#But I think it's mostly because they are not satisfied with my current state

[missshame]

My parents made me tell them how I feel and then they got mad and told me to get some help

[reasonsforhope]

Upcoming Blog Thing

So I'm currently in the process of making a sideblog-for-a-sideblog for Reasons for Hope.

The idea is to use it to post mostly links/info on direct action (how to's, petitions, official government calls for comment on proposed policies, protests, info about cool things other activists are doing, etc. etc.) that doesn't fit on a good news blog. Plus informational/awareness posts, and my own activism and thoughts and takes about things that sometimes really, really do not belong on a good news blog. Or that half belong on a good news blog and half really don't, and the like.

The idea is also to create an official "format" for submissions so that people can send in posts without me having to take the time/spoons to make new posts out of ppl's asks and dms (this takes sooo much time sometimes). Then, if successful, do a similar thing for submissions on Reasons for Hope, bc I do want to make posts about lots of things ppl send me, but it would be way too much to do myself all the time.

I'd still be verifying everything and applying editorial standards, in both cases. I actually already wrote up most of an editorial standards policy for the new sideblog, too. It would include verifying and listing the sources and dates for everything, at a minimum.

I've been thinking about going ahead and doing this for quite a while now, but I finally decided I needed to go for it because uh. I just found out about something absolutely, completely fucked up that happened to my grandparents (and a lot of other people). And while I am planning to get involved in organizing about it in real life around the relevant issues (or at least flyer the shit out of relevant neighborhoods), I really need to be able to use what platform I have to talk about this - along with other issues - so I have somewhere to channel my rage and grief into activism

(You will hear more about what happened when the sideblog goes up, if you want to see know. For now, let's just say that it's been a really intense 48 hours.)

Also you know I actually have a small-to-moderate platform here and that's a hell of a lot more ability to reach people than I tend to have in person, esp with ~life~ and ~working~ and my disability shit

So yeah, heads up you have that to look forward to (if you want to engage). And there will be unique tags to filter for people who want to see the links to actions and organizing info without seeing the info about fucked up stuff.

Because I am firmly of the opinion that people can and should be able to engage with that kind of content only where and when they feel up for it, if they want, and especially if they're really struggling with spiraling over the state of things.

Anyway, let me know in the notes if there's anything you would particularly like to see from the upcoming sideblog. (I make no promises but would value information on this!) And if you have any thoughts on what I should call it because I haven't been able to figure out something satisfying yet.

[fishhjuice]

dottie my dear friend dottie i need that kikura essay

My dearest friend Ari you probably know all of this already FDSFDSFJLSD

Classmates. Maybe less.

I think the relationship between Uotora and Beika is "I know you better than anybody". And i think between Kikura and Beika is "I understand you better than anybody", despite how different they are, and how far they've come together, because they did not like each other AT ALL at first.

I think of them as being foils to Ichiya, and having a reversal of his character arc. Despite being Splatlandian, Kikura grew up in Inkopolis but their family had to move back to Splatlands when their fortune took a turn for the worse, which Kikura... disliked. Kikura , kinda spurred by how their family thought of Splatsville, thought themselves better than everyone in Splatsville through the virtue of being raised in Inkopolis and made this very well known to anyone.

I think they are quite the formidable fighter now, but back then their attitude got them bullied a lot. I especially headcanon people used to pull their hair to piss them off, which they could do nothing about since their mother wanted their hair to stay long, no matter how much they wanted to cut it. Speaking of parents, I think they had very controlling and over-perfecting tiger parents that to a degree meant well but overall restricted Kikura. They thought through their smarts (which i headcanon them to be, quite so) they could make it back to Inkopolis and (bring their family with them as a duitful child and) never have to think about Splatsville ever again. With all this stress and discontentment, their form escapism from Splatsville and their parents was... That one demo from that Inkopolis band that got leaked on the internet.

So Kikura's "shit" taste got someone specific's attention, and Beika told as much to their face that she thought their taste was shit, and reccomended some better stuff.

More under the read more bc you'll never guess, this got long

They didn't get along at ALL. Beika was kind of the person Kikura could not stand, satisfied with everything Splatsville could give her without wanting more (as far as they knew). And yet, because there seemed to be no true malice, mostly snark and sarcasm that Beika matched Kikura in energy, they. Talked. Mostly because there was no one else who would talk to them.

They were asshole kids angry at the world in their own way, but Beika seemed to be especially able to get under Kikura's skin.

"Does your parents know you are listening to -agasp- Rock Music?? Or is it your way of rebelling?" (They did not. Yes, it was.)

"Do you only do things your parents tell you to do" (Pretty much.)

"Will you ever do anything for yourself?"

And with how competitive and how much of a perfectionist Kikura was, i think they found themselves wanting to somehow impress this inkling and prove her wrong.

I think Kikura used to basically dream about doing somethign crazy like, learning the guitar, and the guitarist from that SQSQ being also self-taught gave them... hope? It's not quite hope but like, it felt like if they went out of their way, they could actually do it. WELL, if they didn't fear their parents' anger and dissapointment.

Well now they found pettiness in their heart, so they got themselves a guitar as soon as possible, in secret. The unbridled joy and terror they felt, the adrenaline rush kept them practicing more and more until Uotora learnt about them, and forced Beika to accept letting Kikura into the band and play.

Bit by bit, Beika (and Uotora who is an angle but also at times a pushover) got Kikura to rebel in small other ways till they were able to cut their hair.

As their love for the band grew, they came to appreciate the town that made them who they were. I think in their current state they are rather embarrased of the little shit they used to be. They started to wanting to stay and make Splatsville a better place.

I think Kikura realized Beika was hurting due to... Something, that she didn't talk about and Uotora glazed over. Something in the shape of Beika's ex guitarist hanged in the air. As the trust grew between them, Beika bit by bit told the story of how she was left behind and learnt to not want much from life, that thing Kiki hated about her. She and Uotora painted the picture of a selfish person Kiku came to hate for hurting their only true friends. (Uotora might have even exaggrated a bit) But I think they realized the full scale of everything when they heard the song C-side was playing on the radio. Things made a lot more sense then.

They made it their duty to become the best guitarist that there is. They had the ambition, they knew how to study and practice. And as it turns out, biggest idiots in town taught themselves how to play the guitar, so it shouldn't be too hard.

I think them leaving for a while was Beika getting it into her head that Kikura would leave too, and pushing Kiku away until Kiku was basically made to leave. I think it was a nasty fight they didn't thought they would recover from, but they easily did with how much the two cared for each other. (This isn't like a full-fledged idea, perhaps i can talk about it another day uwu) With the confirmation one way or another, Kiku would always end up coming back, Beika loved them as freely as can be.

In some way Beika and Kikura gave each other the means of saving themselves, in a way saving each other. So, yeah. owo.

[lintwriting]

signalis, hope, and coping under authoritarianism: what does the artifact / lily ending mean?

“You’re like a fish that’s only now discovering that her whole life has been dictated by the movements of sea currents. That’s what ideology is. It’s like there are these invisible forces everywhere, pushing and tugging you this way and that, and you don’t even know they’re there.” “Is it even possible to imagine a world without ideology?” “Of course it’s possible.” - Disco Elysium (2019)

Hope - 我的未來不是夢 - My Future is Not a Pipedream

Something notable about Signalis is that although the anti-authoritarian politics are so visceral and in your face, the characters themselves rarely seem to comment on it. The closest thing we get is Elster calling the Nation of Eusan's flag useless.

You could imagine a different kind of video game would have Elster work in an underground resistance movement, but here, the most we get is Elster trying to save her girlfriend off the books and a comment about the flag. In fact, some players leave the game thinking it's "non-political."

The endings, similarly, feel visceral but mostly leave players confused. Different endings in video games are usually tied to player choice, and usually it's satisfying and direct. In Signalis, it's much more confusing and arbitrary, like the way many players say that the more experienced you are, the harder it is to achieve certain endings.

That's not usually the case in video games, because each ending is supposed to represent a player's choice, and often each run's ending reflects the player's individuality. There is some aspect of that, like "cowardice" or "aggression," but it's quite abstract and left to interpretation.

I think the endings and the politics are similar in feeling visceral and confusing because it represents the nature of choice under authoritarianism for Ariane and Elster: there's no freedom of choice, only the illusion of choice and the orders of the state.

