#Dale’s wondering why the fuck they even call these meetings

[woundedheartwithin]

Everybody lives nobody dies AU where Akito and Mari are part of the team and the team gets a new office because they deserve it

linktree

[wack-ashimself]

Odd, off-skelter, dark humor, gore.

That is 'Psycho Goreman.' 2020.

Before I dive I want to say the lead kid was the single most easy to hate kid I think I've ever seen in anything. YOU ARE SUPPOSED TO HATE HER AND YOU FUCKING DO. I was seriously, deep in thought thinking 'what starring kid has ever fucking annoyed me this much?' And all I could come up with was Home Alone (he's kinda a prick).

Movie is about a little girl, who is a sociopathatic, narcissistic, bullying, annoying, loud, judgemental little fuck head who (I don't care: spoilers) is still the same piece of shit at the end of the movie. She learns fuck all.

HOWEVER, she was written that way, and acted perfectly. Like, the casting of this movie worked so well, I wouldn't replace a single actor even with a-list stars. Serious. PERFECT CASTING FOR EVERY ROLE. Can't say that about even some of your fav movies, ya know?

See-weird/odd/stupid humor is hard to do. You tread that line of suspension of belief SO-GOD-DAMN-HARD, that if you tread over it too much, you lose the audience. Cuz it's what I like to call 'weird for weird's sake.' You try to be weird to be weird; not make a point or even be artistic. It's like art for art's sake; are you making a point by not making a point?

ANYWAYS, they do that AND make it a GOREY (not in a really believable way) goofy playful dark comedy? AND IT ALL WORKS? That takes...one big team effort. Kudos. Like could you imagine if they fucked up one special effect, and it took HOURS to reset?

So the little fucker I was talking about gets a gem that controls an evil demon alien god. And cuz she's a little fucker, she hurts a lot of people, intentionally and unintentionally. The whole movie is 'I wonder if a kid who DEFINITELY needs therapy and military school got the powers to control a god?' And it goes to shit as fast as you would think.

I ain't gonna say anything else plot wise. Because it is equal parts semi unpredictable, and TOTALLY BONKERS RANDOM at some points; it's worth the whole ride.

I just wanted to end before I gave the verdict that the special effects, ESPECIALLY on the budget they had, were some of the best I have ever seen. Cuz they're almost all practical; and that's a lot of fucking hands on work. It was FUN to watch the special effects. The alien council alone was so detailed when, for how little scenes they had, they didn't have to be. I respect that extra effort. And I am not into gore or horror at all. Only thing is it sometimes sucked cuz they edited so fast, you didn't get to truly soak it in.

So if you want a fucking weird, surreal, dark, playful (I say that cuz the kids invent their own fucking game. That's creative), gory horror comedy, this is for you. Closest I could say it's like? 'Dale & Tucker vs Evil' meets 'John Dies at the End.' So if you liked those two, I almost promise this is up your alley.

Psycho Goreman: 8/10. Solid movie, worth multiple watches. Just some of the best comedy was at the beginning, so a few scenes drag at the end.

ps-fav part? I was gonna say how everyone swears without swearing (frig), but I would say...the ending. Not gonna tell you why, but...it's so over the top, it works. IT WORKS. Remember above how I said it drags past mid way? The ending makes it worth it.

[timptoe]

As the Revel Meets the Day

And this is the second piece, which I wrote in less than a week. Four times someone sees Shepard in pain, and one time Shepard finally, finally has peace.

Because sometimes, even during the longest night of the longest year, you get a glimpse of the light returning.

Read it on Ao3.

--

let me die, let me drown lay my bones in the ground I will still come around  when the time for sleep is through

over hill, over dale through the valley and vale do not weep, do not wail I am coming home to you  - The Oh Hellos, “Thus Always to Tyrants”

—

pain

awful, excruciating pain

why

why can I feel pain

I shouldn’t be here

I should be done

I made the choice

a choice between three, but not a choice 

not really

only one option, pull the gun, fire at the weak point blow the whole thing to hell blow all of them to hell for us for them for him

Kaidan

I’m here

Kaidan

—-

He grunts as the bulkhead in front of them collapses forward. “That was too easy,” he mutters into his comm.

“Commander Bailey, what is that?” comes the low, terrified voice of the kid on his flank. Not a soldier, not even an adult, just a teenager he’d found huddled in a corner of the Presidium when the Reapers invaded. One of the few survivors he’d managed to hide in a burned-out storefront while the Reapers transported the whole goddamn Citadel to Earth. 

Earth. He can see it up there, in the cracks—the chasms—in the ceiling above his head. The automatic mass effect fields  are holding the air in for now, but he’s got no idea how long that’s gonna be for, not since that wave of red energy burst through the Citadel and fried anything with an on switch, from the internal communications array to his gun’s targeting computer to the fucking keepers. 

But not everything electrical. Not the mass effect fields automatically keeping gravity constant and the atmosphere stable. Not the helmets he and the kid are wearing on the off chance the atmosphere becomes unstable. And not the display screens all around the station, every one of which had started displaying the same message in the instant before the red wave swept through.

FIND HIM. And a set of coordinates.

“That,” Bailey says, answering the kid’s question, “is what we’re looking for. I think.”

It’s a pile of rubble, but it’s not. He’s no expert, but even with just a glance he can see that the tech half-buried amongst the twisted metal and sheared polymers is far, far beyond anything he’s ever seen on the Citadel or in any Alliance installation. He can’t even begin to guess what some of those pieces do, or even what material they’re made of. And really, he doesn’t care.

FIND HIM.

Somebody needs to be found.

“Alright folks,” he calls into his comm, gesturing to the gathered team behind him, “just like the last two times.”

Getting to this part of the Citadel was no mean feat. Along the way, they’d encountered more than a dozen other survivors who’d somehow survived the Reaper invasion, some of them drawn this direction by the message on the screens, others needing to rescued from rubble just like this.

Well. Not just like this.

But rubble’s rubble, and the team seems just as determined as Bailey to figure out what that final, unblinking message means. So they go to work.

It’s hours of digging. Hours of moving massive pieces of who-the-hell-knows-what. Hours of breaks, working in shifts, wondering out loud what that red wave was, why all the Reaper troops they encountered on the way were dead, why the Reaper ships they can just barely see through the chasms in the ceiling seem to be just floating derelicts, who it is that’s waiting under the rubble. Hours.

Until the moment comes.

“Commander, I think I found something!” the kid yells into his comm. Immediately, Bailey’s on his feet and running, lead in the pit of his stomach. He stops where the kid’s crouched, struggling to pull part of a bulkhead up.

Up and off of a pair of N7 greaves.

Bailey’s heart stops for the barest of moments. Holy shit. Then he bellows, “Over here!”

In seconds, dozens of hands have joined his and the kid’s, clutching at the bulkhead, lifting it carefully, revealing more of the buried figure. Precious seconds tick by as more of the rubble is cleared, more of the body is revealed, legs crushed but held together by state-of-the-art armor, chestplate all but melted away, bits of metal fused to the skin underneath but moving—somehow moving—with labored breath. The unmistakable red stripe on the right pauldron. The face, bruised and bloodied almost beyond recognition. Except for the single, piercing blue eye that locks onto Bailey.

“How…” Bailey says breathlessly.

“Who is it, Commander?” the kid asks.

Bailey kneels down next to the figure, gently takes his broken hand, feels the fingers weakly grip his. Something stirs within him, an emotion he doesn’t dare name, something he hasn’t felt since the Reapers took Earth. 

Maybe it’s gonna be alright.

He squeezes back and whispers, “It’s Shepard.”

Read the rest on Ao3.

[nysocboy]

Gemstones Episode 1.4: Keefe looks for love in a sports bar, and Kelvin meets a girl

 

Episode 1.4 is pivotal to the Kelvin-Keefe relationship, establishing that they both are gay, and that they have similar life goals: treated as babies in their subcultures, they long to prove themselves men.

Title: "Wicked Lips," from Proverbs 17.4: "An evildoer listens to wicked lips, and a liar gives ear to a mischievous tongue."  I wonder who will be listening to wicked lips.

The Satanists:  Keefe is walking through downtown Charleston, eating an ice cream cone -- a childlike activity, maybe signifying that he has been "born again," started life anew.  He had to give up his old Satanist friends and lovers to follow Christ, and now he's looking for new friends -- and a boyfriend (he does not yet think of Kelvin as a potential partner).

He looks longingly at a hot guy through the window of a sports bar (it's Kyle Walsh, who has been Adam Devine's assistant  in 10 of his movies and tv shows).  Then the hot guy turns around, stares at Keefe, and licks through a v-symbol: a vulgar offer of oral sex, usually aimed at a woman, but apparently aimed at Keefe).  Offenderd, Keefe moves on.

Next Keefe runs into his old Satanist buds, especially Daedalus and Cryptocore (who wears a gas mask and doesn't speak).  They heard the he was hanging out with "those Gemstone weirdos," but he denies it.  Then he refuses their invitation to a party at Club Sinister Friday night. 

"Keefe's a fucking nerd now!" Daedalus exclaims.  The slurs he uses, "nerd" and "weirdo," suggest the taunts of a high school bully rather than critiques of Christian believers.

As Keefe leaves, the Satanists demonstrate their new dance number.  They look like they are having fun; he is tempted to join them.

Fancy Nancy:  "Gay, you know..." Wait, is Amber talking about Kelvin? 

No, it's Sunday dinner at Jason's Steakhouse with major donors Dale and Gay Nancy, owners of Fancy Nancy's Chicken. They are parodies of Dan and Rhonda Cathy of the notoriously homophobic Chick-Fil-A, but let's take a closer look at those those names: Dale's wife is named "Gay," and " "Nancy," and "fancy" are long-standing homophobic slurs. The whole scene is a play on homophobic slurs, calling attention to the problems that Kelvin and Keefe will have if they come out

The Nancys' problem: their teenage daughter Dot is on the wrong path, hanging out with an older, decadent boyfriend -- so they won't let her use the family helicopter anymore.  Everybody volunteers to intervene, but Eli notes that Kelvin is the Youth Minister, so he should do it.  He is thrilled: a way to earn his Daddy's respect! 

Script problem: Shouldn't it be Kelvin's job by default?  Why is there even a question? This seems to be a holdover from an earlier draft, when Dot was older. 

Gay slur: Angry at being passed over for the job, Jesse criticizes Kelvin's glasses: "You look like Jeffrey Dahmer."  The gay serial killer.  Kelvin takes the glasses off.

What happened in Atlanta: We cut to Chad's wife Mandy telling the ladies that she broke into his email and found a message he received from Jesse last March: "Atlanta was dirty, dirty, for sure-y!" Other emails describe "titties," suggest getting tested, and ask how much he owes for the prostitutes. 

Amber insists that it's none of their business. There are any number of innocent explanations.  Later, she confronts Jesse, who gets mad at Mandy "for lying." 

Timeline note: This episode takes place shortly before Easter 2022, which fell on April 17th.  Mandy probably means March 2021, or she would have said "last month." So about a year has passed since Jesse's sex-and-drugs party.

The Semen Load: At the Nancy Estate, Kelvin announces that he and Keefe will be performing a Satanic Sweep  (Keefe demonstrates by sweeping at his crotch.  Satanic sweeps are about sex.)

Keefe connection: Jade Pettyjohn (Dot) starred with Tony Cavalero in School of Rock.

In Dot's room, they destroy: posters of the dark metal groups Bauhaus and Ministry; an ashtray; a "fidget spinner" (toy) that almost hypnotizes Keefe; two Ken dolls (used for gay play?); and a used condom. They bring everything out to their SCU (Spiritual Collections Unit) trailer.  Lots of questions here: did they get a whole Satanic Sweep system started in just the few weeks since Keefe was saved (converted)?  Wouldn't a real Satanist know that those so-called Satanic influences are bogus?  And why are the Satanic Sweeps never mentioned again?  

Keefe apologizes for displaying the used condom; Kelvin advises him that if it contains a semen-load, "don't even touch it."  This queasiness about touching semen appears again in Season 2 with Judy and Jesse.  Here Kelvin seems to be trying to steer Keefe away from his gay "lifestyle," which involved touching a lot of semen-loads.  To emphasize his heterosexual manliness, he tries to draw Keefe into a play-fight.

Suddenly Dot's boyfriend Austin (Blair Jackson) appears.  "I bet you money that was his semen-load," Keefe says.  As they are drawn instinctively to thoughts of his penis, Kelvin decides to "Snip him right out of this situation." Castration joke, har har.

The 40 Year Old Virgin:  Concerned that the Satanic Sweep had a sexual intent, Austin warns Kelvin "you go through my girl's panty drawer again, I'll whomp your ass."  He then calls Kelvin a "40-year old virgin!"  "So what?" Kelvin responds. "I made a celibacy promise."

Left and below: bonus Blair bod

If Kelvin is not lying to save face, he has a definitional problem. Protestants do not have celibacy (no sex ever); they have chastity (no sex before marriage). Evangelicals are encouraged to "be fruitful and multiply" by marrying and raising children. Ministers especially need wives.  When I was in the Nazarene Church, no unmarried man could be ordained.  Growing up, Kelvin would have been strongly discouraged from taking a vow of celibacy.  

But if he thinks that gay sex is sinful, Kelvin might take a vow of celibacy to both explain his lack of interest in women and try to avoid sex with men.  

Don't fuck it up:  After a scene where Jesse criticizes Chad for not deleting the various emails about his sexual infidelities, we cut to the garden, where Kelvin is telling his Dad Eli that Dot is "very sexual -- a lost cause."  Notice how he conflates sex and sin.  

But the Nancys are major donors, and Eli won't let him quit.  Besides, he's always saying that he's great with kids, "the Teen Whisperer."  This statement suggests that Dot was never considered a potential girlfriend for a heterosexual Kelvin.  She is always described as "a kid."  

Eli continues: "You're the baby of the family.  I've been babying you too long. This is your chance to prove yourself.  Do not fuck this up."

I thought this review was a little light, so I added photos of Blair Jackson and a random hunk to RG Beefcake and Boyfriends

[garrothromeave]

let’s talk about minecraft diaries rebirth.

and why it’s literally amazing. (warning: this will contain spoilers. lots of them. also, long post ahead.)

i think a lot of people hate mcdr because they were expecting a remake; but the point of rebirth is for jess to rewrite it. it wasn't supposed to be exactly the same.

honestly i went into mcdr with a closed mind. as an og mcd fan, i thought that this was going to suck ass and that i'd rant about how bad it was to my friends later. but actually watching it, i just... couldn't help but immediately fall in love with it.

ik im probably the only motherfucker that likes mcdr, but honestly how could i not? for one, garroth and zenix actually have personalities at the beginning. AND; the villagers? actually amazing. donna made me smile, visher made me laugh and cry, brendan was just bein as good as ever. like... i even didn't despise emmalyn with every ounce of my soul like i usually do?? the characterizations of them were GOOD, man.

and honestly, aphmau like--the way she spoke, her whole thing. it was reallyyy well done in my opinion. she was oblivious to things, but it wasn't overdone and wasn't done in a way to make her annoying. she's a very appealing character in mcdr, a main protagonist i do not mind following along with. her dynamics to the characters are really cool and all very unique.  gonna cut it here so i don’t clog y’all’s feed cuz i got a lot to say :)

the early use of aphmau’s powers was actually pretty cool as well, it also really showed how clueless aphmau really was to everything going on around her. AND UH, THE FACT THAT SHE THOUGHT THAT GARROTH FELT FAMILIAR? GOLDEN. absolutely golden.

AND GENE OH BOY, the early introduction of gene? ik a lot of people are upset about it, but god DAMN i love it so much. his role in the story is very important in original, and i cannot express how much joy this brought me learning that he was actually getting the proper attention for it. and the fact that gene and aphmau were working together?? i mean ik gene was just trying to use her to get back to the "shadow abyss" (pretty pog replacement for the nether, gg) but god DAMN i loved every moment of it. i found their dynamic to be pretty fuckin funny to be honest, would absolutely love to see more of it.

i might be biased considering gene is one of my absolute favorite characters, but i honestly think that introducing gene this early on in the story was a good move. again, he's literally the right-hand man to the shadow lord. it makes you really wonder why he didn't have as much of an important role in season 1 or even 2 of the original mcd plotline. also, we get some of that good-ol-fashioned exposition with seeing early on how vylad and gene interact. vylad’s at a very strange point in the story right now; his motives are unclear, even to the side he’s ‘supposed’ to be taking (aka, a shadow knight.)  another early introduction to a character is zane! this, my friends, is good. really good. i’d say that zane is the main antagonist of season 1 in the original series--and he wasn’t even introduced until like, episode 50. it’s not necessarily a bad thing, but him being introduced this early on really gives the audience a better understanding of what threats are out there and what our protagonist will have to encounter in the future. in the original series, there’s not much explanation as to why lords are disappearing/dying left and right--and while yes, that was supposed to be the mystery of it, having some of that early information is a better move in terms of writing. 

AND IVAN?? BEING A PART OF THE JURY OF NINE?? I COULD NOT HAVE ASKED FOR ANYTHING MORE LIKE GOD DAMN that was a very pleasant surprise i'll just say that, thank you jess :)

and no i did not loop the 4 minutes of screentime laurance got in that one episode haha who would do that i would never do that anyways

SPEAKING of laurance, im so glad jess actually wrote him in this early :) she totally could have just waited for the first time aphmau visits meteli and meets him there, but no! she put him in an early episode. i dont even care if she did it just to shut up the fans about laurance but man that made me so happy seeing him, even if it was only for a bit.

okay i kinda wanna go over the guards real fast firstly; garroth. ignoring how weird the helmet showing emotions is, i really like how garroth is portrayed. he's under a lot of pressure because the village is putting a lot of the blame on him for malik's death, and he's trying his hardest to keep things running. the fact that garroth utterly refused the to take up the position of lord and even got a little snappy about it was actually really cool to see as well. and while he doesn’t have that same “reserved, quiet, observant” feel as the original mcd version of him had, this version of garroth is absolutely awesome. he’s more direct and blunt, is significantly more sarcastic, and isn’t as stiff or as much as a pushover as he is in the original. he even has a sense of humour. also, no homo, but he’s kinda adorable.  plus, the desperation that he goes through during the whole thing is just--it’s really cool to see how hard he’s trying to prove himself and help the village. my rating for mcdr garroth? 9/10. the helmet... the helmet is the main thing throwin me off, i can’t lie. next, zenix. oh BOY do i have a lot to say about this man. first of all, his and garroth’s dynamic is incredible. when i saw how the interacted with each other, my first thought was: father and son. zenix has this immaturity to him that is so fucking fun and interesting to watch, and seeing how garroth scolds him is so fuckin good man. and! seeing how he interacts with the rest of the village... honestly, if jess ever picks this story up again, i would probably cry when zenix (literally) backstabs garroth. HELL, i hope that’s something that still happens, it’d be heartbreaking to witness this character that we’ve come to love hurting his mentor, the man who took him in. he’s just a really good character all in all, and much more appealing than the original mcd zenix. ...except season 3 zenix. no zenix can be better than that one.  either way, zenix is amazing written to be the comic relief and he’s just an all-out lovable character in this series.  finally, dale and brian. yes i’m going to group them up because there’s not much to say regarding them, but i do want to address them. for starters, we have brian; who’s already 16 when the story starts. good on jess for doing that, because in the original aphmau watched brian be born and age INCREDIBLY quick, haha. THOUGH i do feel like there’s a slight connection lost there--one of the hardest things about brian’s betrayal in the original series in the fact that we watched him grow up in phoenix drop. we were there from the moment he was born, to the second he betrayed phoenix drop. BUT OF COURSE, this version is a lot more realistic, so it’s understandable. i just think that if it’s brian who’ll be betraying phoenix drop again (if it even goes down that same route), it won’t hit as hard unless jess really takes the time to grow the connection between brian and aphmau.  as for dale; gotta admit, love it. and like, i think one of the main things about how good of a call it was to make him a drunkard from the beginning is considering how much the village is struggling. the fact that the second-in-command is literally drunk all of the time really conveys the message of, “yeah. this village needs help.” plus, he’s another good comic relief character. i loved seeing molly and dale’s relationship too, it was very funny.  PLUS. we were blessed with a well scene, in which aphmau had to help villagers out of the well. i don’t know about you guys, but that was one of my favorite nods to the original series. i cannot thank jess enough for that, there was a smile on my face the entire time. another amazing thing--visher’s character. instead of just being introduced to this quirky lil merchant who only had one or two interactions with aphmau like in the first one, we got to sit there and really get a feel for someone worth remembering and worth mourning over. we had a reason to be sad over his death, it wasn’t just some npc getting blown up suddenly. this was different, and this hurt.  one of the major things that i hope is to come out of this is for jess to fix the major mistakes she had when writing the first series. she’d expressed how unhappy she was with some of the decisions she made, and i’m glad that she’s getting that second chance to undo the things she didn’t like. this series also gives her a second chance to really, really dig into characters and their motives. like, gimme laurance backstory in better detail. or like, garroth and zane’s relationship from back when they were kids? or how vylad died and who killed him? etc etc. she’s already done an excellent job so far, and i can’t wait to see where this goes. that is, if she ever continues it. god, i wish there were more episodes so that i could seriously let you guys know how beautiful of a series this is. there’s so much i want to say about rebirth, but i think i’ll stop here. i might say some more shit about it later, but if there’s anything i’d want you to take away from this, it’s: give minecraft diaries rebirth a chance. there’s a lot of potential, and this is a chance for jess to really change things for the better! ... but again, that is if this ever is continued. 

[rachelbethhines]

Robin Hood and His Merry Band

list of characters for an original series I’m working on 

Alan-a-Dale - the gloomy and cynical bard, the grumpy voice of reason who doesn’t give a fuck, wonders why he hangs out with these crazies, knows it’s cause they’re family to him but won’t admit it out loud, besties with Friar Tuck even though they never agree on anything, is clearly a bi disaster 

The Archdeacon of Canterbury - The aging head cleric of the church of England. He supports King Richard but is becoming increasingly impotent because of his failing health. Still holds a lot of political power because of his title though.

The Azure Assassin - A deadly mercenary and rival to Robin Hood. Orphaned at a young age Azure had to steal to survive. She stowed away on a pirate ship at the age of ten and has spent the pass eight years studying fighting techniques the world over. They call her the Azure Assassin because her blue eyes are the last thing you’ll see before dying. She’s gained a modest fortune and fame as a spy and assassin, however she can never stay in one play too long due to her reputation getting out. Prince John has offered her a pardon and a place in high society if she brings in Robin Hood’s head. Shame she’s fallen in love with his brother Will Scarlet, as that complicates matters.  

The Bishop of Hereford - Conservative asshole who supports Prince John’s rule and shares his beliefs on ‘bringing order to the kingdom’. Wants to usurp the Archdeacon as the head of the church. Is Friar Tuck’s and Sister Clara’s arch nemesis.

Dame Brianna DuBois - Also known as the The Black Knight, DuBois is loyal to the throne of England and whoever sits upon it. She’s Prince John’s personal bodyguard and unbeknownst to all a double agent for King Richard who is in hiding. However she is conflicted when her duty places her lover Yua in jeopardy. Yes, she’s totally a butch lesbian.   

The Duke of Essex - Prince John’s adviser and right hand man. He only cares for power for power’s sake but is sneaky and conniving and willing to play the long game to get it. He prefers poison to swords, but is surprisingly good at hand to hand combat when cornered. Has a pet snake. It’s the only living thing that he loves.    

Elenore of England - Prince John and King Richard’s sister and Maid Marian’s mother. She died when negotiations during a worker dispute turned violent. Unable to quell the people’s rage, she was stuck down during a riot. Richard, blaming himself for losing his temper and causing things to escalate has since tried to follow in her footsteps and become peacemaker. Prince John went the opposite route and blamed the ungrateful peasants (criminals in his mind) and resented Richard for even bothering to negotiating in the first place.   

Friar Tuck - The jovial and optimistic heart of the team. He tries to keep everyone’s spirits up and believes that helping people is the ultimate expression of god’s love. Is a hopeless romantic and also very, very gay. He butts heads with more traditional leaders of the church often. He also has a not so secret crush on his best friend Alan. 

