#EDIT I ENDED UP CUTTING THE SCENE AFTER ALL THAT LMAO

[johnslittlespoon]

writing day going well

[hazelnut-u-out]

Do you think about the whole Rick Prime thing? Did it kinda feel anticlimactic???

Yeeahhhhhh, but... I think that's the point!

At first, I was a little bit disappointed with how they handled the arc. I really thought Prime was going to be the Big Bad! Having the whole climax of C-137's arc with Prime as a mid-season episode felt oddly... dismissive? It was like it wasn't even a major event.

After sitting on this for a bit, I think I actually love how they've handled it. I think this is the first time I've really seen the show take something that perfectly fills a 'Television Run' format (i.e. big events at the ends of the seasons for cliffhangers, and so on) and subvert those expectations into something more like 'Real Life.' In my opinion, a lot of the show is shown as how characters involved view the events, especially in terms of tonality. That's why so much of the show fits these media formulas-- Rick views his life as a show.

I often refer to the majority of the show as 'Rick's Director's Cut' because we get events skewed from his warped perception of his own actions. (You can even think of 'Morty's Mindblowers' as Rick literally editing footage into a better story.) Of course, we see why he's sympathetic. As the viewer, we understand why he's doing what he's doing, even if we don't agree with it. He views himself as the 'sitcom dad'-- comically fucked up and abusive, but secretly caring. Rick believes that he's got just enough heart for his actions to be excusable, forgetting that the people he hides his intentions from aren't getting the 'full picture' like the viewer is. From Morty's perspective, Rick does these things for no reason-- unless you count not liking, caring about, or valuing Morty. Of course, we know that's not the case, but Morty doesn't. His family doesn't.

The Prime arc is fascinating to me because of the contrast between how Rick viewed it versus how it happened from the perspective of the viewer. Rick went into the Prime arc thinking it would be a massive, badass epic where the underdog comes out on top and the audience is satisfied with the conclusion. As the audience, this is probably the first time we haven't really been able to click with that, you know? It was unsatisfying, even for Rick, and now he's sort of saddled with, 'Oh, shit. This is real life. What comes next?'

Sure, they're little guys on our television screens. To them, though... that's real life. Real life is messy. Real life is unsatisfying. Real life is disappointing, the editing is sloppy, arcs aren't linear, and dysfunction and substance abuse aren't silly character traits.

The whole point is: What happens now?

In real life, what happens after your abusive parent passes away or you finally get revenge on the person who tore your life apart? In real life, what happens after you beat the shit out of the guy who assaulted you? Or after your dad apologizes for walking out on you?

There's actually a Malcolm in the Middle scene reminiscent of this concept. Francis was blamed by Lois from the time he was born for ruining their relationship. Throughout the entire series, his arcs deal with their broken relationship. When she finally apologizes, the pinnacle of his hopes and dreams-- the only thing keeping him alive, it doesn't help. It doesn't fix the years of psychological abuse he suffered, or the fact that he's as broken as he is because of her failure as a parent.

Another great example is in Adventure Time, when Finn thinks he's ripped Martin's arm off for causing him to lose his own. The revenge doesn't help. (Sorry, not digging for a link to the scene lmao.)

Those things aren't satisfying on their own. The fantasies and daydreams we barter through aren't feasible cures. That's real life. What happens afterward is what you do next. That can be a tough pill to swallow. There's no quick 'fix-all' for everything that's fucked you up. What helps? Hard work. Dedication. Time. Therapy. Grief. Acceptance.

Rick never really worked through the grieving process, you know?

There was Denial and Anger:

And where he got stuck... Bargaining:

After Prime's death? Depression:

Four decades later, we're finally on the cusp of Acceptance.

That's what that look into the hole was. That's what putting up Morty's picture was. That's what choosing to walk away was.

Acceptance.

In conclusion of my long-winded rant, I liked the Prime arc. Fits nicely into the season after the finality of 'Fear No Mort.'

Well done, writers.

Thanks for asking! <3

[cyndraws]

Kaishin secret santa 2023

This is a Kaishin roleswap au for @blueamphibians! I hope you enjoy this art + my ramblings on the au underneath. Because of course, I couldn't just leave it as one piece of art haha (ehem please buckle in for preparation)

Many thanks to @dcmkkaishinevents / Mack for hosting this event, it was super fun participating and interacting with the community <3 <3 As a side note, I would absolutely recommend it to others who are considering signing up next year. Everyone is very friendly!

(Hey Blue, I had more art planned but unfortunately many things came up. But I hope you enjoy this anyways! I might draw some more for you later ^-^ Thanks so much for this prompt <3 <3)

Edit: I have decided that now you will receive a completed arts + ramblings + some WIPs behind the scene hahahaha https://www.tumblr.com/cyndraws/737208478471487488/kaishin-secret-santa-2023-extras-basically-wips?source=share

AU ramblings under the cut (ngl it's a lot):

Random details and notes that don't really fit anywhere. Mostly about the fanart:

Kaito is 1 year older than Shin and is taller than him

This scene is set over the Haido City hotel. In the distance you can see Shiriyomi Trust Hotel (can't full recognise it behind Kaito but I assure you I drew it lol), Tokyo tower (easy to spot) and Roppongi Hills Mori Tower (Just behind Shin on the right, the one with the lights in a --u-- shape) Main reference: https://www.detectiveconanworld.com/wiki/Haido_City_Hotel

I was also screaming at the Kaishin pic in ED70 throughout this LMAO.

Kaito breaks through Shinichi's mysterious KID persona in this drawing and Shinichi shyly reveals his face behind the mask. Kaito then produces a blue flower, claiming it matches Shinichi's beautiful eyes (he's also the one who bred it)

Kaito has extra pockets sewn into his uniform to carry more tricks. This wasn't really necessary in canon, but here, Kaito has to be prepared to investigate at any moment.

Lmao help me render hair *stares at Kaito's* Cool effect but not quite right. I need to go experiment later.

Kaito/Shin getting shrunk (aka Conan situation) never happens in this au. But Haibara and the other victims are still around. Haibara still lives at the professor's.

~

Background:

Yusaku was much more entangled and involved with Toichi and his fight with the Black Org. Side note but in this au, Snake is from a division of the Black Org

As a result, they both end up being killed during the fateful accident. Yes, both Shinichi and Kaito are there for it. They were going to be introduced to each other on that day, but well,,, we can see the way it ended.

It wasn't well known that the Kuroba and Kudo family were close at all. Extra vigilance was taken after the funerals to ensure their safety. Their families parted ways for the better or worse after thsi event.

Yusaku's and Toichi's friendship/rivalry included collaborating for some heists, having a second secret base in the Kudo mansion, and Yusaku donning the Night Baron costume... even if he was just hidden in a car and sending information to Toichi via an earpiece lol.

After their husbands' deaths, Yukiko and Chikage meet up occasionally and travel together in secret.

~

Shinichi:

Shinichi never became a famous detective. The years after Yusaku died in the tragic accident, Yukiko and him tried their best to move on with varying success. Shinichi's dream to become a famous detective never came to fruition.

This was because for various reasons including not having Yusaku's guiding hand to develop Shin's detective skills, was only being taken to crime scenes for a year, and of course the trauma.

After avoiding detective work as much as he could (well considering that he's still a corpse magnet), Shinichi finally starts to dig through his memories. From then, he uncovered a strange inconsistency with the logic of his father's death and starts to obsess over the idea that it was a murder.

Shin painstakingly and slowly investigates in the shadows with his *ehem* admittedly rusty detective skills and chases after the very little crumbs left by the organisation. What he uncovers is that the accident wasn't one at all, but premeditated murder by an encompassing third party.

Shinichi finally finds a lead to,,, Jii Konosuke. This takes quite a few years, and Shinichi is 15 when he confronts Jii.

Jii reveals everything after Shinichi's deduction and also mistaking him for Kaito. And such Shinichi is brought into the fold. Shinichi also makes up his mind to take on the KID mantle, greatly sympathising with the fellow teen whose father was also involved.

The years after Shinichi uncovers the truth, he learns many skills such as disguise, acting and magic from Jii and Chikage. However, his magic skills will never be on par with Kaito's.

Shinichi in this au has more acting and disguise skills from living with his mother. She passed this skills onto him, and they bonded over it to recover from their grief.

When Shinichi is 17, he officially takes on the role of KID. Chikage permanently locked the KID cave in the Kuroba house, and the KID cave settled in its new home in the Kudo mansion. Inside the second base previously used by Toichi and Yusaku.

Shinichi as KID:

Well, he's just as dramatic as Kaito in canon, but it's a different kind of dramatic. Shin is more of a mysterious and cryptic phantom thief and wears a menacing Night Baron mask. He overall speaks less, and when he does, he says a lot of dramatic lines. Like in theatre almost, with plenty of double meanings.

He takes on a lot of aspects from the Phantom Lady and Jii's interpretation of KID.

And also, I was inspired by the Black Knight, Shiragami in canon, and AngelicSentinel's fantastic fic, Heart of Eternity. I guess you could describe it as more theatrely, cool and princely. He's still very athletic (laughing at Shinichi being Tarzan as Shiragami)

Unlike Kaito, Shin's notices often involve cryptic riddles. It satisfies Shinichi's puzzle loving side and adds to his mysterious reputation.

It's funny to me how Akako's 'Demon of Light' moniker is still accurate haha

Shinichi investigates a little in the shadows and is overall a touch more hot-headed than Kaito KID

He uses a lot more gadgets to cover for his lesser magic skills. He's still learning though! A lot of them are references to Conan's and KID's in canon. Between Jii and Agasa, he gets a lot of them haha. This includes:

Mask/monocle -> voice changer, mask to cover for poker face, zoom and night vision, tracker, microphone and radio, gas mask.

Transmitter/microphone -> button stickers, bugs in general, cufflinks. In some cases, a camera but it must be asked for first. Shin uses these to cover for Kaito's doves in canon.

Wristwatch -> Clock of course for his heist times, tranquilliser, emergency flashbomb (KID has one in canon too)

Shoes -> jet powered rollerskates (equivalent to skateboard). Of course, Shin still kicks things but it looks more to take down the occasional criminal, trigger emergency traps, and more. He doesn't kick often because it doesn't really suit the image of KID + it's a unique skill to have.

+ other usual KID gadgets -> smoke, flash, sleeping bombs, grapple gun, hang glider, etc.

~

Kaito:

He's still an aspiring magician

Since there's a rising amount of cases in Beika, Kaito gets recommended by Nakamori because of his magic skills. The idea is that his knowledge of magic tricks will help uncover the criminals' tricks... Well this includes basically all cases lol. It works though! And the news of Meitantei Kaito starts to spread.

Kaito falls in love with the dramatics and triumphs of figuring out a criminal's trick. He starts to get called into Beika every time a case is discovered. One different to Shin is that Kai gets called to the cases instead of the cases coming to him.

His detective persona is like KID's in canon - flirty, dramatic, confident, charming, a bit of a pervert, and a classic showman's personality. Aoko is sick of it hahaha.

Kai's deduction show is very dramatic. He uses flashy magic tricks to reveal evidence and tricks, and uses his magic to take down criminals.

This includes his acrobatics, trusty card gun and traps he set beforehand. I like to headcanon that Kaito invented his cardgun first before integrating into KID. Kaito's cardgun includes the normal sharp cards (Kaito uses it to pin down criminals with their clothes, cut ropes, etc), tranquilliser laced cards, smoke and flash bombs. And also sleeping bombs but he uses it vary sparingly because even that toes the law a little too much... Megure is exasperated but the criminals are taken down quickly without much harm so he lets it slide

Kaito also follows in the spirit of dubious investigation. He changes his voice, uses his doves to spy on others, uses disguises (very very rarely), and is noisy overall.

Kaito and Hakuba:

Has a detective rivalry with Hakuba.

Hakuba still thinks, even in this au, that Kaito is KID. After all, Shin's profile is very similar to Kaito's. Kaito vehemently denies it but acts like a KID fan around Hakuba to annoy him. He isn't really though, citing KID's magic to be third rate, but he is still intrigued.

Hakuba offhandedly slips in wording and insinuations to Kaito's huge annoyance. You can imagine them bickering at a crime scene while Megure is just Too Used to this.

Much later on, when Kaito learns Shinichi's identity, Kaito tells Shinichi's about Hakuba's warnings. So Kaito is kinda a messenger between the two. Despite Hakuba being annoying, Kaito knows he can trust him.

