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koraki-pharmakis · 3 years

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10 Myths About Hellenismos

Today, let's address some popular myths (and the truths) about Hellenismos and its deities. Not very surprisingly, most of these things come from Wicca or Christian colonization. You can believe these things if you want, they just aren't from the religion.

Myth 1: Deity work is dangerous

Truth: Deity work, in Hellenismos, isn't any more dangerous than worshiping the Christian god is supposed to be. This notion didn't originate in Hellenismos, and is also a largely neopagan idea. Our theoi aren't monsters or aggressive. They won't kill you over tiny mistakes. Just respect them, do what you can, and you'll be fine.

Remember that even in the mythos, people aren't smited for the wrong offering. They're smited for blatant and deliberate disrespect, which by nature can't be done accidentally.

Our deities genuinely aren't easily angered. They wont be mad if you reach out to them, if you confuse them for something else, if you give them the wrong offering, etc.

Myth 2: You need to look out for entities impersonating deities

Truth: Again, this isn't remotely from Hellenismos. Our gods cannot be impersonated by evil entities. Frankly, we don't really have entities with that desire or power in the religion. If you're contacting a Hellenic deity, and you get an affirmative response, you contacted them. The idea you didn't, or that something else is lying to you, is from outside the religion. Our deities are more powerful than random ghosts, and our religion doesn't have that concept.

Myth 3: Hekate is a moon goddess/crone

Truth: Hekate is associated with the moon, but she is not a goddess of the moon. She is the goddess of one lunar phase--the dark moon, which is on the eve of Hekate's Deipnon. She is also not a crone goddess outside of neopaganism and Wicca. Historically, she was depicted as a maiden. Her triple form was also not maiden/mother/crone, simply a triple maiden-esque figure.

Myth 4: Hestia gave her seat to Dionysos/Apollon took Helios's chariot

Truth: Honestly, it's just a difference in counting. Some deities were and weren't Olympians depending on time, culture, and locations. No seats on Olympos were "given up," it's just that sometimes one is there and sometimes the other isn't.

As for the chariot, no. Apollon didn't replace Helios. They were synchronized, but Apollon didn't "take" the chariot, and Helios was never removed. Helios is still the sun--his name is literally "sun."

Myth 5: The myths are history/Hellenic Polytheists believe in the myths

Truth: The characters in myths are real to us, and some myths are literal, but in general, Hellenic mythology is not meant to be taken fully literally. Most of it is symbolic. Additionally, a lot of the r*pe in the mythos is translation errors. We believe in our heroes and our gods, and we believe there is truth in the myths, but no, our mythology isn't like Christian mythology--it's not expected or really encouraged to believe the myths are strictly true history. The myths aren't even consistent over time and location, so it's simply impossible to believe in all of them at once. But no, our gods do not act the way they do in mythology. Myths are by and for mortals, and do not capture the divine.

Myth 6: It's disrespectful to dress up as or write fiction about the gods

Truth: This is just ridiculous and ahistoric. The majority of Ancient Greek theater was deity cosplay and fanfiction. I said what I said.

This can definitely be done disrespectfully, but isn't inherently disrespectful. You also aren't required to represent the theoi fully accurately in this.

Myth 6: X god is Y orientation/gender

Truth: While you can certainly theorize our theoi's sexuality, and none of our gods are cishet by modern standards, none of the gods can only be interpreted as one gender or orientation. The terms we ascribe to them are based on mythos, portrayals, and modern interpretation of historic social roles.

The most common of these theories are maiden goddesses as aroace (ie. Hestia, Athena, Artemis), erastes (top) gods as bi men (ie. Zeus, Apollon, Patroklos), eromenos (bottom) gods as gay men (ie. Ganymedes, Hyakinthos, Akhilleus), and Artemis as a lesbian.

None of these are wrong, to be clear. It's just not as simple as using our modern labels for them. Erastes and eromenos were both considered straight in Ancient Greece; being a 'virgin' didn't always mean celibate; Artemis can be interpreted as bi, lesbian, and/or aroace based on her myths. You can interpret them however you like--I certainly interpret my gods as queer--but there is no single right answer.

Myth 7: You need a patron or to be devoted to someone, or can only have one patron/be devoted to one god, & devotion is an oath

Truth: Patron deities are more of a principle in neopaganism and Wicca than in Hellenismos. Worshiping the theoi does not require you to find a patron or devote to a deity, ever. Patronage is not particularly important or common, unless you are thinking of a patron god of a trade (ie. if you're a blacksmith your patron is Hephaistos).

Devotion is also not exclusive, and never requires an oath. Oaths in Hellenismos are extremely serious, and should never be taken without extreme caution. If you aren't willing to die if you break the oath, don't make it--find something else. You probably wont die, but that's the necessary level of certainty. Devotion, while serious, is not as serious as being oath-bound. You can be devoted to multiple deities, and devotion can be called off if needed. You can't really call off an oath.

Myth 8: X god is a r*pist!

Truth: Please stop it. Just stop it. No. Especially if you're basing that on Lore Olympus. The mythology isn't fact, weird inaccurate mythology fanfic written by someone who doesn't know anything about the myths isn't fact.

The mythology isn't straight up history. The myths were often mistranslated (the Greek word for r*pe didn't just mean r*pe) and they aren't facts. They were also products of their culture. So. No. They are not. And their worshipers aren't r*pe apologists.

Myth 9: Titans are evil and/or Olympians hate titans

Truth: Titans are fine. Really. They're not evil, they're not going to hurt you. They're just another kind of Theoi. Many of them were actually a large part of the historic religion. Hekate's Deipnon was a monthly festival, after all. And no, Olympians don't hate titans. Remember the point about myths not being literal.

Myth 10: The gods are jealous

Truth: No, the gods will not be jealous if you worship another god. They wont be jealous if you worship another pantheon, or if you need a break. If you're a god consort, they won't be jealous if you're interested in other mortals or deities. If you're a devotee, they won't be upset if you devote to other deities.

The most jealous a god gets is upset if you break an oath, promise, or agreement with them. If you promised them a daily libation but skipped it for another deity without permission, they may get upset. But even then, that's not really jealousy.

Myth 11: If you work with X deity, you can't work with Y

Truth: This is usually based on rivalry in mythology, and isn't true at all. Related to the above jealousy point, no deity in real life hates another deity, especially not enough that if you worship both they'll be upset. You can worship Aphrodite and Persephone. You can honor Hera and Leto.

Most of these gods are actually happy if you honor other theoi. Many of them are family, or share domains.

If enough people are interested, I might make a part two, because this is barely the tip of the iceberg. RBs welcome from pagans and non-pagans alike.

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hotcoffeecoldmornings · 4 years

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(This shit is long so bear with me.)

Can’t Eat, Can’t Sleep, Reach for the Stars

I haven’t felt this way in awhile. This ‘can't eat, can't sleep, reach for the stars, over the fence, world series kind of love.’

It’s hard to describe. The last time I was all-consumed like this by a TV show and a ship, that TV show was The 100, that ship was Clexa, and my world was, quite honestly, turned upside down by it.

I used the first two seasons of The 100 as background noise as I wrote my Master’s Thesis in 2015. To be honest, I didn’t really know exactly what was happening until Bodyguard of Lies (an episode anyone reading this post probably remembers well) came on. And a passionate kiss between two world leaders left me speechless and shocked. I was blindsided by it, unaware that that kiss would be the beginning of not only finding myself, but also accepting myself, and then finding a chosen family I never knew that I needed because of it.

There’s been alot of (okay, not a lot, but more) f/f ships on TV since then. Maggie and Alex. Nicole and Waverly. Elena and Syd. Kat and Adena. Anissa and Grace. Stef and Lena. Karolina and Nico. And the list goes on… While each of these ships is equally important, and each one represents another push towards more inclusive storytelling, there was never a ship that hit me as hard as Clarke and Lexa did.

Until now.

Harold, They’re Lesbians

Gay. Witches.

Motherland: Fort Salem said the words. And I fucking came running.

Okay, so it took me a few weeks… Thank you, twitter timeline, for finally getting my ass on board. It’s not that I didn’t want to start the show. It’s that my anxiety-ridden brain had other plans for me in mid-March. Like spending the majority of my time researching a global pandemic and then crawling into a depression hole because of it… Or something like that.

But nonetheless, I’m here now. And I’m fucking staying.

I knew I’d love this show. The concept of witches peppered with the idea that sexuality is irrelevant is honestly my one and only weakness. So I went into episode one with high hopes. And I sure as hell was not disappointed.

Episode 1 gave me even more than I could’ve asked for. We meet three uniquely powerful individuals, who all come from three uniquely interesting backgrounds. Abigail Bellweather, born into a lineage of the most powerful and elite witches Fort Salem has ever seen. Tally Craven, the last one standing in her family’s long-line of service, selflessly choosing to say the oath when she didn’t technically have to. And Raelle Collar, who has an unparalleled set of powers, combining her mother’s Christo-Pagan ways with those of the seeds learned at Fort Salem.

Rounding out that already brilliant cast is Scylla Ramshorm, the ‘sexy weird’ Necro who may or may not be evil (but we love her all the same). General Sarah Alder, the original witch who signed the Salem Accord, selling out every future witch to the United States Army, and whose ego quite often gets the best of her. And Anacostia Quartermaine, the Bellweather Unit’s Drill Sergeant who has a peculiar fondness (and leniency) for Raelle Collar.

The fact that this television show is entirely female centered (like, we’re talking 60 seconds of male screen time in the pilot), is what separates this show from most. Men exist in the world of Fort Salem as characters to exclusively propel the female leads forward, which is a stark contrast to the majority of shows right now. And not only is the entire main cast female, the main lead is gay. And honestly, the sexuality of every character on the show is questionably debatable as well. Except for Abigail, who quite clearly is into any and all men, and Tally, who grew up on a Matrifocal Compound and ended up in Fort Salem as a virgin. Which, of course, no shade to her, but it did strike me as odd when Abigail immediately assumed Tally’s virgin-ness when growing up in an all-female world was brought up.

So let’s start there, shall we?

The Heteronormative Narrative (or not…)

Something I did find puzzling about Motherland: Fort Salem (and the only thing, really) is how they portray sexuality, relationships, and love. In regards to sexuality, Eliot Laurence, the creator and executive producer, has been incredibly forward in interviews with the narrative that ‘your sexual preference doesn’t matter in this world.’ Which I appreciate to the fullest, trust me. But pardon my slight hesitation when I hear that line, because I think we’ve all been burned by it once before.

Motherland: Fort Salem has done a tremendous job of this. They’ve allowed characters to own their sexuality without question. It was never a thing when Raelle started dating Scylla. At Beltane, everyone went off with whomever the dance paired them with - even if that meant the same gender, and even if that meant three or four or five of them. Sexuality, in regards to same-sex partners, is never a character arc in this show, and it’s never there to create a plot point.

HowEVER, there were a few things I noticed that confused that fact.

