#Also pulling a tooth can be pretty traumatic

[witch-of-the-west-country]

If the preborn are people, then abortion is murder.

If they aren't people, then abortion is not worse then pulling a tooth.

Women who have had abortions know the latter is false. Maybe you should talk to some of the ones who have has a few decades to get out of denial and confront their trauma.

Abortion kills innocent people and you can't prove that the preborn are the only class of living human organisms that aren't people.

You're Pro-Violence and you know it.

Actually I have had 2 live births, 1 miscarriage, and 1 abortion. I also have 2 adopted children. So try again fucker. I know what I'm talking about whichever way you come at me.

Having an abortion isn't a fucking walk in the park but neither is carrying a child for nine months, giving birth, post natal depression, coping with the catastrophic changes it does to your body, and bringing up a child well and compassionately to be a decent member of society.

Fuck off with your blinkered opinion. Every child deserves to be wanted. We know what can happen to unwanted children and it's far worse than an abortion.

Pro choice all the way 🖕

[ixiot-ghostrebel]

What if the reader was the child of the creator and had these gorgeous horns until one day, they were being looked after by Raiden, Venti, Nahida, Zhongli and they hear this mixed sounds of rocks breaking and bone snapping suddenly appearing and reader's large and gorgeous horns is suddenly not attached and in their hands while blood drips from their head. Apparently their horns were feeling pretty wobbly and they wanted to pull them to get rid of the feeling because it felt annoying.

PS: this is normal for this to happen, it's like pulling a tooth and a new one grows back.

How would they react to the graces child's horns no longer attached to their head.

OOOHH BOY, ARCHONS BUCKLE YOUR SEATBELTS, YOUR BABYSITTING CAREERS ARE ABOUT TO BE SHOOT THROUGH A BIG ROLLERCOASTER!

Honestly cannot blame them for panicking though—I would honestly do the same if I were in that position—

(Disclaimers: Might be OOC!)

Raiden Ei

The moment she sees the Almighty Creator's child's head bleeding, she is already scolding herself greatly for not being able to protect a child.

And then she sees the horns. That's when her panic begins to really spike up. That is—until she remembers Mikoshi Chiyo—her dear oni friend of bygone times—mention something about how some animals shed their horns during certain times of the year. And how her children have their teeth fall out when they were younger but we don't talk about that-

"Your Younger Grace, let us clean this all up before it becomes more of a mess." She tries to soften her voice towards you, knowing that she is dealing with a) a child and b) the literal descendant of the Almighty Creator. She does not dare to try and be cruel to the child who's parent can literally strike her down faster than lightning and time itself.

She's not exactly the most open nowadays, but she would still try to make herself as approachable as possible, if you two weren't close before.

If you two were? Well, that makes it a lot easier—her concern is easily detected and she's already cleaning up the blood and taking your previous horns somewhere else (probably a place where nobody would begin to panic just at the sight of it).

She won't even speak a single word about this incident after it's over. Ei does not want to look back at this memory and remember just how much of a heart attack she just gained by staring at the Divine One's child.

Venti

This man, hands down, will panic for a good few hours. Probably won't think straight as he thinks he's failed the Almighty Creator.

"Your Younger Grace, quick—let's get that cleaned up now!" Man would probably also yeet your horns away (gently) so that he never has to see it again. Venti is 100% traumatized again.

Would keep an eye on you whenever you touch your head now—this guy is making sure you never repeat the same thing again.

It won't be 'till a LONGG time before he realizes it's like a deer with your horns—but still, it's still pretty traumatic for our wisp boi, let's be hoenst—

Nahida

She would naturally be very upset that you would hurt yourself. However, she's not as panicked—she compares this situation like a deer. Or, actually—she hypothesizes.

Nevertheless, Nahida is still pretty upset you have to bleed because of this. She never wants to see you hurt, ever!

"Your Younger Grace, please let one of my people tend to your head..." She would call in her best medics from her nation to make sure your bleeding stops, before she deals with the horns that you practically tore off.

She will admit, it was very strange to hold the pieces of the Almighty Creator's child's horns as if they were collectible items. So, for the time being, she'll just keep them in a wrapped cloth to hide them.

Every time you do this, Nahida is now extra prepared for your "horn regrowth," as she calls it.

Zhongli

Dude is honestly the least surprised out of them all. I mean—can you blame him? He legit has seen it happen—remember what animal Moon Carver is? Yeah, that's right: a deer. Man's seen the guy shed antlers all the time, honestly.

But what he didn't expect is that you would actually bleed from pulling your horns off. That's what gets this grandpa of an Archon moving.

"Your Grace, allow me to tend to your injuries." Would treat it so seriously you think you were actually injured—you're just sitting there trying to recall how you might have hurt yourself until you realize Zhongli was talking about the horns you pulled off.

Pretty calm about the horns, honestly. Like I said, he's probably seen it one too many times. He'll probably ask the Almighty Creator themself of what he should do with them.

Would also probably educate the other archons so that they could stop having an absolute panic attack each time you decide to make your head bleed (cough looking at you, Venti cough).

And that's it! Everyone's except Ei's is short, but I do hope you like it! See you all around :)

Ghost Rebel Side Note: Yes, I did do some research with Ei's part—mainly because I don't really know how exactly she would react to a situation like this. I'm taking in terms with the fact that she is also mentally arguing/dealing with the Puppet Shogun, so there is some sort of rationalism behind her actions because of this. And, no, I don't believe Oni are able to shed off their horns, so I just made one of Ei's friends mention something about re-growing horns/teeth lol-

Check the Ghost Rebel's Blog Description to See if Their Mailbox is Open!

[the-sunflower-room]

✧spending christmas with akutagawa✧

akutagawa x fem!reader headcanons

☆note: this got way out of hand lol, i just couldn’t stop thinking of cute christmas scenarios with him. happy holidays!

☆warnings: slightly suggestive, playful teasing, angst if you squint (aku needs a hug). otherwise just tooth rotting holiday fluff!

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-akutagawa was new to the whole christmas thing.

-he knew of the holiday, sure, but with his traumatic past and busy adult life, he just never had any reason to celebrate

-the port mafia wasn’t exactly a festive work place

-plus, who would he even buy gifts for?

-maybe gin, but since the siblings had never celebrated before, he just didn’t see the point

-that is until y/n came along

-her passion for the holiday was a little baffling to him when december rolled around

-he just stands and watches in bewilderment as she runs around and covers their entire apartment with decorations

-“why exactly do we need all of this?” he questions her in the kitchen with one eyebrow raised, unsure of why their dishes, mugs, and hand towels need to be christmas themed

-“because it’s cute and gets me in the holiday spirit! these plates are my favorite,” she beams with that smile of hers that makes his heart stop

-he can’t argue with that

-she absolutely makes him help put up the tree

-as much as he groans and complains and says he doesn’t want to do it, he honestly just loves spending time with her and doing anything that makes her happy

-he even uses rashomon to hang ornaments on the tallest parts of the tree

-who needs a ladder anyway?

-a small, lovesick smile breaks through his cold exterior as he watches her eyes light up when the tree is finally finished

-“it looks perfect! thank you so much for helping, ryu,” she gushes happily, looking so damn adorable akutagawa might just die

-y/n also makes it her mission to hang mistletoe all over the apartment

-that way akutagawa can’t escape the inevitable kisses

-“come on, it’s literally the rules of mistletoe, you have to kiss me,” she giggles one evening when he finds himself trapped beneath the sprig of red and green

-“i don’t understand why a stupid plant should dictate my affections for you,” he deadpans, crossing his arms and ignoring the blush creeping up his neck

-she just rolls her eyes, taking another step closer to him with a mischievous grin

-“so you’re saying you wouldn’t kiss me if that ‘stupid plant’ wasn’t there? not even a little? not even when i dressed up all pretty for you?”

-her bold, teasing tone has his entire face heating up as his eyes roam over the gorgeous red dress that hugs her body in all the right places

-she had put it on for her holiday work party that she was dragging him to later that night, despite his protests

-he turns and coughs into his hand, averting his gaze from her with a frustrated scowl

-she always knows how to push his buttons (in the best possible way) and it drives him crazy

-“awww, is my shy little ryu blushing? are you nervous to give your girlfriend a kiss? poor baby-”

-he effectively silences her playful taunts by surging forward and capturing her lips with his own, cold hands gripping her face and soft lips moving across hers with so much hunger and desperation it leaves her breathless

-y/n starts to pull away after a moment but he refuses to let her go, grunting in protest and tangling one of his hands in her hair

-she even feels rashomon snake around her waist to tug her closer to his chest

-eventually y/n manages to break away to gasp for breath, eyes wide and filled with pleasant surprise

-her stomach flips when she sees some of her red lipstick smeared on the corner of his mouth

-he doesn’t even try to wipe it off

-he’s just staring at her with a smug grin, so cocky and proud of himself for stunning her into silence

-“what were you saying again?”

-“ryunosuke-”

-ok yeah maybe he can live with the mistletoe

-when it comes to buying a gift for y/n, akutagawa is a total mess

-literally considers asking gin for help because as much as he tries, he struggles to figure out what she would like or what would count as a good gift

-he’s so nervous he’ll buy the wrong thing and send the wrong message

-“what if she hates it? what if it’s not what she wants at all? will she think i don’t care?”

-he feels downright pathetic as he watches her open the carefully wrapped box on christmas morning, palms sweating and mind racing with anxiety

-he just wants to prove to her that he can be thoughtful and sweet

-he feels like he’s bad at showing that he cares, so he really wants to get this present thing right

-needless to say, whatever he gets her ends up being perfect and y/n won’t stop raving about it

-“how did you know i wanted this? i talked about it months ago, i can’t believe you remembered! i love it, thank you so much!”

-for some reason akutagawa is surprised when she gives him a gift in return

-why would he of all people deserve a gift?

-the thought of her buying something just for him makes him emotional for some reason

-she’s put so much love and care into wrapping it and he thinks he might suffocate as she excitedly watches him open it

-he’s immediately SO touched by the gift once he sees what it is

-it’s something he didn’t even realize she picked up on him wanting

-the fact that she pays so much attention to the things he says and likes has him fighting back tears

-y/n is so worried thinking she did something wrong

-akutagawa rarely cries, especially in front of her, so she can’t help but think he hates the gift

-“no no no, what’s the matter? why are you crying? i’m so sorry, is it not what you wanted? i can go get you something else! it’s not a big deal at all, i kept the receipt-”

-he immediately eases her worries by pulling her into a bone crushing hug

-he really doesn’t know what’s come over him

-or why a simple gift is making him feel so overwhelmed

-maybe it’s because he never really felt worthy of love until meeting y/n

-having a significant other who cares so much about him and his interests—enough to buy him a perfect gift without even asking what he wants—makes him feel like maybe he is capable of being loved

-and that thought alone makes him teary eyed

-“shut up. i love it,” he grumbles into her shoulder, sniffling quietly and trying desperately to mask the crack in his voice

-she’s just relieved he actually likes it

-truthfully, he would’ve loved anything she got him because he loves her more than he cares to admit and appreciates every little thing she does for him

-like he’s seriously head over heels for this woman

-anyways

-they spend the rest of christmas day cuddled up on the couch watching movies, content in each other’s embrace

-eventually akutagawa feels her head slump against his shoulder

-his heart swells with fondness as he realizes that she’s falling asleep on him

-“tired?” he asks gently, glancing down at her sleepy expression

-she just hums in response, cozying up against his arm with a soft smile

-here in this moment, in the glow of the christmas tree lights with y/n falling asleep on him, akutagawa feels completely at peace

-the holidays had turned out to be much more pleasant than he had expected, but most of that had to do with y/n and the joy she so easily brought into his life

-he’s sure he’ll cherish these warm memories forever

-“merry christmas, ryu,” she mumbles, her angelic voice full of love for him even as she drifts off to sleep

-leaning down and planting a soft kiss to her forehead, akutagawa doesn’t bother hiding his smile as she finally succumbs to slumber

-“merry christmas, y/n”

bonus: y/n bringing akutagawa home to meet her family for the holidays

-he’s a nervous wreck the entire way there

-what will they all think of me? what will her parents think?

-he can’t help but feel like they won’t like him

-he’s so different from y/n in so many ways

-he sees her as the epitome of kindness and innocence while he’s the devil of the port mafia, a criminal whose hands are stained with blood

-god only knows he doesn’t deserve someone like her, and it’ll crush him if her parents don’t approve of his relationship with their daughter

-he just wants to make a good impression

-when the two of them arrive at y/n’s parents’ house, he’s on his absolute best behavior

-regal, polite, and charming as he can possibly be

-maybe her parents are a little surprised by his appearance at first (he’s dressed in all black and suffers from resting bitch face, so can you really blame them?)

-but when they see how gracious he is and how he treats their daughter like she’s the most important woman in the world, all of their apprehension disappears

-they’re just happy to see her happy, and are eager to include akutagawa in all the festivities

-the evening passes by in a blur of food, gifts, games and laughter

-akutagawa finds himself surprisingly relaxed by the end of the night, anxiety long forgotten

-something about sitting in y/n’s childhood home, listening to her laugh with her loved ones and occasionally indulging in the fun himself, fills him with a strange but comforting feeling he doesn’t even have the words to describe

-her family immediately accepting him with open arms and allowing him to share in their holiday traditions leaves cracks in his cold, guarded heart

-he’s spent his entire life convincing himself that he’s undeserving of such innocent pleasures, like having a loving girlfriend and a family to share the holidays with

-he realizes that he finally has everything his younger self could have ever wanted, and he’s determined to never take it for granted

-meeting y/n’s family for christmas only solidifies how much akutagawa loves her and wants to spend the rest of his life with her ♡

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[sinsmockingbird]

Five threesome pairs I want to be apart of. They'll be listed from the pair I want to be in between the most of, to the I still want to be in between them but not aching for it. For @sea-lanterns.

✧ GENSHIN IMPACT

1.) Raiden Ei & Yae Miko. I love these two, I love the ship (for the most part) and love their dynamic. I just know being in bed with them both is fucking crazy, and I want to experience that. Miko teasing the hell outta me and Ei, while the Archon is just getting a sweet tooth off me.

