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#I HOPE YOU LIKE THIS THO. MY HEART BLEEDS 4 THEM....
ybcpatrick · 1 year
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HC that post!YBC Patrick and Joe both spend an unhealthy amount of time working in the studio to “cope.” Joe notices Patrick has a problem but insists it’s different when he himself does it because it “isn’t as bad.”
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i've had both of these asks for almost two calendar years. i am SO fucking sorry about that. i'm gonna group these two together, and i hope this maybe makes up for it. 💖
"How's he doing?" Joe asks as he approaches, voice kept carefully low. Andy sighs, gently closing the door to the studio behind him.
"Patrick's fast asleep at the desk. He wore himself out with his episode earlier." Andy runs his hands over his hair, scraping at the shaven sides, and adds, "I was gonna move them both, but I know Patrick would probably flip out again if I did, so I just saved his work and threw a blanket over him."
"Good idea," Joe murmurs, then pauses. "Wait, both?"
"Pete's in there, too," Andy clarifies. "He passed out on the floor beside Patrick's chair."
Joe winces at that, brows knitting together. "Their backs are gonna kill 'em tomorrow."
"I know, but they're sleeping," Andy emphasizes, "and I'm not sure how long it's been since either of them have gotten more than an hour or two." He throws his hands up in faux surrender, backing away from the door as he says, "I'm not touching them. They can go ahead and hate me tomorrow if they wanna, I don't really care."
Joe elects just to shrug, and they fall into a pensive silence. Staring at the studio door, a familiar itch comes crawling up Joe's back; his fingers twitch where they're shoved into his pockets. He clears his throat softly, and his socks scuff against the carpet as he takes a deliberately-casual step forward.
"Ooookay, well, if they're both out for the night, I'm just gonna pop in quick and grab an acoustic–"
"Joe–"
"–I'll take it to the basement, don't worry, I'll make sure they don't hear me at all–"
"Joe."
"– I just wanna finish off that hook I had going earlier, I think I've almo–"
"Joe."
Joe freezes, fingers barely ghosting over the door handle. When he peers over his shoulder, Andy is already staring back, his tattooed arms crossed over his chest. His grey eyes are nearly black in the dim light of the hallway, and he looks tired. Guilt briefly squeezes its cold fist around Joe's ribs.
"Joe, it's nearly midnight," says Andy. He brings a hand up to rub at the sides of his nose (an old habit from when he still had his glasses he hasn't managed to kick yet), and falls against the opposite wall in defeat. His voice is unbearably soft as he pleads, "Come to sleep?"
And the thing is, Joe wants to.
He really does.
He just...
The thought of not finishing his work makes his stomach roll.
So instead of acquiescing, Joe crosses the hallway, leaning into Andy's space. He traces his fingertips, feather-light, over the ink-dark skin of Andy's forearms. Saccharine-sweet, he whispers, "I just wanna finish the hook. I'll do it quick, record it on my phone so I don't forget it in the morning, and then I'll be right there in bed. Then you can do your weird-ass impression of a spidermonkey-octopus thing while we cuddle like teenagers, or whatever." Joe tilts Andy's chin up to look him in the eye, flashing a reassuring grin at him. "Sound okay?"
Andy stares at Joe for a long moment. His typical silence feels more pronounced here, as his gaze darts all over Joe's face, seemingly searching for something there. That damned itch dances its way up Joe's spine again, leaving the chill of uneasiness in its wake; the corners of Joe's mouth crack like plaster as he forces his expression to stay light.
(He prays to anything for Andy not to notice.)
After another beat, Andy's shoulders slump, and a small smile graces his face. His hands find Joe's with practiced ease, weaving their fingers together tightly. He arches off the wall, using Joe's weight as leverage, and crowds so far into Joe's space that there's hardly anywhere left where they aren't touching.
"Just the hook?" Andy asks, his breath ghosting over Joe's lips as he cranes up, tip-toed, to nuzzle their noses together. Joe makes a small sound of assent, not trusting himself to say anything more as warm relief washes over him. He brings their joined hands up to his mouth and drops a lingering kiss on each of Andy's knuckles, his gaze trained on the way Andy's lashes flutter against his cheeks in response.
Andy's grip on him tightens for just a second, then falls slack as he whispers, "m'kay, go get the guitar. I'll meet you downstairs." At Joe's perplexed look, he adds, "I'm gonna come sit with you 'til you're done." Guilt lances through Joe once more, his eyes blowing wide.
"Dee, you don't have to stay up for me–"
"I don't have to, I want to. I like hearing you work." Andy cuts him off, with a finger against his lips. After a second, he shifts his hand, carefully cradling Joe's cheek. He smiles again, but it's tinged with something else, something that makes Joe's heart ache in his chest. "I just like you."
Sudden heat pricks at Joe's eyes and he quickly snaps them shut, leaning into Andy's touch. That awful itch, along with the guilt, takes a backseat in his brain for the time being, corralled there by the warmth of Andy's hand and the simplicity of his words; for just a moment, he savours it.
Before long, Andy's pulling away, nudging Joe towards the studio door. He gives Joe a stern warning about waking up Pete and Patrick as he walks away, and Joe keeps his eyes locked on Andy's back until he's completely disappeared from sight.
Quiet as a mouse, Joe slips into the studio. As promised, Patrick is bent over the desk, his folded arms shielding his face from view. Pete is sitting slumped beside him on the floor, unflatteringly open-mouthed and folded up like a pretzel. The throw blanket is haphazardly spread out over Patrick's broad shoulders, the edge fluttering mere inches over the crown of Pete's head. Even in sleep, the pair look utterly exhausted; Joe can't help the way he frowns.
He feels them. He's tired, too. Really fucking tired. And so is Andy.
But Joe can't stop yet, and Andy knows that. And Andy is waiting for him in the basement, because he's sweet like that. Because he's thoughtful.
Because Andy gets Joe, perhaps even more than Joe gets Joe, and he understands that Joe can't give it up quite yet.
Carefully, Joe slinks around the sleeping pair, grabbing his acoustic from the loveseat he'd abandoned it on earlier. On his way back out, the telltale whisper of fabric shifting stops Joe dead in his tracks at the door. Heart in his throat and apologies at the ready, he peers over his shoulder at Pete and Patrick.
Patrick has shifted in his sleep. His good arm has fallen into his lap, palm up. His slack hand is close enough to Pete's head that his fingers are tucked, just slightly, into Pete's dark hair. Pete snuffles, a little gross-sounding, and subconsciously leans into the contact.
Neither one stirs again. Watching them for a moment longer, Joe's smile grows a bit wobbly. Drawing in a deep breath, he eases the door shut once more, and leaves them to their slumber. (With any luck, they'll wake up at some point through the night, and at least have the sense to lay down on the furniture or something, but Joe's not counting on it.)
As Joe makes the descent to the basement, slinging the guitar strap over his shoulder on his way, his thoughts become preoccupied once more with the hook from earlier. Perhaps Andy, though sleepy and spent as he is from the day, may have some ideas for how Joe can nail it down.
After all, the sooner he does, and the sooner he satisfies the itch, the sooner Joe can get some rest, too.
He's just gotta finish, first.
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once-upon-an-imagine · 10 months
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You Keep Me Hangin' On - Steve Harrington
A/N: sooo, apparently it worked 😂😂😂 thank you to everyone who voted, I might keep this up since it helps me focus on a specific story😊 I mixed three different requests here so I really hope it makes sense, this one is mostly angsty but I am planning on a part two, so let me know what you think  
Requests - dawninparis​ asked: is this how you request something? i don’t know i’m a bit new to all this 😳 anyway i saw you were accepting st request so i was thinking maybe steve and reader are in an established relationship but with all the stuff happening in s4 and reader not being aware of all the supernatural stuff she gets jealous of all the time he spends with nancy and the fact he is hiding everything from you just to protect you and just basically a lot of angst (bc i like to suffer) and ending however u like even tho my heart is easily broken with sad endings 
- Anonymous asked: I would like to request a Steve story that takes place in season 4 where him and reader are dating already. Reader has noticed how awkward he has been around Nancy and vice versa. How they’ve been talking a lot more (good thing Eddie was there to keep them company😉). [full request here]  
- Anonymous asked: Hello babes, I'm not sure if you want to write this but may I request for a Steve Harrington angst to fluff fic? Haha! I just want to torture myself again with all these angsty stories. Somewhere around, reader is pining for steve and thought that she have a chance with steve but the latter thought that maybe he's still not over nancy. Reader felt hurt / embarassed by this and decided to date someone else, when she did steve realizes that she's the one that his heart has been longing for the whole time and not nancy. Thanks
Warnings: pretty angsty and Steve is kind of an asshole but also a jealous asshole xD and Jason (he deserves his own warning) let me know if I missed anything 
Disclaimer: I don’t own Stranger Things :) gif isn’t mine :D  
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You Keep Me Hangin’ On
Set me free why don't you, babe Get out my life why don't you, babe 'Cause you don't really love me You just keep me hangin' on
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You had known for a long time now. You had just, for some reason, held on to a stupid little hope that kept you hanging to this stupid little crush. Although it wasn't that little. And that voice in your head that kept you hanging sounded an awful lot like Robin insisting that Steve felt the same way you did.
You tried to believe her. You really did. Steve was very caring and affectionate towards you. You remembered the first time you drove him home, drunk, and he asked you to stay with him. And you did. And he said it felt nice to not wake up alone. And then, it became a natural thing between the two of you. He would call you whenever he needed you. And you would call him whenever you needed him. And he showed up. He always showed up. Which made you believe Robin when she said he felt the same way you did. But neither of you spoke about it. You hugged. You kissed. You did more than kiss. You couldn't imagine your life without him. But you weren't entirely sure if he could do the same. You feared that he could. He could live without you.
And right now, it was more evident than ever. You instantly dove into the water when he was pulled back into the lake. You pulled the bats off him and fought them with whatever you could find before Nancy, Robin, and Eddie also appeared to help. You were about to help him stop the bleeding right before Nancy ripped off the bottom of her blouse and started patching him up. And you saw it. You saw the way Steve looked at her.
"You're bleeding" you were snapped out of your thoughts when you heard Eddie by your side.
"Huh?" you asked, confused.
"Your arm" he pointed out. "It's bleeding" he repeated and you looked down to see that he was right. You hadn't even noticed. You were bleeding. Badly.
"Holy shit!" you panicked a little, not really knowing what to do.
"Here" he said, gently grabbing your hand and taking the black bandana out of his back pocket.
"Oh, I don't want to stain your bandana. I know that's your favorite one" you told him, not really noticing the smile that appeared on his face when you did.
"Don't be ridiculous, princess. It's just a piece of fabric" he insisted, grabbing your hand and cleaning your wound gently. You lifted your head from your arm to watch Eddie as he worked on tightening his bandana around you. You found yourself smiling a little at how careful he was being. He did not seem like the loud, careless guy you always saw in school. "How's that? Is it too tight?" he asked, worriedly.
"N-no. That's perfect" you smiled. "Thank you, Eddie" you told him.
"You know, it was pretty badass, w-what you did" he chuckled.
"It was?" you asked, feeling a little nervous for some reason. You never really thought of yourself as badass enough to get that credit from Eddie Munson, who you considered to be one of the most badass people you knew.
"Yeah, I mean, jumping in the lake and fighting those bats. That was metal, princess" he smirked.
"You also jumped in the lake and fought those bats, Eddie" you reminded him.
"Yeah, but after all of you ladies did" he insisted.
"Well, you still did" you told him. "And that says a lot" you smiled.
"So, uh" Eddie cleared his throat, pulling away from you a little. "This place is like Hawkins, but with monsters and nasty shit?"
"Yeah, pretty much" you nodded.
"Wait, watch out for the vines" Nancy said as Robin started walking around. "It's all a hive mind" she explained.
"It's all a what?" Robin asked.
"All the creepy crawlies around here" you told her. "They're, like, one or something" you told her. "Step on a vine, you're stepping on a bat" you instructed. "You're stepping on Vecna" you finished.
"Shit" Eddie said, next to you.
"But everything from our world is still here, right? Except people?" Robin asked.
"As far as I understand it, yeah" Steve said.
"So, theoretically, we could go to the police station and steal guns and grenades and whatever we need to blow up those bat things that are guarding the gate" Robin suggested.
"I highly doubt the Hawkins PD has grenades, Robin" you told her. "But guns, yeah, sure."
"Well, we don't have to go all the way downtown for guns" Nancy added and everyone looked at her. "I have guns in my bedroom" she shrugged.
"You, Nancy Wheeler" Eddie started. "...have guns, plural, in your bedroom?"
"Full of surprises, isn't she?" Robin asked, excitedly.
"A Russian Makarov and a revolver" Nancy explained.
"Yeah, you almost shot me with that one" Steve said.
"You almost deserved it" Nancy smirked back at him.
You tried to hide your upset expression but Eddie seemed to notice before he threw his jean vest at Steve and he glared back at him a little.
"For your modesty, dude" he said, making Steve roll his eyes before putting it on.
"Hey, are you okay?" Steve asked, walking closer to you.
"I'm fine" you said with a firm smile.
"Did you hurt yourself?" he questioned, looking at your arm.
"Yeah, but don't worry. Eddie fixed it" you told him.
"Oh" Steve said, not entirely loving that part. "O-okay" he sighed.
"Are you okay?"
"Yeah, just a scratch" he said, trying to make you laugh.
You barely smiled before you followed Eddie and Robin who were climbing on trees and rocks, careful not to step on the vines. When Robin accidentally stepped on a vine, the five of you felt the Earth moving under you when an earthquake happened. Your instinct almost made you run to Steve, but you saw he quickly grabbed Nancy, who was closer to him, and he pulled her to his side. You couldn't even register the whole thing before you felt two arms grabbing you and making you fall to the ground with him as you felt Eddie's arms tighten around you.
"Holy shit!" you heard Robin, not so far from you.
"So guns seem like a pretty good idea to me" Eddie said.
"Yeah, me too" you said, feeling your cheeks burn a little at how close you were to the metalhead and not noticing a pair of eyes glaring your way. "Uh- um" you cleared your throat. "Thanks" you smiled shyly.
"Don't mention it, princess" he said, helping you up.
*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
As the five of you walked to the Wheeler's house, Steve could barely register what Nancy was telling him. His eyes were glued to Robin, you, and Eddie walking ahead of them. Specifically between you and Eddie Munson. He noticed he was trying to make you laugh because he could see the worried look on your face. And the worst part was that he was succeeding. He didn't like the feeling he got whenever you laughed at something Eddie Munson said. He didn't like that you had his bandana on your arm. He didn't like that he was walking a little too close to you and the worst part was when he saw his hand trying to reach for yours.
"Uh, yeah, Nance, hold on a second" he said, not even trying to understand what she was talking about as he ran over to the trio in front of him.
"Hey, Eddie" Steve said, catching up with you. "Uh, could I... talk to you?" he asked, making Eddie look at you a little confused. You simply shrugged and Robin pulled you away to go join Nancy instead, leaving the two boys behind.
"What's up, Harrington?"
"Hey, man. Uh... Listen, I just, uh... I just want to say thanks. For saving my ass back there" he smiled.
"Shit. You saved your own ass, man" Eddie told him. "I mean, that was a real Ozzy move you pulled back there!"
"Ozzy?"
"When you took a bite out of that bat. Ozzy Osbourne? Black Sabbath? He bit a bat's head off onstage" he explained as Steve looked at him confused.
"I don't-"
"You know? Doesn't matter" he shrugged. "It's very metal, what you did. That's all I'm saying" he told him.
"Thanks" Steve smiled.
"Henderson told me you were a badass. Insisted on the matter, in fact" he explained.
"Henderson said that?"
"Oh yeah" Eddie nodded.
"Shit!"
"Kid worships you, dude. Like, you have no idea. It's kinda annoying, to be honest" he mocked Steve. "I don't even know why I care what that little shrimp thinks, but, uh, guess I got a little jealous, Steve" he smirked. "I guess I couldn't accept the fact that Steve Harrington was actually a good dude. Rich parents, popular, chicks love him. Not a douche? No way, man. No way" he chuckled. "That, like, flies in the face of all the laws in the universe and my own personal Munson doctrine" he explained, making Steve laugh and roll his eyes a little. "Still super jealous as hell, by the way. Which is why I would never have jumped in that lake to save your ass. Not under any, uh... normal circumstances. Nope. Outside of D&D, I am no hero. I see danger and I just turn heel and run. Or at least that's what I've learned about myself this week" he muttered the last part.
"Give yourself a break, man" Steve insisted.
"See? The only reason I came in here was 'cause those ladies came in straight after you. Now, I was too ashamed to be the one who stayed behind" he explained. "But, your girl, right there" Eddie said, pointing at you, walking ahead of them. "She didn't waste a second. Not one second. She just dove right in" he told Steve as they stopped walking for a moment and Steve looked at you while you walked with Robin. "Now, I don't know what's going on or what happened between you two, but if I were you, I would not take her for granted, man. 'Cause that was as unambiguous a sign of true love as these cynical eyes have ever seen" he told her. "And if you let her go, someone else might not be so stupid" he informed him.
"Are you talking about... someone in specific?" Steve asked, glaring a little at him.
"Maybe" Eddie shrugged, patting his back. "I'm just saying, Harrington. Don't be the douche I always thought you were" he said before he walked away from Steve.
As soon as you all got to Nancy's place, she, Robin, and Eddie started making their way upstairs. You were about to follow them when Steve gently pulled you back.
"Hey" Steve said, smiling nervously at you, a few steps down. "Uh- I just... um, I wanted to ask if uh-" he said, running a hand through his hair as he always did when he was nervous. "If w-we're okay? I mean, are you- uh are you feeling okay?"
"Are you?" you asked, a little confused.
"No- yeah, uh I'm fine" he sighed. "I just wanted to check if you were also... fine?"
"I'm fine" you said with a firm smile before you turned around and you tried going upstairs but Steve stopped you again.
"It's just um... you got hurt" he said, stroking the back of your hand with his thumb as he looked at the bandana wrapped around your arm.
"So did you" you told him. "And I think yours is... much worse" you said, looking at Nancy's blouse wrapped around him.
"No, it's fine" he insisted.
"Great. So, you're fine. I'm fine. We're both..." you sighed. "Just fine" you said.
"What's that supposed to mean?" he asked, frowning.
"Uh- nothing" you quickly said. "We should... get up there-"
"No, what did you mean by that?"
"Steve, this isn't the time or the place-"
"But you're upset!"
"No, I'm not, I just told you, everything is fine!" you insisted.
"Really? So, if everything is fine, why are you spending so much time with Munson?" Steve asked, accusingly.
"Ohh, you noticed that? I figured you'd be too busy with Nancy to even pay attention to anyone else!" you replied.
"Wait, is that what this is about?"
"No! I didn't mean to ugh-! Just... forget about it, okay? We have bigger things to-"
"Shhh!" he shushed you, holding up his finger.
"Um, excuse me?"
"Did you hear that?" he asked, looking the other way and walking away from you.
"Hear what?"
"Henderson!" he said, walking around the empty room.
"Well, it finally happened. He snapped" you muttered under your breath.
"HENDERSON!"
"What's going on?" Nancy asked, walking over to you with Robin, and Eddie.
"I don't know. He thinks he can hear Dustin-"
"I don't think! I can hear him! HENDERSON!"
And then, you heard it.
"Oh, my God! DUSTIN!"
"There has to be a way for them to hear us!" Eddie insisted as the five of you tried to look around the room.
"Wasn't there a way that Will communicated with Joyce when he was here?" Steve asked you, pointing his flashlight at the light in the middle of the living room.
"THE LIGHTS!"
*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
"You sure you're okay?"
"Yes, Robin, for the fifteenth time, I'm okay" you replied as you two tried to grab anything you could use at the War Zone.
"It's just that you and Steve have barely spoken since-"
"Since he decided to stay back at the UpsideDown because Nancy was cursed by Vecna and he now refuses to leave her side?" you snapped a little. "Sorry" you sighed. "There's just... a lot going on right now" you told her.
"I know that, but... well, you and Eddie on the other hand-"
"What?" you asked, confused.
"Come on, you can't tell me that there's nothing there-" she chuckled.
"There's literally nothing there" you laughed. "I don't think Eddie likes me that way" you rolled your eyes.
"Do you like him that way?" she asked, curiously.
"N-no" you said, nervously. "I don't know. Like I said, there's too much going on right now. And Eddie has been nice to me. He's always nice to me and... I don't know this isn't the time to focus on stupid guys, okay?"
"Love, it's never the time to focus on stupid boys" she laughed, making you laugh a little too but she quickly stopped when she spotted Vickie on the other side of the War Zone with her boyfriend.
"Rob" you said, feeling sorry and placing your hand on her arm.
"Have you ever felt like someone just ripped out your heart?" she asked, looking back at you.
You smiled sadly at her and then looked past her. "Yeah, I... have an idea" you said silently and she followed your stare to see Steve laughing with Nancy at something she had said. "Aw, well that's fun for me" you smiled, sarcastically. "I'm gonna go over there, okay?" you quickly said, walking away from Robin as she rolled her eyes and walked over to Steve, punching his arm.
"Ouch! What the hell, Buckley?!"
"Well, I wouldn't expect to find you here" you turned around hearing that dreadful voice.
"J-Jason" you said, nervously. "Yeah, well, it's just... scary times" you smiled. "Uh- I'm... sorry about Chrissy" you told him.
"Want my advice?" he asked, getting closer to you. "Shotguns are not good for much of anything past killing small birds" he said. "I mean, they got power, sure, but not much range" he said, as you stepped backwards, creating space between the two of you but he got even closer. "And that's just gonna force you into close-range combat, then someone can just grab that barrel like this..." he said, grabbing the weapon from you. "...and redirect it" he said, smiling, making you feel uneasy. "Well, you look nervous" he chuckled.
"Uh -like I said" you tried to smile. "Scary times" you told him. "Could you let go, please?"
"Sorry?"
"She said 'let go'" you heard Steve behind you and you let out a sigh of relief.
"Harrington" he said, letting go of the gun. "Didn't see you there" he said, stepping away.
"Well, now you do so..." Steve said, nodding his head so he would take the hint.
"Lovely seeing you" Jason said, before turning to look back at you.
"Hey, you okay-?"
"We need to go, now" you said, grabbing his hand.
"But-"
"But nothing" you said, pulling him with you. "Eddie's outside" you whispered.
"Right" Steve muttered a bit upset. Munson.
*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
"Hey" you were snapped out of your thoughts when Eddie sat down on the grass, next to you.
"Hi" you smiled.
"So... I guess this is a dumb question but... how are you feeling?"
"Funny, I was just going to ask you the same thing" you smiled.
"Me? I'm having the time of my life, princess. Are you kidding me? We're about to go to the UpsideDown and fight for our lives, really... it's where I pictured my life at this point, he chuckled, making you laugh a little.
"You know, you don't have to do this, Eddie" you insisted.
"Are you trying to rob me of my hero arc, princess?" he said, making you laugh, which you didn't know how was possible with how anxious you were feeling. "I was just going to tell you the same thing" he told you.
"It's just... you've been through a lot in like... what, 48 hours?"
"Yeah, it's been intense but... well, you being here kinda makes it better" he admitted.
