#Ava is still Bitter about this whole situation

[oppipopi]

Tragedy in AvA 5

I've been in fd sticks for almost 2 years now and how tired I am of seeing a Lord in the role of a villainous villain from time to time for the reason "Well, his name is the Dark Lord, so he's evil and does evil things" You don't think that I'm trying to justify him somehow, no. He's an asshole and it's true. But I just want to say that perhaps the personality of Lord is much deeper and more complex than it may seem at first glance.

In short, post-reflections on the personality of Lord, his conflict with Chosen, as well as their relationship. I don't pretend to any canonicity, it's just my thoughts. Let's go!

To begin with, the stick names have no effect on the personality and character of the characters. This is proved by Vic, who in the first minute of his life swore at the creator and almost "defeated" Alan, as well as Chose, who from the first second of his appearance decided to choose the path of ultra violence and blow everything to hell. I think no one will argue that these are slightly different associations that come to mind when we hear the words Victim and Chosen One. Thus, we conclude that the name of the stick affects only the abilities of the bearer, but not the personality.

let's move on

I often see such an interpretation of the personality of Lord, where he is arrogant, aggressive and does not disdain to assert himself by bullying those who are weaker. (I'll make a reservation right away. This interpretation takes place and I do not forbid anyone to think so, but now about something else)

I don't think Lord has the desire to assert himself at the expense of the weak. He does not have the same bitterness towards the world and unremitted rage that Chosen has (four years in prison is no joke to you, and he was kind of mad from the very beginning, so yes …), which he releases at large. I think Lord has more fear of being rejected and abandoned again (as he was abandoned by Alan during the battle with Chosen), so he arranges the whole debauch more out of the thought that "This is what Chosen likes. This is what unites us"

Have you ever thought about what a really big influence Chosen could have on the Lord, and that most likely Lord in AvA5 is what he is to a greater extent because he got involved with the "bad company" in the person of Chosen?

Just to remind you that they were friends for seven years. SEVEN YEARS, DO YOU UNDERSTAND!!!?? And for at least five years, Chosen was satisfied with his way of thinking in the spirit of "arrange destruction, order sucks" and "there are bastards everywhere, cattle all around, give them heat, arrange a pogrom!"

I'm leading all this to the fact that it was Chosen who dragged Lord into all this. He showed him this world and how to behave in it. He held out his hand to him and offered to destroy Alan's computer to smithereens!

It's hard not to be grateful when someone who is capable of killing you, and was going to do it, suddenly decides to save your life and even offer cooperation. I don't know if Lord agreed out of fear, or for some other reason, but I think at this moment Lord mentally exalted Chosen over himself, put him in priority I mean, Lord is the only character who has been assigned a mission (and not just any, but the destruction of Chosen! I think this also played a role in his attitude to destruction and murder). What is it like to be born and immediately receive an order from above? Do not have your own opinion about the situation, but still faithfully execute orders… Despite the fact that eventually Lord stopped following the decree, I think he is still subconsciously waiting for orders. Only now from Chosen. And when he gets it (it doesn't matter if Chose says it directly, or if Lord himself thinks out what he might like), he does it. I am leading to the fact that Lord has completely lost his moral compass. He has no understanding of what is good and what is bad. On top of everything else, He is also follower! He has his own opinion, but no one has taught him how to use it. He only chooses a leader for himself and takes his words and views at face value. Of course, over time, from an authoritative figure, Chosen becomes a best friend in the eyes of Lord. But he still puts him above himself. He puts Chosen's ideals above his own. (although, I don't think that Lord had any ideals before meeting Chosen)

But Chosen's ideals have changed over time, and he forgot to tell Lord about it… Or is it a little different here?

As I wrote above, Chosen himself changed the personality of Lord, and therefore, we can say that Lord in AvA5 is in many ways similar in character, and even in habits to Chosen from AvA3.

By the way, have you ever noticed how much the Chosen from AvA2-3 and the Chosen from AvA5 actually differ in vibe? In AvA5, Chosen seems to me much more restrained, collected, quiet and thoughtful. And also immensely tired. We know that Chosen has rethought his views, but what prompted him to do it? Previously, he did not care about the screams of others, their fear. What has changed? I think that through destruction, intimidation, violence, Chosen released his endless anger and hatred, which seems to have been with him from the very beginning (maybe all the empty-heads created by Alan have their own conditional collective mind? And that's why Chosen got Vic's experience on some mental level? He doesn't know the situation, he doesn't have Vic's memories. Only a feeling of fear, rage and a desire to escape.) But at some point it just stopped producing results. One day he just froze in the middle of the burning streets and realized that he felt absolutely nothing but emptiness devouring from within. Then Chosen probably wondered for the first time, is this really what he wants? He wanted to be free, but is it freedom? Then Chosen begins to change and withdraw more and more into himself, trying to figure out what he wants. And he understands. He understands that he no longer wants to live like this, that he no longer wants to have anything to do with the person he was before, understands that he wants to be better. He wants to contemplate and create, not destroy. That this is the only way to become truly free.

Chosen becomes disgusted with the person he was in 2011. He hates him. He's disappointed in him.

And he sees this man in Lord too clearly.

The same habits. The same facial expressions. The same mindset.

Lord reminded him too much of the one he hated so much, the one he wanted to forget forever. Renounce. Expunge from life.

Maybe that's why he put off this conversation for so long? Maybe that's why he got so angry when Lord (usually docile) did not listen to him and went against him?

Speaking of Lord. Let's look at the situation from his side. You and your best and only friend have been keeping the entire Internet at bay for several years in a row, living soul to soul and just having fun. But at some point your friend suddenly changes. He no longer laughs with you, does not rejoice at the new trashed site. Does not look in your direction. Your friend no longer likes everything that once united you. All that he himself showed you. It's unclear. It's scary. And you're trying to fix it. To take revenge on the common offender. Increase the scale of destruction (maybe then Chosen will have fun again? Maybe he just needs more entertainment??) But he tell you no again. Without explaining anything. You're angry. Get angry because you don't understand. Get angry because you're scared. And you keep doing the only thing you know best, in the hope that it will fix something…

The main tragedy in AvA 5, as for me, is that Chosen created an enemy for himself. He had won Lord over to his side. Chosen himself raised the Dark Lord as we see him in AvA5 And then he changed. But he couldn't change Lord again, because he couldn't cope with his own hatred.

It's really very sad.

And, by the way, I'm not trying to put all the blame on Chosen. He has come a difficult way. He made himself and it's really cool. In AvA 5, he is in fact only at the beginning of his path of becoming the person he would like to be. So it's not surprising that things didn't go so smoothly. I believe that eventually Chosen will be able to accept his mistakes and take responsibility for them. Then his life will really begin to change for the better

[punksarahreese]

night for rehearsal pls 🥺💗

Night | Rehearsal

Theatre!AU; a look into a normal night in the drama club

Prompt: Night

Word count: 1668

***

“Robin!” her name echoed across the auditorium as a familiar blonde bounced over, damp hair escaping from its haphazardly tied scrunchy. She was still in her swim suit too, the spandex peeking out from her open sweater and tucked into her school sweats. She had obviously been in a hurry to leave, which made sense when Robin looked behind her.

“Hey, Sam,” she nodded at the boy who was trailing after her, looking amusing, “Connor, you’re late.”

“So is Sam,” he furrowed his eyebrows at the teasing remark, “It's not my fault I had to drive down to the pool to pick someone up because she missed the bus.”

“I had practice!” Sam argued as she dropped her gym bag on the stage, it's familiar cross-stitch motifs making Robin smile. She had gotten her best friend a new duffel bag for Christmas that year, since her old one was falling apart from years of damp swimsuits and piles of theatre costumes. She had taken the time to stitch little things into the black fabric, including little bees and flowers that she thought would make Sam smile. It had and it never ceased to make Robin happy too when she saw how practical yet meaningful her gift had turned out to be.

“Still,” Robin nudged Connor’s shoulder, “Now we know why I’m the president of the club and you two aren’t.”

“We are literally co-presidents, Ro,” Connor’s reminder made her laugh; as if he would ever let her forget that. They had helped rebuild the dying drama club in their first year of high school, bringing in more students and assisting their teacher with planning and fundraisers. Sam joined along the way, quickly becoming their friend with her headstrong disposition and bold ideas. It had always been the three of them, for years, and now that they were in senior year everything had started to feel a bit bittersweet.

Robin tried to not let it get to her, though, because graduation wouldn’t tear them apart. Her and Connor had the same dream, Broadway, and they had made a pact years ago to hold each other to it. Every audition, every show, and even every mess up and meltdown was done with the other there to support and help. Even when things got hard they were in it together, no way would one bad audition or anything ruin their chances at the best schools or roles.

Sam was there for fun, mostly. She was a good actress, easily immersed into any role she was given and ready to take the lead in activities. She was an athlete first and foremost, though, and that hadn’t changed much. She had her dreams set on olympic coaching since the beginning, yet joined the drama club because their counselor thought it would help her with team building. It did, for sure, and while Sam never changed her mind on her dream profession, she had made a lot of friends and found a certain love for musicals along the way.

“What’s the plan for tonight?” Sam asked once they all settled down a little, taking a seat beside her on the stage. Robin glanced at the clock across the room, noting that it was almost half-past six. She had stayed after school to run lines by herself and get a head start on some set design. The second semester had just begun and that meant the spring arts showcase was fast approaching, which meant the drama club was scrambling to start preparations for a show. Auditions had taken place only the week prior, which had Robin practicing painstakingly so she could secure the main role. It was, after all, her last year in the club; she ought to make a lasting impact.

“Rehearsal, on book still,” she replied, fidgeting with the worn corner of her script book. She had a lot of nervous energy fizzling beneath her confident exterior and unfortunately she wasn’t all too good at hiding it. Not from her friends, anyway, because Connor’s hand reached out to cease her worrying of the book’s fragile pages almost as quickly as they started.

“It’s only the second week,” he reminded her, “Of course we’re still on book. We’ll have it memorized soon enough, Robin, be patient.”

“I know.”

“We’re already ahead of schedule with costuming and props,” the blonde across from them added cheerfully, “Plus we can come in during lunch hour and get things done if we really wanted. I’m sure I could rope some of the freshman into helping paint and stuff.”

“And by that you mean bribe the kids into doing the grunt work.”

Faking a gasp, Sam glared at Connor a little, “How dare you accuse me of such manipulation.”

“Dramatic,” he stage-whispered to Robin, who was shaking her head at the whole thing. The two never stopped bickering but it was how they showed affection, even if they did butt heads sometimes. Between the three of them there was a lot of attitude and maybe a little too much ego in the room, if Robin was to be honest, so this was commonplace. It was all in good fun, though, and they had never actually had a proper falling out despite the lighthearted arguing.

“That’s kind of the point, Rhodes.”

Before any more non-club related dramatics could be had, their teacher walked into the auditorium. Tanya Hanes was a rather eccentric woman, with a never ending supply of anecdotes and interesting fashion choices, though Robin assumed that kind of came with the job description. What was a little odd, though, was the girl trailing behind Ms. Hanes.

She was only vaguely familiar to Robin, probably from one of her AP classes if she had to guess. The girl had her dark blonde hair in a meticulous half ponytail, leaving her sharp features unshadowed. She didn’t make eye contact with anyone, instead looking around the auditorium as if she was searching for anything to keep her occupied. Her beat-up red converse squeaked against the ugly tile floor as she stumbled a little over an extension cord, muttering something as she regained her balance.

“Everyone,” Ms. Hanes’ voice echoed through the large room, bringing everyone’s attention to her down near the front of the stage. She waited a few moments for the younger students to calm down from whatever they were messing with in the props area, waving them over until she deemed it quiet enough to continue.

“We have a new student joining us for this semester,” Ms. Hanes explained as she gestured to the blonde behind her, “She will be here to assist with any technical or set related work, as well as line prompting and costuming.”

There was a chorus of welcomes and hellos, Robin noticing the way the girl relaxed a bit at that. She was glad the drama club were relatively friendly people, since the comforting atmosphere managed to make new kids feel at ease.

“Care to introduce yourself, dear?”

“Uh… yeah. Ava Bekker,” her voice was lower than expected, laced with a pretty accent that seemed to catch everyone’s interest, “Nice to meet you all, I guess.”

“Robin, Connor, since you two are our presidents would you mind helping Ava become acquainted and set up with some jobs?”

“Hey! Don’t forget me,” Sam put on a little pout, obviously in the mood to joke around. She never wanted a leadership position in the club, since she already had that in her sports and didn’t want to take away from her best friends’ thing. Still, she liked to be included, though it was just assumed she would do whatever Robin and Connor did anyway.

“Of course, Samantha,” the teacher laughed, “But don’t terrorize her, now.”

Scrunching her nose at the use of her full name, Sam just nodded, “Wouldn’t dream of it.”

After letting people know they would start practice as soon as their presidents got things sorted, Ms. Hanes went off to talk to some students. Taking that as their cue to go properly greet the new girl, Sam was the first to hop off the stage to meet Ava near the stairs. The blonde looked a little startled at her energy but offered her a polite smile regardless, holding out her hand to shake.

“Call me Sam,” she said happily, “Welcome to Hell.”

“Sammy,” Robin sighed and lightly hit her shoulder as she came up behind her, “Don’t do that.”

“I’m only teasing, Ro,” Sam replied coolly, “Newbie, meet the Queen of Hell herself.”

“Please,” Robin’s incredulous look only made her laugh, which had her best friend sighing yet again. She turned her attention to Ava, relieved to see that the other girl only looked amused at the antics.

“I’m Robin,” she said with a smile she hoped was reassuring, “I promise Sam will calm down once she stops showing off.”

“I don’t mind, at least one of us has the energy,” Ava replied, though her tone was a little guarded. She was nervous, that was obvious, and the other girl just hoped she would become more comfortable once she got acquainted with everyone. She still offered Robin a handshake too, which was an amusingly formal gesture for students around there.

“Well, I can show you backstage and get you set up with a script and some jobs to do, if you’d like.”

“Uh, yeah, sure,” Ava nodded and the smile she gave Robin just about melted her heart. It was the first genuine look the blonde had had since coming into the auditorium and it was sweeter than that ridiculous starbucks drink Connor was always carrying around. She was just as pretty as her smile, that was glaringly obvious, and Robin would be a fool to say otherwise. Not one to be shy very often, she recovered quickly and had no qualms about offering her hand to Ava, a smile of her own settling on her face when the other girl took it cautiously.

“C’mon then, Ava,” Robin replied as she tried to ignore Sam’s pointed look she saw in her peripheral, “I’ll introduce you to some people first.”

[songofsoma]

In Perpetuum et Unum Diem

fandom: the wayhaven chronicles pairing: ava du mortain x cecilia beck rating: mature word count: 4,631 

part 1 / part 2 / part 3 / part 4

read it on ao3

It seemed like her eyes had just closed as sleep overcame her when a servant came bustling into the room.

The noise of the intrusion jolted Cecilia awake, sitting up quickly, as she clutched furs to her body, covering the bareness of her breasts. Ava was still stretched out over the mattress, seemingly unaffected as she watched them both through a frame of thick, blonde lashes.

The servant’s lips parted as if she was going to say something, but the words died in her throat the moment her gaze settled on how the noblewoman was exposed from the waist up. Her attention flitted between the two ladies in bed, a look of horror beginning to seep into her features.

Furrowing her brows, Cecilia yanked the blankets to cover up Ava, the idea of the servant’s ogling of her lover made a fire blaze within her belly.

“Well,” Ava began with a grumble. Irritation finally leaking into every word. “You have woken us both, quite unjustly may I add. What do you want?” The tips of her fingers found the warmth of Cecilia’s lower back. She had to bite back a shiver at the coolness of Ava’s touch.

“M-my apologies, m’lady.” The woman curtsied hurriedly, clearly wanting to escape the current situation. “Lady Nestoria has requested Lady Cecilia’s presence in her parlor.”

Cecilia’s eyes widened as she looked over at Ava. The message seemed to have dragged her from the haze of sleepiness she had previously been prisoner to.

“Tell my mother that we will join her soon,” she said after a moment.

The servant didn’t seem satisfied as she shifted her weight. “Actually, my Lady, she specifically asked for Lady Cecilia’s presence alone.”

A bitter chill infiltrated the air surrounding Ava and the hand that had been caressing her back stiffened. Cecilia swore ice would begin to harden her lashes if she allowed this to continue for much longer.

Squashing down her nerves, Cecilia put on the politest smile she could muster. “Of course. Please tell her how delighted I am for the invitation and that I shall not keep her waiting long.”

The woman curtsied once more, giving the two one last wary glance before scurrying out of the room.

With a heavy sigh, Cecilia dropped the furs back into her lap. The sun peeking through the window began to warm a patch of skin on her shoulder.

“I shall go with you.” It sounded as if Ava’s decision was set in stone.

She shook her head. “No, you will not.”

There was no need to look at her face to know the deep scowl that would have settled on her lips at the disagreement.

“I am not going to throw you to the dogs, Cecilia.” The heavy wood of the bed creaked under Ava’s shifting weight as she sat up.

Cecilia managed a small smile, turning to meet her gaze. “My love, you are not  throwing me to the dogs . There is no need for such dramatics when I am simply sitting down with your mother.”

“You do not understand. She is difficult—”

She raised a hand to silence her. “All noblewomen are. I fear it comes with the title.” Cecilia stretched, noticing with a grin the way her body ached from the night prior. “Besides, I am more than qualified to deal with people like your mother. Some may say it is a gift.” She leaned in closer to Ava, letting her charm settle into every fiber of the woman.

Raising a blonde brow accusingly, she snapped, “A fantastic talent that includes running away?”

Cecilia yanked away from her as if she had been burned. Her whole demeanor changed in an instant and regret flew onto Ava’s face.

“Cecilia, I did not mean—” she reached out to pull the girl back, but Cecilia had already turned away from her, determined to hide how much her words pierced her.

She never had a thick skin when it came to personal jabs. Her mother always blamed it on her tender heart whilst proclaiming that it was going to be her undoing. As much as she tried, she struggled to hide the way she felt about anything really. No matter how hard her tutors tried, they could never seem to beat that flaw out of her.

Her tongue was too honest.  A smack to the back of the head.

Her eyes revealed too much.  A stinging whack from a switch on her palms.

Her face crumpled into one of hurt after a few sharp words.  A hearty pinch on her arm that left a bruise.

So instead, she tried to mask it until she was alone.

Though, she was weak as she bit her lip to hide its trembling.

She sat on the edge of the bed, her back facing Ava, her vision swimming as she stared at the stone making up the wall. “Is it so cowardly to fear death?” She finally asked in a harsh whisper. “For I could not stand before Death and look him in the eye. I should not fear to meet my maker.” Her head hung lowly in defeat, tears running down her cheeks graciously.

Strong hands held her waist as Cecilia was pulled back against Ava’s chest. “You are not a coward, mea vita. I spoke without thinking, I beg you to forgive my carelessness. I do not think you are cowardly, in fact, you are the opposite in every way.”

“I trip over my own heart because I feel too much.” Cecilia rose, shrugging off her touch. “At least that is what my mother would tell me when she was feeling particularly nice.” An unusual bitterness colored the words.

Ava remained silent and she could feel where her eyes were burning a hole in her back.

She took the quiet moment to collect herself, squaring her shoulders, and straightening her spine as she took a deep, shaky breath. “I will meet with Lady Nestoria by myself, end of discussion.” Cecilia wrapped a dressing robe around herself to combat the chill of the air.

“I understand.”

Cecilia quickly glanced over her shoulder at a mournful looking Ava before turning her attention back to selecting a dress. The family had been kind enough to have a few dresses made for her, ones that fit her better than that of those meant for adolescents.

She selected a green one, whose rich velvet reminded her of the color of her lover’s eyes. Even if she was cross with her at that moment, she couldn’t resist the garment that had quickly become her favorite.

She dressed quickly, her hands clumsily doing the ties to make herself presentable.

“I should be going now.” Cecilia’s fingers were busy weaving the length of her dark hair into a loose braid. “I will see you at dinner.”

Ava only nodded, her gaze hardening as Cecilia left her alone in the room.

***

Sitting amongst the riches of the lady of the house’s parlor made her feel like one of the statuettes on display. Only there to be viewed, critiqued, judged. At least, that’s how it felt under the silver gaze of Lady Nestoria du Mortain.

Her features were sharp and pointed, much like Ava’s.

A strong nose and jaw. Grey eyes that seemed to blend in with the whites of her eyes as when a ray of rogue sunlight hit them exactly right. And straight, blonde hair pulled back into a polished updo that must’ve taken her servants all morning, weaving the honeyed braids to allow the crimson headdress to sit securely on the back of her head.

If Cecilia hadn’t known better, she would have gambled on this woman before her being royalty—a queen or its likeness.

“Lady Cecilia,” Nestoria had greeted her coolly upon her entry, “I appreciate you joining me, dear.”

The accent that left her lips was jarring at first listen. It was French. Extremely so, unlike the thickness of the English ones spoken by herself and Ava.

She had squared her shoulders and presented a dazzling smile.

Her mother would’ve been proud. Especially if she could have known fear’s frigid fingers wrapping around her throat as she was met by such eloquence.

“I assure you, my Lady, the pleasure is mine to behold.” Cecilia dropped into a polite curtsy, not failing to notice the pleased look in Nestoria’s eyes.

