#Have ideas but zero health and energy

[captainkurosolaire]

X4 ~ Therapy

Reference ~ Mending Past ~ ♪"Transgender"♪

Fidgeting callous digits drew together, coral incense diffuser carried a eucalyptus scent to tranquil nerves being judder, open nasal-ways passages to breathe palpably again. The bold standing in the seat never felt this got anymore untroubled. Plunged-seeking for help from a dearest hearty found himself comfortable to confine in. Instinctively airing out, grievances, pain bottled within, wasn’t natural. It was attempting to relearn or change nature altogether. Kinsmen would call this act by being here, a sign of definitive weakness. They’d shun him even further, mocking his stake as a man, calling his pride pitiful… Artificially determined by underachievers of our society. However to expose your vulnerabilities, requires unprecedented power. Grit against that lingering, nagging feeling when your entire existence wants to crawl away. Is contesting against what’s supposed to be ‘nature.’ Upon this lounge seat, he was never-braver. A pirate-chasing after the grandest treasure, all forget-to-often, Tormented inner seas to navigate and master; Self-discovery! If someone were to acquire all the wealth in that… One must have to wonder, where’d they stand? Perhaps higher… Of a place not-yet charted to the fullest.

Sweat drenched palms, his throat gulped and dried before, “Ugh, this feels like I’m on a casting-couch n’ th’ local Red-Light District, tryna’ get some virgin hole’s stretched this Sennight.” Doing what often did to everyone who came in-contact, crudely buried and joked it away. Mocking his own feelings-until it was numb, displacing their noise. Throwing a popcorn-shrimp into his mouth with snacks on display, Council was also his Chef aboard too. Across from patient, a kind-hearted, Sea Roe and motherly-like maiden, giving a small-giggle at his remark, “It’s okay. We can wait for you to lax, this isn’t something we need to force open. There’s no-fires, here Cap’n. You’re safe, waves outdoors from us, under that sail-breeze accompanied.” She stumbled-across him when concerned, after nearly-dying from experimenting on narcotics and mixing strong-rum together one-night. Without her keen-observance the Sea Maiden didn’t notice his eyes incoherently devoid of sense, that faithful-Sun. She would’ve been too-late. Suffering more scars-than physically the canvas conveyed on him. Early on taking a mantle. Faltering when it came to multiple Crews. Incurring, mutinies, several enemies, known. Or lurking within depths of the unknown. Bounties that became steep from his escapades of fearlessness. Always targets at his back the moment he donned the inherited Tricorn Hat. From fallen Cap’n who founded this Goldbrand. Inside that-wee-bit part of us that holds us back ushering, whispering like a conniving parasite. Crept-in, saying to flee, run-away. Holding us back from growth-ushering and flourishing. It often won. Looking for any way to get-off-the-hook, from achieving anything, may lead to either happiness or deemed-fortune. Important to often resist that insignificant-part. To combat this requires a shout of frustration, and committing to your declared steps to truly heal. “What would ye’ like t’ ask?” Nerves turned to stone, a deep-inhale taken and exhalation followed. Amusement, candle-lit her visage, before an earnest-smile followed, “We’ll start discussing, what brings you thrill, fulfillment? You’ve a coffer of stories, Captain. They’re written not just upon but through you. Acquiring a healthy outlet to release them may help you astutely, or give room to castaway and relinquish unnecessary weight.” She had an ease sharing empathic attributes. Every emotion someone underwent was her own. Devilishly uprooted, a no-good expression of debauchery collected his features, “Ye sure about that? I could go-listing many pleasurable affairs with vivid details. Can’t say none of those experiences weren't a thrill. Worth th’ voyage my partners I’d bet could vouch fellow sentiments.” Looking to stir-up or shake, but she didn’t waver. Expecting to have her roll-her-eyes, give up on him before starting, hopelessly. As many before-her claimed to be ears. Was obvious she would’ve listened to anything. Nothing could deter her aid, cradled around him knowing just his actual hurt. This what a true-friend exhibited; a Crew? Uncanny, selfishness often was prime here, a believed-necessity. Expect everyone with a knife-of-betrayal equipped Loyalty, if held, resided the strongest-currency. Not glinted gold nor silver.

Bested by her with a pout, seriousness followed his features loosened actually thinking of what her words asked. “I guess seeing dreams realized ov’ others. Particularly my mateys anymore is enough satisfaction. I’ve held many wonders upon this realm. I scoured formerly n’ my shade, claiming Voidal Relics, t’ lost treasures left forgotten and barren. Every-time, I felt further from complete. Would-think with the infamy and power I was collecting, even the fortune I had. There’s no way I wouldn’t feel a sense of freedom sought or grandness. Regardless a gap waged between. Acquiring those ambitious endeavors took extreme sacrifices, not always on my account. I asked much ov’ my fellows. Two-men on the crew who were lovers had much to still-live on and found eachother in my stead, recently-wed, n’ they willingly chased after these materialistic-gains, fer me…  One voyage, required t’ see a difference-make against a War of the Depths that came t’ our shores. Despite their commitment to each other that adventure was seen-through by them. It’d prove the last-moment they shared together. One of them became corrupted, tainted by a relic’s influence, consumed ov’ ration, and killed their own heart; the very partner.” Broke-down and strings inside holding his composure, snapped. Quivering in his voice to encounter realization, “W-what, kind of Cap’n does that? I kept getting my hearties killed! Thwarting away futures not my claim t’ take. Cause of selfishness, greed, to prevent others from having all th’ cards n’ their own coffer? What th’ HELL was th’ justification!? They should still be together…” Balling his fist, nails-delving into his palm until bled. She wrote notes on her clip-board before setting it down. Unknowingly a part of her… Slumbering was strictly-involved in that War of the Depths. Reincarnation of the very-prime-foe. Even beyond both their known. Captain felt it instinctively during their meeting. Soon washed away the notion and mistrusted his own instinct. Because it wasn’t all-true. She demonstrated a whole difference to the advisory, formerly named Siren among Sirens in mythos, who orchestrated and owned an Empire at Depths of the Rohtano. Calmly and understanding from his perspective, “Cap’n we can’t carry everything outside us and blame our shoulders for not staying upright, otherwise we anchor and quickly follow-pursuit of the dead. You said it yourself they willingly followed and saw crucially a mission you-mentioned for that War? What would’ve happened if they didn’t? I’ve to bet more lives lost; War unfortunately is that, there’s no real-fortune any side attains. Always loss-occurs. Think they would-agree that was in-vain? Would they-be any happier or rested souls, knowing their Captain they shared who guided them to another foremost, sabotaged and chained himself because of their behalf? Your survival has a lot of guilt, it’s harmful.” Lowering herself to extend the reach of voice, it never once, impacted a sense of thought or deep-truth to reflect in. Frustration was being quelled, she further descended down to pull him from shallow-bellows of torment. 

As-if her spirit was diving to rescue him, where misery and sorrow; drowns their victims. She attempted to explain with insightful unfathomable wisdom, “Perception carries and decides our reality. Instead of seeing your failure, think of victory. You won in some semblance a War, a tremendous feat; prevailing over it. Every-breath you take on carries extra-life of every fallen hearty you said goodbye, departed to those early sea-bed graves. Look what’ve you achieved, how you’ve mustered courageously, standing against that Past. You’re able to discern; what’s wrong or is containing your gravity. Wallowing is dangerous, making people stuck in-limbo, devouring the Future and preventing a Present from ever-leaving unwelcome shadows. One foot of yours seems to be stuck on shore. While another contemplates a leap to the tides. I’m not saying to forget. I’m saying to swim with your knowledge and experience, forward, forward, forgiving forward.” Her words didn’t instantaneously make a difference, but they were making-brief dents. Never-valuing or understood forgiveness especially towards one-self. Wasn't it easier to quickly throw down the hatch a few-pints of bottomless ale, hasten numbness? No-one wanted to confront-this, or themselves. Burdened with confronting our own burdens. Pain happens when caring. In-the-deep the rulers residing; sharks swam in this manner. Forward, never deterring. It’s all they knew, otherwise they lose breathing, resulting in death. Yet they reigned and exhibited lessons. Captain felt a lighter-sense of him wasn’t an instantaneous recovery but a progressive, steadied one. “Thanks Slafhota, I’ll see ye’ n’ Seven Sun’s same time, aye?” For first-session, it already felt like a right-step towards entering that tide becoming a king of his depth.

