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makeste · 3 years

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BnHA Chapter 313: Deku VS Lady Nagant

Previously on BnHA: Hawks’s super-hot badass murder senpai Lady Nagant showed up to fire a cupid’s arrow into my heart, and a bunch of literal bullets into my son. Deku was all “oh shit it’s Hawks’s super-hot badass murder senpai, what do I do, let me think back to Hawks’s advice for a sec.” Flashback!Hawks was all “anyway Deku so if my super-hot badass murder senpai ever shows up you’re basically screwed so you’d better abscond the fuck out of there.” Present!Deku was all “lol idek why I flashed back to that conversation since I’m just going to do the exact opposite of what Hawks said” and charged directly toward Nagant because WHY NOT. Overhaul was all “waah I need to get back to my boss who I put in a coma out of love” and Nagant was all “jesus christ why did I even bring you here” and had a flashback to AFO who was all “ILU NAGANT IMMA GIVE YOU AN EXTRA QUIRK SO PLEASE CAPTURE DEKU FOR ME PLEASE AND THANKS” and yeah. Shit is all over the place right now and I love it.

Today on BnHA: All Might gets attacked by a pair of discount assassins and is all “Call an ambulance! ...BUT NOT FOR ME” and it’s really badass but also I really wish he would stop tempting fate like this. Lady Nagant is all “[casually flies around town shooting shit]” and I’d be lying if I said I wouldn’t read an entire chapter of just that. Deku is all, “[gets shot (≥_<)]” and releases a giant Smokescreen which prompts En to show up. En is all, “( •᷄⌓•᷅ ) (⌣̀ Δ⌣́) ( •̀_•́ )σ (¬､¬) (눈_눈)” which I consider to be a high point of both the chapter and of my life. The chapter ends with Deku using the Third’s quirk to launch a bunch of random objects at Nagant so that he can jump up and grab her arm all sneaky-like, and I’m sure this is going to prompt another week’s worth of discourse that I don’t care about at all, but fuck it, I’m having a good time.

OH WE’RE CUTTING BACK TO ALL MIGHT WELL THAT’S NICE I GUESS. CONGRATS ON NOT BEING DEAD

you named your car??

you named it Hercules??

I love you so much??

please marry me you giant fucking dork???

lmao speaking of huge fucking dorks

who the fuck are you clowns. la dee da we’re gonna murder All Might with our synchronized spear attack!! I mean... they’re clearly trying their best... maybe I should just be nice and politely hype them up like All Might is so clearly trying to do

like okay, but we all agree that this is actually the least intimidating attack any of us has ever seen, right?? these guys zipped up their hoodies all serious-like and are trying to attack All Might and Hercules with their Walmart tiki torches, but just, no?? right?? like the only way this could possibly be effective is if they were trying to kill All Might with secondhand embarrassment

“those are assassins” this is a VERY generous assessment, All Might

OH MY GOD THE TIKI TORCHES ACTUALLY KILLED THE FUCK OUT OF HERCULES

[slaps roof of car] this baby can fit so many weaponized festive backyard lighting solutions in it

and yet, even after watching this with my own two eyes, I still can’t take these dudes seriously. idek what it is. anyways r.i.p. Hercules, I loved you a lot but I guess you weren’t actually a very good armored car were you

omg they didn’t know it was All Might??

okay 1) for a moment there I was like “oh hey maybe they’re not so bad after all” but then a moment later it was like “ah nope, they are.” like, that was an interesting .06 second emotional journey there. anyways 2) All Might you have my permission to kick their asses for this disrespect, and 3) anyone else all of a sudden getting “wouldn’t this be an interesting time for Stain to suddenly show up” vibes?? no?? just me???

(ETA: hmm tbh I’ve still got those vibes and they haven’t gone away lol. Stain?? you out there buddy?? do you want to be cool for just once in your life. ball’s in your court pal.)

OH SNAP ALL MIGHT ARE YOU REALLY GONNA DO IT ARE YOU GONNA KICK THEIR ASSES

PROTECTIVE DAD MODE ACTIVATED?? BECAUSE YOU KNOW I’M HERE FOR THAT SHIT, SO YEAH, FEEL FREE

omg he’s shouting at them about how much Deku has suffered lmao and they’re just like falling over from being scolded

so they have absolutely no idea what he’s talking about though, right? “SIR THIS IS A WENDY’S” well whatever, you killed his pet car so he’s in a bad mood now

OH MY GOD

LIKE, JUST SO WE’RE ALL CLEAR, THESE FOUR PAGES SO FAR HAVE MADE ALMOST ZERO SENSE. LIKE MAYBE 2% SENSE TOPS. BUT ASK ME IF I CARE. GO AHEAD AND ASK. I SAID GO AHEAD, IT’S OKAY. ...NO I DON’T CARE AT ALL THANK YOU FOR ASKING

(ETA: also, the more I look at this panel, the more I’m just like, why the hell would you phrase it like that though, sob. way to doubly tempt fate?? are you trying to give Horikoshi a challenge??)

and now back to Deku who is randomly bouncing around the city and narrating it to himself just in case he was confused about why he was doing this

who are you talking to Deku. but thanks we appreciate it

man you gotta love that overconfidence. the smartest guy in the world warned you away from this lady, so SURE, LET’S RUN RIGHT UP TO HER. “I APPRECIATE YOUR INPUT, FLASHBACK!HAWKS, BUT I’LL TAKE IT FROM HERE” well okay then!!

I think it would be funny if RHA.com put little Buzzfeed-style polls in between the chapter pages so they could survey people at random intervals as they read their way through the chapter. like, you finish this page and then there’s a little poll there asking “do you think Deku’s plan of catching up to Lady Nagant and finding out where Shigaraki is will work?”, and you click “no” just like everyone else and then nod as the results show that 97% of your fellow readers also picked “no”, and you chuckle to yourself wondering how many of the 3% accidentally clicked on the wrong option by mistake, and then you keep on reading

ANYWAY, SO

HOW’S THAT PLAN WORKING OUT FOR YOU SO FAR DEKU. nice kick, though!!

omggggggg

ouch

update: Deku’s plan not really working out. sources tell me my boy has been fucking shot. this is an ongoing story and we will keep you posted with the latest developments as they come in

wait what

feel free to explain to the rest of us what all of this “UNLESS...” and “THAT POSSIBILITY...” shit means anytime, Deku

oh lol did he realize she could fly??

BREAKING NEWS UPDATE, CNN’s John King reports that Deku is still fucked. eyewitness reports now coming in that Nagant is doing no-look shots and basically not even giving a fuck. sources described her mannerisms and expression as “sexy, but in like an effortless sort of way.” we will continue to bring you the latest

so now there’s basically an entire page of Deku being all “ah fuck so she’s basically closing in and she could already hit me with impossible accuracy even from Far Away, so if that’s the case then her being Up Close is probably going to be even worse!” making good use of that Big Hero Brain there, Deku

so now what, you’re doing some kind of spiraling kick thing?? how is that going to help

oh lol he’s using Smokescreen to create some cover. aww, good for you Deku you named one of your Smokescreen attacks

OH NO LADY DON’T TELL ME AFO DIDN’T EVEN FILL YOU IN ON THE BASICS

seriously, AFO?? you basically told her what Deku’s exact strategy was going to be but then couldn’t be assed to drop that little, small, barely notable piece of knowledge that Deku is rocking multiple quirks?? is it supposed to be a secret or something?? you dropped the ball here man

damn this is getting intense now

(ETA: the way En is poking Deku’s head in that first panel is fucking sending me, I love this guy so much omg.)

well then what are you planning, Deku?? I’m actually really curious!! I am genuinely starting to be invested in this fight scene not only in the “wanting to see who wins and how that impacts the plot” sense, but also in the “wanting to see how it happens because the choreography and strategy is actually pretty cool” sense, which honestly hasn’t happened for quite a while now! this is fun

anyway so what’s up Deku, are you going to use another quirk?? I’ve been speculating that he hasn’t actually unlocked the last two yet (since Two and Three didn’t exactly seem convinced when we last saw them), but maybe I’m about to be proven wrong

(ETA: well he clearly has Three’s obviously, but Two’s is still MIA, and that’s the one I am of course the most curious about. that’s the one we’re all curious about, let’s be real.)

OH SNAP???

AHHHH I’M HYPED LOL. ANOTHER SHINY NEW QUIRK LOL SHOULD I PUT UP THE USUAL DISCOURSE DISCLAIMER

(ETA: so yeah, after thinking on it, I’m not gonna say “please no Deku discourse on my blog” this week, but I probably will ignore any discourse that does come my way though, just because I don’t have much interest in getting involved in what would probably be a pretty repetitive discussion. like, I can just sum up my opinions (which is what they are) here instead. in fact here they are lol:

1) I like the SIXQUIRKS and I like seeing Deku be a badass.

2) I also don’t think Deku is too OP. more like he’s exactly as OP as he needs to be at the moment, given that we’re approaching the end of the series. I expect the other kids will also be pretty damn OP when we see them fight again. we’re just at that point now where they’re all badasses (as well they should be; they’ve grown a lot and they deserve it). it’s just that Deku’s the one we’re getting to see right now.

3) of course I miss Kacchan and the others, but for me this vibes much closer to the MVA arc where even though I missed them, I was still having a blast (as opposed to the dark days of the Basement arc where I was pretty much losing it lol). like, even though Kacchan’s my favorite, I still love Deku a lot and this arc has been amazing for him getting to shine on his own (for like the first time, really).

4) y’all know I love the OFA plot and I’ve never been shy about that lol. I like all of the Vestiges a lot. Banjou and his over the top personality; En and his “guy you thought would be serious and :| all the time but is actually hyper-animated and ALL OVER THE PLACE” energy; Shiro who actually is a :| sort of guy lol; Three who I still expect will be fleshed out in a more detailed flashback at some point; and of course Two, who, well. you know what I think about him lol. Bakuverse is still on the table and I’m still hyped. I don’t think it’s a coincidence that we still have yet to see Two actually talk to Deku (as opposed to talking to the other Vestiges while Deku is distracted). did he lend him his power yet?? or is he still holding out?? either way it’s definitely going to be a Big Thing when it finally happens and I can’t wait to see it.

5) Lady Nagant is Everything and just because Deku grabbed her arm doesn’t mean the fight is over yet lol. Overhaul hasn’t come into play yet either. not to mention that even if the fight is over, the “where do we go from here” part still has me excited either way. her connection to Hawks and the HPSC is very intriguing and we’ve barely touched on that as of yet; she definitely has more of a role to play in this.

6) last but not least, I feel like every week the discussion is all about how much focus Deku’s getting, and how OP he is or isn’t, and OFA this and OFA that, but meanwhile I’m actually so invested in the character development here though?? the way Deku has distanced himself from everyone (except for the Vestiges, because of course they’re already dead so it’s not like they can die again lol)?? the way he’s pushing himself far too hard and we can see the shadows in and under his eyes, and the fact that he never smiles, and even All Might has remarked on how he isn’t taking care of himself at all?? the fact that he’s so single-mindedly obsessed with focused on stopping AFO?? the fact that he’s still the same sweet old Deku despite everything and was so kind to that fox lady with the umbrella, but there was also something so sad about that scene because it felt like a reminder of the type of hero that he wants to be, but that he’s not allowed to be right now?? because the stakes are too high and the world is falling apart?? and he feels like he’s the only one who can do something about it?? and that he has to be?? and that he is putting so much pressure on himself right now, and it’s absolutely too much pressure for any one person to bear, and I feel like no one is fucking talking about this lol goddammit.

anyway so yeah. I have feels about this, and every week that slow-burn angst is getting more and more intense behind the scenes, and I feel like it’s all going to hit a breaking point eventually. sooner rather than later. it really feels like a mirror of Katsuki’s post-Kamino arc. where all that angst was just churning below the surface for like twenty chapters and then it finally was like “okay it’s time” and it all came bursting out and we got the best five chapters of the fucking series (in my admittedly biased estimation lol).

basically, I know that most of fandom is billing this as either the “villain hunt” arc or the “solo Deku SIXQUIRKS fighting arc” or whatever. but for me, it’s always been and still is the Deku Angst arc lol. the cool fights are a sexy bonus (the worldbuilding less so because even though it’s interesting to see society at such a low point, it’s also very depressing and gets old pretty fast), but for me the thing that’s really keeping me engaged chapter after chapter is seeing Deku like we’ve never seen him before. seeing him all quiet and withdrawn and brooding and focused on AFO, AFO, AFO, and seeing that “he just doesn’t take himself into account” mentality taken to extremes. I am invested in that. I’m soaking up that angst each and every week, and I’m invested in seeing what comes of it. it’s a big picture thing. week to week this arc might just seem like a bunch of villain fight scenes, sure. but Deku’s emotional journey is the thread that’s going to carry this arc through from beginning to end, and for that I’m willing to be patient.

anyway that turned into a BIG OL’ RANT there but yeah! so those are my thoughts on the disk horse as it currently stands. and like I said, I’m open to discussion, but tbh I will probably just wind up repeating these same talking points endlessly so just a fair warning lol.)

anyway so Three says Deku has yet to use his quirk at ALL but now he’s trying to combine it with another quirk?? damn. also please check out En’s face here you guys

En launching a sneak attack up my favorite character list by the sheer power of his expressions alone. he really knows how to make the most of his screentime

OH DAMN DEKU

at this point the 3% from that hypothetical poll earlier are starting to feel prettttty damn smug, I’ll bet. well shit

what in the fuck

?? so like releasing his chi or whatnot?? isn’t that basically just like base OFA all over again?? also Deku did you seriously just apologize to Gran’s cape

update: Nagant has turned her eyeball into a gun

hm. hmmmmmmm. ...okay yep, still somehow sexy

anyway so she’s just floating up there building suspense, as one does. lord I sure hope she has good reflexes because something tells me she’s going to need them

OH SNAP HE THREW GRAN’S CAPE AS A DECOY WHAAAAT OKAY THAT’S SOME SMART SHIT DEKU

LOL SHE’S MAD NOW

JESUS CHRIST SHE JUST NEVER TAKES A GODDAMN BREAK FROM BEING AWESOME HUH

DEKU ARE YOU JUST THROWING EVERY DAMN THING IN YOUR INVENTORY

but without the cape and the hood how will you continue to look like an enigmatic badass. you really can’t. which means we might finally be moving on from the wandering nomad part of this arc, stay tuned

LOL YOU MANIAC

I hope he went full Kacchan with the dialogue there. his face sure looks like it lol. popped out of a building all mad fdskljlkj omg

well this was fun, shit. I still have basically no idea what Three’s quirk does though lol. like, can he use it to charge up objects with kinetic energy or something?? but then what was all of that talk about combining it with one of the other quirks?? or was that just because he was using Smokescreen at the same time??

(ETA: having seen and read an additional half-dozen explanations of Three’s quirk, I can say with confidence that I still have basically no idea what it is or does.)

anyway so!! Deku is a badasssssss but something tells me not to count Nagant out just yet even so. also I really enjoy seeing Deku flip out on people like he doesn’t have a fucking hole in his torso because it reminds me of A CERTAIN SOMEONE and I always love to see him channeling that feral energy; I feel like it’s been a while

anyways good luck to you both!! I truly wish that both of you could win. but if not, then maybe you can at least become friends instead. you have so much in common, you both can fly and have multiple quirks and you’re both badasses, and plus it would just be really funny to see the look on Hawks’s face lmao

#bnha 313 #midoriya izuku #lady nagant #bnha meta #deku meta #bnha #boku no hero academia #bnha spoilers #mha spoilers #bnha manga spoilers #makeste reads bnha

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suddenlysackler · 3 years

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One Little Spark

Charlie Barber x Reader

TW: general somber tones, alcohol, covid19, election, anxiety, depression, some angst and cynicism if you squint

A/N: Hello! It’s been awhile, hasn’t it? This is something I had written right after the election returns in November, got halfway through and then couldn’t bring myself to finish it. There’s a looooot of self projecting in it and it certainly is not my best, but I wanted to share something with you all. I miss you very much and hope to get back to posting more often soon. Thanks for reading!

...

There are three empty bottles of wine scattered around the living room now, something that might surprise someone given all of the talk about drinking in excess over the past five days to cope.

Not that it mattered anyway because, in reality, you weren’t really coping. Neither was Charlie.

Your electricity bill would surely be head and shoulders above what it typically was on any given month and your bed hadn’t seen any use since the wee hours of Tuesday morning when the two of you had pulled yourself from the security and warmth of blankets and sleep to vote and then head to work. Work had seemed like more of a formality than anything else after slipping your ballot into the machine in the gym of the elementary school that had been deemed a polling place. No one in the office really got much done Tuesday and you had opted to work from home to keep Charlie company in the following days.

The two of you had fallen asleep on the couch with the sounds of news anchor speculation just a little louder than you cared for typically.

“Just in case something happens.” Charlie had said, remote in one hand while the other snaked around your waist as you drifted off to the most broken sleep of your life.

The pandemic had been hard on both of you in different ways — you were working with a skeleton staff due to Broadway going dark and, well, Charlie had no work. The two of you were getting along just fine financially, but the lack of things to do and people to see were taxing. Not only that, but Henry just so happened to be with Nicole when things began to shut down and neither she nor Charlie felt right sending him on a plane back to New York.

All of this is to say that, since March, the two of you had not been doing well. It was quieter around the apartment than usual and three weeks into the stay at home order Charlie had put away the toys scattered around the apartment from Henry’s last visit to avoid the pang that shot through each of your chests every time someone tripped on one or caught a glimpse of another.

Charlie didn’t know what to do with himself when you were finally called back into the office. Sure, he wrote and he organized virtual workshops and networked as much as he could and even tried to get some of his older stuff published, but it wasn’t enough to keep him satisfied and invigorated. You busied yourself with cooking when you were home and the two of you took as much time to walk or go for runs or whatever you could do in order to stay active and get some fresh air.

The two of you had had the discussion multiple times since maybe June — would the election fix everything? Absolutely not. Would it get rid of the pandemic overnight? Again, not at all possible. But maybe, just maybe, if it was the outcome you were looking for, there might be some spark of life and hope instilled back into the apartment that had once been so full of joy and possibilities.

“You didn’t sleep again, did you?” You ask that Saturday morning, blinking away sleep and snuggling down even more into Charlie’s chest.

“No.” He shrugged, eyes trained on the ceiling as he listened to the same characters on the same news station talk about the same election returns that they had for the past two days.

Your stomach sank because, yeah, you hadn’t slept well, but you had at least slept. “Did you work at all?”

Charlie shook his head, taking a deep breath as he glanced back toward the television.

“We should just turn this off, honey.” You whisper, reaching over to grab the remote and jumping when a large hand shot out to stop you.

He shook his head once more, eyes pleading and round and bloodshot. “What if they call it?”

