, one of whom sat next to me, who i looked at and thought "but he isnt my enemy? hes just a boy in my class."

they teach you to hate arabs. sometimes they say it outright. sometimes they say it more carefully, or make a distinction between good and bad arabs, those who are with us and those who are against us.

in a state based on the idea of (white) jewish supremacy, they teach you jews are naturally superior. they use the conspiratorial narrative of "jews controlling the world" to their favor, giving their own watered down explanation for why antisemitism exists, saying that it must be driven by jealousy.

the zionist movement always used antisemitism to its advantage, either for reinforcing the notion of jewish supremacy or appealing to the real pain and trauma of generations, people who survived the holocaust, connecting them to stolen land where they are "guaranteed" safety ergo granting "justification" for the suffering of others.

its using peoples real pain that makes fear mongering so effective, and when the israeli population grows up being told all of their neighboring countries want to kill them, they quickly get defensive of the "only land where they can feel safe", but the only explanation ever provided for Why these neighboring countries are considered enemies is because theyre arabs.

and when it comes to palestine, it isnt even recognized as a country, nor identity. just a threat. ive talked to many people who are genuinely unaware of the occupation, and they arent willing to believe it either, because the media narrative has successfully shifted the blame on hamas. because "how could it be us? we want peace! its the terrorists who make us look bad! and their children, they grow up to be antisemites*, might as well get rid of them too!" they never stop to think what environment these children must grow up in to develop these "radical" ideas.

* what they mean by antisemite is really just antizionist, but the term anti/zionist isnt practiced in local dialect, being a zionist is treated as a given

any jew who stands against israels oppression is dubbed a self hating jew, but the biggest contributors to antisemitism is the people in charge of an ethnostate, because at any moment they could decide who is not white enough to be jewish, who is too jewish to be white, who stood against the current coalition government and who is an obedient dog.

israelis arent a monolith, but many of them have been won over, convinced its an "us v them" situation, when in reality it could never be the "us" that "loses"

the israeli government was waiting for an event like the massacre on the seventh of october to declare war, to have the so called "right to defend itself", so they could initiate the final steps of an ethnic genocide and displace, if not kill, all remaining palestinians. under the guise of bringing peace.

it isnt too late to call for a permanent ceasefire, to end the occupation.

please contact your representatives, attend protests and rallies if you are able. palestine will be free, and the flowers will rise again.

[mediumgayitalian]

fic rec friday 16

hi!! welcome to fic rec friday. every week, i pick five fics i have bookmarked and rec them with a little review. check them out!

best friend, baby by @ghosttotheparty*

“You— You make me feel so… good,” he finishes lamely, his head void of any words that could describe it, because how can Will describe the peace he finds in Nico’s presence, or the way he feels like he can finally breathe whenever Nico looks into his eyes? “You’re my favourite person,” he breathes. “My best friend.”

hooooooo boy the intimacy tag was NOT joking. i was gagged. yall tell me all the time how high u value will angst and like....this one DEVASTATED me for him??? like do yall ever think about how the first dialogue we hear from will in nico's perspective is self-loathing. yall ever think about how nico has always known him hating himself. well this author did. "i know you hate yourself but just because you hate yourself doesnt mean everyone else does too" hey what if we FOUGHT. also im going back in to all my FRFs to star my FAVE FAVE FAVE fics bc this is one of them LET ME TELL YOU.

2. just a dumb game by @ghosttotheparty

Nico di Angelo is not a party person. But Will Solace is going to be there. So.

they are SO FUCKING GAY and SO FUCKING IN LOVE and SO FUCKING STUPID. god i love them so fucking bad like they are inherently down bad obsessed with each other and this is how they should be. this is the way of the world.

3. even in the silver light by @ghosttotheparty

Nico is back. Will is still smitten.

first of all. latino and nb will. thank you. second of all. i am (obviously) obsessed with this author bc they KILLLLLL w burning intimacy. like you have no idea they write them like there is a twice burning fire only alive within them it's CRAZZZYYY. i also fckn LOVE that this is like. okay so the author says its plotless and it is kind of 45k of plotless, yes, but idk theres something to be said of love as a plot?? of learning and loving each other as a storyline.

4. splash by @ghosttotheparty

Annabeth is reading her favourite book. Someone walks directly into her.

yeah okay i think this is another one author week. sue me. this fic made me GRIN okay. it was so fucking cute and sweet and soft and autistic annabeth my beloved!! my love and light!! they are so in love in every universe fr and i fckn LOVE them dude i am OBSESSED. when this author writes people together it's as if you can hear them click.