[benevolentslut]

.

[veritasss5]

10 advice that you need right now. | pick a card.

Disclaimer: this is a GENERAL READING, take what it resonates and leave behind what doesn’t. This is for fun and should never be taken seriously. This is for entertainment purposes. It is just for helping you to have a general idea about your situation. If it does help you fine I am very happy about it, if not then I am sorry that it wasn’t for you and move on.

Take a moment to relax your mind and choose with your intuition.

(All the art is found on pinterest, if you know the artists please comment their name so I can credit them)

Pile two art is from weibo @/咸鱼中下游

Pile 1 → Pile 2 → Pile 3

Pile 1

1. be happy and content with the things that you have right now. Some experiences happen once and not twice.

2. enjoy your time with friends, family, your lover, anyone that is welcoming you and accept you for who you are. Those moments are golden and they will be a warm memory for your future to remember.

3. clean your room. Having a clean and tidy space can help you to improve your mood. Cleaning your stuff can help you to find stuff to declutter that doesn’t serve you anymore.

4. compassion and kindness can be rewarding for you. Don’t let negative situations affect you, be always kind and compassionate to the right people. You just gave to the wrong people up until now.

5. you deserve a break and vacation. It’s time to visit somewhere that has water like rivers, lakes, ocean, etc.

6. you deserve to be free. Your freedom is one of your rights that can’t be sacrificed.

7. eat more fish. It gives you nutrients to feel energetic, and may boost your brain health.

8. time to look to the future and stop looking at the past. The future is now, the past is gone.

9. you have the right to feel your emotions without guilt. You can cry, be angry and shout. You are human, it’s fine to not be perfect.

10. fill your cup. A cup filled with pure intentions and emotions can help you to welcome the right people that will accept your offer. Be mindful to whom you give your time and energy.

Pile 2

1. choose one goal to focus on. Don’t try to get everything at once. Step by step. All things have their own time.

2. don’t overspend on things that can’t be useful for you. It’s time to spend and invest on things that can help you and have your best interest for your better future.

3. save money. Don’t compare yourself to the people that can’t be compared with.

4. dream big, but go catch on to your dream. Daydreaming and doing nothing can’t help you to achieve your greatness.

5. make your life interesting and aesthetically pleasing to motivate you. Yes, you have something interesting about your life, don’t say no.

6. leave behind everything that is harming you or stopping you to elevate yourself.

7. moon can be very significant for you. Cold night can be significant for you as a metaphor or literally.

8. you don’t need to talk and declare to people what you are going to do. Just do it in silence.

9. right now you have the power to be independent and leave everything behind you to start over from zero.

10. you are able to achieve anything that you desire, just believe in yourself and bet everything on you. You are the best investment.

Pile 3

1. someone betrayed you or disappointed your expectations. Don’t let this slip. Confront them. Better now than later.

2. misunderstandings will be bigger if you don’t clear them as soon as possible. It will look like you are searching for excuses if you don’t address them.

3. bad experience will help you to grow and let you be more mindful and careful of who you confide in and talk with.

4. don’t let bad experiences affect your future. It happened once. Alright, make sure to not fall for the same mistake. But remember there are still people out there that are worthy of your trust.

5. it is time to let go of toxic and negative thoughts and habits. Bad habits create a toxic cycle where it will be harder to break the longer you engage with.

6. you are someone powerful and beautiful. You need to find out your power.

7. there are lessons that will teach you to be confident and strong. Some situations happen because they want you to become better, not to harm you or curse you.

8. you are destined to be independent, charismatic and strong. Someone that can draw people’s attention with your charm and skills.

9. you are very very interesting to know, stop saying otherwise. Be proud of yourself and what you have achieved currently, small or big doesn’t make any difference.

10. trust your gut feelings, they are hardly wrong. Your feelings are valid to be listened to. Let the people hear your voice and see how strong you actually are.

[whetstonefires]

Very fun thing actually about Jin Guangyao is he spent so much time and energy passing himself off as normal. The Normalest Guy, Look How Normal I Am. The Very Best And Most Skilled At Normal Things, Like Being Normal And Having Normal Opinions.

Which is great because on the one hand it reflects how he was kind of aware he absolutely was not. (And that by default this isolated him and this was Very Unsafe.) But on the other you see, with all the times he falls into the typical mind fallacy under stress and projects weird shit onto people, he also on some level believed everyone was doing this.

That being a Normal Person who had Normal Reactions to things, like being appalled by brutal violence, was an elaborate social lie everyone had to maintain to keep up the facade of civil society, and actually everyone was basically the same as him deep down. He was just better at it, and also the smartest.

Which is a very long way to say his character arc is heavily tied up with his evolving relationship with and skills at masking. I'm not gonna armchair diagnose him because that's beside the point, the point is that he is trying so fucking hard to be normal, but without a particularly well-developed definition of what's abnormal about him to begin with, resulting in some misfires.

And then you contrast him to some other characters and it gets more fun. One of his direct foils is Nie Mingjue, who literally does not know how to mask at all, not the slightest bit, but is fortunate enough to have been born the exact kind of weirdo his position in life demands, with special interests in 'saber training' and 'destroying evil.'

(He explicitly, per narration from wwx being inside his head, has no other interests and doesn't really understand the idea of having more than one activity you care about, do not tell me Nie Mingjue is walking around with a normal brain.)

So he is (jgy has a point about this, although he actually makes it about the luxury of having moral compunctions) free to totally embrace the conviction that everyone should basically be their authentic selves at all times, and just not do evil things about it.

On the other hand, and this really illuminates their relationship for me, Lan Xichen is absolutely trying to be normal. Like, he does try to excel, he wants to be best and he knows he's good, but as a person he is also trying to be as normal as circumstances allow.

He understands 'being normal about things' as a goal not in jgy's terms as an elaborate social fiction but as aspirational shaping of the self; if everyone is normal about everything then there won't be needless conflict. Living as normally as possible will optimize your mental health and your respect for others, and it's just a good baseline from which to be good.

Which is fine as far as it goes, but means harmless eccentricity (including gay) is to be tolerated and swept under the rug rather than really supported, and prejudices him to instinctively side with Jin Guangyao and anyone else who is pushing for Let's Be Normal About This, even when the people being weird are in the right.

(This is also to a non-zero degree a trauma response behavior; what Lan Xichen experienced as the largest existential threat to him growing up was something along the lines of being perceived as a selfish disruptor of norms, like his father.)

And then contrast that to Jiang Cheng and Lan Wangji, who are both very concerned at least initially with how things and people and they themselves are supposed to be, and feel some responsibility for ensuring this supposed-to is reflected in reality.

But neither of them makes any particular attempt to be normal about it.

And then ofc Wei Wuxian, another jgy narrative foil, never attempts to pass himself off as normal. He will sell 'I'm better than everyone ever' and 'I'm scum of the earth' in the same breath before he will try for normal.

Except that he genuinely seems to think his most virtuous traits, his throw-himself-between-victim-and-weapon impulses, are basically normal. If not everyone (who isn't a total shithead) does it, it's because not everyone has his insane confidence they can pull it off.

Which in a good mood he would say is fair, because he is in fact awesome and really good at winning. (In a worse state of mind he would definitely hate on all the selfish cowards.)

Nie Huaisang is probably the most genuinely normal human being in the main cast, probably even more normal than Jiang Yanli, and he's very happy to play that up and present himself as actually even more normal and average than he is, in order to keep expectations down.

Up until his whole life gets fucked and this little pretense turns into the most elaborate and successful mask in the entire book.

