#I CANNOT BE SEEN OUTSIDE

[halinski]

.

[soups-archive]

Honestly, I don't think people give qCellbit enough credit. As much as he can be blinded by his own self depreciation, he knows his husband.

And there is something deeply wrong with "Roier."

Props to cc!Roier for his acting, because as someone who's been watching the both of them for almost a year now, the way he plays Doied with qCellbit makes my stomach churn a little bit.

It's an almost perfect impression of qRoier, but it's wrong in the ways that matter. He's a little too careless. A little too surface level in his portrayal.

He feels like if someone watched Roier's pov and took his attitude at face value without bothering to consider any of the nuances underneath. Which is, I guess, what Doied actually did.

He hits Cellbit with a sword when he's under-geared just "for fun". He stands back in fights when Cellbit's calling out for help. He nonchalantly brings up Bobby in order to convince the eggs and Cellbit to leave. He tells Pepito that he's Pepito's only parent and that Pepito is only his son. The small details all add up together and the result is something immensely off.

It's VERY well acted, and it's the kind of difference that only someone who spent a long time with a character could pick up on, which is exactly why I think qCellbit seems to have caught on so quick.

[youaremydearestdream]

the outsiders musical rant !! sorry if this doesn’t make sense, i just had to get it out there !

i find it interesting that despite being the main character of the outsiders musical, ponyboy does a lot of harmonizing with others instead of just taking the melody

he takes the melody when he’s narrating,, especially about his problems (tulsa ‘67, his solo parts in i could talk to you all night and far away from tulsa, etc.) but when he sings with other people, he is normally heard harmonizing

he opts up in grease got a hold and great expectations, leaving everyone else behind as they sing the melody. this shows his yearning for a life outside of tulsa, and a life outside of his problems. he takes the lower harmony in i could talk to you all night with cherry, and the highest harmony in throwing in the towel. he is always consumed by the need to get away.

cherry keeps him grounded. he can relate and connect with her, but it’s not enough. meanwhile, pony is disconnected from his brothers, but with darry most of all (darry sings the lower harmony, musically the furthest away from pony) while soda is the connector between the two, which is why soda is the one who takes the melody during the chorus of throwing in the towel when all three brothers sing together— soda is literally in the middle of them, stuck between a rock (darry) and and hard place (pony)

ponyboy is almost always harmonizing with everyone, except for when he’s with johnny. johnny is who he sings of running away with. by killing bob (in self defense!!) johnny is the one who makes running away a reality, which is why it’s fitting that johnny is the one takes the harmony when he sings with ponyboy in far away from tulsa and death’s at my door. he’s the one that pony feels the most safe and comfortable to be himself around because pony knows that johnny always understands him.

it’s only until after johnny dies that pony begins harmonizing with him instead, jumping between low and high harmonies during stay gold. this shows how affected he is by johnnys death— his harmonies are as “unstable” as he is. he finally comes back to the melody when he sings the last line of the song by himself, internalizing johnny’s message: to stay gold, to be himself, and to learn that there are so many more reasons to why life is worth living.

during the finale, he lets darry and sodapop read out the narration, showing that he has successfully mended the gap between him and darry. he sticks to the melody throughout the entire song. he no longer opts up like he did in the beginning because he has realized that running away from his problems (and running away from the melody) cannot solve anything. by the end of the outsiders musical, ponyboy has finally grown into his own skin and is no longer ashamed of where he comes from.

[swiftietartt]

theatre etiquette is at an all time low, y’all cannot be singing and shouting things at actors. period.

they’re doing their jobs, and i did not pay the ticket price to listen to you.

[kaiserouo]

moderately sized ghost

[feroluce]

Belobog was my fave main quest but a lot of it is so. Contradictory. It's like they had multiple groups doing different shit and none of them checked in with each other for consistency. And you see this so much in Gepard's profile.