5. isnt she lovely by @ghosttotheparty

Their eyes always meet in the halls. Her eyes are grey and shiny, and they make Percy think of stormy skies and marble sculptures. (She could be a marble sculpture, in the entrance of a museum, surrounded by scholars and artists and mesmerised passersby. Fucking beautiful in a way that only art ever is.) - - - Percy has had a crush on Annabeth since eighth grade. (He doesn’t know she likes him too.)

percy hitting the ground when annabeth kisses him 😭😭 HES SO REAL. i just recced this fic on instagram and i am here reccing it again bc it is EXCELLENT. i rly rly love to see pjotv percabeth in fic like i DO. theyre so fucking cute. and i LOVE how this author writes autistic annabeth!! it is so important to me!!! and this one is so CUTE like percy had such a huge crush on him.....like not just he liked her he had a CRUSH on her. god. i am melting.

thank you for joining me this friday!! happy reading!!

[biibini]

Hii!! After mizu graduates college, what type of job do you think she'd have? Would it have to do with sports or maybe something way different? (I absolutely love your writing and headcanons !! 🩷🩷)

modern!mizu post-college life headcanons

tags: post-grad life, engineering mizu, stable work life, a woman in stem, moving in with reader, basketball with mizu, mizu join fencing club, peaceful post-grad life (the dream)

a/n: ngl the thought of post-college life is tripping me out,,, im a junior in college rn and the thought of it just kinda doesnt?? exist?? also ive heard too much info from my friends' rants ab their engineering degrees and switching majors from mechanic to electrical back to mechanical engineering,, theyre fucking nuts

modern!mizu would prob be in the engineering sector of jobs

wooo stem baby (i am a digital marketing major i should not be talking)

bc hello?? money???

also let’s use that mechanical engineering degree to good use

she didn’t leave home for nothing

with her technical skills from eiji

modern!mizu would probably be a CAD engineer

CAD aka computer aided design

technically speaking, it would allow her to work from home or hybrid

and she can easily transfer her mechanical and on-hand knowledge to a digital format

like she’s smart yall

she just got some troubles w procrastination

but dont we all?

(coping so hard)

this job would also allow her free time and flexible hours to do her job

and i feel like modern!mizu opts for a good work-life balance

if she wishes, she can take the day off snd just go out with u or go to the gym

the freedom of choice while staying comfortable at home?

sign her tf up

she can have her tea time, gym time, spending time w u time, and her self care time

the self care in question: enjoying the silence

and realistically, its a well paying job thatll keep her and u afloat while helping eiji financially if need be

modern!mizu hopes her work and smarts can help her provide for others and herself

its ab time she doesnt let herself depend on a man for money

yeah thats a fuck u to u, m*k*o

shes made the mistake once

shes not gonna make it again

just bc postgrad modern!mizu isnt in sports doesnt mean she’ll stop playing

she needs to get her exercise and movement some way some form

basketball with taigen

and always aim for the three-pointers

and is successful most of the time

and then proceed to aim for the half court shots

and fail most times

fencing with eiji whenever shes back home

she’ll def try to teach u

and its fun at first but

she wants to stretch her wings out

modern!mizu would prob join a fencing club

it would be a great for her to fully practice and spar

not just against her old man

or go soft w u

but also go against ppl her age

modern!mizu would move into a place w u

nothing grand but a small apartment where u could refresh and build the place to be ur own

ringo is a good friend

a true best friend she could trust

but it was time to move in w u

and not be wary of ringo hearing u when he comes home

modern!mizu would be more adventurous in hobbies

yeah she has basketball and fencing and her tea collection

but now she has a stable job

no need to worry about grades

and just to live life one step at a time

she would probably try out pottery with u

definitely practice her cooking with ringo's and ur help

all in all, a very patient life

(she deserves it)

[arachnoia]

gone ➶ . ˚ ༉‧₊˚ˑ༄ؘ | miguel o’hara

miguel o'hara x fem! reader

a/n: i think that atp, im just a miguel o’hara writer (not that im complaining but gimmie requests pls !! theyre open on my acc !!) this is also a drabble ive been wanting to write because i’ve always wanted to write angst (well tbh idk what this is?) but wasn’t sure how to? lowkey i want this to be a story that isn’t just a one shot but lmk if you guys want more of this? im just trying stuff out!

pt2 - ‘holy shock’ pt 3- ‘finally’

─── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ───

“Breathe in, breathe out...”

The beautiful city stunned you as you stood on top of a random building, breathing in its modern, refreshing look.

It kind of took your breath away, contradictory to what you just told yourself a few seconds ago.

You barely finished another mission as your universe’s one and only Spider-Silk. Was it tiring? Hell yes, no doubt. But you never took a moment to actually admire Earth-928’s Nueva York, where Spider Society headquarters was located. Nueva York was also the place where you were if it wasn’t fighting crime and going to grad school in your own universe’s New York.

