#Gosh I spent way too much time on this piece but I really how it turned out so worth it

[loopyarts]

Happy two weeks and a day late Easter. Here have some cute bunny boys. :3c

[bellaxgiornata]

All These Years [Part 4: "All the Broken Pieces"]

Pairing: Matt Murdock x Fem!Reader

Summary: You met Matthew Murdock unexpectedly at Columbia University and you couldn't deny that there was an instant attraction–for you. But for Matt, you became as close of a friend to him as Foggy did. As the years pass by, your feelings only grow for your best friend, but all you can do is watch as he dates and sleeps with every other woman on campus and eventually in New York City but you.

Warnings/tags: 18+ for this series; contains emotional hurt with no comfort until the final installments, angst, pining, friends to lovers, slowburn, and eventually smut

Word Count: 4.4k

a/n: Our next update is finally here! This one features a very sad Matty and more pining. Hope you're enjoying the pain still because there's more to go! You can find the entire list of installments for this series here. Our next update will be "Graduation" I believe and it should be the end of our college pining days (but the start of more pining post-college).

Tag list: @theetherealbloom @acharliecoxedfan @rotscinema @magnumstyles @roseallisonparker @readerhead @paracosmic-murdock @v4leoftears @why-always-me-gosh-please @redbircl @keepingitlokiii @yarrystyleeza @ofmusesandsecrets (for some reason tumblr isn't letting me tag you, friend!)

You were currently slumped over your laptop on your bed focused on your assignment. You’d wanted to get a headstart on it, grateful that for once your roommate was going to be at her boyfriend’s dorm for the entire night and not yours–a rare occurrence on a Saturday night. So rare you’d even canceled your Saturday night plans with Foggy for the first time ever earlier today because of it. Though he’d been understanding and almost excited because he’d later told you that he’d scored a date with Marci for the evening. You were happy for him, looking forward to grabbing coffee tomorrow morning to hear how the date had gone.

Though there was a part of you that felt a bit lonely just sitting here on your bed working on homework all by yourself on a Saturday night. It wasn’t exactly the most exciting way to spend an evening in college, but it wasn’t like you had too many others to spend your time with. Sure, you had another group of friends you'd made from classes that you occasionally spent time with when you weren't with Foggy and Matt pre-Elektra. But really, deep down, there was still only one person you wished you could be with tonight. But that was never going to happen. 

Matt was still with Elektra. It had been just over three weeks since you and Foggy had accidentally walked in on them having sex and Matt had said some hurtful things before you’d said some in return. You’d barely seen him since, which didn’t really surprise you. The one time you had run into him briefly you'd been with Foggy. Matt had tried to apologize to you again for what he'd done and said. In return you'd offered him a clipped apology as well. It had seemed like he'd wanted to say more, but of course Elektra had called and interrupted. And that had been that. You had tried not to think too much about it since, busying yourself with schoolwork. It had gotten to be far too painful for you to be around Matt. 

With a huff you glanced down, noticing the time on your laptop and realizing it was close to when Foggy was going on that date with Marci. You picked up your phone and flipped it open before taking a moment to scroll through your text messages until you found Foggy's name. You pulled up a new text and began typing up a message. 

6:42PM:  Hey Fog, good luck on your date! I want the details tomorrow!

Closing your phone, you set it back on the bed beside you as you focused on your assignment again. It was barely a minute later before the sound of your phone vibrating met your ears and interrupted your focus, though. Absently you reached out, picking it up and flipping it open to read Foggy's text.

FOGGY 6:43PM:  Might have to cancel on her :(

You frowned, your eyes narrowing as you reread the message. Why would he need to cancel on her? He had been talking about Marci nonstop for weeks now. You knew how excited he had been for this date. Fingers flying across the little keypad, you typed up a message. 

6:43PM:  Why do you need to cancel?? You've been dying for a date with her!

Impatiently you stared down at your phone, waiting for his response to come through. What had happened to make him want to cancel his plans?

FOGGY 6:44PM:  Matt and Elektra broke up. He’s a mess. Doesn’t feel right leaving him here alone

Your eyes went wide as you read the text over and over a handful of times, your brain trying to process the information. Matt and Elektra had broken up? Just now? How? Why? And who had actually been the one to end the relationship?

So many questions began racing through your mind. Your body felt like it didn’t know how to properly react. All of your emotions of excitement and relief mixed with despair and heartache for Matt were quickly swirling in your stomach making you want to grab your trash can and vomit. You’d hated Elektra, and you had certainly hated who Matt had become when he’d been with her, but at the same time, the thought of Matt a heartbroken mess in his dorm room had your own heart twisting and writhing in your chest. He didn’t deserve that pain even though both you and Foggy had known the day was coming when things would end.

And apparently that day was today.

Biting your lip, you sat on your bed suddenly feeling torn. Part of you wanted to help Foggy and Matt by offering to stay with Matt. That way Foggy could have his date and you’d be able to comfort your friend. Because you cared about Matt despite how shitty things had been between the pair of you over the past few weeks–really, the past few months. Though you knew if he really needed you, you’d always be there.

But the other part of you was hesitant to offer up your comfort to Matt. You had very strong feelings for Matt still, feelings that he had no idea about. And the thought of sitting with him and trying to pick up all those shattered pieces of his heart that another woman had smashed to bits sounded like absolute torture. Especially because you desperately wished he would entrust you with that very same heart. And you knew you’d happily treat it with so much love and respect if only he’d just want you like that in return. Never in a million years would you ever want to break it.

But you were only his friend.

Eyes dropping back down to Foggy’s text, your thumbs hovered over the keypad. Exhaling a long breath, you knew exactly what you were going to do. Truthfully you didn’t even have to think about it. As pathetic as maybe that made you seem, you loved Matt. And if he was hurting, you’d always be there. 

6:48PM:  I can stay with him, Fog. You go enjoy your date.

Saving your progress on your laptop, you began picking up the mess of scattered books and papers on your bed. Your phone vibrated along your sheets when you had begun to turn off your laptop. Reaching over, you grabbed it and spotted the new text from Foggy.

FOGGY 6:50PM:  No, I can’t ask you to do that! You crazy??? I know how you feel about him still!!

Setting your jaw firm, you typed up one final response to Foggy.

6:50PM:  DON’T cancel your plans. OMW over now.

Gathering up a few of your things, you tossed them into your backpack. You weren’t sure how late you’d be staying at Matt and Foggy’s dorm, but if Matt wanted to wallow silently then at least you’d be able to finish your work while you kept him company. You slipped your phone into your pocket before tossing your backpack onto your back and then you exited your dorm. 

It took you about ten minutes to leave your residence hall and make your way to Matt and Foggy’s before riding the elevator up to their floor. But the closer you got to their dorm room, the more nervous you felt yourself becoming. You weren’t entirely sure what to expect when Foggy had said he was a mess, and you weren’t entirely sure how the sight of it was going to make you feel. Nevertheless, you forced yourself to continue around the corner until you’d made your way down the hall and stopped in front of their room. You took a single, shaky breath in before you raised a fist and knocked twice.

The door swung open a few moments later to reveal Foggy with his long hair combed neatly. He’d even managed to throw on a clean, button up dress shirt that you weren’t aware he’d even owned. You’d never seen him wear anything other than tee-shirts, most of which displayed some sort of band logo on them. You shot him a small smile, one he awkwardly returned.

“You cleaned up well,” you told him.

“Thanks,” he said. “You uh, you sure about this?”

You nodded, forcing a wider smile onto your face. “Yeah. Matt’s going through a hard time and he’s my friend. I want to be here for him,” you answered.

The look Foggy shot you when you’d called Matt your ‘friend’ had not gone unnoticed, but you refused to acknowledge it. Though Foggy eventually stepped aside, gesturing you into their dorm with a wave of his hand. 

You stepped inside and saw Matt curled up over the sheets of his bed, his knees drawn up to his chest and his back facing the door. His shoulders were drawn up tight towards his neck, his head visibly tucked into his chest as well. Swallowing hard, you felt tears stinging at your eyes instantly. You were certain your heart broke in that moment. He looked so small .

“So I uh, I actually need to head over to Marci’s dorm soon,” Foggy said awkwardly, breaking the silence.

Your attention returned to Foggy and you saw the way his face fell at the sight of yours. He opened his mouth, most likely about to tell you he wasn’t going to go on the date, but you quickly nodded at him.

“Yeah, go on,” you told him. “Don’t be late. Doubt she’d like to be kept waiting.”

“You’re…sure?” he asked hesitantly.

Sniffling lightly, you nodded again. “Yeah, go on,” you replied. “Go enjoy your night.”

Foggy mouthed a ‘thank you’ before he grabbed a jacket and left. And then you were suddenly alone with Matt who had remained silent and motionless on his bed. Nervously chewing your bottom lip, you made your way over to Foggy’s bed and slipped off your backpack, setting it down. Turning towards Matt’s bed, you awkwardly tugged the sleeves of your sweatshirt over your hands.

“Hey, Matty,” you greeted softly.

He whispered your name in greeting back, his voice cracking as he did. Somehow your heart fell even further in your chest at the sound.

“Do you–” you paused, wincing at how dumb this sounded even to you, “–want to talk about what happened?”

“No,” he answered.

Your tongue darted out, nervously wetting your lips as you nodded. Slowly you sunk down onto the end of Foggy’s mattress, awkwardly crossing your arms over your chest. Your eyes dropped down to your dirty shoes.

“I loved her,” Matt whispered.

Instantly your eyes snapped shut at those three words spoken so heart wrenchingly softly in the room. Your breath caught in your throat, your heart giving an awkward jolt in response.  God, this was going to be more painful than you’d anticipated. 

“I know,” you replied just as quietly.

“But it wasn’t enough,” he said.

Your arms tightened even further around your chest as if they could keep your heart in place. “What happened?” you asked.

“She wanted me to do something that I–I couldn’t do,” he confessed. “So she just…left me. Without a word.”

Anger clawed at your chest, rage desperately wanting to break free and lash out at Elektra. What could she have possibly wanted Matt to do that he couldn’t? And how did that justify leaving him without a word? How utterly heartless was Elektra?

“You deserved better,” you stated, fighting to contain that seething anger inside of you. “No one should make you do something you don’t want to do. And they certainly shouldn’t punish you for it.” Your teeth grit together, hands curling into fists inside of the sleeves of your sweatshirt. “You deserved better , Matt,” you repeated firmly.

“But I loved her,” he whispered.

Sighing heavily, you shook your head. “Maybe–maybe you did, Matt,” you began, “but I’m not so sure it was reciprocated. Certainly not in the way it should have been.”

You braced yourself for the verbal lashing sure to come your way. For the raging, protective side of Matt that always appeared to defend Elektra. The one that had made you cry not too long ago. 

Instead, Matt sniffled loudly, somehow further shrinking into himself on the bed. A tear managed to slip out of your watery eye and you quickly wiped it away with your sweatshirt sleeve.

“You’re right,” he admitted. “You and Foggy were both right. I'm sorry I was–was such a shitty friend."

Shoulders dropping at his apology, you felt your expression softening as you watched him on the bed. His head slowly rose from the pillow and turned towards you, his eyes landing on you on the end of Foggy’s bed as if he somehow knew you were sitting right there. You could clearly see the blotchy redness on his cheeks and the glistening tracks of his tear streaks. His face was pinched tight, his mouth twisted into a deep frown.

"I'm sorry," he repeated. "You and Foggy deserved better."

Your gaze dropped down again, your hands fidgeting inside of your sweatshirt sleeves. "At least you see that now," you mumbled.

The sound of Matt shifting along the mattress caught your attention and you looked back up. He was pulling himself into a sitting position, resting his back against the headboard of the bed. He looked broken sitting there with his pain written clear across his face like that. The sight alone gutted you. You truly hated Elektra for whatever the hell it was she had done to him. 

“Everyone always leaves me,” he whispered.

Shaking your head firmly, you pointed out, “Foggy and I are still here.”

“Yeah, but you–you left me for a bit, too,” he replied. “And I don’t blame you. I was an ass. But still–you left.”

Your face fell instantly at his words. It felt like he’d ripped your heart right out of your chest and threw it on the ground.

“I didn’t leave you, Matt,” you told him. “I’ve always been right here. I still am. I’m–” you sucked in a sharp breath, “–your friend.” The word came out of your mouth like broken glass, cutting you up from the inside out as you said it. “And I’ll always be here for you.”

His mouth pulled upwards in a sad, disheartened smile. Even from the end of Foggy’s bed you could spot the tears shining in his eyes. The moment one of them slipped out, you were pushing yourself off of the bed and making your way over towards him. 

