#GOING INSANE PRINCESS DIANA FIT !!!!

[thekintsugi-adult]

*sweating* is this anything

[plasticfangtastic]

Can we be lonely Together?

A Homelander x Stalker!Reader fan fiction

This is my first fic for this fandom (and in a decade lol) this is a bit of a slow burner and will have about 8 to 9 chapters.

This is a Gender Neutral reader (but honestly is just me shipping Homelander with Joe Goldberg... so feel free to see it as a crossover, just not going to make it clear at all in the fic.)

Summary: We were two mouses pretending to be cats, weren't we?

We didn't expect to find ourselves in this situation, but John... Homelander... you were perfect... none of this was a lie, these feelings I got are genuine! So I don't know why you're using such words like: Stalker, Psychotic bitch, Insane, liar! To describe me... after all I've done? To help you!?

You were wrong.

I just yearned to get closer to you. So what if I did my homework? After all it was you who played along.

I knew you knew... you were so loud.

R18+ (there will be smut, drug abuse and gore in later chapters) gore, stalking, killing.

Chapter One

Apologies

It pains me to say this… I'm genuinely ashamed, embarrassed more like it! To admit that I genuinely wasn’t impressed by you. 

        Your face had been painted on every surface to death... It has grown boring.

       Nothing but an overbearing presence to the common man, but the average citizen didn’t loathe you, fear you, hate you or even found you pastiche! They simply adored you. 

        Your face was plastered on everything one could imagine and then some– I’m not just talking mugs by the Target checkout area or birthday cards, and keychains, but sausage packages in the supermarket! Your face wasn’t all that special to me… I used to think of you as nothing more than an aged jock from a John Hughes movie, the tights didn’t fool me, you wore the varsity jacket underneath the foam-- I had bets that you were going to be the worst the world could’ve manufactured if I ever met you.

Now… Now I see… I was wrong… contrite is the word that describes this social faux-paux of mine. 

Now I see… just how… unique you were-- the whole world didn’t have the faintest idea of just the sheer amount of bullcrap you had to endure everyday. Gosh I couldn’t even fathom being in your shoes, the fantasy alone proved heavy, and you had to do it all while looking more well adjusted and prim than Princess Diana during her divorce.

I’m sure you’ll be so divine in that revenge dress too.

I mean… you sort of knew you looked good in women's clothes, Is okay I like adventurous men… I’ll admit  I might've dressed you a couple times in my head… but don’t worry! It was all flattering.

Which in terms of flattering things… it's a shame that this is how you catch me, how we end this farce, this game of pretends... today you could be the cat… I wish at least I had the time to wrap up the plastic sheets, or wash all this off me.

I feel the weight hit my foot directly, I barely wince, but I’m not taking my eyes off of you, feeling wet bubbles and gurgles tickling my bare toes– all I want is to give you decades worth of misplaced attention to those red eyes of yours… I seen your face in a million different ways, but never had I seen it in such vivid technicolor-- There’s no red that can quite match your eyes… as they watch me from this eighteen story window, inside an apartment smaller than your closet (that’s New York city for you kids). I can admit to having fantasized being on the receiving end, it would be fitting for me, us.

This building is so loud, it overwhelms us both, but unlike you right now I don’t have to listen to the upstairs neighbors petty grievances, the next door lady wondering where her kid is at these ungodly hours, the stoner in the elevator, or the homeless man wondering if his dollar store hooch was tainted with something because right now there was the freaking Homelander hovering above him! So I listen to her… right at my feet… gargling… hacking… I didn’t cut deep enough, and we both can hear it… knife still in my hand, her mind is nothing but the flashing lights of a faraway train, it’s ever so silent as the train drives off, all she can think off is a trip to europe when she was a child, and the snow devoured the sun and the music, it was just her, the train, the snow and us now.

“‘Is not what it looks like?’ Is that what you want to say?”

yeah. I mean… Can I? I licked the knife clean as if it was residuals from an apple, trying not to roll my eyes at you.

“Evening… John… Homelander.” My hand is on the window latch letting the cold breeze in, your eyes suffocating me just like the bitch behind us…  I almost whimpered as they lost their candor giving me back blue moons– What brings you here?”

You points behind me, unable to believe I just said that, I give way for you.

Always staring at me– I want to hear your thoughts… for the first time in all my years of life I am yearning to listen, feeling every particle of my being falling apart as they're begging me to listen to your thoughts once more… but I can’t… Right now I’m in Finland, is winter, is cold-- everything you aren’t… because I am sorry… I pry so much.

The way you watch me isn’t undressing me further, I am mostly bare, just underwear and sweat and my soul too tainted for you to want to seek, I can’t make sense of that smirk on your lips that has only now begun to reach your eyes… this somehow has amused The Homelander, your laugh scares me far more than your ray-guns– are you mocking me!? No you…you wouldn't be, you’re gentleman after all, if you wanted to mock me… you would treat me like Miss Barrett, or Kevin.

I mean… I don’t want you to hate me. We are perfect for each other. We would be perfect… so just… let me… explain.

“Where do you like me to start?”

Your foot crushed the skull leaving it nothing but a gummy, clumpy pancake under your booth, sick of hearing it mope and cry for any longer it seems, you immediately threw your cracked phone at my feet.

“The beginning.” The Homelander growled.

[charming-charlie]

The Compliment Game

Title // The Compliment Game

Pairing // Evan Buckley x Reader

Warnings // Light amount of cussing. Some cute fluff and a bit of spice at the end.

Summary // Buck poses as your fake boyfriend at a friend’s birthday party.

Word Count // 3k

You stared at the invitation before you, trying to hold back a laugh. Having just got the mail, you found a pink envelope mixed in with your bills. The envelope had elegant script and for a moment, you thought you were invited to a wedding. Upon opening the envelope and pulling out the card, your suspicions still stood in place. Glitter fell to the floor and the invitation was written in such a beautiful script, except it was not for a wedding at all. It was for a birthday party. Your childhood friend Viola’s birthday party.

The invitation included a dress code, which basically stated prom attire. Yeah, fat chance of that happening. There was also a list on the back of the invitation with appropriate albeit expensive gifts to buy for the birthday girl. Cool, so money it is!

The invite was definitely in line with Viola’s personality. The two of you were supposedly childhood best friends, and as you grew up, you realized that Viola was a bit of an embellisher. She told the most insane stories, some you knew to be completely fake since you were there when certain events happened. It was like she always had this need to one up everyone she met.

The two of you barely talk now since you distanced yourself from her, but honestly, she was still your friend. However, since Viola liked to embellish, who says you couldn’t either? Why not one up the birthday girl at her own birthday? Maybe she needed a healthy dose of her own medicine.

The wheels were turning as you grabbed your phone and scrolled through your contacts before landing on Evan Buckley’s name. He was, in all honestly, the hottest man you knew. While he was only a recent friend, he was the best option for what you had in mind.

You called him, hearing the phone ring a few times.

“What a coincidence,” Buck said when he answered the phone, “I was just talking about you.”

You were surprised that you were on his mind, especially in the middle of the day. You were sure he was at work too, which only seemed to excite the butterflies in your stomach.

“Hey,” you said, unable to hide your growing smile, “I got an invite to a birthday party. Want to go with me as my fake boyfriend?”

“Whoa,” you heard Buck say on the other line and you could just sense the confused expression he had on his face, “wait, what?”

You stared at the invitation, knowing full well that this would be the perfect event to have a little fun and maybe put Viola in her place. However, you took what few precious minutes you had on the phone with Buck to explain everything. You talked about your friendship with your friend, and how she just continued to make up her entire life story in order to appear interesting. It was either that or for attention, you weren’t sure which one.

“Basically, I just want to show off the hottest guy I know, so are you in or what?” you finished. You were out of breath from rambling quickly to share your story. You never knew when the alarm bell was going to go off because of a fire or something.

“And you thought of me? I’m touched. Sure, I’ll do it. But you owe me a beer,” Buck said. You could practically hear him grinning on the other side of the phone. “I’ll pick you up after my shift. Say, eight?”

You agreed and the two of you hung up.

This was perfect. Now the party would be very interesting. Who knew what was going to happen?

The hours ticked by and you were dressed. You texted Buck your address and waited for him to show up. He knocked on the door and you truly felt giddy and nearly pranced to the door in excitement. You weren’t looking forward to the party at first, but spending time with Buck? That was clearly a game changer.

Having relayed the dress code to the firefighter beforehand, you were in awe of his outfit choice. Buck was sporting a casual black suit. It wasn’t the fanciest of outfits but that didn’t matter. He looked like a stunner. It was nice seeing him out of his usual fire uniform or regular t-shirts. You could tell he put effort into his appearance for the night.

You, on the other hand, took a page right out of Princess Diana’s playbook. You wore a black dress, your favorite LBD, with some strappy heels. It was your own revenge dress, and you knew it wouldn’t exactly fit in line with the dress code of the night, but did you really care?

You were only going to support your childhood friend and nothing else. You had a card for her with some cash and that was it. You were going to make nice and leave when the cake was cut. That was called being a good friend, you at least showed up to the events you were invited to.

Viola’s parents owned a ranch and she lived in a house on her parent’s property. The drive was smooth, with you and Buck jamming to 80’s tunes and timing the red lights. He was such a charmer, just like he was the day you met him.

There were a few cars when you arrived, and Buck easily parked along the rocky path. Both of you got out and made your way to the front door. Being polite, you knocked.

The door opened instantly, almost like someone was literally waiting on the other side.

Viola appeared and your eyes almost popped out of your head. Apparently the “elegant prom” theme was still ongoing, since she wore a floor-length white gown. It looked like a cross between a prom dress and a wedding dress. Your eyes caught Buck’s, who was standing next to you. He looked horrified. Perhaps he was just now realizing your over exaggerations were not over exaggerations.

His mouth fell to the floor, not from awe, but from shock. The birthday girl cascaded along the floor. Her hair was done up in an elaborate bun and she wore a crown. Not a cute little tiara, but a full blown one thousand gems kind of crown. The kind of crown that was obviously from a costume store, since you knew Viola wasn’t fabulously wealthy like she pretended to be and there was no way she would be able to afford the same jewels as Queen Elizabeth.

“Oh, who is this?” Viola asked you when she saw Buck. No hello. No how are you. She just immediately noticed the eye candy on your arm with absolutely no regard for you, her supposed best friend.

You had to give the firefighter some credit. He cleaned up very well. He sported a business casual suit, not at all falling in line with whatever prom theme that was happening. Then again, you did not either with your little black dress.

“This is Evan Buckley,” you said, trying to put on the best sincere smile that you could muster, “my boyfriend. Happy birthday, Viola.”

Your best friend (although, let us be honest, that is a bit of a stretch at this point), did not seem convinced nor did she thank you for the nice birthday message. Instead, she turned her sights onto the man next to you, and you felt a small hole in your heart forming. If Viola went after Buck… it would not be pretty.

“Boyfriend, huh? What do you do?” Viola asked as she extended out a hand, and you cringed when you saw the white corsage that sat on her wrist.

Buck, being as polite as ever, shook her hand and kept his smile. “I’m a firefighter with the LAFD.”

“What a coincidence!” Viola said with a smile, “My boyfriend works for the LAPD. Maybe you know each other.”

Buck was catching on and there was a sort of twinkle in his eyes as he looked at the birthday girl. “I have friends in the LAPD. What’s his name? Maybe I know him.”

The fact that Buck was pressing for more information caught Viola off guard. She acted busy, acted like someone was calling her name, but you didn’t hear anyone. “Oh, that’s for me. I’ll talk to you guys later, yeah?” she sauntered off quickly, almost like she was rushing away as fast as she could so that you didn’t have a chance to call her back.

Buck turned to look at you with a quizzical expression as if to say, what the hell was that? You only shrugged your shoulders and whispered that Viola doesn’t have a boyfriend, ending the statement with a blatantly obvious eye roll.

The two of you made your way into the house where the party was in swing. No one else looked like Viola, no one else sported fancy gowns or black tie suits. In fact, a few of the party guests were wearing jeans. That must’ve been a highlight in the tea drinking gossip Viola was probably spewing in the corner with some other friends. Is it time to leave yet?

You led Buck outside to the fenced in backyard. There were a few guests here and there, but it wasn’t a massive turnout. Both of you sat on a wrought iron garden bench, away from most of the crowd. It was kind of nice to be there at the party but not really participating or engaging in small talk with the other guests.

“You know,” Buck broke the silence with a smile, “being your fake boyfriend is a lot of work.”

You rolled your eyes and turned to look at him, returning the smile. “You only agreed once I said you were the hottest person I know.”

“Listen, that’s a compliment I don’t hear often,” Buck sat back along the bench, keeping his eyes on you.

“Should I keep them coming?” you asked, and it surprised you that there was a little bit of a tease to your voice. You never noticed that before.

“How about this? You compliment me, I compliment you. I feel that is only fair,” Buck responded.

It took a moment for you to forget that you were actually at a birthday party for someone else. In this moment, on this bench, everything around you seemed to fade into the background.

“I like your suit.”

“I like your dress.”

Okay, starting out kind of simple here but it did make you smile. You thought you wore the dress to impress Viola. Maybe you wore the dress to impress him? Did your subconscious plan that?

“You are very good at your job,” you responded.

His eyes were alight and there was that twinkle again. You could stare into his eyes forever, they were stunning, just like everything else about him.

“Not exactly a compliment, you haven’t seen what I can do,” Buck said with a smirk. That was when he pulled the move. The fake-stretch put-an-arm-around-you move. What in the fresh hell was that? Because, and this is what shocked you the most, it actually worked on you.

“You’re beautiful,” Buck said.

Fuck, he won the compliment game. Your face flushed, fast and hard, creeping down to your neck and down your spine. You had to look away from him, and you heard him laugh when you did.

You didn’t get to enjoy the moment for long because you heard Viola approaching the two of you, with some minions behind her. You looked at her. Her white dress was absolutely blinding in the fading sunlight and you squinted just to see straight.

Buck stood up to greet her and you did the same, smiling politely at her.

“Sorry about that. Being the birthday girl means never ending attention. Anyway, Y/N didn’t tell me she had a boyfriend. How did you two meet?” Viola said. There was a sudden look in her eyes, and you knew. You knew she was catching on, pulling on loose threads to see what would unravel.

You felt Buck slip his hand in your own and he didn’t miss a beat. “Y/N locked her keys in her car. I just happened to be driving by.”

That was the truth. That was literally how the two of you met. If fate were a thing, you would swear that was how you guys met, through some act of divine fate. But you remained quiet.

“Forgive me, but I’m having a hard time believing this. If you are really Y/N’s boyfriend, then kiss her,” Viola said. She seemed to be smirking, like she trapped you and Buck in a corner, like it was a big reveal that your relationship with Buck was fake.

Buck inhaled deeply, like he needed to calm down a bit. His hand gripped yours tightly, but you could feel that it was tensing up. Thank god for that, because you didn’t know how he would react if you didn’t keep him grounded and firmly planted next to you.

“Y/N,” Buck said, and your head snapped to his attention. He was looking at you. Once your eyes fell into his line of sight, he swooped in. His free hand went to the side of your face, caressing the soft skin of your cheek. His lips landed on yours, moving delicately, gently. You were not in control of your body as you felt yourself pushing into Buck’s muscular physique. When he pulled away, your lips quite literally pulled down into a frown. You didn’t want the kiss to end, and it showed.

Once the environment came back into view and you were aware of your surroundings, you quickly fixed your expression and turned to look at Viola, who looked slumped and defeated in her white gown. Perhaps she truly felt she was going to win the game you and Buck were playing, and she wasn’t prepared for the outcome.

“Is that enough proof or do you need more?” Buck quickly looked at Viola, and he didn’t look very happy. Viola got the hint. She disappeared as fast as she arrived, with her entourage scattering in different directions. Once she and her friends were gone, Buck turned to you and said, “I don’t like that girl.”

You were still in a bit of a fog from the kiss, and you could feel your lips tingling for more. The sensation would not go away.

Eventually, much to your chagrin, it hit you. The moment was over, you proved your point. No need in keeping things going. You did your job, made your appearance with a devilishly delicious man on your arm, and now you can go home and leave Buck alone. He probably was not thrilled with the outcome of events, given the look on his face.

“I think it’s time to put an end to the fake boyfriend thing,” you said with a frown as you looked at him.

There was something new to his expression, an unconvinced look as he shook his head. “Maybe I want to be the real thing someday.”

Was this playful banter or was he serious?

“That would require going on a real date,” you said. You grabbed him by the arm, keeping up with appearances as the two of you walked to the gate in the fence. You unlatched the opening and watched the gate swing open.

“So ask me.”

You stared at him in confusion as the two of you slowly walked toward the car. It was starting to get interesting again.

“Ask you what?” you replied.

“Ask me out,” he said suddenly, not missing a moment.

Your heart was erratic at this point, and you let go of his arm now that the two of you were away from the party.

“Dearest Evan Buckley, would you do me the absolute pleasure of going on a date with me?” you said sarcastically.

He wasn’t playing games anymore. Without a warning, he had you pinned against the car, leaving very little wiggle room. Your body pressed along the passenger side door, and you felt his hands rub against your waist. You were facing him, and you wished you weren’t. Looking at that incredibly handsome face was becoming a weakness. Your knees shook as you tried to steady yourself.

He leaned in and whispered in a soft voice. “Try again.”

You felt his hot breath against your ear as he kissed the sensitive spot under your earlobe. An explosion of tingles erupted throughout your body as his lips brushed against your weak spot.

“What are you doing?” you asked quietly. Any louder and you were afraid how shaky and trembling your voice would sound. First, he won the compliment game, now he was winning whatever this was.

“Ask again,” Buck whispered in your ear.

One of your arms ran up his, and fuck, that was a mistake. The bulging muscles were almost too much for you to bare.

“Will you go out with me?” you whispered.

You felt his lips leave a trail from your neck, across your jawline, ending with a sweet peck against your lips as he smiled.

“I thought you’d never ask,” he said as he opened the car door behind you, “Let’s go get that beer.”

It was easy to slide into the car since you were already a puddle of goo. Your whole body was on fire just from his touch. Buck walked around the car and entered the driver’s side. He turned the key in the ignition and the car roared to life. His hand reached for yours and you accepted it instantly.

How in the world did the evening turn out like this? And where in the world was it going to go? You could only wonder as Buck began driving. Inviting him to a party as your fake boyfriend was the best decision you ever made, and you couldn’t wait to see what else was in store tonight.

[crunch-barr]

u mentioned making a rec list for books for children that are less problematic and better written!! i would love to see those <3

welcome to bean's list of book recommendations to read to your kids instead of h*rry p*tter, from an ex-hp kid who looked really hard for good books to fill the void all those years ago:

(pls lmk if any of them are problematic or haven’t aged well and I didn’t know, I’ll remove them from the list !!)

disclaimer: i was a kid reading kid books during the early 2000s and early 2010s, and I’ve realized while making this list that a lot of the writers I read growing up are... very white and cishet. that’s not to say there weren’t diverse writers being published or trying to get published, but there was certainly a lot less push for diversity in genre fiction (especially children's) back then. to make up for this I’ve added links to lists of diverse middle grade novels after my personal faves list, I haven’t personally read all that are mentioned on those lists but I plan to! please go check them out!!!! Most of them were published in the past few years

personal childhood favourites of mine:

The "House of Secrets" Trilogy by Christopher Columbus and Ned Vizzini. This was my favourite series as a kid, and surpassing HP in my mind at the time was like. Insane. That being said, goodreads has some simply scathing reviews of this by some adults who thought it was too violent and crowded but 12 year old me LOVED it SO MUCH. There’s some violence, there’s magic. It’s about three siblings and their creepy old house that can travel into books, but the books they travel into are WILD. I remember the second and third being better than the first. These would be fun to read aloud, too

"Where the Mountain Meets the Moon" by Grace Lin was one of my absolute favourites as well from that time. I’ve read it as a late teen/young adult as well and it still holds up. It takes inspiration from Chinese folklore, it follows a girl named Minli who takes it upon herself to find fortune for her family. I remember carrying this book around in my backpack for like a year after I read it bc I loved rereading it so much. It’s so good guys it’s so good

"The Princess Bride" by William Goldman. This might seem like a basic pick, but it’s on the list bc I read this out loud with my mom when I was 10, taking turns, and it was SO FUN. I had the time of my life. It’s such a romp of a book and works so well read out loud.

The "Chrestomanci" Series by Diana Wynne Jones— it’s the same sparkly magic as HP, but written better and also written first. I liked everything she wrote, but this series was really solid. My fave was The Lives of Christopher Chant

“The Girl Who Could Fly” by Victoria Forester retains that HP school vibe, with kids with superpowers instead. I remember loving this book a TON as a kid. I remember some specific scenes so clearly, they just live in my mind constantly

Rapid fire multi-book series’ I’ve read and generally liked, that would be fun to read to your kids:

- the "Land of Stories" series by Chris Colfer

- the "Wrinkle in Time" series by Madeleine L’Engle

- "Mysterious Benedict Society" by Trenton Lee Stewart

- "The School for Good and Evil" series by Soman Chainani

Honourable mentions that didn't really fit the list:

- "Good Omens" by Terry Pratchett and Neil Gaiman (actually a lot of Terry Pratchett is good for this genre!! I also loved Gaiman's books as a kid but they are a bit darker)

- "From the Mixed-Up Files of Ms Basil E. Frankweiler" by E.L. Konigsburg (I just love this book too much to not include it)

Honourable mention but not a middle grade read-aloud style thing:

- ALL the Lumberjanes volumes by Noelle Stevenson (et al.)

And here are some links to diverse middle grade fantasy lists that have been published recently!

https://www.feministbooksforkids.com/middle-grade-fantasy-books/

https://www.barnesandnoble.com/blog/kids/8-amazing-diverse-middle-grade-fantasies/

https://www.readbrightly.com/contemporary-diverse-middle-grade-books/

https://hclib.bibliocommons.com/list/share/220740577/677756200

https://www.google.com/amp/s/lgbtqreads.com/middle-grade/%3Famp

https://resilienteducator.com/classroom-resources/diverse-childrens-books/ <- this link also includes an excellent portion on the importance of diversity in children’s fiction, while also talking a little about how diversity has become much more prevalent in publishing since the early 00s.

There are so many good books out there. Go read! Read good stuff to your kids out loud!! Support your locally owned bookstores!! Buy books for your kids that aren’t written by bigots

[harrylilies]

The Royal Series | Pt. VIII

The Royal Series Masterlist

"Come on, Henry!" You laughed at your brother, wrapping the scarf you got him around his neck. "It's your best picture!" The green and red scarf had a picture of him fighting a pap in 2004 all over it, ready to be worn.

"You were only 10 when this happened, how did you even remember this?" He laughed, wrapping his arm around your shoulders and squeezing you to his chest.

"Brings out the colour in your eyes." Will said, helping Charlotte off of his lap and letting her run towards you.

"Think you should wear my gift to your boyfriend's family meeting." Harry joked, letting you go.

You rolled your eyes, scooping Charlotte in your arms. "Did you see Granny's face when I opened the gift?"

Harry mimicked, making everyone in William's drawing room laugh. "Admit it, it's a nice sweatshirt."