You usually swing to the top of a business building, a little bit far from Spider Society headquarters. It was quiet and peaceful. It was your thinking place where you could release any emotions you wanted to spill when you couldn’t anywhere else since you can’t really spill your emotions if you were to be taken seriously.

Plus, the one person who you expressed your deepest emotions, is gone.

As you simply stared into space while remembering the feeling you felt this morning.

You noticed some tears gathering at the outside corners of your eyes. Your eyelids began to droop, and you began to sob quietly as your chest hurt from, what some call “heartbreak”.

To be completely honest though, it was just melancholy and depression from what happened hours prior.

You couldn’t say that the emotion you felt for him or what you feel is loving him because it wasn’t love.

It felt like something stronger. But you knew it wasn’t reciprocated back.

─── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ───

“So why don’t you just kick your professor’s ass?” Miguel joked. His laugh made you feel warm inside. It was a cute laugh in your opinion.

The two of you were sitting down, at the building you like to think at, munching on sweet, baked, fig empanadas from a lady's restaurant in your universe. Doña Rosa? She was a nice lady and safe to say, Miguel would definitely come back for the empanadas.

“Please, O’Hara. I’d get simply kicked out and would have to never show my face ever again…But the bastard deserves it for ripping apart my paper on exploring different dimensions with colliders!”

He chuckled. “Right, because you have experience. Do you not? Y/l/n?”

“EXACTLY. BUT NOT EVEN GRAMMARLY HELPED ME NOT GO THROUGH HIS REIGN OF TERROR!” You felt pissed, but Miguel found it absolutely hilarious to see you worked up as you angrily took a bite out of your empanada. It was cute.

“Swear to god, that bitch is scarier than most of the stupid anomalies we fight,” You pouted and glanced at him. He looked like he was trying to not start laughing even harder than he was before. “Y/l/n. Just calm down it doesn’t matter. Plus didn’t you mention it was like 10% of your grade? You’ll be fine it’s not that bad.”

You smirked at him. “Oh, so you’re trying to say it’s still bad?”

“No…but look at me.” You turned to his direction as he placed his empanada on a napkin next to the rest of the lot and he rested his hands on your shoulders.

“Breathe in. Breathe out.” You chuckled at his direction.

“Miguel, you sound like a yoga instructor."

“No no, I’m being serious here! No dejas que esa mierda te moleste, okay?”

You raised your eyebrow and smiled playfully. “Alright, like you’re the calmest person on this Earth,” He laughed. “I’m not but you’re not like me. I don’t want that to affect you, especially because it doesn’t matter.”

“Now. Breathe in…”

You softly smiled at him, to which he returned, “And breathe out.”

─── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ───

“It's pleasant, isn't it?” Peter replied as he began to go in your direction, breaking up your train of thought. He and Mayday gave you a sad look as they walked over to hug your shaky form.

“How-?”

“Y/n, I saw you swinging here after barely teleporting here. What’s wrong?”

You didn’t know what to say. You felt a metaphoric weight on your shoulders as you struggled to tell Peter.

“Was it perhaps…Miguel?” You felt like laughing. Here you were, crying while Peter was acting full-on dad and Mayday was playing with her Spider-Man beanie. It would be a very unusual sight to someone who was just viewing you three at a distance.

“I’m just going to take that as a yes,” Peter said as he sat down on the roof and patted to the space next to him. “Take a seat, Y/l/n.”

You followed his directions and sat down.

It was quiet and a bit windy. It gave you a sad memory and you felt like you were drowning in it.

─── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ───

You felt a rush of anxiety and couldn’t breathe.

“I CAN’T. I CAN’T DO IT, O’HARA," you screeched, scratching Miguel's arm in excruciating pain.

“YES YOU CAN, Y/L/N!! CALM DOWN!”

The two of you were in a mission to stop an anomaly. You were one of the first to start attacking…and one of the first to be badly injured. Your right thigh was impaled with several medium sized pieces of glass from being thrown to a glass building and you ran out of webs to shoot. You froze and wanted to cry, feeling vulnerable.

Miguel went over to try to help you as the other Spiders went to attack said anomaly. You knew each other as friends since you were one of the first Spiders ever to be recruited to the Spider Society so you knew each other pretty well. When he saw you injured, he quickly saved some civilians and rushed to your direction.

“Yes, you can Y/l/n. Look at me. Breathe in.” Your eyes widened as you saw him grab the largest piece of glass. He had 2 pieces of cloth with him. “No, stop looking at them and look at me. Breathe in, goddamn it.”

You stared at him and he gave you a piece to bite down. You tried to calm down as he took the piece out and screamed into the cloth. “I’m going to wrap it up, okay?” He said, earning a nod from you. “Good girl. Now breathe in…”

“…Breathe out.” You said.

“That’s my girl,” He said as he smiled at you and carried you with the rest of the civilians.

─── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ───

“Breathe in, breathe out,” You whispered. Saying that phrase now just made your tongue feel bitter. Like eating a sour candy except it doesn’t turn out sweet at the end, but just making you frown.

Peter smiled and turned to you, “Now tell me what happened, kid. People don’t just run away before saying hi to their favorite person, therefore being me? !”

You scoffed, “Peter, no offense but why does it matter to you? You should be focusing on other things other than my well-being.”

Peter raised his eyebrow and rolled his eyes. “Listen, kid. You and the other Spiders like Gwen or Miles, matter to me.”

He covered Mayday’s ears. “Shit, even Miguel. If I see you mopey and sad and what not, of course, I’m going to be worried!”

“Really?” You were shocked. No one really has given you that fatherly attention like Peter has.

The only one who would really listen to you, was Miguel. But you can’t really rely on him now, can you?

“Yup. Now tell me what’s going on? Is everything okay?” Your breath hitched and you froze.

You then took a deep breath, sighed, and smiled bitterly.

“Miguel, he told me he wants me gone from his life,” you said as you felt a sudden pang in your chest.

Just feeling those words leave your lips made the melancholy come back even stronger.

And it hurt like fucking hell.

[memecatwings]

the thing about Vivarium (2019) is that it wasnt like the main couple particularly disliked kids. to the contrary, the both loved kids. gemma works as a grade school teacher and tom is a gardener who works for the school. tom is even sensitive enough that he buries two dead baby birds that fell from their nest at the start of the movie. these are two very caring and nuturing people who would have made excellent parents, they just didnt have kids *yet*. the tragedy of the story is that this couple that would have made excellent parents is given a child that they didnt plan for and didnt want. they werent ready to be parents yet and were forced into it without their consent. it is ultimately a story about people who are forced and pressured into living a life that they never would have chosen. theyre given everything they could ever need or want by cisheteronormative societal standards but they had no agency in it. they didnt chose it. its a story about how unwanted/unplanned children can drain the life out of people despite societys perception of them as "blessings". gemma and tom were very nurturing people yet when given a baby against their will it destroyed them; tom worked himself to death to escape and reject the child abandoning gemma to raise him alone, but raising him was just a job to her. gemma rejected motherhood til her dying breath. they abused the child, tom even tried to kill him, and gemma regrets not letting him do it when the child gets older. raising the child gave them nothing but suffering, they could only find peace sitting in their car (much like how for life in the suburbs your car is a lifeline - its nearly impossible to do anything without one). the movie was about the hidden suffering that lies just beneath the idyllic surface of suburbia; the voyeuristic, isolating, paranoid, depressive reality that afflicts families who never wanted life to be this way but were trapped into it. is it any wonder why this movie made people feel deeply uncomfortable?

[thedragonboi]

I am simultaneously in an ADHD-Autism alliance and an ADHD-Autism rivalry and I’ve never been more hyperaware of someone’s autism because I don’t want to just interpret their behaviours as “ew, annoying” and make them suffer further social isolation because of something out of their control. But at the same time, unlike my other autistic friends who understand I’m also neurodivergent just in a different way, he refuses to understand or be lenient with my neurodivergent behaviours.

No matter what I do or how I try to explain it to them, they keep ignoring/not understanding me. And I know autism makes social cues harder to understand but please this man is 23 and I’ve explained my boundaries and outlooks and ADHD behaviours non stop for MONTHS and I’m so close to killing him because he doesn’t understand and instead of taking that at face value and leaving me alone to avoid conflict he fucking keeps INSTIGATING.

I make a repetitive sound to keep myself focused and grounded? “Stop doing that”. Ok I’ll stop for a little while, maybe sensory issues. I’m loosing focus in class but conflict avoided. I go sit further away to do it again next class and try and focus. He moves to sit near me. “Stop that”. Huh???? You purposely sat next to the adhd student who ground’s themselves by making repetitive noises. I just move back to my original seat cause I can see better. If it’s genuinely that bad please wear your earbuds, I know you have them I’ve seen you wearing them.

Study session. I’m fiddling with the notebook while I wait for him to answer the exam question. “Stop that”. Ok, I’ll fiddle with the pen to focus instead. “Stop that”. Jesus fucking Christ what AM I allowed to do to keep myself grounded and focused??? Go study with someone else at this point.

Jesus fucking Christ this cretin refuses to give me peace.

He followed me on my walk home once.

No, not once a couple times. But I just remember the last time really vividly because he kept bringing up movies who’s subject matter I don’t like interacting with (I forget the movie titles but he said they’re about war and genocide and historical events where people were subjugated and abused by colonialism). I kept trying to change the subject to movies that I enjoyed but he kept FUCKING PUTTING ME DOWN CAUSE THEYRE NOT THE MATURE ADULT SAD EMOTION MEDIA.

