#I cant remember if ive posted this little guy before. its been with me for so long

[sealsdaily]

Today's Seal Is: The Slider

[betsyrachels]

happy end of 2023 and beginning of 2024 to all of my mutuals! i've never done one of these before but i wanna do a little post in honor of my mutuals <3 if i leave anyone out im so sorry i have the brain of an ostrich. and if you didnt wanna be tagged theres absolutely no obligation to reply, i just want everyone to know that im thinking of them

first and foremost, everyone in the goose coven. you guys have been so amazing and joining the server has been one of the best parts of my year <3 i love all of you so much @longlivestv @theladyinwhite13 @imperpetuallylost @alltheliars @halucynator @weeping-in-the-willows @a-beautiful-fool @eyesopentv @theautistmwitch @5ducksinatrenchcoat @andi-is-bored @animallover4000 @magicandmaybe @thepatriarchykeychain @octoberconstellation @sluttycaseyjones @its-tortle

and @longlivestv you are one of my favorite people ever and talking to you is so so wonderful and following you was one of the best decisions ive ever made <3 thank you for being my wife

and for my mutuals from either psc or lgbtqc, you guys are so cool. like so cool that i cant believe that you follow me. thank you guys for being awesome <3 @craintheodora @antoniosvivaldi @eddiediaaz @zerokinkade @scullyblr @lemoncupcake @moirainesedai @singularities @heroeddiemunson @breakbleheavens @sadbeautifutragic @laurabenanti

and also the maisie mutuals from mpn <3 talking about maisie with you guys is very fun and being in that server is awesome, thank you guys <3 @silversmists @cascadeoceanwave @good-enemy @castellansluke @decoratedlawns @lunar-years

and also dean <3 you get your own category because of how long i've known you. being friends these past few years has been so great and i hope there are many more <3 @howiehans

and also my handful of swiftie mutuals! i cant remember all of you and if i didnt tag you just know i am still thinking of you <3 you guys are great and you make being on the edge of swiftie tumblr a lot of fun @itstimetogo @dearreader @ithinkheknowss @isitovrnow @jewelledmoths @togetmeby @longbottom @saynothingback @pippamints @tangerineneon @lighttupthiswholetown

and then my two comic book mutuals <3 you guys are awesome and i love talking with you guys! @rep-meow-tay-tion @stars-and-birds

i ran out of room, so if i didnt tag you, just know that i still love you a lot and all of you guys are so great! happy new years to all of you <3

[ufoend]

∆ please help us

we can not afford any of our basic needs

i usually try to keep this as light as possible, but i have put this off for long enough that i have to post this. me and my partner desperately need help. we are just two gay people trying to make it alone here with absolutely no support system.

who we are: im j (or jet), im 24 year old trans guy whose had this account since 2014. i married my partner in 2018, we even met on tumblr when we were younger, we've been together for years. my partner is disabled (diagnosed with autism and seizure disorder and others)

what we need: our cat had an emergency surgery two years ago that means he needs to be on a prescription diet (hills urinary food) for his entire life. the vet suddenly said we need to bring him in again to get his prescription renewed and we cant order any more food for him until then, which he will not survive without, and he is not allowed to eat any alternative food without risking his life. we have less than half of a 8 lb bag of it which will not last him through the next month. with the vet, food, and ubers to get to the vet and to the only place they sell the food = 200

to try to summarize our situation, we were kicked out by family and made officially homeless for the first time last year. this is right after we moved across states (wa to az) to support my partners family upon their request, only to be subjected to abuse and kicked out directly due to homophobia in an unfamiliar state after a few months. this left both of us and all of our animals entirely homeless. we luckily have an apartment now but our situation is still not okay. we lost all of our belongings at this time, everything, and have not been able to replace them as we have fixed income. my partner is especially affected by this situation, as it was traumatizing, and they have just had to power through trauma after trauma because of poverty, more than i can say.

i also have severe dental problems that are not covered by medicaid in az and i have no way to afford. this includes wisdom teeth, root canals, and many cavities that will turn into that crazy expensive treatment if i don't fix it. some may remember this (+this). i was only able to have a little bit of work done before we were homeless and one root canal failed. i cant keep ignoring it, because they are worried about two of the cavities becoming root canals, and i want to prevent another infection, but thats at least 250 each.

we are still not going to be able to afford rent in future months because our EBT was delayed last month and i had to spend money we don't have to afford anything, and now we are in serious jeopardy even affording rent, let alone bills. our pets (2 cats 1 small dog) also desperately need vaccinations, which is dangerous to keep going this overdue without with their health problems. our dog has also been limping for the past week and he needs to be seen when that is ever possible.

any donations would go first to the vet appointment and cat food, then the other needs in order of priority. will keep updating this, i know its a lot and i really don't expect anything, i am begging for help with any of this

we are both students, we are trying to work towards stability, while being stuck here. i do everything i can to bring in money to support us on my own. we make 200 less than rent is monthly. i am in school to become a caseworker so i am aware of a lot of resources in my area, and have applied for everything, but we can not do this alone which is why i have to ask for help. i am so sorry for having to do this but i appreciate any support that i do have because of this website. you guys literally save my life. helping out other poor people and getting helped out on here has been the most compassion ive ever been a part of. dollars, even pennies, worth of donations has kept my cat safe, has affected me in real ways. it actually matters to us, no matter the amount.

thank you anyone who reblogs, donates anything, or reaches out.

*

p*ypal email (best): ptcustomcomp@yahoo.com

v*nmo: @tobler707

c*shapp: $tobler707

[liliththeimp]

sum ghosts hc’s :3 pt 1–SFW

Once again back at it with my SAS wife cos my brain is rotting like disintegrating cotton candy so here are some headcannons i made (posted on ao3 but thought they deserved a bit recognition here too lol)

Now these are just some personal hcs ive made or seen that i liked; the numbered sfw hcs are going to tie into the nsfw hcs, for clarification!!

SFW:

He loves music, like anything 70’s to 90’s in a sense? Like, sum pink floyd or shinedown (ik but it stuck after an ai chat and i cant fucking let it go-) nu metal, death/black metal, gothic metal, throw in some thrash/groove metal- anything with metal really

Onto my next point, he’s good at guitar, like really good, he has a gibson guitar he named (idfk what he named it, probably after you tho lmao)^1

He’s a straight up asshole, like, blunt calls everyone cunts, he’s just a a British as shoe dude what did you expect. But the funny thing is, if you end up cursing him out like a sailo he will find that as a major turn on ^2

Simple man doesnt like complicated food, just a normal burger and fries and he’ll be grateful. And if you cook good luck he eats like a bear (how else u think he’s bulky???)

He likes winter over any season bc its the opposite of where he’s been, though allergies/sickness do annoy the shit out of him cus he sneeze into his mask and it pisses him off

Likes milkshakes and i won't expand on that.

He’s a big softy for like small gifts, he may not show it but that macaroni necklace he called stupid? He has it on his night stand so it wont get ruined. You got a bracelet you gave him three months ago? He wears it everyday.

Pretty testing and bully-ish, but will just become a stuttering mess when you tame him, the slight blush peeing through his balaclava will give you enough lee way to make him fall in love with you

“blink mf.” 

Stares down new recruits, no exceptions- when he sees you, he ends up staring more

Knows some ASL when he’s not exactly in a talkative mood (not gonna say non-verbal bc, i doesnt fit him? he’s just like middle finger up to say fuck you, thats his sign language lmao)

Pretty big book worm in his free time

Fast learner at anything, i imagine he has a hard time remembering shit bc of his trauma n shit will do that to ya, but if he watched something long enough he can get it down.