She rose before taking a seat on the bench she was directed to, hands folding in her lap. “My deepest apologies if I have kept you waiting. I am afraid I had gone down an incorrect corridor and found myself lost. I can only imagine how pitiful of a sight it must have been.” She shook her head, slightly embarrassed at the sudden divulge of information.

“Oh, my dear, there are some days where I still feel like I am wandering around in circles and I have lived here for what feels like an eternity now.”

They shared a light laugh at that. Some tension in Cecilia’s shoulders began to ease, though her nails still dug into the flesh of her palms, leaving indentations of crescent moons behind.

“I am truly mournful however,” Lady Nestoria began once more, her gaze appearing to soften, “that I have not been able to sit down with you individually at an earlier occurrence. I do hope you forgive me for my inhospitality.”

Cecilia’s eyes widened. “My Lady, I am simply thankful for you and my Lord allowing me to stay in your home. I would have felt blessed if you offered me a stable with the horses.”

She seemed to bristle at the very idea. “Heavens! You are far too pretty to be kept in the stables with those beasts! Which is why I do not know why you favor the company of my eldest daughter so often.”

Ah, there was the reason for this meeting.

“My Lady, I happen to revel in the company of your daughter. Ser Ava—”

“She is a  Lady, not a Ser. And I shall expect you to address her as such!”

The sudden fire in her tone made Cecilia begin to curl in on herself to escape the blazing heat of her building fury.

“Of course.” Cecilia’s eyes dropped, not wanting to hold her gaze. “I beg for your forgiveness and assure you that it will not happen again.”

Lady Nestoria took a deep breath, eyes closing as she regained her composure. “Forgive me, Ava’s title is quite a sensitive subject, but it is no fault of yours. It is my brute of a child who is to blame,” she said with a huff.

Cecilia’s stomach churned and she managed a weak nod.

“She is quite fond of you, is she not?” A pale brow arched. She couldn’t figure out if it was a genuine question or if it was meant to be accusatory.

When there was no immediate reply, Nestoria continued. “My youngest, Mazelina, talks nonstop about wanting to steal you away from her sister. That child’s curiosity will get her into trouble one day,” she hummed, thinking aloud.

“I am afraid I have not had the pleasure of meeting your entire family, my Lady. It is—” her unfinished sentence hung on the tip of her tongue, unsure if she should continue. An expectant look from the lady sitting across from her was prompting her to continue. “Truthfully, it is strange. I mean no offense. My father was insistent we all gather for supper. Although my family was much smaller which made it easier, I suppose.”

“My dear girl, you never did say which house you belong to,” she observed.

Cecilia shifted uncomfortably. “House Beck, ma’am.”

Silver eyes narrowed. “I cannot say I have heard the name.”

Relief washed over her as she realized the news of a runaway daughter was not enough for the higher-ranking houses to gossip about.

“It is a minor family. I would have been surprised if you had.” That sweet tone and a polite smile lit up her demeanor once more.

Nestoria gave a long sigh, leaning back against her seat. “How I wish my daughter was more like you, an image of a youthful and well-mannered Lady. I fear there is no hope for Ava, for He seemed to have given me a son instead.” She shook her head, looking mournful. “Perhaps, my other daughters could look to you as a model of what they should strive to become.”

Cecilia was growing uncomfortable with the way the conversation was headed. But there was no room to interject for Nestoria continued.

“Perhaps,” she said slowly, eyes sparkling with an idea. “I shall have you marry one of my sons. Then you shall be my daughter in name! Oh, what a glorious thought that is.” A hint of wistfulness lingered around her.

A streak of chills ran up Cecilia’s spine at the mention of marriage. She stilled herself from physically revolting at the comment.

Miraculously, her voice didn’t shake as she spoke. “With all due respect, my Lady. I do not think that would be wise.”

“Oh?”

“I do not wish to be ensnared in a loveless marriage. I have witnessed the consequences too many times. And I refuse to be used as a ploy for politics.” The words came out harsher than she had intended.

Nestoria seemed rocked by the boldness arming each syllable.

“Every beauty has its imperfection. And yours, Lady Cecilia, is your heart and naivety.” Their eyes never wandered from each other, no matter how intense it grew. Cecilia would not squirm under the challenge.

“You are mistaken, my Lady.” Cecilia’s lip curled venomously as she stood. “My heart is my greatest strength. It is what has kept me going for this long because, my Lady, I bow to no one but my own will.”

Her eyes practically bulged from her head.

“Now, if you will excuse me, I do not want to keep Ser Ava waiting.”

Cecilia gave an exaggerated curtsy before spinning on her heel, a small smirk tainted her lips as the doors slammed behind her.

***

By the time she had found her knight, Cecilia swore the stone beneath her feet was warped from the way she paced. The metal of her boots was scraping across the ground, but she paid little mind to it. Ava’s attention was concentrated elsewhere which meant she hadn’t heard Cecilia’s approach.

The words from this morning appeared in the forefront of her mind. Cecilia hesitated, hovering in the archway.

Sensing eyes on her, Ava’s head whipped towards her.

“Cecilia,” she breathed, the muscles in her neck tensing.

Cecilia raised a brow questioningly. Her feet refused to carry her forward and her lips were defiant as no words poured from them.

“I was…” Ava trailed off, her gaze falling to her hands. Following, she saw the bouquet in the suffocating grasp of the knight’s iron gauntlet. A drawn-out sigh filled the space between them, squeezing her eyes shut. “I am sorry, Cecilia. I did not mean what I said earlier. It was inappropriate whether I believed it or not, and I should have offered you a source of comfort instead of worsening the problem.”

Cecilia’s lips parted as the woman slowly approached her.

She still could not look her in the eye. “It has been on my mind this morning. I did not know how to make it up to you, for words alone are not enough to mend the hurt in your eyes, so I figured I would start by gathering things you enjoy.” Ava pursed her lips, nervously holding out a small bouquet of flowers.

“Oh, Ava,” she murmured, taking them from her gently. A smile pulled at the corners of her mouth as she admired the reds, pinks, and whites contrasted against the vibrant green of their stems and leaves. “It is beautiful.”

Ava's hand reached out, brushing over her cheek. The metal of her gloves was cool against the heat blossoming in her cheeks. “I am incredibly sorry for the way I acted. I will do better by you.”

Leaning into the touch, she tore her gaze away from the flowers to meet the sight of her emerald oasis peering down hopefully at her. “I know, my darling.”

Ava pressed a tender kiss to her forehead and Cecilia’s eyes fluttered shut for a brief moment as they basked in the quietness of the garden’s entryway.

“I was hoping I could steal you away to go riding today.” Ava murmured, thumb caressing her face. “I am feeling quite selfish and want you for myself before another one of my lovely family members can take you away.”

An image of Nestoria du Mortain’s angered glare echoed in her brain. The last thing she wanted to do was have to face another one of her kin.

“I would like that, yes.”

With a gentle smile, Cecilia was offered an iron-clad arm, to which she immediately accepted. She nestled further into Ava’s side, trying to decide whether or not she was frustrated with the suit of armor or more enamored with how she looked in it.

“One horse or two?” Cecilia teased.

Ava almost looked offended at the question, making Cecilia giggle.

The stables were located on the far end of the gardens. Tucked just out of sight behind the walls of shrubbery and foliage so one could gaze out of the window and not have to experience the so-called blemish representing work of common folk.

The dirt floors, damp from the previous night’s rain, muddied her slippers and discarded straw stuck to her feet–but she did not mind. It was the fact that she was here with Ava and the lingering fact that they would be uninterrupted within the cover of the forests.

“Ser Knight, my Lady,” one of the stable hands greeted them casually. They tended to frequent the stables to steal some time to themselves.

Ava nodded in a reply and Cecilia smiled warmly. “Good morning, Manning,” she said sweetly.

His cheeks flushed a rosy pink beneath the smudges of dust.

Ava squeezed her arm tighter and Cecilia suppressed an amused eye roll at the unnecessary envy. It was no use either to tease her about it later on since she would simply wave it off and blame it on the protectiveness of her nature.

“Mister Manning,” she said tightly, removing the bouquet from Cecilia’s gasp to hold them out. “Will you make sure these are sent to my chambers unharmed?”

"Philomena–”

Her nostrils flared as she began to become frustrated. Now Cecilia did roll her eyes at her attitude.

“Son, I assure you I can prepare my own horse. I am not a prissy noblewoman like those other women you attend to,” she snapped.

Cecilia furrowed her brows. She couldn’t dress a horse. When she had rode back home, a sympathetic servant had saddled Lady for her.

Ava met her gaze. “I do not mean you, of course,” she followed up quickly in a panic.

“Mhm.”

The knight growled, turning her attention back to the boy. “Just do as I ask.”

“Yes, ser,” he mumbled and clumsily ran towards the house. A few petals fell to the ground as he went.

Cecilia pulled herself from Ava’s hold to allow her to handle her steed. “You need to work on your manners,” she teased.

The joke either passed right over her head or she was trying to give it right back to her. “Careful, love, or else you may begin to sound like my mother.”

She sighed, turning to admire one of the other horses poking her head out of the stall.

Her nose was soft against her fingertips. Hot breath fanned over her skin as the mare huffed appreciative at the affection. Sable colored fur was broken up by patches of white across her back and forehead.

“A beautiful animal,” she cooed.

The horse whinnied as if agreeing with her.

“Her name is Daphne.”

She turned to look at Ava quizzically.

A short chuckled ensued. “My brother, Oudin, named her after the Greek myth.”

“Oh,” she said shortly, looking back at the mare. “Well, that is a morbid tale.”

“I agree.” Heavy hands held her waist from behind, pressing Cecilia’s back into her gaudy breastplate. “I do not understand men who favor feminine tragedy.” The words lingered in the air as they both stared at Daphne for another few seconds.

Philomena snorted from behind them, growing impatient as he stomped at the ground.

“How incredibly dramatic,” Ava grumbled, stepping away from her lover to finish saddling the horse.

“I suppose he truly does suit you then.” She smirked as she reached out to pet the black stallion. It was a truth and the silence of his owner proved it.

“Do you need assistance, my lady?” Ava changed the subject away from herself as quickly as she could manage.

Cecilia smiled, allowing Ava to hoist her up onto Philomena’s back. Once she was settled, Ava swung up behind her.

Taking advantage of the closeness in proximity and the way they were sitting, Cecilia nestled into Ava’s arms as they reached around her to take hold of the reins.

“Ready?” Ava asked in a murmur, leaning forward to press a kiss to the back of her head.

“Always.”

The afternoon sun warmed the bits of skin exposed from the neckline of her dress. The days were growing warmer as the summer months grew close. It was a time Cecilia always looked forward to.

The sweet air of the forest was filled with the sounds of rustling leaves and chirping birds, accompanied by Cecilia’s soft chatter as she swayed with Philomena’s movements.

Ava listened diligently, wrapped up in every word that fell from the Lady’s lips.

They had spent many afternoons like this, hiding amongst the cover of the woods, Cecilia talking about nothing and everything at the same time. There was a certain spot they travelled to on outings such as this one. A break in the trees just up the path, foliage crowning the banks of a small tarn.

When they arrived, Ava broke away to make sure the stallion was settled, allowing Cecilia a few solitary moments to get away with any sort of mischief she could get into. Usually, this included kicking off her slippers to begin wading into the shallow waters, her feet sinking into the muddy sediment.

Ava clucked her tongue from behind her. “You are going to soil the bottom of your dress, my lady.” Cecilia turned her head to give her a sly smile. “Then I will have to listen to you complain the rest of the way home.”

She rolled her eyes at this, carefully beginning the trek back to solid land and falling into the open arms of her knight.

Hand-in-hand, they began to stroll around the edge of the water, only stopping when Cecilia bent down to pluck a wildflower to tuck it into the folds of her lover’s braid.

“Why did my mother ask to see you today?” Ava finally asked, her face revealing that the subject had been on her mind for quite some time.

She frowned a bit, plucking at the stem of a sweet violet. “For a simple chat.”

The blonde couldn’t contain her hearty scoff. “My mother does not  chat  as you say.”

“Perhaps she just wanted to get to know the stranger wandering the corridors of her home,” she deflected, tossing aside the tattered flower.

“Lady du Mortain only takes interest in things that she can use to her advantage, little bird. Surely, you are not too naïve to see this fact?” The metal tips of her glove brushed a stray hair from Cecilia’s cheek.

Cecilia looked away from her. No answer followed as she replayed the meeting in her mind. Of course, she knew this. Lady Nestoria had made her intentions clear towards the end of their conversation.

“What is it?” Ava pressed, uncomfortable at the silence.

“Forgive my boldness, but you and your mother do not get along, do you?”

Ava chuckled, casting her gaze over the water. “I cannot imagine what gave you that impression. We both are filled with such warmth when the topic comes up.”

When Cecilia did not speak, she continued.

“I am the eldest of seven children. A daughter being their first-born was not ideal for my parents as you can imagine. For we women are weak in both mind and body. At least, that is how the world views us. Take care to notice that I am the antonym of a proper lady, little bird.” Pride swelled her tone as she spoke. Cecilia swore she even flexed absent-mindedly, although it was hard to tell with the bulkiness of her armor. “My parents struggled to have children for many years after my birth, so my father began to raise me as if I were his son. The moment I could take steps on my own, he had a sword in my hand. He taught me everything I know and shaped me to be the warrior I am today. Consequently, this caused a strain with my mother who wanted nothing more than for me to learn how to be prim and proper for a future husband.

“When they had the twins, my brother Oudin and sister Grecia, Mother tried to force me to begin my teachings of how to be a proper lady. Even at the age of five, I would have nothing of it. I favored being out with Papa’s men to watch them train. There was nothing I wanted more than to be a knight, it was what my father had instilled in me, after all.

“I grew older and my parents had more children. Thomas, Dain, Iseult, and finally Mazelina. My mother finally had more daughters to dote on and it seemed like she was going to leave me be. Until the prospect of marriage arose. The moment she brought up the offer of a marriage of some elderly lord from God knows where, I fled to Papa and begged until he swore my future would lead to a path of knighthood. I squired later than most children, but I had been molded by the best.” Green eyes were glazed over as Ava’s mind was in a different place, a soft smile tugging at her lips. She looked so happy at the memories surfacing that it made Cecilia’s heart clench. “I will forever be grateful for my father’s mercy. Otherwise, I would be married off to a lord and a mother by now.” The thought seemed to make her ill.

Cecilia slipped her hands into Ava’s, tugging her towards her. “I am eternally indebted to your father as well, my dear knight.”

She bent down, pressing their foreheads together, the tips of their noses brushing. “Even in another life, I would find my way to you.” Ava murmured, moving to grasp her hips, fingers knotting in the fabric.

“Promise me,” she breathed against her lips. “Swear you will always find your way back to me.”

“I swear on my honor, I would fight through the depths of Hell to reach you, little bird. My place is by your side for my life is entirely yours.”

The way Ava believed every word she uttered made Cecilia’s knees weak.

She closed the gap between them, claiming the kiss that had been hanging before her. Cecilia kissed her with such ferocity, she was sure Ava was going to steal every last breath in her lungs. But if she wished, she could steal it all.

Ava could have every last bit of her if she so chose.

Cecilia was hers.

Her heart.

Her body.

Her soul.

It was all hers.

[oveliagirlhaditright]

Even after years and years of searching, the Guardians of Light never found Sora... Until they fought another Keyblade War against new enemies... and at the end of it, the elusive Master of Masters told Kairi--and Kairi alone--that he was Sora. And Kairi somewhat reluctantly runs away with him, then--battling with what she wants and what she thinks is right. But if she can, perhaps, save Sora through her actions... maybe then it'll be right. Definitely rated T, but should maybe even be M. Read at your own risk. Sora is NOT alright.