“Scoot over, Matty,” you ordered.

He didn’t hesitate; Matt immediately began sliding towards the edge of his bed and making room for you. You climbed up onto the mattress beside him, resting your back along the headboard, too. The entire right sight of you was pressed up against the entire left side of him, from your shoulders all the way down to your legs. It was the closest the pair of you had ever really been–certainly the closest to cuddling and crossing the border of friendship that you’d ever been with him. 

You couldn’t fight the urge to lean in a little more into his side. Seconds later you felt Matt pressing further back against you, and then very gradually you felt him slowly come to rest his head along your shoulder. A smile slipped across your lips as you cautiously tested the boundaries, lowering your head to gingerly rest against the top of his.

“Thanks for still being here,” Matt whispered.

“I’ll always be here, Matt,” you repeated softly.

He nuzzled his head further along your shoulder and your eyelids fluttered closed. Cuddling–you were cuddling with Matt. And sure, it was strictly platonic, especially because he was literally heartbroken–you weren’t going to lie to yourself about that . But that didn’t mean you weren’t enjoying every goddamn second of having Matt to yourself like this. Of having him right there for the first time ever.

“I’ll always be here, too,” he murmured, his voice a deep rumble.

The sound of a door softly closing faintly registered in your ears, your nose scrunching at the sound. You stirred slowly awake, eyelids gently raising. But then you quickly squinted, the light of the room bright in your eyes. It took you a moment to adjust to it, but when you did, you spotted Foggy standing at the foot of your bed with wide eyes. Your own narrowed back at him, wondering what he was doing in a rumpled button down in your dorm room.

But then you noticed the weight on your shoulder and your eyes grew wide. Gaze swiftly dropping down, you spotted Matt’s unmistakeable leg still pressed up against yours. Very carefully you withdrew your head from atop his, your eyes still wide. The both of you must have fallen asleep like this last night shortly after you’d shown up. Apparently you weren’t the only one who’d been comfortable enough to stay asleep the entire night.

“Oh my God ,” Foggy whispered roughly, your attention quickly shifting to him. “Did something finally happen?”

“What? No!” you whispered back, barely shaking your head. “No! He’s literally broken up over his ex, Fog. How could you even think that?”

“Because of exhibit A!” he harshly shot back, waving a hand frantically at Matt still asleep on your shoulder.

“We just–just fell asleep,” you told him.

Your focus dropped down to Matt’s sleeping face and a soft smile formed along your lips. He looked peaceful lying along your shoulder, not a crease of worry or a single tear anywhere on his face. His lips were ever so slightly parted and you could hear the faint, even breaths as he exhaled. What you wouldn’t give for this to be a nightly occurrence. Or to be able to gently card your fingers through his hair and place a soft kiss to his temple. For him to wake up and glance in your direction, his eyes creased from a warm smile on his own mouth as he whispered ‘good morning’ to you. 

What you wouldn’t give for Matt to say he loved you .

“So then what did happen?” Foggy pressed.

“He told me a little about the break up,” you answered.

“He did?” Foggy asked with a gasp. “He wouldn’t say a word to me about it.”

Your attention was still on Matt’s sleeping face as you spoke. “He didn’t tell me much,” you admitted. “But he told me enough. And she–she definitely broke his heart, Fog.”

“I know,” he said, tone softer than it had been. “How’re you doing?”

Your head darted in Foggy’s direction at the question instantly. “What?” you asked.

“After last night,” he clarified. “How’re you doing?”

“I’m–I’m fine,” you told him.

Foggy’s eyes narrowed suspiciously at you. Not wanting to talk about that right now, especially not with Matt asleep on your shoulder, you quickly changed the subject. 

“How was your night?” you asked him pointedly, waving your left hand at him. “I see you’re getting back early in the morning. Someone doing the walk of shame?”

A bright smile quickly spread across Foggy’s face, the warmth of it radiating easily around the entire room. “I wouldn’t call it a walk of shame. More like a…walk of satisfaction. Success. Triumph!”

You rolled your eyes. “So you got laid, did you?” you teased.

“Yes,” he answered with that beaming smile. “Yes, I did.”

You laughed lightly, shaking your head. “Good for you, Fog,” you said.

A soft groan came from beside you and your smile quickly fell. Matt began to stir against you, slowly lifting his head from your shoulder.

“Morning buddy!” Foggy called out.

“Ugh, morning, Fog,” Matt grumbled, his voice a bit hoarse. 

A sheepish smile crossed your lips as you glanced at him beside you. “Morning, Matty,” you greeted him shyly.

He froze immediately, his head tilting to one side. “Did I–did I accidentally fall asleep on you last night?” he asked.

“Uh, yeah,” you answered awkwardly. “But I guess I fell asleep on you, too. So…I guess that makes us even?”

His lips curled up slightly at the corners, his expression a little brighter than when you’d first shown up last night. The sight alone warmed you.

“So who wants to hit up the dining hall for breakfast?” Foggy asked enthusiastically. “I could go for all of the bacon and eggs. Like literally all of it.”

“Your night went well, I take it?” Matt asked, voice still rough from sleep as his attention turned towards Fog.

“Yes it did my friend,” Foggy replied excitedly. “So who’s hungry?”

You shrugged a shoulder. It was Sunday morning, not like you had a class to get to or anything. And you did need breakfast.

“Sure,” you said. “I could certainly go for some eggs and orange juice. Maybe some coffee after because you owe me details about your date, Nelson.”

“Oh, I don’t think you want to ask him for details,” Matt cut in quickly, shaking his head. “You’re not going to want the details.”

“Why not?” you asked him.

Both of Matt’s brows jumped up high onto his forehead at your question, a small grin forming on his mouth. 

He was so damn beautiful it physically hurt.

Quickly snapping out of your thoughts, you pulled a face and lightly slapped Matt’s arm. “Gross, I don’t mean details about the sex! I want to know about the date !”

“With Fog, they go hand in hand,” Matt told you.

“So what about you, Matt?” Foggy asked from across the room. “You want to grab breakfast with us?”

You slid off of Matt’s bed, readjusting your sweatshirt and trying to comb your fingers through your hair. It looked like Matt was thinking, his eyes landing somewhere near you at the side of his bed. A few moments later he nodded slowly.

“Yeah,” he answered softly. “Yeah, I’ll come with.”

“Great!” Foggy shouted. “It’ll be just like old times again! The three amigos!”

“Not if you don’t stop being so chipper,” you shot back. “It’s way too early in the morning for that level of excitement.”

“I second that,” Matt said, slowly scooting himself across the bed towards you.

You watched as he rose to his feet next to you, fighting to keep your hands to yourself. The urge to reach up and draw him into a hug, hold him close to you yet again, was stronger than you'd ever felt before. You assumed it was because you'd now knew what it felt like to fall asleep cuddled up to Matt all night. And it seemed that was going to make things even more difficult for you now.

"Alright, well, I'm starving so let's go before the dining hall gets busy," Foggy said brightly, clapping his hands together. "Today is going to be a beautiful day, I can feel it!"

You huffed out a laugh, watching as Foggy exited the dorm. He was definitely more awake than usual. 

"You uh, mind handing me my cane?" Matt asked. "Think it's on the nightstand."

"Oh, yeah," you answered quickly. 

You turned, grabbing his cane from his nightstand. Turning back towards him, you placed it into his outstretched hand. He muttered a soft 'thanks' as he began to unfold it, your eyes watching the deft movements of his hands as he did. 

"Can I bother you for one more thing?" he asked as he worked.

Your gaze slowly drew up to his face, pausing on his own eyes. He was looking somewhere near your chin, the weight of his sightless stare raising the hair along your arms. You could still see the hurt and pain plain as day in his hazel eyes despite the way his mouth was gently curled up at the corners this morning. He was still grieving Elektra. You weren't stupid enough to think otherwise even if he wasn't curled in a ball crying in his bed right now. 

You'd also be lying if you said you didn't wish you could mend all the broken pieces of his heart for him. Fix it back up and make it better than new with the love you had for him burning so hot inside of you. You just wanted to reach up and kiss him. You wanted to find the courage and the words to express how much he meant to you and how he deserved the world.

You just wanted him.

"Yeah," you breathed out.

"Can you hand me my glasses?" he asked. "Don't really feel like being stared at today."

Blinking hard a few times, you pulled yourself out of your thoughts. Clearing your throat, you nodded as you forced a smile onto your face.

"Yeah, uhm, let me find them," you answered.

"Probably also on the nightstand," he offered softly. 

"Right, yeah," you mumbled.

Swallowing hard, you turned back to the nightstand. Tears were pricking at your eyes and clouding your vision for a moment, but then you spotted the dark frames and picked them up. You handed them to Matt's outstretched hand and watched as he slipped them on. He shot you a little smile afterwards, one that had your heart squirming.

"Thanks," he murmured. "And uh, thanks for staying with me last night. It–it meant a lot."

You nodded, glad he couldn't see the watery smile on your face as you did. "Of course," you croaked out. Pressing your lips together, you tried to control your emotions. "That's–that's what friends do." 

You cleared your throat roughly again when Matt’s head tilted curiously to the side, his dark brows pulling together on his forehead.

"We should probably go before Foggy comes back and yells at us," you said quickly. 

"He's probably already forgotten about us," Matt joked. 

You laughed lightly, wiping a sleeve across your damp eyes. "Probably right," you agreed.

"You–you mind guiding me?" Matt asked hesitantly. 

Your gaze dropped down to his hand hovering in the air between you both. A small smile returned to your face at how close this almost felt to how things were before Elektra had fucked everything up. 

"I don't mind at all, Matty," you answered. 

As you reached out and drew his hand to your arm, you couldn't help but notice how tight he gripped it this time. Something about the way he held onto you felt…different. Almost as if he needed you.

But you shoved that absurd thought aside as quickly as it had come before leading the pair of you towards the dining hall.

[kykyonthemoon]

oh gosh i loved your “a surprise visit” so much that it had me lamenting over caleb again ☹️

if you’re up for it, i would like to request headcanons for caleb with a reader who wants to cuddle him but is too shy to initiate. (i feel for the shy girls whose love language is physical touch 🙈)

thank you so much and have a great day!

Dear Anon-san,

It flatters me so much that you enjoyed "A Surprise Visit" I wrote for Caleb <3 With this request of yours, I decided to turn it into a story. I'm aware that it would be a little different from what you expected when sending me this request. Still, I do hope you enjoy this cute little piece.

For all the shy girls out there, I wish you courage to put your feelings into actions, just as MC does at the end of this story <3

When The Crabapple Blossoms

You had been waiting for a chance to tear down the last bit of the wall separating you both. He also wished for the same thing.

❀ Caleb x Female Reader/MC who is really shy

❀ Tags: fluff, shyness, adoptive siblings who are secretly in love with each other, domestic fluff, longing, pet names

❀ Word count: 1k3

❀ Masterlist

❀ Request

You had always been Caleb's shy little girl.

One day many years ago, when he had just been brought home by Grandma, there was a little girl, barefoot on the grass, holding a teddy bear, coming out to greet him. Grandma told the two of you to quickly get to know each other, but you said nothing and looked down. One hand kept the teddy bear tight, while the other grabbed the hem of Grandma's dress. You hid behind her and refused to look directly at him. Grandma had to coax you for a while before you could tell the boy your name.

It took you a while to open your heart to accept him into your life. You were the little girl so shy that she only talked to him through the teddy bear used to cover her face. Then, on another day, you got lost. You were terrified and cried until your tears dried. When you saw Caleb, the first thing you did was to rush to hug him. Since then, it seemed that the wall between you and him had begun to crumble.

You said, Caleb had such warm hugs. You would always feel safe and comfortable in his arms. A few more years passed, and Caleb grew up so quickly. He began to grow taller, and his arms became larger. That made you feel even more protected. He said, he must grow up fast to defend you.

And you gave him a new moniker: Mr. Bear. Instead of using the old teddy bear to talk to him, you began to regard him as a teddy bear with the size of a human; which was able to move and talk, and knew how to take care of you.

Still you were very shy. Except for that time when you got lost, you never made the initiative to get close to him. All the time, it was Caleb who started first.

“Pipsqueak, come here.”

Simple as that, you would obediently go to Caleb. He would pull you into his arms, caress your hair and gently rub your back. At times like those, you felt like all the troubles in the world disappeared, leaving only the two of you with this simple yet extremely precious warmth. And because you could not say it with words, you used those gentle brushes against his chest as a way to express your feelings.