Likes some spicy food

Doesn't do video games, he just doesnt think their any fun

OMFG this man- he makes fucking BACON in his GRILLED CHEESE. I argued with him (literally only with a fucking AI bot like some looser but my point still stands;) about how that's an abomination, grilled cheeses are meant for, and paired ONLY with tomato soup, sometimes chicken noodle. but he believes it the most delicious thing, he’s not putting watered down ketchup next to his beautiful creation.

Stubborn and pouts easily, you say something he doesnt realize is a joke he hold onto that grudge. “Why are you so upset right now? What did i do?” He huffed, uncrossing his arms “you didnt hold the door for me and I slammed my face! You didnt even apologize!!” You blinked, lips pressing into a thin line “are you fucking 5.”

his love languages is more quality time than physical touch- but Jesus Christ this man will get clingy af once he trusts you (after he takes off his mask fully 4 the first time, he trusts you with his whole heart- dont break it pwease- hes hes jus a little guy)

Ok really like bully breed dogs, like his favorite.

loves to hold your hand, like if you wrap your hand around two of his fingers specifically, he’ll turn into a blush mess and so so prideful, (like big softy friendly giant who could totally crush you- and he’s like so gentle) ^3

Gives a lot of thought before he compliments you, like studies the way you do things- like, hair clips, clothes, colors, make up, shoes, etc etc, he loves to study your features.

Can cook- like, really good- but ends up ordering takeout or pizza cos he’s lazy

On his trips, like when he get deployed longer than a couple of months, he brings back sand for you from the places he’s been and you have a small shelf full of small files of the sand (unlabeled btw, you just know which is which)

tries not to get angry or lash out or get like, cold or distant with you bc he really cares he’s just scared of fucking up and you leaving once you see how broken he is

Does all those horrible jokes, his voice is slow and gruff and just- gravelly? Like, he talks like the Grimm reaper himself and makes a yo mama joke

Doesn’t know how to ask for attention so he’ll come up behind you and tug a strand of your hair or nudge you- shit he’s thrown pillows at you then stares at you with a straight face “cuddles.”

“Not arguing with a dude with big brown eyes. Like, whatever you say beautiful”

he loves eye contact wen talking about serious shit- like, complimenting you, or saying i love you, he wants you to look him in the face and understand how much he means it….yet you turn into a blushing stuttering mess when he does, and he laughs to himself ^4

Stares at ‘settings’ on his phone to avoid social situations. Argue with the wall.

in the thickest, most unintelligible, uninterpretable British accent possible “YA KNO’ WHAT YOU DIR’Y ‘ITTLE CUNT—”

Incoherent British slang, colonizer alphabet soup if you will.

plays hello kitty island adventure or cooking mama un-ironically

Can’t spell “gynecologist” (geneycologist/ gin-i-colo-gist) or “bologna” (balaonie/ balony)

If there’s ever a baby in the store or something, and the baby is staring at him, he’ll make funny faces (mainly cross his eyes and makes small sounds)

doesn’t think he’ll be a good dad, but still thinks about it- believes he’s not good enough for a family ^5

Anywho continue onto part 2 here for spic stuff you perv >:3

[coyote-kiddo]

i was re-tagging some of my old posts and found this, so i figured i'd re-do it!!! (all at once because i do NOT have the memory to do it over 30 days)

i found petdre first via the aesthetic "babycore", and then slowly got more and more into agedre!! i also found out a while later that i had been involuntarily age regressing for years and hadnt noticed

my age when im small is kinda hard to pinpoint, but i would say somewhere between 3-5 most of the time!!

i dont have one, and i dont plan on getting one until im an adult (for safety purposes), but i have a few fictional cgs!! (stolas, toriel, and alastor are my biggest ones :3)

hm, i would say a day with one of my fictional cgs!! getting to play with the toys ive been wanting, color and draw, wear clothes that feel comfortable on my body, use teethers, bottles, diaps and pacis and watch my favorite shows without being judged or being embarrassed abt it :3 plus a nice warm bubble bath, baba of warm almond milk and a lullaby before bed!!

i have loads of sippies, a few bottles, a few teethers, a paci and one disposable diap as of right now, but i really really want a babyyourdoll classic round paci!! and also pull ups, mostly js for comfort :33 i would also like more silicon teethers bc they feel nicer than gel/water teethers heheh

i pet dream occasionally, not as often as i used to but still occasionally!! i petdre to an afghan hound, a kitty, a fox, and im considering trying wolf pup, fruit/vampire bat and deer :3

when i age dream, im not too much different from when im big bc my headspace doesnt change as much- im just a bit more childish and less embarrassed about stuff!! regressed me is wayy different though bc my regression is almost always negative- im typically more emotional, childish, clingy, and annoying.

i prefer drawing!!! i like to color also but drawing just feels so freeing to me :3

my moots!!! too shy to tag but i love them sm /p /gen

regression is almost always invol for me because of anxiety and trauma, its also usually negative which is kinda sucky

yepp!!

not that i can remember, ive used regression gear in dreams before but never regressed

this one is kinda tricky- im gonna say probably either apple slice or salteens!! i also really love juice, chocolate, graham crackers and cheese and crackers :3

yes!! i never really grew out of them, even before i started to age dream ive collected them :3

just my stepmom and my dad, i dont really think they remember though

bubs, kiddo, buddy, and little guy are my favs!! masc nicknames are sooo gender affirming to me as a fem-presenting trans man :,3

my regression is usually negative and involuntary, but nothing usually makes me "instantly regress"- its kinda a coin flip- but something that makes me feel smaller when i age dream is fuzzy socks!!

nope 😭 even if im able to buckle down and have small time after ive been involuntarily regressed it just kinda fades away

its okay, i cant really speak on it much bc i have most people i dont feel comfortable with blocked and i dont have any other socials. though i do hate when people stereotype and gatekeep it, or water it down to "fem, pastel, cute way of coping for skinny white girls only"

not a lot, but if i stumble upon one in the tags i might read it :3c

yeah, but i dont really feel comfortable being tickled

stolas goetia from helluva boss!!!! he is literally my dada guys /silly

my preference changes constantly, but it would definitely have a crib that can be converted into a toddler/big kid bed w a canopy and mobile, a sensory tent, a bouncer, a play area and a deer rocker!!!

not really, it makes it harder for me to stay small sometimes

i regress because of trauma and anxiety, i age dream as a coping mechanism for stress, gender dysphoria and missing out on my childhood :3

i almost always have to be listening to music when small, regressed or age dreaming, and my music taste jus kinda stays the same

just boundaries i set for myself- dont intentionally seek out my triggers, dont stay up too late, eat when im hungry, etc

when i regress, i get very very clingy and sad and scared, so i come off as very needy and kinda annoying (+ blunt because i kinda forget how social rules work), when i age dream im basically the same as when im big, just gigglier and more childish

maybe!! i havent tried out caregiving before but i would like to!!

im in the process of learning italian, so i sometimes watch kids' shows in italian to help practice and to make myself feel smaller!!

