#God help me!

[catkin-morgs-kookaburralover]

thinkin about how I can't accept that I have severe depression or anxiety (DASS-21 claims I have severe/extremely severe both) bc if I did I'd be in my room in bed all day or curled up in a corner screaming. I function. I cope. I'm fine, right?

(the dozens of deep self harm wounds, the sixteen days straight I've harmed multiple times a day, every day, might beg to differ. but I'm coping, right?)

[11oh1]

eytys ‘Vertigo’ boots

[autoneurotic]

nooo not a lazy graphic novel idea for my AU where zoe and agnes meet !

The drive from Connecticut to Massachusetts passed in a blur. She probably shouldn’t have driven, but she didn’t have a choice. Halfway through she pulled off to get something to eat but only managed a few bites before she threw it up. Her head pounded and she felt weak, so weak. She just needed to make it to Zoe, she told herself.

Zoe would take care of her.

The neighborhood Zoe lived in was nice—big houses with manicured lawns and tree-lines streets, honest-to-god white picket fences outside some. The further into the neighborhood she got, the slower she drove, peering at the house markers until she rolled to a stop in front of Zoe’s. She double and triple-checked the address, put her car in park across the street, and waited.

The neighborhood Zoe lived in was nice—big houses with manicured lawns and tree-lines streets, honest-to-god white picket fences outside some. The further into the neighborhood she got, the slower she drove, peering at the house markers until she rolled to a stop in front of Zoe’s. She double and triple-checked the address, put her car in park across the street, and waited.

She wasn’t sure what for. Her nerves to abate? Her courage to reappear? For Zoe to burst through the door and sweep her into her arms, singing apologies and reassurances?

It would be nice.

[kochei0]

I turn to Ares.

Thanks to Tyler Miles Lockett who allowed me to draw inspiration from his ARES piece for page 2! Look at his etsy page it's SICK

⚔️ If you want to read some queer retelling of arturian legends have a look at my webtoon

[spr0utsies]

[greykolla-art]

It’s healthy to step out of our comfort zone’s a little!😜

[drumlincountry]

I was at a Palestinian solidarity gig last night & the one Palestinian artist who was going to perform had COVID so the organisers asked around to see if there were any Palestinians who'd like to say a few words instead.

A local guy who was born & raised in Gaza offered to speak. He started with "I'm an engineer. i'm not a poet or a politician. I don't... do public speaking… I had no idea what to say when I came up here. So i'm just going to tell you about the street I grew up on."

And then he did! He went down the street building by building. He told us about the ice cream shop on the corner, the grocery shop, the charity that supports people with intellectual disabilities. He told us about the people who he knew growing up, the families who still live in the different houses. He told us about the university buildings and about his friends who quit being accountants to start a band together. All on that street.

All of which is gone now, by the way. Bombed to dust.

[tofixtheshadows]

I've been thinking a lot lately about how Kabru deprives himself.

Kabru as a character is intertwined with the idea that sometimes we have to sacrifice the needs of the few for the good of the many. He ultimately subverts this first by sabotaging the Canaries and then by letting Laios go, but in practice he's already been living a life of self-sacrifice.

Saving people, and learning the secrets of the dungeons to seal them, are what's important. Not his own comforts. Not his own desires. He forces them down until he doesn't know they're there, until one of them has to come spilling out during the confession in chapter 76.

Specifically, I think it's very significant, in a story about food and all that it entails, that Kabru is rarely shown eating. He's the deuteragonist of Dungeon Meshi, the cooking manga, but while meals are the anchoring points of Laios's journey, given loving focus, for Kabru, they're ... not.

I'm sure he eats during dungeon expeditions, in the routine way that adventurers must when they sit down to camp. But on the surface, you get the idea that Kabru spends most of his time doing his self-assigned dungeon-related tasks: meeting with people, studying them, putting together that evidence board, researching the dungeon, god knows what else. Feeding himself is secondary.

He's introduced during a meal, eating at a restaurant, just to set up the contrast between his party and Laios's. And it's the last normal meal we see him eating until the communal ending feast (if you consider Falin's dragon parts normal).

First, we get this:

Kabru's response here is such a non-answer, it strongly implies to me that he wasn't thinking about it until Rin brought it up. That he might not even be feeling the hunger signals that he logically knew he should.

They sit down to eat, but Kabru is never drawn reaching for food or eating it like the rest of his party. He only drinks.

It's possible this means nothing, that we can just assume he's putting food in his mouth off-panel, but again, this entire manga is about food. Cooking it, eating it, appreciating it, taking pleasure in it, grounding yourself in the necessary routine of it and affirming your right to live by consuming it. It's given such a huge focus.

We don't see him eat again until the harpy egg.

What a significant question for the protagonist to ask his foil in this story about eating! Aren't you hungry? Aren't you, Kabru?

He was revived only minutes ago after a violent encounter. And then he chokes down food that causes him further harm by triggering him, all because he's so determined to stay in Laios's good graces.

In his flashback, we see Milsiril trying to spoon-feed young Kabru cake that we know he doesn't like. He doesn't want to eat: he wants to be training.

Then with Mithrun, we see him eating the least-monstery monster food he can get his hands on, for the sake of survival- walking mushroom, barometz, an egg. The barometz is his first chance to make something like an a real meal, and he actually seems excited about it because he wants to replicate a lamb dish his mother used to make him!

...but he doesn't get to enjoy it like he wanted to.

Then, when all the Canaries are eating field rations ... Kabru still isn't shown eating. He's only shown giving food to Mithrun.

And of course the next time he eats is the bavarois, which for his sake is at least plant based ... but he still has to use a coping mechanism to get through it.

I don't think Kabru does this all on purpose. I think Kui does this all on purpose. Kabru's Post Traumatic Stress Disorder should be understood as informing his character just as much as Laios's autism informs his. It's another way that Kabru and Laios act as foils: where Laios takes pleasure in meals and approaches food with the excitement of discovery, Kabru's experiences with eating are tainted by his trauma. Laios indulges; Kabru denies himself. Laios is shown enjoying food, Kabru is shown struggling with it.

And I can very easily imagine a reason why Kabru might have a subconscious aversion towards eating.

Meals are the privilege of the living.

[theoldkyokodied]

Really quick doodles of a few scenes from the stream yesterday. Including combat flirting taunting, gale’s magnificently distracting shoes and.. whatever you wanna call gale agreeing to give 15 gold to astarion 😐😑😐😑😐 (that’s me blinking)

[elfohim]

eldest daughter shenanigans

[arundolyn]

everybody shut up this post is exiga nail now. get nailed idiot

[redstonedust]

the mr. beast extension isnt always great at identifying what a video thumbnail is

[sabertoothwalrus]

uh oh !

[candycoatedrox]

me on my way to pull the same bullshit i did with the last wade drawing where i'm gonna have 12 different colors for the eyes alone (last time it was 15. this is an improvement)

[mytortoisegotstuckinatupperware]

THANK YOU. JESUS CHRIST THIS DRIVES ME INSANE EVERY FUCKING TIME BE NICE TO THE PSYCHROLUTES GOD

[bisexualpercyjacksons]

pjo tv show episode 5 alignment: