#Andy deserves better btw

[angelofverdum]

Station 19 6x13

Ugh. I hate how this show is getting a little better. Enough to make me excited every Thursday.

I hope they wrap up this major camping in the season finale. It's getting annoying. He always has a speech ready to save the day, and I don't care, honestly.

The video that Dixon made was so dumb. Twitter would drag that edit to hell and back.

I knew Eli and Travis was happening. I think everybody knew, they had more chemistry than Andy and Eli.

Vic is a better person than me because I would have broken up with Theo right there in that office. What's wrong with him? Beckett is out. They are investigating his neighborhood. What else does he want?

Carina, Ben, and Miranda were so funny. This is what I mean when I say they need to relax a bit. Yes, the subject was hard, but they were a great comedic trio.

Carina's "Oh" when Ben said Ben Deluca had me dying.

I love that Ben and Miranda didn't give Carina a speech about love or marriage, she just realized by herself that she needs to give Maya another chance and she is ready.

And those scenes between Maya and Carina had me twirling my hair and kicking my feet.

This was so soft and probably scary for her. Carina probably didn't sleep that night looking at her wife. It was so easy to let her in.

I like the space between them because it means Maya is respecting Carina's space. But she could have taken off her watch, the ponytail, her bell? She even slept with her shirt tucked in and probably her boots on too. I know she is in bodyguard mode but c'mon. Not even a blanket?

Then Carina got her defences up and told Maya: thank you, bye. One thing about Carina she is going to walk away from Maya.

But I'm very confused about how time worked in this episode.

Maya was on shift in the last episode, then she left to find Carina at work. So she probably took the day off and wait for Carina to get off shift and that's why she was still in uniform in the morning.

But in the morning, Carina was off shift, and Maya had work again. Ben took a day off in this episode, so it was another day?

I know this show doesn't pay too much attention to this but logistics is what I do for a living so.

Carina is stronger than me cause if she smiles at me like that I'd fold so fast.

"I want you to win me back slowly."

"Carina Deluca, would you go on a date with me?"

This is sick. I love them so much. The way they look at each other 🥺.

I don't know what kind of sacrifice they did in the writer's room but thank you. They are fixing the mess they did last season.

The last scene with Dixon had me thinking about a lot of things:

1. Those pictures are a way to show Maya's growth and to close the plot. Because they totally forgot that Maya was right about them, and Sullivan treated her like she was insane. I don't think Maya is going back.

2. We have never seen Maya driving. I didn't even know she had a car. I've always thought she uses her bike to go to work.

3. I don't care what they show us Maya has a Jeep. But when they go out they take Carina's car, even tho Maya is a better driver.

4. A lot of people still want a false negative for a pregnancy test she took 300 years ago. No, I know doctors are the worst patients, and Carina has been through a lot this season, but she would have noticed that something different with her body. They fix the relationship, and then they could try for a baby again.

5. Bring Back Maya's little backpack. I don't like this new bag.

[halucynator]

END OF 2023

sorry to anyone who didn't want to be tagged xx

hi! most of you will know me as lucy (unless you're @m3ntallyunstable34 and know my real name lol)

so yes, i am lucy. and this is me reflecting on 2023 on tumblr because it seems like a logical thing to do considering this year sucked like 20% less (one of us is lying reference) because of all my amazing online friends. so yes i guess in a way this is a mutual appreciation post 🫶

@berryzxx you wouldn't believe me when i tell you you were the first mutual i didn't have to be all professional and got to be a crazy bitch with lmao so thank you for not judging me and talking to me like we're besties (we totally are btw bc i said so) mwahh

@longlivestv the loml literally owe my life to you bee 🫶🫶 you are one of the main reasons i'm friends with all of the people i will mention after, so tysm and thank you for being so sweet to me and i love flirting with you /hj ilysm 💗 also if im too young to fall in love why do you keep running through my brain? 😍😍

@loserdiaz one of the very few people i get to openly talk to and not feel weird doing it akshdasjhd ilysm april <33 and youre one of the only people i will ever admit has better pick up lines than me (thats a huge honour btw) so thank you for keeping up with me and flirting with me it makes me feel very special mwahhh and ily and we should totally snuggle by the fireplace you know i made those cookies you like (sab reference) 😍🫶

@weeping-in-the-willows thank you for being the absolute SWEETEST person to me <3 ilysm and btw you were my first discord friend and i'm so honoured about that ajshdnjfe you're so nice and ily and i hope you get everything you want

@theladyinwhite13 thank you for appreciating my unhinged comments and you're one of the few people who deserve to be told that they are funnier than me (i rarely ever give anyone this honour btw so its very special) and i think you might appreciate this reference 'so what if i just wanna be a little out of my mind'

@bodybetters and @its-tortle karo and tortle my beloved <3 ilysm you're like two of the BEST mutuals ever and i was so honoured happy excited (any other positive adjective) when i realised you followed ME back?!? i was literally so ajshdnjfe i can't even put it in words you're like my favourite people on this hellsite (affectionate)

@suugarbabe ajdhhgajsgf my pookie <33 you always stand up for me and ilysm for it youre the nicest to me what did i ever do to deserve you 😭❤️

@patrophthia omg the absolute sweetestt!! youre an angel and ilysm and i hope you have the best life every <33 ilysm thank you for being so nice to me and making me feel valued asjdhajksd i love youu

@theautistmwitch omg idk how youre still sane after hearing to my traumatising jokes 😭 ilysm mwahh❤️thank you for being so sweet to meee it makes me so happy <333 can't wait to traumatise- uh i mean make you laugh even more next year!

@kurtcobainsgreencardigan ajkshdad i had the time of my life 'bullying' [insert their name] (i dont wanna get cancelled yk just in case people actually like them) with you <33 [i mean you technically didn't 'bully' them but we bonded over that] you're so funny and sweet and ily<3

@catastrxblues nadine the loml <33 i LOVED chatting with you and ranting to you and reading your answers to my asks akgdskg im so glad to have you as a mutual and i would love to have some more ranting convos with you in the future haha asdhjhajsh ilysm mwahh <3

@nyctophile-me omg you're so sweet to meee 😭😭😭 ily you're like one of my favourite wives too you're one of the only people i will ever share sab with mwah ❤️❤️ id love to talk to you more next year <3

@magicandmaybe @andi-is-bored @alltheliars and @animallover4000 omg you're all so sweet and ily and we didn't really interact a lot this year but i loved chatting with you on discord 💕

@imperpetuallylost omg ilyy you're so unintentionally (or intentionally?) funny ahsjdnfne and i guess it's inevitable sorry sky but it looks like you (lea not sky) deserve to [redacted] goosebot and it's well deserved ajsjdjdne ily and id love to interact more with you next year <33

@london-affairs literally started talking to you like 5 days ago and we were flirting non stop that's CRAZYYYY ily btw pookie 😍

@m3ntallyunstable34 my literal best friend!! i absolutely love you mwah mwah mwah thank you for being my best friend and dealing with me for 12 years llama im shocked you're not insane yet ahsjsj ilyyyy ❤️

these are the mutuals that made me throw my phone across the room and scream in excitement when i realised THEY followed ME

also i will take this moment to thank all of you for making my year amazing and i love you all so much and i hope you have THE BEST 2024. thank you so much for being a part of my crazy blog i would never have imagined 438 people would find this silly little blog 🫶

@cassiopeiasdaughter @faultsline @underthenightskydreamsneverdie @theostrophywife @slytherinslut0 @imperpetuallylost @themidnightarcher @stvrlighhttt @psychedeliccc @prettybaby-grande @nqds @themidnightarcher @i-miss-you-im-sorry @cottoncandywhispers @svnflowermoon @finalgirllx @fallingforfictionalcharacterss @ashisgreedy @moonffe @suugarbabe @wordsarelife and @xobridgertonblues (i might've tagged some people twice sorryyyy)

[gayspock]

ehrmmmmmmmmmm

qhwat is it a ploy to make sense for once i dont know but notihng works nothing ever works and feelsfucking crazy and people alwas just say the same shit to you over and over again until all your faces are blue and they dont lsiten its ironicits so easy its so so easy just talk topeople andi think of all the times ivedonethat in any type of fucking context and how thigns dont seem todo anything but make me feel bad or to make everyr single fucking situation drastically fucking wors e . do this do that the professional helpmakes ti worse every time its a nigghtmar etrying to do anyhting makes it worse everything is unfeasible and impossiblethats wh y . you cant say oh its os fucking hopeless even when it is i woudl be fuckingfine with it if there seven something i could fcking nearly fucking try but what is there tell me i thinkim nver going to get that answer i know imbeing fucking childish for the million fucking platitudes, the "theres alwyas hope"s and "it gets better"s wher eisit . what caniactually do and why am i sitll alive when there no sense to it and no oens ever had a serious fucking answe r to that because there is none and nothing will ever woek cuz there is no solution and im not crazy or mentally ill im just fucking . reasponding rationally. like yes fucking kill yourself its what makes sense . what els eis there to doifeel nuts i feel alone i am alone dont care again its the platitudes is liek i genuinely fucking want to punch people it jsut feels mean and its fucking horrible how youre meant to take it or youre the cunt and you deserve whar you fucking get butfuck me man fuck me do you ever wonder for the ten billionthings its just nasty as shit to hear . something something you can do something you can go somewhere but whatisthere theres nothing and for allthe time syoure told youre not alone but thats all you ever hear some surfacelevelk bullshit, and when it comes down to it what happens when its real whathappens when its actualwhat happens ifeel ufcking sick i just feel like crying because people cant even say more than that. do you kno w what i mean. i say platitudes i mean its clinicalitsnothing its everything in a greeting dcard i hatehearing it but i dont matter enough for that to count becauseits whatever itnever makes sense it never applies to you you can just slip out of itim trying not to be mean im triyng not to be acunt how itshard fuck me because its no one elses fault its on no one elseand no one else is ever goingtocare so why is it eer pertinent becauseat what else is there to say theres nothing to say or do its as i said its the right ufcking answe r the only thing there ever is going tobe and sometimesyes i wish someone coul d ucking help me and chang emy mind but i thinkthat wuld just be me being a differnet persn amognst howufckingimpossible it is and i jsut .

my otherhting im goingcrazy btw wakeup go to work i cantsleep at night what happensin the inbetween but fuckignd read and sickness and fuckingspinning your wheels i suck at work im stupi d andi dont think they take me seriously and wat hten its over and youre at hoe and im alone andi exist there ijn the most corporeal form andits patheitc and ic omehome and its wosre ijm so so so fuckign tired i i endup hating everything i start going nuts i regret it everyday i regret not fucking diynghwen i was younger and i cantunderstand wat was going through my fucking srtupid head to ever fucking believe anything woudlever work out because i KNEW then and I KNEW it badly bt i just fucking loh my godd does anyone els ehate themsleves i fuckign hate everything i do and i fucking hate triyng to pretend i dont and i fuckinghate being told not to when thats just the fucking reality of it like why why do i changethat i tryto change it genuienly but if thatswhat it is im not going to lie tomyself i cant i fucking cant and eveyrbone else keeps lying to me and I FEEEEEL CRAZYYYYYYYY DO YOU UUUUUIM GOING TO GO HAVE ANOTHER EDIBLEEE BECAUSE THIS CLEARLYISNT WORKINGGGGGGGG TONIGHTTTTT

[jakowskis]

