#Also: the fact you're not feeling yourself rn and decided to make someone else's day make you the best kind of person.

[the-s1lly-corner]

Hi. Can I request something similar to the immortals outliving you? Could it be with the rest of the characters and us passing from other causes?

Their reactions to losing you

I wasnt sure if you wanted the immortals as well, so I added them in here as well!

This is all written in one go since tumblr doesnt let me save drafts for asks so I apologize for any spelling/grammar mistakes <\3 it's like 1am rn

CONTENT WARNINGS, idk what all needs a warning but I'd rather play it VERY safe:

M*rder

M*rder revenge, almost all of them touch on it tbh, love me the revenge trope

Snorts^

D3ath, obviously

Grief and the general hurt that comes with it

In EJs case he sees your death first hand

Does violently slamming yourself around count as SH /genq, because if so that's vagued in EJs part as well

Maskys handles a hit and run but its vague

Masky also hints to a smoking addiction

Nonspecific illness in hoodies part

Slenderman;

I remember that I mentioned this for Slendermans part, but I had an idea that he already accepted that fact that you wouldn't last forever

But I don't remember if I mentioned/vagued the idea of how he'd react to you're life being forcibly cut short

Accepting the fact you'll eventually pass away does nothing when he finds out someone else was responsible for your sudden end

All that comes out is a cold rage, something that the creature hasn't experienced in a long time

Writing this, it makes me remember that clip from the first episode of castlevania where dracula appears in the fire in episode one, after they kill his wife

But instead of carelessly showing himself to the world in a fit of rage, he fiercely protects everything that you touched; his forest, your home, your grave, ect

But despite the rage he doesnt immediately take down the person who caused this

Nonono, he does what he does best; he chips away at the person's mind through stalking and paranoia, essentially tormenting them for.. god knows how long until he gets bored

When he does decide hes through with them he'll make sure their... death... is drawn out

Basically don't meddle in the life of a forest monster; he may be a very... passionate.. lover

Splendorman;

Incredibly similar to the other version of this post where he naturally outlives you

But if you pass unnaturally, he'd be even more torn up about it

His time with you was already going to be short to begin with, but it was cut down even shorter

Doesnt matter the cause; murder, illness, accident, ect.. he'll be just as broken up

There's no real significant changes; he still mourns and honors you the same way for the most part

Laughing Jack;

It was an accident; one day you were there and the next, gone

He would stay in the house for a few days, not even knowing what was going on

At first he'd be worried and confused, before those feelings would deepen into something debilitating

He'd probably eventually find out through the news, after turning on the tv to pass the time and fill the silence

His worry immediately morphs into ice cold; he could feel his heart drop

He'd throw caution to the wind and try to track down whoever did he

He doesnt care if it was an accident, he wants justice and compensation

He follows a similar route as slenderman; the only thing is, is that jack lacks the patience to draw it out

After everything is said and done he's beside himself; avenging you didnt bring him back and it hardly made him feel better

He likely just. Goes back to what he was doing before he met you; drifting from house to house and causing havoc; but now he carries a melancholic aura

Eyeless Jack;

Another story of revenge, but with a twist so his part isnt too similar to LJ and slenders

So I'll be using the idea I should've given slenderman (but I'm too stubborn to rewrite his part)

Like Slenderman, Jack is seen as a cryptid and thus, there are naturally going to be people trying to hunt him down. Especially considering before he was a cursed monster he was a normal dude who got caught up in a whole... thing... and who's body was obviously never found as it still walks

Jack is.. semi used to that; but one day he completely catches him off guard, and what's worse is that you were there when it happened

It was a group, too, usually they come in two; but there were more that day. If it were less Jack could have easily put a stop to it all

It escalated

You had tried to step in to help him, to buy him some time so he could run; but it all went wrong

I don't like going into detail about this kind of thing, so this will be up to interpretation

The whole thing flings him into a rage and he makes quick work of the remaining hunters, but it's all too late

Even if he wasn't, how could he help? He cant just leave the woods and dump you at a hospital... but he doesnt have the supplies to help you then and there... and even if he did you were both much too far away from the cabin

It just leaves him helplessly trying to stop the bleeding

He hardly ever leaves the woods after that; not even to eat

He's resorted to.. rather violently subduing the monstrous side of him that craves flesh

There's broken furniture everywhere

He blames himself

He should have had you stay in the cabin

He should have told you to run

He should have told you to hide

He should've...

The worst thing is that he begins to believe that it was his fault; afterall he let you out of his sight when he began fighting. Even worse, and perhaps stupidly, he believed this wouldn't have happened if he never met you

Its

Rough

Masky;

He just sits there, quietly

Be it shock or something else he just sits there

But his mind is going a mile a minute to try to figure out what exactly happened to you

You were.. in a wreck, and the other person just. Fled.

As feral as I tend to write and interpret masky, he can be thorough when it comes to investigating

Though I'm torn in whether or not he'd actually be able to find the person; especially because I'm kinda. Dumb when it comes to crime stuff and I'm not about to do mental gymnastics on something I'm not confident in <\3

In terms of grief, he seems... lost...

I don't usually hc that Masky smokes; that's just a Tim thing

But I feel like the smoking would bleed into Masky and become a whole... issue.. whether or not Tim as his own person knows about you/was involved with you is up to interpretation; as I tend to write the proxies as a separate.. thing

Still trying to find the correct term

But yeah

Focusing back in on Masky, he's kinda just lost. Angry, definitely, but mostly just. Wandering through life

He doesn't want to forget you

Hoodie;

Similar to Masky he's quiet and lost

Similarly he would feel the urge to try to find out who took you away; but I feel we've had enough "S/o dies at the hands of someone else" for this post, so we'll do something else... and because I fear hoodies portion will be too similar to maskys

You got sick, to put it simply

It's.. odd..

He's well aware that you're deteriorating, and he's aware that time is running out

But he can't help but feel calm in your presence; its only when you're apart that he feels that dread, and its constant

Maybe it's the fact that when he's with you he can easily convince himself that, in that moment, you're alright

It hurts when it finally happens

Out of all the guys, he's probably the most normal(?) About the situation

He visits your grave, a lot of the time, leaves little gifts there

He doesn't talk much, but he probably talks to you

Likely keeps something on him to remember you, like a locket or something

[jabeur]

specifically for suggesting that they check the faq/guideline, usually if i am directing someone to another source rather than trying to help them myself, i pose it as a suggestion, like "you could try checking the faq, i think that might help you out!" or "have you taken a look at the guideline? you should be able to find some help there!"

even though i still feel guilty for saying no, this feels a bit safer to me because i'm proposing an option rather than telling them explicitly what to do (though there is nothing wrong with that either, i just find it harder). and this way, if they really need my direct help, it sort of leaves the door open for them to ask again if they can't figure it out.

you could also give timeline along with it, like "i can't help right now, but if you're still suck in 15 minutes, i might be able to!" depending on the task, some people might be able to either figure it out in that time or find someone else to help them!

idk exactly what people are asking you to help them with so i don't know how helpful any of this is, but yeah, i would say usually what helps me the most with getting better at saying no is trying to redirect people rather than outright refusing. i think outright refusing is also a good skill to develop, but unfortunately it's mostly a matter of "training" yourself to do it (practice practice practice). but there are sort of "in-between" steps that you can take that will still allow you achieve your goals without having to always push yourself to say no directly.

anyways, sorry for talking so much, i hope there's at least some part of this that is useful, and if not then i hope someone else is able to help you!! <3

hi anon, sorry i took so long to answer this, been a rough timee.. but i wanted to say that this was in fact helpful! i've slowly been trying to use the tactics/advice you and other people shared with me-

(and little intermission. taking this opportunity to say sorry to everyone who dmed me with advice on this that i never replied to: you were all very helpful and kind and i appreciate your help so so much; conversations are just hard lately)

-and i think it will take a while to practice and get better at handling this kind of thing but i feel like i'm starting at least. rn i'm especially trying to follow your advice of saying i can't right now, i'll get to you later. not exactly like you said bc i still feel bad going "i'll be able to help in 15 minutes if you're still stuck" bc in my mind it feels like telling them "try to solve it on your own". which like.. as someone else pointed out in dms (and as our coordinators at work say too) it's not even a bad thing to do bc it actually helps to try and solve problems on your own as much as possible, it's a useful skill to practice (i have too, i didn't just Know How to Do and Handle Things from day 1) so i should start seeing it more as also doing them a favor? bc hey our coordinators really appreciate when we take initiative and responsibility and just make a choice. even if sometimes it's not a good one, if you put some thought into it and decided a course of action on your own, with the knowledge you do have (bc we aren't given tasks we don't know how to do - or when we are, then it's different bc there's a process of being introduced to and explained the task by someone who knows how to do it well and that's a time when it IS encouraged you ask questions to that someone) and the skills you've developed so far, that's always a point in your favor. but eh in my mind it still feels like i'm gonna make them feel bad and like they can't ask me questions in the future (which isn't what i want). baby steps i guess, i've still been trying to say "give me 5 minutes, 10 minutes, i'll come to you when i've got the time" stuff like that. i guess in some way the fact i had a huge mental break down has "helped" by kinda forcing me to do this. like, especially last week i had moments where i just could not listen to people's questions and requests for help/advice bc i was doing really badly and had to fully focus on my tasks. so i did say "sorry, i can't right now" and well in those cases they could probably clearly see i wasn't well so even with little explanation they got the message but it did still kickstart the process lmao

but yeah sorry i talked a lot. point is i'm taking in all of your advice, anon and everyone else, and trying to practice and find the best ways for me to handle this issue

[saturnsorbits]

SATURN!!! my darling!!! idk how to express myself rn i maybe had like 8 shots at the bar tpnight LOL BUT i just wanted to tell you (without sounding creepy i hope!!!😭) how much i appreciate n love your presence here!!! maybe bc i havent been the best myself recently and im in bed n DEEP in my feels rn, but i felt like sending you some love to hopefully MAYBE cheer u up a bit!!! i think ur a wonderful author n one of the kindest people ive ever interacted with truly, n i loooooove to read ur reviews as much as the fic itself, your writing is SOOo captivating dear, whatever u write is v v v impactful and IMMERSIVE TOO!!! im always thinking about your fics long after ive read them bc your stories are just!!!!, the way ur story lines flow AND u make me feel so many!!! EMOTIONS!!!....omg **chefs kiss** your writing skills r PHENOMENAL, i always get so invested into the story ALSO i forgot to mention, they feel so NATURAL ALWAYS like it flows so well and feels so realistic but at the same time its like,,,sophisticated?? developed?? if that makes sense?? idk if it does im sorry im not good w words rn but I can always tell when reading ur works that this is like an experienced n skilled writer who knows their shit LOL, i hang onto every word and i feel like thats ur writing trademark to me, and its delightful that i always find myself enjoying ur fics for characters i dont even like or read about <3

and also as someone who doesnt always get the meanings behind stuff easily i rlly rrly appreciate ur analyses/fic reviews soooo much because its like a whole new world has been opened up to me and i see the story in a whole new light and its exciting bc its like reading it all over again!!! i love that so much so thank u beloved AAAND I LOVE U LOTS SATURNS THANK U FOR BEING HERE N GOODNIGHT!!!