Like I said about Abigail in the very first episode, when the Bellweather Unit is meeting for the first time, why was Abigail so quick to question Tally’s virginity after learning she comes from a Matrifocal Compound? If there are no heteronorms in the world of Motherland: Fort Salem, then why is it assumed that losing your virginity is related to relations with a man? Even though Tally is (well… was) a virgin, why would that question be brought up? If roles were reversed and it was Raelle living on the Matrifocal Compound, the conversation would’ve gone strikingly different, and it would’ve supported this heteronormative narrative that I thought we were trying to avoid. I’m just going to blame this one line on how badly Abigail wants the D, so sleeping with a woman wouldn’t even cross her mind.

But then what about the idea of this ‘five-year marriage contract’? It’s simply about producing a child, so I assume a woman could never have that sort of thing with another woman, and that those women could never add to their lineage (unless they entered into a five-year marriage contract simply to reproduce). Doesn’t this, alone, signify a heteronormative world without even meaning to do so? While they accept LGBTQ+ relationships, how do they actually fit into the society and culture that this show has created? Wouldn’t the gay witches be seen as almost inadequate in carrying on the gene if they don’t have a child? (AmI just thinking too much into this...?)

But then again, the whole concept of ‘love’ in Fort Salem is rather insignificant itself. As Gerit mentions, no one is supposed to spend their life with just one person. Witches are committed to one another in five-year partnerships to reproduce, and then that’s it. So in a way, I understand that nobody, no matter what their sexuality is, really gets to experience this fairytale ending that we’re used to seeing in a (*cough* heterosexual) ship on TV. And in a way, I also think that’s what makes this show all the more fascinating. Eliot Laurence gave everyone a level playing field by just removing the idea of a happily ever after altogether. In Laurence’s world, witches are meant to train and fight and die for their country. Love is their weakness. But what’s so compelling about that is even though love is their weakness, he made sure that love also manifests into their greatest strength.

From what I’ve seen in interviews for Laurence, every single thing has a purpose. So I’m quick to let this go, and see where he takes us. He’s been building this world inside his head for nine years, so I know that there’s so much more to this story than what can be told in a 10-episode season.

But Back to the Lesbians

Anyway, back to love. Specifically gay love. I wish I could put into simple words my obsession with Raelle and Scylla.

From the incredible chemistry that Taylor Hickson and Amalia Holm share on-screen together to the directors and writers who’ve portrayed their love story so magically, Raelle and Scylla are truly something special. They’ve taken the place of a ship this queer fandom lost when Lexa was killed. It’s a ship that you want to hate, because every part of this story tells me to hate Scylla. She’s Spree. She’s vindictive. She’s dangerous. Yet every part of my brain tells me to love her. And to love them together.

I don’t like easy stories. I want stories that make the ending worth it. I want hardships and pain and hurt and work when it comes to love. Which is why I like the story of Raelle and Scylla. There was a spark between them in their very first scene together- a spark you could feel through the TV. It was believable and real. They come from similar backgrounds of loss and solitude, and that’s what originally bound them together. And over the next seven episodes, we watched their relationship grow. We saw their vulnerabilities, their growth, their passion. But now we’re going to see the hardship. The pain, the anger, the betrayal.

I appreciate that they’re not skimping on telling any part of their story. The two are special together, and so far, this show has proved that.

She’s Special

I want to break down Raelle Collar before bringing up anything else, because, well, obviously she’s the main character, but she’s also got a lot going on. The fact that Raelle channels her power through something other than the typical ‘seed’ is something that will be of importance to why she’s so powerful. Petra Bellweather, herself, claims that Raelle’s mom, Willa, used unconventional methods that delivered incredible results. “She was the fixer every unit wanted to deploy with.”

While all witches in Basic Training are learning about utilizing their extra set of vocal cords to create magic songs, Raelle can do it in a way that’s reminiscent of where she grew up- Chippewa Cession. In the very first episode, she makes note that her family was there before it became a Cession. Aka, before the land was given to the Chippewa tribe in exchange for their magic.

Raelle comes from a line of witches that all have more unique abilities than what’s taught at Basic Training. She uses a combination of Native American spirituality/Christo-Paganism skills during her days at Fort Salem, which brings up questions (and judgment) from other witches. It seems as though that kind of magic was the way witches used to do things before Sarah Alder released her song into the world and created a vocalizing army with it. Raelle’s peers look disgusted when they see her still using the same ways witches once did. It’s particularly noticeable when she heals people, and recites Matthew 7:7, “Ask, and it shall be given to you; seek and ye shall find; knock, and it shall be opened unto you.” The entire theme of the Book of Matthew, in regards to Christianity, is about prayer. Asking and receiving. That God will provide you with what’s needed, and nothing more. But when it comes to Paganism, it’s about the law of attraction and return in our universe. It outlines that there is no life without balance - that all prayers can be answered, but they’ll be answered with things that are taken from elsewhere. All prayers almost have a consequence. Just like all magic has a consequence.

Raelle’s power, at least what she knows of it up until now, is based on a consensual balance, bringing the theme of Paganism’s Matthew 7:7 into the type of witchcraft she practices. She can heal someone, but what she heals them from will be transferred onto her. Balance. Consequence.

Bringing General Sarah Alder back into this, this is the same type of magic that she traded for back in the 1700’s when she granted the Chippewa Tribe the entire length of the Mississippi River. In exchange, she gained the magic that could keep her eternally young. But just like the magic that Raelle does, this age defying practice has consequences too, and requires balance. Every 50-60 additional years that General Alder adds on to her endless life, a young witch must be sacrificed to take on those years, and must stand by General Alder the rest of her short-lived life.

But where does the balance go?

Adil is such a great addition to the cast because he sheds a light on something so crucially ignored on campus. All magic has balance. This is teased throughout the season, like when General Alder hits turbulence on her way to The Hague and jokes (but not really jokes), “I assume I have one of you to blame for that.” Or how Raelle soaks up her ‘patients’ illness. But it’s not truly smacked in our faces until Adil says it.

As Abigail is flaunting her ability to *one day* “grind iron into ore and mountains into dust,” Adil drops a truth bomb on her. “All that weather you fight with has a cost. Floods. Failing crops. Famine. Every war, people starve.” She’s quick to reply that the good they do far outweighs the bad. But to who? Certainly not to Adil and his people. Meeting him is going to give our recruits a serious insight into just how consequential their ‘work’ can be. He’s going to play a crucial role in realizing how manipulative and egotistical General Alder has been.

Not only is weather an issue, but plagues. “Like the one attacking my sister.” Adil and Khalida come into the storyline because Khalida is sick with a deathly black webbing wrapped around her body. When they first make it to the Military Outpost (somewhere in the dessert between Russia and China?), the Soldier who meets them at the gate yells, “they’re here.” So were they expecting them?

Raelle eventually is the one who heals Khalida, (by using her Christo-pagan means) but instead of taking up the illness like it usually does, instead, it infects the giant mushroom that Raelle touched earlier.

The balance of Mother Mushroom.

I go back and forth between theories for the giant mushroom growing under Fort Salem. But today, I’m convinced the mushroom is attached to General Alder’s vitality. And consequently, the entire vitality of Fort Salem as well. In one episode, Berryessa reminds us that all life on campus is directly connected to Alder. And if what Scylla says in My Witches, that “life becomes death, which becomes life again,” is relative to the life on campus and how General Alder parallels that, then this theme of balance throughout the series is more prominent than we realize.

The giant mushroom living under campus is clearly important. It has hands and replicates faces and takes on diseases and Izadora is not a fan of anyone touching it. So yes, you could say this fungi is a main character now.

But. Why?

“In the kingdom of plants, mushrooms occupy the underworld. Nothing ever really dies.” Mushrooms have an entire underground network of language to one another. And they are responsible for the breakdown and decomposition of death so that organic matter can become something else. Necros have an obvious connection to this ecological process too, so they must have a connection to the continuous process that General Alder goes through to support and sustain life on her campus.

I think that the “Mother Mycelium” signifies each and every consequence that Fort Salem has accumulated. It holds the hurt and death and pain and regret of everything General Alder has created. And now that the Mushroom is infected with whatever plague Khalida had, I think it’s going to wreak havoc on Fort Salem. Magic is based on balance, and I think massive consequences are coming to make up for years of disparity.

One last thing on my mushroom-thoughts, is when Helen Graves said “the dead make excellent eyes and ears.” An underground network of mushrooms all connected to recently dead organisms would certainly be a great way to gain insight too. Scylla mentions that she needs something recently dead to grow her deathcap, so does this Mushroom need to be constantly “fed” with death to continue the creation of life?

Does Alder know about that? Are the mass-murders that the Spree are doing related to this? Killing hundreds of people at a time would definitely be a good way to keep the mushroom o’ death fed. Is Alder behind the Spree!?

Sexy Weird

Speaking of Spree... Can we talk Scylla now? First of all, what the hell is this girl’s timeline? When we first meet her, she’s a cadet (second year) in War College already, meaning she would’ve had to enlist on Conscription Day the year before Raelle. Yes? In Mother Mycelium, we see that she *might* (still don’t believe it) have been the person behind that first Spree attack on Conscription Day of this year (so when Raelle, Tally, and Abigail enlisted), so was she at Basic Training for an entire year before deciding to become Spree? Did she enlist knowing that she would eventually be Spree? Does this ever get addressed in the show?

Since we’re here, I might as well say there’s no way Scylla did that. I’ll never believe it. And I’m using my one semester of Greek Mythology in college to tell you why (who knew that class would eventually come in handy)

In My Witches, when Tally, Abigail, and Glory first meet Scylla, Tally makes it clear that ‘Scylla’ is a Greek name. Okay. Greek. Cool. Mythology. Let’s go. I already knew that Eliot Laurence doesn’t waste any minute of screen time when it comes to plot development and storytelling, so my meta brain did a little digging.

In Greek Mythology, Scylla was a sea-monster who haunted the rocks of a very narrow strait, opposite of the whirlpool of Charybdis. The monster’s purpose was to lead ships and boats towards the whirlpool, which was lethal to all who attempted to pass. Scylla was used to lure boats towards Charybdis, but was never meant for actually destroying them. Scylla was a fear tactic, not a murderous monster. In poetry, it’s often said that Scylla isn’t a monster at all, just born into a monstrous family. In conclusion (from my 4 months of Freshman-level Greek Mythology and a little refreshment on Google) I think Scylla is simply being used to lure people to the Spree, but not actually doing the mass-murdering that is being shown in the episode.

What I do know is that Scylla Ramshorn is absolutely Amalia Holm. Mainly because I refuse to accept that Raelle is falling for the red head (sorry, red head). But also because at the end of the Pilot, when Scylla (in red head disguise) looked into the mirror, the balloon was her reflection, and it followed everything that she did. But in other scenes, when Scylla’s face is the normal Scylla face, she can see her own reflection. So the redhead girl is unimportant. Plus, IMDB says she never appears again this season...