[its-koili]

hey guys. sorry for being gone for so long. heres an update

(tw for: mention of violence / gore, general distress, mental health issues)

(tw below)

.

basically i had a huge mental health crisis. i was having 24/7 constant rolling panic attacks from may of 2023 to january of this year. my last big meltdown was in early february. been processing a lot of CSA trauma and some recent trauma that ive gone through. i think i talked about my panic attacks before leaving social media but idk i dont remember. isolated myself from absolutely everybody.

the main thing that made me leave was that while i was keeping up to date on the g3n0c1d3 (censoring bc idk how tumblr is about it), and when i was looking in the replies / related of the awareness videos, i came across 4 accounts dedicated to using gore for clicks / shock. not videos of the g3n0c1d3 (thank god bc of how they were using the vids) but of unfortunate every day situations and cam footage. like, the kind of stuff you could see on liveleak back in 2010. just out in the open on twitter. they all had usernames like "(insert number here) ways to die)". they were all content farms for click/ad revenue. it was too much it was a huge trigger and i had a full on meltdown. the bluecheck ppl on twitter were using the replies of the videos people uploaded for raising awareness to upload mindless g0re for money. the fact that peoople have 0 compassion for human life sent me into a spiral that i couldnt get out of. (i reported 3 out of the 4 accounts i was able to and 3 got taken down but 1 is still up and it odesnt seem to be uploading the hardcore g0r3 anymore. so thats good. but that was one of the reasons i left social media. ive been keeping up to date w the news but thats it. i left my socials entirely and ive only been on my phone to look up recipes or to use my computer for media research groceries and gaming and shows

that was the main thing that pushed me to leave. i just couldnt take it anymore. during the start of my crisis last year, i was planning on taking a small break, but all of that pushed me over the edge and i dropped everything. after that, my issues got worse and i dont remember most of it. thankfully. but i couldnt bring myself to talk to anybody. i isolated myself and just. laid in bed. but im doing better so i guess thats good

on another topic ive beeen nervous to post this on main but during all of this (ive talked abt tihs a little bit on my priv before i left) i found out that im a system a long while back. my dad (one of my abusers) had/has DID and it terrified me to think that i could be anything like him. i also knew cereal abuser who pretended to be a system to get away with stuff/abusing their friends (and then years later admitted that they werent a system and siad that systems are fake.) LOTS of tears. lots of crying over this. was in denial for a few weeks. cried some more. then eventually came to terms with it.

i dont want to post abt my system online too much bc i dont want to act like this is some fun trendy thing bc its not. it makes day to day living very hard (some lighter/funnier issues that make it hard are: arguing with an alter bc YOU dont know where THEY put YOUR MEDS, not being able to cook because one alter can and the other cant, your art style not being consistent because their styles are different). i dont want to really make it a massive part of my identity online bc its not a big deal! theres just Multiple Little Guys in my brain. so. im a system! im the same but....this explains why i dont remember talking to certain people SUIDHUFHX. i always felt bad. makes conversing with online friends hard especially if icons/usernames are changed. ill make a separate post about this someday thatll go into detail a bit more.

i went years thinking it was just "kinning" but it wasnt lol. it turns out that your personality completely shifting, tastes in food / music / art / media changing, the way you walk / talk dress changing, and having complete memory blackouts when you """"kin shift"""" isn't normal. /lh (dw ive had a lot of time to come to terms with this)

but basically right now ive been spending time getting to,,know myself?? iive been using simplyplural for myself for several months and im uncovering a lot of my memories / trauma ect bc alters can write down what they need to in the chat. so i can go back later and read it. its been v helpful!

i will not be coming back just yet. i have no interest in using social media rn or drawing or writing unfortunately. ive been working on my original stuff here and there but i havent been drawaing fandom stuff bc im not hyperfixating on a fandom.

also. some things have come up. im not going to say anything until the party in question is stable/safe/comfortable before i even suggest anything for context (i dont plan on talking abt anything at all unless they start talking publicly). right now i am helping someone through abuse. their wellbeing is my #1 concern. i'll think about other things after im sure theyre okay.

i dont really have any resolutions as to how things are going but i do feel better and im not having as many panic attacks. i dont really know where im going with this now sorry. just trying to brush over the basic topics before i go. idk if anybody remembers me bc ive been gone for so long so idk if im just talking into the wind but if i am thats fine honestly this is helping me reorganize my thoughts (i type these vents out a lot on docs so i probably wont remember posting this hiudhvu)

other than that. i dont draw or write anymore. i think in the past 6 months ive drawn like....5 things. its. weird. im completely disconnected from fandoms now. coming up to a full year of not having a hyperfixation at all.

my bday was on the 6th. im 27 now im very old (everybody forgot it asides from my husband (and the people he reminded) n my abuser). ive been trying to cook and bake more and ive been playing video games again. planning on getting back into drawing soon and working on my original stuff. when i come back im planning on redesigning my profiles and updating my social media bios and stuff bc theyre so old. also ill make a section on my carrd for my system. there you go theres some positivity to the update nxfjdfjh. sorry if i dont seem very enthused im very tired so typing has been a chore hfuidshuifv.

sorry that this was a lot or if it seems disjointed i was trying to put down as much into this as possible without making it too long

bye!!! see u all soon!

[dreamwinged]

harassment mention / tw sa (<- not sure if it counts but better to be safe than sorry) (sorry for posting about this ik it’s so unrelated to this blog or anything at all i just wanna get it off my chest and i think everyone irl thinks i’m being dramatic 😭) vent pls don’t read if you find that content triggering !!!!

im only just now really remembering it but last night while i was out i got grabbed like multiple times throughout the night and im so . ☹️i feel violated and i cant stop replaying it in my head like over and over and ik it could’ve been so much worse and next time i wont wear a skirt or anything like that but. :( i feel pretty awful abt it , ive never experienced anything like that intense before and i just eueuughhhh … idk even why i’m posting this but i think i just want to sort out my feelings a little bit bc when i told ppl they were jus like “oh yeah that stuff happens” which yeah it’s true but i still think i can simultaneously be a little upset and feel disgusted about it even if its not uncommon . it’s happened to me b4 but never this bad ; my friends luckily kept me rly safe and the second time there were even some guys who like blocked us off from the Creeps when they found out what was happening but. god i just feel gross abt it and the fact that i was too imtoxicated to even like register it makes me feel guilty . i should’ve like pushed them off or yelled at them or something but i was just like :/ . it happened to my friend too which is jsut even worse like i wanna kill those guys for doing that to us but. i guess i jsut won’t go out for awhile :(

[raid3r-r4bbit]

@fuzzydreamin thanks for the lol. ive been a little busy with life so sorry for the late response.

Favorite Color:

Green. Like Blindingly Neon almost yellow bile/acid toxic hazmat pukey green. Also black. I'm also a fan of earthy tones, warm greys and browns, rusty orangey reds, and i also unironically love that "some smoker lived here for 5+ years but i swear the walls are white" sepia color.

Last song:

Either Childish Flamingo or 1x1. I've been hopping in between really screamy and just goofy shit atm because i cant focus with anything else. 🤷 But (I also jsut got a new BMTH hoodie) BMTH's post human album has been feeding me. It's a really good (visual? no.) example of that like just angry and over it nihilist feeling and I just *MUNCH CRUNCH AAAA* like i feel like it could be just the tiniest bit angrier and louder but i think that's my headphones.

as for childish flamingo, its like that miseryxcpr thing imo. It's goofy and funny and it slaps. and it's so catchy. it's like right on the edge of aha funny and fuck you street and i love it. i hope any of that makes sense im sorry lol.

