#I MAKE EVERYTHIGN UP
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I need to rewrite all of professor pericles. like as a whole
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demoposting again. been too caught up in imagining happy fwb vere/ais im now coming back the other angle implied by this & the fact that he seriously warns mc to stay away from the seaspring: toxic yaoi
under the cut so i don't detract from the punchline— i genuinely don't think this is just Vere trying to keep MC away from Ais because he wants him all to himself. I think it's definitely a possible part of it, but Vere really means his warning to MC about the danger that being around Ais poses...bro loves him but he's not about to get himself killed by Ocudeus for a chance to save him...he knows him well enough to know that he can't save him. do you see my vision. can anyone hear me
#shitboxposting#touchstarved game#i can make anything into toxic yaoi. this is because everythign is about toxic yaoi but in this case its not even a stretch or a reach#what does a killer do when he knows he can't kill whatever has a hold on Ais? he gives up. heart emojis. listne to me listen to me#vere is my babygirl princess now. i love him. what a bitch
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WERE SOOO BACK
#my art#qsmp#qsmp fanart#elmariana#slimecicle#qsmp slimecicle#qsmp el mariana#el mariana#crying throwing up I missed them so much#I forgot everything that I was going to say but god. this vod really makes my brain explode literally everythign of this reunion made me ex#-expldoe I feel so insane
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My bro’s talking to me about what i was like when i was high on LMK and it’s insane that i knew something had changed sound-wise thirty seconds into ep1 of s5 and found out AFTER that the sound mixing studio or whatever had changed. who notices stuff like that man???? I was absolutely deranged
#Knox rambles#truly i was insane about it#I kinda miss that ngl#i miss being that deranged man#seasons 1-3 my beloved#tell me how i noticed the sound design change when the anim was the most obvious blatant change#tell me how that was so loud and obviously different and yet somehow i still noticed the differences in SOUND#they use the same effects they didn’t even change the sound DESIGN it was just the MIXING of it and i noticed that#i was absolutely insane about lmk MAN#ig that’s what you get when you spend hours over the course of years making edits and listening to the sound effects background music and#line delivery and making it all match up to music#there was some kind of rhythm that previous studio somehow managed to capture that the new one just did not have it’s so wild how everythin#can make such a big impact we don’t appreciate sound mixing enough#i mean i definitely gushed over it a lot personally but i still feel like i didn’t appreciate it enough lmk gave me everythign MAN#it was a work of ART#always gonna miss that
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What’s your favorite book?
cadenza's diary
#i haven't written in my diary for a really long time no wonder i'm fucked up aahhhaha. haha. lmao. and so forth.#i wonder if she's kept up with hers. i wonder if she still leaves me notes#YOU GUYS HAVE TO STOP MAKING EVERYTHIGN ABOUT CADENZA. THIS IS YPOUR FAULT.#NO I'M NOT PROJECTIGN
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quite simply character of all time to me i keep coming back to doing screenshot redraws of Shiro in fall of the castle of lions & tears of the balmera. episodes of all time to me no notes.
#voltron#vld#my art#i wanted to make it so the lighting from the fighting pose effected the lighting of the other three scenes which was a fun challenge#lance mcclain#takashi shirogane#lance#shiro#shiro voltron#lance voltron#one of the things about vld that is a little treat for me is that i love teal and purple and pink glowing stuff and so many things glow#im tempted to go back and brighten up the fighting pose bc i colored it first and it ended up a bit darker than everythign else but also i#i have been working on this for TOO long i want it done#my passion and hobby is taking the boo boo lines on cartoons and making them real scabs and bruises and blood#i love when shiro is an unstoppable force that will ignore injury to his own body without hesitation to win a fight i love him so much#blorbo of all time forever to me i wish i could save him from being in voltron bc after s2 it only treated him BAD#sh*ladins will be blocked
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NewAgeAU Drabble - Nine does not equal Ten
Hi @spotaus ! I am not even sorry at this point!! I had an idea and I think by the title you can guess what it is about this time :3
We are in post story again! (i am keeping my strike going lmao) but this time? very different character. Nine :3 (also. Xundyne's name for now is Ranha, from piranha... because she is a fish monster and well... I wanted a fish themed name for her lmao)
Also warning. Nine think very degrading and judgemental. in case that bothers you.
He is also a very unreliable narrator lmao.
*----------------*
Nine makes sure to frown as he crosses his arms while his king, and co-king honestly, disappear into the meeting room with the brat that calls himself a king.
Nine only acts annoyed of course. He knew he wouldn't be allowed into the meeting room and he had been planning on it. It is hard to search this place if he is suposed to be in one room.
Ranha stands by his side, huffing and puffing as she mutters stuff under her breath. She is honestly annoyed with not being allowed inside the meeting room. Nine is sure she will be fine with it after he shares his plan.
Nine watches the brat acting as king lead his own king and his right hand inside. They would both be named king after the coup but the resistance hadn't wanted to push the people of Ritten too far. Nine watches as the crown prince, prince Dream, follows the child and Nine still doens't understand why Dream hasn't taken the crown yet. It can't be that hard to take the power from the younger skeleton. How Nightmare is still seen as king is a mystery to Nine.
Sure it seems like things are okay after three years but Nine knows not to bindly believe people. He had hoped that Ten would have finally learned that lesson by now but it seems that wasn't the case. But that is okay. Nine will be the great brother he was meant to be and get through to Ten and get him home. Easy.
The meeting room door closes and Nine nudges his best friend "Hush." and he nods towards the side. Ranha tilts her head and her red hair shifts slightly. She glances at the door before following him down the hallway.
"What is the big deal Nine?" She seems puzzles.
Nine looks back over his shoulder but nothing happens. Hah. See? And this is why Nightmare still being seen as king is a mystery to him. Those Knights are nothing but hot air as he doesn't even see any of them following him, no wonder Ten got accepted into the role so quickly, the knights clearly can't spot a single threat even when it is right in front of them. All he sees behind them is a prestine looking cat watching them.
"I knew they weren't going to let us join the meeting."
Ranha looks annoyed "Then why did you ask me to join you? I could be exploring the town and checking the stalls and stuff! See what people really think about their weird king and the weirdos here." the shark monster huffs.
Nine rolls his eyes "Because I am in the castle now. Which means I can finally find Ten and talk some sense into him."
Ranha stares shocked before she smiles broadly "Nine you are a genius! Lets go!"
Nine grins as he waves Ranha to follow him.
It isn't the first time he is in this castle. It is the fourth now. Each time Nine would just watch and wait only to not see Ten. This time he is going to search himself. Nine is lucky that Nightmare is a brat and clearly inexperienced with getting allies as it is taking his king and the brat king ages to get a treaty finalised. Honestly how Orchard managed to get Sanctuary as ally is still a mystery but Nine doesn't have time to figure out how this fake king is managing.