Holding his gaze steadily, you shake your head and encircle your hand around his wrist. “Then they’ll call it. We’ll find out one way or another.” You continue to whisper, eyelashes fluttering. “Someone once told me that if news is important enough, it’ll reach you even if you don’t have a newspaper or television.”

Charlie’s expression wavers somewhere between incredulousness, exhaustion, and desperation. He needs to know, needs to be put at ease, but he also knows the two of you can’t keep doing this. It’s not sustainable and if it’s not the outcome you want...Well, Charlie doesn’t really know what he would do. Especially after having waited so long.

“Please, baby?” You plead, your own face just as desperate for some sort of respite.

He’s silent for a long moment, weighing his options but not really focusing on any one in particular — his mind feels like jello. His resolve is breaking. “Okay.” He finally breathes out a sigh of defeat and slouches back, turning the television off himself and visibly relaxing even more as silence envelopes the room.

You crawl right into his lap and weave your arms and legs around his torso, a movement when he is completely pliant to. He snuggles right up to you and kisses the top of your hair, sniffling just a bit.

“Baby?”

“Yes, honey?”

“I’m sorry.”

Charlie is sorry for so many things. He’s sorry that he hasn’t slept and he’s sorry that he hasn’t been the man you needed him to be for months. He’s sorry for moping as much as he has and he’s sorry for the fact that practically everything in your lives has been ripped apart in the past year. He’s sorry he can’t fix it.

You pull back and stare at him, then shake your head. “You have nothing to apologize for. None of this is your fault.” You say softly, eyes just as round as his had been and now teeming with tears. “I wish I could make it easier for us, but it’s okay. We’re making it through.”

As Charlie opens his mouth to respond, both of your phones start to vibrate. Notification after notification populate the screens that you scramble to grab and his smile matches yours when you’ve finally digested the news. The election had been called and, to your delight, it was the news you had been waiting for.

The celebration that ensues is not what you had been picturing since Tuesday morning. No champagne is popped. There’s no dancing in the streets for either of you. The television is not switched on again. Rather, the two of you breathe the biggest sigh of relief that you had in months, years even. You settle back down into your snuggling positions and even cry a little bit. You talk and talk and head to the kitchen to have a bowl of soup together and just be together and take in the celebrations down below.

No, this didn’t change anything for either of you. You knew there was still a long road ahead with plenty of your own trials and tribulations to come as well as those that faced the world in the coming weeks and months. But, despite the lack of change that had occurred in the span of the twelve hours since you had last paid attention to the news, that lack of change and all of the change to come could be concurred with Charlie by your side. You just knew it.

#charlie barber #charlie #charlie x reader #charlie barber x reader #reader self insert #Marriage Story #marriage story fic #charlie barber fic #adam driver #ADCU

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not-majestic-bluenicorn · 3 years

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Crescent || Chapter 14

Fandom(s): ATEEZ

AU: Treasure Hunters

Genre: Action, Fantasy, Sci-Fi

Relationship: Everyone x Everyone, Established Hongjoong x Yunho

Language: English

Status: Ongoing

Chapter WC: 8,567 words

Warnings: Character Death, Stabbing, Fighting, Blood, Aliens, War, Funerals, Kidnapping, Attempted Kidnapping, Mentions of Child Abuse / Child Work, Explosions, Murder Attempt, Robbery, Homeless/Runaway Character, Torture, Mentions of Slavery more will be added.

Chapter Warnings: Mentions of slavery, Mentions of Child Abuse / Child Work.

Summary:

"Are you the Captain of that ship?" The person asked as they retained him, while someone else walked behind him and broke off the handcuffs.

"Yeah..." Hongjoong was still looking around, trying to spot all of his crew members. He managed to see Mingi, Jongho and Yeosang, but more people were still coming. "Who are you?"

"The Resistance, name's Bang Chan, and I'm the leader."

AO3

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Tagged: @angel0taiyo

Author’s Note: Crescent is a project I started a very long time ago, more than a year ago, even. I love this story, but I still haven't finished writing it despite the fact I've been at it for like half a year. I wrote most of the chapters I have so far even before I started posting, because I wanted to continue writing while I posted so that it would be finished without me ever catching up and so you readers would never have to go without chapters... But it's starting to feel like homework. I still love the story but I just, I can't bring myself to continue writing it right now. I'm frankly tired. I've written until chapter 24 but the story is going to be about 35 chapters, so I want to ask you a favor. In my twt there will be a poll, vote on it. The first option means I'm going to continue posting the chapters I have until we get to ch 24 and I have nothing to post and then it'll just stop. The second option means I won't post anything from this chapter onwards until I feel better and start writing again. No matter the option, I'm not going to be writing Crescent for the time being, or any other long fanfics for any kpop group, in the forseeable future, because I'm too tired. Here's the poll, you have 3 days from the moment it is posted to vote. Thank you, and I'm sorry.

After Hongjoong helped the officers determine who was part of his crew, and he had made certain that everyone was safe with him including Seonghwa, their ship was towed. According to the person in charge, they would be taken to a nearby planet part of the Kim Empire. They would be detained there along with the people that had accused them (the slave traders) and they would be interrogated to determine what had happened.

Hongjoong was extremely anxious, and he hated not being in control of the situation. He did his best to calm his crew down and relay the situation to them in the best of ways, convincing them that everything was fine and nothing bad would happen to them. In reality he didn't know if things would go so smoothly, and he too was afraid.

He was beginning to consider revealing his status as the prince of the Kim Empire when they began to enter the atmosphere of the planet and the shields were activated. He didn't want anyone to know, because it would put him and his soldiers in danger, but he just couldn't see another way out from it. Once they were finally inside of the planet, the ships stopped for a while and the people they had rescued were taken to another ship.

"What are you doing?" Hongjoong asked, because something didn't feel right. He forced himself to not look at Seonghwa.

"Well, you said they were rescued from a slave ship right?" The officer said. "We're going to take them for a proper check up and see if we can gather any information on their identities, since they don't have legal papers with them."

That made sense, but it still didn't feel right that they were being separated. They weren't a part of his crew, but Hongjoong had rescued them, and he felt like he was responsible for their well being until they had made it back to their planets and their families. There was no time to hesitate anymore, he needed to reveal his identity and make sure everyone was safe.

As he attempted to stand up with his hands cuffed behind his back, there was a loud explosion on the ship to their right and he was thrown to his side. Hongjoong incorporated quickly and looked around, trying to determine where the danger was coming from. The soldiers on his ship immediately pulled out their weapons and looked around, looking for the attacker.

There was another explosion in front of them and suddenly everything was covered in dust and smoke. There was coughing as The Crescent's crew members couldn't cover their faces, and then the noise came. Screaming and yelling and fighting as someone else boarded the ship. Hongjoong himself felt someone pull him up and over to the edge of the ship. He tried to fight it, but it was hard to move when he couldn't see or breathe properly.

"Stop struggling!" The person who was pulling him around whisper-yelled at him. "I'm trying to save you!"

"Who are you?!" Hongjoong yelled between coughing. His eyes stung and he couldn't open them properly.

"You'll know soon enough!" The person yelled, hugging Hongjoong close to them as they reached the side of the ship. "Hold on tight!"

And then they were falling, quickly. Hongjoong screamed, he was still handcuffed and he couldn't really hold onto anything, but the other person was grabbing him tightly. They landed on something and bounced up and down until they were finally let on the floor. Hongjoong was put on the floor and then he felt water pour on his face. Someone wiped it carefully until he was able to open his eyes, and finally he saw that they were on another ship, and that people were still jumping onto the net.

He looked up to see The Crescent and the two guard ships covered in a thick cloud of smoke and dust. As Hongjoong processed the situation, he began to panic and quickly looked around, trying to find his crew members and count them. Every person rescued was left at another part of the deck, where they would work on removing the handcuffs and cleaning their faces. Hongjoong made an attempt to run there, but the person that had rescued him stopped him.

"Hey, calm down friend!" The person said. "We need to get those cuffs off of you."

"I need to check on my crew!" Hongjoong complained, not caring that he was still handcuffed and not in a position to do much himself.

"Are you the Captain of that ship?" The person asked as they retained him, while someone else walked behind him and broke off the handcuffs.

"Yeah..." Hongjoong was still looking around, trying to spot all of his crew members. He managed to see Mingi, Jongho and Yeosang, but more people were still coming. "Who are you?"

"The Resistance, name's Bang Chan, and I'm the leader," Chan explained as the other person finished up the handcuffs and Hongjoong was able to move his arms again. "I'll tell you more when we get to land, go look for your crew."

Hongjoong didn't think twice and immediately left. He walked towards the little group while mentally counting heads and making sure everyone was there, trying not to panic because he still hadn't found Yunho. Eventually he found San, Hwanwoong and Siyeon. Seonghwa was also there, and so where all his soldiers. The few people missing came one after another from above, and then, at last, Hongjoong saw Yunho jump with someone else and land safely on deck.

"That's everyone boss!" A man shouted from the wheel.

"Let's get going Jeongin!" Chan shouted back to him.

The ship quickly changed directions and flew at top speed away from the scene. Hongjoong waited patiently until Yunho's handcuffs had been removed before hugging him, watching behind him as they left The Crescent behind. It hurt to see it become smaller as they ran away from the guard, since that ship had become like his home. But at least he and his crew were safe.

The realization came when they were already far away, that the people they had rescued from the slave ship were nowhere to be found. Hongjoong excused himself with Yunho and went looking for Chan. He found him next to the wheel, directing a younger looking boy as he piloted it. He was quick to join them, even though he thought it would probably be disrespectful, but he needed to know what had happened.

"Were this all the people you could save?" Hongjoong asked, looking rather urgent.

"You were the only ones on board according to our intel," Chan explained, confused.

"No, that can't be right... I'm aware that the guards were moving the people we rescued to one of their ships, but you must have seen them..." Hongjoong insisted.

"The people you rescued?" Chan raised an eyebrow. "I'm not understanding, weren't you arrested for attacking a merchant ship?"

"Yes, but we attacked a ship because they were slave traders," Hongjoong explained. "We were taking the victims to another planet to get them home."

Chan and Jeongin looked at each other before Chan nodded and Jeongin went off somewhere. Hongjoong was desperate. They were basically being kidnapped but he had still left people that he considered his responsibility back there, in a planet that they didn't know. And he still had a really bad feeling about everything that was going on.

"When we were listening to their conversation we didn't hear anything about slave traders," Chan explained. He looked more tense than before, like the news had hit him. "They probably changed their code again and we just didn't realize, it takes time to decipher them."

"Why are you attacking empire ships anyway?" Hongjoong asked. He was too stressed about the situation that he couldn't afford to be kind.

"I told you, I'm the leader of The Resistance, that's what we do," Chan shrugged, immune to Hongjoong's angry tone.

"But why?" Hongjoong insisted, tired of playing this game of asking questions.

"I'll explain everything when we arrive, for now, hold on tight." Chan warned him as he pressed a button.

The ship entered warp speed and they accelerated for what felt like an eternity. Finally, they arrived at some mountains, and Chan anchored the ship with practiced movements. Not far away from where they had anchored, there was an entrance into the mountains, a secret hideout, Hongjoong realized. Chan and his people led all of Hongjoong's crew into the labyrinth inside the mountain and provided them with food and blankets once they had made it to the main chamber.

Hongjoong didn't rest until he saw that all of his crew was safe inside the caves. He counted them multiple times and made sure everyone had what they needed, unable to sit still even when Chan insisted that he needed to rest. He only agreed to sit down when Mingi grabbed his arm and looked at him with worried and scared eyes, and he ended up squeezed between Yunho and Mingi.

"Okay, we owe you an explanation since that was basically a kidnapping," Chan said, sitting on top of a rock to make sure his voice could reach everyone else. "My name is Bang Chan, like I told your Captain, and I am the leader of The Interplanetary Resistance here in Silmerion.

"Our resistance wants to destroy the Kim Empire after all the crimes they have committed against their people, one of those such things is the arrest you just went through," Chan explained. "We just learned this from you, but apparently the ship you attacked was for slave trading. Well, The Sailfish is actually owned by the Kim Empire itself. It's one of the ships they use for trading of illegal substances."

Hongjoong exchanged looks with Hwanwoong, who was as tense as him. They were both members of the royal family, and this meant they were in a dangerous situation. However, they were also vastly outnumbered, so they needed to act carefully to avoid attracting attention to themselves. Their soldiers seemed to understand this, because they didn't react and maintained a low profile.

Behind Hongjoong, San had his eyes trained on him and was tapping his fingers nervously against the floor. Just when he had decided he no longer wanted to kill Hongjoong, it seemed like the Universe was throwing even more challenges at him than before. He spared a glance at Yunho and knew that the soldier felt the same as him, tense with the need to protect Hongjoong from danger. San was truly done for.

"At first we thought you were resistance members from another planet, and that you were attacking the ship as part of the protests," Chan continued explaining. "But it soon became clear that was not it when your Captain told me about the slaves. Unfortunately, because we didn't prepare for it, we couldn't rescue them."

"You mean to tell me that the Empire is behind slave trading and transport of illegal substances?" One of the soldiers asked, and Hongjoong had to contain himself to not tell her to keep it down.

"Not only that. They also don't take proper care of some planets, leaving them without money or taking it from them to finance their wars and expansion, one would think some of those planets are more like colonies than rightful states of the Empire."

"Like Merth X-24?" Mingi asked.

Hongjoong turned to look at him in surprise. Mingi was never one to talk in big meetings, or even talk about himself, but this time he looked hurt and like he wanted to speak and let things out. Next to him, Jongho squeezed his hand softly and nodded slowly. Chan was also looking at him with all of his attention, motioning him to speak, to share his story.

"Merth X-24 is a mining planet, we supply a lot of the metals the Empire uses to craft their special weapons and military ships," Mingi explains, face turning red at the attention placed on him. "However we don't get much from it... My community lives in a system of underground caves because the planet is very hot and arid outside.

"A lot of people die in the caves every week, and we have a lot of orphans and elderly people that the community has to take care of, I'm one of them," it didn't hurt Mingi to speak much about the death of his parents. He didn't remember them at all and had grown being taken care of by the community like almost everyone else. "There's no compensation and we don't receive proper education either. I left the planet to find a better job and send money back to the orphanage."

"Thanks for sharing with us," Chan sighed. "Like yours, there's a lot of planets under the Kim Empire left to their own luck even when they provide to it."

Everyone in the crew was dead silent. Hongjoong's eyes were alight with fury, unable to believe what he had just heard from Mingi himself. His own crew, that was now like his family, had suffered in the hands of his father. He had seen it in Yeosang before, and had even heard Jongho's story, but now he knew Mingi and Seonghwa had been victims of it too, and who knew who else in his crew had suffered from it.

Had Yunho's ship also been a slave ship from his own Empire that had happened to be discovered and that they decided to 'rescue' as a cover up? How had Hongjoong been so blind to all of this for so long? He had been so focused always in battling, in not being the shadow of his brothers by making himself a name as a fighter that he had failed all of his people. He was no better than whoever was behind this.

He felt so guilty and so ashamed that coming clean seemed like the best option. His shoulders and back were tense as he tried to come to a decision, and Yunho seemed to sense this, because he grabbed Hongjoong's hand tightly. Hongjoong looked at him and Yunho shook his head almost imperceptibly, telling him not to do it. Hongjoong wanted desperately to come clean though.

"Well, in any case, I think you need to rest," Chan finally said, after a long moment of silence. "Rest here, we'll make sure the empire's guard doesn't come looking for you, and tomorrow we can help you decide what you'll do from here."

Hongjoong couldn't hold it back and he stood up rather abruptly, accidentally pushing Mingi who was sitting next to him. Yunho immediately stood up as well and grabbed Hongjoong's arm, pulling him back. Chan looked at them with interest, a little confused at their change in attitudes. San tensed up behind them and he noticed how every soldier did as well, ready to jump and defend their prince if he decided to act up.

"I-" Hongjoong began to say, but Yunho didn't let him finish.

"I'm sorry, our Captain doesn't feel well after hearing about this," Yunho said, holding Hongjoong's arm tightly. "He's rather sensitive, I'll take him away until he calms down."

Yunho didn't wait for anyone's approval, he just pulled Hongjoong away by the arm, and Hongjoong followed him. San used the opportunity, and while everyone was looking at the pair that had just left, he crawled out of his place and followed them in silence once things had calmed down. Yunho and Hongjoong walked into a deeper part of the cave. It was dark around them, which made it hard to see, but San managed to follow them perfectly.

"Stop pulling on me," Hongjoong complained, tearing his arm away. "We're far enough."

"What were you thinking?" Yunho asked, keeping his voice low to stop the echo of the caves propagating their conversation.

"You heard what they said about the Empire, horrible things have been happening behind my family's back and it must be stopped!" Hongjoong kept his voice to a whisper as well, as much as he wanted to scream.

San was hunched behind a rock formation, ears trained into their conversation. He could see almost perfectly in the darkness, and could hear them quite clearly as well, such was the blessing he had been made with. Soldiers from Lyria 38 were genetically engineered to be better. That was why they were so lethal, and so sought after to complete dirty jobs. They were expensive as well, although San had no idea just what price his boss had put for his services.

"But you revealing your identity will not stop anything!" Yunho grabbed him by the shoulders. "It'll just get you killed, you heard what they said, they want to overthrow the government."

"Is it so bad that I want to just apologize to them?" Hongjoong asked, sounding like he was about to cry. "I was ignorant too, I never cared for anything but war, and look what the ignorance of my family has done to them."

"It's not bad, but you won't get anything done if you're dead..." Yunho sighed, pulling Hongjoong into a tight hug.

"It's my fault, that they had to live like that..." Hongjoong muttered. "Yeosang stealing from the streets to get out of his dying planet, Jongho being put into child labor, Mingi losing his parents, Seonghwa and you being victims of human trafficking."

"Hey you don't know that, you don't know if my ship was also from the Empire," Yunho was quick to say, clearly trying to offer him an anchor, to make it a little less worse.

"I don't, but what if it was?" Hongjoong stepped away for a moment. "I feel so ashamed, so regretful... The Emperor and the royal family are always so focused on the war aspect that they leave a great deal to the advisors. We turned a blind eye to things that were more important than war and look at all the pain and suffering it's brought."

San took deep breaths as he tried to keep himself from leaving his hiding. It didn't surprise him anymore that it hurt to see Hongjoong like that, so desperate and angry with himself. He felt bad for Yunho too, who looked lost as his boyfriend was inconsolable, and wanted to step out to help them both. The thing was, San had never helped anyone before, he just knew of death and torture. And even if he had known what to do in such a situation, it wasn't his place.

Despite what Wooyoung had said about eight of them being together, San just couldn't see it. He didn't belong anywhere. He was barely human, a tool created for the work that no one else wanted to do, and despite the fact that he had come to care for the others, it wasn't right for him to be with them. It wasn't right to want to belong. And yet, he had begun to crave it, to yearn for it.