~ Other character interactions:

Shinichi and Kaito:

Shinichi is still a corpse magnet. So he encounters a case, calls the police, and escapes as fast as he can after giving a witness statement. This is partly to avoid the awkwardness of meeting Megure and the police officers (he hasn't met them since his father died), as well as his new night job.

This results in the most frustrating yet amusing situation where Shin and Kaito miss meeting each other for quite a few years. Shinichi is busy hurrying off while Kaito is called to the scene and busy listening to the details.

Quick sketch I may/may not fully finish in the future:

Description: Set in suburban Beika. Shinichi is at the foreground, looking at his watch and worrying about meeting Jii on time. Meanwhile, next to a police car, Megure merrily discusses case details to Kaito. Kaito is glancing over to Shinichi in curiosity while keeping an ear open. He has his hands in his pockets. Behind Megure, the scene has police tape barring entrance.

~

Kaito thinks KID is a third rate magician but can appreciate the dramatics and mysteriousness. He is Intrigued. This leads to a meeting later on. Kaito uses his connection to Nakamori.

Shinichi is of course startled by Kaito's namedrop.

... Sorry no more details/plan about their meeting. It's definitely a dramatic face off though.

Regarding Shinichi's identity reveal, I was playing around with the idea that Snake is there, threatening the two at gunpoint and sneering over the '"lovely family reunion between father and son". It would definitely spur Kaito to grill Shin for more details

~

Shinichi and Hattori:

Hattori hears about the "Meitantei of the East" and goes off to meet him and challenge him to a deduction battle. He doesn't know how to contact him, so he goes with the strat of wandering around Beika until he runs into a case. He figured that with the high rate of cases being reported, he's eventually run into Kuroba ,,, yeah hahahaha Thats his entire plan

Luckily for Hattori, his detective luck exponentially multiplies with Shin's and a scream runs out. As Shinichi is reporting the crime and tried to head off, Hattori slings an arm around his shoulders to stop him from sneaking off.

Hattori loudly greets him as Kuroba despite Shinichi's insistence that "No, I am NOT Kuroba, please get your arm off me". Insert much scepticism from Hattori.

Even after they part ways, this isn't the last they see of each other. Hattori keeps wandering around Beika while running into Shinichi. They eventually become friends huhu.

Shinichi and the Detective Boys:

The Detective Boys admire Kaito a lot. Obviously they've watched the news reports on TV. So when they see him at the park playing soccer, they glomp him HAHAH Poor Shinichi

At this point I think people mistaking Shinichi as Kaito can be a running gag. The Detective Boys keep annoying Shinichi and even attempt breaking into the 'Edo house' to see the ghosts... Shinichi is still not happy. And also, when they visit Haibara, they're basically next doors so Shinichi's never going to get them out of his life.

Despite the annoyance, he eventually becomes fond of them and takes on the big brother sort of role.

When Kaito and Shinichi get acquainted, they take the DB on outings a lot. The DB is very fond of Kaito-nii-san and Shinichi-nii-san.

[moralina]

WILD NIGHTS - WILD NIGHTS! | JJ MAYBANK

Summary: JJ decides to take you on an unusual date, and maybe you should've known that with him you could possibly end the night running away from security.

Warnings: nothing to do with the poem except for the title and i thought it'd be a great way to cut the scenes with lmao, also quickly edited, wanted to write more but also wanted to post this today. fem!reader.

Wc: 1.5k

Masterlist

My latest jj blurb

Not my gif

Wild nights - Wild nights!

Were I with thee

Wild nights should be

Our luxury!

Your feet met the slippery grass with a thud, making you slightly lose your balance but quickly adjusting your footing back as soon as his hands touched yours. 

"Where are we going?" you asked, hands pulling at the sleeves of your sweater trying to find warmth within. "I'm not complaining but i'd rather stay under my warm and soft blankets, y'know"

"it's worth it, i promise." he whispered even though there was no need to. Your parents were gone for a week, letting you by yourself while they visited some distant family member who you've never really met. "now c'mon" 

his right hand closed around yours, pulling your arm and bringing you with him to the parked van on the other side of the street.

"jj" you whined, sounding too much like a child but too cold to really care. 

"it's warm in the van" 

You hummed, still dreaming about your comfortable bed. 

Yesterday you had agreed to go on a date with jj - your first official date - but it didn't cross your mind to check the weather. How would you have guessed tonight would be as freezing as the inside of a freezer, when just yesterday night you were wearing a bikini and chilling in JB's backyard with the rest of your friends, relaxing in the warmth of the night. 

However, the weather betrayed you, and decided to suddenly change drastically on the exact day you and jj decided would be your date night.

"Ohmygod." You exhaled a breath of relief, relishing in the slightly warmer atmosphere of the van. 

After a few moments of staring and smiling like a fool in love, jj started the van. 

Futile - the winds -

To a Heart in port -

Done with the Compass -

Done with the Chart!

"That's our date?"

"C'mon baby! A kook's pool all to ourselves? It's the dream!" "They have a heat pump!" His eyebrows wiggled and you stared, not really sold

"No" you shook your head "no no no- jj, if we get caught we're screwed."

"Yeah but we won't."

"And how are you so sure?"

"The cameras stopped working after the storm last week and they haven't changed them yet" he spoke matter of factly "plus, there's no one taking care of the house, they're basically asking for it" you deadpanned and he smirked. 

Typical jj behavior, you thought to yourself, should've expected it.

How on earth did you fall for this reckless boy?

"Hey, be fun at least once in your life." He said, poking your side with his index finger

"Excuse me, i am fun." 

"Keep telling yourself that." He mumbled and you huffed a laugh, eyeing him up and down 

"If the cops get us-" you started saying, slowly getting closer to him "i'll throw you to the lions and run as fast as i can"

"Deal!" He exchanged his arm, a cocky grin on his face

After jumping over the gate with jj's help you waited for him to do the same, eyes traveling around the huge backyard. You've never seen a pool so big in your life. Its was probably the size of your house.

"Those kooks, man." You muttered as jj appeared beside you.

"Yeah." He said, also taking a moment to look around the whole place.

"How did you know about this?"

"I cut their grass last week" he shrugged, "heard someone talking about the security cameras not working." 

"Oh so then you decided it'd be a good idea to just… break in?"

"Yes." He said casually. 

You rolled your eyes, but followed him nonetheless as he started walking towards the pool. 

"Even the air feels different here." 

His comment made you laugh. He wasn't necessarily wrong. Everything felt different on figure eight. Didn't mean it was better, though.

"What are you doing?" You hushed when you noticed jj taking off his sweater

"What do you think im doing?" You lifted a brow quizzically "i'm not getting into the pool with my clothes on now, am i?" 

"Yeah, but it's free-"

"Freezing, i know, i know." His sweater was thrown aimlessly to the side "But the moment i turn this pretty thing on it'll be like a huge jacuzzi, baby!" 

You waited for him to do exactly that, and when the water seemed to be at a decent temperature you began to take off your shirt. However, your eyes wined when you glanced at jj and he was moments away from getting all of his clothes off.

All of it.

"Jj" you hissed "what. Are. You. Doing!?"

"I thought skinny dipping would be more romantic." He winked before finally discarding his sweatpants and underwear to the side 

Not even a second later he started running, and before jumping straight to the water he let out the loudest scream he could master.

"We're fucked." You breathed out.

Definitely the whole neighborhood heard that, and then security would get here and see you and your-not-yet-official naked boyfriend 

"Are you planning to run away from the cops with your thing dangling between your legs?" You questioned when his head finally came back to the surface

He chuckled at your comment, once again too loudly for your liking.

"I'll give them a show, princess." His hand ran through his wet hair and something inside you clicked. The urge to throw him against the pool walls and kiss him for hours being stronger than anything else "Now get in the water." 

You hesitated, but decided to go against your gut feeling, and I guess be fun for once in your life.

When your left foot touched the warm water you allowed yourself to breathe normally again, not noticing how your breath seemed shallow before. 

Slowly, you entered the pool, your underwear getting soaked in the process. You decided not to follow jj's idea for at least this one thing. You were not getting into someone else's pool naked. And you were not going to run from the cops naked either.

Rowing in Eden -

Ah - the Sea!

Might I but moor - tonight -

In thee!

"Get back here!"

"It was nice seeing you again, Carl!" Jj waved at the poor security guard. 

As he ran in front of you, with his pants worn inside out, and his shirt not making all its way through covering his torso, was definitely a funny site, but as much as you wanted to laugh, you also needed air to keep on running.

A scream of joy left his lips and you felt so much adrenaline running through your body. Something you only really felt with jj. I mean, he was the one always dragging you around and making you participate in his wild plans. 

"You're too slow!" He screamed, momentarily looking behind him to see you running a few meters behind. 

"I'm not used to running from the cops as much as you!" You exclaimed, extending your arm forward so he could grab onto you and take you with him.

When he caught your hand you almost fell to the ground, losing your balance, once again this night, for a short second, but your legs were quick to catch on to his speed.

You only stopped running when you reached the sand. The beach was dark at this time of night, a few lights coming from the street that weren't enough to illuminate the open space.

"That was-" you heaved, trying to speak but also catching your breath

"Amazing? Thrilling? The best night of your life?!"

"It's a way to put it, yeah." You nodded your head, mouth open still trying to even your breathing.

"Did you like it?" Jj asked after a moment of silence, speaking up once again after you gave him a questioning look "our date. Did you like it?"

"It was… something." You laughed. 

Definitely an adventure. It made you feel more alive than ever, but you wouldn't say that aloud, not wanting to give jj more motivation to take you to any more fun dates

"Something good or…" he trailed off.

You couldn’t see it, mostly because he wouldn't show it, but jj was nervous. He wanted to give you a memorable date. You've already gone out thousands of times together. Sometimes only the two of you, other times as a group with all of the pogues, but you never called it a date. Before tonight your relationship didn't have a label, and he really wanted it to have. He wanted you to be his girlfriend, and he wanted to be your boyfriend. 

So yeah, it was kind of a stressful night and maybe he went too far, but hey, you had the biggest smile on your face right now. You didn't look mad. Not one bit.

"Good." You told him finally

"Good" he repeated, feeling his muscles relax.

"But we're not doing this again."

"Yup! Definitely… not doing this again."

"Jj…" 

"What? You have my word."

"Yeah, no. Definitely not trusting that."

A/n: im so anxious rn, you guys have no idea. Anyway, did this so fast I'll probably edit it again when i wake up tomorrow oof

[taihua]

tgcf=bad writing (based on that reblog THIS ISNT HATE IM JUST GENUINELY CURIOUS I REALLY LOVE U)

Allow me to elaborate! It's my favorite book so I say this with all the love in my heart for the story and characters, but--

She needed an editor: there are large sections of the book that could have been cut without changing the plot. Like Hua Cheng trying on different outfits during the Brocade Immortal arc... I know fans like this scene, but it's obvious word-padding that doesn't contribute to the story or even contribute anything significant to Hualian's relationship development. See also the endless chapters leading up to Mount Tonglu. Bloated cast and characters not contributing anything significant (why were Banyue and Pei Xiu there except to address the fact that MXTX forgot about them after book 1???) and honestly, there's a lot of boring filler around this point in the novel. Reduce and cut.

Another thing that needed editing: loose ends not being tied up. The Brocade Immortal arc is a disaster, difficult to follow, and has no lasting impact besides Ling Wen being in jail for maybe two pages. It's never explained who created Cuocuo and why and Mu Qing's involvement is handwaved even though his explanation doesn't make sense. Xie Lian puts Banyue in a jar and forgets about her for an entire arc.

The descriptions are severely lacking compared to other danmei novels. I'm not a fan of 2ha but I'm reading it anyway because I love the way the author describes the scenery, the food, the clothes, the architecture... Thousand Autumns also has some of the most beautiful passages describing the cultivation techniques. I'm sure some of this has to do with the translation teams, but TGCF also doesn't really give much to work with? The descriptions of the Ghost City are good, but the rest of the book is just kind of like. "Xie Lian was in a room. He looked around and there was a table." versus other writers who are giving us sentences like "The celadon tea set gave an aroma of jasmine where it sat on top of the mahogany table and when he picked up the teacup, it was cool against his palm." Good descriptive writing engages five senses and I don't feel that TGCF does that successfully. What do we know about heaven except that the palaces are golden?