If Nine knows one thing is that kings like that will always fall by the brave people who are willing to stand against them.
But that isn't Nine's job. He already made the wrong choice like this before. When he picked the coup over his brother. When he didn't bother to help his brother adjust to all the heavy changes.
Nine had needed time. Time to even believe there were other options. To see that these options weren't wrong and could work for him. His friends had helped him see this. Yet Nine hadn't permitted Ten these insights and moments.
This time though! This time he will make this work! Even if Nine knows that Ten will never be able to fully adjust and become like them. He has gone through too much conditioning to ever be his own person again. But Nine can lead him in the right direction at least.
Ranha knows the way and it seems that she has the same plan as Nine had. Which is going straight towards the private wing.
None of them had allowed access to a whole wing of the castle. Apparently that was the royal's private wing. Which who needs a whole wing to themselves?!
Selfish pricks. All of them.
They turn the corner and get out into the hall. Nine ignores the many many tapestries. Ranha is right behind him as they make their way all the way through the next hall with large windows. They finally reach the right hallway and slow their running. They walk side by side with confidence as the near the entrance. There are two guards there but that doesn't matter. Nine is a visiting guard from a country their stupid king wants a treaty with. It will be easy to gain access.
Nine is a step away from entering the royal wing. He can't help but look at the arch leading into the next wing. The arch is large and high and seems to almost be like tree roots or branches. With small leaves and everything. It looks so livelike and Nine wonders who carved it, it straight up looks like living tree branches. Many other decorations and details just like this one are all across and around this castle.
He can't wonder much longer as the two guards cross their spears in front of Ranha and him.
Ranha glares "What are you doing? Let us through!"
A cat like monster, orange of colour, sounds very unamused "No one is allowed access into the king's wing." She looks unbothered.
The dog monster next to her grins "What Harper said. Shoo little kiddos." the grin makes the slight greying around his snout stand out. He has short trimmed fur and most obviously, the cut tail.
Nine huffs as he stands taller, easily towering over the black and white dog "I was allowed access."
The dog hums and taps his chin before shaking his head "Nope! Doesn't work like that!"
Harper nods "Indeed. Only the royal family and those allowed acces by either them of the Head of House are allowed entrance."
Nine wants to roll his eyes at the stupid head of house title. Everyone should know that is just some stupid coverup. Nine has his theories but for now he sees his in. He gives a charming smile as he nods "I know of course. But he told me himself he needed me to grab something for him." he grins as he wiggles his eye brows. Hinting at a secret meaning.
The dog and cat share a look before Harper looks unimpressed "We do not allow entrance to anyone unless he told us himself he allows entrance."
Ranha luckily sees what Nine is trying and joins in "We seriously got the go ahead! It is an emergancy that we are allowed in."
The dog shakes his head again "No can't do! The last time I didn't follow the orders they cut off my tail! And I only have one of those and I don't want to imagine what will go next."
Nine feels sick to deep in his soul. They... They did what?!
Harper glances at her partner unamused "Shut it Shep."
Shep grins at her "What do you think Harp! What will be next?"
Harper looks umimpressed "If I am lucky it will be your tongue."
Nine feels sick. What is wrong with these people? Why are they still here? What kind of hell and torture kingdom did his stupid younger brother get himself stuck in? Well not for long! Nine will make sure to tell the others everything.
But only after he managed to get Ten home. To get Ten away from this place before they realised that Nine was going to bring this whole kingdom down. He won't make the same mistake of ignoring his brother just because it would be harder for him. No. He will first free his brother and then they will bring this hellhole down and people will be celebrating them.
Harper looks unamused at them "You are not welcome here. Please remove yourself from this area or we will be forced to remove you ourselves." She sounds bored as she says this.
Nine is very sure he can take them but Ranha huffs and walks away. Nine looks back betrayed before following her.
They walk through the halls until they end up in the tapastry hall again. Nine glares at Ranha "Why would you-"
Ranha stops as she shakes her head "You don't understand. You know how I sometimes have these feelings? Of incoming attacks?" Nine nods. It was one of Ranha's many talents and how Ranha was undefeated.
Ranha continues to speak "When you got ready to get us inside. I felt it. This large... presence. Suddenly and ready." she shakes her head "Danger. I felt it was better to retreat and make a better plan."
Nine frowns but sighs "Fair enough. The chance that Ten would be there is rather small..." He may be one of his knights but Nine doubts they truly get anything aside from a title and more dangerous jobs. Well and the masks, those are rather cool. Nine would like a mask. He thinks he would look amazing and very cool in one.
Ranha nods as she mutters "Where could he be... or who would know?" She rubs her chin "The knights probably. But i doubt they will want to help us. I have no doubt that whatever the king used to keep Ten listening to him also works on the other knights. Do you think it is somekind of mind control? or like blackmail? mind control would be okay to break but blackmail is much more sensitive, especially as it implies he got it somehow. We could also wait until the treaty is signed and go by Sanctuary and see if we can get more support through them. Make an allyship with them and then overthrow this whole country."
Nine should be listening. But all he can do is stare at the tapastries.
They happened to end before a set that Nine had been ignoring. Almost like the world itself is trying to force Nine to see and consider them. The first in the set that calls his attention is one showing two small skeletons. One in yellow and one in purple. A sun shown above the one in yellow and a moon shown above the one in purple.
It isn't hard to connect the purple skeleton with the brat king. But Nine doens't understand. Because the yellow one is clearly the crown prince. But they look the same age here. Same height and everything. It had already been confusing that the younger brother had gotten the crown before the older one but this made it seem as if they are much closer in age than the real them shows. It confuses him. It could be something to play up the dramatics but when they had their tour it was implied that these tapastries are a way to document the past.
Though the actual historic events could have gone down differently and this is just another piece of propaganda.
The next one shows a picture of a dark and seemingly partly liquid monster. A skeleton still but large and dark and with tentacles on his back. He stands tall with an arm pointed outwards, the young yellow skeleton is being send away. As the tall one remains with a crown on his dark skull.
Nine looks at the third that caught his attention. This one shows the dark skeleton standing behind the young king. The dark goop skeleton however doens't look menacing. Instead the sockets are closed as the large imposing figure stands with open hands towards the young skeleton in purple. The young skeleton has his sockets open and seems to stare outwards. The tentacles all hang around him as well, not ready to strike but in a way that seemed to surrender. a crown held within the young skeleton's hands.
Nine ponders. He wonders if the gooped skeleton had been Nightmare's parent. He knows that Nim was suposed to be the king before Nightmare and that the gooped skeleton took over. Something about taking the crown from the rightful heir. Nine knows that the gooped skeleton had been named Nightmare as well and Nine is very sure that this one just named the now ruling Nightmae after himself, like a Nightmare the second. This also ties in with the whole head of house theory he has. Nine knows that the head of house is a useless title often given to a favourite servant. Somekind of excuse to keep someone close without needing to put actual time and effort into them standing out as consort or advisor. And the tiny skeleton had to have come from somewhere.