We Are The Spree

As much as I hate to believe that Raelle’s mom (or Aunt!) is alive and leading the Spree, the connections between the two entities do add up. Both (Spree and Collar’s) are against the authority and power that the Witch Army has over populations of witches. They’re both against General Sarah Alder. I believe they both use spoken word magic rather than just vocalized magic. When the Spree carry out their attacks, they’re whispering words under their breath, not singing any song. Which is reminiscent of how the Collar’s do magic. Additionally, it would make sense as to why the Spree would want Scylla to bring them Raelle. And I still can’t get over the conversation between Raelle and Tally when Raelle explains her family’s combat charm. “A bowerbird’s foot. They love anything blue.”

Blue? Why. WHY.

Maybe Willa Collar was captured by the Spree? Or the Aunt was? Or the Spree needs Raelle to heal someone?

One last weird very unthought out theory goes with the other Biblical verse Raelle recites - Isaiah 43:2. “When you pass through the waters, I will be with you; and when you pass through the rivers, they will not sweep over you. When you walk through the fire, you will not be burned; the flames will not set you ablaze.” The fact that all Spree attacks have happened with something to do water- in the snow, at the pool, on a cruiseship. And the fact that the last line of that verse is literally, “you will not be burned; the flames will not set you ablaze.” This type of witchcraft has to relate to how the Spree does magic. Right??

Now I’m re-talking myself into the fact that the Collar’s might be somehow leading Spree...

But who’s ‘we’?

If the Collar’s are in charge of Spree then this next theory would actually check out.

Anacostia has been a little more over-bearing with Raelle than any of the other girls. On multiple occasions, she’s said how Raelle is gifted. In fact, they all have. Even Abigail in Hail Beltane mentions that “Raelle didn’t go outside of canon, she’s naturally gifted.” They all know she’s gifted. It would make sense if the Collar’s were the ones running Spree, and that Anacostia, aka. General Alder’s head bitch, was sent to protect Raelle from ever joining them. Alder wants to capitalize on the powers that Raelle has, and keep them in the Witch Army.

But I also think Anacostia could be playing General Alder. There have been too many times where she stares at Alder just a little bit too intently, and I can’t stop thinking that she might be in some sort of rebellious group too. Maybe a certain cell of Spree?

Because you can’t deny that Anacostia has also taken in interest in Scylla, particular to keep her away from Raelle. When Anacostia first caught them flying high on Salva, she told Scylla to stay away from Raelle, and it seemed as though she (tried) to use some sort of coercion magic while doing so. When Anacostia then saw them together at the Bellweather wedding, she almost sounded shocked, “I expressly told you to stay away from her.” Did Anacostia attempt coercion magic on Scylla and it didn’t work? And if she did, why didn’t it work?

That entire exchange felt odd yet familiar. Like the two have history. “Your name wouldn’t have been on the list. You’re not supposed to be here.” Particularly the “you’re not supposed to be here.” Did Anacostia know about the attack on the Bellweather’s? And did she think it would be threatened with Scylla there? Or did she know that Scylla was supposed to bring Raelle to the Spree at 6pm. And was sent to make sure Scylla never completed that task.

I found it interesting that Anacostia was never seen fighting off the balloons like every other Witch was when they appeared. And her being at the actual wedding felt odd too. Especially if she’s General Alder’s right-hand (wo)man, because last time I checked, Alder and Petra Bellweather weren’t on the greatest terms. In fact, none of the General’s are on great terms with Alder.

Since we’re now on Bellweather season...

Camarilla. No, not Carmilla.

There’s certainly a second threat in this show. And they were the ones behind the attack at the Bellweather’s. Not only has this already been proven by Jessica Sutton on Twitter (lols) but the clues were literally all there. They didn’t use any magic to fight. They had to use a mechanized sound machine to stop Abigail and Petra from using their powers. Then they covered themselves with gasoline and lit themselves on fire before the mother-daughter duo blew them away. It wasn’t Spree. But it was meant to look like Spree. And I think the balloons were simply a distraction, so all efforts and power would be outside fighting off the balloons while the civilian waiter’s could attack.

But who is doing this?

It’s been brought up that there are alot of humans who don’t agree with the Witch Army that Alder leads. Even the President of the United States is hesitant about them. “You, too, are bound by rule of law to the will of the American people, who have elected me to represent their interests and protect them. Don’t you forget it. Or you may find yourself reminded.” Then Tally gets confronted later in that episode by a civilian who says, “It’s witches who are committing these attacks. It’s your kind of people .” And then even later in the series, there’s talk of a “growing debate in congress to revoke the Accord and disband the army.” So you could say there are definite opinions about this Army by civilians.

In A Biddy’s Life, there’s a shot when Raelle and Scylla are in the room with weapons once used to kill witches. There’s an undeniably important shot of the Camarilla Scythe. Camarilla, itself, is defined as a small group of people acting as private advisers to a ruler or politician with a shared and nefarious purpose to carry out secret plots.

Since civilians are the ones that are most opposed to the Witch Army, it makes sense that maybe the President, herself, is the one behind these attacks. She’s trying to take down the most Elite of the Witches (the Bellweather’s), hence inhibiting the Army from being as successful as it’s been in the past. And what better way than to kill the most elite witches of child-bearing age.

While this theory checks out, I can’t help but to also think that Petra Bellweather could be behind the attacks. I know, it’s a stretch, (specifically because it’s her own family that’s being targeted) but I do love that ‘good powers, bad people’ trope. And what better way to make sure nobody questions your efforts if you’re the last one they’d suspect? Petra Bellweather has been itching to boot Alder from head witch honcho for awhile. Since killing Bellweather’s is the ultimate attack against witches, this would be a great strategy to showcase that Alder is inept in dealing with these enemies, creating a fall in power. And eventually, a rise in another. A Bellweather.

Okay, I know what you’re all probably thinking. “So you’re saying that she wanted her own daughter killed!?” Not necessarily. When you watch Bellweather Season, and specifically the wedding scenes, they put an insane emphasis on timing. And I don’t believe that that’s just because of Scylla trying to get Raelle out of there by 6pm. When you watch the sequence back, the Bellweather Unit was supposed to be having their interview with the Dean of War College, starting at 5:30ish. If the interview took a good bit, say 30-45 minutes, this would strategically put Abigail not in the line of fire (aka Charvel’s room) at 6pm when they struck.

But on the complete other hand, Abigail was supposed to be up with Charvel at that time helping her get ready. Meaning if it wasn’t Petra Bellweather, someone perfectly timed both Bellweather’s of childbearing age to conveniently be in the same place at the same time.

Then the fact that Scylla was meant to leave with Raelle at 6pm (the exact moment the waiter’s and balloons struck), can’t go unnoticed. Did they want her to leave with Raelle at 6pm because the Spree knew about the attack? Did someone warn them? Does this explain why Anacostia was shocked to see Scyalla. “You’re not supposed to be here.” Why wasn’t she supposed to be there????

I’m just going to tap out of this theory now.

But One More Thing

This might be a totally aggressive theory, and I have to credit the initial spark of this idea to my girlfriend, because during my 67th rewatch of this show, she brought up something I’d never thought of before. She asked me what Scylla’s purpose of attending the wedding was, and if the person she was supposed to bring to Penelope Road at 6pm really was Raelle?

This got thinkING. What if it was someone else???

When you look back at all the times Scylla spends talking to her balloon mirror, they never actually say Raelle’s name. Sure, we’re meant to believe that Raelle is the obvious target. But what if that’s a cover?? What if she’s using Raelle to infiltrate something else and get to someone else??

It would make sense to use Raelle to target Abigail instead- an elite Bellweather. Like I said, this is a very unlikely theory but it would definitely be a shock to literally everyone (except my girlfriend apparently)...

Has the entirety of the show been leading us down a path to distract us from something else going on!? With every other ounce of brilliance here, I wouldn’t even doubt it.

In Conclusion

I went into this show expecting to be seen and represented as a queer woman, but what I actually got was so much more. What I got from this show is the realization that me being queer doesn’t have to have anything to do with me being a woman at all. My strength, and will, and mistakes, and growth, and grace, and support, and passion, are what make me a woman. Each of our stories are deserving enough to be told just because we are women.

I’ve struggled with that fact my entire life - my womanhood.

Femininity, feminism, and female empowerment are all things I’ve only recently connected with. I was raised in the culture of traditional gender roles. My dad went to work and my mom stayed home. It’s not that I was necessarily taught that men and women must occupy those roles; it’s just that’s all I knew. To even further confuse my adolescent existentialism, not only was my mother a stay-at-home mom, she was also in the Marine Corps. And she never really understood the fact that not all women are as strong as she is.

My mom’s a badass, don’t get me wrong. She’s one of my hero’s. She came from a family who didn’t have much, and after realizing that she couldn’t afford to go to college, she enlisted instead. Six years later, she went to Penn State on a full-ride. She’s worked for every ounce of success that she’s seen, and she’s worked her ass off for it. But because of that, she struggles with the idea of feminism.

I can’t blame her too much. I understand the mindset she’s coming from. Growing up with that being instilled in my mind was hard though. Because it was expected that I, too, grow up to be a strong independent woman.

I graduated in the predominantly male industry of agriculture (I want to be a farmer, okay!?). All through college, grad school, and post-grad school, I worked on farm after farm after farm. And it was there that I was introduced to the idea of toxic masculinity. I tolerated comments that I won’t even say out loud. I’ve “accidentally” been touched in more ways than I care to count. And what I hate the most about it all, is that I fucking tolerated it. I’d laugh it off, and then I’d walk away, mortified at what I’d actually just put up with. And while by no means do I blame my upbringing and home life on this, I do blame the upbringing and home life on the female characters I saw on television. If Brooke Davis was constantly and overly sexualized in high school then I guess I was supposed to, too. Right??

Sure, I still hear comments that I wish I didn’t. But I’m also surrounded by people and characters who taught me to never put up with the shit I once did. Female characters are portraying a storyline that people take more seriously now. They’re persevering. And that jumps off the screen in Motherland: Fort Salem.

It’s taken me a while to realize how Raelle and Scylla have affected me as much as Clakre and Lexa did (two characters who literally awakened my sexuality). But I think I get it now.

I love both Raelle and Scylla. Each one. Individually. As witches. As warriors. As females. As humans. As strong female characters. So, in a way, watching this show has awakened something else in me that I’ve also been suppressing all along. My femininity. My strength. My perseverance.

Sure, Raelle and Scylla are my favorite ship right now, but it wasn’t them being together that made me fall in love with this show. Oddly enough, it was them being apart. It’s the fact that each one stands on her own as a unique and beautifully complicated story. And it’s the fact that I, too, am deserving of a beautifully complicated story.