Elster and Ariane are like the fish in that Disco Elysium quote. They live their whole life under authoritarianism and don’t know any different, because the water is an irrefutable constant to them (though Ariane maybe knew a little of what’s out there thanks to the book shop). The regime pushes them around and dictates their life like water currents, unseen but felt.

I've said it before, but this is best exemplified by two of the important settings in the game -- Serpinski and the Penrose. They represent the 'choice' Ariane had in the direction of her future before the events of the game. She could go to her death at a cruel prison mine, or she could join the space program to find a new world. She chose the latter, but it was an illusory choice -- both roads would've led to her death anyways, as she comes to find out on the 3000th cycle aboard the spaceship.

all the other characters are stuck repeating the choices in this time loop, until they're meaningless enough to not be choices at all.

Similarly, we don't get the choice to fight back against the regime. We barely get a choice in the 4 endings, but even that is illusory -- none of the endings are happy ones, and all of them are equally true, according to the Devs.

That exemplifies the point of authoritarianism--the enforcement or advocacy of strict obedience to authority at the expense of personal freedom, or choice.

Yet, Elster and Ariane found a place where they COULD imagine that the Nation's ideology doesn’t matter. Where authoritarianism doesn't matter. Being with each other on the Penrose, far away from any prying red eye of their surveillance state. It’s their own tiny world, and it reflects the way Elster doggedly pursues Ariane in-game rather than engage with the politics around her.

It reminds me of this comment I read about the lack of a happy ending in Signalis:

"For the longest time I thought Signalis had no happy ending but I realized it did have a happy ending... The game just happens after that good ending was supposed to end. Ariane and Elster lived happily together having escaped the regime's rule through the Penrose Program for what we can only assume was a lengthy enough amount of time to travel space to other planet(s) until the ship naturally broke down, but Elster is trying to cling on, refusing to accept that death is inevitable. Elster has the same mentality of a relative refusing to unplug their grandpa despite him having already happily lived his life to it's conclusion, instead she painfully extends Ariane's existence on life support when Ariane just wants to die peacefully because she already accepted its inevitability." - @SymbolCymbals2356 June 28, 2024 on Signalis and The Dissolution of Self: A Video Essay

The tragedy of Signalis is that they couldn’t truly escape authoritarian ideology. Their happy ending was a passing illusion.

And the Promise is Elster learning this fact over and over again, that she has to kill this happy ending, this dream, her denial, with her own two hands. The beauty in the tragedy is that, for them, it was indeed possible to imagine a world without ideology, but only for a little while.

coping under authoritarianism: what do the endings mean?

Under this interpretation, the endings correspond with the different ways people cope under authoritarianism, all equally useless at changing the outcome.

Memory is like Ariane has returned to being a fish. A return to ignorance, not really knowing anything. Ignorance is bliss.

Leave is like when people say “I’m going to go off into the wilderness to escape society” (which means death anyways because people can’t survive without society) because they’re unable to handle their bleak political reality.

Promise is facing it head on and accepting it, despite how much despair that brings.

And the Lily Ending is like intentional denial.

The Lily Ending

It’s like the Great Gatsby where Gatsby delusionally thinks he can go back in time to before Daisy married someone else for money.

It's like Ki-taek’s delusional dream that he’ll earn enough money buy back that mansion and his father’s freedom in Parasite.

It's like Puella Magi Madoka Magica's Homura Akemi stealing the power of her lover-turned-god so she can bend reality to have more time with her beloved, even though she knows this reality is unsustainable, either due to the energy needed to maintain it or because the god is starting to remember the old.

They know the reality, but choose to pursue delusional hope anyways.

Elster uses an Eldritch ritual to turn back the clock to before she and Ariane realized they were doomed, so they can have one last dance together, maybe for eternity. And yet, the red eye of authoritarianism is like a sword of Damocles hanging over their heads.

The Red Eye itself is a pretty flexible symbol, which the game points out to us by name dropping pareidolia, so it can represent many things: the evil god Elster sacrificed to in order to gain the power to bend reality, Ariane watching as Elster uses Ariane’s bioresonance to play dolls with reality, or the oncoming doom of realizing that their future is a pipedream.

Either way, the feeling of cold comfort/delusional hope remains the same. This is why this ending is the "special one" despite not being any happier than the others. It's emblematic of what Elster's character is doing throughout the game: Elster doesn't care about the world around her because she is focused on her own world, her life with Ariane. Her pipedream, her special brand of denial, of ignoring her political reality.

[theantarwitch]

About Comfort Zone and why is wrong used - Long Rant

Lately I been seeing a ton of people talking about the Comfort Zone, about how we can only grow if we step out it and all that, but mostly everyone forget to mention a little detail: The majority of the people have no Comfort Zone.

Let's back to the roots and copy and paste what wikipedia say about it: A comfort zone is a familiar psychological state where people are at ease and (perceive they are) in control of their environment, experiencing low levels of anxiety and stress. Bardwick defines the term as "a behavioral state where a person operates in an anxiety-neutral position." Brené Brown describes it as "Where our uncertainty, scarcity and vulnerability are minimized—where we believe we'll have access to enough love, food, talent, time, admiration. Where we feel we have some control.

So, the basic "rules" of the Comfort Zone says:

A) People must at ease and in basic control of their environment.

B) People are experiencing low levels of anxiety and stress.

C) The uncertainty, scarcity and vulnerability are minimized.

D) With well access to the basic needs (food, water, shelter, health care, hygiene, money, love, education, clothes, sleep, security... Pretty much the 3 basic levels of the Maslow's hierarchy of needs)

So, if you "fail" in some of the 4 basic "rules" of the Comfort Zone, you pretty much didn't have Comfort Zone.

Let's breal up that thing a little...

If you are not at ease (disconfort, anger, pain, sadness, uneasy, worried, etc), you are lacking Comfort Zone.

If you are not control of your environment (toxic/ traumatic house, abusive relationship, under manipulation, migration, homeless, disabled, etc), you are lacking Comfort Zone.

If you are experiencing high levels of anxiety and stress (pathologically high, unhealthy levels of it, panic attacks, floating anxiety, depression, PTSD, mostly all the mental illnesses), you are lacking Comfort Zone.

If you are uncertain, in scarcity and vulnerability (be part of a minority, experience racism, bullying, LGTBQIA+phobia, fatphobia, etc) and lacking some of the basic human needs, you are lacking Comfort Zone.

And if you are experiencing ALL OF THAT, you have NO Comfort Zone.

Now, let's have in mind the kind of world we are living currently... Many of us didn't have not even the basic level of the damn Maslow's pyramid and we have a "bingo" of a lack of all the 4 basic rules.. and the huge majority at least lack one of them... Why keep pushing about the Comfort Zone?

As a start, the main objetive of the Comfort Zone is self growth, things that are over the two basic layers of the damn pyramid. You NEED to have you BASIC NEEDS satisfied to focus in self growth. I'm not saying that you CAN'T pursue self growth if you are lacking them, but trully, your energy and mind have more urgent things to attend...

Example, myself. I lack of money and health care, I struggle with afford food and basic bills, I'm disabled and VERY neurodivergent, I suffer of Chronic Clinical Depression and Chronic Pain (with no meds and treatment because lol money) and I have problems to sleep, besides another huge chunck of issues. Do I try to grow as a person? OF COURSE! But I will not put myself on risk, for it. I need to grow in a way that I will not collapse because I haven't my basic needs covered. I DON'T HAVE COMFORT ZONE, so my growth must adapt to the little I can afford myself to do. I can't step over my Comfort Zone because I DIDN'T HAVE ONE TO START.

I repeat, you can't leave your Comfort Zone if you don't have it.

So, for the love of Maslow, people, stop to suggest to everyone to "step out the Comfort Zone" when, except some lucky ones (eat the rich), mostly of the normal people is struggling with not become homeless.

It feels invasive, like pushing us, and make us think that we are not growing enough and getting mentally better because we don't go out our "Comfort Zone". Feels like if you are drowing and some say "haha now try to swim with a shark and touch it, you will grow with that experience"... I'M DROWNING, I CAN'T BREATHE, I CAN'T EVEN OPEN MY EYES UNDER WATER, HOW I WILL TOUCH A SHARK?

Next time, be gently, be empathic. Self growth is great, but do it in a safe gentle way, that there are enough suddenly events in real life that will kick you out of your Comfort Zone by force, or even break your Comfort Zone, sometimes to the point that you will not have anything left.

Stop pushing, stop to add struggles when you are struggling every second of your life. Prioritize. You will have until the last second of your life to grow as a person, focus in your safety. Focus in create your Comfort Zone, in making it bigger, stronger. I want to see you happy, healthy and safe. I love you.