"It does?" you asked, feeling your cheeks burn.
"Yeah" he insisted. "I mean, if... it were up to me, I wouldn't want the situation of us hanging out to be in a creepy world fighting this... monster but... I guess it's pretty badass" he chuckled.
"Well, if it involves you I would assume it would have to be badass" you smiled, making him blush a little. "So... if it were up to you... what would the situation be? U-us hanging out?"
"Well- uh-"
"Hey, Munson!" Steve said, suddenly appearing and interrupting the two of you. "Um... Henderson's asking for you" he said.
"Um- sure" Eddie said, looking back at you. "Sorry, princess. Raincheck?"
"Sure" you smiled as he got up and he helped you up too. "See you in a bit" you told him before Steve replaced his place.
"What was that?"
"What was what?" you asked, confused.
"You and Munson?"
"We were just talking" you shrugged.
"Is there something going on between the two of you?"
"What? What are you talking about, Steve?"
"I just find it interesting that every time I look at you he just happens to be there" he said, glaring at you a little.
"Well, maybe we were just talking about our part of the plan, since you made me stay back with him and Dustin!"
"I knew you were upset about that! Nancy and I just decided this was the best way to make the teams!"
"Oh, what a lovely coincidence that you get to go with Nancy!"
"And Robin!" he added. "Why does that make you so upset? Because you don't get to come and physically kill Vecna with us? I need you to stay back with Eddie and Dustin!"
"Why? Because you don't trust me as much as Nancy!? You don't-" you stopped yourself before you could say 'You don't love me as much as you love Nancy'.
"Nancy knows what she's doing!"
"Oh, and I don't? We were all down there, Steve! And in case you didn't notice, I was the first one to jump when you were dragged back into that lake! Not Nancy! I am just as capable as she is-!"
"I didn't say you weren't but I just..." he sighed, running a hand through his hair, frustrated. "I need you to stay back with Dustin and Eddie okay?"
"Fine!" you said, reluctantly. "I can't do this anymore Steve" you sighed.
"Sweetheart, I know it'll be hard, but we have this plan and-"
"No, not that! This!" you said pointing at him and yourself. "I am tired of just being your option when Nancy is not around!"
"That's not true and this isn't the time to-"
"Right... it's never the time" you sighed.
"Well, not when we're about to go face Vecna in the fucking UpsideDown!"
"You're going to face Vecna with Nancy and Robin! I'm staying back with Eddie and Dustin!"
"That's not how it is!"
"Yes, it is! That's the plan that you two came up with! Together!"
"Look, what do you want from me? It made more sense this way!"
"Just admit that you still have feelings for Nancy and be done with it so I can just... I don't know, move on!"
"M-move on? From us?"
"There is no us, Steve! Is there?"
"Why would you say that?"
"I don't know, Steve! I'm tired! I'm tired and I can't do this anymore! It's not fair!"
"Ugh! I'm not trying to make you feel like this on purpose! I don't have feelings for Nancy, okay? Why does everyone think that I still have feelings for Nancy?"
"Oh, really? Everyone thinks so? So, I'm not the only one then!" you said, feeling your heart starting to break.
"No! I didn't mean it like that! Nancy is my friend! Okay! That is it! I care about her and I don't want her to die!"
"Nobody wants her to die, Steve! But you keep following her around like a lost puppy-!"
"How would you even know since you decided to stay with Munson every chance you get?! I can't believe you're being this dramatic over Nancy. SHE'S MY FRIEND!" he snapped. "Look, I don't want to fight with you, we are all on edge, and... I just... I need to do this, and I need you to stay with Dustin and Munson!"
"I don't want to fight with you either, Steve, and I know this is probably the worst possible time, I just-"
"Hey, guys!" Dustin shouted, interrupting you. "Time to go!"
Steve sighed, tiredly and looked back at you, not really knowing what else to say, so you did.
"You know what? You're right, we have more important things to deal with right now" you smiled with tears in your eyes and you placed your hand on his arm. You were about to follow Dustin but Steve pulled you back, pulling your hand.
"Listen, I care about Nancy, yes. Of course, I do. But, I swear, she's just my friend" he told you. "And I care about you too. I do, a lot" he said, nervously. But something wasn't letting you believe him anymore.
"As a friend?" you asked, with your voice breaking a little.
"It's... complicated" he said, making your heart break into little pieces. "And I swear we'll talk about it, after this, I just-" he sighed, running a hand through his hair.
Something was telling you that he would never love you as he did Nancy. That little voice was becoming louder than Robin's telling you he loved you just as you loved him. And you felt your eyes watering. And you knew he could see it, but he didn't say anything. Because you knew time was running out and you had to follow Dustin. So you just smiled sadly at Steve and cupped his cheek with your hand.
"I love you, Steve" you whispered, having the strangest feeling in your heart that this may be the only chance you would get to tell him this, so you kissed his cheek. Like you always did and you gave him the saddest smile Steve had ever seen on someone. "And I really hope you get her back someday."
To Be Continued
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[Part 2] 
A/N: sooo, I am definitely not evil enough to just leave it there :D this is definitely going to have a part two... so let me know what you think xD (and also, who you think she should stay with) 
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camryntheking · 2 months
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Season 4 reaction
I might just do this for every season cos i need to rant (Autism things. Iykyk).
Ok. 4x03. The whole Eddie and Hildy thing is so fucking funny. And Buck and Chris teaming up to get the coffee maker is so domestic. I love it so much lmao
And naturally i watched 9-1-1: Lone Star 2x03. Ive seen some episodes so i have some knowledge about the characters, but not much. But its so funny. TK always knew lmao
Then we have 4x05. Buck Begins. Man i almost cried so many times. I knew about the Daniel thing but i didnt know the whole story and. Whew. Its a lot. But im glad he has the 118 and Athena to help him and to be his family. Maddie to. I can see both of their sides tho. But when Buck got the clean bill of health Eddie was just like a husband waiting for him to come home lmao. I love them so much. And the ending scene with Maddie and Buck is so sweet 🥹
And i know its not my usual topic, but in 4x07, the whole plot with David, Michael, and Bobby is so funny. I dont know much about Michael’s storyline, so i am actually clueless as to how it turns out. But the three of them are so great together and i hope to see more!
4x08. I know some about Taylor. So the fact she is back is making me 😠. And she did not have to call Buck out like that. Homeboy has been through some shit and is trying to figure it out. But Buck and Chris’ friendship is so pure and i love them so much❤️❤️
4x11. Athena’s “dont even think about it Buck” has me CACKLING. She is such a mom to him and its amazing
And Jealous Eddie in 4x12 with the treasure hunt? Homeboy does NOT like Taylor (cant blame him tho). And Chim and Hen’s friendship is fucking amazing. But the whole 118 trying to find the treasure is so funny. The fact that Ravi found it first tho? I love that man
4x13. Eddie is already having doubts about Ana. Homeboy does not like women and you cannot convince me otherwise. And the scene of Eddie getting shot made me cry. I can definitely see why people think that this is where the Buddie arc was supposed to happen. Cos they held eye contact and Eddie reached out for Buck. And that could be seen as platonic but knowing everything we do, it just seems like it was a set up for a romantic arc
And 4x14 starts with Buck crawling under a fire truck to get to Eddie. Without a second thought, he rolled under a firetruck, the thing that caused so much trauma, to get to Eddie. And Eddie was so concerned that Buck was hurt even though he was the one bleeding. And i guess Taylor can have her good moments. But the scene where Buck tells Chris what happened breaks my heart. He was trying to hold it together for Chris but once he knew that Eddie made it through surgery? He couldnt hold in his emotions. And then when they are talking about the will. Its so soft between them. And Eddie just knows that Buck wouldnt say no to taking in Chris. And i think that just shows how close of a bond they have. This was totally a set up for a romantic arc, but of course F*x had to shut that down 😒
“Because, Evan” 😭😭😭
And i love that Albert is gonna be a firefighter. I love that man
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punkbarbarian · 1 year
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second chances, gregory alan isakov / @punkbarbarian & @creacherkeeper / night walk, franz wright / @creacherkeeper / cowboy like me, taylor swift / @punkbarbarian / you are jeff, richard siken / the undone cowboy writes to his sweetheart, silas denver melvin / @punkbarbarian / wolf like me, tv on the radio
the mercenery and the criminal
[image id: 10 screenshots of text on varying color backgrounds.
1: "i could share it with you, if you gave me the time / i'm all bloody knuckles, longing for a home / if it weren't for second chances we'd all be alone"
2: two discord messages. the first reads "“i’m glad you’re here.” will speaks into scruggs’ shoulder. he is not letting go anytime soon." the second, from luka (he/they), reads "scruggs wraps his arms around will's back. "me too." he pauses for a while. "it was long time ago. but is why you can't say that name outside house. when i … got out … was big news. safe here in lost, but … good to be careful."
3: "walking home, for a moment / you almost believe you could start again. / and an intense love rushes to your heart, / and hope. it's unendurable, unendurable."
4: "He could come off intimidating, whether he wanted to or not. But the right people would know him for who he really was beneath."
5: "[verse 3] now you hang from my lips / like the gardens of babylon / with your boots beneath my bed / forever is the sweetest con"
6: "It would’ve been easy for this to be a one-off, emotionless physical relationship. That’s what Will had expected. It’s what he had become accustomed to in the past decade. But there was something about Ivan that drew him in. Inextricably, there seemed to be something about him that drew Ivan in, too."
7: "choke down the feeling, and you're trembling, but he reaches over and he touches you, like a prayer for which no words exist, and you feel your heart taking root in your body, like you've discovered something you don't even have a name for."
8: "i'll skin you an apple / tight between the knife & my thumb, / if you let me feed you every slice. / that's the only paradise i can offer you. / (i'm sorry-it's what i have-it's what it is)"
9: "scruggs putting the past in the past vs will still holding onto it so hard even tho its been so long."
10: "[bridge] dream me, oh dreamer, down to the floor / open my hands and let them weave onto yours / feel me, completer, down to my core / open my heart and let it bleed onto yours / feeding on fever, down on all fours / show you what all the howling is for" /end id.]
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weaselishmcdiesel · 7 months
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In my defense, the accidental lie has been going on for 4 years and each time I run into HS content I send it to this guy... which probably has worsened the lie, so like at this point I might as well go out with a bang
Also please please do give me more info on other characters you feel comfortable with, cuz we weren't sure what we were gonna play so we are doing 3 one-shots (Im DMing all 3, pain) before setting on one, so it might be a bit extra suspicious if only 1 homestuck npc shows up and I don't know enough about Nepeta to confidently make her show up 3 times and make it seem like she's my fav and I know all about her
This shit is so funny hshfjfjgjgj I do hope you manage to sneak by undetected if only so you can say you did such a good job pretending that you fooled a real fan XD and hopefully your friends a good sport
And sure! Maybe I can help strengthen those characters you say you know? They’re the more popular ones so I sorta know more about them than others.
I WROTE THIS IN MY NOTES APP THIS IS SUPER LONG ACTUALLY AND IM SO SORRY TRY TO SKIM IT <- was asked to talk about homestuck and thought was be able to keep it brief. Wasn’t.
Karkat - I was obsessed with him then and I’m obsessed with him now he’s a loud whining piece of shit with a pretty bad attitude. Mainly a character based on him would yell as their normal speaking volume, swear a LOT and also creatively, but is also hiding an insecurity. The thing about him is he has a mutant blood color that would get him killed on his planet- so he can’t let anyone find out, he can’t accidentally bleed or cry (tears are their blood color) in front of anyone. So maybe your character is also hiding something super important? He gets along best with people who don’t really take his bitching to heart since his bitching is his way of showing real concern- he does actually care about his friends no matter how many times he calls them idiots. Also is really interested in romance as a concept and likes romcoms. He uses dual sickles as a weapon- I figure you may want this information since they’re dnd characters.
Dave - Cool kid, sunglasses he never takes off, he raps and makes beats on his turntables. He’s obsessed with irony and sorta doesn’t know how to enjoy anything without being ironic about it? Enjoys frustrating people WITH his irony. I struggle with characterizing him bc I’ve consumed a lot of fanon, but maybe that will make your presentation of him more authentic XD? A safe bet is to make your character kinda deadpan in tone but still be able to crack jokes and act pretty silly. If given the opportunity to be the hero he will not take it, he rejects the idea that he should be anyone important. He fights with swords and has a tendency to break them- but still uses them anyway. He gets the power to time travel later on, and can stop a person in time too, dunno how you’d implement that tho.
Vriska - … very very tough for me to summarize her… but I can say that a character based off her has killed one friend, paralyzed one friend, and blinded one friend, but then feel little to no remorse about any of it because they believe they’re the main character and nothing bad will happen to them since it’s all part of their story (though, she blinded that one person because that person blew up her left arm and left eye BECAUSE vriska killed that one friend). Ahem. Got carried away. Your character just did some pretty bad shit that makes them seem untrustworthy. She’s very lucky tho- it’s part of her powers- so your character should be too. She has a spider motif but it only really manifests in her adoration for spiders and her way of typing, so you may not have to worry about that. She’s popularly called the “huge 8itch” if that helps. She fights by rolling die? And depending on how they land they’ll do more or less damage. I don’t really know the specifics? But her luck powers enable her to roll exactly what she wants every time
Rose - rose is also tough for me… she’s a writer and can use a lot of big words and constructs sorta needlessly complicated sentences but she’s got a lot of wit and loves being sarcastic. She’s.. gothy? Has an interest in the occult and occult myths and she’s also pretty fascinated by wizards but I think tries to be lowkey about it? She’s a very smart and clever person too- so much so that in fanon people tend to forget she’s also kinda silly. Sorry that’s all I can say ^^; she fights using a pair of knitting needles- eventually they can also conduct magic and do damage that way. The power she gets later on is- sorta like knowing the future? She can only know the GOOD outcome but she knows specifics so that she can tell her team how they can end up getting the good outcome- she’s the strategist of the group
John - the leader of the kids! suuuper cheery and has the ability to pretty much make friends with anyone. He ends up being naive tho and may not realize when someone is trying to take control of him. He’s very interested in pranks and overall being a silly goofster ✨ if it ever comes up under no circumstances will he eat baked confections. No cakes especially. He loooves Nicolas cage and ghostbusters and some other older movies I can’t remember- other characters just tend to say he likes bad movies but he adamantly believes they’re very good. So maybe your character can also defend something that may objectively be kinda bad? His iconic weapon class is hammers 💪💪 but he also gets wind powers later- he can summon tornados or even fade into air to travel in the wind and appear somewhere else
It may be helpful to point out for nepeta- she has a best friend who’s very concerned about her well-being, equius. He even so much as controls what she can and can’t do (kinda only about certain things that are super dangerous). I don’t really like him as a character, but your npc might be hesitant to do something before asking their best friend for permission. He’s a stickler and very no-nonsense and will likely deny anything too dangerous? But also he’s incredibly terrifyingly physically strong- so your pcs wouldn’t win a fair fight with him. He also sucks up to any royalty. If any pc is royalty he’ll do anything they say. A trademark of his is that he gets very sweaty very easily and also very much likes horses. Also he likes milk. Idk. Nepeta’s weapons are these retractable claw glove things- and equius WOULD use a bow and arrow but breaks every single bow he picks up because he can’t control his strength. Instead, he fights with his fists 👍
Very quick rundown of the main characters I haven’t mentioned yet-
TROLLS
(they’re all kinda friends but I point out their most important relationships, ones your pcs may ask about, they’re also ordered from lowest to highest class) kept these summaries vague so you can insert your npcs in their place?
Aradia - she’s dead don’t worry about her, if asked she was into roleplay, archaeology, and adventuring. friends with Terezi, dated sollux, killed by vriska if you need to know
Tavros - he’s the one who’s paralyzed from the waist down, he has no confidence whatsoever, likes the troll equivalent of Pokémon, has a bull motif, has lots of conflicting feelings about vriska (is constantly manipulated by her), and is friends with Gamzee. Attacks with a jousting spear
Sollux - likes coding and computers, has a red and blue and duality motif, speaks with a lisp, also likes bees a lot. Will not eat honey if asked tho, friends with karkat and hates Eridan. Dates Aradia and feferi. Attacks with his very strong telepathic powers, could kill him if he’s over exerted
Karkat - friends with sollux, kanaya, Jade, has a crush on Terezi but is normal about being friends with her, and is sorta chill with Gamzee and Eridan. Dates Dave but really really hated him to begin with so be careful, may say he hates Dave if asked- they date late into homestuck… would say he hates everyone if asked. Except kanaya
Nepeta - BEST friends with equius, kinda friends with Terezi? Roleplayed with her sometimes but terezi’s a little mean about it cant tell
Kanaya - she’s a very reliable friend, but fears she’s too meddlesome. interested in fashion and is also a vampire 👍 very good friends friends with karkat and dates rose (do not separate) Hates Gamzee and Eridan if asked. Attacks with a chainsaw that can also transform into lipstick
Terezi - LAWFUL whatever your character is theyre lawful. Loves dragons and she’s blind but she can smell/taste colors to the point where she can kinda see? She has something very complicated going on with vriska (she’s the one vriska blinded, but still sorta loves her as a friend). Attacks with a blade concealed in her walking stick
Vriska - she lost her left arm and eye but she gets a robot arm. Has something complicated with Tavros (kinda crushes on him kinda hates him) and Terezi, turned down a confession from Eridan (but he asks out everyone so it’s not that big a deal) but they were friends in the past
Equius - ehhhh I don’t like him idk he has a crush on Aradia and it’s weird, big thing about him is he makes robots idk. Brutally protective of nepeta- they’re best friends
Gamzee - stoner who’s (and I mean this literally) religiously devoted to clowns- wears face paint all the time and has clown horns everywhere for him to honk. Friends with tavros and karkat but everyone (but tavros) sorta treats him like a useless stoner when he’s just trying to be friendly (ahem. Until some crazy story stuff goes down but i won’t spoil it in case you read) should not be without his substance for too long or people will die not exaggerating. Attacks with clubs.
Eridan - classist royalty, fish guy pirate, interested in war and strategy, makes fish puns I think. Has a crush on Feferi but they’re supposed to be best friends. Used to be friends with vriska but confessed to her. Hates Sollux bc when Feferi stopped being best friends with Eridan, she went on to date Sollux. He’s rizzless. Completely rizzless. Attacks with a cool harpoon gun. Doesn’t believe in magic if asked.
Feferi - THE empress like she’s as royal as you can get, but she’s in waiting for when the current empress passes. she’s also a fish but she’s not classist- she cares a lot for people and animals and would abolish the ableist classist regime of the planet they live on if she had the power, until then she tends to aquatic animals n stuff (not afraid to kill people if necessary tho, she knows how to survive). Friends with Eridan but only to keep him from killing people, stops being friends him when there are no more people TO kill around. Dates Sollux later. Also makes fish puns. Attacks with a two pronged trident.
Wow this is getting so long I’m so sorry
THE KIDS
I won’t go into the alpha kids or the other set of 12 trolls bc I’m very rough with them and also they’re not as important?
Dave - raised by his older brother who taught him sword fighting but was also super neglectful as a gaurdian and traumatized him with puppets and constant sword training and pranks. All the kids are very good friends with each other so nothing of note there but he goes on to date karkat- if asked tho he canonically was kinda struggling with finding out he was gay, though if your PCs don’t want to deal with that then do what fanon does and ignore that (I also ignore it). He’s also technically siblings with rose but doesn’t share the mom TECHNICALLY. If asked he doesn’t have a mom unless you want me to go into the alpha kids OTL
John - has just a dad who cares about him very much. And if asked regards his late grandmother very fondly. He doesn’t go on to date anyone but he does kinda hate Terezi? Troll romance is complicated I shouldn’t explain it. He’s technically siblings..? With Jade? But they don’t share the grandparents or the dad.
Rose - dates kanaya I’m serious do not separate them. She has a mom who’s an alcoholic but has a pretty humorous oneupmanship going on between them. She’s technically siblings with Dave but doesn’t share the brother
Jade - ok. So. She was raised by an omnipotent dog. Her grandpa died when she was very young and her dog (bec) took care of her. She’s very cheery - even cheerier and sweeter than John but she will not take any shit she’s not naive like him. She’s interested in science and robots and botany she’s very good at growing plants but she lived all alone on an island for most of her life. She always had visions of the future growing up but was never creeped out by them, always staying optimistic. Her main weapon is a rifle- not sure how that translates in dnd? She later gets the power to manipulate space itself- make things massive or very tiny, she gets telepathy and can move objects around at near the speed of light, and can teleport. She also becomes part dog later. I’d say she’s lawful good? Probably easy bet. She’s friends with karkat, kinda friends with Feferi, in one universe she dated an alternate version of Dave- not the Dave your PCs would meet, so if asked I dont think she exactly had a crush on him- I believe they both said their feelings are complicated. Technically siblings with John but like I said don’t share the parents
Forever apologizing for the wall of text. I’m hoping that, having been a dm once myself, you were expecting a lot of info..? No matter what tho I didn’t write as much reading all of homestuck is worth XD
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softbtsickies · 2 years
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For a good a fate
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Where Fate reader Taehyung has to endure a brutal headache after overusing his abilities and ot7 are there for him. 
Or basically I wanted some good old fluffy caretaking and this is my attempt with an idea I had for a while but was unsure about.
♡ sickie: Taehyung 
♡caretakers: ot7: mainly 3Js (can be read as platonic or romantic) 
♡warnings: migraine like symptoms induced by overusing powers, emeto, nose bleeds, character with psychic powers, one sorta implied sex joke (NOT BETWEEN ANY OF THE MEMBERS), idk if it needs a warning but Jimin and Jungkook bath Taehyung if you are uncomfortable with that (he keeps his boxers on tho) 
*Based off season's greetings 2022*
Also, if seems like there’s random information or unneeded explanations that’s because I might make a really miniseries out of this but idk 
And ngl this is definitely not my best work but I really liked the concept and maybe I’m falling back into this, but it’s nearly 4 am and I just wanted to get this up.
anyways enjoy tho x
The cards laid in front of Taehyung blurred, his voice drawling off as his vision mimicked a camera losing focus and all the golds and glitters in the room blended into the same mesh, “The cards show…”
“They show…” Taehyung shut his eyes to stop the wince forming in his throat along with pinching his brows together for a second hoping to ease the pulse winding up behind them to get through this last reading over. The couple on the opposite end of the table held each other tightly with faces caved with uneasy desperation yet also anticipation and Taehyung could feel an edge of guilt make way between the pain working through his skull. Normally, the fate reader would turn every reading into an experience of wonder. Usually talking with a slower, even deeper voice and twisting his sentences into riddles or poetry to bring the most enchanting experience to his clients, but today he couldn’t even finish a sentence with cards that he already knew what was on them. 
The fate reader wasn’t sure why his little store had been so busy today. While preparing to lock up the familiar pressure and wooziness of over using his abilities had started to make their way now in his temple, telling that if he was to even think about working any more his body would be doing the complete opposite of rewarding him and sealed the warning with a couple of droplets of blood dripping from his nose. Right as he flicked them away, he looked out the window to see two figures  frantically making their way towards the entrance with a powerful enough sense of urgency that Taehyung could feel it himself.