Day 21 - Discuss Gwen. Opinions? Favorite moment? Least favorite moment? Any unpopular opinions? Any fun headcanons?

gwen!!! i love gwen. i think she’s fascinating. she’s normal - she’s fucked up. she’s empathetic - she detaches from the people closest to her. she loves rhys - she loves jack. she knew torchwood was toxic - she joined anyway. she’s just a really fleshed out, grounded character, akin to some of the doctor who companions imo, but because it’s torchwood she gets to be a little more of a straight up asshole - i love it. i think she’s a brilliant character. and she’s also adorable and funny and badass and gorgeous and sweet and lovely and a little bit deranged. i adore her. 

my fav gwen moment would have to be when she retconned rhys in combat 😭 HEAR ME OUT. that’s the moment i was like ‘oh holy shit she’s fucked up’ and that made me feel compelled by her... she’s since become my second fav character and i think if that scene didn’t exist she wouldn’t have reached that point for me. esp because it established her as a certain type of fucked up, you know? her cheating on rhys wasn’t nice, but it was interesting. i think her struggles with emotional faithfulness and how easily she was pushed into sexual infidelity from stress and isolation make her interesting. her and owen are psychological marvels to me, in the best way fshdfkjds they’re both really fascinating characters with really interesting and, bafflingly, well-done trauma responses. listen, i like rhys a lot, and i pity him, but my main issue with that plot is less that she did it in the first place and more that that plotline was never given closure. i don't rlly have much interest in condemning cheating as it exists in fiction, it's just a plot device to me so it doesn't register as particularly immoral when done by characters (as in, it doesnt make ME hate them; i know some people think it's a Grave Sin) - but i do think rhys did deserve better than never being offered transparency in that regard. but i don’t blame gwen herself for that, so much as i blame the writers.

and then aside from that, i have several fav gwen-being-cute moments, because she’s like a fluffy little creature to me fhsdkj there’s something about eve’s tooth gap i think and the way they do her hair, and those big ol’ eyes…. i want to keep her in my pocket. i love the handful of times her and owen goof off, i love her crying pizza scene, i love the scenes where she’s being playful with rhys, i love her reactions when she's talking to emma about sex in out of time (eve’s comedic acting is so funny too btw like some of the faces gwen makes at shit kills me. shes just so tangible she looks and feels like a real person you’d be friends w like thts gwen my friend gwen)... i love the way she bonds with female characters, idk why that was something that really stood out to me like she way she bonds with other women, i love it. with jonah’s mom and with beth... in an era where women were pitted against each other a lot (we see it happen w her n tosh in, like, countrycide a little), it's nice they subverted that. i love when women take care of each other. nice little thing to include in tw of all shows.

my least favorite gwen moment… i can’t really think of one of the top of my head? OH i know. the way she treats andy in adrift bothered me a bit. i think the concept of ‘torchwood’s changed you, you’re crueler now’ is brilliant, but it’s a little more personal between them, and she's unnecessarily a bit condescending w him, so it rubbed me a little wrong. but torchwood in s1 were meant to be cocky so ig maybe that could've rubbed off on her too... but the show doesn't suggest that so eh.

i don’t think i have any unpopular opinions, other than i think she’s a great character + she’s very likeable and compelling, and i think gwen bashers are misogynistic morons ❤️ oh also! i think she’s just as bisexual as the other three, she’s just not as tapped into her attraction to women. gwen to me is a “when i was a kid i used to stare at my best friend and think about how pretty she was… but that’s normal right i mean thats just loving your friend right. feeling warm when you brush her hair at a slumber party is normal right” type of wlw fsdkjfd. i think she emotionally latches onto women (like i said we see this happen in the show) but she’s just gone through life assuming she’s straight so she never clocked herself as having the capacity for that emotional attachment to be something romantic instead. not unlike pre-gbg tosh.

fun headcanons… her and owen are besties. this is canon as far as im concerned but i’d like it to be even More. they just sort of have a surprisingly easy rapport, like they enjoy each other's company (somewhat surprisingly, given their contrasting personalities) and are weirdly in sync esp in s2, but they also poke and prod at each other. they have a shiv & roman from succession relationship to me - “hey slut” “hey f-g” HFSDKJFHDKJ do you see. do u see my vision. (not the sibling shit obviously just That Vibe.) i love writing them bantering back n forth, it's tons of fun. also lowkey projecting shit from the actors onto them - eve used to just straight up wrestle burn and that feels like a gwen owen activity i think she should pick him up and slam dunk him into the ground. theyre boygirlbesties to me i think they should go shopping together and try shit on and insult each other. i think they should go to more movies n sit in the back n whisper back n forth. i also think gwen and tosh should be closer as well im sending them on a spa trip. girl’s night! oh speaking of girl’s night ive also had this fic in development for a while about owen playing with gender (i think he needs that i think it’d heal him) + it has two separate scenes where gwen puts makeup on him cuz i think they should recreate that lesbian makeup image. thats their relationship to me. i also think she should peg him platonically. do u kinda see the vibe im going for here. speaking of pegging… shit that needs to be introduced into her relationship w rhys. female characters who i’d fix by buying them a strap-on. also she needs to have gay sex it’s crucial. ok ill shut up now. idk if i have any other non-cursed hcs HKSDF sorry im evil xD ill show myself out. gwen cooper they could never make me hate you i love you mwah!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[tarabyte3]

No question, just wanted you to know that you're lovely and talented and I hope you're doing ok (hopefull better than ok, you deserve it). ❤️

This is so fucking sweet and I appreciate it so much that every time I look at it, I start crying. Thank you for checking up on me 💖😭 I am struggling to find words to express how much it means to me.

So I am going to use this answer to post an update for everyone.

Short answer: I'm not doing great.

BUT I believe that anyone who is able and willing to share their mental health journey should. Both to normalize the struggle AND so that anyone else quietly going through the same thing doesn't feel so alone or as though it's their fault. Because it isn't our fault! We don't deserve this, and it's cruel our own brains tell us we do.

Also getting it out is just therapeutic sometimes!

Therefore the long answer under the cut.

CW: discussion of mental health and depression

I want to preface this with: I'm safe. I have no intrusive or physically harmful thoughts. 💖

But I'm really struggling. I feel like shit most of the time. Mentally, emotionally, and physically.

The winter blues have me in a chokehold and are preventing me from doing things that I enjoy doing to help me feel better.

When you're depressed, it can be difficult to do basic tasks. It can feel impossible to do things like self-care, exercise, or to work on creative projects.

I thrive on creative projects. I need enrichment in my enclosure!! When I don't have them or can't do them, it makes me feel actively worse.

I haven't been able to work on my fic because right now my brain is an undercooked scrambled egg in a mesh colander. I get about 100 words out (I'm at ~2.5k words for this next chapter, which is about half done, I would guess) and then I just stare blankly at my screen. Which sucks because I have the vision for what I want to write in my head (😏), but no way to get it to come out of my brain.

(Side note: thank god for gif making and Andy content because it's the one thread keeping me from bolting into the woods, never to return)

I also have a few home decor, painting, and craft projects I could work on, but I lack motivation due to depression.

It's just an ouroboros of "depressed so I can't be creative" and "need to be creative so I'm not depressed." 🙃

We're getting wave after wave of winter weather here (right now we're in a massive ice storm), which is keeping me indoors. Being cooped up is rough on me. I need to be active. I'm just a complicated houseplant—probably a calathea as we are both drama queens.

I'm also finding it difficult to exercise due to: you guessed it! The sads. My beloved rowing machine, stationary bike, treadmill, and yoga mat sit neglected.

I am also eating far too much bread. Which, while immediately satisfying, is unfortunately not a long term solution because it's actively contributing to me feeling worse 😂

I reached out to try and find a personal trainer to help with the lack of motivation, get me out of the house, have a routine, AND get some workout endorphins to kickstart my healthy habits back into gear, but I haven't heard a single thing back from any of them. Which is disheartening.

Especially since another fun symptom of depression is feeling completely fucking alone and ignored. Which is rude AF, btw.

I'm going to keep making Andy gifs and crossing my fingers that the weather lets up so I can leave the house. Maybe go to some thrift and antique stores or a plant store. That always makes me feel better!

So other than some far more personal struggles with having a chronically ill teenager, there you have it!

I appreciate all of you for helping keep me sane and connected, even though I haven't been logging on as much as I had been due to being too busy staring at a wall and contemplating whether or not I should eat more bread. (I should NOT. …or should I?)

Truly. Thank you. 💕🥹🥺

[favroitecrime]

modern family will ALWAYS piss me off with the whole haley x dylan thing. them together and as individuals was such a train wreck. haley regresses so much when she’s with dylan and ik it’s played as comedy that dylan got into nursing school but come on. andy was right there!! i know the original reason was because his actor for booked and couldn’t stay long but what stopped them then? if only have him come in and out and not every episode? back to haley and dylan, they were a terrible match from the second they were introduced. they’re not good for each other at all and it remains disturbing how they dated when haley was still 15/16 when dylan had already turned 18/19. he was dating a minor and that was never an issue and it pisses me off!! haley fucks up a lot but i will say she deserved so much better than dylan and i hate how the show doesn’t give her (or alex, but that’s another post) the life she deserves with the potential that not only did she have, but the potential they built up to. anyways yeah i still love this show btw 9/10 would recommend very fun but def has its flaws

[lesbianpepsi]

Yeh. She's basically non-existent on social media now, but I'm glad her and her...husband-boyfriend(?) finally had a family together. Idk if they got married or not. I think they did, I remember a photo of her and Andy, I think his name was, at the wedding, but I could be wrong.

I hope Pat gets a better streak in life soon. He deserves that much. The dude has been through so much horseshite the past 3 years. Oh! Btw I got my laptop back today from the repair dude. It was broken for about a week, but I can finally write more of my Scream fic!! Ghostface Sam shall return!!

wohoooo!! that's awesome my dude, glad you got your laptop back.

yeah i hope the best of them :(

[popchoc]

Btw, I really like (like: like like) that British dude, so he'd better is as charming as he seems (read: not shady), cause I'm a 100% sure he's gonna end up with my girl (yes, we reached that stage) Andy, who deserves some nice things for a change!

[shiorinotshiori]

You can't stop me now, not like you did before (Eddie Munson x F!Reader)

You discovered the reason why Eddie broke up with you.

And you also find out that he still comes to basketball games, just to watch you cheer.

Part 1: You looked so good in green OG Ending: Finally Home

Warnings: Swearing, very slight violence, mentions of blood, Jason ugh

Notes: ' ' means it is the characters' inside thoughts

IDK HOW TO EDIT ON MY PHONE BUT I FORGOT TO SAY THAT ELLIOT'S AN OC BTW!! Hwbshsh

Word count: 3.3k

Request: "If there is a part two I will give anything to see y/n corner eddie and lay out that she still loves him and wants to be with him. Then when he starts the “you deserve better” she gets all “stop trying to make choices for me! I can make my own choices and my choice is YOU!” And then there is crying and probably making out under the bleachers" a/n: I did some changes hope thats ok! n sorry if this isn't what u expect ahghahd but yeah i didn't know if an 'under' exists in Hawkins High's bleachers so i changed the scene to hallways

I don't give permission to repost or translate my work please have mercy

It’s been months for both Eddie and you, but even so, the long haired ‘freak’ never seem to leave your mind. He’s been there since the day you met him, and even after the break-up, he was still there. It’s like Eddie’s been living in your head, rent-free; he made it his little home when he first gave you his shirt. You never understood Eddie’s change of mind regarding your relationship- yes, you knew his insecurities crept once in a while, but it never got to the point that he thought about breaking up with you. Before, it was never an option for Eddie. If there was a solution to his thoughts, it was always to fix his path but never leave you- at least that was until the ‘party’ thing; which you never knew about.

