#Forever is honestly such an interesting character and i am so excited to see how this effects him even beyond the ship

[demondank]

Philever is not dead, just different ( i hope...)

I have so many thoughts about Philever after the GuapoDuo marriage and honestly? I don’t think it’s as dead as people believe, is it changed and is the dynamic different? 100% but I don’t think that’s necessarily a bad thing. Like to begin with q!Forevers obsession towards q!Philza wasn’t healthy, like before the wedding (especially in the last few interactions) q!Forever was either:

1) actively trying to gaslight Philza into believing that he is or at least was Brunim 

OR

2) was so delusional that he genuinely thought they were the same person

Both are terrible foundations to build a relationship on. If Philever ever became canon with its dynamic before the wedding, I honestly couldn’t see that ever being a healthy relationship. Was it kinda cute watching Forever be so helplessly in love? Definitely, but it was also kind of just sad. Now that the ship (as it stood) has been so thoroughly destroyed I see it as an opportunity for q!Forever and q!Phil to get to know each other as people and not... whatever they were before (definitely not themselves that’s for sure). 

The wedding to many may seem like the absolute end of the ship, but I think it’s just the end of the first chapter. How we saw Forever treating Phil during his confession was unlike anything we had seen before, it was like Forever was actually seeing Phil and not Brunim. It was genuinely the first bit of clarity we had seen from Forever in regards to Phil in a long time, he was actually listening to was he said (unfortunately what Phil had to say may not have been the nicest for him but anyway), he complimented something about Phil something completely independent from Brunim and even the LOVE shirt had Phils face NOT Brunims. Like come on this is new stuff guys this is Forever appreciating Phil as Phil and not just Brunim 2.0.

q!Phil from the start of their interactions found q!Forever amusing and seems to enjoy having him around as much as he jokes, he admires him as a person and takes notice of his dedication (not just in reguards to his wooing of Philza but also how dedicated he is to the eggs and the server as a whole). There is a mutual respect that has been unable to flourish into a genuine connection and friendship between the cubes because Forever never allowed Philza to get off the defensive (Like how can genuine connection bloom between them when Forever was constantly trying to manipulate and misconstrue Philzas words and actions into anything romantic?). Now that Forever has had his delusions shattered and gained a sense of self-respect (hopefully) there is potential for them to rebuild in a healthier way.

Do I think the cubes will ever actually get together? Not really no, But I am also genuinely surprised with how much PhilZa has been opening up to more roleplay opportunities, who knows maybe romance could be on the table down the track, consequently I wouldn’t be surprised if something happened between them eventually (perhaps something similar to the McYum date?). If we follow what Quackity has been saying about the QSMP its barely started, q!Forever and q!Philza will have plenty of time to grow together and grow closer once again. Plus with how loyal q!Forever is I doubt he will be able to just drop Phil altogether realistically.

Have faith my fellow delusional shippers we have a long ride to go and I honestly am really excited to see where this goes from here.

[stormywitcher]

percy jackson and the olympians has done it. disney, has done it. rick riordan has DONE IT!

the show is so good. i honestly so far can’t fault it, there is nothing i didn’t enjoy. it’s almost perfectly book accurate, the vibe is just right and i absolutely love all the casting. i know there will be people who disagree with me, but i do not give a monkeys. i actually love it.

percy jackson is extremely special to me. it was the first proper full blown autistic special interest i have ever had. i picked up the books when i was 11 (i am now 22) and they have got me through some rough times (including rn with chronic illness) i have a literal trident tattoo on my arm ffs i’m a die hard fan forever.

so to have something i am so incredibly fond of, redeemed from the awful movies, and made into a visually stunning , well thought out, book accurate adaptation, is literally one of the highlights of my life.

so here are some of my more specific thoughts on the first two episodes:

•PERCY! let’s start here. my gods, walker is PERFECT! he has absolutely made this show for me. you can tell how much work he put into understanding percy and making him EVEN BETTER in my opinion than book percy (no shade to book percy, still love him) it’s the moments of vulnerability that he’s worked into it, the genuine anguish, the grief. but also he’s got the humour DOWN! the little comments and one liners were so well delivered, along with his expressions and the way we can see how percy is going to develop. i will never get over his little dancing, and stroking the gecko. that was top tier for me. absolute perfection.

•ANNABETH MY BABE MY LOVE MY WISE GIRL. oh my, leah absolutely EMBODIES her. it’s the little eyebrow quirks, the slightly harsh but kind intonation, it’s so so annabeth. there was so much unnecessary backlash over this casting (cough cough, you can guess why) and it’s total bull, because it doesn’t matter and leah knows that character inside out and it shows. we didn’t get lots of annabeth yet, but i am BEYOND excited to see more and see how percy and annabeths relationship develops!

•GROVER GROVER GROVER what an absolute cutie! absolutely loved his delivery, especially the “i’m 24” line like that ENDED ME. aryan has this in the bag, and i love how he’s kinda sheepish, but still brave, and brings a softness to the character. his comedic timing is everything.

•casting in general i love. Mr D was great, especially with the whole “son” thing. that was illegally funny. love chiron, love luke, and love clarisse. the vibes are all there.

•the writing felt good too! nothing felt too scripted to me, it felt like it flowed and they included a lot of book lines which i loved!

•the visuals were awesome! i loved the CGi, especially for the minotaur and chiron! it wasn’t jarring and you can tell they put the work in to not make it look tacky! i loved how the camp was designed, ESPECIALLY THE CABINS! i always struggled to picture the cabins, so i was actually so impressed with them!

you can tell rick and becky had such a big part in this, it’s really really beautiful and my heart is so full rn. i cannot wait for the rest of this season, i am overjoyed and i hope so much that we get more seasons because this deserves it.

[aihoshiino]

chapter 135 thoughts

Akasaka seems to have heard me bitching about other characters not getting involved last week because pretty much this entire chapter is focused on outsider perspectives on the RubyKana conflict, which I actually really appreciate. Not knowing how everyone else was responding to this felt really weird and while I ultimately am glad in hindsight Akasaka used the last chapter to focus exclusively on Ruby and her feelings about Ai, it did still feel really weird in the moment. And there's still no Miyako… girl where did you go…!!!

It's also really nice to get a bit of Aqua and Gotanda time, too — I feel like it's been forever since we've had any time focusing on that relationship and it's one of my quiet favourites in the series so revisiting it now was a nice surprise. We're still pretty locked out of Aqua's head but I feel like his dialogue here speaks for itself without us needing to peek in there. And whether or not he means to, I think Aqua says something really, really revealing here about how he's been dealing — or abjectly failing to deal — with Ai's death.

A running thread through OnK that Ruby is finally starting to come around from is the way the twins have both struggled with their idolization and objectification of Ai and ultimately failed to treat her like a human being. Here, Aqua doubles down on that dehumanization, rejecting the idea of Ai ever having complicated emotions about any of the things that happened to her. He flattens her into a caricature of herself, carefree and avoidant and specifically says that he personally never saw Ai crying. Not even once.

Except… of course he did. Because Ai cried as she told the twins that she loved them as she was dying. The anime even takes this a step further by having Ai break down into sobs during this moment and having her tears literally fall onto Aqua's face as he gazes into her eyes. In denying the existence of these tears, Aqua is also to some degree, erasing those words of pure love that Ai poured out with her last breaths. It feels like a confirmation of something I've been suspecting for a while: that in his fucked up attempts to 'grant her wish' Aqua is even willing to desecrate and erase the real Ai.

In a lot of ways, Aqua is deeply stunted in comparison to Ruby. Honestly I kind of get the feeling that Aqua… doesn't want to humanize Ai? Not out of cruelty but out of seemingly necessarily self defense; if Aqua lets himself love his mom as a human person, if he lets himself love her properly and with empathy then he will necessarily have to finally mourn and grieve for her as a human being and I think that would be the start of breaking him.

What's exciting about this talk as well is that it sets up Aqua and Ruby to be in opposition on something extremely central to the movie arc: Ai herself. This sets up the potential for them to come into conflict and maybe even for Ruby to really lay into him about the exploitative way 15YL is making use of Ai's image.