Last Section, I Swear

Motherland: Fort Salem is a magical mix of intense story building, relatable character development, and fascinating cinematography, all while being told through a gender and sexuality normative opposite of what we’re used to seeing. It’s a show that encompasses female strength unlike anything I’ve experienced before, where men are the background noise who aid in pushing the plot forward. It’s a show that deserves another season. And another and another and another and another.

It’s a show I needed ten+ years ago, at 18 years old, freshly out of high school and wondering why the fuck I never had crushes on guys like everyone else my age did. It’s the show I needed so I didn’t always wonder why I was so obsessed with Peyton Sawyer and Summer Roberts and why I was the only one I knew who thought Torrance and Missy should’ve ended up together. It’s the show I needed to learn that my femininity doesn’t make me any less tough than my male counterparts. It’s the show I needed so I never put up with anyone’s shit. It’s the show I needed to teach me that I am storm and I am fury.

It’s the show I needed then. But it’s also the show I’m so happy that I have now.

#motherlandfortsalem #motherland fort salem #raylla #clexa #motherland fort salem theory #scylla ramshorn #scylla #raelle #raelleandscylla #raelle collar #lgbtq #this is so long i'm so sorry #abigail bellweather #tally craven

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pumpumdemsugah · 5 years

Note

Whenever I see posts from you I feel like you articulate a lot of things that bother me about tumblr discourse really well. Bc of that I was kinda wondering, do you ever feel like you’re stuck between groups on here? Like a lot of people will say you’re a terf if you believe in sex based oppression/think genital preferences aren’t bad etc but I think all of that and support trans people. I feel kinda weird abt most radfems on this site being transphobic but they’re right abt other things a lot

I don’t think you have to ‘pick’ if you genuinely don’t see your self politically anywhere and you don’t have to agree with everything someone says. No great activist or academics got where they were by only consuming things from people exactly like them or even agreeing with people they admired or agree with. Whenever i feel disillusioned from everyone it always help to go off and read feminist lit and understand where some of these misused arguments come from. I do get the stuck feeling but i say what i want anyway lol but im not really involved in discourse, just post what i think so its simpler for me

you don’t owe it to anyone not to take issue with something just because you agree with them on other things. thats not good for independent thinking and its makes its easy for cult of personalities or take hold or just bad ideas like genital preferences

The funniest thing about every single article “proving” sex doesn’t exist is as soon as you start reading it you realise the author is being extremelyyyyy selective about the “science” they’re using or they have like an English degree (rich coming from someone with an art degree like myself lol ) so they aren’t the expert they’re painting themselves to be and they’re using very poor arguments. Every argument about non-human animals being able to change sex so take that human sexual dimorphism needs to die. We’re not fish and the purpose of those arguments was to show that nature doesn’t resolve around the human body and how sex manifest in non-human animals. it was never, there’s no such thing as being female or that chromosomes are irrelevant in sex just because their role in the body is more comprehensive and complicated than, this makes you male and this make you female. Its crazy seeing how certain arguments have changed on here compared how it was in 2011 but its mostly cause its gone through a game of telephone

None of these people read shit. They find online figures that makes them feel good and powerful and copy and paste their views so they’re dependent on being told what to do so they repeat shit they havent really thought or read about so you get lesbians in long term relationships licking out pussy everyday acting like a martyr by pretending sexuality is about being inclusive so you must accept dick that they won’t . Like i can not be sexually attracted to someone’ internal sense of their gender , maybe that can be an interesting conversation but attraction ???? Plus alot of these people are un-kissed virgins so its easy for them to say genitals don’t matter

You don’t have to go along with anything that you don’t even believe or see it as an issue whatever label or feminism you decide does or doesn’t call to you. I suggest just going off and reading or even joining face to face feminist book clubs . Its less about being right and more are you helping to change things in a way that matters and are you speaking about things in a way that names the problem and isn’t just about a publish show

Testosterone Rex and Invisible woman are GREAT books to great if you need any more conviction about sex based oppression. It helps having a fact based grounding in your views especially when you feel stuck cause you can fall on that when you don’t think you belong anywhere

#anonymous #messages #Anonymous

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bedlamgames · 5 years

Text

No Haven 0.892

Main highlights for this one are the talking to options, a new character with attached assignment in the marshlands, ponygirl training, new assignments, new commissions, and more.

Download links can be found on the No Haven page. Update notes can be found under the break.

If you don’t have RAGS and you need a copy to run it there’s one on the help page here. If RAGS has never worked on your system despite the help page suggestions then it might be worth trying with one of the alternate players. There’s also improvements on there to the RAGS player that can also help with performance.

0.89

-Talking to improvements:

---See what you can find out is now based more on a reputation check rather than just a random role.

---You can now find out how they feel about the various encampment roles. What you know about them will be listed prior to the conversation. You can also find this out if you assign someone to a role that they love if a respect check is passed.

---Talking to a slaver to find out they like/love being a Spiritual Leader will generate them a random faith trait as if you'd assigned them to the role.

---Can now use hypnotic triggers during talk to so you can improve morale, lessen the effect to outright remove certain traits, and add new ones. (Will be active in the hotfix)

-Marshlands improvements:

---New text intro first time you go there.

---Bonus to find something based on the current month.

---New character to find with two pieces of patron commissioned art.

---Can unlock a new encampment assignment to let your slavers to gain a new trait out of a possible twelve.

-New commissions:

---One with variants for Dark Elf Female Slavers, Female Slaves, and Futanari Slaves. There's another variant that will be used for an assignment in a later update.

---One used for Sea Elf Male Slavers, and a zoomed in version for Quintari slaves. Will be used for an assignment in a later update.

---One with before and after variants used for one of the new assignments. Also used for now as Draenei Demi-Angel/Fallen/Succubus examines.

---Not a new one, but I've decided to use the Male Draenei portrait for the Male examine for that race as well.

-New assignments:

---Ponygirl slave training which is unlocked through sufficient Endurance Training. This has also been added as a potential request from the Fulfil Opportunities. Currently uses the Quick as You Like commission, but I'm hoping to get that replaced soonish with a specific commission. Ideally to tie it together with the one I get to replace the current Endurance Training placeholder art.

---The Arrogance storyline continues off a branching path with two connected new assignments. Include the first time where aspects are used like a trait check. Both have the potential to obtain the unique depicted in the commissioned art. First assignment is rare on the Great Plains, can be found only from the third month onwards, and includes vignettes for the successes. Second assignment is a reduced occurrence uncommon (like Green Wooden Door) in the Deep Mountains though it has to be unlocked first by having corruption and personally completing a certain assignment and obtained either of the uniques from that one.

-Basic Dominance Training now requires Advanced Obedience Training and is no longer blocked by being Obedient. Obedient slaves will not gain Dominant by completing the Dominance training, but can count the trait as a positive on assignments if they have completed Advanced Dominance Training.

-All the Neko, Elves, Fae, and Nethemir regardless of portrait chosen may now take Feminine as a negative in Full Custom. They can also take Sissy as a Super Negative (TF Edition only).

-Repicking in full custom will now also reset physical traits. Gender will also be set back to Male if Sissy was taken a Super Negative (TF Edition only).

-Switch should now be fully implemented and can be taken during Full Custom.

-Changed corruption so that you can get more aspects above what you can normally get from your level for competent slavers and above.

-New general order so you can choose how you wanting training intensity to go if you don't want to pick each time.

-Aura of Dark Prophecy has an extra bonus to his Cult Attendant on respect checks.

-You now shouldn't be able to go from Popular to Respected or from Feared to Liked on a positive result

-In full custom you can now take up to one Magic and one Elementalist traits discounted. Draki can now get the proper discount for having them both favoured.

-Malevolence now gives a massive bonus or penalty depending on who has it to respect checks. If both you and them have it then it becomes a minor bonus.

-Bed Warmer and Guard Duty preference was a straight roll before and not affected by traits like the other role preferences. Having changed this bed warmer also includes your traits like Seductive to see how they feel about the idea. While Guard duty is now more liked by your thugs, and honourable types while even more hated by unruly ones.

-Slightly lowered the rarity of assignments in the first month. Increased the rarity by the same amount from the sixth month onwards.

-Increased the expiry of Lady of Light from 14 days to 21.

-Added a new reward level for really rare combo requests in Fulfill Opportunities. Currently only used for the request of both Endurance and Bimbo Training where the slave has managed to get x5 thanks to getting a crit in Endurance and then a crit in Ponygirl Training.

-Added Nethemir as a Disaster on Mistress of Torments.

-Removed the 'unlocks further training options' mention on Advanced Lesbian Training. I do mean to add a final form for lesbians sometime, but for now it was misleading so it's gone.

-Fix for assigning slavers to spiritual leader having no chance to get Laughing Trickster or Spiritual.

-Fix for dismissing Disliked slavers being treated as if they're Liked.

-Fix for some slaves from Private Passage not having Debutante.

-Fix for gaining Incandescent being listed as Feminine on assignments from Corruption.

-Fix for a Blessing of Perversion corruption that gave Resilient and was impossible to get.

-Fix for the Sinful Enlightenment corruptions that gave the Aspects Practitioner/Arch-Practitioner, and were impossible to get.

-Fix for Third Eye and losing Sneaky from corruption not giving Fel Tainted.

-Fix for the crit on Share the Wealth wiping previous aspects.

-Fix for not being able to take Desolators with the change to Magic: Corruption in Full Custom.

-Fix for an issue with Severina.

-Fix for not correctly getting pony/neko wear from Cutprice Roses.

0.891

-Finished off the talking to improvements with Hypnotic as another option to general chat to improve morale, lessen the effect of annoying traits to the point of removing them, and even with enough triggers spent adding some new traits.

-As Hypnotic is getting some love Dominator can now potentially remove Sadist. Requires Emotional (which can also potentially be gained through Domination). Moved Reserved down so that will be removed after Sadist if they had both traits.

-New commission for Artistry in Flesh. Has a second variant that will also be used for a new race.

-New commission provided by a patron to use for Kestrae Harpy examines and a future assignment.

-Attempted fix for the occasional biomancy/corruption text issues. Replaced a ton of variables with new ones to try to solve this so please let me know if this causes any formatting issues.

-Fix for the new corruption assignment not being able to start.

-Fix for some issues caused by the use of both Sadist and Sadistic for the trait.

-Fix for fondled with slaves gaining a cock.

-Fix for an unintended jump from Popular to Respected on a positive result.

-Fix for not getting the Pretty Maid bonuses when Dominated/Obedient.

-Fix for Terrifying with Sadist being counted as having Acolyte of Pain on Fails and Disasters.

-Fix for a CT Error while caring for.

-Fix for getting a blank outcome when you know lots about a slaver.

-Fix for finding out about Seamstress preference hiding the other results.

-Fix for the witches getting jealous of the new inhabitant of the marshlands and breaking things if you find them.

-Fix for the Rare Race checks on Lady in Waiting.

-Fix for Lady in Waiting for the later fulfil opportunity parts having the slave traits being used for the suggestions.

-Fix for some incorrect point bonuses for breasts in full custom.

