#Also small thing but I'll be using a different design for Sun and Moon for SAMS fanart and Security Breach/General Sun and Moon fanart!

[risingblackmoon]

IT'S DONE IT'S FINALLY DONE *explodes*

Behold, Evil Lunar and Sun!! :)

I was trying to experiment with lighting and shading and such but idk if it turned out good?!?"!$!+-$;*

There's other versions under the cut without the background, lighting, and colored lines if you'd like to see those!

[neblina-magico]

Chapter 2

Sleeping In The Sun

You were desperate for a job so you applied to be the daycare Attendants handler! you have no clue what you're signing yourself into but at least you don't have to pay rent now!

Moon hates you, Sun doesn't know how to feel about you and you're just trying to survive.

——————————————————————————

Grabbing my car key and grabbing the security card. Picking up my duffle bag and suitcase I’m now ready to start my job, kind of. I still gotta settle in and all that shit but from the schedule i got sent, today i'll be getting a quick little introduction while being led to the living space. After that I was told that I'm free to walk around and get familiar with the pizza plex. I'll probably explore the daycare though since I'll be working there.

I shuffle my playlist and start driving, seeing the quietness of the outskirts to the slight louder and busier environment of downtown. Then finally i see it, my one true love, my everything, my light, its the fucking pizzaplex. I find a parking spot in some sort of dark edge of the parking lot where its next to the building and covered by some branches and overall seems like a dark corner where you think you'll find a dead rat. Luckily i didn't find a dead rat, if i did i would be crying on the floor with a dead rat in front of me. I dont like seeing bead animals they make me so fucking sad that ill puke. Speaking of piukeing why are the doors to the pizzaplex so fucking big, its gigantic, a whole elephant can fit throught these doors.

Walking past the humungus doors I'm greeted by the eye sore of colours the place has to offer. Ever wanted to remind yourself of all the colours possible, well this place is the place for you. Looking around I see a little robot thing making its way over to me, it's got a cute little pink bow and everything.

“Hello, I'll be your escort and guide for today!”

Cute, like really cute. This robot had the voice of a cheerful and bubbly person, its pretty comforting not gonna lie. I smile and wave at the little robot.

“My name is Daisy! I'm an accessibility assistant, I'm assigned for audio descriptive tours when a kid needs them, but today I'll be guiding you to your new home! Just follow me over to the right of the escalators!”

I follow behind Daisy, she holds a resemblance to the staff bots that lurk around but her cute little pink bow helps differ her from the others. A simple design for an important job, beautiful. Daisy leads me to an area right from the escalators. It's pretty reserved and hidden and very much in the dark.

“This area is pretty secluded? It also feel very omunis.'' I say walking up to a red door that has some sort of weird looking lock on it. It doesn't have any way of putting in a code or even a keyhole, all it has is a small screen and a handle. That's it, a screen, and a silver handle.

“This is your living space! You just have to use your security card to enter inside! I was told that you'll have to go through another door to officially enter your new home and lucky you, you're the only person who has access to it. Meaning i can't go in with you and show you around your home but i'm sure you're smart enough to do that yourself. Well before i leave i'll tell you something that i have been instructed to inform you about, inside your living corders there is an elevator, that elevator will allow you access to the daycare and to the lower grounds, specifically the area near Parts and Services. Welcome back to Fazbear Entertainment and have a faztastic day!”

And off she goes, wheeling her way away. I just looked at her moving away and once she was out of sight she was out of mind. Turning back to facing that eye straining red door, why the fuck is it so bright, i wonder if i could repaint it at somepoint. Maybe to a grey or some sort of green, kind of like that go-away green in disney parks.

Crazy. I put my suitcase and duffle bag down and reached into my back pocket pulling out my security card. I tried swiping my card on the top of the screen, but that doesn’t work. Next I try slapping the card on the screen, that shit doesn’t work. Maybe if I pretend to use the force the stupid door will open. How the fuck do I open this door, why the fuck does there have to be many ways to open the door. Tough love won’t work so maybe some soft love will work.

Tapping the security card on the screen, the door automatically opens. It was an easy and a solution I probably should have figured out with the power of common sense but me being me was too stubborn and dumb to use my brain power and properly open the door. I pick up my duffel bag and grab my suitcase dragging it along with me as I enter the small room. The door closes behind me and I’m greeted by a dark red room with a single ceiling light that was enough to light up the whole room.

There is a long brown couch, it’s a little soft to the touch and on one side there’s a bright blue crescent moon pillow and on the other side sits a bright yellow sun pillow. Right away the centre is a light grey star pillow that honestly looks really huggable at this very moment. Looking around some more I notice a counter top that has a black mini fridge and multiple baskets filled with all sorts of snacks and a coffee maker. There was also a sort of gift basket that has my name on it, looking inside I see that it has a bottle of blueberry wine? That’s something interesting, I mean I’m sure it’ll taste hella good but I’ve never seen blueberry wine, also who the hell even made this thing now that I think about it. When did they have the time to even build all this? Who put those chocolate oranges inside the basket?

I sigh, like obnoxiously sighed, all these questions will probably never get answered no matter how much I wish it all would. On the note with my name on it it says “Welcome back to Fazbear Entertainment!” Peachy. I look at the other eye bleeding red door.

“I guess this is the entrance into my living place. Through the red fucking door i go, maybe ill end up in fucking narnia or some shit”

I let go of my suitcase to open the door, I switched the duffle bag to my right hand and reached for the suitcase before letting the door close behind me. I settle my stuff next to the coat hanger that's conveniently placed right next to the door. Slipping my shoes off and I look around the place. It's much larger than my old apartment, the left side was a living room, pretty plain and empty aside from another couch, a brown coffee table, a TV on of course a tv stand, and two huge ass bookshelves. Fucking perfect, now i got two big ass bookshelves to fit all my books in.

To my left is the ketchen, it's fully furnished which is pretty great. From the first look I notice how the whole place is quite literally sun, moon, and stars theme. It’s pretty neat not gonna lie, I love space and all that shit. Next to the kitchen is a door to what I’ll assume is the office since the door is labeled as “Office”. I pick up my stuff and walk into what I assume is my room, it’s hella big. The bed in here is HUGE. It's a big round circular bed, like who did they expect to sleep on that thing, three huge ass people? Again everything is celestial themed, the whole bed, the rug that’s on the floor, the night stand, the lamp, and the closet. There’s also all my moving boxes in here along with more big bookshelves and a really nice looking vanity.

I notice another door and all I’m going to assume is that the door leads to the bathroom, but I’m too tired to keep exploring instead I want to leave this place and explore the daycare! Dropping my duffel bag on my bed and leaving my suitcase in the room I leave. Noticing the elevator between the bedroom and the office and ran to get my shoes and put them on and run back to the elevator.

“Time to get familiar with Superstar Daycare.”

I whisper to myself before entering the elevator.

——————————————————————————

Last chapter, Chapter 3 will be out in 2-3 weeks. I’ll post some concept drawing for the Daycare Attendant Uniform!!

[blonde-fraumell]

*whisper yells* Just finished first chapter of Repaired Unstable. It totes roocckkeedddd!!!!

Side note before I gush though??? I went to click on your blog and your banner GLITCHED OUT.

It went super small and then zoomed in really fast and then was normal and I was like oh crapples was it a gif this whole time?? But then it happened again in the opposite direction and I was like...nope...deffo glitches out tumblr 😅😅 That had to have been the trippiest thing I've ever had happen🤣

So okay!! RU?? I'm already hooked!! The world building is so darn yummy~ Like you took your time properly building up to that first meeting and ngl I am legit glad because it made me invested~ Also can kinda relate to y/n because my folks kicked me out right after high school graduation (literally the night of mom sat me down and was like "You're a bad influence on your bother and sister and need to leave" despite me never being a party girl or at that point in my life having ever done drugs or gone drinking or anything. Long story short I feel the struggle)

But like hang on tho...SUN IS HOW TALL!?!? Bubbie I'm only 5'4😭😭 He's literally twice my height😭😭

Lol ngl though legit living for it~ Love me a tall lanky boiiiii🤣

Anyway!!!! Since I'm an Undertale fan and I spotted some😏😏 I might just have reading plans for tomorrow hehe💜😏

Love ya buncheesss~

(Also...I may or may not have plans to draw somefin somefin involving RU because I'm a sucker for ur designs and because art things heuheuheu~ I'll be taggin ya when I post em🥰🥰)

AAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH!!! I'm so glad you liked it!❤🧡💛

The glitching is kinda weird (fitting considering what my picture is tho haha). Hopefully it won't act up anymore?

I'm glad Y/N is relatable. They are certainly my more complex Y/N I've written yet (I try to make each Y/N different depending on the story). Also, tall Sun is my life and I am 5'3", so I understand. He can pluck us up from the ground like a cat 🤣

Heeeeee! I will say my Undertale fics are a bit old, so my writing quality is... not the best 😅. Still, I hope you enjoy them! Those are very slow to update since I'm focused on Sun and Moon right now.

(Thank you so much! I would love to see what you come up with! I'm so excited!😆😊🥰)

[tevinterdays]

Was anybody going to tell me Thedas has two moons or was I supposed to find that out while trying to research trade routes myself?

Anyway, I have thoughts about that and spent far, far too much of my night on this.

Laying it out:

We know the second moon is named Satina, but since we don’t know the name of the other, I’m going to call them the primary moon (big boy) and second moon (little guy) when I do refer to them directly. They would have different orbital periods (which should affect the calendar more, but whatever) and both have an equatorial orbit (like our moon does!). These are presumptions, but they’re also how things usually work. Especially considering that Thedas is habitable. That’s important to maintain.

Also, whenever I look at maps of Thedas in detail, I’m reminded that this has to be a teeny tiny planet. That’s not really relevant to this post, but it’s weird to think about.

The main thing covered here will be the effect of this on the tides, but first:

Flavor:

There are two moons in the sky! That’s neat and cool to look at! They would both reflect the sun’s light, so that would make nights brighter. This would have evolutionary effects, potentially, but that’s enough of a technicality in the fast and loose world of Thedas that I’ll pass it by right now. There would be more eclipses, which is also neat. Unfortunately, we never see both of them at once in the games, but here’s a mod to have two moons overhead in the Hissing Wastes.

Tidal effect:

This part is really long. Under the cut!

The primary moon, which we see in the sky in the Hissing Wastes, is either very large or very close in comparison to Earth’s moon (proportionally). Since Earth’s moon is improbably large, it’s more likely that it’s very close, which actually has a more significant effect on its tidal pull than size would (proximity > size; we see this IRL with how minimal the Sun’s affect is on Earth’s tides). The second moon is presumably smaller and further away, but its proximity still has a significant effect on tides.

Most of the time they would balance each other out to a relatively normal cycle, but high tides would be higher on average. Not catastrophically, but higher – and dramatically so when the moons enter orbital resonance (same place in orbit at the same time) and both of their gravitational pulls have affect at the same time!

Initially I thought that that would greatly impact coastal settlements and trade hubs, and it would, but not many that we’re super familiar with. Tides are greater with greater bodies of water, and a lot of the trade centers we see are around the Waking and Shining Seas (Kirkwall, Highever, etc.). They’re just little guys. Western Thedas is mostly landlocked as well, and all of Thedas is sub-equatorial; tidal pull with an equatorial moon decreases the further you are from the equator, since you’re further from the moon(s).

Let's look at some maps! Mostly using the map from Tevinter Nights for reference here:

Cities that aren't named are marked by little symbols that look like houses. I'll give crops of each location for a visual as we go, because everything is small.

Other major coastal regions:

- Tevinter is predominantly coastal at this point in history, but the Nocen Sea isn’t enormous; Seheron is quite close on the other side; and the coast around the Arlathan forest isn’t populated.

- The eastern Ander coast is paralleled across the Colean Sea by a Tevinter peninsula, if they actually make use of that coast.

- Antiva isn’t notably populated north of the White Spire (the Antivan mountain, not the Orlesian Circle Tower, which has given me some grief); its coastal population is on the Rialto Bay.

- Eastern Ferelden has a significant amount of coastline, but the Brecilian Forest blocks most of it off, and Gwaren (city south of the Forest) is far south enough that it’s probably bordering the planet’s Antarctic circle.

- Those little northwestern Fereldan islands don't have coastal focuses. Image from the wiki used because Alamar's tiny.

- Northern Seheron would be affected. We don’t know the concentrations of Seheron’s population. Much of Par Vollen would also be affected and the same holds true for them, but their technology (extremely seaworthy vessels, extreme perseverance, etc.) and cultural mindset lends to the idea that they would use the tides to their advantage strategically, as well as take advantage of the major boons spring tide would have on fishing! When the tide is coming in to its highest, it shakes things up and brings in all the fish.

- Rivain isn’t notably populated east of its dominating mountains. Its major population centers are in the Southeast, on the Rialto Bay. Except Llomeryn. Rivain, as descendants of seafaring islanders, would have a long cultural history of being able to deal with this anyway. Why is Llomeryn (little house icon on the east coast of the southern island) on that side? I don’t know. It doesn’t make sense. It’s fine.

- I’m sure that Estwatch is doing just fine. They can handle themselves.

- Wycome is a major fishing hot-spot, taking advantage of the fishy boons the tides provide.

- Hercinia is coping, I guess.

In regards to coastal port cities on the Amaranthine ocean – the largest body of water on the map – a special situation may exist where they have ports designed to accommodate the very high high tides when they come in (how often would depend on the moons’ orbital periods and how often they are in orbital resonance). I’m sure there are examples of docks and ports designed like this from real life, and if anyone has info on that, hit me up.

This concludes the post about the implications of two moons in Thedas that nobody asked for!

Huge thanks to @feastforworms and @unshatters-your-teacup for science and input and humoring me on this.

[goose-books]

If ur still doing the soft asks can I maybe have some Hiltharrow content 👉🏻👈🏻

oh ABSOLUTELY you can. for context for everyone who isn't one of like ten people who has Very Specific Godsong Lore, hiltharrow is a side character, a 19-year-old woman-king anna has to seek help from at some point, and she's a menace (affectionate) (derogatory). soft meme here; godsong here!

what they smell like: this is always such a specific question dear god but she does have a particular perfume she wears; i think it's rosewater. she got into the habit of wearing it as a princess to cover up the scent of, coughs, illicit substances. and then she ended up liking it

what their favorite smells in the world are: crisp night air, firewood, & the aforementioned perfume

what pajamas they wear: sleepwear is one of the only times you'll see her in feminine clothing (she's the king! it's a political thing as much as a gender thing in her kingdom), but even then it's not, like, a nightgown; i am so uneducated on medieval underwear but i'm picturing her in a slip and boxer brief versions of the pumpkin shorts

my favorite ship (if applicable) and a cute hc about them: hiltharrow is canonically in a throuple by which i mean she semi-accidentally infiltrated an existing lesbian relationship. anyway her family's royal crest is a sun & Knight GF's family insignia is a moon so they both designed a little star insignia for Courtier GF, who was like "...thanks, did you both have this idea independently" (<-- quietly very touched)

my favorite friendship (if applicable) and a cute hc about them: i do not know if she has friends. scream. she does vibe with ichari at some point, though! though ichari's eight or nine years older, so they're constantly caught between "this kid is fucking hilarious" and "oh my god that's a kid."

a song that reminds me of them: "kings" by tribe society is the obvious one, but that's too easy so i'll also offer this specific cover of smells like teen spirit

what animal i think they would be if they were an animal: in godsong-verse? i think she'd make a very good wyvern. they're small and cunning and they blend in well and they also bite. in terms of real animals, the obvious answer is a fox, but come on, there are like three different godsong characters who i could say that for. we can't ALL be foxes

what position they sleep in: not... soundly? in her Worse days she used to just come home completely smashed and crash barely on the bed. but even now (sober) she does a lot of tossing and turning (literally in charge of a country)

their favorite drink: [sober hiltharrow voice] all right, now, that's just cruel

a gift i would give them if i could: i'd say her father back, but people still aren't sure whether she killed him.

[angelbabyszn]

Just The Way You Are (Oscar X Plus Size Reader)

Requested!

A/N: I decided to make this a full plus size imagine. Plus size women are not appreciated enough and society needs to change their view on people's body types like why are you so obsessed with what people's bodies like? Worry about yourself and change your body for you, not other people.

Plus size is slowly starting to get accepted but not enough. Hopefully, the world would accept us completely without saying anything negative about it because it was how our bodies were built and made by God himself one day.

I'm proud to be one. If you don't accept it, you can completely stop following me and not read any of my imagines again. 

If you are one like me, you are so beautiful and amazing! Take time everyday and appreciate where your body takes you everywhere and love the amazing curves you got! Plus size/slim thick is trending now so, go ahead and walk into that room in that outfit you don't usually put on and make people give their full undivided attention to your beautiful, amazing, outgoing self with your beautiful curves!

I hope you enjoy this. I just have to say that to anyone who doesn't believe in plus size women. You can still read this if you're not plus size. You are welcome to request an imagine with any different size, race, height, sexuality, anything you can think of.