So in the main quest, they made him unfailingly, unquestionably loyal to Cocolia. Gepard's character arc is him learning to question authority etc etc. And this isn't even a bad thing; that's a story worth telling! It makes good conflict between him and Serval! And I love that we got Gepard as a boss battle and I get to see him all the time in SU!

But then you look at his character stories and it's like. The complete opposite.

According to his profile, Gepard has already HAD this awakening, long before the Astral Express, and he'd already decided Cocolia sucks. Even outside of his stories, there's a pretty damning readable between him and Pela.

He even disobeyed direct orders right in front of her- he has been disobeying orders for a while now!

So I've decided I'm marrying the two different sides of this into a 1.5k fic-ish thingy, because I think there's some fun potential there with Gepard not trusting Cocolia, but still having to pretend to be a good obedient little soldier.

Anyway. I love to think of it as like. Gepard knows Cocolia has sunk into her apathy. He can see it in her eyes every time he looks at her. She doesn't care. Not about him, not about Pela, not about all his soldiers on the frontlines giving their lives to protect the citizens. And that's... It makes him bristle a bit, but ok. Gepard can deal with this. Even if Cocolia no longer cares, as long as she does her job then it's fine. Having compassion behind an action doesn't matter as much as the action itself. If Cocolia's heart is no longer swayed, then he'll just have to care twice as hard to pick up the slack. He considers it part of his duty as a captain of the guard anyway. It's fine. Gepard can deal with it.

And then, Cocolia starts coming down to the restricted zone. Issuing direct orders.

And Gepard realizes he is in way over his head.

Because Cocolia orders him to stay back and issue commands from the ramparts, away from all his comrades, away from where he can protect them.

Gepard had thought nothing could be as bad as watching a fellow guard die right next to him. But the first time he watches someone struck by a killing blow, so far away, it hurts. Every defensive scar across his arms itches, his fingers curl in want of a weapon, the cold cannot numb his hands enough as they desperately ache for his shield. It hurts.

Gepard tries to find any reason to stay. Because surely... He knows Cocolia has lost her love for her people, but surely... She wouldn't...

One day, Cocolia orders for their gunners to advance 20 yards. There are no survivors. She almost looks like she smiles.

Gepard doesn't sleep that night.

Pela brings him the report at the end of the first month; and then the month after that, and the month after that. A significant uptick in losses, and all of it started on that first day Cocolia started overriding his authority and issuing her own orders. The ends of Gepard's pens have all been nearly chewed off. Pela outright calls Cocolia an idiot, and Gepard corrects her. Cocolia isn't an idiot. Gepard had known her through Serval, knew her through all her college years and then some, and he knows how intelligent she is. It's not that she's stupid, and it's not that she's inexperienced, it's nothing of the sort.

Cocolia knows exactly what she's doing.

She must, there's no way she could make such a horrible mess of things so badly by accident. And Pela, quick as a whip, sharp as a tack, always too smart for her own good, catches onto the meaning behind Gepard's correction without any further prompting. The tent goes deathly quiet, nothing but the wind howling outside.

"...She's trying to kill us," Pela whispers, her voice swiftly suffocated by the silence.

Gepard swallows. He can't bring himself to correct her this time. There is nothing he could say that he would actually mean.

His gaze drops, back down to his desk and the reports on it. The names aren't listed, just the numbers, but Gepard knows them, knew them, and there must be something wrong, something he's missing, because why, why would she-? What could this possibly accomplish-?

“Gepard! Focus!” Something snaps right under his nose, and Gepard startles, eyes instantly honing in on Pela's irritated face as she leans over his desk. She holds his gaze for a moment before she huffs and begins to pace, wedges a knuckle between her teeth and bites like Gepard hasn't seen her do since cadet school.

Pela angrily strides from one end of his tent to the other, words hissed between her grit teeth. “What are we going to do?” In the dim lighting, Gepard can just barely see the damp spot of blood weeping under her gloves. “We need a plan.”

“A plan?”