Author's Note: This was supposed to be the end to a Master of Masters!Sora fanfic that someone requested of me--that I still need to finish--but it didn't really fit, so I've decided to release it as its own thing. Dark and pretty mature. Just a warning. Though originally, this was going to be a lot darker--or could have been--and I toned it down a lot. Originally, they were going to argue a lot more--which would have led to more angst and sad realizations--and yeah. Broken World "...So," Kairi started as she walked back into the living room, wanting to get the awkwardness out of the way, since it seemed like she and Superbi—Sora—were going to be camping out together in his apartment for a long time... and despite everything that had happened and all he’d done… this was still Sora, who she was highly attracted to, it would seem. "Are we- are we going to have sex? Ugh. I can’t believe I’m even asking this…" And instantly, Superbi- Sora was laughing hysterically from his computer desk. And if Kairi closed her eyes and just listened, she could almost believe it was her old Sora, who had found even the lamest jokes under the sun as funny... even if there was a certain bitterness to his tone now. "What, Kairi? Do you think I'm some helpless virgin? So desperate for his first time, that he'd pressure you into sex, despite all the issues we need to work out first? That would be a 'no'. I... I learned how to control my sexual desires through Ava... Not that I'm boasting about it. She wasn't you, and never could be—and she was- she was far too young to deal with all of the turmoil. I shouldn't have let her love me—but I long ago stopped being good. So, what can I say?" Kairi nodded numbly—not at Sora’s words at no longer being good, or even seeming to care if he was or wasn’t. She didn’t believe that at all. But rather at the knowledge that they could keep their cool with each other here—though there was a ridiculous part of her that thought Sora was now saying he didn’t desire her at all and wanted to cry. But perhaps this pain was just something they both deserved, because of their mistakes. Hadn’t she slept with Riku once, when they’d both been grieving for Sora, even though it had seemed like Naminé and Riku were going to end up together even then? "If… we're confessing past sins here, then I guess I should tell you that I slept with Riku... just once; and I’m sure you can guess why... So, I suppose the dream of the two of us getting our white wedding is over now, huh Sora? As is our former fairytale romance..." Kairi had meant to tuck her feet in as she said this—as she so often did—but that seemed too cute and dainty for the situation they were in now, so instead she just settled on scuffing against one of Sora’s dressers and trying to focus on that. And the Sora of the past wouldn't have agreed with Kairi’s sentiment at all, she knew; he would have been insistent that there was a way to capture the purity and magic they’d just had, even now. But the one here and now, who was pulling up a file that Kairi was certain she didn't want to really know about, could only answer in the affirmative to all that she had said. "Yes. It is. I was- for a hot minute there, I was your enemy. Never forget that, Kairi... And while I want to believe I've seen enough, so that me having to make contingency plans for our future is now over... I've gotten too used to having a million gambits like Xehanort did. I may never be able to stop it… And we may end up crossing Keyblades again... I'm sorry. But even if we do- Know that I'll never hurt you. I could never hurt you. You may kill me, in the end... and maybe you should. But I'll never really harm a hair on your head..." And suddenly, just like that, it was all too much for Kairi. And she couldn’t see anything of Sora here at all anymore, even though there clearly was. There was a green short-sleeve shirt that resembled the one with boxes on it, that had often littered his floor when they were fourteen… there were tons of sea salt ice cream sticks in the trash can… and Kairi could even see a picture peeking out from under the couch of all of them at the Keyblade Graveyard before the Seekers had shown up… but as Kairi’s eyes were now swimming with tears at who Sora had become, she couldn’t see any of this and almost stormed out. And it was only the knowledge that she'd lose Sora forever if she did, that kept her rooted to the spot. …But at the Keyblade Graveyard this last time (how Kairi loathed that place), when the fabled Master of Masters had admitted that he was, in fact, Sora... and had then tried to explain to just Kairi all that he'd done and agreed to run away with her when she’d asked… he'd promised her that he was done sinning. Was he going back on his word now? "Sora," Kairi urged, as she took a deep breath and crawled into his lap—though making sure to not do so in any way that could be read as sexual, so as to honor the agreement they'd just reached. The princess just really needed him to focus on her and the here and now, didn’t she?—"can you- can you talk about everything that happened? Or what went on in your heart then, and still seems to be now? …I think this is the only way we can really save your heart from all the imaginary burdens it thinks it needs to carry-” But Sora was already shaking his head, as he pushed Kairi away—almost accidentally knocking her to the floor as he did so, as if he was afraid of her?—and looked at her with a sad eye. "I can't be saved, Kairi... Not even by your light. The Sora you knew is dead... and I don't even deserve that name. …That's why  I chose a new one, that better suits me now. And if you- if you want to still call me Superbia… if that’s easier and helps you to understand… you can do it. And if you also want to leave, because I won’t talk to you… you can. "I would, however, love to hear about you. Tell me all that's happened in your life." And Sora was holding both of Kairi's hands now, as he brought her back into his embrace--they'd always loved to hold onto each other this way, hadn't they?—and Kairi choked back a sob. And Kairi's reaction there didn't go unnoticed by Sora, who looked like he was going to cry himself for having hurt her, she imagined. "Kairi... despite everything I just said, I- I'm trying to be like the old Sora for you right now. So why should that upset you? Tell me what I’ve done here, and I’ll try and fix it!" But as soon as those words left his mouth, Sora—no, Superbia. And that was exactly the problem, wasn't it?—he seemed to have figured out the answer himself: the one that Kairi couldn't bear to tell him, and probably never would: that at the moment, he wasn't her Sora—not when he seemed to refuse to try and work out his own issues and just pretend that everything was alright, when it was anything bit—and that meant him actinglike he was killed her all the more right now. Despite everything, however, Kairi was still very protective of Sora… maybe because she thought he’d suffered enough. Because maybe- maybe he was right. Maybe everything was meant to have happened this way. What did she really know, anyway? And would she have acted any differently if things had been in reverse? But Kairi also didn’t want to think about any of this at all—to imagine herself in such a way. So perhaps Sora wasn’t the only one acting here—and so she quickly feigned that she needed to go to sleep, so she could just go to her room and get a handle on her emotions. And though Kairi was terrible at feigning anything… Sora—and perhaps he really was Sora, and becoming him more and more again—didn’t poke a hole in her logic even once. And instead watched her go with a smile, despite the fact he was surely lonely, and wished her pleasant dreams. And Kairi just curled up in her makeshift bed for the time being, and tried to keep her tears from being heard—as she thought about the only dates she’d had with Sora before this, that had been filled with light, even in his last moments, and now… now she was dating him in darkness, wasn’t she? … When Kairi woke up the next morning, she found her lucky charm by her bedside--and it made her heart sing, to know that Sora had kept it this whole time—and while Kairi was somewhat disheartened that he had now given it back to her (for she had meant for him to always keep it), she knew he had been trying to make her feel better. So Kairi tucked it into her shirt, beside her heart. The next thing that was on the agenda for Kairi, was finding the kitchen and finding something to eat. She suddenly realized that she was ravenous, since she’d been too upset to eat any dinner the previous night. And the moment Kairi’s feet touched down on the floor tile of said room, she was hit by the delicious aroma that was pancakes. Sora had learned to make them from Aqua, the night before they went to the fated place… And seeing the man doing something so domestic… and normal at the moment, said more to Kairi that this was her Sora than anything else had. It made her heart long for him in a way that it hadn’t in a while, since at first Kairi had thought death had separated them, and then she had realized that Sora had caused the first Keyblade War, and much more. "Kiss me, Sora," Kairi whispered, the moment he looked up from his work at her... At her words, Sora accidentally spilled his mixing bowl onto the floor in his shock, but neither of them cared. "Kairi… we talked about this. I don't- I don't want to do anything sexual with you. At least not yet. Not until I've earned it… 'sides, you sliding up here and asking me for a kiss—instead of letting the moment come naturally—is… well, it’s kind of awkward..." Kairi slammed her fists into her pockets as Sora retrieved his bowl, and she walked up to him angrily—ready to bawl him out—the way she would've when they were fourteen. She also wouldn’t deny that Sora turning her down in such a way made her feel as though she was some undesirable, hideous monster. That thought had her blinking back tears, and was surely part of the reason she was behaving so emotionally now. "But don't you think we've waited long enough?! And believe it or not, Sora, I can control myself. And our hug in the Castle That Never Was was awkward, and yet we realized we were in love with each other not long after that. Maybe this could give us that magic, too." With each word she’d spoken, and the expressions that appeared on Sora’s face with each passing moment, Kairi felt as though she was stabbing the love of her life with a knife over and over again. But she could also tell that he was furious at himself… for being hurt herself—because of him—and for his not being able to meet her needs right now, in his own mind, but perhaps for reminding him of her imprisonment in the World That Never Was more than anything else. And maybe it was that thought—of how much they’d suffered, and how much time they’d lost—that made him finally give into her. The Keyblade wielder ran to her and put his callused hands on Kairi’s shoulders almost roughly, as he growled out a "fine". And as they both glared at each other, before they, ironically, leaned into each other, Kairi was actually preparing herself for the worst kiss she’d ever have. Because surely their anger here would keep them from having any good technique… But it didn't end up being that way at all. It didn't end up sexual, either—they both kept good on their promise there—but Kairi knew it could have easily become that way, if they'd let it. It instead just felt like... destiny, and as if they'd finally come to where they’d always belonged in the multiverse. Sora was gentle and loving with Kairi and tasted surprisingly of peaches: something the princess wasn't complaining about at all. His arms were wound around her waist tight, like hers had his at that castle, as he brought her closer to him and spun her around once. Kairi couldn't help but giggle against Sora’s lips, and as she felt so safe and warm in his arms here… despite everything. And Sora seemed more than content with Kairi's own actions, too—as she leaned her chest against his, and began pressing kisses on his cheeks, forehead, nose, neck, and eventually his chest. Then, he practically purred: "Kairi, I love you." But those three, beautiful words that Kairi had wanted to hear more than anything else in the world were completely ruined by the man that he had become—that was still a mantra that Kairi kept having to tell herself in her head, to keep them from crash landing—and it was like a bucket of cold water had just been poured onto her, as she registered this. If you love me, how could you do things you knew I'd hate, then? Kairi wanted to ask but knew that she couldn't: not now that she and Sora had been at such a good place again. So, in order to force herself to remain silent, Kairi made up some excuse about going to go get them something to eat from a restaurant—since most of the pancake batter had bit the dust—and bolted. And she imagined that it was hard for Sora to let her go. But he still let her leave… and when Kairi came back he looked at her and said he shouldn't have kissed her. And Kairi was about to let him have it for this—for taking away pleasant thoughts of their first kiss—but then he explained where he was coming from, and she somewhat got it, "I should've taken you on a date first." And Kairi laughed, despite herself, and perhaps found a little more of herself. "I think it's fitting of us, Sora. Remember when we used to poke fun at each other? You got mad at my waking you up, and calling you a lazy bum; and I never believed some of your stories, come to think of it..." And Sora smiled so widely at her words, it was like the sun had shone for the first time. And with that, Kairi was taken back to when she, and Sora, and Riku had used to hangout on the Play Island together… and how she had always cuddled that Sora. She… wanted to do that with this one now. And whereas before, she wouldn’t have known what to do with that feeling… this one was making it easier to reconcile those conflicted thoughts. "…Right you are, Kairi! I remember it. And I think… I think it’s why I first fell in love with you," Sora admitted; and Kairi was so surprised and in love, that she almost cried. Because as Kairi understood it... though Sora had crushed on her some, he hadn't realized he was in love until long he was near sixteen. Had she been wrong about that? "Kairi… I want to take a step in the right direction. I’ll- I’ll go to prison, and then maybe we can have that shot at a normal life that we both still want.” All Kairi could do here was fall to her knees like Sora himself just had—as the weight of what he needed to do surely hit him… that he would do, because it was right. And, despite everything, he was still Sora and at least tried to do that—and she held his face in her hands and leaned her forehead against his. “And I’ll stay in a prison cell, too.” Kairi knew that Sora would be against what she was saying… but she needed to be together with him. And if this was the only way to do it, then so be it. Kairi kind of thought that she deserved this, anyway, since she hadn’t suffered as much as the others and her imprisonment by the Organization had been much better than Naminé’s. And if she’d been stronger and kept herself from being captured sometimes, maybe Sora never would have had to become what he had. But surprisingly, Sora didn’t protest Kairi’s decision. And in that, Kairi thought this was the man who had finally grown to see her as his equal in the Keyblade War and no longer told her to stay behind. Instead, Sora’s mouth whispered against hers, this: “It’s not the world I meant to show you, but it is a world. …I guess we’ll start there.” And a broken smile spread out on Kairi’s face. And that was a beginning, too. Author's Note: Dedicated to Phoenix-Downer, because the two of us have had some discussions about what a Master of Masters!Sora and Kairi might act like in such a situation (or moreover, I babbled some of my headcanons to her and she was kind enough to listen), so some of this was definitely born from that. And I certainly found inspiration from her "More Than Meets the Eye" fic, too!

[echoheart0324]

Something else to consider: Brain and Ava seem to have been pretty close prior to the Keyblade War. Yet up until this point he's been nothing but SUSPICIOUS of Ava's intentions and judgement. What did she do to warrant that 180?

…I actually have no clue.

Well, I guess, I’ll see what I can pick out from the beginning and go from there. Let’s see how the game portrays his feelings about Ava in the current day:

The odd thing about this cutscene here is that, when Brain teases Skuld of her likeness to Ava, his face remains mostly neutral (even when Skuld replies back and Ven chimes in), while everyone else smiles. He only reacts with a smile once Ephemera says the phrase above.

I guess that could be interpreted in multiple ways, either being 1) he’s smiling because of their bickering as friends, 2) for sprite variety I guess, or 3) he agree(s/d) with Ephemera, and is reminded of his time(s) with Ava.

However, like you said, his smile immediately drops after a second or two, where he then expresses his doubts about her.

I guess it could be seen as him trying to test out the waters of seeing how much they’re willing to throw fate off-course, as Ava told him he could try to alter it if he really wanted to. Could be that, or I guess his opinion of Ava really did shift heavily after 4 years. (And we’ll probably never know cuz his expressions are practically just guesswork since his eyes are covered.)

()()()

(Fan translation from Everglow used above, cuz the official translation for this scene isn’t out yet)

The only other time he’s mentioned Ava is when they’re discussing the trap they’re in and who could’ve had the motive to do so. However, he still seems to kinda give Ava the benefit of the doubt about the whole ‘data prison’ situation. So in a way, I think he still thinks at least decently of Ava at this point in time, as he didn’t blatantly accuse her for the mess they’re in.

()()()

Finally, when thinking about Ava in the flashback from the most recent story update as well, he seems kinda sad (or bitter I guess? It’s kinda hard to tell. It could be just his thinking sprite for all I know). This isn’t relevant that much, but I just wanted to bring it up.

()()()

Based off all the stuff above, I kinda wanna say we’re missing a final interaction between the two, since I’m sure they had time for at least one more conversation between that 4 year gap until the war. Maybe Ava said something to him after her encounter with Luxu, upsetting Brain to some extent? (There’s also the fact that he expresses jealousy in Ephemera and Player’s friendship, which the official translation missed the point of entirely by making him sound all dreamy instead).

()()()

Now to actually answer your question. Some things that could warrant this could include:

1) The two could’ve had a fight (most likely being verbal) on the whole situation at a later time, as any argument could technically soil any bond, no matter how strong, which could explain his sudden distaste in Ava, but meanwhile still having a decent respect for her. (I think this one might have a decent chance, and could hint at why Brain just left the BoP in the chambers unattended anyway.)

2) Four years is a fairly long time, so it’s possible that his opinion of her just simply changed (just as his stance on not opening the Book as much as possible, changed, where even Ven points out that he’s always seen with it).

3) Something in the Book could’ve implied something about Ava, tipping Brain off and acting more cautious than he did before. Less likely than the other two options, but still a possibility.

4) It could literally be anything else, cuz Nomura’s unpredictable when it comes to KHUX.

To sum it up, there’s not enough info at the moment to really assume much right now, but wildly draw some vague lines together, and this is as clean as my thoughts get. Otherwise, I can’t really think of anything else from the top of my head.

(Feel free to add on y’all, cuz my mind is drawing a heavy blank right now. May reblog with more stuff later, if I remember anything in the morning.)

[ladykateofledfordpark]

All the Time in the World (Dan x MC)

This fic is inspired by day 24 of the Choices July Challenge hosted by the amazing @kinda-iconic under the profile @choicesjulychallenge !

Dedicated to @mariaoz and @lady-kato , my wonderful friends who helped me so much in this fic!

Tagging also the wonderful @jlpplays1 @itsbrindleybinch and @desiree-0816 ! You’re the best! =D

Day 24 Prompt: Memories

Pairing: Dan x MC (Jade)

Summary: Prom arrives, and Jade has no date. Is this the perfect opportunity to do something?

Unedited.

--------------

Somehow, after everything they endured, prom arrived. Dan didn’t know what to expect from it, but he hoped this time he won’t end up staring at Jade the whole dance.

If he was honest, he didn’t really know how exactly it happened. After the terrible ordeal in Mr. Red’s house, Dan found himself growing closer and closer to Jade. He may have been closer to Stacy beforehand, but life changed the both of them. Stacy started hanging more and more with her cheerleader friends, while he drifted away from them. Jade was so kind, so welcoming, Dan quickly realized how much he missed her in all those years they were apart. Somehow, he felt like she was the only one who understood.

So he opened up little by little, until one day he reached an unsettling realisation.

He trusted her. More than the others of the group, more than his family, more than anyone else. Jade was the first person he would turn to when he needed help, and he hoped she saw him the same way.

“Hey,” Dan approached Jade once the dancing started. She sighed, but didn’t look at him immediately. Her posture was stiff as if she was standing in the spotlight, one of the worst experiences Jade could ever experience. He traced her gaze to Lucas, who was dancing awkwardly with Ava. She didn’t look heartbroken, but rather bitter.

“I could’ve been there. At least then I would have someone to dance with,” Jade pouted. Dan smiled, and when Jade’s eyes met his a similar one bloomed on her face. 

“You’re acting as if being single at prom is the worst thing that can happen to a person.”

“Almost as bad as being Prom Queen.”

“At least then you don’t have to dance alone.”

Jade laughed. “True.”

They watched the dancing couples, and something about the sight made Dan itch to do the same. A part of him urged him to do that, while the other whispered for him to run as fast as possible somewhere safe and Jade-less.

He decided to go with a compromise.

“Let’s head outside.” 

It wasn’t a strange request. In their friendship, Dan and Jade spent many evenings outside, sitting and talking about whatever they wanted. They both preferred that simple quality time over anything else, and these meetings were Dan’s favorite moments of the day.

But if he was honest with himself, every moment with Jade was a treasure.

They walked outside and sat on a cold bench. Usually, Dan was very at ease with Jade, but now he fidgeted. Not every day could he find himself sitting in a tux next to a beautiful girl in a shimmering gold dress. This situation was familiar yet still strange, almost as if it was a dream he once had and forgot. And maybe he did. Ever since Winter Formal he’d been hoping for this moment, in which he would take Jade’s hand and ask her how she felt.

And he would totally do that... at some point. Which was not today.

Dan gazed at his surroundings. Behind him stood the whole school structure, while ahead of him lay the fairly-packed parking lot. To his right was the forest, and to his left the town. Just like always he sat there, wondering what he would have done if he was here so long ago. How would it have been to watch the skeleton monsters attacking homecoming?

Maybe, if he wasn’t under Redfield’s control, he could have… no, would have come. Maybe, in this moment, he wouldn’t be shifting uneasily because Jade would already have given her answer.

However, that wasn’t the case. Something, maybe some force up in the sky, decided then that he needed to be a weird zombie version of himself. He did get the short end of the stick, for sure, but his moment with Jade, deep in that forest, made one thing clear. They shared something special between them, and Dan was lucky he had the opportunity to explore it further.

“It’s nice out here. Cool and comforting.”

Dan met Jade’s eyes, and at that moment he wished he could capture her in a photo. The way her eyes shined, as if she was a brand new person, set his heart pumping faster than he knew was good for him.

Somehow, she succeeded in making his body act like that. Just like, so long ago, she managed to help him escape from Redfield’s control.

Jade really was something special, undoubtedly.

“Doesn’t it bother you seeing Lucas like that?” Dan found himself asking. He shifted slightly, and somehow his arm brushed hers. A strange rush of warmth passed through him, but he forced himself to act nonchalant. The last thing he wanted to do was to give Jade any unease.

She shrugged. “We parted on good terms, and it was fairly mutual, so… no. We’re still great friends, but more like Lily and I. Nothing romantic there.”

“Really?”

Jade didn’t answer immediately, as if she was weighing her words carefully. “Honestly, we’ve been more like friends for quite a while now.”

Dan studied Jade carefully. She shied away from him, refusing to meet his dark eyes. What was she trying to say? Was he wrong to hope that maybe-

“That’s why you broke up?”

“One of the reasons.”

Before Dan could say something else, Jade changed the subject. “I’ve missed you, you know. Back then, with Mr. Re- I mean, Jane.”

“When, exactly?”

She blushed. “Well, I’m not sure exactly. Maybe ever since you entered the hospital, and the rest of us got to know one another better. Maybe… later.”

Dan swallowed. Why was there suddenly so much tension between them?

“Later?”

It was strange to see an uncomfortable Jade. If Dan himself wasn’t nearly as flustered, he may have reveled in it. “Later as in…” she released a heavy breath, “um… homecoming.”

“Oh.” Would she have asked him out if he was awake then? “I wish I could have been there.”

Jade swallowed. “Yeah, but… you’re here now.”

“I am.”

She turned, so she was once again looking into his eyes. Her shoulders were set like that of a warrior’s, and her eyes were more exasperated than ever. “So… do you want to dance, as a way to make this up to me?”

Was it him, or was her voice still slightly uneven?

“Alright, if you’re sure.” Dan hesitantly answered. He got up and held out his hand, as if he actually knew what he was doing. Jade smiled before she put her hand in his. Her body was still tense, but her steps were confident, as if she knew exactly what she wanted. She led him far away from the bench, so they had enough room to comfortably dance.

“So, what exactly are we dancing?”

Jade’s eyes sparked. “Let me pretend, for one moment, that I’m not single.”

He swallowed. “Slow?”

How did his heart manage to pump even faster?

“Got it in one.”

“Alright.”

Jade’s arms circled his neck, and Dan forced himself to wrap his own arms around her waist. Somehow they started swaying to nonexistent music, almost as if they were rehearsing for a big scene at the end of a play.

This was strange, but since when was his life not unusual?

“Not bad,” Jade smirked, “almost lets me forget that I still don’t have a prom date.”

Was it too much to say that he wanted to be her date?

“Don’t look so tortured,” Jade laughed, “there’s more to this dance.”

“Of course,” Dan smiled weakly, and Jade’s smirk immediately disappeared.

“Are you uncomfortable? Because if there’s someone else you want to dance with, it’s okay. I was only joking.”

Dan didn’t know what to say. “No! This… is nice. Like really nice. I-”

A slow smile gradually rose to Jade’s face, and she daringly pulled Dan closer. He could swear that at that moment his heart beat as if he just ran a marathon, and his breaths grew quicker and shallower. Did she notice his strange behavior?

“I have one more question.”

Dan nodded uncertainly. “What is it?”

The mischief twinkled in Jade’s eyes, and once again Dan was struck with how beautiful this girl was. He needed to come closer, but there was no way he would force himself on her like that.

So he forced himself to stay put as Jade’s warm breath touched his ear, her lips whispering words he never thought he’d hear.

“Kiss me.”

Dan froze. He blinked as all the doubts in the world rose inside him. He was probably just hearing things. There was no way that-

“Of course, you don’t have to, but it will help me. And friends help each other, don’t they?”

“Yo-you’re absolutely sure?”

She pulled him so close that their heads were nearly touching. Jade smiled, the sight sending strange tingles down Dan’s whole spine. “Positive.”

She gazed at him expectantly, and a small smile rose to Dan’s face. He gently cupped her face, his thumb rubbing gently on her cheek, before he lowered his head. His lips carefully brushed hers, and suddenly Jade kissed him back. It was strange, this feeling, but Dan dreamed of this moment for years, and he wasn’t going to let anything ruin it. Not his doubts, his worries, his messed-up life. Nothing.

Once they parted, Jade beamed at him. She searched his face for something, and once she found it her smile grew even larger. She laughed wholeheartedly, and Dan gazed at her with all the affection he could muster. This was so amazing, the last thing he wanted was this all to be a means for escape.

“I’ve waited for this for quite a while,” Jade smiled.

“How long?”

“Longer than you, I’m sure. You know, I broke up with Lucas because of you. It’s just that Lucas and I weren’t much of a couple anymore, and… well, I started having feelings for you.”

“Really?”

Jade nodded. “You never take a hint, do you?”

“Well…”

Jade laughed. “No, you don’t have the guts. I had to do it all, huh?”

His cheeks heated up. “I’m sorry. I should have-”

Jade’s warm hand tilted his head so he looked right at her, her eyes so much darker and deeper than before. “You’re cute when you’re flustered.”

Somehow, they started dancing again. Dan sunk in the sea of his thoughts, until one floated to the surface. “So what are we now? Are we still friends?”

Jade shook her head. “I’m friends with Lucas, Dan. But you… well, if you don’t mind, I’d like to go out on a date.”

“I’d be happy to.”

Jade’s cheeks reddened slightly. “Good. At least I won’t be single anymore.”

Dan smiled at her, and she winked at him. A strange sense of content settled on both of them, and so they continued dancing like that. Slowly, yet as if they had all the time of the world in their fingertips.

And at those moments, Dan could’ve sworn that really was the case.

[sinsofafangirl]

I Fell In Love With The Devil - - Jacob Seed x Deputy.

Chapter 1.

When Ava 'Rook' Sanders first passed the police academy she thought her job would entail arresting the drunks, disorderly and the other usual things that officers have to deal with, not an entire army of batshit crazy cultists who had an impressive amount of artillery at their disposal including air support. It was said air support that had almost killed her and the US Marshal by shooting the concrete and iron bridge they'd been racing over, the now bullet ridden pick up they'd stolen now flying head first into the dark waters of the river below. Ava barely had time to inhale deep enough before the vehicle hit the water with an almighty splash, the cabin of the truck starting to fill immediately and the first tendrils of cold water grasped at her body and if her head hadn't collided with the dashboard with enough force to almost knock her out cold she probably would have started to panic but thankfully her mind had just enough clarity to kick her survival mode into gear and rather groggily she manoeuvred herself free from the seat and out of the open window. The young Deputy willed herself to make it to the surface refusing point blank to die in this backwards hell hole; her head throbbed and her lungs ached painfully in desperate need of air but she didn't stop until she was met with the gentle night breeze - her mouth opening and closing like that of a fish out of water as she tried to gulp as much oxygen as she could to sate her lungs.

"There's the other one, grab her before she gets away" was the only thing she heard as she clumsily pulled herself onto the grassy land, her hands to wet to grip anything and the mud beneath her made it that much more difficult for her to get to her feet "Rook! Run, run Rook!" her head turned towards Burke who had unfortunately already been caught and was now down on his knees, his words got him the butt of a gun to the side of his head for his troubles but the man had caused a distraction long enough for Ava to scramble to her feet and make a dash for it leaving her out of the grasp of the Peggie and him reaching for thin air "shit, go after 'em. Go, go!"