[daydreaming-jessi]

Time may not heal all wounds, but they can at least scar over.

Future headcanons of the bishops! Just some fun ideas about change and visible trauma, as well as playing around with bodies. Once again they’re all based against the Lamb’s height. Yes, they’re giant freaks, Shamura most especially, they’re the tallest in the whole damn cult, Kallamar close behind. Headcanons are under the cut!

When nari first came to the cult, he was skin and bones, more bone than skin. His vision was badly affected as well, no longer being able to stand bright lights without searing pain and headaches. Eventually he was able to heal up thanks to a certain god’s determination, and quickly bulked up back to a healthier weight. (It’s kind of based off my own cat gatsby, who is now a handsome chunky boi) He still has pretty warped wrist bones though, and he can’t overwork his magic or else his arm skin will fall off again and the process of regrowing them has to be started again, something the Lamb is not happy to do. There’s nothing to be done about his vision, he has to wear a veil in bright lights.

The rest of the bishops were basically rotting in Purgatory, and did not leave their imprisonment unscathed, some more noticeably than others. The body shows the state of the soul, after all.

Leshy seems the least affected, until you realize his leaves are constantly wilted and flaking off, and he has zero energy compared to his old self. Eventually he regains his health, and shoots up like a damn weed, and doesn’t constantly need to sop up the leakage from his eye socket, leaving it to air out at times.

Heket seems normal at a glance, until you realize she’s in the bloated stage of decay, barely able to move about. Eventually her body deals with the mess, and she’s functional once more, however her throat is still a mass of scar tissue, so she still can’t really talk or turn her head very well, and has to go through a lot of pt to work out her neck muscles.

Kallamar and Shamura are the most obvious, emaciated bodies with hardly any muscle mass left, both traumatized shells of their former selves. Eventually they’re able to regain their physique, though they’ll never achieve their old glory days. Shamura is eventually able to regrow a skull so their brain isn’t constantly exposed, but the upper eyes are essentially functionless and their mind is by no means healed, and it’s a constant battle to keep on top of their failing memory.

Kallamar regains no hearing, his eardrums are fucked beyond repair, but being such a diva, he essentially performs plastic surgery on himself so his ears are at least no longer a tattered mess and capable of some decor. If you ask about any of his scars, he’ll gladly regale the epic tales of battle he earned them from, until Shamura is like ‘I have more, it’s just hidden by my fur, see?’ and then it becomes a measuring contest between the two and they’ll have forgotten you existed.

Heket and Nari are just bemoaning the fact their baby Leshy isn’t a baby anymore, and now they’re the shortest of the five.

[morganbritton132]

your little eddie TikTok saga is the HIGHLIGHT of my day and I love checking it at work to help me get through the Eight Hours of Capitalist Bullshit; yesterday I had a thought that might be funny to share - a friend in college told me about how their family adopted a dog that had gone through all the service dog training but was rejected for its temperament, and how they had to basically put childproof locks on everything in the house because the dog knew how to open doors / cupboards and turn on the lights. now, Ozzy is a Good Boy and would never use his training for Shenanigans, but there is another member of the Munson household, one clever enough to leave and fetch help when her human is hurt, who grew up watching Ozzy turn the lights off when Steve had a headache or open the cupboard to get medication or fetch various items when Steve is too dizzy to stand up, and she would have zero compunctions about using such knowledge to be an Absolute Menace. Just imagining the chaos Joan would wreck as a clever cat who has learned All the Tricks but Answers to No One makes me giggle; Eddie's TikTok compilation would be hysterical.

First, I come up with most of the ideas for this saga while I’m at work because working sucks so I’m happy I lessen the burden of living in a capitalist hellscape in some capacity. Second, yes. Yes. Absolutely yes.

I love this because Steve and Eddie’s house would be tailored to make turning on and off lights and opening doors easier for Ozzy which then makes it easy for Joan to do these things with malicious intent. She is a perfect combination of Eddie’s chaotic gremlin energy, Steve’s pettiness, and Ozzy’s training.

She will turn on the light in any room that she’s in but can’t be bothered to turn them off. Eddie and Steve close the pets out of their bedroom for obvious reason? Nope. Joan wants in there and she will not only open the door but also send it into the wall with force, scaring everybody including herself.

They had to start putting the dog and cat food in bins because she’d get in the cabinet and tear the bag open if they are a few minutes late feeding her.

The cabinet that stores all of their medication and their first aid kit is deemed The Very Important Cabinet. It is where anything health-related goes. It’s super important. Joan will get into the cabinet and put her toy mice in there. Steve has opened that cabinet door, a toy mouse has fallen out, and Steve has literally fled the room.

Eddie swears that the only thing keeping Joan in the house is that she does not want to leave and that they never changed the doorknob on their front door to make it easier for an animal to open.

I do think it’s very funny if Ozzy uses his training for selfish purposes sometimes but only when Steve is not there. Steve never brings Ozzy on his semi-monthly platonic date with Robin so it’s just Ozzy, Joan, and Eddie at that house. Ozzy loves Doritos so if he gets a bag out of the cabinet and tears it open then that’s on Eddie for not paying attention.

Eddie tries to tell Steve about it but Ozzy knows how to open the lid to the trash and cleans up after himself. Steve never believes him.

[miscellaneoussmp]

I'm normal, I swear! (<- a lie of the highest degree). I have some fluff ideas I'll write soon. Anyways, here's Mike trying to watch through static (cw/tw: implied/referenced mental health issues and referenced drug use):

It's the cold or some Federation bullshit that's keeping Mike out of his side of the link between him and Pac. He's tried to reach out more than once, but nothing has come of it. He wonders if Pac has done the same. He hopes that's the case. What he manages to get from the link is full of static. Like watching an old television that only just barely gets any signal.

It had been a while, or at least Mike thinks it's been a while before he gets something through the static. Forever is acting weird, off almost. He presses his palms into his eyes, for a gentle pressure, hoping it would make the image clearer in his head. Mike is caught off guard by what he could make out of a too wide smile and pure white suit. He doesn't understand. He can feel Pac's anxiety mixed with the static. Though, it's an oddly welcome feeling. Pac's anxiety already felt like static because of his attempts to keep it away from their link. He tries his best to reach out. It doesn't work. He loses what little he could see. It's all static now. It's cold.

Pac's anxiety has always felt like static to him. Sometimes, it's barely noticeable background noise. Other times, it feels like an electric shock. Mike has to calm his own breathing down. He doesn't have the energy. The question becomes how close is he to absolute zero, where all motion stops? All he can feel is pinpricks of cold numbing his extremities and the electric shock of his other half's anxiety. Mike closes his eyes again, hoping to see something through the static. What he sees is Pac leaving a note for Cellbit. That's not a good sign. Mike tries to reach out for Pac. It doesn't work. It's back to pure static. He gets closer to absolute zero.

The next time anything appears in the static, Mike's stomach drops. In Pac's hand are two white pills. The pills are familiar in the most awful way possible. He knows the recipe to those pills. He knows the effects won't be good. Oh, and suddenly, it hits him. The Federation must have given Forever, and now Pac, the pills. He tries again to reach out for Pac. It was more of a pull, trying to yank him away. Pac pauses for only a moment, but only a moment. Mike can taste the pills on his own tongue, plastic, and the artificial cherry-grape-strawberry of children's cough medicine. Pac swallows, and Mike loses to the static again. He can't do anything about it.

Everything is great, perfect even. That's all Mike gets now, though the static. He doesn't want to look. He doesn't want the visual to the emotions he gets through the static. The high of the pills and hysteria induced borderline panic attack is an unpleasant combination through the static. He can only imagine Pac feeling it at full force. Mike has to keep his breathing slow and shallow if he wants to survive. It's cold, freezing, and close to absolute zero.