Okay, so I've been staring at this for the last several hours, because: Holy shit Anon, who told you you could be so sweet to me? 😭

I'm sobbing. Thank you, honestly, from the bottom of my heart. Hearing how much you enjoy my writing made me squeal like a little school girl! My reviews, too - any time someone calls them a review I get a little head-rush, I know it sounds silly, but that in itself is such a compliment. Writing those little comments on other people's work is one of my favourite things to do here, and knowing that people really like reading them makes me feel all kinds of fuzzy inside.

You really made my entire week with this little message...

I hope you had a good night, Anon and that things get a little better for you. Thank you, for being here, for reading and being a part of this little community. 💕

[sunshinemunchkin]

Maybe comforting George bcs sometimes he feels like everyone prefers Fred over him or they think that he's funnier than him,,, /?

you probably dont care but im on my period rn jsmdjs so im in like an angsty mood if that makes any sense lolol

Put You First

pairing: George Weasley x Reader

summary: george is feeling inferior to fred. you, being his best friend, comfort him and push his insecurities away.

warnings: crying, self-pity, insecurities, kissing.

word count: 711

a/n: lmao i feel that <3 i care a lot! drink some tea and eat some chocolate for me babes :) this is also kinda rushed so sorry if it's not the best :/

>>>>

you hadn't missed how your best friend slunk against the wall whenever someone was talking more to his twin brother, fred, than him. or how his smile dropped in the slightest whenever someone asked about his brother.

your heart broke for george, even more so considering you were and always had been in love with him.

so when you stopped by his dorm the next day to drop off some ideas for new items for his growing shop, you decided enough was enough at the sound of his pitiful sniffles.

knocking softly on the door, you open it when you don't hear an answer, revealing george with his face stuffed in his pillow.

"georgie?" the man sat up at the sound of your voice, ashamed of having been caught in this low state.

"hey, y/n. what's up?" taking tentative steps towards george, your smile turned soft.

"george." you started, sitting next to him on the bed and taking his hand in yours. a motion that was so fluid to the both of you.

"it's just me. you don't have to hide your emotions." a small blush creeped onto george's face, his eyes refusing to meet yours.

"it's foolish." he mumbled, earning a squeeze to his hand from you.

"i'll bet it's not. and that you're just making it seem that way. your feelings are valid, georgie." he nodded, taking your words into account before sighing deeply.

"i just feel so left out. everyone always seems to like fred more. i can't say that blame them though, he is more charming, and funny, and-." cutting him off with a hand that cupped his cheek, forcing his glassy eyes to look at yours.

you stared at george, feeling every emotion he was enduring. you allowed for your love for him to pour through your soft and sweet touches to the man's warm skin.

"how can you compare yourself to him when you are so different?" your words took him by surprise as he had never thought of it in that way before.

he had always been compared or thought of as fred's other half, his twin. it has always been fred and george. never just george.

"i-i hadn't thought of that. we're so often associated with one another." you watched the gears turning in his head as you lean forwards into him, feeling his natural pull.

"i don't associate you two together." a realization had occurred to george, that you were right, as you often were.

never once had you referred to him as fred's twin. in fact, to you, it has always been george and fred, as opposed to the older twin being first.

while george was often overlooked by everyone else, to you he wasn't.

this thought pulled a smile from him to which you returned.

"thank you. for always putting me first." your thumb came up to swipe away the stray tears that slid down his soft cheek as you smiled softly at him.

"george, i have and always will put you first." a pause hung in the air , the two of you noticing how close you had gotten.

there was a moment of hesitation, before george cupped your face in his rather large hands and pressed his lips to yours.

you felt as if you were floating, it all happened so quickly and now you were pressing your lips back against george's, your best friends, and crush's. it felt right. like everything had fell into place.

thanking the universe, you inhaled quickly before bringing his face closer to yours, if that was even possible, eliciting a soft groan from the man as you tugged on his red locks.

pulling away, regrettably, george grinned at you with flushed lips.

"why haven't we done that sooner?" he questioned with a laugh, one that never failed to make the butterflies emerge inside of you.

"i have no clue. but i don't want to stop." george simply laughed once more, before pulling you to sit on his lap.

"oh don't worry darling, i don't plan on stopping." that same mischievous smile had returned to the once upset boy, and that calmed both yours and his worries as george kissed you once more, the two of you happily floating in the other's grasp.

[miioouu]

I would neeevvvvveeerrr be with someone else fishy love! I'm here with you! Right now! I can't leave your sight most of the time and now it's even worse after you saw that...uh… totally random dude with “me”.

Wait, so I have competition for my yandere 👀 this is need and I'm totally gonna lose because in that dream I was only supposed to spy on her to see which potions she was making, I was also a yandere hunter. Not a witch hunter!

Lets just say I will die if the witch confronts me.

F, we both can't find stories 😔

I can see boiboi living for it the most, that kinky bastard- fishy would love it the most like, after something bad happened, maybe a break down or after he saw “you” with boiboi, just to make sure you're real and you have a reflection like a normal person lmao

Man we should really expand on my god boi, we only have his looks but what abt personality, he seems pretty lax with sexual stuff and if it's not a real physical thing. He also doesn't understand shit about normal human things.

I'm cursed by two yanderes 😔 sad

You know, sometimes I do remember my dreams but they're so long I don't even bother trying to remember them so I end up forgetting, if it was juicy or interesting I will tell but if it's only mildly interesting I don't even bother, like I swear my dream today, people had enough time to move houses and there were like 5 plot points with different people at the same time, none was that interesting, there was one count that was most interesting but of course I forgot that part 😔

Rika, like, they went HARD with trying to redeem her. TOO hard. It was basically forced and it made me hate her more, just from the fact that Cheritz is trying this hard. It's stupid honestly and it shows how hard they try :/ it's so hard that I swear a wattpad story about baldi x reader had better redeeming qualities for baldi. Like bro. Stop.

I don't hate V as much because they don't try to redeem him as hard. It's like normal you know, you can choose whether you forgive him or not, it's not something like you have to forgive him or else some 5 year old guilt trip shit happens.

I also just like V more because he's actually nice. Like genuinely a nice person. He tries to help Rika, she refuses, they get into an argument, she go pokey pokey V’s eyes now brokey, he helped us escape (I vaguely know what happens in V’s route but I played Saeran’s route three times now, Jumin 4 (doing 5 rn), so I know what happens in saerans route a lot, and i also played his after ending twice.) but in saerans route he decided he can't live without Rika because of this soulmate shit they got going on and Rika in the end is like “i'm gonna turn my sun into ashes” or some shit like that. Emphasis on “my”.

I swear V’s after ending judge route. It's a mess. I could tell you if you want, you probably don't want to get that damn ending yourself anyway. It's worse than most wattpad guilt trip stories like skdbk please why???

Also i think yoosung just has a MAJOR hero worship for her, basically obsession where it can seem like he's in love, but he just looks up to her A LOT. Anyway Rika is adopted :0

Oh man, maybe he's like, a planner or something, like, that's where well get married, I'm thinking of names for our children, that's where we'll have a date-

You get the idea.

Our local horny and sometimes romantic loner boiboi.

Long hair can be smexy, I've only seen fictional characters and some select few (I've only seen markiplier and Keanu reeves, everyone else I've seen are kind of ugli, probably because most I've seen also have that ugly teenage moustache. Pls shave. I don't really see many celebrities, so yeah)

Anyway, the day Aizawa gets short hair is the day I gauge my eyes out, stab my eyeballs and eye sockets, pour bleach in the wounds and wait until I die of blood loss or the bleach.

Especially a nicely designed cape that fits the character somewhat and isn't just plastered on there because yes.

I actually wanted to get Zen’s route first but I got yoosung, didn't really flirt with Zen after that unless the other option was a mean one. Then ill flirt, though yoosung did become jealous at one point 👀

It seems common that people would get yoosung when going for Zen. You just can't be mean to yoosung, but you have to at least onceif you want Zen. It's too easy to get yoosung hearts.

GIVE THE AFFECTION QWEEN CUDDLES-

Boiboi would totally jump on that.

-🐱nonny “you can decide if you want to take that literally or sexually”

Ok that's a beeg one! Let's start!!!

Fishy is just being stupid... If you think nommy is with someone else, maybe that's because you're not doing your job properly hmm?? Think about that 👀

Well... It's not really a competition. Ghost man wants to be with you, so you already know you're his. Though the witch, i feel like if he's been a ghost for waaaay too long, maybe she lost interest, lost hope. Mayne she could reverse the curse, but she's also sad and lonely... Maybe she'll curse you too👀

Your dreams are very complex and action filled. So yeah, remembering them must be so difficult. My dreams are very boring, so even if i tried to remember, it's basically just wasting my time.

