#Hes british and smelly and gay

[gallonsoblood]

Day 102939147 of drawing ocs Kyle doesnt even sound like a word anymore someone help me

[shelaghdette]

ctm s13e06 thoughts (spoilery, sweary, sleep deprived, scottish)

actual pisstake. frothing at the mouth. rabid. feral. unhinged. not being normal.

first of all, the episode.

matthew aylward is an absolutely abhorrent fiend. every single time his face showed up on the screen, me & my pals on the discord server were POURING abuse into the chat. callin this man the worstest names in the world. truly the minginest bloke ive ever seen. imagine shouting at my best pal trixie franklin (who is your beautiful gorjiss wife) just because she tried to help solve a problem YOU created. DIAF matthew aylward.

AND NOW APPARENTLY NONNATUS HOUSE ISN'T SAFE FROM CLOSURE BECAUSE TRASHTHEWS STUPID ARSE IS LOSING ALL HIS MONEY?? TAKING THE PEE EYE DOUBLE ESS ON THAT ONE MATE. NOT HAPPY. THE YOUNG LASSIES (WHO ARE PROBABLY ABOUT THE SAME AGE AS ME) HAVE ONLY JUST GOT THEIR PERMANENT JOABS AND NOW NONNATUS COULD BE CLOSING??? LIFE RUINING

speaking of new faces, love aw the wee pupil midwives passing their exams!! so excited to see wee rosalind and wee joyce as permanent staff at nonnatus!!!

speaking of the pupils, THEY ARE TRYING TO SET UP A ROSALIND/CYRIL ROMANCE STORYLINE AND IM NOT HERE FOR IT. ROSALIND CLIFFORD IS QUITE OBVIOUSLY A BABYGAY AND SHES IN LOVE WITH JOYCE HIGHLAND. STOP MAKING PEOPLE STRAIGHT HEIDI. BE BRAVE AND BOLD AND CATER TO THE SAPPHICS HEIDI. WE HAVEN'T HAD CANON LESBOS SINCE PUPCAKE HEIDI. WE ARE STARVING AND MALNOURISHED HEIDI.

speaking of cyril tho, he's an absolute legend and was serving so much cunt this episode. 100% lad. love how nice he was to the poor irish wummin & her barins.

also doctor turner talking about his old arthritic knees like he doesn't know what a temptation that is for me as a recovering dilf addict. scrum diddly umptious. i had to go and have a lie down and a valium after that blatant and violent assault on my mental health.

speaking of scrum diddly umptious and the turners, costume designer putting shelagh turner in lesbian flag colours THE ENTIRE EPISODE and teasing all the gay lassies who have taste? cruel and unusual punishment. i fancy her so much. at least it was acknowledged how bonny she was in this one (and every one) (cheers sister v you queen)

speaking of the turners also, it's fabulous to see all of my stepchildren safe and well, especially my best and favourite wee lassie may <3 i know we're probably coming up for some pretty harrowing stories about her, so it was awfy gid to see thon wee smile for a moment.

finally: loved seeing sheelz in her element on the old johanna whacking oot the jesus bangers wi the local weans SING HOSANNA SING HOSANNA SING HOSANNA TO THE KING OF KINGS!! GIVE ME OIL IN MY LAMP KEEP IT BURNING 🔥 🕺🏼💃👯‍♂️

fuckall but slay.

not about this episode but my very final thought: WHAT THE ACTUAL SHITTING FUCK DO YOU MEAN WE'RE NOT GETTING CTM NEXT WEEK BECAUSE OF THE BAFTAS. WHO GIVES A RATS SMELLY ARSE ABOUT THE BRITISH ACADEMY FILM AND TELEVISION AWARDS. WHO EVEN WATCHES THEM. EVERYBODY LOVES CTM. LITERALLY EVERYONE IN THE WORLD. I DON'T KNOW ANYONE WHO EVEN KENS WHIT THE BAFTAS ARE AW ABOOT.

god bless my ctm luvvas. catch yis aw in a fortnight. big kissies to all (especially my wifey sheely turny)

[decent0distraction]

Our Flag Means Death AU where everything is the same except Nigel is actually crushing on Stede pretty hard and he genuinely cares about him so he joins the crew and AHHHHH-

-Ahem. Sorry. Let’s break it down.

SO, we have Nigel, whose crew spots the Revenge, “EyE!”, but pauses. Because

that can’t be him, can it? Stede Bonnet? Were the rumors really true? This can’t be the same sweet, good person Nigel knew when he was young, can it? A pirate captain? No. Stede Bonnet couldn’t possibly have become something that Nigel is supposed to destroy.

Still, he looks…nice. That color is a good color on him - a nice color. In fact, Nigel woke that morning entirely sure that he despised such a color, but now, he isn’t sure of anything.

So screw the crew, we’re goin’ over there. Why? Don’t ask questions, Bob. Just for that, Bob, you get to stay behind on our stupid, smelly ship in this job that I’m pretty sure was a mistake so yeah, Bob, fuck you-

-Anyway, they go over there. Stede panics like in canon and while the rest of the Navy ship crew are just kind of like “okay??”, Nigel sees right through them.

And yet, he finds it endearing. He needs to get Stede alone, to apologize and address the rumors without raising cause for concern amongst the other officers.

So he requests a tour and a little banter jumps across the table between the two captains.

“A tour,” Stede repeats questioningly. Why would he care about a tour?

“Yes,” Nigel confirms with a smile. “A tour. It is an activity in which two people may do together. It involves walking around the property of which one person owns, with the intent to show the other person what that property entails.”

“Intent, you say,” Stede quirks, a small smile tugging at one corner of his mouth.

Nigel could almost laugh. Did he just see the beginnings of a smirk? “Don’t be cheeky now. Give us a look.”

And Stede, ever the gentleman, agrees.

The entire time by the way, the two crews are looking at each like “what the actual flying fuck are these two talking about??” and “aw, they’re gay.” I’ll leave the matter of which crew is thinking what to the masses.

Also, as Nigel leaves, he stops to barely glance at his crew. “Behave yourselves,” he growls, knowing better. (This, unfortunately, changes nothing, but we’ll get to that later)

In Stede’s room, Nigel is speechless for once in his life.

There’s something so… Stede about this room. The curtains, the books, the hidden compartments. It’s lovely and unique, just like him.

Instead of making fun of Stede, Nigel brings up the matter of rumors with serious concerns.

Did something happen? Was Stede threatened? Or was he just unhappy?

They have a real conversation, which Nigel interrupts to apologize for he treated Stede when they were children. He explains that he was running from something inside himself and he just happened to keep running into Stede. Not that he meant that as an excuse. Of course not. He would never-

-Stede stops him, touching his arm. Nigel feels as though he could be stabbed through the eye and fall into instant death and still feel this warm.

The moment is ruined, however, by shouting. Nigel immediately moves to protect Stede, who sighs and returns to the crew like an exhausted parent.

Nigel is mortified at the behavior of his crew and sends them back to the ship like children.

However, two brave foolish officers try to attack Stede and are immediately knocked out with two swift hits from their captain.

They get the fuck out of there, of course, because Nigel literally just betrayed the British Navy?? Like girl, me too but calm down.

And somewhere between fleeing and accidentally running the ship aground, Nigel asks Stede if he can join the crew and fight at his side.

And Stede laughs. He laughs and Nigel feels cold. He feels as though he might freeze to death. Surely, he deserves it. He’s a fool for thinking someone as wonderful as Stede Bonnet would ever grace someone like himself with sunshine.

“Oh, Nigel,” Stede sighs. “I thought you already had.”

And off they go.

BONUS!!

Nigel being there when Izzy, Fang, and Ivan meet them in the forest. Nigel and Izzy having a little sword fight and Nigel COMPLIMENTING Izzy because his skills match (nay, best, but who’s gonna admit to that) that of British Navy officer’s?? Nigel sulking about it later on and Stede trying to reassure him that he is “very good at swords” which is somehow worse then just nearly getting beaten??

[rodolfoparras]

Trevors shirt covers him up like just enough so they don't have to constantly like censor his dick😭 the ghosts are pretty used to it by now and don't care, as long as he doesn't raise his arms which causes the shirt go lift up😭😭

Xnsnznns💀 the way I knew you'd like Thor, big dumb hairy man that is smelly🙄 I'm not big into piss or sweat personally (I'm sensitive lil baby and will possibly vomit at certain smells😭) but I will admit that man is so fine😋

I can't say for certain, I've only just finished season one of the show but Thor has spoken a norse language in one episode I believe? I couldn't really say anything more specific than that😭💔

!!! Isaac is gay🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥 him and the British solider are the biggest homos ever🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥 Isaac was closeted but like... It was made of glass... The doors were wide open... Bro was only fooling himself and Hetty somehow😭 bro was sharing a room with Hetty and he goes up to the other ghosts like "oh I bet you're all wondering if yk me and Hetty😏" and they just stare at him😭😭😭 like they definitely did not think you were hooking up with a woman Isaac you can't stop being horny for MEN🔥

I really have no idea why the did different versions, I guess to maybe update it a little or make it more relatable in the US??? Really can't say, just happy that it exists because these characters are yummy😋😋😋

Also I'm making a silly oc for Ghosts!!! He's a goofy little jester, died like right after a carnival nearby the woodstone manor, as he was dying stumbled off onto the property and became a ghost with the others😼 he died with a bunch of shit in his sleeves from all his tricks and he's actually able to share his stuff with the other Ghosts as like a "ghost power"

Sasappis is so heartbroken that oc did not die with pizza somehow shoved up his sleeve😔💔 truly tragic. oc is like the type to observe everything, everyone could be fighting and he's just sitting in the background like :0 while munching on a snack from his sleeve😭

-🌱

Well at least that’s something!!!😭 but also I can’t help but imagine how funny he must look only wearing something on his upper half 😭

He looks absolutely delicious!!! I’ll happily piss on him upon request it could be for healing purposes or just for the fun of it I really don’t mind ☺️

I’ll def have to check it out then partially to hear him speak and partially to ogle at him 🏃🏻‍♂️

Isaac sounds like the silliest ghost to exist I absolutely adore it😭 also i love the comedic elements of this show like I’ve genuinely not heard of anything similar 😭

Well that does make sense!! I rmr skam making different versions in different countries and they’d adapt it so it would be suitable in a French society or wherever else it got released

Also not the poor jester dying with a bunch of stuff in his sleeve 😭 I’m imagining him constantly pulling stuff out of it especially at inappropriate times and the rest are just like not now 😭

Tbh I can understand sasappis poor ghost just wanted a delicious meal after being dead for so long 😔 also i absolutely love that!!! Does he have a hat with little bells on? Bc if so im imagining him watching a scene head whipping side to side and you hear the little bell sounds every time 😭

[animation-recaps-by-sean]

Gravity Falls Beyond the Woods Chapter 13

Rose avoids thinking about the danger she and her family are in, while Powers makes his move against Dipper.

<- prev next->

It was past 3 a. m. when Stan and Ford rode in. Dipper saw the cars ride in before his phone lit up from Ford's text. Mabel must have noticed too as they were already in the hallway in their robes. When they reached the lobby, Stan and Ford were walking through the entrance. Thompson and Robbie were there too, in full uniform. 

"Oh, Grunkle Stan! This is terrible!" Mabel cried as she threw herself in his arms. 