"The best thing to wear to a first family meeting; Harry Styles have my babies. Excellent choice." You said sarcastically, swaying Charlotte gently in your place.

"Teetee, did you like my present?" Charlotte asked enthusiastically, wrapping her arms around your neck.

"I loved it! I'm putting that picture frame beside me, on my bedside table. So every morning when I wake up and every night before I sleep, I see you and your brother. It's the best to wake up and sleep to, Charlie." You smiled, pressing a kiss to her cheek, "Also, our little squish here wrote me a very nice letter." You nodded towards Kate's baby bump.

Spending more time with your family doing nothing but laughing, teasing one another, and reminiscing the days when you were all younger, it wasn’t long before you were putting on your coat and ready to leave.

"Do you have to go?" Charlotte whined, frowning as she looked at you.

You cooed, "Aw, none of that now, Charlie. I'll be back before you know it."

"Yeah, Charl, Teetee will only be gone for a few days before she comes back." Kate said, standing beside you as she assured her daughter, "We don't want Y/N leaving with us crying and her getting sad, do we?"

Charlotte nodded before letting out a dramatic sigh, "Okay."

"Now, I really have to go. Want to help me get my bags?" To which Charlotte nodded eagerly to, making you grin, "Where's your brother? Where's Georgie?"

"I think he's in his room." Will said, standing up.

"Let's go get him, Charlie. Let old Daddy sit, wouldn't want him hurting his back." You said teasingly as you walked past your brother, hearing everyone behind you snickering.

"Hey! Don't tell my daughter that!" Will joked, making you wave him off.

Reaching George's room, you let Charlotte knock before you heard him give you a "Come in!"

You opened the door gently, peaking yours and Charlotte's head inside to see George sitting on his floor, playing with the train toy set you had gotten him. His head snapped towards you, a grin instantly drawn to his face as he stood up and sped towards you, hugging your legs. "Auntie, you're still here!"

"I am, baby, but I wanted to ask you if you want to join me and Charlie and help me with my suitcases?" You stroked his scalp gently.

"Yes, of course! I'll get my train." He said before walking back to his previous spot, taking one red train before walking beside you, holding your hand.

George opened the door to your room, going inside and climbing up the bed till he sat, his feet dangling and swaying as he made train noises and flew his toy in the air. You sat Charlotte beside him, giving her the small piano toy she had left in your room the previous day, before unlocking your phone, finding 3 missed calls from Harry.

"Shit," you cursed under your breath, turning your phone slightly to find that it was silenced.

You instantly called him back, balancing the phone between your ear and shoulder blade as you opened your plain blue suitcase, double checking that nothing was missing before checking your duffel bag, too.

"I thought you got cold feet." Harry said as soon as he picked up, followed by a heartfelt laugh.

You smiled to yourself, taking your red sweater in your hand, "No, no. My phone's mute button was probably pushed by accident. Is something wrong?"

"No, love. I just wanted to make sure that you're," he cleared his throat, "You know, still coming."

"I am, H. I'm about to leave," you assured him before chuckling, "They still don't believe you?"

"They don't. Even showed them a couple of pictures but they told me that my fans make insane photoshopped pictures. I’m starting to feel very offended."

You laughed, zipping your suitcase. "Good thing I'm spending New Year's with you then, huh?"

"The best. Still sure about that? Wouldn't your family have your head?" He asked. "One, I'm sure. Two, told you it's me who decides. Now," you held your phone with your hand, "I have to go get dressed. I'll text you when I'm near, okay?"

"Yeah, okay. I'm waiting for you. Take care, yeah?"

"Always do. Bye, baby." And so, it slipped from your mouth, making your eyes widen and your other hand to cover your mouth.

The pet name didn't seem to go unnoticed by Harry as he giggled quietly into the phone, giving you an eager "bye!" and a kissy noise before hanging up.

"I'm going to go change, I'll be right back." You informed your niece and nephew who only nodded at you, too engrossed in their toys.

_

With the car door open wide for you, you bent down, hugging George and Charlotte close to your chest, kissing their temples. "Be good for Mummy and Daddy, will you?"

"Yes, Teetee." They both replied, their arms on you.

"Come on, give me a kiss." You smiled, patting your cheeks for them to which they giggled at, leaning forward and planting loving kisses on your cheeks. "I love you."

"Love you, Teetee!"

Getting into the car and blowing everyone a kiss, you nodded at your driver who stood by the driver's door side. "Don't worry, Ben. I’ll be careful." You smiled, "You spend some time with your family."

"I did actually spend a wonderful time with my wife and the kids." He smiled, closing the door after you got in and put on your seatbelt before you put down your window.

"Oh! Did they like my presents? I certainly hope they did. Although I'm not so sure about the sizes, I just picked the ones suitable for your daughters' and wife's ages." You chuckled, looking up at him.

"They loved it, Your Highness! And the sweaters fit them just right. Lilly especially wanted me to thank you and invite you for a tea party." Ben chuckled humorously as he referred to his youngest daughter, only being 5.

You grinned, perking up. "I love tea parties! I'd gladly come if you'd let me."

Ben laughed in delight, nodding eagerly. "Of course we would! You're welcomed to visit anytime, Your Highness."

You smiled, starting the car before waving at him before you drove off, already feeling the nervous butterflies in your stomach at the thought of meeting Harry's family after a 3-hour drive.

Meanwhile, Harry sat on his mother's sofa, laughing at Gemma's embarrassing stories that Anne was telling Michal, Gemma's boyfriend, laughing at his sister's sour face.

"Oh, come on. At least I'm not as delusional as Harold here, says he's with HRH Princess Y/N." Gemma snickered.

Harry groaned, dropping his head low in defeat. "She's coming in a few hours."

"Oh dear, I have to move the pebbles for when the horses arrive on our doorstep." Anne joked.

"She doesn't move in coaches, Mum." Harry laughed.

"Probably wings." Gemma joked, motioning with her arms to wings, making Harry throw a cushion on her.

"Stop it, Gemma. Stop making fun of your brother," Anne said, standing up and taking two of the many empty glasses on the table which belonged to some of Harry's family whom were in their presence but left, "I raised you both to never make fun of troubled people." She giggled, speeding off to the kitchen.

"Hey, why are you doubting him? Harry's pretty big and known." Michal defended him, looking at Gemma.

Gratefully, Harry made prayer hands as he closed his eyes, mouthing "Thank you" to him.

"I'm not belittling him but," Gemma began, "This 23-year-old woman, one of the most beautiful, whose father is Prince Charles and mother is Princess Diana and her grandmother is the fucking Queen and was raised and continues to live in the monarchy is pretty big, too."

"You always believed me when I told you about my girlfriends." Harry gave her a side eye, raising his eyebrows.

"Because you dated what we now call ordinary people, T Swift, Kendall Jenner. If a colleague of mine told me that they were dating them I'd believe them," she stood up, taking a couple of glasses before following Anne to the kitchen. "Better start cleaning before Her Highness arrives.”

Harry rolled his eyes, looking at Michal. "At least you believe me."

Michal chuckled, standing up as him and Harry started helping Anne and Gemma with the remains of the Christmas get-together they threw.

_

"It told me to make a left, so I did." You said, glancing at your phone in its holder before looking at your surroundings. "Alright wait, I'm coming outside." Harry said through the speaker, the sound of some shuffling around being heard next.

"Are you wearing a green jumper?" You asked, squinting your eyes to get a better look at the figure in front of you.

"Yes! Is that you in the black ca-Oh, hi." He giggled as you drove closer to him, finally getting a clearer view. "Bye bye." He eagerly said before hanging up, watching you park in front of him.

You grinned as you rolled your window up and took your keys and phone, Harry opening your door for you.

The moment you got out, Harry wrapped his arms around your waist, bringing you chest-to-chest closer. "You look very cuddly right now," he whispered, kissing your hair. "You always look cuddly now that I think about it."

You laughed, putting your hands on his chest and looking up at him. "I got some nice cocoa powder for hot chocolate. It's the best you'll ever have."

"I think we have marshmallows." He nodded. "Where are my manners?" Harry asked himself. Smiling as he leaned down, he pressed his lips to yours. Your leaned back on your car, smiling into the kiss as your hands moved to his jaw.

"They still don't believe you?" You asked as you took your breath, glancing back at his house before looking at him.

Harry rolled his eyes, "They teased me enough."

You tried not to laugh, though did a terrible job at it, before patting his chest, "Come on then. Let's meet them." You got out of his grasp and towards your boot. Right as you were about to take your suitcase, Harry beat you to it, taking it out, draping your duffel bag on his shoulder before closing the boot.

"I can take it." You said as he rolled your suitcase in one hand, the other holding yours.

"So can I. Come on." You both walked towards his open door, you smiling sheepishly as you tried not to look around.

"It's quiet." You whispered as Harry put your suitcase and duffel bag beside the door after kicking it close.

He chuckled, "They're in the back."

"I got presents." You whispered again, "Oh shit, I forgot to take them from the backseat." You opened the door, practically jogging towards your car before Harry followed you, grinning as he saw you take out neatly wrapped medium sized boxes in glistening and vibrant Christmas wrapping. "I trust you with the sizes you gave me."

"You got Mum that dress you showed me?" He asked, helping you and taking two boxes, leaving you with one which had a card on top of it with your neat handwriting that said “Merry Christmas, Michal!”

You nodded, humming. "And got Gemma the striped suit and the golf watch for Michal. Is that all alright?"

"Baby, I told you that you don't even have to get anything." Harry chuckled, bumping his hip with yours.

"It's Christmas, H. Everyone deserves nice presents." You smiled.

"Let's put these under the tree." Harry said, raising his eyebrows upwards as you both walked inside. Instantly smiling at the cosy aura the place had, your eyes fell on the twinkling Christmas tree by the window. You put the box under it, waiting as Harry put the other two there.

"And your gift is in my suitcase." You giggled, looking up at him.

"Yours is in my room." He replied with a dimpled grin, "Come on."

With his hand on your waist, you both walked towards the kitchen where you heard chatter and clinking, making you look at Harry, giving him a nervous smile. "Oh God." You whispered to yourself, huffing out before putting a strand of your hair behind your ear, your fingers lacing together in front of you, sheepishly.

Harry gave you a quick peck on the cheek before walking inside the kitchen, clearing his throat to catch his family's attention.

You could almost hear a pin drop. All of their jaws dropped, faces going tint red, looking intently at the new addition. You looked up at Harry for a second before looking back at the ones in front of you. "Hi, I'm Y/N."

"What the fuck?" Gemma was the first to speak, Harry cringing as he squeezed your waist slightly. Gemma's eyes caught her brother's, who widened his green eyes at her before she cleared her throat, drying her hands in the yellow towel on her shoulder before putting it on the chair. "Do I-Do I curtsy?"

"God, please don't," You laughed, moving forward and naturally wrapping your arms around her in a brief hug. "You look a lot like Harry. It's insane."

Still at a loss of words, Gemma awkwardly hugged back, looking at Harry from over your shoulder as he smirked at her, cocking an eyebrow. "You look like-" She cleared her throat, "Like how I see you on the telly."

You chuckled, pulling away, "I'm hoping that's a good thing?"

"Yeah, of course. Of course, it is."

"Excuse my daughter," Anne spoke, moving forward and approaching you with a wide, loving smile. "I'm Anne."

You and Anne hugged, her rubbing your back soothingly as she did. "I've heard a lot about you."

"Good things?" She asked jokingly as you both pulled away.

"The best." You nodded in confirmation.

"It's so nice to meet you." Michal said, leaning down and giving you a greeting hug before looking at Gemma, "Guess your brother isn't so delusional after all, huh?"

"Shut up." She said under her breath, covering her face.

"Let's take this to the living room, shall we?" Anne grinned enthusiastically.

"They're starstruck." Harry leaned down, whispering in your ear.

"I'm more of in awe that I'm meeting them." You giggled, holding his hand that was draped from your shoulder.

"Who got-Oh God, did you-" Anne gasped, looking back at you from the tree.

"It's Christmas. It's also a thank you for making me spend New Year's with you." You smiled warmly, feeling yourself get hotter, “I hope that’s okay.”

"Did I just get a present from the Princess of the United Kingdom?" Gemma asked her boyfriend quietly who tried to stifle his laughter and not burst out laughing before his face fell, looking at one box under the tree, "Yup. She got you one, too."

"I read online that's she's known in the royal family to get the funniest Christmas gifts." He whispered back.

They couple both shared a look before looking at you, laughing at something Anne said. "We did make fun of our Harry, honestly. Sorry, darling."

"I felt very offended, thank you very much." Harry put his hand on his heart dramatically before looking at you, "How was your drive here?"

"Very nice and quiet. That intersection you told me about saved me a lot of time." You pointed at Harry.

"No offense, sweetheart but what do we call you?" Anne asked warmly, “We have never really interacted with someone from the royal family this close before, excuse us.”

"Please, don’t worry. Just Y/N would be great."

"And please call me Anne," Anne pointed at herself, "Oh where are my manners? Are you hungry, sweetheart? We had nice turkey and mashed potatoes."

"Mum makes incredible turkey." Harry said from beside you on the sofa, his hand on your knee.

"Thank you so much, Anne, but I think I'm so full. I managed to get myself pizza on the way.”

“How many slices did you have? You can’t be that full, love.” Harry asked.

“Got a large and finished it all actually,” you shrugged, “But actually, I got us some fine cocoa powder if you fancy a nice hot cocoa cuppa. It's homemade." You grinned, standing up to walk towards your suitcase, "Actually if you don't mind, I can make them."

"Oh, love. You really didn't have to." Anne laughed in delight, watching as you shook your head at her with a warm smile, "Gemma can help you."

"Of course!" Gemma perked up, standing up, "I personally love eating cocoa powder."

You laughed, pointing at her, " Me too! My brothers make fun of me for it all the time."

You and Gemma walked towards your suitcase by the door before you opened it, taking the packet of cocoa from one of the pockets and closing it. Gemma hummed, closing her eyes "It already smells so good."

"Trust me, it's the best you'll ever have." You assured her as you both walked back to where everyone was. Harry leaned his head back on the sofa, looking at you upside down before giving you a childlike wide grin, almost as if he was assuring you that it was going well.

_

Standing in the kitchen with Gemma as you warmed the milk, she cleared her throat, getting you to look at her. You felt nervous, almost as if you were preparing yourself for the talk.

"So, you and little Harold? How did that even happen?" She chuckled, looking at you as she leaned on the counter.

"I've been a fan of One Direction for as long as I remember and I've always, you know, kind of had a soft spot for H. I don't get to go to concerts and shows very often but I went to his show a few months ago after getting in contact with Jeff then I met him. We met then we went to this local bar not far away with the rest of the band and we sort of," you shrugged with a smile, "Clicked."

"I bet he was shitting himself," she laughed, turning off the stove before taking out mugs for you. "From what he told us, you haven't been dating for long."

You nodded, "Almost two months."

"I'm sorry if this is too straightforward but does your family know?" Gemma asked quietly.

"My brothers and their partners know that we're together, yes. Uh, my grandparents and father know something is going on but we kind of had," you gestured with your hands, "A disagreement you can say. They'll come around."

"But you're planning on telling them, right?"

You nodded instantly, "Definitely," you paused, sighing as you looked at her, "I know what you're thinking. I really don't plan on hurting Harry."

"What about your family? Do they not?"

Deciding to not take it to heart, you simply shook your head. "My family won't get in the way of what makes me happy."

"I'm sorry if I come off as a bitch, I just," Gemma stopped, looking at you sympathetically.

"I understand," You smiled, "I'd do the same if I were in your place. You're just looking out for your brother and I truly respect that."

Gemma smiled in gratitude before shaking her head, "God, you sound so posh."

As the night went on and everyone was more comfortable, you were tucked in Harry's side, his arm wrapped tightly around you.

Empty mugs of hot cocoa were proof of the success and so were the smiling faces in the room. Gemma, Anne and Michal sat with their presents on their laps as they waited to unwrap them.

First went Anne, neatly unwrapping the present after complimenting your choice of wrapping paper. Her eyes almost widened at the Versace box, opening the lid slowly as she gasped at what's inside. She took the dress out, holding it at arm's length as she gushed over it. "Y/N! This is gorgeous, sweetheart!" She stood up, holding it over her.

"Ooooo, look at you." Gemma grinned, now feeling over the moon excited to open her present.

"This is a lot, Y/N."

"It's not, I promise. You're letting me stay here for 6 whole days, Anne. It's the least." You truthfully said, giggling when she gave you a kiss on the cheek.

Harry grinned at the interaction, rubbing your arm.

"Okay, my turn!" Gemma exclaimed, unwrapping the present before gasping at the Alexander McQueen box, "Oh God," She laughed, opening it. "Ooooo,"

"I trusted H with the sizes." You informed them, watching as Gemma took out the black and white striped jumpsuit out.

"I love you already." Gemma pretended to wipe her tears, making everyone laugh. "Thank you so much, Y/N." "You're welcome, Gemma. I bet it would look so good with red lipstick." You wiggled your eyebrows.

"You know what? We're going out tomorrow and I'm wearing that." She pointed at you. Gemma sat down, elbowing Michal, "Go on then."

Opening his box after unwrapping it, Michal let out an excited laugh as he looked at the expensive golf watch he remembers telling Gem about it a year ago. "That's massive! Thank you!"

"It's no problem. Harry told me you're really into golf. He helped me with this one." You smiled up at Harry who scrunched his nose.

"Did a great job, mate."

_

You left your hair down as you changed into your pyjamas, walking inside Harry's room. Right as you stepped inside, Harry quickly covered something with the covers, making you stand on the doorway with your hand on your hip. "Got something, Styles?"

"Don't know what you're talking about." Harry shrugged, tilting his head at you with a cheeky grin.

You sighed dramatically, "Guess I just won't give you your present then."

Harry laughed, throwing his head back, "Y/N!" He whined.

"Fine," you chuckled, "Alright I got you a bunch of stuff actually." You took the rectangular box out of your duffel bag, holding it out as you sat beside him on the bed, crossing your legs.

"Okay," Harry breathed out, copying your moves and sitting in front of you with his legs crossed, unwrapping the box. "You have really nice wrapping paper."

"Thank you, I take pride in choosing and wrapping them." You giggled, bringing your knees closer to your chest as you rested your chin on your knee.

The first thing Harry got out of the box was a book that had a cat in front books and a typewriter on cover, the title being "I Could Pee On This" along with "And Other Poems by Cats"

Harry burst out laughing; his eyes shut and his head back as his hand slapped his thigh. "Where did you even find this?!"

You only shrugged in response, grinning at his reaction. "I know you love cats and I thought it might be exactly what you need."

"I definitely needed that. Thank you, baby." He laughed, putting it beside him before taking out the next item. His eyebrows furrowed as he looked at the packet in his hand, reading what was written; "Animal butt magnets."

"When I first came to your house, I noticed your fridge didn't have any magnets so I thought you should add a few there."

Harry laughed, turning the packet to you, "You got me animal butts for me to stick on my fridge?"

You nodded excitedly, hugging your legs, "Precisely!"

"You're absolutely mental." Harry chuckled, leaning forward to peck your lips.

"Now for the grand, real gift!" You exclaimed in a reporter's voice, opening your arms wide.

Harry grinned, glancing at you before closing his eyes and taking the last item out of the box. His eyes fell on his hands, laughing, "Love, is that-" He glanced at you before opening the wallet in his hands, "It's a wallet! You got me a wallet that looks like burnt toast!"

"I love all of them!" Harry laughed, moving until he propped himself up on his knees, cupping your face in his hands as he pressed his lips to yours. "Has anyone ever told you how creative you are with gifts?" You hummed, smiling up at him before glancing at his lips, "Maybe one or two."

"Yeah?"

"Yeah." You whispered back, pecking his lips.

"You might not know it but you've been touching your present all along." Harry chuckled, kissing your temple for a second before taking the box from under the covers.

"H, it's made a fucking lump. Of course I knew it was a present." You laughed, looking at the green wrapped box.

You unwrapped the box, Harry watching nervously and silently admiring how gentle you were while unwrapping the box. "Gucci!" You grinned, looking at him, "That's your favourite."

"I remember you telling me you like something of mine so," he shrugged.

You opened the box, "Loafers! You got me loafers!" You grinned, taking them out, "Are we going to be the cliché couple that match?"

"I think we're cliché enough to do that." Harry nodded. "There's something else in there."

You looked down, taking out the vinyl record in your hands, grinning when you read "Piano Man" and "Billy Joel".

“How on earth did you know I wanted this?"

"Might have had Farrah help me with that one." Harry smiled, shrugging sheepishly.

"You take your Christmas presents seriously, don't you?" You smiled, putting the shoes back in the box before wrapping your arms around his torso.

"Do you have any idea how hard picking a present for you is?" Harry rolled his eyes, groaning as he threw his head back.

"Hey, that goes both ways." You raised an eyebrow.

He laughed, raising his hand to push the hair that got on your face away, "You know what I got us for when we're back at my house? For our board games nights and all that?"

"And the Chinese takeaway?" You asked hopefully, making him chuckle and nod.

"And the Chinese takeaway," Harry confirmed, "I got us about 10 massive puzzle pieces."

You gasped, "You genius! I was actually thinking about getting us a new one."

"And now we have 10."

“And I have Gucci loafers.”

“And I have a wallet that looks like burnt toast.”

“Sorry about that, by the way. I didn’t know you took Christmas presents so seriously.” You sheepishly said, scrunching your nose as you looked up at him.

“Hey, none of that,” Harry frowned, “These are probably the nicest Christmas presents I have ever had. ‘sides,” he held up his wallet and new magnets, “What’s not serious about these babies?”

[boldlyvoid]

Amoreena | Chapter fourteen

Chapter fourteen

main summary: Heaven is a real place and it's located exactly 14.6 miles away from the FBI, Quantico Headquarters. Off behind a small park, under a fantastical willow tree surrounded by wildflowers, in every colour young minds can imagine.

Don't forget, heaven also comes with angels.

Chapter Warnings: talks of spencers major anxiety, parental death tw (not Diana or bob and Linda), trauma talks, computer hacking and new members joining the family...

word count: 4k

from the beginning <3

Taylors biggest surprise that weekend was what she had planned for Amoreena that night.

She set up a fort in the theatre room, they had every snack imaginable and any movie of her choice to watch. Karaoke in the corner, popcorn being popped in a theatre-style machine, and 3 different, matching child and adult, princess dresses for them to choose from.

It was all an elaborate plan to keep her preoccupied until bedtime, which Taylor offered to handle so that her parents could have a little wedding night date alone.

They’re all ready for a wonderful night when Spencer’s phone started ringing.

“Hello?” Spencer answers, sneaking away from the girls so he could hear better.

“Spencer, I am so sorry to interrupt you this late, but we have a situation… it’s not something that should be discussed over the phone. Do you have someone to watch Amoreena while you and Y/N come into the bureau? As soon as you can?”

His stomach drops, he feels instantly sick. “Not until you tell me who’s dead, who’s dying or who’s trying to kill us.”

“No one is, Spencer, it’s not a case or criminal related, it’s… personal, someone is here to see you,” she sounds serious and Spencer is still just as worried.

“I’ll tell the girls,” he responds before hanging up.