Then, both of you grew up. Caleb went to the Academy and you started your training to become a Hunter. He and you had both gone separate ways, and there was little time spent at home or seeing each other. But you missed the feeling of being buried in his arms. It seemed that when you grew older, all your emotions no longer retained the simplicity of a child.

You were not sure how Caleb felt about you. You were too afraid to ask, and then received an answer you did not want. You anxiously waited for him to come back home every weekend, covertly studying every change in him. His skin began to tan, his hands developed calluses, and his muscles grew more visible. You wondered, during those days at the Academy, did he have a girlfriend? Had anyone else shared the same warm embrace that Mr. Bear once reserved just for you? You wanted to ask Caleb numerous questions but did not do so.

Since he knew your timidity, Caleb took the initiative in everything, from planning outings when he was on a break to holding your hand in crowded places. He was also concerned that you would dislike it; since after all, you were now a young lady and no longer the child who would follow him everywhere. He started asking more questions like: "Do you want to sit next to me?", or "Can I hold your hand?", and waited for your approval.

Of course, you were happy with the touches. Still you wanted a little more. You counted every day to see him again during breaks, hoping to touch him just a little more. But he never asked for it. Did he no longer wish to embrace you in his arms?

That day, you were silent the entire trip home from the movie theater with Caleb. As if realizing what you had in mind, he spoke up:

“Pipsqueak, is there something bothering you?”

Your footsteps paused on the bridge. Sunset tinted the sky with mild orange and pink, mixed with clear blue. You did not say anything, only shook your head.

“I know when something's wrong with you.” Caleb added. He did not accept your answer. “Say it, I'll help you out.”

You still felt like it was difficult to speak up. Your hands gripped the wooden bridge, nails barely scraping the surface. What to do? There was so much to say, but you had no idea where to begin.

“Some guy made you sad?” Caleb asked, half joking, half serious. You smiled and replied briefly:

"That's not it…"

While all you wanted to say was: No. The only person I care about is Caleb.

But he would never hear that, because you were too shy to say it out loud.

Caleb sighed. He leaned against the bridge, gazing at the sky in the East, while you turned towards the setting sun. In secret, you glanced at Caleb, halting at his shoulder. There was a small petal staying on it; that one must have fallen at the foot of the bridge where a crabapple tree was in full bloom.

Out of the blue, you reached out and picked up that flower petal. Caleb reacted fast and grabbed your wrist just in time. The wind surged. He stared into your eyes for quite a while.

You had been waiting for a chance to tear down the last bit of the wall separating you both.

He also wished for the same thing.

Since a long time ago.

“Well… um…” You hesitated. “There is a flower petal on… on your shoulder…”

Your fingers extended, the flower petal was lifted high by the wind. You glanced at it, as if to say farewell. Caleb still locked his gaze on you. Intense yet gentle.

He had yet to let go of your hand, while getting closer and closer to you.

"Pipsqueak." He called softly. “The truth is… Can I…”

You continued to wait. Caleb was about to say something but paused.

“Ah… Nevermind…”

His fingers wrapped around your wrist gradually loosening. You started to panic.

If I don't say it, he will never know...

If I don't say it, he will leave again...

If I don't say it, we will forever just be brother and sister...

“Caleb!” You called his name, so loudly that he was startled. You did not know where to start. Since when did you start looking forward to his touch? Since when did you hope to be a little bolder and tell him what you really wanted?

Better late than never. You looked at his hand that was slowly retracting, then decided to grab onto his arm.

“Caleb I… I want to…” It felt like something was bearing down on your heart and suffocating your throat. You could not do this. Your entire body trembled. But you had decided to seize this chance no matter what.

“I want to be embraced by you!!!”

After those words, you shut your eyes, your lips pursed hard. You clung to Caleb's arm but he did not feel the pain since his mind was preoccupied with something else. After a long while, when you felt his arms wrap around you, when the sound of his heart beating strongly and clearly heard, you opened your eyes then.

“Come here, pipsqueak. I also want to hold you close..."

Caleb breathed the words in the late spring air, faintly scented with crabapple blossoms; it made your heart burst. This was enough. Step by step, one at a time. There was no need to be in a hurry and let this dream slip away. Gradually, you would find ways to let Caleb know what your heart had to say.

[latteart98]

I keep rewatching scenes from Hidden Love because I simply can’t get over the drama and if I had to pick a favorite scene, it would be the airport scene in episode 7 when her heart gets completely shattered. Listen the drama is packed is so many cute scenes that I’m totally in love with, but the scene that really, really gets to me is that one.

Can you imagine being in SZ’s shoes? Anxious and antsy all night, she showed up in his city despite knowing the huge trouble it will get her in back at home.. all because she needs to ask him in person if he is really dating someone or was it just a lie? But poor girl didn’t even get to voice her questions because his coworker, whom she mistook as the girlfriend, came along with him.

The moment DJX appears at the airport with the lady tagging along with him, SZ’s eyes are on the lady not him. Not her crush whom she hasn’t seen in so many months but the lady. He’s all worried about her safety and mad out of concern for her but all she can think about is “who is she? Is she your girlfriend? You promised me that you would tell me immediately if you got a girlfriend. Why didn’t you keep your promise?”

Notice how she’s not mad at him for dating because she knows deep in her heart that she’s too young for him and he has never seen her as anything more than a friend’s little sister. No, she’s not having any false hopes. Rather, she’s hurt that he didn’t remember the promise he made to her. And as a result, it became apparent that she was no one special to him nor were the times they spent together was of any significance to him. That he was only nice to her because she was in front of him and had it been anyone else, he would’ve behaved the same way. All the while she held on to every memory, every gift like a treasure.

And just because she knew that she never really had a chance with him because of the age difference, doesn’t mean it hurt any less to see him with someone else. She kept hoping against all hopes that she would, eventually, grow up and he would then notice her a woman but she figured he’s already found his “someone better” - someone that’s not her, that will never be her.

And when she gives him one last sad smile and starts walking away, leaving behind the teddy and pieces of her heart with him, it’s a cinematic masterpiece. She’s walking away and with every step, her mind flashes back to a montage of DJX being kind to her and smiling at her and being full of warmth- all the things that made her fall for him to begin with. And she realizes that those memories, those little smiles of his, those gestures are just gonna forever remain as little treasures in her heart. Even before she leaves the airport, when she wishes him happiness and leaves the teddy with him, we know she’s bidding farewell. She’s mentally getting ready to never see him again. Oh, it’s breaking her heart and so is the audience’s hearts. The montage, the walking away first, the one last turn back, the background music, the fact that it’s at an airport… everything was so perfectly put together.

And finally when her brother comes to pick her up, she starts sobbing in his arms. He’s holding her and trying to comfort her through promises of buying her her favorite food or comic books or even beating the guy up.. all silly stuff thinking it was just an online fling. As if her whole teenage years’ worth of hopes didn’t just crash at her feet. As if her innocent little heart didn’t just break into a million pieces.

Listen I know teenagers are dramatic (gosh I would know, I used to be one) and most of the times, the love/crush they have as a teen is cringe and melodramatic… but sometimes, only sometimes they are capable of honest sincere feelings so when it hurts, it fucking hurts. We might say they’re being dramatic because it’s only their first puppy love but God, that’s exactly why it hurts so much. Because it is their first love. Because they didn’t know any better, they put so much of their mental space and time and hopes and fears into this one person and when it doesn’t work out, it fucking sucks. Yes they will move on, yes they will get over it eventually, yes with time they might even look back at their teen self and cringe. But this moment, the moment your heart breaks for the first time whether you are 17 or 30 or 49, it’s not a moment you will ever forget. This moment becomes a landmark in your heart.

[beestriker015]

Elesa x male s/o headcanons

Being a famous model as well as a gym leader, Elesa is no stranger to people vying for her affections.

Unfortunately for them, she is already in a relationship with someone whom she loves dearly, that being a handsome young man named s/o.

Elesa met s/o on a sunny afternoon in Nimbasa City when she had time off from the gym and her modeling career.

While wearing a disguise to avoid being bothered by her fans and the paparazzi, Elesa accidentally ran into s/o as he was leaving the Pokémon Center.

“Oh my gosh! I am so sorry! Are you alright?!”

She asks the young man while offering him a hand after knocking him over.

“Yeah, I’m fine. Just try being a bit more careful ok?”

He says with a small smile while accepting her hand to pull himself up.

“Thank you. My name’s s/o by the way.”

“Nice to meet you s/o, I’m….Elise.”

She greets him after quickly thinking up a fake name to use.

“Tell me, why were you in such a hurry Elise?”

Looking at the ground feeling slightly embarrassed, “Elise” chuckles awkwardly before answering.

“T-to be honest with you s/o, I was just really excited to ride on the Ferris Wheel. I haven’t done so in a long time because of how busy I’ve been lately.”

“You don’t say? Funnily enough, I was on my way there to ride it too! Now this may sound like a strange question, but would you perhaps like to ride it with me?”

Thinking for a moment, the incognito gym leader/model smiles and nods.

“Sure! After all I do owe you for running into you a minute ago s/o.”

“What are we waiting for then, let’s go!”

Gently taking her hand, s/o leads “Elise” to the Ferris Wheel before they get on it together.

Needless to say, the two had a really fun time and enjoyed each other’s company a lot as they talked about various things including their wins on the Battle Subway, favorite pokémon, and fashion tastes.

Once the ride was over, s/o gave “Elise” his number in case she ever wanted to hang out again, causing her to blush a little as they parted ways. “H-he gave me his number! W-why is my face heating up so much?!”

She asks herself before looking at the piece of paper with s/o’s number on it, a smile unknowingly making its way onto her face as she inputting the digits into her Xtransciever before heading back to her place.

Unsurprisingly, Elesa kept in contact with s/o and continued to spend time with him since then whenever they both had the time, leading to the two slowly catching feelings for one another.

Elesa was the first to realize her feelings, which presented a problem.

“How can I think of s/o that way! He’d never return my feelings because he thinks I’m someone else. We’ve grown pretty close over these couple months, so maybe it’s time I tell him the truth. I just hope he understands and somehow accepts my feelings.”

Sending s/o a message via her Xtransciever to meet up somewhere in private, s/o eventually arrives with a questioning look on his face.

“Why’d you want to meet me here Elise, is something going on?”

“I’m sorry s/o, but my name’s not Elise.”

Taking off her disguise (which consists of a hat, sunglasses, and designer scarf in case you were wondering), s/o is shocked to see the beautiful model/electric gym leader in front of him.

“Y-you’re Elesa! I don’t understand, why would you lie to me about who you were all this time?”

“S/o, a lot of people only like me for my looks or my careers rather than for who I am as a person, so I put on a disguise and used a different name to avoid being recognized. When I met you, I was scared that you would be like everyone else if you found out who I really was, but I know you well enough now to see that you aren’t like that. I was always planning on telling you, I just didn’t know how until now. Believe me s/o when I say that I truly enjoyed all the time we’ve spent together, so please….don’t hate me for lying to you.”

Getting over his initial shock, s/o wraps Elesa in a comforting hug, making her blush from the contact.

“I don’t hate you at all Elesa. I understand why you did what you did. Besides, I couldn’t possibly hate the woman I’ve….fallen in love with.”

Hearing those words causes Elesa to tear up as she breaks from the hug and looks at s/o with a smile.

“I love you too s/o!”

He returns her smile as both of them share a passionate kiss, thus beginning their relationship. As a couple, Elesa and s/o are very openly affectionate, neither of them shying away from kissing and cuddling in public. Dates consist of either spending time alone together while watching movies, or partaking in double battles as a couple on the Battle Subway.

Early on in their relationship, Elesa introduces her boyfriend to her closest friends, those being Emmet, Ingo, and Skyla, who thankfully get along with s/o quite well.

(S/o does his best to comfort his girlfriend when Ingo suddenly disappears one day without a trace, but she and his brother Emmet never stop mourning the missing Subway Boss.)

Despite not being a trainer himself, all of Elesa’s pokémon love s/o, especially her two Emolga who enjoy perching on his shoulders, which their trainer gushes over every time they do so.

“That’s so cute! I need to take a picture of this s/o! Don’t move!”

S/o is always extremely supportive of his girlfriend, whether she’s doing a gym battle or a photo shoot, which Elesa is very much grateful for.

“Thank you for being there for me today s/o, I appreciate it greatly.”

He smiles and gives her a quick kiss on the cheek.

“No thanks necessary babe! I’ll support you in whatever you’re doing no matter what! What kind of boyfriend would I be if I didn’t?”

She smiles and kisses him back, happy to have such an amazing partner.