Ford greeted the others. "Dipper, Wendy, Pacifica. Ah officers I guess." 

"Dr. Pines, Deputy Valentino. I think you'll recognize me from weirdmaggedon." 

Ford adjusted his glasses. "Robbie, was it?"

"Robert." 

"Yes, yes. Good to see you again Robbie," Ford said absentmindedly, patting him on the shoulder.  He turned Dipper. “Any pictures of the object in question?” 

Dipper handed him his phone. "I'm having trouble placing it." As Ford flipped through the gallery Dipper continued. "We were contacted by something claiming to be the fairy Puck. So I've been combining everything Celtic, Welsh, British and anything really. But I haven't seen anything like it yet." 

The frown Ford was wearing deepened. “I’ve never been able to study fairy’s in any meaningful way. They were hard to catch and the gnomes and unicorns did not like talking about them. And I know nothing about Puck, save for Shakespeare's Midsummer Night's Dream." He turned to Wendy. "Did your mother speak on anything about this object? Where she got it?" 

Wendy shook her head. "Nothing to me. Nothing to dad." 

Ford thought for a moment. "I'll talk with him myself later. But first, maybe we might find something at the library. If she got it in town, there is a chance we'll find something there.” 

Pacifica, who had been pacing this whole time, spoke up. "Well then let's hurry. My kids are in danger! Who knows what's happening to them."

What was happening to them was that they needed baths. With the fights against the machines, the kidnapping, everyone was getting smelly. So when the kids came to an open spring, they decided to wash up a little. They bent down and washed their arms and faces. Ashley helped Stanley get clean. Ty thought it would be a good time to talk to his sister. 

“You really think this is a good idea?” 

As Rose washed her arms, her hands bumped into the bracelet. “Look, this is our chance to find something about grandma. And those robot things are jerks. Stopping this homunculus guy is a good thing.” 

“Rose, we do not know anything about fighting robots. Dad didn’t fight robots.” 

“He fought a bunch. GIFfney controlled those animatronics, heck, he fought the same ones we fought, well the same ones I fought." 

"But didn't Grunkle Ford…"

"Look, I'm working on it. I know you're worried but I got it!"

Whatever retort he had died on his lips as Josh took off his shirt. Josh jumped in the spring. 

Ashley raised her arms as the water splashed into her. “Watch it!” 

"Sorry," he mumbled meekly as he pushed his wet hair out of his face. As Tyrone watched, a lump form in his throat. Josh rose up, his body wet from the spring; water dripping from his bare chest. Smiling he asked, "Anybody else needs a drip? Tyrone, you look like you could use one."

Ty's face was as red as a fire hydrant. "I'm good," he said in a squeak that would have made his dad proud. 

Rose inwardly laughed. Admittedly, she wasn't much better with boys. Okay she was much worse. But since Josh was gay, there was nothing she could screw up cause it was never gonna happen. So how hot he was didn’t matter. It was fun seeing her brother squirm for once. 

"You know what Josh? I think I'll take a dip too." She jumped in, still fully dressed. And for a brief moment, her fights with her mom, her father's legacy, and the danger she put everyone in washed away under the water. 

The Agency had set up shop in a motel. Tambry sat at a desk, holding a pair of headphones in her ear, writing on a piece of paper with her free hand. Powers still didn't trust her. She set down the headphones. “Alright, they’re making their way to the library. This is our best chance to take Dipper Pines away from prying eyes.” 

“Can we trust this-this Homunculus thing?” 

“Do we have a choice?” 

He had nothing to say to that. Tambry slipped on her jacket and grabbed her helmet. “They’d recognize my voice. Powers, you’ll have to take point.” 

“Look, I understand you need to have to disguise, but could you wear something less stupid?” 

Tambry hit his arm with her helmet before putting it on. “Okay, let’s go.” 

The library was closed of course. The old build was shut down for the night. They had gone to pick up Soos to help. Melody stayed behind with their daughter. 

Soos went up to the clearly locked door and to his, and only his surprise. He failed to open it. He started pushing the damn thing with all his might.

Robert fumbled for his phone. "I'll see if we can get a janitor or something." 

Dipper had already pulled out the president's key that Quinton Trembrly gave him. It was a master key for every lock in town. At least for ones built in the 19th century. 

As he opened the door he said, "You know I never got a chance to use this as much as I thought I would."

They went inside and began digging through any book about Gravity Falls' history or fairies. As Soos read, he said "I hope this isn't because I killed that fairy that one time." Ford sighed deeply. 

Soon, everyone heard rustling. Thompson and Robbie pulled out their guns. Several heavily armed men, most in swat tactical gear, a few in suits, and a lady in a motorcycle outfit complete with helmet, entered. Dipper recognized the man who looked like the leader. 

"Powers?" 

"Oh so you remember me? Petty I can't remember any of you. I came to this dung heap of a town for the biggest bust of my career. I returned to Washington not only empty handed but weeks of my life gone. I was ruined."

"Well maybe you shouldn't have tried to arrest me," Stan piped up. 

"Yeah,” Mabel nodded.  

"YOU BROKE THE LAW! OF COURSE I-" the lady in the helmet walked his arm. "Ow." Powers rubbed where she hit him. " Look, Professor Pines, please come with us. The young one." 

"Do you represent the US government?" Thompson asked, his gun armed right at Power’s head. 

The answer was yes, but they very well couldn't say that. "Come with us and your family will not get hurt." That was the worst thing he could have said. 

“If you touch any of my…” The Lady in the motorcycle helmet pulled out a dart gun and shot Dipper in his neck. 

Mabel was the first to react. "Dipper!" She lunged forward for her twin. Wendy went after the shooter. Unfortunately, she was not alone and several of her fellow agents pulled out guns that very much did not fire darts. 

Ford ran to the side, away from the girls, and pulled out his magnet gun. Pulling the trigger, he directed most of the bullets his way. Stan and Pacifica dragged Wendy and Mabel out of the line of fire. Using bookshelves for cover, Thompson and Robbie fired back as Powers did the same.

“Someone call the police,” shouted Pacifica as a hail bullets flew over their heads. 

“We’re already here!” Thompson shouted as he returned fire. 

“Competent police!” She shouted back. 

With quick reflexes, the girl in the helmet grabbed Dipper’s unconscious body and made a beeline for the exit.

"We got what we came for, fall back," Powers told everyone. He and the agents retreated. 

Filled with an intense rage, Wendy shrugged Stan off of her. She ran out and while the agents saw them load Dipper into a van. She got into her rented car and gave chase. The other agents surrounded her little car in their humvees; Wendy, being Wendy, slammed them off the road. She knew that she just lost the deposit on this thing, but she was too pissed to care. She let out a scream that was primordial as she drove closer to her target. 

“What the hell is wrong with that girl?” Powers asked as he drove. ‘Take the Money and Run’ by The Steve Millar Band was playing over the radio. 

“She’s a Corduroy,” Tambry dully told her co-worker. With Dipper drugged out, she wasn’t worried about him recognizing her voice. She pulled out a burner phone. “Homebase? This is Messenger. We have the eggs, but the chicken is after us. No, just the one. Yes, the red one. Status?” Wendy was hitting the back of the van with the rental. “Could be better. Meet us at 777845. Yes , the back. No, we’ll go through.” 

“Seriously?” 

“Yes!” 

They drove up into the Gentleman's Shame, Gravity Falls cheapest strip club. Powers and Tambry dragged Dipper out and carried him over to the entrance. 

The bouncer looked at the man in a deserved suit, a lady with her motorcycle helmet still on, an unconscious man slung over both their shoulders. 

"Uh ah, no way. You guys aren't getting in." Tambry pulled out a roll of several hundred bills. "Oh! Enjoy the show!" 

As they entered, Wendy pulled up. Opening the trunk, she pulled out an ax she grabbed from her father's place. As she was marching toward the entrance, the bouncer asked, "How much you got for me?"

Wendy hit the bottom of her ax handle into his sternum. The bouncer fell to the ground clinging to his chest.

Tambry spotted Wendy first. After swearing under her breath, she laid Dipper onto Powers. "The others are on the other side of the kitchen. Go! I'll distract her." 

The music throbbed and boom as Wendy wadded through the crowd. You would think this early in the morning, this place would be closed but no. The stages and girls dancing and grinding on poles, in various states of undress. Granted half the stages were empty but still. “I’m looking for my husband-” 

“Poor SOB,” one attendee answered. 

“No that’s not-” The lady in the motorcycle helmet ran over and kicked Wendy into the stage. Wendy saw that she was going to tackle her so she rolled onto the stage.

The stripper who was already up there was not amused. "Lady, I'm in the middle of a set!" Wendy held up her ax. "Okay, the stage is all yours." She backed away. 

The Lady in the helmet jumped up the stage and pulled out a knife. The men and several women  in the crowd started muttering among themselves. "Should someone call the police?" The lady in the helmet unzipped her jacket just enough to show off her cleavage. Thinking it some show the crowd cheered and whistled.

"You know my vice principal always told me I was gonna end up on this stage." She got into a battle ready position. "I don't think this is what he had in mind." 

A new song started. Baby, I wanna touch you, I wanna breathe into your will. Wendy brought the butt of her ax down onto her opponent. To Wendy’s surprise, she blocked her blow with the blade of the knife. She stumbled back, ready for another attempt. See, I gotta hunt you, I gotta bring you to my hell. Wendy swept at her feet, but the lady in the motorcycle helmet jumped out of the way. Boy, I'm gonna love you, I'm gonna tear into your soul. Wendy took the handle of her ax and smashed it into her helmet. How do you want me, how do you want me? She got a hit in, but at a cost. The lady in the motorcycle helmet brought her knife down onto Wendy. The redhead moved so the slash wasn’t deep, but her forearm was hit. 

Seeing actual blood clued in the audience that this wasn’t a show. Wendy held her bleeding arm as the crowd panicked. Several people went to check to see if she as alright. “I’m fine. I’m fine. Thank you.” Wendy waved them off. She looked around but her opponent had slipped away. Taking any leads of Dipper’s location with her. 

[nityarawal]

10/20/22

Molly Or Murder?

Morning Songs

Molly Or Murder?

What Do You Choose?

It's A Daily

Passion Test

Socratic Reflections!

Why'd You Kill Adrien

And Not His Dad?

Who Was The Real

Pedophile,

It Was Said!

Why Do You Go By

Dennis Sketchley?

When You're A

Campbell Spy

Working For Nazi Militia?

Why You Draw

Me "Swastikas?"

Don't You Know

They're Against My Laws?

I'm Mostly Vegetarian,

Feel A Cannibalism 

Vibe From You!

You Don't Want To 

Love Us!

Your Vibe

Is Mommy Hatin',

Killin'

My Ladies!

Your Mommy

Broker Debbie

Sketchley Can't 

Save You Now…

She was Wrong- 

I Will Never Sleep 

With You!

Because You're

A Murderer &

Who Wants Carbon Footprint

Karma To Shake 

Of A Nazi?

Broker Debbie

Pimped You

Out To Militia

To Murder Idyllwild

Town!

Retired Broker,

Hiring Lap Dancers

And teaching You

Wrong!

That's Not What My Uncles

Need,

Or Want!

No More Brokers

Taking Bribes! And

Givin' Pleas For

Domestic Terrorism,

In Our Streets!