Y/N is standing right behind him, listening with wide eyes as she waits to soothe his panic. They worked like a well-oiled machine, she could physically feel his anxiety and in return, something about her just being there made him physically feel better.

“What’s wrong?” Taylor asks as she appears behind Y/N, Amoreena now off changing into one of the dresses she picked.

“They won't tell me on the phone but they need me and Y/N back at Quantico as soon as possible,” Spencer explained with a pale face, “we can go in the morning.”

“I’m fine watching Amoreena for the night, there’s a hanger down the road with a few of my dad’s planes, I can have someone take you to Virginia within the next hour? It's only 7 pm, I’m sure you can be back before bedtime?” Taylor offered her services for the 100th time that day, “It’s not a problem, really, and they wouldn’t call if it wasn’t serious, they’re the FBI after all.”

With that, they said goodbye to Amoreena and told her they’d be back before she woke up in the morning. If not, she had Y/N’s cellphone for the night to call them before she goes to sleep and when she wakes up, so she won't bother Taylor that early. (Even though Taylor said she wouldn’t mind early morning Amoreena cuddles.)

He was anxious on the drive to the small airport, the old man named Norman, chartering them that night was incredibly kind, they were granted lading access in Quantico and before he could prepare, they were up in the air. He chatted up a storm with Y/N on the headset radio as Spencer overthought the upcoming chat with JJ and stared out at the world below them.

On queue, he jumped from anxious to scared when they land, before getting in the shuttle from the airstrip to the front entrance, but he’s so incredibly terrified when it comes time to actually start the walk to the bullpen.

“Will you come in with me?” His small voice asks as she is pinning a visitors tag on her shirt.

“Of course,” she smiled, taking his hand as they walked into the elevator together.

He grips her hand tighter as the elevator stops, dipping and returning to the right height and making his stomach drop the same way a rollercoaster would. He hated that feeling more than anything, having it alongside the anxiety wasn’t helpful.

He can see JJ and another girl sitting together at his old desk. She’s smiling at whatever JJ says, she looks exactly like Amoreena just with box-dyed black hair that shines purple under the lighting. She’s in all black, she pushes her glasses up her nose with her sweater hiding her hands, Spencer knows she’s a foster kid from just her posture.

“JJ,” Spencer makes their presence clear and the little girl turns to him with a huge smile, running to him and wrapping her arms around his waist. “Hi?”

She’s sobbing ten and he doesn’t know why or even who she is, he lightly holds her with complete shock on his face. He stares at JJ with wide eyes and a gaping mouth as he communicates the confusion and terror with his eyes.

“This is Josephine Elliot, or Jo as she likes to be called, her parents passed away a few months ago and she recently found out her biological father was actually a sperm donor and not her moms husband,” JJ explains a little before sighing and sitting on the edge of the desk.

“She hacked into the sperm bank and found your name, and google led her to the FBI and they stopped her at the second gate, the first only let her in thinking she was your other daughter, Amoreena.”

“I’m so sorry,” the poor girl wipes her tears with her sweater sleeves, “I don’t know why I hugged you when you don’t even know me, ew sorry.”

Spencer pulls her back into a hug, “it’s okay, you don’t have to worry about wanting a hug ever again. You can have whatever you need from me.”

She cries more, holding on to his shirt as he holds her, shushing her softly and rubbing his hand over her back. It’s weird how safe she seems this early in their acquaintance with one another, but he understands it. She’s so desperate for someone related to her to love her again, to replace what she was missing from her parents, that she’s already accepted him as a father without thinking it through. Without even know what he would be like to her.

When she finally calmed down enough, Spencer led her towards the briefing room so they could have a moment alone to talk. He wanted to know her, and she needed to know him before she made another big decision. He let her know who he was, what he used to do and the rundown on his relationship with Y/N and Amoreena.

“So you met her at the park and got married a week later because you both have dead exes and somehow through fate, you made a kid together?” She summed it up in a way that made it sound ridiculous.

“Mutual trauma is a great bonding tool, I’m sure you probably listen to rock music or anything sad and angry because you know someone feels the exact same way you do? I was like that when I was a teenager. We've both lost someone we loved and then made Amoreena out of pure luck,” he combated her snarky summary with his own profile of her.

“I actually like Taylor Swift, Paramore, Evanescence and Olivia Rodrigo when I need to scream about being sad, thank you very much,” she teased him, finding a very easy rhythm as they got to know one another.

“You’re going to lose your mind when you find out who’s with Amoreena right now,” Spencer smiles, somehow everything just fits together.

“What?” She looks so confused, scrunching her face the same way he did to push her glasses up without her hands.

“It’s a long story, but essentially we were at Taylor Swift’s house when JJ called, she’s watching Amoreena still,” Spencer explained, watching her jaw drop.

“Who the fuck are you, dude?” She whispered, and it took Spencer by surprise. “Sorry, I’m so used to swearing in front of adults lately to get my point across. But seriously, you’re so interesting…”

“Understandable,” Spencer laughs lightly at her strange compliment. “I have a lot of connections, and I’ll do anything to see the people I love, smile, that includes you now.”

“You barely know me and you’re just ready to accept that I’m your kid? Didn’t this just happen to you last week?” She laughs at the insanity of it all, “you’re going to have a million kids at this rate, dude.”

Again, she calls him dude and he knows she’s just trying to distance her emotions as they grow fonder and fonder. A coping mechanism so that she doesn’t get hurt anymore, she’s lost too much and she’s not going to love him just to lose him too.

“My dad ran out on me when I was a kid, I basically raised myself when my mom’s schizophrenia got bad, I know what it’s like to feel alone even when you’re with people who are supposed to love you,” he makes sure she knows who he is inside.

“I’m sorry,” she reaches a hand out for him, holding it softly. “I never really liked my dad growing up, he always felt off… I can’t explain it, but he was never the same guy twice he was either angry, miserable or scarily happy," she explains him and all Spencer can think is how he sounds like an unsub.

"I do miss my mom a lot, I didn’t know what else to do when I found out they couldn’t have babies together and she went to a Sperm bank without telling him. I know the names of your other kids too, besides Amoreena, I’m really surprised you found her mom without hacking the system too but, yeah, Dylan is 6 and Alice is 10, they’re both in DC with the same 2 mom’s, so if you didn’t want me, I was going to see if they would cause I’m technically their stepdaughter in a weird way and if I spent one more day in that foster home I would have ended it all,” it's a Reid rant, she's his for sure.

It takes him a minute to absorb it all, “wait, Amoreena is mine for sure?”

She nods like it’s a stupid question, “could you not tell my just looking at her? The 3 of us have the same face.”

“No, they wouldn’t tell us at the clinic,” Spencer is still in shock but more so that she got into the database so easily, “how did you do it?”

“It was easy, I had all the information about the sample my mom used so I just encrypted an email to the secretary of the sperm bank so as soon as she clicked the link to read more I’d have access to her computer, they didn’t even know I was in the system, they probably still don’t know I was there,” she explains it exactly how Penelope would.

“I don’t want you to think I’d ever not want you,” Spencer holds her hand a little tighter, “I’m not sure what the process will be like trying to get the foster agency to agree to me taking you home with us, but I’ll see what I can do. We have a big house and enough room for you in our hearts if this is where you’d like to be. I’m not saying it’ll be easy, you might hate the farm life and the isolation and all the cousins you now have, but you’re a piece of me and I’m not letting you go.”

She uses her free hand to wipe her tears on her sleeve again, “please, I know it’s not going to be the same but I miss having a family so much.”

He wraps her up in his arms, he knows the feeling all too well. One day his mom was there, the next day she was gone and no one prepared him for that. She never had to do this alone, Spencer wasn’t going to let that happen to her.

“Y/N is wonderful, you’ll love her and Amoreena. We live on a huge farm and there’s a lot to do during the day and people to spend time with, believe me, you’re going to feel so surrounded by the love you won’t know what to do with it all,” he shares from personal experience.

“Okay,” she hugged him tighter, pressing her face into his neck as he talked more, feeling the vibrations of his voice on her forehead to know that he was real. That his words were true and she was going to be taken care of.

“Is there anything about yourself that you’d like me to know? Or any questions you have? I’m sure this is going to be an interesting adjustment,” Spencer asked as he pulled away, looking down into her sweet eyes and seeing the hope she was still hanging on to.

“Is Y/N even okay with all of this? It’s her house isn’t it?”

“I’m sure she’ll be fine with it, she knew I had you and the other 2 out there somewhere, we just never expected to meet you so soon,” he’s as honest as possible, talking to her the same way he would with Henry, she seemed even more mature than him.

“Can she come in here too? I’d like to get to know her as well, see if she’s really as lovely as you say she is,” she smiled, coping with her trauma the same way he and Y/N did, with humour.

Almost like Y/N could feel him thinking about her, she knocked on the door before opening it a crack, “sorry, I have some updates,” she smiled.

Josephine smiled at her, “come in.”

Y/N sat down close to her and placed her hand on her shoulder, “my sister is a foster parent, she called her caseworker and they were able to rush the emergency next of kin paperwork, you can stay with us for as long as you would like to.”

“You’re serious? You barely know me?” She kept repeating that as if she convinced herself earlier in the day that they wouldn’t want to know her.

Y/N wrapped her up in a soft hug and Spencer saw all the tension leave Josephines body as she settled against her. It had been a long time since a mother held her, she didn’t realize how much she needed it until she was in her arms.

“You’re half Spencer, so by default you have a portion of my heart now too. I’m not going to love you as an obligation or because I feel like I have to, I love you because you’re part of him and our family,” she whispers into her hair, “I know what it’s like to be alone, you never have to be... unless we’re smothering you then I get it, but you know what I mean.”

She laughed in Y/N’s arms before pulling back. Y/N held her face in her hands and looked at her gently. She ran her fingers through her dyed hair, “you’re going to fit right in with the 4 of us.”

“Four?” She repeats, wondering who else they lived with.

“I’m pregnant,” Y/N smiles as Josephine lights up.

“I’ve always wanted to be a big sister,” she cried a little, “my mom named me after Jo from Little Women, she said she always planned to give me lots of sisters.”

“If this one is a girl she’ll be Eleonora like—“

“Like the poem, Edgar Allan Poe is one of my favourites,” Jo smiled again.

Somehow, without even being there, Amoreena’s mess of glitter glue was able to patch her older sister's broken heart right then and there too.

“I read really fast, my mom said she was going to go bankrupt buying books for me,” she opened up more and more, the hurt of the memories fading as she remembered them with happiness instead of mourning.

Her mom was gone, but the love of a mother filled her space once more. Y/N took her under her wing, keeping her warm and making sure he grew to be as happy healthy and wonderful as all her other babies.

—

They arrive at Taylor's door once again at 11:30. Amoreena is sound asleep in the spare room, not even able to change out of her princess costume or phone them to say goodnight. Taylor said she had a sugar crash and just asked to go to sleep, reminding Taylor that she had the best day ever before closing her tired little eyes.

Jo was very anxious to meet Taylor too, telling her a similar story to Y/N’s from just a few hours prior. Taylor made sure she was comfortable for the night in another spare room, making her a hot chocolate and some snacks from earlier that day at lunch. She was the best host, a wonderful friend and an even better honorary godparent to these girls of Spencer’s.

“Can I have a hug?” She sheepishly asks before she has to turn down the hall to her bedroom for the night.

Spencer answers by wrapping his arms around her and holding her close to his chest once more, he wasn’t sure how his heart could hold so much love for these girls, and still have room left to make more one day. It was a dream come true to have a family this big, no one was going to believe that he gained 3 kids and a wife in under a month.

He kissed her on the forehead gently, seeing her smile at the contact let him know it was fine. “Goodnight dad,” she whispers, pressing her lips together awkwardly the same way he did before turning down the hall and disappearing into her room.

She had only a backpack of things currently, not expecting everything to go as smoothly as it did. She had enough clothes to sleep in, and Taylor happily provided some old tour perch to her just in case she needed something new to wear. Something to help her ease to sleep that didn’t feel like she was going back to her old life in the morning.

Amoreena was going to have a field day tomorrow when she met her big sister, the beautiful girl who was busy covering her scars with bandaids provided by Spencer, but it would take a lot of time, effort and care to make her feel truly healed again. It was going to be interesting seeing Amoreena adjust to sharing him so early, especially since he knew Jo would need so much more attention to ease her anxiety moving forward.

Spencer sat on the guest bed beside Y/N, noticing all the rose petals and candles on the dresser and night tables, “oh she really had a lot planned for us.”

“She’s the fairy godmother of our dreams,” Y/N agreed with a laugh. “I don’t mind staying up late tonight if you don’t mind leaving on Monday instead?”

“I was going on suggest the same thing,” he smiled at her, leaning in to press their lips together gently for the first time since the wedding that afternoon.

“let's get into our comfy’s and go for a walk on the beach, Taylor left me the keys to lock up when we come back,” she whispered the words against his lips before smiling.

“Can I call Derek before we go? I really need to talk to him,” he’s honest with her as he pulls away, feeling really anxious and shook up at the events of the day. He needed his best friend.

“Yeah, I’ll go check out the rest of the guest house, come find me when you’re done?” She says softly, getting off the bed with a smile and stepping out of the room with a small wave.

He takes his phone out and dials the number, waiting with the phone pressed against his ear as it rings. Again and again, every new hum in his ear making his heart beat faster, “hello?” He’s finally rescued.

“Have you talked to anyone on the team lately?”

“Who died?” It was everyone’s go-to question when they got a phone call like this one.

“No one, quite the opposite actually—“

“She’s pregnant!” Derek shouts, cutting him off and Spencer can hear Savannah asking who from the background.

“Well, yeah, but that’s not why I'm calling,” Spencer replies only to be met with Derek's laughter.

“Penny and I had a bet on how long it would take.”

“She cheated because she knew we were trying,” Spencer takes the fun from him, Penelope always won. “I have another kid.”

“I know man, birth is so cool— well I’m telling him anyway,” Derek is clearly talking to Savannah and him at the same time, “we’re pregnant again too.”

“No, Derek, I’m pregnant and sick as hell while you’re perfectly fine,” she snaps back at him as she takes the phone. “You better be so kind to her Doctor Spencer Reid; rub her feet, make her breakfast, thank every god on earth and the ground she walks on for being willing to make another version of you, do you hear me?”

“Yes ma’am,” Spencer hold back a laugh, wondering when Y/N would have a hormonal switch like that, “but I didn’t mean the one in her stomach, another fully formed human of my creation walked into the BAU looking for me today.”

There’s a rustling through the phone as Derek takes it back from her, “what the fuck did you just say?”

“Her name is Jo, she’s exactly a month younger than Henry and her parents died 7 months ago,” he continues without even repeating the last part, “Derek I have 3 kids now and I don’t know what I’m doing.”

“Where are you right now?”

“In Taylor Swift's guest house.”

“Spencer, be serious with me, are you doing drugs again?"

“Ask Penelope, she contacted Portia, Rossi’s stepdaughter, who contacted Taylor so I could help Y/N and Amoreena meet her, then JJ called and made us fly all the way to Quantico and now I have 2 children living with me and one on the way. Not to mention, child 1 is extremely jealous about sharing me with people and hasn’t even gotten accustomed to being a big sister, and child 2 is so traumatized she hacked the fucking sperm bank and explained it to me like it was as easy as making a sandwich. I am in over my head here, Derek.”

“Okay, that sounded more like Spencer Reid,” Derek’s calm and happy voice calms him slightly and prompts him to take a deep breath. “If she’s able to hack she’s most likely like Penelope, we can introduce them. She’ll need someone who understands the loss of a parent. Amoreena, on the other hand, you need to spend a day with just her. Take her to the movies, or to see a play or something. Let her know she’s always going to be your little girl no matter how many siblings she gets.”

“Thank you, I needed someone who wasn’t my overly optimistic wife to tell me if I could do it,” he’s overly honest, Derek is his person and will always be his person.

“I get it, thanks for calling me, I’m really glad you’re okay,” he can hear Derek's smile and all he wants is a hug from him. “How was the wedding?”

“Good, we all cried a lot,” he laughs then, “we were supposed to have a big dinner on the beach before we got called into Quantico, so I’m going to go spend time with her now, I love you, Derek,” he rushes the words out so he doesn’t get overly emotional.

“I love you too, Spencer, have a good night,” Derek hands up before they both get too emotional. They always had a knack for making the other cry in times like this.

He lets out a deep sigh before tossing his phone on the bedside table. 3 of his 5 kids were here with him and Y/N now, safe and sound. If anyone else needed him, they could wait.

tag list: @shemarmooresfedora @spencers-dria @spookyspence @reidsfish @manuosorioh @mochionly @samuel-de-champagne-problems @jswessie187

@k-k0129

[doodle--writes]

Temptations- Adult Eddie Kaspbrak X Reader

Word Count: 2968

Warnings: Cursing, smut, alcohol

Request: Hello! I was wondering if I could request a smut for adult Eddie Kaspbrak please? Maybe where the reader is a member of the losers club and her and Eddie had crushes on each other when they were younger and those feelings came back when they met up again at the restaurant. Maybe have it be set towards the end of the film and Eddie survives and figures what the hell and just gives into his feelings. Thank you so much in advance! ☺️

___

When Mike had called, you were in the middle of teaching a lesson to your fourth period class. At first, you had let the phone buzz in your purse. The second time, you let it buzz again. The third time, you sighed, just throwing the answer key to the previous night's assignment under the ELMO to let the kids check their own work.

You pulled out your phone and answered. "Hello Ms. L/N speaking- if you'd please call at a later time- I'm in the middle of a lesson."

"Y/N, it's Mike."

The class had gone quiet so they could try and hear your conversation. You gave them all a slightly scolding yet somewhat amused look as you stepped out of the classroom. Outside, you spotted a teacher with her plan period across the hall.

You hurried over, phone still near your face but not quite pushed against it.

"Hey Diana," you smiled nervously, "can you take my class for a few minutes? They're juniors, it shouldn't be much trouble."

Seeing you had your phone, she nodded with a small smile and wordlessly stepped into the classroom.

You started walking towards the teacher work room and put the phone back to your ear. "Hello, yes, I'm sorry about that. I had to leave my classroom," you sighed. You lightly shook your head and forced a smile although the mystery man on the other side of the line wouldn't be able to see it. "So, I don't believe I know a Mike. Are you sure this isn't the wrong Y/N?"

"I'm positive. It's Mike Hanlon, from Derry. We used to be friends."

"I-" you paused, something starting to poke at your memory. You began to walk a bit faster, heels clicking viciously against the tile floor. "You were homeschooled weren't you? Had a little farm?"

"There we go. You remember."

"Yeah I do," you hummed softly, now wondering why on earth he was calling you after... how long? ... 27 years?

"It's back."

When you woke up, you were laying on a sickbed in the school infirmary, your legs just barely fitting on it. You moved your legs to the floor and sat up. The room spun a bit but it slowed down after a few moments.

You didn't remember much after that other than the pain as you collapsed in the middle of the hallway and hushed but panicked voices nearing.

_____

A few footsteps shuffled in and began to bombard you with questions over whether or not you were alright. Truthfully, you weren't and you'd say you weren't, but with a totally different explanation.

"Oh you see, I had a family emergency. My mom... she..." You struggled to come up with an excuse since your mother had passed away about a decade prior.

Luckily, one of the staff members, Diana from earlier, changed the subject. "How many days do you need off?"

The flight and arrival in Derry was all blurred to you. You were shocked you had managed to function like an actual human being. Or at least you thought you did; you couldn't say for certain.

"Maybe a week," you smiled small, but you hoped, you prayed it was less.

_____

Although as you entered the Jade Orient, part of your sanity seemed to return. You were clearheaded as you talked to the hostess, mentioning that you were there for a party of eight.

She gestured back towards a seating area that was blocked off by a wooden screen. You were hesitant to enter, there was no doubt about that, but you stepped in and gave a sigh of relief. There was no jump scare or moment of shock; just faces you knew that had aged over the years.

Mike and Bill were engrossed in a conversation that made both of their eyes light up. You overheard something about Bill's writing- oh yeah Bill was a famous writer now- and Mike's library.

Now, the other two were antithetical in comparison; Richie and Eddie were sitting across from each other, making fun of each other, bantering.

You smiled to yourself. Just like old times.

Richie was in the middle of a 'your mom' joke before he looked up and whistled. "Oh damn who is that thiccums over there?"

Working with high school students, you knew exactly what that meant and you turned red, shaking your head, but unable to stop smiling. "Keep it in your pants Richard." You held your arms out to hug him. "But get your ass over here and give me a hug."

Richie nearly leaped from his seat, tripping over his gangly legs, and wrapped his equally long arms around you.

It felt weird having Richie, who used to be shorter than you, stand above six foot and hug you so tightly, but it felt nice.

After he pulled away, he laughed. "Shit, you're showing me up. I got the dad bod and here you are with childbearing hips and an itty bitty waist."

You laughed embarrassedly. "Oh Richie you're flattering me."

You turned back towards the table, ready to speak but you stopped yourself. Staring at you was a slender but sharp face with inquisitive eyes as big as a Disney princess. His nose had sharpened in angles over the years but very faintly you could see familiar freckles from sunshine trailing over both cheeks and his nose.

He smiled at you and you smiled back, feeling the heat of a childhood crush fill your cheeks. "Hi Eddie."

He was up on his feet in an instant, pulling you close and into a hug that was almost too tight. Just almost. Yet you found your embarrassment fading and your cockiness growinf. "Miss me that much?"

He pulled away almost immediately, rambling over how it was "so amazing to see you" and how you "grew up to look exactly like your mother".

You rolled your eyes but your smile stayed as you went to squish his cheeks. "And you haven't changed at all," you cooed.

And you drank. Richie drank. Bill drank. Mike drank. Even Eddie, who had scolded you once or twice for underage drinking, drank to the point of delight.

He lightly pushed your hand away before you turned to the rest of the group, laughing. "I don't know about you guys, but I need a drink!"

______

When Ben and Bev arrived, they joined the festivities.

You didn't quite remember how, but you ended up in Eddie's lap, giggling, feeling like a teenager again. He felt the same as he had an arm lazily wrapped around your waist.

He kept his arm there as he walked you back to the townhouse; neither of you felt like it was suitable to drive back with how drunk you were.

The walk upstairs was jovial as you swung your hands together and laughed even though no jokes were told.

But the air changed once you had reached the top. Eddie's bedroom was closest and you weren't sure if he dragged you in or if you had pulled him in, but that didn't matter at all.

As soon as the door was closed, arms were wrapped snug around your waist, a chest surprisingly tough pressed against yours.

Eddie was staring at you, mouth barely agape, breathless. Inside he was panicking some but God he knew he wanted this.

"Tell me to stop," he warned.

You returned his look, but yours carried a smugness to it; like you were confident in the first place that things would go accordingly.

"Don't you dare stop."

With that, Eddie's mouth slammed against yours in a way that threw you off guard entirely. Eddie, as long as you had known him, had been somewhat pristine. Sure, he could be as loud as Richie and much angrier, and he was no Stan, but Eddie always had a neatness to him.

So to see him do something so intense, so sloppy took your breath away.

You kissed him back with a similar if not equal force that made your lips tingle and burn.