2.) Beidou & Ningguang. How can I not want to be with these two!? Lesbians, I love them, I want to witness their banter in bed while they pleasure me. You know Beidou is more rough and sloppy while Ningguang is slow and precise (great with her tongue).

3.) Arlecchino & Furina. Yes, a more toxic pairing with pretty dead dove themes, as deemed by the fandom. I don't fully ship them, but I just want to ruin Furina with Arlecchino. I want us both to make her cry and beg from our teasing, we'd be good cop bad cop.

4.) Ningguang & Ganyu. I'm sorry, but Ningguang has made it up here twice, because fucks sake I want her. I want these two to be slow and gentle with me, particularly after a hard day. We can take a warm bath and then after have loving sex.

5.) Shenhe & Yelan. Being tied up by Yelan and just having Shenhe all over me is.... yeah. I'm not too into Yelan, but goddammit, I am very into Shenhe.

✧ HONKAI STAR RAIL

1.) Black Swan & Acheron. The only reason this is number one is from that YouTube video. The two at, 2, were originally here, but it's changed. I want to be fucked hard by Acheron and become traumatized with Black Swan. I'll be the one to bring these two back together.

2.) Kafka & Himeko. I don't think much has to be said as to why, I mean... the chemistry between these two and the obvious history. Plus I want Kafka to ruin my pussy while Himeko is there comforting me, and allowing me to suck on her boobs. Best therapy fuck, right here.

3.) Stelle & Firefly. Let me please dominate and tease these two!! Oh my god I want to make Stelle squirm while I jerk their cock off and make sure she gets to the point of release before stopping. Then making Firefly a flushed mess while she watches, touching herself until I go between her legs-!!! God I want them.

4.) Jingliu & Yukong. My tragic old yuri women. Deranged Jingliu fucking me hard and in heat Yukong- yes I want to be bred and knocked up. I don't want to leave that bed until I'm filled with their cum, okay!! Plus, they both just need love.

5.) Serval & Natasha. This is a rare pair between two old women I love so much. We need Natasha to heal Serval's broken heart, the one Cocolia left her with, she is a doctor after all. And if getting into bed with them will start that? Then 100% we're doing that.

✧ PATH TO NOWHERE

1.) Zoya & Angell. After that fanart I saw with them both, and that thirst I wrote as well, I've never wanted to be between two women more. I want them to try and stake claim on me, fighting over me even as they fuck me dumb. I don't care how many bites and scratches I have on my body after.

2.) Shalom & Rahu. I want Rahu fucking me raw, like a dog in heat, while Shalom watches and praises us both. I also want to participate in endlessly teasing Rahu and making her unable to cum until Shalom gives her permission. It's a coin flip with them both for me.

3.) Deren & Raven. Give me these two creative ladies and let me pull them into bed with me. Just knowing Raven would be very high energy with a low energy Deren is amusing, but it works. Raven is doing most of the work, not that she minds, while I lazily jerk Deren off. It's fucking heaven.

4.) Cabernet & Kelvin. Intimidated but aroused Kelvin, having her thighs pinned down on the bed with Cabernet eating her out. Then I'm on the side, teasing her nipples and marking her neck, praising her. I want it.

5.) Tetra & Pricilla. These two would be beyond teasing in bed, and you know what, I'd take it all. I want to their prized gem that they worship and love.

[gh0st-t0wn3]

Some Lmk ss edits + Headcanons (Traffic light trio)

- He/They

- Gay

- Only wears knock off brands (doesn't know they aren't real)

- Autumn is his favorite season, purely because he likes to stomp the crunchy leaves

- Adhd

- Has dimples

- Pigsy once got him rainbow shoes for pride month before he was even out but MK didn't realize they were pride shoes because the rainbow was on the sole

- Tried to cook breakfast for Pigsy and Tang on Father's day once, somehow lit the curtains on fire

- Wants Tattoos but keeps backing down because he doesn't like needles (will probably get one in the future though)

- Has a sketchbook fully dedicated to Redson, would literally die if someone ever found it

- Smells like oranges

- Only a few inches taller than Redson, always teases him for it

- Almost killed Sun Wukong once because he was disguised as a spider

- The Monkey's on flower fruit mountain always climb on him when he's around, he doesn't try to stop them

- Had to remove the snooze option on his alarm clock because he wouldn't stop hitting it

- Chicken scratch handwriting, no one else can read it for the life of them

- Learned Spanish in high school, don't ask why it just feels right

- Covered in scars, but 83% of them are from being a dumb kid instead of battles

- Once described Redson's voice as "really warm, like a hug!" And almost got burnt for it

- Love language is physical touch

- Has those really pretty brown eyes, like the ones that look like honey when the light hits them at that one perfect angle

- Has no fashion sense whatsoever, Mei chose out most of the clothes he owns

- Phone is shattered beyond repair but he refuses to acknowledge that he needs to get a new one

- Obsessively takes personality/buzzfeed tests in the dead of night, once pulled an all nighter just taking "which drink are you?", "what kind of seafood are you?" "What type of candy are you?" Type of buzz feed quizzes, and physically couldn't do deliveries because he was so exhausted the next morning

- Has a bunch of plants but is terrible at taking care of them

- Has a chipped tooth (actually Canon, it's on his lego figurine, I'm still sad they didn't add it to the show :( )

- Once walked in on Tang and Pigsy kissing as a kid and was promptly traumatized

- Has no skin or hair care routine, uses a 3 in 1 Shampoo/conditioner/bodywash

- Has really nice curly/wavy hair but straightens it and uses an unholy amount of hair gel

- Has a wattpad account

- Sleeps in literally the most horrific positions you have ever seen, yet somehow never get cramps or neck/back pains

- Once drank dishwasher soap as a kid because he thought it was juice

- Gets sunburnt incredibly easy (if you've seen the s4 special ykwim)

- Mk once accidently threw a plastic bottle in the trash instead of the recycling bin and got lectured for an hour by Pigsy (Pigsy is a huge environmentalist)

- His bedroom is messy as all hell but he somehow knows where everything is (Pigsy and Tang have tried cleaning it themselves but it was back to being a mess just a few short hours later so they gave up)

- He/Him (FtM)

- Gay

- Shortest one in the trio (just barely though). I like to think that the removal of the samadhi fire stunted his growth and demonic development, which is also why he takes so little after his father in appearance/height. He always wears platforms though, so he looks taller than he is

- He was so quiet and sneaky as a child that his mom had to put a bell on him

- Used to wear large combat boots until someone made a "step on me" joke. He doesn't wear them in public anymore

- Smells like smoke and cinnamon, Mei once described it as a 'campfire' smell

- Has really heavy blackout curtains in his bedroom

- Hair turns black when wet or when he's burnt out

- Always has a soft glow to his body because of his fire, mouth glows faintly, hair glows faintly, the more emotional he is the stronger the glow (MK and Mei are incredibly jealous)

- Tension headaches because we all know that mf has his hair tied up in the tightest goddamn ponytail ever

- Has the samadhi fire back (I'm delusional just let me have this)

- Has a habit of stealing his friends and families clothes to wear, first started when he was really little and would constantly steal whatever clothes of DBK's he could find around the house to help him feel like his dad was still there, and the habit just stuck with him

- Doctor handwriting

- Autistic

- Identifies as male but still likes to wear skirts and dresses sometimes (he just like me fr). Likes floor length skirts the best

- Actually really good at art, mostly draws blueprints for his inventions, but can draw people and landscapes pretty decently too

- Has a childhood Bull plushie that he still sleeps with, hides it under the bed or in the closet whenever MK and Mei come over

- has a scar on his back resembling the rings of samadhi from the removal ritual, Mei once confused it for a tattoo

- Mei once called him "Zesty" and he still doesn't know what it means, she refuses to tell him

- Was homeschooled by PIF

- Has a beauty mark like his mom's

- Has the most angelic, majestic, heartlifting laugh ever, but never actually laughs (unless it's his "evil" laugh, trust me guys)

- Goes to bed at 3am, wakes up at 11am type of person

- Needs glasses because the Samadhi fire fucked up his eyes (in Journey to the West, the samadhi fire is described as a flame that, when activated, "shoots out of every hole in his face" including, of course, his eyes)

- Remember when I said he was a quiet child? Yeah, he can't do that anymore, he literally has no idea how to be quiet now that he's older, the best he can do is whisper shout

- Hopeless romantic, but convinced that any and all feelings are unrequited

- Mei and Mk found his baby pictures once, he will never recover

- Long ass skin and hair care routine, will spend at least two or more hours on it every morning, but it's worth it, his hair and skin are always so soft

- Touch starved as fuck

- Love language is gift giving and positive affirmation (WILL cry if someone compliments him, doesn't matter who it is or what the context is, he once almost burst into tears when Sandy called him a good kid and gave him a pat on the back)

- Once he's focused on something he will stay focused for at least the next ten hours

- Loves strawberry flavored things but hates actual strawberries

- Listens to really underground music and has the biggest superiority complex because of it

- Has the biggest fucking bedroom you have ever seen, with one of those really large and extravagant, super comfortable canopy beds, wakes up like a Disney princess

- Usually self-preserving but will experiment on himself without hesitation if he thinks it'll help him with a breakthrough (has almost died on several occasions)

- She/Her

- Lesbian

- Has tons of piercings: nose, ears, bellybutton, etc (her parents don't know about the bellybutton piercing and she doesn't plan on letting them know anytime soon)

- "Hey, Red boy, cool tattoo!" "... thats a scar." (She still hasn't lived it down)

- Smells like freshly cut grass

- Tallest one in the group, idc what anyone says, I just have a feeling okay?

- Adores glitter makeup but can't stand the feeling of it on her skin

- Love language is quality time

- Has a love/hate relationship with her dragon features, she thinks they look cool and she's proud of her heritage, but if her scales get too dry, which happens very easily, they get really uncomfortable and itchy as all hell

- Had a phase in high school where she'd dye her hair everything except green

- Probably also has Adhd

- Avid tennis player

- Hates the feeling of jeans, but loves denim jackets (has a whole collection, plus one that she and MK have been patching together for years)

- Always smudges her mascara somehow, MK once thought she was crying

- Super rough and rowdy as a kid, like I'm talking pushing kids off swings and down the slide rowdy, tackling people in the sandbox or on the school field, girl was a menace to society

- Snorts when she laughs

- MK tried to scare her once as a joke and her first instinct was to deck him (apologized profusely... before laughing at him)

- Most reckless driver on the planet, it's a wonder how she hasn't gotten her license taken away yet

- Doesn't really consider herself close with her family, she loves them but MK, Tang, Pigsy, and Sandy are her FAMILY, y'know? Like Rosa in b99

- Was the first person to know MK has a crush on Redson, she found out when she walked in on him drawing them together, and she will never let him forget it

- Has a normal skin and hair care routine, and constantly tells Redson that he's insane for needing 2+ hours to complete his

- Is the only one with readable handwriting

- Once stayed up for an entire week to play a new video game that came out

- Will smack her head with a brush if her hair doesn't cooperate

- Bites people (gently, its how she shows affection. Unless she doesn't like you then she'll just naw on your arm until she draws blood)

- Lives on energy drinks, her favorite is Monster Pipeline punch

- Has really soft and really thick hair

- Used to chew on her hair in middle school

- Biggest sweet tooth ever, Redson is disgusted by her eating habits

- Goes on early morning jogs every day except weekends

- Swiftie

- Refuses to watch any movies or shows based on video games she likes because they'll "never have the same charm or energy as the game", but will buy the video games that a show/movie is based on if she watches them before playing

- Will eat random plants all the time. Walking through the park? She'll lean down and pick a flower to chomp on

- The type of girl to carry around a goddamn gallon water bottle everywhere

- Has a thousand fairy lights in her room, it's a fire hazard

[amiharana]

more revalink hcs but from this post

my previous revalink hcs post

2-4 songs that are probably on their iPod

first of all, do not give me free reign to decide what songs characters listen to, you know i'm gonna make half of them bts/kpop songs. that being said,

link: lonely by bts rm, superman (it's not easy) by five for fighting, my time by bts jungkook, and baby by justin bieber

revali: black swan by bts, hit me with your best shot by pat benatar, so bad by stayc, and wonderwall by oasis

(links to both the song and translations have been added for the kpop ones lawl)

they both have breaking free from high school musical though, because it's their couple song and they have to do a duet number to it on karaoke nights with the other champions

the one place they sometimes end up falling asleep – where they’re not supposed to

you're not going to believe this but link frequently falls asleep at the bottom of the flight range and not even revali understands why. i guess it's fairly isolated??? but the updrafts are pretty fucking loud so???

you will almost never catch revali slipping, except when you do. the easy answer would be the flight range hut, but the funnier answer is the heart-shaped hole in the rito rock pillar. why are you there. wait a minute why is link sleeping here too. what the fuck. you people are gay!

the game they'd destroy everyone else at

i learned how to play the card game 'nerts' recently and i think link would eat this game up because he's so competitive. he would absolutely kill at super smash brothers and also minecraft bedwars

revali likes a good challenging game of chess and he plays fire emblem on permadeath mode, fucking nerd lmao. i feel like revali would slay at competitive pokemon though

the emoticon they’d use most often

link uses the 🫡 and 🧍 emojis a lot, but he also gives very much ^_^ and O.o user vibes

revali does a lot of 👍/👎 and 😃 like a boomer, but you'd never guess that he likes the 🍥 emoji. it's because it's cute and reminds him of link 🥺

what they act like when they haven’t had enough sleep

i am the #1 sleepy link enjoyer. there is nothing better on this earth than link drowsily pulling at revali's scarf just to give him a sleepy kiss to his beak and then fall back asleep.

if this is about being sleep-deprived though, link is thoroughly traumatized from constant sleepless nights traveling through hyrule and developing hypervigilance as a survival response. revali feels similarly because he didn't need to sleep as a spirit trapped on medoh so sometimes neither of them can genuinely sleep unless they have each other

otherwise, link is dead silent and stares while revali will verbally threaten to defenestrate you if you even breathe at him wrong. he is 10x more violent if you bother a sleep-deprived link, too.