"Hongjoong, look," Yunho said after a moment of silence, as he had tried to find the right words to say. "I cannot erase the burden from you, but we can still solve this. Remember what you said when we were at Tebos, after you learned about its status?"

"That I would go back to my family and make things right," Hongjoong nodded, remembering the promise he had maid to himself.

"We can still do that," Yunho said. "The situation is worse than we thought, but we're looking for the biggest treasure in the universe, right? We can take that treasure back home and convince your family to change things. Use the money for the greater good."

"We don't have a ship anymore, though," Hongjoong sighed, unable to see a way out. "And even if we did, we just lost the map."

"No we didn't," Yunho grinned, pulling out the little box that contained all of their progress out of his coat. "I grabbed it when the empire's ships began the commotion. I now realize they would have taken it away after arresting us, but we were lucky Chan and his people arrived right then."

"You..." Hongjoong grabbed the box carefully, eyes wide in surprise.

"I wasn't going to let all the progress go to waste, after all Yeosang and San have worked hard on it," Yunho smiled.

San crouched back down when he heard his name, heart beating fast thinking he had been discovered. Of course he hadn't, but Yunho had already proved to have a sharper eye than most. San was actually certain that Yunho had seen right through him all this time, from the moment he had stepped onto the ship, maybe the only thing that had kept him alive was that he had never confirmed San's original intentions.

"Besides," Yunho continued. "I know it's important what you're doing for your brother."

"This stopped being about my brother some time ago, let's be honest." Hongjoong smiled sadly, softly patting the pocket where he kept the compass. "I loved him so much, he was my role model, but I now realize he might have not been better than me. I have an opportunity to change things now, he would like this better."

"That I'm certain he would," Yunho nodded.

"Alright," Hongjoong said with a sense of finality. "It's decided, we have to get that treasure and save this Empire before it is too late."

"That's what I'm talking about," Yunho smiled and leaned down to press a soft kiss to Hongjoong's lips.

"Let's go back, I need to ask San and Yeosang to help me finish with the map, we were so close to being done before we were detained," Hongjoong smiled with renewed energy.

San knew he must return now, as they would probably find it weird if he wasn't there with Yeosang to help with the map. His heart was beating fast, thinking about the possibilities. Someone out there was trying to kill Hongjoong and he was the only one who knew, yet he didn’t know enough to be able to protect him. He must figure it out and help Hongjoong.

"You know, Hongjoong looked really affected about what Chan said..." Yeosang muttered.

Him, Mingi, Jongho and Seonghwa were sitting apart from the rest in a little group. Yeosang hadn't wanted Seonghwa to join them, but Mingi had insisted on not leaving him alone and Yeosang had been too weak to deny it to him. Jongho nodded in agreement before looking at Mingi and patting his leg. Mingi was looking down, probably from everything he had shared about himself.

San arrived at that moment and the others greeted him briefly, asking him where he had been. He gave a brief excuse about just wanting some time for himself and they left it at that. San was grateful that they didn't ask for more, because he didn't feel like making more excuses, like lying even more.

"I'm sorry about your parents," Jongho said after a moment of silence, because he truly was.

"It's okay, honestly I didn't get to know them," Mingi shrugged. "I'm more worried about all the kids I left behind, my little siblings."

"What were they like?" Yeosang asked, resting his head on his knees.

"There were a lot of them, and most were very playful," Mingi smiled. "They liked bedtime stories, especially the story about how I lost my leg." He chuckled softly at the surprised faces of the others

"They made you tell them a story about how you lost your leg?" Seonghwa asked, confused and slightly disgruntled about the confession.

"Honestly, it's not as bad as it seems," Mingi shrugged. "To them, it makes me a hero, they never made me feel self conscious about it. I'll tell you about it if you want to know, I think I don't mind with you."

They nodded. Mingi seemed more open to share about his past now that he had talked in front of everyone in the ship and the resistance, now that he didn't have to keep things for himself. And they wanted to know more about him, to hear what he had wanted to say. It wasn't easy for Mingi to speak, it had never been, but now he felt listened to.

"We were never given better equipment to deal with the mines, despite the fact that we know the empire has the technology for it, but we always remained unsafe..." Mingi explained, giving them a little background. "That day when we were at the mine, it collapsed.

"I made it out at first, but I could hear screaming from the inside, it was a friend of mine..." Mingi shrugged, not really knowing how to put it into words. "Being trapped down there is terrifying, we live underground but we know where our exits are, when a mine caves in.. the darkness is indescribable.

"I went back in for her and managed to get her out, but the mine was still collapsing and I didn't move fast enough, a piece of rock fell on me and trapped my leg," Mingi touched his wooden leg. "It could've been worse."

"That sounds very painful," Seonghwa muttered, glancing at the wooden leg.

"It was, but I don't remember it that well," Mingi smiled. "I honestly don't miss my leg, and I was just one more victim of a mine collapsing, not a big deal."

"You're very brave to say that," Jongho said, "I think I would've been scared if I had lost an arm while working as a child."

"As a child?" Yeosang asked, a little confused.

"Yeah, I've been working in ship building since I was a child." Jongho explained. "I've been an orphan since young, and I'm honestly not sure how I got to the orphanage in the first place, but a lot of us were adopted into child labor. I know of others who were sold by their parents."

Mingi leaned on Jongho's shoulder, the only way he knew of offering comfort. Jongho's voice didn't express what he actually felt about how he had grown up, and was almost indifferent. Mingi still offered comfort, because he didn't know what else to do and he knew Jongho would never ask them for any kind of support.

"It wasn't that bad, I like to think I grew up well..." Jongho tried to shrug it off, to not let the others know of the abuse he had gone through with his voice. "Plus I learned and became an expert in ships from there, and that's what got me into The Crescent, it's not all too bad."

"What do people have with being cruel to children?" San scoffed, Jongho's story having hit close to home. "They always make a show of protecting children but then turn a blind eye..."

"Do you want to share?" Yeosang asked carefully, noticing that San was tense and probably angry.

They had all put on a show of being scared of San at first, but for what it mattered, they had never actually seen him angry at anything. Not even when Yeosang had sneaked into the ship. San shook his head. He couldn't reveal to them where he came from or what he was to begin with, but he also didn't care to go digging around his feelings. There were more important things to do.

"Alright," Yeosang nodded, dropping it once he saw San was not in a good mood.

"Was it hard for you to live on the streets?" Mingi asked Yeosang, still leaning on Jongho's shoulder.

"A little," Yeosang shrugged. "To be honest I began spending a lot of time out when my father left us, the biggest change was just not having a roof to sleep under."

"Why did you put yourself through that?" Seonghwa asked, a little wary about even talking to Yeosang, but genuinely curious.

"My mom's abuse," Yeosang replied, although his tone gave away that he didn't like Seonghwa prying, even if he hadn't been the first to ask about it. "It became too much, she got angry every time she saw me. I decided to just leave on the streets until I could get enough money and get myself a ticket out of Tebos."

They all nodded. Mingi could remember the state of Yeosang's house when they had gone back for his stuff before taking off. The house wasn't in too bad of a shape, but it was easy to tell that it had fallen into abandonment as no one took care of it. It didn't look like it was completely devoid of life, but it looked like whoever lived there had long stopped caring. It had been a sad view, especially to him who was always used to being around a lot of people.

"What about you?" Yeosang asked Seonghwa next. "How did you end up in The Sailfish?"

"I was running away from home as well," Seonghwa shrugged. "It's none of your business though."

"Come on, you made me say it," Yeosang scoffed. "Why were you running away?"

"I made you share nothing, I asked a question and you chose to reply," Seonghwa frowned, not liking his insistence. "I'm choosing not to reply to your question."

"Come on, the rest of us shared our stories, don't be like that," Yeosang insisted, raising his voice a little.

"Yeosang..." Jongho warned him, but he didn't listen.

"Just tell us," Yeosang said again.

"Why are you forcing me and not him?" Seonghwa asked, clearly annoyed as he pointed at San.

"Because I don't trust you," Yeosang answered truthfully. "Everyone else that was rescued was content with the idea of going back home, why did you decide to stay? It's suspicious and I don't trust you."

"Fine, want to know why I don't want to go back?" Seonghwa raised his eyebrow, gesturing openly. "Imagine being called stupid and useless by your family your whole life, being denied things and overprotected as if you're unable to take care of yourself just because your brain is a little fucked up and I can’t read. I can do everything perfectly, I don't need anyone." Seonghwa crossed his arms, defensive. "I was tired of my brother making my life impossible every day, and despite everything that happened in that ship, I don't want to go back. Why don't you go back to the abuse of your mother, huh?"

Everyone was left speechless by Seonghwa's outburst. Seonghwa took a deep breath before closing his eyes and massaging his temples. He felt embarrassed about his secret being exposed like that. He knew he was not what his brother had said to his face or what his father had whispered behind his back; he was smart and could memorize long texts after someone read them to him. He was good with numbers too. But he couldn't help but see his own shortcomings.

"I'm sorry," Yeosang said, to the surprise of everyone else. "I acted like an asshole, and I'm sorry."

Mingi sat up straight again and scooted closer towards Seonghwa, grabbing his hand tightly and smiling at him. Jongho smiled, because he knew what Mingi was thinking, and also because everyone else's confusion amused him. Especially Seonghwa, who was staring at Mingi's hand probably wondering what was going on.

"I can't read either!" Mingi exclaimed, and Yeosang and San both looked at him in surprise. "I never learned how to, and although I'm sure our situations are very different, I think we're both good enough as we are."

Seonghwa looked up at him and smiled back, softly squeezing Mingi's hand. It was comforting, despite the fact that their situations were different like how Mingi had said. But he was right, it was enough just like that. Seonghwa knew he was much more than his inability to read, and he would show his parents that much.

"It's okay Yeosang," Seonghwa said finally, looking at the other. "You were indeed an asshole, but I understand why you wouldn't trust me, so it's fine. Let's try to put it behind us."

"It doesn't help if you call me an asshole just like that," Yeosang retorted, eyes narrowed down on Mingi's hand still holding Seonghwa's.

"Stop it, both of you, Captain Hongjoong is coming this way," Jongho muttered quickly, swatting at both of them.

San looked up at Hongjoong and Yunho as they walked towards them. They had taken their time to look for them as they had said previously and he worried that he might have missed something important. The situation was delicate for everyone, but San was a few steps ahead from everyone and he feared he would mess up. He had never been worried about failing before, but now there were lives he cared about at stake, and he felt fear.

"Yeosang, San," Hongjoong said. His tone was optimistic, and San wondered if it was a facade or if he truly felt hopeful again. "Yunho was really smart and brought the map with him, I need you to help me finish it."

Yeosang immediately shot up from his place, face relieved as his and San's work was still safe. San was quick to pretend to be surprised as well, although not to the extent of Yeosang, but he couldn't let the others notice that he already knew about the map. He stood up as well and let Yeosang pull him away to work on the map with Hongjoong, leaving the others behind.

Everyone watched them leave before Jongho suddenly stood up and motioned Mingi to do the same as well. Mingi followed, carefully letting go of Seonghwa's hand and letting Jongho take him away after excusing both of them, leaving Yunho and Seonghwa alone. Yunho sat in front of him with a smile and Seonghwa looked sheepishly at him, a little disoriented and vulnerable.

"You alright?" Yunho asked, leaning back. "Rough first day as a crew member."

"Don't mention it," Seonghwa sighed.

"Don't worry too much, we'll make it through this one," Yunho smiled. "Hongjoong always finds a way out, even if he sometimes needs a little push from me."

"You don't address him as the Captain?" Seonghwa asked, a little confused.

"Oh man, you still have so much to learn about this crew," Yunho chuckled. "But don't worry, if everything goes well, you'll get used to it in no time."

"Why did you take us away?" Mingi asked once Jongho had deemed they were far away enough and stopped walking.

"I'm going to say something to you, but you don't have to give me an answer right now," Jongho explained, rubbing his hands together.

"Okay?" Mingi didn't really understand what was going on, but if Jongho had something to say to him, he would listen.

"I'm starting to like you, as more than a friend," Jongho began, keeping it simple and direct. "You really don't have to tell me anything right now, I just wanted to get it out of my chest, I guess."

"But I-I..." Mingi stuttered.

He felt confused. What was there to like about him? He didn't have an important role in the ship and he was lacking in many ways. He was often afraid of everything and wasn't particularly smart or capable, there was nothing good about him that Jongho could like. Why was he confessing something like that at the moment?

"I don't get it," Mingi said. "There's nothing of me for you to like."

"Of course there is!" Jongho immediately interrupted him, not willing to let Mingi put himself down like that. Especially in front of him. "There's so much of you for me to like. You're so kind Mingi, so kind and so caring that you're willing to put yourself at risk for others."

"I'm not, I'm a coward..." Mingi shook his head, in denial.

"That is not true, you spoke up for Yeosang back when they were thinking of handing him over," Jongho grabbed both of his hands. "Even when you had to speak against the Captain and against the First Mate, you didn't hesitate."

"But-"

"And just now when you revealed your secret to the others in favor of comforting Seonghwa, that is not an easy thing to do." Jongho insisted, reminding him of the things he had done. "You also talked to Hongjoong about the dream you had, which helped save Seonghwa and others' lives in the end."

"But I had to ask for your help to do that..." Mingi retorted, feeling small.

"Yeah, and asking for help is also brave," Jongho smiled. "We can't do everything by ourselves, and admitting that in the first place is a huge thing. You asked for my help, but I did nothing except be by your side.You did it all by yourself."

Mingi looked at him with wide eyes. Jongho was earnest and honest, he just couldn't see any trace of lies in his words, and it made him overwhelmed in many ways. Mingi knew he wasn't necessarily bad. He was good at his job as a miner and that had always been enough, but it was the first time he had been described like this by someone. It made him feel more special than when the kids he took care of called him a hero.

"I really don't need you to reply to me right now, we're not in the best of situations," Jongho continued after a moment. "Plus, I know your heart is kind of divided right now." He smiled, making Mingi blush for being put in the spotlight like that. "I hope you know I don't mind if you like others, or if you don't like me. I just wanted to let you know you're special."

"I-" Mingi was speechless. He had never received a love confession before, how was he even supposed to reply to this? "I don't know what to say."

"I don't expect you to say anything, don't worry." Jongho smiled, letting go of his hands. "Let's go back now."

Yeosang left to find Chan and ask him for a place where they could work, leaving San and Hongjoong alone. They were away from everyone else from the crew and the resistance, just sort of waiting at an empty space, hidden from the eyes of others. San knew this would be the perfect time to complete his mission. He could kill Hongjoong and just run away, and by the time the others realized what had happened, he would have made himself disappear.

He tried to envision himself doing it. This was the golden chance he had been waiting for since the beginning of his mission, so he tried to imagine himself ending Hongjoong's life. It was not a surprise that he couldn't picture it. Hongjoong trusted him and even gave his back to San, but San couldn't reach for the knife in his pocket and slice his throat. He hadn't been able to for a while.

Hesitation felt foreign to him. He had never doubted when performing in missions before, which had made him a prized weapon, expensive and sought after. And yet here he was, with the only person that had managed to disarm him. Although to be fair, he was certain he wouldn't be able to kill any of the others Wooyoung had mentioned if he was asked to.

Was that the reason? Had Wooyoung's revelation been the reason he had failed to kill Hongjoong? It sounded possible, but San knew that wasn't it, because he had begun to hesitate even before that dream. What that dream had done to him though, was make him nervous. Someone had seen through him and now it felt like just about anyone could do it, like he was exposed and vulnerable and therefore in danger. Of course, Wooyoung had an advantage because he could simply walk into people's dreams, but it was still messing with him.

"Are you okay?" Hongjoong asked, snapping him out of his thoughts.

At some point he had turned around to look at San, maybe had asked him something even, but San had heard or noticed none of it. He wondered what face he was making for Hongjoong to look so worried. His heart shrunk painfully in his chest as he mentally asked Hongjoong to not look at him like that, because he couldn't take his kindness any longer. San was absolutely, royally fucked.

"Nothing is wrong, I'm just tired after all that went on just now," San lied. At least he could still do that properly.

"Do you want to go rest?" Hongjoong still looked worried though, maybe even more than before. "Yeosang and I can start on the work and you can join us later when you feel more rested."

"No, it's fine." San shook his head quickly. "The map is more important, we can all rest later when we're done with it."

"Nothing is more important than your well being." Hongjoong was quick to say.

San felt his heart break a little more inside his chest. Please don't do this, he thought, because it hurt when Hongjoong was nice to him, and San wasn't used to emotional pain. He could withstand all sorts of injuries to his body, but he had long forgotten what it felt like to truly hurt inside, and he didn't want to remember.

"Go rest, before I make you myself, and you can join us later." Hongjoong insisted with a smile, pushing San softly back towards where the rest of the crew was.

He obeyed, because he didn't think he could actually keep a facade up much longer when he was hurting so much inside. His training and the way he had been raised had broken his spirit long ago, but being part of The Crescent's crew was putting it back together, and the process hurt far much more than the breaking had. They made him feel human, and accepted, and he didn't know if he liked that.

Jongho was sat on the floor, thinking about the conversation he had held with Mingi, when a ragged doll fell on his lap. He looked up, finding the sharp eyes of a young man around his age standing in front of him, smiling at him. Jongho looked down and grabbed the doll. It was a very worn out dog, missing an ear and a beady eye, and it's previously white fur had become gray with age. It was incredibly ugly, but Jongho's chest swelled with recognition at it. He stood up quickly, grabbing Sunwoo by the shoulders and looking at him in the eyes. Sunwoo's smile grew bigger before he was pulling Jongho into an embrace. He was alive, they both were, despite what had seemed to be a huge improbability.

"You fulfilled your promise," Sunwoo whispered next to him, and Jongho held him even tighter.

"You're okay," Jongho said in return. "How are you here?"

"The Resistance rescued me, many years ago, from the orphanage," Sunwoo explained, shrugging a little bit after they put distance between them. "I tried looking for you to take you with me, but there was not enough time and I didn't know where to even start looking... I'm sorry."

"It's okay," Jongho reassured him. "I am where I'm meant to be now, with my crew." He looked down at the plushie again, and smiled. "You kept it."

"It was our promise," Sunwoo nodded. "So... How did you end here?"

"It's a long story..."

Hongjoong was admiring the vastness of space when he felt a tap on his shoulder and the scene broke apart. He turned around, confused, but realization dawned on him when he saw Wooyoung standing in front of him. The other looked tired and antsy, like he hadn't been able to rest well despite the fact that he spent most of his time sleeping. For all that Hongjoong was mad at Wooyoung for never coming back to tell him the truth, he couldn't help but worry.