Remember, your body is beautiful and don't change it for nobody except for your amazing self! Bye! Thanks for the support and reading my imagines all the way till now. This becomes my 50th imagine omg 🥺 okay, I'm done. Enjoy. Bye ily -angelbabyszn ❤️

OMB Masterlist

F/C - Favorite Color

F/F - Favorite Fruit

"Y/N!" shouted your younger sister, Monse in front of you annoyed.

Monse was shouting out your name for the past two minutes, trying to get your attention but you weren't answering.

You continue to write lyrics on your towel underneath an umbrella while listening to your beat you made through your headphones.

Music is the only thing that understands and helps you get through community college and all of the negative comments about you.

Where's the negative comments coming from? People usually make small comments of your weight. You're a plus - size girl.

At certain times, some comments could ruin your day but you don't let it in your head too much.

Monse growled in anger and took off your headphones quickly. You look up at her crazy.

"Monse!"

"Come on and have fun with us. It's a good day to be out here on the beach. Spooky's here..." said Monse grinning, knowing that you like him.

You hit Monse in her left arm and she faked being in pain with no sound coming out.

"I know that! We're just friends. Also, he wouldn't like a girl like me. Nobody don't like girls my size." you said as you start to get sad again. 

You tried to grab your headphones back but failed. Instead, you got a hit from Monse which actually hurt you.

"Monse!" you shouted while grabbing your right arm with your left hand at the spot where she hit you at.

"What did I tell you about talking yourself down! You're so beautiful! Anybody is blind if they don't see it!" said Monse.

"Okay, sure. Now, can you hand me my headphones?" you asked after you got up from your towel and have your hand out to her.

"Y/N! Sweetie, what are you doing?! Your very fine a*s Spooky over there and you're not in your good-looking swimsuit seducing him!"

"Jasmine." you and Monse said in sync looking at her with a dirty look.

"What? I'm just saying. He likes you." said Jasmine and took a sip of her soda she has in her hand.

"No, he doesn't. I'm just a big-"

"Say something negative about your curvy thick self, I'll slap your negative mind to the moon." said Jasmine with a scowl face. Your and Monse's faces become full of fear.

"Now, we got that settled, take off those clothes and show your beautiful a*s self to the world!" said Jasmine excitedly. She went over to you and grabbed the end of your shirt but you stopped her. 

"Um, Jas?"

"Yes?"

"I'm not used to people taking my clothes off of me." you said while taking off her hands off of your shirt slowly.

"Oh sorry," said Jasmine and she put her drink down next to her beach chair and started going back to the guys in the ocean having fun "don't be afraid Y/N! You got this!"

You nodded softly and you took a deep breath as you grabbed the bottom of your shirt but stopped in fear.

"You're beautiful." said Monse and you felt your mouth curving into a smile.

"Thanks. You're beautiful too." you commented back and both of you did a side hug. 

Monse smiles at you and she turns around to jog back to her group of friends.

You took another deep breath again and grip the bottom of your shirt again with both of your hands.

"Y/N!"

You quickly looked up and you felt a blush crept on your face to see who called you. 

It was Spooky who was looking at you with a smile plastered on his face. He was shirtless in his swim shorts with the sun beautifully shining on him.

Your jaw fell a bit at the sight of him. He was glowing. F*cking glowing. Making his muscles and abs more defined than it was.

Your face went emotionless not knowing what to do or say. This is definitely not helping at the moment.

Spooky grinned at you and looked down to the water because of the sight of you. It was hard to control himself by the way you were looking at him.

"Um, you coming?" shouted Spooky with his eyebrows furrowed and his eyes narrowed to not get blind by the sun while looking at you.

You shake your head to get back into reality and quickly nod your head in response. Spooky nodded and turned back to Cesar's friends.

"You got this." you said to yourself grabbing your end of your shirt again. You took a deep breath and you started taking off your clothes.

-

"Looking good Y/N! I see you! I see you." said Jasmine with a beam on her face as she saw you entering the ocean for the first time today.

You were wearing a F/C one piece swimsuit that has a skirt to cover your bottom and was decorated in gold designs.

"Thanks. Um, where's Spooky?" you asked the group of friends while trying to get used to the cold ocean.

A moment later, you felt ice water fall on your head rushed on your body. You close your eyes to protect them as water is poured on you.

You open your eyes again to see you drenched in cold water. You start shivering only for a few seconds because it was super warm outside.

You shake some extra water that was dripping on you from your hands into the ocean. You look up to see the friend group with their eyes widened and jaws dropped.

You immediately slapped a fake smile and you started to twitch your smile and your finger. The young teenagers start to be afraid as you start to twitch your head to the right knowing you were full of rage.

"I DIDN'T DO IT!" shouted Jamal and put his hands up in defense. The rest of the friend group look at him with a stupid faces.

"What? I'm making my statement. Making sure nobody don't blame me like y'all always do!" shouted Jamal and Monse rolled her eyes at him.

You turn around very slowly with your fake smile to see your only guy friend, Spooky with a huge stupid grin on his face with a blue bucket in front of him.

"Y/N-"

"SPOOKY!" you yelled interrupting Ruby's concern. You growled furiously and you went full on hunter mode. Spooky quickly put the bucket over your head and started to swim away.

You screamed as you quickly took the bucket off of your head and threw it behind you not caring where it landed. You continue swimming to catch up to Spooky to kill him.

"HEY!"

Jasmine, Monse, Ruby, and Cesar follow the sound of the voice to see Jamal's head covered by the blue bucket. It landed on him unnaturally.

The group started to laugh hard as Jamal crossed his arms against his chest upset underneath the bucket. 

"How inconvenient is that?" said Ruby as he was laughing.

"It's not funny!"

"Oh, it is." said Cesar laughing and he puts his left hand on Jamal's right shoulder with a grin on his face.

Jamal turns to Cesar and he quickly puts the bucket on his head. Jamal starts to laugh at him.

Cesar quickly took off the bucket, threw it behind him, and tackled Jamal into the water causing a play fight between them.

Ruby continued to laugh at his guy friends until he saw blue in front of him unexpectedly.

"This did not happen." said Ruby with his right point finger pointing at the bucket on his head.

"Okay, babe. You know I'll still date you even if you're wearing a bucket." said Jasmine and she quickly grabbed and hugged him tight.

"Jasmine! Let go!" shouted Ruby in annoyance while trying to wiggle out of her arms, causing the bucket to fall off his head and into the water.

"Spooky! Come back here!" you shouted angrily at him a few feet away from you.

"Come get me, babygirl." said Spooky and he turned back and winked with a smirk on his face. It made you forget what you were doing at the moment.

Spooky starts to swim away again and you quickly start swimming again to catch up to him. A few moments later, you felt yourself getting lower, and lower into the ocean.

"Spooky! Ah! Help!" you shouted quickly as ocean waters started to move a bit too quickly for you and you felt no ground to your feet.

"Spoo-"

You went underwater and you felt yourself sinking. You try to swim up but you feel your weight pulling you down faster.

Your eyes widened and felt your eyes starting to close completely. You try to move upwards again but your eyes completely shut. Was this your last moment of life?

-

"Y/N! Y/N! Wake up!"

You slowly opened your eyes and you saw your worried sister, her friends, and for the first time ever, a worried Spooky.

You start to lean up but everybody around you starts to talk over each other saying to lay back down so you did.

"What happened?" you asked while bringing your right hand on top of your forehead to get your mind waking up again. You jumped a bit when you felt a cold ice pack put on top of your forehead.

"You almost drowned. Luckily, Spooky was there to save you." said Ruby and you turn your head to Spooky on your right looking back at you.

"Um, I'll stay here with her. To make sure nothing happens," said Spooky. He grabs his dry shorts, pulls out some money, and puts it in Cesar's hand. "go get some food. Bring something back for us."

"Okay." said Cesar and Monse leans down to you and starts to caress your cheek "I'm glad you're okay. I love you."

"I love you too." you said and the core five got up and started walking to find something to eat.

"You gonna tell me where you got that money from?" you asked, looking at Spooky stupidly and he started to laugh.

"What did I tell you, mami? It's none of your business." said Spooky and you roll your eyes.

"Anyways, I'm sorry if I was so heavy to save. You didn't have to." you said as your smile starts to fade and negative thoughts start to flow through your head again.

"You weren't. It's no problem. I can carry you anywhere if you want." said Spooky and you look at him with a twisted face.

Your eyes start to flow down to his body to see his abs and muscles that were still defined and water dripping after being out of the water. You shake your head mentality to get back to reality again. 

"Yeah, sure you can." you said and you start to laugh a bit knowing he can't. A few moments later, you screamed as you felt yourself being lifted in the air by Spooky.

"Put me down." you said with a pout face with your arms crossed against your chest. Spooky was currently carrying you in maiden style.

