#GEEZ TUMBLR RUINED THE QUALITY

[iotaofkindness]

Yo Iota I'm going out for groceries, you want anything?

※ (... candy, please)

[cardsharksplayingames]

The emerald body suit doesn't have a chance with that crappy image. Geez. Such a prejudice.

I am doing my best idk what happened to the quality of the middle pic (I downloaded them all straight from Getty and I had to crop that one but not the others) tumblr ruined it somehow when it posted

[squishysquab]

snowbrofight! heyo @artzom-b i’m your secret santa this year! I hope you like these two goofs havin fun in the snow, drawing this was a blast!

[strawberry-sparks]

so my hair would realistically look like this when I cut it... hopefully... I would love that :')

also stay tuned for the full drawing hehehe

[scarlet-riot]

went to the ottawa geek market yday with some pals and did some casual bnha cosplay! @shooponthemoon is tsuyu, her bf is iida, and ofc i’m ochako 😊

[hueningkoi]

Opinion on captain America ?

Oh geeze lol aight this might get long haha okay so he's... I have a complicated relationship with the dude.... I go from being like "he's okay I guess" to being very very very bugged by him.... lol I was mainly a Tony Stark blog for like.... a good 5 year chunk of my time on tumblr and then I've been around this fandom off and on since I joined tumblr in 2010. For perspective I was here when the only mcu movies that were made at the time were Iron Man and Iron Man 2 (I miss those days. That was true peace. Lol)

I've been here a while man and let's just say... the mcu fandom has not done cap many favors for me liking him.... lol I try not to be like that though and like not let the fandom ruin a character but its hard hahaha I can see some good qualities in the character don't get me wrong! but tbh he's kinda just boring to me and I don't get the hype... ah man I didn't wanna talk shit I don't wanna bum anyone out alsalallaks hahaha eeeeep! 😂

[camping-with-monsters]

So that one scene from Game of Thrones...

This kind of popped into mind for no reason. Decided to draw it out. It was originally going to be just Bayonetta related, but I decided to throw Lucas in for added angst.

Geez, wonder what happened...

Also,,, here's a close up of Bayo and Lucas if Tumblr ruins the quality.

And here's the original scene frame.

[purrrsimmon-blog]

Geez tumblr ruined the quality in this.

My favorite burger is a hangover. They are superior to all other burgers.

second best is a swiss n mushroom

[dick-cheneys-dick]

Let’s talk about my characters

I’m not disclosing all their qualities and names because uhhhh it’s tumblr.

A got my bastardice and ability to try and run from my problems

H got my insecurity and hurries things like I do

A is simply me with square glasses (with a pinch of sarcasm and self deprecation and is really like A)

J got my ability to ruin literally any relationship ever.

Geez the reliable floffy cat. she’s the best.

[duskholland]

Favourite blog(s)? Love your blog~♡ and you of course!

hi nonnie. I love you !!

before I dive in, I’m just going to disclose that I’m really deep in the ‘oh my god I love my friends so much???’ mood so it’s likely I’m just going to ramble at you for a wee while. I’ll try n keep it short. bottom line is, follow everyone I’m about to rec. also, I split the list into (approximate) fandoms to make it easier for myself aha. FOLLOW THEM ALL!

UPDATE: this took me an entire hour. I’m not kidding. I really…I really love my friends. it also ended up being so long that it required a keep reading…

Dylan // Teen Wolf (pretty much…):

@savage-stilinski gotta start off w my fave. I’ve known Julia since our 5sos days and we actually used to be in a group chat together about…geez…I have no idea how long it’s been? it feels like a million years ago. she’s lovely though. I love her n her blog is Quality Content. we’re also working on a collab that’ll be coming out soon so look out for that!!!

@isacclahys Krystal is a gem. that’s the bottom line. we’ve been pals forever and the day I stop recommending her blog and incredible writing is the day I kick the bucket. it’s all amazing; she’s the best. and also the only one I trust to correct my grammar 😂

@lovefilledtragedy gotta give some love to Audrey! she ruined my life by introducing me to Spring Awakening (it’s a musical. it’ll end you. it ended me). also,,,she has a really cute dog and she’s just ??? so, so lovely (Audrey but I guess this also applies to Cookie lmao) !! your dash will be improved x1000 by following her. 

@all-alone-he-turns-to-stone sticking w the theme of Audrey, this is another Audrey who I love love l o v e. she’s so friendly - so friendly - and her blog is just such a positive place to be!