I feel like that was chritz goal. They dont want us to like her, they want us to hate her. So they made her super duper annoying.

V is a nive person, a bit too nice to the point its annoying. He's naive. I understand that he tried helping her and all that. That's amazing. But after all the things she did to him, he still tried to help her?! Why bro! I understand you're in love, but that's obsession! Also, if i remember correctly, the way V talked, it didn't feel genuine. Like the "pick me guy". A bit too manipulative, yk? Like ooouh its ok if you dont forgive me, i understand uwu.... No shut up.

Yes! Yoosung was weird, a bit too baby like! It's not my fav type of characters (obv i love jumin, total opposites!) And same, i wanted to get zen but I got yoosung. And i also tried jaehee, but i got yoosung :(

Affection = sexy timez with boiboi sooo... Have fuuuun

[ethan-bears]

Home for Christmas (Nolan Patrick x Reader)

You've resigned yourself to spending this Christmas alone. But Nolan has other plans.

Author's note: I started writing this out as a thought to send to @lindylovegang for her soft thought night tonight but I realized it needed to be a small book whole fic instead, so I decided to do this instead of editing my final paper. This is also not edited. I might edit it later. Who knows.

Warnings: light swearing, holidays, slight angst but it gets fluffy real quick, it's my first fic so it's probably not great, I'm on mobile and I can't figure out "keep reading" and I'm very sorry

Word count: absolutely no idea but good luck fam

gif credit to: bretthowden

*****

This was not how you wanted to spend your first Christmas in Philadelphia. Ideally, you wouldn't even be in Philly at all right now. You should be on a plane back home to your family and friends and the warm, familiar streets of your hometown. You should be waking up tomorrow morning in your grandma's house with the smell of warm bread surrounding you like a hug.

But no. You were trapped.

The blizzard had started to roll in earlier this morning, and you thought to yourself that it wouldn't be that bad, right? It was just some flurries. They wouldn't ground any flights, right?

Oh how wrong you wound up being.

After three hours of waiting for news in the airport terminal, followed by another hour and a half desperately trying to reschedule your flight to a time that would still work and getting nothing out of every airline representative in the building, you somehow managed to get an Uber driver crazy enough to come get you in the ocean of snow. Fighting back tears, you tried to console yourself in the backseat. At least your apartment would be warm. And you had a little tree, so it would still feel like Christmas. You'd make some soup and Skype your family, and while it wouldn't be the same as being with them, it would be better than nothing!

"Reckless optimist," you sighed as you flipped the light switch to your apartment only to be met with continued darkness. Alone in a dark, cold, apartment on Christmas Eve, snowed in with nowhere to go in a city that came nowhere close to feeling like home. Merry Christmas. Slumping against the door, you felt your hot tears break free and cascade down your face. You decided to let all the stress and frustration that had been building all day take over your body, sobbing harder than you could ever remember. Each new wave shook your body, sending you to the floor. You didn't care. It couldn't get worse, so why not act like it?

During a pause in the festivities you decided to check your phone to see if you had any messages from your dad, only to find a text you definitely didn't expect from someone who was definitely not your father.

Sir Nolan the Rosy-Faced: hey, just checking in, i know you're probably mid flight rn but just wanted to make sure you land safely when you do. Crazy storm. Text me?

Sniffing, you paused to process the message. Nolan wanted to make sure you were safe? It shouldn't really have surprised you, but the fact that he was concerned enough to text you while he thought you were still midair was...touching.

You fired a short text back explaining that the flight wasn't happening, thinking he'd respond with a simple "okay" or an "oh, sorry to hear that :(". But the next text you got (mere seconds later) surprised you again.

Sir Nolan: oh my god that sucks! Wait.....does that mean you're home alone tonight?

Me: Yeah, and the power's out, so it's suuuper cold, but idk it's fine, I'll just layer up and go to bed early I guess

Sir Nolan: are you okay?

That one hit you like a truck. No, you thought, I'm really, really not.

Me: Yeah, I'll be fine

Sir Nolan: are you sure? Cause I can come over if you want.

Any other night, you would be losing your mind at an offer like that. Ever since you had met Nolan, you'd had the biggest crush on him. All other crushes seemed like weak sauce compared to how you felt about him. But you'd cried all your energy out. The best response your heart could muster was a meek, "Sure, but don't worry if the snow's just too much."

You were met with a resounding, "Already on my way."

You decided that if you were going to be having company you should at least get up off the floor. You shuffled your way into your bedroom, habitually flicking the light switch before you remembered it was pointless. You fumbled in the dark to your desk drawer, trying to find your flashlight, and once you found it you turned it on and started changing into your warmest pajamas. Now that you weren't just a puddle of self-pity, you started to think about Nolan's sudden inviting-over of himself. You first met him during training camp when your work friend brought you along to meet up with Travis, her boyfriend. She figured that since you were new to the city and also a huge hockey fan that it couldn't hurt to introduce you to some guys on the team and help you make some friends. You weren't sure what to make of Nolan at first. He seemed so quiet and awkward that you thought your own quietness and awkwardness would make conversation impossible with such a knockout of a man. You wound up being horribly wrong, once again, but that time it was in a good way. Neither of you were really the super-outgoing party type, so whenever one or both of you started getting exhausted with the atmosphere you'd usually drift off into your own conversation in a quieter part of the room. As a result, he became a good friend incredibly fast. It seemed there was nothing you couldn't talk about with him, even though you still got nervous about certain things. Like your personal feelings for him. But that had never come up before, so you were safe. For now.

You knew he knew all about how hard the transition to Philly has been for you. How homesick you get, how you can't help but wonder if you made a mistake taking the job offer that brought you here (even though it was your dream job), and how you felt like it was hard to click with so many new people. Which was probably why he seemed so worried about you being alone tonight. He knew you felt alone most of the time anyway.

An hour and a half had gone by and you were starting to get worried about him. He only lived 20 minutes away, and even with the snow, it shouldn't take him that long unless he was stuck and just too proud to call you. It had given you time to call your mom, which you were grateful for and made you feel a lot better, but you couldn't ignore the knot in your stomach anymore. You were just about to hit "call" when you heard a knock at the door. Or more like a thump at the door.

You practically sprinted over to open it for the man-sized popsicle with his arms full of grocery bags standing on your doorstep. You paused for a second with your mouth hanging open, both amazed by the fact that he actually came over and by...him. The cold made his already pink cheeks bright red, and the snowflakes were sticking to his long eyelashes and the free locks of hair that didn't fit under his beanie. You had never seen anything more beautiful in your life.

"Can...can I come in?" Nolan's teeth chattered, snapping you back to reality.

"Oh, yeah, sorry! God, Nol, you're shivering!" you remark, ushering him through the door. Not that inside was that much warmer, but anything was better than being out there.

"It's cold," he laughs.

"Wow, AND he's meteorologist!" you quip back. "What can Nolan Patrick not do?"

Shaking his head, he made a beeline for your kitchen, looking for a place to set his bags down.

"Took me forever to find a place that was still open tonight," he muttered, pulling what looked in the dark like to-go boxes out of one of the bags. You shined your flashlight up to the ceiling to make it light the whole room as Nolan continued to pull items from his three bags. You just stood there, still dumbfounded by him.

"Pat... what's all this?" you manage to squeak out.

"This," he said, pointing to the to-go tubs, "is soup. I'm not completely sure what kind, but I figured soup would be the best thing no matter what. I didn't know if you had any crackers, so I brought some saltines. And some oranges because I knew you'd want something fruity and healthy and oranges are festive. And this," he pulled a thermos out of the second bag, "is hot chocolate. Made it myself." He grinned, sliding it towards you, obviously proud of himself. You could barely contain your own grin, feeling yourself blush. You were proud of him too.

"I saved the best for last," he continued once you took a sip of the cocoa. You frowned.

"What else could you possibly have brought?" you asked, genuinely astonished.

He looked you in the eyes and gave you a smirk. Holy hell. You were glad he probably couldn't see how pink your own cheeks were getting. The things he did to you and he didn't even know.

He carefully pulled a basket out of the last bag, and you could see it was full of a bunch of other things. You couldn't believe it.

"Nolan..." You trailed off, feeling the tears starting to well up again. Inside the basket were a bunch of little gifts with a note that read "For: y/n, From: Us". It had some of your favorite candies, one of those cheesy home-state-scented candles, a scarf with your home team's name and logo on it, and a tin of your favorite tea from a tiny local tea shop in your home town. You tried your best to fight the tears, but you weren't strong enough, rendered useless from your earlier fit.

"Nol-" You couldn't even finish your question before your own sob choked you. You set your thermos and flashlight down to bury your face in your hands.

"Hey, hey," Nolan whispered, pulling you into a hug. You wasted no time in hugging him back, squeezing him as you sobbed into his chest. "Shhhh, it's okay," he muttered to the top of your head. He slowly ran a hand up and down your back, rocking you back and forth. It only made you more emotional. He had never hugged you before, and you hadn't been hugged like this in what felt like years. You just wanted to stay there in his arms forever and ignore the world around you.

"It was a team effort," he continued. "Some of us thought you could use some things that remind you of home."

"Who...who found the tea?" you said into his chest, muffled by his sweater.

"What?" He smiled, pulling out of the hug a bit to let you speak up.

You wiped your face and took a breath. "Who found the tea?"

He pulled the rest of the way out of the hug, much to your disappointment. He leaned his head down, staring at the floor.

"That was me," he mumbled, tucking a loose strand of hair behind his ear. "I remembered you mentioning it, and it was hard to work out, but they agreed to send me some." Somehow, his voice kept getting lower and lower.

You could hardly believe your ears. He remembered that? You swore you had only mentioned it once in passing after you got a really disappointing chai from a coffee place down the street. You had no idea he had been paying attention. And he went to all the trouble of getting a store with a locals-only business model to ship a product long-distance. You started to wonder if.... No, you thought, don't get your hopes up again tonight.