[suengmi]

✧ the mirror doesn't lie ✧ 3k, m

this wasn't about chan's validation to your body. it's about your own. it was about how you felt, not how someone else did. it didn't matter than chan loved your body. it mattered that you did.

pairing: chan x fem!reader (plus size/curvy reader with tattoos) genre: angst/hurt, romance, nonidol!au, chan/reader are graphic designers warnings: please be aware this fic is on the topic of certain health/eating disorders and body issues etc. warnings are under the cut! pls be safe!! lapslock and mostly proof read (this is kind of like a love letter to all you thicc baddies, fuck everyone else.) ♡please reblog if you liked! it rly helps and i love to hear your feedback♡

!!warnings!!

mentions/implications of sex, eating disorders, descriptions of food, negative implied weight discussions, fatphobia, mentions of purging/vomiting (no acts done in fic) of any of this triggers you please don't read! ❤️

-

you were never uncomfortable in your body. if anything, you celebrated all of your curves and slopes. it was a blessing to to have this beautiful figure, large chest and hips matching with your full pouty lips.

the mirror doesn't lie, but sometimes the lighting does. when you glance in the mirror, just leaning over the sink, you notice the softness of your neck, the way it gently sits on the slant of your jaw bone. you run your finger along the side of your cheek, the plush flesh sinking in with your touch.

a sigh leaves you, knowing the weight of the words your co-workers rang in your ears. 'we're trying to help you, you'll feel better,' they said, 'if you lost a few kilos, your jaw line would would be stunning if it showed.'

they coated it by saying they'd be able to see your face more, your 'beauty'. as if you weren't already stunning.

in other words, you were ugly. you were not the ideal. gentle gaslighting in their words, laced with fucked up ideas of singular ways of beauty and fatphobia.

you weren't stupid, you knew this was all rooted in the capitalist ideals of beauty culture, fucked up ways to make women into barbie dolls and control them. it was tempting, just to see what it was like to be viewed in the way society wants you, validation pouring into your cup until it runs over.

you hang your head, maybe i should try it.

maybe. just to see what it's like.

-

tiredness was in your eyes, dark circles barely covered by concealer and setting powder. you were a shell, hunger making you irritated the more the days went on. some days you'd just sleep, body overtaken by lack of energy. other days you'd fill yourself up with fizzy drink, laying on the couch scrolling through your phone mindlessly.

your co-worker chan sits across from you, eyeing the coke zero and apple sitting in front of you untouched.

"not hungry?" he asks, slurping a mouth full of noodles as he draws with one hand on the mouse.

chan is somewhere in between some design sketches, half concentrating on you and half on the monitor. one of your favourite things about chan was his smile, the cute way his cheeks lifted and how they pushed up his glasses. he'd always complain about the way they sat but never did anything about it. sometimes, his tongue would stick out just a little bit to the side when he was in the zone. it was your favourite thing.

you shake your head, mind failing to muster up the energy to concentrate on anything. "nah, had a big brekky."

that was a lie.

chan says nothing, eyes glancing up you. he pulls his lips in, mouth curling at the side.

-

a few mornings after, you arrive at your work desk. there's a small tupperware container, sitting just at the front of your keyboard. there's no writing, just a small little heart on the front of the paper. you plop down to your chair, legs running on nothing but an iced latte.

it's food. the one thing you've been avoiding. but who's it from?

you open the box a large sandwich cut into a love heart. it's absolutely adorable, you almost don't want to think about eating it.

"hey chaaaan..." you begin, moving the sandwich around to admire it. it's cute. "did you see anyone leave this at my desk?"

chan shrugs, looking up at you from his adjacent desk just in front of yours, sipping on his orange juice. "i dunno, haven't seen anyone."

"weird." you say curiously, placing it back down.

-

it's been a week, every morning you're met with something new. yesterday was a hearty salad, with salsa dressing. the day before a stir fry, a small note with a heart every time. it has you confused, maybe someone had noticed you weren't eating. is it that obvious?

but this one morning, you decided to go in early to begin on a a large project your company was beginning on. you were actually thrilled about the current work, loving the fact that you were in charge of it this time. unfortunately, your lack of energy had you so damn tired. it had been three weeks since you started this so called diet, you weren't sure you could do it much longer.

when you arrive to the office there's no one there, but some of the lights are on. maybe someone had the same idea. you make your way to the bathroom, dizziness swarming inside your body.

the mirror is the enemy you say to yourself, sighing as you lean on the counter. your company had never been formal, so you were happy to be able to wear whatever you pleased. your tee, now less tight across your chest, and black shorts not as snug as they once were on your waist. two more belt sizes down and you'd need a new one.

it was working... but at what cost?

the sound of feet shuffling enters your ears, your body automatically creeping over to inspect the noise. you lean around the corner of the bathroom, holding onto the door frame for balance.

it's chan, but he has something in his hands.

curiously, you inch forwards, not wanting to disturb him. here he is, placing a small box down in front of your computer. it's a small purple container, a banana placed down next to it. chan steps back, nodding to himself as he goes around to his desk. he looks kind of sad, like he's mourning something.

you don't want to make it obvious, so you rustle as you make your way to your desk, acting as if you didn't just see the man placing food on your keyboard.

"oh shit, hi." chan says, eyes wide with surprise. he clears his throat, eyes darting around. "when did you get here?"

"hmm a while ago, was just in the bathroom." you say standing to your desk. you look down at the package, your heart suddenly swelling.

chan knew, he knew this whole time. he noticed it when no one else did.

a few of your co-workers had mentioned your weight loss but you just insisted it wasn't anything new you were doing. knowing full well it was lies escaping your throat with every syllable. chan had always frowned, exiting the conversation quietly.

"did you... see someone?" you say gesturing to the item on your desk.

"hm? me? nope, nah." he shrugs, lips pouting. "i just got here."

that was a lie, he had been here for a while. the iced tea on his table nearly finished told it all, a few rings of water along the front of his desk.

you nod slowly, taking a seat. your head spins for a moment, neck giving out as you hang your head low.

"i, uh," chan begins, clearing his throat, "have a some tim tam cake, if you want it?"

you hadn't eaten in thirty hours, only thing your body running on was coffee and desperation. a small snack wouldn't hurt, your body needed something. anything. you didn't care if it was sweets. your mouth watered at the thought.

"who eats cake in the morning?"

"me." chan smiles, eyes crinkling at the sides. "c'mon, have some."

"alright then, i'll try." you say, leaning forwards.

chan scoops the cake with his spoon and holds his hand forwards, other underneath to catch any fallout. you take the spoon in your mouth, letting the food slide in. it tastes like heaven. you missed this so much, body practically jolting at the sugar rush.

chan smiles widely, eyes lighting up as you enjoy your food, your eyes closing for a moment to savour it. before you know it he has another spoon full sitting at your mouth, hands gesturing for you to take one more bite. he says nothing as he continues to feed you, his smile gentle and warm.

the sudden carb rush has you feeling weird, your body adjusting to the foreign intake.

"it's so good, who made it?" you speak with your mouth full, chocolate on the sides of your mouth.

"i did." he smiles without his teeth, handing you the last piece. you look down at the plate, realising you've eaten the whole slice. shit.

"i ate the whole thing, oh my god i'm sorry."

"dont be sorry, i have plenty more."

you smile, chocolate on your teeth. chan just laughs, pointing to your face. "you look cute with chocolate on your teeth."

you gasp, hand covering you mouth. "chan! stop."

the heavy weight of food in your stomach fills you, your body rushing with energy the more time goes on. it feels amazing, you forgot what this was like. the last few weeks without proper food having you appreciating every taste.

-

it's around lunch when chan asks you go to go to the cafe around the corner. you need some energy, a coffee will do. you've eaten enough for today.

"sure." you smile, grabbing your bag. you've got to avoid food this time, it's too much.

when you arrive at the cafe, chan spots a seat, slinging his tote bag on the back of the chair. "they've got this amazing ham and cheese croissant, i'll get you one."

"but-" you begin, but he's already off to wait in line.

anxiety jolts in your tummy. how would you avoid this? maybe say you just feel sick, that the chocolate cake has your stomach feeling funny. anything. chan sits across from you, a few minutes later with a coffee and some other drink in his had.