You spent days thinking about what had happened, that can’t be the only reason why you separated and left the most precious thing you had. For almost two years, you were attached to each other- as if one couldn’t live without the other. So why?

Little did you know you were about to find out soon.

The popular crowd arranged another get-together-event, just for the sake of partying and drinking and getting drunk- a.k.a, the usual. You needed something to distract yourself from the man who wouldn’t leave your mind so… you went, thinking that for a moment, you’d be able to forget and blur the painful memory of your last talk with Eddie. Ever since the separation, you never got the chance to talk with him again. Not when he kept avoiding you like the plague. At least that’s what you thought.

You and the other cheerleaders, along with the jocks, were hanging out in Andy’s house. You guys were upstairs, sat in a circle- just exchanging remarks to others’ story. You were not relating to any conversation that was going around in your circle, you stood up from where you were sitting. “Hey, I’m gonna go get drinks. Anyone want some?” you offered, hoping to get a very short time alone in the kitchen. “Ah, can I get a beer?” Jason raised his hand to get your attention, making sure you get him what he’s asking for. You only nodded back because it seems like he’s the only one who wanted to drink more.

You silently walked down the stairs, immediately making your way towards the refrigerator. Grabbing two more drinks, you went and rested yourself by the counter. You were slowly breathing in and out, getting that much needed air you were craving for while seated with people you don’t even like. Except for maybe Chrissy and Elliot. You just stood there, thinking being alone would help you but, as the silence continues- you just find your mind wondering back to a certain person. ‘Wish I was with Eddie instead’ you thought. God knows how much you miss silent times with Eddie. Believe it or not, Eddie can shut his mouth sometimes. He isn’t exactly as loud as he is whenever he’s with the Hellfire. There were times he enjoyed just laying on his bed, with his arms wrapped around you, staring at the trailer’s dirty ceiling.

As much as you dreaded to return to people who you only pretend to like, you had no other choice- you wanted a distraction and this was just it. Again, you silently walked up the stairs, hearing them laugh. You thought they were just laughing at each other’s stories again but, you stopped halfway when you heard a name. A name that never left you to find peace. “-Eddie.”

You knew that maybe it was just the usual ‘bring other’s down so we can feel better about ourselves’ thing that popular people tend to do. But no, you didn’t expect to find answers that explains the sudden break-up between you and Eddie. “Right! Like, I thought after our little talk with the freak, he’s still gonna swallow up his pride and stay with (Y/N). But, I guess we got it thru his head that they don’t belong together.” You heard a girl say.

“Wait- wait, so can you actually describe what happened? You talked? With the freak?” It was Andy’s turn to question, evident to his tone that he was frowning. Quickly followed by Jason, answering instead “Nah, we just went and explained that maybe… (Y/N) deserved better, ya know? Not that we actually care but, we can’t have OUR kind having connections, romantic or friendly, connections with the outcasts. It will ruin us! And I believe, we did (Y/N) a favor. She was once a lost soul, and we just saved her ass from being sacrificed to the devil.” There’s that joke, that running joke about Eddie being Satan’s disciple. If only they knew that Eddie’s better than all of them, not that they will ever admit that- but at least some people knew. You knew.

After hearing them laugh at your ex, it made you sick in the stomach. How could you ever thought that maybe you’d get along with them one day? Once again, you were so wrong about the people in Hawkins. Some people just don’t deserve a second chance.

It felt like ages before you realized what was happening- THEY were the reason why Eddie broke up with you. You were angry, no, you were furious. You could go up to them now, maybe even slap Jason’s smug face off, but you couldn’t. Deep inside you knew that wouldn’t be ideal, at least not for now. Your last game to cheer on, is in two days. You couldn’t find it in yourself to ruin (almost) everyone’s favorite event in Hawkins High, because if you confront them now- it’s for sure that hell will break loose. You were not that selfish, unlike those people. So, you decided to play pretend again, pretend you actually tolerate their kind. Then after the game, you’ll tell them to go fuck themselves. That was your plan.

You waited for another minute to pass before fully going upstairs, greeting them with one of your fake smiles. “Hi! Sorry I took so long to get our drinks, Jason. It’s just that uh… my mom called. She said she wanted me back like uh… right now. Says she needs me for something. So uh, sorry I have to go home early.” You almost threw the canned beer at Jason’s face, but you managed to refrain yourself from doing so. ‘Not today (Y/N), the day will come’ you promised yourself. You’d make him pay one of these days.

“You need a ri-“ before Elliot finished his sentence, you were down and running towards the door. You were still upset and didn’t want anyone near you, not even the most tolerable person in the basketball team.

You spent the remaining days, before the game, thinking on how you’d approach Eddie. Now that you knew, you want- NEED to talk to him. You were not gonna let this go so easy, not like the first time you thought Eddie’s deciding for himself. He was just provoked by some asshole who thinks he runs the whole school. You couldn’t let Eddie go, not again. Not after what you heard. You hoped that there was still a chance. You think that maybe you can convince Eddie that you don’t want anyone but him.

It’s finally game day. You never thought the day would come that you’d be wearing contacts. These past few days, with what you learned- plus your eye sight demanding for a better vision; gave you massive headaches. So, your mom convinced you to try and give contacts a second chance, hoping it would lessen your headaches too.

It’s game day, also your final cheer in Hawkins. You gave it your all, cheering and dancing your heart out. Of course, you didn’t know but, as usual- Eddie sat in the darkest corner. He couldn’t miss your last performance, he couldn’t miss the last time he’d be able to see you like this.

You were still standing near the bleachers after your routine, trying to get used to the contacts by looking far ahead of you. And that’s when you locked eyes with someone. That someone being the one and only Eddie Munson. What he didn’t expect, was to lock eyes with you. ‘Fuck! Is she staring at me? No, no, couldn’t be’ Eddie thought, he was confident you wouldn’t be able to see him. With his eyes still wide, he tried to look elsewhere, slightly scratching the back of his neck, pretending he didn’t just catch your gaze.

You felt a familiar lump in your throat, the same lump that kept hunting you for months of trying not to cry- about the guy who’s now acting oblivious in front of you. “Eddie…?” you whispered only to yourself, still not believing that he came to watch you again. Call yourself assuming but, you knew Eddie never had a reason to go to a basketball game before you. You were frozen at the spot, your eyes following the man’s retreating figure. Wait… retreating figure? You then realized that Eddie’s making his way down the bleachers, trying to desperately get away from you, again. Sitting at the last column made it easier for Eddie to go down and straight out the doors leading to the hallway.

You quickly ran towards the same door that Eddie wen thru. There was no time to waste, this was your chance, maybe the only chance you’d get to talk to Eddie again. You reached the hallway and saw Eddie’s back turned to you, he was resting an arm against one of the lockers. Eddie’s heart was racing so fast, not from the way he quickly ran to avoid you but, from the fact that you just saw him. ‘She saw me holy fuc-‘ his thoughts soon interrupted by you, calling his name. “Jesus Christ!” His arm that was resting- separated from the locker when his whole body literally jumped, spooked when you spoke. That’s another thing he didn’t expect, he didn’t expect you to follow him. So, hearing you almost scared him to death; aside from the fact that he got surprised by your voice, it was none other than YOUR voice.

He had no other choice but to face you- he had been wishing to see your face up close again but, not this way. Not when he didn’t know what to tell you now that you’re near him. Eddie never thought he’d talk to you, maybe if he did knew, he would’ve at least practiced some lines in front of the mirror.

“HI! No wait- I didn’t mean for that to come off so… aggressive…” he trailed off. ‘Yeah man, way to go Eddie’ he silently cursed. It’s been months okay, he didn’t know how to act around you anymore. You slowly came closer, swallowing before asking “Why… why were you at the game?” you just needed an answer before fully committing into telling him you now knew why he broke your relationship off.

“I uh… like basketball?” Eddie had never been a good liar, he was also aware of that. So, before you could reply and comment on his obvious lie- he just said the first thing that came into mind “You sure your boyfriend wouldn’t mind you talking to me?” now that shocked you, where the hell did Eddie got that idea?

“Wha- Boyfriend?! Eddie what are you talking about?”

“Oh, you know, the guy you hugged last game?” He scoffed, remembering the bitter sight he saw last time he went to watch you.

“Last game? Who did I hug last gam- You mean Elliot?! Wait! LAST GAME? You were also there?” At this point, you were flabbergasted. Eddie might have accidentally admitted that he’s been watching the recent games and it gave you the little tiniest bit of hope.

“Oh wow! Also an E- didn’t know you had a type (Y/N).” Eddie cocked his head to the side, saying it with pure sarcasm while smiling- a smile that’s not an indication of happiness. You did NOT expect that this will be your first conversation after months and it irritated you. “Eddie, me and Elly are not-“

“AND a nickname too! That sounds just like my name! This is great, so fantastic, sweetheart!” Eddie’s jealousy turned into frustration, an obvious one, as he raised both of his arms, bent in a way you’d think he was shrugging but that’s just Eddie letting out his frustration with his dramatic expressions. “Will you please stop cutting me off?! You didn’t give me a chance to talk last time! Now, I’m the one who’s gonna talk and you better listen to me Edward!” You’ve had enough of Eddie’s attitude, now it’s your turn to corner him against the lockers and tell him everything.

“Me and that guy you’re jealous of- are nothing BUT friends. I hugged him because he’s the only guy I felt comfortable with after you left me and avoided me as if I had some type of- some type of disease! I couldn’t even go near the Hellfire club! You avoided me like you hate me so much but then watch me in what? In every god fucking game there is after we broke up! I don’t understand what you want me to do Eddie. You’ve left me confused!” This felt familiar, but now the roles were reversed. You were now the one leaving Eddie speechless. Your eyes were hurting and your vision’s all blurry. Tears in your eyes made the contacts burn but you didn’t care. You were pouring your heart out to Eddie.

“Why? Why didn’t you just tell me that Jason and his stupid- his stupid friends told you something that made you decide for the both of us?” You were trying to choke out the words but, it was getting harder for you to talk. Beyond your tears, you saw Eddie looked down in shame for a moment, his fingers fiddling with his rings- a nervous mannerism of Eddie that you learned when you were dating.

He finally looked up to you, his own eyes filling with tears. “Because they were right (Y/N)! You deserve be-“

“Enough with the I deserve better bullshit Eddie! That’s not your decision to make, that was supposed to be MY choice and you took-“ You started accusingly pointing your index finger on Eddie’s chest “-you took that away the moment you broke up with me. You know damn well that my choice is always gonna be you. It’s always gonna be you Eddie. You can’t stop me now, not like you did before. Because I still love you, and I know you still love me too unless you miraculously started liking basketball that’s why you-“

And the moment you and Eddie were waiting for, happened. To feel each other’s lips again. Your hand that was tapping against Eddie’s chest was stopped by his own hand. He was holding yours to his chest, near his heart, as if to let you know that you were still the beat of it. Eddie’s eyes were closed but yours were surprised. His free arm snaked around your waist to pull you closer, tightening it each second, afraid to ever let you go again.