Final note before I move on: whether this was intended or not, I can't help but see a lot of parallels between Aqua's insistence that Ai would never cry over her treatment in B-Komachi and Nino's rant at the end of 45510 in which she reacts with revulsion at the idea of Ai wanting to connect with them. Aqua/Nino parallels aren't what I was expecting for Christmas but the implications are pretty (discord eyes emoji)

Gotanda's response is interesting, too. He claims that he wrote the script by 'listing the events that actually happened' when we know for a fact that there is a huge amount of dramatization and fictionalization at play just out of the necessity of recreating the events in the life of a person no longer here to give testimony. But he also betrays something here: his own lack of real care towards Ai herself. He dismisses the idea that it's worth trying to understand her feelings after her passing and admits that he isn't really making the movie out of empathy but out of a sense of wanting to capture something he failed to before. This movie is his revenge.

And like… fuck, man. It's just so miserable. There has always been this really ghoulish undercurrent to the entire idea of the Movie Arc, of digging up Ai's corpse again, slicing up her private and most personal self and her painful history that caused her so much shame and dressing it up into something pretty and consumable for the public to salivate over. Even in death, Ai can't rest in peace. Even in death, nobody can just leave her be. She has to be bought and sold and swapped and traded until all the value has been wrung out of her. Nobody making this movie really cares about understanding the real Ai at this point, apart from Ruby; not even the director who wants to be able to film her.

That said. man. the scene that followed was pretty sweet. The idea that Gotanda pulled Aqua into his project not just to give Kana a bit of a wake up call but because he was actually looking out for her and genuinely wanted her to have some friends is a really lovely idea and his sense of relief in seeing her having found a place in B-Komachi was also really good. In a lot of ways, the second generation of B-Komachi may be echoing the mistakes of their predecessors but they're also learning to correct them.

kana's face when she takes a bite out of ruby's parfait is like the hardest i've laughed all week btw god bless mengo yokoyari

The Gillian Cut of Gotanda talking so warmly about RubyKana's friendship to the two girls still being cold with each other is framed as a joke but I do think it's supposed to be read as a reassuring moment for the audience. While Aqua puts forth that his rose-tinted idea of fights making friendships stronger only happens in fiction… Oshi no Ko is fiction. Literally the very first words of the story are that verbatim and it constantly uses in-universe fiction as metatexual commentary on its own nature as a story. More than a joke, this feels like a sort of reassuring pat on the back for the reader that the girls will emerge from this rough spot stronger than before.

Aqua's sense of trust for both Kana and Ruby is really sweet, too. They're two of the people he cares about the most in the world — often to the point of him not being able to trust them, out of fear of the supposed repercussions — but here, he not only steps back to let them handle things themselves but reassures Gotanda that he can do the same. Aqua has been pretty cruel to both these girls in a lot of ways over the series so it was nice to see him express some warmth.

And that's the final chapter of this year…! Jesus I can't believe I only got back into the series back in April lol I really feel like I've been following the weekly chapters for longer. Admittedly, I'm starting to get really fatigued with the Movie Arc with how long it's been going but I'm hoping that we'll start to see some more progress on it when we return in 2024 and that Kamiki will do. Something maybe. can you even imagine.

[greaterspawnislands]

honestly no matter how the server plays out im just excited that phil’s character has actual adversaries this time. like on dsmp he relegated himself to a support character to techno + wilbur, which yknow. was fine. kind of a bummer but fine. and then on osmp he had his evil arc going on, but no one was really rising up against him on that so he didn’t have an incentive to keep pushing that character as much

so i absolutely am adoring the fact that not only does quackity have beef with him because of chayanne and tallulah, but now forever also feels scorned by him and they both want to put him in jail. i am so damn excited to have phil actually centered in a conflict that could actually be something interesting if it continues to way they were talking yesterday. really looking forward to seeing where it goes

[wifegideonnav]

should i read homestuck. like i feel it would be interesting so i could see what yall are talking about in regards to tlt but is homestuck actually good

"is homestuck good" - the greatest thread in the history of forums, locked by a moderator after 8129 pages of heated debate,

no but seriously, it highkey depends on 1. your definition of good and 2. your tolerance for stupid bullshit. as someone who read tlt and then hs, i'd say that being a fan of the chaotic aspect of tlt is a good predictor of being able to hang in with homestuck.

readmore because this. um. got long. the tl;dr is: i like homestuck a lot and i am glad i read it. i can't tell you if you should read it bc idk your tastes, but there is a lot to like and enjoy about it.

the official pitch for homestuck is something like "4 kids play a game and then a bunch of other shit happens." here's my pitch based on what the core of the story is to me:

several groups of characters across time, space, and reality are brought together in order to succeed at creating a new universe after their own are destroyed. this takes the form of a game, which is called sburb (by the humans) and sgrub (by the trolls). the characters must contend with an eternal battle against good and evil in which they are the deciding factor, and level up while following personalized quests. at its heart, homestuck is about relationships of every sort and how they shape us, growing up and the associated grief and loss, coming into ones identity and choosing who to be, predestination and fate, and stories themselves. it gets very meta at times, and the characters are semi to fully aware that they're characters, and attempt to subvert or escape that. it's got hordes of fleshed out, compelling characters, one of which will almost certainly glom onto you for the rest of your life, real emotion, extremely funny jokes, smart and exciting plotting, and some very cool moments. it more or less invented an entire new genre/medium, and plays with medium in a very cool way.

it is also clunky, hard to get into, and way too convoluted. you will never fully understand what's happening. there are tons of characters whose stories you will follow whom you simply do not care about. there are too many characters. it was written by an edgelord in 2009 so there's some unsavory humor and character writing. it's so fucking long. the ending kinda sucks because the fandom was so toxic that hussie simply wanted it over with. the fandom still kinda sucks tbh. so many people have wrong opinions about it. it requires a very specific lens to approach and understand it. i still dont understand what happened with that fucking puppet someone explain it to me.

overall, i'd say that if you think you want to read it, give it a shot. i have a complicated relationship with it but at the end of the day, i genuinely love the story and the characters and i know they will be with me forever. it certainly enhanced my understanding of tlt, and getting to read more of tamsyn's writing was such a bonus (even though her taste in pairings is. not the same as my own). and like honestly. it's just fun. even when you're going "wait what the fuck just happened" you're having fun. it's really goddamn funny too. it WILL change the way you speak and also think about romance forever.

the best way to read it is to have an experienced reader guide you, but if you or other people don't know anyone like that, here are my basic tips:

i think most people know this already, but download the unofficial homestuck collection. just do it. it's like 4 gigs and it's infinitely better than trying to read on the broken website, and it's even ad free. it can also be modded - for instance ik there's a slur replacer mod (lmao) if you don't want to read those

act 1 sucks to read. you're like what the fuck is this, THIS is homestuck?? the beginning is radically different from how it ends up, so just hang in there. for me, it really picked up somewhere in act 3. just focus on the silly fun the characters are having and you'll be good

things you should actually try to follow in the early acts: the concept of a sylladex existing (the various fetch modi are only there for jokes and eventually just kinda stop being a thing), where all the copies of the game are, what each kid's relationship with their guardian is like, the mechanics of the game and the lore behind it, including classpects and quests

things you do not have to waste brain space on: anything about how the totems work, what the various machines are, what the levels are, basically any of the jokes that would be funny to hussie's original intended audience of software engineers and rpg gamers. oh and the intermission with the midnight crew and the felt, just know that those are guys that exist and you'll be good.

and the biggest tip i have is just. go with it. suspend your disbelief. a lot of the worldbuilding doesn't really make sense, but it would be a worse story if it did. when the time shit and ectobiology come into play, literally just go ok got it and keep going, don't think too hard.

so yeah i don't even know if any of this is useful but i hope it helps you decide. and if you or anyone else have follow up questions send em!