You stared at him for another moment, trying to soak in the situation. He seemed surprised when you went back in for another hug.

"Thank you so much!" you whisper, knowing that if you said it any louder you'd start crying again. You could feel him relax into the hug and gave him a little squeeze before you ended it.

"Soup time?"

"Soup time." Nolan nodded, practically beaming.

You sat on the couch, eating as carefully as you could in the dark, though your eyes were getting pretty adjusted. From then on, it was conversation as usual. It came so naturally with him that even when you weren't saying anything, you were still happy. You exchanged stories about your favorite Christmases, what you thought the best cookies are, and weird things your families do during the holidays for hours, barely even noticing the time or the cold.  At some point Nolan had pulled the blankets off the back of the couch and tossed them over both your laps. You didn't notice that you'd been getting closer and closer to him with every story until you laughed so hard you fell on his shoulder.

"Stop laughing!" He pouted, audibly trying to stifle his own laugh. "I almost got hypothermia. I could've died!"

"I can't...I can't!" you breathe between laughs. "You fell through the ice...but just one leg?!"

"Yeah, and I was stuck there on my side almost doing the splits between the ice and the water and my sister just stood there laughing. Just like you!" He nudged you, pretending to be annoyed. "But eventually she pulled me out and carried me back home. Couldn't move my leg for hours, it was just sticking straight out like..." He stuck his leg in the air, demonstrating, and only making you laugh harder. You could hardly breathe. You knew it probably felt funnier because of how exhausted you were, but you didn't care. Nolan had put a smile back on your face and back in your heart.

"Hey, Nolan?"

"Yeah?"

You swallowed. "I just... I'm not complaining that you're here, obviously, but... weren't you planning on spending tonight with Kevin and his family?"

"I was, but they've got each other, and someone else who's super special to me was sad and alone, which made me really sad to think about. You deserve to be happy and I wanted to help. Easiest decision I've ever made."

You really did not have it in you for another cry, so you settled for teasing him instead.

"That's really cheesy of you, softie."

"Take it while you can," he laughed.

"I know," you smiled.

Your eyes were starting to feel heavy and you let out a jaw-cracking yawn.

"Damn," Nolan remarked. You grunted in response, earning another laugh from him. "Wanna lay down?"

You nodded, leaning into his shoulder.

"You're warm," you sleepily drawl. You wanted to lay down, but you didn't want to get up to go to your bed. You wanted more snuggles, and right now you didn't care if he read into it or not.

He seemed to get the message, moving to lay down and taking you with him. He wrapped his arms around you after making sure the blankets covered you both as much as possible. You smiled contentedly, settling into your position and closing your eyes. You barely had time to contemplate how touchy he was being tonight compared to his normal reservations about hugs and touching before you were completely gone.

*****

Nolan woke up first the next morning. He was careful to move as little as possible to avoid waking you up. You looked so peaceful, curled up with your head on his chest. He felt his heart swell as you shifted to wrap your arms around his torso and fell back asleep within seconds. He smiled down at you, noticing how beautiful you were, even with your messy bedhead and your cheek squished against his chest. He wanted to stay in this moment forever. Just the two of you.

The power had come back on at some point during the night, so it was no longer freezing in the apartment, and the lights on your tiny tree had come on as well. He glanced back over to the kitchen to the basket on the counter. It had been embarrassing enough to admit to being the one who hunted down the tea like a police dog, so he left out the part about the whole gift basket being his idea in the first place. He would've bought you everything himself, but he wanted you to know that you had other friends, too, and that they wanted to show you that they were thinking of you. The scarf was Carter's idea, the candy TK's. Claude had suggested the candle, and being the local expert on how to be good to the woman he loved, Nolan took the advice and bought the candle as well. It did make him strangely jealous of your hometown in a way he couldn't quite explain. He was worried that you would be looking for any excuse to move back home, which he really didn't want. If it made you happy, then of course he'd support you, but he'd never felt for anyone the way he felt about you. The way you laugh, how passionate you get when you talk about something you care about, whether that's a person, a subject, a place, or what the best pizza topping is. He loved everything down to the way you word your sentences. He loved how much you loved.

He was awoken from his thoughts by you stirring and opening your eyes to look at him.

"Merry Christmas," you mumbled.

"Merry Christmas," he mumbled back.

You laid your head back down, enjoying the comforting rise and fall of his chest.

"You hungry? I can try and make you some breakfast. Emphasis on try," Nolan offered.

You laughed at the thought. "That'd be nice. But I don't wanna get up."

"Me neither," he sighed, tracing his thumb along your arm. He was not ready for when you suddenly shot off the couch, eyes manic and wide.

"Oh my god!" you shouted. "I didn't get you anything for Christmas! And you did all that last night!" You waved your hand at the kitchen. Nolan sat up, confused and cold, missing the weight of you on him.

"It's okay, y/n! I wasn't expecting anything."

"No, okay, I'm making you breakfast, and it's gonna be the best damn breakfast I've ever made. Lay back down," you insisted, marching off to the kitchen, wincing at the still-cold floor.

As nice as it sounded to stay under the warm blankets, Nolan didn't want to just sit there doing nothing. Suddenly he had an idea, even though it was a risky one. He decided it was a risk he needed to take eventually.

"Get out!" you playfully threatened, brandishing a spatula at him as he stepped into the kitchen. He put his hands up in mock surrender.

"I won't touch!"

"Good," you smirk, turning back to your pan.

Nolan shuffled around nervously, working up the courage to say what he wanted to. He swallowed and took a deep breath.

"I, uh...I have an idea for what you can give me. If you, uh, still want to give me something. Besides breakfast, I mean." Smooth, Patrick, he thought.

"What's that?" You met his gaze, making his stomach flip. The things you do to him and you have no idea.

"Maybe we can go out sometime? Like, just us. On purpose. To dinner or something?"

You looked like a deer caught in the headlights, making Nolan immediately second-guess himself. He bashfully broke your eye contact, focusing on the floor again. He felt the blush on his cheeks worsening.

"Are you... serious?" you ask, voice full of wonder.

"Of course I am!" he mumbled insistently. "Wouldn't ask if I wasn't."

You almost knocked him over with the force of your hug, a truly impressive feat.

"Yes, yes, a thousand times, yes!!!" you laughed, not even bothering to play it cool. Nolan smiled so much it started to hurt, but he didn't care. He felt like he could take off and fly, he was so relieved. The weight of the world was replaced by the weight of you clinging to his shoulders. And he couldn't imagine a better way to spend his Christmas. Maybe, just maybe, he thought, Christmas would be like this forever from now on.

*****

You relaxed into Nolan's arms as he followed you back to the stove, hugging you from behind and resting his chin on your shoulder. Suddenly, you felt something more than the giddy high of getting asked out by your crush. You felt a sort of peace you hadn't felt since before you moved.

You were home for Christmas.

[lbat1901]

Rantception S1•E1 - princeofmints exposed | ft. TatSquirp

(I am about a month late on posting this here)

Welcome to the first episode of my brand new series titled Rantception where I talk about a topic or some unfortunate soul who became a total jerk as of recently. I am starting this series off by talking about the user by the name of princeofmints.

princeofmints is apart of the Eddsworld community and they are apart of the official EW Amino, Tumblr, and Instagram. Unfortunately princeofmints is in some hot water right now.

Oh and before I get to that, I just want to make this clear, the princeofmints that I am referring to isn't the one who made tomtord p*rn. This princeofmints is actually accused of tracing and being a total d*ck.

Also they got banned from Amino, but they are still going strong on both Tumblr and Instagram.

One more thing: don't harass them. Instead I want you to stop supporting them. Don't not praise them.

With that out the way, let's get into the news.

I unfortunately didn't know any of this drama that happened till seeing callout posts about it. But I used to like princeofmints's posts until what happened recently.

I decided to to take a look at their wall after seeing a few callout posts on them before they got taken down.

Annnnnd yeah.....they are such an arsehole. Just...just look at these screenshots....

(the third one is my favorite in terms of arsehole energy that's being radiated from it)

I'll be honest with you, the third is the one that show the bitterness of princeofmints. Trying to guilt trip you. I'm sorry to say this, but it's not working. Nice try.

Now I'll handing the rest of this over to the one and only Squirp/TatSquirp who've agreed to be on the show and I certainly didn't kidnap them.

Squirp: ...Why am I here? Why am I tied u-

Lbat1901(me): Shhhh! Just give the audience your side on this

Squirp: Ok, fine...*clears throat*....so a week ago, I've made a callout post exposing princeofmints titled "Dethroning a Prince". It took me awhile to everything and not too soon after posting it on Animo, I've also posted it on Instagram.

Oh boy...it got taken down. No actually I got told by a model on Animo to take it down which I did while on Instagram it got flagged for harassment. I eventually reposted it.

princeofmints (or what I like to call her, Prince) is a 15 year old artist who mostly draws Tom, Tord, and the ship TomTord. She was on the EW Amino since January 13th of this year before getting banned. S

Alright with that out of the way, I'll try to make this brief

She also has been known to cause quite the trouble.

I have been caught up to speed on what Prince has done even learning th as t she had actually scammed someone.

I believe that Lbat told you this already, but Prince's name was stolen by someone who has the same name, but let's dwell on this.

Part 1 - Tracing:

Squirp: Ok so, a few days ago some of my friends and I looked at one of Prince's art and discovered that it was traced from an already existing drawing made by P-Nim. Of course Prince denied this and claimed that it was her own art.

Ok I'll make this clear, Prince didn't draw it for a DTIYS. If Prince didn't trace it then she shouldn't be claiming it as her own.

Also if you want to compare posts or have a look for yourself, you can't cause she deleted it. So much for being reasonable which goes into this next part....