"Are you okay?" Wooyoung asked, his voice full of worry. Hongjoong felt bad, because he was the one that should have asked when Wooyoung looked like that.

"We're fine," Hongjoong assured him quickly. "You look terrible, though, are you okay?"

"I'm fine..." Wooyoung sighed, rubbing his face. "I think it's because I've been messing with my sleep schedule in order to meet with all of you more."

"You should stop doing that," Hongjoong sighed. What was it with people around him not taking care of themselves?

"I can't, our meeting will be soon and I have keep an eye on many details..." Wooyoung looked at Hongjoong for a moment before sighing. "I guess an explanation is due, but first tell me if everyone in the crew is safe, yes?"

"We're all okay, I promise, even Seonghwa." Hongjoong reassured him again. "It wasn't a pleasant experience, and we don't have a ship any more, but it could've been worse if you hadn't warned me about it."

"I'm sorry, I should've been quicker, but you'll get the ship back, don't worry," Wooyoung sighed.

"How do you know that?" Hongjoong muttered, still a little uncomfortable with the fact that Wooyoung just seemed to know so much.

Without replying, Wooyoung moved his hands and the emptiness turned into a small bedroom. The Somnum went to sit on the bed, rubbing his temples and looking even more pale than he had before. Hongjoong knew this was taking a toll on him, but he also wanted answers, and Wooyoung was finally willing to give them to him.

Hongjoong sat down on the bed next to him, hesitantly putting a hand on Wooyoung's back and rubbing it comfortingly. Wooyoung smiled weekly at him before stretching and bringing his hands together in front of his mouth, like he was considering something. He probably didn't know where to begin, and Hongjoong couldn't blame him.

"You might have figured this out by now, or not, but I'm a Somnum." Wooyoung said first, because he figured that was the best way to begin. "We have prophetic dreams at some point in our lives that reveal to us what our destiny is, and you were in my dream."

"That is..." Hongjoong didn't know how to describe it. He didn't know exactly how he felt about being in someone else's dream, not that Wooyoung could control that, it was just that Wooyoung semed to know so much about him but Hongjoong didn't know about him.

"This is a replica of my room, where I first had my dream about the seven of you." Wooyoung gestured openly, and Hongjoong looked around.

"Right, you said they're all in my ship right now, that you're the only one that's missing." Hongjoong nodded, remembering the short discussion they had had before Wooyoung warned him about the raid. "Who are the others?"

"Well, you'll be glad to know your boyfriend is part of this," Wooyoung smiled at Hongjoong's surprised face. Yunho had never mentioned any weird dreams to him. "I haven't visited him yet 'cause he scares me, but he's part of it. You already know about Yeosang and Mingi as well, because you helped save one and the other told you about the slave ship."

"I assume Seonghwa is also part of this, since you asked me to protect him," Hongjoong began to draw conclusions. "But that only makes six of us, who are the other two?"

"That would be San and Jongho." Wooyoung nodded, satisfied that Hongjoong was easily catching up. "I haven't visited Jongho's dreams though, haven't gotten a chance with how quickly everything has happened."

"But you've visited San?" Hongjoong asked, a little curious to know how the other was doing, since San hadn't seem to be doing well lately, and he couldn't figure out why.

"Yes, he didn't take very kindly to it..." Wooyoung sighed. "I'm sure he'll get over it soon though."

Wooyoung fell back on his bed and closed his eyes, rubbing his eyelids softly. He felt so tired. He had been getting a lot more visions lately, as the most important point in their mission approached, and he hadn't gotten proper rest in a long time. He now knew who was behind Hongjoong's assassination plans, but he couldn't just reveal something like that. Telling the wrong information to Hongjoong would probably ruin everything.

"So, why are the eight of us important?" Hongjoong shifted slightly so he could look straight at Wooyoung.

"We'll influence what is to become a very important historical event..." Wooyoung muttered, but his voice faltered.

"I suppose you can't tell me yet, right?" Hongjoong sighed. Even if he was beginning to understand how this situation worked, it didn't lessen his curiosity, his want for knowledge.

"Not yet, or it could ruin everything." Wooyoung looked at him apologetically, but Hongjoong dismissed it with a smile. "Just keep an eye on them, okay? Keep them close."

"I will, don't worry." Hongjoong nodded, already compromised.

He didn't know why he trusted Wooyoung so much to begin with. They had met only three times, taking this one into account, but Wooyoung had shown that he had only the best in mind for them. Plus, Hongjoong felt so lost now that they were without a ship. He no longer felt the power he had felt before, instead, he felt like he was disappointing his older brother. He wasn't a Captain anymore, but he couldn't be a prince either, so who was he?

"You know Hongjoong," Wooyoung sat up and grabbed his hands. "For the amazing leader you are, you doubt yourself too much." The compass that Taejoong had given him materialized on Hongjoong's hands, and he gasped a little.

"Can you hear my thoughts?" Hongjoong asked, a little confused and surprised.

"A little, your thinking is very loud." Wooyoung smiled. "Have a little more trust on yourself, we will need your guidance." Absentmindedly, he brushed a strand of hair away from Hongjoong's face, the other hand still holding Hongjoong's.

Wooyoung knew so much about them through his dreams, and he had slowly begun to fall for all of them. It became confusing to visit them in dreams, to keep in mind the true status of their relationship. He couldn't help but forget sometimes, the lines of reality and dream becoming a bit blurry. Hongjoong didn't seem to mind though, as he stared at Wooyoung's face, his heart beating a little faster.

"Don't forget you're more than just your title," Wooyoung said with a smile, putting both of his hands down on his lap. Hongjoong nodded, still at a loss for words. "I don't mind if you tell Yunho about this dream by the way, I'm planning to meet all of you soon and finally explain some things." Wooyoung stood up from his bed and stretched.

"Are you leaving now?" Hongjoong asked, standing up in a hurry.

"Yeah, I'm really tired," Wooyoung smiled. "I'll be back soon though, take care."

And so, Wooyoung was gone. Hongjoong stared down at the compass in his hands and remembered the words of his brother. The situation had become bigger than he could have ever imagined, and he felt sorry and lost, but Wooyoung was right, Hongjoong was more than just a prince or the captain of the ship. He didn't know what the future had in store for him and the others, but he knew he would overcome it no matter what.

#kwritersworldnet #kdiarynet #kpopscape #8makes1teamnet #ateez #ateez fanfic #ateez fic #ateez fanfiction #atz #kpop #kpop fanfic #kpop fic #kpop fanfiction #crescent #bluenicorn writes

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magpiemorality · 4 years

Text

Bring It On, Moceit/Moremus, 5/5

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5 AO3

We’re here; the final part. The happy ending, hopefully…

Huge thanks to @littlestr for the original prompts! And thank you all for following along with this fun weekend jaunt, I have come to adore these boys and they’ve outgrown the little prompt oneshot they were supposed to exist in, constantly yelling at me for more attention until now we’re here. There’s even art HERE by @sometimeswritingsometimesdying go look at it!!!!

Without further ado; please enjoy.

Warnings: dismissal of polyamory (character doesn’t believe it’s real/feasible), swearing

Patton Sanders was the prettiest boy in the whole college...

***

Patton Sanders was the prettiest boy in the whole college. He wasn’t being vain or anything; there had once been an online poll on the college gossip blog and he’d won hands down. It was just fact at this point.

He was also currently (in his own internal poll) the saddest. Everything had been going so great (shut up Remy it had) and then it had taken a turn towards the endgame and then-

Well, what had happened with Remus? Patton still wasn’t sure, and Remus was ignoring his texts so he had no clues to go on apart from the fact that one minute the boy was giving him some very upmarket salmon filets and pulling off a classing hair-behind-the-ear move that would have possibly even led to a kiss- and then nothing. Remus had suddenly… changed his mind? He’d freaked out for some reason anyway, and had just run off.

Since then nothing, nada, total radio silence (yeah so it had only been two days so what Remy shh) and Patton was falling into despair. There had to have been a vital signal he’d missed somewhere that would have turned the whole thing around.

Maybe the fish was a clue?

He and Remy had spent a full evening poring over the fish. Was it a secret message? Symbolic in some way? Was there something written on it? Patton had drawn the line at trying to open it up and check the inside because he still very much wanted to save it to cook for Remus some day, so it had been rehomed in the freezer after a careful perusal of storage methods on Google.

And there was a whole other problem now too- Dex was avoiding him. Over text, on campus, in the cafe; everywhere Patton could think of to try and run into his second paramour turned out to be a bust, and the only way (again, two days was ages Remy don’t be a bitch) he could have avoided even accidentally bumping into Dex for that long was if the other boy was actively staying away.

Those texts went unanswered too.

(Remy was starting to lose patience.)

“But I just don’t-”

“Oh my god gurl please don’t finish that sentence!” Patton’s very best friend and emotional support gay snapped, slamming his Starbucks cup down on the table (situated outside the cafe, so they could be seen by as many people as possible, of course). “I literally can not with you.”

Patton’s nose wrinkled. “My tutor Logan says we shouldn’t say literally when it’s not grammatically accurate.”

“Your tutor Logan can literally suck my dick. No seriously; he’s hot, get me his number and I will consider literally forgiving you.”

“But-”

“Baby, sugarplum, Patty-cake- for the love of all things caffeine; just take a chill pill okay? Boys will come and go in your life and if they’re worth anything at all then they’ll be back. Besides, they’re probably just duking it out over you somewhere. Maybe shirtless. Maybe there’s baby oil…” Remy trailed off with unfocused eyes, sipping his drink absently and Patton sighed, because even that nice (very nice, saved for later) image not enough to dispel his melancholy.

He checked his phone again for the millionth time that day. Spring break was coming up and the cheer squad Whatsapp was going wild with anticipation, but Patton wasn’t in the mood. He’d foolishly hoped that one of his handsome men was going to sweep him off his feet and away to somewhere spectacular for the holiday, but that hope had tanked dramatically in light of recent developments. Normally that would’ve just made him shift his hopes towards prom, but it wasn’t enough of a big deal as it had always been in high school, and it was really more of a friends’ night out situation. Not the sort of time to be expecting big dramatic declarations of love, you know or whatever.

No, the universe seemed to be spelling out ‘Patton Sanders is going to die alone’ pretty hard, even if Remy wasn’t in agreement.

“Who are you texting, anyway?” Patton asked, picking at his nail polish with a pout. “Let me at least live vicariously through you until I waste away, a tragic damsel whose beauty was lost to time…"

Remy looked up, talking around the straw in his mouth. “Jesus you’ve got it bad. And it’s none of your business, P, I’ll tell you when you aren’t moping.” The way Patton visibly and genuinely sagged seemed to revive Remy’s best friend sympathy instincts, because he quickly finished his drink, took Patton by the hands and pulled him up. “Come on cupcake, it’s the weekend and we’re going shopping. Because no matter what happens with your boys- it’s nearly Spring Break and we are gonna look hot to trot!”

And who was Patton to disagree with such flawless logic?

***

Maybe there was something to be said for the mystical powers of retail therapy, because when Patton flopped down on his bed that evening there was a text notification from a blocked number on his phone that made his heart beat wildly.

It contained an invitation, to meet the following weekend at a destination that would be sent in a future text, and it was signed ‘from your not-so-secret admirer’.

The week went by horribly slowly. Even practice seemed to drag, and yet…

Suddenly Dex was meeting him every day with his tea again, no word of explanation but a soft smirk always hovering around his lips, lighting up his usually serious face.

Suddenly Remus was watching and winking at him from across the gym- not approaching this time round but offering little shy waves and offering help when he could, putting away the gym equipment or offering a protein bar on the way out just as Patton’s stomach started to rumble.

Something was up, and Patton’s head was in a spin, but it was oddly perfect.

Even Remy couldn’t believe the change.

“You’re totally one hundred percent sure they’re not on drugs?” Patton shot him a look. “Okay just double checking. Joined a cult? Kidnapped by aliens and replaced by pod people? Serial killers planning on luring you in an-”

“God, Remy, no!” He hit his friend with his pillow, laughing at the offended noises Remy made before he joined Patton in giggling on the bed. “No I think they just… sorted something out. It’s weird though, right? Like there’s something weird happening? Not bad weird, but…”

Remy mirrored his shrug. “You’ll have to wait and see what happens with your ‘not so secret admirer’,” he said, singing the name. “Do you have any clue which one of them it is?”

“Well no. But surely it’s Dex? I mean, he’s Dexter, he can sort out a blocked number. It’s… Remus is a total carebear but he’s not exactly James Bond, you know? It’s got to be Dex. But he’d just out and say it, I know he would, so I don’t- I can’t be sure. Remus is the dramatic one…” Round and round in circles they went but never came any closer to solving the puzzle.

Friday came and went and at long last it was time to head out for the grand reveal. Remy had helped him get dressed (cute but weather appropriate and with good running shoes, just in case) and they were waiting in the living room for the address to come through.

His phone buzzed.

Once they’d stopped shrieking in excitement they googled and found the address was of the same cafe he’d spent so much time in with Dexter over Winter break, which- it was probably not a good thing that his heart had sunk over ruling out the possibility this was Remus all along, right? It had simultaneously skipped a beat at the confirmation that it was Dex, so… You win some, you lose some he supposed.

Crunch time.

He hurried along the streets- glad for the tiny size of their college town and for the lack of rain on the crisp February morning- and slipped into the cafe. Only to see not Dexter O’Reilly sat inside waiting for him, but-

“Remus?!”

***

Let it be known that Remus Duke was not the prettiest boy in the whole college, far from it. Nor was he the most intelligent, nor the richest nor the most popular. However what Remus Duke had in spades was earnest charm. It was lethal in a one on one situation, and he made sparing use of it so as not to abuse his power.

Let it also be known that Dexter O’Reilly was far from immune to said charm, especially when it was turned on him from a few feet across a brightly coloured, messy, but shockingly cosy room in a frat house on Greek Row. If Dexter was the Slytherin here then Remus was almost certainly the Hufflepuff who would drive said Slytherin to world domination.

In this case, of course, world domination was replaced by Patton Sanders, and the prospect of getting to date him. The concept was the same though, and the intense level of detail required to get the plan exactly right was too.

In fact, Dex had stayed way later that night than either of them had expected, as they’d plotted and planned and discussed various ways of making their dreams reality. What Remus lacked in book smarts, he made up for with an innate talent for asking exactly the right questions to fix any inefficiencies or problems before they ever arose, and you bet Dex had made a mental note of that for future reference.

What neither of them had really considered, was the exact reaction Patton would have when he walked in the cafe door on Saturday morning to find not just Remus, but-

***

“And Dex!” Patton’s eyes were big and round as they switched back and forth and back and forth between the two young men. He clutched his phone in his hand like a lifeline, wondering if this was going to turn out to be the worst day of his life so far, rather than the tentative best he’d pencilled it in as…

“Hey,” Remus smiled hopefully at him, standing up and awkwardly trying to gesture Patton to his seat like a magician’s glamorous assistant or something. Patton took pity on him and did in fact sit, still mostly set to ????? and !!!!!! and only just managing to process what was happening.

Opposite him, Dexter crossed one long leg over the other, and Remus perched on the edge of the third chair like he was physically restraining himself from getting up to go be closer to Patton. Which wasn’t entirely untrue, as it happened.

“Guys, what’s going on?” Patton asked weakly, looking to Dex for guidance, but it was Remus who replied.

“Well,” he started, twisting his hands around nervously. “We ended up having a bit of a chat, last week. I um, I- oh fuck what was I supposed to say?!” Dexter snorted softly and Remus pouted at him. “You’re no help, we said we’d do this together!”

You could’ve knocked Patton over with a feather. His mouth actually fell open at the display of camraderie. Suddenly the serial killer theory had merit.

“Patton. Through a convoluted set of circumstances we ended up discussing our possible futures… with you. It’s fairly clear you’re struggling to choose between the two of us, right?” He waited until Patton nodded slowly. “So we thought… why choose?”

“My brother Roman told me about this class he took last semester see, about like, changing identities or something. People, basically, and he heard about all these different things they never taught us in school! And one of them was-”

“Wait,” Patton interjected, holding a hand out because he was ninety percent sure he knew where this was going, but- “That’s real? Having… sharing partners is real? It actually works?”

“Hey how’d you know what I was going to s-”

“Yes, darling, yes to all of that. If the people involved are honest and open and willing to work on it,” Dexter interrupted, smiling at Patton. Remus was also looking at him, nearly bouncing in his seat with excitement, overflowing with energy like always. Gosh Patton loved his energy, his enthusiasm for life, his potential, ahem, stamina…

He turned back to Dex, only to be filled with warmth at the look he was getting, because he loved the way Dex gave him special smiles he gave no one else. He loved his soft, clever words, and his gentleness.

Oh.

“Oh.” There was quiet for a moment before the two hopefuls shared a concerned glance.

“Patton?” Dexter prompted. “Is that… a good ‘oh’ or a bad one? We uh, we know it’s kinda not what you were expecting, probably?”

“And you can take your time to think about it!”

“Thank you Remus, yes. You can take your time, darling. But we would like to try this with you. However you like. And if we want to change things down the road… we can talk about that too.”

Patton was the prettiest boy in the whole college. Seemed like today he was the luckiest, too. “Yes!” He shouted, leaping out of his seat to grab them both in a hug, dragging them together forcefully. “Oh gosh, goodness, yes, that sounds perfect!” He gave them each a kiss on the nearest cheek and sat back down, cheeks red but smile bright, holding his hands out for them to take one each.

“This is going to be so cool!” Remus crowed, and Dex chuckled softly at his exuberance, squeezing Patton’s fingers, his eyes betraying his own quiet excitement.

Yeah, Patton thought. It really was.

Bonus 1 | Bonus 2 | Bonus 3 | Bonus 4

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vexedtonightmares · 5 years

Text

La Fin Des Temps Chapter 7 (Elu Hogwarts AU)

Vendredi 18:48 - “How did your date go?”

Manon had dragged Lucas along to the inter house unity meeting against his will. Clearly, she had been under the impression that, since he had come to the first one, he would come every week. He’d skipped the one the week before, mostly because he didn’t really want to watch Daphné try to teach everyone how to use a smartphone when she barely knew herself.

Daphné was setting up a way for them to watch a movie, apparently, having run a poll on her Instagram story to see what activity she should plan for the meeting. Lucas supposed this wasn’t the worst way to spend his night, even if he would have rather been lying in bed thinking about Eliott or, even better, having another patronus lesson.

Things had been back to normal between Lucas and Eliott since the weird moment they’d had earlier in the week, but they hadn’t talked about whether or not Eliott would be at this meeting, so Lucas decided to send him a message.

lucallemant: Are you coming to the inter house unity movie night?

He turned his phone over in his hands while he waited for Eliott to reply, startled when someone slipped their hands over his eyes. He grinned slowly. Eliott?