Guy of Gisbourne - From pauper to nobleman, Guy is Robin’s opposite in everyway. He crawled up from the bottom rung by using and stepping on others and he’s always looking for the opportunity to climb the ranks. Don’t let his foppish ways fool you though, he is both a cunning and ruthless foe and isn’t afraid to get his hands dirty. His latest scheme however is to marry Maid Maiden and become next in line for the throne as Prince John has no other heirs save his ward.  

King Richard - Good Richard the Lionhearted is no longer a bloodthirsty crusader in this alternate universe but a peacemaker. He wishes to end wars, not start them, however his more abrasive, uncouth, and impulsive nature can often clash with his loftier goals. Many feel the king would do better to stay at home and tend to domestic matters instead of concerning himself with the conflicts of other far off lands. At the start of the story he has disappeared on one of his diplomatic visits. In reality Prince John has stuck a deal with the king’s enemies and he is currently on the run. 

Lady Tiffany - Little John’s little wife and the daughter of the Sherriff of Nottingham. She acts as the gang’s ‘man on the inside’ helping Robin Hood sneak in and out of places and feeding the team needed information. She’s stubborn and spoiled but also very kind hearted. She usually can get her father to give into her demands with just a pout and when that doesn’t work a full on tantum will do. She a woman who knows what she wants and what she wants is her man. Unfortunately daddy dreariest would never approve of their union and so Friar Tuck marries them in secret.  

Little John - Robin’s best friend and right hand man. He’s a simple man who loves life’s simple pleasures, good food, good friends, and a good brawl from time to time. He adores his partner, Tiffany and would like nothing more than to marry her for real, in a real church, in front of the whole world. However their relationship must remained hidden from her father, the Sheriff, since the violent lawman would sooner see him hanged then have a thief for a son-in-law.  

Lord Locksley - Robin’s and Will’s father. He is arrested for ‘not paying taxes’ but in reality it’s for supporting King Richard and secretly helping the displaced monarch. His arrest leads to Robin and Will becoming outlaws and the series kicks off two years later.   

Maid Marian - Prince John’s ward and niece. Her mother died when she was young and her beloved uncle adopted her. Prince John is the only parent she’s ever known and she at first believes him to be a kind and just man. She’s completely oblivious of Prince’s John’s underhanded dealings and oppression of the poor and at first is skeptical of Robin Hood. However as the two grow closer, Marian learns how harsh the real world is and just how much her father figure has lied to her. 

Miss Yua - Maid Marian’s lady-in-waiting and best friend. She’s the daughter of Sir Ivanhoe and longs to be a knight as well. She’s a stickler for rules and doesn’t trust Robin Hood and his gang of thieves. At first anyways, over time she too learns of Prince John’s cruelty and even becomes a victim of the tyrant’s schemes. Which puts her in direct conflict with her love, Brianna DuBois.  

Much the Miller's Son - born as Midge the miller’s daughter, the young Much longs to be accepted as a boy. As such he’s ditched his dresses, cut his hair, and ran away to Sherwood Forrest in order to be free from society’s expectations. The rest of the merry band accepts Much for who he really is, but at only 13 won’t let him join their gang. He still winds up caught up in their misadventures anyways due to his refusal to listen to anybody, and his determination to get away from his overbearing mother. 

Nurse Agnes - Maid Marian’s wet nurse and the closest thing to a mother that she has. Agnes believes in the ‘old ways’ and is very superstitious. She’s also very critical of royalty in general, but is smart enough not to say so out loud. She’s tried to raise Marian into a better person than Prince John, but eventually was dismissed once Marian had come of age. Since leaving the court Agnes has become the witch of the woods and a healer for the poor. 

Prince John - The main antagonist. Prince John believes that he needs to bring order to the kingdom of England and feels like his brother King Richard has neglected his duties as ruler and placed the kingdom in danger. He'll do whatever it takes to protect the country including subjecting it’s undesirables.  

Robin Hood - Leader of the Merry Band and archer extraordinaire, Robin Hood had to go on the lam when his father was arrest for ‘treason’. While his first priority was to keep his baby brother, Will, safe, the two of them met other outcasts in need over the years have built up an underwound network of rebels who fight against Prince John’s rule. Seemingly suave and cool at first, Robin is actually a bundle of nerves as he tries desperately to keep his friends and family safe...even if it’s mostly from themselves. His world is turned upside down though when he meets the lovely Maid Marian. 

Sheriff of Nottingham - The spiteful and cruel sheriff tries to keep the small town of Nottingham under his thumb. He hates Robin Hood and his Merry Band with a passion and sees their continued exitance as a personal insult. The only thing that will deter him from his goal of putting those outlaws in their place is his devotion to his beloved daughters Tiffany. Who distracts him with her seemingly impulsive and shallow whims.   

Sir Ivanhoe - A respected knight who once served under King Richard has returned home only to find that his king has not made the journey back as planned. He suspects that Prince John is up to no good, but is afraid to make any risky moves so long as his daughter Yua lives among the court. Her safety is the most important thing in the world to him. 

Sister Clara - The resident nerd of Sherwood Forrest and the brains of the team. Clara had joined a convent in order to receive an education and to study science, however her experiments were frowned upon by more traditional leaders of the church, like the Bishop of Hereford. She’s since renounced her monastic vows and has joined Robin Hood’s Merry Band in the pursuit of science! She’s allowed free rein on the sole condition that she doesn’t blow up the camp.  She still manages to blow up the camp, at least once a month. Still her inventions are invaluable to the team and she’s absolutely feral with her chim-bombs.  

The Trapper - A mysterious hermit who sometimes visits the local pub. He’ll often corner patrons with crazy drunken ramblings and loves to give Robin cryptic prophecies and disjoined ‘clues’ whenever they run into each other. (turns out this is an act and he’s really a spy for King Richard)

Will Scarlett - Robin’s younger brother. Will was 15 when they lost their father and now at 17 wants revenge. He’s a hothead and is constantly picking fights with everyone and anyone. While he is dismissive of Robin’s overprotectiveness, he both loves and admires his brother. Even tries to emulate him in some ways. He also would like to think of himself as a smooth talking clever con artist and ladies man but more often then not his temper gets the better of him. Like most teens he’s obsessed with the latest fashion tends and loves to wear fancy clothes (that he’s usually stolen) He’s favorite article of clothing is his impractical red feathered hat. He’s in love with Azure and is best friends with Much. 

[hs-devote]

18. E X C L A M A T I O N

Moodboard // Content // Masterlist

Disclaimer:

All characters and situation in this story are fictitious. Resemblance to any person living or dead is only God knows.

Previous chapter;

It took a few moments for Y/N to connected the dot. One thought came up yet she really didn't like this, “So, you said that Dale Jespersen–”

“Jaden Peesel and Randell are the same person, and he's Dale Jespersen.” 18. EXCLAMATION

Cutting someone off was rude. But, she didn't mind, for now, since she didn't think her tongue could spill whatever she was having in her head. However, what Douglas just said earlier made her blinked.

“How come?”

She tilted her head toward her boyfriend, watching Harry gave Douglas a keen look. His voice was surprisingly steady yet firm as always. His demeanour was nothing to worried about.

For now.

"Randell didn't take the payment through a bank account, the media paid him cash. Meanwhile, Dale's account was increasing high a week before the tape being published. His transaction record shows money out to Victoria's account three days since she sent the video to Jaden Peesel, and some certain amount made into his account in three consecutive days a week after the media gave the cash to Randell."

“He might look like shrewd, but he made one omission, Mr Styles.” Eric added, “Randell's signature is exactly the same with Dale Jespersen.”

Eric gave him a copy of agreement where Randell sold the video and the media must keep his identity secret. Then, gave him another one of Dale's signature.

How could Dale be smart and stupid at the same time?

“That's a stupid move if he wants to be anonymous but make an agreement like that." Roman murmured.

Douglass nodded, “Not only that, Victoria once sent a message to Dale that she succeeded to steal the tape from Ms Powell and sent it to Jaden Peesel and Randell's number. Here.”

The man gave Harry another copy transcript of the evidence, only made the CEO of Erskine furious. Y/N could tell her boyfriend now was suppressing his anger, it was clear from how hard he gripped the papers of evidence in his hand.

“Jaden Peesel and Randell are Dale Jesperson. Victoria Selley is the one who worked with him and it obvious that the two of them started this commotion."

“Fucking hell!”

Everyone flinched in their seats as Harry punch the table with his bare hand. The atmosphere felt thick and intense, no one dare to open their mouth. Y/N watched Harry lowered down his head, gripping his hair hardly and growling fumingly. Exhaling deeply, all she could do now is rubbing his back up and down to soothe him.

“But, what's the reason?" Elle cried, "Vic and I are best friends! We're good with each other!"

“At this point, Ms Powell," Allen began, "We all know Mr Styles and Dale Jespersen are eternal enemies if I could say. They haven't had a good relationship since back then. As for Victoria Selley, we don't know yet what her motive is. But, all I know is Victoria was bitter about her break up with Mr Styles."

“And now, both of them teamed up to take revenge on Harry.” Y/N mumbled, “How could they both know each other?”

“Those two are still on my list, Ms Y/L/N. After this meeting, we'll file this case immediately with all this evidence. We don't yet know their reason. However, they got arrest, we can get that answer."

All of them was mind-blowing. Never crossed her mind, someone who made this mess was the one who was always looking for trouble with Harry. Dissatisfied with the previous one, Dale now came up with a bigger issue. And to make the matters worse, he teamed up with someone she didn't think of.

“I don't know your friend is such a snake, Elle.” Sebastian sighed, “A true friend would never do that.”

“It all makes no sense. I can't believe it.” whined Elle, “We're still in touch until now for fuck sake!”

“How could you not see that, Elle. The fucking footage proves your rotten friend betrayed you. That bitch doesn't deserve to be called a friend.” Harry snarled, raising his head to stare at everyone in the room. Even though his eyes weren't on her, Y/N could feel he wasn't Harry. His persona turned 180 degrees different.

“I want that pile of shit and the cheap whore get arrested the day after tomorrow at most.” he seethed, “I don't care how much I will pay the police to quickly arrest them. I want the news of their arrest in three days. Widespread throughout the entire earth if necessary.”

Without any other words, he got up from the chair and exited the meeting room – leaving the loud bang of the door echoed in the air.

“I'll come with you. Because it's not only Mr Styles who's a disadvantage here, Ms Powell lost 30% of her contract just because of that." Roman spoke, "I believe we better go today."

“Just, just do what must be done, Allen, Mr Kane. And thanks for the hard work, also for Eric and Douglas." Y/N drew a heavy breath, "And for Elle, I'm sorry for all this mess. You're not the only one who hurt, many parties feel the impact."

“As for Harry, I believe he's unstable right now. You guys know how hard he holds his temper." she added.

“I'm sorry for that old video, Y/N. I intended nothing for keeping the video."

It felt like a dream for Elle being nice to her. Because the first time they met, Elle was uncomfortable with her. And how she was apologising about the tape, made nice progress. Y/N bit her lip before giving the woman a small smile, "It's the past we couldn't get rid of. Some of our younger behaviours are stupid, reckless, and questionable. This has all happened, so.." she shrugged, "The most important thing is, we have to quickly close this case so it doesn't get worse."

Elle frowned, “But, what stuck in my head is.. why?”

“Their reason is still mysterious, Elle. Once we meet them, we have to force them to speak.” she sighed, “No matter what.” . . . .

Some days were still needed before the files completed and submitted. At the same time, it was reported that Dale had submitted his resignation from Machtig. Even his house, which had been spied by Allen's worker, hadn't shown the slightest bit of activity during the last three days of spying.

It was no secret Harry went on a rampage. His current level of anger surpassed anything else, and it was the worst everyone have seen. It all went more and more disastrous when the client bluntly revealed the reasons for their backing out.

We couldn't work with 'someone' like you

How the hell Erskine have porn crazed man as their leader?

It would damage our image if we continued to work with Erskine

All of those made Harry almost destroy his own office. He was seeing red, the only thing he knew was a burning fire – as in his head and feelings right now. He felt like being surrounded by flames that were ready to devour him.

Erskine's stock fell dramatically, he was forced to close several branch offices that weren't profitable and resulted in laid-off his employees. This was the darkest stage in his life; never thought he would step into a black abyss like this.

Every night, Y/N would always accompany Harry on late-night meeting with the finance staffs, HR staffs, and several related divisions to calculate how much money left for Erskine could pay their employees. And it ended with them deciding which candidate to get layoff next.

This wasn't an easy task to write down the names of employees to be fired. Harry knew his soon-to-be fired employees have obligations and responsibilities of their families. However, it was the best choice and he hoped they would understand and get a better job.

How was Marcel doing?

Oh, the man loved it so much.

The anger, the stress, the betrayal burnt his emotion and let Marcel smirked in his glory. Marcel was still Marcel, with his arrogance and extremely temper. The broken door, shattering glass, and pieces of papers were his masterpiece. All the shouting and yelling were him. The office atmosphere was unpleasant and less comfortable. Even when Harry or him passed in front of the employees, everyone seemed afraid albeit in their hearts, Y/N knew they didn't like him. All they could do was stay silent rather than be his target or be the next employee to get layoff.

But, one thing surprised her. He could be a little rational when in a meeting even though a few harsh words slipped out. Hell, even he was nice enough to her.

If he barked at employees, tore their papers, slammed doors in their faces, or smashed glass to intimidate them, Marcel was never more than scowled at her – unlike their first encounter.

Of course in this kind of state, Marcel was more dominant than Harry. No wonder if Marcel was more present than her actual boyfriend. And it made her worry since it had been five days in a row Harry couldn't switch his position. Y/N had started to panic, she couldn't think of Harry wouldn't come back again.

“How's he doing?”

“Awful.” she sighed, “I don't know what to do any more, Niall.”

Since Marcel had been here long enough than Harry, and of course he missed the therapy, Y/N took initiative to meet with Niall herself – without Marcel knowing. She was sure Marcel would go mad if he found out that she secretly met Niall to fix him. Both of them now were in a coffee shop somewhere in Borough, and had been talking for half an hour – about none other than Harry Styles.

“Where is he now?”

“In his penthouse. The last time I checked he was playing FIFA when I said goodbye.”

Niall raised an eyebrow, “And Erskine?”

“We're on the most critical stage since it was founded, according to the legal team. Marcel even want to retire and sell the company for fuck sake!”

“H would smack him for that.”

“Absolutely," she nodded, "Since the client doubt Harry's performance and scoffs at our leader is a porn star – according to them, we now just have five companies remaining. And we don't know if when they will announce the back out."

“I'm sorry for that, Y/N.” Niall smiled apologetically, “God knows how strong you're guys.”

“That's why we think to change the CEO's position temporarily until Harry and Erskine are completely clean from this case.” she shrugged, “At least it may growth their trust again, while we rest Harry and help him to find his way back.”

“How did he respond that?” Niall sipped his coffee, “That's a huge step.”

“The directors and I haven't told him yet. But I think, we'll kinda lie at him. Says he definitely needs his leave while someone will take over the position. And of course, we'll lend that important seat to the rightful person."

“Do you have the name?”

“We have. But, I'll discuss this thing with his mother first. It's her late husband's company after all.”

“If I could be honest, Y/N, this is the most Marcel has been in Harry's body in consecutive days. And if we don't help him, it might get worse than we thought. I bet he threw the medicines away.” he stared at her, “Why don't you take him on holiday? It can help him to clear his mind.”

Y/N squinted her eyes, “Don't you think it's a bit risky? He'll reject it at very second.”

“From what I've heard from you, Marcel was likely growing an attachment with you." he smiled, "Which something I was surprised."

“Take the advantage and bring Harry back with us. I can't lose my best friend and we'll work together for that, Y/N.” . . . .

To Y/N dismay, Marcel rejected her offer first, said it wasn't important. Yet, she managed to persuade him and said he needed some time away to shut off this mess. She wouldn't take a risk to bring him far away from London, and her choice fell on Windermere.

The natural beauty of England's largest lake could be enjoyed directly through the cottage she rented for a week. She didn't know how many days they would need, that made her rent the contemporary property for the whole week. The house was lying on the shores of the lake, offering four bedrooms with four bathrooms also. The kitchen and dining space holding magnificent views across the lake, not to mention they had private shoreline and jetty mooring. Such a unique escape and worth the four hours drive from home.

It had been three days they were there and Harry seemed to be enjoying his rest here. The new situation and different vibes calmed him and made Marcel less frequent. Everything Harry did was cycling around the district, took a long walk, even swimming in the Lake Windermere. The lake itself was well-known as the largest and deepest in England, it made her nervous because Harry was so stubborn and insistent to do wild swimming there.

However, a few things happened and made him changed upon his return. If he left as Harry, he would back as Marcel. Like this morning, he was her Harry. But, when he got back after finished his jog, his aura was different. He was cursing all the time, ignoring her questions. And from that moment, she knew he was Marcel.

“What happened, Harry? You were fine this morning." Y/N asked her tenth question for him, didn't give up to get the answer she wanted. She knew the man who was drinking in front of her was Marcel, but if he didn't want to answer, Y/N would find it difficult to find out the case.

“That fucking asshole got on my nerves,” grunted him, “He threw his water on me. Who does he think he is?!”

She raised an eyebrow, “He threw water on you? What was the reason?”

“Like the hell I care?” he rolled his eyes, “But, I think the bloody nose will teach him the lesson.”

“Harry.” Y/N stressed her words, her legs stepping closer to him, “Did you punch him?”

“Of fucking course! What do you expect me to do? Doing nothing like an idiot?” Marcel tilted his head, “He got my face wet, and I got his nose wet. Paid off.”

Her shoulder fell off, "The wet is a different kind, Harry. But, you just punched him, right? Nothing more serious?"

“Why do you ask me like that, darling?" he smirked, "That's a bit weird. You seem don't mind me punching someone."

She gulped, feeling overwhelmed by the fact that Marcel brought his face closer. His eyes which although almost resembled Harry's, still kept her struck in the place. Albeit Marcel inhabits the body of her lover, the feeling of intimidation by someone who wasn't so familiar still made her skin tingled.

“That better than you drown him on the lake.” she murmured, yet at once she cursed her stupidity for saying like that. She had to quickly cover it before Marcel got suspicious, “I'm joking. I don't know if he was rude to you or not but I think he kinda deserved it if he had no reason to threw his water.”

“You're funny," he shook his head before pulling his face away and walked inside, "Would you fancy home-cooked meal? I'm not into a take away for today."

“Would you do the dish afterwards?" Y/N wiggled her eyebrow, looking at Marcel who was digging the shelves in the kitchen. One thing she liked about him was, he loved cooking more than Harry. Harry loved to cook, but not as often as Marcel if he was here. Marcel would almost cook every day if he was present, even though he had a rough day or his anger was on the cloud.

“Only if you clean the table beforehand.”

“Only clean the table?”

“You heard me m'lady.”

“Deal.”

. . . .

The holiday originally was for them only. But, Y/N invited Anne to come two days before their return to London. This short escape was help Harry to rest and gather his energy, as evident from Marcel that barely appeared since he admitted he punched someone's nose.

The morning was only seven straight, Harry was still sleeping safe and sound while Y/N just opened her eyes five minutes ago. His heavy arm draped her naked side tightly with his other one was folded behind his head. She brought her fingers running along his chiselled jaw, down to his lower lip and made a stop in the chin. He was so peaceful and fragile when he was sleeping, yet once he opened that damn gorgeous pair of green eyes, he would turn into a solid one.

Her memory took her back to the last night sex. She didn't lie when she said both of them were sex-crazed. They were always constantly had sex everywhere or whenever they had the chance. Either a wild one or the gentle one. Y/N also didn't understand why her intercourse activity was high, whereas previously with Elliott, she wasn't that frequent to have sex.

She drew a smile remembering how beautiful the sunset was while she moaned Harry's name. Since their bedroom had windows overlooking the lake, it was a nice addition to heeding their sex activities. The warm sunlight cast Harry's beautiful face sweating as he deepened his thrust, grunting deeply while the woman beneath him squinted her eyes in pleasure. And when they both reached their high together, the sky was already dark since the sun had gone down, their hot bodies shivered from the cold wind kissed their body.

Hell, even thinking about that made her down there throbbing nervously.

Y/N never denied that Harry was the greatest sex she ever had. His little seductive comment would always get her wet. And sometimes made her think there was something wrong with her because she was so easily aroused.

She was too busy with her own daydream to notice that Harry had opened his eyes and was watching his girlfriend stroking his cheek slowly. He intentionally didn't make the slightest sound or movement, waiting for Y/N to realise that he was awake.

“Enjoying me that much?”

The way his morning voice was raspy and thick out of his mouth, startled the girl all of sudden. Her hand jerked away from his smooth cheek, tucking it below her chin. Harry giggled of the way she blinked her eyes, before throwing the sharp look on him.

“Good morning, baby.” he snuggled closer to her neck with arms tightening around her waist, his naked fingers drawing the circle on her lower back seductively.

“Good morning, golden.”

“Golden?” raised an eyebrow, Harry gave her a questionable look while head tilted up to her. “What's golden?”

She hummed, stroking his sharp jawline playfully, “Mmhm. The way your face lit up when the ray of sunshine glistened your pretty face, it has the golden beauty, H.”

“Such an unusual nickname,” he shrugged, “But, I like the definition.”

“Glad to hear that.”

“Anyway," he sighed, placing his palm on her hip instead, "Mum will come today, right? What time will she arrive? I think we can get her from the station?"

“Around four? But, she told me earlier we don't need to pick her up since she will take a taxi to get here.”

“All right,” he yawned, “Let me stay still like this for a bit before we have breakfast.” said him before nudged his head on the crook of her shoulder, his index finger stroking her hip gently.

Harry and Y/N were silent for five minutes, didn't say a word – just enjoying the closeness to each other. She almost fell back asleep if Harry's cheeky hands went down her stomach, teasing her down there. She gulped and whined at the same time when his fingers nudged her core, playing with her clit before gone to feeling her inner thigh.

“Harry..”

“Darling..”

A frustrated sigh was coming from her mouth when Harry rolled his finger up and down her cunt, feeling the sticky and wetness of her before taking the next step that made Y/N shake. She let out a whimper when his thumb nudged her clit, moaning deeply when she felt his two fingers being pushed into her.

“My sweetheart is always wet and ready for me.” he hummed in her ear, still with his fingers pumping in and out of her, “Such a beautiful morning, yeah? Me and you, after our endless sex last night and waking up aroused and loaded.”

“Harry..” she whined, her chest rose up and down to catch the breath since she was running out of the oxygen. And all of that because how magically his fingers worked her out.

“Come for me, baby. Come in my fingers, I know you need that. Want you to clench my fingers.” muttered him while fastening his fingers' thrust on her, “Do it, darling. Do it for me.”

Harry didn't need much time for lifted his body and hovering the girl he was fingering, while he added the third finger, he leaned down to kiss her. A satisfaction smirk formed on his lips when Y/N buckled her hip and lolling her head, feeling the overwhelmed of his three fingers working on her. She cried out when her man picked up the speed, only for made her moan even more.

“Harry..”

He kissed her throat, “Such a good girl. You feel so good.”

Y/N felt that. Her stomach twisted in pleasure while she screamed out his name, feeling the high came to reach her. Harry smiled, shaking his head looking down at his wet-sticky fingers after he pulled out. Bringing them on his mouth, he licked all of them clean.

She was gasping for a breath while her eyes set off of her boyfriend who was licking her sweetness on him. Her droopy eyes stared dreamily on him, watching the way he was naked with all of his glory and his pride resting stiffly between his thick thighs. She gulped, thinking how easy for him to get horny and now, the way his length sprung confidently in front of him, she was sure they wouldn't get off this bed for another hour.

“Your cock is cocked.” she bluntly said, giving him an unbelievable look.

“Love that my baby paid attention,” he chuckled, “Thinking you can handle the loaded morning?”

“I th–”

The way Harry frowned over the ringing phone showing he was annoyed. He was about to fulfil his lust but the damn call in disturbed their morning. Y/N giggled softly when Harry moved away from the bed and stomped his footsteps, acting like an annoyed little kid.

“It's Allen." he murmured while looking at the bright screen, then exchanging a look with Y/N.