"i'm not that hungry." you say, fingers scrolling through something in your phone.

"you are." he says, tone a little serious.

you look up at him, his eyes trained on your own. he stares at you, lips curling to the side. "i know you're not eating."

"ah, yes i have." you gest, eyebrows raised. "of course i have, i have."

"you wouldn't be over justifying it if you had been."

the words sound harsh. it's almost like a feeling of bitterness, a throbbing stings in your skull.

"i was just like, watching what i was eating. that's all." you shrug, taking a sip of your iced latte.

"not eating is not watching what you eat."

you've never seen him this serious, but there still a softness in his voice. you're thankful it's coming from him, otherwise you'd probably be crying by now.

"why are you being so... mean? it's not your business." you scorn, emotions feeling high from your mood swings.

"i'm not being mean... i just want you to eat."

the words are gentle, forlorn expression on his face. his bluntness surprises you.

you sit in silence, eyes avoiding his. the waiter brings over your food a couple of minutes later, you're thankful for the intrusion, but now you have to eat. it's like you've forgotten.

chan digs in, not waiting a second to eat. his eyes are looking at your food, then back at you.

"eat." he says, almost commanding, mouth full of food.

fuck it. you think, grabbing the knife and fork beside the plate.

before you know it you've finished the whole plate. the fullness of your stomach just a little bit too much, but you love the feeling. it feels amazing, your body rushing with dopamine. the more you eat the more he smiles, happy you finally have something in your stomach. what he doesn't know is the sick urge you have to release it all when you get back to the office.

-

you're hunched over the toilet, hair pulled back by your fist as you attempt to empty your stomach. something tells you to stop, you just can't do it. your body isn't allowing it.

in defeat, you flush the toilet. your legs are cold from the bathroom tiles, lines dented into your knees. you leave the stall, wiping the side your mouth with the back of your hand.

a figure startles you, your eyes widen at the intrusion.

"chan! shit, you scared me." you half laugh, walking to the sink to wash your hands. the man says nothing as he steps behind you. you look at him through the mirror, his eyes searching your body up and down.

"you know what i think?" he questions quietly, manoeuvring himself to stand behind you. his hands raise to your hips, resting gently on the curve.

the touch confuses you, your mind fuzzy from the retching. the feeling of his fingers running across your skin tingles, hands making their way just underneath your shirt.

"do you?" he asks again, chin resting on your shoulder. he's not too much taller than you, but enough to tower the slightest bit.

"no..." you say, voice slightly shaking.

"look." he says to you, nodding towards the mirror. "do you know how sexy you are?"

a red hue appears across your cheeks, ears tingling with embrassment. you go to move but chan holds you in place.

"hm?" he hums, pressing a small kiss on your neck. "tell me."

you shake your head, squeezing your eyes shut.

"you wanna know else what i think?" he chuckles, hold on your firmer.

"yeah." you breathe, hot flushes running through your body.

"i think you look so fucking hot when you walk, your hips are mesmerising. especially in these black mini shorts. even now, your eyes puffy and red, you look so cute."

"chan, we're at work." you mumble, hands covering your mouth. you feel him move closer, hands snaking their way around your waist to press into the plush flesh.

"fuck everyone else." he says, kissing your neck once more.

before he leaves you in your daze he leans to your ear, speaking ever so softly. "the thought of my cock between your lush full thighs sits in my mind, my hands on your chest, lips on yours.. it's all i think about."

-

it's not as if you and chan hadn't talked about it. you were always against work relationships, saying it would eventually end in a mess. he had asked you out a few times, but every time, you had turned him down. it was mutual, of course, a few staff parties you had snuck off to make out, all giggles and kisses, drunken talks about how much you wanted each other. you put it down to just the alcohol and nothing else.

one thing you noticed was how chan had always commented on how nice you looked, how he loved the vine of your tattoos peeping out from your tees. he enjoyed the black and grey tartan pants you would wear a lot, fitting perfectly on your ass and hips. pants that sat on your smaller waist and larger hips were so hard to find. they're probably a bit over worn at this point.

when you think about it, maybe he was right. the worm of this fucked up beauty standard culture wriggling it's way in. actually, you knew he was right. this wasn't about chans validation to your body. it's about your own. it was about how you felt, not how someone else did. it didn't matter than chan loved your body. it mattered that you did.

this was ridiculous, the idea that you needed to fit into something smaller.

clothes are made to fit you, not to fit them.

-

the light of the morning sun through the clouds hits your eyes as you enter the office. it's nice, warm on your skin. today, you decided to wear a purple crop top, black shorts with buckles down the side showing off your swerves, your arms and beautifully designed tattoos on display, if you paid so much money for them, you should show them off.

when you sit at your desk, there's, of course, another box.

you pick up the note on top, it reads: do it for yourself♡

what chan had said yesterday; you can't help but love the validation of your body, you're human after all.

but, last night you hit a turning point. slightly ashamed of how you let yourself succumb to the beauty standards when you of all people were self aware and smart enough to know it's all about profit and control. it's not worth it, the consistent struggle. why on earth were you being hard on yourself when society already is? it's hard, living in a world where control is the norm. there is already so much pressure on you, on everything you do. you start to feel sorry for your co-workers, how stupid they must be to fall for it.

fuck everyone else.

it rings in your mind, chan's right.

fuck everyone else.

chan approaches his desk, hands on the back of his chair.

"i dunno who that came from." he says, pointing to the box. "gotta be a cutie though."

you let out a pretend shock, hand on your chest. "oh absolutely, and he cooks well. damn, a catch."

"oh yeah." chan says, tapping his mouth in thought. "seems like a good to date kinda person, very dateable."

"if only i could be persuaded to date someone at work, if only." you say as you lean back, sighing dramatically.

chan stands up straight, realising this is his moment. "should i quit? i'll quit."

you laugh, his expression is cute, eyes wide and brows raised higher than you've ever seen, he really wanted this. so you give in, allowing him to do a little dance of excitement when you say yes to the question he never asked.

"but!" you pause, "only if you make more tim tam cake."

he stands to attention, hand flat on his head like he's saluting. "will do."

the journey to self love isn't finite, nor is a linear. it doesn't matter that you slipped, it's okay to feel like that sometimes. but with chan by your side, you know it'll be easier.

-

a/n: sorry this took so long (as always) but at one point i'm sure we've all struggled with body issues. if this triggered you, please seek help or feel free to message me! i'm not a psychologist by any means but i do understand the struggle, helps to not feel so alone. remember that all beauty standards are built in structures to control people, especially afab women. so yah this is kind of a love letter to all my plus/fat/curvy babes, you're all so fucking HOT and ur tummys are a BLESSING, remember that pls <3

in the wise words of a'keria davenport:

[zuko-always-lies]

Azula-Katara AU idea (or: Katara runs into an Azula who has changed a lot in some ways and not very much in others)

I don’t think I ever detailed this AU idea despite playing around with it for a long time, since I could never quite make it work, but here it is:

The idea is that Azula disappeared not that long after the war.  It’s now several years later, and many think she’s dead(and it’s whispered in the Fire Nation that Zuko murdered her).  Meanwhile, the Fire Nation is slowly descending into civil war due to unhappiness with Zuko’s policies, and some suspect that Azula is leading one of the factions attempting to overthrow him.

Katara is traveling via ship (to the NWT? to Caldera?), but her ship gets caught in an awful storm and driven into the breakers offshore of a remote part of the Fire Nation. It disintegrates in the power of the storm, and everyone but her is killed. She’s badly injured and knocked unconscious, but is unexpectively rescued as she’s driven toward shore. In fact, the rescue was exceptionally dangerous and required great physical and bending ability to pull it off, but it takes quite a while for Katara to find out what exactly happened.

When Katara comes too, she in a hut and her wounds have been bandaged, but her injuries badly restrict her movement. Soon, Azula returns to check on her. Katara is intensely hostile and suspicious, but her being incapacitated means she has to rely on Azula.