You Sold Molly

To A Marine Uncle!

Her Stepmother,

Auntie Murdered!

With Cancer!

You Said Your Brother

Was On Tinder,

Buying Sexual Favors

Before She Was Even 

Dead!

Poor Molly- Now

13 Years Old- Had

To Witness All Of This!

She's More Like A

Niece To Me, Than

Don- For #ICareAlot

About Her Wellbeing,

And Health!

I Want To Hold Her

Hand And Make Sure

She's Protected!

Help Her Knit

When She Re-Unites

With Her Mother!

You Apologise

For All Scams

You Did!

Molly's Mom Was Slandered,

Trafficked On Meth,

Slummed Out Of

Homes!

She Has No Teeth Left To

Show- For Your Smear

Campaign,

Grooming Your

Children To Be 

Abused By Courts,

Dr. Gardner

Method!

Rapes!

I Don't Want To Hold Her 

Hand,

For An Abortion!

I want to Take it

Now,

And leave

Those Nazis!

No More Bribes For

Your #PrinceOfPegging

Nelson Mother!

Or Your Stepfather!

Don Sketchley- How

Was Your Marine Brother

Named After Don?

Seems Duplicitous 

Campbell Lost His

Children,

Dr Rawals Stepdad 

Keith Stewart Campbell

British Monster,

Took Mine!

Now, Marina Batham

Coldwell Banker Broker,

Maritime Brit Abroad,

"Headhunted" My Brother

Like A Gigolette,

From Findhorn

With Fake Tits!

Pretty Daughter's,

Needed Math Tutoring!

Was Seaberry Academy Grooming

Them Like Idyllwild Realty? 

Shane Stewart's Kids

At Idyllwild Academy

Beg For Help!

Called Crazy- Date Raped

By Therapist Tima Ivanova

For Telling Truth!

Atty Ken Carlsson Won't

Help Us Get Real

Estate Contracts, Or

Save Our Homes

In Genocide-

Re-Construct!

Scared! 

Jewish! Of

Nazi King Henry

Shane Stewart!

Dennis Has Gout,

Probably Cancer,

And Tequilla Worms

Growing And Spreading

Disease,

In A Militia "Oathkeeper"

Army!

Skin Oozing Amma

Smelly Pus

And Toxins!

He Meets His 

Proud Boys Clan

Every 3 years

Planned Jan. 6

Insurrection

Marshall Law

With #Trumpleberry

"OLD MAN TRUMP"

From A Hundred

Years Ago!

On Murder Row,

Hiding!

No More Silencing.org

You're Not A Lord

Anymore!

You Lost Your Campbell

Rights!

And Name,

Raping Moms,

Pimpin' Children,

Murdering Dads-

In Name Of Nazism!

Your Truck Was There,

All Night Long!

On Country Club

You Tried To Come

Into My Home!

Snow And Landlord

Are My Alibis!

We Heard You

Yell, " Getting Out Of here!"

Truck Door Slam!

Before You

Went To Party

Celebratin'

At Pete's

With Murderers Militia!

You Trafficked Jessica,

And All Country Club

Moms With Shane 

Stewart;

Coldwell Banker

Sotheby's

Homesmart Realty

Mom, Broker

Debbie Sketchley!

How Many Are

Unlicensed

Harassed?

You All Shall Pay

Me $5000 a Week

To My Charities

For Your Son's

Murders And Pleas!

No More Gag Orders!

I'm Whistleblowin'

On Him!

Dennis Beat Me,

And Stole My

Furniture, Art,

Time With Kids,

And Girlfriends!

Dennis Rolled Jyoti's

Car Tire Down The

Hill, And Threatens

To Throw Her From

A Hundred Stairs!

Alex And Eric Saw

My Bloodied Knees!

At Idyllwild

Mountain Liquor

After What Dennis Did

To Me!

His "Scenic" House

Is But A Detention 

Center, Armed With 

Guns, Windows

Boarded/ Curtained!

Jyoti Goes Back

For Her Cat,

To Shower,

For Food- Not Him!

She Claims To Have

Blue Ovaries,

From Tortures

Gay Militia put Her

Through!

A Tickbite In Bed

Dustin Must've Planted!

Dennis's Dr. And Him

Butchered Me Too!

Now I Have A White Scar

Over My Heart!

You Stole Our Wallets,

Jeans And Underpants

So Nicky Would

Suck Your Dick!

You Raided My Homes With

Dustin- pseodonamed- For

Alex Grover!

Gay Sheriff Jeremy Parsons

"Cleaning Up Roads!" 

Raping Moms!

With Shane Stewart Militia!

I Need It All Back!

Tell Atty Ken Carlsson,

He's Lucky You Didn't 

Kill Him!

For I Defended All

The Jews- Your Neighbor

Larry! And Carmel

Benson Too! 

She's Ruined Idyology,

In Name And Form Politically,

I Know You Said

You wanted to "F" Her

Over-And I Couldn't

Let That!

No I Polished Her

Silver- Served Food

Ken Carlsson Ate

From- Every Night

To Make Sure

I Had An Alibi!

She'd Never Let Me

Pay Him!

Not At Work,

Or Help On His

Estrangement Website,

With Credit Card,

For She Was Bribed,

For Sure!

Everyone Hates Her!

Hospitality Sucked,

They Were Hurt

By Her Drunk

Words!

And Violence To

Underage Staff!

You Don't Call A

Child A "Bitch!"

'Cuz You're In A Bad

Mood Or Take Bribes

From The Courts!

Officers Raping Employees,

Waiters,

Instead Of Driving Them

To Court!

Drugged To Kill

On Mental Health Warrants!

You Don't Pimp

Out Staff

To Sheriff Jeremy

Parsons, And Laugh Drunk

Serving "Rapists" Burgers!

Because You Drove 

Your Business Into

A Hole!

You Don't Steal Your

Celebrity 

Chefs Knves, Pans 

And Recipes,

Because He Won't Sleep

With You!

(Like Dennis

The Handyman!)

Steven Has Vows!

How Dare You Pimp

Him With Slander,

Sexual Assaults,

And Hound Me

Because He Left

You!

We All Need Reparations

For "Idyology" Damages!

Work Man's Comp

Ken Witnessed All!

Need Damages

For Broker Slumlordings,

3rd World Draught

Ponzi Scams!

Hooker Harems

Won't Do In Long-Term-

Covid,

For Our Precious

Children!

Need Rainforest, Tahoe,

Iowa Too, North Carolina

Water- Reparations!

EncinitasBeachHome.com

Hacked BACK Up

And My Kids

Delivered By Noon!

Or My Thuggie

Handyman Threatens

To Kill-

Us All!

Nitya Nella Davigo Azam Moezzi Huntley Rawal 

[calpalsworld]

soanyway the pirates mvoie 2012 is connected to jojars bizare adventure (THEORY):: the pirates (old) are too old (hella old they have no choice they have artritis) and settle down in in British (london) after finally having 1 adventure that goes extrely well, reaping 100 dollars! ! A lot of money! ` if you read my theory about The REAL NAMES (evil) of the pirates they Pirate captain’s name is Leslie-Clarence Smellie (Real) so when Biritsh Inhabitants say “What the hell is wrong with you. I’m not going to call you the Pirate Captain. Also are you a Pirate or something. That is pretty sus?” hechanges his name legelly because he doesnt;want to be called Leslie-Clarence Smellie -- its a very bad. So he picks up some blocks with letters on the sides them and plays witht them like a baby and forms the word “Joes Tar” and is like my name is “Leslie Joustar” and ok. And that made Pirate with a Scarf the first jojo in all history because (IF YOU READ MY THEORY ABOUT NAMES) you know his name is Jphn. SO hes John Joestar because they married through Matelotage THEN double marry through Fake Being a Woman Gag for the rest of your life-lotage. He gets tips on how to hide Your(your) gender from the Curvaceous PirErate but her advice is Bad. AnywaySo John Joestar (shhhhhh not a woman) and Leslie Joestar live the rest of their old lives in Britush and adopt (one day they steal the first child they see. they cannot hold these Pirate instincts back) and a child and they name a Child George Joestar and he grow up to give birth to Jonathan Joestar in 1868, and he give birth to George Joestar II and he give birth to Joseph “hore” Joestar and etc etc etc etc etc jojojojojojjojojojojjojojojojjoj. The piratw with a scarf (john joestar) is the last tie passthe way he leaves a letter that says: “Biggest scandal of my life! I am man I am gay I am love Leslie Joestar we had big Makeout sessions every friday and wednesday because thats when they kids(we stole) werent around. Peace bitch” and the historians were like “this could mean anything. we dont know how they would’ve identified their relationship today.” But thats just a theory

[memelleity]

sentence starters based on dumb shit my roommates say

❝ Coffee is finite, but click pens are forever. ❞

❝ We are all smelly in the eyes of god! ❞

❝ If I am soft when you attack me, I move slightly to the side and stab you in the back — Something something tai chi. ❞

❝ We went from sometimes-secular institutionalized Christianity to ‘Fuck The Nuclear Family.’ ❞

❝ I research all my bad decisions. ❞

❝ I am what I am, and I’m a lot of it! ❞

❝ The two things any good detective needs: the cops and a hard-on for a criminal. ❞

❝ It’s like, you’re like ‘I see what’s up here and I don’t know how to make it better but I sure know how to make it worse.’ ❞

❝ You’re like a less helpful Alton Brown. ❞

❝ Oh no, it’s too much of a banger! ❞

❝ Don’t use applesauce to self-harm! I can’t believe I have to say these words! ❞

❝ I’ve seen some gay stabbings in my time, too. ❞

❝ Wait, he had fuck with that guy?! ❞

❝ How do you know unicorns aren’t agents of the Vatican? ❞

❝ We’re exactly as bad as we are, if not worse. ❞

❝ I’m just a verbose bitch. ❞

❝ I just kind of unhinge my jaw and let inspiration speak through me. ❞

❝ Only feminists can say fuck! ❞

❝ That’s not a cryptid, that’s just a drag queen! ❞

❝ I’m quoting the Count, from Sesame Street, and Shakespeare. From Shakespeare. ❞

❝ I hope you have nightmares about weird forests made of dildos. ❞

❝ Your ghosts are your responsibility, motherfucker! ❞

❝ They’re both gay idiots, it’s just that […] is the dumber gay and […] is the gayer idiot. ❞

❝ Wait, so… Is pudding the British ’jawn’? Is that what you’re saying? ❞

[andyouweremine]

Give me a Leverage Sense8 AU or give me death. 

It’s Eliot who notices it first, a flash of blonde hair out of the corner of his eye. He’s used to noticing the people around him. He’s used to keeping count of every person in his eyeline, no matter how many people are in the room.

And this blonde woman should not be there. She should not be there when he has to force his way into a safe, but there she is. All in black, legs crossed on the desk beside him, ponytail swishing. “God.” She rolls her eyes. “A blowtorch. How crude.”

He glances over to her, but like a mirage, once he’s focused, she’s gone.

Two days later, Eliot’s about to deck a security guard when another woman shows up. Brunette hair and a lovely accent. “She’s gay,” the woman says. “Seduction won’t work no matter how hard you try, so you’ll have to find a different thing you both have in common.”

Eliot looks down and sees the tiny pin on her blouse. A pink ribbon. 

“There you go,” the woman says. All he has to do is tell her a story about a sick little sister, and he has her eating out of the palm of his hand. Then the woman is gone.

And then he shifts. It’s a quick blink. One moment he’s in standing on a street corner, and then next he’s in a chokehold. Instinct kicks in. He throws back an elbow and it meets flesh. One hit, two hit, three hits later, and there are two bodies on the floor.

Eliot shifts. In the center of the circle, panting heavily, stands a tall black man. “What the hell--”

But then Eliot is gone again. 

“It’s a sophisticated scheme,” the man with the bottle of Jack tells him. Eliot has already knocked two men two the ground, but there are more coming, and the fight isn’t over yet.

“You get someone’s credit information and start opening credit cards in their name. Then, you catfish some poor idiot and say you’re adding them to your credit card account. You get the idiot to buy you things for you on your card. Everything’s good until the credit card company gets wind of the fraud and shuts everything down, but by then you’ve cleaned everything up and moved on to greener pastures.”

“Dude,” Eliot growls, “I’m just here to get a necklace back.”

The man shrugs. “Was it insured?”

Eliot finishes slamming a goon’s head into the nearest table. “What does that matter?”

The man shrugs, and then he’s gone.

Parker doesn’t even really bat an eye. She kinda actually likes her new friends. Sure, the smelly guy with the weird hair is a bit odd, but he’s helpful in his own way. He can see the big pieces when she’s too distracted with the shiny things. He’s the one who figures out a fence is going to betray her long before she would have.

Then there’s the one who calls her “girl” all the time. He drags the word out too, like it’s prettier than one of the glittery diamonds she nicks. She likes him. She likes how he smiles at her, how he lingers in her presence a little longer even after he’s helped her figure out the code for a 15 digit lock.

The punchy guy, well, he took a little more time to warm up to. She’s not really a fan of fist fights. She’d rather hide. But when a security guard finds her and she can see the guy pulling his hair back into a ponytail, she smiles a little.

“Go for the eyes,” he tells her, holding up two bent fingers and pushing them forward in the air. She does, and it’s kind of satisfying.

“Oh dear,” the lady says to her every time she shows up. “No no no you mustn’t...” and then she goes on to tell Parker exactly how she’s not talking right. Parker kind of appreciates that. She’s not so great with the words thing. People are hard. Locks are easy.

Except these four people. They haven’t been hard. They’ve been like locks with easy combinations. Parker feels like she kind of knows them. Like the locks she picks again and again. She knows how all their inner workings are.

And that’s really nice.

Okay so the blonde is gorgeous. The blonde is gorgeous and the British lady is really good at talking her way out of problems. Hardison isn’t really sure what the point is with the dude who shows up to yammer on and on about cons and how Hardison might get himself caught if he does one thing or another. But even when he’s very clearly drunk, he’s still been helpful a few times.

So has the gun who is always hitting people. He’s gotten Hardison out of more than one scrape because Hardison has never done guns, will never do guns, and really really really doesn’t like being in the same room with people who want to hurt him.

And yeah, his knuckles really really hurt—his whole body hurts, actually— after the fighter helps him out of a few bad situations, but it’s better that than losing a pinkie. Or a toe.

So yeah, Hardison is okay with the people in his head.

Nate needs another fucking drink.

Sophie comes to see them all sort of like children. One is angry, one is hurting, one is lost, and one is alone. She’s the one who realizes they need to be brought together. She’s the one who realizes they are the solution to all of their problems. She is the one who sits beside a drunken Nate and helps him set out asprin and water for the morning. She is the one who sits quietly with a silent Parker as she picks lock after lock and studies countless blueprints.

She is the one who stands in an empty, threadbare apartment with Eliot when he cooks himself an extravagant dinner only he will eat.

She is the one who sees the late nights where Harrison binges on bad TV and orange soda.

She is the one who realizes that these people, whose pain she feels as if it is her own, all need each other.

Like she, when she’s tired of her fake names and her Rolodex of personalities, just needs them. 

Living with her loneliness, her isolation, is like suffering under a terrible weight.

They provide her with leverage.

[thekeenanblogger]

Chiang Mai – Thailand’s Culture Capital

When we first started planning our honeymoon, the first thing we agreed on was that we wanted to meet elephants. We’d both had fantasies of seeing an elephant up close — and were pretty sure we would both burst into tears. It didn’t take much research to learn that the best place to do it was in Chiang Mai, the largest city in northern Thailand. We built our itinerary around having an ethical elephant experience, but in doing so, discovered our love for this incredible city.

After a short flight from Phuket and a fifteen-minute cab ride, we arrived at the Anantara Chiang Mai Resort. The hotel, situated on the grounds of the former British consulate, is a stunning collision of architectural grandeur against the urban epicenter surrounding it. Upon checking in, we were greeted with butterfly pea juice, matching jasmine necklaces and a short neck-and-shoulder massage by their talented spa staff, a practice we pray will make its way over to America.

Our room was a huge suite, decorated in minimalist bamboo with a giant terrace overlooking the garden.

The first thing we did after dropping off our bags in the room was catch the afternoon high tea, a hat tip to their British origin. The tea and pastries were as delicious as they were beautiful, and it was the perfect way to decompress after our journey while still keeping a touch of elegance.

We spent the rest of the afternoon wandering the grounds. Every detail of the hotel seemed to be chosen with precision -- from the lotus flowers floating in jars lining the riverwalk, to koi ponds filled with lily pads and meticulously manicured gardens.

While we could have easily spent our entire time inside the gates of the Anantara, its close proximity to the hub of nightlife in Chiang Mai made it especially appealing. The hotel is only steps from the famous Night Bazar, which stretches for blocks during the evening hours, seven nights a week. We picked up some Christmas presents, window-shopped and finally tasted the infamously smelly-but-delicious fruit, durien. For the record, I loved it. (Scott wasn’t such a huge fan.) For dinner, we walked to Ginger & Kafe, place I’d found online that specialized in Chiang Mai’s signature dish, khao soi, a spicy, rich stew that still has my mouth watering just thinking about it.

After checking out the nightlife in Bangkok and Phuket, we were curious what the gay scene would be like in Chiang Mai. Spoiler alert: we were not disappointed! Just a block from the Night Bazar, Charoenprathet Road houses a stretch of gay bars and cabarets. We stumbled into Ram Bar, a whimsically festooned bar at the end of the street just in time for their 10 PM nightly drag show. What followed was honestly one of the best evenings of drag either of these two homosexuals have ever seen. 

The incredible dancing and performance level of these queens was staggering and the special effects — which included haze, bubbles and, I kid you not, one of the performers lighting her own hands on fire — had us howling to the point that we both lost our voices. Plus, Scott got dragged onstage for an impromptu dance!

When researching places to meet elephants, we didn’t realize how much of a problem tourist operations are for these incredible animals. Thirty years ago, when Thailand outlawed the logging that had leveled more than half of its rainforests, thousands of elephants that had been used by the logging industry were out of work. Too traumatized — and too valuable — to return to the decimated forests, most of them were forced into the tourist trade. In zoos, circuses, and the illegal logging trade that still persisted, these elephants were torn from their herds, held in sub-standard conditions in crowded cities or tourist-heavy beach towns, and brutalized at the hands of humans. But thanks to the work of Elephant Nature Park, a rescue and rehabilitation center in northern Thailand, these incredible creatures are being given a new home. No rides, no abuse, no tricks to perform — just elephants living together in the forest, like they’re supposed to be.

Our day was spent with eight other people, getting to meet two elephants — both sisters, aged twenty and three years old. Through the course of the day we got to feed them, go on a trek with them through the jungle, bathe them in the river and feed them their daily vitamins. It was truly one of the greatest moments in either of our lives, getting to see these beautiful creatures up close and in a sprawling jungle environment free of cages or chains. The Elephant Nature Park philosophy is to let the elephants do whatever they please, never forcing them into an activity. Rather, these creatures are very social and always seemed to enjoy the human interaction, especially the parts that involved ripe bananas.

After taking the longest showers of our life (it’s impossible not to get muddy when playing with elephants), we checked out of the Anantara and headed over to the Dhara Dhevi Chiang Mai.

The Dhara Dhevi Chiang Mai is, without question, one of the most incredible hotels in the world. Built by hundreds of traditional craftsmen in the style of a Lanna village, the Dhara Dhevi Chiang Mai makes guests feel like they’ve taken a step through time, wandering the streets of an idyllic Northern Thai city.

The villas — all large, luxurious and with individual architectural flourishes and floor plans — are secluded and peaceful, perfect for a romantic getaway. Our villa alone had to be ten times the size of our New York City apartment, complete with private pool and two stories of ultimate luxury.

The grounds, which extend for more than sixty acres, are dotted with temples, ponds, multiple pools, and immaculate gardens.

Shortly after checking in, we attended a private cooking lesson with Chef Juno, one of the chefs at Le Grand Lanna, one of the many restaurants on site.

Chef Juno guided us through a four course lunch menu of traditional Thai favorites. He was incredibly knowledgable and the perfect instructor. The food: unforgettable. We already have plans to recreate some of the dishes back home.

The staff at the Dhara Dhevi Chiang Mai made us feel so welcome and appreciated, from giving us a guided tour of the grounds to booking the perfect dinner table, with a prime seat to watch a traditional Thai dance performance in between courses.

During our stay we kept checking joking that it honestly felt like we were living in a dream, which is exactly what the Dhara Dhevi strives for. The hotel is so large that at times it felt like we had the place to ourselves. We couldn’t recommend it more to couples looking for an ultra-luxury hotel with a romantic setting that transports you into another world.

By the end of our honeymoon, we admit, we were pretty exhausted. Our two weeks were packed with such complete overload of the senses — from the pristine beaches that went on for miles, to the thumping music of Bangkok’s nightlife, to the most flavorful food we had ever tasted. We knew it would be hard to adjust back to normal life. But we find that our trip lives on, whether it be a funny anecdote that pops into our mind, or finding sand at the bottom of our suitcase and remembering the warm waters of Phang Nga Bay. We went off in search of a paradise, to find something untraditional and exotic, and Thailand delivered all that and more. As for being gay travelers? It went beyond feeling accepted. There is something every gay person feels in a new space – the feeling that you’re being clocked. In Thailand, no one ever batted an eye or looked twice as we held hands across a dinner table. It’s just not a part of Thai culture to judge. Now that we’re back in the states, the only thing to do now is plan our return.

[chimcharstar]

1-50 ho

you got it ho

1. What’s your favorite candle scent?

I AM SO GLAD YOU ASKED. ive been Purchasing various smelly candles for my gay divination activities, and i have a few nominees. i first thought of the candle i have now, a pink one with a very sweet vanilla smell, i love very sweet smells because it makes me think of candy which i tend to try to fill my inner void with. however im going to go with the first candle i bought, a dark orange one with a citrus smell. citrus scents are my next favourite and specifically this one reminded me of curiously smelling candles at my piano teachers apartment when i was very young. 