FUCK YOU. I was walking home by myself, 2 minutes away from school. He sees me minding my business and comes up to me. Weird but ok, probably doesn’t understand the social boundary. Forgivable if uncomfortable. He brings up a subject matter I’m sensitive about. I try and change the conversation politely because, again, probably just doesn’t understand the social cues I’m trying to send. He REFUSES to let me change the subject matter and then you’re fucking SHOCKED when I get upset????

While that’s just one incident he does other things which just feel extremely mean spirited? Maybe they’re not but I genuinely don’t know how to get him to shut up about it.

Lately I’ve been doing this thing where I reward myself for small accomplishments by giving myself affirmations. It’s been great for my mental health so far. Just calling myself smart or cool whenever I get a question right in class or a good assignment/test score. I’ve been consistently getting good grades (I never used to before) so I’ve been saying/giving myself positive affirmations a lot more than usual. But he’s taken offence to it or something?????

Whenever I try and answer a question in class and I get it wrong he fucking pipes up and goes “not so smart are you?” so smugly. Genuinely actually shut the fuck up before I commit bodily harm against you. And so far I’ve been trying to rationalise his behaviour as not understanding social cues but this kind of behaviour is genuinely unacceptable. Like it’s one thing to not understand boundaries but it’s another to butt in the middle of class and call someone not smart.

But like…sometimes when people or even the fucking teacher pipes up and goes “hey maybe don’t do that” he responds with “sorry, autism, don’t really understand social cues” and like…no one in class is a psychiatrist so we can’t comment on it but I want so badly to just yell at him that there’s a point where your behaviour isn’t exclusively the autism and that you’re a 23 year old adult who is ultimately responsible for your own actions.

I think my experiences and friendships with other autistic people just makes it more obvious to me that his actions aren’t sourced from autism but don’t think I have it in me to just internalise and admit to myself that I’ve been dealing with my boundaries and feelings constantly being ignored while he insists we’re friends.

There’s a point where the amount of times he says we’re friends after crossing a boundary feels like gaslighting. Doing something a friend shouldn’t do, or at least apologise for if they do, and then immediately saying “it’s ok, because we’re friends” and I just sit there in silence to keep the peace. Gaslighting probably isn’t the right word but idk any other description for this behaviour

[prompts-weight-in-gold]

     text prompts stolen from my groupchats p. 4

[text] i just came here to fix my insecurities not to like improve myself as a person [text] you’re gonna get a good grade in being a special little white girl [text] *snaps my bones to make me sharper* that beast is goin down  [text] it could also be that I’m hallucinating but isn’t that just a symptom of womanhood anyway [text] i have no connection to reality and my untethered existence to anything but the void will either be a curse or a blessing and i dont know if i have any sway over which it decides to be [text] wig? on what cause? [text] im making a discord channel no one can post in just to pretend i can ever get some peace and quiet around here [text] im making all pokemon latino now. dúskul [text] noooooo baby dont restrict my use of internet shorthand ur so sexy aha [text] all men are clowns one way or another might as well find one who knows it [text] move over asimov's laws 'no significant crimes' is here to fuckin party [text] es siempre la hora de morbo [text] the face distracts while the hands attack [text] wow you would talk about history when you know colonialism took history away from me? [text] im not getting into heaven but i will be ready to court the devil with my sultry words [text] if you can’t find an emo in the wild, but have some patience, you can always just kill a smiley kid’s parents then wait [text] blonde bitpulls are still poc (pets of color) theyre just light skin [text] you’re handsome but also look like someone who forgets their wallet a lot [text] these devilish indulgences are the delights of the bourgeoisie while my proletarian citizens starve [text] at least ur keeping him off the streets [text] if i go too long without moisturizing i can physically feel my skin file a complaint. like before i even get dry i get the sensation of my cells pulling out lil pens to fill out a form [text] he has whiskers on his face i always thought naruto was a catboy [text] i couldn’t even give up cussing for ramadan so... [text] switching apps is the new walking through a doorway [text] god is real and he likes to make me suffer in new and mundane ways [text] on this day chaos has lost a finger of its chokehold grip on humanity’s pulse [text] a divorce is just a permanent block [text] if you say that to me again ill pull out your tattoo [text] if people have to see me they have to really see me [text] am I not coherent enough for you???? do you know who I am???? [text] the rules are mere crumbs and we are the cosmic brooms sweeping them under the rug of possibility [text] first point? amazing, flawless, wonderful. second point? stop appropriating gothness

[pinelews]