Azula, meanwhile, makes it clear that she strongly dislikes Katara(whose name she struggles to remember) for the traumatic experience she suffered at Katara’s hands, but says that, from Azula’s perspective, the fact that the Fire Nation and Water Tribes are no longer clearly at war means that Katara can be catagorized as an injured, shipwrecked foreigner, and she has a clear obligation and duty to aid people in that catagory.  Azula makes it clear that she would love to dump the responsibility of nursing Katara back to health on literally anyone else, but they are stuck in the middle of nowhere, surrounded by difficult terrain. No one lives remotely close, and it will be a long time before Katara is well enough to hike out.  Although Katara’s healing can help, she has several broken bones and other serious injuries, and those take a long to heal.

Thus, Azula is stuck taking care of Katara for the foreseable future, even though they both dislike each other and Katara has zero trust for Azula.  What Katara doesn’t know (but might eventually pick up on) is that Azula is seriously depressed, along with being confused and broken by what has happened over the last several years. Losing the war and everything else made her doubt everything, and she’s struggled to make sense of everything as she tried to survive.* Azula came out here, into the wilderness, since the area is known to have ruins of one of ancient predecessors of the Fire Nation and is reputed to be a center of spiritual energy.* She wanted to mediate on the meaning of firebending and on the meaning of life. However, she just felt empty and was on the verge of giving up on everything, until Katara showed up.

I wasn’t quite sure where this fic would go after here, aside from Azula and Katara gradually warming up to each other; nothing I thought of for an ending ever quite worked. 

Note that I always thought of this as an enemies to friends AU, not an enemies to lovers one. The reason I chose Katara as the shipwreck victim here is that: 1. I wasn’t interested in Aang or Sokka’s dynamics with Azula, and Aang would be too trusting and positive in any case.

2. I’m not sure that the Azula we see here would rescue Zuko or spend significant time nursing him back to health. She has massive beef with him, far more than she has with any other character, and the temptation to just let him die would be massive. In any case, the story would be taken over by Zuko-Azula dynamics.

3. I don’t think Toph or Suki really have that much beef with Azula, and Azula doesn’t really have beef with them.  They might be a little distrustful, but that’s it.

4. Azula, Mai, and Ty Lee have a complex relationship with each other and a lot issues, but I don’t think either Mai or Ty Lee would be that surprised or shocked by Azula saving their lives and helping them. Moreover, the situation would become about her personal relationship with her friend, not about Azula’s sense of duty and responsibility.

5. Azula has serious beef with Katara, and Katara has serious beef with Azula. A lot of the fic is about Katara very much struggling to understand why Azula of all people would make significant sacrifices to help her.

*Azula really still feels that no cares about her or ever cared about her. That’s not necessarily true.

**Note that Azula has a significant quantity of money and supplies that she was able to purchase from money she had secretly stashed away before the end of the war.

Anyone who wants to write something inspired by this is, as always, welcome to do so. And anyone who wants to comment on this idea is also more than welcome to do so!

[olderthannetfic]

"Friendships are a lot more like romance than people admit" anon here. So I gave zero detail whatsoever, and it's been kind of interesting to see what people came up with in response. That said, I actually meant it a lot more in terms of specifics and mechanics?

Friendships have an "infatuation" phase where getting to know the person and spending time with them is effortless and fun and you feel like you'll never get bored of each other. Friendships often involve an expectation of emotional connection and telling each other things, making the other a part of your life to some extent. It's possible to have feelings of jealousy for a friend, especially if you suddenly become a lot less important to them in favor of a new person in their life (which in an exclusive romantic relationship might be considered a kind of "emotional cheating"). It's possible for a friendship to fail or peter out for the exact same reasons where, if it were a romantic couple getting couples therapy, their therapist would tell them "You need to reconnect by doing things together again, you need to make an effort and work at restoring your connection". Which sometimes romantic couples do, and then they stay together, but in friendships it seems to be kinda seen as normal and not imbued with the same sense of almost-tragedy? Even though it's a very comparable time and energy commitment essentially going down the drain. Finally, it's quite possible to be heartbroken that a friendship ended, and a toxic friendship can be every bit as damaging as a toxic romance. To put it in a phrase, you could take any number of posts asking for relationship advice where, if you removed monikers like "friend" or "SO/gf/bf", it would be very difficult to tell if the relationship is romantic or not.

"Romantic relationships are like friendships" is equally controversial in the sense that a lot of people don't really seem to know what to do when the infatuation wears off, partly because media and culture seem deeply uninterested in exploring this stage of romantic relationships? Or they interpret the inevitable fade of hormone-fueled excitement as falling out of love, break off the relationship, and rinse and repeat this a few times before they wisen up and learn to form long-lasting friendships with the people they fall in love with.

To wit, close friendships and romance both involve love and attachment and (some amount of) commitment. And yet we barely ever seem to talk about friendships using the language of love, even though love is unquestionably what's going on there. (Again, I'm talking about close, long-lasting friendships.)

..Or maybe my experiences are not universal and I'm just a weirdo who gets overly attached. Idk.

--

I refer to "friend breakups" and "friend dumping" all the time.

I think if you put it in those terms, most people agree: they've had some devastating end to a friendship that hurt them more than half their romantic breakups. It's just not how movies tend to describe it... at least not in words. Buddy movies are all about the idea that a friend breakup is the literal worst thing in the universe though.

I guess I roll my eyes a tad because I've witnessed decades of finger-wagging books about how we don't care enough about friendships and those are what really predict adult mental health in the long term, blah blah blah. Things like friend crushes (that honeymoon period) and devastating friend breakups are well known to psychologists and self help book writers.

Anyway, you aren't weird, and people who want to keep their long-term friends need to make time for some friend dates if they want to keep the magic going.

[bunny-hoodlum]

not tryna start fights lol. i really enjoy the descriptions of your story’s (they’re really different than most nh stories) but i hate reading unfinished works 😭 ive read wayyyy too many nh stories that end up with cliffhangers so i just wanted to know if there’s any reason why they all seem unfinished before i start getting invested

It's just an odd question to ask, is all, and you could've started your ask with this. Think about how your question came off. I had zero context behind your question and it just sounded bad. Like, most fics online are unfinished. Or they don't get updated for a long ass time. Or the writers just update when they feel like it, as opposed to most who update whenever they can.

Some people have family obligations, physical and or mental health issues.

Me? I probably have ADHD-Primarily Inattentive, I can't afford a diagnosis just yet, but I've always struggled with motivation, organizing myself, energy issues, headspace/focus issues.

Does having multiple ongoing fics seem counterintuitive? Yes, absolutely. But also, no, not at all. Because I'm having fun having multiple things to jump between.

I didn't plan to start multiple things in such a short amount of time. I participated in NHMonth2023 to the best of my ability and found out I understood how to write and thus rly enjoyed short stories, after kind of avoiding and not trying for the entirety of my fandom activity. Being in the discord has inspired most of these new ideas and instead of letting then stay ideas that I might forget about, I decided to make them a reality.

It's really all circumstantial how my Ao3 got to the way that it is. None of this planned or on purpose or all that easy to explain. Look at how long this reply has gotten already.

If you're intrigued but can't get invested, there's nothing I can do about that. If you don't like waiting for something to finish, then you don't. You already know what you like, how you want to handle your reading experience, etc.

Writing takes time. Like a lot of fucking time. When I get in a groove, it takes me all day or all week if I'm lucky. I'm more motivated to finish a chapter in single sitting than I am getting up to eat on those kinds of days, and I wish they'd happen more but I can't be neglectful like that. There's chores, there's spending time with certain people, there's my job, etc.

I actually do gotta slow my roll because my husband is feeling kinda down lately, so I'm going to try and be more available for him and work on my fics at a more casual pace.

Maybe by the end of the year you'll be able to finally read a handful of my new short stories, cuz lord knows when I'll get around to completing my slowburns and doing them justice. 😅

But yeah, just don't read them if you only read completed works? What am I supposed to do about that? 😂 Check in again in a year, see if there's any completed works. That's rly all you can do.