Sounds of shouting, gunfire and all around chaos faded the further she ran. Her feet and lungs protesting every step she took but her mind as groggy as it was told her if she stopped they'd find her and that just wasn't an option. It didn't take long until Ava spotted a watch tower not far from the wooded clearing and her heart soared in victory at finding somewhere well enough out of sight that she could use to catch her breath, take note of her injuries and try to get her bearings. Her movement now slow and purposeful as she made her way towards the chipped blue ladder that had clearly seen better days, the last thing she wanted was to step on a twig like one of those idiots you see in horror movies and give herself away, so she treaded carefully until her hands gripped the cold metal and silently she climbed until she reached the top making sure she was still somewhat alone before stretching herself out and breathing a sigh of relief at the temporary break in the shit storm.

Ava didn't know how long it had been since she'd escaped from those crazy fucks but she did know it was only a matter of time until they found her. If she could get to somewhere that had a radio or perhaps a weapons cache then she'd definitely feel better about the situation but that only happened in video games or to those that were extremely lucky - Ava was anything but lucky and as she carefully descended the ladder her mind pondered if breaking her moms mirrors when she was six had anything to do with it. Her mom was from a high class family who looked down upon those less fortunate, always made sure she had the best of everything and was one of the most imperious people she had ever known which explained why her mom had a room full of expensive mirrors that she'd collected over the years from the smallest hand held mirror to the largest one money could buy her mom had them all purely so she could preen and compliment herself from every angle. Ava had only been six years old at the time and even though she knew not to play in 'mommy's special room' the young child couldn't help but be curious as to what was hiding behind the door and decided that it was time for an adventure, her small hand pushed open the door and immediately she gasped at the sight; for a six year old child it was a sight to behold to witness all of these shiny mirrors in front of her. Fast-forward to being caught by her mom, a playful game of hide and seek on her part and a very angry mother in a room full of delicate items, well you can imagine the absolute horror when Ava tripped, stumbled and almost fell into one of the mirrors setting off a domino effect that left the majority of the room a complete and utter mess. Safe to say her mother was absolutely furious and punished her by taking all of her toys away for a month. Back then she cried and cried over it but now, she couldn't help but smile at the memory and praise her six year old self for pulling such a stunt even if it was by accident.

Her feet hit the floor with a soft thud as her gaze wandered over the bushes and trees in front of her, her ears strained to catch any sort of sound that was remotely human but she was met with nothing but silence. Taking this as a good sign Ava spun round on her heels deciding that she would try her luck with an hopefully abandoned cabin she'd noticed briefly in hopes of finding a weapon of some sort or a map but as she turned her eyes widened as the butt of a rifle collided with her skull making her drop to the floor. Her vision blurred as a large figure loomed over her making her scramble backwards in panic, her hands pushing her away from the figure as fast as possible ignoring the sharp twigs and stones that cut into her palms - the saying that hindsight is a wonderful thing floated around her brain making her want to slap herself but it was too late now and her back was against a wall, well tree but it didn't matter to Ava. She was stupid enough to linger for too long and now she'd gotten herself caught. She just prayed that whatever death they had in store for her was quick and painless. 

Her vision now clear enough to focus Ava willed herself not to show fear in front of the man but considering how fucked she was and just how intimidating he was the whole no fear thing really was a moot point. Her eyes landed on the green army jacket covering his torso and almost immediately she wanted to smash her head into the rough bark behind her.

J. Seed

Of all the siblings she had to get caught by it had to be Jacob fucking Seed. The murderous mountain man that tortured people or so she'd read a few hours earlier when a manila coloured file was handed to her with bits and pieces of information regarding the cult and the Seed family.

"When my scouts told me that they'd lost you I was a little disappointed but not surprised. However, when they tracked you down here I gotta say I expected more coming from a junior deputy but no matter, you'll learn or you'll die trying"

A bitter laugh fell from her lips which she regretted immediately from the glower he was throwing her way "somethin' funny, pup? The way I see it is you either come willingly and in one piece or I let you go and hunt you down with my judges and they rip you to shreds, your choice?" her gaze fell onto the growling wolves beside the scouts and Ava knew she'd never have a chance with them after her but that stubborn part of her refused to give in so she met Jacob's gaze and replied with "game on" before bringing her foot up and kicking the ginger man as hard as she could in the face before scrambling from the ground and running as fast as she could in the opposite direction. Jacob brought a hand up to his lip only to be met with a patch of crimson staining his fingers, a smirk tugged at his lips as he picked up his rifle and shouldered it Before signaling for his men to go after her. Both men and wolves took off in the direction she'd ran aside from one who stayed by Jacob's side "nice night for a hunt ain't it, boy"

[unholyhelbig]

can you do either 73. “Can I at least buy you a coffee? For old times sake” or 76. “I feels like everyone just forgot I exist” for either mitchsen or bechloe?

#73: “Can I at least buy you a coffee? For old times sake.” 

[A/N: Man, you guys all want the angst, huh? Anyway, if you guys click on that link above this, then you can still check out those numbers and send me more prompts anytime.]

Her pension for ignoring the obvious was something that Chloe Beale had always hated about herself. It wasn’t that she didn’t’ pay attention, because she did, really. It had to do with the simple fact that she was the type of person to go all in when it came to everything. When she focused, she focused with every inch of her being. When she smiled, it was the brightest thing in the world. When she loved she loved with her whole self, and when she was wounded- when she was wounded it was all she could feel.

Chloe Beale felt like she had a hole right where her heart should be.

That was the deepest and darkest pain she ever allowed herself to feel; Sure, she was sore. Her body ached at the constant sobbing that ripped at her throat the past few days. Her eyes were red and burned. Her nose raw as she tried to muster enough confidence to keep her throat from collapsing.

She had forced herself into the cold Brooklyn winter for one thing, and one thing only; being human. It had been a week since she walked in on her husband and her receptionist. How Cliché. The man she had given every ounce of herself to went to the woman who she trusted with her trade secrets. Chloe threw both of them out before stifling her cries enough not to wake her daughter. Her sweet five-year-old daughter who was just as preceptive as her mother.

That night she called Aubrey, barely able to speak, but with her, she didn’t’ really need to say much. She offered to take Ava for the week and Chloe readily agreed. She had to sort things out- she had to wordlessly pack Gabriel’s things and call up a lawyer that would be powerful enough to ensure that she had prime custody of their daughter. Everything so heightened and real that she didn’t’ allow herself to feel, she didn’t allow herself to do anything other than keep herself busy.

Of course, that hadn’t lasted. And Chloe found herself curled up in a tight ball on the cold tiled bathroom floor at three o’clock in the morning when her mind wouldn’t settle, and her tired eyes refused to close. She had lurched a few times, emptying the contents of her stomach until there was nothing left but a sickly bile.

The next morning, she forced herself to clean up the best she could, until she looked presentable enough to head to the nearest coffee shop (though, that wasn’t too hard to do in the brunt of New York City.) Which is exactly why she found herself in this situation now.

Her hurt had washed away for a split second as a flash of guilt ate away at her. The icy sidewalks giving way to a rushed attempt at getting back home. Back to the heat and back to the little corner, she had designated to herself in her dark bedroom. Her fingers clenched the Styrofoam cup in her hand, the hazelnut liquid never giving way to her lips.

Instead, it ended up coating a near stranger- a woman who kept her head down as her arms lifted a bit, eyes undoubtedly focused on the now scalding liquid that dripped down her jacket and created a small puddle on the ground. It was freezing by now, the collar of a white button-down peaking from the black peacoat, the woman’s own coffee and the little bag of pastry resting in her right hand.

She glanced up then- her breath catching, no longer sprouting little clouds into the air. Her nose looked raw from the cold, her lips slightly parted as she finally let the little edge of breath puff out in a long-awaited release.

Beca Mitchell looked older.

Her once spark-filled midnight stare still had a certain glow behind it, but it was wiser, it was more in tune with the person she had become. Her hair fell against her shoulders in perfect waves, her shoulders more defined and her stance a little less like a freshman majoring and music, and a little more like a CEO managing a major record company.

Chloe had kept up with the headlines for a bit. It was painstaking, so much so that she would mute the words on her timeline after a while and stop answering the messages from publicists that would inquire about her little fling with the uprising talent in the music world. Chloe was starting a family after all, and she had her education to focus on. Not the girl she used to- still maybe does, have feelings for.

Beca’s eyes quickly softened, maybe noticing the redness of Chloe’s, or the broken pieces that the woman hastily tried to cover up with a half-hearted smile, and a rushed apology that came out in a hoarse response. She cursed herself. Her own voice betrayed her.

“Chloe Beale mustering out an apology is the last thing I ever thought I would hear on a Wednesday morning.” Beca lifted a pointed eyebrow. The same Beca that she knew and loved and missed so heavily was right there behind the business façade.

“Well, I did just pour a whole entire cup of coffee down your shirt.”

“Then let me buy you one.” She lowered her arms, running her fingers against the stain as she let a few drops wick its way into the fabric, most of it flicking off to another destination. “For old times’ sake.”  

Chloe hesitated. She had just spilled a scalding drink over this woman. But it wasn’t just any woman. It was Beca Mitchell. The same girl who hated acapella but ended up leading the group in college with her hand in hand. The same girl who taught her the value of family, and going for what you believe in. The same girl who she thought she let go when LA came into the picture.

The same girl she didn’t’ even invite to her own wedding.

“Beca,” She warned, “I’m buying.”

“Yeah, but I still have my drink. It’s yours that got spilled. Remember?”

She was stubborn and persistent. The glint glowing harder against her stare as she held the door to the little hole in the wall shop back open. Chloe hesitated, but it soon melted away the second she felt the heat that the stone fireplace in the center of the establishment created. And really, if she was to deprive the warmth from Beca (who was without a doubt going to catch a cold now) then what kind of a person was she?

Chloe ducked her head and entered the shop, watching carefully and quietly as Beca easily shed her jacket and placed it on the coat rack by the door. The white of her shirt looked dull in the dimmed lights- and her stare flicked over towards the counter, almost as if asking permission. Chloe nodded softly, following her as she ordered the same thing she always had- a medium cup of coffee with four sugars and two creamers.

They sat at a little table that exposed them to the crackling fire and kept them away from the draft of the door. It was tiny, and Chloe could practically feel the heat of Beca’s knee close to hers. The girl stared at her name written on the side of her cup, not daring to take a sip of the hot liquid just yet.

“How have you been?”

“we don’t’ have to go through the small talk, Chloe.” Beca said gently “Aubrey called me.”

This made her sharp eyes snap up, sitting back in her chair. Why would Aubrey call her? They hadn’t spoken in close to six years- Beca Mitchell was certainly not someone Chloe thought Aubrey willingly associated with. But then again, maybe Chloe didn’t’ know who the blonde aligned her connections to.

“So, I suppose you know everything.”

“Not everything. But enough.”

A bit of a scoff moved past Chloe’s lips. This wasn’t the conversation she thought she would be having with Beca Mitchell. Frankly, she assumed that she would never hear from the woman again. Maybe if they both showed up at their five-year reunion, but neither seemed to answer the invitation that most of the Bella’s responded to with absolute joy.

“Don’t’ do that.” Chloe said “Don’t give me that stupid little head tilt. I don’t need you to be sorry for me.”

“Oh, I’m not.” Beca took a calculated gulp of her coffee, wincing at the bitterness. “I could have told you that Gabriel was an asshole from the beginning.” Chloe winched. “He’s named after a fallen angel, for fucks sake.”

“That’s just in the movies, Bec’s.”

“Right,” She knit her eyebrows together “But all movies have to be inspired by something.”    

[directoravasharpe]

what was the original ending for your latest one shot? i’m a slut for angst

i posted it earlier today but essentially ava turning up one day and them realising that she doesn’t have the tattoo anymore and so she’s been replaced but she still has all her memories and shit but it was too much to write it was way too involved and the sort of thing that deserves like a novel length fic examining that whole possibility but i just do not have the energy for that right now so i didn’t write that. the only bit i had in my head was the actual reveal which would’ve been something like this

anyway i accidentally wrote like 900 words of an alternate ending to the fic it’s sad as shit and it’s literally just the reveal. doing the concept justice would’ve required so much work  and so many words so y’all are never getting that but here’s a completely unedited off the top of my head lil bit of actual prose for how it maybe might have gone

Ava disappears for a day. It’s just a day, it’s nothing unusual. Sometimes they’ve gone a week without talking. Time travel just does that. So Sara’s not worried, not anxious. She just misses Ava, but then, she always does.

When Ava gets back, she’s tired. A little out of it. Sara puts it down to a long day, because Ava has lots of those. It’s not anything out of the ordinary for there to be dark circles under her eyes, or for her to be slightly hazy by the end of a stressful day at work.

Sara’s used to that. She’s good at destressing Ava, at working away the tension, so, half a second after the portal closes behind Ava, she’s in front of her.

“I missed you.”

“It’s been a day, Sara.”

“Still missed you.”

Ava smiles, that same smile, the one she reserves for Sara. “Missed you too,” she admits. Sara smiles back, leaning in, brushing their lips briefly, then harder, because heat is rising through her body.

“You’re wearing too many clothes,” Sara says. “You should change that.”

Ava leans back, raises an eyebrow. “If it’s so important to you, you can change that.”

“Okay,” Sara shrugs, her fingers going immediately to Ava’s blouse. Ten seconds later, it’s on the floor. Her undershirt follows, Sara kissing Ava’s pulse point before pulling the thin fabric over Ava’s shoulders.

She pulls back slightly, admiring her handiwork - Ava, half naked, pink spots on her cheeks, eyes dark.

She doesn’t notice anything off. Or maybe she does, maybe her brain just refuses to acknowledge it.

Sara’s hands slip under Ava’s waistband, running her hands over the skin there. She undoes the button, has one hand on the zip, when she stops, abruptly.

“Sara?” Ava asks. Sara looks up, and Ava is confused, confused as to why Sara had stopped so suddenly, freezing in space.

Forcing her gaze back down, Sara looks at her hand, where it rests on Ava’s hip, and her brain is finally forced to cough up the image it had seen and then immediately filed away.

The image of Ava’s hip being completely clean in the half a second before Sara had her hand over the spot where the tattoo is. Was.

Is.

If she doesn’t move her hand, then it’s still there. Her mind could be playing tricks on her.

She closes her eyes, moves the hand away, kisses Ava, because she needs Ava’s mouth more than anything, but Ava, because she’s Ava (or maybe she isn’t) knows something wrong. She’s pushing Sara away. “Sara. What is it?”

Sara shakes her head. “No. I can’t.”

She’s not looking down. She’s never looking down again. If she looks down, then her world is going to end.

“Sara? Tell me what’s wrong.”

She can’t do anything. Can’t say anything. Her heart is beating out of her chest, and she feels like she’s about to collapse.

“Sara. I love you. Tell me what’s wrong.”

“You don’t, though,” Sara says, bitter. “Not you.”

Ava’s face is confused, searching. Helpless. “I don’t underst-” Something dawns on her face, and she looks down.

Sara can’t help it. All the bitterness disappears at the sight of Ava’s face, and she slams her hand back down against Ava’s hip before Ava can see.

“Fuck,” Ava whispers. “Fuck.”

“No,” Sara says, determined. “No. It’s okay.”

“It’s not, is it?” Ava says, and it isn’t, not really. It’s never going to be. “Just show me.”

Sara doesn’t move her hand, doesn’t budge it from where it’s still pressed against Ava’s skin.

“Show me,” Ava says, more force in her voice, as she tries to mask the water Sara can hear tainting her words. “Fucking show me, Sara.”

Finally, Sara peels her hand away.

The skin is clear, not a blemish in sight. Not even a tiny, tiny, star-shaped dot. Nothing. Smooth skin and a hip bone. Nothing else.

Ava lets out a gasp, stifling it with her hand. “I’m- I’m someone else.”

“No-”

“I’m not me any more. I’m just another,” a sob rips through her body, “just another one of them. Like I always knew I was.”

“No, Ava-”

Ava is backing away, looking more vulnerable than she ever has. She’s wearing nothing but a bra and half unbuttoned pants, and Sara’s heart breaks. She moves forward, trying to pull Ava back in, but Ava shies away.

Her face twists as she speaks. “You always said I was irreplaceable. You can’t say that and then still want me now.”

“I can. I do what I want,” Sara says, stubborn, because, faced with the situation she never wanted to have to face, all she knows is that the woman in front of her has Ava’s memories and her face and the same lines to her body, and she’s damned if she doesn’t still want her.

“You shouldn’t want me,” Ava says, bending down to pick up her shirt, buttoning it back up, quickly. She’s opening a portal before Sara can stop her. “I got the tattoo so you’d know to drop me if it ever disappeared. It worked. You can drop me, now.”

“I don’t want to drop you, you fucking idiot.”

“Tough,” Ava says, walking backwards through the open portal. “I’m sorry, Sara, but I can’t do anything.”

“You could stay.”

“No, I couldn’t.”

[acuppellarp]

Welcome to A Cup-pella, Kieran! We’re excited to have you and Stevie Evans in the game! Please go through the checklist to make sure you’re ready to go and send in your account within the next 24 hours. 

OOC INFO

Name + pronouns: Kieran, she/her Age: 23 Timezone:  MST Ships: Stevie/Chemistry Anti-Ships: Stevie/No Chemistry, Stevie/Any other Evans

IC INFO

Full Name: Stephanie “Stevie” Erin Evans Face Claim: Olivia Holt (Cloak and Dagger gifs only) Age/Birthday: 20, December 11, 1997 Occupation: Apprentice Tattoo Artist & Bike Messenger Personality:  sarcastic, loyal, rude, artistic, charismatic Hometown: Nashville, TN Bio:

As the second youngest child in a family of five, Stevie often felt forgotten by her family. Sure, their parents did their best to make sure that everyone got a little slice of time with Mom and Dad, but a pie split five ways isn’t exactly great. And as much her other siblings seemed okay with everything that was going on, Stevie never felt satisfied. She wanted a normal childhood—she wanted to be like the other girls who got to go to ballet practice or learn piano or do all of that normal childish things that kids often loved to complain about. She wanted to be a kid without worrying about her classmates mocking her for her hand-me-down clothes and second-hand backpack. She wanted to be more than just that poor kid in class.

Family was so important to all of her other siblings, to the point where they were okay with the situation their family was in—going to bed hungry, having the power shut off, their parent’s terse conversations every time the bills came due. Even if it meant the Evans clan was able to stick together, they were okay with shouldering the burden. Stevie saw how Sam struggled being the oldest of them, taking on responsibilities that no teenager ever should. All in the name of family.

By the time she hit high school, Stevie was bitter towards the school system and the world as a whole. She wasn’t as smart as Stacey and while she made it onto the varsity soccer team, she would never be able to compare to Sam. She wasn’t as talented as her older sister, not as smart as her younger sister, and nothing like her brothers. Out of the Evans siblings, Stevie was the only one who didn’t have a future ahead of her. At least, that’s how it looked to her.

So, when her junior year of high school rolled around and she was cut from the soccer team—replaced by a better prospect, a younger, faster, quicker forward—Stevie fell in with a different sort of crowd. They were the kids who hung out under the bleachers and mouthed off to teachers. But, beyond their seemingly skeevy reputations, there was a secret love that they all seemed to share: art. Specifically, graffiti art.

Stevie fell into the world of art head first, learning about tagging and trying her hand at laying down tags whenever she had a free moment. That was how she met her best friend, Brandon, one of the under-the-bleacher-kids who, like her, had an interest in art. He showed her different techniques, playing with spray paint, stencils, and whatever spare bit of wall he could find. The two became close friends and Stevie learned a lot from him. But, as fun as tagging was, she wanted to broaden her vision beyond just vandalizing people’s back walls.

Her senior year, what money she made at her crappy fast food job went to buying herself real art supplies—Copic Markers, paints, canvases, charcoal. Stevie had found something she was interested in and, to her surprise, it was something that she was actually good at. But, art schools cost money and even if she had the huge portfolio that they were looking for, she didn’t have a chance in hell of getting a scholarship.

Brandon on the other hand, he had a shot, a real shot. And when he got that letter, saying that he’d been accepted? They both celebrated his accomplishment, happy that at least one of them would be getting out there and following their dream. But, when Brandon pulled out a second letter, this time addressed to her? It was almost unreal. Stevie opened that letter and saw that she’d been accepted to the City College of New York’s art program under a full scholarship.

The rest of the year passed in a blur, with Stevie going off to college—something she never dreamed of happening. And when she first started her classes, she thought it was everything she had ever wanted. But, the reality of going to school day in and day out when she could be out and about exploring New York? It was a drag. Soon she was ditching class to bike around the city and mingle with the other New Yorkers, just taking it all in.

While this free spirited existence suited her, it did little for her grades and by the end of her freshman year, Stevie was faced with the consequences of her actions: her scholarship was taken away. Everything that she and Brandon had worked hard to secure, gone. Suddenly, Stevie was truly on her own and without her family to fall back on. There was no way she was going back to Nashville—she couldn’t burden her family by moving back in. And, she still had her wits and her trusty bike, which was better than nothing.

Stevie found a job as a bike messenger and fell in love with it. Being a bike courier was fast paced, exciting, and cut-throat in just the right ways. Plus, the courier community was like a little family of nomads, something she really enjoyed. Stevie thrived in her job and was able to get an apartment with a few randoms out in Bushwick—imagine her surprise when she realized that they knew her sisters!