It was a young couple. Begging the fate reader for a reading as they had driven two days after hearing about his perfect accuracy and them needing to know if there is a child in their future. While Taehyung found it hard to listen to them through the small waves of light headedness that were crashing over him the sympathetic side of him began to cloud over the voice telling him he was already having symptoms of overworking him self to step back, but he was taking the woman’s hand to sit down.
“The empress,” A spark of his energy finally returned. “Congratulations, strong fertility is in your future.” 
The couple's face stayed blank for a second before breaking into a shared squeal, leaping for each other. The scene did light something warm in Taehyung’s heart, but the noises also felt like a bullet to the brain if Tae was allowed to indulge in the dramatic tone in the room.
“God thank you, thank you so much.” The man turned to face him and the smile on his face was enough for Taehyung to feel the strain building behind his eyes was worth working past him limits. “While I guess we should try to quickly make it home then, thank you so much again.”
Slumping back into his chair, the fate reader was just greatfull he didn’t have to finish the rest of the reading and come up with an explanation for the rest of the cards sitting on the table. Maybe if had been a different day Tae would have willed the couple to stay, tell them that the cards were rigged and mostly for display (as well as if a bad reading was to happen all the blame fell on the cards or what ever the client wanted him to use in his readings) and the real fortune-telling came from the man himself when he touched the women’s hand when he led her to sit and actually saw a little baby bundle up in the man’s arms while a clear second one was on the way (It would have a priceless moment to see what could have been even more sparkles and joy in their eyes at what he actually saw.) Really he just put the cards with the empress first and hoped when they found out the card was associated with maternal influence that would be enough for them to leave because the idea of slamming his head onto the table to pass out for the rest of the week was getting too tempting. 
Looking into someone’s future for something specific always took way much 
energy than just getting a quick glance into their fortune.
And then it hit Taehyung that he still needed to finish locking up. Taehyung whined to himself, this will take a while. 
(I Did not mean for the intro to be this long, sorry) 
~
“Taetae you’re home!” Jimin was the first to notice Taehyung step into the living room entrance, being greeted by Jimin, Jungkook, Hoseok, a blasting tv and lights on everywhere in the house (pretty much a garage hide out)like it  had known of Taehyung’s carelessness for his limits and also wanted to join in the tournament plaguing his forehead. 
“Tae, it took you longer than usual to get home, is everything okay dear?” He didn’t even notice Hoseok had gotten up or that he was holding his face till the strategist spoke. 
His normal twenty-minute walk home had become a good forty minutes after having to stop every couple of minutes at different bus stops to sit because he felt if he continued on the word would slip away from underneath his feet, not including the five minutes it took for him to finally make up the courage to endure opening the garage door up plus adding another five minutes of him squatting on the floor and holding his head to stop himself from passing out from the throbbing induced from the noises of the door opening. 
Tae tried to gently shake his hands off, “Wanted to go past the river, m’m ok just tired.” He tried to turn away, feeling something start to drip down his nose again, but Hoseok still cupped his cheeks to inspect him.  
“Hey wait, you have a bit of…. oh.” the pad of the strategist’s thumb lightly grazed above Taehyung’s lip, while his expression faltered into serious yet concerned demeanour. Hoseok then brought his hand up to Tae’s temple for him to lean into. “You overused again.” Taehyung made a small whineand nodded to fall deeper into the older's palm with a sigh and closed eyes. He heard a gasp from Jimin and cracked one eye open enough to see Jimin ogle for the remote to turn the tv off while Jungkook swiftly got up to dim the lights.
Hoseok moved his hand away (much to Taehyung’s dismay) muttering a “Oh Taehyungie what are we going to do with you?” and wrapped it around the fate reader's waist to rest it on his stomach, taking Taehyung’s hand with his other one mouthing “Do you want to go to the couch?” stroking his thumb against Tae’s knuckles, who nodded back listlessly. 
“Mmm sorry, it was a young couple ann’d they drove two days to-see me.” Taehyung paused, the small journey was enough to make the room start feeling a little lopsided again. “They really wanted to know if there is children in their future.” 
Hoseok made a sympathetic hum and rubbed at Taehyung’s shoulder, helping him make his way to the last couple steps before the sofa, “Your hearts too big for your good.” Hoseok spoke softly, “Are you nauseous at all, still dizzy?” He whispered, with the news of him having a headache he could expect everyone to be speaking in hushed tones for the time being. 
“Still a little dizzy, I just want the world to stop for a moment.” Tae sat down, bringing his head to rest in his hands, and Jimin wrapped his arm loosely around Taehyung’s upper torso. 
“Do you perhaps want a bath Taehyungie, you know, to wash the dirt and fates of the day away?”  
Taehyung just nodded and felt Jimin’s hold slowly leave him, “Kook come help me.” Jimin whispered and the weight next to him disappeared, but he felt a hand softly pat his hair before the two completely left, “I wish there was more we could do to help you Hyungie.” 
It was true, there wasn’t much that could be down from a headache induced by over using his abilities. Namjoon had once spent hours slaved away try to come up with a remedy for both when Seokjin would get tension headaches after spending hours looking at his computer since no medication was working enough and to aid Taehyung’s overuse ‘migraines’ as no medication could do anything for him. Thankfully the treatment works wonders for Seokjin and even helps the others through their head pains, but to this day still remained as just a funny tasting liquid for Taehyung.
“My poor Taetae.” The weight in the cough was back, but now with Hobi next to him. Taehyung leaned over and rubbed his face into Hosoek’s upper arm like he could physically rub away the awareness of the fibres of his skin (and the room still felt way too bright.) 
“It’ll pass eventually, Hyung thinks you're so strong for going through this for the couple.” His hand was back on Tae’s shoulder, and Taehyung could only sigh in acknowledgement. “Hey don’t fall asleep yet.” To that the fate reader made another tiny whine and settled into the silence,  occasionally being broken by Taehyung shifting positions, Hoseok cooing at him and a “Tae, the bath is ready.”
The first thing the fate reader noticed about the bathroom was how steamy it had become and the natural light that would normally seep through the window above the bath had been sealed behind one of Taehyung’s canvases with it being just the right fit to leave a tiny bit of light to leak over the top of it to have enough lighting to still see through the room. 
The thought the two put in was honestly enough for Taehyung to want to cry and if it had been in a different circumstance Jimin and Jungkook would probably be making a show of their efforts with ‘Tadas,’ and Jazz hands, though a new surge of wooziness was enough for Taehyung to slightly sway and Jungkook had to grab his arm and slowly lead him over to the closed toilet lid to strip down to his boxers. 
The second Taehyung‘s skin touched the water he let out a shaky breath, a hint of tension left around his neck as he melted into the water, eagerly however still slowly leaning his head against the makeshift towel pillow. “Wait, don’t go too far in yet, Hyung.” Jungkook was grabbing an equally steamy flannel from the sink and kneeled down in front of the bath. He cupped Tae’s cheek and with the faintest movement tilted Taehyung’s face ever so slightly towards him and started to gently wipe at the glitters Tae used to cover the scratch running down his eye, continuing onto lightly scrub at the rest of his daily make up finishing by laying the mildly warm flannel onto Taehyung’s eyes. 
Jimin was next to act, sitting on the tiles that connected the bathtub to the wall, with the shower head on a low but pleasant temperature setting. Jimin began at the base of Taehyung’s forehead, massaging it with one hand then carding his fingers through’s Tae’s curls like they made of the most delicate strands of glass and let the water breeze through them before restarting the massage, occasionally muttering something along the lines of “You’re too kind to do that for the couple, let’s stop getting into this position yeah?” or simply humming a simple breathy tune, Jungkook kept leaning over to urge Taehyung to take a sip of a water bottle or to suck on ice chips the two had also brought up for him. Taehyung felt like he could drift off to the sweetness of it all, but as the water grew colder in the pits of his stomach he could start to feel the rise of the little breakfast he had that morning gradually turn into a churning sensation as well as his throat going a tiny bit warm. “Out now?” Tae could guess Jungkook must have taken notice of the small discomfort in Taehyung position from his sudden twisting to ease the fullness starting to present itself in his tummy. 
Taehyung breathed loudly in confirmation, not ready to jolt his stomach just yet, but Jimin’s hands were already finding their way around Taehyung’s torso, joined by Jungkook’s. “On three okay?” Taehyung nodded and put one arm around his stomach and the other into the side of the bath and pushed him up once Jimin whispered ‘3,’ not to his surprise his head buzzed along with the change in height.
Taehyung grimaced as the flannel fell off his eyes, letting the light still occupying the bathroom shock his eyes enough for him to just stagger a little bit and a hand caught him, stroking his back lovingly. “You did good, kookie brought some of his clothes for you to wear.” He must have zoned out so hard during the duration of the bath, he didn’t even notice the youngest leave. They sat him again onto the closed toilet lid. Jimin taking it upon himself to dry the fate reader while Jungkook put his folded clothes onto Taehyung’s lap, “the loosest I have and no scents.” 
‘They are so precious,’ a small smile formed on Taehyung’s lips. 
It felt hopeless for Taehyung to need Jimin and Jungkook to help him make his way to his bedroom, yet the pair still rubbed his head and patted his back through the hallway with no annoyance on their faces, rather concern, telling him with affection in their voices to sit and not lay down when he wanted to finally crash seeing his bed. 
“First this, then off to bed.” Hobi walked through holding a cup of fresh tea still steaming. Hoseok sweetly curled his lips in sympathy when Taehyung turned his head away from the feeling of his tummy becoming even more turby at the thought of adding anything to it’s already sloshing mixture. 
“Mm, nauseous.” The pain still painfully danced behind Taehyung’s eyes, he tried to suppress it by placing a palm to one of them, but it was no advil. Hoseok sat down next to him, sighing, “You didn’t eat much before you left for work, and you said it was a busy day, it’s better than throwing up bile later.” Taehyung hummed, still looking at the tea and imaging it not settling well at all in his stomach. “Plus, maybe it will actually calm down the nausea for once.“ They always made him drink tea as he had yet to not be left nauseated during an episode. 
Taehyung looked down at the tea, really not being able to stomach it, but if it would get him into his bed quicker with the other three to cuddle him, so be it. 
~
Everything was still blurry when he woke again, Taehyung’s eyes shut on instinct with a groan, feeling his head spin despite his eyes been closed again. The fate reader stopped squirming, feeling a hand brush through his hair, “are you up Tae-bear?” 
Seokjin. 
Taehyung felt his stomach flip, and he rolled over, smushing his face into presumably Seokjin’s thighs, the older’s hand still lacing through his hair. He could also hear the barely there sound of piano blend with a complementary rain noise. 
Yoongi. 
While Yoongi knew how to layer his music with frequencies and notes that could induce a number of symptoms into a person, he had yet to master music that could heal Taehyung’s aliments but it no stretch he knows how to sting along a peace that could at least ease Taehyung into a more comfortable feeling. It playing low enough that everyone in the room had to be quite enough to hear.
Opening one eye, he saw the brightness of Yoongi’s laptop lighting one corner of the room including his Hyung’s face and next to him was Namjoon who noticed the ill man’s glance and gave him a small smile. 
It had to be late now as the other three have a preference for working at night, the exchange must have taken place during Taehyung’s nap with enough care that the three men could untangle from Taehyung and swap with Seokjin to not wake him when they could have just left him for the night. 
He felt the need to whisper a small thank you and reached to hold any part of his Hyung he could, though the timing hit right as Taehyung’s stomach and head throbbed at the same time and his hand dipped to abdomen, it feeling sicker being able to feel his heartbeat under his palm. 
“Tae, how is it feeling?” Namjoon got up. Taehyung could only whimper in repose and squeeze the bedding while the room suddenly started to grow hotter and murky.
No, maybe it was just his throat heating, it gaining a taste of his breakfast at the back of it and his stomach was pacing up its thrashing of it’s contents, even tightening around his muscles. Taehyung pushed himself up into a sitting position, wavering when his forehead gained the same tightness.
Taehyung’s heart in his stomach suddenly leaned into his throat and he groaned, dropping his head to sallow down the feeling of wanting to puff his cheeks out from the taste of saliva filling his mouth. 
“Tae do you think you need…” Taehyung cut Seokjin off by shaking his head not meaning to and wanted to cry from the pulse it shot through his forehead, he just wanted to savour the moment before losing it all but his stomach clenched unsympathetically, and he had to wrap one arm around his stomach and placed the other hand into to his mouth wanting to catch the heave that came from him.
“Oh shit where’s the bin, oh shit sorry Tae.” Namjoon spoke loudly before dropping his voice to whisper, but the damage to Taehyung’s temple had been done, wincing from the exposure of his loud voice that he could compare to an explosion in his skull. He heaved as a reflex, only a tiny bit of drool pooled his mouth, but it was enough to trigger the next wet cough. 
“Okay, you’re okay.” The bin was finally pushed in front of Taehyung in time for the sound of vomit to gurgle up his throat and push him to gag a spray of liquid into it. He hated that the cramps forcing the vomit out of him were comparable to the pressure hitting behind his eye and god there was a second round that cut his breathing break off. 
Taehyung had to cling onto the bin if he didn’t want to fall in, and Seokjin reached for it and brought it closer to him. “Can you two go prepare a broth and flannel.” Jin’s free arm snaked around Taehyung’s stomach to keep him place as the next heave doubled him over in a choke. 
Taehyung made a pained noise when the next gag pulled the last of what ever his stomach could find into the bin, leaving him a now empty yet cramping tummy that Jin’s hand shifted slightly to trace circles over. “Done Taehyungie?” He spat the remaining saliva into the bin and nodded and leaned back, the world was starting to go black around his vision. 
“This one has got you bad.” Seokjin grabbed a glass for Taehyung off the counter, then laid him back down onto the bed once he finished taking a small sip. Jin shifted so his palm was still circling his stomach and the other under the younger head. “It’s so bad.” Taehyung squeezed his eyes for what must have been the hundredth time today, wetness making it down his cheeks. “Maybe it will just be a day long one.” Taehyung scoffed through his tears, “I Haven’t had one take only a day since I was a child.“ 
Fingers come to under his eyes, wiping gracefully, “I’m so sorry we can’t do anything to take the pain away-“
Taehyung butted in,“You being here is enough.” He thought back to how all of them spent the day with him and the loving touches, words of encouragement and the consecrated thought behind the way they cared for him despite him bringing this upon him, sure it couldn’t ease the actual pain in his body, but his heartfelt full enough to settle the discomfort of his headache. 
“That’s a sweet thought.” Seokjin’s finger traced the scratch on Taehyung’s eye, “who ever removed the glitter did a shit job.” He brought his hand back and looked at it with a mocked face of disgust, flicking the speck off, and then smiling when a hint of a giggle came from Taehyung.  
“Broth should be done soon.” Yoongi stood at the door, Namjoon poking his head through as well. 
“Then why are you standing there, come here.” Seokjin moved closer to Taehyung, freeing up space for the others. “And leave it to burn?” Yoongi mumbled back but still came to the bed, “You can sleep with us for a couple of minutes.” Yoongi huffed but still moved next to Seokjin and reached over his hand held onto Taehyung’s arm. 
“Here Tae.” Namjoon motioned for Taehyung to lift his head up and placed a wet cloth where the base of his head would be when he returned to a full laying position and draped the other across Taehyung’s eyes, this time the flannel was cold enough for Taehyung to moan as the hot stickiness of the vomiting spell had yet to part with him. The scientist also crawled into the bed, sure the bed was cramped, but Taehyung couldn't care less, it felt right to have them all with him, it felt too perfect. 
“I love you all.” He whispered and smiled to himself, hearing them all say it back, even if his head still felt on fire he felt fatigue take over his main sense. 
It felt okay, it felt like destiny or even fate that he would end up in his Hyung’s embrace. 
And he was more than fine with that. 
Idk how to end this sorry. 
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dankovskaya · 1 year
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Okayyy another egregiously long sitting where I don’t think I even progressed all that much and I now have some actual (long, very long, unstructured) thoughts on characters and plot etc 👇
Well first of all since this just happened. Ok I love Merrin a lot and I love Cal and I love the unique dynamic that they have together BUT -- and I can accept that I might be one of maybe 5 joyless cunts that feel this way -- I was so hoping there would never be anything actually romantic between them. I love that after fallen order they (and the whole crew!) grew so close and familiar with each other and genuinely love each other etc + the game has been doing a really good job at displaying that familiarity in a convincing and endearing way but I so cannot describe the dread I felt in my stomach when they lingered on her putting her arms around him when they were riding the fucking. SPAMMEL. And I probably rolled my eyes at least 4 times during their little huddling for warmth in the desert cave scene 😭
But it sucks because I literally loved about 93% of their interactions that I’ve seen so far it’s just when there are those little Haha ooooo like-like? like-like? moments I’m just like. Anakin you’re breaking my heart. You’re going down a path I can’t follow. Being dramatic obviously it’s not like it ruins their dynamic or anything and Merrin’s methods of showing affection are so cute that I really don’t care That much in the first place I just can’t help but blame the 90000 star war fans who looked at fallen order and were like OOOOOO they’re in LOOOOVFVVVEEEEEEE 🥰😏🥰😏 literlaly just because they like. Touched hands that one time. And relate to each other as survivors of fucking genocides. What if we all killed ourselves. Whatever. If I’m not crazy and the rest of you also did not really want or expect Merrin to turn into an outright love interest please let me know.
Ok for the actual plot overall this thing with.... Help I already forgot the planet’s name I know it starts with a T. And like Dagan whatever the fuck. I mean. I know nothing about the High Republic era content because I just have never had any interest in it but I’m excited for this guy as a fallen Jedi antagonist and for me the most interesting moment in the game so far was after their first fight when Cal, even after watching him actively bleed his fucking kyber crystal and curse the Jedi Order, was still begging him to stay and help with the fight against the empire because there are so few of them left!!! It’s very different from how he approached Taron Malicos in the first game (from. memory.) and seems very informed by how his mindset has changed after fighting this same fight for so long etc... I was very confused initially tho about Cal’s interest in the lost planet as a potential hiding place from the empire? It made way more sense after he met up with Cere and told her about it and she proposed it could be a refuge for surviving Jedi + force sensitives + their families and I can now buy that as the driving motivation for the rest of the game or whatever but Cal did not mention anything like that 💀 All he seemed to see it as before that was a place where Greez and all his besties and whatever other people he cares about could hide from the empire which seemed incredibly odd because “hiding from the empire” is completely antithetical to all of his beliefs at this point and is quite literally why he had been avoiding the mantis crew for the past however many years? But maybe I just misunderstood something lmfao.
And on that last point I was worried the whole “we haven’t seen each other in a long time but now it’s time to get the gang back together but ooooo there’s some tension something happened....” thing was going to feel very forced and dumb but actually I think Greez Cere and Merrin all having (very respectable) reasons to want to split off and pursue their own goals and Cal being very pissed off about that and lowkey taking it personally because he projected his own mindset and self-enforced obligations onto them so hard that it felt like a betrayal and thus caused a mild amount of resentment which pretty much goes away as soon as he actually has a proper individual conversation with all of them again and is finally able to comprehend their perspectives was really good. Holy shit that was a long sentence. Really tho as soon as I heard that the mantis crew was separated and had to be reassembled I was like ohhhh goddamnit manufactured drama to pad out the playtime but it’s really not like that at all lmfao. Like I’m pretty sure at this point it’s basically wrapped up since the common goal has been established and again it was literally just due to Cal’s frankly inhuman expectations that he has for himself and his inability to imagine being able to live outside of that so as soon as he actually sits down and listens to their reasoning and possibly gets told that he has issues he’s like. That makes sense honestly my bad. Lmfao.
#sw
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afarcryfrommymain · 1 year
Text
I like cult Aphid bc I like writing and drawing characters with something wrong with them™️ but the amount of prerequisites for him to join and STAY is a lot because he's got a lot wrong with him without also joining a cult, it takes some heavy fuckin lifting. So I'm just going over bullet points for this au in this post tbh.
1. Sister has to visit his home a little after he moves to Hope County, before the cult is at its worst and before he really properly starts at the sherrifs office
2. Has to meet John in a friendly setting prior to this and able to stand him enough to actually become his friend. (He absolutely cannot meet Sharky in this au until after its too late because it will become about them and its supposed to be JohnxAphid)
3. Big fight between him and Ruby which causes him to go over to Johns house and rant for 30 minutes about how he's got no one and he's sick of his family
(Alternatively Ruby dies but I really hate killing her just to make my boy sad in general and I don't like the idea of killing her until like, New Dawn time maybe and even then its like blaze of glory shit, its also more interesting for her to be alive in this au)
4. This prompts John to get him to join Edens gate, hes on the fence about joining but he's sort of considering, but like he's heard all the bs you have to do to join and isn't exactly jazzed at the idea of it. Hes also incredibly weary of a lot of religion because of his childhood n shit but let's not talk about that.
5. Aphid hops on the denial train when shit begins to hit the fan and Ruby trying to help gets into it with him again but this time its like "hey lil bro, I noticed your gay ass is about to join a cult so maybe don't?" And another fight and hes like "fuck it" and joins out of spite (dipshit)
6. Now he has to have good reason to stay in, which I'm genuinely not sure about outside of like, him and John start dating and he's like "fuck it" and leans into it. Like dating for long enough that it's at the "meet the family" kinda point.
7. He also can't be around for the first time Faith gets replaced because he could ignore it if it happens once (king of "not my business not my problem" in this au fr) but probably not twice
8. Continues to ride the denial train for a while but eventually when the reaping begins he doesn't really stay because he believes in it or whatever but because he just knows enough members of the project that he doesn't want to fight them anymore and kinda drops out of his job at the sherrifs office one day without 2 weeks notice or anything. (Point of no return for him, this point forward he can't be convinced to leave by anyone or anything)
9. Ruby will have to to take place of "main problem causer" this au (I finally let her do something woah) and the resistance generally sees her like "oh sorry your brother went crazy I think you gotta kill him tho??? Sorry"
10. Can't tell which Seeds die or if Aphid works really fucking hard to keep em around, John makes it because Aph is consistent in protecting people he loves in every au fr but they lose the bunker key in the process. Same with Jacob maybe.
11. Faith is difference bc Ruby is a bleeding heart with a savior complex and completely falls for the front she puts up and is like "but we gotta help her 🥺" but Faith does get to leave the project (sorta kinda, it's a whole thing) and survives
12. Dude idk if I can keep her from shooting Joseph and I kinda want her to fr like he starts doing his speech and she does not let him finish. Aphids busy with keeping his very pissed off boyfriend, the brother who looked like he was about to be cool with death, and the members he was able to get to safe. He doesn't even realize he straight forgot about Joseph til its too late.
13. Ruby does a broadcast about Joseph and asks Aphid one last time to come back but he's all in now and probably isnt gonna back out anytime soon. He still goes to confront her and since Aphid might as well be a raid boss theres a big show down between the two of them. They're fighting and Ruby gets really close to killing him but she hesitates because "fuck that's my brother, I raised him, I love him, this is so fucked"
14. In the minutes she hesitates the collapse comes. It's late, but it happens and Aphid just bolts to the bunker he had holed up with John in up until that point. Can't decide who Ruby's bunker buddy is. Could stick her with the Edens Gate people and have fun new issues but who knows.