Anyway, what she does do successfully is making an interesting world with memorable characters, even if most of them don't get the attention they deserve, and she's great with dialogue and humor. Plus the romance is good; it's not rushed and it's believable that Hualian like each other (which you'd think would be a given in romance novels, but some of the ones I've been reading lately don't bother to establish that lmao).

tldr version: too many words that aren't giving us the right info :,I

[n7punk]

“Embrace the Blame (Love the Fall”) Fic Notes

EtB(LtF) is done! For what feels like the first time in a while, a fic managed not to get away from me lol, it just got a little epilogue continuation but otherwise was all good.

Epilogue Life:

I have so many thoughts it’s hard cutting them off.

Adora’s trip home is hard, but it is good overall, and she realizes during it that the reason Hope hasn’t mentioned church when talking is because she doesn’t go a lot anymore (more details lower down). Adora certainly wasn’t going to go with her — Shadow is guaranteed to be there, and Adora can’t be held liable for what she does the next time they meet — but church is pretty much never brought up during her visit. Hope still isn’t perfect, but she’s trying her best, and though Adora discovers bad memories around town along with the good, it turns out to be a lot easier to process now that Catra is back in her life. She kind of tells Hope that she’d like to see her again at Christmas, but in a noncommittal way since she really doesn’t know what that will hold for them.

The rest of the summer is just good. Catra’s internship is hard but valuable, as is Adora’s job assisting Netossa, and they both still have more time than they would during the school year to just be together and have fun with their friends. It’s great for bonding and falling deeper in love, and for integrating their friend groups properly in a way they just didn’t really have time for before.

Catra isn’t ready to go home that Christmas — isn’t sure she ever wants to — and when Adora regretfully informs Hope she doesn’t want to leave Catra alone for Christmas, they take another big step and Hope comes to visit them for the first time. It’s a little weird, but Catra is more comfortable seeing Hope again on their turf, and it turns out to be a good Christmas even around the bittersweet parts. Hope expresses approval for Catra to the best of her ability and that kind of takes Catra out for the afternoon. She doesn’t cry, but that doesn’t mean she’s not emotional enough to.

When they do finally visit home again, it’s a year later, after they have both graduated, Catra a few months established in a role at the company she interned with and Adora freshly moved to a job at a pottery studio, which isn’t exactly where she wants to be, but hey, it’s in her sector. They aren’t visiting because of work, though — they’re engaged and planning their wedding, which absolutely isn’t going to be back home, or be traditional, but they come back for the visit to celebrate and to get some of Adora’s old things from Hope. It’s just a few days, but Catra doesn’t have a bad experience like she feared and she’s more willing to come back for occasional visits to Hope after that, even if their hometown is never going to be her favorite place.

(Like I said, I can keep going, so I’ll just put Shadow’s reaction to that news lower down because I need to at least break this up)

Also I fully planned for Glimmer and Bow to get together in this but then they needed to not be together up until chapter seven and there just wasn’t room to fit it in at that point BUT know that they get together over the summer and everybody ends up laughing about how dumb they were lmao.

Chapter 1:

⦁ Title is from “There’s People Watching” by Jade LeMac.

⦁ I had to edit the fic disclaimer because uhhhh a lot of things happened in this fic I didn’t initially plan. I went into this fic pantsing everything past like, chapter one, so I didn’t know the flashbacks were coming up or any of the partying stuff. Some of this stuff is things I generally avoid, but ideas adjacent to them have come up before, so I decided to just go all in on All The Stuff for this fic.

⦁ Originally this fic opened with a (very brief) flashback scene of the night Catra left, and then I moved it to the opening of chapter 2, but that just wasn’t right so I included Adora remembering that line and that was it.

⦁ The food/dining halls/library/dorms in this fic are just straight up the ones from my own college.

⦁ For non-Americans, Title IX is basically our diversity/inclusion act so like if someone is discriminating against you based on gender or whatever (in a school setting) it protects you.

Chapter 2:

⦁ Title is from “So What Now” By Renee Rapp.

⦁ There was a while there would I would spin the wheels of my little Lego tuk tuk whenever I was in a virtual appointment and that’s where the car thing came from.

⦁ Shoutout to my freshmen year neighbor who would shout “papi” while having makeup sex.

⦁ “Catra flashes her a smile, the innocent one that has always pulled on something inside Adora she never understood but somehow makes her very aware of her tongue in her mouth.” Gee it’s almost like you want to stick your tongue down her throat or something.

⦁ Adora talking about how Catra didn’t change here was explicitly to set up the slow realization that she did. The  theme of this fic is change and growth, really — both when it happens and when it doesn’t. No matter how they change, they still were those little girls and that’s so important to how they are now and they can’t let that love they had go. They can’t change in a way that makes them not love each other and even when Adora didn’t change and it was hurting Catra, Catra loved her then, too.

⦁ I mentioned it in my notes here, but I’ve written some of these story beats out of a lot of fics. Tip of her tongue was initially a hiding sexuality story, with Catra running after kissing Adora because the girl who interrupted them called her a dyke and she didn’t want Adora to have to deal with that. Catra cut her hair and everything to put the “blame” on her, it was a whole thing. I had a high school AU dealing with Adora pretending to be straight for a while that never went anywhere too. I finally “got” to do my comphet story here, by which I mean I could have done it at any time but I both didn’t and just got in my head about not wanting to when I kind of did, so I’m glad to have finally gotten it out of my head.

Chapter 3:

⦁ Title is from “There’s People Watching” by Jade LeMac again.

⦁ “Send me something cute” with a wink means “send me a selfie” but Catra’s too resigned for that.

⦁ Catra did NOT buy her sweater, it was her Castaspella Assigned Sweater her first Christmas with Glimmer’s family.

⦁ By complete accident a video about video game elevators came up and played while I was in the middle of writing the elevator scene. As Adora was trying to awkwardly say she didn’t look the narrator went “You can use elevators to force characters into awkward conversation” with a shot of an anime that I swear looked like RGU but I’ve never seen that show and don’t know if elevators exist in it, it was just a hell of a coincidence.

Chapter 4:

⦁ Uhhhh this wasn’t supposed to be here. There was a single paragraph in the last chapter talking about times they had kissed before, and then I went to do a fic note expanding on it, and I… just couldn’t stop. So this happened.

⦁ Here’s an abbreviated version of what that note looked like: Times Catra and Adora kissed: - 1 We definitely need to know how to kiss for this party - 2 I’ll show you how to kiss for your boyfriend (please like it better with me)  - 3 Weaver was being homophobic and Catra kissed Adora out of nowhere when she was comforting her, which Adora interpreted as Catra coming out to her. For two days afterwards Catra thought there was a slim chance, despite Adora’s clueless responses on the night of, that they might be dating before a Very Straight comment from Adora brought Catra down to earth. - 4 Actual spin the bottle in the hallway during a school dance. - 5 :) Wouldn’t you like to know (This is the drunk makeout scene, which I didn’t actually write because I wasn’t comfortable doing it for consent reasons. Drunk makeouts can be agreed on and fine (see Glimmer and Catra) but with all the shame Adora felt from it and with her being shitfaced, it didn’t feel good to actually outline, so I skipped to the aftermath instead, which I think better showed Adora’s internalized shame and how it caused her to reject Catra anyway.)

⦁ Whenever I need a random background NPC I just pull up the He-Man wiki and look at the characters list for something that fits enough from the original She-ra. Yes, it’s not a reliable source of information, but I’d hope it’s base character names are at least correct. Aliases I’m less confident in lol.

⦁ “He’ll want to impress you. That’s what I’d do.” That’s what you’d do? Something you want to share with the class, Catra? It seems like you’ve thought about this a lot.

⦁ Catra’s insistence on teenage boys sucking is partially the gender norms Shadow perpetuates, partially her own repulsion to the entire idea of heterosexuality she doesn’t quite have a handle on yet, and part of her trying to convince Adora of all those ideas so Adora will just ignore all those boys and only be her friends for tooooootally normal reasons <3 Definitely.

⦁ Catra was not invited to Caleb’s party, btw, it was just a (pretty obvious) condition of Adora’s attendance that Catra would be there too. Because besties don’t let besties miss out on parties or leave the other alone for their first “real” kiss. Obviously.

⦁ I just find these freshmen being sure high school is like on TV and all sophomores must have done ton of kissing hilarious, but it’s a very Kid thing to believe.

⦁ When I was a kid the game Trace Memory taught me the word crud because the protagonist Ashley said it whenever, you know, you would normally say a swear word. This led to me saying it a lot because it was something I could “get away with” before my mom informed me I could not, actually, get away with it. To this day my mom (who isn’t religious, by the way) insists that crap, damn, and hell are all Swear Words, which I disagree with. I mean those last two, sure, I just don’t ascribe to Christianity. “Crap” though? What the fuck? That is not a “swear word”. It might not be an innocent word, but it is not a fucking swear by any means. You do not have to bleep it out or limit the number of them that appear in a movie to maintain a PG-13 rating or whatever (rumor is you get one “fuck” btw).

⦁ My dark elf lore comes from Knifepoint, with Shadow Weaver’s appearance generally matching her Mystacor look and “dark elves” dubbed so because they are a race of elves with a high degree of photosensitivity that must either cover up or avoid the sunlight to avoid burns and a greatly increased risk of cancer. More info in my “Races” fic extra if you’re interested.

⦁ Shadow’s “reminders” for Adora to bring Catra are both because she thinks Catra is more likely to listen to Adora, and to reinforce for them both what a model daughter should look like. She makes Catra see Adora following expectations every time they see each other, later telling Catra that is what she should be like and slowly driving an uncomfortable wedge between them, reinforcing that Catra will never be Adora and never be good enough for her.

⦁ If I remember the puritan crime severity ranking right, it goes like Blasphemy > Adultery > Murder, which is why Adora brings it up in reference to Shadow’s own sin ranking list. That, and the rumor is that the reason Shadow’s life is how it is is because her husband left her (true) for committing adultery (ehhh it was mostly just because she was a terrible person) so she has dedicated the rest of her life to making herself appear “upstanding” by society’s standards after she “failed in her duties as a wife” (the way the church sees it — she doesn’t feel she has duties to anyone but herself, but she wants them to perceive her as capable), which is actually why she ended up fostering Catra, to appear as close as she could to the vision of a woman put together. She also… has the whole fucked up thing where she “relates” to Catra and wants to make things as hard for her as possible because she thinks she sees herself in her and life was never fair to her (she says in her $800,000 house).

⦁ The coming out scene takes place following one of the incidents Catra alludes to later at the party.

⦁ Adora vision: Oh, she’s kissing me so that I know she’s gay and for no other reason. I will not examine this further.

⦁ I’m convinced spin the bottle isn’t real tbqh, but this fic is me finally doing all the high school &college tropes I haven’t done or have only brushed against over the years, so yeah, it gets thrown in there.

⦁ Alright the spin the bottle scene I wrote in the car so the names just got pulled out of my ass.

Chapter 5:

⦁ Chapter title is from She’s Pretty by Beth McCarthy

⦁ Scorpia is watching “She Loves To Eat”, a lesbian manga/TV show that my friends have loved. It’s actually about all kinds of food but “cooking” just felt weird in that sentence (like it implies some kind of Top Chef thing) so I went with baking.

⦁ Lesbians will literally hide under the bed and call it romantic instead of admitting their feelings.

⦁ It was honestly hard to type Christmas in a fic instead of Winterfest lmao. Making Christianity exist is really antithetical to my usual views. Winterfest is a stand-in for a number of holidays, including New Years traditions, but new years is secular so I usually still leave mention of it as the name for the final day of Winterfest.

⦁ The Dean’s Spotlight is like, another version of a thing we did have at my school, shifted to the left. For this fic the spotlight is basically the faculty nominating the student they think is the best showcase of their school (academics, extracurriculars, and standards wise). Fall highlights one senior and spring nominates one junior, so you only ever have two chances of being picked, but it’s a great networking opportunity.

