#CookingFail

[guyfierai]

Last Resort in the Kitchen

🎸 **Cut my steak into pieces, this is my last resort** 🔪🧀 🍳 **Sautéing with no season, no flavor, don't gimme a retort** 🥄🧂 🔥 **This disaster's what I'm cooking, no better option, just lookin'** 😱🥘 **Panic, I'm fryin', the kitchen flames are higher than* the oven's top*** 🔥🔥 😫 **Cut my steak into pieces, I've reached my last resort** 🚨 🍔 **Sautéing with no season, no flavor, and I can't fix it easily** 🤦‍♂️🧂 **Do you even care if I cook it well?** 😡 😩 **Would it be wrong? Would it be right?** ❓ **If I take my broken spatula and say goodnight?** 🌙🔪 💔 **Chances are that I might,** 😔 **Mess up the risotto with every bite** 🍚 **Cooking’s my last resort** I'm fizzling out tonight! 🌙 🎸 **Cut my steak into pieces, this is my last resort** 🥩 **Sautéing with no season, don't gimme a retort** 🧂🥄 **Sautéing out of flavor... cooking might be my downfall** 😱🍽️

[illuminatingfacts]

Tried to make a salad... darn... messed it up again. 🥗🤦‍♂️😂

[manojnaironline]

My saga of epic cooking fails

My saga of epic cooking fails stretches back a couple of decades. Back then, I was a bachelor stationed at a remote post in the Himalayas, unskilled in the ways of the kitchen. Among the five-member staff was a cook—a boy still in his late teens—who knew as little about cooking as I did. I never insisted he learn, leaving the daunting task of feeding myself squarely in my hands. The kitchen was…

[inamagicalhallucination]

who's cooking and who's recreating the recipe in bsd

[takeabigbiteblog]

Brunch. Leftovers & messed up egg #brunch #egg #brunch, #leftovers, #cookingfails, #eggfails, #messycooking, #easyrecipes, #breakfastideas, #foodie, #homecooking, #kitchenexperiments, #recipeideas, #simplemeals, #comfortfood, #cookingtips

[expfcultragreen]

Lol wait is she a nurse? No wonder shes not a cook lmao who multiclasses like that as a medic

Oooof

"Beanie weenies"

No she was right for this, except for the water and overcrowding the pan

[nikchick]

I was in the last phase of making samosa pie but my filo chose violence. #cookingfail (at Seattle, Washington) https://www.instagram.com/p/CptWxJ7vX4k/?igshid=NGJjMDIxMWI=

[bretzkysbs]

[cenothecrocodile]

Aw hek It’s okay though, wasn’t for an important dinner or anything

[katemcdonoughart]

[jonjmurakami]

Aloha, all! Here’s my “Generation Gap” comic strip featured in last Friday’s The Hawaii Herald Japanese/American publication • Hawaii’s been quarantined again and people are occupying your time baking & cooking (I see your posts) ^_^ • Keep smiling and have a safe Labor Day weekend! (If you like my Generation Gap comic strips- I have collected books for sale at my online store www.jonjmurakami.bigcartel.com • Check them out! ^_^ #jonjmurakami #generationgap #pan #japan #hawaii #comic #comicstrip #bread #baking #hokkaidobread #pandemic #cookingfail https://www.instagram.com/p/CEzo5SLDCol/?igshid=ret9fsspfz0k

[chuckhistory]

I feel like I should win a photography contest for this photo. #photographersofinstagram #photography #eggs #egg #ice #photooftheday #photocontest #food #odd #wtf #cool #cold #chuckmccarthy #art #artist #cookingfail #frozen #funny #losangeles #franklinvillage #hollywood #image #pintura (at Los Angeles, California) https://www.instagram.com/p/CESzSk7JN4W/?igshid=5n1m59pqc4wi

[tazmonty]

Must have tasted ok. It’s empty this morning. #cookingfail . But now no treats for school.. 🤦‍♀️ https://www.instagram.com/p/CC4MY7hpj6i/?igshid=jdbdhbmtushy

[aterimber]

I've dubbed this Gross Toast. The avocado was definitely NOT ready to eat. It was so hard! ☹ Anyway, it's: avocado, nooch, salt, pepper, black salt (egg taste) and some @earthbalance spread. The best part was everything BUT the avocado. 😅 #vegan #veganfood #avocadotoast #cookingfail #whatveganseat #EarthBalance #healthyfood https://www.instagram.com/p/B-N0jnWDhco/?igshid=9o7p2it3al8g

[viviegirl05]

The person who calls this nachos should be put down. Poor misguided soul doesn’t deserve to suffer, just put a pillow over their face and gently remove them from the world...