“Harry." she gave him a warning look before shaking her head – no. Along they spent the time here, both of them agreed to not picking up a work call. Whatever it was. She wanted to make this short holiday their temporary escape from work, she just wanted to unwind and forget about problems for a moment.

“This must be important." he looked at her, like he was asking permission, "Please?"

If it was Allen, something must have happened. And Harry was right; if Allen called him, he would deliver important news. And maybe, maybe it would bring some relief for both of them considering how much they were facing right now.

“Put on the speaker, I don't want you to take the news yourself."

Harry just nodded, before swiped up his screen and put his phone on the bed – leaving the speaker on. She mouthed a thank you, then focusing on what Allen would tell them.

“Allen?”

“Hello, Harry. How are you? How's the holiday?”

He stole a glance from her before shrugging his shoulder, “I'm fine, thanks. The holiday is.. amazing. What made you call me, Allen?”

“Something with the case, H.”

Again, he looked at Y/N who was also staring at him. The way they exchanged looks telling each other they didn't know what the lawyer would tell him. Y/N just nodded her head, letting her boyfriend continue.

“And.. what's that?”

“We knew we've taken this case to legal action. With all of the evidence lead to Dale Jespersen and Victoria Selley, they were being sought while this escalates the lawsuit in court. Victoria Selley has been arrested at her house, but for Dale Jespersen, they still couldn't find them." he paused, "We have a suspicion that he changed his identity. Or the worst, fled out of England."

“I thought you should know what to do, Allen." he scoffed, "Spread out his picture and activity record! Ban him for travelling overseas. Should I be the one who tells you such a simple thing like this?"

The rage on his eyes wasn't something difficult to understand, Y/N might never know what it was like if she was him for now, but she knew well the anxiety and anger flooded on him. She couldn't reprimand him who was currently yelling at his lawyer, all she did was wait for him. She flinched when he was screaming at the top of his lung at Allen when he got the dissatisfaction, only to get him angered even more. Raised her hand to try to ease him, she was flabbergasted when Harry quickly shoved her palm away – grabbing his mobile phone and walked out of their room. Y/N could no longer her Allen's voice, it seemed her boyfriend had turned off the speaker.

Harry never shied away from her, no matter what.

She didn't know what are they talking any more or how he cursed his lawyer. She would take a guess he was on the other side of the cottage, or even on the patio. But, that was impossible considering he was still naked. He didn't even take his shorts on him before walking out!

“Fucking moron!”

No, it wasn't the curse made her flinch. The way Harry slammed hard the door made her jump on the skin, along with the banging wooden table. She just prayed that Harry didn't break something here, but she had to get prepared – especially Anne would come today. She didn't want Marcel's presence today.

Should she do that?

Her phone was in her hands, but she was still hesitant to call someone she wanted to ask for help. She didn't want to bother that person, especially they were on holiday. However, her determination was unanimous when another slamming door being heard again. Y/N didn't know if it was still Harry, or Marcel. Quickly she found a name in her contact and pressed the call button without hesitation.

. . . .

Anne knocked on their door exactly at four while her son was out from an hour ago. Both of the women hugging each other before Y/N helped Anne with her suitcase, and of course the mother would ask her son whereabouts since it was only Y/N who opened the door for her.

“Harry is out. I think he's taking a walk, or cycling?” Y/N mumbled after escorted Anne to her room.

Anne just nodded, but, she quickly noticed something was wrong when her son's girlfriend looked off. Squinting her eyes, she took Y/N's arms and bring her down to sit with her.

“Are you okay, sweetheart? You look.. off.”

A nervous laugh came out from Y/N's mouth, "I'm fine. It's just.. well, Harry is in a bad mood today, so don't be surprised if he's a little grumpy."

“You two didn't fight, did you?” Anne frown, “Did I come at a bad time?”

“No, no. We didn't fight. We're fine, really fine.”

“Good then. The bruised on your neck told me so.”

Y/N gaped at what Anne just said, her face flushed in embarrassment and reflexively covered her neck. While she was feeling awkward, Anne just winked at her – laughing softly before patted her arm.

“Do you want me to look around? We have our private dock and I believe you'll like it.” she quickly changed the subject, hoping Anne would do that. She couldn't linger staring at the older woman after she was being caught for her sex life.

“Sure. This cottage is so pretty, you know?” Anne smiled, getting up from the bed and went out with Y/N.

“Definitely. I rented this right away when I saw the description.”

Y/N happily guided Anne to each room while Anne admired every corner of the cottage they rent. She squealed in surprise when her eyes caught an outside hot tub with the lake viewing. But, the things she liked the most were the massive kitchen and the terrace with the beautiful lake view every day.

“How's him, Y/N? How's Harry coping with all those problems?” asked Anne, sitting in the iron chair. Her eyes stared warmly at Y/N, soft yet worries smile adorned her lips, “He wouldn't tell me about that in the slightest, and I'm worried about him if he keeps it to himself.”

“The good news, Anne, we're going to file a lawsuit in court with all valid evidence we have, and I'm sure Harry will win this case. One of the subjects has been arrested while the main man is still out there. And it leads to the bad news."

“That was... fast?”

Y/N nodded, "I know. But, it's not – according to Harry. He thinks Allen and his team are taking too long to deal with all of these, and he has been emotionally unstable since Allen called him this morning for only told him another subject still hasn't caught."

“And.. Erskine? Lucas would take over his job for a while, wouldn't he?"

“It's the best choice at the moment. We thought with Harry being so unstable controlling his anger lately, and the client's currently waning trust in him – we asked your nephew to help us at our headquarter since he already understands his duties and not someone else for the company – especially he's the family. I apologise if our plan is presumptuous, we're just trying to keep your family's business."

“I understand, Y/N. Lucas told me your plan to try to foster the client's trust by temporarily changing Harry's position. He also said you guys lost a lot of clients, and that's obviously a big problem." Anne sighed, "This isn't easy for my son."

“I can't even imagine being him, Anne. With so much to endure, he must be so depressed. I don't blame him for always having a hard time holding back his anger.” she mumbled, “He didn't even take his medicine! He needs them to help him relax.”

The sound of the opened gate made the two woman pause, turning their gaze to Harry's figure who had just returned. Anne hurriedly walked in to meet him in the hallway, while Y/N following behind her. Harry wasn't so surprised to see his mother in front of him, he quickly greeted her and hugged the woman who gave birth to him.

“I'm going upstairs. Just call me if the dinner was ready." he gave them a small nod before jog up to the second floor. Y/N just smiled apologetically at Anne who was shrugging her shoulders, "That's what worries me."

“Was he like that from the start of this holiday?”

“He was unstable. He was fine at first, but if something ticked him, he just threw rude or harsh word. Then, this morning became worst – like what I told you before. He was screaming, even slamming the door.”

Anne pinched her temple, “I'll try to talk to him at dinner. Maybe he'll listen to his mother. He shouldn't be so tense on his break time.”

. . . .

“What are you doing here?”

Yesterday, exactly when Harry was on the phone with Allen, Y/N took a risky decision. With doubts put aside, she called Niall for advice. Since their holiday should go well, it turned a little unpleasant because a few small things bothered Harry and even got Marcel had the chance to swap their positions. Being the kindest person he was, Niall offered to visit them. Mainly last night Y/N sent him a message that Harry or Marcel, had yelled at Anne. And that wasn't a nice thing to see.

How did Anne respond? Of course, she was shocked. Her son had never yelled at her for such a small thing. No, Anne wasn't angry. Anne was concerned and worried about him.

Niall's smiled faltered when his blue eyes seeing Harry was standing in front of him. The way his best friend's green eyes showed displeasure at his presence, and from then on he could tell Harry was in a complete mess.

“I met him at a cafe not far from here this morning, he was ordering his breakfast when I said hello. Turn out he's in a symposium. And I invited him over for lunch.” Y/N lied, exchanging the look with Niall beside her. Impossible for her to be honest with her boyfriend, he could have thrown his best friend out if she intentionally invited Niall to come over.

“Hello, H. It's been so long since your last session.” Niall shrugged, “How are you?”

“Fine,” Harry muttered, then he flicked his eyes to her, “Mum was asking for you. She needs your help with the noodles.”

She nodded, “All right.” then smiled to both men, “I'll leave you two.”

Y/N rushed to meet Anne in the kitchen while occasionally glancing out the window watching Harry and Niall who started talking while walking towards the patio.

“Do you think this is a good idea?” Anne threw a question while stirring her pot, “Is he suspicious?”

“I told him I met Niall just this morning and he's on.. a business trip, kind of. Then, I asked him to come over.” she answered, “He was a little unfriendly to Niall. But, he did nothing.”

“I just wish he could open up to his friend, at least. Maybe he's a bit hesitant to talk with me.” Anne sighed, “I can't believe he hesitated to talk to his mother or girlfriend.”

“Maybe he would feel comfortable talking to another male."

If only Anne knew..

Niall was her son's doctor, a psychiatrist. It was very easy for a professional like him to get Harry to talk to him. He wasn't only acting like a best friend, but also a doctor to his patients. And Y/N put hopes on Niall, so at least her boyfriend could hold his emotions and let this short getaway be a success for him to calm down.

“Harry doesn't look that tense any more. The way he's standing more relaxed now.”

“Should we call them in? I think they'll be more comfortable talking with stomach full.”

Anne just smiled and nodded while preparing the plates. The conversation between Niall and Harry stopped as she slid the door and invite them for the lunch.

During the lunch, Harry had his mouth shut closed – just enjoying his meal. Sometimes it made Niall had to led the conversation so he would join them. Y/N and Anne sighed in relief when Harry was laughing a little for whatever jokes that Niall said. At least, that's a good thing Y/N had seen since he received the call from Allen.

Talking about that, Harry still hadn't told her what made him so annoyed when his lawyer called him. She also didn't dare to ask him straight forward, just let him took his time to come and told her – if he wanted to.

The sun was getting dimmer, and Niall was still talking with Harry – took him to the dock and making Harry unconsciously undergo his therapy session. It took them almost two hours before they get back inside.

Y/N paced back and forth waiting for Niall in the hallway, while peeking at him who was saying goodbye to Harry and Anne. She exhaled in relief when Niall approached her at the door.

“Is it done?” she bit her lip, whispering to Niall since she didn't want Harry to hear them.

“He's fine,” Niall nodded, “He's unstable, even when I talked to him his emotions were volatile. His resentment towards Dale greatly affected his mood.”

She lowered his voice, “Was Marcel there? He showed up this morning, I think. It was when his lawyer called him.”

“Even Harry behaved as normally as possible, I think a third of our conversation – I spoke to Marcel. And that was the most friendly conversation with Marcel. If usually he always bitter to me, he just told about his grudge and disgust – albeit he had snap at me beforehand.”

“Will he be okay? Do you think this will be successful?” she worried, “He could stay away from his phone and not think too much about all of these. But, Harry is still Harry.”

“Honestly, he refused when I asked him to take his medicine. Which I think it was Marcel who refused me, not Harry. But, you may try dissolving the medicine and mix it with his food.”

“I'll try.” she mumbled, then smiling sincerely, “Thank you so much for taking your time to come here. That's very helpful.”

“My pleasure, Y/N. I happen to be in Leeds, so not that far to drive here. Besides, I'm also worried about him.” he sighed, scratching his nose, “How's Erskine, anyway? Heard from him, he has no more control in the company.”

“He's exaggerating too much. Lucas, his cousin, currently takes his place for a moment only until Erskine gets its clients back. His job is nothing more than restoring public confidence in Erskine. When it starts to recover, Harry will return to the office.”

“Fine then. I hope everything goes well.” Niall smiled, “I should go now. Thank you for the lunch.”

“You don't wanna stay for dinner?”

“Ah, thank you. But, I have to go back to Surrey tomorrow morning.”

Y/N nodded in understanding, then escorted him out and waited until his car left her cottage. A small smile on her lips faded when she turned around – finding her boyfriend standing just a few feet away. The man was just silent while staring at her, his eyes sharp made her shudder.

“Harry?” mumbled her, taking a few step forward carefully. Her eyes were still staring at him who hadn't respond. Her heart rumbling, was it Marcel in front of her right now?

“Mar–”

“You invited him on purpose, why?”

Y/N froze. Did Harry hear her conversation with Niall? Since when was he standing there?

She wanted to lie, but if she did, Harry would be furious at her. His cold voice indicated that he didn't like what he has accused of her. And she had no choice.

“I talked to him about your session. And he told me he was in Leeds and would come over if he had time.” she said, “And then he came over. So, I assumed he had spare time.”

“And you lied to me.”

“I have no intention of lying to you, H.” she pleaded, “I was just asking for an advice and he offered to help, by coming over.”

She wasn't lying but that wasn't the truth.. her inner goddess facepalmed.

Harry snickered, shaking his head, “Don't lie to me.”

“H..”

“What are you hiding from me?!”

She paused her step when Harry shouted at her. Her heart was beating wildly yet he still dared to look into his eyes. She wasn't sure, was this Harry or Marcel?His irises were still bright like Harry's, but suddenly darkened a second later – before brightened again.

“I'm not hiding anything from you.” whispered her, “Don't you trust me?”

A deep frown formed on the forehead when Harry was laughing, shaking his head like she just told him something funny. But, what came out of his mouth struck her.

“How can I trust you if you lie to me? What's your intention brought Niall here? Trying to give me a ted talk and tell me everything is gonna be okay?! Bullshit, Y/N! All is not well.”

His loud yelling made her shrink and it was depressing. It might not be good for her to lie to her boyfriend but she did it for his good. She just wanted him to recover and stay positive through the problems.

“Harry, can you lower your voice, please? I don't want Anne to hear." she begged, "I'm sorry if you don't feel that way and I don't understand how you feel. But, this isn't the end. Soon, you'll be free. Victoria had been arrested, and the case still running while they hunt Dale down. Once he's caught, everything will slowly return to normal."

Taking a step closer, Y/N placed her palm on his bicep – stroking the tense muscle, trying to ease him. “At least your anger and resentment will pay off.”

Harry roughly brushed her hand away, looking at her sarcastically then left her alone.

“Don't repeat that bullshit again," he scoffed from the dining room, "How will everything be all right? You don't know how hard it is to grow trust. Not everything will be. Maybe for you, but not for me. Everything won't be the same."

“Harry,” she walked to him who was standing by the sliding door, looking through a glass the like across them, “We'll go through this together. If everything will no longer be the same, we'll face it together. And I believe, good fortune will be on our side.”

Y/N thought Harry heard her when he didn't argue. Yet, she was wrong when the man smirked at her. He turned his body to face her with his eyes gazed at her so scornful.

“How many times have I told you, how can I trust you after you lied to me about that fucking doctor?”

“HOW CAN!?”

She flinched when his loud voice rang in her ears, reflexively kept her head away from him. She didn't lie when she felt like wanted to cry. This was the first time Harry screamed at her after a long time. The feelings of worry and disappointment stirred in her heart.

“How can I trust you when you have another intention with that fucking psychiatrist?! How can I trust you after you made my directors agreed to have Lucas as your new boss and kicked me out of my own company?!” he screeched, “How can I trust anyone when they can betray me?!”

“How could you say that?" her voice trembled, "I don't kick you out from your own company. We all know Lucas is just for clout. You still hold the highest position, and the most important one."

“You know very well I hate a liar, Y/N.” he rolled his eyes, “I can't just believe what you say while you keep a lot of things to hide. I don't know as much and as important as how much you cover up. I can't believe with people around me just like that.” he growled, “Everyone always put on a mask before it finally disappointed me.”

“I don't hide anything from you! Why are you doubting me, H?" she cried out, "If I lie or was pretending in front of you, why am I always beside you? Don't you think I'm not tired? I'm exhausted! I'm exhausted of all these problems!" her panting breath suffocated her, "Who's not tired of dealing with problems of someone disordered?"

Harry clenched his teeth, “Watch your mouth, Y/N. You can't carelessly call me abnormal.”

“I don't call you abnormal? You're just.. different.”

“And now you're just lying to me.”

“Harry?” she looked at him shocked, “I'm not lying to–”

“Yes, you're. You just called me abnormal, different, someone with disordered and won't admit it. What's the difference between abnormal, different, and disordered?"

“Don't twist my words, Harry..”

“Fucking liar!” He violently hit the glass door until she could feel the vibration, her breath caught off when he leaned forward – staring at her coldly while his raged breath kissed her skin. She noticed his pupils were dilated and irises grew darker with face reddened with anger. Was Harry so annoyed with her?

“I'm not fucking liar!" she shook her head, "Stop accusing me of being a liar!"

“Then, what's the right nickname for you?” he challenged, “A fucking slut?”

Hearing your significant other uttered something that you never imagined before, of course it would break your heart. Y/N had never thought before her Harry would shatter her feelings – her heart. Especially she was aware enough it was really him who said that, not another one. When the rude nickname slid out of his mouth, she looked him in disbelief. The way her eyes flashed how upset she was, her breath was short as if there was something suffocated her.

“Excuse me, Harry?” her voice was low, “A slut? Really? What do you mean by that?”

“What other nicknames suits you if you don't want to–”

“I'm not a fucking slut!”

This was the first time, and Y/N hoped would be the last time, she raised her voice in front of Harry. They would never yell at each other if they got into a small argument. For Harry himself, it was no secret he had shouted in her face, well it was Marcel actually, but what he just said was completely out of his own soul. Somehow if he was annoyed and uncomfortable, everything would look wrong for him. Even if he could be honest, he thought this holiday was useless since that made it difficult for him to monitor his company, and all of the problem he had.

“What's better than slut for someone moaned another man's name when she had sex with her boyfriend?" he laughed derisively, his eyes refused to look at his girlfriend who saw him with a dropped jaw.

“Are you fucking mental, Harry? When did I ever do that?" she gritted her teeth, "Don't make up something that–"

“Marcel was laughing at me after that night. He's always bragging how he could make you moan his name.”

It was like being thrown to the bottom of the ocean when Harry muttered something she never expected. She was dizzy, she felt she couldn't breathe. The nape of her neck was hot, her tongue locked leaving her speechless. She never found out Harry knew the accident that night, in which they were – or she and Marcel, drunk and ended up taking off each other's clothes, – and you knew what happened the rest. In her mind, he never remembered it since he was drunk and never brought it up later.

“And you just realised it, Y/N?” he tilted his head with the look in his eyes was piercing through her heart, “You don't know how disgusting it was to see you fucking him, Y/N.”

“And now tell me..” his chest panted, “WHAT'S MORE FITTED ON YOU THAN A SLUT!?”

His voice boomed around the cottage making Y/N turned her head away. She could feel the flames of rage roiling within him, and she wasn't brave enough to go any further. Her heart pained by the way he called her, but she realised that Harry was hiding his pain and pretended that he didn't know that his lover was having sex with another man.

“Harry, we were drunk that night and–”

“And you realised that he wasn't me, didn't you? And yet you still let him fucked you.” he scoffed, “You were aware he's Marcel, Y/N.”

“I– ”

Harry turned his body, his hands crossed on his chest. And at that time, Y/N wanted to cry because she couldn't recognise the eyes was staring at her. No, not whose eyes they belonged to. But, the way he was looking at her like she was a trash.

“Or maybe you enjoyed being fucked by Marcel?”

“Harry, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to–”

Her trembling voice was refuted by him who looked so done, "You don't know the feeling. My heart broke to see you did that but on the other hand I couldn't do anything. I am sick of being helpless when something that should be mine is being used by others."

“Now, tell me, Y/N. What would you feel if you were me?”

Y/N shook her head, her eyes were squinting. No, she couldn't imagine it. She couldn't imagine it because she didn't want her heart break. She couldn't imagine the disappointment she had to accept.

“Why, Y/N? Why did you do it? Why did you let it happen?”

She shuddered, his whisper right in her ear made the goosebumps appeared on her skin. She could feel how close his face was to her right now albeit her eyes still shut closed, refusing to look at his eyes. She couldn't bear the eyes of someone who disappointed with her.

“Do you want him instead?”

“TELL ME!”

With the blink of an eye, Harry grabbed her hand and pushed her down to the floor, sending her squeezed into the corner of the kitchen. His rough behaviour once again made her frozen in place, never in her head she thought he could rude to him. And this was Harry, not Marcel.

His slow steps took him to the woman who was curled in the corner. She gulped harshly when he squatted in front of her. She couldn't make a sound, her adrenaline was racing, her heart was pounding with fear. She felt like a lonely deer ready to be pounced on by a hungry tiger.

“How could I trust someone who lied to me?” he worked his jaw, “And the most pathetic thing is, she's someone who's important. But, she played me with lies and bullshit.”

“I'm not, H..” her voice quaked, “I'm not lying anything. And for Marcel incident, I couldn't say how wrong I was.”

“You know I don't like liars and traitors, Y/N. We've talked about this before. I even entrusted my big secret to you but this is what I got?” his voice was cold, sharp and heart-wrenching, “You have no idea how disgusted I am for thinking my girlfriend fucking someone. And both of them seemed enjoyed it so much.”

“Harry..” she began to sob, “I don't mean that way..”

He got up, walking away from her. With a huff, he paced back and forth in front of her. For a moment, he rubbed his face before shaking his head with a chuckle. She cautiously watching him carefully, she didn't dare enough to move from there since her body becoming numb.

“We both knew we enjoyed that night, darling.”

She had never turned her head this fast, staring at him who suddenly was standing in front of her. Oddly enough, he was smiling at her. Smiling like he wasn't mad at her like a few moments ago. And now, she recognises the pair of eyes that always haunted her nightmare. She saw Marcel there, smiling sickly at her.

“What do you want, Marcel?" she growled at her, muster up the courage to confront the creator of all these messes, "Don't you feel enough? Don't you feel enough to ruin Harry's life? My life?"

“Oh, darling.” he cooed sweetly, “He was very upset. He was crying because he couldn't stop me and saw with his own eyes how much you enjoyed our sex.”

“I was drunk, Marcel.”

“I'm aware. But, whose name did you moan that night? Harry or me?” he smirked, “I'm flattered that you knew I was there and still let me made you orgasm.”

“Stop it, Marcel.”

“Why? I'm talking the truth, am I?” he arched an eyebrow, “You have no idea how much I missed the feeling of your skin on me. Can we do that again? And maybe give Harry a little show?”

Y/N didn't think twice as she stood up to attack Marcel. She didn't care that the person in front of her now shared the same body as Harry. All she wanted was to punch Marcel. But, he quickly stepped back before turning his body away.

“No! Go away, Marcel.”

She heard he was talking to Marcel. Was this Harry talking to Marcel?

“Stop!”

He grabbed his own hair with knees fell to the floor. He grimaced, as if in pain, with his fingers still tangled between the roots – pulling them harder. Y/N hesitated. What should she do? Should she approached him or keeping the distance?

Because what she was paying attention to at this time, Harry was trying to prevent Marcel from taking over. His hoarse voice repeatedly saying no to the person who tried to control his mind.

Yet, everything went silent when no more sound came out of his mouth. Only their ragged breath filled the open air. Y/N still huddled in the corner while Harry still backing her. She thought this was the right moment for her to approach him. She got up and took her steps painfully slow, hand reached out to touch her boyfriend's arm. Her heart was pounding so heart like she could hear them clearly in her ear, cold sweat pouring down her neck like she was about to experience something. Everything was so quiet, painfully quite that it scared her. Never once did she feel like this even when Marcel was around.

“Harry?”

Not for a second she landed her hand on his arm, the man quickly turned his body making her flinched. She didn't know why Harry scared her so much with the way he glared at her. She ventured back into touching him, but what happened next made her gasped – again. He pushed her again until she fell near the dining table, made her head hit the edge of the table. What's wrong with him?

“What's wrong with you?” she cried out, touching her temple which seemed to be swollen. Hell, she wanted to scream at him. She really understood his emotions were unstable but pushing her away wasn't something nice.

“Sometimes I think, maybe it was a mistake to let you knew my secret.” he murmured, eyes looking away from her, “At the end of the day, you would use that for your own good.”

“Pardon?”

“I trusted you with my secret. I trusted you with him. If I never told you about him, I would never see you were fucking with him!”

Harry thought everything would be fine if he pretended to know nothing. Yet, every time he thought about it, his chest was aching. Like something was giving him a pressure. The feeling of betrayal and guilt, always haunted his heart and mind. He felt betrayed by the two of them but it was all his fault. Who wouldn't get mad if their girlfriend betrayed him in such a thing like that?