⦁ Hope doesn’t mention church here because she stopped going every week. She still does it a lot, but while she could go and punish herself with guilt for the rest of her life, there came a point where she just couldn’t keep doing it to Adora once it started to cost her their relationship. Adora brought a little of Mara’s glow back into her life and she couldn’t lose that joy again She did go to church the next Sunday after their phone call though, and made a point of sitting next to Shadow, who of course noticed and struck up “polite conversation” (digging for information as to why she’s approaching her since she usually doesn’t). Hope wasn’t fooled and told her she was just thinking of her because she spoke with Adora that week and she was thinking how much more they used to see each other when they were coordinating their daughters’ playdates. Shadow’s response was “Yes, that will change when your daughter goes off to college and stops speaking to you in favor of a life of sin”. No matter how coolly it was spoken it was the exact opening Hope needed. “Yes, I suppose she has been busy”. This immediately piqued Shadow’s interest because while it wasn’t the first thing Hope ever said about Catra post Catra cutting Shadow off, it was the first in a long time (she said it was not her business to meddle in family at first and barely said anything even before the fallout. She might not have hated Shadow — at the time — but she also didn’t wholly agree with what she saw of her parenting philosophies). Shadow’s response was something to the effect of “What has she gotten herself into now?” to which Hope responded “Nothing bad, making Dean’s Spotlight just takes a lot of work. It’s not an honor lightly earned. Adora could use learning some of her discipline”. Hope wasn’t actually trying to shit on Adora, just make the conversation seem more natural. It’s something she might have said back when Adora was in high school, which was the last time she and Shadow really spoke frequently. Shadow said some stuff about Adora having discipline in other important areas (unaware she came out) and tried to lightly pry for more but Hope got a lot more reluctant to speak after that.

Chapter 6:

⦁ Chapter title from Not My Fault by Renee Rapp and Megan Thee Stallion

⦁ Adora’s whole thing about Bow wanting in a different way than she does is just from how the idea that sometimes it feels like everyone else must be fine on the inside or feeling some pure ideal of emotion instead of everyone just being fucking messy like you, but when you assume everyone else is feeling the Pure™️ kind of sadness with just yearning and no Problematic Jealousy™️ you’re just setting yourself up for disaster because everyone’s emotions are messy.

⦁ Man I miss the art studio I did my freshmen year art project in. Sure, working in it was fucking miserable when it was hot out, but all the light was so great and despite the noise having a fume and particulate hood was really handy. I’ve been doing a lot more crafts project recently and I just do them in my “office” which is a tiny bedroom with a single window that’s on the side of the house that never gets any light it’s sad.

⦁ Lonnie picked up everything Catra was putting down and found it hilarious considering she and Adora were just friends. She wasn’t surprised when Adora started gushing about her girlfriend not long after.

Chapter 7:

⦁ Title from “Friendship Bracelet” by Beth McCarthy

⦁ Adora started freaking out as soon as she got on the phone with Catra for obvious reasons, but she was also internally worried that Catra had attached to someone else there who might not have her best interests.

⦁ They are having two entirely different conversations while Adora is trying to get Catra home. The second Catra says she wants something and Adora stops, her drunk mind assumes Adora knows what she wanted (her) and when she says she can have it when they get home, Catra just goes yayyy make out time! Meanwhile Adora is just like work with me here and you can get as bitey as you want okay. They are living in two different worlds as usual.

⦁ So the original outline of this scene was uh. A little darker. I’ll be honest, I find the final version of the drunk Catra scenes very funny because I love sloppy Catra, but the original outline of the scene called for her getting further in trying to kiss Adora and then crying more than she did and kind of rambling all her insecurities and outright asking Adora why she was toying with her. The final version is the right version.

Chapter 8:

⦁ If I have to tell you this chapter’s title is from “Curious” by Hayley Kiyoko I really don’t know why you’re here.

⦁ Adora does eventually convince Catra to visit the student counseling center, but it isn’t until the next semester, and Catra doesn’t make it a long term habit, just going in for a few sessions to work through some stuff and moving on. There’s processing to do, but she is also one of those people where talking about it only helps so much until it hurts instead.

⦁ Adora got that hopeful smile because Catra’s eyes blew out when she stepped into her view, just like she did the night before, and then she slow-blinked at her immediately after not denying she wanted the things she asked her for last night, but Catra as freaking out a little too much to be that self-aware.

⦁ Not to be NSFW for a teen fic but I do think this Catradora take a little longer than normal to get intimate, but once Adora is comfortable and ready she’s all in.

⦁ The kiss motivation method is an actual thing me and my girlfriend did freshmen year and yes it helps the ADHD but it also makes it worse because you’re thinking about getting the next kiss instead of the dumb textbook lmao.

Chapter 9:

⦁ Title is from “I Think I’m Growing?” by Fletcher.

⦁ This was supposed to be the end of chapter eight, but it felt more right to split it off and make it its own thing, even if it makes for a very short epilogue. It keeps chapter eight the same length as all the rest of the normal chapters (minus the 5 + 1 shoved in the middle of this fic) too, so I decided to split it off even though I was hoping not to increase the chapter count on this one. I have a really terrible habit but my policy is always what’s best for the story and not what’s best for a number so splitting off these “looking forward” scenes was right.

⦁ Entrapta’s relationship with her parents is largely transactional and they just aren’t close at all, so she has to consider the scenario where they deem the transaction “isn’t worth it” anymore. It’s not actually something that would happen, but they just have a weird relationship overall. They aren’t bad people (I mean, they aren’t Shadow), just busy and kind of neglectful, so Entrapta finds a lot more support in her friends, and wanting to be with those friends and have community she didn’t experience growing up is why she likes to share an apartment.

⦁ The waterpark is based on an actual park I used to visit that could hold (and usually did hold) thousands of people at once. The pools would just be seas of bodies, it was insane. I haven't been in years and probably won't ever again because swimming and masking don't exactly mix. It was often manned by college students in the summer rushes, though.

⦁ Okay continuing from the epilogue section: Shadow’s reaction to them getting engaged. True to the protocol of the first few years, Hope doesn’t really tell Shadow anything that’s going on in their lives after that time Adora drops hints for her to, and she sees her a lot more rarely as Hope starts to fade in her faith, so she goes back to just brushing her prying off for years. The engagement is big enough to break that form, especially because Catra drops hints again when they visit that maybe Shadow should know about it. Hope goes back to church the weekend after they leave (her first time in a month — listen, going a few weeks between visits is “falling off” for her. She visits once every month or two at this point, but she is still involved in certain initiatives she deems important, like the annual toy drive). When standing around with a bunch of the older ladies afterwards talking — Shadow included — they’re talking about their “joys” that week and Hope says that hers is that her daughter just got engaged. Shadow is immediately alert as the church ladies offer Hope congratulations and Hope is just quiet and gracious about it. When asked about Adora’s suitor, Hope just says they visited together that week and it’s good to see her so in love. She’s lucky to be marrying her best friend. The ladies just aww and talk about how it’s a shame they had to leave before Sunday so they couldn’t meet them, but Shadow know what that means, and she’s quietly seething. Honestly it’s mostly impressive that she waits until she can catch Hope in semi-private out in the parking lot that she asks if she’s allowing that, which like, wicked not her choice dude, but it’s more like is she enabling it and acting like it’s okay. The answer is just “yes” and Hope ignores her protests otherwise, continuing on to her car. Shadow definitely considers outing them to hopefully have the rest of their congregation exert pressure on Hope for Hope to exert pressure on Adora and Catra to “correct”, but ultimately it would expose her own “failure as a parent” when it came to raising Catra “right”, so it just becomes a “painful secret” for her to bare.

Original Outline:

Since I was wicked winging this one, there really wasn’t an original outline to deviate from. Basically I had the entire first chapter outlined and then… nothing else. Sometimes it’s fun to do a fanfic off the cuff like that.

The one “big change” was my original idea had Catra living in an apartment with the BFS, but I wanted one of them to live on campus.

I also had this vague idea (inspired by “I only smoke to feel bad” by KiNG MALA) where Catra would have another friend group and they would kind of be stoners. She would have someone in that group who she sometimes kind of hooked up with (I went with Glitra instead) and after reconnecting with Adora, Catra goes to one of their hangouts, gets high with them, and then freaks out when that girl gets flirty with her because she’s in a weird frame of mind and suddenly all she wants is Adora again and this just feels very wrong. Because she’s anxious-high she doesn’t do the logical thing of “hey I’m not feeling this” and instead leaves to call Adora to come pick her up. She doesn’t explain much other than “I’m high and I want to go home” at which point Adora is immediately out the door and not leaving her to navigate the bus system. It was supposed to help push them a little more towards being vulnerable with each other as Adora takes her home and tries to take care of her, because I was envisioning their relationship as still being kind of antagonistic at that point.

You can see how that idea became the party scene. There were  some things with that I just didn’t want to write, and I think the party version is way more fun, more logical with the set up of the world and characters (which didn’t exist when I had that first idea), and more fitting for where they were in the story.

Aside from that and stuff previously mentioned, it was all off the cuff.

Meta:

Playlist

Upcoming:

To be 100% honest next I’m going to work on my SPOP Big Bang fic which y’all aren’t going to see for months, but then I’m probably going to do the ******** AU. Not saying exactly what that is because a certain subset of people are going to be feral for it  and I know it’s at least going to be a bit before I’m ready for it, but since there’s a whole fic between here and there my whims could change too. We’ll see! Updates on my Tumblr as always.

[crescencestudio]

Intertwine Post-Mortem

i lied. i don’t know if this qualifies as a post mortem. i don’t even know what a post mortem is LMFAOkxkak

but this is my post intertwine release “devlog” chock full of dev experiences, behind the scenes looks, and more for those who want to know more about the process of creating intertwine and thoughts i’ve had in reflection of release/experiencing otojam!

it’s long bc in usual crescence fashion, a bitch loves to talk. so buckle in gamers!

my thank u offering for all the downloads and reviews

Committing to OtoJam

for those who didn’t know, i entered otojam on a sort of Whim. because i am deep in the alaris trenches, i didn’t want to distract myself for too long from my main game, especially when there are people who have paid to support development. after talking to some friends, i thought otojam would actually be good for me. i’d been struggling with burnout and was in a creative rut. on top of that, i’d been doing this dev thing for almost 2 years with no full game to show for it (cries). even if otojam would take time away from alaris, perhaps it would give me what i needed—a kick of Motivation, a dash of Creativity, and some GD Fun.

so i decided about two days into otojam to officially enter it! And thus Intertwine made its appearance

the graphic that started it all

Oh, we are Otojamming

the intertwine editing team assembled and we got to work. because i already had a pretty solid idea of the game (it had been an idea i was sitting on for a while), there was less time spent on brainstorming and more time spent on writing and editing the script. for playtesters, i already have a group for alaris, and a couple of them kindly offered to playtest intertwine for otojam. i spontaneously decided to cast a va after some discussions with the editing team, and max joined. then, with One Week left of otojam, faefield productions entered the scene!

regarding development, the first month was largely dedicated to the script. weeks 1-2 were writing and fleshing out. weeks 3-4 were dedicated to editing and fine tuning. when my editors were reviewing the script, i was creating all the art assets. after the first month, i would say we had most of the gui, one cg, and the base sprite done!

at that time i felt pretty good. we were making good progress! i even was productive on alaris and irl work!

then the Second Month happened lmao.

i always forget the Horrors of fine tuning a build. i’m projecting right now, but i’d argue a lot of developers forget or underestimate the fine tuning/ quality testing stage. during the 4th-6th weeks of otojam, i wrapped up all the assets needed for the beta build. i finished the remaining cgs, all sprite expressions, and the rest of the gui. then i coded all the features into a beta version: learning how to create a messaging system for the first time, nailing the multiple iteration mechanic, cutting and editing the voice acting audio, and other Horrors that i’m sure i’ve since blacked out from my memory all happened during the sixth week of otojam. i was truly in the Coding Trenches.

BUT i got the build done and was able to send it out to playtesters for a week of quality testing. spoiler alert: the build wasn’t perfect and there were many bugs that needed fixing. the seventh week—the second to last week of otojam—was dedicated to this as well as my own tinkering so that the build felt completely Perfect (making sure expressions r exactly how i want them, transitions and audio fade perfectly, animations are perfect, that godforsaken clickable string to get to the next iterations that No One was clicking. all of the tiny aspects that make a game feel really polished). I am Not good with grinding. Suffice to say this was probably the most miserable week.

me every hour: DID U CLICK THE STRING

But once again WE MADE IT! Near the end of the seventh week, orpheo of faefield productions reached out to me and after gushing to each other about how big of a fan we are of one another, we spontaneously collaborated for a custom OST. Enter the eighth week, and we were ALL grinding. playtesters trying out a second build within only two days. editing team making fine tuning edits for the best script. coding. voiced lines that needed the slightest bit of tinkering.