↟ Houštiny ↟

this is my first post about the story i’ve been working on for a while:] (and yet it feels like i have barely anything written down for it:/)

this man is the main protagonist. he ran away from the city because he couldn’t face his own problems and ended up in an old house/cabin/hut/whatever in the middle of nowhere. he thought the calm nature surroundings would offer him a peace of mind, but after a while he realised it all just gave him more room and time to think. yaady yaada one day he gets

struck by a literal star💥

(psst the star was doing the same thing as the man, running away) and yeaaa theyre stuck in a situationnnn like the star is within him n they talk n stuff idk im like,, super stuck on what to do with the premise cause it’s partially based on a story i wrote in like 9th grade

ya know what, im gonna post all my silly doodles and notes here to sorta idk, to have it somewhere secluded from my usual stuff since i dont use tumblr much anyway

[transmutationisms]

another obvious highschool student here, any tips on how to deal with a classmate using chatgpt and getting rewarded with honors? in terms of accepting and making my peace with it, i mean. i see the light now haha and i agree with you but it hurts to see, especially since over here, ranking positions determine the scholarship/financial aid that you can get. i know that being "less good" at essay writing doesnt mean that theyre less worthy of receiving education, i do get that. it just sucks being in a system that rewards so arbitrarily, and despite trying to adhere to the shitty rules, still being beat out by an ai in the end. should i try to speak about this with an adult? should i just use chatgpt now too? the worst part is i do enjoy essay writing (though i know im not very good at it)

like, i'm sympathetic to your plight here, but you and your classmate are both operating within the same shitty system. this person is not your enemy, they're just someone else trying to get the same rewards you want. i'm sure you already kind of know this, but the parameters here (grades determining financial aid, financial aid determining access to higher ed, higher ed determining future earning potential, &c) are all so fucked that i can only feel bad for all of the students in your position, regardless of what tools they're using to try to deal with it. i would not ever tattle on someone for this type of behaviour—again, i understand your concern about your own position, but using the levers of academic power to fuck someone else over is just not a decision i could ever defend lol.

anyway, frankly, chatgpt produces shitty papers. it's not a brain, it's just picking words and phrases based on whatever is statistically probable in the corpus it was trained on—so it's not really capable of doing any actual analysis. it's at best just listing facts, at worst generating those facts and then listing them. if your classmate is genuinely getting good marks on these papers... i'm sorry to say but your teachers are either not reading them, or are using such an incredibly fucked rubric that you should frankly give up on the idea that this marking is helping you to improve your own ability to communicate an argument in writing. i don't think it would be immoral or anything for you to just use chatgpt yourself, tho of course i would recommend utmost caution about the risk of being caught and punished. like you, i do enjoy essay-writing, and i hope that you continue to do it if it's something you continue to enjoy—but you can learn and practice this skill outside of an academic context, and again, if your grading system is rewarding chatgpt essays then i honestly don't think it's capable of teaching you good essay-writing anyway.

[crinkled-emotions]

Hey G, I have a prompt idea from the list, but I'm not sure if it's something you'd be interested in writing so I said I'd ask first. No hassle if you're not! 😊

I was thinking Uncle Slider looking out for Bradley, when he gets sick, I'm thinking they could be deployed on the same carrier or something idk, and it's one of the firsrt times together when theyre back on good terms after Bradley cutting off Mav (I know you said no mav at the moment, so we can just leave him in the desert on leave haha. Sorry Mav, enjoy the sand)

7 and 22 from whumpril and the first one from the emeto prompts please

Gotcha!! Thanks for your patience, I finally got around to this after that unexpected hiatus 🥰😂

I have changed it up just a little. It'll make sense when you read it lmao.

7. "Numbness/Unsteady/ [You look pale]", 22. "Sponge Bath/Infection/ [Let's get you cleaned up]" and 1. "Straining/losing their voice from retching"

-

"Captain Kerner!"

Slider paused mid-step in the hallway, turning to glance over his shoulder.

"Lieutenant Junior Grade Seresin, what can I do for you?"

"It's Bradshaw, sir. I just went back to our quarters to change but he's sick."

"Okay...? Take him to the infirmary if he's that bad."

"He's asking for you, sir."

Slider paused, eyebrow raising.

"Let's go."

Seresin led him through the carrier, practically parting the crowds with his confidence... and his broad shoulders. By the time they got to the room, Seresin was handing over his keys.

"I'm going to bunk with one of my friends for the night, sir. Bradshaw sounds like he could use the room to himself."

Slider frowned, but didn't push it further as the kid disappeared back into the crowd. He gently knocked on the door before pushing it open, surprised at what he saw.

"Bradley."

"Uncle Sli, hey," he croaked hoarsely from his bunk, the room's trash can in his arms. Slider knelt by him, gently putting a hand to his forehead.

"That's one hell of a fever. Alright, up, let's get you into the infirmary-"

"-no!"