[choicesficwriterscreations]

December Creator of the Month: Oh-So-Youre-a-Nerd

Each month, CFWC highlights one of our talented fanfic writers or artists, and this month’s creator of the month is @oh-so-youre-a-nerd . We're very excited because Ascindio is our very first artist to be highlighted! We hope you will enjoy learning more about them and their work below! The writer is selected at random. More info can be found on the navigation page.

Quick Links:

Tumblr Blog Instagram

How do you want to be known on Tumblr? 

Ascindio 

More below...

1- When did you start playing Choices? What was the first book you played? 

I started playing in 2016, I can't remember if I read Endless Summer or Rules of Engagement first, but I ended up deleting the app after like 2 weeks cause I couldn't stop buying diamonds 😅🤦

I re-downloaded it about, ohh idk 2 years ago?

2- When and why did you join Choices fandom?

I joined the Fandom specifically on Tumblr and specifically for It Lives Within, which happened to come out right after I read the first two books 

3- How did you pick your blog name? 

I always try to seem cool and mysterious when I meet people irl, and then as soon as I open my mouth, I ruin it with some niche trivia or something, and they say,  “Oh, so you're a nerd.” 😂 Can't tell you how many times this exact phrase has been uttered to me. 

4- Pull up the first post in your archive, and tell us about it!  

This is the first Choices related post I made 😂 I was just thinking about the concept of what if characters make terrible decisions cause they're controlled by a player who is out of diamonds lol I was going to do a whole series of them (next was going to be lotr “fly on eagles to mordor?” *30 diamonds* or “simply walk”) but got lazy lol

5- Do you write fanfiction, create fan art, or are you one of those really gifted people who do both? 

Only art. God, I  WISH  I wrote too. I've thought about trying cause I have so many ideas floating around in my head, but at the end of the day, I'd rather spend my free time drawing. 

6- How long have you been creating for Choices and for any other fandoms?

For Choices, since early 2022

For other fandoms, since well, forever, but I only started posting around 2017/18

7- What is your favorite Choices book, and what is your favorite Choices book to create for?

Favorite Choices book is probably It Lives in the Woods. All of the characters were so interesting, I never got bored reading it, and it had an incredible twist that made sense but I still didn't see coming. 

Favorite to create for is probably Blades of Light and Shadow though because I am such a sucker for the fantasy aesthetic.

8- Share your first Choices fanfic or fan art that you posted with us. Do you still like it, or would you change it if you were creating it today?.

This isn't the first Choices art I made, but it IS the first I actually shared

And honestly, I DO still like it because I still remember the way I felt absolutely POSSESSED while drawing it (I hadn't drawn anything for *months*). I would definitely change the background, though. Those trees look like shit, and they're not even the correct type for the kind of forest they're in. 

9- What is your favorite piece of fiction or art that you created? 

My favorite Choices art I've done is probably this piece. 

10- Do you have a fic/art that you didn’t expect to be well received, but it was? What about one you expected to do well but found it could use a little more love?

I definitely didn't expect this one to do well at all as it was so hastily drawn

And I was sad this piece didn't get more love, it was such a dope scene and I was so excited about how the sword turned out

11- If you could only draw one style or type of art for the rest of your life, what would it be and why? 

I'm not sure if I'm interpreting the question right, but if I had to pick like a specific type of art, it would be digital, and I would want to do fan art. I have a hard time painting anything that I don't already have a deep connection with (so original art with no story behind it is usually a chore for me), and digital art is just so incredibly convenient and not messy and so so versatile. 

12 - Do you ever recognize yourself in any of your MCs or in your writing?

Because I use fiction as a way to safely process trauma/ grief/ other big emotions, each MC I make has a small part of me, whichever part I feel the need to explore at the time.

There's an amazing quote by Patrick Rothfuss that I feel explains it perfectly. 

It's from Wise Man's Fear

“These folk knew all about death. They killed their own livestock. They died from fevers, falls, or broken bones gone sour. Death was like an unpleasant neighbor. You didn’t talk about him for fear he might hear you and decide to pay a visit.

Except for stories, of course. Tales of poisoned kings and duels and old wars were fine. They dressed death in foreign clothes and sent him far from your door. A chimney fire or the croup cough were terrifying. But Gibea’s trial or the siege of Enfast, those were different. They were like prayers, like charms muttered late at night when you were walking alone in the dark. Stories were like ha’penny amulets you bought from a peddler, just in case.”

13 - What element of writing/art do you struggle with most?

I have a very difficult time making the poses seem natural and flowing. My all time favorite art is Baroque/Renaissance style and how fluid the poses are, how soft the skin looks, how delicately it's all done. Obviously, I will always have my own style, but those are things that I so want to incorporate but never seem to get quite right, and it drives me crazy 😂

14 - Do you have any neglected work you really want to finish?

Not really. I mean, I have a ton of unfinished work, but as soon as the window of inspiration passes, I just can't get myself to care enough about it to finish it (insert Jake the Dog, “now it's gone, and I don't care about it anymore!” )

15 - If someone you know in real life (who isn’t involved in fandoms) asked to see your work, would you let them? If yes, what would you show them first? 

I would, and have.  I typically show them whatever most rendered recent picture from my Instagram because I don't post any nsfw there and usually try to post only my prettier work for this specific reason haha. (As opposed to here, I post everything here, ain't NO ONE from real life invited to see my tumblr 😂)

16 - Are there any writers (published authors and/or fanfic writers) who influenced your writing or art? Are there any artists that influence you?

Writers: Brandon Sanderson, for sure. He's the reason I got back into art back in 2017 ish. His stories are just so emotional they push me to create. Same with @saibug1022, there is always at least one scene from every story he shares that I desperately want to draw to try to capture the emotions. 

Artists: God, sooo many, here are just like my top 3 favorites and their instagrams.

Audra Auclair

Obsessed with her unique style, and specifically the way she draws eyelids and noses

f3lc4t

The way they draw those dripping, glowing wisps. I stare at their pieces for hours (no lie) trying to dissect them stroke by stroke to figure out how they do it.

Miho Hirano

Their art has a delicate whimsy-ness I would SELL MY SOUL to achieve 

17- Which one of your creations would you like to see a fiction written about? 

JC, this is the shit I DREAM of.

Definitely this one. 

So this is love.

This little comic means a lot to me. 

18- Do you write original fiction or create non-fandom art? 

Very rarely, but I do, every so often. This is my favorite original piece.

20-  What other hobbies do you have?

Gaming, singing, walking through the Cemetary with my wee daughter, reading, that's about it 🤷

21 - What’s your favorite emoji? 

🙇

22: BONUS - tell us anything you’d like (if you want to).

I really wanted to say that I don't believe in “good” art and “bad” art (just ethical vs non-ethical). That being said, I know what it's like to hate your art, like soooo intimately. If you ever are feeling shit about your art, you can ABSOLUTELY message me (I don't care if we're mutuals or not, I don't care if we've never interacted before) and just say, “I am feeling shit about my art” and I will go through your art and tell you every specific thing I love about it and why it's wonderful. I am not joking; I am so so serious rn. 💗💗💗💗 

[mblue-art]

i’m curious about your take on strawberry nightmare! to you, what’s he like? how does he act? what’s he all bout?

He is annoying (/aff hehe), and even more so to regular Nightmare. I tried to figure out (still am, I guess) how to put the flavor theming and '2P!' thing together, but here's what I have in my head for him ^^ (ramble warning!)

Finding out that the concept of '2P!' variants existed in UTMV too, made me happy! Usually 2P!s are inverted or flipped versions of the original character— think Fell'd or Swap'd versions in UTMV terms— so I thought:

Huh. If he's supposed to be a flipped version of Nightmare, would he have similarities with Swap!Dream? 🤔 But softer, nicer? 'cause he's also strawberry milk-themed! 🍓 flavors and aesthetics can be associated with soft, nice, sweet, cheery, and pretty...