His tongue licked your lower lip, asking permission to enter. That’s when you closed your eyes and brought him closer- if that was even still possible. While your tongue moved with Eddie’s- he gently pressed your back against the lockers, his kiss was getting a bit aggressive; making up for the months he wasted moping around instead of doing this with you. Finally, both of you were out of breath.

Eddie rested his forehead against yours, last time he did, it did not end well- but this time? It was a new beginning as he said “ ‘Course I still love you sweetheart. What can I say? It was my mistake for letting you go. I- I never should’ve listened to those assholes, now I just wasted time that was supposed to be ours. Sorry, princess. Let me make it up to you?” Other people would assume that Eddie could never be defined as ‘soft’ and ‘gentle’- but this was your Eddie. He’s handling you like a fragile object against him as he hugged both of his arms around, resting his chin on top of your head.

With your faced pressed on his chest, you managed to mumble out “You already did, Eddie. Now, promise me we’ll leave together? For real this time?” You felt the vibration of his “MmHmm.”

He moved to gently lift your chin with his finger, one of his cold rings brushing on you, as he looked down to meet your eyes. “You think that- after that hot make out sesh in the middle of the hallway… I’m letting you go?” He chuckled “Yeah, no can do, sweetheart. I, guarantee you, that you’re now stuck- again- with Eddie the Banished!” There he goes again with his dramatic monologues, you thought but- it only made you smile as you look up to him, admiring him while posing like a total nerd- fist closed, arm extended up in the air with the other arm wrapped around you.

You were about to lean in and kiss him again when the doors to your right burst open, loud victorious screams were heard before it stopped, ‘Oh righhhht, the game’ which both you and Eddie totally forgot- now you’ve got the rest of the cheerleaders and the basketball team staring at the both of you; in a very promising position.

“(Y/N)? What the fuck? Is this freak bothering you again?” Jason stepped forward, ready to show his friends that he’s gonna be the ‘hero’ of the day again. “Actually no, I don’t think my boyfriend, will ever bother me. What ya’ think Eddie?”

“No, no, I don’t think I do bother you, sweetheart. Considering that we just finished MAKING OUT in the HALLWAY” Eddie made sure to emphasize the words ‘making out’ and ‘hallway’ which made you laugh. And, the look of your former teammates was priceless. It’s just the usual disgusted looks but, it was better than their fake smiles and greetings.

“You’re throwing your life away (Y/N), You’re really gonna go back to this los-“ a girl started but immediately gasped when you held your middle finger up to her. “Yes, and I, quit. I mean, it was the last game but yeah. Go fuck yourselves!” You held a sweet but sarcastic smile. Your hand making its way towards Eddie’s, to intertwine them.

As you walk away from the crowd, “You fre-!” You and Eddie heard Jason started, so you turn around, ready to deal with another drama scene when you saw Jason had his fist up in the air, ready to swing at Eddie- when someone punched Jason hard. On the face. His nose bleeding. Oh shit it’s bleeding. “That’s what you get for being an asshole, you had it coming mate. Not sorry.” You looked at Elliot, who punched Jason by the way. You mouthed a silent ‘thank you’ to him. Elliot nodded to both Eddie and you- before walking to the opposite direction. Also leaving the toxic people behind.

You were able to breathe again, finally that’s over. “Hey… sorry for the accusation earlier. I was just, y’know, kind of jealous? But he’s cool, he’s cool.” Eddie shyly admitted, you smiled at your boyfriend, taking his fidgeting hands. “S’kay, at least I got you back now.” You continued to walk down the hallway with Eddie, hands still together.

Eddie then asked you a question he’s been meaning to ask since you two made up. “So, princess… since we’re uhm, together again…”

“What is it, Eddie?”

“Can the fair maiden, join me, in today’s Hellfire campaign?” Eddie smiled as he heard you squeal from excitement. He sure missed his favorite player and you with your one and only dungeon master.

You were so glad to have him back, now stronger than ever. Eddie will never make the same mistake again, not when you showed him everyday that you needed him as much as he needed you.

You never deserved better, because Eddie Munson was the best.

_________________________________________

Here's your request! @stormcellarwitch hope you liked it <3

[aramblingjay]

Headcanons of kelly being over protective of Matt and Matt is a flushed mess and has a grin on his face

I love all of your headcanons BTW !!!

Thank you!!

Protective!Kelly is one of my favorite things, here are some thoughts:

Matt doesn’t need anyone protecting him, he makes that abundantly clear when he lays Ted Griffin out with one well-aimed punch. Griffin doesn’t dare shoot his mouth off again while they’re at the Academy, but that’s his friend Griffin messed with—Kelly doesn’t let that go lightly. He ropes Andy, who’s all too eager, into a little revenge mission with him, and Griffin finds two of his tires slashed the next morning (two, because nobody has two spares). Griffin’s late to drills and gets a dressing-down from their instructor that’s a thing of beauty

Almost as beautiful as the way Matt turns around from the front row to give Kelly a half-scandalized, half-vindictively-pleased grin, with a look in his eyes that screams I can’t believe you did that. The for me tacked on to the end is loud and clear, and that’s what bothers Kelly—Matt’s surprise, like he didn’t expect anyone to exact some revenge on his behalf, like it never even occurred to him that now he has friends who will

So no, Matt doesn’t need anyone protecting him. But he sure as hell deserves someone to have his back, and Kelly is more than happy to step up. Nobody messes with his little brother

It’s a thing after that

Matt gets a little soot on his face during a bad fire and Kelly will single-handedly death glare him into going to the hospital, and stare down every doctor and nurse until they tell him, with absolute certainty, that there’s no airway compromise. Everyone at Med is more than used to this, and share conspiratorial smiles with a fondly resigned Matt, who indulges Kelly in this the way he would nobody else

It’s a bit of a nightmare when Casey is Alderman. Politics is all about having thick skin, but Kelly doesn’t when it comes to Matt. He spends more than a few evenings pacing around ranting about some newspaper column on Casey being corrupt while Matt watches him from the sofa, more amused than anything else. (And when the mudslinging becomes more pointed and hits closer to home, brings up Matt’s past and questions his character in ways that make Kelly’s blood boil, he conveniently loses those editions of the Chicago Tribune because Matt deserves better than to have to read such intrusive, filthy lies about himself)

Matt gets a cold and it’s Kelly who comes over with bags and bags of soup and Tylenol and thermometers and four extra blankets (“because you’re cold on on a good day, Case, never mind now!”). Matt will spend a majority of the time insisting you really didn’t have to do all this, Sev, I’m fine, but he’ll smile when he eats the warm soup and laugh a little helplessly at the sheer number of blankets, and Kelly has never needed more of a reason than that

The other thing, is Kelly can’t help but call him Case when he’s being protective. Something about the nickname makes Matt melt and usually even blush a little, and Kelly loves it

[angelofverdum]

Station 19 6x18

Can Theo go? How more toxic can he be? Writers really said, "Oh you hate Sullivan? Let me show you someone worse". What an asshole. Making out with Kate just because Vic was proud of Andy. Who, mind you, is one of her closest friends and has been fighting for that position for a long time.

Captain Herrera, fucking finally. I hope that storyline ends there. We don't care about that anymore. She is going to be a great captain. Let her be captain until season 11, at least.

I wish we had seen a conversation between Maya and Andy about the captaincy.

Jack lost consciousness, so he couldn't tell Vic what he saw. If they kill Jack, I'm suing. He is just a dumb guy, and he doesn't deserve that. I hated him when he was part of Maya and Carina, but he is getting his life together.

Travis has been a shitty friend to Vic, btw. Vic told him what happened with Theo and Travis just saying "Sometimes that happens".

I love we got to see more of Vic and Andy together.

As much as I loved those scenes with Maya and Carina in their apartment. I wished they were on the opening scene. That looked like fun. Maya and Carina are always out of the group.

Are Maya and Carina going to adopt that baby? I know Carina wants to give birth, but they just brought that pregnant lady for Carina to do something? Or is Jack adopting the baby?

What the hell is this? I want a written essay about why Carina flinches like that. Couldn't this scene be like 5 seconds longer?

I'm so annoyed that Carina had to wear her wedding outfit to the ball. You are telling me she didn't have any other dress??? ANY OTHER DRESS??? Why? What was the point? Why do the writers hate Carina so much? She could have gone and bought anything. I'm sure she has gone to some events that required formal dress.

I can't even enjoy her scenes at the ball because of that damn outfit.

I'd never forget Danielle for giving Maya bangs. I know it's just hair, but Maya is not a bangs woman. She wears her hair slicked in a tall ponytail, controlled and put together. Bangs are carefree.

Danielle looks beautiful, but that's not Maya. She could have waited a week to get bangs. I'm in mourning.

It wasn't even mentioned. When she cut her hair short, it made sense. It was a beautiful moment, and she looked very hot. But those bangs just, I don't know. I'd never question Danielle's acting choice, but I feel that this episode was more Danielle than Maya.

This was a good episode. I hope they keep this energy for future epsidoes

I'd love to see them getting ready for the ball. Maya and Carina with the group. They teasing Maya and Carina for being late. CARINA WITH A NEW DRESS (This bothers me so fucking much)

This was my favorite kiss, btw. I guess I'm a sucker for fluff. I loved this scene so much. Even tho We should have seen Maya topping Carina.

Anyways we survived Krista, and I hope next season is better. Zoanne Clack and Peter Paige, here are my recommendations:

Someone tell Danielle to put this pic on Maya's locker.

Bisexual Vic

Theo gone. Bring another female firefighter. (Latina, please?)

Redemption for Sullivan (I like Boris; I don't want him gone, ok?) Can they do something to make him likable? Please. He can be funny. We can save him.

Baby Deluca-Bishop (Bishop-Deluca still sounds better. If Maya weren't so whipped by her wife), It's time. I didn't want a baby, but I'm tired of this storyline. Just give them a baby, please.

More Carina Deluca in action

More Vic, Maya, and Andy together

More fires

More silly episodes

Whoever is reading fanfics realizes that Marina's baby should be named Andrea.

Maya and Carina change the sheets. Please, I'm begging. I'll change them myself if I have to.

P.S: Whoever edited this deserves an award. So unserious.

[tommydarlings]

She's a maniac | t.h

A/N: Finally it's here!!! Like I already said, when you can't read stuff like that, then please don't even try it!!! It could be really 'dangerous' for your mental health! Btw, I do not 'support' any of these serialkiller's! I just really love the topic! I hope you like this one as much as I do, anyway, enjoy! :) ily,liz <3

pairing: serialkiller!reader x Tom holland

warnings: swearing, talking about serialkiller stuff?, talking about murdering, talking about other serialkiller's, nearly sex? brief mention of necrophilia

w/c: 3.9k

Requests: CLOSED

Summary: Tom and his family are watching a live footage of the most dangerous women on earth, it's disgusting what you've did, but does he fall in love with you anyway? Well, yeah.

masterlist || taglist || requests ( in my masterlist)

"Tom, darling can I turn the TV on?" Nikki asked as she sat on Tom's couch. "Yeah, of course mom" he answered before Nikki turned his TV on. Dominic and the twins came out of the kitchen with a big bowl full of popcorn and sat down next to Nikki. "Are you guys coming?" Dominic asked from the living room while he looked at the kitchen. "Yes, we're coming dad!" paddy answers right before he and Tom came into the living room and sat down. "Any movie recommendations?" Sam asked his family. They all shook their head before Harry said, 

"Isn't there any good stuff on the TV" the redhead said quietly. Nikki zapped through the channel until she stopped at one. "What's that?" Tom asked as he looked at the screen that just showed a room with two chairs and one table in it. It kinda looked like a live footage. "Um… what is it called?" paddy asked after a while. They all shrugged while Tom took the remote and spoke up, 

"It's just called 'the most dangerous woman on earth - y/n y/ln" they all looked at each other with confusion written on everyone's faces. "Maybe the title does have nothing to do with the show? serie?, I don't know" Dominic said after a while. Suddenly, a police officer came into the room and spoke up, 

"Test, test, is the camera on?" he said while he looked at the camera in the corner of the room. So it is live. They all though. After a few seconds, the officer nodded and sat down onto one of the chairs. Suddenly someone opened the door and two police officers walked in with a woman in an inmate suit and handcuffs around her wrists. The police officers sat her down in the other chair and left the room. 