“But, you're the one who chose to tell me, Harry! I never asked you. You told me you thought I was the right person to deserve your difference. You trusted me, Harry." she panted, "Let me ask you right now. Where's your trust in me? Why do I even think you don't trust me any more?"

“Don't you think I'm tired of all this? I'm tired of your erratic temper. With your emotions that I couldn't guess. I'm sick of you not being able to control yourself when I know you can! But, guess what? You chose to won't try.” she screamed, didn't care if Anne heard them upstairs. “Do you think it's easy to handle someone like you? Absolutely not! God was very kind to give me patience all of this time.”

“Now, I'm thinking. Maybe all this is God's way of repaying everything you've done. As Harry, or even Marcel.”

Harry didn't even need to think twice when he grabbed the nearest pitcher and threw it to her. Y/N couldn't even dodge it since it was so fast hitting her. She looked at him dead in the eye, not believing what had just happened. But the pain in her head seemed to make her realised that the man who was supposed to protect her, treated her harshly and didn't hesitate to hurt her.

She blinked her eye, trying to digest what just happened. Y/N didn't know how hard the pitcher hitting her head until it was shattered and hurt her. She felt the pain just after a drop of blood ran through her face. Then, she shifted her eyes to him. Harry. She couldn't trust her voice at this point, just giving him a look of disappointment and pain to him to understand. And for Harry, he was still had his eyes on her with a reddened face, jaw tightened and both fists were clenching tightly.

Both of them didn't say a word, just exchanged glances. Y/N didn't feel the pain, her adrenaline was racing so hard that she felt like he was numb.

“How many more times do you need to hurt me, Harry? Have you not realised all this time, the way you closed yourself for me is also hurting me? And do you realise that too makes me question your trust in me?” whispered her, “Tell me, H. How can we restore the trust and be optimistic about everything we face?”

Harry still had his mouth closed, eyes sharp on her. During the silence, Y/N felt the excruciating pain in her bloody head. But, she ignores it. She needed an answer from him, now.

“TELL ME!”

Harry was seeing red. No one ever tested his patience like this. Not his family. Not the company. Not even Marcel. Maybe Marcel would applaud him seeing he couldn't make peace with himself. After all, that was what Marcel wanted, right?

Hearing his girlfriend raised her voice at him, he felt she was insulting him. With jaw clenched tightly, he pulled her away before smashing her against the wall. Y/N felt her back and head hit the wall hard. She couldn't count the number of times her body being slammed, she was too busy trying to get Harry's hand off her and begging him mercy.

“This is what you've got for betrayed me.” Harry gritted his teeth, no longer slamming her body but hands still tightly gripped her hair, “Don't even test my patience if you can't handle it.”

“You're the one who tested my patience, Harry.” her breath stammered, her head was burning.

She cackled slightly, before coughing because her breath was shortened. Her eyes glanced slightly at Harry who still gripping her roots, “Do whatever you want, Harry. I can't stop you, can I?”

Everything went creepy silence along with Anne's deafening scream. She blinked softly, lolling her head towards her boyfriend. She didn't know why she was smiling like nothing happened. The last thing she knew, she smelt her own blood soaking her face as her breath slackened. . . Please excuse some errors Talk to me :)

[idjitlili]

Swayze

Bard x modern!reader

summary:Imagine going out with Bard to a not very deep river with  ,when telling him about a little fantasy you have had since a child. thank you loteriel_greenleaf for helping me pick a character. xx

word count:1900?

warnings:uh muscles. a/n:sorry for not writing for like two days.

Okay ,okay ,okay so you have been in middle earth for like three years,how did you get here you ask? Yes fourth wall breaking ,can you guess who this is? Deadpool-no,okay anyways. You haven't got a fuck of an idea how you got here only that you dad pushed you into a swimming pool only for you to pass through that and fall into a freezing lake.

Your dad probably freaking out right about now,oh no wheres my daughter oh shit ,shes dead,no what she vanished ,damn I shouldn’t have called her a witch.

When you hit the lake you had lost consciousness,only to wake up a few minutes later coughing up water,laying on your side. Once you turned you eyes had went wide ,next to you a brown haired ,and eyed man sat kneels staring at you. Damn he was handsome with that long hair and mhmm face like gosh damn ,sexy. You were beyond confused ,as you looked around to only see ice and that you were on a bloody boat. "w-where is my dad?" you had spoken pretty well from just coughing up bloody water from almost bloody drowning. The man who was only dressed in a shirt no coat instead that was wrapped around your shoulders ,you were shaking so that definitely helped to be honest.

He had just looked at you confused eyebrows scrunched up ,"your dad? you fell from the sky ,I have no clue ,I want to know how in middle earth that is possible woman."

That's how your life got flipped turned upside down And you'd like to take a minute just sit right there,I'll tell you how you  become the prince of a town called dale. Well not prince maybe queen in a few years ,wink wink.  Anyways you began living with the bargeman you soon knew as Bard ,oh darn he was your will smith to fresh prince.

Anyways you would watch his kids,and in return he fed you and homed you,he even brought you gifts and  dresses.He would take you to the market ,and buy you anything you wanted ,he wasn't poor like he was when you both first met ,especially now he was king.

You had become very close to him and his children; Sigrid and Tilda would tease you saying that their father liked you ,you would tell them no you were just friends. Of course they didnt believe that ,Sigrid and Bain saw the blush upon your cheeks when their father brought you a gift ,or even compliment your hair or bread. You didnt know they would also tease their father ,telling him to get some guts and just tell you how he felt,of course he was nervous.

Dale was almost rebulit now ,you had been living with them for three years, you were starting to lose hope in Bard.

WEll were ,anyways it was like 1 pm on a sunday the kids were out at the library ,as they had homework to catch upon ,well only Tilda but she forgot so Sigrid was helping her. Whilst Bain was out with some of his friends ,doing who knows what. However you  had went  field near a swallow river ,unknownly to you Bard had followed you.You had sat on the edge of a rock bare feet in the swallow water.  You could hear the foot steps now ,making you turn abruptly grabbing a rock only to drop it ,turn your frown into a light smile when you see its Bard.

He lightly grinning,"damn,you followed me?what if i was going to an orgy?" you had teased the bowman/king dude,who scoffed at your words. "you getting it? when? " oyour mouth gapped at his words,your faced scrunched up in fake offence. "wow ,you state the obvious ,like how Bain will lose his virginity before me." okay so maybe you shouldn't have brought his son into this ,you were expecting an lecture but you got a light chuckle as he sat next to you,but didnt put his feet in the water.

"Miss y/n ,I did not know you were a virgin,for such a beautiful woman,thought you would have been courted in the time you have been with us." he had stated simply ,slightly shocked. Your heart sunk,it was clear he didn't want to court you then.  "how many times no miss just y/n/n,also who would I court Alfrid ,oh sorry he's dead, so no one." It wasn't a lie when you thought yourself as anything but beautiful ,in reality you were an angel with your looks even if you couldn't see that yourself.

"no matter what you say ,you are indeed attractive." he had looked at you will softly speaking you had just wiggled your toes in the warm water,it was a hot day,but you felt like it was going to rain later. Trying to hide the blush on your cheeks ,for a couple of minutes neither of you spoke,until you did.

"you know back in my world ,there was this movie,sorry movie is like a play but you can watch it on this box called a tv, they record the original ,its like millions of pictures - okay so its like play thats all that matters. AS a kid it was my favourite ,I would watch it over an over. It was called dirty dancing ,well yeah uh its exactly that well not really. A girl goes to this place for a holiday ,its like a camp where you can learn to dance ,anyways the many dancer gets pregnant ,but cant afford the baby so she gets doctor to get rid of it ,but he's actually a horrible doctor and she gets very hurt. This causes baby the girl who goes to this camp to take over the lead dancer role with Johnny,and he has to teach her. OOh and the dirty dancing bit well they end up doing the dirty to music ,and when I was eight I would re watch the scene over and over-" you try to explain to Bard ,when you saw the lake you thought of the lift ,but you were cut off by Bard.

"So you were 8 ? and you got arroused by a sex scene?! Who let you watch that! I cant imagine what you are going to be like when you finally-" you had gasped at his words ,shoving him playfullly. "hey,hey dont you imagine me like that ,can I get to my point?"you had questioned he had nodded ,shuffing closer to you again,your shoulders touching.

"Anyways ,there was a bit were they had to learn a lift for the dance and they practiced in a lake like this one,I have always dreamed about doing that,so yeah if you were wondering why I was out here ,I like to day dream."he had listened to your words intensely ,before stranding up pulling his jacket off. "W-what are you doing?" you had stood up carefully after him. "why dream of it ,when we can make it happen," your flashed red, you had let out a quiet "okay" as he pulled his boots ,and shirt off you tried not looking but hot damn he was hot. You would have loved if he had a dad body ,but no he was bloody muscular. Damn.

You looked away pulling your dress off swiftly, leaving you in your shorts and a corset in which you had reomoved leaving you in a vest from your home. Bard had looked away ,but why he was going to have to look at you in the water. "Come on." you had ushered grabbing his hand pulling him with you ,as you walked into the water. It was hot day but it didnt mean that water was warm ,it was bloody chilly. Soon the water was up to   Bard's hips when you had said this is far enough. You could feel the fish in the water as stood slightly away from him infront. "how does this lift go,hm?" he had asked looking at your face trying not to make you uncomfortable ,bro its not like the vest was even wet yet so it wasnt see through.

"well,uhm,you put your hands here-" you had walked forward, grabbed his rough large hands placing them on your hips where your skin was bare,from the vest was slightly cropped.  In which he had gripped them slightly. "then I put my hands here-" in which you placed your hands on his shoulders,though they only need to be there until you were off your feet."then when I slightly jump ,you lift me up and then I let go of you ,so its like I'm balancing." you had explained simply as you possibly could, he had nodded understanding in with what you had explained..

You had looked into his brown sorrow eyes,as he stared back into your e/c ones,sorta to make sure he was ready,and when it felt like you had been staring at him too long you had slightly jumpled. In response he had lifted you with ease ,you had brought your arms out to the side like you was a bird as you were held above his head. Bard had looked at you from his steady hands smiling before you had lost your balance falling down,also causing him to fall with you.  Submerging into the water just like how you had both met ,vest sticking to you and becoming see through. Bard had pulled you up so you were both standing in the water like before only super close and super soaking.

You were pushed up against his bare chest as his arms were around your waist."that happened in the movie,a couple of times before they got it." you had stated nervously looking into his big brown eyes ,his wet long hair dripping as did yours sticking to your skin."oh really? well I guess we must do it until we get it" oh how you wished to say thats what she said. Instead you had nodded at the smirking man ,who put his hands on your bare hips again.  

It only took you like seven more tries until you got it and when you did ,he had lowered you down ,wrapping your arms around his neck,whereas his were around your waist. You feet were off the river floor wrapped around him as you clung onto Bard ,grinning down at him,in which he smiled back. "thank you for that,Bard. You are the kindest man I have ever met ,first you save me from drowning in a strange world,then you home me and feed me ,then you make me fall in love with me ,in which I agree is the only bad thing becau-" before you could even panic in regret of your confession he had pressed his lips to yours.

"i love you too ,y/n/n" he had spoken quietly when you had broken the kiss,only for it to start pooring down with rain ,in which you had jumped from bard rushing out of the water ,him following getting dressed,to rush home to your children.

You were brought to middle earth to meet your patrick swayze,though you were so over the moon when you met that cutie hobbit dildo gaggins.

[dontdietwd]

Day 67, part 1

There was a bell. A freaky, loud church bell, sounding clearly among the trees of the eerie silent woods. It felt like we were in a scene of a trash horror movie, with a church bell sounding distant yet loud in the woods, the very same woods where Sophia was nowhere to be found. Where nearly the entire group had been wandering for what felt like hours following Daryl’s lead. Where a little hope had been found, only to be shredded again when we found it was not Sophia inside that abandoned tent.

So we ran, following the church bell as if the church itself was calling for us, tired, mumbled words saying it could be someone who’d found her, or herself, hope flagging up instantly as we ran, stopping only on the tree line where here was a small graveyard before the church could be seen.

“This can’t be it,” Shane said immediately as he looked around. “Got no steeple, no bells,” but was ignored as Rick started walking fast towards it, Daryl right by his side with me catching up immediately as well as the others followed. Shane still insisted this could not be the right place, the bells should have been coming from somewhere else. The church itself was empty but for three or four dormant walkers who woke up as soon as the opening door made a loud banging noise against the wall. I entered right after Daryl and stood with the others as I watched him along with Rick and Shane killing them all.

“Hey!” I loudly whispered. “Enough! One hit on the brain’s enough,” making Rick and Shane stop their ploughing into the already dead’s heads. We all looked around in a bit of a daze at the silent church, the others oozing in as we started looking around doors and close to the altar, weapons still ready.

“Hey, JC?” Daryl said as he looked at the cross. “You taking requests?” and then he was running out of the church faster than anybody else when the bells started sounding again somewhere absurdly close to us, only so we’d find out the bells were programmed and sounding from a sound box by the side of the church.

“It’s a timer…” he told people, disappointment dripping from his voice. “It’s on a timer…”

“Fuck,” I whispered under my breath, my hand that held a tomahawk rising to clear the sweat from my forehead.

“I’m going back inside…” we all heard Carol’s defeated voice announce and most followed her inside, Daryl and I included.

The desperate mother sat on the front row for a moment before kneeling and posing her hands in front of her. She then started praying aloud, crying, somehow blaming herself for what was happening to her daughter, saying she had prayed wrong and that if she had been a bad person, she was the one who should be punished, not Sophia. I felt like running to her and shaking her off of it, telling her she’d been so much as victim of everything as her girl, and that she should never add guilt to the pain she was already feeling. I couldn’t, though, so I just took a hard, painful breath and walked away, leaving the church hurriedly through the left side door.

“You okay?” Daryl asked immediately as he followed me out and found me by a tree with my face buried in my hands.

“That’s just,” I paused to sniffle into my hands. “That’s just so fuckin’ sad. The things she’s saying, what she’s feeling...”

“Shouldn’t blame herself…” Daryl agreed in a low voice, his crossbow in his hand pointing to the ground as he looked around and at me repeatedly.

“No, she shouldn’t…” I lifted my head, hands drying my tears. “She needs to blame someone but don’t feel it’s right to blame Rick because he didn’t mean to, so she’s taking the guilt.”

Daryl said nothing, just stood there with me, probably at a loss of words. He didn’t understand deep feelings, I guess, like most men, he couldn’t know what was going through a desperate mother’s mind now, so he could only take my words for the truth. I was about to be a mother too; I guess I was abler to imagine her pain than he was.

We saw Andrea and Shane talking as they walked around the graveyard, animatedly, being that in a good way or not.

“Did you know that’s what’d happened?” I asked Daryl as I observed them.

“What?”

“Andrea tried to stay at the CDC to die?”

He took a second to answer, “Nah. Just saw how her and Dale were the last ones out.”

“She tried to do as Jackie did and Dale didn’t let her.”

“Yeah, I heard them too.”

“That’s some deep shit right there, I gotta tell you…”

“We don’t gotta think of that now,” Daryl moved his eyes from Andrea to look at me again. “She’s a hella grown woman. We gotta other things to worry now.”

“She’s grieving, don’t know if she want to be alive or not… All worried about guns and her own pistol and stuff, she’s just trying to think o’ something else. If she wanted to be dead she’d found a way by now. Wondered to the woods until she found a walker or whatever.”

“Yeah, like I said, we gotta other things to worry now.”

“Sophia...” I looked down.

“Gonna get dark soon,” Daryl told me as he looked up at the sky. “We wandered to far from the road, gotta take these people back.”

“Already?” I asked looking at him. “Seems like we just stared…”

“Yeah, it’s about four now.”

“Feels too early to stop. Like we just started.”

“Been at it for hours,” he disagreed. “People are tired. Ain’t you?”

“Nah, I’m fine. Wanna keep on a while longer.”

“They can’t. Will get harder to get back to the road later, gotta head back now.”

“I ain’t the only one,” I nodded towards where Rick paced on the graveyard. “He ain’t stopping now, I’m sure.”

Daryl looked at him too and took a moment to speak, nibbling on his lower lip. “Guilt’s eatin’ him alive.”

“Why he’ll keep going. I think I should stay with him.”

“You stayin’, I’m staying. Shane can get the others back to the road.”

I crossed her arms and shook my head a little, “You navigate better than he does. He gets lost on these woods with them all we’re fucked again.”

“You want me to take ‘em back?” Daryl asked nonplussed, turning to now stand facing me, “Split up?”

“I’d rather you go with me but I don’t trust Shane to take them back safe. I mean, look at that,” I now pointed at where Shane and Rick were now talking, heads low, their bodies tense in agitation. “You think they got an ounce of common sense now between ‘em two?” and I uncrossed my arms and started walking towards the two of them. “Nah. I trust you to keep tracking and looking even as you keep them all safe.”

“You won’t have much light left,” Daryl said as he followed me. “Better go back soon. Ya sure you’ll find your way?”

“You’ll point me,” I smiled at him. “Won’t get lost.”

He just grunted in response, clearly unpleased with my decision, but complied either way. He stopped walking when we reached the others from the group as I kept on walking until I met Rick and Shane. They stopped talking as I arrived.

“Let’s continue for a while, you and me,” I told Rick. “Daryl will guide the others back to the road. An hour or so, then we gotta head back ‘cause it will get dark.”

Rick looked at Shane as it seemed to me he was telling his friend that he’d been right about something, because next thing Shane said was, “Alright, fine, but you’re going, I’m going,” and he left no space for discussion, for the turned to walk away and back to the group. “Ya’ll gonna follow the creek bed back, ok? Daryl, you’re in charge. Three of us are gonna hang back, search this area another hour or so, just to be thorough.”

I could not help but roll my eyes – I’d always found people who rolled their eyes annoying, but I caught myself doing it more than I wished when it came to Shane – I   was just glad people were all looking at Shane now not to see it. The man was unbelievable with his need to be the one giving our orders, even when the decisions had not been his, but I had way too much in my head to try to convince him otherwise.

Only Daryl looked at me and saw it, and asked aloud, “You sure ‘bout that?”

I nodded as I walked towards him “Yeah, I’m sure. We’ll catch up with you guys or meet back at the road.”

“Alright,” he said only for me when I got near him and the others stopped hearing to pay attention to something little Carl was saying. ‘Still got water?”

“I’m out but Shane’s got some, we’ll share.”

“You loaded?” he pointed at my two guns tucked on my shoulder holsters.

“Still full, just hope I won’t need it.”

“’Kay. See you in a bit,” and Daryl turned to leave.

“Hey,” I reached out to touch his arm, making him stop and look at me. My hand glided down his arm for a moment before I let go, “Careful out there. Don’t die, ok?”

He gave one of those little, one-sided smirks, as if forcing himself not to smile, and said, “I won’t,” looked at me for another moment to see me nod with a little smile too, and turned away, meeting Lori and Rick along the way. “Here, I got a spare. Take it,” as he handed Lori a small gun.

The group walked away to where Daryl led them and I stood there with Rick and Shane and, now that I noticed, Carl.

“Hey,” I called him and Carl smiled up at me. “You staying?”

“Yeah!” he said proudly. “I’ll help look, she’s my friend.”

I smiled, shaking my head and looking again at the retreating group, at Daryl’s back, and then at Carl again. “You’re a brave little man, you know that? Gotta talk your dad into letting me teach you some stuff soon.”

“Like what?” his attention peaked.

I nearly regraded saying it because Carl was only too eager to imagine things he wanted to learn how to do. Shoot, use a knife, kill a walker. Shane tried to distract him from this conversation as Rick wandered back into the church for a few minutes, alone. I didn’t totally regret saying it, though. I knew he’d have to learn or he’d end up like Sophia, however it was that Sophia had or was going to end up, anyways.

The four of us walked away from the church area a while later, after checking our weapons again and taking small sips of water each, and moved on into the woods. Quietly, we walked in line, Rick opening it, followed by Carl and I, with Shane covering the rear. The woods were uncomfortably warm and wet, bugs finding their spots on our skins to stick on the sweat. I thought Carl would need something for the bites later, hoping we’d found something for it on the cars back on the road. It was all very quiet and it was easy to keep listening to any sounds around and let my mind roam at the same time. I knew I’d have to stop to pee soon and wasn’t happy with the though. I hated peeing in the woods.

A noise cut off any wandering thoughts from all of our minds. We stopped, attention peaking, even Carl understanding the need for silence now. It was a rustling sound, like feet walking softly on leaves, but we couldn’t see anything yet. Opening the line, Rick pointed to where the sound was coming and we restarted walking, ever so slowly, until it was finally visible. A deer, and a large grown one at that, was pacing just there ahead of us.

“Daryl was here we’d be barbecuing tonight…” I whispered not minding if any of them head me.

Carl was edging close to the deer now, slowly, light on his feet, and I could see, from where I stopped to watch, the joy radiating from him. The deer just stood there with its majestic antlers, head turned to the boy as it too observed him as if it had never seen the dangers of a human before. I caught herself smiling and looking at the other men, who had their eyes trained on Carl, just as stunned as I was.

That, that right there; that was why it was all worth it. Nature was still following its own course, beauty still existed, there was still hope, life. Even with the world decaying, children could still be joyful and see beautiful things. There was hope.

And then hope was shot in the stomach by a rifle.

It took seconds for any of us to register what had happened, and even after we moved, what the fuck had happened was not clear. The loud shotgun still echoed in my ears and Carl was on the ground, as still as the fallen deer before him. Rick ran mumbling no over and over to his son, and I was suddenly not where I had stood anymore, I was across the clearing, both my guns out and trained on a man’s head, yelling at him to drop the rifle.

“I didn’t see him! I didn’t see him, I swear!”

He was on his knees even if I never told him to kneel, his rifle on the floor without hesitation.

“Where the fuck did you come from?!” I yelled, desperation clear on my voice.

Carl was shot! He got shot! My mind kept repeating desperately on the background.

“A farm! There’s a farm! Was hunting! You gotta take him there!”

“Where?”

“That way!” he pointed to his left, his tearful eyes travelling from the farm’s direction to me and to Carl in a nauseating speed. “Less than two miles, straight ahead, there’s no missing it!”

“Why should I take him there?! You fuckin’ shot him!”

“Mr. Greene! Hershel! He’s a vet! He’ll help! Please, take him there!”

I turned, replacing my guns on the holster. As scared as I was I didn’t feel like the big, crying man was a threat right now. Shane was right there, his riffle pointing at the man anyways, and behind him Rick shook and held on to Carl.

“There’s a doctor!” I yelled.

“Get up!” Shane yelled at the man.

“That way?” I asked pointing.

“Yes!” the man cried as Shane grabbed his arm to make him get up. “Tell him Otis sent you! That there’s been an accident! He’ll help!”

“You’d better pray he’ll help!” I barked at him and turned to Shane. “I’ll run ahead, get them ready. Shane!” I cried to make Shane focus on me, his terrifyingly angry eyes finally meeting mine. “I’ll run ahead. You drag this sonofabitch with you. Rick!” I turned and ran to him, crouching by his side. “Rick, look at me!” Rick tried to focus on my face, looking up. “There’s a farm with a doctor. Shane will lead you there, I’m running ahead!” and I left him and went back to Otis, who was on his feet, a poor shape of a man. “Two miles you said?”

“Give or take, yes, please go, he’ll help!”

I heard nothing else. Turning on my spot, I sprint up to a fast run, trees flying past me. It was hard to keep up a good speed with them all around, leaves and twigs all around, but nothing mattered. My legs were burning and I could feel the energy being drained from me at every passing second, but I couldn't stop. It was not an option. Rick was coming with Carl and I had to get to this farm, I had to get them ready, I had to convince them to get ready to help. The shot still echoed in my mind even as I ran, feeling my heartbeat in my head, my wrist aching more than it had ever ached in my life. Worried about the direction and the speed, I couldn’t avoid the thin branch in front of my face and felt a sharp, painful sting, but chose to ignore it, even though I could feel the blood coming out of my eyebrow.

No matter. Run, get Carl help. Run, faster.