@ninja-stiles Brittttttt! follow her!! fun story, so she and Audrey (lovefilledtragedy Audrey) have managed to both corrupt me. they infect each other with their obsessions (COUGH Frank Dillane,,,,markiplier) and then somewhere along the lines I get caught in the crossfire. they’ve caused me to obsess over people I don’t even know ?? but like, really…Britt’s amazing. her blog is great, her writing is great, she is great. I will rec her til the day I die. 

@thelittlestkitsune wooooords cannot simply describe how much I love Lau’s blog. her writing is exquisite. it’s all amazing, but I highly suggest reading Faded and CEO. she’s such a great writer and an even better person. there’s nothing more to say bc I just think she’s great and honestly…I can’t believe I’m actually friends w her??? 😂

@skepticalstilinski ayyyy Fiona’s a lovely human being. v sweet, v open, v friendly. she’s just great!! (I’m…I’m running out of descriptive phrases but just know she’s a m a z i n g!)

@were-cheetah-stiles I’m just gonna slip in this lil one and tell you that if you don’t follow Cat you’re really missing out. her writing ends me. ends me. she’s the reason I was CRYING FOR AN HOUR LAST NIGHT. cough. not kidding. happy tears tho but….still tears. (and it was actually an hour too??? so, so long?). all her writing is amazing but I suggest starting with The Mistake and going from there…if you’re still alive. she’s great, too, and is definitely a very very positive addition to my dash

@redstringlovers Sammie is loooovely. so, so sweet and incredibly nice. (I’m running out of adjectives here but just know she’s basically just a sunbeam). her blog is a great place n will greatly improve your tumblr experience!

@golddaggers I love this blog. so much (SO MUCH). we’ve never really interacted before but they seem so lovely and just….. there’s some incredible writing right there.

@wittystiles ugh. Sam’s writing. don’t get me started, I won’t be able to shut up 😂😂 amazing !! brilliant !! fantastic !! just…fucking awesome, nonnie. check it out! check her out bc she’s also amazing? 

@rememberstilinski listen. I remember when Kenzie followed me verrrry clearly. picture this: I’m at my best friend’s house. we’re chilling, watching Buzzfeed Unsolved. it’s calm (well…as calm as it can be with Ryan s c r e a m i n g) until I refresh my notifications. I pause. I gasp. I can’t believe my eyes. my friend looks at me, asks if I’m okay. and god. this is fucking embarrassing and I made a promise to myself that I wouldn’t EVER tell this story cbbesfhofuh OKAY ANYWAY I look at my friend and I’m like ‘I can die now. let the angel of death take me’. I’m not kidding. my friend thought (and still thinks) I’m fucking crazy. I ended up almost crying. it was..odd…it was just a really surreal experience that Kenzie liked my blog enough to follow me. I’d liked her blog for so long and I just could NOT believe it. but yeah, Kenzie’s blog is just brilliant. her writing is incredible, she seems like an amazing person (and lowkey every time she reblogs my writing I just die). so yeah. add her to the list of people to check out because FUCK she is great. okay I’m done now I’m sorry for the massive tangent and also @/kenzie if you read this I want you to know that I’m not weird or anything I just really love your blog ahahaha 😂

@maddie110201 such a loooooovely girl. amazing blog, too. follow follow follow.

okay…here’s me getting lazy and deciding that my fingers hurt…

everyone I’m about to list is AMAZING and I would’ve typed them a little bit individually but…I’m lazy…I’m sorry. most of them are writers and HOLY FUCK do I recommend their writing.

@fillthevoid-stilinski @mf-despair-queen  @minhosmeanhoe (girl I fucking adore your URL) @laheyinfatuate @susybird @sumcp  @void-obriens  @ellie-bee242   @inkstiles @dylan-trash-tbh  @writing-obrien @bonniebird  @dumbass-stilinski @obrosey-af @werewolfmutant @iknowisoundcrazy @behind-my-hazeleyes27 @stilinski-jpeg @stilinskiimagines @molesandmischief @stilinski-lover-24 @stilinski-stydia-obrien  @lovelydob 

RIGHT MOVING ONTO EVERYONE ELSE. I’m gonna lump y’all under misc because that’s a lot easier than trying to individually classify everyone according to blogs, n stuff. let’s do this.

Misc: 

@swooncalumswoon  my ride or die. follow Ellie, read her writing, l o v e her. I know I do.

@penelope-clearwaters Demi is amazing. she isn’t active on tumblr much anymore but…again…the day I stop rec-ing her blog is the day I die. SUCH A LOVELY WOMAN. 