After reaching out tentatively to Sam and Stacey, Stevie has been easing herself back into being a part of the Evans family. She’s not as interested as being a big happy family as her sisters are, but after being on her own, she’s realized how much being a part of something had on her. That desire to find a community of her own is what has Stevie embarking on the next step of her life: becoming an apprentice at a tattoo shop.

Though her parents would probably disapprove if they knew, Stevie loves the idea of creating art that will forever be a part of someone. It’s the permanency she loved of tagging mixed with the finer drawing she enjoyed as well. Plus, there’s a strong community amongst tattoo artists and that’s something that Stevie is attracted to as well. For now, she’s doing the gruntwork at a shop in Bushwick, running late night deliveries on her bike, and spending whatever free time she has drawing up designs at A-Cup with an iced Americano at her table.

Pets: None

Relationships:

Samantha Evans: Stevie never had the closest relationship with Sam. Her oldest sibling was always so preoccupied trying to be a third parent and Stevie found it stifiling. She didn’t like the way that Sam tried to take on responsibility for their family and tried to mother her.  Even after their time apart, Stevie is still reluctant to reach out to Sam because she doesn’t want her older sister to try and mother her again.

Stacey Evans: Though closest in age, Stevie and Stacey couldn’t be more different. While Stacey was talkative and academically talented, Stevie was the kid in school that teachers dreaded. The only thing in common they had was their last name and the Evans family athletiscim. Now that they’re both in the same city, Stevie does her best to keep her sister at arms length—close enough to say hello and appease their parents, but far enough to keep out of her personal life.

Rachel Berry: Out of her roommates, Rachel’s very vocal lifestyle is one that tends to bug Stevie the most. She doesn’t share Rachel’s interest in theater or show tunes; sure, she likes music, but she usually restricts herself to singing in the shower or listening through her headphones. She also isn’t quite sure how she feels about her roommate flirting with her older sister all the time.

Ava Sinclair: While Stevie is generally intrigued by Ava’s accent and her place in the gaming industry, Stevie keeps to herself when she’s at the apartment. She doesn’t really know how to read the quieter woman and as a result keeps her distance. That said, Stevie loves Ava’s cat, Reeses, and often can be found teasing the cat with a laser pointer or some other cat toy.

Dani Harper: As the most laidback of her roommates, Stevie feels most comfortable hanging out with Dani. She’s the most “normal” out of her roommates and Stevie enjoys chatting with her about possible tattoo ideas, often showing Dani designs that she’s drawn up.

EXTRA INFO

Steve-o/@stevienotnicks/fastest girl on two wheels.

Five latest tweets:

@stevienotnicks: handcramps are the worst ohmygod @stevienotnicks: s2g if my asshole neighbor pulls out in front of me again im gonna key his mercedes @stevienotnicks: lowkey miss honey can GET IT jesus @stevienotnicks: feeling creative today. dm me design ideas pls @stevienotnicks: real talk. if cinderellas shoe fit perfectly then why tf did it fall off???

[kawai-kettu]

We need to talk about The Death Cure (2/5)

We need to talk about the Death Cure :

1. The Movie in General

2. Scene by Scene

3. The characters

4. The pairings

5. Random thoughts

Scene by scene

Attack of the train :

- seriously, the level of preparation and timing this first scene would require in real life, to have this train stop at this exact spot, is ridiculous. I loved that scene, but still…. I only accept this is possible because it was awesome to see all of them again. And also, for their common grinning when it succeeds.

- we actually have a clue that they’re picking the wrong wagon : Minho doesn’t react to Thomas banging on the walls of the wagon, only to Thomas’ voice, and said voice comes from further than it should. I actually wanted to strangle Thomas afterwards, because BOY, if your target was Minho YOU SHOULD HAVE CHECKED BETTER. There was a grid on the top of the train, you could have looked inside!!!

- I don’t like the easy, lazy ways to get out of some situations, especially from a series that didn’t have that in previous episodes : a clear instance of that was the Berg shooting at Brenda and Jorge when their car is next to the train, but then the Berg ceases fire, even when the car has stopped, and they send all theit soldiers outside, conveniently not shooting Brenda and Jorge down.

Torturing Minho :

- I love Minho’s hallucination sequence. At first, I read it as a gift to fans, but then I wondered if it also worked as a symbol of Minho’s psyche? It could say a lot : the Glade is seen deserted, seemingly  very recently abandonned, given that there’s still smoke coming from a fire, and hammocs are still hanging. It looks both familiar and gloomy, in a way. I analysed it as a symbol that despite them having left the Glade for a long time, their time in the Glade is still fresh in his mind ; it’s both a comfort  memory and somewhere he doesn’t want to return, and also, linked to the memories of friends, that are both heart-warming and painful given most are dead. …….also, who is this kid that runs through the Glade?? a symbol of Thomas? Of Newt? ……whatever explanation to this sequence, I just loved it, it was absolutely breathtaking and sad too. ……plus, I think it was interesting that his dream ended with a situation of helplessness despite having tried to escape, just like he must feel all day, trapped at WCKD as a lab rat… ç___ç

- also, him running from the Griever, in fright, took me back to The Fever Code. Because we know Minho is not a coward, so it does look like a frantic reflex, and I couldn’t help thinking back of how he got tortured as a kid. ç___ç

- I also love how they illustrate Teresa’s complexity. That first scene we have of her, watching Miho being tortured…. she’s flinching almost imperceptibly, but she’s also forcing herself to look : is she forcing herself to watch this as self-punishment? As a way to prove her allegiance to WCKD (given that Ava is watching her)? Or as a way to make sure Minho is being treated decently?

  On their way to the Last City :

- as fun as the crank tunnel scene was (…..or rather, scary fun, since I kept alternating between chuckling and jumping in scare), seriously, guys??? Turn off the shucking lights of your car!!!! Gods, you really have a death wish….. OR GO FOR IT AT TOP SPEED!!! I also loved that were they not rescued last minute, they would have died here. Because yeah, for the first (?) time, one of Thomas’ crazy plans doesn’t work. He hasn’t planned things through and he fails miserably. It happens again right after this, when they reach the protest ; Thomas wants to run head-first, blindly, to use this as a way to get in (just like he did up until now, save for the train attack that was so obviously a group effort) aaaand…. Jorge tells him it’s not even crazy, it’s unrealistic. This time, there’s no miracle, no spur-of-the-moment solution to be found. And indeed, they barely avoid being killed. I like how this highlights that Thomas is NOT a good leader and should learn not to jump into things. (….is it hopeless?)

- I loved that at Lawrence’s Rebels Headquarters, the Gladers seem to rekindle their link, the special relation between all of them. They clearly ignore Brenda, Jorge or the Rebels for that matter. It’s conveyed both through their dialogues and through the looks they throw at each other. Suddenly, their world seems to make sense again, because they’re together. (GLADERS FOR THE WIN!!)

  At WCKD :

- I liked what they did with Shai, because though some will say this development was to be expected, I didn’t think so. And I sympathised so much with Teresa in these scenes, I think you can really understand why she did all this, trying to save this little girl …..or rather, trying to save everyone, but all these victims were being embodied in a child, innocent and young, ; which is also working really well to explain how terrible this disease is and how important it would be to find a cure. (I think it’s also an echo of the second film, when Teresa smiles when looking at a little girl’s picture, wondering where she went, and is the only one reacting this way, the boys being focused on their own survival).

- that scene with Teresa spotting Thomas through the crowd was absolutely beautiful, and very interesting. I think it’s meant to make the spectator questions, what she’s seeing, if Thomas is really here or if her guilt is playing tricks with her mind…. ……It was perfect I LOVED it so MUCH, oh gods *_____* and then their whole conversation, where each stands by their opinion and you can see the moment Thomas loses faith in Teresa and she feels it, from the way he sounds both bitter and broken, and it hurts them both, and the music was beautiful and….. *sobs* it was amazing <3 “Do you regret?” “Sometimes, but I’d do it again.” “Good.” I would have wanted to be in Thomas’ mind sooooo much, when he’s letting her see him, knowing she’d follow, I wanted soooo much to know how he was feeling at that time.

- I also loved the scene where Ava is having a drink in her office, clearly accepting her defeat…. It was beautiful, aesthetically speaking. Plus, it empathised the difference between her and Janson. Her talking gives the impression she is not willing to do anything for her survival, contrary to Janson. But I think it’s wrong ; she IS willing to do anything, as long as there’s a chance. Now that it’s clear they’re doomed, she’ll let the boat sink while enjoying her alcohol. Janson, on the other hand, is still believing in his chances of survival regardless of how bad the situation is. In a way, he shares this desperate survival instinct with Thomas (.....in a way, I know they have very different values, don’t throw stones at me). I also liked that this is the first hint of Janson rebelling against Ava, in this. It also took me two viewings, to understand how pivotal this scene is, in setting a chain of events, because it’s THAT conversation that leads Janson to order the desperate serum collect on Minho, in an emergency (which had sounded a bit convenient on first viewing).

Interrogation scene :

- Gally interrogating Teresa was made of gold, I chuckled sooo much, but he was convincing too, I mean he was badass *___* and seriously, anyone wanting to write a Cop!Gally fic?? Please?? Plus, him getting angry about WCKD’s torturing Minho was just <3, as well as him being suspicious and protective when Thomas talks with her.

- I think in that moment Thomas hates her, as shown in his coldness to her and heated conversation afer the interrogation. I also think this scene is probably key regarding making him shift his feelings towards Gally. I also loved that Newt stays quiet and silent, even when Gally and Fry are talking about Teresa : on the one hand, it says a lot that he doesn’t stop them when he had been protective about her in the previous movies, but it also says a lot that he doesn’t take part in this conversation, even when we know he’s been suffocated by jealousy not too long ago (is he trying to remain in control and show he’s not affected by the Flare?).

- Finally, I adored the fact that despite her situation, Teresa’s brain is still focused on her scienntific research ; while Thomas lets himself get blinded by his resentment, she’s still very much in control of herself.

- The only thing I would have taken out of this scene, is the conversation between Brenda and Jorge, or rather, I would have kept it, but would not have played it to make it sound like Jorge is “running from a fight” (especially since it makes fucking sense he’s the one going to the Berg, given that in the book, he’s a pilot, so he could have been a pilot too, in another life, in movie!verse. Would explain him knowing so much about this Last City).

Infiltrating WCKD’s HQ :

- this scene of Thomas, Newt and Gally infiltrating WCKD HQ, joining smoothly and silently, was so very cool XD even though okay, guys, I still don’t see why you needed to separate or where you got these uniforms. I’ll forgive you, movie, because it looked so very cool. Also…. did I get a Star Wars reference in this scene of them rescueing the captured Immunes? Because it looked a loooot like the rescue of Princess Leia in A New Hope (which pleased me soooo much as a fan), complete with Skywalker!Newt opening the door of the cell and taking off his helmet after being mistaken for a real soldier <3 it was awesome <3 thank you moviiiiiie for this SW hommage :3 (though honestly, Thomas, how DUMB are you??? LOOK AT NEWT, does he LOOK allright??? He can force the safe, you know he can, so wtf, man up and make him stay there, take Gally with you, you IDIOT!!!)

- I loved the whole elevator scene, with Janson covering his bases now that he can’t count on Ava anymore (gotta love how coldly strategic the man is, even when infected). Also, Teresa looks downright terrified, and I think I misinterpreted this at first : I don’t think she’s afraid of Janson in this, given that she is never shown scared of him in any other scene. I think she’s terrified of Thomas in this. Of Thomas losing control, acting impulsively and rashly, the way she knows he can. We’re shown she knows him well, too : even though he managed to boil in silence for a grand 2 minutes, he ends up bumping into Janson’s shoulder on his way out, and I’m 80% convinced that Janson wouldn’t have smelled something was fishy had Thomas refrained from doing this. So Teresa was right to be terrified. Notice, though, how she manages to actually save the situation and still save her skin, while still pursuing her objective of finding a cure, wasn’t she awesome???? I think it’s also the very moment Thomas starts to believe in her again.

- Also, note that this is the single instance of Newt being snarly towards Teresa (“she’s trying to get into your head”), which sadly sounded like jealousy/illness taking control of him and leading to a self-destruction attitude, kinda (made me wonder if the virus was able to kinda “protect itself” and distorted Newt’s perceptions, so they there would be no tries to cure it).

- ……And gods, Thomas letting his anger get the best of him, taking off his helmet, yelling that there is no cure, is so intense, so stupidly Thomas, it was brilliant.

  - it’s only a side note, but I enjoyed so much Janson’s angry order to shut off the alarm. Because I’m working in an job environement where there are alarms sometimes and it’s the most annoying sound, there’s no one in the whole universe who wouldn’t want it to be turned off once it’s started to ring.

Saving Minho :

- the whole rescuing Minho phase was quite interesting, but what got my attention in this was more Minho (….and Newt’s state deteriorating ç___ç ). Berserk!Minho FTW XD The rest belongs to the pairings section of these comments, save for the fact that for once in this movie, one of Thomas’ crazy last-minute stunts succeeds (whooohoooo).

- I’m basically sold whenever Gally is in a scene, BUT I had been bothered by his last minute rescue of our trio, after their little jump. Well thinking about it during my second viewing, I have to admit it actually makes sense, and Gally’s strategy is wise. Waiting till the last minute to shoot the three soldiers enables him to come closer to his targets (less risk of failing when aiming from this close) plus it gives him a better surprise effect (given that their attention must have been on the trio, and it would have taken precious seconds to realize they’re actually targeted by one of their own). So okay, clever, here, movie.

Fall of the Last City :

- I really loved the whole Rebels attacking the Last City. Not only because the aesthetic here is beautiful, but because it was realistic. I was caught once in a protest that went wrong (….but not that wrong) and I got the very same feeling. Like…. this revolt had good basis, tbh. It was justified, fueled by the unfairness of the situation, the inequalities and the despair of all these people that feel (rightfully so) like they’ve been abandonned and left to die. Yet, once the attack starts, it clearly gets out of control, and instead of a revolt, we’re dealing with wild destruction.

- Gally seems both surprised and somehow mesmerized by that (if I’m not mistaken). And I loved it. I was wondering what was going on in his mind in that moment, really. After his initial reaction, though, did you notice how during this whole mess, Gally stay clear headed, clearly protecting them all, giving out warnings and orders, taking control, combat trained and efficient?? because it was awesome *___*  (my only problem with this scene, really, was that it was risky to keep their soldier uniforms, though really, taking them off was risky too, as they offer protection, so… *shrugs*)

- Also, we get clear confirmation that Thomas was wrong : Lawrence didn’t want time. He wanted a supposed kind of justice, which was probably only revenge or a way to punish and lash out at the people he sees responsible for his fate. But what he starts is actually raw violence, blind destruction, that has nothing to do with justice, and it felt realistic.

Newt’s death :

- I love that this revolution is getting out of control and causing a mess and destruction and is actually another cause of Newt’s death, given that even if it distracts the soldiers, it also prevents Brenda and the boys to reach Newt and Thomas on time. And it is pretty ironic and sad, because the Gladers are the spark that lit this fire.

- I won’t write a lot about Newt’s death. Because it’s been discussed much already. But I liked it, even though I still wishes it had been closer to the books (because I thought it was really cruel, to have Thomas purposely shooting Newt).

- I love the desperate running through hell, the fact that they’re clearly trying, giving it their best, trying to believe despite all odds, that they’re going to make it…. …..but what really gets me are the goodbyes. Newt thanking Minho, which you can read as thanks for being his friend, thanks for having saved his life and maybe so much more. But also, I read it as a “thank you for going to Brenda to retrieve the serum and coming back to me”, as Newt going with Thomas’ lie that it will be okay, that he’s going to make it, all so that Minho doesn’t see the horrible final moments, all so Minho can feel active instead of passively accepting what’s going on. And Gally goes with it too, even though I think he’s the one knowing the most what’s going to happen, he’s almost gentle with them here and it broke my heart.

- I also loved the desperate way Thomas is carrying Newt’s body, because I could easily understand, the way you’re exhausted but still trying and yet it’s not enough, and you just want to collapse and there’s a sob right there in your throat… DOB really delivers there, all through this, his face during the desperate call from Teresa (which, again, is straaaangely happening right before Newt looses it to the Flare).

- I love the way they mannage to show that Newt is still fighting the illness, that he fights desperately to remain in control and kill himself now it’s clear there won’t be any miracles, and I think that Thomas understands this. However, Thomas being Thomas, he denies suicide to Newt (because there’s a hope, there’s always a hope, he’s been through so many desperate moments, and he’s always managed, there’s always hope, just wait a little longer, just bear with this a seond more), and I think he is fueling Newt’s frustration and anger and making it more difficult to remain in control, like a vicious circle of pain.

- as said, I was really touched by Brenda’s running, heroically, flying with this life-saving miracle, but that it was in vain. And Thomas’s reaction, when Newt dies, gods…. The hurt, the guilt, the anger, the silent accusation when his eyes meet with Brenda’s and she’s too late, she’s too late when it was the only moment she should not have been. All with nothing but music, it was heart-breaking. But what made it worse was all of the boys reactions afterwards. Thomas, unable to deal with this, unable to stay, fueled by his guilt and hate (hesitating between hate towards WCKD or towards himself). Gally EDIT : it was not Gally, it was Fryyyyyy (Sorry Fry ç__ç), kneeling, solemn, paying respect to Newt but breaking  down soon after. But worst of all, Minho, collapsing, falling to his knees, like he can’t stand anymore, like his life is over too (reminding me of when he thought, in the Maze, that they were all condemned). ç____ç

Janson and Teresa’s deaths :

- I’m torn, about the last scene with Janson. I like that you’re given a clear understanding of Teresa’ motivations and the line she draws, the difference with Janson (and probably Ava). I also love that neither Teresa nor Thomas reallly stand a chance in a fight against Janson, and we’re reminded that these are teenagers, fighting against a grown man, a trained and cold-minded opponent (even if he’s infected).  I also absolutely love the way Thomas reacts to being shot, in disbelief (probably having felt but a sting, with the adrenaline) and then collapsing; Teresa’s reflexes to stop the bleeding…. but also, in this moment, them rekindling their relation, showing that they are still important to eachother. I also think, in this moment, that Teresa understands that she has lost the fight too, like Ava. Except there’s still someone left to protect, Thomas, and she’s fighting for him with all she has ç____ç On the other hand, and despite all those great things... I loathed the Deus ex Explosions. As well as the suddenly easily breakable glass in the Cranks’ cage. It spoiled the scene a little for me.

- Teresa’s death scene broke me. She’s carried him with the same determination as he carried Newt, but with even more strength, before they collapse. And when she tells him, brokenly, that she tried (an echo of Thomas wanting to try to save everyone), we get this shot of the cure, drenched in blood, and I think in that moment she sees it as a symbol of the suffering she caused, of the price that had to be paid, for one single vial…. *sobs* I also like how much she fights to get him to safety, but also the fact that once he is safe, she just stops. I heard people complaining, saying it was a lazy death because she had time to get into the Berg. I don’t think it was lazy. I think it was suicide. She accepts her fate, smiling, not even trying to get into the berg. Apart from this, I hated the shot of them all watching her fall. But in general, I have mixed feelings about deaths in TMR (I loved Ben’s banishing but hated Chuck’s death, it was too much, too forced).

- On a side note, I loved that Vince takes the time to secure himself before approaching the void, while Minho doesn’t, and also loved the whole group’s reactions, belatedly, to Thomas’ wound.

Epilogue :

- basically, I loved the whole Paradise scene. It was rewarding, as a fan, to see them reaching happiness. Yet, it also broke my heart to watch this, and I loved how, instead on focusing on their happy end, they decided to focus on remembering the ones who are missing. I think that’s what survivors would need. To try not to feel guilty. To try to have something familiar with them. But also to create a link between these people that are basically strangers, a link through the fact that they all lost important people. It seemed incredibly human, to end this trilogy on remembering the characters that were lost along the way.

- ………and Newt’s reading his letter. I don’t know whose idea it was but it’s both emotional, cruel and brilliant ç___ç

[everlarkchristmasgifts]

When the (Gingerbread) Walls Came Tumbling Down - Part II

Link to Part I here

Originally written for the ribbons/bows prompt, but I missed the boat. Again. This looks like it might be turning into a three or four part story, so keep an eye out for the next part soon.

Unbeta’d, just as before. Rated G. Enjoy :)

“She’s incredible, Katniss,” Peeta whispers in awe, but he’s not even looking at her. He’s got her newborn daughter bundled up in a soft pink blanket and huddled against his broad chest. He’s staring down at her like she’s the most miraculous thing in the world. Katniss can’t blame him. She’s pretty sure her daughter is the most miraculous thing in the world, too. “She’s absolutely beautiful.”

Katniss yawns, snuggles back against the pillows and watches them with a smile. “She is, isn’t she?”

“Have you picked out a name for her yet?”

She lets out a breath. She never discussed the names she was considering with anyone; everyone was too busy chipping in their own ideas to listen to any of hers anyway. “Ava, I think. Ava Rose.”

“Ava Rose Everdeen.” He tests it out and grins. “I like it.” He finally looks up at her and smiles. “Congratulations again, Katniss. You were… you were brilliant.”

She smiles back, and she’s convinced she’s never smiled so widely, so genuinely in all her life.