their preferred hot beverage on really cold nights. or mornings. or whenever

link loves hot chocolate idc idc i will not take any criticism for this. he puts marshmallows in his hot chocolate, he has a sweet tooth

revali enjoys herbal tea. these days, he's been making a blend of hyrule herbs and cool saffinas. link has revali make him tea, sometimes and they sit together in their roost just drinking and talking to each other about their day

how they like to comfort/care for themselves when they’re in a slump

link cooks/eats and naps. he fr the type to stress cook, so the whole village eating a feast tonight if link feels like shit, and he'll much better after cooking and seeing everyone well-fed :) he especially likes to nap on revali, but he'll sleep on just about anything. still prefers to sleep on revali though, and will get pouty until revali gives in

revali flies around the hebra mountains when he feels unmotivated or uninspired, just to enjoy the scenery of his home. if he feels like shit, that means it's time to have a dust bath to maintain his plumage and keep himself clean. link does not understand how bathing in dust makes revali clean, but he has fleshy hylian skin so he wouldn't get it. he also does bow maintenance because if he's not in top shape, neither are his bows

what they wanted to be when they grew up

link would have wanted to stay in hateno and either be a farmer or take over his mother's equestrian training course. i think he'd be a good archery and swordsmanship teacher, too

revali probably still would have wanted to be the greatest warrior and archer of the rito, but i think he would have done well as a bard or also an archery teacher. archery teachers revalink au?

their favorite kind of weather

both of them love a bright sun and clear skies, especially in the brisk wind of the tabantha and hebra regions. idk how to explain it but sunny day no clouds + cold wind just hits different... perfect weather for flying or napping together :)

link does enjoy it when they go into the mountains and it starts snowing, and revali likes it when link enjoys things because he's a simp

thoughts on their singing voice (decent? terrible? soprano? alto?)

y'all already know my thoughts on link's voice and a bit about revali's voice! i need them to sing a duet together!

they're both tenors, but link can hit alto notes in his head voice and revali usually stays in his chest voice and can go a little deeper towards baritone but he mostly has a tenor range

link's voice is sweeter and gentler, and revali's more powerful by volume and is more prone to belting

how/what they like to draw or doodle

link has one of those 'wreck this journal' books and he straight up be throwing that shit off cliffs. lowkey though, i think link would be really good at art and he would make stuff similar to jean-michel basquiat's work.

link has a whole sketchbook of things he drew throughout his journey through hyrule and he's pretty good at realism! but there are a couple of pages blacked out completely with dark scribbles and sometimes revali will wake up in the middle of the night to link sitting in the middle of their roost with the sketchbook open to one of those scribbled out pages, staring at it with blank eyes. revali doesn't ask; he just gets out of the hammock to pull link back into bed and holds him tight, singing softly until link falls back asleep.

revali is very much like fe3h edelgard in which he hides every piece of art he's ever made because he's embarrassed about not being the best at it, except link is good at finding shit and digs it up and puts it on display in their roost. revali can either only draw stick figures or he can paint something straight out of the impressionist era, there is no in between

(he likes to paint things that remind him of link, so quite a few of his paintings are shades of blue, green, and bright yellow because they're colors that remind him of link :>)

[lauratheghost]

I'm gonna complain for a while right now 😂

If you don't care about stranger's problems, this is your warning to scroll.

Also if you don't like hearing about dental problems, you should also scroll.

But I'm having literally the most annoying year ever and I need to just vent to strangers on the internet for a minute.

The day before Christmas, I'm just eating a grilled cheese and one of my back molars just breaks out of nowhere. And of course it's a Friday evening and a holiday weekend so I can't call my dentist until Tuesday.

I go in like a week later my dentist is like "yeah I can't fix that. You need to have it pulled." So I'm like "okay that sucks, but whatever."

So I make the apt to have it pulled and it's for like a month later. So in the meantime I just have a broken tooth for a month.

And then it gets infected. So I go on antibiotics. Finally the apt comes and I walk there (after having an anxiety attack pretty much)

And when I get there I'm not even on their schedule. So I go back the next morning to get my tooth pulled.

(Backstory, my dentist is an asshole. He thinks he has "dry humor" but he's actually just rude as hell and so awful and mean.)

He takes photos of my tooth and pulls it up on the screen and then proceeds to call the dental assistants over to come and laugh at the photo with him. 🙃😞

So that was cool.

Then he starts to try to pull the tooth but I can still feel everything- like the novacaine isn't working.

So he gives me more novacaine and waits precisely one minute before trying again. I can still feel it.

The assistant is like "do you think it's because she's on antibiotics" and he's like "no no it should have worked by now. If you can still feel it you need to go to a surgeon and get anesthesia."

So I go home and after like thirty minutes I'm wayyyy more numb then I was at the office. So I think the numbing just took longer because of the antibiotics and he was just inpatient.

I call the surgeon and they say they can see me in September. (It's like January now)

I have a complete meltdown.

Then my sister basically forces me to get another opinion by a different dentist. So I make appointments at this second office. I go there like a week later. These people are so much nicer- the only downside it that its much further away from where I live.

They look at my tooth and I meet the dentist and he's like "it's a shame you didn't come here sooner I could have saved the tooth."

So now I'm even more pissed at my old dentist. And I'm never going back there again.

But anyways, they schedule me to get it pulled like two weeks later.

I go back and they pull it, and it takes less than a minute probably. It was insanely easy and fast. But when the dentist is done he's like "good news and bad news"

And then he tells me that the broken tooth is out, but in the process, the crown on the tooth next to it came off.

So I once again, have another broken tooth now.

They put a temporary crown on it in February but it still aches all the time and isn't comfortable.

And now, on the opposite side of my mouth, I have a cavity somewhere but I can't pinpoint what tooth it is. But I can't eat anything hot or cold now until it's fixed and I swear I'm so sick of my mouth hurting and eating room temp food. 😩

I have an appointment in five days to hopefully fix the cavity, but I'm scared they aren't gonna fix the right tooth. 😭😂

Anywayssssssss

I'm trying to be positive now but first I just wanted to complain. I need to get it outta my system.

This whole ordeal has left me like traumatized though. I'm so scared to eat any food that's remotely hard now. And just being in pain everyday for like five months has really been getting to me. I actually signed up for therapy again over this 😂

I'm probably being dramatic

But pleaseeee let this year get better soon omg. 🙏🤲✨🖤

[pastel-twilight]

Cocogumi for the ask thing?

Currently my favorite ship of all time!!! I adore this pairing so much. I always compare it to candy - cutesy and sweet; almost sickeningly so. I feel like it's pretty heavily implied to be canon (though I know canon doesn't really matter when it comes to enjoying ships).

This ship encapsulates doomed yuri to the letter. I mean, think about it. The amount of potential for angst and then comfort later down the line is insane. Coco very clearly adores Tsugumi ("darlingest, dearest" ... "my dear, sweet Tsugumi" ... I know what you are) to the point where the fairy princess would more than willingly play knight in shining armor to her princess, even if that involved murder. She spent literal years trying to find a way to set her bestie's Soul free, and when she finally found a solution, she didn't let the nigh impossibility of pulling it off deter her. That's some crazy dedication, especially when you consider Coco doesn't seem to really like anyone. She's... well, a bitch but she's Tsugumi's bitch.

The two girls heavily contrast each other. Tsugumi is softspoken. Coco is loud. Tsugumi speaks in a proper manner. Coco speaks like a valley girl. Tsugumi is polite. Coco is feisty. Tsugumi dresses casually. Coco dresses in clothing that forces her to stand out. And yet, for all their differences, they're confirmed to get along very well. Tsugumi is even able to bring a softer side out of Coco, which nobody else can do nearly as easily. Not to mention, both of them went through traumatic things that led them both to stain their hands with blood (consciously or otherwise). They can heal past the dark times together while still remaining lively and fun.

They frequent Hot Topic and Claire's. Shopping is easily their favorite past time. They have a huuuge collection of plushies that they make kiss from time to time. I imagine they care for a garden as well, treating the flowers as their babies. They bake many sweets together because it relaxes Tsugumi and Coco's sweet tooth is massive. Also, almost every night for them is like a sleepover - pillow fights, makeovers, dress-ups, cheesy movies, the whole shebang. The party never dies with these two.

[caracteresolaires]

2, 12, 18 for nick, tiff, and atlas!

given tumblr’s track record w formatting i’m just. not going to use it.

2. What does your OCs handwriting look like?

NICK has pretty nice handwriting? Definitely readable, a little squared, very utilitarian script. He cannot write in cursive though. TIFFANY has alright handwriting that is too connected (like, whole words will blend together), and the letters are all spaced really far apart. it’s impossible to read but she can read it and that’s what matters :) ATLAS has really tight, square script that is probably the most legible of the three, and no signature to speak of (he just writes his name, or AAA, his initials).

12. What is their character theme song and why? if it has lyrics, which line best fits them?

ohhh Liza! there’s too many! if i had to pick one: NICK’S is Playing with Fire by Brandon Flowers. I can’t even pick one line because it’s all so good, like. thank you brandon for this one. Again, if I had to narrow it down to one or two, ‘This church of mine may not be recognized by steeple / but that doesn’t mean that I will walk without a god’ + ‘Rolling River of Truth, can you spare me a sip? / the Holy Fountain of Youth has been reduced to a drip’ TIFFANY’S characterization was hugely inspired by Hexie Mountains and Let Me Drown by Orville Peck — specifically the lines ‘But wouldn’t it be nice if I could hold it off again? / Wouldn’t it be nice if I could get things off my chest?’ from Hexie and ‘Never knew where was home / I slept a lifetime alone’ + ‘I know with pleasure comes pain / I figured we were the same / But as I get older I get more afraid’ from Let Me Drown. Oh and ‘Drag me ‘round ‘til I never complain’ ATLAS, by comparison, is so well-adjusted :) :) Picking one I would say You’re My Home by Billy Joel — ‘Well, I never had a place that I could call my very own / But that’s alright my love, ‘cause you’re my home’ — again in comparison like, props to the adjusted psyche my guy!

18. What is one thing they only let those closest to them see?

NICK doesn’t get into his past in the Hand (for good reason, it’s definitely a traumatic time), except when it becomes necessary to. He’s also closed about his feelings (like all good characters), specifically when he’s getting close to someone. Flirtation might come more naturally, but real emotion? Good luck. TIFF is pretty private about most things, especially how she’s really doing. She’s perfectly content to ignore her problems in favor of others, and talking about what’s wrong is like trying to pull a tooth. ATLAS is also quite private, but especially about his hobbies, just because he’s not used to people really caring about them. Not that he’s super sad about it, it’s just that most people interact with him as an engineer, not really as a friend. (He does have friends, to be clear.)

[justmenoworries]

WandaVision Theory: Vision Will Rebel Against Wanda And It’s Gonna Get Ugly

A recurring theme in Wandavision seems to be that Vision suspects that something is amiss.

In the very first episode he’s already questioning the world around him, pointing out how his job doesn’t make any logical sense.

Vision: “Would you be so good as to tell me what it is we do here, exactly? Do we make something?”

Coworker: “No.”

Vision: “Right. Do we buy or sell something?”

Coworker: “No and no.”

Vision: “Then what is the purpose of this company?”

Coworker: “All I know is since you got here, productivity has gone up by 300%.”

Vision: “Yes, but what is it we’re producing?”

Most of the time he’s distracted from this uncomfortable line of questioning by the “plot” throwing things his way. But it doesn’t keep him from questioning things and he never forgets any of the strange happenings either, as proven by him recalling his boss’s almost choking in “Now In Color”.

While Wanda has done a good job so far of making him forget or simply undoing anything unusual he might see (the “bee keeper” in “Don’t Touch That Dial”, him confessing he thinks something’s wrong in “Now In Color”) she can’t be with him 24/7.

As “Now In Color” proves, even when freshly mind-wiped, Vision still keeps noticing strange things around him and his analytical mind never takes long to connect the dots. His conversation with Agnes and Herb about “Geraldine”, a.k.a Monica Rambeau and how she doesn’t really belong in Westview visibly affects him. When he’s back inside the house and notices she isn’t there anymore, he immediately asks Wanda where Geraldine went. And he doesn’t seem too satisfied with the answer Wanda gives him that Gerladine “had to rush home”.

I think his speech in that same episode in particluar is huge foreshadowing:

Vision: “It’s more than that (the people of Westview finding them out), isn’t it? Mr. and Mrs. Hart, dinner.... Outside with Herb... I think something’s wrong here, Wanda.”

Add to that the fact that Wanda, in contrast to Vision knows what’s going on, or at least knows that the Westview they live in right now is a fabrication, but chooses to not acknowledge it and keep living the lie.

For the record, I’m not saying not wanting to wake up makes Wanda a villain. She’s been through one traumatic event after another, it’s more than understandable she’d want to keep living in a world where she didn’t have to lose anything (or at least had to lose less) and got the happy ending she wished for. But is that fair to the citizens of Westview, who were forced into the situation and now live in constant terror of her? Is it fair for her to essentially brainwash Vision into not questioning anything? Heck, is it fair to Wanda herself to let her live something she can never truly have?

I imagine Vision will be asking these very same questions and they’ll have a huge disagreement over it. A disagreement that will most likely get violent.

The reason I say this, is because of a very poignant line in the newly released  Mid-Season Trailer (at 0:56).

Vision is asking someone “What is outside of Westview?”

And he sounds pretty distraught, even a little angry. The clip accompanying the line also shows him approaching the edge of Wanda’s barrier, looking like he’s about to cross it. His costume in that scene reveals that this takes place during the Halloween-episode already teased in the official trailer. The same episode, may I remind you, that features this exchange between Agnes and Vision:

Agnes: “Am I dead?”

Vision: “No! Why would you think that?”

Agnes: “Because you are!”

Now I doubt that’s gonna be the episode where Vision finds out everything. In fact, I theorize that this moment somehow takes place during a brief window in which Wanda isn’t “in control”, so to speak, which gives Vision the chance to interact with someone she isn’t currently brainwashing.

Wanda also seems to get more and more protective of her dreamworld and Vision especially. She violently ejects Monica when she accidentally outs herself as an Interloper and when Vision asks if she’s sure she wants to stay in Westview she tells him not to worry and that she has everything “under control”.

So Wanda now kind of knows what’s up but she doesn’t want to let go and will fight tooth and nail to keep her perfect world. Even if that means silencing her own husband and controlling his mind, for his own good, of course.

But will Vision want to play along?

I don’t think so.