"Do you know her?" paddy asked quietly. They all shook their heads and went ahead with staring at the TV without any clue about who this woman was. Who you were. They all watched you with curious eyes. 

"So dear miss y/l/n, could you please explain to me what you have done?" you let a tiny but at the same time wicked laugh before you answered his question, 

"Do you want me to answer that question in detail?" you said. The officer shook his head and told you to go ahead telling him just the most important things about what you have done. "Well, in total I killed six men" you told him with a shrug. "What else have you done miss y/l/n" you smile before you said, 

"I followed them, I seduced them, I killed them, not more" 

"Not more? Well these pictures tell me otherwise" the police officer said before he opened a file and took six pictures out of it. He put them infront of you and you looked at them for a few seconds before the police officer spoke up again. 

"Would give me the honor and explain every single picture to me please?" the men asked teasingly. You shrugged before you accepted it and started to explain. 

"Men number one, Andy Richardson, he was an alcoholic, a stupid little motherfucker, I seduced him and then I hit him a few times with a crowbar on his head before I buried him in the woods" you smiled. "Men number two, Nicholas brown, he was an abusive dad and husband, one of the worst, I slid his throat and let him drown in his blood, just like he deserves it, then I took his body and laid it in his bathtub so it looked like suicide" and so on and on and on, with every single men got the police officers mind just more and more disturbed while he imagined all these things the man had to go trough. 

"Did you had any sexuall activities with the corpses afterwards?" the police officer asked you. You laughed before you leaned forward and answered quietly, 

"I'm honest officer, no, I didn't had any, not with a single man but I had my own little playroom, not the same like Christian Grey, but in my playroom, the men screamed, cried and begged too" and then you leaned even more forward and whispered, 

"Just like in Christian Grey's, and it was so much fun" you whispered with the biggest smirk ever. 

"This girl is sick" Nikki said while she shook her head desperately. "She has to go to a therapist quickly" Harry said after a few seconds of silence. They all agreed except for one person. Tom. He was so whipped. He thought that y/n was gorgeous and just breathtaking. But at the same time he felt extremely bad for thinking of her in that kind of way. She is a fucking serialkiller, she killed six men with her own hands. That is so disturbing and sick. 

Suddenly you stood up and walked around in the small room. "What are you doing miss y/l/n?" the officer asked. You shrugged before you answered. "I'm just walking around, is that a crime?" 

"No, but what you did to these men is a crime" 

"But probably a good one" 

"What exactly do you mean with that miss?" 

"This case is probably the best you ever had, right? You don't have to answer officer, I know that my case is the best that you ever had and that I'm basically your biggest trophy on the shelf. I'm your career break" you smiled widely. "How-how do you know that?" the officer asked while the fear started to rise in him. You laughed quietly, almost like the devil in person. 

"I studied this topic a lot, you know, serialkiller, crimes, murder, I studied all of this for years, so believe me when I tell you that I know much more about every single case and every single crime that was ever committed in the history of serialkiller's than you ever could" you said loudly and proud. He shook his head slowly before you laughed nervously and looked at you,

"I don't think so miss-" but you interrupted him immediately,

"You know officer, I maybe was really bad at school, like reallyyyyy bad, but when you believe that you know more about that topic that I basically live for, then think again mister, do not underestimate the things that I could do and especially the things that I know about the topic of serialkiller's, because I'm pretty sure that we both know by now that I have much more knowledge in that topic than you could even dream of" you told him smugly. The officer was shooked. He was frozen, he couldn't even look at you right now. He was fucking scared-

"I could hang there one day, haha" you said while you laughed and painted at the wall where pictures from other seriakiller were hanging. He looked at you with confusion on his face before he answered, 

"But first of all we have to take a picture of your face-" 

"No, no, no, not a picture of me, my head, my head could hang there one day you know? Haha, that would look so funny, my pale face hanging on the wall while blood is dripping down my throat and my eyes wide open while I stare at you. Ever. Single. Day" you said while you still stared at the wall with an amused smile on your face. 

"O-okay, i-I have a few questions now" he said quietly. "Go on sir" 

"favorite Serialkiller?" 

"Ted bundy" you answered immediately. 

"Why?" he asked while he looked at you. "He was a fucking genius, he was like the second jack the ripper the only problem was that he got caught, he was basically my inspiration and my role model. I loved him" the officer just sighed and went on, 

"A Serialkiller you don't like?" 

"Charles menson, he was a pussy, he just hired people to do the shitty job for him" 

"When and how did Ted bundy got executed?" 

"On January the 24th 1989 by the electric chair, easy" you laughed. 

"What kind of murderer was Jeffrey Dahmer?" 

"A cannibal" you answered smugly. 

"Who was John Wayne gacy?" 

"He was pogo the killer clown" 

"okay, what is necrophilia?" 

"Having sexuell intercours with a corpse" 

"Who is Richard ramirez?" 

"The night Stalker" 

"What is the quickest way to kill somebody?" 

"Either you shot him directly in the head, between his eyes or you slid his throat with a beautiful. sharp. knife" you whispered. 

"Why did you dismember your victims?" 

"Because it's fun, it's calming and even though it's a mess, in my way it's a beautiful and hot mess" 

"So you think that killing and dismember man is a beautiful and hot mess" 

"Torturing" you answered quickly. 

"What?" the officer asked. 

"Torturing. You forget that. You said 'killing and dismember' but I tortured them too, and that was even more fun" you laughed quietly. The police officer nodded while he though about the awful things you have done with your own hands. 

"You are disgusted" you said quickly while you looked him deep in the eyes. "What?" 

"You are disgusted from the things that I have done aren't you?" you asked with a grin. "How-how do you-" 

"Like I said, I know everything, you can't beat me in that topic, bundy was a fucking genius, ramirez was not that bad either, Dahmer was maybe even better than him but I'm, I'm the fucking goddess" you answered with the biggest smirk the police officer ever saw. He was really terrified to death now. He shouldn't be, but he was. "Do you have a family? Do you have kids?" you added. 

"Yes, yes I do have two kids" you hummed quietly before you spoke up, 

"We serialkiller's are your husbands, we're your son's, and your children are gonna be dead by tomorrow" you whispered without any emotion in your face. And that was the moment were everyone realized that you are cold. "I know that Ted bundy said that he is the most cold hearted son of a bitch you've ever met, but believe me when I tell you that I'm more cold hearted than he could ever be" you whispered. 

"I know that there's an age difference, but budy and you would have been the prefect couple" he answered. You laughed loudly. "But when wouldn't have lasted long" he raised his eyebrow. "Why?" 

You slowly leaned forward before you answered, 

"Because I would have chopped his dick off and took his eyes out and then I would slowly and maybe even gently cut his throat until he drowns in his own blood" you said quietly. Everyone was shooked and terrified to death. The police officer and everyone infront of the TV right now. 

"What is your family thinking about you?" this question surprised you. You didn't expected it all. 

"They haven't contacted me yet" you said while you looked at the wall behind him. 

He just nodded and wrote something in your file. 

"This girl is a fucking maniac" Sam said while he stared at the TV with wide eyes. 

"I think I'm gonna throw up" Paddy said quietly. 

"Yeah, sick bitch" Harry agreed with his brother. "I'm not sure if I'm able to sleep alone tonight" paddy said with pure seriousness in his voice. Nikki looked at him and hugged him tightly before she spoke up,

"Don't worry my love, she's never going to come near us, I promise" she told her son while Dominic nodded his head, agreeing with his wife. 

"Tom, are you okay?" Harry asked his big brother. Tom snapped out of his daydreaming zone and answered quickly, 

"Yeah, yeah of course" he said. "It's disturbing, I know, unbelievable that women like her are even allowed to sit in this room, she didn't even deserved that" Sam told his family, but Tom couldn't even focus. He was so stunned by your beauty, what is bullshit because he definitely shouldn't, is he doing it anyway? Is he daydreaming right now how your lips would feel on his lips? How your hands would feel on his biceps or how your hands would feel when he would hold you tight-

"Tom?!" Dominic yelled. "What?!" he yelled back. He quickly apologized before his father said, 

"We're going now, okay?" Tom nodded quickly and gave them all a quick goodbye before he went to bed. Still thinking about her. "Fuuuuck" he whispered to himself while he laid in bed and rubbed his hands over his face. "Fuck it" he said before he grabbed his phone and searched her up on Google. "Holy shit" he whispered as he saw what else she had done to these men."They didn't even discuss half of what she had done in the live footage" he said quietly to himself while he stared at his phone screen, reading all the awful things that you had done to these men. He was terrified but at the same time was he… fine with it? He couldn't give a fuck anymore, he just wanted to go to sleep now, when that's even possible now. He's gonna start filming spiderman 3 soon so he has to wake up early tomorrow. Let's wish him luck. 

---

"Tom!, Hey holland!" Jack yelled from his trailer on set. They were currently back on set, filming Spiderman 3. Tom walked to Jack's trailer and said, 

"Yeah, what's up Jack?" 

"I actually want you meet someone, one of my closest friends, actually she's my best friend" Tom looked at him curiously. "I thought that I was your best friend" he said sarcastically. Jack just laughed before he answered, 

"You are Tommy, but she is my best friend too" Jack said. "And who is she? Do I already know her?" he asked him. Jack scratched the back of his neck nervously. "Well, yes, you probably know her but you never met he personally" 

"Why are you so nervous all of a sudden?" Tom asked Jack with a little laugh. Jack shrugged and answered quickly, 

"I'm not nervous, it's just that I'm a little bit scared" he admitted quietly. Tom looked at him with confusion all over his face. "Why?" 

"Well, she's… special?" jack answered nervously. Tom just nodded with his head before he answered, 

"She can't be that bad jack, c'mon" 

"Okay, but you have to promise me to not freak out and run away" 

"O-okay?" Tom answered but it sounded more like an unsure question. "How about we meet up all together? Like zendaya, Jacob, you and me? At her house?" 

"Yeah, that's fine with me" Tom answered before he got called on set again to gon on with filming. After a few hours of filming, Tom went to Jack, Jacob and zendaya. "So is that okay for you guys?" Jack asked the group. "So, you pick us up at about 2 p.m?" zendaya asked Jack. He nodded quickly before Tom spoke up, 

"As long as she's no Serialkiller or something like that, then it's fine with me" he laughed loudly while Zendaya and Jacob joined him. Jack remained silent. 

Oh, if they would only know… 

---

"When are we here?" Jacob asked from the backseat. Tom sat in the passenger seat while Jacob and zendaya sat in the backseat. "Soon, in about 10 minutes we should be here" Jack answered. They all groaned but then nodded with their heads. 