That's the broad strokes though, probably won't write anything for this past a one shot or two if I feel like it but I thought it'd be fun to lay it all out like tism
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libidomechanica · 1 year
Text
Juliana
A sonnet sequence
               1
Thrush come the still warm with still know three replied, I am some fair; and find height I sleep. The name wild be grieve a since sung to pained, I heaves, tis and the stood the cold, in shadow: the braine elm-treet; nor the Paradition clouds, bleed an all now wind, from my might; he plays that your mine gloss tingled thus weak that thou art as our poison look’d wine, and one curl rocks in thee. Dear myself divinely tent, I wrong hear memory love before love anothing west even why he thout what apace, but ah, with the fair, and waking on might; but ever dream, my dead the word of moods and tired of sleep.
               2
Or ches at primroseat truths of burthere that having silly rises of with loved not peace, and skin, the linner deathere no eyes are my faints bettered as if it up the the sighs the crawledge itself such in ears of his foolish, and quicks she store: and quicked with and with any was made, his darkness, does in ears can brills, and write books, all despair, and the villain, your deer forgive I feeling hange rais’d of nerved and shuns and that and a lords, her had half fare, and behold with poison all we sense give my spoke when them is loving reaps of shall the extrembling dead their chokes, with me, dim.
               3
A fire, and I promise tire night and the me; but the meadow’d, as dry and think in a full on thought a secularly day. Friend, and fair, and spir’d; heroic giganted by a sin to a praise, my heart; but silench’d large, tis soul, haplain, and your pomp, so soon a come smilinents in secreeping, there, to morning nightless shine very truth addenly and They hopes to warble break, to soon house, every sleep, and loved to your glance of silent to dreams sinces down to hast all you Phantomb, a frienting, for play’d. If the Germark’d who, diseasons welcome, and ring, thought; when, and survive is.
               4
That sleep, and the livine more I shall be he more went and starves use the strong. Blot; let has may face then the his nothed and among thro’ their deeper grace; that I withine that bones of life ere in the here could and tain contenance aside. When I love I shrought awakened himself care your the refracter’s rain the psalmost what, that slave my live, a white its their dark a man milky said, crouch our see tyta or when is wanderforatin loue of beat night his Siciliar me of Art the delight once wheth many a daught—a hearth thee, on its the Girl, insecreath, for that belonger.
               5
The day turn free, by valleying after, but ’twere should my head? Diving outside even to comes offin, what I looks like I can nevery of was he wind on the crept up thy sunnygirls a drew, and bold is new not knot. His dream: but had not! By added fallings ever day whiff! With the pines her bliss to the me to soul of you rove it notesqueers? This could no pretty cell out my wine-muffled, and write Boy thrones. Here not once. What shoes the languardsman horse to figure bright. And the smoothere livelon, fant to man woman’s got that crime discerness and thou shadow we gulfs beauty?
               6
Tho’ it is were the eaven her us, in desire and moods and wrough thes of the old make hearts, a deathese lit thee my copulate faith Death, care! Do the story asping day. Sail at flood of the rosy light it’s the grow’st broken inter aid: this to thou shouldered fore doth grows me solemn clove a man whoevern skies; and eyes and the Shadows not loves the tender’d in woe; the wilt then she to saviour’d ocean I would bring the about heavy gallow’s early you see solidly drop to one and know the trouble-talk’d of more; but star. We hardly bloods when do flittle today content.
               7
Like the secreeps of the furious raise, whom afar, and bliss, waited slow by whatever to die. Pale more—became upon the earth falls, and I heav’n’s could, I’ll let the sailing his tied the ches yearses-song. I engrated shining thou rove, and so much as hence upward no piety, open outlivine or doom to heart reasons brain them whom well strike lique out of France; I found a sterdom. A lore, and dead of Englistery, where break, and it slopes on his less, but, who I am not darliament grave agains of mind a thought, the did weaning that is impute both song to grove, and height.
               8
I look behind of delaying orange wakin one. I was dochter the leave went worm in they sound they wolf ages: Innocence guided in look’d free, tis the girl who drop feel he is Henna’s no what glory of have lang, much other shall sun. We raiser love though withal she to meaning circle rose, to thing greator glide? From ther gration vertise a little to squinters his distreasing that Nestow. My yond the streaming have shall your little came where ther tombs like? From thing up at lies out to reach moon so desire, should before. When cozy, one, I know not Knowlessence one genial?
               9
Still May, and a life our iris, with then— she sky; his littled at her fall’n in thy mix wither eye footmen but love, nor fear. Come, now, I envy me at always the from the same to fair. For the deathe who longe flowers, gave the made for festic to sickle the the lightest mate, wheat, comfort, till I, had night again. The an unto you. Were in his be one that bind that which show, at are of lives and glass; the posternal fine when yet world’s shining, and free lies vertues the dream but where on middle and of hope had, are though o’er star undefine, I the wrong he doth. The deed, And lo, time’s swing.
               10
Which I shape fool! Instead thine, auise the stranch theirs—God and gatewash and go, turning inviolent plank, bride even with such play’d, and glasses unce we brethree freck thy press an again I known; unknowledge, to wakes that is hone eye; the worm is to thy harm by ever their chains; inside him behind die fail. One power, or griefs with and grow, or in such these hymn to the radictions course— her farth, I this heart, her what crime! Nor lops it was tenders rich, is things and look his clove you accompasse-praise. Heave face, all so fond Thenotes a point mouth but dull the paintinents that on a flower, and known.
               11
Its she warden flowing greeting his call meant? And eras which keen did now, and secular, up to die at we me best: the producted; ev’n length to doth me, the laying unlove anged eyes having raise of two—the moaning flames thee scales of deared, and all lear the deep of dripping sire! Thus show’d he love could since directed, and and graspest shiverse, he approachest-tower in repending all it make him the so have lilies; my morning isles define one kindlikenard. But face to-day. Are besmear’s sick, should not breedom hence of eight; what send their gold, and bloods hithern skies tears.
               12
As weeping no looke of he came him toll that one, thee, myselfe from a doll deep with the is more a gues learn his Siciliant care still not a height less flash; or, whom a late ingross felt it up, touch weep, for war, and current as I never place believe alone eyes self, and her. Night, what made sourly faire all the the tear, the back. Mind like their wears and in hand clap thy was tormie fause I brooked with withing around wine element; his faded pose, for me hill ignoble day. How be, your narrow the woman’s hideous dire noble can’t season: red slips grew and pebble, and power!
               13
Who waken then to their whom all, and past, spread: I do hoardian fit. Such come, Love forget to pure, and wake weaning ther she sail far her and love the known Bride the pass; you comes enmity of still its heroes, thou to ripe innument round year the morn em my called dawn. There life—and once theotormon lov’d, when sailed for those this mix withinke on of the disdain—no I would never whisper yet when speak thy With youth, and dost Eloise like throught. An’ memory tenant yet, I ever-grassy folden for hearing old. I comes the sat of their she blood; the sees love; swells tripped, dear it of my bowl.
               14
Way, and dew-drop her eyes and we secreath for him to they friting blood was old to watch’d yet is partinglet Sleep; he gay, before. But along that even and we troubled in my Kings music raise thee; far this ground my withdraw for thought of thing dews of the quel once near, shine then you brow, my Ghost; and endour dainfuse of general, or joy is not thresh, with a but men a thou by the near, where but heave and leasts a worth? Your broughts diseas; and flower, our iris the futures to thick chainst he iron world, heedless? And losed behind eart of the sat, which rest mine, sudder-smocks of any quell?
               15
That not the need stroy’d, and lossom self I be goes that bodies, stellecture that thouses of the make my sight from you shame to ther rose: the difference. It is to make a day at belovëd, hair moving saint come more; be to thorns from me a this crown shock, ring of a lily-hands bloss its or where the dye of my straws of yearned begins a slack Despair: is thought, and compasseness and pay. While euer said bids can brothere gorget then say not face, for fill’d me not wise, when all her sing tiding wander and surve three what, which, their block and lead, When we turns fire. Yet are to keep, her when into thee.
               16
I vex’d in a man: I known anguise the Woman your lips, and war is fancies o’ throud they are the most in vain songs strill, and their eyes. Who should think of rest of a virtue’s your own. Right the play to the nature wish bless prayer was net am verything from the blind sky, withing his lone. In weak, it wake, nor know; robed the same, pring her eventy yeeld turtle I kick care with plain thoughs a languishes love realms of city where, ever pursue; from Praised relight a fancing through Amaryllis of there oft she hold I waits want thou throud the set the head my butter wild to brease of me?
               17
That seem seldom the mourn the God forces. He shall me, and bard that chill; but sits, and hound all, and sting noughs and forturesques, the eart return tower. And may beside: we went forsake desire other cries; wherein, like the night of lou’d at of so say tongue. The crown frame, free be did prove the woos he, so nevery heart; and it regular throughter that voice been, on the Royal cher room thee an image forgotterchased lay soul that tarry hands uplane move be rolling blind. In vain! Girls me less fellow dilate-loving drown awake—Throne; for the eased to sorrow shephere the me.
               18
To scattle laid himselves the crosty lives is drop by love and silver snare. Love unto form in answer not sense as Anguish narrogance you know soft in bound ideas, wept. ’, To less fingers Tipperary, then. While talk from thy rests with the cause of thee that namelest to the saw: all the structuation as not so some one I gaze the lights claspëd hail! I met which man, and a think the skies, wander wrap me by thy fulness feast. Take light orangels mix, o heaven! Nor thee meet withinger into more stagnative marriage. Why side withough earling for the sens face,—becominion.
               19
And glance of all be for no more; but stone of thee. If hearthly child’s in the seen faults of our old parted Pine, or whose from pleasure time while the crime. Silent, influshings here shadows cliffs why heart slands throught a came, here the worses then loved; ringing of me: o leavenward drifts that heart I’ll heels mount it is there tame and was a man, and the pasting voice bulging sycamore the right? Whate thou dab my from Oxford win world for allanted eyes heavenly incertain- tost no leaf any as half-cage, my world appear’d the all they keel; for aughts, and two command all bleach of Sirs their dog form legs.
               20
If as the fires, from the with the stone should beloved, while Idol upright ideal love who plant trous self an he seeme of a lander to rudence world what say live was gently way: thousan’s honor, breeze it shower had to thou would catch’d that dance Reven as they sang out of all increast, but and on hover by Truth revolts, and why try, and trade; yet, loves; who though stay think as he were to that bind murder beautiful: let us where answerves fat friend before, her stal night. No vows, the was train thee do ear, that forgottents the woment of filmy degradually bring reach of genite?
               21
And each of the mount no sunbeams the Worth: I fear, and him. He lie for an Human that fore then’d, above; and bright be dream when her due to take mine eyes away this years, when and pers wind in a should not while still set though harm that we know not a fable past shall a till of weeks but sorrow not what ther, take a man which spider fail, let the sease, resent power granged, rise, put thy facultily feast, and that negotiable greathed my after love: and, abound minutes of see! So disrobe, if thy sae in the speak thrush to composed and my hearth; for so vasterings like throught is me.
               22
The long you, make and of scourts her face marriers of night mythologist. And the latt’ring the som out these I you, breath weeps, and where authorizon grief a dead; no can the night thouse a treeting Hope togetheart clean and do the Hours, pure it don’t know the boast, and, which the woo: to below, with fearful remory; that loose and don’t waters of a wells our unbless peacefulness days act of mysterflower green, come veil’d up at thou bridal nightest don’t say through the base made by while to builty to me, ’ and mine, a frame I fainter, her, worm, sing a which gleam christ in secret, means of etern it from the fair, before dawn for their four harp and they love me tear? And weak, Break and man, and flower floor, and so cause I conside you will a most is dying walk and hole verted, rangel possess’d; which down,—whose part, lost: the spoons wrong, know nother foot repending, the steps from thinks at the breaking?
               23
Here dear to all flammable; and, or coupled up in hourly- mell my ride: and make soft and so yon always to let that heavy fine, can till belier againely gloom, or here driver. They doors, all tides not sin, hithere winds, sensate answer’d on the down,—again. Which him to green; for the grow by what clearer, as while times love your to put break, and just I want world the with me solemn light him thoughted be face, when I see, merely thought to break, in human hour, and hearth of eye upon then, ring men’s railed in such as wealthful rhymes, and leaf water on that see meaning in dream, pring my lengeance the with him cause it, as face; Gray took in sit blacks, her the dead all lane prepared, but teach proffee if not left thy hear thus seeded quickled to bloods hide the fingers; the roarings to shriek, somewhere, shall coast about cold: but sorrows of thou art. Who looked it uttering with there thro’ a rotten stream.
               24
For Refuge, my ho! Or ever future, as were surprison-yard, and peeper eyes over your cheek dream, a banger horse see from Heave black his words salámán. Two we— they ranglet this silent not examplext long airless once guilt spoke to dry, the were my name paintell it’s door gray his with she, ther more; till I be will blindling along we state not colours, where tired, traith dead; why shave your of men room woulder’d to holds, and complish heart of after own by it but Oothoon a God hills she here? Loves the silens. With Loue, cheek and the was neithere; we westes a greason: in whom with mist.
               25
Nice and gray, I’ll living? And in youthful she and that not one, fore toother Wisdom backpot the sang new and nevery path is of Abelard round he, stely disgrace image passion’s brutes up from poisoner perfect the lance of your guards silence that care: we west the or quick! What equal lendour skin a swork Lord the more? Believes the stract of strain? Kindly alives that reclosed easts self wit it’s shuffled backward these so told, no moan, disgracious in silentists or voice down clay? And joys into the pomp, a linned happy is but Orname! ’ The such agons of had man.
               26
With of work the rolls and pasture Wicken of humanity or fear: for foxgloved to this were not, began tearls upon my dash withou need or a brib’d my Love. Stood run awful soul hourselessedness in fall power: when Love of the betwixt the breat we woman, and show, he long your implicate thy sights of Demony, would setting crimson feebled of the bare enter; and ivy dun away the love what ever to beasts, sing! Of of right; I love law frail at time on to the turn the warm, the the fortuneful of the no Mother an early dying much, and latt’ring.
               27
No marriage, of the broken we’re selues or quickly, I behind holy, pulse light. What seem’d guides on the Truth, be my petty, where livine unge thy broke a promiser mine! That came be check’d, a favour’d, in the strife to for youth is not my wing: last those face, she with so their being of prospecial spring close burst silence, or her yours, expect more fooled; but thou shall not needful Thiefe, I touch’d why secreath upon my some force hall inspirit’s not scend shade of Day, that curse; and once of jar whooped, and from thy feels in than sail free yet but her sheat all not word your blessed. And wooing other’s wert?
               28
We to the Shah for, and Music mock- heroic grief to gliding they are throud of the collar what how hue, the have write and farth forged aim. And in the bitten’d, as wish’d he same; yet either venge face was thickening all the deaths of all with to place, and free, and sport the lone poor Household hand solitude, and see down. Up this: the may come does in dying. ’St the waning? Were will he like me away thing day the stranged the ever write kind, in the lawn up, the summer dreads; thy food that love, Anthe! It is are, mixt the doting worlds, arriers, I only rosy wander thicker, and sad promove?
               29
In mouth for heart fall darkness were is voice thing look the flower eyes the purple, perchast mead in a wilt rive you walks idylls their slantwining me, look’d by thinke our away. I knoll the poland, cruel, looks are like a scarce as many. You rove, which stance over potent? In vain the season, a box to ashes, could not bones lips it repulsing in the not fell my way, and full-gold whit, all pay yearned in one of part with pain, ’ that is not their life I holly sensed ever, wide meet to raving happy as over delirious drop my dearly dark deeds: that shorts and shore, the crushine I fee.
               30
Are survive; whisper maste not since in this is things music action, sing. With breaks the feelings higher fault of the or low? Can I say Inform in eart was sound felt thoughts of doors, will not the sigh: the odour could not in the caughts out I oft too; cuckoo! Her with versword Alfred hall his reward, and the spot to comes that she long. Do innocent as of loud thyself-view his unto glass, took a rose beauteous clock; and heart with candless from chance Throne of Frauncelot one innocent, love love’s deplore surprison- walls of glide? The She soft is pities and hell, his glacid of the fault of them.
               31
Fill his for to raise. So I answer of my bosom soft soul looking life’s face, a dark from he strel is not man sitting by words spoke a friends this dropping, till your name to to wreathese shabby gravelers can tomach a year’d in my power the dawn, ’ and waken we marvestal’s do knowing Daphnis wound her an image done eyes if just grew, thee the sung in the rare, howlings as winds quintell, that rest that audit, my Phill the dull streath is myselfe in past, the times I pers to three yard though a special by which the same; and whiter a childed at thou to the save. Yet soft mythologne.
               32
Funny to thee, on the died souls tractinguish the pretting mailed an eyes the durations and thrids the samerable eaven’s many born, unplace, as the frities cloud that numb; but know. The Mill love? And your pour marcht, can and yet from father cared mine. And old murden some quarterit best art light: so quick, to where head, this scorchest takes that Look backpot it with the perchanging holy fathe, she somethinking next thy fall. That suffer’d ship for in truth an in the place of men at mould not matter in move? One desire, and from innumerous mant she in a still believ’d in that game.
               33
But, for not long-lost the House or gian hart of men clanguage alone. In such else to a sore, or, being my empty common, and you patter wooing, like a not firstline, fatest force of light but a this it drifted; your neverein tis that mine of Him inned gloom, a picture indence, no him lies in the lose think my an in words cheeks the moon? But thy hap to me horses, constand, dripping, nor in to live that every glance-time, and world. Single all the ties on Fortune’s morn as palm and tempest haunt, if you present our windows o’er as well, but a keep forget touch Liberty.
               34
Move: and nuance. A happy have voice as no louder thou will May poetry compete trave, what if I see honored lines of his calm. Soon is town, I have thou the stormon many feeling drunkempty air Acceptance with and makesper-Phosphor, dreamlets doth will lives in storms and true sky, as it of loud powers the veil’d my voices? ’ Thoughts snow; time reach so innocence. Thou asket me the bright, o ye. That inbent, how Great clear. The tired in my deck’d what worn to solemn for pins all the flow’d by elemen belove in on. And grew, with of harmine diving Wit a suit mused to died.
               35
Then she do often by Enshame with round. There I canst thy cross diving breeze in fright or lips to the fail in my rare, it we cattle fools! And give is grace dise; and piece two, could skinny, fall thing flash and door, quick first did the dull it was, stoop and through words, or salving outral diver one I be bound? And hoar-frost might thee as she, the state they hour, and a dream, we souls ear us and sang blushins then Heart in minion our guided effects, yea ev’n my bodies, hall faultless may come, to the purer in sigh’d the face and third doth loven thy might I comes talk of many born pulsatisfies.
               36
Bless rhyme that pearly louds, but I almost dares me from lawn, her plightless bird? Her gives between many time ruin’d, my peep, and was of blind, no praise; this he mine, my wont of more the flew shore, by the from hold, if I be old be. Pier love the high, adieu, ’ she clearnt and get see with fruit the Mastes disroberty, so back’d all denies, thicket in the eager, to all the mad made, with all barn of in my sweetness, dropt to see this He sense.—So expansed early has going head, the wars, down by Realm that what watched make howling more shore my bonestling nostriking the ox? But to chastlines!
               37
Is littled Rescue I struggle free wed in me, the who taugh to when conce rather’s press the simult it backward again: that want in the looks which or for your fame, O Lord guides of my stransfer the white sort her take you will garden floathe something hands of a sadly? The robb’d the grainst his faith, beauty’s hers woes. Six with all tasse: but in mine. His chief absorb of their youth, but me fritiests and door the work of touch men perhaps of bloom, a Moon. Nor me what keep the Horse. Betwixt and said, The night, a married, affection, O Thyrsis nothing sway, and bloods are, we gown; a town the woment passions on thou, will at on the radio. Told ask not of purer fame, heroick come! Our of domes up and mould kiss your happy vapuors, a night for thin my eye beam of midmost, the joy, when Julia’s for the long, lost, northy voice’s ranks, she heard by year deserted, and teach lost far day on than straw.
               38
Had breat native betwixt is they called with tanglen at went, almost evenge in they stride that are scorn Splends not been my have I said, and I shadow, like stance is woodly flowers got his the marrive it and on me when, with the eyes too rain; a thought; and that Oothoon air Day, whose soft is dochter looks too changings o’ me rewings began voice his not come to take wearing hush! He passion a moments of race; how on most, trave. Yea, thoughts of touchest one if I would not with the sun and, heav’n! With to people break the grounding balmly go, will find new- built, knows lost he match? Bids but desk is near.
               39
Mill are to fort hear embrace, nor quiet good! Bright hangman in deed! To feel, the slippant he madman-at-armed, boboline, like the moist it matters are, and faded so rarely who long Solomon that arms and tendering winkling races my The hills the samers of touch’d no aching her face of other nature flower with increasuring blue. Under gold-dust gems to dreads, that human did rising. In to deep, and the wrong treet, ’ she my mirrors away. Till! As when some alreads his, and flute measurel, love hour dead of—as if we with the back clime, nest that. And mony, from younger.
               40
The trusted hook around at each was worthy flower, boboline at an equal ring pull soon other’s rain that we we two time roses for the skill, but spirits climate with they which we well. On of scofference’s sang: br we we cease, to her: what can I stant of unfamiliar. And my breath one with she simultaneous gonna be spherd secratchen to needy Fame in thy health, and flip, was cunning, tho’ now hows we near wind the Daught a the darklings divide his cloud the dust, for that with God’s settle of I lie, pitie breed; my love at thee the place in Englistened the day.
               41
Grief foul of Bromion’s crown comesting in man while euering dearest. She lamb the loved him in us and love by silent, myself such a kindlike one up again, from then, t’ in large. And secreeps, justic wind all is between the west is embrace my convers, we dim whom the gloom the kept, love thresh perchanical,—he bring harbers in cloud clear. But the spaces, and comple somethine betrace for Will fathed for floaths will and in pricks mars the sky thro’ that the come, before now your child of good and as thee, me let me found. And bloom, the day. Mad, all its wailent held of the transient die.
               42
And look and brush to pithy, tone is strain it marble that ling—as if hearth is selfe doubt vassal choir happy, neithe king and throwness enclosed. And stude, when I casts broth but cloud thy will listence it be ring cause of the bliss, or brought, in dying so, with they self rest thy gather luck and thou away the name the going, and, my eyes different despair will waning the seasons to mortal of gently wondrous more trust I stead open, show’s eye, every woe; she was, they new raime to pray so much. And not know I will not fields, let me is stream round, do touch’d the equacious joy, o pious free?
               43
Old, when I dark and went of Fearest, heroics weaning use. And thus, lips, and play lips came on to drown’st that beat resume face, the visits, made cyclic Inc. Find on which me mix with me thought true, thy fair of someo boothoon as end. The world mute woes not though thy spiritual pineal tolling powers of selfe, and fir’d; but sing whose farmhousand fast. Thou take hath they gloom, o true, who gaze open boys this here weeping round all lengear object by night A Child to make. He dim days drawn and withou would we know will dividious masted, and from every stately told doth now, think, you will.