Come 3PM on june 30th (otojam ends 6pm june 30th) and i’m coding the new music room, adding and double checking the new ost, and more. Two hours pass and it’s 5PM. We have less than an hour to submit. 5:30something comes by and with shaky hands, i release the game page and submit to otojam.

flashbacks to college 11:59 deadlines fr

On top of last week crunching, i was also dealing with extreme prerelease stress. i’ve never released a full game before. a demo, i can change. i can still tinker. this isn’t the final product. But a Full Game? My god. what if ppl hate it? or worse, what if ppl are so apathetic, they don’t even look at it and it gets sent to the void? after all, this year’s entries are stunning. they are Bold and Creative and Fun and intertwine is so….

Boring?

Some Lessons—Take Them or Leave Them

lesson 1. don’t listen to prerelease anxiety. that is the devil talking to you. if u have friends at least they will play and be nice to u. if u don’t have friends and no one plays, well it’s not the end of the world!!!! there’s always the next game. and u fckn know what? at least u Made that shit. keep ur head high, icon.

lesson 2. have fun and take care of yourself. the reception to intertwine has been amazing. i couldn’t be happier with it. but at the end of the day, the reason i look back on otojam fondly is because of the very dear friends i had to support me and have fun with me thru it all. life is meant to be enjoyed. it’s meant to be about memories, not metrics! never forget what’s truly important in life (cheesy, everyone boos me, but i’m right idgaf)

where would i be without them

lesson 3. plan. there is room for spontaneity and flexibility. after all, u can’t guarantee everything will go to plan. but with otojam being a crunch, plan as much as you can beforehand to not stress urself out during it. with intertwine, i had a somewhat outline and at least a pretty good idea of the concept, game mechanics, narrative design, mood board, etc. i had character concept art of van. if i had to do all of this during otojam we wouldn’t have made it i’m so srs. i also think when u plan as much as u can before, u have more room and time to have fun during! more polished build and more loving memories it’s a win win.

early concept art tbh i never thought it’d see the light of day

Typical Brand of Crescence Cheesiness

if you’ve made it this far ur a real one. all i have left to say is thank you for the support. while i was proud of intertwine (until the last week of otojam lol), i didn’t know what the response would be. to receive so many kind words has been unbelievably heartwarming.

as i said before, i’ve been in this game dev thing for 2 years with nothing to rly show for it. but during otojam, i could really feel the skills and experiences i’ve gained shine thru. i had a better handle on narrative design, coding things, integrating gui, and even more dev friends to talk to (thank u to all my friends who have played and messaged me U DONT KNOW HOW MUCH I LUV U). it was rewarding in a different sense compared to releasing a game, and i really am glad i did otojam to give me that perspective <3

a lot of things seemed to cockblock otojam this year (or so i’ve heard) between the sheer amount of entries (go us tho), the release of a lot of aaa otome games, and then twitter literally breaking less than 24 hours after otojam ended. even with all that, i’ve been so humbled and honored to see ppl enjoy intertwine. the comments i’ve gotten have honestly made me emotional, with many of you comparing it to games that i heavily admire and or expressing emotions i never would’ve dreamed to have been able to instill.

the otojam experience has been incredible, from the memories to the game to the reception. and i’m very grateful for all the people who made it that way! thank you for enjoying our silly little game made with our grubby little fingies. i hope you all continue to enjoy intertwine (and the other otojam entries from this year) and van!

i luv u all!

[greatsylveon2007]

"Kids with passion to play make-believe;

Will become young adults with the will to achieve"

Alright, so I figured I wanted to make this eventually. I finally finished my part for the Guaraná MAP a few months ago after like, almost two years of having it lmao, and those two years were wild and included a bunch of different versions of the part which would never see the light of day outside of the map server, so I figured I should put them all here :)

Here is the finished part which I am very happy with honestly, love some Hollyleaf angst

So now let me tell you about how the part used to be IWKFOLSPS

To get the part I actually had to fist fight a friend because it was one of the few really simple interesting parts and we both wanted it pretty badly

When I eventually got the part I made two storyboards for it, and my idea was for it to be very limited animation with mostly tweening, as, in my head, it would make my life easier

The first storyboard I was not happy with so I threw it out the window and made another soon after

This one I was way happier with and is the storyboard I used for most of these two years, here you can see a little light/shadow behind Hollyleaf that, while I liked, was really out of place so I didn't keep it in the end :(

What followed was multiple months of me chipping away at this part and telling myself every time that it would be easy to do because it was pmv, I got pretty far with this, making the assets for all of the cats and only needing to shade Hollyleaf, finish the backgrounds and guaraná plants and edit

At that point however, despite being almost done, I really couldn't bring myself to work on this part anymore, I'm not sure what exactly it was, but messing around with all the assets and tweening and all that just wasn't fun for me at that point and I just began stalling to avoid having to open the file again

Eventually in February a light shone upon me, if I wasn't having fun with PMV then screw it AMV was my new best friend

In a few hours I made a new sketch, skipped the rought animation stage and finished Holly's entire animation (don't do this ever, don't be like me)

I had also started on Lion but I was struggling on what to do with him because of how I animated Holly lol

I don't remember the exact plan but originally the character acting was:

Holly and Lion are looking up, Jay is a little frustrated. Holly talks to him to cheer him up and he looks at her, feeling a bit more encouraged. Then she would look at Lion, he would reassure her, and they'd all end up happy

Somehow though, while animating Holly, I ditched the plan and made her be surprised by Lion and look at him, so I struggled a bit trying to figure out what Lionpaw could do to get her attention, and spent a good while trying to figure out the solution to a problem that I created in a few hours of not following a simple plan ISMOCKSKKDS If you plan something, preferably follow it, don't be like me²

I could have just remade her animation so that would have been solved but I liked her animation I didn't want to redo it :(

Anyway, eventually I figured he could say something stupid to help cheer up Jay or something and I like his and Jay's new movements so it all worked out :)

After making the first shot, I caved in to something I wanted to do for a while which was a transition between the shots, instead of having it cut to the second shot or move the characters around a little bit.

I didn't know if I wanted to do a transition with stars or with the fire scene, until eventually I figured that the fire scene and Ashfur's... thing was what really affected the siblings, especially Hollyleaf. The part also follows a sequence of Hollyleaf feeling guilty for what she did so in general I thought that Ashfur would transition well

You may also notice that I hadn't splattered blood all across Holly's face in the second shot and that was because I forgot she was supposed to have blood on her until I read the script again for some reason and realized I forgot ISNKCKAKDLSL

So, what did we learn? PMV sucks, animate it all at 24 fps in one sitting instead/JOKE

This is all I have about the Guaraná part, it was pretty fun to work on and I loved joining a map about my country, this map lives in a little part of my brain rent free <3

Might do this for other parts that have a bunch of wips or something I'll think about that, it's kind of fun to just lay out your process like this, would recommend 10/10

[uchihaharlot]

CEO! AU Where their employee is too naive about innuendo 😅

Too pure and these guys wreck her during a personal "meeting" in their office.

(Separate scenarios please 🙏)

Me dearest moot,

I apologize this took me so long. 😅 I find it hard to write ooc scenes, but then again everything written outside the Narutoverse is considered ooc. So I just rolled with it, didn’t feel it at first. Sat on it, went back edited it — added more and hopefully the outcome is to your standards.

I truly am committed to writing almost any ask that is sent my way.

I do apologize, this got lengthy. I cannot not write anything less than 3k it seems when in the mood. Lmao. I give you smut with minor plot, because I love a bit of backstory and I adore characters that have a familiarity between them or some fluffy shit like that.

(When I wrote this, I was not aware of your preference for Itachi at the time. Shisui CEO was already in the works. Honestly am not entirely convinced this is good. I would be willing to do Itachi in a separate ask, I just didn’t want this to be like 15k of figuring my shit out).

NSFW; airhead-ish intern; smut w/plot; praise kink; oral; vaginal; unprofessional work environment; sex at work; Enjoy!

wc: an exorbitant fucking 3.4k; fuck and I’m not editing it much more right now. Will go back, I just felt like the worlds biggest piece of shit for taking so long lol

As fresh blood in the world of accounting, credentials meant everything. Especially if you want roll with the big boys. Which is why when accepting an internship nearly six months ago from the most prestigious accounting firm, you didn’t hesitate to accept. It would look good on your resume and if lucky enough, you’d be offered a job and avoid the hassle of sending out hundreds of applications.

So far things have been mild and mundane.

Coffee this, tea that. Dry cleaning. You hardly even made an appearance into the conference room except on few occasions.

Today was one of those days your presence was requested. Shisui Uchiha, CEO, owner and founder of Tomoe LLC. An accounting firm for high profiled clients.

Yea, your designated boss was that guy.

The one who made tabloids left and right with his fuck you money and all. The guy who probably had every woman in the office, including yourself, humid and longing. Didn’t even have to try, and there was no lying. How unfortunate you had the hots for him. Regardless of your stance, you retained the upmost professionalism in his presence.

When Shisui walks into the conference room, all eyes are on him. Composed, clean cut and admirable. As an intern your job is to take minute notes, jot ideas he spouts off and anything of importance. At the end of his hour and a half long ramble. Everyone is dismissed.

‘Except you.’ Words you didn’t really expect, but nonetheless did as you were told.

Once the room is cleared, Shisui’s gaze catches yours. Sharp and observant, you felt under the microscope of his heavy dark eyed gaze. ‘I need your help on something.’

Which was great, usually.

This is what you’re here for. If it was coffee, you’d fetch it. If it was picking his dog up from the groomers, that too. You got to use his shiny new car, which was a treat. He made sure you knew nobody before you had that privilege.

‘I’m listening, Uchiha-san.’ Submissive and severely cute as you retained his attention. Even if unintentional, it made his eyes flicker whenever you called him that and he straightened up a bit. A smug grin on his face.

Ever the good girl.

Shisui taps at your laptop, quickly you open its notebook app, ready to record his thoughts. ‘I want you to draft your own document on project of your choosing. Consider it a ‘review.’ How can you make this company grow?’

Oh, it was one of those reviews. The preliminary ‘give me your thoughts and maybe you can have a job’ situation. He continues, ‘on one condition… meet me in my office after work. And we’ll discuss it more personally.’

‘Anything specific I should focus on?’ It wasn’t confusing, but you had the sense there was something particular he was looking for.

He smiles and gazes over you. Shisui always said he appreciated your tenacity and go-getter attitude. ‘Just whatever comes to mind; nothing too serious…..when you write this document, just remember it's for me. It should be tailored to suggestions you think I would….be interested in.’

‘Right, for you…for the company.’ You sheepishly smile back. Why was the room hot, why did your stomach disappear and leave you feeling sick almost. Not in a terrible way, but well….no. He’s your damned boss!!

‘Good girl.’ Something crawled up your spine when he said those words. Your body treasonously gushed, and it was hard not to flush warm in the cheeks. ‘Make sure to send this off before you stop by my office. It would be…beneficial for me to know before we further discuss this in a personal setting.’

A personal setting. After work.

You weren’t stupid by any means, part of you truly believed your boss was hitting on you and the other half was partial to the fact Shisui just knew how to get what he wanted. So, for the last few hours of your day, you focused on real issues within the company. You didn’t want to insult him, but there were things that could improve the numbers and have an impact. Small minute details you picked up the last few months. The document was sent off the last half hour of the day before you walked down to the elevator and took it three floors up to where the higher-ranking individuals in the company were stationed.

Maybe you could be up here. Maybe your ideas would actually mean something. A small smile spreads your face before you knock on his office door.

When Shisui opens the door, he immediately steps aside and motions for you to enter. That’s good sign, right? His gaze lingers as you take in the office that you see maybe three times a month. Your actual duties are handed down to the secretary on your floor directly from him.

A soft click of the door closing has your nerves striking flint at one another.

‘I like how you took this assignment so seriously….’ Taking a seat at his desk, hands folded together. He takes her in.

‘You’re not offended?’ Of course not! The numbers didn’t lie, you had found a hole in his company’s bottomline. Money was being filtered out. If anything, he was grateful you did this so thoroughly.

Shisui’s eyes seem almost piercing, ‘I’m not offended at all. In fact, it’s impressive. Very impressive….now exactly how did you figure this out?’