Part 2 - Blocking those who've cornered you for being unreasonable:

Squirp: Oh yes, just like TBATF, Prince also blocks people for calling her out. Unlike TBATF who only block people for giving them criticism and calling them out on their behavior, Prince blocks people for many reasons.

One of them being totally unreasonable. She blocked one of my friends who called her out for tracing. Prince even deleted several comments when trying to defend herself for being called out before deciding to hit the block button.

She even blocked me after I tried to call her out on her wall. I did PM her a few days later about and guess what her response was. The reason why she blocked me was because she didn't like me.

My god....that has to be most stupidest as all hell reason to block someone and folks, we're on the second part on this and things are already getting heated.

Part 3 - Being a b*ch isn't all that cool:

Squirp: Hold on a minute, why is b*ch censored?

(Editor: that's because it's Lbat's show and I am meant to help with anything that Lbat puts out for everyone to see)

Squirp: Yeah, but why? Who cares anyway?

(Editor: well you're probably have a point, but it's my job. Now are you going to continue to argue or are you going to keep going with your side of the story?)

Squirp: I am...geez! I've never meant an editor that's who picky. This isn't YouTube with the whole COPPA thing you know.

Anyway..... pt 3....Prince has to be one of the biggest d*cks that I have ever talked to and- oh my god, why would you censor the word- forget it. Forget it...

Erm...yeah....she cursed at some many people that it's just mindboggling. She's not the most pleasant person to talk to on Amino or anywhere else.

Before you say that she probably has some mental health issues, don't even bother. Well I know she does has some issues, but it doesn't give her the excuse to not be a total d*ck. People who do have issues are at least well spoken and are respectful to others.

But Prince on the other hand, not a freaking single chance.

Part 4 - Stop acting sad:

Squirp: You're probably thinking to yourself, "Wow, Prince is a jerk" and you'd be right. But to make matters worse, she likes to guilt trip people.

How? Well she tries to make you feel sorry for her by giving you a sad sad tale before deciding to cuss you out.

That's right, it's pretty low for her. I don't need to explain why this is bad just because it is. It's really scummy especially when she's in the wrong here. Next!

Part 5 - Don't let Prince do commissions. EVER:

Oh yeah, she actually did this. I did found the person who got scammed and they are a person known as BadBoy.

You see BadBoy commissioned Prince to do a drawing for 92 coins. Unfortunately for BadBoy, Prince said that the price was actually lower than that. But it gets much much worse than that.

Prince got wicked with them and refused to give other pieces of art to BadBoy. Eventually BadBoy had enough and asked for a refund. That's when things started to escalate really fast.

Prince told BadBoy to piss off. After a long battle, Prince gave BadBoy 72 coins back when BadBoy asked for a full refund.

Squirp: I have been saving this part for last and it gave me a reason to make a callout on Prince in the first place. She literally scammed someone over 72 coins.

In summary, Prince just stole BadBoy's money and was a total d*ck towards them.

And that should do it for now, but I one final message to Prince. If you're reading this now while getting harassed for being callout for your crap: none of this, and I stress this a lot, none of this wouldn't have happened if you were to just act a tad bit kinder and a whole bit wiser.

Oh and maybe if you would've just listened. Also running away from your problems, lying, and pretending that they didn't happen makes you look like the bad guy here.

You know, I wouldn't mind you being on Animo at all if you just shallow your pride and try to do better by apologizing to everyone.

I didn't mean to make my callout post to hurt you in a way. In fact, I still believe that you can change. But atlas, your problems need to be addressed to make that happen.

All you need to do is try. That's it. That's all I ask for.

Lbat1901(me): *claps* Nicely done, Squirp. Nicely done.

Squirp: Thanks Lbat. It's been a pleasure being on here. Now can I go home now?

Lbat1901(me): Uhh.....*walks away from Squirp and walks out of the room before shutting the door*

Squirp: Lbat? Uh Lbat? Lbat? This isn't funny! Untie me! Hey cameraman, you're still here. Untie me, please

Camraman: *shrugs before shaking their head*

Squirp: What do you mean no? Ugh!

{screen cuts to Lbat sitting in a chair}

Lbat1901(me): Well that's the end of the first episode of Rantception. I want to thank TatSquirp for coming on and helping me out. Please check them out on the EW Amino and possibly their Instagram as well while you're at it.

[digimondestined]

For the emojis meme: all of them :P feel free to skip the ones you don't like/you're not comfortable answering

☝ - How tall are you? Taller than you :P ✔ - Sexual Orientation; Hetero but occasional doubts🚬 ♒ 🍷 - Do you Smoke/Drink/Drugs: Nah; it makes up for where else I lack in responsibility.😳 - Age you get mistaken for? *MUCH LAUGHTER*💉 - Tattoos:  Want one, or two.✂️ - Piercings: No thank you, TERRIFYING.👌 - Best friend: Soulmate? Yes. Otherwise, no.♥ - Do you like anyone? All the time. 🎤 - Some favorite bands: The Fray, One Republic, The Cab, Maroon 5, Secondhand Serenade🎶 - Some favorite songs: Something More, How to Save a Life, Hello - Adele, Perfect - Hedley, Haven’t Had Enough - Marianas’ Trench😒 - Biggest pet peeve? Lots; people talking when I just want quiet (which i guess in others’ defense, is often but :P)📝 - Story from your childhood. Aah! I just remembered; I HAVE A GOOD ONE! Once, my grandmother, my little sister and I were going around the neighborhood in a walk; my sister was small enough she needed her stroller and I just liked to run and scream like all kids. As we were walking, there was this house’s driveway, across from us where there was a little bird (sparrow sized) and a big raven/crow was sort of attacking it; like sitting on the tiny thing and pecking at it. And the little guy had a small flock that dive bombed the dumb raven occasionally but it wasn’t helping much.So I crossed the street and started yelling. And the big bird took off, only to land on the tree nearby. The little sparrow didn’t because I assume he was hurt a little bit. And so, I tried to lift him up, like with my bare hands and he didn’t really like that so he kinda flew away. to the other side of the street back to my sister/grandma, but flight was sorta awkward.Anyways, silly baby sister picked up “yelling at birds is good” so she screamed a little and it frighted the tiny guy into ducking between this gap in the fence and then we just left; but I was really proud and my grandma was telling me if he could get into the neighbor’s yard, he’d be okay.💬 - I wish…‼️ - Something you’ll change? Lots?💦 - What makes you horny? Muscle boys with their abs and arms...and shitty perceived personalities but their soft insides...  sorry, got lost for a second;🌟 - A wish you’ll wish for? OTPs become canon; LONG TERM: a pet that’s more affectionate when I’m older; meet ya and some other great friends; do something that makes a mark on the world; help someone (pay it forward I guess? 🔥 - Something spicy you like? OTPs ;👃 You hate the smell of …. I’m pretty nose blind; but mint is kinda ick imo.👊 - Something you hate? Much. Humiliation, argument that lacks common sense; being challenged and not being allowed to END THE OTHER PERSON.🚶 - Single💬 💌 - Can we text? Fan mail me? Yes 💍 - Marry me? Practically have. 💘

💭 - Favorite foods? I will eat anything I haven’t eaten recently. In particular? Random selection: Mashed potatoes, instant noodles, sandwiches; the fancy kinds :P☀ - Story about your day. Nah.💘 - Top 5 celebrity crushes? Celebs are dumb; highly disappointed in the ones i can think of in the moment so none🎥 - Top 5 favorite movies? rn: McFarland, USA. Nemo. Digimon.📺 - Top 5 favorite TV shows? Rn: undateable, Superstore.✏ - Random fact about yourself. Extremely hypocritical, ironic considering how much I dislike hypocrisy.✈️ - Where are you from? Canada.🚀 - Where do you wanna visit? Anywhere that’s an away.😍 - Do you have a crush? Unfortunately, yeah.😷 - Something you hate eating? Anything I’ve eaten 4-5 times in the same week becomes gross.🙈 - What makes you shy? Performing a skill I normally like to say I do alright in front of highly respectable people.💃 - Can you dance? No.💏 - Do you love anyone? Nah👟 - Favorite shoe(s) to wear? Shoes are gross, running shoes pleaze. Occasionally, going barefoot makes ya feel like a kid though.🌴 - A island you would visit? Caribbeans are nice but all islands are.🌎 - A country you would visit? Australia; for wildlife.🌀 - Favorite type of weather? I used to think I liked stormy days and now I think I like snow days but it does depend. I like being in the rain when it’s pouring so hard you can barely see because everything’s a little different with different perception, I like snow when you shovel so much it gets you hot and sweaty and you just decide to throw yourself onto it on your back and it’s really peaceful, looking up at the skies, but I also like windy sun days when your hair gets wild and you laugh because everything feels easy breezy.🔮 - Do you believe in luck? Yes.📱 - What kinda phone do you have? Nameless ugly.📅 - Favorite time of the year? April; though fall months are good, April is sort of the light before summer kills with heat📚 - Career goal you want? Psych? Environmental? Script writing? Authoring? Idk🍇 - Favorite fruits? Mango or watermelon🚘 - Dream car(s)? Those sexy shiny all-black cars vroom.🚔 - Have you ever been arrested? That’s too exciting for a goody like me sigh🚼 - Do you have or want kids? Yes and no. Probably, because most people do, we want happiness to share. But no because I don’t got romance and idk that’s my first priority unfortunately.🐶 - Do you own a pet? Birds😔 - Something that makes you sad? Realizing the things that haven’t changed; it makes me fear they never will😡 - What pisses you off? Misunderstandings between people because UGH sometimes life has to be shitty and things go wrong when people don’t deserve the way things happen😈 - Are you a freak? Little bit (:

[pokefanbri]

1st I have to say this b4 I repeat the post from fb. This is a place where I can speak my mind freely without judgement, speak my peace even. Which is exactly what im gonna do so prepare for a read. So think what u want idc, but the last thing I wanna do is tick some1 I know off cause on some level there's a mutual appreciation & respect regardless of my impression. And anyone that reads this isn't obligated to understand my opinion & I dont expect u to. With my brain its my thought process to let information out of my head so I can put things aside, observe & absorb more lol. Writing is another tool or coping mechanism for my anxieties & other psych ailments, treatment for my mental health depends on it & other hobbies in other words, especially during shutdown, something to focus on. Heck even youtube is recommended by my doctor if it keeps me happy lol. But because ill be working again, I may not have time to do alot of things I like sadly..idk i just wouldnt want to be burnt out & focus on more important things. I have a high respect for anyone working around people during this time & it must worrisome for u too, means I have to keep on my toes as well soon..its a scary world out there for an introvert but I was killin it in NY too. It was just a slow steady process with all the limitations & moving my life up there wasn't easy to begin with but I pulled through & did it all...only for it to be taken away.