@irwinscuddlebuddy Alice is just amazing. I love her so, so much. similar to her blog, she is a High Quality Person.

@truthorclifford Mason’s pickup lines…legendary. she’s brilliant, her blog is equally as amazing! follow for a great tumblr time!! (I feel like a car salesman?)

@irwxnhugsx Sandra is lovely n her mood boards are bloody incredible. follow her also

again…I’m lazy…so just follow the rest of the ppl here. they’re all brilliant. 10/10.

@belameblake  @lostincalum @constant-calum  @like-screams-set-on-fire  @lukesafallingstar  @herewegoagainniall @calumhoodpainsme @candescentcalum @caffeinatedcalum @wastethemuke @ihatethisbandsos @mangoeharry  

[daikaijupro]

I do realize that my Tumblr has lately just been a dream journal, but I never think of this sort of quality story sober while awake, so here goes.

This dream was set sometime around 2050. The chain of disaster and decline had not ended with 2020, but merely started then. It had all led to my current situation: I was a member of a tractor-driving gang of survivors in the battered out ruins of some unnamed city. 

Now, imagine Mad Max, but with the aesthetic of the short film The Last Man. That’s basically what we were. 

So that continues on for a while. At some point there may or may not have been a mutiny that split the gang into two separate factions. We did largely prosper though, forming a small settlement in a junkyard where we all lived.

This makes the end of the dream all the more confusing, because it turns out the entire first part was just a memory of an old man version of myself. The city was still in ruins, and now I had become the final surviving member of the gang, and, as far as I could tell, the city. I sat, brooding, on the hood of my armored tractor (picture the Killdozer for reference). Depression had overtaken me (geez what else is new), and had come to terms with me being the last man on the planet, so far as I was aware.

However, as life often does, it completely upended itself immediately after I had come to terms with it. I heard, from across the city, the sound of another tractor starting up. 

I immediately fired up mine, and set course for the eastern corner of the city from which the sound had come. When I woke up, I immediately knew two things: I had found a partner that would become my romantic interest in the sequel, and that we would face invasion by a gang of militaristic survivors that looked not dissimilar to the space marines of Warhammer 40K.

I’ll keep people posted for the sequel, should it ever arrive.

[scribble-dee-vee]

11 Questions from Robinbibliophile!

Hey tumblr! I keep getting tagged in this 11 questions thing, but since they are a different 11 questions every time I’m still going to do these. You folks have some cool writing questions. I dig it.

Tagged this time by @robinbibliophile. Putting my answers under the cut so I don’t take up too much space on your dash :D

1. Favorite genre?

Fantasy, my dude! I love magic, dragons, and ladies with swords. What can I say?

2. 1st or 3rd, present tense or past tense?

I write in 1st, past tense, but I don’t notice tenses a lot when I read unless it’s 3rd person omniscient. I either love that POV, or it majorly gets on my nerves, depending on how it’s used.

3. Favorite kids’ book? (I don’t mean YA, I mean for little kids)

Papa, Please Get the Moon for Me by Eric Carle

4. Favorite part of writing?

Character creation/development! I love detailing people and getting inside their heads. Relationships are also very intriguing to me.

5. Do you write romance or focus heavily on romantic side-plots? Why or why not?

Everything I write has romance in some form, but I rarely put a lot of focus on it. If I do, it’s because the characters involved have a complex/unconventional relationship that can drive conflict or simply provide representation. I usually prefer platonic relationships, because there are less of them in artistic media and I don’t fall into tropes as often when I write them.

6. Any fandoms?

Heck yes! I’m currently into Voltron, TAZ, RWBY, and Hiveswap, but there’ve been plenty of others in the past. I haven’t visited the Harry Potter, Percy Jackson, or Disney fandoms in a while. I was never into MLP but I appreciate the fan music that came out of it, lol.

7. Any stories you wrote when you were younger that you remember fondly, rather than cringing at? (or maybe both?)

Yes! I wrote a series of novellas in middle school. The first one is called Through the Fog and Into Ziphia. The second is called Chasing Down Revenge. They are not great literature and they are endlessly cringe-inducing, but they were quite an accomplishment for middle-school me. Whenever I read them, I gain new insights on why I’ve developed into the writer I am and why I love writing in the first place. My current project, Heart of Lead, wouldn’t have the style or quality it does now if twelve-year-old me hadn’t tapped those projects out in the notes app on an iPad so long ago.