Here’s my rough prediction of how this will go, based on the trailers:

During the Halloween-episode, Agnes tells Vision he’s dead, fueling his suspicions from “Now In Color” and “We Interrupt This Program”. However, before she can elaborate, Wanda gains back control and Agnes falls back into her sitcom-personality, doing the witch-cackle from the trailer and passing her remark off as a Halloween-prank. Vision doesn’t believe her.

Something then happens in-between, or maybe Agnes tells him something else, that leads him to wander to the edge of Westview. He discovers the barrier and attempts to cross it.

But the second he does, he is rapidly weakened and falls to his knees, because he cannot exist outside of Westview due to being dead in the real world.

Wanda somehow notices what he’s doing and manages to pull him back by force before he dies. Right before the eyes of S.W.O.R.D, who have seen Vision emerge.

After that, either for some reason Wanda’s memory erasure stops working on Vision (maybe because he made contact with the real world and is therefor now immune) or Wanda succeeds in erasing his memory of the event, but it either comes back or Vision starts asking questions again on his own.

I’m leaning more towards the former, because “What is outside of Westview?” would be a more justified question if Vision managed to catch at least a glimpse of the outside before Wanda retrieved him.

Vision starts to question both Westview and Wanda, demanding to know what is going on. Wanda refuses to tell him.

S.W.O.R.D. now convinced that a malevolent force is keeping everyone trapped, attempt to break into the barrier by force.

This causes a commotion inside and Vision, after realizing Wanda will never tell him the truth, decides to look for answers on his own. Wanda isn’t too happy about it and gears up to stop him by force.

I’m not sure what would happen after that, but it sure won’t be pretty.

Can’t wait for the next episode!

[p1harmonyofficial]

[📰] Get to Know the Members of K-Pop Group P1Harmony With These 10 Fun Facts! (Exclusive)

P1Harmony is a rising global K-Pop troupe, but we wanted Just Jared readers to get an exclusive chance to know them a little better!

The talented six-member boy group first arrived on the scene back in October of 2020, embarking on their international music career with the release of their first mini album DISHARMONY: STAND OUT and feature film, P1H: A New World Begins, which positioned the group as a force to be reckoned with in the music scene.

Amid the pandemic, the group continued to make new music for their fans with the release of their second mini album, DISHARMONY: BREAK OUT, including their slamming, hip-hop infused title track “Scared,”” along with an accompanying music video full of street-style dancing and intense visual effects.

Watch “Scared” and check out these 10 Fun Facts about P1Harmony inside!

INTAK

1. I have more eyelashes on my right eye than my left. Right after my debut, I didn’t really know how to remove eye makeup, so for a while, I used to just rub my eyes really hard with soap and now, I have more eyelashes on my right eye than my left. 2. I used to love oysters, but now I cannot eat it. I was an oyster fanatic, until very recently. I ordered raw oysters after watching a TV show at night with JONGSEOB, and after one bite, I couldn’t eat it anymore. The taste of the “sea” was so pungent. Now, I’m too traumatized! 3. I saved a man’s life. I went chestnut picking with my dad, and found a guy hanging on a cliff and struggling to get back up. We immediately helped him get up. He was really grateful and I remember feeling so proud to have saved someone’s life! 4. I have a small horizontal scar on the right side of my face, and I kind of like it. I got this scar when I was about four or five, and although it’s not that visible now, sometimes I like it because it makes me feel like a charismatic, bad guy! 5. I love dogs. I love dogs, so I have been watching a lot of dog-related videos but I’m terribly allergic. I can’t stop myself from petting them when I see them on the street, and always regret it afterwards because I turn all puffy and itchy! 6. I fantasize a lot about time travel. I even tried and feel like it can really happen one day! I lie down in my bed, put my blanket over my entire body and focus really hard on the idea, but this brings me nowhere but to the future. [Laughs] 7. I have a gold tooth. 8. I have a brown spot (mole) on my middle finger. 9. I love my Crayon Shin-chan character earphones. I get happy just looking at it. 10. I go to the convenient store so much that there isn’t anything I have not tried!

THEO

1. My right shoulder is more developed than my left. I used to play volleyball and would strike with my right arm, so my right shoulder is more developed than my left. 2. I have a red mole. I recently got a red mole on the side of my right neck, but I have no idea where it came from and why but it’s not going away! 3. I can’t burp, literally. I don’t know how to burp and have never burped in my life 4. I only drink carbonated drinks. I rarely drink anything that is NOT carbonated. 5. I don’t like lettuce and tomatoes in my burgers. 6. I had a burst appendix and didn’t know it for a while. I was hospitalized for two months, because they couldn’t find my appendix. Apparently, my organs are shaped and structured differently. 7. I love slippers. Unless I am going to an official engagement or doing promos, I am always in slippers, (even during winter)! 8. I have never cried in front of people until I turned 20. I was watching a very emotional episode of “Animal Farm,” and got caught crying in front of KEEHO, SOUL and JIUNG. Since then, I think I’ve gotten more emotional. I once cried watching JONGSEOB cry, too. 9. I can’t stay still when I’m on the phone. I have to walk around or do something when I’m on the phone. 10. I love singing songs to my friends over the phone.

JIUNG

1. I love Tonkatsu (pork cutlet). I have been addicted to tonkatsu these days and have been eating it almost every day for the last few months. 2. I have the same birthday as my younger brother. My younger brother and I share the same birthday, which is Oct. 7. We were also born around the same time. 3. My younger brother and I have a similar birth time as well. I think he was born like 8 minutes before me or after! 4. I love raw garlic and don’t like kimchi. 5. I only drink flat coca-cola. I purposely decarbonate my coke by shaking it and letting the air out multiple times until the bottle doesn’t expand anymore and the coke is completely flat. 6. I still fit into my hats from my adolescent years. My head is so small that I still fit into all my hats from elementary school. 7. I think too much. I make daily memos and write down almost everything to organize my thoughts. 8. I like to dance and sing when the streets are empty. When no one is around and I’m in a good mood. I love walking down the empty street thinking I’m shooting a music video. I sing, dance and act. Last time, I bumped into someone and I ran away in full embarrassment! [Laughs]. 9. I have a scar on my eye. 10. I may look picky, but I’m not a picky eater! I love trying a lot of different cuisines.

KEEHO

1. I love collecting sunglasses and glasses although my eyesight is near perfect. I love wearing glasses even though I don’t need them to see. I also have been collecting a lot of sunglasses lately. 2. I talk during my sleep, apparently! According to my members, I sleep-talk a lot (almost every night), but I don’t remember any of it and I never have dreams. 3. I have the same birthday as my dad! 4. I can eat salads all day. I love salads! I love eating vegetables, especially celery and carrots, and prefer dressings like ranch and oriental. 5. I am not good at smiling. I have a hard time smiling so I’m still in the process of learning how to smile naturally! I have to make sounds out loud to smile [during photo shoots]. 6. I used to hate wearing sweatpants. I don’t know why but I hated sweatpants and never wore them when I was younger― even if I had to wear something more uncomfortable like slacks or jeans.. Now, I wear them all the time! 7. I rarely cry alone or in front of people. The only person who has seen me cry is INTAK. I was going through something heavy and was alone at a park by myself when INTAK came to pick me up. He started crying as soon as he saw me, and that made me cry. 8. I used to pull all my loose baby teeth. I hated having something loose in my mouth, so instead of waiting to go to the dentist, I used to pull them out on my own. 9. I have a light (barely noticeable) mole on my big toe. 10. I have curly hair, so unless I blow dry it, it goes wild.

SOUL

1. I used to collect beetles. I think I had up to 30 beetles in one big box. 2. I only wear Air Jordans. I only wear Jordans and my favorite design is the Air Jordan 1s. 3. I love dolls! I love buying and collecting dolls. I like anything that is cute and fuzzy. 4. I don’t like taking pictures of humans except KEEHO. I only take pictures of nature, architecture or like a beautiful scenery. The only time I would take a picture of a human is of KEEHO. 5. Me and my younger sister found an important historical stone artifact. We were just digging stuff up and found a stone artifact. We later learned it was a historically valuable artifact, so we donated it to a museum. 6. I wear my pants backwards. 7. I don’t like electric fans. I don’t like when wind blows in my face 8. I once had the same dream three times in a row. I had the same dream three times in a row, but every ending changed depending on the choices I made [in my dream]. 9. A bird pooped on my head while I was on my way to school. Without having much reaction, I just walked to school and waited until I had to go to the bathroom to wash. 10. I don’t get scared or surprised easily. I used to get yelled at for bowing down and saying hi to all the actors playing zombies, monsters or ghosts at haunted houses in theme parks.

JONGSEOB

1. I like books that are thick and with small letters for no particular reason. I tend to buy books that are thick, whatever the genre is. I think it’s because I’m a fast reader. 2. I never had cavities! I love eating sweets like jellies and candies. I can go through a whole pack in one sitting, but I’ve never had cavities! 3. I have something called a “knee hyperextension and/or back knee. My knee bends backwards in a straightened position unlike many people. 4 I love the dark. I usually don’t turn on the lights unless I really have to. 5. I could sleep for long periods of time. I once slept up to 16 straight hours, and I barely have dreams. Maybe like five times a year?! 6. I don’t like/eat seaweed or seagrass. 7. I love walking into a room that is super cold. I turn on the A/C and close the door for about 30 minutes so it can be ice cold before I walk in. 8. I want to learn how to play bass guitar one day! I watch random videos of jam sessions, and one day would really like to play bass guitar. 9. My eyesight is different on both eyes. I am near-sighted on one, and far-sighted on the other. 10. I am pretty good at playing games on my phone.

[ashintheairlikesnow]

(@whimpers-and-whumpers) concept: Chris in college. He has to do a certain number of gen ed credits to get his degree. He ends up in a mythology class. Chris has a breakdown when the class discussion turns to Baldur, Norse god of light and purity.

CW: Referenced past pet whump, traumatic memories, vaaaaague suggestions about past noncon, past whump of a minor, brief internalized ableism, warning for past Oliver being a fucking creep

“Well, this one just has a stupid name,” Ben says, squinting at his mythology textbook, tapping at a page. 

“What, what is it?” Chris and Ben are ‘studying’ together, which today mostly means Ben is studying and Chris is thinking about Laken’s arms when they wear a tank top. 

Ben is on is stomach on his bed, book open in front of him, while Chris lays on his back on the surprisingly plush shaggy rug that Ben bought at Target three weeks ago. Chris could sleep on this thing if he wanted, it’s so comfortable. Not that Chris can’t sleep pretty much anywhere. 

Chris closes his eyes, thinking about Laken’s smile, with their slightly crooked incisor tooth on the one side, when Ben says, “Baldur.”

Chris’s eyes open back up.

Baldur, darlin’. His Sir is calling him, hand on his head, waking him from his doze hidden under his desk, curled into a ball in the safe, dark space. Baldur, wake up, sweetheart, were you dreaming again?

“Why would you name a god Bald-er? Like, celebrate not having hair, I guess. What a stupid name.”

Nicky’s voice, wrinkling his nose, saying I’m not going to call you that when he heard. 

“That’s not, um, not what it, it, it means,” Chris says. Ben doesn’t use the overhead light when Chris is in his room - it buzzes in a way that gets under Chris’s skin. Instead, he uses warm yellowy lamps, and opens the curtains over the window to let outside light in. 

“Oh, you know this?” Ben looks up, and Chris’s face is carefully schooled emptiness, as much as it can be. Ben doesn’t know what to look for, so he doesn’t see it, and that’s what matters.

“Yep,” Chris says, shifting uneasily. Laying on his back suddenly feels wrong and also entirely right, exactly how he’s meant to be. He catches himself and pushes up to seated, looking out Ben’s window, focusing on the blue sky, slivers of white clouds, the gentle rattle of wind against the window when it gusts.

He reminds himself that he can go out there whenever he wants.

“Well... tell me something about him that’s more interesting than this stupid paragraph.” Ben taps the page again.

Sir, can, can, can you-... can you, can-

Words, Baldur. Do you need to practice with the metronome again?

No! No... no thank you... Sir. I, I can... can you... tell me about... the mistletoe, again?

Much better. Of course I can, darlin’. Come kneel here next to me.

“Baldur is, um, is, is... Old Norse it means, um, ‘brave’.” Chris sighs, fiddling with the seam of his pants, shifting his hands up to rub at a rough spot on his knee, then up to the feather necklace he’s always wearing, rubbing at the textured, carved plastic carefully. “Or, you know, in, um, in... sometimes they, they think, it’s the same as, as... same root as Belobog-”

“The same what as what now?” 

“Um, Belobog is, um, is, is, is... is is is, is a, a day... a god of day. Slavic. Um. But, but so, so there’s this idea that maybe Baldur meant, um, Baltas, or, um, an older word like it, because Baldur was, was... beautiful.”

“Beautiful?” Ben watches him with interest, but Chris doesn’t look at him. His Sir’s voice is in his ear, a hand tipping up his chin. Somewhere his Sir is... is still there, not in the big mansion with the hallway anymore, but... he’s somewhere. And Chris can feel him.

“Yeah,” Chris says, almost breathes. “Baldur was, was, was, was... was the most beautiful god.” He feels every line of his face, that his Sir once traced with his fingertips. He’s pretty. He knows he’s pretty. Too beautiful to be for anything else, sweetheart.

“Wow. So, what else do you know about him?”

It starts like this, darlin’. Baldur had a dream...

“Baldur... had a dream,” Chris says, and his voice shifts, slows down. He goes still where he sits on the rug, staring outside at the sky through Ben’s window. He sits perfectly still, breathing in a slow, even in-and-out, as if guided by the ticking of the metronome all over again. “He dreamed... about dying. And his mother did, too. His mother... dreamed his, his death. Just, just like he did.”

Ben’s face is serious and thoughtful, watching as Chris’s thumb stops rubbing at the feather necklace, and it drops back to thump against his chest.

“He was... sad, because the gods... the, the, the gods-... sorry, wrong, um, bad words, I just-... the gods...”

The gods dream in prophecy, Baldur, pretty thing. Never forget. Gods dream futures.

Yes, yes, yes, Sir.

And I dreamed your future, so what does that make me, sweetheart?

Did Sir ever dream this?