Your arms planted themselves around his neck; your hands grasped onto fistfuls of hair just as soft and thick as it had been before Eddie even hit puberty.

Eddie pulled away slightly, your lips maybe a centimeter apart, foreheads pressed together. "Maybe we should move this to the bed?" He phrased it more so as a question than a statement.

You nearly agreed, but you remembered something. "Eddie, we can't. You're married." You pulled your arms away from him and stepped back. "I don't care if your marriage isn't going well. I don't want to be the one to make you cheat." You looked to the ground, feeling as if you had sobered up.

Eddie stepped back a foot and tried to look anywhere that wasn't you. "Y-yeah, right. Sorry, I think I drank too much."

"I did too." You slowly made your way closer to the door before you told him, "have a good night, Eddie."

The following hours and days, you weren't exactly sure how long the process of killing a demon clown was, were grueling. Yet, all of you made it.

He mumbled something in return, but you didn't hear it because you were already down the hall.

_____

Yes, there were extremely terrifying moments that made you feel like you pissed yourself. Like when: Bill nearly drowned in water, Richie got put in the deadlights, Mike tried to get you all to do a ritual that killed the original casters, Ben had more shit carved into his stomach, Bev nearly drowned in blood, Eddie was stabbed in the fucking face, and you nearly suffocated at one point.

You took joy in watching the house on Neibolt Street collapse into itself. That house that had haunted you for nearly three decades was finally gone.

You looked around at your friends. Everyone was dirty and covered in blood of their own or even someone else's. "Hey guys," you began, "how about we go swimming?"

A small chorus of delayed and tired 'yeah's followed. All of you walked through town, ignoring those who looked at you like you were insane.

About halfway there, Eddie squirmed his way next to you and reached out for your hand.

After the quarry, you all went back to the townhouse, deciding to rest up before you'd all inevitably leave Derry once again. Only this time, you wouldn't forget. You'd remember your friends and go on in life with them as your friends.

You let him.

___

Quietly, you walked to your room and as soon as you could, you took a long shower. You took great care in getting all of the blood and dirt off of your skin. You washed beneath your nails. You spent time carefully working the knots out of your hair.

Once you were out, you walked to your luggage, going through it for anything comfortable. You wondered if you had left some things from a previous trip inside because you did not remember packing lingerie.

You thought about it for a moment before saying fuck it and you put on the lingerie with a small satin robe over it.

Just as you tied the robe, a knock came on the door. "Y/N, may I come in?" It was Eddie's voice.

"Yeah come on in, Eddie," you called, going to sit on the end of your bed.

Eddie carefully opened the door, and peeked his head inside before he completely appeared. You noted that he was wearing gray sweatpants and a white t-shirt. You had never seen Eddie in sweats before and you weren't complaining at the change.

Eddie's cheeks went red at the sight of you but he sat next to you nonetheless.

"So I called it off with Myra."

Those were not at all the words you expected.

"Woah Eddie, I'm sorry." You reached out to put your hand on his shoulder.

He sighed and turned toward you. "This week made me realize something. Well, more accurately, it made me remember something." He takes one of your hands between his own. "I care for you more than anyone else. You make me laugh, you make smile, you make me brave. You do all these things to me and I know what that means. I think I've known since we were kids." He looks into your eyes. "I love you."

You practically tackled Eddie, knocked him back onto the mattress and kissed him. It was a soft kiss, but it lingered as you cupped his non injured cheek with your hand. "I love you too Eddie. So much."

You kissed him again, slightly harder this time and planted yourself to where you were straddling him.

It didn't take long for you to feel something underneath you. Just the thought of it was enough to drive you crazy.

Just like Eddie had said once before, you looked down at him and said, "tell me to stop."

He quickly shook his head. He wanted this even though he wasn't exactly sure what all of this entailed.

You leaned down to kiss him once again before dragging your lips down to his jaw. You found a spot that made his breath hitch in his throat and decided to mark it, gently biting and sucking until you left a deep purple mark there.

Eddie groaned before switching gears. You were the one laying on your back as Eddie kneeled between your legs. "Can we get this robe off?"

You leaned up a little before untying the robe and tossed it to the floor.

Eddie took a moment to stare at you. You wore baby doll lingerie; essentially a type of intimate nightgown that's usually see through.

That's exactly how yours was. He could see your nipple starting to poke at the fabric, stretching it.

He reached down and gently squeezed your chest, earning a shaky breath. He moved to cup your breast, his thumb tracing your nipple. You whined a bit at the feeling of lace scratching over it and the feeling of Eddie's hand.

It had admittedly been quite a while since you had the touch of someone other than your own hand or a Hitachi so you felt extremely sensitive.

In a swift movement, Eddie pulled the fabric away from your chest entirely and replaced his thumb with his tongue. You moaned quietly as he began to work on your chest. His hand found its way to your other breast.

Your legs tried to clench but Eddie sat between them and once he felt that, he moved his attention downwards.

He moved back and grabbed the waistband of your panties. He looked at you. "May these come off?"

You nodded. "Yes take them off. Please."

He gingerly slid them down your legs before tossing them onto your robe.

He leaned down between your legs but didn't use his mouth yet. Instead, he tested the waters with one finger, first rubbing your clit, which earned a whine. Then he stuck a finger in to see exactly how needy you were. The answer? Very.

Eddie began to methodically finger you while his tongue flicked against your clit repeatedly. Just knowing that Eddie was the one doing it made your heart beat fast and your head dizzy.

"Eddie," you moaned, "more."

With that, Eddie added a second finger and began to curl them inside of you, earning a somewhat loud gasp. You put your hand over your mouth, fully aware that Richie's room was the next one over and man you did not want that conversation tomorrow morning.

It didn't take long for you to tangle your fingers in Eddie's hair and chant his name. He ate you out more viciously, his fingers pumping in and out at a rate that made you dripping wet.

When your orgasm came, you bucked your hips up, moaned into your hand, and squirted. Luckily Eddie was out of the way by that point. You knew how he was about bodily fluids but he didn't seem to mind right then.

He leaned down and kissed you. You were much more eager in the kiss as you tried to get over the high of your orgasm. He whispered praises into your ear and after a moment, you switched it over again.

Now Eddie was beneath you as you slid his sweats and boxers down in one swoop.

You looked at Eddie. "Do you care whether or not we use a condom?"

He shook his head, surprising himself. "Not at all."

You whispered a small "thank god" before lining yourself up with him. You slid down onto him with a lewd mew.

Eddie's hands found themselves on your hips, lightly squeezing. A nearly lightheaded feeling washed over you, but you admittedly wanted more.

You brought your hips back up before sliding down onto his cock again, making both of you groan.

You rested your hands on his chest as both of you whimpered and groans at each slap of your thighs against his torso.

It felt like an embarrassingly short time before your thighs tried to clench around him.

It felt embarrassing for him as well once he began to feel the coil in his stomach tighten.

You came with a rather pornographic moan and your walls tightened around Eddie. The sensation was enough to finish him off, making him cum.

Breathlessly, sex drives and overall shape not as great as it used to be, the both of you lay down.

You find yourself cuddling into Eddie's chest as one of his legs lazily lays over your own.

Eddie sighs happily. "Well that's like a wet dream come true."

You giggle. "And one hell of a way to start a relationship."

Eddie smiles softly. "I love you."

"I love you too."

[elisaphoenix13]

Sugar Rush

Tony had no idea what he was walking into when the elevator doors opened at the family floor. Chaos was the first word that came to mind but it was a good kind of chaos. All of the kids were sitting around the table decorating cookies, some of the avengers were as well, and the rest were roaming the kitchen helping make the cookies. The engineer wanders over to Stephen who was adding ingredients to the mixing bowl, and kisses his cheek before wiping away a smear of flour on the sorcerer's opposite cheek.

"Honey, you have-"

"You're wasting your time. They'll just put some back." Stephen interrupts and Tony raises an eyebrow after he wipes the flour away.

"Who will?"

Quill swipes his fingers through the flour on the counter and spreads it on Stephen's cheek as he passes by to grab more cookies. He whistles as he takes the baked goods over to the decorating table and Stephen gives Tony a look that clearly said 'I told you'.

"Clint started it and I gave up after the third attempt to get my face clean." He elaborates as he adds sugar to the mixer.

Tony chuckles. "Who are your flour attackers?"

"Clint, Nat, Harley, and now Quill."

"What's the occasion?" The engineer asks as he adds another swipe of flour to his wife's face who sighs in feigned annoyance.

"Diana wanted to make cookies that she could decorate and it turned into this."

Tony looks back around the kitchen and dining area at their friends and family and smiles softly as he watches Peter smear some frosting onto Cassie's cheek, Nat and Steve eating a finished cookie while laughing about something, Quill...well it was really no surprise to find him periodically smear icing onto Scott's face before licking it off as he helped bring cookies yet to be decorated to the table, Laura and Wanda helping to keep the dining table clear of the decorated cookies, and so on and so forth. Clint and Sam were tossing candy into each other's mouths, and Bucky helping Stephen with the baking bit.

The rest of the team, like Natasha and Steve, we're enjoying the cookies and having conversations. Stephen did at one point subconsciously wipe the flour off of his face, and immediately, Sam stopped throwing candy at Clint to do what Quill did not two minutes before. Stephen didn't even bother making any kind of verbal complaint.

"You were looking too clean there Mama Bear." The Falcon says with a smirk and Stephen rolls his eyes.

"We can't have that." He says as he takes the dough out of the mixer and sets it on the floured counter in front of Vision who starts using cookie cutters on it.

While he did that, Stephen put the bowl in the sink and gathered the dirty dishes that were no longer being used so he could wash them. Tony grabs the ingredients and helps put those away, purposely keeping the flour out, and wipes down the counters, avoiding Vision's workspace of course. When that was done, he took over washing the dishes when he noticed Stephen's hands trembling more than usual and kisses the man's cleaner cheek.

"Go eat a cookie. I'll put some water on the stove so you can have tea." Tony says softly and Stephen nods before walking over and taking the empty seat next to Nathaniel.

At the mention of tea, Wanda switched over to the duty of making Stephen his tea as she was one of the very few who could make it correctly, and Cooper offered up a decorated cookie to Stephen. The sorcerer takes it with gratitude and a smile, and watches the kids and a couple of the Avengers decorate some cookies. Happy surprisingly was roped into the shenanigans as well, Diana sitting in his lap decorating a cookie with purple icing as the bodyguard conversed with Rhodey, and then Pepper arrived. She walks over to Tony with a manila envelope and then looks around once the engineer stacks the last of the dishes and dries his hands to take the envelope.

"Fun day?" She asks and Tony shrugs.

"It was all the princess's idea. Sit down and have a cookie."

Pepper smiles. "I have a few minutes to spare."

She walks over to the table, greeting Diana with a kiss on the top of her head before reaching over to Stephen to wipe away the flour on his cheek.

"Stephen, you had-" The flour was barely cleaned off when Steve stepped in to reapply the flour.

Stephen props his chin in his hand and raises his eyebrows at Pepper's appalled expression. "I am well aware of the flour. Thank you though."

"I can see that now." Pepper says with a giggle. "Make sure Tony gets that paperwork done by Wednesday please?"

"Of course."

"Here Auntie Pepper!" Diana holds up the cookie she just finished, thankfully not drowning in frosting.

"Thank you sweetie." Pepper takes the cookie and looks back at Stephen before reaching out toward his clean cheek. "They got you here too."

Stephen furrows his brows. "They didn't-"

The sorcerer freezes when Pepper pulls away with a smirk, and Peter looks over at him before howling with laughter. Everyone looks to see what has the teen in hysterics and they burst into laughter when they find a dark blue smear of icing on Stephen's cheek. Pepper grabs a second cookie as she says goodbye, and disappears onto the elevator as the sorcerer wipes the icing off. Scott only attacked with green frosting to replace it.

"I hate you all." Stephen grumbles and gladly accepts the tea Wanda brings over for him.

"Green is fitting." She says and the doctor ignores her.

The next couple of hours pass with the same usual attempts to slyly clean his face, only to have someone jump in and replace whatever had been cleaned, and he gave up again until later. All the cookies were decorated, things were put away, and the kitchen cleaned as everyone retired into the living room to continue their day with some movies. That was when Stephen could finally clean his face and stay clean and settled onto one of the couches next to Tony. Or more like laid across Tony's lap with his head on the armrest and his feet across Rhodey's lap. He purred when his husband gently ran his fingers through his hair, and they waited as everyone settled onto the floor or the couches.

Halfway through the first movie, Tony noticed some of them started to doze off and he soon figured out it was because of Quill. The celestial actually had a sugar crash and had fallen asleep, and his snoring started up, but it of course came out sounding like an overgrown cat purring. Scott, of course, was one of the first to pass out as he was sitting back against Quill, but it wasn't just soothing to Scott and Cassie, it was soothing to pretty much everyone. So not only did they have Stephen with his calming scent of tea leaves and incense, but now they had Quill's soothing purrs.

This family was insane.

Tony grabs Clint's empty beer can and chucks it at the pirate's head, who jolts into awareness. "Wake up Porcupine! You're putting everyone to sleep!"

"Sorry." Quill responds drowsily and everyone that had been dozing off shakes their heads and returns their attention to the movie.

"Tony." Stephen whispers, and the engineer grabs the sorcerer's trembling hands when he holds them up in a silent plea, gently working them over.

The lull over everyone soon breaks when movies turn into games, and everyone was pretty competitive. Stephen and Tony were content to watch at first, especially when the first game ended up being Uno. At the moment, Peter was looking terrified, and Quill was looking smug.

"Dude, please don't! You still haven't made up for sticking a gun to my head!"

"Are you still on that?"

"It was extremely traumatizing to hear the stupid things come out of your mouth too."

Quill narrows his eyes and immediately places a plus four in the discard pile. "Just for that I'm definitely doing it. Draw four, punk."

Peter grumbles and draws four cards, and the many people playing quickly make their turn until it gets back to Quill, who gives Peter another smug grin. Another plus four is placed on the table and Peter gawks. "OH COME ON!"

Quill laughs as the teen draws four cards yet again, and a reverse war temporarily breaks out between Cassie and Sam.

"You know, I liked that move so much, I'm gonna let you go again." Sam says as he puts down a red reverse.

"That's nice, but you can go." Cassie puts down a blue one.

"Seriously, I insist." Sam puts down another red one and Harley screeches after the third repeat.

"How many of those do you have?!"

After the two hour game of Uno, a game that Lila won, they moved on to Twister. The coffee table and couches pushed aside, the mat laid out, and those not currently participating surrounding it. They could only go four people at a time and right now the four were Natasha, Scott, Harley, and Wanda.

They were all really good at it and Quill actually had to excuse himself to the balcony when he saw how flexible Scott really was. Under normal circumstances he would have just dragged the man away, but it was a day of team bonding and there were innocent eyes. Tony mercilessly teased the god of course. Harley was the first to fall, and Wanda followed shortly after, but the game kept going for another ten minutes until Scott finally caved and returned to his wheezing husband's side. Quill was being a little overdramatic, but Tony teasing him certainly wasn't helping.

"It's a little unnerving to see how flexible some of our friends are." Stephen says and Tony looks over at him with a wicked grin.

"It's too bad you can't play. Everyone would see how Mama Bear can bend."

Stephen blushes hotly. "Tony! There are children!"

Twister was played for a couple more hours until the kids retired to bed and the adults could bring out the alcohol and the adult games. The adult game being the usual Never Have I Ever, and both Stephen and Scott were convinced they were being ganged up on.

"Never have I ever...given a handjob under a table." Natasha says and not only did Scott and Stephen take a drink, but so did Tony, Quill, and Laura.

"Never have I ever done it in a secluded corner where anyone could walk in and see me." Sam says and everyone stares at Scott and Quill when they take a drink.

Tony holds up his hand. "Hang on...when and where was this?"

Scott covers his face and Quill shrugs. "The last gala."

"Wait...was that power outage your fault?" Clint asks and Quill answers with a grin, causing Tony to burst into laughter.

"Just to make Quill drink again, never have I ever lost control of my powers." Wanda says with a smirk.

Quill wasn't the only one to take a drink.

So did Stephen.

Scott stares. "Wait...what did you do?"

Stephen looks away with a blush. "I may have broken the light bulbs in our lamps and set our curtains on fire."

Rhodey was actually the one to laugh. "Damn Mama Bear."

"Don't forget the part that you somehow managed to blow out the power to the tower." Tony says and Quill raises his hand.

"Actually, that was me."

[amphtaminedreams]

S/S 2020 Fashion Month: A Basic, Uneducated Fashion Heaux’s A-Z of Everything Noteworthy (Part 2/3)

Hi to anyone reading,

Back at it again with the giving my unsolicited opinion on 2020′s spring/summer offering, I’m gonna hop straight into part 2 of my fashion month review!

Sorry to start with an underwhelming few but my compulsive tendencies are making it really hard to break out of this alphabetical structure (cry laughs whilst thinking about how long it took me to face up at my retail job last night because it would give me vaguely homicidal urges and make my fingers tingle every time a customer moved something slightly out of line), so I’m gonna whizz through a handful of collections. First up, Halpern:

Not much to say but I’m envious of the heavy liner (my hooded eyes could never) and I like the colour scheme. As for the 80s style metallic pink dress?

Helmut Lang:

And Hermes:

Of these 3 collections, Hermes is definitely the most interesting. I like the colour scheme and the utilitarian shapes and the tan coloured jackets are an absolute shoot. This is how you make safari look fresh, D&G take note.

Isabel Marant was okay. It’s cute, sure, reminds me of something Mary-Kate and Ashley would’ve come out with/worn in the 2000s, and there’s definitely some things I would wear, but I wouldn’t say it looks all that luxury. Pricey, sure, but like, Free People pricey, not designer pricey. As a collection, it’s not all that conceptual, unless the concept is L.A girl does a Starbucks run after her bikram yoga class. What I will say though is that some of the S/S 2020 commercial trends are becoming clear: white cheesecloth pieces, peasant blouses, cowboy boots, scrappy sandals, neutral tones, and bandana print. 

Now onto the darling of high fashion Twitter: Jacquemus.

As far as presentation goes, this has to be one of my favourite set-ups of the season; a hot pink runway running through a lavender meadow is as canny and serene as those who sing the praises of Simon Porte Jacquemus would have you expect, and the clothes were easy, breezy and beautiful, even if there is an element of getting dressed in the dark going on with the styling which put me off including a few otherwise gorgeous pieces. It might not be 100% my style but you can tell this is a brand of the future which is only going to go from strength to strength.

And everything was beautifully and purposefully crafted on the runway with J.W Anderson this year. The pieces are graceful and timeless whilst still easy to envision as something a modern woman would throw on to (very fashionably) run some errands in the city. This was also one of the handful of shows (IIRC! This might be a case of extreme deja-vu!) where we saw the sandal straps tied over the trousers, I’m guessing to accentuate the ankles, and...I’m surprisingly here for it? Though in a sense it kinda resembles when I accidentally get my work trousers tucked into my slipper socks, it’s an interesting touch and adds a bit of a shape to otherwise billowing bottom halves.

Following Jacquemus’ lead (or vice versa, I’m way too deep into this fashion month haze to work out who went first at this point), Lacoste also put on a co-ed show. Otherwise crisp and preppy as per, the neckerchiefs (even if seeing them all next to one another does give off a bit of a Disneyland Main Street barbershop quartet vibe) and vinyl/wet-look/PVC/I’m still not sure what differentiates the 3 coats were an out of the box touch for them and I really liked it. It’s athleisure, but more like something Hayley Bieber would’ve worn as part of her Princess Diana inspired shoot than anything I’d wear to the gym.

LMAO, as if I go the gym. But you get my point. Next, Loewe:

Delicate, feminine and all around delightful, the S/S 2020 Loewe collection is up there with Chloe and Brock when it comes to most spring appropriate. More chiffon, lace and doily-like detailing, please, the old woman in me lives for this kinda thing made fashionable. Like with J.W Anderson, you can tell the design team wanted to do something different without just throwing shit onto their pieces for the sake of being wacky, and so we end up with these dramatic, slightly geometric waistlines and almost angelic Victorian nightgown inspired dresses that kinda make me wished that 1). ghosts existed and that 2). I lived back in that era so I could die some tragic death wearing any one of the dresses on the left in the top 3 rows and then haunt the shit out of everyone. That would really be an iconic fashion moment. Also wonderful, imo, was Louis Vuitton:

The mix between 60s and Edwardian I never knew I needed, as opposed to Gucci’s forward thinking take on the former decade, Louis Vuitton takes it back even further and throws in late 19th/early 20th century structures and references. I adore the what seems to be a mix between brocade and paisley print and the exaggerated collars are a very cute touch. The jacket on the top left is a highlight, a more neutral version of the similar catsuit seen at the Longchamp show (I couldn’t personally pick enough highlights from that to include it), and I now more than ever really want to try and pull off a sweater vest. The shoes might not be the most exciting thing ever but they’re also a personal favourite, from the knee high boots to the loafers with the LV moniker.

Maison Margiela was very cool and again, I’m in love with the shoes and just the accessories in general, ESPECIALLY those hats. I don’t know if I’m way off base here but this show is almost a modernised, fashionable version of a 1940s period drama about WW2 pilots and evacuees. Yes, maybe I am just getting that solely from the trench coats and the naval influences and the exaggerated collars but I think with that list I made quite a case for that perspective, right? Right.

And completing this holy trinity (appropriating the term I usually reserve for Emma Watson, Emma Stone and Emma Roberts is not without careful consideration) is Marc Jacobs. One of my ultimate favourites of this season, this collection is absolutely EVERYTHING: kitschy, dream-like, whimsical, over-the-top, and totally appropriate for your slightly eccentric aunt who always drinks too much wine and talks a lot of shit every time she comes over for dinner. I really feel like I walked into wonderland looking at this collection, and in the best way possible, it gives me a female Russell Brand in the 2000s’ wardrobe on crack. On the one hand we have these insanely beautiful and ethereal chiffon floral dresses but then we also have fricken top hats. Basically, it’s everything I love about fashion and I don’t know if anything can top it. Periodt (and I type that with a totally straight face). 

Next, onto another personal fave, Marchesa:

Which is as always, beautiful. I was going to write that if Disney princesses came to life and lived in the modern world (so, in other words, Elle Fanning), they would be wearing Marchesa and then I remembered that the film Enchanted exists and had a lightbulb moment and thought OH MY GOD IF THEY REMADE THAT IN 2019, THE DRESS ON THE RIGHT IN THE MIDDLE ROW WOULD BE A PERFECT LEVELLING UP OF THE CURTAIN DRESS.

Anyways, favourites of the favourites are the bottom row; I would die for that feather trim. 

BUT where Marchesa is everything opulent, overly ornate and err-ing on “fussy”, Margaret Howell’s S/S 2020 collection is completely stripped back and just as effective, if not as to my taste. Very cool, very current, and altogether effortless (in a good way!), with this show Margaret Howell made mid-20th century utilitarianism relevant. I never thought I’d be praising the combination of bermuda shorts, crew socks and a beanie and yet here I am. Character development.

Next is Marine Serre:

Which I really like! The bottom row isn’t really to my personal taste but I can acknowledge that if I saw somebody wearing any one of those outfits I’d think they looked sick, and as for the first two rows, those mesh tops and the slightly chintzy florals are right up my alley.