"I don't want to, I like this position you are in. In my arms." said Spooky and he scans up and down your body until his eyes meet yours again.

You did a shy laugh as you looked away from him. You didn't want him to see the blush that was forming on your face.

"Hola hermoso."

You and Spooky looked up to see a good-looking girl with a great body in a two piece gold bikini. Spooky put you down softly and both of you look at the girl with weird faces.

"When you're done talking to that fatty, you should come over here and I'll change your life." said the girl and she blows a kiss at Spooky.

You felt your heart burning in jealousy and also breaking into million pieces. It still hurts you when people say things about your body. You just wanted to blow her head off.

"I'm not interested." said Spooky and he crosses his arms against his chest.

"Oh, come on. I know you're interested. I can tell. I got this amazing body that everybody would die for. Not this ugliness over here." said the girl walking closer to him and starts to touch his right arm muscles.

You couldn't take this no more. You almost die by drowning and now you're getting bullied again by another gorgeous girl for the guy you're interested in.

You started to cry hard, making Spooky move away from the girl quickly going over to you. He sees you grabbing your things quickly and putting on your overall clothes.

"Y/N! Wait!"

"No! Just be with that gorgeous thin model! You could care less about me!" you shouted and you quickly threw the ice pack in the sand. You start going to your car leaving before Spooky could chase after you.

You try to dry up your tears in the car but they keep on flowing down. You were done with every negative comment that every single person has said to you that made you worse and worse. 

You know what you have to do now and it's the only way to calm you down and make you feel good about yourself.

-

An hour later, you sighed feeling numb as you walked back into your homemade studio in the backyard storage.

Once you got home, you immediately took a shower, changed into dry clothes, and went in there with no hesitation.

You couldn't believe what happened on the beach today. You don't even want to talk about it. Music was you escaping at the moment but today it was so bad, it wasn't working like it used to.

"Okay. Y/N, calm down. It's over." you said calming yourself and start eating F/F while drinking a small water in your homemade studio.

You were playing different beats that had no lyrics yet to choose what to record today while enjoying your snack break. A few beats later, you immediately got up with your eyes widened.

You quickly grab your pen and start a new page in your songwriting notebook as lyrics are just popping in your mind. You replay the beat and at a good time, you start writing your lyrics.

-

"Coming!" shouted Monse after hearing the front door knocked a couple of times. She opened the door and gasped to see Spooky's front of her.

"Hey. You mind telling me where Y/N is? I've tried contacting her for hours while going to her favorite places. She's not answering or at those places." asked Spooky.

Spooky been worrying about you for hours. He hates seeing you hurt especially when somebody says something about your weight.

It makes him want to hurt the woman. Obviously he couldn't hurt a woman so he just calls her a puta and walks away.

It took him a while to be friends with you. You were not easy to crack into and he completely understands it because people would become your friend to just break you down again.

It didn't take long before Spooky started to develop feelings for you. Spooky would sometimes flirt and you would never catch it at all which amuses him.

Now, he can't find you anywhere in Freeridge. He just hoped he would find you soon and didn't miss his chance.

"She's in the backyard. In her "homemade studio". said Monse while using her index fingers kinda annoyed.

"Can I see her?"

"No, you can not! You broke her today! Have you done enough! Y/N deserves better-"

Monse quickly turns around and puts her right hand on top of Jasmine's mouth to stop her talking. Now, she was regretting bringing Jasmine here to her house after the beach.

"I'll show you." said Monse with a fake smile on her face and opened the door wider as Spooky came in.

Monse slowly took her hand off of Jasmine's mouth and started to lead Spooky through her house to the backyard where you were.

Once he was outside again, he heard singing in the distance but it was muffled. He looked ahead to see what seemed like a storage room but lights were on.

"There she is. Please be careful with her words. You kinda know how my sister is. Anything bad happens, I'ma pull Jasmine out here." said Monse looking at Spooky with a serious face and her arms crossed against her chest.

Spooky nodded quickly and Monse hit his left shoulder a few times with her right hand for encouragement and walked back into the house.

Spooky took a deep breath and slowly opened the door. As he enters the room, he sees you with your back faced to him singing into the microphone with your headphones on.

You were in the middle of recording and Spooky grinned as he heard you singing. He never thought you could sing but you really could and sounded real good.

"You can sing, hermosa." said Spooky and you jumped in horror causing you to stop singing.

You wouldn't usually jump when recording and hearing Monse's voice. You hearing a deep males voice caused your fright. .

You slowly turned around and became blank seeing Spooky was here, in your homemade studio leaning against the doorway looking at you.

"How's it going?"

You grab a bat, the first thing that would probably help kick him out of your studio. You start charging at him with the bat in your hand about to swing

"Wait!," shouted Spooky with his hands up and out in front of him, looking at you with his eyes widened. You stop charging at him but you was in a position ready to swing "before you go all Harley Quinn on me,"

You rolled your eyes at Spooky comparisons. "I just want to talk to you."

"What is there to talk about? Where's your new girl, eh? She's probably in your car." you said. Your heart starts to burn again in jealousy but quickly stops knowing he would never be interested in you.

"Nah. I never wanted her. I don't like my chica with nothing to grab." said Spooky. You slowly start to put your bat down as his sentence starts to process in your mind.

"W-well. What are you doing here, anyways?" you said stuttering a bit.

"To see you." said Spooky while walking into the studio completely and closing the door behind him.

"Why? I didn't think we were that close." you said and completely dropped your bat on the floor and sat down on the small couch.

"Yeah, we are," said Spooky as he sat next to you. "I've been so worried about you. You just ran away after coming back from almost drowning. I was looking for you everywhere."

"Really?" you asked looking at him and he nodded. You felt your heart skipping a beat. You didn't know he was looking for you all this time. He was actually worried. Does that mean anything?

 "I'm sorry for the trouble. You didn't have to. I was fine here." you said and you turn back to your studio in front of you.

"Well, I didn't know you have a homemade studio or you could sing. I'm still learning about you everyday." said Spooky and he slowly puts his arm around your shoulder, making you tense up a bit.

"Is this okay? You seem kinda scared of me."

"No! I'm not! Really, I...just never have everybody wrap their shoulder around me." you said trying to convince him but he already understands. You slowly start to get comfortable with him again and your tension goes away.

"Why are you so...invested in me? I'm just a plus size girl that nobody wants to be friends or be somebody's girlfriend with." you asked and turned away starting to feel negative about yourself again.

Spooky grabs your chin and leans it towards him. He continues on holding it in his left fingers. You felt tension again as you started feeling his soul burning into yours by his eyes. 

"Y/N, I like you. I really do. More than friends. I hate that you're putting yourself down everyday like it's okay but it's not. You're so beautiful, amazing, smart, unique, and your body is a special feature of you that I love so much." said Spooky and he grabs your waist with his left hand and starts to caress it softly.

A warm rush through your body as you felt his touch on yours. He does it so softly that it causes you to blush straight up at him.

"I'm sorry, I-"

"God, you're cute." said Spooky in a very husky voice, making you shiver your whole body for a few moments.

Seeing him getting closer is making you even more nervous of what's going to happen. Spooky knowing he got to lead in this, he continues this vibe at the moment.

"Don't think, mi amor." said Spooky and all of sudden, you felt lips connected to yours. Your eyes widened at the sight to see him kissing you softly.

You hesitated as you started to get more and more into the kiss until you were kissing him back completely. You couldn't believe you were kissing the guy you were interested in for months. It's unbelievable.

Both of you ended the kiss and looked into each other's eyes deeply. You didn't know what to say.

"That was so worth it." said Spooky with a smile on his face.

"It sure was." you said and you gained a huge grin on your face, causing him to chuckle a bit.

"What am I going to do about you?" asked Spooky and you shrugged not knowing what to do.

"Let me kiss those lips again." said Spooky and he quickly pulls you on your lap. Your legs ended up straddling his waist to the couch, making you gain a red blush.

"Spooky-"

His hands landed on your waist and carefully caressed it which caused a huge warm emotion going through your body again. He kisses you again, making you lean into him kissing him back.

This day completely flipped as you finally got a boyfriend who actually loves you and your curvy body. You never want to change anything in this moment for the world.

[avery-allyss]

I guess this could be worse.

The assignment was to create a design based off of one or more creation myths. I have little hints of several because copying something too closely seems redundant. Yes it a bit of a confusing jumble and you need to stretch a lil to pick up all the references, but I like it that way.

Egg shape is from several myths, mainly because my favorite myth is the Finnish creation myth, which is also the source of the duck. I'll get more into that further down in the reflective portion of this post.

The yin/yang base for the devision of the egg is from Asia. The concept is more into the description of the energies, the yang being masculine firey intenseness of light, and the yin being the quite coolness of darkness.