(And sometimes, behind that pretty pink, lies red danger. While regular Nightmare clearly shows that he is a threat, S!NM hides it behind a layer of sweetness; (like a yandere— I explored yandere S!NM here), like a 'nice' character hiding their bad side—

But don't worry! Only those who are deserving of his wrath will face it. He's mean when he needs to. The simps are safe, as well as the people he cherishes! He can be a patient man. Just don't be on his bad side and you'll be a-ok! 👍(⁠◠⁠‿⁠・⁠)⁠—⁠☆

He's like... If regular NM decided to go uwu for the bit, but forever.........(/hj)

He is friendly, a flirt, flips between being all cutesy and rizzing up the simps,

nicely offers you (suspicious— he loves making people doubt LOL) pink sweets in exchange for company or simply as thanks for spending time with him

(A king can feel so lonely sometimes 😩😔 esp w/o his dear brother around... so maybe he has a massive pink house instead of a castle :] Oooh, imagine how pink and aesthetic the interior would be...),

likes messing with the original Nightmare (Ah!! NM hosting parties! Him getting invited! Yes, he'd def talk to the king of the castle but tries to be civil! This is a nice fancy party with lots of people around; he's not gonna ruin this for anyone 😤 he just wants to socialize!!)

(Yes he owns a few creative 🍓-themed suits, why wouldn't he lean towards his aesthetic 😤)

Like any Guardian of Feelings, he can manipulate/control emotions. He can pull out one's negative emotions to calm them down, and he can also make one feel nervous or any other mix of feelings in his presence, just like how his original counterpart does.

As for his role in the multiverse, I'd say he honestly just tries to have fun. Yk, jus a lil chaos. Teehee. No multiverse domination or anything, he just likes being a menace to people hehehe

An idea I thought of a few times is him hinting that he has visited Nightmare's castle (whether he actually talked to NM or not) by leaving strawberry milk (carton/bottle) in the fridge for the others to see and be confused by.

'hey guys where's my choccy milk? did any of you drink it?? it was my last box!' - 'why is there strawberry milk again... none of you drink this...' - 'who keeps getting this pink stuff'

NM eventually informs them about this visitor, and to be cautious, just... Don't drink whatever pink thing he leaves in the fridge.

I've never really thought of what S!NM's backstory would be, what him and his Dream's 'Dreamtale AU' would be, so right now, he's just... There one day (lol) with a brother that keeps? running away from him?? (His Dream is 🟦 instead of 🟨! (I saw an artist drew him as such) And while 🍓 is happy and excited, 🔵 is kinda gloomy... Interesting to see a happy Negativity Guardian and a grumpy Positivity Guardian...)

You can scroll through the #snm asks tag to read past (mostly simp) shenanigans with him, and you can also click these links for my other rambleposts about him ^^

[casterousaudrey]

Polyjuice Confessions

Word Count: 3k

Pairing: Sebastian/reader

Theme: Jealousy, Pining, Confessions.

Note: Reader is a Slytherin, characters are now in their 7th year, I keep seeing jealous Sebastian fics and wanted to take a shot at a jealous reader fic. Hogwarts Legacy has single handedly made me write fanfics again.

"I am yours"

You never really knew when the pining had begun, maybe it was the time you saw how he looked at you in your first herbology class or the time when he took the fall when you were caught in the library. All you know is the rose-tinted glasses suddenly appeared and they never came off. 

When traveling and defeating ashwinders you fight, you find yourself excited to tell Sebastian of your adventures and long for the praises that he usually blesses you with. He was charming, you knew that a lot of other people knew that. Sebastian was approachable to ask about studies or questions about the class so it wasn't hard to take a liking to him. You have bonded with him in your 5th year, seemingly going through up and downs with him but never really leaving his side. You take care of him when memories of what happened to Solomon and Anne haunted him, he knew he could always come to you for whatever he needed. You were always an owl away.

"Merlin to Y/n? Are you even listening" Your friend Imelda seemingly tries to get your attention by waving her hand in front of your face. She noticed you have been poking at your food without really eating it while your mind seems to wonder only Merlin knows where.

"I was asking if you would be interested in trying out this new course I found somewhere near Hogwarts but your mind seems to be elsewhere. Thinking about Sallow again no doubt." She giggles at your flustered reaction. You finally shoved some food in your mouth to hide the fact that you were daydreaming about a certain someone. "Honestly I haven't the slightest idea why neither of you has told the other your feelings. He's attached to you by the hip which I am surprised he's not with you now, and you never really hear one sentence come out of his mouth without mentioning you!" Poppy, is the nicer of the two friends you have, though she was very vocal about you and Sebastian being each other's soulmate every chance she gets.

"Guys please, we're just very good friends who study, go on adventures, and visit Hogsmeade together from time to time....." You sigh as you can't help the feeling of wanting to do those things not as friends but as lovers. The kind who seem like love-sick puppies that either make people scowl in disgust or reminisce about how young love is so pure. 

"Maybe you should brew amortentia to find out if he smells you

"Or ask Ominis, they are bestfriends" 

"Asking Ominis to ask Sebastian feels awkward. It's like having a human owl as a source of communication" Each time your friends find an opportunity to tease or urge you to confess to Sebastian you can't help the fear of rejection which you ponder, might it change your entire friendship forever? You do feel that after all that you've been through your friendship isn't one that will easily snap but a rejection sure would make things awkward.

"You know Sebastian is quite a charmer, even got some 5th years making heart eyes at him so I suggest just getting it over with. I'm sure if even he doesn't feel the same way you guys would stay tight!" Poppy's urged in an attempt to make feel you better.

"Thank you Poppy that made me feel like confessing to him right now...." You sarcastically said as you shoved another tart in your mouth, groaning at the confusing feelings that has been lingering for quite some time now. You couldn't help it, each day you spend time with Sebastian makes you fall for him even more and his flirty attitude surely helps in really making butterflies flutter in your stomach.

"Speaking of Sebastian being a charmer I've been seeing that Cressida Blume flirting with him and asking for his notes even though she writes her own. Something about non-verbal casting" Just as Imelda finishes her sentence you slam your fist to the table which causes some of the Slytherin students and your friends to jump in surprise. "Merlin I can not stand that girl! Ever since the fifth year about the favor she asked about her diary, she's been acting like a total nightmare towards me. She expected me to do something for free and just because she's good at charms doesn't mean she's the best" 

You said in anger but low enough so that not everyone would know what you were talking about. "She always tries to vex me in one way or another. Ugh, I can not stand her!" If this was a cartoon Imelda and Poppy would see steam coming out of your ears right now. You resisted the urge to brag to Cressida about how you could not only cast non-verbal magic but you could cast non-verbal ancient magic but you didn't want to wander around Hogwarts just saying that you could use a rare type of ability. 

"Stay calm Y/n. No use allowing her to get on your nerves. We should probably go to potions class, by the way, don't want Sharp to get any more provoked today." Coincidentally you and your friends had the same class so you could walk to class together. You finished eating and brushed the remaining crumbs out of your robes. 

You hadn't seen Sebastian all day which you assume he took that time to read up on more for his N.E.W.T.S. In every class you have together it became a habit to sit next to him if your friends don't need you that is. So as you were chatting with Poppy about how exciting the recent classes have been she couldn't help but wonder how your face had contorted to a shocked then angry look.

She looked at where you were looking and saw Cressida Blume sitting next to Sebastian and twirling her hair about. Sebastian on the other hand was too kind to tell her that he wanted you to sit next to him, just awkwardly laughed at her jokes. 

"Merlin help me or I will curse her right here right now Poppy" You glared at Cressida's back but quickly gained back your composure as you sat next to Poppy instead, Imelda sitting behind you with her other Ravenclaw friend. "You really got this 'don't give her a reaction' down to the bone Y/n. So nice and composed" You rolled your eyes at Imelda's comment as Professor Sharp spoke up to open your books to a certain page. 

As the class continued Sebastian kept sneaking glances at you as if asking for help but you, too upset at how he could let your seat taken (although there really aren't any permanent seating arrangements), kept looking away and ignoring his signs. "I'm surprised Professor Sharp allowed us to brew Polyjuice today since the last incident of someone taking the form of Headmaster Black" you coughed as Poppy says this remembering that incident clearly and how you toyed with some of the students while using a Polyjuice to become Headmaster Black back in your fifth year. "I think it was quite funny" you spoke out giggling as Poppy raised a brow.