Jealousy in their relationship is uncommon, but definitely exists.

Elesa gets jealous whenever one of her gym trainers (or sometimes the occasional challenger) flirts with s/o or make comments about him, which he wastes no time reassuring her about.

“One of the girls was talking you up today s/o, I would’ve lost my cool if it weren’t for the gym battle I was having being so intense.”

She huffs in annoyance as s/o hugs her affectionately.

“Pay them no mind babe. You’re the only woman who has my heart Elesa, I love you and you alone.”

S/o gets jealous from all his girlfriend’s fans, which Elesa admittedly finds kinda cute.

“Must your male fans act like shameless simps! Some of the things they say just makes my blood boil Don’t they understand that you’re in a relationship?!”

Elesa giggles while calming down her angry boyfriend with a shoulder rub.

“Aww, no need to get upset dear. My love shines only for you. You’re the light of my life, and nothing or no one will change that.”

Speaking of her fans, Elesa will not tolerate anyone speaking ill of her boyfriend.

“I don’t appreciate what you just said about my s/o. Who I date is my choice, not yours! Now either apologize to my boyfriend and keep your opinion to yourself or leave!”

It always makes s/o’s heart flutter when Elesa gets protective of him, and he’ll do the same if any of her fans get out of line.

“Hey! I saw where your hand was going pal! Try touching her like that again and I’ll break every bone in your body!”

Only on special occasions such as birthdays and anniversaries will s/o and Elesa ride the Ferries Wheel, as it holds special meaning to them both because it’s where they first met.

For their second anniversary, s/o proposes to Elesa while they ride the Ferris Wheel, earning a very emotional response from her.

“This is the most romantic thing ever! Yes! Of course I’ll marry you s/o!

She exclaims gleefully with happy tears in her eyes before pulling her boyfriend turned fiancé into a warm embrace and kissing him repeatedly.

When it comes time for them to get off, the engagement ring on Elesa’s finger shimmers in the moonlight as she walks home with her beloved s/o, the love she has for him shining brighter than a thousand suns.

[fountainpenguin]

Riddle watches New Wish - Post #12

Stanky Danky

Me: Huh, Mark's extended family must have stopped dropping by to eat the pollution. Mr. Guzman: There's even trash in space! Me: oh no

I like how Hazel consistently wears her hair covering at night. The first time I heard this show would have a black girl for a protagonist (like a year+ ago), I was really nervous about whether it would be handled well- I'd braced myself for "trying too hard to score diversity points."

I have to say, I've liked the hair style variety within her own family, and I feel like there have been more black background characters than I remember from the OG show (though I didn't go practically frame by frame in the OG like I'm doing for this liveblog).

I didn't say it in "Trial or Hair-or," but I enjoyed how Hazel formed a stronger bond with and love for her hair, as I feel like that would be important to her personal identity. I like how she always wears this hair covering to bed. Little details like that make me feel so much more at ease about something I was really nervous about for what feels like 15 months.

SLKDJFSLDKJF Cosmo and Wanda are still sleeping in separate beds. I mean, that's standard Fairy culture in my 'fics, so it works for me.

Trash monster is nice! Didn't see that coming.

Hazel: I wish he could speak at least a few words? /wish granted and he can speak only a few words

I knew it, Kennueth IS on a cliff in that poster. I'm surprised Hazel had to wish for him to breathe air last episode.

Uh-oh, it's Dimmadome time- WHAT DO YOU MEAN "one-time use helicopter??" Sir, you can't bring that to an event about polluting less and saving the earth! ... Is Dale in there? I have to assume so. I've been missing him.

Me: Aww, Dale looks just like his old self! Awesome, and easier to recognize when he's not panning across the- OH MY GOSH!!! Dale: When I was your age, I spent my Saturdays working in a factory underneath a lemonade stand >:/ (Pulls out photo of him from "Nectar of the Odds"

Sir. SIR!! Do not repeat the abuse cycle with your son!

-> I hate that he just carries this around. Dale, you need to let it go. And maybe sue Vicky, idk.

I'm CRYING, I love how they gave him false teeth. That's hilarious.

The boots... That's a Dimmadome, all right.

Like, on some level I'm glad Doug spoiled him after he was rescued from Vicky's lemonade horror show, but I'm gettin' a bad feeling...

I can only assume this family tells horror stories about Vicky. This is the funniest anti-hero backstory ever. I was also going to treat Dale's torment 100% seriously in 'fic, but this is way more fun.

They are not cutting any corners. They didn't even change his backstory; he literally got tormented underneath a lemonade stand for 7 years. That's the one piece of canon he was given in the OG show and by golly, are they sticking to it.

Did Vicky take over the lemon torture pit from someone else?? Did she start this gig when she was 9? Is she gettin' retconned? Hm.

They definitely do not drink lemonade in the Dimmadome house. Please let me see Hazel offering Dev his first taste. If we don't get that as an episode someday, I'm writing a 'fic.

Dev trying to get out of pollution clean-up day: But... is our company even earth-conscious?

Too funny.

Okay, I've been thinking about it ever since Episode 1, but why didn't Dale get a fairy? I was waving it off under the assumption he'd only been underground for a couple days max, but... with 7 years, now I have questions.

-> Did Vicky move her lemonade kids around? The stand wasn't always on Timmy's front lawn, but... Surely Cosmo or Wanda would've detected him if he WAS under Timmy's lawn for 7 years.

WELP, trash monster's upset there's not gonna be more trash to eat if they clean it all up. I can see the problem. Uh-oh...

Why do I get the feeling that Dale has said "Come to Daddy," to the trash monster more than he's said it to his own son?

Hazel's parents didn't come to the trash clean-up?

sldkfjsdklfj he's still got the boots... I hate him /affectionate.

There is something severely funny to me about how they've made it clear they took inspiration from Dale's canon design, but his adult design lost his fluff and cowlick and has sleeker, professional hair. Something about this feels very correct for this art style because I feel like a lot of the adults have shiny hair without little tufts and decorations. I might redo my adult designs.

Oh, Hazel doesn't even know that's Dev's dad because she didn't see his mental pictures in Episode 1. This keeps getting better. I love how she also said "That guy with the ridiculous boots" after I pointed out the boots. Yes, Hazel, we've been over this... He's a Dimmadome.

Cosmo and Wanda in their apartment again! Just chillin'.

I don't know why I didn't expect Dev's drones to be called Dimmadrones.

Dale to the trash monster: You're like a son to me! Dev in the background:

The moon is still a waxing crescent when you're in space? ... I mean, I guess.

Peace of Pizza

Ya know, I'm surprised we haven't seen the Ya Boix drinks come up more than the fact that Kev sponsors them (mentioned in 2 episodes). I guess it's nice that they were depth for a side character, but that surprises me since they're the first thing you see in the theme song.

Ooh, Dev's in the title card! Where's this going?

I like how Hazel was using Cosmo pencil to stab Wanda eraser. She may have fairies, but she's still a bored schoolkid.

I... I was going to cheer that we had a list of names for classmates, but uh...

The Kindness Chart isn't in alphabetical order. I feel like putting Dev at the bottom was a targeted move.

Or it's reverse alphabetical since she's Hazel Wells and he's Dev Dimmadome.

It's still a waning crescent?

Maybe I'm old-school, but "pea pod aliens" is setting off all my alarm bells.

... Aliens are insisting everyone loves pizza, but what if someone's lactose intolerant?

Okay, since we're just coming off the episode where Dale reminded Dev he was locked underground making lemonade for 7 years, I feel like I don't blame Dev for not trusting anyone?

Like, I get the feeling his dad is emotionally absent, but this might not entirely be his dad's doing. I'm not sure I'd trust people either if my dad got yoinked for 7 years when he was my age.

Especially since Vicky's whole thing is that she's nice until she starts bullying. Yeah... don't trust.

sdfklj, Dev slam-dunking his stuff in the trash can and backflipping away. That's so unnecessarily extra.

Does the news never have anything important to report? ... I'm glad Winn brought up the thought of getting their own pizza, since I was wondering about that myself.

SLKDFJSDF...

Hazel: Dev, I have someone here who wants to talk to you! Dev: What's she doing? The Closer: She's trying to use someone close to you to appeal to your emotions. Dev: ... ?? No one's close to me. wtf. /scene change where Cosmo is dressed as Dev's dad.

Oh, this is gonna go great.

Dev, instantly switching gears after hearing "his father"'s voice through the door: ... Dad? You took off work for this?

Ruh-roh.

-> Wanda can read him like a dog-eared book.

So... She- she's gonna report this to Jorgen, right? I feel like she's supposed to do that. She's gonna tell him this kid is ticking multiple misery boxes, right? She's not just gonna ignore this... Wanda, please.

Not sure how I feel about the running gag that so many adults look like Timmy's adult self from "The Big Problem." Throws me off every time and I wasn't a fan of that design anyway, so it feels weird.

HE'S LACTOSE INTOLERANT, I KNEW IT! ... Well, not really him specifically, but I was on the right track.

Oh, this is terrible. Am I mistaken, or aren't lactose intolerant pills like, $10? Does he know? Does he know.

Dev: I thought lactose-free pizza was just a myth?

Dale, you're a terrible father.

Also, I like how a lot of effort was put into converting their designs to 2D, right down to Dev's yellow zipper stripe:

Okay, that's enough for this post... On to "A New Dev-elopment"!

[gourmetjello]

könig x reader : microwave

hey loves, hopefully könig isn’t getting too boring !! i’m quite obviously a könig blog for now but i would love to write about others too maybe a bit later, i was thinking about keegan, ghost, krueger or maybe even horangi? any opinions on these guys? (｡- .•)

you know the drill already -> 2nd person pov (it’s working pretty well!) and english isn’t my first language so bear with me. this will be a more lighthearted and shorter fic! i’ve been promising a fluff for a few days now but gosh, i feel like i would mess it up and könig would be to ooc. that’s just my personal fear though bahaha

also in this oneshot könig is wearing his mask / sniper hood for the first time ( ⸝⸝´꒳`⸝⸝) hope you’ll enjoy! (bunch of dialogue in this one ahaha)

—

the kortac base was always eerily quiet and dark around nighttime and it even creeped some people out. you weren’t really one of them, but you couldn’t deny that the thought of being surrounded by so many guns and other kinds of weapons didn’t exactly make you feel safe and sound at night. not like you spent so much time in the main building after midnight, but still.

one night though, you happened to be in one of the rooms because the microwave in the dormitory stopped working. it’s a stupid little thing, but it did indeed cause a mass panic among the people in the crew! everyone was rushing to grab their already prepared meals from the fridges, trying to get to the microwave first. they got to warm up their food and was all that mattered — however, you totally forgot about this silly tech chaos.

you stood in front of the already yellowed microwave in the shared dormitory kitchen, pressing every button you could possibly lay your finger on. it made a little beeping noise after your aggressive presses, but after displaying ‘error’ instead of the time, you gave up. it just wouldn’t start spinning and it wouldn’t light up either. what a stupid piece of technology!

loud sighs could be heard in the empty room ws your finger gently knocked against the already cracked and slightly dirty plastic shell of the microwave. you didn’t even dare to open the door of it and look in there with maybe a light or something — you were totally scared that you would find some kind of nasty black mold growing in there. which was probably the case. and it made you feel so uneasy! but oh well, soliders are so cheap — you thought and carried on.

you were fine with eating cold food, as long as it had some nutritional value, but when a bunch of people in camouflage outfits passed you with steaming warm meals on their trays, you just had to stop in your tracks.

“hey, where did you heat that-“

but everyone was too busy with eating their soggy yet warm food. they were all eating like they have been starving for at least three weeks! and the way they knocked you out of the way to get to the fridge made you freeze up for a second — gosh, these men (and women too, surprisingly) can drink a can of no name beer like it’s the finest liquid to ever flow on planet earth!

you quickly had to realize that you were on your own in this situation. or well, maybe not a hundred percent on your own because there was that small plate of clumped together mashed potatoes and a can of ice cold soup on your plastic tray. your fingers slightly trembled as you were about to pick it all up and sit down next to someone, pretending that they were piping hot like theirs — but you accidentally caught someone blabbering about how it was such a smart touch to put a microwave in the main building too.

that small little sentence you happened to hear was almost like a god-sent miracle, it made you immediately grab everything that was in front of you and you practically rushed to the lobby of the kortac base. it was pretty dark in there and you weren’t too familiar with where the light switches were there, but it didn’t bother you that much because all you could possibly care about in that moment was getting your food all nice and wamed up.

and guess what — the microwave was working. what a blessing!

you watched as the device light up with an orange-ish tint and you could see your canned soap going round and round on the little glass plate inside. the microwave lit up the entire room with a pretty yellow color, making you forget how quiet and dark it actually was in there.

the sweet little chime that played as it finished spun in your head on repeat like it was the best sound ever, signaling that you could finally eat after a long and tiring day. as soon as you took out the soup, you immediately paced the mashed potatoes in there as well, wanting to heat them up as quick as possible. it was satisfying to see the timer go down, and when you thought about getting something to drink, maybe a glass of water, you turned around-

only to see the barrel of a gun pointing at you.

you could barely make out the shape in front of your eyes in the dimly lit room, but once you realized what shape it was your heart immediately started beating in your throat. as a trained solider, you knew better than to make a sound in a situation like this, but come on. was someone pulling a horrible prank on you?