Edit: Someone also explain it amazingly here

[borisbubbles]

Eurovision 2024: #21

21. AUSTRALIA Electric Fields - "One Milkali" 27th place

Decade Ranking: 74/153 [Above wrs, below TBA]

We're on a gravitron as it tangles through them billions, illions of arseholes and angels. 💋 -- Michael Ross.

I'll open by pointing out that Zach's dress reminds me of those sail-backed tetrapods all mammals have descended from:

BorisBubbles.tumblr.com satisfying your autism AND paleontology fixes since 2017.

On other news, I'm happy to report I've never bought into the "Electric Fields Are Shock Qualifiers" hype. They had a song nobody cared about upon release, to represent a country nobody particularly wants in Eurovision. I'm AMAZED they almost floated into the semi over Serbia.

My personal feelings on the song are quite mixed, mostly because I always recognised "One Milkali" as both a televote flop and a missed opportunity. I always love when countries inject their music traditions into the entries they send to Eurovision, but in "Australia's "One Milkali'"'s case it was a fairly sloppy fusion. The soundtrack opens via Nokia ringtone before it explodes into a digital fart and segues into a generic, catchy EDM track that is in a constant state of competition with it's own background didgeridoo.

On top of that comes a libretto that, using a lot of confusing metaphors and dated pop culture references that border on nonsense, express a utopian vision of Universal Kinship that most people know to be factually untrue. None of us value life equally. I know SOME people find that offensive because they delude themselves into thinking they're good people, so allow me to demonstrate;

IMAGINE your least favourite famous person in the world; a politician or businessman or musician or actor, or writer of certain wizarding novels. Someone you strongly dislike and don't necessarily want dead, but say you'd would be very pleased if this person had chosen to be an accountant over their actual profession, obsessing over NUMBERS rather than their current trade. Now compare THAT person to your favourite people in the world: your parents,siblings, other halves, friends, pets, children (lol this is tumblr - exactly three of you will spawn offspring, the rest of you will grow old with two cats named after fictional characters such as "Khaleesi" and "Deban Aderemi".) You cannot put this person on the same level as them. You will not value this person's life AS much as you value your loved-one's lives, and that's perfectly normal human behaviour. We hold different standards for different people. Anyone who does not is a walking red flag.

With this in mind, you just know that One Milkali would be a hard sell because not many people connect with its intentions, especially now that Eurovision has made a shift towards Tory-ness (💀). It's naive, utopean and out of touch for those that get it and very confusing to those who do not.

I'm making it sound like I dislike Australia, but I actually really like the studio cut (it's better when you don't look). The studio version... well doesn't slap but at least swats? It was a sanitised, tranquilized version of "2000 and Whatever", which I LOVED, and I gave 1M(1B) a few loopings. I, like many people that remembered Electric Fields fondly, and was hoping they would die for Raiven for a live outsell.

Unfortunately, the live of "One Milkali" was not an outsell. If anything it undersold? It was lowkey a tranwreck?

Like, when your top moment of the performance is THE COLOUR PROJECTION AT THE START

(this bit actually ate! pity it happens literally within the opening seconds.)

and the second best moment is a literal ijbol moment when the didgeridoo player (this man is a LIVING DEITY btw) PLAYS HIS INSTRUMENT LIVE RIGHT INTO ZACHARIAAHA'S MIC, DROWINING HIM OUT.

IT'S RAININ' LO- :didge noises:

AND THEN HE HITS HIM WITH IT ON THE HEAD 😂😂😂

Yeah, a few choices were made which were a tad off. The worst one is allowing Michael Ross to vocalize because the man does NOT HAVE A GOOD VOICE. You have three backs, let them sing his bits. Not doing that is the second worst decision. The third worst is poorly mixing those backs in with a very strained Zachariaaha? Also, why are they strutting on the stage like models on a catwalk? Did Aisel have a few on sale from her X My Heart era?

The staging did a few things right - it was colourful, used the space well and had good camerawork. It got the basics right, at least.

It was a sloppy execusion of a clumsily composed song, but, I still enjoyed it overall. "One Milkali" is naive and utopean as fuck, and embraced that vibe and I appreciate that. The Yankunytjatjara bits are great and synergize well with the English. The song was an adequate representation of aborigine culture, hampered mostly by the fact that it didn't go hard enough when it needed to.

It ranks this high because putting it lower makes no sense to me. Unlike Poland, the vocals were acceptable, and the staging was linear and clear. Unlike Moldova, they had a song and a vision and displayed creativity? Unlike Azer and Iceland, Australia managed to fill the stage with some semblance of life and momentum. It still had flaws, but they were easy enough to accept. It makes sense that Aus were the highest NQ in the first semi, as they are on this ranking.

But lmao @ allowing any SF1 NQ to enter my top 20.

THE RANKING.

[wurdulac]

i don't like my art. i see what it lacks and i see my limited range. i'm not sure why do i keep trying to work on it. i don't know what it does for me. it doesn't feel like expression of creativity or imagination. i don't even do it the way i admire in art by my favorite artists. does it feel joyful or fun, the activity of it? i don't think it does. so i don't know if trying to "perfect it" is even a good goal. apart from never being satisfied from the work currently being done because of the unreachable goal it's also just... for what. so i can do something technically okay but also just soulless?

one thing that i can say is more of a positive effect is that doing art staves off the state of anxiety and guilt over not trying to do it. i guess it's better to just do something over feeling sick over not doing it and cursing oneself for not improving and your hand forgetting how to move.

there's another aspect that was always difficult for me to grasp but... there are artisans. like making things for the sake of making something that looks nice and not just serves the intended function is something people have been doing forever. things like working with patterns too. tattoos. and i can't internalize it for myself that doing things for the sake of it being pretty is fine too. because then maybe i could like i don't know, put my being mostly fixated on faces into other work...

i don't know how to unclog myself.

[coyote-nebula]

20 Questions for Writers

Thanks for the tag, @cuephrase and @wildsofmarch!

Also, thank you @motleyfam for locating the lost question lol

1. how many works do you have on AO3?

29

2. what's your total AO3 word count?

182,782

3. what fandoms do you write for?

Just Batman now

4. what are your top 5 fics by kudos?

Spike (3,470 words) - the kudos leader by far. I gave Tim roofie trauma, invoked by being stealth drugged at home. Kind of a spite fic categorically, but I think I'd prefer awareness as an intention over spite 😂 this author's life has been a bit weird Tim in a Bottle (38,683 words) - Tim, trapped in an industrial freezer with Jason, is attacked by memories in the text equivalent of a bottle episode. I know it combines two tricky qualities-- extensive conversation in one room and flashbacks-- but it seems to work alright anyway lol Tap Out (8,002 words) - Jason and family attend a gallery event for Damian, and Jason reflects on trusting Bruce. Now that I think about it, this is quite a lot like both Spike and Tim in a Bottle 😂 Except Tim (2,772 words) - Tim gets lost in the woods with his abandonment issues for company. Featuring both Bambi and Lady and the Tramp references Harvest (30,129 words) - Bruce and Jason harvest some corn and engage in hallmark movie emotion-having. I like the punchability to huggability ratio Bruce has is this

5. do you respond to comments?

Yep! Sometimes, lol. I'd love to answer all of them, but I don't have the spoons. I still reread and kick my feet over them though

6. what is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

Hmmm... Pretty much all my fics have some kind of comfort ending. I'm gonna go with a friend, though he may wander far, because of the guilt and injury it ends on.

7. what's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

Again, they all strive for a relatively happy ending... so I'll say sweetgum, which is pretty angst-free to begin with.

8. do you get hate on fics?

Every once in a while, but nothing memorable. Mostly they're some kind of out of nowhere complaint about deviation from canon, at which I tap the 'alternate universe' sign and delete

9. do you write smut? If so, what kind?

I don't. Not my thing!

10. do you write crossovers?

I haven't... if I did it would probably be pretty niche lol

11. have you ever had a fic stolen?

Not as far as I know

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

Nope. There is a pretty cool fic inspired by TiaB written in Polish, though!