"You are just so smart Sebastian" Cressida suddenly cackled while touching and shaking Sebastian's arm. She also shot you a smirk and continued doing her flirty gestures toward him. "Talk about attention hoarder" Imelda whispered to you as your anger made you put too many leeches in the potion which made it spark and blow up everywhere much to your dismay. "I expected better from you Miss L/n 10 points from Slytherin" You hung your head low with annoyance ad you heard Cressida snicker in your direction as Sebastian shoots you a worried look. 

"Chin up maybe at least after class you'll get your man all to yourself"

"Thank you for the most part Imelda"

 Imelda smiles at you as she helps redo your potion so that Professor Sharp won't be complaining about your 'irresponsibility'.

In all this jealous rage you wondered if you had confessed sooner you could just storm to any girl who doesn't take the hint and drag Sebastian to the undercroft where it was only you and him, most of the time. One of the happiest moments in your life. Just as you finished fixing your potion you were ready to walk back to the Slytherin common room with Sebastian only for Cressida to still be holding his arm as if they were together and it seems she was dragging him to the library so she could 'get more help'.

"You know I should really get back to my own common room, Cressida"

"Nonsense surely you could spare a few minutes?" You heard her talk to him. As they walked away you feel like you could blow up and it took everything in you not to curse her with ancient magic so that not just anyone can cure her. Maybe it was just your anger talking so you try to calm down as you bid goodbye to Imelda who wanted to ride her broom and Poppy who wanted to visit Highwing. So now you were walking alone back to the Slytherin common room occasionally looking at the painting around Hogwarts to try and cool your mind. 

"Y/n may I have a word" 

"Ominis I thought you would be at the undercroft?"

"Well Sebastian tried to ask for help getting away from that Cressida girl so I ought to try and help but I wanted to ask if you could 'save him' since I have an essay to finish by the end of the day" You furrow your brows as you huff at Ominis' request. Normally you would accept it but you were too blinded with jealousy that you didn't want to approach Sebastian right now or perhaps you did want to steal him away from Cressida, either way, you were still mad at the current situation.

"I'm afraid I can't do that Ominis, he has to handle this on his own for now" 

"Well alright. He is capable of handling his decisions anyways"

he seemed to be confused by your decision but ultimately did not question it.

"Y/n wait up!" You turn to see Imelda running up to you with a tired look on her face.

"Imelda? I thought you were going to practice on your broom for today?"

"Yeah uhh I didn't feel like it today" You raised your brow at that since usually Imelda never gets tired when it comes to practicing on her broom. "Ok... did you want to come back to the common room with me?"

"Uhh yes yes sure! Hello Ominis, you look rather dapper as always" it was Ominis' turn to raise a brow at that. Since when did Imelda start giving compliments to others?

"Imelda are you feeling alright you don't sound like yourself"

"Yes yes as I said I am just quite tired" Ominis, though has some suspicion, ultimately let it go as the three of you walked through the castle while talking about current assignments.

"Y/n what is wrong with Sebastian he sounded rather troubled with Cressida following him around" You grunted and the sudden anger you felt before came back that even Ominis could feel the tension thicken.

"Honestly who does she even think she is? She's hogging my time with Sebastian. I know you're also just going to tell me to just confess to him to get it done with but how can I when someone is always at his side?" Ominis didn't mean to put you in a bad mood, he knew about your feelings for Sebastian but he didn't know you would react with jealousy once someone tries to take your time with him. The time he knew was precious to both you and Sebastian.

"Merlin she makes my blood boil, Ominis. Does she think she can just steal Sebastian away like that? I was the one who has been through everything with him" As you continued to ramble and walk ahead of the two Imelda's cheeks suddenly became redder and redder. As the seeming effects of the Polyjuice wears off and all that was left was Sebastian. He transfigures his outfit to the usual male uniform and walked nervously behind you waiting for you to notice.

"He's my partner in every class Omini, so what doesn't that girl get? He's mine well I hope he'll be ... someday... but that's not the point ugh I have half the mind to Levioso her and leave her hanging there until a Professor finds her. You better stop me when I come to that point Imelda" you waited a few seconds for Imelda to acknowledge your reply only to hear silence from both Ominis and Imelda. 

"Nothing like a good practice with a broom to clear my head" Imelda appears in a corridor in front of you as she skips towards where you were. Wasn't she just behind you and following you?

"Wait, Imelda? I thought you were too tired to go practice?"

"Pfft too tired? When have you ever heard me say that"

"Wait if you're here then who-"

You turn to your back only to be met with a blushing Sebastian staring directly at you and nervously fiddling with his wand.

"I was going to show you how well my Polyjuice potion worked...." With the sudden realization of the fact that you have been rambling about Sebastian this entire while he was there your face also turned red as Ominis snickers beside him.

"Well, Im- I am umm I can explain?" You looked down as your jealousy turns into embarrassment while Imelda still doesn't know what was going on.

"Imelda I think we should go on ahead. It seems these two have a lot to talk about" Imelda only grinned at that and acknowledged Ominis as they went ahead to go back to the Slytherin common room.

It was only you and Sebastian left in that empty corridor, conveniently no one has walked by in a while. A minute passed of just fumbling with your words as you try to explain to Sebastian about your rambling and looking down at your shoes to avoid his gaze.

"See I didn't mean all that I wouldn't hurt a defenseless student... Well, I would play pranks but it's not the same as the one I said-"

"I am yours" you stopped rambling and hesitantly looked up at him with a still-red face that only seems to match his, but Sebastian he had a cheeky grin plastered on his lips. Lips that you have always wanted to kiss.

"Honestly hearing you be all that possessive about me is cute because I know I would've reacted the same" he snickers as he steps closer to you to place a kiss on your forehead which made you even more red if it was possible. "I didn't know why it took me this long to do that but I have been irretrievably in love with you Y/n L/n from the moment I first went to Hogsmeade with you. I think I was just scared of losing another loved one in my life that I hid my feelings away" 

He places a hand on your cheek, which you instinctively leaned into as he tucked a lock of hair behind your ear. "No other woman would have my heart at the mercy of their hands and fills my head with thoughts of love more than you"  

You stared at his eyes, the one that you have seen every emotion appear on and darted to his lips, the same one that you have daydreamed of kissing for forever. With these in your mind, you finally made your move. You cupped his cheek and closed the gap between your lips, ignoring the shocked expression on his face. Sebastian eventually melted into the kiss as he held your hand that was on his cheek and rested his other on your waist slightly pulling you closer 

 His lips were soft just like how you imagined and at this moment you felt that he was yours, wholely and undeniably yours. He smiled into the kiss as he realized you were also his and always have been. As you pulled away to gasp for air you could only stare at his eyes and a smile plastered on both your faces as a weight disappeared on both your shoulders. He laughed as he kissed your hand that was on his cheek and intertwined his own with it.

"God I waited so long to do that but I never expected the circumstances to be like this. Then again  I didn't expect you to be so possessive about me"

"Don't even start Sebastian you weren't meant to hear all that" You playfully hit his arm as the both of you continue to walk through the castle hand in hand just purely happy.

"What? It was cute, and for the record, I did signal for your help"

"Well you could have handled that yourself and told her straight up you didn't want to talk to her"

"And miss the opportunity to see your scowling face and the death grip you had on your wand? Never" Sebastian earned a hip bump for that as you kiss his cheek again in an attempt to make him flustered for a change.

"Well it doesn't matter now because I have a reason to sit beside you every time"

"And what might that be? That you're so unbelievably in love with me?"

"That you're in love with me and that's it"

"Me? Looks whos talking" You rolled your eyes at Sebastian and leaned closer to his arm, occasionally swinging your intertwined hands as you walk. It started as a most frustrating day but ended in the best way possible. A relationship built on understanding, friendship, and support. Everyone would only say that it was a matter of time as you arrived in your common room, Imelda silently cheering and Ominis happy for both of his best friends.