Finally, after what felt like an hour, I finally crossed a line of trees and found myself in a large, empty field, a sumptuous farm home far ahead. This was it, the hunter who'd shot Carl was telling the truth. It made me run even faster now, no matter how tired I was and how dark the edges of my eyesight were getting. I jumped over a wooden fence that separated the field from the area near the house, and as I did, I saw people coming out of the house to stand on the porch, some female voice yelling. Getting even closer now, I saw a white-bearded man had a rifle in hand, even though he wasn't pointing it at me. I hoped this was the vet Otis had talked about.

"We need help!" I screamed even before stopping in the grassy area before the stairs that led to the porch. "Otis shot someone! A kid! He was hunting and shot a kid!"

Behind the white-bearded man there were two or three women, I couldn't remember because there were bright spots in my eyes now, and blood oozing into my left eye, and one of them said something like "He would never do that!"

"It was an accident. He shot the deer, didn't see the boy. Carl! Got shot right in the stomach! Please, we need help, Otis said you would help!"

"Where is Otis?" the man asked firmly.

"He's on his way, and Rick – the father, is bringing him, I ran ahead –"

"There they are," the other woman with a heavy southern accent pointed to the field. I turned and saw the small dot that was Rick carrying Carl, running as fast as he could.

"That's them!" I turned back to them, "That's Rick, the kid's his son, he's unconscious. Please! Otis said you're a vet, that you could help. Please!"

The man eyed me for another moment, watching me catch my breath, pleading in my bloody eyes – I wasn’t even seeing alright – then looked again at the field where Rick was getting closer and thought for a moment. Now, on the line of threes, we could see Otis appear, also running, Shane with him. Seeing Otis was safe, the man seemed to make a decision. He turned to the women on the porch and started giving instructions, both of them followed by a younger one rushing inside to get ready.

I could have cried in relief and breathed out heavily, bending to rest my hands on my knees, before practically crawling to go sit on the porch steps, head instantly falling between my knees as I caught my breath and my vision darkened a bit more.

"Are you okay?" a woman's voice came from behind me.

"Uh, I..." I paused and tried lifting my head, which was more difficult I'd imagined, and looked behind me a bit, seeing the girl standing there just slightly. "Not really... Cut myself. Feeling faint."

The girl said nothing more and I returned to my position, trying to control my body and mind and not fall unconscious when there was someone else who needed more help than me. Looking away, I saw Rick had just crossed the fence and was starting to get closer, Carl's dead weight slowing him down. I forced my body to get up as Rick got nearer.

“Inside,” I told him, trying to be firm but failing miserably. “Get him inside, they’ll help!”

Ricky was crying and wheezing with Carl limp on his arms, but still he moved on, a hopeful look at me as he climbed the stairs, crossed the porch and stormed into the farmhouse with me on his heels.

“In here!” we heard the farmer’s voice from a room and rushed in. “Put him on the bed,” the man ordered and Rick obeyed without a second thought. People around were working fast as the doctor instructed them, Rick and I just standing there among them, lost.

“Your name?” Rick stuttered, nearly unable to say his own name, but managed. “Rick, we’re gonna do everything we can, ok? You?”

I took a moment, eyes glued on Carl, to understand he was speaking to me. “What?” I looked at him.

“Your name?”

“Sam. I’m Sam.”

“Ok, now, Rick, Sam, you need to give us some space. You know his blood type?”

“A positive. Same as mine.”

“Yours?” Hershel asked me.

“I’m O neg. I’ll give it too.”

“No!” Rick surprised everyone by saying firmly, different from his own voice seconds ago. He looked around at people and explained, “She can’t donate. She’s pregnant.”

Hershel looked harder at me for a moment, still bent over to put pressure on Carl’s wound. “Maggie, you take Sam away. Take care of that cut and help her rest.”

“I’m fine!” I said immediately, a hand rising to wipe the blood from my eye. “Please don’t worry about me, Carl’s the one –”

“There’s plenty of people helping Carl,” Maggie told me as she approached and unceremoniously grabbed my hand. “Come on.”

“No, no, please, it’s fine, I’m okay!”

“Please Sam, we need you fine too…” Rick asked me, his voice tired and desperate, and I stopped. There was really nothing I could do in that room, even though I’d like nothing more than to help, and Rick was already too concerned and despairing too much to need to worry about me too. So I nodded, looked at Carl once again and huffed a breath before allowing Maggie to drag me out.

“You too Rick, we need space!” Hershel kept saying as I left. “But don’t go too far, we’ll need your blood.”

I barely noticed Otis cross by me, even though he did look desperately apologetic, he entered the room Rick and I left. Shane was there and went straight to Rick, holding him, wiping the blood from his friend’s face, but I was away from them, being sat on the dining room table in front of Maggie so fast I didn’t even see anything happening. The edges of my sight were growing darker again ad Maggie placed a bowl with water in front of me, cotton, bandages, and a bucket on the ground.

“You look like throwing up at any moment,” Maggie explained at my questioning gaze. “Here, have some water.”

“Lori doesn’t know… Lori doesn’t know!” Rick’s voice came from the next room.

“Who’s Lori?” Maggie asked me as I gulped on the water, only now noticing how terribly thirsty I’d been. I swallowed and dried my lips with the back of my hand, not seeing the dark smudge it left there.

“Carl’s mom…”

“There’s more of you?” Maggie said as she lifted a cloth to my face and stared wiping the blood.

“We got a group. We’re stuck on the road, we lost a girl, we’re looking for her. Lori’s with them, we were on the woods looking for Sophia and they are heading back to the road… Lori doesn’t know…”

“Why did I let him come with us?” Rick was crying, Shane knelt on the floor in front of him. “I should’ve sent him with Lori!”

Shane was saying things to him now but from across the room I couldn’t hear, and for the moment I couldn’t hear anything else because everything went dark and all the water I’d drank refused to stay in. Maggie was quick enough to grab the bucket for me to throw up in. I only faintly heard the door to the room being opened and Hershel calling Rick back in, saying he’d need the blood.

We all heard Carl then. He woke up and was screaming, loud, blood curling cries coming from inside the room and I make it to move, to instinctively get up and go there, but Maggie stopped me by pacing a hand on my forearm and shaking her head slowly. There was nothing I could do and I hated it, fuck, I hated it so much, that feeling of powerlessness, of uselessness. So I just stopped, feeling more tired than ever, tears silently escaping my eyes. Carl stopped after a while, surely passed out from pain.

“You need to rest,” Maggie told me and she replaced the bucket on the floor. “You ran all the way over here?”

“Yeah… Otis said it was two miles.”

“When was the last time you ate?”

“Sometime this morning…”

Maggie restarted cleaning my eyebrow and I didn’t have the energy to flinch with the alcohol there, but it did burn like hell. “I think you’ll need two or three stitches here.”

“Don’t, just… Put a band aid, it will close…”

“Dad will look at it later, I’ll just disinfect and cover for now. Try some more water, just little sips, don’t drink too fast.”

We went quiet as I did as Maggie said, my eyes closing tight as I fought another wave of nausea.

“Thank you…” I whispered weakly after a moment, resting the glass back on the table. “Carl… He’d be dead…”

“Don’t mention it. It’s a kid, we’d never leave him hanging.”

“We know Otis didn’t mean to.”

“We sure of that too. He’s a good man, Otis,” Maggie stated and I nodded, believing her. “How far along are you?”

“Oh, uh… Not really sure, but I guess around twelve weeks, thirteen?”

“You’ll have to eat something soon… I think we got some vitamins somewhere we can give you.

“You’re doing too much already... Maggie, right?”

“Yeah.

I tried a weak smile at her and we went quiet again as Maggie finished cleaning my cut and my face and covered it with a large patch, still encouraging me to slowly sip on the water. A few minutes later, Maggie brought me a clean shirt, because I still didn’t know, but mine would have to be thrown away, caked in blood. Rick came out of the room looking pale and sweaty and sat on the couch, Shane still close to him, and they argued about how to let Lori know what happened.

“He’s out of danger for the moment,” Hershel said as he opened the door and stopped at the threshold, whipping his hands in a towel. Everybody got up, even I did, with Maggie’s help, to hear him. “but I need to remove those remaining fragments.”

“How?” Rick’s voice shook as he asked. “You saw how he was.”

“I know, and that was the shallowest one. I’ll need to go deeper and get the others. There’s more… His belly’s distended, his pressure’s dropping, which means there’s internal bleeding. A fragment must have nicked one of the blood vessels. I have to open him up, find the bleeder and stitch it. And he can’t move while I’m in there. I mean, at all. If he reacts the same as before, I’ll sever and artery and he’ll be dead in minutes. To even try this, I’ll have to put him under, but if I do he won’t be able to breathe on his own. Same bad results.”

“What – You’d need one of those...” I said walking slowly to them, near the door. “A respirator, right? Like they use in hospitals?”

“Exactly that, but more. The tube that goes with it, extra surgical supplies, drapes, sutures.”

Otis reminded Mr. Greene that the nearest hospital had burned out recently but the local high school had once been used as a help center and should have all that stocked. It was overrun, though, but Shane offered to go there anyhow, quickly backed up by Otis, who affirmed he knew the place and he’d be able to navigate it better. His wife didn’t seem to want him to go, and I totally understood her, but he had all the right arguments. He felt responsible so he’d do all he could to help. I felt like going too, I knew there was nothing I’d be able to do here, but was realistic enough to know today I would be only a nuisance – and I hated it.

Maggie touched her my, distracting her from it, “Your group. Carl’s mom, where are they?”

“There were following the creek bed back to the road. We’re camped at the jam. They may be close to the road now.”

“I’ll go get her. What’s her name again?”

“Lori. Tell her Rick sent for her. But hey,” Maggie stopped as she was turning to leave. “The one leading them, Daryl. He won’t trust you, he won’t want to let Lori come. Tell him I said it’s fine.”

“That’s all?”

“Yeah, it will do.”

Maggie turned to leave and I saw myself alone in the living room, Rick having followed Hershel back inside the room with Carl. I slowly approached the door and leaned there, to see the boy’s small frame pale as a ghost, Rick holding his hand and Hershel taking his blood pressure.

“Take a seat, dear,” Otis’ wife told me and I startled a little before doing so, sitting in a chair close to the window. “How do you feel?”

Rick looked at me as I answered, “Faint… But I’ll manage. He’s more important now.”

“Not much else we can do right now, in fact…” Hershel said. “I can take a look at your cut now.”

“Maggie closed it, it’s small and cleaned. Please don’t worry about me.”

“Patricia, please go get these two something to eat. That leftover soup will be good sustenance for them now, especially Sam with child.”

The kind-looking woman nodded and left the room. Hershel exited as well, leaving us three in a heavy, tired silence.

“My boy was shot…” Rick started after a couple of minutes. I just looked at him, waiting. “He was just looking at a deer. And he was shot…”

“It was a terrible accident, Rick…”

“We just had to look for Sophia.”

“And we still are. We’ll deal with all this.”

“He shouldn’t have been there…”

“Don’t, Rick,” I said as firmly as I could. “There’s enough going on for you to start torturing yourself. None of this if your fault. Anyone of us could have been shot then, could have been you, could have been me. There’s no use thinking these things now.”

Rick looked from Carl to me, “How are you holding up?”

“I’m fine,” I said tiredly and rested my elbows on my knees, lowering my head. “People have got to stop worrying about me when there’s a shot child…”

“Your child’s as important as mine.”

“Mine’s unborn and is safe in here.”

“You ran all the way over here… May have saved Carl. Got them ready to help him,” he said and I looked up at him. “Thank you.”

I took a moment to answer, nodding slowly at him. “Is what we do, Rick. Kinda thing we gotta go for each other now. All of us.”

“We’re all together in this, ain’t we?”

“Yeah,” I tried a smile. “In the fuckin’ apocalypse, we’re all we got.”

[corpse--diem]

Girls Just Wanna Be Shady | Marley & Erin

With: @detectivedreameater

Some peace and quiet. That’s all Erin wanted out of this day. The past few weeks had bled into each other until they’d been a garble of panic, blood, and tears. God, she was tired of it. Tired in general, really, but the dead never slept. So here she was, thankfully, back to work. This was normal. A very normal distraction. Until she heard the old lift machinery kicking to life across the room. Dale? Wasn’t he a little early for his usual pick-up? Erin reached for the scalpel on the table beside her, silently cursing herself for not just buying a goddamn gun for herself. Apparently people just thought it was okay to keep on waltzing the fuck into her basement like they owned the place. But that wasn’t who the elevator door opened up to. A woman, dark hair, attractive, and definitely not Dale. But judging by the black bag behind her, she couldn’t help but wonder if she knew him. “Sure. Just walk right in. This isn’t trespassing at all,” she shrugged, that tight knit of anxiety still bundled in her gut. Glanced at the bag behind the woman. “I’m guessing you don’t have any official paperwork for this one?”

“It’s not trespassing if I have a key,” Marley said nonchalantly. The bag behind her was slumped against the wall, the bitter remains of an old balam who had passed away in the middle of the night. She’d underestimated the strength of his heart, and found herself woefully stuck with a dead body at 2am. But it was okay, because Jack Nichols owed her one. Except, she suddenly found herself staring at someone else. Younger, attractive, nice cheekbones. Marley even pulled her sunglasses off, her red eyes glowing in the dim light of the basement she’d visited so many times. “Oh, shit,” she said, suddenly, “he’s dead, isn’t it?” She finally stepped off the elevator, glancing around. “You his daughter, then? He mentioned you a few times. Though he never mentioned how much nicer looking you are than him.” She gave a little smirk before pointing to the bag. “It’s a balam. Lots of good kitty parts in there for you to harvest. You...do still do this, right? I don’t have to like, re-uhhh...up our deal?” Slid her jacket back just enough to show the badge on her hip, giving Erin an innocent smile.

Erin did hear what this woman had to say. The words processed and sat there, waiting for her brain to react. But she was stuck staring at the red eyes she so nonchalantly revealed to her. Right. She was still talking. She knew her dad. Didn’t know her dad was dead though. Well, for good this time. Still fucking haunting her, apparently. “You have cats in there?” She narrowed her eyes. Balam. Was that a type of cat? Didn’t click right away that the bag was far too big for some housecat. When she flashed that badge, Erin actually felt her knees buckle, her chest tightening, like the wind had just been knocked out of her. Fuck this. This woman was a cop. It was over. Fuck fuck fuck. She’d be better, Erin remembered promising herself. She’d be better than he was. She wasn’t a coward. Not even close. It took a moment to gather her thoughts but she stood a little taller than before, meeting the red eyes watching her very carefully. “Jack’s dead, yeah. You’ll have to refresh me on that deal you two made. He didn’t exactly leave a lot of notes in his will about this side of the business, as you can probably imagine.”

“No, not cats,” Marley snapped, a little irritated. “A balam. It is in cat form, ironically, though. He woke up and freaked out and changed. Dumbass.” Clearly Erin didn’t know as much as her father did. Made Marley wonder if he was trying to get her out of this business when he kicked the bucket. In fact, he probably kicked the bucket trying that. He had too many clients for that to happen. The Nichols family was going to be in this business for generations to come, Marley was sure. “Hmm, poor Jack. My condolences, or whatever. Although, maybe not? Doesn’t seem like he left you a good deal, exactly. If you’re not...aware of all this.” She leaned up against the cadaver table and folded her arms across her chest. “Our deal, is that he takes care of anything I bring him, no questions asked, and I make sure the police don’t poke their noses where they shouldn’t belong in his business. All the profits from this little venture have to be swept under a run somehow, right?”

This woman had some nerve getting annoyed with her when she’d showed up unannounced with a sack of dead whatevers in tow. Erin rolled her eyes at her flippant condolences, though didn’t move from her side of the table, tightly squeezing the scalpel just out of her sight. As if attacking her would do anything but escalate her trouble with the police, it made her feel safer. Not by much, though. “He did one fucking thing right, at least,” she sighed out heavily. Protection went a long way, especially through law enforcement. Finally, she set the tool down, covered the decedent she’d been working on, and pulled off her gloves. “Sounds like a good deal, honestly,” she said, making a genuine effort to make her tone friendlier. She needed this connection like she needed air. Came around to the elevator before dragging her eyes back up to the other woman. “Erin,” she nodded at her, offering her a hand. They were business partners now afterall. “You’re right. He didn’t. Seems like I get a fun new surprise every day. But it’s nothing I can’t handle, I assure you” she smiled, then turned her head to the body. “Mind giving me a hand?”

Marley watched Erin closely, watched her face cycle through the emotions, as she was trying to decide what the best course of action here was. It was, of course, to agree to the deal again. Otherwise the police would be in this house tomorrow and they’d find everything they’d need to convict Erin for four lifetimes. Still, it was ultimately her decision to make. Marley wouldn’t take that away from her. Even if it was a rigged deal. “Hey, gotta make sure the business is protected, right?” She smiled finally, a genuine smile, though it looked a little out of place on her face. “Detective Stryder. But you can call me Marley.” She took Erin’s hand firmly, letting her feel how cold her own was. After a moment, she pulled away and looked at the body bag still in the elevator. “Jack never made me help, you know,” she said, glancing sideways at Erin, “didn’t he usually have a squirrely assistant around? Or am I thinking of someone else?” She shrugged. “Well, for you, I suppose I can help.”

“It’s a pleasure,” Erin nodded, noting her hands were colder than her own usually were. It was weird hearing her father’s name being thrown around in casual conversation like this. “Uh--Allen?” Erin cleared her throat, avoiding Marley’s eyes as she leaned down, grabbing the bag by the head. Whatever was in here, cat-people or otherwise, was heavy. Heavier than a human corpse usually was. “Much appreciated,” she groaned as she spoke, dragging the bag with her towards an empty table until she couldn’t go much further without Marley’s help. “My dad, uh--let him go,” she explained quickly, not really in the mood to dive into that zombie hell storm she’d just escaped from. “What if I promised whiskey for your generous assistance? I have that, and lots of it,” She caught her breath, raising a brow at Marley, hands on her hips. Smiled a little more genuinely this time and leaned down to grab the bag again. “I have a feeling his partner-relations skills needed a little work but I do try to please.”

“Allen!” Marley said, giving a snap and a headshake. “That’s right. Little weird Allen. Squirrely fella. Sad to hear he’s gone.” She shook her head, still not moving, finding it entertaining to watch erin try and drag the bag across the room herself. She gave a little chuckle. “Now you’re talking my language,” she finally pushed away from her spot and came over to where Erin was, leaning down and grabbing the feet. “On three,” she said, hefting the body up with her at the end of the count. It thudded loudly onto the table and Marley gave it a satisfying slap. “I think you’ll find this one full of lots of good parts. Poor fella woke up during a feeding and thought turning into a cat of all things would help him. Obviously, it didn’t.”

Ah, yes. Poor little weird Allen. He’d never been Erin’s favorite but not even he had deserved to go down at the wrong end of his dead ex-employer. As loyal as he’d been to her father, it seemed mildly appropriate after the fact. She blew out a hard breath after the bag was squarely on the table. “A cat,” Erin echoed, the disbelief evident in her voice. “I don’t know why I’m surprised anymore. I’ve already got two werewolves under my belt,” she gave a wry smile. Not entirely ready to dive right into it, she turned to the cabinet across from her and pulled out two glasses and a bottle of whiskey. “Hope you don’t mind it neat. I wouldn’t use the ice down here,” she glanced up as she poured one for the detective, handing it off. Quiet for a moment as she raised the glass to her lips. “So,” she watched her, gesturing towards Marley. “Are we going to talk about the red eye thing you’ve got going on here or are we just brushing that under the rug too?”

“Cat, jaguar,” Marley rolled her shoulders, gave a shrug, “same thing, right? They’re just bigger cats. Though, I’ve always had a fondness for cats. They’ve never liked me, though.” She frowned, remembering all the times animals had hissed or barked and snapped at her. Not that she cared. Of course she didn’t. She looked back over at Erin, pocketing her sunglasses. “Neat is my second favorite way to enjoy whiskey,” she said with a grin, taking the glass gratefully. Sipped it just as Erin spoke her question. Finally. Marley had wondered how long it would take. It was usually the first thing people asked. She could’ve bothered to keep them covered, but there was no point here. Erin, like Jack, was someone Marley didn’t have to hide her true nature from. At least, she hoped Erin was like that. “Do you like them? I’ve been told I have very alluring eyes,” she teased, setting her glass down and sauntering over to Erin. “Wanna see why?”

Jaguar? Erin flinched at the thought of what she was going to uncover under that zipper, opting to take a large sip of the whiskey she’d poured for herself instead. There was something about the detective that unnerved her--the red eyes didn’t help, sure, but there was more to it than that. It was almost like watching a sarcastic, attractive villain slither around and get under the hero’s skin. Erin was far from a hero, but Marley was certainly finding a way in. Her gaze never left Marley’s, standing firmly in place, even when she grew closer. They had a deal, and she’d given the woman whiskey for crying out loud. She wouldn’t hurt her. Probably. Hopefully. She swallowed, her heart pounding harder than before. “They’re pretty unique,” she teased back, a small smirk on her lips. “I do. But why does it feel like I’m going to regret this?”

“Oh, don’t worry,” Marley said, noticing the way Erin was looking at her as she made her way over. “I’m not gonna hurt you. I like you, and I don’t hurt people I like.” In all honesty, she also didn’t like hurting people just to hurt them. She used her powers to get what she wanted and what she needed, and that was it. It was never just about hurting people. She glanced down at Erin’s shirt, making sure not to look her in the eyes just yet. “But you are going to regret it, probably,” she said, before finally looking back up and meeting her gaze. The petrification would have been instant, her body freezing place, before red eyes consumed her and whatever fear she’d been hiding deep inside her chest burst forth. Marley’s arms tingled as she filled with excitement. She wanted to know what Erin’s fear was, but she’d stay out of it this time. This would be both a demonstration...and a warning. Of what stepping out of line might do.

Erin barely had a chance to blink before all she saw was red. The room around her faded to black, her body frozen. But all she saw, all she felt was red. Suddenly she was standing in the embalming room alone. The red morphed into flashing red lights, bouncing off of the walls. Police lights. Sirens screaming from outside. An icy chill punched her in the spine when she heard the door burst open upstairs. Dozens of footsteps thundered above her. Oh no. Oh fuck. Dread and crippling shame consumed her, made it hard to breathe. Handcuffs were slapped on her wrists and she was fighting them, as if this would suddenly change her fate. It only made the reporters lining her lawn all the more eager to shove their microphones in her face. “No!” She finally yelled, digging her heels in at the sight of the cop car. Her heart pounded, chest tightening, and she could feel the burning in the back of her eyes. “Stop!”

Marley didn’t look, this time, at what the fear was. She didn’t need to know in order for this to work. She barely even fed. This was just a display. Erin’s plea to stop was enough for her to blink and step away, putting her glasses back on. Not that she felt bad, but Erin wasn’t anywhere near as fun to toy with as Deirdre or other high stakes people. She had just wanted to give her a little taste. A little warning. Once Erin had stopped panting and come out of her vision, Marley held out her cup of whiskey to her. “You okay now?” she asked, concern in her voice. Whether or not it was genuine wasn’t relevant. She didn’t want to have to use that one Erin. Her father had reacted in a similar manner, after all. And he’d never stepped out of line after. “I told you it was special.”

Erin could have sworn she felt the officer’s hand on the back of her head, guiding her into the back of the car when reality came rushing back. Her legs hadn’t caught up with her mind, buckling beneath her as she struggled to hold onto the table beside her to keep from completely falling on her ass. “What the fuck?” she whispered coarsely. “Yeah, real fucking special. What are you?” she grumbled. Closed her eyes, shaking her head, trying to let the cool concrete under her knees ground her again. She didn’t know what the fuck Marley was but she sure as shit wasn’t going to make that mistake again. When she was finally able to stand without shaking, she took the drink and gulped it back in one go. Avoided eye contact completely as she went right for the whiskey bottle, the glass clinking against her cup. Wasn’t about to dig into the balam with her hands shaking like this anyway.