2. What female celebrity do you wish was your sister?

idk. ive been listening to her lion king stuff lately. dont judge me i needed to hear remixes of lion king music i was lost in that sauce in high school. and i just think shes neat. i dont think she would aggressively make me feel bad about everything, UNLIKE SOME PEOPLE

3. What male celebrity do you wish was your brother?

Look……. i really don’t know???? what is the criteria?? do they need to be like my siblings? dare i criticize my arguably criticizable siblings by picking out my ideal siblings? if i pick an ideal sibling, what does that say about what im lacking in my life? do i pick celebrities i hate so theoretically my family shames them into becoming silent and self-defeating

4. How old do you think you’ll be when you get married?

50. i think im going to have to figure myself out for a long time, and achieve some personal goals first. thats my excessively confident prediction and PERHAPS educated guess

5. Do you know a hoarder?

nnnnnoooooooo????? not a real, cant function because of hoarding hoarder. i can see in a few family members, including myself, liking to hang onto things that maybe become sentimental/unnecessary clutter but that sounds like something many non-hoarders experience?

6. Can you do a split?

lemme try one sec

NO

7. How old were you when you learned how to ride a bike?

Idk maybe 7? Or 11? i think my parents taught me at a children age and then i started biking for fun like, later, like pre middle school?

8. How many oceans have you swam in?

1. i dont really remember swimming in an ocean but i may have faded childhood memories of salty water and seaweed

9. How many countries have you been to?

2… i went to idaho for a band trip… my dad really doesnt like travelling

10. Is anyone in your family in the army?

HAHAHA

NO. ACTUALLY YES. but its funny because the specific brand of christianity we are supposed to be is super pacifist so ive heard. but then i remembered one dude apparently who joined the us military?????? it seemed like it was… an unusual choice. i dont really know anything else about this guy, not even his name

11. What would you name your daughter if you had one?

🙏 *inhale* buddy. oooooohhffffff i want to say something gender neutral honestly. i dont want to rock the boat being unconventional or something but im just thinking of all those years trying to live up to a feminine name

12. What would you name your son if you had one?

same i guess… why have i never thought about this????? was i preoccupied naming myself.

13. What’s the worst grade you got on a test?

hmmmmm hmmmmm trying to unlock the vault. i think i remember a 1 or a 0 on a math quiz. i think i got 30% or something very very bad (i dont even want to know) on my last english exam, but to be fair, i was having such a bad mental breakdown my professor did an intervention

14. What was your favorite TV show when you were a child?

like a very very small child? i was obsessed with the save-ums (?!?!?) for some reason. i would sing the anthem… no. theme song? i dont know. i guess it was catchy and there were lots of fun characters. OHHHH I SEE WHATS WRONG

ITS BECAUSE WE ONLY HAD A TV TILL I WAS LIKE 5 OR SOMETHING. what are you cultured people watching as children? what are the shows? 

15. What did you dress up as on Halloween when you were eight?

>:(

My Halloween experience:

i dont even remember i probably had some kind of fairy wings? i think i remember fairy wings. we went to one (1) house. later on, since we werent allowed to go trick-or-treating, we were each allotted a certain amount of candy, and if we ate more than a designated amount per day, we were in trouble and wouldnt be allowed anymore. i do remember getting in trouble for this. i think i stole someones candy. sibling against sibling. finally we were allowed to go trick or treating, i went with my younger brothers and by then, was a teenager and felt too tall and really uncomfortable

LMAO I JUST REMEMBERED THAT LAST TIME WE WENT TRICK-OR-TREATING NOT IN A RURAL AREA, my dad drove us around in a van and watched us like a hawk i believe. it was very tense and methodical.

16. Have you read any of the Harry Potter, Hunger Games or Twilight series?

i read the harry potter series (I WROTE SIBLIGS LOL) more times than i could count while growing up. i read the first hunger games book and didnt fancy it for whatever reason, and i had an obnoxious twilight-hating phase.

17. Would you rather have an American accent or a British accent?

no

sometimes, though, im really genuinely worried about what accent i do have. im worried i read so much harry potter growing up, it rubbed off on me. when i was a server, people would ask about an unusual accent i apparently had, and once, when i was talking to a super british guy who called me luv at walmart, he was like STOP. WAIT. YOU HAVE A BRITISH ACCENT. and i was like WHAT UHHH BYEBYE AND HE WAS LIKE NO. I HEARD YOU. STOP and i was like that michael jackson meme where he covers his face running away and everyone else in the line was staring

18. Did your mother go to college?

i believe she went to a bible college where people put a grand piano on top of the roof. 

19. Are your grandparents still married?

all of my grandparents are dead.

…. hmmMMMM yow. ok. my grandparents who werent estranged stayed married for as long as either of them were living… however, my OTHER grandparents, i mean the fucking kidnappers, my abuser grandpa… remarried? when he was… really really aging. im judging him for it because i know what kind of person he was.

20. Have you ever taken karate lessons?

I WISH. my parents didnt seem to like that sort of thing (surprise). im interested in it now but… as usual… i feel like its too late, im too old.

21. Do you know who Kermit the frog is?

….. i… i thought i did… hes blessed… thats all.

22. What’s the first amusement park you’ve been to?

ಠ_ಠ 

*crickets*

how could you ask me this?

no wait! i went to the waterslides. then, later on, i was never allowed to go to the waterslides.

23. What language, besides your native language, would you like to be fluent in?

Spanish. ive been “intending” to learn for a long time, and a lot of people who have been really good influences on me and been genuinely kind to me speak it, id like to learn it

24. Do you spell the color as grey or gray?

grey

one sec

yup thats canadian!

25. Is your father bald?

on the top of his head, yes >:(

26. Do you know triplets?

no?

27. Do you prefer Titanic or The Notebook?

no? what is this straight stuff? i listened to the dramatic titanic song and felt nothing.

28. Have you ever had Indian food?

i guess so, at a friends house! i dont think otherwise ive gone to a restaurant and actually had indian food

29. What’s the name of your favorite restaurant?

*gazes tearily at my OWN FUCKING OLD WORKPLACE

the food was sO GOOD MAN. IT WAS SO GOOD. im just not saying because despite how stalkable i probably am already, i dont want to be specific

30. Have you ever been to Olive Garden?

no whats that

31. Do you belong to any warehouse stores (Costco, BJ’s, etc.)?

w

belong? whats bjs? whats a warehouse for?

32. What would your parents have named you if you were the opposite gender?

i decided at one point they would never tell me this and it was no use asking. i do know they almost named my brother a very fusty old fashioned name fitting in with the thomas the tank engine theme 

33. If you have a nickname, what is it?

G is the ONLY one i will accept so far.

34. Who’s your favorite person in the world?

:)

i……… hmmmm…. i really dont like picking favourites. each person in my life has a unique relationship with me (even though a lot of them arent very warm, trusting or close). because of unhealthy middle school friendships ive grown an aversion to ranking relationships as if they have material value.

35. Would you rather live in a rural area or in the suburbs?

rural, i think. i need nature in my life!!! but i also need to be able to have connections to people.

36. Can you whistle?

yes, but not very loudly or accurately

37. Do you sleep with a nightlight?

no, but ive always wanted a nightlight

38. Do you eat breakfast every morning?

ive started to, yeah! this morning i made a whole thing with bread and mushrooms and eggs, and coffee, and i ate it outside watching the traffic. im really trying to treat myself nicely you see. its what id do for someone else.

39. Do you take any pills or medication daily?

THAT

BOY

JUICE!

WELCOME TO MY BUILD A BOY WORKSHOP!

SHOTS!SHOTS!SHOTS!

and im really fortunate to be in pretty good health, and have access to things i do need

40. What medical conditions do you have?

I dont think… i actually have any. id say gender dysphoria but i think it was informed consent. (im VERY lucky)

im pretty sure there are SOME mental conditions running around undiagnosed. MY BRAIN IS NOT WORKING PROPERLY

41. How many times have you been to the hospital?

for myself? once… when i got hives and started swelling up all over, but otherwise was fine. i really wonder what that was. other times was visiting sick/dying relatives which has made me feel sad and apprehensive whenever i enter a hospital or smell the food

42. Have you ever seen Finding Nemo?

yes! i had a gerbil named nemo! 

43. Where do you buy your jeans?

D:

i dont … remember … really nowhere special i actually have yet to find some jeans i LOVE. sometimes there is a pair of jeans that sparks joy. i do not have such a pair

44. What’s the last compliment you got?

my sister said my pants looked good on me. they are actually their pants, which they left on the floor in my room for an unknown reason, and they want them back. of course.

but because im excited about it and want to brag, the real compliment was when i made borscht and my sister not only ate it faster than me, but wanted a second helping. and my roommate stuck his face in the steam and said it smelled good. hell yes. i put fucking cilantro in it. fcking beast mode.

45. Do you usually remember your dreams in the morning?

yes. theyre usually really emotional and symbolic. if ive been talking to my parents, theyre usually nightmares. ive been reading about dream interpretation for a long time to deal with some of the ominous images that can come up

46. What flavor tea do you enjoy?

red rose reminds me of wheni was little my mom would make really sweet sweet red rose tea for me (thats the kind she drinks all the time) and it brings me those good feelings. otherwise licorice spice really appeald to me for some reason.

47. How many pairs of shoes do you currently own?

LMAO UHHH…brb

six. because of social pressure.

48. What religion will you raise your children to practice?

i never thought about this kind of thing…. i really don’t know….. id just want them to know how to be kind to others and themselves and thats literally it. 

49. How old were you when you found out that Santa wasn’t real?

i was one of those edgy kids trying to spoil it for everyone. guess what other common fun thing my parents didnt do

50. Why do you have a youtube? 

i dont! so i dont know what this question means! :)

HOLY SHIT I MADE IT THRU HIGH FIVE 

[toxicbolts]

“I love seeing people on this site, especially soft, millenial, LGBT people, not just disprespecting but actually insulting the armed forces, as if their existence in developed, free democratic countries doesn’t have anything owed to the men and women who died for their reality. Had a silly Spanish lesbian law student ranting about how the USA is to blame for her country being under fascist control for 40 years (she thought I was American), how the US military is a force of oppression and genocide of genders and races (Genders? Please remind me of when the US military waged a war on a gender, unless they mean Trump’s trans serviceperson ban)… etc. As if Spain didn’t fall to fascism from an internal civil war, between their own people and some help from the Nazis… Totally America’s fault, right? They were only bankrupt and on the other side of the world. But then you consider that this same girl was slandering the RAF, the british armed forces overall, and me for “worshipping machines of death, that murder people”, under the belief that we only fought to defend ourselves, for selfish purposes, and totally dismissed my point that I wouldn’t be able to see my friends at uni go to their first Pride if our pilots, mechanics, the women in the factories, and the engineers hadn’t won us the Battle of Britain. They’d have been murdered while living under a Nazi rule, given one is gay and the other is a Jewish ally. But no, apparently I’m disgusting for implying anything is owed to the armed forces for that.Then to cap it all off, she claims that it’s all meaningless if we’d been invaded and enslaved by the Nazis, my Polish grandmother had been murdered, my friends not allowed to live, and the Uk ceasing to exist, because we did nothing to win the war. Didn’t I know? The USSR would have done it all themselves, because if there’s one country a Spanish communist lesbian should be praising, it’s Russia! Let’s just ignore their history of treatment of the LGBT community, their present persecution and Chechen death-camps, and of course forget that one of the only reasons Moscow didn’t fall to the Nazis in the winter of 41/42 was the equipment being sent to Stalin by Britain via the arctic convoys, for which they have never paid us back, because they were getting their asses kicked so fast by the Panzer divisions that all their factories were being overrun or moved further east.In short, we have:-Entitled-Millenial-LGBT-Socialist-Historically illiterate-Hates the USA, and assumes anyone they disagree with is America-Hates on armed forces, all who serve in them, and denies any good as a result of the sacrifice of their own European neighbours who fought in France and the skies over Britain, while their country surrendered itself to fascism, but of course that’s all America’s fault too right?The true sacrifice of the armed forces is risking their own lives to defend despicable little shits like this, knowing they’d never do the same back.”

there is a lot to unpack here, but this bitch keeps insisting im a law student and not a lawyer bc he cannot wrap his smelly head over the fact that im a qualified woman who knows her shit, so better tone her qualifications down, because smart angry women are scary

also lots of shit i havent said, it’s hilarious

[zillanewt]

What’s In Your Head?