Bonus:

The next day in potions class, you and Sebastian were talking to each other while making your potions when you see Cressida shoot a daggered look at you. You only smirked as you pulled Sebastian down to kiss him on the cheek while Professor Sharp was looking away. He was confused but still smiled, appreciating every affection you give him.

You giggled as you see Cressida look even madder than you were yesterday.

[spitdrunken]

currently i'm really busy with writing for my thesis, which unfortunately leaves me with little creative juice... ive been engaging with other people's creations a lot more rather than writing for myself, but have some assorted thoughts on things ive enjoyed recently below, for anyone who is interested. feel free to send me asks about anything that's mentioned, but because of the above, might take me a bit to get back to u <3!

these aren't really x reader thoughts, just rambling! if you read this, thank u, i am giving you a kiss on your forehead/hug/fistbump/handshake/whatever words of affirmation you have been wanting to hear today. pick your favorite!

(Pokephilia mention) Pokémon Legends Z's announcement!! It'll be forever until it's released (which, as a true Pokémon fan, I'm very happy about BAHAHAH), but I'm so excited! Very curious how they are planning to implement, what seems to be, citybuilder elements... If Emmet shows up in this game, I'm going to be super delighted, but I honestly doubt it. Either way, it's made me think a bit more about the twins, and Poképhilia stuff in general as well! It's such a shame/pain the main tag is blocked... one day I will start and stick to my intention to write, like, porn about all the Pokémon, haha. A dream...

(cannibalism(????) monster eating??? mention. consensual!) Dungeon Meshi really was as much fun as everyone mentioned! Don't really see myself writing fic about it, except for a very specific idea I had... I like the thought of Laois 'obsessed with eating monsters' Touden got to meet a monster (AKA Reader) who is equally obsessed with the idea of being eaten!! Maybe a mermaid, or something like that? It's his one chance to eat a humanoid monster! Though the others probably won't believe him when they tell him that it was 100% consensual, and are judging him harshly LMAO

Welcome Home updated! Very happy about this. Though I don't connect them publically, I actually have written quite a bit of WH fic and my sfw sideblog for it used to have more followers than this one LMAOO. Maybe one day I'll write NSFW works for it, but I dunno if there's interest... Plus, I very much fall underneath people the creator would consider 'unwelcome' in their squeaky-clean fandom or whatever, but they have like a quarter million followers now, lol. Anyway, Wally is, as has been said many times before, the Most! He draws me in <3

And also, poor Eddie, lmao. It's very interesting to me, with the inclusion of the Narrator, that the characters seem to be forced to steer in a specific direction, if that makes sense? To upkeep a certain mask. I wonder if 'as above, so below' is a reference to that, in the sense that whatever is dictated by the stronger forces of narrative, is what shall occur 'below'-- In their world. Like, the animosity some of these puppets have for each other!!!!! Some of them are just straight up Not Friends, lmao.

I need to play more of it, but if anyone is reading this, go play I Was A Teenage Exocolonist. I expected it to be waaaay more popular, especially on Tumblr, but it's so underrated? The writing is wonderful, the characters are well-defined, and the art is breathtaking! Please take a look at the trigger warnings, cuz there are a few that are definitely applicable, but it's soooo good... If it has to be said, I romanced Dys first, lmao.

I am watching The Apothecary Diaries right now, just started today, and can I jsut say... I'm such a fan of all the women in this show!! I love the perspective it gives on court life a lot! Maomao definitely is pulling in all the men AND women, huh.... i appreciate that. Jinshi also 100% wants to get degraded by her, huh. Maomao is the sexywoman of this show.

[trainingdummyrabbit]

omg hi. do you have any Thoughts(tm) on don quixote bc she is so so interesting to me :3

the only limbus character ever there Are no other ones shes perfect and can do whatever she wants forever and if she wants to bite someone about it who are we to judge her. go kill girl.

anyway uh, another 'cant listen to anyone talk about them bc this ones Personal' character dkjfgnkf

i have even Less precedent for her; i just feel it in my heart. she has the potential to kill me to death and i am staring at her so deeply. she just kinda kicked in and kept appearing and well. Well. ok yeah sure, i guess shes suddenly a genuine favorite now. coolbeans, excellent.

[inhale] so. i like riffing about her a lot. the sillyfunny yknow, its terminal. and again, i am not limbus'd as much as everyone else is, ihavenot even watched canto4 yet. but points. Somethings Going On W That One.

i like being sillygoofy, but if anyone ever insinuates thats all there is to her im going to get bitey about it. i dont know What she could have going on, but shes one of those characters that Burns. something is burning there, someway, and i am so excited to see what that is. she feels like a character threaded in a specific kind of Wanting, a specific kind of Drive, one that goes and goes and goes, and im so deeply hoping thats true. its difficult to explain.

a lot of her Is masked by her role as a comedic relief, even when she has "moments," and that is Suspicious As Hell. not in a "shes lying" way necessarily but in a "Hey What Was That." kinda way. i Need to know how she thinks. what she Wants, how she Reaches for it. i want to know whats at the deepest part of her, if that makes sense. so much of her is clouded by something or other, but its there theres Something... its something.

i want to know what she stands for and why, what matters to her, where it all comes from. she feels like such a heartfelt character-- i want to know where it lies. no matter what it is though, good for her. she can do whatever she wants forever. i think she should kill about it honestly.

[tired-old-men]

Dude where was this blog when I was 12? I was obsessed with the Brotherhood so much I had the whole family tree memorized. I would info dump at the drop of a hat. I would be so feral about these sad old men and no one- not my family, my friends, or even my dogs- understood what the FUCK I was even talking about so eventually I just shut up and stopped thinking about it. And then my dash is full of Knuckles and now I’m like *gasp* “THE SAD OLD MAN CLUB!” and then you are just here??? Talking about this thing that I literally thought no one except me cared about??? Hello??? Shall we have a spring wedding???

MY BROTHER IN ECHIDNA I FEEL YOU ON A METAPHYSICAL LEVEL!!! I have never connected so hard to an ask in my life. I was hella obsessed with these guys in my teens! I knew their family tree by heart, knew their lore inside and out, I doodled Edmund and Dimitri in my science notes in class constantly, shit these guys lived rent free in my brain with how much I daydreamed about them! I might have had like 3 people tops on deviantart at the time that I could even talk to about these guys, who actually knew who they were and even made art and content for them.

Then came a period of time I ended up leaving the sonic fandom entirely, probably a mixture of being made to feel discouraged in liking my interest from my offline peers and family (back when liking Sonic din't made you a cool kid but a target) as well as getting hyperfixated on other things I just... moved on sadly. It wasn't until last year I want to say, that I stumbled upon @julie-su's art and realized that it was made in recent year, that I got genuinely excited for these guys and the sonic fandom again. You can also imagine my subsequent heartbreak when I found out about the Ken Penders lawsuit and how all of these beloved characters ended up... But as the saying goes if you want something done right you gotta do it yourself! Got sad that there's no more art of these dudes time to make some! It's how I ended up coming back to tumblr and getting to meet more echidna loving individuals and honestly I wouldn't go back not one bit. I'm sad that I feel like I missed out on the Archie comic fandom era back when the comics were still publishing, but I'm glad to be making up some lost time by indulging in the grandpa gang with my online buds. I can't imagine my life without these sad old dudes living rent free in my mind, they keep me entertained, they make me laugh, and bring me much comfort. It makes me so happy to see fans of these guys and new content being made for them just get me so fucking excited and happy.