So, I'm an Irish, German, Canadian,British Mut from tucson. Maternal & paternal immidiate families lineage mixed made me, including my NY blood from my bio dad. The rest is all over Europe but u get the idea. Tucson may be where i was born & my 1st home without a father & raised not knowing (were mardi gras babies btw 😒)

But NY is & will forever be my 2nd home i dont care what any1 says, I felt I belonged there. Its the other half of me quite literally.Theres a memory that's really been bugging me. Last day b4 i left it, a bald eagle flew across my path in the sky no joke going NE & I was departing back to the SW. I chose the eagle years ago cause I identify with it. including the background symbolism in different phases of my life that included them lol, but to actually see one was just amazing.

They symbolize strength+freedom in general despite it standing for the country from sea to shining sea lol. Also Braviary was always in my pokemon team besides pikachu since its gen came out lol. I've always been strong, whether some believe it to be true or not is their problem, only I know the things I've gone through. Point is different ends of the spectrum its always been with me throughout in some way & im glad i got to share it with someone that gave me the freedom I needed.

But yea I experienced what its like to be there & got to know that part of me even if I didn't find him & maybe didnt care...I feel I was meant to be there. I was in touch with my roots, lower Temps & above sea level rather than high temps & below sea level 🤣 I loved everything about my time up there. It'll always be a part of me, & I hope to see it again. But I digress.

But in regards to the relationship itself, emphasizing on what i said b4. Just as it i got "settled" in it was gone & I had no clue what was happening without my knowledge, the whole plan to bring me back, all of it, the whole chain of events that unfolded the way it did starting with leaving a marriage in the 1st place to be with him i mean come on lol. Chasing a dream that didn't play out the way we had hoped. I took leap of faith & I ended up starting over twice in 1 year with no benefit of the doubt. I still have my ny health insurance for the rest of the yr, I have to add it to my list to apply again in az. Ive been wearing the wrong prescription glasses for 6 months under quarantine & they're just now getting to stage 4 of opening lol. Just understand how frustrating that actually is for someone like me & u totally get it 😅 U want to take care of business but sometimes you're limited & gotta work around it. had all that covered there & then was told I settled, wrong thing to say & its no wonder I didn't blow up in his face right there & then 😒. But I have retraint & can control myself. Though it was out of my hands the new relationship didn't have to go sour, been just as long if not more, could've actually thrived given the proper balance with room to grow. Idk, Sometimes I honestly don't think anyone believed in me. I mean I have no debt, no record, no kids, im a clean slate type of girl lol. Yes I did end up feeling unappreciated, underestimated, a bit neglected, insecure about my body, ashamed for being myself, & I shouldn't have to feel that way at all & if that happens there obviously something off. I just didnt know what it is he wanted & needed, i wanted to help & be a good partner to this dude but why is it bad to ask the same in return? I shouldn't have to drastically change myself to fit someones standard i know, but...i needed the old him back, I missed the old us & wanted to get back to that.. Was always so closed off & probably ended up in his own head who knows, maybe there was guilt for some of the things he did & didnt want to hurt me anymore, spare my feelings any more than it did b4 it was too late.idk whatever the excuse i still don't know what triggered it all to fail so easily & i don't think i ever will. But ending up with the conclusion that I was the problem, its narcissistic to even believe that & i won't accept it. Not when he can't confront his own issuse & put blame onto himself too.. it was a low blow & literally felt like my heart was pierced at the sound of it. If im to blame its the other way around as well. My point of view wasn't acknowledged so this is my take & experiences of happened so plz dont hate me for speaking my truth.

But yea I can tell when somethings not right & feel strong empathy for others emotions. I knew something was different, there were signs everywhere since the mistrust started & during the last half of that time with him I questioned everything but sat in my own headspace as well as he did just thinking about it. If anything we failed eachother, the blame is on us both but idk what else i could've done to get through to him. That's the stubbornness, he wouldn't budge. Despite how things went down..Leaves me to think, what was the point of having me there in the 1st place, to not follow through with our shared hopes & dreams but instead spiral into such resentment for me that the interest faded. But at the at the same time...even if it ended early for him, I didn't give up & I fought to keep us okay which it was for the most part. Hindsight is 20/20, it definitely wasn't negative all the time. In fact things were great between us & acted like goofballs together, that right there is a friend despite if the stronger feelings weren't mutual. Nobody with hate in their heart acts like that, he was good, the best, cheered me up when I was down, shared interests & did things for eachother. But that alone makes me question what was truth & what was fiction sometimes ever since the trust between us started to fade. Am I in the right to feel what im feeling right now? Im angry & upset yes very, but the kindness he had throughout..he did care in his own way...which makes things so much harder.

Tripadoodle if some way you're listening, I hope u know now where im coming from. For your own benefit & quest to be a better man like you always wanted...actually try. Head my advice. Making yourself better shouldn't be put on a womans shoulders to do for u without her getting lifted in return...its alot of weight to handle for 1 person to carry lol. Get off your ass & build on yourself, learn from everything that happened & become better for yourself & the sake of others, Because it starts with u. Go to church if possible or watch them, it really does help. Even from across the country I still want u to do just as good & help u as a friend. You promised we could remain friends & im holding my end of the bargain whether u like it or not lol it was your idea during the ride here. All I wanted in the end was to not lose u in my life completely...but i should be patient i know.. Theres more space, im not contacting u directly & respecting that, eventually ill stfu lol but I feel I need this rn. I should hate u,but I cant hate u, I do still care, u had that affect on me so much that I can't really listen to others when they say ur a douchbag lol, u were still my rock the whole time even if u didn't feel the same after a while & u did help me alot as well. I see the good in people & u are good, with well balanced snarkiness & humorous sass to boot. light a fire under ur own ass & ull be okay lol. Never stopped believing in u. Ive seen what you can do, you're very smart & know your sh*t, u will go far lol. And as a friend I'd lend u my strength if I could but the most I can do is pray for things like safety/protection, healing, forgiveness, guidance, etc. Leave it to God if u feel compelled to. Give zanabell a hug for me.

God i talk way too much 😅 No im not doing any of this for attention, I want my voice to be heard as well as a possible learning experience if it had that effect on anyone. The things we learn build character & help us understand a little more about ourselves. Probably shouldn't share cuz its nobody's business, yea ive thought of that too.. But its a blog lol, Tumblr allowed it to be that space, opinions and rants are allowed & encouraged. Nothing wrong with that 🤷‍♀️ so who gives a crap.

These are pictures of the NY sunrise & AZ sunset. Clouds always get me cuz of the shapes, used to to take pics of them all the time. once saw mario holding a hammer when I was a kid 😂 3rd & 4th pic is a split rainbow, never seen that b4...either someone found the gold or its deciding whether or not to connect. Probably was connected but I missed it lol. But then I looked behind me after the split 1 disappeared & a double rainbow was forming. Nature can be scary but also beautiful

[threemoonsareshining]

i think you're such a cool person can you do as many as you'd like of the get to know you asks? i couldn't choose! i'm just desperate to know you lol

Hi anon! There are a lot of asks and I’m not that cool but I’m sad and bored again so I’ll do as many as I can.