Last movie:

the Demon Slayer movie. I skipped all the way to the end to see the fight between Akaza and Rengoku because they're two of my favs ( in order from that show: Uzui (my mom calls yuzu (my cat) Uzui and its adorable) Akaza and Rengoku. I Found out the english dub is out (im way behind) and just needed to hear their english voice acting. all of it is amazing and Akaza's lil gigles during the fight make me incredibly happy. Guys who laugh/giggle mid combat? Ugh >\\x//<

Currently Watching:

Demon Slayer, Chainsaw man, Tokyo ghoul (im rewatching a bunch of animes) Steven universe. (i love all of these and full recommend them. I literally just yesterday(or the day before idk time is a blur) got a new funko pop, it's the half-kakuja kaneki and i love it.)

Other stuff i've watched this year:

Spy x Family, the Junji ito Collection, Yamishibai (if you like picture style art and horror this is great, its somewhat junji ito like, but shorter stories and ngl the zanbai ep scared me a bit) psychpass (some reccomended this to me cause im (obviously) a fan of darker more gruesome shows, and it is very dystopian, love the art work, but i just dont get it.) Given (if you havent watched this show please watch it its amazing) Yuri on ice, Banana Fish (also another fave)

(I work from home, and pretty much exist at my computer, and need to keep on music or tv to keep the bad thoughts out, so i have a lot of time and opportunity to watch stuff ok)

Shows I dropped this week:

Psycho pass. again, i just couldnt get into it. I know a lot of people seem to really like and it full seems like a show that would be up my alley. that first ep was kind of a lot though. I'm not ashamed to admit i love shows that are unafraid to show nudity and violence but the two together (ifykyk) make me uncomfortable. If this case had been a little further in the show i think it would have been fine, but it's litterally the first like ten minutes of the show. I also tried watching this a few week ago while at wasteland but we were pretty much just out the door.

Devil May Cry. I still love the games and the characters, and i remember loving the anime as a kid but its just... so different from the games lmao.

Currently Reading:

random internet stuff, fics and shit. I feel bad because i used to go to the library all the time but at the same time, i dont really have the room to store a whole bunch of books and despite being super dyslexic, i read insanely fast, so renting/buying books isnt worth it to me. (i've read entire full length series in the span of a day or two, while doing other stuff. I need longer, more conveniently packaged novels and that typically comes in the form of fanfiction. )

tagging: @snowmutant @ivanpahdrylakeracer @glaochormfitheach(idk if ur cool tagging you in this kinda stuff, if not just lmk i though it'd be fun :D) @the-soup-witch(im dragging you into tumblr culture whether you like it or not, welcome to tagging games)

[sidesteppostinghours]

9 and 25 for all of them !! :)

evening gideon!! thank you for the ask :]

9. Do you have a specific lyric or quote which you associate with your OC?

ok. so. the thing about me is that i dont actually listen to music all that often??? its mostly when i draw digitally, and im primarily a traditional artist so i dont really know that many songs. i also have shitty memory so its hard for me to remember quotes. aka this is a pretty hard question for me to answer, but i will try my best:

Caine-"Oh, captain, make up your mind/Before the salt burns your eyes and you run out of time/'Cause you're popping the cork, you get lost in your brain/And you lose touch with all the things that made you feel sane" - Ship in a Bottle (fin)

honestly ive never really associated this song with him before but i looked into the lyrics just to see whether it had anything i could think of them with and theres??? actually a bunch of lyrics there that fit???? like to the point i was struggling to decide which one to use for this. but i think this one, the second chorus, really encapsulates the biggest parts of their character. hes the decision maker out of all my steps, the one that knows how to make the logical choices and think his way out of a problem. but hes on a time limit. he doesn't know when it will end, just that it will at some point, and they cant stop if they want everything done in time. also sight and eyes is something i associate caine with a lot, especially closing your eyes/refusing to see. "you get lost in your brain/and you lose touch with all the things that made you feel sane." COUGHS. coughs. caine has the most gates open out of all my steps. i also fully intend to make them the source of hb 2.0. yeah.

Cyrus- HE WAS THE ONLY ONE I THOUGHT OF AN ANSWER FOR STRAIGHT AWAY AND I SPRINTED TO HIS TAG JUST TO FIND THE POST

look him in the eyes and say this to his face. he will look like he got hit by a freight train.

Cecilia- another quote!

im just gonna go ahead and put my own tags to this one because thats where i put it best:

#thinking about this again with ceci#the best part is the bullet hole#like yeah shes not ready to face the fact that everything shes been doing up till now#was just to distract herself from the absolute misery life became after heartbreak#she has FRIENDS she has people she CARES about and they even seem to like her back!!!!#she even has a girlfriend!#isnt that enough?#tell her thats enough#cecilia rider

theres a reason shes a thrill seeker yall.

Cynthia- "I swear, I'm so fucking sorry/I'm not a good person, I'm barely a person at all/But someday I'll be perfect, and I'll make up for it all" - Against the Kitchen Floor (Will Wood)

uh. *looks at cynthias relationship with ortega* uhhhh. *looks at cynthias relationship with sidestep*. uhhhhhhhh.

this song was also difficult to choose lyrics out of, but there is just something so special about girls who simply have to be the best they can to make up for the sin of being. there is something equally as special about girls who take their past selves as judge, and their lover as executioner. also "im not a good person, im barely a person at all" kills me. the regene flavouring on that line??? utterly insane of mr wood to make a song just for her.

25. What is your favorite thing about your OC?

THESE BITCHES ARE SO CONTRADICTORY!!! THERE IS ALWAYS SOMETHING CLASHING ABOUT THESE FUCKERS AND ITS DELICIOUS. not even just trait wise, but with their themes? their core ideals? their relationships???? its always some sort of fucking fundamental difference shaping the way they act and i am Obsessed with it. also all of them are dangerous and it makes me vibrate a little bit. rangers you are so lucky that none of them are interested in leaning into being a full blown villain. but this question is,,, also difficult to answer because idk how to pick just one favourite lmfao. i will attempt it though.

Caine- he is the normalest guy around. there is also something Deeply Wrong with him. my favourite thing about caine would probably be how fun it is to dive into his psyche! ill often have times where i get bored of them and wonder why i got so interested in the first place, and then i get hit with another round of it and i remember "oh right! its because hes insane." his whole character revolves around what is going on inside their brain, from their high subterfuge to their connection with heartbreak and his relationship with the puppet. theyre the most fun to play with in their mind.

Cyrus- god. my favourite thing about him is a tie between his stubbornness and his surprisingly strong sense of empathy. both of those were the things keeping him from becoming a villain in the first place, and now its whats stopping him from going back to being a hero. i want him to confront what hes become so bad yall dont understand-

Cecilia- cecilia is just. a breath of fresh air. shes easy and super fun to play, and while she certainly has her moments (i am looking directly at the checkpoint three mortum reveal scene), shes mostly lighthearted fun cruising through the game as nothing more than a silly guy. i think the next game will actually dig into her character more deeply and allow me to showcase the parts of her shed usually keep hidden, but for now im having a good time getting her to kiss argent and embarrass her friends.

Cynthia- somebody come pick her up please before she starts crying in this club. she is crying because of me but lets not talk about that. i think my favourite thing about her is the contrast between her general wimpy sad lovergirl disposition and her revenge scar, and how she chooses to cope with it! because like,,,, it is just so so tasty watching her fumble with the overwhelming emotion, Especially since the emotion is hurting people. she never learned what to do with the anger! she does not want it! she wants to be as kind to other people as possible! "im not a bad dog, i dont know why i bite" etc etc. eventually she might figure it out, but Definitely Not Now lmfao.

questions from here!

[a-court-of-moonlight-and-ire]

Greetings everyone! So uhm. its been a while since my last liveblog post. there have been some circumstances that made me really not wanna read, but now they have passed and I have risen from the ashes like a glorious phoenix and I can resume my divine mission of complaining about this mediocre-at-best book series to an audience of as many as 60 people if you can believe it. Also we're back to the style of post where I just jot down all my thoughts bullet-point style because my life is in shambles

Anyway, last time we had a chapter where literally nothing happened except for Lucien showing up at the very end, so lets see what he does in this chapter 47

I still cant believe its been only two months since Feyre started permanently living at the night court and forgiving Rhysand for torturing her, its taken me longer to forgive people at my school who mildly annoyed me. Also wait, Feyre was UTM for three months, shes spent more time consecutively being tortured by Rhysand than consecutively having a good time with him wth

Feyre stop fuckin jacking the bat boys off challenge (impossible!!)

Ive seen this part where Feyre talks about the bat boys being so much stronger than Lucien in english where shes like "Lucien may have trained to be a warrior, but Cassian, Azriel and Rhys were Warriors" like oh fuck, we gotta get out of here!! those guys are Proper Nouns!! But in the german version, this line is just "Lucien may have trained to become a warrior, but Cassian, Azriel and Rhysand were warriors" because nouns are always capitalized in german and not just when theyre Super Epic and Cool so you cant do that thing that english books do with proper nouns, and Idk i think thats pretty interesting

Something about Feyre being all like "theyre hunting me, its like Im their prey" really pisses me off, I think its because it could be cool and thematically relevant but instead its just kindof nothing

Speaking of which, Lucien coming ip to her and saying "We've been hunting for you" is so forced, it reminds me of how Tamlin would say these weird objectifying things to Feyre alllll the way at the start of ACOMAF even though hes never said shit like that before, except this is way worse because who on earth would say it like that?? hello?? If you were looking for someone who went missing, you'd say like, we've been searching for you or we've been looking for you, not we've been hunting for you thats just insane

HUH?? which high lord gave her the ability to slow down time??? Thats so overpowered and I dont remember anyone ever talking about it

Oh, of course they cant just be afraid of Feyre, they have to be afraid of Rhysand who just showed up

Did this motherfucker really take the time to change his outfit just make his dramatic entrance just a little more dramatic? Honestly, if it was any other guy I would think thats so iconic, but because its Rhysand just wearing his fucking black tunic again I just want him to explode

"Has your mother, the Lady of the Autumn Court, not taught you that you should listen to a lady?" why he have to say that Lucien's mom is the Lady of the Autumn Court thats so awkward. Also yeah, it sounds more awkward translated from german to english because they use both 'Lady' and 'Dame' (which is german for lady) in the same sentence, but its still just a very bad line

This is actually kind of interesting because Im guessing Lucien called Rhys a dirty son of a bitch in the original and then he growled because its like, oh Lucien insulted his lovely mother that he loves soooo much, but its been translated here as 'Hurensohn' (lit. 'whore's son') so it gains this additional layer where Lucien is not just insulting his mom also using a word that's like a trigger for him which makes it much more impactful imo. good job, Ms. Ernst

The fact that Feyre is getting on Lucien's case for siding with Gamlin over her is mighty ironic when you consider whats gonna happen in acosf, but also Lucien right now and the IC in acosf are making the same choice of listening to their close friend of several centuries over his gf that theyve known for like a year. Like, yeah, obviously its super shitty in both cases but I do get why they did it. And thats not even factoring in the political power Tamlin and Rhys have over their friends, like, it really doesnt matter if you "dont enforce rank" because youre the super special ones who were literally chosen by god to rule, you have an inherent authority over the people around you

This is all so frustrating because I do sympathize with Feyre for feeling abandoned by Lucien because that is essentially what he did, but I really dont like how hes portrayed as being unambigiously in the wrong for caring more about politics or himself than Feyre when its like, first of all, politics impact sooooo many people of course making sure that the SC at leats looks stable from the outside is more important than Feyre's mental health, and second of all, Feyre also pretty much only cares about herself. Which is her right btw, she has been very traumatized, she should be prioritizing herself for a while now, i just dont like the way the narrative frames this whole thing

Honestly, Feyre's kinda slaying rn. Her with her big spooky bat wings being all like "when youve been trapped in the darkness for so long it becomes your best friend" is kinda cool, idc

Okay, nevermind, she slayed for exactly one line and then she was nearly choking on Tamlin's name "because of what Rhysand did to him" girlie that was centuries ago why are you making this about him when he was being abusive two months ago* *i dont think he was actually being abuse but thats the framing of the narrative so im just going with it

I would usually properly translate this line but my brain isnt up to it at the moment, but its onpage 528 and I think you'll know which one I mean if you look at it, but I dont really understand Feyre being like "if I had stayed at the spring court and just given myself over to my own misery, I wouldve learned to take pleasure in other people's pain" Is it trying to justify Feyre being needlessly cruel by implying that it was inevitable and that her UTM trauma would've made her become like this no matter what? First of all, you cant say that for sure though and second of all, wowweweee Sarah Janett Maas knows soooooo much about mental health, she should become a psychiatrist, no degree necessary

"You are dead. You and your entire damned court." ohhhhhh so THATS why they call him death incarnate. Someone bring him back to life so no one ever calls him that again

??? Feyre was talking about how weird she felt about her lack of feeling when she was speaking to Lucien just now, but she was thinking about feeling guilty for desjring Rhysand?? what. Am i just being stupid rn or are those things no in any way related

man this chapter was exhausting

[genlossneg]

ok. i didnt mind genloss, it was ranboos first massive project, theyre only 19 and a streamer, ok. but oh my god would it kill to take an improv class. the first 2 episodes felt like an snl skit. especially when it was branded as original and then was just some sort of frankenstein of different horror tropes from ranboos favourite horror media, that just reminded me of snl stealing joel havers skit lmao.

there were so much issues with it and i feel like i wouldnt mind as much if it was branded as a horror comedy a few months before the show, not 3 days before the show. a few months before and the weeks leading up to may 24th, it was branded as "you arent ready for this. this is groundbreaking, nothing will ever be the same after this show. this is serious." etc and then i think it was like 3 days before may 24th there was that fucking showfall media psa that just felt like ranboo saying "oh btw its a comedy" without warning it caught me so off gaurd lmao.

then he streamed after that sfm psa released and, if i remember right, people were asking about it being a horror comedy in chat and ranboo was like "well yeah obviously did u think id make a project 100% serious? no lol" (dont quote me on that though its been a while) now theyre saying gen 0 and gen 2 are going to be completely horror now, but i dont think thats true bc they also said gen 1 was mostly horror and none of it is

speaking of, the advertising was just lies lol. the whole "little to no filler :D" thing. it wasnt like ranboo didnt expect the improv to last that long bc the expected runtimes (from their tumblr post on may 23rd i think) were sometimes longer than the actual ones. 1st ep was meant to be 1-2 hours, it was 1 and a half, so that much filler and standing around going "what the hell man" was PLANNED. they just lied about no filler to make people excited. just be funny and i wont mind the filler. i like sneegs humour in his streams but here he was just bickering with ranboo. same with ranboo to charlie, charlie was the only one making actual jokes so when ranboo and sneeg were alone it was just "wait so why didnt you just-" "well idk i thought u woul-" "well why would i-" and when i tell you it drained my soul.

ive been a massive ranboo fan for about a year (im recovering dw), and after the game theory episode i got really hyperfixated on genloss (up until the sfm keynote thing i think). i was hyped for it back when T_1 was the only thing released for genloss, and followed it all the way up to the streams. i watched them live and my face was just like 😐 I WAS SO DISSAPPOINTED LMAOOO

the box being 18k pissed me off so much bc an experienced filmmaker/writer/director could make something so much better than genloss with just that 18k. i aspire to make my own live action thing one day, and like, hearing them go "oh yeah the box was 18k and jermas face prosthetics were 10k teehee🤪🤪" was just. AAAAA. and the thing is, like the prosthetics were funny, but spending TEN THOUSAND DOLLARS as a BIT from jerma going "what if i took off the mask and it just doesnt look like me lol" then framing urself as jesus christ and a victim. i am so mad.

idk how to feel about ranboo anymore, i used to watch like every 2nd stream for a while but then the whole "GUYS BUY MY MERCH also racism bad MERCH!!!!! BUY!!!!" thing made me rethink lol. the racist and misogynistic undertones in genloss made me so uncomfy, and while im not poc so i cant speak on that, i have enough sense to know that having the only poc in the entire show play evil rats is so tone deaf.

and niki!! i was worried when the teasers were coming out bc every single person shown in it was a white guy (and a white enby), so i was kind of happier when niki showed up, but then she died within the hour to "commentate on misogyny in media". ranboo thought that he was commentating on misogyny by contributing to it. did they think this through at all. i would have LOVED if they did something special with niki and something powerful, but all that happened was she showed up, cried, then died and now ranboo fans are going "ranboo was so real for this!!!". ik niki had control over her characters writing but im sure ranboo was the one who decided when certain characters died and stuff.

also i hate to say this but the mask flashing to signify if he was in control or not was EXACTLY like a thing in the undertale fanfic (sfw im not weird) i wrote when i was 12 💀💀the characters eyes would flash when they were under control bc edgy. it was so weird watching genloss with that in the back of my mind 💀💀💀💀

in conlusion, genloss had so many flaws and so much easy fixes that it just feels so sososososososo rushed. another year in the oven wouldve been ok i think.

woah this is long im so sorry i do not think only type oops

- the i feel like i should label what kind of anon i am lmao anon

sorry before i get to anything else the undertale bit caught me so off guard omg.

anyways.

it wasnt like ranboo didnt expect the improv to last that long bc the expected runtimes (from their tumblr post on may 23rd i think) were sometimes longer than the actual ones. 1st ep was meant to be 1-2 hours, it was 1 and a half, so that much filler and standing around going "what the hell man" was PLANNED.

this!! the way the second stream just.. dragged was so rough.

the poc/women diversity discussion is something we had on the blog a bit ago as im sure you've seen so i don't have a ton to add but. yeah there were certainly choices that got made there.

very much enjoying all the essays getting dropped in here (even if i feel like my responses are weak sometimes lmao)

[tartppola]

Fine day, if I may leave a message (that I wish shall lift the sides of your lips for today), I would like to say,

YOUR SILVER AND YUULIS COMICS ARE SO!!!! DCRUMPTIOUS I AM SO EMOTIONALLY INVESTED IN IT ESPECIALLY THEM AS KIDS ITS SO ❤️😭 that i wanna go cROOWWOmpCHustomMMRP (I tries making it slubd like the sound im making rn and im not sure if its fallin thru) BUT YEAH I LOVE IT

Especially like,,, lilia and your yuu??? I wanna see more from them honestly the dynamic is so funny like its just the rhing youll take out to get a good laugh on before going on to the rest of your day + your yuu is just so interesting in general that i wanna know more of them and their syory in general and plus,, your art????

Your art is so cute, irs simple, sure but i can see it, the absolute hardwork in it and how it feels so special that when i see it, i know its yours and not anyone else??? Bc its kind of ingrained in a way plus it looks so,, warm? And nice i cant explain it eloquently enough rn mb mb 😭 but i hope the sincerity and genuinity comes through plus how dare you make me so invested in ace + deuce+ yuu so much more like?????? I can't believe youve done this to me and now w how much im invested bc each time i see your artwork of those three (+ grim) its now lowkey ngl my oasis in a scorching desert because i barely see content for them and stuff so now when i see your work i just go !!!!OHHHH!!! Whooooahh!!! Or just :) its them! (Cue me kicking my feet later about it when i think about it)

Oh and if i remember righr??? YOUR KALIM COMIC!! i think its the first one i saw from you the hiwagang ganda(?) Or somrthing where kalim just goes ... wow... while seeing yuu in a crowd and stuff its so cute and everything began falling for me there bc then you began hunting my recommendations feed and im so glad you did thank you, blessed, tskr, and I hope you have a nice day and everytime you finish a drawing you will always smile and feel content

And also i think i recall a post from you making a copypasta(?) Of lyrics and that was so weirdly funny in a way that for the next weeks of it, whenever i think of it i just smile like,,,?? AHHAHA but anyways sleep well and tqke care od youtself and everything and sorry if i gave you a syroke w this 😭 (like the misspells and stuff)

AHSGSHHFKF omg!! sorry this took so ling to respond i get like super overwhelmed when i see big blocks of text but aaaaa tysm!!!!

i’m so honored that you feel that way about my art hhhabdkf ngl i haven’t been able to do more than doodles as of late cus of college + zines but im so glad you still like my silly littol doodles uhuhuhu

i’m also glad that you’ve taken a liking to my guy yuulis uhuhehdhf theyre just my silly little guy! NOT GONNA LIE.....they don’t have that much lore HAHDHAHHDD ( only like super close oomfs know their lore 👁👁 ) but I do have a separate canon divergent version of ch.7 where I hamfist Yuulis lore into it HAGDHAHAHA but I want to see how ch.7 goes first before finalizing it.

and also aaa i’m so glad you like the Young Silver + Lilia comics! they’ve been such a comfort to draw and think about lately hhgrhg

AND IM ESPECIALLY GLAD IVE INFECTED U WITH THE ADEUYUU BRAINWORMS EHHEHEAAAARGHH Ace and Deuce compared to other characters are already so,, so hard to find individually,,,ITS ALSO EVEN HARDR TO FIND STUFF OF THEM AS A COLLECTIVE UUUHUHUHU,,, i’ll definitely draw them more!

[boypussydilf]

sherlock. what is it's gender. what is their deal. speak your trutg

oh dear with the state of my blog its now hard to tell when people walk up to me and say sherlock if they mean dgs sherlock the og or any of the several others ive started talking about. we need to like. color code them. anyway im gonna talk about dgs sherlock bc hes the one im most likely to have proper thoughts on and then probably also do one for mostly just. like. the general concept actually thinking about it i do have many thoughts on Non-DGS Sherlock i dont know why i allowed myself to think i didnt . i just get caught up in the bimbo dad but i like the entire folder hes stored in

dgs first tho <333333

Sexuality Headcanon: gay. Just gay

Gender Headcanon: If i had to make 1 decision. genderfluid <3 Sherlock Holmes (DGS) can fit so much gender in her !!!!!!!!!

A ship I have with said character: *looks at my blog* *looks at my pinned post* um i think you guys know . already. the only one i have . do i need to say it

A BROTP I have with said character: i mean. Iris. they r best friends for real ! they r like the most important people to each other ! they r this guy and their 10 year old daughter who packs peanut butter jelly sandwiches for them !!!

A NOTP I have with said character: im gonna be petty and say vanlock. i blocked the tag bc i got tired of seeing it. actually even moreso i like physically recoil when i see ppl shipping him with ryuu, it fucking. completely baffles me. like. nothing wrong with that. people who ship them aren’t weird in That sense. but theyre weird as in I can’t understand what compels you to do this . i dont like vanlock but i can Understand why people do i just got extra sick of it bc its semi common. i cant understand why people ship sherlock and ryuu. like youve misread the vibe badly. this is not it. oh dear god this just got 5 times as long as all the other sections of this fucking ask meme. power of being slightly annoyed sorry

A random headcanon: UHHHHHHHHHH OH MY GOD . I KNOW i have headcanons abou t this bitch he swarms around in my mind all the time. I am imagining Random Exploits of the DGS Cast on a daily basis where did the fucking Concepts and Ideas go. ill return to this once ive done everything else and see if i havent thought of anything fun by then. ive thought about it some more and my most recent thought on him has been like. she knows some russian and japanese right? actually a fucking lot of russian to be able to read entire newspaper articles but thats besides the point i just think that sherlock knowing several different languages is neat but, Like. its pure chance if she ever manages to learn enough to be able to …. use it. once every several months sherlock will get really really excited about a new foreign language and put in like 2 weeks of work before forgetting about it completely. he has the vocabulary of a very young toddler in half a dozen different languages and is remembering those vocabularies by sheer luck

General Opinion over said character: Im normal iam normal normal im normal and regular . im normal and im normal about him and i dont intend to put him under a microscope or anything. i am not putting him in a little plastic box and shaking him to find out what happens . *extends my hand ibuprofen style* who wants to speculate about dgs in hyperspecific ways with me. hello my like 3 dgs followers do you have thoughts on sherlock holmes. tell them to me. lets all be normal. Anyway uh hes funny

IVE GOTTEN THAT BITCH OUT OF THE WAY LETS TALK ABOUT …… im not even sure. The General Concept of Sherlock Holmes on a Wide Scale, which, like, ultimately probably just boils down to: acd holmes. time to get philosophical with it. thats not the right word.

Sexuality Headcanon: sherlock is either gay or aroace or some more specific combination of all previous terms. Hey does that… even count as headcanon? Ultimately my stance is “whatever as long as sherlock holmes is not interested in women” and it is stated very clearly explicitly and repeatedly in canon that sherlock holmes is not interested in women so . like.

Gender Headcanon: You know what’s funny is expressing disdain for women is an effective way to distance yourself from femininity in general, for instance, to assert masculinity as a trans man, or as a negative reaction to being a trans woman. So. Like.

A ship I have with said character: at first i was like “its just kind of an objective fact that sherlock and watson are gay but i dont have emotional investment in it” but that was a fucking lie

A BROTP I have with said character: SHERLOCK HOLMES DOES NOT HAVE FRIENDS. I DONT FUCKING KNOW, TOBY THE DOG?

A NOTP I have with said character: The next time an adaptation tries to make him and irene adler straight together im going to thr authors house and shooting them point blank. shut up shut up shut up shut up. they would NOT

A random headcanon: man i dont even fucking know. he probably eats food off the floor and i mean this genuinely

General Opinion over said character: Sherlock Holmes is the ultimate Little Freak. Like 80% of the joy of any sherlock holmes media is “Watch this Freak Behave Oddly”. Some people think he would be hard to get along with personally i think we would make very good friends and i would love to hang out with the Freak.

Man. I hope this post isn’t actually as long and hard to look at as it looks in the mobile post editor. Unfortunately it probably is

[another-dra-anew]

tsu!!

My identity hc for them

see tomori, strike that, reverse it! he knows he likes guys, and he's kinda just seeing what happens past that! hes vibing w/himself and hes just kinda chilling, hes content without a label for his attraction

aaaand hes a trans lad! similar to tomori sometimes he feels more binary trans sometimes not he's really just chillin ! to make this section longer uhhhm. i think his relationship with his past is like. "i have always been a boy, my body is a guys body, and when i was younger i was a boy, same as today. but also i was a girl once i was a small little girl and she is not alive anymore but also she is still here standing right in front of u when u look at me, same as she ever was and as she always will be. but also i am me myself and i am a boy. okie?" and refuses to explain or elaborate (he probably said this to kouhei. kouhei doesnt ask hes just like "okie". tbh kouhei prolly didnt ask in the first place tsu just started talking)

Thoughts on their home life/family

! yk as special reward for everyone who takes the time to read through this i will give u a spoile-y. as a treat. tsurugi was born when a piece of snow came in through a chimney and landed in the fire. and many many miles away, from the stump of the tree that was cut down to be logs for that fire, tsurugi tumbled out of a naturally occurring divot in the wood. this is very true and i just hope u all know the power that comes with this information!!! <333

(ofc, thats all jokes! tsu is a bunch of ice crystals from a sun halo, all swirled together and gently sent down to the earth)

How i feel about their canonical writing/handling

how... do i not spoil things. u have to have patience with his writing. i promise he is more than like.. manic pixie leftist cop boy. u just have to have patience. boy wears his heart on his sleeve. but also he has a bunch of plastic wrap around it. u can see his heart it is the textbook definition of on his sleeve. but it is obscured and u cannot reach it. every day before i sleep i get on my knees and pray that people have faith in his writing and don't think the way he's written is cringefail.

The one thing i’d want to make canon about them

i cant remember if this factoid has come up but i dont think it has in any posts. tsu's hair is like.... really choppy, if u brushed it out/took a straightener to it to get it all flat, you'd see its alll different lengths. bc he tends to get twigs and sticks and the like stuck in there and just. cuts hair off/"oh this bit is too long! *snip*" a lot. that being said it looks oddly intentional/u cant tell its a million different lengths with how he styles it. he will cry if anyone tries to drag him to a hair stylist.

My number one favorite ship for them

tsuhara. ch1 spoilers this is just text encoded in hex google hex to text decoder and u should be good. 74 68 69 73 20 69 73 20 77 68 79 20 69 20 77 61 6E 74 20 74 6F 20 72 65 77 72 69 74 65 20 74 68 65 20 63 68 31 20 69 6E 76 65 73 74 69 67 61 74 69 6F 6E 20 73 6F 20 62 61 64 6C 79 2E 20 69 20 77 61 6E 74 20 74 6F 20 68 61 6E 64 6C 65 20 74 68 65 69 72 20 69 6E 74 65 72 61 63 74 69 6F 6E 73 20 28 61 6C 6F 6E 67 20 77 69 74 68 20 74 73 75 73 20 69 6E 6E 65 72 20 6D 6F 6E 6F 6C 6F 67 75 65 29 20 61 20 6C 6F 74 20 64 69 66 66 65 72 65 6E 74 6C 79 21

…Now everyone else i ship with them

i mean he is besties with everyone? many platonic ships. he is friend shaped !

The thing i will NEVER ship

like many of the ask meme fills so far: his wrist is limp, your honor...

a dynamic/relationship i wish was explored more (in canon, or in fandom)

tsurugi is incapable of leaving anyone alone. he. nothing needs to be explored more. tsu & alone time perhaps.

thoughts on their design (appearance-wise)

im not even gonna lie trying to work out fits for him always makes me want to explode. i may rework his fit again soon ive already made minor changes which i havent mentioned. that in mind his bandages and bracelets and bruises are alllways gonna be the same! theyre eternal!

A music-related thought- a song that reminds me of them, or what their music taste is, etc

rule #4 - fish in a birdcage was playing when i started this post. the reason its on any of my playlists is bc i heard it and went fuck. uhhhh. yeah rule #4 fish in a birdcage would be very tsu and kouhei except jk!!! there is nothing slightly odd or abnodmal or not right with either of the people i mentioned theyre totally fine. mhm mhm!

anyways funnily enough he actually doesnt have a playlist. uhhh. actually he's got a lot of playlists with other characters but not his own... i started this w/a tsu + someone else song so ill only list individual ones from here on out akjdsjkkjdsdk

i thiiink all of sweet trip's "you will never know why" album (im bad with my memory and dont feel like going to look at it all) but especially your world is eternally complete + milk. hmmm. theres some others but this is good i think!

[mbat]

no cause earlier i had a straight guy i know telling me and my friend what we could and couldnt say as gay people?? and it was like? girl whered you get the authority??

cause. okay so me and my friends like to throw around the faggot word as a joke in private just because we find it funny, we dont use it to insult people we just use it in a silly way yknow, and obviously i reblog stuff on tumblr that also has that word occasionally

and in the discord i posted a meme that had it, it was literally just this:

and this dude is like "language" and i thought he was joking like in that way that people say language when someone curses or whatever, but he was NOT

AND HE WAS LIKE 'I DONT FIND BIGOTRY FUNNY' IM QUEER?? ME AND MY FRIEND ARE BOTH QUEER??? the meme wasnt even directed at anyone ??

and he just suddenly starts arguing with us hardcore about how no one should say slurs and how its bigoted no matter how people use it, even gay people.

and we were trying to say 'this is us reclaiming a word that has literally been used against our people and us specifically because its taking back power that we didnt have before, and its taking the power away from this word that was used to hurt people before, and instead making it a funny silly thing so that its powerless' and whatever yknow?

and this dude was just NOT listening. bro did not read a thing i swear. and when we all just started trying to send memes to make him shut the fuck up cause we were clearly done with the conversation but he wasnt. he had the GALL to say 'you know im right and youre deflecting because you dont have any real justification' SHUT UPPP SHUT THE FUCK UP

the way me and my friend in a private chat were talking about all the ways that being queer has been difficult for us, specifically the ways that queerphobic people have attacked us both online and irl, how reclaiming these words is like saying fuck you to all those people who did those awful things. like... this guy who has NEVER experienced any of that stuff AND NEVER COULD was trying to tell us how we should handle our own identities. where did you get the authority.

like, literally people have come into queer spaces ive been in before and spammed transphobic caricatures and nazi imagery, sent full on porn in the main chat in a server that had minors in it (it was a fucking minecraft server of all places too), someone has literally sent me an image of literal corpses because im queer. i still remember the way i felt the first time someone called me a tranny, it sent a shock through my whole body. it wasnt that it necessarily even hurt, but it felt like i was a tuning fork that got smacked against a wall at full force.

so yeah. i will say the words faggot and tranny in a silly little way all i want, and someone whos never been in my place cant tell me not to. if theres anyone who shouldnt be allowed to say these words, its the people who did all those things i mentioned above, because they would only ever use those words as a weapon. using these words, for me, is like taking a sword and melting it down into a little dog statue, just a silly little thing.

look, its valid, MORE than valid, for people to be uncomfortable with these words, and not like them, and not want them said around them and especially about them, but you cant tell me that i cant say it in my own life. this guy wasnt advocating that we simply stop using it in the discord, he was outright saying we just never say it ever again. and that was just like... who gave you the right? weve fought for this. weve been through a lot for this. i spent a lot of years scared of so many things and words, and im sick of being scared.

i know this was super dramatic over a stupid discord argument but it really came out of nowhere and made me reflect on a few things. i love to reclaim words (that i can) and, to an extent, imagery and stereotypes, because it feels so good to turn these harmful things into something that makes me laugh, or hell, even just smile. i dont care that its weird, i dont care that it probably looks bad, because like... honestly fuck off? its my life.

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i just watched saw 2004 after like 10 years of hearing about it and like 2 years of seeing gay fanart of it THAT SHIT WAS CRAZY that shit was nuts hold on i wanna talk about it a sec

only really talking about the first movie because thats the only one ive seen as of 10 minutes ago but i know theres like. 20 other movies or something. theres like 50 other movies. who knows BUT you know this movie because of its status as the first in a somewhat infamous franchise, its reputation really takes over

like FIRST OF ALL i was a little scared to watch it because like, im good with horror movies and im usually pretty good with blood and gore (particularly with movies released before 2010, post 2010 movies have a style of cgi gore that like makes me. dizzy? motion sick? i have no clue LOL) BUT i shouldntve have been that scared like its not too bad, im assuming the sequels probably up the stakes so thats probably where it gets its reputation. LIKE dont get me wrong its bloody but surprisingly a lot of shit was off screen or barely in focus, like the foot situation or Sing getting killed in the gun trap. the only thing that got to me was Tapp's throat getting cut but i think i just personally get squeamish about gore with necks and heads for some reason LOL my one weakness......

second of all and this is purely a me thing but ive always jokingly referred to saw 1 as like. patient 0 of the post 2000s blue-ification of horror movies (weird incomprehensible observation i have. im sure it started earlier but horror every movie after 1999 kept getting more and more blue visually to me fkjdahkfds) in my head because every clip ive seen from it was in the bathroom which has some strong blue color grading BUT thats not fair. this movie is also very green. and has its reddish moments. i view movie colour grading like this. sorry

but speaking of its green and red moments NOBODY told me how nuts the plot of this movie is. there were like 20 different plotlines intertwined and like every 20 minutes there was a new twist half of the dialogue was written like a detective manga it RULED i loved all the monologuing adam and lawrence did at each other near the end in the bathroom VERY horror mystery light novel esque. half expected someone to turn their back to the camera and spin around pointing saying "and the murderer was YOU" despite that not being what the movie was about LOL and like the editing really added this near, like, absurdity to the pacing, really heightened which i think makes the bloodier bits more palatable too, really great

and lemme tell you. they were not joking about the homoeroticism in this feature film like Tapp and Sing. Tapp and Sing. okay tapp's my favourite character I KNOW hes an obsessive unhinged disgraced ex cop BUT thats why he slays. and man people dont talk about it but Tapp's relationship with Sing and his obsession with vengeance really haunts the first 3/4s of the movie, talk about haunting the narrative with Sing wowza. and then that last 1/4 with like the most heartwrenching "dont leave me" from Adam topped it off.

great movie. i was not expecting the final twist IT CAUGHT ME OFF GUARD SOMEHOW after 20 years...the twist got me.... probably because there were like twelve other twists before it LOL soundtracks really good too. almost action movie theme esque?

will you think less of me for the next sentence i am about to write. so ive been really into movies where dudes get locked up in scary bathrooms and warehouses and get tortured in shitty little white t shirts. i watched some found footage movie that was probably inspired by by saw that i cant remember the name of or much about BUT i do remember thinking the same thing when it got to a part where some guy gets locked in a scary warehouse in his pajamas. lock a guy in a scary bathroom today, its good 👍