“who’s.. who’s this?” you asked with a weak voice, what a mistake. you knew you were never ever supposed to form a question when something dangerous was going on, but you had to know.

“i’ll tell you while i pour that boiling can of soup on you, how does that fucking sound?” the voice was familiar, but you couldn’t exactly put your finger on who it could belong to.

“e-excuse me?”

as the microwave finished heating your mashed potatoes up, it made three short beeps and the light stayed on, blinking every once in a while. the sounds it made broke the silence between you and this mysterious person that really wanted to commit some kind of crime on base, for whatever reason.

or maybe you were taking this too lightly? what if it was actually someone that broke into the base and is actually not kidding while saying all of these things? you knew quite a few people that could kill people without even thinking twice, the military was simply a place like that, but gosh, why would anyone say this to their own co-worker? it had to be someone who’s actually a threat. right?

as the yellow light blinked every few seconds, you just had to look up in case you knew who this person could be. and as soon as you saw how low the mysterious man had to hold compared to his own body and weight, you could immediately make a guess.

“könig?”

“huh?”

“what the fuck are you doing? put the gun down!”

it looked like something clicked in his brain too as he heard your voice again and he lowered the gun to his side, or at least that was what you were able to see. he then lightly leaned down but what you saw next absolutely creeped you out — he had some kind of cloth on his face! did this man totally go insane?

“i demand an.. explanation?”

“hm?”

“..like, i need you to tell me what this whole thing was about!”

“i mistook ya’ for an intruder.” he shrugged.

you stayed silent for a few seconds.

“you really thought that someone would break in all sneakily and.. warm up some food? are you being serious right now?”

“you can never know.”

“and what’s this rag on your head?

“rag?”

“yeah.”

“it’s um. equipment. sniper.”

“you’re not even a sniper.”

“shut up. i can be a sniper.”

“is that a t-shirt?”

“no.”

you could barely see what was on his head but judging from the way it just hung down, you were almost 99% sure in it being just an old t-shirt. the idea felt so silly, yet you had to admit that someone in a mask like that standing in this dark room would really make someone shit their pants.

“it is. you could have gotten a.. um, like, fake leaves. like others do. or that net on your head or something. you know, anything that looks a little more.. professional?”

“yeah, ya’ don’t like it?”

“i did not say that, just..”

“want a bullet in yer’ fucking stupid brain?”

“no.”

“i thought.”

“you thought?”

“i thought.”

“you thought so?”

“ja. thought so.”

“your english still sucks.”

“don’t need it.”

you took a deep sigh and you took a moment to think about how pathetic this scene could look to someone viewing this whole thing from the doorway or outside or anything like that. it was almost like you were watining for a cameraman to walk out from behind one of the chairs in the room and tell you how this will be a great scene for their next draining comedy series.

“you do need it.”

“nein.”

“what a great sense of humor you got there.”

“another joke.. and i, eh, really shoot you. understood?”

“oh gosh. okay.”

—

really short !! so sorry, this was all i could do today. thank you for the kind words, the many likes and the 20 followers. ⸜(｡˃ ᵕ ˂ )⸝♡

good night!

[shineonyoucrazyyandere]

So that's what you do, dress yourself in some comfortable clothes, and pack your things as if your life depended on it, giving your reflection a quick glance before leaving your old apartment behind. After a long ride, you finally reach Morioh, checking your notepad once again for directions as if you hadn't read it a few too many times already out of fear of getting completely lost…and you did. Even after checking it so many times, you still got lost somehow! You walked around for what felt like hours and still haven't found your damn hotel! In a desperate moment, you swallow your pride and start looking for somebody to get information from…no matter how stupid you must look with your suitcase under your arm and sweat running down your face. So after looking for a while, you finally reach upon a small cafe, an old blond man sitting at one of the tables set outside the small establishment, just perfect!

“Excuse me, would you mind giving me directions?”

That's the first thing that leaves your mouth as soon as you reach the stranger, which, in return, turned his heads as quickly as you had reached out to him.

“I'm truly sorry to bother you, but I'm looking for this hotel here and-”

You spent a few minutes with the man as both of you tried to make sense of the messy scribbles you made, the man letting out a few chuckles as he reassured you everytime you apologized for your mistakes (which weren't even that deep honestly, just a few spelling mistakes due to how nervous you were) And finally, after some time you two manage to make sense of your messy handwriting and a map that the man had in hands, a sigh of relief leaving your lips as you thanked him.

“Before I leave, may I ask you something?”

He asked, the coffee in his hands already finished

“I'm sure I've met you before. Did you happen to live here? What's your name?”

If it was any other situation, you would be wary of the man. You had just met him, yet he was already asking for your name and if you had lived here! Yet, in your rush to get to your hotel, you simply answered him without questioning

“Oh, I'm not really sure? I can't really remember it…but my name is Y/N! Y/N L/N!”

His eyebrows perked up slightly, a smile slowly creeping up to his face as three other people slowly approached the table

“Y/N L/N you say?”

(2/2)

(Pretty sure this is still trash but I put WAY to much effort onto this to not send it lol 😭)

Too much effort on my Yandere blog? Nah, no such thing. This is the right place to put effort into writing Jojo characters as yandere. I’ll appreciate any piece that gets sent to me dang it.

Gosh Norisuke would be so interesting as a platonic yandere. I could gush over that alone, there’s a genuine nice air about him and I believe him to be very warm and inviting when he wants to be. Though can just be as unsettling as any of the other Higashikata family members. If there’s anything you’re uncertain about, he’s right there to help you at a moments notice. I’ll stop blabbering about it under your submission however

[darlingpwease]

It would be funny if the system did allow reader to become Shang Qinghua disciple and make him a father figure to them as a little treat for being the author.

Shang Qinghua would be a father who will spoil reader. Bonus points reader knows some memes because Shang Qinghua taught them.

Reader probably doesn’t take him seriously at times but is protective of him.

Reader: He may be an idiot but he’s my idiot.

Shen Yuan is probably smacking his fan at Shang Qinghua for this (or perhaps he’s jealous because reader won’t be his disciple like he expected)

shang qinghua is my lil meow meow<33 deserves to be called daddy tbh he is the author after all /hj /affectionate

creator's favourite<3

reader: wow hehe silly guy who thinks he's my dad... I love it in shifus.

♡ unhealthy behaviour, pet names, mention of violence, adoptive family themes, parent/child dynamic (and some pinning from shen yuan but you can treat it as you want); drabble + headcanons

But more seriously, SHANG QINGHUA actually looks like someone who will be a good father to his cute little darling sweetest summer baby boo that he sometimes just wants to put in a box and shake or put in the palm of his hand and watch with wet eyes, trembling.

He was doing research... And it's normal for men to get carried away with cute things... And gosh — who can say that you are his favorite character and no one can be your fan even more than he is?

(one may try to compete, but he prefers to ignore the existence of Cucumber Bro, although he admits that in some things he has a taste, especially with this cute art, similar to how he represented you, as his pfp.)

(he also puts your art on his pfp, because no one else can be your big fan.)

It's not that you are described in any way at all or look especially against the background of other characters — apart from the fact that he may be too self-indulgent when he describes you as candy for eyes whenever you appear, as if you are a character from a much better story, but what can he do??? — and your backstory may look like one of those that he created for a long time and thoughtfully, as if connecting the pieces of a puzzle, putting his mind, heart and hours into you that he could have spent sleeping instead, but!

He doesn't regret it.

Even in the morning, when he slept for only two or three hours, he does not regret that for just a few hours he said to himself, "it's okay, it's okay, just a couple more words and that's it..."

Every author should have two favorite characters in the story — one whom he wants to associate with himself (or next to whom he wants to associate) and one whom he wants to wrap in a blanket, put on his chest, kiss on the forehead and saying that they are gorgeous and beautiful. After all, for the audience, he has a beautiful cold cultivator and a fateful passionate demoness, so he can have his beautiful cold demon and his charming bright cultivator, right?

Perhaps you are not part of Binghe's harem (not his cutie!!! too precious!!! his baby can't be part of something like that!!!) and such a detailed study, which is hidden behind your description, does not make much sense, but it makes him happy, especially when he can introduce you to the narrative, briefly describe or invent what you can say. His cute little meow meow, who is Luo Binghe's senior fellow disciple under Shen Qingqiu's care (no you don't need that character development where you experience bullying!!! he has the right to be delusional in his works!!!), and tries to do something to the best of your ability, even if there is little you can really help...

... You die in a battle against demons. Although in his drafts a plan of how you actually survived, it was also not very pleasant for him to write this scene, even if it was pleasant to describe an emotionally strong reaction, — and subsequent plans for revenge and murder also had some therapeutic effect, — but no, brother Cucumber, he does not feel any pleasant feelings at all from having killed his pet! And he is not at all happy that he killed the only worthy character!!

And your death was not at all predictable because of how pure and catchy you were!!!

"... Maybe a little delusional after all," SHANG QINGHUA thinks when looks at you. Small, with a straight back and an indefinite peak, although he knows that you will become a member of another peak, and this realization for the first time causes him damage to such an extent that he wants to cough up blood. He just wants to get on knees, hug you and shake, but instead can only watch — and when the System says that he can get you as his disciple, since he has already become the head of the peak?

Yes, your participation in the plot is important, but not to this exte–

Not a word more — he doesn't hesitate for a second!

SHANG QINGHUA treats you like a mother hen with an egg, wanting to just constantly take you in arms and kiss cheeks like a proud father, and for sure he has... moments where you allow yourself some tenderness because of which he falls to the ground, covering face, as if you killed him with charm, while you look down on him — at first frowning and worried, then you just pull him up yourself.

At some point, you even begin to like it; one day you even allow yourself to call him 'father' — but when he almost has a deviation of qi from what you call him, you never do it again, even if now he definitely desperately wants to hear it again. But — no way; how will you explain to the head of Qian Cao Peak why your father shifu looks like this? It would be extremely embarrassing, especially if you still had to drag him.

No.

Never.

(you still unwittingly unconsciously call him that several times, though — and each time SHANG QINGHUA understands that if he dies right now, he will die happy.)

Your backstory is definitely the story of an orphan or an abandoned child, even if it has some noble origin, and it's hard to deny that being immediately in the adoring and pampering presence of the head of An Ding Peak, who deals with all economic affairs and supplies in the sect, being literally the peak of logistics, is a little overwhelming... at first. Someone may view An Ding Peak as useless or meaningless, but when all the supply, procurement, economic transactions are circulating around one peak, and this is not something secret...

... can't your loveable father afford to pamper his beloved child?

You were such a sweet and smart disciple who always follows him (at his request, but you could also theoretically disobey him, so he should reward you anyway!), how can SHANG QINGHUA not try to make you smile and be spoiled?

He knows how bad life was for you, he described it all himself, so he only makes amends to you, even if you definitely do not know because of whom in some sense you had such a past, but only look at him as a parental figure who is always ready to help, protect and pamper you. SHANG QINGHUA always brings your favorite food (which you share! wow! this is definitely fate!), gives you the best, sometimes even unparalleled, clothes or things of the best quality — and never neglects you, as if your very presence activates in him all this incomprehensible desire to protect and adore you.

Does he spoil you too much?... Yes — but you forget one fact: he is also the proud father of one little sweet celestial whom he wrote especially for himself and now can shamelessly love them! Period!

Perhaps the only thing SHANG QINGHUA violently opposes is your fights with anyone, even if you are a head disciple and a member of a sect that, in addition to the economy, is often forced to deal with the dirtier and borderline gray or obviously black things common in the world of cultivators, — but SHANG QINGHUA knows that the sect will be destroyed much earlier what will you become the head... so what's stopping the two of you from just living your life together? Somewhere in a house near the city or in a small but rich city, where you can spend your life in a carefree and moderate pace until old age next to him, needing nothing and never shedding tears... a small pond for you or a garden where you can grow whatever you want, or a place where you will raise small or not-so-small animals...