1. Who was the last person you held hands with? I don’t think I’ve ever really held hands for real with anyone but I’m pretty sure the last time was about a week ago with one of my best friends bc we were in a place with lots of people and we didn’t want to get lost 2. Are you outgoing or shy? I’m the shyest person I know (actually no, I know a girl who is even shyer than me but I’m pretty close)3. Who are you looking forward to seeing? Not to sound cheesy or anything but I really want to see this guy I had something weird going on with not because of any special reason I just want to know where things are going4. Are you easy to get along with? I’d like to say I am but actually it’s really really hard to keep in touch with me and I’m not good at making conversation at all6. What kind of people are you attracted to? First of all, I’m not usually attracted to people at all, I don’t know why and when I am I always ask myself “girl why this one exactly?” and honestly, I don’t know. There are just some persons I feel comfortable with in a specific way and  then attraction grows from there idk I’m really not used to being attracted to anyone9. Does talking about sex make you uncomfortable? Extremely10. Who was the last person you had a deep conversation with? A friend of mine when I was really drunk at his house waiting for my parents to pick me up. I don’t really remember what we talked about but it felt very nice.11. What does the most recent text that you sent say? it says “no da miedo hihihi” which translates to “it’s not scary hihihi”12. What are your 5 favorite songs right now? right now I can’t stop listening to Fiji Water by Owl City (i’m so excited he’s releasing new music!), Your Mother’s Eyes, Rythm and Blues and Take a Walk by The head and the heart and It’s only life by The Shins.13. Do you like it when people play with your hair? I like it because it feels so so relaxing but at the same time it makes me anxious because I think that the more people touch it the dirtier and more damaged it gets and as a person who spends a considerable amount of time on my hair, that is not so nice15. What good thing happened this summer? I went to a festival in the town next to mine and I got to see all my friends after a long time and I had such a good time my heart hurts every time I think about it16. Would you kiss the last person you kissed again? Yess (idk if it’s bc I really like him or I just want to kiss someone)18. Do you still talk to your first crush? No! Actually I saw him a few months ago after… 6 years and we looked at each other like “are you who I think you are?”. I never really talked to him, he treated me like shit and he’s responsible for many of my insecurities so I believe it’s better this way hah21. What are you bad habits? I don’t sleep, I don’t pay as much attention as I should to my loved ones, I forget to eat and shower and I scratch my face like there’s no tomorrow my friend23. Do you have trust issues? Hell yeah I do. Literally everyone I knew left me when I was like 15 or so which is, you know, a crucial stage of your emotional development and stuff so since then I’ve never got close to anyone because what better strategy than not to be invested enough in a relationship so if it ends you don’t feel so bad about it!25. What part of your body are you most uncomfortable with? My ears for sure. They stick out so that’s why I never wear my hair up in public. I thought about getting surgery but I want to stay true to myself and stuff.28. Who are you most comfortable around? I’m not 100% comfortable with anyone but I guess my best friend is a strong candidate.30. Do you ever want to get married? I never think about that because my brain always tells me “first find someone who is actually willing to marry you and then we’ll think about it”31. If your hair long enough for a pony tail? It’s long enough for 6 ponytails if you put your mind into it34. Do you play sports? What sports? Sports are bad and I hate them36. Have you ever liked someone and never told them? I liked this guy for like 6 years and I literally never spoke a word to him but I think the way I looked at him made it pretty obvious (I guess that’s why he avoided me all the time)37. What do you say during awkward silences? I’m the Queen of awkward silences and I’ve learnt that it’s ok to not say anything. Or I’ll just sigh a lot.39. What are your favorite stores to shop in? Don’t make me think about shops rn bc I spent the whole afternoon trying to find something to wear to the 5 million Christmas dinners I have and everything was either too expensive, too ugly or just looked terrible on me so yeah I’m pretty mad40. What do you want to do after high school? I wanted to study something arts-related like filmmaking, music or dance, you know, the only things I actually used to enjoy but instead of that I decided to study economics because I hate myself41. Do you believe everyone deserves a second chance? I think this depends on the circumstances but in my opinion and taking into account my own experience I’ll always give a second chance, maybe not immediately but eventually, I will.42. If you’re being extremely quiet what does it mean? It means I’m being me haha43. Do you smile at strangers? I try to but it’s scary45. What makes you get out of bed in the morning? I have no reason to get out of bed in the morning besides the fact that if I stop doing the things I should do I’ll never be able to catch up and everyone will go on with their lives while I stay the same and become mediocre and that’s just inconceivable to me. So basically I don’t live for myself but for the expectations people have of me.48. Have you ever been drunk? Yes and I wish I was rn honestly49. Have you done anything recently that you hope nobody finds out about? Yes and since I don’t want to tell anyone I won’t say what it is52. One thing you wish you could change about yourself? I wish I wasn’t worried about literally everything because it’s so tiring and it keeps me from thinking about more important stuff64. Tell us the story of your first kiss? About a month ago I was at this party and everyone was telling me one of my friends I had been talking to for a while wanted to hook up with me and I kinda wanted to too but I’m too shy and anxious to make any moves so I got drunk, and  after avoiding him like 6546 times (bc I was really worried I would look stupid not bc I didn’t want to) I finally kissed him in front of an entire crowd of strangers and all my friends found out about it right afterwards so it was like a public event and I felt really exposed so yeah it wan’t ideal~ but also not the worst (I cringed so much while writing this, it was so awkward my god)69. Are you watching tv right now? Not right now but I’m about to watch the new episode of Crazy ex-girlfriend 72. How many pillows do you sleep with? 2, one for my head and other by my side to keep me some company (I’m so lonely oh my god)73. Do you sleep with stuffed animals? A shar-pei puppy dog I have since I was born (it’s so so cute I love it his name is wrinkles)75. Favourite animal? Cats are not only my favourite animals but one of my favourite things on earth78. Favourite ice cream flavour? since ice cream is my favourite food I can’t really choose one flavour (anything but banana flavour tho)81. Favourite tv show? GoT and Mr Robot I can’t choose but there are so many82. Favourite movie? Billy Elliot86. Favourite character from Finding Nemo? Bruce the shark, he deserves more recognition94. How many sweaters/hoodies do you have? I own lots of sweaters because you can never own enough sweaters (until you run out of space in your closet which is what’s happening to me)95. Last movie you watched? Tulip Fever. Not one of my favourites but last night I felt like watching some historic drama and romance shit (love it every once in a while). Alicia Vikander and Dane Dehaan tho98. Do you tan a lot? I used to but since I rarely leave my room during the summer I’ve become The Pale Friend™ 99. Have any pets? Two cats and I used to have fish but they weren’t my thing and I decided that no more fish would die because of me (I really tried but they just didn’t survive idk why)100. How are you feeling? I’m feeling really anxious right now and I can’t sleep. Partly it’s because I’ve got a lot of papers to write and a presentation on Monday and none of them are going especially well tbh, but there’s something else that is making me feel extremely uneasy and bad about myself and idk what it is but I’d like it to stop thank you very much102. Do you regret anything from your past? I regret not being able to enjoy these last 3 or 4 years of my life because they could’ve been some of the best years of my life but I was so full of sadness and hatred I just couldn’t pay attention to anything else108. What should you be doing? sleeping since 1 am but it’s 4 am and here we are115. Do you play the Wii? Who would I be without Just dance and Animal Crossing 116. Are you listening to music right now? yes, Rainbow Veins by Owl City (how unexpected)117. Do you like chicken noodle soup? I had that for dinner and it was beautiful118. Do you like Chinese food? The other day I cried tears of happiness because my mom ordered Chinese food for lunch119. Favourite book? Memorias the Idhún120. Are you afraid of the dark? Not so much now but not so long ago I would get what now I can consider almost panic attacks because the dark made me feel so anxious. I’d stay paralysed in my bed, feeling my arms numb and I can swear I heard stuff in my head and I got the feeling that I was literally dying.126. Are you currently bored? A little (these are a lot of questions but I want to finish them now)129. What your zodiac sign? Taurus131. Your bestfriend of the opposite sex likes you, what do you do? This is happening right now and I don’t like him that way so I just try to keep everything the same but also I try to keep the distances so he doesn’t misinterpret things (this makes me feel so bad for him sometimes but I’m trying to make him see that not liking him romantically doesn’t mean I don’t enjoy being with him). Let’s hope it works.133. Favourite lyrics right now? “I’ve been down the very road you’re walking now / It doesn’t have to be so dark and lonesome / It takes a while but we can figure this thing out / And turn it back around”  from It’s only life by The Shins.137. How tall are you? 164cm which I think is 5,3 feet138. Curly or Straight hair? My hair is curly af and it’s very inconvenient for… life you know140. Summer or Winter? Summer because of the holidays winter because of the feeling141. Night or Day? Night145. Tea or Coffee? Tea but coffee has been saving my life these past weeks146. Was today a good day? Today was a wasted and disappointing day.150. Get the closest book next to you, open it to page 42, what’s the first line on that page? “Con Elodin nunca se sabe —dije—. Si no está loco, es el mejor actor que he conocido jamás” from The Wise Man’s Fear. It translates to something like “’Who can say with Elodin?’ I said. ‘If he isn’t crazy, he’s the best actor I’ve ever met.’”

Congrats if you’ve managed to read all this without unfollowing me  🍃🍃🍃⛄️⛄️⛄️

[ourlittlebitofnothinguniverse]

Hey for the ask thing, all the questions you're comfortable with answering

oh boy!!! heck yeah fun shit thanks my dude! little did u Kno…… I LOVE oversharing !!! lmao muahahahahaha i’m probably gonna answer all of them thank u for enabling it lmfao

1. Do you ever doubt the existence of others than you?

yah on Rly Bad days

2. On a scale of 1-5, how afraid of the dark are you?

like… 3.5? i like the dark but,,, ‘m Scare,,,,,

3. The person you would never want to meet?

Orange Turnip

4. What is your favorite word?

it changes tbh,, hm but i can’t think of any rn!

5. If you were a type of tree, what would you be?

i’d be….. a nice oak! thicc and full of secrets

6. When you looked in the mirror this morning what was the first thing you thought?

i didn’t lmao reflection what’s that

7. What shirt are you wearing?

i’m wearing the dress i wore to work

8. What do you label yourself as?

annoying or boring lmao but also the Goblin King and that is Good

9. Bright room or dark room?

i still don’t know if this is referring to like paint shade or like the amount of light it gets or like if i sleep in a bright room or dark room so like??? *shrug emoji*

10. What were you doing at midnight last night?

i was?? drawing i think

12. Who told you they loved you last?

i think it was @wrenn-frug​ 💕💖 lov u fren!

13. Your worst enemy?

dunno man probably myself but that sounds cliche so like??? the sun bc it always burns me

14. What is your current desktop picture?

a screenshot from song of the sea!!! lOVE that movie!!!! i’d post it but like?? i don’t think i have it saved anymore or if i do i don’t feel like looking but it’s that one scene where they’re walking thru the pretty field towards the trees and there’s foxes in the corner and she’s playing the shell it’s so pretty,,,,,

15. Do you like someone?

uh yah my cat

16. The last song you listened to?

Young God - Halseygood song lov it,,,,

17. You can press a button that will make any one person explode. Who would you blow up?

oraNGE TURNIP

18. Who would you really like to just punch in the face?

orange turnip my dude i Hate

19. If anyone could be your slave for a day, who would it be and what would they have to do?

uh nobody ????