-Fix for a 1/10 chance of a missing space on armour generation.

-Fix for the issues with Tavern Takeover, Reign of the Witch-Queen, and Vicarage Tarts where you'd go on them, but they'd still be shown as expiring. Worked out what was going on there (turned out to be one of two possible issues) so if you see any others like that please let me know.

-Fix for the slave version of Severina not losing her magic with her virginity.

-Fix for repick issues with Sissy in full custom.

-Some text fixes.

0.892

-Wisps and Oozes without tentacles can now gain them on level up.

-You making use of with Dominator will be more likely to inflict the Dominated state on slaves. It will also not be cleared at Finish day so they'll have the state for a day like if a slaver had inflicted it.

-Fix for making use of slavers on roles not sending them back to their role.

-Fix for Private Passage generating all the time.

-Fix for the Savage Remnants scenario race setting persisting after start.

-Fix for the other Callers from Deluge of Oozes not having magic.

-Fix for dominator effects on slavers kicking in after the first use.

-Fix for some weirdness caused by the new biomancy/corruption variables.

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queenofthecommunistcannibals · 6 years

Text

@yikes-trademarked

i mean yeah, the post has nothing to do with it just comes across as a bit of a slap in the face to people who are genuinely oppressed in a modern day society. how are asexuals ‘neglected’ and ‘isolated’? so most people experience sexual attraction and you don’t, whoop de doo. nobody actually cares if you do or don’t experience sexual attraction. if you could please give me an actual, real life, not someone-calling-you-a-plant-online example of asexual discrimination then i’ll take back my words

___

@yikes-trademarked I super love how instead of apologizing you are doubling down. Okay. I'll give you examples. Here are some general prejudices that affect aro and ace people. They aren't in any real order.

•Until the DSM V asexuality was considered a mental illness. Despite the fact that now we are "allowed" to "identify" as asexual HSDD (Hypoactive sexual desire disorder) is STILL considered a disorder. So instead of trying to help a person accept themselves as asexual allosexual (nonace) doctors will try to "fix" someone if they want to. Asexuality is still seen as something to be cured. It is still a dysfunction in their eyes, they just hide their prejudice a little better.

•Asexuals have been harrassed and raped in an attempt to fix them. Asexuals and aromantics are often seen as a "challenge" to be harassed into affection.

•Mainstream Christianity discriminates against asexuals as they do other queer identities. Here is one quote from a document called "Asexuality and Christianity" produced for Asexual Awareness Week (the fact that we get "awareness" rather than "pride" ain't great either)

"While celibacy is officially considered a good stance in religion, declaring oneself disinterested in sex is often met with disapproval. Asexuals have been told that they are rejecting God's gift of sexuality, that they are just as bad as homosexuals because they are not 'normal'...or people decide to pray to God for them to be fixed or for the Almighty to send the right person for them to fall in love with."

Or from the horse's mouth "Question: What do you call a person who is asexual? Answer: Not a person. Asexual people do not exist. Sexuality is a gift from God and thus a fundamental part of our human identity. Those who repress their sexuality are not living as God created them to be: fully alive and well." This was written by two Jesuit priests David Nantais and Scott Opperman. In other religions this is also often true. I know more about Christianity personally but I know similar doctrines exist in Islam and Orthodox Judaism. Not to mention the notion that marriage is the only acceptable option in these religions (unless you are Catholic clergy) and children are a necessity. Hell, according to the conservative traditional gender roles of these religions even an otherwise gender conforming aro/ace doesn't fit (not marrying, no kids, no family, all that).

•Dehumanization from all sides. We are told to be human is to love and that love is nearly always put in romantic or sexual context. Indeed NOT being capable of or experiencing romantic or sexual love is often used as shorthand for someone being a bad person (As Dexter [from Dexter], for example, becomes more sympathetic he develops the ability to feel sexual/romantic love. Robots in fiction can be asexual and aromantic but only if you want to show them as apart from humanity. Once you want to make it clear they have a soul they have to experience some kind of romantic urge or longing. Like Data from Star Trek) An article in Psychology Today by Dr. Gordon Hodson Ph.D. (who specializes in studying dehumanization) postulates (with a study to back it up) that asexuals are the most dehumanized sexual minority.

•On the specifically romantic asexual front in many places do not consider a marriage valid until it has been consumated.

•In media in which asexuality and aromanticism are not proof of evil they are judged to be not real. Here is one of if not our first actual representation in media. In the film Nymphomaniac the SELF-PROCLAIMED asexual character turns out to be a rapist who the protagonist murders in what is supposed to be a "woo! You go girl!" moment. AT BEST this says asexuals aren't real. We're just sexually repressed misanthropes. It might also imply that asexuals are base animals who are waiting to strike. THAT IS ONE OF THE FEW TIMES THE WORD ASEXUAL IS EVEN USED IN MAINSTREAM FILM! I cannot think of a single other.

•We are erased constantly in real life and in media. Here are two examples of active erasure, Jughead Jones (canonly aro/ace in the comics and coded as such since day one) was straight-washed for Riverdale. You may say "oh maybe they didn't know" (which is bullshit) then consider example two: Sherlock Holmes. Holmes (who I adore) has long been one of the few characters that has been "allowed" to aro/aces, but when the creators of BBC's Sherlock were explicitly asked if he was aro/ace they said he absolutely wasn't.

This is part of what I am talking about. We are not allowed to exist. We are invisible.

•Asexuals and aromantics are somehow toxic in our mere existence. We make kids think it is okay to be like us and are poisoning their young minds. We hate sex and thus are against the sex positivity movement.

•"Virgin" is an insult and we are treated as constant children. Somehow we have failed to grow up and cannot be treated as adults.

•And here is what I was really talking about SOCIETY IS NOT MADE FOR US! CULTURE IS NOT CONDUSIVE TO OUR EXISTENCES! I didn't know asexuality was an option until I was about 24. And before that I, like many aro/ace people, put myself in a lot of situations and relationships to "fix" myself. To make myself normal. My first and only sexual encounter was one of the things that sent me spiralling into a serious depression. I didn't know that it was okay to not be interested and to say "no.". So I said "okay" because I thought it was what I had to do to be a normal teenager. I don't know if I ever shared that online before so congrats you got me so mad I revisited my personal trauma. From childhood we are told falling in love is the ultimate reward. As teens we are told we gotta get laaaaaid. As adults not being involved in a sexual/romantic (often indistinguishable) relationship is WEIRD and TROUBLING. I have been told by people who don't know I am asexual that asexual people are "too weird" or even "creepy." The idea that someone might not be capable of romantic love sets off people's red flags that said aromantic might be crazy.

•We are surrounded by sex and romance constantly. Constantly. It is inescapable. In your real life I want you to pay attention to romantic or sexual imagry and storylines around you. There is no break. No alternative. This is what I mean by "invisible at best."

•Also, we are denied a history. It is very hard to prove absence but often sexless figures are immediately dubbed to be gay/lesbian because of their lack of interest in "appropriate" gender. Forgetting entirely that asexuality and aromanticism are options. Then when the question is raised they maybe a figure WAS aro and/or ace we are told that we are """"stealing"""" history. There is like one person in history we are allowed: Nikola Tesla. I love him very much, but he also fits the bill as a weirdo asexual. Because anyone who was the least bit acceptable to society must be allosexual. An example in reverse, Queen Elizabeth I, Britain's most beloved monarch, who never married, never was romantically or sexually involved with anyone (aside from being assaulted as a teenager), and was in her era very famously THE VIRGIN QUEEN who used her virginity as part of her persona to great affect. She is not considered asexual or aromantic and never has been. I have seen a biographer bend over backwards to get away from that accusation including using an incident where an elderly Elizabeth flashed a dignitary to make him uncomfortable as proof that she was allo. We can't have this awesome historical figure be one of those creeps right?!

•i am not even going into the history of how "sexlessness" was historically treated, especially in women. Let me just say that "spinsterism" was considered a danger to children and young women.

•NOTICE I WENT THIS WHOLE POST WITHOUT MENTIONING ASSHOLES WHO USE THE DISK HORSE AND BAR US FROM QUEER CIRCLES EVEN THOUGH SOME STUDIES FIND ASEXUALS HAVE LOWER SELF ESTEEM THAN ANY OTHER QUEER GROUP AND WOULD REALLY BENEFIT FROM A COMMUNITY!! THIS POST IS ENTIRELY EXAMPLES OF NON ONLINE PEOPLE BECAUSE SOMEHOW YOUR CONSTANT ABUSE OR REFUSAL TO RECOGNIZE ABUSE IS A-OKAY BECAUSE IT IS PART OF "THE DEBATE" BECAUSE SOMEHOW OUR EXISTENCE IS ACCEPTABLE DEBATE!

These are just some examples. People are free to add more but I am tired. If you want links I will dig them up.

Sincerely,

Fuck you.

I apologize for the "fuck you" but the exclusionist attitude is so disheartening. It is bad for not only aros and aces but also the queer community in general. We should be in this together! Fighting for one another side by side! We should be there for each other for hardships and for celebrations. I think it is vital that exclusionists really examine what and who they are actually fighting against.

#asexuality #my posts #asexual #aromantic #lgbt+#queer

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johanna-swann · 6 years

Text

Help. Confused potentially bi here.

Hey and hello to all the bi/pan/omni non-binaries, girls and guys. I wanted to ask how you realized you were attracted to more than one gender?

I'm 21 year old girl/woman and am very much questioning my sexuality. This is very difficult for me, because I have absolutely no experience. I have never in my life had a boyfriend or girlfriend, I never kissed anyone or even went on a date. So I can't say "I tried this and it was great" or "I kissed a girl once, but nah, not my thing". I'm the ultimate virgin, so to say.

I think I had a crush on a guy from our orchestra once. I was 13, he was a year older and a drummer, that's all I knew about him. But I never acted on it and being my usal, self-doubting self, I always thought: "You probably don't really like him. You're a young teenage girl, he's a popular boy. You're just feeling what society expects you to feel." I was also very secretive about this "crush". My friends and I were the nerds of our class. We watched Harry Potter movies together and talked about biology lessons, boys were never ever a topic for us. We were focused on school and orchestra and swimming. I didn't have any friends outside that group, so this maybe-or-maybe-not-crush came and went without me ever talking or doing anything about it.

What happened next is a bit of dramatic teenager feelings. I was struggling with depression for a long time. I dropped out of orchestra and swimming and even school, eventually. I was so scared to disappoint people for no reason. Like, I would forget to do German homework. And I got myself so worked up over it! I deadass COULDN'T get myself to go to school, because I had forgot homework and my brain was reacting as if it was the end of everything. One day missing school turned into weeks and months and I was too scared to tell my parents, so I hid in the local library during the time I was supposed to be in school. Long story short (I am now realizing how long this post will turn out to be), I lived rather isolated from other people my age the following 5 years.