8. You’re trapped in an elevator with one of your ocs, how does that go for you?

Well geez, this 100% depends on the OC! Luanne would just talk about books to keep both of us calm until the fire department rescued us. Wren would fix the elevator. Charles would be super uncomfortable and probably not do much. Luis would just crack some jokes and keep the elevator mishap from ruining the day. I could strike up a conversation with most of the other Heart of Lead characters, but I definitely would not want to be caught with any of the villains. Especially Dale. He’s not a great person, to say the least.

(And of course, this whole question hinges on the hypothetical that they somehow know what an elevator is. Lmao.)

9. Have any random side hobbies or hidden talents?

I have lots of hobbies! Writing is the biggest one, obviously, but I also play the piano, the clarinet, and the ukulele. I draw, crochet, bake, blog, read, jog, and manage clubs at school. I have no chill.

10. Funniest thing about yourself?

Uh I am generally a ridiculous human being (which I mean in a positive way, I’m cool w myself!). I have no coordination. I’m constantly giggling even when I’m trying to talk, whether it’s from amusement or nervousness or any other emotion. My friends say I have a bouncy walk, so I’ve started to notice that too. Idk what’s funniest, but I’m a bit of an odd duck :D

My questions have a lot to do with OCs, since I want to know more about your fictional children always, and Halloween, because I love Halloween:

1. Have you ever written a Halloween (or holiday) themed story?

2. Is there a particular day you like to celebrate your progress as a writer/artist? (For example, I finished the first draft of my first novel on March 3rd, so that’s always kind of a celebratory day for me).

3. Which OC/fictional character are you most like?

4. Which OC/fictional character are you least like?

5. Which OC is the oldest (in terms of age in canon and/or date you created them)?

6. Which OC is the youngest (in terms of age in canon and/or date you created them)?

7. If you could switch places with one of your OCs/ any fictional character for a day, which one would you switch with and why?

8. How do you feel about pumpkin-spice-flavored foods/drinks?

9. Witches, ghosts, or skeletons?

10. Which OC goes all-out for Halloween, and what do they dress up as?

11. Sweaters or sweatshirts?

Tagging: @storysparksblog, @writingdella, @robinbibliophile, @blackfeatherantics, @seriophi, @christinawritesfiction, @albatris, @ava-burton-writing, @crazybunchwriter, @brynwrites, @hailstonewrites, @joshuareed36, @flannelandsarcasm, @vesperbryan, and @mymandakat. I haven’t tagged some of you before, so hope you like doing these! If not, no pressure. Also, anyone can answer my questions regardless of whether I tagged you. Have fun :D

[evenstevensranked]

#50: Season 3, Episode 20 - “Surf’s Up”

Recurring character Zack Estrada invites Twitty to go surfing with him and his friends. Out of jealousy, Louis, who was not invited — invites himself.. which causes all sorts of drama. Meanwhile, Ren meets and falls for a guy named Gil who she has reason to believe might be a merman.

Okay, so I just want to start off by saying… a lot of people don’t like this episode. I looked at some old forums from 2000-2006 recently and so many people were like “This episode sucked!” right after it initially aired, lol. I guess I can see why they felt that way, but this episode is actually one of my personal favorites. Why have I ranked it #50 then, you ask? Well, upon re-watching.. it felt a little flat and sort of dragged on. It wasn’t as funny or strong as I remembered, but I still absolutely love the basis for the whole thing. If we’re looking at what I’m basing my rankings on, this one probably meets only 2 of the 6 requirements - “personal favorite” and “quality plot line.” So, now that you know my reasoning... let’s dive in. (Pun intended.)

In the opening scene, we see Louis and Twitty at lunch when *dun dun dunnnn* Zack Estrada calls Twitty over and invites him to go surfing at Troubadour Point. Now, this episode actually marks Zack’s last appearance. So, without getting into detail.. Basically, Louis has always been super jealous of this dude. Like, incredibly jealous. The jealousy dates back to early Season 1 and spans 4 episodes throughout the shows run. I refer to it as The Zack Estrada Saga. And here, it continues. The third to last episode of the series, and he’s still jealous.

I know that feel, Lou. 

When Twitty returns to their lunch table he’s talking excitedly about spring break. Which, piggybacking off of what I said last week, is another reason why I fully believe these kids were intended to be high school students. Because, no middle schoolers I know go gallivanting off to the beach unsupervised for spring break, lol. But, hey! Maybe it’s different in 2017. Nah, yeah. Something’s telling me it’s definitely different in 2017. Middle schoolers look and act 25 years old these days, so.