SHANG QINGHUA is not the most active or aggressive person, he does not seek to expand influence at all, as the original owner of the body did, but when he gently combs your hair, looking at your straight back, he understands that this is impossible if he wants you to survive. Yes, he described that you 'didn't die' and even put forward several ideas about what happened to you after, but now, looking at you, none of them suits him. Why should you suffer? Isn't what was in the original novel enough for you? Don't you deserve to live in comfort and safety?

He is your father — not in the biological sense, but in a much more important way, in both of his lives, and it is natural that your future falls on his shoulders, since he has made the past for you and takes care of you in the present. He would prefer a calm, trouble-free life with the flow, but when SHANG QINGHUA looks at you rejoicing at his gifts as if for the first time or trying to take part of his responsibilities and difficulties to help, how can he think only of himself?

Maybe that's why he's here — to make you happy and make sure you'll never be sad again. After all, SHANG QINGHUA gave you his soul, so it's natural that he could even overcome reality itself and time to be there — and if you think about it like that, then everything falls into place!

His ability to take you as his disciple and almost-child, his need to pamper you, his adoration...

“Shifu?...”

He loves you so much that his heart bursting.

“Shifu, why are you lying down again???”

Papa will protect you.

Shen Yuan really tries not to get angry, but when he sees SHANG QINGHUA shamelessly purring and spoiling you, clearly mocking him about the fact that you love him as your 'dad' shifu, the desire to hit becomes much stronger.

It's not fair, okay? After all, you were originally supposed to be his disciple; that's why he called you, wanting to see his beloved spousefu character — only to find out that you are not his disciple. Perhaps it was then that he realized that something was wrong — just as SHANG QINGHUA understood it, who later heard at a secret meeting that Shen Qingqiu, who woke up after a fever, asked about you for some reason, thinking that you were his disciple, and was amazed when he was confirmed several times that no, this is not so, you are a disciple of another peak.

A disciple of another peak? No, it's– no, it's possible, but unlikely. Since Luo Binghe is already studying at the peak, then at about this age he should already have had a connection with you, right? It's strange if the semblance of 'white moonlight' for the protagonist still did not exist at the peak, although your first meetings probably should have already happened. Isn't that about when that meeting should take place where you save him from mockery by appearing in time as a 'famous young phoenix under the guidance of Shen Qingqiu' and saying your cool speech?

Isn't that when you first demonstrate yourself as a domineering and self-aware beauty, but also able to be modest? Where your 'presence alone is enough for everyone to immediately disperse, let alone look or words'? Where were you still an unblemished white lotus that made Luo Binghe take an example from you, whose gait was 'as silent and graceful as leaves dancing in tandem with a wandering wind in a silent bamboo forest' and 'voice similar at the same time to the purring of a well-fed tiger inspecting their mountain in search of the next prey to playfully tear it apart' and 'like the first gentle snow showering everything around like a blanket, covering and forcing all living things to be silent and heed the serenity and greatness'?

These were some of his favorite scenes, excerpts from which he regularly reread and kept screenshots in the "favorite" in the phone gallery!

Where?!

"Someone remembers," SHANG QINGHUA thinks, rubbing his nose after sneezing — and smiles affectionately when you carefully throw a cape over him before returning to his business next to him, deliberately ignoring shifu's loving gaze. You really are a hardworking little thing, aren't you? Of course, what his child should be like; although not at all like your daddy, but you still take great care of him, even if you don't give him some expensive gifts and don't try to physically serve, unlike him. But he likes it — to take care of you, pamper you, try to accustom you to his culture and jokes, teach you some things that later become 'internal' and are not familiar to anyone else.

... Almost no one else is familiar with them.

“You yourself know they were supposed to be my disciple.”

“... The author has the right to make changes to the work.”

Shen Jiu�� No, Cucumber Bro looks up at him because of the slight difference in height, and there is such obvious discontent and irritation in his eyes that SHANG QINGHUA is sure: if it were real, acid would dissolve him right now so that the earth would open up and swallow what would remain of his body.

“Don't you think that such an intervention will have consequences?”

What are the consequences? That you can't pamper them now and take advantage of their care like I do?

“Are you jealous that they call me 'baba' and not you?”

Shen Yuan still hits him with a fan from the heart, but does not answer anything — and SHANG QINGHUA does not dare to continue teasing or pressing button, even seeing how annoyed he is, not wanting to admit that yes, damn it, he is angry that his favorite character, the thought of which caused and causes euphoria, got not him, but SHANG QINGHUA.

“Stfu.”

You don't really call him ''baba' — but if you did, his heart would immediately stop and there would be a serious deviation of qi.

... Hmm...

He definitely found something with which he will pester you now — and the way Shen Qingqiu looks with jealous irritation, clutching a fan in his hand, only adds to the situation of fire.

Even if you don't have the slightest understanding of what's going on.

[rose-tinted-kalopsia]

Holy shit!!! Holy shit holy shit holy shit!!!

Holy fuck!!! Your Kieran Don't Let Me Love You fic!!! Aaaaaaaaah!!! It's so good!!! It so so intoxicatingly delicious!! I'm apologizing in advance for what a wall of text this probably will be and purely consist of me yapping

I spent like easily 2??? 3??? 2 and a half??? Hours just to read the whole thing. It's just so incredibly overwhelming in the best way possible! The way you describe the actions. The descriptions. The emotions. The thoughts!!! I actually took multiple a few minutes break during the time reading it, because it felt like my soul was enveloped in the narrative and I needed to breathe for a second!!

I've been thirsting over the twins this whole day, and Luke is actually the more favorable one for me but gosh your fic turned me into a new woman, NOW I TRULY LOVE THEM BOTH EQUALLY. KIERAN!!! Can't possibly agree more that the premise was fitting to Kieran like it was meant to be. You did an incredible job.

Being the quiet of the two, I really felt the amount of conversations were minimal- but meaningful, every single one of them. It fits him so much, I love the flow of conversations you wrote between the two. You have such a refined way of writing!! It's the ultimate mix of both poetic but easy to swallow for the common folk, it's wonderful harmony.

The pet names were everything. Every single one of them!! But personally, there's just something about being called angel by this guy who wears devil horns as his daily outfit that stirs me up so much. S i g h. I'm whipped.

The sexual tension on the flashback of the first time???? HOOOOO BOY LORD HAVE MERCY. I WOULD NEVER NOT SUCCUMB TO THAT. Such a tease. Delicious tease. I'm in tears. Good tears. I just love how all the boys here definitely can effortlessly carry us around and definitely always make us look up with their tall height. I love how the mention of Sylus visibly stirs some kind of reaction to him and how quick but desperate the whole thing was. That commending voice??? Sign me the fuck up. Please. Pretty please. I'm a putty at this point

Rules are the best. Because rules are meant to be broken. That delicious conflicting feeling of doing something should not be done!! You describe it perfectly and beautifully.

I really love how you imagine him being the closer of the two to Sylus, and it just makes sense so much in my brain?? Like, that's why he's so unaware of most outside things, since he was satisfied to just dedicate and stayed loyal to the boss.

Okay now this part is completely my delusion from your fic, and you might skip this if you don't like the thoughts of someone expanding the premise by themselves which I'll completely respect, but I imagined that- at least Luke had noticed before that fated day. Being twins and seemingly inseparable since little, I don't think there's any way either of them could keep a complete secret to each other. The other will notice. So! My personal delusion for this bit is, that Luke had noticed for a while. How Kieran gazes at her was always a second too long, the little things and gestures he believes his brother usually doesn't do for a single girl, and how sometimes his brother was just a little too immersed with whatever he was thinking, and how it felt different than any time before. But he kept quiet about it, obviously. Since Kieran wants to hide it, and Kieran might've got the feeling his brother had already realized from who knows when as well. But out of respect for each other, neither of them ever brought that up. Buuuuuut, Luke noticed the feelings and affection has grown, unbearably big. So he decided to finally confront Kieran about it, maybe saying a piece or two of his thoughts about it. Warning him, or something. And that's what spurs Kieran desperation and conflict that day. He had been mulling it over ever since his brother actually says something verbally to him about it, and at that point he must've tried to deny how fucked he is by then.

Aaaaaaand I also imagined depending whether both Sylus or only Luke have known, Luke would back them up about that day. Coming up with excuses and such, naturally. Either that, or both Sylus and Luke agrees that 'it took them long enough' (s i g h this'll be delicious angst as well depending if Sylus and Luke actually also have feelings for her) with or without this part of my delusion though, I loved the fic as a whole so so so much!

Okay, back to the actual fic. Let me just say i have a thing about good girl and it ascended me to heavens. Your Kieran has driven me crazy-- The depictions of how different he was acting that day was so good!!! And I really loved the repeating narratives, like Quiet, obedient, dutiful Kieran or Don't let me love you or There's no going back. Each one of them are so lovingly beautiful!!

His pleas! The urgency in his voice!! In his action!! The desperation!! Aaah you wrote all of them so well, I actually kept scrolling back up and rereading the lines and description while still reading it because it's just so so so good. And let's not forget the domineering overpowering attitude.... I'm melting...

I really love the switch between the frantic desperation of the first part to the soft loving gentle need after we finally saw Kieran's face. And may I mention I think the fact you're able to describe him and all his emotions and expression so well while deliberately opting out any actual description of his visual is???? Such?? A genius?? Move?? His action, his touch, his face, his expression, I can imagine it all clearly thanks to your amazing writing, and yet I can freely imagine the actual face according to my own imagination! I think that was such a skillful bit.

I really love the moment of vulnerability between the two, how both of them had each of their own time where they finally broke down in tears. Aaaaah such a good narrative.

AND THE PART WHERE HE CALLED OUR NAME???? AAAAAAAAH DELICIOUS!! BEAUTIFUL!!! BRAVO!!!! I love it so much!! I always favor 2nd person pov fics where there never was actual dialogue calling out the name with Y/N- not that there's anything wrong with it other than my preference, but description of it always appeal me more. So thank you for feeding me in that aspect! Aaah! I'm in love!

The bits of how slow the walls slowly crumble, how even after meeting eye to eye he tried so hard to restrain himself, I love it so much. It felt necessary and shows just how much thin the ice they were threading were. I'm s o l d.

The cockiness of his tease on the Miss Hunter shenanigans??? And yet followed suit with his genuine apology afterward??? Have I said I'm melting?? Because ugh it's such a good pacing.

When all restraints finally let loose and the fervent intense adoration came back into action!! It's so beautiful!! And gosh the confession. The confession. Couldn't have worded it any better... I like that he was the one to confess first and how we broke down from him, as it was always ambiguous more on our side than him- because he had always been able to see us through, but he always put on a mask- literally and figuratively. And I think it's just so so so beautiful.

I loved the ending line!!! As well as the little ramble you wrote afterward <3 can't agree more!! I'm definitely interested to read luke x kieran recommendation you linked at the end... But for now I've got things to do so I'll keep it for now!

Phew, it's really a lot of text. TLDR, I'm in love with your Kieran fic thank you so much I love your writing style so much. Thank you!

AHHH ANONIE 😭😭😭😭😭 i have reread this so many times bc this is so so so so incredibly sweet i'm so floored 🥺 and so honired 🥺 that you could have this much thoughts on something ive written... aaahh my heart's fluttering fr, anonie you've made me so happy 😭 esp knowing that you were able to picture kieran's face without the descriptors? that was super challenging to me but i'm sososososososo happy it came across well 😭🤍

FUN FACT i actually had part of this draft cut out! an entire scene where reader runs into luke while looking for kieran, and then subsequently realizes that luke knows ... so he's like, the push that gets both of them to realize they're not just fuck buddies (a la "we're just friends..." "sure, and friends do that" vibes) HAJDKAKFJA IT WAS A WHOLE THING. THE FIC REALLY COULD'VE BEEN LONGER. but i decided 7k words was enough 😭🤲

but overall i agree with you!!!! i was def biased towards luke at first, but writing this totally had me leaning more towards kieran <3 desperation and conflic with internal emotions or othereise co flict between duty and emotions is my FAVORITE to write, and kieran's character is SO fun to play with, esp with him being the younger of the two! he's surprisingly complex and i loved getting into the intricacies, i'm so glad that was conveyed hehe 🥰 you might be interested in the little analysis i had on kieran's character here !!! <3

THANK YOU again anonie 🥺 i wish i had the words to actually say how grateful i am for this because it's just so incredibly sweet 😭 know that i'm cradling you in my arms!!!