Of course his theory still has holes in it. Mostly what the deal with Dream is and where he fit in. But Nine hopes to eventually figure it out. He already figured out a lot of the situation after all.
He looks at the last one and huffs. It shows the young skeleton in purple holding hands wiht an older looking skeleton in yellow. The moon and sun having been united into one symbol. On the moon side were figures which resembled the different knights. Nine can't help but stare at the one with the snow leopard mask. His brother... stuck in some legacy and played like a pawn... If Nine had tried harder to make Ten feel included would Ten have been okay? Not perfect but maybe a bit better?
On the skeleton in yellow's side was some warrior in blue with a large hammer and a skeleton with many colours and brown clothes with a tail.
Nine stares at the title 'Reunited.' Seems like all these pictures have names. Nine doesn't understand but figures it is some sort of propaganda. Something to mellow out people and make it seem like it is okay.
"Nine?"
Ranha looks worried before she looks at where Nine is staring and her smile turns gentle "Hey... I know you want to help him. And even if we can never truly make him fully whole. We can at least give him a safe place."
Nine sighs and nods "It is something." The damage that his father and old king did was too large. There is no way his simple and naive brother will be able to fully get over it. To be able to move past it. But Nine will do his duty as brother and keep Ten somewhere safe. Some simple jobs will be good. Some normal routine.
Ranha looks around and sees some maids walk by and Nine follows her as she rushes over. She smiles brightly at them before making some small talk. The maids seem happy and content. Easily talking back and giggling once or twice. Though Nine can't help but feel like this is not the way girls normlaly giggle when Ranha flirts with them. This seems more... amused? It is hard to explain. He notices a black cat on the window sill. Lounging as it stares at them with large yellow eyes.
Ranha is casual as can be once she asks the question "I was wondering if we could see a knight! You know. Maybe the one with the white panther mask?"
The maids share a look before one snorts "You mean Cross?" Nine just barely manages to keep his annoyance is. His brother's name is not fucking cross. It is Ten! That is his name and Ten will always be Ten! The maid hums and looks at her friend "Is it training time?"
The other shakes her head "I don't think so. I believe I saw sir Cross with sir Dust."
The first one laughs and nods "Oh that is easy then." she smiles brightly at them "They will be at the ranch. That is where Sir Dust always is."
Nine blinks confused. The ranch? Why? Ranha however asks where they can find it and the maids tell them how to get there. They do warn them to not bother this Dust knight when he is working with the horses before walking off together. Giggling and whispering stuff. They shoot them a look before rushing off giggling again.
Ranha grins and flexes her arms "Still got it." Nine isn't sure she does but he won't challange her on it. They follow the hallways and Nine can't help but stare at the walls around them.
The walls look strange. They have ridges and dips and when Nine feels them they feel like they are made of wood yet he knows for a fact that they are suposed to be rocks and bricks.
Nine once again wonders which masterful crafter and builder made this castle. It almost seems alive. It is warm and beautiful. Everywhere there is signatures of nature or references to it.
The castle he is used to. That of his father. It was all sharp lines and precision. Nothing was allowed to be out of place. No dust or dirt anywhere. Everything had to be perfect.
This castle was wilder. That is the best way Nine can explain it. It is wild and uncontained. It branches outwards. Stuff is uneven and different. The pillars aren't exactly the same even as they are all that same carved stone to look like roots. It feels alive. It feels living. It seems the breath. It feels like there is something larger at play.
Yet it doesnt feel welcome, he doens't feel welcome. Nine can't explain it exactly.
They get outside and follow the path. It takes them a while as they walk past some trees and through a small forest and then they see it.
It is a large ranch. Build with this deep greenish wood of all colours. WIth multiple large pens nearby. It is open and large. But the trees give it privacy. It is beautiful.
Nine feels Ranha tug on his armour and follows where she is pointing. In a pen he can see his brother! Ten is there but... he is seated on a beige horse. Large and strong looking. Antoher skeleton is nearby and seems to be messing with the reins of the horse.
Nine begins to walk closer but he starts to slow his steps. Because... Ten isn't wearing armour. Nine can't rememebr the last time Ten hadn't been wearing armour. Back at home he always had to be ready. Ten.... Ten didn't have time to relax in a casual outfit. Or do things for himself. And yet... here he is... under another tyrant yet... he is wearing casual clothes? He is sitting on a horse? is this somekind of trick of that king? Let Ten relax to make him more loyal? Maybe the brat is smarter than Nine thought.
Ranha shoots him a confused look before going to step closer to the pen but Nine stops her. He can't explain. it is just... Ten looks... He looks different. Not just his clothes but... something else. Nine can't quite explain what it is or put his finger on it. He needs more information. He needs to be prepared to break through any trick or lie. He nods towards the side where a large fench is located and some barrels. Ranha nods and sneaks there with Nine right by her side. They hide behind the barrels and Nine focusses his magic. He quickly enhances his sight and hearing and focusses in. Strangely enough he also feels like there is rian in the air but a glance up shows a cloudless sky. But any thought about the weird feeling in the air is forgotten as soon as Ten speaks.
"Are you sure about this Dust? I still don't think I am ready. What if he throws me off?!"
The other skeleton, Dust is just wearing a large sweater. It looks to be made of high quality. He also seems to be wearing just a beanie to cover his skull. A large red scarf wrapped around his neck. The scarf looks a different quality than everything else.
The other tilts his skull at Ten. Seemingly considering his answer "If you fall off. We can try again."
Ten glares "Dust this isn't funny."
Dust seems to disagree as he grins slightly, just a slight upturn of the teeth "It is fine Cross. Just a matter of trying again. And you and Limestone need to practise this."
Nine feels himself get angry as they use the fake name for his brother but he needs to remain calm. He needs to watch and learn.
Ten grumbles unhappily as he glares down at the horse "I just... I don't get why you can't just train him... You trained Basalt... and Granite for that matter!"
Dust tilts his skull "I did. But he needs to get used to you while running. Get used to how you move and your weight." he pets the horse, the horse leans into Dust's touch "There needs to be trust Cross. You need to trust Limestone that he won't throw you off. And Limestone needs to be able to trust you that you will lead him into the right direction."
Ten blinks and seems to stare at Dust for a moment before looking down at the horse. The animal just stares at him. "I... euh... oh..."
Dust tilts his skull the other way "Do you want to try galloping first?"
Ten looks up and Nine finally figured out what is different. Why Ten looks different. Ten is... smiling. He is smiling brightly and nods excited at the idea.
Nine... Nine can't remember the last time he saw Ten happy and smiling... It is a face he never saw on his brother.