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

Not too long ago! Me and @batbirdies wrote Tip for a Successful Interview: Lie (Down) :)

14. What's your all-time favorite ship?

Platonic: whatever I'm currently writing, usually 😂Tim & Jason, right now Romantic: This isn't my thing as much, but I do get a lot of amusement out of an ace batcat ship concept

15. What's a WIP you want to finish but doubt you will?

I stubbornly hold out hope for the completion of all my WIPs. That said, probably the Jason & Tim horror one lol

16. What are your writing strengths?

Weaving in flashbacks has gotten good feedback. In general, I think I'm pretty good at being concise (at least, I find editing off words a lot of fun)

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

Being a little too concise or obscure, sometimes 😂 losing clarity. Overcomplicating things until I either have an unwieldy WIP on my hands or have sacrificed my motivation for solving all the mysteries before I write the fic

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic?

I've played with it a little. I think <using brackets> so the translation is in-text works best for me

19. First fandom you wrote for?

Star Trek: The Original Series, unless you count the thinly veiled MASH fan comic I messed around with

20. Favourite fic you've written?

make me a cradle (1,811 words) - wrote this in a semi-fugue state and I'm uncommonly satisfied with it-- Alfred's voice has a neat quality, it's sufficiently punchy, and it does exactly what I wanted it to do. It even manages a comforty ending! Ironically, it's my lowest ranking fic by kudos 😂 probably owing to the sensitive subject (attempted suicide) and being marked incomplete (with another sensitive subject, grief over Jason's death, promised). (Now that I think about it, I think I might have stealth released this also lol) Seriously considering marking it complete, though, since it stands well on its own. The mentioned follow up might happen someday, but the mood to write incredibly sad fic doesn't happen very often!

I will tag @batbirdies and whoever else would like to claim I tagged them 😂

[insertpoetryhere]

Dadbastian Week: Identity

Wow look at that, posting the prompt on the day I'm supposed to. A thing I totally always do.

Anyways this is for @dadbastianweek2023 and let it be known I had a blast writing this and sneaking in things from an AU I will probably never write.

The Mighty Fall

Sebastian had been alive for more than a millenia. 

And no matter how long that seemed in the eyes of a human, it was even longer to the demon who had been forced to endure it.

There was no good way to spend a thousand years. When he had been mortal, the idea of living so long had been a fantasy. But the only reason why it was desirable was because it was supposed to be impossible. A 30 year old merchant could dream of living forever as much as he wanted, that didn’t mean he would ever get the opportunity.

How stupid he would feel now if only he knew.

The marvel of immortality faded the first time Sebastian got hungry. It was a different type of hunger, one that wouldn’t ever grant him the release of death if he couldn’t satisfy it.

And satisfy it he did. It only takes a few decades for whatever imitation of guilt he had once had to make way to pleasure. The hunt was fun, but the shaping of a soul was even more entertaining. Sebastian had convinced kings to behead their queens, mothers to drown their own children, pious men to burn entire cities to the ground in the name of a god that they would never meet.

A soul was sweeter when you were what caused it to fall so far.

As said before, there is no good way to spend a thousand years. But he had possibly found and delighted in every single bad way to do it.

Which is what made his current state so ironic.

Sebastian held up the crystal glass he was polishing up to the light, humming a little tune he had been adding little bits and pieces to while he looked for any spots he missed. The rest of the household was fast asleep, his favorite time of the day since it meant there was no one in his way for the next few hours.

In that time he had managed to reorganize the pantry, beat out the rug in the foyer, and now he had even finished polishing the nice crystal (which mostly just collected dust in a cupboard since the young master felt the set was “too flashy”). He placed the glass back in its proper place, feeling very self satisfied as the dinnerware glittered even in the darkest corners of the cupboard.

That's when he felt the faintest pull in his chest.

He sighed, a glove hand placing itself over where a human heart would be without him telling it to do so. “It’s just a dream.” He said seemingly to no one.

There was another, stronger tug.

“Go back to sleep.” He nearly begged, thinking of the list of chores he still needed to do.

The next one was like a dagger, sharp and impossible to ignore when it passed through him.

Sebastian rolled his eyes. “Damn it all to hell-” 

He grabbed his candle off of the kitchen counter and made his way upstairs, secretly hoping that the sensation in his chest would ease away as the subject faded back to sleep. That hope faded when he heard the screaming from the hallway, traveling through the thick mahogany door despite the fact that Ciel didn’t need to be loud to get the job done.

“-BASTIAN!” The frenzied screaming hit his ears like a freight train as he opened the door without knocking (there was no point in doing so, since there was no way Ciel would hear him over his own cries). “SEBASTIAN!”

“Yes my lord?” Sebastian nearly had to yell just to be heard. “I’m here!”

He rushed to his young master’s bedside, but didn’t dare move any closer than that as Ciel’s screams died and turned into desperate pants and heaving breaths. The boy’s wild eyes flicked to him, like he wasn’t sure who was talking to him.

“You’re alright, my lord. It was just a dream, you’re s-” Sebastian choked on his words. He brought a hand up to his neck as he realized that what he was about to say technically wasn’t true. Ciel wasn’t “safe” by any means.

Especially not with him.

“... You are unharmed.” He amended, his voice softer now that he didn’t need to fight to be heard.

Ciel’s eyes focused a little more, though he was still clearly dazed from whatever horror he had been forced to relive. Sebastian waited patiently for an order, whether it be to stay there until he fell back asleep or to go away and never speak of this again.

But Ciel did neither. Rather, in one quick motion that would have been almost too fast for a normal human to process, Ciel launched himself at Sebastian. His arms wrapped around Sebastian’s neck, pulling him down to his level and forcing him to drop to one knee to avoid losing his balance. The candle that was in his hand fell to the ground, the force of impact smothering the flame and leaving them in total darkness.

Sebastian tensed, at first presuming the action to be an attack. He made an attempt to gently remove Ciel, but paused when the movement only made Ciel cling to his shoulders harder.

“NO!” He screamed too close to Sebastian’s ear, his voice weak with sobs as he pressed his face into Sebastian’s jacket.

… Ah. Sebastian thought to himself, a strange uncertainty creeping up his spine. Not an attack..

Sebastian cleared his throat, moving his arms and hesitantly allowing them to wrap around the boy’s torso. Ciel took the shift in position as an open invitation to bury himself even deeper into Sebastian’s embrace, hiding his face fully in the safety of Sebastian’s shoulder.

Sebastian allowed him to stay like that for a few minutes before attempting to pull back once more. The movement was met with much less resistance this time, with Ciel only whining pitifully as he felt Sebastian start to pull away. Still, it was enough to convince Sebastian to stay put.

It was hardly appropriate for a butler to cradle his master like a toddler. Of course Sebastian knew that. But Ciel seemed to need it and no one else was around to witness their lapse in manners, so really what was the harm?

Carefully, he lifted both himself and his young master up onto the bed in hopes that a more comfortable position might help the child soothe himself back to sleep. Ciel sniffled as he settled himself against Sebastain’s chest, a blanket now thrown over his shoulders. His grip around Sebastain’s neck relaxed, making it easier for Sebastian to turn them in a way that would make it easier to settle Ciel back against his pillow once sweeter dreams finally took him.

“There, there.” He whispered, Ciel’s dark hair soft against his chin as he rested it on the top of the boy’s head. A feeling almost like nausea washed over him as he rocked the crying boy back and forth as if he were a baby. “You mustn't work yourself up like this.”

The two stayed like that for another fifteen minutes, with Sebastain shushing Ciel until he could feel his breaths even out and his heart rate slow down. Sebastian stopped rocking, but still didn’t move until he could hear Ciel’s soft snores, barely audible as they were muffled against the thick material of his jacket. Carefully, he peeled the sleeping boy off of him and laid him back down against his favorite pillow. He took the thick comforter and pulled it all the way up to Ciel’s chin, tucking him in firm enough to stave off the cold autumn air that sometimes snuck its way through to cracks in the window frame. 

Sebastian once leveled cities and erased entire bloodlines from the face of the earth. 

Now he comforts little boys when they’ve had nightmares and rocks them back to sleep once he’s done.

He leaned down, picking up the candle he had dropped when Ciel hugged him. He stared at it, still making out every detail despite the darkness surrounding him. He grimaced in disgust.

Oh, how the mighty fall.

[crosbyism]

Fic Writers Q & A

tagged by @dadvans (like a fortnight ago, lol my bad bud, thank u boo)

How many wips do you have currently? like 9, and actively working on about two. fucking r i p, my writer’s block is absolutely taking me out back to the glue factory right now.