Chapter One // Chapter Two // Chapter Three // Chapter Four // Chapter Five

summary: So, the year is 1999. Eddie is 23 years old, telepathic, and lives with his childhood best friend, Bill, in Portland, Maine. He meets a young musician with a knack for speed named Richie at a bar. Based off @trashmouthloser‘s mutant!loser club headcanons!!

pairing: reddie

words: 2.6K

warnings: alcohol, pretty s*xual flirting (but no s*x)

A/N: i wrote a lot this time?? i think it’s because we’re getting into the good (gay) parts of the story and it’s so much fun to write. i realized that i forgot to write bill’s stutter in the first chapter, whoops. it’s really mild in this fic bc he has more control of it as an adult but he still has it. thank you so much for reading, liking, and reblogging!! Please message me if you would like to be added to the taglist!

A slight sting ran through Eddie’s head as he stirred from sleep. He faintly began to remember the events of last night and groaned at the thought of his forwardness. Quietly, he cursed Mike and Bill under his breath for not stopping him, but he checked his answering machine anyway - mentally prepared for either nothing at all or a disastrous rejection voicemail.

Nothing.

He supposed it was better than, “hey, fuck you. I’m not interested in bar-hookups.”

Only slightly, though.

Normally, he has to know a guy for months to even consider holding hands with them (which is the reason why most of his relationships fizzle out, but he prefers not to talk about that). But, he felt some sort of magnetic pull last night that he wants to blame entirely on a mixture of physical attraction and alcohol, which isn’t all that difficult.

Eddie got out of bed to take a couple aspirin only to find Richie sitting at his kitchen table, reading one of Eddie’s old Spiderman comic and sipping black coffee from one of the mugs Eddie’s mother sent him. His heart dropped from his chest into his stomach, as he stood there wide-eyed staring at him.

Dear fucking god, what did he do last night?!

He doesn’t even remember Richie coming home with him last night. There isn’t a pain in his lower back and his bed seemed to be stain-free, so they couldn’t have slept together. But, it doesn’t explain why a man he clearly saw get into a van with his band and drive off was sitting at his kitchen table.

Maybe, he was having a fever dream.

Richie sensed Eddie and glanced up from his comic book and coffee. When he laid eyes on him, he broke out into a smirk and had dark hooded eyes. Eddie didn’t have to be a mind-reader to know what Richie was thinking when he saw Eddie’s shocked stare and slightly agape mouth.

“Hey, princess,” he drawled, making Eddie’s face heat up in anger and embarrassment. Maybe, he didn’t like Richie as much as the alcohol did.

“Don’t call me that!” Eddie snapped. “What are you doing in my apartment?”

Richie tsked, with a faux frown. “You’re certainly being rude to a house guest,” he scolded.

“I don’t even remember inviting you into my house!”

Eddie’s face was as red as a Coke can, and Richie could clearly tell he was seething, as his stifled laughter indicated.

Suddenly, a huge roaring laugh burst from him and he yelled out “I can’t, Bill! I can’t do it!”

Bill entered the kitchen, laughing just as hard as Richie. But, when he looked back, Richie wasn’t Richie. He was Mike, pounding his hand on the table as he laughed so hard he was nearly in tears.

After a heated moment of confusion and fear, Eddie realized Mike used his shapeshifting abilities to trick him. If he was angry earlier, he was twice as angry now.

“You guys are assholes!” Eddie shouted, quickly turning on his heel to storm upstairs.

“Y-You should’ve seen the l-look on your face,” Bill shouted after him.

When he got up to his room, he immediately breathed out a sigh of relief that he didn’t fuck anything up last night. But, he also cursed himself because even a fake Richie could get him so riled up.

*************

Silently, Eddie stewed in his irritation and anger long after Mike had left to go home. Not speaking to him as they picked up around the house and finished various chores.

When Eddie heard the phone ringing in the kitchen, he bolted from the living room to answer it, ignoring Bill’s amused giggling. He swears to god that if this is his mom, he’s going to lock himself in his room forever.

“Hello,” he said slightly out of breath.

“Uuhm, hi,” the person on the other end says awkwardly, “Is Eddie there?”

“This is Eddie,” he tries to say with the utmost calmness but winced slightly at how enthused he sounded.

“Oh hey!” the voice says excitedly, “This is Richie.”

Eddie mouths the words “yes, thank you, Jesus” a couple times, pumping his fisting. He could totally hear Bill giggling in the living room and making kissing noises, but he really didn’t give a fuck.

Clearing his throat, he begins as nonchalantly as possible, “what’s up, Rich?”

Unknown to Eddie, Richie preens at the nickname on the other side of the line.

“A couple college students my bandmates know are throwing a party in the suburbs, and I was wondering if you and your friends wanted to come?” Richie said in an excited rush. Eddie could barely understand was he was saying, save for “party” and “wanted to come.” Typically, Eddie didn’t go to parties during his years in high school and college. When he did, he was always dragged there by a friend, namely Bill. But, this was an attractive musician he almost kissed last night.

This was all Eddie needed to know before he enthusiastically said “yes.” Though Richie couldn’t see it, he was vehemently nodding his head and bobbing up and down like an excited child. He could barely contain himself as he wrote down the address.

“Great! I’ll see you tonight, Eddie Spaghetti,” Richie drawled in his normal raspy voice, feeling slightly more relaxed.

Before Eddie could reprimand him for the nickname, he hung up, leaving Eddie under Bill’s intense gaze.

“S-so?” Bill asked.

“So, we’re totally going to a college party, tonight,” Eddie stated, pointedly avoiding Bill’s shocked stare.

“E-Eddie, you hate p-parties,” he deadpanned while looking at Eddie as if he had stepped out of an insane asylum.

The other man shrugged his shoulders nonchalantly, still avoid Bill’s eyes. He mumbled, “I don’t hate them that much.”

“In y-your own words, they are ‘smelly, loud, and a b-breeding ground for g-germs and STDs,’” Bill recited smugly.

“This is different.”

“How?”

“Cute boy,” Eddie stated simply. Bill shook his head in disbelief and relented to Eddie’s wish.

********

The house was far out in the suburbs and looked like something from those coming-of-age movies Eddie would watch obsessively as a kid. There were university students strewn out on the lawn, making out and drinking carelessly. A strong pulsing bass came from the house, coursing through Eddie, Bill, and Mike’s bodies as they stood on the sidewalk.

“I-I hope one of these kids don’t f-fuck up my car,” Bill confessed.

“Kids?” Mike laughed, “you only graduated just last year, Big Bill.”

Ignoring their bickering, Eddie walked away from them towards the house. It was exactly everything Eddie hated about parties: smelly, loud, and a breeding ground for germs and STDs. Belatedly, he realized he must look out of place once again, as he was dressed like a ‘80s rich boy with his striped long sleeve polo and khakis.

Maybe tonight was going to turn out to be a John Hughes movie after all.

He uncomfortably wandered through the crowd of college students, looking for the boy with dark grey hair. Just as he was about to give up hope, he spotted Richie sitting on the kitchen counter, swinging and singing along to Guns and Roses, while a redheaded girl, the band’s drummer if Eddie can remember correctly, giggles at the motion of his long gangly limbs. Richie was wearing the same grey leather jacket and silver boots as last night, but he swapped the pink tank top for a Pink Floyd shirt.

Eddie smiles fondly to himself and approaches them. The girl instantly notices and tells Richie to turn around with a smug grin. Richie whips his head around and his eyes go wide whenever he spots Eddie standing there and giggling. First, he gives Eddie an obvious once-over, then he grins wide and motions Eddie to come over to them.

“Eds!” he exclaims. “The cutest boy in the Portland area! You’ve made it!”

“Don’t call me that,” Eddie says as Richie places his arm around his shoulder. “And, you must be blind if you think I’m the cutest boy of anything.”

“Well, Edmund,” Richie says in a posh British accent, “I am legally blind according to the state of Maine, so I have to wear these babies.” Then, he pulls his eyelid slightly down, pointing towards the obvious contact lenses in his eyes. “But, you don’t give yourself enough credit, Eddie.”

Meanwhile, the girl is still watching this exchange, smiling as if she knows something they don’t. She clears her throat to get Richie’s attention.

“Oh yeah!” Richie said, “This is our drummer, Beverly.”

“I’m Eddie,” he says in response, sticking his hand out.

She takes it. “I heard quite a bit about you in the van last night, Eddie. Oh, what were you saying again, Richie? ‘God, he’s so cute. I want to eat him up like a Twinkie. I would’ve paid five billion dollars to have him pin me to that sta-’”

Richie quickly interrupted her in a British accent, “whoa, Bevvie! You insult my fair lady’s honor!”

Beverly just shakes her head and takes a cigarette out of her pocket. “I’m going to leave you two lovebirds alone,” she said as she placed the cigarette in her mouth, lit it with a small flame at the end of her finger, and exited the kitchen.

“So, do you want a drink?” Richie asked, jumping off the counter.

“Yeah, but I probably shouldn’t drink too much tonight,” Eddie said, biting his lip.

Before Eddie could say what he wanted, Richie got two beers from the fridge. They were both the cheap brand that you could get a 6 pack of for 5 dollars. But, Eddie wasn’t about to complain. He was with Richie, so tonight was already a pretty good night.

Richie made what was considered a pretty bold move in Eddie’s book and grabbed his hand, leading him towards the living room where the stereo was. Everyone in the living was circled around one person, Bill, who was using his powers to make the keg float. People cheered and shouted as if it was one of the coolest things they’ve ever seen.

“Your friend seems pretty popular,” Richie leaned in and said to Eddie, matter-of-factly.

Eddie took a sobering sip of his beer as he leaned against the wall and watched big jock-like guys slap Bill on the back. It was high school all over again.

“Yeah, I guess,” he shrugged. “Bill’s always had a pretty cool mutation.”

Glancing in his direction, Richie noticed how Eddie’s shoulders were slumped and his eyes were trained on the floor, silently nursing his beer.

“I bet you have a cool one too! Or, if you don’t have one, that’s also awesome! You don’t need to compare yourself to Bill,” Richie yelled over the loud music.

“Not really,” Eddie said quietly.

Richie encouragingly nudged him to share, because he genuinely thought Eddie didn’t need to be insecure.

“Ok, ok,” Eddie relented. “I’m a mind-reader. It’s nothing special, really.”

He lifted his head to look at Richie who looked positively lost for words.

“W-What?” Richie asked dumbly, growing hot in the face. “So, have you read my thoughts?”

A smirk grew on Eddie’s face as he watched Richie squirm under his gaze.