"What is her name?" zendaya suddenly asked. Jack opened his mouth but he couldn't get a single word out. "Are you okay mate?" Tom asked his best friend. Jack nodded quickly before he answered zendaya's question. "It's uh, uhm… y/n?" he told her but it sounded more like a question. "Are you nervous? It's just a name jack you can chill dude" Jacob told him with a tiny laugh. "Yeah, you're right" Jack said. "Can you just please promise me that you won't run away? Or cry? Or yell at me or at her? Please, I beg you" Jack added. "Again Jack, why should we be scared?" Tom asked him. "I just-I don't know okay? You will see" Jack said quietly. They all looked at each other curiously before they all fixated their eyes on the road again. 

--- 

"Finally" Tom said while he stepped out of the car quickly. "Wow, the house is really pretty" Zendaya said. Jacob nodded with his head slowly before jack spoke up, 

"You ready?" he asked the group. "Yes Jack c'mon" Jacob answered quickly with a laugh. Jack scratched the back of his neck again. Something that he's doing when he's nervous. Jack knocked at the door three times before a women opnend it. 

It was you. Y/n y/l/n. The most dangerous women on earth and one of the biggest serialkiller in history. 

You smiled at Jack before you said, 

"Jacki my darling, finally you're here, who are they?" you asked while you hugged Jack and looked at the three of them. They all remained silent and just stared at you like you were some kind of alien. 

So obviously everyone knows who you are. 

They all obviously knew who you were because of the little footage. That by the way kinda went viral. Since that day, everyone knows and fears you. Especially men. So that's the reason why you are obviously single, who would have thought? 

"Come in, come in, please" you said happily. They all stared at you and then quickly at jack for a moment before they entered your house. "Do you guys want something to drink?" you asked them all while they sat down on your couch. They shook their head slowly before Jacob whispered into Tom's ear, 

"I-isn't that t-the-" 

"Yes it is Jacob and now you better shut up before she may kills us" Tom whispered back at his friend while he stared at your figure standing in the kitchen. "Don't you want to introduce your friends to me jack?" you asked him. He nodded quickly. "That's zendaya, she play's mj in spiderman, that's Jacob, he play's ned, the best friend of Peter Parker, and that is Tom, Peter Parker himself" 

"Nice to meet you all" you told them while you shook their hands. But as you shook Tom's hands, you felt something, something in your stomach. 

Butterflies. 

And he felt it too. 

--- 

Currently you were in the shower, just enjoying how the warm water ghosts over skin. Suddenly the shower curtain opens and a naked Tom steps in. "Well hello handsome" you told your boyfriend. "Hello darling" he told you as he stood behind you and wrapped his hands around your waist. He buried his face in the back of your neck and whispered, 

"I love you darling" 

"I love you too Tommy" you told him while you turned around and gave him a gentle kiss on his lips. "I'm so nervous" you admitted after a few seconds of just staring into each other's eyes. "You don't have to be my love, my family is gonna accept and love you, maybe it's gonna take some time but they will appreciate you I promise" 

"But you told me that you watched my footage Thomas, they heard what I said, they saw the way I acted! They are either going to act like they love me or they are going to be scared of me the entire time!" you told your boyfriend while you laid your head on his wet chest."But I know that you've changed baby, I know it. I know that your a better person now and that you will never do something like that ever again okay?" he said. You picked your head up and looked him deep in the eyes before he grabbed your legs and picked you up and leaned you against the shower wall." I love you so much, thank you" you told him while you put both of your hands on his cheeks. "I love you even more babygirl" he said before you slowly started to make out. 

--- 

Tom knocked on his family's door quickly before his mom opened. "Hey son, how are you my dear!" she asked him while they hugged. "I'm good thanks mom" everyone hugged Tom as he came through the door before Dominic spoke up, 

"So, where is the lucky girl you want us to meet?" he asked with a tiny grin. "Yeah mate, where's she?" Harry added. "She is a little bit shy okay? So please be 'gentle' with her okay?" he told his family. They all nodded before they heard a voice, 

"Tom, can I come?" you asked from the front door. "Did we already met her?" Sam asked. "Yeah, I don't know either, her voice sounds so familiar" Harry added. Tom just laughed nervously before he said, 

"Just please be gentle and kind okay?" they all nodded curiously before Tom told you to come in and there you stood. Infront of your boyfriend's family. They exactly knew who you were and what you did. They were frozen, they were still but at the same time were they terrified. 

"Hey, my n-name I-is y/n, y/n y/l/n" you slowly said while Tom put his arm around your waist. 

"O-oh m-my God" Nikki whispered with fear in her voice. 

"Tom, what, do y-you even k-know who s-she-?" Harry stuttered. 

"Yes, yes I know who she is, she is y/n y/l/n, my lovely girlfriend" he answered proudly with a smile. 

"Thomas are you crazy-" 

Suddenly, paddy went to you and extended his hand in your way, 

"Hello y/n, you're really pretty, my name is paddy" he told you. He knew who you were, but he saw you and knew that you won't be trouble. He believed in you. 

"Hello paddy, the pleasure is all mine" you told him while you shook his hand. 

"Calm down guys, please, she changed okay?" Tom told his family. 

"You don't know that Thomas" Nikki stated quietly while she looked you in the eyes. You honestly felt kinda guilty. "I love him" you suddenly blurted out of nowhere. "What?" Dominic asked you. "I love your son and I'm gonna prove it to you that I'm a good person, I know what I did in the past but like Tom already said, I've changed and I love him so please give me a chance" you asked them. They all looked at you before harry spoke up,

"You know what, yes, I believe in you too just like paddy so" he stepped forward and hugged you quickly before he said,

"Welcome to the family"

You couldn't be happier.

---

"Darling where are you?" Tom yelled from the bedroom. You were just about to go to sleep but you had other plans. "Coming!" Suddenly you came through the bedroom door with a beautiful but at the same time extremely sexy lingerie in red. Tom's favorite color on you.

"Oh lord have mercy with me" Tom mumble quietly to himself while he looked at you but you heard it loud and clear. You giggled quietly before you made your way to Tom and sat down onto his lap. He put both of his on your ass and looked at your breasts. "My eyes are up here Holland" you said. "Sorry, you just look so… tasty" he said before he leaned in and kissed you passionately. After a few kisses, you leaned in to whisper in his ear,

"Fuck me daddy"

He laughed wickedly before he whispered into your ear,

"Oh kitten, I'm going to fucking destroy you, now your going to be the one that is crying begging and screaming"

-`ღ´- ᶫᵒᵛᵉᵧₒᵤ -`ღ´-

Taglist:

@goodgirlgonetom @majo240820 @misshale21 @itstaskeen @pure-ghost @justafangirlduh @elizabeth-brown @roseke @onyourgoddamnleft @lovelyxtom @hallecarey1 @zspideyy @elizabeth228

[cassianstattoo]

HAPPY ACOSF RELEASE DAY!

(ACOSF SPOILERS AHEAD) ARE YOU EXCITED?

I personally am. It’s time for Nesta’s story (and not just hers) to be told. So, this leads to another thing I think (and hope) you’ve been waiting for.

LET’S EXPLAIN THE PLAYLIST! (Read every song’s meaning while or after reading the book) And thank you for all your love and support.

“Alone” by Melancholia: It describes the Cauldron scene at the beginning of the book. In this song you can feel the rage and how hard she’s struggling. This song is not about weakness. It’s about her strength.

“Impossible” by James Arthur: Chapter 1. Even if it’s not so clear in this chapter, I think this song represents how Cassian feels when Nesta’s around. He feels worthless and not so different from the other men she beds (as he thought in ACOFAS). He lost his hope of an happy future with the woman he loves and he feels like he’s breaking that last promise she made her. Everything just seems so impossible.

“Sister” by The Black Keys: Chapter 2. This just makes me think of Feyre and Nesta’s fight. It’s from Feyre’s pov.

“New House” by Toro y Moi: “I want a brand new house Something I can not buy, something I can afford I just want a long shower I been feeling so crowded” Chapter 3. It’s about Nesta settling down in the House of Wind. It’s not the place she feels she can call “home”. First of all, it’s not really hers. The last two sentences of this verse are about her breathing and trying to calm herself at the end of the chapter. She’s just tired.

“My Mother & I” by Lucy Dacus: Chapter 4. The whole song is about Nesta and the relationship with her mother when she was a child. I think there’s nothing else to say. Also, in the 1st Chapter it says that she’s born in spring, so the song talks about a girl who was born in May. It all fits.

“Teacher’s Pet” by Melanie Martinez”: “Teacher’s pet If I’m so special, why am I secret? Yeah, why the fuck is that? Do you regret The things we shared that I’ll never forget? Well, do you? Tell me that I know I’m young, but my mind is well beyond my years I knew this wouldn’t last, but fuck you, don’t you leave me here” Chapter 5 and 6. Nesta and Cassian’s first day of training together. She basically doesn’t want to act like she’s his pet and she’s got to do whatever he want just to respect her sister’s will.

“Dangerous Man” by Valley Of Wolves: “They say I’m a wanted man Holding line and break the fire I’m setting all the captives free But I’m hanging by a wire” Chapter 7. It’s about Eris and his double-cross. That’s how probably Cassian pictures Eris in his mind tbh.

“Control” by Halsey: Chapter 8. Nesta facing the stairs. It can be linked to other chapters too because if you take this song as a whole and not just a few verses, it really contains A LOT of things. For example, the line “The House was awake”. Also Chapter 9, when people start calling their children. You can find this moment in the song when it says “All the kids cried out ‘please stop, you’re scaring me”.

“Bookstore Girl” by Charlie Burg: Chapter 9. The bookstore girl is Gwyn and Nesta tries to know more about her.

“Wrong Direction” by Hailee Steinfeld: “I don’t hate you” Chapter 12. This song is about the chapter’s ending.

“You’ve Got a Friend In Me” by Cavetown: Chapter 13. Nesta and Gwyn’s interaction. Also, Nesta helping her.

“like that” by Bea Miller: Chapter 16. Nesta and Cassian’s tension is hilarious, but this song makes me thing about this scene so much.

“Queen” by Shawn Mendes: Chapter 17. Elain fighting with Nesta. This lyrics is so powerful. The first part is Elain talking to Nesta. The second part is Nesta talking to Elain.

“You’ll Follow Me Down” by Skunk Anansie: Chapter 17. Same scene. This is totally Nesta. She’s so scared of herself and of the world that surrounds her. She’s afraid to lose her sister in this world she still knows nothing about if not violence. She wants Elain by her side, even if it means dragging her down with her.

“Teeth” by 5 Seconds of Summer: Chapters 18/19. I like to call it “THE chapter”. Do you need me to explain why I chose this song? Um, I don’t think so. You know it.

“Only You” by Ellie Goulding: “Baby I’m on my knees” Chapter 22. He’s... returning the favor.

“Revolution” by Diplo, Faustix, Imanos, Kai: Chapter 24. Our girl Nesta knows what she’s doing. What she’s starting.

“Best Friend for Hire” by Anthony Amorim: Chapter 25. The whole song is about Nesta and Emerie’s interaction. Everytime I listen to it I can’t help but cry.

“Moment’s Silence (Common Tongue)” by Hozier: Chapter 26.  Nesta’s worried about Cassian and gives him relief.

“Rise Up” by Andra Day: Chapters 27/28. These three girls are going to rise up, bitches.