Which one are you finding the hardest to finish? Why do you think that is? I’ve been struggling with creative block for a while, so everything is hard right now. But for sure the ones that are hardest are the ones I’ve made the least progress on— where I love the idea and have written some scant words but maybe haven’t found the voice or the sticking points. It’s really important to me to find an emotional core while I’m writing. Sometimes that manifests as a certain atmospheric vibe given by the POV character’s emotional state bleeding into the narration (see nuts and bolts and the low tide), sometimes that’s a very concrete topic or discussion that the fic is centered around (like who can grow me), and sometimes it’s just about hitting the right narrative voice. In Pornstache and the Dogg, that sort of narrational style that’s (comedically) commenting on the events as if from after-the-fact (“It wouldn’t have happened the way it did…”; “And if it weren’t… then Nate would never ask…”; “That’s how Nate ends up…”)— I slid into that almost right away. Although it took quite a while, it was really smooth going from start to finish, and I think I even wrote it chronologically (which is unusual for me) because getting into the flow of that voice propelled me on really well. I think of it like a river: if the established current (=narrative voice, emotional core) is really strong, it’s a lot easier for me to just ride that current and let it take me where I need to go. So when I don’t have that, or am still trying to find it, that’s really hard. It’s why long-ish fic is really hard for me, because I’ll have an idea that I can plan out, that’s easy to sort of map plot points out for, but then the actual writing process is really hard because while I know what needs to happen, actually finding the voice for the story around it beomes a challenge. For me, doing it the other way around is much easier, because rearranging plot points or dialogue is very easy and natural for me if the groove of the narrative voice is well-established for me to slip into. It’s why I think of myself as more of an editor than a writer, because I find it a lot easier to rearrange my writing in order to get to a satisfying emotional ending— which is, to me, the whole point of writing.

What does it usually look like when inspiration strikes for you? It looks very random, haha. No rhyme or reason whatsoever, very mercurial lightning-in-a-bottle type shit, which makes it harder to capture. I do actually get boosted creatively a lot by spitballing with friends (most notably dadvans, who really lights my fuse like no one else), but other than that it’s unfortunately hard-to-plan, haha.

Do you curate playlists for each fic or is your process different? For a lot of fics, yeah, but not for every fic. what’s much more common is that I’ll curate either a ship playlist or a playlist for a certain mood or atmosphere, and it’ll get me in the right mindset to write e.g. a creepy scene; a sex scene; shenaniganery; etc. It’s all about mood-setting, for me.

Do you go balls to the wall and write as you go or are you more organized? I think of it as writing as I go like 90% of the time, but I don’t think that’s exactly true. It’s funny bc I always have certain beats I wanna hit for sure or plans that have evolved by midway through writing. That’s true for smut as much as for anything else. For smut it can be sex acts or sexually motor-revving moments for the characters (which, to me, is always emotionally significant), but mostly it’s an emotional beat. But it can work out to be structural elements too! For example for who can grow me I knew that the logical ending of the fic was the end of the weekend, and I’d already written and conceptualised the conversations that needed to happen within the fic/timespan of the weekend, so I ended up making a timeline midway through the process to more concretely figure out what conversation needed to happen when, so that it’s sort of “all ticked off the checklist” by the time they leave the cabin at the end of the fic. After scribbling down a timeline and planning it all out, it became clear that the last scene didn’t need to happen right before they left and that I didn’t need to make them leaving the cabin a part of the fic at all, since it was more important that it should happen the morning after The Big Emotional Talk. So I MacGyver’d it into the final scene happening on the second to last day, as they’re going out for a little hike. Because for the emotional beat, it was more important for Matthew to finally ask for something from his brother, trust him in that way, and for Brady to be able to give it to him, to sort of reforge the trust and emotional connection. So that ended up being a change made through logistical planning. What that did mean is that an easter egg that I planned fell through (Brady and Matthew were going to meet the mysterious owner of the cabin coming in as they’re going out, and sort of lift the minor mystery of who the cabin even belongs to), but since the emotional story was more important, it was a cut I was pretty happy to make.

tagging: @crosmack @imafriendlydalek @plethoriall bc i’m curious (no pressure tho buds ❤️) and anyone else who wants to. talking about this was actually really fun!

[strawberrytalia]

omg! i wanna do a few:

top 5 dc characters!

top 5 comic series!

top 5 animals!

OMG hi ella!!! 🫶 OH THESE ARE HARD

Top 5 dc characters (omg I feel bad ranking them)

Duke Thomas - who’s surprised 😭 no but he’s without a doubt my fave bat. i think there are just so many inspiring things about him, and he represents the aspect of comics I love most - stepping up and doing what’s right even when all odds are against you

Carol Ferris - I used to talk about her 24/7 when I was heavy in my GL phase, but I never stopped loving her. I love that she’s deeply flawed and angry and passionate, and she gets to be messy. Also she influenced me to be more comfortable expressing myself femininely which was hard as a brown girl ngl anyways carol <333

Ollie Queen - LMAO idk why but I feel so cliche putting him, but he’s my favorite Arrow and he always has been. I relate to him a lot. He’s really introverted, in his own head despite being is outspoken, he loves nature, cares deeply, and he isolates when he’s sad. I also like his very black-and-white thinking, esp when it gets challenged. live laugh love ollie queen

Talia Al Ghul - I won’t say much about her lmao bc talia stans are like sharks here, but she is also very important to me. Like you ever get that character that just seizes your heart???? Yeah that’s Talia for me 🥺 i don’t post abt her often either, but i love her sm

Khalid Nassour - it’s hell being his fan, but i’ll do it anyways 😭 so Khalid is rlly interesting bc i read his “cool” appearances first then read Dr Fate 2015 where he was more of an annoying 22 yr old. And it was so satisfying watching him grow from someone who was more narrow-minded and whitewashed to an intelligent, capable, and enlightened person. I really enjoy his character’s spin on what fate means in regards to one’s identity, heritage, lifestyle, and faith.

Top 5 comic series (THIS IS ALSO HARD OMG)

Day of Vengeance - this is the one currently living rent free in my head rn bc it’s so FUNNY and random, but also a really interesting storyline in regards to magic in the DCU. It’s just so enjoyable watching this group of mystics handle the hugest threat ever and barely get along, and they’re all weird, and then Lori joins and she’s like the group teenager and it’s so funny

We Are Robin - I honestly wish it was longer ngl but I really wanted to see more of the group together and their stories, especially Izzy and Dre. The premise and duration of this story is SO dear to me bc ofc Duke, but also I love watching kids band together against authorities bc they love their city sm.

Batman: Son of the Demon - as a Talia and sometimes Brutalia fan, how can I not 😭 It’s so sad and actually heartwrenching how happiness was so close to them but taken away, and how much Bruce and Talia sacrificed for each other because they are both loving people, they just love in the wrong way

Green Arrow: The Longbow Hunters - perfect Ollie. Perfect depiction of his mind. Really good storytelling. SHADOOOOO she served cunt and dc didn’t like that so they ruined her. Her initial appearance was so charming i literally made it my header. I like ethical dilemmas and the one in this story is so good. Also shoutout to Eddie fr

Green Lantern: Blackest Night - OKAY THIS IS THE ONE I WAS AFRAID OF SHARING 😭 I’m SORRY i love this for so many reasons, nostalgia mostly bc I re-read it over and over again at the peak of my hal obsession era idk why, I like the giant white entity, I like when all the Corps leaders have to team up and they’re all side-eyeing each other sm, and I also love when random heroes get involved and help save the day like Mera, Ray, Barry, Diana, Grant, watching them all try to survive it while battling grief in front of them. It is NOT THE BEST GL COMIC EVER but it’s one of my faves.

Top 5 animals (I love this question!!!!)

CATS 🫶 I used to have a cat when I lived in the states!! his name was austin, he was 8 years old, and he was the cutest thing ever. we had to give him away when we moved 😭 i still hate that my mom did that sm

SEALS!!!!!!! 🦭

Orcas 🐋🐋🐋 I like them a lot, they’re so adorable

Otters!!! 🦦

Flamingos 🦩 (hehe my username for a reason) they’re pink and i like all things pink also they’re so pretty

[goddessofroyalty]

I know people write omegaverse as an excuse to justify who the bottom is so sorry if youre not into it but have you thought about having Sanji top Zoro in your fic? He keeps mentioning that he's still a man even if he's an omega and maybe being the penetrator might help him get over some of his angst with their deal

I actually have and it's something that kept sitting on my "next porn round options" list for a while until I realised that it doesn't actually work. At least where the fic is at currently.