“The gods dream in prophecy,” Chris says, echoing his Sir’s voice in his head. “Frigg was, was, was scared.”

“Wait, that’s-” Ben turned pages in his notebook. “You mean Freya?”

“Frigga, Frija, Frigg,” Chris mumbles. The sky outside the window seems so far away, now.

“She, um, she went around and asked... asked, um, everything on Earth to, to... to promise they would never, never hurt Baldur. And... everything did, except... mistletoe.”

“Mistletoe? Like, the shit you kiss under at New Year’s?”

“Right. Everything but, but mistletoe.” He pulls his knees tight to his chest and sits like that, feeling Sir’s hand drift over the back of his neck, two fingers crook underneath soft leather of a collar Chris no longer wears. “It was... small, and a soft, soft thing, unimportant. When... when Loki-”

“Oh, I know who he is,” Ben says confidently, smiling now - but there’s a hint of something like worry in his eyes as he takes in Chris sitting perfectly still, like he’s carved from stone. 

“When, when Loki heard... he had a, a, a spear made of mistletoe. Loki didn’t, didn’t want to get in trouble for murder, so, um... so, so, so so so he gave the spear to, to, to Baldur’s brother, who was blind. Everyone threw things, at, at Baldur, and it bounced off, and Baldur’s smile was... was like the sun. Everyone loved him.”

Who could ever love you, pretty pet, but me?

“Baldur’s brother threw the, the spear. And killed him.”

Ben blinks, shifts forward. “He did? Holy shit.”

“Um, yes. Because, because the mistletoe-”

“Right. Because the mistletoe never promised not to hurt-... wow, that’s dark shit. Loki did that on purpose?”

“Yeah, he, um, he’s Loki. So. But, so, so, so... so this person, Baldur’s own family, um... killed him.”

“Yeah... shit. What happened after that?”

Chris rubs at the back of his neck, and feels the warmth of his Sir’s palm press over his hand, feels his mouth press a kiss to Chris’s coppery hair-

No, his hair is blue now. He did it himself. His hair is blue.

“Baldur,” He whispers, “went, went, went to, to, to... to... to hell-... I mean, um, to, to Hel, the goddess of the underworld. She, she, she saw his beauty and-... kept him. Be, beside her. And... and he couldn’t, couldn’t escape it, and come back, unless everything on earth cried for, for, for, for... for his loss. But one giant refused. So...” He trails off. “That’s, um, that’s... there’s more, but... yeah.”

“Wow.”

Chris swallows.

Well done, darlin’. You’ve never forgotten a single thing you learned for me...

“How do you know all this shit about fucking Norse gods, Chris?” Ben taps his pen on his paper, looking at his own sharp, angular handwriting, the notes he’s been taking all along. 

Unlike Chris’s notebooks, covered in loopy scrawling writing and with the margins full of doodles of shapes and little drawings of animals, Ben’s margins are as neat and empty as they can be. 

Chris usually feels like what his hand draws, a constant movement, a constant shift, filling his life in with his motion. Right now, though, he feels like Ben’s margins, empty open space. Paint over what was there before, and nothing’s left but the blank spots.

Chris shrugs. He pretends he doesn’t feel the soft weight of his Sir’s hand, resting just over the back of his neck, the brush of his lips over Chris’s earlobe, the whisper of his voice sending a shiver down his spine.

Beautiful boy. Would you like to hear about how Odin got his eight-legged horse today, darlin’?

Yes, yes... yes, Sir. Tell... tell me, tell, but can I... after can you tell me about, about Baldur again?

Silly boy. Of course I can. Lay down on your back for me. 

“I, I knew someone,” Chris says, his heart skipping a beat. He can almost feel himself leaning back into a phantom hand through his hair, ready to lay down on navy silk sheets, like none of the good things ever happened.

Like he’s still a beautiful boy, living in hell.

He breathes in, and then out. Tries to replace the feeling of Sir’s arms around him with the daydream he’s been having about Laken’s arms instead. 

“I knew someone who, um... who liked the, the stories about Baldur. A, a long time ago.”

“Yeah?”

“Yeah. A, um... a kid.”

“Like, a brother? I thought you just had your adopted brothers.”

“Um, no, not, not, not... not my brother.” Chris grips onto his feather necklace, again. He can almost feel the warmth of Laken’s skin when they accidentally bump against him in line to get dinner at the dining hall. “Not my brother. Just... just, um, a kid... who was kind of like me.”

---

Tagging: @burtlederp , @finder-of-rings , @endless-whump , @whumpfigure , @slaintetowhump , @astrobly @newandfiguringitout , @doveotions , @pretty-face-breaker , @boxboysandotherwhump , @oops-its-whump @moose-teeth , @cubeswhump , @cupcakes-and-pain @whump-tr0pes @whumpiary - @whimpers-and-whumpers

(Nicky - briefly referenced here - is @orchidscript’s OC Henry)

[slashersins]

you guys sent in lyrics and had me match them , even if i got some of them wrong . but now ima share some lyrics that i relate to the slashers . now it’s not the entire song in some cases , just a few lyrics that vibe . so let’s go !

jason voorhees 

glass half empty , glass half full , well , either way you won't be going thirsty , count your blessings not your flaws . . . there's method in my madness , there's no logic in your sadness , you don't gain a single thing from misery , take it from me 

king by lauren aquilina 

i just . . . i just want jason to love himself . and he deserves to know that he doesn’t need to suffer alone . . . i just got feels for jason and this song . 

michael myers 

a sweet tooth for you , i'm wide awake ,the sugar went straight to my brain , feel like a kid , i double tap , my chest with my fist , i like you , say it back 

sweet tooth by cavetown 

i just feel like michael relating his desire for sweets to the emotions he feels for you would be super cute . and also accurate . 

brahms heelshire 

why would you ever kiss me ? i'm not even half as pretty , you gave her your sweater , it's just polyester , but you like her better , wish i were . . .

heather by conan gray

yearning , desire , wanting . this song has it all and these lyrics make me just feel for brahms . is “she / her” the doll version of him ? is it the grocery boy ? either way , he’s inside the wall and wishing you loved him . 

thomas hewitt 

when i'm older , i'll be silent beside you , i know words won't be enough , and they won't need to know the names on our faces , but they will carry on for us , and it's a long way forward , so trust in me , i'll give them shelter , like you've done for me , and i know , i'm not alone , you'll be watching over us , until you're gone

shelter by porter robinson & madeon

this song makes me think of thomas . he wants to do what’s best for his family . he wants to take care of them . he knows he has to . and he’ll do what he has to so that his family is safe . and he’ll keep doing it until he’s the last one . my sweet boy . . . 

jesse cromeans 

this could be perfection , a venom drippin' in your mouth , singin' like a siren , love me while your wrists are bound , you've been seeing me in your dreams but , i'll be there when your reality drowns

siren by kailee morgue 

i don’t know why . the image of jesse tying you up , or you tying jesse up . is it sex , or the hunt ? playful or dangerous ? either way , i love listening to this song and i always think of jesse and the way the red light of his camera glints on his chrome mask . 

bubba sawyer 

give me strength and gratitude , tell me what it is i can ask of you , tell me what it is that I can't see , tell me now , oh , tell me now , who is it i'm supposed to be

who am i by besomorph 

this just . . . bubba is always trying to do what his family needs , he tries to play his part , his brothers have always told him what to do . so it just . . . it just hits so different , and i can’t help but think of sweet bubby . 

billy loomis 

i wanna be your habit , cut me down like xanax , 'cause if you're nervous you shouldn't be , i'll take away your panic , just leave your head wide open , my love comes in doses , so if you're nervous you shouldn't be , i'll take away your panic

habit by kris trindl & krysta youngs

whether it’s stu or you , i feel like this displays what billy wants . he wants you to be addicted to him . but he also wants to take care of you too . just in his own way . 

stu matcher 

hold me up, tie me down , 'cause i never wanna leave your side , swear to never let you down , and it's been eatin' me alive , you can take me home , you can never let me go , hold me up, hold me up ,  and tie me , tie me down , down

tie me down by gryffin & elley duhé

stu wants to be wanted . he loves so passionately and utterly . is he singing to billy ? to you ? to both ? he’s dedicated , he’s loyal , and he never wants you or billy to let him go . 

vincet sinclair 

yeah, it's funny how you're calling couldn't answer if i wanted , 'cause his lips are on my lips and both my hands are on his body , yeah it's funny how it's different now that i got somebody , yeah it's funny

funny by zedd & jasmine thompson

i cannot listen to this song without thinking of vincent ? and why ? because i picture getting out of a terrible relationship and finding ambrose . because i picture you find vincent , and he finds you and you both find love and happiness , and you’re so so so happy , that even the desperate attempts to get you back after breaking your hard are meaningless because you’re too busy loving vincent . 

bo sinclair 

everybody tries to tell me that i'm going through a phase , i don't know if it's a phase , i just wanna feel okay , yeah , i battle with depression , but the question still remains , is this post-traumatic stressin' or am i suppressing rage ?

popular monster by falling in reverse 

honestly these lyrics just scream bo to me . he’s been told he shouldn’t be so angry , but he is , and it’s all bubbling to the surface all the time . i can’t help just head bang to this part and think about bo doing the same in his garage . 

lester sinclair 

. . . like a back road, drivin' with my eyes closed , i know every curve like the back of my hand , doin' 15 in a 30 , i ain't in no hurry , i'ma take it slow just as fast as i can

body like a back road by sam hunt 

this song is lazy , relaxed , just vibing . yes it’s about making love , but i mean , it’s so casual and fun . just like lester is . 

jacob goodnight 

still waiting , hands shaking , maybe the coast will clear , but these voices, these strange noises , they followed me in here

panic room by au/ra

jacob has to deal with so much . his past haunts him , he’s easily triggered , having ptsd and flash backs . they will always follow him and it scares it . i can’t not here this song and think about my big boy in a constant state of panic . i just want to comfort him . 

martin ( 1977 ) 

oh , baby , i am a wreck when i'm without you , i need you here to stay , i broke all my bones that day i found you , crying at the lake , was it something i said to make you feel like you're a burden ? oh , and if i could take it all back , i swear that i would pull you from the tide

line without a hook by rick montgomery 

much like the first line says , martin is a wreck without you . he wants you to be with him , he just loves you so much that he wants to keep you close , as one of the slashers with yandere tendencies , these lyrics just stick . 

carrie white

look damn good in the dress , zipping up the mess , dancing with your best foot forward , does it get hard , to have to play the part ? nobody's feeling sorry for ya

homecoming queen by kelsea ballerini

this song makes me almost wanna cry . especially when i think about how utterly cruel everyone is to her , and how brave she is to try and get through it . 

[thejosh1980]

Little Wing

(Trigger warning: animal/pet death)

Today, right now, I am sat at the spot where Mijo felt his last sunrise, just 24 hours ago.

He was 28 weeks old, he spent 20 of those weeks with me, and my family. He was my family. He was thrust upon me by my wife and mum, who knew Mijo would be the kind of birthday present I'd want, but could never ask for.

When he arrived he was unexpected. Straight from the car, into my bedroom, onto my lap, what a surprise, it was love at first sight. Those eyes, that tail, that round belly, the fur, I was all in. I had to say goodbye to 4 beautiful pets whom I loved dearly when I left Germany, so then and there I made a quiet, whisper promise to Mijo;

“I'll never ever leave you”...

We began like any other Daddy and cat story, playing, eating, talking to each other. We may have made a few messes on the bed learning to potty train, but I couldn't really fault him, he was perfect. He loved cuddles, got under our feet all the time, talked to us a lot and wanted to be a part of everything happening around the house.

He meowed very loudly too. Sometimes he'd meow from the next room sounding lost and worried. That's when I started to realized something was very different about him. It took about 2 weeks, but then I realized, he was totally deaf!!!! No vacuum cleaner, loud bangs, claps, or door slams could get his attention. When he meowed loudly, it was either because he had to, to feel himself meowing in his head, or he was missing us and could smell us, but not hear us in the next room. I had never had a cat who couldn't hear me call their name, so this was going to be a challenge.

Mijo accepted that challenge...

In a short time I figured out how to clicker train him, using a torch. I love training cats. Most folks think it's impossible, but I've taught cats to fetch, sit and come on command in the past.... So, pretty soon I had him jumping up, over and across chairs and tables on cue. I also learnt a way to “call” him; assuming he could see me, if I knelt down and tapped my leg, he'd come a running. Every time. We had it all figured out.

Grab a harness and a lead, and off we go, walking around the garden. This wasn't a cat, this was a dog. He had very little fear, I mean, he couldn't even hear the birds making a racket or the car driving by or the dog barking next door. He was fixated on me.

I bought him a blow up boat, to use in the pool, to help him get used to floating on water. It was a huge boat for his little size, but he'd hop in, and I'd “treat” him while he got used to the motion. The plan was to build him up to a real boat, or canoe or SUP. I could imagine him walking on water.

He was also great with other cats, so I could take him to visit his cousin and they'd play all day (if we'd let them). He'd come with me to visit other family and then... well, then the real adventures started. Mijo and I could go to the river, the park and the beach. We also went for coffee at the busiest part in the local village, and he took it all in his stride. We took bike rides too, as he sat in a special backpack I had for him. I could hold him while skateboarding or put him on my shoulder as I walked around. He was chill, happy to see and smell his silent world.

When Alex or I came home, and he'd be in the bedroom snoozing or gazing out the window, we could come in, take off our shoes, put our stuff down, maybe run to the loo, then we could snuggle up with him, cause he hadn't heard us arrive. He would just be waiting... He'd just wait for someone to step close enough, blow on his ear, feel a vibration and then he'd meow a big BIG hello, purr and snuggle. He was a no pressure cat... But always ready for hugs and pats.

Besides being deaf, he just didn't seem like any other cat I'd had or even met...

But isn't the way it is with all pets? They're all unique.

He loved Alex. He always had a hard decision between my lap and hers, or sleeping close to one or the other. We had a son to take care of, to love and to enjoy. At the beginning, Alex wasn't sure about having a cat, she'd pretty much always been a dog person, but it didn't take long for Mijo to wrap her around his little paw. She was hooked.

We thought he was going to be grow up to become a big boy. You know, Maine Coon sized 5-6 or maybe 7 kilo. We had high hopes for a dog-like cat, big enough to take on the world. We wanted to show him the world too.