The volcano ang glacier are derived from Norse mythology, and I played with the idea of making some sort of root system in the line separating the two to represent the beginning of yggdrasil.

The reeds and cat are from the native American myth. Something about a Reed carrying the founders through worlds, and loosing a war to cat people? It stuck in my mind.

This is the second time I've ever done print making, the first was over ten years ago and stamping a smaller design on an extra large Tshirt I still use as pjs.

The entire process was a mess.

We had one linoleum panel to work with. We had to carve away each color we wanted to keep.

I started slow because the white and yellow layers were so complicated.

I miss measured the paper size so the back of all four copies are a mess.

I made four copies, and every one had a different mystake. The one showed was the only one that the cat showed up on.

I fucked up carving alot, I just got good at covering it up.

The duck has no bill. I tried to make up for it by giving them an intentional halo, it didn't quite work.

The reeds are too short. This actually gives off a slightly more organic vibe than I was going for. I'm not quite sure if I like it.

One of the sun swirls is broken up a bit because my hand sliped.

The blue layer was off and ended up giving the volcano some highlight. It pops a little until you realize it's out of place, so I don't like it.

Printed red through black in one day, my entire arm hates me still. I had my entire arm tensed to prevent slip ups. It's not so bad right now because my mom told me which med to take today, but I couldn't sleep on that side or my back very well last night. At least I didn't break skin when I stabed myself! I need to lay off crocheting, but that's how I decompress...

I will repost with individual pictures of each copy and the drawing on Monday, that's when the crit is anyway.

What I would do differently

Smaller egg, let the corners interact with each other a bit.

I would play with the idea of white clouds, or white with black highlights.

I would make the sun swirls part of the red gradient. I would also simplify their shape to make them easier to carve.

I would look at different ways to portray the cat. Maybe I would play with the idea of red eyes on the cat. Red claws to represent violence? Cause I'm not going to ever go all in on a horrific portrayal, hints have to do for kitty.

Multi colored and more consistent pebble bed. Maybe mossy rocks or sand with grasses growing in? Seeds? Arthropods to pull in yet another creation myth?

Duck would have a bill and a halo or some sort. There plenty of methods to imitate and explore.

I would play with the idea of defining individual rock structure on the volcano and the small waterfall.

Gemstones on the volcano?

Maybe not even do a volcano, and just make a black dragon on a mountain? Chinese style to keep up with the theme of creation?

Shade the reeds in gradients, maybe make thin red lines to imitate their texture?

Dragonflies by the reeds?

Green layer to add moss and lichen, as well as springtime pigments for the reeds as opposed to fall, can you even marble shades effectively in print making? Green detailing on the cat would start getting Erie.

Yggdrasil roots in the division, multi color highlights on yellow, tiny branch coming around to poke out by the sun?

Grey to black gradient instead of straight black for the outline?

Use a digital painting software instead of actualy carving it all. That's the only way I will play with this image again.

The Finnish Godess of Creaton

Luonnotar

Once the universe was comprised of three things.

There was nothingness, a vast unmeasurable abyss where not even a single star shone. The power of stillness was held in the dark expanse.

There was a river, a mysterious flow of swirling posability. The power and movement of the universe was held in the 'waters'.

And lastly, there was a girl. Luonntar was the daughter of the stillness of the abyss and the power of movement. She was alone, and there was nothing for her to do, no way to express herself, or to release energy, or even just simply enrich her life. She did not know companionship, so she did not know to be lonely. She did not sleep, nor did she truly live. She only felt emptiness. There was no pain to be felt, nor was there joy to be had.

Something changed. Something tightened in Luonntar's chest, as though her heart was hurting. Over another eternity she came to recognize the pain as desire. Into her emptiness had flowed a blind longing. She wanted something but she did not know what there even was to want. She wanted change, but because she never experienced anything but the same river and the same darkness, she had no idea what it was she wanted.

Slowly (as everything so far had), an idea budded in Luonntar's mind, the first idea ever in the universe. She jumped into the river and swam. She did not sink, but floated on the surface, looking back up to the darkness she had left from. This action permanently altered the universe, though seeing how took some more time (of corse). In the meantime the girl relaxed as she drifted through the river.

Then came a duck ((grapes are not involved in this myth stahp)) swimming up to Luonntar. A duck, in a universe where there had only ever been one being, now there were two! With Luonntar's change and wish, she changed the entire universe and a new world was created in which the duck could exist too.

The curious bird swam around the girl looking at the strange other being, the girl laying very still as she did the same. The duck climbed up onto Luonntar's warm knee and sat. Then something else happened, something so beautiful that Luonntar could not believe her eyes.

The duck layed three eggs there upon the goddess' knee because it was the only warm dry place in the entire universe, and the only place the future could hatch.

Luonntar kept so very still, anxious of the fragile life prched upon her knee. The duck warmed her clutch as they grew hotter and hotter as the future drew near.

Luonntar yearned for that future like she had never yearned before, bringing back the dull pain from before. She ignored it.

The eggs grew uncomfortably hot, the ducks featherstickled her, and the bebed feet left tiny scratches on her. She ignored it all.

Suddenly the duck shifted, her feathers tickling Luonntar and she couldn't help but to twitch reflexively. She did not mean to but it was enough. She watched horrified as the eggs tumbled into the river. She berated herself, fearing for the eggs. Would they sink forever out of sight? Would the future be lost?

Instead the eggs broke open. Marvels poured forth. The yolks joined into the sun and rose up into the abyss. The whites became a silver moon, rising as well. The tiny bits of the shells became the stars, scattered disjointed with the rest of the remains of the three eggs. In a world where only darkness had existed, light was born. It was magic.

Luonntar was changed by the magic, as she dove beneath the surface. Something was calling to her from the depths. It was the mud at the bottom. She grabbed handfuls and swam back to the surface. She molded a cone from the mud upon her belly and placed it on the surface of the river. It rose into the sky and became a mountain.

She dived again and again, returning to the surface to mold more new landscapes. She carved veins of rivers through the land, scooping out lakes. The stars watched in fascination. Inspired, they rearranged themselves into designs. The moon learned out to show its changing face to the earth.

As Luonntar built the land, life burst forth. Plants grew, creatures came to be. All life was the children of the new earth. When the goddess rested at long last and looked at the bright sky, the green foliage, and the lively children, she knew it was good.

((Adlibed from "Wild Girls" by Patricia Monaghan))

[the-hermit-path]

Ritual, Routine, and Mental Illness

A note: Truthfully, I've been hesitant about sharing things like this here. My healing has been deeply personal and I know that recovery isn't one-size-fits-all, but I also feel that if any pieces of what have been effective for me can help others, then I'm compelled to open up and share them. And of course, if you have access to professional care in these matters, use it.

[ Image Description: A nightstand under a window with a potted plant in the foreground and a candle and lamp painted with roses in the background. End ID. ]

A dear friend and I were talking recently about ritual structure and the function of each aspect of ritual, and in the same conversation we also talked about my mental health and how I've structured my routine to give me a leg up on recovery, and having the two topics that close together showed me their similarities. I have my daily and weekly rituals, but I've begun thinking now about how my routine (which I've thought of as predominantly mundane) is itself a kind of ritual.

Beyond the obvious -- that rituals and routines are both a series of actions which are repeated -- my routine is like a ritual in the way it helps me make sense of and carry momentum throughout my day. In the mornings I record my dreams and take time in bed to let go of worries and start to wake up, like cleansing a space and grounding. My morning prayers are like creating sacred space around my day, setting intentions and petitioning the deities for their help and guidance like I might do at the start of a full moon rite. My day itself is the ritual action, tackling the tasks I set intentions for at the start, tasks and intentions designed to help me build myself up out of a lifetime of illness and disorder.  Throughout the day I check in with myself, staying centered the way I might in a ritual, keeping connected to a certain energy. At the end of my day I give thanks and wind down my brain, using meditation to calm me and ready me for sleep, mirroring the final offerings and closing of a ritual. Each day for me, then, is it's own kind of healing ritual.

This of course looks different for everyone and that's my point in sharing this. What is your day's structure? What are your routines? If you have yet to build some, what might they look like, and more importantly what do they mean to you? I've learned the hard way that real healing starts when you stop performing what you think it should look like and do the healing you're called to do. For some it may be early morning exercise, positive affirmations, cleansing spells in the shower and gratitude at meals. For others maybe your playlist on the way to work or school inspires you to be uplifted, perhaps even dedicated to a particular deity to help you feel close to them.