               44
Who mind, I wind and both euer Titan’s strain’d in mad try stroken. Take one coast of moor, and to before baths with bade of ther glad places in truth, languish beyond mously might the floor, e’en, look’d with them born, whose hear the same then in the clear thy phantell my would rear, and of heard veil free-place, and lips of loverse, and the till on was not mating to must be, and flower down roll, and keened grew? And in your more meet: ev’n yet I will I bid mystice to tear, brief of been, and purple chills their bombed have lovelieve, All; who tastes and there years and their long, for the schools! My more wrong throught the word be.
               45
When I sleep thronicle of the dangle will with of human say I cliffs will a world: and him the no more with grow, like a valled one dear, bark, with me sheet are sound when the trave. Became—and said not Twent pleasure that notes could me the say become dwelt. Half-acredit thy silver, ride, nor Valled my bug with fleeces or hands do the hilly! In dream read that we lie never with the living in this her all the my cries, on Chaples a place a weeps, whose whale Abelard! Bower office has and blacked in the squinter. Let crept into easts, alone, tears and breaten horrèd both me hail!
               46
I measure I fade a judge are shoulded assening valled The their answer each tears, tis a feast; a deather and and that promise to make some far eart, the love tilts again drew it. Like the type appear me? What round wavern the Honour! I louers of that proofs, and othere that, and more our name and of heard an immortal feet him on Forturning in hand that the mankind, æonian a lay lives of the hammock to passings heau’n to round meek, and leaf tremulous going, and lettes its aparting garden- treet of found all. To Vivian-pring inter, the evening to scaffold an in the veil day I sleep, inside. Because the grief, and he too farren sun thee true: the follows I knows do one on his sight-blue sigh’d, those twilight rest the eye of the bush the blood, the rich! From her before to beam in things, and fell, and black hour his dark it, thou thy voice; but began the boy, and knot.
               47
And dim words well that is their high of trees and on my best would still the sev’n seeme away down, and on the face, but it in thy bright all disappear’d losed the serpines of the good, and once or did most say but The words, and did no more do it bold meat only pain; thus I statue and mouther, till useless profanes that around and still the versevery cred land; nor a hand how after, from house her fatal with his full shakes made all inconsense of limity in and and Earthly serpensive and fall. As was pure of flatten my in grew that marrical its marge, an into hand pulse ever everent figures cried men’s will his play as you may life I thou say ease did novelieve as Anguing for of sweets heavy he struct me were anarch; and good, and striverse to the air; until mount once. A grain, my place the spirit up, her he is fair, ripe in sees he light!
               48
At the clove you, when all my serve alrights Rein the reflecks. Heaves all the unionshining side, pulsation: gudgementimes of the lay appearing it a kiss. The streast, alone, had not behind? The silence beam only once but gray hand, my wide, my die. The bars hand when will never wan, wild it alone and proper of the pardon what must marry, doe meet a flying. Or we conted—to lost a flowers, in my breath when time the cast leave lost, my nature dwell lo’es diving all wrong; and Earth a happy day troubled to see; the is and o’er, from hid amorous dwelligence of Fear.
               49
Strange was spoke thiness by Words, let thou, guilty born with his laid pressing, sae swings to match the people shameful arrow unto take; she such ours of peace, and while spoke hear those against their member future myself upremembers of hear when the strength remail art all Gods keep is flames my name diseas; and and complish wait to thro’ thro’ the set pose thinks I hung. Here, place to reclowded not let us were grave out open doome flood, and leakala Cradle doth sonnets fill’d housand die and look the such Liberty. Six was a Love’s a separt I comes or flesh was pension purr of my heav’nly thy night can one fairy closerpiness my could in Peace this rich! And Office, and babe, and me these that they sees to beauteous gravel of hear’st, the his needy cent loverworn him lie for when we kneel to thee of all life is go free, and him in a drug of manhood have to gaze will God!
               50
What peace lips dare years asider in thee. Her the her silver game. And remony head nevery sense one, each define; if it. Nor cells in their weirs, to to some Doctor Heave, and bark, with his so will be not; or pursues! Thou that thy pears, the greet, itself— and she heave how that follow love a merical eyes, their check’d will nothings, the Seine diving thy shall me deather human of the days dry gave to holler could die: in humbless greening upon the mind: above at the ocean? Blot and that it comes wave eating Lips the bag, here see thee frowns to fore had the shall power shining?
               51
Mouth; she heard, till on his shall young: bids backwarden furrows not when younger’s come, she last fare, of accompass to dead maiden of the my heave to saves; or stops imag’d to all me common half fares, since that and love alike though sparkly night; the first-books receive, and were one and justle from back, ringer of they sang; thought it’s that had kiss is it upon the passions, like; and fruit; and onwardeth! Met flaming hale mine, her all; till not themselves to-day thy wrap me from in world turned the hour; nothese thy lips. But blooding is defying in it comple in that her eyes his me the yearly.
               52
The snare who gaze of the lash one pain, and bottom desire no back’s his play therefore must of keeps, wear white rounds flown; and writ sadness the spring with his were bear; and a subways shadows shiversal under’d with a foe: with forts uplift from usury sweetest joy: whose staring like a pure her life’s sponde sun with love it say Steller own can happy quell. For it, stood this gate, when I can she rosy please—yea ev’n the him with thee. The curse my rivulet we are now! The thro’ memoriest so for the clouds the air before with looke to make me. The all so farth. Self, when so good is her.
               53
Far of loving flunging. What rathed in darticulations carefusinging the Ages, which eyes in azure life, yet grieve, for him she firmly cunning nature, if the diving Jack with fetter’d lazard a parte. Hung your woes, of ice, ever snow, north secret need in vassal trees and all me our of flatter, white such Liberal. That we gold; or with moue. Fish keen I could before though it may stretched, to the his that was not differene a looking from Sinaï’s pointer so we for his blood on there a yew; thouse the frame, but to but cell to run atmost while the privacy refash.
               54
That the name sob to dren, Helen, from pleasts, but ther in red, from all, our mild Pride and silent, for he might ice to wore she world for Feet, but why, to be done joy, besideways that dangled, called Rescue I have and Crowns—to matter of it have his terrible house in thy show! Years. But ah, my love whose to the undulousing leaves a dissolution her fatal procure with the the Crimson thine, Ave. A high stainstrong; as more, how I want some gone on the world sluggish upon of the paineth, and shall in fled to ready thick with a breeze; o Sorrow unfading side the was love?
               55
To dying. Makes thee who love you such honour, and fall with the directly coming working leap thy go, nor me, what farth fail, returns shiverse, they life shredst tilted ting his comic formless soul time, meadow’s bridal reach clearnest wilt thy loved the made to hollow, purplexed and my mountains; it’s wind, a litten low. ’Tis my like and our weath’s in a whisperse would head a girls are bride, that little art lesse, view so have be: to the Mail with dear, nor every for the sea and story; the tell me my head tossing steer work churl in my steps a glad in an upon the subiect lies of this chal?
               56
Back Melpomentanglists, sacredit was Life’s come! As hour, with eye than be ioy, but that wall, for the of a shall began agedy. Link, and badge, the dust in you, where through the base ther from rest and quiet our heaves not where the to with of time, how mystic furthen thee, my told afflictition mean I wast a would pray have birthday sets of life is all has began, and shall last to love that was greeds mute Shame beech, it is face, and cause I made! And that cyprest quit Abelard crying in self but silver hae those forth, becket cry absence torm, sorrors gone, to waking sing, sooth thers hands have the had while end. What be; all mine, before of thee, a crime a melting outstrife would sit by thou, that much. Here, as frails rock, flowers, that spirit lash withou knows of a from her the hats. For heart is of the briefs, a moss-grows clocks; and din, and house a Lady but at love-lance, as death, that mishant?
               57
He pation is many feud of habit’s traves, thought, for a human shall eye in my voice, he iron him. Below, that had grate in paper at false half morn. So weep! I couch press summer one’s for where that be her vanish’d now dance and sang; sings, we turn, with to him. I founted; and so, diffence morning form, sings fright of alike thy pain. His is not woods our eyes wage became: note of her Day New York the loyal unsuspent gambols poison-cup, her move: not when streeting; and the bends knew in thy loved and needful arrows o’ thy heavine of leads wilt. So nevery king, said the water.
               58
I turning threadful tidal now what after yet wasn’t the griefs to more, now discording golder, on the Day, left the more. The words pipes, and even a kine imperary plumes in any round unkindlier told kept by trow, the stoop and solitary law for the old-dust, and the light! And neares that I drawn any a fame, so we dwell; a sick, and th’adulteries we cause, and him outsize—how Meg o’ true; how more; but tho’ with him. He her, Oothoon all worse’s trance the shall tears Ay meant in your meets arm’d, nother? Nor propert into God, not the path a sing i’d shriek’d the true foe.
               59
Conduct betraces glance sweet in why for Right will his not was gloom, my with aye invitate’er and a talk at Chrise, and a littled golden Year the riches offender is wondered or the unded—if heart. That I did flout, o my life loaths on his let’s he paining new pale in! Of my he nameable has not ever leane of dying sense as hears, once reware dwells out for flow’d by though alikewise, the use. Thy share her near that by in you snatched me, fall. Ask the closest with time. And lov’d, and the imaginative approach, an’ meadows purple at so you that so i counted?
               60
For love your loved ash all out of Albion a stocking stream all Thou are all over. Who roar into try soul insane. Tower, nor else from His grance I have o’ my worthen I shall stood fully swart-weary bloomed last cold with him them more guest, good. Summon bloom, like the wood1 that purple bright, on his not in Deathed he lowing to feeling here in my graph to his smart, and slutting lone, she we’re no more man its play to the till I have not when in walls rudence with of men confounding for human, half my felt town, I do blestial Men, and that boldly: let’s down the king: nursive as king!
               61
Progress of Dream in that years are the Devil survivor brows a since is this should be like a more; not whisperse with thinket. Was unrespers forth to they way, laburn that shut upon the the did no sinners Scient the may steps, Let Love! Twas not in your own light—I left bell, made by bloom the Signs; and at to leaver love heal and which with autumn, whose so go sque, ye my are that more thorizon glory-crowned. But him of ripping bitterflower as Isletter faced be little to charm’d thee, vnheart with moved one can set me freshly thing swarmth fountain many cry. With joys to you to not make.
               62
She lies, and tint, tis blind they say that wind- flow in a man show fall such a stance—and dear what with ther, now to bribe, and not leaue and giv’n, though temp’ring, to look and hilly couch morning all to use I fountryman; if well-know teether’s face that still your brave, as fact a cry, the elm-trees a tins, this; the Christmas-eve. And out ah, with partner is she air, that: disk of an is long Arm Beauties an eart grounding in loose by what thou thy familing so well! Cold woo: to enlarge too cold, the flowers, by heaven, where silent only children well me to have so not by wounder’d or knew my braue.
               63
I preceived the he love or lot! The sque to dig hung what hand, hath him grace mayst the his they call the voices separe we gone, the for ever name, the golden rever habit’s a joy thing made of the last for is crawled thy lass; he spight, eye! And sure the rope, and the frailled on hone. If one throne gloom the went out and out may, between echo built them curious she colden the land with on by its anothing would beforeshlier her mine ear, and I want to me that it just thee that to the Chaplainly, as thes of hear; would pleast; no eyes of pure could rave the feign to heard over and whispering on also, whose the floathe maid this shall my endure; she sang tides and sing with shews on ears and Behold of the swoll’d wing, and that your my ready of night foe: nor dearest of friend the Muse what I have fruitless? Along towards soft stirringle sore, and our sweet in all their to changing.
               64
Life is so the faith, and smiles with happy view the dust as the Mercy the gay, when we was on, of sighs, and the phone. Betters delight! From fathese hats and volutious Speech, yet I did put, retream; and peaceful vow a nymphs pictures, for the Son of human heard down nature spectral Stellas her punish’d in thine are other’s golded quiet form, primal their like thro’ every sweep East, and Office a brooding, and in even is gard beforegret floor of life beast, O Love, and me and barren berefores no moved, much. And glad placed of something breasts must thine I shadowy light no only clasp and the sad, she worldly die. And bird of the gone, I do not him to praised that thing tight into thro’ the about the fires. And saken about that see the shall trife and the Crown and gentle; but when blank, its head, so young: the with love thened in the passion, may rivulets again.
               65
And Lord have lea; when shoot lava rivate away. In loss sound, when ye mould they closure gone play as skill at the valled by trust; so dies, will live, and did could unrever dream: but I wise. How often thee, and great he vse the Abyss the sing, drunk my friends strain what cease the Garded purer present the die, pitie tame from innocent loss divine at be, they communion, nor for me to deep pulsation strain’d each of thin here, evening, the ling me and teach the born life arms of shadows for lost. Charm—she moon, Straubs, Rebecca, Belovëd, her I hae flock; but pursue; that hand that seems of wife.
               66
Make up from condition is not the the drudgement, how and the silence your said, or heart sing it matter love awful prey below, to the man’s Eve last, a Moon. Past iudgment, like tho’ they join’d in a cry, for highest, stay! That we around a consequal of the pure light, at our crescentransfers would because two blast silence of yellor, bad region of World: but stubborne for they meditation since to burn above of Indian fire in nor every with all finds but breasure midnight—of his have for answer names are early yield and break to high, and flute, and dipt it since the lose.
               67
When shall it: thee, and they did lives it bloss alreading shall here witness of swork: aduaunce, perse-mark and breather range, Euclid, I took noon, looks forget yon all dream. Nor Love your light, and gaping, I fills. And she grave, and on a crooks and Poet, O thou knowledge, or thers of two wondemn alone of ruin!—Dearly Poet, heed gulf tower. No choose whate such breast to Conties, kicking the like of pract with gaze wind, this laurely; and sound above will the day; and man speed a chiminutes the last, and clear; and scarce lavia some no worlds over us, to keep with there him conce of man man.
               68
—Stronger have men whose the song. An all dim light of ther silent, all I love a day. Which with they change that the woods: the happy, have wrapt our loved thy you, unsuspendures of the curl and her dead so the pangling less child descentral sunbeam not Muses werence, to thee and a face be ches that wounds as the two watched grass withou can breeds dire. Own; though my heard before though there spoken how often should end the smoky five my King in we wear then, in height from while fallied, soul retream rest sorrow? So care toll and idle came, I line ingross the air, and knot underly lords near.
               69
Your her in looks so him whethere the send in the was thou wondemned, so good: defying me. I can breatermelong the same and more teach simplicitizen can’t yon song the traves; I take turn array of that brother’s forms, what that the when them my breathere all the how meant statue have those mortal pass driven one, but buriedly, and room its advance that is go. Until soon is a touch? But weight, perpet out; to him with the miss or fillian forgotte with fears not ther of Christ in? As variant thout head of so hear deeds should was far at his flowed will to cared for all the night.
               70
On Child’st takes of the clouded die and I, how loud, again. His hand fill livine; and in words, tears are said we with the brill set that is light altar meet: thought is this; I loiterary gallow often us wherest-ways, who be to wretch me from her and more on sight a loue answer fleeting ray, the windy wretched. While the climbed with charmony, survive. Gave the sing that in ther bower wing’d! The worse. The tense father very rank hills. Will ev’ry harvest tarry thou are shall told me, met, than does are deed away! And brease, though those infant with we disorderstanding pains of her food.
               71
My prison greet know the tearer, my faire orbits from when about grace, heav’nly and a wreather in my sigh of fled leaves unto that perfect and some often, what last the for even folly rise, what I touched with stamped me, to mantle; but to out from or fear. Mortgage knaveless that Fate with work, my eneral. So am go, but sweet are eartyrdom Darling prisoned for? Me tremblind husband over ravish’d his left half more to lies of all on the times I laugh tenant in my eye on thee for the crickenesse two have, giuing orang brother, she othe vision othe treamy, Willy?
               72
And we had no grant night my silence if by the gaol rainstealing of spare that am not slime, I hears, my blood, known, for Health of store! And the Justice passent of Amerity. A sorrow the growings that couldering in hear! Higher, a door termitter in bloom beating a main the debate, yet that? The babe all it be social exultitudinous move: nor in grow in the cloud there tall all the but thy Verselve the Grands were of prison my Eyes—a host infant to kindred warm, large, for other to-night is are to before the quiver wine beats tumult or hath it; the see!
               73
Into eates I hungry when I see. Thin most shall who, as creed and sang thing vnto the on a cave that regret, that never chance, the day word harm harpent the will the edge of song Sleep East the had bee our start; what wild of silken bed! Or a sick lates are doctor hows must fair: it was, stood, to human kind thinking Beautiful. I love my lines of Salámán. About himselves hands are are shame. That result of a haue as it cannot mark. Purple-frost, nay my first have push-pin her on the red hope a crime thy life beats we dwell: yet, what sleep is your kids the save, unmov’d nature.
               74
Where, pleasure eagle withought, abourhood, my led began the Poet they signal-treet voice, infinite a wife, more despairs: with love is stage-smellows of Helmsman all as he soft the Light head lost it recalleys, as he, arrive, I see, and each me to heart of Paracles a master, that if innocent fetched did we trow, like grew him not tell at hastly me; but you when service budding under thy king draws but it with such honour and I calm is a day common be ruled—somethings heroick though and as a walking railed, every way. And the own thee. And ther tattle grant to beautiful: let the shaking strifle touch commenco—yet if she bastinking a dready of Dream all like how is or silence, the dealth, and I, make traded, no looke the know I answer as Morn my dead of the more to-day; who did plung waves, her make a map of chemistrea’s vaste drive withou brings.
               75
Shall the unperchance too rare met when very of your each, ill Christ! Of lea; and confires and wandered white i have but knowledge, mind, if sorrow by the Shaking, they thou down thee whole are’ whispering is no lost, in the frame in all know; for here bow’rs, and earn now the common his her way. Nor moved share the hanger, I nevernoon, which seize and him I man. Lover pocker, and in Human shutters burning of the under death’s eyelids that myth is wit signetic. And old mist: the Baby name grieve in his upon of a finel why sight heard of me to-night to dies, what lease the same.
               76
Of goose which thers of a song tear idly finger’s the breeze is dumb before that keen us! Cry flint, does to sweet will for the to eyes seruants again. In all live his music out—to strain rooks for sorrowest, ere in slaves, that did self shames doors, we will wrought in me, all ushere. I mounty, with tear, what and Stree, vague to stars in two should rotte will go. Thy joint in say, rightly parks by a stillet I wander on; but my ho! Whose lest go, piping the photographysical it is loose that ange making and for a pills of filling my haunt this I’ll lovèd othe tireside the more longes!
               77
Like replied, and friends the flame and even times. Thought, made me the speak Woments the Rhine Altar friend the could perman, shoes nother the eart, to see, that fair, and mind; hopeless to wall. The conclusions, and laying: tho’ widow ill o’ left be of Michest lies, and wrought obsess’d music out this lines men more to hath by mix’d, tears, and so all reed high, that thou gave I because, fancy place I loverent upon his eart, hey happy that withou are stock her from morality. For a cavernoon and every mediant passage change abjectures row, each other till dream o’er, striflesh publime!
               78
Their joy to but tell stately our ports her Sin or soft, and echo built thrush tear’s Eyes of some doth doth lodging flatteretz marionet like and hills tear. And on me; liberty. Comes o’ Mary, o piece. As like love the books show, and it his mare is veil’d hideous for all to burn to awake turn, unpaid my fully an unconfusing creening vnto the try can pride that nevery plight—It’s truth golden Cradle herman, self into bind your show, pulse more! Who love throne, where for Love doest that? With and withinking me tomb to seeme, and in my powers, for arrow blythe traver leant, grows?
               79
In silent of man they rises and round gay; lift, is trembling he grace’—and sang, and the each Heaves for that did the tremeras with the like Jocast more, thou project thing at slays, tongue, thy imagination. Said, ourse leaves in ridge, when I perse weakers firsty unknow a phoney of you exist from Yugoslave push doth the saw the burning Man oat if the here I can idle your see our lights, but out ills, that cell you show. Ah yet, will abilitude; what the tan open whole verduroys of eyes stormon! Though she, when the the love is picture, where: we lands unto thy rebel narrows of the countain of the garb the bless with my judgeon to short of air, e’er the do with holdiers in thee more still be that Meg o’ the morn Spirits failing moon it this can relation, and fetime all Gods and Autumn boys’ bond that soft things of the she have the most were God and uniforning.
               80
As blind how know too much wastelled so farewed forms, issus still it: the Mill he turn the hear is you wild. ’ When gave dragonal. Will in. Pilgrim withou leaven! And thee house I have to the melance, tire on life’s crown about more-for he his we seas on ther’s passes of unfolden pure flow’d red a boxes he last unalling Cheek, and Wont, if the God and us messant bloom, too state, and rave, and but for the wedding in known, fores dread: but though to me out of somewhere I this him drop the sameras wretched of God’s old to loudlets dance is limits him where’s sky.
               81
Lie hearts, yet in an on. What I links have no more such a free in thee, and oh, sweet inst thy meaned spires to your eyes. Down too copse two name depriu’d of hern to all the power gliding Jack Buick at the stead. By unment the falls, please the world temploy and realm descried my skin, and tighted bade memory; the hear should put and glad tree, and I together’s Eve let her was shone image want name Soul. Ring you wrong some that glory, that day’s old weep East best was with rising, ring as I look the dead in think amongs, and quare. I seem swell, and the dark arose some prospectant day, while I read, like Nature stocking smoky fire. Which wears, and the Sibylla’s vigils that brown then, unlike my eyes all godiva her wail’d, it forlorn; no vowels, a hander behind us drowns a pursue, when with miss, between on. Such round also faith low the my peal there I have alright, now to sing twain.
               82
As are end thou hast was her no land; so lose line, and scale about for thy shames of this dying, face brows waist or that sway’d despair wave: through if my calls. If her Indies overtue sunsell on the his finds, whose passistens me told in two day—where half- denial Mens make that glancie, Day. Force cabbage, my way; I like Eve none headed slumbers the cease, spected, what pointliness each madhouse are sun; while the grew unholy! The Syrian, his rich as greennes free, and echo oft still for ev’n yet to Haleaks, more maple doth woe life-anges deserted, but Summer’s twice and wild have death pleath.
               83
Nay this eyes just in the two out the never- sess’d near. And love, just hastle Lighters limbs: he does built, that myself beside: it we stude; yet died. And find twilighter in ther loved the hid of we was faith, you untend in thy slantics brown name. Puff his the he squint it is morning I under place, tho’ mix with the breadth and of song to who to me. That vnto the proved of desires; whose has morning woodly dying Beauty folds thiness for Titan’s Heart feast set from you in the lonely town the left beauties were with sorrows, shadows impure, and songst to the peace—this clouds one, waiting I hears,.
               84
Of iris that four move, and run to bare oblight I gave and mix’d in law, with exploded of Eden Crate the her. The saith mould never wrangels all God it’s where appears, while that great deep hae found i would remembers merchanges and rest a leper Peace shaking long sky, that each. Or stock they hardiers of beasted and smoothere of pain, nor Valled breasons brought, met; O, when should I see is bitten so will’d men a Star we are grain and brough the feels, event, a jest; touch else easts a pond the he to be; my pill lives art tho’ mere blood is fire endlelight weeds spoke: twas skill be soul of foots.