[annoyingblondebracket]

Round 1 | Poll 1

~ Note: This poll is being done out of a genuine love and affection for these types of characters! Please keep that in mind when adding commentary. Propaganda under the cut!

Tsukasa Tenma:

~ hes very loud and eccentric and multiple characters say he is annoying

~ He's an extremely loud theater kid who wants to be a world famous star. Anytime he's on screen he'll yell very loudly at least once. Most other characters have an 'oh... it's him.." moment whenever they see him. Others try (and fail) to avoid him so they don't get caught in his antics. He's a loser and the fandom loves him for it.

~ he's a theater kid who is 100% determined to become the Number 1 World Future Star!!! with absolutely zero volume control who is constantly screaming and laughing at the top of his lungs, to the point where you can hear him from pretty much anywhere in the school. several of his friends (who still love him) and random background characters talk about finding him annoying and intrusive at several points in the story. he's a genuinely really sweet guy who is mainly just putting up a front to hide his insecurities but also the man is constantly reciting a mantra that's just him telling you what his name means. also one time he tried to comfort a crying kid at a theme park by screaming his name at her in english (which he does not speak) and just wound up making her cry harder which tells you pretty much all you need to know

~ He is canonically so loud, like helicopter blades whirling levels of loud. He does not know when to shut up, and is just all around, annoying!!

~ generally very loud, overconfident, little self awareness of how silly he is. consistently found annoying by some characters (ie akito, nene, shiho) and can overwhelm others with his intensity at times

~ he is a very loud and slightly obnoxious theatre kid!! although he is a good person deep down, he's constantly bragging about becoming the world's greatest star. one of his close friends, kamishiro rui (not blonde), makes a lot of drones and robots and often brings them to school, causing quite a bit of chaos that tsukasa inevitably gets roped into. the two of them are referred to as the "weirdo wombo combo" (among other names, depending on the translation) and are found particularly annoying by the character shinonome akito, who mostly tolerates him just because they have a close mutual friend. outside of school, tsukasa works part time as a performer in a theme park, along with characters otori emu, kusanagi nene, and the aforementioned kamishiro rui. nene finds his antics very annoying, and regularly wears noise-canceling headphones just to drown out his voice. she also makes fun of him a lot, but it's all in good fun; they're actually very good friends. tsukasa can sometimes be annoyingly overprotective over his younger sister, saki, mostly because she has had health issues all her life and spent years in and out of the hospital. so although he means well, even she finds him annoying on occasion. not to mention he talks to himself, rehearses monologues, and paces around his room quite a lot. i love the guy but i'd hate to live in the same house as him too. most of this can be summed up by saying that he just gives off immense amounts of theatre kid energy, and if you've ever known a theatre kid during tech week or right after a show, you get somewhat of an idea of what tsukasa's peers have to deal with on a regular basis. and i love him dearly

~ He’s so loud and boisterous and cocky and dramatic that a decent chunk of the other characters actively describe him as annoying or loud. He’s a really good guy, he really is, he’s a great big brother and a nice dude, but unless you’re on his wavelength or a compatible wavelength, he’s completely fucking insufferable.

~ He is LOUD. SO VERY LOUD. The entire school he goes to knows who he is (maybe not by name, but as that-one-guy-who-never-stops-screaming) and will roll their eyes when they see him approach. He's a theater kid also if that wasn't bad enough. And stupid as hell. Ridiculous. I love him so much

~ He's extremely confident and almost always posing and/or screaming. Characters frequently comment on how loud or over the top he is and several characters make a point to try to avoid him when they see him out in public.

~ he's a loud, exuberant, overdramatic theater kid!!! 90% of the time he is shouting and loves to just strike poses whenever he can! tends to overreact and many many characters regard him as loud and annoying but he also has a really big heart and cares a lot about his loved ones and he also expresses that fact very VERY loudly. he's so STUPID (affectionate)

Sanji:

~ Fucking malewife. Horrid little man.

~ He simps so hard for literally every single women

~ everything about him [ is annoying ] pretty much (endearing)

~ be normal about women for once in your life king please

~ he swoons over every woman he sees and it annoys everyone around him (he is very stupid and i love him)

~ Creepy abt women

~ Obsessed with women to an insane level; he'd do anything for women including getting in their bed first because he "thought they didn't want to be alone"; also he's a better cook than me

[maspers]

Ranking the Miracucast by how willing they are to attempt bingewatching the entirety of One Piece in one sitting.

(Disclaimer do not actually attempt this unless you have zero regard for your health)

Marinette: She wanted to when she heard Adrien was going to be there. So she's willing. But she just doesn't have the TIME. Between school and heroics and helping out at the shop and commissions and literally everything else ever, watching One Piece in one go doesn't have a chance of ever happening. 3/10

Alya: She and Nino are the ones who set up the bingewatch party, but a reporter's work is never done so she just kind of has it on in the background while she works on her latest post. It's on continuously, but she's definitely not there for all of it. 5/10

Adrien: Yes. 10/10

Nino: See Alya, except he actually tries to watch it because he wants to ensure all his friends are having a good time. Of course, the group lasted about a day before they gave up, but the attempt was there. 6/10

Chloe: Two options: she thinks the whole idea is ridiculous and isn't watching (0/10) OR she thinks the whole idea is ridiculous but also wanted to join Adrien. She makes the mistake of watching a few episodes and now she's INVESTED (8/10). Could go either way. 4/10 on average.

Sabrina: This girl watches so much anime in her downtime. Look at her. You know it's true. She would never tell Chloe, but after the great Boss/Minion Breakup of Season 5 Sabrina has all the time in the world and she is using it to watch One Piece. 8/10

Mylene: Thinks the show is charming but not all that interesting to her. But can bingewatch it with Ivan and cuddle up against his giant teddy bear body while basically ignoring the show and that's fine with her. 4/10

Ivan, Rose, Juleka, and Luka: Kitty Section as a whole loves this show to bits and when they all realized they had a two-week vacation they knew what they would be doing. Anarka basically had to host a One Piece summer camp on the Liberty for the six of them (including Adrien as part of the band, and Mylene as Ivan's +1), and they slept in shifts to ensure that they didn't have to stop the show. It was a whole fiasco. They will never do anything like this ever again. They returned to school tired and sore and in agonizing pain. Luka's hands are in excruciating pain because he just HAD to play along with the sheer emotion of the show, Ivan accidentally passed out and crushed his desk, and Adrien's modeling shoots had to be postponed until he could fix his posture after sitting so long. Even Juleka looked tired, and she never looks tired. Mylene was fine because she basically slept though most of it, but Rose is somehow still bursting with energy. "We should do that again sometime! That was really fun!" Cue a chorus of groans. 11/10

Kim: I'm not sure if Kim knows what anime is. Like, I want to say he knows, but at the same time, does he really? I genuinely have no clue. Can someone please help me here? The mind of Kim is a mind I don't think anyone can truly decipher. ?/10

Max: He has done the math. He knows how long it would take. He's not suicidal. But he does like the show, and will make token appearances at his friends' watch parties. 2/10

Alix: Sorry Alix, this is not a situation you can cheat your way through using time travel. No, Alix, having each episode open on a different viewing port playing simultaneously does not count. No points for you. -Alix/10

Nathaniel: Tried to get Marc to do it. Marc thankfully talked him out of it. Nath still dreams of doing it one day. 4/10, potential to eventually reach 9/10 if he can wear Marc down.