Ranha mutters softly "Wow... I never... He looks so differnet now... so much... more like... A person? i guess? It is weird. I am used to him just. Standing straight and like saluting and being still and unmoving? Like some statue and not like a person?"
Nine nods because he notices it now. The way the Ten is messing with the reins. The way his leg seems to tap the stirrup. The way he seems to almost... wiggle in place a little.
Dust chuckles and nods as he pets the horse a few more times "Go for it. Limestone wants to move." and he takes a few steps back.
Ten gets a large smile on his face as he kicks his heels lightly back, Nine is very surprised when the horse starts moving. He thought you had to be rougher and kick harder to get horses to move. That was hardly a tick.
Yet it works. As Ten starts to ride the horse and the horse speeds up quickly. Very quickly. Ranha suddenly gasps "Holy shit. That horse still has like the three toe system."
Nine blinks in shock. He knows that the wild horses form Orchard were rumoured to be faster and much more diverse than the horses in other places. The wild horses continued to adapt and where made to travel long distances for faster speeds unlike the normal horse endurance. The toes give extra stability and would make the horses able to travel all kinds of terrain while still being fast.
Nine stares in awe as the horse speeds up and than continues to go full speed ahead. Ten tugs lightly on the reins and the horse reacts instantly. Making sharp turns and Nine notices that the back looks longer and sligthly bigger than the horses Nine is used to.
These. These truly are a different breed.
Maybe Nine can convince his king and friend to keep this allyship going for a bit longer. Or maybe get a few horses out of the deal. Nine has no doubt these horses could be much better with good riders.
Ten is.... surprisingly okay with riding the horse. Makes okay turns but well. It is just Ten so NIne is sure he is doing stuff wrong that they can work on back in Ritten, once they find his shortcomings.
Ten eventually returns to Dust and Ten smiles brightly and Nine can't help but stare. He looks happy. He is happy. That is what is different about him. He is relaxed and happy and he doesn't stand as a statue anymore.
Ten laughs as he grins at Dust "Limestone is even faster than before!"
Dust nods but has a tiny smile on his face. Looking very content and proud "Limestone is a strong horse. He is fast and loves to exercise and run. It is honestly a bigger problem to make sure he rests than anything." he crosses his arms and raises a brow at Ten "Remind you of someone."
Ten blushes and looks to the side as he rubs his neck "I have been getting better with the whole work life balance."
Dust nods and agress easily. He pets the horse and looks at Ten "Want to try going faster?"
Faster?! How do you go faster than that!?
Ten looks deeply unhappy and unsure "I don't know..." he pets the horse.
Dust seems to stare at him before speaking "Would it be better if I lead the path with Opal?"
Ten looks up and a look of pure relieve on his face. Had... had Ten always been this expressive?
Ten nods "Please."
Dust nods and looks to the side. He clicks his tongue and teeth and one of the horses looks up. A smaller but beautiful grey horse with striking purple eyes. The horse starts running and jumps over the fench before trotting over to the two skeletons and horse.
Ten laughs and grins at Dust "Opal is showing off again."
Dust sighs and nods "I can't manage to unlearn her to jump fenches." the horse stops before him and pushes her whole head into his chest and arms. Dust pets the head and neck "You ready to lead Cross and Limestone?" The horse pulls back and tussles her head around before waiting patiently.
Dust puts his hand into his hip bag and pulls out this curious stone and metal item. He taps the side and bright gemstones light up and runes start to shine.
Ten looks alarmed "What is that!?"
Dust glances at him and a small smile appears "It is a prototype. Geno gave it to me to test it as I ride horses. It is suposed to be something to make it easy and quick to saddle up horses."
Ten looks deeply unhappy as he glares at the item as if it personally offended him "That stupid smug bastard. He is just trying to buy you over with stupid gifts."
Dust looks deeply amused "It is a prototype."
Ten throws up his arms "You are the only person who would find a good use for this!"
Dust chuckels as he lets the item get near the horse and it shines before it starts unfolding and a few clicks later and the horse is equipped with the normal rider things. Dust gets on top of the horse with a grace and confidence that leaves Nine open mouthed. He never... Even the people at home...
Dust looks at Ten "Ready?"
Ten grins as he nods "Yes. Lock the reins and just hold on right?" as he says it he messes with the headpiece on the horse and Nine wants to roll his eyes.
Dust nods and speaks "Indeed. Just make sure it is ready as if you are going to make a get away." and he waits.
Shit he really is patient... Is that why he is teaching Ten?
Ten nods and sits up straight "Ready!"
Dust chuckles as he turns his horse. He checks back over his shoulder to Ten "Go for it. Get him to follow Opal." Dust doesn't even tug on the reins and Nine can't even spot an obvious movement to direct the horse to start moving. How did he do that?
Ten takes a deep breath before he leans closer to the horse and grabs hold on some extra handbars on the headpiece of the horse. The horse immediantly looks around as Ten nudges the horse to look at Dust and the leaving horse.
The horse stares before it starts to trod after the other skeleton and horse. Ten meanwhile stays as he is. Relaxing against the horse as his horse just follows Dust and his own horse.
It is fascinating. Especially when Dust starts to speed up with some unseeable comment and Ten's horse follows right along. There is no doubt. There is full commitment of both horses.
While Nine had no doubt that Ten still has much to improve with horse riding. Dust seems to be a master. He directs the horse with minimal movement and the horse seems to react immediantly to any unheard and unseen comment.
Soon both horses are running through the pen but it still isn't the gallop speed of before. Dust speaks up casually "We are going to practise you trusting Limestone. Just get into the position to blind ride. We are going to have Limestone follow Opal's lead."
Ten nods "Okay. Okay. I can... I can do that." He lays fully against the horse and pulls his feet out of the saddle footholds. He messes with the saddle and the footholds get a lot higher and further towards the back. Cross does some weird combination of laying and crouching on the horse as he tugs his feet back into the holsters.
Dust looks back over his shoulder. Not at all seeming concerned about having to look where he is going as he blindly tugs at the right moment to make his horse make a turn "Not quite there but this is fine to practise with for now." he pets the horse's neck before leaning closer to the horse and the horse shoots of.
It goes faster than any horse Nine has ever seen before. It is fast and nimble as Dust truly rides the horse. The other horse with Ten blindly following-
Blind Riding. They don't mean it with looking. They mean it as they don't control the horses beyond the minimum. They are minimising the pressure and bother they could give the horses which enables those to run faster than before.
And if this is just the start... How fast can they go?
Ranha watches with her own mouth open before she mutters "This... this must be why he is a Knight. Not fighting or anything like that. He has a way with the horses."
Nine agrees and thinks she is right. The guy on the horse is fragile and delicate looking. Nine has no doubt that he towers over the other. Soft spoken too... But if he is this good with the horses. If he is able to train the wild horses and make them do this kind of stuff? no wonder they immediantly snatched him up and gave him the higest position they could. Make him stay.