[b3ast0fburd3n]

Extra Eden stuff <3

I got burnt out from artfight so I'm putting my attention back to my fave. Thought one post would be easier than spacing them out. CW: SH mention (in the first one), torture mentions, PTSD mention

She's left handed! It's really only important when considering her self inflicted envy scar, which is on her right wrist because she used her left hand to do it. She learned how to use her right hand for a great deal of things, but whenever she finds a left handed holster or scissors she'll get them one way or another.

Heterochromia- Left=Brown Right=Blue. She gets this from her mother. (Also I noticed while doing art fight that this is common among FC5 ocs?? Like always brown and blue too?? Was there something in the juice???)

Doesn't exactly get pleasure from hurting people, but its one of the few things that makes her fully dissociate and she enjoys the blankness of it. Finally having a quiet mind. The closest she can get by herself is lounging in a lake, but that never lasts long because she feels guilty for not being busy.

^Also, Busy-Bee. She feels like she always has to be doing something which leads to her taking a good amount of initiative on the job. Unfortunately, this also leads to a fair amount of scolding when she wasn't supposed to do something. She takes it on the chin and tries to logic out why it was okay last time but not this time. Severe overthinker, severe under sharer.

Good at stealth. Spent a lot of time learning how to sneak up on deer. Always looks before stepping, surveys areas quickly and efficiently, knows how to take out a guard silently. This doesn't translate to urban environments, though, with too many targets she gets overwhelmed and her thoughts jumble.

90% of the time her arms are crossed over her chest or behind her back. She'll put her hands in her pockets if there's a wall to lean against (doesn't like open spaces behind her) but she much prefers covering her high-value organs. The arms behind her thing is meant to be respectful, reserved for those she allows to order her around, but if she feels the need to be more on guard than usual she'll pace around with her arms behind her.

Doesn't have PTSD (nightmares, flashbacks and such) until leaving Rook and settling on Bishop. One of the worse ones is remembering how she left Hayes to die after beating the shit out of him and cutting up his face. She knows he didn't die there because he was present when Jason tried to kill Vaas, a sight that also haunts her.

Dog motifs dog motifs dog motifs. Everything she's ever loved has claw marks, can't just give a piece of herself it has to be her entire being, kills as an act of devotion, gets mean when she's nervous, loyal to a fault, comforted by a cage, wears the muzzle like a trophy. (The only reason you name a dog is so you can tell it what to do -Richard Siken) Just all of it, you get it, you know, she's just a dog.

I've taken her orange glasses out of her younger design because she looks kinda ridiculous and it takes away from her intimidation factor. I'm also considering making her less bulky and a little taller for design reasons, but I also love hulk women so gosh what to do.

^The glasses are now a staple of her older design (new dawn) because it really rounds her out (wearing glasses, to show that time had passed)

The happiest time in her life is probably in New Dawn before the Highwaymen show up. She's free to roam the forests, no ones fighting, she can live in the woods alone but visit friends and family whenever she wants.

Speaking of other games, because I have so little interest in FC4, the only connection it has is distracting Eden from her father for a few years. She smuggles things in and out of Kyrat, not for a specific side, just for whoever is willing to pay. Its mostly Pagan, but there's some from Ajays side.

[yukidragon]

Hi again dearie~ Sorry but I don't know if you posted anything about it, but, do you have any of your beautiful theories on as to Why, the MC doesn't remember making the deal with Jack when they met him?

It's really raking my brain on if it's important, that they remember or not, and as to what caused them to forget and the reason behind it....

Gosh, you really flatter me with such high praise. Thank you! I’m glad you enjoy my theories so much. 💖

The fact that MC can’t remember what happened is quite interesting. We, the players, are given glimpses in both versions of the demo of at least some of the initial conversation between MC and Jack. The fact that we don’t get to see it all and that MC forgets it hints to me that whatever happened that day resulted in their special bond.

There’s not enough clues to indicate what exactly happened, but I do have my own personal headcanon that I’m using for Sunshine in Hell. I’ve briefly mentioned��in past theories among other topics that I think Jack and MC made a deal that created a bond between their souls. Specifically, they have a piece of each other’s souls.

The reason why I think this is because of the threatening monologue Jack gives an unknown person. He mentions that a piece of him is in a place the person can never reach and it’s growing bigger and stronger. In the “no” route he “taking some part” of MC. I think this piece mentioned in both cases is a piece of their souls, which creates the connection.

Considering consent and Jack being literally unable to do anything MC doesn’t want is a big part of the story, this leads me to believe that MC willingly agreed to this exchange. They can also choose to end the deal at any time.

Now... given Jack might be able to make MC black out, as we’ve seen after their conversation with Ian, it’s possible that he intentionally made them forget the deal. This would obscure the details of it and the limits of what they both can do while minimizing the risk that they might choose to end the deal.

However, what I personally believe happen was that it was an unintentional side-effect of the deal. Jack has spent the past 40 years having his soul tormented in hell. MC has not had their soul meddled with. I think having a piece of their souls exchanged was too much for MC to take and they blacked out from the pain. I mean... we’re talking literally taking a piece of their soul and replacing it with someone else’s. Trauma from intense pain can lead to memory loss, hence why they forgot their first meeting with Jack and the deal they made.

Why it doesn’t cause the same amount of pain in the “no” route when Jack is taking more is probably because their souls are already bonded. It’s possible that he could make the process painless at that point, as he did surround them in a thick cotton candy haze that made it hard for them to think. It might even have been done specifically to avoid making them experience the same level of pain as before when making their bond deeper... with their consent of course.

Why doesn’t Jack tell them the deal? Well... I think we can all agree that MC would have probably freaked out suddenly having a giant clown in their apartment without any memory of who he was or how he got there. If he tells MC about the deal without them remembering that they agreed to it might make them choose to undo the deal, thus sending him back to hell.

Jack can’t let that happen.

Sure Jack is keeping secrets from MC and in ways lying by omission, but someday they’ll understand... they just have to trust him. It’s for the best. He just wants what’s best for them, and what’s best for them is if they stay together... forever.

Anyway, this is just what I think is going on. I could be totally wrong here. We’ll just have to see when the full game comes out when the truth is finally revealed...

@channydraws @earthgirlaesthetic @sai-of-the-7-stars @cheriihoney @illary-kore @okamiliqueur  

[fish-gutssz]

first post!! (its a lis rant)

Ok I've been watching and consuming a LOT of lis content lately and I'm suddenly conflicted on Chloe

now I have always been a bae over bay person for a lot of reasons

1: like my friend always says when asked bae or bay "I just spent all that time and effort im not just gonna go back and let her die"

2: shes hot

3: I know she can be very annoying (I haven't really realized HOW annoying till now) but I've always thought she redeems herself at the end of the game

I've always thought these reasons were great! good enough for me to love Chloe as she is. buuuuuuut recently I watched a WHOLE ENTIRE VIDEO on why a person does not like Chloe.

The video made me realize soooooo much about what I don't like about Chloe and made me start thinking if I should even be picking her over the whole of Arcadia Bay

SPOILERS FOR LIS AHEAD!!

Okay so I have also been seeing a lot of videos around tiktok like those "do you think we're soulmates in every universe?" and its either cute, funny, cute AND funny, or angsty. The life is strange ones are just HEARTBREAKING when I say heartbreaking I'm talking found family trope but then the entire found family DIES in front of the person (or somthing like that). I mean imagine getting your heart ripped out of your flesh, muscle, and bones then it just gets stomped on, set on fire, stabbed, ect. I'm explaining too much but you get the point

one I saw was max saying the "do you think we're soulmates in every universe?" and I go to the next slide and it is Chloe saying: "is Rachel dead in every universe?" WHAT THE FUCK. this brought me to the brink of tears.

Then I made the mistake of opening the comments.

THE FIRST COMMENT the VERY FIRST made a tear fall from my face. I took a ss and can fucking quote it.

"it breaks my heart that as max i destroyed Arcadia Bay for her, but she would destroy max and Arcadia Bay for Rachel."

Hence my soul shattering into a million pieces.

The saddest thing is that this is 100% true, and it had not crossed my mind once.

One of the things the video brought up is Chloe, throughout the entire game guilt trips Max, if you do somthing she doesn't like, she gets mad at you for it and brings it up constantly

Let's take the phonecall from Kate for example, as Max at this point we very much know Kate is struggling, she's getting bullied, stalked, and questioned by David, she's being RELENTLESSLY harassed by Victoria and her posse and also just like most of the school (btw I do not trust anyone who ships Kate and Victoria. its literally bully x victim and it is not ok.) she's also just generally upset and feeling a lot of shame because of her video.

So we know she is in a time of need, she needs freinds and a support system at her side, the obvious option is to call her. (it literally brings her closer to death if you do not answer the call) Max tells Chloe that she needs to answer a call from a freind, Chloe literally responds to this by guilt tripping Max. Basically saying "oh wah! but maaaxxx! you havnt had time for ME me ME for years! but now you have time for some blackwell hoe?! TRAITORRRR" which oh my gosh I mean yes Chloe, Max didn't talk to you for a very long time but she has taken accountability for it and apologized, you have her NOW and can spend way more time with her doing whatever and definitely talking longer that a call. One singular phonecall won't mess that up, ALSO you have no idea why she's calling what if her dad just died YOU KNOW A LOT ABOUT THAT HUH. there is just no reason to be a bitch about it and there's definitely no reason to scold your BEST FRIEND who has been NOTHING BUT NICE TO YOU SINCE YOU HAVE RECONNECTED.

The guilt tripping comes up a lot for frank, especially if you don't try and fail to shoot Frank in the junkyard she brings it up CONSTANTLY even though she is supposedly Max's best friend and anyone who even is acquainted with Max would probably be know by obvious hints how she feels about guns, Chloe isn't just an acquaintances with her she is her BEST FRIEND. Also Max littlerally tells Chloe that guns scare her and make her uncomfortable. Then Chloe expects her to littlerally SHOOT someone? she wants MAX a fucking kind and sweet person to potentially SHOOT somebody. Let me say this again she wants MAX to possibly take a LIFE and gets mad if she doesn't.

Thats not even the the beginning, she's just genuinely mean to Max the whole game when she doesn't get what she wants or hear what she wants to hear, then she lashes out at one of the only people trying to help her.

Although one thing I feel the video didn't touch on enough was the end, the end where Chloe DOESNT APOLOGIZE but she does show appreciation and genuine love for Max, although I feel even that then, she would still kill all of Arcadia Bay along with Max to bring Rachel back.

But also from a BTS perspective? We play as Chloe, She is still very much hurting still from her dads death, lowkey obsessed with Max but from her perspective (and I see why she's being irrational) Max has left her behind and she's all alone, then Rachel comes along and suddenly things get way more complicated BUT Chloe is happier, she isn't as lonley, and Rachel makes her feel complete. After the whole story thing is over the game implies that after that, Rachel and Chloe spend a LOT of time together. THEY ALSO HIT US WITH THAT GUT PUNCH OF THE PHONE IN THE DARK ROOM. So I'm just saying I SLIGHTLY understand Chloe perspective.

ty for reading :3

[waitingforwinterwinds]

ASOS; Steel and Snow: 26 JON III (pages 355-366)

"You know nothing, Jon Snow." - Ygritte, Mother of Memes

Jon and the wildlings prepare to cross the wall, Ygritte finds a cave with secret tunnels galore and lore.

The Reader thinks they should be allowed to take certain 'romantic tropes' away from some authors, and warns drinking game players to switch to non-alcoholics again. I know one thing, Jon Snow: alcohol poisoning is bad for you.

-

... Ygritte reconfirming that Jon basically wildling proposed to her, even accidentally and I spent five minutes staring into space on a mental tangent. Modern AU, the boys are at a pub, and Sam is nervous about proposing to Gilly, and Jon's not being much help, he's a few beers in and his advice is all "just do it." Sam's all "but how???" So Jon gets up, "like this," he says, steps over to a young lady nearby, grabs her attention, drops to his knees and proposes to her. She pauses, then "oh my gosh yes!" And the entire pub breaks into cheers. Someone was filming unrelated tiktok shit and the clip of the "proposal" goes viral. Meanwhile, Ygritte is introducing herself to Jon and joining his table because there's a bloke she's trying to avoid lurking elsewhere in the pub. Shenanigans, misunderstanding, and friendships ensue. Several years later, Jon proposes in the same pub but for realsies. Sam managed to propose to Gilly by accident while he was attempting to explain the Jon/Ygritte proposal that has lead to their fake-dating rom-com.

Sorry, super tired tonight. Focusing, Let's Go!