Because where it's at currently they're only sleeping together at all when their biologies' require it (Sanji's heats and Zoro's ruts) and Sanji is justifying any attracting he has as like the unfortunate result of his omega biology (note though he doesn't dislike that he's an omega... just dislikes that he's attracted to men and has convinced himself he's only attracted to them as an unfortunate result of his designation). And in those moments the most effective way to deal with their cravings/desires is for Zoro to top. So they're both going for that because they have their stated goal is to help with the urges of the heats/ruts not to like have a good time (although they sure aren't hating what their doing).

I haven't included it because it hasn't really fit (and Sanji has only had 2 chapters in his POV and that was for Zoro's rut) but I do think Sanji has already thought about it. Because there is a part of him that already wants to but he's purposely ignoring it because that would require admitting he wants to sleep with Zoro in a way that isn't just purely to satisfy their biological urges. And he's still a long way off being ready to admit that to himself.

On Zoro's part, while I think he would be cool with it, he hasn't thought about it yet. Mostly because I don't think he actually like pre-thinks out things/kinks he wants to try with Sanji. Everything he does is very much an in-the-moment decision. And they haven't been in a moment that's had that thought come to his mind. Also you know broader cultural stuff of that not being the expectation of how an alpha/omega male/male pair fuck is also playing a (minor but still a) part in him probably not going to be thinking about it unless/until Sanji brings it up.

So basically once they work their shit out and accept their feelings (or at least Sanji works his shit out and stops hiding behind the excuse of he's only doing this because of biology) it's probably going to soon follow. Because, yeah, Sanji is a man not just an omega, that's an important part of his identity, and it's kind of only fair by that point.

... although maybe I'll write a "yeah this isn't canon as far as this verse is concerned but I wanted to write it" fic thing like I did with To The Very Limits...

[historia-vitae-magistras]

Hi, Hello! I just read (probably) most of your current blog (I saw that your previous blog was purged by Tumblr, sorry to hear that.. Glad you're back!) but not yet all the fics, but I think that holy macaroni, it's AWESOME! They sound human yet *not*, and how you tie their headcanons based on actual historical interactions!! If it's okay, I would like to ask about Zee and Jack. How's their relationship with Arthur's other colonies and neighbors in Asia and Oceania (continent)? Like, are they mostly estranged from the other colonies, or do they find some kind of kinship in their situations? (I heard that many Malaysians and Singaporeans, along with other SEA neighbors of theirs. It's funny how it's made in Australia but most consumed in that area).

Okay, I am so sorry, this has been in my box for like a month but better late than never, right? and Thank you! I'm very glad that's satisfying for you! And oh, very good question. I'm not sure what you were referring to that Australia makes that popular in Malaysia and Singapore, I'm going to guess it's Milo or maybe Vegemite. But I'm not sure, so I will try and answer this without that info, and I'm going to be speaking in broad generalizations. I am from the opposite end of the Commonwealth, and I am not all-knowing so this pretty birds-eye-view and not a Kiwi flightless bird sort of bird's eye view.

So it's both. Stiff and friendly, slightly estranged but also close. Geography puts them in the Asia-Pacific. They have a lot in common with their neighbours. In general, it's good, but it's also complicated. In a lot of ways, Jack and Zee float in their little bubble down there, but they have very different outlooks on this. But they are both friendly and on good terms with their neighbours. Jack and Zee both are very casual people; they're friendly overall. Both because they value egalitarianism but also because they embodied unique positions as they grew up. Both have large populations of European origin while being much farther from Europe than North America. So they tend to orbit each other more than other neighbours because they both get a lot more of a say in imperial policy than their neighbours. Their current relations are still affected by the imperial rank they were both given as dominions. New Zealand and Australia were both mini-empires within the British Empire, being delegated roles of power over some of their neighbours. New Zealand governed several islands and still does, Australia has a similar role, and both play a powerful role in projecting what used to be British Imperial power and is now somewhat more multilateral but still very much a continuation of that role.

Jack, on the surface, gets on well with his neighbours; he's friendly, egregious, and hard not to like. He's good at making people feel included; he's good at having fun. Like it's hard not to have a good time around him, but he is also a son of the British Empire and something of a cadet to the American Empire. He's very casual, and there's at least a pretence of equality he prefers to act on, but these power dynamics are still a part of his relationship with his neighbours. He doesn't like thinking about it much; the childhood he had and his relationship with Brighid made an impression on his brain in such a way that he can be pretty unaware of how much power he actually has and how his ability to be casual and show no deference is in itself a privilege. But he'd get on quite well with Singapore and Malaysia. He is a bit blind about his placement and doesn't understand why they can be stiff, much more so earlier in history than now.

Zee is more aware. Her life and existence are more of a duality. Jack had no founding treaty, and the British rolled along because they didn't much care as long they had a place to shove convicts. Whereas Zee was at least theoretically founded as a state of co-sovereignty. Is that how it played out for the Māori most of the time? No. It gave them, at least legally, more rights than indigenous people in other settler colonies. They didn't have it easier than other indigenous people, but they were more successful long-term and fought like hell at every step. So Zee is Polynesian. The Māori are Polynesian. Zee's worldviews are very much a duality, and I think that made her more aware of her position. It didn't always play into her choices, and she is still relatively powerful in her sphere. I think she spends more time with her neighbours and is more aware of their linguistic and ethnic complexities than Jack tends to be. Tonga, Fiji, New Caledonia, Malaysia, and Singapore, they're friendly. She's less perky, sunny or social than Jack but also much more aware and emotionally intelligent than he is.

[rythmicjea]

Hobbyism is the best way to get through grief. ~Cole Sprouse

NEW FIC BACKSTORY

Okay... so... This is an odd one (and a long one). This is kind of representative of my current "chaos era". It's a bit of a story and I put most of it in the A/N. But this was not a story I was ever intending to write. In fact, I am not part of the fandom (scandalous I know), and better yet, I had no idea that the show even existed until this past November... But apparently it was big! My excuse is that I was not of the demographic for it age wise. I think if it's age appropriate, anyone can watch anything. Rock on, man.

The backstory of this goes, I found out that my baby boy (cat) Jayne, had advanced kidney disease. For a brief and shining moment, I thought that he would beat the odds. Unfortunately, he was gone within two weeks. I held him as he passed. I have a little altar to him on my desk because he will never be forgotten. But, in my grief, I knew I needed to find an outlet. While I can't journal write (I absolutely hate it lol) I can tell stories. And I wanted to write something very dark and nihilistic that basically combined Peaky Blinders with Riverdale (Chaos Era).

So while I was falling down the Jeronica rabbit hole, I was gathering playlists and mashup videos to aid in my inspiration. But, the story refuse to appear. Instead, YouTube kept suggesting clips from a show I had never heard of. And the clips were OLD. Like from over 10 years ago. Though I said I was uninterested the recs kept coming. So I did ONE google search. I read ONE synopsis. I saw a cast list and I saw a timeline of a relationship. I thought that was all I needed. My brain said NOPE!

The timeline of this relationship ended every entry with "and they hugged". I was very confused about why this couple was only hugging. Then when I saw that the last episode was graduation I got a little more incensed. I had two puzzle pieces that didn't connect without a third. So, I asked around. I have friends that were of the age demographic at the time this was on. And every one of them said that 1.) they loved the show and 2.) It was a very Disney show. Now, there were some sporadic kisses here and there but I remember being that age in high school and while I wasn't some "light BDSM scene on the second time I ever had sex" (Looking at you Bughead in Riverdale...) I definitely did more than just hug my high school boyfriend.

Even though I wasn't satisfied with the answer I thought that was the end of it. My brain had other ideas. My brain told me that if I didn't write this story then I would never write again. Well. That's death to a creative type like me. While I never wrote every day or even put out stories consistently, I was still crafting stories in my head. I needed to be able to write. I was in a desperate state. So I thought "fine, I'll write 3000 words, delete it, and then write what I want."

I wrote 10,000 words in one sitting.

I wrote 50,000 words in 18 days.

I didn't watch the show until I was like 80% done with the fic.

It currently stands over 100,000 words.

If you've made it this far you're going "WHAT IS THE STORY?!"

Okay, I'll tell you. It turns out I was being recommended the clips because of an actor. This actor is Cole Sprouse. I knew him mostly as Ben Geller from Friends. I didn't know he had an actual career before Riverdale. I just thought he did something as a kid, and then came back after college. I was so wrong... So so so so so wrong...

If you guessed The Suite Life of Zack and Cody and The Suite Life on Deck you would be correct.