Marley frowned a little. “Didn’t your dad ever teach you not to ask a lady what she is?” she said, quirking a brow. “Or was he too busy selling organs on the black market?” It was meant to be a light-hearted tease, but Marley often got those moments wrong. “Too...too soon?” she asked, watching Erin pour another glass of whiskey for herself. She gave a soft chuckle. “I’m going to trust that you’ll never tell anyone this, but--” she put her glasses back on, just to comfort her. Most people didn’t know that mara could control when they caused the fear, and Marley wanted to keep it that way. “I’m something called a mara. Living nightmares, fear incarnate-- yadda yadda. Anyway,” she downed the rest of her drink and held the glass out for Erin to fill up again, “we feed on fear. Mostly by making people see visions of what they fear most, or through nightmares.”

Was Marley seriously trying to joke around with her right now? Unbelievable. Erin finally lifted her eyes to the other woman once the glasses were back on, nursing that second glass of whiskey. “Too soon,” she answered, blunt and annoyed now, though that was mostly the residual fear talking. Mara. Fear and nightmare machines. She nodded her head slowly at Marley’s explanation, watching the amber liquid glide along the edges of the glass. “You could’ve just said that,” she grumbled, taking another long sip out of her new glass. Stared at the glass Marley held out for her to refill, trying to think of anything but what she’d just experienced. Because of Marley. “I won’t tell anyone,” she finally answered, reaching for the bottle and pouring it into her cup. “But if you pull that shit on me again, I’d like to remind you who has the keys to the crematory,” she raised a brow, her tone playful. Mostly.

“Sure, I guess,” Marley shrugged, “but where’s the fun in that? People need to relax more around here.” Humans were always complaining about how “horrible” it was experiencing their fears. Fear was a natural thing, a natural emotion. They needed to get over it, really. It was a shame supernaturals held their fear better. Sighing, Marley took her drink back and sipped it. “Yeah, yeah, mutual destruction and all that. I’ll keep it in mind, Morticia,” she agreed, giving a little smile. “But don’t worry, I’m not interested in feeding off of you, I’ve got plenty of others lined up for that. But if you ever wanna have a healthy dose of fear, hit me up.”

Erin shook her head. “That wasn’t fun. Rock climbing? Kayaking? That’s fun,” she said, vaguely gesturing towards Marley’s sunglasses with the hand holding her whiskey. “You keep that shit away from me.” Police sirens flashed behind her eyes again and she finished off the rest of her drink. Her cheeks already were already flushed, from both the nightmare Marley had just unleashed on her and the large amount of alcohol she’d consumed in a very short time. Neither of those things, as much as she hated the first, were stopping her from thinking about how attractive a dangerous woman like she was. God, she needed another drink. She turned, pouring another, thankful the shaking in her hands were calming. “Yeah, I won’t be forgetting that anytime soon.” She cleared her throat, keeping her back towards Marley, quiet for a long moment before she turned slightly. “Is that everything, then?”

Marley frowned. No one understood. No one ever would. Just like everyone else in her life, it seemed like Erin didn’t want anything to do with Marley’s abilities, either. The only person she’d met so far that had was Evelyn, and there was still the tentativeness there, on whether Evelyn would ever end up rejecting her, too. Marley looked away, taking another hearty sip. “Fine,” she finally muttered, then brushed it all off. No sense in pouting about it. It wouldn’t change anything. “But rock climbing? That how you get your-- pun intended-- rocks off?” Shaking her head, she finished off her drink, “Yeah, we’re done here.” She reached back into her jacket pocket and pulled out a card. “If you ever wanna have some real fun, hit me up,” she said, setting it on top of the body bag on the table, before heading back over to the elevator.

[crossbows-and-moonshine]

Let The Flames Begin (Chapter 27)

I think you guys might really like this one ;)

The majority vote for my edit for the new banner was the 3rd one so here it is. If you have no idea what I’m talking about, I picked a face claim and made some edits, go see my post before this one if you wanna.

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Daryl was sulking in his tent. He knew he was being ridiculous, but he couldn't bring himself to show his face. He had lashed out at her, said sorry, then acted like a jealous bastard and lashed out again. He hadn't seen her in the hours since. She hadn't made any move to go to him like she usually would and talk to him. It was dinner time now and Daryl didn't have any desire to go out there. She had called him out, right to his face. Asking if he was jealous. Did she fucking know? It was making him want to rip his damn skin off and he couldn't get out of his head. He could hear the faint murmur of conversation as the group sat around the fire eating. The paranoia kicked in then. What if they convinced her she was better off without him and Merle? He knew they had both been assholes in the group and he doubted it would take much convincing for her to not want anything to do with them. Not after his outburst earlier. What if they were telling her all the shit they had done since they got here? Got in her head? The more he sat there the more paranoid and angry he got.

He opened the tent and got out, stomping over to the fire. His steps slowed though when he saw the group. Charlene was sat next to Merle, the pair having a quiet conversation and not bothering with anyone else. Relief flooded him and seeped into his bones. He didn't know why he was acting like this. Merle caught his eye and gestured with his head to come over. And despite the desperate need to flee, his feet carried him over and he sat on the other side of Charlene. She didn't even look at him and he felt the pit on his stomach growing rapidly. She fucking hated him now, he just knew it. He could hardly blame her. She had been nothing but nice to him since before all this and all he ever did was treat her like shit because he couldn't get his shit together. Merle passed him some rabbit meat and he ate it, keeping his head lowered as he just brooded and wondered why he couldn't do a thing right.

“Shane told me Daryl said you two are together, how did you meet?” Lori piped up with a warm smile. Daryl felt the air leave his lungs as his eyes snapped up. Everyone became quiet like they were eager to know the answer. They probably were since they liked to gossip about bullshit. He swallowed thickly, the meat feeling like it was expanding in his throat as he tried to push it down and he felt Merle’s eyes on him.

“I used to work at a diner. He came in on his lunch break one day and it was love at first sight,” Charlene said, a smile on her face that Daryl knew was fake. He blinked slowly, his brain seeming to be in slow motion as he was trying to process it. She was going along with it. But he had no doubt she would kick his ass later for it. He was just grateful she hadn’t called him out in front of everyone.

“Aw, that's so romantic,” Amy piped up with a wide grin.

“How long have you been together?” Andrea asked as she looked at them both. Daryl had no idea why people were so interested in his personal life, even if it was a fake one. Like people were so interested in how the asshole hunter of the group had a girl he cared about.

Charlene turned to look at him then, giving him an amused look as she quirked a brow and he raked his teeth over his lower lip. The little shit was making him answer and he was a little confused why she didn't look mad, she looked like she found it funny.

“About two years,” he shrugged, trying to act casual as he lied through his teeth.

“You always do this, two and a half years,” Charlene huffed, glaring at him as she pretended to be mad at him. Merle snorted next to her and Daryl didn't know whether to laugh or cry at the situation he found himself in. The girl seemed to be having way too much fun watching him squirm.

“I told ya I don't count the first half a year since ya were sleepin’ around,” he said, fighting a smirk as she squinted at him.

“Well maybe if you satisfied my needs I wouldn't have had to sleep with other people,” she retorted, quirking a brow. The group was watching amused, unaware that all of it was bullshit and Merle was grinning as he ate his food. Daryl felt his cheeks flush as he glared at her and she gave him a toothy grin.

“Aw don't be mad, you’re still my big snuggly bear,” Charlene grinned leaning over and kissing his cheek. It felt like his face fucking exploded with tingles and he tried so hard to ignore the feelings it was giving him from a simple fake kiss.

“Snuggly bear?” Dale asked amused, glancing to Daryl. He groaned inwardly and lowered his head. Every fucker here was smirking at him and he wanted the ground to open up and eat him alive. Where's a damn biter when ya need one? He should have stayed in his damn tent.

“Mhm, he loves to snuggle, don't you baby?” she asked with a smirk. He pursed his lips a little, looking at her with narrowed eyes.

“Sure do, wild cat,” he said dryly.

“Do we even want to know that one?” Andrea asked with a snort.

“Prolly not, the shit she likes me to do to her in bed…” he smirked, watching as Charlene’s jaw dropped and her cheeks flushed, glaring at him. Merle laughed and choked on his food, smacking himself in the chest as he tried to calm himself.

“Okay! That's enough of this conversation!” Lori chuckled, standing up and ushering Carl away. Daryl just raised a brow at Charlene and she squinted.

He got up since he had eaten his food and went back to the tent. After Charlene bid Merle goodnight she unzipped it and got inside.

“Oh look, it's my snuggly bear,” she snorted, shaking her head as she sat down and tugged off her boots.

“Bet ya real proud of yaself with that one, makin’ the group think I’m a fuckin' laughin’ stock,” he huffed, glaring at her from where he was sat.

“You're the one that said we were together,” she shrugged.

“Yeah, to make Shane keep his eyes off ya,” he scoffed as he got his sleeping bag ready. Charlene looked to him quizzically.

“What if I wanted his eyes on me?” she questioned, looking at him intently. Daryl clenched his jaw as his eyes snapped up to hers. The thought alone made him feel murderous and it felt like his blood was molten lava running through his veins. Charlene just watched him carefully. Testing the waters almost to see his reaction. If she didn't know any better she would say he was jealous, and that just confused her.

“Ya want that prick?” he scoffed bitterly, glaring daggers at her.

“Not really. Had my eye on someone else for a while now but I’m pretty sure he's not interested,” she muttered. She took her jacket off, feeling Daryl's eyes on her the whole time as she moved over to him. She presumed they were sharing the sleeping bag since they always seemed to sleep next to one another.

Daryl eyed her warily, the fuck had that meant? For a while? The only people she had been with was him and his brother and he had been certain she didn’t like Merle that way with how she acted around him. Charlene glanced at him, noticing his weird look as he didn't say a word. She heaved a sigh, shaking her head. This was useless, she would never get an answer like this out of him and she was sick of tiptoeing around shit. When she got lost, her biggest regret was always not telling him how she felt.

“For fuck sake Daryl it’s you!” she huffed, her cheeks flushing bright red at finally saying it out loud. After all these years of admiring him, trying to talk to him, she had finally told him she liked him. She couldn't even look at him, waiting for him to laugh or something as she lay down facing away from him. Daryl sat there staring at her. Did I just hear right? He must have heard wrong, it wasn't possible.

“I...uh...ya had…” Daryl couldn’t even form a fucking sentence, his brain turning into mush as her words swirled around his brain on repeat.

She turned over, blinking those pretty green eyes at him as he opened and closed his mouth like a fucking fish.

“I don't expect you to say anything and if it made you awkward I'm sorry. But there it is. I've liked you for fucking years Daryl. I’m not stupid enough to think you'd ever want a girl like me, but I needed to get it off my chest,” she admitted, toying with her hands as her cheeks stayed flaming red. Daryl looked more than confused as he wiped a hand over his face.

“So...just to be clear...ya like me but ya think I ain't ever like ya back?” he asked slowly, sounding so bewildered. She rolled her eyes and sat up to look at him better. This was ridiculous. She shouldn't have said anything, now things would be weird between them. She shouldn’t have opened her big fucking mouth.

“I know you don't Daryl. And it's fine. I made my peace with it a long time ago that you wouldn't like me back that way,” she muttered, glancing up at him through her lashes. She was right in front of him and he swallowed thickly. He didn't really know what the fuck was going on. He must have woken up in some alternate reality or some shit for her to be saying she liked him that way. And he had no idea why she thought he wouldn't like her back. He was willing his mouth to move, to fucking say something. To tell her how he had liked her for years, how he would go to see her at work just so he could see her smile. But nothing was coming out. His brain and his mouth had disconnected and he couldn't make his mouth work.

Charlene frowned, looking down with a sigh. She knew she had ruined whatever friendship they had built between them. He hadn't said a word and he looked flustered and uncomfortable.

“I’m sorry, okay? I’ll just...I’ll go stay in Merle tent,” she mumbled embarrassed, going to get up.

“What? No! I just…” he clenched his jaw, getting overwhelmingly angry at himself. Why was it so hard to say it out loud? That he liked her back? She watched him warily, unaware of the tense battle in his head. His eyes met hers and she swallowed thickly at the look he gave her, it made her feel so small under his gaze.

“Fuck it,” he muttered, leaning forward and capturing her lips with his. It caught her off guard and she squeaked a little, tensing at the suddenness of it. He felt his heart drop at her reaction and he went to move away. But she grabbed the back of his neck, stilling him so he couldn't pull away. He felt her kiss him back then and his heart was thumping wildly in his chest. He was finally fucking kissing her, finally tasting those sweet full lips. She deepened the kiss a little and he felt a growl rumble low in his throat. His tongue ran along her lower lip, wanting more of her, wanting every damn inch of her fucking mouth. He was pleased when she complied, moving closer to him as he tangled his tongue with hers.

He pulled her onto his lap, much like he had done earlier and she wound her arms around his neck. He just got lost in her, kissing her breathless until he needed to come up for air. His chest was heaving when he pulled away, looking up at her hesitantly like he expected a smack. Her cheeks were flushed and her lips slightly swollen from his kisses and it was a look that sent a surge of primal satisfaction through his body.

“Well...that was unexpected,” she snorted, looking down bashfully. His lips turned up into a shy smile, now the moment had gone he felt incredibly shy and out of place. She nibbled on her lower lip, making no move to get off his lap and his hands were splayed on her back. She was looking at him with a slightly hooded gaze and he never thought in a million years she would look at him like that. She leant down slightly, her lips ghosting his. Butterflies erupted in his stomach, making his breathing hitch a little. He nudged her nose with his and a small smile graced her lips. He closed the distance between them, already needing another taste of her as he claimed her mouth.

It felt surreal. How many times had he thought about doing this? Too many to count. And each time he would be reminded it would never happen. Yet here he was. The pretty green-eyed girl in his lap making out with him. He couldn't get enough of her as he pulled her closer, greedily kissing her like he needed it to breathe. He pulled away again just for the sheer need to breathe and she rested her forehead on his, closing her eyes.

“So...this means you like me back right?” she asked with a wry grin. He snorted, looking up at her.

“I don't know, maybe ya should kiss me again, help me make my mind up,” he smirked, his southern drawl seeming to be thicker, his voice deeper. It sent a thrill right through her as she looked down at him. She gave him a mischievous grin as she leant down, nipping his lower lip and tugging on it a little. A low groan left his lips as he closed his eyes. Damn girl would be the death of him teasing him like that. He gripped the back of her neck firmly, crashing his lips to hers in a desperate kiss.

If it was anyone else, he would have had their clothes off and be balls deep inside of them with how horny he was, but he wanted to take things slightly slow with her. He didn't want to rush it. They had only just found out they both liked each other after all and that alone made his head spin. He moved away, squeezing his eyes shut.

“Shit Peaches, we need to stop,” he groaned, looking pained at even having to say those words. She nodded though, she knew he was right. She could have done with a cold shower right about then. She didn't want to go too fast, she didn't think she was quite ready for that yet. She reluctantly moved from his lap as the pair tried to catch their breath. Daryl felt a little awkward now. He didn't know what this really meant. Sure they had kissed but he wasn't sure what the next move was. She smiled shyly at him, laying down, so he decided to follow her lead. He lay on his back and smiled inwardly when she laid her head on his chest. They had slept next to each other a lot, and he had spooned her once or twice without meaning to in his sleep. But now she snuggled into his side willingly, wide awake and knowing what she was doing. His chest felt all weird at the feelings it was giving him. He still couldn't quite wrap his head around what the fuck just happened. His arms came around her, pulling her closer to him as he shut his eyes. He felt like he would wake in the morning and it had all been a dream. There was no way Charlene liked him that way, it was absurd to him.

“Stop thinking too hard,” she mumbled tiredly into his chest. He snorted lightly and glanced down at her, the tips of his ears turning pink that she just seemed to know. He decided she was right though. He could overthink shit tomorrow. Tonight he would just relish in the feeling of the girl in his arms. The feeling of his lips still tingling from their kisses. Everything else could wait until the next day.

-----------------------

Arrrrgh you guys!! You have no idea how eager I was to post this one looool

Taglist; @risingphoenix761 @daryldixonandfrogs @arlaina28 @divadinag @keeperofwonderlandus @jodiereedus22 @easnuppa @fand0m-fiend @txladyj-blog @walkingdead-dixon

[gremlinkweenarchive-blog]

First Burn

A/N: So like I know this was NOT on my schedule at ALL but this song came on shuffle and I was inspired so enjoy this absolute pain. Listen to this song for an extra dose of pain. If you know Hamilton, then you know what’s about to go down. 

Warnings: Angst, cheating, mentions of a marriage ending with kids, drinking when upset, but that’s about it

Word Count: 3 K

Tag List: @langdonsinferno, @americanhorrorstudies, @ccodyfern, @michael-langdon-owns-my-soul, @codyfernss

If you knew what today would bring you, you would have stayed in bed all day long, maybe for the rest of your life. It started as any typical Monday, breaking the illusion of free time the weekend brought was always the hardest, but feeling your husband squeeze you tight made you smile. Duncan kissed your neck and you cuddled into him further. 

"I don't want to get up," you mumbled. 

"Then stay in bed, dear. Take the day off, you deserve it." 

You sighed as he finally opened your eyes and looked up at the ceiling. "You know I can't do that. Neither can you, Mr. Secretary of Treasury." You poked his stomach and he let out a little chuckle though it didn't sound as lively as he usually was. You went to roll out of bed, but he caught you, holding you in bed. 

"What?" You chuckled. 

"Just know that I love you." 

Your brow creased. Duncan looked more serious than you've seen him in awhile. "Yeah, you weirdo, I know that." 

He leaned up to kiss you. Something sweet and sleepy, but full of love and passion. With that, the both of you got up and got ready for the day. Both of you in suits, and he was staring off into space rather than eat his breakfast when your nanny, Elise, showed up for the morning. You sighed in relief and handed her one of the twins. 

"Thank you, Jack is so fussy this morning and I don't know why," you complained and she smiled.

"Babies have their moods just like adults."

They were your first borns, and this woman made a living rearing children, so you believed her. 

"Seems to be Jack's not the only one in a mood," she remarked about Duncan, who seemed to be lost in his thoughts. 

"Like father, like son I guess," you chuckled, though you were worried about your husband, but you trusted him to come talk to you when he was ready. You figured it had to do with those nasty rumors flying around about Duncan abusing the power of his position. You knew that was crazy talk. He'd never, but already having stared prison down the barrel once, you didn't blame his aversion to these types of rumors. 

He got up, without touching his breakfast and kissed Jack and Eva goodbye before giving you one last kiss and hug. The kiss seemed to last forever and once he pulled away, you gave him a smile, but worried was plain as day on your face. 

"I love you," he whispered. 

"I know you do," you smiled a little more genuinely. That was your little way that you said I love you back, but it also said that he could relax, things weren't as horrible as he thought they were. 

He left for the day, and you finished getting ready as Elise got the children settled down. 

-------------------------------------

You entered the boardroom on your floor. There was a case that you and your team were meeting for. You saw everyone glued to the T.V. as you walked in, sipping your thermos of coffee. 

"Come on folks," you didn't even look to the screen, you were tossing your jacket on a chair and setting your briefcase down, "I've got partner to make at this god-forsaken law firm, and I'll be damned if Dale makes it before I do." 

"Umm, Mrs. Shepard," one of your interns spoke, "You should watch this." She turned up the volume, and you looked up. 

Shock flooded your system seeing your husband on screen. You read the running banner and it didn't make sense. You read it again.... And again. Sound faded out as you read the banner yet again. 

"Secretary of Treasury Shepard admits that the suspicious emails and what appeared to be a skimming scam, was in fact a hidden affair." 

You blinked, and you couldn't believe it, but then you heard his words coming from the screen. 

"While this act is inexcusable, and I deeply sorry for the pain this causes my personal life, and my family, but I never put the integrity of my position or my department on the line..." 

That's all you cared to listen to. Your stomach as flipping. He chose his job, the world over you. You felt like you were going to be sick or pass out, or maybe both. Your intern grabbed your arm. 

"Do you want to go home?" She asked you, her eyes were clearly concerned and you nodded.

"Then let's go, the media's going to be swarming this place any second." 

She wasn't wrong, and she helped you by grabbing your things and darting off. 

"I'll be sure to send someone over with your car later." 

In the emotion fog, you had one clear thought run through your head. Remember to hire this girl when she graduated. 

There were already camera crews in the car garage when you stepped out of the elevator. You kept a stoic face. You heard clamoring, begging for comments. One aggressive reporter managed to get in your face and making you stop. 

"Do you have any comments about the news press your husband held this morning." 

Without even thinking, you answered, "Fuck off, bitch," before you pressed past, getting into your interns car. You were sure to hear about that one from your bosses later, but if they couldn't understand that your husband announced to the world that he cheated on you without even telling you first, then they would just have to deal with it. 

The drive was silent, and you were surprised that you weren't crying. It didn't feel real. This had to be some awful dream, you were going to wake up any minute. You were lost in your thoughts, but she pulled up to your drive way much quicker than you thought. 

"Thank you, Elizabeth," your voice as thick. Your face was wet and you touched your cheek. Apparently, you were crying. 

"Are you going to be okay, Mrs. Shepard?" 

That name used to bring you joy, a little surge of excitement every time you heard it, even just this morning before this horrific news, you felt a twinge of joy when she addressed you as such. 

"Just, Y/N, Elizabeth. Don't call me that again." 

She nodded. 

"I'll see you when I go into work next." With that, you got out of her car, and walked up to your house. 

Elise greeted you and she knew. You could tell by the look on her face, trepidation, concern, pity, sadness, all of it. 

"There were people calling, looking for you, so I took the phone off the hook." 

You smiled, well, the most of what you could muster of one. She knew what to do before you even knew the situation. 

"Uhh, Elise?" 

"Yes, Ma'am?" 

"Can you take the kids to my mother's house? I don't..." You didn't know what to say. You just didn't want them there. You wanted your space to process. Get whatever you needed to do without having to worry about your children or scaring them. They were too young to understand this anyway. They were just babies, and and maybe, just maybe you wanted to punish Duncan a little. 

"I understand, Ma'am. Just call me when you're ready to have them back. Take as much time as you need." 

You nodded and she left to go get the children ready for the day out.

You kissed your children before they left, and you waited for them to leave before you went to the liquor cabinet, and pulled out the George T. Stagg, pouring yourself a healthy glass. You didn't care if this was Duncan's 800 dollar bottle of bourbon. You were collecting your alimony early. 

Sitting down, you took a breath. This still felt like a nightmare that you were destined to wake up from any moment. You drank half of the glass in one go. This wasn't real. He didn't do that to you. He couldn't do that to you. He told you that he loved you this morning. Sure, he had been a little distant in the past, but he was on the fucking presidential cabinet. Late nights were apart of the deal. He had calls that he could take with you in the room. He needed to take trips for the weekend... Right? He needed all of that for work. He loved you. He only laid down in your bed. You were the only girl for him, he promised that to you. It didn't matter that his gaze lingered too long on your sister? It didn't matter that he never shrugged off a friendly touch from a woman, even if the contact lasted just a hair too long right? None of that mattered. It couldn't matter because he promised you. 

Oh God.

This was real. This was real. This was real. 

In a sudden fit of rage, you flung the glass against the wall and the delicate thing nearly exploded on impact, and a sob escaped your chest.

He did that to you. He did that to you. He told the world about his infidelity before he told you. He mangled your heart, and let the world see it before he showed you. It felt like your skin was crawling, everywhere he touched, felt dirty and you were crying so hard, you were nearly gagging and choking. 

You forced air into your lungs. You forced yourself to calm down. You didn't get so far in life because you broke at every little thing. 

Then again, this wasn't a little thing. You didn't let people into your heart, everyone betrayed you. Even your parents betrayed you, yet, you had met Duncan while you were in law school. He could make you laugh, he made your heart sing. You let him in. He made you believe that love was real again. You married him. You bore his children. You trusted him above all, and this is what he gave you in return. You were right, everyone would betray you, given the chance. 

The love you held for him was turning to ash in your mouth. You grabbed the bottle, fucking the glasses, and you took a healthy swig. 

You made your way up stairs, refusing to look at all the pictures of you and your family hanging up on the walls. You were afraid you would break looking at them. A family, happy and carefree, built on lies. 

You walked into your room, staring at the shared bed. The one that you conceived your children on, the one that was supposed to be sacred. You wondered if he fucked the other one on this bed while you were in London for business five months ago. You took another swig. Thank god for the 70% alcohol by volume on this thing. 