After he had his snip (desexing) in mid March, he wasn't very well, and it really traumatized all of us, we just weren't sure why he took it so badly. He was in a lot of pain, even though the operation itself was quick and really good, with no issues. He would spend the day, in his “bread loaf” position, with his nose to the ground. It was like he was conserving all his energy for when we came home or wanted his attention.

Eventually, after a few weeks he bounced back, back to being his usual self, for a while. He actually lost a lot of fur during this time, most likely due to a reaction to the antibiotics and pain killers. Where his collar and harness were, he lost all his hair. It only took a few days, a bit too quick to realize what was going on, he rarely wore the collar or harness after that. It meant we sometimes lost him in the house without his bell on to tell which room he was in, so I'd be running around turning on and off the lights to get his attention and a meow.

It was our fun game of “Mijo Polo”.

We had noticed he wasn't eating as much, and he wasn't as playful. In fact, all his toys were being ignored, and he rarely chased anything we teased him with. When we took him for playtime with his cousin, he wouldn't last as long play fighting. Something was up, we thought he'd bounce back by now.

Overall, he was a very chilled cat, having just had an operation and now with, ringworm, a tooth problem (one adult tooth was causing him problems and needed to be pulled) maybe that was why he wasn't too interested in food. Surely it wasn't bacteria, an infection or a virus in his blood.

In early May, Mijo developed ringworm, which, by the way, isn't a worm but rather a fungal infection. The vet already had us on anti fungal cream day and night. It's very unusual to get ringworm; it's all around us, but a strong immune system, actually, a decent immune system, would fight off any infection naturally. Cats generally just lick it all off their fur. Humans sometimes get it, from a scratch or a wound. It's in the soil, it's in the air.

When we got the treatment for the ringworm, we also gave him an appetite stimulant, to encourage him to eat, but it made little difference. As nothing changed, we went back to the vet a few days later, and did a hypothyroidism test; the results were borderline.

What could be going on?

At the time of his desexing operation, he was 1.7 kilos, a week later he was down to 1.5 and eventually 1.45 kilo. His body was growing a little, but his muscle and fat wasn't.

We talked to the vet and decided, even though his ringworm was infectious, the tooth had to go, sooner rather than later. It seemed logical that it was his biggest barrier to fulfilling his dietary requirements and his well being. We wanted him fattening up, growing up, and being his usual self again, ASAP. We needed to get him back on track towards good health, enough was enough.

On Monday 17th May I dropped the little guy off at the vet for the day. A check up and a tooth pull.

Before any cat gets an anesthetic, they run a simple blood test to determine if the cat is well enough. During the day we got a call that the operation couldn't happen, and that he'd have to stay in over night or longer, with meds to help him, because his red cell blood count was low. 10%. Most cats need around 40%, if there's any complication with the tooth pull, his blood may not clot.

It's official, he was very unwell.

I was at school when I got the news. I was in shock. Our little boy was that unwell? But he does eat (a little), he does walk on the lead with me, he's eating his treats... was he that unwell?

Suddenly we had to decide on some expensive tests to figure out what was wrong with him. I mean, the red blood cells were being eaten up by the white ones, but why?? We arranged the suggested tests and they kept him in over night.

I was very distraught. How can my little guy be so unwell yet behave well? With that blood count, he shouldn't be able to walk, he should be so lethargic that he can't keep his head up!! He should be in a coma.

All in all, theoretically, he should be dead.

So was it dwarfism, hypothyroidism, mycoplasma??? And and and?? Tests... Blood being taken.. Our boy in the vet over night, alone, worried, scared??? Will he make it through the night? I didn't sleep well...

On Tuesday afternoon the vet let us bring him home. His blood level was down to 9.1%. The idea was that, at least at home he'd have cuddles and love, and that might help his immune system. He was lethargic but not completely terrible. I would need to bring him in on Wednesday for another blood test, to see how he was doing.

On Wednesday, it didn't go well, Mijo had gone from 9 to 8.1% blood level. It was now becoming almost impossible to get any blood out of him. I saw how difficult it was 2 weeks earlier when he had the hypothyroid test, they had to try on both legs and his neck to get a half mil of blood! He was a champ and barely complained. But now, I couldn't imagine the pain he went through with even less blood.

He's been that sick for how long?? Why hadn't we noticed?

We were panicking.

The vet suggested we meet with a mature, more experienced doc, on Thursday. We should be able to figure something out, we had to. Each day = less blood = more chance of...

Well, I am a hopeful guy. I realize, I live on hope. I spent years hoping certain people in my life would change, or love me in a way that I feel some love. I always hope things will change for the better. I don't know why, but it's ingrained in me to feel hopelessness or hope... I think I'm never in the middle... or is that called acceptance? OK, maybe I do feel that too, eventually... But it takes a long long time...

I have videos of Mijo on Thursday 20th, he's cleaning himself in the sun, meowing and purring, happy to see me, walking around the garden with me. Full of life and adventure.

At lunch time, Mijo and I go to the vet. He is his usual cute self, always curious at the vets, and now there's a the new guy he's meeting, what an adventure.

Before he opens the cat box he said something along the lines of “Well, because his blood levels are so low, today is really about deciding if he goes to heaven or not...” I'm not sure, but I know I heard words like “heaven” and “euthanasia” early on in the consultation. Shock was setting in. I barely heard anything else he said, luckily we had Alex on the speaker phone.

Turns out, not only is our little guy deaf, he's an anomaly.

Any cat with 8.1% should be comatose. They should barely be able to walk. They certainly can't pee or poo without help and don't drink or eat much. Mijo came out of his box and sniffed around, was alert and ready to meet the new guy!!

The vet was stumped. He had never seen this before, in over 30 years...

We didn't know he was so sick, because, he was, overall, a well behaved cat. His weight he lost, sure, but he was now at least stable. He was eating, it just took a lot of creativity sometimes to spark his interest (mostly warming up meals and giving him treats).

The vet tried to explain to me, but I'm sure Alex on the phone understood it clearly, that we had very little time, well, no time. We had 3 choices that day. Go to a specialist an hour's drive away, give Mijo steroids and hope he had mycoplasma or Immune mediated hemolytic anemia (IMHA) or, lastly, euthanasia.

Wait???? What does that even mean??

The specialist would give him a blood transfusion, and some special custom drugs which should help him. The vet said it could cost in the 10s of thousands, and may help Mijo for a few weeks, but it's not a solution that we are sure would be long term or not.

Giving Mijo steroids would give him a fighting chance, or not... Basically it could cure or kill him. Because we aren't sure what is the cause of the low blood count, it could be IMHA, mycoplasma or something else, but it's a best educated guess at this rate. If it is the wrong choice, he may die quicker than expected.

Euthanasia, no explanation needed.

We decided on steroids. According to the vet, there was a 50/50 chance it would work. If the cause of the blood cells killing off each other was for or against steroids, we'd know soon enough. Still shocked I tried to understand it all. I'm so grateful Alex was on the line and knows this stuff through experience and study.

The idea of taking Mijo an hour's drive north to the specialist, to a cubicle, a place where we may not be with him 24/7, on the off chance that he wouldn't make it and die alone, we couldn't fathom that.

Mijo took the steroid injection like a champ, he always did injections well. He was given some antibiotics to also help. The vet said, that by Saturday we'll know if it was the right decision. We'd know if he would be getting better...

It was decided that on Monday 24th we'd go back in for a blood test to actually see if the steroids were working (cause apparently one can't really tell with Mijo's behavior, the cheeky monkey).

Mijo and I came home, and well, he ate, he was purring, sitting on my lap. The usual deal. When I went out to get the washing in, he tried to go out too, something we, as parents, have been very protective about. He doesn't go out alone, he doesn't go out without a lead or a bell. He's not an easy cat to find if he runs off, not that he has ever tried. He deaf, he can't hear cars or other dangers out there.

I promised him I'd take him out to that side of the house/garden that afternoon...

So we did, we went out, we sat down, he explored. He was well, good, better, best. He was my boy. He trusted me, I trusted him. I'm always amazed how well he walks by my side, like a dog, with loose leash... Taking my steps as cues when to walk, and when to stop.

We also met the neighbor's dog, which was a first, both were not really interested in each other... But still, Mijo knew there's a lot to live for...

Overnight he went great... Woke up with him on my chest relaxing waiting for me to get up and feed him, luckily I have a wife who had to get up for work at that moment. I remember she sang him a lullaby and held him like a baby. It was really sweet to see how much love they had for each other. Rock-a-bye Mijo...

We wanted to him feel as much love as we could. We felt that, if the steroids and antibiotics were doing their part, and we did ours, there's nothing he can't beat. And he sure felt the love...

I held him while doing some singing exercises, close to my chest. It was something we hadn't done before, and he purred. He'd look up and meow every time I stopped making vibrations. He felt it, I felt it, it was a connection.

We spent a lot of time, reading, relaxing and sitting on laps. Alex and I cuddled him, told him we loved him. He was really fighting. He was eating. He was a little more playful than in recent weeks. He wanted to live. We could feel it...

He went from eating half a packet to 1.5 packets a day, plus dry food. He always wanted treats, and I was always glad to oblige.

By Saturday he was wonder cat! Kneading... Purring... Chasing toys... Eager to hang out...

We'd overcome the problem! He was getting better. There's fight, love and life left in him. He was amazing. If it hadn't been for his ringworm (which was also healing very very well) I'd say he was perfect, especially once he put on another few grams...

We had 4 awesome days, loads of energy and love. He was never alone in the house, and rarely alone in a room. We wanted him to know, to feel, that we loved him so deeply and that all we want was him in our life, for adventures and cuddles.

On Monday morning, his appetite went down... He didn't really eat much...

We all left for the day, work and school. I think we were all worried, but he'd been so good and improved so so much, that we were sure he'd be fine. We have the blood test booked for the afternoon, I'm sure he'll pep up by then. The injection could be wearing off too...

Mijo and I went in to the vet, and his test came back at 14%!!! Damn, that's 6 points!! The vet expected 3 to be a big improvement. In fact, if he had 3 or less, euthanasia may have been the only option... Happy days! He was well. He's going to live! He'll be fine.

We're not out of the woods yet, but we are in the right direction.

All that love we lavished on him, not just in the past days, but the past 4 months. The adventures, the friends he'd made (both human and animal) the smells and sights he'd seen, the vibrations he felt, it was all coming together... He was a fighter with a lot of love to give...

We were over joyed. Really, I couldn't have been happier when I got the results. I gave a “whoop” and threw my fist in the air (I've never done that before in my life!).

We changed to tablet form steroids, as they'll be better long term, keep up the antibiotics and off we go...

But we all know, that often people and animals, when they know they are dying, they give it one last shot. And that was it... We didn't realize until Wednesday, that he wasn't actually going to get better...

Mijo stopped grooming himself, he slowly ate less and less... He became more and more lethargic, he started to sit in the “bread loaf” position with his nose on the ground, as he did after the snip, resting. We thought it was the change in steroids, and as I was at school and the girls at work, we just kept thinking he'd pep up eventually.

When I left for school Wednesday morning, he was alert, but lethargic. When I came home early to check on him, he had really changed again.

His belly was a little bloated, but he had hardly eaten. He had trouble walking, it seemed like it was a mix of muscle degradation/pain and confusion. His meowing changed to a high pitch cry, similar to that of a young kitten. He also stopped eating, he wouldn't even touch any of his tasty treats. He searched for any bit of sun to stand in, but he was looking so uncomfortable, his posture had changed, half sitting, half standing. I was grateful, when I carried him to his water bowl, that he drank a lot. He also went to the toilet, I held his tail so he didn't make a mess on himself.

We spent the afternoon outside, as the sun started to set. He loved the sun, I wanted him to feel warmth... I held him, talked to him. I don't know now many times I asked him to please hold on, please fight and that I loved him. He looked more comfortable in the sun.

I did film us walking around the pool. I am forever grateful for technology, so that I could just put my phone down, touch a button and record a moment. As we walked and talked, oblivious to the camera, I recognized a change in his breathing... I may have missed it previously, but for sure, his breath was becoming more and more labored. Every 3 or 4 breaths, he just had to try harder... His eyes were changing too... But I was sure he could recognize me, the way the vibrations from my chest reached his body and the way I smell. He would react from time to time, shifting or clawing at me.

He often touched my chest with his paw. Reaching out...

Mum and I went to the vet late Wednesday afternoon, the earliest we could. I explained it must be the change of steroids. No, it wasn't. They were the same type, it was just that he wasn't able to fight anymore. We discussed the specialist, called them and made a plan to go in first thing in the morning. I arranged for a friend to come with me, and Thursday morning bright and early, we were going up to get Mijo cured. Transfusion, drugs, you name it, we were going to do it. We had to, we told him we'd make him better.

There and then, Alex and I decided to trade in our honeymoon, you know from the wedding we had 13 months ago and still haven't done the traditional thing of a week or two away somewhere. We decided the money we had aside for that, would go to Mijo's specialist costs, because without Mijo, our honeymoon, whatever and whenever we decide to do it, wouldn't be worth doing, if he wasn't around.

I made a firm plan on how to help him through the night. We would hold him in shifts... All 3 of us... If one showered, the other held him. Dinner time, we shared the responsibility, not that we ate much anyhow. We cuddled, we talked, we purred, I would blow gently on his head... He was feeling love and he was fighting...

Because he hadn't eaten all day, we decided to try feeding him with a syringe, with success. With the tablets we were putting into his stomach, I felt he needed something else down there too... With a small syringe, he took it well, lapping up a tasty liquid treat.

When it was bed time, we put pillows around the bed, incase he fell, because he was very wobbly on his feet. He would cry out at random times, possibly from pain, but I think more from confusion. He sometimes wanted to get away from us, as we know, pets know when it's time and usually disappear, isolate.

We barely slept. I managed about 3 hours... But it was tough.. He wouldn't stay still, and eventually we put him in his little bed, near our bed... Of course he didn't stay there long.

At 4am I heard him crying... I found him under the bed... Alex woke up too... His breathing had changed a lot... Every breath was labored. He wasn't getting enough oxygen.