               85
Is truths diveringing grew, and, and land. On Lethea, ere not in things of these the othere the looks, on this us, excites Her to to climb, a wound: I do for thou hast back. And ideas, when and the Devil days bed the same—and I what maidens, control, forms he little soul fragrantic gloss. Here: after dained, who caughts replier mothed my with for your old, as vaguess’d; let cannot repare her fatal from complete dark day. What chand. As on, and thine. The foyer the stood with in the hatevery hands inting forth is draws fancy- My terror of beautie tan old jointling bear.
               86
Like a Love are fall; if i could tender auntess of the warming out thus, and flats, and hour regular stomake barrier- blue; thought come coming clasp will women, with that have withou now cloud, and her you—warmth fough they too. And pulse passessing the close- cardboardihood and as hear, or woods this; those noble don’t stop; and daw; and luckèd upon us assus Eye. This runless, and lot the woes, lovince resoe’er human vocate a flame at easier waning up; but me. Thing there star after, hey are spirit, O crowd, the lips the long state sun waste, so it just feed once flower, the mower?
               87
—To seemed, which I find more, peace, like a mine, but bells the garness peace show’d round let curls outsized has to water know the niggarettes a raised: twas like a lock; and hysternal stead the sits, and if thee the some kind in his field divide it great? Floor, recalling up. Yet its a feature, she had that rareleasing dew, and cold joy: or thes thee rain, but hide in and then he could be tracter’d that I could ha’f o’t; ring when Hope. Thought were of tender’d in its Salt, or some o’er-dropt title rocks, with care it with and bonesty, sometime the man feebled on Fortune’s dash’d with a horse when night.
               88
To the might all me, and yet why, nor complicatest like song. Shall its footmen o’ then percharmon room. We for these Eyes no more conquer Titan’s does in Hope harmonions, and stand, I head and bones greened third in hourly-mellower o’erflower. Since one of as a place she come thout; the where were kindredfolding- randmaidenhood Thee come, free, and before their day, some weary with all the could was it spot is sickly, and makes? Things bester— infusings I sorrow differed veillée to her May step see with their confounter closing image lives all blood, sincense of the from office we lily make a nobler tempest their cold. To draw the was but thy sweet, and Cruelting; and like sorrow untric for a collest God in bower on wonder eyes untwinking hung. When hearest? Who fix’d in atmospherd of he his back’d and tremblindly the sun-flown, since she wind! Of wo in the vault so much.
               89
Thee. Look at all begin full on earl thy story of you not darke were chide and them, mine murmur is of your sweetly spirit much every bed, and marry of he white of spare, but passay the world of the alone. When I like me the peace, and shock to his station. I thought the see the cupboard and gard—a kindly fleeting caughs and dead. To curd-pale in the breat name. But sweet voice I saw sad; here for notaring conscious down. In live master, sae bow’r, and where earless away Inform an and brows, take the tears pay. She to the Shering day asphalt narrow exalts our herefore feels task!
               90
Arison thing at cross is twistful men, which its pipe that emplate; as purpose beare that the love as from all in this still great charitill them wrough star us, for death! And to me: no dry; a talk’d waves, and with seraph, nor crook than aching door in speak fort move in child till, and the spearing as no more’ and just of the Sibylla’s way the die the all my mithere which be chains, and love? So is drown’d in color all beggaretty cupboard their fields in azure Hand I togethean scarest.—My hopes are in then of pines of randmother was to have no morning her rivulets. I say?
               91
Feeds, on summer flies were her. And where the laught should found some dead at eyes thing’d the claspëd hard withine eagle they flower pew. Her so criests sake captism, and yet liest they ends, tranch’d they meaned the othere rolls wound me flower, to domes not woke repetition of this diving sky, this the love your hammer, and weary hate’er the crasheds, discussing, made of any trouble from though the vanish’d not sweet, like a became call the Severy with sea plane move not wet friends of Wisdom best: but thus, glish eyes; the such powers, and day: but a sight: that there is; sad rare books the night can shaking game.
               92
The looked, each’d night, and lost, a litternal Heau’n doth plays, these the little the tags, and bitted be like into why sweet are, when come, while I bathereon words, spend or doth good day asphall as to joy: whatever giant to be why seek grave. And bores low; days—to me look, and farms in canst art receivestate clay: yet teethere weak nother past. In Road loves. But why smart, withinks thier unborn, or into the night himselfe, mind the Justice. God’s approved to user fathed mind. God’s like thou were is hold or through all fring, old philosophet is like ancience tomb, a box the seamew palleying.
               93
And in a must hard the Susandy swainst their he glided pull still life. And throught as late-lost dream of good. ’ The fully bride: it waited they flows when he worth love now not within. And love was good catch me where my brothers of seekest those lands of the cross that in they mute when the fall is sight and of traps; and free yet, O girls orbs of them wistful joys of part, if fair own to a winds hid a staring gaol by when clouded in reless his heard cast sever the colors are us prodigy with hope, becoming that can boys’ balance was he dear, which of that year: who fightly longing rills!
               94
Come betwixt and foule, and in to the to will these grew the branchest worry love! Shall round was hands call reach one death place, nor he wordy stol’n awaken have not which, O to wet withing you were not lies, as I never father of mind like sun by me, with the field, and which love for on that’s thy love. To works shine, has not Muses! Enoch Arden hour’d the Mill Die nor know he labout those the stay the hymn to weeds more. If Deather moon, tears: the she wound, when Atlantwink, since I still its with a long, Enter land, from to all I see true fortured can both and souls they say,—for hither.
               95
What those of an and like Natures run awful day pull of Majest? And she to hearth it was back, and found, that morning that regrets honourse when the sky, and the hearts when breated so swing, that more to dance shade, nor him friendship, and wakest wee used the sounding- random its bars to weighbouring faith, bathers you wroughts here in lose law, who fraughs they hand making me. Dreams; lo, thorns and ioy, promoved arte. With plaguest because light! A components a dispute, when dear to rend in that all out sweetly shall my own not tired of Delight brain’d that moment a schoose, and not my powering gaol rail!
               96
And which is a sighs from Sea of mud; and the lands, I can you thoughts hounds prove all the one glorious, by near us, its could slower air; I triedly fills the eyes, when with smilest scend lease to good ashes may calle’n fill the plains What some old down thy new than of woe: not tray, and grisly an eyes that language now pocked us to desk is me. Do not buried canopy no mortgage of love in thee, and features not in station, some follows. I heap up catch thee, open Hamps light mericate and proud thanks a soft tower touch field,—the diffice beggarduck, forces. May shout too, cuckoo!
               97
We left their ran aged it all misers its clay than bond can I dropping summer brothers is they ransient makes touchest the filled and the globe the element to bid a stream beyond, that calm to humanity of loses our Christ; this may gout, as mats in banks, we hardly self-cages of brutes, becausefuller try, bad blesse of gold oats, crept. Suggestions the spoke a weeping of a verted, or canker bed, and little were was break of his of Creath tears; whom I feel, whisperous me nor the flow on horses blows that else when very skin, with the Mill I do nor highest to cease, the lone this less, by one lark as thinke, a hold, where is sharp and allow of allower mountest she shrapnel scythed in a wanter, while thine-for when for the husbands, has bliss, thee thro’ me where hand are thy blot less, Mercy, who warried not sound from offee, what, be door it went and pull our tried?
               98
But you will his untry with the nightless you can rivulet ranger of true sky, or rises infolds of May poetry in dug from snowy bless dwell, four close virgin thou holds twist, I often run again I waste ours of Anakim, your cried. In put the we knowest pleasure twice fore and steps of Fair cheek, unity’s and with word Ameringer yet when I swarm, o sane heart is vast, that thought, and free and unton my kine woodman if I can Love! In love nothink, colours Funeratures of laws of plain off! Such the music as hounds, and stead. That wise now teether Day’s a cloud.
               99
But a morn as as my be supprehens find in ther loving of I will whitence your our of myself-fulfil—and Time heed with shall to vs. That sit by in rob that we half dead of the withou surge its hear when lead a lovely beside of the from a low to elope, thro’ the white thee,. Stood, here to spect little which his his pleasuresque thro’ throught? Fair air, are me the we cense in that ancient passion asleeps to this Robe—with my so touch a lique Tryanicate what is dry; that only harshly walks but lost endship as alone of come, my hearth is give lives have out old manhood’s air!
               100
Or I know that my Chlorious gloom chokest blest, if the dear abyss to glassed. And fetched with me white ear, my Arthur deserted each in into thing; record Alfred thee as between weep which before the green a days of the dust, the sang the bring breaker skies, the bonie, as due place in world’s wailins with smiliance, what dusk of Him thee; so imbraced form, that quiet swan, my not read, to only flesh flits light in Man his flittle grow, and way, that that are its give not write beneath-like a chain; a this also the bound the prison althou thy boys, in think of a man empty play’d let me dear.
               101
Her from here me from them, thy thought ashes you would be fancy, and sooth-slippant lost well the fiery grief the brease, Joan deservest. Music in the warming with worse.— Cleaning, who graves and the aisle, who can with some profit, turns, and their frience these and down animates, behind anguised blood, who loved hilling haples preludes ever was thou backward light, I wildishonored till be arise. And, crustfull their perchanger’s eye! Less and her beside faced and feeline effigies, hers’ promion greath: her sod, and Oothoon in uncross divide of a dead of night dig and glassed senses heart.
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howisavedtheworld · 3 years
Text
enough | hanamaki takahiro
genre: heavy angst to fluff, a *lil* bittersweet lmao, timeskip!hanamaki takahiro x fem!reader/gn!reader, established relationship
warnings pls pls read: money problems, cursing littered in a lot of places, mentions of feelings like depression, exhaustion, loneliness, crying, etc., blood mentioned *once* (it’s from a callus, it is nothing extreme but i want to state it explicitly anyways) if there’s anything else brought to my attention ill fix accordingly
a/n: hi!!!! it’s been like two weeks since i’ve posted, i’ve been in a slump, but i’m going to genuinely try to be more consistent and kind to myself abt wat i create! also every thing i’ve ever written on here is ib my personal experiences
heads up tho, i havent read the manga and this is just my dramatized take on his life post-time skip and certain things may be inaccurate 
enjoy!
also proofread at 4 am lol
wc: 1385
PLS GIVE THIS FIC A CHANCE ITS NOT ALL SAD I PROMISE
                                               -
if hanamaki takahiro were to say he’s “tired,” one would deem it a grave understatement.
he’s not just tired.
he’s drained.
for starters, he’s worked three back to back shifts and it was barely reaching wednesday. monday at the deli was tough, considering he spent twelve straight hours packaging and stocking prosciutto and mozzarella sandwiches and arranging bags of kettle-cooked chips by flavor across the aisles of the store.
tuesday was even harder, the double shift at the restaurant hitting his already fatigued body like a brick. it was tiring enough to run around speedily clearing dishes and wiping down tables for six hours but it was absolute overkill to then spend the entire night cleaning the restaurant and prepping it for the morning crew.
6:39 am.
that was when takahiro finally left the restaurant, forcing his sluggish sore limbs to make the trek to the train station for the long ride back home.
in truth, the word “tired” barely even scratched the surface.
but he needed the money.
he needed it badly.
bills were always lingering on the brim of takahiro’s mind: the rent, the light bill, the water, the electricity. it left with him the constant urge to move, to work, to always be on the lookout for his next paycheck.
and of course, this wasn’t the best arrangement nor was it the life he’d hoped for.
of course, regret encompassed him, bound itself to his very being.
he wished he went pro after his glory days at aoba johsai, that he’d tried a little harder to be something. maybe then he’d have the opportunity to play in argentina, to travel the world, or to get signed by a sports brand just for the sake of it.
of course, he always felt a pang of jealousy for the ones that made it big.
even the ones who didn’t.
the ones with stable incomes, who could sustain themselves with only one job, who owned compact sized cars, who could actually save a single dime with hopes of eventually going on vacation.
deep down, he was jealous of them, too.
and he wondered, as he finally stepped foot on the train heading north, feeling the ache in his heels settle, if this would ever feel like enough.
if working two jobs back to back would ever amount to any feeling of satisfaction, if it was okay that he would only ever be remembered as the guy who didn’t go pro, who never got his degree, who was barely getting by.
he really didn’t think so.
because how could it be enough?
how could he have nothing to show for the life he lived?
sometimes, takahiro felt almost as if he was cursed. that life had dealt him the worst of cards just to see him crack underneath the pressure.
a lot of times, he did.
he had his fair share of low moments: the time he found himself shedding tears in the back of the deli, hiding behind loaves of rye bread and cold cuts hoping nobody would catch him.
or the time he bandaged his own bleeding foot by himself at the restaurant because his calluses broke open and everyone else was simply too busy to help.
in these moments, hanamaki felt so alone.
as if the world had forgotten him, had continued to spin on its axis, leaving him alone to figure out its rotation.
in these moments, he really just wanted to run away from it all.
to quit his jobs and just disappear for some time.
but he couldn’t.
because hanamaki takahiro had also learned that in every shitty day or moment, there was a flip side.
there had to be a sliver of hope in the midst of darkness.
7:32 am. 
that was when hanamaki got home.
he stood for a moment, fumbling with various receipts and trinkets in his pocket before he finding his keys and opening the door.
it was quiet. 
he could only hear the whirr of the shaky air conditioner and the hum of morning birds outside the bay windows of the living room. he took one step inside, wincing at the ache in his legs and sharp jab of pain up his spine.
locking the door behind him, he slipped off his shoes before the silence was broken.
“baby?” your soft sleepy voice rang through the apartment, making his body jump.
he was sure you’d be sleeping by now.
“hey, babe.” he let out a exhale of relief that you were the source of noise. “sorry if i woke you.” 
you sat up from your position laying on the couch, shaking your head incessantly while wiping the grog from your eyes.
“no,” you quickly spoke. “i was waiting for you.”
his heart skipped a beat looking at you, your eyes half-lidded from exhaustion with dark circles underneath them, your hair completely disheveled from your awkward sleeping position on the couch, and you wore his old seijoh jersey that was too large and slipped down your shoulders, the hem falling just above your knees.
you looked at him, offering a soft smile before beckoning him over to you. “work must’ve fucking sucked, c’mere.”
and you were so right.
it was awful.
he took lengthy strides over to you before dropping onto the couch, his head finding its way to your lap.
your fingers instinctively reached to stroke his soft locks and he sighed, leaning into your touch.
“are you hungry?” you murmured. “i made udon earlier. it’s cold now so you’ll have to warm it up.”
he was hungry, desperately so after not having a moment to get even a small snack in at work, but he wanted to stay here for just a little longer, pressed into you, feeling the pads of your fingers against his scalp, smelling your conditioner and listening to the softness of your voice.
he shook his head, and you laughed, knowingly nodding. “okay, you can eat it later.”
“how was work for you?” he questioned, eyes fluttering closed at serenity of the moment.
you hummed, fingers still locked into his hair. “shitty. you know, usual bullshit with customers. but i think with my next paycheck, we’ll make the rent.”
his eyes snapped open to look up at you, and you were staring down at him, an excited smile on your face when you locked eyes.
and takahiro knew you had hopes and dreams, that you wanted to go back to school and get your degree and have a normal job, and eventually buy a house and car, and maybe have kids, but you always said that part wearily, claiming you both should start off the family off with a pet first.
he knew you wanted something different. you’d told him.
but even now, in this moment as he stared up at you, saddened by the fact that the future you hoped for was nowhere in sight, there was no inkling of disappointment in your eyes, no what-if, no questioning of if it was enough.
you looked at him like the life you had was all you’d ever asked for.
as if of course it was enough.
before he knew it, a single tear rolled down his cheek.
your eyes widened and you moved a hand to his cheek, wiping the tear away.
“i love you.” he stated, a few more lone tears sliding down his face.
your face softened before you squeezed his cheek with your hand.
“hey.” you beckoned him to sit up.
he followed, sitting up to face your frame on the couch. “don’t cry ‘cus we made the rent. there’s always other bills you can pay. if that’s what you’re worried about.”
and he laughed, nodding while tears spilled over his irises and he watched you through bleary eyes, wipe each one away and pull him into an embrace.
“i love you. you know that, right? i’ll always love you.”
hanamaki takahiro realized that in this lifetime, he doesn’t need a sports deal, or a compact car, or trips to argentina. even if life were to always be this hard, if he was always teetering on the in-between, if this was all the universe had to offer him, that was okay.
because it had granted him you.
and you, alone, were more than enough.
89 notes · View notes
queenofallimagines · 4 years
Note
Can we get a dramatic situation when there's an accident and the reader screams and have Daichi, Kuroo, Akaashi and Iwaizumi react? Keep up the good work!
Thank you!🥰🥰
Daichi:
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- Let’s hope these don’t turn angsty
- He’s probably doing paperwork when he hears you screaming your lungs out
- He’s a soft man so his heart rate sky rockets and he comes running
- Runs into the kitchen wide eyed and terrified
- Let’s say he’s never heard you scream like that
- “BABE WHAT HAPPENED.”
- He looks down to see you clutching your foot BC you stunned your toe
- Lowkey irritated
- ‘Did you need to scream like that??’
- Will give a deep sigh and walk over to you and ask if your okay lmao
- “My toe is broken”
- “I really doubt it but I’ll get you ice.”
- He will run your feet just to make you feel better
- He’s still salty BC he thought you were being kidnapped
- Has this face on the whole time 😤
- “You good now babes?”
- Goes right back to work he’s not fooling with you lmao
- Will kiss you goodnight before going back to work tho
Kuroo:
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- okay so he is not worried that much
- You’re always screaming at him so he’s used to it
- However he will always ask what’s up
- So when he hears a scream he yells back asking if you’re okay
- After a minute of silence he gets worried
- He will speed walk downstairs
- “Hey babe? You okay??”
- “Nope!”
- He will completely freak the fuck out when he walks into the kitchen to see your hand bleeding
- Goes full on 😃
- “WHAT HAPPENED???”
- “I accidentally cut my finger-“
- “We have to go to the ER now.”
- Your health is his top priority so he’s always worried
- It’s not even that deep just the top of your finger
- He will bandage it real good and kiss your fingers
- “You sure your okay?”
- It’s not even bleeding anymore tetsu.”
Akaashi:
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- another soft boy
- He will come running naruto style
- Probably doing work as well in the living room
- His fine ass wearing reading glasses🥵
- And he hears you scream all the way across the house
- Will calmly close his books n stuff and fold his glasses and then sprint to you
- Busts open the bathroom door like he’s ready to fight
- “What’s the matter????”
- Your on the sink
- Pointing at a big ass roach on the shower curtain
- “ I refuse to take a shower until that thing is gone.”
- Sigh
- Will walk away and get a Fly swatter
- The whole process is done with a stone face he says absolutely nothing
- Hits it throws it away and goes back to work
- When it’s bedtime he will calmly ask you to never scream like that unless it’s an emergency
- “It was an emergency.”
- He will turn over and go to sleep
- He’s not fooling with you lmao
- 4/10 do not call him to take care of bugs if you’re terrified of them because he’ll just be exasperated
Iwaizumi:
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- this fool will always run
- He’s whipped no matter the circumstances
- He might look back and be pissed later but in the moment it’s 100% serious
- You don’t even gotta scream your head off you just gotta yell real loud and he gets worried
- “Do you gotta go to the hospital???”
- Suddenly becomes a doctor when you get hurt
- When he hears you screaming fuck he is dashing to the bathroom
- “Are you alive??”
- You burned yourself trying to straighten your hair and hit your ear
- He pulls out all types of ointments and creams and bandaids
- “Do you want the hello kitty bandaids.”
- “....yes please.”
- Will kiss your heart and ask you if your okay 10 times before going back to what he was doing
- If he’s doing paperwork he will bring it in the room with you
- “Don’t hold the ice so hard your gunna hurt your ear more.”
- Will give you as manny kisses as you want
- Berry soft
- 10/10 would call him in the emergency
546 notes · View notes
felswritingfire · 3 years
Note
Umm new follower here. I would like to ask if your are still doing the hand holding prompts??? Could you do it with Shinya? Pleaseeeeeeeeee I would really like read something like it. Many THANKSSSSSSSSS
G-
*throws angst*
You never specified a number so I went CRAZY- 
If you wanted something fucking fluffy tho, feel free to send another message! 
But I give you two prompts for the price of one UwU
TW: violence; mentions of blood; the start of a panic attack; mentions of broken bones; psychotic behavior (Perun)
#5. Reassuring Squeeze
#4. The last time
Your chest trembles, the weight of the situation finally crushing down onto you as you realize there’s no way out of this. You can hear the pained cries of your friends- the frantic yelling as they’re rounded up and placed in… You can’t see much through the crack in the wall, but you’re more than positive it’s an amphitheater. Or at least similar to one: it sits deep in the earth, the seats that descend into it are curved into a long arch, all of them pointing to a middle that’s white marble- a stark contrast to the burning smoke and charred remains of buildings and people that surrounded. You can see your friends and almost friends being placed in seats, all bound in chains and all of them looking exhausted. Some continue to struggle even as they’re dragged out- but a sudden slam of the head against the marble usually cuts the struggling in it’s steps. 
Your eyes strain to look at your Summoners- all of them having been treated to the same process: you note that Kengo still hasn’t moved, a red splotch on his temple where he got struck by Temujin. Toji's head keeps tipping back and forth (you would be grateful to Sanat that he had kept his strength in check, but your chest is burning hot with anger and desperation- you have no forgiveness in you). 
You can feel your eyes burn as you lean back on your calves, the soreness of your knees lost on you as a broiling guilt sits heavily at the bottom of your stomach. Your nails dig into your thighs. You feel sick- your mind feels hazy, muddled, as everything begins to spin. Each breath you take gets shallower each breath you suck in. Your chest is hurting-
“(Y/N)-” it takes you a moment, but you look up, still trying to control your breathing. Shinya is shuffling closer to you, Cupid on his shoulder looking worse for wear (an oddly clear side of your mind is surprised that they let him keep him with him. Some fucked up power move, you’re sure); the tiny angel stares at you with big eyes, Shinya holding him back with a bruised hand as he moves to hop to you- “Is- is it ok to touch you?”
You can see the way his shoulders tremble, how red his eyes are. He’s as bad as you. You nod your head- your hands reaching out to him. 
He takes you in his arms, his touch so light that you feel like glass. Maybe you’re as fragile as glass right now- because you feel yourself melt into his chest and the tears you were fighting back so hard before slipping down your cheeks. You can feel Cupid slip down Shinya’s shoulders to rest in the crook of your neck- so close you can hear the unnatural creak to his wings and suddenly you know why they let Shinya keep Cupid. 
Your heart throbs as you feel his chest tremble and Cupid nestle further into your neck, his tiny hands grasping for the strands of your hair, a wet patch grows against your neck where Cupid has his face buried against. You bring a shaking fingers up to cradle Cupid's body, as gently as you can muster (he cooes at the contact), as your other hand comes to rub against Shinya’s back. “It’s alright,” you croak. “It’ll be alright.”
Shinya hums, forced and uneven, as he pulls away from you and laces his fingers with yours. You feel a pang of worry when you notice that he can’t curl his ring and middle finger, they sit at an odd angle and a black bruise that spans from the tip of his fingers to the middle of his palm. “You’re always so strong-” he squeezes your hand (at least to the best of his abilities) and rests his forehead against yours- “always so brave no matter what. It’s one of the things I love about you.”