“Thank you.” She balls up her itchy white hospital blanket in her fist. “Won’t Madge be missing you by now?” At a little over eight hours, her labour was mercifully short compared to the thirty-hour horror story her mother relayed, but Peeta’s been by her side for every screaming, sweaty, finger-breaking moment of it. Nearly four hours after the fact now, and he still hasn’t left her side. And she’s not sure she wants him to.

“Don’t worry about Madge,” he dismisses with a wave of his hand, careful not to jostle the baby. “She knows where to find me if she needs me.”

She tugs a thread loose. “She won’t be mad?”

“That I’m with my best friend who just went through one of the most difficult things a human being could ever go through?” He shoots her a wry smile. “No, she won’t be mad.”

Katniss isn’t convinced; she’s not sure she’d be so understanding if her nebulous, non-existent boyfriend disappeared in the middle of the night to attend to a woman giving birth to a child that isn’t even his.

“I wanted to ask you something, Peeta. Something important.”

“Anything, Katniss. You can ask me anything at all.”

“I’ll remember that,” she teases. “I can get you to do anything so long as you’re holding my child.”

Something almost bitter flashes across his face, gone as soon as it appeared. “Probably,” he says. “What did you want to ask?”

“Would you be Ava’s godfather?”

Peeta freezes. Ava lets out a disgruntled little coo, and Peeta starts to rock her again. “You want me to be her godfather?”

“Well, yeah. Who else would I ask?”

Now he glances up at her, his eyes bright with tears and earnestness. “I don’t know,” he says teasingly. “Finn was gunning pretty hard for the role.”

“Finn’s not my favourite person. You are. Well” — she nods towards her sleeping daughter — “second favourite, I suppose. But there’s no one else on this planet I’d trust more with my child than you.”

Peeta stares at her, disbelief written all over his face. He leans forward, gently deposits the baby back in Katniss’ arms, and brushes her stringy, sticky fringe away from her forehead. Before she can blink, he’s setting his hand against the back of her neck, gently pulling her forward, and pressing his lips to hers, firm, dry and warm. Katniss freezes; he’s never kissed her like this before. There’s no heat behind it, just years of affection spilling out into the gesture, and it just might be the best kiss she’s ever had. He pulls back just enough to press another kiss to her forehead and whisper there, “I’d be honoured to be Ava’s godfather, Katniss.”

“Yeah?”

He kisses her forehead again and draws her in for a small hug. “Yeah.”

All of Ava’s presents are wrapped, some topped with huge, star-shaped bows, and others tied up with shining silver ribbons that cascade over the bright, glossy mound like a waterfall. The corners aren’t as neat as Peeta’s, who wraps his gifts with sharp hospital corners and all, but it doesn’t matter. They still look lovely sitting under her modest tree — now her home looks ready for the holidays. But Katniss doesn’t remember wrapping them at all. She doesn’t remember much at all from the past few days.

Too much is circling through her head like a broken carousel. She’s gotten maybe six hours of sleep over the past three days. The more she dwells on her past with Peeta, the more she wonders just how stupid she could have been to miss all the signs. He’s been about as subtle as a sledgehammer with his hints over the years. They slowed down for a little while when he was first with Madge, and as the reality of her pregnancy began to show itself, but it never disappeared. Not once. No matter the situation, he’s always managed to make her feel… treasured.

But how completely emotionally-inept does a person need to be to not recognise what’s going on in their own minds?

She shakes her head. She could drive herself insane with this line of thought. But now that she’s come to the conclusion, all to consider now is what to do with this information? Would she be willing to potentially destroy over two decades of friendship on the rickety grounds of a ‘maybe’?

And what if she’s right and it’s never been a question of ‘maybe’, but ‘when’? What does she do then?

Can she afford not to find out?

Her breath catches in her throat as her front door opens and, instead of the usual over-excited squeals and babble of Ava rushing to tell Katniss all about her day, she’s met with silence.

Katniss rushes for the door, nearly tripping and dying more than once on the assorted debris left behind by a young child. As she reaches the foyer, she lets out a relieved breath at the sight of Ava draped over Peeta’s shoulder, fast asleep, with his arm wrapped securely around her. His other shoulder holds her cupcake-shaped backpack, Peeta’s gift when Ava first started kindy earlier that year.

He spies her watching them in the entryway and presses a finger to his grinning lips. She stares at him, wrapped up in another silly Christmas sweater — he’s got a whole wardrobe of them, she’s sure of it — and his knit hat pulled low over his ears. His nose is bright red, his eyes are shining brighter than any stupid bow she’s affixed to the gifts, and he’s smiling at her like he’s waited the whole day to see her, even though he saw her just that morning, and right then, she knows. She knows for absolute certain:

There’s no way she can afford not to find out.

“Hey,” he whispers. “She must have had a big day; she was fast asleep as soon as I strapped her in.”

“Oh.” Katniss steps forward and reaches out to smooth back Ava’s blonde curls, so like Prim’s at that age. “Probably for the best. I wrapped up all her presents as soon as I got back from work.”

“I can hang around until she wakes up in case she goes nuts, if you want?”

She smiles, shakes her head. “You know you don’t have to pick her up every day, don’t you? I get home in time to get her.”

He scoffs. “Yeah, I know. But I want to, Katniss. Anything to make things a little easier for you.”

She sighs, but knows better than to fight a war she’s sure to lose, even if it’s one she seems intent on starting every time he brings Ava home. “Fine. Go set her down in her room, then. I’ll make us some tea.”

“That sounds perfect.” With a final grin, he sets off down the narrow hallway to Ava’s bright purple room — the room he painted.

The motion of making tea is therapeutic, in a way. She loses herself for a few short, blissful seconds in the pouring and the dunking, adding a spoonful of sugar and a dash of milk to her own, and leaving Peeta’s plain. She sets the cups down on her small kitchen table, one facing the other, and takes a seat to wait.

“She’s out like a light,” Peeta says as he strides back into the kitchen moments later, and makes a beeline for the jar of cookies — made by him, of course — without looking back at her. “Kind of makes you wonder what sort of stuff they’ve got kids doing in kindy these days. Must be pretty crazy if — Katniss?” He glances to where she’s sitting, and frowns. “Katniss? Why are you sitting there?”

“Could you sit down for a little while, please?” she asks, willing her voice to stay even. “There’s something I want to talk to you about.”

[angrypedestrian]

THE TIME IDIOTS EPISODE 310 TITLED “Apologies For The Open Weeping But My BABIES Are Back” MY THOUGHTS:

It has been a very very long week and the knowledge that my beloved time idiots were finally coming back to me is what has gotten me through so apologies that this is both longer and more incoherent than normal

Y’know bless Matt Ryan he has been on a fucking journey and I doubt this is how he imagined his stint as Constantine going

(Aside: who at Warner Brother’s decided of all the properties from Vertigo to try and develop MORE THAN ONCE, Constantine was it? It is a decision that to this day makes absolutely no fucking sense to me and it never will but dear lord has it given us the gift of SWINTON as Gabriel and for that i am 5ever grateful)

still loling that they can’t show him smoking on screen so he just puts out and holds cigarettes L O L

Thank u DC for allowing magic on your shows (take a lesson MARVEL not that i’m bitter about runagays or ANYTHING)

Also i’m currently making my way through the exorcist and it is gr9 y’all should really watch it

Yo Amaya you are looking thirsty at John

Everyone is looking thirsty at John

EVERYONE LOOKING THIRSTY AT EVERYONE (canonically) THIS IS ALL I’VE EVER WANTED

Brandon Routh’s hair is...bad. is he getting ready to film something else during the hiatus like who the fuck is letting that situation happen?

COURTNEY ARE YOU LETTING THIS HAPPEN?

y’all even his stunt double’s wig is better than his current hair

B A D

Caity Lotz dialed up the sassy to 11 this week and it was a BOLD and GOOD choice

So did Gideon THANK U GIDEON

I approve of every interloper clocking what a disaster this team is instantaneously. It is in the air, on the wind, in our spirits

But like for real i can’t believe DC allowed this much textual homosexual content in one episode. we didn’t even have to make it up ourselves! IT WAS RIGHT THERE

i watched that Ava preview while on a fucking conference call at work about salesforce and it singlehandedly kept me from screaming expletives at my boss so thanks to everyone involved in the production of that scene

Ava, girl. Get some fucking chill tho. like any chill. you are a grown ass woman

Love doctor Leo is in the house and i adore him

I’m gonna miss Wentworth he’s just so good in this role and i can’t believe i didn’t understand it until recently. i was A FOOL

Hey can Matt just join this show? ONE MORE DISASTER BI ON THE PILE

I’m glad Kuasa came back with her kickass leather jacket

Lotta real good leather jackets in this ep

NORAH DARHK WHAT A TWIST WOW

How cute do u bet her and Brandon’s kid is? I bet he is so fucking cute

Nate my dude that is...a convenient use of the cold gun. Well done.

Pssshhh see my true face, not until the season finale they have to save up ALL the couch money for the CGI machine

3 GAYS TRAPPED IN THE SHADOW REALM: coming to a theater near you

So which one of them is Yugi?

It’s definitely John

ALSO this show is real casual with their Christianity stuff and it is a gift

MICK AS TEAM DAD MICK AS TEAM DAD

FILLING THE ROLE GOD INTENDED FOR HIM

Zari @ Amayai: Hmmm...? whatever u wanna do honey yr doing great

GOD they are so IN LOVE

Zari is the greatest fucking addition to this show. TAKING A PIC WITH YR PHONE. SHE’S A GENIUS

also: SLINKY

Oh shit that wall shot was straight from the New Mutants movie LOL

Still cool tho i am a sucker for faces in a wall

actually i am really really digging how this whole sequence was shot fucking well done show

GIMME THAT CHEAP ASS HORROR

SARA BREAK MY HEART WHY FUCKIN DON’T YOU

EVERYONE IS BI AND FUCKING

in an alternate version of this show i am 10000% in on Sara/John and my endgame otp, they compliment each other very well in a way similar to sara/rip who are my current muses and reason for being (but with infinitely more SASS, which is the primary thing I am looking for in a ship i am a simple man of simple desires) i could produce a thesis on it so FIGHT ME

Amaya you are too soft and good for this world sometimes

Also did we move the brig to the vague science room? what the hell is going on here? what is time. what is space

Kuasa you are also too good and this scene is fantastic

Zari is such a good

Ray is such a good

They are both goods and this is delightful

SASSY DIAL UP TO FUCKIN 12 thank u Sara

ARGUING OVER WHO SEDUCED WHO YA BIG QUEERS

Okay who of the writers is a fucking NY Giants fan?

OLIVER QUEEN? FACING A CONSEQUENCE???

i know it’s too good to be true

Nate and Mick are also goods but in a very different way and it tickles me

all i ask from this show is to be tickled and HOW I HAVE BEEN THIS EPISODE

...can Sara and John get a spin off road trip adventure web series or something?

i would legit pay for it like at least a dollar

i love that the shadow realm is a blue screen with one (1) sad fake tree

it’s just so on the nose for legends set design that it feels like a wink at me specifically

Amaya @ Nate: hmmmm? you seem fine KUASA MY GRANDBABY

Fuck u Damien (but I love u Neal, I love you so much)

THE RETURN OF THE LoT CAST CAN GET IT WATCH: Neal can still get it

Sara is the sassiest person that I know

SARA GIRL do u not have any chill either?? jesus christ

can anyone on this ship get a single solitary ounce of chill

OH FUCK HE GOT TO LIGHT THE CIGARETTE

he IS cool Ray

HE IS

oh no

leo is having a feeling

mick is having a feeling

AT EACH OTHER

AND HE AND RAY ARE GONNA GET THEIR GAY ASSES HITCHED

FUCK

a WILD RIP YOU SAY???

AND DISCO??

MY HEART

Thank you all for coming with me on this journey

[charmingturkeysandwich]

COMPLETE! Knock, Knock Ch. 27/27

The epilogue is here! I’ve loved writing this story more than I can even explain and I hope that you all enjoy where it’s ended up. It makes me inordinately happy and I hope you can feel at least a little of that. Let me know what you think? Maybe? 

Thank you for reading!

Read on AO3.

Start from the beginning on tumblr.

So many things get easier the older you get, the more life experience you have.

Moving is not one of those things.

Despite having more money, more help, more space, and more time… moving still fucking sucked.

In fact, if it weren’t for the bitter memories of filling up the last house from scratch, Emma would just burn all this shit and start over. But that was an overreaction. She was just stressed. Moving did that to you.

And kids did that to you, too.

The business had been great. In the last year, she and Killian had invested in another whole ship and small crew. They’d been on the water nearly every good-weather day with some kind of touring group, and spent the entire off-season taking classes and attending conventions and getting all kinds of educational certificates and accolades.

Schools from towns a hundred miles away were booking trips with them. The summer camps had waiting lists a mile long. And finally – finally – Emma had been able to work out a grant deal that allowed the kids who couldn’t afford the camp to actually attend.

To say she’d been riding a high for the last 365 days would sound like an overstatement, but it still felt deeply true.

She and Killian still had their share of problems. Killian nearly kicked her out of the house a few times (exaggeration) over her inability to put her clothes back in their closet and Emma had a few mild meltdowns over Killian not closing the shower curtain when he left the bathroom (do you want mold, Killian?!), but they were happy. Their life was successful, joyful, beautiful, and now – growing.

“How did we decide to transport the mugs, love?” Killian called from the kitchen, his Captain Hook mug in one hand and Emma’s Princess one in the other.

“Shit ton of bubble wrap, I guess?” she called back, still trying to pack away all of their photo frames without breaking anything.

She’d known when they moved into this house it was going to be a “starter home,” a place they rented until they were able to truly put down roots. She just hadn’t anticipated those roots sprouting so damn fast. But here they were, ready to upgrade from 2 bedrooms to 3, from tiny yard to acreage, from couple to family.

It all started back in spring, their grant funding having come through and Emma celebrating by visiting the local group home that would benefit from it.  It was tough seeing that many kids without homes, without support, but their enthusiasm for the coming summer was tangible. They were so excited about the freedom of the open water that they were actually interested in learningand so Emma sat down with them and started sharing some of the things they’d be covering – from the history of New England to the creatures of the ocean to how fishermen bring us home our dinner. All the kids were captivated and gathered around Emma, but two of them stood out the most for her.

Hovering near the back of the crowd and huddled together like they were riding out a storm were two young girls, enthralled in Emma’s words but seemingly afraid to come any closer.

Emma knew all too well what that felt like – without the benefit of someone to cling to.

Afterward she’d asked the director of the group home about the two of them. Ava and Anastasia had been in the group home for a few months now, their last foster home having returned them for being “too needy” and “a burden on the household.” They wouldn’t leave each other, the man explained, not after having gotten separated from their parents just before they were murdered by some kind of drug lord.

Their parents hadn’t been perfect, obviously messed up with some troubled and dangerous people, but they’d been loving parents, dedicated to giving their girls a good life, one better than they’d had. Emma could respect that desire (while simultaneously wanting to punch them for having put their children in this situation). Ava and Ana didn’t have any other family, their parents having been an orphan and a runaway themselves, and so the girls just drifted through life, seemingly unwanted.

Emma couldn’t have it.

So she went home that afternoon and told Killian about them, determined to find them someone who could help.

“We could contact CASA? With a Court Appointed Special Advocate, they’re far more likely to get adopted,” Emma offered, her fingers busily tapping away on her phone.

“Or we could do the obvious,” Killian said after a long pause.

“The obvious?” Emma had echoed, clearly needing some further cues as to what was apparently right in front of her.

“We could foster them.”

And so the next day they’d applied to be foster parents. When they indicated they were interested in fostering the girls, they began doing weekly visits with them, allowing them to gauge if it would be a good fit.

At first they were beyond shy. They hardly spoke and when they did they seemed to be afraid that what they said had been the wrong thing. Or something. But Killian and Emma just kept coming, kept telling them stories of their times on the ship, of their painful pasts, of the things they liked to do for fun on the weekends when they weren’t sailing. Bit by bit the girls started sharing more of themselves. At first everything was framed as “we.” No matter which of them spoke – usually Ava, though – it was always a collective answer. We love dogs. We have a red wooden sled. We’ve never had homemade pizza. But gradually they began to cling to one another less, to speak about something they liked individually.

Ava, it seemed, was just a little bit more like Emma. She was very physical – loved sports and adventure. Anastasia, on the other hand, was very analytical. She was good with numbers and liked to make plans. A lot like Killian.

Every week’s visit proved more and more that they could do this. They could be foster parents to these 8 and 10 year old girls.

And so, just as summer was beginning, the girls gathered their black trash bags full of what belongings they’d kept and they stood outside the group home waiting for Killian and Emma. When they arrived, Emma promptly opened the trunk of the car and pulled two different sets of luggage – purple for Ava and pink for Anastasia – and insisted they transfer their things, leaving behind that black garbage bag forever.

“But Emma, I might need it again,” Anastasia mumbled, hesitating to pick up her new luggage.

“Sweetheart, this is yours now. No matter where you go, you’ll take this with you. The things you own are yours and they’re absolutely not trash. Your stuff matters and you matter.

Ana was quiet, playing with the blue drawstrings on the garbage bag and scraping her feet against the sidewalk. “I don’t want to have to go anywhere again,” she finally said.

“And we’re hoping you won’t have to,” Killian added from behind her, his arms full of Ava’s things as she packed them into her new suitcase.

It was certainly an adjustment having two more people in the house. Dinners were a total fiasco, some days, Killian still trying to figure out portions and who liked what. Emma decided they should invest in a dishwasher, a convenience they didn’t think they should splurge on when it was just the two of them. But now the dishes would pile up like crazy and it just wasn’t worth all the effort to hand wash several days’ worth at a time. So they caved.

They bought a lot of things that summer. A swing set for their small back yard. The cutest bunkbed set you’d ever seen (yes, it was shaped like a ship and yes, they were that cliché).

Ava and Ana loved their room, decorating it in every color you could imagine with pictures of animals and boats and pop singers all over. They were still fairly shy and at times uncertain of their place in the home, but they continued to open up every day they spent in the Swan/Jones household.

Their friends had all been so supportive. Robin and Regina often came over to visit, bringing pizza and video games with them. Belle would, predictably, bring them books, but she also offered to take them for rides in her police car (at first, that had upset them – the last time they’d seen police vehicles was their parents’ death. But Belle was determined to show them the good side of it all, and it seemed she’d won them over). Even Will enjoyed their company, his own humor leaning toward the immature side giving him a little boost in conversation. And Ruby – she would Skype them and talk about Seattle and beg them all to come and visit (you know, after Killian and Emma were removed from the no-fly list).

No one was happier than Mary Margaret and David. Constantly exhausted with their infant, they loved spending time with kids who actually spoke and the two of them would “babysit” often when both Killian and Emma were needed on their ships.

Mostly they’d started taking turns leading the groups, insistent that the girls be with them as often as possible. So much so that the girls actually participated in every single age-appropriate excursion they offered. At first they’d been part of the learning groups, completing the activities with the “class,” but eventually they graduated to being Killian and Emma’s little helpers, aiding the other students as they learned.

It had been simply amazing to watch them blossom like that, all in the span of a few months.

“Can you believe this is our life now?” Emma had whispered one night, tucked away in their bed in the wee hours of the morning.

“Aye, I can. I think it’s what I’ve always wanted, love. If you can believe that.”

“Yeah, me too.”

They asked the girls if they could adopt them on a Sunday. Killian had made sure his ship wasn’t booked for anything that day, and they’d gone sailing on a purely non-work adventure, Emma and him showing Ava how to steer and Anastasia how to tie knots. Once they’d found a good, calm spot of open ocean, Killian had dropped anchor and sat the girls down, Emma nervously clinging to his arm.

“We were wondering…” Killian began, looking back and forth between the now even-more-nervous-than-Emma children.

“We want to adopt you!” Emma shouted, unable to allow that fearful look in her girls’ eyes any longer.

(She knew the feeling of waiting for someone to tell you they were sending you back. Doing it nicely or not – it didn’t really matter to a lost girl. It hurt all the same. And bracing for it was a pain all its own.)

“Yes!” Ava screamed, jumping up and into Emma’s arms. The two of them were giggling and hugging and purely ecstatic – until they realized that Anastasia hadn’t said a word.

“Ana, sweetheart, is that OK? Do you want us to be your home?” Killian asked, kneeling in front of the still-shocked, scared kid.

“But… are you sure? What if you leave us?”

“They’re not leaving, Ana! Stop being such a baby,” Ava snapped.

“Mom and dad weren’t going to leave us either!” Anastasia returned, her face flushed and her arms shaking.

It wasn’t like them to fight and it had nearly broken Emma to watch, but emotions came out in odd ways. It had to play out as it would.

“They never promised that, you know. But Emma and Killian promised. And they don’t break promises. Right?” Ava looked to Killian, her eyes boring into his.

“Never.”

Damn, what a difference a couple years could make.

-

Paperwork.

Paperwork was the fucking worst.

Killian’s hand was cramped from all the forms, the signing, the checklists, the mortgages and loans and adoption papers and marriage licenses.

Yep, marriage licenses. You’d think a committed couple who owned a successful business together could adopt a couple of kids with no trouble, but, you know, you’d be wrong. They wanted proof of all kinds of things, including “stability.” Which apparently meant married.

So he’d been robbed of the grand proposal he’d always envisioned, settling instead for an exasperated, “well I guess we’ll get married then,” in the uncomfortable chairs at the lawyer’s office.