He pulled the hands from his eyes and turned to greet Eliott. “Salu-- oh,” he faltered when he realized it was just Arthur.

“Jeez, don’t be too excited to see me. I only came because Manon sent me pictures of you sitting there looking all lonely,” Arthur said, taking a seat beside Lucas on the floor. Lucas turned to glare at Manon even though he was glad for the company.

“Where are Yann and Basile?” Lucas asked, scanning the room.

Arthur shrugged. “On their way, probably. Yann was finishing up some assignment, I swear to god he’s never not working, and Basile wouldn’t miss a chance to see Daphné somewhere she can’t avoid him. Have you seen Eliott?”

“No, why?” Lucas was glad Arthur had brought up Eliott, he hadn’t wanted to be the one to ask. Eliott hadn’t been at lunch or dinner, but Lucas just assumed he was caught up in his dormitory working on his schoolwork.

“Just haven’t seen him all day, even in our dormitory. I left a note for him to meet us here but… eh, whatever. Maybe he’s off with the person he’s so in love with,” Arthur grinned, wiggling his eyebrows.

Lucas coughed, not sure he had hear Arthur correctly. “He has a girlfriend? Why hasn’t he said anything to any of us?”

“Oh, no,” Arthur said dramatically, “He’s not dating anyone but he’s sure as hell obsessed with someone. Talks about them all. The. Time. It would be kind of annoying if it weren’t so endearing.”

Lucas wondered who it could be. Eliott had never said anything about liking anyone when they had hung out. Was he trying to keep it a secret? Clearly not, if Arthur knew so much about it. In fact, Arthur was still talking, doing a terrible impression of Eliott.

“Arthur, I couldn’t pay attention in class today because of them. Arthur, we had the best conversation today but I don’t think they feel the same about me. Arthur, their eyes are so pretty. Supermodel eyes, he calls them. Do you know any girls with supermodel eyes?”

Lucas felt his blood boil. Not that it mattered, but supermodel eyes were their thing, his and Eliott’s. The fact that Eliott couldn’t focus in class because of some girl and her supermodel eyes made him angrier than he wanted to admit. He realized Arthur had asked him a question. “I don’t know anyone with supermodel eyes,” he said coldly.

Arthur shrugged, not catching Lucas’ tone. “I’ll ask Yann and Basile. Actually, maybe I’ll ask Alexia, she might know.”

“Why would Alexia know?”

“Oh, right, this mystery person is most definitely in our potions class,” Arthur clarified. “He freaked out all night after we did the Amortentia potion-- nice one, by the way, Imane told me you had no idea what we were brewing-- because he thought he’d been too obvious and given away who he was talking about and that they didn’t feel the same way. I told him he shouldn’t have shared what his potion smelled like with the whole class, but he said he didn’t want you to be the only one who shared. Maybe it worked though, and he’s with his mystery girl right now.”

Lucas was saved from having to respond by the arrival of Yann and Basile plopping down beside the two of them. “What are we talking about?” Yann asked, and Arthur began to fill him in on their conversation about Eliott and the girl he liked. Lucas tuned them out to the best of his ability.

He couldn’t, however, refrain from checking his phone to see if Eliott had opened his message. He hadn’t. Lucas’ stomach churned at the confirmation that, wherever Eliott was and whoever he was with, Lucas was the last thing on his mind.

“Nox,” Daphné said, turning the lights out and letting the movie broadcast itself on the wall in front of them. Apparently, they were watching Star Wars. Not the most Daphné-like choice, but a movie that made him glance at Yann out of the corner of his eye. Yann grinned back, likely remembering their first year bonding over how they were going to be like Jedi once they learned how to do magic.

He let himself enjoy the movie instead of overthinking where Eliott was and who he was with any longer. It was almost a relief, actually, to know for certain that Eliott wasn’t interested in him like that. Sure, he would have preferred a different outcome, but at least now he could stop wondering if Eliott had sat by him at lunch on his first day because he liked Lucas, or if he had asked Lucas to practice patronuses as a way to spend time alone together. Those things had just been friendly, a way for the new kid to get to know someone.

Basile fell asleep about an hour into the movie, head in Arthur’s lap. Yann and Lucas were very offended that their friend had the audacity to fall asleep during Star Wars, so they got their revenge by posting a few photos on his Instagram account with captions and comments that were sure to be un-Daphné worthy.

When the credits rolled and the lights finally turned back on nearly everyone was stretched out comfortably, some asleep, some with heads on their friends or significant others’ shoulders. Basile woke up blearily and tried to pretend he hadn’t been asleep for nearly the entire movie, which was doubly amusing given the fact that he had no idea what Star Wars was and kept trying to explain parts of the movie that he hadn’t seen.

“Luke Skywalker and Princess Leia have got to be the end couple, right? Especially after that, uh, that one scene, you know what I’m talking about, with the uh, space flowers,” Basile rambled. Yann and Lucas exchanged glances behind his back.

Lucas checked his phone again, proud of himself for having avoided doing so until the movie ended. Nothing. Eliott still hadn’t even opened the message. Where was he?

“Lulu, you coming?” Yann had blanket he had brought slung over one shoulder, following Basile and Arthur as they continued to argue about Star Wars.

“In a minute, I should help Manon clean up,” he responded, wanting a moment alone. Yann flashed a thumbs up before leaving him alone. Soon it was only Lucas and the girls left.

“That went well?” Daphné looked to all of them for confirmation, and everyone nodded their heads vigorously.

“It was awesome,” Manon confirmed.

“So great,” Emma added.

Alexia nodded. “Best movie night ever.”

“By next week this club will have everyone in the entire school joining,” Imane said confidently. The girls looked to Lucas expectantly.

“Hm? Oh, yeah, it was really cool Daphy. The guys were just saying how much fun it was.” He might complain about Daphné sometimes, but he really did admire her. In just a few weeks this club had become one of the most popular clubs in the school.

She beamed at him. “Really? Eliott didn’t show up, so I didn’t know if there was something wrong…”

Daphné blushed when she said his name. It seemed he wasn’t the only one with a hopeless crush on Eliott, though that didn’t come as much of a surprise. It was weird to think that he and Daphné would have similar taste in guys, though…

“Don’t take it personally, Daphy, he’s out on a date.” Sure, he didn’t know this for a fact, but the more he repeated it to himself, the less it hurt. Well, in theory. Lucas caught sight of Imane studying him out of the corner of his eye and he did his best to ignore her. Yeah, she clearly knew what his Amortentia had meant. “I’m sure he’ll be at the next one,” he added quickly, just in case Daphné got upset.

There were footsteps and suddenly Eliott was standing in the doorway, slightly out of breath. He looked around the room, face falling. “Oh… is the movie night over?”

“Yes, we finished about ten minutes ago. It was Star Wars, everyone enjoyed it a lot,” Daphné said stiffly.

“Fuck. I’m sorry, I really wanted to come.” Eliott was looking at Lucas as he spoke, but Lucas pretended to be busy folding other blankets students had laid with during the movie.

“It’s fine,” Daphné said, warming considerably. It was the Eliott effect. “There will be more movie nights.”

Eliott broke into a wide grin. “I sure hope so. The inter-house unity club is where all the cool things happen, right?”

“Right,” Daphné smiled, ducking her head to hide her blush.

Eliott shifted from foot to foot. “To say sorry, why don’t I finish cleaning up for you guys?”

“Oh, no don’t worry about it, we’re almost done anyway--” Daphné started, but Eliott cut her off.

“No, no, I insist. You’ve done enough. Lucas can help me finish.”

Lucas raised his eyebrows at Eliott, not wholly pleased to be dragged into clean up duty, especially given the messy state of the room. Eliott merely smiled in return, probably due to the lasting high of his date.

“Ok…” Daphné said hesitantly. “Call any of us if you change your mind.”

“Will do.”

With that, the girls took the few items they had brought and filed out of the room, chatting amongst one another, leaving Lucas and Eliott alone.

“You do realize what you’ve volunteered for, right?” Lucas clarified, gesturing around the messy room.

Eliott laughed. “You do realize we’re wizards, right?”

Oh. Yeah. They were, weren’t they?

Eliott cast a few quick spells, debris and dust disappearing as blankets folded themselves and food crumbs vanished from the floor. “That was easy, wasn’t it?”

Eliott made magic look so effortless, like they weren’t just words he was speaking, but a fundamental part of him. Lucas was never able to connect like that to his magic, to feel like it was a part of him. He wished he was, that he felt it deeply in his soul. He wasn’t even sure if he felt anything deeply in his soul at all. At least, not like Eliott did. Lucas held Eliott’s gaze for a moment before his eyes snagged on something in the corner of the room that he hadn’t noticed before. Eliott followed his eyes.

“Did you know I can play the Star Wars theme on the piano? I would show you but I don’t want to impress you too much.” Eliott was closer to him now, teasing grin on his face. Lucas wasn’t paying attention to Eliott for once, eyes still on the piano in the corner. Maybe there was something that made him feel connected to the deepest parts of his soul. He walked over to the piano without sparing Eliott a glance or response, sitting on the bench and running his fingers over the smooth keys. He pressed down on three of them, just to see if the piano was in tune.

“I must say, my Star Wars cover is better,” Eliott joked, sitting down beside him.

“Mmm,” Lucas mumbled in response, trying to call up the memory of a piece he had played long ago with his mom who was no longer his mom. How simple things had been back then, before his dad left and his mom was committed and he was put into the system, only to be scooped up by a different set of parents who still cared too little.

He tested out the same three keys, this time adding a fourth. Yes, this was right. It was all coming back to him now. Closing his eyes briefly, he let instinct take over, playing the song that reminded him of the life he had lost, but the best parts of that life. Sitting with his head on his mother’s shoulder as she played, memorizing her movements, running around outside with his mother and father, basking in the warm air, singing with his mother in the kitchen as she made dinner, not noticing when his father barely showed up or refused to sing along.

Lucas became swept up in the music, fingers hitting the keys softly, but intentionally, performing with a bliss he hadn’t remembered existed until that moment. It was only when he felt something brush his shoulder that he remembered Eliott was sitting beside him, watching, listening. He also remembered what the song was called. I love you. He hoped Eliott wasn’t too versed in contemporary classical music.

The song was nearing the end, Lucas hadn’t even realized he’d played the whole thing already, so he tapered off, letting his fingers trail the last few notes gently. The silence that filled the room when he finished was charged with energy. He was too scared to look at Eliott, see his reaction to the impromptu concert he had just given.

“C’etait ouf,” Eliott said, voice thick with an emotion Lucas couldn’t place. He couldn’t tell if Eliott was speaking French on purpose or because he was too dumbfounded to find the words in English. Maybe he was impressed, Lucas thought foolishly.

Eliott cleared his throat and spoke again, still in French. “T’es surprenant.”

Lucas couldn’t help it, his head snapped up to meet Eliott’s eyes, stunned by the emotion they held when he looked into them. Eliott’s eyes told him everything he needed to know, and suddenly Lucas didn’t feel so self conscious, didn’t worry about the girl that Eliott was mad for.

Eliott’s eyes flicked down to Lucas’ hands, still resting on the keys. “J’aime bien les gens surprenant.”

Lucas didn’t know what to say to that, so he just held Eliott’s gaze. Something passed between them, something Lucas didn’t have the energy or ability to tell himself meant anything other than what he wanted it to. Before his brain could get too far ahead of itself, Lucas blinked and looked away, breaking contact.

“How did your date go?” he asked, forcing the words out. They tasted bitter on his tongue.

Eliott responded with what sounded like genuine confusion. “My date?”

“Yeah, with your mystery girl. Arthur told me about her, said you won’t shut up about her.” Lucas tried to keep his voice light, teasing. This was how friends talked to each other about who they were dating, right? Eliott didn’t answer right away, so Lucas looked up at him again, trying to gauge what his response would be.

Eliott looked caught between emotions, partially amused, partially confused, and partially afraid. “Arthur told you… and where did Arthur get his information?”

“From you? He said you talk his ear off about some girl in our potions class every night. If you aren’t careful he might try to feed you to Brian.” Was he doing ok at this platonic teasing thing? Or was it coming off weird? Well, they did like weird, he supposed. Lucas was so caught up in his own thoughts that he almost missed Eliott’s response.

“Even if I did have a mystery date… who said it would be a girl?”

All the breath went out of Lucas’ body at once, almost as if Eliott had punched him in the stomach. Had he said what Lucas thought he’d said? That couldn’t be right. There was no way…

But maybe there was. Eliott had sat by him in the Great Hall instead of anyone else. Eliott had told him he had supermodel eyes. Eliott had gone where he’d gone, had followed him to make sure he was ok on multiple occasions, had listed the smells of his Amortentia when Lucas had been embarrassed by listing his. Eliott had followed him on Instagram. Eliott had laid on the floor with him and drawn a hundred variations of his patronus just because he wanted Lucas to know he cared.

No, Lucas told his brain, stop it. Just because Eliott had said his mystery date wasn’t necessarily a girl, it didn’t mean it was Lucas. He was just teasing Lucas, seeing how he would react.

He looked up at Eliott and saw Eliott looking back. Lucas took a deep breath, and opened up the windows to his soul, letting Eliott see what was inside and do with it what he pleased. Neither of them were laughing anymore, all traces of humor gone from their faces. Lucas was serious in how he felt, and he wanted to know if Eliott was serious too. Am I the one you talk about at night?

Then Eliott opened up his eyes, his soul, at least a part of it, to Lucas, and the world was destroyed and rebuilt all within that single glance. Lucas saw himself reflected in Eliott’s eyes, but it wasn’t totally him. It was a version of himself that he didn’t realize existed, someone surprising, someone beautiful, someone worth loving. There was no mystery girl in Eliott’s eyes, only Lucas, and Eliott, and Lucas and Eliott.

I think I might kiss him, Lucas thought to himself, I think I might kiss him right here on this piano bench. They were already close, but not close enough. Lucas inched forward, bit by bit, taking much longer than he probably needed to, but still trying to work up the courage. He noticed Eliott was doing the same. He tilted his head up slightly, realizing he would have to do so to reach Eliott’s mouth. The thought was exhilarating to him for no reason at all. He realized then that maybe his life had been leading up to this moment. He had never met a person like Eliott before and he didn’t think that he ever would again. Everything before Eliott had been fake, had been Lucas wanting to live but being too scared. He didn’t think he was scared anymore.

Their noses brushed and Lucas closed his eyes slowly, savoring every moment. Eliott’s hand came to rest on his on top of the piano keys, their lips were so close, not even a breath of air between them. He felt like he could taste Eliott already. It took all of his willpower to not just grab Eliott by the face right there and join their lips, hungry and desperate. Lucas swallowed, jaw clenching slightly. Not afraid, never afraid with Eliott. Their top lips brushed…

“Oh thank goodness you guys are still here!”

They shot apart in an instant; Lucas nearly fell off the piano bench. Their intruder hardly seemed to notice, or care. Daphné was smiling at them, oblivious to everything she had interrupted.

“I left my prefect badge in here, did either of you see it while you were cleaning? Where did that piano come from?” She bent down to search the floor for her missing badge. Eliott hopped up off the piano bench, holding something small out for Daphné to take.

“I found this when I came in, but I didn’t know whose it was,” he offered. Lucas watched as her face went from worried to relieved, though he himself couldn’t feel anything but angry with her. It wasn’t her fault, but still.

“Thank you Eliott! You’re a lifesaver! I can’t imagine, if I would have lost it for real… I’d never live it down. Anyway, what are you two still doing here? You did a great job on cleaning up!” She smiled at the two of them eagerly. To his credit, Eliott smiled back. Lucas couldn’t make his face muscles do anything other than grimace and try not to show that he was hexing Daphné in his head. “I’ll walk out with you,” she finished.

Lucas waited for Eliott to refuse her offer, to tell her that they still had work to do before they left, but he simply nodded and looked to Lucas for confirmation, eyes duller than they had been a moment before. Had Lucas imagined everything after all?

He finally got up from the piano bench and made his way out of the room, trailing a few steps behind Eliott and Daphné, who were engaged in a conversation about the next inter-house unity club meeting. In the entry hall, at the bottom of the stairs Daphné turned to them both with a sad smile.

“I guess I have to leave you, my common room is by the kitchens, you know. Thank you so much for coming to movie night, Lucas, and thanks for helping clean up and finding my badge Eliott. You give inter-house unity a good name.” She kissed them both on the cheek before parting, nearly skipping her way to the Hufflepuff common room.

Lucas didn’t know what to do now that he and Eliott were alone again. “Walk you back to your common room?” Eliott suggested, gesturing a hand to the stairwell.

Lucas laughed, “Our common rooms are right near each other. You’re walking that way anyway.”

Eliott shrugged. “My mystery potions girl didn’t argue when I walked her home earlier,” he said with mock seriousness. Lucas laughed again and shoved Eliott lightly, making him stumble as they started up the stairs. The responding look Eliott gave Lucas almost made up for the fact that Daphné had interrupted them earlier. Almost.

Eliott was so full of light, brighter than the sun. Every look he gave Lucas was unique only to him, a secret the two of them shared. Lucas hoped that Eliott felt the same way, but he didn’t know if anyone, himself included, was physically capable of the rare beauty Eliott exuded and shared just by existing.

“Wait a minute,” Eliott said as they were halfway up their fifth set of stairs. Neither one of them had been moving particularly fast, but they were both a bit out of breath. Eliott steadied himself by placing a hand on Lucas’ shoulder, laughing through breaths. “Who designed this place?”

“Who decided we can’t apparate inside the castle grounds is a better question,” Lucas countered, “We’d get to classes so much faster. Not that I can apparate yet anyway.”

“No?” Eliott asked bewilderedly.

“Uh, no? You have to be seventeen. I don’t turn seventeen until July. Plus, apparition lessons for sixth years don’t start for a month or so.”

“Oh, right,” Eliott said, picking up his pace. Lucas hurried to try to match him, a difficult task on his much shorter legs.

“Are you going to do the apparition lessons?” Lucas asked once he caught up, then cringed internally. “I mean, of course you are, we can’t take the test unless we take the lessons.”

Eliott didn’t look at Lucas as he spoke. “I already have my apparition license.”

“Oh,” Lucas said in surprise, “That’s cool. Were the rules different at Beauxbatons?”

“No. I’m seventeen.”

Lucas waited for Eliott to elaborate, but it became clear after a moment that he wasn't going to. He tried not to feel disappointed. If Eliott didn’t feel like sharing personal details at the moment, he didn’t have to. Lucas changed the subject, joking about whether Harriet would rather murder Eliott for not paying attention in potions than unfollow him on Instagram. The relief was palpable off of Eliott when Lucas changed the subject, and Lucas tried not to worry about why.

Soon, too soon, they stood in front of the portrait of the Fat Lady, the entrance to Lucas’ common room. “Thanks for walking me back, I know it was really out of the way,” Lucas joked.