The two horses are almost flying around the running pen. Then Dust leads his horse towards the middle where a small pond is located. Then Dust nudges the horse and it just jumps over the pond! It lands easily and keeps running. The horse with Ten doesn't pause a single step and copies the first horse. It lands safely and without a single issue.
Dust holds up an arm and fist and the horse with Ten starts to slow down and continues walking another round before stopping. Dust lets his horse walk by before just jumping off before nudging his horse. It huffs before continuing its trot across the ring.
Ten pants as he grins widely at Dsut "That was awesome!"
Dust chuckles "It is rather fun to just let the horses do their thing isn't it? and you made the jump first try. Killer fell at least twice."
Ten blinks as he looks up shocked "Twice?"
Dust nods "At least. I am pretty sure he snuck off to practise with Granite while I had my private training." he is by Ten's side as he checks the horse "How are you feeling? You were rather tense."
Ten laughs as he rubs his neck "I am fine... thanks for checking... It is just. I think I am done for today. Thanks again for... being here i guess."
Dust pauses his movements as he starts to undo the horse harnass "It is no problem. I am always here." and he clips it fully off.
Nine has made the decision that he likes this knight. The one he met first, the one wiht goop? The one that claimed Ten as his brother? Nine doens't like him. Weirdo with always having tear trails on his face. Not to forget how cocky and confident he acts. Must be some kind of trick and lie that he keeps up to fool and intimidate others. But Nine isn't fooled. He can see through that easily.
He also doesn't like the bigger guy. Dude moves too quietly for someone his size and that hole in his skull? You don't just get that on accident. Something sinister is in that one's past no doubt.
This one? Just a guy trying to train horses and help Ten with his horse and training? Nine can appreciate that. And sure! The fact he looks cute and pretty helps a lot too. Nine would in theory be fine with this guy joining them in Ritten as well. It would be nice for Ten to have someone who is already his friend. Help him feel at home even more. And then Nine can work on impressing the other by showing his skills! It would be quick and easy!
Ten is by Dust's side as they mess with the saddle and headpiece. They talk about settings and prefered length. Nine is honestly not sure what any of it means so Ten probably doesn't either.
Ten looks at Dust and looks down a bit embarrassed "I... I know I am asking a lot... But i don't really feel like going inside already... Mind showing some tricks? again?" and he looks hopeful.
Dust looks at him and nods "I don't mind."
Fuck he is so patient with Ten... Maybe this guy was a good influence on Ten. Helped him with his lessons and training. someone had to be as Nine doubts the king or those other two knights were.
Ten looks downright excited as he waits by the fench as Dust leads the horse towards the other pen where the beige horse joins the other horses. Nine can count at least ten in there, a whole herd of horses all slightly different shaped and colours. All looking healthy and strong and interacting.
Dust returns and gets on top of his grey horse with practised ease. Ten leans against the fench as he watches.
Dust turns his horse around and starts galloping through the area. Even faster than when he had been leading Ten on the other horse. Ten cheers as he grins widely. It looks so... unlike the brother Nine is used to... So very different.
Dust meanwhile makes the horse take a large turn and Ten grins as he looks around before grabbing a cap and throwing it into the pen. Dust aims the horse and straight up leans sideways and off the back of the horse. Almost fully upsidedown to easily snatch the cap of the ground before pulling himself back on the horse's back. Not once slowing down.
Ranha gasps "Hole shit that is so difficult... How?! Without slowing down!?" She is sitting up straighter to enable her to see everything easier. Pure awe on her face and Nine feels like he may have been not fully aware of how difficult that seemingly easy trick is...
Dust runs with the horse by Ten and straight up puts the cap on his skull. Again without once slowing down. Ten laughs and cheers "Go Dust go!" as he grins.
Dust keeps moving the horse around quickly and now he has started to zigzag with it! Nine blinks and looks at Ranha "Isn't that like... suposedly very hard for horses?"
Ranha nods as she doesn't look away from the display "It is insane! Horsese make large turns because of their back. I don't know how that horse is that flexible or how that guy can just direct the horse to make the turns by not actively turning but instead almost twisting in a jump?!" she stares "Is this what the rare horses can do? That inhabit this land? We need to get Regius to get some horses!"
Nine glares at his best friend "Don't speak the king's name so casually."
Ranha waves him off "It is fine. We were all friends before he became king so we are good."
Nine huffs as he focusses on the display of masterful horse riding. It is just that not speaking the title is disrespectful and he will not make them seem unprofessional or like they don't take their ruling class seriously. Regius only became king after the fall of the old one and Nine doesn't want people to think he is an easy target just because of that. And he doubts a brat like this country's king can see how much work they had to put into bettering what they had and helping their land and people heal from all the damage.
Ranha makes a curious noise close to choking and Nine pays attention just to see Dust standing on the back of the horse. Perfectly balanced and even balancing on one leg as the horse keeps running around the pen. He steps off the horse on a fench where he runs alongside the horse, the horse finally slowing a bit down, before Dust steps back on the back and the horse speeds up again.
Dust crouches down as he puts his hands on the horse's back before just making a handstand!
Nine can't imagine how hard standing on a horse could be. much less making a handstand?! He knows how to make a handstand of course and it is easier to do it with momentum. Dust did it without that.
Ten keeps cheering for his friend as Nine stares in awe. Ranha is muttering about how insane this is and how there has to be magic at play. Yet aside from the presure of the rain he has felt since the start he hasn't noticed any spells of any type. Not even to help lead or control the horses like other riders do. Nine can't help but just keep staring.
Dust sits back on the horse but backwards as he calmly undoes the saddle. The saddle falls off the horse and as soon as the saddle hits the ground it seems to disappear. Right, the saddle was part of that magic item Dust is testing. All while Dust remains seated on the powerful beast that is still running. Dust turns back around and messes with the reins that seem to make handholds on the headpiece.
Dust next grabs hold of the handholds and lays his legs on the back of the horse. He taps the side of the neck of the horse nad motions forwards before he lays fully against the horse.
The horse going fast before is nothing compared to how fast it runs now. It is bolting through the pen and there seems to be zero control that Dust has over it. Instead Dust just holds on and lets it do its things.
"He minimised his contact and hold on the horse. he freed the horse from the saddle to enable it to move even more freely and go faster!" Ranha looks downright excited as she just stands there and stares. Nine glares at her and pulls her back down to hide wiht him.
"Stop standing! They may see you!" Nine feels an anxiety at being caught snooping now. Not like before where he would just lie and say he wasn't snooping or spying. Now he is nervous about how it would reflect on him as a person, especially to the smaller and skilled skeleton. Fuck he wishes he was wearing his better armour than this one. He hadn't wanted to seem like he was trying to impress Orchard's ruler or make it seem like they thought they needed to impress this leader but he is regretting it now. How can he show him his best side when he isn't prepared!?