Most of the time making content for them seems like I am screaming into a void considering how obscure they can be. But in the end, I don't I think I have had more fun creating art and writing than when I started drawing them again. In a way I keep them alive in my memories through my works and that makes me happy. I know the few that know and love these characters also love to see them still around, and have been big inspirations for me to create my own stories and headcanons for these characters and I will forever be grateful for them enriching my life with their creativity. Always a delight to meet someone that loves these tired old men as much as me, your comment literally made my day! Thank you for being awesome and for even liking my works, It really means a lot to know theres still love out there for these characters. I'm always happy to chat with a fellow guardian fan so please don't be a stranger! Besides, we have to frolic down the hills of Angel Island in the eve of our honeymoon~

[crescencestudio]

Devlog #30 | 04.27.23

Hi everyone!

We are back with a monthly update! If you all remember, last month I was feeling a bit burnt out, and I'm super happy to say I'm feeling a lot more like myself this month <3 Thank you to everyone who sent me a lil message/comment, I always appreciate them sm. I won't bore you with my gushing, but I am forever grateful for you all! With that, I'll get into the updates ^^

But first, it was someone's birthday this month! happy bday, hoe.

Writing

I have some exciting news! Kayn's route has officially entered the line editing phase, which is the FINAL stage of editing \o/ This will be the first route completed for Alaris, wow!!! Fenir's route is still going through developmental editing, but the changes are already super cute and he is giving ultimate grumpy baby energy, which we love to see.

I'm still chipping away at Druk's route. Honestly, I'm Very Sad I haven't made as much progress with him as I would've liked, but a lot of my time was dedicated to the enhanced demo this month, and between revamping the demo script, coding, voice acting, and edits for Kayn/Fenir's full routes, I just didn't have the time. I'm hoping this month, I'll finally Actually be able to get his first draft done <3

Art

We officially finished all Demo Backgrounds this month (wow!!). Having started revamping the demo BGs all the way back in, like, November, it's crazy that this first milestone has been reached! Now, it's only full game BGs left. I received the new Dusk Court BG recently, and she's stunning, so I'm excited for the more "core plot" BGs to start coming out :')

In honor of the enhanced demo coming out, I updated the sprite art for the LIs! I'll be getting to the side characters this next month, but I'm really happy with the new art. The differences maybe kinda small for some of them, but I think they look a lot cleaner, and I think the auras especially are pretty <;3 we also whoreified kuna'a

updated sprite preview for kayn, aisa, kuna'a, and etza

The full GUI was also finished this month. I just have to code them in, but it looks SO delicate and pretty and sharp. I'm so thankful to Alice for doing the most outstanding job with them---she is so talented!!

Sneaky peek of screens uwu

Additional Notes

I complained about it 29348 times, but I Finished the Voice Acting Coding this month uwu. That is probably the biggest accomplishment considering how much work it was reviewing all the lines, cutting them, and coding them into the game. I'm terrified for the full routes.

I selected the playtesters for the game so far. Thank you to everyone who applied! I wasn't able to reach out to everyone who applied, and I didn't want to have so so many playtesters, since filtering through everyone's feedback would be overwhelming. But there may come a time when I need more playtesters in the future, so please feel free to keep my little game in mind <3

It's been a bit since I mentioned my Patreon, mostly because I feel bad asking people for money and promoting a platform where people have to pay for content LOL. But it is there, and I do post to it! The reason I bring it up in this devlog is because the highest tier ($10) gets access to playtesting and the second tier ($5) gets early access to finished builds. With the enhanced demo slowly getting finished, I will be doing playtesting for the new beta build this upcoming month in May. SO if you want playtesting/early access to the enhanced demo, please feel free to check out my Patreon* ^^

*Note: If you’re interested in becoming a patron for the early testing/ playtesting, don't become a patron until May starts otherwise you will get charged for both this month and May ((unless you want to give me money for both months in which case u have my eternal love uwu))

Market Research

Lastly, I did a tiny bit of market research this month! I played Bustafellows after my dear friend Seyl (check out her and her team's game Lost in Limbo!!) recommended it to me.

Shu: why is his glove so slutty

And of course the game everyone has been talking about, I played the demo for Touchstarved.

Ais: my favorite, and it's not even close

Looking at these two, and I think I have a thing for smokers lmao. Anyways, I think that's enough from me, so that is all for this month's update! Stay safe, and see you all next month <3

[aihoshiino]

What are your thoughts on how onk is handling ruby recently

So I've been rattling my brains about this since long before this ask – since the chapter 123 leaks dropped, if I'm honest and I think I'm at a place where my feelings are "I understand why these choices are being made, I just don't like that these are the choices they went with".

(I kind of talked about this elsewhere last week, by coincidence, so sorry to anyone about to see me repeat myself LOL)

As someone who really, REALLY loves Ruby, it feels like there's been a consistent failure to properly center her and give her focus and interesting things to do since around the start of Tokyo Blade. Black hoshigan Ruby (as I've mentioned in a previous post) was a really interesting and exciting opportunity to dig into Ruby's trauma and darker feelings that OnK is comparatively quieter on. But with the benefit of hindsight now that the arc is over, it's clear that the whole thing was just a plot cul-de-sac - if I were feeling particularly uncharitable, I would go as far as to call it filler to waste time until Aqua was back in revenge mode. She might not ping back to white stars until 123 but black hoshigan Ruby essentially ceases to be relevant once Aqua is back in the picture until she can be used to serve his arc again.

And the frustrating thing is - I was so, SO fucking excited to see how Ruby was being handled in the start of the movie arc! It felt like we were building up to a really fantastic examination of Ruby's relationship with all three of her mothers, and the way toxic motherhood in general trickles down and poisons someone for long after they're out of the environment of abuse. The incredibly strong and vivid depictions of Ruby literally triggering and retraumatizing herself by engaging with material that depicted Ai's own abuse and the way it dragged back memories of her own abuse and abandonment were so powerful and so scary - her pain absolutely overflowed out of every single page and the care and tenderness with which it was depicted made me feel so deeply for Ruby. This poor, poor girl who has been in so much pain for so long and has done her best to be happy and strong but is at last reaching her human breaking point - it was so fucking good!

The arc we were promised for Ruby at the outset of the movie arc was, no joke, exactly the sort of thing I had been hoping and praying for Akasaka to do for her ever since I got back into the series in April. I really, genuinely thought this was finally going to be Ruby's time to shine and achieve some meaningful healing and catharsis.

And then the arc completely switches tracks to be about Aqua instead and all we've gotten from Ruby since is incest bait and her simping over her brother.

To be clear, I am 100% aware I am being disingenuous here and that there is way more going on than my eyerolling dismissal of it, but I'm trying to get across how it feels for me as a Ruby enjoyer VS how my Themes And Characterization And Narrative brain logically understands what is going on.

It absolutely completely makes sense for Ruby to be behaving this way right now. Gorou was the first and only person in her short life as Sarina to make her feel safe and valued and cared for and having the miracle of their reunion granted to her after she was sure she'd lost him forever and just as she was at emotional and mental rock bottom? That shit was GUARANTEED to turn her brain into soup and Ruby developing confusedly romantic and unhealthy feelings for Aqua vis-a-vis projecting Gorou onto him when she is so desperately in need of comfort and support is maybe not pretty or flattering, but it feels honestly, authentically weird and messy and uncomfortable. Oshi no Ko's willingness to portray character relationships with enough of that honesty to just let them be weird and fucked up and icky and unhealthy sometimes is something I really, really appreciate about it.

My issue is not that this plot point has happened to begin with - my issue is with how it's been framed. This is partially exacerbated by the manga's schedule getting FUBAR'd just after this reveal dropped and thus forcing us to stew in what I imagine is still the relatively early stages of this new status quo for maybe longer than intended, but we have gotten little to no serious examination of how Ruby actually feels about any of this. Almost every interaction the twins have had since this reveal dropped has been incest bait jokes. The fact that Ruby was in the middle of a massively overdue bit of character development that was finally all about her and her feelings only for that to get thrown to one side in favour of her being all uwu oniichansensei and being treated like a comic relief character is just so, so deeply insulting and betrays such a huge lack of respect for Ruby and her feelings.