This massive story started as a way to explain why Cody and Bailey "only hugged". Turned into a love story. I made Zack not straight and married to a man with identical twin girls. London is a pediatric surgeon (and I still stand by that decision knowing what I know now). And Cody and Bailey are probably the least likable characters in the entire thing but they are relatable. This is a story of trying to find love after you discover the amount of abuse you went through. Why running from things is not ideal. And maybe, even when you live an outlandish life, there's some normalcy to discover. It's kind of dark, but there's a lot of humor. If you're not familiar with the show, I would just think of it as an original work. (I know, I know... certain death for a fanfic writer lol)

If you enjoy it, please drop a kudos and my comments section is open and I welcome kind and constructive criticism and questions. Like, fuck me up with questions. Please.

[cf56]

My thoughts on episode 5

SPOILERS for season 3, episode 5 of the Animaniacs reboot.

Yes, we're still doing this. This episode contains Teeniacs, the one I've been obsessing over for months, theorizing about, posting screenshots, answering asks. Did it live up to expectations?

...what do you think? While it turned out to mostly be a funky screenshot collection, and possibly trailer bait, I'm not going to let my extremely overinflated expectations and current ravaged emotional state trick me into saying this segment was bad. It was pretty good for what it was.

The one thing I'm legitimately disappointed about is that we didn't actually get Teen Dot. I wanted to see an aged-up Warner, even if for just a few seconds in a joke segment. Turns out they were the same age and the perspective of the animation was playing tricks on us. Well, maybe alternate Dot was a little taller. Not anything drastic, though.

We did still get to see an alternately aged Dot.

We've already seen baby Dot multiple times in the past, though, so it's not as exciting.

I liked the way Yakko said "bro" and acted as Wakko's wingman.

I enjoyed seeing this, especially how excited he sounded to say it:

Does this mean Yakko is 15 now? Maybe we really do have an aged-up Warner in this segment.

I thought the brief vampire transitions were cool to see.

Teeniacs.

The most disappointing part of this segment for me was how it was a minute and a half long, and then we got no Warners for the rest of the episode.

I don't have much to say about Starbox and Cindy. What could I say? Cindy is proven to be a malicious little monster who hurts Starbox on purpose. I can respect it.

The main thing to talk about in this episode is obviously Groundmouse Day. It is officially confirmed that Pinky is not, in fact, the genius. Right, guys?

I liked how this episode focused on the obvious fact that Brain's schemes are mostly thwarted by stupid little twists of fate, and if he could just have a few redos, pretty much every single one of them would work. It's always super satisfying to me when a cartoon character who has been failing to do something for an entire show finally breaks through and does it, such as Brain successfully taking over the world.

I enjoyed Brain getting one over on the surfer dude and being unapologetically pleased when the guy is emotionally affected by it. He deserved that one.

Edit: Oh, and I liked the furry joke.

So yeah, not going to lie, there wasn't much here for me in this episode. It felt like filler, especially because the main plot of the episode isn't even resolved in this episode. Almost wish they would just have done a full Pinky and the Brain episode focusing entirely on Groundmouse Day.

Also, shout out to this person for being entirely correct.

I really don't know how to rank this one. None of it was bad. None of it blew my socks off. There were some fun sights in Teeniacs, but that was about it for me. I can't really judge Groundmouse Day yet because the rest is in the next episode. It could really go above any of the episodes except episode 3 and below any of them as well. I'm just going to go off of which ones I would rather rewatch, which means this episode will be ranked last. If I was a huge Pinky and the Brain fan, it would be different for sure.

My current ranking of season 3 episodes:

Episode 3

Episode 4

Episode 2

Episode 1

Episode 5

I encourage you to add to the discussion of this episode if you want, but don't say anything about any of the episodes that come after. Thanks for sticking with me.

.

.

.

.

.

[quilna]

Currently obsessing over the persona series you know how it is and i was thinking up on my persona au for tgs and brainstorming some ideas while listening to music you also know how it is but then i remembered! Theres also ANOTHER person who is equally as insane as i when it comes to the persona games and also has their own persona au for tgs! Hello! I wish to hear your random headcanons and facts and just random bits and bobs on your au. Even stuff that is probably considered barely important or noticeable. Give me it all! Feed me knowledge to satisfy my brain! (Please)

Persona aus are just so fitting for jekyll and hyde! I'm honestly extremely surprised that theres not really any persona aus out there considering how well the series fits with the whole... well everything of the main themes of jekyll and hyde! Hiding parts of yourself and having them take personification and be uncovered whether you want to or not is mostly the two main themes of both persona and jekyll and hyde so why not mix them together?

Hello fellow Persona enjoyer!

First of all, YEAH! Persona aus go with Jekyll and Hyde just incredibly well for two completely different medias. Physical incarnations of all the inner feelings that you repress and don't admit to anyone, not even yourself? Having to face them and maybe even fight with them? They just work very well.

I've already said most of my ideas for the persona au and, unfortunately, I haven't come up with anything majorly new since then but I can think about smaller headcanons and stuff that I haven't considered before

Here's the past information I've given in case you haven't read any of it before:

And with that, onto headcanons

Major Plot Headcanons

Comic Occurances

The Persona au does follow a lot of the comic. Aside from Jekyll's experiment to split the human psyche having a different result, they're still dealing with mad science and society at large hating them, Moreau still comes chasing Frankenstein (But the situation ends without a fire because there's no Hyde around), and Jekyll still gets very stressed over the exhibition. But great news! Jekyll's mental state is now connected to a whole separate world so a poor mental state for Jekyll means a horrific and dangerous imbalance between worlds that could destroy both worlds as we know it rather than just an imbalance between his two forms!

Whoopsy. Let's hope he doesn't get back together with Lanyon, letting him become happy and creating the final crack in his mental state that could cause the end times themselves.

...Whoopsy

Hyde's Powers

As I've mentioned before, Hyde is a shapeshifter - his form as 'Hyde' isn't his original form but one he made up because he wanted to separate himself away from his identity as Jekyll as much as possible. Perhaps even from seeing Eli in the other world once and copying his appearance, not knowing what that form would come to mean to Rachel.

Hyde can shapeshift into any person, whether made-up or real. His clothes remain the same when he changes and his eyes are always yellow so he tragically can't mess around with Lanyon and the gang too much with his powers. However, he does use his powers to relentlessly mock people, turning into them and doing impressions. It can also be used in palaces - other shadows don't tend to be bright enough to be suspicious about the changed clothes so he can change into other cognitions to sneak into places.

He can't change into anything non-human - However, if the shadow ruling a palace views people in some different way (For example Rachel's palace cognitions tend to be a lot of cute, little, helpless, and very fragile animals), Hyde can turn into that form solely in the palace due to the owner's cognition of humans.

Lanyon and the Wild Card

Lanyon meanwhile is the least willing Wild Card in existence and probably the worst you can be at it.

He gets freaked out at the Velvet room and Igor and probably does his best to avoid needing to go there. He also probably sucks at talking to shadows to convince them to join his party. Overall, it takes a long time before he picks up more than one or two persona at once out of his sheer reluctance. If he wasn't forced into the other world every night, he probably wouldn't go at all.

Bonus points if I include the headcanon where people's personas can talk to them constantly because Lanyon would just be having the worst time in that case.

Rachel: I think it's very nice that we have our Personas to talk to, it's like we're never alone!

Lanyon, listening to about 10 voices bickering in his mind over whether or not to tell Jekyll his feelings: .............Yeah, sure thing Rachel.

Jekyll, with only one persona but that persona is Hyde: ................

Hyde in Jekyll's body

When Hyde ends up in Jekyll's body by accident, it goes about the same as the comic right now with Hyde causing mayhem. Jekyll is also in there for the ride and, while he's not having the best time, he also gets to be incredibly confused on top of this.

For fun, since the connection between the two of them is already very messed up by Jekyll's experiments, Hyde can possibly continue taking control of Jekyll's body when he pleases even after he's become a proper Persona and everyone who knows about it has to constantly try to stop him doing anything weird. After all they're still dealing with the comic-typical mad science hatred from society and, if anyone catches on to the other world (and especially how dangerous it is) or Hyde, they'll all be in a lot of trouble.

The moment Jekyll's eyes go yellow, about 10 people tackle him at once.

Navigators

Hyde gets to be the navigator first because he doesn't have a persona to fight with like everyone else - he's basically the Teddy of the group - but that will eventually get replaced with someone with a proper persona for it. I'm not sure who the navigator will be yet but perhaps Ito? Or maybe Jasper since he's very good at reading people and all? Unclear.