I also questioned myself about my depression. There was no rational explanation. I was a good student before it started. My family was always supportive. My friends too. I had everything I physically needed. I thought I didn't deserve help, I didn't even think I was allowed to feel the pain. Pain about what exactly?

By now, I have more or less left mental illness behind. It took a lot of time, but I sort of respect myself now? I'm back in school (graduating 5 years "too late" is weird, but I've accepted myself a little more). My family is still very supportive, I'm still in touch with my "nerd friends" (totally not my achievement, I had ignored all their messages over several weeks at times, but they are so awesome and loyal, I have no words). But I have also found a new bff. We met when I tried switching schools to overcome my depression. That didn't work out, but I'm so happy I tried. And thank the gods for that blasted Sherlock Holmes book. I had borrowed it from her and when I dropped out of school again, it was still at my house. And my weird little brain who thought it was perfectly fine to lie to my parents, leave school and ignore my friends said: "This isn't your book. It's L's book. Books are important. Books are portable treasures. You can't keep this." (Morals. Pffft. So weird.) I messaged her and wrote something along the lines of: "Hey, listen. I know you might be a little irritated about me just leaving school without saying good bye. But that book of yours. Well. I still have it and maybe I could, you know, drop by and give it back?" I don't remember how, but from that moment on, L was my best friend.

How is all of this relevant to my sexual orientation? Good question, good question. As I already said, I had a lot going on during that time and I simply couldn't have cared less about romantic relationships. I believe in the concept of love and falling in love, but I just haven't fallen for anyone yet. I also never felt sexual attraction as in "damn, I wanna kiss him/her/them right now", but when I read sex scenes or see them on tv, I kind of feel like I want that too, some day? (Tbh, I'm a sucker for smut fics sometimes. Like reading 24 smutty oneshots in a row. I do that sometimes.)

So I don't think I'm ace or aro. Also very sure about my identity, btw. I love being a girl. Dresses, red lipstick, hell yeah. #girlpower. But due to me missing out on so much during those said 5 years and I think even before, I felt... different. Like I didn't belong. Now that of course could be caused by my parents' divorce, my mum's second divorce or the many times we moved around in my childhood. But the point is that I always felt amiss and when my bff L came out to me as lesbian I thought: Maybe that's it. Maybe I feel so weird all the time because of this. I might be lgbtq+.

The last two years or something like that I started to notice how beautiful women are. Not sexy or hot, but I see a girl and think "wow, she's so beautiful". I mean, I know when someone is hot, I'm not blind. And I had this weird obsession with actress Katie McGrath for example, but why? Was it her role (Morgana) that I just felt so connected with? Was it her beauty? I rarely can ever imagine myself kissing anyone, man or woman. Not because I wouldn't like it, I think I would. But I can't really connect this wish to be loved, to be kissed, to have a special someone to a specific person and all of this leaves me so confused.

I again find myself second guessing. Am I bisexual? Or do I just admire strong beautiful women because I wanna be like them? Do I want an explanation for my I-don't-belong feelings so badly that I just cling to this idea of me finding happiness amongst the lgbtq+ community? I have no idea. Does anyone else have any ideas? Advice? Because if you do, please. I'ld love to hear it.

#panseuxal #bisexual #omnisexual #lgbtq #lgbtq community #lgbtq+#help #confused #identity crisis #disaster bi?#ugh #why is this so complicated

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sweet-xoxo-thatcares · 3 years

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In Jay's World (Aka now Jaiden's World):

I wasn't allowed to talk back to her and Ayunna.

Ayunna was allowed to kick me out or tell them to abandon me whenever they both felt like my emotions were too much for them to handle.

I wasn't allowed to talk or tell anyone about Jay and Ayunna using me for fun and/or bdsm sex.

I wasn't allowed to ask why Jay would stay fully clothed when they would interact in sex with me, but not Ayunna.

I wasn't allowed to stand up for myself.

I wasn't allowed to say no to bdsm or ask for aftercare.

I wasn't allowed to have feelings for any of them and act on it.

I wasn't allowed to talk about how angry I felt or depressed I was getting.

I wasn't allowed to be my sensitive self.

I wasn't allowed to ask questions to get to know them better or to find out what their long term goals/short term intentions were with me.

I was never allowed to say anything bad about Jay and Ayunna as sex partners, friends, their relationship, or their beliefs, ideologies about love and hate. While they acted as if they were allowed to say whatever about me.

I wasn't allowed to ask for a cgl relationship that didn't involve as much bdsm sex because Jay didn't want to take care of me or be responsible as a caregiver. They only wanted the sadistic dom role, and me being the innocent, obedient sub who wasn't allowed to question their master.

I was never allowed to ask about Jay's family or their dark past.

I was never allowed to say I don't like bdsm for what is stands on.

I wasn't allowed to cook for them (which I thought was weird...)

I wasn't allowed to talk to other guys/girls in front of Jay and/or talk about other people Im dating/talking to on the apps or Jay/Ayunna would get jealous. Jay even took my phone once and started texting one guy as me.

I wasn't ever allowed to make Jay wait for me, but Jay didn't care about making me wait or leaving me on read, ignoring me or being rude directly if they did not want to talk to me for whatever reason.

Jay didn't want me to text them at work cause they were too busy or even after work if they were too tired, but Jay would text me or call me in the middle of the night if Ayunna fell asleep and they had insomnia and wanted to cuddle her right after.

I wasn't allowed to leave them when they didn't want me to or they would guilt trip me and then be resentful...sometimes disrespectful.

I was allowed to date other people, but I would still get guilt tripped for being at my boyfriend's house for not paying as much attention to them (still being involved with them, but not together or having sex)

Summary: I was only allowed to be an available, sexless, obedient child, side chick, a friend, offered only breadcrumbs of what ever they wanted to give me, sometimes wayyyy less than what I needed. I gave them what they wanted from me, but anything I needed or was bare minimum of respect of time, care, and loyalty, and asking someone to take responsibility for their side it what made pull the gun. I had had enough being tricked, pulled, fooled, and told what to do.

I was supposed to get up and leave when they told me to, especially if it was just because Jay or Ayunna wanted to have sex. Even though they were the ones who invited me over. So, I would just have to go home early if they were both horny.

Jay even kicked me out of the 2nd passenger seat upfront once when I came with Ayunna to pick Jay up. They just told me to get out and grabbed me on the shoulder. I got tired of being treated like a child just because they were annoyed and grumpy after work. They were so rude to me even more after they started that factory job. And I didn't do anything to them or say anything mean to them.

I didn't deserve to pushed aside like that, then you wanna be nice when you wanted me to come by, be your friend (consistently playing the friend button on/off) because you felt alone or then cutting the fwb button back on because you wanted some pussy????

We were no longer friends after that. They showed no respect and even seem to have gotten tired of me, by looking for other girls to have sex with while both in front of me and Ayunna.

Jay stopped caring. And Thats why I stopped trusting them with my emotions and telling them things about me.

I just packed my shit up and left. Because all that talk about them liking me, or even imagining us getting married was all bullshit just to keep me interested in them. They wanted their cake and to eat it too. Jay wanted a 4th, in the bedroom.

Jay wanted an orgy with me, Ayunna, and some other stranger...I have no idea why or were...but that was the 1st time I ever truly saw Jay as depressed, greedy, and not giving a fuck now about what they or who they wanted to have sex with.

To them it was, the more, the merrier, because Jay was unhappy and loosely changing into someone or wanting something even more.

And by golly, I didn't find out what that was until months after this year.

Jay wanted change their relationship to date/sleep with other ppl separately without Ayunna all the time and they wanted to transition into being a man.

And never knew he was gonna do that, cause no one ever told me. I wonder when did they know they wanted to start taking testosterone, but Jay said I wasn't allowed to ask about stuff like that before, because Ayunna would have considered that emotional cheating at the time. That and stuff like telling me if they felt like they were feeling suicidal. Jay wasn't even allowed to say stuff like that to me either, cause Ayunna didn't want us to get that close.

Thats how I knew these people weren't really my friends.

Real Friends can tell you anything and actually want you to get to know more about them. Not put you down for asking or wanting to know more about who they truly are.

Jay always made it seem like they couldn't trust me and same to Ayunna. The emotional resistance to get along, the lack of reciprocations to share, the cutting me off when asked "Jay, where are you from?"

Jay even said "you're supposed to ask for consent to get to know somebody."

And I was so shocked and disgusted that they even said that to me.

Because I thought we were friends? I'm not allowed to ask about who you are or what you want to do in life?

That's gaslighting and its manipulating me to make me feel bad about wanting to know more about the person who I gave my virginity to and had sex with.

I was shocked that we never did get to talk about our home states with each other vs when I talk to my one real friend she's not afraid to let me ask her anything and is ok with sharing all her secrets with me.

It just shows me now, that Im glad I never got to hold your hand. You pushed me away even for just asking for a hug. Told me to go away before. You were always at a distance from me and I got so angry, so ready to fight Ayunna because I used to be so available for you to tell me anything, but once you guys moved in, it was like you cut me off, out of your circle, out of your life.

You didn't need me to listen to you anymore. You didn't want me to know you started changing and sneaking around with other girls behind me and Ayunna's backs too.

I knew you were talking to somebody else....and you became something you didn't want me to see.

So yea, I have no idea who you are anymore.

Jaiden, is basically a stranger to me.

Like you completely tied off your female body connected to me and cut it off.

The real question is; What made you reject Jay? After all these years?

I heard you talking to Ayunna about changing your name to Jaiden in the car after you thought I fell asleep on the way back from the mall. But you never once not talked to me about it, nor did you say anything about Jaiden being your transitional identity.

Because Jayden (totally different spelling) was the 10 yr little personality (which I think is really a dissociative identity alter) that was made by their true self to protect them from remembering Jay's rape. Because that's what the alter told me when you were black out drunk that one night you had too much Captain Morgan.

So who is the new you? Jayden, the 10 year old or are you just changing your name to Jaiden to be closer to Ayunna as a male partner, now that she came out as a they too, non-binary.

Im so confused because I don't even know the signs of somebody questioning their gender if they have always seemed so naturally femme in their personality, but then again she did always try to match with Jay when they wore matching black, butchy shirts.

So yea, maybe she was inspired by Jay's image as a them, not a she.

I still don't know if that means this whole entire time, Jay was also interested in men, trans women, and even other trans men. I always assumed because they kept bringing up girls that Jay was into girls and lesbians...not all of the above like being pansexual...

But I guess they are, but of course now I feel slighted as to why they kept forcing me to stop wanting to ask questions about what they like and who they are.

I probably would have figured it out and they probably would have assumed I would have been upset had they told me about their true personality, their true gender, and their true homosexuality for men.

Jaiden didn't trust me to know, hence them blocking me back on instagram in April, after I had already blocked them.

They never wanted to come back, change my mind, and to see them switch to being somebody else.

I'm glad they're not my soulmate. That was whole lot to hide and consistently hide behind without telling me all of the whole truth.