I laid on my back, and Mijo laid on my chest. This was how it often was, especially when I was reading... We did that until around 7am... Alex taking turns, holding him, talking to him, loving him. Mijo could barely hold himself up, he just laid in our arms... Breathing... His eyes began to glaze over...

We discussed our options, we felt the specialist was now a long shot. We didn't think he'd make the drive, he was near the end. Our little man had little fight left... And we wouldn't forgive ourselves for him dying in a foreign place. There were a lot of tears and back and forwards, including mum coming in for cuddles with the little guy at 5am...

Alex called the emergency vet, and we planned to go in at 8:30... Mijo's time had come...

When the sun comes up, if the blind is open in our bedroom, the sun shines right on through to Alex in bed, Mijo was in her arms, while she drank coffee as the sun rose.

Sometime later I took the little guy out to the pool, where we walked and talked, cuddled and loved, around and around, in the morning sun. I talked to him about all the adventures we had, riding bikes, visiting people, the beach and the river. I spent most of that hour, holding him, looking to his eyes... He gazed up, I just hope he knew it was me. I just knew he felt the vibrations of my words.

We both told him, it was OK to let go now. We were ready. But he kept on fighting for each breath... I think he was just like his Dad, always hopeful..

He last moments at home, where in the chair I'm sat in now. It gets the best light, first thing, even though it's inside the “catio”. Alex had sat down while I was walking outside, I seem to do better when I walk, and I brought him in for cuddles with her in the sun... He was bathed in sunshine, in Alex's arms... It was beautiful...

Actually getting in the car and going to the vet, was tough, but it really hit me when I walked in. I held the little guy, and just burst into middle-aged-man tears and sobbing... If you were there, you'd know I was my mother's son, cause she was sobbing too... I couldn't look anyone in the eye... I didn't understand what was going on, or about to go on...

I think I was in another place...

We went into a consult room, and I just laid the little guy down, not thinking of using the blanket we had... The vet explained the procedure and took him away for his catheter and first injection, some anesthetic? I don't know, but apparently it was the right thing, it helped with his pain.

I couldn't even look Alex or Mum in the eye... I just cried...

I still had hope...

When they came back, Mijo was wrapped in a soft blanket, what a great idea...!! He was quieter, more peaceful... The vet left to give us a moment...

He was still breathing, still fighting... I put my ear to his face, and heard him...

I kept making sure his eye lids closed from time to time. I remember back when Catalina, my little girl in Germany, needed to be anesthetized for a check up. The vet put some put liquid drops in her eyes and made her blink, so her eyes didn't dry out... So for Mijo, I did that every once in a while... I didn't want his eyes to dry up... I wanted him to be able to see me, because laying on that table, he couldn't hear me.

I begged Alex not to bring the vet back in for the final injection... I think I may have screamed something at her... I don't know... I wasn't me... I was trying to hold him in my arms, without moving him... I was trying to give him another chance...

I bawled...

I don't know if I have ever cried like that before... I thought I'd be all cried out... I thought all my tears had already left the building the previous hours and days... But there was more... a lot more... and more to come...

I know that Alex and I held hands over his body... I felt the love... I felt his warmth... his breathing... I know I cried tears onto him, there were tear drops on his lips...

I looked him in the eye as much as I could, but mostly, I cried...

I felt the liquid go into him, I felt it go around my hand into him...

I don't know much about what happened after that... I know I didn't want to leave him, I had promised him I would never do it. I regret not holding him once more... I know that at that moment, I felt the life drain out of me... I felt hope die...

I walked out, not knowing what to do, and flopped down on the grass outside... I never sit on grass, but Mijo liked it...

I managed to drive home...

That was yesterday...

Since then I've tried to rest, tried to come to grips with what has happened, tried to connect with a few friends, I've tried... I'm still trying...

This morning I got up wanting to do some sport, washing, then study and take on the day with confidence... It's a new day, I should take that opportunity to get back into my routine... It took all of 1 minute, from bed to bathroom, to be bawling... Except for the time I manage to calm down enough to type this blog, I've been crying... It's now 10am... I was awake at 6:15...

We are running out of tissues..

I felt so bad this morning, I wanted to plead with Alex not to go to work, because I just can't today. I just can't. We have discussed how she copes in these situations, and I know that's how she copes, by going to work, so I kept my trap shut. I just want her to hug me all day, so I can feel her warmth.

I cried so much on the drive to drop mum off at work this morning, she started crying too, and contemplated not going to work... She wanted to be there for me, but I told her, honestly, I don't think I'd be much company today.

I don't know the grieving process, we haven't learnt that in counseling school yet, but I do know, I'm feeling very lost... I feel very numb...

I can't explain it, and maybe that's why folks can never really explain how they feel after someone close to them, or their pet, has passed. We are just lost.

I also feel that I am grieving for my other losses in my life. It's a bit like, it's a culmination of all the others before him, plus him on top, making me feel pain like I have never experienced before.

Grief is just love, with no place to go... Alex and I talked about that quote last night. I used this quote to help me through leaving my 4 pets in Germany, I know I have to find a new place for my love, but for now, I just can't.

I know I couldn't have gotten through this without the support of my Mum and Alex...

While Mum cries at the drop of a hat, she is solid and thoughtful and loving. Alex is strong and experienced in these matters. She knew what to say, and when, even if I did yell back… Both have a lot of time and patience for me.

I know Alex and Mum feel bad, maybe even guilty, for choosing him. Mijo was a present, to give me joy and love and comfort. And he sure did, in multitudes, to all of us. I would never have gotten a cat back then, I didn't feel Alex or I were ready, we were still working through our issues with our pets in Germany.

Alex and I decided that we want Mijo home with us. He was only on this earth for 6.5 months, we expected him to be with us for 10+ years. Taken too early. Once he's cremated we'll have him in a little urn. He was so small, but if there's a little left over, we will either plant a tree with his ashes or sprinkle him down by the river, the first place he went to that was close to water.

The past day or so, I have shared what happened with some friends, classmates and family, and everyone has been so thoughtful and caring. Thank you, it's really helped to know you're all out there, thinking of the little guy. He would have loved to meet you all.

He was perfection. If someone else had gotten him, realized he was deaf, they may not have given him the adventures and life he had. Mum considers him a rescue cat...

So here I am, in the chair, his last chair in his last moments at home.

I can still smell him on my shirt. When I walk around the house, dazed, I sniff my shirt. He had a wonderful smell. The smell of love and adventure. I hope that smell lasts a life time.

I miss his warmth, his meow, which was damn loud!! I miss, that sometimes he'd get lost around the house... Or he'd lose me, around the house. He was gentle, and only bit me once, by accident, piercing my thumb a little. I miss the fact he had 1 tooth growing forward, directly out, making him a tri-toothed kitten with a protruding top lip! He took on the world without fear. I've never experienced anything like it in a cat. My girl Catalina did sit on my shoulder as I walked down the street in Germany, but Mijo, he let me go skateboarding with him, played guitar with me (he'd chew the strings) and one time, I even vacuumed his tail.

All trust. No fear.

Back when he lost all his hair around his neck and stomach after his snip operation, we were pretty concerned. Funnily enough, it grew back pretty quickly, but it grew back white, not grey. He had a ring around his neck and kind of marks on his back wrapping around to his belly. Alex googled it, and actually found out, cats can often have their hair grow back white after trauma or experiencing extremes of temperature if their hair was cut short or fell out.

About a month ago, I sent my dearest of friends, Sandra, a photo of his regrowth, and she commented looks like “little angel wings”...

Fly on little wing, fly on...

RIP Mijo Angus

12-11-2020 – 27-05-2021

Thanks for reading,

Josh

[austerulous-a]

𝐒𝐞𝐧𝐬𝐞𝐬 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐨𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐫 𝐨𝐝𝐝𝐥𝐲 𝐬𝐩𝐞𝐜𝐢𝐟𝐢𝐜 𝐡𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐜𝐚𝐧𝐨𝐧𝐬 .

1. What does your muse smell like?

Ha, I always seem to ask writing partners this question!  Annie herself has a rather keen sense of smell, and likes to be clean.  Her body’s natural scent is vaguely sweet but given she perspires considerably during martial training, and hit puberty earlier than most, she became fastidious about personal care at a young age.  In the interests of getting as much sleep as possible, Annie tends to wash out of a sink or basin in the morning, and shower in the evening (it’s no accident that this arrangement also means she’s also less likely to have to use communal showers at the same time as anyone else).  In Marley, she often retained the scent of the plain soap her father purchased, while in Paradis scented soaps became her secret indulgence.  Light, floral fragrances are her favourite, and she likes lilac in particular.

2. What do your muse’s hands feel like?

Having suffered with sensitive, itchy skin as a child, Annie is in the habit of frequently using balm or cream on her hands, which makes them soft and smooth to the touch.  That being said, as a result of domestic chores, her silver ring being a permanent fixture on her right forefinger, as well as her military training, Annie’s palms and fingers have some calluses.  For as long as she can remember, she has had cool hands (and feet) but inheriting the Female Titan seems to have exacerbated this to the point where they are frigid much of the time.  Annie’s hands are dainty, in keeping with a girl of her size and stature, while her fingers are dexterous, slender and deceptively delicate; she is strong, and can deliver a crushing handshake if so inclined (never forget this scene from the Lost Girls OVA).

3. What does your muse usually eat in a day?

Annie has an unhealthy relationship with food, and her eating patterns are disordered; she is the sort to forget to eat or to deliberately skip meals, or to binge when the opportunity presents itself.  Given that Annie’s value lies in her physical capabilities, her father was very controlling over her intake, and critical of both her body and her sweet tooth.  You better believe Gabe Leonhardt is the kind of man who would slap a biscuit out of his daughter’s mouth.  The regular, plain meals served by the military work in her favour then, as they provide some sort of structure and nutritional balance.  Of course, her impoverished background (picking mould off fruit and bread was a common occurrence during her childhood, as food close to spoiling was sold at discounted prices) and her appetite mean Annie isn’t a fussy eater.  She will try almost anything once, even dishes others might balk at, or consider an acquired taste.  Adventurous as she is, Annie carries a great deal of trauma around what she was forced to consume by the Marleyan military, as part of their experimentation on her and the Female Titan.  This included cannibalising parts of her fellow Warriors.  Living amongst refugees after the fall of Wall Maria, Annie stole food, and would split these spoils – as well as her rations – with Reiner and Bertholdt.  Sharing food is one of the easiest and most common ways for her to express affection.  Annie does not drink alcohol, her favourite beverage is limeade and she is particularly fond of lavender, lemon and mint flavours.

4. Does your muse have a good singing voice?

Yes, but Annie has little cause to sing, and it would mortify her to be overheard, so she rarely indulges (never underestimate her fear of being laughed at).  Sometimes, she will sing in the shower, or while doing chores alone, but she is far more likely to hum quietly under her breath.  For the record, I think Misaki Fukunaga’s vocals on Annie’s song (Kanojo wa Tsumetai Hitsugi no Nakade / ‘She Lies Within the Cold Coffin’) is a pretty solid representation of her singing voice.

5. Does your muse have any bad habits or nervous tics?

While she has been raised to be adept at disguising her emotions, Annie does have a number of behaviours that are born out of habit, and can be indicative of her mood – namely cracking her knuckles, or twisting her silver ring.  For a time, she had a ‘tell’ during combat where she would blink twice in rapid succession before making a particularly decisive or devastating blow; her father successfully hammered this out of her.  While not a habit per se, during her early childhood she suffered from excoriation disorder, and as such would scratch / pick at her skin, as well as pull out her hair and eyelashes.  As a young adult, swearing forms one of her more obvious bad habits, along with staring, keeping a wholly irregular sleep schedule and forgetting to eat (or conversely eating too much).

6. What does your muse usually look like / wear?

Whenever possible, Annie will remain in her military uniform both for the impersonality and simplicity of it.  Outside of that, she chooses roomy, comfortable and practical clothes in pale and muted colours.  Hoodies form her preference (she will pull the hood up when she wants to shut the world out, or to feel alone) but tunics, sweaters and jumpers also appear in her wardrobe – basically anything that’s relaxed in fit, and doesn’t cling to her upper body.  She is less concerned with trousers being closefitting, and is content to wear cropped varieties or even shorts in hot weather.  Skirts, dresses and more traditional feminine garb usually only feature in her disguises.  Annie is tactile and has a strong preference for soft fabrics, partly because for the comfort they offer her touch-starved self, and partly because she suffered with sensitive skin (an issue that inheriting the Female Titan resolved for her).  For the sake of practicality, Annie will almost always pull her hair back into her trademark messy bun, and likes a heavy, long fringe to hide behind.  Post-crystal, she moves towards wearing her hair down, finding that it helps soften her hard features.  Ultimately, Annie isn’t big on experimentation when it comes to fashion or styling, doesn’t wear make-up, and is concerned only with being clean, comfortable and presentable enough to pass inspections.

7. Is your muse affectionate?  How much?  How so?

There are times when Annie wishes she could be affectionate, but she genuinely doesn’t know how.  Her father deliberately kept her isolated, and dominated her formative years as a remote, unfeeling and largely inexpressive disciplinarian.  The height of care he showed Annie was silently helping her to wrap her swollen hands and feet at the end of particularly gruelling days, or tending to her when she was sick with fever.  His bedside manner was clinical, perfunctory.  Where other parents might hold their child’s hand, he would choose instead to grasp her by the wrist, often gripping her tightly enough to bruise.  Distance has always existed between them and, prior to the Paradis Island Operation, he placed his hand fondly on Annie’s head only once, and embraced her only once, the traumatic context of both instances sullying the contact.  As a result, she watches expressions of affection – mothers dabbing at their children’s sticky faces, friends embracing or tousling each other’s hair, lovers holding hands – with quiet longing and fascination, more often a witness than a participant.  Normally only close to others in combative situations, Annie is hardwired to associate proximity and touch with danger and / or pain.  It isn’t all doom and gloom, however.  With trusted companions or partners, Annie can and will open up, overcoming her concern with boundaries and rejection.  Mostly she expresses affection through small, fleeting touches; the brush of fingers, sitting side by side or leaning against those she is comfortable with.  Along with quality time, physical touch is one of Annie’s primary love languages.