Louis’ jealousy is very evident when he passive aggressively asks Twitty when he started hanging out with Zack and his friends. Twitty says he went surfing with them last spring break while Louis was at a temper tantrum workshop. This is the first funny moment of the episode. Louis responds by screaming at Twitty on the verge of tears, “nOW YOU LISTEN HERE! I EXPRESS MYSELF APPROPRIATELY NOW!” Louis decides to go ahead and invite himself to Troubadour Point even though he has no idea how to surf.

This episode was always somewhat refreshing to me, because it’s one of the only ones where we see our characters in an environment other than their houses or school. That’s something cool about early Disney Channel shows. They weren’t contrived or restricted to a sound stage on a fake beach like Hannah Montana, for example. They’re actually at a real beach and I love it. 

They make a point to show Twitty and the owner of the beach shack rub a sacred lucky surf idol tiki thing and say “Pray for waves!” Louis enters the shack with his surfboard (which is bad luck apparently) and knocks over the tiki. Yikes. This reminds me of The Brady Bunch Hawaii episode, lol. I was just waiting for the bad luck music to play. Zack was already a little annoyed when Twitty told him Louis was coming, so now… his dislike for Louis is pretty strong. 

Side note: I feel like Disney Channel totally typecast Brandon Baker as that ~ethnic surfer bro.~ For those of you who don’t know or never realized, he also played Johnny Kapahala (a.k.a Johnny Tsunami). I just came across this cute little followup series Disney did with him last year. Side side note: Brandon is actually biracial (white and fillipino) and they portrayed that accurately on screen in the Johnny movies! Random to mention, I know. But I’m biracial so I get oddly happy when I notice this stuff, lol.

There are actually two mini subplots in this episode, which might contribute to its “off”-ness. We have Tom who’s trying to build a perfect sandcastle. And we have Beans who’s metal detecting, but just ends up stealing people’s stuff. Beans really shouldn’t be there. His bit is useless. I understand it was most likely an attempt to get everyone involved in the fun beach location episode.. but, I feel like there might be too many things going on here.

Tawny is sitting by Tom, all covered up from the sun. Tom asks her why she isn’t helping with the sand castle and she’s like “Oh, I’m just waiting for a little more cloud cover.” And, Tom says “Oh. Right. Heaven forbid a ray of sunshine should touch your precious porcelain skin.” Tom is the best. But of course.. Twitty, Zack and the surfer bros go running to the ocean and step all over the castle. Louis is trailing behind them like a lovable uncoordinated doofus and ruins the remainder of it. Tom is so sad. Bless his heart.

Ren, Ruby and Monique are chilling on the beach too when some guys ask them to hang out. Side note: This one dude who Monique runs away with!! I always thought he looked familiar and as I was watching it again today — it hit me! He went on to be a member of fictional boyband Boyz N Motion from That’s So Raven! Omg. I looked it up just to make sure, and I was in fact correct. His name is Michael Copon. So, there’s that.

Ren is on the dock throwing pebbles and shells into the sea when a guy emerges from the water and throws shells back at her, lol ok. The two start talking and she finds out his name is Gil! Yep. THE Gil who breaks her heart in a pancake house in The Even Stevens Movie. Gil swims away, and Ren can’t help but notice the giant glimmering fin that splashes in the water. I’d honestly be a little confused, too.

My inner subconscious Social Justice Warrior came out a bit when Ren sees Monique and Ruby doing their hair and makeup and says “Ah! Makeup and hairspray at the beach. Very nice, girls. I thought you already met some guys.” To which they respond, “Yeah, and we wanna keep them.” NOOOOOO! Sorry. I hate to view things through that lens, but after spending so much time on Tumblr and Twitter (especially in the current climate of the country) it just rubs off on you! Ugh. You can’t escape it! Anyway, Ren tells them about Gil and the whole fin thing and they find it absolutely hilarious.

Out on the ocean, Twitty and Zack’s crew are bummed because there are no waves. Zack angrily says “Pfft! I wonder why…” And gives Louis the nastiest look as he comes paddling up to them all happy. I feel so bad. Zack yells at him for bringing his board into the shack and breaking the lucky surf idol. The gang desert Louis and head back to the beach for lunch. Twitty sides with them saying “sometimes I just need to do my own thing, man” and leaves Louis alone in the middle of the ocean. My poor baby. :(

I will not stand for this! Protect Louis Stevens at all costs. 