“How romantic,” Emma had grumbled, making Killian feel even worse about himself than he already did. But, in the end, they knew it didn’t matter. They were going to be together always, were already partners and were now going to be a team – them and their girls (and hopefully a dog, once they moved into the bigger house).

They decided on a courthouse wedding, planning it for three days later (they had to get the blasted paperwork in order). Telling their friends hadn’t been a fun task – the men’s horror at a lack of bachelor party quite comical – but they were supportive in the end (of course).

So supportive, in fact, that they all showed up. To the least impressive wedding in all of time and space.

And he meant all of them showed up. When Emma and Killian and Ava and Anastasia opened the courthouse doors and started walking down the marble hallway, they were greeted by Mary Margaret, David, baby Leo, Regina, Belle, Will, Robin, Ruby, and Whale – all leaned against the wall as there simply wasn’t enough seating in such a small space.

The magistrate led them to a tiny room, certainly not suited for 14 people, and proceeded to marry the leather-clad couple in a 5-minute ceremony that culminated in a quick kiss on the lips and a giant family group hug that the magistrate remarked was the oddest thing he’d yet seen at one of these proceedings.

(Odd was kind of their thing, Killian had thought.)

Rings exchanged and house bought, the big old friends-turned-family began the grueling process of lugging all of their shit from one place to the next, Emma and Killian finally finding their permanent home (you know, the literal, physical kind. Metaphorically they’d obviously found that long ago in one another – and now in Anastasia and Ava).

Emma had been cranky as all hell. Moving was awful, he, of course, agreed, but Emma was simply not having it.

“Emma, where do you think we should put the linens?”

“Ugh, I don’t care!” She’d snapped in return, slumping against the bookshelf she was currently emptying.

“Come on, Em! I know it’s awful, but we’re going to have a yard!” Ava called, proudly dragging around her suitcase, despite the fact they wouldn’t be leaving officially until the next day.

“And a dog! Don’t forget the dog,” Anastasia added, her nose still firmly planted in the latest Hardy Boys book Belle had brought over.

“Of course,” Emma had chuckled, reaching out for Ava and pulling her into a bear hug. “Can’t forget that.”

The next morning was an absolute mess. Really, he’d assumed that more help meant fewer problems, but it was seeming that the opposite was true. Too many people had too many different organizational strategies and opinions and attitudes and complaints and was it actually possible to hate your own belongings this much?

But they’d survived it. All their crap made it to the new house – the anchor-clad pillows and afghans only having fallen in a smallmud puddle on the way – and the family was what you would call pooped.

“Can we clear off the couch and watch a movie, Killy?” Killian grinned at Ava’s new nickname for him, but his face fell when he realized he couldn’t actually tell her yes.

“I’ve no clue where the DVD player is, love. And we don’t have wi-fi yet, so no Netflix.”

“I could read us a book!” Ana offered, Ava groaning (comically).

“Or Killy could tell us a story,” Emma said, her eyes alight with warmth and glee, despite her exhaustion. She leaned into him and he gave her a tight squeeze, reveling in their new life.

“Once upon a time there lived a pirate who worked on Wall Street,” he began, his girls all working together to clear off the couch for them to pile onto it.

“What’s Wall Street?” Anastasia interjected, tossing a box of Emma’s old files into the corner.

“Oh, a terrible place full of greedy people.”

“Killian, don’t vilify finance for them already. Anastasia might turn out to be a hell of a broker someday.”

“Swan, language,” Killian gasped, earning chuckles from his girls.

The four of them plopped onto the couch, Anastasia curling into Emma and Ava sitting directly on Killian lap, Emma intertwining her fingers with Killian’s as he continued his story. “The pirate had all the treasure in the world, but then he lost a great love, and he thought his life was going to be empty forever.”

“But it’s not, right?” Ana nervously interjected (always the interrupter, his little girl).

“Don’t worry, my love, this story has the happiest of happy endings.”

When the story was finished and the yawning had overtaken the talking, Killian and Emma led the girls to their very own bedrooms. Not much was set up in each, of course, but their beds were made and for the first time in their lives, these girls had their own spaces.

Killian and Emma had provided that for them and the swell of pride and love in his heart at that thought was something he’d never felt before. When he’d fallen in love with his feisty, beautiful, headstrong neighbor, he’d thought his heart could never have been fuller – not after she’d confessed she loved him, too. But now – now it’s like his insides had gotten bigger to make room for more feelings he’d never dreamed he’d have.

It took longer than he hoped for them to simply find the pajama boxes and set up the toiletries, but within the hour, the girls were all ready for bed, Emma and Killian each taking turns tucking them in.

“But I’ve never slept alone,” Ava whispered, clutching a pillow. “Ana’s always been with me. I could always call her name and she’d answer me and I’d know we were going to be OK.”

“Oh, my little love. She’s not far,” Killian soothed, a perfect remedy popping into mind.

How appropriate this should come full circle, he thought.

“You know, Emma and I used to live apart. And we didn’t like being alone either.”

“I know. You were neighbors, though, so you weren’t far away.”

“Exactly. And now so are you and your sister. She’s just through this wall, you know,” Killian said, his hand resting on the wall behind Ava’s head. “And she’s probably feeling scared and sad just like you. So you can reach back just like this and give the wall a little knock, knock, letting Ana know you’re here.”

“Like this, Killy?” Ava balled her fist and hesitantly tapped her knuckles against the wall.

He couldn’t hear any conversation or movement from the other side – their house had properly insulated walls and all – but the return knock, knock came quickly.

“See? Ana’s OK, over there with Emma. And you’re OK. We’re all together now and always will be.”

“We’re a little pirate family?” Ava questioned, the hope in her eyes making his heart swell just that much more.

“Aye, love. A perfect little pirate family.”

Thank you for reading <3

[twdgfanfiction]

Chapter 7 - Difficult Decisions

"I know Charleston isn't that big right now, but we all work together to make sure everything runs smoothly." David listened as Stephen droned on about their community, though the man had been speaking for quite a while, he didn't really absorbed what was being said to him. Rather, it just went through one ear and out the other, unable to focus as his mind was running on other things at that moment.

Mostly, he wondered if Mariana was safe and sound with the others back near the tower, even though the place seemed secure enough and they didn't seem dangerous, he couldn't help but be afraid something could happen to her while he was away. However, the more he thought about the young child, the truth between them tasted more bitter and bitter at the back of his tongue.

He knew Mari was scared of him, that she just needed time and she would hopefully understand his actions or at least talk to him instead of bottling up her feelings. Everytime he'd tried to fix things with anyone in the past he somehow ended up making the situation even worse so giving the little girl some space would be good, but remembering the way she had been acting since that moment back at the road and that look he had never expected to see in his daughter's eyes made his chest constrict painfully

Glancing behind his shoulder he realized that they were already on the outskirts on the community, the tower stood tall in the distance while the small group came to a stop at the wall. Ava stood by him, listening intently to what the second in command was explaining to them.

"So, what're we gonna be doing?" She asked, looking up at the towering wall as she added. "You said we were gonna be put in the guard, right?"

"That I did! Glad to see that someone is actually listening." The last sentence was clearly more shot at David than Ava, Stephen knowing that the other man wasn't giving his explanations his full attention. Glaring at the man with a frown, David held back a reply and just stood there, focusing on what the leader was saying as he explained to the both of them. "Considering you both were in the army, I think your experiences in the battlefield will be useful for the scouts. I wanna see how you guys lead the group and how well you can defend yourselves."

"What's the plan, then?" David spoke up, finding himself less and less eager to leave the safety of the walls after having found the community only a few hours ago. Stephen seemed to have noticed this apprehensiveness to leave the protection of Charleston, and with a deep chuckle rising from his chest, he gestured with a flick of his head for the two to follow him. They obeyed quietly, listening intently as he continued explaining what was going on.

"Alexis' group will be leaving in the morning to continue scavenging. You guys will be working with her, and she'll be reporting back to me with how well you guys did, so I'd stay on her good side." He pointed out, pausing by the towering wall as the three of them fell silent. Listening carefully, David could hear the groans of the undead as they walked along the perimeter of the community, some of the walkers banging weakly against the wall in a vain attempt to get past their protection and get inside.

Backing from the wall, both David and Ava shared a nervous look at the thought of going out there tomorrow. Neither of them were eager to come face to face with walkers again, especially if they also had to lead and look after an entire group. Still, they all had to work together to keep the community going, and David didn't feel right if he just sat around doing nothing while other people risked their lives for supplies. The sounds caused Micah to whimper in Stephen's arms, the grown man comforted the infant as he too moved away from the walls, rather walking down one of the streets with the other adults following close behind him.

Sparing one last glance at the wall, David turned when Ava asked. "So, how'd you guys come across this place? It's a pretty awesome setup."

"When the lurkers started appearing, I was on duty with my partner here. I've lived in Charleston all my life… knew a lot of good people that didn't make it, including close friends." Stephen paused for a minute, the grief and freshly inflicted wounds hurting him worse than the others could possibly imagine. David sympathised with him, recalling how hard it was for him to handle both his parents dying on the same night. If he'd just kept his eyes on the road… but that wasn't the time for pitying himself.

Rather, he listened with a knowing frown as the leader continued. "Everyone that made it barricaded themselves in the tower. Those first few days were the worst for the community. People were bitten, broken or just couldn't go on. Those that survived were lost. No one to lead. So I decided to stand up, became second in command to Maria after she made it her mission to help the people here."

"It looks like you've done a good job. People seem pretty happy to be here." David pointed out, noticing some people walking around in the warm glow of the sun shining high above them. Stephen nodded in agreement, watching the same people as the others realised they were guards on patrol, the rifles in their hands the first thing that David and Ava fixated on. After a few moments of silence, Stephen gestured for them to walk, going down one of the streets that run adjacent to the wall.

Some parts of the wall were quiet, none of the walkers slamming their decayed hands to try and break it down, and it was appreciated by all of them, especially Micah as the infant no longer whimpered in fear of the monsters trying to get them. David glanced down at the innocent face, wondering if they were able to hold onto that innocence when he would grow. If the walkers could be defeated, it would no doubt take a long time with the military in ruins around them. They were in a war, and he hoped that he could get through it without losing those important to him, that someday he could reunite with the rest of his family.

By his side, he listened as Ava asked the leader. "What're we gonna be doing today, then? Before you send us back out there tomorrow."

"Today is just showing you guys the guard routes. Typically, you'll be going along the wall, and checking if there's any faults that need fixing. It's important that both of you stay vigilant, otherwise the whole wall could come down, and we don't wanna deal with a breach that size right now." Stephen explained, looking at the wall for any of those faults while he talked to them. When he spotted none, he paused, turning back to face the other adults with him before adding. "I ain't gonna lie to you guys, but we're running a bit low on our luck right now. We made a deal around a few weeks back with other communities nearby, but with it getting colder and winter starting to come, people are storing their food to help themselves. Can't say we're not thinking of doing that for ourselves."

"Do we have enough food to do that?" Ava asked, somewhat concerned for the future of their community with what Stephen was telling them. David agreed with her concern, wondering if this was the best thing for them.

He didn't answer to that, rather staring straight ahead as they noticed arms reaching through the barred gate near the river. Stephen turned to Ava, silently handing Micah over to her before pulling a knife from its sheath on his belt, making his way over with them close by as David noticed that it was a walker. Weak growls came from it, the blanks eyes and gnashing teeth pressed up against the gate as the metal creaked, the obstacle between living and dead holding up for now. Stephen took no chances, and his knife slipped through the bars of the gate easily, piercing the front of the walker's face and into its brain, killing it instantly before he pulled the blade free.

The squelching sound of flesh being stabbed turned David's stomach, and his appetite was fading faster when he saw the body collapse into a heap. Still staring at it, he noticed Stephen place the knife back into his belt while explaining to them. "This is the only way in and out of Charleston, for now. We gotta keep it clear of dead for the scouts."

"We'd best get a more stable entrance done, soon." David suggested, looking over at Stephen as Ava walked to his side, holding Micah close to her protectively. The other man nodded at that, taking his child from the woman and smiling down at Micah, his son cooing affectionately when his father's face came into view again.

Slowly, he turned around and started walking away, finishing the conversation there with a sharp order. "Come on, we should get back if we wanna get fed."

Ava and David glanced at each other, the shorter of the two looking over her shoulder at the gate before they followed after the second in command. The tower was not far from where they were now, the imposing building blocking the sun behind it and casting the group into shadows that cooled them in the summer heat, the wind blowing over the river hitting David full force and providing comfort to his exposed skin. He was glad winter wasn't close yet, with the harsh cold, low on supplies and so many people in the community, he wasn't sure how things could possibly turn out. At least they wouldn't be alone in a car in the middle of who knows where. The air seemed to leave his lungs as he couldn't help but think about the same situation happening to his family, especially Gabe, he hoped the young boy was well and safe under Kate and Javi's care.

Stephen paused at the doors leading into the tower, glancing to the left when they noticed someone making their way towards them. David followed his gaze, spotting that it was in fact Maria, the worried and agitated expression on her face causing his stomach to twist while he closed the distance between them.

As she stopped, the leader wasted no time as she confessed. "I'm glad I found you guys. Something's happened, I swear I was gone for only a few minutes, I-I thought she would be fine by herself but-"

"But what? What happened?" David interrupted, the agony in his gut worsening when Maria just stared up at him with panic and guilt clear in her eyes.

"It's Mariana." She started, backing away slightly as David's face fell at the mention of his daughter. "I don't know where she is. I'm so sorry, David, I told her to stay put over there with the flowers while I dealt with something. When I came back, she was… gone."

"You left her alone?!" David snapped harshly, his voice a loud, deep growl that caused Maria to take a step back. Ava moved to hold his arm, keeping him back while Stephen moved between them defensively, the loud voices frightening Micah as the baby began to cry. David ignored his piercing cries, only able to focus on his only family left as he demanded answers. "Where?! Where did you leave her?!"

"By the flowerbeds near the river. I'm sorry, Alexis came with something important, I couldn't just ignore it!" Maria excused, leading the group to where she last had Mariana. David rushed past her, spotting the flowerbeds near the riverbank that Maria spoke off, but when he stopped near them, he could see that Mariana was nowhere to be seen. Ava stopped next to him, the worry and fear clear in her voice as she muttered to her friend.

"This ain't good. Where could she be?" She wondered, moving away from the group as she called out loudly. "Kid, where are you?! Come on, this isn't a game!"

"Mariana! Mariana, where are you?!" He called out desperately, glancing around the open space as the river rushed loudly in the background. The possibilities that could have happened ran through his mind, the river, the walls keeping the walkers out, it only caused his heart to pound strongly in his chest with fear while he searched tirelessly for his daughter.

Ava was by his side, helping him look for the young girl, voices calling out before he noticed his friend pausing in her step. Copying her, he looked in the direction she was staring at and noticed Mariana slowly peeking out from one of the buildings, coming out fully when she recognized the voices calling for her.

His feet moved on their own. Rushing over to her, he embraced his child tightly in fear that he would lose her again if he let go. After a few minutes of allowing his heart to slow down, he finally moved away from her and asked, angered yet relieved that he found her again. "What were you doing in there?"

"I…" She paused, looking over David's shoulder at Maria and the others before she continued. "I heard the muertos by the wall over there. I was alone so I got scared and hid here… I'm sorry."

"It's alright, kid. The main thing here is that you're safe." Ava pointed out, giving her a soft smile and moving to David's side as she allowed Mariana to hold her hand. Slowly, the grown man stood up, turning to his friend as she suggested to both of them. "Come on, let's go and grab something to eat."

"We'll give you guys some space." Stephen revealed, walking away with Maria after sending her a stern look, silently urging her with a flick of his head to follow him and avoid David snapping at

her again for losing his daughter.

"I'm sorry." He heard Maria mutter as she turned around and followed the second in command, clearly embarrassed about what happened. But he didn't regret his anger that time. Mariana was entrusted to Maria, and she lost the child on her first time. If that happened, he didn't know if she could be trusted with Mari again.

With the fright of nearly losing the young girl, and with the sun starting to set behind the horizon of buildings along the other side of the river, David could feel that familiar pange of hunger eating away at his innards. Mariana just walked beside him and Ava, holding tightly onto the grown woman's hand as she stared straight ahead in silence. A few glances were thrown her way by him, wondering what was going on in her mind, and whether if she was telling the truth about why she hid. He pushed that taught out of his head. Mariana had no reason to lie to him, she always told him the truth before, given that Gabe was usually the one spinning tales to get out of trouble or his chores. He was almost like Javier in that sense.

Softly, he heard the young girl whisper to him. "Dad, I'm scared."

"It's alright, mija. The muertos can't get to you in here." He consoled, looking down to see that Mariana had moved her gaze from straight ahead of them to stare at his face, trying to comfort herself with his warm smile.

But she couldn't. With a heavy frown, she turned away and revealed to them. "It's not the muertos I'm scared of. I heard Maria talk about a bad man. She said his name was Carver."

"You overheard Maria?" David questioned, recalling Maria saying that she had to have an important to discuss with Alexis just before. Mariana knew what they were talking about, and the realisation of what she did caused David to frown slightly as he scolded. "You were eavesdropping on them, weren't you?"

"No!" She denied, though the way she was unable to meet David's eyes anymore, and the look of uncertainty on her face said all that he needed to know as he stared down at her, listening as she finally confessed in a meek voice. "Yes. I'm sorry…"

"Look, maybe it was rude for her to spy on Maria and that, but maybe she got us some useful information. You think those guys would tell us that about this Carver?" Ava pointed out, annoying David by refusing to take his side again. Her kind words seemed to have had a positive effect on the young girl, however, Mari smiling at her as the grown woman returned the smile, quickly glancing over at the approaching tower before asking Mariana. "So, do you know who this Carver is?"

"Maria said he's being mean. Something about the food they're giving to each other, he's being greedy. He sounds pretty scary." She confessed, sounding scared when talking about the mysterious man. The mention of food caused Ava and David to glance at each other with concern in their eyes, neither of them physically mentioning anything before the young girl in their care asked them softly. "Are we safe? I like it here, I don't wanna leave."

"Don't worry. We'll sort this out." David comforted, holding Mariana's other hand while she nodded in response, appearing calmer with her father's words consoling her. However, when he looked up at Ava, he could see none of that calmness in her face, rather she was concerned, almost afraid, for their new home. Honestly, he felt the same way.

Soon after their conversation, they reached the doors leading into the tower, and a young girl standing there caught David's eye as he raised an eyebrow in confusion. Mariana, however, seemed to recognise the child as they ran towards the group, a goofy grin on her face while she gleefully welcomed Mari. "Mariana, I was looking everywhere for you!"

"Hi, Grace." Mariana replied softly, happy to see the other child while David just stood there, watching the two interact with a soft smile on her face. It was nice to see Mariana making friends in Charleston, and this Grace seemed like a friendly enough child with her smile and carefree personality. In his mind, it would be good that his daughter had friends that didn't worry about what was happening just outside their walls. This was the chance for her to be the child he wanted her to be, rather than growing up to care about nothing but survival.

"Mariana's dad?" He heard Grace asked slowly, noticing that she was almost wary around him as she continued to ask, her shoe scuffing against the solid concrete of the pavement. "Is it alright if Mariana comes and has dinner with me and my mom?"

He didn't really like the thought of Mariana being separated from him after just going through that heart attack looking for her, but before he could answer, he heard Ava whisper to him from his side. "David. We can go and find Maria and Stephen while she's with Grace and her mom. Let her go and enjoy some time with her friend."

"Please, dad?" Mariana begged, eager to go and spend some time with someone her own age. With a heavy sigh, he nodded in response, causing Grace and Mariana to smile brightly as the latter continued. "Thanks, dad! Let's go, Grace!"

With that, the two ran into the tower to meet up with the older girl's mother. David and Ava stood there, watching as Mariana and Grace disappeared from their sights before the former sighed in frustration, focusing on what his daughter told them before. If there was someone that was trying to wrestle in on their supplies, it did not bode well for their view on Charleston. In the back of his mind, he wondered if this place was as safe as he forced himself to believe. At least on the road, he knew who his enemies were, and only had to look out for himself and his family, but this was something else. There were so many people here that depended on Maria and Stephen, and he worried if they were able to stand up to the plate of being a leader.

Stephen might have been able to. Practical and unafraid to do what needs to be done, he had the right kind of attitude to protect the people, but Maria seemed too much of a pushover for his liking. Either way, he wouldn't know until he actually found them. Ava was the first to start walking, keeping her voice low as the two of them entered the tower. "We find Maria and Stephen, then what? I don't like the idea of starting shit over some asshole."

"I dunno. First things first, we see what's going on here. If we wanna make this work long-term, we gotta be kept in the loop, otherwise I don't know how long I'm willing to stay here." David confessed, glancing at the unsuspecting people continuing their daily tasks before settling down for dinner. "I don't know what'll happen if this whole thing blows in our face. It was easier when it was just us on the road, at least there all we had to worry about was the muertos."

"Yeah, and no one had our backs when things went south. Trust me, David, being with other people is better than doing this shit alone." Ava insisted, her feelings on the matter clear. David didn't argue, rather he remained silent while they looked around the crowds of people gathering for their food, spotting Jordan at the door leading to the storage. With another survivor they didn't recognize, he was giving out rations to the people as they lined up, those getting their food leaving to eat it elsewhere. With other important matters to attend to, they left Jordan to his work and continued their search.

Maria and Stephen were nowhere to be seen. Confused, David glanced around the numerous faces around them as he wondered. "Maybe they gone to the top floor?"