Bradley put the trash can on the floor and Slider sighed when the kid scooted forward into his arms. Slider kept his hand on the back of his neck, tucking him into his shoulder like he used to when Bradley was a baby.

-

He'd been visiting Carole once when Bradley had gone down with a fever in the middle of the night and Carole, exhausted after staying up with the four year old all night, had gone to bed. Slider had offered to watch him during the day and Bradley had promptly crawled on to his lap, wrapped an arm around Slider's neck and kept his thumb in his mouth all day. He'd slept for a majority of the day so when Carole came downstairs after her own nap the five year old was back to his usual cheeky self. It was a bittersweet memory, to Slider, knowing Goose would have hated watching his kid sick but loved the moment to hold him a little longer. And Carole, she was gone too. She was gone and despite being on the same carrier working closely for almost four months, Bradley had barely said two words to him until now.

-

With Bradley now back in bed, tucked under a warmer blanket with seasickness medication in his system, Slider made the decision if he couldn't take him to the infirmary he was going to bring the infirmary to him.

"I'll be back as soon as I can."

He didn't move, or make a noise, but it was more for Slider's own peace of mind. He tried to remember what Carole or even Mav would do when Bradley wasn't well, what they mentioned in passing. All he could remember was having to pick up the fifteen year old at his mother's funeral and he wasn't sure he could cope with remembering that.

Carole was too good for this world.

-

"Captain Kerner, is everything okay?"

"I need something to stop vomiting and reduce a fever."

One of the doctors on the carrier paused, blinking at Slider.

"Let's get a look at you-"

"-it's not me, it's Lieutenant Junior Grade Bradshaw. He's sleeping it off for now."

"How high is the fever? Give me a moment, let me grab his file and check allergies."

"He doesn't have allergies. He was warm to the touch but not to the point I was going to drag him down here."

The doctor turned from where he'd been looking for Bradley's file, hands on his hips.

"You've felt his fever? Kid has a track record among other docs I've talked to, won't let anyone touch him."

"I knew him when he was little. Long story. What would you recommend?"

"Well, the problem is if he's vomiting, it's hard to get it to stop long enough for the medication to settle. We could try the motion sickness pill, or maybe the liquid form-"

"-I already gave him the pill, but we both know it's going to come back up."

The doctor hummed, pulling the file and dropping it on the desk. He quickly skimmed it, then reached for his prescription pad.

"Do you think you could give him a jab in the ass? Maybe some IV fluids?"

"Nope."

"Perfect, bring him down here and I'll do it."

-

"Rooster- oh, shit."

Slider stepped into the room and grabbed the bucket when he realised how badly the kid was straining himself, brushing a hand through his hair.

"Just breathe, yeah? Slow down."

Bradley groaned, drawing his knees to his chest and trying to stifle his coughing.

"Good?" Slider asked. Bradley shook his head, going to speak but finding he couldn't. Slider sighed.

"Now we're really going to the infirmary. You're lucky you haven't torn something."

Slider watched the kid go to complain or maybe even flat out refuse, but then he put a hand out and Slider helped him to stand, wrapping an arm around his waist. Bradley buried his face into Slider's shoulder, Slider feeling the grimace that crossed his features.

"Goddamn kid, stop growing would ya? I think normal people stop at fifteen, not twenty-five," he grumbled. With a careful hand on Bradley's back, he started back toward the infirmary. He got to the door and it abruptly opened, Slider tightening his hold on Bradley only to find-

"Seresin, what do you need?"

"I just wanted to see if Rooster was okay, sir."

Slider glanced between the two men, Bradley hanging off him, and his eyebrows shot up. He'd seen this song and dance before, many years ago, with a certain two aviators...

He couldn't wait to tell Ice about this later. If Goose had been here-

"He's going to the infirmary, Seresin. How about you give me a hand?"

"Sure."

Seresin came around Bradley's other side, hoisting him up. With his help Bradley and Slider made their way to the infirmary.

-

The doctor Slider had spoken to earlier was already waiting, an exam bed open and waiting. He glanced over his shoulder at Seresin, an eyebrow raised.

"How bad is it?"

"He's not cryin' for his daddy yet," Seresin said, and then promptly shut his mouth. Slider went to tell him off but Bradley groaned, writhing on the bed. Both Seresin and Slider whipped around from their hushed discussion, the doctor ready to put the IV into his arm.

"Which of you wants to hold him down?"

"I got it," Seresin sighed, while Slider sat on the end of the bed and kept his hand on Bradley's knee.

"Hey, kid, you need to look at me. Just keep lookin' at me, don't look at Seresin."

"He stinks," Bradley whispered, an inside look shared between him and Slider. Seresin huffed, rolling his eyes.