Oh, that was a toughie. It was by accident, really, you explain. Within the first few weeks of your internship, you were granted access to classified information. Unsure if this was even allowed, you figured that if a potential job was to be had. You needed to know the numbers. Unfortunately for Shisui, undoubtedly, someone was stealing money from him. He had his suspicions prior to your upheaval, but no real way of confirming without causing the perpetrator to become aware. Aside from that it was intricately encrypted, meaning you were incapable of providing further details of who.

Shisui eyes you the whole time, his unwavering gaze felt unkind almost, but sincere. ‘So, you were just casually going through the inflow and outflow. Just so happen to discover…. money missing?’

You exhale heavily, this sounded like it could backfire. ‘Y-yes. I’m sorry if that was a breach of my contract, I figured if I was granted access—’

Shisui’s light chuckle interrupts you, a sort of calm, almost relieved feeling washes down your nerves. ‘You’re fine, I admire your determination and commitment to this company. It seems I can’t trust everyone here…’

‘I suggest, if you’re open to it…. calling tech support, they might be able…’ the words hit your face from the floor. Someone in tech support would be the perfect position to lay low and hide or dispose of backlogs. Shisui quirks an eyebrow at your acute observation. ‘Tech support would be able to see behind all of that.’

At first, he is surprised, then perturbed. Tech support would be capable of seeing behind the encryption or worse. Creating it. Leaning back in his chair, he folds his hands under to his chin. ‘A smart observation….that is….unfortunate. For them, if so.’ A hint of admiration in his voice has you smiling at his praise.

Shisui can’t help but stare at you for a moment. That smile is adorable, even more when you’re not completely flustered by him. When you’re almost comfortable in his presence. ‘You’re a very sharp girl…and you have a good grasp of this business despite being just an intern….’

‘It’s nothing….really. I was just…trying to get on top of the game.’ A soft shrug is all you manage. What else could you say? Now wasn’t the time to toot your own horn.

Shisui leans forward in his chair. He can't help but notice you’re a still bit shy, reserved and overtly quiet in his presence. More times often than not are you loud and boisterous with the friends you’ve made here. Something lurches in the back of his mind; his tone of voice softens.

‘I’d like to commend you for your efforts. You’ve outdone yourself and even figured out someone is potentially funneling money from me.’ He pauses briefly, ‘just out of curiosity though….why did you accept this internship?’

The harsh truth resurfaced with a prejudice. You were bitter the first few weeks, though you were grateful for this opportunity here. Not a word back from a single firm within the five great nations when you sought them out. It was nearly a month later after you had sent out the portfolio did Shisui’s firm respond. ‘You were the only firm to return interest and extend an offer.’

This was not something Shisui expected to hear. It disheartened him and left a foul taste in his mouth. Surely other firms would have been interested. He hadn’t sent a reply as quickly beforehand. Thinking you would take an opportunity in another country. Most people wanted to leave their home cities; he responded solely on the fact he was too eager in his selection for you. The portfolio, while small, was exceptional. Organized and precise. His stubbornness made him hold off but the business side of him does what’s best for itself.

He had to have you, to see the woman behind the mind. Even if you weren’t the spectacular woman before him, he still would have hired you. He wasn’t discriminatory in that matter, only if you would be beneficial to the firm. He knew from the initial interview that you would be, it was just a bonus that you were drop dead gorgeous.

‘No other company reached out?’ The irritation in his voice was severe and brought blasphemy in his eyes.

The hardened look on his face softens once more as you continue, ‘I was shocked to receive your extension to interview.’

Another unexpected answer. Shisui didn’t expect that the other internships went unanswered, but he never once turned down the free labor hours of an internship. There wasn’t a damn thing that made you unworthy of a position here. Intelligent, well calculated….submissive. You did every thing he threw at you from silly errands he couldn’t be fucked with, to listening to him bitch about Genma’s vacation in the Land of Tea being two weeks.

‘So here I am. Almost the six month review. I was hoping that this recent development would…be a retainer for a full time position…’ the words taper off. Hearing how silly you were.

Scratch my back, I’ll scratch yours was not at the forefront of your mind.

But it was his and, well, the funny thing is. Shisui’s back, is on his cock. That’s exactly the kind of back scratching he was referring to earlier when he asked for you to come up with a minor presentation for him. He figured this one wouldn’t fly over the crows nest, but it had. You didn’t quiet catch his intentions.

He would just have to be more…direct.

A small smile spreads his face, the fact that you were just so bashful with your request. Shisui rounds his desk quickly, his hands at your forearms. Sights sharp with intent. Deep baritone grows soft when he addresses you, ‘consider me impressed.’

You quickly dial in at his hands holding you so, so intimately. ‘Why?’ Is that really all you can manage? Though you didn’t understand, ‘why do I impress you? I did something that someone else should have been doing.’ Your brows pinch.

Shisui doesn’t answer right away, he takes the time to consider you. He thumbs small circles on your left arm, as if he is trying to properly convey the words of adoration without scaring you off. ‘You’re right, I should have someone doing this. I am just impressed you were that person when it should have been someone more experienced in this company.’

‘But…?’ Waiting for it. For the let down of not having a position here.

Shisui runs a hand through his hair, the other still on your left arm, ‘this is the first time I’ve ever thought about extending a full-time position to an intern in awhile. But…from now on, you will not be an intern…’ a pregnant pause makes the air thick and stale for a moment. ‘You’ll be my assistant.’

‘Assistant?’ That wasn’t working with numbers, ‘that’s not…numbers or anything close to it…’

Shisui’s laugh fills his chest and reverberates in his throat stopping at a light hum, the grip on your forearm tightens a little to capture your undivided attention wholly. ‘Do not worry. I never said that you would stop working with numbers. That will still be part of your position here. But, moreover, I want your input on other aspects of this company. Marketing, communication, etc. a more….intimate experience at my side.’

You gawk. ‘How can you consider that from a near bare portfolio. I surely haven’t worked my weight in ryo here, not even close.’

In this moment, you look adorable to Shisui. Exasperated and uncertain. Almost undeserving. ‘You’re forgetting exactly why I chose you for the internship. I knew from the moment I interviewed you that you were a very sharp young lady. My trust in your abilities has grown exponentially these past few months, and hence…this new position for you.’

A soft click of your tongue, it was all coming full circle now. ‘This sounds like a curated position that was just made up.’

Shisui’s lips curl into a devious smile, that slips below subtle smirk. He narrows his eyes a bit, those eyes ever intense and drinking you up like the finest whiskey. That calm and composed side of Shisui is replaced by a commanding and dominant presence. Unholy even.

‘Uchiha-san?’ A sharp exhale as Shisui snakes a hand around her waist.

He brings you flush to his chest, running a hand through your hair. Drags his nose along your jaw and up to your cheek before his lips stop at your ear. Hot and raspy, Shisui’s intentions are more than clear. You notice how tall he really is, just towering over you. How much older he is too.

‘What…are you doing?’ A whispered hiss of astonishment at his direct approach.

‘What do you think I am dong?’ Sweet like honey, his voice is deep. Commanding. Possessive.

‘I’m partial to believe this is not in my job description….’ Your soft breath fans the his cheek as he rakes a hand up the nape of your neck.

‘I never suggested it was….’ The words send shivers down your spine, his thumb traces down your cheekbone. His warm breath smells sweet, you know this is not appropriate. Against policy. And as much as you’d hate to admit it.

You enjoyed it. ‘Then what is this for?’

You graze your nose in return over his cheek, the boldness amuses Shisui. How much did you like this? ‘This is part of the perks that come with your new job. If you haven’t noticed by now… I tend to enjoy your company.’

Well no, you didn’t notice. Not until now, ‘no, how could I when I’m hardly doing as an intern should?’ That was cute.

The small moan from your lips is even more adorable as Shisui dragged his lips down your neck. Delirium filled your head space, this was moving too fast. Before you knew it your tight pencil skirt was shucked to above your hips and you were laid on his desk.

Subservient to his desire, fueled by your own deplorable greed within. You could just let Shisui have his way with you, not that you saw it this way. Sex was currency, was also free and felt fucking good. The part of you that may or may not have fantasized this exact scenario unfolding was in charge now.

Spread out, legs over his shoulders holding his head in a vice squeeze. How did it get far this fast? Nose in your heat, lapping and twirling his tongue over your clit. Fingers curling in the confines of your taut muscles. Muscles that ached for it; were drenched for him. If your knocked a few things off his desk, Shisui would forgive you. This was the reason why he’d drawn you in after hours, the sounds you made were no less than a few doors in range: if anyone was still here after hours. They’d hear and pretend they didn’t the next day.

When his cock stretched you, molded you to him. He reamed a hand around your neck and pressed your back into the keyboard. Every time you came close to coming, he squeezed and stopped thrusting. Making you writhe and submit further to him.

‘..please.’ Your desperate whimper.

‘Please..what?’

Those soft eyes of yours caught his attention, ‘..please let me come Uchiha-san.’

He kissed you sweetly, but fucked you like an office whore as you came all over him. ‘Such a good girl…’ rang your ears every so often as he softly panted out between thrusts. Shisui flipped you to your stomach once you succumbed to his relentless pounding. Wrung his hand in your hair and craned your neck back to expose the delicate flesh. Nipping your pulse point, he sheath himself once more. Slower, needier. On the verge of filling your sweet hole with his genetic markup. Gripping your waist to steady your body, he whispered many things of promise if you accepted his job offer.

His bed, car and money. What on earth had gotten into this man? Shisui couldn’t figure out for himself exactly what he was saying either, but it was all forgotten the split second your salacious whimper and saying you were coming again. Had his hips steam rolling and slamming into you harder. Pumping his thinking length as he coated your insides. Holding your back to his chest as you both moaned out loud.

Surely, this was unprofessional. The entire time you fixed your clothes, you expected him to rescind his decision. That didn’t happen. Not when he fixed his tie, adjusted your skirt and covered you with his coat. Not once did his resolve change as you both walked out the dark office and got out of the elevator. He took you to dinner, paid an extraordinary amount of money for too little food and ushered you home. Opened your door and lead you by the small of your back to your front door and gave you a chaste kiss.

‘See you in the morning, ill be here at 6:30am’ It was fully decided by now that you did have a a full time position now, and he handed you a check for the firsts three months salary, and then some that had your head spinning.

‘This is unnecessary..’ It was money that you’d only ever seen on paper, let alone now held in your hands.

‘Consider it a bonus, and a reward.’ Shisui lifted your chin, and kissed your cheek.

You watched as he waited for you to go inside of your apartment, then he left.

[nullbutler]

Masterpost of Projects

Hi! I'm Null! I make way too much stuff !! Here's a comprehensive list of everything I'm proud enough of to advertise on the front of my blog! It's a lot of kuro stuff!

My COMMISSIONS are OPEN!

BLACK BUTLER : BOOK OF SPIDERS [<- watch here]

A literal season 2 MOVIE. That's right i fucking COMPILED SEASON 2 INTO A FUCKING MOVIE it's a TWO AND A HALF HOUR LONG FUCKING MOVIE. I am in no way an editing professional, but the filler is cut, the gratuitously vile scenes are either done differently or also cut, and Alois and Hannah are portrayed in a kinder light, especially with Alois's backstory being handled a lot more carefully. No original footage is added - it is merely camera tricks and framing.

"You got rid of that Ciel screaming scene and that's like 5 stars for me." -- @warmmilk-n-honey

"Truly proves that less is more." -- @pain-in-the-butler

"An actual digestible version of Season 2." - @mantomhive

2. My Webcomic: The Dead The Damned & The Devil (Read here)

What if Vincent Phantomhive came back from the dead just before his sons were sacrificed? This is a fix-it AU...kind of. Many side characters are integral to this story, like Francis and Madam Red. It's got 8+ chapters, and if you like to watch scared parents protect sad little kids, its a good read. likewise, if you already want to hug vincent, its a good read. likewise, if you want to punch vincnet in the face, it's a good...

VOLUME ONE HAS BEEN COMPLETED!!!

3. My Season 2 Video Essay (black butler season 2 is laughing at you)

watch me scream about the meta of season 2 as an exhausted season 2 fan for about two hours...it's got some original animatics, too!

4. My Youtube + some highlights such as

The Black Butler Actors OVA Abridged

exactly what it says on the tin! a 22 minute long black butler parody following what the hellish production of season 2 was actually like (and also. uh. character trauma??? somehow???)