Marques Almeida put out a really strong collection, imo. The blending of luxurious silhouettes and fabrics with street wear inspired prints and styling is a really interesting and unique contrast and if Billie Eilish ever decided to stop wearing those tweenie clothes and wanted to actually seduce somebody’s dad (I LOVE BILLIE EILISH AND I KNOW WHY SHE DRESSES THE WAY SHE DOES, IT’S A JOKE, PLS DON’T HATE ME), I’d love to see her wearing something like this. It’s a blend of punk, urban, and 2019 e-girl and has the kind of edge that Topshop has lost over the past couple of years that used to make it so aspirational to my 13 year old self. Of all the shows, it also probably has the most personally wearable accessories, and a shit tonne of cool make up looks I’d love to try if it weren’t for my lack of visible eyelid, lol.

Make up looks were a highlight of the Max Mara show too, for me anyway.

I otherwise wasn’t hugely keen on the collection, it being a little too matronly/Miss.Trunchbull-esque for my liking (wild card fashion inspiration of 2019, apparently?). The light paisley print dresses are very dreamy, though, and I can never resist a good suit. 

As for Michael Kors, dare I say it, but the basic bitch in me loved it. I know as a designer he’s not held in very high regard by the fashion community and I'm not saying it’s at all original but it did what it set out to do well; I mean, it’s quite fitting that he cameo-d in an episode of Gossip Girl because every outfit would be perfect for the Constance attending incarnation of Blair Waldorf, which is probably why I like the collection. Like yeah, it’s a bit of a Polo Ralph Lauren/Lacoste rip off but it’s daintier and more feminine and so I’m not gonna lie, I’m on board with it. 

Next, Miu Miu.

One of the collections I was most excited for, I was a little disappointed. Don’t get me wrong, I really like the collection, but I have never once disliked anything Miu Miu and I usually love it. There are things I love about this line too: the cream, floral lace-up boots, the off-the-shoulder cardigans, the houndstooth oversized coats and of course the fur-lined gilets. My mum used to buy me similar ones when I was a little girl and so they give me childhood nostalgia in the best way possible. I mean, the collection is as girly and eccentric as ever. I think it’s just a little too on the primary school librarian side for me, this time round. Sorry Miu Miu xoxo

Now I’m just gonna speed through a couple, starting with MM6 Maison Margiela, the younger sister to the more expensive regular Maison Margiela line:

And Monique Lhuillier:

So that I can get to one of my other ultimate favourite collections for S/S 2020: Moschino.

Oh my god, where to even start. Firstly, I might be reaching, but if this show is even remotely to thank for art nouveau mesh tops showing up in the Urban Outfitters new in section, then a very sarcastic thank you to Jeremy Scott. You just made ethical shopping a lot harder. HOW am I supposed to not buy an Alphonse Mucha top? HOW!? I mean, I’m sure I’ll manage (I’m on month 3 without a shopping spree I can’t actually afford now and yes, I am very much patting myself on the back), but HOW!?

But on a serious level, if renaissance was the print of 2019, which I’m still very much into BTW, bring on modern art as its 2020 replacement. The Pablo Picasso inspired show not only livened up a generally pretty predictable fashion month but it’s also got me searching up other times art has met fashion on the runway and thrown me down a particularly aesthetically pleasing wormhole I’m not sure I ever want to escape from (https://frontrowmagazine.ca/art-inspired-looks-were-all-over-the-runways-of-fashion-week-a74e8bc7ff0d and https://www.vogue.com/article/spring-2017-ready-to-wear-fine-arts-trends are good starting points!).

Mugler was also up there with the best of them, imo:

See, if the Moschino collection was all about dabbling in art class, Mugler’s S/S 2020 collection is its more mathematically inclined sister, all about sharp lines and deconstructed silhouettes and symmetry all whilst looking hot as fuck. So very Mugler, basically. 

Now, this reference might be slightly off because I haven’t actually SEEN Ex-Machina yet but I imagine if Kim Kardashian were to channel that movie for a costume party she’d end up wearing something from this collection. That sounds like a roast because Kim has worn some questionable outfits but I blame Kanye for most of that and I’m referring to her on a good fashion day, alright!?

As for Off-White, it’s obviously a lot more commercial than most of the lines I’ve reviewed so far. Like, I can see a lot of these outfits on a mannequin in Urban Outfitters (no, I am not being paid to namedrop them, about 3 people in total read this Tumblr so any kind of sponsorship money would be severely wasted on me). That’s not necessarily a bad thing, and I love all of these looks; it just seems unfair to compare them to the the Mugler or Moschino collections, for example. 

The stand outs for me are all on the bottom row: I would buy the utility vest, leather blazer and the all mesh turtleneck under washed-out tie-dye on the spot if I saw them in a high street store. Unfortunately, I feel like that’s kinda where they belong. You just expect collections to be a bit more conceptual, and this one is a little watered down, as much as it’s my style.

Oscar de la Renta was beautiful, of course. Not like I’m shook by how beautiful it is but kinda just what you’d expect from a brand with a name as poetic and fun to say as Oscar de la Renta. The silhouettes are dreamy and the details are as fit for a fairy princess (lmao) as ever. Plus can I just say how happy I am to see butterflies on dresses for adult women again!? And dresses worn by Blanca Padilla nonetheless!? Very here for it.

Next up is another on one of my fashion month highlights: Paco Rabanne.

LOOK AT THIS SHIT!

I mean, don’t get me wrong, something about this collection (I’m pretty sure it’s the knee high coloured socks) is giving me primary school teacher vibes, but I'm not mad about it. It’d be the kind of teacher who’s actually really good at their job and has loads of cool hobbies and a really hot boyfriend or girlfriend or wife or husband who you secretly want to be then you grow up/and or have a huge crush on. 

Like with Marc Jacobs, there’s obvious flower child elements here, and whilst on the whole the former took my breath away slightly more, this is a lot more wearable. My favourites are the paisley print dress and cape on the left in the very bottom row and all the chainmail pieces (which remind me of the dress Naomi Smalls wore in that whole club ninety-sixxxxx skit on drag race), plus that floral cut out dress with the trailing flute sleeves, which is absolute PERFECTION. 

The 70s influence was clear in Peter Pilotto’s S/S 2020 collection too from the abundance of tie-dye to the knit v-neck dress, zany colour and print being the very on-brand focus. That being said, this is definitely more of a street-style inspired collection than usual and whilst the floral suits and dresses on the 3rd row down are very typical Peter Pilotto, the tie-dye corset and combat trousers on the far right, second row from the bottom, are very Jaded London. As for the reoccurrence of the bucket hat, I’ve remained steadfastly against them for several years now (even when our Lord and Saviour Miss Robyn Rihanna Fenty started wearing them) but the way they’re done in this collection even I could definitely get behind; all in all, the show surpassed my expectations.

The same goes for Ports 1961, which was a lot more eccentric than I gathered is the norm from a few google searches. Honestly, I hadn’t really heard of the brand which, upon reading up on it, I feel very dumb for considering it has been around since (in the shock twist of the century) 1961.

Yes, I know how that sounds! But forgive me, I’m still learning:)

Anyway, the fishnet detailing alone pretty much sold the looks I picked out. Seriously, I got a pair of those bloody tights, like, 2 years ago when they became a thing again and now any outfit where I have my legs out feels incomplete without them. 

Next is Prabal Gurung, which, as far as presentation goes, was fucking STUNNING:

I mean, you could say that I’m easily impressed and that the presence of the bouquets won me over (and you’d definitely have a point there), but it’s also this year’s Givenchy haute couture-esque feathers, the trailing pearl necklaces, the exaggerated shoulders, the dreamy colouring, the everything looking like it could’ve grown off a very fashionably-inclined tree. Like, there’s a lot to love here, from the naturalistic elements, to the context behind the show, an ode to American fashion history and those cast out of it (and the notion of “being American” in general) for so long. 

Going from a high to a (personal) low, however, next we have Prada:

I don’t know, I get that it’s supposed to be simple and stripped back and dignified and whatever and I like the looks I picked but it’s just a bit blah for me. The bonnets that kept cropping up just didn’t do it for me and almost ruined what is an otherwise nice skirt suit (top right). Nonetheless, I like the silhouette of the sheer black dress and the the brocade print suit is really luxurious looking, even if the pattern is a *little* Wetherspoons carpet. 

Anyways, here’s a quick overview of Rag and Bone:

So that I can stop moaning and get onto a collection I REALLY liked: 

I am of course talking about Ralph and Russo. See, this is kinda what I expected from, like, Chanel and yet it’s Ralph and Russo that delivered. Also, it gives me Alessandra Rich vibes which is very much a compliment considering how much I love her designs. I mean, if Valley of the Dolls were to get another film remake in 2019, this is exactly what I’d like to see the female leads wearing, from the pastel suits to the satin kaftan style dresses. The yellow feather trimmed dress is practically a copy of something Marchesa has already done but it’s cute all the same. In my top 10 collections of the season, for sure.

Rick Owens was another strong collection; it goes without saying that it’s not the most wearable but that’s not really what Rick Owens is known for, so I wouldn’t expect anything else. If you want fashion on an alien planet, or something Lady Gaga would’ve worn in 2010, he's your man.

Next, Rodarte:

Obviously the dresses are beautiful and the set is magnificent, BUT...I’m really not a fan of the whole celebrities filling in for high fashion models thing. I like Lili Reinhart and I adore Kirsten Dunst, she’s been in a load of my favourite films, but in a similar vein to Dolce and Gabbana’s influencer show, it’s just distracting from the actual garments, if even worse because I don’t WANT to be distracted here (the same can’t be said for the D&G show, lol).  If anybody has read this far, let me know your thoughts! 

Roland Mouret was nice, and I always like a coed show, especially when a designer isn’t afraid to blur the lines of masculine and feminine. It’s fresh, lightweight and luxurious looking, Cannes film festival street style eat your heart out, and I love the colour palette.

Similarly, colour was my favourite thing about Sally LaPointe’s S/S 2020 collection. 

I would never think that teal and burnt orange would work together, let alone in some kind of faux leather, and yet here we are. Orange is in itself always an interesting colour choice, perfect for the summer with a tan, and I really love monochrome outfits, even though they’re something that ends up being quite pricey to put together; slight differences in tone are okay but if you just randomly throw together a few things and they’re too off, it really doesn’t work and you’d have been better off wearing contrasting colours. For that reason, I’m just gonna admire that all-pink outfit from a distance. 

As for Schiaparelli, it’s one I always look forwards to for the sheer weirdness. RTW isn’t quite as kooky as haute couture but still, the interesting choices are still there; what at first glance appears to be flame print is actually coils of hair, and paired with a water print suit is a sequinned jacket emblazoned with a paradisiacal mirage. Ornament-like facial decorations as seen in the over-exaggerated glasses worn with the pony hair suit are also one of my favourite new things to happen in the high fashion scene in the past couple of months and I can’t wait to see how they get watered down to become more approachable for us...regular, non-structurally blessed folks who can’t pull off anything and everything.

Simone Rocha was STUNNING. Romantic and ethereal, it’s druid goddess crossed with upper class Victorian woman of leisure, equal parts delicate and grungy, like a modern, fashion version of Lady Gaga’s Scathach in the Roanoke season of American Horror Story. You know, in the flashbacks, not in present day when she was all gross and like...scalping people and shit. Each dress is so ornate and has such an interesting structure, and the fabric choices give off an organic kinda vibe that create a handmade feel; the collection is, imo, really worthy of being shown under a haute couture heading. When it comes to my favourite element of the show, I’m torn between the petticoats and the hair accessories. I’m just gonna give a cop-out answer and say both. 

Stella McCartney on the other hand, is very much a clear ready-to-wear collection. 

It’s pretty, for sure. The pastel blazers paired with delicate white mesh tops underneath are a gorgeous combination for spring and I like the reoccurrence of the chain glasses (Gucci, right?). But I mean, when you go from Simone Rocha to this, it’s a bit anticlimactic. Plus, if I’m honest, kaftans are always going to remind me of Honey Mahogany from season 5 of Drag Race. Don’t get me wrong, I’m sure she’s a lovely person but her runway looks aren’t really ones I look back fondly on, and you’re lying if you say you enjoyed them for anything other than meme purposes.

Temperley is equally meh, though the return of the Erdem-style boating hats is getting me excited that high street retailers might actually pick up on the trend and bring out some cheap ones for me to embarrass myself by wearing. 

I also love a good 70s suit, the neckerchiefs are cute and there are some really delightful prints here that are a more unique approach to florals for spring.

Coming towards the end now, next is Thom Browne:

I LOVE this. Like, don’t get me wrong Rick Owens was cool but I adore how on the nose the concept is here; time to bring back all the Marie Antoinette puns I didn’t get to use in my Versailles Instagram post. I don’t know if it’s the history buff in me or the Sofia Coppola Stan but I will always be willing to sign any kind of treaty for anything related to the excesses of the 18th century French monarchy, and this is that turned up to 1000 infused with a dash of the Teletubbies, which sounds like a nightmarish concept, I know, but as high fashion it WORKS.

Tory Burch was very commercial, seemingly half inspired by Monterey yoga moms and the other half by Hamptons socialites. 

And then there was Valentino, which was fucking exquisite, imo. LIKE, CALLING DOCLE & GABBANA: THIS IS HOW YOU MAKE TROPICAL PRINT INTERESTING. YOU MAKE THE VELVET MONKEY’S ARM THE FRICKEN WAISTBAND. 

Seriously, though, I am enamoured with this colour palette; all the whites and golds are angelic and fr, I didn’t know until now that you could make neons this elegant. I’m also getting an almost clerical feel from a lot of these looks, with the plaited waistband on the black dress that’s 7th row down in the middle, the stunning red cape and the multitude of exaggerated neck ruffs. I think I’ve mentioned before but I always love religious references in clothing-I don’t think I’ll ever get over the 2018 Met Gala-and so whether I’m reading too much into it or not, this collection really did it for me.

Whilst it’s probably as far removed a collection from Valentino’s S/S 2020 contribution you can get, I also loved Vera Wang this season. It might purely (I PROMISE THIS IS MY LAST GOSSIP GIRL REFERENCE) be because it gives me Jenny Humphrey vibes and *controversial* she did have my favourite style of any of the main characters, but sue me, this is just the right amount of late 90s/early 2000s grunge. Deconstructed trashy goth it girl is an interesting concept to see on the runway and I completely support it. 

Versace on the other hand was very hit or miss. The looks I picked out I really loved but ultimately, for one of the household name brands, a lot of the actual garments were a bit pedestrian. I will say though that for me, it’s a case of the whole being greater than the sum of its parts. The slicked back mermaid hair and the pops of colour in the makeup and the interesting necklines meant that when it was good, it was GOOD. However, overall, still a bit too 80s Miami businesswoman, and please GOD, can we leave that hideous J-Lo dress in the past, it should really not be the climax of the show in 20-fucking-19!

As for Victoria Beckham, I liked it, but it’s a bit of a Gucci copy, no? And no way near as interesting?

And on that note, I’m gonna have to cut this off. Super annoying but with only 5 collections left that I want to talk about, Tumblr is being a little bitch and will not let me add anything more to this post. So, see you in 5 for the final post!

Lauren x

[bluboothalassophile]

Getting to Know More

Fun facts about Terry McGinnis:

He was a notorious middle child in a HUGE family: Dick, Jason, Athanasia, Cassandra, Tim, Duke, Damian, Alina, himself, Helena, Thomas, Bruce Jr., and Matt. His extended family included Dick’s wife, and Dick’s kids, Thomas, Mar’i, and Jake; Jason’s adopted daughter Lian Harper; Tim’s wife, Stephanie; and Duke’s wife; Claire Clover. His extended, extended family also had Uncle Luke’s and Aunt Babs’ kids; Carrie and Nell, Bette Kane, Grampa Lucius, and, well, at this point one got the picture; huge ass colony of Bats living in Gotham here.

He shredded it where skateboard, hockey, motocross were concerned, but he had the coordination of a spaz for baseball and surfing.

His mom was awesome on epic proportions. Seriously, he didn’t know how she did it but she redefined super mom.

Another thing to know, he totally did not have a crush on the Princess of Atlantis, he was only going with her to this movie because he happened to like it, and because Mareena was the only chick he knew who didn’t like chick flicks (Mar’i, Helena, Lian, and Max could all go Suck It! He was going to see a damn action flick if it fucking killed him this year!) Mareena just also happened to like action flicks, which was why she was here with him.

Standing there in the theatre line he tried not to stare at Mareena who was hiding her identity under a hoodie she had stolen from his room when she had walk up to the Manor with a movie for them to see. Mareena did not have friends in Atlantis who appreciated the arts of action flicks. Terry didn’t care though, he was no longer being that weirdo who was going to a theatre alone. Also, she was a chick Dana could not get jealous over and drive him insane. He would think college meant that the drama would die off with the age grow up, but apparently not. And he was not getting blue balls because Dana was having imaginary jealous fits over imaginary slights.

“Why can the line not move faster,” Mareena huffed.

“Because the line is moving this pace because people are slow. Besides, we’re ahead of the line for the premiere line,” he jabbed his thumb over his shoulder to show her. Mareena frowned.

“You people are annoying,” Mareena said icily.

“How are we annoying, you wanted to go to this movie, so I’m going with you to see this movie,” he said.

“I would’ve asked someone else, but,” she started.

“There’s no one but Don and Dawn, and we both know there’s no way in hell that Barry and Iris would let them come.”

“I could’ve gone to New Krypton,” Mareena argued.

“Oh yes, because watching their movies is so entertaining,” Terry rolled his eyes.

“You land dwellers have no appreciation for the fine arts of moving with a flow,” Mareena argued.

“Pipe down, and don’t draw attention of the paparazzi,” he snapped when her hood started falling off of her head, which had him pulling it more firmly over the green hair of hers. Only disadvantage of going to the movies with Mareena was the fact her hair glowed in the dark. But other than that, trade offs, made it worth it!

“You do realize they’d be more inclined to notice you and not me, right?”

“I’m wearing a Gotham Knights cap, and I am not royalty, I’m just one of a hundred Wayne kids,” Terry point out.

“I thought you were a Prince,” Mareena said.

“No, I’m a Wayne,” he said. “Not royalty.”

“You are also…” she held up her index fingers by her head and smiled a bit.

“Yeah, but that doesn’t count,” he shrugged. Dick had been Batman, Jason had briefly been to save Dick’s wedding, Cass currently was, Damian was next. It wasn’t anything special anymore, it wasn’t special in the family he belonged in. Though B was still the control freak behind the scenes for them so technically B was still the Bat.

“Why not?”

“Cause B’s the big man in charge.”

“Your dad is in a wheelchair,” Mareena pointed out.

“Partial paralyses is not a disability, it just means his legs have to take a break sometimes and Mom has to push him around, it’s not abnormal to what normally happens with him,” he shrugged.

“You guys have issues,” Mareena stated.

Terry merely shrugged. “Dad’s fine, we’re fine, it’s all fine!” he snorted.

“Last time you said that everything was on fire,” Mareena stated.

“Let me restate we’re fine. But mostly keep your hair away so I don’t have to explain to Dana why the hell I’m seen with another woman.” Terry stated.

“Ah, the nefarious Dana, why are you still dating that woman?” Mareena asked. “She was bratty when you were a teen, she’s worse now.”

“Not all of us get fairy tale romances,” Terry shrugged. “Besides, I like sex, sex is a great relief to the stress of everything.”

“You sound like a cad.”

“You should hear my sisters talk,” he shrugged. Mar’i, Helena, Max, and Lian were way worse than him about the sex talks, girls were all about feelings, and emotions and connections, it was annoying, and they always talked about it and guys! Terry probably knew more about women than the average guy and it was a disturbing amount information his sisters had given him. And just to clarify, he thought of Mar’i, Lian and Max as his sisters because he had known them since he was in diapers! It was hard to think of them as anything remotely close to something other than sisters.

“And you shouldn’t knock down romance,” Mareena stated. “Your family has the most epic love stories according to my father. Other than maybe Diana and Steve’s.”

“You’re nuts!” he sputtered.

“Am not, the story of B and Selina, Dick and Kori, Jason and Raven, Tim and Stephanie, B and Talia,” she stated. “Epic romances.”

“That’s just gross, and disturbing to think about my family’s love lives,” he grimaced.

“You guys are secret sweethearts I bet,” Mareena decided with a cheeky smile.

“We are the Knight! We are the Terror of Nightmares! We are NOT Sweethearts! Even Alina is even an epic of epic badasses,” he argued. His phone buzzed and he pulled it out to see the text was from his mom.

“What’s up?”

“After the movie we need to go get Matt, Carrie, Tommy and Nell from school. Babs and Luke had to go to Africa,” he said.

“Oh.”

“So we’ll get them, get a slice, and then I’ll drop you off, or are you tubing?” he asked.

“Why would I be tubing?”

“Cause it’s up or down with you,” he retorted.

“Can I stay? I haven’t hung around the surface too much, and I do not want to go to the Tower,” she said.

“Yeah. Julia will help us set up a room for you,” Terry said. Julia had come to Gotham recently because Alfred was sick.

“Who is Julia?” Mareena asked.

“Julia is Alfred’s daughter,” he answered.

“Alfred is not B’s father?” she said in bizarre wonderment.

“Uh… yeah, not a secret,” he pointed out. “Alfred is awesome, and he’s totally grandpa, but he’s not blood.” Terry shrugged.

“WHAT!?” Mareena sputtered. Terry jumped a bit as he stared at her bewildered expressioned.

“What!?”

“He’s not blood!?”

“No, I mean, like ninety percent of my family isn’t blood.”

“Really?”

“Yeah,” he shrugged. “It’s not news.”

“I…” she started. “I always thought you were related,” he said.

“Really?”

“Black hair, blue eyes, ungodly pale.”

“What about Duke or Damian!?” he sputtered.

“Okay, so you don’t all look alike,” she rolled her eyes.

“Exactly, and we are all pretty much adopted. Only Athanasia, Damian, Alina, Helena, Tommy, Junior, Matt and I are actually B’s blood kids.”

“I thought you were just… you know, cause you’re a huge family and dad says B started young, really young, so I just assumed,” she shrugged.

“It’s all public record,” he shrugged. “B hasn’t been shy about it. Dick, Babs, Jason, Cass, Tim, Duke, Steph, technically and kind of, Harper, Cullen, Bette, and Renee.”

“I just thought you were related, and I thought you were also, you know,” she shrugged innocently.

“What else did you think we were!?” He sputtered.

“Vampires,” she said innocently.

“I hate dad for starting that rumor,” Terry muttered sourly.

“That one is funny though!” She persisted. “Hal told me, before I met you guys, that you were all demons.”

“Well, Rae is,” he shrugged.

“I thought your dad was big anti- anything that isn’t human marrying into my family,” Mareena said.

“Luci made valid points which had B accepting the fact marrying into a family as divine and powerful as Rae’s is a… you know, it’s kind of a divine honor,” Terry shrugged. “Besides, I didn’t know they weren’t married until they were officially married.”

“You didn’t know they weren’t married?” Mareena asked.