The horse continues to run before coming to a slow stop near Ten. Ten is grinning widely as he claps his hands "That was so cool! Dust it is nuts how fast you can go with Opal!"
Dust shrugs as he gets off and grabs a brush to start taking care of the animal while Ten stands near his side. "I was wondering soemthing." Dust voice is soft and calm. Even.
Ten nods as he watches Dust work "Ask away."
Dsut shoots him a look before speaking again "I figured you would want to be near Nightmare with the guests here. Why with me?"
Ten goes quiet as he looks down. Nine nudges Ranha and nods. It is their time to act! This is the perfect set up-
A hand grabs him by the neck and pushes him flush against the barrels he had been hiding behind. Ranha makes a shocked sound and Nine can barely see her in the same position as he is in.
A deep voice speaks up "Dont you know that eavesdropping is rude? But what could be expect from snooping immature children."
Nine freezes. That is the voice of the big knight guy. The one wiht the lion mask. Horror. how... when? Nine hadn't even heard him! When did they get exposed and found out!?
Horror continues to speak "But if you wish to listen in. You will listen. You will hear what Cross has to say instead of speaking for him."
Ranha growls "His name isn't-UGH!" she chokes for a moment before the kngiht releases his grip a bit again.
"Listen."
Ten finally answers "It is dumb..."
Dust hums as he leans against the horse "Try me."
Ten isn't looking up as he rubs his own arm "I... I didn't expect them to be happy with me... That is fair. I just. Didn't expect them to hate me without knowing me." Ten frowns as he softly pets the horse "It is like... They are unhappy with who i am now and want me to be who i used to be, who i don't want to be anymore. Yet they hate that person." Ten hunkers in on himself "I don't... like feeling like that."
Dust frowns as he puts a hand on Ten's shoulder "That is on them."
Ten frowns as he looks away "It isn't... I" He frowns as he moves his hands around. Had... Had Ten always moved this much? That can't be right. Nine remembers him being still and unmoving. Their father had always been strict about staying in line and acting as they had to and-
and...
and being... the way he wanted... to be...
Like Nine wants Ten to be.
Oh...
Ten isn't the problem... is he?
Dust takes Ten's face between his hands and makes Nine's younger brother look at him "Cross. Look at me. No i mean it. Look at me." Ten stares at him and Dust looks at him "You are you. No one else. No one telling you how you should be or act is right. You are fine like this. You are happy like this. You can be however you want to be, whatever makes you feel good and feel like you are you." Dust gentle bonks their skulls together "I think you would do best if you visit Lust for a bit and you two hang out and focus on something else. Okay?"
Ten frowns but gives a slow nod "Okay."
Dust nods as he keeps holding the taller skeleton "And this is not me sending you away. I enjoy us spending time together. But i think being here while they are here is stressing you out. Making you second guess yourself. Go to a different environment and let yourself relax. When you come home we can try more horse riding or you can help Killer trying to get Kingdom Devourer out of a tree again. Go relax."
Ten frowns before nodding and just hugging the other. Dust chuckles and pats his back "You are fine the way you are Cross... In matter of fact. You are perfect the way you are." Ten's breath seems to hitch as he just holds the other tighter and continues to hold him. It isn't until some time passed that Ten lets go and steps back with an embarrassed expression and... and slightly hazy looking eyes.
"Sorry... I know you don't... don't like... I am sorry."
Dust chuckles and pats his back "It is alright. Go hang out with your boyfriend while I clean up."
Boyfriend... but... why would he... who would even want to date Ten? He doens't even have a personality and is just a tool and an idiot-
Except everything he has seen now shows otherwise and... Why does Nine expect Ten to be the same way that their father wanted them to be?
Ten walks away with a wave and goes straight towards the castle. Looking a bit better as he is smiling and seems to have a small bounce in each step.
Dust watches him go before he just walks straight towards their hiding place oh shit when did-
Dust stops before them and looks unamused. His gaze cold and seemingly able to look straight into his soul. Nine would have been frozen even without the hand holding his neck.
Dust looks at Horror "Good catch H. Trouble?"
Horror hums "They tried to get into our king's wing. I was ready to give backup."
Nine feels himself grow cold. They had been followed? The whole time? They had been watched the whole time and they hadn't even noticed!
Nine... Nine may have been wrong about how capable these guys are...
Dust hums "Lets put them in the jail cell as time out. Children should know not to wander after all."
Nine feels humiliated as he and Ranha are dragged towards the castle. Dust walks behind them as Horror leads the way, Horror does not let them walk.
They walk by some servants and Nine sees it are the same maids that they met in the hallway. The maids giggle and nod respectfully to both Horror and Dust and greet them with "Hello my Knights." before they shoot a glance at Ranha and Nine before gigglign together.
They are dropped off in a cell each and the door is locked. Nine goes to check the lock only to realise there is magic woven into the very bars and walls. These locks aren't just physical but also magical. He can't break them out.
Horror hums "There. Children have their time out." he looks highly amused as he nods to Dust "Mind taking over watch?"
Dsut shrugs as he walks towards the exit "I will take your shift. you make sure the children behave." and he leaves.
horror looks at them amused and Nine feels terrible...
Not just the fact he looked like an idiot to the pretty and skilled skeleton. But he also made a fool out of himself to be caught snooping and trying to get into places he isn't allowed to be.
He sits on the bed and can't help but look at his own hands.
Does... does Ten really not want to come home? How can Nine get him to come along? Will he be forced to drag his brother home.
Nine pauses at the thought and feels a new horrifying feeling overtake himself.
When did he become so much like his father?
#also. Someone: why do you keep Shep on board!! He lies and always lies!#nightmare: ... because he is actually very trustworthy? He may lie but you know he lies? and he does his job well? seems fine to me.#Killer: until he lies to the wrong person again and we get another cross situation.#nightmare: it is fine! I am sure everythign is fine.#Shep knows 100% what he is doing. He is being a menace on purpose and honestly everyone likes it.#Ranha trying to impress the maids. the maids “This wannebe is weird but sure. lets play along. we are bored.”#the maids “Dust is gonna make them regret living if they intrude on horse bonding time and we love the drama so lets send them that way"#because the maids servants and guards aren't stupid. they know what is up.#Also yes. Dust's brother Phantom gave Dust the red scarf. as birthday present as soon as they reunited. It was very sweet.#Nightmare has a purple one. Phantom had grinned and as Nightmare is dust's brother that makes phantom brother-adjacent.#also nine: I vibe checked them all and i figured them all out no issue.#Every assumption he makes is wrong. by a lot.#Okay hahaha but yes! I think this one turned out very nice! Not a whole lot to add as commentary hihihi.#Hope you enjoy Spot!#Oh wait on that note!!!#Dust is training the horses to be faster and run away after the mountain.#He wants the horses to be better prepared for that situation so he is hard at work to enable them to be faster and to run to safety as the#rider just holds on.#Okay now i am done lmao#edit. I fixed Opal's name from Pearl back to Opal. I did my girl so dirty i am sorry Opal (and Dust)#Newageau
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hearing that arcane had more seasons planned but it too got axed by riot is just so .... ugh, not even a show like arcane is safe from season cancelling :/
i was wondering how the hell they are going to managed wrapping everything up in just 3 more episodes and how extremely dense and even rushed some parts felt in the previous ones already so im honestly rather worried about what im gonna see next saturday ..
(just to add this in an edit; i saw conflicting things, i read they wanted to do more seasons but got stopped by riot and then that they didnt plan more actually- in the end its still just extremely condensed and rushed and im sad about it bc theres so much stuff in there you could make entire episodes out of ,,, and it doesnt change how i am worried they will wrap it up nor about them wanting to make more similar stuff)
#ganondoodles talks#personal#arcane#its arcanes biggest problem- being so extremely condensed#also they want to make more stuff about different parts huh#man can we never get just one good piece of media that is allowed all the time and funds it needs to be what it should be#instead of rushing everythign to do more and more and more but denser and shittier and cheaper just bc moneyyy#not saying arcane is cheap- but if they want to do more league shows or whatever .... no way they are gonna keep up the solid writing#and its gonna suffer ... i mean arcane already suffered#its just so sad to think about so many thing and#WHAT COULD HAVE BEEN
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ur timeline post is insane and fantastic do the others have a grasp on or figure out, or even believe, that the prime timeline is just that—the original? or is that just the naming system? how would they react to that sort of explanation? who wants to return to their timeline first/is that the goal overall for any of them? :’0
to preface, i tend to use timeline/universe interchangeably.. ok . long post time. be warned.
1. do the others understand they're in the prime timeline?
as of right now, this system uses "interuniversal" passports planted on everybody by gee-man as they enter the prime timeline. this was to get around the problem of people having the same name. I love freemanverse but i could not understand how they came to the conclusions of accepting our third-party naming conventions. why would freemind call himself freemind when his name is gordon freeman? martini (who can go by his middle name) doesn't get the "feetman" name joke until way later, so calling him that off the bat would be weird (his passport changes from gordon "martini" freeman to gordon "martini" feetman when the feet pic bit occurs). No one's name is ACTUALLY barmey, mindrian, freerun, freemercy, etc... but it is on the passport! and they use these names when referring to each other.
okay, so. the naming thing was the main function of the passport, but it has other standard information on it
Dates of birth - explanatory
date issued - release date of their IN REAL LIFE series (I.e Gordon is Nov 19 1998)
date expired - res cas day according to the prime timeline
(These three dates are often conflicting and confusing, which is as intended. They all exist in different years BUT the events of their universes are taking place at the same time. Timelines are synced up.)
AND THEN! place of origin. Every timeline gets assigned a number based on when they were chronologically conceived (for the most part. it's not a strict rule. it can be bent for convenience or funny/cool purposes).
ips: 000
og gordon: 001
freemind: 002
gorgeous: 003
so on and so forth. i like to pair these letters with numbers (HL-001, M-002 (M, not FM, because it's "Mindverse."*) G-003, etc) seeing as HL-001 is One, they can come to the conclusion themselves that it's the "prime" timeline. whether they ACTUALLY call it that is debatable. i just do it because star trek does, but this requires a more "robust" naming system since it's more than just "prime," "alternative," and "mirror."
*Mindverse technically has alternative timelines too, but we're going with the one where gordon enters the test chamber (not stark) and gordon would've been taken by g-man (not felix)
2. How would they react to that sort of explanation?
Everything is very overwhelming and nonsensical. Since the collisions take place (for the most part) over the course of the rescas, most of them are too stressed to try to fully grasp the situation. They have their interuniversal passports, which just materialized on their person/with their belongings when they get sucked into the prime timeline, so they know SOMETHING IS UP. Some care more than others, like Freemind and Martini (not a game au) both freak out. Freemind probably thinks he's high for a bit even though he doesn't FEEL high. Martini thinks he's going crazy or hit his head, which doesn't help when the science team acts like this is a perfectly normal thing (while it's not a game, they all have their "npc" quirks). The science team is also the narrative vessel which can help explain the phenomenon. emphasis on can. Coomer understands the framework, while Tommy has a more intimate knowledge. But neither explain anything too quickly. Coomer wants playcoins and Tommy would acknowledge the "glitching" and correctly identify it as dangerous and warn the others about it.
The timeline information is accepted. There's not much they can do. They're in an alternate universe? Ok. Well, first things first, don't die from rescas. It's not until later that the information is DIGESTED. This would be during any downtime they have while going through Black Mesa (think how the HLVRAI crew took the occasional nap) and then when they enter the domestic arc. For the most part, everyone thinks that they've somehow JUMPED universes, not that their universe and another have collided together. I guess this could be considered a "plot twist" and if I was writing a comic (comic ver 2.5!) there would be a somber moment where everyone who cares realizes that THIS is there home now. it's familiar and unfamiliar. they know it but they don't. No one is devastated, but it's a very aimless feeling. Characters like Freerun, Gorgeous, Freecat, and Freemercy are "emotionally detached" from their timelines, so their reactions range from not caring to easily adjusting.
3. who wants to go home and is that an overall goal?
I think Martini, Freemind, and Cicero would all want to go home, Martini more urgently since he has Joshie. No one really understands the depth that Cicero wants to go home due to language barrier, but it is assumed. Freemind wants to go home moreso out of paranoia that being in a different universe was harmful to him on a molecular/quantum level (it's not) and that having multiple of him around is WEIRD and he wanted to go back to being the one-and-only while reveling in the fact he was cosmically significant enough to have parallel universes based on him.
Everyone makes the assumption that there is a home to return to. Their first goal is to survive the rescas. Once they get through that, they awkwardly all move in together (where else are they supposed to go?). This living situation is considered temporary... but.. it's not.
(malmo by mook is one of THE freemanverse songs no i do not take criticism)
Their expectations are curbed quickly. At this point one of the gmen (likely mr.coolatta or gee-man) or tommy would just come out and say yeah there is no other (relevant) universe. it's just this one now. (the merging process is... difficult to explain so I'm not going to try right now. maybe later..). Cicero wanted to go home because people understood them there and thats where all his friends were. but Molly and others (sugar man , corp) are here now, and his new friends are making the effort to break the language gap. Martini wanted his son and he got his son. Freemind has an actual group of people who care about and support him, something he's not used to having (and barmey is there too. giggles. grins.). No one is particularly upset at learning the prime timeline was now also THEIR timeline since their . liek. hierarchy of needs gets filled. it's like if your house burned down but it didnt ACTUALLY burn down, it just FEELS like it did, and then there was an exact copy in its place with miniscule (but noticeable) differences. like something changed and there's a feeling of loss but you actually haven't lost anything. it's sobering and might be upsetting for a little bit, but it's also familiar and comforting. its ok. they all have gained something now. f... family. found family . grins. smiles even.