The relative shallowness and childishness of them is, I think, intentional and accepting this uncritically as yummy ship bait is clown behaviour - we are playing around in this space specifically to soften us up for when the twins finally have an open and honest confrontation about this, but all that means is that for the time being, I am being asked to laugh at and vicariously enjoy Ruby's unhealthy, fucked up feelings born from her deep trauma and to be perfectly frank that just leaves me feeling fucking insulted.

As a survivor of the little sister incest anime boom and a fan of Revolutionary Girl Utena, I simply have no patience for a series that purports to take itself and its characters seriously then turns around and plays sibling incest for nudgewink laughs and ship bait, especially when it has derailed and, in the short term, superseded and ruined what was shaping to be an exciting and deeply emotional character arc for a character desperately in need of focus.

[elderwisp]

i spent the last hours reading tessellate from the start so i just wanted to drop a little love because eeeeeee i like it so much!!! first off all ur characters are a hit!! dynamic personalities, and they all mesh with one another really well in interesting ways. it all feels like a little peek into the lives of random people and sometimes that all you really need babey! i'm excited to see where you go with things especially with atlas, dan (my beloved), also the way that there are multiple storylines/ a large cast of characters yet i never feel overwhelmed <3333 and ofc visually, the post are lovely. the one juxtaposing frances and atlas coping...u know you ate with that. that last closeup with ares and dan with the lighter and frances's recital?? so pretty!! stapled in the brain.

on a less serious note, frances and icarus SAVE ME i like their dynamic so much their interactions seem very organic and fun. a friends to lovers (would they fall under that category..ik he's her boss but they're friendssss) for the ages. i feel like with a name like icarus things are destined to get messy between them and im afraid of it but also im not....but also i need only good things to happen to frances always, tu sabes. and its so funny that i finally read this after you mapped out their first kiss scene, bc i would not have survived the irl four years of building their relationship up godbless <3 also BEEE!!! sorry i just remembered i love bee and i hope she stands up to her boss at work one of these days (and gets whatever she wants for the rest of her life despite how inadvisable it may be at the moment :) )

hope this all isn't too weird, but i had thoughts to share and who better than with the author. tldr: your story brought me joy at 1:15 am and i appreciate it!! also everyone has such cool names??? what a slay. ty and take care <3

live footage of me reading this:

this seriously made my evening i think i reread this about ten times!! i honestly had to retype this message several times because just being able to receive commentary like this is everything. a lot of these characters have been with me for such a long time so to be able to share the little dudes livin their lives AND have people enjoy it??? AWESOME! a lot of the scenes you mentioned are also seared in my mind forever LMAO especially the scene between frances and atlas. i think the week i was gathering everything to shoot it, i completely scrapped the original and the parallels post was a complete spur of the moment thing but i'm glad it happened GAH i'm so excited to share more in the future <3 also with icarus and frances, they're actually my most difficult pair to write for simply because initially (in my ts3 days) icarus was supposed to be such a small part but they had such a good dynamic i had to expand that! so he's a fairly new character for me!

anyways thank you so much! i hope you have a great day! :D flowers is for u <3

[askaniritual]

I hope this isn't too outside of your purview in regards to you liking sollux but do you have any thoughts about how sollux killing aradia informs his character and any potential relationship to terezi given her relationship to Vriska (and how he might think of Vriska)? Sorry if this is not clear but sollux tbh is not a character I think too much about in this chain of events, the focus is usually terezi and vriska (and my personal fave aradia) in the cycle of revenge.

i could hardly declare myself the worlds foremost solrezi enjoyer (which i have, on multiple occasions) if this type of pondering were outside my purview. i got so excited about this question i had to go for a little walk to collect my thoughts.

i definitely think that sollux fuckin hates vriska and there's no world in which they could ever be cool, but i also think the rules vis a vis how acceptable it is to kill another person are like. at least somewhat different on alternia. so even though i dont think terezi could be quadranted to vriska and sollux (at least in any kind of canonverse) i also dont think sollux would necessarily hold terezi's relationship with vriska against her. to me this is also partially because i think he blames himself for the aradia thing more than he blames vriska. like he definitely thinks he should have been strong enough to stop it, and thats what eats him up more than vriska taking petty revenge.

honestly like. to me solrezi is allll about vriska and aradia. sollux and terezi are both characters i understand as fundamentally haunted by these relationships from their past that have become difficult/complicated but that they can't quite bring themselves to end. like they're both characters who had a relationship go wrong and now they have decided they are going to let this define them forever.

so to me solrezi is interesting when they see each other as somebody who is working very very hard to maintain a front because if they let the facade drop for even one second and genuinely let someone else in, then they are going to be opening themselves up to more trauma. and thats why i think they would work really well as moirails because they can be two people who can really understand each other and they are the only person the other trusts not to let their current relationship become a retread of their previous relationship. also i think they would like. chew on each other a little, you know? theyre definitely in a bar bathroom doing lines of experimental research chemicals that sollux bought off the Troll Dark Web tm and terezi wakes sollux up at 4 am so that he can float them both to mickey d's because she's fiending for a shamrock shake. nobody will go near their pile because it's made of shredded legal textbooks and old honeycomb and it is weirdly sticky.

anyway i hope that at least kind of answered your question! i have of course more thoughts abt the (imo) lackluster way that sollux/aradia comes up in canon and fanon i think to both sollux and aradia's detriment and i think it sucks that aradia has to be dead for sollux to make any of his other quadrants available. he deserves more than to be Aradia's Wife Guy and she deserves more than Tragic Dead Girlfriend

[guardians-of-las-vyxen]

Hi I saw your posts about Grease: Rise of the Pink Ladies and I need your thoughts about the newest episode… I need someone to rant with it about lol

Hello Anon! and OH BOY, I am so excited to scream about this show to literally anyone who will listen.

So, Episode 5! Gotta admit, there was some things in this episode I didn't love, but also some things that I did.

Starting with a good thing, the songs in episode 5 SLAPPED and my favorite thing about this show will forever and always be the friendship between the Pink Ladies. The little shadow box they gave Jane at the end of the episode was so cute and this?

"my parents will make us pay, but I can just steal the money back of the register later." - Nancy, a true queen

I didn't know if I was going to have a favorite Pink Lady, but Nancy is definitely pushing hard for that spot! Her costumes were amazing and I just *screee* I love her and I think she deserves good things.

How are we all feeling about the Cynthia/Lydia kiss in this tumblr tonight? I'm not a huge fan of Lydia but that scene and song was fantastic and the whole "does this mean I'm a thespian now" made me laugh. I loved it! It even made Lydia grow on me a bit!

Absolutely disgusted that the school is considering messing with the votes but I would not be surprised to see Buddy suddenly come out in the lead because they'd 'miscounted." I'm honestly more interested in seeing Buddy's reaction to that than anything. If this show wants me to like Buddy in any which way shape or form they have got to make him stand up for something. It's one thing to congradulate Jane in private, it's another to do so in public and stop being a passive doormat to the antics of his shitty friends.

"That wasn't me it was Susan!" - Buddy, being an epic fuckboy. Like his ass did not stand there silent while all this shit happened around him and IN HIS NAME. Jane was not wrong when she called him spineless in her basement speech.

And speaking of Jane, girl what the fuck. GIRL, WHAT THE FUCK? I love Jane but goddamn. Pick a man and fucking STICK WITH IT. I hate love triangles! Modern media stop making love trianges a thing challenge. PICK. ONE. MAN. (And also, maybe don't pick Buddy? The guy who stood idly by as her reputation was trashed- something that was almost entirely his own fault- and as his friends consistintly made nasty comments and spread rumors about her. Maybe let's not go with that guy, huh?)

Also not into the whole Teacher/Student thing they got my girl Olivia doing. She's better than that. Did she forget about the remarks Mr. Creep made about her, the ones that are now in her permanant record? Did she suddenly not remember seeing that? Cause I remember. Even if he wasn't her teacher (but he is, let's not forget that) he still clearly values his own self interest and reputation over hers. Olivia can do better. OLIVIA CAN DO BETTER THAN THIS.

Overall I still liked the episode, but very disappointed in so many characters right now.

Not Cynthia and Nancy though, they were flawless.