"Maybe, let's go." Ava replied, making her way over to the staircase while David followed after her. Neither of them wanting to waste time, they jogged up the flights of stairs, taking two at a time, and trying to avoid running into the people that were making their way downstairs towards the storage. Eventually, slightly out of breath, they reached the top floor leading into the makeshift chapel.

David paused at the double doors, opening it slightly as he listened into the room with Ava by his side, the both of them silent as they listened to Maria and Stephen discussing something with hushed voices, a third voice joining in that they recognized to be Alexis'. With a deep frown, he looked over at Ava and noticed her appearing just as unnerved as he was, before he took in a deep breath and opened the door fully. The action didn't go unnoticed by those that were inside the room, Maria staring at them from her chair at the front of the room while Stephen stood off to her side. Walking down the aisle, David's frown deepened as Maria asked him with confusion clear in her voice and face.

"David?" She started, raising an eyebrow as the two stopped at the end of the aisle. "What're you going here? I thought you'd be enjoying dinner round about now."

"We know about Carver, Maria." David revealed, his suspicions worsening when the truth caused the woman's face to fall in shock, eyes drifting from him to Stephen as she silently stared at him, both leaders sharing a look before the soldier continued his questioning. "What's going on with him? Who is this Carver?"

"How'd you find out about that?" Stephen stepped in, eyeing the two up with an angered glare before he looked over at Alexis. "Alexis?"

"Hey, don't look that me. I didn't say shit to them since I brought them here." She defended herself, annoyed that Stephen would accuse her like that. David, unwilling to let them know that Mariana had spied on their private conversations, just crossed his arms as he changed the conversation.

"It doesn't matter how we found out. Who is Carver?" He pressed, noticing Ava staring heavily at the two while waiting for their questions to be answered. Alexis, with Micah in her arms, sighed heavily as she glanced over at her superiors, shrugging while trying to keep the infant calm enough to avoid him crying out for his father.

"Carver's the leader of this community south east of here. Howe's. Some mall they took over down in North Carolina. We had a deal with him, trade the stuff they need for the stuff we need, and everyone was gonna be happy with it. Problem is, he's a greedy bastard and wants more than what was agreed, what we can give him." She explained, looking over at David and Ava with a concerned frown, adding in a quiet voice. "We're in deep shit if we don't do something fast."

"That's why I say we cut the deal off." Stephen interjected, glancing over at Maria and interrupting her before she could argue. "If we had your way, we'd be out of supplies and starving to death in the next two weeks! I ain't letting my people suffer because of an asshole who got too big for his boots."

"Maria, why are we even arguing on this?! You agreed with me before, you know what we have to do to survive!" Alexis revealed, confused as to why their leader was going back on her word. Maria looked over to her, eyebrows furrowed in frustration as she was finally given a chance to put her views across.

"Because I know what William Carver is like! You're not the one who has to do meeting with him, Alexis, he is a cruel man who doesn't care about other people! I'm terrified of how Charleston will be affected if we cut things off with him." She snapped, clearly at the end of her rope. The harsh bite in her words caused Alexis to raise her eyebrows in surprise, caught off guard with the other woman's outburst as her face fell in sympathy. David watched the exchange with his hardened features softening, feeling a pange of empathy for Maria and the harsh reality of being a leader.

"Sometimes you gotta face your fears, Maria." He explained, watching as her gaze fell to the floor and her shoulders sagged with the weight collapsing on top of her. "If we don't stand up to him, Carver will think he can take everything he wants from us."

"Anything has to be better than dealing with this guy, right?" Ava joined in, moving to the chair beside her and sat down. David remained standing, looking at the different expressions on the survivors' faces, all of them thinking about what they were talking about. Stephen and Alexis nodded in agreement, yet their words seemed to only make Maria despair more over the inevitable confrontation with the other community's leader. It had to be done, otherwise they would end up with no supplies and starve to death in the upcoming winter.

Softly, she sighed to herself and rubbed her face with both of her hands, trying to calm her frayed nerves before she finally conceded. "I can't go against what so many people want. Alright, I'll go down to Howe's next supply run and we'll talk to Carver there. God, I hope this doesn't come and bite us in the ass."

"This is what's best for us, Maria. I know it." Stephen pressed, moving to her side as a large hand clasped around her shoulder, a strained smile all he can give her before both of them frowned once more. It must have been tiring, David thought, to keep all these people safe and fed. Hopefully, he could help make their struggles that little bit easier to bear, but for now, he was starving and wanted nothing more than to have dinner and settle down for the night, noticing the sun set even more behind them, the skies darkening to the deep blue.

"We can go with you, Maria." Ava offered, pausing when everyone looked over at her in surprise, including David, though she continued her offer after a few stressful moments of silence. "When you go to Howe's. You don't have to do this alone."

"That's… That's generous of you, Ava. I'd appreciate it." Maria replied gratefully, a genuine smile tugging at the corners of her lips while Ava returned the gesture, nodding before she stood up once more. Moving to David's side, the both of them listened as their leader suggested in a more gentle tone. "Why don't you two go and eat? We can take again later."

"Yeah, come on. I'm starving." Ava agreed, directing those words to David as she gestured for him to follow her. Walking down the aisle towards the double doors again, he remained quiet with a knowing expression on his face, unable to shake the slippery feeling wiggling around at the back of his mind. Maria was right to be afraid. There was no way they would be able to know what would happen in the future with this Carver, and the incoming winter was almost all he could think of while fear gripped him tightly. Unable to shake himself completely free of it, he rather forced himself to listen to Ava.

Letting the doors close behind them, the shorter survivor paused, hands on hips as she turned her head to David and mumbled. "Jesus. What're we getting ourselves into?"

"Whatever happens, we gotta see this through. Help Charleston through this." David pointed out, walking past her as he made his way down the staircase, the other following after him as he finished with a tired whisper. "We can't run away from this."

[loseitall-ff]

5.

“Big Boy in the neighbourhood, alright ladies we have Chris Brown in the building. What’s good my brother” I chuckled “what’s good family” rubbing the top of my head, it’s so damn early for me “I’m glad you made it, I thought you wasn’t about to come. What time you call this? Your eyes half closed, he is half dressed. I am joking, he is dressed. I can assure you ladies but what happened?” licking my top lip laughing “uhm, I overslept. I don’t know” I shrugged “overslept? Do you even sleep? Don’t give me that bull” he always catches me out, shaking my head lightly “aight, I kind of forgot. Don’t get me wrong, I love coming here. I have had so much happening and my manager called and was like you know you got an interview and I was like huh? Where and he goes Big Boy. My eyes shot open and I came running” Big Boy side eyed “mhmmmm, we got playboy breezy in the building. We going to be back after this break” I am still half asleep, I mean I haven’t slept but I did other things. Big Boy cut to a song “my bad family, I wouldn’t do you like that” getting my hand out “I know, I know you would never do me like that. You want anything?” he shook my hand “uhm, water please” I guess I will be able to sleep after this.

Drinking the water as we came back from the song “now we have Chris Brown here, he is awake. I have watered him and he is smiling for me” placing the water down “so Chris, it’s been years. It has been years since you have entered my show, now I feel a little hurt but I know that you also kept a low profile too, but not as low as you think. You released an album, well a few but no interviews at all. When I asked for you, I thought you would have rejected” let me word this right “I just didn’t want to do interviews, I wanted my music to speak for itself. I just really wanted to concentrate on me as a person” sounds lame “which is understandable Chris, I see you are doing well but from the outside looking in you are still the same Chris” Big Boy wouldn’t sugar-coat shit so I’m ready for this “I don’t care though, I honestly just thought forget it. I love my fans and I do it for them, I don’t think my music should be based on how I act in an interview so that is the reason why I stopped. My personal life has affected my music, it would be the thing of if I am with Rihanna everyone loves me, when I am not I am the most hated person. I am just done with that” Big Boy’ eyes widened as he sat back.

“Are you done with that?” he eyed me up “I am done with people judging me yes” Big Boy chuckled “you know what I am talking about, don’t play stupid. Ok, so correct me if I am wrong please. So these are the rumours” he lifted a paper up “you messed up” he slowly put the paper down, a stupid smile played on my face “is that?” I said “yes, that is all I read. I was rooting for you, we was all rooting for you” busting out laughing “come on now, you can tell Big Boy. Did you mess it up” clearing my throat smiling still, licking my lips “to clear up rumours, I don’t want to go into detail. Yes it was my fault, now I don’t admit fault for many things but this, it was me. Things escalated and it didn’t stop” I mumbled “it said you already had Ava lined up, you tell us was that the case?” this is why I hate interviews, this is like the first one since having Liana and since the breakup “that wasn’t the case, this is how it went down. I did know Ava and things happen, I don’t really wish to say anything but I never had Ava lined up” I said in annoyance “I can see home girl with you now, y’all an item then?” shaking my head “nah” rubbing my face “no?” Big Boy repeated “no, I am not in any relationship, I am single. Ava is just there” sounds a little mean actually.

Big Boy went silent “so I woke up and came to work, read a story on TMZ. I had peers with me, they was all cheering you on calling you that nigga. Billboard awards, pictures of Ava entering your home, Rihanna leaving your home. What happened?” that was the whole reason Robyn ran to Barbados, I don’t know how that leaked out. Blowing out air “erm” rubbing my chest laughing “now you are the only guy that I know that could pull such a move off, man. This is Rihanna” chewing my bottom lip “things happen” throwing my arms in the air “things like that do not just happen, come on” I don’t want to say too much, sighing “aight, so uhm. Robyn came to the crib, she stayed the night in a different room. She was drunk and no matter what she is my shawty and I will look after her, she called me up and didn’t want to be home alone. That is it” Big boy squinted his eyes at me “I don’t believe that, mr save his ex-girlfriend from a situation” Big Boy snorted laughing, why does nobody believe me about this shit.

It’s straight up bullshit that people are saying that I had Ava lined, I wouldn’t ever do that to Robyn “ok so let’s change the subject, we have just been speaking about this. Liana Brown, she is a mini you! I actually met her, she was with Rihanna backstage at an event. I don’t if it was my ugliness but she didn’t wish to speak to me but from afar she was playing havoc with Rihanna, I swear I saw her kick Jay Z but maybe they was play fighting but she is a cutie” grinning from ear to ear “thank you, Liana is so bright for her age. She tells me off” I miss my daughter “do you and Rihanna share custody? I know you both went court, I see you both still together for her” I sighed “I don’t really get to see Liana as much as I would like too, I mean I see her. Rihanna is there when I do, if she does stay then Liana has to stay with my mom. I can honestly say I have never had Liana for a full twenty four hours and I am not the type to sound bitter but that is never enough for a father. I am a bad guy, I have done shit and made some shit decisions but my daughter, now I will do anything for her. I want to be the man in her life, her first love, her hero. I know when she is older she will see and hear the shit I done but will turn around and say but he was good to me, I am not that guy to shy away from how I feel. I couldn’t have asked for a better baby momma, Rihanna is always one hundred with me, she tells me about things, calls me if needs be. They in Barbados right now, I miss my daughter” I ranted on “that is what I love about you, you never shy away from telling the truth. It is just because I couldn’t help when I was rooting for you when you was with Rihanna” shaking my head laughing, he won’t drop that at all.

Walking out of the radio station, opening the SUV door “get in” allowing Ava to get in first, I am about to just go to sleep when I get home. Getting in the back after her “you going home?” I asked “if you want me too? Seems like you do?” nodding my head in silence “you know what he said in there? Did you have me in line? We met as friends” looking out of the car window “this ain’t no love story, we met in a studio. Come on Ava, don’t make me say things that will upset you, you will be straight back after getting upset with me” she does it to herself “you took my number that night, you was with Rihanna then. You had my number, you called me while you was happy” I don’t get what she is trying to say “and then I fucked you out of spite” turning my head to look at her “your point is?” she need to explain to me what she is on about “but Rihanna said she never cheated, seems like you always wanted to fuck me, I mean you didn’t really need to have sex with me but you did. Everyone saw the video and Rihanna really didn’t do anything” taking in a deep breath “this is why girls like you need to be switched up, don’t speak on shit you don’t know about” side eyeing her “but you haven’t switched me up?” who gave this girl a voice “you right, you don’t have a place, not when your the same girl that watched me fuck another girl in front of you. I don’t respect you like that, you won’t be on that level as Rihanna. You’re here because I want you here”  I done warned her about that shit “you’re fucking vile Chris, not even a daughter will make you respect women” mean mugging Ava “don’t fucking speak about my daughter!” Ava mean mugged me back “Rihanna is clever to keep her away from you” hitting the front seat “get this bitch out of the car now!” before I do something stupid, Big D stopped the car abruptly “get out now” she huffed hearing her shuffle away.

Sitting on the side of the pool with my legs dangling in the water, the sun rays shining down on me. Oh this is the life, so perfect. Smiling lightly, so free “mommy!” Liana shouted, letting out a sigh but I am not child free. Turning my head, taking my shades off “yes baby” I love my daughter’ bikini, a stupid smile played on my face remembering when me and Chris was together. We went to the beach and he saw Liana in a bikini and did not like it, he ranted on like she was a grown ass girl. It made me laugh so much that day, he told Liana off and she was yelling things at back him. They are so cute together “I want that” she pointed at my shades “your shades are in the suitcases, go and tell uncle to go and find you them ok?” she nodded running off, I love my baby too much. Letting out a sigh, I have been here for two weeks now and I don’t want to leave but Jay wants a meeting with me in New York. The relationship with Mychal died, very quickly when the pictures of me leaving Chris’ house leaked. I dumped him over text, very petty of me, I know. I am feeling really happy about this though, more freedom being single.

Feeling someone tug at my legs, looking down and seeing Mel “bitch, if I fell in that pool I would kill you. I don’t need this weave to be wet just yet” Mel chuckled “don’t be telling Leandra that, she would kick you in the pool” Mel has a point “if that bitch does, I will cancel her ass and she will be removed from the jet ride home” looking over at Leandra “speaking about that, where we going? LA or New York? You keep giving me mixed answers” I paused thinking “well it’s been two weeks away from Chris and he is having a fit but we are going New York” I said “oh, what changed?” Mel held the side of the pool at the side of me “Chris seems to have these stupid outbursts and rants, I have been ignoring him but he text me saying I am turning Liana on him and I said the only nigga doing that is you, I called him last night and he was in a club but he has been in a club and studio for the past five days so Liana has not spoken to him. He asked for her and she won’t speak now” Mel’ mouth hung open “she is not here for his shit” shaking my head “she’s not, I think she asks for him and then when I am saying daddy busy she thinks he doesn’t want to speak to her, so she is sad about it” hearing Majesty and Liana both screaming “girls! No running, you can hurt yourselves” they make me nervous, it’s near a pool too.

Looking down at my nails sighing “you finished in there?” I shouted from outside the door, I don’t know how I trust that girl on her own in the bathroom, but she will only go to the toilet as long as I am not there. Potty training is the devil’ work “auntie how long?” Majesty stood in front of me “I don’t know, Liana will do as she pleases. It will be a wait” it has been a very weird experience for me and also difficult being out in events with her, I had to put a diaper on her most of the time but she is coming along just fine. She openly said she wants to be a big girl “lovey, lovey, kiss, kiss meee” Liana said, frowning at the wall “she sing” Majesty whispered “Chris Brown” she giggled placing her hand over her mouth “I see” crossing my arms over my chest, I can’t just stand here because I don’t know what she is doing. Pushing the door open a little, seeing Liana bent down, her behind in the air and a whole lot of toilet roll in hand “uhmmm you need help?” I asked, she is trying to wipe her own butt I ain’t going to complain “no mommy, I got it” she said, look at my baby go.

My daughter actually did a great job, I am proud of her “you tell mommy when you need toilet again” Liana held my hand “I am, I’m big girl now” she grinned “yes you are princess” walking down the steps “where did you go crazy?” Rajad said to Liana “I wipe my own butt!” Liana said, letting out laugh “really?” Rajad said, Liana nodded “I tell dad?” Liana asked, she is asking for him which is a good thing “of course you can” tugging at her hand “come then baby” Rajad gave me a smile “actually come, let’s go upstairs to call him” turning around “I talk dad, I tell him I swim” smiling from ear to ear, I love her so much.

Pressing the phone to my ear as I sat on the edge of my bed while the phone rang out, Liana stood in front of me staring at me all wide eyed, I hope he picks up “yo” Chris said, he picked up “shocking” I mumbled “Liana wants to speak to you” I said, he cleared his throat “uh yeah, hold up. Facetime me instead” he disconnected the call, I think he is in bed still “daddy wants to facetime you, come sit here” patting the bed, Liana giggled clapping as she climbed up on the bed. Watching her get comfortable, I tapped the icon to start the facetime and pass the phone to Liana, he doesn’t get the pleasure of seeing me first “little momma!” Chris said, Liana cheesed “dad” she stared at the phone in shock, bless my baby “look at you, you got a tan. You having fun there?” she nodded “dark” she pointed at the screen “yeah, I just woke up. I been awake working very hard for you, I miss you so much. Tell me what you been up too though” Liana looked up at me “tell daddy about you swimming” I don’t know what’s wrong with her now, she looked sad at that moment, she looked back at the phone “I play in water” watching Liana’ body language, it changed so quickly, that was weird “that sounds so fun baby, I saw pictures of you. You looked so pretty” Chris said “and, and” Liana pushed her hair back with her free hand “I wipe my own butt” I snorted laughing, I know she was dying to say that. Hearing Chris laughing ever so loudly “oh wow baby, you wipe your own butt now too? Stop growing” Liana giggled.

Liana keeps giving me these sad glares and I don’t understand why “baby, what is wrong? You wanted to talk to dad” she pouted looking down at the bed “what’s wrong?” Chris asked “I go there” she pointed at the phone “baby, you will come here soon. I promise, I will see you as soon you come back. You will see me and grandma, I will buy you a toy for wiping your own butt too” a small smile played on her face “Liana!! Come on, uncle is making us ice cream!” Majesty ran into the room, Liana gasped “dad, I go” she is too busy now “aight, I love you baby. Talk to me later” she nodded placing the phone on the bed, she shuffled off my bed and I was quick to grab my phone and straight disconnect it, I don’t wish to speak to the devil.

I was about to step out of my bedroom until I looked at my phone, he is calling me back “fuck my life” I whispered, closing my bedroom door answering the call “hello” I didn’t want to be rude and start an argument “sorry” he said “no need, I don’t care. I really don’t want to know unless you are calling in regards to Liana” I have no choice in that “don’t be like that with me Robyn” letting out a sigh “call me Rihanna please, Robyn is dead to you” I hate him calling me Robyn, the guy I loved called me that “I love you” he is so annoying “you had Ava lined up, I heard the interview. I don’t know what hurts more Chris, the fact you still have her around or the fact she walks into the home we bought together. I am still trying to decide on that. Did you have fun having sex on the same bed we made love on huh? The same bed we used to stay up at night on when Liana wouldn’t sleep, the same bed I showed you how to clothe, feed, change Liana diaper on because I was too lazy to show you in Liana’ nursery. You ruined all that shit in that home. I hope she is keeping you warm at night. Jesus, I hate you and I hate myself too” the phone is silent “anyways, I am going New York, not to despite you but because I have a meeting. You see how normal people work, they don’t go and destroy a whole life in one night. They speak, you know like I am doing now. If there is anything you can do right in the world is please do not let Liana down, when she wants you to talk to her then you fucking talk to her, you walk out of that club and you drop your fake hoes. Don’t upset my daughter, goodbye Chris” disconnecting the call, throwing my phone on the bed just because I do not want to talk again because he will ring back.

Staring at the wall rather than this movie, I have no idea what my family is watching because my mind is somewhere else. I think I am in denial, Chris had this girl already there. Wasn’t I good enough for him, I don’t understand because he says one thing and does another. I feel like shit because not to be big headed but she is not on my level, he never gets another girl as good as me. I bet that girl is living it up, the very home. Taking in a sharp breath, that place brings me bad memories and I hate it. We have had lovely memories but that one night ruined everything, when he said to me that he would fuck another girl I knew he would, it still pains me that I had to grab everything I could and leave that home with my daughter. Dramatic as it sounds I didn’t want there to be an argument because it would have been and Liana would be there, she would have heard. This way Liana heard nothing, all she knows is that we moved but kept asking why and I said that mommy and daddy are happier this way and this happens sometimes, I lied about the mommy part though. Feeling someone poke my side, turning my head “come” Mel waved me over, pushing myself off the couch.

With my arms crossed against my chest “you good bitch?” I shrugged not saying a word, Mel held out the blunt for me “you need it” she said, taking the blunt from her “Mychal messaged me on Instagram” taking in the blunt slowly “he said he acted stupid, he wants to fight for you. Get you back I guess” rolling my eyes as I blew the smoke out “I don’t have the time, I am over men” passing the blunt back to Mel “heard Chris kicked ole girl out of the car” I do not care, I remained silent “I know I can’t really do anything to make you happy and with the way you are feeling, you will somehow find a way to get yourself better because I know you do. You have got me if you need me whenever” opening my arms, shuffling over to Mel “thank you, just I always find myself being the joke. I bet god laughs at me when I go back to him” embracing Mel “love sucks Robbie, there is always that moment where Chris does change but you got us, you got Liana. God gave you the greatest gift” stepping back from Mel “thank you” this is why I run to Barbados, no negativity. Even though I am the fool to go back to Chris when everyone told me no, I will be back on top once get back to America, nothing will bring me down.