“Why Rich?” he asked in the best “sweet and innocent” voice he could muster. “Have you been thinking naughty thoughts about me?”

Eddie leaned into Richie playfully and got a good whiff of cheap cologne, feeling the heat in the pit of his belly when Richie unabashedly said “yes.”

Quickly, Richie’s eyes grew dark and hooded, as he kept glancing at Eddie’s lips without even trying to hide it. He leaned closer in, and Eddie didn’t feel the same courage coursing through his veins as last night. In the back of his head, he knew that if he started to kiss Richie, he wouldn’t be able to stop himself. Truthfully, he didn’t want this to be some one night stand, so he wouldn’t let it turn into one.

“Don’t worry,” Eddie whispered softly, aware of the little space between their lips, “I don’t read people’s minds without asking. It’s an invasion of their privacy.”

“You can invade my privacy any day, Eddie Spaghetti,” Richie said.

At this point, Eddie’s back was against the wall, while Richie leaned one arm against it. Before now, Eddie really never noticed the height difference between the two of them, but Richie simply towered over him, and Eddie could only stare at Richie with big brown eyes.

“What about you?” Eddie asked, awkwardly trying to change the subject, “What’s your mutation?”

Richie took the hint and backed away from Eddie, slightly disappointed. Little did he know, Eddie was also disappointed.

“I’m really fast,” Richie said proudly, taking a sip of his beer.

“What does that even mean?” Eddie sputtered.

“I could show you,” Richie drawled with a wicked grin.

But, it wasn’t an innuendo this time.

Richie actually grabbed Eddie’s hand and dragged him from the house. Once they got outside, Eddie felt the cold bite of the fall temperature, as he shivered slightly. Quickly, Richie took off his jacket and put it around Eddie’s shoulders, then hunched over.

“Get on,” Richie said impatiently.

Mentally, Eddie resented that he was small enough for Richie to give him a piggyback ride, but he didn’t voice it.

As soon as he was one, the world around him became a blur as he clutched on to Richie for dear life. And, in an instant, it was over. They were 5 blocks away from the house in front of an all-night convenience store. Eddie was ready to vomit all over the pavement while he dug around in his pocket for his inhaler. He took two quick inhalations, before turning around to glare at Richie.

“You could’ve got me killed!” he scolded, still trying to calm his insides.

“But I didn’t,” Richie pointed out, rubbing Eddie on the back as he worried his lip between his teeth.

Truthfully, he felt very guilty for making Eddie this uncomfortable and worried, but his mouth replied before he could stop it. Eddie looked at Richie’s face and took his earlier words to heart, reading Richie’s thoughts. His anger almost immediately dissipated.  

“I know,” Eddie said calmly and quietly. “I’m not mad at you. It’s ok.”

“Are you sure?”

“Yeah.”

Richie didn’t make Eddie get on his back again, but instead went into the convenience store and bought him a ginger ale. They walked the whole five blocks back to the house party (with Richie’s hand on Eddie’s waist), bickering and arguing. When they got back, Bill and Mike were laying on the hood of Bill’s car, blanking staring up at the sky.

“E-Eddie,” Bill hiccuped and then slurred. “You’re clearly the most s-sober, so you are the d-designated driver.”

He lazily tossed his keys in Eddie’s direction, clearly not worried whether Eddie caught them or not. (He didn’t).

After Eddie fished Bill’s keys from the gravel, he turned to Richie, whose arm was still around his waist, and said goodnight.

“Thanks for inviting us,” Eddie spoke softly as if he’d ruin the moment if he spoke any louder. “I had a really fun time with you, Rich.”

“No problem,” Richie replied. “You’re still the cutest boy in Portland, Eddie Spaghetti.”

Before Eddie could scold him for using that nickname, Richie leaned down for a quick peck on the lips. The same kind of kiss you’d give when dropping off someone after a first date. Eddie met Richie’s eyes when he pulled away and saw nothing but pure adoration there.

After they broke away and Richie was walking back towards the house, Eddie noticed he was still wearing the leather jacket.

“Wait, Richie!” he called. “Your jacket!”

“Keep it!” Richie yelled back.

Tonight truly did turn into a John Hughes movie.

taglist

@asteroidbill, @ttrxshmouth, @lukemybieber

[rodolfoparras]

imo, I think most of the ghosts aren't straight or are at least down to have sex with someone of the same gender as them since there's no one else to really fuck💔

There's also a silly guy named Pete, he's so dorky, silly dilf that's very optimistic😋 and there's like a douchbag guy named Trevor🙄 he's definitely my least favorite but he's funny sometimes. He died without pants, like he is literally walking around with his junk hanging out😭 the reason why is strangely sweet but weird also

And Thorfin is smellyyyy💀 not good smelly, like he soaked his furs in wolf pee for hunting so that's tragic💔 but if you like dumb, horrible smelling men, he's your type💪😼

I believe personally that Thor is possibly bi, just because he constantly mentions having orgies, which I'm assuming was just not him with a bunch of women, also considering Nordic culture and their gods, isn't unlikely he'd be somewhat open to queer ppl and such😼

The show is so good, definitely would recommend💪😼 I prefer the American version, there's a uk version and it's not like bad but it lacks some things for me personally💔

also !!! Isaac has a very interesting romance with this British soldier ghost >:3 they're so silly and dksnsns they take forever to open up about their feelings like omg just make out already🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥

-🌱

So what you’re saying is in another universe two gay ghosts are having hot heavy desperate gay sex🧎🏻‍♂️

Also from what I’m hearing there’s seems to be lots of different personalities in this ghost show? Can’t say I have seen that before! ALSO THE GHOST WHO WALKS AROUND WITH HIS JUNK OUT HELLO??3?;?; like all the time?? How do the others ghosts deal with that awkwardness 😭

Sugar you just told me a man is dumb as a rock and reeks of piss and then proceeded to ask me if I’d be into it OF COURSE I WOULD god I love my ridiculous men especially those who reek of piss

Tbh I wouldn’t doubt that! Does Thor speak any Nordic language in the show because as someone who is from Sweden that would be cool to hear! Although it would probably be like a much older version of the language

How come there’s two versions of the shows? Is it that popular? But I’ll def check out the trailer when I can! I think it’s strange that the plot is so unique yet I genuinely haven’t heard anything about this show

Isaac and British soldier ghost like 👨‍❤️‍💋‍👨 or 👩‍❤️‍💋‍👨 either way I’m all ears and eyes here 👀 👀👀

[dominoeswrites]

May I just say that I LOVE Rick Riordan? Not for any other reason than the amazing characters he creates: -Percy Jackson: a boy with ADHD and dyslexia. If you didn’t know, Uncle Rick originally created Percy like this for his son Haley who also has ADHD and dyslexia. But also, Percy comes from an abusive household. Smelly Gabe, even though he, from what I can gather, never hit Percy, nor did he hit Sally while Percy was around, but he was verbally, economically and emotionally abusive toward both Sally and Percy. And Percy overcame that. -Annabeth Chase: a girl, also with ADHD and dyslexia, who came from a family who she thought hated her. So she ran away. And found a new family. She ended up losing that new family by the time she was twelve. She believes that she can rebuild the world, and make it better. And in a way, she does. -Grover: a satyr that, when originally introduced to us, is disabled. Even though we find out he’s not, he still has flaws. He has made mistakes, and he feels inadequate. He overcomes this and becomes a member of the Council of Cloven Elders. -Thalia Grace: a girl who comes from an alcoholic home. She lost her brother, and ran away. She ended up turning into a tree, but came back from that. She became the lieutenant to Artemis. -Rachel Elizabeth Dare: a girl who comes from a rich home, but just doesn’t like it. She loves the earth despite her father’s company trying to destroy it. She can see through the Mist, and becomes the Oracle of Delphi. -Jason Grace: a boy forced to grow up too soon. He was two when he was abandoned, then he made his way to being praetor at 15, maybe younger. He never knew his family, and always wanted to bring about change. He was looked on as a hero, but didn’t feel like it inside. -Piper McLean: a girl raised by a movie star. She disliked being tied to that name, hated the idea of being beautiful. She made herself blend in, except when she stole. Or convinced them to let her have it. She overcomes her insecurities, and becomes beautiful, not through her mother, but through her own power. -Leo Valdez: a Hispanic boy who grew up with a loving mother, and then accidentally caused her death. He grew up in the foster system, being funny to try and cover up the pain of his loss. He didn’t like looking back, but Camp made him. He grew into his power, and fell in love. Now, he’s mature, and a leader. -Hazel Levesque: a girl who grew up when it was a sin to be black. New Orleans, in the forties. Her mother seemed to hate her, and she was an outcast. The one boy she loved she never saw. She died, then came back to life. She grew into her powers and made herself new. She started fresh, and now she has found love, and can shape the world however she sees fit. -Frank Zhang: a Chinese Canadian who lost his mother to a war. He was clumsy, he didn’t fit in. He hated himself. He went to the old country, where he fought and became what he was originally meant to be: A warrior. -Nico di Angelo: An OpEnLy GaY cHaRaCtEr like THAT DOESN’T HAPPEN A LOT IN CHILDREN’S BOOKS WITHOUT A LOT OF INFERENCE BUT NICO DI ANGELO IS GAY AND BY TRIALS OF APOLLO IS PROUD OF IT!!!!!!! -Apollo: An OpEnLy BiSeXuAl ChArAcTeR which doesn’t often happen at all ever, but IT’S BEING RECOGNIZED AS AN ACTUAL SEXUALITY BECAUSE HE LIKES BOTH BOYS AND GIRLS AND IT’S JUST BEAUTIFUL Also: The majority of these characters come from single parent homes. But that’s just PJO, HoO, and ToA. Let’s talk about other series for a second: Kane Chronicles: -Carter and Sadie are MIXED RACE. It is canon. Their dad is African American and their mom is British white. Again, that’s not something that really happens a lot in literature, period. -Carter traveled a lot, he had no permanent home. He was really lonely, and very close to his dad. -But seriously, even in modern society just imagine how hard it is to be mixed race. You’re not one or the other, you’re both, which also means that you’re neither. -Sadie grew up with her grandparents, being rebellious and just not wanting to be in England. She wanted to travel with dad, and when he died, it was hard on both of them. And Magnus Chase: -Magnus Chase: a boy who loved his mother, and grew up on the streets after she died. He was actually similar to Leo in his back story. He had a rich uncle, but he hated money, hated being confined. Then he died, and now he’s grown to accept himself. -Samirah al Abbas: a Muslim girl shown in a POSITIVE LIGHT AND DO YOU REALIZE HOW IMPORTANT THAT IS RIGHT NOW WITH ALL THE PEOPLE HATING MUSLIMS???? And in Hammer of Thor, she PRAYS!!!!!! Like do you realize how beautiful this is? She doesn’t believe in the gods as gods, but as creations of Allah. Like, she is one of my favorite characters. -Blitzen: a guy of unknown sexuality who loves fashion. The best part about this is that Blitz is not openly straight, gay or otherwise. He is just a dwarf who loves fashion, and this proves that you don’t have to be gay to love fashion. -Hearthstone: HE’S DEAF! Do you realize how many deaf kids will read this and realize how cool it is to be what they are??? A lot, is what I hope. It’s just so refreshing to see a disability like this shown in a positive light. Also, he comes from a home where he is made fun of for his disability. It is shown that he has it hard for being the way he is, which I also think is important. It is important to show that people can overcome people who think they’re stupid for not being like everyone else. -Alex Fierro: a GeNdErFlUiD cHaRaCtEr LIKE THAT IS SO IMPORTANT FOR PEOPLE WHO ARE GENDERFLUID, yes s/he is binary, but it’s still FREAKING AWESOME OKAY LIKE THAT IS A THING THAT I HAVE NEVER SEEN WRITTEN BEFORE OKAY In conclusion, Uncle Rick has taken the time to write amazing, beautiful, powerful, unconventional characters that we love. And it’s important that these are good characters, protagonists, because then we love them, and see that unconventional is good.