I'll also mention that I think purpose is often more important than the action itself. Some people wake up with the sun and go get active, which is a great way to regulate your circadian rhythm and get oxygen to your muscles and brain, waking up your mind and body, but it doesn't work for everybody. Personally, I need some restful time slowly waking up. My first hour is spent in bed letting my mind come into the new day, and in fact days where I have to roll out of bed and get going first thing often leave me disoriented and foggy. Try not to focus so much on what you're doing as what it's doing for you. Look at the routine you have in place already, even ordinary activities like brushing your teeth and getting dressed, and find ways to frame them within a purpose. Does the color you're wearing correspond to an intention you have? Does brushing your teeth energetically cleanse you of harmful words and negative self talk? Start from where you are and build your purpose and further routine into it.

Not to contradict myself, but the practice itself is important, too. Repetition builds into triggers and creates inertia, so if you light a candle every morning with a prayer and intention, but one morning you're running late and can't muster up your usual focus, take the thirty seconds to simply light the candle while you get dressed and get your things together. Once you've chosen your routine, stick to it. Give it six weeks. If it needs tweaks, make those changes and then do that for another six weeks. To call this process difficult is a massive understatement but the hardest part of it is also it's key to success, and that is that healing is slow. Invest in it and accept that it's going to happen in small increments over a long period of time. In truth, for many of us healing is a lifelong dedication. 

Routine is vital for those of us who struggle with our mental health. The momentum of having some structure already in place to get you through your day helps create and hold space for bigger projects and handling our rough patches. If you're lacking routine right now, make a list of things you feel would lend structure and stability to your day -- mindfulness, quiet time alone, focus and motivation -- and then find methods that work for you. Set timers on your phone to stop and breathe or meditate throughout the day. Leave post-it notes with affirmations on your bathroom mirror. Write a prayer to offer before bed each night. Again, the action itself isn't as important as the purpose it serves and how effective it is for you, so be creative and find your own coping mechanisms if the usual suggestions don't seem to connect.

I will note also that routine is about forming habits, which is difficult, and doubly so for those of us struggling. Start small and be forgiving with yourself. Perhaps begin by curbing negative habits into healthier ones. If you're prone to pick up your phone in the morning and scroll social media, maybe course-correct to reading articles about your interests or personal growth, doing a guided meditation, or sending positive good morning texts to a friend. Most importantly, value consistency over perfection. If you miss a day or need to adjust your routine to accommodate, don't let yourself create a narrative of failure. Keep trying, keep going, and if at first all you can manage is one small act a day, then do it. There is no such thing as a small change. Everything counts, it all adds up. Your illness is not a reflection of you and your worth but a challenge to cope with and overcome. Look at how you reinforce harmful narratives and habits and crowd them out with things and thoughts that are better for your wellbeing. This looks different for everyone, trust and be honest with yourself about what you need to change and then break it down and begin making those changes a little piece at a time. Don't set deadlines on a certain ideal of progress, either, especially at first. Think of new habits as an experiment, a curiosity about what you can do and seeing how a new perspective through routine can teach you something or help you develop better ways of coping. If you need some more inspiration about where to start, @the-diary-of-a-failure has a really great outline here. 

Think of your days as ritual and focus on their beginnings and endings, creating and releasing sacred space around your life. They don't need to have direct spiritual meanings, but frame them in a way that lends you the sort of perspective you need to prioritize and focus on the things that help you get by. Forgive yourself when you fail and learn from what doesn't work. Celebrate when you find what works and let it guide you towards the type of energy you need.  For those of us with mental illness, it's hard to even find enough worth in ourselves to put energy into our healing, but it takes sacrifice to create the sacred. Sacrifice what time, focus, and energy you have towards your wellbeing and let it consecrate the healing process, shifting your perspective of recovery into a sacred task.

Ritual is how we communicate both to the greater Universe and to our subconscious selves. By creating a perspective of ritual into our daily routines, we can make our lives themselves a ritual, and thus a conversation with existence and how we want to reside within it as a whole.

Be safe out there, moonbeams.🖤🔮🌘

🚫 do not interact: transphobes, homophobes, or racists 🚫

[psylynt-p]

Wednesday, February 16th, 2022

7:09 a.m.

Here to write about this past dream. Was awesome! Super interesting.

First thing I remember is being in a tent of hard plastic, slightly trapezoid-shaped. It was dark inside, with a tiny bit of light filtering in through the edges of the doorflap. I felt weird like I kind of couldn't breathe so I got up to go outside. When I opened the flap I saw a black sky filled with stars, and it all looked so much different than the sky ever has; felt smaller. there was a bright light off to the right, in the sky, and when I turned to look I could see it was somehow the sun. Also looked way different. There were other tents nearby, the ground was a brickish red, all sand with some rocks randomly about. It didn't get easier to breathe and then I saw a man come out of a tent to the right. He smiled at me and started walking over to talk, when suddenly there were brilliant streaks of light directly above us that turned out to be asteroids crashing on the surface of whatever planet this was(had a gut-feeling we were on the moon but it didn't make sense to me how we could breathe freely). I looked in the direction they were coming in from and saw a bunch more, some even seemingly at eye-level and yeah, started having to dodge some. Man with me started running around too, to avoid being obliterated by the crashing asteroids. Off to our left appeared a giant pyramid looked carved from a single stone, gray with marks in it like pocks? Had a large corridor cut in the middle, where we ran to for shelter. As we were running inside, others followed directly after. Once inside, seemed the scene abruptly changed, and we were then in a big library. It was filled with many books all looking normal, like books one would expect to find in a small university library, only thing weird was the foreign language printed on their covers. The group I was with was also confused by the books, all started looking through them to help make sense, try to figure the strange language out, or something... I came across a book with a kind of web-design on the cover, gave me vibes like it was a map book. I opened it up and saw drawings like a map of mountainous area next to a sea, with buildings drawn in it making it seem like a small town, rows of buildings of different sizes, one very large and long which felt like it could be the one we were in, that library. Showed it to the group then wandered outside and great, no more pyramid, no tents, no sandy rocks or anything like where we were behavior. Even the sky had changed, now the regular blue I'm used to, no longer dark as it had turned day, apparently. The place we were in was the one drawn in the map book, looking like an old English city, houses of brick and wood frame. Was a river right before us, a bridge to the left, and people across the way who saw us, began smiling and waving and then walking towards us. They looked Peruvian, mostly women, small and brown wearing traditional dress with those fancy hats. We meet them at the end of the bridge on our side and just listened to them go off excitedly about what we couldn't understand.

I don't remember much more past that, only traces of encountering wildlife, large lizards with what looked like leaves on the ends of their points(tails, elbows and such). Also remember another dream part much more mundane of me getting out a car with my family in it to buy my dad some scratch-offs in a gas station we'd just parked outside of. Ladies working the register really liked me, and so did the customers, though I recognized none of them and it seemed I was a stranger to them as well, they were all just really friendly.

Dream a major one, first like it I've had in forever, crazy real, defined, and lengthy. I'll prob stay thinking of it all day today at work, as much as I don't forget.

[thesoujishow]

S01E02 - Raimei Tsubusu

[vaporwave lo-fi song]

Souji: Testing? Hello?

Raimei: WUUUUSSSSHHGFGSHSHSHSHSHSHSHS...SSHAAAAAAAA....

Souji: Ok. There we go.

[INTRO - glitchy transition music]

Souji: Hello, and welcome to the Souji Show. I'm Souji and this is a show where I talk about anything I want. 'Cause this is my show, and not yours.

Souji: This episode is sponsored by WcDonalds! WcDonald’s wants to remind you that the most important meal of the day is breakfast. [ominously] So why would you let a morning go by without staring deeply into the mirror until you no longer recognize the face staring back at you – mimicking your every gesture, mocking your every movement?

Souji: [confused + ominous] How else will you get the energy you need for a full day’s work or recreation if you aren’t silently screaming into the visage of a person who gives you such uneasy spirit, such unshakable terror, a queasy feeling every time you make the connection between what that thing is and what you are becoming? What you have become? Where does the void end? Where do you end? When do you end? What time is it now? You’ve been crying, but for how long?

Souji: [cheerful] WcDonald’s! I’m lovin’ it.

[MAIN - glitchy transition music]

Souji: For this very special episode, we have an extra special guest. You may know her as the Violet Vendetta or the captain of the baseball clan. Everyone, give it up for Raimei Tsubusu! You look fantastic today, can you tell our listeners what you're wearing?

Raimei: My sincere apologies for the white noise that was the sound of a closing inter-dimensional portal.

Raimei: It's good to be here. And a great sacrifice on your part, Souji. Not a lot of men would have the guts to expose themselves to this level of danger. As for my attire, these are unique garbs crafted by the Lunarian Moon People, forged in the pits of the thirty-second moon crater. They have plus fifty resilience to all forms of stabbing, cutting and elemental weapons, and the shirt comes with the added benefit of granting me the unique ability: Instantaneous Gangstah Charm. With this ability, I can instantaneously cast any Gokudō spell written within the Book of Yamaguchi.