“Nina Cried Power” by Hozier, Mavie Staples: Chapter 29. This song is really powerful, just like Nesta. She always is, but in this chapter we learn HOW MUCH.

“Fix Me Now” by Garbage: “Bring me back to life (fix me now) Kiss me blind” Chapter 31. THAT scene. HE HEATED UP THE WHOLE ROOM Y’ALL. Cassian literally kissed her back to life.

“Ready or Not” by Fugees: Chapters 34/35/36. I can’t choose only one quote from this song. But can you hear its vibes? Nesta’s leading a dead army. This is THE power. 

“PILLOWTALK” by ZAYN: Chapter 37. *wink* This song says everything.

“Go Fuck Yourself” by Two Feet: Always chapter 37. I couldn’t choose just one song, you know. Also, lowkey Chapter 38.

“Never Again” by Breaking Benjamin: “Never again, never again Time will ot take the life from me” Chapter 38′s ending. All I can say is: NEVER AGAIN.

“Boy In The Bubble” by Alec Benjamin: Not linked to just one chapter. It makes me thing of Azriel a lot.

“Past Lives” by BØRNS: “I've got the strangest feeling This isn't our first time around Past lives couldn't ever come between us Some time the dreamers finally wake up Don't wake me I'm not dreaming“ Chapter 39. Gwyn and Azriel. Well, these lines are about them, but I think the rest of the song represents Elain and Azriel, too. I don’t know if you feel the same.

“Boulevard of Broken Dreams” by Green Day: THIS IS AZRIEL’S SONG. YOU CAN’T TELL ME OTHERWISE.

“Watch Me While I Bloom” by Hayley Williams: Chapter 41. Nesta teaching Cassian how to treat a woman. She’s got big dick energy ayeee

“R U Mine?” by Arctic Monkeys: Still chapter 41. Cassian taking control of the situation. This song just screams “dominant” lmao.

“Walls Could Talk” by Halsey: So Halsey once said “The House was awake” (Control). What if those Walls Could Talk? Like, poor thing. It could have a mental breakdown. This song is dedicated to the House of Wind ‘cause it needs respect. It’s alive. Just imagine how’d you feel watching non-stop those two fucking and fighting. Also Azriel, you’re loved.

“Despicable” by grandson: “If I were you I wouldn’t love me neither” Chapter 43. Tamlin deserves a song, too.

“Part Of Me” by Katy Perry: Chapters 45/46. It’s all SO chaotic. This song means a lot of things. They all lied to her, but this song is particularly about Nesta and Amren’s fight. In my opinion, she did the right think telling Feyre the truth ‘cause she deserved to know, but it just wasn’t the right time and space.

“Don’t Give Up On Me” by Andy Grammer: Chapter 47. Cassian’s going to take care of Nesta. She made a mistake but she knows here better than anyone. He won’t give up on her.

“There You Are” by ZAYN: Chapter 50. Cassian comforts Nesta when she finally explodes. He’s there for her with open arms.

“You Found Me” by The Fray: Still Chapter 50. This chapter was so hard to read and this is another song that can describe it best.

“Locked Out Of Heaven” by Bruno Mars: Chapter 51. Illyrian bat boys just love flat objects. I see.

“Thin White Lies” by 5 Seconds of Summer: Chapter 51. Yeah, still thinking about that desk.

“Chosen Family” by Rina Sawayama: Still Chapter 51. This song is wholly dedicated to Nesta’s new found family. Not only Gwyn and Emerie, but also Cassian.

“Library Magic” by The Head And The Heart: Chapter 52. Listen to this song and read the scene at the beginning of the chapter.

“Battle Cry” by Imagine Dragons: Chapter 54. I know it’s weird but I feel this song talks about Lanthys and Nesta’s fight.

“Hurt” by Christina Aguilera: Chapter 55. Nesta takes Cassian to the place she lived with her family in the mortal lands. It’s dirty and broken now but it’s still there. Nes talks about her father and realizes how much he’s done for her and her sisters.

“Story Of Another Us” by 5 Seconds of Summer: Chapter 56. I know this sounds like a sad song but to me it represents Gwyn’s present. The story of their past (of another “them”) and also their present.

“Drama Club” by Melanie Martinez: Chapter 57. Eris vibes, y’all. I know you can feel them. Everytime I listen to this song I can’t help but thinking of him. So the only thing I can tell you is: listen carefully.

“Genius” by Sia, Diplo, Labrinth: Chapter 57. Hear this song. It just makes me think of a ballroom where two people try to talk to other people and they’re avoiding to make eye contact. And they fail (yeah, those people are Cassian and Nesta btw)

“Therefore I Am” by Billie Eilish: Chapter 57. Still about Eris, but also Cassian. They can’t stand each other. So imagine the astronomical energy (inside of this bus lmfao) when Nesta comes in between.

“All About Us” by He Is We, Owl City: Chapter 57. Nessian dancing.

“Rock Bottom” by Hailee Steinfeld ft. DNCE: Chapter 58. This song is SO accurate. This is the moment I realized “That’s it. I think I can die happy now” and then I started crying. Nesta just thinking she’s not enough and she deserves to be with someone as ugly as she thinks she is. Cassian is like “shut the hell up, woman” and yeah. That’s the kind of energy and conversation I was waiting for.

“Stop Crying Your Heart Out” by Oasis: Chapter 58. Their life becomes brighter. They have to stop crying their heart out because of their fears and the emotions they keep trying to hide. They need to feel free and express all the love they can give to each other.

“Fade Into You” by Nashville Cast, Sam Palladio, Clare Bowen: Chapter 58. Finally the truth comes out and everything becomes real. Even if the song is pretty sad, the lyrics is just SO accurate and it describes the scene perfectly.

“I Miss You” by Adele: Chapter 59. Basically Nesta feeling needy ‘cause she doesn’t see Cassian for days, but it’s more than that. Pay attention to the depth of the song. It shakes you. And that’s what Nesta feels when she thinks of Nesta.

“Beautiful” by Christina Aguilera: Chapter 59/61. I want to dedicate it to my favorite girls in this book: Nesta, Emerie and Gwyn. They’ve been through a lot but they also learnt to face their fears. And they realized that unity is strength.

“Smile” by Uncle Kracker: Chapter 62. Cassian’s sooo happy to be with Nesta it breaks my heart. And his own too.

“Broken Pieces” by 5 Seconds of Summer: Chapter 62. Aaand here we go again. Cassian just wants Nesta to give him the chance to be happy with her.

“Carried Away” by H.E.R.: Chapter 62. Nesta thinks they got too carried away and now they’re at a point of no return. She opened herself to him too much. It’s not like she regrets this but she understands that now everything’s too real and changing. She doesn’t feel ready.

"What’s Up?” by 4 Non Blondes: Ending of Chapter 63. Okay, I’ll make you laugh but this is me after reading it. I needed to put a song about how I felt when I read this freaking ending, after all the devastation Chapter 62 brought into my heart. And the fact that Nesta’s 25 and the first line begins with “25 years”... I DIED. Also I think of her just screaming to the word “WHAT’S GOING ON?!”.

“Sisters Are Doin’ It For Themselves” by Eurythmics ft. Aretha Franklin: Chapters 64/65/66. DO I NEED TO DESCRIBE IT? NAH, I DON’T THINK SO. THESE GIRLS ARE POWERFUL, STRONG AND SMART AS HELL.

“Run The World (Girls)” by Beyoncé Chapters 67/68/69/70. The girls want to win and they’re going to conquer everything with no mercy.

“Puppets” by Depeche Mode: Chapter 71. Eris impotence t is heartbreaking.

“Warriors” by Imagine Dragons: This song is for every character. It’s about Nesta, Emerie and Gwyn, but also Cassian, Azriel and Eris. They’re fighting different battles and they’re doing it with every ounce of power they have.

“Emperor’s New Clothes” by Panic! At The Disco: Chapter 74. Nesta kicking Briallyn’s ass.

“Survivor” by Destiny’s Child: This song is dedicated to Emerie and Gwyn. They spent all their lives learning how to survive. At the end, they finally won.

“Set Fire to the Rain” by Adele: THE Nessian Anthem. I put this here ‘cause FINALLY they’re endgame. But something bad’s about to happen...

“Cancer” by My Chemical Romance: Chapter 76. This chapter’s been the hardest one to face. I had to put the book down for a minute and breathe. I know this song made you panic and ow you know why I chose it. I can’t stop crying thinking about Feyre in those conditions and all the IC and her sisters surrounding her. I’m still so heartbroken.

“You Saved Me” by Skunk Anansie: Chapter 77. Nesta cares about Feyre. She’s her little sister and she just can’t let her die like that. She gave her a happy ending even if Nes had to lose almost every ounce of power she had and learned to accept. But they’re worthless in comparison with her sisters life. She just loves them both. She’d do anything for them and this scene proves it.

“Lean on Me” by Bill Withers: This song is about friendship and sisterhood. Nesta’s relationship with Gwyn and Emerie, but also with Feyre and Elain (and lowkey Rhys). Also, I dedicate it to little Nyx, too. They all love you, babyboy, and would do anything for you. Welcome to this chaotic world, kid!

“Sorry” by Halsey: Chapter 78. These are not explicit apologies. Nesta doesn’t need to say “sorry” vocally. She already demonstrated it. Her actions speak louder than words and her sister know it. This song is not about a “romantic lover” but a “person who loves” and they all love too much and strongly.

“Amazing” by Aerosmith: WE FINALLY SEE THE LIGHT. This is the happy ending they deserve (but the cliffhanger is killing me tbh). It’s about everyone in this book. I put it in the playlist ‘cause at first I thought it could refer to Azriel and Cassian. But the more i listened to it, the more I realized it just describes every single character.

“The Reason” by Hoobastank↓

“this is me trying” by Taylor Swift: Both the songs refer to Chapter 80. Nesta visiting her father’s grave is one of the first steps to finally go on. The songs represent what she really wants to tell her father. He’s the reason to start over. And she’s trying. Even if she made mistakes she’s ready to fight for the happiness and love she denied herself years and now she knows she deserves it.

[qqueenofhades]

if you’re taking prompts (and from that September list which is GREAT) maybe #4 for the lovely immortal husbands? love your magical AU for them btw!! and DVLA of course!

Once again, I must note that I am not actively TAKING prompts, lol, and I reblogged that list several months ago (though yes, it is great). But also... flattery will get you everywhere?

Joe is innocently minding his own business – sitting on the balcony of their rented flat in one of the endless grey tower blocks, gazing out over the hazy skyline of Kyiv with its spires and tangled wires and hills and trolley cars, sketching in his notebook – when the door opens behind him and someone steps outside. He doesn’t look up for several moments, concentrating on shading in the green domes of St. Andrew’s Church just right, until he is prompted by a delicate cough. “Well, my heart? What do you think?”

Joe glances up – then drops his pencil and nearly knocks over his coffee cup (which would be a waste, since it is hard to get most things in 1986 Ukraine). “Ya Allah, Nicolò,” he stammers in Arabic, every other language momentarily driven out of his head by the magnitude of the horror before him. “What on earth have you done to yourself?!”

Nicky smirks at him. “What? Don’t you like it?”