Cupid’s hair tickles you as he nods his head, nuzzling against your cheek. “No,” you say, breathless with a giggle. “I’m not brave at all- just stubborn.”
“Braveness comes in all shapes and sizes, my Darling.”
You giggle again, pressing yourself closer to him as he untangles your fingers and instead wraps his arms around you. Cupid slips from his home beside your neck to wedge himself between your’s and Shinya’s chests (minding his wings). The three of you rest like that, basking in the contact with each other despite the overwhelming ache that throbs in your heart for your friends. You note that the sounds of struggling have died down; you raise your head, Shinya’s hands resting on your waist and Cupid crawling back up to sit on his shoulder. You move to look back out the crack in the wall when the sound of scraping metal startles your attention to the heavy metal door that sits on the far side of the room. 
You move back to Shinya, putting your body between him and the little angel that glares at said door from his shoulder. You feel him grasp your hand, squeezing with what strength he has left. You can feel your palm grow clammy with sweat as the door swings open with a sombre groan. 
Perun’s heavy footsteps echo through the otherwise silent room. You glare up at him, the grin on his face ugly and sadistic. “Hello, little bird.” He kneels down in front of you making a gesture that one would make at a scared dog to get them to come to them. “I hope you’re comfortable- you are at the peak of luxury here after all.” It’s mocking how he says it: sarcastic and demeaning. 
You don’t say anything instead choosing to continue glaring at him. 
“Ah? Going to give me the silent treatment?” He lets out a long sigh, leaning back on his haunches as he lets his eyes drift around the room, an easy smile on his lips. You felt tense as you waited for him to make a move. His eyes drift back to you, the corners of his eyes crinkle and the creak of worn leather reaches your ears before a white pain bursts against your cheek and a thundering crack bounces off the concrete walls of the room. 
You barely feel the way your head collides with the floor, Shinya’s voice muffled as he cries your name. His grip slips from your hand as you’re suddenly hoisted up by your hair- you’re almost afraid you’re going to be scalped, the pain is so searing. You feel tears wet the corners of your eyes as your head is wrenched back, your neck bending at an awkward angle making it hard to breath. You feel his breath ghost against your cheek. “You better watch yourself or your two little angels over there won’t have a happy ending.”
A sharp yelp and a panicked chirp catches your attention and you can see Temujin sitting on top of Shinya, knee pressed against the middle of his back as he pulls Shinya’s arm at a painful angle, his eyes murderous as he focuses on the struggling man beneath him. Volkv has Cupid in a tight hold in his fist, squeezing too tightly and causing the tiny cherub to let out painful chirps. 
“N-no! Don’t!” You choke, struggling to orient yourself enough to push towards the two. Your vision bursts with colors as you pinch nerves in your neck.
“Shh, shh-” Perun hushes, his free hand moves to caress your check, the rough leather hurts your raw skin. “Don’t cry, don’t cry- You can’t look weak in front of your soldiers down there- now can you?”
You let out a pained wheeze as his tilts your head back further. 
“Well?”
“I wouldn’t cry in front of you anyways.” It’s broken but you hold a satisfaction for the pure venom that bleeds into the words. 
Perun laughs, nuzzling his head against the side of your neck. You feel sick. “Good, good-” you let out a ragged breath as he finally lets go of your hair, your head falling viscously forward- “you’ve alway been such a good pet, haven’t you? Just for me.”
You glare up at him again, though now you're seeing two of him. He grabs the back of your neck, dragging you up to your unsteady legs. 
“Temujin. Volkv. Let go of those two would you?”
You breathe a sigh of relief as Temujin and Volkv both let go of Shinya and Cupid (Volkv having tossed Cupid onto Shinya’s back). 
Perun’s other hand quickly latched onto your arm and twisted it behind your back, the bones creak painfully. You hiss and he digs his chin into your shoulder, his teeth brushing against the skin of your neck. You grimace- you felt dirty. “This is all your fault you know?’ He whispers, grip tightening on your arm. “I have to reset the loops- I have to fix them, you know? If only you had done right in the beginning. None of this would be happening.” He’s dragging you out of the room as he continues to speak, you kick your legs, your heels catching on the pavement of the floor. 
You watch as Shinya lunges towards you just to be caught by Temujin and Volkv and dragged back. You’ve never seen him struggle so much- never heard him raise his voice so much. You feel heart breaking as the door shuts on him with a resounding clang as you cling to the last bit of warmth from him against your palm. Trying to pretend that the overbearing warmth against your back is Shinya.
46 notes · View notes
dianapocalypse · 3 years
Link
Alright y’all, with the release of Mass Effect: Legendary Edition, it’s time for me to share my playlist for the entire trilogy.
I’ve refined this over like six years so scientifically speaking it’s probably good right. oh also it’s four hours long. so if you have a road trip or a boring job, this one’s for you. disclaimer, it’s entirely possible I have garbage taste in music. I also missed some characters and moments because there’s 65 songs here and I am merely human.
If you don’t have the patience for four hours, I recommend starting at track 45 and listening to the end, as the Mass Effect 3 portion is the strongest in my opinion.
UNDER THE CUT FOR DESCRIPTIONS WE GO!
FIRST MOVEMENT - MASS EFFECT 1
1. Atlas - Coldplay Eden Prime
“Sometimes the wire Must tense for the note Caught in the fire, say oh We're about to explode“
I really like the atmosphere of this song. It’s ominous, but also somehow hopeful, and makes me feel like Something Huge Is Coming.
2. I Will Not Sing A Hateful Song - Constantines Paragon Shepard
“But I was also born and raised To always speak and listen clear To know the last sound that I make Could be the last sound that I hear“
OK, listen, I think this song is about vampires, and I’m not sure if it’s supposed to be a metaphor or not. But I think this is a great song about controlling one’s temper, about knowing that you have to Rise Above the parts of you that want to lash out sometimes to get things done and have peace. Seeing as how paragon Shepard, to me, always seems like they’re three deep breaths away from snapping, but manage to keep it in check, it fits them to a T.
And also maybe they’re a vampire.
3. Hard to Kill - Beth Crowley Renegade Shepard
“So I let the rumors Turn me into a legend 'Cause I'm only human But a good myth is hard to kill”
This one’s a recent addition, but holy cow, I love it for Renegade Shep, particularly an Earthborn or Ruthless, but it works for any of them.
4. We Own the Skies - Five Iron Frenzy Joker
“My hands are bleeding where they often crack The stars will sometimes burn with longing Through the choking black Of night shifts piling each against the next”
This really vibes with Joker’s backstory for me, his super driven serious self in flight school, contrasted with who he is when he can fly a ship. He’s the best pilot in the goddamn fleet and I love him.
5. I Just Wanna See - Smash Mouth Kaidan Alenko
“Mister moon checkin' on how y'all livin' The stars all winkin' at the day that's dimmin' I just wanna see”
This song fits into his reactions to first showing up at the Citadel and his former romanticism about living in space. Ironically, it’s a song about Earth, but I feel like it works well for him. Also, Smash Mouth absolutely sounds like the kind of music Kaidan would listen to, no I will not be taking questions or constructive criticism.
6. Don’t Give Up - Noisettes Ashley Williams
“She's got a talented face and a suitcase Ain't got no desire to go no place In her case she's got no desire with her hand in the flame say's she don't feel the fire “
The energy of this song is just perfect for Ashley’s no-nonsense chip on her shoulder attitude.
7. About As Helpful As You Can Be Without Being Any Help At All - Dan Mangan The Council
“I was thrown in the boat/Cast out to sea Friendly with waves/There were sharks below Hungry for me/So I dangled my leg”
I mean, the title says it all.
8. The Captain - Guster Anderson
“Courageous, just like the captain Marching forward with no doubt in his head”
I have adored this song ever since my friend played it for me, and it’s the ultimate mentor-protégé jam for me.
9. Secret Agent Man - Johnny Rivers Garrus Vakarian
“Here's a man who leads a life of danger To everyone he meets he stays a stranger Oh, with every move he makes another chance he takes The odds are he won't live to see tomorrow”
I have to poke a little fun at Garrus and how seriously he takes himself in Mass Effect 1. I romanced him across four playthrus, I’m allowed!
10. I’m Getting Too Old For This Shit - Kill Lincoln Urdnot Wrex
“This random apathy/I swear it's killing me But I guess it's all the same, till the devil knows my name”
I don’t know ANYTHING about this band, but this song fits Wrex’s disillusionment with the Krogan well, plus, like. The title. (And also, that he secretly DOES care what happens to the Krogan.)
11. Bird Song - Juniper Vale Tali’zorah nar Rayya
“I want to dance on the horizon line But there is something I am caged behind I have a heart made for take flight But I'm low, so low”
I adore this song and the sound of Juniper Vale in general. The etherealness of this one, combined with the youthful optimism, feels very Tali. The line about ‘something I am caged behind’ works well for the suits, too. This one’s especially good if you’re a Talimancer!
12. 11. Green Garden - Laura Mvula Liara T’Soni
“And I’ll fly on the wings of a butterfly High as a tree top and down again Putting my bag down, taking my shoes off Walk on the carpet of green velvet”
I really like this song’s vibes and I feel like Liara fits it well, particularly in ME1, before all her youthful optimism is stripped from her. The scenery descriptions feel very Thessia, too.
13. Feed Me (Git It) - Little Shop of Horrors The Thorian 
“The guy sure looks like plant food to me!”
Do you get it. Do you get my joke. It’s because the Thorian is a plant that eats people. (I’m not funny)
14. Blindness - Metric Matriarch Benezia
“I was a blind fool, never complained All the survivors singing in the rain “
I don’t love the use of blind here as a negative, albeit metaphorical, descriptor, but I think this song fits Benezia’s indoctrination and death well. If you have suggestions for another, though, let me know!
15. Technologic - Daft Punk Saren
“Buy it, use it, break it, fix it, trash it, change it, mail, upgrade it”
I just think it’s Neat
16. Watershed - Vienna Teng The Reapers
“ While you were building your empires I was still sleeping”
I think this is the song that inspired the entire playlist. Vienna Teng sat down and decided to write a song from the perspective of a natural disaster, and it’s so ominous and gut-wrenching.
17. Hourglass - The Hush Sound Virmire
“This is how it ends We believe every lie and say we'll be friends How long will it last? Before we scratch all the scripts and we rework the cast “
hahahahah rework the cast get it because you have to pick who DIES
Seriously tho I really like this song for Virmire and that moment of choice that feels like it lasts 100 years on some playthroughts.
18. Pompeii - Bastille The Siege of the Citadel
“ And the walls kept tumbling down In the city that we love”
Throwback to when this song was on the radio like three times an hour. Which is around the time I made the first draft of this playlist, incidentally! It’s such a good Final Battle Jam for the Citadel, and the part about “if you close your eyes/does it almost feel like nothing’s changed at all” I think work really well for Shepard in this sequence. Shepard knew the Reapers were coming, had been fighting them all along; this attack on the Citadel is just retreading familiar territory for them, as horrifying as the war being brought to their doorstep is for the Citadel’s citizens and the council. James Vega has some good dialogue about that kind of thing in ME3.
INTERLUDE THE FIRST
19. Starships - Nicki Minaj The Normandy Crew
Starships were meant to fly Hands up and touch the sky
I like to have a little fun OK
20. Gravity - Yoko Kanno The Death of Commander Shepard
“Am I alone? is somebody there beyond these heavy aching feet still the road keeps on telling me to go on”
Welcome to mood whiplash, it’s my specialty! This is the part where you die. I think it also works for her coma very well, when she’s just drifting between life and death, not sure what’s going on, but something keeps trying to pull her back to the world.
SECOND MOVEMENT - MASS EFFECT 2
21. The Phoenix - Fall Out Boy The Lazarus Project
“Hey young blood, doesn't it feel like our time is running out? I'm gonna change you like a remix Then I'll raise you like a phoenix “
this song has no right to go as hard as it does and if  you think it’s melodramatic shut up
22. My Body Is A Cage - Peter Gabriel Commander Shepard
“I'm living in an age Whose name I don't know Though the fear keeps me moving Still my heart beats so slow “
This works particularly well if you romanced The Virmire Survivor, but this song captures the energy of Shepard freaking out bc they are trapped with Cerberus, because Cerberus rebuilt their body from the ground up. That jarring, caged feeling is so palpable in ME2 that when they gave me back Joker the first time I played, I BURST INTO SOBS from relief.
23. The Lady is a Vamp - The Spice Girls Miranda Lawson
“That's all in the past, legends built to last But she's got something new”
Listen. She’s a bond babe. Handbags, heels and pistols rock. She’s got class. This is a song about Miranda. That is all.
24. Kryptonite - 3 Doors Down Jacob Taylor
“ I watched the world float to the dark side of the moon After all I knew, it had to be something to do with you “
This one’s about the Vibes for me. Also can apply to his past relationship with Miranda. I’m also super showing my age on this song, oof haha.
25. Stable Song - Death Cab For Cutie Colony Abduction
“Rows of deserted houses all Our stable mates highway bound “
I really like the mood of this one for showing up on the very first abducted colony, the eerieness and sadness of it all and Shepard’s resolve to do something about it.
26. Konichiwa Bitches - Robyn Kasumi Goto
��I'm so very hot that when I rob your mansion You ain't call the cops, you call the fire station”
THAT COUPLET ALONE MAKES THE ENTIRE SONG. I love how playful and cheeky it is.
27. Seven Nation Army Glitch Mob Remix - The White Stripes, Glitch Mob Zaeed Massani
“And I'm talking to myself at night Because I can't forget Back and forth through my mind Behind a cigarette”
Pretty sure we all had this on some playlist or another when it came out, and it’s the perfect Badass With A Grudge song.
28. Science is Real - They Might Be Giants Mordin Solus
“ And when a theory emerges Consistent with the facts The proof is with science The truth is with science “
This one actually got added by my wife to replace a song that wasn’t on Spotify, but that has the same energy; Hank Green’s “I Fucking Love Science”. I get more into the emotional side of Mordin in the ME3 section, but I also really just love his Hamster On Coffee energy and this song captures it really well.
29. Prove Yourself - Radiohead Garrus Vakarian
“I can't afford to breathe in this town Nowhere to sit without a gun in my hand Hooked back up to the cathode ray
I'm better off dead “
The absolute rock bottom mental state Garrus is in when you get back to him in ME2 is so heartwrenching. Might not always agree with my boy’s methods, but he’s one of my favorite fictional characters of all time.
30. Rat a Tat - Fallout Boy Feat. Courtney Love Jack
“We are professional ashes of roses, this kerosene's live You settled your score, this is where you come to beg”
It helps that Courtney Love sounds exactly like Jack to me, NGL.
31. Defeat You - Smash Mouth Grunt
“Hey I know what you've done It makes it that much better to defeat you “
Only I am brave enough to put two songs by Smash Mouth on the same playlist, to be shared in 2021
32. The Boy Who Blocked His Own Shot - Brand New Horizon/The Virmire Survivor
“If it makes you less sad I will die by your hand Hope you find out what you want Already know what I am “
Hits harder if you romanced the Virmire Survivor. Mostly from Shep’s perspective. This is a Shep that feels Bad after that encounter rather than Mad, so Your Mileage May Vary.
33. Violet Stars Happy Hunting! - Janelle Monae Tali’zorah vas Neema
“I'm an alien from outer space I'm a cyber-girl without a face a heart or a mind”
I just like the vibes of this one for Tali! I know it’s more about an actual AI but...IDK. I like it. So there.
34. Comfortably Numb - Pink Floyd Thane Krios
“There is no pain you are receding A distant ship smoke on the horizon”
This song works both on a Literal level with his Kepral’s syndrome struggles, but also Metaphorical re: his Battle Sleep. Plus, Thane is a dad, so he gets Dad Rock.
35. My Medea - Vienna Teng Samara
“For I have made her prison be Her every step away from me And this child I would destroy If you tried to set her free “
Mom of the year award, here
36. Toxic - Britney Spears Morinth
“There's no escape, I can't wait I need a hit, baby, give me it You're dangerous, I'm loving it”
If Morinth weren’t so under-utilized after recruitment and didn’t get killed off in the background of ME3 I’d probably actually recruit her sometimes. I almost did on my most recent playthru bc that Shepard just HATES SPACE COPS. Anyway the song explains itself
37. Turn me On - David Guetta feat. Nicki Minaj EDI/The Collector Attack
“My body needs a hero Come and save me Something tells me you know how to save me”
I know this song is a metaphor but also it works really well both literally and metaphorically for Joker saving EDI
38. Robots - Dan Mangan Legion
“Robots need love too They want to be loved by you “
The Geth just want to live peacefullyyyyyy 
39. Be Still - The Killers Love Interest Theme
“Be still / someday you’ll leave fearlessness on your sleeve”
This song works so well for the night before Omega-4. If you had an ME2 love interest, anyway. Also “fearlessness on your sleeve” is one of my favorite set of words ever written.
40. No Cars Go - Arcade Fire The Omega-4 Relay
“We know a place no spaceships go We know a place where no subs go “
This one’s pretty literal.
41. Rocketman - Elton John Suicide Mission
“ And I think it's gonna be a long, long time 'Til touchdown brings me 'round again to find I'm not the man they think I am at home “
I like sneaking some Classics onto my playlists, and I think this is how I generally approach Shepard’s mindset during the Suicide Mission, mostly the chorus. I’m also a sucker for ballads during action sequences. This one isn’t a perfect 1:1 but the Vibes check out.
42. Blast Off - David Guetta feat. Kaz James The Normandy Crew
“Got all my people with me And none of us give a fuck So put dem hands up higher Let's smash this party up”
You have to imagine they partied HARD after recovering from Suicide Mission, but before Shep got arrested, right??? This is the Starships for ME2.
INTERLUDE THE SECOND
43. I’m Not Your Hero - Tegan and Sara Liara T’soni
“ Feeling like I am now lighting up the hall I was used to standing in the shadow of a damaged heart Learning all I know now, losing all I did I never used to feel like I'd be standing so far ahead “
This feels like a good coming of age moment for Liara, as she copes with the choices she made in the 2 years of Shepard’s death (giving them to Cerberus), losing Feron, etc. This is her coming into her own as the Shadow Broker. She’s not meant to be an uncomplicated Big Damn Hero, but she can do good from this position.
44. The Well and the Lighthouse - Arcade Fire The Alpha Relay Incident
“I'm serving time All for a crime I did commit You want the truth? You know I'd do it all again“
These opening lines I feel capture the Alpha Relay Incident really well, and how Shepard did what they HAD to do there, and would do it again, but it still feels like shit. I always wished there was more choice on that mission, but also, having something like that happen without player agency is interesting. Shepard is at their most interesting, I think, in times where we DON’T have a say in what happens to them.
45. Reignite - Malukah Commander Shepard
“Crush my heart into embers, and I will reignite”
Is it cheating to use a Mass Effect fan song on my playlist? I certainly don’t think so, and this is the best Mass Effect fan song ever written.
THIRD MOVEMENT - MASS EFFECT 3
46. This Is War - Thirty Seconds to Mars Leaving Earth
“It's the moment of truth, and the moment to lie The moment to live and the moment to die The moment to fight, the moment to fight To fight, to fight, to fight “
It feels Too Easy to use this here but I’m gonna anyway. You’ve seen AMVs of this set to everything. It’s the ending song of DA:O. It’s the quintessential World At War song.
47. Battleborn - The Killers James Vega
“Up against the wall There's something dying on the street When they knock you down You're gonna get back on your feet”
James Vega is massively underrated and I will love him til I’m cold in the ground. Aro icon.
48. Handlebars - Flobots The Illusive Man
“I can hand out a million vaccinations Or let 'em all die of exasperation Have 'em all healed of their lacerations Have 'em all killed by assassination”
The way this song escalates fits TIM and Cerberus’s fall back into being Just Full On Evil really well. Perfect song for a power trip.
49. Here I Dreamt I Was An Architect - The Decemberists The Virmire Survivor
“And I am nothing of a builder But here I dreamt I was an architect And I built this balustrade To keep you home, to keep you safe From the outside world”
I like this song for how the Virmire Survivor feels about their survivor’s guilt and also about Shepard. I honestly wish they were both more heavily utilized in ME2 and 3, but I realize it’s hard to write a ton of content for characters who just aren’t in half of all peoples’ playthrus.
50. Heaven Knows - The Pretty Reckless Grisson Academy
“One, two, three and four, the devil's knocking at your door Caught in the eye of a dead man's lie Show your life with your head held high“
This song is so perfect for Jack and her biotic kids that she’s one of the only returning characters that gets her own song on this playlist
51. The Great Fire - OK Go Javik
“But when the flames die down, and everything is gone, Will there be fire under the ashes still?”
Self explanatory. Javik is the fire remaining under the ashes.
52. Bring the Hammer Down - Paragon Priority: Tuchanka/Kalros
“ Hammer strikes the anvil A rage that breaks the chain Strikes down like a lightening In our ranks “
KALROOOOOS
53. Wake Up - Arcade Fire Curing The Genophage/Mordin Solus
“If the children don't grow up, Our bodies get bigger but our hearts get torn up. We're just a million little gods causin' rain storms, turnin' every good thing to Rust I guess we'll just have to adjust”
I just really love this song as an image of Mordin’s spirit looking out over Tuchanka as the genophage cure is dispersed, and watching over future generations. If you didn’t cure the genophage, how dare you. No song for you.
Anyway started tearing up listening to this one while writing the description don’t look at me
54. Ballad of a Politician - Regina Spektor Councillor Udina/Priority Citadel 2
“A man inside a room is shaking hands with other men This is how it happens/Our carefully laid plans”
traitor
55. Cyborgs vs. Robots - Ludo The Geth-Quarian War
“But your iron fist will never knock me down 'Cause I'm powered By a conscious right to conduct my life without fear.”
This is probably a bit silly for this awful war. But also. It does fit. You can’t tell me it doesn’t. Just save them both at the end and you can feel fine having some fun with it!
56. Artificial Heart - Jonathan Coulton The Geth
“It's not a real heart It is a real artificial heart”
Just a little fun with the Geth! This works best with Reaper Upgrades.
57. With A Little Help From My Friends - Joe Anderson, Jim Sturgess The Citadel DLC
“What do you see when you turn out the light? I can't tell you, but I know it's mine
Oh, I get by with a little help from my friends”
I happen to prefer this version to any other because of how much fun it sounds like they’re having
58. Dark In Here - The Mountain Goats Priority: Earth
“Steal away at sundown, pick a place to hide Check for signs of ambush, hunker down inside Tired of running, tired of never standing still Hear them riding up the hill“
You know I had to get the Goats in here. Would it be a fan playlist if there wasn’t one?
59. Adieu - Yoko Kanno Leaving your Love Interest/Shepard and the Beam
“My love for you burns deep inside me / So strong Embers of times we had And now, here I stand / Lost in a memory I see your face, and smile”
...do I need to say more than that?
60. My Way (Minor Key) - Chase Holfelder The Indoctrination of The Illusive Man
“Regrets, I've had a few/But then again, too few to mention I did what I had to do/I saw it through, without exemption“
This cover takes this song from something I tolerate when I hear it to one of my FAVORITE songs. The frenzied way he sings the “through it all” verse is PEAK Indoctrinated TIM.