#we can figure out how to fit any of the new HLVRAI2 characters into the timeline when we get there.#im a freemanverse and buttermind fan. making shit up is my specialty#i tried to make the mechanics of how everythign works open ended enough so that new gordon/other characters can join with little alteration#of established “”“canon”“”#...canon used lightly#half life#freeman's mind#mindverse#freemanverse#gordonverse#hlvrai#asks
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Outlining the first season of RTTE, and remembering a random plot hole that I’m also fixing in this fic; how the heck everyone everywhere in the world just randomly knows the names to all the dragons that the riders name (deathsong, catastrophic Quaken, night terrors, etc.)
#like. how#how do they just randomly know and use the names for all the dragons that the riders discover#how are these random names universal??#im fixing it#random thought but STILL#EVEN THE DRAGON EYE#how does Viggo just start using the name that Hiccup came up with?#im trying to have as little plot-holes as i can in this story#sure some creative liberty is being taken. but im trying to make sure everythign connects and is smooth and makes sense timeline wise#httyd/the deep crossover
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I dont know if this will interest anyone else but. A map of the JAKDF base locations.
(and also possible bases? Those are mostly me throwing around cities though.)
map that shows up in the manga and the locations on it
and the locations on it
#kaiju no. 8#kn8#UH#WHAT DOES THIS COUNT AS#worldbuilding#??? MAYBE??? OR LIKE#map#I GUESS??? ?#i was making up divisons for a OC verse thing im doin with arao and uh. YKNOW. KINDA GOOD TO KNOW WHERE EVERYTHIGN IS ON THE MAP#anyways#have fun#enn queue (for once)
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.
#vent post#cw dysphoria#cw ed#today had such good potential to be a relatively relaxing and decent day where i could rest and recover a bit#aaaaand then heRE COMES DYSPHORIA WITH A STEEL CHAIR!!!#sitting here stress-eatinf cookie dough and crying over the fact that my fat stomach and hips will never let me pass#even in the worst depts of my disordered eating and restriction and exercise i still couldnt rid myself of them#i can bind and pack and wear different clothes but i cant change my face and my body shape#well ofc its technically possible but it isnt within the realm of whats realistically possible for me#'youve just gotta make your shoulders wider to even things out' ok how 'just go on T and diet and exercise for 5 years! 😁'#'oh yeah this advice assumes that you have the ability to safely procure a T prescription and can pay for it and the regular appointments#to monitor your hormone levels. and also it requires you to have an able body without chronic pain that prevents you from exercising!'#ok thanks guess ill die then#for legal reasons that was hyperbole#the answer to so many of my problems is just Lose Weight! as if i javent been trying and failing to do so for more than half of my life#'plenty of cis men have wide hips! all you really need to pass is a masc face and well-fitting clothes!'#okay. i have a fat baby face capable of producing approx. 15 chin hairs & when i wear fitted clothes i look like a pixar mom w/ a beer gut#tfw the hormone disorder makes u look like a person with a hormone disorder and not like a conventionally attractive cis person 🫠#man i had such a good long streak of body acceptance and then out of fucking nowhere i hate everythign about it#this is ghe last goddamn thing i need on my plate right now.#now ive wasted the entire afternoon and evening shopping for things to help and i ultimately bought nothing and just upset myself worse#fucked my back and leg up yesterday and so today i struggled to even balance and walk. man i cant Lift Weights i need physical therapy#and now on top of the mental anguish and physical pain and hatred of who i am as a person i Also hate my body again !#genuinely what is the fucking point. im so tired#anyways. itll pass or whatever. time to eat a dinner i dont need and try to fill in a coloring page or some sort of harmless distraction#how the fuck is it already almost 10. maybe ill just go to sleep
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episode five of Hannibal
#i should probably start looking up trigger warning for this stuff.#the parallels are sooo heavy handed in hannibal#i mean mr hannibal basically makes them happen half the time#but seriously even hto i forget half of what i've watched i do remember that a lot of them have had#blanat shared themes between the crime plot and the everythign else plot#hannibal#nbc hannibal#i said this#chem watches hannibal
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post cancelled i want to die
#just jupiter#full on failed my midterm which i didn't think i did too bad on. keep messing up my stupid phys homework. not understanding my astro hw eve#even though it SHOULD be simple. i'm 100% overcomplicating it.#got some other bad news today that like. i don't blame anyone for but it still sucks. and left me feeling really vulnerable and stuff#and my roommate's in a bad mood and i'm always super sensitive to that and its not his fault but like. it makes me anxious bc of my dad#feeling on the verge of a breakdown#i want to just curl up in a ball and give up but i need to like. get over it and put on a brave face and go socialize tonight and pretend#and pretend everythigns FINE when it's NOT and i just wantt o go home or talk to someone about this but i don't feel like i CAN bc#bc my parents and i Don't Talk about this stuff#idk. it's whatever i guess.#vent
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okay in the spirit of the previous post we are going to brute force me into sharing random scenes from fics that are either unfinished or never going to be finished! we are going to do this collaboratively (im fair and benevolent) but i don't want to give any information about said wips (im cruel and dictatorial) so this is going to be a blinded poll <3 vote here <3
#every draft in my wip folder has a song name for a title already thats just how i roll <3#no im not telling fandoms or pairings or anything lol... and let me tell you it is NOT predictable#my choices are making quite honestly no sense at all but you know. sometimes u r struck by a Vision of a scene and never get anywhere with#not including original works on this but like. i think this is most everythign i have#idt noa's even read some of these... really just because she hasn't had the chance to go through my computer in a while#she reads through my notebooks and stuff but once things make it to the computer she cant find it so it escapes her attention...#anyway i promise ill post some of whichever ones win! just to try to mix things up for myself i guess!#prayer circle for this dredging of the lake of my documents folder to snap me out of my writers block <3
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rgg where’s all the kiwami 2 daigo merch…. an acrylic stand is not enough….
rgg doesnt like money cause i wouldve taken out a loan for him
#snap chats#y2 daigo plushie ........ he would be my everythign ...#real delulu land is hoping for an official puffer or necklace#'snap you can just use a regular white puffer' no i want the exact style and black inning it is not possible finding such a thing#it dont even gotta be the same material just give me that rounded collar and black inside and we'll be set#same business with the necklace .... i know yall fuck with jewelry making mk ........#anyway y2 daigo body pillow when. tied up pls
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