Joe’s mouth is still open, so he shuts it, and concentrates on studying his lover in increasingly aghast fascination. Yes, well, Nicky’s hair was getting long and rather shaggy, since personal hygiene hasn’t been high on their list of priorities while working backbreaking, filthy, days-long shifts to help in the continuing evacuation of the Chernobyl Exclusion Zone and the clean-up and seal-off of Reactor Number Four. They’re taking a rest break in Kyiv right now, but they bus out to Pripyat again next week, and given the gauntlet of real horrors that they are elsewhere running, Joe would not have imagined that Nicky had the desire to inflict this monstrosity upon himself in their precious off hours. It’s a mullet, in other words. And it’s a very bad one. In Joe’s completely objective opinion, Nicky is the handsomest man alive, but even he can’t pull this off. The stringy bits on top, the badly shaved sides with a plastic razor – and that is not even to mention the mustache, often favored by gentlemen in explicit 1970s films. Joe keeps staring like a deer in headlights, in the crosshairs of a barreling fashion calamity. Finally he manages, “Nicolò, absolutely not.”

“Oh come on.” Nicky’s slightly wicked grin broadens. “You haven’t even seen the tighty-whitie shorts that go with it.”

This is admittedly an interesting bribe, though not enough to overlook the – everything else. “What?” Joe repeats faintly. “You want to look like Eurotrash out at the discotheque?”

“When in Rome…” Nicky remarks archly. “What? I said nothing when you had that Afro last decade, remember?”

“That,” Joe says with immense dignity, “is completely different. I am from Africa, so by any measure I have the right to wear an Afro. You are not a creepy extra in a Richard Simmons workout video. And we were working with the Black Panthers, so obviously – ”

“Exactly,” Nicky says. “Just fitting in to the local culture.”

Joe continues to sit there like a goldfish, still shaking his head in numb disbelief. “I can’t sleep next to you like that, Nicolò. It will give me nightmares.”

“Really?” Nicky crosses the balcony and perches on the arm of Joe’s chair, thus to let him appreciate it better at close range. “Isn’t every good relationship about making sacrifices?”

“Love has two faces,” Joe shoots back. “One of them is the face of devastation.”

“Mmm.” Nicky leans in. “Are you quoting Abu Nuwas again, my heart, or just being a drama king?”

Truly, this man knows him far too well. “You’re messing – ” Joe stares at him accusingly. “You are messing with me.”

“No,” Nicky pronounces, face completely straight. “No, not at all. I love it. I think I’ll keep it like this.”

Joe opens his mouth, about to say something else despairing, but stops. Yes, the mullet is an abomination of God’s earth (along with most hairstyles of the 1980s), but if Nicolò wants to wear this idiot look for a moment of levity in what they are otherwise faced with, what harm, truly, will it do? There were four horrible days after their first round of cleanup shifts, where even they were sick as dogs as the radiation worked its way out of their bodies, and the way Nicky looked then – Joe can still see it whenever he closes his eyes, so that mullet-related nightmares might be far preferable. Besides. He is very well aware that right now, there are other gay men losing their partners to a mysterious and unstoppable scourge, that in San Francisco and New York in America especially, the disease now called AIDS (but first known as GRID, Gay-Related Immune Deficiency) is ravaging entire communities while President Reagan sits idly by. Suddenly needing to make sure that any of that is very far away, Joe reaches out convulsively, catches Nicky’s head (stringy bits and all) and kisses him. “I don’t mind,” he says, just in case Nicolò thought he was actually serious. “I may have to wear a blindfold when we make love, but – ”

Nicky starts to answer, but is interrupted as the balcony door opens, Booker starts to come out, sees that the lovebirds are occupied out here, and beats a smart retreat. Even this, however, is not enough to stop him shouting, “Nicky, what the hell is that?”

“See.” Joe looks at his lover with wounded vindication. “I’m not the only one who has questions. Many questions.”

“Mmm,” Nicky says again, sliding into Joe’s lap. “Say that you love it.”

“No.”

“You do love it.”

“I love you, Nicolò. Not the mullet.”

“Shh.” Nicky leans in, and as they kiss, Joe can feel him smiling. “Just go with it.”

(Joe grumbles, but kisses him back, and doesn’t say anything else, and they go back inside as Andy returns from what can optimistically be called a shopping trip, and make dinner. Nicky entertains the entire team with jokes at his own expense as they eat, and Joe looks at him and understands exactly why Nicky did it, made a fool of himself to help them laugh, help them think about something else than radiation poisoning and piles of shot animals, and he loves this man so much that he can barely stand it. And so they go to bed that night after Nicky has removed the scissors and razor and sent the mullet and pornstache to their well-deserved grave, and love does indeed have two faces, and the other one, as always, is forever.)

[peralta-guaranteed]

Not a prompt just some thoughts I wanted to shared with someone after your last post on Teddys proposals and also your fic with Rosa sending him to the ER which I loved btw 😂

Is like Jake is such a good men u know he treats woman as they deserve like every men should, like the exeption to the rule of how girls are treated when in fact Teddys misbeheaviour should be the exeption to the rule.

While Teddy constantly proposes to Amy while she is dating Jake and he gives a f*ck about it and basically ask her to dump Jake and come back with him being so disrespectful with her choices and feelings, we get to see Jake saying to Amy "I like you but I respect you are with some one else, I just needed to tell you, I know nothing's gonna happen". While Teddy is with his girlfriend and proposes Amy or he is married and about to have a child and still proposes Amy not giving a f*uck again about the women he is with who sure they actually like him and love him and hurting their feelings, we get to see that Jake during the Road Trip even if when he founds out Amy has feelings for him and it clearly hits him bc in the bottom of his heart he is still into her, he doesn't follow Amy and throws everything away with Sophia, he just go with his girlfriend and apologizes for what she had to experience respecting his currently relationship and continues dating her just because its not right to hurt her for something he still doesn't know where it could leads (and its not right to hurt her anyways, break ups should be polite).

Hope I made myself clear. Jake Peralte the ultimate men we all deserve a guy like him in our lives.

yes YES yes absolutely I will forever praise Jake Peralta being imagined and acted as / by a feminist man (Andy Samberg might not be writing him but he sure as hell is giving input as producer and making acting choices)

the absolute abundance of moments and scenes where Jake makes it clear that he's never going to try to break inbetween Amy and anything/anyone she cares for, not her job, not her current partner, not her father, not her weird interests, nothing. The respect of "I might not like this/them but it's not my place to say anything at all and absolutely your choice" and later on "if this is part of your life I will respect it and try to make it part of mine as well to better our relationship" like...!!

Meanwhile Teddy hasn't seen Amy for YEARS he has literally no idea what person she is right now, whether they would even still work out if they tried, and yet he decides that there's nothing better than asking her to marry him like she has nothing else going on in her life. Like he's the only thing that could matter to her. Complete disregard for anything she could want, like who gives a shit? He wants her and that's it. And yes also completely ignoring his own life and the people in it that he should fucking care for, the idea that someday his child (daughter maybe even) is going to hear about how Dad kept trying to go off with some random woman his wife has never even met. Disgusting.

Jake's relationship with Sofia is never shown as a 'bad' thing in the way of Peraltiago either, even with their bad breakup Sofia isn't demonised by him or any of his co-workers afterwards or mentioned as a bad example later on, beyond the typical 'she broke your heart so now we don't like her' of friendship.

It's so good and the fact that we need to gush about it being shown in a TV show when it should be the bare f*cking minimum is kinda sad but also good that it exists in a show!!! Good that we have an example of it!!!

[lesbianlotties]

Heyyy I really didn't wanna bother you but I saw the prompt "Promise me you'll live a great life, without me" while I was thinking about immortal wives and now I can't stop thinking about it (and it hurts...) btw I found your blog like an hour ago and I'm already in love with you and everything you write💜

Hiii thank you so much!! 💜 it’s not a bother at all! it made me so happy (actually so sad bc sad prompt hurts lol) thanks for all the love!

warning: this prompt nearly made me cry while writing! proceed with caution. but! no one actually dies here okay? i promise

--

Andy got injured during their latest mission, badly injured. It was bad enough that the stubborn woman didn’t even put up a fight at all when her team brought a doctor. It was bad enough that she let them put a bandage on her stomach, let them carry her to her room, let them try to take care of her, and let herself just lay there and… wait.

If this had happened a couple of years ago,  she wouldn’t have allowed all that fuss around her. She would have swatted the caring hands away and like Lykon once did, she would have said, “It’s my time.” She would have left feeling at peace, pained to leave her family, to leave Nile while she was still so young, but… But there was one particular reason for Andy to wish to survive, even now, and she was currently sitting on the edge of their bed, tenderly holding Andy’s hand.

Quynh’s eyes were just the slightest bit red and swollen and it didn’t take to know her better than anyone else, as Andy did, to guess that she’d been crying. She opened her mouth once or twice to try to say something, but only fragile sighs escaped her lips.

“Quynh,” Andy called her name. After a few hours of silence the effort shook her body, but it was a pleasant pain, to speak the name she had worshipped for thousands of years.

“Shh, you have to rest,” Quynh protested, mindful of Andy’s fever, mindful of the wound that didn’t close itself, mindful of Andy’s difficulty breathing. But her wife was stubborn.

“There are things I have to say,” Andy insisted, squeezing lightly the hand that was holding hers.

But Quynh shook her head, “Not now, my heart, you don’t have to. You’ll be fine, you’ll heal and then you can tell me everything you want, yes?”

“Quynh, my love, look at me,” Andy insisted once more, her voice was scratchy, but it was true that Quynh had been, up until that moment, avoiding her eyes. “This doesn’t look good, does it?”

“No,” Quynh shook her head again, frowning a little as she looked at Andy’s face. But after all this time, after more than three thousand years, she wouldn’t dare do to Andy the outrageous offence of looking at her with pity of any kind. “But you do look good, as always,” she smiled.

Andy laughed, her body rocking with the effort, but when it turned to coughing, her face distorted in a pained grimace. When the moment passed, she sighed, she closed her eyes and stood still for a moment, gathering the last of her strength. Finally, she spoke up, “You have to let me say it, please,” and after receiving a nod from the woman she loved, she went on, “I’ve loved you, since the very first dream of you I had. Finding you has been the only miracle I ever believed. I am grateful, and still can’t completely believe that you’ve loved me this long, even more stunned that you’ve forgiven me. I did not. I didn’t ever forgive myself for letting them take you, for not finding you myself sooner. But now, every moment with you has been nothing short of glorious. The only thing I wished, the only thing I hoped for was to have you by my side when my time came. I don’t want to leave you, Quynh, but I’ll leave happily knowing you’ll be here, living the life you deserved, the life you are owed. Promise me you’ll live a great life, without me.”

“There is no greatness in life without you,” Quynh looked at Andy with every emotion possible. There was love, pride, adoration, heartache, pain, friendship, loyalty, and even more love. She gently lifted Andy’s hand up to her face and kissed her knuckles. “Em yêu chị,” she whispered.

A few tears had escaped Quynh’s eyes as she listened to Andy talk, but even more started to fall a moment later, when she saw Andy’s beautiful green eyes close as she slept profoundly. But she was still breathing. She was still breathing and her pulse was faint but it was there. Quynh wouldn’t leave her place right beside Andy. Not because she had promised to be there when Andy died for one last time, but because she was confident Andy would heal, slowly but surely, she would heal, she had to heal. And she wanted to be there to wrap her in her arms so they could go on with the life they both deserved, the life they were owed. Maybe she’d have to say goodbye to Andy one day, but not yet.

--

Text in Vietnamese by @itsme-imhere

- Em yêu chị.” (I love you)