After what I said to Jay, they'll never talk to me again or give me closure as to why they changed so drastically and never told me when, why, or how.

I'm pretty sure if someone threatens to call the cops on you for harassing them through text, then yes, they don't want me to say happy birthday or anything like that for the rest of our separate lives.

Jay would rather I just be gone, not ever knowing who Jaiden is and who was the other one about Jayden.

I'm glad I stopped trying to get into contact and just started focusing on me growing, and getting myself better, getting a nice car, and moving out of state, hopefully by next year.

I wanna go back home to Florida, but I wanna see New York or New Jersey, and even visit my great uncle in Seattle.

He ran away to Seattle from Grand Rapids after a girl broke his heart too.

And thats the end of me and Jay. No more ghost stories.

I'll sleep better in my bed tonight after confessing my sins to the internet lol.

But that also brings me up to say, Jay did get excited when I had thought to buy men's performance pills from cvs, thinking it would make us horny and our clits get hard....and Jay did start wearing a packer(fake dick to give them a bulge) and got really excited for us to pay attention to the bulge in their pants, even though I didn't really care for it at 1st and thought it just came out of the blue.

And also I knew the clothes wearing was from dysphoria, but never did I see Jay say no to wearing clothes with Ayunna during sex until the last time I let Jay penetrate me with a strap-on. I thought they would've at least kept their binder on and took off their shorts, but nope they didn't wanna do that either. Just all black shorts and a black shirt and had us ride their strap. It was weird....idk.

I was always feeling rejected so I guess I left at a good time from when I couldn't take it no more. Jay transitioning to a man and then wanting to have sex with other men or trans men/women would have hurt me had I still stayed to be in contact with them as friends after I said lets stop having sex with each other.

Everything happens for a reason. Just Thank God Im out of juice for them lmao XD (no more love for them).

Cause I never knew the real them, Jay only showed me parts of them that they wanted me to see. When you fall in love with a mask, the love isn't real. And Jay was never real with me, even when they kissed me.

What a phony. I'm glad I didn't stay to move in with them. Ayunna only offered that once I said let's stop having sex. It wasn't a real move in offer, it was another fake promise to keep me there. Ayunna did it again, "we were thinking about" and "if you planned on staying" in reference to all 3 of us being a throuple because I wanted commitment, not this petty sex pet shit. She was so annoying when I figured out it was just a gamble bluff to lead me on and keep bending my ass over for her to enjoy the view of my body.

Traitors and Penetrators. The only time I ever broke Jay's mask was when they called me while they were drunk (and their rule for me was to never call/text them high or drunk) and called me an asshole for showing Ayunna my tinder messages, even though she already said she had no feelings for me whatsoever, so how am I the asshole?? I said "Jay you're so delusional" cause it's not fair. Yall get mad at me for talking to other ppl, and then wanna say we don't want commitment with you, but then Ayunna still is tryna lead me on about it, like it's something to move forward to. Jay hung up on me, cause I smelled bullshit and Jay didn't like that. Even stopped texting for a few days cause they got so scared that I didn't submit and say sorry, even though they called me the asshole?

Then nobody texted me on my birthday in November but decided to come back all the way in January, when I left in October. Talking about "Did you send these long ass texts?" Not even a hello, just had to be rude all over again 3mths later. Yea, I blocked them right after that petty, little insta message. I sent them a goodbye text tryna be as nice as I could, but then they sent that and it pissed me off even more than I already was. I looked at that text like Anakin with the red lava glowing eyes, ready to kill. I saw Nothing but lava as I cried in fury, ready to just Laserbeam Jay's face off, cause how could you? And you think this shit wasn't hard for me? There's no point in going back.

Jaiden and Ayunna, don't get me at all. They'll never understand cause they weren't the ones being held accountable to follow all these damn rules, deal with inconsiderate assholes and attitude that I didn't deserve. I deserved so much better than what these two greasy pigs offered me. I've never been upset and so disappointed with the lack of care, the teasing, the disrespect for my mental health, my body, my heart, and my mind. When I said I have to leave because this relationship is making me depressed and I'm tired of dealing with jealousy on both sides. Jay said "You got problems 👋" like they didn't even care 😒 wtff

And Ayunna guilt tripped me, "Should have never trusted you and you always do this." Even though they're the ones who have left me 3-5 times and I wasn't supposed to say jack or argue when they came back.

The thing was, my ass wasn't coming back. I was gone for good 👍 And these were your last words to me? After everything we've been through? Yup, I'm out. Bye 👋

They really thought I didn't matter and that I was gonna change my mind again and come back. No. Yall really made me sick and they were trashy ass friends who never gave a fuck about my mental health. Even Jay's "alr" like I don't wanna know....when I was telling then how it made me feel suicidal the way they cut me off last time in March 2020 just because of that argument with Ayunna and they got mad that I said she's an ice queen and I didn't do what they said, tryna make me apologize and get back on good terms with her. Like no, fuck her. She disrespected me and now you expect me to kiss her ass, just so we can still be friends? She told you to block me anyway.

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ariadnedionysia · 7 years

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fandom meme : hit me up !

I was tagged by @flintvane and am genuinely embarrassed that i didn’t see this before now omg i’m so sorry babe

I’m tagging @sherlock-and-other-things , @girlwhowasntthere , @deinonychus-1 , @frodobagginsess , and @sherlokiofpigfarts ! and anyone else who would like to do this meme!!

putting it under the read more bc it’s hilariously long sO

1. YOUR CURRENT OTP(S)/OT3(S)/OTX(S)

oh gosh i have a bunch so i’m going to try and limit myself but pythacarus ( always ), gwen / leon and gwaine / percival from merlin, foggy / matt from daredevil ( i don’t watch daredevil anymore but i just watched the defenders so they’re on my mind ), jane / michael from jane the virgin, tom / sybil from downton abbey will always be a fave, dean / seamus, lavender / parvati, harry / ginny, and remus / sirius from the harry potter series, and then caleb / ben and robert / abe from TURN are my final two

2. A PAIRING YOU INITIALLY DIDN’T CONSIDER BUT SOMEONE CHANGED YOUR MIND (BONUS POINTS: WHO WAS THAT PERSON).

i’d never considered korinna / heptarian until @girlwhowasntthere mentioned them and now i actually really love the ship i’d never thought about it before

3. A PAIRING YOU USED TO LOVE, BUT IT ALL FELL APART FOR YOU.

oh god. um. you know i used to watch reign and i was a really big fan of mary and francis, whom i still love don’t get me wrong, but they took mary on a really uncomfortable plotline for me in i think the second season that was unnecessary and clearly purely for //drama// and i just couldn’t quite get over them doing that and what it did to the ship it just made me uncomfortable with them and with watching the show altogether

4. HAVE YOU ADDED ANYTHING CRACKY/HILARIOUS TO YOUR FANDOM, IF SO, WHAT.

i don’t know if this counts but i did the emily watches atlantis series? i don’t know if that counts but i think they’re funny so i’m putting it on the list?

5. WHAT’S THE LONGEST YOU’VE EVER BEEN IN A FANDOM

harry potter. i’m super proud to be a part of that fandom and i’ve been in it since the first book came out so that’s definitely the fandom i’ve been in the longest.

6. DO YOU REMEMBER YOUR FIRST OTP, IF SO WHO WAS IN IT.

i’m trying to think and it might’ve been richard / kahlan from legend of the seeker ( the show, not the books, i never actually read the books oops ), though i’m not sure.

7. NAME A FANDOM YOU DIDN’T CARE/THINK ABOUT UNTIL YOU SAW IT ALL OVER TUMBLR.

copying @flintvane ‘s answer and saying black sails !

8. SAY SOMETHING GENUINELY NICE ABOUT A CHARACTER WHO ISN’T ONE OF YOUR FAVES (CHARS YOU’RE NEUTRAL ON ARE FAIR GAME, AS ARE CHARS YOU DISLIKE)

oh god. there are a bunch i have things to say about and i can’t decide bUT i’m gonna go with petra from jane the virgin. i used to really hate her at the beginning of the series, i thought she was horrible and i just couldn’t stand her, but as the series has continued she’s really become this amazing and realistically flawed woman that i just want to see happy. i wouldn’t say she’s my fave, but i do want to see her happy.

9. NAME THREE THINGS YOU WISH YOU SAW MORE OR IN YOUR MAIN FANDOM (OR A FANDOM OF CHOICE)

i’m gonna say atlantis for this one sO

1. another season. i mean come on, guys. come on.

2. more pythacarus, we just got the one kiss ( which was amazing a+++ ) but that was pretty much it, i know they’re not the main focus of the show, but i do love them dearly and would’ve loved to have seen more

3. where the hell are the rest of the argonauts and why did jason not go back for them i need that reunion like. two years ago. pls.

10. CHOOSE A SONG AT RANDOM, WHICH SHIP OR CHARACTER DOES IT REMIND YOU OF

i just put my itunes on shuffle and “oceans” by seafret was the first song to come on, and it reminds me of ariadne / jason

11. A PAIRING YOU SHIP THAT YOU DON’T THINK ANYONE ELSE SHIPS

gwen / leon from merlin. i know merthur is the Big Ship of merlin, i don’t really see many other ships there except that one. but i think a lot about gwen being pretty much abandoned by everyone she loves / loved after arthur dies, since gwaine and arthur and elyan and morgana are all dead and merlin just decided to peace tf out, but the last shot we have of her is with leon and her being a queen on her own and bringing peace to albion, etc etc, and i just think. i mean. they said they were childhood friends somewhere back in i think season two, and they were really the two people besides gaius that knew arthur the longest, and i just think that after arthur died, they would’ve been each other’s main supports, and eventually, they could’ve ended up together. this is unnecessarily long but i just have a lot of feelings about them okay and i don’t know anyone else that ships them so they’re my ship for this wOO

12. YOUR MOST SCANDALOUS HEADCANON FOR YOUR CURRENT OTP(S)/OT3(S)/OTX(S)

i don’t think i really have any scandalous headcanons?? i’m very boring with my ships haha sorry, all my headcanons are angst or fluff

13. DO YOU HAVE ANY HARD AND FAST HEADCANONS THAT YOU WILL DIE DEFENDING, ABOUT ANYTHING AT ALL (GENDER IDENTITY, SEXUAL OR ROMANTIC ORIENTATION, EXTENDED FAMILY, SEXUAL PREFERENCES LIKE TOP/BOTTOM/SWITCH, RELATIONSHIP WITH POETRY, SERIOUSLY ANYTHING)

pretty much any poc harry potter hcs i will defend to the death, bisexual remus lupin, myka and hg wells in warehouse 13 dated at some point, bisexual harry potter, remus / tonks was unnecessary. i liked them and everything, but i didn’t really see the point of downgrading such an amazing woman like tonks to the Love Interest. she deserved better. even remus lupin knew that. danny in the defenders needs to say “i’m the immortal iron fist” less pls and thank. putting caleb and ben ( show: TURN ) with women ( that we never actually got to see ) at the end of the show was weird. bisexual musketeers. there aren’t enough lesbians in any shows m/m ships are easier to ship since there actually are some, but f/f ships are too rare and that’s a Problem. more women friendships, i’m super tired of the women being nasty to each other bc they like the same guy or whatever. peter pettigrew had a snape/lily -esque love for sirius, which is why he turned in the potters, so sirius would think remus was the secret keeper and have no one to turn to except peter. james potter grew up and evolved, pls don’t compare him to snape. neville longbottom is pure and must be protected. luna’s family can just be whimsical!! you don’t need a Dark and Edgy reason behind it, they can just be wonky and happy and weird!! every single nickname in the harry potter series is fckin hiLARIOUS. ginny weasley deserved better than she got in the movies, they did her a massive injustice.