“They’ve been together since I was in diapers,” Terry shrugged.

“Really?”

“Yes really. I’m pretty sure they were the ones who found me,” Terry said.

“I’m learning more about you than I ever thought possible.”

“All of this is actually public record.”

“Really?” she asked skeptically.

“My biological mother was Mary McGinnis, she was married to Warren McGinnis, they died in a car crash when I was three days old and they were driving home from the hospital. I’m technically property of A.R.G.U.S. so Waller took me in, Jason found me about a year later,” Terry explained.

“That’s weird,” she decided.

“No, what’s weirder is the fact that Matt is my full brother,” Terry stated. “Mary and Warren were dead five years before Matt was even conceived, and he’s my full brother.”

“What?”

“Yeah.”

“I thought you were B’s blood son,” Mareena said carefully.

“I am. Waller injected a serum into Warren McGinnis’ DNA to scramble his own DNA to match with Bruce’s. Warren was a chimera essentially thanks to Waller’s tinkering,” Terry said. “I’m a ‘clone’ of Bruce’s in a way or I was supposed to be with what Waller set up, and I’m his son, but NO, he did not get involved in the conception of me or my blood brother Matt. He’s the genetic material for us. He’s still Dad though since he’s well, Dad,” Terry shrugged.

“That’s complicated.”

“That’s my family. Also, completely public record,” he shrugged.

“You’re not normal,” she said icily.

“What!? I’m completely normal! I’m going to a movie, and with you no less, in broad daylight, and I’m not turning to ash because of the sun either!” he smiled.

“You’re sounding like a assbutt,” she muttered.

“Asshole,” he corrected. “And you started it.”

“What did you expect from my family?” she asked.

“Lots of energy,” he answered honestly. “Dad always said that you guys were energetic like no tomorrow and wild, also unpredictable, dangerous, and loud, very loud.”

“You expected that!?” she sputtered.

“Did you think I was expecting a mermaid from Little Mermaid, fishtail and all?” he asked her.

“Yes!”

“Nah,” he shrugged.

“You’re an ass,” she informed him.

“I’m aware.”

“Good.”

“Besides, I’m a you know,” he shrugged. “Being unpleasant and assholes in general are required.”

“Oh! The ticket booth! And next time we are dropping your family name to get into the movie.”

“You wanted to be a normal American teen this time instead of being a Princess of you know,” he said.

“I did not want that. You wanted that. Freaking love of invisibility. I swear if you were metas you’d all be like that.”

“Rae cast an invisibility spell once, that was awesome, terrifying and cool.”

“Why!?”

“Oh, the demons were hunting her, I was like seven, and it was a giant hide and seek game,” Terry said.

“That’s not normal.”

“You grew up under the sea,” he pointed out.

“You grew up in Gotham.”

“I don’t like you right now,” she decided.

“You adore me, I’m paying for the movie,” he pointed out.

“True,” she decided.

“Awe, you two are an adorable couple!” the ticket attendant said when they stepped up to buy the tickets for S.O.S. “First date?”

“We’re not a couple,” Terry stated as he paid for the tickets.

“But we are friends!” Mareena declared slinging her arm around his shoulders.

“Barely.”

“You adore me!” she declared.

Terry rolled his eyes as the ticket clerk chuckled but gave them their tickets. “I’ll spring for the snacks, you get the good seats,” he ordered as they had their ticket punched and walked into the crowd.

[wendynerdwrites]

Random Rant about Princess Diana, Prince Charles, and Camilla

Okay, so despite being a gauche, socially progressive American who really doesn’t get why monarchies exist anymore, I am kind of a low-key royal watcher/follower. I was a HUGE fan of/admirer of Princess Diana when I was a little girl and am still a fan of hers in many ways.

But I’m also a fan of Charles and Camilla.

“But how???? Charles and Camilla ruined Diana’s life! They are eeeevil!!!!”

First of all, NO.

Diana Spencer had intense issues way before she hooked up with Charles, for one thing. Her parents had a bitter divorce and custody battle that basically ravaged her childhood. Seriously, at one point her dad was practically holding her hostage away from her mother during Christmas. You think the Wales divorce was messy?... It was. But it was basically just a sequel to Spencer family drama.

By Diana’s own words, she struggled with bulimia from her adolescent years and had severe abandonment issues.

Ever wonder why William’s pet cause is mental health? DIANA IS WHY.

She also grew up among a very specific “set” that included the royal family. She and her sister were playmates to Prince Andrew and Prince Edward. She grew up with the same weirdo aristocratic approach to marriage as them as well which was: pop out an heir and spare, then do whatever.

While she was young and naive and apparently did have a HUGE crush on Charles that resulted in her buying into the fairy tale narrative, she wasn’t the total shrinking violet/know-nothing people sometimes make her out to be. Diana thought she’d be the exception. She was wrong. But she DID enter that marriage with a shit-ton of pre-installed baggage that CHARLES HAD NOTHING TO DO WITH.

Second of all, ALSO NO.

God... This engagement and marriage was made of such crazy fuckery. But Diana was all in, hook, line, and sinker.

Charles, less so. And the situation was just... so fucked, you guys. And, no, sorry, it wasn’t all Charles’s fault. Or Diana’s fault. Or Prince Philip’s fault. But it went like this:

Basically, Chuck was pushing 30, was heir, and had yet to further the royal line, so to speak. It had been nearly a decade since he was formally invested as Prince of Wales. And the issue of him getting hitched had always been... there, but it really got serious as he neared the big 3-0. Especially since his younger sister, Anne, was already married and had a kid. But over the years, he’d had Richard Nixon try to set him up with his daughter and had been geared towards various COUSINS by no less than his “Uncle Dickie” AKA Lord Mountbatten AKA the guy who hooked Prince Philip up with Queen Elizabeth, who was basically Charles’s second Father.

Things got serious as Charles got older, though. Rumors were getting out that he might be gay (remember, this was the late 70′s/early 80′s and Charles is HEIR TO THE THRONE. One factor is/was that Charles is/was a surprisingly progressive dude even then and didn’t bat an eye at employing men who were OPENLY GAY IN THE 70′s. But the thing was, whether or not Charles was gay, if the public believed that, it could have potentially caused a CONSTITUTIONAL CRISIS BECAUSE ROYALTY IS ALL OF THE EXTRA)

Charles was into aristocratic blonds... Fine. Perfect... Except for the part where the aristocratic blonds he tended to go for were non-virgins (and therefore completely unsuitable according to his beloved Uncle Dickie)... also married.

...That’s not Camilla, BTW. Camilla was already married to Andrew Parker-Bowles at this point. The lady in the picture there is Lady Dale “Kanga” Tryon, a fashion designer and Charles’s other mistress who actually lived a really interesting life culminating in a super tragic death. We’ll come back to her later.

But basically, Charles had to marry a virginal aristocrat, and fast. So he entered into a sort of courting pool of eligible ladies, at one point dating Lady Sarah Spencer, Diana’s older sister. But Lady Sarah went, “Nah, my sister is WAAAY more into you anyways. Date her.”

Now, if this sounds SUPER CREEPY, ANTIQUATED, AND MESSED UP, EVEN FOR THE 70′S AND 80′S, THAT’S BECAUSE IT IS. THIS IS THE WORLD THESE PEOPLE OPERATED IN, HOWEVER. AND THE ONLY THING MORE INSANE THAN ARISTOCRATS WERE ARISTOCRATS IN THE 70′S AND 80′S. THE ONLY THING MORE INSANE THAN ARISTOCRATS IN THE 70′S AND 80′S WERE THE ONES IN THE 60′S. JUST ASK PRINCESS MARGARET. THIS SHIT IS TAME COMPARED TO THE SHIT CHARLES UNCLE TONY GOT UP TO. POINT IS, THIS WAS WEIRD FROM THE BEGINNING.

Anyways, the two seemed to hit it off, but they were only dating a couple months when the press moved in and started making everything a hundred times crazier. Diana found herself hounded by the press, culminating in the papers slut-shaming her for LITERALLY TAKING AN OVERNIGHT TRIP ON A TRAIN.

This prompted Charles dad, Prince Philip, notorious for choosing his words poorly, basically sending a letter to his son telling him to basically shit or get off the pot before he ruined Diana’s life and reputation. Charles, emotionally stunted and basically terrified of his dad, took this to mean that he HAD to marry her, or he WOULD ruin her life. Keep in mind Diana was SUPER SUPER into him.

WHICH LED TO THIS DISASTER:

Charles went into this marriage feeling bound by duty, figuring Diana was game, that he could make her happy, that he was doing the right thing, and that she’d be along for the ride --- which included the model of marriages they were both used to.

He was VERY WRONG.

Diana went into her marriage completely in love, knowing that Charles had girlfriends, knowing adultery was the norm, believing she’d be a game-changer.

She was technically right, but NOT in the way she imagined. She fell for the fairy-tale Charles thought they were merely selling to the public. She was an emotionally unstable 19-year-old with severe family baggage, and Charles was an emotionally stunted prince with his head shoved right up his royal butt.

What a winner.

THIRD OF ALL, NO.

Remember that Kanga lady from the picture above? Lady Tryon was a business woman and fashion designer. And one of Charles’s mistresses.

She was Camilla’s rival. NOT Diana’s.

See that dress Diana is wearing at Live Aid? Designed by Kanga, Charles’s mistress. Yes, Diana knew who Kanga was and the nature of her relationship with Charles. At this point, Diana was cured of her delusions and was onto her own affairs. She and Kanga became friends and basically allied against Camilla.

At this point, Diana accepted that she and her husband would not be faithful to one another (it’s worth noting that during the early years of their marriage, both of them WERE supposedly faithful. Charles had his last run-in with Camilla the night before the wedding and kept away from both her and Kanga at least until Harry was conceived. But he also basically told Diana at that point that eventually, he’d be bed-hopping again. Basically, he knew Diana would have to be faithful until an heir and spare were produced and seemed to consider it fair play that he not indulge while she couldn’t. If that sounds completely fucked up THAT’S BECAUSE IT WAS). She gradually stopped caring about Charles cheating. She just hated that it was with Camilla. She very quickly embarked on a string of affairs of her own.

----And yes, Charles was a douche. He was also dealing with a wife he did NOT understand who had severe mental health issues.

Diana did things like call Camilla late at night to tell her that there was a man waiting outside, hired to kill her. She would also sometimes abscond with Baby Harry and William without telling Charles or anyone. Not a big deal in a normal family. But they’re royalty. So basically, she was happy to let her husband go into a panic about his sons possibly being kidnapped because he had no idea where the fuck they were. Keep in mind that Charles’s own sister was nearly abducted in 1974 by a gunman and that in 1982, THE VERY YEAR WILLIAM WAS BORN, a man had snuck into the Queen’s bed in the middle of the night carrying a shard of broken glass. So, yeah, Diana grabbing the boys and taking them to Windsor Castle without telling anyone, including her husband? SUPER SHITTY.

Charles tried to get Diana help, but she didn’t trust him whatsoever (because of course she fucking didn’t, no one would). Diana didn’t start getting proper help for her mental health issues until the separation. But she was prone to fits of extreme paranoia and rage, at one point culminating in her physically attacking Charles while he was praying.

Point is, she had a lot of troubles and instabilities. While Charles and Camilla certainly did not HELP, this was shit that went back years and years. Granted, that WAS exacerbated by royal life, but much of that was the strain of royal work --- constant travel, unending media scrutiny, a ton of fame all at once --- and the intense workload she was given when she became Princess of Wales did not help, either. Diana was young, troubled, and had a ton of issues.

BUT

Charles did not ruin her life. Nor did Camilla. Especially since Diana was kind of a badass.

(Pictured: Badass Diana badassing through her badass post-divorce life like a badass)

She wasn’t a Rhodes Scholar, but she was a freaking genius at handling the press and an unparalleled activist. And she got some terrific revenge on her cheating husband, too. She nearly bankrupted him in the divorce (Charles had to borrow money from the queen) and turned him into a villain in the eyes of the press.

Once out of royal life, she felt comfortable enough to get help. She got joint custody of the kids. She found great fulfillment in her activism and did some really fantastic things for causes like AIDS and land mines. She had a string of hot, rich boyfriends who spoiled the crap out of her and she was adored the world over by almost EVERYONE. That even included her ex-father-in-law, Prince Philip, who still signed his letters to her as “Pa.”

Charles nor Camilla could NEVER have hoped to ruin her life. She had too much of it. Diana’s life was ruined by a drunk driver, some paparazzi, and a traffic accident.

(And to those who want to claim that the royal family had her killed: kindly fuck off. Mohammed Fayed has had his case dismissed repeatedly despite numerous appeals and investigations. The only way Prince Philip would have had Diana killed would be if he REALLY REALLY wanted to end the monarchy. Somehow I don’t think an exiled prince-turned-royal-consort wants that. There was nothing the royal family wanted more than to see Diana married off to some rich guy and fade into the background. The LAST thing they would want is for Willam and Harry’s mother to die tragically young and cement herself as an eternal legend. Diana’s death was a fucking nightmare for the BRF personally as well as professionally).

Charles and Camilla, meanwhile?

Camilla kept her head down and did quiet work for osteoperosis research after her mother was afflicted with it. Since becoming Duchess of Cornwall, she’s done extensive work on behalf of rape and sexual assault survivors. Among her initiatives was developing “wash bags” consisting of soaps and towels for victims to use after undergoing their rape kits.

Charles spent years being decried as a complete kook for being all worked up over stupid non-issues you might have heard of --- things like “climate change”, “sustainable farming”, “organic foods”, “the ozone layer” and a supposed “housing crisis” in Britain. Oh, and his lifelong project, The Prince’s Trust, is only one of the most important charitable organizations in the Western World.

So yeah, if I have to hear one more comment about EEEEEEVIL Charles and Camilla ruining poor, wilting flower Diana’s life again, I’ll see red. It’s insulting to all three of them.

(Once again, for the record, I think monarchy is outdated and dumb, But if you are going to have one, your heir to the throne should be a Charles. Or a Victoria. But if you can’t have a Victoria, you should have a Charles.)

[wp-yahoo-style-1042-yahoopa-blog]

Meghan Markle shows skin in a sexy tuxedo minidress to see 'Hamilton,' and social media loves it

Now that she’s a part of the royal family, Meghan Markle rarely gets to wear something even slightly sexy. So who could blame her for taking the opportunity to show some skin on date night?

Meghan attended a performance of Hamilton Wednesday night in London with Prince Harry and made jaws drop by appearing in a sleek tuxedo minidress for the occasion.

The couple’s date night was for a good cause, as the gala performance of musical benefited Sentebale, Prince Harry’s charity with Prince Seeiso of Lesotho.

Meghan Markle chose a daring look for her date night. (Photo: Dan Charity-WPA Pool/Getty Images)

For the occasion, the duchess went with a sophisticated yet sexy style. Her black double-breasted dress had a plunging neckline balanced out by long sleeves. The $600 Judith and Charles frock also had a shorter-than-normal hemline for the duchess, revealing a lot of leg, which was accentuated by Stuart Weitzman black suede pumps. And the shine on her gams says she wasn’t wearing pantyhose.

With a snug fit, the look was slightly sexy but also subdued, thanks to a lack of jewelry and a simple gold box clutch.

And social media is super-supportive of it.

“LET

THE

GIRL

BREATHE

!” one fan wrote.

LET 👏🏾THE 👏🏾GIRL👏🏾BREATHE👏🏾! #MeghanMarkle

— Nina♍ (@Niinstar) August 29, 2018

Definitely did not just order a similar dress to Meghan Markle already 👀

— hannah (@hannah61275535) August 29, 2018

meghan markle looks insanely good tonight like WOW that dress

— shauna (@pimpabxtterfly) August 29, 2018

The outfit is such a great "F*ck you U haters!" on so many levels. Absolutely love this couple.

Meghan Markle Attends Hamilton in Her Sexiest Look Yet – Prince Harry Meghan Markle Hamilton Appearance https://t.co/Y7LdXu6FSh

— MissFit (@MissFit56862376) August 29, 2018

Of course, people can’t stop commenting on her visible legs, so one Twitter user pointed out that it’s not the first time a royal has rocked a short hemline.

Seeing as everyone's going off at the length of Meghan's dress, here's a thread of Royals wearing dresses the same length or shorter. #DuchessofSussex #MeghanMarkle #DuchessofCambridge #KateMiddleton #PrincessDiana pic.twitter.com/F1lXclv0ZQ

— mollie (@molliemmarkle) August 29, 2018

It’s about time the girl got to wear a tuxedo. In July, a rumor spread that the Duchess of Sussex really wanted to wear a tuxedo during her first royal tour in Australia but that Prince Harry nixed the idea.

She follows in the footsteps of many amazing women who’ve made menswear their own. Jane Fonda wore a tuxedo for her 80th birthday party. Eva Longoria frequently wears plunging pantsuits. At 2016’s Golden Globes, Evan Rachel Wood wore a sexy tuxedo. And at last year’s Golden Globes, pantsuits held a lot of power, especially among women in support of #TimesUp.

Princess Diana in a tuxedo at Wembley Stadium in 1988. (Photo: Shutterstock)

Even her late mother-in-law, Princess Diana, rocked tuxedos and skirt suits a time or two, including a Margaret Howell tuxedo in 1984 and a Catherine Walker pink and purple tuxedo-style skirt suit in 1990.

Read more from Yahoo Lifestyle:

Meghan Markle Just Wore Princess Diana’s Signature Outfit to Buckingham Palace

Princess Diana Wore a Department Store Suit When She Got Engaged to Prince Charles

Meghan Markle’s wedding dress is going on display — here’s how to see it in person

Follow us on Instagram, Facebook, and Twitter for nonstop inspiration delivered fresh to your feed, every day.

[shtcablogs]

Royal Wedding Face-Off

2018 - the year of Royal Weddings. Princess Eugenie got married this past weekend, and Rachel Zane married the UK’s #1 most eligible bachelor in May. How do these two weddings compare to Princess Kate and Prince William’s wedding back in 2011? Let’s find out. I’ll be using twelve categories to determine who had the best wedding. 3 points for the category winner, 2 for second place, and 1 point for the loser. The bride with the most overall points is the official Royal Wedding Queen (although we all know who the real queen is here - quite literally Kate Middleton).

1. Wedding Dress

Are long sleeves a royal wedding dress requirement? Probably. Either way I’m a huge fan. I do love all three dresses, so this is a hard choice. Eugenie’s is a little ill-fitting, especially through the sleeves. Meghan’s is very chic, but not quite “royal” enough in my opinion (and Prince George’s). Kate looks like a dream, going to have to give her this one.

Kate (3 points)

Meghan (2 points)

Eugenie (1 point)

2. Train

The best part of a royal wedding dress is the train, obviously. Meghan and Eugenie both had an advantage here as they got married at the same venue with that large staircase, perfect for train photos. Although Meghan’s train was underwhelming compared to Kate and Eugenie’s, her veil was extremely long and dramatic. But, I’m giving this one to Eugenie because I LOVE a huge bow.

Eugenie (3 points)

Kate (2 points)

Meghan (1 point)

3. Accessories

Let’s see the royal bling. I’m really digging Eugenie’s emeralds. Very unique and refreshing, but also classically royal. First place. I’m going to have to give Kate last place here because those earrings are a little basic (well, as basic as diamonds can be).

Eugenie (3 points)

Meghan (2 points)

Kate (1 point)

4. Bouquet

Is it just me or do all of these bouquets suck? They’re puny and cheap looking in my opinion. Maybe the British aren’t as into flowers as we are? Whatever the reason, I’m bored by these. I’d give them all last place if I could.

Eugenie (3 points)

Kate (2 points)

Meghan (1 point)

5. Hair and Make-Up

If you think Kate doesn’t have this category in the bag, you’re dead wrong. Perfect skin, perfect hair, a true princess. Meghan’s hairdo caught a lot of flak, but I think her make-up looks stunning. I’m pretty indifferent over Eugenie’s hair, and I think she has on way too much blush. Also let’s be honest, your make-up is only going to look as good as the canvas you put it on, and Eugenie just can’t compete with Kate and Meghan in the looks department.

Kate (3 points)

Meghan (2 points)

Eugenie (1 point)

6. The Groom

A balding future king, a red-headed party boy, and a cute commoner. I guess it really depends what you’re looking for here, as these three men are all very different. Prince Harry looks pretty swaggy in his all-black uniform, and Prince William looks like a real badass despite his receding hairline. Jack Brooksbank is a cutie, but he’s got some stiff competition unfortunately. I’m giving this one to Meghan.

Meghan (3 points)

Kate (2 points)

Eugenie (1 point)

7. Wedding Party

I love that Brits have kid bridesmaids and page boys instead of what us Americans would think of as a traditional wedding party. Of course, Pippa Middleton was the breakout star of William and Kate’s wedding (probably only because George and Charlotte weren’t born yet, though). Meghan’s page boys are really freaking me out in those long black coats. On the other hand, Charlotte is the cutest thing I’ve ever seen. Are Eugenie’s bridesmaids and page boys wearing... Lilly Pulitzer? A lot to digest here. I’m giving this one to Kate.

Kate (3 points)

Eugenie (2 points)

Meghan (1 point)

8. Engagement Ring

Another difficult category, I’m in love with all three. If I have to pick a winner, I’m going with Kate. I love the huge sapphire and the fact that this was Princess Diana’s ring. Meghan’s is a little basic compared to the other two, but it’s GIANT and gorgeous nonetheless. Eugenie’s is beautiful and pink (my favorite color), but it’s too similar to Kate’s to really knock me off my feet.

Kate (3 points)

Meghan (2 points)

Eugenie (1 point)

9. Carriage Procession

Not gonna lie, I think Eugenie’s enclosed carriage is pretty baller. Supposedly she planned to ride in an open carriage and had a last minute switch due to windy conditions. Kate and William looked a little stiff in their carriage procession, but picturesque nonetheless. They’re the future King and Queen of England, so it’s automatically iconic. I will say that Meghan and Harry looked genuinely happy during their carriage ride, probably because she was trying way too damn hard. Giving this one to Eugenie for previously mentioned baller carriage.

Eugenie (3 points)

Kate (2 points)

Meghan (1 point)

10. Reception Dress

I am living for Eugenie’s blush Zac Posen reception dress. She really knocked that one out of the park. Meghan’s dress is fun and chic, although ill-fitting. Her tailor needs to be fired. Kate’s is very pretty, but I can’t get over that fuzzy white jacket. It really ruins the whole look for me. Eugenie wins this one by a long shot.

Eugenie (3 points)

Meghan (2 points)

Kate (1 point)

11. VIP Guests

Cara Delevingne has been the talk of the town this weekend for her royal wedding outfit, rightfully so. And you know you’ve made it when George and Amal Clooney show up to your wedding. The most interesting people I could find that attended Kate and Will’s wedding were Victoria and David Beckham, but they were also at Meghan and Harry’s, so nothing too special there. Does Posh Spice ever enjoy anything she does? I’d bet not.

Eugenie (3 points)

Meghan (2 points)

Kate (1 point)

12. Official Photos

Kate and William’s official wedding photo is insanely creepy. They look like they belong in Madame Tussauds Wax Museum. Meghan and Harry’s photo is so cute I could die. I can assure you I’ll be recreating this exact photo at my wedding, whenever that may be. I also love Eugenie and Jack’s photo, mainly because it’s in the carriage that I love so much. This one goes to Meghan hands down.