“Wh- Yes, a plan! Unless you want more people to die!” Pela rounds on him then, all the wrath of a blizzard, winds roaring and snow sharp enough to cut.

“We don't even know-”

“What does it matter?! She killed-!!” Pela cuts off with a garbled noise when Gepard leaps up from his desk, hastily shoves his hand over her mouth. The prosthetic, not the flesh one, because he knows better than to assume Pela won't seize the opportunity to leave teeth marks in his skin.

“You're right. I'm sorry, I'm sorry; you're right. But you need to keep quiet.” Pela quirks an eyebrow at him and Gepard can read the question in her face. “Because we both saw what she did to Serval,” he hisses.

It's amazing the snow plains haven't thawed out yet, the amount of heat Pela can put behind a glare. The mere mention of Serval, and the smoking ruins Cocolia had made of her life and career, have her bristling up like a riled cat. The sudden hot breath she takes fans fog across his metal skin, and Gepard wisely keeps it in place until Pela finally sighs and reaches up, taps her fingertips against the back of his hand.

The second she's free, Pela bats him away and then her knuckle is right back between her teeth again, Gepard leaning back against his desk with his arms crossed to watch her resume her pacing. “If we spread the word, she'll have us discharged and make sure we can't even touch the frontlines,” Pela's voice seethes like an open sore. Gepard nods but keeps his silence. He knows better than to get in her way.

“And if you and I are both out of the picture, Belobog is fucked.” A little harsher than how he would have put it, but there's no denying that they're both important to the city's survival. Pela has the restricted zone running as efficiently as ever, and Gepard had become the youngest captain on record for a reason. “We need to keep this tight under wraps, at least for now… It can't leak to anyone higher up the chain.” Another nod. “Serval might know other discontents…” Another n-

Gepard's head snaps up. “No.”

“No what?”

“No. We're not involving Serval in this.”

Somehow, even the same tone that leaves entire squadrons shaking in their boots has never worked on her. “You're not deciding that for her, Gepard.”

Pela hadn't seen the worst of it, though, back when his sister had just been banned from the Architects. Serval's pride hadn't allowed it. Pela wasn't the one to find her passed out bottle still in hand, hadn't been the one to wash the sick out of her hair or carry her to bed. 

Serval still has trouble thinking clearly when it comes to Cocolia, still can't quite bring herself to be objective. And Gepard maybe doesn't want her to be purely objective- but he would worry a lot less if she thought twice before she acted more often.

“At least let me be the one to bring it up to her.”

“Whatever, fine,” Pela gestures affirmatively at him as she paces past, and Gepard sighs. Good, at least that's one thing he can help.

From there, it's a lot of hemming and hawing and frustration. Cocolia has them under her boot, and Gepard and Pela both know it. Even with the way she's been cracking down on freedoms lately, Cocolia is still, overall, liked by the people. It's unlikely anyone would believe them. They don't even have solid proof, because most people don't know Cocolia as well as they do and won't see the clues in the same light. 

The Fragmentum has been ramping up in recent years, too. Everyone is struggling just to survive as is, they can't afford a fight on two fronts. Gepard is a damn good captain, one of the best for that matter. But they're at a massive disadvantage, his experience is narrowed to fighting a defensive battle against monsters, that's all he's ever done. That's all anyone there has ever done. He has no way of finding first-hand knowledge for taking the offensive against a human opponent, and if he goes at this blind, there's no way he'll get everyone out unscathed. He's going to lose people. He's going to lose a lot of people.

He'd never thought before that Cocolia would have it in her to have someone killed. And with this new knowledge, he has no guarantee she won't go after Serval or Lynx if she decides to retaliate.

Gepard has to remind himself to breathe when he realizes this.

Pela writes down every name the two of them can come up with. Lists and lists of names and groups and anyone they can think of who might be an ally in all of this. They memorize every bit of it, make their plans of who to talk to and when. Gepard watches the sparks reflect off Pela's glasses as they burn the evidence together.