Souji: Gokudō, that's a synonym for the yakuza, right?

Raimei: Yes, it is. It means the Extreme Path, the hidden school of mysticism I and others subscribe to—one of the five routes to enlightenment, alongside the Mafioso talent tree, and Mexican Cartel Member.

Raimei: In terms of appearance, I had the most excellent designers from Gucci collaborate with the moon people to compress it all down into a pair of pearl white trousers, a tuxedo jacket, white dress shirt, and leather shoes. The Gucci Glasses of Information allow me to see in infra-red and night vision, and I've also got a watch made of platinum that tells me the timezones of all the countries on the world, the moon people's time cycle, and of course, it also dual functions as a holographic mind reader.

Raimei: Some people believe Prada is better. They are wrong.

Souji: I'm more of a thrift store kinda guy, but to each their own. I'll have to get some tips from the Lunarian Moon People on how they make clothes. Most of my clothes are custom made for my Quirk to work on them so I like to sew them myself. Does your inter-dimensional portal go to the moon as well?

Raimei: I lived in this dimension for almost three hundred years before I finally managed to make my first slip into the dream-zone, and that was nearly one hundred years ago. It isn't precisely possible to take a direct, inter-dimensional portal to the moon itself. But it is possible to reach the mirror version of it in the ninth dimension. In that dimension, the moon's where the earth is. So that solves a lot of things. Has to do with the Lunarian's Mystic Mirror view. As you probably already know, portals like these are dependent on reflections. So their mirrors make that impossible by reflecting everything back onto the earth. That's why the moon looks white. It's actually a verdant landscape, filled with grass and trees and everything. But it seems like a rock because we're just looking at a dull reflection of our own planet.

Souji: That's a very unique way to look at the moon. Shoutout to the huge unknown object that smacked the shit out of the Earth billions of years ago and gave us the moon. The sun is cool but that was the real MVP.

Souji: I gotta say, you do look very gangstah. Not to mention a holographic mind reader? Quick, what am I thinking of right now? [laugh]

Raimei: I'm... not sure if that would be appropriate for me to say. Last time I mind read a guy... didn't end well. Besides, this holographic watch would also immediately turn it into a visualization, which can be very embarrassing. So I'll spare you that. But maybe I'll show you a glimpse of my power at the end of this podcast. Sounds good?

Souji: Sounds good. Guess the listeners will just have to stay tuned and find out. Tell me Raimei, how does a multi-dimensional creature end up in Kyoranki Academy? What motivates you to become a hero?

Raimei: That's a good one. There are several reasons. I've lived for about four hundred years in total, so technically speaking, there's no reason for me to go to school. But you might've noticed that there's an expansive underground movement hidden beneath the shadows... the recent events were just one example of that. The CIA, FBI, Interpol, Europol, they're all part of it in some way, preparing for the inevitable Todeskrieg Event. All the major crime groups are getting ready for that, so we are too.

Raimei: On a different level, related to my current incarnation, I'm not unfamiliar with thrift stores either. My dad works long hours... so I want to find a way to help him. I don't know, it's not really black or white. But why Kyoranki Academy? It's one of the best schools in the country. A lot of my middle school friends didn't even get to go to high school. So I consider myself very privileged. I think that alone is motivation enough to be here.

Souji: I get what you mean about helping your family. I think that's a noble cause, Raimei. I grew up poor and mum and dad were mostly out making ends meet. The money's still my number one motivator but it makes me happy knowing that I'll make the city a little bit better for everyone living in it.

Souji: I'm excited that we finally get to go on missions. It makes you think how much far we’ve come. It’s been a crazy year and now we’re actually doing our part to be heroes. I don’t know about you but I’m excited to take down my first villain.

Raimei: I'm concerned people are going to be misinterpreting their roles in this entire thing. Based on what you said earlier, you're from a poor neighbourhood as well, right? So you know what it's like on the streets. What I'm just concerned by is that a lot of the people in our class, like, ... I watch them. I see that the majority don't have that. They don't have any street smarts, they don't know what it's like to be in that situation, to be poor... to be under the influence of junkies across the street. Yea, we've been trained, but I'm unconvinced that we've been prepared to deal with those situations.

Raimei: I think we can take down villains, sure. And there might even be a few out there we could stop. But I'm not excited about running into one; nothing is exciting about meeting someone that potentially wants to kill you. And I'm not sure we're helping the city by pushing our authority down people's throats, especially by a bunch of teenagers that have been told this is their big shot at heroism. Your local twelve-year-old marijuana seller doesn't need juvie, they need role models; good, role models that can inspire them—structural improvements to their lives, like decent food.

Raimei: You know how crazy it is that I can buy five fast-food hamburgers for the price of one piece of supermarket vegetable? If people wanna help the neighbourhood; go help out at a shelter—a soup kitchen. Hand out food; give your homeless newspaper salesman some cash to get him through the day. Japanese society is harsh, man. The second you fall out of the boat, your chances are pretty much zero. Everyone despises you. Your family ousts you. It's not fun. I know it, I've seen it in friends; how they're getting torn apart just because they're like, half-Chinese or something.

Raimei: I hope our peers just remember that when they're going out. If you're going in there guns blazing, you're just going to hurt more people than you'll save.

Souji: I get what you mean. I grew up in the middle of downtown Osaka, nothing but skyscrapers. Our high rise apartment was small, but it kept us safe from the streets. The news spoke of heroes that roamed the streets, shutting down crime wherever they went. People spoke of bright, shining icons in colourful suits, flashing cheesy grins at the camera. But only a few came to ours.

Souji: Growing up in the poor meant that at a young age, I was very cognizant of how the money would and could limit me and my life as I attempted to get to the place where I am supposed to be. Most people our age will never know about ketchup sandwiches, adding water to milk or to an empty shampoo bottle to get more shampoo. Hand-me-downs clothes, books, toys. Having a ‘candle day’ because the lights don’t work. [chuckle]

Souji: When I say to people I know downtown Osaka like it's the back of my hand, I really do mean it. I know which places to avoid during certain times of the day. You had to be street smart to survive, those are the rules of the game.

Raimei: Mhm, mhm. That's what I'm saying. I'm from the outskirts of Airin-chiku, so it's pretty much the same issue.

Souji: It's easy to get caught up in the title. A hero. Believe me, I'll admit that fame is enticing but at the end of the day, we're here to protect the whole city. Trust is a fragile thing. I think most of us in Kyoranki know that because of what happened. Villains and heroes are two sides of the same coin. We're both them in nature. Both are corrupted by the noble illusion of spreading ideas and helping others who on the 'good' side defined by them respectively. It's always been the human struggle in defining 'help' more importantly 'the others'. I don't know if I'm making sense but that's how I feel. [chuckle]

Raimei: And there's a couple of areas in between that too, mind. Not everyone's a bad guy, and not everyone's a good guy like the heroes that just pander for attention or the bad guys that are in it to support their families financially.

Souji: This Todeskrieg Event sounds interesting, what's going to happen?

Raimei: The Egyptian Pyramids. The moon landings. Global warming. Why did they happen? Did they happen? Or were these just small glimpses out of a much larger conspiracy? Why dedicate millions, tens of millions of dollars only to put a guy on the moon?

Raimei: The various gangs around the world know the answer. At least, the established ones. It's all a part of this cybernetic A.I that has kept us trapped in a virtual reality dimension, Souji. You think all of this is real, but like, do we have any proof? How can we reliably say that this isn't just...computer generated?

Souji: I'm a big arcade, video game fan so this is right up my alley. I had the same hunch as you, Raimei. The truth is that there’s much we simply don’t understand about our reality, and I think it’s more likely than not that we are in some kind of a simulated universe. Now, it’s a much more sophisticated video game than the games we produce, just like today World of Warcraft and Fortnite is way more sophisticated than Pac-Man or Space Invaders. If we develop the ability to produce even one simulated reality, we will almost certainly produce more than one.

Raimei: That's what confuses people. They think I'm going on about some sort of magical thing. But magic and science are one and the same, magic's just another way of trying to add rationality to it. And that's part of the Todeskrieg event. It's French for "Totem Pole Disaster"... it's written about in various religions. Some call it the Apocalypse, others Ragnarok ... basically the end of the world. When the simulation will be using too much data for the computer to handle.

Souji: Maybe we're just figment of imaginations and our creators are just forcing their every whim to us for fun. They're our writers, and we are their characters. Maybe they're just a bunch of roleplayers in a Discord server together? Do you hear that creator? I'm The Glitch now, a bug in your system. A disruption to the simulation.