Meghan (3 points)

Eugenie (2 points)

Kate (1 point)

Let’s tally up.

3rd place with 22 points: Meghan Markle. Not surprising, you can’t just throw an American into the royal family and expect things to go off without a hitch. Her wedding was the most modern, but is that what the people want from a royal wedding? Not particularly. Meghan’s highlight: her groom. Meghan’s downfall: definitely her hair and the creepy page boy outfits.

2nd place with 24 points: Kate Middleton. Kate’s wedding was as classically royal as you can get, but I wish she would’ve loosened up a little. Kate and Meghan could’ve learned a lot from each other. Kate’s highlight: Her dress and overall look. Kate’s downfall: that fuzzy reception jacket and her stiff photos.

And the royal wedding winner with 26 points is...

PRINCESS EUGENIE

I guess it’s true that royal blood means better taste. I’m not surprised. Eugenie’s wedding was the perfect mix of elegant and chic. Eugenie’s highlight: her jewelry and reception dress. Oh, and Cara Delevingne really helped, too. Her downfall: the commoner she married. Congrats, princess.

God save the Queen.

[darrencrissource]

This is the third installment of Ryan Murphy’s acclaimed anthology, American Crime Story: Versace. 

Edgar Ramirez stars as the openly gay designer, who was tragically gunned down on the steps of his Miami Beach mansion in 1997 by serial killer Andrew Cunanan, played by Darren Criss. 

The limited series chronicles the bizarre murder and the manhunt for Cunanan, who targeted gay men and was responsible for five murders. 

Casting Darren Criss as Cunanan 

Ryan Murphy: I didn’t have to convince him at all. What I like to do is give people opportunities sometimes that they would never have. And Darren is obviously a brilliant singer and a performer and a showman and did “Glee” and has been on Broadway. When Brad Simpson and Nina Jacobson and I were first talking about this idea of doing Versace as sort of the O.J. follow-up, which was around two years ago, I immediately called Darren. Because to me he was the only one for that part. And I just said, I’m thinking about doing this, would you be interested. And he said, well yes, very much so because it’s such a great part. And I said, ok I’ll get the contracts drawn. And then it took two years because you have to write it and you have to get it green-lit. But he was always the only person I had in mind for it because I knew that he would push himself because he was so hungry to prove himself in a different way. And it’s a truly insane dramatic part. And he really wanted to go there. So he was the only person we talked to. He hadn’t heard from me and then he was getting ready to do another show and the day it was announced that Versace was up, he was, oh shit what am I going to do. But we all worked it out so he was able to get out and commit pretty much a year to it. And he was great. Brad and Nina went to see him in “Hedwig” and he knew they were in the audience so of course he came out and sat on Brad’s lap and did the whole showbiz thing. 

Relationship to Versace 

RM: I never met him but I know a lot of people who did meet him. I sold my first script in late 1996 so I was just starting. And he obviously was killed a year later so I never got to meet him. I knew a lot of people who were very close to him. I’ve worked with Naomi Campbell who was very close to him, who told me a lot of interesting things about him. Madonna, there’s the Madonna guest suite upstairs which is the first place I went to when we came here. She used to sit in the bathtub and stand up and tease them all out in the courtyard. I never got to meet him, but he was always somebody I was very interested in. I loved him. I felt like I had a lot in common with him, what he did and where he came from and how he really dedicated his life to beauty and style and was obsessed with a vision of things. And I related to him. I was at restaurant called Off Vine in L.A. when I first heard the news. And weirdly was also at the same restaurant when Princess Diana died. So I’ve stopped going to Off Vine after the Princess Diana announcement. I was just very moved and shattered by it. It was somebody who’s gay, who is in the gay community, of course then, half the people I knew who had had ties to Hollywood and San Diego said, I was at a bar, I met Andrew Cunanan. So there was always a very mythical thing about that guy. But it was just a real tragedy. And the reason I wanted to do this story so badly was because if you do O.J., what do you do to top O.J.? You have to do something completely different. And I wanted to do something smaller and more intimate. And, it’s a different kind of crime. When we do “American Crime” we’re not just going to do Jon Benet, we’re not going to just do something salacious. It has to be about something that has American social issues in it. And this period of time that we’re talking about, 1997, there were really two people who were out in entertainment, Elton John and Gianni Versace. 

Versace as Openly Gay 

RM: Versace really struggled with it. There were a lot of conversations with Donatella. Should I come out of the closet? Because my business is going public. He was terrified that by not being able to be himself he would be discriminated against and lose everything. That was also the period of don’t ask, don’t tell, which we dive into. The reason why it’s such an interesting American crime is because Gianni Versace was only killed because of homophobia. Andrew Cunanan killed and targeted people who were gay or who were in the closet. And his murders tend to out them. There was a gentleman who was in his 70’s named Lee Miglin who was one of the early victims, whose family was so upset and terrified of his personal life coming out that they just sort of said, motive unknown. And the police didn’t pursue it. And by the time Cunanan got to Miami, the police officers in town had thousands of wanted posters in the trunks of the cars that they would not put up because they would not go to gay bars. They just wouldn’t do it. So we’re delving with all this very dark period of American society that is obviously personal to me, and very upsetting. 

Cunanan as Character 

RM: We had the book that we optioned, “Vulgar Favors.” The thing about Cunanan was a mystery in many ways. The things that I was fascinated about is the creator-destroyer idea of Cunanan and Versace sort of were the same beginning. They came from immigrant families, they wanted to be famous, they wanted to be celebrated and one person did the work and took the risk, which was Versace, and one person didn’t, who was Cunanan. Cunanan was also a tragic story. He was lied to by his parents, specifically his father, who told them they were incredibly wealthy, almost royalty in the Philippines. And in his teenage years he discovered that his father had been lying the entire time. He was treated like a celebrity in his own family. When he was very young his parents gave him the master suite. So he sort of grew up with this kingly idea of who he was and who he could be. And then it was all taken away and he was shattered by it. And he had real psychological difficulties dealing with. There was also what we could never verify or prove, sexual abuse in his family. So he was also a very tragic figure and wanted fame and fortune so desperately that what happened with him was when he killed someone, the first victim, that probably was in a fit of pique and rage, he decided well, I’m going to go to jail, I’m going to be destroyed, so I want to be famous so I’m going to move towards that. And in taking the life of the famous person became his fame which is also a very American story that we see time and time again, that’s gotten progressively worse with social media over the years and threats and violence. When you have somebody like Cunanan, who is thought of in many circles as a monster, and the person that took away Gianni Versace from us, you also have to with the actor say, well let’s talk about his childhood. He was a real person. Something along the way made him snap. So we’ve talked a lot about that. And Darren did a lot of research on his own and showed up ready to go. 

Edgard Ramirez as Versace 

RM: Whenever I do something like this, or like O.J. or, I always have one person in mind that I think of, always. So, Darren was the obvious choice. I was friends with him. I knew him. And I wanted people to see something that I saw which was a great dramatic actor. In the case of Edgar, if you look at Edgar, Edgar looks exactly like Versace. When we have the prosthetic and the wig and can show you pictures it’s amazing. And Edgar has that sort of grandiose gravity as a human being that Versace had. And he was my only choice. And I met him. And I always have this thing when I give this really long, impassioned spiel, I’m going to die if you don’t do it. And at the end of the meeting I was, what do you think? And he was, well, let me think about it. I was, what? What do you mean? And then I was, ok I’m going to get you no matter what, and I did. And he met with Brad and Nina and loved them and I really pushed hard. And by the time I gave him a second script you can’t deny the power of the part. And he was, ok, I get it, I love it, I’ll do it. 

Ricky Martin as Versace’s Lover 

Ricky was another example of somebody that, people think of Ricky as “La Vida Loca” and a Vegas showman and he’s doing Sting. But Ricky is so soulful and intimate. And I just saw something in him. I’ve also worked with him once before. And you know the boyfriend, Antonio, was a very tragic figure because he was with Versace for 15 years and loved him and Versace was killed and he was out. He was thrown out of this palace and this life. And he had suicide attempts. And I thought, well I think Ricky could really go there and would want to do this. I met Ricky, I just called him up and said, can I talk to you? And I explained to him the role. And then I offered him the role. And at the end of the meeting we both got really teary because he didn’t tell me that he and Edgar were very close friends. And Edgar was, oh I want you to do this part so bad but I’m not going to, do that. 

Penelope Cruz as Donatella 

RM: was a little bit trickier because I obviously know and adore Gaga. And we briefly discussed it but she was doing “A Star Is Born” with Bradley Cooper, that’s basically shooting this whole year and I had to shoot the show this year. So then I was sort of thinking about people and I know Penelope because of Javier and “Eat, Pray, Love” and I spent a lot of time with them. And I just asked if I could speak with her. And she is friends with Donatella. And I thought that was a great in because she knew her, she would be an advocate for her. But again, she is an Oscar winning actress and a great one at that so I thought it would be interesting. And she said yes instantly too. So I had great luck with it. And I also love that for all of them, you’ll see a different side of them. You’ve never seen Penelope do something like that. You’ve certainly never seen Ricky Martin or Edgar do something like that. And it’s been exciting to see. 

Suprises: Versace was HIV+ 

We have a brilliant writer named Tom Rob Smith who’s writing the episode and has really taken an auteur approach to the material. And so he’s really immersed in it. And he’s constantly coming up with great nuggets that are surprising. I think the most devastating thing for me that I learned was that he had HIV and almost died. And at that time there was no cocktail. And he was really devastated because he was a person who loved life and he was trying to figure out a way to pass the company to Donatella because he was going to die. It was a death sentence. But miraculously, right around the time the cocktail had started to come back and he took the right cocktail of pills and got his health back. He felt he had so much left to say and then he was killed out on his steps that morning. He was creating again and designing again and he was crying all the time because his life had been given back to him. You can imagine for Donatella and Gianni and Antonio to have this second life, this great lion of a man was restored to vigor. And he was just snuffed out instantly with two bullets to the face. That was really devastating to me. 

Other Victims 

The Lee Miglin killing was just so barbaric and cruel and awful. He was a closeted gay man. And Cunanan did that and had such rage, obviously self-loathing, that he killed him in such a violent way. And then dressed him up as a woman with panties and lot of sex toys around so that his family would find this and be humiliated. We spent two days shooting that assassination. And it was really tough. The crew was crying and the actors were crying because it was the exact spot he was killed and you can feel him. Like, who does this in a room? And what else could he have done? He was taken so soon. And you can just imagine the gifts he would have given us. 

Actual Filming 

Every story has its own organic thing. So for this story we did a really cool thing, we’re starting the story with, the first 15 minutes are music, opera, no dialogue, and it’s Versace restored to health, getting up and starting his day with his staff and then walking to the News Café, intercut with Cunanan stalking him and tracking him. It starts with his murder. And then what we wanted to do was tell the story backwards. Versace was the last murder but in our show he’s the first. And then we go back in time. We tell the story backwards, ending with the Cunanan figure as a young man and Versace as a young man trying to make a stab of it as a designer. There’s only violence and murder in the first four or five episodes. And then you really get into the psychological struggle of how does one person become a creator and how does one become a destroyer. And then the last episode is Cunanan on the houseboat making a decision to kill himself before they arrest him. I’ve never done anything backwards. But I loved the storytelling of it because I think you’ll be so moved because it starts with a violent act and by the time you’ll get to the end you will really realize what Versace had to go through to become Versace and what Cunanan went through to become that killer. 

Donatella 

RM: We have had some contact with Donatella. I met Allegra when she was younger, she came to the “Glee” live tour. I was very excited to meet Allegra Versace. Donatella had been very kind and very lovely. As a mother she really has been very protective of her children. And that was really her only request was, which she conveyed to Penelope and thus to me, is she really wanted to make sure that her kids weren’t portrayed on screen and that there was nothing about them in the show. I’m a parent and I can understand, I don’t want them to see that and go through any pains. We removed them at her request. And I think it was the right thing to do. But that was it. She has been sort of hands off, and that was her only request. I’m sure it will be incredibly difficult to see. But in a weird way I hope that the family can see it because it really is a tribute to his genius. And also, she comes off incredibly well because it’s really a very modern idea about a woman who is the sister of a very famous person. She’s also creative but suddenly he’s dead and what do I do? Do I fold up the tent or do I keep the business alive? That was incredibly difficult for Donatella to do. And I think she did a very heroic job of it. She saved the company. She mobilized the family. She kept the business afloat and became a modern heroine.

[9r7g5h]

Remember All - P2

Fandom: Xena: Warrior Princess

Overall Rating: T+ (Rating subject to change); Chapter Rating: K  

Genre: General

Summary:   Given another chance, left with her memories of their first time through, Gabrielle knows there’s only one option for her- let Xena live. Whatever she had to do, whatever she had to change to make sure that would happen, Gabrielle was willing to do it.

Words: 4,258

AN: Ok, so, for the early years, there's not really much I would change? Like, there're some things of course, individual things here and there that could have gone differently, but as for plot? For the first two season, that's pretty simple, mainly because little happens that actually has far reaching effects. Season 3 are where most of the changes are going to pick up, so for now? Enjoy what little changes and keep your hats ready for future changes that shall come. Because that's going to be insane.

Disclaimer: I do not own Xena.

Part 1, Part 2, ???

She'd forgotten how Zeus damned annoying it was to be left behind all the time.

Gabrielle remembered, of course- she remembered everything about the first time she had lived through this life. But there was a difference between remembering the event and living through it. Remembering the annoyance and worry and slight twinge of fear for her new found friend and living through it all, all while resisting the urge to strangle the warrior the next time she saw her.

Gabrielle understood, of course. As far as Xena knew, she was little more than a child, a young woman who had joined up with a fearsome ex-warlord for the adventure of it. It was Xena's job to protect her, to keep her safe, to make sure she lived to see another day. Xena didn't know what Gabrielle did; she didn't know what they had been through together, what they would go through in this life, didn’t know how strong Gabrielle truly was. And while Gabrielle understood, it hurt.

She'd been tempted, ever since that first night, to tell Xena about the future. To just lay it all out, to put everything on the line and let Xena make the decision. Let her make the call about whether or not to trust her, to skip forward to where their relationship had left off, to not worry about the hundreds of things that would go wrong because now they would go right. Oh, had she been tempted.

But Gabrielle held back. Xena wasn't ready, and to push forward, to try and force what would come naturally if she just waited? It would ruin everything. So Gabrielle held onto the role Xena had put her in, allowing the dice to fall where she already knew they would.

But it was beyond annoying, especially when, for the third time that week, Xena left her in a tavern and left to make sure it was safe.

Especially since Gabrielle knew what was coming. She knew about the arrow wound Xena would receive, knew about the warlord's son she herself was going to have to flirt with later in order to get him to change sides, she knew it all. And to just sit there and wait was killing her.

So, like Gabrielle had taken to doing the last few times Xena had left her alone, she trained.

It wasn't anything obvious, no. As much as Gabrielle wanted a sword or her sais back in her hands, those were too out of place, too noticeable. Xena would see them, would ask too many questions, would make things too awkward and force out the explanation from her. All things she was trying to avoid. So she trained with a staff; those were easy enough to come by, given a few minutes in the woods and some large enough trees. Every time she was alone, she had managed to find a decent replacement for her old staff relatively quickly, allowing her to get in some time training before Xena returned.

It felt nice, having a weapon in her hands again, after so long. After so many months of being soft, of the most dangerous thing in her hands being her eating knife, she could feel herself getting strong again. It would take years to rehone the skills she had learned, to regain the abilities she had lost, but Gabrielle already knew she could do them, that she would have them again, and knowing, as Xena had once told her, was already half the battle.

So she trained, and when the warlord's son arrived, she went back into the tavern to flirt with him, and when a few days later, Xena found out about him, she silently accepted the scolding Xena gave her about men (all while biting her tongue. Because she knew exactly what Xena's taste in men were, and she had no room to speak). Gabrielle allowed what happened to happen, and whenever Xena left her behind, she just kept training.

It was easier than she thought to change things. She had thought it would be hard, trying to figure out how to shift and shape the world around them to fit her needs, her knowledge of the future only telling her one of the paths she could take. But it was surprisingly easy.

When she was kidnapped by the priests of Morpheus, she already knew what she had to do to stall for time. She kept the battles going longer, dragged out those couple of extra seconds and minutes and hours Xena needed, and Xena saved the day, easily as could be.

It was easy to prove that Xena hadn't killed any of the men near the village, because no men were ever killed. When Xena mentioned the town they would be passing by, Gabrielle just ever so casually mentioned going a different route, a shortcut that would get them through the mountain range in just a few hours, instead of the two days going the normal route would take. When questioned, Gabrielle had just referenced her studies of maps, and Xena had accepted it, leading them in the opposite direction, high into the hills on a path that did, technically, get them out of the range faster than if they had gotten caught up in Ares' plan. And from the hill, Gabrielle watched as the travelers got home safely, tiny little specks that saw no interference as they returned to their town.

She protected the people from the titans by just never offering to read the scrolls, leaving them all to believe the magic just wasn't there. She protested Xena trying to die to save Prometheus, and managed to keep Iolaus from getting hurt. The former had Xena hesitating just enough to get them all to figure out some other answer that didn't involve Xena getting kidnapped by a giant flying lizard and falling from a thousand feet in the air, and the latter just helped. Helped Hercules and Xena fight off the creatures that had hatched from the eggs, helped them all be there to free Prometheus, helped to save the world.

When she saw Perdicas in Troy, it was easy to realize what she felt, this time. She loved him, yes, loved him like the brother she had never had, the brother and best friend he had been to her before their parents had decided they were to marry. She saw the man he had become, and even knowing what it would do to him, she was proud that he had tried to change his fate, had struck out on his own to realize what the world could be. But the kiss she gave him was on the cheek, a promise to catch up again soon and send letters if she could and if he ever went back to Potidea, and that was that.

Living life in hindsight was a blessing and a curse, it seemed. The chance to fix everything, to understand why things had gone the way they had, but even with the changes, powerless to stop it all, overall.

Because some things were the same- she still threw herself over Terreis, protecting her when the arrows fell but unable to stop the first of them, making her a princess. Though she was able to change Ephiny's opinion of her, Ephiny’s face as she used her own staff to knock her on her ass a priceless sight, especially since the Amazons' opinion of her had been so low to begin with- a seemingly defenseless villager Xena had been refusing to train having defeated a warrior who had been training since she was four. She still left for Athens, some curious part of her wondering, after so many years of practice, how much better she would be (the officiator was sobbing by the time she finished, barely able to speak, and the headmaster begged on his knees for her to stay when she left to meet up with Xena) and a desire to see her old friends once more. People she had thought about fondly in her travels, even if she never seen them again.

She still got Xena and Diana confused those first few days they stayed in the palace after the assassination attempt had been uncovered, unused to seeing a double wandering around after so long of there just being Xena. It still hurt, listening to Xena and Marcus that night, the two of them believing her asleep- hurt to hear her soulmate with another, even if Marcus was probably the one man in Xena's life actually deserving of her. One of the few Gabrielle could fully approve of, if Xena's inclination had gone towards him staying.  And even though she knew it was tolmic poison on that dart and that Xena would be fine, that she would awaken and save the day, the sight of her best friend, her soul mate, lying still on that table?

Gabrielle still broke, still found herself screaming in the woods as she beat a tree with her staff, because Xena seemed dead, and the last time Xena had been dead, Gabrielle had burned her. Burned her and lost her and in the process lost everything.

She still allowed herself to get captured by Callisto's men, though more for Joxer than anything else. He was her friend, the other brother she had never had, and just like she expected, when Callisto asked him to cut her throat, he balked. Xena saved her, just like she always had, and Gabrielle found herself safe and sound once again, secretly excited for their next meeting with Joxer. At least before he fell in love with her, he had been fun to hang around and goof off with, and as for the crush? Well, she had a plan for that this time.

And Gabrielle still found herself in the middle of that war. She couldn't even think about getting Xena to change course- Ephiny was there, needed their help, and Gabrielle had almost insisted on them following that path. And Gabrielle hadn't cared that it was suspicious if she was able to lead them directly to where Ephiny had been hiding; she still did, running before Xena despite the warrior's frantic, terrified yells for her to stop and come back, because her sister was in trouble. Gabrielle still found herself leaving the safety of the temple, to save that boy, something she actually succeeded in doing this time- she took an arrow through her thigh as well as a sword to her chest, but still she saved him. Saved him with just a broken nose and a gash above his eye, saved him and took him home.

She still found herself dying, dead, in the Elysian fields, greeted by her family. Family that knew- the gods knew what had happened, apparently, had seen it all in the Fate's newly fixed loom all those months ago when the repeat had begun, and were just waiting. Just waiting to see what she would do, how she would change the future, whether or not her knowledge of what was to come would be enough.

Found herself cradled in Xena's arms as she began to breathe once again, Hades allowing her to return with a gentle smile and a quiet wish of "Good luck." Found Xena crying over her, tears she longed to reach up and kiss away but unable, just too weak to move. Found herself slipping into sleep as Xena hovered protectively over her, the war finally over, making sure no more harm would come.

Her wounds were worse this time. Not just the slash to her chest, but the muscles in her thigh had torn as well, especially after carrying the boy back to the temple. She would have a limp for a good long while, though none of them, Xena or the priests, had believed it would be permanent. Just something that would heal, that would fade over time as she recovered. An annoyance, and something Xena deemed bad enough to delay them at the temple for another week while she healed, but still, Gabrielle was sure she came out none the worse for the wear. And she saved him, had saved that little boy.

Just like she planned on saving Solan.

It hurt, seeing him. She had known there would be pain- even the slightest thought of him, of what had happened, had been enough to start the ache in her heart. But to see him, to listen to him speak, even as he all but cursed Xena? It hurt more than she ever could have realized that it would.

He was one of the things she was going to fix. She was going to change his future, would make sure that he would grow up into a wonderful young man, that he would get the destiny her daughter had stolen from him. Watching as he ran off, as Xena talked to Kaleipus, Gabrielle swore right then and there that she would fix it all.

She had to let herself be bitten by the bacchae- there was no other way, not to stop Bacchus, at least. No other way to get Xena to change, though this time it was different. She had more control, almost, as if her previous life as one of the creatures kept her mind from being overwhelmed. Together, she and Xena killed the god, saved the girls- and for a moment Gabrielle began to panic. This was the first god of how many Xena would kill in her lifetime? How many more would die by her hand, and how many more would try to kill them?

If she had her way, none. Of that, Gabrielle was sure.

It was easy to say no to Perdicas this time, now that she knew. Because he needed her, by the gods, did he need her. But she didn't love him, not the way he wanted her to, and she needed Xena more. She needed her, needed her like the world needed the sun, and so she said no. Said no to his initial proposal, said no to the second time he asked- she couldn't love him, not the way he needed her to, so she said no.

She was still going to take him home, though, still going to make sure he got there safely. A couple of days of them talking, she hoped, would help. And there were plenty of women in Potediea, quite a few who longed for him, and Gabrielle was sure he would find happiness there. So she and Xena made plans on where to meet, if Gabrielle returned back towards the area before Xena finished catching Callisto and could meet up with them, and they left. Left with a long hug and a promised good bye, so very different from the kiss and promise to come visit that had initiated their departure in the first world.