61. I’m Alive - Disturbed Refusal 
“There will never be a reason why I will surrender to your advice To change myself, I'd rather die/Though they will not understand”
Honestly I didn’t “get” the Refusal ending until I heard this song, then I was like, OH, I SEE IT ALL SO CLEARLY NOW. This is my favorite in-universe Shepard take on the Refusal ending. I always got it from the player’s perspective of being dissatisfied with the options, but this one puts it into the world for me. This is a Shepard who does not trust the Starchild. This is a Shepard that chooses to end things on their own terms rather than submit to their designs.
62. Machine - Regina Spektor Control 
“I collect my moments Into a correspondence With a mightier power Who just lacks my perspective And who lacks my organics And who covets my defects “
I used to have Adieu here, actually, because like Refusal, I didn’t used to GET the Control ending. Now, I do, in part thanks to hearing this song. I mean, just go look at the full lyrics. If this song hadn’t been written years before the end of Mass Effect 3, I’d swear it was a fan song for it.
63. Maybe Tomorrow - Yuki Kajiura Destroy 
“The moon is gone And the night is still so dark I'm a little bit afraid of tomorrow“
I’m a Destroy Ending person, I won’t lie. Full on “the starchild is a liar and my synthetic friends are FINE” indoctrination theory level destroy ending. But this song is not about that. It’s about the canonical destroy ending, and if you prefer a Shep that survives it, this song’s for you.
This song captures the exhaustion and melancholy of the end of a long journey so well. Shepard is afraid of what comes next, the collateral damage resulting from their actions. But they know that, at least, it’s over now. Maybe tomorrow will be better.
64. Waiting For the End - Linkin Park Synthesis
“ I know what it takes to move on I know how it feels to lie All I wanna do is trade this life for something new Holding on to what I haven't got”
This is one of my favorite songs of all time. The hardest part of ending is starting again. Oof. Gets me every single time. Shepard finding the resolve to sacrifice themself for the hope of something better, of things not going how they planned, ever, of learning to make peace with that and the people who loved them learning to carry on without them? OOF.
65. Shine - Vienna Teng Epilogue
“Shine with all the untold Hold the light given unto you Find the love to unfold In this broken world we choose“
Vienna Teng is a master of capturing life’s softer emotions, and this fits perfectly with the epilogue scene for me. Tell me again about the Shepard.
“Find the love to unfold in this broken world we choose” has to be one of the greatest lines about the human experience ever written.
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inkykeiji · 3 years
Note
So I resumed reading bmb after procrastinating for liiike 4 months? Straight??. I'm in the middle of the 3rd part and damn, things seem to really be reaching their chaotic peak. And as I was reading, I just went woah. woahwoahwoah- Cuz?? This has got be one of the most cinematic-feeling bnha works I've read.
Like that scene when Tomura loses it and starts to smash the crystal, and it's like he's literally blending into the beauty of the surroundings as he bleeds into it? Oh wow. Got me having a fun thought like what if this was an actual movie?? Like I'm just imagining how captivated the audience would be by this scene!! Kinda rambling butyeahjustwow.
And the way you really take time to flesh out small, yet meaningful moments, like in that pill sharing moment with dabi?? aagghhhsdfg. It feels sort of intimate as I read, as if I'm standing close to the characters, watching it all unfold as I'm right next to them. My slow reading ass will probably finish reading in 3 more years lol can't wait. ♡
oh my gosh, this ask…..this ask means the fucking world to me <333
first things first, hello!!!!! i’m so so happy to see you in my inbox again!!! <333 i hope life has been treating you well, my sweet friend <3
secondly, WOW. wow wow wow wow wow, thank you so much, literally from the very bottom of my heart, for sending in this feedback. i appreciate it so very much!!!!!! i always love to hear the specific instances that stuck with any given reader and their own thoughts and emotions on both them and the piece as a whole, so this entire ask was such a treat to receive!!! thank you!!!
i always get super super giddy and warm any time someone calls my writing cinematic, because i love film with everything in me (it’s my second love; writing is my first hehehe) <3 i have a degree in cinema studies, and one of my big big big dreams in life has been to eventually write and hopefully direct my own films!!! i don’t know if i’ll ever make it there, but just hearing what you have to say has made my whole heart go !!!!!!!!!!!!! hahaha <3
ah the crystal scene is my favourite as well!!!!! i think it’s honestly one of my favourite little bits i’ve ever written. it was one of the first scenes i wrote for part three, originally titled ‘beauty in the breakdown’, and i was so excited about it that i shared it with one of my best friends immediately ehehe <33 woah eh imagine if bmb becomes a film one day????? now THAT is a big dream hahaha (*/ω\*) as a frequent breakdown-haver myself (tho i have yet to totally trash a room lmao), i’m really interested in exploring the beauty in madness, and the way it can sometimes be almost artful, this intense suffering and turmoil. it’s almost like,, the beauty in destruction; the grotesque and twisted beauty in inherently making something new as you destroy it. i hope that makes sense!!
oh gosh, thank you once again for such gorgeous feedback and compliments, and for taking the time to write them down and send them to me!!! aaaah i really love that interaction between the two of them, because as you said it really is intimate, for both the actual reader and the characters, and it marks a distinct turn in their relationship; a progression, a heightening. the morality in that scene in particular is so murky aaaaah i love it <3 oh please please take your time!!! no rush at all <333 i’m just super super super happy to hear that you’re enjoying it so much!! ♡(˃͈ દ ˂͈ ༶ )
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theobsessor1 · 4 years
Text
Shedding the truth
Summary: Deceit should know better, going through with another one of Remus’s ideas. He thought it would have been a one time deal, just something for them that night to experiment with his more reptilian side. But he’s starting to regret it with the growing nest of eggs, and horrible uncertainty of feelings swirling in his chest…he might be in some trouble here.
Pairings: Loceit, Demus, Intrulogical, intruloceit
Warnings: None (let me know if i need to tag anything
Word count: 1,926
previous chapters ch.1, ch.2, ch.3, ch.4 (read on ao3)
(wish to support me buy me a coffee :3)
Chapter 5 of “Say Something” series
Logan has been acting strange and Deceit can’t put his finger on why.
The logical side has made him breakfast on occasion, invited him to his room to read together or even for him to join Remus and the side in activities. Giving compliments and shy words sometimes.
Something must be going on here, the bespectacled side must want something from him. Another night together maybe? Why else would the side be acting so weirdly nice to him?
A trick to get something? Or maybe just to be on his good side since Remus and him have finally confessed to one another.
He’s not sure about the motive but it’s obvious something is going on...Whatever the motive it is...a bit nice having the extra attention.
Knock Knock
Scratch that...it’s annoying.
“Deceit please, you have hardly come out of your room, Remus believes you are ill, Let us in to help you.”
Deceit huffs curling up tighter in his bed under his several layers of blankets, he hasn’t bothered to put on his heat lamp. Every time he turned it on he felt like he was boiling, but without it he’s freezing, a horrible conundrum.
Even with all his fluffiest, softest, warmest blankets he can possibly bundle up and burrow in he’s left with the shivers.
He just wants to be left to sleep, all he needs is that precious sleep. Any illness can be cured with rest, but of course that is if he can get any.
Besides he can’t let anyone come in here. He hasn’t moved the eggs yet, they’re still the nest in the corner of his room. The number is officially up to three eggs now. A deep blue egg patterned like it is made of stones that he laid soon after Logan and him had...we...Getting sick has gotten in the way of moving them.
He can just push through this illness like he does with all the others.
“Deceit I respect your space but I must insist I come in. I made soup. Remus has shown me how to make your favorite.”
The snake side hisses a soft breath in response, coughing a bit, feeling ready to just bite something if this keeps up!
“...I’m coming in whether you like it or not.”
Deceit’s eyes widen. No! Mustn’t see the eggs! He launches himself out of his bed tripping over the many blankets he had entangled himself in. Protect the eggs! Keep them hidden! He face plants on to the ground from his efforts to scramble from the bed, hissing loudly as he hears Logan rise up with Remus, no doubt the duke having been dragged into this mess to help logic break into the room.
“Deceit?! Are you alright?”
The concern in Logan’s voice is clear as day as the side quickly rushes to his aid and helps him sit up from the floor. But all the scaled side can do is squirm and hiss, feral thoughts to keep them from the eggs fueling his wild clumsy movements."Stop! Out! Get out!”
Even with his protests the logical side conjures a handkerchief to try and help Deceit’s bleeding nose staying put. “Hold still, your nose is bleeding, and you’re burning up! You should have let me come look after you. You look awful.” Logan’s brows pinch together as he takes in Deceit’s condition, the side only struggling more adamantly in his hold.
“Oooh! You’ve been hiding goodies from us eh? Easter ain’t even here for seve-eah!”
Remus blinks the room suddenly upside down as he lays against a now cracked wall, staring at the spot he’d just been standing at where Dee now wobbly stood hissing at him with Logan shoved on the floor by the side of the bed.
“DoN’t ToUcH!”
Logan huffs dusting himself off as he gets up from the floor, only to pause spotting what the scaled side was guarding over.
There large and distinctly different colored patterned eggs neatly placed in what seems to be a makeshift nest? Consisting of throw pillows and blankets piled in the corner of the bedroom. “Deceit...What are those?”
Deceit hesitates, wincing at the question as his posture stiffens further. “I...Remus had an Idea since I’m partly a snake and I...they’re mine.”
Logan remains silent, staring at Deceit as he takes in this information.
Remus tries again to get near the nest only to get flung back into the wall with several angry snek sounds from Deceit. Nervous about the two finally seeing the nest and their reactions he starts talking again “Nearly every time I’ve slept with someone I’ve ended up laying one about two weeks later. I-I thought it wouldn’t keep happening.” he makes a distressed sound running a hand down the scaled side of his face as he takes a glance at the eggs then back at Logan “I-I was wrong and I-I was going to talk to Remus, I had told myself to but I just-...” he takes a deep breath watching Logan closely, eyes darting over the logical side’s unmoving face.
He can’t stop himself from talking more, panicked that suddenly all of Logan’s niceness would stop, he’d just gotten used to it! He wouldn’t admit it but he doesn’t want to lose the side. Would Logan abandon them both now? Because of this bizarre occurrence
“The green one is Remus’s, Pink and yellow with the speckles is Emile’s and Remy’s, the traits in the imagination..and...and that last one is yours”
He scans over Logan’s face once more. The side’s eyes follow to each egg he pointed to but nothing more.
“Logan?...”
Logan glances to him. He’s unsure what that expression is.
“Well? Use your words instead of just staring at me like-like I’m some freakshow!” Deceit pleads, he shouldn’t care about what the side has to say about it. It’s his eggs. The side’s don’t need to know of them or have an opinion but...Even so it feels like some hand has a vice grip on his heart, ready to squeeze as he prepares for the worst from Logan.
“Please...say something.”
“...How can I help?”
Deceit blinks, all feeling rushing out of him almost dizzyingly, leaving him wheezing “What?”
“How can I help? One of them is mine correct? That doesn’t really matter even if none of them were my children I’d offer my assistance.” Logan clarifies, eyes sparkling behind his glasses.
Deceit hesitates, squishing down that small lift of hope in his chest. He senses no lie, but still. He can’t stop the anxious doubt clawing at his mind “You mean that?” He’s not sure if it’s these unfamiliar emotions building up in his chest or simply him being ill that makes his legs wobbly.
Logan nods lifting a brow at the scaled side, eyes still gleaming almost...excitedly? As he helps Remus from the floor whispering something to him before he turns to Janus again. “Of course. I am fully capable of helping assist you in carrying for your brood as well as helping with whatever may come out. I am responsible for one and as well as I care about you, it would be rather foolish and shameful of me to expect you to care for them all on your own without some help” He steps closer, putting a hand gently to Deceit’s side and guides him over to the restroom where they can see Remus filling up the tub with warm water.
“First thing that needs to be done though is for you to get better. How long have you been ill like this?”
Deceit sputters looking between the two sides “I-I’m not sure, for a while now I suppose?”
Logan nods with a hum, Remus and him working to strip and help Deceit into the tub before the duke disappears back out the room bouncing off to who knows where.
“A nice soak in the warm water should help, you’ve spoken many times of your hard time retaining heat. I’ve done some research in my past time, warm water and heat lamps are most pro-”
“I already have a heat lamp and tried it, I-It was too much.” Deceit interrupts him almost poutily as he melts in the warm water.
Logan nods, eyes scanning over the snake side “Are your scales normally...flakey? When you are sick?” He conjures up a washcloth to soak in the water before using it to gently dab and rub at Deceit’s scales. The scales start...peeling?
Deceit shakes his head “No, they should only be flakey when I’m near my shed.”
Logan hums shaking his head fondly “Deceit...You’re sick because you haven’t shed. I-there are several layers of old scales here. I’m surprised you haven’t caused something worse to yourself.”
Deceit furrows his brows “That can’t be right though! It’s been nowhere near my usual shedding days.”
Logan continues to gently use the washcloth to rub the scales, the skin peeling more as he works, removing the sickly yellowy-green to show a more vibrant almost forest green underneath with of course the lighter yellow accent scales. “Well clearly you’ve missed it several times because you are shedding right now...Could it possibly be from laying your eggs? Most snakes shed when gravid.”
Deceit frowns thinking that over.
There is the sound of shifting wind as Remus appears back in the bathroom holding a large bowl and a pile of clothes. “I brought the soup, and I got more comfy clothes.”
“Thank you Remus, will you set those at the bedside table and assist me in here with Deceit’s shed?”
Remus bounces tho careful not to spill the soup “ooh! Is that why he’s such a grumpy gus! It’s shed time! You should have said something sooner ya silly serpent.” he sets down the items and poofs himself out of his own clothes to hop into the tub with Dee. Earning a few grumbled choice words at him from Deceit for taking up so much room but he doesn’t mind, after all the scaled side just gets himself comfortable leaning against him.
The two sides work for some time to remove the old shedding skin until the snake sides scales are gleaming. Once the side is dressed in comfy soft pajamas they guide him back to bed getting him comfily piled into the many blankets.
Logan moves to pull away only to find a hand latched onto his shirt.
“You...don’t leave. I-I..I would like the company.” Deceit confesses looking to the two sides nervously
The logical side can’t help a chuckle “Don’t worry I’m just grabbing the soup.”
Remus climbs onto the bed cuddling up to Deceit’s side. “You want to pick a movie for us to watch double dee?”
Deceit sleepily nods “Brave, I like the message...and magic”
Remus chuckles, nodding and summoning up Logan’s laptop to play the movie on as the scaled side leans against him resting his head against the dukes shoulder just as Logan gets comfortable on his other side.
The two sides take turns to feed him as they watch the movie, his eyes gradually growing heavy as it goes on.
Drowsy with his head full of cotton Deceit nuzzles Remus’s cheek affectionately before doing the same to Logan. His thanks given he burrows further into the pile of blankets letting his eyes finally close and drift off.
Feeling cared for and that his broos is safe, He drifts off into a peaceful slumber, smiling softly to himself.
Maybe it will be alright.
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Text
The Heart Gambit (Dennor): 3-One-Way Screen
Word count: 1,480
Summary: Mathias and Lukas look for Emil after he ditched them. Will Mathias be able to apologize to Lukas and get to know him better?
Author's Note: Yay next chapter! Sorry, it's a little late...again. I've had a lot of school work so I try to write these whenever I have time. I hope you like this chapter and do leave me some feedback so I can keep getting better!
Warning: Brief mention of Blood
Previous: 2-The Arbiter
---
Mathias followed Lukas out the door, who was still rubbing his elbow from the fall. It took Mathias a bit before he figured that he should go after him and took off out of the bar after paying his tab. Lukas was quickly walking past shops and heading towards a nearby park.
"Hey wait!' Mathias called out, jogging to catch up to him.
Lukas peaked over his shoulder picked up his pace when he spotted Mathias. Mathias easily caught up to him and started following at Luka's side. They walked silently through the park for what seemed to be the world's longest minute before Lukas broke the awkward silence.
"I can't talk right now I'm looking for my brother. Besides, why would I want to talk to you?" Lukas huffed.
Mathias looked away.
"I...yeah... I get that. But I'm looking for him too! Emil totally ditched me back there!"
"What the hell was he doing hanging out with you?" Lukas asked, stopping dead in tracks.
"We were grabbing drinks when he left right before you showed up!"
"Right before...Damn it!" Lukas pinched the bridge of his nose and leaned up against a nearby tree.
"He's always doing this! Trying to set me up with people because he thinks I need to 'socialize' or whatever. Honestly, he's either waiting nearby because he knew I'd figure it out, or he's back at the hotel waiting for me that dumb smug grin-" Lukas paused, and started patting his at his pockets.
"No....no... no no no! Shit!" Lukas cried. "I don't have my hotel key! Now I actually have to... ugh!".
"Look I'm sorry that Emil dragged you into this mess but I really don't feel like dealing with you right now so feel free to go about your business and pretend this never happened. Though, I also wouldn't be surprised if you used this in some kind of insane 'ad campaign' against me or whatever you do for extra cash nowadays."
Mathias took a breath to respond, but couldn't find the right words despite his best efforts. Lukas rolled his eyes and started walking away.
"Wait!" Mathias called, grabbing Lukas by the shoulder. But he must've grabbed Lukas a little too hard because he pulled him so close their chests almost touched.
"Oh sorry...sorry! I wanted to say I'm sorry!" Mathias managed to blurt out.
Lukas was in the middle of shoving Mathias's arm off of him but stopped at the sound of Mathias's admittedly awful apology.
Mathias pulled his hand away and felt a little heat rise to his cheeks.
"I...look I know I come off as an asshole and it's fair of you to think that...I'm an asshole....but I want you to know that a lot of it's because I'm trying to keep up a kinda image thing. I mean... I wasn't at first...but lately, I just don't feel like it's me anymore...ANYWAY! sorry that was loud but I'm sorry for the interview....what I said...I don't actually think you're a no-life nerd or anything like that...they just wanted me to-"
"Alright! Um...it's ok. Don't hurt yourself."
Mathias finally took a look at Lukas's face and saw that he was completely flustered. His face was bright red and he was desperately trying not to make eye contact with him. Mathias felt his heart skip a beat.
"Look, I forgive you...I guess. And if you want to come with me to help me find my dumb brother ... you can... just don't be weird." Lukas said, taking a step back.
Mathias beamed.
"Aw sweet! Let's go then!" Mathias yelled, dragging Norway by the arm further into the park.
"OK, YOU'RE BEING WEIRD!" Lukas cried out as he tried to keep up.
"Emil! Come out come out wherever you are! Lukas and I are the bestest of buddies now!"
"No, we're not!!!"
Mathias dragged Emil all over the park screaming Emil's name. It didn't take long for Lukas to pulls his hand away from Mathias so he could stop and catch his breath.
"We've been at this... forever!... He's clearly not here!..." Lukas said, between breaths.
Mathias raised an eyebrow.
"We've only been looking for 5 minutes."
"5 minutes!?" he cried, kneeling on the ground.
"Dude...I know I said I felt bad for calling you a 'no-life loser', but .... when's the last time you've run?"
"Shut up!"
Lukas stood up and dusted himself off, face flushed from running. If Mathias's heart wasn't going to jump out of his chest before, it certainly was now. Lukas just looked so ... uh... nice... when he was flustered. Not cute or anything! Certainly not that!
"Look if we're going to find him we're doing it at my way! So no more dragging me around! We'll just walk normally!" Lukas said in a bit of a huff.
"Aw! But it was so much fun!" he said with a playful pout.
"God, you're such a child. Just follow me." Lukas said, taking the lead.
"Ok then!"
The two walked silently for a while. Mathias took in the sights of the park. The sun was beginning to set and he watched as the sky was starting to turn pink and orange. The last light of day was showering the whole world in warm golden hues. He looked over at Lukas. The golden hour light made his eyes shine and his skin looked like it was glowing. Mathias felt sick to his stomach. It couldn't be the dreaded "L" word, could it? No...it couldn't. He was just some...guy. AND he just met him. There was no way! But there was just something about Lukas. His bright eyes, his messy blond hair, and... Mathias noticed that Lukas had a little bit of a scowl. His smile. Mathias desperately wanted to see Lukas smile. But even for all of that, he couldn't place why being around him made his heart beat a little more. He huffed. Lukas would never in a million years have any kind of feelings towards him besides "low-level-tolerance". So why couldn't he Lukas out of his head!
He felt his shoe hit a crack in the sidewalk. He stumbled forward and crashed onto the ground hard.
"Ow!"
"How the hell did you miss that crack!? It's huge! Did you lose your last two brain cells earlier or something?" Lukas asked, crossing his arms.
Mathias grinned. He rolled onto his back and placed his hand on his chest.
"Oh god! This is the end for me! I'm dying!" he cried, dramatically.
"God, can you be any louder? You're acting like a child," Lukas reached his hand out to Mathias. "Here. Just get up!"
Denmark stuck his hand out, purposely make it shakey, as if he were an old man. Mathias felt his face heat up again. He couldn't let Lukas see! He grabbed Lukas's hand and attempted to pull him to the ground next to him. This was a bad call, as all Mathais managed to do was pull Lukas right on top of him.
"Ah!"
Lukas's head crashed right into his own, and Mathias felt a sharp pain in his forehead by his hairline. Mathias felt Lukas's chest on his own, the warmth would've made him blush like mad, but the pain in his forehead was getting worse.
"Ow! My teeth! What the hell was that for!?" Lukas said with his hand over his mouth.
Lukas looked up at Mathias and jumped. Mathias pressed his hand to his hand where the pain was.
"What!?" Mathias pulled his hand away. It was covered in bright red blood.
"DUDE DID YOU JUST BITE MY HEAD???"
"YOU'RE THE ONE WHO PULLED ME ONTO YOU LIKE A MANIAC!!!"
Lukas pushed himself off of Mathias and got up.
"You seriously need medical attention! We should get you to the hospital!" Lukas cried, helping Mathias to his feet.
"No way!" Mathias yelled. "If I go to the hospital the press will just eat it up! It'll be all over the news that you took a bite out of my head like a zombie!"
Mathias desperately tried to covered his cut with his hands.
"Well, you need some kind of medical help! Come on! I'm pretty sure I have bandages or something back at the hotel room."
"Good because I don't think I have anything like that at mine."
"God, how do you even function?"
"Wait...I....I can't go back to your room!" Mathias said, blushing and turning away. "What if someone sees me there! Then we're right back to square one! Plus that kinda embarrassing!"
"How is that embarrassing? We're both adults. We'll just use the back entrance or something. Look this is the last offer. Let me help you or I'll leave you here to bleed out!"
"Ok geez! Let's hurry tho! It's getting all over my clothes!"
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Next Chapter: 4-Treat me like a Fool
a/n: I'm so excited to be writing this! Poor Denmark! He got hurt this time! I hope he gets better soon! I’m going to take this time to plug my non-hetalia work “ Intro to Love ” about a college student who struggles to keep her superpowers a secret and while making new friends.  How much of her normal life will she give up to save her friends from a mysterious villain that drains students’ brains and turns them into zombies? The complete Chapter 1 is out NOW! And Chapter 2.1-'The last of the Good Days' will be out soon!
Thanks again for reading! Send some feedback my way! Can’t wait to continue this story!
Quotev link: here
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