8. What position does your muse sleep in?

Given the abuse that marked her childhood, it’s no accident that Annie assumes an almost defensive position.  Typically she sleeps on her side with her knees drawn up and her hands raised, vaguely mirroring her combative stance.  On occasion she will sleep her head under her pillow, or hide her face in the crook of an elbow.  While she very often dreams of training with her father, she is usually a deep sleeper and doesn’t move around too much – though the odd slumberous punch or kick isn’t unheard of.  Eerily, Annie will sometimes sleep with her eyes open, and she is a frequent sleep-talker.

9. Could you hear your muse in the hallway from another room?

Most likely not.  Courtesy of her martial training, which demands she be light on her feet, and her father’s fervent subscription to the belief that children should be seen and not heard (along with his punishment / correction of any behaviours that he deemed irritating or undesirable) Annie learned to move quietly, to make herself as small and silent a presence as possible.  Being diminutive both as a child and as an adult, she never experienced the clumsiness that often comes with growth spurts and the shifting dimensions of a maturing body.  There is a natural grace and confidence to her movements, but also something soulless and mechanical that has been instilled in her.  Play and the raucousness of childhood was not something Annie was permitted to indulge in at home and it shows; even during her youngest years, she carried herself as an adult might, stiffly and precisely.  This inherent stealthiness is part of what makes her so well-suited to covert operations, along with the fact that she is plain and slight enough to go overlooked.  That being said, when she is especially exhausted or weary, Annie may stumble or move lethargically, and is more likely to be overheard.

tagged by: @oncejaw​​ like a million years ago – I loved doing this, thank you lovely! ♡ tagging: a ton of people were tagged already, so whoever wants to do it.

[purplebunniboy]

Retrograde Character Masterlist

I lied, here are all the characters. I’ll do in depth backstories later.

This probably isn't EVERY character but it's damn near close and just some basics about them that are totally subject to be altered or expanded upon later

---

Afton Family

Michael Frederick Afton/ Fritz Smith/ Mike Schmidt:

Thick curly brown hair, hazel green eyes, grey tshirt with rolled sleeves, tucked into jeans// scars along his face, torso, and arms

Born October 7th, 1969 to Sandra Schmidt and William Afton

The oldest of the Afton children

Loved baseball, got his first bat from Henry

Scar across his nose came from a fight, hand scars came from attempting to pry open Fredbear's mouth during the bite, arm scar came from encounter with the Nightmares, torso scar came from getting scooped, various other scars from animatronic encounters

Fox mask bully, Dayshift worker at Freddy Fazbear’s in 1987, Technician at Circus Baby’s Pizza World and Party Rentals, Nightshift Security Guard at Freddy Fazbear’s in 1998

William David Afton:

Shiny dark hair, soft blue eyes that turned grey the first time he “died”, well-groomed and cared about his looks

Father of Michael, Elizabeth, and Cassidy Afton; Spouse of Sandra Afton

Co-owner of Fredbear’s Family Dinner, Freddy Fazbear’s Pizzeria, Circus Baby’s Pizza World, Fazbear Robotics and Fazbear Entertainment inc.; Owner of Afton Robotics LLC

Cunning, charming, and extremely persuasive, could find out absolutely anything about anyone and use it against them to get what he wanted

Extremely theatrical and loved going over the top in performances, 

Loved robotics and excelled at crafting learning AI, but could never perfect it how he wanted

Drove himself mad with the idea of immortality and legacy

Absolutely hated being called Billy

Did love his kids, at least originally, he’s only Somewhat a heartless monster, but there’s something still beating in that chest of his

Cassandra “Sandra” Bella Schmidt:

Denim jumpsuit, dyed blonde hair, hazel green eyes

Mother of Michael, Elizabeth, and Cassidy Afton. Spouse of William Afton

Was a Broadway actress but left her career behind to marry William and raise her family

Very soft-spoken, only confident when she was on a stage under the spotlight

Had a beautiful singing voice and would often sing her children to sleep, especially if they woke up from night terrors

Elizabeth “Lizzie” Rose Afton:

Dark strawberry blonde hair curled into tight ringlets and pulled back into two ponytails with red ribbon ties, bright green eyes, often wore a lot bright colors

Born May 12th, 1979. Died February 1986

The youngest of the Afton children

Suspected of being the product of an affair as her looks did not resemble her father’s

Did whatever it took to get her way and was very cunning about how she went about doing that

Liked to sing with her mother and was very musically inclined

Evan “Ev” Afton:

Thick brown curls that often fell in front of bright green eyes, white collared shirt a large black tshirt with two white stripes across the chest

Born October 31st, 1975. Bitten by Fredbear October 31st, 1983. “Died” November 5th, 1983

The middle child of the Afton children

Was never the best at communicating with others, complained a lot, fought with his brother constantly at home

After witnessing Charlie’s unaliving, became traumatized and cried all the time

Had a large collection of stuffed animals but was usually carrying around at least one of the Fazbear Plushies

---

Emily Family

Henry Emily

Shoulder length hair always swept or pulled back out of his face, dirty overalls, hands are never clean

Father of Charlotte and Samuel Emily. Spouse of Donna Emily

Treated all the robots the same way he did his own children

Caring and understanding but had a short temper and lacked patience, especially when under a lot of stress

Extremely talented in robotics, excelling in them from an early age. He could make anything look lifelike and real.

Preferred the comfort of his garage workshop over really showing his face

Donna Fitzgerald:

Big and poofy dark hair, dark eyes, high-waisted acid-wash jeans, pink wool turtleneck

Mother of Charlotte and Samuel Emily. Spouse of Henry Emily.

Strong-willed and very loud about her opinions on things.

Very supportive of Henry’s passion with robotics even if the whole topic gave her headaches when she attempted to wrap her brain around the concept

Charlotte “Charlie” Emily:

Denim overalls decorated with marker drawings of flowers, green striped tshirt, green wrist band, untamable brown hair pulled into two high pigtails

Born June 26th, 1978. Died April 5th, 1983

The younger of the Emily children

Extremely empathetic and caring, always went out of her way to care for children smaller than her, wanting them to feel loved and accepted

She was never afraid to get dirty, she always colored outside of the lines on purpose, she wanted to do the daring and unexpected.

Carried around a porcelain doll that was styled like a black and white jester

Her robotic counterpart was the spitting image of the real one

Robotic Charlie was much more sensitive and much more analytical of the world around her

Samuel “Sammy” Jeremy Emily/ Jeremy Fitzgerald:

Born June 24th, 1970. Bitten by Mangle October 7th, 1987

The older of the Emily children

He was always a very gifted child, excelling in mathematics from a very young age, but hit gifted kid burnout by the time he hit highschool

Never had much of an interest in robotics

Patient and gentle, he preferred to keep to himself and would often seek out quiet places he could be alone

Jennifer “Aunt Jen/Jenny” Emily:

Older sister of Henry Emily

Always had an interest in robotics and passed her skills on to her baby brother

Fiercely loyal to family she would do anything she could to protect them and keep them happy, especially Henry since he was the only family she really had left

She was strong-willed, even in her younger years, and able to hold her own very well

---

Before the Bite

Michelle “Mitchie” Peters:

Spiky short brown hair, green t shirt, blue boy shorts, green sweatbands

Bear mask bully

Older sister to Gabriel Peters

Died July 4th,1985

Michael’s closest childhood friend

A tomboy, closet case, and had a major superiority complex or at least pretended to have one

Called the Mama Bear of the group due to her caring deeply for her friends but aggressiveness towards everyone else

David “Davie” Kennedy:

Wavy black hair, red polo shirt with a popped collar, blue bunny mask

Bigger kid and designated meat shield of the group.

Willing to defend his friends to his dying breath.

Inside, he had a soft core. He was the one who would check on each of them, asking if they were ok and if they needed help. His soft core often got him teased by his friends but it never stopped him from wanting to make sure they were always safe

Bunny mask bully, Technician at Circus Baby’s Pizza World and Party Rentals

Christopher “Chris” Houghton:

Short curly dark hair, long sleeve blue shirt

Chicken mask bully

Never left the arcade, living that sweet gamer life

Liked to run his mouth and always needed to have the last word

Vanessa “Nessa/Ness” Abernathy

Dark hair, rainbow clip extensions, dark eyes

Born December 24th, 1970. 

Knew Michael in school, had a crush on him, he was the first one to ever call her Ness and the only one she ever let call her that

Took a robotics class because of him and also got really into coding

Influenced by William and eventually taken completely under his control. She was his eyes and ears in the outside world. Talks to him through the Spring Bonnie plush when non-possessed

Poses as Mike’s therapist to keep an eye on him for William

Matthew “Matt” Griffiths

Older man though no one was sure how old he actually is or if he can even die, choppy hair, thick rimmed glasses

Phone guy

Dayshift worker/ Training Manager at Fredbear’s Family Diner, General Manager of the first Freddy Fazbear’s Pizzeria

Loyal to the company but also put his own well being and safety before anyone else’s

Would not stick his neck out for anybody on his own

Blunt and standoffish, sometimes considered rude though he was never rude to customers or kids

One of Afton’s first “puppets”

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Party of 1985

Susan “Susie” Waylar:

Messy golden blonde curls, blue eyes, pink shirt, bedazzled jeans

Older sister of Samantha Waylar

Best friends with Gabriel Peters

Died June 26th, 1985. Stuffed into Chica

Extremely energetic and always told she should settle and be quieter like her sister

Despite being super messy, constantly having gunk in her hair and under her nails, she had an unnatural ability to always keep her dresses clean

Gabriel “Gabe” Peters:

Straight light brown hair, striped shirt beneath denim overalls, missing front tooth

Younger brother of Mitchie Peters

Died June 26th, 1985. Stuffed into Freddy Fazbear

Stood up for the smaller kids whenever possible

Energetic, never able to settle, and outgoing. Impossible to ever see him not smiling

He was clumsy and always getting hurt accidently.

Best friends with Susie Waylar

Cassidy “Dee-Dee” Richards:

Dark hair always pulled into two uneven pigtails, always wearing yellow

Died June 26th, 1985. Stuffed into Golden Freddy

Pulled a lot of pranks, some lighthearted, some not so much.

Threw tantrums to get what she wanted.

Always wanting to be first, always wanting to come out ahead, always 

Jeremy Velasquez:

Died June 26th, 1985. Stuffed into Bonnie

A generally shy kid who’s loud and energetic around his friends

Started growing out of Freddy’s pretty early on

Susie felt bad for him and invited him to hang out with her and Gabe

Frederick “Fritz” Parker:

Messy auburn hair, pastel pink polo shirt

Died June 26th, 1985. Stuffed into Foxy

Aggressive and rude, rather abrasive and destructive

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Party of 1987

Pete Dinglewood:

Brown hair, red letterman jacket, backwards baseball cap, prosthetic hand and glass eye after being hit by a car and barely surviving.

Died October 4th, 1987. Stuffed into Foxy

Older brother of Charles “Chuck” Dinglewood

Always sticking gum under the tables in the party rooms

Alec Wilkins:

Blonde curly rocker mullet, sci-fi movie shirt with cut off sleeves, braces

Died October 4th, 1987. Stuffed into Freddy

Older brother of Hazel Wilkins

Could be rude at times, always got himself into trouble and pinned with the “problem child” title

Toby Billings:

Fluffy brown hair, mullet, reminds Michael of Cass, pullover sweatshirt with an athletic team’s logo on the front, always putting stuff in his mouth

Died October 4th, 1987. Stuffed into Bonnie

Younger brother of Connor Billings

Wanted to have the highest scores in the arcade

Cracks his knuckles when he’s lying or when he’s nervous which most people will loudly say is gross and annoying

Millicent “Millie” Fitzsimmons:

Dyed black hair always teased and pinned on one side, always wears a lot of black and intense black makeup

Died October 4th, 1987, stuffed into Chica

Best friends with Alec

Lives alone with her grandfather, who is sometimes hired by Fazbear’s or Afton Robotics to fix any minor technical malfunctions with the animatronics

Was there during the grand opening event of Circuse Baby’s when Elizabeth was killed in 1986

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Around Town

Connor Billings:

Brown hair, square face, very hyper and always laughing even if the joke isn’t funny

Phone dude

Older brother of Toby Billings

Became obsessed with the mysteries of the place after looking into the 1987 deaths more

Collected old remnants of the closed down restaurants.

Hired by Henry to find the stuff still haunted to put into Fazbear’s Frights, no questions asked

Lowkey scared of Michael saying, quote, “the guy just gives me bad vibes”

Samantha Waylar:

Older sister of Susie Waylar

Quieter, though who’s to say that equals maturity 

Preferred to keep to herself and her books

She knew how to stand up for herself and was actually better at telling kids off than her sister was

Swear she loved Oliver more

Stanley Martinez:

Technician at Circus Baby’s Pizza World and Party Rentals

Was into tech most of his life.

Known to be a generally kind man, putting others and their well being before himself

He was never one to snoop around and would prefer staying out of other’s business

Clayton “Clay” Burke:

Father of Carlton Burke. Spouse of Betty Burke

Chief of police. Was a detective when the 5 murders happened, worked on the case.

Though he is at times a little air headed, he is very caring of those around him

Carlton Burke:

Ginger hair, dark clothing

Only son of Carlton and Betty Burke

Childhood friends of Charlie, John, and Jessica

Always the kind to crack jokes when the mood was down and laugh in the face of danger.

Art and theatre kid

John Aowyn:

Messy brown hair, white shirt, brown leather jacket

Childhood friend of Charlie, John and Carlton. Had a crush on Charlie

He was a writer and constantly lost in his own fantasy world that sometimes it was hard to pull him out of

Jessica Sinclair:

Shiny light brown hair, brown doe-eyes, always clean cut, fashionable clothing, contagious smile

Childhood friend of Charlie, John and Carlton

Fiercely loyal to her friends, and would do anything to protect them. She hated seeing them sad or hurt and was always there with bandaids and snacks the moment they needed her

Very perceptive and smart, she had a love of forensics and her friends would often put on mystery hunts just for her

Leslie Dunn:

Round face, light hair, police uniform

Police officer/ Detective

A bit blunt at times though not with the intention of being rude

A bit awkward at times

Jack Flores:

Younger man, greasy hair, bright eyes

Nightshift Security Guard at Freddy Fazbear’s Pizzeria

Overly curious, couldn’t keep his nose out of other’s business