Pela finally leaves, far too late to make it home, but says she wants to stay in the restricted zone anyway to investigate. Gepard watches her make her way in the direction of Dunn's tent, watches her back until she's out of his sight and squashes down the urge to follow and keep an eye on her. His tent feels empty.

In the morning, Gepard is up before the wake up bells. He drags himself out of bed, leads his soldiers through their morning training. The same people gravitate to each other everyday. Friend groups and training partners. There's an ongoing rivalry between a few squadrons that everyone bets on. Some of them have lockets around their necks, keepsakes, mementos. Some of them wear wedding rings.

Gepard is suddenly, painfully aware of something acidic clawing at the inside of his throat, of a heavy weight low in his chest that blooms, takes up room until it threatens to spread his ribs. His mouth tastes of bile and blood.

He rearranges the schedules. Puts himself down for every open patrol into the Fragmentum, makes sure he'll be on the frontlines every single time Cocolia visits.

He only hopes that it's enough.

[kindahoping4forever]

Ash via IG

[selkiemaidenfae]

i’m a bit too hungover to fully articulate this the way i want to but

there’s something about camila dragging billy to that party where he’s immediately offered alcohol because she’s never truly seen his addiction for what it is vs daisy staying in his tour bus with him because she understands that they’re fighting the same struggle

there’s something about camila not really having any clue why billy needs daisy so much to the point where she has to ask if daisy’s a better lover than her vs daisy inherently understanding why billy had to choose his family despite never having a family of her own

there’s something about camila never intervening in the billy/eddie conflict in all those years vs daisy showing up and immediately telling billy that aurora needed to be eddie’s project too

there’s something about billy writing the same songs over and over with camila vs daisy forcing him out of his songwriting comfort zone leading to him writing the most personal and beautiful songs of his career

something something daisy allowed him to be the truest version of himself while camila let him hide behind the idealized version something something billy ultimately chose camila because he wanted to be the man that she saw instead of the complicated mess that daisy understood him to be

[whatsfourteenupto]

All jokes aside I don’t understand a lick why we now have to wrap our brains around “Sutekh has been in the TARDIS the whole time!!!” when “Sutekh clawed his way back out of the void dripping ichor and rage the moment that salt created any hint of a door and has been hiding in the TARDIS since then” would’ve been just as effective

[abel-draws]

Let the fun begin.

[trans-xianxian]

I think we gotta start recognizing that "things accepted online/in leftist spaces" and "things accepted by the general public in the real world" are two very different things. like no actually gnc men are Not suddenly seen as okay because there are drag queens on tiktok. men are still beaten and harassed and ostracized and Killed for being feminine. in the us. in my very liberal city full of ppl with blue hair and pronouns I am made to feel uncomfortable and unwelcome for being a gnc guy. the tiktok comments on videos of men wearing make up are not indicative of the beliefs of most people

[what-is-it-to-be-pk-esque]

My partner finally finished BG3 but has no idea that his ending was actually bad cause he was a pro-Vlaakith githyanki who rode off with Lae'zel but got NO EPILOGUE where Withers points out y'all died im 😭😭😭

they have no idea what happened with Gale or anyone else (who was still alive) after flying away 🙃🙃🙃

[bectheturtle]

Me when. Me when In Stars and Time where the themes of the story are irreparably wrapped up in the character's deep set loneliness and self loathing

[vettelcore]

people with outdoor cats be like: yes my cat came back home half dead, caught hiv, is full of parasites and sometimes has gone missing for weeks but i don't care bc at least the cat is free and not locked inside like selfish people do!!!

[pickapea]

my job is reactivating and rehabilitating patients in post surgery care and one of the first things i tell them once they've tried to drink some juice and stand on their legs without throwing up is "every bite is a good bite" and i think that's a good sentiment for everyone

[kurbcotain]

Tom and Geoff at Cleveland, OH on Warped Tour src, photos by The Rev