20. What is your best physical attribute? (showing said attribute is optional)

my squishy thighs and my fantastic stretch marks (which have taken me YEARS to accept)

21. If you were the opposite sex for one day, what would you look like and what would you do?

No

22. Do you have a secret talent? If yes, what is it?

????????????? secret???? talent?????? lemme check, ,, , , *reaches into a bag* nope bitch empt y aint got No Talent lmao

23. What is one unique thing you’re afraid of?

okay so like this is really dumb and i partially answered this in this ask abt the flushing toilets @ night thing but like to elaborate and make it even more dumb not only am i afraid to flush toilets @ night bc it’s just rly creepy and loud to me (esp if i’ve been asleep) but like,, , sort of in the same vein of fear is that when i was little my older sister told me that there was a ghost in the toilet and if i don’t flush it’ll get me and like i kno it’s not tru but like,,,,,, Sometimes,,,,,, (i must clarify i’m not scared of toilets themselves but like flushing freaks me out sometimes like @ night or if i don’t flush fast enough lmao don’t look @ me i’m a mess)

24. You can only have one kind of sandwich. Every sandwich ingredient known to humankind is at your disposal.

Excuse? is this like that i can ONLY eat this sandwich or is it that this is the only sandwich i can ever eat or like i can only ever have one last sandwich bc honestly i’m Not Okay with any of those scenarios no matter how many ingredients i get for the initial creation

25. You just found $100! How are you going to spend it?

Dream daddy dating simulator lmao uh?? also probably more food for archie bc he is Expensive

26. You just got a free plane ticket to anywhere in the world, but you have to leave immediately. Where are you going to go?

Ireland probably. always wanted to see ireland

27. An angel appears out of Heaven and offers you a lifetime supply of the alcoholic beverage of your choice. “Be brand-specific” it says. Man! What are you gonna say about that? Even if you don’t drink booze there’s something you can figure out… so what’s it gonna be?

“Even if you don’t drink booze there’s something you can figure out” like???? no???? if u don’t drink alcohol why would u want a lifetime supply??? unless i could like…. sell it??? whats the Most Expensive kind i’ll just get an unending supply of heavenly Expensive Alcohol to sell for incredibly inflated prices to the rich bc it’s From Heaven and give the money to the poor bc like,,, why not

28. You discover a beautiful island upon which you may build your own society. You make the rules. What is the first rule you put into place?

bitches gotta keep they damn opinions to themselves if they can’t respect somebody’s life based on factors they can’t help (race, religion, orientation, gender etc) also no money like We Don’t Need It i’m so tired of Needing money

29. What is your favorite expletive?

Fuck bc u can use it in So Many situations

30. Your house is on fire, holy shit! You have just enough time to run in there and grab ONE inanimate object. Don’t worry, your loved ones and pets have already made it out safely. So what’s the one thing you’re going to save from that blazing inferno?

o shit probably the twenty dollar metallic watercolors i got bc shit son??? actually probably like my laptop or smth idk

31. You can erase any horrible experience from your past. What will it be?

my childhood thx

32. You got kicked out of the country for being a time-traveling heathen who sleeps with celebrities and has super-powers. But check out this cool shit… you can move to anywhere else in the world!

this is.. not a questionalthough it is a wonderful scenario

33. The Celestial Gates Of Beyond have opened, much to your surprise because you didn’t think such a thing existed. Death appears. As it turns out, Death is actually a pretty cool entity, and happens to be in a fantastic mood. Death offers to return the friend/family-member/person/etc. of your choice to the living world. Who will you bring back?

none of them bc if the celestial gates of the beyond is real then all the people i’d want to bring back are probably in a Better Place or something and why would i want to drag them to Hell?

34. What was your last dream about?

Cannot remember to save my life altho i kno it was rly weird and convoluted

35. Are you a good….[insert anything you’d like here]?

u did not put anything Here so i will Ignore

36. Have you ever been admitted to the hospital?

Nope

37. Have you ever built a snowman?

yAH it’s fun!

38. What is the color of your socks?

not wearing any

39. What type of music do you like?

A Lot

40. Do you prefer sunrises or sunsets?

Sunsets,,, evening is so nice mm m

41. What is your favorite milkshake flavor?

chocolate ayyyy

43. Do you have any scars?

a couple but like for Dumb Reasons

44. What do you want to be when you graduate?

I’ve graduated hs but i wanna be an animator when i decide which college to go to

45. If you could change one thing about yourself, what would it be?

my brain pls bartender can i have a Healthy One (correction to favorite word #4: fav word currently is deign)

46. Are you reliable?

i would like to think so

47. If you could ask your future self one question, what would it be?

are you happy?

48. Do you hold grudges?

YAH but only if i’ve been Pushed Too Far which is Pretty Damn Far by most ppls standards

49. If you could breed two animals together to defy the laws of nature, what new animal would you create?

none I am Not a God

50. What is the most unusual conversation you’ve ever had?

i have had So Many???? the most recent one was two times in a row random ppl i barely knew asked me for my netflix account bc they didnt have one and like…. bro what who R U,,,,, (i had literally only talked to the first guy once for ten minutes on fb)

51. Are you a good liar?

is the sky green? don’t think so

52. How long could you go without talking?

Very Long but like Only on Bad Weeks

53. What has been you worst haircut/style?

None my hair is Magnificent (idk)

54. Have you ever baked your own cake?

like birthday cake? never but i lov to bake cakes so like i bake myself cakes all the time

55. Can you do any accents other than your own?

i am so bad @ accents i can’t even Read in my Head in accents even though i know what the accent Should Sound Like

56. What do you like on your toast?

peanut butter and banan slices

57. What is the last thing you drew a picture of?

working on a picture of a tiger redraw

58. What would be you dream car?

a Bike bc i Do Not Like cars

59. Do you sing in the shower? Or do anything unusual in the shower? Explain.

i only sing in the shower when nobody is home (which is infrequent bc my mom is Always here) bc i am self conscious around most ppl but like Music,,,,, also when i was little i would pretend that i was standing in the rain all sad like in movies lmao

60. Do you believe in aliens?

yah

61. Do you often read your horoscope?

i follow an astrology blog and i read homestuck i mean,,

62. What is your favorite letter of the alphabet?

i??? A maybe bc there are a lot of ways to write it pretty idk but like specifically capital A ig

63. Which is cooler: dinosaurs or dragons?

Dragons they’re fire-breathing friends and i love them

64. What do you think about babies?

Gross

65. Freebie! Ask anything interesting you can think of.

U Didn’t put anything Here either so like how abt i give u a random fact abt myself that seems good my favorite bird is the lammergeier bc they’re basically irl dragons and they’re so pretty??? love them??? also i hate monkeys and apes esp chimpanzes bc they are scary and too much like humans to me i don’t like them

BOY that took way longer than i thought bc i had to feed my cat halfway thru and everything and like this is a Long Post sorry guys but ayyyyy this was fun thanks ari

[tobi-momo]

hey hey momo im gonna send this even though i know how little it probably helps. words do not feel like enough rn but im gonna try my best.

(you don't owe me a single thing. and i don't want you to feel like you even have to respond or even read this. do what you need to do for yourself)

wajawj insert readmore here ASHD I WISH I COULD DO THAT RN

momo i really don't have the words to express it, and i know how empty it can sound but you are incredible. i genuinely think that. i remember finding your blog in march (wait - dude, three months ago?) and it was because i was scrolling through the kageyama x reader tag and i saw this post. im not kidding i just read that and went 🥺 write it write it. im pretty sure that's how we met, and LITERALLy OH My GOSH imagine, me looking through for that specific tag at the specific time. imagine if you'd left off that tag that day. or i'd gotten cut off a few minutes before. but i did meet you, and i instantly began to associate your username with feeling safe and accepted and happy.

listen, i know how useless words, even ones you know are well-meant, can feel. i hope i don't sound like im assuming anything when im saying that i understand that you feel like words from someone you've only known a few weeks aren't really that important. i love you and i understand that you're probably going through a lot rn but the fact that me or anyone else is too doesn't mean we care less. our discord server? everyone there cares about you. we're always willing to listen, and although we might not see it right away your feelings and stuff going on in your life aren't less important than anyone else's. damn, momo, if there was anything i could do to make you feel better i would. just let me know. and please don't feel bad asking for help from me or isa or kaillei or anyone.

you must be so tired. you must be tired of putting up with shit and being the bigger person and trying so hard every day. of feeling like you're not good enough no matter how much effort you put into every day.

fuckk i wish i could say this and have it sound like it has the meaning that is behind it. it's just words in a tumblr ask. i know. but i'm on the other end, wishing with everything i have that i could help you more. you are so deserving of happiness and love and tobio kageyama's hugs and so much more.

i love you so much and i love you for your incredible heart. i love how hard working you are. and i promise from the bottom of my heart that you are enough and you don't have to push yourself to be enough. no one expects you to work yourself to the bone writing when you're not feeling the inspo. we want you to be happy. please keep doing what makes you happy. i loved the setter's help for many, many reasons (including kageyama's excellent characterization and him being the cutest human being ever and also y/n's determination and the whole time me fangirling over your fantastic writing) but the main reason was because i could tell you, for the most part, really liked that story and enjoyed writing it. and that's all i want. i want you to do what makes you happy and take care of yourself. if we have to wait a year for the epilogue of the setter's help? sounds good. i'll grab my lawn chairs. if it's a decade? i'll reread it once a year and imagine an ending until then. you decide not to write it at all? great, i'm proud of you for making a decision that feels right for you. i know this isn't about TSH, but it's a small way for me to say i love you and you amaze me every single day.

help this got so long but i wanna say it again. i love you. i know this might not change your life or even encourage you a little, but i hope it does.

pls don't feel pressure to respond or anything !! i promise that, from here on out, nothing you ever do can make me love you less.

here's hoping none of this made you uncomfy. ILYA AGAIN AND IF YOU NEED A BREAK FROM ME OR ANYTHING JUST PLEASE DON'T HESITATE TO SAY SOMETHING. I WISH I COULD DO MORE.

LITERALLY I CANNOT SHUT UP ABOUT HOW MUCH I LOVE YOU OKAY GN

ELEK IM FUCKING CRYING- NO REALLY IM ACTUALLY CRYING WHAT DID I DO TO DESERVE YOU HOLY SHIT-

i have no words to express how thankful i am that you are in my life and that you even sent this bc holy god im- i just- *cries*

i love you sara, and thank you so much <333