14. 5 FAVORITE CHARACTERS FROM 5 DIFFERENT FANDOMS

1. ariadne ( i adore pythagoras but i’m gonna go with ariadne bc reasons ), atlantis

2. constance, the musketeers

3. cosima, orphan black

4. ginny, harry potter series ( /quietly pushes movie!ginny into a corner book!ginny for life )

5. ben talmidge, TURN

15. 3 OTPS FROM 3 DIFFERENT FANDOMS

i’m gonna put ones that i didn’t put in the first question :

1. nomi / amanita ( sense8 )

2. korinna / ariadne ( atlantis )

3. luna / ginny ( harry potter series )

16. 5 FAVORITE SHIPS

THESE ARE SUCH HARD QUESTIONS OH MY GOD i’m going to try and put ones i haven’t mentioned before all of my ships that i’ve mentioned are favorites though okay

1. captain james / molly ( our girl )

2. fleur / tonks ( harry potter )

3. hernando / lito ( sense8 )

4. athelstan / ragnar ( vikings )

5. sirius / peter ( harry potter )

17. JUST RAMBLE ABOUT SOMETHING FAN-RELATED, GO GO GO (PROMPTS OPTIONAL BUT ENCOURAGED)

i came late into the atlantis fandom, so i didn’t get much of a chance to be there before the series was over, but i remember seeing it all over my dash before season two came out, it was like the day before the second season started, and i was like. i gotta check this series out. so i watched the first episode of the first season, and proceeded to marathon the entire first season so i could start the second season with you lovely people in the atlantis fandom, and honestly, i’ve never been part of a better, happier, drama-free fandom. i love it so much and i love all of you so much and this is slightly cheesy but i just think everyone in the fandom is amazing.

other things. um. okay well this is sort of fan-related, but i’ve met the most amazing group of people through my group, @orderfromchaos-rp. it’s such a talented and fantastic group of incredible writers, and i just love all of them to pieces, i’ve never had such an amazing rp experience.

i’m hardcore worried about johnny depp and jude law playing against each other in fbawtft. i’m not a fan of jude law for this role and i actively, adamantly hate johnny depp, so i’m honestly worried that’s going to ruin that ship for me.

i’m super excited about being a part of all the fandoms i’m in, honestly, i don’t totally know what to do for this part of this meme so i’m just ranting but i’m seriously hoping i can be in a fandom that doesn’t have its show cancelled soon after i enter it, because being longterm fandom buddies with new material sounds amazing and i would love to be a part of something like that again, i’m not really active in many fandoms rn and i wanna change that, so hmu with any suggestions for things i should watch!!!!

#emily answers stuff #fandom memes #this was so hard but so amazing to do!!!#flintvane #emily yells about stuff

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horrible-monstrosity · 6 years

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post from like five weeks ago that i just got around to finishing now woot

oh man, I thought I had run out of salt to mine aside from heromaca, but just look at this fucking shit it's fuckig beautiful--

wait no actual first off, I want to complain about the fucking otter motif- we get it Ukuhara you made two pseudo-successful series with animal motifs, now you're being self-referential. fucking stop. There's nothing to the otter motif that can possibly actually add anything to the show- "uhh sometimes they hold hands ???" doesn't work because it's nowhere near the desperate clinginess implied in the trailers, and if that's how it's supposed to be it's an incredibly shallow motif, and it can't be the gay man thing because that's about hairy guys, not anime twinks. But becusae Penguindrum had a penguins and Yuribears had a bears and becueas meaningless callbacks are meaningful to retarded people, we have to have something so working backwards it's otters. My conficence in this production is though the roof

first off, there's the weird wait for it DOUBLE STANDARD with how people describe what they expect from this show versus how they describe Utena et al- with Utena it's about the porblems stemming from the magic evil society monster from forever ago, the good old patterwacky, how we're not saying the mens are responsible for all evil but we're saying hurr mens, how we're not saying women are the only victims that matter but every mention of male victims goes into some bizarre circular language avoiding ever actually assigning agency to any sort of a human cause while every mention of le female victims goe striaght to belbllbelbleblelbblbllbr but with these male characters it's suddenly, oh, it's about the expectations placed on men (reasonable enough), expectations to live up to muh toxic masculinity (no)... sentence ends. The expectations don't come from somewhere, they just... sentence ends. Not even society half the time. Because men can't be the victims of anything let alone a social anything, I guess. Definitely not from women. and of course there's some fucknaut beating off about "HRUUUUU BE AGNAISNTNT DUBE BRO CUTLURE ???" because why the fuck would a japanese director who writes deap n meeningful tresh care about your fucking misandric american derangement complex you fat unwed dangerhair rre-- Especially amazing how this *subtle/subconcious sort of leftist cancer is coming out of 4chan, but I guess you really can't expect people to be very reverse woke outside of, like, /pol/ (where they may be just a little bit too woke). fuck idk Reminds me of like 7-8 mins into this video where some shlubnut declares proposal expectations or some shit sexist... but does not say against whom. Because then they'd have to admit it's possible for things to be sexist against men, or a bad time for men because of their gender, and possibly because of the actions and expectations of a woman. Can't have that. So it's either sexist against women or it's just sexist against the air and nothing, I guess.

There's something about Iku being a communist edgelord and in some kind of commie cult, and about Penguindrum being a refutation of that... uh, somehow. I guess because it had something to do with a cult? Somehow?

There's something about Ikuhara and Hideaki Anno going on a gay spa trip, I don't fucking know- but interestingly, one anon's interpretation of the preview materials sounds entirely like the "hedgehog's dilemma" shit from Eva. And they did both work on that new Godzilla thing. Hmmmmm

And of course there's the convergence shit like "if it deals with The Stereotypes then it is a feminism even if it has ideological components that have nothing to do with anything feminism ever does or addresses". Can't have anything outside of the thing, obviously using the show's existence as validation for their own twisted and retarded viewpoints and so having to insist that is conforms entirely to said viewpoints while simultaneously not having the more odious elements of said viewpoints because we totally don't hate teh mens guys, we just like an anime that's about ~~sticking it to the virgin-whore complex~~ that totally exists while sucking off the male knight-beast complex most of the damn time except the knights are evil too and the one guy who's actually nice is a spineless wimp who's sexually assaulted by his sister all the damn time and should totally be happy about it FUC (srsly, there's an Utena fan site or forum thread or something I found once that talks about the virgin-whore thing in Utena with googly eyes and gooey lips but then suddenly mentions the show flipping it onto males and just... says it's "interesting" and leaves it at that... some fucking shit like that meh)

oh yeah, there's this guy

For a long damn while I've thought to myself that Ikuhara's works, while touted as feminist and certainly dealing with those feminist sorts of issues, aren't quite... so. They're certainly some kind of gynocentric, but with just a little bit more... sympathy for the male characters, responsibility placed on the females, and generally some sort of actual nuance. Maybe. Just a bit. Certainly more than basically every breakdown I've ever seen of his works has put forth up until this mofo. I guess the best thing I can say is his works seem to exist in some kind of limbo between the two... Utena seems like it's deconstructing the idea that the "roles" are some unique oppression to women or even fucking matter, including a backstory for Akio where his role as prince breaks him so badly (thanks to greedy peasants who, if I remember, are a mixed-gender crowd... where do they lie in the prince-princess-witch equation?) he basically fucking invents an evil role for himself where none apparently existed before. But then it ends like it was... not doing that, or something. In Yurikuma, I mostly saw people say shit like "this is what society makes lesbians do by being so mean to them!!" (lol remember when lesbeans got stoned and thrown off of roofs lollololol so oppress clearly the victims of anything etc etc), but there is just... no fucking society in that show outside of the cannibalistic sex offender bear lesbians and the Higurashi-tier paranoia-cult schoolgirl lesbians. The latter victimize themselves by coming up with ridiculous social mores to defend against the threat of the bears in their midst (entirely reasonable, but they sure found the most retarded possible way of doing it), while the former are cannibalistic sex offenders. NO ONE WAS THERE TO MAKE THEM THIS WAY. Hell, with the humans being called "yuri" and the bears being... well, bears, which is a gay guy thing, and the plot being about segregating two compatible but different halves of society where the more violent half can go "undercover" and "pass" within the less violent half in order to hunt them... it comes off more like the females are trying to political feminist themselves and build a wall to keep the males out. Which comes with the implication that men are cannibalistic sex offenders, but since the grils are being characterized to an absurd height of feminine toxicity as well and the show is about both sides learning to cool their tits it kind of works. Kind of. fuck idk The entire plotline with the teacher who let herself be waited on hand and foot by some guy (nice fucking meaningless reuse of the coffin motif from Utena, by the way- shit like this is why even if this was the most reverse woke anime ever it would still just be shit) and then when he simply got bored of her and politely moved on she lost her shit and immediately killed him, then remained bitter about it for the rest of her life and went on to assault teenage girls... that has got to be taking the piss. It's just gotta. If not Iku has his head up his ass to heights previously unimagined.

and then there's those converging lefttards in that thread going "he is wrong with his subjective interpretations of a vague show though!! he is wrong!!! reeeee" Uhhhh, there's like a bazillion types of feministsms so the show can't possibly be about critiquing it!! It can't just, like, pick a type, or pick out some commonalities (there sure are plenty for something so supposedly nebulous), and mull over that, it's unposstible!!

Finally I find this interesting... while his previous works had some kind of strange innocence about them despite the sexual shit, the first male-centric work he does outright has "lust is life!" as a tagline and the word "desire" worked into the title. I'm... not even implying anything with this, I just find it really kind of interesting. The title itself actually inspires more confidence than his last two works- the "zanmai" could mean "lust" or "desire" and is likely referring to the same thing as said tagline, and the "sara" could mean "dish" (as in "this place's signature dish", not a literal plate or something); lusting after food is often metaphorically used to mean lusting after someone sexually (gobble someone's cock, etc), so already it looks like there's something vaguely resembling a coherent symbolic framework rather than the random-words-based titles and plots of Yuribears and Penguindrum.

Honestly however this show turns out it's going to be a fucking disgusting beautiful delicious shitshow and I cannot fucking wait.

#anime bitching #deep thunks

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