You weakly moved to the closet. You flipped on the light, feeling like a monster, no, not a monster, a corpse was in there, waiting for you to make it's grizzly discovery. There was a black box you hid behind your shelves. It was a sacred. It was the shrine you built to your relationship with Duncan. You saved every love letter, every card, memories of your firsts, anything and everything. You pulled it out from it's hiding spot and held it close to your chest. You took another swig before you put the bottle down to hold it closer. 

Time didn't hold meaning, who knows how long you were crying as you held that shrine, but you knew that your head hurt when you were done. The house was still silent, and it was beginning to feel more like a tomb than a home. You sniffled and picked up the bottle again, taking another swig. 

You grabbed a sweater and headed for the backyard. You got the fire pit ready for a fire, and you tossed a match on top, watching the flames erupt and consume the wood while you felt nothing. You sat down in front of it and gingerly opened the box. On top was the first love letter we ever wrote you. A week after you met him, you got it, and all he could do was gush about how you were the most beautiful woman he had ever met and he needed to know you more. 

A faint smile graced your face before the thought crashed through your head. "Not beautiful enough." 

You took another swig before you looked at the fire, then at the letter. Your eyes then moved every carefully pack to the fire as the course of action became clear. 

With a simple flick of your wrist you pushed the paper into the flames, seeing it consumed. There was no pleasure in this, but a conviction that you had to do this. You had to burn him out like an inflection. 

You knew it was dark before you were down with ready the letters and burning each one. You were beyond drunk now, but you didn't care. You just didn't want to feel anything, but your chest still felt like it was physically breaking as you watched the flames lick the air. 

You heard footsteps behind you, and you knew who they belonged to. You would always know who they belonged to. He was silent. Was there anything to say. 

He came closer cautiously. 

"What's this?" he asked softly as he grabbed the corpse of the shrine. 

You yanked the box away from him and tossed it to the flames. Better to burn it than to let him defile it further. 

"I kept all your old letters in there." You explained coldly, "I saved every letter you wrote me. Every last one, and when I was missing you, or when I was sad, or even when we were fighting, I'd read them and remember how much you love me." You let that hang in the air, and another wave of tears almost broke free, but you reigned it in. "I guess I was wrong though." 

"Y/N, please, let m-" 

"Don't," you held up your hand to stop him. There was nothing he could say to make this better. "You can stand over there and watch, but you are not making this better." She didn't trust him, she didn't trust herself that she could stay strong not to fall in his arms. 

"God," she scoffed and took another drink, "I don't even know who you are." 

"Come on, y-" 

You held up your hand again, and he stopped. You hated him in this moment, but god did you want him to hug you. You wanted him to make this better, but you knew he couldn't. 

"You told the whole fucking world that you brought her into our bed," a tear rolled down your cheek. "You cleared your name, but you have destroyed our lives. You understand that, right?" 

"You think I could let them think that I was abusing my position? Y/N, you know what I had to go through with my parents, I can't and won't just stand by and let people tear down my name,," he could hear he was pleading, but you didn't spare him a look. 

"Well, God forbid, that someone someone whispers against you!" You lashed out finally looking towards, "They whisper against you, and you have to scream!" You screamed the last part, a sob wracking your body. 

He went to hold you and you pushed his hands away, "Don't!" You sobbed, and covered your face. He was helpless to fix this. You both knew that. 

Finally, your sobs calmed down, and you looked at him again, that hate burning bright. "You want to know about whispers, Duncan? You want to know about whispers that destroy everything you worked for? I know how you look at my sister," you spat out. 

He went to speak, and for the third time, you spoke, "Don't." 

"I see how other women look at you. Don't you dare think I'm so naive. I see how they fall for your charms.You are just so goddamn charming. I was willing to write off that that was just you, but you always liked that, didn't you? You like their attention, and you are so fucking obvious sometimes, Duncan. " You had ignored the signs, and for that, you could only be angry at yourself. 

You shook your head, and you stood on uneasy legs. 

"What are you going to say to the press?" 

The question felt like a slap, always caring more about the world than his home. 

He felt that hatred hardening in your heart. "Don't worry," you said as you wiped your tears. "I won't say anything. I'll let the world wonder what I did when you broke my heart." 

You saw the pain in his eyes, he was crying too. You wanted nothing more than to wipe them away, then to pretend that this was okay. To make him feel better, but what then, of your broken heart? 

"You threw this all away, you know that, right?" 

"Yes." 

Her heart broke, but she had one last thing to say. "You know when the time comes Duncan, when Eva and Jack ask about what happened, why mom and dad aren't together, you are going to have to look them in eyes and explain the pain and the embarrassment you put their mother through? I'm not going to tell them. That is your sin to confess." 

You had might as well have slapped him across the face with how he looked at you. "Please, Y/N-" 

"Get out," you spoke coldly. 

"Ple-" 

"Get out of my house!" You screamed. You couldn't stand this anymore. 

He stopped and stared at you. Maybe it would have been kinder to slap him than to tell him that based on his face. He whipped his face, and nodded. "Alright, I'll go." 

[lovegvvd]

❝ She always had that about her, that look of otherness, of eyes that see things much too far, and of thoughts that wander off the edge of the world. ❞ SARAH PAULSON? No, that’s actually LUNA LOVEGOOD-SCAMANDER. Only FORTY-TWO years old, this RAVENCLAW alumni works as a MAGIZOOLOGIST and is sided with THE ORDER OF THE PHOENIX. SHE/THEY identifies as AGENDER and is a HALFBLOOD who is known to be ECCENTRIC, BLUNT, and UNSELF-CRITICAL but also NONCONFORMING, INNOVATIVE, and PERCEPTIVE.

LINKS: stats, pinboard, character tag. CHARACTER PARALLELS: orla mccool (derry girls), misty day (ahs), dale cooper (twin peaks), phoebe buffay (friends) HELLO once again a note from me mar, that a lot of this is open to discussion and alteration as i’m going off the little canon that i have and because luna is a character with a few already existing ties. so yep! this is all up for discussion! yeet! also i apologise for the length of the history section akdfhsdkjf. also i always forget that luna is married to rolf so pls remind me x

history

luna’s parents were traveling when they became pregnant with her and decided that they would settle in whatever place their child would come to earth --- a game of chance, perhaps, but one of fate, too, they thought. they’d always been dreamers, romanticists, adventurers, and why not let their child decided where they’d end up, even before her birth? and so they settled near a small town in south west england, where luna was born under a full moon and thus named luna. for the moon, that had followed her traveling parents everywhere they went, for the moon, the only thing that would be able to match their child’s powerful and mysterious spirit, for the moon, which she was born under.

the house they lived in was built by her parents, and luna loved it. the house twisted and curled and offered plenty of room for her imagination, from day one. life growing up was complete, was free, it was close to perfect ---- and yet, somehow, it shattered.

[ parental death, trauma tw ] at nine years old, luna watched her mother day. it was supposed to be a day of excitement --- every time her brilliant mother invented a new charm, they would have an extravagant dinner and celebrate until way too late and laugh widely and loudly. nothing like that happened. luna watched her mother die in stead and hammered on her chest to try and get her heart to start beating again but nothing, nothing, nothing worked. the world was a mystery and death was, too, but still one thing was clear: her mother was gone, in one way or another.

luna struggled to accept this truth, as she often did with truths. her father grew fragile and obsessive and she grew nervous and quiet and good at being on her own. she started painting and tried to combat flashbacks to that day during the day, only to have nightmares at night. having a wide imagination was a gift, most of the time, but with this, it was a curse.

luna was traumatised. simple as that. her father wasn’t the best support system, but he was there in a way. the roles of father-daughter shifted, slightly, as luna took care of him, too, but he was still there. and so the last two years before hogwarts were hard. terribly, horribly hard. it was trying to learn how to live in a house where something so vital was missing. it was tryign to understand what death was, which is something that simply refuses to be understood. it was fucking hard. period. (not that luna admits that to herself, even now.) [ end of tws ]

luna arrived at hogwarts and was sorted into ravenclaw very quickly and easily. she noticed that she was odd --- or, actually, other people noticed that she was and told it to her, and she shrugged her shoulders and kept moving on. luna had grown reclusive after the death of her mother, and didn’t mind not fitting in. it was lonely, sure, but she didnt see a reason to befriend people who looked down on her beliefs. she didn’t mind being called loony, but when her belongings started to disappear, she grew angry, deep down. she let most comments and acts of cruelty slide off her back, but when a bad word was muttered about her father ( who she already worried so so much about ), she was prone to explosion.

but she was lonely, and then she was not. the details are fuzzy, but at one point she found friends at hogwarts! finally! she did it! luna learned to come out of her shell, learned how to handle compassion ( though clumsily and in her own way, of course ) and the wonderous world of having friends. she painted them on her ceiling and loved and laughed and ---- things were good. she loved. she laughed. she wasn’t alone, and while she had never considered herself alone or lonely, it wasnt until she gained friends that she realised that she had been awfully alone.

upon graduation, luna took to the world. she traveled far and wide and learned from amazing, genius people across the world. she studied magizoology and wrote her first essay on a newly discovered species a year into her travels. she returned home often enough, of course, to see how her father was doing, to see her friends. friendship had once been a scary and new thing to luna, but as she grew older, it became natural and easy and something she couldnt do without.

at some point, she and fellow magizoologist rolf scamander got it going. they married, had a pair twins and a new chapter of luna’s life opened up. once again, the complete details about her and rolf meeting are fuzzy, but i imagine it was LIT. i do think she settled more, then, especially when the twins were born. luna hadn’t really had rooted herself down after graduation ( the cottage she owned in the hills of england was a home she barely called a home, as she wasn’t there much ), but that did change.

luna is still the person she was before, she’s just more. she’s more grounded, but not any less in love with keeping her eyes wide open and her head in the skies. she’s a parent. she’s married. she’s got a successful career and a group of people surrounding her that she loves. she has grown up, but she hasn’t compromised. she’s learned how to use perspective and how to be more subtle, without shedding eccentricity or open mindedness.

the quibbler, by the way, still exists and has grown into even more of an underground, activistic magazine. luna writes for it every month.

[ grief, death tw ] so things were going well, and then everything changed. grief came into her life again.  harry is dead – harry, one of her first friends, harry, who named his daughter after her, harry, who she loved. friendship is something incredibly important to luna — she painted the faces of her first ones on her bedroom wall, once — and when he died, she got scared by how grief took a hold of her. the first time she lost someone that significant to her, she was much younger, you see, and dealing with shock & trauma as well. this time, she was an adult, settled and grown up. she is more aware of her grief, and that is TERRIFYING.

she’s also less passive in her mourning. before, she was a kid. family friends visited and her father was on her side. now, she’s a parent, a friend; she visits the kids of friends in stead and sticks on ginny’s and everyone else’s side, in stead. luna might come across unfazed or disconnected from her pain, as she talks about it like she is, but she is not: she has her own way of mourning (as everyone does) and she can say some really Truthful and Raw shit at times.

she misses him so much. that’s what it boils down to. she misses him so fucking much. [ end of tws ]

of course she helps reinstate the order. there’s no question about it. luna doesn’t feel like a revolutionist or a soldier, but she does know how to fight, and she does know what is right. she’s good at strategy and defense, mostly, and at keeping spirits high and offering new perspectives.

so here we have luna: a parent, a fighter on the frontlines, a friend. she’s determined. she’s horribly saddened. she’s still herself, despite everything.

personality & tidbits

i think i already touched on this but i think it never hurts to repeat yourself so --- luna is a more grounded individual, at this point. she still has her head in the clouds, but her feet are standing solidly on the ground. she’s a dreamer, yes, but more of a realist, too. ( nothing like one of your best friends dying to make you realise how shit the world is, after all. ) luna isn’t very different from the luna we know in canon, but she’s matured. she’s more. she’s gone through a lot of positive development.

luna is constantly and always in awe of the friends and family she has, especially because she was so lonely for the biggest chunk of her youth. she’s extremely loyal and defensive of them.

luna is agender and has been aware of this for ... most of her life, really? she thinks gender is a big old construct and one she doesn’t want to apply to herself. if others do, she of course doesn’t mind or judge --- she’s veyr openminded when it comes to gender and sexuality. she prefers both she/her and they/them pronouns --- sometimes she doesn’t mind which one people use, and sometimes she will prefer one over the other.

is good at trying to keep up morale without it being an escapist ... kind of situation? offers fresh perspectives a lot, likes being a positive force and yes, sometimes it is easier to focus on the positive, and she will, then.

she really loves the stars and moon and astronomy and astrology!!! wow!!!!!!!

wears iconic outfits and we ALL know it

idk what more to write ive already written so MUCH

possible plots

first of all? i would love someone who can be kind of a mentee? because fuck yeah? i love that? any other magizoologists in this building that need some mentoring? hit me up!!!!

same goes for the quibbler, if your character somehow writes for the quibbler, hmu? i think xeno is still the editor but lbr the man is OLD

fellow trio era characters should hit me up so we can talk about the good old school days and CRIE

order members that are ?????????????????? at luna, that are a bit skeptical, etc etc?

fellow art buds

death eaters that want 2 eliminate her ig lets angst this up

idk luna is fairly easy to plot with so just hmu and we can figure something out!!!!

[davidmann95]

This week's comics? Specifically, new Tom King Batman/Green Lantern?

Hoo boy, this week was a hefty one. Tackling your requests at the top, and no spoilers this week:

The Green Lantern #2: It’s surprising how non-action-driven this has been for the first couple issues - it really is space cop stuff first and foremost, in this case an interrogation. I see what Morrison meant in interviews when he said people would take Hal’s voice as odd in this, and I hope he’ll follow though when he said the core of his take’ll be a little clearer soon, but even so I’m liking him well enough as the traditional straight-take superhero anchor to the 2000ADness of it all. The Oa spread on page 7 is absolutely jaw-dropping, and the guest villain of the issue explaining his name is the best thing in superhero comics this week, and possibly this year.

Batman #60: I’ll admit the last 5-6 issues or so haven’t been tremendously doing it for me, but it certainly looks like it’s about to pick back up. And good lord, Jorge Fornes had better be getting any assignments he pleases.

Justice League #13: Grisly at it gets, the best word I can think of for this issue is a romp. It’s total old-school superhero adventure and villainous monologuing, just minus the hero part of that. Honestly, I’m almost worried about these Legion of Doom one-shots’ role in terms of the integrity of the run as a whole *as a Justice League run*, because it’s this side that feels so much more vibrant and fleshed-out. Granted Snyder and Tynion get full ownership of the villains involved so there’s more room to play, but I almost feel like this team would rather just be doing a Legion of Doom book period, because this is where the whole thing sings, great as the regular League stuff in here always is too.

Adventures of the Super Sons #5: I rag on Tomasi, but he’s not a bad writer, he’s a writer with specialties. And Super Sons is hitting all of those specialties, and I love it.

Shazam! #1: I checked this VERY tentatively on a recommendation and from how great the premise sounded, and unbelievably, it’s good. Not the next big thing by any means, but great superhero stuff that takes a modern bent on the material but maintains the warmth and wonder that defines Marvel at his best. It reads for all the world like a writer doing a very deliberate course-correction from how horrifically Geoff Johns fucked up the character top to bottom…except it’s actually Geoff Johns, essentially pulling a 180 on his own reboot? Whatever, Johns somehow rules (though there’s one or two lines in the backup that feel like notable Johnsisms), Dale Eaglesham rules, Mayo Naito rules on the backup, and this book, on the whole, rules.

Archie Meets Batman ‘66 #5: Feel like it’s lost some steam, but on the whole it remains a delight regardless.

Border Town #4: Everyone should still be reading this.

DIE #1: Kieron Gillen is a writer whose craft I can always respect, but usually it isn’t until reread that I truly get a kick out of his work. Don’t know what the difference is here - Stephanie Hans, the premise, the tone, the small core cast - but this seems to be the one that’s gonna grab me right off the bat.

The Wicked + The Divine #40: On the other end of the Gillen spectrum, I’ve been lost here for awhile, so I appreciate this issue essentially reestablishing the fundamentals of what’s up as we head into the finale.

West Coast Avengers #5: Digging this! Quietly one of Marvel’s upper-tier titles at the moment. Still wanna grab Thompson’s Hawkeye run someday.

Marvel Knights #3: Fine. Exactly good enough for me to stick around for 3 more issues, knowing Cates is coming back for the end.

Shatterstar #3: I’m not convinced this shouldn’t have just been a one-shot about him as a landlord, but it’s still fun and it’s easily got me for the two remaining issues.

Killmonger #1: Top-tier shit by two creators I already loved but still underestimated. Hill has a remarkable talent for switching up his style with each project, and Ferreyra is going to be The Next Big Thing.

The Merry X-Men Holiday Special: Initially more miss than hit for me, but the ratio improves over the course of the book. However, while I was glad to see Hanukkah represented a fair deal, I can’t help but wish they called it the X-Men X-Mas Special.

Venom #9: Issa ittle-bittle Venom pupper! Otherwise solid but mainly left me more looking forward to the immediate future than getting much from what we had here (even if it laid the foundation here for what makes said future worth looking forward to).

The Best Defense: The Immortal Hulk #1: Rules. It’s Ewing Hulk (or really in this case Ewing Banner, the first story where he’s truly taken center stage other than kind of #2, making it in my opinion fairly indispensable to Immortal Hulk thematically if not plotwise), of course it rules.

The Best Defense: Namor #1: Also rules! I knew Zdarsky more than had the chops for heavier material, but this still came as a surprise that excites me for his Invaders, and Carlos Magno was a name I don’t believe I’ve seen before but quite liked. Kind of dislike though that each of these is a #1 when the recurring sequence and checklist in the back really does give this an implicit reading order; it’d definitely confuse readers who didn’t go in already knowing how this was gonna be structured.

The Immortal Hulk #10: Still the best comic on the stands, though there’s an ad placement at the end I really feel detracts from the big moment. And someone asked about the title, and I’m pretty sure it’s the mythic reference rather than an SCP one, even if I could imagine Ewing having seen that at some point.

Martian Manhunter #1: Absolutely brilliant on every level, more than carrying me through a startling premise I’m not at all geared to accept by default. Keep an eye on this one, I can’t imagine it not being one of DC’s most acclaimed books for the entirety of its run, and J’onn’s definitive story pretty much by default.

The Unexpected #7: Sharply picks up as it screams into the finale, but it’s still in every way a pale shadow of what it should have been.

Doomsday Clock #8: Well, it’s certainly still fascinating. At the 2/3rds mark Superman finally takes his place as the advertised co-lead, and while it’s probably the least technically ambitious issue so far (on that note, for a series as meticulous as this tries to be, it’s very noticeable and distracting that Superman switches between the plain red cape and having the yellow s-shield on the back), it’s probably the most thematically interesting and true to the described premise of the whole thing, showing Superman at his best trying and failing to function in a DCU that’s had its narrative underpinnings usurped by Watchmen. This is definitely on the better end of Johns’ treatment of him, with the whole issue anchored by a genuinely wonderful scene between him and the other major hero taking point for this specific installment,* and that’s what makes it work when everything goes to hell.

* It took me an embarrassingly long time to figure out why Johns picked the character he did here, even if ‘long time’ in this case means ‘actively thought about it for literally seconds’: (rot13.com) ur'f gur Ahpyrne Zna. Trqqvg? Nyfb, juvyr fbzr crbcyr unir ernq vg gung jnl, V qba'g guvax gur vqrn ng gur raq vf fhccbfrq gb or gung Sverfgbez vf Znaunggna, whfg gung gur raretl fcvxr orsber gur gryrcbegngvba ng gur raq orybatrq gb uvz engure guna Ebaavr. Nyfb, Puevfg V ubcr gurl qba'g ernyyl chg gur WFN onpx nf choyvp urebrf cerqngvat Fhcrezna naq gur erfg ol qrpnqrf. Jbefg ynetr-fpnyr ergpba QP rire chyyrq, yrffravat yvgrenyyl rirel punenpgre vaibyirq.

[heartslogos]

newfragile yellows [511]

Lady Ellana Lavellan of Morrin Keep, more recently of the Dales, is a very beautiful woman, who is both fair of face and temperament, quick with both wit and smile, and gracious in body and charm. Evelyn has no doubt in mind that she is well suited and lacks nothing in regards to the upbringing of a noble lady expected to marry for politics and practicality rather than romance and friendship.

That said.

“Is it to your liking, the Coast?” Evelyn asks, by which she means, and makes sure to clarify a beat later before Ellana can answer with a very reassuring and tailored answer that any lady of noble bearing would be able to think up, “Does the Iron Bull treat you well?”

Oh, Evelyn has no doubt that the Iron Bull has been nothing but a perfect…er. Well. Not gentleman. The Iron Bull is a man and is capable of being gentle, but he is never going to be a gentleman.

But the Iron Bull is a good man and he would not do anything untoward to anyone. Evelyn knows the Iron Bull and she’s certain that she knows him well enough that it makes him irritated with how well she knows the man behind his many masks whenever she uses that knowledge against his many tricks and plans and plots. It is, usually, for his own good. The Iron Bull is too good at scheming things to his own detriment.

Though, not even Evelyn could have foreseen the Iron Bull reluctantly volunteering himself for political marriage.

All of this to say, the Iron Bull would not abuse his newfound position of lord-husband to his lady-wife. But the Iron Bull is an acquired taste, and while he might not be pushing buttons or crossing boundaries with malicious intent, he is not the kind of person who everyone can befriend.

If Evelyn is going to steal away this woman’s future with a possible love-match or at least, match with someone more familiar, the absolute minimum she should do is make sure that the marriage she has found herself in is not driving her up the rain-slicked walls, or causing her any distress. More than the usual political marriage stress.

“You know,” Lady Ellana says, hands folded in her lap and looking quite serene and in place among the gray backdrop of the coast and the powerful fresh, almost threatening green of the grass, “I spend a vast majority of my time answering the question of does your husband treat you well, I find myself wondering if anyone has asked my lord husband if his lady wife treats him well. Do you think that is a question he gets asked?”

Evelyn had exchanged a few words with Lady Ellana prior to the marriage — not as many as she would have liked, of course — and heard a few more things about her from people who had spent a fractionally larger amount of time with her and with that one answer she’s lived up to every single rumor, whisper, word, and hope.

Evelyn grins, relaxing as she lets herself cautiously edge towards a more casual approach, “Oh don’t worry, Lady Ellana. That part is going to come right after this question. The Iron Bull is a loyal member of the Inquisition, and a close friend of mine. You can be assured that I am concerned for how he’s acclimatizing to his new domesticity.”

Lady Ellana holds out her hand and Evelyn takes it, surprised by the roughness of her palms and the strength with which she twists their arms into a soldier’s grasp.

“You can call me Ellana, Inquisitor,” Ellana says, grinning, “I am a Lady in name only, I assure you. A few decades training for the humble life of priesthood will strip away certain veneers, you see.”

“Thank the Maker,” Evelyn says, returning the grin with a wry twist of her own, “Because I grew up in the Circle and there isn’t much in the way of etiquette training going on there. Call me Evelyn, Ellana. And can I say? It’s nice to finally meet you.”

-

“So. How’s married life treating you?”

Bull cuts Dorian an annoyed look.

“I like to think we’re over the hostility,” Dorian continues, “At least. We pretend to be civil when around people we are actually civil with. So. I repeat, before Maxwell or Edric jumps in on this to force us to behave, how’s married life treating you?”

The Iron Bull lets out an annoyed exhale through his nose, “Fine. It’s the same as regular life. The three of you didn’t come all the way here to ask me what it’s like to be married, and I didn’t ride out all the way to the edge of the Storm Coast to get my ass soaked by cold rain and be asked pleasantries. Get to the shit.”

“No, really, that’s it,” Maxwell says before Dorian can reply. “We really are here to ask how things are going. You know. In case there was something you couldn’t say in a letter because it might be intercepted? Or it wouldn’t be good to have on record?”

“To rephrase it,” Edric says, “Do you think this thing is going to hold or is it going to fall apart?”

“Are you asking me if my marriage - my month long marriage - is in tatters?”

“Yes,” the three of them reply.

“Thanks for that vote of confidence,” Bull grumbles. “You couldn’t have asked me this at Morrin Keep? Where I didn’t have to ride out for two days and it’s comfortable?”