Eliott smiled, less luminous than before. This smile had a more serious quality to it, almost like Eliott was bracing himself for something. His eyes flicked to the portrait and back to Lucas’ face. “This is where we say goodnight, then.”

“This is where we say goodnight, then,” Lucas repeated.

They stood there for a beat, just looking at one another. Tell me, Lucas urged, tell me now that I’m not making all this up. Tell me that you want this as much as I do. It was Eliott who looked away first. “Goodnight, Lucas.”

“Goodnight, Eliott.”

Eliott walked a few steps before turning back to look at Lucas over his shoulder. Similarly to the other day, Lucas was standing exactly where Eliott had left him. “Thank you,” Eliott said. It wasn’t what Lucas had been expecting, though he didn’t totally know what he had been expecting.

“For what?” He was genuinely curious.

“For showing me your soul. It’s the most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen,” Eliott answered simply. Lucas blinked in surprise as Eliott turned away once again and didn’t look back. That night Lucas would dream of pianos and Eliott and the universe and everything in between. He would see himself the way Eliott saw him, and he wouldn’t be afraid or ashamed of what he saw.

Then, he would wake up in the morning and forget he had dreamt anything at all.

Chapter 1 Chapter 2 Chapter 3 Chapter 4 Chapter 5 Chapter 6

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Weekly Instagram Roundup: Week 1 Week 2

#elu hogwarts au #skam france #elu fic #lucas lallemant #eliott demaury #la fin des temps #this was a loooong one #sorry but also not #elu #instagram au

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yasbxxgie · 6 years

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In the wake of Kavanaugh’s confirmation, the consequences of the 2016 election are settling in at a whole new level for white women. As a result, many are revisiting the post-election statistic that showed 53 percent of white women voted for the candidate who spewed racial vitriol and actively emboldened violence against people of color, tolerating his vile misogyny in the process.

We know Trump’s election only exposed more brazenly what’s always been true: White women have always sided with white supremacy.

Now we’re reckoning with another devastating truth, and this one pertains to all white women—including that other 47 percent of us. If we had ever collectively worked to create sustained solidarity with women of color, instead of consistently aligning with white men, we wouldn’t be in this mess to begin with. Why? Deep, robust multiracial women coalitions would be an unstoppable force.

Another report knocked the wind out of some us. Though swarms of white women rose up publicly enraged, it was only among women of color that a clear and strong majority believed Christine Blasey Ford. A Quinnipiac poll showed that white women only broke 46 percent for Ford (and 43 percent in favor of Kavanaugh, a statistically insignificant difference). On the question of whether Kavanaugh should be confirmed anyway, 45 percent of white women said “yes.” Wow.

Here we sit, with ever more evidence that massive racial failure on the part of white women is at the center of this political crisis. At the root of it all is our collective choice to not learn, prioritize, or consistently live in public antiracist solidarity with communities of color, and especially with women of color.

In short, we’ve never bothered to learn calculus.

(For clarity’s sake, please know I’m purposely not talking about white men — yes, the ultimate perpetrators — here. I am not blaming white women for white male violence. I am also not disparaging the incredible courage of all survivors, including Blasey Ford. I am simply focusing on what white women collectively do and do not do, have and have not done, when it comes to race, racism, and antiracism.)

This is where (one) peril sets in. The longstanding failure to choose calculus that allowed this crisis leaves us wholly unprepared for a political moment where nothing less than brilliant mathematical abilities are required.

For women of color, that cuts deeply.

As we reel, more white women seem to say, “Oh shit! I really do need to learn calculus.” But women of color don’t have the time, energy, or patience to teach us. They certainly can’t trust us. And while women of color have distinctly individual perspectives on and responses to white women in this current moment, it’s safe to say that collectively they’re beyond outraged and all but done with us. Why? Because they’ve been demonstrating the life-or-death urgency of white women learning calculus for decades now.

And yet here we are.

Ongoing apathy toward making the work of antiracism a central priority of our lives as white women has allowed the school building to burn.

My fellow white women, there is nothing not bad about this moment.

Calculus is hard to learn in a regular and relatively calm school situation. Now we need to learn calculus in a school building that’s on fire.

Even for the most willing and earnest student, there’s no way around it: It takes a long time to learn calculus. And, yes, so many of us are deeply hurting, furious, raw, triggered, and afraid. But the building’s still on fire.

Students, sometimes have to actually screw up math problems to actually learn calculus. Screw ups are part of any learning process. But, again, the building’s on fire. And every white woman’s mistake pours more gasoline on a blaze that’s consuming us all very quickly.

The task here is as essential as it is herculean. We need to stop pouring more gasoline on this fire at the same time that we get belatedly serious about the long, slow, mistake-laden work of learning calculus—and we have to do it at lightning speed.

From one white woman to another, here are 10 concrete steps to take right now if we hope to ever do math with women of color—which is not optional if there is any hope of calling into existence the deep, robust, multiracial coalitions all our lives depend on.

No particular order here. Some of these steps fall in the category of “for the love of god, stop pouring gasoline!” Some fall in the category of our long, slow work. None are adequate. All are critical.

1. Stop saying ‘women’ anything.

When the phrase “women must…” or “women are…” is about to come out of your mouth: Stop. Commit to the discipline of being racially specific in your speech. “White women must…,” “white women are…,” or “women of color and white women seem to be…”—at which moment you may notice, “Oh, wait. I really can’t say anything about women of color because I don’t know.”

You may not understand why this discipline is important. Do it anyway. It’s important because there is no non-racialized woman. Committing to this practice will make you more likely to notice gaps in your awareness. You’ll be more likely to notice the racial assumptions embedded in your own claims. This will help you gain clarity about where you need to focus as you do your homework. It will also necessarily rein in your claims about “generic” women, which is one small but critical way to stop pouring gasoline on this fire.

2. Do not participate in any public action called by white women with a reflexive ’yes.’

Stop, seek out, and then listen seriously to what women of color say about it first.

That “women’s blackout” action? Serious douse of gasoline. Yes, a very small number of women of color in my life sent me the invitation, too. (Remember. People of color don’t speak in one voice on anything.) If more white women had slowed down and listened to what women of color had to say publicly about all the problems with that “black out,” well — I don’t need say more about its problems. Go read what feminists of color themselves said about it. They were clear.

3. If you didn’t take a knee during the anthem in support of Black lives for the last two years, don’t share the meme suggesting all women and girls should now take a knee (see item number 2).

Even better, invite other white women sharing this meme into public conversation about why this is a problem. Don’t yell at them. Ask them to talk it through.

But make sure some version of what’s wrong with this does get explained: If we haven’t been taking a knee for Black people already, then kneeling now exposes whose humanity we actually care about. Not to mention white people co-opting a Black people-led movement is a problem, along the lines of what happened to Tarana Burke. Gasoline.

4. Transfer the vast majority of the time you spend reading and engaging in media to reading and engaging with feminists of color.

Literally and almost exclusively read feminists of color (feminist men and other genders of color too) every single day as you try to figure out what the hell is going on in our country right now. Don’t worry, you’ll still get the news. But, you’ll get it through the analysis you’ll need if you want to move beyond basic addition. Do an audit of who is in your feed; choose to follow the many diverse and brilliant people of color who are public thinkers, writers, and activists. Engage their knowledge and wisdom (and their disagreements with each other). When you don’t understand what they’re saying or why they’re saying it—keep reading. Know that it’s going to take a while before the basic vocabulary of calculus makes sense to you. But it will come, if you stick with it.

5. When women of color write about white women, do not privately message them with questions or rebuttal…

…Unless they explicitly tell you they are cool with that.

If they invite public response and you decide to say or ask something, cool. But be ready then to just sit and listen deeply to the response, whatever it is. If the response makes you uncomfortable or isn’t in the tone you were hoping for, don’t proceed to tell them how it made you feel (more gasoline). Sit with those feelings and then keep reading, thinking, and engaging. If you need to talk about those feelings, cool. Find another white person who’s also trying to learn calculus—maybe someone who’s been at it for longer than you have—and talk it through with them. Then keep reading and listening and sitting with your feelings some more.

6. Don’t just sit there with your feelings. Take your actual physical self to an organization led by people of color who are working for justice—and show up in person.

(Assuming that organization welcomes white participation, of course; most do.)

Don’t say you’re too busy. If you volunteer at your kids’ school, do stuff for your church, are part of a book club, spend time on Facebook, whatever else—this is the moment to transfer hours in your given week from white people (even time spent at your own kids’ school; your kids are going to be fine) to people of color.

The obvious reason for this is to put more labor toward the disproportionate heavy-lifting people of color are already doing for justice. The added benefit is that you’ll start to learn calculus in a way that reading alone doesn’t make possible. Show up. Do what is asked of you. Listen carefully. Don’t overspeak. If you’re uncomfortable being one of the few white people in that space, good. Do it anyway. Don’t flake out.

(Join the NAACP—they’re doing voter mobilization all over right now. Put in volunteer hours to people of color groups working to decrease the presence of police in schools. Get active in a sanctuary network for which Latinx activists are calling the shots; white people with citizenship are needed desperately for all kinds of work. Show up. Wherever people of color live, they are organized and acting. Figure out where and go.)

7. Read ‘So You Want to Talk About Race’ by Ijeoma Oluo.

Seriously, do this right now. If you have the means, buy a copy for another white woman in your life; for all the white women you know. Read it alone. Read it together. Talk about it. This book is a crash course in calculus. It’s brilliant, truthful, funny, loving, difficult, nuanced, and more. Read it with your teenager. Ask your teenager what they think about it (start inviting them to learn calculus, too). See if your co-workers will talk about it with you over lunch.

8. Make a concrete commitment to reallocate resources to women of color organizations. Donate to women of color running for elected office.

Now I am talking about money. This part isn’t so much about you and calculus. It’s just the right thing to do. It also may be the best hope we have to save this “democracy.” I don’t mean that in a “women of color are going to save us” kind of way. But, seriously, we don’t get to just run around giving Facebook shoutouts to Black women voters in Alabama for saving us from predators like Roy Moore, and then not go all in for them. We owe women of color something, and this includes being all-in in terms of having their backs as they step up and out into leadership (taking huge risks as they do so). We owe actual time, energy, and resources. Get your white women friends (and the men) to give money too. Do it.

9. Some white women, white queer folks, and a handful of white feminist men have been working for a long time to learn calculus. Find and follow them, too.

They are imperfect and make mistakes. But being white and trying to learn calculus is different from being a person of color and learning calculus. There are unique challenges. Your learning will speed up if you engage some of the white people who have been on this learning journey for a while.

Be careful who you listen to. Vet those white people to be sure their calculus-learning is legitimate and on the right track. See who they’re in dialogue with. Notice what feminists of color say to and about them. (Hint: If mostly only other white people like their work, don’t learn to do math the way they’re doing it.) Find the white folks who are obviously in relationships of accountability with people of color—these people do exist. Get with them.

10. Take an inventory: Where do you shop? Who cuts your hair? Where do you take your kids to the dentist? Where do you eat out?

Find ways to move your personal participation in the economy over to Black, Latinx, and other businesses owned and operated by people of color. This includes medical offices, stores—as many establishments as you can. Urge others in your life to do so, too. This not only actively reallocates resources you are already expending to communities of color and their economies, it also brings you into more frequent contact with people who our deep and wide white-segregated enclaves typically prevent us from being in contact with.

That’s no quick math formula. But it is critical pre-context for calculus-learning.

***

Here we are.

When you’re in a burning building, every step you take must be purposeful. We’re not going to be collectively calculus-fluent anytime soon. We’re also going to have to live with the consequences of our collective behavior. Namely, we’re going to be divided from women of color for a very, very, very long time. And there are no guarantees here. When I said there is nothing not bad about this moment, I meant it.

But I also know this. Standing still in a burning school building isn’t an option. And I know there are lots of white women and white queer folks (and a few white feminist men) right now who want to take purposeful steps. As much as we don’t quite know what to do, don’t totally get it, are ourselves hurting, fear making mistakes that pour gasoline—there are many of us ready to roll up our sleeves and learn the math. Let’s get purposeful. Together.

If this is you (and I commit to you, it is also me), know you are not alone. I offer this essay in a spirit of love, anger, urgency, and partnership. Let’s pull out our pencil and paper now—and a shitload of erasers. And let’s get to work. [x]

#jennifer harvey #ijeoma oluo #so you want to talk about race #white women #black women #race #racism #medium #white supremacy #white men

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theliberaltony · 4 years

Link

via Politics – FiveThirtyEight

Welcome to FiveThirtyEight’s politics chat. The transcript below has been lightly edited.

sarah (Sarah Frostenson, politics editor): President Trump may still not be out of the woods with his coronavirus diagnosis — he is back at the White House now after three days at Walter Reed National Military Medical Center and still receiving treatment — but the vice presidential debate is moving ahead as planned.

There are a number of new precautions in place for the debate, too, given the renewed focus on the coronavirus, including a hotly disputed plexiglass barrier to separate the candidates and no handshakes upon arrival.

We have less of an idea this time around about which topics Vice President Mike Pence and Sen. Kamala Harris will debate, but without a doubt the coronavirus will be front and center — in fact, it might be hard for other topics to break through in the 90 minutes they have.

So let’s start there.

We know from our poll with Ipsos before the last presidential debate that the coronavirus is the most important issue to voters here in 2020, and that most voters think Biden is better on the issue.

On COVID-19, almost everyone prefers Biden

Share of people who named each issue as the most important one facing the U.S., and whether they think Trump or Biden would handle that issue better, according to a FiveThirtyEight/Ipsos poll

Who’s better on the issue… issue share TRUMP biden COVID-19 31.7% 19.5%

–

78.8%

–

The economy 21.6 79.1

–

19.6

–

Health care 7.9 22.0

–

76.1

–

Racial inequality 7.4 8.4

–

86.6

–

Climate change 5.2 2.6

–

96.4

–

Violent crime 4.8 79.3

–

17.7

–

The Supreme Court 4.5 50.7

–

47.8

–

Economic inequality 3.0 15.1

–

76.8

–

Immigration 2.8 70.1

–

29.9

–

Education 2.6 52.1

–

45.9

–

Abortion 2.3 96.0

–

2.1

–

Gun policy 1.9 66.9

–

30.3

–

Other 1.6 55.1

–

43.5

–

Respondents who didn’t name a top issue are not shown.

Data comes from polling done by Ipsos for FiveThirtyEight, using Ipsos’s KnowledgePanel, a probability-based online panel that is recruited to be representative of the U.S. population. The poll was conducted Sept. 21-28 among a general population sample of adults, with 3,133 respondents and a margin of error of +/- 1.9 percentage points.

How do you see the conversation around the coronavirus playing out tonight? What will be Harris’s stance? Pence’s? This will be the issue tonight, right?

meredithconroy (Meredith Conroy, political science professor at California State University, San Bernardino, and FiveThirtyEight contributor): Yeah, Sarah, there’s little doubt that coronavirus will be the issue tonight. After months of Trump trying to downplay the virus, Pence will be forced to grapple with it more directly, given the president’s recent diagnosis.

nrakich (Nathaniel Rakich, elections analyst): I would be shocked if the debate doesn’t kick off with the coronavirus and spend a substantial amount of time on it. And I am really curious to see whether the share of Americans who say that the coronavirus is the most important issue to them rises in our Ipsos poll. I haven’t seen the new data yet, but it will be available to you, dear reader, on the live blog tonight!

Specifically, I’m curious to see whether the share of voters who back Trump and prioritize the coronavirus rises. There was a big partisan split on the issue last time, with Democrats far more likely to say it was their top issue.

meredithconroy: That will be interesting to see. I think it’s possible it is still below the economy for Republicans in the poll, though. The administration hasn’t really changed its tune on the severity of the virus, despite the president’s diagnosis, right? In fact, you could argue their messaging is even more reckless?

nrakich: Right — in fact, the president has downplayed the severity of the virus in the last couple days, tweeting “don’t be afraid of Covid” and taking off his mask when he returned to the White House.

sarah: Does Pence lean into that messaging, then?

nrakich: I kind of think he will try to walk it back. Pence is kind of the ticket’s “what the president meant to say was …” ambassador.

meredithconroy: Right. And Pence comes at this from a somewhat different position than Trump — he is charged with leading the White House Coronavirus Task Force. I’m not sure that means he echoes guidelines from the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, or corrects his boss’s recent tweets and messages, though.

In fact, perhaps foreshadowing what to expect, Pence’s spokesperson, Katie Miller, already chided Harris’s camp for asking for more precautions at the debate, saying, “If Sen. Harris wants to use a fortress around herself, have at it.”

nrakich: A more interesting question might be, how hard does Harris attack Trump for this? She has a lot of material to work with (e.g., not wearing a mask, not taking the proper precautions to prevent spread among White House staffers), but will it come off in bad taste?

perry (Perry Bacon Jr., senior writer): Doesn’t seem too hard for Harris to say, “I wish the president good health,” but then harp on his failures in dealing with the virus.

And I don’t expect Pence to walk back a ton of what Trump has said or done. The kind of non-Trump Republican position on the coronavirus has been: “We can’t shut down the country in fear of this virus, kids need to go to school, our economy can’t be closed,” and I assume Pence will say versions of that throughout the debate. It’s a more polite version of what Trump says, but not necessarily all that different.

meredithconroy: Yeah. I think you’re right, Perry.

nrakich: I don’t know about that, Perry. The polls suggest people are really turned off by Trump’s blasé attitude toward the virus.

I think Pence will want to counter the perception that Trump isn’t taking it seriously — which by definition I think involves telling people to, well, “worry about Covid” (though of course not in those exact words).

meredithconroy: I think it’s possible they’re past that now, Nathaniel, given that Trump is doubling down on downplaying the seriousness of the virus.

sarah: If anything, Pence might want to actively pivot away from conversation on the coronavirus as much as he can, because this is something Trump has consistently gotten poor marks on:

nrakich: That would kind of be the strategy we saw at the Republican National Convention? Try to change the subject to something like the pre-pandemic roaring economy or democratic socialism. It’s harder to do in a debate, though.

meredithconroy: Yes. I think Harris would want to keep the focus on the coronavirus and those most affected by it. Plus, she’s a good messenger for that. More women than men are facing job losses, and Black communities account for a disproportionate number of deaths.

sarah: But if you’re Pence, maybe pivot to something like talk around an upcoming vaccine, or the upcoming Supreme Court nomination?

meredithconroy: Speaking of messengers … Pence is a great spokesperson for the SCOTUS nomination, as a religious liberty conservative.

perry: A debate with a lot of focus on COVID-19 will be bad for Trump-Pence. So I would assume the moderator, to show balance, will harp on some subject that is designed to make Harris look bad. My assumption is this will be about abolishing/defunding the police. Also, Biden kind of non-answered on abolishing the filibuster and adding seats to the Supreme Court in the last debate, so I would assume that is a subject that Harris will be pushed on, too.

sarah: That’s a good point, Perry. And I can see how a debate around the Supreme Court could possibly back Harris into a corner, too, if Pence is adamant about the GOP’s timeline to confirm Amy Coney Barrett before the election, which might push Harris into saying something about increasing the number of justices on the court.

nrakich: Harris is also on the Senate Judiciary Committee and was a big Brett Kavanaugh opponent. Pence may try to accuse her of obstructing Republican-appointed judges out of hand.