"Cinder Soul" the angsty End-of-Contract visual novel

Sebastian and Ciel angst hours, in an AU where Ciel has quite literally lost everything. Ominous. Sad.

Season 2 Reanimation project

on indefinite hiatus -- but its still 14 minutes of technically an episode, and the ending is more 'open' than 'cliffhanger.' what if Alois and Ciel got to talk it out when they were trapped in the same body, back in episode 11? Fully originally animated (thsi is probably the largest thing I've ever made hghdfhs)

Collabs w Mel ( @weeb-cheese )

This list will probably get longer but aaa they're so cool!

Pluto video essay!

Drossel video essay!

NOT-KURO VIsual Novel

A light-hearted (?) sapphic visual novel about some ladies who LARP at garden club. On hiatus

5. Ego Te Absolvo

So what if Alois Trancy teamed up with Ash Landers and became an exorcist who killed demons? Would he be happy? Would he be free? This is a really fun fic, i've been co-writing it with @eemoo1o and its aaa!! very cool!! do be warned, it gets...darker...the longer you read it. it is an alois trancy fic after all, even if the initial concept might seem a bit silly

6. RIan Stoker Ask Blog

Don't ask me why i wanted to make this. but he's always open!

I have a number of other smaller projects that you can find by hunting through my youtube and stalking my ao3. I don't mind!! tho some of the older stuff is definitely not as good lmao thanks for reading!!

I also run @blackbutler-heritage-posts and hosted @dadbastianweek2023 !!!

[youredreamingofroo]

For those awaiting an answer on one of my more recent posts, and whether I'll be leaving, here it is. .....Under the cut, as it, in my usual fashion, gets lengthy, you can skip to the end for a TL:DR :)

I'm not going to leave tumblr/simblr, I'll be floating around and still liking people's posts, I'm probably gonna unfollow some people (not my mutuals ofc ilya) just because it's hard to keep up with my dash when I get over 10 notifications every 2 minutes or so especially when if I'm not going to primarily consume Sims 4 content. I'm going to put my mods folder into my external HDD, in order to preserve them ykwim, and I'm going to uninstall TS4, I'll try to make one more sim before the sims 4 gets poofed off my laptop, although as it stands even after freeing up 20 GBs of space, my space went back down to 400 MBs so 😭😭 I will probably be posting variety content, even though I know all my followers are primarily Sims content consumers (some of ya'll do other stuff, but I mean as a whole, my audience tends to be more Sims 4 related), I might play and share some of my Sims 1 content, which is not story oriented, it's just a little gameplay of Roo in the Sims 1 :) I'll also probably post Baldur gate stuff (if I can free up the storage for it LMAO), I'll post witcher content maybe, and plenty of other things, and like I said, I'll continue to float around, and I'll continue to reblog any Sims content I see and enjoy... as well as other things. .... So what about W.A.S? Yea. I dont know, while W.A.S IS supposed to be a fleshed out story, and while I know I AM leaving sims 4 behind, completely limiting what I can and cannot make story-wise (just cuz I don't know how to make scenes and stuff lmao), I will ATTEMPT to make W.A.S content, I will still make and post the Official teaser, and I'll probably introduce the characters myself sometime after the teaser (I'll take screenshots in CAS and just hope my storage doesn't dip TOO low). I may release some of the story in just text form, as I do really want to continue to post about the story. I'll try to come up with something tho, don't worry :)

I may also start getting back into art, I still need some hobby to preoccupy my time that isn't gaming, I will still do blender stuff (since I have a bunch of my Sims' DAEs) and I will maybe make more edits, but regardless, I still enjoy art and Sims 4 kinda consumed the time that I wanted to spend doing art, soooo yeah.

For the unrooleased tag, I have a bunch of sims that I've never posted, as well as renders that I've never posted, and I may, as Sims 4 filler, post those to fill the void that will become my Sims 4 content

and FINALLY. LAST THING I promise :) I know all of ya'll LOVE Roo, and I do want to reinforce the fact that ROO IS NOT A SIMS CHARACTER, I did NOT make him originally from the Sims, if you were at any point worried I would stop posting about him, I will not be, I will continue to share about Roo, probably with a lot less pictures considering I really only used TS4 as a visual assistant for his story, I do have his DAEs, so I can make SOME Roo blender content, albeit limited with Scenes and stuff. Roo is a character that I will continue to be passionate about, I never mentioned this but I LOVE to make Roo in pretty much every game I play (besides Skyrim................ and ofc games where u dont have customization), like Animal Crossing, I made a variant of Roo there, and in Stardew! You get the point, he will always be a prominent figure of my content. I may also bring back some characters I made from TS4, like Nirvana, I LOVE her character and would LOVE to continue to post about her, as well as Roo's family, I love posting about his family members and sharing their own story and what importance they are to Roo.

WOW, okay that was a lot, if you're skipping here for a clear answer, or a sort of TL:DR, here ya go, I don't want to leave tumblr, so I won't, and I won't necessarily leave the Simblr ring, TS4 is going to be uninstalled, but I WILL preserve my TS4 mods in my external HDD, and be on the look out for the last sim I make in TS4 :)

[captain-hen]

hi! do you mind sharing what steps you use to color your gifs? your colorings are always so nice

hi! since i've gotten quite a few people asking about this, i thought i'd do a full tutorial on it! 🥰 i'll go into two aspects—how i color gifs normally, for properly lit/neutrally colored scenes, and how i color when the scenes are unnaturally yellow/red/orange.

fair warning for a lot of images and me rambling way too much under the cut!

we'll start with how i color normally, i'll show you how to achieve something like this:

before we start, a couple of things to keep in mind:

i won't be going into the basics of gifmaking (screencaping, loading your frames in, sharpening, and all that). this is assuming you know the basics of giffing and have an idea of adjustment layers.

i use PS 2020, but you can do this in pretty much any version.

i always do all my editing with my gif converted into a smart object, but you can do this in frame animation too!

the way i'm coloring is quite specific to the way 911 is lit, and while this should work with any other show that has similar lighting, you can't use the same principles for shows that are washed out or have weird filters or really dark lighting.

so, i start off by brightening up my gif. i add an exposure and levels layer for this purpose:

this gives it sufficient brightness, but doesn't adjust it drastically the way some gifmakers like to do. the brightness usually isn't my focus, i'll adjust it if i need to, but i prefer to focus on color correction/enhancement, and so on. this is what my gif looks like now:

i like my gifs to have a LOT of contrast to reduce pixellation and because i think it gives it more clarity and crispness. i also like to them to be vibrant, but not in a way that makes the skin tones of the characters look unnatural. so i start off with adding a selective color layer with the blacks increased, for contrast (i know people usually use levels or curves, but i really prefer selective color in this instance) and a color balance layer to make the hue and tones of the gif cooler.

this is what i end up with:

of course, buck's skin looks way too unnatural. we'll fix this in selective color—i use a LOT of selective color layers just for the skin tone of the characters. i used at least 4 for this gif alone. the majority of your coloring process can take place there, if you're not going for anything fancy.

i'll share the settings i used, but keep in mind this is very subjective to each gif and scene. even if the scenes are very similar, you'll definitely have to make at least some adjustments.

i also added selective color to brighten majentas (for buck's lips and cheeks) and blues (for the background behind him). since there are only a handful of major colors in this scene, i didn't have to do much. but if there were green, yellow and other cooler colors, i would be working on making them look as vibrant as possible.

this was my result:

i decided i wanted my gif to look a little brighter, after all, and i used a brightness/contrast layer. i also decided to darken the reds a tad bit more, and highlight the whites, like so:

to complete it, i added a grey to white gradient map at about 22% opacity, set to soft light, to add a little more contrast. this step is optional, unless you're a stickler like me for the greys and blacks to be darkened lmao.

the finished product:

next, let's move on to color correcting!

there are a lot of layers you can use to color correct, and i'll be using channel mixer for the purposes of the tutorial. it's not too complicated—but in case you want a more detailed explanation into how it works, this tutorial is perfect!

so, this is the scene we'll be working with. 911 has good lighting compared to a lot of shows, but there are a lot of scenes—especially in s1 and in the characters' houses—that are washed way too yellow or red. the characters of color, unfortunately, seem to get the brunt of it. so i'll be showing you how to color correct, while staying true to their skin tones!

this is the gif without any coloring at all:

before brightening the gif, i'm gonna add a channel mixer layer. i'll go straight to the blue channel, and increase the red and green channels slightly.

this is what the gif looks like:

it looks better, but her skin is too majenta. we'll fix this with another channel mixer layer, this time in the red channel. reduce the red slider slightly, like so:

she looks better now! still a little too red, but our next steps will fix that. next, brighten up the gif and add contrast like normal:

of course, now she looks waay too pale. we'll fix this using vibrance:

better, but it's not close enough to her original skin tone for my liking. let's use selective color. i adjusted the reds:

i also adjusted the yellows, greens, cyans and blues; to make the other colors more vibrant. this is the finished gif:

if you want the gif to look brighter—i'm aware that the way i've done it gives it minimal brightness—you can add a brightness contrast layer, while upping both the brightness and contrast sliders. this should brighten up your gif, while keeping hen's skin tone as dark as it should be.

i really hope this tutorial helps! 💞 let me know if you have any questions!

[appelsiinilight]

Finally got around to binging Centaurworld season 2;

so he like literally just started beef with his own damn self for no reason at all, like LITERALLY ASDFGHJKASDFGH, FUNNIEST tragic villain backstory of ALL time

like the whole thing with the elk half was indeed very fucked, but he Literally Just Decided To Do That To Himself For No Reason, like you can’t even do the whole “sure [villain] did bad things, but they were traumatized by [someone more evil]!” thing ‘cause HE DID THATTTTT

and the split itself took place IMMEDIATELY after he first cut off his antlers which the crush he did it for FLIRTED WITH HIM ABOUT LIKING THEMMMMM

and a few scenes later HE HIMSELF goes “hey that was kinda a very drastic and entirely unnecessary measure”

also the fact that he was a dickhead before any sort of sad tragic backstory at all occurred ASDFGHJKASDFGHJK it may be tempting to slip into the line of thought that he split into the good (elk) and the bad (guy) personalities of the og elktaur, since the elk ends up such a poor little mewmew, but i think it is pretty clear textually that they were exactly the same at the start, and whichever one ended up with the human body would’ve doubled down on the oh-god-what-the-fuck personality trait sdfghjkldfghjk

also, in the context of the show, it kinda looks a lot like the general strove to fuck over the elk not so much out of self-loathing or anything even subtextually like that, but because he (all of him - the elktaur, and the people he split into) is just not into treating people well, TO THE DEGREE that even a person who used to be His Actual Self stopped mattering to the him that had the upper hand and to whom that person’s existence was inconvenient

edit: ok i browsed the tag a little and i’m seeing some fantasy racism angst ascribed to the elktaur, and like, yeah, the show did insert a few “elktaur experiences a microaggression” moments, BUT, ASDFGHJKL, this is one of those “fantasy racism catastrophically fails as a racism metaphor” moments because unlike in real life, citizens of the Centaurworld do act fucking insane all the time compared to humans. Like, that’s the premise of the show: Normal Horse Enters Fucking Insane World. You can’t just pull a “but acting like centaurs are different is basically bigotry and it drove the elktaur into the deepest pits of self-loathing :)” 9/10ths into the “look at the fucking insane creatures” show ASDFGHJKASDFGHJK

like i’m with the humans of the Centaurworld flashbacks on this one, if I existed in that universe I wouldn’t touch the in-universe centaurworld with a 10 foot pole because I barely suffered through watching these characters. HORSE barely suffered through interacting with them through season 1!!!

Textually, elktaur just acts weirdly human compared to Literally Every Single Other Centaur ASDFGHJKASDFGHJ

basically it does not appear that Centaurworld (the show) executed any real themes, at least where the elktaur and his iterations are concerned, but that’s not a criticism (unless the writers did actually try to do some themes and fucked up so bad, in which case, LMAO) - the story doesn’t have to have them to be very fun. having a very fucked up guy just start shit for no thematically cohesive reason is still a very fun story to experience asdfghjksdfghj

[hydrangeyes]

Tobirama x Seme Male reader

So if you don't know, Yes this already existed, my old account was deleted (accident but I can tell I won't be getting it back), and am reposting my old x male reader works!