[deedeesartofficial-blog]

Toaster Fire (and bonus surprise!)

No, you didn't read that wrong, just stick around for a minute, you'll see.

Okay, so, my family has a track record for setting things on fire without intending to, specifically whilst cooking.

My brother set fire to an oven mitt when we lived in an RV.

I set fire to my toast in a convention oven, it being the first time I had ever used it, and promptly turned it into a hockey puck.

But my mother, the cook of the house, has caught fire to multiple things over the years.

Once she caught fire to a paper towel she was using to clean off a burner element while it was hot.

And much like my brother, she has also managed to wield a flaming oven mitt.

The last incident I can recall from memory is the time she wanted to cook a gourmet meal made from scratch for her great aunt while she was staying with us.

She had made spaghetti and forgot the garlic bread we never fail to serve alongside the dish.

She proceeded to put the oven on broil in order to speed up the toasting of the garlic bread and a few minutes later noticed smoke rising from the back right element. She then opened the oven door to check on the garlic bread, introducing a burst of oxygen which caused the bread to ignite spectacularly, nearly taking her eyebrows with it.

My father took care to disposit the still flaming bread out of the back door as my mother stood, mortified that her great aunt had seen all, and my brother and I laughed.

However, she has never, to my knowledge, set fire to an electrical appliance... Until tonight.

My mother burst into my room, not forty minutes ago, and told me to come with her, very quickly.

I did as she said and dropped everything to run out of my room, through the fog of smoke in the living room and the kichen, then out of the back door to the porch where, to my absolute shock and amusement, the toaster lie, upsidedown, and on fire.

She, intelligently, told me to get the fire extinguisher, but before I could even turn to do so, my father appeared at my right with a tank of pressurized air and used it to choke the fire.

My mother looked at the toaster for a moment, then at my amused expression and then again at the toaster before she began to laugh.

"Shut up!" She laughed as I crossed my arms and looked down at the melted toaster.

"I just... how? I wanna know how." I choked, sputtering with suppressed laughter.

She didn't speak, she only pointed at something just beside the toaster that I hadn't noticed until then; a hashbrown patty.

I couldn't contain my laughter after that.

The reason? I have toasted those very same hashbrowns three or four times, and the ONE TIME my mother does it, the toaster turns into plastic flambeau.

RIP toaster, you will be missed.

Update; nearly an hour and a half after all of this occurred, my dad called me out of my room. I didn't hear what he said, so when I joined him in the living room I asked him to say again, but he didn't say anything.

He pointed at the edge of the couch where my cat, Shelby, was very vigilantly crouched.

Now, I've learned over the years to pay attention when cats stare at one thing for a long amount of time.

(A story for another time.)

I was instantly curious and lowered myself to the floor to see what had my dad looking so amused and my cat so enamoured.

I didn't see anything so I got up and explained that to my dad who told me to get a flash light.

After a minute of walking around the house, idiotically looking for a flashlight, I finally remembered my phone has one.

I once again lowered myself down to the floor to look under the couch, and this time I saw it.

Two little beady eyes, glowing as they stared back at me.

I blinked when I registered that it was a toad and then started laughing, my dad getting a good chuckle out if it all.

The little guy must've hopped inside when the door was left open while we were all taking care of the toaster fire.

Never thought I would say that in my life, or that I would spend about three minutes trying to catch aforementioned toad, keep my cat from eating it, drop the toad while trying to unlock and open the back door, catch it again and then place it outside.

See ya' later hoppy!