"I-"

"-I'm in and we're looking good. Let's give that some time to work through his system, and then hopefully he'll be good to be discharged later today."

The doctor picked up his clipboard and made a swift exit. Rooster tried to roll on to his side but Seresin stopped him, glancing over at Slider.

"Is it safe?" He asked. Slider shrugged.

"I look like a doctor to you?"

"Sli," Bradley croaked. Slider knew that croak and yanked the bucket out from under the sink, helping Bradley sit up. Seresin kept his hand on Bradley's back, making lazy circles more to soothe than encourage.

"You're okay Roos, just breathe. I'm here, Seresin's here. You're alright."

Considering he hadn't managed to keep anything down for what Slider could only guess had been about twelve hours, the retching tugged at his throat and vocal cords. Seresin grimaced, turning away and Slider gently guided the bucket away from Bradley.

"It's okay kid, your stomach is fucking you around. Take a breath."

He couldn't remember where he'd learned to say these things, nor when he'd ever felt so protective over Bradley Bradshaw, but he could see he was scared, and that scared him. Even when he was at his mother's funeral, saying her eulogy with Mav by his side, Bradley never looked scared.

"He's got this... thing," Seresin finally explained, "it's been like this as long as I knew him. I dunno why, it just unsettles him. He's usually a smartass, doesn't know when to shut his trap, but if I get sick near him, or he gets the flu... god, it's like the end of the world. I got two younger sisters and I've never seen anything like it."

Slider frowned, focusing on brushing his fingers through Bradley's curls. With help he lay back down, curling on to his side despite Seresin's concerns it wasn't safe.

"How long have you two known each other?" Slider asked, feeling Bradley rest his head against Slider's side from where he was standing beside the bed.

"Nearly five years. He's a stubborn bastard, but I suppose you already knew that."

"His parents were both like that, and then his godfather, well- he's in some unknown location in Buttfuck, Nowhere because of his stubbornness."

Seresin smiled, reaching down to squeeze Bradley's side before gesturing to the door.

"I'm gonna go clean the room and get some sleep. Give you two some time to talk."

"Thanks, Seresin. Oh, and kid- between you and me, I don't particularly care about DADT. You do what makes you happy, any one who has a problem with that can answer to me."

Seresin's tan hid the blush on his cheeks, but his neck turned a gentle hue of pink and he cleared his throat.

"Thank you, sir. I appreciate that."

Right as he slipped out Bradley glanced up at Slider, tugging on his hand.

"M'sorry," he whispered, "I didn't mean to drag you into this. I'll be okay, if you wanted to go back to work, I know you're busy-"

"-don't be ridiculous. You needed me, and here I am. I was there when you were four, and I'm here now."

"I'm sorry that I cut you out."

"I know."

Slider pulled a chair over, taking Bradley's hand and giving it a squeeze. Bradley sniffled, scooting over to bury against Slider.

"You cold?"

"No."

"Alright, kid. Try and get some sleep, I'm not going anywhere."

The nurse dropped off a bowl of lukewarm water and a cloth, and Slider took the opportunity to place the damp cloth on Bradley's forehead.

"Better?"

"Hmmm..."

-

[sexydreamgirl]

i feel sad because i don’t really believe in the law anymore and cant even be bothered to test it out since i think it’ll be for nothing, like, i know i can get what i want and ive gotten to manifest stuff in the past but those same things couldve easily been a bunch of coincidences specially since theyre not rlly important and wouldve happened anyway even without me trying (as in, good grades for example)

part of me feels like im missing out by not giving it a chance, theres so many things id love to do and have but i really cant bring myself to believe in manifestation anymore after almost four years of nothing, itll probably give me peace of mind to just accept this isnt a thing and give up but idfk, what if it is?? i dont have motivation to learn, i cant believe anything neville or any of these blogs are saying and it sucks because i really want this to be true

sorry this probs doesnt make much sense im sleep deprived rn, where should i go from here,,,,??

I think the last thing you want to hear right now is to give it another chance and keep going, but I'm afraid that's precisely what I would advise. I wouldn't be here investing my time into two blogs with posts and your questions answered if I hadn't tested the law out for myself and proven it to be true. That would be a waste of my time and yours. If you choose to no longer believe in the law and you're done with it, that's completely fine. Go right ahead. But if this is really something important to you, you won't accept what you don't want.

[schnitzelsemmerl]

to follow up w my previous post: my dad just came to me having a very awkward convo about how it isnt his fault and that i shouldnt do things other ppl tell me to keep the peace and overall just kinda defending himself when i didnt say anything against him and telling me that *I* "couldve phrased it better", not even my mom!! me!

edit: theyre now all acting like nothing happened and are like "oh when are you gonna fix your grades?" BRO JUST GIMME A MINUTE PLEASE