(Legit though, Book!Ygritte ignoring Jon's clear attempts to shut that shit down in the previous chapter really do colour this relationship in a bad light, unfortunately, between the canon accidental proposal and the sheer number of times I've seen this same/similar set up in someone chasing someone else to the point of stalking and having it framed as romantic by the narrative, especially by male writers who seem to have a secret to desire to be considered that desirable no matter how much of a piece of trash they are or how often they (their character) reject affection it is still offered to them (their character), to (by proxy) live out the fantasy of someone wanting them no matter how they behave because they can't just contextualise being desired in a normal or healthy way... where was I going with this? ... oh right: I've seen this relationship redflag played for laughs so often it's become background noise which is perhaps the most terrifying thing about it as a recurring trope.)

... Focusing for realsies, Let's Go!

I have no choice, he'd told himself the first time, when she slipped beneath his sleeping skins. ... A part, he tried to remind himself afterward. I'm playing a part.

yeah, see, the problem with written word is that there's only so much context regarding tone.

I could honestly read this internal dialogue as either "Jon's trying to cope with being coerced into sex he genuinely didn't want, attempting to justify and rationalise what happened so he doesn't have to face the idea that he was raped" or "Jon's looking for excuses to justify doing it, because he genuinely wanted to, but he didn't want to admit that he had abandoned his oaths so readily when he's spent so much of his life convinced he wouldn't be swayed by sexual interest."

Cause on the one hand: this series doesn't shy away from various form of sexual abuse, but on the other hand, I have way too often seen this type of scenario written in basically the same way, and the author thinking it is genuinely healthy and romantic.

Which one did GRRM mean? I don't know and it bothers me.

... Ah, and there's "you know nothing Jon Snow" back for sex joke meme purposes.

...teenage hormones, the true foe of the Stark household.

... Arson Iceaxe sounds like the online handle of a 12 year old edgelord.

... and meme'd again. Is this the chapter where GRRM subconsciously sensed "you know nothing, Jon Snow" would one day become a meme? should I add it to the drinking game list, do you think? things I add to the list seem to bugger off more quickly once they're on... except for Lemons in that one Arya chapter... (I've collated the list at the bottom of the post.)

"- There are hundreds o' caves in these hills, and deep down they all connect. There's even a way under your wall. Gorne's way."

Oh? And will that be playing a role at a later date, or is this just more flavour text?

"The way under the Wall was lost as well?" "Some have searched for it. The that go too deep find Gendel's children, and Gendel's children are always hungry. (...) There's naught to east in the dark but flesh."

Cave cannibals. awesome. I think I saw that episode of Supernatural. Oh but legit, Cave Cannibals would be so terrifying. Like that movie, The Descent? I think it was called.

🎶Secret Tunnel🎶Secret Tunnel🎶Under the ice Wall🎶secret secret secret secret tunnel!🎶 uhhh, then it goes... uhmmm... oh right 🎶AND DIEEEEEEE🎶

"He's of my village. You know nothing, Jon Snow. A true man steals a woman from afar, t' strengthen the clan. Women who bed brothers or fathers or clan kin offend the gods, and are cursed with weak and sickly children. Even monsters."

Wildlings and old gods not into incest, and understand the correlation between inbreeding and the genetic degradation caused by inbreeding.

Yet more people smarter than Cersei and Jaime.

His guilt came back afterward, but weaker than before. If this is so wrong, he wondered, why did the gods make it feel so good?

I have a sinking feeling, I know which interpretation GRRM was going for.

*casually kicks GRRM out a window onto a safety net below* You live only because we still await the Winds of Winter.

Well, at least Jon feels some shame over breaking his oaths. Unlike Robb.

Drinking Meme Game:

"-There now, there now, yes, sweet, sweet. You know nothing, Jon Snow, but I can show you. -" ... "A dead end?" "You know nothing, Jon Snow, It went on and on and on. -" ... "- He died as well." "You know nothing, Jon Snow. Gendel did not die. -" ... "You're older than me." "Aye, and wiser. You know nothing, Jon Snow." ... "If you want to look, you have to show. You know nothing, Jon Snow." ... "You know nothing, Jon Snow. Noth-oh. Oh. OHHH." ... "He's of my village. You know nothing, Jon Snow. A true man steals a woman from afar, t' strengthen the clan. -" ... "- I thought you'd know to pluck me then for certain, but you didn't. You know nothing, Jon Snow." She gave him a shy smile. "You might be learning some, though."

You know nothing, Jon Snow = 8 x 🧋

[repo-net]

Hi there, Monaca! 😁 I’ve got a question for you (or for Repo-net about you). How would Monaca rank her friends/the other Warriors of Hope? I’ve always gotten the feeling that Monaca and Kotoko actually don’t get along very well even if they act like besties and that Monaca isn’t nearly as close to Masaru as someone might think, for instance. Is that really the case? Thanks in advance & enjoy your blog takeover! 😉

(A/N: Happy April’s Fools too! I’ve gotten such a great laugh about this! Your Monaca post was so spot on that I thought it was some sort of suggested Tumblr post from a Monaca rp blog at first. And gosh you changed your blog theme and colors and everything! It’s impressive!! 😊 Given the current Monaca theme, I thought this would be a good time to ask this but please don’t feel obligated or anything. Cheers!!)

Hello, friend from another land! Thank you for taking the time to write such an interesting question to Monaca.

Hmm, it's been some time since I spent my day thinking about the other Warriors of Hope. My goal is a little further from theirs; and Monaca just has too much on her plate to worry about what antics the four of them get up to. That, and ranking them feels a little trivial and 'gossipy'. But, since you asked so nicely, I'll be happy to indulge you in a few secrets!

4. Jataro Kemuri

Mmm... I don't really have much to say about poor old Jataro, unfortunately. He's just... kind of there. And Monaca feels like he's happy with that role. He says a lot of super strange and random stuff, going on suuuuper long tangets, and all he ever talks about is us hating him.

Which, if he really wants us to believe that? Then Monaca will! It makes him happy, for some strange reason. You can blame his mother for that. Jataro's honestly just really gross and weird - like a worm! But one with value, at the very least. You can never have too many throwaway pieces at your disposal to buy time for yourself, after all.

3. Masaru Daimon

'Monaca's in love with Masaru and how cool, strong and brave he is!' ... That's what Masaru thinks our relationship is, anyways. I get the feeling he does a lot of the stuff he does in an effort to impress Monaca, which I don't particularly mind. But he just feels so needy for the spotlight and to be a 'hero'. He's really reckless and gets himself into trouble so very often.

Frankly, Masaru has his 'redeemable' qualities, if you'd like to call them that. He does care for everyone else in the Warriors of Hope and the other kids in the city in his own arrogant and boastful kind of way, but his motivations are just so fueled with pride of being the best. Monaca can see why he turned out the way he did, but really, I just think he's a little bit too plain.

Still, he's a devoted boy who will never back down from a fight. Monaca could ask him to go out there and fight every adult in the city with his bare hands and he'd probably be silly enough to do it. The 'bravery' and supposed 'courage' he has can be turned into a selfish foolishness quickly and easily.

2. Kotoko Utsugi

If Monaca had to be blunt about it, there's quite the gap between this poor girl and the boy sitting at number one. And even then, she's only up this high anyways because she entertains me in ways the other boys can't. Having someone I can actually talk to about girly girl stuff is a nice way to breathe and relax for once, y'see?

But Monaca knows what Kotoko is. She doesn't love Monaca because she thinks she's 'totally adorbs' and 'so kyuuute'. She loves me because she knows that I know everything that can set her off and turn that freaky facade of hers into a shattered mess in mere seconds. She might be able to fool everyone else, but not Monaca. I know what she really sees me as in the depths of her mind.

But she's more cunning and serves more uses to the grand scheme of things compared to the two pieces below her. Monaca still thinks she's a fraud of an actress, but she wouldn't say that out loud and break poor Kotoko's heart; unless the time finally calls for it and she needs to be disciplined for stepping out of line. Heeheehee...

1. Nagisa Shingetsu

Oh, pitiful Nagisa. It's a travesty; Monaca can see so much potential and talent in him to be something more than what he already is. He can be Monaca's smartest and most reliable soldier, able to handle any task his princess assigns him to because she knows he's capable of it. She expects him to pass every assignment she gives him. But Monaca just can't feel that way about him.

If nothing else; I do... feel amused and charmed by Nagisa's devotion. Out of all the Warriors of Hope, it's super easy to tell that he's more focused than anyone else in our group about the paradise. But his heart is too fragile and too easily manipulated. And that's... dangerous. Monaca knows Nagisa's one heartfelt talk with an adult away from possibly turning against us - and worse, against Monaca.

So... as endearing as Nagisa's obvious feelings for Monaca are and how much he'll do for me to shower him with the praise he's so incredibly reliant on... all I see are the makings of a potential traitor who can't see the world the way Monaca sees it. A shame that him being so obsessed with me is going to be what leads him to break. It'll only be a matter of time though, and he'll finally help me to realize my dream. Doesn't that sound nice, Nagisa? 💚

[miabebe]

Friend! RE: your last post.

I hope you're not too discouraged for too long. <3 Interaction and feedback is the hardest part of the writing game in some ways because it is often harder to come by than the drive to finish a piece haha and you aren't in control of it the way you are in control of the worlds you create. Worst yet, the things we're proudest of somehow tend to be the things we hear the least about. I don't read SVT stuff unfortunately, but I have no doubt you made your work into something great because you're something great. (To that end, I just realized I haven't made time read your Kyunnie chap V fic yet--I will have to do so immediately!)

Please keep in mind, we are a consumption-based culture these days--click, consume, move on--which makes us less likely to stop and reflect on an artist's work. Honestly, the nature of social media is kind of breeding this out of us. People legitimately do not take the time to reflect on what they've read or, also possibly, they really never been taught how. What did this make me feel? Why did it make me feel this way? What moments in particular really made my heart skip or my brain whir? What was most memorable? If readers spent even one minute after reading something to consider this instead of just smashing a heart and moving on, we'd all--readers and writers--get a lot more value out of things.

Worse yet, social media has also bred into us a quantitative culture. If our like/heart threshold is below a certain amount, we've failed, which is simply not true! Is it wonderful to have a story with a thousand notes? Yeah, that's hella cool. I don't have any lol, but that doesn't mean I've failed (we met through our writing, so how could that be a fail, number of notes be damned!). <3 The only way to fail at writing is to simply stop doing it. :)

Another thing to consider, most readers are not creators. They don't really understand the breadth of the effort that goes into creation. (Also, going to be a teensy-weensy bit snobby here, but) They're also used to packaged and repackaged boilerplate smut that can be consumed rather mindlessly. Authors like you, who worldbuild and create meaningful connections for your characters, are a dying breed in this niche writing community, and many readers truly do not realize how mentally draining creating at this level truly is. Also, many don't interact because they've lost the art of communicating those thoughts meaningfully or they're simply too shy or feel too inarticulate to do so.

Anyway, all of this is my extremely long-winded and probably borderline pompous way of saying that it's okay to feel discouraged because your work feels undervalued (it is), BUT that doesn't mean that those silent readers didn't take something away from it! You've probably left more impressions than your notes imply. Do you know the number of DMs or asks I've gotten months or years after an anonymous reader read something of mine and finally came back to tell me what it meant to them? A shocking amount, weirdly. You may have planted thoughts or feelings in your readers that will take some time to germinate, but that doesn't mean they're not there, blooming in secret.

Girlie, your writing is special and far too important to give up on, interactions be damned! Not that you don't deserve them of course, but stay open on your writing journey. You're doing tremendously--speaking professionally as an English teacher and a 25-year fanfic writing veteran. Not everything will receive the hefty recognition it deserves, but it still adds value to people's lives--most importantly YOURS. <3

Gosh I've been so chronically offline, I did not know the sweetest, much needed message ever was sitting in my inbox for so long! @biffhofosho the way your words have an effect on me, be it in your stories or in your messages of encouragement, is like nothing else - god only knows what I have done to deserve such kindness from you <3 You're absolutely right, I feel like somewhere, the consumerism of it all got to me - I've never really written stories with the idea of getting a response, but I think once I got a teeny tiny bit, human nature made me crave for more, only to eventually be met with the usual lack of it? It was a viscous, stupid trap that took quite a while to break out of but I've finally done it, I'm back to writing again :) Thank you for pushing me to not give up on this, honestly, notes truly be damned, I'm so glad to have found you on this journey! I'm truly so grateful for the way you appreciate my work and motivate me to do better, thank you, thank you, thank you <3