"You love her, don't you? That's why you won't marry me."

All Gabrielle could do was nod and watch as Perdicas, surprisingly, smiled. She had been expecting a scowl, at least, the most common reaction, in both worlds, from people who took the step towards assuming she and Xena were lovers. But Perdicas just smiled, a small, sad smile.

"Does she make you happy?"

"More than anything in the world."

They continued on like that as they walked, side by side, discussing Gabrielle's adventures, talking through his experienced with war. It was hard, sometimes; sometimes his voice would shake and falter, his skin paling as he remembered what he had done, the world around him spinning as he froze mid-step and got caught up in the memories of what had happened. Episodes that passed, eventually, leaving him trying to laugh them off as he drank from the offered waterskin, but painful events that tugged at her heart.

She wanted to love him, wanted to be the woman he wanted her to be, but she couldn't. And knowing what she knew this life, Gabrielle couldn't pretend.

But she could protect him, and make sure he lived to find the woman who could.

She had thought they would be safe- leaving a day earlier than they had before, walking through much of the darkness until the road became too dangerous to continue; at least an entire twelve hours ahead of Callisto, before she ever realized that Xena had left their little group, leaving them exposed. She had thought it would be safe, that it would all be ok, that Xena would be able to take care of her and they would be done.

Callisto rounded the corner behind them in a fury of steel and sand, Xena and Argo right on her heels, the chakram arching through the air towards her hand as it slashed down, a killing blow aimed right for his neck.

It fell on her back instead, a diagonal slash that seared itself from her shoulder to her hip before the chakram could reach Callisto’s wrist, one of the few times the weapon had been too slow. A wound that sent her sprawling as twin voices screamed her name, as Callisto rode off as Xena came to a halt besides her, falling from Argo as she scrambled to get to her side.

It wasn't deep, thank the gods, just a flesh wound that had missed her spine. It would scar, Xena had determined, after it had cleaned and stitched and covered in a poultice that would drive away infections, but it would heal. And with time the scar would soften and fade, and just like everything else, it would be left in the past.

The worst of the lasting damage was that she would need a new shirt.

Xena asked her to go home that night, after Perdicas had fallen into an uneasy sleep. Asked her to leave her for good, to go home and live a safe life. She had almost lost her twice, had seen her bloodied and stitched up and thought she was dead twice in the span of just a few short weeks. So Xena asked her to go home. She didn't care what she did there- write, get married and raise children, become a hoarder of cat related paraphernalia; Xena just wanted her safe, and home would be so.

It hurt, levering herself up into a sitting position; doable, her wounds treated enough that Gabrielle would be able to do a slow walk, or even ride Argo as she healed if they kept to a gentle pace, but still painful. But Gabrielle still did, despite Xena's protest that she should stay laying on her stomach, so that Gabrielle could be face to face with Xena when she spoke.

Xena had told her once that she knew she loved her after she almost lost her in the temple. That she had kept her feelings to herself for the longest time out of fear- fear that Gabrielle wouldn't feel the same, fear that she would never be deserving of her, fear in general for Gabrielle's life, if she let her love for her be know. So even though this was earlier than before, earlier than it had been in the last world, where Gabrielle hadn't realized her feelings for Xena until after she had lost her on that mountain, Gabrielle felt no fear of her own. No hesitation. Not when it was finally time.

Gabrielle leaned forward and kissed Xena, a soft, gentle kiss that had the other woman staring at her in wonder, in shock, her eyes wide and mouth slightly agape even as Gabrielle smiled and laughed. Smiled and laughed and said, in a soft little voice- "I can't go home. I love you."

Xena was quick to recover, hands reaching out to help lower Gabrielle back down onto the furs, rearranging the light cloth they had draped over her back to protect it from the slightly chilled night air. She smoothed back Gabrielle's bangs, leaning down to place a quick kiss onto her forehead before pulling back, putting some space between them.

Gabrielle wanted to protest when she heard Xena mutter something about the pain herbs and sleep talking, but Xena had a point- she felt like she was floating, the pain in her back gone, sleep just waiting for her on the horizon. So she closed her eyes and allowed herself to drift, planning to talk with Xena tomorrow.

Tomorrow didn't come, not in the way she expected. She woke up to Xena gone, Perdicas asking- no, begging- one more time that she come home with him, not even to get married but just to be safe, and the exact knowledge of where Xena would be.

It burned, moving, the stitches in her back tugging as she forced herself up and on, holding tightly onto her staff as she hobbled along, ignoring Perdicas' pleas. She had to get to Xena, had to make sure she was alright; even though the plan had always been for Xena to go alone, for Gabrielle to get Perdicas somewhere safe, she hadn't actually thought it would come down to this. To Xena going off after her alone, trying to end Callisto without backup, without her besides her. Even if in the last life Gabrielle had been tied to a stake, about to die for her attempt on Callisto herself, Xena still hadn't had to face her creation alone.

He tried to stop her, and for his troubles Perdicas ended up lying on the side of the road after all, only this time with an egg shaped lump on his skull, courtesy of her staff, instead of a gaping wound from Callisto's sword. It only took a single blow to fell him, and Gabrielle kept on, ignoring the burning in her back, the blood she could feel leaking down and wetting the top of her skirt, making the loose, makeshift shirt Xena had fashioned for her to wear stick to her skin.

They found her soon enough, Callisto's men, and they took her to her. Took her to where Callisto and Xena were waiting, Xena tied into that chair, Joxer having taken her place in an attempt to get revenge against Callisto and subsequently getting caught. Callisto just laughed, surprised that Gabrielle had survived, and tied her to the stake as well.

Just like last time, Xena broke free, though Xena never went far from where Joxer had hustled her after the two of them had been freed. She couldn't fight, not like this, not with her back burning and her head spinning. Not that she cared- she had had worse, in the other world, and she had survived. So she tried, striking out with her staff at any who came near, either knocking them out or knocking them into Xena's sword, ending them as they tried to end her.

All while Callisto watched. Watched and laughed as her men died, observed Xena's protective movements, made an attempt for Gabrielle herself, her sword once again poised to fall and-

And froze, her face twisted in shock as she looked down at the blade that poked from between her ribs, her own sword clattering to the ground as Callisto turned. Turned and faced the rage in Xena's eyes, the last shred of goodness, of possible forgiveness, gone. Because Callisto had already tried to hurt Gabrielle twice, had succeeded once, and Xena was determined to never let it happen again.

They still burned a body that night, Xena determined to see to the end of the creature she had had a hand in making. But this time Perdicas stood beside them, nursing his head wound, his expression unreadable. When they offered to take him home, really take him home this time, he refused. He was thankful, of course, gracious for the offer, but still he turned them down. He wanted to take his time, to see if the world could have a peaceful light, before he went back to his childhood home.

Xena insisted they stay in the village a while longer, just enough to make sure her back was ok- an unnecessary precaution, after those first few days. Her back had turned into a mass of scabs that pulled and broke whenever she moved too quickly, but just like with her previous injury, if she walked slowly, if she kept her footing stable as they walked, she could move without too much discomfort.

Xena didn't bring up the kiss, and Gabrielle didn't press it, letting her friend believe her confession had been the result of the herbs they had used to ease her initial pain. Instead Gabrielle focused on helping Xena through her nightmares- Callisto's own taunts from the afterlife, the renewed fear Xena seemed to have about losing her, tormented thoughts that kept Xena awake long after she should have let sleep take her. So Gabrielle focused on those; little touches and soft words to remind her that she was alive and well, healing fast, pointing out that what she had done was to protect her.

There was no guilt there, not this time; Xena had done what she had done out of love, to protect her friend, not because she had just chosen to let Callisto die. It took a couple of weeks, Xena growing almost haggard before they began to falter, but soon enough they left. The nightmares faded, she began to sleep again, and, for now, because Gabrielle was sure Callisto would find a way back into the world, but for now, they were ok.

For now. 

[princeandvanitydotnet-blog]

Prince and Denise - What's This Strange Relationship

New Post has been published on http://princeandvanity.net/prince-and-denise-whats-this-strange-relationship/

Prince and Denise - What's This Strange Relationship

An excerpt from Denise’s book “Blame It On Vanity” was posted by Denise on her Facebook in September 2012. If you ever wondered about Prince’s Strange Relationship song, here’s what Denise had to say in her book.

Metaphorically speaking!

Chapter 21

So shall I be thrown back in time to speak of the adolescent scuffling, of many a juvenile heart, the competitiveness that strikes like the claws of a cat or the tall tale being somewhat of a novice now told with less enthusiasm, having been coughed up by gossiping proficients, professing insane truths, having sucked it out of a bottle? Not being accustomed to strutting with a steel heart, my tears roared out and poured down like rain and I missed terribly a life of which I had not yet beheld. Who and what was I becoming and to whom did I belong? And what of the piercing screams of dialogue gone rotten, and, arguments pushed away like leftovers in a moldy box? It was needful to live through life’s galloping changes grouped to a people that were growing, cutting back our stinkweed; falling down but waiting to be watered and having an unquenchable thirst for stardom. One remembers the pleasures, if one verily agreed with the pleasure. Most assuredly; and do bear with me a little in my past folly however with folly henceforth came my brokenhearted-ness and the dismantling of the titled song, “What’s This Strange Relationship.”

-Denise-

Blame It On Vanity 

Visit the  Blame It On Vanity  official website to order Denise’s Blame It On Vanity book… read more.

    Strange Relationship Lyrics – 1987

“Strange Relationship”

I guess U know me well, I don’t like winter But I seem 2 get a kick out of doing U cold Oh, what the hell, U always surrender What’s this strange relationship that we hold on 2? Baby I just can’t stand 2 see U happy More than that I hate 2 see U sad Honey if U left me I just might do something rash What’s this strange relationship? (ship, ship, ship)I came and took your love, I took your body I took all the self respect U ever had I took U 4 a ride and baby I’m sorry The more U love me sugar, the more it makes me madBaby I just can’t stand 2 see U happy More than that I hate 2 see U sad Honey if U left me I just might do something rash What’s this strange relationship? (ship, ship, ship)Isn’t it a shame this ain’t a movie Then U could rewrite my every line I’ll take all the blame, yo baby I’m sorry But I didn’t like the way U where, so I had 2 make U mineBaby I just can’t stand 2 see U happy More than that I hate 2 see U sad Honey if U left me I just might do something rash What’s this strange relationship? (ship, ship, ship)

Mmmmm, my strange relationship Can’t live with U, can’t live without U That’s all about.. Do U know? (strange relationship) I think U and I got a (strange relationship) What’s this strange relationship? Yeah, yeah [repeated to fade]

These lyrics were obtained from: AZ Lyrics website.

Prince and the Princess

Prince and Denise on Rolling Stone Magazine cover

Prince and Denise/Vanity, being nearly the same age, were both young and free back in the early 80s. They came into each other lives at a time when Prince was close to his prime in super-stardom and Denise was trying to get there. She once said in an interview with Donnie Simpson in 1985 that she never thought she was a good singer. She wasn’t a Diana Ross or an Aretha Franklin, but that she wouldn’t have gotten into the business if she didn’t think there was some talent there. She was quite the talented and creative artist, writer, actor, and most importantly, became a dedicated woman of God. Even though they were, at some point in their lives, not just deeply in love, their love/hate relationship was intense. They were both headstrong individuals who believed to be one another in another life. Denise stated that they were so close it became scary.

Did you know that Denise originally wrote the lyrics for Nasty Girls and that Prince added on to the lyrics? This information I read from the content that her brother-in-law shared that belonged to Denise and was in Denise’s handwriting.

I just couldn’t imagine such a closeness between Prince and Denise, where she even stated that their shadows measured to be the same, as well! They were one another in another life, they were practically attached to each other, she was rumored to have tried on his coat when he first met her and it was a perfect fit, they felt they were each other’s mirror–hence the name he christened her: Vanity, they lived parallel lives throughout the years, had the same creative style… Really, how close can you get?

I’ve read where some have stated that Denise said they (her and Prince) have waken before from having the same dream. I’ve read plenty rumors that I cannot confirm to be accurate–including a rumor that Prince was trying to get back with Denise even into the 90s. That information went from this world when Prince and Denise passed and is only known to God. Some things are better left that way and gone with the wind.

I’ve read many of places about songs that Vanity inspired that Prince had written–including songs such as: Strange Relationship, When Doves Cry, a portion of Purple Rain, Adore, The Beautiful Ones, and many more that were recorded during their time together (Dirty Mind era/Controversy era/1999 era/Purple Rain era) .

Dez Dickerson – My Time With Prince

According to Dez’s book: My Time With Prince (released in 2003), Prince was so involved with Vanity he felt that Prince was putting Vanity before his very own, longtime band. So, it goes like this—Vanity came in and changed Prince in such a way that didn’t sit well with Dez, apparently. It has also been rumored that others took a disliking to Denise or was jealous of Denise because it was like Denise came in among a tight-knit, well-talented band that were like best friends with Prince, and Prince hardly knew Denise, before all of a sudden, she was christened Vanity and it was him and Vanity against the world. Prince had gotten himself a second traveling bus for him and his newfound lover to smooch on–you know, a tad bit more privacy away from prying eyes. He later broke up with the beautiful Susan Moonsie to be with Vanity.

He was so in love with Vanity he had to have been hit by several of cupid’s arrows, the moment he saw Denise in 80/81 American Music Awards. I am not sure of the AMA date, but it was stated on Denise’s obituary that they met in 1980 at the American Music Awards. Denise also stated that Prince was tenaciously pursuing her and calling her agent often to get her to be with him. Our man was trying hard. Can’t knock him for loving the women.

Back to Dez’s book… I cannot say if what Dez felt was justifiable or not, but nonetheless, he clearly seem to have been hurt by it at some point. I believe he’s pass that by now, of course.

Please take note that those words I used regarding Dez’s book were my own way of putting it from Dez’s words. I did not quote his book verbatim. I repeat, those were NOT Dez’s exact words in his book.

As Prince stated during his Denise tribute on his Piano and a Microphone tour–they were deeply in love with one another and as much as they love they fought.

Can’t stand to be with you, can’t stand to be without you.

What a strange relationship it was.

  However deep their love was, Denise wanted to reach her dreams as much as Prince wanted to reach/live his. In her eyes, she had to make the decision to let go of the only person she ever loved, the person she loved deeply, so that she could pursue the dreams she had for Denise, to take the next step towards her reaching her dreams. This, according to Denise, could not have happened had she chose to stay for Purple Rain and Prince.

Mayte Garcia – The Most Beautiful

According to Mayte’s The Most Beautiful book, Prince stated to Mayte that Vanity asked for more money to do Purple Rain (Denise said in an interview that she was offered just 5,000 to do the lead in Purple Rain) and when he didn’t agree with what she wanted, she said she wasn’t doing the movie and quit… broke his heart. Denise stated in an interview that she asked for more money because she needed an excuse to leave Prince. Denise, whom was the original star cast of Purple Rain (Prince and Vanity love-story that Appollonia took on in Purple Rain after Vanity), alongside of Prince, had chosen to leave Prince and Purple Rain to set a path–a path she said she always wanted to take towards becoming who she wanted to be. No purple but plenty of rain must’ve followed. It was pouring hard for dear Vanity. She admitted to wanting to die during her heavy cocaine use days. She was lost, deep with anger from her past, and was never happy–that is, until God came in and intervened on that day she was in the emergency room and nearly lost her life. That day changed Denise forever.

Prince Interview – Jet Magazine1997

“Everyone thought I was going to marry Vanity. She is where I am… connected with her spirit.“

Prince – Jet Magazine

One can only assume what this meant to Prince. To me, however, this means he truly wanted to marry her at some point and others knew so, as well. But, when I think of what it meant to Denise, I believe that she was purely focus on living for Christ. She had shed her Vanity character and, as Prince once stated about himself, she didn’t want to look back nor go back to Vanity. Yes, Denise loved Prince with a deep passion but God was more… so much more. She felt that God is what brought her happiness, that God was the reason for her being able to forgive the ones that wronged and abused her, for being able to live through her near death experience, that resulted from the overuse of cocaine, and that it was by God’s grace that she lived over 23 more years without a kidney inside of her. Denise was dearly devoted to Christ and her Christianity. Rightfully so. Prince later became a Jehovah Witness and was reportedly so until the end, as far I I know.

A few things anyone must consider, when it involved Prince and Denise

Denise might have (might have) chose not to marry Prince because she was focused on her life with Christ. It seems this would explain why Prince and Denise didn’t marry and/or why he stated to Jet Magazine that everyone thought he was going to marry Vanity but she was connected with her spirit. In my eyes, I see Denise deciding against any marriage proposal from Prince (if there was one) because of her religion alone. She stated before that God was her husband. This did not negate the fact that she loved Prince. It is possible she simply loved God more, that she didn’t see a future such as marriage between her and Prince, and chose to remain friends-only with him. She had already married and divorced a professional football player that turned for the worse before the interview Prince did with Jet took place. Denise may have decided marriage wasn’t for her. No one will ever know for certain.

I do not believe it was ever about what Prince wanted when it involved marrying Denise. Many have asked if Denise was the one Prince loved more than the other women, or was the one that held his heart, if they were soulmates, why didn’t he marry her? No one, it seems, thought about if it was Denise who chose not to marry Prince, instead of the other way around. Denise was already deeply devoted to God before Prince chose to live the Christian life. She stated she left her past behind. She said that she was no longer Vanity and she was out of the music industry and film industry for good. Prince was still there. This would have likely interfered with Denise’s plans to leave it all behind for the sake of living purely for Christ. Could you imagine an Evangelist married to a man that was still strutting around with that pop-and-lock and spouting those sultry, te amo, mi amor lyrics about what he can do for a woman? I haven’t necessarily contemplated whether his performance was of any approval towards any Christians–but I do believe, sincerely, that Denise wouldn’t have been ok with that. Prince stated in an interview that his musical talent was a God-given gift that he was not going to stop doing.

Prince and Denise were not entirely with the same beliefs when it involved Christianity. To my understanding, a Jehovah Witness does not believe in hell, whereas in Denise’s religion, she believed in Satan and hell. Denise’s religion believes in the God-given of speaking in tongues, whereas Jehovah Witnesses do not. There are several conflicts between the two religions. And with that, I do not see how a marriage between them would have worked. I doubt either were going to let go of each other’s religion for another. They were both too deeply involved in their religion. Simply put, it wasn’t meant to be–no more than with the women he proposed to and didn’t marry, not even with the two women that he did marry because they divorced. Prince and Denise were brought into each  other’s lives for a reason–be it a reason only God knows.

  Prince and Denise’s love/hate relationship they’ve both admitted to having was indeed a Strange Relationship.

  I have much love for both Prince and Denise and wish them both heaven.

      PrinceAndVanity.net Administrator

Please know that I am not a Prince/Vanity “stan“. I did not create this website because I believe Denise was his one, true love, or that they were soulmates or “mirrored” each other. I do not have an educated knowledge about soulmates nor astronomy-related stuff that I’ve seen people discussing, but I do believed a lot of things they did, for whatever reason, parallel each other. However, this is not why this website exist. I created this website in support for Prince and in support for Denise, not in support of a love interest. Prince already stated to the world what he and Denise were to one another and Denise stated so as well. This website does not exist to convince you of what you (if you are familiar with Prince and Denise) should already know. I’ve no doubt about what I already feel in my heart that I know. What I know is that Prince and Denise loved one another deeply, I do know that Prince and Denise did communicate for a while after their breakup during the Purple Rain era, I do know that Prince and Denise will never be forgotten. I do not favor any one person that was involved with Prince over another. I truly believe Prince had some love for every one he was in a relationship with. I believe that these people that were in his life were all beautiful in their own way inside/out.

  Writing

I studied in college to become a novelist. I later changed my interest from Literature to studying for a degree in Medical Science (Medical Sonography) and later that changed to studying in Graphic Design, Web Development and Photography. Yes, I was indecisive but interested in each subject. I couldn’t pursue all, so I had to give up some, unfortunately. In other words, I have no degree in Literature and is a bit rusty with my editing, so to speak. However, I am a writer and love to write. There are plenty writers out there in this world, but I’ve yet to find a book by an  author written about Prince with a decent amount of content written about Denise. Denise may have been in the spotlight for a brief time, but she was indeed a huge part of Prince during his prime in the Purple Rain era and before he made it to stardom–dating back to the Dirty Mind era. Purple Rain contained some details about Prince’s real life situations that he was involved in with his parents, with his band, with his proteges… with Vanity.

  A Mission

I intend to write about Denise, as much as I can, and what I can about her history from the start (before Prince, during, and after) in as much detail as I can gather and will do so over time (only with any help and input from anyone with valid knowledge and is willing to add their input). In honesty, I cannot do this alone. Yet, I feel like I must write because I do feel that her story deserves justice. There are books out there from authors that are not delivering accurate information about Denise or is either misleading readers or purposely wrote the book in favor of particularly people that were involved in Prince’s life. Alex Hahn and Laura Tiebert is an example of such authors. Nikki Sixx even exaggerated on some information regarding Denise, according to Tommy Lee. There are also many ex-lovers of Prince, who have had a brief fling with him, one being a Mi-Ling Stone Poole , evin+Devasquez&ie=utf-8&oe=utf-8″>Devin Devasquez, and God knows who else, adding their portion (some from a second-hand source) into the clan of old-friends-for-sale–getting while the getting is hot. Denise was not this.

You will not find such information in Denise’s book that paints Prince in a bad light such as Mayte Garcia’s book. Denise never went on a forum and spilling everything there is to spill about Prince’s sexual life, how he is in bed, or what size he is, such as what Robin Power has done. I do not have anything against people choosing to tell their story in return for monetary gain–as long as their story being told is the truth, nothing but the truth, and nothing but the whole truth. Could one assume second-hand input to be the whole truth or maybe a half of the truth? If I chose to write about Denise, I do not want nothing but the truth. Being that Denise didn’t give away the gossip that some people wanted her to do, such as a tell-all book that she was offered a heavily sum of money to do, there is room for others to just speculate and throw out whatever rumors that want about her.

Denise’s life should not be remembered as someone that Prince briefly slept with that became a cocaine addict. What comes to your mind if someone speaks about Vanity or Denise? You think of the Rolling Stone Magazine cover that a lot of people are throwing on t-shirts, in art, shoes, cups, and the likes? Some even had the nerve to say she lost it all when she became a Christian. What? Denise’s life did not begin and end with Prince. Denise was already a star before Prince. She had already played characters in movies before she met Prince. She also had a beautiful life of her own, filled with happiness, after she became closer to God. A good start to knowing Denise and the life she had as Vanity is right on the Blame It On Vanity website. Check it out!

My self-motivational interest in writing about Denise is entirely voluntary–filled with upmost inspiration from what I’ve learned thus far about Denise.

  I thank you for taking the time to read this article I posted on the www.princeandvanity.net website.

  One Love

  Images were obtained from: Ebony.com/Pinterest.com/WennerMedia.com (Rolingstone.com Prince/Vanity iconic magazine cover)/Amazon.com

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