Louis goes back to the beach and once again walks right through Tom’s sandcastle. Come on, man! You could’ve walked around it, lol. It’s not even like he was running.. he was casually walking. I can’t. He goes to the dock and finds Ren with binoculars looking for Gil. The two of them have a “conversation” that’s not really a conversation. It’s just them going back and forth ranting about their own problems without actually listening to the other. It’s a cute sibling moment, haha. I actually really love Louis and Twitty’s friendship, though. They’re like an old married couple in this episode. I think it’s adorable. During this scene Louis is so fed up with Twitty ditching him for Zack, so he decides to go surf on his own. Meanwhile, Ren is ranting about Gil being real, knowing what she saw and that she’s not crazy.

“At least your best friend didn’t ditch ya. He’s hanging out with his ~new~ surfer buddies. They’re probably having a good’ol time. Laughing, eating onion rings. Twitty doesn’t even like onion rings! Ya know?! So, it’s weird. He’s probably faking like he likes them!” I love this.

Ren decides to go out on the ocean in a boat and call for Gil by making dolphin noises. She brought sardines to lure him with and everything. This is pretty funny and one of my favorite scenes because it’s rooted in miscommunication. Plots with comedic miscommunication are one of my favorite things ever and it’s executed really well here. Naturally, Gil pops up from the water. Like... I’d believe he’s a merman, too. Why is he out there in the ocean all the time?! What was he doing underwater?! How long was he under?! How was he breathing?! All valid questions. 

How creepy is that?! lol

He swims over to Ren and tells her he was getting Lobsters for his dad, King Neptune. I’m dead. She’s like “Wow. So you really are a sea person…” - “Yep, born and raised!” he says. This is gold. Then we get a super cringy, awkward moment. After a tiny bit of flirting, Gil proceeds to dramatically kiss Ren????? Slow your rolls, buddy. That’s a little fast for Disney Channel, don’t you think? They just met 2 hours ago at the most, and Ren is in middle school. I’M TELLIN YA! THESE KIDS ARE SUPPOSED TO BE JUNIORS AND SENIORS IN HIGH SCHOOL, I SWEAR! It’s the only logical explanation for certain stuff. 

Beans is a freaking idiot who hovered his metal detector over peoples’ pocketbooks and crap all day and stole their personal belongings. But he refers to it as “buried treasure.” How stupid can you be?! Like I said, he’s pretty useless here and did not need to be included in the episode. Plus, you know I’m not the biggest Beans fan. Finally, we see him hover the detector over a tip jar in the shack. He goes to steal all of it before Tawny stops him. Tom comes over and announces that the Lost and Found is open, yelling out all of the items in Beans’ bag lol. There’s one bit where Tom shouts “ONE GOLDEN……. oh geez, this is mine” and sneakily puts it in his pocket. Uh. What the heck was it?! Do I even want to know? Can anyone tell what that is?

While everyone’s in the shack sulking over the lack of waves, Twitty decides to go out and attempt to surf again. While he’s sitting out there, a freaking giant wave comes out of nowhere and sweeps him away. Louis notices and runs to Twitty’s rescue! They don’t skimp on the dramatics here. Louis kicks into full Baywatch slo-mo mode with an 80s knockoff power jam “You can count on mEeEeeE, I will always beeee thereeee for youuUuUuU” playing in the background. So good.

One thing I really like about Even Stevens is that it doesn’t take itself too seriously. They’ll throw in giant computer generated waves, and a terrible green screen job - but it doesn’t matter. It’s not supposed to look good, it’s supposed to be funny. It doesn’t need to look real to sell the moment on this show. (Christy said something similar on the movie’s DVD commentary!) If this scene looked realistic, the episode would pull a 180 and turn into a drama. That’s not what they were going for, haha. 

A totally not superimposed Twitty getting swept away.

Louis cracks me up. Literally anything out of his mouth is funny because of the way Shia phrases it. Once he rescues Twitty he says “You know what’s funny to me? That the worst surfer in the world is havin’ to save Hot Shot Surfer Boy over here.” They proceed to argue like an old married couple some more. Twitty says he never called himself Hot Shot Surfer Boy. Louis calls Twitty two-faced and insists he buy him a Philly Cheese Steak to apologize. It’s so petty, I love it so much. When suddenly… ANOTHER WAVE COMES OUT OF NOWHERE! We get a wonderful Louis Scream as they frantically paddle. They end up briefly surfing the wave together. 

Twitty: “DUDE THIS IS SO AWESOME THIS WAVE’S LIKE… 10 FEET OVER OUR HEADS!” Louis: “DON’T CHANGE THE SUBJECT, TWITTY! I’M STILL MAD AT CHUUUU!”