But again, the polls are not on Republicans’ side here. Most Americans think the Senate should wait until after the election to confirm a replacement for Justice Ruth Bader Ginsburg.

perry: Only 32 percent of Americans support adding justices to the Supreme Court, compared to 54 percent opposed, in a recent ABC News/Washington Post poll. At the same time, a 6-3 court might strike down Biden’s entire legislative agenda. So I would assume Harris wants to stay vague on that issue, as Biden has.

nrakich: Why do you think they are being coy on that, Perry? I don’t really get it.

Even in a dream Democratic scenario, there won’t be enough votes in the Senate to pack the court anyway. And as Perry said, polling shows most people are opposed to it. So saying “we oppose court packing” seems like the politically expedient answer.

perry: Because I think a 6-3 court will be open to striking down any Democratic legislation even on the flimsiest of grounds, so I think they have to keep the idea open.

nrakich: That’s fair. And I don’t think court packing is high on voters’ radar. I just thought it was a weird unforced error by Biden to dodge the question at the last debate.

perry: The Democrats’ actual position is probably closer to: “A Supreme Court that strikes down Obamacare, Roe v. Wade and the Voting Rights Act with Barrett and Gorsuch in the majority is illegitimate, in our view, and we would take action to address that.” I just don’t know if Harris can say that right now.

sarah: I’m surprised either candidate got in anything substantive in the last debate with all the interruptions. But speaking of debates … even though we’re pretty skeptical that debates move the needle all that much (although we did see a slight uptick for Biden following the first debate), do you think this debate might have more of an effect just given the uncertainty around the last two debates actually happening?

Trump has said he plans to debate next week, but is it possible the debate commission won’t let him because of his diagnosis?

nrakich: I don’t see next week’s debate happening as planned. If Trump insists on going, I don’t think Biden will go.

I do think that makes today’s debate more important than a vice-presidential debate usually is (which is not very important).

Also, I think Trump’s diagnosis has highlighted, erm, shall I say, the fragility of both presidential candidates, which might have voters taking a closer look at their No. 2s.

perry: I am really skeptical the debate commission stops the sitting president from debating. The people in charge of these debates didn’t force his staff to wear masks or stop him from interrupting every 10 seconds in the last debate.

sarah: But at the very least, they’ll make him take a COVID-19 test and if it comes back positive … I think they’d have to stop him, or at least that’s what their guidelines seem to suggest.

perry: I don’t think they have the power to make the sitting president take a COVID-19 test and reveal the results. I might be wrong. But this is a really interesting test of power.

And I think Trump will not back down.

meredithconroy: I don’t want to speculate, but depending on Trump’s health, he may hope they do cancel the debate. We’ll just have to wait and see.

But another reason this debate might be more important than a typical VP debate is simply that more people are paying attention right now, right?

sarah: Or more seriously considering who is in the No. 2 role?

nrakich: Not sure about that, Meredith. The TV ratings for the first debate were down from 2016, just like they were for the conventions. (Insert obligatory caveat about how TV ratings are falling across the board and it’s possible people just switched from watching the debate on TV to streaming it online.)

perry: So focusing on this debate, I actually think this debate matters electorally. Some of these polls have Trump in the low 40s, down by double digits. I assume that means some GOP-leaning voters are undecided right now. So if Pence kind of reminds those people that they really hate the Democrats, even if they aren’t that into Trump, that is helpful for the GOP side.

meredithconroy: Yeah, I think that’s a possibility, Perry. I think a lot of people — maybe more moderate people or the less politically engaged — came away from that first debate saying “Wow that was chaos, and American politics is a mess,” but not necessarily attributing the chaos to the instigator (Trump). If Pence can assuage those feelings, I think people on the fence might, for now, stay on the fence instead of deciding to stay home or vote for Biden.

sarah: Trump’s approval rating has slowly been ticking back up, too, even though his standing in the national polls hasn’t improved …

How do you take into account Trump’s approval rating when thinking about his standing in the horse race? Is this some of the upside Pence could possibly tap into tonight?

nrakich: We at FiveThirtyEight are skeptical about weighting polls by partisanship, but it’s at least possible there’s a touch of nonresponse bias (i.e., demoralized Republicans don’t want to take polls right now) in the polls immediately following the first debate.

Do you hear that sound? It’s the partisan non-response alarm going off https://t.co/0ENKBW2kov

— G. Elliott Morris (@gelliottmorris) October 6, 2020

So a more, er, conventional performance by Pence could correct that.

But I wouldn’t read too much into Trump’s approval rating. We’re less than a month until the election; head-to-head polls have fully come into their predictive power. Plus, it’s not like Trump’s approval rating has improved to 50 percent or even 45 percent. It’s at 43 percent — right around where it’s been for most of his term.

sarah: OK, to wrap. Tonight we see the other half of the ticket. What case does Harris need to make for Biden-Harris? And what case does Pence need to make for Trump-Pence?

perry: Biden is winning. Harris’s job is to do no harm. To me, Pence can’t fully explain away Trump’s handling of COVID-19. So he needs to hammer other issues (the police, the Supreme Court, taxes) where Republicans are stronger.

nrakich: I don’t think voters decide who to vote for based on the bottom half of the ticket. So I think Pence and Harris need to successfully argue that their running mates are the best choice for the country.

But voters already know Trump and Biden so well — very, very few have no opinion of them in polls — that I’m not sure the candidates can say anything to change their minds. Honestly, maybe what Pence needs to do is create some highly newsworthy moment that distracts from what is frankly a terrible news cycle right now for Trump.

meredithconroy: Ha! Interesting theory, Nathaniel. But has Pence ever driven the news cycle?

I anticipate that Pence will use the debate to tie Harris to the “far/radical left,” like Trump attempted to do to Biden in the debate last week. And I am going to risk being very wrong and speculate that Pence also doubles down on Trump’s recent messages around the coronavirus and tries to play down its seriousness.

nrakich: “But has Pence ever driven the news cycle?” –> No.

And that’s the ballgame.

#IFTTT #Politics – FiveThirtyEight #politics #538 #A FiveThirtyEight Chat

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gosatsuvns · 6 years

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Weekly Update #176 - A Look Back At 2017 & A Look Ahead At 2018

Tomorrow's the last day of 2017. With that in mind I have decided that, rather than postpone it until the 1st or even wait until next Saturday, I will use today's blog post to take a look back at 2017 and give you an idea as to what you can expect from us in 2018.

So, without further ado, let's see what we have managed to accomplish throughout this past year!

Unfortunately, this year, we don't have anything as big as the release of SHINRAI - Broken Beyond Despair to look back on. Nevertheless, there are a number of things I'm rather proud of.

At the beginning of the year, I was mostly working on SHINRAI's sequel, Withering Without Hope, updating the sprites for recurring characters like Raiko, Nobara and Henjin, for example. I generally worked on a lot of basic things in order to lay the foundation for our next game. Like the story and setting, planning the layout of the new location and starting to work on its design. If you have read one of our more recent blog posts, you might already know that the events of WWH will take place at the Ginmaku Movie Theater. I'm planning to finish the first background of the game as soon as possible so that you can have an actual first look at it.

Over the past 1 1/2 months, I've gotten back into WWH again and I'm planning to continue working on it over the next few months as well... as opposed to pushing it aside almost completely like I did around April.

Why did I do that, you might wonder... Well, that's because I wanted to focus solely on GENBA no Kizuna, the other project we are currently working on and which we officially revealed in June along with its main cast.

Up until that point, I had referred to it as our "dinosaur project" and by now, you should know why that is (at least if you've kept up with our blog posts over the last six months).

GENBA takes place at the Kaseki Residence, home of a world-renowned paleontologist. As such, it features a dinosaur-themed interior, but this "dinosaur theme" is also seeping into character designs and other things, similar to how "Halloween" was the theme for BBD.

GENBA is going to be shorter, a bit more fast-paced and more gameplay-oriented than SHINRAI, featuring a lot more interactivity. With the police actively involved in the investigation, the story being told mostly through dialogue, as well as the ability to experience it through the eyes of multiple characters, it will certainly feel rather different from our previous VN.

Nevertheless, it is still a murder mystery and it does actually connect to SHINRAI in very important ways. A topic I've talked about not too long ago.

With our focus mainly lying on GENBA for most of the year, we naturally made quite some progress with it. By creating a whole bunch of assets ranging from backgrounds to sprites and even menus, the game's foundation is laid now as well, to the point that we're getting really close to the release of a first demo!

That's really what most of our energy went into this year. We did pull off a few other things too, though.

For instance, after all this time, we now have our own website, which we launched back in June along with the GENBA announcement. It still requires more work and I really want to finally expand the sections for GENBA and WWH as well as add some other things to it, but that will be one of my goals for early 2018.

Outside of that (after an eternal back and forth), we have also decided to launch a Patreon page, which we did back in September. Through this, we hope to get enough funds together to eventually hire more people for our tiny team. At the moment, however, it's main purpose is to help us with covering the costs of GENBA's soundtrack.

Now, you might wonder, what exactly you'll get in return for supporting us on Patreon. Well, here's a quick list of everything you currently get access to:

- 3 character design sketches for the suspects appearing in GENBA - design sketches for Kenji and Misaki, 2 of the new characters in WWH - 3 full-length BGM tracks for GENBA - a look at the full script of GENBA's prologue - the first part of WWH's prologue - a post featuring unused BBD art + talk about visual clues - higher resolution & alternate versions of seasonal artworks + a whole bunch of WIP-looks

Things patrons can look forward to in the coming weeks: the final suspect character for GENBA, WWH's first BGM track, the second part of its script and more character designs. You'll also be able to decide through a poll who will be featured in February's Valentine's artwork. And, last but not least, early access to our GENBA demo!

Patreon is really about getting to see things way ahead of everyone else and being able to influence the stuff we do by offering suggestions. Patrons will be able to help us prepare the demo for its public release, for example.

Another thing I want to use Patreon for, however, is to post more WIP-stuff and other things I've always been way too shy and embarrassed about to share publicly. One big other thing patrons can look forward to, for example, is a post about our very first VN project which never got released. I will talk a bit more about how we got started and share with you some very old assets to give you an actual look at our early work from way back in 2011.

So yeah, if you're curious about those kinds of things, please consider checking out our Patreon page. Your support would be greatly appreciated!

I'd actually like to take this opportunity to once again thank everyone who has supported us thus far, whether it'd be through Patreon or any other means.

Throughout this year, we had some incredible things happen. From something as simple as getting new reviews on Steam to even receiving fan mail, both digitally as well as physically. It still feels strange and very surreal to think that some people actually enjoyed SHINRAI that much. People have even asked about possible merchandise, which is kind of shocking to me. But I guess that will be something to look into in 2018.

One of the greatest compliments I have received this year, however, is that SHINRAI actually inspired others to go forth and make their own stories. That's quite touching to hear and... I dunno... like I said, it's surreal. Sometimes it's really difficult to believe that this isn't just a dream. Because these are the kinds of things I have dreamed about for the longest time. For a big chunk of my life, actually.

Really, I'm deeply grateful for all the support we have gotten. People going out of their way to leave us a good review or even send us a message simply to show their appreciation... things like that truly make me happy and I couldn't ask for more. And they certainly serve to fuel our passion. I hope that all of you will continue to stick with us until our next projects come out, no matter how long it will take!

Which I guess brings me to the final point: what's in store for 2018?

Well, like I said before, our main focus will lie on finishing that GENBA demo. It was already supposed to be released in late November, which didn't quite work out. And although not much is missing anymore, we didn't make too much progress on it in December. Which is mostly due to the fact that December is always a really busy month. Aside of a lot of RL stuff, we had to take care of the seasonal artworks and... I admittedly decided to rather devote myself to WWH, simply because I was in the right mood for it. And while I plan to continue work on WWH, I will definitely get back to that demo now, too.

When will GENBA be finished in its entirety? That's a good question. To be honest, I was hoping to release it in 2018, but it's always difficult to assess whether or not that will work out. I can't foresee what kind of hurdles we might stumble into or how long exactly certain tasks might take. That said, I still want to make it my goal to finish GENBA in 2018.

Please keep in mind though that whenever I set goals such as this (even the demo release for late November), it's more of a way to motivate myself rather than me making an actual promise. Might sound like a lame excuse, but... I know that, even if I don't manage to make the deadline, I will still do my best to actually meet it, resulting in more progress than I would achieve otherwise.

If I tell myself that releasing GENBA in 2018 is impossible, so I'll just say 2019... I will make a lot less progress on it, because I'll have that "there's still time"-feeling in the back of my mind. That's why I think it's always important to set personal goals and work towards them as hard as you can. Whether or not you actually manage to reach those goals doesn't really matter as much as the amount of progress you have made once their deadline hits.

Of course, those goals should still be somewhat realistic, so that you can actually feel as though they're perfectly possible to reach. There is no point in purposely setting completely unrealistic goals. That might actually be more detrimental to your work ethic than anything else. But finishing GENBA in 2018 seems doable to me, so I do want to work towards that. Just don't be mad at me please if it doesn't work out after all, haha.

Anyway, this is starting to get a tad too long, so I should finally wrap this up. I will talk more specifically about our January goals in next week's blog post. Until then, please take care and have a happy new year!

And once again, from both Natsu and myself: thank you so much for your interest in the things we do!

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ihealthlove1-blog · 5 years

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The Science-Backed Benefits of Becoming a Cat Lover

Research suggests that cats can make our lives happier and healthier.

She started the afternoon like she does any other: by climbing my torso and pawing at my shoulder, demanding attention. I likely sleepily raised the quilt up and she snuggled underneath at my side. For she– and for me — every day is International Cat Day.

Cats can wake up us at 4a. M. and barf at an alarming frequency, nonetheless anywhere between 10 to 30 percent of us call “cat people” — not dog people, not equal-opportunity cat and pet fans. Therefore why can we decide to attract those fluffballs in our homes and spend more than 1000 each year on a person who isn’t genetically related to people and frankly seems ungrateful the majority of the time?

The clear solution is obvious to me and her to all cat lovers around, who want no scientific research to justify their fierce love. But scientists have studied it anyway and found that, while our feline friends might well not be good for our furniture, they may possibly make some donation to our own physical and emotional wellness.

1. Well Being

According to one analysis, cat owners have better emotional health than people without pets. On surveys, they claim to feel happier, more confident, and not as nervous, and also to sleep soundly, focus and face issues within their lives better.

Embracing a cat could possibly be helpful for your kids, too: In a poll of more than 2,200 young events ages 11–15, kids who’d had a powerful bond with their kitties had a much greater quality of life. The longer attached they were, the longer they believed fit, energetic, and careful and not as sad and lonely; and also the longer they enjoyed their time alone, at leisure, and also at school.

Together with their gravity-defying antics and yoga-like sleeping bearings, cats can also cajole us out of our bad moods. In one study, people with cats reported experiencing fewer unwanted feelings and emotions of seclusion compared to people without cats. In fact, singles with cats were in a terrible mood less often than those who have a cat and a partner. (Your cat is never late for lunch, after all.)

Even Web cats may cause us to smile. People who see cat videos on the web say they feel less negative emotion then (less anxiety, annoyance, and sadness) and more favorable feelings (more trust, happiness, and bliss ). Admittedly, because the investigators found, this joy becomes a guilty one if we do this to the intended purpose of procrastination.

However, seeing cats frighten their humans or get gift wrapped for Christmas will seem to help individuals feel less depleted and regain our energy for your afternoon ahead.

2. Stress

I can attest a warm cat on your lap, giving your thighs a fantastic kneading, is among the greatest kinds of stress relief. 1 day, feeling overwhelmed, so ” I said, “I wish she would take a seat on my lap.”

In one study, researchers detected 120 married people within their domiciles to observe how they would respond to stress–and if cats were any assistance. Hooked up to heartbeat and blood pressure monitors, individuals were put through a gauntlet of chilling actions: subtracting three repeatedly from the four-digit number, and then holding their hands in ice-cold (below 40 degrees Fahrenheit) for two moments. People either sat into a room alone, together with their furry friend drifting around, with their spouse (who could offer moral support), or perhaps both.

Prior to the trying tasks began, the cat owners needed a lower resting heart rate and blood pressure than those who didn’t own any pets. And throughout the activities, the kitty owners tended better: They were more likely to feel more contested than jeopardized, their heart rate and blood pressure were significantly lower, plus so they made fewer math errors. Outside of all the numerous scenarios, cat owners looked calm and made the most bizarre errors when their feline was present. Generally speaking, cat owners additionally recovered faster physiologically.

are cats really calming? Cats won’t judge us for our inadequate math skills or be overly stressed whenever we’re upset –that is why cats are an even far more calming influence than others in some cases.

Cats are not only little beings that are determined by us. We also receive comfort from these –there’s an entire scientific scale that measures how much emotional support you will get from the cat, based on how likely you should get them out in numerous stressful scenarios. Cats offer a steady presence, unburdened by the cares of the world, which can make all our little anxieties and worries seem superfluous.

3. Relationships

Cats are extraterrestrial beings we care for and who care for all of us (or at least we believe they perform ). And people who spend money on this cross-species bonding can see benefits in their human-to-human connections, too.

For instance, studies have found that cat owners are more socially sensitive, trust others more, as well as other people more than people who do not own pets. In case you call your self a kitty person, you’ll have a tendency to think other people as you more when compared with someone who’s a cat or dog person. Meanwhile, even those who watch cat videos are far more supported by others compared to those who aren’t such huge fans of real-time social websites.

While those correlations might appear puzzling, it is sensible for those who consider cats just one node in your social media.

When somebody –animal or human –makes us feel good and attached, it builds up our capacity for kindness and kindness toward the others. As that study of Scottish adolescents found, children who speak well with a very best friend are attached to their cats, probably since they spend some time playing as a trio. “A pet can be demanding, publicly affectionate, consistent, loyal, and honest, traits that could fulfill a person’s basic requirement to feel a sense of self-worth and adored .”

4. Health

Finally, despite everything you may possibly have discovered about kitty-to-human brain parasites, there is a smattering of signs that cats might possibly be useful for our health.

In 1 study, researchers tracked 4,435 people for 1–3 years ago People who had owned cats in the past were less likely to die from a heart attack during this point than those who had never possessed cats–even when accounting for other risk factors such as blood pressure, cholesterol, smoking, and body mass index.