[a1detective]

Update, 12/19/2019

If we can be forced to say a man is a woman, there is nothing we can’t be forced to say.  If a lesbian can be forced to have sex with men, there is nothing we can’t be forced to do.  We will all increasingly be pressured to publicly affirm our support for these mores to the point where there will be nothing we can’t be forced to think.  And that’s the point.  A society whose subjects must not only declare but actually convince themselves that 2+2=5 is a society that is truly totalitarian, regardless of whatever lip service its politicians pay to democracy.

Read more: https://www.americanthinker.com/articles/2019/12/transgenders_attacking_ Follow us: @AmericanThinker on Twitter | AmericanThinker on Facebook

——————————————

Original Article:

Satire: BY JEFFREY A. FRIEDBERG

FROM BENEATH AREA 52….

images.techhive.com

<<<<<——————>>>>>

NOTE from beneath Area 52: 9/8/2019

This piece of satire really struck a nerve or a thong or jockstrap or tooth or something. Because it’s still getting Visits, and heated “Comments,” even though it was originally posted,  7/8/2019, which a relatively long time ago, in Internet days.

9/12/2019: ACTUALLY, it even seems to me, to be under some sort of attack….

If you hate the article so much, why don’t you just scrub the article from your site(s)?

Why Not?

I GUESS, MAYBE, BECAUSE IT GETS YOU CLICKS ??  🙂

This article is getting so many clicks, maybe I should put some ads on my site, which earns NOTHING, and write more articles like this one?

Thank you so much for the Traffic   🙂

<<<——->>>

Let me “signal” here that I don’t care what “Gay” does with each other. We always had Uncle Maurice—who was NEVER, “in the closet.” The Gay Hairdressers Association of Philadelphia always treated me politely as an 18 year old, hot-looking, lifeguard. 

Jeffrey A. Friedberg…”Even I was Once As You….”

<<<<<——————>>>>>

KATHY GRIFFIN IS DOING **WHAT** TO SMILING, SELF-PROCLAIMED, GAY ANDERSON COOPER? “Kathy Griffin has taken TV to a whole new level by giving Anderson Cooper’s ‘sack’ (her words, not mine) a smooch on CNN’s live New Year’s Eve broadcast.  I wonder if she missed the announcement that he’s gay? You can see the whole twisted thing here.”

———

Groin To Groin??

cdn.newspunch.com – OMG! I thought that was a woman! – Child laying on top of “Drag Queen Reader,” at a “reading.” Laying there, Groin to groin?

BUT—OH, WAIT!

STOP THE PRESSES!

THIS UPDATE (9/12/2019) EXPLAINS EVERYTHING:

Drag queen blames little children for shocking photos at public library

  Child Abuse, Drag Queen Story Hour, Drag Queen Story Time, Homosexuality, Oregon, Portland, Public Libraries, Transgenderism

PORTLAND, Oregon, September 10, 2019 (LifeSiteNews) — The drag queen who was shown in multiple disturbing photos to have frolicked on the floor with young children crawling over him at a Drag Queen Story Hour blames those children for the backlash he experienced.

LifeSiteNews first brought photo evidence of children having inappropriate contact with drag queen Carla Rossi at Portland, Oregon’s St. John’s Library to the attention of the public in July. The photos, which had been posted on the Multnomah County Library’s own Flickr account in October 2018, were quickly removed after the LifeSiteNews report went viral.

Drag queen Rossi, who last year said the kids were climbing on top of him after a dance move called a “death drop,” changed his tune after receiving criticism, saying the kids knocked him over as he tried to fight them off. He also blames his bad hip and the six-inch heels he was wearing at the time.

In an October 2018 Instagram posting in which he was pictured with a little girl lying on top of him, he said, “Drag Queen Storytime yesterday ended with a death drop on a bubble wrap dance floor as the babies crawled all over Carla Gulliver’s Travels–style, and I have the best job in the world.”

Shortly after LifeSiteNews drew attention to the troubling scene in the Portland library,  Rossi’s gleeful tune changed. In a subsequent Instagram post, he said he didn’t so much want to “set the record straight” as “break it altogether.”

“The photographed kids knocked me over and piled on me, and I laughed with them and their parents and the library director and told them we had to get up as I tried to look out for my bad hip in the process,” said Rossi.

“What would you do differently if kids having a Cher dance party — on bubble wrap — knocked you over in six-inch heels and a floor length rainbow caftan?” he asked.

—https://www.lifesitenews.com/blogs/drag-queen-blames-little-children-for-shocking-photos-at-public-library

https://www.lifesitenews.com/blogs/drag-queen-blames-little-children-for-shocking-photos-at-public-library

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Ass To Groin??

rwcnews.com – “8-Year-Old Becomes Drag Queen, Left Supports Behavior Despite Claims Of Child Abuse.”

  Duckduckgo.com

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  GAY MEN IN MUSLIM HANDS. “Kill All The Gays:”

“اقتلهم.”

What does the US Liberal say? “Oh, that photo was taken in Turkey.” I see—so— what? In that case it doesn’t matter? Ca ne fait rien?

        OMG! And I Thought This Was A Woman! i.dailymail.co.uk

GAY SEX TO BE REQUIRED FOR ALL? (“EXCEPT MUSLIMS?”)

Probably not immediately, but maybe—yeah.

Well, no, but—yeah, could be.

Nah. No.

Oh, speaking satirically, maybe at some future time, maybe when the diseased media, politicians, Hollywood, and other perverted social warriors decide, “The time is right,” but not right now. Nah.

BTW, no word from Muslims, but I already, however, totally do see maybe having Gay sex as a Test—a pre-requirement for joining ANTIFA (pronounced, “an-teefa.”) 🙂

  * I read someplace where Transgenders are upset and mad that “straights won’t date them.”

I can’t remember where I saw that. But this obviously has to be fixed. It can maybe be done by legislation or Executive order. Under democrat rules of equality, these trannie “folks” are apparently entitled to have sex with ANYbody they choose.

It seems to me that the LBGTXYZ (or Whatever) already rules Earth.

fthmb.tqn.com

It seems impossible to make a million, run for office, or keep your job without extolling a Gay Lifestyle, praising all sorts of not-usual sex, and watching Supergirl on Canadian TV.

When you even have the failed bartender, calling itself, “AOC,” on the Gay Bandwagon, then you know there is a large, loose, and smelly Movement coming.

“UHHhhhhhhh…I feel it COMING! (EEehhhhhhhh!”

Google, July 8, 2019

* I read someplace where we have already been asked to “take in” Nancy Pelosi’s gentle, divine, illegals. You know, board and feed them in our homes? The way King George had us take in British soldiers around 1776?

# # # #

UPDATE, 7/9/19: “

“NYT: Middle-Class Americans Must Sacrifice Their Suburbs to Aid Poor Immigrants”

I CAN ALMOST NOT EVEN KEEP UP WITH THIS WILD DEMOCRAT LIBERAL CRAP. IT JUST KEEPS POURING OUT—LIKE PROJECTIVE DIARRHEA.

YET, I REMAIN PROPHETIC.

SUBSCRIBE HERE.

* I ask, can demanding that we all have gay sex be far behind?

The intention of a group called SHFA (Super Happy Fun America) to run a Straight Pride Parade in Boston drew a whopping amount of poisonous attacks from the Left media, both social and mainstream.

The SHFA has been adjudicated as promoting homophobia, which is totally untrue, but at least could be remotely perceived, giving the usual twisted logic from the Left.  There are gays among the SHFA members and main figures of the event — Milo Yiannopoulos, a “right-wing” openly gay activist, has been appointed the parade’s grand marshal.

Nevertheless, the “homophobia” tag is not nearly enough.  On top of that, the parade organizers have been branded in the mainstream media as “people with connections to white supremacists” (defined as such by the ACLU) and the Alt Right.  Apparently, some among SHFA have certain association with the ResistMarxism organization, built with an aspiration to defend our Constitution, our Declaration of Independence, and the economic system based on capitalism (rather than communism or Hitler-style national socialism).  That, in the eyes of “progressives,” is a major sin on its own.

—americanthinker.com

Wow, I give this group, SHFA, positive credit. Even though they are already an object of leftist, deluded, lying, communist scorn. And will probably draw hatred, and violence.

I mean—they represent what was normal in America just a few years ago. Now, apparent maniacs have seemingly turned a world upside down with an unfathomable drive for seemingly “gay” ultimate supremacy.

And, “Socialist” sounds so much nicer than, ‘COMMUNIST.”

Who will protect this patriot group from the “tolerant,” benevolent, divine Left? Not the mayor of marathon-bombed and 9/11-airport Boston; he appears to be a deluded fool. Not the politicians, media scum, or kneeling (kneeling?) “entertainers.

The police? Maybe; we still have to see if they will even “approve” the march, we are told.

Because, you see: in my opinion, a “Gay,” Leftist, Communist, Illegal, Muslim-Jihadist, and Democrat-almost-Mafia-like Rule has somehow been insinuated into America’s Blood—as being “the new Normal.”

d.ibtimes.co.uk

YOU HAD BETTER OBEY.

BECAUSE, “Social media,” and mafiosi, ‘bots, algorithms, search engines, leftists, and communists, can Find you.

They can SILENCE you.

Not only might they critique your punctuation, and grammar, But They Might Also evaluate sentence construction!

WORSE— they can be FUNNY!

Even though it’s just satire, they can say it’s not— that it’s “the government,” that it’s “a conservative ploy,” or that it’s “from Area 51!” Nothing matters to Them—certainly not the truth—only ascendancy, of their Communist Doctrine.

But, they Can Still Fix You in Place. They can Scorn and Attack you, They can Swarm as taught doctrinally in “schools,” Destroy you, and Get You Fired. Your Life could be over.

Therein lies your democrat “freedom” and “equality.”

Love it. Live it:

“FREE AT LAST!”

  Hey Kids, on both your sides: Jeez—CAN YOU MAYBE BE MORE TOLERANT OF EACH OTHER?

.

  Jeff Dunham’s, “Achmed The Dead Terrorist.” – i.ytimg.com/vi/kF7znANAAkM/maxresdefault.jpg

* *  PS: Kids, I had so much hate mail, sex-filth, and death-threats from the “tolerant, fair, humorless, peace-loving” side—who seemed so hatefully intolerant and violent toward satire—that I could not keep The site cleaned of their remarks. I mean, I don’t think I can print what some sent me. 

So, I closed down “Comments.” 🙂

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    UPDATE: Will Having Gay Sex Soon Be Required For All American Citizens? (“Excluding Muslims?”) Update, 12/19/2019 If we can be forced to say a man is a woman, there is nothing we can't be forced to say…