Louis falls off and disappears into the sea, which is hilarious looking. But, also awful because if this was a drama, he would’ve died. But, anyway. Twitty comes riding up to shore and everyone surrounds him with praise for conquering that gnarly wave all by himself. Meanwhile, Louis washes up to shore covered in seaweed. This poor child. The two of them share one of those conflicting ~emotional~ moments where one person knows they’re being a jerk and looks off sadly at the person they’re letting down. :( Thankfully, Twitty tells the truth when Zack asks him how he caught the wave and everyone’s shocked that Louis actually did something right.

Ren’s sitting on the beach when some guy approaches her, and she realizes it’s Gil…? But, he’s walking? With legs? And then everything gets cleared up. “King Neptune” is the name of his dad’s seafood company, and he swims with a uni-fin flipper. I almost wish there were more layers of miscommunication! It could’ve been even funnier.  

Louis and Twitty end up having a heart to heart while sitting in Tom’s sandcastle. It’s precious. I wish I had a friendship that tight. Instead I’m sitting here, indoors, blogging about a fictional friendship. Twitty apologizes for ditching Louis, and Louis apologizes for inviting himself. But, Twitty says he’s glad he did because he might not be alive. “Yeah… The whole save your life thing. Whatever, it’s all in a day’s work.” I love Louis. How could you not be this guys friend?! To this day, I wish I had a friend as funny and chill as Louis. Dang. Twitty even bought him a Philly Cheese Steak! Aw. They split it and it’s a nice moment. But, as they’re eating.. they have to throw in a bad line. “Huh. It’s a little dry, isn’t it?” Louis asks. Cue another giant CG wave. Get it? Now the sub isn’t dry anymore! Hah..hahaa..ha…? I never thought that line was particularly funny. It’s almost on par with this terribly cheesy (and insensitive) deleted scene from Titanic. But the visual of them getting hit by the fake wave while sitting in a sandcastle is one of those things that will always cheer me up. I can’t look at that without laughing.

And that’s it! The episode ends with a random Twitty-Stevens Connection music video "Dawn Patrol" lol. The song always gets stuck in my head. Ugh. It’s so cringy in the best way. I actually love some of the bloopers they included. But, hey! Who’s the rando on bass? Beans became their bassist earlier in the season. They use Beans for a throwaway metal detector plot, but don’t have him play bass in the band he plays bass for. Okay. Also according to the episode credits, AJ Trauth actually wrote the song! Haha, awesome.

So, yeah. My opening statements pretty much sum up my feelings towards this one. But, one distracting thing I feel like mentioning is that this episode uses one too many unflattering fish-eye style close ups? WHY?! Look:

One too many! ONE TOO MANY! Paul Hoen directed this one. He still directs for Disney today, btw! I wonder what made him decide on this? It really stood out to me and gives the episode a bit of an offbeat, quirky feel. 

Thanks for reading guys! I feel like these posts are getting longer and longer. I have to reel myself in here. (Okay, no pun intended there.) As usual, chime in below. Are you one of the people on that old forum who thought this episode sucked? I personally like it a lot and was tempted to rank it higher!

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[bl-tl]

[DJ-TL] Hijikatagumi Honmaru Hatto Dai Ichijou [DONE]

Raws: @just-felt-like-doing-it

Translation: BL-TL @ TUMBLR

01 Hijikata Clan Inner Citadel Laws, Rule 1

02 You’re late, Kunihiro~

Kane-san drank 801 Sake.

801 Sake refers a super top-quality sake brewed by the Tsukumogami of a barrel living near the Inner Citadel Despite being alcohol it possesses the ability to allow the lower half of a man to enjoy the convenient development of certain situations without withering (coined term) Of course, the drinkers who receive this ability do not realise it. Furthermore, when the Tsukumogami converted all the human ages everyone was an adult.

03 Who... who let Kane-san drink alchohol... (After all I begged for you to stop...)

04 Wha? Kunihiro, you annoyed? (Go on, smile~) Aah, yeah. Let’s go to the room, Kane-san.

This person took after his previous master and can’t drink at all. / After drinking last time he was throwing up all over the place, causing a lot of trouble, so please. (Stop him if you see him drinking!! Yes...)

You smell good fresh out of the bath (I might get hard... Wha... Kane-san, what are you saying...)

I’ll be taking him back for now!

(He drank, but it was only one cup... But he really is something~ Who cares, let’s continue!!)

05 Geez, Kane-san. / After I told you so many times that you can’t drink (Here, it’ll get wrinkled so I’m taking it off!)

...Kunihiro. Do you feel sick? Want water?

...Why are there three of you...

[Kanesada Vision] Huh?