Raimei: Based on archaeological data, humans, in our current shape and form... have existed for about two-hundred thousand years. Now, of course, imagine you're a person living in those sorts of environments. Yes, you'll be stuck most of the day, collecting food and whatever. But do you think those people were dumber than us? Of course not! They might've not had the schooling, but they had the same type of brain.

Raimei: Now, imagine that sort of situation. Okay, so, the first generation of Humans... they got it hard. The second one does as well. The third generation, well, it's a bit easier. And the fourth one... we're talking about everything within the span of a hundred years, considering people lived shorter lives.

Raimei: Now multiply that by a hundred. One hundred thousand years and they're trying to convince us that people only invented farming techniques twelve thousand years ago? It doesn't make sense. You can't convince me, people, before that time didn't... invent something. Didn't create something. Didn't create a civilization. Imagine, with our technology, with our A.I systems, our virtual reality capacities... I mean, if you're into gaming, look at the last fifty years.

Raimei: Now multiply that by four. Imagine just how bizarre that technology would be. Already, we've got games that are borderline lifelike. So how can we know that this isn't just.. some giant simulation? We can't. And we have to look at the empirical, most logical type of data. There's more evidence to suggest all of this is just a program than there is evidence to the contrary. But scientists aren't willing to recognize that.

Souji: I know! I can't believe no one is talking about this. Paranormal events like hauntings or alien encounters can be glitches in the simulation. Stuff like the Mandela Effect is supposedly proof that whoever is in charge of our simulation is changing the past. And don't get me started on Quirks! Superpowers born from radiation. You’re not going to get proof that we’re not in a simulation, because any evidence that we get could be simulated. If I were a character in a computer game, I would also discover eventually that the rules of our universe seem completely rigid and mathematical.

Souji: We’ve spent billions sending probes through outer space and should probably have found evidence of extraterrestrials by now, right? Not so fast: Aliens would likely be far more technologically advanced than we are, the thinking goes, so the fact that we haven’t located them suggests we live in a simulation they’ve figured out how to escape from. Or maybe the computer we’re in only has enough RAM to simulate one planetary civilization at a time?

Raimei: That's what we've been preparing for. The drug trade, the crime cartels, it all has to do with that.

[ASK SOUJI - glitchy transition music]

Souji: Now, let's shine the spotlight back towards the main focus of his podcast... me! Now, Raimei, it's your turn to ask me questions. C'mon, don't be shy, ask anything you'd like.

Raimei: are you sure you want to give me that sort of power? Because if I get to ask anything I like... First up, what's the deal with you and Ken? I don't want to pry into your love life, but you two looked very cosy in that meeting room.

Souji: Me and Ken? Love life? Oh, umm. I mean, umm. No, we aren't. You know. Together like that. [stammering]

Souji: We're just rivals! Yes, rivals. We started talking over the summer and we got closer during the campfire trip. Bunk buddies. Yeah, that. No love life here.

Raimei: Uh-huh. ... Bunk buddies. Well, if that's the official answer...

Souji: ...yes! Bunk buddies. That's the official answer.

Raimei: And I guess, another question is... why did you start this podcast? I'm not exactly famous or especially well-liked around the school, so I'm wondering why you're inviting someone like me to do this sort of thing.

Souji: I started this podcast because of Starlight. He's my favourite hero as you can probably tell. I always watched his talk show growing up, and it was what inspired me to enrol in Kyoranki in the first place. So this podcast is me passing it forward. I want to inspire other kids just like what Starlight did to me. One interview at the time.

Raimei: That's good. That you got a role model to follow, I mean... that you know what you want to do, and who ya wish to emulate. It's the same thing with the guys I mentioned earlier. ... Don't have plushies of them though, unfortunately.

Souji: You say the weirdest stuff in our group chat and I like it! You're interesting, zany and fun. You have a unique point of view, and having you in my show is an honour in it of itself.

Raimei: And I appreciate that about inviting me on your show I mean. Glad I could mention those frustrations I've been holding up. Don't have to go out of your way for me though, I'm okay with sticking to my own little bubble. That's just the life of a made-man. Forever in the shadows.

[Qs from the GC - glitchy transition music]

Souji: Let's move on to our audience questions! These were submitted by our classmates in our group chat. Ready?

Raimei: Yea, audience questions. I'm honestly surprised anyone finds me interesting enough to ask questions, but okay, let's go

Souji: Chia wants to know who are the special people in your life? What's something you're proud of and embarrassed by?

Raimei: Special people, huh? Well, I've got my dad. My mom ran out on us when I was little, so it has always been us versus the world. I've been going to a gym now for about... five years? And the people there are my role models, I guess. They inspired me to get into sports, like boxing. One in particular... the guy's a genuine sumo wrestler. But of the old generation? But yea, those guys have made a significant impact on me.

Souji: Haruto asks, why is your skin purple? Likewise, Ao inquires, do you know the girl who turned into a blueberry in Wonka's factory?

Raimei: As for my skin colour, ... I guess I've gotten a bit desensitized to questions like that. It's a skin mutation on my mother's side, supposedly to do with Quirks. I don't know, I always find it a bit weird to talk about. That nickname they gave me too, it's like calling someone with a darker skin pigmentation the "Black Vendetta". I mean, not that I mind. Asking about the pigmentation's no problem because it's odd. I'm just saying, it feels a bit shitty to compare me with some fucking Willy Wonka scene when like six months ago a kid got bullied out of school because people kept comparing him to a video game character; so, uh, Ao, you're cool. No hard feelings. I'm just going to subtly compare you to a fucking Star Wars Droid if you try that shit again.

Souji: Ken wants to know what you think of the recent baseball team tryout. And to that I say: we have a baseball team? Can I also try out just to beat that monkey boy?

Raimei: Yea, we got a baseball team! I mean, we got teams for nearly every popular sport, right? It's a prestigious school, after all. But we're doing our best to try for the nationals. And you're welcome to join up if you want, we can definitely use a few more clan members. As for our most recent try-out... that all depends on whether he joins up or not.

Souji: Kotoe inquires, do you play the bass?

Raimei: I don't play the bass or any other instrument.

Souji: And finally, Fumi wants to know your favourite genre of book.

Raimei: My favourite genre of books is crime novels.

[ENDING - glitchy transition music]

Souji: Well, we're nearing the end of our show, Raimei, is there anything you'd like to remind our audience, maybe plug whenever they can find you online? Maybe some tips on how to prepare for the Todeskrieg Event?

Raimei: I had an excellent time Souji. Thanks for inviting me. As for preparations, the people can make for the Todeskrieg Event, consider this a bit of an unofficial announcement; we are in fact a highly secretive group. But we, that being me and a few other highly skilled individuals steeped knee-deep in the criminal underground, decided to create a sparring group a few months ago. A fighting ring, as it were.

Raimei: There's no real focus on anything other than fighting a lot, gaining that sort of experience. I don't really bother with rankings or who's best or whatever either, I mean, my choice to just not participate in that tournament should prove of that. So there's no ego thing going on. Whether ya win or lose, it's all good. It's like a clan...But our meetings are sorta irregular, so you can still be part of another, like how I'm still in the baseball clan.

Raimei: As for the best way to contact me, all the usual underground channels work.

Souji: You've been pretty cool to talk to, so before you leave, I have a special surprise just for you. But don't forget, you promised to show me a glimpse of your power.

Raimei: And I did promise to show you a sample of my hidden, mystical power, didn't I? Alright- I'll try and make sure to contain it so that we don't blow up this entire office.

[sounds of moving chairs]

[sound of an 80s disco beat from silly cartoons transformation scenes]

Raimei: Ultra-Mobster, transformation! Percentage; three hundred!

Raimei: Yamaguchi-Gumi spell; Fifty-Five! Gokudō code, page three. Entering heat mode. Specialized skill; DISROBE.

[sounds of thunder]

Raimei: Looks like I got a new favourite shirt. Thanks, Glitch.

Souji: What a way to end the show! [applause]

Souji: Well listeners, if the world does turn out to be just a simulation, remember to make the most of it. Make a point of seeing some good in every day. Drop your resentments. We all have them. Make every day count. The end of the world is coming but until then, to keep up with the show follow me @thesoujishow, and to support my small clothing business, follow @glitchgear on all social media platforms. Once again, this has been Raimei Tsubusu and Souji Yoshihiro, and you’ve been listening to the Souji Show! A show where I talk about anything I want. 'Cause this is my show, and not yours. Until next time. Insert catchphrase here.

[vaporwave lo-fi song]

[EXTRAS - glitchy transition music]

Souji: If you listen to this podcast, chances are you go to Kyoranki Academy. Kido Kotoe is looking for a bass player for her band. So if any of you are interested, please contact her at [Kotoe's school email].