It is true of people even if they did not possess cats now, the investigators explain, which suggests that cats tend to be far more like preventive medicine than treatment to an ongoing disease.

In a second study, of the this University followed two dozen those who had simply obtained a kitty. They completed surveys over a single day or two of bringing their kitty home after which a couple times over the subsequent 10 months. At the one-month mark, people had reduced health conditions such as headaches,

back pain, and colds–even though (typically ) those benefits seemed to vanish as time moved on. As Serpell speculates, it’s possible that those who form a fantastic partnership with their cat continue to find benefits, and those who don’t, well, do not.

Much of the research on cats is correlational, which means we have no idea if cats ‘ are in fact beneficial or if cat people are just already a joyful and well-adjusted group. But unfortunately for all of us cat lovers, the latter does not seem to be the case. Compared to dog fans, at least, we tend to be much more open to new experiences (even if our skittish cats aren’t). But we’re also less extroverted, less friendly and warm, and much more exhausted. We experience more negative opinions and curb them a technique which makes us happy and less pleased with our lives.

On the bright side, that means it’s much more likely that cats do attract us the maximum amount of delight and joy because we assert they do, even though the investigation is far from conclusive. In reality, the huge majority of pet search focuses on dogs, partly because they’re easier to teach as therapy assistants. Still another bone to pick with all our canine counterparts.

While we’re waiting for more data, I’ll carry on to gush to everyone I meet about how happy I am to own a kitty in my own life –and in my bed, in my dining table, also seeing me move to the restroom. What I lose in sleep I compensate for in soft, furry love.

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summerscramble-event · 7 years

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❝ Can you believe that skyline -- ? Ah, well, perhaps you all can’t, you haven’t seen it yet ! Believe me when I say its beautiful, and I’m a man who knows beauty !

❝ I know, I know, ‘ Laslow don’t be wasting time ’, but I assure you, you’ll LOVE what I have to say this time ! I have excellent news regarding our schedule of events ! Er, that being we have one. Tentative as it may be, myself and Robin squared ( talk about weird ?? ) have agreed that this will give you all the basics of the week’s layout, so you all can plan ahead ! Considerate, right ? I know, you can thank me later for being so thoughtful. ❞

JUNE 25 – SUNDAY KICKOFF.

SNO CONE SOCIAL.

Cabana check-in, but save the unpacking for later ! Complimentary sno cones are served all day long as we, the mods, spend today welcoming guests to the luxury Hotrealms resort! Grab a sno cone from the cabana bar because today is the day to get to know your fellow resort comrades! Walk around the resort and view the boardwalk, and as always, I am ALWAYS available for any lonely adventurers. Take a stroll on the beach and wade in the water, go for a swim if you’d like ! This is just a day to get a feel for your surroundings and explore everything the resort has to offer ! Kick back, relax, and socialize ! . . . or don’t, if that’s what you prefer.

JUNE 26 – SWIMSUIT SHOWCASE

Did someone say ladies in bikinis – AHEM – er, swimsuits all around ? Surely you’ve already procured a swimsuit, why not show it off ? We are now taking reservations to walk the stage for this Summer Scramble’s Swimsuit Showcase ! Handmade or commissioned, if you’re interested in the opportunity to earn bragging rights about being on stage, then this is for you ! Come in your bikini best -- or, your best in general I suppose, whatever your preference, we have room for you on the catwalk !

Also, Robin and Reflet have given me word of a sandcastle contest ! I personally will offer you bonus points if you manage to build your sandcastle on someone. I would assume they will have more information on this later !

***STARTING MONDAY, JUNE 26, SENDING ☼ WILL EARN YOU A TURN AT THE MONOMONO MACHINE FOR A PIXELATED PRIZE! THIS WILL CONTINUE ALL WEEK. YOU MAY SEND ONE ONCE A DAY. MODS WILL BE WORKING ACTIVELY TO MAKE SURE ALL ARE ANSWERED DAILY, BUT PLEASE BE PATIENT.

JUNE 27 – BOARDWALK BUZZ

The boardwalk is NOW OFFICIALLY OPEN. All shoppes have been open for a while now, we realize, but now there’s more to do ! Vendors have all moved in and – is that lemon cake ?? Anyway, there’s going to be a whole big stretch of gift booths, and leis are available for purchase ! You may see some familiar faces running booths of their own, so be sure to give them your support and stop in ! Avoiding having to walk all the way into town for something small for your love interest has never been easier! Well, except if they need a new shirt, or a sunhat, but you get the point. Also, along with the boardwalk vendors, we’re excited to announce the dunk tank among many other activities! Yours truly will take the first seat ( more like forced into it ) and the other two will follow suit. No ticket necessary, just jump in line until time limits are cut short, as will the lines. But this is your chance to show no mercy, and get your game face on for Wednesday ! And have I mentioned the sunset from the view of the boardwalk ? Not even a beautiful girl could distract me – er, alright, alright, maybe she would a little.

And I’ve also heard word of a . . . crushing watermelons contest . . . ? What in the Gods’ name . . I suppose some of these people can crush watermelons with their bare hands. Perhaps that’s something someone can enlighten me on later.

JUNE 28 – VOLLEYBALL AND BEACH WRESTLING

Is your team ready to take the trophy home ? Is your body beach ready ? Wednesday is being spent on beach front territory ! The volleyball nets are going up, the referees are ready to call the shots. Gather up your teams and play to win ( you’re joining TEAM LASLOW, right ~ ?) . Trash talk is always fun, but don’t get out of hand, now ! Nobody likes a sore loser, especially when you already know you’re going to lose ~. Compete to defeat, my friends, lay on that sunscreen thicker than faceless skin !

For those uninterested in volleyball but still wishing to compete and hone their skills: maybe beach wrestling is good for you ! Go up against other strongmen, or women, in a test of physical strength. Nobody likes a face full of sand so come prepared to knock your opponent to the ground. Try to keep rough physical harm such as actually making someone bleed all over the sand to a minimum . . we’re really trying not to have any casualties . . please don’t turn this into a death match. I’m begging, I’m not a very good nurse.

Not the sporty type ? Grab some goodies and flags to wave from the boardwalk and cheer on your favorites to victory! They’ll love hearing your harmonious cries ~, even when you’re cheering for me.

***Volleyball teams ARE ENCOURAGED. There has been talk on the dash about potential teams and this is to organize all of those. Matches will be generated ala ‘ hunger games simulator ’ style. We will be posting a call for captains very soon, are we’re looking for 4-8 teams to compete gauntlet-style. If you are interested in forming a team of 10-12 players, be on the lookout. Ground rules and more description on this to come ! All ‘ teams ’ will get a special treat!

JUNE 29 – WATER GUNS, PAINT BALLOONS, AND HAVOC OH MY

Seems like Anna has some new ‘ weapons ’ to share with us ! Only these come in the form of pelting your enemies without mercy! I daresay no one is safe from the attacks of those who even they think they can trust. All of you sitting ducks in the umbrella lounge had better watch out! Oh, it would proooooobably be wise of you to not wear your Thursday best for this, ladies and gentleman, it’s about to get messy ! Water guns and paint balloons will be available at checkpoints for pickup, only one weapon per person but balloons are unlimited ! Let’s see who can avoid getting hit ! No holds barred and no one’s off limits – w-well except for me of course ! You wouldn’t hit your humble host now would you !?

JUNE 30 – BONFIRE/MOVIE NIGHT

Spend your day how you like, my friends, but you have to join us for the bonfire ! Anna has told us she’s providing the makings for uh, s’mores I believe ? Chocolate and marshmallows on graham crackers ? Sounds good to me ! I’m certain a few candy-loving souls will melt at the taste of one! Also, yours truly will have an extra little treat in store for you ! In addition to this, once nightfall is upon us, we can partake in SCARY STORIES. Bring your most terrifying stale to hold the attention of your comrades and really scare us ! Make us so paranoid to walk back to our cabanas without holding someone’s arm afterwards ! Top three scariest stories get prizes ~ Good enough to give it a go, right !? C’mon, don’t be so afraid to give us a fright !

*Scary stories can be SUBMITTED to the EVENT PAGE INBOX. These will be compiled into a compilation post for other followers to READ and VOTE on which one they think is best! NAMES WILL NOT BE ATTACHED to give fair chances and rule out ‘popularity’ votes. DEADLINES FOR SCARY STORIES ARE BEFORE THE 30TH !!

** Scary stories MUST be original. Any submitted may be subjected to be cross referenced for copy/paste. Obviously be as creative as you want, and as in character as you can be with this! Names/URLs will not be posted with them to again, avoid popularity vote, so being ‘ in character ’ is encouraged !

*IN ADDITION, we will be planning a movie night rabb.it stream ! A poll will be going up to vote on a movie to be shown FRIDAY NIGHT. Time is still TBA once we are able to figure out an ideal timeframe. So pop some popcorn and join us !

JULY 1 – FINALE FIREWORKS SHOW

Ah, the end of a vacation can be so bittersweet. The final day is always the hardest, is it not ? Having to pack up all of your things and shamefully realizing you’ve bought too many souvenirs . . wait, that isn’t just me right ? Fear not, my friends, this wonderful week shan’t end with an upset, but with a bang ! Preoccupy your day with whatever you would like but join us Saturday night for FIREWORKS ! Anna is helping me put together a great lineup of a lightshow for you all ! We’re hoping you’ll enjoy it and that will wrap up a breathtaking and relaxing week up nicely with a bow as we all return home !

❝ And I, your humble host, will be most everywhere during this week. If we bump into one another, do join me for a smoothie, eh ? ❞

❝ This is all for now, but if YOU have any suggestions, don’t be afraid to approach me or either of the other two, or drop something into our suggestions box. And if you would rather run something on your own, OUR VENDOR APPLICATIONS are still open ! I would love to see more of my wonderful comrades selling their wares or contributing to this in any way they can ! It’s been lovely to see the excitement already ! We’ll see you soon ! ❞

** Many of the main events will have their own ask meme to coincide with it ! Activities and other roleplayer’s booth events are taking place everyday, but of course, people are busy and threads and ask prompts can be continued on other days, and even past the event week ! We are actively working to make this schedule work and be fun for everyone ! We hope you’re as excited as we are !

#mod lasnigo ;#sea sky and sun ;; summer scramble #tentative schedule of events as we see them!#we're so excited to present this to you guys!!

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doctrinendonuts-blog · 7 years

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Yes, Pennsylvania. You are a bigot.

Yes, Pennsylvania: you are a bigot. Dear Progressives: I understand that you’re in shock, because I am too. My Nasty Women Vote sticker is stuffed in my desk; I can’t bring myself to let it go even though I know that Nasty Women are outnumbered. As an American, I want to learn my lesson, so I can stop the internal and national bleeding. As a teacher, I know the difference between learning and making an unsupported argument (note to students—your final exams will reflect this). It feels like progressives are doing the latter. I’m hearing: Democrats focused too much on people of color and LGBT people (who apparently don’t work?) and not enough on the “working class.” “Working-class” anger, not racism and sexism, explains Trump’s win. The Democratic Party should simultaneously tack to the Left and stop focusing on progressive values such as reproductive choice and racial justice. “Identity politics” is dead, except if your identity is white, male, resident of a former manufacturing region. If you’re in mourning for America’s Unclean Coal, the Democratic Party should listen. If you’re concerned about your mom being deported, about becoming a mother against your will, or about being arrested for using a bathroom, then please take a seat. Your needs lost us one too many elections already. Yeah, no. First, can we please stop saying Trump won because steel and coal lost? The death of steel and coal predates NAFTA, according to economists, historians, and Billy Joel’s classic 1982 classic “Allentown.” Second, Trump voters weren’t poor and many voted against their economic interests. Knowing this, we have two choices: we can assume they’re stupid, or you can believe something other than steel motivated them. The road to 11/8/16 isn’t lined with shuttered steel mills, but with closed minds. The sooner progressives get used to saying this out loud, the better. Remember when we elected our first black president and many voters lost their collective minds? Trumpism in the form of birtherism was born of an explosive, racist rage among people who saw Michelle Obama as an ape and Trayvon Martin as a thug. Meanwhile—and this hurts, because we love our President– the Obama Administration allowed Republicans to falsely paint him as a divisive, my-way-or-the-highway partisan even when his compromises were enraging liberals. The stimulus bill was almost 1/3 tax cuts the GOP wanted. Had the White House crowed about this compromise, they could have painted the GOP into a corner and killed their message he was a divisive partisan before it could take root. Instead, like Lucy with the football, the GOP got everything they wanted, rejected the bill on party-line vote in the House (three GOP senators voted for it), and won the message battle. Lucy got the football back with health care. Instead of a single-payer system, we got a compromise bill based on a Heritage Foundation model. Again, the Administration failed to convey that this was a compromise bill or sell its own policy to the people who would benefit—the same Trump voters who are about to lose their health care. This enabled the 2010 electoral “shellacking” for which our President graciously accepted some responsibility, though the Democratic voters who stayed home bear just as much. Obamacare and infrastructure investments benefited the very people whom the pundits now claim the Dems forgot in our misguided insistence on insisting transgender people are human beings. The truth is, Obama did good things for working-class people, including millions of Trump voters who rely on Medicaid expansion and health care exchanges. But white America didn’t believe it, for some reason. When the incumbent president’s signature accomplishment is unpopular, you’re going to pay for it at the polls, and Hillary Clinton probably did. In spite of Obama Derangement Syndrome, Secretary Clinton left office with a 64% approval rating— 14 points higher than the President’s. The GOP resumes its war on Clinton, spending millions of tax dollars to wound her. They find no wrongdoing. Nonetheless, by the time Senator Sanders the presidential race on April 30, 2015, Clinton’s approval is down to about 46%. And that’s when it got really ugly. Any progressive who tangled with the Bernie Bros (and then got called a c--- for using the term Bernie Bros, and then got called a c--- again for calling out sexism) can tell you—that primary damaged her. Do you remember? Sanders, not Trump, introduced the rigged system into the election cycle. Sanders painted Clinton as an establishment hack owned by Goldman Sachs and unaccountable to real people. “Weak” candidate Clinton wins the primary anyway, and not because it was rigged. Sanders refuses to acknowledge the math and then claims that superdelegates he’d previously railed against as part of the rigged system should actually rig the system for him precisely because he was successful in weakening her. By the time AP declared Clinton the presumptive nominee on June 6, she was 17 points underwater. Although it’s true the email investigation remained active during this time, her decline among Democrats points to something else going on. Her trend line and Sanders’ go in opposite directions. Meanwhile, the GOP nominates a candidate who on a wave of racism, harnessing the rage of voters who have been seething since a black president was elected. America clutches its collective pearls. Nate Silver says oopsie but doesn’t mention racism because why mention racism? Thanks to pressure from Sanders and his energized base, the Democratic Party assembles its most progressive platform ever. But like Lucy with the football, his revolutionaries still don’t want to play for their own team. Sanders doesn’t do much to change that. After promising to rally his troops around Clinton and stop the bleeding from the primaries, Sanders retreats to Vermont, where he buys a third home, and tweets about billionaires while his disappointed supporters fall for former Lexington Town Meeting Representative Jill Stein, who claims that Clinton is more dangerous than Trump. Then Russia joins the Trump campaign and the FBI helps out (because why should Hillary be able to waltz into the presidency just by beating the GOP and the left wing of her own party?). Our nation holds the first presidential election since a right-wing Supreme Court gutted the Voting rights Act. North Carolina Republicans brag about suppressing black votes, and the results prove they were right to brag. In spite of Russia, the FBI, recalcitrant left wingers, Obama Derangement Syndrome, and the Roberts Court, Clinton still wins close to 3 million more votes than Trump, yet loses the presidency. (Breathe. I’ll wait). It doesn’t take long for the far left to blame Democrats for failing to see the electorate through a class-driven lens. Bernie Sanders takes a dig at Clinton and her supporters, saying “It is not good enough for someone to say I’m a woman, vote for me.” He does not consider that Clinton’s gender caused anyone not to vote for her. In stating that “The working class of this country is being decimated. That’s why Donald Trump won,” he does not account for all of the working class people of color who voted against Trump. Or that the majority of Trump supporters believe President Obama is a Muslim. Our class-first revolutionary says “Identity politics” is a game for middle-aged women. And look where that got us. But funny thing about identity politics is – white people play too, and Trump’s America is proof positive. We have a rash of hate crimes. White nationalists are celebrating with good reason. David Duke has praised Team Trump, including an attorney general designee who once prosecuted voting rights workers (ominously, Trump claims three million “illegals” voted in 2016, foreshadowing federal voter suppression efforts led by AG Sessions). But pay no attention to the chorus of “heil Trumps” behind the screen. With the threat of a Muslim registry, mass deportations, the end of Roe, and renewed assaults on LGBT rights, it’s astonishing—and frankly embarrassing—that so many Democrats believe it’s time to focus on (a) wooing the free college, anti-Establishment (white) youth voters who just weren’t feeling Clinton and (b) charming the working-class whites who were insufficiently alarmed by the "build the wall" and "lock her up" tendencies of Trumpism to reject them. Yes, we need to have a good long talk with those young progressive voters, nine percent of whom voted third party in the face of the Trump threat to progressive priorities. But let’s not apologize for failing to give them the candidate of their dreams. I’m a college teacher, and it’s my job to tell young people when they’re full of shit. Here’s an idea that’s full of shit: it’s a candidate’s job to earn your very special vote, and if she fails to do so, none of the consequences are on you. This idea is the civic equivalent of standing over a drowning person, dangling a life preserver just out of reach, and saying “you didn’t say please.” Saying Hillary Clinton didn’t deserve your vote misses the point. The point is, America deserved better than Trump, and you knew that, and you didn’t step up. Yes, we need to talk to white Trump voters. But let’s not reassure them we don’t think they’re racists just because they voted for a KKK-endorsed candidate who promised to build a wall, register Muslims, and promote stop-and-frisk. To paraphrase Chris Rock, what does a person have to do to earn the term racist—shoot Medgar Evers? The fact is, many voters are racist. Some who acknowledge Trump is racist support him anyway. We’re not going to make this racism go away by pretending white people have a right to be told it doesn’t exist. And so, my dear progressives: I ask you to remember how comfortable we were with saying (accurately) that many Americans rejected President Obama because of racism. Do you? Good. So do I. Now it’s time to acknowledge that Trump benefitted from racism. Now close your eyes and remember how, when only one third of Americans supported marriage equality, we committed to change voters' minds because the long-shot cause of equality was a moral imperative. Do you? Good. So do I. Well, 62.5 million Americans just voted for a KKK-endorsed presidential candidate. We must again commit to change voters' minds, because the long-shot cause of equality is a moral imperative. So say it with me: Yes, Pennsylvania. You are a bigot. Was that so hard?

#racism trump clinton obamacare democrats

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