“Again,” Maxwell says, “Anything you want to say to us that you might not say where overzealous ears can reach?”

Bull gestures to the shack they’re in, “And this is the absolute pinnacle of security, right.”

“Don’t be glib, just tell us what we need to know,” Dorian snaps. “It wasn’t a pleasant trip for us, either.”

“It’s fine,” Bull replies. “It’s been one month. We’re still figuring each other out. We don’t hate each other. She seems nice enough. Sometimes she makes me laugh. She likes dogs. She’s working on landscaping the Keep. She’s sit at sewing anything more complicated than straight stitch. She likes to go riding when the weather’s good. Do you want a full dossier on trivia I’ve figured out about her?”

“Does she feel the same way about you?” Edric asks, “Before you get all snippy, I’m just checking to make sure that this is a two way thing and she’s not sending coded messages for an immediate removal and divorce back to the Dales.”

“Why, the Dales say something to the Boss?”

“No,” Dorian admits, “But who knows how long it takes for messages to travel.”

Bull rolls his eye.

“Just come visit us at the Keep if you’re so worried. Things are fine. We’re getting to know each other. I’m not reporting back shit because there’s nothing to report. Unless the Inquisition seriously wants me to send the diary entries about her or something. That would be weird as fuck, but sure, I guess I can do that.”

“Do not send the Inquisition diary entries about what you and your wife do,” Maxwell stresses. “There are so many reasons why you should not do that and I don’t need to tell you any of them.”

“Then tell the Boss to quit it with the constant worrying,” Bull replies. “No news is good news, just let it be for a bit, alright? I’ve got this.”

[xxbyimm]

The bet - A Thorin x OC series

For anyone who’s interested: here’s a link to my Masterlist OR if you love Enya, check out her story: Enya’s unexpected journey. 

Based on this imagine that I posted on Tumblr that everyone seemed to love. I decided that Thorin needed a strong OC for this series to work, so... Yes. I ended up with Enya. The characters did their own thing, so my first chapter turned out a little bit... different than I anticipated. I hope y’all like it anyway. xoxo

Phase I - The bet

Summary:  Our OC Enya lands in a fierce argument with her king, because she has seen him staring at another dam’s ass. She offers Thorin a challenge: to prove to her he does has, in fact, decent self-control, he has to refrain four weeks from physical contact. He thinks he can make it. Easily. He is a king. But who says the queen is gonna let him win this easily? Let the games begin…

Taglist: @symphony25 @oakenshieldsmizimel, @nelswp, @bellastellaluna, @imagines-for-multiple-fandoms, @leah-halliwell92, @sassytyphoondetective, @jotink78, @armitageadoration, @patanghill17, @sweeticedtea, @evyiione, @fergrigori, @thegreyberet, @maioneill, @mycabin13-blog, @deepestfirefun - Tumblr doesn’t want to tag some of you properly, I’m sorry!!! If you wish to be on this list, please let me know.

Warning: Enya’s swearing. Contains smut. 

All men were the fucking same.

No exceptions. Her mother had told her that once, many years before. Enya remembered the night vividly. There had been a party, hosted by a guy from her math-class she really, really liked. She had spent all day perfecting her look: trying to find the right outfit, adding just another layer of mascara… She had been all fired up; ready to receive that first kiss. Alas it turned out to be a disaster; the object of her affection broke her heart by kissing her best friend. Enya went straight home and sat on the patio for hours as she tried to remember what she had done wrong to deserve something like this. The tears that kept falling down her cheeks ruined her makeup and turned her into a sad panda. It didn’t matter, her life had ended anyway. Looking back, she had to conclude that back then, she had already been quite the drama queen. At some point her mom joined her and pulled her daughter into a tight hug. At first Enya didn’t want to talk to her mother and tried to shove her away as any teenager would do. The two of them fought all the time (and would spend a great deal of their time quarrelling after that day anyway), and Ailva seemed the last person on earth capable of comforting her. But at that moment, Ailva just held her daughter and understood the agonizing feeling of an heartbreak.

‘All men are the same, En.’ She confided. ‘They can’t help it, it’s the weakness in their flesh.’ ‘But we were meant to be!’ Enya had cried out, too hurt to see the boy in question clearly wasn’t. A soft smile appeared on Ailva’s face, only too familiar with puppy love. ‘You’ll find your soulmate, honey. Don’t you worry. And when you do, you’ll know.’ ‘How?’ Enya had sniffed. This wasn’t helping her at all! A faint promise of meeting someone in the future who she didn’t even know yet, how was that supposed to cheer her up? ‘You just know.’ Her mother replied. ‘Trust me.’

Looking back, Enya wished she should have been wise and listened to the warning. But, naive as she was, she didn’t. She broke her heart many times after that night, always being left with the echo of her mother’s promise. She often wondered if she already met her soulmate, and why he hadn't found her yet. Ha, she bet the poor bastard probably took a wrong turn somewhere and was lost, too stubborn to ask for directions.

Turned out that was more true than she ever could imagine. The love of her life often lost his way, but was too proud to admit it. Even to her. A smile crossed her face. Her mother had been right after all. The day she met Thorin… It had been fireworks from the start. The intensity in which she wanted him, the fact that they couldn’t stay away from each other... They were bound to each other, meant to be. Designed by Mahal himself to match. Although their journey to Erebor hadn’t been easy and adjusting to their new roles as king and queen proved to be more of a challenge than both of them had expected, they had each other. She knew she could count on him. She knew the passion never died, because behind closed doors they were still as insatiable as in the beginning of their relationship. They were rock solid.

Or so she thought.

‘All men are the same, En.’ She repeated to herself. She huffed. Just mankind? For a long time she believed that dwarves were different, but right now she wasn’t so sure anymore. All males, every race included, were bastards. She’d never thought that Thorin would be the same, because he was no ordinary male. He was a dwarf lord, for god’s sake. But that obviously didn’t protect him from falling for the oldest trick in the book.

The other woman.

Enya Blueheart heaved a sigh and stood up from the huge boulder she had been sitting on for the last few hours. Since she lived in Thorin’s renewed kingdom, this rocky area on the quiet side of the mountain had been her refuge. She came here to practice her powers and to meditate- a vain attempt to keep herself sane. The mountain slope provided enough cover from prying eyes, allowing her to unleash her rage fully. On top of all that, from this point it only was a twenty minutes’ walk to Dale. She liked to come in Dale. After the BOTFA she had become good friends with Bard, and she couldn’t be more proud of him. The way he handled his position as lord of the city was admirable, and he had managed to transform the town into a thriving center again. The relationship between Erebor and Dale was, thanks to Enya, finally improving. Thorin wasn’t too happy about the bond between his wife and the bowman, but she simply told him to get over it and he did. For some time, things seemed to be right.

Enya slowly began climbing the path towards Erebor again. She had been outside all day, first helping out Bard with his letter to king Thranduil, and after that she spent the remaining afternoon on her hidden spot. The sky was already darkening, but she dreaded to go home. Not now, not when… She clenched her jaw, scolding herself for growing into a weak version of herself. Old Enya would have scorched any female that came near her king; after that she’d probably throw the ashes off the mountain and get away with the murder. But old Enya didn’t know the court, nor the powerful nobles that resided there. This new version of her, the more polished queen, had to change her tactics. She had to proceed with caution, and acting like pre-queen Enya would only lead to disaster. She groaned, wishing she’d paid more attention to Balin. That old goat (as she lovingly called him) knew his way around highborn dwarves, taking advantage of his sweet demeanor and lying in their faces without batting an eye. She still didn’t understand how he did that, and she made a mental note to ask him one day. She passed the soldiers that guarded the entrance of the mighty dwarven kingdom and they bowed before her. Enya smiled at them, resisting the urge to decline her head. She understood why social hierarchy was so important, but on days like this she wanted to disappear behind the walls and be no one. There was no hallway she could cross without having to greet someone. Talking about tiresome. She rolled her eyes.

‘My queen.’ A soft feminine voice spoke behind her. Enya cringed and quickly turned around, ready to put on her haughty face when she saw her lady-in-waiting, Nin, smiling up at her. Her red locks were shining in the light of the torches, her pretty bluish-grey eyes sparkling with humor. Enya was grateful the title of lady-in-waiting had been given to Nin, because it meant she could keep her best friend close. And Nin was a gift from heaven. ‘God damnit, Nin!’ she exclaimed. ‘You scared me.’ ‘What are you wearing?’ Nin sniggered. ‘And where have you been? Thorin tried to find you all day, and he was not… pleased when I told him even I didn’t know where you was.’ Enya shot her friend a glance. ‘I’m your queen, you should bow before me and stop asking difficult questions.’ Nin grinned. ‘Oh, bollocks. You hate such formalities, and I don’t see anyone around here.’ She linked her arm with Enya’s and they strolled through the corridor towards the royal quarters. ‘If I may speak so freely…’ she continued and elegantly dodged Enya’s hand that tried to slap her. ‘You look stunning in those breeches, En. They hug you in all the right places…’ Enya giggled. ‘I think that’s exactly why Thorin insists me wearing a dress in court.’ Nin snorted. ‘Those modest dresses won’t make a difference. Even the noblest dwarves gawk at your pretty physique when you enter a room.’ ‘Oh, please.. tell him that!’ Enya begged. ‘Thorin is unbelievably stubborn about it.’ ‘Talking about that handsome subject…’ Nin began while they turned a corner. ‘Does the fact that you were missing all day having anything to do with a problem that starts with an E and ends with a N?’ ‘Don’t say it.’ Enya grumbled while clenching her fists. ‘I don’t wanna hear it. I. Will. Scorch. The. bitch.’ ‘I’m not stopping you.’ Her best friend confided. ‘She’s a brat and she deserves it for acting like that around Thorin.’

It had only been a few weeks since Enya sensed there was something wrong. A new dwarven family had shown up at court and Thorin allowed them to stay. They already blended in with the other nobles, but Enya didn’t like the way they seemed to change the atmosphere. The dams began to gossip, spreading ugly tales about others wherein no one was spared. To makes matters worse, she felt the distrust against mankind grow with the day. Which of course was completely unfair and unnecessary; Enya did her best to counter these accusations. But so far, it hadn’t been enough. Enya suspected the new noble family of conveying rumors, and especially a young dwarrowdam, called Elmilynn. She caught the filthy girl telling lies one time and kept an wary eye on her since then.

That’s when she noticed other things. She watched that bitch ogling HER husband a little bit too much during important gatherings. Or the dam bended a bit too close towards him when she had the delight of speaking directly with him. She laughed TOO loud at his jokes. That Elmilynn was trying way too hard and Thorin didn’t see it. He was treating her kindly, and Enya even caught him staring at her ass! Oh, she hated it. For all she could tell, he felt flattered and desired by the wench.

FLATTERED. DESIRED?

Motherfucking hell, she was going to kill him. He had no right to like, or watch any other female dwarf in that mountain but his queen. Oh, she could see right through that filthy little smug-faced girl! The little brat had decided to seduce the king, to persuade him in ditching his current queen. No doubt her family was behind her, some old-fashioned fools that liked to see all the old rules restored. Hatred against elves, men. Stricter rules for the women. They wanted back to that life of endless prosperity and power, the life that provoked a dragon to take their home. Enya scoffed. This queen wasn’t going down without a fight. She battled too viciously for all these changes, she loved her king too much to let this happen. She couldn’t fight with her fire this time, but she was ready to take another approach and roast Elmilynn and her whole family on a spit. She could wait, she was capable of keeping her head cool and-

‘GET BACK!’ The air was pushed out of Enya’s lungs when Nin suddenly pulled her back behind a statue. ‘What?!’ she grumbled. ‘Is master Runebelt in sight?’ Nin shook her head and motioned towards the other side of the corridor. Thank god, no master Runebelt. Enya liked the librarian, but the topics he redeemed interesting were enough to put her into sleep on the spot. She frowned and peered in the pointed direction.

Oh for fuck’s sake.

She pricked up her ears, trying to catch the conversation. ‘My king, what a coincidence I ran into you!’ Elmilynn chirped. ‘Yes, it is!’ Thorin replied. ‘I was about to retire to my chambers, but now while you’re here… I was thinking about what you said the other day-’ ‘You’ve got to be joking!’ Enya hissed while turning away. ‘I’m gonna KILL him, both of them! She just doesn’t stop! What did I miss, Nin? Are they involved?’ ‘No, my guess is that he’s being stupid and probably thinks she’s just friendly.’ Her friend tried. ‘Thorin cares too much about you to do this.’ ‘Does he?’ Enya questioned, while gesturing at the pair. ‘I don’t know anymore.’ ‘No, he’s just polite and-’ Nin began, but her face dropped when Enya slipped from their hiding place and walked into the hallway. ‘En, come back! You can’t…’ ‘Watch me.’ Enya groaned. ‘Talk to you later.’

Enya leaned casually against the wall and watched them nearing her, a single flame rising from her palm betraying how furious she actually was. Normally she would have teared them apart, but this situation needed tact. Everyone knew she was by no means an expert at that, but she could give it a try. ‘My queen.’ Thorin said when he noticed her, while giving her the I-have-been-looking-for-you-all-day-where-have-you-been-look. ‘Queen Enya.’ Elmilynn chirruped. ‘It’s so nice to see you again!’

‘Nice? Drop dead bitch.’ Enya’s mind scoffed.

‘Ah, my king. There you are.’ She said, ignoring her female subject. ‘Where have you been?’ Thorin inquired while eyeing her up and down. His pupils were slightly dilated, an clear sign of the fact that her appearance was distracting him. Ah, so far for avoiding the so-called lustful glances of his kin… Had she just found out the real reason why she couldn’t wear revealing clothing anymore? ‘Out.’ Enya replied matter-of-factly while studying her polished fingernails. She loved the bright red color on them. ‘I had things to do.’ Elmilynn shuffled awkwardly on her feet. Enya hoped she felt like a unwanted stranger, someone who didn’t belong here and she directed her gaze towards the young dam. ‘Oh, hi Elmilynn.’ She hummed, faking a smile. ‘I didn’t see you there… You have to forgive me, I had a long and tiresome day.’ ‘It’s nothing, my lady.’ ‘You don’t mind me taking back my husband, don’t you?’ Enya demanded in her queenly voice. ‘I was told he needs me.’ Elmilynn swallowed and bowed her head, but there was an indocile glare in her eyes. ‘Of course, my queen.’ She replied while turning away. ‘Forgive me for intruding, my king.’ ‘It was nothing…’ Thorin told the young dam. ‘We’ll continue our conversation tomorrow.’

‘Nothing? Tomorrow??’ Enya’s mind scolded. ‘You’re in big trouble, Oakenshield!’

‘Oh honey, wait a minute…’ Enya and walked up to the young surprised dam. She faced her directly, her fierce blue eyes boring into grey ones. ‘Nothing is worth my rage, trust me.’ She breathed. ‘Forget it.’ Elmilynn tilted her head, innocence displayed on her face. ‘I don’t what you’re talking about, my queen.’ ‘Oh, I think you do.’ Enya purred. ‘Head my warning. If you don’t back off right away, I’ll make sure you’ll suffer a great deal more than Smaug did. His death will seem merciful compared to your fate.’ Elmilynn scoffed. ‘We’ll see about that... We’ll see…’ Then she curtseyed shortly and disappeared behind the corner.

The door of their bedroom shut with a loud clank. ‘You are cruel.’ Thorin exclaimed. ‘Did you really think it was necessary to threaten that poor girl? She doesn’t deserve to be scolded by you like that!’ ‘Poor?’ Enya shot back. ‘You’re lucky I didn’t kill her on that very spot! I cannot stand there watch you FLIRT with that ignorant, little-’ She couldn’t even finish her sentence and let out an frustrated growl instead while throwing her hands in the air. ‘I don’t flirt with anyone but you.’ Thorin stated. ‘I don’t see what Elmilynn ever did to you for you to hate her so much.’ ‘Don’t you ever say that name.’ Enya hissed and shot him an ominous glare. She just couldn’t bear it, the name of that filthy dam rolling of his tongue like it was sacred. The bitch didn’t deserve something like that.

‘Wait, are you jealous of her?’ Thorin husked, his lips curving into a smile. ‘Is that what this is about?’ ‘As if.’ Enya huffed. ‘I’m a queen. The mere suggestion that I would feel threatened by that obnoxious… thing is repulsive.’ Thorin eyed her suspiciously and she knew he wasn’t buying it. Well, she didn’t even believe herself. The fact that she switched to her queenly voice, as Thorin liked to call it, said enough. ‘It’s a good thing your role as queen helps you to keep everything separated…’ Thorin mused. ‘It would be a shame if your emotions clouded your… judgement.’ ‘Oh, I hate you.’ Enya muttered angrily. ‘You do? I know I’ve been thinking about you all day...’ Thorin purred as his hands pulled her against him. His fingers traveled to her buttocks, kneading the soft flesh. ‘I got word you were looking for me.’ Enya told him, while her body writhed against him. His hands were distracting her from her fury and flared up a deep desire instead. ‘Yes, I was.’ Thorin replied, his lips dangerously close to hers. ‘Where have you been?’ ‘Bard’s.’ Enya whispered in his ear. If he could play the game, so could she. She knew she could make him jealous, if she pushed the right buttons… But Thorin wasn’t taking the bait. Instead he kissed her cheek, the rough facial hair scraping her skin. ‘So he had the pleasure to watch your cute ass move around him all day, while I got…’ he rumbled. ‘Nobles and boredom.’ His hands fumbled on her breeches. ‘And eager dwarrowdams.’ Enya huffed. ‘They all want you.’ ‘But why would I want those when I’ve got a beautiful queen by my side?’ Thorin murmured, his lips brushing over hers. ‘That doesn’t make sense, Blueheart.’ ‘Change of scenery.’ Enya opted. She licked her lips in anticipation when Thorin bent forward. ‘The thrill of…’ she stuttered. ‘Something new.’ ‘I find the thrill of having you a lot more satisfactorily…’ he breathed in her ear. ‘I don’t believe you.’ ‘Oh, mahal!’ Thorin growled. ‘You breathtaking, stubborn shrew!’

He surged forward and pulled her into a bruising kiss, his tongue intertwining with hers. Enya moaned into his mouth, passion swirling through her body and making her mad with desire. Her hands traveled down, struggling with the laces of his breeches. She slipped one hand inside, stroking him along his length. She wanted him, she needed him to show her how much he cared. Thorin groaned in response, his hips buckling forward. He hoisted her up and they crashed against his writing desk. ‘You can’t-’ she began and bit her lip when he wiped the desk clean with one swing of his arm. Inkpots and other writing materials clattered on the floor, the sound of it ringing in her ears. If no one had heard them quarrelling, they were aware of the situation now.

‘Apparently I can.’ He barked. ‘The thrill of something new…’ Before she could move, he pushed her down on the table and tore her pants from her body. The fabric made a protesting ripping sound as it came off and Thorin tossed it carelessly on the floor. ‘Those were expensive!’ she snarled as she shot up. ‘Who do you think you are, Oakenshield?’ Thorin smirked. ‘I’m a king. I’m sure I can persuade the tailor to make a new pair for you.’ ‘Arrogant asshole!’ She bickered. ‘It’s not like you allow me to WEAR THEM!’ Thorin clenched his jaw, his hands moving fast as he loosened his breeches some more, just enough to free his thick shaft from its confinement. Enya had no patience, she wanted him now! She wriggled in an attempt to free herself from her current position, but his strong hands pushed her down once more. A moan escaped from her lips when one of his fingers slipped into her heated core. Thorin groaned as her inner walls twitched around him. ‘Are you going to torture me?’ she quipped, tilting her head lightly. ‘No!’ Thorin snapped and positioned himself before her. Enya couldn’t help but admire his broad chest, the refined muscles on his abdomen, the thick dark trail of hair that grew towards his groin… He was a sight to behold. He managed to take her breath away, every single time. She didn’t even notice his fingers leaving her, but she did cry out as his entire length suddenly entered her in one go. Thorin looked down on her, his gaze burning through hers. His mouth was slightly open, his breathing somewhat unsteady. Enya’s cheeks flushed and a moan escaped her mouth as he started to pick up the pace, his rhythm hard and unforgiving. She wasn’t going to last long and he knew it.

Bastard.

‘You men are all the same!’ she bickered. It was hard to form words or to think while he took her like this, but she really didn’t want him to win this fight by simply fucking her senseless. ‘Are you really going to pick a fight about this?’ Thorin hissed, his hips slamming into hers. ‘Yes.’ She blurted out, biting her lip. Oh, he knew exactly how to drive her insane. She swallowed hard. ‘Damn right.. I am.’ ‘No.’ he rasped, closing his eyes while pleasure took hold of him. ‘Enya… don’t… just…’ ‘I’ve caught you staring at her ass NUMEROUS TIMES!’ Enya snapped, dragging her nails into his chest. ‘It’s HUMILIATING!’ ‘MAHAL, ENYA!’ he shouted. ‘STOP IT!’ ‘NEVER!’ she countered, but forgot what she wanted to say when he bit her collarbone. She threw her head back against the tabletop. Thorin was hovering over her, the heavy scent of his tobacco alluring her senses. He was everything she ever wanted, everything she ever desired. Her breath hitched, her body begging for its release. A fire pooled in her abdomen, flaring up with each stroke against the spot that made her see stars. Her body started to shiver when Thorin’s thumb grazed her clit. ‘Prove it.’ She moaned into his ear. ‘Oh god Thorin, prove it to me!’ ‘Yes!’ Thorin gasped. ‘Anything.’

Middle earth stopped spinning. The ground dissolved and waves of pleasure surged through her, sending her over the edge. Her body exploded, tuning out all senses, expect for the face of her one. Their eyes locked and Thorin growled desperately as her inner walls squeezed around him tightly, forcing him to follow her. ‘Enya!’ he murmured as his release claimed him, spilling his seed deep inside of her. He slumped against her and she listened as their ragged breathing slowed down. She caressed his long dark manes, her fingers traveling over the familiar patterns of his braids. Thorin heaved a sigh and kissed her gently. ‘I propose a bet, lasting four weeks.’ She breathed. ‘You have to last four weeks without any physical contact.’ ‘Any physical contact?’ Thorin asked, placing soft kisses in her neck. ‘Even you?’ ‘Yes. You can’t touch anyone, unless you have to during social occasions.’ Enya murmured. ‘And you can’t be near me either.’ ‘You think I won’t make it.’ Thorin said. ‘I don’t think your self-control is that strong.’ Enya dared. ‘I mean, all men are the same after all and it’s just a matter of time before their eyes start to wonder. Guys just can’t help yourselves, can they?’ Thorin narrowed his eyes. ‘I take the bet, if only to show you that weak flesh doesn’t exist in the line of Durin.’ ‘Think you can handle it?’ Enya inquired. ‘I know I will…’ Thorin rumbled. ‘I just wonder how you will cope, my queen. May I remind you that you’re as insatiable as I am?’ ‘I’ll be fine.’ Enya denied. ‘Then you don’t mind an additional rule…’ Thorin smirked and got up. ‘Surprise me.’ She purred, raising her legs and putting them on his shoulders. Thorin inhaled sharply, his blue eyes watching her intently. ‘You’re as tempting as ever, my queen.’ ‘Is that a problem?’ Enya giggled while tilting her head slightly. ‘It will be, for a few weeks.’ Thorin husked while leaving feather-light kisses on her feet. ‘Which brings me to our additional rule…’ A devious smile appeared on his lips. ‘Either of us are prohibited from pleasuring ourselves without the other being present.’

Gah! Frustrating dwarven king! He had just smashed her secret escape, her plan to survive those 28 days… It meant she had to suffer with him.

‘That surely sounds interesting.’ She replied, unwilling to admit that he cornered her. ‘When will the game begin?’ ‘Hmm…’ Thorin mused. ‘Let’s say midnight.’ Enya cocked a brow. ‘That’s at least five hours from now!’ ‘Exactly.’ He agreed. ‘It will give me plenty of time to ensure we’ll end up both satisfied for at least a few days.’ ‘A few days?’ she teased. ‘Is that even possible?’ ‘Well..’ Thorin told her while lifting her up in his arms again. ‘We can try…’

Let the games begin…