Lila: Says she's done it. But the entirety of Kitty Section knows she's lying. That kind of thing leaves a mark on people. 0/10

Kagami: Adrien told her where he learned most of his Japanese vocabulary from and she just facepalmed. And then sat down to watch it with him. She'd definitely not watching all of it, but she'll enjoy some in her free time? 5/10

Marc: He can see the hunger in Nathaniel's eyes. He can feel it emanating. The One Piece fan in Nath wants to come out and stay out. Marc will not let it. He will hold the line. He will never give up, never surrender. But he can feel the power, clawing at his brain. The secret feelings, deep down. "Don't you want to see if you COULD do it?" He shoves those thoughts deeper. Nathaniel can never know. Must never know. Because then the battle will be lost. 1/10

Ondine: Actually knows what anime is, and probably has the physical fortitude to make it through a One Piece marathon with minimal physical backlash. Unfortunately her actually doing that would be dependent on Kim (see above) so I hope you understand why this ranking isn't a certain as I would like. 7/10

Aurore: Not on your life. 0/10

Felix: He would never marathon the whole thing himself, but he did provide Adrien and the rest of Kitty Section with their sleep schedule for their marathon. 2/10

Zoe: She has dreamed of marathoning an anime her entire life, and now she has friends to marathon anime with! But she's not doing One Piece. That would be an absolute nightmare, only insane people try to marathon all of One Piece. Instead she has Plans. One Piece is cool tho. 4/10

[dogloveri23]

I have a request hehe. I got the idea while I'm having a body ache lol.

Can you make a fluff moment either Zhongli or Cyno taking care of S/O who always have body ache, and sometime have zero energy to do anything. Sometime they can't even do anything because too tired and ache so hard.

Hope you read this^^

Care

pairing: Zhongli x reader

A/n: so due to school work I haven't had time to play genshin as frequently. I haven't really understood cyno, which is why I chose to write for zhongli. I also get the sense this wasn't what you were going for but im still trash at writing fluff. Please bear with me!Also hope you're feeling better @starrygalaxysworld

Written by @dogloveri23

UID: 627473190

"Ugh", you grunted as your muscles ached again. The pain was a harsh reminder of the adventure you had returned from. Just last week you were running through the forest with Dehya and the traveller having a fun time and now you couldn't move without having tears stream down your face. Just trying to get up from the bed was proving to be an issue. You lay on your back, staring blankly at the ceiling letting out a soft sigh, silently cursing the Ruin drake for catching you off guard.

You take a deep and clench your teeth forcing yourself to sit up and rest your back on the bed frame.

The sound of the busy streets of Liyue could be heard along with the chirping of birds and the crashing of the gentle waves. The golden rays of sunlight broke into your room. Usually, you'd get up to look at the scenery, but you didn't want to. The thought of the pain that would follow was discouraging enough. If not for Zhongli bringing you food, you'd prefer to starve to death than get up and cook something. You closed your eyes briefly as you relax, enjoying the atmosphere.

The door creaked open and the sound of footsteps followed causing you to open your eyes. "My love, are you ok?", a familiar voice asked causing you to take a deep breath. You endured the pain as you slowly turned your head to face him. Zhongli had gotten his answer just from looking at you. "It appears your situation hasn't gotten that much better", Zhongli said as he walked to the bed. He gently placed his hand on yours and leaned over, placing a kiss on your forehead. "It still hurts like hell", You say, pain evident in your voice as you look at him. "Perhaps, I should try a different type of tea today. I should have a recipe to help with aching and help you recover strength", Zhongli said as he gently ran over your cheek with his thumb.

Zhongli had tried different tea recipes to help you get better but to no avail. It was odd, unlike the archon was used to. His only comfort was that body ache was the only issue and you seemed to be in good health. "It seems we may have to cancel our walk to the harbour", You said sadly as you couldn't see yourself going on any date outside of the four walls of your bedroom. " I see, it seems I should change our plans to something indoors", Zhongli said as he slowly withdrew his hand from your cheek and placed it on his chin.

As Zhongli pondered, the room grew silent only being filled with the sounds of the outside world. What could the two of you do together that wouldn't cause too much stress on you and didn't require movement on your end? The both of you sat in silence and for a few minutes, there was no answer. As much as you loved him, you had no intention of doing anything today. You closed your eyes briefly and relaxed, not noticing his gold eyes studying your movements.

You hummed to yourself softly before feeling the bed dip. You felt Zhongli manoeuvre you from where you were to a new position. Your back laid on his chest as his soft breaths tickled your face. Neither of you spoke but you knew that this was the best decision. Resting in each others' arms enjoying the silent company.

[absolutely-normal-about-x]

Okay so might delve into some ideas but the more I think about it Volnutt would have the potential to possess the variable weapon system. Or a Carbon equivalent of it.

The guardians would have their own but personally it’s more of their techniques and adaptations. Rather than directly copying it from someone else.

What I’m getting at is that unlike them Volnutt got it DIRECTLY from X, since he was created with his data so there’s a decent chance that some of X’s more unorthodox abilities might of been passed on to Volnutt unknowingly. Since this is an era of “Halcyon” and not ya know intense battles and shit. Volnutt wouldn’t have to be aware of it, hell even Trigger has no idea about since that knowledge was lost or everyone assumed it’s something that only X himself can do (Aside from Axl and Zero aldheurbwudb).

But unlike how X deals with his Variable weapon system, since Carbons are “Organic” and no light capsules around. It’s probably possible that it’s more likely “Genetic” that unlike his gear that he requires to equip, he can use it at Will and can be implemented into all of his gear but there’s kinda a problem. It would take a toll on his health, as these special weapons have limited uses before finding an energy thang to recharge it.

For Volnutt, his “Variable” Gene might be applied but more limited uses but fuck do they pack A PUNCH. In terms of his appearance would change slightly depending on the ability

It’s more limited to him but I imagine they work as how divine beast/Sage powers worked in Zelda. But they’re would be special equipment designed to use these abilities safer and not draining. He can use them independently but it takes a toll if he’s not used to it. But that doesn’t mean he can be taught how to use them safely with guidance.

What I’m getting it at that wouldn’t be so fucking funny that Volnutt discovers it by accident during a sparring session with Fefnir…that he surprised punched Fef on the face making direct contact with his gem and accidentally Installing it.

Next thing he knew his arm is burnt, he feels that he’s literally on fire…WHY IS EVERYTHING IS ON FIRE.

Meaning Fen is just.

“DAMN LIL GUY SINCE WHEN YOU CAN USE MY SKILL LIKE THAT!?”

“I DONT KNOW!? AND OW THAT HURTS!?”

“DONT KNOW, DONT CARE THAT WAS GREAT- Also we might get that treated cause I’m pretty sure that Harpy, Pops or anyone are going to kill me….”

[whumpberry-cookie]

Sugar rush prompts!

For Candy anon!

(Cw: slight mention of bodily waste, starvation whump)

A group of characters are having a fun side-episode of enjoying themselves in the theme park. The leader/oldest in the group tells them to take everything they want. It's on the leader today. Ice cream. Then hot dogs. Then cotton candies. Than mini melts. Jellies. Lollipops. Sweet potato fries. At the end of the day one character burfed twice on roller coasters. The second has tummy ache and promises themselves to never eat anything sweet again. The third one used all their sugar rush energy and is almost asleep, complaining that their legs hurt from walking. The fourth is in their sugar rush and jumps all over the place like a spring. The fifth is holding down the fourth, so they don't run away and get lost. The sixth still keeps eating leftover caramell fudge. And the leader has no money left.

Whumpee knows too much sweets is bad for their health. (Maybe they're recovering after some stomach surgery). Or they just have to avoid sugar rushes. But they have a hard time refusing themselves anything sweet, even adding sugar to their tea, what was a long time habit. Caretaker prepares them meals that taste sweet but don't irritate their stomach (soda substitute with zero sugar, safe sweeteners, sugar free fruit kissels, homemade puddings on milk and potato starch only)

Whumpee is in their recovery after escaping from Whumper who used to give them only the necessary amount of tasteless food. When Caretaker tells them to eat as much of homemade cookies as they want, Whumpee keeps eating, crying. They ignore the feeling of satiety and stomachache. They are so soo happy. But sadly the sugar makes them energized. They get anxious and can't sleep because of vivid nightmares. Caretaker keeps them company and watches a movie with them, preparing salty snacks this time.

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Thank you for waiting, Candy Anon! If you're still there? It took me a while to think of some new ideas, but I hope you enjoyed those!