Which one’s the fake?!!! Wait, Kane-san?!

06 (Alright!) Now there’s one of you.

There was only one of me from the beginning! This drunk!!! Don’t get mad, don’t get mad... Alright already, can you untie this now? Kane-san.

Kane-san? Kane-saaan? ...Kunihiro

07 You’re sexy. Huh?

(Eek) (Hello) Pft!

(Kane-san?!) What might you be doing?

Sorry sorry, it was just so cute... (Don’t give me that!!!) Enough already, untie... (You’re being strange, Kane-san)

Kunihiro / Sorry, I’m hard. Huh...? / Why... you drank alcohol, right...?

How would I know...

N...no, stop... It’ll feel ba...

That’s...

08 Kunihiro... you’re rather soft here... / I haven’t used anything and my fingers slipped in easily.

Ca-cause...

We were gonna celebrate clearing the 100th floor of the Osaka Castle Underground / So I thought we might be doing it / And prepared...

09 Kane-sa... I can’t handle it so... sudden...ly...

I guess doing it without anything was a little too much.

10 Sto... / rubbing the rim...

This place has really given in to accepting me.

11 ...Oops. ...That was close.

This is in the way.

Kunihiro?

What are you sulking for? (I’m gonna strip you) (To be honest I’m still not used to these things called buttons...) Ku—ni—hi—ro

Pff...

Kane-san, that tickles... (Stop...)

12 Hmm? This?

Geez, I was mad at you and you ruined it...

Wha... Kane-san?! / I said it tickles... (Squeeze)

Kunihiro~ you tightened up down there. (Here, here You like this kind of thing right, Kunihiro-san~?] I’m not...

13 (Look at this) Kunihiro, it’s gotten all red and puffy now There’s no way I can see...

It’s like a coralberry.

Makes me want to eat it.

(Nnh) (No...) I don’t... like / the sound...

Kane-sa... Ah... it’s sliding...

No... It’s sliding out...

14 Kunihiro~ / Your hips are really shaking.

Sorry, sorry / I was neglecting this end.

You’re really tightening up now / Do you like being pounded at that much?

Gee... Kane-san’s really weird today... En...ough...

15 Eh... Kane-san?

You don’t want to, right? Eh... no... (Expectation You don’t hate it, right? ♡) Eh... you’re wro...

I can’t trust just your words.

16 There’s no helping you.

Kane-san... I can’t... use my hands / so it isn’t going in well... Ah...

17 It... / It’s in, Kane-san...

Kunihiro, I can’t see your nipples. / Raise your arms.

18 What a view.

Kane-san... / Isn’t it... (enough already...)

Alright, I’ll make you come properly.

19 Deep... I can’t hold...

Aah, I’ll support you so relax

Kane-sa... hands... / Untie my hands... (Please...)

(Tch) Can’t be helped.

(Ah ♡) (Kane-san / Amazing) (Ah) (Kane-sa... / I’m...)

(Ah...)

20 (Ah.. / Ah...) (Ah)

21 Sorry / Kunihiro.

Eh... / Kane-sa...

It won’t go down at all...

22 Eh...

Wai... / Kane-sa... Eh Eh You can’t... Eh

(Ah... ♡)

23 Hijikata Clan Inner Citadel Laws 1. Offering alcohol to Izuminokami Kanesada is forbidden

Please make sure you do not let Kane-san drink any alcohol!

Especially Jirou-san and Tsurumaru-san! I understand. Yeah, yeah. ‘Yes’ should be only said once! Yeees....

[Noticeboard] What happens if this law is broken? / Seppuku? A scolding. Eh?

[Sound soul of the Demonic Vice-Commander] I will give you a scolding. / (And one by one, your nails will...) (Sorry!!)

(Uwah) It was quite the uproar last night... (You’re standing rather stiffly, Horikawa. Leave me alone!)

Well, nothing bad happened in the end. (Leave it.) Eh? Yes, that’s true.

His neck.

24 (Horikawa’s interesting. Don’t make fun of me!!) If there’s that much in that spot / I wonder how many marks are on the rest of his body. (How intense was it?)

Sup. (My head hurts...) Don’t make a ruckus so early in the morning...

Ah, Kane-san! / I asked them all to stop giving you alcohol. (Kane-san, you should make sure not to drink when invited to too!) I said I got it already! / I don’t actually remember what happened yesterday.

Aah, I see. (You... you don’t remember?! Did I do something? Something...) That law might just be a defense measure to stop himself from completely falling.

END

Credit to BL-TL @ TUMBLR if using.