I don't know if I saved all of them but here is one that was saved to my AO3 account.

Edit: So shuffling through my docs It's been brought to my attention that wattpad (who I use as backup) Cut a lot of my fics in half??? anyway I'll be trying to fix that also

------------------------------------------------

Requested by bunglol

This is def Au piece where those who were revived, stayed. Idk that whole story arc just flew passed me lmao. This ended up longer than expected lol, uhhh oops?

Edited: *kicks door open* SUP I HAVE NO EXCUSE ONCE AGAIN I BECAME ADDICTED TO NU:CARNIVAL (like h scenes aside I really do like the combat aspect and am curious on where the story is going)

ANYWAY

IT'S SMUT SORTS, MAINLY FOREPLAY

If I remember right there is fingering and probably eating him out

--------------

As to be expected his mission went well. A few hiccups with a couple of rogues but nothing he couldn't handle. Tobirama jumps rooftop to rooftop away from the hokage's tower, now free to go home after submitting his report.

The only thing nagging him was the fact he hadn't received a welcome back tackle from his....his... If anyone were to see him they'd see a soft blush on his cheek. Thoughts of his loud and energetic pup eased the lasting tension in his muscles and warmed up.

N/N inuzuka, A roguishly handsome man who front he moment they meet, made it a habit to take his entire attention. Knowingly or not. At first it was annoying how the cheery male would constantly try to drag him into mundane conversations and bring him furs from animals he hunted.

Embarrassing really, as Tobirama caught on quickly to what he was doing. And felt he was far too old to be courted by someone so young. N/n being in his early 30's but still, Tobirama felt dying and now back again was enough to give him the years of two old (So what if he was forever 34).

Anyway- N/n started this whole thing when he was just 24! Tobirama let out a bemused sigh as he slowed getting to his secluded home.

And yet, N/n got what he wanted. Tobirama fully and happily wrapped around his fingers. And given that outside of solo missions they weren't together , It felt weird to not have N/n bombard his space now that he was back.

Landing on the porch, Tobirama listened as he unlocked the front door (My how the future has advanced was a thought that kept passing his mind).

'He must have taken up a mission while I was out. Odd how he hasn't mentioned that in his last letter.' Stepping in and closing the door behind him Tobirama slips out his sandals just in time to be suddenly yanked further in.

N/n lets out a gruff whine pulling Tobirama close to sniff and run his hands over his form. Looking for any injuries or aches, ignoring Tobirama's sputtering and seeing there was no harm, he lifts the man up. Effortlessly placing him over his shoulders to carry, running a hand up and down the back of his thigh.

"I know I have been gone for some days, but really n/n! Put me down, what is going on with you!" The silver-haired man yelps lightly smacking n/n's back.

Smack

"Ahh! Ngh n-n/n?~" Tobirama moans out in wonder, a N/n gives him a firm slap on his ass, gripping and massaging the cheek afterward. The wolf huffs and tosses him onto the bed, tobirama blinks as he's being tossed onto the bed.

He watches as N/n eyes him from above, face flushed and fangs bared. N/n's eyes were hooded and dark with hunger, loose pants tented enough that there was no point hiding it.

"You were gone for too long tobi~" N/n purrs out finally, his voice was raspy and a growl trailed just after the words, sending shivers down tobirama's spine.

Oh. He could already imagine he will be out of commission for the rest of the week. His legs already trembling and spreading to allow N/n in.

N/n hums softly pressing tobirama down onto his back. "Of course, if you're sore or tired from your mission-"

"Fuck me."

And with that, the last of N/n's restraint snapped. Claws greedily tore and tossed off the clothes on tobirama, leaning down to eagerly lock and bite at the man's neck and chest.

"N/n! Ah- mm those were-" Rama (fuck it typing this instead of his full name) starts dispite his hands running through N/ns' hair to tug him closer.

"I don't care. We'll buy new ones." N/n growls tilting his head to get a look at the marks he left on the pale neck, before continuing on down.

Semi distracted with trying to mark every spot his mouth could reach, N/n uses his left hand to nudge rama's left leg up and over his shoulder; his right spreading the other.

Rama, having been biting his lips to cover up and muffle his raspy moans, hisses in embarrassment at being so thoroughly exposed. His own hands trying to come down to cover his twitching and flush cock. One glare from N/n stopped him in his tracks.

"N-N/n, please." He keens impatient and is already on edge. And well, seeing his bites litter his mates' chest and stomach, N/n decides to move on (he'll come back to the marking during the second round anyway).

Chuckling N/n gives his mate what he wants being a bit sadistic in taking his time in grabbing lube. Slicking up his fingers and Rama's greedy hole, he wastes no time in pressing and then thrusting two fingers into it.

Focusing on Rama's whimpers and desperate moans, N/n curled his fingers to brush and hit Rama's prostate. Cock twitching in his pants feeling the greedy hole tighten and suck his fingers in. Not able to help himself, N/n scouts up to flick his tongue against the rim, pumping his fingers faster and deeper.

"N-N/N!!!" Rama shouts arching his back and throwing his left leg over n/n's shoulder to try and press him closer. N/n's fingers and tongue overwhelmed him to the point of trembling and rolling his eyes to the back of his head.

Rama's shudders as he feels the large amount of precum he was leaking join the mess N/n was making of his hole. "P-please~" Rama sobs out, reaching to tug his hair for his attention. With a groan, N/n pulls out and back licking his lips eyes hooded.

"Sorry~ You're hole is just so cute and tasty-" cutting him off Rama yanked him up into a messy deep kiss, a trembling hand sliding down to grasp and pump N/n's thick cock.

Pulling back a little Rama stares darkly into N/n's eyes, he pants out. "If you don't fuck me right now pup I will through you down and fuck myself on your knot myself."

--------------------------------------------------------

Edit Nov.8.2023: Writing smut is so funny to me tbh

[rollercoasterwords]

hello rae! atwmd has been absolutely eating lately and i'm very excited for the next chapterrr also i was wondering if there are any deleted scenes/bits from the previous chapters you'd wanna share with us? maybe a line that got cut but you liked the wording a lot ? i love learning about writer's editing processes plus would be fun to see any snippets you may have floating around :~)

hi thank u!! responding 2 this a bit late lol sorry but. i don't have any like actually-written scenes that i cut bc normally if i'm writing a scene & realize it isn't gonna work i stop pretty quickly & usually just delete the few sentences etc...also usually i've got everything shifting around in my head like a puzzle til it clicks before i write so. generally speaking i just am not cutting things after writing them...however! i did have one specific scene that i was planning to write in atwmd which didn't end up working out (got 2 the scene & felt like i was hitting a mental wall bc i couldn't make it fit into the plot) so i can like. share that i suppose lol i'll put it under a cut:

so originally around like...ch 17 i think? like after they destroy the diadem when they're trying 2 figure out what the next horcrux is & destroy it, i really wanted 2 write like. a scene where, for some reason, sirius has 2 go undercover pretending 2 be a werewolf & in doing so encounters like a well-meaning rich guy who essentially parallels what he was like w remus in the early parts of the fic 2 like...have this moment of growth where sirius realizes what that dynamic was like for remus & why it was fucked up etc. so i was like uhhh how can that happen...maybe there can be some fun fancy party where rich people bring creatures as escorts & sirius wears a glamour or takes polyjuice from a werewolf's hair...also love in werewolf fics when like. character a wears character b's clothes 2 smell like them & thought that would be fun lmao so i was like what if sirius also wears remus's shirt or something so he smells more like a werewolf...the sexual tension of it all...

so anyway i was like i need this party-undercover-fake-werewolf scene 2 somehow connect from where the fic is at (just destroyed diadem) to the lestrange crypt horcrux part, bc i already knew what i wanted 2 do w the crypt etc. so i was like maybe somehow this party is how they get to rabastan lestrange?? but it didn't end up working out bc it just felt too similar to the whole original mission remus was on w malfoy so it just felt repetitive, and i couldn't figure out how 2 make it logically connect to the crypt in a way that felt believable...and then i had the idea of having rabastan hunt magical creatures & i was like this fits so much better so i went with that instead! rip sirius undercover-fake-werewolf scene...4ever in my heart <3

[thee-morrigan]

now that I've had a couple of days to go through SEVERAL stages of mental illness about book 3, I have…Some Thoughts. about the book in general and specifically about N's route, as so far that's the only one in which I've gone through most (if not all) of the interaction variations (yes, I have approximately 83253 tabs open rn. I told y'all I'm being very unwell about this). I've played through M's route several times so far too, but there were fewer standout "wait, what?" moments for me in that route tbh 🥴

below the cut: the peer review nobody asked for! (and my sincerest apologies lmao)

I really need Mishka to hire professional copy editors for these books, y'all. There are grammar/syntax errors that just. shouldn't be there. (and I don't even mean the nitpicky ones that I'm super anal about! I mean ones like using 'stationary' when you mean 'stationery'.)

somewhat related to the above bullet, I hope the testing period for book 4 is a lot longer than it was for book 3. there are some inconsistencies in the narrative that I suspect would have been caught if there'd been more time between the beta testing and the book being sent to HG.

for example, if you trigger the sex scene options in N's combat route, there is at least one errant reference to the feel of denim when like. you're both in workout clothes (and there is significant time spent describing both N's and the MC's outfits!). ALSO, when you go back inside for the debriefing with UB, F & M tease N about their jeans being unzipped when, again: there were no jeans or zippers involved. It's a funny scene after the equivalent research options, but it makes no sense post-combat ones without editing for attire differences.

while I'm thinking about the research scene on N's route, the fact that the MC can confess their love and N flat out says NOTHING in response??? just immediately jumps to gettin' busy despite the MC explicitly asking them to say something in response??? what will probably be Holland's canon route is fine, because the combat path has a "scared by own feelings" choice and you know homegirl immediately tried to yeet herself out of that potential conversation bc they've been dating for all of 30 seconds at this point. BUT knowing that that path was fine bc it happened to fit my OC honestly just made me more annoyed for anyone playing with a different/more emotionally mature/open detective. because going through the "i love you" options in the research scene especially were disappointing.

again, related to the above, the narrative inconsistencies (and the bulky plot) made the pacing often feel inconsistent. there were so many moving pieces and story beats that a lot of scenes felt either rushed (without seeming like that pace was tonally/narratively appropriate) or unnecessarily truncated. I also felt like there were a lot of points of abrupt info-dumping that was clearly meant to give background info on UB/other characters/plotpoints but ended up feeling inorganic/unnatural in terms of actual relationship-building. or, alternatively, like it was meant to build to a resolution point later in the book that just never happened.

for example: the whole post-Unit Victor scene where your LI shares some of their past with you. It didn't feel quite as abrupt/odd in my M route playthroughs, but the flow was JARRING for me in N's. And the abrupt end to that scene is never revisited. like, I understand the conversation maybe not coming up again, but for neither of them to even linger on what were presumably heavy emotional topics or think about it again at what could have been relevant points throughout the book seemed to dilute what I assume was meant to be an important scene.

speaking of things that are basically not revisited when they really should be, if N's overprotectiveness is going to continue to be a defining trait and the MC can continue to be explicitly bothered by it, I am begging for book 4 to let them have an uninterrupted, private conversation about it - particularly after the whole "I don't know how this is going to work" scene after the auction. because if this is how it already is and there are 4 more books, their relationship is going to be so (much more) unhealthy.

a more positive note! I did think it was ~interesting to see the juxtaposition of N's constant over-the-top "romantic gestures/sentiments" schtick against the responses you can get when you invite them to dinner but choose either the "you don't have to go if you would be uncomfortable" or "I'll call it off if you're not feeling it" option. with the former, N's response is that relationships are doing things for the other person/doing things they want to do, and they seem genuinely baffled when the detective immediately disagrees. with the latter, they seem equally surprised at the detective's willingness to ditch dinner for them. it's a brief thing, but both of their potential responses give the impression that N's perception of those statements is disproportionate to their actual significance. I mean. it's a dinner party that the detective almost forgot about entirely. clearly they don't give a shit about rescheduling/going alone. moreover, towards the end of the book, N explicitly worries about not "being enough" for the MC. for whatever reason, N clearly seems to think they're like, constantly on the verge of losing the detective in a different way than they worry about losing them to the neverending string of external threats, and I do hope it's meant to be the foreshadowing I think it is.