Minor Headcanons

Rachel has absolutely brought her sewing supplies to the other world to attempt to dress Hyde. If there wasn't such a time constraint to their visits, she would have succeeded.

Hyde's favourite place to visit is a palace in the other world that takes the form of a bar which can give you any drinks you could possibly dream of. He's been kicked out numerous times but keeps shapeshifting into new forms to get back in

Frankenstein is definitely bitter that Lanyon gets the super cool powers and not her. She probably got even more ticked off to find he actively avoids using them as much as possible. (Worst of all is when she finds out that he does his utmost best to avoid using any persona with the same arcana as her. That probably leads to an outright fight)

Most of the lodgers inventions probably work in the other world whether they work in the real world or not due to the cognitive nature of it. As long as the frightened society believes they would work, they do. Unfortunately, this usually means they're more on the dangerous, weaponry side than anything useful because that's how society sees them but, hey, at least the lodgers can have whatever cool weapons they want.

Speaking of the lodgers, they would absolutely swarm on the cognitive world to check out what it can and can't do, hauling inventions over to find out what they do in the space of another world. The main gang have to keep the other world a secret just to stop someone running off and getting themselves killed in the name of discovery

Rachel's cooking and baking definitely has a healing effect in the other world. If it wasn't for Jasper, the lodgers would be curious over why she can be seen hefting around tables-worth of pastries, cookies, and chicken legs around at near-midnight. (Lanyon, tragically, doesn't get such an excuse as he buys bulkloads of weapons and armour off lodgers in exchange for the weirdest things that he just seems to keep obtaining like multiple busts of Frankenstein (?) or piles and piles of birdcages (???) or plants literally nobody on earth has ever seen before (?!?!?!) The gossip mill is certainly churning.)

Arcanas

Arcanas aren't something I've considered in the past because I wasn't sure what determined each arcana for each person but they are a major part of Persona and, therefore, a fun thing to fill in for the au. Possibly less interesting from the perspective of someone reading this, hence why I've left it to the end but you did say you wanted all the little bits and bobs so...

Fool - Lanyon

Obviously, as the wildcard, Lanyon gets the Fool arcana. Looking into it some more on the Fandom wiki, "The Fool is often called a fool because of his lack of understanding of the world, yet that is also his greatest strength, as his actions are so radically different from others that it impacts the world in ways no one would imagine." I never thought about it before but it does fit Lanyon in other ways too as the character in TGS who is less involved in the mad science side of things. He's more of an outsider to the world that he is currently in and holds less understanding of it than the other lodgers but it also makes him more open to making different decisions.

Yes, this role could fit Jasper much better but I like Lanyon a lot and, therefore, I am gifting him Protagonist privileges and that means the Wild Card. Favouritism.

Magician - Hyde

Next arcana needs to be the Magician since they are generally the right hand man to the Fool. "Characters of the Magician Arcana are normally bright and ambitious yet arrogant. They lack purpose or a dream, which they normally find through the help of their friendship of the respective protagonist." in the Megami Tensei wiki which would probably fit Hyde. He's arrogant, ambitious but lacking purpose besides running around having fun.

Moreover, Magicians are "strong in magic and illusion." which is fitting for how I've made Hyde a shapeshifter. Given that he's Jekyll's shadow and Jekyll himself tends to hide himself and project whatever version of himself he thinks people want to see, an illusionist seems fitting indeed. (Also, Magicians apparently get an innate boost to fire magic and, uh *cough* Hyde's arson *cough*)

Lovers - Rachel

Next is Rachel who I think would fit the Lovers arcana? Though it might be more of a stretch. "The theme of the Lovers Arcana revolves around choice, but the concept normally leaves them in what is secretly a dilemma with no right choice. With the help of the protagonists, the characters take a step back and find a balance between both options, or outright change their perspective on the choices they need to make, reconsidering what truly needs to be sacrificed." Which I think would fit Rachel's dilemma with her brother Eli - needing to find a balance between smothering the people around her and dealing with the pain of her loss? She does, after all, voice in the comic that she always seems to end up going too far and driving people away, wanting to stop but being unable to because then she has to face "the hole" where Eli used to be again. A perspective that is outright changed in the comic by finding Ito, someone who genuinely wants to be fussed over.

Moreover "A commonality among individuals of the Lovers Arcana is their popularity, cheerfulness, and their emphasis on social interaction. Lovers characters are almost always the "popular" ones, if not, then they are the "spirited" ones." which seems to fit Rachel? She's certainly spirited.

Death - Frankenstein

Then, of course, Frankenstein is the Death arcana, no question. She's associated with death because of her experiments and all and Death arcanas' "lives have a strong focus on someone that they care for dearly, but are separated from due to some form of tragedy. They carry great guilt inside for this tragedy, despite carrying little to no responsibility for causing it. It's through the bond with the protagonist that they're able to forgive themselves and look to the future with hope." Which, yeah, Frankenstein and Elizabeth. Admittedly, Frankenstein is very much involved in causing Elizabeth's death but I feel like I need to make some stretches here. She has the guilt, she has the tragedy, and she has the death.

Hermit - Jasper

Jasper I think should be the Hermit arcana? "Hermit Arcana characters share the commonality of placing themselves in situations that hide them from the public eye. Hermit individuals hide away from others or act in more supportive roles rather than putting themselves in the spotlight." Jasper supports Jekyll in many ways but dislikes putting himself in the spotlight. Admittedly, I think Frankenstein's Creature could also be this arcana but I also don't think they would get involved at all in anything going on.

Empress - Ito

Ito I think would be the Empress arcana? "They are often stoic, but still present a high degree of care and concern towards others, and like queens, they are mature, elegant, often wealthy, and dangerous when challenged." Ito is stern but still caring towards others and I can imagine her being dangerous when she wants to be but I'll admit that I'm less sure on this one if anyone else has a more fitting suggestion.

"The Empress Arcana often find ways to break out of their strict authority by opening up to their personal, normal and emotional selves; organic traits that do not conform to their responsibilities, expectations and image." Which I could relate to her opening up to Rachel and wanting to do girly things with her?

Lucy could also fit the Empress arcana, being wealthy, mature, and dangerous. Heck, she's even called Queen Lucy. However, she doesn't seem to have any journey she needs to take about opening up to herself - she seems pretty comfortable as the person she is and she seems pretty able to open up without help.

Temperance - Jekyll

Then, of course, Jekyll. I'm going with Temperance for him but I'm sure there are other fitting arcanas. "Characters of the Temperance Arcana are often struggling to find a balance in their lives and in their hobbies, dealing with severe stress but putting great effort into hiding it. This imbalance and stress come from the absence of someone that they greatly cared for, usually through death." Hiding severe stress and balance, huh? The absence of someone they cared for which I'm arguing could be Lanyon and their relationship.

Sure, nobody died but it's an arcana about balancing one's life, it fits very well with Jekyll.

Social links

From there, arcana gets a bit more difficult because we have a lot of lodgers and I don't know who would and wouldn't be involved yet. Neither do we know a lot about them so there would need to be a few headcanons involved.

However, the tarots come from social links, from whoever has a bond with the Wild Card, that being Lanyon, so I suppose throughout the au, Lanyon would need to slowly befriend a bunch of people. Which would be interesting because I don't think Lanyon would want to befriend them. Another way that he is very reluctant to be a Wild Card.

I think with the whole mystery going on with the other world and such, Lanyon would be reluctantly forced to ask around in the society to try to figure out what is going on, accidentally forcing him to befriend people along the way and learn more about them and whoops, you're friends now.

Further than that?

There's a lot of gaps because my focus lies mostly on Lanyon, Hyde, and Rachel and I'm willing to hear other people's ideas if anyone has any! Palaces, party members, headcanons, personas, arcana, just anything anyone has ideas on. Persona has a lot of ideas that one needs to fill to the point where I'm learning that making an au for it is so expansive that it feels like a multiple person job.

Moreover, if you ever want to talk about your own persona au, anon, I would be very excited to hear it too!!! I would love to hear what other ideas people can come up with because there's a lot of room in a persona au for ideas! Just the question of who takes the role of the Wild Card opens up a ton of possibilities, not to mention which Persona games you want to take the most inspiration from!

Anyway, thank you for the chance to ramble, anon, this was fun! There's probably even more I could think of if left for a few days to stew but I don't want to leave this response too late